#My kid is 25 but it still scares the ever loving fuck out of me when they leave the house in anything that doesn't “aligin” with their AGAB

[this-is-not-a-slow-burn]

CW violence

Big shocker that LoTT had a role in this. Not even so indirectly. Absolute waste of brain matter that one is.

[madeforstarker]

Drabble for @pparkerbingo for the prompt fill: FRIENDS ♡

Summary: It's Tony and Peter's wedding, Rhodey's going to give a speech... and oh, their other friends are also here too...

Tags: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Everyone's Human, No Earth 616 Bullshit, Tony (25), Peter (22), Fluff, Humor, Rhodey is a good bro, Found Family

“Hi, everyone, I’m James Rhodes, I used to be Tony Stark’s best friend until apparently, he said in his vows that he’s marrying his best friend and yet, I don’t see a ring on my finger,” Rhodey says as he starts his best man speech.

Tony chuckles beside Peter, the kid, his husband looking beautiful in an all white three piece suit that was custom-made for him, on top of his curls was a pretty veil. He sighs, god, he finally married his dream boy.

“Anyway, we met— what? Ten years ago? He was a fifteen year old Freshman midget while I was a regular not-so super genius eighteen year old Freshman as well.” His best friend says with an informative tone.

“Oh boy, I think I know where this is going,” Tony mutters, pressing his nose against Peter’s shoulder.

Peter giggles, “is it an embarrassing story, love?” His husband asks softly, doe-like eyes glistening with mirth, “do I know this story?”

He lets out a chuckle, “no love, I don’t think Rhodey has ever told this story to the gang,” Tony says, tightening his hold on Peter’s shoulders.

“Anyway, he told me— a fifteen year old, ‘heads up, platypus! I’ll be bringing some girls and some boys to our dorm and if that scares you then it’s not my fault!’ I repeat, ladies and gentlemen, and everyone in between, Tones was fifteen!”

The crowd laughs softly at the indignance in Rhodey’s tone.

“Rhodes, any time now! We’re gettin’ old!” Bucky, Peter’s best friend yells from the table where their gang sat.

Tony rolls his eyes, “his speech was twenty minutes, 18 minutes were my mistakes and insults towards me, why is he your best friend again?” He whispers to Peter.

The boy grunts, “because he insults you, Mr. Stark, so— how many boys and girls did you bring home to the dorm huh?” Peter asks him, a meticulously groomed brow raised.

He was about to make an excuse when Rhodey’s voice interrupts them, “shout out to our friend group by the way, we call ourselves the Avengers, we all went to MIT because we’re all badass and we all actually witnessed the start of Tony and Peter’s relationship.”

“They were obsessed!” Sam comments with a grin.

��Still are,” Steves corrects Sam.

Rhodey snaps his fingers, “that is correct my friends, they are obsessed with each other, which brings me to my second part of the story!”

“Oh come on!” Bucky complains.

“After hearing that from a smug fifteen year old, of course I just had to see it with my own eyes right? So I waited! Bro, the boy didn’t bring home a boy until we were in third year! And guess what? He fucking married the boy!”

The crowd erupted into cheers and laughter, realizing that the only boy he brought home to the dorm was Peter.

“Oh,” Peter murmurs.

Tony smirks, “remember that honey? September seventeen two thousand eighteen, MIT dorms after the Freshman Welcoming Party.”

“I was—”

“You were the only boy I brought to the dorm, love, no one else.” Tony whispers softly, pressing a kiss on the younger man’s forehead.

“Anyway, cheers to Tony and Peter, may they learn to lock doors whenever they fuck!” Rhodey cheers as the rest of their friend group howls in laughter.

Peter sighs, “we need a new set of friends, love.”

“Yeah, normal ones,” Tony adds.

[love-kurdt]

Swooping, Sloping, Cursive Letters: 9

word count: 462

PLEASE READ THIS IS ME TRYING FIRST, AS THIS STORY RELIES HEAVILY UPON THE CONTEXT OF TIMT

March 25, 1988

Dear Will,

Happy Birthday! I know I already told you over the phone and in person on the actual day, organized a party for this weekend at your house (with your mom’s help), and took my best shot at icing calligraphy while writing “happy birthday,” on a homemade red velvet cake, but I thought I’d say it one more time, just to make sure you got the memo. How does it feel to be seventeen? You must feel so much more enlightened than you did yesterday. Just kidding. I’ll bet it feels just the same. All the cool stuff will happen next year. But seventeen is still worth celebrating. You made it through another year!

Honestly, all the birthdays you’ve had ever since November 1983 have made me so fucking emotional. Every year that passes and every birthday of yours that we celebrate makes me feel such a strong sense of pride for you, for making it this far. You’re so resilient, so dauntless, so powerful. Life has thrown every single hurdle imaginable at you, and you have managed to rise out of the worst situations with a rare type of grace. I wish I could be more like you.

I wasn’t really sure of what to get you this year, because I kind of stumped myself trying to figure out how to give you the world. I found this set of dice, though, and they were just… so you. They were a deep, translucent purple with gold stars painted around each number, all of which were also gold. They reminded me of your Will the Wise costume. I know you haven’t worn it in a long time, and that’s probably my fault. I think the last time you wore it was the day we had that fight in the garage, when I told you it wasn’t my fault you didn’t like girls. And the sick, twisted irony of that is, in reality, I’m the one out of the two of us who doesn’t like girls. I don’t know. I’m getting all broody, as always, but you know me.

I know we haven’t played D&D in years, but I was hoping this could be the start of a new chapter, where we can just… take the time to be kids again. Plus, I’m certain that your shoulders could make even a wizard cloak look hot.

I’m not so sure if writing you a love letter while you’re asleep next to me at a sleepover was the best idea, because you just snored really, really loudly out of nowhere and scared the shit out of me. Dustin just woke up and is giving me a weird look. I’m gonna put my notebook away now.

Happy Birthday. Again.

Love,

Mike

-

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[angie-long-legs]

25. What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done to someone?

Spill the Tea ☕️

"Uh, killed 'em? Don't get much worse than that!"

In the gritty foundations of his soul, Angel knew this wasn't the right answer. That there was one thing that he would truly never forgive himself for, no matter how long he waited in his eternal punishment to feel the burden of it lift. Of course, Hell wasn't a place where your sins were to be forgotten - more so a place where your sins thrived, and your shameful mistakes weighed heavy on you, unrelenting, for the rest of all time.

"I mean... I guess I did some more... personal shit than just whackin' mobsters.

"I... hurt a friend a' mine. A good friend. Best friend I eva' had, actually. Knew eachotha' since before we could walk or talk or anythin' - she was the neighbours kid, and on our street, everybody knew everybody.

"We grew up togetha', always togetha'. She was... sweet. Quiet, but real goofy once ya got ta know her. Too nice fa her own good. Her mom and dad were neva' around, so when my dad was bein' an asshole I'd camp out at hers, waitin' out the storm, ya know? Or when her parents skipped town fa more than a few nights, she'd come ta mine and my mom would cook a big family dinner so she'd have somethin' ta eat.

