#Mike I’m so sorry if I offend you please forgive me

[fanmoose12]

If you still take prompts, could you maybe write some more coffee shop/ teashop Levihan? Maybe them having normal nice lives while meeting there with friends, celebrating anniversary, maybe Levi proposing to Hange but she had a very bad day and nothing goes as planned...? Sorry to bother you I just love reading the fluff you create, it gives me so much joy...

It was his third attempt. Third. If that one fails, Levi would jump off a cliff. And take Erwin with him since previous two attempts were based off his advice.

Levi was a man enough to admit, his first failed attempt - a confession hidden inside a fortune cookie - was his own fault. He knew Hange never read those.

But his second failed attempt - oh, that was entirely on Erwin.

"No one can resist a good cupcake," he had said. His voice, as always, was full of passion and conviction, making Levi doubt if they really were talking about simple cookies, or Erwin was trying to entice him into joining another one of his political causes. "A cupcake with a clear enough message will surely convince Hange that your feelings are true."

A cupcake with a message? Convince Hange? Now, Levi definitely wasn't sure if they were talking about his pathetic love life or Erwin's next political agenda.

He hoped Erwin wouldn't request him to make cupcakes with provocative slogans on them. His cafe had a small clientele as it was, no point in alienating people even further.

But weirdo or not, Erwin was still slightly more experienced in that area than Levi himself was, and, unlike Mike, could keep his mouth shut around Hange, so... Unfortunately, he was Levi's only hope.

He listened to him and he made that damn cupcake for Hange, spending several nights at the bakery to make sure that it was absolutely perfect. The "I love you" written with cream on top of it made Levi embarrassed beyond compare, but, unfortunately, that was really how he felt. And he was tired of hiding it.

The cupcake was perfect, the note was adequate, the only thing left was to present it to Hange, live through mortification of having his personal feelings acknowledged and then receive that sweet, sweet kiss.

But Levi forgot one simple detail. It was February the 14th.

The damned St. Valentine's Day.

Hange didn't even bat an eye, as he put the cupcake in front of her. She simply thanked him for the coffee and then got back to her work.

Levi was ready to jump off the cliff right there and then.

Unfortunately, Nanaba had intercepted him before he went to find the tallest bridge in their city. She calmed him down, made him tea and encouraged to try again.

It was the last time, Levi decided. If his plan failed, then the cliff was waiting for him.

This one wasn't perfect too, but latte with a heart drawn on it, served to Hange long after St. Valentine's Day was bound to get the message across, right?

Besides, it required minimum amount of words from him, and it was the only plan he could think of that probably wouldn't make him combust on a spot as soon as his feelings were out in the open.

Should he have proceeded with Erwin's plan - the one, where he proposed to serenade Hange in the middle of his cafe - Levi would have died from mortification long before the first chorus came.

He watched a dozen of stupid youtube tutorials on making latte art, just to make sure that the heart he would draw for Hange would be the best goddamn heart anyone had ever seen.

Once his technique was mastered, Levi picked up a date - Wednesday, since he knew it was Hange's favorite day of the week. He waited for her messy mop of brown hair to appear in his cafe, and then he set his plan into motion.

He replicated the exact same stupid heart more times that he could count. Still, as he prepared latte for Hange, his hands were trembling.

As a result, the heart came out uneven and a little crooked. He wanted to redo it, but knew he had no time. It was still unmistakably a heart, and, hopefully, Hange would forgive him for not making it as perfect as she deserved.

His hands were still trembling, as he put the cup in front of Hange, next to her already opened laptop. She smiled at him gratefully, setting his own heart ablaze, but the smile quickly disappeared as she looked down at the cup.

Oh no, Levi clenched the trail in his hands tightly. He had fucked up. Erwin and his stupid observations were wrong. Hange didn't like him back.

"Um, Levi?" she tapped her finger on a table, biting her lip uncertainly.

Just do it already, four-eyes, he thought. Go ahead and break my heart. Rip it out like one would a band-aid.

"You know that I don't like latte, right?"

Goddamn it, really?

She was that oblivious? How dense such a smart person could be?

"Turn on your genius brain, four-eyes," he gritted. "And look at the damn cup."

"I see it," Hange answered, a little defensive. "It looks very pretty. Is it Armin's work?"

"No, it was mine." Levi was that close to losing it. Did Hange truly not understand his intentions? He was as clear as one could be. "I made that damn coffee, and I made that stupid heart shaped cupcake and I baked that fucking fortune cookie that you didn't even bother to read, because I'm trying to confess my feelings for you, you idiot!"

"Oh."

Hange fell silent. Why did she fall silent? Why didn't she look him in the eyes?

A second later, it hit Levi. He had confessed his feelings. No, not confessed. He shouted them at Hange.

Damn. Now he definitely didn't have a single chance with her.

"That one..." he gestured at the cup, scowling at it so fiercely as though it had personally offended him. "That one is on the house. Please, enjoy your time at our cafe..."

He turned away from Hange, wanting to get away from her as soon as possible.

However... a hand on his right wrist stopped him.

"Four-eyes?" he murmured, as he met her brown eyes.

"Sorry for not noticing all of your previous attempts," she smiled shyly, and Levi's heart started another dance in his chest. "You know I get so absentminded..."

"It's okay," Levi whispered, his eyes glued to where Hange's fingers curled around his arm. "Sorry for snapping at you."

"It's okay too," Hange echoed. "You can make it up for me, if you want, though..."

"Anything," Levi said, and he meant it. Whatever Hange wanted, he would do it.

"You can ask me on a date," her hand traveled higher, stopping at his shoulder. Hange slowly leaned in. "And you can give me a kiss..."

Well, Levi had promised it to her. Whatever Hange wanted....

[shewantedtobeasecretgirl]

The Backstage Pass (Out)

Hey everyone... this is still not an update of Do You Wanna Dance? but another pathetic attempt of me to provide you with PJ-related reading material... Sssooo, there was this post of @gardenofstoney... and I’ve always taken tags verry seriously. I felt addressed since the situation she described sounded absolutely like a perfect fanfic material so I ended up playing with the idea. One thing led to another and a Stone Gossard one-shot happened, which I hereby share with you (with her and @mookiebaelock’s consent). Disclaimer: may contain traces of Jeff Ament!

Ps. I solemnly swear I get Judy out of the shower soon.

„Are you sure you don’t want to move towards the side of the stage? These Vedder-fanatics seem pretty dangerous, I’m not sure I want to be here when they go wild…” Mel asked fidgeting with the setups of her professional camera.

“No, I’m pretty sure I’m fine here…” Maggie answered leaning her forehead against her arms that were resting on the barrier. She was dog-tired; she and her best friend, Mel were cueing the whole day to get there at the show of their favorite band, Pearl Jam. Actually, Pearl Jam was their second favorite band but it was the rock group that brought them together. They saw each other’s introduction in the “Pen Pal Wanted” column of Footsteps, the band’s fanzine and the rest was history... And finally, they were there, standing at their precious front row places, waiting for the show to begin…

They agreed on standing in front of the center of the stage since they both had different preferences… Mel was dying to make close shots of her bassist crush (and maybe steal a few smiles and glances from him), while Maggie was interested in the other side of the stage… to be more accurate, in the person who regularly ruled it. Stone Gossard. The absent-minded, aloof alien who played the rhythm guitar parts and who, unfortunately, wasn’t the most responsive member of the band. He was said to be a sarcastic, hilarious and nice guy but at shows he just… didn’t give a shit about the crowd. He was usually absorbed in the songs, following the rhythm with his entire body, marching to the beat or just bobbing his head… but that was all. No interaction, no communication, just the chords. If Maggie had been alone there, she would have picked his side and stayed there as if she had been pinned to the ground… but Mel wanted to stand near Jeff so they made a compromise. Of course, Mel tried every kind of dirty trick to lure her closer to Mike’s and Jeff’s territory and Maggie begged desperately with her irresistible sad puppy face to move in the other direction, after all, if the mountain won't come to Muhammad… and Jeff would bounce around, anyways, she argued. But neither of them could convince the other one so they were stuck in front of the place of Eddie Vedder and they knew they would have to fight hard to be able to keep their position.

“You will defend me, I know.” Maggie cuddled to her friend, letting herself be pulled in a bear hug. She was short and slim, the top of her head barely reached the level of the tall Mel’s chin, that’s why they often joked about themselves being two dogs coming from different species but being allies and best friends forever.

“I’ll defend you just… not now, oh my god, ohmygod, they’re here, that’s him!!!” Mel suddenly let her go frantically taking one picture after another of her main target.

“Okay, I can’t win against Jeff Ament…” Maggie shook her head with a forgiving smile only to discover the object of her admiration appearing on the other side of the stage, walking around with a deadpan on his face. She couldn’t help chuckling when she noticed he was wearing a black socks-dress shoes combo... with light brown shorts. She’d already got used to these weird testimonies of his terrible fashion sense but he always managed to surprise her with a newer unacceptable outfit.

When the singer finally showed up too, the crowd moved forward, pressing the girls against the barrier… and from that moment on, they only had some rest during the slower songs. Not that they wanted to complain, they were singing along the lyrics, screaming, laughing, crying or just squeezing each other’s hand making sure they were not dreaming, they were finally together, having the time of their life, really living their favorite songs. Mel was overly contented with seeing the bass player’s manly moves in the tight tank top he was wearing and the passionate solos and dazed-off moments of Mike pleased both of them too, even if they were within the spitting range of Ed. But as time went by, they both started feeling the depressing thought that this would be over soon, even if they tried to fight against it by bouncing and screaming twice as intensely as before…

When Stone started playing the opening chords of State of Love and Trust, the crowd went completely nuts and Maggie had to tighten her grip not to be drifted… the pressure behind her eased for a second but at once, she felt a sharp pain in the back of her head and lost the touch with the outside world…

***

Mhmmmm… what are these bright lights? I must have died and got in that shining corridor about which people who experienced clinical death always tell…

“Jesus, I go blind…” I mumble… or am I just hearing my own thoughts? Shit, this splitting headache, I’m definitely alive, I must have fallen asleep after taking in my migraine pill.

“Do you prefer low light?” a nasal male voice asks and as I look around, I find myself lying on a couch but I’m not in my own apartment, I don’t know this place. Oh, so I’m in a dream, nice, let’s see where it’s going…

“Yes, please!” I groan covering my eyes.

“Clouds roll by… sorry, bad joke, here, is it better his way?”

I take away my hand from my eyes and let them adjust to the pleasant half-light provided probably by a standing lamp somewhere out of my sight. When did I learn how to change the setting of my dreams? Cool… The owner of the voice takes place opposite me only to make me realize, I’m in a Stone dream, moreover, this time it’s a new one.

“Are you okay?” he’s checking me with the inquiring but still expressionless stare of a toad.

“More or less…” I mumble helplessly. Interesting, I’ve never had such a vivid dream about him, it’s somehow different, like I was in charge, I’ve never felt like this before while dreaming… Familiar melodies provide the musical accompaniment, I have to listen for a few bars until I recognize Yellow Ledbetter… but he’s here… and the music comes from…?

“Are we… at a show?” I ask suspiciously, I’m afraid that despite the realistic surrounding, it’ll turn into an incoherent screenplay written by my subconscious.

“Yes, we are…”

“But how come you’re not playing? You should be on the stage with the others…”

“I don’t feel like playing… I mean in that song, I have basically not much to do, I strum the same chords as Mike, it’s boring. At sound checks, sometimes I beg until I can play the drum parts, I’m a desperate drummer but I love it. But the rhythm guitar part is just… nah. Plus, I had to pee, anyways.”

“Fair enough.” I snicker. He’s such an awkward dork, even in my dreams. “Well, that happens if a musician is too busy with drinking beer at gigs instead of playing”.

“Excuse me?” he startles offended. That’s my favorite thing in dreaming, I can do and say what I’d never dare in real life.

“Do you think we don’t notice when you’re just fudging, walking around with the guitar and use the change of amplifier setups as an excuse to take a few sip of your booze? That doesn’t really count as musical contribution.”

“Ugh, busted. I try not to drink before the show though. Right as soon as I get onstage I start drinking. But come on, I never belch out of key, what’s this if not musical humility?”

I snort shaking my head and keep grinning from ear to ear. If he’s such a hilariously funny guy in my fantasy, how adorable he can be in the reality… I know he used to be an annoying, sarcastic little shit but when PJ got really successful, he mellowed down and made himself to the main target of his irony… The mixture of this down-to-earth humbleness and calm confidence was one of the main reasons why he became my favorite member in the band; in the band that only consists of great, relatable people, by the way.

Maybe I should use the occasion to have a chitchat with him, I could ask him questions about stuff I’ve always wanted to know… even if the answers are only the products of my mind…

“Do you see the world in yellow?”

Okay, maybe that’s not the best start but the colored lenses of his spectacles somehow distracted me and it just slipped out. He reacts with that short, amused eyebrow twitch I love… good job, Maggie.

“It’s a good question! It’s funny, nobody asked that before… but to answer it, I do, it’s like being trapped in that moment of sunset when everything is glowing in that golden light… but to be less poetic, it makes everyone look as if they were Lego figures, they have yellow head, y’know…”

The mentioning of my favorite toy brings back old memories about the times when I was building my own town with eclectic houses that served as the scene of the made-up action stories crafted by my cousin and me.

“I you were a Lego figure, you’d be a bad boy.” I remark with a timid smile and try to ignore the fact that my cheeks are in flames.

“Only if I were a Lego figure? That’s offensive. I was the member of the gang Newton Street Boys. We were the most dangerous guys on whole Capitol Hill, we terrorized the district by taking protection rackets from kindergarten pupils. They were scared to death when we showed up riding our bikes, I liked the banana-seat ones with the high handlebars - maybe a card in the wheel could have been part of it.” he chuckles playfully. “Anyway, why a bad boy?”

“It’s because of the scruff.” I giggle and reach out to pinch his neck but he leans away.

“Please don’t touch me.” he grunts.

Hey, brain, we had an agreement: if I behave decently enough in real life, you won’t throw any obstacles in the way of my naughty tendencies at nights. So if I want to touch Stone’s perfect neck, I’m gonna to do it. Period.

“I said no!!!” he repeats this time angrier when my fingers approach his skin again. What the hell???

“Sorry. I… I just wanted to say that there were those bearded figures… and you could get them mostly from the pirate or the police station series.”

“You mean they had an attachable Lego beard?” he inquires confused and excited at the same time; I’m sure he’s already forgotten the embarrassing intermezzo and is now desperately trying to recall the look of the little yellow dudes.

“Haha, no, it was just painted on their face. There was the moustache, the regular beard and the scruff that basically meant black dots on their face. And the scruffy guys always played the role of the bad boys in my stories. You know, the bank robber, the fleeing prisoner…”

“… the fucked-up musician… we should definitely have a Lego party once!”

“We should…” I repeat and we’re smiling silently at each other for a few seconds… I clear my throat and swallow hard since my mouth got completely dry, shit, it must be that damn gum-shield I have to wear at nights to prevent myself from gnashing.

“You want some water?” he asks walking to a fridge standing at the door.

“Fuck, yes, I’m dying of thirst.” I moan and I mean it.

“Here.” he hands a small bottle to me while he opens a beer can. I rather don’t make any remarks, the show is over, after all… But now that I think into it, maybe the other band members will show up too… I can’t wait!

I lower my head and press the ice cold bottle against my forehead. It feels incredibly good, that blinding pain is still pulsing in my head. As I direct my gaze onto the ground, I can’t help laughing again when I spot his dress shoes and the black socks tucked into them. The hem rolled down around his left ankle making the socks look like they were unmatched.

However thirsty I am, I can only take small sips since I’m already snorting at the next part of this weird vision.

“Anyway… before the others would arrive, there’s one thing we have to discuss.” I begin when I finally manage to force my facial muscles into a serious expression.

“Something that stays between us? Like a dirty little secret?” his face lights up with a boyish smile.

“Kind of, if your socks are dirty…” I roll my eyes. “It’s the footwear.”

“Yours or mine?”

“Of course yours, mine is normal. Matching boots, a totally adequate choice for a rock concert. But yours is just… criminal.”

“Don’t be rude with my shoes, they look good and they are comfy as fuck!” he circles with his feet comically.

“They do but man, look in that mirror!” I point at his reflection in the mirror hanging on the opposite wall. “You look like the mixture of an elementary school boy and a bachelor dressed by his mother. Shorts with dress shoes? How? Why? It’s an obvious no-no!” I scream.

“I have only these ones, sneakers and flip flops with me, which doesn’t leave much variation.” he shrugs briefly.

“You should have chosen the sneakers… as for the “f” word, I’m not even willing to pronounce it.”

“I always wore hiking boots in the earlier times, they were the most comfortable choice but they weren’t compatible with the heat on stage. And then, I got introduced in the magical world of orthopedic sandals but the band somehow vetoed them, I don’t really understand why... I was only allowed to wear them between shows and at soundchecks but at gigs, I had to wear the boots… Once, before a show, maybe in Atlanta, I can’t remember exactly, the sole of my boot separated so I could only wear my sandals… the guys freaked out about my velvet shorts-sweatpants-white socks-sandals outfit and obliged me to wear Jeff’s shoes during the show.” he recalls but I can barely listen to him, his hand talk and the fidgeting alien fingers are definitely more appealing than the image of Birkenstocks worn with socks.

