#My dumbass NIN posting
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akirenhell · 5 months ago
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Why do they look like a group of cats that got caught eating something they shouldn't have?
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spadecentral · 4 months ago
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🍪 Bet On the Teleportation | Ace Trappola & Deuce Spade
>> event: race for the cookie cup by @theolivetree123 >> a/n: i got so excited to write this and now im scared to post it, but also this fan event is so cool yall should go check it out!!!
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>> masterlist: twst >> summary: bets are stupid, but ace and deuce make one anyway >> reader prns: they/them >> warning(s): you are referred to as [name]
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When the eight of you land inside the video game that Ace and Deuce were just competing over, you sigh. It's a nightmare already to keep Grim from eating anything, but now with the giant candies it's going to be hellish.
"What did you do, Juice?" Ace is peeved at Deuce, despite neither of them doing anything to trigger this kind of glitch.
Idia shivers momentarily, but you think it's just a cold front running down his spine and disregard it.
"There is no way you're gonna blame this on me!" Deuce responds. "If anything, you did it! Did you see how hard you were gripping the joystick?"
"No I didn't, because all I could see was my racecar ahead of yours!"
"[Name], what do you think?" Ace huffs, turning over to you for an answer.
"Nuh uh," you say as you grip tightly onto Grim's wiggling body. "You two aren't dragging me into this, I told y'all not to make that bet."
"Okay your opinion is void now," Ace rolls his eyes.
"Stop looking for pity points when you know I'm right," Deuce crosses his arms. "And I was beating you, not the other way around."
"Mhm, that's not what the pixels on that stupid screen were showing me," Ace retaliates, the sass in his voice unimaginable.
"Can you two please make up so we can get out of here," you groan.
"There's no way I'm making up with the person who got us here!" Deuce frowned.
"I am not gonna just reconcile with this dumbass!" Ace practically shouted.
"There has to be a way for the two of you to duke it out here so we can get on with it," Silver finally speaks up, over the initial stupor of teleportation.
All of the sudden, horns sound.
"All rise for our ruler, King Candy!" a guard yelled.
Finally looking anywhere other than the red- and blue-haired boys, you finally take in your surroundings and clothes fully. Racing attire? you question to yourself as a royal-looking man comes into view.
"Strange people of far-away lands!" he yells out. "I hear your need for justice and wish to hand it to you. Your need for a true winner resounds well in my heart, and I therefore grant you my honor in racing to victory! You may gather two teams—since there are so many of you—and compete in a race! Then you will know who the real winner is!"
"See, there we go," Ace says.
"There is no way..." you can hear Idia mumbling in the back.
"Alright! Let's get to it!" Deuce calls out, his signature smirk plastered on his face.
You frown, knowing the competitive nature of the both of them would probably do more hurt than good in the the long run. But who are you to stop them, they're teenage boys for Seven's sakes.
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>> ace and deuce taglist: @tulipluvlettr | @strawberry-hyacinth | @oseathepebble | @wisteriainslumber
@villaim | @pastelmages | @xphantasmagoriax | @atlasnessie-archived | @divinesapph
@ze-maki-nin | @ezr4n | @l1vyatan | @savanaclaw1996 | @enigmatic-pers
@queerlordsimon | @kyraxiyn | @rayisalive | @monochromepalette | @she-wont-miss
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mixelation · 10 months ago
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wait, okay, some thoughts on the wave mission in toxicity (reborn au au)
wave takes place far enough post Cave Incident that tori and obito are dating, but it's new. obito is currently on everyone's shit lists
however. obito is also 1) able to teleport, 2) crazy strong, 3) still dedicated to making sure kakashi stays alive, 4) presumably also cares about naruto and sasuke being alive and well, and 5) even if points 3 and 4 didn't stand, minato is reasonably confident he'll follow direct orders even if he might also go and do... other things.
minato sends obito instead of tori as back up. like he's mad at him but also obito is both able to and motivated to keep any random a-rank missing-nin at bay.
obito doesn't immediately go "i will kill gato" but he does go "i will simply stick my fingers into everything immediately."
so obito goes off while kakashi is passed out, bothers zabuza and haku, bothers gato and finds kakuzu and hidan and bothers them, and then he come back and is like. so guess what there's a ton of dangerous guys in the area!!! and i have pissed them all off
kakashi has just woken up and he's like. "why are you a waking nightmare, obito"
and if it weren't akatsuki specifically, obito would be fine with just murdering all the missing-nin. but it IS akatsuki and he would RATHER them stay alive, but also he can't let team 7 get hurt?? conundrum
obito: okay so this situation just got real delicate
kakashi: BECAUSE YOU ACTED LIKE AN ANNOYING DUMBASS
obito: i'm bringing in tori
kakasi: SHE WILL MAKE IT WORSE. SHE MAKES YOU WORSE. I REFUSE TO SEE BOTH OF YOU TOGETHER
obito: but she's so good at finessing stupid situations :<
obito: especially stupid situations that i made :< :<
kakashi: (inhuman noises)
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mlobsters · 9 months ago
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supernatural s15e3 the rupture (w. robert berens)
can't believe we're still doing this dumbass hell ghost plotline.
this music is awful. is generic and nonsensical to the vibe of the show. it's giving like. in line for space mountain plus 20 year old video game? sigh! (jay gruska, to no one's surprise)
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very pretty shot. painting-like
DEAN I mean, this whole mess, you know? This – This sloppy-ass ghostpocalypse – that's Chuck's ending? No. No, I don't think so. After everything that he has put us through? I'll be damned if I'm gonna let some glorified fanboy get the last word.
sloppy-ass indeed
BELPHEGOR It's just a nickname. Doesn't matter. Thing's actually more of a horn. Anyways, when Lilith began sending demons off to Earth to do her bidding, there was a little problem. I mean, yeah, she commended absolute loyalty in Hell, but there was no guarantee that once her minions were topside, that they wouldn't just take advantage of the situation. She needed to control her flock. So —
sure, why not! make up some extra lilith lore
ROWENA A few ingredients, nothing too exotic – lavender, myrrh, the skull of an owl, quiet to perform the spell, and an assistant. Dibs on Samuel. SAM Er, what? ROWENA You're as close to a seasoned witch as we've got in this lot.
team witch!sam
BELPHEGOR I want protection. Muscle. DEAN Yeah, Cas'll go. DEAN You've been to Hell before. CASTIEL Well, it sounds like I don't have a choice. DEAN Good. Great. Go team.
way to be an ass, dean. but also, who else is gonna do it? they're out of people? so we're just gonna make up some hurt/drama.
LOL ripped out ketch's heart? okay. i was never engaged with his little character rehab project so, whatever.
BELPHEGOR You know, your part in all this is, uh, pretty dangerous. I mean, you could die, get trapped in Hell. Your friends might never see you again. Funny, 'cause, uh, they didn't seem to think twice about it.
don't worry, cas. this is all fucking nonsense
BELPHEGOR Okay, you got me. I wanted company. I wanted your company. What? Shouldn't we at least try and be friends? Sam and Dean, they seem to be coming around. I think I'm, uh, growing on them. You know, like a cancer. CASTIEL You are not growing on anyone. Sam and Dean are just using you. Don't mistake that for caring about you, because I can assure you they don't. BELPHEGOR Wow. You learn that the hard way?
really going for the jugular of insecurities here
BELPHEGOR What is it, Cas, really? This, uh, seething animosity.
LOL it's like the nin lyrics to terrible lie!! (pretty hate machine is one of my all-time favorite albums, all bangers no skips)
(Hey God!) Why are you doing this to me? Am I not living up to what I'm supposed to be? Why am I seething with this animosity? (Hey God!) I think you owe me a great big apology
very plotline appropriate too haha
so is this when we find out what angle this demon is working or? LOL sucking up the hell souls with his little horn so he can become god. just like cas and the purgatory souls! like father, like son. dropping characters like flies, this episode
so rowena is going to sacrifice herself like crowley did? i like rowena, but i never was on board with her sudden character flip flop, same with crowley or ketch. gonna take dark to gray characters and oh yeah, we love the good guys now too and we're willing to die for the cause. i think we've had more time to attach to rowena post-flipflop at least? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
i was getting this clip for the bad music but dean's increasingly confused and stunned what??s made me laugh
i mean, whatever, man. this doesn't seem like the clearest case of prophecy but whatever, it works, sure. god, the music for this is AWFUL. i usually laugh off jay's bad music but this is insulting to rowena. she deserves better death music :p
well. rowena also got a little swan song diving into the pit moment.
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dean asks how he's doing, deflect deflect. the winchester way
DEAN We did it, though, man. It's over. God threw one last apocalypse at us, and we beat it. SAM Yeah. DEAN What you did… Rowena… You didn't have a choice. SAM I know.
how very madison
CASTIEL The plan changed, Dean. Something went wrong. You know this. Something always goes wrong. DEAN Yeah, why does that something always seem to be you?
jesus, dean. that's way nastier than necessary. he can get so mean when he's upset
CASTIEL You used to trust me, give me the benefit of the doubt. Now you can barely look at me. My powers are failing, and – and I've tried to talk to you, over and over, and you just don't want to hear it. You don't care. I'm… dead to you. You still blame me for Mary.
powers failing? wha? ok. when sam and dean talked, they were taking some of the responsibility for not dealing with soulless!jack better, not just only blaming cas? this is a very dramatic breakup situation that i was not expecting
CASTIEL Well, I don't think there's anything left to say. DEAN Where you going? CASTIEL Jack's dead. Chuck's gone. You and Sam have each other. I think it's time for me to move on.
death of a child messes everything up, i get that. but this conflict between dean and cas about mary feels artificially amplified. forever my beef with how they did the friendship between cas and dean
on the wiki:
Part of the music known as "Americana" or the Winchester Family Theme by Jay Gruska, plays as Castiel tells Dean he is leaving.
LOL oh my god the mushy music (see my extensive tag entries 🥴) has a name! i mean, duh, of course it has a name. but i never have bothered to look into the original score soundtracks. and the original score basically never got talked about on the wiki in the episode pages until maybe the last season or so would mention the composer. i just think it's hilarious. i kind of, true to my desire to consume this show semi-in a bubble, have avoided looking into the music too much because i'm just absorbing and observing as i go (and bitching, so much bitching)
first time i noticed it was 8x16, when dean was praying to cas to look out for sam because he was clearly getting hurt in the trials
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edensrose · 3 years ago
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Hi! First of all i want to say that you are an amazing writer and i find myself enchanced with your work. But besides that.
How do you think Mairon, Legolas and Thranduil like to be called by their s/o and what nicknames they give their s/o? <3
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ʚ pairing : thranduil, legolas, mairon / reader
ʚ summary : nicknames that they call their lover and enjoy being called
ʚ note : tsym <3 I have a thing for nicknames so this was definitely self indulgent hehe
( masterlist ) ( taglist form )
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ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤTHRANDUIL 
ʚ He enjoys being called: “aran nin/my king,” “meleth/love” and, even though he won’t admit he likes it when you shorten his name and call him “thran” 
ʚ The nicknames he calls you include: “mire nin/my tressure,” “elenath nin/my stars,” “my queen” and “pin aras/little deer”
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ LEGOLAS 
ʚ He is a simple elf, he loves it when you call him “leggie” or an affectionate sindarin name like “meleth nin’’
ʚ Has a plethora of nicknames for you, such as: “darling”, “loth nin/my flower”, “meleth nin/my love’’ and “dail/beautiful’’
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ
ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤMAIRON 
ʚ He’s not really one for being called names, but he has a soft spot for the names: “mai” and, to feed his ego: “tar-mairon’’
ʚ Pre-corruption Mairon would call you “my ithir” meaning “my light” in valarin. Post-corruption Mairon would call you things like “pup”, “doll”, “kautur/squirrel” and “mine”
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taglist ━ @kiatheinsomniac @augustwithquills @blueberryrock @a-chaotic-dumbass @m-shade @nerdydcfan @flowerchildishere @camilomyshiningsun @bugnug @algae-rave @yellowbadgermole @spoopy-fish-writes @perwaineintsomi
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fourangers · 5 years ago
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Kakashi’s exposé
Dedicated to @rivaille-plisetsky that suggested the prompt: 
Post-War shenanigans with Kakashi being the only one with knowledge of their relationship
So here it is! I hope you’ll like it. SNS, with a tiny bit one-sided Sakura --> Sasuke, and sex insinuations. Comedy and it’s a lil to the side of crack.
AO3 link
==.==.==
Somehow, some way, it just clicked. Maybe it was due to exhaustion, or Sakura's confession still fresh in his mind but Kakashi witnessed the way Sasuke was looking at his best friend/rival/nemesis, how affection warmed his black eyes mixed with longing and burning intensity and it was just…oh. Oh. OoooooOooH.
Everything made sense now. It's no wonder he was so desperate to cut off his bonds with Naruto and why it brought him so much pain to do so. 
Kakashi just stood mildly shocked as his eyes followed his previous students' behavior, from Sakura's relieved smile, Naruto's wide beam and Sasuke's gaze constantly trained towards the blond nin. 
Ah…to be young and naive.
⏤.⏤ 
Kakashi had a hard time feigning surprise when he saw both boys tucked together, blissfully sleeping on the small bed at the hospital. Sakura, on the other hand, was so happy about Sasuke's return that she didn't connect the dots yet.
The next few months was a cumbersome process of finding solid proofs about the Uchiha's massacre tying with Konoha's higher office corruption, since the elders were eager to throw Sasuke in jail while he was still recuperating from his wounds. Fortunately Naruto called Shikamaru for help as they searched in the archives with Tsunade's permission. 
Soon enough all the guilty were charged for conspiracy in ethnic cleansing and thrown behind bars. Sasuke also spent some time in jail for multiple attempts of murder against the 5 kages, but thankfully due to his contributions in ending the latest ninja war and Naruto’s constant nagging with Tsunade, he was set free.
Naruto and Kakashi both expected that Sasuke would bolt out of Konoha the second he was unchained. However, much to their puzzled astonishment, the last Uchiha had decided to settle down. He even took the chuunin exams with Naruto as some sort of proof that he desired to get back being a Konoha citizen. As if there was something(someone) that rooted him to the ground.
When Sasuke reached 18 years old, Kakashi gifted him a special Icha Icha book with prim pride.
Sasuke glanced at the title, glared his ex-teacher with his face bright red, and promptly hid when they noticed Naruto’s chakra close by. Several comrades joined in afterwards, some were part of the rookie nine, other were Sasuke’s current teammates, all gathered to celebrate his birthday.
Through the course of that night, wherever Sasuke would go, Ino and Sakura were on his toes once again, vying for his attention. It was a confusing realization for Kakashi, that even if Sakura was now an accomplished medic-nin and jounin, she would revert to her pre-teen self once Sasuke was around. Kakashi simply observed in between sips of sake while Sakura fussed over Sasuke with her doe-eyed expression, and Sasuke tolerated her presence with the smallest furrow on his handsome face. Black eyes flickered towards Naruto’s back, before he exhaled a heavy sigh, calling Sakura much to Ino’s annoyance.
On the next day, the news about Sasuke and Sakura dating was the talk of the whole town. Or rather, how Sakura was running behind her beloved wherever they go, emerald eyes glimmering like a little girl winning the affection of her idolized popular boy.
This is bizarre; Kakashi concluded watching the one-sided interactions. Those youngsters were just too much for him sometimes.
Naruto swore that he welcomed this new development with open arms, really, like…really. He’d accept no one else but Sasuke, if he was going to lose Sakura’s hand to another man. But Kakashi could notice the tightness of his grins whenever team 7 would reunite, but whether he was jealous over Sakura or Sasuke, no one would ever know.
