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ch2rub · 11 months ago

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~ Who are you? ~ A Mischa x Reader fic

Ch-4/2

Posted onto all platform- July 26, 2024

TW- Panic attack and self harm mentioned

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"O-oh uhm, hey Ocean." You say with a shaky voice. You look at her with wide eyes as you start to panic. Not having a single explanation for why you were so scared and nervous, or what the broken porcelain doll had to do with anything. Not wanting to seem like a looney you tried the first excuse that came to your mind.

"Was just, looking around. You know" Not only are you the worst liar in all of history, but that did not cover for the doll on the floor. Or why you were acting so spooked, even after the initial scare Ocean gave you just appearing behind you like that. Not hearing and steps of any sign of a person behind you. As you tried to lie to Ocean your voice continued to shake slightly. Your eyes drifted around the room, not wanting to look at Ocean in the eyes. You brought up your hand to fidget with the red tie around your neck. A wavering smile adorned your face as you tried to act as normal as possible.

"Yeah ... sure." Ocean responds, unimpressed. A sense of recognition goes over her face as she takes her first look at the doll. Suddenly getting quite nervous herself, she continued to ask you a question. "Is that your doll?" She pointed to the doll broken on the floor. The head was cleanly snapped off of its neck, after falling from the painting that seemed to have never been there in the first place.

"Uhh, nah. I was just-umm in here." You respond definitely not awkwardly or suspiciously. Not at all.

"You can take it if you want. I don't care." You say as you step towards the side. Trying to get as far as you could from the creepy doll. With each glance you gave it the more anxious and scared you seemed to get. You got as far away from the scene as possible. Walking toward the opposite side of the room and sitting down on a large box. Leaving Ocean to bend down and pick up the two pieces of the recently beheaded doll. "I'm just gonna take a seat real quick, s-sorry." As you sat you felt your sight slightly blur and your balance feel more uneven. Your legs almost giving out.

"Yeah, it's fine. Im um gonna fix this up and give it to a friend, I think it would make her really happy to see it." She grabbed the pieces and placed them onto the box where the painted canvas used to be before it disappeared. As Ocean slowly made her way towards you, you started to panic more. You stared down at your lap, clenching and unclenching you had while they shook more violently than they were before. Your vision continued to go in and out of focus. The air started to feel thicker. Making it harder and harder for you to breathe with each gasp. Everything felt muggy and uncomfortable. The air feeling hot and your uniform feeling scratchy. You started to feel sweat pool onto your forehead and you continuously scratched at your legs with your shaky hand. Continuing to get rougher and rougher with each scratch. You shifted in your seat continuously as your breathing got heavier. Your lungs heaved for air as it seemed unable to enter.

"Woah- hey hey hey. You're alright, you're gonna be fine." Ocean quickly rushed to your side after noticing the state you were in. The awkward space between the two of you disappeared once you started to panic. Ocean wasn't good with these things. She never was. Although her unwillingness to say it out loud, she knew she was a selfish person. Only ever really cared for herself, but she has been getting better at caring for others and being kinder. At Least she thinks she is.

She places her icy cold hands on your wrist, trying to restrain you from breaking skin. She gently rubbed her thumbs on your warmer hands. Trying to soothe you in any way she can think of. Her first thoughts were to stop you from hurting yourself and causing any harm to your body. The left side of her brain kicked in immediately as she quickly restrained yourself from harming yourself. The other way you could harm yourself was your incapability to breathe in enough air. Your blurring sight proved that if you weren't able to breathe normally soon, you would soon pass out.

"Match my breathing with me, ok." She said, not starting until she saw you lightly shake your head. Confirming that you were listening. "Deep breath in." She took a deep breath in and held it for a couple of seconds, prompting you to do the same. It was a struggle for you to gain control of your breathing again. Once you were able to focus on her words and instructions your eyesight was clearing up. So was the shakiness in your hands and the urge to continue and scratch and scratch until your skin was gone. The clammy feeling slowly dispersed and so did the uncomfortable feeling you were getting from touching everything around.

"Are you ok?" Ocean asked. Her brows and mouth slightly downturned. You haven't known each other for long, but you can tell she clearly cares about you. Making sure that you were no longer in your mini-panicking state.

"Y-yeah yeah. Im ... im good. Thank you." The thank you was the scariest thing that came out of your mouth that day. Looking up into her eyes with your own teary ones sealing the deal. That being the first time you actually made eye contact that day, it shows how much you cared and appreciated what she had done for you if she wasn't there who knows what would happened. How you might have hurt yourself the more you broke down. Good thing that never happened and definitely won't ever happen. (wink wink nudge nudge)

It was obvious Ocean wanted to know what happened before she entered the room that caused you to go into a panic attack, but sensing that it would be insensitive to ask straight away she decided against it. For the remaining minutes, the two of you sat side by side on the large box. Not a word was spoken to each other. The quiet was calming, it felt peaceful. The only sound was your heavy breaths as you continued to calm yourself down from the incident. Ocean didn't say anything. Not really knowing if she should say anything. She decided that making sure that you were fine for the remainder of the lunch period would be better than trying to make awkward small talk, or just leaving altogether.

Once the bell rang you pushed yourself up from the box and walked towards the door. Catching a peak of the porcelain doll on the box in front of the door and shivering. As you walked out you felt Ocean eyes continue to track your every move. Her not making any moves to leave when the bell rang, unlike yourself. You didn't think much of it, your head being somewhere else. As you walk down the dim hallway to your next class you jump up from another thump hitting the small window.

"Jesus fucking christ. What the hell."

You quietly mutter some curses under your breath as you peered into the window to be met with the sight of three dead crows. The third being the newest. You turn back to and quickly power walk away from the trio of dead birds. Having no idea why they keep committing suicide by slamming themselves into the window you decided to look it up later.

You arrived at your next class, doing your usual sweep of the students attending your class. You first started doing this because you wanted to get used to the faces that were gonna be surrounding you. Then it turned into you trying to search for Penny or any sign of her. You want to think that you continue to do this habit today to look for your missing friend, but the longer the day went on. The more you realized why you were searching the room. It was pathetic really. Or at least you thought it was. You continued to search each class in hopes of seeing the inky soft hair you saw last night. As you sat down your mind continued to linger on the thought of your dream boy. Not wanting to think about what had happened in the choir room any longer. Locking it away in the back of your mind.

To distract yourself from the things you did not want to face, and the boredom of your current classes. You continued to think of the boy your heart seemed to long for. A part of you felt that it was pitiful. To have fallen for a boy you have never met and most likely, does not exist. The other part of you though, wants him. No not want. Needs him. To hear him speak. To feel his fingertips run against your arms. Even the thought of it causing you to shiver slightly. The part of you would not be satisfied until you had an interaction with the dream boy. You scoffed internally. 'Like that would ever happen.'

As far as you know he does not exist. Just a figment of your imagination. Something your brain could've created to give yourself comfort in these stressful times. You believed the part of your brain that hated the idea of obsessing over this fictional man. (looking at you guys) You wanted to get rid of the thought of him. You decided to give yourself the day to let your heart fall into the fake scenarios that your brain created of the man. Just giving yourself the day to feel the ecstasy of having a crush.

You always hated the idea of crushes. For most crushes only lasted a week, maybe two at most. That's how it was for all of the other girls in school back in the city. For you it was different. You've only ever had two real crushes in the past. Both of them lasting around two to three years. Insane I know, but you never seemed to let go. Your heart clinging on although you knew they would never like you back. They never did. As a matter of a fact you almost going to graduate high school and you never had your first kiss. It's shameful really. That's why you hated the thought of liking someone romantically. After past experiences, you learned that it always ended with you feeling worse about yourself than before. At Least this time you won't have to face rejection.

While getting home you made yourself a game plan. Something to stick to that will make this stupid little crush to go away. In your brain, this will help you stay on track and not let yourself give in to the way a crush feels. At first, it feels wonderful to admire someone, but the longer you have it the worse it gets. You would know what it's like, and having a crush on a boy you say momentarily in a dream in a no-no. Him only existing in your mind will cause the crush to slowly eat at you. The only way your past crushes went away was because you lost contact with them. Giving your brain nothing to cling to. That won't work for a boy entirely made in your mind.

Your plan is to give yourself a day to be a lovesick fool. You don't want to admit it but at first, it feels good to have a crush. Not having one in a while you just want to feel it again. Giving yourself a day lets you not get too hung up on the feelings. If you let yourself act like this for any longer you would lose control over your feelings. That won't be good.

Tomorrow you'll focus on finding a new boy. Look around your classes and find the one that you think is the most attractive or someone that you find charming. Try to talk with them and develop a friendship. This would be killing two birds with one stone. You were in desperate need of a friend who wasn't missing or someone you only seemed to see at lunch. This will give you a new friend and someone to distract yourself with. If everything goes to plan you'll be able to get feelings for this new guy and not think about the dream boy any longer. Maybe if you're lucky you'll get yourself a boyfriend. Who knows.

In your mind, this was the best thing you can think of. Fighting fire with fire.

Little did you know this would backfire in a way you would never expect.

.........

Arriving home you opened the door and quickly headed downstairs into your room. Not going to give your mom your usual greeting and recap talk. Being so focused you didn't realize that your mother wasn't there at all.

You jogged down the steps and headed straight to your bed. Taking off your sneakers along the way and shedding your backpack before you hopped onto your mattress. You grabbed your homework from your bag to start it and finish it as fast as you can. Wanting to get it out of the way so you can do other things.

On your way home and after making your game plan you had some time to think. One thing you remembered you wanted to search up was what was up with those freaky ass crows. Three of them have slammed themselves into the hallway window. One yesterday and two today. Not only that but the stuff with the painting. You didn't want to confront it and had no plan of doing so, but after some thought you decided not to. Leaving the experience as locked away as you can and bottling up the experience. You didn't want to confront the feelings that you felt but you did have questions you wanted answered. You marked it all up to this shitty town you just had to move to. You have no idea why you even moved. You have wanted to ask your mom about it but never did. As you thought that it was the town's fault for everything that has happened you wanted to do some research. Wanting to look at everything you can about the town online.

Finishing your homework in record time, you jumped up to one of the boxes in the corner of the room. Starting to gain dust. You rub your finger across the top of it and cringing. Reminding you that you still had to fully unpack. You opened it at grabbed the laptop from under all of the random things you had stuffed in there. Grabbing it and setting it on your bed you open it up to find out that it had more power. Internally groaning you went back to the box to fish out the charger and plug the laptop in. Sitting down on the bed and sighing. With all of the initial adrenaline going away you think of what to do to pass the time. Your eyes wander over to the closet, remembering that there were things still left to discover.

You walked over to the mini walk-in closet and look around. Running your fingertips along your clothes and some of the ones you decided to keep, remembering you had to do your laundry. Pushing that thought to the back of your brain you bent down to grab the small box stuffed in the back of the closet. You grabbed it and opened the lid. Remembering the last time you opened it was your second night here, to watch the saw movie. You left the movie discarded on the table that was holding the TV up. Never feeling bothered to put it back. Thinking back onto that night reminded you of the soothing scent you smelt and the feeling of someone next to you. 'Just another weird ass thing that happened in this town' You say brushing it off. Only adding to your want to search about uranium.

Grabbing the box and plopping down onto the bed, the first thing that caught your interest was an iPod. Grabbing you went through the songs added onto it. Mostly rap songs with the occasional rock or indie rock song. Expected from the posters adorning the walls. Continuing to shift through the box you take notice of five pieces of paper. Four of them being white leaf paper folded to fit into envelopes. The remaining one is a postcard. Grabbing the square piece of paper you see the printing on the front to be a view of a large building with a mint green dome for a roof. The background is full of large silver skyscrapers.

On the bottom of the photo saying "HELLO FROM KYIV" Using your lacking geographical skill you remember that Kyiv was the capital of either Ukraine or Russia. You weren't sure which. Flipping it over you look at the words and try to read them, only to realize they were in another language. Makes sense if it was coming from Ukraine or Russia.

до Міша Бачінскі

Ми сподіваємося, що у вашій новій сім'ї все добре. Ми надсилаємо цього листа з деякими сумними новинами. На жаль, сьогодні вранці твоя мати померла. Лікарі кажуть, що через отруєння ураном. Якщо у вас і вашої нової сім'ї немає грошей на похорон, ми змушені поховати її в могилі, яка оплачується податками, без похорону.

Наші глибокі вибачення. ЮНІСЕФ.

Not understanding a lick of the language you continued to study the paper and noticed slightly faded tear stains. It would be hard to notice with one glance but it was definitely there. 'Poor guy' Not being able to read it caused you to lose interest fast and toss it back into the boxes. Grabbing the folded sheets of paper, you open them up to be met with writing in the same language. The writing was more messy and sprawled out than the neater and more formal postcard. You notice the same tear stains on two of the pieces of paper. The other two not having any trace of tears. Frowning you folded the pieces of paper back up a throwing them into the box. Feeling empathy for the kid but also disappointed that you didn't learn anything new about the mystery teen who lived here before you.

