#Magic Bullet Wi

[bereasontopersistence]

Everybody's opinions on socks.

🪽 A.. piece of clothing that we can wear? I personally think it.. helps with the cold a little.

⏰ ...

[ He only gives you a smile. A rather.. unsettling one. ]

📕 Well, I guess I like wearing it when I get cold..?

⛓️‍💥 [ It only mutters under it's breath. ]

⛓️ Something we wear on our feet, I suppose..?

💢 Ridiculous...

⚫️ Why are you asking that? ...

💫 Even if I would want to answer that question of yours... even I cannot provide a serious response.

🐦‍⬛ Pardon?

🥩 Am I supposed to give a well-thought-out answer about a fuckin' sock?

🎀 I think they're nice.

⭐️ You come all the way to MY forest just to ask about a sock?

🔫 Scram.

🚫 ..s ..ocks? .. .

🌊 You chose to waste my time on an idiotic question.. who do you think I am, some clown. .?

⚡️ ...

🔴 And I thought I would be hearing at least a decent question...

🧹 Another thing to clean, yeah?

🧺 I don't know why you want my input on that.

[randomthingsthatilike1]

honestly I think the wrong parent was sent to pick up Aly in the ending of Trickster's Choice

the entire book we see through Kyprioths visions to Aly that Alanna, above all, cares for Aly, that she really does see Aly for who she is and worries terribly for her lost, hidden daughter, angry and upset and scared. She's constantly scrying for her with the mirror Thom gave her--her daughter is missing and her husband lied to her about it.

After months and months of worrying and praying, Alanna finally knows where her daughter is. She loves George, she does, but he lied to her about her only daughter's well being. And after the 8 years of her training constantly lying to everyone Alanna is sick of it, sick of doing it and avoids it at almost all cost--but for this? For the love she has for her daughter?

She’s been worried sick, scrying every free hour, distracted and blaming herself for her daughter’s disappearance. She's not needed in Frasrland, not really, not with this stalemate at the border. The killing devices are all gone and nothing is happening there. They don't need her--but Aly does.

She’s been married to George for 20 years and she’s known him for 30--she’s picked up a few tricks on how to go around unseen, how to slip away seamlessly but first there are a few things she has to do.

Her husband with his nondescript features can roam freely.  She cannot. She’s far too distinctive nowadays, but to quote her daughter that is what razors and dyes are for. Her long hair is her pride and joy. After years of cutting it boyishly short, as well as being a good enough fighter she can have long hair--it’s her one vanity.

She loves her hair. She’d topple kingdoms for her daughter.

A short and stocky man with copper red hair isn't the ideal spy, but shes here to find her daughter--its the story she goes with. She’s looking for her daughter, a Tortallan, who was kidnapped and sold into slavery in the Copper Isles.She speaks enough Carthaki to get by and well it’s not like she can’t defend herself, even with just a knife and hand to hand.

The only dead giveaway about her are her purple eyes, but she's a mage, with a powerful Gift specializing in manipulating the human body--if there's a magical way to create an illusion or temporarily change your eye color she would know it. If not, I'm sure George has found a way and she's already used it before.

This barely scratches the surface of what she’d do for Aly. She's a mage, with a powerful Gift specializing in manipulating the human body--if there's a magical way to create an illusion or temporarily change your eye color she would know it. If not, I'm sure George has found a way. She glamors her eyes to look the same as her daughter and her husband. She lightly dyes her hair, making it a more blondish red like Aly's.

She finds a young squire stationed at the border and surreptitiously steals some of his clothes and other supplies around camp, her personal weaponry far too flashy and distinctive.

Aly isn’t the only one who was trained by the King of Thieves.

You can’t tell me she’s never done anything like this with George, not wanting to be stared at by people who recognize the famous Lioness, either getting him out of some scrapes or just relaxing and having fun.

Kyprioth is sweating bullets. There's only so much he can hide, although he has far more power in the Copper Isles than Tortall so he can't stop her but he’ll do his best to hide her from the Goddess but uhhhhhhhh there’s only So Much he can do. 

Alanna is Determined--she will find her daughter and is she maybe less subtle than George was? Sure. But all the same, she’s brought to the Balitang’s home in Rajmuat and makes her way to Lombyn.

It’s the same scene, of Alanna approaching Winnamine , introducing herself as Alan Cooper and asking to buy Aly-- Winnamine realizing “Alan” isn’t really here to buy Aly.

It takes Aly just a little longer to recognize Alanna--and she comes to a halt and is filled with shock because this is the Lioness, her mother who is persona non grata to the Copper Isles due to killing one of their princesses decades ago (and wow that might actually get Ochabu to tolerate her mother) and would probably be either killed or ransomed as a hostage p much on sight, the King’s Champion, one of the most distinctive and famous women in the continent--is here.

She’s here, her hair short and lighter and her purple eyes--they’re very similar to Aly’s now. Alanna letting out a sob at the sight of her daughter--her hair also shorter, eyebrow scar, broken nose, but alive and safe and still with that spark in her eye.

Just. The PARALLELS of both having the explicit approval of their god to deceive and lie and how they both deceived so many people to achieve their goals. Aly seeing her mother engage in spycraft and trickery to try to find her is probably a better apology than Alanna could ever find the words for

Later after Alanna had her Own standoff with Kyprioth she tells Aly she didn’t want this life for her, not because she was a noble or a Trebond but because she’s Alanna’s daughter and she knows how hard it is to keep a secret and deceive the people she cared about, and how much it hurt when it all came out. That’s something George never had to deal with--George has never really had to deceive his loved ones. They’ve always known he’s Crooked and an inkling of what he’s been up to--but Alanna has. She did it for 8 long years and she was good at it too, but the amount of pain it brought her after meant she never wanted that for her daughter.

Alanna earned her shield through treachery, the constant fear of being found out dogging her footsteps and once she got it she made sure no other girl would have to.

For Aly just to be reminded how similar she really is to her mother and begrudgingly putting that together--for Kyprioth to tell Aly that yes George gave her the skills he needed that made Aly his ideal Spymaster and what she’s done so far in keeping the Balitangs safe is why he wants her to stay, but it was Alanna’s actions that really sold him on recruiting Aly in the first place.

(I have other feelings about Kyprioth and Alanna here because d a m n “they say he loves a good trick”--as a girl for 8 years Alanna fooled the Tortallan monarchy and nobility. That’s what his Promised Queen will have to do. And he is George’s patron--it would make sense that both of them loved aspects of Alanna.)

(also while she’s there it’d be hilarious for Sarai to spar against Alanna and have her ass handed to her--it’d be a great nod back to when Aly was observing Sarai and thinking about her own training bc it sure would make Ulasim wonder wait can Aly use a sword????)

(also if anyone wants to write this go for it)

[loudblonde]

Perfectly Content, Simon "Ghost" Riley/Male Reader

Summary:

Simon comes home to find his husband missing, distraught he gets his team to help find him, only to end up getting shot by a poison-laced bullet.

Or Simon's husband is more badass and connected than even Price realises.

word count: 3,4K

warnings: the aftermath of torture, getting shot, almost dying, violence

author note: The ending was a wee bit rushed as my arm was starting to hurt too much,

Ghost knew from the moment he saw (Y/N), that no matter what, that man meant more to him than he could ever comprehend and that scared him more than he could explain.

(Y/N) wasn’t even military, he was a civilian that Ghost had met out and about, an accidental bump into each other… It was like something out of a romance book. (Y/N) had grabbed Simon and forced his heart to beat to his rhythm. Ghost was trapped in the emotions and it scared him.

He knew he had more enemies than he could count and for one of them to get a hold of someone innocent… he was terrified, more terrified than he had ever been living under Mister Riley’s roof.

So, he hid him away from everyone, (Y/N) had no family, no friends, he had been completely new to town and the idea of falling in love quickly hadn’t been something (Y/N) had seemed against. Ghost had bought a plot of land in a forest where an old house stood on it, he had gotten water, electricity and Wi-Fi out there, so his perfect little civilian husband never lacked anything. Sure, he would buy in bulk at the grocery store nearby, but (Y/N) never seemed to dislike it or complain. Everything was perfect. Too perfect.

Simon wrapped his arms around (Y/N)’s waist, he kissed the back of his neck, letting the morning rough beard he had yet to shave scratch over his neck. (Y/N) chuckled and leaned back against him. “Si, I am cooking waffles, a little patience, please.” There was no bite to the sentence.

“I know… my love. I know.” Simon said. “But you just looked so delicious from behind.” That comment earned him a light jab in the ribs. He glanced at the fruit cut up for the day, perfect cubes as always, Simon didn’t know who else had such complete mastery of knives. (Y/N) always said his mother had been very strict about knife safety though there was more to it than that… Simon simply didn’t care more than just observing it. He didn’t massively care, he just found it… strange?

“If you keep sweet talking me, then we won’t get to eat the waffles before they are stale.” (Y/N) said with a slight smirk.

Simon hummed. “That would be a disgrace to your cooking, I can’t do that against you.” He spoke.

(Y/N) smiled and leaned his head to the side, he kissed Simon gently. “Why don’t you make the table, then I will handle the waffles?”

Simon kissed him again before detaching. He went through the simple demand- request and happily made the table. He looked at their white tablecloth, it held no stains. Simon wasn’t sure how but he knew it to be magic. There was no other plausible way to explain it other than that.

Soon, scrambled eggs, toast, sausages, beans and waffles were brought to the table, alongside a cup of black tea and black coffee. Simon took a sip of the coffee and smiled. “I miss your coffee whenever I am away.”

(Y/N) sat down and looked at the man he loved more than anything else. He smiled widely. “Well, then you just have a reason to get home to me as soon as possible.” He said and chuckled.

“That I do,” Simon said.

Marriage life, away from missions and the blood, death and tears of his job, was paradise comparable. He loved every moment and hated the goodbyes, for he knew that one day may very well be the last.

-------

Simon returned home, still halfway stuck as Ghost, his mind was reeling from the latest mission. He needed (Y/N). More so than normally. He hated and dreaded when missions got bad, but (Y/N) always had a way to bring him back from even the hardest and most repressed places. Simon knew he could trust (Y/N), he knew him to be safe.

"(Nickname), I am home,” Simon said as he entered, not finding it unusual that the door was unlocked this time of the day. He got no reply which worried him. Simon entered their living room from the foyer and was met with the sight of blood, broken furniture and bullet casings, his blood went cold as all possible enemies who could have targeted the ones he loved went through his head.

