#Man even TC's fed up of him

[chara-55]

Winter isn't his favorite season

[gayskogul]

Wip snippet

Thank you for the tag, @renaultphile I have to admit that I'm not working on any writing for TC right now, sorry girlies, but I am working on something just as homosexual! It's the story of a young Paladin-in-training, and the fledgling Cleric who has been made to tutor him in the ways of the magic. So, stay tuned if you like fantasy and knights and magic and homoerotic devotion! I've a bunch of chapters written already but I'm not keen to start uploading bits until I have a whole act ready to go, but I plan to start posting these stinkers up on Ao3 very soon! Anyway, this is a snippet from an early scene that I quite liked.

[5-ish mins reading time]

“It’s really quite a simple trick,” said Arthur, spreading his cloak out underneath him on the tree stump. “We learn to do it early on in our training. You just have to open yourself up, and really…” Arthur noticed a wave of confusion sweep across the other man’s face. “You can feel the Light, can’t you?”

Oliver bit at his lower lip. He nodded, after a moment. “I think so, yes. Sergeant Wheatley—the practice instructor, that is—said that I wield it in combat. But off the training field…”

“Nothing?”

Oliver pushed a brown lock of hair back from his face, a twinge of frustration in the gesture. “Not even a glimmer.”

Arthur took the leaf that had fallen from the poplar branches above them, then held it in his hand, palm up. He focused for a moment, reaching out for the Light, then let it wash over the leaf. With a barely audible puff, it floated a couple of inches above his outstretched hand.

“Do you see it?” asked Arthur. “The Light.”

Oliver craned his neck, eyeing the leaf warily, as if it was some monstrous enemy upon the battlefield. After a long silence, he murmured, “No.”

Arthur felt his heart sink into his stomach. Had the Order made a mistake? The leaf did a sudden nose-dive, plummeting as the spell fed off of his momentary doubt. But he bolstered the enchantment, steadying it before it could drop to the floor and become lost amongst the foliage. “Look closer. Try again.”

Oliver shifted closer, leathers creaking as he bent down at the waist. “Hold on…” he breathed. He squinted at it for a moment, then nodded. “It’s hard to see, but yes, I think that’s it! Little threads of… is that the Light? You can really see it?”

“Good,” said Arthur, relief making the word come out sounding choked. For most people, those would not be visible. Not that they were visible per se, but those with some attunement to the Light were able to sense it. It was a sixth sense of sorts. Oliver’s ability to perceive them meant that he was indeed familiar with the magic, and had most likely been told the truth that he’d used it in his sparring, and most importantly, this wasn’t a waste of time for everybody involved, the poor lad included. 

Arthur released the spell. The leaf flopped back onto his hand. “Now that you saw how it’s done, have a go."

Oliver stared at the leaf. His brows knit together in concentration, and he pressed his lips together so forcefully that they went white. A minute passed. Then another. A crow called in the distance, and was answered by a flight of unimpressed-sounding wood pigeons.

Long-held breath exploded out of him. He turned away rigidly. “I can’t.”

Oliver looked like he’d just been in a fight, all tense and coiled up like a spring. The sight made Arthur frown. That just wouldn’t do, he thought, idly running a finger across the edge of the leaf.

“It’s alright. Not everyone gets it right away.” Arthur put his chin into his hand. He rolled the stalk between the ends of his fingers. “Let’s try something else. What do you know about spells?”

A blank look was all the only response he got.

“I see. Then have you ever managed to purposefully channel the Light?”

Oliver shook his head glumly. “I don’t think so.”

“What about when you’ve done it whilst fighting? When you use it then, how does it feel?”

“I’m not sure. But when I’m paired up with some of the other recruits—the ones who cheat, or fight dirty, or the ones I know that bully the younger boys, everything feels… different.” Oliver sat up straighter. He shook his head, as if clearing it of cobwebs. “Each step is more certain. Each sword form feels like it’s always the correct one to use, like... like it would be impossible for it to miss. Winning the bout would be something pure and correct. I think that might be the Light: searing hot and sharp, and full of purpose!”

The words were stirring. They'd made Arthur inadvertently lean closer to the other man. He subtly clawed himself back into a more relaxed posture before Oliver could notice. Of course, the answer sounded like one a paladin would give, and certainly some of the more zealous priests too. But there was more to it than that. The Light could be burning hot, but it could also be a soothing warmth. He wondered whether Oliver had realised that, surrounded as he was by people who were so devoted to the art of battle. His gaze swept across the newest bloodstain on the squire’s trousers, and an idea came to him.

“Hold out your hand,” said Arthur, “the one you pricked on the briarthorn.”

Oliver gave him a curious look, but obeyed. Slowly, he reached out his hand and uncurled his fingers, one by one. They were long and knobbly, and his thumb jutted out awkwardly. There was still a spot of bright crimson at the tip of the ring finger, and a darker patch where blood had mixed with the dirt on his hand and dried there.

Arthur had proved that Oliver could see the Light. Now it was time for a different experiment. “Alright. Close your eyes,” he said.

“What are you up to?” asked Oliver warily.

“Do you trust me?”

There was a long moment of silence. Grey eyes flicked up to bore into him for what felt like an eternity. Eventually, Oliver cocked his head slightly and said, “I do.” He shut his eyes. Thick lashes caught the sun.

Arthur brought his heels to the tree stump below him, using the motion to counterbalance leaning forwards to reach out to the other man. “In a second,” he said quietly, “I’m going to touch your hand, if that’s alright.”

“Understood.”

In the soft, calm voice that he reserved for the more delicate procedures, Arthur continued. “After that, I’m going to try something. I want you to focus on how it feels.”

Oliver hummed an affirmative.

“Alright. No peeking.”

By now, Arthur had cast healing spells countless times throughout his training, on many hundreds of different people. But this time, for the first time in years, he was nervous. It could have been some reticence at calling upon the Light to heal so superficial a cut—it was indeed wasteful to heal such a small pinprick. Or perhaps some lingering anxiety from being uprooted from his home so suddenly and sent across the continent. It could have been a fear of upsetting the young paladin again and wiping away the softness that had spread across his face when his eyes shut, and looked so at-home there. Regardless of its cause, healing magic required a particular state of mind to be effective, and the way his pulse had decided to quicken was not helping.

He took the outstretched hand. When his fingers brushed against Oliver’s palm, a tremor run through the other man.

“Sorry,” said Oliver, smiling. “I wasn’t quite expecting it yet.”

“Oh. Apologies.”

“It’s alright. Go on. Please.”

If one were to observe the elegant skin of Oliver’s face, his neck, and his arms, one might be convinced into believing that his hands would be just as fine. This was not the case. In fact, it was quite the opposite. There were bumpy calluses on his palm, hardened little hills and valleys worn into his hand by years of hard work, and recently long hours of combat drills. It was undoubtedly a strong hand, but it had an unspoken gentleness about it. The paladin's hands were quite pretty in their own way, he thought.

Despite his trepidation, it only took a moment for Arthur to reach out to the Light. He was very practised at it by now, after all, and it took little effort to open himself up and let the radiance fill him. He focused his efforts down, and pushed them gently onto the little snag on the skin of Oliver’s finger pad, where another crimson teardrop had blossomed. He imagined tiny threads of the Light and willed them to weave the skin closed. It took a couple of seconds to take effect. He knew it had worked, because Oliver’s brows rocketed upwards, becoming lost behind his fringe.

“You felt that?”

“Uh-huh,” replied Oliver. His lips remained parted slightly.

With his thumb, Arthur wiped the drop of blood away from the cut. The skin underneath was perfectly whole. “And?”

“I see what you mean. It went all warm, like a good blanket, or… or like sitting right at the edge of a campfire. I didn’t know it could be like that.” Oliver cracked open his eyes, looking directly at him.

Arthur shifted on his seat under the weight of that gaze. He looked away. “Good as new,” he said, dropping the hand quickly. He rocked back on his tree stump, suddenly eager to put distance between them.

Oliver flexed his hand, wiggling the fingers. “Yeah. Thanks,” he said, touching the spot where the cut used to be.

“You’ve never felt the Light like that before?”

“No. Not like that. It's beautiful. How do you…?”

“It takes some… getting used to."

-------

[lillxart]

Since I've been doing some Snow White oc asks I thought I'd do asks for Hi'rem!

!!!!!!

WARNING: MENTIONS OF RAPE AND NSFW

!!!!!!

Alone: Not well. As a Thalmor Lieutenant for around one hundred years the life that Hi'rem used to have has been sucked out of him. Now he's a bitter and sadistic imitation of himself. When he's alone all he can think about is hurting himself or hurting other people. He tries to stay around others to keep up the facade of himself, but he finds his fellow Thalmor more insufferable than himself.

Betrayal: You know, that's a good question! I'm not sure if Hi'rem ever had a personal betrayal before, or if adding one in his teenage years would give him any merit character wise. But in general terms, the ideals of the Thalmor Dominion have betrayed him and he never recovered.

Bound: Hi'rem was imprisoned and tortured during the Great War for a brief period of time. His bravado and love for his country got him through it though. His scars were all healed, but he wishes he kept them and has Snow White scar him up in their place.

Break: The thought of losing his drug Snow White will break him down mentally. Only Snow White, Lydia, and Argis have ever seen Hi'rem at that point and truly know who he is on the inside.

Desire: I think the one thing Hi'rem wants more in the world is to both die and live. Both desires he has without realizing them. He wants to live, to be happy, to feel joy and have hope. But at the same time he's so fed up and exhausted that he just wants to die.

Failure: His greatest failure would be going too heavily into spoiler territory I think, so I'll do a lighter failure. During the war his boyish eagerness to serve his country cost his best friend his life.

Fear: Looking in the mirror and seeing what he's become. Hi'rem is afraid of himself. He knows it, Snow White knows it, Lydia and Argis know it. When Hi'rem is confronted with himself he'll verbally and physically lash out. Maybe even murder.

Future: Hi'rem already gets the worst ending in my story :D

Ghost: His best friend dying used to haunt him to the point where he'd take drugs to avoid the feelings. But eventually they started causing hallucinations of him and night terrors, so now he doesn't feel anything in that regard. The guilt of accidentally killing his best friend has all but evaporated.

Guilt: Other than what was just mentioned above, Hi'rem occasionally feels guilty about how poorly he treats Snow White.

Hate: Hi'rem hates himself more than anything else, but he also deeply hates Teldryn Sero, Elenwen, and Ondolemar. He's had multiple fantasies of raping Elenwen and choking the life out of her. For spoiler reasons I won't get into. Hi'rem hates Teldryn Sero because he views the dark elf as a superior version of himself, a goal he can never reach, and the kind of elf Snow White deserves to be with unlike him. Hi'rem hates Ondolemar for similar reasons also related to Snow White. He doesn't think Ondolemar is a superior version of himself, but he is jealous that she fell in love with him. Even though he does many things to help nurture Snow White's relationship with Ondo, he's cursing it the whole way through.

Heartbreak: Take a WILD guess :D

Hide: Hi'rem often hides his true feelings, viewing them as unimportant. Plus he's worried his true emotions will screw up his relationships and get in the way of things. He'd much rather suppress how he feels.

Hunt: I wouldn't say my golden elf boi is hunted by anything.

Mask: Yes.

Midnight: Hi'rem sleeps like a log for a man wearing a facade half the time. Being fake is exhausting! Though there are occasions where he stays up, but that's mostly when he's either plotting to kill someone or he's with Snow White and basking in the afterglow of one of their 'sessions'~

Mistake: I'm not sure, actually!

Monster: Oh Hi'rem's a monster make no mistake.

Nightmare: Used to have nightmares about his best friend dying because of him. Now he just doesn't dream.

Pain: Hi'rem: "Tch tch tch~ Now that's between me and my little Snowkitten~"

Secret: For a long time Hi'rem didn't want others to know how psychopathic he was, not caring if any of his fellow Thalmor lived or died. But now he doesn't care.

Skin: He has no skin deformities, and the above explanations cover this I think for the most part. He takes out a lot of his self hatred and violent tendencies on Snow White though.

Torture: Snow White: "H--Heheh~ He tortures me sometimes~ >v<"

Hi'rem: "Hmmm~ Only if you're a good girl and ask me nicely~"

Wound: Worst physical wound was getting his back scorched by a fire blast (third degree burns). Currently, though, Snow White's been giving him some wonderfully nasty scratches with her claws.

@ladytanithia

Since you like hearing about oc stuff and to give you more bg on Hi'rem :>

oc asks: not-so-nice edition

alone: How does your OC deal with loneliness? Have they ever been completely alone before? How do they act when there's no one around to see them?

betrayal: Has your OC ever been betrayed by someone they thought they could trust? Has your OC ever betrayed someone who trusted them?

bound: Has your OC ever been imprisoned or captured? What happened? How did they get out? Did the experience leave any scars?

break: What would cause your OC to break down completely? What do they look like when that happens? Has anyone ever seen them at their lowest?

desire: What's one thing your OC wants more than anything in the world? Are they open with that desire? Why or why not? What would they do to fulfill it?

failure: What's your OC's greatest failure? Have they been able to move past it? Does anyone else know about it?

fear: What is your OC's greatest fear? What do they do when confronted with it? Are they open with their fear, or do they hide it away?

future: What's the worst possible future for your OC? Are they taking steps to avoid that outcome? Are they even aware it's a possibility?

ghost: Who or what haunts your OC? What happened? How do they live with their ghosts?

guilt: What is your OC guilty about? How do they handle their guilt? Do they try to avoid guilt, or do they accept it?

hate: What does your OC hate? Why? How do they act towards the object of their hatred?

heartbreak: Have they ever had a relationship that ended badly? Experienced some other kind of heartbreak? What happened?

hide: What does your OC hide? Why do they hide it?

hunt: Who or what is your OC hunted by? A person, a feeling, a past mistake? Is your OC able to let their guard down, or are they constantly alert?

mask: Does your OC wear a mask, literally or figuratively? What goes on beneath it? Is there anyone in their life who gets to see who they are under the mask?

midnight: What keeps your OC up at night? Do they have nightmares? Fears? Anxieties? What do they do in the small hours of the morning when they should be sleeping?

mistake: What's the worst mistake your OC ever made? What led to them making it? Have they been able to fix it? How have they moved on?

monster: Is your OC monstrous in any way? Is there something that makes them monstrous? Are they aware of their own monstrosity? Do they accept it or reject it?

nightmare: What does your OC have nightmares about? How do they deal with their nightmares? Do they tell people, or keep it to themself?

pain: What's the worst pain your OC has ever felt? Do they have a high pain tolerance?

secret: What's one secret your OC never wants anyone to know about them?

skin: How comfortable is your OC in their skin? Do they grapple with anything that lives inside them—a beast, a curse, a failure, a monster? How do they face the smallest, weakest, most horrible version of themself? Are they able to acknowledge it at all?

torture: Has your OC ever been tortured? Would your OC ever torture someone else?

wound: How does your OC handle being wounded? Are their wounds mostly physical? Mental? Emotional? What's the worst wound your OC has ever experienced?

[aajjks]

TC!Junngkook

Oh shit! Jungkook, you scared me nearly to death! What are you doing up? Hey… Calm down baby, I’m okay. Breathe baby, Jungkook breath. I was just worried about you. You have been acting stranger ever since you received that letter this morning and since you have refused to tell me what it said, I can to find out for myself. I couldn’t find it but I was about to come back to you. I’m sorry for scaring you baby. I thought I would have had enough time to come and find the letter before you woke up. We can talk in the morning, let’s just go to back to bed. I promise I won’t leave your side without telling you. I’ll never do it again. Please don’t be mad at me for worrying about you. I’ve never had this much fear over losing you. Normally you’re always in control or at least always could at pretending everything is okay, this time you’re not. It’s obvious something serious was said to you but I’m not use to being this worried. I’ll make it up to you- I swear. Yes, let’s go back to our chamber now.

*As Yn and Jungkook make their way back to their chamber, lighting struck one of its brightest strikes of the night. If only the little lamb and her protector had stayed behind long enough to witness the outline of a man behind the Kings office curtains. Right next to the long forgotten empty closet. The couple arrive at their chambers and craw into bed. This time the King makes sure his Queen is asleep before shutting his eyes. This time though, he’s unable to fall asleep. He couldn’t shake the fear of Yn being taken right from under him. Heart still beating from the fear and adrenaline. Between thinking about the man harming his wife and the fact that he, himself almost harmed her… He couldn’t sleep. He wonders if this is the hurt the man wrote about. Is he playing mind games? Does he want the Jungkook to go insane? Or is he trying to make him so paranoid he is the who hurts Yn? By the time morning comes, the King is still wide awake. Knowing he needs to get up and figure out a way to catch this bastard he gets up and gets ready to start the man hunt. But not before waking the Queen up. She will remain by his side every second of everyday until they catch this man. Maybe even long after aswell. The King and Queen arrive down to the kitchen to retrieve their breakfast before their meeting with Dace about the patrols of last night. Normally the King skips on it since he wakes up so early and begins work immediately but for his Queen, she must eat her meals and take care of herself. He checks daily to make sure she’s ate her food down to how much water she drinks. She has always been his number one priority. Jungkook and Yn have assigned plates that were hand crafted just for the two, as a way for everyone to know who gets fed first and in case the royal leaders want something special made just for themselves. Jungkook took his normal jet black plate with scrabbled eggs and toast and some apple juice. Yn grabs her pastel pink plate with pancakes and cut up bananas along with her milk. They decide to eat their garden away from everyone else.*

I really am sorry about last night Jungkook. I didn’t mean for you to become that scared.You’re the one he’s after and I just wanted to know why. The guards didn’t tell you were I had went did they? Well actually, I didn’t tell them where I was going. I don’t think I did at least. Well, what’s your plan? These pancakes are so good. I think they’re a new flavor. Here baby, try some. Do you have a way to track him down? Jin and Yoongi said he stayed down by the bakery right? The cooks. I love them, I cook with them all the time. But back to what I was saying, they saw him right? Or at least who they were suspicious of? Well, there’s something I have to tell you about last night… Uhm… Hold on… I just… I can’t breathe- Right now… This milk- It takes different… I think-…

*Queen falls unconscious dude to the lack of oxygen. Unknowingly, the milk she just drank was hazelnut milk. Hazelnut is banned from the palace from how badly the Queen is allergic to it.*

It’s a new day so Jungkook doesn’t really feel like bringing up the events that took place last night, it shouldn’t have happened, but he apologized for it and like the good girl you always are for him we just went back to sleep.

Yeah, he might’ve stayed awake to make sure that you did but it was worth it. Whenever he’s near you, he feels like he can breathe. And especially ever since someone has threatened to hurt him in the worst way possible and the only way to do that is to hurt you..

He knows that threat was for you.

And right now he feels a little calm because you are both in the garden, eating pancakes, and the flavor is delicious but he doesn’t really feel that hungry, he will not calm down- not unless he catches that bastard.

“Oh yn sweetheart I’m so full I can’t eat anymore- yeah what is it that you wanted to tell me though? Ahh… umm wait is everything OK? YN?!!” he calls out your name but you just lose your consciousness but before you could hit the ground, he catches your head and now you’re laying in his lap while he’s freaking the fuck out screaming out his lungs

Jungkook calls for the physician and the guard guards, but soon he takes away the glass of milk from your hand and suddenly everything clicks, so to confirm his doubts he sniffs it.

“GUARDS!! who the fuck brought this milk to her-“ he is screaming and he knows how much you hate him when he does that but right now you’re literally unconscious and it’s like his worst nightmare is coming to life.

Jungkook is running with you in his arms like a maniac, his guards are following after him, and one has gone to fetch the physician

“WHO THE FUCK gave Hazel nut milk to the queen and when everyone of you knows that the queen is allergic to it?! WHO DID?! I WANT THEIR HEAD!”

[mamourland]

Kissing Prompts #2 & #46 - Magnum/Higgins

Prompt #2 - A small, fleeting kiss which is immediately followed by a passionate, hungry kiss.

Prompt #46 - A lingering kiss before a long trip apart

Context: 2x01 - No Abby though 

Rating: Teen

Magnum grabbed a beer from the bucket of ice, hesitating between celebrating the solve of his case or cheering himself up after comforting poor Charlie who had learned that his wife, not only cheated on him, but had also been an accomplice in a bank robbery.

 He sighed as he sipped his beverage.

 ‘Guess you never really know what goes through someone’s head, even when you’re close to them.’, he thought. ‘Speaking of not knowing what’s going on in someone’s head…’

 “Where’s Higgy?”, he asked, looking around to try and find the young woman.

 “She said she’d been down in a few minutes.”, Kumu answered him.

 Rick made his announcement about him wanting to change jobs for something a little more meaningful. Thomas understood his friend wanted to find meaning in his job because that was all he ever looked for in his P.I job himself. That was why he hoped Higgins would accept his partnership offer because his P.I work always seemed more fulfilling with her by his side.