Tossing the box onto the floor you grabbed your laptop to see if it would turn on and it did. You immediately typed in your passcode and went to Google. Your first search being "What does it mean when crows hit windows." That being the first thing on your mind. Scrolling down the results you see the usual ones about birds' visions and them not being able to see glass but one result caught your eye. You see one result about the symbology and the meaning of a crow hitting a window. Clicking on the link you start reading the contents. Apparently, when a crow hits a window it means something bad is going to happen. This caused your eyes to widen. You were left with two options. Either this was the universe telling you that this town is bad news and to leave, or it's just the birds having shit eyes. Thinking about it the bid did first hit the window when I met Constance and Ocean. Then again when I had the moment with the painting.

You wouldn't think of the two girls as a bad thing. Yeah, they were a little weird with their first impressions but today ocean proved to you that she cared and was a good friend. The crow hitting the window today being the main red flag. Either it was warning you about the anxiety attack you were gonna get or it was just a stupid coincidence. You left it as a coincidence as you never believed in that superstition stuff and continued your search. The next thing you searched up was "Uranium City"

You click on the first link being wikipedia, not bothering to scroll. Reading it you took mind to bits that you felt were important to know. It told you that the population was 90. Makes sense didn't think there would be too many people here. Scanning over the history you read what catches your eye. Parts that told you how uranium was used for mines, specifically mining Uranium (who would've guessed) this caused the population to grow a thrive. That was until the closure of the mines in 1982 that caused many residents to move. Leading it to be the small town it is today. After scrolling a bit on the wiki page you didn't seem to find anything you wanted. You started to read the recent news section. All you were able to read was "fall fair accident" before you heard your mother call your name from the stairs. Leading you to close your computer and forget anything about the fall fair and what this accident may be.

postcard translation - To Mischa Bachinski

We hope that you are doing well with your new family. We send this letter with some unfortunate news. Sadly your mother has passed away this morning. The doctors say it's due to uranium poisoning. Unless you and your new family have the money for a funeral, we are forced to bury her in a tax supported grave with no funeral.

Our deepest apologies. The UNICEF

I might write what Mischa wrote on those letters. Let me know if you guys want to see that. Was not expecting this chapter to almost be the same size as the last one oops.

#ghosts #mischa bachinski #mischa ride the cyclone #mischa rtc #mischa x reader #rtc #rtc musical #strangers to lovers #supernatural #talking to ghosts #ocean rtc #ocean o'connell rosenberg #panic attack #ride the cyclone #rtc fanfic

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cece693 · 9 months ago

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Handcuffs (Hannibal Lecter x GN! Reader)

Just wanted a break from writing Percy Jackson fics, so here's something for my favorite slasher :)

Summary: You made Hannibal Lecter fall in love with you, however, that doesn't mean that your cannibal suddenly turns into a normal person. You can't declaw a predator, nor do you want to.

tags: possessive Hannibal, reader loves him, insecurity, handcuffs, no funny business though ☹️

Hannibal was a man of little emotions, his person suit knitted tightly to conceal the darkness he harbored within. But after he met you, that meticulous facade he had spent his entire life perfecting turned to nothing. He allowed you to see him—see past the elegant, cultured mask to the predator lurking beneath. You saw the monster Hannibal Lecter was, and loved him regardless. You didn’t flinch from the truths others would fear, didn’t shy away from the hunger in his eyes or the blood on his hands. You accepted him, wholly, and in that acceptance, Hannibal found a kind of vulnerability he had never allowed himself to feel.

So, to be frightened of losing that bond—over something as trivial as a fleeting conversation—was not irrational to him. You and he were bound together, sewn tightly by an unspoken understanding, an irrevocable trust. It was not love in the conventional sense; it was something deeper, darker, like two conjoined twins who could not survive a separation. You were his, and the very idea of another daring to encroach on what belonged to him was an affront Hannibal could not tolerate.

You lay on the bed, one wrist tethered to the headboard by a pair of handcuffs. The metal was cool and unyielding against your skin, biting just enough to remind you of your restraints without truly hurting. Hannibal stood beside you, his form still as he observed you with that unnerving intensity, his eyes reflecting the dim light like those of a wolf caught between the urge to protect its territory and to devour it whole.

There was no anger in his face, only a calm so controlled it bordered on unnerving. It was the kind of calm that came before a storm—before a decision was made, or a life was taken. You knew better than to argue. The situation was absurd in its own way, but also unmistakably Hannibal. This was his way of showing love, his twisted, possessive proof that he could not and would not risk losing you. After all, if he didn’t care, you would not be breathing right now.

“I didn’t do anything wrong,” you said quietly, meeting his gaze with steady resolve. “You know that, Hannibal.”

He remained silent, his eyes narrowing ever so slightly as he watched you. Then he took a step closer, his fingers brushing over the curve of your cheek, trailing down to your jaw. The touch was gentle, but there was a possessiveness in the way his thumb grazed your skin.“The fault is not yours,” he conceded, his voice a low murmur. “But there are others—pigs—who think they can encroach upon what is mine.”

He moved his hand lower, letting his fingers curl around the cuff on your wrist. “I am not a man who shares,” he continued, his voice like dark velvet, smooth but edged with something dangerous. “Nor am I one who takes kindly to trespassers. You belong to me.”

“And I do,” you replied softly, letting the words fall between you like a vow. “You don’t have to worry. No one else even comes close.”

For a moment, Hannibal's expression softened, though only slightly. He leaned in, so close that you could feel the warmth of his breath on your skin, the faint scent of his cologne mingling with something unmistakably him. “You speak as though you understand,” he whispered, his lips brushing lightly against your ear, “but humans are fickle creatures. Even the strongest bonds can unravel if pulled upon by the wrong hands.”

You tilted your head just enough for it to hover near his ear. A whisper, a vow. “Not ours. Not this.” You rattled the cuff slightly for emphasis, giving a faint smile. “You don’t need these, Hannibal. You know I’m not going anywhere.”

A shadow of something almost like doubt flickered in Hannibal's face, which you didn't catch. Hannibal was not a man who often second-guessed himself, but when it came to you, there was a vulnerability he despised, a quiet dread that perhaps, one day, he would wake to find you gone.

Instead of unlocking the cuff, Hannibal eased himself onto the bed beside you. The mattress dipped slightly under his weight as he slid close, his arm looping around your waist with a possessive grip that didn’t quite loosen. He pressed his chest against your side, his legs intertwining with yours as though to form a barrier, ensuring you could not slip away even if you wanted to.

You felt his breath stir the hairs on the back of your neck as he spoke, his voice low and almost tender. “It is not you I distrust,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your temple. “It is the world. The world is full of banal, foolish people who do not understand the bond we share. I will not allow anyone to fracture it.”

His hand moved up your back, his fingers splaying against your spine as though grounding himself in the reality of your presence. “You have spoiled me, my dear,” he continued, his tone dropping to a near whisper, “with your loyalty, with your love. And now, I am left with the knowledge that I could not bear to be without you.”

You nestled closer to him, feeling the tension gradually bleed from his form as he adjusted his hold around you. The handcuff remained fastened, but it felt less like a restraint now, more like a reminder of his claim on you. His thumb traced small circles over your skin, soothing in its rhythm.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you said softly, your voice laced with affection. “You’re stuck with me, Hannibal. Whether you like it or not.”

He let out a low, almost inaudible chuckle, a rare sound that warmed your heart and made you fall more in love with this monster. “Indeed,” he agreed, pressing a kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering there as though he could seal the promise into your skin. “And I would not have it any other way.”

As his breathing began to slow, the grip around your waist eased just enough to allow you to shift comfortably against him. But even in sleep, his arm remained draped over you, his fingers curling possessively into the fabric of your clothes. It was a silent promise, a wordless reminder that even in his most vulnerable moments, he would not let you go.

You listened to the rhythmic thrum of his heartbeat, steady and strong, a soothing lullaby that seemed almost out of place for a man who carried so much darkness inside him. But it was real—just like his love for you, just like the monster you had chosen to love in return.

As the darkness of the room wrapped around you both, you let your eyes close, feeling the weight of his possessiveness settle over you like a protective shroud. There was comfort in knowing that you belonged to him—and that he belonged to you in return, even if it was in the most unconventional, twisted way.

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fbfh · 1 year ago

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hey i was wondering how mischa from rtc would react to a reader being on their period- tysm!

Mischa... Mischa Mischa Mischa.... he calls you up because he's already on his way over to your place but he missed the sound of your voice too much to wait. Or as he put it, "my heart is a cathedral, your voice is the ringing of the bells, the doves that fly above. each moment I am away from you, it is no longer house of worship because there is no divinity, no angels to deliver salvation, no embrace of heaven's gates."

so he shows up and sees you all snuggled up on the couch in your crusty comfy bed rotting clothes, but the way he looks at you is so sincerely the way someone else would look at the most breathtaking supermodel. he looks at you with that raw ukrainian passion and rushes forward to you. he takes your face so tenderly in his hands presses your foreheads together before he kisses you.

"oh, my beloved, my kokhanyy..." your stomach always does that little twisty flippy thing when he calls you kokhanyy - beloved in ukrainian. he's been using the pet name for as long as you can remember, but it still makes you all flustered. he kisses you some more and notices you don't seem to be quite yourself. he crouches down next to you, holding your hand in both of his, kissing it and holding it to his cheek as he asks what's wrong. you tell him you woke up to your period this morning and all you want to do is curl up in a ball and not move.

"period, period..." he murmurs, trying to remember what the ukrainian translation is. "oh, menstruatsiya!"

"yeah, menstruatsiya." you chuckle.

"oh, my dove..." he says, pulling you close to him. he rests your head on his chest, stroking your hair or caressing your cheek. "it is a most beautiful thing. the blood of your womb gives way to the seeds of new life. It is like a kiss from the stars, it is telling you that you are a strong, fertile tree, bursting with the fruit of life."

you look up at him, smiling softly, touched by his words.

"besides, squeezing lining of organs out of bleeding hole is gangster as SHIT, yo!" he exclaims, jumping up before kissing your hand again.

"I go get you chocolates and medovik." he says as he rushes out, then turns around.

"honey cake. very good, very comforting." he clairifies. you chuckle to yourself as he rushes out to get you some sweets and comfort food. you really don't know what you'd do without him.

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chachued · 1 year ago

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࿐ ˗ˏˋ lego date with lando norris

it started with cars in the basket. big and small. then the lego bouquets. or simply singular flowers. picking and choosing any set that looks cool on display. rushing home — laying on the carpeted floor. spending hours upon hours because the both of you got distracted by a show playing in the background. stressing when lando accidentally loses a piece. him needing help when he combined two parts that weren’t right. going to get snacks and coming back to an assortment of messes. lando repeating the words “what can i do without you?”

#mischa’s moodboards #lando norris #lando norris x reader #f1 x reader #f1 #lando norris moodboards #lando norris imagine #f1 moodboards #mclaren #fluff

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loveundrwrld · 1 year ago

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yandere alphabet- yandere femboy

template i used can be found here

(cws: blackmail, violence mention, very unhealthy relationship dynamic, stalking)

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

he can be very smothering with his affection, very touchy and clingy. he likes to hug your arm or hold your hand, rest his head on you, and cover your face with light kisses. but, with his verbal affection- he’s more sugary sweet than he is passionate or intense.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

mischa is not the violent type, nor is he really able to fight anyone... sorry reader, but he's not willing at all to get his hands dirty. both since he wouldn't know how to fight, but also since he thinks of himself as being better than people who use violence on others. he thinks of himself as a normal person, who doesn't need to lower himself to such things... despite everything else that he does. he’d also be deeply unnerved and scared in any situation in which physical violence is involved, for both your sake and his own.

in the right circumstances though, he may blackmail someone, manipulate someone, or lie to ruins someone’s reputation… but that’s mostly if he feels threatened by a romantic rival.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

mischa is a little sadistic in the emotional sense, but he's more likely to tease you or to poke at your issues while pretending to be innocent. he’s more trying to get a reaction out of you than to actually hurt your feelings though.

he has a general sense of when he’s gone way too far in his teasing of you, and he’ll ease up on that sort of thing for a bit if so. and, naturally, turn up the affection towards you to distract and comfort you.

generally speaking, he’s very clingy, needy, and affectionate- he spends a lot of time around you. just about as much as he can get away with, really.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

yes- kissing and cuddling. he'd be pouty if his darling refused his affection, and would try to act upset so that you would feel bad enough to let him kiss you. he can be pushy and insistent on getting you to lower your boundaries… like allowing him to sleep in the same room as you, or letting him sit in you lap.

he’ll also make sure that you say things like “i love you” or call him pet names from time to time. after all, he does that to you, so why not return the favor?

he isn’t pushy about sex though, that for him is something he can easily do without.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

since part of his ideal relationship is to essentially act a certain role 24/7… he is not vulnerable to you in any real way, not at all.

even though he loves to put on crocodile tears and feign being hurt or insulted by things, he's actually not going to tell you about his real fears and insecurities. it may seem strange to you that he seems so open with some things, but also seems strangely cagey about others.