"Everyone thought we'd wind up togetha'. My dad was always sayin', "Anthony, yer gonna marry that girl one day!". Told me I was a lucky guy ta have it all come so easily ta me.

"But, uh... gettin' olda', realisin' I was different... I was scared. 'Specially when I started foolin' around with guys, sneakin' out an' gettin' high with fellas way too old fa me. By the time I was eighteen an' had neva' went steady with a girl, my dad was... y'know. Makin' comments, sayin' he ain't havin' a fa.g unda' his roof, threatenin' ta kick me out... I was terrified a' gettin' found out. And... I ain't proud a' how I handled it.

"This girl, my best friend... well, she was inta me - everyone knew it. I, uh, tried ta ignore it, fa the most part. Acted like it wasn't happenin', like I didn't know. Then, one day, I'd had this crazy fight with my dad, I went ta go see her, and... she told me she loved me. And... I dunno, I was a mess, and- and I told her I loved her too. And I did, just... not in the way she wanted. I thought- I thought maybe I would if I just... tried to. Also, I wanted my dad off my back - and he was, like a fuckin' shot. Neva' seen him more proud a' me than when I told him we were goin' together, and I did a lot a' fucked up shit fa that man.

"Think we made it about three or four months before it all went tits up - not that it wasn't doomed from the get-go. I was... fuck, I was shitty. Never wanted ta be around her afta' we started seein' eachother, I felt... pissed every time she tried ta be romantic or whateva'. Like I'd lost a fuckin' friend. And I was still messin' around with guys, tellin' myself I'd quit it and be a good partner or some other bullshit that'd neva' happen. Worst part was she was fuckin' good ta me, the whole time, she was tryin' ta get me ta open up, but... I mean, what was I supposed tell her? That I was a closet queer, a junkie? Even the shit with my family, I dunno how much she actually knew... I couldn't tell her nothin' real.

"Eventually, I got caught out. I'll spare ya the details, but it wasn't pretty. She left and... I never saw her again. Never knew where she went, what happened ta her. But she ain't down here far as I can tell, so I like ta think she made somethin' of herself. Lived a good life. She was smart - a good kid like her, ain't no doubt in my mind she landed on her feet.

"But... yeah, I broke her fuckin' heart. I was selfish, I took advantage of her feelins fa me. I lost the only friend I ever trusted, and if I could change one thing I did up top, ain't no contest. I'd pick that every goddamn time."

[minnielvr]

ROSES - CHAPTER 28 : "take me back?" ──────────────────

y/n saw a notification pop up on her phone, so she picked it up and read the name of the sender, it was felix. as much as she hated him right now she really couldn't resist looking at the message. she unlocked her phone and opened the app, the message read:

"ik u hate me rn but come to the hill by ur fav restaurant at 7. please be there"

y/n had somewhat of an idea of what this meant, either he was going to talk to her and ask to at least be friends or ask for another chance, and she didn't know wether she was ready to make that decision or not. but she still decided to go because deep down she knew she loved him. a lot.

‿୨♡୧‿

so there she was, sitting in front of her vanity, the clock read 6:25 pm and she still had no idea of what to wear, and if she should do any makeup. so naturally, she called yunjin.

"hey y/n whats up??" yunjin answered the call and asked

"felixwantstomeetupwithmeandihavenoideawhattowearhelp" y/n said in one breath

"woah woah slow down there..what did you say?" yunjin clearly couldn't understand y/n's fast talking/mumbling.

"FELIX ASKED TO MEET UP AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO WEAR. please help" y/n was scared to look at yunjin through the phone screen

"HE WHAT?!?! NAH HE DOESN'T GET TO DO THAT RIGHT NOW" yunjin was furious at his behavior

"look yunjin i know how fucked up everything he did was and i understand how stupid thus is of me but i really love him and no matter how much i try convince my self that i hate him i really don't."

"oh...okay. well if your sure then" yunjin smiled, knowing y/n really loved him

yunjin guided y/n on what to wear, telling her if something was too dressy or too casual. also telling her that she should just do a light makeup look, to not make it look like she was trying too hard for him. just to let him know that she's not desperate.

the clock showed 6:45 and y/n realized she had to leave because she barely knew the directions to this place and it would take a while to get there. 'kinda stupid of him to not even send me directions while its night time' but she decided she could talk about that to him later, if things go good. so she thanked yunjin and hung up the phone, grabbed her purse, and left her apartment.

‿୨♡୧‿

to say that getting to the meeting was hard is an understatement. y/n was sure to yell at him for this. but the whole adventure was so worth it when she got there.

y/n was met with the sight of an arch with roses and vines wrapped around it, rose petals on the grass, candles everywhere, and then she saw him, never did y/n think that she would see THE lee felix of stray kids, with a ginormous bouquet in his hands and his eyes teary, all for her.

"felix?" y/n called out

felix looked up from where he was staring at his shoes and breathed a sigh of relief, she even saw a bit of a smile.

"y/n...you- actually came" he was suprised

y/n kicked the ground beneath her and said "well yea..i mean it would be kinda of rude if i didn't." she scoffed.

"NO. i-i mean..no. i would completely understand if you didn't show up, I was the one who was rude. i acted like such a dick, gosh i am so sorry. god you have no idea how fucking sorry i am. i have no idea what got into me. it's like all of a sudden i had someone controlling my mind or something, i just go so insecure and worried and i feel so stupid for that, i cant believe i trusted that bitch. i just thought that i wasn't enough for you and you were just with me out of pity or something. and i KNOW you wouldn't because thats not you. i feel so bad for calling you a whore, i just got in my own head and wanted to make you feel bad about yourself and i don't know why i would ever want that because i only what you to be happy. i only want you to feel loved and taken care of. so yes, i know i fucked up..REALLY bad. but i swear to god that if you just give me once more chance i will prove to you i'm not that type of guy. so please..take me back?"

───────────────────

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a/n : coooooooooolll with uuuuuuu😞

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[bandedbulbussnarfblat]

