#My Ukrainian is not as good as I’d like it to be so I will say this in english:

[mmmairon]

Бажаю Щасливого Різдва!🌻🎁

[merrymorningofmay]

thought i’d share another thing i made here :’)

i started working on this thing back in january, as russian troops were gathering around our borders, and i got around to finishing it a couple months later, after they retreated from kyiv and my lucky family and i were able to get back home.

for half of the process i was asking myself, “is making this even worth it if it’s going to be bombed to ashes in a couple of weeks?” (the answer was yes); for the other half, i was asking myself how and why do you even make a house now that there are dead and gutted houses all around (the answer was “well, what else is there to do anyway”).

was aiming for the “small ukrainian granny’s apartment” vibe with soviet era “ugly 70s brown” color furniture and a bit of a witchy/magical realism touch :’) details + a bit of ukrainian folk trivia below!

featuring:

a little pot with a star in it, because stealing stars from the sky and storing them in pots for their evil little purposes is a classic ukrainian witch thing;

eastern orthodox icons, because every respectable ukrainian granny has those in her house + massive church-sanctioned witch hunts were never really a thing in ukraine and a witch is likely to have as amiable a relationship with god and saints and angels as with chorts (demons);

portrait of taras shevchenko, adorned with a rushnyk, because, again, can not be a proper granny apartment without those;

a blooming fern, because fern bloom is a Thing in ukrainian folklore (leads you to a hidden treasure, protects you from evil magic, brings you good luck, all that stuff);

a calendar booklet. it has recipes, farming + (dubious) medical advice, lame granny jokes, and shows February 25, because we’re still stuck in February 24 and hoping for the next day to arrive;

a mysterious tiny door. that rune means “heritage,” and i thought that a witch’s inheritance would warrant a little spooky door to keep it safe (also, our heritage is precisely what russia is trying to take away from us right now, so the concept has a special meaning to me);

fashionable pink slippers!

bonus: a CREATURE

[captainlexapro]

Tkachuky Derby & Hughesapalooza - 2024

*click for better detail- apologies for the lighting and general quality of the pics 😓!!*

acrylic on paper

please don't steal or repost 💚

inspired by this tweet specifically (plus credit to the earliest twitter mentions i could find):

Made these for my fellow brothers bowls enthusiasts!! Especially those who know it’s all about the intricate webs of familial narratives in athletics. and the concepts of destiny and talent. and brothers as both allies and adversaries. and the bonds between siblings. and…

links to inspo, reference images, and other thoughts below the cut!

THEY'RE DONEEEEEE!! 😭🙌 i spent probably 2-3 full days' worth of time from concept sketches to final products. so much paint. so much frustration. they're still not perfect - there's little issues on both (if you notice something, i promise i'm aware of it!!) but 'fixing' stuff in acrylic often leads down a rabbit hole and i just had to call it and be done.

there's intentional little details on both - let me know what you catch! hopefully you can see them okay 😅

*i know they play each other more than once per season but i only wanted to make these for their first '24-'25 meetings)*

Let's get some whimsy up in here now, boys!

Derby:

team colors - Panthers Senators

matthew reference

brady reference

Kentucky Derby posters inspo

I wanted to keep the derby poster more 'clean' graphically. lots of derby posters have sharp lines of color and lots of movement, so i knew i wanted large swaths of the team colors somehow (thanks to the ppl that voted on my poll for what the team color shaping should be! i did follow the winning choice lol) chose poses where they look like they are moving in the direction of the 'flow.' generally wanted to keep focus on the idea of matthew vs brady, so i have them 'looking' across the way. was originally going to put in outlines of skylines for cities relevant to them, but that proved to be way too big of an undertaking so i scrapped that idea and came up with some different references. put some detailing for each of them that i'm reallyyyyy hoping you can see when you like zoom into it, but here’s some closer pics:

their last name is ukrainian for weaver, so i wanted to put a little nod to that somehow. not sure it will translate/be clear to viewers, but i limited myself by making the poster so damn small...*I* know they're there and can see them lol if it's not clear to ppl i will come back here and explicitly say what they are lol

Palooza:

team colors - Devils Canucks

luke reference

jack reference

quinn reference

Music posters inspo

inspired by lolla/music posters. wanted a more 'fun' vibe overall. while the derby poster would be more for say like, putting on a wall or hypothetically used for marketing purposes, palooza was more marketing poster and maybe on a t-shirt, too. definitely wanted a calligraphy type font for the name - just felt it out and came up with that shaping. tried to reference lolla a bit. used the devils and canucks coloring - and combo of those (did you notice?) - for the palette. wanted it to be a bit more pop graphic-ish (and hopefully not too cartoony). used some hockey/venue shapes and references, as well as some little hugheses-specific easter eggs...fun fact: the reference pic i used for jack is the EXACT SAME as his nhl25 cover. they just edited it to have the devils' home jersey colors. (i was like wait a second....i know that pose. bc i've been staring at it trying to paint it for hours!!!)

some pics of the palettes and initial sketches:

If anyone has fun nicknames for other nhl brothers bowls, i’d be open to making more posters! Lmk!

If u read all this just know i love u and hope you have a good day 🫶

[pansylair]

hiii your flowerbeasts are amazing!! i looove the way you use colours and shapes, and their designs are so special. are there any specific flowers you were inspired by? also i am in no way comparing you to other artists, your art style is unique, i just wanted to tell you in the best way possible that your flowerbeasts somehow reminded me of the animals in paintings by Maria Prymachenko. she was a ukrainian folk art painter, you should check out her works, i’m sure you’ll like it!

aww thank you!!!

i’d say there was light influence from pansies with their rounded edges and robust colour/pattern variations, i’ve always really loved them since childhood alongside their queer history.

my first flowerbeast art was a pansybeast as well so seemed the most logical step for these guys, you can find it under the flowerbeast tag! (my username is also pansybeast on twitter and would have been the same on here but it’s stuck to a dead account 😔)

i’ve seen prymachenko’s art before and really love it, i need to do a good deep dive sometimes.

i don’t mind you mentioning my work reminds you of hers at all, I’m happy to know as I’m quite influenced by eastern european folk art with my paternal side being hungarian! :)

[zvaigzdelasas]

21 Oct 23

President Joe Biden is making a new case to the American public for shipping arms, ammunition and other military supplies to the wars in Ukraine and Israel. His argument: many of those supplies are made in America — and that’s good for American jobs.[...]

That argument — which namechecked 2024 battleground states Pennsylvania and Arizona — comes as Biden makes a reelection pitch centered on his efforts to create jobs and revitalize domestic manufacturing in sectors such as clean energy and semiconductor fabrication. [...] And now that message includes arms manufacturing. The administration is pushing to ramp up the defense industrial base to pump out more artillery shells, missiles and other weapons for the U.S. and allies. The newest aid proposal, released Friday, includes $61.4 billion for Ukraine, of which $30 billion is for direct Ukrainian military aid.[...]

For Democrats who have been eager to see Biden more actively selling the war supply effort to weary voters, the made-in-America angle is a welcome sign of political vigor. They acknowledge, though, that it is not a sure-thing political wager. “To anybody that actually wants to, in good faith, make the decision, it’s certainly a really important and, I think, persuasive argument that this is about American jobs. It’s about helping actually bolster our entire defense manufacturing enterprise,” said Rep. Pat Ryan (D-N.Y.). “But I fear, and past behavior has shown, the MAGA extremists aren’t actually making this decision in good faith. They’re making it based on Russian propaganda that’s been propagated by Trump and everybody else.”[...]

While Biden’s message might resonate with some voters, it’s not getting much traction with House Republicans who oppose more aid [to Ukraine] at least not yet. Interviews with House GOP lawmakers on Friday showed that even those who feel Ukraine aid is justified aren’t buying Biden’s argument.[...]