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

if you physically attacked him, he'd be shocked and would probably be very offended. he doesn't see himself as being an actual threat to you, so this would be a betrayal in his eyes.

but if you just stood up for yourself verbally- he’d just pretend that you were being cruel or mean to him, in the hopes that you’ll think that you were overreacting. but, secretly he is pleasantly surprised and amused that you did- he finds it fun to mess around with you, seeing how long it takes for you to decide that enough is enough.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

seeing how you react to him, and how much he can push your boundaries before you react is very much a game to him. he's amused by seeing you squirm and sigh when you're overwhelmed.

seeing you try to spend less time with him or avoid him does upset him a little though. he does genuinely want to spend as much time as possible with you, after all.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

a darling who doesn’t do anything he asks, and is evasive, avoidant, and emotionally distant to him would also cause him to reach a certain reaction from him… where he feels he needs to step up what he’s doing to get any sort of fun out his darling. this is where he gets more emotionally sadistic, and risks angering you to just get a response out of you. maybe he should text your ex strange things, or maybe he’ll secretly let people know about some of the stuff you have that you thought was well hidden in his room…

and, of course, he’ll be there for you while you’re scared, anxious, and confused…

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

he definitely wants to be married, to keep his darling by his side forever. he wants his darling to do a lot of the ‘hard parts’ of life for him, and let him live a very spoiled and pampered life. so, probably both cooking and cleaning, as well as things like taxes or yardwork…

although he would love to essentially be a cutesy trophy husband, he does know that to have the lifestyle he wants he’ll likely have to settle for both you and him having jobs. sadly </3

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

he does get jealous, both of platonic relationships (you getting attention in general) as well as any romantic partners... past or present.

if you had a longterm partner while you met him- he’d be very quick to try and ruin your relationship, and possibly try to decimate your partners reputation. he may pretend that your partner hit him to make you want to break up with them, or something similar.

when he gets jealous he doesn’t lash out in the typical way, but he lets out his frustration in strange ways. he’ll be a little passive aggressive when talking about the other person with you, subtly digging on them. “hm… they sure do chew very loudly, don’t they? that’d be very annoying to hear that on dates, wouldn’t it? just thinking.”

he’ll also be teasing you more, making you do all these favors for him to see you fret over him… it helps make him feel less stressed. after spending some time with you he can calm down. though, he’ll still try to manipulate situations so that you won’t spend so much time with that person anymore.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

he acts like a clingy and loving, but ditzy and sensitive boyfriend to you. he wants all of his strange behavior to come off as him being “needy” or something similar. it’s not that he’s breaking your boundaries, it’s that he’s sad and needs comfort.

essentially, he likes being seen as cute and innocent with people, and that extends to you too.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

generally using you for amusement and attention at first, just like he does with everyone else. then, he’ll essentially just… casually show up around you or text you more often. it’s less that he’s trying to convince you to date him, since he has a big ego and believes that you are lucky to have him. he just knows that forcing you to date him too soon could end up in you getting freaked out and ghosting him or something.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

yes, mischa is the type of yandere to fake his personality (see:kisses above.) he’s a manipulator and quite a bit selfish, but he acts cutesy and nice with others.

the way he acts with his darling is just a more intense and focused version of how he used to treat everyone around him. to an extent he still acts that way around everyone too, he just pays significantly less attention to other people.

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

he’d never admit to it being why he does it, but loudly crying around other people works well for this purpose. it gets his darling to be more nervous of repeating the same behavior in the future, while also guilt-tripping them…

also, while he wouldn't normally go to such extremes, see: hell above.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

much like with tanner he generally lets you do whatever you want, but is just... also there with you. or he drags you to wherever he wants you to go, but the only thing stopping you from leaving is social etiquette (and if you’d feel bad for him for being “upset” that you did that.)

he's not necessarily strict, but he is very manipulative. he doesn't really need to force you to not be around your close friends... he takes up so much attention and energy from you that you don't have time for most other people. and he can just convince you in other ways to spend less time with them.

if you are more of a naïve and/or a people pleasing type, he's very likely to successfully get his way in what he wants.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

he thinks of you being unwilling or resistant as amusing, basically. he isn’t the type to get all that angry at you, at worst he’ll be passive aggressive. but he does get impatient when he feels that he isn’t getting your full attention, so he’s quick to become more blatant with his efforts to manipulate you.

and, he becomes less patient when he starts to feel jealous. he thinks of everyone else as ‘unworthy’ of your attention and thinks of himself as ‘worthy’ of it… it makes him irritated as he feels slighted from you not recognizing this like he does.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

he does actually love you, so this would be very hard for him.

if you died, he'd be in shock. he'd be depressed for a long time... he had never even thought that this was a possibility. he'd have a lot of difficulty pretending to be cheery and playful, and may never get over the loss.

if you escaped (as in, moved to a new city or something without warning) he’d scramble to try to follow their lead and try to find you. but, he doesn’t have a ton of resources and connections, so it would be very difficult for him. he would try very hard for a long time, though, as he does genuinely want you by his side again.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

despite doing things that are definitely illegal, mischa doesn’t think of himself as being a “criminal” and thinks of himself as being above such a thing. to him, stalking is only technically illegal, so he thinks of himself as being a normal person.

instead of abducting his darling in the typical sense, he’d rather just cling to them under more ‘normal’ circumstances. the closest extreme that i think he’d go to is showing up in your house and not leaving. he would feel pretty guilty if you're clearly terrified of him after that… after all, even if he messes with you his goal is never to make you think you are in any genuine danger. he'd just be more sweet and giving towards you for a while, hoping that will help you calm down and acclimate to the situation a bit.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

mischa grew up in a good family who loved him, but he did have some issues growing up.

his family immigrated from germany when he was relatively young. his parents became more busy with their jobs and had difficulties acclimating to the culture and language, which both often distracted them from spending time with him. he at the time also felt isolated from those around him, and wanted to cling more to his parents as a result. he's used to acting out for attention and getting rewarded for it, as his tired parents just wanted to give him what he wanted whenever he threw a tantrum.

he's never really faced any consequences for his actions and knows that he likely won't, so to him... if he wants you, why not have you?

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

i think he'd be unnerved at a true breakdown, screaming or anything similar would make him feel a bit guilty and reflect on his actions. did he really do so much to make you snap like that? he'd be more cautious for a while, and may tread lightly around you for a bit. he'll keep a careful eye on you to assess why you’re having such a breakdown.

if it's just crying, he does feel a little guilty, but he’s much less worried. if anything, he sees this as an opportunity for him. he sees that as an opportunity to cuddle them and pretend to be the typical loving caring boyfriend- he's thinking this will likely make you feel more attached to him.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

it's not necessarily a moral thing, but as i said in blood above, he's not really going to hurt anyone physically, much less kill them. he also won't abduct the reader in the typical sense.

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

mischa is short and physically weak, so it's not hard at all to intimidate him.

also, see: regret above… you aren’t being abducted and tied down, so in theory you do have the freedom to do whatever you want. if you are able to avoid him for a bit, you do have a lot of options available to you.

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

nope! he's not the type to hurt his darling... not physically, at least.

however, he can have some sadistic tendencies when it comes to teasing you or putting them in a situation that scares or bothers you (such as trying to trick a darling who's afraid of spiders into letting one crawl on them, sending the darling notes to make them know that they have a stalker to get them scared and paranoid... etc)

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

he doesn’t show it in the typical way as many yanderes would, but he does put you on a pedestal in his head. after all, he sees everyone around him as being ‘below’ you and being ‘unworthy’ of your time and attention.

he does smother you with high praise and compliments, and its coming from a real place as he really does find his darling attractive, sweet, kind, charming, etc.

but a significant reason for him doing so is for his own sake- he knows that his affections towards you, both verbally and physically, are going to make you more likely to fall for him. he’s definitely putting a concerted effort into winning you over… he’s certain that it will happen eventually, he just wants it to happen sooner rather than later.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

depends on what "snap" means in this context, since his behavior doesn't really suddenly escalate. he starts off strong and then there's a quick escalation, but there's no real point of him 'snapping' into something extreme.

but, if this just means 'general yandere behavior and manipulation'... it's not a very long time at all. once he realizes he's jealous of others getting your attention, he fairly quickly realizes how he's feeling and tries to get you to be around him more often. this probably takes a few weeks or so. then, he slowly escalates over a few months or so as he tries to see just how far he can take things.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

although he's not violent or extreme like the typical yandere, you are likely going to be mentally exhausted by his antics and being around him all the time. i think that in general he is the type of yandere that would very much wear you down over time until you get to a breaking point.

so, you wouldn't break in the typical way this word is used for yandere stories- but you would very likely have an emotional breakdown after a while.

#yandere x reader #gender neutral reader #yandere alphabet #yandere x you #yandere femboy #mischa roth #tried something new w/ the edit this time :^)#also thank u for your patience anon who requested this!!

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sincerely-astra · 4 months ago

Note

Since it makes some time since someone requested Yandere choir....

The choir with the most anxious girl in town?

Darling is like Penny, but just way more paranoid, anxious and shy, and most people at school find her weird and mock her social anxiety

Thanks in advance! :))

☁️Yandere Choir x Anxious!Reader🌧️

⚠️WARNING: General Yandere content and geared towards a fem reader!⚠️

Ocean O'Connell Rosenberg:

Introductions were the worst. Having everyone stare at you while you struggled to get the words, "Hello, my name is Y/N." out was not an enjoyable experience, especially when basically everyone in the classroom was snickering at your pathetic attempt to speak. As you kept stuttering through it, your anxiety peaking in you, the teacher finally let you off the hook and said, "That's enough Ms. Y/N, please go take a seat next to Ocean. Ocean, please raise your hand-" The teacher had no need to request that though as Ocean's hand shot up the moment she mentioned you would be sitting next to her.

You make your way over, where Ocean gives you a nod of acknowledgment as a greeting before turning back to the teacher. Normally she would've introduced herself already, but she needed to pay attention to the lesson, and so should you as you're gonna need to catch up! Other than that, the lesson went pretty smoothly, minus the few whispers you'd hear behind you during the beginning of it.

Thankfully, class ended quickly enough and as you got up, packing your things, Ocean comes up to your desk and holds her hand out as if she's expecting a handshake. You hesitantly shake her hand, which has a much stronger grip than yours, and she starts to speak, "I wanted to introduce myself before we have to go to our next classes. As Mrs. Jones said, I am Ocean O'Connell Rosenberg and the head of the chamber choir here at St. Cassian!" She held a prideful smile on her face as she spoke, soon continuing on as she introduced more about the school and the choir she mentioned.

You didn't get much of a word in either, even as you got up to start walking to your next class, which you two just happened to share, Ocean kept going on and on. It's not like you minded too much, though. Saves you the trouble from having to think of something to say and you were honestly just glad she wasn't making fun of you like those other kids were...

It hadn't even been a week after you met her either, where you were finally convinced by Ocean to join the choir she was always mentioning. Like, always mentioning.

You two had talked almost every day at that point and she had invited you to sit with her and the choir for lunch on multiple occasions, though you always declined because you didn't think you'd be comfortable sitting and talking with so many new people all at once... So how did she manage to get you to join the choir then? You have literally zero idea... Maybe it was Ocean praising it 24/7, or her speech about all the benefits it has and how you should join to make some new friends. Whatever it was, you walked in with Ocean that next choir rehearsal.

She introduced you to the choir and Father Markus, explaining how you are their newest member! A girl named Constance was the first to come up to you to welcome you into the choir, which she mostly did, but Ocean eventually had to cut her off so practice could move along. Now, the one thing you told Ocean you weren't gonna do by joining the choir, even though it was choir, was sing, which to your surprise, Ocean said was fine since another kid named Ricky was also in the choir and he didn't sing either.

That's how you ended up sitting next to a boy you barely know, temporarily without an instrument as they would have to borrow one from the band.

Despite how friendly most of the choir members were, save for Noel and Mischa, you pretty much clung to Ocean most of the time. As the only person you really knew there, she was like your lifeline as you didn't feel comfortable around the others quite yet... Now, if this was anyone else, they might have thought you were being annoying and too clingy, but this was Ocean and she thought the complete opposite. She reveled in the attention you gave her as not only did it feed her ego, but she also found herself enjoying your presence a lot.

You don't send annoyed eye rolls her way whenever she talks about her accomplishments and what she wants to do in the future, you don't make her feel bad that she needs to feel successful, you don't push her about her homelife and why she smells marijuana most days. You aren't like everyone else and she loves that, she can finally let her guard down around someone, something she can't even do with Constance. You're her vice.

If you ever start feeling overwhelmed with life and just need something to distract you, Ocean will 100% be your best bet for that. She will talk your ear off even if you didn't ask her to, which helps a lot when you just need to hear something in the background while you calm down.