I had to ask my mom for money today. And ask my brother if we can transfer all the bills to his name, bc my mind feels like swiss cheese, and I just don't think I can manage it rn. We usually go halfsies on bills, but it's my bank account everything is under. So I was constantly having to put cash in the bank, then go online to pay bills, and I just can't. I can't handle it. I go back to my psychiatrist tomorrow, not that it fucking matters. I've been seeing her over a decade and I'm still fucked up. She prescribed me meds that made me worse. Like, the side effects were awful. And I've had to stop taking other meds before bc of the side effects. it all just feels so hopeless. i thought i was getting better for awhile, but that didn't last. I thought the TMS was gonna fix me, but now instead of sad I just fell scared all the time and that's so much worse. I can handle sad. I've been dealing with it my whole life. I was a sad, lonely kid. Then I made friends and it helped, but I was still depressed as a teenager. I was suicidal by 16; I literally only stayed alive through high school and college bc I had people that loved me who would feel bad if I was gone. Then there kept being reasons to put off, like my bff getting married and wanting me to be the maid of honor, and how I couldn't do it during her honeymoon bc that would kill the mood. And then my other best friend got married, then pregnant, and I couldn't do it then, bc what if the shock triggered a miscarriage or something? I've lived the first 25 years of my life just waiting to die. And the anxiety has always, always been there. The adhd too, and sometimes i hate my parents for not getting me the help i needed, just bc one doctor said i didn't have it after the school suggested testing. There was no actual testing, he dismissed it out of hand as my behavior just 'kids being kids'. He probably didn't believe adhd existed, bc he was old af and set in his ways. And kept prescribing meds that were no longer being made, bc the FDA found them unsafe. so i've always been fucked up. since i was a kid i felt like there was this wall of glass between me and the rest of the world. i could look inside and I could see it and hear it, but I never felt part of it. Like I was something else, this other thing that couldn't connect. And it's never went away. I still don't understand all of these unspoken rules everyone picks up on. I've spent so long, trying to contort myself into something not normal, but acceptable. Something people could love. So I default to being polite, and using the 'right' answers to get by. And keeping everyone at an arm's length. Bc the social anxiety I get from just having to talk to another person who isn't one of my people is so bad that I'll start shaking while talking to them, and become more and more uncomfortable until it's finally over and I go in the bathroom and cry. I don't know how to be vulnerable around people unless they already know and love me, or I'm on the internet where there's no connection to my government name, and no one i know irl will ever see it.

[shiplessoceans]

The finale of ted lasso was beautiful. Sod off if you didn't like it, I did.

This morning I woke up and got ready for my last day of work. I was made redundant in April. I have worked with these same crew of people since I was 25.

I'm 35 years old. This job represents a decade of my life and will always be a part of me. Not the work itself, fuck the work, but the people. The memories, things I learned from them, stories I have, experiences and lessons I never would have learned without them.

And today as I accepted the flowers they gave me, hugged them as they cried and told me to stay in touch, told me they'd miss having me around and followed me to my car to wave me off...

Cat Stevens was in my head singing "...and I know, that I have to go away. I know I have to go."

And I felt profoundly sad for Ted. So happy that he was back in Kansas where he felt truly at home. But so incredibly sad that in order to be home he had to leave the family he had built.

Ted has to be with his son. He could never have lived with himself if he had missed watching his son grow up. And while he made friends, Richmond was never Ted's home. He missed Kansas the entire time.

He had to go.

I love these people I work with but I have worked this job for long enough and redundancy or not, it is definitely time to move on.

It doesn't mean I won't miss them every day.

It doesn't mean I'm not scared to go.

Ted Lasso treated these characters as human beings from the very beginning. Flawed, imperfect, fully formed human beings and threw out the tired two-dimensional tropes.

Yes in a tropey sitcom Ted and Rebecca would have ended up together, Richmond would have won the whole thing, nate would never have betrayed Ted and never grown as a human being through his mistakes, Roy and Keeley would never have broken up, had a kid and Jamie Tartt would still have been a jerk... and Ted would have just continued to do Skype Christmas until Henry grew up or the show gradually wrote him out as though he never existed like the oldest Cunningham sibling on happy days.

Fuck. If that's the show you wanted, go watch every other sitcom ever.

People don't work like that. Nates positive treatment by Ted doesn't erase years of bullying and a crushing feeling of inadequacy instilled in him by his father. Ted's can-do, positive attitude comes at the cost of his ability to confront the difficult things in his life. The world isn't split up into good people and villains. We're all just humans doing our best and fucking up sometimes.

The second you decided you knew what the character arcs should be, you passed a judgement. A determination about the characters based on who they were at that moment.

And instead you should have been curious about where the characters ended up as they grew and changed, respecting that it may not be where you wanted them to end up, but that it's not your decision to make. Same as anyone in your life that you care about.

Be curious, not judgemental.

Thankyou Ted Lasso, and Fuck you for making me cry today.

[saberghatz]

1-70

OH MY GODODOD CRACKING MY KNUCKLES

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? YES PRETTY GOOD!!

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? My friends :')

03: Do you regret anything? Like a billion things that I won't get into here >:)

04: Are you insecure? Only on Fridays

05: What is your relationship status? SINGLE YEAAA BOIEEIEEEE

06: How do you want to die? In my sleep would be the most ideal tbh I'm down for that

07: What did you last eat? Ritz crackers and peanut butter;;.....

08: Played any sports? IN MY LIFE? YEA!! RECENTLY? UHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh

I hate playing on teams so I usually just fuck about on my own or with friends, you'll never catch me joining like actual sports teams again

09: Do you bite your nails? Surprisingly no o-o

10: When was your last physical fight? Too long ago. I'm really itching. SOMEONE PLEASE SPAR WITH ME

11: Do you like someone? I WISH I DID. FUCK.

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? HEEELL NAW I'M LIKE A GRANDMA WHEN IT COMES TO GOING TO BED EARLY (against my will, i am simply a tired bitch)

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Everyone except the people I don't hate

14: Do you miss someone? Deeply :D

15: Have any pets? I don't have any personally, but my mom has two kitties named Nikki and Tessie. When I go visit her, I get to see them too. She had them since before I moved away, so I still consider them kind of my cats :')

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Lonely enough to do this, but also happy enough to do this

17: Ever made out in the bathroom? I thought this said 'have you ever made it out of the bathroom' and I'm like honestly no my ibs could never

On that note, no but call me

18: Are you scared of spiders? No :(

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I'd go back to a time before I was born, definitely the 70s or 80s just to experience it for awhile.

But if I was limited to only going back in time during the years I was alive, no I would never go back. I feel like I've learned a lot over the years and I don't want to lose that progress

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Probably the airport

21: What are your plans for this weekend? MY ROOMMATE BLAIR HAS A CHOW CHOW PUPPY AND WE'RE TAKING HER TO A DOGGIE SOCIAL ON SATURDAY. Also maybe going to an art show/mall on Sunday.

22: Do you want to have kids? How many? Zero, have you seen the state of the world??

23: Do you have piercings? How many? I have ear piercings, but I think they closed up :// I REGRET LETTING THEM CLOSE

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? Like in school? That's a lifetime ago oh god Science

25: Do you miss anyone from your past? Yes almost everybody I've ever known, whether it ended on good or bad terms. I am simply a sentimental soul with a horrible memory

26: What are you craving right now? Making out with a stranger that I know

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? @_@;;;.... yea

28: Have you ever been cheated on? No

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? PROBABLY, I'M SORRY IF SO

30: What’s irritating you right now? Social media is grating on my fucking nerves, so much so that I'm weening off insta and twitter and I've ended up back here. Right here.

31: Does somebody love you? If so lemme know

32: What is your favourite color? Pink, white, gold

33: Do you have trust issues? Fortunately not

34: Who/what was your last dream about? I think I dreamed I was Percy Jackson and I was befriending some monsters instead of killing them.

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My roommate like literally yesterday :D

36: Do you give out second chances too easily? I'd give anyone a second chance, but I don't think I'd give a third chance.