Panic set in as everything started stirring around him. He pulled out his phone and dialled one of the few numbers he had bothered to save. Price. It rang once before he heard Price pick up, before he could even say hello, Ghost spoke, “He is gone. There was a struggle.”

The line went silent for a few seconds. “Look for a body, I will contact Laswell. Make sure to not touch anything, if there is a note it will be visible.” Price said before sighing. “How are you holding up?”

“Just get Laswell.” Ghost said and hung up. He searched his house for hours, going over everything but there was no ransom note or even a claim to who had done it, which was mysterious. Though he had found more guns and knives strapped around the house than he had even brought in. Something was going on.

Price entered the house with Laswell and a few others from a research team. “You live very far out.” Price said as the team began. “If you hadn’t told me I would never have been able to find this place.”

“It’s home.” Ghost said, his mask still placed on. “I wouldn’t give it up for anything or anyone.” He sighed at that. “Yet… someone came looking for me and found someone innocent.”

“We will find him, Simon.” Price said. “Don’t even worry about it.” Price added as he touched his shoulder, he could see as Simon became Ghost, the tenseness of his shoulders ease eerily, his breathing slowed down and true to Ghost fashion, only his eyes revealed the true broken man inside.

“Of course, we will.” Soap said as he entered. He looked to Ghost with a sigh. “I didnae ken what this man means to you, but he must be special. That is all any of us needs.” Soap said and placed his fist against Ghost's shoulder. Ghost ignored the obvious signs of Soap having been home and comfortable enough with his family to let not only the accent slip but also talk more casual Scots around them. He tried to stop himself from a spiral of guilt but ultimately failed as his vision started honing in around him, black spots danced around his eyes- Simon felt Price's hand on his other shoulder.

“Good to have you back with us, son.” Price said as Ghost made eye contact. Both men shared a nod as they all let the forensics work the house. They found some blood that had to be tested and ran through their database, but other than that, there was nothing to indicate who came to go through the house.

As the team headed back to base, Simon had to wonder, would (Y/N) even be alright? Was his husband being tortured or was he dead already? Those thoughts hunted him.

-----

(Y/N) had been having a perfectly normal day off definitely only waiting for his husband to return from whatever war crime he and his team was up to this time around. He liked the peace of having a husband away, Simon was a good cover that he had come to love. It was not even a surprise the moment people came through the door, especially not when (Y/N) had many enemies of his own. He had so many in fact, he had died and taken on a new identity, perhaps he should have changed his first name… nah, he liked it so much.

He sighed heavily as yet another person entered the room with whatever torture gear, they thought would make him talk. (Y/N) knew better than to talk, he had been taught since childhood not to talk. He was exceptional in surviving torture, he had the scars to prove it, scars his husband never saw as all sex was done with the lights off, he knew his husband had issues with his own scars so he simply never pushed.

“You are going to give us what we want.” The not at all creative nor fun torturer said.

“For the last time, I do not know where this Ghost person is, I don't even know them!” He pleaded with false fear. He needed to get out, Simon was bound to be home anytime now and he just should not see the bruises and cuts all over his body… Simon would ask too many questions and… (Y/N) realised he would need to wait.

“Oh please, I know who you are, Iron Spider.” The torturer said making (Y/N) still completely. The tension in the room grew as (Y/N) stilled cold dead eyes on the man's back. “So, tell me, where is this little… pet project of yours.”

“If you knew who I was, then why even try to take me, I won't talk and you know that, don’t you?” He said, each voice careful and with a still tone.

“I have gotten Red Room Widows to talk, I can get you to talk as well.” The man said, bringing over what looked like a fucked-up knife. “Well, shall we?”

—

The team landed on the ground outside of a barn in southern Jutland, the air whipped around them as the helicopter took off again. Everyone was deadly still as they approached the barn, each second felt like hours as blood rushed through their ears, deafening them. Everything was alive around them. The mission was anything but simple.

One quick entry of the barn and already 4 enemy soldiers were dead. They had gotten reliable intel from one of Laswell’s more shady friends. (Y/N) was going to be there and not in good condition. Ghost used the anger of knowing (Y/N), his husband, was getting tortured.

They went down the hatch, killing everyone in the way, this seemed too easy but Ghost did not care, they had taken something of his and he was going to get it back.

Chatter filled his ears but it wasn’t important enough to be filtered through, they cleared room after room, getting everything dealt with before entering the final room. A man stood behind a torn up and bloodied (Y/N), two of his fingers were missing, and his shins looked broken and fucked up beyond repair, Ghost, at a single glance, could count well over 20 visible stab wounds, the worst part is, (Y/N)s right arms skin had been peeled back showing muscle tissue and veins freely. Ghost knew who this man was, his codename was infamous despite how silly it was, Chip, no last name or first name, allegedly some criminal family empire nepo-baby, a rumour had it he was ex-military. He didn’t doubt that at all.

“Ah, the infamous Ghost, thank you so much for making my job easier for me.” This Chip said and shot at Ghost with no warning. Ghost felt the bullet lodged into his shoulder, it felt like it had gone straight through but something felt wrong, he couldn’t hear how much (Y/N) screamed despite seeing his mouth move and himself trash around in the chair, Simon knelt down as pain soared through him, the bullet had been laced with something and he didn’t know what.

Someone pushed him onto his back and applied pressure on the wound. He barely remembered anything as his thoughts went dark.

 —

Swimming

Cold wet

Swimming

Simon was swimming in water where he knew not the direction of up or down. All was pitch black, too dark for his own thoughts to even shine a light through it.

Simon knew time had passed but not how much

He was swimming again

In and out

Up and down

Careful and around

Voiceless

Thoughtless

Cold

Cold as ice

—

Watching Simon recover not only from a well-placed bullet wound but also from the poison of this Chip person was hard, (Y/N) knew he should have just risked blowing his cover and gotten out. His husband, who didn’t deserve anything like this, was dying. His contact was working on a cure, but Chip, being the son of the infamous Pitfall Viper, his poison would be bulletproof… (Y/N) had to stop his dark humour, it was only making him feel worse than he actually should.

“It has been a week,” Price's now familiar voice came from the door. “How are you holding up?”

Like Shit. (Y/N) thought but didn’t say it out loud. “I could be better but I have hope.”

“… Listen… I spoke with Kate and they interrogated this guy… Iron Spider is a myth and legend, why is he claiming that you are him…” Price said.

“If you ask, you already know the answer, John… I am not in the business anymore; I haven’t been in 20 years.” (Y/N) answered the question.

“Does Simon know?” Logically the next question.

“No.”

A sigh came from Price, reminding him just how shitty he felt. “Don’t you think he deserves to know?” Price is a man with a heart despite everything.

“… Tell me something Captain,” (Y/N) turned to him. “Wouldn’t you be hiding your ugly past from someone you love to protect them? I erased my whole existence, spent a decade making certain that I was named a myth and not a real breathing man.”

Price leaned back. “So, you love him?”

“With whatever is left of my soul and my whole heart… I was born into a world of murder and killing. Whatever we did and learned was always just to kill more as more people, there wasn’t an end… so, when I did see an end to it, I took it and I got out, no one before me or after me will ever get that privilege.”

Price frowned. “You say it is still happening today.”

“Are you even surprised? You have been working with anti-terrorism for as long as I have heard about you, why would people not be using children to start and end wars? It is no different than all child soldiers you have been shot at or shot yourself.” (Y/N) was calm, far too calm for Price's liking.

“That is different.”

“It really isn’t. You all get on this high and mighty horse. Yes, you have by all means saved the world from World War Three, but you are all just as bad as every single war criminal out there. This whole imperialist ideology you have been brainwashed with…. It is worse than any brainwashing done by the red room because you actually believe in it.” (Y/N) grabbed the wheels of his wheelchair and left the room, leaving the captain to think and stew. (Y/N) knew he wasn’t going to run away or even escape from Simon, he loved Simon and Simon was dying for him… guilt he didn’t know he could feel wrapped its nauseating coils around his stomach, trying to force bile up through his throat. He didn’t allow it, he suppressed it deep down where all his other weaknesses resided. Weakness Mother was supposed to have trained him. He grimaced as he poured himself some hot coffee, it burnt his tongue… life as a civilian truly had made him weaker, Chip had been right at that, but (Y/N) prided himself on not being weak enough to reveal anything about Simon. He brought back a cup for both him and Price. He gave the man the cup and sat down.

“He wanted information on Simon, where he was and I think it is safe to assume we know why now… from what I know, you should be well aware of his mother, The Pitfall Viper.” (Y/N) said, humming lightly under his breath. “She was…. She is, she didn’t die, her accounts are still active and while it isn’t uncommon for others to run it, her whole family are very, the best word would be independent, from the rest of the more refined criminal empire of the world.”

Price looked down at his cup. “So, will his poison kill him?” Price asked, a slight shake to his voice betraying the cool and collected ‘Captain John Price’ persona he had.

“No… I have someone working on the antidote. It will be rough but he already has been given something to slow it down.” He informed the other before taking a sip of his now moderately hot coffee. “And if he doesn’t make it till then, I will work with you to bring down anyone or anything responsible for his death.”

“And if he survives?”

(Y/N) paused at that, the words swelled in his mouth to choke him. He had avoided it for years, been lying straight to Simon’s face… he wasn’t sure Simon would trust him after this. “He knows the whole truth… and if he still wants me, I will repair everything and do anything to make it alright.”

“And when he doesn’t?” Price asked.

(Y/N) looked at Simon. “Then I leave and no one will ever see me again.”

“Little hard to do on a wheelchair.” Price said.

(Y/N) chuckled and looked at Price. “You think that I don’t already have a plan in place? I survived the Red Room and survived escaping it. Sure, my sisters are more deadly than I am, but you can’t be a slob and escape.”

“How old were you when you escaped?” Price asked.

(Y/N) smiled a bit as he leaned back. “15. Which makes me 36 this year and Simon is only a few years older than I am. Price, I… love Simon, he is my weakness and the only one I would trust with my whole life. I have been taking care of him and him. We are good for each other and you can’t deny that.”

“I am not denying it, I have seen more of Simon than of Ghost for the last 3 years. Thank you for that, it is the only reason why I haven’t had you arrested yet.” Price said.

(Y/N) shook his head. “No, you haven’t had me arrested because you fully know that you can’t, you have nothing on me, no one does. Iron Spider doesn’t exist and no one can testify that he does. He is a myth created to scare rookies. Don’t fuck up or get corrupt or the Iron Spider will get you.”

“The Soldier Bogeyman then.” Price said. “And you are content with that?”

“I am more than content with it. I love it. It means I can be with Simon and bring him back from the brink.”