Months have passed and Sasuke was slowly entering a dangerous territory, returning to his personal darkness that few could reach. Maybe it was due to Sakura’s impatience that their relationship got stuck since day one, or how she finally broke the illusion that her idol was just a regular man, so she was currently much more content spending her time with Ino nowadays. Maybe it was because his friendship with Naruto was becoming strained over the days. Maybe the Hyuuga’s heiress bold approach towards his best friend was grating Sasuke’s nerves.
Kakashi sighed. They were so much cuter back when they were little genins.
But Kakashi was; he hoped, wiser now. The accumulated experience he built up all over those years brought him a wider scope about how he should handle human emotions and its complexities. He wouldn't make the same mistake he had done before, unlike last time when he failed talking some sense to pre-teen Sasuke. 
He stood up, hopping on the direction towards Naruto’s house.
⏤.⏤ 
One year later… 
Konohamaru cleared his throat, knocking on the door. He heard grumbles, quiet steps and then the door was pried open with a pair of glaring eyes.
He gulped. “Good morning. Is Naruto-niichan nearby?” 
Sasuke thinned his lips, turning around. “Cooking breakfast.”
Konohamaru gave a brisk nod, striding towards the kitchen and being greeted by Naruto’s wide gin.
“Hey Konohamaru! ‘Sup?”
“Naruto-niichan! It’s your first day in the Hokage’s apprenticeship, are you excited?”
“Sure am! Man, can’t believe that Tsunade-baachan is going to pass the torch to me, I thought for sure they were going to choose Kakashi-sensei that⏤”
“Oh? Talking about me?”
Konohamaru and Naruto shrieked when they heard Kakashi’s sudden chime, Sasuke stood leaning on the wall unimpressed. 
The older man said. “Ah, here I was coming here to congratulate my former protegée, and all I hear is Naruto-kun talking behind my back. You’re hurting my fragile heart.”
“Can’t you knock on the door like a regular person? You almost gave me a heart attack dammit.” Naruto complained, rubbing his chest. 
“Another reason why I’m questioning Konoha’s decision to make you the next Hokage. I assumed the prerequisite for such an important job was to master basic moves like noticing someone’s chakra when they are close by, dumbass.” Sasuke scoffed.
“Say what, you asshole⏤”
“As much as I’d love to get down the memory lane watching you boys bicker, I’m here to give you a gift, Naruto.” Kakashi placed several books on the table. “My entire Icha Icha collection. All signed by Jiraiya-sama.”
Naruto stared wide-eyed once the information sank in, picking up one book as if it was the most precious thing in the world. He leafed through pages, smiling fondly when he read Jiraiya’s message. They let Naruto take his time browsing through the books, even Sasuke curbed his usual teasing barb too.
The Uchiha nin seemed to realize something, coughing. “Well, since Kakashi already gave you his present, I suppose I should also give you mine.”
Naruto’s eyes were narrowed and suspicious. “And what exactly you’re gonna give me, bastard?”
Sasuke smirked, throwing his arm around Naruto’s shoulder and directing to their bedroom. “You’ll enjoy it, for sure.” 
Konohamaru and Kakashi watched as Naruto was dragged by Sasuke. Konohamaru muttered. “Well, I guess I’ll wait here until they are done. I was also gonna give Naruto-niichan my gift.”
Oh. “Ooooh, there’s no need for you to wait this long Konohamaru-kun. You can give him once we’re in Konoha’s headquarters.”
“What? I can wait a little, I mean⏤”
Kakashi patted the younger nin’s shoulder as he hurried them to the exit. “I have a feeling they are going to take a while, so we better go.”
Several months had passed and Naruto was beginning to get used to the hectic schedule of being Tsunade’s apprentice. The assistants were also smoothly adapting with his working style too, most comfortable with his friendliness.
The rare exceptions were when Naruto’s best friend would go to a long term mission, and the sunny personality will cloud to a petulant pout. 
“Naruto.” Everyone jumped startled from the familiar baritone voice, swiveling their heads to see Sasuke perched on the window.
Naruto instantly brightened up, turning back to face their assistants as he declared. “Hey guys! Sasuke is here so I’m gonna go ok, ‘s gonna be really quick I swear. Be right back, be right back!” Both Naruto and Sasuke disappeared in a cloud of poof.
The assistants shrugged, some even rolled his eyes while they resumed their work. 
⏤.⏤ 
How odd it was that whenever Sasuke was around though, Naruto would always blink out of their eyes. For someone who wore neon orange outfit and had bright golden hair in midst of an ocean of dark heads, Naruto could disappear without an effort. 
Saeko rubbed her shoulders while she searched the aforementioned blond nin, seeking his signature. She’s way past her prime to be able to find a strong shinobi like Naruto-kun. 
Fortunately for her, she spotted Kakashi from afar, calling him. “Kakashi-kun!”
Kakashi acknowledged her with a nod.
“Have you seen Naruto-kun? I really need his signature to authorize a new mission.” She sighed.
Kakashi chuckled. “Well…in case you can’t see him, I guess you could look around and try to find Sasuke instead.”
“Ah right…Uchiha-kun right.” Saeko shook her head. “They are almost attached to the hip.”
“Right.” 
“Such a beautiful friendship between those two boys, right?”
Kakashi stared the old lady before settled with a hum.
“They need to settle down and find a good ladies in their lives though.” She quipped with chiding tone. “Why are they taking so long to get married, I wonder. Youngsters those days are in no hurry to build a family, they are exactly like that Yamanaka girl; living with her best friend Haruno-chan.”
Kakashi hummed absentmindedly once again.
Almost as if he was reading their minds, Sasuke exited the toilet in front of them, licking his lips as his finger wiped his mouth.
“Ah, Uchiha-kun!” Saeko tightened her steps, approaching him. “Have you seen Naruto-kun anywhere?”
Sasuke glanced at her back, then gazed Kakashi’s amused eyes, shrugging. “Behind me.”
“Behind y⏤?” Lo and behold, the future Hokage opened the door a little breathless and disheveled, hand combing through his golden hair. 
His cheeks were tinged red but he soon recomposed himself when he saw the old lady. “Oh hey, Saeko-san, Kakashi-sensei! Why are you⏤”
“Naruto-kun, you’re going to be the death of this old woman, I swear!” Saeko interrupted him, shoving the papers on his face. “I know that Uchiha-kun is your best friend but do you really need to have him next to you 24/7?”
“I’m sure that Naruto-kun would happily perform his tasks as the Hokage apprentice, normally…” Kakashi muttered. “But I guess Sasuke just missed him too much.”
Sasuke glared, rolling his eyes. “I’ll see you soon Naruto.”  
Saeko concluded that their friendship is really one of a kind, watching Uchiha-kun’s back as Naruto was signing her papers. Gossip around town said that a female shinobi might disrupt such cozy relationship, even though Sasuke kept turning down every date request. There was a bet about which man would find a girlfriend first, however, Kakashi almost zeroed his bank account with the belief that his former students wouldn’t find any girl whatsoever.
Every female shinobi dedicated their time to seduce either the last Uchiha or the future of Hokage of Konoha. This also meant that they were thinning Sasuke’s very limited patience, their constant pestering wouldn’t give them some time for themselves.
⏤.⏤ 
“Naruto-niichan! Wow, you lucky dog!” Konohamaru chirped when he spotted his friend in the corridor, punching the tanned arm playfully. “I can’t believe this⏤!”
“Believe what, Konohamaru?” Naruto questioned. 
“Haven’t you heard? Tomoko Saiyuri, the most gorgeous woman of all Konoha is actually going to ask you on a date!”
“He’s not interested.” Sasuke grunted.
“Oh, c’mon Sasuke-niichan, I know you might be sore because she chose Naruto-niichan instead of you, but there’s no way Naruto-niichan wouldn’t be interested because⏤”
“But he’s not interested, he’s not available, he won’t do anything with her.” Sasuke hissed.
“Uh, yeah…Konohamaru, why would I be interested?” Naruto squinted his eyes puzzled. “I’m honored, honestly, but where did you get the idea I would⏤”
“You know that this is your fault right.” Sasuke snapped towards Naruto. 
“What?” Naruto grumbled.
“You give too many openings, people are still thinking you’re available.”
“Uh…wait, Naruto-niichan, does that mean you’re actually seeing someone⏤?”
“Wait, don’t put the blame on me, asshole. Where in the hell did I show that I’m available?”  
“Well, you’re such an oblivious dumbass, that you wouldn’t realize yours and anyone’s feelings even if it’s right under your nose.” Sasuke muttered under his breath. “Maybe this is the reason why everyone is also blind about us.”
Naruto stared for a while with his jaw slacked, before blurting out. “We live together, I thought everyone knew.”
“Most think we’re just roommates, some still believe that you’re guarding me while I’m on house arrest.”
“What? We share a bed.”
“They think we didn’t find a good house with two bedrooms.”
Konohamaru interjected tentatively. “Um, Naruto-niichan, what exactly are you talking about⏤?”
Naruto however, couldn’t listen to him, blue eyes still trained towards Sasuke. “I don’t get it, we haven’t seen anyone else so far ever since we decided to live together, I thought⏤”
Sasuke sighed. “They think we’re just taking our time to find a girl to settle down.”
Naruto nodded numbly, scratching his head. “Oh. Is that why Momiji-san wanted to cook me some obento?”
Sasuke grunted, his glare darkening. “And you almost fell for it, hook line and sinker.”
Naruto gazed back, studying the Uchiha’s activated Sharingan. Everyone was staring with growing confusion until Naruto snorted. “Are you jealous Sasuke-chan?” He laughed.
“No, absolutely not.” Sasuke promptly defended himself, raising his chin. “I’m staking my claim, that is all, since someone else is not making any effort over this relationship.”
“Awwww⏤you’re really jealous!” Naruto grinned.
“I’m not jealous, usuratonkachi, I just feel like you should have made everything clear to everyone so I can avoid all those troublesome harpies and⏤” When Sasuke saw the determined blue eyes, he tensed but all of a sudden, Naruto grabbed him and hoisted over his shoulder.  "Naruto, what the hell are you doing, I swear I'm going to fry your sorry ass if you⏤Naruto⏤!" The door slammed shut.
Then, silence. All ninjas on the vicinity didn’t know whether they should intervene whatever skirmish because Naruto was going to be the Hokage, but still, since he’s the future Hokage, he didn’t need anyone to defend him, right?
Their thought process was interrupted when he heard a moan. But not any moan, it was specifically Sasuke’s moan. Every face was colored red. As the moans and groans were increasing in speed and volume, the shade of their blushes were darkening, and everyone froze on the spot. 
A constant thumping noise joined in, eliminating whatever doubt they might had out of the window, in concern with the activity they were doing in the Hokage’s office. The banging grew faster and louder, that at this point everyone in the building could hear it out.
A guttural scream ripped from Naruto’s voice, that made all women fan to themselves and all men shuffle uncomfortably. Another pregnant silence reigned in the building, until Naruto opened the door beaming ear to ear, holding Sasuke’s hand while the latter was scowling, limping his steps.
“So!” Naruto proclaimed cheerfully. “As you can see, Sasuke and I are unavailable for any possible dates at the present and future moment. We’re pretty busy screwing each other, after all.”
“I am screwing you next time, usuratonkachi.” Sasuke grumbled darkly.
Naruto chortled, unaffected by his threat. “He’s so sweet right. I can’t ask for any better boyfriend.”
Sasuke kicked his legs. Naruto retaliated by slapping hard his back. As their skirmish was growing more violent, everyone scurried away from the couple.
Those two are insane.
(Kakashi later appeared in Konoha’s headquarters, ready to collect his money from the bet. It’s more than enough to secure a very nice retirement. The news about Naruto and Sasuke’s relationship reached to Tsunade’s ears but she was wholly unimpressed. She did punch her protegée to seven foot below ground for soiling her office though.)
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evil-overlord-scriptology · 4 years ago
Text
But I Don’t Want to be a Sensei! Pt 4 (ARCHIVED)
Chapters 14 & 15
Chapter 14: Round 2 with Peach-boy
I nudged Naruto's side with the toe of my sandal. He didn't even twitch. Squatting down I poked the brat's cheek with a rigid finger, “Hey, dumbass...” I said loudly, knowing that a knucklehead like Naruto would react if I called him names. He still didn't move. “Obito Mini-me. Brat. Idiot. Dumb blonde. Dead last. Coward.” When the brat didn't react at all I stood back up with a sigh and turned to the others standing in the doorway.
 “Well either he's dead or out like a light post.” I told them, scratching the back of my head. Hinata gasped a little, her hands going to her mouth as she no doubt thought that her precious 'Naruto-kun' was dead.
 Tsunami looked as equally worried as the little Hyuuga heiress, “You don't think he overdid it in training, do you? He was looking pretty exhausted last night.
 “Hn. He was passed out in the forest yesterday morning.” Sasuke commented thoughtfully.
 I groaned and hung my head, I really didn't need this at the moment, “Fine, Sasuke will be on guard duty today and Hinata will train.” I said defeated. I hated it when people screwed up my schedule! “Hinata you know the rules. If anyone suspicious shows up, head for the bridge and warn everyone.”
 “H-Hai.”
 Sasuke frowned, “But that was the rotation yesterday.” I glared at him. Like I didn't know that already, idiot.
 “Hinata still needs to train in her stealth and since Naruto is stealing your rest day, you can take his spot on guard duty. Don't complain, Duckass, true shinobi don't protest orders.” Like I predicted, Sasuke snapped his jaw shut and didn't make another sound.
 Really, it was insulting how predictable that kid was.
 “Look, if it makes you feel better, I'll go with you that way you can relax at the bridge.” Everyone but Inari gave me strange looks. I returned their gaze with an unamused look, “Stop staring like calves at a new gate. I'm bored.” I snapped, perhaps just a little too defensively. By Sasuke's sudden smug look I was guessing he knew why I really was going.
 I was worried about the brat.
 With good reason though. There was no such thing as a jounin who didn't have a sixth sense for danger; and I felt more jittery than when Obito accidentally released those rabid squirrels in the house.
 I mentally shuddered at the memory.
 I moved past the miniature crowd and lead them outside. Turning to Tsunami I began issuing orders, “When Naruto wakes up, just tell him to practice his taijutsu; you also have permission to send him on any errands you have. Hinata, I want you to try and sneak up on as many woodland creatures as you can. If you catch five animals in a row then join Sasuke and I on the bridge. Duckass, Grandpa Dunk, let's go.” I turned on my heel and immediately started for the bridge without waiting for the two idiot males catch up to me.
 “Geez, for a woman you walk pretty fast.” Tazuna panted when he and my cousin finally caught up. It was really pathetic that we were almost to the bridge by that point.
 I gave the old drunk an unimpressed look, “Not all women are geishas or civilians who don't have anywhere important to be. The success of a mission could rely on fast feet, I could possibly save a life that would otherwise be lost if I arrive quicker than my enemies anticipate.”
 Tazuna pulled a face, “Hey kid, are all shinobi like this one or is it just her?” He asked Sasuke.
 Sasuke just shrugged and didn't comment. He practically had to jog to keep up with us adults; I couldn't tell if he wasn't answering because he didn't want to or because he was too focused on not falling behind. I was guessing it was a little bit of both.
 “Tazuna, how long do you have before the bridge is finished?” I asked the old man. Now wasn't the time for fun and games. That sense of dread I had been feeling all morning was getting worse the closer we got to the bridge.
 Grandpa Drunk shrugged, “Depends. If I have a full roster of workers, it should only be a few weeks. But with Gatou controlling everything and scaring the people, I keep losing my workers. Just yesterday I had one of my foremen quiet! I don't even have half of a roster now, it could take months with the amount of workers I got.”