Ocean, being the overachiever she is, knows how to do pretty much everything and she will be passing those skills down to you. She will be teaching you all kinds of different languages, instruments, crafts, everything and anything you want to learn, she will teach you.

Surprisingly, she is also a good mentor figure too.

Ocean isn't really the type to give you her things to wear, mainly because she doesn't have that many clothes to begin with, but if you ever ask, she would probably give you something like a piece of jewelry or a headband.

The more time she spends with you, the more Ocean just enjoys being in your presence... She never really thought she could like you more than she did, but getting to know you on a deeper level and having you come to her for most of your problems makes her feel so unimaginably happy. Suddenly, you aren't gonna be the only clingy one anymore and she isn't letting you out of her sight.

Whenever you guys pass notes to each other in class (which Ocean discourages as she says it's distracting but continues to do anyway because it's you,) Ocean always ends up keeping the notes you pass to her and when she isn't with you, she'll go through them, running her fingers along the words you wrote so she can feel close to you, even when you aren't with her.

You will never have to worry about people mocking you or being mean to you ever again with Ocean around because the people that do will be thoroughly run over with her words and her connection with the principal (Whom she will not stop bothering when someone is rude to you.) Word travels quick in St. Cassian and soon, people avoid you like the plague.

Ocean is lowkey either the best or worst person to be around when you have anxiety, there is no in between.

On those good days though, she'll take a break from whatever she is doing just to go find a quiet place for you to calm down in. She also has snacks that Constance gives her that she will let you eat.

As much as Ocean loves and cares about you, she will also not be letting you into her house... She would hate to have her parents' behavior affect you in any negative way, so her house is basically banned from you.

Even if you can't go to Ocean's house though, that doesn't mean she isn't allowed at yours, which believe me, she is there pretty much every day.

You and Ocean were in your bedroom, Ocean ranting about something a teacher said while finishing up her homework, while you were snuggled up on your bed, half listening and half watching a movie. It was your average afternoon, a routine that you and Ocean had grown comfortable with after doing it for so long.

And Ocean had liked it that way, she liked predictability, she liked having a routine only you and her share. She liked having things stay the same as always.

...But she supposes she doesn't mind you changing things up a bit either.

"I'm glad you're here, you know... You are like, the one person I feel comfortable around." Your words were full of adoration and were a complete shock to Ocean, who immediately stopped writing, turning to face you with wide eyes.

For some reason, even though Ocean had never thought of you that way, those words made her heart skip several beats and her face flush red. Quite frankly, her having such a visceral reaction to your words was making her feel incredibly embarrassed for herself... How come all of a sudden, when you just said something that she's sure everyone says to their friends, she starts to feel like she's the most special girl in the whole world? Why are her hands suddenly fidgeting? Why do her words have a stutter to them now as she replied with, "Y-You should, I'm a very comfortable person to be around!"

This feeling she's never felt before..., it couldn't be love could it??

...

Seeing you make a huff of amusement at her words, your smile bright as you turn back to your movie...

Well, maybe change is good. Maybe loving you isn't all bad.

So, one of the ways Ocean shows her love to you, is that even if she is an eternal yapper at heart and she knows you don't mind listening to her, she now is very adamant in listening to you and what you have to say, even if that's nothing at all.

She loves hearing your voice.

She would become so red if you did her hair, like put it into braids or just play with it, it just feels so weirdly intimate and domestic that she can't help but become so flustered.

There are a lot of moments where she's afraid of doing anything she sees as too intimate since she doesn't want you to possibly reject her and her feelings. Even then, though, she has a hard time not just being near you and showering you with praise.

Ocean has a bad habit of talking over people. Most of the time, it's unintentional, but there are moments when someone is talking to you for whatever reason and she'll just come up and crash the whole conversation. Those times, it's definitely not an accident.

Sometimes when she's writing an essay or just anything in general, her mind will wander and she'll end up writing paragraphs all about you. Some of the stuff gets a bit strange too..., like how she wrote 2 paragraphs on why she likes the way you walk.

As your friend, and hopefully potential lover, she should be helping you with your anxiety, right? Well, she does for the most part, but Ocean can't but place some fear in you sometimes when it comes to talking with strangers or going anywhere without her. It's for your own good, she doesn't want anyone to hurt you.

Noel Gruber:

Noel was having a bad day today.

Okay, so he has a bad day every day, but that fact that he's acknowledging today was really bad means a lot for how his day was going so far.

First off, some stupid douchebags were making fun of him for being openly queer, then he had to deal with his teacher pulling him out of class even though the kids behind him were making a ruckess, then he had to deal with Ocean during lunch. All of this combined made him want to bang his head against a wall.

Thankfully though, it was all almost over, all he had to do was turn the corner, walk a few paces, do choir, and he could finally go home. He just needed to get through this final stretch of the day and all would be well. So, walking down the route he usually takes to go to choir, he slowly starts to turn the corner, not at all realizing that someone was also making their way past it...

That person being you.

You both knock into each other, knocking you back and Noel onto the ground below. Noel lets out a grunt of both hurt and frustration, quickly looking up to the perpetrator so he could scold them for their carelessness, his frustration levels hitting their peak as this was kind of his last straw. However, as soon as he looks up at you, he couldn't even get a word out as you promptly apologized, anxiousness in both your voice and behavior was evident. "I'm so sorry! I really didn't mean to do that, I should've looked past the corner or something. Are you hurt? Did you break anything? Should I take you to the nurse?-" Questions flew out of your mouth at lightning speed as you nervously flailed your arms around while you tried to explain yourself.

This kind of reaction from anyone at St. Cassian was new for Noel as most people wouldn't even bother to apologize and would just insult him before walking off. It's not like it was all your fault either, so this was really strange for him... Awkwardly, he gets up from the tiled floor and adjusts himself, ignoring your rambling before speaking over you, "I'm fine, stop worrying so much." Which thankfully got you to calm down a little. Noel was honestly kind of at a loss for words in the moment, wanting to say something else to you, but he didn't know quite what to say... So, he just shrugs it off and walks past you to the choir room, muttering a, "Sorry...," as he passes by.

That was your first introduction to each other and apparently it wouldn't be the last as soon enough you joined the choir.

Becoming friends (Whenever you got into the choir, he noticed Ocean enjoying having you cling to her, which he hated, so he starts to become your friend to spite her. He soon enjoys being your friend though.)

As Ocean had done a million times before with every other member of the choir, as she was pretty much the reason they all joined in the first place save for Mischa who was forced to, Ocean introduces you to everyone before Constance goes up to you and takes up your attention. He noticed you looked just as nervous as ever, which wasn't surprising, but what was surprising was the glow on Ocean's face after the choir rehearsal had ended as you clung to her. He knows her prideful face when he sees it, and apparently having you cling to her instead of any other choir member was giving her an ego boost she so desperately craved.

Now, Noel doesn't hate Ocean, he really doesn't. Sure, she can be annoying at times and he gets onto her a lot for being an ass to people, but that doesn't mean he hates the girl. In a way, they were kind of like siblings, at least, that's how Noel saw it. But watching you stand by her side like a loyal puppy with Ocean having a power trip over it made a switch flip inside of him. It was annoyingly pathetic how much you relied on Ocean and Noel wasn't having it. He knew you needed some kind of guidance in this school by someone who's been through hell in it, so he's gonna help you.

He's convinced himself he has to, otherwise you are going to have a rough time here.

So, whenever Ocean is busy with something else and you are left to stand idly by her side, Noel makes it his mission to go and talk to you. This turned out to be a good decision on his part as well since you were surprisingly pleasant to talk to unlike most people at St. Cassian. Your anxiousness did mean he needed to do most of the talking, but he could really care less, if he had to wait an eternity for you to get out of your shell and treat him like a normal human being compared to everyone else, then so be it.

You also enjoyed this dynamic you had with Noel. You did love and appreciate Ocean taking you under her wing and becoming your friend, but having Noel there was different in a good way. He showed you which places and people to avoid, where the good hiding spots are, how to get away with taking a nap in the nurse's office, basically, he was the street smarts to Ocean's book smarts. You had to even admit, he had a way of making it actually fun to let go and talk to him, something you'd never thought you'd be able to do. It was refreshing.

Noel doesn't mind how anxious you get at all, he's kind of friends with Penny and despite how confident he is, he's had his moments too, so he's pretty good at helping you manage your anxiety.

Sometimes though, just because he thinks it's kind of funny, he'll come up behind you when you are least expecting it and spook you. If you do end up having like, a panic attack or something because of it though, he'll feel so awful and will help you out immediately.

He loves having you read to him because, as you don't talk much, he finds it nice to hear your voice.

If you're ever hungry, trust that Noel will let you eat all his Taco Bell leftovers, he could literally care less.

Noel is extremely picky on who you spend your time with and if you don't fight back somewhat, you probably wouldn't talk to anyone but him.

He will also be making you give him access to all your social media accounts and no, this is not negotiable. He wants no creeps near you and probably ends up turning on some kind of child safety features on your phone.

He will give you a screen time so you are forced to talk to him.

You can literally appear at his house in the middle of the night, and Noel will not care at all, he trusts you completely.

If your anxiety ever gets too bad, he might help you find a therapist to talk to that's not the school one since Dr. Prattle is the worst.

You're more than welcome to come to him to vent though if that's what you'd prefer.

Noel hates the idea of you keeping secrets from him, like, a lot. So, because he wants to try and lean you in the right direction so you feel comfortable sharing things with him, he shows you Monique. He was undeniably anxious when he first showed her to you, because he might literally die if his biggest obsession finds his other biggest obsession weird, but thankfully that wasn't the case and his plan actually worked! After telling you about her, you pretty much get weekly updates on Monique and her story since he changes and adds things frequently.

Now the only biggest secret being kept between you was his sexuality!

Except it wasn't because you had known for a long time...

You knew because 1. Noel wasn't exactly secret about it. 2. Anytime you are with Noel at school, someone always manages to pass by and whisper slurs at him. And lastly, 3. It was kind of obvious.

Now, this does save him the whole coming out ordeal but Noel has to admit that he hates that he never got to formally tell you... It's just so important to him, and having something like that ripped away was honestly heartbreaking.

Please give him hugs and tell him he'll be alright- He needs it.

Do people still bully you even though you are with Noel? Yeah, it's actually kind of gotten worse since you've become friends with Noel. But you at the very least have each other and even if Noel has no power to stop the bullies, if any of them lay a finger on you, he's gonna kick some ass.

His mom actually adores you so much, you are the daughter she never had and she just thinks you're so precious. (She's low-key also encourages Noel's darker thoughts, but moving on...)

You're required to hang out with him during his work shifts, he needs someone to talk to that isn't his burdensome coworkers, and you're by far the best option.

Noel sometimes paints you, but he never lets you see the final result since he's embarrassed about it.

If you look past all the awful notes and stuff that your bullies put in your locker, sometimes you'll find a note threatening you to stay away from certain people and to do certain things that make you end up isolating yourself. You have zero clue, but that's all Noel...

Noel knows it's bad, but sometimes he has fantasies of bad things happening to you. It's dark and twisted, but his whole life is romanticizing tragedy, and he just loves you so much that he can't help himself but to imagine the worst possible scenarios, even going as far as to write about it sometimes.

Noel would never hurt you under any circumstance, you're way too special for him to do that to you!

...

But if you ever did try leaving, he does know a few ingredients to knock you out for a while.

Mischa Bachinski:

Mischa has never been one to cry, sure, he may get so angry that he feels like he wants to cry out from frustration, but rarely does he ever actually cry. It's a trait he's proud of, he feels like it makes him look not as weak. It makes him not look like the sobbing little boy he was when he was ripped away from his mother.

Truthfully, he hasn't cried since then, he would never allow himself to. If this world was only ever gonna break his heart over and over with no signs of comfort or relief, then he wasn't going to give it the satisfaction of him bawling his eyes out.

...

That was until Talia, the absolute love of his life, broke up with him.

He didn't think it was possible he could cry as much as he was right now, his eyes were puffy and red, his cheeks stained with tears that just kept flowing, and his phone laid on the bed in front of him showing past texts of him and Natalia. He hated how weak he felt, but god did this hurt.

Mischa had been crying for hours at this point, skipping school entirely as he knew he couldn't handle it today. He needed some kind of comfort, something to take his mind off of the hurt in his heart. And what better way to do that than to vent to some online strangers.

Finally grabbing his phone and swiping off his past text messages with Natalia, Mischa goes to the internet, gets on some old chat room site he uses occasionally to vent out his frustrations, and he taps a button to connect him with someone. It took a minute to connect him to someone, which he can only contribute to the crappy internet in the basement, but eventually he connected with someone which was, of course, you.