Price stood up as a nurse entered the room. “I hope you are right about this.” Price left.

The nurse waited until Price left before looking at (Y/N). “You know, I never thought he would shut up.” The ‘nurse’ said.

(Y/N) chuckled a bit. “It is good to see you too, V.”

“You are lucky my idiotic son writes everything down, but I can’t promise this will cure him, he may stay in his coma for weeks or forever,” V said.

“That is fine, just give him a chance.” He said before watching her inject it into the IV drip. They said their quick goodbyes and (Y/N) stayed truly loyal to Simon and stayed while he slept.

 —

It took 5 weeks before Simon woke up. (Y/N) was present and coached Simon through waking up. He had lost a lot of muscle mass, and he was much thinner than usual, but compared to a regular human, Simon still held some shape.

The conversation they had a week later once they were both in the sanctity of home was full of tears and apologies, Simon understood and knew but it still hurt. But they eventually figured it out. Simon’s rehabilitation and (Y/N)’s eventual rehabilitation were done together. (Y/N) taught Simon how to handle a civilian life away from the military and the action. It was hard but, in the end, they carved out a beautiful life with a retired service dog called Riley. 

______

Aaaand that's it! Happy ending for you all!

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[justicegundam82]

Hackmaster to PF1 Conversion: Boarfolk

Hello! Here is my latest conversion... a rather simple one, all things considered, this one coming from the Hackmaster tabletop games.

I should add that I got some ideas from the work of the Creature Codex blog, who converted the Pigfolk some time ago.

I hope you will enjoy my conversion, and as always, tell me if there is something I should improve.

BOARFOLK

Image (c) GreyRat48 on DeviantArt

This humanoid creature is tall and well-built, with the head of a wild boar and covered in hirsute, coarse fur.

BOARFOLK                       CR 2

XP 600

CG Medium Humanoid

Init +0; Senses low-light vision, scent; Perception +3

DEFENSE

AC 15, touch 10, flat-footed 15 (+4 natural, +1 shield)

hp 19 (3d8+6)

Fort +5, Ref +1, Will +1

Defensive Abilities ferocity

OFFENSE

Speed 40 ft.

Melee obsidian machete +5 (1d6+2 / 19-20; fragile) and bite -1 (1d4+1); or bite +4 (1d4+2)

Ranged sling +2 (1d4+2)

Special Attacks hatred (orcs)

STATISTICS

Str 15, Dex 10, Con 14, Int 15, Wis 11, Cha 8

Base Atk +2; CMB +4; CMD 14

Feats Power Attack, Weapon Focus (machete)

Skills Climb +6, Craft (weapons) +6, Knowledge (any one) +8, Perception +3, Profession (any one) +8, Survival +4

Languages Common, Orc

Special Qualities erudite

ECOLOGY

Environment temperate and cold forests

Organization solitary, pair, gang (3-10 plus 1 leader of level 2-4) or village (10-60 plus 1 lieutenant of level 2-4 every 20 individuals, 1 druid/shaman of level 4-6 and 1 chief of level 5-7)

Treasure standard (obsidian machete, sling with 20 bullets, buckler, other treasure)

SPECIAL ABILITIES

Erudite (Ex): A boarfolk can choose a single Knowledge skill to always be considered a class skill for him. Boarfolk usually choose Knowledge (engineering) or Knowledge (nature) for this ability.

Hatred (Ex): Boarfolk gain a +1 racial bonus on attack rolls against humanoid creatures of the orc subtype because of their special training against these hated foes.

Boarfolk are a surprisingly ancient race, rumored to be the original ancestry that orcs and pigfolk originated from. Unlike their brutish cousins, however, boarfolk have a rather sophisticated culture with intricate religious practices, and their cities are known for their remarkable innovations and efficiency. Most of them have a natural predilection for mathematics and physics. Boarfolk communities tend to be relatively small, living in simple but well-constructed villages hidden in deep forests, where they use trees for their shade and natural beauty.

Not ones to neglect their physical prowess either, boarfolk are trained in fighting from an early age, and are known for their skill in using their specially-forged obsidian weapons. They tend to be peaceful and avoid unnecessary violence, but their closeness to crueler and more belligerent orc subraces is a sore point for boarfolk - they regard orcs as degenerates, and pigfolk as abominations who offended their deities in ages past with some horrific sacrilege, and the hatred is very much mutual. The pigfolk's tendency for worshipping Great Old Ones lends credence to these rumors, but nothing definite is known. In any case, comparing boarfolk to pigfolk is a safe way to earn the boarfolk's scorn and irritation.

Boarfolk tend to revere gods of nature or Primal Spirits, and many of their rites revolve around trees. Most of their divine spellcasters are druids, but shamans are quite common as well. Arcane spellcasters are rather common as well, as a boarfolk's sharp mind is surprisingly apt for the study of such magic.

Boarfolk are rather large for Medium creatures, and they average about 7 feet in height, while weighing 300 pounds.

[the-whatcherof-89]

Scar “Good Times” Scardalph Aka Mr Landscape the magic man.

CR 20 N Humanoid

XP 307,200 (if used as npc for encounter)Half elf Alchemist 17 (Clone master) Rogue 3 (Charlatan)

Neutral (with chaotic tendencies) Medium humanoid, elf Init +4; Senses Perception +37

AC 36, touch 21, flat-footed 24 (+4 Dex, +7 Shield, +5 Deflection, +1 Intuition, +9 Armor) Hp 176 (20d8+83)

Fort +22, Ref +24, Will +16

Speed 30 ft. Melee Animate staff+16/11/6 1D6+2/1D6+2, +15/10/5 Poisoners gloves. Ranged Alchemist Atlatl+22/22/17/12 Bombs, Infusions. 

Racial Elven immunities, Round ears, Elf blood, Multitalented(+3Hp +17 Skill points).

Traits Dyslexic, Incurable sickness, Hedge magician, Trade talk(Engineering).

Class features Bomb 9D4, Alchemy, Mutagen, Persistent mutagen, Throw anything, Poison resistance +4, Discoveries (Extend potion, Dilution, Combine extracts, Alchemical simulacrum, Doppelgänger simulacrum, Preserve organs, Explosive bombs, Enhance potions), Brew potions, Swift alchemy, Swift poisoning, Poison use, Natural born liar, Sneak attack +2d6, Evasion, Rogue talent(Rogue Finesse).

Str 12, Dex 18, Con 18, Int 28, Wis 18, Cha 12

Base Atk +14/9/4; CMB +15; CMD +29

Feats Smoke bombs, Cognatogen, Greater cognatogen, Point blank shot, Precise shot, Infusion, Precise bombs, Spontaneous healing, Promethean disciple, Fast bombs.

Skills Acrobatics+12, Appraise+17, Bluff+10, Climb +10, Craft(Alchemy)+30 (Redstone)+20 (Stone and metal)+32, Diplomacy +10, Disable device+27, Disguise +10, Escape artist+10, Fly +10, Heal+14, Intimidate +5,Knowledge (Arcana)+30 (Dungeoneering+32 (Local)+13 (Nature)+20, Linguistics+3, Perception+27, Perform(sing) +5, Profession(Engineer)+27, Sense motive+12, Spellcraft+32, Sleight of hand+12, Stealth+12, Survival+12, Swim+10, Use magic device+24.

Languages Common, Elf, Draconic, Aquan, Terran, Ignan, Undercommon, Alko.

Combat gear Mithral chainshirt+5 Impervious ghost touch, Ring of protection+5, Animated Darkwood shield+5 Impervious Arrow-catching, Ioun stones(Dusty rose prism, Lavender and green ellipsoid), Alchemical atlatl+4 of speed, Animate staff, 20 Alchemical bullets, Headband of mental prowess+6(INT, WIS, Dungeon), Belt of physical perfection+4, Cloak or resistance+5, Sipping jacket, Periapt of health, Sleeves of many garments, Poisoner’s gloves, Winged boots, Helm of comprehend languages and read magic(Shaped like a fancy top hat), Googles of brilliant light, Boro bead type VI and IV, Admixture vial, Campfire bead, Bag of holding type I, MWK wheelchair, Wand of protection from energy, Tome of clear thought+4(Used), Fancy dress, 200gp worth of alchemical materials, Alchemist kit, Alchemist lab, 200gp, 2 Alchemical golems(the first has a rune of shielding and it is dressed like a butler, the second is shaped like a spider can crawl on walls and can house a wheelchair), 12 Homunculi in Oompa Loompa attire.

Spellcasting CL20 DC19 formulae per day 8/7/7/6/6/3

VI-Heal, Twin form, Transmute golem. 

V-Magic jar, Spell resistance, Polymorph, Ooze form, Monstrous physique III, Languid bomb admixture. 

IV-Restoration, Stoneskin, Cure critical wounds, Freedom of movement, Dragon breath, Touch of slime.

III-Liquefy, Haste, Heroism, Cure serious wounds, Water breathing, Elemental aura, Displacement.

II-Vomit swarm, Protection from energy, Cure moderate wounds, Detect thoughts, Alchemical allocation, Barkskin, Lesser Restoration.

I-Cure light wounds, Bomber’s eye, Adhesive spittle, Detect secret doors, Ant haul, Crafter’s fortune, Firebelly, Reduce person.

Background Scar is a hilarious fellow from a far land known for his Hermits skilled in constructing magnificent structures and machineries that defies logic and reason. Despite being dyslexic, he is always in good mood and shares this good mood with the other Hermits. However, under this facade Scar is as his name suggest “Scarred” for he is afflicted by a muscular disease which is slowly taking over him. Despite everything, he smiles and keeps a happy demeanor to not bring worry to his fellow Hermits. One day as he woke up from a good night rest he started to choke and felt as if he was about to die but it passed away. A sense of dread took over almost overwhelming him… “Do you wish to be cured?” said a voice outside his bedroom door. Scar turned toward the door. “It is simple, do a mission for me and i will cure you. All you have to do is open the door accepting my request willingly. What say you little creature of flesh?” Scar thought if this was some kind of prank from his fellow Hermits but he knew no one would do something like this… nonetheless, the offer was too tempting and as he grabbed the knob he opened the door… and found himself in a different place… an old abandoned mansion. He was in a fancy dress with new equipment, knowledge and on a wheelchair. His legs where a bit shaky but he was capable of standing as he tried only to almost tumble down. But a mechanical arm reached form him, stabilizing his posture. A tall scrawny construct dressed like a butler with a jar for a head with fake mustaches helped him stand as other strange servants arrived… another large sized construct similar to a spider with a housing for his wheelchair and 12 small round brightly colored humanoids in outrageously colored attire. As soon as Scar regained his composure, they bowed to him in revered silence. “Your mission is simple… find the fragments of my lost daughter. Do it, and you shall receive gifts beyond your imagination. I will be watching.” Said the voice; Scar looked at the broken glass of the mansion and said: “Alrighty, first, let’s fix this place! We have work to do!” And he pulled up his wrists with a wide smile.