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? I forgive because I don't hold grudges and then my memory is so rotten that I forget why I was mad in the first place

38: Is this year the best year of your life? ITS BARELY 2024 SO I CAN'T ANSWER YET

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 16 I think. Shout out to Solangelo

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? No but this made me realize I never have, and now I want to

51: Favourite food? I can't think of anything, so like I do at restaurant menus I'll default to chicken strips :)

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Yes 100%

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? shower, work on writing my fics, jerk off, draw, you decide what order

54: Is cheating ever okay? Never, unless your partner knows but then its not chEATING IS IT

55: Are you mean? Honestly maybe

56: How many people have you fist fought? Not enough (none. please. please spar with me I need to train)

57: Do you believe in true love? I believe some people believe in it and can find that for themselves. I hope I become one of them

58: Favourite weather? If I can't wear a bikini, I'm sad. But crisp Autumn mornings also hit like no other..

59: Do you like the snow? I love visiting the snow, I wouldn't want to live in the snow

60: Do you wanna get married? I haven't really thought about it lately. So currently, I guess not xD

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? Hell yea, but turn up the heat

62: What makes you happy? @hyenahijinks @yuuidflourite @comets-nix and drawing

63: Would you change your name? Some people call me Grace which I like a lot, it's my middle name tho

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? I'd totally do it, but I'd probably get that fist fight I've been begging for instead

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Been there done that, we over it and stronger than ever >:)

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? @hyenahijinks ILY bitch

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? @hyenahijinks

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? LOL MY MOM TODAY ACTUALLY

69: Do you believe in soulmates? ARE TRUE LOVE AND SOULMATES NOT THE SAME THING

70: Is there anyone you would die for? My friends and parents 100% but I'm also not like super attached to breathing to begin with so the decision would be very easy

THATS A HELL OF A WAY TO END AN ASK MEME THANK YOU FOR ASKING THESE HUMPHREY

[iviarellereads]

Wheel of Time full series spoiler thoughts on TDR 25-34

A probably semi-regular weekly bonus to my reread blog, since sometimes you realize things on reread that just make you need to yell in a full spoiler space.

Ha, he DID set up the hedgehog that gets Perrin and Faile later. That's adorable.

And also, Chesmal FUCKING Emry. She who might have been another Semirhage.

I believe the justification for Lanfear urging the girls on to Tear is that she wants Rand to be absolutely equipped to take out Be'lal and she might even expect Ishy. She believes she can handle Rand from there. Do you think she was right? What grade would you give her on the plan and the execution thereof?

Some of the visits while the girls are scrubbing DO seem obvious in nature, but what was Verin's game? She was always playing 12 dimensional chess even when she did the simplest thing…

Fun to see the Aiel trick of finding what you need in TAR, performed accidentally, a couple books before it's mentioned.

If this reread and really having to dig into more of the times that the characters, the three I named in my chapter 29 bit in particular, are lying to themselves or the reader… if this is how I start to not hate Mat's character, I'm gonna have to seriously consider quitting the fandom. (That's hyperbole and a lie, I have trouble hating Mat's character ever since the show made him a wet cat instead of a Han Solo.)

So many double, triple, quadruple fakeouts to make you doubt your opinion of anyone in this series. The Gray Man in Sheriam's bed… to what purpose? Was one of the Forsaken scaring her off the tasks assigned her by another? Was she trying to brush away suspicion on herself?

I do love that Laras gets shown to be actually really good later. Well, as good as one can be, working in a system like the White Tower. We get the line about her not being party to breaking a woman's spirit here, true, but she's still coming off as so strict and kinda hateful. Seeing everything she does later, helping Siuan and Leane to escape, and offering to help Egg, and I'm sure she knew more about Verin's request for sweet tea than either of them ever let on.

Good to see that Mat's roguishness still only holds charm for me if I apply his show backstory and characterization. I haven't fallen THAT far as to be a book-Mat fan yet. (I kid, I joke, I make funnies. Some of my good friends are Mat lovers. But I'm just not destined to join y'all.)

“Next you could try telling the Lord Captain Commander of the Whitecloaks he should marry the Amyrlin Seat.” Well it's not quite predicting what will happen in the end, but Egg is still very much caught up in the fantasy of being with Galad, so it made me grin anyway.

I don't particularly care for Gaul, really, I'm far more interested in what Bain and Chiad have going on, but hooray for a fan fave showing up. I do feel for everyone who mourned that this first appearance's show adaptation was changed to Aviendha. It's more important to establish her as one of the extremely core characters who actually really affects the plot later, but Gaul gets so little in the story besides lurking next to Perrin for the remaining 11 books, and they took away his intro. ;~;

I will not hear any Faile hate in the comments, though. My poor knife wife queen whose character was mostly assassinated by being only seen through Perrin's nose for her first six books.

[writing-with-emy]

My prompt-list #1

All my prompt lists in one place: 🪽🪽

#1 - "Is it still murder if I give them a heads up?" ; "That's called a threat." ; "Damn."

#2 - "Do you trust her?" ; "No.. but I trust her anger."

#3 - "We're lost." ; "No we aren't!" ; "Yes we are!" ; "No we aren't!" ; "Fine then - Mr./Ms. Navigator, where are we?" ; "Errr... uh, we are right here."

#4 - "I won't let you die." ; "I don't think that's how it works." ; "I am death, honey. I decide how it works."

#5 - Where is the Idiot, anyway?" ; "I'm right here." ; "Suprisingly enough, I'm not talking about you this time."

#6 - "How dare you! I... I trusted you! ; "Sweet, naive little girl/boy. Trust is for children. You, my dear, are a soldier."

#7 - "Your arm is bleeding." ; "Oh really? I hadn't noticed that half of my goddamned blood was flowing out of my arm, but thanks for letting me know."

#8 - "Are you sober?" ; "I'm moderately functional." ; "I'll take that as a no."

#9 - "What's our exit strategy?" ; "Our What?" ; "Oh my god, we're all going to die."

#10 - "Watch your mouth kid. You are one sentence away from starting a war."

#11 - "I- I can't stop it. I'm sorry..." ; "It's okay, it's okay. Just breathe. You don't have to be sorry for anything. I've got you."

#12. - "Don't tell me you haven't noticed the way they watch you, how they whisper when you appear. They think you're going to save them."

#13 - "You give out pieces of yourself to people but you never let them see the whole picture. I've seen it. I know who you are."

#14 - "Did you really not see it? Or were you too afraid to look?"

#15 - "If you do that again, I'll throw you out that fucking window you- what are you doing?" ; "Checking how high the drop is, see if it's worth it."

#16 - "Why are you staring at me like that?" ; "I think I just... finally understood you."

#17 - "You know I'll win.' ; "And you know I'll fight."

#18 - "Hey! Watch it! You're scaring her!" ; "ME scaring HER!?"

#19 - "I don't like saying 'I told you so', but-" ; "The hell you don't, it's you favorite phrase."

#20 - "Just because you are speaking in a different language, doesn't mean that I don't know when you are cursing me out."

#21 - "Did you get my note?" ; "Of course I got it. You taped it to my forehead while I was sleeping."

#22 - "You say you were my family. But where were you when I was hurt, when I needed someone, when I needed you? You weren't here, but they were. Always."

#23 - "I think I actually hate you." ; "Yeah I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that."