The conversation was a little awkward at the start, with you trying to navigate through the conversation without triggering your anxiety and with Mischa trying to find some segway to where he could just get all of the horrible emotions he was feeling in the moment out. Mischa did find his segway at some point, and you being the kind person you are, listened to his problems. You guys actually talked for hours and eventually also traded phone numbers to talk more. (P.S. I don't know who needs to hear this, but don't give out your phone number to random people online- Learn internet safety.)

Your long conversations didn't just stop there either; it might have been the fact that you both were strangers or the fact that this was online, but you both found comfort in each other and found it easy to tell each other everything. You learned so much about each other, you learned of Mischa's Youtube channel, how he used to live in Ukraine, how he is in the choir at his school, and Mischa learned about your anxiety, where you lived, and about your bullies. With that last one, he promised you if he ever met them, he wouldn't hesitate to punch them, something you thought was a joke but he was dead serious about.

All of this was to say that you and Mischa became good friends, even if it was online. You helped him in so many different ways, especially when it came to getting over Natalia, and he helped you gain confidence in yourself, it's almost too good to be true.

But it was true.

And it was only going up from here.

On a late Sunday night, you and Mischa were chatting like usual. Nothing was totally out of the ordinary with Mischa just ranting about this one rapper he likes and you listening, but as he is mid-way through his rant, you ask him, "Hey Mischa, what school do you go to?" To which, he immediately responded with, "St. Cassian High School, it's school for whiny, privileged kids, why?" Luckily and unbeknownst to Mischa, this was exactly the information you wanted to hear as you excitedly blurt out, "Oh good, I'm moving to Uranium and I didn't know if there were more than one high school or not."

That was the news of the century for Mischa, his eyes going wide as he heard you say that over the speaker in his phone. He practically jumped out of his seat, taking his phone with him as he ecstatically started to pace around the basement. "For reals!? Do not joke with me right now, it's not funny." But you weren't joking in the slightest, you meant every word.

You were moving to Uranium and going to St. Cassian. Mischa will finally be able to see his best friend in person and not even for just a few days, but for now and the foreseeable future. If Mischa is allowed to have just one good thing in life, he's glad it's this.

Mischa made sure to be kept up to date with everything that was happening during your move, calling you every chance he got just to see how it was going as a small part of him was fearful that things wouldn't end up the way he so wished they would...

Thankfully though, they did and as soon as you were in Uranium and let out of your new house by your parents, you and Mischa immediately met at the nearest park which was pretty close to your house.

To say that Mischa was beyond excited to see you was an understatement, he seriously felt like a kid again and had to calm himself down while he waited for you so he didn't scare you off or anything... Of course, that didn't last long though because as soon as you got there he couldn't contain his feelings and immediately ran over to hug you. He couldn't help himself..., you are just so different in person in the best of ways, you're so pretty, he loves the moments of silence you have when you are trying to think of something to say, he loves the way your hands are always messing with something on your person.

He's so glad to finally have someone near him who truly loves and understands him. Trust him when he says he is never letting you go.

Okay, so, even if this was only for the first few days you were in Uranium, Mischa quickly found himself loving having you cling to him since you didn't know anyone here. He finds it so incredibly adorable.

For whatever reason, Mischa refuses to let you pay for anything- If you ever want something, trust that he's gonna get it for you one way or another, and you are not going to be the one buying it.

As chivalrous as Mischa might be, he will also 100% make fun of you (in a joking way, of course.)

He will stop immediately though if it ever hits too close to home for you, your comfort is far more important to him than a laugh ever will be.

Once you start branching out to more and more people in Uranium, most notably Noel and Ocean, Mischa, for whatever reason, can't help but feel a little jealous... He knows it's good for you to make other friends and it's nice for you to get along with the people he's close to, but whenever Ocean holds on your arm or when Noel ruffles your hair...

It just gives him such an indescribable sense of loneliness and anger.

He wants to squish your cheeks so badly. (That's it, that's the head canon.)

If you are ever feeling down or your anxiety is really getting to you, Mischa will not hesitate to make an absolute fool out of himself trying to cheer you up.

He'll do whatever it takes, whether it be making fun of himself or saying the most unhinged things out of nowhere, he will do it.

So, in order to get to Mischa's room, aka the basement, there are gonna be times where you have to go past his parents. You know all about them from Mischa, and it's safe to say you aren't fond of them in the slightest, his parents aren't that fond of you either... They don't know what you are doing with that boy, but to them, you are way better off not associating with him.

You aren't leaving him though, never in a million years would you ever even think of the prospect.

Mischa never thought he would ever get over his break up with Natalia, not since it broke him in such awful ways that it took months for him to not think about her every second of the day.

And even when he did eventually get over it, he thought it would take a while for him to fall in love again. His heart was now so heavily guarded and he was so scared of having to open up about everything to someone new.

But then, to his absolute shock and somewhat horror, he didn't have to open up to someone new, quite the opposite in fact. Because there eventually came a day when he started to get all flustered and red-faced around you. When he first realized, he almost didn't want to accept it, fearful that it would totally ruin the great relationship you both have so carefully formed, one that he doesn't think he can handle losing.

But the feelings, no matter how hard he tried to push them down, kept coming up, along with the thoughts of holding you in his arms and kissing your soft lips...

He started to not mind those thoughts so much the more he thought about it. Maybe it would nice to hold your hand and whisper sweet nothings to you, in fact, maybe that would be the next best step in your relationship.

Mischa usually wasn't always quick to fall in love, but when he does, he falls hard.

He is always constantly craving your touch, especially in the moments when he can't have it like in class or when he's in his bedroom alone. He's a very touch-starved individual.

Mischa is always making an effort to learn and memorize everything about you, even to an unhealthy degree.

All he wants to do is kiss you, is that so much to ask for?

Mischa has no clue how you came to become friends with a guy like him, but he literally is so grateful for it. He loves you so much it hurts, and thinking of the fact that your paths may have never crossed is such a gut-wrenching thought process.

On the nights where he's missing you really bad, he'll literally just stay up all night scrolling through photos of you on his phone, wishing you were with him or that he could hear your voice.

And sometimes he even takes things a step further and decides to watch you sleep..., he just really needs to see you safe and near him.

Mischa is no stranger to bullies and he is not a stranger to beating said bullies up. He will be beating the crap out of anyone who even dares looks at you wrong, mark his words.

As cheesy as he knows it is, he writes secret admirer letters for you and stuffs them in your locker, most of which have a love poem written in Ukrainian. If you manage to decipher the letter, than be prepared because some of the things he writes about are incredibly disturbing...

Like, sometimes he wants to just murder someone because of how beautiful you are, his passion and love for you not being able to stay contained inside of him.

Ricky Potts:

One of the perks and downfalls of being in the St. Cassian chamber choir as someone who can't speak, is the fact that most of the time, the rest of the choir forgets he's there.

He could literally not be playing whatever instrument they stuck him with this time for the whole song, and Ocean will congratulate him on how well he did. It was a curse in the way that he always felt such an indescribable loneliness at times, but it was also a blessing in that he gets to do one of his favorite activities, people watch! Which was great to do with the rest of the choir since they were fascinating individuals.

And he never really expected this to change as Ocean had been failing for months to get anyone new to join the choir, so he just assumed this was it, this was the group he'd be stuck with before he graduated. Even if he was totally content with that, he definitely didn't mind having you sit next to him on some random whim of Ocean's, giving him a bit of company.

Although you both didn't talk much to begin with, he because he is unable to and you because of your anxiety, eventually you both picked up subtle ways to communicate without speaking or ASL. You both would give each other a certain look that could mean a variety of things or you'd both pick up on each other's body language and act accordingly.

Ricky does wish you'd talk to him at least a little bit, but this was fine to, he gets not everyone is the talkative type. Little did he know, though, that you wanted to be able to talk to him just as much as he did. Ricky seemed really sweet to you and you enjoyed how easily you both could read each other, it was nice, effortless acquaintanceship that you longed to turn into more. But to do that, you'd have to do the one thing that you really hated doing..., talking.

Despite wanting to be his friend, you sure as hell dragged your quiet acquaintance out... It took a very long time for you to get a word out to him without dying on the spot and even longer to be able to actually speak with him.

But when you did, Ricky was so happy for both of you. Even throughout all your stuttering, pauses, and awkward glances away, Ricky really did appreciate stepping out of your comfort zone to talk with him and his way of repaying you was to fill whatever awkward silences with his yapping.

Whether you know ASL or not, he will be talking about everything and anything. People usually don't give him the time of day, so you best believe Ricky has a lot to talk about with you. You don't mind though because it was either that or dealing with a silence that would surely only make your nerves worse..., so obviously you'd choose the former.

For Ricky, he's pretty much known since the day you first showed up to rehearsals that you had some anxiety, it was obvious to him in the way you'd glance around the room occasionally to see what others were doing before copying them, when you would fidget with your hands, and how you'd refuse to make eye contact with anyone. He's very aware of your anxiety and he always tries his best to be someone comforting for you, someone quiet and away from the chaos that is the choir.

Ricky once read that taking walks or just getting out into nature helps people who get overwhelmed really easily, so he pretty much incorporates that whenever he can into your schedules, which means you both usually walk together in peaceful silence during the weekend or after school.

He will not stop trying to get you into every movie franchise he loves, he wants to be able to talk about it with you, but it's really hard when he has to explain the lore 3 times over every single time he has a conversation about it with you.

Since you're stuck on the sidelines with him during choir, he will be trying to teach you some of the instruments they use. Granted, he definitely doesn't know how to play all of them, but he is a very good teacher for the ones he does know!

Almost every sweater he owns will now be in your closet because Ricky just loves seeing you wear his clothes, specifically his sweaters because he thinks you look so cozy in them.

It's also nice to know that other guys can see you wearing things of his and know that you guys are close, even if it's not in the way they think. :)

He likes to draw you for his warmup sketches for no particular reason other than he just likes to draw you. He doesn't show you most of them, but the ones he does show you, he will melt so fast at any praise you give him on them.

Ricky will be trying everything to help you manage your anxiety since he sees how hard it can be for Penny, so he wants to do his best to help you! He'll teach you new breathing exercises, help you find distractions, help you through the 333 rule, etc. Even if none of it works out, he definitely won't stop trying until he finds something that helps you.

If you ever need to like, hold his hand or something when you start to feel overwhelmed, trust that he is right there and his hand is ready to be held! He'll even let you squeeze it as tight as you need to.

Pretty much all of your hangouts will be in private since Ricky isn't too big on going out and junk, he just prefers to have you both in his room or in your room doing whatever. Another big reason though is because he wants to have you to himself.

Now, St. Cassian is a catholic school in a small town in the middle of nowhere Canada, which, as one can probably tell, isn't the most accepting place for people who the population perceives as different. And what they perceive as different, unfortunately includes one Uranium's only nonverbal disabled kid, Ricky.

Ricky's dealt with small amounts of bullying before, mostly in terms of him being neglected and left out by the other kids purposefully, but usually none of the kids at St. Cassian bothered him that much. That was until he was "graced" with the presence of his newest bully, Max Warner.

For god knows what reason, Max was hellbent on making Ricky's life a living hell, be it him tripping Ricky in the hallways, messing with his AAC device, or writing nasty stuff about him on his locker, Max seemed to not be able to get enough of Ricky's suffering. Ricky, being the pacifist he is, wasn't gonna fight him about it necessarily, but he did make sure to tell teachers and the school counselors about it so Max could hopefully get into some kind of trouble. Which he did, but even then Max would just continue on like nothing happened and it was seriously starting to really irk Ricky...

But the most he thought he was able to do was vent out his frustrations to you and continue hammering the teacher about it, he knew no one else was gonna stand up to Max about this since everyone else pretty much ignored his existence and the few who don't, like the choir, didn't know about Max's tyraid. You were the only one who did know.

Never would he have expected you to do anything about it though.

On the tragic day of another bullying attempt by Max, you and Ricky were walking down the hallway that led to the choir room, which was thankfully mostly empty due to it being after school. You both were chatting like normal, not at all expecting Max to just appear behind you both out of nowhere and to grab Ricky by the collar, causing him to lose his balance a bit. It was something Ricky had gotten quite used to, evident by the exhausted, defeated look upon his face as Max just started spouting all sorts of horrible things about him.

You weren't used to this though and watching someone treat Ricky like that, despite the inner panic you were feeling, made a large wave of anger pass through you. No one should be treated like that, especially not Ricky, someone you care so much about and would never want to see hurt.

Listening to Max just go on and on, mocking Ricky and his disability..., there came a point where you just couldn't take it anymore. You couldn't stand to stand aside like everyone else has done in the past, you couldn't stand to watch such a pathetic individual torment your friend.

You could barely process what you had done in those next 10 seconds, other than your fist hurting like hell, and you rushing Ricky out of the hallways and into the choir room. It was only after you both made it and you had the chance to breathe where you could look down at your fist and see the blood on it, the way you got it rushing back to you. You punched Max square in the face. You punched him so hard that his nose started to bleed and a sickening crunch was heard whenever your fist made contact with his face.