As my eyes are glued to him, I involuntarily start playing with my hair but my fingers land in something sticky. I check them and glance at him helplessly, as if he could help me find out why blood is the next nonsense feature in this scene.

“Fuck, why didn’t you tell me earlier that you’re bleeding?” he shouts and rushes to the fridge.

“Because I didn’t know…” I mutter and can’t form further coherent sentences since he steps back to me with an ice bag and presses it to the back of my head… and he keeps standing opposite me with his arms laced around my neck. I’m desperately trying to look at the ceiling, the ground and the four walls at the same time, anywhere but him…

“This is too embarrassing, I want this to finally end… this is terrible.” I whisper in pain, fixing my gaze on the ugly shoes and working on calming down my hyperventilation with all my nerves.

“Hey, I just wanted to help! Just for the record, we don’t often let passed-out fans in the backstage, you were in bad shape and…”

“No, I mean, thanks and all but this dream… it’s going nowhere, it was funny but you entering into my personal space creates a tension that needs resolution, like a hug or a kiss or anything, this makes just no sense!” I blurt out, basically arguing with myself, the director of the movie.

“What? That doctor could finally arrive, you must have a concussion!” he gently tries to push me back onto to the couch but I shake his hands off me.

“What doctor... wait… the pain… the blood… is this… real?” I flail still hoping he doesn’t exist and suddenly disappears or turns into my real crush or Edge from U2 or whatever.

“You got hit with by a half-empty beer can and you passed out so the security personnel fished you out of the crowd. Since I came back anyway, I suggested that they should lay you down here until they get a doctor. You got a backstage pass by passing out. A backstage pass out.” he tries to ease he situation with a pun but I’m not really in the mood.

“No… the scruff… the shoes… the ki… I can’t believe I said all this bullshit, this is worse than a nightmare…” I bury my face into my palms completely mortified and stumble back towards the couch dizzily. Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice… Mel!!!

***

“I’m not going to repeat this again, my best friend is in that room so if you won’t let me in immediately, I’m going to fuckin’ sue you!!!” Mel pointed with her index finger outraged at the huge guy standing in front of the door of the dressing room. Actually, instead of suing, she wanted to headbutt him in the chest but she knew it would feel like running into a concrete wall. She’d already been arguing with him for like fifteen minutes but the guy was just standing there with folded arms, stoically bearing the threats and the various spells casted on him by the furious girl.

“Hey, Ernie, I think you can let her in, her friend has just woken up, it’d be better if she’s with her when the doctor arrives…” a top of a head with ruffled hair peeked out of the door. The security guard obeyed and silently stepped aside.

“Maggie!!!” Mel shouted and tossed the young man in the door away to get a free way to her friend. “I was so worried about you!!!” she captured her into a rib-breaking hug.

“I’m… I’m okay… Stone took care of me…” Maggie mumbled against Mel’s chest trying to point at the guitarist under her friend’s arm.

“Stone???” Mel screamed making both of them turn around without breaking the hug.

“Yup.” the guitarist waved clumsily with one hand at her, digging his other hand deeply in his pocket.

Maggie managed to tiptoe enough to rest her head on her friend’s shoulder, which allowed her to saw the door opening… only to recognize the other members of the band arriving back from the stage. The small group was guided by Jeff who stopped at the door exchanging a surprised look with the embarrassed guitarist standing in the room.

Maggie started silently shaking of laughter because she could already imagine what’d happen next…

“Uhm… Mel… I’m choking… please let me go…” she acted patting her friend’s back a few times. “I think you should turn back… slowly…” she recommended biting her lips to hide her amusement when she pulled away to see the girl’s reaction.

“Why… what…?” Mel looked back over her shoulder and… due to the bassist’s excellent reflexes, she didn’t land on the ground but in his arms. Jeff stared shocked alternately at the unconscious girl and the other ones, begging for help with his eyes.

“Jesus, not again… “Stone sighed facepalming.” She’s yours, I’m out.”

[beepbeeprichiellc]

Please, please, please, PLEASE tell us what happens in the 74 and 86 promp fill that you did. How is Eddie going to react? Is he going to forgive Richie just like that or will there be angst???????

This took me forever! Sorry…. Part 1, Part 2

Eddie awoke with a painful crick in his neck. 

Not that he would ever complain about it, or the fact that his bed had lumps or that his room was always ten degrees colder than the rest of the house. There were a million things that scratched at his skin but he would never ever tell a living soul. Throwing his floral bedspread over his awkward form he reached over and shut off the blaring alarm, groaning into his pillow. At least it was Friday, the mask he wore around school could finally be peeled off and he could sulk in all the things that weighed him down. It was easy enough, fooling the people at school. They ate right out of the palm of his hand, fawning over the new and improved attitude that he had developed over the past six weeks. Even the losers seemed unaware of the torture he was in. 

If people knew that he had been kicked out of his home, thrown into the night like some kind of dog that his mother had grown out of they would mourn his so called loss. What they would never know was that he-Sonia’s perfect little Eddiebear-had been the one who initiated it, the one who screamed at the top of his lungs until they were black with hate and vulnerability. He had called his own mother a bitch and a whore like he was some delinquent with a vendetta. It was like he was a puppet who had finally pried the ventriloquists hand out of his own ass and made a break for it. In the end he was put out with the clothes on his back and twenty five dollars in his wallet. 

He had made it to the park where he sat until nearly dawn just soaking in what had happened. There was no home anymore, no roof over his head or meals for his stomach. There had been a thought-or rather a person that had popped into his head but his heart hung heavy at the realization that he could no longer go to him-that door had been slammed shut. More than anything he wanted to walk that familiar path, bang on that familiar window and puff his chest out with dignity. Richie would’ve been so proud of him, or at least the memory of Richie would. Eddie had never felt so alone, so lost. With nowhere to go and no one to call he waited for something-anything to do that would keep him alive long enough to see the sunrise. 

That something turned out to be a red haired girl who was cutting through the grass, on her way home. Without a word she had sat beside him and pulled him close which shattered the illusion. Somehow she had known, and in that cold morning he had wept for the person who he had been and also for the person he was going forward. Eddie Kasprbak had died on that bench and he was terrified of what was left. 

There was a knock at his door, “Wake up Eddie, we are going to be late.” 

“Okay!” He yelled back, forcing his body out of bed. Without really thinking about it he went through the motions and made it down the staircase in ten minutes flat. While running his fingers through his messy hair he followed the smell of cooking meat and was surprised to find a full spread on the kitchen table. “What is-”

“Happy Birthday!” The Hanscom family sang, including Beverly who either just got there or had snuck in sometime last night. While Eddie stood there dumbstruck, Mrs. Hanscom came over to him and wrapped her arm around his shoulders, pulling him into a sideways hug. It was warm and inviting, unlike his mothers which had always seemed greedy and cold. 

This woman-Eddie had decided-was some kind of angel. Arlene Hanscom had always wanted a big family but that had been stolen from her the day her husband had come home with a folded flag. Ben mentioned her a few times but Eddie himself had never really met her until Beverly had brought him there from the park. It took literally no convincing-not even a nudge from either Ben or Beverly and before Eddie knew it the spare room was cleared out just for him. Beverly was there nearly every night-seeking comfort after her father had fallen asleep. In that sense, Eddie was jealous. Ben was there-always there for her no matter what shape she was in and never asked for anything in return. It was hard to adjust to but Eddie made sure to do his best not to offend his hosts. 

“Don’t tell us you forgot your own birthday!” Mrs. Hanscom cooed, leading Eddie to his chair. “Eighteen! My, what a fun age.” 

“You really didn’t have to do all of this.” Eddie said, looking up to the woman. 

“Nonsense.” She replied, brushing off his sympathetic look. “A birthday should be celebrated! You are finally an adult Eddie!.” Eddie smiled, it was a thin one that came from somewhere in his chest but it was enough to keep Mrs. Hanscom happy. Turning to the food he felt no hunger, which was more normal than not. 

“So, you are finally the big one-eight. How does it feel?” Beverly asked, shoving a partially eaten sausage into her mouth. 

“I don’t know, the same I guess.” He shrugged. 

“Well we are all going to get together tonight to celebrate.” Beverly shot back, making sure that Ben’s mom was turned away before adding, “Mike’s scoring the beer.” 

“I’d really rather not.” Eddie said to his eggs. 

“Oh come on.” Ben chimed in, “It’s your birthday.” 

Eddie huffed, knowing full well that here was no win in this. The Losers celebrated every birthday the same way since 16, getting secretly shit faced at Mike’s farm and soaking in each others company but that was the thing-Eddie wasn’t really enjoying all the company lately. Things had been shaky between the group, all subtly joining sides after his and Richie’s falling out. Eddie tried not to notice, but the tension was so taught he could play it like a violin. Yet another thing that weighed down on his shoulders. 

After finishing breakfast they walked to school, Beverly talking on about their little get together. Eddie zoned out somewhere between what she was going to wear and what she was going to burn in the bonfire. Eddie nearly jumped out of his skin when a pair of hands grabbed his hips from behind-the noise that came from his mouth was less than manly. Surprisingly, it wasn’t a friend but rather Rick, someone who Eddie had been somewhat seeing over the past month. “Jesus don’t do that.” He scorned. 

“Sorry Eddie, I was just trying to surprise you!” Rick cooed, moving to the space between him and Beverly. His arm slipped around his shoulder making Eddie’s cheeks flush. “You know if you would just let me drive you, I wouldn’t have to sneak around.” 

“Sorry but I can’t let these two walk alone, they would never make it to class.” Eddie’s excuse made Beverly snort. It was a lie, and they all knew it. Only one person had ever driven him to school, it had been a tradition since the trashmouth had turned sixteen and Eddie couldn’t bear to let anyone else take the mantle. 

“It’s okay.” Rick assured, smiling over to the couple as they parted at the double doors of the school. “I get it, your friends mean alot to you.” 

God why did he have to be so perfect, it just wasn’t fair-Eddie didn’t deserve it. In reality, this thing was just something Eddie was using to busy himself with which was a shame because holy fuck-Rick was so sweet. In another world-another universe Eddie could see himself really falling for him but his heart was still swollen and bitter from the last time Eddie had tried to give a piece of it away. 

“Hey Eddie! Happy birthday!” Mike called from just down the hall, ensuring that every person after wished him as well. This made Eddie cringe at the attention. 

“Holy shit, it’s your birthday?” Rick asked, sounding disappointed. “Oh man, I’m so horrible! I didn’t know!” 

“Don’t worry about it.” Eddie muttered, letting Ricks arm fall so that he could get to his locker. “I forgot myself.” 

Rick laughed, the sound something he wished he could substitute for someone else’s. “You forgot your own birthday? Really?” Eddie shrugged, “Okay, how about I make it up to you tonight? I’ll take you out to a movie, your pick.” 

“Can’t.” Eddie sighed, “The gang is getting together to celebrate. It’s kind of a tradition.” It was like venom dripping from his tongue, the annoyance clear as day. 

“Ah I see.” Rick sounded disappointed, making Eddie’s heart clench. “You know Eddie I wanted to talk to you about something. I think I want to-” The bell rang out, silencing whatever Rick was going to say. Eddie shot him a look of sympathy, making Rick’s mouth snap shut. “Let’s talk later.” Rick said, bend down to place a peck onto Eddie’s cheek. This should make Eddie’s stomach flip but all it did was leave him with a sense of emptiness. 

Eddie watched him leave and begged himself to feel something-anything but couldn’t. Giving up he swam through the sea of students to get to this most dreaded period. Without looking around he sat in his seat, right up front. This was the only class he shared with Richie and in the nine weeks following his little slip up they had talked a total of one time and that was just when Eddie was forced to ask him for his notes. It was weird and cold and Eddie vowed to fail before doing it again. 

“Hey Eds.” 

Eddie choked on the air in his lungs at the sound, the voice sending shivers down his spine. There sitting at the desk beside was Richie Tozier himself, wearing his favorite ripped jeans and the hoodie Bill had gifted him last Christmas. Eddie blinked, unsure that he wasn’t imagining the whole thing. “U-Uh yea?” 

“I know we haven’t really talked since well-” His voice trailed off, his hand making a vague geustrue in the air. Clearing his throat he continued. “I just wanted to say happy birthday and to give you this.” Reaching into his bag Richie pulled out a small box gift wrapped in bright colors. He handed it to Eddie-who only starred. “Uh-I got it for you-” Still, Eddie watched, unmoving. “Okay well here ya go.” In slow motion he put the box in front of Eddie, as if afraid that he would scare him away. 

Richie disappeared back into the back of the class and the teacher began to lecture. Eddie could only watch the box, the rainbow Happy Birthday mocking him in every way. Despite his better judgment he pulled apart the wrapping and peeled open the box. 

It was a music box. 

Not just any music box but the one Eddie had fawned over six months ago in that thrift store the group had dragged them to three towns over. As he opened it the ballerina began to dance, the melody floating up towards the sky as if trying to escape the darkness of the world. It was just as beautiful as it had been all that time ago, the porcelain cold and frightening in his hands. 

Oh god, he was going to be sick. 

Grabbing his backpack he bolted from the room, the sound of his own name following him out into the all. There was no stop, not when he met the double doors or when the crisp wind touched his tear streaked face. Eddie had no idea where he was going but he knew that he had to get there before he completely broke down. 

So he kept running. 

What a fucking birthday.

[lucarioisinthevoid]

Dark was the night. The moon shined bright. Snow was covering the green fields outside- Wait. This doesn’t work in English. Dammit. Oh well. It was a peaceful evening- or rather, late noon. It just got dark THAT early, so it felt like evening already. The restaurant laid abandoned, in silence, as everyone had gone to sleep ea- BAM, DOOR BUST OPEN, JEREMY EMERGED FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL, LIKE A TRUE GREMLIN. “CHRIIIIIIIIIIIIIISTMAAAAAAAAAAAAS!” DAVE AND OLD SPORT CAME FROM THE CEILING, DROPPING DOWN IN LIQUID FORM BEFORE BECOMING SOLID AGAIN. “CHRISTER MISTER, CHRISTER MISTER, CHRI-“ Poor Mike who sat there, wearing a Christmas hat was close to losing it. “COULD YOU STOP FUCKING SCREAMING!?” “NO,” Dave responded, mercilessly. “IT’S CHRISTIAN’S BIRTHDAY. WE GOTTA CELEBRATE.” Jeremy made an offended noise. “No- not- don’t make fun of this! This holiday is REALLY important to me!” “Why.” The response was pretty casual. “Because- well- it’s a very happy day that is meant to remember that all of us can be forgiven!” Old Sport turned away, trying not to laugh. “Aw, I’m sorry Jeremy. We didn’t mean to make fun of you.” “YOU BETTER! BECAUSE THOSE THAT DO ARE NAUGHTY AND DON’T GET COOKIES!” As threatening as the average golden retriever puppy he pointed at them. However, both of the colorful killers whined and rolled over. NOT DENYING COOKIES! Simon entered the room, eggnog in hand. “What’s the chaos about?” When he spotted Mike, he moved over to hand him a glass. This was met with a scoff. “I can’t have alco-“ “It’s free. I’ll spike my own drink.” And with that Simon took out a giant flask and began pouring it into his own cup, more and more much to Mike’s amazement. “… thanks… I guess…?” “No problem. I look out for you.” He took a hearty swig from the eggnog. “I love the holidays. I love being allowed to drink.” “Yeah, sure, rub it in.” Grumpy Mike responded. “Oh, sorry, didn’t, uh- didn’t mean that.” “As if.” They looked out into the group that surrounded them, throwing around snowy glitter and chattering on about what kind of cookies they wanted. Eventually Mike nudged the Phone. “… hey, is that the detective there or am I losing it again?” “That is the detective, yep.” “… so nobody planned to tell me, huh?” At this point he wasn’t even surprised. The detective was being ushered around by the giant machines around him, pushed forward towards the two of them. Awkwardly he approached, looking at each of them. “… I… I think the animatronics would like to be decorated. Would that be- can we-“ Two bodies crashed into him right away, before he could even finish and both the Orange Guy as well as Jeremy, sitting on top of him, excited. “YES WE TOTALLY CAN DECORATE THEM!” “W-we could cover them in fake snow and give them little ornaments-“ “FLASHING LIGHTS. EVERY KID IN THE WHOLE CITY SHOULD GET SEIZURES. WE COULD RACK UP SUCH A KILL C- I MEAN, CHRISTMAS COUNT FOR ALL THE JOY WE ARE SPREADING!” Jeremy looked at him from the side. “Listen, Old Sport, I really love and look up to you, but if you ruin Christmas for me, I WILL do things to you that won’t make me proud.” Four sets of eyes stared into him, but he didn’t waver. Christmas is NO joke. And he wouldn’t let ANYONE get in the way of it. After he felt like the seriousness of the situation as set in, he was cheerful once more. “Anyways, can we decorate them Mr. Phone Guy? Please, please, please! We’ll be careful!” Freddy joined in. “Yes, boss, it would be nice… wouldn’t you let us have some holiday spirit too?” “Uh-“ Unsure he looked between the people. “… sure?” Children’s cheering sounded, as they all ran off to get something festive to put onto them. The Phone Guy sighed. “I’ll regret this, won’t I?” With that he took out the flask again and downed the liquid without a hint of hesitation. Ethan was still sitting there, seemingly lost. “… I really can’t leave.” “Wow. Big fucking surprise.” Mike responded, dripping sarcasm. “I- I just meant that’s why I’m still here. I didn’t mean to- interrupt your Christmas celebration.” For a moment Phoney inspected the detective, then shook his head. “We don’t mind you here.” “I didn’t even get a present for anyone.” The man blurted out. “We, uh- nobody did.” “Oh.” Insecure he looked around. “I… I suppose then it’s okay.” Suddenly he yelped as a sudden cold feeling hit the back of his head. Snickering came from the door, Chica was looking in and snickering. “H-hey- are- is she supposed to do that?!” Quickly the detective wiped away the wet feeling from his neck. “Won’t it hurt their- the mechanics inside of them-“ Smugly Mike grinned. “The only one I’M seeing getting hurt is your fucking ego. Getting hit like that? PATHETIC.” Staring down at him, Ethan paused, then slowly crossed his arms. “… true. You’re right. I won’t bother you any further.” Quickly he left towards the door. “Think that little bitch was insulted?” The guard asked his friend, but only got a shrug in response. Soon enough his mind was taken out of it though, as Jeremy came out of the back again, handing out plates of warm cookies. The machines had been decorated with paper snowflakes, with actual false snow, Foxy had a little glittering balls hanging from him, while Bonnie was covered in colorful lights. Everyone was happy and proud so far. Jeremy gifted everyone handcrafted papers with a thank you and what they appreciated about them- even the detective was supposed to get one, now that he was confirmed to be here and stay around. The others promised to get him something as thank you and that they were sorry for not having prepared anything for this year’s Christmas. He reassured them that he didn’t need another gift aside from their company, but secretly was looking forward to getting gifts. Happily he bit into his cookies, sitting in a circles with the others, in front of a fire that they just started in the middle of the main hall. “I hope everyone is having a nice Christmas! And remembers that each Christmas is a new chance to forgive and that there’s nothing more valuable than peace in your heart.” Dave chimed in. “Nothin’ except a tank. A tank is fuckin’ valuable. Jeremy, imma build you a tank for next Christmas.” All in all it was a peaceful Christmas Eve. Oh yeah, Mike and Phone Guy were later in the evening found drowned in a pile of snow. Chicken and human footprints were found in the snow, but no strong suspects were found. An oversized duck that we saw on a street near the incident commented on the event with “Pathetic.”

