#METAPHOR REFANTAZIO IS ON MY BRAIN OKAY. OKAY

[cloudbends]

Actually fuck it I've been so inactive on here for the past 3 weeks im gonna start yapping.

[ruruas]

Metaphor ReFantazio is slowly disappointing me

This is an incomplete review. I haven't finished the game yet, and don't even know if I will be doing a 'full review', so I'm just dumping my thoughts here so far to see if anyone agrees with me.

Spoilers up until around 8/19 in-game

I've had it with Persona 5's influence

When I first opened the game, I felt like I was playing Persona 5 all over again. I mean this in a good way, as playing Persona 5 at the ripe age of eleven made it burrow deep into my brain chemistry. As I continued on, it still felt like I was playing Persona 5. This time in a bad way.

I understand that this is made by the same studio and people behind P5 but really? Okay, the game follows a date system. Well, that's fine, it's nice to keep the game following a journey marked by the date, its charming. Ah, there's a day-to-night time management system too. Well, that's quite similar to Persona. In fact, it's one of the things that makes Persona unique as well. Oh, look at that! There's a social link system so you can 'deepen your bonds' with the characters that works almost exactly like Persona. And there's a social stat system that works exactly like Persona, and even certain aspects of the gameplay are like Perso-

It'sL exhausting. Like enough is enough. I thought Metaphor was supposed to be something wholly unique that was supposed to be something new for Atlus to explore? That's what I picked up from the way they spoke about the game, at least. (If I'm wrong here and Atlus did somehow say "Actually, the game is exactly like Persona", do let me know). I know Atlus can create games that aren't Persona (see: Catherine) but it seems as though they've lost that ability.

The reason why Metaphor being like Persona is so horrible (even if that's what Atlus wants) is because it shows a lack of creativity within the company. Through all this development, all I've gotten so far is the feeling that I'm seeing a video game created by someone who has only ever played Persona 5. Look at Suda51. He's made countless games all with different gameplay systems and stories. Killer 7 is nothing like No More Heroes which is nothing like Flower, Sun and Moon. Those three games (if you are unfamiliar) have different visual styles, different tones, and different gameplay. What they do share are the themes, the 'vibe', that special Suda51 touch (for example, NMH and K7 both explore the lives of people who kill, but one tends to be more comedic and the other more serious).

I know this makes no sense if you've never played these games, but my essential point is that it's not an excuse for Atlus to make Metaphor a copy of Persona just because that's what they do best. If this game studio really is as innovating as they want to seem, they should be able to imbue their special 'touch' to Metaphor without giving me Persona 5: Medieval ver.

There's something odd about the character designs

I may have been very aggressive about the general similarities that this game has to Persona 5 (Pardon my passionate opinions) however on this topic I'm quite unsure what to even make of it.

Something about the way the characters are designed... don't match each other. I'd like to say that I believe the first four party members, MC (+Gallica too sure why not), Strohl, Hulkenberg, and Heismay all look great. I love their designs, but I can see how some may dislike it For example, one of my friends hates how Hulkenberg wears both navy blue and black in her design. I don't see the issue, but to each their own.

And then there's Junah.

Why does she have a 70s theme going on? That's my only question. It genuinely makes her look so out of place. She looks fine and cute on her own, but when you place her next to other characters...

It's not just me, right? There's something weird here. Alot of the characters don't seem to look like they belong in the same world together. I understand how that's the point, as one of the themes in the game is division of people (ah, classic fantasy racism) but its sometimes just very obvious in-game, especially with the models of the characters. Junah is so much brighter than Louis, Fidelio and Basilio in his scene, I would at least think the game's characters would have similar color palettes.

Furthermore, if Basilio and Fidelio are Louis's right-hand men, why do they look so bland? There's Louis with his overly complicated Genshin Impact-esque hunk of bright armor and then the two men who are supposed to be his closest supporters just look like normal people who were suddenly pulled from the street to join him. It's even weirder when you realize the box art makes the characters look much cooler than they really are,

And the concept art is even cooler.