Ukraine has been striking Russian logistics hubs using Lockheed Martin’s Guided Multiple Launch Rocket System, or GMLRS, that are partially made in Lufkin, Texas — a city of 34,000 people that saw its paper mill and foundry close over the last two decades.

It’s represented by Republican Rep. Pete Sessions, a Ukraine aid supporter, who said Friday that the U.S. has an obligation to protect Ukraine under its post-Cold War security commitments. [...]

The U.S. has awarded hundreds of millions of dollars in contracts for the High Mobility Artillery Rocket System launchers that fire GMLRS and are made in Camden, Ark., a town of about 10,000 people that’s 100 miles south of Little Rock. Republican Rep. Bruce Westerman, who represents Camden, said critics of government spending can be surprised to know some of that spending is going back to communities like his. “I actually had some constituents text me last night and say $100 billion is a lot of money to give away, and I made the point that a lot of that equipment is made in my district,” Westerman said. [...]

A bigger driver for House Republicans to back Ukraine aid may ultimately be whether they can extract border security concessions from Biden and Senate Democrats. Biden’s supplemental request includes $13.6 billion for security efforts at the U.S.-Mexico border. Republicans are also seeking border policy changes from the administration, and see a Ukraine funding request as an opportunity for leverage. “I’d be really surprised if Republicans wanted to let Russia win more than they wanted our own border secure,” Crenshaw said. “So I think that is the grand bargain that needs to happen.”

[fanartka]

It seems that you are holding on, that all the pain that surrounds you is permeating you, under control. And then you see the pain of a person from your country, but from another city, and it is felt as personal, as general, it is too much and it becomes impossible to contain it.

Here I usually don’t publish anything from my life, from the horror in which we live. Here for me is a place where I can get distracted, live a normal, ordinary life, discuss what I like, share what I want to share. It's so easy to be a little happy here. Warm, friendly place. It’s a pity, I haven’t had much strength to draw lately, I feel exhausted.

We are almost used to it, it has become such a part of life, a routine. As it seems. But someone experiences grief and you realize how many wounds there are in your soul, because they all start to bleed.

I live in Odesa, Ukraine. It's a beautiful coastal city and I'm not leaving no matter what. This is my home. And it is being shelled very heavily because we have a port through which huge reserves of Ukrainian grain sailed to all countries of the world. And to this day our grain, which farmers grow under fire, die while collecting it, feeds a huge number of people. Who knows, maybe the bread on your table has traveled this path.

russian occupiers fired at granaries, at our residential buildings, at civilian facilities, at power plants. They deliberately terrorize civilians to force them to surrender or leave.

A few weeks ago, a shell hit a residential building. The entire part of a residential building from the ninth floor to the first ceased to exist.

It’s good that yesterday I had almost no electricity, no Internet, and no water either due to the fact that the russians again shelled the city power plant, depriving the residents of my city of normal life for some time, because massive shelling of Zaporozhye and other the cities of my country have stirred up too much grief in me and what I could have published yesterday, I’d rather keep to myself. Too much pain and anger.

I will only say that over the past few weeks in my dear Odesa there have been several tragic events that are painfully felt.

In early March, a shell hit a residential building with sleeping people. It seems that this was one of the Iranian "Shaheds" that iran so generously sells to russia. The entire part of house from floor 9 to floor 1 was crushed, many people, many children died. A wife and newborn baby were killed by the ceiling, while her husband and eldest daughter slept in another room and escaped. In this photo, this poor man still hopes that he is still a husband and not a widower, and that he is the father of two children, not one. Do you know what the occupiers do in the comments with such news? They laugh and mock.

A whole family - husband and wife and three children died there. Only the eldest boy, who was visiting his grandmother, survived, and I don’t want to imagine what it’s like to lose two parents and all brothers and sisters.

This house is of a standard construction, there are dozens of them in the city, and at first I thought it was my mother’s house.

I knew about the dead children and it was painful, but yesterday I saw a photo of one of the children killed by the russians and that was the last straw that simply tore me apart. I saw the photo without blur, but if anyone is interested, here is the blurred photo.

My little son sleeps the same way sometimes, curled up. And many kids around the world have such pajamas with Batman. And all mothers try to do everything to protect their children. But I won’t be able to protect my child from an iranian piece of iron launched by russian monsters that can destroy 9 floors. There is no metro in my city, and it is impossible to dig such deep and fortified shelters in a built-up city. All we can do is hide in the corridor so that we are not cut down by glass fragments or shrapnel shells, as happened on March 15th, when these orcs first hit one house, waited for rescuers and emergency services to arrive and then hit him. Terrorists.

I want to say thank you to everyone who supports us, because without your help, they would have destroyed all our cities, as they have already destroyed many on the border with them, along with their inhabitants. I want to say that the UN is the most useless organization in the world, but ordinary people from all countries have shown us what compassion and support is, thank you. And I know several residents of the russian federation who are very pure in soul and are themselves horrified by what is happening, but why the majority of russians so happily supported the war and the next genocide that they are again committing here is a mystery to me. And I’m not interested in solving it, just as it wouldn’t be interesting to sort out the psychological problems of orcs. They do not spare their inhabitants, and destroy their neighbors with pleasure.

I didn’t want to spoil this weekend for you with my grief, my plans were to show some sketches, discuss ideas stored up during the week, show some great screenshots and very beautiful or funny AI generations. But I just can't do it yet. Because sometimes you feel as if most of the time you continue to try to enjoy life, despite everything that happens, as if you are splashing on the very surface of the ocean in warm water under the sun in a cheerful company, and you can temporarily forget about the dark waters in the depths and all the monsters below until they grab you and drag you down.

Our vanished cities

So I think I need to catch my breath a little. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

[they-lived]

20 questions for writers

@theblueeyedfirebender THANKS FOR THE TAG FRIEND I LOVE YOU LOTS 💙💛💙💛💙💛

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

41! (And an additional 37 on ffn 🤪 for a total of 78 just cause I was curious what 11 years of a hobby produces)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

782,267… holy crap 😅

3. What fandoms do you write for?

On my page you’ll find fics for Dragon Age (2 fics), Resident Evil (3 fics), Baldur’s Gate (2 fics), Until Dawn (2 fics), Critical Role (1 fic), Fullmetal Alchemist (6 fics), and Yuri on Ice (25 fics)!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Bloom in the Dark (Yuri on Ice)

Сонечко - Sunshine (Yuri on Ice)

What I Wouldn’t Do (Yuri on Ice)

Truth (Yuri on Ice)

Four Hidden Talents of Yuri P (And His Hidden Achilles Heel) (Yuri on Ice)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I used to not respond because on ffn you pretty much had to dm people to do so which felt weird (especially because I was 11-17 on there and did not want anyone knowing that fact even tho it was pretty obvious in hindsight) but now I respond to almost every comment I get! Fandom is a shared experience and I want to communicate more!!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lessons I Learned From Loving You Alone (Dragon Age) ~ Loghain’s wife had a really tragic life in my brain and I leaned in HARD

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I almost always do angst with a happy ending but I think the happiest is a toss up between Сонечко or As The World Begins to End (which is my resident evil meets pride prejudice and zombies mash up)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I wouldn’t call it hate necessarily but weirdly I get a lot of discourse around Yuri P being Ukrainian but like… I have always written him this way and I always will lol. It’s a part of my brand at this point. For the most part they’re pretty tame comments tho

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yep! Most of the time I use sex as a way for characters to express their indescribable inexplicable connection or just to explore a couple in their most intimate moments. I love smut with funnies too so I try to throw that in there… also yes I do write porn without plot just because I want to lol.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Not really. Closest I got to was As the World Begins to End, which is Resident Evil in a similar world as Pride Prejudice and Zombies, but the zombies and lore were still RE based. It was more inspired by than anything else.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Back in the day someone wrote a fic “based on” one of mine but they just changed the names and nothing else. I still laugh about it because like… what an odd thing to do.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yup! Into Portuguese, Japanese, and Russian! It was very cool and they were so nice!!!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope but I’d be down!