 Grimacing, I halted at the entrance to the bridge, “That's what I feared.” I muttered.
 Tazuna gaped at his unconscious employees littering the bridge. I could tell by their chakra levels that the men were still alive, but only just. “What tha-?!” Tazuna exclaimed, his face twitching in horror. I glanced at him then at Sasuke. Sasuke looked back at me, his eyes gleaming with an odd shine of excitement. He was ready.
 A sudden mist blew in from the ocean. I snarled in frustration and stepped in front of Tazuna, “Stay behind me.” I said sharply. Tazuna didn't say anything, but he didn't move.
 That stupid creepy chuckle drifted out from the fog, “Sorry to keep you waiting, Uchiha. I see you still got that brat with you, but what happened with the other two? Did they run off?” I heard a slight clicking behind me, but didn't glance towards my cousin. I knew he wasn't doing something stupid. Of all my genin I trusted Sasuke the most in a fight, even if he had bouts of cowardice when I least expected it.
 Peaches chuckled again, “Oh look, he's shaking again. Pathetic.” The nuke-nin laughed mockingly.
 There was a small intake of air from Sasuke and I felt Zabuza's chakra spike as water clones surrounded the three of us. I tensed and palmed a kunai, ready to throw it at the clone's head that was in front of me if he so much as blinked in a way I didn't like.
 Sasuke scoffed, “I'm trembling with... excitement.”
 The Zabuza water clones seemed surprised at the admission and I only rolled my eyes. Why couldn't the need for dramatics skip Sasuke? It skipped Itachi and me, why not one more generation?! I had enough drama from Naruto, I didn't need Sasuke filling in for that little brat too.
 Speaking of brats...
 I glanced at my cousin out of the corner of my eye, “Play nice.” I said teasingly. That was all the permission Sasuke needed. He twirled the kunai in his hand around a finger so that the blade was pointing at the clone in front of him. With a delightful smirk that reminded me a little too much of Obito's sadistic grin, my baby cousin pounced at the water clones.
 While Peach-boy's clones were busy trying to defeat an Uchiha brat, I ran through the signs for a summoning and slammed my hand to the bridge's surface, “Kuchiyose no Jutsu!” I heard Zabuza growl angrily as a swarm of normal sized hawks flew up from the seal, spiraling into a twister of feathers and harsh cries that surrounded me like a moving wall. I held up my right arm and one of the hawks detached itself from it's flock. “Fly to Hyuuga Hinata and inform her to come as back up.” The hawk dipped its head at my command and took off to the sky, flying out of sight before turning in the direction of Hinata. No need to tell our enemies where an ally was after all. The rest of the hawks dispersed among the cables of the bridge, their sharp yellow eyes watching.
 While I was busy with my summonings, Sasuke finished up his little spar with the water clones. He looked about as cocky as a true Uchiha when he returned to his spot beside me. I mentally whimpered and hoped that I didn't get an arrogant little brat who thought he was God's gift to man. If so, I was going to beat that out of him and suffer Itachi's wrath with a smile on my face.
 “Ooooo, the brat's improving.” Peach-boy said from my right. All three of us turned to see the man with horrible fashion sense giving us a leer. At least I thought it was a leer, it was kind of hard to tell when the lower half of his face was bandaged up. His ally stood beside him, still wearing that false hunter-nin mask. “Looks like you've got competition... Haku.” Zabuza continued.
 “So it seems.” The boy, Haku, murmured quietly.
 Trolling time.
 “Oi oi. Peachy's ally, or whatever the hell your name is, are you a boy or a girl? Because honestly, you're a very androgynous individual.” I asked, intentionally playing the ignorant idiot. Tazuna and Sasuke were giving me looks that could only be described as 'way to ruin the suspense, dummy'.
 Haku and Zabuza exchanged looks and I took my chance to continue, “You know what? It doesn't matter anyway, I think I'll just call you Zabuza's Bitch.” I said with a smirk. Both nuke-nins snapped their heads around to glare at me–well I assume Haku glared, it was hard to tell with the mask–while I cackled in delight of pissing my enemy off.
 “Take care of the brat. I'll take the bitch.” Zabuza growled.
 Haku turned his gaze on Sasuke, “Right.” The kid murmured again. Then he moved. Startled I opened my mouth to shout a warning to Sasuke, but Zabuza was on me before I could utter a single syllable.
 I back flipped away from Tazuna, distancing myself from the client and the man trying to kill him. At the moment Zabuza seemed pretty focused on me, so I didn't have to worry. I smirked as I kicked Kubikiribōchō away from me. “Don't tell me I struck a nerve.” I cooed as I deflected another swing with my kunai. Zabuza snarled like an angry animal and charged at me again. I snorted and ducked under his swing. If I had know pissing Peaches off would make him attack like a predictable wild animal, I would have done it a long time ago.
 Kicking off the ground, I gave myself enough time to spare a glance at Sasuke. My eyes widened as I saw Haku performing hand signs with only one hand. That wasn't something you saw everyday. I wonder if the sharingan could somehow pick it up.
 Before I could activate my sharingan to see if I could, Zabuza attacked again, “You're opponent is me! Let's leave the kids to their game.”
 I shot Zabuza a nasty glare, “Oh, go drown in your own water ninjutsu! I didn't come all this way with a bunch of brats and a drunk old man to hear you blowing steam, ya old windbag.” I snapped, getting irritated. I knew Zabuza wasn't taking this fight seriously. He was just trying to keep me from Sasuke and Haku's fight.
 Peachy paused, “A bunch of brats, eh?” He quoted, sounding oddly interested. “So you don't think that those genin are worth anything either.”
 “Oh I think they're worth a lot of things, I just like calling them brats. They're my brats and I'm the only one allowed to call them that and get away with it.” I snapped back and flung my kunai at Peachy-boy's head to emphasize my point. He easily ducked under the kunai and charged at me, his sword back and ready for a strong strike to my legs. I leaped into the air over his blade and put my hands down on Zabuza's back, flipping over him to land between him and the kids.
 I smirked, “Ya know, some people would think you were compensating for something with that big blade of yours.” I commented sweetly.
 “You're letting that big mouth get away again, Uchiha.” Peachy growled.
 I shrugged, “Well at least I'm not trying to prank you as well as fight you like my brother does. That's just annoying.” I said coolly. From the look in Zabuza's eyes, he thought my inappropriate remarks were a hell of a lot more annoying.
 “Argh!” Both of us whipped around to see Sasuke kicking Haku away.
 Sasuke stood in his spot, smirking, “Seems you're not as fast as you think you are.” He said, idly spinning his kunai around his index finger. Cocky little git, I was definitely beating that arrogance out of his system.
 Zabuza glared at his ally, “Haku. Stop messing around and letting a brat beat you, get on with it!” He ordered.
 The masked boy stood back up easily, “Yes.” He responded in an almost robotic voice.
 Frowning I turned my back on Zabuza to watch what the masked brat was doing. Icy blue strands of chakra haloed Haku and he bowed his head, “I'm sorry it's come to this.” The boy said softly and made a strange sign. The temperature dropped drastically and I uttered a curse under my breath as I automatically regulated my chakra to keep myself warm. Of course our newest enemy would have some kind of tie to cold weather. It wouldn't be hell if he didn't.
 Stupid karma demons and their stupid agenda against me.
 The water around Sasuke and Haku suddenly leaped up into the air to form flat frozen surfaces. Haku stepped into the mirrors, senbon needles in his hands. Meanwhile I gaped in surprise, it was not cold enough to form ice like that. Even the most powerful shinobi with water nature had a hard time creating ice even in temperatures where it was easy to form. That only meant one thing.
 Kekke Genkai.
 Peaches chuckled behind me, “Seems you figured it out.”
 Growling I ran for the ice mirrors, but Peach-boy flash stepped in front of me. “If you're going to fight, you will fight me.” He snapped.
 I glared at him. “Bastard.” I spat out.
 The peachy nuke-nin chuckled creepily, “Oh? Out of your witty comments? I'm crushed.” I could practically taste the sarcasm in the air.
 “You have three seconds to step aside before I really crush you.”
 “How cute. You think you can defeat me. You weren't able to before, what makes you think you can now that we're surrounded by even more water than before?” My eyes widened a fraction and I flung my kunai at the water clone that I thought was Zabuza and leaping away before the real Zabuza could cut me down. He didn't look all that happy when he turned to face me. He scoffed when he saw my sharingan, “That again? Are all the Uchiha so weak that they rely on that silly Kekke Genkai of theirs? How pathetic.”
 Sasuke yelped and I looked over Peaches shoulder to see Haku raining senbon down on my cousin like a vengeful thunderstorm. Anger washed over me, hot and heady, when I landed my gaze back on Zabuza. “Two seconds to move.”
 Peaches sneered.
 “One.”
 He didn't move.
 I held my right arm above my head and brought my left to my mouth. Curling my index and thumb around my tongue I whistled loudly, using a small wind ninjutsu to amplify the sound. My hawk summons, having been sitting on the sidelines forgotten, all took flight. They flew in circles like a roiling thundercloud of brown and black, using my upraised arm as the pivot point.
 “Last chance to move.” I said. Zabuza stubbornly stayed where he was. My mouth twisted in an ugly grimace and I lowered my right arm to point at the Mist nuke-nin. The hawks gave one last turn before following my finger and shooting straight towards Peach-boy.
 He smirked.
 My eyes widened.
 “Hha!” I felt water douse my back and I spun around to see Hinata standing in a puddle of water, formerly a water clone, panting slightly. She gave me a shaky grin, “I-I'm sorry Y-Yanagi-sensei. I c-came as fast as I c-c-c-could.” She stuttered slightly, a blush forming on her cheeks. I didn't blame her, Hinata had suddenly become the center of attention after pulling a stunt like that. Even Haku stopped torturing my poor cousin to stare at her.
 I grinned, “Hey, I'm not complaining. You just saved me from being skewered like a roast pig.” I joked before turning serious, “Guard Tazuna, don't leave his side for any reason.” I ordered. Hinata gave a firm nod and leaped sideways until she was in front of Tazuna, in a Gentle Fist stance. When I turned to face Zabuza again, he did not look amused.
 “Oh... did she ruin your little scheme?” I asked innocently, pressing an index finger to the corner of my mouth like a slut trying to act cute.
 That did it, I could practically hear Peachy's patience snap. He snarled and charged at me, “Shut up!”
 I laughed as I jumped away from him, “Looks like you underestimated my brats, Peach-boy. Sasuke and Hinata are clan kids and having been training with their families since they could hold a kunai right.” I ducked under Peachy's swing and shot my left leg out for a round house kick. Zabuza launched into the air to avoid my leg and I pulled back before he could land on it. “Sasuke is the best in his class and no one can defeat Hinata in taijutsu. She's a Hyuuga after all, it's in her blood.” I taunted as I back flipped away from the Kubikiribōchō.
 Skidding to a halt a few feet away from Peaches I smirked, “And what have you got? A coward with a nice Kekke Genkai. Well, I've got two brats with Kekke Genkai and neither of them are cowards!”
 Zabuza's face twisted unpleasantly, “Haku, stop goofing around and kill that pest!” He barked out, his gaze darting over his shoulder to where the ice mirrors stood. Haku didn't respond, but only started throwing more senbons at Sasuke at a more rapid pace than before; I tried not to flinch when I heard Sasuke cry out. Peachy looked back at me, his gaze deadlier than before, “That big mouth of yours is going to get your brats killed, Uchiha.”
 I only smiled, “I'm confident they can handle one little brat, even one as powerful as yours. Besides, you forgot something.” Peach-boy stiffened as it dawned on him that Naruto had yet to appear. My smile twisted into a sneer, “You know, I think my last student deserves to be called the 'Stupidly Brave Shinobi of Konoha' more than I do. After all, not many genin are brave enough to fight someone like you, Peach-boy, let alone get the better of you.”
 As if planned there was a puff of smoke to the right of Haku's mirrors. Naruto's voice drifted from the white billowing vapors, “I resent that, Frizzy-sensei! Call me the 'Fearless Shinobi of Konoha'! That's right, Uzumaki Naruto is here!” My eye only twitched a little at the nickname. I'd let it slide this one time.
 Peach-boy blinked slowly at Naruto then looked at me, “You think some brat like him can do anything?”
 I shrugged, “Why not? It was a dead-last like Naruto who helped turn the last shinobi war back in Konoha's favor.” I responded coolly. I should know, Obito was the idiot I was talking about. “I feel Naruto can do the same with this little spat we have. Dead-last shinobi have a tendency to surprise people.” Naruto took a second to gawk at me, not use to my free praise. All I could say was he had better back up my claims or I was going to murder the little sucker.
 Naruto got a really big grin on his face, “You know how the hero always shows up at the last minute and kicks butt? Well that's what I'm going to do, right now! So don't you worry sensei, you can just sit back and watch me beat these guys!”
 I facepalmed.
 The blonde idiot ignored me, “Alright, you're history!” He formed a sign, “Shadow Clone Jutsu!” But before Naruto could form a single clone, Zabuza twisted around and threw a handful of shuriken at him. Like with the Demon Brothers, Naruto's first reaction was the freeze in fear.
 “Move Naruto!” I yelled, my heart in my throat as I watched the throwing stars head for my frozen student. I wouldn't be able to get there in time to stop them, not even my hawks surrounding the bridge would be able to grab the shuriken in time.
 Out of no where, senbon needles collided with the shuriken and knocked them off course. I jerked in surprise and twisted to stare at Haku half leaning out of his mirrors, still in the position of someone who had just thrown something. Zabuza narrowed his eyes at his ally.
 Now that he was out of danger, I felt it safe to yell at Naruto, “You imbecile! This is a real battle not a stupid spar; a shinobi's lifestyle is deception, not a damn talent show! Always keep your enemy guessing, be unpredictable so they can't figure out how to defeat you. So get your head outta your ass and think before someone makes a dartboard out of you!”
 Naruto turned about as red as Hinata did when Naruto got within ten feet of her. He started yelling apologies, but I ignored him to glance at Haku. Everyone else seemed to think that Haku had thrown senbon at Naruto at the same time Zabuza did and their attacks ended up colliding; but I knew better. One look at my cousin-turned-porcupine told me that Haku did not miss his targets. Which could only mean... he meant to throw those shuriken off track.
 The question was why.
 Peach-boy seemed to be thinking the same thing I was, “Haku, what are you doing?” Peachy demanded. His tone was dangerous and angry, he was pissed at Haku for disturbing his attack. In Zabuza's state of mind at the moment, I wouldn't be entirely surprised if he attacked his own ally out of anger.
 One could only hope.
 Haku straightened out of his position and dipped his head towards Peaches, “Zabuza-sama, let me fight this boy in my own way... please.” The brat rasped. Mildly I wondered if all Kiri nins had that smoker rasp, or if it was just these two idiots.
 Naruto glared at the masked boy, “Bring. It. On.” He challenged before I could tell him to not be stupid. I suppressed the urge to hang my head in defeat at the stupidity of the blonde brat and wondered if he knew how powerful Haku was. Sasuke was hardly a match for the nuke-nin, what chance did Naruto have against him?!
 Zabuza chuckled, “As usual you're too soft, Haku. Fine, if that is what you wish.” Soft? What part of that masked brat was...
 I glanced at Sasuke. He was injured but not too bad, nothing that would cause any lasting damage. So either Haku was very sadistic and liked to play with his enemies; or he was soft as Zabuza said and wasn't trying to hurt Sasuke, just stall him. Still, knowing Naruto, he'd piss Haku off enough that the nuke-nin would tear him to shreds. I started to take a step forward to intervene before things got worse, but Peaches blocked my path.