You could barely believe you did that... and neither could Ricky.

He would have never in a million years guessed that you were gonna punch someone for him, it was so incredibly surreal... And he loved it. The moment was still playing fresh in his mind, but he would play it 10 times over just to see you care so much about him that you protected him when he couldn't do it himself. His heart was racing so fast and even if he's sure Max will have his head for this, he can't find it in himself to care.

Because he loves you.

He loves you so much.

Remember how I said that if you ever feel overwhelmed, he'd let you hold his hand? Well, now he holds your hand every chance he gets, even if you aren't overwhelmed at all.

Ricky will be getting into everything you are into, no questions asked. Do you like a certain show? He loves that show too! Is there a certain food place you like? What do you know, that's his favorite place as well! Do you collect something? Well good news, because he collects it to and you can have his collection!

Please marry him-

Ricky has been interested in a lot of things in his 17 years on this Earth and one of those things just so happened to be, flowers. Meaning he does know about Floriography and he loves to gift you flowers with specific meanings. His favorites being, Aster (Symbol of love), Baby's breath (Everlasting Love), pink Carnations (I’ll never forget you), and a lot more. If you ever catch on though, he'd probably pretend that he had no idea or say that he meant it in a platonic sense-

You've known about Zolar for a while now, but Ricky gets so excited when you bring it up or if you remember the small details he's shared with you about it, it gets him so happy because he likes to know that you actually care and listen to him.

Ricky might not want to do too much in the case of his bullies, but when it comes to your bullies, it's a totally different story. The fact that anyone tries to bully is reason enough in his book that they don't deserve any semblance of peace or kindness, and he will do anything in his power to get them off your back, and I mean anything.

Ricky, for some reason, likes to smell like you. It's something he knows he's probably picked up from his cats, but he likes it because it's like he's telling other people he's yours and you're his.

He is always so tempted to kiss you in every single moment, but mostly when you are asleep. He thinks you look so adorable and unaware when you sleep..., he really can't resist you sometimes.

He considers every hang out you guys have as a date, even the ones where you both aren't doing anything but just laying next to each other's side. He doesn't care if you both didn't agree it was a date or something, he knows you love him so that makes this a date. Obviously.

Penny Lamb:

You know how most people tend to make friends with those similar to them? Be it that they have the same habits as you, they act the same way as you, they dress the same way, or anything else, people make friends by those they can find a connection with.

And that theory was exactly the one Ezra Lamb had thought of when he made up his mind on introducing you to his sister, Penny.

For some context, you had met Ezra on one of your late night strolls through the park. It definitely wasn't a ceremonious meeting as you quickly learned the reason he was there was because he was selling medication to some college kids, but for some reason you both felt compelled to talk to each other. He seemed to be very well versed when dealing with your anxiety as you learned the more times you both bumped into each other. Apparently it's because, as he mentions to you when you ask him about it, his sister dealt with the same thing.

Well, one thing led to another and you two became friends despite your very different personalities. Ezra, of course, eventually wanted to introduce you to his sister. To him, you were both quite similar in that you were the same age, you were both girls, and you both had crippiling anxiety. And going back to his theory from earlier, it just made sense to him that you both would be good friends.

That's what led you to where you were now, in Penny and Ezra's shared bedroom with you in Penny awkwardly shaking hands as Ezra introduces you to each other before leaving the room so you both can "get to know each other."

Yeah, you both didn't do anything of the sort, in fact, you both didn't speak a single word to each other the whole time you were there. It was a lot more awkward than you expected and without having Ezra there to mediate or anything, you both were just too anxious to make a move which really sucks, because Penny's heard a lot about you from Ezra and she really wanted this to work out...

But alas, it didn't and you went home about an hour or two later without a friend gained. You kind of just assumed that would be the end of your interactions, maybe you'd see each other once in a blue moon, considering Uranium isn't all that big and you both went to the same school together, but that was all you really anticipated to happen.

Of course, at that moment you didn't realize how pushy Ezra can be when he's made up his mind about something. See he heard from Penny that you two didn't end up talking much..., or rather at all, which didn't surprise him very much, but he had already made up his mind that your friendship was going to happen, and he doesn't change his mind that easily.

Cue Ezra basically coaching Penny through a conversation with you, plus the added benefit of you joining the choir, and that's how you got Penny nervously coming up to you after one choir practice and just lore dumping on you about lions. Normally, Penny would have never agreed to this, but as stated before, Ezra was pushy and Penny did think you both could be good friends... So she stepped out of her comfort zone to talk to you.

It was pretty confusing for you since she didn't seem all that talkative when you first met her, not to mention you had no clue Ezra was that keen on you guys getting along, but after about the third or fourth time she's done it, you got used to it and eventually got comfortable around her enough to add in a few words of your own which she was ecstatic about.

You both ended up realizing how similar you were and it was really nice to have someone you could connect with about anxiety and how much it affects your life. You kind of wish you met her sooner actually, she understands how you tick a lot more than the rest of the choir can and that's extremely helpful when your anxiety starts getting to the point where you like, can't breathe, or you feel like you're on the verge of a panic attack.

Ezra was right, it's good to have a friend who just gets you like Penny does.

Penny is really good at helping you manage your anxiety, but hers... not so much. For whatever reason, she just cannot handle it by herself and she always ends up trying to convince herself that she's fine, even when she's not... Please help her through it because she's not gonna be able to do it herself-

Penny loves to gift you random trinkets and doodads, meaning you will have a lot of random rocks and small knickknacks she finds from the forest and garage sales, respectively.

Whenever you guys text, Penny either writes some of the most formal text messages you'll ever receive or utter nonsense that requires a Sherlock Holmes to decipher, it all really depends on her mood.

Penny will be subtly trying to get you into Johnny Moon (she isn't subtle at all), and it's like, even if you aren't a fan, you have to respect the effort.

As you guys grow as friends, Penny just gets such strong feelings of wanting to protect you even if she doesn't know from what... She just knows that if anyone puts their hands on you, they are gonna be way more than sorry.

A habit you've gained from hanging out with Penny so much is that sometimes when there are awkward silences between you and someone else, you'll just info dump like her to fill the space. You didn't even notice you started doing it until you did it around Penny and she pointed it out to you-

Penny knows like, every breathing exercise in the book, and it honestly is her favorite trick in helping her calm down since it forces her to focus on her breathing rather than whatever is making her anxious. She'll definitely teach you all of them as well if you want, though with you, she kind of prefers taking you somewhere secluded to calm you down there so it's just you two instead of you two and a ton of other people.

Please let her ramble about why she thinks certain characters have anxiety or why certain characters are really bad representations of people with anxiety, she needs to get it off her chest and you're the only one who'll understand! :(

Penny waited for a minute before introducing you to her one other friend, Tammy, since she knows Tammy can be kind of a lot sometimes... When you guys do meet and you get to know each other better, trust that Tammy adores you!

So, it's embarrassing for Penny to talk about since she has a bit of a bad track record when it comes to her crushes, but for a while now, Penny has been feeling a certain way about you. She wouldn't exactly call it love yet, but she can't help but smile so brightly whenever you are near her and her hands get all sweaty when you are holding them..., it may not be love yet, but she wholeheartedly loves having you with her.

...

It wasn't love yet, but it sure is love now.

Penny's love for you really started during a sleepover you two were having. It was really late at night, about 2 AM, and Penny could tell you were about to pass out from the way your eyes could barely manage to stay open as you watched the movie currently playing on her television.

You two were already sitting side-by-side and holding hands, but that's not what made Penny's heart start skipping beats, no, it was when, not only a few minutes later, your head hit her shoulder and started to nuzzle into her neck. She knows you were only doing it because you were about to fall asleep, but that made her so incredibly flustered that she went still for a good 30 minutes, trying not to breathe too hard that you would move away.

Having you be so comfortable around her that you would get so touchy just made her fall hard from the brink she was once on..., she can't believe she's saying it, but she loves you.

The first thing Penny does when she finds out that she likes you is to increase the amount of gifts she gives you by tenfold, she finds it's one of the only ways she can show her interest in you without exploding on the spot.

If you ever want to, she would be more than happy to have you hold her face while you do her makeup. :)

Penny isn't the greatest when dealing with bullies, but she'll try a lot harder for you! She always makes sure to ask you before she does anything though since she doesn't want to cross your boundaries or anything.

She somehow convinced you to let her kiss you on the forehead or cheek every once in a while. She will always say it's platonic, but she does not mean that one bit-

Penny practically makes you stay over at her house every night and if you can't, then believe me when I say that she'll be getting into your house one way or another. (She probably somehow has keys to your house or she gets through your window in the least elegant fashion possible.)

She loves you so much that she can't even describe it in words, which she has tried as evidenced by all the letters under her bed. It's so difficult to describe how her bones feel like they are crumpling every time you look at her or how her body feels like it's gonna cave in on itself with every little touch... Seriously, you make her so sick and she cannot get enough of it. It would be impossible for her to let you go.

She isn't really the type to get jealous, but having to share you with the rest of the choir, because they all might kill each other if they don't, is extremely hard for her as she just wants to keep you all to herself.

She wonders if you like her room enough to want to stay there for a while...

Constance Blackwood:

You don't think you have ever walked so fast in your life as you did today...

Bullies aren't anything new to you, being the anxious person you are, you've dealt with your fair share of awful people before. But in the past, at least you had somewhere to run away to, a sanctuary where no one could mock you or get to you. However, you moved. Now you are in Uranium with a whole new group of bullies and no place to run off to.

Hearing their insults and mocking tones from behind you, your pace kept growing as you held onto your backpack straps tightly. You had no idea where you were going at this point, all you wanted was to be away from them. You had been at this for a while now, and you were so over it..., you didn't want to potentially lead them to your house, so where were you to go?

Finally lifting your head off the ground, eyes scanning the area around you, your eyes get caught on a small cafe down the block labeled, "Blackwood Cafe." With no other place to go and the cafe seemingly like your best option at the moment, you hurriedly dashed over and went inside. Closing the door behind you as you catch your breath, you glance over the cozy cafe you're now in, silently admiring the cute pastel colors and warm interior.

Thankfully, there were a few people already in there, you just know it would be incredibly awkward if you were the only one, and you had also luckily had some cash on you, giving you a reason to stay here while your bullies hopefully left you alone. You went up to the counter, ordered, and got seated, but even if you were safe in here and able to just breathe for a second, you actually had no idea if your bullies would leave you alone when you inevitably have to leave... What if they just waited till you walked out to jump you? What if they come inside and no one stops them from dragging you out??

God, you hated your anxiety... You can feel your heart pounding and your hands shaking even if nothing was happening, you could only hope no one would notice.

And no one did! ...Except for one girl, Constance Blackwood.

Constance had always been one to observe the cafe's patrons while they enjoyed their treats, it's a habit she picks up from her dad who is always looking to make sure their customers were having a good time. So, it should come as no surprise that she would notice and observe you too. Except instead of seeing a content face or a calm demeanor, she saw your anxiety-ridden one, one that immediately made her frown with concern.

She knows she has no right stepping into a stranger's business, but you aren't really a stranger to her. She can see your slightly disheveled St. Cassian uniform and she recognizes you from the choir so... doesn't that give her a bit of a reason to ask what's wrong? Constance quickly grabs a muffin and tells her parents she's gonna go on a quick break before walking over to your booth in the corner, much to your confusion. "Uhm, hey! I don't know if you remember, but I'm Constance Blackwood, we met in choir the other day. I just wanted to come over and ask if you were okay since you seem a little..., uh, down?"

Little did Constance know though that those few simple words would change things forever.

You tried your best to fend her off at the start, shakily explaining that you're fine and there was nothing to worry about, but her warm and caring words made it hard to keep pretending everything was fine... So, even if you still weren't sure about it, you decided to tell her what was wrong. You both ended up talking for hours, even past closing, as Constance comforted you and you ended up moving on to other topics to lighten up. Even if it was a surprising encounter to say the least, you're really glad Constance came over and asked if you were okay, it was nice to know someone cared...

Once it started getting late, she took you home just in case your bullies were still there, which they thankfully weren't, and you both parted ways for the night.

For the night.

Of course the bullying didn't magically stop after that, so you found yourself at the Blackwood Cafe more and more often. Eventually it even became an everyday thing. You truly did feel bad about this at the start since you didn't want to be a bother, but Constance always reassured you that you weren't and she enjoyed your company. She means that too, you are a lot easier to talk with compared to Ocean or Penny, and she finds herself always having a smile when she thinks of your conversations later that night.

Really, it wasn't surprising at all that you two would become friends with how often you spent time together, and Constance couldn't be happier about it. Even if the people in Uranium were awful, she was happy she could be friends with someone who wasn't. :)

Constance may not know every trick when dealing with anxiety, but she's a very good listener and will let you ramble as much as you need while being so incredibly supportive.

It doesn't matter how long you've been friends for, Constance quite literally trusts you with her life.

