#Luke: ...do you think maybe he noticed all the stalking and got the wrong idea

[nevertheless-moving]

Lost Luke Part Three

Star Wars Time Travel AU #19  (Wholesome Luke Time Travel AU) Part One . . . Part Two

One of the best things to imagine in this au is how the Skywalkers interact with Obi-Wan Kenobi because this is just before/interrupts the incidents that profoundly broke their faith in him but after he earned their unshakeable devotion (that is, to say, after he met them).

Anakin: “So you lived with your Aunt and Uncle but Obi-Wan was the one who actually raised you, right?” Luke, who has barely ever had a conversation with Old Ben: “No, I mean he seemed cool obviously but no. I mean he was around sometimes I guess...” Anakin, nodding knowingly: “Yeah, he totally raised you. He’s stealthy about that sort of thing.” Luke: ...?

Later on, as Luke is learning about the force and stuff, he starts to get a little bit more of a sense of how Ben had in fact been a feature in his life 

(he’s been hired on as civilian mechanic with the 501st. Obviously this should be banned because a) that’s not a thing and b) attachment, but consider: He’s genuinely talented at everything, the Council reluctantly kind-of liked this one, Anakin pulled the slave card right when the council was at peak-slave guilt, Obi-Wan was quietly sure if they said no Anakin would quit, and also when Palpatine first heard about twin brother he went, ‘oh, worm?’ (The whole Luke vs Palpatine is a separate thing))

Pretty much everything he figures out about Ben on Tatooine is just- really sad. Like, he knew the Jedi were gone and Ben was upset about it but the Jedi are clearly Obi-Wan’s entirely family and culture oh my gods he really didn’t have anything did he.

And Luke doesn’t quite share Anakin’s conviction that Obi-Wan was on Tatooine just for him- it is in Hutt space, not a bad spot for avoiding imps. Luke was maybe a coincidence, or a bonus. Why else would he wait so long to actually introduce himself? It’s uncomfortable either way to think about this incredible Jedi Master and General fallen so low, an outcast and a drunk. But living on Tatooine for the sole purpose of being the same vague proximity as his dead friend’s son would be...yikes, pretty tragic.

The more he meditates and learns, the more he feels that something about Obi-Wan’s force-signature is familiar, but he can’t quite make it match up with his hazier pre-training memories. 

It’s not until Obi-Wan is truly miserable- maybe a trooper Obi-Wan tried desperately to save dies in his arms- that Luke goes oh. Because the ozone-heavy-petrichor-aura of Obi-Wan’s grief is a lot more familiar. 

The impression of Obi-Wan’s quiet sadness clung to the incredible hand carved ships Luke found on Shmi’s grave as a child, and ok that explains where those came from. 

A few nights when he was young he tasted the scent on the wind, always when there rumors about Sand People Raids, and that also explained how their homestead sometimes seemed mysteriously protected, even if Owen’s irritation and anger about the fact still didn’t make sense.

One time while racing alone in begger’s canyon he had panicked at the rumble of a Krayt dragon beneath his speeder, only to nearly crash in relief when a mating call from over the ridge redirected it. He had even tried to describe the petrichor smell to his friends but everyone in town acted like he made the whole thing up, because Old Ben had even been seen leaving town around the same time and he didn’t look eaten either.

The time he most vividly remembers the force-impression was just a couple years ago, when he and Biggs were in trouble with some of Jabba goons over a complete misunderstanding- long story. Luke admitted that he might have been a little drunk- again, a total misunderstanding. He and Biggs were hiding under a filthy cantina table when they heard shouting just outside, one of the voices recognizable as a particularly sadistic enforcer. Someone entered the bar and approached the bartender to ask a question; the two tensed up in fear. Footsteps drew closer to their not-very-good hiding spot and a man sat down, inadvertently kicking Luke in the face.

Old Ben peered beneath the table, looking extremely surprised, “Luke? What in the core are you doing under there?”

Biggs shushed the drunk Hermit, desperately whispering, “Please Mr. Kenobi, Jabba’s goons are after this, you can’t let them know we’re under here.”

“Jabba’s goons?” Ben asked, sounding bewildered, “You mean those ruffians who were standing outside?”

Luke and Biggs nodded frantically. 

“Oh, they left, you don’t have to worry about them.” Ben took a sip of his drink, leaning back with a smile. 

The two boys exchanged a look, “Are you- are you sure? They seemed pretty mad.” Luke asked tentatively.

“Oh, yes. Apparently there was a break-in at one of Jabba’s warehouses and he’s extremely displeased at all of his servants for their failure to prevent it. I imagine whatever small quarrel they had with you will be totally forgotten in the fallout.”

The pair dragged themselves up to the bench across from Kenobi, slouching over in relief. 

“Oh my gods- thank the Krayt! Let’s get out of here, Luke. See, I told you things would blow over.” 

Luke punched Biggs in the shoulder, “Yeah, right. We got lucky, bantha brains.” Luke cleared his throat and addressed Old Ben directly, “Thank you- I don’t know what we would have done if you hadn’t shown up.” 

At the time he had ignored the hair raising on the back of his neck, the surge of foreign mixed emotions, and the strangely familiar smell-that-wasn’t-a-smell he could never quite identify. 

At 17, he was somewhat used to what his Uncle called his ‘damn bleeding heart’ and what Bigs called ‘being weird about other people.' He figured it was kind-of like how deep spacers got twitchy about crowds after spending months with just himself- he spent so much time on the farm that sometimes just being around other people was overwhelming. Plus he was a little drunk at the moment.

Ben cleared his throat, “Oh no, no need to thank me, I’m sure I had nothing to do with it.” 

Biggs rolled his eyes. “...Right. Well, anyway, thanks for letting us know. Come on Luke, let’s beat it!” And they scurried out, not looking back. 

-

Luke hesitantly tells Anakin about the almost-familiar force presence that clung to these memories and Anakin gets frustrated and sad and happy and confused because force why did Obi-Wan have to be so weird about feelings? He appreciates that he was obviously silently protecting his son for 19 years but he seriously couldn’t have talked to him? Luke quietly grieves a man he never really had the chance to know and who he’ll never fully understand while firmly attaching himself to the current Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan: Fucks sake, now they’re both clingy, what did I do to deserve this?

[ruzek-halstead]

there’s one thing on my mind (it’s all for you)

i didn’t have a wip for jatp fanworks appreciation week, so i made one?? but i got too into it and finished it in a few hours. thanks to @ourstarscollided for sending in the incredible prompt that led to this fic!! 

home didn't seem like home anymore for luke patterson, and so he was desperate to find a new place to write music. after an especially brutal fight with his mother, he finds himself in front of l.a. books. he isn't expecting to get much out of it, it was solely a last resort. but then he sees her, julie molina, and he ends up coming back every week just to keep seeing her.

bookstore au

masterlist

If three years ago, someone were to tell Luke, he would actively be spending his Friday night in a small, but cozy book store, he would have laughed in their face.

He was a rockstar. If he wasn't jamming it out at some club with his boys, he was doing something wrong.

But life didn't always work out in his favour, and it wasn't long before he decided he couldn't write out of his home anymore. Home. Sometimes the mere word made him laugh. Home was supposed to be warm, welcoming and loving, and he felt none of those things every time he walked through the front door. It was starting to take a toll on him. Not only on his mental health, but also in his creative abilities. The songs he was writing in his bedroom had taken a dark turn, so dark they felt more like a cry for help than anything else.

So, he decided it was time to find another place to write songs; somewhere that could get his creative juices flowing. When Reggie first suggested this bookstore on the corner of Madison, Luke pinched his brows, not understanding how that was a viable solution. Reggie defended his suggestion by saying bookstores were quiet and he would be surrounded by millions of words of inspiration.

Luke never took Reggie's suggestion until one brutal fight with his mom left him pulling at his hair, desperate to leave the house. He would go anywhere at this point, but his fingers were itching to grab his pencil and book; there was so much he just needed to get out onto paper. If he didn't, he would explode. So, he grabbed his song book, a few pencils and stuffed everything into his backpack before he hopped out his window. At first, he just started walking to nowhere in particular. In the back of his mind, he was intending to drop by Alex's, but instead he found himself standing in front of L.A. Books.

He walked in with the intention of taking one quick walk around and most likely walking right back out. He was pissed off at the world and he didn't think Shakespeare would solve his issue.

But then he saw her.

She was stocking a book shelf, putting up new books as far as he could tell. Her curls kept getting in way of her vision and she was continuously tucking them behind her ears. He could only see the side of her face at this point, but when she was approached by a younger girl to help locate a book, Luke quite literally forgot how to breathe. She was stunning in every which way; her soft smile to the young girl made an unconscious smile spread over his own lips. There was no specific thing about her that drew him to her, but for some reason, he was rooted to the floor. Even when she started moving in his direction, leading the girl to a new section, he couldn't even move just enough to grab a book and look like he wasn't creepily stalking her.

But she only sent him a warm smile as she walked by.

So, maybe Reggie wasn't so wrong about this place after all.

After that, Luke found himself stopping by at least once a week, maybe twice if things at home were really bad. It was a quiet establishment for the most part, and Luke found a corner table that was perfect for his writing. He knew his song writing was starting to take a hit; he knew that. But since he started writing in the bookstore, an obvious shift was clear in the words he scribbled down.

Even the boys noticed.

"What the hell is this?" Alex had demanded one late night after Luke handed him his songbook so he could filter through it. They'd mostly been playing their old originals while Luke worked on some new stuff, and he was finally starting to share.

Luke frowned, biting his lip nervously. "What? Is it that bad?"

"Reg, look at this," Alex ignored Luke, reaching over to show the other brunette. "When were you going to tell us?"

Luke merely blinked, gaze flickering between the two. Reggie, to his credit, looked just as confused, meanwhile Alex was fighting a smirk. "Dude, I'm so confused. What the hell are you talking about?"

Alex placed the book down in his lap, finally letting the smirk take over. "When were you going to tell us you were in love?"

Luke immediately started to sweat. "What?"

"If you're writing these love songs about me, I'm flattered," Alex teased, to which Luke could only roll his eyes and snatch the book back into his possession. "But you know I'm taken."

"I'm not in love," Luke muttered under his breath.

And he wasn't. He would stand by that.

But he'd be lying if he said he didn't stop by the bookstore solely to see his curly-haired goddess. Every time, he would look at her and a sudden burst of inspiration would blindside him and he would be writing into his book without even realizing. He wasn't going to tell the boys that, though.

After about a month of hidden glances and polite smiles, he figured it was about time to say something. He also figured it could only look a little strange, him being at a bookstore every week and never buying anything. To his credit, many others took advantage of their tables to work quietly; he wasn't the only one. But he was the only one who couldn't take his off the employee with kind eyes and a mega-watts smile. Sometimes she came over to organize the tables, or wipe them down, and so Luke decided it was now or never.

"Hi," he blurted one night when she came to grab a stray book someone had left on his table. Her gaze lifted to meet his. Her face broke out into a warm smile and he nearly broke his pencil from how hard he was holding it.

Luke's eyes dropped to her name tag. He'd never been close enough to read it (with the exception of the first time he saw her, but he was understandably starstruck and couldn't focus on anything).

Julie.

He debated saying something else, it almost looked like she was waiting for him too, but the words were caught in his throat. He merely sent her a pained grin as she retreated. God, that was awkward.