 “Don't even think about it.” Oddly enough, Peachy sounded amused. “You know what will happen if you take on Haku. I'll go after the bridge builder and that little girl.” I stiffened and looked to the left where Tazuna and Hinata stood. There was no way that I would be able to end Haku and protect those two at the same time. Against a long sword like the Kubikiribōchō, Hinata's taijutsu was useless; and without me guiding my hawk summons they couldn't do shit but sit there and look pretty. I supposed I could summon a larger hawk to deal with Zabuza while I took out Haku, but that would cut down on my chakra and possibly put me in a dangerous position.
 Damn.
 Zabuza seemed to know I was in a bind, he smirked underneath those bandages, “Relax, Uchiha. Lets see how our students do... one on one.” I gave him an Uchiha Glare, but he wasn't even paying attention to me. I didn't dare attack, he might not be looking at me, but I know the Peach Bastard was still prepared to fight me. Only an idiot would think otherwise.
 Apparently Sasuke was an idiot.
 While Haku was talking to Naruto, a kunai came flying out of the ice prison that held Sasuke. Haku easily dodged the knife and looked at my cousin, “Don't think I forgot about you, not for an instant.” The masked nuke-nin tilted his head a little, “Some warriors accept defeat gracefully, they know when they are beaten...” Oh great, know I was going to have two idiots who couldn't think straight, “Others do not. So be it, let us finish our battle then.”
 I couldn't help but groan quietly as Haku reentered his mirrors. Zabuza actually snorted and gave me an amused look as if we weren't enemies fighting to the death but two people just watching our students spar. I shot him a brief glare and looked away. I refused to think Peaches was anyone else but my enemy.
 It was torture having to watch my cousin practically being torn to shreds by multiple attacks coming from all the mirrors. With my sharingan I could pick up the real Haku and how he jumped from mirror to mirror to keep the element of surprise. The little pest was fast, even with my sharingan I could just barely pick up his movements as he flashed between the mirrors. But I still didn't know how the mirrors worked.
 “Sasuke, Naruto think! You have to attack the mirrors from the inside and outside at the same time to figure out how they work!” I yelled. Naruto's face brightened with an idea and there was a poof and...
 He was gone.
 It was only when Sasuke started yelling did I realize where he went. My eye twitched and I glanced at Zabuza. The nuke-nin looked like he was on the verge of laughing, I was almost tempted to tell him that I was disowning Naruto as my student after a stunt like that.
 “Katon: Phoenix Sage Jutsu!” Sasuke yelled out and there was a brief glow of orange that surrounded the multiple mirrors at various angles, but none of them melted.
 I could hear the amusement in Haku's voice when he said, “You'll need more firepower than that to melt this ice.” I stiffened slightly. More firepower? I could easily do that, but...
 Peaches smirked at me, easily reading my mind, “If you melt the mirrors you'll incinerate your students. Doesn't that defeat the purpose?” He asked. I shot him a nasty look and mildly wondered why he hadn't attacked yet. Peach-boy didn't have a problem earlier, was he just stalling then to get to this point and showcase his student? He had been hired to take out my client, not show off his student's prowess.
 Once again my suspicions of his involvement with the Mist Rebels surfaced. I eyed the man, trying to figure out his game. I doubted that he was ever fighting me seriously. All he had done was send water clones and swing that big ass sword around. Zabuza had been part of the Seven Swordsmen of Kirigakure, he had gotten the position by being a master of kenjutsu. So far Zabuza had been attacking as if the Kubikiribōchō was just a piece of metal to be swung around and not a great sword.
 Of course it was always possible that he was downplaying his abilities to keep the element of surprise; I had been doing the same by only dodging Zabuza's sword and tossing kunai around when I got the opening. But it just didn't fit Peachy's personality to use deception when he had the opportunity to strike. I glanced at the ice prison as Haku bounded from mirror to mirror, raining senbon down on Sasuke and Naruto. Haku was the same. I knew that that jutsu was meant to trap and destroy an opponent. The positioning of the mirrors and the pure speed of Haku proved that point easily enough. So why weren't my students dead yet? From what I had gathered on Haku, I knew he wasn't the sick twisted kind of shinobi that enjoyed toying with their victims. Not even Zabuza was that way. Zabuza's way of killing was quick, painless, and silent; leaving any survivors baffled and frightened of the Demon of the Mist.
 Naruto's yelling stopped my musing, “I won't quit! Not ever, I'm going to survive and become Hokage because that is my dream!” I didn't know if I should be proud that he still wasn't giving up even after that downpour of needles or still embarrassed that he had gotten himself into that mess.
 What Haku responded with surprised me, “I didn't want to be a shinobi, it's painful. I don't want to kill you, but if you come closer I will have no choice.” What? “I will kill the kindness in my own heart and fully embrace the shinobi way. This bridge will the battlefield where our dreams collide. I will fight for my dream, just as you fight for yours. Please do not blame me, I fight for someone who is precious to me. I live for him and I will face death for him so that his dream will become reality. That is my dream, and for the sake of that dream, if I must I will act as a shinobi and take your lives!”
 I bowed my head and glanced at the silent Zabuza. It was obvious that Haku was referring to Peach-boy, but why? What did Zabuza do that made the kid so loyal to him? And furthermore, just what was Zabuza's dream? The more I listened to Haku, the more reluctant I was to kill the kid, but if he got in the way of my mission then I would cut him and Zabuza down.
 Peaches shot me a haughty glance, “Tell me Uchiha, does that wimpy village of yours still avoid the most important rule of being a shinobi?” He asked as if he were genuinely curious.
 I only started at him in silence. It was a loaded question, so I saw no need in wasting my breath with an answer that was already obvious.
 Peach-boy cackled like a madman, “I wonder what your precious little Hokage will say when you come back with two bodies instead of three live genin... if you survive that is.” I heard Tazuna inhale sharply as it dawned on him just how outnumbered the genin truly were. I glanced out of the corner of my eye to see how Hinata was holding up to the news of her possible death.
 Not too well.
 Zabuza followed my gaze, “She's going to faint.” He observed in a tone that could only be amusement. He looked back at me, “How is it that you ended up with three incompetent brats? You're supposed to be an A-class kunoichi, and yet here you are... babysitting.”
 “Hn.” I grunted. That insult was so pathetic I knew I would lose brain cells just by answering it. One would think that the Bloody Mist would pencil in a trash talk class right after their academy students learned how to gut a helpless victim. At least so they wouldn't kill their opponents from the lame insults flying around.
 Unless... that was their stupid plan all along.
 The damn man didn't shut up though, “Falling back on the Uchiha customary response? How unlike you.” Great now he was adding sarcasm to the list. My eye twitched and I came close to planting my fist in his stupid, bandaged face if only to shut him up; but I somehow refrained... for now. “It must goad you that your precious Hokage would dump a bunch of brats on you. It's such a waste of your skills, chasing after three brats like you're their nanny while shinobi weaker than you take over your missions.” Peachy continued on, not even bothering to see if he was really insulting me or not.
 Finally I got fed up, “Your insults are pathetic. Even my pacifist cousin can talk trash better than you.” I deadpanned. Peachy didn't even have the decency to look offended. He only smirked at me from underneath his bandages.
 I reached into my weapons pouch and brought out a fan. Snapping it open I began lightly fanning myself like a geisha would. I even fluttered my eyelashes at Peaches, “Let's get this over with, ne? I want to leave by dusk.” I simpered like a primping airhead and reactivated my sharingan, having had deactivated it once I realized I would never figure out Haku's jutsu with my eyes.
 Zabuza jerked his gaze away from my sharingan and he reached back into his own kunai pouch. As he charged at me, I made a sweeping motion with my arm so that my fan cut through the air like a blade. When he came into my range, I thumbed the little lever on the handle and fourteen senbon needles shot out of the fan's ribs. Unfortunately due to the large curve of the fan's edge, only five senbons were heading directly at Peaches. He easily knocked them away with his two bladed kunai and jumped back.
 I snapped the fan shut and pointed it at him, “Lesson number one of kunoichi tactics: Everything can be a weapon.” I depressed another button on the bamboo frame of the fan and a three inch blade shot out of the little slot that was embedded into the fan, just to prove my point. Zabuza did not looked very pleased with my Fan of Wonders–as Obito called it.
 In fact, I could swear he was pouting.
 “This won't be like last time, Peach-boy.” I promised him, my smirk melting away to be replaced with the expressionless mask every shinobi seemed to have.
 The bandaged nuke-nin seemed to have stolen my smirk, “You're correct, because this time even if you do defeat me, you have no chance against Haku. When I found him he was just a street rat, but I trained him in the most advanced techniques. I taught him everything I know, and with that Kekke Genkai of his, soon he was able to take on dangerous enemies. Even outnumbered and in total darkness, he could strike with perfect accuracy. He cared nothing for his own life, or the lives of others. Haku became a unique fighting machine, a shinobi. In the end even he surpassed me, with that Kekke Genkai of his nothing can defeat it! I've created a tool that can destroy anyone who stands in my way, unlike those useless brats that follow you around like little lost puppies!”
 I grimaced in disgust at the man before me. Then I glanced over his shoulder at the prison of ice mirrors where the shouts of pain from Naruto and Sasuke were still originating. When I head heard Haku's speech I was ready to put an end to the battle peacefully, just to save the kid the pain of losing his precious person. Now I was ready to roast the fool who dared take advantage of loyalty like that.
 Zabuza laughed as he looked back at the ice mirrors with a crazed look in his eyes, “You think those punks can defeat Haku? He's the ultimate battle tool of destruction!”
 “Would ya shut up already? Geez you sound worse than my uncle when he's talking about Itachi!” I snapped, getting irritated with this 'Haku is so great! You can never defeat him!' bullshit. Was Zabuza Haku's fangirl or senpai?!
 Zabuza didn't understand the reference, so he wasn't offended. Though I had now doubt he would be throwing a temper tantrum if he knew how Fugaku was when he was bragging about my cousin. “Fine, but there is one more thing you should know.” I raised an eyebrow and decided to humor him, not that he needed any encouragement, “Did you really think our last battle was just win or lose? Haku had been watching the whole time, watching every move your made with that sharingan of yours. Haku can see a move once and immediately devise a counterattack; it's one of his... gifts. I've been waiting to see the look on your pretty face when you realize that your sharingan has become worthless!”
 I kept my face blank just to annoy him.
 Zabuza held up two fingers, “Suiton: Hidden Mist Jutsu!”
 Deja vu, anyone?
 The thin mist that had already layered the air thickened to the point of no visibility. I cursed, my sharingan eyes darting to pick up the slighted movement in the mist; but all I could see was Hinata and Tazuna fidgeting around, looking left and right for a thin spot in the thick mist. I pinned Hinata with a look. She was twitching nervously and shaking in fear, “Hinata, stay with Tazuna. Don't leave his side for any reason.” I ordered her in a sharp tone. The Hyuuga girl seemed to get over her fear at the order and nodded firmly before shifting from an offensive to a defensive taijutsu stance. I had noticed over the weeks that she seemed to lose her cowardice when given a direct order. Hopefully she would stand by it even if I went down.
 Shuriken came out of no where and I easily batted them away with my closed fan. I took a cautious step in the direction the throwing stars had come from but stopped and twisted around when I felt Zabuza's chakra behind me. I blinked when I saw that his eyes were closed. Was he trying to prevent looking into my sharingan or was it another reason entirely? I frowned when he started to speak.
 “Next time you see me, will be the last time you see anything.” Okay, for Peach-boy, that wasn't a half bad attempt to be intimidating; but still... even goofy Shisui still beat him by a mile. Of course, goofy Shisui happened to be pretty terrifying when someone did the impossible and actually pissed him off, but that was irrelevant. “Without your sharingan, you're nothing.” Zabuza rasped and then disappeared again before I could attack. I twitched in annoyance. If this was just going to be a hit-and-run tactic I was going to murder someone.
 Preferably Peaches; but I would take Tazuna for putting me in this mess in the first place too.
 Fine. If he wanted to play this game, then I would just pull and Uchiha Tactic straight from the Book of Bullshit and own his sorry ass before he could sneeze. I ran through the appropriate hand signs and slammed my palms together with a loud clap, “Fūton: Gale Palm!” In a large ejection of wind oriented chakra, I managed to disperse most of the mist thinning it out enough that I could see Zabuza's faint outline several paces to my right. I turned to face the outline and began a new set of hand signs, “Katon: Great Fireball Jutsu!” I shouted and sent a steady stream of fire at Zabuza.
 I grinned when Zabuza had to leap out of the mist and into my sight, just like I wanted, “I'm sorry, I didn't catch that last part. You left to quickly. Something about me being without my sharingan...?” I said teasingly. Boy, did Peaches look pissed off.
 Somehow that set off a monologue of how Peach-boy had figured out the secret behind the sharingan. I almost started nodding off when he started explaining the piercing eye and the hypnotic eye and how I had used them in battle. Seriously, what was with this guy and explaining things to invisible audiences? Was he so enamored with his own smoker voice that he liked making long winded speeches over obvious things?!
 That would explain a lot of things, actually.
 After he finished lecturing me about things I had grown up knowing, he started talking about his 'ultimate plan to win the day'. Finally I gave up pretending to listen and groaned loudly, “Oh. My. Kami. SHUT UP! At least try to make it harder on me by not explaining your stupid little plan. Dear Lord, do I need to give you the 'a shinobi's lifestyle is deception' lecture I gave Naruto too?!”
 There was a beat of silence when even Haku stopped fighting Naruto and Sasuke, before Zabuza's annoying raspy voice spoke again, “Fine. I just won't give you a sporting chance.” If that was what he called a 'sporting chance' I would gladly go without, if only to keep my ears from bleeding.
 In the back of my mind I wondered who could out talk the other: the Hokage or Peaches.
 The fighting between the three boys resumed with vigor, but something was different about it. I could hear Sasuke using the fireball jutsu as well, which was strange. Didn't he already try to melt the ice and figure out that it didn't work? What could those two idiots possibly be up to? I risked a glance in their direction, hoping that it might shed some light on their plan.
 “Pay attention to your own fight!” Zabuza roared and I snapped my head around with a gasp just in time to feel his foot connect with my jawline. There was a dull crunch and I tasted the sharp coppery twang of blood flooding my mouth; seconds later a wave of pain bloomed from my jaw, momentarily causing my mind to blank. I landed in a heap on the ground, my jaw throbbing painfully. I reached up to cradle it and winced when my hand grazed against the bruising area. The bone was cracked at the very least.
 High killer intent brought my head up and my eyes widened when I saw Zabuza descending from the air, the Kubikiribōchō raised over his head and positioned to bisect me at the waist. Scrambling, I twisted to the side and got my feet under me just as the long blade dug into the ground almost three inches deep. I winced and tried not to imagine what would have happened to be had I been any slower.
 I was really starting to regret pissing Peaches off.
 The Kiri nuke-nin yanked his big ass sword out of the ground and turned towards me, a deranged look in his eyes. “Seems I finally succeeded in shutting up the Uchiha with the runaway mouth. Now to make it permanent.” I couldn't help but roll my eyes at the lame trash talk. This guy was truly pathetic when it came to being intimidating. I was starting to think that awkward Iruka could be more terrifying than this guy. The chunnin might be terrifying to kids, but he was just a socially awkward wimp when it came to adults.
 Peachy disappeared.