 “Hello, everybody.”

 Thomas turned his head towards the greeting and was faced with British Higgy. Like when little girls had Barbies with all their accessories, British Higgins came with a power suit and the ever popular tan Burberry trench coat to protect herself from the big bad London rain on her way to the office.

 He tilted his head when he met her eyes. It was an odd wardrobe choice for a meal at Robin’s Nest. Magnum felt his stomach drop, he had a bad feeling about this.

 TC offered her a beer and she answered that she had a plane to catch, and hold on a minute, where was she going? His friend actually beat him to it when he asked her that very same question.

 “London.”, was her answer and of course she was going there since she was dressed like she was on her way to a meeting in the City.

 He stayed silent while everyone was expressing their concerns about her leaving. Everything made sense now - her call log full of entries with a foreign number, the way she kept stalling her answer about their partnership – she was bailing on him to go back to the MI6.

 She told Kumu she would be back in a few days, but would she really?

 When the guys told her goodbye and she turned her heels to leave, he snapped out of his daze. She couldn’t leave like this! She didn’t say a word to him, hell she didn’t even look at him.

 “I’ll be right back.”, he muttered to the others before he followed her retreating form.

 He called her to catch her attention and when she turned around he placed his hand on her arm.

 “What’s going on in London?”, she asked her.

 “Family matters. Nothing exciting.”, she said lightly.

 ‘Yeah, right, that was what you usually wore when flying 20 hours to a family meeting.’, he thought.

 “Horrible liar.”, he said instead, giving her the opportunity to come clean.

 “Liar?”

 She seemed intent on playing dumb and they didn’t have all day for this conversation so he addressed the elephant in the room, well garden.

 “You’re meeting with MI6.“, he stated.

 “MI6?”, she questioned and Magnum knew she was messing with him so he called her on it, fully determined to get some answers.

 She sighed.

 “Okay, walk with me, I need to get my suitcase before my Uber arrives.”

 When they reached the entrance of the main house, he saw a big black suitcase and suddenly he wondered how much time she would be gone. He pulls on her arm to make her face him.

 “They want you back, that’s why you’ve been having trouble committing to our partnership.”

 “Yes, it seems that since I took part in the Viper arrest, they agreed to review my case and give me another chance.”, she explained with her eyes cast downward. “But I’m just going there to hear them out. I owe them that much. In a way, they’re my family still.”

 “You have a family here too.”, he advanced and he sounded whiny, even to his ears.

 “I know that, Thomas. But once I’ll have all the information, I will be able to make a decision.”

 Magnum’s heart clenched. Of course, she would stay in London. For every reason he gave her for staying and working with him, what sane woman would choose to investigate missing cats with a man-child dragging her everywhere in a red Ferrari in exchange for live poultry or baked goods as opposed to serving her country while being a spy for one of the most prestigious agencies in the world?

 He was not going to think too much about the odds of that one.

 But Thomas Magnum was nothing if not persistent and he had one last argument up his sleeve he decided not to play out to try and make her stay. However, it seemed like it was his last chance to do it.

 He took her hand in his, waiting for her to meet his eyes.

 “Maybe, this could help you make an informed decision.”, he told her softly before closing the distance between them to brush his lips against hers.

 He felt her stiffen slightly before relaxing under his touch. He decided not to deepen the kiss as it was merely a gesture to show her how he felt about her and not a way to satisfy his urges.

 When he moved away, he was surprised to feel her hands cup both of his cheeks to keep him in place before she pressed her mouth back to his, this time more firmly. He moaned softly and moved his lips slightly, trying to nip on her lower lip. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck and suddenly she was all over him: her tongue in his mouth, her hands in his hair and her upper body sinuously trying to rub against his through all the layers of clothes as she devoured him.

 Magnum groaned as he slid his hands underneath her trench coat to still her undulating hips because if she kept that up, he would never let her leave the property.

 They broke apart, out of breath, and he had some trouble keeping his grin from his lips when he saw how flushed she was, the rosy color stretched across her cheeks.

 “It’s getting quite hot, isn’t it? I think I’m wearing too many layers.”, she panted as she started to move away from him.

 He tightened his hold around her waist to prevent her from leaving him right away.

 “You’re always hot, but I have to agree, you’re wearing way too many clothes.”, he grunted as he began to dive for her mouth again.

 She stopped him.

 “Wait! What does this mean, Magnum? This kiss, why did you do it now?”

 He sighed.

 “I know we don’t have a lot of time to talk about it, but to keep it short, it was me attempting to show you how I feel about you and what’s waiting for you when you come back, if you’re interested that is.”, he said and waited a few seconds before voicing his concern. “You’re coming back, right?”

 She cups his cheek again.

 “Of course, I’m coming back.”, she answered vehemently before fusing their mouths back together. “And I’m very much interested.”, she insisted.

 He flashed her a toothy grin, elated by her response.

 “I can’t wait to continue what we started when you come home.”, he whispered against her lips. “I have a search party to launch.”

 She frowned, not understanding what he was telling her.

 “Your tattoo.”, he groaned. “I’ll have to scour every inch of your body in order to find it. Preferably with my mouth.”

 Her breathing quickened when her phone interrupted them with a chime.

 “My Uber is here.”, she regretfully announced. “But you know what, hold that thought about that search party until I’m back.”

 She reached for her suitcase but Magnum beat her to it.

 “I’ll walk you to the gate.”, he said as he offered her his other hand.

 She took it and they were off.

 “You know, I could have driven you to the airport.”, he declared.

 “It’s better this way.”, she sighed. “I’m not really comfortable with goodbyes at the airport.”

 “You’re right, it’s too crowded to do that.”, he claimed as they arrived at the front gate.

He pulled her body flushed against his and thoroughly kissed her. If they were to be separated for a few days, he wanted her to think about that kiss every time she missed home. She responded to his embrace, unwilling to leave him until the Uber driver got fed up and honked at them.

[the-unconquered-queen]

So my last ask got me thinking about the concept of forced LIs and I started to type a little, but it turned out to be longer than I anticipated and I swear it wasn’t meant to be a lukewarm take essay, so I’m not even gonna put it in the tags. It’s just gonna be me sorta “thinking out loud” on my blog. I’d put a read more, but mobile is mediocre. 🙂

We were talking about our man Liam, so let’s start off with him. The way I see it, the entire premise of the story is a royal romance (I know, could I be more redundant?), so it is assumed from the get-go that Liam is the LI, and the story doesn’t actually make sense if MC isn’t his queen. Thinking about it, who cares if some minor duchess gets kidnapped as opposed to the woman about to become queen? If you were Cordonian and saw the king promise some commoner’s (possibly the child of two born commoners) kid the crown, then proceed to have children of his own, and still let the rando’s kid be queen when the rightful heirs are literally right there, would you even accept that kid as your monarch? The only thing I find is that Liam should have been gender customizable (since as we’ve seen, Cordonia never cared about two women marrying), but then it wouldn’t make sense for MC to be the pregnant one in TRH, but they weren’t planning for TRH when they created his character for TRR, so there’s that. The plot of TRR/TRH hinges on marrying Liam and neither the premise nor the title mask it. Hell, even look at MC’s wardrobe. Why would this minor duchess be wearing crowns or an outfit like the ivory gown with the cape from TRH 2? Whether they should’ve tried to make the narrative be more logical for other LIs, that’s probably a given. The best bet would’ve been to go through with their original idea of separate epilogue books, but I see how that would’ve been more expensive than a single, separate series, which is no doubt the best move for them to make more money.

The difference is LIs that I feel are actually forced. For me, the definition of that is an LI that MC is written as being attracted to despite that romance not being plot-relevant. It’s not the same as a main LI (most books have one, and some include Aisha from BP and Dom from TC&TF). For example, no part of the premise of Open Heart, a story about being a doctor (not marriage), suggests that Ethan, MC’s mentor, should be the LI, because it doesn’t make a dent on the plot of the story, therefore there is no reason for the countless interactions, the creepy kitchen scene (that was changed, but still written in the first place), or how MC continues to wish Ramsey would look at them the way he used to, when if you never romanced him, implies being looked at the way he looked at them when he pinned them by their wrists in the kitchen and implied they have sex, worse still when MC is seeing someone else, so why are they pining after him?

Another example of an LI I think is forced in a sense is Nate from Sunkissed, but it was mainly in like one scene. I’ve got nothing against LIs who have a crush on MC regardless of their interactions. Damien and Sloane from Perfect Match, for example, confess to MC, but unless you choose to bring it up again, they don’t. They simply drop the issue if you choose to not reciprocate. Nate, however, asks MC on a date, which is a diamond scene. Turning down the date, however, does not result in a firm “no”, or “I’m not interested in you”. Instead, the dialogue makes it seem as though that particular moment was not the best time, but MC would be open to going out with him another time, which I saw the wlw side of the fandom be uncomfortable with when that chapter aired.

A lot of people say Beckett was forced, and you know what? Fair. I definitely agree he had way too much screentime, which was easy to get fed up with. However, unless I didn’t see any screenshots to contradict me, MC never expressed interest in him if you didn’t choose for them to. The choice was there, but it was yours. What Beckett was, was a forced friend, as you don’t get to choose whether he’s in your Pend Pals or hangs out with MC often, but we never really get to choose who MC befriends or cuts off (Tyler and Abbie, anyone?). The weird thing about Beckett was him showing up shirtless at MC’s door and the tutorial making a suggestion about positions, which was literal, because yoga, but also had innuendo that easily would’ve made people who didn’t play his route uncomfortable. He got way too much screentime, which was super unfair to other LIs’ stans (a moment of silence for the Aster romancers), but at least MC didn’t seem to pine after him the way OH MC seems to pine after Ramsey despite being with another LI.

And the last example I’m gonna mention for a forced LI is Chris Powell. This one’s briefer, but MC did seem to have a forced attraction for him, despite the player being able to confirm that MC’s canonically a lesbian (unless I’m misremembering). Every character was always like “so what’s the deal with you and Chris” *nudge nudge*, which was really annoying if you also had another LI. The first time I played the book, I romanced him, so I thought it was because of my choices, but when I replayed it for Zig, damn was Chris forced.

So since this was originally gonna be something brief, it’s not an essay, so it doesn’t have a conclusion, I’m just gonna say that if anyone overheard me shouting this into the void, well, feel free to join the discussion (though this isn’t meant to spark a big debate) or mention some detail I missed or misremembered, ‘cause this was really off the top of my head.

[disappearinginq]

Really? You're still hung up on comparing Magnum and Higgins to your famaily even though that annoymous poster explained to you, over and over, all the ways you're wrong? Being sarcastic and insulting someone is not the same thing as being sarcastic to express affection. You're b-i-l is a dick who picks on your sister's insecurities and makes her feel worthless. Higgins pokes at things that Magnum is secure in, like his intelligence, because she knows there's no chance of him being offended

(2/3) I have family and friends in the UK and every single time you ignore all the evidence to the contrary and insist that Higgins is this awful toxic creature, you're insulting every one of them. Honestly? You're just as bad as the shippers you profess to hate, only, where they insist there's non-existant romantic feelings, you insist there's non-existent offense being given. None of the men are bothered or upset by her sarcasm. They've made room for her in their ohana. They adore her.

(3/3)

And she has killed, and nearly died, to keep Magnum safe. That's not the sort of thing someone would do for someone they don't give a flying fuck about. You seem like a really intelligent person and I just don't understand why you insist on ruining this show for yourself by clinging to this wildly incorrect first impression instead of letting your opinion develop the way her character and relationship with the three guys has.

Oh, there is probably some etiquette where I’m not supposed to stoop to your level and ignore this with a “toddle off” and a peace sign so that I can be the more sympathetic in this conversation, buuuuuut.  I am not the kind of person. So. One, sit the fuck back down, buttercup. From here on out, you’re Exhibit Fucking A why I goddamn despise shippers. And here’s the biggest one: do I come in your space at all? Do I, oh, I don’t know, specifically go and find you assholes, just to pick a fight on anonymous, like a goddamn coward? No. I don’t troll fics tagged with Miggy, telling the authors to fuck off an die (which you lot have done to me). I don’t go onto a server and bitch them out to others (which you lot have done to me) and then incite people to come and go after the people who don’t share my view (WHICH YOU LOT HAVE DONE TO ME. DO YOU SEE A FUCKING PATTERN, YOU GODDAMN TWAT WAFFLE?) So you know what, fuckwit? Drop dead. Come off fucking anonymous so people can see who you really are. Be brave, you little insect. And I swear to fucking christ almighty, your little bitch ass better not come back with ‘I don’t have a Tumblr account, so I can’t boo hoo). 

Two. Vix and I are friends. Unless you can’t read and interpret the English language, which you seem to do just fucking fine, you would see that. In fact, you can credit her why I try really hard to rationalize some of Higgins’s behavior (and then either dipshits like you, or the writers themselves, make it impossible and I have to remember Vix and her wonderful insight). In case you didn’t fucking read, she is also the one who commented on the utter horse shit story lines we’re being fed, so there goes your leg to stand on. We had our discussion, we came to a shared, fascinating insight that the other one had to offer, and she’s the reason I leave anonymous commenting on, because as much as I would love to set you on fire, I love hearing from her more. So pitter pat, jackass, back to your hidey hole. 

Three. I’m sure I could be much more eloquent about telling you just how much I despise you on a fundamental level, but I am actually too fucking pissed off. But good news - you’re apparently pretty confident in your position, so this won’t insult you when I call you a cowardly ass - unless, you’re on anonymous because I have you blocked, which means you wanted this.  “ I have family and friends in the UK and every single time you ignore all the evidence to the contrary and insist that Higgins is this awful toxic creature, you're insulting every one of them.”

 - I’m sorry, but do you even see the fucking irony in this. Oh BOO GODDAMN HOO, a person complains about a character and shit fucking writing from the show because they have her character fucking weave back and forth like a goddamn weeble wobble, and they get personally offended and I should stop because their feelings are hurt second hand? That’s basically what you’re saying - I hate this character, and therefore I hate them. If they behave like Higgins, you’re probably not wrong, but what the hell do they care what I think - someone who has never met them? That’s what we’re drawing from this. In the same complaint that you have that I IDENTIFY WITH THEM, BUT IT’S WRONG ACCORDING TO YOU BECAUSE IT’S NEGATIVE? Eat shit and die. What I hate about the writing is that if you say fucking boo to Higgins, she canonically pouts for a whole fucking episode instead of manning up and using her not insignificant vocabulary. When it was someone else who needed less than legal means to get into this country, she refused to help, but now when it’s her turn, oh fine let’s break some federal goddamn laws. When a character, or a person, can’t take what they dish out, that’s the definition of a hypocrite. When the rules are played different to benefit a white person over a brown person, that’s white privilege. And eventually, you have to fucking learn to not be an asshole - even John Watson hits a threshold and punches Sherlock in the face for being a douchebag. 

Four. My sister is in fact incredibly intelligent. She holds duel bachelors of science, and a masters in technology and is a card carrying member of MENSA. She is very confident in her intelligence. But being told repeatedly that you’re an idiot, it’s a wonder you can speak your own language, how could you be so dumb, you’re lazy, you’re freeloading, you’re whatever, but then turn around and be like ‘why would you be insulted? Obviously I didn’t mean it!’ that’s fucking gaslighting. 

Five. HOW WOULD WE KNOW HOW THE GUYS FEEL ABOUT HER SINCE THEY’RE ROUTINELY NOT EVEN IN THE SAME GODDAMN STORYLINE AS HER AND MAGNUM?!  You wanna know what though? I want to like Higgins. I do. Because when the writing isn’t fucking terrible and making her out like a classist bitch, I love her. When she’s cracking jokes at the poker table? When she’s losing at pool with TC and Rick? When she’s got that funny little smile on her face because she’s so proud she surprised Magnum when she came to get him with the guys when he was stuck down in Triple Frontier? In the episode where they’re on the bus tour and she is the one who offers to go and confront the woman to tell her that her new husband is dead because she takes one look at Magnum and sees that this hits a little too close to home? I love her. Because the writing isn’t terrible, she’s actually human, and it isn’t a story line that isn’t one of the worst tropes to ever exist (really, did you miss the three thousand memos of I hate romance and romantic sub plots and tropes? Fake dating, fake marriage, I literally hate all of it, and they just made it worse by having it make no sense whatsoever in the narrative other than to play Shipping Bingo check off) I actually like her. 

And then some little shit like you comes along, and I go right back to hating her, because of the things you choose to ignore, and the things you choose to defend. If you don’t have to acknowledge her faults, I don’t have to acknowledge her strengths. TL;DR? Eat a dick and die, Nonny fuckwit. 

[teamdoesminecraft]

Everything about the pokemon au is perfect... is there lore???

oh you know me of COURSE there’s lore

It’s all kind of tangled together and hard to explain right now, so this post is gonna be a little less narratively-written and a little more expository. but as always, shoutout to @crystalfloe​ for being my partner in crime in developing this!

Some of the Ninetales dex entries say that it “came into being when nine wizards merged into one.” Naturally, we took this and ran with it: you know how illusioners are a sort of “secret mob” in Minecraft that were never actually implemented? Hundreds of years ago, in this lore, nine illusioners (possibly the last of their kind) met together in secret to preserve themselves. After a lengthy process of spellcasting, all of them gave up their physical forms and agency to create a new, pokemon spellcaster: Seto. Seto is his own person, not a conglomerate of nine, and he never really feels that he’s not; sometimes, though, when he argues with himself, it feels like there’s nine voices in his head all with different opinions. Being based on a kitsune and also having access to magic and curses in this AU still, he can shapeshift/illusion himself into a nearly human form-- he can’t/won’t get rid of the tails though, ever.

In these hundreds of years ago, Seto did some travelling, and his illager background eventually brought him to a wooden mansion. He lived there for a while, learning new magic under an evoker, and developing a gradual distaste for most other “humans” because of everything negative the illagers had to say about it. One lone adventurer, though, as they always do, stumbled upon the mansion, and found their way inside. Many illagers were asleep at this point in the night, but Seto wasn’t; he was the one who “greeted” the intruder firsthand. Said intruder wasn’t the nicest person either; they lashed out and tried to grab Seto’s tail to hold him down in a fight.

More Ninetales dex entries will tell you that “grabbing one of its tails will result in a 1,000-year curse on you and your descendants.”

Said adventurer lived and died uneventfully after that, but their descendants bore the burden. Sneaking around at night, looking to steal from illagers, and digging their way through the frostbitten winter woods, the family line was cursed with Weavile aspects; the original adventurer was doomed to slowly become one, even losing their mind in the body. Their bloodline wasn’t quite as unfortunate, but became a version of werewolf; were-weaviles, technically. Looking at too much moonlight at any one time causes them to transform and be mentally “replaced” by a far more animalistic version of themselves.

That’s why SSundee wears his glasses; they block out any excess moonlight. Of course, on the full moon, he has no choice but to close every curtain, because at that point there’s just too much to avoid. SSundee lives a rather quiet life, running a pastry shop in a no-name village, keeping his transformations to a minimum. He somehow inherited the original map that led to the mansion in the first place; he keeps ahold of it just as a reminder to not go there, ever.

SSundee’s got a friend, though, who’s willing to do anything for easy money.

Husky took the map, and ignoring SSun’s protests as just standard-SSun-paranoia, went to find the mansion to dig up any potential treasure there. Once inside, he was pursued by illagers, and fell between the walls; in the darkness, he reached for what he thought was a rope. It wasn’t, of course, and Seto had a whole new curse to lay. Husky had never been a fan of rain, surfing, or even baths as much as showers; Seto thought it would be the funniest thing to ruin the experience for him even more. (do I really gotta specify what pokemon Husky is) Husky’s started down the path of slow transformation, with an extra wrench in the formula; if any part of him gets touched by water, that part takes on more kip-like traits until he dries it. He found out while using SSun’s shower, and blamed it on him like it was some sort of shitty prank; when SSun wasn’t open about what he thought happened, Husky threw the door open.

It was a full moon that night (because of course) and Husky was terrified for a short while (because of course), running as far as he could. SSun, before he lost it, was even more terrified, because as far as he knew Weavile were nothing but predators; he doesn’t know much about Weavile, though, and what he neglected to learn was that Weavile are pack bonders, and that he had already built up a strong friendship with Husky. In summary, Husky spent that night trying to avoid being force-fed dead sandshrew by this terrifying demonic weavile that was also still somehow the mom friend.

BACK TO SETO, he has 1 (one) friend who isn’t an illager: a fellow troublemaking fox. Lox is a lonesome zorua who somehow wormed his way into the mansion (because doesn’t everyone eventually) and learned how to control his illusions by watching Seto in secret. Lox uses these illusions, generally, to fuck with people; it doesn’t help that Seto finds it absolutely hilarious. Eventually, Lox learned to create his own individual human form to cast, and learned sign language; he set out on his own just to explore, planning to find more people to mess with. Lox eventually discovered a small cottage in the woods, and was ready to just completely ruin this person’s day by unveiling that Deep Pokemon Magic--

--but True was, unfortunately, already a pokemon fanatic.