Over the next few months, his confidence grew some, but he was never able to hold a full conversation with her. He was working up to it, but in the meantime, he was content in his corner writing songs about the girl who had unknowingly captured his heart.

This week had been particularly gruelling. School had taken a lot out of him (every mark counted for college admissions) and his parents were on his ass about his grades. He knew he had to do well, even if he wanted to pursue music, he needed the grades to get into a good music program; he knew that. He didn't need his mom yelling at him about it every day. So, this Friday he'd spent the entire evening at L.A. Books, anything to just get away for a bit. He knew it was almost closing time; there weren't many customers left and he could see Julie cleaning up out of the corner of his eye.

He was trying not to spend all his time watching Julie, instead focused on his latest creation. So, he didn't see Julie apprehensively watching someone shove a few books into his backpack. He was young, but probably a bit older than Julie. Why he would want to steal some books, Julie had no idea, but it was the wrong day to mess with Julie Molina.

She hadn't had her best week either, and watching someone blatantly try to steal like he was, severely pissed her off. Protocol be damned, Julie stalked over to the individual and blocked his exit. Protocol insisted on not confronting the shop-lifter by any means, but Julie was too annoyed to care.

"Are you going to pay for those books you put in your backpack or can I have them back?"

Julie was impressed with how confident she sounded. Even when he met her glance head-on, she wasn't the least bit intimidated.

"What? Sorry, I think you're thinking of someone else," he replied, but after meeting her gaze the first time, he couldn't hold it as he spoke.

"Just give me the books and I won't call the police," Julie reasoned. She sounded exhausted, and that was because she was; this was honestly the last thing she needed this week, and yet, here she was.

But as soon as the man noticed her change of tone, his mouth twisted into a scowl. "I already told you, you have the wrong guy."

"I saw you put them in your backpack!" Julie argued, her anger crawling back up her throat.

"No, you didn't, because I didn't do anything!" He replied angrily. "Are you going to move, now?"

Julie stood her ground. It was probably quite comical, considering she was a full head shorter than him, but she wasn't moving. "No. Give me back the books."

The man let out a furious snarl. "Get out of my way, bitch."

His words didn't offend her in the slightest. Honestly, she felt sorry for him, that this was how he was raised to treat women, especially someone as young as her. But she was perceptive, and she could tell he was getting agitated and possibly aggressive. She didn't know this guy, she didn't know what he was capable of.

Luke had kept his eye on Julie the entire time, he always did. But as soon as he realized what she was doing, he swore under his breath. He tried to keep his distance, to let her do her thing, but the second the man called Julie a bitch, Luke was up and out of his chair, ready to throw hands.

There was a point in his life where he wouldn't even think about the consequences of his actions, but as he approached, he caught Julie's eyes and figured punching this random guy in the face probably wasn't the best course of action. So, he hung back, close enough to be noticed, but not enough to be considered a threat.

Or so he thought.

The man noticed Julie's eyes focused on something behind him, so he whirled around to see Luke. What with his height and obvious biceps (that were currently on display because what were sleeves anyway?), the man scoffed.

"Is he coming to your rescue or something? Need someone to fight your battles?"

Luke merely raised his eyebrows.

The fact that he was saying all this to a high school girl seriously baffled him.

When the man tried to step around Luke, he side-stepped to be in his way again. Luke didn't smirk, didn't show any facial emotion. It was enough to unnerve him.

With an angry huff, he reached into his backpack to pull out the two books in question. He slammed them into Luke's chest as he stormed past him, muttering, "I don't need this crap."

The moment they heard the door slam closed, Luke's eyes slid over to Julie. Her face was blank, but her eyes were stormy, angry even. He didn't blame her; that guy was a right dick. He hesitantly handed the books back to her. Her gaze flickered to the books and back to him. She probably had no idea how absolutely intimidating she looked.

But then she smiled. A proper, full smile that had Luke merely staring. "Thank you," she said, reaching forward to grab the books. He was hoping she'd say more, but instead she took the books and walked away to put them back in their place.

It was fine, because she had talked to him and he was so ridiculously happy about that. He had also helped her out in that less than stellar situation, but not overbearingly so that he treated her like a damsel in distress who couldn't handle herself. Julie definitely held her own, but he wouldn't be able to live with himself if something happened to her and he was right there sitting in his corner. Pleased with himself and how the situation played out, he skipped back to his seat in the corner, feeling more inspired than ever to finish the current song he was working on.

He glanced up one more time, surprised to catch Julie's sparkling brown eyes already looking at him. She immediately averted her gaze, mouth twitching as she held back a smile.

That was when he decided, no more pining around; it was time to officially ask her out.

What was the worst that could happen? She would say no. And he'd be okay with that, because it was 2021 and respecting women and their decisions shouldn't even be questioned. He'd be disappointed, sure, but for now, he was still holding out hope that maybe she would be into him too.

It was nearing eight, and Luke could tell when he saw the remainder of customers heading for the door. He spotted Julie making her way over too, getting ready to lock the door behind the last customer. He gathered up his things and shoved them into his backpack as slowly as possible. His heart was hammering in his chest and his palms were sweaty; he was actually nervous to ask Julie out.

How couldn't he be? She was absolutely gorgeous.

Luke made it to the door, taking a deep breath before he met her eyes.

Julie stepped in front of him, blocking his exit.

He stumbled in his step, grabbing onto the door frame to keep from toppling straight into her.

"Sorry," she mumbled, tucking a curl behind her ear. For the first time literally ever, Luke observed the tell-tale signs of her shy and apprehensive behaviour. She was always so confident, so in tune with what she seemed to want, this was unusual to him. Not only because of that, but he'd never been this close to her, and he was suddenly finding it extremely hot (and he was barely even wearing a shirt).

Luke tugged on his backpack strap, because he needed to do something. He needed to focus, or else he'd end up doing something stupid, like blurt out that he was in love with her. "No, it's okay. I actually wanted to ask you something anyway."

Her sparkling brown eyes widened for a split second. "Actually, I want to ask you something — are you free to grab a coffee?"

It was safe to say Luke's brain started to short-circuit.

"Uh, what?"

He was so intensely focused on gathering the courage to ask her out, he didn't even know how to reply when she suddenly flipped the plan on him.

He started to lose his mind even more when a soft blush spread over Julie's cheeks. "I'm just closing up, and I could really use a dose of caffeine. I'd really like if you came with me."

Luke can't do more than simply stare at her; his body was failing on him. Julie held his gaze, biting her lip apprehensively with a nervous smile because he wasn't saying anything, and she really hoped she didn't misinterpret his signals. But then he finally fights for control of his body again, and a soft grin spreads onto his lips. "Yeah. I'd really like that."

She matched his grin, closed and locked the door behind her. "I only have a few more things to do. Just a few more minutes."

"No worries," he replied, shoving his hands into his front pockets. "Oh! I'm Luke, by the way."

Julie mulled over the name for a moment. "Julie," she responded.

"I know," he mumbled, eyes solely focused on hers. Even when she looked to him in surprise, he couldn't focus on anything but her eyes. God, she was so gorgeous. "Your name tag," he added, just to ease her fears about him being a stalker (I mean, he was there almost every week...).

Luke leaned against one of the tables as he waited for Julie to finish closing up. He watched her silently, unable to remove the excited smile from his lips the entire time he waited. When she told him he was ready, he diligently held open the door for her and then waited, hands dug into his front pockets, as she locked up behind them.

There was a coffeeshop right around the corner, and as they both started walking in that direction, there was an unspoken agreement, that was where they wanted to go. Luke hated himself and his weirdly awkward nature on their walk over. He couldn't find any words to say to her, none. He chanced a few glances in her direction, but she seemed content with just walking in silence, so he went with the flow.

Once again, he held the door open for her and smiled when looked at him with amused eyes. Julie headed straight for a table near the window, removing her jacket and setting it on the back of her chair. Luke followed, lingering when she didn't sit back down.

"I can go order," he offered, "What would you like?"

Julie looked up at him with a smirk, and dear God, his knees nearly buckled. "I invited you. It's my treat."

"Oh, come on," he nearly whined. "Let's not do this, please."

Julie pursed her lips. She was a very determined person, and if he didn't know that yet, he'd be quick to learn. "I invited you. It's only fair."

He ran a hand through his hair, shooting her the most charming smile he could manage. "Julie, I've been waiting to take you out for months. Please let me buy you a coffee."

All her determination died there and then on the tip of her tongue.

"Okay," she replied with a cheeky smile. She diligently took a seat. "I'll take an iced coffee, please."

Luke nodded, once again, skipping away from her for the second time that night. He ordered Julie an iced coffee (and a cookie because who doesn't like cookies) and a regular coffee for himself. He was already jittery enough but he could never say no to coffee.

"Here you go." He said softly, placing her treats in front of her.

Julie took a quick sip of her coffee and narrowed her gaze on Luke. "I want to hear more. You said you've been waiting to take me out for months."

Luke had never felt him blush so quickly before in his life. He nearly choked on the coffee he was currently drinking. "It sounds really creepy when you say it like that."

"I know you've been coming to the shop for months," she continued, breaking apart her cookie. She wasn't looking at him, and it honestly made Luke all the more nervous. She made him nervous. "And you've never bought anything, but you're always writing in a book."

"I needed a quiet place to write music and I found your shop."

Julie nodded along, humming. "I catch you looking at me a lot."

Luke scratched the back of his head. "Well, honestly, that's not entirely my fault. I can't help but stare at beautiful things."

Julie looked up at him with a smirk. "That was smooth. I feel like it's only fair I be as honest." She leaned her elbows onto the table, leaning in close. Luke started sweating again. "I always look for you during my shifts."

It was as if the air was entirely knocked out of his lungs. It was the reassurance he was looking for, the acknowledgement that his feelings weren't one-sided, but it was a lot to take in at once.

"You're the reason I come back every week," he admitted, the words flowing freely out of him now that he knew with certainty she felt something for him too.

Julie leaned back in her chair. Her eyes tracked his movements, mostly because she didn't know what to say next. Where do they go from here?

Who makes the next move?

"I'll keep dropping by. But under one condition," Luke reasoned, hiding his smirk with his coffee mug.

Julie found herself leaning in again. There was something about him that was so alluring, always drawing her in for more. "What's that?" She didn't want to give her real answer: anything.

"I'll keep coming by if you give me your number," he told her, running his finger around the rim of his mug. "Maybe go on another date with me?"

Julie didn't reply at first; she kept him waiting until he looked at her with curious eyes. She kept him on the hook, just enough that for a moment, he wavered in his confidence. "I'd love to give you my number."

He let out an obvious sigh of relief. Julie was definitely going to wreck him in the most beautiful of ways.

"And that date?"

Julie clicked her tongue, monitoring the way his eyes absentmindedly dropped to her lips. "I'll decide that after you walk me home. But your chances are looking pretty good."

A delicious smirk crawled over Luke's mouth, and now it was all Julie could focus on.

"Then I guess I should up my game," he winked, shrugging as he added, "Just in case."

When Luke walked Julie home hours later, she confidently latched onto his hand, mostly just to give him an ego boost because he acted like the perfect gentleman all night. And when he lingered at the door, unsure whether it was too soon to kiss her or not, she leaned up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss dangerously close to the corner of his lips.