14. What is your all-time favorite ship?

Don’t ask me that my stomach hurts (it’s probably Everlark or Jasper or Otayuri or Royai don’t make me choose~)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I never say never but golly it’s been hard to keep writing I Will Carry You idk why I really lost steam on it. I also have a fic I’m literally 25 pages deep into that was supposed to be a bit fic that I have not posted but WANT TO FINISH SO BAD

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I’m super good at eliciting the specific niche emotion I’m looking to express and hitting the exact topic I want to address. When I want something to be heightened and funny I nail it, when I want something to be bone deep nostalgia I’ve got it. That part is really fun for me personally.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I. Hate. Describing. Scenes. And. Action! My theater of the mind is pretty garbage so when I have to exposit what something looks like I cannot for the life of me enjoy it. My brain shuts off and on autopilot I go.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Even though I am bilingual I still get nervous doing this. Mostly because I’m smol and embarrassed but also because I really have to decide what the purpose is. I love having multilingual characters I grew up on the border between the us and Mexico and I have constantly been surrounded by multilingualism and generally think it’s dope. But I prefer to write the dialog in italics if it’s in another language so my audience can immediately understand what’s going on and have the full picture. If I don’t want them to know what’s being said I simply gloss over it lol

19. First fandom you wrote for?

*Glances wearily at my self insert Harry Potter fic I wrote when I was 12 and had the audacity to post on ffn* … uh… Hunger Games

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Changes by the day honestly but the top 5 are as follows in no particular order:

- As the World Begins to End (p&p will ALWAYS take me out you guys)

- Сонечко (the way I trauma dumped in this one is still so raw and so relevant. The fact that family and love really does win OUCH)

- An Ode to the Daughters of Darkness (first and only attempt at a more poetic style and some of it really holds up)

- Idioms and Idiots (idk I feel like I could turn this into a whole novel it’s wholesome and funny I smile the whole time I’m reading it I love her)

- Long May You Reign (I have reread this bitch so many times since she’s been posted I love the chaos the funnies and the feels. Idk man I just have an insatiable craving for Royai to be parents and this makes me laugh while writing it)

Tagging @masterdisastre @lou-is-lurking @kaleidodreams @weeheilandcoo and anyone else who wants to ✨✨✨✨

[lengthofropes]

I hope this question doesn’t come off as insensitive, because I truly don’t mean it that way, but have you/your family ever thought about leaving Ukraine? Like was it ever a discussion when Russia started their attack?

If you don’t want to answer, it’s fine! Also, i know it’s not much of anything, but I do keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Thank you. And its ok, I can answer that.

Yeah, we had a discussion. I’m pretty sure every Ukrainian family had at least one of those. But you gotta understand, it all comes to not what you’re leaving behind, but whom you’re leaving behind. Because no matter what you do your social circle will be torn either way. Every person has a right to make their own decision, and you just have to respect it.

I didn’t want to leave. My truth is I’d rather die here than leave, because my home is here, this is where I belong. And I kinda stick with this statement to this day.

My father didn’t want to leave too, and he also wasn’t allowed because he was 58 when full scale war started. He wanted to join territorial defense troops. Mom didn’t want to leave the country and nothing in this world would’ve make her leave him so… Also she couldn’t leave her mother and brother.

My sister was completely devastated cause her fiancé was in France, but she didn’t want to leave the country and she couldn’t leave us.

That all was so freaking insane when i remember it…

I also remember how our parents tried to persuade us (me and sis) to leave when the situation rapidly got worse. Jfc I even remember we agreed… and packed, and said our goodbyes… and then just… couldn’t do it…

My sister has left Ukraine in April. She was suffering from continuous panic attacks and nightmares, especially after numerous report of war crimes (r*ape and t*orture) russian soldiers commit on occupied territories. So we collectively decided she should just go and be with her loved one. That wasn’t an easy decision. Idk if you can imagine it, but seeing your sister crossing the border and knowing there’s a good chance you’ll never see her again it’s not something you deal with easily.

So uhh, yeah, now we’re like this. She visits once or twice a year, and we visit her. This year our dad turned 60 so he’s allowed to cross the border now, and he and mom went to see her in France ☺️.

Some of my friends who left and lived abroad for some time are now back. Some don’t. Some leave now.

I’m staying home. I can’t imagine starting a whole new LIFE elsewhere. Just… i cannot.

[zoeyslament]

Christmas in Uranium

A Ride the Cyclone Christmas oneshot I wrote, below the cut. Minor tws for dr*g mentions and swearing.

Oh yeah also it’s Nischa and PerfectDolls haha

I included a “bonus character” in here with a name I headcanon him to have, surprise!!

The first snowfall of the year came on November 25th. The air had cooled down significantly since the Fall Fair, and classes were back in full swing. The Christmas season had begun (despite Ocean’s insistence that it didn’t start until December first) and that could mean only one thing: the choir’s annual Secret Santa Swap. 

“Okay everyone!” Ocean climbed atop the wiggly stool, balancing herself by holding onto a table. She had in hand a top hat stolen from the costume closet behind the stage, filled with slips of paper. “I want everyone to pick a piece of paper to see who you’ll be shopping for this year!” She announced to the choir, who were gathered around her, watching with emotions that ranged from excitement to disdain. 

“I’ll go first!” She dug her hand into the hat, read off her piece of paper, then tucked it in the pocket of her dress. “Ricky, you go next.” 

Ricky adjusted his neon green sweater, which was far too big for him as it was, and reached out for the hat. He smiled when he read off the name, then took the hat from Ocean and passed it to Constance, who took a slip for herself then passed it to Penny. Penny drew a name, looking it over and looking slightly uneasy, then passed the hat to Noel, who took one for himself and passed the remaining piece to Mischa, without unfolding it. 

“The gift swap officially ends on December 15th!” Ocean reminded them. “Happy shopping!” 

“So…” Penny slumped down on Ricky’s beanbag chair a few days later. “I have no idea how to shop for presents. I got Connie, and she’s always making such sweet gifts for everyone, I don’t think anything I could get her could stack up!” 

Ricky looked at her thoughtfully. “I’m not much good at it either, to be honest. Normally I’d tell you to burn the paper in a fire, but since it’s Christmas, I have to be nice. Just…buy from the heart?”

”My heart is a raccoon.” Penny smiled. Ricky glanced at her, but Penny decided not to provide further information. 

“Yeah…right.” Ricky nodded along. “I’m sure you’ll think of something.” He stood up, grabbed his crutches, then started to make his way out. “I’m gonna grab a snack, want one?” She shook her head. “I’m gonna get going, I have shopping to do!!”

”Of course I get stuck buying for Ocean…” Noel grumbled, tossing himself onto his bed and staring up at the fairy lights that hung from his ceiling. “The biggest bitch in the entirety of St. Cassian’s, and I somehow have to come up with a gift she’ll like.”

He rolled over so his head was nestled against his pillow, burrowing into a blanket. “Well, I mean, she doesn’t have to like it, but it needs to be creative, at least. But maybe I should be nice just this one time?” He sighed, talking to no one in particular. “Think, think, what does Ocean like? School, being a bitch, most likely Penny…” he trailed off. He had an idea, and best of all, it wouldn’t take a single dollar!

“Ocean!” Mischa was banging on the ginger’s door a few days into the Secret Santa Swap time. “I need help with swap. It is not easy to buy present. I have no money. And also no ideas.” 