In the distance, in the void, a small figure sat alone in front of a fireplace, wearing a Santa hat and drinking hot chocolate. The little lizard had a decorated tank, which included a miniature decorated tree that he seemed to be pretty happy about, as well as a few stacked grasshoppers that he occasionally ate from. It looked like Henry was watching the fire, but actually he was watching the people in the restaurant, lost in thought. Jealous? “… not in the slightest. Stuff like that stresses me out, I am happy to not be part of it. I do lament the lack of snow in the void though.” Wouldn’t you know it, snow started to pick up, dancing through the darkness, not cold, not warm, only there for a second before disappearing again. And for once, Henry smiled a little, peacefully. Bless you, murder monster man. “Bless you too. Whatever blessings you may wish for.” (I just felt like writing a small something for Christmas, to get everyone in the mood... seeing as I couldn’t make a dedicated chapter for it Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukah or Bestested Holidays, I love you all and hope you have some wholesome days the next while :3 )

[notagoodplace4gods]

ok but stozier where (this is overuse prob so sorry) rich starts really believing stan doesnt like him in their late teens bc of anxiety and stuff and starts to distance and heyoo flippin the script w/ stan coming in through the window like “wtf man??? ur literally my best friend ily” and then like back to stans and its just pure fluff bc heyo these boys mad in love and richies just like “holy shit ily wowowowoow” yike sorry ~✨

I’m so sorry for taking so long!! This is not exactly what you asked for, but I still hope you’ll like it! Here we go!

It’s on AO3

when stan starts avoiding richie after they went to prom together as bros, richie knows he’s fucked up

he doesn`t know how he fucked up, tho, because he was drunk as hell and he barely remembers what happened

when stan starts avoiding richie after they go to prom together as bros, richie knows he’s fucked up

he doesn’t know how he fucked up, tho, because he was drunk as hell and he barely remembers what happened

the losers can’t tell him what he did because “stan didn’t let you do anything embarrassing, he took you home the moment he realized you were drunk”

richie makes eddie pinky swear that he didn’t see him make a fool of himself at prom

Relieved by his answer, richie starts thinking that maybe stan’s just messing with him Maybe it’s just a joke and he decides to play along

“well let’s see how long he can pretend not to love me lol he won’t last a week”

stan lasts more than a week not talking to richie, barely acknowledging him in the group hangs

richie is low key worried and grows louder so he can draw stan’s attention by any means necessary, which means cruder jokes, over the top impressions, dirty flirting, but stan keeps ignoring him

richie goes from frustrated to angry really fast

and he complains about Stan to everyone, literally everyone but Stan The Man himself

“we don’t know anything richie, why don’t you talk to him?”

richie tries cornering stan after school one day, but stan keeps dodging his questions and answering with “I’m fine”s, which only pisses richie even more because he knows stan isn’t fine

“come on stanley I know you’re angry at me! what did i do?”

“why do you think the world revolves around you, richie? you didn’t do anything and we’re fine.”

“we’re not fine! God, stan, just tell me what I did so I can fix it! Was it because I drank too much and you had to take me home? Was it because I made you leave the prom earlier?”

“what? no richie, that was fine and… Wait, don’t you remember what happened later?” stan takes a deep breath and tries to mask the hurt on his voice. “You don’t.”

“I was drunk… I…”

“Sure, it’s okay, we’re okay, nothing happened, I just have to go.”

richie tries to stop him by grabbing his arm, but stan flinches away so fast richie’s freezes on the spot. Now he’s high key worried

now he knows he’s fucked up.

——————

richie kinda starts avoiding stan back after this, afraid he’ll make  things worse between them

he never asks the losers to intervene, but everytime he meets them, he asks if stan said anything about him

the losers have no idea what’s happening, and they hate it, so they make a plan to get both richie and stan drunk and talking

it’s very difficult getting them together, and moving past the awkwardness, but they do get them drunk, they all get drunk, one night at bill’s. and they’re playing truth or dare

when the bottle stops on stan, richie perks up at the possibility of stan picking truth so he can ask what did he do to make his best friend so mad at him

stan picks dare

for a moment richie’s devastated, but then ben whispers something in his ear and he takes his suggestion.

“I dare you to tell me why you’re mad at me.”

“that’s cheating.”

“It’s the game, you have to tell me.”

“I’m not mad at you.”

“you are! just fucking tell me what i did!

“what didn’t you do, richie?” stan rolls his eyes. “you’re always so…” The alcohol is taking the words from him, so he just gestures at richie’s entire body, to make him understand. “You! It drives me crazy!”

richie’s taken aback. He knows he’s loud and annoying, but he never thought he bothered stan so much “I’m… I’m sorry,”

when they stop talking, the entire room does too. The only sound is when mike gets up, pulling bill along with him and gesturing the others to follow him. “Maybe we should leave you two alone.”

“no!” both stan and richie argue at the same time.

richie takes a deep breath. “come on, stan the man, I just wanna put this behind us and go back to being friends.”

“Friends.” Stan scoffs, and there’s so much venom in his voice, richie unconsciously recoils. “we’re best fucking friends”

richie doesn’t know what to answer, oh even what to feel, so he choses anger. “Fine! Have it your way then” and marches out of the party.

when richie’s anger drains away, he’s just really sad and hurt

the losers go to him the next day, begging him to talk to stan, saying that stan was miserable after he left the party, so “he doesn’t hate you.”

but richie just shrugs them off. stan does hate him. it was clear as day

but what could he have done that would upset stan so much? What was so terrible that ruined their friendship?

he tries his best to remember what happened after stan took him from the prom. He thinks about numerous possibilities, but nothing seems plausible

richie knows very well that he’s a cuddly, needy drunk. But Stan knows him, he’s used to the flirty jokes, the innocent (but not really) touches, and hugs

He remembers he always used to  call stan “love” and “honey” after a few shots, he remembers sitting on stan’s lap and throwing his arms around stan’s neck in other occasions, he remembers stan just shaking his head, lifting him up and making him drink some water before bed. Stan always acted annoyed but he never minded any of that

Not until prom night

Maybe richie crossed a line. Maybe he didn’t stop at the playful flirting and dirty innuendos. Maybe he drank so much, he turned his brain off, and let his heart unfiltered. Maybe he confessed. Maybe he told stan he’d been in love with him for years. Maybe he kissed stan

Oh fuck. oh no no no no nonononono

no wonder stan hates him now. no wonder he’s angry and disgusted and never wants to see richie again

richie wants to crawl up inside a hole and just die

—————-

richie knows stan has stopped hanging out with the others, so he does too

he secretly hopes that his absence will compel stan to return to the group

if anyone gets to keep the losers, if anyone deserves to keep the losers, it’s stan

plus, if stan finds his presence so unbearable, and hates him now, it’s just a matter of time before everyone else does too. If he can’t stop it from happening, then he better prepare himself for it

so he goes from school to home, and from home to school as quickly as he can, he avoids the quarry and the arcade so he won’t meet any of them

He misses them all, though. So much

But mostly he misses Stan

His best friend

the first friend he ever made

the boy with the sarcastic smiles and amazing sense of humour

the boy who always stood by him no matter what

the boy who’d always leave an open window for him to climb into at night

the boy who’d complain about how his bed was too small for them, but would never push richie away, or make him sleep on the couch

the shy quiet beautiful perfect boy richie admired and respected so much

the boy who’d smile at him, and make the stupid bucky beaver and his stupid trash mouth feel worthy and loved and worthy of being loved.

the boy he loved so much

the boy who didn’t love him back, not anymore

not ever

richie wonders if maybe stan misses him too, but the thought is so fucking unreal, he has to laugh.

all the handholding, the laughs, hugs, kisses on the cheek, richie ruined them

richie ruined their friendship

so why would it matter to stan

why would richie matter

spoiler alert: he doesn’t

richie’s loud and annoying and ugly as hell

stan deserves someone better

literally anyone would be better

probably a girl because stan can’t be as sick as he is

——————

the losers keep trying to talk to him, but he always manages to dodge their questions

Everyone is worried because richie looks awful ™ so they decide to do a intervention for them

but richie doesn’t show up to school the next day

Or the next

they’re going crazy with worry, because richie won’t answer his door either

stan is very worried too.

he feels terrible for how he treated richie the past few weeks. He was just sad, angry and bitter, but richie didn’t deserve the way he treated him

he tries calling richie on the phone, but every call goes to voicemail

stan knows it’s his fault.  He was the one who started ignoring richie first, but he’s so worried

He’s on edge all the time, can’t sleep properly, can’t eat properly, god, he’s a mess

He almost trips over himself when his own phone rings. Please be richie, he prays

It’s not richie

——————

bev is the one who gets richie to leave the house. she takes him for a smoke by the barrens

she told him it would just be the two of them

she lied

three cigarettes in, Stan arrives, and Bev excuses herself, mentally asking richie if he’ll forgive her someday

Stan quietly sits down next to richie, who refuses to look at him

They stay like this for a good half an hour. Stan looking at richie, richie looking anywhere but at stan

stan is about to cry, but he swallows the tears. This isn’t about him! This is about his best friend, who’s looking small and broken, and he has to fix it. He has to fix them

“I’m sorry.” He opens his mouth, but the words aren’t his. They are richie’s.

Richie’s apologizing to him

“fuck, stan, I think I finally know what I did to make you hate me, and, god, I’m so sorry.”

stan is speechless, terrified at the thought that maybe richie does remember that night

“I was never going to tell you, I was going to ignore it until it went away, but it’s been years, and it still hadn’t gone away, and I… I’m a horrible person… not worthy of being your friend

stan is offended. “Richie…”

“no… let me finish. I know what I did is unforgivable, and heinous and sick. And I’m so very sorry, but I can’t fix this. So it’s okay if you hate me and never want to see me again.I understand”

“richie!” Stan grabs his shoulders and shakes him a little.”What is it you think you did at prom?”

“you don’t have to do this.” richie shakes his head. “I know I… I kissed you. Didn’t I?.”

Now Stan starts crying. “No. no you didn’t.”

richie’s eyes go so wide it would be comical in any other situation

“Fuck. then you’re just mad at me for a stupid joke, or whatever and I went and spilled my feelings for you, instead of just apologizing. Now you hate me for real, and…”

“I don’t hate you, I never did and I never will.” Stan cuts him off.

richie nods dumbly, not letting himself feel relief because the fact stan doesn’t hate him does not necessarily means that stan likes him back.

“Do you wanna know what you did that made me so mad?” Stan waits for richie’s nod before continuing. If richie said what stan thinks he said, telling him about this should be easy. “You fell asleep.” It’s not

silence

richie does his best not to break it because he knows stan’s not finished

“I took you home, and tried to get you to bed. You didn’t want to. You wanted to dance.” Stan smiles at the memory. “I asked what could i possibly do to convince you to go to sleep and you asked me to cuddle you.”

richie cringes. well that was embarrassing

but it’s not the end of the story

“so I did. we laid down at your bed, and we were so close, I…” Now it’s stan’s turn to take a deep breath. “I kissed you, Richie. I kissed you, you kissed me back, but then you fell asleep mid kiss and I…”

richie’s heart stops, and he finally looks directly into stan’s eyes

“I was so ashamed, I couldn’t face you after this.” now it’s stan who diverts his eyes. “And then you told me you didn’t remember and I was so hurt, so angry. I mean, I knew you were drunk, I took a chance, but I still… God, richie, you were my first kiss.”

“stan.” richie kneels, and moves next to his friend, his best friend, the boy who, for whatever reason, loves him back, and takes his face on his hands. “stan, I’m sorry I’m so stupid.”

“It’s okay, richie.” Stan tries. “You were drunk, and I shouldn’t have taken advantage of that, then felt sorry for myself and acted like a jerk, but…” Stan’s hands are shaking. “I like you more than I thought I could ever like someone, and it scared me so much, I withdrew from everyone. I avoided you like crazy because I couldn’t let you know, I couldn’t let you reject me.”

“stan.” richie calls for him again, and their eyes meet. “stan, I’m stupid, but you’re also very stupid, oh my god, we’re so stupid.” he groans. “I like you. You like me back. We like each other.” He says it, slowly, as if trying to understand.

“We do.” Stan breathes, amazed.

They only stare at each other for a moment, holding hands like their lives depend on it.

“I’m sorry.” Stan says.

“I’m sorry too.” Richie says it back.

A pause. Then. “Do I get to redo that first kiss?”

Stan pushes him over, and richie laughs

“we never really danced at prom, did we? I bet you refused to dance with me after prom too.”

“I…” Stan narrows his eyes. “Do you really wanna dance, now?”

“Sure.” richie knows stan didn’t mean it as an invitation, but he takes it anyway. He bows. Stan rolls his eyes, but doesn’t stop richie from inching closer, and closer. “Let’s redo the entire night.”

They dance for a while, no music, no rhythm. They dance until richie steps on stan’s toes, and stan pushes him away so hard richie falls on the grass

They laugh, and laugh, and laugh

(god, they both missed this so much)

“Okay, so I’m never doing that again.” stan says, but he’s smiling. “We’re done, richie.”

“not yet.” richie says, getting back up, and he looks serious

he takes a step closer

stan takes another step to meet him in the middle and his hand goes into richie’s hair

richie’s hands are trembling, but he takes them to stan’s neck

they kiss

they look at each other

they kiss again and again and again

“Don’t you dare fall asleep on me again, asshole.” Stan says, lips brushing against richie’s

“Oh, don’t worry, Stan the Man, I’m up.” He motions down to his pants. “I’ll be up all night…”

“fucking my mom, i know.” stan answers, the same time richie finishes with “fucking you.” and they look at each other, for a second.

“Fuck you, richie.” Stan is trying to look mad, but he can’t stop laughing

“Well… if you want to, sure. I can be into it.” richie doesn’t miss his mark, but before he says anything else, stan’s kissing him again

richie kisses him back

and they kiss, and kiss, and kiss for a long time.

[darveyfics]

Christmas prompt- Donna and Harvey are a couple but they’re fighting. Every time they see mistletoe, they kiss. Eventually they make up. Idk just lots of angst and then fluff lol

Darvey & Mistletoe; aka the only Christmas tradition Harvey finds interesting. Bonus points if it drives Donna crazy :)

Mistletoe kiss fic please (it's up to you if they're already in a relationship or not)

Harvey and Donna fight right before Christmas

Harvey and Donna first Christmas as a couple

AN: I’m not sure if this is anything like what you wanted, but this one got away from me a lot. It’s a full blown fluff/cheese fest. Hope you still enjoy.

“Of Gingers and Kisses”

“Donna, come on,” Harvey heaves out a breath as he chases his relentless girlfriend out of the elevator. 

He stops short when she halts her steps, both of them standing in the middle of the annual- now Specter Litt- holiday party.

“You’re seriously going to continue giving me the cold shoulder?” Harvey huffs beside her, and if she wasn’t so pissed at him she would’ve laughed at the adorable pout he gives her.

“I think you’re forgetting why I’m so upset with you,” Donna retorts, crossing her arms over the black Prada dress she donned- flowing down her body instead of her usual skin tight dress look, complete with a pair of red hot pumps. 

Harvey sighs beside her, “Trust me, I’m not,” he mumbles, absentmindedly giving a few fake smiles to some of the firm’s employees that pass by. The party was in full swing now, taking place just off to the side of the library. Holiday music was playing in the background, a tall Christmas tree sat in the center of the room, honing in most of the attention to the surrounding area, strategically placed next to the open bar. 

He takes her arm then, gently guiding her until they’re in a semi-secluded corner of the room. 

“You know I didn’t mean to-”

“It wasn’t just that, and you know it,” she hisses, her eyes sending daggers his way.

His lips turn thin at her words, trying his best to reign in some self control and not smile at how cute she looked. He was still feeling the backlash from when he had called her that earlier. 

“Donna,” Harvey starts in that low tone of voice he only reserved for her, “I’m sorry, and for the way I acted afterward,” he repeats her earlier words right back.

“Are you?” She raises an eyebrow at him, firmly standing her ground and he tilts his head at her, trying his best to not let his irritation come to fruition.

“You know I am,” he tells her softly.

“Oh, so now you’re telling me what I know?” She shoots back with raised eyebrows. He gapes at her then, trying to formulate a sentence that won’t keep sending him to the dog house. 

“I-”

“Hey guys!” Mike’s all-too cheery voice interrupts their moment, appearing with a half filled champagne flute and his signature 100-watt smile. “Uh, why do I have a feeling I just walked into a couple’s quarrel?” He questions, blue eyes glancing from one friend to another.

“Oh, look, your puppy showed up,” Donna rolls her eyes.

“Whoa- she’s pissed,” Mike’s eyes widen comically before looking back to Harvey, “Dude, what the hell did you do?”

Harvey’s mouth opens at the same time Donna lets out a half-amused laugh, “Why the hell do you automatically assume it was something I did?”

“Because it’s you,” his former associate retorts without hesitation. 

“He’s not wrong,” Donna mumbles beside him.

“It’s- nothing, Mike.” Harvey shoots him a look in warning, trying his best to ward off his friend so he could continue talking to his girlfriend. 

“Nothing?” 

“Oh, boy,” Mike mutters, fearfully looking between the couple now.

“Donna, I didn’t mean-”

“The hell it was nothing,” she swivels around to face him, standing a mere inch away from him now, hazel eyes glaring at him.

“And… that’s my cue to leave, see you guys,” Neither notice Mike scurrying off to the side of the room, automatically finding Rachel in the sea of Specter Litt employees. 

“Donna, I just meant it was nothing concerning him,” Harvey sighs, willing his girlfriend to understand. His eyes subconsciously survey the area around them, trying to find the answers to his current predicament elsewhere. 

“You know, you’re being a real pain in the ass- mmph!” His lips land on hers in the next second, catching her off guard. She stays still for a moment, letting their kiss linger in half surprise and half reflex before she’s pulling back, “What the hell are you doing?” She seethes in a whisper.

Harvey gives her a sheepish smile and points up with his index finger. Donna’s eyes follow him and she purses her lips when she sees the small twig hanging above them. 

“Seriously?” 

“It’s tradition,” he shrugs, giving her his signature charm smile, hoping it would set her at ease then.

Donna shakes her head instead, annoyance seeping into her, “I need a drink,” she mumbles under her breath before turning around.

“Donna,” her name is a warning and a question all in one.

Her loose copper waves bounce when she turns around to face him again, rolling her eyes at him, “It’s a saying, Harvey, you can calm down.”

Before he could stop her again, she’s walking off to meet Rachel, standing by one of the array of decorative tables. Harvey sees his girlfriend’s best friend handing her what appeared to be apple cider as the two shared a laugh. He shakes his head then, turning around to grab a drink from the open bar. He didn’t notice when his own best friend left his wife’s side to come meet him.

“So,” Rachel starts tentatively after a couple of minutes of laughter, “How long are you going to make him squirm?” She tilts her head in the direction of the bar, Donna turning around to see Mike clasping a hand on Harvey’s shoulder as the two began a conversation. 

Donna chuckles, “I don’t know, I am still pretty pissed at him, but, it’s been fun watching him squirm and grovel for the past couple of hours.”

Her friend shakes her head, “You’re pretty evil, you know that?”

Donna shrugs, taking a sip of her apple cider, “Yeah, well, I’ll forgive him before Christmas. And hey, you’re one to talk,” she quirks an eyebrow in return.

Rachel lets out a laugh, “I don’t think I ever tortured Mike that long, though.”

“Hmm, true, poor guy’s gotta deal with double the trouble soon,” she places her hands on Rachel’s growing stomach, “how are thing one and thing two, anyway?”

Rachel smirks, still amused by her friend’s nicknames, “They’re fine. Pretty sure they’ll both make the soccer team, but I hear that’s normal.”

“Have you picked any names yet?” Donna smiles, feeling the babies kicking under her touch.

“We’re waiting to find out the sexes first, but if one of them is a boy, Mike really wants to name him after Harvey, at least for a middle name.” 

Donna’s features soften, her eyes filling with tears and she curses herself for her current uncontrollable emotions, “He would love that.”

Rachel nods with a smile in return.

“And well, if it’s a girl, you really can’t go wrong with ‘Donna’,” the redhead flips her hair in a dramatic gesture, giving her friend her signature overconfident look. 

Rachel lets out a bubbly laugh, “No, you really can’t.”

“So… you going to stay here all night drowning yourself in self pity for wherever it was that you did to piss off Donna so much?”

Harvey swirls the amber liquid in his hand before placing it down, turning to glare at his friend, “Is that why you came here? To lecture me?”

Mike puts his hands up in defense, “Hey, I just want to know why mom and dad are fighting, is all.”

Harvey’s lips quirk up at his words, taking a sip of his scotch before turning to face his friend again, “I may have… done something I shouldn’t have.”

“Well, no shit, Sherlock. Question is, how bad was it and what the hell are you going to do to make up for it?”

Harvey sighs, playing with the glass holding Macallan as he glances up at an awaiting Mike.

“Okay, before I tell you, you have to understand… this is… a big deal, for her, I don’t- really understand myself, but…”

Mike gives him an expectant look, “I’m literally so lost already so can you just spit it out already or…?”

“I may have…” Harvey looks away from his friend for a moment, eyes finding his favorite redhead before landing back on Mike, “eaten the last of the gingerbread cookies we had,” he finishes in a low mumble, turning away from Mike’s gaze.

“You-”

Harvey puts his hand up before he could continue, “Don’t try to analyze it, it is what it is.”

Mike stays quiet for a moment before nodding, “First trimester cravings.”

Harvey swivels his head around to his friend, “You know?”

Mike scoffs, “Of course I know.”

“How the hell do you-”

“Because,” Mike points to the corner, smiling when he sees his pregnant wife talking to Donna, “My wife and your girlfriend are best friends, they talk.”

“Why the hell didn’t you say anything?” Harvey prods, not knowing whether or not to be annoyed or amused. 

Mike shrugs, “Rachel told me and I figured you two would tell me when you wanted to. Though, I am a little offended that your girlfriend told my wife and you didn’t say anything,” he playfully pokes him. 

“Hey, we,” he points toward Donna, “had agreed not to tell anyone. I didn’t even know Rachel knew,” he mumbles before taking another sip.

Mike claps his hand over his back in assurance, “Rachel told me Donna had accidentally let the news slip, she’d been ‘adorably excited’ apparently.”

Harvey’s lips curl at his friend’s words, an all-too familiar fluttering settling in his stomach then- one he had been getting ever since Donna had dropped the news that she was pregnant weeks before, “She said that?”

Mike nods, mirroring his friend’s smile, “Yeah, and speaking of, congratulations, dad.”

Harvey’s lips stretch into a full grin at the word, still not used to the notion that he was going to become a father- the father of his best friend’s child, to be exact. He breathes out a quiet “thanks” to his friend, clinking his own glass against his when Mike extends his champagne glass to him.

“By the way,” Mike begins after taking a sip of his drink, “you should know I won the pool.”

Harvey’s brow furrows, “The pool?”

Mike nods, “Yeah, there was a pool going around to see when you two would finally settle down, have a family. I bet you would get her knocked up within the first year of you two dating,” he smirked.

Harvey gapes at him, trying to render in all of his annoyance. He watches Mike taking another sip of champagne, and he reaches out a hand, pursing his lips as he tilts the flute upward, causing the younger lawyer to choke on his champagne, the liquid spilling out in front of him.

“Dude!”

Harvey lets his lips twitch, automatically feeling better. He stands up in the next second, downing the last of his drink before clasping his hand on Mike’s shoulder, “And on that note, I’m gonna go. I have some making up to do.”

“Hey,” his voice is a low whisper behind her ear, and she supresses the urge to turn around and kiss him, mentally cursing the way her hormones were playing with her. 

Rachel gives her a knowing smile, waving hello to Harvey at the same time. She watches in amusement as her friend puts on her best acting skills and hides her smile before turning to face Harvey.

“Can I help you?”

Harvey sighs at his girlfriend’s stand-offish attitude, turning to face her friend, “Rachel, can I steal her away for a second?”

“Uh yeah, sure, I’m just gonna go see what Mike’s up to,” she leaves with a smile that turns into a confused frown when she notices her husband dabbing a napkin on his tie.

Donna lets out a dramatic sigh once they’re left alone again, or as close to it as possible with a mired of people surrounding them, “You wanted to talk?”

“Donna, you really have to help me out here, how long are you going to freeze me out?” She feels a twinge of guilt then, noticing the way his brown eyes bore into her own, a mask of of his own guilt written all over his face.

She had partly been annoyed with him- knowing that her hormones were in no way normal at the moment, but the other part of her had been having fun with him, enjoying the way he squirmed every time she had an outburst. 

“I haven’t decided yet,” she frowns instead, folding her hands over herself. Okay, so maybe Rachel was right and she was being a little evil with him. 

“I told you I’d buy you more cookies,” Harvey gently reminds her, taking hold of her hands in his. He was trying his best not to laugh at the matter- at how ridiculous this whole situation was because he had eaten the last of her gingerbread cookies.

“And I told you it wasn’t just about the cookies, Harvey,” real annoyance settles in her again and she moves away from him to walk to the corner of the room, with her boyfriend in tow.

“I told you I was sorry about what I said too,” he sighs again, trying his best not to lose his cool with his very emotional and pregnant girlfriend.

“Okay, A- you never actually said you were sorry about what you told me, and B-”

Her words are cut off again when his lips land on hers for the second time that night. She closes her eyes on reflex, internally groaning when he pulls back too soon, yet tries her best not to show her disappointment. When she sends him a confused glare he just points up again, and she rolls her eyes at the familiar twig.

“You’re shitting me, right? Who the hell decorated this place with mistletoes?” She berates then, glancing around the room to finally take note in the dozen or so mistletoes that decorated the area.

“I thought you were in charge,” Harvey remarks, a slight amused tilt to his voice.

Donna rolls her eyes, “I’ve also been dealing with morning sickness at all odd hours of the day, so no, I gave the job to- Louis,” she sighs when she notices the other name partner in the room, a shit eating grin on his face as he kissed Sheila under one of the mistletoes in the room. “Well, that explains it,” she mutters. 

Harvey turns his attention back to his girlfriend, “Donna,”

“What?” She crosses her arms over her chest again.

“You’re right, I didn’t apologize for what I said, but only because I meant it.”

She gapes at him, “You can’t be serious.”

“What’s so wrong about what I said?” Harvey throws his hands up, confusion taking over him.

“You called me cute, Harvey,” Donna reminds him.

“I-” 

“While we were in the middle of an argument, because you-“ she pokes his chest, “just had to eat the last batch of gingerbread cookies.”

She gives him a pout and he nearly loses it when her bottom lip begins to quiver and she turns to walk away again, this time to the far side of the room where there were less people present. 

Harvey internally groans when she walks away from him for what felt like the dozenth time that night. He catches up to her in seconds, reminding himself not to tell her how ridiculous this whole thing was, knowing that that would only get him sent to sleep on the balcony that night.

“Donna,” he begins softly, “I’m sorry.”

“For?” She sniffles, hugging her arms over herself.

“For being an ass,” he begins gently, taking a tentative step toward her, “for- making light of a situation I know must have- is- frustrating for you,” when she doesn’t back away, he grabs hold of her hands again, “I know this must be a really difficult time for you,” he rubs circles on her hand, and she sighs in response.

“It hasn’t been all bad,” she mumbles, staring up at his eyes.

His lip quirk slightly before sobering up again, “I’m kind of learning this as I go too, you know? And you did look cute. I mean, you always do, but, in case you haven’t noticed, I’m pretty infatuated with my pregnant girlfriend, I can’t help it if everything you do now is…cute.” He risks sending her a sheepish smile, and he fights back sighing in relief when she finally lets herself crack under his gaze. 

She rolls her eyes at his words, but her annoyance is diluted by the smile she sends him, “You’re pretty relentless, you know that?”

Harvey lets a full grin grace his features when she steps into his arms, “Does that mean I’m forgiven?”

“For eating my cookies when that’s what your unborn kid wanted to eat?” She raises an eyebrow at him.

He swallows back, “Seriously?”

“You and I both know I’m very serious when it comes to my cravings lately, mister,” she mumbles against him, winding her arms around him.

Harvey sighs, “I promise to buy you a whole pack. And then some.”

She hums against him, her lips hovering over his now, “I guess I can…” she toys with his tie, sending him a coy look, “forgive you.”

He lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding, “I promise to make it up to you, to both of you,” his hand rubs her stomach above the fabric of her dress, watching her face softening further beneath his caresses.

“We thank you,” she sends him a grin before closing the gap between them and slanting her lips over his, letting their kiss linger for a minute before pulling back. Harvey’s eyes glance above them, and his smile turns into a frown.

“We’re not under a mistletoe,” he observes, glancing back down to Donna.

She purses her lips at his words, “You want me to stand under a little Christmas twig just so you could kiss me? 

Harvey shrugs, “It’s the only tradition I actually like.”

Donna rolls her eyes at him, ”Fine, you want me to go and stand over there instead?”

When she moves to step away from him, he reels her back in, her chest flush against his now, “Don’t you dare,” he growls, pulling her in for another kiss. He lets his tongue boldly snake into her mouth, tasting the remnants of apple cider and something else he couldn’t quite get a read on at first. 

He pulls away from their kiss then, and she sends him a confused look when she finds him frowning, “What?”

“You had gingerbread cookies tonight, didn’t you?”

She bites her lip at his inquiry, giving him a shrug after a beat, “I may have… a secret stash in my office and went to eat some when you weren’t looking.”

He shakes his head at her, disbelief and amusement in his features, “So I didn’t eat your last stash. You had some here the entire time.”

“You ate the last ones we had at home,” she tries to defend.

“You know, I’d be more annoyed with you, but I can’t help but find all of this… cute.”

She gawks at him then, narrowing her eyes at his smirk, “Shut up.”

And with her mouth slanting over his smile, she makes sure he does just that. 

[solastia]

Faith | 2

Chapters:  [1] [2] [3] [4]

Pairing: Namjoon X Reader

Word Count: 3,569

Genre & Warnings: Fluff & Smut....and ANGST. I’M SORRY. 

Notes: This chapter seems a bit fragmented because it takes place over the period of a year. I wanted to show how good and cute they were together. 

“Where are your pants?”

You glance up from your movie to see Namjoon had let himself in again. This was slowly becoming the norm over the past month that you’d been seeing each other, and you found that it didn’t bother you in the slightest. In fact, you were pretty sure it gave you those warm, tingly, butterfly feelings everyone always went on about. 

“I’m sorry, sir, but in this household, we follow a no pants rule. The only exception is pajamas or if we have to wear pants to leave the apartment.” You pat the empty seat next to you on the couch and watch as he kicks off his shoes and pants before dropping into it, obviously exhausted. 

Another habit he’d developed over the past month was practically living in your apartment. He still went back to his place from time to time, mostly to get more clothes. However, he always came back here, and it was always the first place he’d go after work. You were already living like an old married couple, and you hadn’t even started calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend yet. 

“Hard day?” You lean in and peck the back of his neck as you massage his shoulders. He moans loud and dramatically, leaning into your touch. 

“Yeah. Construction is no joke.” He mumbles, looking down at his hands. 

Following his gaze, you see several blisters and chipped nails. You jump up and run to the bathroom, coming back with a bottle of aloe vera gel. Grabbing his large hand, you begin to slowly massage the gel in, taking care around the blisters. Namjoon sighed and leaned into the back of the couch with a small smile. 

“You’re too good to me, baby.” He whispers softly, and you smile up at him, shrugging. 

“It’s the least I can do. Maybe someday, when you’re a rich and famous rapper, you’ll think of me whenever you get some fancy Swiss Masseuse.” 

“Baby, when I’m a rich and famous rapper, we’ll be getting those fancy ass couple massages with the rocks.” 

You can’t help but internally squeal every time he says “We.” He uses it so often, especially when he’s talking about the future, and you wonder if he even realizes how it sounds. 

You were about to respond when you were interrupted by a tiny bark. 

Namjoon shot up and looked around, before looking at you in confusion. 

“What was that?” 

You grin sheepishly, before going over to the box that was next to your television. Pulling out the gray pitbull puppy, you use his little paw to wave at Namjoon. 

“Hello, large human. I am still unnamed male puppy. Pleased to meet you.” 

“Why do we have a dog? We didn’t have a dog before I left.”

“Yeah, well, get with the times. Things change. Ugh, you’re just another old guy who doesn’t wanna accept that the world is changing.”

“1, You’re older than me. 2, You still haven’t told me why we now have a dog.”

“You know Mike, the homeless guy that I always give my cans to? When he came to pick them up today, he had this little guy with him. He thought I might be able to take him in. Apparently, he was in a trash can. Like, a really big one. Meaning someone tried to literally throw him away.” 

“Holy shit, that’s fucked up! Gimme.” Namjoon reaches his arms out for the wriggling puppy, placing him on his chest as he leans back. 

“What’s up little guy? I’m your Dad.” 

“You’re his what?”

“What? Did you think I’d let you be a single parent?” He answers without even looking at you, petting the dog behind the ears. 

 You scoff at him. He really was adorable. 

“We have to give him a badass name, babe. Like, Tupac, or Nas.” 

“Does it have to be a rapper?” You whine, knowing that you’ll end up giving in anyway. Anything to see the dimples. 

“It doesn’t have to, but there are some cool names there. What about Snoop? You like Snoopy, I like Snoop Dogg.” 

You smile and kiss his forehead, dodging the puppy’s tongue coming after your face. 

“It’s perfect.” 

It was your two month anniversary. You were all set to surprise Namjoon with a nice romantic dinner tonight, maybe have some wild and crazy sex, and just have a wonderful day. Only, now you were walking home, dejected because you’d just lost your job. 

You’d been working as a waitress at a little restaurant for almost three years. They’d been promising you more hours for months, only to finally tell you today that they just weren’t making enough to have as many employees as they did. So, you were let go, along with three other people. 

You were so worried about what you were going to do. You didn’t have any savings because that was damn near impossible to do when you live paycheck to paycheck. Unless you found another job in the next two days, you weren’t going to have enough to pay rent, let alone feed yourself or Snoop. 

As you walk up to your apartment door, you can hear Snoop on the other side of it, sniffing and scratching at the door in his excitement to see you. You hoped Namjoon would be willing to take him for a bit if you had to leave your apartment. 

You open your door and Snoop starts jumping around you in excitement. The smells of Chinese food surround you, rap blaring from the kitchen as Namjoon is putting the contents of the containers onto plates. There was even a big bouquet of flowers sitting on the table. He looks up, smiling widely at you, and you melt a little. This was just so...domestic. 

“Hey there, Baby Girl. I had THE BEST show today. We sold out every ticket to get in the club. To see ME! I’m going to perform again next weekend, so make sure you get some time off. I want you to come see me so you can be proud of your man.” He’s talking so fast and he’s so excited. You really don’t want to ruin his mood, but his talk of taking time off reminds you of your dilemma. You watch as Namjoon notices your tears and his smile dims, making you feel guilty. He rushes over and grabs your cheeks between his large hands. 

“What’s wrong, Y/N? Did you not want me to let myself in when you’re gone? I’m sorry. I just wanted to surprise you.” He looks so worried and embarrassed, you feel bad for freaking him out. 

“No, it’s fine. I just had a hard day, and this was a nice sight to come home to.” 

“What happened?” He asked softly, picking you up and settling you into his lap as he sits on the couch. You lean in with a sigh, tucking your head under his chin. 

“They let me go. Now I’m going to have to...I don’t even know. I need to find another job as quickly as possible or I won’t be able to pay rent. I might end up having to have you keep Snoop with you for a while, while I figure something out. It’s times like these I wish I had decent parents. Although, Alan might let me crash with him for a little while.” 

Namjoon starts twirling a finger into your hair, playing with a curl. 

“OR, I could officially move in and pay the rent myself until you find something.” 

You lift your head to look at him, confused. 

“What? Joonie, I wasn’t asking for money. I don’t need you to do that.” 

“You don’t want me to be here?” His hurt tone had you rolling your eyes. 

“Namjoon, I was going to ask you to move in with me today, after a nice romantic dinner and all that jazz. But, now it would basically be you moving in to support me, and I’m not comfortable with making you do that.” 

“You’re not “Making” me do anything. I offered...no...I told you, I’m moving in. You already said you were planning on asking me anyway. I’m here all the time, use your water, eat your food. It’s about time I pay you back. Besides, what kind of a Father would I be to take Snoop away from his Mother? Not to mention, I’d have the added benefit of having 24/7 access to your body.” He wraps his arms around your stomach, kissing the side of your neck. 

“Woman, do you not understand that your happiness is my number one priority? Damn, I know it’s only been two months, but I love you.” The blush on his face contrasted so cutely with the forceful way he declared it. 

You sigh, leaning back into him. 

“I love you too, Namjoon.”

“Who the fuck puts peanut butter in the fridge?” You mumble to yourself, pulling out the container you were looking for and slamming it on the counter. Now you’d have to wait for the peanut butter to soften up before you could make a sandwich. And you were so fucking hungry. You’d come home from your new job at the grocery store, tired and starving since you’d not had your lunch. All you wanted to do was have a damn sandwich and go to sleep.

You and Namjoon had been living together now for five months. While most of the time it was great, since he was sweet and thoughtful, there were moments where you wanted to choke the life out of him. Like when he snored so loud he’d wake you from a deep sleep. Or how he NEVER changed the toilet roll. OR PUT PEANUT BUTTER IN THE FRIDGE. 

Grabbing the offending item, you stomp into your bedroom, where a corner had been changed into a little work area for his music. Two pairs of eyes look over at you as you stop in front of them. 

“Uh oh, sis is on a rampage.” Your brother Alan play whispered to Namjoon, the latter looking more worried. Ever since Alan had come over and discovered that you were dating the local rap legend, he’d been hard to kick out. Now he was constantly here, making music with Namjoon. 

“You shut up twerp. And YOU. Properly raised individuals do not put peanut butter in the fridge. I happen to know you were a properly raised individual because I adore your Mother. Do it again and die.” You’re shaking the container in front of Namjoon’s face, while Alan is howling with laughter, falling to the floor. 

“I can see who wears the pants in THIS relationship. Oh, wait, no pants rule.” 

Namjoon gathers you up, peppering kisses all over your face. 

“I’m sorry, baby. I made a sandwich and put it in there without thinking. Forgive me? I love you!” 

He even makes apologizing adorable. How does he expect you to stay mad? 

“It’s fine. I’m just hungry and now I have to wait for it to get soft.” You mumble, trying to act like you’re still pissed so you don’t look ridiculous for giving in too easy. 

He nuzzles his nose in your hair, acting cute. 

“You want me to get you something? How about Pho? You love Pho.” 

“I do love Pho.” You murmur in a cutesy tone.

“OK, Imma go get my baby some Pho. You stay here and get comfy and look pretty.” He smooches your cheek, before throwing on his jeans and leaving the apartment. 

“You guys are disgusting.” Alan huffs, and you throw the container of peanut butter at him.

You stare at the lines on the little stick in your hand. You guys had always been so careful, but apparently not careful enough. You had just taken five of these stupid stick tests, all of them coming up positive. You were pregnant. 

You look up as you hear Snoop yapping and noises coming from outside the bathroom. Namjoon, now your boyfriend for one whole year, had just come home. 

“BABY! I have some amazing news! Where are you?” Namjoon’s deep voice boomed as he made his way down the hallway. 

You quickly put all the sticks in your tampon box, knowing he’ll never look in there. You splash your face with water, trying to calm down before throwing open the bathroom door. Namjoon is on the edge of the bed, changing his clothes and he gives you the biggest smile you’d ever seen on him yet. You swear you’d never seen his dimples look that deep before. 

“Y/N, love of my life, my shining star. I have the best news in the whole world. You remember how packed it was at my show last week? Well, apparently there were talent scouts there. From a big ass label! Like, I can’t go into details yet, they said, but one of their rappers rhymes with Rake, ya feel me? And they want ME!! They want us to move to New York and they are going to sign me! Baby, we made it!” Namjoon is literally glowing, and you can’t bring yourself to mention the tests. 

“Congratulations, my Joonie. I’ve always had faith in you. I told you that you’d be famous as hell one day.” You force a giggle, not wanting him to catch on that anything was wrong. And truly, you WERE happy for him. No one else in the world deserved this more. 

“Let’s celebrate, Joonie. I’ll take you out for steaks!” You declare, shoving yourself into some jeans and dragging him out. 

You watch him over dinner, excitedly talking about his plans for the future (with a full mouth), and you slowly start to realize...you could never tell him. This was his chance. With his level of talent, you were sure he would be at the top in no time. You were going to have to set him free so he could do achieve his dreams, without worrying about you or what was soon to come. 

When you get home, you climb onto Namjoon’s lap as he lounged on the bed. 

“Namjoon? I need you to make love to me.” 

I’m going to need to savor this for God knows how long. 

“Happy to oblige, miss.” He jokes, pulling you in for a soft, slow kiss. 

You try to memorize every movement he makes with his plush lips. The angle of his head, how he teases the seam of your lips with his tongue to ask for entrance, the way sucks your bottom lip before he pulls away to smirk at you. He moves down to your neck, kissing and sucking on the spot that sports a hickey 90% of the time because he loved it. You silently wondered if it would be too cheesy and weird if you took a picture of it later. Your last love bite.

Namjoon pulls off your shirt and expertly unhooks your bra (Heh), throwing both off the side of the bed. He cups your breasts with his huge hands, gently rubbing your nipples with his thumbs. 

“Babe, have your boobs gotten bigger? They feel heavier, and like, the nipples look darker.” He’s staring intently at your breasts and you scramble to think of an answer. You should have thought about the fact that Namjoon knew your body so well by now. 

“Uh, maybe a little? I’ve been doing lots of chest exercises lately. That might be it. Or it could almost be time for my period.”

You wished. 

He shrugged and leaned over to suck your nipple into his mouth, laving it slowly with his tongue. You sigh and lean your head down to kiss the top of his head, smelling the scent of his citrus shampoo. He works his way down, stroking at your core and finding it already dripping wet. He maneuvers you to lay down and climbs over you. Just as he’s about to enter you, you decided that you want to top, so you push him down and hover over his hard cock. 

You look at his face while he’s watching you. Even after doing this countless times over the past year, he still looks at you like he’s amazed every time. His eyes are blown out and hazy with lust and adoration. He looks down as you hover above him, and his eyes follow when you drip all over his cock.

“Fuck, baby, that is so hot. Ride me, yeah?” He bucks up, trying to enter you, but you raise up even higher to avoid him. 

“How much do you want me, Joonie? Ah, I am so wet I would just slide right on. You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” You tease, and you know you shouldn’t, considering how you were going to be breaking up with him in the morning. But you had to know. You had to have this memory of Namjoon wanting you so badly that he’d beg for it. 

“Yes, I’d like that. God, I can feel how warm you are like that. Please, Y/N. Please, baby, just ride me. God, I want you so much. I’ll always want you.” He moaned, and you watched as more precum flowed from his tip. Knowing that he liked subbing too would have been useful information to know earlier, you mused. 

Deciding that you’d teased him enough, you slide down his cock slowly, relishing the stretch even though he’d been in you so often. Balancing yourself with your hands on his chest, you ride him, staring into his eyes. You watch as his cheeks start to redden and his breathing hitches. He’s getting close, so you speed up your hips, sliding up and down at a brutal pace. 

“Oh God, I’m going to cum Y/N. Fuck, yes Baby, like that.” He grabs your hips to help, making you go even faster. You can feel yourself getting closer. With a shout of your name, you feel Namjoon fill you up, bucking hard into you. You let yourself fall apart, cumming with him. You fall onto his chest, shaking and sobbing. You bury your face into his neck, and you were sure he felt the tears. He just pets your back in large circles, letting you calm down while his dick slowly softened enough to slide out. 

“It felt that good, huh? Wow, we’re amazing.” He cooed, and you snorted into his neck, before giving it a small kiss, breathing in the scent of post sex, sweaty Namjoon. With a sigh, you slide off of him onto your side of the bed, and he cleans you off with one of the baby wipes that you keep in your nightstand. He tucks you into bed before sliding in himself, pulling you up against his sweaty chest. He falls asleep quickly, the snores that would usually make you want to suffocate him with a pillow suddenly sounding like a lullaby. 

“You what?” 

Namjoon is staring at you like you’ve lost your mind, and you almost think you have. 

“I can’t go with you to New York. I think you should go by yourself. This is the most amazing opportunity for you, Joonie, and I wouldn’t want to mess it up for you. So you go, become the best, and I’ll be here waiting when the time is right.” 

“So, wait, are you breaking up with me?” Namjoon’s face is so pale, and you’re so damn heartbroken that you want to vomit. 

“Yes. I think it’s for the best.” You whisper, flinching when you hear Namjoon’s indrawn breath. 

“You’re not even willing to TRY? I mean, we could even try long distance, if you’re really so set against moving there?” He pleads, hands out and you back away. 

“No. I made up my mind. I love you so much, and I want you to have everything you’ve ever dreamed of. This is the best way. I have faith that when the time comes, we’ll come back to each other.” You try to contain the tears that you feel building in your eyes, and you avoid looking at him so he doesn’t see them. 

“Y/N, you’re everything I dreamed of.” He whispers, and you sob, running towards the door. You pick up the bag you packed and Snoop’s leash. 

“I’ll be staying at my brother’s until you leave. I...I love you Namjoon.” 

You close the door behind you and let the tears fall as you hear the sounds of his roars and crashing behind it. 

You’re laying on the hospital bed, sore but happy. You hold the bundle in your arms to your nose, smelling the oddly comforting baby smell. You click refresh on the laptop you were balancing on your thighs, happy to see the video that had finally loaded. It was the first music video of RM, the new rap talent the entire country was talking about. You click play, and watch with silent tears as the love of your life performs passionately about lost love, and you tilt the head of the baby to look at the screen. 

“Look at that sweetie. That’s your Daddy. Isn’t he handsome?” 

The nurse comes in with your paperwork, smiling at the two of you. 

“Here you are, just gotta start getting these all filled out. Do we have a name for our little Princess yet?” 

You smile down at the little face that already looked so much like her father. 

“Her name is Faith.”

[bbreactions]

Big Bang's Reactions to their tomboy gf being insecure about herself

[GIFs not mine]

A/N:

Hello!

IT. IS. SO. HOT. (that is how I am gonna cold the F down myself)

I am barely living I swear. Sof fucking hot. (excuse my language) How are you? Are you guys on holidays? I am not going anywhere this year... Thank you for all your request... I will work on them ^^

T.O.P He liked your short hair and was impressed how talented you are in sports. He fully supported you there and cheered on you. While you were looking through your wardrobe, you saw you don't have any dress. You thought he might be embarrassed by you because you never wear elegant dresses or put diamond earrings on. He found you laying in the wardrobe crying over your favourite pullover. "What's wrong my beautiful skater? Why are you crying over Mike (your pullover's name)? He did nothing wrong... Did he?" He tried to be funny and it worked for a couple seconds. After you told him what's going on, he told you how beautiful you are even when you go to his premiers in jeans and black shirt combined with Adidas hat. He told you how proud he is on you to be confident about yourself and know your talents so much. He was envious of you because you had so much confidence and talent that he never thought you might be thinking like that about yourself.

(I gave the pullover a name bc I wanted to hhahahahah...)

G-Dragon He was very happy you were a tomboy girlfriend. He liked your style and liked you for who you are but there's one thing that he did not like about you being a tomboy. Your friends. Your friends were rebellious and many of them didn't even like Jiyong or Big Bang. They were all against it and he was worried they might tell you to break up with him that's why he didn't like them. You were really sad because he wanted you to get new friends but your friends were all you needed and they were actually really nice. He found you sobbing in your bedroom. "What's the matter? Is it me? Did I do something? I'm sorry, I know I said some things that might be hurtful but I have so much work and I am so stressed... Please forgive me for me not being there for you..." He would feel horrible to see how serious you took that. He didn't mean to boss you around and tell you what to do but unfortunately, that's exactly what he did. He agreed to meet your friends to change his opinion on them and get to know them better. When you were having dinner together they bonded and they even taught him how to skate even tho you failed that mission a couple times.

Taeyang You knew Youngbae's  style is cute and sexy but not even near tomboy that's why you were worried why is he even holding onto you. You were worried he is only doing that so you could feel better about yourself. You couldn't think that was the case. While you were thinking about that in the living room he came home and found you all sad on the couch. He sat down and comforted you. "Hey~ What's up? Is something the matter? Tell me~~" He always tried to save everything by aegyo and he had no idea you were serious. When you started asking him why he is still with you if you're not even his type, he shook his hand and hugged you. He couldn't believe you thought you are not his type. He was impressed by everything you do and he loved giving you sweaters and other clothes and buy matching shoes that you both like.

Daesung He always liked girls who had the courage and don't dress extremely girlish. He was very happy he met you but you had some doubts about yourself. You thought maybe being 'tomboy-ish' isn't really your thing and that you should act cute and be more girl like for Daesung. You thought he might want another girl instead of you because you weren't dressed in sexy dresses and wore skirts all the time. "Hey, what are you doing? Let's play video games together... A-are you crying? What's wrong??" He thought it was really wrong for you to doubt who you are because of him.  He felt a bit offended because he would never do such a thing to you. He loved you and wouldn't exchange you for anything. He tried to cheer you up by promising you he'll play drums in his underwear again. You laughed and begged him not to and then you went out to get dinner together and then go for a walk in the park. 

Seungri You always liked your short hair and your black ripped jeans that fit perfectly with your sweater. You were proud on your strong absent liked to exercise with Seungri but since he was busy with his job a lot you couldn't do that often. When you went out with him to grocery shop or somewhere where you met his fans, they told him you look like a boy and how could he date a woman like you. Usually, criticism really got to you but now it finally got to you. "I'M HOMEE ~~ LET'S GO SOMEWHEREE ~~~ Uhm... Babe... What are you doing... Are you okay? Are you hurt? What is it? Tell me" It was the first time he's seen you cry. He was shocked and didn't know what to do because he didn't know why you were crying. You told him about the mean comments and he knew they would get to you at some point. Fans were great but sometimes some of them crossed the line. He hugged you and told you how much he loves you. It was hard to see you cry so he couldn't stop wiping the tears from your cheeks. He kissed your cheeks and told them to stay as beautiful as they are.

[donkeywrotewhat]

The Hurting, The Healing, The Loving: Part II- The Healing

“Hello? Yeah, yeah I know, I know and I’m sorry. I was just out and I was with friends and-“

“He knows. Yeah I made sure because the last time I didn’t he was really mad and yeah-“

“I’ll call you when I get home. Yeah you don’t need to worry, alright sleep tight, love you too Mani.”

 Lauren ended the call and tapped her fingers against the marble counter while she looked around her favorite coffee shop in Los Angeles. She looked at her phone’s watch and clearly the day was just about to start while she was about to head home after having a blast night with her friends whom she haven’t met a very long time.

 Alright folks I know I am probably late but this is the moment you have all been waiting for. Camila Cabello finally releases her latest single, Crying in the club video which has already 300,000 views! How rad is that?! I just recently listened to the audio and I am so excited for the video so pl-

 “Here you go ma’am one-“ The cashier held her breath. “You’re Lauren Jauregui.”

She smiled and didn’t confirm it. “Thanks for the drink.” She then turns around to leave but-

“Wait! I don’t know anything but you should listen to her music. It’s really nice you know.”

 She turns around and gave her a small nod and smile before heading towards her car. She places her drink in the cup holder. She sighs out in frustration and in annoyance and ran her hand through her hair. And just as she thought that she could just forget about what happened weeks ago but now she’s having an internal battle if she should listen to it or not. She closed her eyes to calm down for a second but her mind was playing against her.

“I have a song about us and I hope you can listen to it one day.”

“And when you do, I hope it hits you like a fucking train just so you can understand the half of the pain that I was going through.”

 “You know what, fuck this shit. I’m just going to get this over with.” She types in the words and pressed the very first video that appeared.

 Lauren taps her steering wheel but unlike the tapping she did against the marble counter, this one was more of an anxiety because she was getting impatient with all the waiting she had to suffer because the video was still buffering. She has never felt so impatient in her life. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the sound of the cello echoed through her car and she saw Camila walking in a very beautiful dress and her heart broke when she saw a tear fall on the younger Latina’s face when she started singing.

 Why did you leave me here to burn?

I'm way too young to be this hurt

I feel doomed in hotel rooms

Staring straight up at the wall

Counting wounds and I am trying to numb them all

Do you care, do you care?

Why don't you care?

I gave you all of me

My blood, my sweat, my heart, and my tears

Why don't you care, why don't you care?

I was there, I was there, when no one was

Now you're gone and I'm here

 I have questions for you

Number one, tell me who you think you are

You got some nerve trying to tear my faith apart (I have questions for you)

Number two, why would you try to play me for a fool?

I should have never ever ever trusted you (I have questions)

Number three, why weren't you, who you swore that you would be?

I have questions, I got questions haunting me

 I have questions for you, I have questions for you

I have questions, I have questions for you

 Lauren didn’t care about the other music as she immediately brings the small circle back from the beginning and listened to the entire things again. She looked at the girl in the screen and she felt her pain. She felt her regret, her anger, her sadness and every bit of negativity. She leans back on the chair and closed her eyes because she knew very well how this song was formed. It was her fault after all.

 “Lauren I am asking you a question.”

“And I am politely requesting you not to annoy the shit out of me.” She says coldly. “Can you please get change? Everyone’s waiting for us at the roof top.”

“Not until you tell me why the hell Lucy was here inside the hotel room, looking like you fucked her so well!”

“Because I did okay!?” She snaps. “She came here and apologized, Camz she went out of her way to say sorry to me where in fact she needs to be somewhere else right now. I couldn’t say no to her effort.”

“Lo, she cheated on you with your friend Keana-“

“They were both drunk and regretted what happened okay and I forgive them both for that.”

“C’mon Lo, you know she’s just messing with you. Open your eyes Laur! She doesn’t love you!”

“No Camila if there’s someone who needs to wake the fuck up, it’s you!” She was so angry at Camila right now. “You’re just saying shit because you can never accept the fact that I can’t love you and me never will love you the way I love Lucy and it’s fucking eating you.” She argues. “Wake up Camila,  if the management didn’t request for us to act like as a couple, I wouldn’t notice you. You’re crazy as fuck if you think Lucy who is an amazing person for someone like you because you’re not worth it, you’-“

Lauren was silent when Camila finally slapped her. “Fuck you.” She was also stunned at the amount of venom in those words.

“Thanks but no thanks Camila, I’ve got Lucy for that.” She knew it was so wrong to rub at her the reality but she was just offended. “You should just stay here, I can’t have any fun whenever you’re around.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be in my fucking hotel room so that I couldn’t burst your bubble.”

“Hey honeypie, where’s Camzie? I thought you were coming to get her.” Mike asked her daughter.

“I tried but she wanted to have marathon of FRIENDS. Plus, she easily gets cold.”

“Ugh, seriously that girl needs some social classes.” Dinah groaned.

“Let her be guys, I am pretty sure that she just wants to be alone.” Ally looked at Lauren and the green-eyed beauty looked away as if she knew what was going on. “C’mon let’s just enjoy alright?”

“Happy 4th of July bitches!”

  “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” Lauren said as she slams her fist against the wheel. “Stupid Lauren! How could you say something like that!?”

 She felt her tears on her cheeks and she immediately wipes them off before leaving the place. She was really driving in a faster speed, gripping on the wheel as hard as she wants to reach the place who can give her solace right now. She bit her nails as Camila’s lyrics struck her so hard and she couldn’t seem to get the memory out of her mind even if she wanted to.

She parked her car just outside before climbing onto the fence. Jumping on the other side, she messed up her hair again and started pacing back and forth like a lunatic before screaming her heart out. She needed something to calm her down and then she remembers her coffee but now she remembers that her coffee was inside of the car which was probably not so hot now and cold coffee can’t help to calm her down. She groaned in frustration and threw the very first thing that was on her hand which unfortunately was, her phone.

 “FUCK!” She screams in realization. “ Fuck, fuck, fuck. Oh what the hell it doesn’t matter anymore! Damnit!” She reaches something in her back pocket which was her pack of cigarettes and her lighter. “Fuck this shit.”

Just as she was about to light it up, someone spoke. “I guess old habits die hard huh.”

She was surprised to see Camila on the other side of the fence. “What are you doing here?”

The latter shrugs and started to climb on the fence which Lauren helped her with. “Thanks for that.”

“You’re welcome.”

“See, I told you old habits die hard.” Lauren was confused but then Camila looked at their intertwined hands so she removes them. “I was talking about your nails but it’s not like I was using it as an excuse to hold your hand because-“ Camila stopped when she heard Lauren chuckling.

“I get your point.”

“Biting your nails is a bad habit.” Lauren blushed out of embarrassment. “And by old habits, it’s about us going to this place whenever we feel like we can’t breathe.”

“That’s right.”

“But out of all the old habits you’re doing, this has gotta be the one I hate the most.” She pulls out the stick from Lauren’s mouth and threw it away along with the pack. “I would’ve included the lighter but I know it was a gift from your abuelito.”

“T-thanks for remembering.”

“You don’t need a raspier voice Lauren, it’s already amazing as it is.” That made Lauren blushed. “Although I really feel sorry for your phone.”

“How long have you’ve been there?”

“Enough to hear cursing for the rest of the year.” She chuckles. “No I wasn’t spying on you, you were just distracted because if you weren’t you would probably hear my engine. It’s not that hard.”

“Wow, so now you can drive now?”

“I needed to, I have no one to be on my side when I wanted to escape, I mean there’s Juno but you know she has some other things to do.”

“Look at you doing all the adults do.” Lauren decides to tease which Camila just rolled her eyes. “But it’s nice to know you can do things on your own.”

“It’s kind of weird seeing me be all mature and stuff, I may be 20 but I still feel like my 15-year old self.”

“And that’s good because if there’s one thing I love about you it’s your pure soul. I hope you won’t let them take that away from you.”

“You forgot that I am the biggest goof as well.”

Lauren chuckled. “That too.”

Camila smiled looking at her chuckling. “I remember the first time you took me here, I was scared to death and I remembered peeing in that spot.” Lauren was now laughing her ass off. “That wasn’t funny! You know it wasn’t every day for me to break the rules!”

“I’m sorry I just-“ Lauren wipes the tears in her eyes. “Laur, please let’s get back to the hotel what if someone sees us up here?” She says imitating Camila’s rant. “LAUREN MICHELLE JAUREGUI MORGADO THIS SHIT HAS GOTTA STOP! I WILL NOT CLIMB THIS STUPID FENCE JUST SO I COULD SIT ON THE CLIFF ABOVE THE HOLLYWOOD SIGN!”

“I am a Hispanic and the president might be considerate but if Obama sees us I’m doomed!” Camila adds to the memory.

“Well now Trump’s here, consider us deported.” Both of them laughed. “But you still went in for me, even though you’re about to pee in your pants.”

“I was scared as fuck but I still went for you because I know you needed someone. I was scared of what you might do, but mostly because I’m a sucker for cliché movies and I wanted to be your personal solemn place to be our solemn place, and that we get to call this place ours.” Camila says with a smile on her face. “Besides, I take every opportunity to be with you. And being the only person who knows this place will always probably be my only advantage when it comes to her or to him.”

“You shouldn’t compare yourself to them because neither of them could do the half of the things you did for me. So being the only person who knows about my solemn place isn’t the only advantage you have but for everything that you’ve done for me, for every pain and hurt you concealed just to hear me cry about someone else or how happy I am after every date I went.” She says. “I could mention a lot of things but we’ll probably going to be here for days-“ She chuckles “but out of all the things you did to me, one thing stood out and that was you, loving me so selflessly without expecting the same amount from me in return.”

“I just wanted to see the one I love happy. It was all I ever wanted for you to be because you deserve it.”

“And I should’ve known, I should’ve known that you were hurting that night and you were continuously hurting until you couldn’t take it anymore and then you left. You left them because I was hurting you and I wish I noticed it earlier so that I could make you stay, so that I could make you be- I just want you to be happy too.” Lauren was having another panic attack. “You had anxiety, depression and all the negativity and I was too blind to see that your were drowning-“

“Shhhhh, Lauren you need to calm down.” Immediately, Camila grabbed both of Lauren’s hand and kiss the back of it.”You were never the main reason why I left, I left because I wasn’t happy anymore, I was done being the management’s puppet and even though I need to hurt your feelings as well as the girls, I needed to because if I didn’t, I would lose myself and you didn’t want that, I didn’t want that to happen so I left. And for the words you said that night, I forgive you for it because I know you were only saying those things because you were hurt.”

“I didn’t say those things because I was hurt; I said those things because you were right. We were just using one another but still I didn’t let Lucy go, I said those things because I was scared, I felt like I was cheating on her whenever I am with you because she never pops out in my mind when you’re here with me, it felt so wrong but goddamnit Camila being with you feels so right, like I was meant to be with you and you were meant to be with me. I said those words to push you away because honestly, deep inside I was feeling things that I should never feel for you, but mostly because you deserve someone else.”

“Everybody kept on insisting that I didn’t deserve you but Lauren Michelle Jauregui, the heart wants what it wants and I want you, I’ve always wanted you.”

 Both of them looked at one another, thick tension filled the air within the surrounding until Lauren was the only finally surrendering. She brings the other one closer, gripping on her waist as she closes the distance between them. Feeling those plump lips against her own felt so familiar. Camila’s lips tasted happiness, sadness, pain, love, want, the yearning but most of all, her lips felt like home.

Camila’s hands were rested on Lauren’s neck as they kissed at a slow phase like slowly remembering the feeling of each others’ movement for they haven’t done this in a very long time. The older Latina felt the younger one licking her lower lip which slowly she opened to as they continue to explore each others’ mouth. When air was needed, both of them pulled away but kept their foreheads pressed together.

It was Lauren’s eyes who opened first and saw the tears streaming down on Camila’s face so she used her thumbs to wipe them off as she traces the lips that were on her own just a while ago. When Camila opened her eyes and met Lauren’s green ones, she finally got the courage to say the only thing she wanted to say.

 “I love you Camila, I love you and I probably always will.” Camila instantly hugs her tightly as she begins to sob. “Did you hear that? I finally said I love you.”

“Say it again.”

“I love you, and I’m sorry it took so long for me to say it.”

“Again.”

Lauren makes Camila face her and they looked at one another. “I love you Karla Camila Cabello Estrabao-Jauregui.” Camila jumped and wrapped her legs around Lauren’s waist which made her laugh. “I love you, I’ve always had.”

Camils drops herself and she trails Lauren’s facial features. “I like the sound of that.”

“I like the sound of that too.”

“I love the fact that you finally admitted it… However, I fucking hate your timing for saying it.” Her jaws clenched. “We both the idea of me taking your surname but I know it’s not the time for that yet. We can’t make it now because there are other people involved now.”

“But there were other people involved too in the past but that never stopped us right?”

“Because in the past that was the 16-year old me and the 17 year old you who never cared about anything but our own happiness.” She says. “Now we have to be the better version of ourselves.”

“I don’t want to do it, I want to be with you.” Lauren’s tears were threatening to fall. “I love you so much to lose you again. Camz please…”

Camila’s heart broke Lauren’s sad voice. “Those people involved now Lauren doesn’t deserve to be in pain because of us. Even though you won’t accept the fact, I know that you love him and you care for him because he was there for the times that I wasn’t. He’s a good guy and I care about her happiness too because I love her. I’m starting to trust in love again so I need to give myself a shot at finding happiness in someone else’s hands. She’s an amazing person Laur, they both deserve the love that we can offer to them. It may not be as equal as to how we love another, but that’s how we learn to love again.”

Lauren pressed their foreheads together as tears fell from her face. “Why do I feel like you’re slipping away from me again? Like you’re going to be out of my life for the second time around?”

“Because I am… I need to be out of yours and you need to be out of mine for the time being because the right type of love is never forced. If we’re meant to be together just like how we believe, then we’ll find our way back. We can’t continue to be together because we’ll be each others’ worst nightmares.” She tries to explain. “You wanna know why I named my album the hurting, the healing and the loving? It’s because it’s my stages of moving on. And this stage that we’re currently in Laur, is the healing stage. I need to temporarily close my chapter with you but at least I end it with me knowing that you love me… We’ve healed each other by saying how we really feel.”

“You said you had questions right? I know you have a lot of questions but I have the answers now. I can answer anything you want. I-“

“I think you answered all of them when you told me you love me.” She smiled. “Please stop being stubborn you’re being a pain in the ass now.” Lauren knew that Camila was only being playful to lighten up the mood. “Seriously though, I’ve got all the answers that I’ve been wanting to hear from you.”

Eventually Lauren nods her head in agreement. “If this is the price I have to pay for not being brave, then I’ll accept it. But I’ll wait for us, I’ll wait for our time, I’ll wait for us to re-open our story again.” She looks at the love of her life. “I hope it’s you and me in the Loving stage.”

Camila smiled warmly. “I don’t know but I am hoping it’s you that I’ll be seeing in my finish line of the healing stage. I want you to know that if we never find ourselves back to one another, it’s still okay. We’re allowed to fall for someone else, we’re allowed to end up with someone else.”

“That goes the same for you too. You deserve to end up with someone who appreciates you endlessly.”

“We both do…” They smiled.

“Good luck with the promotions, I know your album with be so dope because you’re a lyric genius. I can’t wait to hear the entire song on Sunday.”

“Promise me you’ll give your thoughts about it when we meet again?” Lauren nods, even though she’s unsure of the next time that they’ll meet again. “We should head back now, unless you plan on staying here?”

She thought about it for a moment before nodding her head. “I’m gonna stay for a little while but you should go, today’s a very busy schedule for you.”

Lauren helped Camila onto the fence as the younger one successfully made it on the other side. “You girls go rock on your next album. I’ll probably like some of the tweets about you girls and Roger will probably unlike them.” She rolls her eyes. “Typical, I should’ve known.”

“It’s okay, I know you’ll support us in your own ways.” She says. “Just be yourself alright?”

“I’ll probably kill all thinking that this album is going to be about boys because damn, I don’t remembering swinging that way.” Lauren laughs. “I mean it! Seriously, I feel like they’re shoving dicks on my throat-“

“Stop…” She laughed like there’s no tomorrow. “You go and do your thing butterfly queen 1.”

“Oh, the entire Camren world has probably recognized that song was for you, and I’ll probably acknowledge that Camren is real at one point-“

“And even though I’ll fucking deny it in the public, I want you to know that Camren is always real for me.” She smiled.

She smiled. “I’ll see you around.” And then she started walking towards her car.

“I love you Camz.”

Without looking back, Camila responds. “I love you Lo.”

 Lauren watched as she enters her car and drove away from the place. She looked back at the view and saw the sun started shining at the entire state and she smiled. Sure, it probably felt like hell because she just lost the one person that her heart beats for but there’s this one thing that she’s hopeful to happen.

That after the healing stage, no matter how long the two of them might take, they’ll both see each other at their own finish lines. And when they do, Lauren promises that she’ll love Camila right this time.

Alright! That’s a wrap everybody, I hope you guys like this one shot though, I’ve been meaning to write about Camren but my hands are tied to other commitments but I just wanted to share this short story with you guys, thank you for the support and let me know if you want the part 3 for this one and we’ll make it happen. :) See you around soon! Ciao!

[tammylovecams]

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"But if you keep downing that stuff like there's not going to be a tomorrow you're going to miss out on a little surprise I'd planned for later." "What surprise?" Bill asked as he put down his drink. "You remember Becky from our trip last year?" Jim whispered as he learned closer. "Becky....." Bill repeated as he searched his mind for the name. Jim made a quick popping sound as he opened his mouth into a O, then he closed it just as fast. "Oh Shit!, Becky" The 38 year old exclaimed as remembrance filled his eyes. "How could I forget....best fuck'n head in New York." Well she still works here in the hotel, I'm sure we can work out an encore performance of last year." "Fuck'n A!" Bill replied as he drained the last of his glass before slamming it down on the bar. Jim also finished his drink, taking his time to savor the taste. In his minds eyes he was also savoring the memory of the maid they had met on last years trip who was willing to put out for extra tips. The thought of her tight, experienced mouth wrapped around his hard cock brought a pleasing warmth to his groin. For a few bucks, they could both get their rocks off. Their wives kept a tighter rein on their spending than the company. As much as they'd like to, they'd never be able to hide the money they'd have to spend to get a hooker up to their room. Exiting the bar, they wandered into the Hotel lobby. They went up to the front desk and asked the desk clerk there where they could find Becky Carlson, describing themselves as old friends. The young man looked at the two of them for a few moments, then decided that the two well dressed men didn't look like kooks. He directed them to a small office on the other side of the lobby. When they reached it, the sign on the door read Domestic Services. Under it, in slightly smaller letters was the name, Rebecca Carlson, Assistant Director. They hesitated a moment, no longer sure that this was a good idea. Looking over his shoulder, Jim saw that the desk clerk was still watching them. "What the hell, nothing to loose." He thought as he rang the small knocker on the door. "Come in." Said a feminine voice from behind the door. Watching the door close behind the two men, the desk clerk went back to his business. "Can I help you gentlemen?" Rebecca Carlson asked as she looked up from the papers on her desk. Both men were taken aback for a moment. The woman in front of them barely matched the image of their memories. Rebecca was in her mid thirties with dirty blond hair. She was sort of plain, although each of them had recalled her as pretty. They also remember her as having enormous breasts, but failed to recall that she also weighed close to 160 lbs. Between the alcohol and the thrill of getting blown, they had both created a whole new woman. "I'm sorry, I think we made a mistake." Jim said as he tried to excuse themselves. "We were looking for someone who used to be a maid here." "Well I used to be one, I've only had this job for the last year." Becky said as she took a real long look at the two men. "Wait a second, I remember you two, about a year ago...right. Just before I got my promotion." "Er, yeh." Bill answered. "You'll have to forgive my not remembering you right away, gentlemen." Becky continued. "It wasn't like I performed that special service for every guest, but it was over a year ago." "Of course, we really didn't expect you to remember us." Jim said, trying to think of a graceful way to exit. "Oh really, then what may I ask are you doing here?" Becky said as she rose from her desk and walked around it to face the two. Each stood silent, not knowing what they could say. "Well how this for a thought." Becky said as she leaned back against the desk. "You're on your annual trip to New York and you have reason to celebrate. So one of you decides, why not find that maid from last time and see if you could get a few cheap blow-jobs like you did last time. Am I close?" The red shading of both men told her she had hit it right on the money. "Well sorry to disappoint you gentlemen, but that's not going to happen. "Of course, we didn't mean to imply..." Jim said. "Bullshit!" Becky laughed. "That's exactly what you meant to imply. But don't worry, I'm actually not offended. I kind of like the idea that you enjoyed yourself so much that you'd come back for another try." Both men felt a little relieved that they had gotten out of a very embarrassing situation. "Tell you what, what I will do is meet you in the bar in about twenty minutes and let you buy me a drink to celebrate my new job." To which Jim and Bill readily agreed. A half-hour later, Becky was sitting with Bill and Jim in an isolated booth in the far end of the bar. After a few drinks, none of them were feeling the least bit awkward about what had happened. "Too bad the hotel doesn't have a few more maids as dedicated to customer comfort as you were." Bill joked. "Oh we do." Becky shot back with a smile. "I really can't blame any of the girls for doing something that I've done myself." Both Jim's and Bill's eyes opened wide, perhaps the night wouldn't be a total loss. "Unfortunately, all three of them are off this evening." Becky finished. "Damn," Jim muttered. "But I do have an idea, although I'm not sure if you would be interested." "Hell, I'm so horny, I'd fuck a goat!" Bill said. Jim shot him an angry look. Drinks or not, that wasn't language you used in public. "Well, if all you guys are really interested in is getting your rocks off, we happen to have a really cute young man on the night shift who I happen to know is really attracted to, how shall I put it, older gentlemen." "A faggot!" Bill said. You want to send us up a faggot?" "It was just a suggestion." Rebecca replied. "I mean he is really cute, in a feminine way. And I'm told gay men really give the best head. "Well, forget it!" Bill snapped. Rebecca was about to get up to leave when Jim motioned her to stay. "Wait a minute, Bill." He said softly. "Lets not be too quick about this." "What......" Bill stammered. "You really want to think about this." "Lets just say it might be kind of interesting." Jim continued. "What the fuck, we're both grown men. You can't tell me you've never been curious about it." Bill looked at his friend. Deep down he knew he had indeed been curious about being with a man several times in his life, but he never would've had the courage to been the first to admit it. Instead the "fuck'n faggot" reflex had immediately shown itself.

"Then should I set something up for you?" Becky asked.

"Is there a way you could set it up but leave it that we could back out if it didn't feel right." Jim asked. "Hmmm." Becky thought. "You could wait until the end of his shift, that's at 11, and call down for some ice or something. Ask for Kevin. When he comes up, you could see if it feels right. If not, you can just thank him for the ice and send him on his way." "Not a bad idea." Jim answered. "I think we'll try it." He turned his attention from Rebecca to Bill and asked. Will "we" try it, or would you rather wait down here in the bar. Bill thought about it for a few seconds, then said. "No, "we" is right. Both Jim and Becky smiled. "Kevin, take a bucked of ice up to 234." The night manager said to the tall blonde bellhop. "Oh come on, Mike." The Bellhop said in a voice tinged with disappointment.

"I'm out of here in 10 minutes, can't Steve take it up."

"Sorry pal, they asked for you by name." The manager said. "Maybe they want to give you a special tip, it says on their card that they're checking out tomorrow. Some guests do that, so you don't think they stiffed them after you busted your ass doing stuff for them and they miss you at checkout." "Ok, boss." Kevin said, thinking that he didn't even know who was in 224, much less why they were requesting him personally. But a tip was a tip, every bit helped. "Hey, Kevin," the manager said just before the elevator doors closed. "When you're finished, just take the freight elevator down to the locker room. I'll sign you out at 11, that way you can make up some time." "Thanks." said the voice from the elevator as the doors closed tight "Room service." Kevin called out as he knocked on the door of room 224. The door opened to reveal a tall dark haired man who towered over Kevin's 5'6". Dressed only in a pair of boxer shorts, something Kevin didn't find that unusual this time of night, the man had a pretty good build for a man of his age, just beginning to show a layer of fat around his stomach. His chest was very hairy, black mixed with noticeable gray, making the bellboy think he colored his hair. As Kevin put the ice bucket down on the table, Jim took a moment to check him out. Rebecca had done him an injustice. The boy wasn't cute, he was gorgeous. He had short blond hair and a swimmers build that could easily been seen in his uniform, especially the way it hugged his ass. His eyes were a deep blue and his face was that of a teenage girl. Jim thought he couldn't be more than 18 or 19 - the fact was that he was 17. "Will there be anything else, sir?" Kevin asked as he turned to face the room's occupant. "Well, there is something I need taken care of." Jim said, "I really hope you'll be able to help out, I was told you were especially good in this area." "Well anything, I can do to be of service?" The bellboy replied, wondering what is was that the man was looking for and how much he could get out of it. "What ever it is, I'm sure I'll be able to take care of it!" "Ah, the ice is here." Bill said as he walked into the room wearing a bathrobe, fresh from the shower. "I was hoping you'd be able to take care of this." Kevin heard Jim say from behind as he turned his attention to Bill's entry. video chat xxx Snapping his head back, Kevin was greeted by the sign of Jim stroking a thick hard cock that was now sticking out of the fly of his jockey shorts. A small drop of precum appeared at the opening as the older man continued to stoke it, causing it to grow even thicker. Taking a large step forward, Jim stopped only a foot away from the boy - who now had his sights fixed on the exposed cock. "It's yours if you want it." Jim said. Kevin remained silent, but Jim could see a hungry look in his eyes. Rebecca had been right on the money about this boy. After a few moments hesitation, the bellboy reached out and replaced Jim's hand with his own. A wide smile filled his face as he ran his hand up and down the massive organ. "Why don't you get a little more comfortable?" Jim said to the young man as he reached out and began to unbutton the boy's uniform. A minute later, both Jim and Kevin were naked. Kevin ran his hand across Jim's hairy chest, obviously turned on by it's thickness. Jim, on the other hand was just as turned on by Kevin's lack of body hair. His skin was so smooth and soft, more like a young girl's than a mans. Jim eased Kevin down to his knees and brought his now engorged cock closer to his mouth. With a well practiced motion, Kevin took the offering into his mouth. As he watched his organ slide in and out of the boy's mouth, Jim felt a weakness in his legs. The kid was a better cocksucker than Becky. Already he could feel a familiar stirring in his balls. "Hey Bill," He called out. "Get over here and get some of this. This kid is fuck'n fantastic." Dropping his robe on the floor, Bill took his own cock in hand and offered it to the kneeing bellboy. Sliding off Jim's rod, he replaced it in his mouth with Bill's. "Shit!" Bill exclaimed after a few moments. "This kid can suck all right!" For the next ten minutes, the blonde haired youth switched from cock to cock, bringing each man close to climax, then easing off. Keeping a hand wrapped tightly around the base of each cock, Kevin could keep each man from coming too soon. "God, this is great!" Jim thought. "I thought I'd shoot my load in the first minute." As Kevin again took Jim's cock into his eager mouth, Jim couldn't help but now compare what was unquestionably the best blow job of his life with the reluctant ones his wife Karen had given him over the years. "Stupid bitch wouldn't even let me ever come in her mouth, not even after 16 years." He thought. As Kevin turned away from Jim and returned his attention to Bill's cock, Jim looked down at the smooth skinned youth and remembered something else Karen would never even consider. "Take care of our boy here." Jim said to Bill as he stepped away. "I'll be right back." As Jim vanished into the bathroom, Bill grabbed the back of Kevin's head and began to match his pelvic thrusts with the boy's own motions. The pressure around his cock was incredible. Like Jim, he couldn't believe he hadn't exploded yet. Not that he wanted to, if anything, he wished this kid would go on all night. Bill hadn't noticed Jim return from the bathroom until the older man broke the two of them apart and led Kevin over to the couch. The young man immediately saw the small jar in Jim's hand and smiled. "Ok?" Jim asked as took up a position below Kevin at the base of the couch. "Sure." Kevin replied with a grin. Bill took up a spot at the front of the couch and lowered his cock over Kevin's face. The bellboy was now laying stretched out along the length of the sofa. As Jim lifted the boy's legs up and rubbed a generous amount of Vaseline into his ass, Bill showed his cock back into Kevin's mouth. To Bill's delight, Jim's actions in no way prevented the boy from picking off exactly where he had left off. After covering his cockhead with another generous helping of gel, Jim placed it at the tightly closed anus and applied pressure. Kevin's legs were wrapped up and over Jim's shoulder's, giving the older man a great deal of leverage. A short shove opened the tight muscles and he slid inside. The sudden constriction was unimaginable. Even with the heavy lubrication, he couldn't see how Kevin could take his hardness. He's slid his cock about halfway in, wondering if he should just forget it when he felt Kevin pushing his body downward, trying to take him in deeper. "What the fuck." He thought as he took a firm grip on Kevin's soft buns and plunged in as far as he could. After the first few strokes he found it became easier and easier. Because the pressure was now constant and lacking Kevin's skillful hand to prevent it, he knew he would soon explode. Determined to finish with a bang as they say, Jim began ramming his manhood as deep and as hard as he could. Kevin was obviously enjoying it, he knew he was. Knowing that Jim would soon come, Kevin was no longer making any attempt to hold Bill back. He had already tasted the salty taste of his precum and was looking forward to the deluge that he was sure would follow. Sure enough, a few seconds later, his mouth was filled with a hot whiteness. Pushing his head upward, he swallowed it as fast as Bill could shoot. Except for the last load which he ran around the lining of his mouth with his tongue, savoring the taste. A few moments later, Kevin felt Jim's body tense, followed by a loud shout as the older man filled his anal cavity with his masculine juices. Jim was so exhausted by his efforts that he collapsed atop the boy. Bill also had been drained and fell back on a nearby chair. The clock chimed 12:30 before any of them moved. Kevin quickly dressed, declining the use of the shower. The sooner he could slip out of the employees entrance the better, that way he couldn't explain why he was still in the hotel after making a big deal over having to make one last room call. Jim met him at the door after pulling on his shorts. As he shook the bellboy's had, Kevin could feel a folded bill being pressed into it. Cams girl hot xxx free "You're Ok Kid!" Jim said with a smile. "Hope to see you the next time we come through here." When Kevin opened his hand once he was out in the hallway, he would find a fifty dollar tip. It was a lot more than Jim and Bill usually gave for such services but Kevin had been truly exceptional. What would their wives say when they went over the expenses for the trip? Jim thought about it for a second and then concluded......Fuck 'em.

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Whyte House Family Devotions #364 (05/20/18): “Complete Victory,” by Billy Graham

My family and I have had morning devotions, or family altar as some people call it, every day ever since my wife, Meriqua, and I were married 30 years ago. We have prayed and read the Bible together as well as other devotional books as a family, and it is the only reason why this family has stayed together, and the only reason why God has blessed our family and used our family in ministry all of these years. We read Ephesians 5 and 6 every morning as it relates to the role of each member of the family and how that we need to put on the whole armor of God to fight against the devil who is seeking to destroy our family and all Christian families, churches, and Christians. So, now after 30 years of doing this in our home, we are opening this up to others who don’t have a family to pray with, who don’t have a spouse, or who are single by choice, and to encourage all families who are still intact to go back to the family altar and have devotions together every morning. In these devotions, you may hear me deal with a temptation I’m facing in my life, you may hear me rebuke my wife about not doing what she should be doing, or you may hear me get on one of my children’s cases about something they’re doing. Don’t be shocked; this is real life.

SING “DOXOLOGY”

Praise God from Whom all blessings flow Praise Him, all creatures here below Praise Him above, ye heavenly hosts Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost Amen

Billy Graham said, “We should begin the day with the Bible, and as it comes to a close let the Word speak its wisdom to our souls. Let it be the Staff of Life upon which our spirit is nourished. Let it be the Sword of the Spirit which cuts away the evil of our lives and fashions us in His image and likeness.”

——

PRAY “THE NEW COMMON PRAYER”

Almighty and most merciful Father; We have sinned, and strayed from Thy ways like lost sheep. We have followed too much the devices and desires of our own hearts. We have offended against Thy holy laws. We have left undone those things which we ought to have done; And we have done those things which we ought not to have done; And there is no peace and joy in us. But Thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us, miserable offenders. Spare Thou us, O God, who confess our sins, our faults, and our failures. Restore those of us who confess our sins and repent; According to Thy promises declared unto us in Christ Jesus our Lord. And grant, O most merciful Father, for His sake; That we may hereafter live a godly, righteous, and sober life. To the glory of Thy holy Name. In Jesus Christ Name, Amen.

——

EPHESIANS 6:14

14 Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness;

Stephen J. Cole writes in his commentary on this passage: “What is truth? Truth is stable, firm, and reliable. The Hebrew word for truth was often used of things that had proved to be reliable. Thus it often refers to God’s faithfulness to His covenant promises. As the God of truth, we can put full confidence in His word. In the New Testament, Paul often uses truth to refer to the gospel message itself, which is reliable and must be trusted. For both Paul and Jesus, the truth often refers to correspondence between word and deed. John, who uses the words for truth in more than half of the New Testament occurrences, uses it ‘regularly in the sense of reality in contrast to falsehood or mere appearance.'”

——-

PRAYER

——-

DEVOTIONAL PASSAGE: Psalm 142:1-6

1 Hear my prayer, O Lord, give ear to my supplications: in thy faithfulness answer me, and in thy righteousness.

2 And enter not into judgment with thy servant: for in thy sight shall no man living be justified.

3 For the enemy hath persecuted my soul; he hath smitten my life down to the ground; he hath made me to dwell in darkness, as those that have been long dead.

4 Therefore is my spirit overwhelmed within me; my heart within me is desolate.

5 I remember the days of old; I meditate on all thy works; I muse on the work of thy hands.

6 I stretch forth my hands unto thee: my soul thirsteth after thee, as a thirsty land. Selah.

Regarding this passage, Matthew Henry writes: “We have no righteousness of our own to plead, therefore we must plead God’s righteousness, and the word of promise which he has freely given us and caused us to hope in. David, before he prays for the removal of his trouble, prays for the pardon of his sin, and depends upon mercy alone for it. He bemoans the weight upon his mind from outward troubles. But he looks back, and remembers God’s former appearance for his afflicted people, and for him in particular. He looks round, and notices the works of God. The more we consider the power of God, the less we shall fear the face or force of man.”

———

PRAYER FOR THE ESTATES 1. Family 2. Clergy (church) 3. Government 4. People (citizens) 5. The press (media) 6. New media/Online journalists

PRAYER FOR THE FAMILY

PRAYER FOR CHURCH LEADERSHIP

GOVERNMENT LEADERS

1 Timothy 2:1-2 says, “I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty.”

President Donald Trump and his administration Vice President Mike Pence First Lady Melania Trump Second Lady Karen Pence All White House staff including: Senior Advisor to the Chief of Staff Zachary Fuentes All leaders of federal agencies including: Chief Judge of the Court of Appeals for Veterans Claims Robert N. Davis All territorial governors including: U.S. Virgin Islands Governor Kenneth Mapp All city mayors including: DeFuniak Springs, FL, Mayor Robert B. Campbell All members of Congress including: Georgia Senator David Perdue All law enforcement officials including: DeFuniak Springs, FL, Police Captain Michael J. Lolley All military leaders including: Defense Secretary James Mattis / Office of Naval Intelligence Commander Robert D. Sharp Leaders of nations around the world including: North Korea’s Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un The peace of Jerusalem

PRAYER FOR THE PEOPLE / CITIZENS

PRAYER FOR THE MEDIA

PRAYER FOR CURRENT EVENTS AROUND THE WORLD

– For the comfort of the families of 8 people killed by a bombing at a cricket match in Afghanistan – For the comfort of the families of over 100 people killed in a plane crash in Cuba – For the comfort of the families of the 10 students killed in a high school shooting in Santa Fe, TX

PRAYER REQUESTS

Charlene please bless her and her family spiritually and financially and give her the right job where menopause will not interfere; heal her from menopause.

Sendy please encourage her husband, open up doors for their family business and meet all their business needs and give them favor with people

Harry please heal him from hyper thyroidism

Vicki please end the drought in parts of Israel; for Israel’s peace

THOSE WHO HAVE ACCEPTED CHRIST AS SAVIOR

Kobe Jeanette Sundara

THOSE WHO HAVE RECOMMITTED THEIR LIVES TO CHRIST

Fredrick Antony J. Baptiste

DEVOTIONAL READING: “Complete Victory,” by Billy Graham

1 John 4:4 says, “Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.”

“Paul once wrote, ‘For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary the one to the other; so that ye can not do the things that ye would.’ This is the battle or the tension that is present in us to a greater or lesser degree. So, you see, the spiritual lag that you feel is explained in the Bible. That does not mean that you accept it as the way it should be. You should make all necessary preparations for this battle which the Bible says ‘is not against flesh and blood, but against spiritual forces.’

“In Ephesians 6 we read that the Bible tells what preparation you should make. In the meantime, always remember that ‘where sin abounds, grace did much more abound.’ You can have complete victory! We are told to submit ourselves unto God, and the devil will flee from us. We are also promised that ‘sin shall not reign over us.’”

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Now, if you do not know Jesus Christ as your Savior, allow me to show you how you can place your faith and trust in Him for Salvation from sin and Hell.

First, accept the fact that you are a sinner, and that you have broken God’s law. The Bible says in Romans 3:23: “For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.”

Second, accept the fact that there is a penalty for sin. The Bible states in Romans 6:23: “For the wages of sin is death…”

Third, accept the fact that you are on the road to hell. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 10:28: “And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell.”

Now that is bad news, but here’s the good news. Jesus Christ said in John 3:16: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” Just believe in your heart that Jesus Christ died for your sins, was buried, and rose from the dead by the power of God for you so that you can live eternally with Him. Pray and ask Him to come into your heart today, and He will.

Romans 10:9 & 13 says, “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved… For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”

If you believe that Jesus Christ died on the Cross for your sins, was buried, and rose from the dead, and you want to trust Him for your Salvation today, please pray with me this simple prayer: Holy Father God, I realize that I am a sinner and that I have done some bad things in my life. I am sorry for my sins, and today I choose to turn from my sins. For Jesus Christ sake, please forgive me of my sins. I believe with all of my heart that Jesus Christ died for me, was buried, and rose again. I trust Jesus Christ as my Savior and I choose to follow Him as Lord from this day forward. Lord Jesus, please come into my heart and save my soul and change my life today. Amen.

If you just trusted Jesus Christ as your Saviour, and you prayed that prayer and meant it from your heart, I declare to you that based upon the Word of God, you are now saved from Hell and you are on your way to Heaven. Welcome to the family of God! I want to congratulate you on doing the most important thing in life and that is receiving Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour. For more information to help you grow in your newfound faith in Christ, go to Gospel Light Society.com and read “What To Do After You Enter Through the Door”. Jesus Christ said in John 10:9, “I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.”

Until next time, May the Lord Bless You!

[blackchristiannewswire]

LISTEN: Whyte House Family Devotions #350 (05/06/18): "Seek God For Yourself," by Billy Graham

https://soundcloud.com/danielwhyteiii/whyte-house-family-devotions-350-050618-seek-god-for-yourself-by-billy-graham

[caption id="attachment_40916" align="alignleft" width="156"] Daniel Whyte III[/caption] My family and I have had morning devotions, or family altar as some people call it, every day ever since my wife, Meriqua, and I were married 30 years ago. We have prayed and read the Bible together as well as other devotional books as a family, and it is the only reason why this family has stayed together, and the only reason why God has blessed our family and used our family in ministry all of these years. We read Ephesians 5 and 6 every morning as it relates to the role of each member of the family and how that we need to put on the whole armor of God to fight against the devil who is seeking to destroy our family and all Christian families, churches, and Christians. So, now after 30 years of doing this in our home, we are opening this up to others who don't have a family to pray with, who don't have a spouse, or who are single by choice, and to encourage all families who are still intact to go back to the family altar and have devotions together every morning. In these devotions, you may hear me deal with a temptation I'm facing in my life, you may hear me rebuke my wife about not doing what she should be doing, or you may hear me get on one of my children's cases about something they're doing. Don't be shocked; this is real life. SING "DOXOLOGY" Praise God from Whom all blessings flow Praise Him, all creatures here below Praise Him above, ye heavenly hosts Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost Amen Billy Graham said, “The time to prepare for life’s disappointments and hurts is in advance.” ------ PRAY "THE NEW COMMON PRAYER" Almighty and most merciful Father; We have sinned, and strayed from Thy ways like lost sheep. We have followed too much the devices and desires of our own hearts. We have offended against Thy holy laws. We have left undone those things which we ought to have done; And we have done those things which we ought not to have done; And there is no peace and joy in us. But Thou, O Lord, have mercy upon us, miserable offenders. Spare Thou us, O God, who confess our sins, our faults, and our failures. Restore those of us who confess our sins and repent; According to Thy promises declared unto us in Christ Jesus our Lord. And grant, O most merciful Father, for His sake; That we may hereafter live a godly, righteous, and sober life. To the glory of Thy holy Name. In Jesus Christ's Name, Amen. ------ EPHESIANS 6:12-13 12 For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. 13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stephen J. Cole writes in his commentary on this passage: "When Paul states that these evil forces are not 'flesh and blood' and that they dwell 'in heavenly places,' he means that they are not earthly creatures with physical bodies, but rather spirit-beings that are invisible to us. We do not know whether they can temporarily take on a human form of their own, as the righteous angels do, but it would seem reasonable to assume that they can. Demons can take possession of human personalities and bodies, creating disease and bizarre behavior, as many instances in the Gospels and the Book of Acts show. Their normal mode of operation is to work through unbelievers and through human religions, governments, cultures, media, and philosophies to further Satan's opposition to God. But the main point here is that they are real spirit-beings, not just an impersonal evil influence." ------- PRAYER ------- DEVOTIONAL PASSAGE: Psalm 137:1-4 1 By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Zion. 2 We hanged our harps upon the willows in the midst thereof. 3 For there they that carried us away captive required of us a song; and they that wasted us required of us mirth, saying, Sing us one of the songs of Zion. 4 How shall we sing the Lord's song in a strange land? Regarding this passage, Matthew Henry writes: “Their enemies had carried the Jews captive from their own land. To complete their woes, they insulted them, requiring of them mirth and song. This was barbarous and profane, for no songs would serve but the songs of Zion. Scoffers are not to be complied with. They do not say, How shall we sing, when we are so much in sorrow? but, It is the Lord's song, therefore we dare not sing it among idolaters.” --------- PRAYER FOR THE ESTATES 1. Family 2. Clergy (church) 3. Government 4. People (citizens) 5. The press (media) 6. New media/Online journalists PRAYER FOR THE FAMILY PRAYER FOR CHURCH LEADERSHIP - For all pastors, church leaders, denominational leaders, Bible teachers, missionaries, and ministry workers. GOVERNMENT LEADERS 1 Timothy 2:1-2 says, "I exhort therefore, that, first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks, be made for all men; For kings, and for all that are in authority; that we may lead a quiet and peaceable life in all godliness and honesty." President Donald Trump and his administration Vice President Mike Pence First Lady Melania Trump Second Lady Karen Pence All White House staff including: Deputy Director of Trade and Manufacturing Policy Alexander B. Gray All leaders of federal agencies including: Government Accountability Office Comptroller General Eugene Louis Dodaro All state governors including: Virginia Governor Ralph Northam All city mayors including: Cooper City, FL, Mayor Greg Ross All members of Congress including: Florida Representative Stephanie Murphy All law enforcement officials including: Cooper City, FL, Police Captain Robert Cates All military leaders including: Defense Secretary James Mattis / National Security Agency General Paul M. Nakasone Leaders of nations around the world including: Nauru’s President Baron Waqa For the peace of Jerusalem PRAYER FOR THE PEOPLE / CITIZENS PRAYER FOR THE MEDIA PRAYER FOR CURRENT EVENTS AROUND THE WORLD - For the comfort of the families of 7 people killed in a mining accident in South Africa - For the protection of the people of Hawaii who have been displaced because of volcanic eruptions - For the comfort of families and church family of the 26 people killed in an attack on a church in the Central African Republic. PRAYER REQUESTS Belinda please heal her Yossi please save him and draw him closer to You, for Your grace and favor in his life Dobson please bless him with the Bibles and resources he needs to further the Gospel in Africa THOSE WHO HAVE ACCEPTED CHRIST AS SAVIOR Estelle Janine Vitallis THOSE WHO HAVE RECOMMITTED THEIR LIVES TO CHRIST Hipoltus Sharon Yakubu DEVOTIONAL READING: “Seek God For Yourself,” by Billy Graham Psalm 100:3 says, “Know ye that the Lord he is God; it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves...” “Whenever anyone asks me how I can be so certain about who and what God really is, I am reminded of the story of the little boy who was out flying a kite. It was a fine day to go kite-flying, the wind was brisk, and large billowy clouds were blowing across the sky. The kite went up and up until it was entirely hidden by the clouds. ‘What are you doing?’ a man asked the little boy. ‘I’m flying a kite,’ he replied. ‘Flying a kite, are you?’ the man said, ‘How can you be sure? You can’t see your kite.’ ‘No,’ said the little boy, ‘I can’t see it, but every little while I feel a tug, so I know for sure that it’s there!’ Don’t take anyone else’s word for God. Find Him for yourself, and then you too will know by the wonderful, warm tug on your heartstring, that He is there, for sure.” - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Now, if you do not know Jesus Christ as your Savior, allow me to show you how you can place your faith and trust in Him for Salvation from sin and Hell. First, accept the fact that you are a sinner, and that you have broken God's law. The Bible says in Romans 3:23: "For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God." Second, accept the fact that there is a penalty for sin. The Bible states in Romans 6:23: "For the wages of sin is death…" Third, accept the fact that you are on the road to hell. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 10:28: "And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell." Now that is bad news, but here's the good news. Jesus Christ said in John 3:16: "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." Just believe in your heart that Jesus Christ died for your sins, was buried, and rose from the dead by the power of God for you so that you can live eternally with Him. Pray and ask Him to come into your heart today, and He will. Romans 10:9 & 13 says, "That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved… For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved." If you believe that Jesus Christ died on the Cross for your sins, was buried, and rose from the dead, and you want to trust Him for your Salvation today, please pray with me this simple prayer: Holy Father God, I realize that I am a sinner and that I have done some bad things in my life. I am sorry for my sins, and today I choose to turn from my sins. For Jesus Christ sake, please forgive me of my sins. I believe with all of my heart that Jesus Christ died for me, was buried, and rose again. I trust Jesus Christ as my Savior and I choose to follow Him as Lord from this day forward. Lord Jesus, please come into my heart and save my soul and change my life today. Amen. If you just trusted Jesus Christ as your Saviour, and you prayed that prayer and meant it from your heart, I declare to you that based upon the Word of God, you are now saved from Hell and you are on your way to Heaven. Welcome to the family of God! I want to congratulate you on doing the most important thing in life and that is receiving Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour. For more information to help you grow in your newfound faith in Christ, go to Gospel Light Society.com and read "What To Do After You Enter Through the Door". Jesus Christ said in John 10:9, "I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture." Until next time, May the Lord Bless You!

Daniel Whyte III has spoken in meetings across the United States and in over twenty-five foreign countries. He is the author of over forty books including the Essence Magazine, Dallas Morning News, and Amazon.com national bestseller, Letters to Young Black Men. He is also the president of Gospel Light Society International, a worldwide evangelistic ministry that reaches thousands with the Gospel each week, as well as president of Torch Ministries International, a Christian literature ministry. He is heard by thousands each week on his radio broadcasts/podcasts, which include: The Prayer Motivator Devotional, The Prayer Motivator Minute, as well as Gospel Light Minute X, the Gospel Light Minute, the Sunday Evening Evangelistic Message, the Prophet Daniel’s Report, the Second Coming Watch Update and the Soul-Winning Motivator, among others. He holds a Bachelor’s Degree in Theology from Bethany Divinity College, a Bachelor’s degree in Religion from Texas Wesleyan University, a Master’s degree in Religion, a Master of Divinity degree, and a Master of Theology degree from Liberty University's Rawlings School of Divinity (formerly Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary). He is currently a candidate for the Doctor of Ministry degree. He has been married to the former Meriqua Althea Dixon, of Christiana, Jamaica since 1987. God has blessed their union with seven children.