So, what exactly is happening here? I'm going to blame it on how 3D versions of Soejima's art style doesn't look as good as the 2D versions, how there must have been a change in direction between the concept art and final art (bring back beta Hulkenberg!) and generally perhaps low-quality cutscenes and models. The only characters who consistently looks good throughout the art, anime cutscenes and 3D cutscenes is probably Louis and the MC.

It kind of feels like every character has their own version of "fantasy character" going on. Wish whatever version Louis has is applied to everyone...

Miscellaneous bullet list

The game doesn't give you enough Archetype experience to really take advantage of the new system

Louis so far seems to be oblivious to the MC's plan which I don't like. I can't exactly comment on the story though, as I haven't finished the game. It's simply something that worries me.

I wish Rella would join instead of Junah. No real reason I just like Rella more over Junah.

Something in my heart has high hopes for Eupha

I am scared to death that there's going to be a difficulty jump (a la SMTV)

That's all. Rant over!

[nebulousneuroticism]

I had stress dreams last night. When I awoke, I was ruled by anxiety about the upcoming game night, and I spent too long in bed, dozing in my unhappy dreams.

I accomplished only one thing before the game, which was to buy some groceries. It was one of those situations where I had an Event to worry about, and therefore I was not allowed to do anything except worry and prepare for the Event, even though the Event was several hours away. So I got my groceries, but couldn't convince myself to do anything else before D&D time.

The game went better than I had feared. I was too early, and had to kill some time by wandering the game store for a bit, but once some of the group showed up it was fine. The session went okay, though I was a bit rusty and slow. I felt pretty tired and overstimulated by the end.

For the rest of the night, I let my brain cool down from all the socializing. I took a shower, made a frozen pizza, and once I felt a little more like myself, played the new Limbus Company update. A fun way to spend the night.

I wish I had been productive today, but... well, maybe it'll be less taxing next week, as I get back into the groove of being comfortable with DMing. I feel mostly fine tonight, though I've stayed up a bit too late in order to let my brain cool down.

I guess I have one problematic emotion right now, which is shame. Shame about money, in particular. I've been living off of my savings for some time, and I am not in a dire financial situation; I will be fine for a while, and even if I were not, I know I would have little trouble finding a job or getting help from my family or friends. I know this. And I know that this path is good for me; I feel happier now than I have for years and years, and I am hopeful that my project may turn into something with real financial value. So I know, in my mind, that this is nothing to be ashamed of--it is a risky but carefully-considered choice.

And yet, despite that knowledge, I feel this growing shame deep within me, shame that deepens each time I spend any money. Like I am worth nothing without a steady paycheck; like my friends and family must be looking down on me. How stupid and foolish and spoiled I must seem. When I check my bank account, I feel a pit in my stomach. This gnawing shame.

I often wonder when and why money became such a central part of my value system. When did I learn this? Who taught me that my moral worth is tied so intrinsically to money? I tried asking my mom about it once, but she did not understand. I suppose these sorts of things usually come from one's parents, but I can't think of an instance when I was taught this lesson. Perhaps, as I have realized with some other topics, the more salient fact is that I was not taught about it at all: I was never given an allowance, for example, or encouraged to save up in order to buy myself things as a child. Perhaps, in the absence of those lessons, I learned instead that money is a thing to be hoarded, an end in itself, rather than a tool to be used.

I suppose that is one story I could spin, one way of understanding my childhood. And as I mentioned, I can tell similar stories about other topics--relationships and sex, for example (my parents never gave me The Talk). But is it the right story to tell? Or is it simply a shifting of blame, offloading responsibility for my own flaws onto an innocent party? I don't know.

Well, anyway. The point is, I promised to play Space Marine 2 with my best friend tomorrow, and it's a sixty-dollar game, so I feel kind of bad. Plus I was excited to play Metaphor: Refantazio too, and it's a seventy-dollar game. So... that's what kicked off this particular bout of angst.