Even disregarding Tepig and Zubat, True tends to a bazillion wild pokemon, all the time, constantly. He’s invested in learning everything he can (scientifically) about how they work, especially their ties back to humans. (True is, in this AU, the one person who would be 1000% on board with being part pokemon, and also the one person who never will be.) When Lox tried to mess with him by impersonating people, True immediately recognized him as a Zorua, and tugged him inside for interrogation. True was relentless in his efforts to understand, poring over books, tests, and learning sign language to communicate with Lox better. Lox eventually mentioned that he didn’t want to be pinned down to one location, and didn’t plan on living forever in True’s little house; True realized this, of course, and waved him off, saying Lox was free to go wherever he wanted. Once away, Lox realized that though he liked the outside, he had enjoyed his time with True almost just as much; now Lox looks for any excuse he has to come back, and pops in from time to time for no reason.

One big excuse to come back, of course, is discovering another human-pokemon anomaly; when Lox saw a man with golden horns quietly using telekinesis to steal a lunch in a market square, he intercepted him and led him all the way back to the cottage. Sky was, understandably, confused and a little distressed; eventually after True sat him down they were able to have an actual conversation.

Sky’s history is (surprise surprise) Mary-Sueish. He’s a shiny hoopa (the only hoopa, so technically nobody knows he’s shiny?), and in this world, all legendaries have the ability to form-shift between pokemon and human. He was created by two other legends-- Notch (Arceus) and Herobrine (Giratina) to assist in preserving/expanding/helping the world. They both act as sort of guides for him in this AU, with neither really being evil or omnipotent. After creating Sky, they realized that while he was powerful, he had no experience in the world; they set him in a mostly-human form and instructed him to travel the world, meeting new people, and understand how humans and pokemon interacted and got along. They also, via a certain amount of magic, prevented him from saying what he or his history was; they didn’t want anyone finding out about the legendary child and trying to kidnap/control him. One notable ability of Sky’s is wish-granting; Hoopa being based on a djinn, we had to give him the magical bullshit. He can only grant one a day, though, in total, and he has plenty of restrictions on them-- no time travel, changing things that already happened, etc, etc. 

While Sky couldn’t tell True any of his actual history, True has been helping him learn more about his abilities and is 100% willing to travel with him anywhere to learn more about him.

SPEAKING OF NOTCH ARCEUS did you know he had a bastard son?? And that son was Xephos? YEAH THATS RIGHT TC/YOGS CROSSOVER AND I DONT GIVE A SHIT

Respawning doesn’t exist in this AU, so the yoglabs complex serves a real purpose via the cloning machines. Xephos doesn’t actually know he has any Arceus genes in him; they’re locked away and not apparent at all. That’s not why we’re looking at yoglabs right now, though: we’re here for Bajan.

Backtracking once again, Bajan grew up in a relatively decent-sized village, watching Wizard of Oz (Poke-Oz?) and absolutely loving the Infernape character. When he was about eight, his village was raided by pillagers; he had to run, as fast and as far as he could. Eventually he stumbled into the mountains, and up to Xephos and Honeydew, who were conducting a relatively boring test compared to normal, and YES i’m saying that Bajan’s gay dads are from the yogscast, nothing matters anymore

Bajan was adopted into the compound and was a very curious and energetic child. So curious and energetic, in fact, that he stole a transformation talisman and used it without calibrating it first; he passed out and was given two weeks to live, with his human DNA in constant conflict with the over-abundance of non-specified Pokemon DNA. Not wanting to support child murder, Xephos developed a particular method that he severely hoped would prevent Bajan from dying; he had Bajan pulled out of his safety-fluid-tank for a few hours so he and Dew could talk to him. They explained the procedure and asked if he had any requests-- Bajan still loved Infernape, so that was the first thing out of his mouth.

In the experiment, of course, they had to use Chimchar DNA to more closely match Bajan’s youth, but the procedure worked; he was given a very specifically calculated transformation talisman to wear to prevent him from becoming unstable again. (He was a little miffed that he had been given the “baby” form, but hey, what could you do.) Bajan lived for the next few years as a poke-human hybrid in the labs, generally being a good, if destructive, kid, practicing his firey abilities. On his birthday, he committed a small act of mischief; he lied to Dew and was able to go outside the labs for the first time since he got there.

Bajan fucken loved the outdoors, because who wouldn’t, and went running around way past his curfew before he got lost. While lost, he stumbled upon an absol-- Jerome had been on the run for as long as he could remember, because of the human superstition of absols causing natural disasters. After enough poking and prodding, Jerome eventually agreed to lead Bajan back to the vault door; on the way back, he locked up and refused to move. Bajan followed his gaze and realized that Jerome had sensed an avalanche before it could even begin-- there was no way they were going to outrun it. Bajan positioned himself between the oncoming snow and his new friend, and put every effort he could think of into spitting out the most powerful flamethrower he ever would--

--and he evolved. Bajan had never realized he could evolve before, and spent the next five minutes in complete and utter glee before yanking Jerome back to the labs to show off his new form and his new friend. The yogs weren’t as excited as he was to bring an absol into a place prone to nuclear disaster; he was grounded for lying, staying out past curfew, and the aforementioned absol-napping; Xephos took a mild amount of pity on Jerome, though, and agreed to test whether or not he was actually the cause of natural disasters. Eventually, when nothing really proved that he was, Jerome was allowed to talk to Bajan again-- at which point Jerome asked Bajan to translate his request to the yogs. 

Jerome had lived his life being unable to enter human society, even as a pet, because of the superstition around absol; seeing Bajan, a healthy and happy human-pokemon hybrid, had give him an idea. As Bajan translated, Jerome himself wanted to be a hybrid, so he could talk and interact with people. Xephos, though skeptical, was never one to turn down a scientific opportunity, and eventually was able to complete the procedure. Armed with a new half-human friend, a newly evolved form, and an advanced understanding of maturity, Bajan approached both Xephos and Dew one night with a request: he wanted to go outside the labs, with Jerome, and explore the world on his own to participate in battles. Eventually, they conceded; Bajan was abso-fucking-lutely ecstatic, and so was Jerome, to be travelling with someone for the first time ever. They currently roam the world as a duo, picking fights and having fun.

The entire team will eventually meet up, either through Sky’s wish-granting, Bajan and Jerome’s roaming, or Lox’s people-hunting; maybe a combination of all three. From then on they can travel the world together, working hand-in-hand to discover new things about each other and help one another as some of the only of their kind in this world.

Xephos, however, still sits in the labs, working on understanding pokemon in a much less communication-based way than True. Every time he re-clones himself, some piece gets lost, sending his mind into a darker spiral... it’s only a matter of time before he discovers his locked Arceus genes, and uses them in a way he definitely never should have.

[hemellassie]

Restless Days and Restless Nights *(*(*)*)*

Ch. 8 *(*(*)*)*

Photographs and Memories Pt 1

*(*(*)*)*

Rick shot up his bed, crying out, "Thomas!" He angrily swiped the tears from his eyes, followed immediately, by a shudder at the memories he'd just revisited in his nightmare.

God, what had triggered that particular memory? He despised that memory with a passion. Oh, now he remembered what triggered it. Well, shit on a shingle...time for a midnight visit to Magnum...why wouldn't Thomas ever just admit when he needed a helping hand? Rick knew he wasn't going back to sleep anyway, so he got up and dressed quickly. Grabbing his go bag, he went into the bathroom and washed his face then grabbed the 'special liniment' Shammy had given him to try, made sure the lid was on tight and added it to his go bag. Slinging the bag's strap over his shoulder, he headed out to his car in the parking lot to get going. He thought about giving TC a call, but decided this was his penance to pay, so why disturb the big guy? He had a tour at sunrise tomorrow.

That thought resolved, Rick slung the go bag into the backseat of his Porsche and began the drive to Thomas' place. Hopefully, he could get to the guest house without Higgy noticing...she didn't have to know every time he was there, did she? That's why he and TC each had their own codes. He drove towards Robin's Nest just over the speed limit until he escaped the city confines. Once out on the H3, he floored it. He'd pay the damn ticket if they caught him. He needed to get there and see just how much damage Thomas had actually done to himself this time. The needle on the speedometer crept up as he drove along the road. *(*(*)*)*

Earlier the same evening...at Robin's Nest

*(*(*)*)*

Magnum ambled out of the guest house, hands in the pockets of his swim shorts, whistling an off-key tune.

"Magnum, where are you going?" Higgins's voice, rather stridently, demanded.

Thomas paused in mid-step and turned towards the main house, reluctantly walking towards Higgins who was quick stepping towards him. They met in the middle. Kumu was behind her, making warning faces that seemed to indicate 'Don't rile her up; she is not in a good mood.'

"I'm heading out to go swimming, Higgy," Thomas replied in a calming voice.

"It's rather late for that, surely."

"Higgins, I've gone swimming in total darkness before and it's a good hour before sunset. I won't be gone long."

"Pardon me, if I am not certain, I believe that. I've known you to bloody well be out there three hours on your little swims. You are recovering from a concussion. I don't think you should go swimming without a swim buddy."

"Look, MOM, I'm a big boy...and a former Navy Seal. I have gone swimming with gunshot wounds, with concussions far worse and far fresher than the little knock on the head I got the other day, with broken limbs. I can handle myself out there." Magnum was getting a bit irate.

"Thomas, I'm merely concerned. Wait a moment. Why are you holding your shoulder so funny?"

"Huh? I'm not. I got hit in my head, not my..."

Juliet reached out and squeezed his shoulder and TM dropped to his knees, his face contorted in pain. She looked down at him. "You were saying?"

"Damn, Higgy...what the hell?"

She bent over and helped him up grabbing the other shoulder. "Come over here, right now!" She took him to a nearby lounge chair and pushed him down onto it. "Now, off with your shirt."

"We haven't even dated yet, Higgy." Kumu mimed slapping her own face and then his...mouthing, "Don't make her angry, you won't like her when she's angry." Thomas couldn't help the smirk that tugged at his lips.

Higgins slapped the back of his head lightly. Thankfully she missed the still tender part back there. "This isn't funny. Shirt! Off, now!"

"Okay, okay..." Thomas realized she wasn't going to take no for an answer and began unbuttoning his shirt. His shoulder really did hurt. He hadn't noticed it before this. What was going on? It was where his old injury from the camps was. Why was that acting up? He heard a horrified gasp from Higgins. "What, what's wrong, Higgins?" He started to turn his head to try and see what she was staring at so aghast, but she pushed his head back facing forward.

"What in the bloody hell did you do to yourself here?" The woman demanded.

"What are you talking about?" He again tried to turn his head, but Juliet grabbed both sides of his head and said. "Face forward, Magnum, damn it. Did you get this when you got hit on the back of the head?"

Thomas rolled his eyes and retorted testily. "As I haven't the foggiest idea what you are talking about, I can't really answer that question, now can I? However, so far as I know, the shovel hit me right in the back of my head, there was no other impact, but really, you would have to ask the kid who hit me as I was unconscious at the time."

"Kumu, would you please get me an ice pack?"

"You've got it. Be right back."

Magnum heaved a very put upon sigh. "What's the ice pack for? As we are talking about my body, I would like to know what you are seeing, please."

Juliet sighed. "You are definitely NOT going swimming this evening, Thomas. You have a massive bruise back here and your shoulder is extremely swollen. I think you need x-rays."

"What? No way...I'll swim it off. I am not going to the ER, Jules...it isn't needed."

"Will you bloody well listen to me for once, Magnum? I think something may be broken in here."

"Higgins, I think I would know if I broke my shoulder. I probably just aggravated an old injury I have in that area."

"The bruise indicates an injury, probably blunt force. The coloration tells me it is about as old as your concussion. I think the man must have hit you more than just once. Did Katsumoto take you to the ER after that happened?"

"No. I didn't think I needed it."

"Did he even examine you?"

"Why would he examine me? He's a detective, not a doctor." Magnum replied. "Jules, I'll be fine. Let me go back to my original plan and take a swim."

"Like hell, I will allow that to happen. This has to be hurting, Thomas." As Kumu handed her the ice pack wrapped in a dish towel, Higgins slapped it onto his shoulder, causing the man to jump though her hand on his other shoulder kept him seated. "You are staying right there for the time being if I have to restrain you." She realized she had said the wrong thing when she saw how pale he became. She walked around in front of this difficult man and knelt before him. "Thomas, I'm sorry, but I am genuinely concerned here. I must insist..."

Magnum shook his head. "Jules, I appreciate your concern, but it can't be that bad. I rowed this morning and, yeah, it twinged a bit, but not that bad. So it can't be broken again...I'd know."

"Again?" Kumu asked.

Magnum shrugged with his other shoulder. "It wasn't my shoulder but the...aw, I can't remember the name of it...the bone that runs from your neck to your shoulder got snapped by an AK-47 butt when we were in captivity. The scapula was broken, too. I remember the pain from that time and this is nowhere near as bad as that was."

"Perhaps you have built up a higher pain tolerance because of your time in the camps." Juliet offered, hesitantly.

"I don't think so," Thomas sighed. "If anything, I'm more of a wuss than I was back then."

"I don't believe that for a moment, Magnum," Higgins said seriously.

"This, from the woman who told me to man up after I was hit by a car?"

"You had scared me, Thomas...I tend to snap things out when I am frightened. I don't like being frightened, it makes me ..."

"Grumpy? Good to know." Thomas smiled at her. "Is there any way I can see what is going on with my shoulder here?"

Kumu silently handed Higgins two hand mirrors of the type hairstylists use to show you your haircut when it's done. Juliet smiled at the older woman. "I'll show you once that ice bag has been on for 20 minutes and not a moment sooner. Alright?" Her tone had become very conciliatory.

Magnum nodded. "Okay, Higgins. I'll be good. Do you have any ice cream?"

Higgins chuckled. "Ice cream, not a lollipop?"

Kumu offered. "A bowl of vanilla ice cream coming up, Thomas. Juliet, you want any?"

"I'll have a small bowl, please, Kumu."

As the older woman turned to go get the treats, Magnum called out. "Thank you, Kumu."

Thomas slowly tried to stretch without moving the injured side too much. "This is why I wanted to swim...I'm getting stiff."

"I shouldn't wonder...you were coshed on the head and fell to the ground, you probably have more than a few bruises to go with the spectacular one here on your shoulder. Thomas, you really need to take better care of yourself. Why in the hell didn't you go to the hospital after you were knocked out?"

Magnum shrugged, both shoulders, but reaching up with his right hand to hold the ice pack in place on his shoulder. "I was on a case...and it was important to Katsumoto. I really didn't think it was that bad."

Juliet sighed... "And I rest my case. I swear you need a keeper, Magnum."

"I'll second that emotion. What's with the ice on your shoulder, Thomas?" Detective Katsumoto asked as he came up the path from the gate.

Silently, Higgins lifted up the ice pack and showed the man Magnum's shoulder. "What in the hell - Thomas, you didn't tell me he hit you in your shoulder, too?

"God, everybody is going to see MY shoulder before I do."

Juliet glanced at her watch. "Just a few more minutes, Magnum."

Katsumoto gave a grumpy huff. "That's it. You are going to the ER - that looks awful."

"My body, my choice...and I say..."

Juliet, Gordon, and Kumu all said together, "You're fine."

"Yeah, Magnum, you are always fine. Your leg could be hanging on one thin strip of muscle, completely torn off otherwise, and you would still say you were bloody well, fine!" Higgins was seriously fed up.

Katsumoto made the mistake of cracking up at that line. Higgins did not look happy at that. Kumu handed Higgins and Magnum their ice cream and immediately asked the Detective. "Would you like some vanilla ice cream or water or something?"

Katsumoto smiled at the older woman and said. "Thank you, Kumu, but no. I just had dinner a while ago. I came by because, Thomas, Mrs. Tak would like you to come to the house on Saturday. Would you be okay with that?"

"Me? Why would she want me to come?"

"After you and Higgins came to the internment, she started asking a lot more questions about who you were, how I knew you...she really appreciates you helping me out on this case and she wants to get to know you."

Thomas blushed. "I don't know, Detective. The credit and stuff should go to you, I didn't..."

The detective snorted. "Forget it, Magnum. You are coming unless you wind up in the hospital with that shoulder."

"Oh for cry-aye! It's ..."

"not that bad!" The other three chimed in together.

"You can't see it, Magnum. It is that bad." Katsumoto advised him seriously. "Look, I'll pay if that's your issue..."

"It's not that," Magnum sighed. "They'll want to do surgery if I get an X-ray. I don't want that. I have an old injury there that didn't heal right from when I was in the camps; when I was a prisoner of the Taliban, but it would be weeks before I could get back to life, and I'm not going for it. I can't...it would be like being back there. I can't do it. NO!" He stood up and walked away. Juliet sighed and followed him, taking the empty ice cream bowl out of his hand.

"Thomas..." She said, gently.

He just shook his head and turned and went into the guest house, slamming the door, and she heard the lock click into place. She sighed and walked back to where the detective stood frowning. As she drew near, he asked her. "Is he alright?"

"I think he's a bit triggered by this injury, Detective."

"Call me Gordon. Do we need to call the guys?"

"Probably, but I don't think he'd be very receptive right now. He was at the King Kamehameha Club earlier, and, if I know those two, they noticed enough that they will show up on their own at some point during the night."

"What? Are they psychic?" The detective asked.

"They are something. He'll be having night terrors and they show up before we even call them. Those three know each other in a way that is almost beyond comprehension...and they must have subtle tells that they each pick up on. It isn't one sided either - them taking care of him, you know? He knows when Rick is having a rough time."

"Oh, I've been in on that, just recently."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I'll tell you that story another time. If they or you manage to talk him around to going to the ER, give me a call, okay? That injury is my responsibility. It looks really gnarly...I don't like that he won't go."

"Neither do I, but he is an adult."

"Yeah, well he's acting juvenile." Katsumoto snapped. "Sorry, he's just kind of got me worried. What if the concussion is worse than he thinks, too?"

Higgins sighed. "That thought had occurred to me as well. Let's not go borrowing trouble, Gordon. Sufficient unto the day..."

"Are the troubles thereof." The detective finished. "My auntie used to say that all the time." He smiled... "is it, Shakespeare?"

"The Bible actually...I believe it is from the Sermon On The Mount...Matthew 6:34...if I remember correctly."

"I didn't think you were the religious type."

"Oh, I'm not, but in my day, in English school, we got religious education as a part of our schooling. You see the Queen, in those days was - technically still, is Defender of the Faith. So we never had the complete separation of church and state that you have here in the states. Religion was taught in schools back when I was young. Now, they say if Charles ever makes it to the throne, he will be sworn in as Defender of Faith, not Defender of THE Faith. As Britain is much more multi-faith and multi-cultural these days, I don't know what they teach in school now...comparative religion?"

"I haven't the foggiest idea, Higgins. Back to Thomas, I really am worried. I feel responsible."

"He wouldn't want you to, you know. He'd say it's his choice."

Gordon frowned. "Not on my watch...he got hurt helping me. He didn't have to be there."

Juliet laughed. "Of course he did. There was a mystery to be solved. The man can't resist a puzzle. He even finished a jigsaw puzzle I had planned on working on for the next few weeks while I was out with Kumu at a function last week, a thousand piece puzzle. Although to be fair he bought me a replacement the next day and apologized."

"Wait. He actually paid for something?"

"Yes, Gordon. He does manage to pay for things occasionally." They smiled at each other.

Katsumoto shook his head, musing aloud. "Thomas Magnum is really something else, isn't he?"

Higgins smiled and looked towards the guest house. "He truly is - special in his own unique way, our White Knight. I'm still only beginning to get to know him, but he does grow on you."

The detective wrinkled his nose. "He's an acquired taste, but he does grow on you, like a fungus."

"And he's come through for both of us a time or two now, hasn't he?"

"Him and Rick and TC,…yes, they have."

"They are a matched set." Juliet agreed.

"You have my number?"

"It's in my phone."

"Call me whatever time it is, if someone convinces him to go to the hospital, okay?"

"You've got it, Detective Katsumoto."

"Thanks, Higgins. Good night, ladies." The detective turned and left. His car was parked outside the gate and Higgins opened the gate as he approached it.

"We never did show Thomas his shoulder…" Kumu pointed out.

"The stubborn fool lumbered off before I could."

To be continued…

A/N: At least one person has already seen and reviewed this. I wrote it today starting while I was up in El Dorado Hills, CA to see the movie, APOLLO 11. If you haven't seen it, I urge you to go and see it. It is much more than the old footage we have seen on History Channel and really excellent. I used to work on The USS Hornet, a retired Aircraft Carrier/museum down in the Bay area. I was one of many who actually helped save it from the scrapper's torch. The USS Hornet picked up Apollo 11 when they got back from going to the moon. My father also worked on the Apollo project in a distant, but vital way. He got to go to NASA before the rocket was assembled...he was a technical writer and wrote the technical manuals for the camera equipment that went to the moon. So between the connection to my Dad, long dead now...and my connection to the ship (when I was first aboard her after she was saved, my first job aboard I was trained to deliver the safety briefing.) Myself and my friend, Diana, were also trained to be the Apollo specialists to give folks tours of the Apollo exhibits on the ship and actually got to go inside the MQF on the ship with Buzz Aldrin, more than once. It was great to see that movie today. Well, night all...I am already writing the next section of this in my mind. Hope you all enjoy this first part.

[transformers-art-showcase]

P.A.T.C.H. #7: "Starscream: The Movie"

Most often in comics, continuity is a problem for newbies. If you don’t know what the characters are talking about and what in-jokes they make, is there really a point in recommending the book? Yes, I hear you; this here feature is supposed to help with sorting those messes out, after all. But what if something has such a killer concept you can’t help but blabber on about it? Even to people not into the comic series?

Case in point: a Cybertronian tries to make a movie about Starscream for humans. My mom was sold. Be as cool as my mom!

“Thundercracker in: Starscream: The Movie”

“Optimus Prime” Annual (2018)/“Transformers: Optimus Prime” Volume 5 (upcoming as of this writing) Written by John Barber, pencils by Priscilla Tramontano and Andrew Griffith, colors by John-Paul Bove and Josh Burcham, letters by Shawn Lee

SO WHAT’S IT ABOUT? Starscream, Lord of Cybertron, fed up with his notoriety amongst his subjects, decides on a solution: good old-fashioned propaganda! Having learned of his old wing-mate’s passion for writing, he tasks ex-Seeker Thundercracker with scripting, casting and directing a movie about his life. Who cares if said ex-comrade has only written human soap opera fan fiction and unpublished screenplays so stilted, they would make “Birdemic” green with envy? He’s really into it! Surely, nothing can go wrong!

WHAT DO I NEED TO KNOW? Given that this issue came out in the last year of the IDW Generation One continuity, there are various bits and pieces to consider before diving in, but probably the most important has to do with the evolution of Thundercracker, from Seeker repaint to real boy fleshed-out character. While his goofy and hopelessly optimistic personality is well-established in the series and this here issue completes his origin story, it can’t harm to go over it and pick some highlights.

The fate of Thundercracker –or TC to his friends- has long been intertwined with that of two more famous Decepticon fliers: OG bad boy Starscream and official stair-pusher Skywarp. The first years’ worth of stories weren’t different: the three met Megatron together for the first time in the mini-series “Megatron: Origins”, written by Eric Holmes, penciled by Alex Milne and colored by Josh Perez. His most interesting beat in that story was expressing doubt over burning the city of Kaon, only to be pacified by Skywarp –“Don’t think. Just do it.”, he said. After that, and for the longest time, from the “Autocracy Trilogy” to the “–ations”, the blue jet remained a constant if discreet presence in the Decepticon forces. He was always there, often under Starscream, never in a major role, sometimes uncomfortable with his place.

Still, there were a couple exceptions to this. In “Spotlight: Orion Pax”, written by James Roberts, he was a reluctant underling to mad scientist Bludgeon. He crossed paths with the creepy samurai again much later, in “Spotlight: Thundercracker”, written by John Barber with art by Chee Yang Ong, this time while searching for the original Titans. In that story, he had a change of heart when he found Metroplex, and lied so the ancient Transformer wouldn’t fall into Decepticon hands. In both cases, the further away he stayed from bad influences, the more functional his moral compass became.

The great break from all the above –ironically, inspired by his original toy bio– came with his rejection of the Decepticon cause. In “All Hail Megatron” (written by Shane McCarthy and with art by Guido Guidi), after witnessing the brutalities and monstrosities his side was capable of –namely, razing human cities and creating the Insecticons-, he prevented the detonation of a nuclear bomb and briefly worked with the Autobots. (His reward? Getting shot in the face by Skywarp. Some comradery.) In the next ongoing (look for the stand-alone issue #4, written by Mike Costa, penciled by Don Figueroa, with colors by James Brown and letters by Robbie Robbins), it was revealed that thankfully, he survived, kept barely online on Earth and scavenging for fuel. He also picked up a new best friend: human television! Laugh all you want, but it gave him a new appreciation for humans and their adaptability –couldn’t his own species be like this? While he turned into a reluctant ally to the Autobots, he stayed out of intense battles...

... until he got to work with his new best friends in Season 2 of “Robots in Disguise”: Earth people! Between the regeneration of the planet and Starscream’s rise to power, TC stayed back on the blue marble and got in touch with human anti-Transformer forces, who provided him with fuel and a home. (A gift puppy named Buster sealed the deal and immediately became fealty.) In return, they wanted his services against Autobot invaders, but his love of Earth got in the way of that. What also got in the way was his new calling: writing! Inspired by the years he spent watching TV, he then went on to create totally original and very high quality screenplays, hoping they would lead to a career in film. (They haven’t so far. There’s a reason the Wiki has quotes from “The Room” in his personal page.) Still, eventually things turned out well enough: he helped untangle the mess of allegiances between the Earth Defense Command and Cybertronians and formed an enduring friendship with female Earth human Marissa Faireborn. Not bad for someone whose biggest claim to fame was being the answer to a trivia question –“Who was the first Decepticon shown in active combat in IDW continuity?”

Finally, some minor bits of backstory to make a few character beats land easier. An institute protecting Transformers with “abnormal” powers was first introduced in “More Than Meets the Eye” #11, by James Roberts and Alex Milne. The re-discovery of the Cybertronian Colonies started with the people of Caminus –Windblade, Chromia and Nautica- in “Dark Cybertron”, and they were all immediately integrated into the books –we’ve talked about the first “Windblade” mini here. The dead colony of Prion, shown in “The Transformers” #57 (by Barber and Livio Ramondelli) wasn’t nearly so lucky. The creation of the Council of Worlds for the governance of the surviving ones was detailed in the “Windblade: Distant Stars” mini-series, written by Maighread Scott, with art by Corin Howell and colors by Thomas Deer. After that, colonists such as Aileron (“The Transformers” #44, by Barber, Griffith, Perez on colors and Tom B. Long on letters) joined the action on Cybertron, though not without problems. Oh, and that huge dinosaur was brought online in the “Salvation” one-shot and has been used as an embassy since “Optimus Prime” #13-14 (by Barber, Ramondelli and Long). As it happens.

WHERE DO I GO FROM THERE? Why’d you think I listed all those previous stories above? So that you can go and get ‘em!

Okay, to be less abrasive and more specific, there isn’t that much to get into after this story, but there’s plenty to jump back to. Almost all these minor characters have had memorable stories told about them, so I’m only going to single out some personal favorites and let you decide what you might be into. Fat Fast Tankor’s most memorable outings have been at the hands of Maighread Scott, and it was in the first “Windblade” mini that he and his bestie, Tall Tankor, started getting some attention. For another visit to Alpha Trion, Adorable Old Man (And More), see “Optimus Prime” #10, by Barber, Zama and Burcham. For the amazing life of Richard Ruby, film producer and ex-superhero (no, really), check out “Revolutionaries” #3 by Barber, pencils by Ron Joseph, Sebastian Cheng on colors and Long lettering. Finally, for a story that demonstrates Marissa’s own issues (and just how much of a sweetspark TC is), “New Cybertron” (“Optimus Prime” #1-6) by Barber, Zama, Milne and Burcham has you covered.

But clearly this isn’t why you’re here. You want more of The Artist’s work. For that, head over to the “Transformers Holiday Special” (which we’ve visited before here), for the ten-page story by Barber, Burcham and Long. It is a Christmas story that is children’s storybook by way of Frank Miller, and it might be the best thing in the whole line. In the same trade you’ll find the “Revolution” tie-in issue for the “Robots in Disguise” series, written by Barber, with pencils by Griffith and colors by Thomas Deer. While it’s connected to a much larger event, it’s valuable for seeing how TC evaluates his own work and how he works with Marissa. It is a Hollywood action movie pastiche with a failed screenplay layered on top, and it’s a sweet little tribute to the character. Both of these stories work with similar themes to this one, but expand them in different directions.

IS IT ANY GOOD? It was the culmination of a few years’ worth of stories with an endearing secondary character taking center stage. It offered a sideways look into a fascinating time in “Transformers” comics, through its less important players. It was a funny and poignant look into what can go wrong with any piece of art we create, consume, curate and love (or, more importantly, ignore). It had some exceptional so-bad-it’s-good writing and art. It had a cute puppy in it.

PUPPY! WHO’S A GOOD PUPPY, WHO’S THE BEST PUPPY?! BUSTER IS! YES, SHE IS! Stop baby-talking one of the main characters and concentrate! Here, this should keep you busy!

LIKE A MOVIE STAR WITHOUT MOVIES | THEME AND CHARACTER Strip away all the superficialities, and what is this story about? An artist attempts to create a work of art, and Poe’s Law comes into full effect. His source material is controversial –few people have kind things to say about Starscream. His sources lack credibility –the subject of the movie himself is a liar with a ton of guilt on his shoulders. His production value is low -seriously, I’m having “Pop Quiz Hotshot” flashbacks here. He himself lacks training and discipline, and he and his crew aren’t on the same page –oh, and one of them isn’t paid. He gets preoccupied with details -Megatron had a different frame in “Robots in Disguise”! There goes the suspension of disbelief! He has so little faith in himself that he blindly follows whatever advice he’s offered –is it a commercial or personal work, then? And in the end, no matter his passion and drive for the project, he fails for reasons beyond his control, not even his own mistakes. This kind of story can work only if we’re invested in the mad ambition of its main creator, and TC’s unlucky, stubborn and likeable enough to pull it off. The annual, then, becomes a love letter to art creation in general: a whole lot of people with conflicting ideas try to create something meaningful against all odds. Even if the end product isn’t great, you have to feel for all the effort, the time and energy spent (or wasted) on it, right?

There’s also an extra layer to all this, and it’s specifically about Cracker’s relation to his work. At this point in the series, TC has officially renounced the Decepticons and wants to leave a peaceful life on Earth. This project about one of his former associates makes him ask all sorts of questions: what drove Starscream to do the things he did? How does he handle the unstable political climate after the Autobot victory? Did the War ever mean anything to anyone? And what is there to do after the War? These aren’t easy questions, and the ex-Seeker’s own stance on these issues is complicated by his personal feelings and involvement. This might be a movie about Starscream, but deep down, this is a story about Thundercracker. (This becomes even more apparent when one remembers the two share the same mold.) While the theme of failed or doubtful artists is universal, the specificity of this million-year-long War informs it with extra nuances that enrich an already interesting character portrait.

“Oh man, I just can't figure Starscream out. Sometimes he’s just too smart. Sometimes he’s just flat-out stupid. Other times he’s just evil.”

ENHANCED BY BRAND NEW SPECIAL EFFECTS| ART This whole examination could have ended up dry and boring, but in the hands of penciler Priscilla Tramontano, it gets a life and energy it would otherwise lack. Her greatest strength is the expressiveness she lends to the characters, and so she’s the perfect fit for a story with lots of quick, fully dialogue. Little casual touches and details, like reading glasses or cups of coffee, make the world of alien robots a little more approachable and help ease us into its confused protagonist’s mind. John-Paul Bove’s colors are bright and poppy, but moody in the more serious parts (like TC’s meeting with Dirge and relaxing at the beach near the end). Andrew Griffith and Josh Burcham contribute pencils and colors respectively in two key scenes, one flashback to just before the War and the trailer for a rival production. Their more detailed, somber yet action-oriented style helps draw attention to them, but the overall tone doesn’t shift from the fast-paced comedy and introspection of the whole issue. In any case, the story never loses its sense of wonder: this is a charming, strange little world, and in the increasingly serious main title, this can sometimes fall through the cracks.

However, this is the rare case of a comic whose artistic failings are also interesting in their own way. The scenes shown from “Starscream: The Movie” itself are bad on purpose, and so multiple movie mistakes are recreated in comics form. The lighting is almost always off in most scenes, and in some cases, it’s easy to make a green highlight around the actors –the result of cheap color correction. In another scene, the focus is all wrong, and so “Megatron” and “Starscream” are blurry or stick like sore thumbs from the background. When Thundercracker cannot stage the Decepticon uprising from the first storyline of “Robots in Disguise”, he ends up using archival footage for it –and so the same panels that Andrew Griffith drew for issue #13 are re-used wholesale! While it can be distracting at first, these mistakes become doubly fun when spotted and only add to the joke. (They can also make all amateur filmmakers out there check their equipment twice before starting filming. Never go with auto-focus, people!)

“Hey, everybody! I have an announcement to make!”

AN AWKWARD PAUSE, THEN “WHAT'S MY LINE?”| PLOT AND DIALOGUE But forget pretty much everything I’ve written so far, because the number one reason to read this story is how damn funny it is. And that’s not just for the guilty pleasure of mocking Thundercracker’s work. Sure, the tone-deaf, repetitive dialogue, the hammy acting and the flubs of the final film (poor Waspinator, always a victim) are extremely enjoyable, but that ignores the real back-and-forth of the characters. Even better is how the movie scenes are staged alongside the rest of TC’s discussions and efforts. The issue is expertly paced, each page functioning as a scene into its own, with set-ups and payoffs. When read all together, it’s like a very well-edited movie: it remains fast and doesn’t sag, and the connections between the disparate scenes become apparent on a second read-through. The cyclical flow of the story –it begins and ends with a very similar scene- can be seen as bittersweet and uplifting at the same time, and it made this here reader want to re-read the issue the moment it was over.

One of Barber’s greatest gifts as a writer –owing to his experience as an editor- is his mastery of continuity, but here he also demonstrates a firm understanding of Transformers and pop culture. His cheeky world-building –giant robots make movies, too!- combines satire and Trans-fan practices -repaints are totally a thing!- into one whole. Humans get a lot to do in this world, too, being both friends and potential business partners, in a co-existence that might even bring to mind the days of the original cartoon. My favorite example might be TC’s interactions with a former superhero, prospective film producer and distributor. The practicality of creating and curating a movie clashes wonderfully with the insanity of a sci-fi world and some obscure pop and high culture references. It’s this level of detail and care for all those losers that gives the story a beating heart that is often forgotten when talking about this specific writer’s work.

“You know what they say, ‘Love is blind’!”

THE CREDITS ROLL, THE CAMERA PANS | FINAL THOUGHTS Going over all the things I’ve written so far about this annual, I see that I could still go on. This here read focused on the story from a newbie perspective, because with continuity in mind, there’s a whole other essay’s worth of stuff to unpack! (One could re-interpret it as a Starscream and not a Thundercracker story, in fact!) But even with all that aside, this is a really fun, sweet diversion from the political drama of “Optimus Prime”, a great tribute to the bit players of the franchise and a love letter to the creative process as a whole. Oh, and there’s new jokes to find in, like, every new read! I literally just today remembered Fake!Ironhide’s Southern accent! That stuff’s amazing!

[ceescedasticity]

0k: *purrty time* (2)

*purrty time* (2)

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < *ac would like it to be known that the art/talent show is ofur and* AC: :33 < *ca is NOT dead!* AC: :33 < *despite furrious purrotestations to the contrary*

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: How'd it go???

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < can't speak for what the seadweller instructors thought AC: :33 < but consensus among other guests seemed to be giggling ofur the bucket aspect AC: :33 < and thinking the art is okay AC: :33 < which was better than a couple of the others AC: :33 < :33

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: 8)

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: I dunno if I'd go THAT far CA: as far as smiley faces I mean CA: but it could'vve been wworse

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: What did Awwakk do?

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: photoshopped a drawwing of the Mother Grub into a photo of her seaplane CA: evveryone wwas nonplussed

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropvox

AG: ...

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: yeah CA: Bissel actually DID underwwater singing CA: it wwas wweird CA: Soldie had landscape photography with jade tinted filters CA: Kellep had this hand drawwn sea chart showwing locations of seadwweller communities accompanied by this wwhole big thing about howw amazing it is that the Mother Grub distributes us so wwidely CA: I convvinced Soldie to wwait until the instructors wweren't RIGHT there to point out to him he forgot about the jadebloods CA: he is vvery embarrassed and hasn't showwn up to the party

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < *ac's blockmate said something about him hiding with his lusus?*

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: wwell CA: all of them wwere better than Itchee CA: his breathtakingly beautiful coral mosaic turned out to be some tiny scallop shells glued to construction paper CA: guess he panicked

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gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: W3 H4V3 TR1UMPH4NTLY PR3S3NT3D TH3 C4S3! GC: 1 DONT KNOW 1F TH3YR3 GO1NG TO TH1NK W3 W3R3 B3ST BUT 1M SUR3 W3R3 1N TH3 4CC3PT4BL3 R4NG3. GC: >:] GC: ST1LL LOTS OF C4S3S TO GO. GC: 1NCLUD1NG L4OV1C, 1 DONT KNOW HOW TH4TLL GO. GC: ... GC: W1LL SOM3ON3 PL34S3 C4LL OFF THE GHOST BODYGU4RDS?

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twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: iim tryiing two fiigure out how two get domii and crappy an2weriing 2y2tem two make up iin tiime two play thii2 game ii 2pent forever codiing TA: domii blamed 2warm for not knowiing about/2toppiing the traffiickiing operatiion TA: 2warm defended hiim2elf wiith a na2ty comment about overbear TA: now they arent 2peakiing TA: there2 no way ruthle22 regulatiion wiill play iif theyre not, and mariine2 only maybe up two it TA: iif iit2 ju2t me and loopyFruiit2 playiing ii wiill 2laughter her and 2hell get fed up and quiit

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: AM I SERIOUSLY THE ONLY ONE WHO THINKS HAVING ALL THE HELMSMEN PLAY MARRIO KART MIGHT BE A BAD IDEA? CG: I KNOW YOU HAVE THINGS UNDER CONTROL, TA, AND I KNOW LOOPYFRUITS IS INTERMEDIATE, TOO, BUT AREN'T SOME OF THE OTHERS INTEGRATED? CG: COULDN'T SOME OF THE DRIVING... LEAK?

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: domii and ruthle22 regulatiion are old pro2 TA: they wouldnt 2iign up two play iif they couldnt control iit

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: ... CG: YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THE HELMSMAN OF THE MMP. MARINE.

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: ye2 ii diid, ii 2aiid he miight not be up two it

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: ... CG: IF THE MAGNIFUCKING PREDATION SUDDENLY SHOOTS SIDEWAYS ACROSS THE SQUADRON TRYING TO THROW THINGS AT OTHER SHIPS, I WILL KNOW WHO TO BLAME.

terminallyCapricious left a file in the dropbox

TC: wHaT AbOuT ThE HeLmSmAn oN ThE GlEeFuL AbAnDoN? TC: Do yOu tHiNk sHe mIgHt wAnT To pLaY?

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: iive been thiinkiing about that TA: but iitll take more fine22e two arrange TA: dont thiink iit2 fea2iible iin the next few day2

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adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: tHIS IS NOT, A CHEAP LIQUOR, AT: yOU WOULD THINK, PEOPLE MIGHT MAKE MORE OF AN EFFORT, NOT TO SPILL IT AT: oN EVERYTHING,

adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: fRIEAS, MAY ACTUALLY, BE SLIGHTLY CONCERNED, AT: aBOUT HIS SUPPOSED MOIRAIL, AT: ,,, AT: oR ELSE, HE'S HUNG OVER, FROM YESTERDAY,

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: W3LL, L4OV1C S33MS TO B3 M4K1NG 4 GOOD SHOW1NG OF 1T. GC: TH1NGS 4R3 NOT LOOK1NG GOOD FOR ON3 H1RD4N Y4TTON. GC: ...NOT LOOK1NG GOOD FOR CONC34L1NG H1S PROB4BLE ROL3 1N TH3 4TT4CK ON L4OV1C, NOT SUR3 1F TH3R3LL B3 4NY FURTH3R CONS3QU3NC3S.

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apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: this p0ssibility g0t left 0ut 0f my die during h0liday/dispel during h0liday predicti0ns: AA: s0me sugjugglat0rs were 0rdering pe0ple t0 entertain them and then killing them if they d0nt satisfy AA: it seems s0me 0f the victims have decided t0 c0ntinue the entertainment anyway AA: including s0me0ne with a 0ne man band AA: s0 the m0st prestigi0us highbl00d party is n0w being haunted by a gh0st with a 0ne man band

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: th0ugh it may n0t c0unt f0r that since weve had the dispel 0rder given and rev0ked f0ur times already AA: highbl00d partyg0ers cann0t agree 0n whether they are supp0sed t0 t0ugh it 0ut

terminallyCapricious left a file in the dropbox

TC: i wOnDeR If i cOuLd gEt a OnE MaN BaNd?

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: ... CG: I THOUGHT YOU WANTED TO LEARN XYLOPHONE NEXT?

terminallyCapricious left a file in the dropbox

TC: wElL YeAh TC: bUt a oNe mAn bAnD SoUnDs cOoL FoR SoMeDaY TC: :o)

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: i think scavenge is trying t0 call dibs AA: 0n the 0ne man band AA: i assume he means the gh0st with the 0ne man band since its n0t like it c0uld be anything else but thats n0t what he said

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gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: CT! GC: TH3Y 4R3 S3TT1NG UP 4 L1V3 F33D OF YOUR ROBOT F1GHT!

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: GU3SS H3S NOT H3R3. PROB4BLY W1S3. GC: 4NYON3 3LS3 W4TCH1NG?

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: ye2 TA: watchiing them 2et up, at the moment TA: tho2e really are exce22iively large robot2

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: Can't go 8ack to GARPing until it's over, might as well! AG: It does look much 8etter than CT's usual ro8ots.

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < *ac waves to her meowrail even though he is sensibly prepurring the robot instead of browsing the dropbox!* AC: :33 < we're watching! it looks great!

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC :|| < some of those spectators should move further back, though

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: LOOKS L1K3 TH3YR3 MOV1NG NOW?

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :|| < FURTHER back

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: I could try to spook them further away? AG: ::::)

gallowsCalibrator left a file in the dropbox

GC: 1M NOT SUR3 TH4TS TH3 B3ST 1D34.

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: maybe ii can get domii two page 2omeone TA: no, theyre backiing up more now TA: far enough, AC?

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :?? < *ac... thinks so?*

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: Hey, that Naspar guy's putting up some sort of transparent shield thing!

arsenicCatnip left a file in the dropbox

AC: :33 < oh good AC: :33 < :33

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: ii know we were all jokiing about the robot mother grub rampagiing off two take over the 2hiip but that thiing doe2 look alarmiingly... 2hiip-takeover-capable TA: good thiing iit2 fiightiing the other robot2 and not leadiing them

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centaursTesticle left a file in the dropbox

CT: D --> TA CT: D --> When you have an opportunity CT: D --> I would STRONGly appreciate any assistance you could provide in tracking down the origin of the irregularity robot megalobster's programming CT: D --> It was not supposed to do that

arachnidsGrip left a file in the dropbox

AG: I thought the way you used the ro8ot mother gru8 to pin it down was really 8adass, though!

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adiosToreador left a file in the dropbox

AT: iF i NEVER, SEE ANOTHER PAIL-SHAPED NOVELTY BEVERAGE CONTAINER, IT WILL BE TOO SOON, AT: eSPECIALLY, ONES THROWN ON THE FLOOR,

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twinArmageddons left file HOLY2HIITCAVERN2 in the dropbox

GA: It Happened GA: Everything Went Well We Think GA: The New One Has Settled And GA: And GA: The Elder One Has Passed GA: Everyone Is Crying GA: But Hopeful GA: ... GA: Now One Of The Older Rainbow Drinkers Insists I Need To Go Get GA: I Quote GA: Rainbow Drunker GA: I GA: Am Not Sure How To Take That

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: ...

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: ...

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: ...

carcinoGeneticist left a file in the dropbox

CG: ... CG: ACTUALLY CAN WE JUST *ASSUME* EVERYONE WENT AROUND AND ...'D?

caligulasAquarium left a file in the dropbox

CA: I need a drink

apocalypseArisen left a file in the dropbox

AA: i need t0 get the late bartender 0ut of the cavalreaper party AA: and then take l0ng en0ugh c0ming back that i d0nt get assigned t0 explain anything t0 c0rpsepap

twinArmageddons left a file in the dropbox

TA: goiing two try two talk domii and 2warm around agaiin

cuttlefishCuller left a file in the dropbox

CC: ... CC: ... CC: ... CC: ... CC: ... CC: ... CC: ... CC: whale do better, this time

[baldwin-montclair]

I got the impression that all Philippe’s kids do not get along with Ysabeau, even my favourite and arguably most laid back of Baldwin’s sisters (that we’ve met), Freyja is even hostile towards her. It’s also possible when Ysabeau agrees with Diana’s saying that she hates him with a ‘so do I’ (in BOL) that she doesn’t really mean it. After all, she did just give Diana the choice between calling Matthew and calling Baldwin after they ran into Benjamin at the library.

If it would help get Diana back, I believe Ysabeau would call him regardless. He is an excellent tracker. She’s way too efficient to let personal feelings get in the way of accomplishing a task. Not proof that she does/doesn’t hate him, just don’t think that IF she did, it would not stop her from using his skills to her advantage.

In terms of measuring up to Philippe, I agree that’s something he’s judged by, possibly adding to the animosity.

He does help Matthew get Diana back and to be honest, I loved them working together, especially Matthew out of his mind with worry and Baldwin being able to make him stop and think. The show is different in that they had Baldwin be like ‘I only saved her so I can bring her to the Congregation’ which undercut his decision to help a tad.

Yeah, the asshole-ish stuff in TBOL, lol! I think we can all admit that, yes, we get why but OMG, Baldwin pls stop.

Hugh no longer being the heir before his death, Maybe.

I know Hugh, Fernando and Gallowglass had a place that Matthew would visit and stay when he was fed up. I don’t think Philippe disowned Hugh, which would have taken him out of the running to lead the family. I might be wrong but I got the feeling that Baldwin was chosen more for loyalty and reliability for following orders than as possible successor.

I searched through the books and haven’t found evidence to anyone ever referring to Baldwin as “good man”-- and I can’t think of any character who would, to be honest. The resentment towards Baldwin carries on into TC, even after his noticeable character development at the end of TBOL.

This has me stumped! Like I’m sure I read it but have no idea where and you’re right, like who tf would have said it?? If I come across it again I’m totally noting it because it would be such a stand out thing. I sorta feel like it was a second hand telling, like a character said Philippe thought/said Baldwin was a good man???

I don’t know if I’d call him “good” but he certainly is a complicated man with layers and layers to him that are yet to be uncovered (yes, hopefully in a future solo book).

Absolutely, he’s so interesting and I’m sure our questions will be answered in another book.

Until then @marirable, I’ll get my Baldwin fix from your your Baldwin fics!!!

Baldwin is not afraid of Gerbert! Not even close. This isn’t bluffed confidence, he could tear the other vampire apart and they both know it!

Then, why this expression:

Simply, he was concerned for Agatha!

Gerbert looks like he’s making a beeline for her after she makes a comment he doesn’t like. Someone who would have no chance against any vampire, let alone such an old one.

Would Gerbert dare attack a Congregation member? Baldwin’s not sure but the possibility worries him.

We stan a Chivalrous Knight who actually gives a crap about protecting those that need it.

[bwicblog]

RS: | Is Anyone Here not Enthralled by the Battle Talk | ? |

ID: yo.

RS: | Because | Heavens | I know I'm Not |

RS: | How Did That Even Start | ? | =:1 |

ID: i hit things until they stop moving, don't need to talk about it. =:I

ID: nerds. that's how.

VA: I Think iT sTemmed frŏm Talk abŏuT The upcŏming fair

RS: | Yes | Haha | That's about All You Need to Do | Isn't It | ? | RS: | Or Hit Them Hard Enough You can Abscond |

ID: i mean. i always hit them until they stop moving but absconding works for you so rock it.

ID: don't need to read about armies to figure out how to cull a troll. =:/

VA: Survival is The mŏsT impŏrTanT parT anyway

RS: | Haha | Well | I don't Always Abscond | RS: | Just | Mostly | It's a Little Pointless to Actually Fight People |

RS: | Never Mind | Cull Them |

ID: hey you take that back. =:P

RS: | Haha | Me | or VA | ? |

RS: | Survival is Important | ! | =:B |

ID: well i meant you but i guess i can fight survival too.

VA: I dunnŏ, survival is preTTy alrighT

LL: That's what I keep SAYING, tbh! LL: Like, everyone's on about fighting with STICKS and I don't GET why you don't just go and pick up a GUN.

VA: WaiT why are yŏu here

VA: Yŏu're Teal

LL: Insider secrets??

ID: fucking hell we're under attack.

LL: Also I'm moirails with ID.

ID: ...other id.

LL: The REAL one, not the dude that won't fight with a gun.

VA: ŏh, ThaT's beTTer Than The answer I was expecTing

ID: i have psi, i am the gun!

LL: IDK, I was just CURIOUS.

LL: Oh, shit.

LL: See, that actually makes SENSE!

VA: I dŏ jusT fine wiThŏuT ŏne

LL: Yeah, I was just CURIOUS about why there's a LOWBLOOD channel. LL: I can only see it like HALF the time anyways, I think the OTHER mod keeps kicking me.

LL: Yeah, but, like do you FIGHT people with guns?

LL: Bc if so: BADASS, tbh.

RS: | I have Contemplated Firearms on Occasion |

VA: I mean, I have

RS: | They're very Efficient |

LL: ^^^^

RS: | | Also | Dramatic | Haha |

ID: i fight everyone.

ID: but when you're reaching for your gun you're fucked!

RS: | You can Do All Sorts of Tricks with Them | ! | More Glamorously than With Psi | Hadean | =:P |

VA: BuT I have mŏre use fŏr a differenT kind ŏf weapŏn

ID: i can do anything with my psi that you can do with a gun. =:P

LL: How's that different from reaching for a SWORD?

RS: | Well | Yes | RS: | But When You are Using Your Psionics | There's Always a Bit of a Pause | Isn't It | ? |

ID: depends?

RS: | Can You Spin It Sixty Times in a Minute | ? |

ID: ...depends?

RS: | Er | That is to Say | You Said You can Copy Any Trick with a Gun | With Your Psionics | RS: | And I Sincerely Doubt You can Spin Your Psionics | =:P |

ID: jokes on you. =:P

LL: Psi's pretty COOL, tbh. My ID's got some sick pink psionics going on, they look pretty EPIC. LL: But I'm pretty sure I could get any psion with a BULLET in the PAN before they could crush me with their SPONGES or whatever it is they do.

LL: And, LOL

LL: RS has a POINT!

ID: is that id just. the telekinetic kind? stock psi model?

LL: Are there different KINDS?

VA: LŏTs

ID: ahahah.

LL: Oh, shit. I thought it was just, like LL: COLORS

ID: you innocent teal child.

ID: fuck no!

ID: i can't lift shit with my mind!

VA: I knŏw a guy whŏ can breaThe fire

LL: I mean, I know CERULEANS got weird shit, and CLOWNS have emotion stuff.

RS: | Your ID has pink psionics | ? |

LL: Whaaaat

TC: Fuck clow~s

LL: And I GUESS, RS. They're not, like, PINK pink.

LL: More like magenta?

LL: Does that MEAN something??

VA: Dŏes iT?

ID: fuck if i know. mine are usually just plain ol dark maroon.

RS: | Hahaha | It Means He has a Great Deal of Misfortune | in Both His Naming | and His Colours | =:B |

LL: What's THAT mean?

RS: | The Colours don't Mean Anything | RS: | Mine are White | ! |

LL: Why's that mean he's UNLUCKY, though?

VA: Iunnŏ, because magenTa is a high-visibiliTy cŏlŏr?

LL: Huh! LL: That's TRUE.

LL: ... He, like, works in an OFFICE, though. LL: I'm p sure it doesn't really MATTER.

RS: | Oh | RS: | I knew a Troll | named ID | with Similar Coloured Psionics | RS: | And | He's Dead | That's All | ! | RS: | It's an Unfortunate Coincidence | =:B |

RS: | That's All |

LL: Oh, SHIT.

LL: Man, that's bad VIBES.

RS: | Isn't It | ? | RS: | Yours Sounds More Reputable | Though | ! | Offices are Nice | RS: | Hardly any Culling There |

LL: Besides, ID's just his HANDLE, not his NAME.

TC: Awkward

ID: boringgg.

VA: ThaT is an unfŏrTunaTe cŏincidence

LL: Dude, fake ID, if YOU had pink psi you'd be freaking, don't even FRONT.

ID: offices btw, not culling of friends.

LL: Oh, mb.

RS: | Hahaha | Not a Friend | Thankfully | RS: | And | Yes | But | On Less Superstitious Topics | RS: | | VA |

RS: | and | TC |

TC: What

RS: | What Colour are Your Psionics | ? |

RS: | Since ID and I | have Already Shared | ! |

ID: va is a flatscan.

TC: They do~'t have a color.

VA: I dŏn'T have any

RS: | We are Educating LL | So | RS: | | Oh |

TC: ! just touch th!~gs

RS: | I'm Sorry to Hear That | ! |

TC: A~d the~ they just - do the th!~g

RS: | Oh | The Thing | ? |

ID: ps pheres most flatscans don't like to be told i'm sorry about them being flatscans.

VA: Eh, iT happens

VA: IT wŏulda made wŏrk easier, buT I wasn'T sŏ lucky

LL: Dude, I don't have psi, and it's no big DEAL.

RS: | Oh | ! | Well | Ah |

LL: Besides, don't you, like WRECK with WEAPONS like you were on about?

RS: | I Apologise | VA | RS: | Even if You Don't Mind |

ID: ahahah you're teal.

LL: I still think my guns're LOADS better.

ID: of course it's not a fucking big deal.

TC: ! speed the decay t!me of objects, RS

VA: IT's differenT fŏr lŏwblŏŏds T'nŏT have psii

ID: eww tc.

LL: How's it DIFFERENT?

RS: | If It Helps | My Psionics are Hardly Worth Having | Haha | RS: | They're Barely There | Really | ! | I Spark a Little More than LL | Maybe | =:) |

TC: Shut up !D

ID: man when did it turn in to psionic share hour.

ID: because it is ll. you have value in society other than being a psi.

VA: Because sŏ many ŏf us Dŏ have psii, ThaT Thŏse whŏ dŏn'T are kinda unusual

RS: | When You Failed to Give a More Engaging Topic | RS: | Than the Murder Hour Happening in the Main Lobby |

LL: IDK, I think it's pretty COOL. LL: I didn't even know you could DO shit like mess with TIME.

RS: | =:P |

LL: That's HELLA trippy.

AC: .u. it happens

AC: some psiionics are very strange

LL: Oh, shit, it's the sorry guy.

LL: Hey, what's UP?

RS: | ? | ? | ? |

ID: okay, better subject than psi!

ID: is every loser here going to the fair?

VA: Aye

ID: no nerd history talk allowed in your answer.

AC: Ø .u. the nice weather, there are some very pretty clouds overhead. Ø

LL: NAH, but only to the LOSER part.

TC: !'m go!~g to k!ck AH's ass

AC: Ø I keep trying to find lusus shapes in them Ø

LL: Is EVERYONE gonna go fight?

TC: Yes

VA: I'm gŏnna sell weapŏns and armŏr

LL: And shit, u rite, AC

LL: u rite

ID: wait which one is ah.

AC: Ø I'm going with Pheres Ø

TC: The blue o~e

AC: Ø To help him sell stuff! Ø

ID: oh gliese.

LL: Oh, the one that's got a halberd up her WASTECHUTE.

ID: don't fight gliese gliese is my cheerleader.

LL: Dude, TOTALLY fight her.

ID: i need her waving pompoms for me and shit.

VA: FighT her

ID: ye olde medieval cheerleader.

LL: What if I wave the pompoms?

AC: Ø .n. gosh, everyone always mentions Gliese but I've never met her Ø

TC: !'m go!~g to punch them !~ the gut t!l they vom!t l!ke RR d!d earl!er

AC: Ø maybe that's a good thing though? Most people don't seem to like her. Ø

ID: you don't even know the routine ll.

LL: I can make a BETTER one, DUH.

RS: | Haha | AC | Be Glad |

ID: tc no fighting gliese.

RS: | Was She Dreadful to You | LL | ? |

LL: And idk, AC, I kinda LIKED her until she started being SHITTY for, like, NO REASON!

TC: Shut up !D

AC: Ø Oh, that's too bad .n. Ø

AC: Ø I hope she wasn't too awful Ø

LL: Like I ASKED what her issue was and she wouldn't even SAY.

AC: Ø .n. Ø

ID: seriously. no fighting gliese.

VA: She's jusT anŏTher blueblŏŏd

LL: It's, like, if you're gonna be WEIRD, at least OWN it.

RS: | Oh | That's Unfortunate | I'm Sorry |

TC: St!ll go!~g to f!ght her

RS: | | Hadean | Ah | Are You especially Fond of Her | ? | RS: | I wasn't Aware |

LL: It's NBD but I'm TOTALLY cheering for TC.

ID: i said no fighting gliese. got a problem with it, take it up with me at the fair. and i will dissuade you.

AC: Ø .n. Ø

ID: she fed me.

AC: Ø Um Ø

ID: that buys my loyalty for like. a perigee.

LL: Dude, I will buy you a food TRUCK.

TC: !'ll f!ght you too

VA: Have sŏme mŏre pride

AC: Ø Who's everyone friendly with though? Ø

ID: come at me tc. make sure you can't rot shit ever again.

RS: | Heavens | Am I Expected to Feed You at the Fair | ? | RS: | Because | If So | RS: | I suppose You should Tell Me Your Coffee Preferences |

VA: I dŏn'T mind mŏsT ŏf Th'lŏwblŏŏds I've meT

AC: Ø .u. Pheres makes good coffee Ø

LL: I'm friendly with YOU, I think. >:D And ID, obvi. My ID, I mean. LL: IDK. LL: I guess I'm here to make FRIENDS.

ID: i don't drink coffee.

RS: | Why Not | ? |

ID: does nothing for me.

TC: Fuck!~g come at me

LL: Mine all up and SPLIT or DIED, so I don't, like, KNOW anyone anymore.

AC: Ø .n. that's really sad Ø

RS: | Oh | That's Unfortunate |

ID: i'm telling you to come at me tc.

AC: Ø I really hope you make lots of new friends!! You seem really energetic and fun. Ø

ID: you wanna fight gliese, you fight me first.

RS: | Come to the Fair | and Visit with Maidel and I | RS: | And Hadean | RS: | I am Sure We Can Direct You towards People You are Suited For |

TC: K

RS: | Assuming Hadean is Not Busy Fighting | the Entirety of the Fair |

LL: THANKS, I think!

ID: glad we got that settled!

AC: Ø Yes! Come visit our booth. ^w^ Ø

RS: | Aren't You Saving Yourself for Emerel's Fight | Hadean | ? | Haha |

LL: And HELL yeah. I'll bring you a SWORD and shit, even. LL: Since you all are into that shit.

MN: ;)

AC: Ø .n. you think? I really meant to be nice. Ø

TC: !'ll take a sword

RS: | Oh | ! | Yes | Please Do |

ID: i mean like i need my all to fight punching bag.

RS: | Come Buy a Sword | TC | I sell Hundreds | =:B |

LL: Dude, I only got ONE sword, sorry.

MN: you should dEfinitEly buy a sword from .PHERES.

RS: | | Not Hundreds | I think I Only Have Thirty on Hand Right Now | Actually |

ID: got plenty in reserves to fight tc!

VA: I'll meeT y'all fŏr a drink if y'wanT

LL: 31, now!

ID: and ll if she really wants to fight gliese.

VA: RS are yŏu a blacksmiTh?

LL: Hell no, I ain't fighting anyone unless they take a swing FIRST.

LL: Then I shoot 'em in the HEAD.

RS: | Haha | No | I am Not | ! | RS: | I am |

RS:

MN: whoa whoa whos fighting .GLIESE.

RS: | Um |

ID: great. noted ll.

TC: !'m mak!~g a 'Let's f!ght AH' Group, who wa~ts !~

ID: no one is fighting gliese.

ID: unless they fight me first.

MN: sorry but .I.m obligatEd to bE on .GLIESES. sidE for this onE so

TC: !'ll host the meet!~gs to pla~ !t

RS: | Emerel |

RS: | Really | ? | Haha |

MN: wEll who ElsE will watch star wars with .ME.

ID: yeah he and gliese are star wars nerd buddies too.

AC: Ø .u. those are fun movies Ø

AC: Ø I prefer the books though Ø

AC: Ø So much extra cool stuff! Ø

MN: .I. dont haVE timE for thE books usually

AC: Ø That's fair! I mean, some of them aren't very well written. .u. Ø

LL: What's STAR WARS?

AC: Ø Oh! It's about trolls rebelling against a fake, usurping Empire. .u. Ø

AC: Ø And restoring peace to the rightful one. Ø

RS: | Haha | Well | I Suppose I can't Object to Movies |

LL: Is it, like, all POLITICAL, or is it the COOL kinda rebellion?

AC: Ø It's kind of cheesy, but it's fun Ø

MN: rEally though MN: whosE thE rEal monstEr hErE whEn you brEak it down

RS: | Star Wars is a Film with Fantastic Fashion |

AC: Ø It's super cool! They blow stuff up and there's aliens and it's fun. Ø

RS: | That is What It Is |

MN: hEy .PHERES. wanna cosplay as stormtroopErs

AC: Ø And some of them have really cool weapons and psiionics! Ø

MN: complEtE with aiming skills

LL: I'm there for the blowing up and the ALIENS

LL: FASHION'S alright, I GUESS, but that's, like, not MY thing.

AC: Ø There's lots of aliens. .u. I'm kind of surprised the Empire let a film be made with so many alien characters! Ø

AC: Ø But I'm glad they did, a lot of the aliens are really weird and interesting looking. Ø

ID: i mean i wear a t-shirt and jeans every day of my life so. what's fashion.

RS: | Unfortunately | I am Matching with Maidel | =:( |

MN: it was a timE pEriod whEn wE wErE still ExpErimEnting with moViE ElEmEnts

RS: | But You are Free to Join Us | ! |

ID: except when i'm pheres' booth babe, then i'm wearing. white?

MN: .I.m not wEaring thE dElivEry uniform

RS: | | And | Ah | Hadean | RS: | Don't Forget | I am Dressing You as Well | So | That will Give You Practically a Written Definition of It | ! |

RS: | It Being Fashion |

RS: | Not White |

RS: | | I could Put You in White | Though |

LL: Are you watching at the FAIRE?

ID: i'm fine with not white. =:I

MN: .I. stand by my statEmEnt that whitE sucks

AC: Ø .n. but Pheres looks nice in white Ø

RS: | Hmm | How Pale are You | ? |

LL: White's good if it's the kind that GLOWS at a RAVE.

VA: WhiTe is beTTer fŏr hŏT climaTes

ID: i got plenty of tats. are tattoos fashion.

MN: oh .I. didnt say hE doEsnt look nicE in whitE bEcausE hE doEs

MN: its just a shitty color

LL: Tats are DEF fashion

AC: Ø .u. oh okay - pfff Ø

RS: | White is a Perfectly Good Colour | Emerel | RS: | The Best Colour | Really |

AC: Ø Emerel you're goofy Ø

MN: no it isnt stop that

RS: | But | Thank You for the Compliment | Both of You | =:P |

ID: well pheres i'm partially tattooed.

LL: I'm like 70% sure it's not actually a REAL COLOR.

MN: hE startEd it maidEl MN: with his whitE shirts

ID: so i'm partially always pale.

LL: Like BLACK and WHITE aren't colors, right?

MN: that stick out in thE dark

AC: Ø I guess he did, that's true u.u Ø

RS: | Marvelous | I will Have to Find Something to Show Those Off | Then |

ID: i mean i have them on my chest and back and arms.

AC: Ø Pheres, you started it all, I guess Emerel has a point there. How dare you wear nice shirts. Ø

VA: WaiT, dŏ yŏu have whiTe TaTTŏŏs ID?

MN: wEll that sEttlEs it MN: hadEan is going into this shirtlEss now

ID: well they're not stark white.

RS: | Heavens | ! | RS: | Well | Emerel | Am I at Least Allowed to Wear Terrible Shirts | or | Do I have to Eschew all Shirts | to Meet Your Standards | ? | =:) |

VA: ThaT's a cŏŏl idea. ShiT my nexT ŏne may have Tŏ be whiTe nŏw

MN: wEEEEEll

MN: .I. could answEr that but wErE in public ;)

LL: I think we're making it WEIRD again.

RS: | Hahaha | Not at All | RS: | Why would You Think That | ? |

ID: warning whtie fades like a motherfuck.

ID: you need to get them redone a lot.

RS: | Oh | Hm |

LL: Because MN totally just was like "Bluh bluh my answer is NSFW, bluh," dude.

RS: | Maybe You would be Well-Suited to Gray | Then | ! |

RS: | | I Mean | RS: | You could Interpret It That Way | RS: | If You are Weird |

AC: Ø .u. I like the shirt Pheres had designed for my uniform Ø

VA: I dŏn'T mind

AC: Ø It's very nice Ø

RS: | But I am Not | RS: | And Subsequently Did Not |

AC: Ø I like the red Ø

LL: There was a WINKY FACE!

RS: | Perhaps He Has Something In His Eye |

MN: ;)))

LL: Oh my god, I hate ALL OF YOU. D:

ID: i know a good guy va. if you can stand fish.

AC: Ø .n. I tried, LL Ø

ID: and him wanting you to smoke questionable herbs with him.

MN: wEll you arE thE onE in .OUR. chat so

LL: AC is my bro and the rest of you SUCK.

AC: Ø nooo, they don't suck Ø

MN: nobodys making you stay ll

AC: Ø they just um Ø

VA: I can fŏr The sake ŏf a gŏŏd TaTTŏŏ VA: My currenT guy is greaT, buT he's Teal

AC: Ø are affectionate Ø

AC: Ø they're very nice .u. Ø

RS: | Oh | Don't Run Them Off | Emerel | RS: | I Like Them | They are Endearing |

LL: And hell no, I'm not going to the chat with AH. LL: She wants my BLOOD.

ID: my guy is great, but he does uh. the thing where they do all the pokes with a hand needle. not a gun.

ID: so it takes for fucking ever.

AC: Ø ...I think she said she left? Looking at her last message. Ø

RS: | My Apologies for Causing You Discomfort | LL | ! |

VA: My arm was dŏne ThaT way

VA: Yeah, Takes a lifeTime and a half

RS: | We will Contain Our Japery | in Light of That | =:B |

LL: I mean. LL: There's nobody in that chat ANYWAYS, and I'm trying to hang out with PEOPLE.

MN: .I.m not MN: just pointing out that thEyrE not actually supposEd to bE in this chat tEchnically MN: so if wErE wEirding thEm out thats thEir fault not ours

AC: Ø beep boop I am secretly a robot. .u. Ø

AC: Ø boop boop whirr Ø

ID: looks good as fuck though!

LL: :\

ID: and i find it helps keep them looking nice longer. could just be my opinion though.

VA: Yeah, my arm was dŏne by an ŏrangeblŏŏd guy in a remŏTe area

MN: maidEl why are you a robot

AC: Ø .n. but I like LL, Emerel Ø

VA: Super greaT guy, I hŏpe he's sTill alive

AC: Ø oh I was just um Ø

LL: I USED to have a tat, but I had to get it get RID of.

AC: Ø I was making a joke, LL said they wanted to talk to people Ø

LL: Omfg

MN: thEn MN: likE ll MN: .I. wasnt tElling you not to maidEl

AC: Ø so I was being not a person a.k.a a robot Ø

RS: | Well | I Mean | They're Teal | RS: | I think They are Technically Allowed to Be Wherever They Want | ? |

ID: well that sucks ll. why?

LL: I TOTALLY didn't get that. LL: RIP, AC can't be my bro anymore. D:<

AC: Ø oh, I just - hahah .u. Ø

LL: JK, dude, don't even FLIP.

AC: Ø discriminatiooon Ø

AC: Ø no, I know you're joking .u. Ø

LL: And damn STRAIGHT I can be where I want! LL: Mostly cos I've got INSIDER CONNECTIONS, though.

ID: and it sucks when an artist dies on you va.

RS: | Robots Deserve the Disease of Friendship | Too | LL | =:B |

LL: And I had to get rid of the tat cos it's a huge, like, ID thing.

AC: Ø I know I'm bad at jokes sometimes but I got that one .u. Ø

LL: My line of work gets you on people's SHITLIST, you dig?

VA: ŏhh I see

ID: hahah. did you get your horns shaved down too?

LL: Yeah!

VA: ThaT's ŏdd fŏr a highblŏŏd

AC: Ø .n. did it hurt? Ø

ID: smart if you want to not be recognized.

VA: ŏr waiT, is iT nŏT ŏdd where yŏu live?

LL: Like a grubfucker!

AC: Ø whoa Ø

VA: Really?????

LL: And it's not THAT odd. I'm not the ONLY one I know, leastways!

AC: Ø you must be really tough! Ø

LL: HELL yeah! >:D

VA: Are yŏu dŏing iT righT?

ID: like. horns and sign and bloodcolor are your biggest identifiers!

LL: I mean, YEAH, but, dude, I had a LOTTA horn to knock off.

AC: Ø dang Ø

ID: so if you want to be sneaky you gotta get that shit taken care of.

VA: My rail shaves his and dŏesn'T geT pain VA: Unless iT jusT sTŏps hurTing afTer a while

LL: ^^^^^

LL: It don't hurt to, like shave 'em down a BIT on the regular, nowanights!

ID: i wonder what would happen if i shaved my floating horn.

ID: huh.

VA: His are like. Two, Three inches Tall

LL: First time when you're chopping off like a whole HEAD'S worth's a different STORY.

VA: AfTer shaving

RS: | Oh | It Hurts like Mad | the First Time You Cut Them Off |

RS: | But | It gets Easier After That | ! |

LL: Also, dude, WTF @ floating horn???

VA: I had nŏ clue. I knŏw iT hurTs like hell Tŏ break a hŏrn

ID: what you don't have a floating horn.

LL: Yeah, see, RS gets it!

LL: No, I got a floating MIDDLE FINGER for that HOOFBEASTSHIT.

AC: Ø I'm glad mine aren't too big. .u. Ø

RS: | Hahaha |

ID: i mean others can back up my floating horn claim.

AC: Ø it's true .u. Ø

RS: | He Does Have One | RS: | It is a Psionic Thing |

ID: all the coolest kids have one.

AC: Ø yup Ø

RS: | And | Be Glad | Maidel | ! | It is a Pain | Unfortunately |

LL: What happens when you're ASLEEP?

AC: Ø Big horns look really impressive but I can believe that. Ø

ID: yeah it keeps going.

LL: Or if someone, like, HITS it?

MN: at lEast your horns look grEat .PHERES.

LL: Like with a BAT or something.

ID: man i don't let people hit my horns.

LL: But what if they DID?

VA: Caring fŏr big hŏrns is hard Thŏugh

ID: i don't fucking know.

LL: It's never EVER happened?

RS: | They Do | But the Neck Pain is Awful | And | You can Never Lie on Your Back| For Starters | =:C |

RS: | And | Oh | Thank You | Em | ❤ |

AC: Ø .N. oh jeez Ø

VA: I shŏuld shave mine acTually...If They grŏw mŏre I wŏn'T be able Tŏ reach The Tŏps

ID: it's kinda a hard target. to hit my middle horn and not hit the main pair.

VA: CŏmfŏrTably

AC: Ø that's awful, Pheres Ø

RS: | Shave Them | VA | Before You have to Cut Them Instead | RS: | And | Haha | That's Why I Keep Mine so Short Now |

ID: wait you're supposed to be able to reach the tips of your horns. missed that memo.

VA: IT's easier fŏr me Tŏ care fŏr Them if I can

RS: | How do You Keep Them Polished | Hadean | RS: | If They are Too Long | ? |

VA: LasT Time my hŏrns were Tŏŏ Tall ŏne gŏT snapped ŏff

ID: polish.

ID: do i look like i have time and money for that.

MN: EVEr triEd making a homEmadE brEw

MN: its not that hard

RS: | | Brew | ? |

RS: | Are You Making Beer Now | ? |

VA: ŏh, hŏw dŏ yŏu make a hŏmemade pŏlish

LL: HELL yeah!

LL: Oh, shit, wait, actual POLISH.

LL: Nm, I've only done SUNSHINE.

ID: i don't bother. my horns stay alright?

VA: Sunshine is greaT Tŏ keep hidden away fŏr a bad nighT

RS: | Oh | You should Get Them Properly Polished at the Fair | ! |

MN: no .I. mEant polish

RS: | They'll Look Lovely | Especially Given Your Length |

ID: i dunno. maybe if i have time to kill.

ID: i don't let trolls touch the headgear too much.

ID: since that's just asking for some middle horn fondling.

LL: Omfg

LL: Dude, he's got a POINT.

LL: I bet someone would just, like, try and MOVE it just to see if it GOES.

RS: | Haha | Oh My | RS: | Heavne Forbid They Touch | Your Mysterious Middle Horn |

MN: gEEz go do your own fondling hadEan

ID: it's the source of my power- stop making it weird.

MN: stop asking the horn polishErs to do it for you

AC: Ø I've never gotten my horns polished before. .u. Ø

RS: | Oh | Really | ? |

MN: .I. haVE no idEa what yourE talking about~

AC: Ø Does it really make them look prettier? Ø

LL: Is it ACTUALLY?

RS: | I'll Do Your Horns | at the Fair | Then |

RS: | It Does | ! | I always Keep Mine Polished | RS: | | Oh | And I'll Sand Them | Too | If You'd Like | ? |

ID: what, no it's not actually my power source.

AC: Ø Oh, that's really nice of you Pheres! Are you sure? .u. Oh, um, if you know best! Gosh, I'm just used to the regular scrubbing and bed checks. Ø

AC: Ø I used to think only highbloods sanded and polished them, hah. Ø

AC: Ø Silly, I know. Ø

RS: | | Or | Well | Hm | RS: | We could Actually Gloss Them | That would Look Nicer | I Think | Given the Angle |

ID: do i get horn service too pheres.

AC: Ø ooh, okay Ø

ID: doesn't your booth babe need to look pretty.

RS: | Haha | Well |

MN: damn .PHERES. bEttEr chargE Extra for that

MN: sorry .I.m going to bEat up your booth babE

ID: attempt to beat me up. ftfy.

MN: will beat you up MN: ftfy

RS: | | I suppose | You will get the Full Horn Service | Hadean | RS: | Heaven Forbid | that You don't Look At Your Best | For Your Fight |

ID: great~ thanks. =:)

RS: | | Do I Get to Do the Middle Horn | Too | ? |

ID: i mean i guess that depends if you can handle some weird sensations.

ID: that sounds wrong-er than it actually is.

RS: | Heavens |

RS: | Hahaha | It only Sounds Wrong | If We do not Pointedly Ignore All Possibility that It Could Be Wrong | =:B |

RS: | Do You Spark if People Touch It | ? |

AC: Ø these aren't the wrongs you're looking for. .u. Ø

AA: yrn wrnongs arne in anothern castle. >:} RS: | Yes | Thank You | Sipa | =:B |

ID: it's kinda like a mild constant shock. hi sip.

AA: sup.

AC: Ø Your wrongs have not been rezzed .u. Ø

ID: fair talk. letting rs get all up on my headgear.

AA: lmfao, wow, phrnasing. AA: arne you gonna let him put beads on yrn horns, tho?? AA: b/c he totally used to do that. >:}

ID: what.

ID: no beads allowed my horns are weird enough. =:I

RS: | He doesn't Have the Grooves for Them | There'd be Nowhere to Hook Them | RS: | Unless We Carved Some In | But | That would Take Ages | Also | Brb | Customer |

AA: ... scrnatch that. no beads. you gonna let him carnve them up?? >:}

ID: hell no, i like my rack as it is. =:I

ID: also do you polish your horns sip. my horns look fine right. because i neglect the fuck out of them.

AA: lameee. why such a cluckbeast, dude?? AA: y, y, beforne fights. not, like, in gen. waaay too much of a bothern. >:} and the polish gets in yrn hairn. grnoss.

AA: and lmao. idk, man, they'rne not, like, flaking, rnight?

ID: i have a floating horn, i don't think my horns need more things for people to look at.

ID: note to pheres when he's back, no polish in my hair if you can.

ID: i mean. no? i never noticed them flaking. =:I

AA: idk, dude, ain't nothing wrnong w/ morne shit to look at. AA: it's what makes you stand out, duh. >:}

AA: have you checked if they'rne flaking??

ID: i think i stand out enough in a crowd already. no beads needed. =:P

ID: how do i check for flaking? not like i can reach most of my rack.

TC: !'ll look at them for you

ID: you won't be looking at anything once i'm done with you. hush up.

AA: rub 'em on a trnee and see if anything comes off?? that's what phern used to do. >:} AA: and lmaooo.

TC: Fuck ~o

AA: wow, hads, she's, like, trnyin' to be helpful. way 2bmean.

ID: i'm supposed to fight her so no she isn't.

ID: i don't know where to find trees in this stupid place.

TC: Shhhh let me help !D

ID: fuck off. =:I

AA: haha, shiiit, how many folks you fighting tonight??

ID: i mean i'm fighting them at the fair. tonight is my night off. i even got a hotel room, i get to use an actual shower. shit's gonna be great.

AA: bump 'em on a carnt, then. >:} orn, like, idefk, anything harnd?? AA: but not T O O harnd, you don't wanna snap 'em. AA: unless horn-grnizzled veternan is yrn aesthetic.

TC: !'m go!~g to shove !D's head u~der a horse wh!le !t takes a p!ss

ID: hmm. first attempt seems to result in no flaking and jeesh tc, gross and desperate.

AA: then yrn fiiiiiiine. they look fine, anyway. >:P AA: why arne you wornrnrying abt yrn horns, anyway?? AA: also, lmao, am i like AA: internrnupting, orn is tc just hella nasty? >:}

ID: so nasty.

ID: and because everyone was talking about horns and polishes and shit. =:I apparently i was the only weirdo not spending hours preening every night. so i want to see what i'm missing out on.

TC: Shut up !D

ID: how about no. and you shut up.

TC: Go fuck yourself

AA: ehh. phern's just a weirndo. he polishes his claws, too, dude. you gonna do that? >:} AA: and hahahaha, wowzerns. AA: tc, bb, calm yrn tits. like, spoilern alernt!

AA: but i am p surne he's just not that into you. AA: orn hornse piss. >:P

TC: AA please, !'m ~ot !~terested !~ h!m

TC: ! just wa~t to see h!m scream a l!ttle

TC: !~ horror

ID: is there any part of your body you can't polish? hey, maybe i'll let him polish my claws if he wants. i can look all shiny and new for like. five seconds.

ID: 1, you're weird, 2, not happening.

AA: n, prnobs not. rnoll arnound in oil and polish A L L T H E B I T S. AA: shit, if you ask, he's prnobs got that glitterny shit you dunk yrnself in.

AA: and - did i alrneady say lmao?? AA: bc lmao, W O W.

AC: Ø Glittery? .u. Ø

ID: i'm good without glitter. but hey. a little pampering never killed a troll, right? right.

AA: y. until you end up, like, in white up to yrn frnonds. >:} AA: and y!

AA: glitterny.

AA: like, y'know, sparnklernocks.

AC: Ø I never realized anyone put glitter on their horns, huh Ø

AC: Ø How long does it stay on? Ø

ID: hey, pheres said no white. and hey, get glittered up if you want ac. have to ask pheres for that info i bet.

RS: | Let Me Duck Over Here | However | ! | RS: | Because | Also | There is the Minor Matter of the Fact | RS: | Throwing Someone's Matesprit into a Conversation Erring on Pitch Flirtation |

RS: | is Not a Typical Means of |- DISSUASION -|

RS: | =:1 |

ID: remember she can usually spy in here.

ID: it totally works. what did you want me to say, stop this is icky? because, uh. definitely still fighting him. don't need to give him ammo.

ID: but scout's honor, definitely not pitch for the guy i couldn't even pick out of a crowd!

RS: | You Literally just Informed Me | That It is Entirely Possible to Tell Someone to Back Off | If They are Making You Experience Discomfort |

RS: | Is that Advice You are Evidently Unwilling to Follow Yourself | ? |

ID: someone you are definitely not going to fight, yeah.

ID: unless you want to fight me.

RS: | Yes | I am Dying to Fight You | You have Cracked The Case |

RS: | =:| |

LL: Dude, ID, it just sounds like you were kinda shoving your CARTILAGE NUB where it didn't BELONG.

LL: Like, this is usually the part where you say sorry and CHILL OUT instead of, like, making a weird THING out of it.

ID: thank you for your totally well informed opinion ll.

LL: I mean, I fuck up shit like that all the TIME.

RS: | Haha | Well | She isn't Incorrect |

LL: I don't KNOW you guys really well, and I don't know what HAPPENED

LL: So maybe PHERES needs to chill, too.

LL: But I'm saying GENERALLY.

RS: | I am Afraid You are Now Less Correct | =:P |

ID: well sorry~ and as for what just happened earlier. i tried to keep my flap closed and you encouraged me! so.

LL: I might be TOTALLY wrong, idk. LL: You guys just seemed kinda way more CHILL earlier, and you're both cool dudes.

LL: So I dunno why it has to be a BIG DEAL.

RS: | It is Not a Big Deal | RS: | I am Not Particularly Affronted | I am Merely Curious | as to What Hadean's Motives are In His Behaviours | That is All |

RS: | And | I Accept Your Apology | Although | I Encouraged You | RS: | Because I Was Not Expecting You to Actually | RS: | | Well | ! | I Thought We were Playing | Joking | Japing | That is All | =:1 |

ID: nope, that was definitely me trying to be nice and keep my flap shut.

RS: | | If You are Trying to Keep Your Flap Shut | RS: | Perhaps You should Not Say | That You are Actively Trying to Keep Your Flap Shut | RS: | Usually | We Simply Keep Our Flaps Shut |

RS: | No Need for Narration | Unless You are Orpheo |

ID: i like narration! and is orpheo the dumpster troll.

LL: He's TOTALLY the dumpster troll.

RS: | Yes | Haha | He is the Dumpster Troll |

ID: do i. want to know why others call him weeds.

RS: | Probably Not |

LL: I mean, guy that talks like THAT, he probably smokes BALES.

ID: well that's a lovely mental image.

RS: | Oh | Come Now | Smoking a Bale is not Historically Accurate |

RS: | I am Sure He Grinds It into a Fine Powder and Puts It in A Pipe |

ID: is that a thing you can do?

RS: | I do not Have the Faintest Idea | Haha | ! |

LL: That is

LL: NOT how you do it.

ID: damn ll you need to teach us clearly.

LL: lol

ID: in case i ever. want to see how well getting high works i guess.

LL: I mean, if you're freaking PULVERIZING IT, you're losing half the good shit! LL: Unless you're the kinda weirdo that goes licking it off the PESTLE, I guess.

ID: heavens forbid.

LL: Shit, I confused which RUSTBLOOD was TALKING for a sec.

ID: how dare you! =:P

RS: | How Very Dare You | =:P |

ID: it doesn't help that we have the same emoticons.

LL: No, dude, keep going, I bet you could do a NUTTY Pheres impression.

ID: i think me and pheres have had enough conflict for the night.

LL: Fair ENOUGH, dude.

ID: besides, pheres is like. one of the three or four trolls on here that hasn't threatened to kill me or wanted to hear me scream in horror or shit so i should be nicer!

LL: Duuuude, wtf?

LL: Don't people come to chatrooms to, like, MEET people to HANG OUT with?

LL: Why is everyone, like, FIGHTING and shit?

ID: i have a charming personality. =:P

LL: I dunno, man, you seem pretty COOL to me!

ID: and told tc no killing gliese. which has forever put me on her hitlist i guess.

LL: Oh, RIGHT, I remember that. LL: I don't get why GLIESE is all het up at me, neither, but I don't want her DEAD.

LL: She's just some RANDO on the internet.

ID: i dunno. something about you and calling the jades fakers. maybe she has a jade quad or something.

RS: | He does have a Charming Personality | And | Oh | She probably got Het Up on Emerel's Behalf |

ID: yeah they do seem close.

RS: | He does Like to Go On about How Unusual Jades Are | RS: | So | She likely Felt Offended at the Implication of | | People Faking Their Caste | ? |

LL: LOL

LL: Dude, I've TOTALLY done that before.

LL: It gets you IN places!

RS: | I should Clarify | Hadean | the Charming did not Hold Scarequotes | RS: | Despite Your Many Slights |

RS: | | Should You Admit That Online | ? | Haha |

ID: good to know because i was about to offer to not show my face around you at the faire.

LL: Pffft LL: I mean, it was FOREVER ago. LL: If you wanna call the COPS on me for something I did as a WIGGLER, go ahead, but I bet I got more cop friends than YOU. >:D

LL: Oh, shit, WHAT?

RS: | What | ? | No | Of Course You Should | RS: | Why wouldn't I Want You at the Faire | ? |

ID: because i'm a jerk?

LL: No, dude, we're hanging out and I'm buying you, like. FOOD and shit like you wanted. LL: You can't go avoiding PHERES, though, cos I'm chillin' with him, TOO.

RS: | Oh | You're Aggravating | But You're hardly a Jerk | RS: | And | Besides | I like Sipara Perfectly Well | And | Compared to Her | RS: | You are a Perfectly Docile Meowbeast |

ID: well i mean if food is involved. =:P can i have like. four of those giant gobblebeast legs. those are a thing at faires right.

LL: Dude, if it FITS in you, you can have it. LL: I have, like, WAY too much cash rn, idgaf. LL: Bring your HOLLOW WALKFROND.

ID: and well. yeah. fair. I'm not so aggro i put it right in my tag though! so sip got me beat there.

ID: sweet. =:D jokes on you like 75 percent of me is hollow.

RS: | ! | ! | ! |

LL: Between the floating HORN shit and the weird PSIONICS, I am only like 50% sure you're shitting me, here.

RS: | Congratulations | LL | RS: | I am Fairly Certain | That is the First Time I have Witnessed | an =:D smiley |

ID: oh so if i'm not a stock model psi i'm weird i see how it is.

ID: =:P at you pheres. food'll make anyone smile.

LL: Omg

LL: I made HISTORY, apparently!

LL: >:D

RS: | =:) |

LL: That SUCKS about Gliese, though. LL: Should I, like, TELL her I wasn't calling that guy a FAKER? LL: I was just saying WHAT IF cos people were on about how it was even POSSIBLE and shit. Doesn't mean nothing to me either WAY if a jade's a dude or even a JADE in the first place.

ID: don't let it go to your head. =:P

ID: uh protip: don't defend why you said things when you're apologizing.

LL: Too LATE, dude, my horns already GREW BACK.

RS: | Mm | I would Advise Against Telling Gliese Anything | RS: | But | If You really Wish to Get on Good Terms With Her |

RS: | Just Say that You're Sorry | You were Wrong | and Do not Focus on the Details |

ID: 'sorry, but-' conversations just end in more fighting. so yeah.

RS: | And | Then Move On | While She is Basking in the Feeling of having Socially Bested You |

RS: | She'll Forget about Her Ire | Soon Enough |

ID: yeah definitely do it where others can distract from the conversation.

LL: I guess that makes SENSE. LL: Then how do I know not to do it AGAIN, though?

RS: | Mm | ! |

LL: If I don't ASK.

LL: Not that she wanted to ANSWER, I guess.

RS: | | Ah |

RS: | Just | Watch What She Says | and Make Sure You only Agree With Her | ? | ? |

LL: I mean, I'm gonna just do what you SAID. LL: You guys got your shit resolved really NEAT-like, so you probs KNOW better.

LL: What, like about EVERYTHING?

LL: I don't care THAT much about her!

RS: | Not on Everything | She doesn't Get Aggressive over Everything | I Don't Expect |

RS: | Just the Things that Send Her Off into a Froth |

RS: | I don't Know | I Make Lists | Usually | of Contentious Topics | for the Individual | RS: | You could Do That | =:/ |

ID: no talking about faking or jades.

ID: should cover it.

LL: Ugh. LL: I guess I can TRY that, but if she starts getting WEIRD about shit then I'm gonna STOP.

LL: ID's thing sounds less hard to keep TRACK of.

ID: making a list of topics to avoid for everyone in the chat sounds like a pain pheres.

LL: ^^^

ID: but then i like. can barely remember most of their names so i guess i'm a shitty judge.

RS: | Not for Everyone in the Chat | Haha | RS: | Or | Most People in the Chat | Just | Quadrants | RS: | Close Friends | Enclades |

RS: | | Although | Making Ones for Chat Members does Seem Wise | RS: | Now that You Mention It |

RS: | You should Tell Me about Your Pet Peeves | The Both of You | Right Now | =:P |

ID: is your clade big or anything then? what about you ll?

ID: jeesh pheres put some trolls on the spot.

LL: LOL

LL: Mine's pretty SMALL! I just got my best guy and my moirail.

LL: Clydes ain't IN chats like this, though, and ID's the MOD.

LL: And, uhhh

RS: | No | Emerel's Kismesis is Gone | And | He never Let Me Meet Him |- Anyway -| RS: | So | He doesn't Count | Haha | Sipara has Her Ever-Rotating Kismesises | RS: | Riccin is an Old Clademate | But | Ah | The Rest of Them are Dead |

RS: | So | I don't Have to Keep Track of |- THEM -| Anymore | Haha |

LL: I get pissed off when people mess with my PEOPLE! LL: And when they get shirty and then get all CAGEY when I ask what their DAMAGE is. :\

ID: ll a lot of trolls in this chat are gonna annoy you.

LL: Gdi

LL: It's cool, YOU guys can be my bros. LL: And, like, that MAIDEL person.

LL: They're pretty cool.

ID: i cannot for the best of me remember which one maidel is.

ID: dr?

LL: The GREEN one that always says sorry! LL: Olive green, not JADE.

RS: | Oh | ! | Yes | Maidel is Practically Clade |

RS: | She is the Olive Green | Yes | Haha |

LL: Man, there's a lotta sorry GREENBLOODS around.

RS: | It's a Part of the Caste | I suppose | ! | RS: | The Ones outside of the Caverns are not a Very Confident Lot |

LL: Makes SENSE, I guess, if you grew up under a ROCK.

LL: CAVE, whatever.

ID: i kinda avoid talking to her. she seems so easy to set off. and then she leaves and that's no fun for her. =:/

LL: I mean, she should learn to DEAL with it better, then! LL: Like it doesn't matter how NICE people are, they're gonna say something shitty EVENTUALLY.

LL: So you gotte be able to CALL 'em on it or tell them to fuck OFF.

LL: Or have a quad to do it FOR you.

RS: | Oh | ! | Ah | RS: | He is Easier in Person | to Anticipate If He is Upset | ? |

RS: | He is just Very Shy | Mostly | But | Haha | Yes |

ID: i mean i agree but yeah. figure it'd be easier in person.

LL: He??

RS: | | I've been Looking for Her Quadrants | Actually | RS: | I think It would Do Her Good for Her Self-Esteem |

RS: | And | Confidence |

RS: | | He | ? |

ID: you called dr a he. and then a she. confused ll i think.

ID: also ll refresh me on what your name is.

RS: | Oh | They Switch | ! |

RS: | I am not Sure | the Particulars | ? | So | I just Switch | as the Inclination Strikes |

LL: That's CONFUSING as hell.

LL: But WHATEVER, I guess.

ID: means i can't call him/her the wrong gender i guess.

LL: Oh, shit, u rite

LL: Maybe it's LESS confusing, then. >:D

RS: | Hahaha | It is a Socially Fool Proof Strategy | on Her Part |

ID: ll. hand over the name. unless you prefer ll.

ID: but then at the fair people will think your name is ellell.

RS: | If You Prefer LL | That is Fine | Of Course |

RS: | Hahaha |

RS: | One of the Fellows Who Runs It | is Named Elilah |

RS: | LL would Fit Right In | =:) |

LL: Ellell sounds pretty RAD, but I'm BONNIE.

LL: And everyone keeps typing LL all LOWERCASE so it looks like II, ANYWAYS.

ID: bonnie. alright. bonnie is a nice enough name.

LL: Nice ENOUGH? LL: Damn, I SEE how it is! D:<

ID: it's no hadean. =:P

RS: | Hadean | Shame on You |

LL: LUL

RS: | Clearly | Bonnie is at Least A Name | of the Top Five Tiers | RS: | Perhaps the Top Eight | ? | At Least the Top Ten | =:) |

ID: aww i'm just joking pheres. bonnie isn't really offended! i think.

RS: | Below Pheres | Of Course | RS: | But | We can't All Have the Best Name |

ID: how do you even pronounce pheres.

RS: | | How do You Think It is Pronounced | ? |

LL: Dude, my skin's not THAT thin, don't even lfip.

LL: FAIR-iss?

ID: fear-ease?

LL: Or, like, feh-ree.

RS: | Close | Haha | ! | RS: | It is | Fuh | like | Furnace | RS: | And then | Reese | like Breeze |

ID: huh. okay. is bonnie like. bunny with an o?

RS: | But | You should Use Fair-Is | RS: | It is Easier to Say |

LL: I'm like 90% sure there's only ONE way to say Bonnie.

RS: | | Isn't it Bonnie | as In |

RS: | She is quite a Bonny Lass | ? |

LL: Yeah!

ID: hey sometimes people have weird ways of saying their name even when it looks easy.

LL: Shit, I lied. It's totes actually, like uh LL: BONE-AI

RS: | Bone Ai |

RS: | Well | It |- IS -| Six Letters |

ID: well then how do you say my name?

RS: | The same Way that Bonnie Does | I Imagine |

RS: | Ha | as in Laughter | RS: | Dee | as in | Ah | Dice | ? |

RS: | Awn | like Dawn |

ID: nah. but that's how like. everyone assumes i'm sure.

RS: | =:? |

RS: | How do You Pronounce It | ? |

RS: | Is It a Standard Name | ? |

ID: i mean what's standard when it comes to names.

RS: | Oh | No | Standard | As In | RS: | Central Continental Standard Alternian Common Dialect |

RS: | You Know | Standard | Haha |

LL: Wait, is that NOT how you say it?

LL: HADEAN, I mean

ID: like...

H as in hi, long a like. base. d as in dye. a as in about. and an n. like. no.

ID: like. hey-de-an?

ID: it's easier to just say and have a troll repeat.

ID: also sorry for the pause, was ransacking the snack bar in the room next to me.

RS: | Hopefully | They weren't In It | at the Time | Haha |

RS: | Hadean is a Pretty Name | Though | ! |

ID: nah, most trolls have cleared out. probably to parties and their loved ones or whatever.

ID: pheres is a nice name too. is the fuh-reese way you say it?

SA: haydee-in, bonny, phair-Rees, was how I was reading them until corrected. You all have such different names.

ID: well what about you sa? what's your name?

SA: I don't remember my assigned name. I go by Prisma.

ID: ...assigned name huh. okay. prisma it is.

SA: don't most trolls have their names recorded by the cavern matrons?

ID: i mean most people don't call them assigned? i don't think?

SA: oh. I apologize, I'm not very familiar with the terms. I am very forgetful.

SA: Hadean?

ID: yeah that's me.

RS: | Oh | I got Distracted | My Apologies | That is How I Say My Name | RS: | And | Hm |

RS: | I don't Know If Names get Assigned | ? | I never Thought About It |

RS: | you Just | You Know | Have One |

SA: I see.

SA: So where did your names come from? Did you just know them at the front of your mind?

SA: That sounded rude, i apologize.

ID: don't lusii do that shit.

SA: I was mostly going off of Pheres's statement.

ID: i dunno. i just know i have a name and it rocks.

LA: I LIKE MY NAME!!!

SA: Who are you?

LA: MYSELF

LA: DUH

ID: oh god it's in here too.

LA: AHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!

RS: | Oh | I never Asked | RS: | I Grew up in a Hivestem | Haha | ! |

RS: | So | People have Always Used My Name |

LA: IT'S ARISTE

SA: Ariste.

SA: I like this one.

SA: I see... That sound different, RS.

LA: SOMEONE HERE HAS GOOD TASTE LA: IT'S ABOUT TIME!!!!

RS: | Heavens | You're Enthusiastic | Aren't You | ? |

RS: | And | Haha | Is It | ? | RS: | Where did You Grow Up | ? |

LA: ABOUT WHAT???

RS: | | Everything | from the Sounds of It | ? |

LA: NO I'M PRETTY CHILL TODAY

SA: I meant I liked the name. But the enthusiasm is acceptable too.

SA: I grew up... elsewhere.

SA: It was very private and isolated.

ID: elsewhere is ominous as fuck.

LA: WELL MY NAME IS AWESOME SO I CAN FORGIVE YOU

SA: I was raised on a colony. Is that a less ominous answer.

LA: WAS IT AT LEAST A FUN COLONY

ID: barely.

LA: IS YOUR NAME SA NOW

SA: Ariste thinks it could be fun.

RS: | What Sort of a Colony | ? |

ID: ariste has the intelligence of a sponge.

SA: I don't know how to explain it. I don't recall most of it, either. It was an experimental colony. Scientific.

SA: I suppose that is "fun" in a way.

ID: /oh/.

LA: HOW DO YOU KNOW ID

LA: YOU'VE KNOW ME FOR 20 MINUTES

SA: my name is Prisma, LA.

LA: DO YOU READ MINDS

LA: PRISMA

LA: RAINBOWS AND SHIT

LA: THAT'S COOL

SA: I am clairvoyant and telekinetic.

LA: CONGRATULATIONS

SA: I don't read minds. I simply know things.

LA: I WAS ASKING IF ID READS MINDS THOUGH

SA: i msiread, I apologize.

RS: | Oh | ! |

RS: | I Think You are Our First Telekinetic |

RS: | Congratulations | Haha |

ID: nah i don't read minds. but i can sense idiots.

SA: do all of you have psionics...?

LA: DUH

ID: i think so.

LA: WHO DOESN'T

ID: plenty of trolls.

LA: OOOH ID SENSES IDIOTS LA: SO DO YOU SENSE EVERYONE OR WHAT

SA: i like this.

ID: nah, being around you is like trying to spot the stars when the sun is out. your stupidity blocks everyone else.

SA: LA, I think they were being facetious.

RS: | Yes | I think So | ! |

LA: I THINK THEY'RE BEING CUTE

RS: | Er | To the Fact We All have Psionics |

RS: | Not to the Idiots Thing |

ID: i'm fucking adorable as shit.

LA: COME HERE AND LET ME PINCH YOUR LITTLE CHEEKS

ID: how about no.

LA: AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

LA: CUUUUUTE

SA: what are you psonics, RS?

SA: look at them. they're bonding.

RS: | Presently | I suspect They are My Ability to Marvel at |

RS: | Well |

RS: | Everything in Here |

RS: | Haha | =:B |

RS: | | Ah | No | But | I can Teleport | ! |

SA: Teleporting... That's an admirable psionic.

ID: marveling at how weird la is you mean pheres.

LA: YOU SURE ARE HUNG UP ON HOW WEIRD I AM

LA: HOW OLD EVEN ARE YOU

LA: LIKE 2

ID: sure, i'm 2.

LA: COOL

RS: | Yes | Yes | That is What I Mean |

RS: | Haha |

RS: | | And | Oh | I don't know If I'd Call It Admirable | ? | It's just a Thing |

RS: | Telekinesis is So Much More Useful |

LA: IT'S ONLY AS USEFUL AS FAR AS YOU NOT GETTING HIT FROM BEHIND GOES

ID: can you teleport far?

SA: But many psions I've met don't have it. It is unique.

SA: My telekinesis is very weak, right now.

SA: I'd rather teleport.

RS: | Ahh | Define Far | ! |

ID: like. out of sight.

SA: could you jump blocks that way?

RS: | Oh | ! | Probably | Um | RS: | I can Go Up to Fifty Feet | I think | And I've Gone Farther | But |

RS: | It's not Ideal |

RS: | Haha | Too Tiring |

LA: WICKED!!!

SA: are there any risks associated with it?

LA: WHO CARES LA: I'M IMAGINING WHAT KIND OF SWEET AIR YOU'D GET WITH THAT!!

SA: and how many sweet broken bones could be received.

AA: | | No Broken Bones | ! |

LA: NOT IF YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING

RS: | And | Um | Not Really | ? | Nothing More than the Usual | ! |

ID: the usual, that's comforting.

[kawaiifunhologram-blog]

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

"Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

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Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

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Hi,i have few questions about motorcycle: 1.If i already have a C license,do i still need to take the written test at DMV again? 2.Where can i go for the training lesson?? ( at San Francisco or bay area) 3.Which transmission i should learn first? 4.What are the brands of motorcycle other than harley davidson are popular in the US? 5. What is the approximate cost of the insurance?""

Can anyone give me an estimate on how much insurance would be on this car for an 18 year old?

http://www.arnoldclark.com/detail.html?ac_reg=cc_z7zzceuy0c1uz99c&$ac_branch=&$ac_min=&$ac_variant=&$ac_trans=&$ac_type=&$ac_model=Z4&$ac_body=Convertible&$ac_doors=&$ac_max=&$ac_year=&$ac_cc=&$ac_fuel=&$ac_color=&$ac_miles=&$get_results=View%201%20Cars&$ac_make=BMW&$ac_sr=0&$ac_pp=10 I'm 18, and am considering buying this car. I'm not naive, I am aware the insurance will be very high as I'm a teenager and it's a sports car, but is there anyone here who works in the car insurance industry who can give me an estimate on how much insurance would cost me a year?""

Mens car insurace???

How much more do men under 24 pay for insurance than women under 24?? On average??

Women drivers to pay more on car insurance?

Women could face considerable hikes in their car insurance premiums after the European Court of Justice ruled that insurance companies must stop charging different rates for men and women despite the fact female drivers are statistically less likely to be involved in an accident. What do you think about the verdict? Personally i agree. I don't think insurers should be able to discriminate against anyone because of things they have no control over like gender, race, religion etc.""

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

Who do I contact when a taxi driver has no private insurance?

Who do I contact when a taxi driver has no private insurance?

Car Insurance?

What is the name of the car insurance I could get, that covers any one who drives my car but who is not on the policy? Thanks""

Whats the best insurance for the self employed?

We need some insurance, but don't have a ton of cash.""

How does health insurance work in the US?

I am a non-US citizen and need this information to do a case. Specifically: 1) Is health insurance compulsory for everyone? 2) What happens if someone cannot afford it? 3) In the event that a medical procedure needs to be done, does health insurance cover all the bills? Does the patient need to pay anything extra? 4) Does the patient have any say over what kind of procedure he can take? Say if 2 treatments are available for his condition, can the patient choose the more expensive treatment? And if so, is it covered by the insurance? Thanks for reading this. Your help in answering any part of the questions would be greatly appreciated!""

""Can you get cheaper insurance, if you are driving on behalf of a disabled family member?

i am currently 19 and just passed my test - my friends of same age - pay 500-700 a year on car insurance and they say they get cheaper because they are acting as carer driver (e.g of grandfather or disabled brother)- basically you say to insurance companies that i am caring for them and need me - my dad just had a eye operation - just got blue badge and had heart attack 3 times - and yeh he gets mobility allowance - (because he had some other problems - not surely no what) - do you think i can use him to act a carer of him - he is driving at the moment so do you think he needs to give up driving is this possble or they mis-understood

Buyer wants to buy my car but has no driver license & insurance?

Hello, I listed my car on craiglist a week ago and now just got a buyer who wants to buy it. The problem is this person has no driver license and proof of insurance. He's only 19 years old. I have the pink slip with me and also written a bill of sale. What should I do? I don't want to be liable if this buyer gets into car accident or traffic tickets. I was told to remove the license plates and notify the DMV ASAP. I'm from California by the way. Thanks""

I have an old car ... is it worth it to be paying for 100/300 insurance coverage?

I am driving an old '97 accord, which I got after someone hit & totaled my previous car last year. I have been paying 100/300 JUST liability insurance for it, but I want to know if it is worth it. I am paying approx $100/month for just all liability at this rate. I lowered my coverage and 25/50 is approx $70/month, so I want to know if it is worth it. I need advice since I know nothing about this at all. I don't mind paying if it is a better option, but I also don't want to overpay for an old car. Any advice is greatly appreciated!""

How much is motorcycle insurance?

Soon I'll be looking to get an '08 or '09 CBR 600 rr. I'm 21, own a car, never been ticketed or anything else in my car. Wondering if that affects my rates at all, or if 21 with a sportbike = brain splatter just registers on their screen.""

Which is the Best insurance in child plan?

Which is the Best insurance in child plan?

How can i make my truck engine more powerful?

i have an 05 ford ranger 3.0 6 cyl 4 wd and i want to make it more powerful. what parts or should i upgrade and what brands are reliable and cost effective. im only 16 and make about 500 bucks a month before taxes and insurance etc. so i really need the parts to be cost effective

Will it be more expensive to get health insurance in January?

When I did my income tax they said starting 2014 there gonna start charging a penalty fee for not having health insurance I'm looking for some right now but I'm not working right now and my employer dosent provide insurance so I was thinking in January when I start working Will it be more expensive because there's like a lot deadlines for insurance right now in December

What is a good health insurance?

I want to get insurance for me and my husband. I need an insurance that offer health dental and vision benefits. I have seen alot of insurances, but i want an insurance that gives me good benefits, not just discounts. Can someone please give me opinions about your insurance and what benefits they provide you?""

I'm looking for decent but affordable health insurance that includes maternity...anyone know of some?

I'm looking for decent but affordable health insurance that includes maternity...anyone know of some?

How does insurance for a scooter in florida work?

I was wanting to get a scooter a little like the one on this site: http://gainesville.craigslist.org/mcy/1167379006.html So anyone have any info that might help me like will i need insurance, would i need a special tag or license that costs more, are there any laws towards scooters in florida, would i need to get something from the owner like any type of paper work? Any tips would help a bunch!! thanks!!""

Canada car insurance -- am I getting screwed?

Our 1990 GMC truck (average condition -- nothing special!) was vandalized about two months ago. The punks damaged the doors so badly trying to get in that our insurance co. was going to write it off. Aside from the doors, the truck is perfectly fine (runs great), so Hubby spoke to the adjuster who promised us a cash settlement , and said he wouldn't write the vehicle off. We got a chq in the mail, and used some of it to put new doors on the truck (it's not pretty, but we don't really care). NOW we got a letter from AB Transport saying that the truck is salvage, and no longer legal to drive. Insurance wrote it off! The cash is gone (spent very wisely -- don't judge!), and now we are being forced to buy a new truck. Insurance told Hubby that we didn't have a choice , but I thinks that's bogus. Hubby signed papers for the cash settlement, but nothing for the write off. CAN THEY DO THAT? What are our rights?""

California speeding and no proof of insurance ticket?

It was dark and raining. I just came off the bay bridge in SF and am positive I was driving below 40 on the bridge and between 40-60 when I got off the bridge. The cop was on 80E past fremont exit. He said I was at 67 in a 50 zone and also did not give me enough time to look for my proof of insurance. He said lets make this easy and quick and cited me for speeding and the no proof of insurance as non-correctable. It this accurate? I don't think his radar reading is accurate. How can I challenge this?

Car Insurance for a 19 yr old male?

I'm going to be buying an black 03 Cadillac CTS and I was wondering about how much my insurance would be. I've been driving since I was 16 with no tickets or wrecks. Can anyone give me at least an estimate on what it might cost? I will be using it mostly to drive back and fourth to work.

""Hi , i had an accident and wrote my car off, i thought id cancel insurance but insurance company say ?""

that i cant because its a credit agreement , i thought that cant be right im now paying insurance for a car that i don't have , help""

What effect does not being at fault in an automobile collision have on your insurance premium?

Doesn't the cost go up any way?

HELP!!!! CAR INSURANCE?

If you studied car insurance quotes previously you will know that a Q.B.P. accurate quote takes this many minutes?

Cheap insurance?

i am looking to buy a chevy camaro RS and i know the insurance will be high does anyone know how much it will be? if there is a way to get less then i will buy the Z28 which would be more because of the V8 right?

Can Insurance Companies ask for co pay?

I never got into an accident before and once I did it had to be a hit and run. I bought a brand new car and want the repair to be done by the dealership (they have their own collision center) but the insurance company is saying that I need to pay 20% of the total repair cost and my deductible. I live in the state of California.

How much will my car insurance cost me?

I am 18 years old, I just got an 07' Chevy Silverado and I need insurance tomorrow, how much do you think it'll be monthly? Also how much would it be if I got on my dads or grandmas insurance? I need cheap! haha""

What would the insurance quote be for a 2011 Honda Civic 4-door Sedan?

Im doing a car project for school and we need to price cars and get insurance quotes and I am having trouble finding an insurance quote becasue mst of the websites want to mail the quote to your house which i dont have time to wait 4 cuz the project is due thrusday, or thye assume ur buying the car. So can anyone tell me what a reasonably quote wud b for this particular car or waht websites i can use that wud give me free, instant quotes. Thanks By the way for the project we only have to estimate insurance for the first year and im 18yrs old so what wud the quote be based on this as well.""

Why is KTM insurance so expensive?

I just recently purchased a 2008 KTM 250 xc-f, and as part of my loan I had to get it fully covered. I'm just curious why a 250cc dirtbike costs more to insure than my 2004 600rr was; same coverage. Is it because it's new?""

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

Where should I get life insurance for my parents?

Hello, I would like to buy life insurance for my parents without them knowing about it because we're Asians and Asians are usually superstitious about this and considered this as a jinx. However, my parents are both a lot older now. My dad is 67 and my mom is 57. They are both pretty healthy as of now. We are not very well off and so I worry. I just want them well taken care off even after death. I really want to send my parents back to their homeland and have them buried over there. It's really sadden me to think about it because I love my parents a lot. With that being said, can I please get some guidance on what I need to do? Are there any good companies out there that I can work with? What's a good life insurance plan? Is it true that after a certain age, you are no longer eligible to buy life insurance? Any other additional advice and tips are appreciated. Thank you for all the help!""

How much is Canadian (British Columbia) car insurance?

I am 21 years old and have had a licence in California since I was 18.

How much would motorcycle insurance cost?

Hello, i'm 20 about to be 21 in december, but i'm gonna be going for my motorcycle license in a week, an planning on buying a kawasaki ninja 250R since it has good reviews, but i'm wondering how much it would be for insurance i'm just going for motorcycle license cause i don't like cars, trucks etc. but yeah so i don't have a normal license so i have no driving record of crashes etc. i'm in indianapolis, IN cause i know states vary. Rob""

How much would my usaa insurance be?

I was pulled over for 3 violations (no license, insurance, and running a red light) and next year it will be 3 years. The court said they gave me 1 point on my license (I paid off my ticket because I couldn't go to traffic school). I read that insurance companies could see up to 5 years of your driving history. I plan on completing an online course to be certified. I've had my license for over a year. I'm a female in california, currently 19. I was wondering how much my insurance would be (I'll be under my parents usaa insurance) if I complete the course and wait until the 3 years are up. Serious answers only please. Thanks!""

Insurance rates: What would you guesstimate for a 23yr old Male?

And I'm still in college, if that matters. Little credit history. Any response is helpful.""

Insurance to expensive.?

I live in Miami and i just got my license. I was excited to finally drive. But i found out that monthly the insurance would be 330 extra added to my parents policy. I rather not drive! What are my options?

What is the renewal process for car insurance?

Do they call in around expiration of the policy. Or is it a form you fill out. What questions do they ask? In particular, say you failed your G test before the expiry of the insurance policy and you redo everything and get a G or G2, will your insurance rate remain the same?""

Where can I find a comparative listing for auto insurance rates?

Where can I find a comparative listing for auto insurance rates?

Renting a car and insurance in US ?

is insurance for renting a car optional or essential ! ?

Hayabusa Mini Insurance. (Kit car?)?

I am a young driver and I was hoping to buy a Mini with a Hayabusa engine from someone like Z-Cars. I have heard that some people have got cheap insurance for them. I have heard of a 17 year old who had just passed his test got insured for a hayabusa mini for 1500 which is cheap for a 17 year old. I was just wondering if there is anyone has insured a Hayabusa or similar Mini for road use. If so how much was it and from which insurance company? Thanks

Why is it so hard to get health insurance with an autoimmune disease?

I have rheumatoid arthritis and can't seem to find affordable health insurance. Providers see huge red flags when I tell them this. Right now I get all my healthcare with the county of Los Angeles, which is huge relief, but at some point I may want to leave the Los Angeles area. I have no idea what kinds of health care programs other states have for the lower income people. I am surprised that health insurance companies can get away with avoiding people with certain diseases, unless they want to pay huge premiums. Can someone explain this to me?""

Would claiming on insurance/suing cause this guy to lose his job?

Basically, Iive in NY and a while ago I was driving to work when a taxi in the next lane floored the gas, then came into my lane too early, and smacked into the side of my car. (http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/hs047.snc6/167708_1829137573885_1403718556_32066375_2647816_n.jpg the car was spun a few times before hitting the curb and i got severe whip lash, taking a few weeks off work which isn't good in my profession. I fully planned to make an insurance claim but my lawyer also suggested suing for dangerous driving. It has struck me however that this guy might lose his cab if I do so, and he is likely to have much money, while I could pay for the damages, or a new car. I don't want to make this guy lose his job, how would it play out?""

Need to find a good place and affordable price for dental care..?

Hello I'm from Oklahoma and I'm looking for a good Dentist.That is affordable.I have BCBS Insurance.But it only pays a small amount.I will be 33 next week and I'm so depressed over my teeth.I got real sick a few yrs back and the meds and all just made my teeth rot..Please someone help..Thanks Melody

Can I get cheaper Car Insurance in England if I have 3 different clean Drivers Licences?

South African Licence, Japanese Licence and English Licence, all CLEAN! Can I get cheaper car insureance then?""

How much would insurance be on a 2005 Subaru Wrx Sti?

Before you answer please read this: I am 16, this will be my first car, my father will be buying it for me but i would call the insurance company but they are closed at this time of night so i will just ask on here. Please do not lecture about how i don't need this car and all i understand the concern but since you aren't the ones paying the bills please don't lecture. Thank you for any and all help available.""

Can I legally drive my fiances mothers car; will her insurance cover me?

I'm 20, I will be 21 in a month. I got my Provisional Drivers License today. I have a toddler, and am pregnant. We live in Calvert County, Maryland. My fiance and I live with his parents, we rent 2 rooms. His mother is 69, and has All State car insurance, not sure what plan. Can I legally drive her car infrequently, like to the grocery store, or to OB appointments here and there without having insurance myself? Does it depend on her plan? She's going to call them tomorrow to see, but I'd just like to see what answers I get on here tonight. Any help would be appreciated, thank you. Will it cost money or make her insurance more expensive to have me added as a driver to her policy?""

Would insurance be higher on suv/truck or car/sedan?

For example Mitsubishi Montero Sport vs Volkswagen passat, Nissan maxima, or Mitsubishi galant.""

Do you know if there is an insurance company that insures cars that travels in both Mexico and Texas?

I am temporarily living in Mexico and will be crossing the border to Texas. I don't know if anyone knows if there is auto insurance that takes care of insurance for crossing the ...show more

Why is the co-pay for dental insurance more expensive than health insurance?

I compared the co pays on several reputable dental insurance companies and it is very expensive. Many things are not covered, even with the best dental insurance. Health insurance is usually a 10 dollar co pay for primary physicians and a 35-50 dollar co pay for specialty physicians. Is there any reason why dental insurance co pay is as expensive as it is?""

How does insurance for a scooter in florida work?

I was wanting to get a scooter a little like the one on this site: http://gainesville.craigslist.org/mcy/1167379006.html So anyone have any info that might help me like will i need insurance, would i need a special tag or license that costs more, are there any laws towards scooters in florida, would i need to get something from the owner like any type of paper work? Any tips would help a bunch!! thanks!!""

What is the best and cheap health insurance?

What is the best and cheap health insurance

What is the average insurance cost for Mopeds/Scooters?

Im 18 and im looking to buy a moped or scooter and im just wondering what I should expect to pay on insurance. 50cc/125cc - 3rd Party. If I was to pay monthly, would 20/month be a reasonable estimate?""

""Monthly Insurance for a 16 year old, if he were to get a G37 Coupe? IS250? IS250c? TL 2010?""

How much would it cost? an estimate? I heard grades, colors of the car, and other things like that affect the insurance cost? Well if it does, he gets 4.0 and he wants a Black. We live in CA. And our insurance company is Farmers, but I would just want a monthly insurance cost. thank you!""

Insurance rates-will they increase with 1 speeding ticket-58 years old?

will my insurance increase with one speeding ticket? i have aaa auto insurance

Can I claim my car insurance back? It was cancelled after my car was written off & I couldn't afford another.?

My car insurance company cancelled my insurance because I did not buy another car. I could not get another as I'm still waiting for my excess to be paid out. I had paid 4 months of my annual car insurance so had to pay the remaining balance when they cancelled it. The accident was not my fault. I understand that I have to pay a full year's car insurance but wondered if I could claim for the months which I have not been able to benefit from due to the accident rendering me car-less!

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77262

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/affordable-health-insurance-working-families-sean-wagner/"

[eeejay-blog1]

You ever feel like you’re the worst patient ever?

I’m this weird combination of “reads actual medical journals and comes at his docs with way more mumbo-jumbo than they expect from a slummy-looking 22-yr-old” and “will ignore his docs’ advice, skip his meds, bitch and moan about every side effect, and then complain about how nothing works”

Example: so a week from today, I have a followup with the urologist, physiatrist, and neurosurgeon. Now, the physi is probably gonna poke me with needles, test my reflexes, and ask me why I prefer to drag my dead foot around rather than wear an AFO. Not much to challenge there. The neuro is probably gonna look at some MRIs (which still confuses me, it seems like everyone else with TCS gets an MRI like six months after the detether but whatever), poke my back and make sure I’m not oozing cerebrospinal fluid, and so on. Again, not much to question there. I’ll probably just bitch at him about my meds for an hour.

But the urologist...fuck, man, I hate those guys. I especially hate the GP and Uro I first saw a couple years back, who hit me with all that first-line bullshit like “have you tried not drinking alcohol? cutting tomatoes out of your diet? not drinking so much water?” Like yes you clods, my auntie has interstitial cystitis so I know all the diet and lifestyle tricks, tried them, they didn’t work, that’s why I’m in your office. And I drink almost exactly 3 litres of water every day, any less than that and my piss is dark yellow all day, which I know for a fact is not healthy. I even brought two weeks’ worth of a voiding diary, without being asked, because I know that’s some shit they always ask you to do so they can rule out simply drinking too much water.

Then without bothering to do urodynamics or take an MRI, he put me on Detrol, which was four months of absolute hell for my brain and body. His mentality was like “oh it’s just overactive bladder, no big deal, just take these pills and you’ll be fine.” All it accomplished was taking me from pissing myself 4x a day to 2x a day, which really doesn’t change much as far as my lifestyle’s concerned. So once I got fed up, he agreed to do urodynamics, and literally THE WHOLE TIME I WAS NAGGING HIS EAR OFF like “you’re trying to find out how I normally piss? Well, my definition of a normal piss certainly ain’t one with two hoses in my dick and a balloon up my ass, so I’m not quite sure what you’re gonna find out” 

Same exact scenario when I got a different uro back at school. He was mentioning a lot of retention during urodynamics, which has never been an issue before, and no other test has found pre- or post-op, and I straight up told him “look, I can’t empty out all the way if I’m using a urinal in a crowded restroom. What makes you think I can empty all the way with you staring straight at it?”

And fun fact: I’ve only ever had a UTI twice in my life. Once after that first urodynamic study, and again after the second uro’s nurse tried teaching me to self-cath. Yet they claimed that I needed to self-cath, or else I’d be at risk of catching a UTI? That’s ass-backwards, and when I called up that uro to send my records to my current uro, I was literally growling through the phone to tell him how wrong he was.

My current uro seems nicer and more knowledgable, but I can already predict the conversation we’re gonna have:

“You shouldn’t be using pads so much, they’re bad for your skin” Okay dude I shower every day, use mad moisturizer and lotion, and there’s literally nothing else that works while I’m sleeping

“Your leakage doesn’t seem entirely volume-dependent, so you need meds to stop the detrusor spasms” Dawg we’ve already been down the med route, unless you wanna try me on one of those new ones that doesn’t have the same side effects of Detrol, I’mma throw them out as soon as you prescribe em.

“A catheter would be far easier to deal with” Uhh no. I psychologically cannot bring myself to self-cath, no matter the size or the lube it hurts every time. And if you’re putting a Foley in me, you better give me some strong ass sleeping pills too cause my body can’t just forget when that shit’s inside me.

“Well here’s a bunch of surgical options” and that’s when I’ll limp outta that office and probably never see another urologist again. Like come on homie, respect me respecting my body.

Even if I’m not the most difficult patient this guy’s ever seen, I’mma certainly be his biggest headache of the day. Plus I’ve passive-aggressively been keeping a voiding diary since the day I got discharged, and he’s sure as hell gonna raise his bushy ass eyebrows when he reads my weird formatting like “5:42 AM, woke up mid void (120ml) leaked more on the way to bathroom (70ml) gave up and flopped onto the couch to deal with that shit in the morning (50ml)”

[saltybelievertragedy-03a1b893]

A guy accused of harassing a female developer gets rejected from a Google-led organization

 Sean Gallup/Getty Images

If Susan Fowler’s episode with Uber is the quintessential example of how female engineers can be mistreated at their Valley jobs, the story of a very important Google-led project asking a guy to leave is the total opposite.

Last week, the group made the controversial decision to eject a man from the group for violation of its Code of Conduct policies, reports TC Currie at The New Stack.

But the interesting thing is, his alleged violations didn’t take place inside the group, but outside of it, before he even joined. The group who booted him was the Kubernetes Community.

This guy was accused of harassing well-known female developer Jessie Frazelle when she worked at a $1 billion-valued startup called Docker.

Docker helped create a new market for a new technology called “containers,” a way for developers to more easily write apps that will live in the cloud.

YouTube/Container CampFrazelle loved her work, she often said publicly, and traveled around giving talks on how to use the new container tech that she was helping to build. S

he was known as “THE face of Docker engineering to the community.”

But there was a dark side of her job. Just because she was a woman in tech, Frazelle had been subject to brutal harassment including sex, rape, and death threats.

Her employer had known about this for a while because she had grown so fed up with it that way back in July 2015, she wrote about these experiences in a post that went viral.

About a year ago, the situation culminated for her. A tweet from another female engineer claimed that Frazelle was “harassed out” of Docker. People close to her tell us that there was one particular man who was harassing her so badly that … Read More Here...