Spider Image from https://www.furaffinity.net/view/27494681/

Other images made with Hero forge.

[t0rturedangel]

lanyon with someone who's from the future and deliberately traveled to past claiming that their gadgets are from magic just to piss him off? afaik in the novel he doesn't support supernaturalism and jekyll's balderdash so the intereaction would be funny lmfao (could be platonic or romantic depends on you)

take care!

-🦋 anon

𝟎𝟎𝟏. 𝘍𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤 '𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘤'

⠀⠀⠀: ᯓ 𝟎𝟎𝟐.⠀ LANYON X READER

› 〉 𝟎𝟎𝟑. SYNOPSIS, Lanyon just doesn't believe in magic and you're not making it any easier

› 〉 𝟎𝟎𝟒. WARNINGS, none apart from maybe out of character historically wise.

› 〉 𝟎𝟎𝟓. AUTHOR'S NOTES, I'm happy to do another Jekyll and Hyde request!! :) I may have went overboard.

「 ★ 」 ⠀・At first Lanyon is gonna be very skeptical of you, I mean you're this random person (dressed in some really weird clothes btw) preaching to him about how you're 'magical', it's slightly insulting to him.

⠀「 ★ 」 ⠀・He questions you a lot, mostly the basic ones like "who are you?" and "where did you come from?" and of course, the classic "what do you want from me?" I mean lets be serious it is slightly tiring because he keeps repeating himself.

You sighed, clearly annoyed- Lanyon kept asking you the same damn questions and it was eating away at your brain, who knew someone like this would be so irritating to be around? You sure as hell didnt. "Lanyon, Lanyon- please just stop, I already told you I'm NOT an alien, or some freaky monster that's gonna come after you... jesus" "I don't believe you" you deadpanned, wow- how the actual fuck does this guy have friends "Well then why do you keep asking me these dumb ass questions?" you retorted, leaning back on your chair, blowing a rasberry to the cieling of his room.

"Well pardon me for questioning the person who just broke into my home, you should feel lucky I havent even informed the authorities." his comment made you laugh, did everyone in this time period seriously talked like this? It sounds stupid, like no one from your time line ever speaks like this, no one calls the feds the 'authorities' unless they're older than 60. Your laughing seemed to make him extremely upset, though it wasnt like he could do anything he tried when you arrived: he tried to shoot you out of terror but the moment the bullet came closer to you it disintigrated. "Don't laugh at me." "My deepest apologies my dearest gentleman!"

「 ★ 」 ⠀・Thats pretty much how your 'friendship' started, and from then on you wouldn't leave him alone, always talking about how magical you are and use your devices to annoy Lanyon. Whenever you two are alone he tries to study you to see if you're lying or telling the truth

「 ★ 」 ⠀・Since you're always around him you've got to meet his friends; Utterson and Jekyll, who liked you (but thats only because you didn't act the same as you did to Lanyon). Jekyll esspecially found you interesting but you avoided him- after all you know his secret and dont really wanna get involved with stuff like that PLUSSS you gotta keep Lanyon company.

「 ★ 」 ⠀・speaking of, whenever you're around Lanyon you use a phone, which freaks him tf out because what the hell do you mean you can text people in RUSSIA within seconds? That's impossible.... to him.

"[name]?" you heard the voice of lanyon call out to you, in turn you lifted your head and met his eyes "Yeah?" "What is that?" he pointed to your phone "It's my phone?" ... "what is a phone?"

Yeah you loved explaining a phone to him, watching his eyes buldge out of his skull as you kept talking about the internet and what Wi-fi is. Then everyday, when you two would have a chance to talk you'd show him other devices you owned, to which he'd allways call you a 'witch', whether it was a joke or not you really didn't care.

「 ★ 」 ⠀・When Lanyon found out about Hyde and Jekyll being the same person you were there, making sure to keep him as sane as possible and safe in case Hyde or Jekyll tried anything- after all you and him grew closer over the months you were with him. You did also video everything with a secret camera just incase of anything.

「 ★ 」 ⠀・You expected him to not get as sick as he did originally because you were there and shocked him but unfortunately you couldnt stop it. He was going to end up dying, and in a sad way you blamed yourself; you did force the plot forward.

"[name] I dont need you here okay? I'll be okay, my servants will take care of me" "Bullshit! they don't know anything about medication or taking care of someone" You agrued with Lanyon, staring at him solemly- he was dying and you could tell, you've seen people die like everyday (while you did glorify the future world to Lanyon it was all just you projecting, your timeline is just as bad as the medieval one). "I still have a bunch of stuff I can try to use" You rummaged through your bag after calming down, not daring to look at your friend's sad expression, it would make you emtotional too.

"If nothing can help me from your items, let alone mine, then I'm not worth it... I just still cannot wrap my head around everything." "Then dont, it will only make you worse Lan" You finally had the mental strength to look at him, seeing his pale and tired face made your heart ache, maybe if you never came he's be okay?. no of course he wouldn't be, he'd still die except it would be alone. You just thought that with your arrival and your tech you would be able to at least numb his reaction a bit but I guess seeing a murderer transform into one of your old friends would cause everyone to live in shock, or maybe not. "[Name] listen, promise me, that if I die... which I will, will you keep Utterson company? I fear at the thought of him.... or you being alone after my death"

When did he become so fucking sentimental? with a sad chuckle you responded "I thought you hated me? becuase I'm magical?" "No, I mean, I still find your antics slightly frustating but nothing can be done now. Just please promise me" "okay... fine Lanyon, I promise" ... it took him a while to answer you but he did "Thank you [name], not for just that but for being around me? I suppose your company brought me some sense of joy....." "Thank you too Lan"

「 ★ 」 ⠀・It did break your heart to see Lanyon die, but you had a promise to fufill, and that you did. You kept Utterson company until the day he found about everything too and eventually accepted everything. Even though he gave you chacne to leave him alone you didn't, afterall you had made a promise to Lanyon. What kind of a friend would you be if you didn't keep your promise? a terrible one.

「 ★ 」 ⠀・You justed hoped that Lanyon was at peace.

[pathfinderunlocked]

Armored Necrogunner - CR14 Undead

Don't put TOO many holes in 'em. We need 'em for parts.

Artwork provided by client.

"The thing about this power armor is that it gets grafted directly onto your flesh, and seared in place as the machinery overheats. Tends to make the person wearing it really complain a lot. So we switched to horrifying undead abominations; they don't mind as much since they can't feel pain.

Also, when it dies - well, it's already dead, but you know what I mean - the whole thing explodes into a swarm of rot grubs. Usually you can see those wriggling under the skin, but the armor hides it. Genius design, really."

- Necrocraft R&D Department Notes

This is a commissioned monster. Its hit points seem low at a glance, but the rot grub swarm that spawns from its corpse has another 85 HP. It doesn't precisely follow the necrocraft building rules in Bestiary 4, which require higher challenge rating creatures to be extremely big; a CR 14 necrocraft would normally be Colossal-sized. This creature uses construction points and the giantblooded template by Green Ronin Publishing to reach CR 9, but it has bonus hit dice and unique abilities to augment that, and I altered the Metal Armor necrocraft ability to match how armor actually works in Pathfinder a little better.

Although this creature can fly (flavored as a jetpack, not magic or wings), its automatic weapon is most useful if it's on the ground, since it's generally impossible to get multiple enemies in a line from the sky.

Armored Necrogunner - CR 14

Bolted directly onto the flesh of this undead giant are numerous interconnected steel plates, cords, and tubes. What's visible of the creature underneath the armor looks like a dozen different creatures stitched together. It's carrying a massive machine gun, and using a jetpack to fly.

XP 38,400 Unique advanced giantblooded necrocraft NE Large undead Init +2 Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +2 Aura stench (10-ft. radius, DC 23, sickened for 1d6+4 minutes)

DEFENSE

AC 30, touch 11, flat-footed 28 (+2 Dex, +11 natural, +8 armor, -1 size) hp 126 (12d8+72) Fort +9, Ref +6, Will +10 DR 5/slashing Resist cold 5 Immune undead traits

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft., fly 30 ft. (clumsy) (40 ft. without armor) Melee 2 claws +17 (1d6+9) Ranged mwk gatling gun +9/+4 touch (8d6, 200 ft. line, see text) or rock +10 (2d8+13) Space 10 ft.; Reach 10 ft. Special Attacks rock throwing (120 ft.), quick clear

STATISTICS

Str 29, Dex 15, Con —, Int —, Wis 14, Cha 21 Base Atk +9; CMB +15; CMD 25 Feats Toughness Skills Fly -13; -7 armor check penalty to physical skills Languages Necril (understands only; cannot speak) SQ Construction Points (additional movement [fly], mostly zombies, stench), grafted armor, rot grub infestation Gear gatling gun (see text), grafted armor (see text), 800 bullets (enough for 80 attacks with gatling gun)

SPECIAL ABILITIES

Gatling Gun An armored necrogunner uses a gatling gun that is permanently grafted onto its body, and cannot be removed without destroying it. It can be sundered as normal, and has 10 hardness and 10 hit points. This is a masterwork modern firearm with the automatic weapon quality, which deals 8d6 damage. When attacking with the gatling gun, the armored necrogunner rolls a single ranged touch attack roll with a -2 penalty against all targets in a 200 ft. line. The armored necrogunner can make multiple such attacks as part of a full-attack action.

An armored necrogunner's gatling gun misfires if it rolls a natural 1 on an attack roll. A misfire gives the weapon the broken condition, but further misfires do not cause it to explode.

A single attack with the gatling gun uses 10 bullets. The gatling gun has a chamber size of 160 bullets, and thus can make 16 attacks before needing to be reloaded; it's a move action for the armored necrogunner to reload the gatling gun to its maximum capacity.

Grafted Armor An armored necrogunner wears heavy armor that functions like half-plate except that it is permanently grafted onto the armored necrogunner's body, and cannot be removed without destroying it. It can be sundered as normal, and destroying it deals 5d6 damage to the armored necrogunner.

Quick Clear (Ex) An armored necrogunner can remove the broken condition from its gatling gun as a move action, if that condition was caused by a misfire.