Ocean opened the door. “Mischa it’s ten o clock at night. In December. In Canada. It’s negative four degrees, where is your jacket?”

”Ukrainian men do not feel cold!” Mischa snapped, despite his chattering teeth and shivering form. “Only rage and-“

”Passion, yes Mischa, I get it.” Ocean sighed. “Come inside and I can help you with the gift thing.” She opened the door to her house. 

Mischa’s nose was nearly blown off—the entire place smelled of weed. Ocean seemed rather ashamed of this. “I know that face.” She said darkly. “My room smells better, I promise.” She pointed to a door at the end of the hallway. “In there.”

Mischa opened it up. Ocean’s room was vastly different than the rest of the house—while what he’d seen of the kitchen and living room was messy and grimy and smelled of drugs, Ocean’s bedroom was spotless and smelled of lavender and rosemary, thanks to one of those insense diffusors. The bed was neatly made—a twin sized mattress with pure white sheets and pillowcases. The walls were pale grey, the curtains sky blue, the ceiling and trim were white. It looked like a room you’d find at a rental house, almost as if Ocean put in effort to make it look like nobody lived there at all. 

She sat down in the chair in the corner, just a plain grey armchair, and looked at Mischa. “Who did you get for the swap if you don’t mind me asking?”

He glanced down at his feet, his face a bit red. Ocean got the memo. “Well, you know what he likes.” She said. “But… I feel your pain. I got Penny.”

Mischa scrunched his brow in confusion. “You like Penny? I thought you were…not a girl kisser.”

”The word is heterosexual, Mischa. You would be, erm, correct. Yeah, I must have misunderstood you. But…you got Noel, yes?”

”Yes.” He folded his hands. “What am I supposed to do? He is my poet!”

Ocean bit her lower lip in questioning. “Well, he doesn’t know you like him, right? He’s pretty dense. Not as dense as you, but dense, still. Maybe your Christmas present to him could be…” she mimed a ‘kissy face’. 

“And you could do same for Penny?” He chuckled, to which Ocean huffed. 

“I told you, I don’t like Penny.” She insisted. “Now are you going home or staying here?”

He sighed. “Neither is ideal. Your house smells like the boys’ bathroom by the teachers’ lounge. You know, the one where they-“

”Smoke weed, yes, I know.” Ocean finished. “My parents are really into…that stuff.” She scrambled to her desk, pulled a pack of matches out of the drawer, and proceeded to light another candle. “Perfect.”

“Mhm.” He looked back at Ocean’s. “I think I’ll go home. Smells better there.”

The walk home was tedious to say the least. Ocean lived on the very end of a one-way, dead-end street that led all the way through the woods that surround Uranium City, which, though sparse, were dark and scented of pitch. Mischa kicked up pebbles and sidewalk salt on the way home. The road was mostly clear, but he feared patches of black ice.

”Whole thing’s so dumb. I’ll never find something suitable for poet. May as well just give up.” He muttered, the cold night wind scooping up his words like air beneath a bird’s gentle wings. He remembered what his mother had told him about giving gifts, that the best ones came from the heart, but that was back in Ukraine, when the only person who would even want to give him a gift was his mother. Now, with a whole group of friends, and some very confusing feelings about Noel, this whole gift-giving thing was hard. 

When he finally got home, he was surprised to find the front door left unlocked for him. Usually it was shut and locked tight after his foster parents went to bed, whether Mischa was inside the house or not. Perhaps this was their early Christmas present to him.

He slipped inside and locked the door behind him for those fuckers’ sake, then made his way down the basement steps to his makeshift bedroom, which was really just a futon and a tv positioned on a milk crate. There was a shabby old rug, as well as a cardboard box filled with his foster parents’ old junk: a sewing machine and some scraps of fabric, a half-broken coffee maker, and a clock that was missing the hour hand. 

Mischa sat down on the futon and tore off the clothes he was wearing, leaning back for sleep in just his boxers, when he saw something peeking out of the box of junk: a spool of thread, with a needle sticking into it. Mischa remembered when his mother used to sew with him, little projects, like book-marks and pillowcases, but he imagined he could probably pull something off if he tried. So from that old box, Mischa, still clad only in his heart-patterned boxer shorts, gathered a pile of materials, fired up the sewing machine, and got to work. 

“What on Earth do I buy for someone who spends half his time drinking cheap vodka, and the other half watching slasher flicks?” Ricky stroked the head of his soft grey tabby cat, Buzz. Buzz purred and rolled over for belly rubs, but was no help in the Christmas shopping department. Ricky chuckled. “Everyone needs a cat like you, huh buddy? You’re like…free therapy with fur!” The cat rolled over again, this time sticking his rump up for Ricky to pet, and the boy obliged happily. 

“Maybe Mischa would appreciate a cat,” he laughed, “though I personally wouldn’t trust him with a creature’s life. I’m surprised he hasn’t accidentally burnt his house down yet.” Buzz gave a little ‘mrrp’ sound, as if he was agreeing. 

“Seriously, Buzzy Boy,” Ricky said impatiently. “Feels wrong to buy him, like, alcohol, but what else can I do? It’s not like he has any other interests besides rap and being angry.” He chewed on his inner cheek, staring up at the glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling. “I’m at a loss for words.” 

Buzz leaped off Ricky’s lap, swishing his tail around his body and moving to groom himself with one of his forepaws. Ricky shifted his weight, glancing at Buzz, now down on the floor amongst Ricky’s scattering of art supplies.

Ricky was quite the artist in his spare time. He spent a lot of time making comics about Zolar and the Space-Age Bachelor Man, mostly for his own enjoyment. Then, he was struck with an idea. Amongst his art supplies were some pieces of scrap wood, previously part of a solar system model for class. But if he could cut them just right, paint them…

A meow interrupted his train of thought: Buzz was teetering precariously close to a recent work, which Ricky had done with paints. “No no, Buzz! Your-“

Crash!

Buzz recoiled and frantically tried to get all the paint off of his tail, which just resulted in all of the paint being knocked over. Ricky sighed. Brainstorming session was over, cleaning session had just begun. 

“Connie, whatcha doin?” A small voice asked from behind a door. It wasn’t even seven in the morning the Saturday before the swap, which was to take place on a Sunday, but the Blackwoods’ kitchen was already filled with the scents of fresh baked pastries and sweet fruits. Constance was standing in the center of the kitchen, surrounded by bowls and spoons and boxes of ingredients. 

“Oh! Henry!” She laughed. “Good morning!” Her little brother sleepily rubbed his eyes. 

“Whats with all the yummies? The sun just woke up.”

Constance laughed and set down the bowl of egg whites she was whipping, then scooped up Henry. “I’m perfecting a new cake recipe! You wanna help?” 

Henry nodded. “Can I lick the bowl?” 

She broke out in a grin. “Would I ever say no to you?” She set him down and handed him a bowl and some flour. “Four cups, and make sure you measure carefully!”

Constance had poured years of work into helping Henry become the best baking assistant she could ask for. And he really was incredible at it. A few moments later, she was provided with four cups of flour. “Thanks buddy!”

”What kinda cake are you making?” He prodded her again, tugging at her tattered purple lacy apron.

“Hey! No touching that.” She protested. “You know this old apron is falling apart and you aren’t helping.”

He pouted. “Sorry Connieeee~” he whined, to which she just sighed and smiled. “You wanna see what kind of cake I’m trying to make?” 

“Well…” Constance pointed to a piece of paper she had laid out on the kitchen table. “Take a peek!”

”Woahhhh~” Henry stared at it in awe. “Is that a space cake?” 

The drawing she had made was of a three-tiered cake, swirled with galaxy-hued icing and topped with what seemed to be an alien cat, probably made out of fondant or marzipan. 