#24 - "You look very nice tonight, I love your-" ; "What do you want?"

#25 - "There's no Happy Ending to this right?" ; "Not really, no."

#26 - "Let this be a dream, I can't take it if it's reality."

#27 - "How on earth do you open a girl's diary lock?" ; "Trust me I got this, I had sisters growing up."

#28 - "It's okay to cry." I held their face in my hands. "It's okay."

#29 - "It's a long Story' ; "You convinced me into thinking you were dead for eleven months. I have time."

#30 - "I feel like I'm being stabbed." ; "How do you even know what it feels like to be stabbed."

#31 - "You are the worst human being on the face of planet earth." ; "Aw, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me."

#32 - "You are all remarkably well behaved tonight... What did you do?"

#33 - "You're not my favorite person today." ; "I'm not your favorite Person on any day."

#34 - "Just take a deep breath or something!" ; "TAKE A DEEP BREATH!? It feels like my insides are being RIPPED OUT!"

#35 - "What kind of noise was that?" ; "I sneezed." ; "That was NOT a sneeze."

#36 - "I hate you." ; "Why? I'm lovely."

#37 - "Bring them home. All of them." ; "But-" ; "All. Of. Them."

#38 - "Who are we to each other?" ; "You tell me."

#39 - "If you're going to break my heart, can we do it outside?" ; "But it's raining." ; "That way I can go all-in on my melodramatic movie moment."

#40 - "I don't want to look like a princess, I want to look like a formerly evil queen who reluctantly redeemed herself for the side of good." ; "You read too much." ; "Damn right I do."

#41 - "Why are you doing that?" ; "Doing what?" ; "Treating me like a person."

#42 - "I didn't think you were the type to lose your sanity for a girl." ; "I didn't either."

#43 - "I thought you said you knew how to get inside!?" ; "Yeah, well, that was a lie."

#44 - "Hold on, you died." ; "Yeah, well it didn't stick."

#45 - "You don't scare me. Your anger scares me."

#46 - "Hey! Those are mine!" ; "Not anymore!"

#47 - "Are you there?" ; "Physically, yes. Mentally is debatable."

#48 - "I mean, yeah, I didn't need my heart anyway. Who cares if it breaks."

#49 - "We can't just steal it!" ; "Of course not! We'll just borrow it for a little while... while they aren't looking."

#50 - "I'm really nervous." ; "Why's that." ; "...I've never danced before."

#51 - "You love her don't you?" ; "Was it that obvious?"

#52 - "Ten years of friendship and this is the treatment I get." ; "I met you yesterday!"

#53 - "Can I keep it?" ; "No." ; Pleeease!" ; "...fine."

#54 - "I was just kind of hoping that you'd, y'know... fall in love with me."

#55 - "What are you doing up at four in the morning?" ; "I might ask you the same thing."

#56 - "Don't get up, I'm comfortable like this."

#57 - "Why are your hands purple?" ; "That's a very good question."

#58 - "So what's your plan?" ; "My plan was to follow your plan!"

#59 - "This is the worst plan ever." ; "Why? Because I made it?" ; "Yes."

[italic-doing-random-shit]

all of them. unless you're uncomfortable with any

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?

only with my mom

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?

I last said I love you to panda

03: Do you regret anything?

yep, lots of things

04: Are you insecure?

hell yeah, plenty to not like about me but that’s the anxiety talking

05: What is your relationship status?

taken

06: How do you want to die?

quickly, calmly

07: What did you last eat?

hamburbur

08: Played any sports?

play soccer mainly, but dabbled around

09: Do you bite your nails?

unless I paint them, yes

10: When was your last physical fight?

fourth grade

11: Do you like someone?

yeah, I’m dating them

12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?

yep

13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?

I hate actions not people, unless the action is unjustifiable. So like, Israeli military and my dad

14: Do you miss someone?

I miss my moots in a way of ‘we never met but I want you here way’

15: Have any pets?

yep, always lived with dogs

16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?

really shitty

17: Ever made out in the bathroom?

nope, never even kissed someone

18: Are you scared of spiders?

nah, they’re little guys

19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?

nope, might get killed legally

20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?

haven’t yet

21: What are your plans for this weekend?

take a fucking break

22: Do you want to have kids? How many?

maybe, all I know is I want to adopt

23: Do you have piercings? How many?

none, but I want basic earibgs

24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?

anything art related or english

25: Do you miss anyone from your past?

no, I left them for a reason

26: What are you craving right now?

sleep and cuddles

27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?

yeah,,,,, I didn’t want to hurt them but I’m not going to date someone I don’t like back. It’s not fair.

28: Have you ever been cheated on?

nope

29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?

I believe so, but we were being sweet and it was a while ago

30: What’s irritating you right now?

school

31: Does somebody love you?

yes

32: What is your favourite color?

red

33: Do you have trust issues?

yes

34: Who/what was your last dream about?

Me, someone was trying to kill me

35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?

my teacher when asking for stock footage

36: Do you give out second chances too easily?

I think but also everyone deserves a new chance

37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?

forgive

38: Is this year the best year of your life?

don’t know, still growing

39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?

haven’t had one

40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?

when I was like one

51: Favourite food?

Cheese quesadillas

52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

yeah, why else would they happen

53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?

hug my mom

54: Is cheating ever okay?

only on tests that don’t matter much

55: Are you mean?

playfully mean

56: How many people have you fist fought?

three

57: Do you believe in true love?

yes

58: Favourite weather?

summer rain

59: Do you like the snow?

YES

60: Do you wanna get married?

yes

61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?

yeah, I love pet names

62: What makes you happy?

a lot of things

63: Would you change your name?

yes, I did

64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?

no? I kissed my mom on the check and I’ll do it again

65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

(well as a trans male) if I was single and liked them then maybe but usually I just say I’m not interested and run off embarrassed

66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?

not really

67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?

Inka

68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

my mom

69: Do you believe in soulmates?

yes

70: Is there anyone you would die for?

no, but there plenty of people I’d live for

[serickswrites]

Whumpmas In July Day 25

25. Share a sneak peek of something you’re working on!

Ok! So many things lol. But, I’m going to take this to mean BIG things. So here’s the latest chapter in giant WIP (Burnt Offerings) that I am working on. Bit of background for context: Mallory and Greg are related (by marriage) but also work together. Leo is the serial killer that Mallory caught (he tortured her for several weeks and is quite obsessed with her). 

Warnings: referenced murder, referenced death, trauma, trauma response

“I am not here to talk, Leo. I am here so you will tell me where she is.” Mallory’s voice was stronger, she sat up a little straighter in her seat.

“And why would I do that?” Leo cocked his head. “What have you ever done for me, Mallory?” He drew out each syllable in her name.

“I think you know what I have done for you.”

“And what’s that exactly?” He cocked his head and narrowed his eyes. “From where I’m sitting, you have only taken things from me. Never given.”

Greg could see Mallory freeze. Could see her not breathing. Hang on, kid. I’ll get you out of here. He opened his mouth to speak, but Mallory started talking first. “You’re right. I haven’t given you anything, Leo.” Greg could hear the sadness in her voice. Oh, kid.