Rot Gub Infestation (Ex) When an armored necrogunner dies, it explodes into a swarm of rot grubs. Creatures within a 10-ft. radius, and any spaces below that radius (for example, if the armored necrogunner is flying when it dies), must succeed on a DC 21 Reflex save or be infested with rot grubs.

On a failed save, the infested creature takes 1d4 points of Constitution damage per round as the rot grubs burrow through and consume its flesh—this effect continues as long as the victim remains in the swarm and continues for 1d6 rounds after it leaves the swarm. Any energy-based attack (including damage from negative energy) that deals at least 5 points of damage to the victim automatically destroys all of the rot grubs infesting it, ending the effect prematurely. Additionally, any effect that removes disease instantly ends a rot grub infestation. Immunity to disease offers no defense. The save DC is Charisma-based.

A rot grub swarm is left in the armored necrogunner's space after it dies. If the armored necrogunner dies while flying, the rot grub swarm falls to the ground and takes falling damage as normal. Swarms take normal falling damage.

[runrunningrunner]

When you have to cut to the bone

When everything goes south and you have to cut your budget to nothing to survive, it's a shit show. There's no magic bullet. It's emotional. There are no big wins, instead it's a game of winning by paying attention to every possible penny saved. Here's the steps we took to survive and turn it around:

Record. Cut. Save. Cook. Sell. Earn.

Below the cut are three steps - Record, Cut, and Save ...

Step One - Record

Start up a Google Spreadsheet of all your bills and expenses. Look out for recurring expenses, especially anything annual. There's nothing worse than having a really tight budget and getting hit with an annual renewal fee at just the wrong time.

Now you have a detailed picture of where your money regularly goes.

Next create a tab for upcoming events and expenses that are out of the ordinary; the annual tax and tags bill for your car, your parent's birthday, any work dues or training costs. Now you can see the next bumps in the road.

Phase Two - The Cut

Cut subscriptions and memberships. We really didn't have many, but they all went out. Yes Amazon Prime "saved" us money on delivery shipping and movies and and and ... but that spending had to stop too, so Prime had to go.

Home phone/internet/cable/cell. We cut the cable and the old landline. There's a lot of free TV and movie content online so we still watch "TV" we just don't pay for it anymore. We used to have a landline in case of power outages/storms that would disconnect us. But where we are now, our home phone comes in digitally so we'd still lose the phone in a power cut. So we just use our mobiles now. And changing your bundle of services is a good time to shop for a cheaper set of services on what you do decide to keep.

Also, you can buy digital antenna ("rabbit ears") for less than $20 to get free local TV; typically this is the main national network TV stations and PBS and a few others. It will depend where you are in the country.

A lot of the rest of the cut was just going to zero spending on anything that wasn't groceries or gas. For me that meant no bought lunches, coffees, vending machine snacks etc. during the work day.

In the short term that may also mean that you cut out any donations that you regularly make to causes/your church. You're the person in need now. You cannot give from an empty wallet. When you're back in a good place, it'll be time for you to give again.

Phase Three - Save

Look for a cheaper cell phone plan - that you can use your existing phone with (because short term you're not spending any $ on new stuff like new phones). If your plan has unlimited talk and text, you can cut way down on the data per month. Use your home (and other) wi-fi for most of your data needs. We use Boost Mobile. Cricket is another low $ provider.

Shop to save with new car and home insurance - and bundle for discounts.

Utilities equal payment plans - as we're heading into summer, our electric bill goes up with A/C usage. Spring is a good time to switch to a monthly equal payment plan; in the short term you'll avoid your electric bill jumping over the summer. In the longer term, this isn't an actual savings, it just helps manage the money better.

If your natural gas bill (heating) typically goes down in the summer, enjoy those lower bills in the summer and wait until the fall and go to equal payment plan before your high heating cost months.

Use EVERY savings channel.

Your bank may have savings deals with various brands on debit or credit card usage percentage discounts. Bank of America's is called BankAmeriDeals, Wells Fargo's is Wells Fargo Deals, Chase has one too. Online Paypal has deals, and you can use sites like Rakuten. Get into the habit of planning purchases and seeing if you can find a deal before you even make the purchase.

Use the loyalty rewards for every grocery, pharmacy store, and gas purchase. We shop at Harris Teeter (owned by Kroger); in addition to their "VIC Card" savings on produce etc. shopping there earns me gas rewards so for at least one tank a month I get up to $1 off a gallon at BP. So that's ~$13 a month for just doing what I'd do normally.

I also use loyalty rewards for 2 other gas station chains to eek every free cent of gas I can, and I use the GasBuddy app to find the cheapest gas near me.

At the grocery store, it's time to get ruthless. I'm a sale/discount king. There are certain goods (toilet paper, dish washing liquid, food staples) that you'll always need, so even if you have some at home, walk down those aisles and buy more if it's on sale.

Don't stockpile loads and loads, because you still need your $ in the bank, but just get into a rhythm of buying sale only. For example, I know that the tea Mrs. RRR likes goes on discount about every two months. When it's on sale, if I buy only 1 box, then next month I'd have to buy at full price, so when it's on sale I get 2 boxes and then I never have to buy at full price... but I don't stockpile and get 4 boxes!

When you have to buy/refill prescriptions, compare your insurance plan's rx cost with the price on GoodRx - you may be able to get a coupon code for a cheaper price.

I'm sure there's more, but this is just what we had to do.

Next up I'll write about the last 3 steps.

[amanita-phthalo]

This account is a fun little roleplay account I've made to pass the time and flesh out this character before I use it in a campaign. I will also post/reblog here all the fun D&D stuff that I see.

So, without further ado, here are some details about it:

Name: Amanita Phthalo

Nicknames: "Nita" by family and close friends, "A. phthalo" by Witherbloom friends

Species: Fairy

Species Features: Standard Fairy features, +2 Wis., +1 Cha., Use Wis. for Fairy Magic feature

Species Spells: Druidcraft, Faerie Fire (at 3rd level), Enlarge/Reduce (at 5th level)

Species Languages: Common, Sylvan

Class, Sub-Class: Druid, Circle of Spores

Class Proficiencies: Typical Druid proficiencies, Insight, Arcana

Class Features: Typical Druid features, typical Circle of Spores features, Additional Druid Spells, Wild Companion

Class Ability Score Improvement: Feat - Magic Initiate (Druid)

Magic Initiate (Druid) Spells: Shillelagh, Thorn Whip, Speak with Animals

Class Cantrips: Mending, Poison Spray, Primal Savagery

Class Spells (Prepared): Cure Wounds, Entangle, Inflict Wounds, Blindness/Deafness, Gentle Repose, Hold Person, Moonbeam, Wither and Bloom, Animate Dead, Feign Death, Gaseous Form, Revivify, Vampiric Touch

Ability Scores: Str. 8, Dex. 10, Con. 12, Int. 14, Wis. 17, Cha. 14

Background: Witherbloom Student

Background Features: Typical Witherbloom Student features

Background Proficiencies: Typical Witherbloom Student proficiencies, Alchemist's Supplies

Background Language: Primordial

Witherbloom Initiate: Spellcasting Ability is Wis. for Witherbloom Initiate Spells

Witherbloom Initiate Spells: Chill Touch, Spare the Dying, Sleep

Character Details: Chaotic Good, Ignostic, Modest Lifestyle

Hair: Plantlike, soft

Skin: Pallid, fungal

Eyes: Inky, reflective

Height: 2' 8"

Weight (lbs): 13

Age (Years): 24

Gender: Genderflux

Personality Traits: "I love brewing up a new recipe, even if some might be repulsed by my choice of ingredients. Or the final product. Or both." and "I live by my own set of weird and wonderful rules."

Ideals: "Purpose. I study because there are things I need to know. I'll find my place in the world, and I'll make the world better. (Good)"

Bond: "I do what I can to protect the natural world."

Flaw: "I speak without really thinking through my words, invariably insulting others."

Fey Characteristics: Bovine lower legs, mushroomlike body (appears outwardly normal, but has various places from which spores are released, such as the palms), plantlike hair (excluding fur), long tail

Sexuality: Asexual, Lesbian

Pronouns: (she/they)

Starting Equipment: Sling (with 20 Sling Bullets), Quarterstaff, Leather Armor, an Explorer's Pack, a Druidic Focus, an Ink Bottle and Pen, a Book on Plant Identification, an Iron Pot, an Herbalism Kit, a School Uniform, a set of Common Clothes, a Pouch containing 15 GP (Gold Pieces)

Trinkets: A child's parasol covered in moss and leaves. A pair of earrings modelled after her favorite toadstool, A. muscaria, that were gifted to her by her childhood friend before she left for Strixhaven.

(For sake of consistency/comprehensiveness, I never use she/her and they/them in the same paragraph)

(Portrait made using the Forest Fairy meiker by @elequinoa)

[theauthor0]

LE!SANS

=============================

BACKSTORY

=============================

This Sans has a similar situation to Dust/Murder!Sans expect instead of giving up entirely, he has grown an extreme hatred to the player/frisk, and with the countless genocides frisk has been doing, this sans has grown to have a split personality, one of them is called mask and the other is called truth.

Mask, the logic side of sans devised a plan, a deal with the player that he would work with them and making this game more fun and in exchanged Mask would be given some free time once in a while

The plan worked and many days, weeks, months? its unknown how long Sans has been suffering at the hands of the player but during that time Mask was able to make a machine

The Machine using the power of DT he gathered from the amalgamates and undyne, was meant to override the player power of Reset however it failed and caused an explosion

But after the dust settled it was revealed that the machine caused a rip in reality itself, this is where Sans discovered the multiverse and alternate universes

Using this knowledge from exploring the multiverse, sans was able to kick the player out of his world and killed Frisk so that the player couldn't come back

Now he exploring the multiverse seeking new knowledge and power while also protecting his timeline

=============================

SPLIT PERSONALITIES

=============================

MASK-LOGIC

TRUTH-EMOTION

=============================

BOTH PERSONALITIES

=============================

Extra Info

=============================

When referring to LE sans you either call him sans or LE (referencing their Au), mask sans doesn’t like being called mask and truth sans does not like being called truth, this is just how they refer to each

Mask and truth see each other as brothers and get along very well

=============================

LE!Sans Eyes

=============================

LE!Sans has two different battle eyes

Originally they had Patience and justice but replaced the traits in their eye and also made another battle eye for truth

Mask Magic eye- left side- patience and perseverance

Truth Magic eye- right side- kindness, integrity, justice, and bravery

This also changed their Retribution and they only activate if their using their battle eyes, The retributions still does the poison effect (1 damage a second and damage in between invincibility frames

Lasting retribution (mask sans only has this ability)-Mask sans stats will get more powerful as the battle continues, however if the opponent hits (10 or more damage) mask then it will reset to 1

Ex: 1 to 2 to 4 to 6 to 8 it increases by 2 each 1 minute if he attacks first, it will reset back to 1

Peace retribution (truth sans only has this ability)-this makes truth sans more powerful if his opponent is doing something not right/evil but will get weaker if the opponent is not evil/is nice and depending how evil they are the damage increases further.