“Space cake is an understatement.” She laughed, peering over his shoulder. “This is Ricky’s Christmas present. Think he’ll like it?” 

“He’s gonna love it!” Henry assured her, bouncing back to her side. “What kinda taste is it?”

”Oh, flavour? Marble!”

Henry looked up at her, eyes glimmering in confusion. “You put marbles in a cake? That doesn’t sound like it will taste too good, Connie. Why don’t you make it ‘nilla or chocolate?” 

“No, no,” she laughed, snorting a bit as she did so. “Marble just means it’s vanilla and chocolate swirled together.”

“So there’s no marbles in it?” Henry asked again, just to confirm. 

“No marbles. Wanna taste the icing?”

“Mhm!”

With Henry’s breakfast completely spoiled by sugar, Constance started cleaning up her mess, when there was a knock on the door. “Now who in Uranium is gonna show up this early? It’s seven in the morning! Mom and dad aren’t even awake yet!”

She got the door, revealing the paint-covered form of Ricky Potts in her doorway. 

Crap! She thought. His cake! He can’t know about that! 

Constance stepped out onto the front porch and slammed the door shut behind her. “Sorry. Messy in there. Henry’s baking.” She lied, hoping it wasn’t too blatantly obvious. Ricky, although far from dumb, seemed to buy it enough. “Also, why are you covered in paint?”

”Long story. Do you have stain remover?” 

“Not that I know of. Mom has to go grocery shopping today. You can try Noel though, he lives just up the street and he’s always got all that stuff. God forbid he get a single stain on that dress of his.” She explained. “I’ve gotta help Henry, and uh…” she tried to think of another believable lie. “Sew this.” She fingered with the hem of her apron. 

Ricky nodded along to all of this. “Thanks for the advice, Connie. See you tomorrow, at the secret swap thing?”

”See you then!”

The swap was held at Constance’s house, per her request. Her gift, apparently, was far too big for her to transport very far on her own. When the group got there, Constance was proudly displaying the most massive cake any of them had ever seen, and Henry was beaming as he showed it off. 

“Merry Christmas, Ricky!” Constance beamed as the male walked through the door, “From me and Henry!”

Ricky admired the cake for a long while, and probably would have done so for longer if his duty hadn’t called. He set his wrapped present, which was rather flat and rectangular, in Mischa’s hands. When the taller unwrapped it, he revealed a picture frame. The outside was painted with all sorts of colours and little green money symbols, $, which Mischa was greatly amused by. The picture in the center was of the whole choir at the Fall Fair, their hair all messed up and their faces reddened from a ride on the roller coaster there, just an old wooden one called The Cyclone. 

Mischa grinned. “Ricky, man, did I ever tell you what my mother told me about gifts?” 

Ricky shook his head. 

“She always said hand-made was best. Thank you, Space Jesus. I will treasure it for life.” 

At this moment, Penny shot to her feet. “My turn!” She held out a box, one of the ones that always held clothing when it was wrapped and under the tree. “For you.” She passed it to Constance. 

Constance tore at the wrapping, Henry helping to clean up the scraps. She opened the box and pulled out an apron: pale purple in hue, with little gold, pink, white, and blue clouds painted on with puffy paint. Her eyes started to tear up. “Penny…this is gorgeous…and my current apron is falling apart and…” she enveloped Penny in a quick hug. “You have no idea how much it means.”

”I suppose it is my turn, now.” Mischa held out a very lumpy, unevenly wrapped gift. He gave it a gentle toss toward Noel, who caught it without an issue. He ripped the paper off, and inside was the most beautiful ugly thing he’d ever seen. 

It was many different colours, really: blues and reds and greens and shades of grey and pink and everything in between. Its eyes were buttons, and it took the shape of a bear. Clearly homemade, and Mischa had really seemed to have poured his entire soul into the plush. 

If Constance had made a big deal shedding tears over the apron, than this was worse, because Noel was absolutely weeping, curled into Mischa’s side, holding the plush bear. 

Ocean, who really hadn’t spoken much since this whole thing had begun, got to her feet. “Listen, Penny…” she met the brunette’s eyes. “I really had no idea what to get you, and this really isn’t much…” she held out a tiny box, wrapped in gold paper with silver ribbons bound around it. Penny took great care not to tarnish it too much. 

Inside the box sat a very tiny clay lamb, painted as pure and white as freshly fallen snow. It was gorgeous and shiny and Penny looked at it in awe. “I…Ocean…” 

Ocean smiled. “Is it enough?”

”It’s plenty.” Penny finished. And with that, she shot to her feet, and pecked Ocean on the cheek. 

By the time the redhead calmed down from the little kiss, Noel’s tears had mostly dried. With a satisfied smirk, he held out Ocean’s present, a card, a gift card was what she expected. But when she opened it, all she found was a picture of a dog. A white dog. With the words “I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE” written across the front. On the back side of the slip of paper, Noel had written a note:

Congrats on coming out, Oce. Please kiss Penny before she dies of lesbian pining.

<3 Noel

(meme for reference)

[nicklloydnow]

“And so, as I stand today to receive a peace prize, I ask myself, “What does the world of fable have to tell us about peace?”

The news is not very good. Homer tells us that peace comes after a decade of war, when everyone we care about is dead and Troy has been destroyed. The Norse myths tell us that peace comes after the Ragnarök, the Twilight of the Gods, when the gods destroy their traditional foes but are also destroyed by them. And the “Panchatantra” tells us that peace—the death of the owls and the victory of the crows—is achieved only through an act of treachery. To abandon the legends of the past for a moment and look at this summer’s twin fables, the film “Oppenheimer” reminds us that peace came only after two atom bombs, Little Boy and Fat Man, were dropped on the people of Hiroshima and Nagasaki; while the box-office monster called “Barbie” makes clear that unbroken peace and undiluted happiness, in a world where every day is perfect, exist only in pink plastic.

And here we are gathered to speak of peace, when war is raging not very far away—a war born of one man’s tyranny and greed for power and conquest—and when another bitter conflict has exploded in Israel and the Gaza Strip. Peace, right now, feels like a fantasy born of a narcotic smoked in a pipe. Even the meaning of the word is a thing on which the combatants cannot agree. Peace, for Ukraine, means more than a cessation of hostilities. It means, as it must mean, a restoration of seized territory and a guarantee of its sovereignty. Peace, for Ukraine’s enemy, means a Ukrainian surrender. The same word, with two incompatible definitions. Peace for Israel and for Palestinians feels even further away.

(…)

If my work has been influenced by fables, there is also something decidedly fabulist about a peace prize. I like the idea that peace itself might be the prize—that this jury of wise benefactors is so infinitely powerful that they are able to bestow upon a single individual, and no more, one year’s award of peace. True, blessed peace, not trivial contentment, paix ordinaire, but a fine vintage of Pax Frankfurtiana, a whole year’s supply of it, delivered to your door, elegantly bottled. That’s an award I’d be very happy to receive. I am even thinking of writing a story about it, “The Man Who Received Peace as a Prize.”

(…)

My fate, over the past many years, has been to drink from the bottle marked Freedom and therefore to write without any restraint those books that came to my mind to write, and now, as I am on the verge of publishing my twenty-second volume, I have to say that on twenty-one of those twenty-two occasions the elixir has been well worth drinking. On the remaining occasion, namely, the publication of my fourth novel, I learned—many of us learned—that freedom can create an equal and opposite reaction from the forces of unfreedom, and I learned, too, how to face the consequences of that reaction, and to continue, as best I could, to be as unfettered an artist as I had always wished to be. I learned, too, that many other writers and artists, exercising their freedom, also faced the forces of unfreedom, and that, in short, freedom can be a dangerous wine to drink. But that made it more necessary, more essential to defend. I confess there have been times when I’d rather have drunk the Peace elixir and spent my life sitting under a tree wearing a blissful, beatific smile, but that was not the bottle the peddler handed me.