"How's next Friday night?"

It took Luke a moment to form the words after that, but he was anxiously waiting for her response.

"I'm off at eight, you know where I'll be." Even with all the coy flirting, she couldn't help but shoot him an excited grin.

Luke stuffed his hands back into his front pockets and started retreating down her walkway. "I'll, uh — I'll text you."

Julie leaned against the front door. "I'll be waiting."

And somehow, after months of pining on both ends, all it took was one attempted theft to bring Luke and Julie together.

It would take a lot more than that to separate them now.

x

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[toohardtoforgetcth]

Too Hard To Forget

Chapter Two

Warnings: Swearing, angst, the usual 

4,570 words

A/N: I’ve been waiting to post chapter two of this fic until I got some interest in the first bit so here it is! Feedback is so so appreciated since this is the first piece of writing I’ve ever published and I’d love to know what you think!

It had been twelve days since Parker’s awkward exchange with Calum at the record store, and eight days since he had put the fear of God into her outside Grace’s room. She was surprised to discover he hadn’t been in to visit Grace in four days. In the short time she’d known him, she’d come to realize that it was unlike him to go more than a day or two without visiting.

Despite being downright terrified of him, Parker felt drawn to Calum. Every time he knocked her down, she found herself wanting to come running back for more. Parker’s curiosity got the best of her, and she couldn’t stop herself from asking Grace where he’d been.

“Everything okay with your grandson—Calum, right? Haven’t seen him all week,” she asked nonchalantly, but the old woman saw right through her.

She smiled a knowing smile, making Parker blush. “I told you he wasn’t so bad, didn’t I?” she winked.

Parker made a face. She would never say so, but she had to disagree with her on that one. She wondered if Grace really knew the effect her grandson had on people.

“Anyhow, he’s been so busy with work. Poor boy. It’s a terrible job. He could do so much better, he just doesn’t know it.”

Parker pondered this for a moment. Hating his job would explain why he was so moody all the time—she couldn’t imagine having to wake up every morning and work your life away at a place that made you miserable. “If anyone can convince him, it’s you, Grace,” Parker smiled.

» » » » » »

Friday afternoon, Parker still hadn’t seen Calum. She had been hopeful every time the front door opened and disappointed to discover it wasn’t him. She wasn’t sure why she felt that way—Calum scared her, and she should really learn to just let it go. Maybe there was a part of her—a competitive part—that wanted to win his friendship, simply because his cold demeanor made him a kind of challenge.

Calum wasn’t a nice guy—that much was obvious. He had given Parker plenty of reasons to want to stay away from him. He was clearly not interested in her—as friends or otherwise. In fact, he had been nothing but hostile towards her since their first meeting. But still, she couldn’t stop thinking about the man with the chocolate brown eyes. She daydreamed about those eyes, his muscled frame, soft brown curls. He was alluring, and Parker wondered what he was really like, under all the black and tattoos and leather, wondered if he had a soft side that anyone besides Grace was ever privileged enough to see.

• • • • • •

Calum was sick and fucking tired of Tom’s bullshit. He was this fucking close to quitting today and telling him to go fuck himself when he got a call from Gram. No matter what kind of shit Calum got himself into, Gram was always there when he needed her most, saving him when he didn’t even know he needed saving.

“Hi dear,” her shaky voice sounded from the other end.

Calum sighed deeply. He missed her voice. He missed her. He felt like shit for not going to see her, but he’d just been feeling so inexplicably angry and irritable the past week, and honestly, it was draining him. He knew he should visit, wanted to, but Calum couldn’t hide anything from Gram and he didn’t want her to worry. And he had to admit that subconsciously, he’d been avoiding Parker. Calum thought maybe some distance from her would keep his mind from wandering back to her, but so far he had been unsuccessful. He had a pretty good idea why he had been so bitter lately, and it was because of a pretty blonde with grey eyes. Parker was throwing him off—he’d never spent more than one night thinking about the same girl—and he didn’t like it.

“Hi, pretty lady,” he breathed, relaxing a little.

“Everything alright, honey? I haven’t seen you all week,” she sounded sad. It broke Calum’s heart. You piece of shit, he thought to himself. She doesn’t deserve this.

“I know,” he exhaled. “I’m sorry, Gram,” he said sincerely. “I don’t have a good reason. I gotta get back to work, but I’ll come see you tomorrow, okay? I promise.”

• • • • • •

Parker was coming back from her lunch break when she noticed Calum emerging from the double doors of the lobby. Her heart skipped a beat when she locked eyes with him. His dark eyes bore into hers, leaving her feeling strangely exposed. He said nothing, looking away from her as he put a cigarette between his lips, stopping to light it as the door shut behind him.

She hadn’t seen him since he lashed out at her for listening at Grace’s door, but apparently Parker had a death wish.

“Hey,” she greeted quietly with a small smile as she approached the door, more out of politeness than to spark conversation. She knew he wouldn’t stop to chat with her, but Parker wasn’t going to ignore his existence, the way he did with her. Hopefully he didn’t rip her head off for trying to be polite.

Calum caught her by surprise when he responded.

“Hey.”

Progress, Parker thought. A definite improvement from the complete silence or burning hostility that he usually greeted her with. Taking advantage of his sudden mood change, Parker stopped in front of Calum. He watched her with curious eyes, taking a drag from his cigarette and blowing a cloud of smoke to the side.

“Haven’t seen you in a while,” she observed casually.

“Been busy,” he replied with a shrug.

God, he made it so difficult to have a normal conversation, but Parker was determined to change his falsely skewed opinion of her.

“Grace has been missing you. She talks about you all the time,” Parker commented, heart picking up as she noticed his eyebrows drawing together and his shoulders tense. Shit, wrong thing to say. Fuck, here we go again.

“Like I said, I’ve been busy,” he pushed off the wall, standing to his full height and looking down at Parker. “Doesn’t really concern you, anyway, does it?” he spat bitterly as he flicked his half-smoked cigarette to the pavement, stalking away.

Parker stared after him, wishing she had kept her mouth shut. What was his problem?

• • • • • •

Later that afternoon, Jenna sat cross-legged on Parker’s bed, painting her nails. Parker lay on her back, Loki curled up between her legs.

“What’s got you all moody today?” Jenna pressed, recognizing the face Parker usually made when she was overthinking.

“Ugh,” she groaned, flipping over onto her stomach. Loki let out a displeased meow at being disrupted, launching off the bed. “Stupid Calum,” Parker rolled her eyes in frustration.

“Ooh, hottie grandma’s boy? Elaborate, please,” Jenna gushed, scooting closer.

“I ran into him at work today. I haven’t seen him all week, and then he showed up out of the blue. He actually said hi to me, so I tried to make conversation since that’s the most he’s said to me, like, ever.” Parker sat up, facing Jenna. “And then he just—snapped at me. I don’t know what I did—why he hates me so much,” she flopped back down on the bed, blowing out a sigh.

Jenna giggled. “Not everyone is going to like you, babe. That’s life. Anyway, he sounds like a total d-bag. Why do you even care what he thinks?”

“I don’t know,” Parker admitted. “He just seems—different. I can’t help but feel like there’s this whole other side to him and I don’t know why but I feel this, like, need to get to know him. He is a d-bag,” she laughed, “but I can’t stop thinking about him.”

“Sounds like you need a distraction,” Jenna’s face twisted into a sly grin. “We’re going out tonight.”

• • • • • •

Calum was sitting comfortably on his couch, trying to unwind with a beer and a bad movie after a particularly shitty ending to an otherwise great visit with Gram. He had been avoiding Parker, and after a week of not seeing her, he felt the unwelcome feeling of butterflies in his stomach the second he laid eyes on her. It was a sensation he was wildly unfamiliar with but had grown accustomed to feeling whenever she was around.

And then she had to open her mouth and ruin everything. This girl really knew how to get him going.

To be fair, she hadn’t really said anything wrong. Her comment only pissed Calum off because he had already been feeling guilty for blowing off his visits with Gram and he was mad at himself. His response was harsh—he could tell it hurt her. He wished he didn’t care, but he did. As much as he hated to admit it, Calum was intrigued by Parker, and it was unsettling. He didn’t like feeling captivated by her—it made him feel vulnerable and Calum was not vulnerable. Parker made him feel like he had no control, and he hated it. He was trying and failing to come up with a way to get this girl out of his head when his three best friends burst through the door of his apartment unannounced.

“Put a shirt on, we’re hitting the town tonight,” his friend Michael shouted enthusiastically, heading straight into the kitchen and rooting through Calum’s fridge for a beer. He pulled out three, handing one to Ashton and Luke before opening his own.

Besides Gram, Calum loved only three people in this world; Michael, Ashton and Luke. The four of them had been best friends since high school, and they loved Calum unconditionally, despite his harsh tendencies and his troubled past.

“Boys, I’m relaxing,” Calum stretched his long legs out on the coffee table. “I’m not in the mood for your drunken misadventures tonight.”

Luke launched himself onto the couch, head landing in Calum’s lap. “Too bad, babycakes, we’re going out. So get up, get dressed, get pretty. You got ten minutes.” Luke reached up and pinched his cheek affectionately, taking a long swig of his beer.

Calum rolled his eyes at the tall blonde with the bright blue eyes, but he couldn’t help the grin that graced his lips. He’d been thinking about Parker all day, and truthfully, he could use a night out with his boys.

• • • • • •

Parker was feeling good, having downed several drinks since arriving at the bar with Jenna and a few of her other friends, but she was getting tired of dancing. Deciding she needed a break, she and Jenna wove their way through the crowd of tightly packed bodies before reaching the bar. She ordered a vodka and cranberry for Jenna and a beer for herself. She was sliding her cash across the bar top when she felt Jenna’s hand close around her forearm.

“Oh, my god,” she leaned in. “You’ll never guess who’s here.”

Parker followed her friends’ gaze to the other end of the bar, where Calum was leaning against a pillar, talking with three other ridiculously attractive men. Parker groaned. She came out tonight to think of things other than Calum, and there he was, in all his glory, demanding her attention.

“Why are they all so hot?!” Jenna gaped.

As if on cue, Calum turned his head in their direction, his dark eyes meeting Parker’s. His face fell, clearly not impressed upon seeing her here. She looked away immediately, flushing.

“Oh, Jesus. He saw me staring. Kill me now.”

“Oh, stop being so dramatic,” Jenna brushed her off with a wave of her hand. “Come on, let’s go back.”

She grabbed Parker’s wrist, dragging her back to the dance floor. Parker threw a subtle glance over her shoulder, where she caught Calum’s eye again. He was still watching her, not a trace of a smile on his lips.

• • • • • •

Calum stood by the bar, unmoving from his spot by the pillar. He’d been nursing a beer for the last hour, no longer in the mood to get drunk. His focus was on the blonde dancing with her friends, hips swaying and body moving in all the right ways. He hadn’t expected Parker to be here tonight, and it killed his vibe. The very thing he had come here to distract himself from was dancing fifty feet from where he stood, and he couldn’t tear his thoughts—or his eyes—away.

Calum was nothing if not experienced when it came to women. He had an attitude and a hard edge that women just seemed drawn to. He would never understand the obsession they had with the bad boy type, but he wasn’t complaining. Calum was not a relationship guy. He had two rules—never stay the night, never bring them home. Their place, quick and dirty, then disappear when they fell asleep—that’s how Calum liked it. He liked to be in control. That’s why Parker unnerved him—he’d never been drawn to anyone the way he was to her. She fascinated him in a way he didn’t understand. He’d been watching her all night, and he was starting to get irritated. He needed something else to occupy his racing thoughts.

“You got your eye on that pretty blonde one, don’t you, pal?” Ashton nudged him, snapping him out of his reverie.

“What?” Calum shook his head as if to shake the image of her out of his mind. “No. I just—I know her.”

“Bullshit. I know that look,” Ashton mused.

Calum scoffed. “I don’t have a look.”

Ashton was the oldest of the four of them, and he knew them better than anyone. There wasn’t a thing he could hide from any of his boys, least of all Ashton.

Ashton’s expression turned sympathetic. “Cal, you can’t tell me you don’t get lonely. All you do is work, and Gram is the only girl you spend more than a day with. Don’t you think it’s time to try sticking with one girl, maybe?”

“Fuck off, mate. It’s none of your business,” Calum snapped.

Ashton’s expression softened. “I’m just worried about you, man. We all are.”

Calum pushed off from the pillar, annoyed. He knew Ashton meant well—it was obvious how much he cared for his boys. Like brothers. He was the glue that kept them all together. He was wise for his age, and he was the one they went to when they needed advice. But Calum wasn’t in the mood for his profound bullshit tonight. He needed a smoke.

Calum pushed through the throngs of people in the bar, earning glares from a few of them as he shoved them out of his way. He felt himself calm down almost immediately once he opened the heavy metal door at the back of the bar, the cool air hitting his face. He stepped out onto the deserted patio, pulling a cigarette from the pack in his pocket. He lit it and closed his eyes, leaning back against the brick wall. He let the smoke burn his lungs, but it didn’t clear the fog in his brain like he had hoped it would.

Calum considered what Ashton said to him inside. He was pissed off at Ash for calling him out, but he had a point, though Calum would never admit it. He couldn’t explain why he didn’t want to settle down. It wasn’t that he didn’t like the girls he slept with, it’s just that he couldn’t see himself doing ordinary things with any of them. They were all just nameless faces, there to satisfy a need and that was it. He couldn’t picture himself waking up and making breakfast, staying up late watching movies, grocery shopping, with any of them. The only person he daydreamed about doing those things with was Parker. And that scared the living shit out of him.

Maybe his problem was that Calum didn’t know how to be someone’s boyfriend. He hadn’t grown up with parents, his grandfather died when he was only eight, and Gram never remarried. Calum was good at being alone. He wasn’t happy, but it was all he had ever known. The only girl he ever had somewhat of a relationship with—if you could even call it that—was Kendra, his first year out of high school. The rest of the boys went off to college while he stayed back and worked, and they dated for all of a month until she started sleeping around on him. He never loved her, but after that he decided that would be the first and only time he let himself care about someone.

When he finished his cigarette, he stubbed it out under his boot and headed back inside. He ordered himself another drink, returning to where he left the boys. Parker was still dancing, and Calum used all the strength he had in his body to force himself not to look at her.

A dozen feet away, he locked eyes with a cute brunette in a tight dress, leaving very little to the imagination. She flashed him a sexy smile, raising her drink to him.

Yeah, that’s exactly what he needed right now. A distraction in a tight dress.

He returned her smile with a lazy one of his own, which she took as an invitation to approach him. Good. Calum liked it better when he didn’t have to do all the work.

“Can I buy you a drink, handsome?” she asked in a sultry voice.

“Depends. You gonna take me home?”

• • • • • •

Parker took a break around midnight, her feet aching and her mouth dry from the alcohol. Walking past the bar to the bathroom, she caught sight of Calum sitting on a stool, a beautiful girl with long, dark hair standing between his legs. He was smiling, his hands on her hips, and Parker felt a pang of jealousy hit her in the chest. You have nothing to be jealous of, she scolded herself. He’s an asshole—why do you like him? In that moment, Parker realized that she most certainly had feelings for Calum, even if she didn’t really know anything about him. Even though she was confused about what those feelings were, she knew she didn’t like seeing him with another girl. Parker changed her mind about taking a break. Seeing Calum with someone made her want to down several shots and forget he existed.

• • • • • •

Half an hour later, Calum said his goodbyes to the boys, leaving the bar with his arm slung around the shoulders of the brunette. As they passed the dance floor, he scanned the crowd for Parker. Calum spotted her in the same place she had been earlier, only this time she looked up and their eyes locked. He flashed her a cocky smile and winked, feeling equal parts satisfied and guilty at the expression that crossed her features.

He’d have to be blind not to see that look. It was written there, plain as day, on her face. She was hurt.

• • • • • •

Calum untucked himself from the grip of the sleeping brunette, slipping out of the bed that wasn’t his own. He didn’t even remember her name. She was pretty, but Calum hadn’t really been in the mood tonight. Something didn’t feel right, and a nagging voice in the back of his head told him it was because of a certain grey-eyed girl. He found his clothes on the floor, quickly dressing and shrugging on his leather jacket before finding his boots. He tugged them on as he shut the door silently behind him, leaving the girl with nothing but his first name and a night she wouldn’t forget.

Calum couldn’t say the same.

Calum stepped outside, thankful for the fresh air—the girl’s apartment was stuffy as hell. She didn’t live too far, taking Calum only 20 minutes to make it back to his apartment on foot. Enough time to have a smoke and clear his head. Despite the smoke burning his lungs, he was unable to erase the image of Parker’s face when he left the bar. Why had he taunted her, on purpose? What reason did he have to want to hurt her? When Calum finally settled in his own bed, he found himself wishing he never went out tonight.

» » » » » »

Parker spent most of Sunday morning being lazy in bed, hiding under the covers until the early afternoon, moving from her bed only to be lazy on the couch instead. She was having a great night dancing with her friends and letting loose until a certain moody, tattooed brunette ruined her night by going home with another girl. She wished that it was her going home with Calum, and that thought disturbed her. He was an asshole and Parker knew nothing good could come of her feelings for him, but she couldn’t stop thinking about him. She had left the bar shortly after he did, her good mood spoiled when she thought about what he was doing.

» » » » » »

Parker awoke on Monday in a foul mood. She spent Sunday sad and stewing over Calum and how she’d never have him, but today she felt downright angry. Calum was a jerk and he was trying to hurt her, and for what reason? She deserved far better. Her sour mood only got worse when she arrived at work and spotted Calum in the hallway. He had his usual scowl on his face and he ignored her as he passed by, yet again.

Normally, she’d let it go and pretend not to let it bother her. Normally, she was a people-pleaser and hated confrontation.

Not today.

No, today there was no holding back. She was going to give him a piece of her mind.

She whirled around as Calum walked in the opposite direction, away from her.

“What is your problem with me? Did I do something to offend you, or are you just an asshole all the time?” she demanded.

Calum stopped, slowly turning around to face her.

“Excuse me?” he replied dangerously, taking a step towards her.

“Since the first time we met, you’ve acted like a complete jackass. Every time I see you, you either ignore me entirely or you try and scare me with that stupid badass attitude,” she paused. When he said nothing, she huffed in annoyance. “Get over yourself, pal. We all go through shit, there’s no need to be a dick about it.”

Parker was surprised at herself for her outburst, which was completely out of character for her. But Calum had pissed her off one too many times—he wasn’t getting away with it again. She placed a hand on her hip, eyebrows raised, waiting for an explanation.

The cocky smirk he wore turned into a menacing glare. He took two more steps towards her, their toes touching. He was so close that she could feel his breath on her face. He smelled incredible, like the woods, and spice, with a hint of smoke. Stop it, dumbass. You shouldn’t be thinking about how good he smells right now. His tall frame forced her to tilt her head back to look at him. His dark eyes glittered, but not in a kind way. He grasped her chin between his thumb and forefinger. “Watch your mouth, doll,” he said threateningly.

Parker’s spine chilled, goosebumps raising along her arms and the back of her neck. His use of a pet name gave her butterflies, but she knew he didn’t mean it in an adoring way. Calum frightened her—this she already knew. But confronting him was clearly a bad idea, one she hadn’t thought through—she was stupid for getting on his bad side. It was obvious he wasn’t one to be messed with, and he definitely didn’t have any qualms about voicing his opinion.

The rest of her workday she spent thinking about their confrontation. The unsettling feeling Calum’s presence gave her weighed heavily in the pit of her stomach. She didn’t know whether her feelings towards him were attraction, fear, or a dangerous mix of both.

• • • • • •

This girl was going to be the death of him. Calum had been stunned when Parker called him out this morning. He hadn’t expected it from her, of all people. She was usually so bright and cheery, going out of her way to be nice to him even when he lashed out at her. And even though her words made him angry, all he could think about was putting that mouth of hers to good use. Calum didn’t know how much longer he was going to be able to keep this up. The more she pissed him off, the stronger the pull was to her. It was beginning to become difficult to deny that he felt things for Parker.

» » » » » »

Parker and Jenna were dancing the night away at a club downtown on Thursday night, much needed after working overtime hours this week. She had had one too many drinks, her head fuzzy and spinning. She had Friday off, and she was looking forward to nursing her hangover on the couch, curled up with her cat and watching Netflix. Parker excused herself to use the bathroom. She splashed cold water on her face in an attempt to sober herself up a bit, and when she returned, Jenna was wrapped in the arms of a guy that was exactly Jenna’s type. It was getting late, and Parker was drunk; she wanted to go home.

“Hey, I’m gonna head home. You coming?”

“I think I might stay,” she said, obviously distracted by the handsome blonde dancing in front of her. She turned to Parker. “Unless you want me to come. Do you need me to come with you?” she asked.

Parker appreciated Jenna’s offer, but she knew she didn’t want to go. “No, you stay. I’ll call you tomorrow.” Parker turned to make her way off the dance floor. “Be good,” she added with a smug smile.

• • • • • •

Parker sat on the curb outside waiting for her cab. She should probably have waited inside the bar, but she had hoped the fresh air would sober her up a bit. Her head was still spinning, and she could hardly keep her eyes open. It had been at least fifteen minutes and she was beginning to get tired of waiting. She could probably have walked halfway home by now, so she stood on shaky legs and headed in the direction of her apartment. She silently thanked her sober self for picking sneakers over heels. It was a warm night, typical of August, but she pulled her denim jacket on anyway, not wanting to have to carry it.

Walking through a particularly sketchy area of downtown, Parker got an uneasy feeling in her gut that she was being followed. She chanced a quick glance over her shoulder, and her heart started pounding when she realized her suspicions were right. There were two men walking behind her, picking up their pace as she attempted to pick up her own, but her legs were still wobbly from the alcohol buzzing in her veins. She should have stayed and waited for the stupid cab.

“What’s your hurry, sweetheart?” one of the men called out from behind her, his gravelly voice sending a shiver down her spine.

“Where’re you off to? We can take you home, honey,” the other one drawled, turning Parker’s stomach.

Parker all but broke into a run, desperate to make it onto the nearest busy street before they caught up to her. She could hear their footsteps closing in when a black 1970 Charger screeched to a halt at the curb. Parker stopped dead, panic setting in. Her instinct was to run, but her feet were frozen in fear. A hooded figure emerged from the car, slamming the door behind him. This is it, Parker thought. She prepared herself to fight back, but the three against one odds were not in her favour. The streetlights illuminated his face as the stranger approached her and Parker’s chest flooded with relief when she recognized those familiar brown eyes.

Calum.

On second thought, Parker wasn’t sure why she felt relieved to see Calum. She wasn’t sure if she was more afraid of him, or the two men following her. At least, she didn’t think Calum would hurt her. Would he?

“What the hell are you doing, walking around this neighbourhood at night by yourself?” he demanded, pushing his hood back.

“I—” she started, but Parker had to admit she didn’t have a good reason. It had been stupid to leave the club alone. She should have waited inside for the cab. “I don’t know,” she confessed sheepishly. “I wasn’t thinking.”

“No shit,” he muttered, rolling his eyes. He turned back to the car. “Get in,” he commanded.

Parker looked behind her, but the two men were gone. She was relieved they had seemingly given up when they realized she wasn’t alone, but her heart was still pounding. Whether it was from her close call with them or being close to Calum, she didn’t know. She followed Calum to the car and opened the passenger door. The smell of leather and spice enveloped her when she sat down, and it was oddly comforting.

“What were you doing out there alone?” he repeated once they were in the car.

“I was out with my friend Jenna. I wanted to leave, but she didn’t, so I called a cab—but it never came so I just started walking,” she explained.

“You should know better,” Calum berated, irritated. “Where’s your place?” he asked shortly.

Parker told him her address. She briefly wondered if it was a good idea, him knowing where she lived, but it was too late now. He did just rescue me, she thought. If he wanted to hurt me, he would have left me alone in the street.

She leaned her head back against the headrest, closing her eyes as her drunken state overpowered her ability to stay awake.

Calum pulled the Charger onto Parker’s street and glanced sideways at the blonde passed out in his passenger seat.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” he muttered. He got out of the car, opening her door and scooping her easily into his arms. She didn’t stir, but he could feel her breath against the bare skin on his neck. It tickled his skin, giving him goosebumps. She smelled like alcohol, and there was a faint trace of a flowery perfume. He carried Parker up the stairs of the front porch, using her key to unlock the door and stepping inside. He was greeted by a little grey cat meowing at his feet. He followed Calum through the house as he fumbled his way in the dark in search of Parker’s bedroom. He took a guess when he found the only room with a bed, setting her gently down and pulling the duvet over her.

Calum lingered in the doorway for a moment, his eyes scanning over her face, staring at her parted lips and then glancing at the cat that had curled up in a ball on the pillow next to her. She looked peaceful, and she was really kind of beautiful when she wasn’t running her mouth.

He let himself out, locking the door behind him and dropping into his Charger.

What the fuck are you doing, Cal, he thought to himself. He started the engine and peeled away from the curb. He drove for a while, no specific destination in mind, when he found himself parked outside of Ashton’s house. Subconsciously, he must have known he needed to talk things out with someone.

• • • • • •

He knocked sharply on the door, waiting impatiently. A few moments later, a tired-looking Ashton opened it, shirtless and in blue basketball shorts, his black hair in disarray from recent sleep.

“Cal?” he mumbled groggily. “What’s wrong?”

Calum pushed past him, walking to the kitchen to get himself a drink.

“It’s the middle of the night, man,” Ashton groaned. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you.”

Ashton sighed in defeat, sinking down onto one of the barstools in his kitchen. Calum leaned against the island, downing his drink in one swallow.

“You were right. The other night, at the bar. The girl I was staring at.”

Ashton remained quiet, prompting him to continue. He couldn’t fathom why this couldn’t wait until the morning, but he didn’t tell Calum that.

“I think I have feelings for her. And I don’t know what the fuck to do about it. She drives me insane and she gets me so riled up that I lash out at her every time I see her, but when she’s not around, I can’t stop thinking about her. What the fuck is wrong with me?”

Ashton sighed, raking his hand through his messy hair. “Cut yourself some slack, Cal—this is new territory for you. There’s nothing wrong with you,” Ashton assured him.

“So why do I feel angry? Why do I keep trying to hurt her?”

“Maybe you’re just scared,” Ashton shrugged. “Opening up to someone puts you in a vulnerable position, and you don’t like losing control. You’re pushing her away ‘cause that’s all you’ve ever done, and maybe you’re angry because she’s making you feel unsteady.”

“Then how do I stop?” Calum questioned, feeling a little hopeless. Parker was kind, and gentle, and good, and Calum was none of those things—he didn’t deserve her. She was afraid of him—there was no way she was going to let her guard down around him after the way he’d treated her.

“You just have to let her in, man. You’ll never get a handle on your feelings if you don’t allow yourself to feel.”

» » » » » »

On Friday morning, Parker awoke with a hangover from hell. Her head felt like it had been split open, and her stomach was churning violently. She sat up, slowly, and noticed she was still in her clothes from the bar, minus her shoes. It was unlike her to collapse into bed without changing first. She checked her phone, several missed calls and texts from Jenna to make sure she got home safely. Then, the memories came flooding back to her. Calum brought her here. He must have tucked her into bed. He hates me—why would he do that? For the life of her, Parker could not figure him out.

taglist: @treatallwithkindness

[malecsecretsanta]

Merry Christmas, bloodspeckledraphael!

For @bloodspeckledraphael. Hi! You mentioned coffee shop AUs, lots of Malec firsts, and tattooed!alec, so hopefully you'll like this :) Happy holidays!

Read On AO3 

*****

Tattooed Romance

“Make sure you keep that dry for the next week,” Alec said. “It’s going to be fifty dollars.” 

The woman passed her credit card across the counter, and Alec slid it into the machine. The woman’s upped arm was covered in a clear layer of plastic, and Alec could just see the heart design underneath it. 

“Thanks,” the woman said, taking her card and receipt. 

“Have a nice day.” Alec smiled and followed the woman to the door. He switched the light-up sign in the window to Closed, and locked up after her. 

“Last one?” Izzy poked her head out of the tattoo parlor’s back room. Her long black hair was up in a high ponytail, and her tank top showed off the sleeves of tattoos that covered both of her arms. 

“Yeah.” Alec followed his sister into the back of the shop, separated from the main area by a curtain. The back was a cluttered mess of boxes of supplies surrounding a rickety wooden table with four chairs around it, and a single tattoo station shoved off to the side. Max was perched on one of the chairs, watching Jace put the finishing touches on a heron tattoo on his right arm. Max was counting the days until he was old enough for his first tattoo. 

“Alright,” Alec said. “Max, it’s past your bedtime.” 

Alec’s youngest brother tipped his head back and pouted. “Please? I want to watch Jace finish!” 

“Already done, buddy.” Jace held up his arm, showing off the design. “Let me wrap this up,” he added. “I’ll be right there.”

“Thanks.” Alec took Max’s hand and led him up the stairs at the back of the room, Izzy close behind. 

“I’ve been thinking,” Izzy said. “We should get a break.”

Alec didn’t respond. If he took a break, they wouldn’t be able to pay rent next month.

“Alec,” Izzy said. “We can close early for one night. There’s a band playing at that coffee shop where Simon works—”

“Jace likes that coffee place because he has a crush on Simon’s friend,” Alec said. “He doesn’t go for the coffee.”

“I know. But it’s not like we’d have to pay for tickets.” 

“And what about Max?” Alec asked. “Who’s taking care of him?”

“Max can stay on his own for a few hours,” Izzy said. Alec frowned, and she backtracked. “I mean, I can ask Aline.”  

Alec considered, then nodded.

“Yes!” Izzy pumped her fist in the air. “I’ll text her now.” She jogged past Alec to the door at the top of the stairs, already fishing her old phone from the back pocket of her jeans. Alec followed her into the apartment. 

The Lightwood siblings lived in the rooms above their tattoo parlor, to avoid having to pay rent on two buildings. The front room was taken up by the kitchenette, another wooden table with four more mismatched chairs, and the single dark green sofa pushed up against the back wall. There was a tiny bathroom that they all had to share, and two bedrooms, each with a twin bed against each wall and a dresser in the middle. 

Izzy had already disappeared into the bathroom. Alec crossed the main room to the bedroom he shared with Jace, closed the door behind himself, and sat down on his cheap mattress. The springs groaned under his weight. 

Alec stared at himself in the cracked mirror over the dresser. He could see the shadows under his eyes from across the room.

Maybe Isabelle was right. Maybe he could use a break. 

o-o-o-o-o

“What can I get for you?” Magnus leaned across the counter and smiled at the next customer.

They didn’t look up from their phone. “Um, iced coffee, please. And a slice of pumpkin bread.”

“That will be…” Magnus glanced down at the till. “Eight dollars, fifty-seven cents. Can I get a name for your order?”

The customer paid in cash. Magnus put the money away and scribbled the order on the side of an empty cup. 

“Hurry up,” Clary called. “Let’s get these people out of here so we can close.” 

Magnus handed her the cup. “Calm down, biscuit. This is the last one.”

Clary wrinkled her nose at him and turned to make the drink. On Magnus’s other side, Simon finished wiping down the last blender and yanked his apron off over his head. Magnus caught a glimpse of the logo on the front, the howling wolf’s head over the words The Gray Wolf, before Simon tossed it onto the counter. 

“Done,” he announced. “No thanks to either of you.”

Clary shoved a few loose strands of hair away from her face. “I helped.” 

“No, you didn’t,” Simon said. “Come on. Let’s close up. I’ve got D&D in an hour.”

“Why do you play at half past ten?” Magnus asked. Simon shrugged. 

“Why not? I’ll see you guys tomorrow.” Simon ducked into the back room to grab his stuff. A moment later, Magnus heard the back door slam shut. 

“You’ll be here tomorrow, right?” Clary asked. “I know it’s normally your day off, but—”

“I already told Simon I’d cover for him while he plays,” Magnus said. “Besides, I want to hear this band.”

“No,” Clary said. “You really don’t. The only person who wants to hear this band is Simon’s girlfriend, and I think even she’s going to be disappointed. Don’t tell him I said that.”

o-o-o-o-o

Alec stood outside the door, waiting for his brother to finish in the bathroom. The front door swung open, and Isabelle stepped into the apartment. She wore a red top with black leggings and combat boots, and her hair was tied back in a high ponytail. 

“Is he still in there?” she demanded. “We’re going to be late!”

“I’m done!” Jace stepped out of the bathroom. “Does my hair look okay?”

“You look fine.” Izzy glanced at Alec’s outfit—plain jeans and a sweater with only one hole in it. “You’re not wearing that, are you?”

“What’s wrong with this sweater?”

“Everything, brother dear,” Izzy said. “We’re going to be late.”

“Max is at Aline’s?” Alec asked. Izzy rolled her eyes. 

“No. I left him alone in a back alley to get kidnapped. Yeah, Aline and Helen are watching him.”

“Okay, then.” Alec grabbed his wallet off the kitchen table and tucked it into his back pocket. “Let’s go.”

o-o-o-o-o

Magnus handed a carboard tray with six iced coffees across the counter to the next customer in line. “Enjoy,” he said, and they smiled and dropped a five in the tip jar.

“Hey, Magnus,” Clary said, poking her head out of the back room. “You’ve got this, right? I want to watch.”

“Have fun,” Magnus said. Clary smiled and disappeared. 

The Gray Wolf was packed. Simon’s band was setting up on the small stage, helped by Clary’s mom and stepfather. Magnus moved back to the till, ready to take the next customer’s order.

The front door to the shop swung open, setting the small bell ringing. Magnus looked up.

Three people stepped into the shop. The black-haired girl, who Magnus vaguely recognized as Simon’s girlfriend Isabelle, and the blond boy peeled off immediately to find seats, while their friend crossed the shop to the counter. 

“Hi,” he said. “Um. Can I get a dragon fruit refresher and two small coffees?”

Magnus forced himself to look away from the other man long enough to type in the order. “That’s going to be twelve dollars and forty-nine cents.” Magnus leaned across the counter slightly, smiling. “Could I get your name?”

“Um. Yeah. I’m Alec.” 

“Alec.” Magnus handed Alec his receipt. When Alec reached out to take it, Magnus noticed the tattoos on the inside of his wrist, a complex swirling pattern that extended up under the sleeve of his sweater. “I’m Magnus.”

“Nice to meet you.” Alec was definitely blushing. 

“I’ll have these drinks ready in just a minute,” Magnus said. He turned and grabbed two coffee cups from the stack. He had no idea which drink was for Alec, so he scribbled his phone number on the side of the nearest one. 

o-o-o-o-o

“Here.” Alec handed Izzy her dragon fruit drink and Jace one of the coffees. 

“That barista was flirting with you,” Izzy said casually, taking a sip of her drink. 

“What?” Alec had been about to take a sip of his coffee. He set the cup back down on the table. “He was not.” 

Jace smiled. “Then explain this.” He turned his own cup around. There were seven numbers written on the side. “I think this one’s for you, bro.” 

“Oh.” Alec reached out and took the cup from Jace. “Huh.”

He looked over at the counter. The barista—Magnus—was handing another group of customers their drinks.

“You think he’s hot,” Izzy said. It was an observation, not a question. “Ask him out.”

“I just met him!” Alec said. “Once! For five minutes. Who asks someone out after five minutes?” 

“Oh my God,” Izzy said. “You’re hopeless.”

On stage, one of the microphones squealed. Everyone clapped their hands over their ears. 

“Hello everyone!” A boy with messy brown hair was standing behind the mic. “We’re the Mortal Instruments. Thanks for coming out tonight.” 

The crowd cheered. 

Jace elbowed Izzy in the side. “I didn’t think you were into lead guitarists.”

“I didn’t think you were into redheads, but you’ve been shooting heart eyes at Clary the whole night,” Izzy said. “I notice you’re also too chicken to ask her out.”

“I’ll talk to Clary if Alec talks to the barista,” Jace said.

The band had started to play, and the music was loud enough that no one heard when Alec said, “I’ll think about it.”

o-o-o-o-o

“So,” Clary said. “Simon’s off with Izzy and her brothers, and we have to clean up.”

“Why can’t Luke take care of it?” Magnus asked. “He owns the place.” 

“He and my mom are having date night,” Clary said. “It’s on us.” 

Magnus tossed the rag he’d been using to wipe down the tables into the sink. “Speaking of Isabelle’s brothers,” he said. “I saw you talking to Trace.”

“His name is Jace,” Clary said. “And we were just talking. You were staring at Alec.”

“Maybe I was,” Magnus said. “So what? I don’t even know if he likes guys. Or if he’ll call.”

“I mean,” Clary said. “He was staring at you, too. Here.” She handed him a beat-up old wallet. “It was on the floor by his seat.”

“This feels like stalking,” Magnus said, taking the wallet from her. 

“It is not,” Clary said. “It’s not like you’re Googling him. You just happened to have a friend who knows his sister’s boyfriend, and she told you that the Lightwood siblings run a tattoo parlor called Light Art, and that it’s just down the street from Taki’s.”

o-o-o-o-o

Alec stood behind the counter of the parlor with an empty coffee cup in one hand and the parlor’s phone in the other.

He had fifteen minutes until he had to open for the day. His siblings were still asleep. Normally, Alec would have woken them by now, but if he was going to do this, he wanted to be uninterrupted. 

Alec had never done something like this before. He didn’t have much dating experience. There had been a few guys in high school that his parents had found out about and disowned him for, and there had been a casual fling or two since then that had ended quickly. 

Still, there was something about Magnus. Something about the sound of his voice and the light in his eyes, and Alec knew he sounded ridiculous, but he really did want to call. 

But he didn’t. He stared at the phone until the clock on the wall shifted to nine, and then he opened the parlor and got to work. 

o-o-o-o-o

Magnus stopped outside the glass door, studying the writing on the outside. Light Art Tattoo Parlor, printed above a design of swirling flames. 

It was definitely the right place. Magnus pushed the door open. 

The walls were covered in art. Magnus spotted a knot of thorns, a golden sword, a series of spirals formed by a silver whip, a demon with dark bat wings—and fire. Fire covered the walls, sketched into swirling loops, exhaled from the mouths of dragons, burning across the walls and pages. It was breathtaking. Magnus wondered who had drawn the flames. Was it Alec?

A few feet away from him, a customer was lying face down on a table. Their shirt was draped over a nearby chair, and Isabelle stood over them, needle in hand. Magnus could hear the whir of the needle from the doorway. 

Without looking up, she said, “Could you wait by the counter? Someone should be out in just a second—Jace! Alec! Customer!” The last three words were a shout. 

“Oh, I’m not here for a tattoo,” Magnus said. “I think I have something of your brother’s?” 

Izzy glanced up. Magnus dangled the wallet between his fingers. 

“Oh,” she said. “Oh. You know what? How about you take that to him. Alec’s in the back.” She nodded toward a curtain hanging across the back of the parlor. 

“Thank you.” Magnus crossed the shop and ducked behind the curtain. 

Alec was sitting at a table in the back, head bowed over a piece of paper. Magnus could hear the faint scratching sound of Alec’s pencil. He was drawing, so engrossed in his work that he hadn’t heard Magnus enter, or Izzy’s shout from earlier. 

Alec’s hair flopped forward, hiding his expression. Even without being able to see his face, Magnus could tell that Alec was completely lost in his art. Every line of his body leaned toward the page. It would have been a crime to interrupt. 

Alec looked up. “Oh!” he said. “Magnus. Um. Hi.”

“Hello, Alec,” Magnus said. “You left this at the Gray Wolf.” Magnus set Alec’s wallet down on the table. Alec sighed in relief. 

“I was looking for that. Thanks so much.” He reached out and pocketed the wallet. 

“And since I’m here,” Magnus said. “How would you feel about getting dinner with me?”

“What?” Alec set his pencil down and twisted to face Magnus. For the first time, Magnus caught a glimpse of the paper. A single cat’s eye stared up from the page, lined in thick black pencil smudges like eyeliner. 

Alec saw Magnus looking and flipped the sheet over. 

“I…,” Alec said. “If it’s cheap.” 

“I know a place,” Magnus said. “If you’re interested.”

Alec blushed, and Magnus smiled. This was going better than he’d expected. 

“Sure,” Alec said. 

“I’ll mee you at the Gray Wolf,” Magnus said. “Eight o’clock tonight?”

“Yeah,” Alec said. “Yeah, I’ll be there.”

“Wonderful. I’ll see you tonight.” Magnus winked and turned around, pushing his way past the curtain and out of the shop.

o-o-o-o-o

Alec paced back and forth outside of the Gray Wolf, wondering if he was supposed to go in. 

He couldn’t see Magnus through the windows; only Clary was behind the counter. It was 7:45. 

“You’re early.” 

Alec turned around. Magnus stood behind him, wearing a long black coat, a blue scarf, and eyeliner. Alec had never stopped to consider how attractive eyeliner could be on a guy, but he was thinking about it now. 

“Are you ready?”

“Yes.” Alec fell into step beside Magnus as he led the way down the block. It was early December, and Alec’s fingers were freezing. He stuffed them into the pockets of his jeans. 

“You’re cold,” Magnus said. He unwrapped his scarf and draped it around Alec’s neck. “That suits you, actually. It brings out your eyes.”

“Oh,” Alec said. “Thanks.” 

“And…here we are,” Magnus said. He stopped them in front of a small diner that Alec must have walked past a hundred times, but had never entered. “Taki’s. Best food in the city.”

“I’ve never eaten here,” Alec confessed, and Magnus smiled.

“Well then. Prepare to have your eyes opened.” Magnus reached for the door handle. “After you.” 

Alec stepped into the diner. 

o-o-o-o-o

“So,” Magnus said. “Why a tattoo parlor?”

“What?” Alec looked up from his hamburger. Magnus was right—it was one of the best he’d ever had. 

“Clearly, you wanted to be an artist,” Magnus said. “So why did you pick tattooing?” 

“Because… the starving artist thing doesn’t pay the bills, and I have three siblings I’m responsible for,” Alec said. “And you can charge a decent amount for tattoos.”

“You have some, right?” Magnus nodded to Alec’s sleeves, which didn’t quite cover the patterns extending down his wrists. 

“Yeah. They go up my arms and down my back. I, uh, could show you. Later.” 

Alec realized what he’d just said and blushed. Magnus arched an eyebrow. 

“Oh? I might take you up on that.” 

Alec’s blush deepened. 

“So,” he said. “So…what about you? Why the Gray Wolf?”

Magnus shrugged. “I’m kind of between full-time jobs at the moment. My friend’s parents own the shop, and she offered me a job.”

For a moment, Alec wondered what that would be like, to have friends supporting you, instead of always being the one supporting others. Alec’s only friends were Helen and Aline, and they were busy taking care of Helen’s siblings. 

“Can I ask you something?” Magnus asked. He leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table. Alec told himself not to get distracted by Magnus’s eyes, and failed. 

“What? Sure.”

“How did you end up taking care of three younger siblings?”

Alec blinked. “Oh. Well. I don’t really take care of Izzy and Jace. They’re adults.” It wasn’t true, and Magnus clearly saw that, but Alec kept going. “And Max isn’t so bad. Our father is dead, and Mom… she left for a better job. A long time ago.”

“And she couldn’t help you at all? Even with Max?” Magnus asked. Alec shrugged. 

“She wouldn’t help me if I asked, anyway. Neither of them was exactly thrilled when I came out.” 

“I’m sorry,” Magnus said. He looked down at the table. “You never should have had to deal with that.”

Alec cleared his throat, slightly awkward. He knew his situation wasn’t ideal. No one had ever told him it shouldn’t have happened. No one had ever implied that Alec should have been able to live his life for himself, instead of for his siblings. 

“Thanks,” Alec said. He didn’t know how to say everything he’d been thinking, but from the shine in Magnus’s eyes, Alec thought maybe he understood.

o-o-o-o-o

Alec took Magnus back to the tattoo parlor after the date. 

“Do you want to go back to the parlor?” Alec had asked. “I can show you around. Or is it too soon to bring you home? Is that weird?”

“You live there?” Magnus had asked. 

“Above the shop.”

Magnus had taken Alec’s hand. “We’ll stay downstairs.” 

Now they were standing in the center of the main room. Magnus was spinning around slowly, taking it all in—the art covering the walls, the chairs and padded tables where customers sat, the carts of equipment, and the colorful metallic swirls Izzy had painted all over the floor when they’d first started renting the place. 

“Do you draw all of these?” Magnus asked. A lot of the art was painted right onto the wall, but most of it was framed sketches and paintings. Magnus trailed his finger along the bottom of one of the frames. Alec knew which drawing Magnus was looking at without having to ask. 

Alec had drawn that himself, ten years ago. He’d been eleven years old, doodling on the back of his math homework. He’d seen that simple swirl of flames and known what he wanted to do. Now, it was the logo of Light Art. Alec didn’t even care that it was weird to have a math worksheet framed. 

“I drew that one,” Alec said. “I was eleven. It’s what inspired… this.” Alec gestured to the entire parlor. “Jace and Izzy do a lot of the art, though. Even Max has drawn a few”

“Artistic family,” Magnus commented. He turned and met Alec’s eyes. “It’s all amazing.” 

Alec’s breath caught. He was so used to people coming in and out, telling Alec what they wanted and expecting it to be prefect—no room for mistakes or creative freedom. And here was Magnus, who just appreciated the art on the walls.

“Which one’s your favorite?” Magnus asked. 

Alec laughed. His favorite wasn’t on the wall.

“I did say I’d show you my tattoos,” Alec said. “It’s one I drew. Izzy and Jace did all the actual tattooing, obviously. It’s not on the wall because I didn’t want someone else to get it.” 

Alec shrugged off his old gray sweater and, feeling acutely self-conscious, his tee shirt. He pretended not to notice Magnus’s gaze and turned around.

Alec had tattoos climbing from his wrists up both arms, spilling over his shoulders and down his back. He’d known, starting a tattoo parlor, that he’d need tattoos; he’d put a lot more thought into his than Izzy and Jace had put into theirs. 

Alec’s tattoo was one he’d spent hours working on, night after night. It showed four hands, all emerging from the abstract border of strange symbols and flames surrounding them. That border was the same design that extended down to Alec’s wrists. The hands themselves all curved inward in a spiral, each hand cupped so that the fingers formed a circle of clear, unmarked skin at the center of Alec’s back. One hand was larger, with black marks on the back of it. One’s skin was more golden than the others. One wore a silver bracelet. One was far smaller than the rest.  

“Alec,” Magnus said. “It’s beautiful.” 

Alec didn’t have to ask if Magnus knew what his tattoo was for. It was obvious to anyone who knew Alec. 

Alec still had his back to Magnus, but he heard footsteps, and then Magnus was only a few inches away from him. Alec felt the ghost of Magnus’s fingertips on his back, tracing the hand that was modeled after Alec’s own. 

Magnus’s fingers moved across Alec’s back, to the space in the center of the hands, where there was no ink, and up Alec’s spine to the back of his neck. Alec wasn’t sure he remembered how to breathe. 

“Alec,” Magnus said. 

“Yeah?”

“Could you do something for me?” 

“Um, yeah. Sure.” 

“Could you turn around?” 

Alec did. Magnus was so close, Alec almost bumped into him. And then Magnus leaned even closer. 

“Is this okay?” Magnus asked. Alec knew that if he said no, Magnus would back off. Alec could send Magnus away and go back to work. He could draft a dozen new tattoos for tomorrow and work without the distraction of a boy in his life, and never see Magnus again. 

Magnus, the first person in a long time who had looked at Alec as a whole person on his own. Not just as a member of the Lightwood family. Not just as his sibling’s caretaker. Just as Alec.

It wasn’t a very difficult decision. 

“This is more than okay,” Alec said. 

“Just wanted to clarify,” Magnus said. “Because I really want to kiss you right now.” 

Alec leaned forward and kissed Magnus, instead. 

o-o-o-o-o

They kissed for a few minutes in the parlor, and Alec thought about inviting Magnus upstairs, but he shared a room with his brother, and Alec did not want to have to explain any of this to Jace.

Magnus and Alec ended up leaving the parlor. Alec locked the door behind them and sent a message to the group chat he shared with his siblings, telling them he’d be back later that night, or early the next morning. Magnus reached over to take Alec’s hand. Alec let him. 

“Where should we go?” Alec asked. Magnus shrugged and tugged Alec after him in a random direction. 

They ended up taking the subway into Brooklyn, and Magnus led the way through the streets to his loft. They stopped and kissed on the doorstep, and again in Magnus’s living room. Then Magnus went into his kitchen and made hot chocolate. 

Alec smiled when he realized what was in the mugs. “Thanks. It’s freezing out there.” 

Magnus sat down next to Alec on his cream-colored sofa. He didn’t even care if he spilled his drink on it. 

Alec took a sip of his cocoa. “Wow. This is really good.”

Magnus laughed. “I can’t take credit. It’s the Starbucks stuff.” 

“Oh. Do they have good hot chocolate, or something?”

“Alexander.” Magnus shook his head in disbelief. “You’ve never had Starbucks hot chocolate?” 

“No.”

“Next date. We’re going to Starbucks.” 

Alec set his mug down on the coffee table. “Did you… you want to go out with me again?”

“Of course.” Magnus set his drink down next to Alec’s and reached for his hands. “I made out with you in a tattoo parlor and then brought you to my apartment, Alec, what do you think?” 

“I mean, when you say it like that…” 

Magnus laughed and leaned in. Alec closed his eyes.

o-o-o-o-o

When Magnus woke up the next morning, Alec was still asleep. His black hair was a tangled mess on the pillow, and he was curled on his side, one arm extended in Magnus’s direction. Magnus vaguely remembered them falling asleep holding hands.

Magnus ran his fingers through Alec’s hair. Alec didn’t wake up, but he mumbled something in his sleep and turned his head in Magnus’s direction. 

Magnus thought Alexander Lightwood might be a very easy person to fall in love with.

He got up and made them both cups of coffee.

o-o-o-o-o

One Year Later

“Hey, biscuit. I need to ask you for a favor,” Magnus said.

Clary didn’t look away from the whipped cream bottle in her hand and the drink in front of her. “No guarantees. I have a date tonight.” 

“I need someone to clean up for me,” Magnus said. “I’m supposed to be over at Light Art by eight.”

“Can’t, sorry. Jace is picking me up at seven. Can Simon do it?” 

“I already asked. He’s at some nerdy gaming convention with Isabelle. I didn’t even know Isabelle liked video games.”

“Oh, she does,” Clary said. “The really violent ones where your character is a complete badass. Didn’t you hear what happened after Simon introduced her to Tomb Raider?”

“Alexander did mention that,” Magnus said. 

Clary looked at Magnus and sighed. “I’ll call my parents. It’s their shop, they can put some extra effort in just this once.”

Magnus grinned at Clary. “Thank you, biscuit.” 

o-o-o-o-o

Luke and Jocelyn were both behind the counter when Jace walked into the shop. He wasn’t alone. 

“Alexander.” Magnus abandoned his apron next to the espresso machine and went to kiss his boyfriend. “I was going to meet you in an hour.” 

“Jace mentioned he was coming over. I thought I’d say hi. We’ve got our new artist holding down the fort.”

“How’s Mark doing?” Magnus asked. 

“You know, he’s a little strange,” Jace said. “But I like him. I especially like when his little brother makes those pancakes for us. That kid has a future in culinary arts.” 

“Come on, Jace,” Alec said. “Don’t you have somewhere to be?” 

“Yes,” Clary said. She’d appeared from behind the counter, apron off, her red hair tied back. 

“I’ll see you later,” Alec said. Jace clapped his brother on the shoulder and followed Clary out the front door. 

Alec reached for Magnus’s hand. “Ready?”

“Absolutely.” 

o-o-o-o-o

Mark Blackthorn was just closing up the tattoo parlor when Magnus and Alec got there. 

“Everything’s put away,” he said. “And Julien came by with more pancakes. I left them on the table in the back.” 

“Thank him for us,” Alec said. “And tell Aline to text me back, will you?”

“Yeah,” Mark said. “I’ve got to go, I’m actually late for something. I’ll see you tomorrow.”  

“Bye, Mark,” Alec said. Magnus waved. 

“Okay.” Alec went over to one of the tattoo stations and pulled out a needle. “You’re sure about this?” 

“I already said I was,” Magnus said. He sat down in one of the chairs and rolled up his sleeve. “Go ahead.”

o-o-o-o-o

When Alec was done, he wrapped Magnus’s arm in plastic and gave him the same instructions he’d give to anyone. “I’ll give you a sheet with tips for taking care of it. It’s going to itch, fair warning. Keep it dry for the next week.”

“Got it,” Magnus said.

“Do you want a pancake?” 

“I would love a pancake.”

Alec and Magnus went into the back room, where, sure enough, there was a plate of pancakes sitting on the table under a layer of plastic wrap. Alec grabbed them and led the way upstairs. He stuck the plate in the microwave and made hot chocolate to go with them.

“I love this,” Alec said, sitting down next to Magnus on his old, shitty sofa. 

“What?” Magnus asked, balancing his plate of pancakes on his knees. 

“All of this. Getting this place to ourselves for once. The fact that you just got a tattoo. Hot chocolate in the middle of the night. You.” 

Magnus smiled and set his food on the end table so he could tug Alec closer to him. “I love you, too.” 

[gloomyhearts]

Always by your side || Luke Patterson

Chapter twenty~ wish I could be her

2020

“You’re early dear.“

Sabrina rolls her eyes, “didn’t wanted to have another jolt.”

“You’re commendable.”

“Whatever,” she moves past him to the drums.

“I don’t like that attitude,” his hand touches her shoulder, stopping her, “you know I’m old and experienced a lot, including emotions.. well, you must think I don’t have any, yet I was a teenager myself, Sabrina. I loved this woman, she was my assistant and we had quite a fun time, it was exquisite, we were about to marry and then I died, I drowned during my legerdemain. I saw her marrying another guy, they settled down and started a family,” a split second his blue eyes lost their sparkling, tears formed as well, the corner of his lips fell down, “but here there ain’t no misery,” he chuckles and leave her to her thoughts.

The night went by quite fast and Sabrina went to a room Caleb freed for her, to have at least some space to herself.

They’d be a great couple. Alex and Reggie were happy too. They’re all so relieved with her, I‘m just a burden to the band, distract them from the important things. Luke, oh his eyes were so bright, he was so focused on her, he couldn’t get rid of that smile.

Someone knocked on the door, breaking the girl out of her thoughts, “come in!”

Brown eyes observed the blonde girl on the bed, “you good?” he moved further into the room and sat down on the edge.”

She cleared her throat, “yeah, totally..” whipping some tears dry.

“You totally look like it,” he chuckles grabbing her hand, “I know we don’t really talk and you don’t like me but it’s really depressing seeing you like this, you weren’t even pretending to enjoy the show tonight.”

Her eyes trailed off his body down to his hand on her shin, “I was at the gig of Alex and the others and..” she gulped, “well they’re really indulge to the band, to Julie.”

Maybe it was how she said her name or that she even mentioned her name but Willie knew exactly what’s wrong. “Wills..” she shakes her head, “you deserve better than him. There was this young man tonight he couldn’t take his eyes off of you,” he nudges her leg.

“What no, no, no Willie,” she giggles, hiding her face in her hands.

“Why?”

“That’s odd.”

“Then you’ll die alone.”

She knitted her brows, lips pressed to a thin line, “what?” a nervous laughter escaped her lips, “dude, I’m already dead,” she shoves his head a few inches backwards.

“How’s Alex by the way?”

“Fine, I think, didn’t talk to him properly in a few..”

“That’s.. good, good.”