Ex: facing nice opponent 2 damage, facing evil opponent 25 or more damage depending how evil they are

=============================

LE!Sans Blaster Modes

=============================

Mask has developed many devices and even modified his own blaster to have different modes, truth can use the mods too, truth just doesn't use them because he can't remember all of them.

Blaster Modes

Normal blaster- typical blaster, a little more power than original sans but does nothing special unless applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Bullet blaster- instead of shooting a beam, it shoots magic bullets and doesn't cost much magic, can also be applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Laser blaster- shoots a more powerful lazar that can melt steel and other metals and vaporize liquids and goop/slime, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Code disrupt blaster- used to stun an opponent but also interrupt attacks making the attack not work and if used on glitchy or error characters it can make them glitch out more like making error blind with errors, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Sentient blaster- he took inspiration from an Au where the blaster where dragon like, this blaster is similar with it being sentient and able do its own actions however it still looks like a regular gaster blaster and can be applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Weakening blaster- used to reduce the stats of foes however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Energy absorption blaster- used to absorb energy attacks and human traits, this will replenish sans magic, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Water blaster- used against ink's attacks however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Electric blaster- was made after the water blaster, thinks it will become important in the future however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Fire blaster- used to set opponents on fire or create a wall of fire however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Crash blaster- used against player's/frisk's does not kill and well makes the player crash/kicks them from the timeline, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Vacuum blaster- used to pull opponents into the blaster, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Lava Blaster- This blaster is connected to a device that absorbs the lava in HotLand, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Sandstorm Blaster- Creates a Sandstorm that blinds opponents, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Capture Blaster- shoots a beam that once hits a target contains them in a bubble and can also capture beings that do not have a physical form, however it cannot applied by Truth and Mask retribution

Mask and Truth can have more blaster modes because he still is exploring the multiverse and still doing experiments

=============================

LE!Sans Devices

=============================

LE!Sans carries many different devices and items to help him in battle, Mask is the one who mostly uses them but Truth doesn't use them that much

Devices/Items

Absorption hand- inspired by Epic he made a hole in his right hand to absorb energy/mana, it can also absorb magic from a being directly if mask is touching them

Healing potion

Code scanner- a device that lets sans see the information on an Au this also works on beings that come from an Au like outer sans or Storyshift Chara

Soul robots- after getting the souls from asgore, mask sans extracted some of the souls’ traits and mixing it with an artificial monster soul and putting it in robots. These robots aren’t as powerful as a real monster soul and human soul combined but still pack a punch and depending on the trait the robots had special abilities or advantages others did not

Telepad- a device that allows him to teleport wherever he is to the marker he set, which is at his Au

Laser pen- looks identical to a normal pen but just shoots a laser

Fake Status- this is an attachment to LE Soul, anytime a user checks their stats or mana it will show a fake reading however if his soul is damaged enough it can break

Bear traps- Anyone caught in the bear trap cannot move

Magic wand- if sans run out of magic, he can use this intill his own magic replenish

Magic potion

EpiPen of kindness- used to calm down people and monsters 

Magic disabled gun- inspired by glitchtale this gun will make the user unable to use magic for a bit

Propulsion Gauntlets- gauntlets that send the opponent flying in the opposite direction

Shockwave grenade- creates a shockwave to blast away projectiles like bones

Portable Barrier station

Cloaking device- is used to hide his Au

Reincarnation chamber- if sans dies the Machine will use will create an exact copy of sans, he made this if he was to die, this machine uses code in his Au as well a piece of him (has small that is open crack similar to gaster, one below his left eye) and this allows him to bypass death even if he was killed, erase, and even his code being deleted and any other means as well however there are 4 problems with this machine,

1. If his Au is destroyed he can no longer be revived 2. He must check the machine daily to make sure it does not malfunction 3. Sans in not technically revived, all the machine does is make a clone of him with no memories of what happened outside his Au/in the multiverse this is because the Au only keeps track of sans when he is his Au, not outside of it, however he developed a device to counter this

Memory log- connected to the custom eye and records everything that happens

Boosting potion- boost his stats

Mines

Sleeping gas

Storage cube-contains most of Mask sans devices, clothes, and food

=============================

LE!Sans Soul

=============================

Mask modified there soul in order to make himself ( and Truth) more powerful by adding cybernetic/mechanical enhancements, made 3 versions and is currently using the third version

Soul Versions

Mark 1- Mask created a shell for the soul which attaches to the soul with some wires/cables. This version did not protect their code but did increased there mana efficiency and provided protection from outside sources and attacks

Mark 2- After Mask created the reincarnation chamber, he decided this appropriate time to add some new modifications to his soul, Mask created an A.I that would do add the modifications from him, luckily it was a success and now LE Sans soul is now part cybernetic, this increases his mana efficiency even more than Mark 1, reduces gaster blaster delay, improves his body, increases his mana compacity, and blocks anyone trying to check his stats

Mark 3- This Mark combines Marks 1 & 2 this does all what Marks 1 & 2 do but has extra functions, LE can directly manipulate his own magic to do certain things and use other types of magic, and provides him with the ability Mana Sight which lets him see a beings Soul and Mana

=============================

Stats

=============================

LV:

HP: 1 [30]

ATK: 1 [20]

DEF: 1 [10] [30]

[bereasontopersistence]

I think this thing is sick as fuck. What do you think about it? Any Wi who has an opinion on it can weigh in.

🔫 Ya didn’t lie. It does look cool as hell, I’d say.

🎀 I really like the colours.. It looks like something straight from a..fantasy fiction! I think I got a grasp of the concept, at least. my parents used to give me some media’s to look at despite us being in such a harsh position … I appreciated that !

[badolmen]

God blood isn’t as lucrative a business as it sounds - what we thought might be a panacea turned acidic and medically impotent outside of the divine body. But, it has its uses for the chemists and artificers, so we collect the crimson ichor in glass bottles. As much as we can stand to without burning ourselves, anyway.

The marrow of a god’s bones is black - concentrated sins collected from their patrons and stored away for wrathful outbursts. While not legal, everyone in the business always keeps a pinch on them, in case they need to curse an unfortunate soul. And for the right price, the right person can strike a deal for their own portion of divine fury.

From the skull we harvest Grace. It is golden, oily, and, most importantly, expensive. Kings and clergy empty their coffers for a drop, but most folk can bargain a bottle from their local Hunter in exchange for good drink and the promise of peaceful sleep.

Most Hunters don’t sleep well, not after their first kill.

Some joke that the god of sleep abandoned us out of spite, or, in an effort to save their kin, attempts to drive us mad with sleeplessness. Neither is true - the god of sleep was killed long before my time. There is no king of dreams withholding rest from us Hunters. We choose sleeplessness. We tempt madness, because that is far less certain than what sleep offers.

No Hunter forgets their first kill. Mine was far too young - by most Hunters’ standards - but I’ve lived long enough to know it was as clean as any could hope for. I’ve seen far messier deaths, for gods and Hunters alike.

There is no easy death for a god. They fight it - like any living thing - but unlike mortals they fight against a fear far greater than what we can understand. Gods aren’t supposed to die. They do not know decay or entropy, their flesh isn’t made for it. So when the first harpoon pierces a wing, or a blade cleaves into bone, it is both the worst pain they have ever experienced and a pain they could not understand before experiencing it.

Gods fight death with the fear of a child recognizing their own mortality.

Which made my first kill all the more fitting, I suppose. Two children at their first reckoning with death - one at the hands of another. One surrounded by healers, burning blood gouging through mortal hands. One surrounded by butchers, cracking open a skull for the liquid gold within.

(I didn’t mean to kill her. She didn’t know she could be killed. Neither did I, until the bullet from father’s rifle sunk deep in her gut. The flowers around her feet wilted instantly, and her blood burned the grass black. My hands are still scarred to the bone from trying to stop the bleeding.)

Some are lucky in their first kills - gods of greed, hate, malice - they can take solace in the destruction of spiteful creatures with bone marrow blacker than the abyss. Not I. I killed a nature god, eternally youthful and trusting in their divinity. Somehow that makes every kill following feel more justified, more appropriate.

(Never could I sink so low as to kill gods of love and light and hope, the way some Hunters have. They see these gods as renewable, the mortal devotion to these ideals ensuring inevitable reincarnations. I know some gods don’t come back, won’t come back - they’ve met death and pain and despair, and have no intention of returning to meet them again. I fear these god of goodness too will one day choose nothingness in the face of another mortal betrayal.)

No matter your kill, you will not sleep. Not without a home brewed sleeping draft made by a desperate man hoping to heal his ailing sister. Not without the wine of an old woman trying to remember her lover’s face. Not without the tears of a daughter saying goodbye to her father for the last time. No magic or drug can offer that peace, only found in mortal acceptance of death.

(Because no matter your first kill, you will always remember it when you sleep. You will always see it from the eyes of the one you killed, and you will know pain and fear and death the way only gods can know it: with the all-consuming fear of a child, afraid of the dark, with no candle to hold.)

Edit: Donate to Palestinians in Gaza

A fantasy world with an industrial revolution, where Gods are hunted like whales were.

[gudsouplady]

Watching Sherlock (S2,E1) A scandal in Belgravia (Tw: This show has a lot of showing and mentioning of guns,Dead bodies,Drugs,War etc.If you don’t like that stuff then I advise you to not read this post) (spoilers)

• He came back

• Why is he going to shoot the bomb jacket

• “stayin alive” as Moriarty’s ringtone

• Who is Moriarty talking to ?????

• “Wrong day to die”

“Did you get a better offer”

• “I’ll make you into shoes”

• He’s gone again

• Who is Miss alder and the other woman ????

• The glorious intro

• Annoying clients

• “The geek interpreter”

• Sherlock just left

• Don’t traumatise the kids

• What happened to the guy in the car boot

• “people want to know your human”

• Sherlock is famous now

• Sherlock is in the newspaper

• Why does the woman have a whip

• Time for what ????

• What does Sherlock keep in his fridge

• I thought the guy that wondered into Baker Street dropped dead

• He’s car broke down in a fields

• Where did the guy in the red jacket go

• He died

• “Try not to punch him”

• Fields have Wi-Fi ????