We live in a time I did not think I would see in my lifetime, a time when freedom—and in particular freedom of expression, without which the world of books could not exist—is everywhere under attack from reactionary, authoritarian, populist, demagogic, narcissistic, careless voices; when places of education and libraries are subject to hostility and censorship; and when extremist religion and bigoted ideologies have begun to intrude in areas of life in which they do not belong. And there are also progressive voices being raised in favor of a new kind of bien-pensant censorship, one which appears virtuous, and which many people have begun to see as a virtue. So freedom is under pressure from the left as well as the right, the young as well as the old. This is something new, and made more complicated by our new tool of communication, the Internet, on which well-designed pages of malevolent lies sit side by side with the truth, and it is difficult for many people to tell which is which; and our social media, where the idea of freedom is every day abused to permit, very often, a kind of online mob rule, which the billionaire owners of these platforms seem increasingly willing to encourage—and to profit by.

What do we do about free speech when it is so widely abused? We should still do, with renewed vigor, what we have always needed to do: to answer bad speech with better speech, to counter false narratives with better narratives, to answer hate with love, and to believe that the truth can still succeed even in an age of lies. We must defend it fiercely and define it as broadly as possible, so, yes, we should of course defend speech that offends us; otherwise we are not defending free expression at all. Let a thousand and one voices speak in a thousand and one different ways.

To quote Cavafy, “the barbarians are coming today,” and what I do know is that the answer to philistinism is art, the answer to barbarianism is civilization, and in any war it may be that artists of all sorts—filmmakers, actors, singers, and, yes, those who practice the ancient art of the book—can still, together, turn the barbarians away from the gates.”

“The survey, conducted from October 19 to October 25, found that 70 percent of Russians would support Putin should he decide to end the conflict this week.

However, if ending the war would include Russia returning the territories that it has occupied and annexed throughout the conflict, only a third (34 percent) of respondents said they would support that decision.

(…)

In its latest poll, the Levada Center surveyed 1,608 people across Russia. The results suggest that 20 months into Putin's full-scale invasion of Ukraine, public support for the conflict has dropped significantly.

The results are significant given that stringent laws passed in Russia in March 2022 made criticizing the Russian military and the war in Ukraine illegal. Many are believed to answer public opinion polls on the topic dishonestly, fearing retribution.

(…)

An August poll by the Levada Center showed that just 38 percent of respondents "definitely" support the actions of Russia's armed forces in Ukraine.

That is in contrast to results from a February 2022 survey from the research organization, conducted when Putin launched his full-scale invasion of Ukraine. Results from that poll, which asked the same question, showed 48 percent of respondents said they "definitely" supported the army's actions in Ukraine.

Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky has said on multiple occasions that he will not comply with the Kremlin's non-negotiable conditions for peace talks, including that Kyiv must accept the September 2022 annexation of four of its regions—Luhansk, Donetsk, Kherson and Zaporizhzhia—following referendums called by Putin that were deemed illegal by the international community.

Ukraine has said that any peace deal must make void Russia's annexations of its territory, and that the Black Sea peninsula of Crimea, which Putin annexed in 2014, must be reversed.

Zelensky has pushed a 10-step "peace formula," which includes radiation and nuclear safety; food security; energy security; the release of all prisoners and deported persons; implementation of the U.N. Charter and restoration of Ukraine's territorial integrity and the world order; withdrawal of Russian troops and cessation of hostilities; restoration of justice; countering ecocide; preventing escalation; and finally, confirmation of the end of the war.

Russia has maintained that any peace deal must include "the entry of four [Ukrainian] regions into Russia," something that Kyiv is unlikely to budge on.”

“The US and Israel are exploring options for the future of the Gaza Strip, including the possibility of a multinational force that may involve American troops if Israeli forces succeed in ousting Hamas, people familiar with the matter said.

The people said the conversations have been impelled by a sense of urgency to come up with a plan for the future of Gaza now that a ground invasion has begun. A second option would establish a peacekeeping force modeled on one that oversees a 1979 Egypt-Israel peace treaty, while a third would see Gaza put under temporary United Nations oversight.

(…)

“We can’t have a reversion to the status quo with Hamas running Gaza,” Blinken, who will travel to Israel on Friday, told the Senate Appropriations Committee. “We also can’t have — and the Israelis start with this proposition themselves — Israel running or controlling Gaza.”

(…)

Israeli officials have said repeatedly that they don’t intend to occupy Gaza, but they’ve also said that continued rule by Hamas is unacceptable after the Oct. 7 attack in which the group killed 1,400 Israelis and took more than 200 people hostage. There’s also little evidence that the Palestinian Authority, which governs the West Bank, would be willing or able to take over Gaza. Hamas has been designated a terrorist group by the US and the European Union.

Ophir Falk, a foreign policy adviser to Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, said, “A number of options have been raised for the day after Hamas. The prerequisite for all of them is that Hamas be destroyed. Once Hamas is destroyed, all the options discussed are based on the premise that Gaza be demilitarized.”

All options hold political peril for President Joe Biden and for other nations, including Gulf States, not to mention Israel. Biden believes that putting even a small contingent of American troops in harm’s way could prove politically risky, according to a person familiar with his thinking, who added that the US isn’t close to making such a decision. It’s also not yet clear whether Arab states might be interested in participating, another person said.

Ultimately, Biden and other US officials say that an endpoint that involves a sovereign Palestinian state is necessary, but exactly how to reach that outcome has barely featured in discussions, either public or private. And Israel says its military operation could last months, and will result in a buffer zone around Gaza.

According to the people familiar with the matter, one option would grant temporary oversight to Gaza to countries from the region, backed by troops from the US, UK, Germany and France. Ideally, it would also include representation from Arab nations such as Saudi Arabia or the United Arab Emirates, the people said.

A second option is a peacekeeping force modeled on the Multinational Force and Observers group that operates on and around the Sinai peninsula, enforcing the terms of the peace treaty between Egypt and Israel. Israel believes that this idea is worthy of consideration, according to a person familiar with the matter.

A third option would be temporary governance of the strip under a United Nations umbrella. This would have the advantage of the legitimacy bestowed by the UN, but Israel views it as impractical, according to a person familiar with Israel’s thinking, who added that Israel believes that little good has come from the world body.

Earlier this month, Israeli Minister Benny Gantz labeled UN Secretary-General Antonio Guterres a “terror apologist” after Guterres argued that the Oct. 7 attacks “did not happen in a vacuum.”

Several former officials and outside groups have already begun discussions with the US and Israel, and floated possible plans. One came from the Washington Institute for Near East Policy, which called for a Palestinian-run interim administration, with the UN Relief and Works Agency continuing to provide food, heath and education.”

