#Mod Bun

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

some people will not believe you. it doesn't mean you aren't believable.

[mdzsao3]

ATTENTION EVERYONE! A fellow bunny has misplaced a fic she read and forgot to bookmark! If you know of this fic, please link it in the comments so she can read it again!

[lunarbun-ships]

Self Ship Commission Info

(please specify which mod you want to commission when you dm!)

Mod Bun

>>>COMMISSION QUEUE<<<

Mod Kitty

(payment will be through paypal!)

x pr0sh!p / c0msh!p dni x

[real-princess-alice]

sorry to ask, but can you babysit Ena for a few hours? last babysitter almost set the house on fire while making Turron with her.

//I have been gone for 4 months…come back….and find out I have to babysit Ena…

[woodlandstims]

Lírio, Sinais do Outro Lado

🧱 🐺 🧱

🐺 🧱 🐺

🧱 🐺 🧱

[ask-thomassaggs]

mod maes of @ask-tiberius-cadell @maes-the-deer and @markus-bell and owner of the official blog list here, I MISSED THIS BLOG? and one other blog (@belledama-5601) i am so sorry????????????????? holy shit

(OOC: You're good lol X3c I've been just vibing :3c You can add this silly blog to the list if you'd like! :D)

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

I’m not going to dive into anything deep here, just ranting.

When you tell someone about your trauma, whatever it may be. From an uncomfortable encounter with someone you thought you were close to, or something that absolutely changed you without a doubt, good people will tell you ‘your trauma is valid no matter how deep.’ You can listen to someone who had been hurt deeply by a family member or adult or child and know that it was traumatizing. You can hear someone tell you about how distressed they were when someone touched them, even simply on the leg, in an uncomfortable way and tell them that their trauma from that time is valid. But when it comes to trying to figure out if your own trauma is good enough, why is it so hard? You can validate others all day long and listen to their stories, but when you hear yours it just doesn’t add up. Why did something so simple stick with me? If it wasn’t bad, why am I afraid that there is something wrong with every child who shows even the slightest sign of being abused? Even if nothing is happening, why do I overthink and find ways to connect what happened to what I’m seeing? It’s really embarrassing to think of even going to a therapist because there are people who literally cannot function normally because of their trauma, and here I am with what feels like horrible overthinking, paranoia, and anxiety. But when I step back and listen to others it feels like I’m just a normal person who is acting sick just to know how it feels.

Hi anon,

Survivors who struggle to give themselves the same empathy they give other survivors have unique experiences and beliefs to explain it. It's possible that you've had experiences where you endured victim blaming and/or gaslighting and ended up internalizing some of that rhetoric towards yourself, like that your experiences aren't significant enough to seek therapy for or that you're exaggerating.

There are several factors that impact our resiliency - our ability to bounce back and cope with adverse events, including the environment we were raised in, our support network, genetics, hereditary mental health conditions, and preexisting trauma. If you lived in a safe and supportive environment with no preexisting trauma or mental health issues in your family, you're more likely to effectively cope with a potentially traumatic event than someone in an unsafe environment with no support, mental health issues in the family, and prior trauma. Everyone is dealt a different set of cards that make them more or less prone to becoming traumatized. That's why trauma is not defined by the event itself, because the same event can elicit varying psychological responses, no matter how severe the event is perceived. So, comparing your trauma to others who have had it worse does not benefit you nor the person you're comparing yourself to - all it does is make you feel needlessly wrong. Sure it could be worse, but it could be better too.

It's also possible that the magnitude of your trauma is too intimidating to confront and it's easier to minimize and rationalize it. For some people, depersonalization and emotional amnesia can explain why they struggle to empathize with their own trauma as opposed to others.

It sounds like deep down you know that what happened had a significant impact on you, and it's worth listening to that more. I hope that you can eventually give yourself the compassion and validation you deserve. Please let us know if you need anything else or want to add on.

-Bun

[lunarbun-ships]

with kittys permission i'm exposing them on who their new f/o is and posting an edit i did for them <33

[lunarbun-ships]

forgot i could draw ship art to make myself feel better and it worked not clickbait

[lunarbun-ships]

happy valentines day moots<33

[lunarbun-ships]

my brain was finally nice enough to me to give me the energy to draw ship art ❤️ most of these are based off of doodles kitty did for me so ty kitty<3

[lunarbun-ships]

im very autistic over this man im sorry

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

seeing how the media and society essentially witch hunted amber heard only further solidifies my own fear in coming forward as a victim and not being believed. I honestly don't think I ever will

Hi anon,

I absolutely resonate with this, and it is a fear I have as well. Regardless of whether or not she's innocent, the level of scrutiny and misogyny following her trial in the US just goes to show our unfortunate attitudes about female survivors of domestic violence, or at least those who present themselves as such.

Like what her attorney Ben Rottenborn said, "Think about the message they are sending to Amber, and victims of domestic abuse everywhere. If you didn't take pictures, it didn't happen. If you did take pictures, they're fake. If you didn't tell your friends, you're lying. If you did tell your friends, they're part of the hoax. If you didn't seek medical treatment, you weren't injured. If you did seek medical treatment, you're crazy." If you cry, you're acting. If you didn't cry, you're obviously lying. There is no right way to be a survivor and the public reaction from this trial proves that.