• Why is Sherlock dressed in a bedsheet

• “Shut up”

• “Pass me over”

• Who wants Sherlock to go with them ?????

• “Who the hell are you”

• Why is there a helicopter for John ?????

• Buckingham palace ????

• why did John look behind Sherlock like that ????

• I love it when they laugh

• “I am seriously fighting the impulse to steal an ashtray”

• Sherlock called Mycroft the queen

• “Sherlock Holmes, Put your trousers on”

• Mycroft is done with the pair of the them

• The sheet almost went off

• He finally put his clothes on

• “I’ll be mother”

“ and there is a whole childhood in a nutshell”

• Irene Adler

• “how would you know”

• Irene and Sherlock both know of each other

• John you might want to put that cup back in your saucer

• “laters”

• He stole the ashtray

• Who is taking photos of them

• They’re both trying on clothes

• “ I always hear “punch me in the face” when your speaking but it’s usually subtext”

• Having a public street fight

• Sherlock being stupid at the door and Kate playing along

• Irene put something on, please

• Get off of Sherlock

• John definitely missed a lot

• He can’t deduct anything about Irene

• “Somebody loves you” Every single person looks at John

• “ I confiscate it”

• How does she know ???

• John managed to set the fire alarm off

• What in magical fire places is that ????

• Who shot the alarm ???

• It’s a robbery

• John almost died

• “Vatican cameos”

• Fight scene Intensifies

• He Took the phone

• Sherlock’s way of calling the police is shooting a gun

• John disappeared ???

• What happened to Kate

• What did Sherlock get injected with

• The woman who beat Sherlock Holmes’s

• she jumped out the window

• The hiker was hit by a boomerang

• The way he fell out of bed

• The text alert..

• Irene got his number

• The alert x2

• I love Mrs Hudson

• Mycroft Holmes don’t disrespect Mrs Hudson

• Text alert x3

• Everyone is suspicious of the text alert

• It’s Christmas time

• Molly looks lovely

• “ You have a photograph of me wearing that hat”

• Poor Molly

• Irene gave Sherlock the phone

• Mycroft hates Christmas

• is Irene going to die

• Irene died :(

• Sherlock never smokes

• Both brothers are sociopaths

• Another drugs bust

• They broke up

• Sherlock isn’t eating

• He got the code wrong

• John and Mrs Hudson really do care about Sherlock

• who is she

• Irene is alive

• Sherlock doesn’t reply to Irene’s texts

• Sherlock followed John

• Mrs Hudson !!!!!!!

• Sherlock saved Mrs Hudson

• John take care of Mrs Hudson

• Sherlock just shoved him out the window

• Mrs Hudson is in shock

• “You clot”

• “England would fall”

• He finally text her back

• He got the passcode wrong again

• Irene is back

• “if you were looking for baby names”

• MORIARTY IS INVOLVED

• even Mycroft but he’s ashamed

• He always talk to himself

• Irene get your hands off him

• He got taken away by the same person

• No one is ever going to put a bullet in Sherlock’s brain

• Why is the plane dark and the passengers are passed out ????

• Of course Mycroft is there

• It’s been Mycroft and Irene all this time

• Mycroft isn’t going to do anything

• What happened to Kate ??? Where did she go ???

• “ I am Sherlocked”

• The phone is unlocked

• Irene died :(

• Don’t lie to Sherlock

• Give Sherlock the phone

• She got saved by Sherlock

• “The woman”

I rate this episode a 10/10 because it was a very interesting episode

[the-whatcherof-89]

Iskall aka Isgall “Kal” Bengrip.

Human Gunslinger(Guntank)17 Shield marshal 3 XP 307,200 (if used as npc for encounter)

Neutral (with chaotic tendencies) Medium Humanoid

Init +9; Senses Perception +43

HP214(20d10+100)

AC43(+6Shield+5Deviation+14Armor+5Natural+3Dex)

BaB+20 CMB+23 CMD+32

SavesFORT+20 REFL+25 WILL+30

Racial traits: Alchemically enhanced +1 Skill point/level

Traits: Competitive, Provincial.

Class abilities: Gunsmith, Grit(21 points), Improved armor and shield proficiency, Guntank’s resolve, Guntank’s resilience, Bullet deflection, Armor training 4, Technic training(one handed firearms, two handed firearms, heavy weaponry), deeds, Eye for detail, Legal judgement 1/day, Danger sense, Gun marshal, Labyrinthine cunning.

STR16 DEX28 CON20 INT20 WIS28 CHA7

Feats: Master crafter, Cosmopolitan(Draconic, Alko, Knowledge Arcana, Use magic device), Quick draw, Deadly aim, Extra grit, Technologist, Point blank shot, Precise shot, Rapid shot, Signature deed-Targeting, .

Skills: Acrobatics+32, Bluff+2, Climb+11, Craft(Stone and metal)+28, Diplomacy+6, Disable device+10, Intimidate+6, Handle animal+2, Heal+17, Knowledge (Arcana)+28 (Engineering)+28 (Local)+13, Perception +33, Profession(Architect)+22, Ride+14, Sense motive+22, Sleight of hand+17, Stealth+32, Swim+10, Survival+16, Use magic device+21.

Languages: Common, Orc, Dwarven, Draconic, Alko.

Equipment: Rail gun, Zero rifle, Zero pistol, Chainsaw, Autograpnel, 1000 Batteries, Adamantine longsword+5, Amulet of natural armor+5, Ring of protection+5, Mithral full plate of speed+5 Improved shadow, Living steel animated heavy shield+4, Ioun stones: Ioun torch, Lavender and green ellipsoid, Belt of physical might+6(Dex, Con), Cloak of resistance+4, Headband of mental prowess+6(Int, Wis, Arcana), Cybernetic eye, Beneficial bandolier, Wands(Recharge),Bag of holding II, Winged boots, Manual of quickness of action+2(used), Tome of understanding+4(used), Potions: Cure critical wounds(4), Heroism(4), Water breathing(1), Displacement(1), Gaseous form(1), Gunslinger kit, 723gp, 2 Huge ice elementals shaped like wolves, Certificate of Diorite critic.

Background: Iskall is an inhabitant of the land of hermits known for his fierce critic over diorite(he call it bird p**p) and cybernetic eye. Before joining into the land of hermits and making cool buildings “ice cold as he is” (as he defines himself) he participated in various competition of combat where he shined and was considered a master. Like a gladiator he had a great amount of glory and revels in it but decided to depart and have a change in life becoming the beloved, eccentric, funny and bubbly person that he is today. One day, while he was cleaning his house, he found a chest with some of his belonging from his days in the Arena. As he looked at it, memories runned through his being and also how he lost his eye and replaced it with a cybernetic one. “…glory of combat…” someone suddenly whispered in his ear. He looked around, but there was no one. “…you want it…” continued the whispering voice. “What is going on?! Who are you?!” Iskall started to panic as he pulled out his sword. “I am… CONFLICT… BATTLE… GLORY… BLOOD… HONOR… WAR…” A glow came out of the chest as one of the rusty weapons of Iskall was illuminating the room with a red gloomy light. “Admit it… you miss… the… THRILL.” Iskall looked at the weapon as the glow enveloped his face. “Do not… deny it… your past.” All the memories before becoming a hermit flooded his being. Guns ablaze, hot smoking metal, running, shooting, taking cover, the bloodshed, the rush of adrenaline. “Satisfy… your needs… sate mine… attain a wish…” another voice spoke “…bound only by your imagination.” Iskall hesitated at first, but then… he reached for the gun and he was catapulted into an arena where Pigmen stood atop the stairs in the Nether, shouting war chants… that he somehow understood. The warchief of the Pigmen stood up from his throne and shouted, his slaves opened the gates, and a flood of creatures poured in, and the battle started. “As I always said: Business in the front, party in the back!” And he aimed his rifle at a group of Pigmen.

Image made using Heroforge.

[evokersapprentice]

The Squishy Caster

Continuing on the theme of my previous musing, I am sold on the idea that a well-built wizard can be as resilient as any martial character.

AC vs DEX

They don't start with armour proficiencies, but AC is easy to sort. Even without multiclassing or bladesong, every wizard has access to a Mage Armour + Shield combo which puts them at 18 + DEX for AC. This is better than even the best medium armour with a shield (17 + up to 2 DEX), and rivals the best heavy armour (20 flat) assuming at least 14 DEX, which I have.

Heavy armour in general seems thoroughly underwhelming. If a character has 14 DEX, only full plate actually rivals medium armour, and only by +1, and at the cost of stealth and a 15 strength requirement. It's presented as an upgrade, but it's effectively a concession for those classes who can't afford the DEX. If you have the DEX, you just don't need it.

I'm speaking as a character born with it, but the DEX investment seems worth it anyway. One of my recurring 'unpopular opinions' about gameplay as a wizard is that AC is massively overrated. It's only really relevant when you're being attacked at close-quarters, and you can usually avoid that or quickly escape to distance. One of the underrated strengths of wizards is that most of our attacks can operate at range, and we have the abilities to get to that range - flight, flying mounts, and teleportation without opportunity attacks.

Equally important to AC, but seemingly more often overlooked, are DEX saves, which come up a lot for me in terms of AOE damage (CON and WIS are also important, but I don't encounter those quite as often at this stage). So investing in DEX from the start, as a way to protect against two birds with one stone (+2 to both DEX and AC), seems like a no-brainer. You're then better off than someone who just got heavy armour and STR.

Balancing equipment

This is of course subject to magically enhanced alternatives. As I mentioned in a previous post, martial characters have the option to upgrade with +1 shields or armour or both, and over a lucrative campaign they could end up with +2 or +3 to their AC by the middle levels. More, if they can bag a Ring or Cloak of Protection, which they will probably claim from the party loot on the basis they get hit the most and are taking the bullets for everybody else.

I may be biased (I definitely am), but I think that the Wizard is the most important member of the party not to be hit. This is in part due to their supposed squishiness, but mostly because of the value of their concentration. If I can summon a creature or effect which is basically as impactful as one of the other members of the party, but would lose it instantly on taking a blow, it's worth keeping both of us safe. I'm fighting for two.

However, I can see the argument that a tank basically helps to keep us safe more than enhancing our own defences, because they're taking on the role of our bodyguard. No shield is better than having your Fighter stand in front of you and opportunity attack anybody who tries to get past. I'm happy for them to be buffed, knowing that I'll get a lot of that benefit. Every attack that they absorb is one that could have been aimed at me.

Magic invulnerability

But then there are other spells. Not just Shield, which with medium armour (thank you, Artificer dip) can get me to a ridiculous tank-level 24 AC, for a first level spell slot I only need to use as rarely as it is required.