 I stiffened and looked around, trying to discern any chakra signal with either my sharingan or my sensory abilities. I swallowed a mouthful of blood, trying not to gag at the overbearing taste of copper, and ran through my options. While the wind jutsu had momentarily cleared the mist, it was back in full force, once again hindering my line of vision. Sight was out, I could deal with that. Peaches was a master of the silent killing technique; he could enter a crowd full of people, kill one person, and be gone before that person even hit the ground–all the while not making a smidgen of noise. That mean I could not hear Zabuza's attacks either and if I did it was probably a distraction. Still I could manage without hearing too.
 That left my sensing abilities and scent. I wasn't a tracker and I was no where near as good at olfactory perception as Kakashi or the Inuzuka clan, but I still had a sharp nose. However, the problem with that was my sense of smell was being overridden by the smell of my blood still filling my mouth. My chances of predicting Peaches next attack were starting to slim down. My chakra sensing abilities weren't the best, it was mostly just raw talent, but I still should be able to pick out Zabuza's large chakra source in the thick mist he had created. It would be like trying to pick out the early morning sun in a thick fog, but it was still doable. Unless Peach-boy suppressed his chakra, I should be able to sense him.
 I closed my eyes and concentrated on spanning my awareness about the bridge. I could feel the chakra of the three boys flitting around inside the ice prison, which appeared to be a thin dome of Haku's chakra, and I could pick out Hinata's still relatively high chakra reserves right in front of Tazuna's stunted civilian level chakra. Wait.
 Hinata.
 Damn it! I had a Hyuuga with me the whole time and I was too caught up in my ego to even think about asking her for help. There wasn't anything that could hide from the Byakugan! And now, I couldn't talk because of my cracked jawbone. Growling deep in my throat I was about to shunshin to Hinata and signal what I needed in my rusty genin hand signs, when the object I was looking for appeared.
 Right where I didn't want it.
  Chapter 15: Not Everything is Black and White
Hinata screamed.
 I gasped as a sheering pain ripped across my chest; blood from my mouth dripped down my chin and joined the splatter of blood already on the ground. I was extremely lucky to have been able to shunshin right where I needed to be in order to take the blow meant for Hinata and Tazuna.
 I reached up to cradle my wound, trying to stop the blood flow, and glared at Zabuza with slow spinning red eyes. Unfortunately he didn't meet my gaze, “Too bad, Uchiha, you let concern for those brats cloud your mind and adding further to the fog that already hinders your sharingan. You're eyes are sharp, but not sharp enough to read my moves.”
 Kami above, why did I have to be injured and listen to Peach Bastard's shitty insults?
 Peach-boy cackled in a cliché villainous pitch, furthering my annoyance with the man. Did Kirigakure hand pamphlets out on how to be a lame antagonist?! “Come on, Uchiha, I want this to be fun!” Can anyone say psychopath? “I want to enjoy myself while I extract my revenge! As for those pest... don't worry. They're at Haku's mercy, no they're breathing their last breaths right now.” Peaches twisted Kubikiribōchō so that the sharp edge of the blade was facing up and he reached behind him into his weapons pouch. I didn't move. “Relax. You'll have plenty of time to weep out an apology when you see them in the next life.”
 Where the hell did he get the assumption I was tense in anyway?
 He started cackling again. My eyes narrowed slightly as he seemed to dissolve back into the mist surrounding us. Peachy's crazed laughter drifted so that it sounded like it was coming from all around us. There was a moment of silence after Zabuza's awful guffawing faded away filled only with my labored breath. Damn this stupid wound, I was going to be in pain every time I got dressed for a month! Not to mention my bruising jaw; I'm not going to be able to eat solid foods for a long time. Plus when Obito sees it, there would be hell to pay.
 Exactly who would pay... that was the question.
 Because I was going to make damn sure that Peaches didn't leave this bridge alive.
 Hinata whimpered behind me and I glanced over my shoulder to see her staring intensively at the ice prison. “N-Naruto-kun... Sasuke-san...” She whispered and took an instinctive step towards the place where her team was fighting for their lives. Hinata stopped and her breath started to shorten with panic, in another moment she would start hyperventilating and I couldn't do shit about it. The one time I wanted to comfort my student and my damn jaw was locked up from the pain.
 Luckily Tazuna stepped in, “Don't worry, Hinata-chan. I have faith that the boys will pull through. That blonde kid... I thought he was just some goofy little brat with the maturity of a two year old. And the one with the attitude, I didn't think he cared about anyone! But I see now that I was wrong. All of you aren't what I expected and, by golly, I know Naruto and Sasuke will beat that masked pest to a pulp!”
 My sharingan eyes darted to Tazuna to convey my silent thanks. The old man smirked at me and reached out to place a hand on Hinata's shoulder. The Hyuuga heiress was looking more confident than she had been, she stood straighter and held the kunai in a tight, firm grip.
 I returned my gaze forward again and I was surprised to see Zabuza's outline among the fog. Maybe he hadn't disappeared as completely as I had thought. Peach-boy laughed sardonically, “You think those punks can defeat Haku? No one has ever stopped his secret jutsu.” Zabuza reached up for Kubikiribōchō and I clinched my fists, wishing that I hadn't lost my grip on my fan when Peaches landed that damn round house kick on my face. I was down to the senbons I had carved out of twigs earlier that week. Against the Kubikiribōchō, they wouldn't do squat. Mentally I ran through my other options.
 When I realized my opponent was Zabuza, I had raided my pack until I managed to dig up my old, worn, and very out-of-date copy of Konoha's Bingo Book. While the brats were out training, I had been cooped up in the room I shared with Hinata, pouring over Zabuza's page. What I had read made me frustrated and ecstatic at the same time. Peach-boy's stats were solid straight across–practically invincible–except for one little detail. Zabuza was below average in genjutsu. As an Uchiha, I was fairly good at genjutsu, but I wasn't the best. Furthermore, Zabuza would be avoiding looking into my eyes which hindered my chance of catching only him in a genjutsu. My best chance was casting an area of effect genjutsu, but that would also endanger my team and Tazuna.
 My other option was that I could also use my hawk summonings that still perched around the bridge, waiting for me to order them around. The downside to that option was that I had to focus my attention on directing the hawks, those small summons couldn't fight by themselves very well as they would attack anyone who wasn't me. I would have to concentrate on making sure none of the hawks went after Team 7. That meant that Zabuza, or even Haku, could bypass me and go for the bridge builder. I supposed I could create a shadow clone to handle the hawks, but I was already low on chakra and that would only eat away at my stores even more. I knew that if this fight was prolonged any longer I would suffer from chakra exhaustion again or worse.
 I needed to end this now.
 My hands rose and I started going through the hand signs for my signature technique, water ninjutsu be damned, when a spike of chakra made me freeze in utter fear. Hot, cold, anger, red... red... red. That chakra...
 vvv FLASHBACK vvv
 “Stay with your cousin, Itachi. I'll be right back.” Mikoto-oba called as she dashed off. I stared wide eyed and frightened as my aunt left. Alarms had awoken me in the middle of the night calling for an extreme state of emergency. Obito-nii was in my room only seconds after the alarm started wailing and dragged me to the Main Branch house, telling me to stay with Mikoto. When I tried to tell him that I was a genin now and I could help with whatever the crisis was, Obito had gotten uncharacteristically serious and ordered me to stay in the house.
 Now the bells were calling for all shinobi ranked above chūnin, retired or otherwise, and Mikoto had left me in charge of my cousins while she ran to respond to the summons.
 Itachi and I sat on the porch, watching ghostly red ribbons float through the sky, and keeping an ear trained on any changes in the constant alarm. Sasuke thankfully was being relatively quite, I wasn't having to try and listen over a brat's soft crying. Itachi seemed surprisingly responsible with his little brother, so I left Itachi was baby duty. I didn't like kids that much; the only kid I liked was Itachi and that was because he was more like an adult anyway.
 My heart dropped when I heard the alarm pick up in tempo and changed to a higher pitch. That was the call for all civilians and lower ranked shinobi to evacuate to the Monument. Whatever was happening in the village it must be bad if it was a village-wide evacuation. I stood, “Come on Itachi, we've gotta-” I cut myself off when I saw my cousin already heading for the compound gates. I didn't even have it in me to be angry at him for leaving me behind.
 I had only gotten five feet when there was a thunderous crash that shook the ground. Itachi and I stumbled, trying to regain our footing and still move fast enough to get to the shelter. Then I felt it. A tangible anger, so hot and violent that I felt sick to my stomach. Sasuke, who had been quietly whimpering until now, shrieked in fear, his small face turning a dark red. I was scared, I wanted to run away and hide, to give into to whatever was attacking. It was the predator and I was the cornered prey, I stood no chance against that anger; that raw, potent Killer Intent.
 Something firm but small tugged at my wrist. I jolted out of my frozen state and stared down at my little cousin. Itachi looked as calm and impassive as he always did, as if he couldn't even feel the Killer Intent infused in the very air–no, it was the air. I was breathing in that powerful anger with every breath until it became my whole being. I wanted to hide. I wanted-
 “Yanagi-itoko, we have to get to the shelter,” Itachi spoke, cutting off my thoughts. To anyone else he might sound bored and indifferent, but I could hear the small lilt of concern in his voice. That seemed to wake me up. I was frozen like a deer downwind of the wolf and here my six year old cousin wasn't even bothered about the attack. He was trying to comfort me! What was worse, I actually needed to be comforted. It angered me, I was weak. A child barely in the academy was more rational than I, the Rookie of the Year, was!
 I promised myself I would never freeze again.
 vvv FLASHBACK OVER vvv
 I concentrated on my sensory ability, trying to determine what would make Naruto lose control. I doggedly ignored the hotredredredthatnightfearmustrun chakra that was the Kyuubi's and instead on the chakra points all over the bridge. Zabuza was a little ahead of me, his chakra thick and languid like honey; there was the smooth, silky feel of Hinata's chakra behind me beside the stunted civilian amount that was Tazuna's. Haku's, hard and sharp like ice yet surprisingly warm, was darting all over the place as he tried to dodge Naruto's crazed strikes. Sasuke's chakra was muted, almost to the point of...
 I snapped my head around and stared as the ice mirrors shattered and Haku came flying out, laid out flat by Naruto. In between the broken shards of the still hanging mirrors I could see a dark lump in the center, not moving.
 ...of death.
 It wasn't the first time I had seen death, and certainly not the last. I wasn't even bothered all that much by it. Except... I was. There was a difference between seeing a teammate die in the course of a battle, when you didn't have time to think or even notice that they had just died; and seeing the body of a child, your own cousin, crumpled on the ground like a thrown away doll.
 Suddenly all the horrible things I had said to him, all the unkind actions and unfriendly glares, all came rushing in like a tidal wave. Like a tsunami. Obito was right, I was a horrible sensei. I had gotten one of my students killed on their first C-rank mission. It didn't matter that it had been updated to an A-rank. I had in essence killed my own student; I had signed his death warrant the moment I didn't withdraw from the mission when it was clear that it was out of Team 7's capabilities. I felt sick, both physically and emotionally. I felt like I was drowning with no life line to pull myself out. I... needed an outlet, I needed to rid myself of all the pent up guilt and anger at myself.
 “Awww... are you going to cry?”
 I found my outlet.
 Slowly I turned to stare at Zabuza, That Bastard, all my emotions draining away and leaving nothing behind. I didn't take joy in seeing him jolt in surprise at my flat gaze, or the way he when white under his tan skin when my Killer Intent washed over him. All I cared about was beating the shit out of that bastard for putting my cousin in the position that killed him. I raised my hands slowly and, almost in a trance, I ran through the hand signs, never breaking gaze with that bastard. I stared straight into his soul and found it... lacking.
 Zabuza's death wouldn't bring back Sasuke, but it would sure make me feel a hell of a lot better.
 I could only hope.
 Demonic Illusion: Shackling Stakes Jutsu. I thought, since my injured jaw prevented me from saying the jutsu. Zabuza's eyes bugged out when he felt the imaginary genjutsu stakes driving into his body, pinning him where he stood. I dropped the last hand sign and started another jutsu. I kept my eyes on Zabuza the whole time, letting him see my cold indifference to him. I wanted that bastard to know that I wasn't killing him because he was my enemy or because I hated him.
 I was killing Zabuza just because I fucking felt like it.
 Katon: Great Fireball Jutsu. I didn't channel too much of my chakra into the fire. I didn't want to incinerate Zabuza on the spot. That wasn't good enough, I wanted to slowly roast him alive. I wanted him to die a slow agonizing death, covered in third degree, maybe even fourth degree if I was feeling merciful, burns for even thinking of harming my baby cousin. I took a deep breath and brought my fingers up to my mouth. I watched dispassionately as Zabuza tried to evade the oncoming fire, I didn't feel the pleasure of watching my prey squirm before I killed them. All I could think was 'how dare you.'
 I noticed Haku too late.
 vvv 3rd POV~ Hinata vvv
 Hinata was frightened. She stood there shaking on spot as she watched the plume of red chakra spiraling out of the mirrors. With her Byakugan activated, she had seen all that had happened. She saw the spike of chakra in Sasuke's eyes and saw the glint of red–the sign of the sharingan. Hinata saw him fall, saw his chakra sputter like a candle before dying out. She saw Naruto lose control, she didn't need her kekke genkai for that. That violent red chakra was clear from even the distance between the boys and Hinata.
 Hinata saw Yanagi-sensei freeze up when she spotted Sasuke's body. Afterwards, Hinata saw Sensei take on a whole new personality. Hinata shivered, with her Byakugan activated there was no missing that cold look in Yanagi's eyes. There was a saying in Konoha: 'The four things any Konoha nin fears are an angry Aburame, a focused Inuzuka, a motivated Nara, and a bereft Uchiha.'  Until now, Hinata had never realized why.
 The Hyuuga heiress clung to her kunai as if it were a religious symbol, she wasn't ready for this. When she had graduated as a genin, she knew there would be death and fighting, but... not like this. She hadn't expected to see her first death so soon, and definitely not her own teammate! Hinata would happily go back to doing D-ranked missions if she survived.
 She hoped she survived.
 But that hope was dwindling into an unattainable dream. If Sasuke, the strongest genin of their class, couldn't survive, then what hope did she have?! Yanagi-sensei had promised she would protect them with her life when they first fought Zabuza, but she had failed. Yanagi had broken her promise. There was no guarantee that Sensei would protect Hinata if Zabuza came after her, Yanagi didn't even protect her own cousin.
 A sentimental fool, that's what Yanagi-sensei called Hinata. Was this what she meant? Sasuke had ran to protect Naruto from being hurt, Hinata saw that, and in turn the Uchiha boy had gotten killed. “If you live past your Chunnin Exam I'll be amazed” That's what Yanagi-sensei had said, had she been right? Were emotions really a hindrance to a shinobi? From the way Yanagi-sensei was going after Zabuza, it seemed like she was right. Emotions were an obstacle to a shinobi, they got in the way of the fight and clouded the mind. Hinata remembered that there was a rule about emotions, Rule 25: A shinobi must never show their feelings. It was one of the only rules she actually knew by heart because it was the rule most shinobi strove to achieve.
 But... did Hinata have what it took to get rid of her emotions?
 Movement behind Yanagi-sensei alerted Hinata and she opened her mouth to call out a warning, not even thinking about it, but she was too late.
 vvv Normal POV vvv
 I stumbled back a step, caught off guard by the sudden body in front of me, cutting of the steam of fire to only a small fireball barely bigger than a cat. Time seemed to slow as I watched the small jet of fire fly from my mouth and connect with Haku's chest perfectly. Surprisingly, he didn't go flying back from the force of the fire. It should have sent him back twenty feet minimum, but he didn't budge a single inch. I stared straight into the kid's brown eyes for the first time, his mask was gone– probably Naruto's doing– as my ninjutsu hit him.