[porcelainvino]

thank you @sopheadraws for tagging me :D

i’m using my main playlist that i’ve been adding songs on since like 2019 ; disclaimer i don’t have any glee songs on that playlist because i try to separate my glee songs with my “normal music”…. the term “normal” is very reaching but you get my point

1. the cast of mamma mia! (2008) covering “young n****z” by 2pac

no… i don’t think they would sing a song about young black life and trauma uM TERRIBLE START

2. kalush covering “crucified” by army of lovers

nah kalush mainly does songs in ukrainian and their style and vibe wouldn’t fit this song

3. billy joel covering “crocodile rock” by elton john

might slay actually.. tbh i have not listened to them in a while, i mostly listened to them in my old white man music era in 2019 lol, but i think he’d probably eat with crocodile rock

4. marilyn monroe covering “super graphic ultra modern girl” by chappell roan

OH SHE’D EAT THIS UP IDEC THAT IT’S OBVIOUSLY NOT HER STYLE BUT LIKE YES PLZ

5. megan thee stallion covering “фен-шуй” by gluk’oza

hmmm maybe not. at least not this song specifically, one of gluk’oza’s older songs would be a cooler cover in my opinion,, this is also excusing the fact that this song is entirely in russian oops

6. trixie mattel covering “carnival” by the cardigans

yeah i think this cover would actually be pretty good! i can picture it in my head like when trixie did those singing livestreams during covid this is that vibe

7. jinkx monsoon covering “one way or another” by blondie

yess she’d eat this shit up no other comments

8. sopor aeternus & the ensemble of shadows covering “cupid’s chokehold / breakfast in america” by gym class heroes

unironically would eat this up like could you imagine a goth version of this song LMAOO also sopor HAS done goth covers of songs so i’d trust her with this

9. käärijä covering “mamma mia” by abba

this is how finland can still win eurovision 2023 JK JK i think this would be an okay cover

10. babymetal covering “ghuleh / zombie queen” by ghost

OBVIOUSLY they’d eat this shit up like if you squint a little, babymetal and this song kinda match

i still suck at tagging BUT THIS WAS REALLY FUN SO IF YOU’D LIKE TO PLEASE DO THIS I THINK IT’S SILLY!!!

[the-iron-shoulder]

back on my bullshit: bandura edition

[image description: three photos of a poorly made Ukrainian bandura, which is a stringed instrument in the zither family. It is shaped kind of like the lowercase letter “b” and has strings stretched across its entire length. On this one, the bridges are made out of a bunch of little pieces of varying sizes, which is not standard. It has a very messy appearance. End description.]

so back in 2022 I found out that the bandura exists (I don’t have any Ukrainian heritage or connection afaik, but I read an article about it in a mega old newsletter and it was a whole story that I’ll tell some other time) and I became obsessed with the idea of making one. It was the second woodworking project I’d ever tried and, while I think I did pretty well considering my lack of tools and lack of experience, it never actually turned into something I was happy with. I mean, compare what a professionally made one looks like:

[image description: a professionally made Bandura, which looks very different from the amateur one above. End description.] image credit: Julianhayda, Wikimedia commons, CC-By-SA

big difference. Also, beyond the aesthetics, it just wasn’t playable… the lower strings were sometimes okay, but the higher strings never resonated and just sounded dead, when they weren’t just slipping off the bridges in the first place. Also, the string placement wasn’t very good and it was hard to physically reach a lot of the higher strings. That’s why you’ve never heard me post a recording of me playing this thing… it doesn’t really work!

I’ve got some better tools now, specifically a router, so I’m hoping that I can redo the bridges on this bad boy and actually turn it into something functional!

so normally, many banduras are diatonic (like the white keys on a piano with no black keys), but I don’t like that because I want to be able to play any arbitrary video game music song I want on it, not just songs that don’t have chromatic notes in them. So what I tried to do (which didn’t work, to be clear) was to have each individual little bridge be a high bridge or a low bridge so that the strings would be at an angle, with the idea being that the natural notes (“white keys”) would be raised near the top of the instrument and the accidentals (sharps and flats, “black keys”) would be raised near the bottom of the instrument, thereby theoretically making it easier to tell by touch where each note is.

I think that this can still work! But instead of making the bridges out of a million little triangles, I’m going to try to make them solid pieces (two of the bridges on the existing instrument are kind of like that), but differently from how I did it last time. First, I’m going to simply make them taller, so there can be a bigger differentiation between a string’s “up” position and its “down” position. That might help them feel a little less crowded, maybe? Also instead of trying to use a drill press to punch holes in the bridge for the “down” portion, I’m going to try to use a router to carve a groove through it, leaving some posts for support. I’m also thinking that the router will let me make a more consistent point at the top of each of these, so there will hopefully be a good spot for the strings to sit and so they might not slip as much? I’ll still probably need to file little notches in for them to sit in, but one thing at a time, I guess.

I still don’t actually know what I’m doing! This may end up as a monument to my failure! We’ll find out!!

[k-s-morgan]

Another monthly update! So, this month was extra stressful since the shelling of Kyiv resumed. Unfortunately, most explosions happened not far from me, and each of them terrified me as usual. From better news, none of them damaged my home or the homes of my loved ones, and Germany seems to have given a modern air defense system to my city in particular. All missiles were destroyed lately, including today, and I hope that our luck sticks.

Of course, everything is scary even when the air defense system is at work. You’re reading the news, seeing information about 20, 50, or 100 missiles entering Ukrainian territory, and then you just wait quietly, wondering if one of these missiles is going to reach your city, your district, your house. I often feel sick with worry during these moments. I can’t distract myself with anything, I’m glued to my phone and trying to fight the uncontrollable tremors. When explosions start, it’s chilling, and even though I now recognize the sounds of air defense system, I’m never sure if I’m right. Like today: I heard 4+ explosions, I saw the smoke coming up, and I couldn’t tell if the missile hit or was destroyed because what I hear and think is not reliable in these situations.

The worst thing is when electricity and Internet disappear. I have no way to find out if the air raid continues, if it stopped or if it started anew. I can’t connect with other people, so I’m just cuddling my cats in the dark apartment under the blanket and keep praying for the best.

I reconnected with one of my friends recently. She lived on territories occupied by Ruzzia for a while, and I barely recognized her when I saw her. She looks decades older than she actually is. She witnessed some of her friends tortured and killed for nothing but amusement. Her son was shot at from the tank by Ruzzians when he tried to get some water, and the fact that he survived is a miracle. Speaking with her horrified me and broke my heart. I just can’t wrap my mind around any of this.

Your words and support mean everything to me. They help me stay strong and encourage me to keep writing. I’m starting my new Tomarry story in November, and since war will be a big part of it, I look forward to expressing some of my feelings and experiences there. I always read and re-read all of your words when I’m feeling down or scared, and I can’t tell how much motivation this gives me.

Also, huge, huge thanks to those who keep supporting me via Patreon. My financial situation has been consistently difficult for the last several months: everything is getting more expensive, my parents’ salaries got reduced, and while I still have mine, health issues gained volume. My cats, my pigeons, my family, myself — we all got sick and some of us are still recovering. Both of my cats had their surgeries this month, and this alone cost me 90% of my salary. Without your contributions, I don’t even know what I’d do. They helped me cover everything and make it through this month.

Here’s my lovely cat Tom after his surgery: he was sleeping for 3 hours right on top of me after I brought him back home.

And this is Simura. Unfortunately, this baby might require another procedure in November. She has a runny nose and she’s sneezing blood occasionally. No treatment worked so far, so we might have to sign up for rhinoscopy.

I’m excited to share the update of my Black Butler story and hopefully the first chapter of another Tomarry. Thank you for your asks, comments, notes and messages. This is a life-changing time, and all of you will forever remain a part of this journey in my memory. I’m so grateful to all of you.

My electricity has just disappeared again, but I charged my laptop enough to last me for several hours, so I’m going back to writing. Have a good, peaceful night/day!