Sometimes when she is feeling a little silly, she'll invite you to her house in the middle of the night to do some late night baking. It's basically her therapy and why not share it with her new favorite person?

Her little brother is obsessed with you and Constance has zero clue why- Like, anytime you're over, he'll try to monopolize all your time and he is always asking about you. Constance doesn't know if she should be jealous of you or of him.

Constance tends to people watch, but she doesn't just watch anyone, she likes to watch you in particular... a lot.

Like, anytime you are around, a lot.

She also talks about you a ton, leading her parents or her friends to have to shut her up so she'll talk about something different- She's glad they do to, because's she sure she can talk about you for hours and she's not sure how deep and dark her thoughts on you can go...

She loves having you try on her glasses, she thinks it's so cute.

If Constance is ever the one feeling anxious, you'll likely be the first person she goes to in order to calm down. This is mainly because she knows you know how to deal with it but also because she finds your presence calming.

You're also welcome to do the same with her! It could quite literally be the dead of night, but if you need her, she'll be there for you.

They might be a little outdated, but Constance likes to make mixtapes for you with a bunch of songs that either remind her of you or songs she thinks you'll like. She might put a few ABBA songs in there too for good measure. :)

Falling in love (She noticed Ocean stealing you away from her and she got super jealous, where she soon realized her feelings.)

Constance gets that you are a busy person and that you can't be near her all the time, she really does, she understands that you have other friends to tend to that aren't just her.

So why is it that she feels so gross watching people like Ocean and Ricky steal you away from her? Why is it that she feels such an overwhelming urge to scream as Noel fixes your hair, or when Penny holds your hand, or when Mischa is constantly stealing your attention from her?? What is it that makes her so... so..., jealous?

She has no idea, she really doesn't. These are both of your friends she's talking about, she has no reason to be jealous of them! They all just want the best for you and you deserve to be loved and cared for. Yet, it's like she's walking on Legos every time you aren't paying attention to her.

These were the thoughts that plagued Constance's mind for days on end, even months. She wasn't sure why she was feeling this way, but god did she hate it. It was easy to see something was bothering her as well with how she would go straight into her room after school and pace around anxiously, her mind filled with thoughts no one can see. And truthfully, her parents were starting to get worried... This wasn't like their wonderful girl at all and they hated seeing her so conflicted.

So, being the one pair of decent parents in Uranium, they stop her on her way to her room one day and ask what's wrong. Constance was extremely reluctant to talk about it at first because, what do two adults who've been around much longer than she has know about jealousy? But they were pushy and she relented, telling them everything about the jealous and how she likes having your attention on her, getting it all out.

The laughing they did after that made Constance beyond frustrated-

Through tears in their eyes and the laughs, they had to explain what she was experiencing was likely a crush. That made everything click for Constance, who couldn't help stare at her floor in embarrassment and realization...

She loves you...

"Oh..."

Constance gets lowkey kind of nervous when she's around you now since she doesn't want her crush to be too obvious..., eventually the anxiety will melt and she can be herself around you, but for the first few minutes every time she sees you, she just feels so awkward.

She will be making sure you are well hydrated and fed, and you are gonna like it! She loves you too much to watch you waste away!!

Please let her have movie nights with you, she wants to watch all of your favorite movies and have you ramble about them to her. :'(

She loves squishing your cheeks.

She may or may not be stalking your social media so she can know what you are up to all the time....

Constance doesn't know if she should be grateful or not that her parents pointed out that she likes you because now her jealousy has basically tripled and it's only getting worse by the second. She wholeheartedly wants to just punt people whenever they interrupt her time with you.

You have bullies? Well not anymore, she is not letting anyone be disrespectful to you in or out of her presence. She always somehow finds out if someone is spouting nasty things about you and she will be doing something about it.

A/N: I'm struggling guys, I have no clue why it takes me so long to finish requests, but I swear I'm working on them! :'(

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lawnmowereater · 1 year ago

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Can you do mischa x short reader headcanons??

ive found my people

he definitely leans on you. he rests his elbow on your head as he talks to other people, or if hes just scrolling on his phone

if you can't reach things, you better assume it's because he put things there. he likes it when you need him to reach stuff. for your birthday one of the gifts he got you was a step stool

one of his favorite things is seeing his clothes on you. you wearing his hoodies or boxers even makes him go feral. hes never had much, so he loves that you're his, and his alone.

he tries to get you clothes but over estimates just how small you are. he ends up getting clothes five times too small for you. plus, he can't figure out the american clothing sizes for the life of him

going off of that, you always have to shop with him. if you don't, he'd pick the most crazy wish dot com outfits that are probably too big. he loves it though. especially when he gets to pick out clothes for you (he always picks the most revealing clothes)

when cuddling, you're almost always laying on his chest. you help ground him, and he always sleeps so much better when you're around.

sometimes if you're walking too slow, he'll just pick you up. like i swear to god he'll just grab you and throw you over his shoulder. especially when you're in school. its incredibly embarrassing, but he couldn't care less. you have classes to get to, and your little legs couldn't get there fast enough.

he'll tease you about your height, but he'll do it in Ukrainian so you have no clue. you'll think he's calling you sweet names but he's really just saying "shortie" or "short stack". he'll never tell you though

please request more mischa this was so fun 😭

#fanfiction #rtc #ride the cyclone #mischa bachinski #mischa bachinski x reader #mischa rtc #mischa ride the cyclone

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theangelcatalogue · 11 months ago

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❝ If you don't shut your mouth, I'ma shut it for you! ❞ ― YANDERE MISCHA BACHINSKI HEADCANONS

→ RIDE THE CYCLONE

→ ROMANTIC

→ GENDER NEUTRAL

→ TW: MURDER, PROTECTIVE BEHAVIOR, THREAT, POSSESSIVE BEHAVIOR, OBSESSIVE BEHAVIOR, CLINGY BEHAVIOR, TOXIC BEHAVIOR, DELUSIONAL BEHAVIOR, KIDNAPPING/KIDNAP MENTION, BULLYING/BULLYING MENTIONS, FIGHTS/FIGHTING MENTION, BLOOD, VIOLENCE/VIOLENCE MENTIONS, SENSITIVE TOPICS, BAD GRAMMAR, BAD ENGLISH AND MADE BY A MINOR! IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE, FEEL FREE TO LEAVE! PLEASE TELL IF I FORGOT SOMETHING AND ENJOY(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧ !

───── ❝ NON-CYCLONE/ALIVE AU ❞ ─────

❝ Hit ya (hit ya) with the (with the) punk (punk) tactics! ❞

★ → Mischa Bachinski, the angriest boy in town, that's a damn of reputation, i mean, he has his motives right? His mom died of uranium exposition, just to be adopted by a couple in Uranium, and also have a shit home life in his adoptive house! This is how he became the angriest boy in town!

★ → But a thing is, when he falls, he falls hard, like, really.

★ → You are probably part of the choir too, and the fact a person didn't care about the rumors or his reputation, you just talked with him, so yeah, after meeting you and when he started to interact with you more, he fell for you! (Really and hard.)

★ → If you ever find a love letter or lyrics in your locker, it was him! Of course, he doesn't sign, he will leave them anonymous, and when you tell him about the letters, how you never excepted to have a secret admirer or something like that, you say that they are really pretty and well written, he is happy internally!

★ → He's very obsessive, thinks and talks about you 24/7, he even has some photos of you in his phone (Some of the photos he may or may not been taken some without you knowing)...

★ → He's also very protective of you, are you being bullied? The next day, the bully is too scared to even look at you, a guy is making you uncomfortable? The guy is beaten up, anyone who does any bad to you are screwed! You are the only one that calms him down.

★ → He has some nicknames for you, maybe some variation of your name, but some of them are in Ukrainian, you don't understand them and just hopes they aren't something offensive (They aren't, he would never say anything bad about you)

- Моя любов (Moya lyubov) - My love - Дорогий( Dorohyy) - My dear - Мій божественний (Miy bozhestvennyy) - My divine

(I used Google in this part! Please tell me if i got something wrong!)

★ → As i said, anyone who does any bad to you are screwed, right? But what do i mean by that? Well, Mischa won't let it slide, threats, violence, even murder? He will use it! He has to protect you, he won't let anyone hurt you, mentally, emotionally or physically, Mischa will make sure you are safe, of course if he murders anyone, he won't let people know, he isn't dumb (YOU HEARD IT RTC FANDOM??)

★ → His thoughts can be delusional sometimes, he already at some point thought of you two wedding, his dream is to have a traditional wedding in Ukraine, he wants you both to visit his hometown, it would be amazing. (He already made his vows. Just warning you.)

★ → Now you ask me, how is he going to confess? Well, probably going to tell you face to face, he means every word he says, he has a way with the words. (Please, we all know that, i mean, you listened to Talia??)

★ → After you two started dating, he is 10 times worst!! Really...like, really.

★ → He is more protective, more obssesive, more jealous, he sends you more messages that he sends you before, if this is possible, because he texts you 24/7.

★ → He already made threats to anyone that thought of confess to you, if he discovers, did he already killed them? Possibly...

★ → If you ever discover any of this and confront him, he would be confused! He did this for you, he loves you! Can't you see, he has a reason! That reason is you!

★ → It could come to a point where he would lock you in the basement with him, he would do this when his adoptive parents aren't home, they don't check the basement no matter what, he would take good care of you.

★ → He would never hurt you. But he would do anything to keep you with him, he would do anything.

★ → Anything.

★- HIT YA WITH THE PUNK TACTICS!

★ HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MISCHA!! :D

★ FIRST RTC HEADCANON LET'S GOOOO

★ The brainrot is real guys.

★ HOW ARE U GUYS?? I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THIS!! :3

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seraphicloves · 10 months ago

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imagine mischa falling in love with a canadian (noel, reader insert, literally anybody u want that's canadian) like he would despise them simply bc he loves them. canada is the place that killed his mother, he doesn't want there to be anything good about it. i think like he would feel almost as if he was betraying his mother by falling for somebody from there yk?

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mischa-and-leos-wife · 1 year ago

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yoo i love ur mischa headcannons. can i ask for some more plz :3 more specifically if u want like a mischa x anxious reader?

ofc i can!! ok warning but even though i have a diagnosed anxiety disorder, i suck at writing characters with anxiety so if you have anything to make this more accurate, please let me know!

i feel like if you started getting really anxious at like a party or something he’d like take you outside or in a separate room and just hold you and stuff

if you didn’t want to go and do/ask something by yourself he’d definitely go with you or just do it for you

hes either the worst or the BESTTTT

he’ll just hug you and like kiss your forehead while you talk about whatever it is that’s on your mind

or if you don’t want to talk, he will just yap and yap and yap lmao

he knows what sort of things you want to avoid bc they make you anxious, so he’d never even think of pushing you to do them

he’d probably play his music to “help you” 😭🙏

like you could be literally shaking and can barely speak and he’d just be like “don’t worry! i have the perfect thing!” and it’s just overly auto-tuned bad hip hop that he made in his adoptive parents basement

he loves you so much and would do absolutely anything to help you or make you smile

he’d probably start making really bad jokes just so he could make you laugh

if you start getting anxious while you’re out somewhere, he’d squeeze your hand and take you to a more private area (if there is one) and just try to say comforting things to you

he found out that really sour candy can help people from spiraling when anxious, so he always has some on hand if you want it

ok that’s it for now! let me know if you have any more requests! ♡︎

#mischa x reader #gus halper #fanfic #rtc mischa #mischa bachinski #rtc #ride the cyclone #x reader #rtc musical

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ch2rub · 11 months ago

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~ Who are you? ~ A Mischa x Reader fic

Ch-4/1

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Posted onto all platforms- July 24, 2024

You open your eyes to be met with darkness. Only a bit of the moonlight being let into your room from a small window. You look towards you alarm clock to see it says 3:00 am. As you sit up drowsily with you school uniform sticking to your skin with sweat, you sit to think.

'never should've taken that nap.'

you sat there feeling disgusting and not at all refreshed. Like you didn't just wake up from a long nap. You rub your eyes to get rid of some of the crust as you realize some problems.

1. you smell horrible.

2. You have so much homework you weren't able to get done.

3. There is something up with this town.

You start on the first problem. opting to get up and walk towards the bathroom upstairs to take a shower. Trying to be a quiet as you can but of course everything is ten times louder than it normally would be. With each step the stairs let out a loud creek. You tried your best to shuffle on the floor boards to minimise the amount of sound your making but it did nothing to dampen each groan the wood made. After having to travel through the dark halls of your new house, almost getting lost in the large home you were able to arrive in the bathroom. Letting out a sigh as you got ready to clean yourself. You strip and turned on the shower to let it heat up. After a minute the shower was at your perfect temperature so you stepped inside.