“I haven’t given you anything. But you still took it all from me.”

“And what exactly did I take from you?” Leo leaned in close.

“Everything,” Mallory said, voice heavy with sorrow. “You took everything from me.”

Leo smiled as she spoke. “And for that, my Mallory, I let you live.”

“Yours,” Mallory whispered as she dropped her head.

Greg opened his mouth once again, ready to end this visit, when Leo looked up at him. “I see newby isn’t here today. I take it he’s in the field waiting for directions?”

Greg nodded, not trusting his voice. I will make your life miserable. I will end these visits. You can’t hurt her anymore. Hold on, kid. I’ve got you.

“Tell him to go to Prospect Park. Near the arch. He’ll find them there.” He turned his attention back to Mallory. “Don’t forget, Mallory. Never forget. I let you live. I let you have that gift. I could have just as easily taken your life. But I gave you the gift of life. And of memory.”

Greg tapped on the window behind him before he grabbed Mallory by the shoulder. He pulled her out of the chair and from the room to the sound of Leo’s laughter. Greg pulled her into a tight hug as they stood in the hallway. Mallory clutched at his sweater as she sobbed. Oh, kid. I am so sorry. This was my fault. I didn’t help you. Didn’t intervene. Please forgive me. God, Mal.

By the time Greg was back on the highway driving, Mallory had stopped crying. She was twirling the water bottle in her hand as she stared out the window. “Mal, come home with me. I can call Papa and he can come home early.”

“It’s ok, Dad. I’m fine. I’ll just nap at home and head back—“

“You’re not going back to work today, kid.”

She turned to face him. “Wyatt stayed back to run down leads. We are getting closer. I need to be there!”

“You need to take care of yourself today. That was,” he searched for the words. I don’t want to scare you. To make you feel bad. But that was difficult to hear.

“No worse than any other time,” she said sharply. “This is what visiting him does.”

“Then maybe we can take a break.”

“No,” Mallory turned away again. “No. The victims need this.”

“Not badly enough to set yourself on fire every two weeks, Mal.”

“I’m not setting myself on fire.”

“You are. You are, Mal. And I’m giving you the fucking lighter. How can you not see how this is hurting you?”

“I do see.” Mallory looked down at her hands.

“That’s even worse! I can’t let you keep doing this. What kind of boss, what kind of father, would that make me?”

“I have to, Dad. Talking to Leo,” she paused thoughtfully. “Talking to Leo is the only way I am going to find her. And it’s the only way I can let go of what happened.”

Greg was silent. I don’t agree. I can’t let you hurt yourself. I need to protect you, kid. Help you heal. I love you, kid. I’ve got you. Always. “There are other ways.”

She shook her head and laughed, a melancholic hollow sound. “If there were, I’d be doing them. You know that. This is the only way.”

“Mal—“

“It’s true. You know it. And he knows it. It’s why he isn’t giving me information on where he put her. Because he knows once he does,” her breath caught, “I won’t go back. I will be done with him. Forever.”

Forever cannot come soon enough. “You know I’ll go with you. Every time.”

She looked up and gave him a wan smile. “I know, Dad. Thank you.”

I’ll always be there for you, kid. You don’t even need to ask. I’ve got you, kid. I’ll always have you.

[loveoaths]

writing log: 2021 + 2022

a recent conversation with a good friend made me realize: holy shit, i struggle to acknowledge my accomplishments, especially the creative ones. so i decided to start doing a yearly writing recap to log what work i've done, contextualize the environment i did that work in, and take a moment to just sit back and appreciate how i spent my year. this is the first time i'm doing this, so i'll be combining 2021 and 2022.

in 2021, i...

...got headfucked by illness, but kept writing.

this is not one of those "inspirational disability" things. long covid is the worst thing that's ever happened to me, physically and mentally, and that's saying something. i spent a solid two months not being able to walk, let alone think, and it took three more months for me to be able to read for longer than a few minutes at a time. at one point, my sixty-something year old mother had to hold me up so i could walk a lap around the block that i had been running months prior, and it was a super dark time. i am proud of myself for fighting for my health, advocating for humane treatment, and re-learning how to find solace and comfort and reprieve in reading and writing. i was recuperating in bed most of 2021 (when i wasn't struggling to keep my job lol) so i had a lot of time to come up with project ideas but zero stamina to finish them. i'm still not recovered, and have new chronic illnesses out the wazoo now, but i'm in a much better place these days.

...worked on 21 scripts.

includes new and old projects. my brain was scattered, but i tried.

...developed 12 new project premises.

some are good, others are dogshit. but who cares!

...finished 5 scripts.

three half-hour scripts, and two elevens. combined, that's almost two episodes of prestige television. i'm coming for your ass, tony gilroy!!!

...read 25 books.

comic books, ya novels, non-fiction, autobiographies, picture books; you name it, i read it. most of what i read went in one ear and out the other because of the covid brain damage, but i remember how soothing the act of reading a book while curled up with hot tea under a warm blanket was to my aching brain and body, and i'm glad i tried my best to read even if i knew i could barely understand. a third of this list is picture books and/or middle grade books and graphic novels because that's all i could handle at the beginning of the year. and you know what i found? a lot of those kids books are great, and heart-warming, and delightfully more nuanced than i had ever dreamed. the kids are gonna be alright.

...took 6 writing classes.

i'm glad i did this, but looking back on it this was kind of stupid. my brain was burdened by illness and my response was to... burden it more? for fun??? insane behavior. i highly recommend every course i took (chris amick's pilot development, multiple classes at writing pad, rad sechrist's project tv writing class, patricia villanuvella's 11-minute episode format class, and more) but i do not recommend taking them while your head is fucked. if anyone is interested in learning more about these courses, let me know!

...took on my first pitch project.

i was hired to help write and pitch a kids show, and learned a lot about the pitching process. mostly i learned that an upbeat attitude and a corny joke or two will go a long way. also, that the tv industry is an ouroboric cesspool constantly feeding on its own shit, but i digress.

...developed my first original show pitch.

it's uglier than sin but i love it. developing the pitch actually made me realize the concept is better as a novel series than a show, but i appreciate how much that process taught me about exploring format, structure, and the art of pitching.

...landed my first staff writing gig.

this was my proudest moment. in between numerous ER visits, doctor's appointments, health scares, housing issues, and more, i broke into the industry i love.

in 2022, i...

...was still pretty fucking sick, but doing better.

title says it all. despite losing my emotional support animal to leukemia, i hung in there. feels good.

...took on three writing mentees.

this is still the most shocking thing i did last year. i became a mentor to three fellow brown folks and i love them all dearly. i don't know if i'm a stellar mentor or anything, but i would do just about anything to help them reach their writing goals. i always thought i hated teaching, but it turns out i really enjoy working one-on-one with people as a guide rather than an instructor. my goal is to help all of my mentees break into their respective industries in the next two years.