The hard reality is that no matter how convincing you are or how much evidence you have, there will always be someone who doesn't believe you. In a way it is freeing to come to terms with this because even real survivors are disbelieved but it doesn't mean they're lying. You don't need other people, especially a stranger who doesn't know you or your story, to confirm that what you experienced was real. Your lived experience, your memory, is enough, regardless of what you are told.

I hope that you can continue to rebuild your confidence and empowerment in your truth as society continues to grapple with their attitude towards survivors. If anyone would like to add a comment or suggestion, please do so respectfully. Otherwise, I hope I could help and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

hi, im indigo and im looking for advice and validation. tw transphobia, sexual assault, incest, infantillization (kind of? it feels that way)

I'm nonbinary transmasc, and i want to start transitioning but i have fears.

On one hand i'm scared of coming out to my family, because i keep fearing they will say it's because of my uncle who molested me that i feel uncomfortable with my body. I don't want them to think that, especially since i've known before i was assaulted, but i don't know how i can convince them. I dont want to start behind their backs but i dont know how they'd react

On the other hand, i am kinda scared that it DID influence me. Before i was ok not getting on hormones because i didn't want a few effects, but now im considering it a lot more because im sick of being mistaken for a minor, even more when i'm passing as a man. I was 18 when i was assaulted, but if you don't know me it's easy to give me 5 years younger because of my height, face and voice. And it's really getting on my nerves, but id feel bad if that's the reason id take hormones, i dont want what happened to dictate my identity and risking people taking advantage of it to belittle me.

Im just kind of lost, and it's not something that i can easy talk about with others, so im hoping to get some advice here

Hi indigo,

I'm sorry to hear about what you went through. Please know that it's okay if your trauma has at least some influence on how you perceive yourself and your gender identity. Especially if you experienced gendered violence, that could become so intertwined with your identity that it feels safer to be something else.

When I experienced CSA, I soon after came out as FTM. I felt that femininity had caused me trauma and pain, and for me I associated it with being docile and voiceless. When I identified as male, I felt like I was reclaiming my power and starting fresh. As time went by, I slowly regained a healthier relationship with my femininity and now consider myself femme nonbinary. But it's absolutely possible to process and heal from your trauma without invalidating or reverting your gender identity. I'm sharing my story with you because I think it might resonate with you and also help you to consider that you're not alone in feeling this way. Your identity is not the "problem", it's the trauma.

Regardless of how much influence your trauma has over your identity, it is valid. If you can access or afford it, a mental health professional such as a therapist (ideally one who specializes in working with queer folks) could help you process your trauma and navigate how your gender identity may or may not be related, as well as help you explore any fears in coming out to your family. If anyone has any additional comments or suggestions, please feel free to respectfully add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[lunarbun-ships]

redesigned their fankid <33

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Nothing deep here, just a question.

Is it possible to be ‘mentally ill’ despite having a relatively easy life? For example, I live a privileged life with a house, an abundance of food, clothes, supplies to fuel my hobbies and electronics and I’m good in school. My parents are good people who just happen to have grown up in difficult situations, but they’re financially stable and treat us well.

Yet, for some reason I always end up in bad situations (nothing super big like sa or anything). For a long time I kind of just ignored everything that happened, but recently it’s been resurfacing in a weird way. I feel like my problems aren’t valid because most peoples trauma is, for lack of better words, BIGGER, and I just have these little incidents that make me sad once a month to the point I can’t even look at myself in the mirror without wanting to rip the skin off of my body.

But I’m a pretty ‘normal person’ in terms of my problems, I just don’t know why I feel so disconnected and DIFFERENT even though my life isn’t bad.

Hi anon,

Yes, it's absolutely possible to have trauma and mental illness, regardless of your privileges.

Like I said before, there are several factors that impact our resiliency - our ability to bounce back and cope with adverse events, including the environment we were raised in, our support network, genetics, hereditary mental health conditions, and preexisting trauma. If you lived in a safe and supportive environment with no preexisting trauma or mental health issues in your family, you're more likely to effectively cope with a potentially traumatic event than someone in an unsafe environment with no support, mental health issues in the family, and prior trauma. But even if you are dealt the best possible cards, it doesn't mean you can't still become traumatized or develop a mental illness. Comparing your trauma to others who have had it worse does not benefit you nor the person you're comparing yourself to - all it does is make you feel needlessly wrong. Sure, it could be worse, but it could be better too.

Also, for a lot of people, mental illnesses like depression are due to chemical imbalances, which are not necessarily affected by access to basic necessities like shelter and food. I have heard similar stories of people with depression being minimized and gaslit because of "how good they have it". But depression doesn't necessarily care how much food or clothes you have. It's something much deeper and foundational than that.

I hope I could shed some insight into your situation. If anyone else has any comments or suggestions, feel free to add on. Otherwise, I hope I could help, and please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun