#Makes it a little conversation we're having together and a little fic experience created in tandem

[erisenyo]

Questions for fic writers 1, 3, 5

Anon thank you so much for indicating the ask game, I did not realize I reblogged them both so close together lol

What inspired you to start writing fanfiction?

Epistles by Lady_of_the_Flowers lol. It is an absolutely stellar fic and I couldn't get it out of my head when I finished it. I kept imagining how the story might have gone on, what their BSS reunion could have looked like, how they might have found their happy ending...

And eventually I couldn't get it out of my head to the point that I wrote the BSS reunion (the teashop alley scene for any Burning Bright readers). And then I went hm, this could be better with a bit of context... (880K words later.)

3. Are there any specific themes you enjoy exploring in your fics?

I LOVE playing around with perception! How can two people experience the same event but interpret it differently because of their different frames of references. How can a character's behavior suddenly be recast in an entirely different light because of revelations about their background. How does an external POV contextualize or challenge or reframe an event. How does the reader's own perception come into play, whether through canon events or tropes or genre conventions, where expectation builds perception which then is challenged and recast by the unfolding events, not just within the text but within the reader as well.

5. What techniques do you use to create believable dialogue?

I really like writing dialogue, and I tend to think of building up an exchange in a few layers:

Verbal Habits: is your character a rambler (Sokka)? Blunt and terse (Zuko)? Always trying to poke fun (Toph)? Those verbal habits help build out the conversational voice of each character, and are often rooted in their characterization

Recognize Rhythm: Actual conversations tend to be a mixture of long and short sentences, exchanging listening and speaking, nonverbal as well as verbal cues. A hear-to-heart will have a different flow to it than shooting the shit after work.

Dialogue Isn't Perfect: People stutter and stumble, thoughts start and stop, there's cross-talk and interruptions, spoken word tends to be less formal than written word--building in those pauses and half-thoughts can help it feel more natural, and also show where a character is stumbling or struggling with a thought

Build Around the Words: layering in even simple action is a great way to make a piece of dialogue more engaging while also accomplishing some needed point A-to-point B or worldbuilding or exposition. Characters are also reacting to and thinking about what they're hearing, what they might say next, how it makes them feel.

Don't Forget Nonverbal Cues: Someone saying something with averted eyes and fidgeting hands suggests something very different than the exact same thing said with a direct gaze and squared shoulders. Body language makes the dialogue more rich.

Mix Up Your Sentence Structure: This is related to rhythm, but switch between using dialogue tags or not, put your internal aside at the front of a line of dialogue or the middle or the end, switch between long and short sentences. And do it all with a purpose--fewer dialogue tags and shorter lines of dialogue generally feel like a faster conversation, dialogue breaking in the middle tends to shift the emphasis of the sentence. Get a feel for the ways you can leverage your sentence structure itself to signal tone or pace or pauses!

For this Questions for Fic Writers asks game!

[makeitastrength]

5 questions that you haven’t been asked yet, but you want to answer 😉

16. What’s an AU you would love to read (or have read and loved)?

I'm currently reading @girlintotv's The Bachelor AU and I love it so much. I don't even like The Bachelor, but I'm so captivated by this fic!

26. Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or one that was only dialogue?

No dialogue. I feel like there's only so much you can capture with dialogue alone, and I personally enjoy building out the scene and writing internal thoughts and emotions

36. Do you visualize what you read/write?

Absolutely. If I can't see it or hear it in my head, I can't write it. Now I'm curious... do people write scenes without being able to see them in their head?

42. Have you ever received a comment that particularly stood out to you for whatever reason?

I appreciate every single comment. But to echo what others have said in their answers, it's the ones that quote back their favorite lines to me that tend to stand out the most, because I really enjoy seeing what resonates with people... especially when it's not necessarily the things I thought it would be

50. Answer any question of your choice, or talk about anything you want to talk about!

I just really want to say thank you to everyone! My previous fandom experience ended badly, and I was really hesitant to join a new fandom and start writing fic again. But you guys have been so welcoming, and I love the community we've created here on tumblr! It's all the little things - the @chenfordsecretsanta, the @chenfordfanficquotes page, the conversations, the comments on AO3, all these asks we send to each other - that make this fandom such a wonderful place to be, and I'm so so thankful we're all here together ❤️

Thank you!!

[withacapitalp]

this got so long i'm sorry lol. that post about jonathan hurting steve just reminds me of my number one issue w steve and jonathan/nancy becoming closer which is that the onus is almost always placed on steve to make amends and take that first step w/little to no emphasis on that effort being reciprocated. like, steve apologizes to jonathan for everything in s1 (as he should) and saves his life twice. whether or not you think jonathan should apologize for how intense the fight got is up for debate (i would just like acknowledgement of how seriously he did/almost did hurt steve) but steve def deserves an apology for 1)the photos (which he never got - obv he broke the camera but then he also bought jonathan a new one all w no actual apology to steve on jonathan's part, it wasn't only nancy's privacy he invaded) 2) the fact that he slept w nancy knowing she and steve were still together (which he literally verbally acknowledges when nancy says she waited for him or w/e). that second one obv also goes for nancy bc she also doesn't apologize to steve for leading him on for a year while having feelings for someone else then cheating on him. this isn't me saying jancy are terrible ppl and entirely unsympathetic (nancy is obv v traumatized and struggling w barb's death tho this does not excuse the way she treated steve) but they both did some fucked up shit to steve that ppl rarely make them acknowledge or even feel bad for, which creates a v unbalanced dynamic imo.

Oh boy this did get long!!

So this might just be curating different fandom experiences, but I don't personally see a ton of Steve being the one who has to make amends in fandom or Jonathan and Nancy not having introspection on their pasts. In canon I totally see that though, and it's a lot. Like I think they're all just really human, which I love. They fuck up, and they mistrust, and they have to learn and grow into being close. It isn't automatic.

I think like.......here's my thought process. Apologies are nice. Apologies are good. The right thing to do is always to apologize if you feel like you've wronged someone.

But I also think Steve wouldn't accept it.

Okay I'm putting the rest under a read more because I'm going on a little meta rant on Steve Jonathan Nancy and why apologies are a complicated thing for them and ultimately not what any of them really need.

First Steve because he's my blorbo. Steve is a really interesting character. He has this veneer of extreme self confidence that hides a really soft core of a person that ultimately experiences a significant amount of rejection. He has this brittle exterior that's bitchy and snarky and gives as good as it gets, but things touch him in a deeper way that I think is easy for a lot of people to ignore. I could totally see Jonathan awkwardly trying to bring things up to maybe try and apologize only for Steve to be like nah man we're fine! It didn't work out no biggie, I'm aok, you guys work together and we didn't.

Steve is constantly searching for validation and love (Implied because his parents are neglectful or at the very least have an extremely bad marriage that would be enough to add layers to anything) I think that the bullshit conversation really impacted Steve in a significant way, but if he shared that, then he's leaving himself vulnerable to getting hurt again, so he would do everything in his power to truly make everyone think he's okay, even potentially making himself think he's okay too, when deep down he isn't.

I alsoooo don't really think that Nancy or Jonathan necessarily feel bad. If Steve is pushing so hard to say he isn't hurt, then eventually I could see them not thinking too hard on it. Jonathan because in canon they aren't really friends obviously (Which is a goddamn travesty by the way I wrote an entire series of fics because I hated that they weren't friends) and Nancy because Nancy is an extremely self focused person.

Not selfish. I think it's important to make the distinction between selfish and self-focused. I don't think she's intentionally doing things to hurt the people around her for her own gain, but she thinks about how things effect her and how things impact her first and foremost. Not even just with Steve, but with everyone. A good example of this is in season three when she cost Jonathan his job too with her sleuthing. Her boyfriend who is in a very bad financial situation at home and could have really used a job that actually pertained to his interests and might have lead to future relationships in his industry. She didn't feel bad about that, she was too focused on the injustice to her. Even something as simple as never knocking when he's in the dark room and ruining his pictures over and over.

She just doesn't think about other people, which makes sense! She's a teenager, she's a privileged person, and she's smart as all hell. She gets extremely focused on doing the 'right' thing (according to her rules and her mind because she knows she's smart and thinks she's the smartest in the room always) and she misses doing the best thing a lot of the time.

For Steve, someone who is clearly extremely not self focused-which is also not a great way to be because extremes never are- and Jonathan- Someone who has been forced to put his family first his entire life- that is always going to be a point of conflict in her relationships with them.

But I don't know if we've ever seen Nancy give a genuine apology in the show, and I honestly doubt we ever would. It's not in her character really. But! Regardless of all of that, apology isn't really the end goal. Saying your sorry shouldn't be the end of something. I would much rather see Nancy Steve and Jonathan grow into people with more empathy and ability to own up to their shit/call people out on their stuff in the future rather than rehashing their past again. Unfortunately I have a feeling season five is gonna be a lot of rehashing lmaoooo

[jakesimfromstatefarm]

not jealous | jake sim

summary: jake sim is not a jealous person. at least that's what he tells himself. so why does he find himself going through your phone when a certain "bluejay park" decides to text you?

pairing: jake sim x y/n [ft. mentions of jay park]

genre: angst, fluff 

warnings: angst, cursing (very minimal), one slightly suggestive sentence, jake being cute, some more angst lol, slightly cheesy bc jake’s just too cute ugh

wc: 3.8k

a/n: ok i loved writing this, which is why i went on to almost 4k words LOL oops. but anyways, i love jake a little too much and this type of scenario has been running around in my head for a while now so i decided to put it into words. also i may have created this blog just so i could post this somewhere LMAO anyways yeah this was my first fic so hope you guys enjoyyyy <3

Jake Sim is not a jealous person.

At least that's what he tells himself. To be fair, in his past relationships, he never showed any jealously. Then again, he doesn't know if he can call those relationships, "relationships". Does a fifth grade relationship with a girl who he was once dared to kiss during a game of Truth or Dare in the basement of a classmate's house during their 11th birthday party count? He doesn't remember being jealous when the same girl was later dared to kiss his classmate, Sunghoon. (Funny enough, that's how the two boys came to be best friends 'til this day, but that's a story for another time.) 

But really, Jake doesn't think jealously is one of his traits, even if he's now almost 20 years old without any experience with love other than his current relationship with you and that short-lived romance in the fifth grade. (What was her name again? Jake would have to ask Sunghoon later.)

So he doesn't know what clicked in that brain of his that lead him to this current situation he was in. He doesn't know why he felt a little spark of anger in him when your phone, which you left right next to him on the couch while you went to take a shower, kept buzzing with texts from "bluejay park". He doesn't know why he couldn't kept his eyes distracted from the messages, although your phone was constantly lighting up because whatever it was Jay had to say to you, he would not shut up about it. He doesn't know why he questioned what your relationship with Jay was for a split second.

In fact, you're close with all of Jake's friends. That's one of his favorite things about you, you get along so well with all his friends you might as well replace Jake himself in the friend group. So he doesn't know what tells him to take a little glance at your phone—at the messages.

But he finds himself doing it anyways.

Hearing that the water in the shower was still running (you were always the type to take long showers), he quickly grabs your phone and scrolls through the lock screen just to find that he couldn't even read the messages since you had your notifications set so no one could read them unless the phone was unlocked (darn you and your settings!) Thankfully, Jake knew your passcode––and you knew his too––or he thought he did. Until the iPhone vibrated, telling him the passcode was wrong.

He must've entered it too fast or something. So he tries again.

And again.

And again.

Until the iPhone switches its screen to say: "iPhone is disabled. Try again in 5 minutes."

There's no way. You never change your password. And even if you did, you would tell him—you two even had each other's fingerprints saved into each other's phones in the past (you know, before the world decided that Apple's home button was too lame and decided to just completely get rid of it). If there was an option to save multiple faces for Face ID, you two would be that couple that saved each others faces in your own phones.

That being said, Jake sat there, your phone in hand, frozen. Why was your phone locked? Why was Jay texting you 10 texts per second? Why did he feel guilty about this entire situation?

He hears the shower switch off and in that moment, he swears he feels his heart beat just a little faster. He tells himself there's no way you'll be out before the 5 minutes are up. You followed a really meticulous skincare routine (one that Jake memorized by now) that took an extra 15 minutes of your time after each shower.

"Hey Jake?" Your voice calls out from the tiny bathroom door crack that you left open before you hopped in the shower, "Is my phone out there? Do you mind bringing it to me?"

Fuck.

Jake shifts on the couch. Taps his foot on the ground. Returns your phone to its original spot. Clears his throat.

"Don't you want to get dressed first?" he calls back, quite timidly.

He can hear you stop moving around in the bathroom. Probably telling yourself what an odd response that was. To be fair, it was an odd question, considering the fact that you two have been together for so long, it’s not like he hasn’t seen you undressed before...intentionally or not. 

Next thing he knows, the steam is rolling out of the bathroom door and you're stepping out in your towel, eyebrows raised.

"If you didn't want to get up from the couch, you could've just said so, you lazy butt," you smirk at him as you walk towards him and the couch, leaving a faint trail of water drops behind you. Jake's eyes follow your figure as you go to grab your phone and lift the screen towards yourself.

That's when he freezes. You do too.

You cock your head, as if asking yourself why it was disabled. He can hear the gears in your head turning.

"Jake, did you try to unlock my phone?"

He runs through all the possible excuses he could blurt out. Come on Jake, think of something! But he knows he can't lie to you.

Too many beats of silence pass by.

"Maybe," he finally says—or more like murmurs. He looks up to you like a child looking up at their mom, who just them caught stealing a cookie from the cookie jar. To his surprise, you don't show any hint of anger. A flash of confusion—and is that worry he sees?—crosses your face for a split second before you shrug and turn towards your room to change, dropping the subject. It was natural for you two to use each other's phones anyways. So then why did you have that look of worry?

Jake knows you well, a little too well. But that's what you love about him. He can easily read all your emotions. One of the many things he picked up from dating you for almost two years now. But why would you care if he tried to get into your phone? Why would that worry you? All the possibilities run through head and his own worry begins to increase. He trusts you. He does.

So then why does the thought bother him throughout the entire day? Why does he bring it up during dinner later that night, when you're both cuddled on your sofa, slurping take-out ramen while rewatching your favorite k-drama under the thick blanket that you always keep in your living room for nights like these?

"Huh? Of course I've heard from Jay today, we had that conversation about that stupid meme you boys kept laughing about in the groupchat we're all in, didn't we?" You answer him when he asks if you've heard from Jay lately. You sit up from your warm spot under Jake's arm to put your empty bowl on the coffee table in front of you. When you lean back, you look up at him,

"Why do you ask?"

"Oh, it's nothing, just wondering," he says, avoiding your eyes by keeping his own trained on the series currently playing on your TV. This would be your third time rewatching this series together. He would never complain to you though, he knows how much you love it and if he were being honest, he was secretly attached to the characters—not that he would ever tell you, he would never hear the end of it from you and the boys.

"You're being weird. Just tell me, or did you forget that I can practically read your mind," you say with a giggle and shove to his side, the one you were currently warmly cuddled into. Jake wasn't the only one who learned how to read emotions; you could read him just as well as he could read you. And like you, that's one of the many things he loved about you. But maybe not in this case.

He toyed around with the contents inside his ramen bowl with his chopsticks.

"I just..." God, how does he word this? Why was he having trouble explaining it? You were the easiest person to talk to. To him, you were the only person he could tell everything to.

"Jaywastextingyouabunchearlier," he blurts out quickly, but not quickly enough for you to miss it.

He feels you shift under his arm. He feels the air in the room shift. Tension.

"What?" Now you're sitting upright, legs criss-crossed in front of you on the couch but turned, so your body is completely facing him. He mirrors you, sitting up to put his ramen bowl next to yours on the surface, but he stays facing the TV.

"Your phone kept going off because of him when you were showering," he says with a little more confidence. But inside, he was nervous as hell, the same nervous as when he asked you out for the first time many moons ago. But it's too late to back out now, he brought it up first, anyways. Guess we're having this conversation now, good going Jake!

"Is that why you tried unlocking my phone earlier? I mean I thought you were just trying to leave selfies on my phone like you always do but you were trying to read my texts?" You question, slightly raising your soft voice. He doesn't know how to react, he hates confrontation.

"It wasn't like that, Jay just kept spamming you and like I—why was he even texting you in the first place? Then your phone got disabled because you changed your password, which you never do by the way, so I–"

"I changed it because my little sister kept getting into my phone when I went to visit my family yesterday! Did you really think I was hiding something from you? You know I can text whoever I want, right? You don't own me."

Okay so now he's managed to make you angry. Good going Jake, part 2!

"Okay but what does Jay need from you so bad that he has to send you like 50 messages at once?" He's standing now. So are you, eyebrows furrowed together as you collect your bowls from the table.

Standing there, bowls in hand, you say, "Jake, that's none of your business! It wasn't even that big of a deal, I don't know why you felt the need to nosy around."

"Well, if he's texting you non-stop, then obviously it's a big deal! We wouldn't even be having this conversation if you would just tell me what you guys were talking about," he murmurs back, eyes narrowing. You scoff as you trail into your kitchen. He follows behind and stops at the other side at your kitchen island as you place the dirty dishes into the sink.

"No, we're having this conversation because you obviously don't trust me! It doesn't matter what we were talking about, it doesn't matter who I was texting! I could be texting your mother and I shouldn't have to tell you what we were talking about! That's why we're having this conversation," you say as you turn back to face him from the other end.

He hates this. He hates fighting with you (which is a very, very rare occasion). He hates that you think he doesn't trust you. He hates his insecurity eating at him, telling him to keep questioning you on why you and Jay were talking in the first place. He was aware that you were close with his friends, but it wasn't until the texts he realized just how close you are with them. It's not that he didn't trust you, he just didn't know how to act when it came to you and other guys. God knows how he got lucky enough to meet you, let alone date you, so the thought of him losing you to someone else actually terrified him. Not only were you his first real relationship, but he wanted you to be his first and only one in life. You were it for him.

"Why did he text you." He deadpans from his side of the kitchen.

You scoff with a hint of exasperation. "You're kidding me."

You stare at him. He stares back, quirking an eyebrow, as if restating the same question back, as if testing you.

You're fuming now. Why was he making it so hard? Why was he doubting you? Out of frustration, you start laughing, which scares him. That can't be good.

"Fine. You wanna know so bad? Take a look,"  you're one tone level away from screaming as you take your phone out of your pocket, unlock it, and open up your conversation with "bluejay park", sliding the phone across the island to reach him.

Jake stares at the phone which now lies there, unlocked, facing him. Isn't this what he wanted? It is, right? That's why he started this dreaded argument with you in the first place.

Then why does he feel so fucking awful?

He looks back up at you, to see you sighing and looking up at the ceiling, as if trying to force your forming tears back into your eyes.

Yup, he feels horrible.

"Happy? Happy to know we were just trying to plan a surprise birthday party for you but you and your jealously just had to know huh, Jake?" You quickly state, voice cracking, as you tried not to choke up. You weren't sad that he found out about the surprise. You were sad that it felt like he didn't trust you. That he thought you were the type of person to do god knows what behind his back. You hated the feeling of not being trusted. Especially by Jake, of all people.

"Fuck."

Jake's face (and heart) falls with the most broken expression you've ever seen. But you're too sad, angry, tired (a mix of all?) to care. Your only goal right now is to not let him see you cry.

You hurry past him, across your apartment, and into your bedroom, slamming the door behind you, leaving behind a shocked, and regretful, Jake.

His heart shrinks when he hears the door slam shut and a little more when he looks down at the still unlocked phone in front of him. He didn't have the heart in him to look at it anymore. Of course he trusted you, he knew what you said was the truth.

He mentally screams at himself for assuming the worst––for thinking that you, a literal angel, would betray him.  First, he thought he was losing you to someone else. Now, he was afraid he just lost you through his own actions. 

He hesitantly sulks over to your door, softly knocking when he reaches it.

"Y/N?"

No response.

"Y/N, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, I let my—”

"Jake just please leave me alone for now," he hears you painfully say from a distance, meaning you're on your bed. He knows the door's unlocked—the lock on your door hasn't been working for a long time now, despite the many times he tells you to talk to your landlord about it. But he doesn't find it in him to open it. He knows he messed up. If he saw you in there right now, crying, he wouldn't know what to do. He wouldn't know what he would to do himself, knowing he was the reason behind your tears.

He nods in silence, knowing you can't see him, but does so anyways and returns to his spot on the couch. He could leave right now, go back to the dorm with the rest of the guys, let you have your space like you wanted. But his heart hurts at the idea of leaving you sad, angry, or a combination of both. He can't leave this unresolved. He fucked up, he has to fix it.

And so he sits on your couch for another hour. The clock on the wall behind him continues to tick as the silent tension in your apartment continues to grow. When it hits 11pm and he's sure you've slumbered off into sleep, he quietly enters your room.

He can see your figure in the dark, your back facing the door as you're curled up into yourself under the comforter. He feels his heart drop a little more when he imagines you crying in that position from earlier. He slowly peels the comforter open and gets into his side of the bed, careful not to bother your sleeping figure.

Laying there, staring up at the ceiling, he's never felt more like a stranger in your bed. It's not that he hasn't slept over before, god knows he's probably slept over at your place more than he has in his own bed. But right now, in this moment, he just felt awful. Like he didn't deserve to be in such close proximity to you. How could he be deserving? He violated your privacy, made you feel like you weren't trusted, doubted your relationship.

These thoughts run through Jake's head as he stares up at your ceiling fan, wishing he could turn back time to a few hours ago, before he checked your phone, before he let his insecurities get to the best of him.

You can feel the dip he makes in the bed behind you when he gets in. Of course you're not asleep. There's no way sleep could reach you when you had the recent events constantly replaying in your head like a broken record.

You knew Jake with all your heart. You didn't have to look at him to know he was probably laying there, hurt, staring up at the ceiling, drafting what to say once you wake up—or once he knows you're actually still awake.

You decide to break the tension by turning to lay on your other side, facing him.

You were wrong. Thanks to the little sliver of moonlight shining through your sheer curtains, you can see him, now laying on his side, already looking at you with so much regret in his eyes. You can almost hear the cracks in your heart physically forming.

His eyes widen when he realizes you're still awake. He opens his mouth to say something, but not before you quickly shift over to his side of the bed and embrace him in a tight hold, burying your face into his chest. Without any hesitation, he returns the gesture, arms holding your body as close to him as possible. As if once he let go, he'd lose you forever.

He lets out a sigh of relief as he breathes you in. He didn't even know he was holding his breath all this time.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry Y/N," he mutters into your hair. He feels his hoodie getting wet from where you buried your face. He pulls you closer, if that's even possible, feeling his own eyes heating up with sadness. He would never forgive himself for making you feel this way.

"You know I trust you right? Please know that. I shouldn't have assumed the worst when I saw your phone. I...I let my insecurities get to the best of me."

You move your head from its home on his chest to look up at him, as if asking him to elaborate. This was new to you, you didn't know he held insecurities in your relationship. But it wasn't because of you, no, you were his entire world. Losing you meant losing everything.

Jake's never been the best at saying his feelings. That's why it took him so long (with the help of his six best friends) to finally confess how he felt about you. He was afraid of letting people in if they could easily walk out. Maybe that's why he never let anyone into his life before you. But oh, were you an exception. The second he met you, he knew he was fucked. But thank god he did, because thanks to you, he's been able to be more open, more vulnerable. He's able to talk to you about anything and everything. He doesn't have that same fear of losing people anymore, not when he has you in his life to reassure him every step of the way. But right now, in this moment, he doesn't know how to tell you that his new fear was, in fact, just losing you.

The sheer idea of you not being a part of his life anymore terrified him. 

"I hope you know you're never going to lose me Jake, if that's what you're insecure about," you softly mutter as you wrap your free arm that's not stuck in between both your bodies around him to gently play with the ends of his hair. It's as if you could read his mind, he loves that you know him so well.

"It just sucks that you could even think I would ever do something as awful as what you were assuming...with one of your closest friends nonetheless," you continue.

"I know. I know, and I feel terrible. I'm so sorry. I know you would never do anything remotely close to that, and I know you would never intentionally try to keep anything from me," he sighs. He shifts so he can lie down on his back, bringing you with him to lie on his chest, never letting you go once. "It's just...I just don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you Y/N. Everyday, I ask myself what heroic thing I must've done in my past life to deserve this life with you and I can't help but think you could just as easily be stripped away from me."

As much as your heart breaks listening to him rant, you feel your love for him grow even more. You knew how hard it was for him to put his true emotions into words, and him telling you this reminded you how much trust he had in you.

After some moments of silence, moments of him drawing random shapes onto your back, moments of you two just holding each other like it was the end of the world, you speak up.

"I love you. I'm sorry for making you doubt yourself—"

"No, it's not your fault, I can't help but think things like that. I just don't know what I did to deserve you, and I know that I need to be mo–"

"Babe let me finish," you say with a little giggle in your tone. He immediately stops and mutters a little "sorry". How cute, you tell yourself.

"I was gonna say," you look back up at him so you're making direct eye contact now. "You're the only one that's ever on my mind, Jake. I can't help the way you think, but I can assure you that there is no one else I would rather be with. And I mean that for the rest of life."

You snuggle back into the comfortable hoodie he's currently wearing (you make a mental note to yourself to steal it from him later) and decide to ease the tension,

"So you're stuck with me for life, sorry to inform you Mr. Sim."

Jake lets out a laugh, looking down at you to see you returning his smile with a cheeky one.

"I love you. So much," he says so sincerely, so genuinely, that you almost tear up again from how content you were. Now you were asking yourself, what did you do to deserve him?

Jake Sim is not a jealous person.

No, he just loves you.

A lot.

[jacobbellaendgame]

Some great Jacob x Bella fics to read, a mashup of all kinds -

Experiments by Aretee - Jake and Bella's easy and comfortable friendship has tripped its way into the physical when curiosity about how the body reacts to desire leads to a series of experiments-and Jake and Bells are the actual subjects. It will appear PWP for a while, but there is an actual story line in the works. Stephenie Meyer created the playground and we're just swingin' on the swings.

Frozen Dawn by EAnna23je - His arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me ever tighter against his all consuming heat. Our lips crashed together, his surprisingly yielding and rough all at once. And it was then I knew Jacob Black no longer remained my best friend. But was I prepared to face the golden dawn once the icy moon waned?

Lost To Me by Lynn7808 - Edward leaves, Bella eventually falls in love with Jake and has his twins. The day she is to come home from the hospital she disappears leaving only a note. What happens when she returns sixteen years later? Not the typical Bella leaves Jake story.

Never Too Late by spiritmccinnamon - After an 'epiphany' the day of her wedding to Edward, Bella is able to explore a romantic relationship with Jacob, at last, only to be given a warning that changes her future. She leaves, and returns years later to find things are not as expected...

Foursome by bellaBBblack - Where do you draw the line between friendship and love? Some choices are never easy to make...

Freewill and Chains by Fuiku - Jacob is 16, and he has no brothers, no enemies, and no way out of his responsibilities as the newly phased Alpha, waiting for his pack. The only thing keeping him sane is the little girl who comes everyday to see her wolf in the woods. B/J AH/AU

Furnace by jessicakaycobb - Bella jumps off the cliff and is *not* seen. How Jacob and Bella's relationship might have progressed.

Songs From Different Times by lilabut - Thirty years in the future, the world has stopped turning for Jacob. Caught between his imprint and the hope that deep inside that girl with the golden eyes, his Bells is waiting for him, he has to make a choice much graver than any other. ANGST, post-BD

The Passing Years by rainypromise - After Eclipse,Jacob came back, got his life together and did pretty good,then he found out that for the last two years, Bella had been living in Port Angeles, that she was still human and unmarried. So now, of course, all bets are off.

Say the Right Word by nerdhawaii - Bella confessed her motives to Jake after he pulled her from the water in New Moon; what happens when she returns to Forks at the ripe old age of 25? Who have they become in the meantime? Ignores Italy, E & BD, rated T for mature themes. Bella is OC.

First In Line by lilabut - Fifteen minutes. And they would be husband and wife... Jacob and Bella get married.

Promise Kept by LJ Summers - Written as a one-shot for the Haitian Earthquake Relief project, this is about true love lasting for an entire lifetime and beyond. How far would a soul go to keep a promise?

our love is waning by theidiotgirl - Jacob, Bella, and this is all she can give.

He Stopped Loving Her Today: The Crimson Rose by itslikenature - He said "I'll love you till I die." She told him "you'll forget in time." But as the years went slowly by, she still preyed upon his mind. Sometimes love can never be forgotten.

Doors Closing Slowly by lilabut - A different take on Bella and Jacob s conversation at the end of Eclipse and how everything developed from that point on. Told in flashbacks with Quil and Embry acting in the present.

Left for Dead by caffeineaddict13 - “Man, Bells, you stink.” Three different scenes between VampireBella and Jacob.

Wonderful Life by theidiotgirl - Quil tells Claire the story of Jacob and Bella.

Until Her Heart Stops by Saiyachick - Jacob wants to be there for Bella's last moments as a human. Oneshot

[coffeedrgn87]

Fic Authors Self Rec

Thank you very much for tagging, @phoebe-delia. Since I have 150 works to choose from and do not possess the ability to be impartial about the fruits of my hard labour, I will take @basicallyahedgehog's advice and use a random number generator.

The numbers I rolled are 1, 3, 9, 53, and 107. And because I rely on Georgie to help me make decisions (what, adulting is hard), we're going with number 1 being my most recent fic.

1 - in the jungle, in the mighty jungle [Dronarry, M, 2.2K] Summary: In which Ron's got himself into a pickle, and it's up to Draco and Harry to fix it. 🌟💜 Well, what can I say? This was my first time writing Dronarry, and I am still reeling from the experience. It's my response to the prompt 'jungle', which the lovely @veelawings left in my asks, and I'm so grateful for getting the chance to write something for this gorgeous triad, especially after @wolfpants' Tiny Home changed me for all eternity. By the way, if you'd like to prompt me, here's a list.

3 - Draco’s Bat Burrito [Drarry, T, 410 words] Summary: The fastest way to bring out Draco's soft side is to put him in charge of a bat baby. 🌟💜 A fabulous conversation with my darling @emmalovesdilemmas [check out this amazing site blog that gives me all the fuzzies] led to the existence of this little drabble. Both it and the giftee have a special place in my heart. If you don't know what a bat burrito is, check out this video, your life will be richer for it.

9 - tell me you love me without telling me you love me [Harry/Charlie, T, 610 words] Summary: In which Charlie finds a way to express his affection for Harry, and Harry is perfectly fine with that. 🌟💜 Sometimes, the mood to write strikes me, but I have zero ideas. Thankfully, my dearest Ali (@nv-md) always has something up her sleeve, so all I have to do is ask for prompts [Overexposed and As You Wish, Minister ruined me, by the way, I will never be the same ever again, and I don't want to be]. The prompt for this particular fic was 'forehead kisses', and since I have a very soft spot for Harry/Charlie, the choice was easily made.

53 - Practicing for the ballet, Potter? [Drarry, T, 234 words] Summary: They never tire of this, know just how to pass the time. 🌟💜 I don't know what on earth made me write this. A likely story is having Draco's iconic line stuck in my head, and simply didn't know what to do with it. I was also trying to experiment with a slightly different style of writing, at least I think I was.

107 - The Day The Weasel Crashed The Party (And Got More Than He Bargained For) [Drarry, M, 3.3K] Summary: It's a perfect evening; the restaurant is exquisite, the champagne is cool and bubbly, and Harry is in the company of the only man he wants to spend tonight with…until his best friend, Ronald Weasley, makes a surprise appearance. Things can only go pear-shaped from here on, or can they? 🌟💜 Oh wow, this tale is like three years old, which makes me somewhat hesitant to take a closer look at the writing. I should really have more faith in my writing. Anyways, I haven't thought about this particular fic for a good while, but I do remember it was fun to write. I got the inspiration from this little clip created by @paquim, who is incredibly talented. Weirdly enough, after writing my first Dronarry, I feel like this fic is the perfect requisite to eventually get them together.

Once again, thanks so much for the tag, Pheebs. I'm extending this to @wolfpants @nv-md @cavendishbutterfly @makeitp1nk @nelweensfic @aqua-myosotis @thebooktopus @corvuscrowned @ghaniblue and whoever else would like to take a trip down memory lane and share some of their works.

[pocketfulofrecs]

It's Friday and we're here with another Author Spotlight!

It’s impossible for you to be in this corner of fandom and never have heard of Vir_Abelasan. She has written some of the most interesting Wangxian fics we have read, a shade darker than usual, but so engrossing. When we want to read something a little savory, we go back to this author.

She has written 49k words in 5 fics, and we can’t wait to see what else she will come up with.

Her fics:

It’s we that you are for - [explicit | 2.5k | LWJ/WWX/LXC pwp]

to be wielded by your hands (our post) - [mature | 3k | competence kink]

Visitations - [mature | 18k | wip | modern au - corporate espionage]

Like stones on an unseen board - [not rated | 11k | dark lan wangji]

Symmetry (our post) - [mature | 13k | dark sizhui]

Dee’s favourite: I love Symmetry but my favorite happens to be Like stones on an unseen board. I have a special fondness for dark LWJ who is just as devoted to WWX as canon LWJ is. This fic has the potential age difference and teacher-student relationship but they don’t really get together in it. I like that, I like how LWJ recognizes how Jiangs are dimming WWX’s light and does things to get WWX away from them, even if it involves manipulation and subtly widening the divide between the Jiangs and WWX. Dark in a way that eventually benefits WWX.

Ju’s favourite: Ohhh I loved Symmetry. I loved to see JC getting his just deserves by Sizhui. The fic is very dark, and in many moments I was completely blown away and so angry. I love when reading makes me feel things, and I felt a lot of things reading this one. But as dark as it gets in some points, it makes sense in the story. And then we get a happy ending that is so good and perfect. Made me cry.

The Interview:

Q. When did you start writing fics? Did you have fandoms before this one?

A. Somewhere around the early 2000s with the Buffy the Vampire Slayer fandom, and BtVS was very prolific with crossover, which just led to more fandoms, mostly Western TV series. I wrote a lot of the Dragon Age trilogy afterwards, and a lot of Pacific Rim before finding MDZS.

Q. What made you start writing for MDZS?

A. Honestly at first I was here for the porn, because the Wangxian porn is bountiful and tender and exquisite. But then I read the novel and was enamored with how much more nuanced everything was, especially the many recurring themes and motifs related to social classes and personal vs familial/communal responsibilities, which as an Asian person you don't often get to dig into in the oftentimes Western-leaning fandom spheres.

Q. What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

A. In the MDZS fandom it's Symmetry, because it's literally the fic I wanted to read upon completing MDZS but was not able to find. One of the saddest thing in canon for me is the lack of consequences for any of the gentry cultivators' actions in the past, and while it's realistic to the world building, I just really want an alternative where someone could go around an inherently broken system and make it so perpetrators actually pay for their crimes and less people in general becomes collateral.

Q. What’s your favourite type of fics to read?

A. Smut, because I'm just really bad at writing it. And oh, how the MDZS fandom delivers - Pure smut, sad smut, painstakingly tender smut, existential smut, it has everything! But Wangxian smut in particular is almost always a treat because there's just always that undercurrent of trust and having a person who's just for you in every sense of the word despite everything else happening. It's such a good, affirming feeling.

Q. What’s your favourite comment? Or type of comment?

A. Any comment is always a delight! From just incoherent screaming to details of which lines spoke to them the most, every comment is a reaction and stories are out there to create conversation in the first place.

Q. What motivates you to write?

A. Writing has always felt like problem solving to me, and fanfics in general has always been really interesting to write because there's the inherent conflict and problems written into canon, but also the matter of the fandom's perception of the source material to play with and solve.

Q. Who’s your favorite author?

A. There's so many fanfic authors throughout the years who are just amazing and hit a lot of very profound places a lot of published works didn't go to, so it's really hard to choose just a few. But thank you, every single fan author out there, you've really made a lot of people's days (and lives) better with your writing.

Q. What is your favorite trope to read and/or write?

A. I'm particularly fond of the trope of characters who are normally amicable or accommodating just going apeshit, both literally or figuratively. Because both in fandom and in real life, kindness and compromise in someone are often mistaken as a free pass for others around them to be terrible.

Q. Do you have any advice for new authors?

A. Write what you feel strongly about, I guess? And it's sometimes helpful to have an objective to the whole thing, for the times when it seems the story is going nowhere or you get stuck in a particular aspect of it. Sort of like a thesis statement, so whenever you fumble you have something to refocus on.

Q. What do you think is the most important element in writing? Plot, characterization, relationship?

A. Characterization carries you a long way since they're the vehicle to bringing the readers to where you intend them to be, but I also feel like structure helps a lot with stories too. Just the way you scaffold a narrative, like laying down the kind of path you want your readers to follow and experience along the way to the end.

~

Check out their stories on ao3 and remember…

Comments and kudos feed the author’s soul.

[lusilly]

If we're going full Ender's Game what about Val or Peter for the ask meme?

ok! it is morningtime i’m going to answer this

i feel half called out by this question cuz val and peter are both names of characters from my rp (i play val and peter is AU Vampire Version of damian’s dad). incidentally, valentine collins (my character) has absolutely nothing to do with valentine wiggin.

now here i go for both:

why i like them: i’m no longer drunk enough to be as soul-bearingly honest as i was about the kids last night, but long story short, peter wiggin was insecure and jealous and angry, and he was told that he was a Bad Kid so he had to be Careful or he’d be Bad For Life. he put so much WORK and EFFORT into being Good and making people think he was Good when to him he thought this whole entire thing was a facade, he thought he was Bad Bad Bad on the inside. i love peter cuz he taught me it’s ok to do the right thing for the wrong reasons; it’s ok to have all that anger inside of you for so long, stewing. he thought his loneliness was absolutely his own self because that’s the way he’s Made. he was self-loathing but also like. ok. i gotta get the fuck up and do this. and of course when JP and theresa eventually broke the news to him about the REAL reason he didn’t get into battle school, it was like the floor dropped out from under his feet. and he had to scramble to remake his sense of self, cuz for so long he’d centered his ego around the careful knowledge that if he pushes too far he’d be too BAD too AGGRESSIVE too EVIL - but that wasn’t it at all. he finds out he’s not fundamentally bad, and keeps going, tho that damage is already done.

as for val, i love val cuz she’s some great sneaky characterization. most of EG the front she puts up is that peter manipulated her and cornered her into doing this and frightened her, but the reality is that val, as i say in this fic, “liked playing the game, but didn’t like getting played by [peter].” she enjoyed the Power of playing his lil game, demosthenes and locke, but always made it sound like it was about her fear of peter and love of ender. val was more complex than that. i also like how she grows in the enderseries and her sort of fun relationship with ender much much later on - and how offended she is when soul!val shows up lmao, cuz that’s a fair reason to be offended tbh, cuz ender had somehow created this Perfect Canonized version of her in his heart. she wasn’t as perfect as ender imagined, and she knew that, and i think she was injured by that reminder.

why i don’t: the parts i don’t like about peter are that he’s a skinny lame ass white boy from the US but tbh i’ve always thought that’s why he rends me to the bone more than, say, damian, who is hypercompetent and a Trained Killer/Superhero. peter’s physical weakness and general shitty lameness is like #me ha ha. i guess i have some beef with how he unites the world cuz again it’s the White Guy ruling over the entire world then somehow reaching world peace in such a way that ends the need for a hegemon ever again but [shrug emoji]

as for val, i guess i always wished she would be more of a Player in the game and not so passive. i blame orson scott card’s raging misogyny for that, though.

favorite scene: i have two fav peter scenes; one is in shadow of the hegemon, when he’s in the library with an apology letter from the admiral of the IF and his hands are shaking and he wants to SCREAM cuz he’s just some dumbass college kid and he has enough clout and power to get a groveling APOLOGY letter from the highest ranking officer in the IF and he can’t stand keeping it to himself but he also of course can’t tell anyone. i also love the scene in, shadow puppets i think? when he’s been forced to evacuate the brazilian compound cuz achilles infiltrated it and he’s in the hotel room and briefly considers #suicide but in a very matter-of-fact way, and comes to the conclusion that would just be way too embarrassing. then he goes out and dutifully makes the announcement for the media. a sort of watershed moment for young lucy tbh. i think it’s also the moment when JP and theresa come in and tell him they’re proud of him, and “nobody mentioned ender’s name at all,” which hits peter like a ton of bricks.

honorable mention: when he insists on going in with bean and the Soldiers for the final confrontation with achilles in the compound. like peter you are a skinny kid with no field experience don’t do this!!!!!! but he feels so Responsible so he does anyway.

fav val scene is probably…………..well she gets fewer breakout scenes overall but i do love all her banter with peter cuz she’s pretending to hate him but really she Enjoys the game they’re playing. i was glancing thru children of the mind/xenocide and she admittedly has some funny moments with jakt, AND i love her bonding with miro (tho that gets weird when soul!val shows up). i’m not a huge fan of her scenes with ender cuz she always treats him with kid gloves. i think i really do like the Sharpness she had with peter. i think of that one particular conversation right after the bunnies thing? where val seems to be very performatively like “ugh peter’s scary” but in practice she’s really Into the power working with him is giving her

favorite book: my fav peter book is…… god this is hard lmao. i love him in shadow of the hegemon i LOVE him in shadow puppets and i love him in shadow of the giant. he has some of the best scenes in shadow puppets but his characterization in shadow of the giant is so fun and has Moved so much, but shadow of the hegemon is also super duper fun cuz it’s just when he’s gaining steam. idk lmao.

my fav val book is arguably EG itself because that has her moments with peter

favorite line: i have so many with peter but probably after he sees bean and petra (or maybe JP and theresa) share a kiss: “i’ll have that one day. someone who’ll kiss me goodbye. or maybe just someone who’ll tie a blindfold over my eyes before the execution.” he’s such a #romantic. oh also? the “i love you” after reading bean’s letter cuz it’s a gut punch every fucking time

fav val line? that’s hard. i love the “funny as a one-legged rabbit, val” / “of which there are no doubt several in the woods” / “hopping around in neat little circles” exchange, which has val’s iconic “peter, you’re twelve” in it lmao. so some of that fun banter probably

i looked up the locke and demosthenes chapter and am dying cuz i forgot how much i loved them both

otp: peter/petra/bean for sure, and for val, well, val should be a lesbian, even tho her husband’s ok. val/virlomi would’ve been dope as hell. ps peter’s first kiss was on the boat with virlomi pass it on

brotp: YALL peter and val are their OWN brotp, despite the way val demonized peter as soon as she was away from them. they loved playin the game together

headcanon: oh man uhhhhh. they’re both bi as hell. val started regular correspondence with peter when he was Older and she was still young cuz of space flight but it was too weird and peter was too kind and forgiving and unlike the sharp and dangerous peter she remembered, so she got weirded out and quit it. val loved peter more than ender but hated herself for it and could never bring herself to admit it, and spent her whole life trying to convince herself it’s not true