 He looked... peaceful.
 It was Sasuke all over again.
 I had killed many people in my career as a kunoichi, I've even enjoyed it at times. Many of those kills had been children, kids who had gotten in my way; but I never liked admitting to those kills. I always felt ill when I watched the light go out in their young eyes. But... it was necessary for Konohagakure to keep going, so I swallowed my disgust and soldiered on. I didn't look back and reflect upon my kills, I didn't find pride in the high number. I knew that if I did I would never be able to live with myself again. Haku though... he did it willingly. He jumped in front of my fireball to protect the bastard he found precious to him.
 Haku, a Kiri nuke-nin, had the Will of Fire.
 And I almost killed him.
 Almost.
 There was still a chance to save the boy.
 The question was: would I take it?
 He was my enemy, he killed my cousin.
 But he was only a boy... barely older than Team 7. If I let him die, it would be just another Sasuke. A death of a child saving someone precious to him.
 No, I would not let that happen.
 My decision made, I wrapped my arms around Haku and leaped back away from a shell shocked Zabuza. Once the demonic illusion fell, the bastard would no doubt come after me, regardless that Haku was now in my possession. I knew the Peach bastard didn't care for Haku, his sordid little speech of Haku being the ultimate tool was enough evidence for that. I needed enough time to try and heal the kid, at least enough that I could leave him to destroy Zabuza if he attacked.
 I laid Haku down gently and ran a diagnostic jutsu to check how injured the boy truly was. Deep second degree burns across the chest, as well as minor second degree on the right arm and shoulder; but fortunately no internal bleeding or ruptured organs. Not as bad as I thought then. I sighed and allowed my eyes to close a brief moment; I was glad that I had intended to slowly roast Zabuza alive, it had probably saved the kid's life. Haku would need help beyond my capabilities, but I should be able to heal him enough so he would last until I got a medical nin.
 Reaching into my pack I withdrew a kunai, intending to use it to cut open Haku's haori and shirt. Zabuza, however, jumped to the wrong conclusion. “Get away from him!” The Demon of the Mist shouted. It surprised me how desperate he sounded.
 Was... his speech about Haku just a ruse?
 No, I shook my head, I couldn't think like that. It was bad enough that I was healing the boy. I couldn't start going soft on Zabuza. He needed to die, otherwise Tazuna would always be in danger. Haku... once I healed him I would take him prisoner and turn him over to T&I when Team 7 returned to Konoha. This kid was a gold mine of information about the Mist Rebels, and being partners with the infamous Demon of the Mist and one of the rare Kiri nins to have a Kekke Genkai meant he probably had a high bounty.
 I stubbornly ignored the disgust I felt.
 I fingered the pinstriped collar of Haku's bodysuit to determine the patterned stitch. Luckily it was a downward weave, which would make slicing through the fabric much easier for me. I raised the kunai to Haku's neck...
 ...and hissed when a shuriken embedded itself in the back of my hand.
 Zabuza was charging towards me when I looked up to see who had thrown the shuriken. I was shocked that he was even able to move; Demonic Illusion: Shackling Stakes was a powerful paralyzing genjutsu. Only the most powerful were able to move under it, and even then it wasn't without struggle. So how the hell was Zabuza moving as if he was never under the genjutsu?! Genjutsu was supposed to be the nuke-nin's weakness! No time to think about it, Zabuza was already swinging his sword, trying to behead me. I barely managed to duck under the Kubikiribōchō and rolled away from Haku. Zabuza snarled at me and placed himself between the boy and I. His blade raised in a defensive position.
 Interesting.
 So Peaches didn't attack Tazuna, even though he had the perfect opening... again. Zabuza had had the element of surprise. I hadn't known that Shackling Stakes had ended, which meant he should have assassinated Tazuna, and possibly Hinata, before I knew what had happened. But he didn't. Zabuza came to the rescue of his fallen comrade, had even warned me by shouting. And when he had managed to separate us, instead of going for Tazuna or me like one would expect him too, Peaches continued to guard Haku from me. He totally ignored the bridge builder who stood behind him. It was a perfect opportunity to attack, there would be no way I could reach Tazuna in time, both Zabuza and I knew that. And yet, there wasn't a twitch from Peach-boy to indicate he meant to attack.
 Only defend.
 “Yanagi-sensei!” Someone landed beside me. I jolted and looked down at Naruto in surprise. I hadn't even thought of him since he smashed that ice prison to pieces. I was too focused on making Zabuza pay for Sasuke's death, and then saving Haku's life, to even think about the other two genin.
 Naruto was staring at me, “Sensei, what happened to you?!” That's right, the blonde didn't see me get my ass handed to me by Zabuza. He was too busy with the Ice Princess.
 I grunted and pointedly looked at Zabuza, trying to convey my meaning since my jaw was still out of commission. Unfortunately, the Kyuubi brat was too dense to get my meaning. He squinted at me, “Hey, I asked you a question!” I was really really tempted to kick him off the bridge. I was trying to think and-
 “HEY, WHAT DID YOU DO TO HAKU?!”
 That did it, as soon as this fight was over, I was murdering Naruto.
 Zabuza growled at Naruto's demand, but didn't take his narrow eyes off me. The man was finally serious about the fight. This wasn't some little show anymore where we threw a few half assed attempts of trying to kill each other. We were fighting for our students now, and that meant there was no holding back. In the shinobi world, students were considered the last straw. If someone went after a student, they had better prepare to fight for their lives against the master.
 Zabuza was guarding his one and only dying student.
 I still had two students to protect. No matter how much I wanted to strangle one at the moment.
 Tazuna be damned, this was no longer about a bridge builder and some petty shipping company. It was personal now. It became personal the minute Sasuke died, and I sure as hell wasn't letting my cousin and student go without being avenged. Even if I didn't kill Sasuke's true killer, I would damn sure take out the master. If it was the last thing I did, then so be it.
 “What the hell are you doing?!”
 There was a beat of silence before Zabuza and I turned to look at the new speaker. There were very few brave, or stupid depending on how you looked at it, souls who would willingly speak when two jounin level ninjas were releasing large amounts of Killer Intent. It was a well known fact that shinobi weren't mentally stable, and in the height of battle one could easily turn on some idiot who opened his big mouth. I deadpanned when I spied the little midget standing in front of a large crowd of thugs, all leering as if they were something special. Honestly, quantity did not equal quality. Every shinobi knew that, but it seemed that civilians forgot that little fact constantly.
 I could already tell where this was going.
 The midget piped up again, “You're supposed to be attacking the bridge builder, not playing ninja with a whore.” My flat expression turned to one that screamed, 'do you have a death wish?!' Zabuza wasn't even injured and here the idiot was mouthing off to an A-class nuke-nin. What an arrogant little dwarf. I didn't think it was possible, but I had finally found someone more arrogant than the entire Uchiha clan and Zabuza combined.
 Zabuza did not look amused, “Gatou,” Boy talk about loathing, I could feel just how much Zabuza hated the man by the levels of contempt in his voice, “what is all this? Why are you here and who are these thugs you brought with you?”
 This Gatou tapped his cane against the ground. “Well, you see there's been a change of plans.” Called it! But still, this guy was an Idiot, with a capital 'i'. Betraying a nuke-nin who was already pissed off... how did the little dwarf become one of the richest men in the world? “According to the new plan, you die of this bridge... Za-bu-za.” Oi! That was my plan, the little bastard.
 Peaches didn't look all that surprised, “What.” It wasn't even a question. More like a 'Really? You're actually trying that shit?' statement. If I wasn't still burning with adrenaline and anger I would find this whole thing hilarious.
 Gatou leered, as if he thought he was something special. “That's right. You're too expensive, so I decided to take you off the payroll.” See Zabuza? That's what you get when you're greedy. Your rat bastard employer pulls the most cliché move in history on you. “Of course, even these thugs with me cost something, so if you could slaughter a few of them before they take you down, I'd appreciate it.”
 Seriously, how was this guy still alive? Betraying a nuke-nin was one thing, but asking said nuke-nin to kill a few of his hired thugs who were standing right behind him before they 'killed' Zabuza was just asking for it. All it took was one of the thugs to stab the midget bastard in the back and then they could go loot his no-doubt richly furnished home for payment. They'd probably get a lot more money that way.
 But of course, male egos would prevent them all from thinking clearly and they would just battle to the death.
 Delightful.
 Gatou went even further and started adding mockery to the list, “Think you can manage that, Demon of the Mist?” The midget chuckled condescendingly. “Look at you, you look about a demonic as a wet kitten.” Apparently Gatou had never faced a wet kitten before. Especially when they're called 'Tora'.
 I turned to look at Zabuza. Of the both of us, I was the one who was more injured. In fact, Zabuza didn't even have a scratch on him. The only thing to his disadvantage was that he was mentally fatigued from the genjutsu I had cast on him. But like all good ninja, Peaches didn't show signs that the genjutsu had bothered him. I could tell Zabuza wasn't going to last much longer under the insults and blood would soon spill, but he didn't move. He thought I still meant harm to Haku.
 Even if I did, I would be willing to call a truce if only long enough to shut Gatou's damn mouth.
 I struggled to a stand, feeling slightly dizzy which meant that the blood loss was finally getting to me. This fight would be over for me soon, but I still had enough chakra in me to at least heal Haku so his life was no longer in danger, maybe even a little more. I swayed a little as I walked towards Zabuza. The man tensed and tightened his grip on the hilt of Kubikiribōchō. I stopped just out of reach of the big ass sword and forced myself to speak, “Heal...Haku.” I manged to push past my aching jaw, though it was so garbled that even I barely understood it. I really hoped Peach-boy got my meaning, because it was obvious that I couldn't explain in depth. Damn man, why couldn't he break my ribs or something?!
 The Kiri nuke-nin stood there for a moment, I could see in his eyes that he wanted to trust me but didn't dare. Not that I blamed him, until recently we were ready to kill each other. But like every experienced shinobi, we both knew that situations could change in an instant and enemies could become close allies in the blink of an eye. The problem was if those allies would return to enemies once the fighting was done. If I did, which I wouldn't dare, then I would be in the perfect position to off Haku without any intervention from Zabuza.
 By pure luck, Haku whimpered quietly at Zabuza's feet. A small reminder of how close to death the kid was. I couldn't wait around for Peaches to decide, Haku might be dead by the time Zabuza made up his damn mind.
 Unfortunately our conversation drew attention from that grub Gatou, “Ha! So that little brat is dying, eh? Serves him right for trying to break my arm! Do us all a favor, dear, and kill the runt for me, would you? I'll pay you handsomely for your troubles!” The little man asked me. I shivered in disgust and shot the midget a dark look over my shoulder. I hadn't noticed that his left arm was in a cast until now. My respect for Haku rose several notches. Too bad Ice Princess didn't slay the cretin when he had the chance.
 Zabuza narrowed his eyes at Gatou and I mentally laughed at the midget's stupidity. Insulting a man was one thing, but insulting his student when the kid was on the doorstep of death was something else entirely. Peach-boy looked at me with murder in his eyes, but I knew it wasn't directed at me. “You're in luck, Uchiha, our fight is over now” Zabuza rasped. My mouth twitched into a brief smile, but I let if fall when even that hurt. Peach-boy raised his voice so the rest of the people on the bridge could hear him, “since I am no longer in Gatou's employ, Tazuna is safe.”
 Gatou twitched, obviously infuriated that his little display of audacity was backfiring on him. Did he honestly expect that Zabuza would still go after Tazuna after he cut Peach-boy's pay? That was just arrogant in the extreme. And I was an expert on arrogance.
 I was an Uchiha after all. The trait for arrogance was in our blood just as much as the Sharingan was.
 Quietly I knelt beside Haku again and nicked a small cut in his collar before ripping the shirt open. I grimaced when I saw my handiwork. The skin across his thin chest was warped and yellowish. White bubbles dotted the skin like small snow capped mountains; some were as round as coins and others barely bigger than the head of a pin. The burn continued up Haku's neck, fading to a pale rosy pink as it curved up his jaw line and half way to his right eye, looking no more superficial than a sunburn. Haku's upper right arm was a glossy vivid red with sparse clear blisters running along the inside of his arm. Further down the arm, just below the elbow, the burn faded into the same rosy red color that marred the poor boy's cheek. It was honestly a surprise that Haku was still alive at all. The shock alone from the jutsu should have sent him into cardiac arrest.
 I felt Zabuza's heavy gaze on my back and looked up to meet the nuke-nin's glare, “You harm one hair on his head and I will end you.” Zabuza said and for the first time since I clashed with him, I felt intimidated by the Demon of the Mist.
 Wordlessly I nodded and activated the Mystic Palm Technique. I wasn't nearly as good as Rin was, but she taught me the basics of medical ninjutsu. That would be enough to keep Haku alive. He would be horribly scarred for the rest of his days, but it was better that he be hideous than dead. Besides, those who truly loved the boy wouldn't care what he looked like.
 vvv 3rd POV vvv
 Naruto didn't understand at all what was happening. One minute Yanagi-sensei and that peach guy were glaring at each other with the intent to kill, then the weird short guy with the weird hair showed up and started insulting Zabuza and all of a sudden Zabuza and Frizzy-sensei were friends! It was all so confusing and Naruto couldn't keep up. He wanted to scream and make them explain, but Yanagi-sensei would probably knock him upside the head again. And she hit hard!
 Yanagi-sensei was kneeling down beside Haku. She was... healing him. Naruto frowned at his sensei. He remembered what she said to him when she refused to give anything to that sick boy, “I don't see the point in wasting resources to a lost cause when there are more likely cases around that can live.” Naruto didn't know how Haku had gotten hurt, but it looked bad. Almost like Haku-san wouldn't live, even Naruto would admit to that no matter how much he didn't want to. So why was Yanagi-sensei healing a lost cause?! Sasuke! If Yanagi was willing to heal Haku, then shouldn't she try to heal Sasuke too? Naruto looked over to where the body of Sasuke laid, why wouldn't Yanagi heal Sasuke? He was her cousin, and Haku was the enemy; so shouldn't she focus on Sasuke and not Haku? Naruto wanted Haku to live, sure, but he wanted Sasuke to live more!
 “Yanagi-sensei, what about S-Sasuke?” Naruto asked. He wanted to yell, but he could barely even bring his voice above a low mumble. He didn't like the way Yanagi's shoulders stiffened, Naruto's sensei was normally more reserved than that. Naruto could hardly ever figure out what Frizzy-sensei was thinking unless she was mad, so for her to act out of character didn't bode well for Sasuke.
 Zabuza hefted his large sword up onto his shoulder and looked at Naruto. The nuke-nin's voice was surprisingly soft when he spoke, “Kid... your teammate is dead.”
 “Then why...?” Naruto started to ask as he turned wide eyes on his sensei's back. Why was she healing Sasuke's killer?! His blue eyes turned up to Zabuza, wordlessly demanding answers.
 Zabuza only looked away, unable to meet the kid's gaze. Death normally didn't bother him, he enjoyed killing and enjoyed seeing the survivors' fear when he took credit for his kills. But... there was something in that blonde kid's eyes that made him almost feel ashamed of it all.
 The short midget laughed harshly, “Look at you! So soft! Awwww, are you going to cry?”
 Naruto couldn't take it any more. He spun around and leveled a harsh glare at the scruffy little rat, “Shut up!” The Kyuubi container roared. He couldn't stand it! Not anymore! If Yanagi-sensei was going to be a coward then fine, Naruto would take care of those thugs by himself! Screw the shinobi code or whatever bullshit Yanagi spouted at him, Naruto would just follow his own code then!
 Naruto charged forward before Zabuza or Yanagi could stop him.
 vvv Normal POV vvv
 I tried to grab Naruto as he shot off, but I wasn't in a good position. He had been standing behind me and I wasn't at my best so my reaction time was off. I twisted awkwardly and landed on my stomach, my arm stretched out before me. I didn't even come close to grabbing the blonde. Grimacing I pushed myself off the ground and was preparing to run after my hot headed student, when a blur of grey shot past me. I fell back in surprise.
 “You heal Haku, I'll get the brat!” Zabuza ordered over his shoulder. I blinked after him; it was common that enemies would temporarily call a truce to deal with a mutual foe, but it was always an uneasy truce. The way Zabuza was acting... it was like we had been allies for a long time. And that, I did not understand.
 “S-sensei!” I turned to see Hinata and Tazuna coming forward, Hinata's lavender eyes landed on Haku and she swallowed audibly. Even Tazuna looked horrified at the warped mess that was Haku, and I was sure he had seen many nasty injuries during his career in construction.
 No time to think about that. I couldn't deal with those two, not while I was dealing with Haku. In quick succession I ordered Hinata to retreat and continue guarding Tazuna–even if Zabuza said he would no longer go after the bridge builder that didn't mean he would stop any thug going after my client–through basic genin hand signals. There was a chance she didn't know even one of them; the Academy never really went into depth with hand signals, which was stupid in my opinion. It was inevitable that one day all shinobi faced a situation where silence was the difference between life and death. It was at those times that hand signals were an essential tool to a ninja. I would be damned if another one of my students died because I didn't teach them something basic and easy In the back of my mind I added teaching Naruto and Hinata all the levels of hand signals to the growing list of things I should have done.
 Luckily, Hinata seemed to understand me. She nodded a bit shakily and backed up, pawing at Tazuna's sleeve. The old man stood frozen, his eyes on the boy that was slowly dying. I ignored them both as I activated the Mystic Palm Technique again and spread my palms out just inches above Haku's chest. Green chakra seeped into the affected area and I mentally twisted it so that the chakra spread through the skin, going no deeper than the burns. I was in my own little bubble, completely ignoring all that went around me as I laboriously worked to save my cousin's murderer.
 vvv 3rd POV~ Naruto vvv
 A heavy hand landed on Naruto's shoulder before he could get within two meters of the first thug. Furious the blonde kid spun around, expecting to see his cowardly sensei, but was surprised to see the no-brow nuke-nin Zabuza. A small twinge of fear shot through him and he wondered if Zabuza was going to take him out. Naruto could barely hold his own against Haku, he knew there was no chance he could even make Zabuza sweat. Sure there had been that time before, when Yanagi-sensei was captured, but that was with Sasuke. Sasuke was gone now, and Naruto honestly couldn't think of any way he might stand against Zabuza on his own. All his plans included Sasuke.
 Whap!
 “Ouch! HEY!” Naruto yelped and glared up at Zabuza, the person responsible for smacking Naruto upside the head.
 “Stupid. What do you think one little pest like you can do against them?” Zabuza grouched as he grabbed the blonde by his hideously orange jumpsuit and dragged him back a few steps. “You're nothing but target practice to those bastards.”
 Naruto didn't want to hear it, “Shut up! This is all your fault! If you... If he hadn't... Then...” He didn't know what to say, all he knew was this whole mess, from Sasuke to that creepy short guy, was somehow Zabuza's fault.
 Zabuza's answer wasn't helping matters, “Haku is nothing but a tool to me, just like your friend was nothing but a tool to your sensei. You shouldn't linger over his death, it makes you soft. A true shinobi-”
 The blonde growled, “You shut the hell up! I don't give a damn was a true shinobi does. Haku thought the world of you, you were one of his precious people and Sasuke...” Naruto trailed off for a moment, unable to push away the image of Sasuke dying in his arms.
 “Aniki... he's going to be mad at me. He made me promise to... try and surpass him. But...”
 Naruto shook his head fiercely to clear the image of a senbon-riddled Sasuke, his friend, “Sasuke died because of me! And Haku is dying because of you!” Naruto finished with a shout, pointing a rigid finger at the silent Zabuza, “You and Haku were together for years, doesn't that mean anything?!”
 Zabuza's eyes didn't change from their cold flat gaze, “You don't understand the way of shinobi, you're still just a child who knows nothing. I merely used Haku as Gatou used me. He is nothing but a broken tool now, one that will never be the same. A broken tool is a useless one.”
 The anger roiling inside Naruto's gut boiled down to utter disgust. He couldn't understand how someone as loyal as Haku could get mixed up with a rat bastard like Zabuza, “If you really mean that, then you're a bigger rat than I thought. You're worse than Gatou!”
 Zabuza simply watched the kid.
 “Yanagi-sensei said that she wouldn't waste resources on a lost cause, but she's over there right now trying to heal Haku for you; and you say you don't care about him! Haku wanted me to kill him when I defeated him, he didn't want to dishonor you, damn it! He thought the world of you, so much that he was willing to die for you! While he was sacrificing everything for you, you never felt anything for him? What does that mean for me, huh?” Naruto's voice started dying down as the grief he had felt for both Haku and Sasuke began overwhelming his anger, “If I become strong, does that mean I become as cold hearted as you are? Haku almost thew his life away... and for what?! For you and your dream? He never had a dream of his own, but you don't care, you just tossed him aside like he was nothing...” Thick tears began streaming down Naruto's cheeks. “It's just... so wrong...”
 The Kiri nuke-nin looked away, unable to face the genin. “You talk too much...” He muttered under his breath. Naruto looked up, surprised at the tired tone in Zabuza's voice. The blonde kid was nearly shocked to see tears gathering in the nuke-nin's eyes. “Haku was always too soft for this life, and curse you I refuse to let him throw away his life on one as worthless as I.”
 Naruto stared at the man in silence, unable to even think of what to say. He had never meant to actually change Zabuza's mind or anything. He just wanted Zabuza to see how wrong the shinobi way was.
 The man seemed to be smirking under the bandages covering his mask, “What, cat got your tongue, gaki? Or are you so surprised to discover that I'm human? Even shinobi are human, no matter how much we try to escape that fact. That's what your sensei was trying to teach you... but we always fail. Or at least... I have.” Zabuza reached back and wrapped his fingers around Kubikiribōchō's hilt, “Stay back, kid.  This fight is between me and Gatou.”
 There was a brief pause, a small moment of silence, before Zabuza suddenly charged forward with the speed only a shinobi could achieve after years of training. Naruto watched the nuke-nin in awe and horror as he met with the numerous thugs of that Gatou guy and, like a wave breaking on a rocky shore, blood pieces of thugs went flying into the air. Arms, legs, torsos, heads, it didn't matter what it was; but some appendage would go into the air every time a thug thought he had a chance against Zabuza. Naruto suddenly knew how out of league he was, a simple genin, against someone like Zabuza; and he was immensely glad that Zabuza wasn't against Team 7 anymore.
 “Rah! Damn it, I'm not going to sit this battle out like a coward!” Naruto suddenly shouted and made a hand sign, “Kage bushin no Jutsu!” Three other Naruto's popped into existence, drawing the attention of a few thugs that Zabuza left alive to go after Gatou. Their eyes lit up at the sight of an easier target.
 One thug snickered as he took a step towards the genin, “Awww, look. A little brat thinks he has a chance against us. What'chya say, boys? Shall we teach him a lesson?” There was a collect of evil chuckles as each thug brought out their weapons and turned to face the boy.
 Naruto was not amused, “Don't underestimate me!” He snapped and two shadow clones charged forward. While the thugs were busy taking care of them, Naruto concentrated on the jutsu Yanagi-sensei had taught him. He had mastered it, but he didn't even have a fan to concentrate the chakra. Naruto doubted that the jutsu would work without a fan or something to concentrate his chakra, at least that was what Yanagi-sensei had told him. However this was a live or die situation and he didn't have a choice. “Fūton: Wind Blade!” Naruto shouted and prayed to kami that this worked.
 It didn't.
 The thugs laughed at him when nothing happened, “Look at him, you're a long way from home, little kid. What a pathetic-” The thugs' self proclaimed speaker was suddenly cut off when a hawk shot past Naruto's shoulder and slammed full speed into the man's face, its wings smacking the man upside his head. The thug's laughter turned into screams of pain as the hawk raked its curved talons down his face, carving deep bloody grooves in his cheeks, and pecked at his eyes with its sharp hooked beak. He reached up, trying to pull the bird off, but it only fell back for a moment before swooping back in and digging it's talons into the man's neck. The thug fell backwards and laid prone, dead, underneath the now calm hawk as it cleaned it's blood spattered feathers. The whole thing had only lasted a short moment.
 Naruto spun around, his blue eyes going wide as he saw Yanagi-sensei walking towards him. A swarm of hawks flew around her, a cacophony of shrieks and caws. The hawk that had clawed at the thug took flight and landed on Yanagi-sensei's shoulder, looking utterly smug with his perch of honor. The rest of the hawks spread out among the bridge work, each of their sharp yellow eyes seeming to pick a victim to claw the face off of.
 Even though the blonde really didn't like his sensei all that much, he was glad to see her. “Frizzy-sensei! How's Haku, did you heal him?” Naruto asked when his sensei stopped beside him.
  “I don't know,” The tall woman said blandly as she shrugged, “Taicho is healing him.”
 Naruto blinked at her, confused before looking over his shoulder at where Haku was. He was surprised to see another Yanagi still crouched over the older boy's body, green chakra pouring out of her hands and into Haku's chest. Naruto twisted to face the Yanagi beside him, “You're a shadow clone!” He exclaimed.
 Let be known that, shadow clone or not, Yanagi-sensei's hits still hurt. “Idiot. Of course I am.” She cracked her knuckles and made a strange hand sign that Naruto didn't recognize, “You take care of these buzzards, I'll take the rest of the stragglers that Peach-boy leaves.” The hawks seemed to respond to Yanagi-sensei's hand sign and like a storm cloud of feathers and sharp talons, all shot forward after any thug standing still.
 Naruto decided to ignore the horrible screams that were now rising from the masses.
 vvv Normal POV vvv
 Haku groaned quietly under my hands and I sighed in relief. That he was responding meant that Haku was out of danger. I could quit healing him if I had to and not worry about him dying regardless of my efforts. I was already dangerously low on chakra again after I had created that shadow clone to offer some protection and assistance to Naruto. I didn't really trust Zabuza to watch out for the blonde kid and there was no way in hell that I would let another student die on this mission, especially since the two more dangerous opponents were out of the fight. Naruto could handle civilian thugs easily one on one, but no one could survive being overwhelmed. Even by wussies like Gatou's so called bodyguards.
 “Otou...san...” Haku wheezed. I frowned at the boy as he lolled his head away from me, his eyelids fluttering uselessly. Who the hell was Haku talking- I looked behind my shoulder where the training dummies were getting their asses handed to them by Zabuza. Did Haku think of Zabuza like a father? That would explain his suicidal behavior when it came to protecting the kenjutsu master.
 The boy's eyes suddenly snapped open and he tried to sit up. I cut the healing chakra to pin him to the ground and gave him a wordless stern look in hopes to convey my meaning. Haku's chocolate brown eyes glared back at me. I noticed that his right eye was blood shot from capillaries that had burst when I hit him with the fire ball, and felt a twinge of guilt at the reminder that I had almost killed the kid. Had I not wanted Zabuza to suffer painfully, I would have killed Haku. Strange to think that my thirst for revenge had saved someones life.
 ...I was signing up for therapy when I got home after this.
 Haku looked away first. He looked strangely unhappy. I blinked down at my impromptu patient, confused as his change in mood. I had been expecting anger or... something other than sadness. “Let me die...” Haku rasped quietly.
 I raised an eyebrow and leveled a flat look at Haku. I wasn't going to let the kid die, not after going through everything to keep him alive. I was almost at the point of chakra exhaustion again, damn it! And this little brat had the gall to ask me to kill him. I got it that Zabuza basically raised the gaki only think of himself as a tool, but every human should have some self-preservation. And if this was Haku trying to get away without having to face the fact that he killed my cousin then I say he could go screw himself.
 Instead of answering, since I really couldn't anyway, I reached into my weapons pouch and brought out a roll of bandages Rin forced me to keep on my person at all times. Without meeting Haku's gaze, I gently lilted his head forward and began wrapping the slim bandages around his skull so that they covered his right eye. I didn't have the medical talent to heal capillary blood vessels, his eye would have to heal naturally, or at least until he got better help.
 The ice user reached up and grabbed my wrist with a surprisingly strong grip. I paused in my work and met Haku's single uncovered eye. “Kill me.” He hissed. By his grimace I guess that the boy's vocal cords had been damaged as well. With my free hand I activated the diagnostic jutsu and laid my palm against Haku's throat. Despite his pleading for me to kill him, Haku tensed when he felt my touch. I couldn't help but smile inwardly at that. Any good shinobi didn't like having their neck exposed, it was a sign of helplessness and defeat.
 Withdrawing my hand after scanning the damage, I went back to work wrapping Haku's eye up. It wasn't serious, something more like a sore throat than an internal burn. Haku's grip on my left wrist tightened almost to the point of breaking it. I glared at him, if he didn't let me go I was going to make him seriously regret it. There was only so much touching a jounin could take before their temper snapped.
 The boy quelled under my full glare and he released my wrist in a hurry. I might not be able to talk at the moment, but I could easily get my point across with glares.
 “I'm useless now...” Haku whispered after a moment of silence. I rolled my eyes and contemplated the consequences of knocking the Ice Princess out. Since Zabuza was a little busy at the moment he might never know, but there was always the risk of Haku tattling on me.
 Best not risk it.
 “Shutit.” I ground out, not even bothering to enunciate my words clearly. I hated the kid for killing my cousin, but it wasn't Haku that I wanted to kill in revenge. It was Zabuza for taking such an innocent child like Haku and twisting his rare loyalty into something ugly. But if it was that manner of thinking then I couldn't blame Zabuza either, I realized. It was Kirigakure for creating so many monsters like Zabuza, for teaching children that death wasn't just a part of life, it was something to enjoy.
 I loathed the Bloody Mist.
 Haku started begging, “Jounin-san... please.”
 I shook my head. I would not give in to his demands. I refused to kill the child, if only because I didn't want to see my work and efforts to keep him alive go to waste.
 “Frizzy-sensei! Haku!” Naruto's joyous yelp sounded from further down the bridge. I shifted to look at my blonde student bounding towards us. Behind him Zabuza followed at a more sedated pace, Kubikiribōchō on his shoulder gleaming red with blood and gore. My summonings were scattered among the dead, feasting upon their reward for helping me. I couldn't suppress the grimace at that. I had always been slightly revolted at the contract I held with my summons: that anytime I called them into battle they got the remains of any flesh left.
 My shadow clone was crouching even further back, close to the edge of the bridge where a small lump that no hawk touched laid; I was guessing it was the remains of Gatou. I had given her orders to get something with Gatou's writing for purposes I intended to use later.
 A soft scrap of someone's sandal against the rough ground brought my attention back to what was in front of me. Zabuza stared down at me passively, his face bandages splattered with the scarlet blood of his enemies. He glanced at Haku laying beside me, who looked away, then back at me, “I suppose you held up your end.”
 I wasn't going to try and ask what he would do if I hadn't.
 Instead I looked at Naruto where he knelt beside me and jabbering endlessly to the silent Haku. The kid had seemed to forget that the ice user had killed his teammate, but I wasn't going to point it out to him. I wasn't that cruel.