...took three writing classes.

at this point i'm mostly taking these to meet people and learn new tips and tricks, but i still found them highly rewarding. plus, i realized i work best when i know someone expects to read what i've written the following week. nothing makes you keep a writing deadline like the pain of disappointing a peer! :D

...wrote 63,207 words for work.

i worked two staff writer gigs and seven freelance or contract gigs, and wrote more in a year than i ever have, ever. i know this number isn't high to prose writers, but a 25 page script is around 4,800 to 5,000 words. that's a lot of pages.

in total, i wrote around 22 scripts for work last year.

...wrote 50,018 words for original projects.

i only finished three scripts, and most definitely did not hit my goal of finishing my feature script, but i still finished. all three projects were complex, adult-oriented, and of personal significance to me, and it felt really good to finally finish them. i don't love all of them, honestly, but one of them got me my current manager and generated some buzz around my name that kept me employed, so i'm incredibly appreciative of the work i put into them, and the work they've given me in return.

...read 50 books.

this is my crowning achievement of 2022! i used to be an avid reader and then stopped out of nowhere for several years, but last year i fell back in love with reading, big time. i am proud to say that after a year of re-cultivating my reading comprehension and attention span, i can once again knock out a 300 page book in a day (with some assistance from my good ol' friend, hyperfixation). coaxing myself to just read five pages a day really helped me with some of the executive function issues of not wanting to pick up a book. if you're struggling with reading habits, i really recommend lowering your bar to entry. read for a minute, or read one page, or even just one paragraph. eventually the habit will reform and you'll be back to reading longer.

...wrote 51 loglines.

i struggled to come up with new, creative ideas in 2021, so this jump from 12 to 51 was startling, but highly satisfying. once i stopped worrying about whether the ideas were good, i was able to do more with the freeness that comes with happily being shit at something. and you know what? once i got the shit ideas out, i found a couple of really good ones at the bottom of the barrel.

...had a pretty alright year.

shit still went sideways, i was overworked and exhausted, and my personal life imploded, but looking back on it, i had a lot to be grateful for, and a lot of love and support in my corner, and i'm going to try to be mindful and thankful for the aforementioned as i push myself a teensy bit further in 2023.

...have a few goals for 2023.

they are:

work less, read more

write more indulgent stuff (gay porn, fic, all the nasty dark shit i like)

eat more veggies

do some fucking wrist exercises and get a desk pedaler because holy shit my joints are aging like MILK

thanks for reading.

[shepardlives]

*slams buzzer* Abby for all them!!!!

1. Canon I outright reject

That he does not exist and I cannot kiss him

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

Abby is a big ol cat so expect cat behaviors

3. Obscure headcanon

Abby has to resist the urge to groom people constantly. He just loves his friends

4. Favorite line

“Nya :3c”

5. Best personality trait

Abby is very loyal, even if he can be aloof

6. Worst personality trait

Abby is very quick to cut and run because of his past, so it’s a lot of work to gain his trust and make him stick around

7. Age/height/weight headcanon

Abby is around 37, 7 feet even, and around 300 pounds

8. Unpopular opinion about them

The best love interest for Genji don’t @ me

9. Scene that first made me love (or hate) the

character

He popped into my brain because I was tired of Genji/l*cio

10. Best moment on screen (or in the book)

All :)

11. Faceclaim for the role

God I had a face claim but I can’t FIND IT if I find him I’ll edit this

12. Crack headcanon

Abby has a rough tongue like a cat but only Sometimes

13. Dumbest thing they've ever done

Genji

14. Most heroic moment

Abby has worked with overwatch to save a lot of people but he’s very proud of the times he’s saved kids

15. Worst thing they've ever done

He’s killed a lot of his fellow preds, either in the lab or because they couldn’t be saved… it still weighs on him

16. Deepest darkest secret they won't even admit

He doesn’t know that he wanted to be saved. It might have been better if he’d gone crazy and someone put a bullet in him

17. Quotes. sonas. poems. etc. that | associate

“Not a man like you”

18. What they'd go to see a therapist about

Probably the massive amount of mental and physical abuse they went through while being experimented on or the feelings of non-personhood

19. Vices/bad habits

Abby tends to smoke or scratch at his clothing when he’s nervous so he goes through a lot of clothes

20. Scars

Many

21. Drink of choice (not just alcoholic)

Abby likes iced mochas a lot. Usually this is just him adding chocolate milk to his coffee

22. Best physical feature

His muscles :^)

23. If they were a scented candle, what would

they smell like?

Chocolate, firewood, and tiger lilies

24. Most annoying habit

Abby doesn’t exactly keep normal sleeping hours

25. 3 things they'd want to take with them if they

were dropped off in the middle of nowhere

Abby actually struggles with the idea of keeping anything thanks to his upbringing- he’d keep a weapon but that’s about it

26. What they would do if stuck in an elevator

with insert character of your choice from the

same fandom]

If it were Cole, probably play cards. If it were Genji well. Depends on how long they were stuck

27. Their guilty pleasure

Abby loves reality tv. It’s terrible but he can’t stop watching

28. How they feel about insert character of your

choice from the same fandom]

Abby actually feels a lot of pity for reaper. He knows how that much anger and hurt can eat you alive

29. Eating habits

Abby is a fucking trash can and will eat whatever you give him. He’s very polite and won’t ask for seconds but he could very easily eat three plates of food

30. Sleeping habits

Abby sleeps very lightly and at all hours of the day. If he ever goes missing it’s most likely he’s found a quiet spot to take a cat nap

31. If the had a tumblr what would it look like?

Abby is very interested in robotics and other technological advances. He’d have a big STEM themed blog. Also lots of pictures of fish around lunch and dinner time

32. Something guaranteed to make them smile/

laugh

Abby loves terrible jokes: Reyes always got a laugh out of him when they were on missions

33. Something guaranteed to make them cry

Abby is pretty well regulated there so it takes a lot- but talking about his old family does the trick, always

34. How they react when they are feeling X

emotion (sad, angry, excited, scared, etc.-can

specify as many as you like)

Abby is very cautious- he’s big, he’s black, and he’s clearly not all the way human, so his emotions have to be regulated- but when he’s angry he’s furious. He tends to lose himself in it and the results are usually bloody

35. Their idea of a perfect day

Cat nap in the sun, a good workout/wrestle session with whatever tank is around, a hearty lunch, a walk/date with Genji, a good meal for dinner, and then cuddling until Genji falls asleep (zoomies at 3 am)

36. Their favorite season

Abby loves winter

37. What they really think about themselves

Abby thinks… he is an anomaly in a world that doesn’t always take kindly to those. He didn’t deserve what happened to him, but he wants a place in this world.

38. Favorite holiday

Christmas!

39. Favorite game

Abby isn’t much of a gamer but he usually tunes into Hana’s streams to see what’s up. He’d really like stardew valley if he tried it

40. Favorite book

As intelligent as he is Abby isn’t a huge reader. He liked the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe though

41. If they could have lunch with anyone in the

world (living or dead, from any fictional universe

or the real world), who would it be?