Feeling you body relax as you let the warm water cascade down your back. You stand in the shower for a second, letting your brain process everything that has happened so far. After moving to uranium everything seemed to have happened so fast you couldn't get a moment to relax and think. It was only wednesday and yet so much has happened since you arrived on sunday. As you stood there you thought back onto the previous days and everything that had happened. As far as you know this town makes feels a little off. Not only was it those two girls you met yesterday but the constant feeling that you are being watched. Last night you immediately assumed you had a stalker but after some thinking, this is a really small town. Nothing that interesting would be happening here. Especially to you. Nothing ever happens to you that's odd. Except for what you saw earlier in your moms studio.

You shudder as you think back on it. You tried to forget it but it stays in your mind. You decide to think about it later as you continued your shower. Once you were done you turned of the showerhead and stepped out of the shower. Wrapping a warm towel around you and grabbing your dirty uniform. You quickly made you way through the dark hallways down into your room. You quickly change into a large t shirt and some shorts. You sit down on your bed and decide to do the homework you didn't do earlier in the day. Grabbing your bag you pull out notebooks and pencils getting to work.

.........

After 10 minutes or so you've finished all of the work. 'fucking hate math' You set your pencil down and stuff everything into your bag. A quick glance to the clock next to your bed lead you to the decision that you should get to sleep. Hoping you wont feel like shit for being up so late, you let yourself fall onto your pillow. Trying to close your eyes and rest but of course it's not that easy. You shuffle around a little bit trying to get comfortable under your blankets but nothing helps. You curl up into yourself under your covers trying to fall asleep and not let your thoughts eat at you. Knowing yourself you knew the longer you stayed awake the more you'll think about the stuff you continue to try and avoid. The feelings and experiences you wished would just disappear. Some recent some older.

You finally start dozing off after many, many minutes. Before you know it you wake up again but not in the same place you fell asleep. Well it is the same place but it looks different. It looks like how it was when you moved in. Except more lived in. You sat up confused looking around. You noticed a teen in your room. Pacing back and forth in front of the bed, Mumbling something under his breath.

The boy ran his fingers through his dark raven hair. He has olive skin and kissable lips. His brows furrowed as he continues to stress out about something you have no clue about. You continue to stare at him. Sort of locked in a trance. Admiring the way his lips move and the way his fingers comb through his soft hair. You continue to look him up and down. Looking at his dark brown eyes and the way they shift around the room. He stops his pacing and slumps down onto the floor. Sitting against the wall and pulling his knees up to his chest. Resting his head onto his legs and interlocking his hands around his knees. This sudden movement knocks you out of the trance you where in as you start to panic.

"Hello?!" You shout. Hoping to find some answers as to who he is, what happened to the room you were occupying, and why he was in that said room. Your shout landed onto deaf ears as the boy continues to sit against the wall. You slowly get up from the bed and walk towards him. Taking a deep breath as you try and tap him. Trying to get his attention. This leads to your hand going through his arm as if you were a hologram. You gasp and back up from the boy. Starting to freak yourself out, you sit down next to him. Having no clue what to do. As you sit there the sound of sniffing got you attention. You turn your head towards the boy next to you. You see his shoulder shaking and quiet sobs coming from the boy. You feel empathy and wish you could comfort the stranger but after your first failed attempt you don't try to touch him again. Not wanting to make yourself panic more.

You look around the room to see it emptier than it was when you first moved in. You notice no posters adorning the walls, or some of the little things that were put in there that gave it character. It looked more empty that it did when you first arrived. You look back to the boy next to you. His figure dwarfing you although both of you were sat. You tilt your head slightly as you try and make out the words silently coming for his lips. The harder you tried to listen and figure out what he was saying the less sense it made. The words sounded like gibberish. Like he was speaking different language. You didn't know what language it was but it sure as hell wasn't english. He looked up and wiped his eyes. The sight of his red puffy eyes and red nose caused your heart to squeeze. Seeing him in this state saddened you more than you thought it would. Of course you felt empathy for the crying boy. You wouldn't be human if you didn't, but you felt bad for him in a different way. Almost like seeing you life long friend break apart. The only difference being is that you didn't know this boy. He was a stranger. Seeing his beautiful eyes water as tears threatened to continue spill made you want to reach out and hug him. To hold him tight and comb your finger through his soft hair. To whisper into his ear and tell him everything would be ok.

"Fucking pathetic" He mutters. Standing up from the ground and wiping his eyes one last time. This snapped you out of your thoughts as you took notice to his heavy accent. He grabbed a small ipod from the nightstand next to the mattress and plugged the headphones into his ears. Closing his eyes and resting his head against the wall as he sat down onto the makeshift bed. Breathing in and out a couple of times. While this happens all you can think about is his accent as you continue to stare at him. Caught up in the same trance you were in earlier. You wish you can hear him speak again. Finding to adore his heavy accent right away.

You eyes quickly snap open after an alarm blared into you ear. Rolling onto your side with a groan you slap you alarm clock to turn it off.

7:00 AM

With a sigh you turn back onto you back. The boy was a dream. You kinda wish it wasn't. Thinking about his ebony locks and thick accent. Omg do you long to hear him speak again. To have him whisper into you ear while he held you close to himself. He was the boy of you dreams. Key word being dreams as he does not exist and never will. He was just some kid in you dream. There's no reason to continue to think about him.

You shake you head, trying to get rid of your thoughts as if you were an etch-a-sketch. You sit up and stretch your arms above you hea, hearing the joints pop. You lazily get out of the bed and walk up the stairs to get ready for the day. You walk into the bathroom and do your business. Brushing your teeth, washing your face, and using the restroom. You walk down into your room and get dressed into your uniform. You head back up the stairs into the kitchen to have some breakfast. Expecting to see you mother in the kitchen it caught you off guard when she was nowhere to be seen. Your first thought was that she just slept in late but you know your mother. You know she never sleeps in.

You look up to the door of her room to see it shut. You quickly look outside and still see her car parked in the driveway so you decide to go with the option that it was a one off day, and she did sleep in late. Everything was fine. You tried to convince yourself that but you knew it wasn't true. Whatever was going on here was not right. You start making yourself a bowl of cereal so you don't end up being late. You quickly poor some milk into the bowl after pouring your favorite cereal. You grab a spoon and start eating. After a couple of minutes you place the dirty dishes into the sink and walk towards the door. Grabbing you skateboard that was resting to the side of the door and opening it. You walk down your driveway and take a running start before you lay down the board and hop onto it. The running start giving you some momentum to start riding straight away.

.........

You arrive at your school. Yay :/

You get to your homeroom, not stopping at your locker because you opted to bringing your bag with you everywhere. You sat down at the desk you claimed as your own and looked around the room once or twice. Hoping to see Penny's face again, as usual. Or maybe even the two new girls you met. Ocean and Constance. Were they a little weird. Yeah, but you need to make new friends. As expected you didn't see the three girls but that wasn't what was bothering you. As much as you didnt want to admit it that boy you saw in your dream was still on your mind. A little of you hoping that he would be in your class. Although you knew how unlikely it was and that this was just some random guy your brain created, there was still a little part of you hoping that one day you would meet him. Maybe even just admire him from afar.

You took a deep breath. Closing your eyes and laying your head against your desk. You had about 20 mins of free time in homeroom. Not having any work to do, or any friends to talk to. You sat there with your head against your desk and your eyes close. Imagining how life would be like if it was perfect. If you never left the city to this small town. If you were with the boy from your dreams. If you .... if you met your father.

The loud ring of the bell took you out of your last thought. Making you get up from your desk, slinging your bag onto your shoulder and trudging off to you next class. The rest of the day went on like this. Going to class sitting down, and taking the required notes. While you arm moved over the paper to write down the info, you weren't really absorbing the information. Barley even paying attention. Your head still being in the clouds. At the beginning of first period you decided the thought of your Father wasn't worth it. There was a reason he left. There was a reason why you never met him. That unknown reason must've been enough that your mother would cringe at his name. Why he was never brought up in conversations.

You decided to leave it at that. You father wasn't worth the thought and that was that. You never knew why your father left but you never pried. Knowing how much it hurt you mother. If it pained her that much to think about it than you would never ask. Not wanting to put your mother through the tremendous amount of emotional pain that it caused her. There was this one time you asked about your father. You remember like it was yesterday. When you were little you always hoped that your father would come back. You never met him and seeing all of your friends have healthy relationships with their fathers hurt your little heart. You didn't understand why your father left, or even the fact that he abandoned you both. You thought that he left for a trip but was gonna come back. You felt satisfied leaving it at that. Making sense for you childish brain. That was until you turned seven. Finally becoming a big kid in you brain you thought you deserved to know.

Before you would alway be left in the dust. Being told that you were to young to know, and that you would understand when you were older. They were right about that. You younger self didn't get it. With that when you and your mother were setting up chairs for your birthday you assigned a seat for each person. Having yourself sit at the head of the table because it was your birthday. You left the two seats next to you empty. The right one being where you mother would sit, and the left your father. Your mother asked why you were leaving the left one empty. You told her it was for you dad when he would come back with you birthday present. A birthday present for all of the birthdays he missed. That's what you told your mother. You were convinced he would come back on your birthday. each year imagining him with a present bigger than the last. That's what you younger brain always tried to tell yourself. That that's why you wanted him there. Other than that you were fine with your mother.

Now you understand that that wasn't the truth. You know you longed for a father figure. For someone to take care of you the way your friends fathers would take care of them. Of course you still had your mother but that was different. It's different between a way a mother parents compared to a father. Without both you felt like you were missing out. Like there was a part of you heart that was missing. Now you know it will forever be missing. You had to learn that truth on that fateful day. Seeing you mothers smile falter and eyes slightly water. In her mind she new he was never gonna come back. Seeing you with that large toothy grin. Eyes sparkling with hope. Seeing her expresion told you the truth. You were young but you were smart. You were able to notice her smile falter and eyes slightly water. Seeing that told you all you needed to know. Hearing her response further deepen the blade. The fact that he wasn't coming back and never will.

"BRRRRRIIIIINNNNNGGGGG"

You were taken from your thoughts by the bell for the second time that day. This time you were grateful for it. Knowing that if nothing took you from the thought of you father you would forever sit there. Thinking about that painful thought forever. Grabbing your bag you start walking towards the choir room. It was lunchtime and you finally gave up on looking for Penny. You already knew at this point that she wasn't going to be in the lunch room so why try. A small part of you wanted to go to the lunch room to try and look for those dark caramel brown eyes. To see those beautiful features again. Your brain stopped your heart from looking for you dream boy. Anyone would be able to tell that he would only be a dream. Only being able to see him while you daydream.

You walk down the same eerie hall that lead to the choir room. Feeling the same anxiety you felt everytime you walk down this hall. Why do you feel this way, you had no qlue. Maybe it was the way the air always seemed colder down this hall. The breeze causing you to shiver. Maybe it was the way there seemed to be no lights down the hall. Giving the hall a creepy darkness to it. The only light source being a window. A window that birds seemed to love throwing themselves at as another crow flew into it. You jumped from the unexpected thump from the bird forcefully hitting the glass. You look towards the window to be met with the gruesome sight of two dead birds. One you remember being a day older, as yesterday a crow threw itself full force at the window.

You turn back to face forward. Being freaked out at the fact that two day in a row a crow flew into the same window you quickly walked to the choir room. Not full on sprinting but quicker than a normal walk. You open the choir room down and quickly closed it behind yourself. You slightly caught off guard by a new item being in the room. Among the usual dusty boxes, your met with a canvas being propped on on of the boxes. You walk closer to it recognizing the figure painted onto the canvas. It's the same painting that you saw in your mother's studio.

The figure of a girl in a saint cassian uniform without a head being painted onto the canvas with shaky and disheveled lines. You can tell that each shake in the lines where the same as the painting from you home. This was the same painting that you mother made. How did it get to you school you had no idea. You didn't think about it for long as a chill went along your spine as you started to see it move again. It moved its arms up showing a porcelain doll. The doll had curly hair and pitch black holes for eyes. The girl let go of the doll. Letting it drop with an ear piercing crack. The doll somehow managed to make it out of the painting. Dropping onto the ground in front of you. The porcelain head cracking off of it neck. Slowly rolling to your feet.

Your eyes grew wide staring at the head, slightly kicking it with you foot. Making it roll and have the face face you. The dark beady eyes staring at you. You quickly turn your head at the painting. Seeing the girl move again she reached her hands out. Grabbing the edges of the painting. You watch as the headless girl try and pull herself out of the painting. Her finger being fully in your reality. You were able to see her ghostly white skin being stained with a sicking red. Presumably blood from her wounds.

"Watcha doing?" You feel an ice cold hand be place onto you shoulder. You quickly turn around to be met with a familiar face. You quickly turn back to the painting to see it gone completely as if it was never there. The only thing being proof of its existence being the broken doll laying at your feet.

Making this two parts cuz this chapter is long. Sorry

#ghosts #mischa bachinski #mischa ride the cyclone #mischa rtc #mischa x reader #rtc #rtc musical #strangers to lovers #supernatural #talking to ghosts #jane doe rtc #rtc fanfic #ride the cyclone

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