 Placing a hand on the ground, I slowly got to my feet carefully concealing any sign of struggle from Zabuza. We might be allies now, but until I could secure the alliance it would remain unsteady and must be treated as if it were a wild animal. I did not trust Zabuza in the slightest and I could only expect the same regard he had towards me.
 Besides, I didn't want that bastard's help.
 My shadow clone was coming back towards us. Our eyes met, her red against my black, and she nodded before turning to Naruto, “Hey, bratling, go find Hinata and make sure Tazuna is secure.” Naruto twisted around to stare at the shadow clone then at me standing beside her. I narrowed my eyes at him in a silent threat. Clone Yanagi was still his sensei, just as a copy of me. The brat had better get used to taking orders from my clones just as much as as he took orders from me.
 Naruto quickly scrambled to do my bidding, leaving Zabuza and Haku alone. I turned my back on the nuke-nin pair and brushed passed the shadow clone, dismissing her as I went. I had another matter to attend to, and it wasn't a pleasant one. I did not wish for either of my remaining students to be around as I stored Sasuke's body in a storage scroll like he was a common bounty.
 The area where Sasuke had died was further back on the bridge, away from where the fighting had taken place. My little cousin laid where Naruto had left him, senbon needles still sticking out of him like some sick attempt at a porcupine. He looked like he was still in pain, his pale face scrunched up and etched with fine red lines from stray needles grazing his skin. I stared down at Sasuke, feeling empty.
 Uchiha do not show sadness; they use their grief as a tool to fight. We were the strongest clan in Konoha, we must lead by example. That was what every Uchiha child was taught long before they even entered the Academy. Emotion was a liability and a hindrance. Tears are a sign of weakness. Something Kakashi-nii pounded into my head at an early age; further cementing Uchiha teachings. I never really bothered with it all though. My short temper was an emotion and one I readily applied to almost every situation I came across. I used it to my benefit though, instilling some small level of fear among those I could. On that small foundation I built my entire reputation. I was ruthless, vulgar, quick tempered, and more arrogant that most Uchihas on a good day; and I was proud of that.
 I wanted to feel sad that Sasuke was gone forever, but I couldn't. Regret, yes. Regret that I hadn't taught him more to keep him alive. Disappointment in myself for living up to Nii-san's prediction and being a horrible sensei. Anger that I wasn't tearing Zabuza and Haku apart right now for killing the boy. But no grief. I had seen too many children die already, what was one more?
 Even if he was my cousin.
 Slowly, I knelt by his body and pulled out a premade storage scroll used exactly for this purpose. I had no talent for fuinjutsu, so I relied on other people to make them for me. I mildly wondered if Nekobaa would be sad to know that one of her body storage scrolls was being used on her favorite little Uchiha and if she would be disappointed that Sasuke would never complete that Paw Encyclopedia she always talked about when I visited her.
 I unrolled the scroll and laid it down beside Sasuke's corpse. There was no time to ponder useless things. With a gentleness I knew Mikoto-oba would expect, I lifted her dead little boy and laid him on top of the seal's focus point. I sat back and studied him before absently pulling a senbon needle from his shoulder. I knew that his family would not appreciate seeing the weapons that killed him, I should pluck them before sealing Sasuke's body. I reached for the senbons in his neck, feeling that those were the most demeaning. After all, good shinobi didn't like having their neck exposed.
 There.
 I froze, not sure what the hell I was feeling. Not a heartbeat, Sasuke's heart had long stopped, that was sure of it. But... warmth. Chakra. Life. Like a small ember still clinging to the warmth of flame, determined not to burn out and become a lowly lump of coal. Steady, waiting for that extra push to turn back into a brilliant fire. There was still a chance to save my baby cousin. I was low on chakra, what I gave possibly couldn't help, but if might keep that ember flickering for just a while longer until someone could stroke it alive again.
 Screw it.
 I laid my palm flat against Sasuke's chest and pushed what remaining chakra I could spare into his coils. It wasn't much, but I felt his heart flutter beneath my fingers like a caged little bird. Good, then he no longer needed help, Sasuke could make it back to us on his own.
 Which was excellent, since I was passing out again.
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gowns · 5 years ago
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i’m re reading anais nin’s henry and june and i did the math and she’s around 27-28 years old throughout the course of those diaries ... which reminds me that, yes, she’s very smart, and i don’t think i was as smart as her, in hindsight. i think i’ve always been a dumbass. but then something that kinda strikes me as i’m reading is how self-centered she is? how prone to endless obsession... which i get because it’s about this crazy bisexual limerence but it’s also like, damn. 
like i remember that feeling and it’s weird to be in my 30s and to think... that i’ve grown and matured EVEN over the course of 3 years. i told matt that looking at my old camera roll brings that difference in maturity to light... and that i can’t help but feel that having a kid has a lot to do with it. not that having a kid is the “be all end all” of anything, more that up until that point, you’ve only been living for yourself. (at least, most people are. and i now feel that i was.)
i think i was very scattered before... interested in everything and anything, specializing in nothing, not able to accomplish anything, really. like one of my old facebook posts popped up today too where i was complaining about freelancing and how i wasn’t making any money. but like, i wasn’t really trying, and i was answering “yes” to all the stupid dumb peanut gigs that were preventing me from having true focus. i was “busy” but not making a living. living off credit cards. now i can’t believe, in retrospect, how little self-respect i had; how little regard i had for my talents. 
and now i’m (almost) 31 and reading books and doing Exercises in that older-person/Winnie-the-Pooh way, like if I don’t get up and stretch and move a bit, my decaying bones are literally going to disintegrate. so i stand in my living room and wave my arms in little circles and try to touch my toes.
i’m working on marketing right now. i have a business coach. my income is increasing bit by bit. it’s all terribly stupid and wrong in the abstract — being a leftist, knowing that capital is bad, poison, etc — but when it comes right down to it, i was using my leftist stance as a defense to pretend like i didn’t have to make money, that i was only worth a few dollars here and there. and now i know that i Live in A Society and i need money, i need cheese for my egg. so i’m gonna make it. 
let’s see. what else did i learn. hmm. you don’t have to hang out with people who pretend they like you. you don’t have to pretend to like people. you don’t have to do endless favors for friends. you don’t have to call back your parents immediately, you can wait. but also: you should call them back, because, even though they’re crazy, they still worry about you. you were once their egg. 
i’m in a very slow process of breaking my internet addiction. it’s hard. oh boy it’s hard. it’s hard because even squares are using it all the time. (you know — like 15 years ago, you were weird if you were Online, now it’s like, every room that i walk into, everyone is on their phones, plugged in.) but it’s good to resist it. even if you resist it 50% of the time. here’s what i remind myself: 
“you exist in the world, not the phone” “that’s a fake world” “when you die you’re going to have a last vision of how much time you spent online and how little time you spent with things like the taste of cherries” “don’t you have a stack of books to read” “why don’t you try just sitting and observing 5 things” “i know you’re bored. try to just be bored”
because when i see everyone on their phones i can’t help but feel like it’s the equivalent of people who grew up in the 50s remembering their parents drinking and always having a cigarette in their hand, vaguely knowing that it was bad and killing them but doing it anyway, and sure enough it killed them. my kid is going to conjure up memories of me and i’m gonna be on my damn phone in at least some of them. 
so if it’s like chain-smoking — let’s say i’m down from 3 packs a day to 1 pack a day. still very terrible, but i’m resisting. i’m existing. i’m getting older and everything is decaying and i’m just sitting for a moment, breathing, listening to the clock ticking, not watching or clicking a goddamn thing.
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rancher-dan · 4 years ago
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In you're post where you talked about stuttering during a lecture probably. people with actual stutters don't have "particularly bad days" it's either bad all the time or not that bad all the time it's not like you can go "oh my stutters getting worse, must be raining." fucking ablest
You know, I would put the “we don’t have enough time to unpack ALL of that” thing but I do have enough time and I will unpack all of this. 
1. your :)
2. False. As all disabilities go there are days when it’s bad, there are days when it’s not so bad, there are days when you almost forget you have the damn thing at all. That’s part of it. Considering I also have chronic pain adhd, anxiety disorder, ptsd, and depression I sextuple know this.
3. You’re absolutely right, I wouldn’t say “oh my stutters getting worse, must be raining.” I’d say “o-oh m-m-my st-st-st-st-st-st-st-stu-t-t-ter-er-ers g-g-g-et-t-tin-ing w-w-wo-worse, mu-mu-mu-must-t-t b-b-be r-r-r-ra-a-ain-n-nin-in-ing-g.”
4. I don’t, uhm, I don’t know how you thinking I’m lying about having a stutter makes me an ablest tho.
In conclusion, congration, you made yourself look like a dumbass. 
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akirenhell · 5 months ago
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No one:
Absolutely no one:
Trent Reznor and Richard Patrick during the early years of Nine Inch Nails:
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iamtryingtobelieve · 8 years ago
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NIN Challenge 2.0 Day 4
Me being a dumbass, I forgot to do this yesterday so enjoy this double post :)
Day 4 - Favourite Songs From Broken April 20th 2017 April 21st 2017 Overall, I do love the Broken EP but not as much as I like the other albums. Fixed on the other hand, is one of my favourite remix albums
BE WARNED SQUEAMISH PEOPLE: SOME OF THE LINKS HERE ARE TO THE BROKEN MOVIE VERSIONS OF SEVERAL MUSIC VIDEOS SO CLICK AT YOUR OWN RISK!
5-Happiness In Slavery I tried my best not to combine songs as I have a habit of doing that however Happiness and Hell are two things that I need to listen to together for full effect but they also stand alone very well. Anyhow, this arguably the most heaviest and noisiest NIN track to be created, one part about BDSM and one part about Trent getting metaphorically fucked by his record label TVT.  I wish Trent would play this live again or at least do a merger like he does with Closer and The Only Time, he did it once with The Great Destroyer
4-Help Me I Am In Hell  Hands down my favourite instrumental from Broken, I just love this song so much that words can’t really describe it. The music video I just fucking love with the suited guy being forced to contain his desires and eat flies and steak whilst wishing he could be in bondage. I love whenever they play this live too adding the drums in or even the cello. 
3-Gave Up Behold perhaps the most fucked up NIN video ever created. For those who haven’t seen the Uncut version of Gave Up, you are in for a treat and I won’t spoil the fun for you. Song-wise, I really love this song. One of those all time great moshing songs and just fun to sing/scream along to. 
2-Last My favourite song from the main EP track list, admittedly it took a while to grow on me but nevertheless I absolutely adore it. I wish there would have been a music video made for it for The Broken Movie but then again I wonder what Trent and Peter’s mind could have conjured up for this song. It’s on Rock Band and is a bitch to play on bass but other than that I do really love this song.
1-Suck This is a cover from a side project that Trent had due to his record label screwing him over as he refused to record as NIN. Originally written for the band Pigface, the song became more popular as a NIN release and is often still performed in concert to this day. This is my all-time favourite from Broken, especially for the bridge, chorus and finally the last little verse. Shivers every time I hear Trent saying that he wants to do terrible things to me.
Honourable Mentions: Screaming Slave Happiness In Slavery (Fixed) Throw This Away Last (Butch Vig Remix) and Fist Fuck
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spadecentral · 2 years ago
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👬 Two For the Count | Ace Trappola x Deuce Spade
>> requested: no >> a/n: this idea was from @marshmedow's pinned post!! i loved it sm i had to write it, i hope you don't mind
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>> masterlist: here!! >> summary: fatal crashes never end well >> reader prns: n/a >> warning(s): hospitals; death; medicine; suicide
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"C'mon Ace," Deuce pulled on his boyfriend's arm. "Let's go!"
Ace had promised Deuce that he would finally go on a ride on Deuce's Magical Wheel, and this was finally the time.
"Yeah, yeah," Ace rolled his eyes as he tried to buy time. He was never particularly fond of the vehicle, always being worried about Deuce whenever he went on it, and now that he was going on it he felt an extra sense of dread.
Reaching the Magical Wheel, Deuce smiled. "Well, here she is in all her glory."
"I uh, I see," Ace coughed. "And how long will we be... riding this thing?"
"Maybe thirty minutes? I don't know." Deuce shrugged. "Here! You can wear my helmet."
Ace held the helmet in his hands before asking, "Shouldn't you have a helmet too?"
"Don't worry, I've been riding this thing for ages! I'll be fine."
"Dumbass, you need a helmet." Ace let his worries get the best of him.
"Trust me," Deuce whined. "I'll be fine."
"If you die, it ain't on me, alright?" Ace joked.
"Whatever you say," Deuce said as he rolled his eyes. "Now get on!"
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Ace stared with wide eyes as he and Deuce got on the open road. Occasionally, Ace would spit out a piece of Deuce's hair that got into his mouth. And other than the small reach that never fully landed on Deuce's handlebars, Ace was practically stone-still.
"You alright back there?" Deuce smiled.
"I'm great!" Ace said, but Deuce knew that he was uncomfortable by the way his voice cracked.
"Let's get something to eat then," Deuce slowly sped up, looking for the nearest shopping mall.
"With what money, loosey-deucey?" Ace smacked Deuce's side.
"Oh, yeah." Deuce looked away from the road and up at the sky. "What should we do then..."
But Ace could focus on nothing but the road. And when there was a slight slowdown in the cars in front of them, Ace's only instinct was to turn the Magical Wheel.
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Ace was lucky that he made it out with only some minor injuries. He was grateful to Deuce for giving him his helmet.
Deuce was... not as fortunate. It pained Ace to see his boyfriend hooked up to several monitors and a ventilator. Several of Deuce's bones were broken, and there was no chance of him waking up soon.
Ace spent every second of his life in that hospital room until Deuce woke up. The other first years tried to get him out, get him to take a walk around the hospital gardens. Even Riddle tried. The best Trey could do was get him to brush his teeth. But other than that, he wouldn't budge. Ace didn't want the first thing Deuce to see when he woke up to be an empty room.
But, not everyone wakes up from fatal Magical Wheel crashes.
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When Deuce Spade died, Ace's world shattered. He cried and wailed. He wouldn't let go of Deuce's cold hand. It took three nurses plus Riddle to get him away from Deuce so they could take him off the bed.
He hated everything and everyone. He wouldn't... no, couldn't go to Deuce funeral. He didn't want to embarrass himself anymore than he already did. A crying fool who lost his best friend and his boyfriend, both in the same second.
Eventually, he had to go onto antidepressants because of how much his mood changed. And the first pill bottle was all he needed. No refill necessary.
That bottle would be held in his hand until the next morning when Trey barged into his room to finally make him brush his teeth.
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Ace wouldn't be brushing his teeth the next morning. Not ever.
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>> twst taglist: @tulipluvlettr | @ghost-hyacinth | @oseathepebble | @ventisaircurrent | @epelys | @pastelmages | @xphantasmagoriax | @atlasnessie | @divinesapph | @ze-maki-nin | @booming-spam | @cupids-chamber | @queerlordsimon | @kyraxiyn | @rayisalive
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akirenhell · 7 months ago
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Late night idea: Trent Reznor is a tuxedo cat.
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akirenhell · 6 months ago
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akirenhell · 2 months ago
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Everybody gangsta until the autistic fellows get brainrot about the "Fist Fuck" guy
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akirenhell · 6 months ago
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The contrast between how people saw Trent in the 90s. vs how we see Trent nowadays is the wildest and funniest thing ever ngl.
Cause like, almost everyone in the media was calling him this "demonic, dark, brooding, scary guy that is actually nice and polite" (and he is nice and polite), but nowadays, we just call him "creature" or "babygirl" and then we picture him as a catboy.
I think that's an upgrade tbh
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