[kazhanko-art]

So for anyone else who is trying to learn Ukrainian and has issues finding games with Ukrainian translations to practice with (as well as can’t get the torrent services to work) here are some games on steam listed with Ukrainian options (if you know more feel free to reblog)

Tunic: zelda-like with a fair bit of reading and will probably force you to pick up some of the words

Return of the Obra Dinn: puzzles game with a lot of dialogue. I haven’t tried the Ukrainian language setting yet but it’s a very fun mystery game, so I think it might be a good pic

Field Hospital: Dr Taylor’s Story: pretty sure this was made by a Ukrainian company and Ukrainian is the language it was written in. I haven’t played it yet, but it’s listed as positive for reviews is a cheap game. It’s described as a detective game where your choices matter

Tukoni: cute point and click that was made in collaboration with a Ukrainian children’s author, though it’s not super text heavy

Phasmophobia: interface only. Last I played (when my laptop could launch it) it was admittedly clunky as shit, but it’s a fun horror game with friends and from what I’ve heard has been improved upon (not that I’d know, it crashed in me)

Minecraft: you know what minecraft is

(I unfortunately can’t really confirm how good the translations are, but finding games with any Ukrainian options is difficult so you gotta take what you can get)

This is of course more reflective of games that I have personal interest in, so if you have others you’d like to list somewhere please do.

[hologramcowboy]

https://at.tumblr.com/hologramcowboy/httpstwittercomditchlilytigerstatus162733189/wnyptttbl66d

I saw this photographer complaining about your use of the picture, too. Reading the comments was just …

Instead of calling someone a creepy conspiracy theorist because they interpret a photo (and real life comments and actions) differently than themselves, maybe they should try looking at things from another angel. This obsession with seeing Jensen as perfect and constantly having the time of his life is ridiculous and points to a huge bias. I’ll be honest, the particular picture in question, where Jensen looks in pain, could be him "living the music" but to me, he does not look like he’s just grooving. Also, there is video of the concert, so it’s not like people’s opinions are only based on photos.

The last time Jensen performed at a con, he was yelling, not singing, and yet they praise his amazing performance. Jensen has a lovely voice when he isn’t straining it, and is a good performer (usually), but that doesn’t actually mean he is an amazing, Uber talented singer. He was very good as Dean, but to say he never had over the top moments or ones that didn’t quite connect, is just not true. Saying he’s liberal and a huge ally is a huge stretch seeing as he is very closed mouthed on politics in general (I don’t actually blame him there, as if I were famous I’d want to appeal to the widest audience and would stick to discussing my art). Saying he likes Destiel now because he learned the hard way that criticizing the stupid ship gets him outright hate and death threats, is embracing willful ignorance. Jensen and Danneel can only be viewed as couples goals, despite the fact that their body language screens anything but affection. Jared is the bad guy because he cracked the illusion that Jensen is a perfect friend, professional and gentleman, and had a "tantrum" on Twitter because he didn’t let Jebsen off the hook or bail him out, for once, for his shitty actions around the prequel. Jensen supports Ukrainian and really cares about the issue, despite the fact that he starred in a commercial promoting Atomic Heart. Anyway, my point is the man is not perfect, no one is, but as soon as they see any criticism, they call the person delivering it crazy, a hater, or a miserable person who is just projecting.

I love my family, but that doesn’t mean I think it or each family member (myself included) is without flaws.

I started watching Supernatural as a Dean and Jensen fan. I was crazy about Dean until later seasons when he just got angrier and more hypocritical. At first, I admired Ackles for his love for Jared and humility, but his behavior (his inconsistency at cons, and how he talked about Jared lovingly one minute, then criticizing him at JIB or joking at his expense when he’s not there, while calling him brother in the next breath) would not allow me to keep blindly sighing over him. Not to mention, I noticed how his stories were always humble (or not so humble) brags. He isn’t consistent and changes for the crowd he’s in.

I’m sorry, but if you are the one who only sees someone as perfect and can’t acknowledge any flaws to the point that you need to attack anyone who dares mention one, then you are the one without a balanced view. Our observation are subjective, obviously, and you don’t have to agree with how someone elde interprets something, but to instantly write them off as just a hater or lying (unless it’s a provable lie, or delusion with no proof like hellers and cockles shippers) maybe take a look at your own objectivity and need to go to battle for someone you don’t actually know.

It saddens me that Jensen has such judgemental, toxic fans that only care about fetishiz*ing him. Then I remember there are also fans like you, who are able to see him as a real and complex person. Thank you for this beautiful post! 💕💕💕

I think the reason why they immediately resort to bullying and gaslighting is because they know they stand no chance of making eloquent, balanced arguments because they lack objectivity. I mean all they do is project, not only on others but on Jensen especially, he needs to be the fantasy they created and is not allowed to stray from that perfect image. I cannot imagine how painful that must be to him. No human is perfect and we all just want to be loved for who we are, not for some false image others build in their attempt to exploit our beauty, like in his case.

[suomeen]

Chapter 6: Cold Waves and Warm Welcomes

On January 2, Russia launched 99 missiles on Kyiv and Kharkiv, leaving dozens wounded and dead. A part of me felt guilty for not being there, even though it would have done absolutely no good. But it also reminded me I made the right call.

Meanwhile, the temperature outside dropped to up to -35 degrees. Apparently, this was unusual even for Finland and a record for the century. I’m glad I had a very thick and warm down jacket with me because I can’t image what I’d do without it. At one point, I had a doctor’s appointment and I miscalculated the distance to the clinic. It turned out to be a 8-minute walk and not 3 so I was genuinely concerned I might get a frostbite because I wasn’t feeling my hands or face. I had to seek refuge in the nearest door, which turned out to be a musical instrument shop with a cool staff.

Our apartment with white beds and plastic cups felt more like a hospital ward. We took very little with us, so we needed all kinds of things, big and small. You don’t really realize how many things you need in your daily life until you have to start anew. Mops and can openers, brushes and scissors, kettles and curtains, - there are so many things you don’t think about but the absence of which makes life very uncomfortable. So we took to the flea markets and consignment shops. We were building our life from the ground up. But we had to still consider the fact that we could be moved any time so we shouldn’t get anything big or costly. Make it cozier but don’t get too attached. From now on, you don’t have a home.

About a week into the year, another young woman moved in. Tetiana is from the Western Ukraine, though she spent the past 10 years working in Poland. At first, I wasn’t sure if we would get along. She seemed a little chaotic, very alert and a kind of territorial. But soon I realized it was just the result of her life experience. She’s working class and spent years working odd jobs, in factories and cleaning, often having to share rooms with very questionable people. She got fucked over a lot so her apprehension became very understandable. Once she felt she was in company of decent friendly people, she relaxed and showed a very different side. She’s not educated, but very curious and hard-working and also quite childlike when you get to know her. She proved to be an excellent cohabitant.

Tetiana also knows how to grip life by the balls so she gets around quickly. There was a middle-aged Ukrainian man living on the first floor. We soon learned his name was Uncle Sasha and many people would come and ask about him. We didn’t know him but it wasn’t hard to connect the dots. Uncle Sasha knows things and how to get things. Soon though he was moving out because his children moved and the apartment was considered too big for him and his wife. He had to clear out the apartment, including furniture. This is how we got an old but comfy sofa and a bunch of teen boy clothes. Our standard of living took off.

It took some time to get used to our new arrangement but after a while, the 4 of us formed a loose but stable bond, keeping a healthy distance. We were always very polite and supportive to each other. We often shared meals and occasionally drinks. We gave each other space when he felt someone needed it. It really worked.

Sharing an apartment and a life with strangers… It’s not something I would ever choose but it was nice to live through. It’s amazing how in such a short time you can develop a rather close companionship. It felt like a blessing.

One day I had a talk with one of the social workers from the reception center who came over to install new locks. Not many of them speak English well so I took the opportunity. She was incredibly nice and kind. We had a warm earnest talk and she told me they were there to do everything they could to make us feel at home and give us everything we need. I told her I would love to give back in some way and that I’m doing my best to learn. She said I could take my time, there was no rush. I nearly cried. I asked her for a hug before she left. And I am not a hugger. At all.

Once we finally got our IDs and prepaid cards, my mind was finally somewhat at ease. There was some sort of stability.

But of course, this was just another illusion and it made the upcoming reality check even harder.