I'm talking about Mirror Image. A second level slot, but no concentration, and it will last for the average combat if you can get it up beforehand. That buys you a 75% chance that the first attack that targets you will miss, a 65% for the second, and a 50% on the third (assuming 12+ attack rolls each time, and even better if not).

That's before counting your own AC or so on. For illustration, a melee attacker with an impressive +8 modifier has to roll a 16 or higher to hit you. That's already just a 25% of success. With Mirror Image, they only have a 6% chance of hitting you, a 63% of hitting one of your duplicates (increasing the next chance of hitting you to 8%!), and a 30% chance of doing nothing at all. That's one hell of a buff. You're almost comfortable in melee at this point.

Optionally, there's Sanctuary (thanks again, Artificer). A first level slot, and probably only until your next turn, but you can temporarily further shield yourself if you end up stuck in melee and need another turn to get out (or fear opportunity attacks), or come up against an annoying ranged opponent. Anyone who targets you has to make a WIS saving throw, or redirect to someone else. Melee attacks may have no other option.

You can also keep this running if you don't need to attack or cast a spell which impacts an enemy creature - for example, if you're running a support role, or if you've already got an ongoing spell up and running and just need to protect your concentration whilst it works. I read this as being able to have an Animate Objects or Bigby's Hand doing the damage whilst I heal my friends using my action, as an apology for redirecting any attacks to them. If you're trapped in a kill-box with melee opponents, this could be a great option to have.

Blink fascinates me. A third level slot, fine, but it gets you a 50% chance of vanishing at the end of each of your turns, still being able to see what goes on in your absence, and with an optional 10ft teleport each time. Again, it runs for the length of an average combat, and renders you effectively invulnerable half of the time. None concentration. Get this running at the same time as Mirror Image, and the average hit rate goes down to 3%.

Even if an enemy is locked on and desperate to hurt you, they probably won't get to do it before they die. Even if they get three attacks per turn, they'll have the chance once in eleven turns. Add Sanctuary, and even particularly wise enemies (+5 WIS) will halve their chances to target you again. You're not quite invulnerable, and AOE attacks will still hurt, but you can probably walk up to most monsters and boop them on the nose.

If you're really afraid, and up against something like a breath attack, you can then top all of that up with something like a Polymorph to soak up the first 60 damage for your team. The above spells don't need concentration, so they can apply their buffs to a Giant Ape. Leave off Sanctuary and you can be melee brawling for a while, and even if you do get hit you'll return as a wizard with full HP and saved spell slots.

Then of course you have Silvery Barbs for any attack roll that does make it through the net. Was it a 6% chance of hitting you? With the option to make them roll again, it's now a 0.03% chance. The only danger is big AOE attacks (on the half of turns when Blink doesn't work), and then you have decent DEX (as above) and Absorb Elements to soak up half of it. That's more than any of the martial guys have.

Mitigation and optimisation

At one point I read an article that tried to dispel the 'myth' of the squishy spellcaster, which oddly didn't go into most of the spells above, but tried to argue that thanks to Shield plus armour giving a 24 AC the Wizard is a better tank than the Fighter is. Flipping that stereotype, it even argued that the Fighter is fairly squishy and would be better off shooting crossbows from range.

Despite my bias, I don't think that's entirely fair. For one, the Wizard's resilience relies on multiclassing, but the Fighter in this model isn't given the same opportunity to pick up Shield, Absorb Elements etc. from a multiclass of their own. It's really an argument that a composite armour + caster is best, combining the best of both worlds, which is a fair case from either direction, rather than holding one over the other.

In terms of optimising those character roles, with a tanky Wizard and a crossbow expert Fighter, I think that entirely depends on the rest of your party. This is a team game, and optimisation doesn't happen in a vacuum. I've found various synergies with my friendly Fighter, who enjoys playing a tank: I don't need to use my spells or concentration on defence or battlefield control, because he holds the line for free. He draws melee attackers to him as the closest target, soaks them up, and keeps them in place with Sentinel and opportunity attacks.

Many guides will say that the Wizard is supposed to do that job, but I can't help that most of my battlefields are already under control. My Fighter is difficult terrain in human form. He's a one-man Wall spell, doing damage each turn to anybody stuck in his range, and with a high save to get out of it. Rather than trap them twice, I'm better off dumping damage on them whilst they're stuck.

Optimised wizard-players talk about casting spells like Web, but I've never really had a use for it. Where another level of control is required, my friendly Druid likes Entangle, which is functionally the same and cheaper. The Fighter can do most of it for free, whilst still being in the best possible position to attack (and with an opportunity attack each turn, which would be lost if he sat at range).

The role the party needs the most, and which other people can't provide for a lower cost, is that of blaster. There's another great overlap there as an Evocation Wizard, because the Fighter's habit of keeping a group of melee foes clustered around him is ideal for a Fireball. He sets them up for me to knock down, whilst still knocking them down himself. His presence alone on the front line is as powerful as any of my concentration spells, and frees me up to use a different one.

The article I read decided that tanks weren't worthwhile, and that an optimised party would all be at range, but that isn't my experience at all. If we were all at range, the enemies might decide to target me - either with a ranged attack of their own (and I'm sure a DM would quickly match the crossbows if we went down that route), or by running at the most squishy-looking target. Having a front line and a back keeps the fighting all concentrated far away.

Maybe the Crossbow Expert Fighter can maximise his damage, although I don't know if that factors in the lost opportunity attack for the Sentinel (swapping feat for feat). But even if he does, it comes at the cost of me being at risk, and having to worry about my concentration, and I don't think that's great for our damage output as a team. It also means the enemies won't bunch up, which is a shame.

Weirdly, I think that claim goes both too far and not far enough. It's needlessly insulting to the Fighter, who does do a really good and valuable job up front, but it doesn't push the Wizard supremacy to its limits. Yes, we're not necessary as squishy as people think. But I wouldn't want to advertise that too much, or to let it change our behaviour, because I still believe we're the party member you least want getting hit.

Even if we can match the Fighter for AC, the Wizard should be behind them in the firing line. Not necessarily because we're more vulnerable to attack, but because our safety is more important. The HP factor is still huge. If the Fighter has almost twice my health, he can take one or two hits that I can't. Even speaking objectively, it's best to keep the whole party upright for as long as possible (maximum action economy etc.), so it makes sense to direct attacks to those with the HP to spare.

That's without getting into value judgements about who has the ability to most impact a conflict, which you could argue either way. But it's another objective fact that a Wizard's impact is directly tied, via concentration, to remaining unhurt - in a way that a Fighter's isn't at all. A big hit to a Fighter gets them feeling a bit nervous. A big hit to a Wizard may knock them down in one, and almost definitely costs them their big, powerful concentration spell. Either way, it's a massive reduction to the attacking potential for the team.

That means that the dynamic should remain, squishiness aside. Even if the Wizard is more shielded than the Fighter, it can make sense for the Fighter to play the tank, given that they're hardly vulnerable themselves. If the Wizard (24 AC) has a 25% chance of being hit compared to the Fighter's (22 AC) 30%, it still makes sense for the Fighter to be the one who runs that risk. Over the course of a combat, the team will be better off. The Fighter also has the option of emergency self-healing, and the Wizard is better placed to heal the Fighter if required.

As a final note on the DM crossbow point, I think that this applies to a lot of optimisation. The game is not static, and can't really be broken, because the DM can always up the difficulty level and throw your own tricks back at you. This is why I don't have time for Peace Clerics. On paper, adding a d4 to everything everyone does sounds great, but it's easy enough for the DM to recognise the shift in levels and just make everything a d4 harder.

It's far better to have imbalanced skillsets within your team, so that you each have an advantage in certain situations, because a good DM can't leave anyone behind. A mixture of melee and ranged attackers leaves you ready for any situation, but means you still have to adapt and think about your tactics each time, with plenty of space for you and the DM to work with. If you build your team 100% ranged, the DM is forced to do the same, and then you cancel out your whole advantage.

[alexxuun]

It was a challenge to try balancing stats that’s both would be playable and Trigun-accurate but here’s basically my thought process.

Vash:

For Vash, I took a more character-accurate approach and make him a little bit more OP than the average player.

-High STR and CON due to being a plant, also because Fighter class.

-High WIS due to life-expierience and survival skills, also because Druid class.

-have some CHA for persuasion and deception to hide his identity and appear more harmless.

-Average DEX and INT, basically throw away stats. INT is low because he have less knowledge about this planet. Would have made DEX higher since Vash can dodge bullet but that’s too insane of a stats line up.

Wolfwood:

Also taken more of a lore approach.

-high STR for both Warlord and Paladin class and the fact that he carrying his Punisher around on the daily. Also superhuman strength due to experimentation.

-extremely high CON due to experimentation, numbs to pain and viles. More lore related.

-CHA is above average, mainly because intimidation.

-average DEX since he doesn’t dodge, he just use his punisher as a shield.

-average to below WIS and INT due to education background. Also throw away stats.

Meryl:

She have a pretty standards character stats since she’s pretty human. Her is more base on class.

-high INT and above average WIS due to wizard class. Book smart, know about the in and out of this land both from travelling and being a reporter/journalist.

-above average CHA for persuasion and being a likable person.

-average to low STR, DEX and CON since she’s pretty human.

Milly:

She was a strange one because character-wise, not built to be a stealth ranger. Weapon-wise? Yeah, she got it. So I built her stats in a very not-your-average-ranger-type.

-STR is high being both strong and casually carrying her stun gun around.

-DEX is high due to ranger class. I actually wanted to make this stats low because character-wise, she would be very bad at stealth and she wouldn’t even do it. She’d just face them up front but I take an L so at least it’s a playable stats for ranger.

-Above average CHA because SHE’S LOVELY, OK???

- above average WIS for ranger class and perception.

-average to low CON and INT since average human built and also throw away stats.

Bonus Knives (if he was a player instead of a DM):

I would say he shares a lot of similar traits to vash being a Plant. I think he would be a combination of druid and sorcerer since he always has an affiliation with “magic and technically his “magic” ability is inherited. Some might think he could be a rogue but I wouldn’t say sneaking up on people isn’t his fighting style. He’s cunning sure but he’s the type to go up front because he KNOWS he can win. He’s obviously lawful evil with the whole “doing it for the better good” mind set.

-High CHA for intimidation and deception.

-High INT and STR.

-Low CON because he’s a little bitch when it comes to pain.

Trigun DnD AU

Oh, you think I’m being normal about this? Do you think a normal person could make this?? (Drop lore and run)