His mom

42. 3 comfort items

Sunbeams, hoodies, and a stress ball Zenyatta gave him

43. 3 favorite foods and 3 they despise

Abby is a trash can as mentioned but he doesn’t like cucumber. Salmon is his favorite fish

44. Their happiest memory

Meeting Genji

45. Their favorite celebrity

Hana Song

46. The person they most admire

Genji, for finding peace and acceptance in what he’s been made into

47. Their dream job

Abby would love to be a kindergarten teacher

48. Scariest moment of their life

See: his whole childhood in the lab

49. Favorite toy as a child

There was a desk in his room he played pretend with

50. A memory they've blocked out

Some of the more violent experiments, especially at first. Growing his tiger features (ears, tail, claws) weren’t exactly painless experiments

[jupio]

tl;dr my uni house sucks absolute fucking ass and its been building but one things happened today and it has. tipped me over the edge. so its either write it out or scream

i just want. one fucking week in this house where noone does anything that makes me want to beat the shit out of them

we had a couple silverfish earlier this week so i put my houseplants on a window sill in the shared hall outside my room because of the damp. this was 4 days ago and i havent watered them since so they should be bone dry. 

last night i went to bed first but the other people who live here decided to stay up and get drunk

i got my plants back in today because there havent been anymore silverfish and went to water and prune them but when i leant in closer to the first one i noticed two things. 

1. the soil was soaked through and messy 2. it fucking stank of piss

so yknow i dont want to jump to conclusions but what other fucking conclusions are there here. someone in this god fucking awful house thought it would be funny to take one of my plants and piss in it for fucking what??? for the laughs???

theyve poured wine on my dishes, they broke my kitchen scales, theyve screamed and tried to break and kick in my door at 4 in the morning when high on ket, theyve made fun of me to my face, theyve made fun of my hobbies, they make snide comments where i can tell i’m being made fun of but i cant work out what i’ve said wrong, theyve slammed doors at every hour of the fucking night for weeks, they scream up and down the stairs at 3am, they call me boring, they call me stupid and autistic and unfunny and bitchy and nit-picky and overly sensitive and i am so fucking SICK of trying to live here

every day i am masking so hard that i’m even more irritable and i go to bed exhausted and full of anxiety because i know!! i know everytime i leave a room they all look at each other like oh thank god ollie’s gone we can finally be offensive and i’m not sleeping properly, and i’m always on edge in my own home. i cant relax here ever

and idk. someone else might take this less seriously and brush it off. but i cant and i’m tired of trying to explain to them that maybe its funny to prank each other but when you fuck with my stuff it’s not funny, it completely derails my expectations of things and especially with adhd my reactions to things can be out of proportion. so its not funny at all. im just so angry that im shaking and i want to beat the shit out of someone. so no, i dont take well to it, and im not gonna laugh and deal with it, im gonna cry, and react like a kid. and then noone is having any fun because everyone acts like its so awkward that im upset when really they could just be normal fucking decent people and leave me the hell alone.

and now i have to try and deal with this and i have no fucking clue how im even meant to approach it. “hi guys, just wondering who pissed in my beloved trailing ivy? it was £25 so would love some financial compensation and also for you to hold still so i can break your fucking nose!” 

i dont even know if i should just leave it because its just not worth it. i dont even care if im a pushover at this point i am so. tired. of trying to make them respect me as a person. thats what it feels like, it feels like they dont even see me as a person they just see me as a fucking circus freak.

the plants still in my room. i dont even know what to do with that. i dont want to touch it because just touching the pot made my hands smell. so just everytime i look up i get upset and scared and angry all over again because its right there. and im 90% sure i know who did it but if i confront him about it he’ll do that thing where people go cmon its just a joke why are you being so sensitive? jeez, lighten up its not a big deal and ill look stupid and sensitive and different like i always do

ive got 4 more months of living here and then i am fucking gone and i am never speaking to these people again. 

[xdeusxmachinax]

I posted 1,362 times in 2022

219 posts created (16%)

1,143 posts reblogged (84%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@theoldandnewfirm

@bl00dw1tch

@katanamasako

@goldenokamigirl94

I tagged 68 of my posts in 2022

#apple - 6 posts

#lemon - 2 posts

#nope spoilers - 2 posts

#nope - 2 posts

#this sparks joy - 2 posts

#i love this nerd - 1 post

#why does thsi hour exists - 1 post

#seriously tho i'm okay just - 1 post

#likewise! - 1 post

#spoilers - 1 post

Longest Tag: 125 characters

#not taking part but i'm sitting in my lawn chair sipping a drink and watching the kids run around and play and its delightful

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Hey! I have a shy friend. Please reblog this to help me find artists who would do NSFW Trollhunters commissions!

41 notes - Posted April 26, 2022

#4

qhy do you hate morando?

There's just so little personality to him beyond 'Evil Meanie.'

He and Gunmar kill thier own guys. But when Gunmar does it, it's a loss of Temper, he's out of control, losing it.

When Morando does it, he's just 'haha heeehee you're of no use to me.'

It's not the Morando is BAD I just wish we would've gotten more out of him. I also think its a fucking SIN they wrote him as being responsible for the massacre of Varvatos family instead of DARING to allow the heros parents to be politcally grey. He's not a bad character, he was just written badly.

44 notes - Posted September 25, 2022

#3

Youtube wouldn’t let me upload so here we go. Anyone else remember this meme?

53 notes - Posted April 17, 2022

#2

Russian citizens on tumblr aren’t the enemy.

Putin is the enemy.

Corrupt people in power are the enemy.

You do NOT go into the fandom blogs of people who happen to be Russian and tell them you can’t be friends with them anymore simply because they’re Russian.

The Citizens don’t get a say in this. Or a voice. The people we share fandoms with aren’t to blame for this, and I know. I know it hurts to see Ukraine suffering, I know we feel powerless to help, so we lash out. We lash out at people we see as the enemy because it drives us crazy that we can’t do anything. That the world feels so out of control. 

But Ukraine will prevail. Good will Prevail.

And punishing Russian tumblr-users is just punching down. Russian artists have been cut off from paypal, from accurate news, they’re scared and they aren’t hurting anyone. They’re still our friends. Support Ukraine. Stand with Ukraine!

But do not treat our friends and artists badly because of their nationality. 

73 notes - Posted February 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Some of Stricklander’s ‘monstrous’ characteristics that don’t get discussed enough. Thing’s he’s absolutely noticed and might be self-conscious about.

-His mouth is actually just a bit larger than it should be, it goes up too high in the corners when he’s aggressively smiling.

-His arms are longer than average, long limbs are often associated with cryptids and monsters, such as Wendigo, The Rake, ect

-Yellow eyes and slitted pupils. Good guys don’t have snake eyes. ‘yellow’ is not a ‘good’ color. Poetry is not written about yellow eyes. And nothing with pupils like that is seen as decent or honest.

-Fangs. He can’t cover them completely with his lips. They aren’t the elegant incisors of a vampire or incubus, they are tearing, rending teeth of a carnivore.

-Wings. While I’m sure he loves his wings, does he ever with they had a few lines of silken fur, to soften the ruggedness? Does he ever imagine himself in steel-gray feathers, instead of the leathery look of a vulture troll?

Just, all the things we find beautiful. Does he accept them, or do they give him dysphoria, does he recognize the face in the mirror when it isn’t Walter’s?

77 notes - Posted April 16, 2022

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