“Huh what’s going on between you two,” she wiggles her brows.

“Nothing. If I’m nearing them, Caleb will kill me.”

“No joke?” the brunette shakes his head, Sabrina decreased the space between them, her lips almost touching his ear, “then we’ve to kill him first.”

Willie froze, in her voice was determent, it was serious, she meant what she’d said.

“What?” he mutters to her.

“We have to kill this arse.”

“You think we could?”

“Of course, with teamwork everything is possible.”

“But we’re just two.”

“Who said we were alone?”

Sabrina promised herself to make up with the guys, well maybe excluding Luke but that wasn’t the point right now.

She approached at the garage door and through the door she could see Luke and Julie alone in there, he had his guitar in front of his body and she sat behind the keyboard, their backs facing the blonde girl.

Step into my world

Bittersweet love story about a girl

Shook me to the core

Voice like an angel, I've never heard before

Here in front of me

Shining so much brighter than I have ever seen

Life can be so mean

But when he goes I know he doesn't leave

They were sharing the microphone which was at her keyboard.

The truth is finally breaking through

Two worlds collide when I'm with you

Our voices rise and soar so high

We come to life when we're

She stands up and Luke places his guitar on the ground, the melody still playing in their heads.

In perfect harmony

Whoa, whoa

Perfect harmony

Whoa, whoa

Perfect harmony

You set me free

You and me together is more than chemistry

Love me as I am

I'll hold your music here inside my hands

We say we're friends, we play pretend

You're more to me, we're everything

Our voices rise and soar so high

We come to life when we're

They were dancing, well more like swaying, close, touching.

In perfect harmony

Whoa, whoa

Perfect harmony

Whoa, whoa

Perfect harmony

Eyes locked, both wearing a radiant smile, letting her heart break into two. Her green eyes flooded with tears, still she couldn't take her eyes off them.

I feel your rhythm in my heart, yeah

You are my brightest, burning star, whoa-whoa

I never knew a love so real (so real)

We're heaven on Earth, melody and words

And when we are together we're In perfect harmony

Whoa, whoa Perfect harmony

Whoa, whoa

We say we're friends

We play pretend

You're more to me

We create a perfect harmony

Some passages were familiar to the blonde, my book! Those are my.. he just.. what the..?! he did not just used them to another girl!

She clenched her hands into fists, feeling her cheeks begin to burn, her nostrils flattering. The girl was ready to break their special moment, their connection, but she couldn’t think straight, she would cry stepping into the room with the pair.

Julie stalked past the blonde, not noticing her; well maybe Sabrina doesn’t want to be seen by her.

Shortly after Luke poofed out of the room, at least so thought Sabrina.

Her fingers sliding over it; she placed her new purple book in front of her on it and hits the cold keys, she hadn’t played it since twenty five years, her voice probably just raspy; although she sang with Caleb but that was just the chorus, nothing like it was before.

Being in love with you seems like a really good idea

But I watched your eyes

as she walks by

Leaving you all tongue tied

But being in love

with you seems

like a really good idea

Does she even realise

what I’d give

for her life

To be mine

But being in love

with you seems

like a really good idea

why would you ever kiss me

when she always looks so pretty

she’ll always be better

how could I ever measure

I try but you’ll never love me like her

her voice gave almost in, she gulped trying to swallow the lump in her throat.

I could usually fight this

And sometimes I'm fine with the pain

I thought I got over this feeling

I hoped that by now I'd forget

And how do I know when you fell out of love?

So when did you fall out of love?

But why did you fall out of love?

But being in love

with you seems

like a really good idea

The song ended and she stared at the wall opposite of her, tears streaming down her cheeks.

[calumbringbackthewatermelonshirt]

Hiraeth (C.H.) Part 2

FIND PART 1 HERE

a/n: I think after this I’m probably going to try and update once a week to keep things consistent! please enjoy and lmk what y'all think!! also feel free to send me any questions!

“I believe you owe me something.” You had set your tray at your spot at the usual table. The time had come. Your cravings had taken over. The need for some awful, over sugared coffee was consuming your every thought. Except for the ones about Cal. But coffee. Coffee was something you could have, and soon at that.

“And what would that be?” Classic Ashton. Playing dumb. You were relentless, though. Especially when he had something you so desperately wanted.

“We both know. A ride into town. I’m thinking Dunkin first, then target, then chipotle for a quick bite, then more Dunkin.” You had been ticking off your town to-do list on your fingers as you went, wearing a smile very similar to the Sierra wore when she was up to something.

“As much as I would love to drag your sorry ass around the entire town, I’m busy tonight.” You frowned, knowing that if you didn’t go tonight that you might very well die from withdrawal. That and you’d have to wait another week and a half before your schedules aligned enough again to make the trip.

“Fuck.” You dropped your feet from the table and sighed, running a hand through your hair and screwing up the part in it. It would be fine, you’d manage. You’d run out of toothpaste and eyeliner, but you’d live.

“However, my plans do not involve my car, so I’ve arranged to have someone take you in my place.” You perked up again. Even though you didn’t appreciate being toyed with, you could appreciate the dramatics of it. After all, it was fun when you were on the other side of it.

“Hell yeah! Is it Crystal? She’s cool.” You pumped your fist, practically buzzing with excitement. Even better. You could already picture yourself and Crystal screaming the lyrics to the High School Musical soundtrack together.

“Nope. Hood.” Ashton knew he piqued your interest when he saw your eyebrows shoot up. All a part of Sierra’s plan of course. The elusive Hood, who’s name you still did not know. You’d finally be able to meet the most mysterious man on campus.

“Even better. I get to meet the mysterious ‘Hood.’” You put air quotes around his name. At this point, you weren't even sure he was a real person.

“There is a bit of a hitch. With Hood comes four irresponsible teens.” Ashton winked at you, knowing exactly what he was doing. He had to give Sierra her credit where it was due. This plan was brilliant. Instead of one, Hood would now be operating with four wingmen, each one more bold than the last. Ashton could almost picture the dumbfounded look on Hood’s face when they started to hint at their end goal.

“Fine by me. As long as I get my coffee.” You stood and leaned in closer to Ashton, feeling his breath on your face. It was your hand slipped into his pocket, a twenty finding its way into your sleeve and his keys dangling between your fingers. You dangeled them from your fingers, still grinning at Ashton as you backed away and shot off a text to the members of your group.

….

It took about twenty minutes of scrolling on your phone until you finally heard footsteps and the lively, somewhat loud chatter that surrounded your little group approaching.

Your fingers flying, you shot off one last text and looked up.

Only to be met with a very familiar pair of dark brown eyes.

Elevator guy?

A million questions ricocheted in your brain. What was ele- Cal doing here? With your gaggle of friends?And why was he carrying Luke on his back piggyback style?

You froze, head cocked and eyebrow raised. Cal strongly resembled a deer in headlights at this moment, having missed a step when he noticed it was you leaning against the car. Luke didn’t notice; instead, he took two fistfulls of Cal’s hair, as if trying to control him that way, like Remy and Linguini in Ratatouille.

Michael was the first to catch on to the tension between the two of you. He head swished back and forth a few times, trying to patch together why both of you had reacted to each other like that. It took a second to click. “Wait, do you two know each other?”

“We’ve met. Briefly.” You winked at Cal and slid your phone into the pocket of your jeans, procuring Ashton’s keys in its place. You jingled them before the group for a second before tossing them over to Cal. Kaykay gave her best attempt to snatch them out of the air, but Cal caught them easily over her head, appearing to still be a little bit stunned by your presence.

“Wait a second. You’ve met?” Sierra was screeching. You and Hood were supposed to meet like this, not however you had met before. This couldn’t be right, one misstep could throw off her whole plan, and she had NOT gone to the lengths of planning your wedding only to have it be for nothing.

“Um, yes. Just for a second, though. In the elevator up to the first bell classes.” Hood dropped Luke from his back unceremoniously. Instead, he studied the keys in his hands, looking again like he wanted the earth to swallow him whole. You were starting to wonder why he looked like that every time he saw you.

“So you’re the famous ‘Hood’ I’ve been hearing about.” You grinned and pushed yourself off of the car, crossing your arms. You took a few steps toward him. “I was beginning to doubt you even existed.”

Kaykay snorted and stopped messing with Luke's hair for a second. “You two have met. Obviously he existed.”

“No, no. I met Cal. Hood was a rumor.” Kaykay and Sierra turned and gave each other a look. They seemed to be in agreement that maybe the prior meeting wasn’t so bad.

“Alright, alright. Are we going or not?” Hood sighed and stalked around to the driver’s side, getting into the car before anyone of them could even think of saying anything.

You turned and hopped in the passenger’s side. Only to hear five other people shouting at you.

Apparently, getting in the car was cause for rioting these days.

“Hey, why do you get shotgun?” Kaykay was the first one to say something vaguely coherent. She almost never got shotgun, and she had kind of been hoping that today would be her day.

“Yeah, hey, I want shotgun.” Sierra was next, speaking fast. She was right next to the door, tugging on the handle. But before she could make her first pull, Hood clicked the lock button on his side of the car, effectively shutting all the kids out.

“It’s not too late. We can drive off and leave them now.” Cal? Hood? sighed out his words, leaning forward and putting his head on the steering wheel.

“Oh, come on. You know you love them. It’s obvious. Besides, the only way they’re gonna get me out of this seat is if they kill me first.” You turned to the window and stuck out your tongue at the kids staring at you through the window before putting on your seatbelt.

“Have you met Kaykay?” Hood smirked at you, looked out at the murder written on Kaykay’s face, and then back at you. “That might not be as hard as you think.”

“Believe it or not I’m tougher than I look.” You unlocked the car with the button on your side, but flipped the lock on your door back.

The kids piled into the car, grumbling about being shoved into the back.

“Damn. I wanted up front.” Michael climbed in behind Hood, but not before leaning the seat forward to allow the two youngest to clamber into the back.

“Yeah, yeah. We all wanted shotgun.” Kaykay was behind you, picking at her fingernails, disgruntled. “Can I at least have the AUX?”

“No offense, Kay, but no one wants to listen to death metal.” Sierra wrinkled her nose at the idea of having to headbang and messing up her hairstyle. Her space buns may have looked messy and spiky, but that was a carefully curated look that had taken her a while to perfect.

“I wanna listen to Mozart. I find it calming. You know, statistically, babies who have mozart played to them in the womb come out smarter?” Luke was a big fan of classical music, despite his younger age. He found it versatile, great for both studying and falling asleep to.

“Makes sense. I guess your mom must have played you a lot of Mozart when you were little, huh?” You twisted around in your seat and smiled at Luke for a second, who flushed, but still smiled back. “How about we all choose one song to go on a playlist and we can turn that on shuffle?”

All the children shrugged and nodded, so you called names and collected the songs into one playlist on your phone, playing it through the car stereo a bit louder than was necessary.

“That is the fastest they have ever agreed on anything ever.” Hood looked at you out of the side of his eyes before turning his attention back to the road. “And the fastest solution we’ve ever procured for an argument.”

You shrugged. “What can I say? I’m a natural leader.”

Most of the songs on the playlist ended up being ones you all knew enough to sing along to, asides from the cello melody (Luke) and the heavy metal music (Kaykay).

It took about half an hour and another song draft to reach Dunkin. By the time you got there you were practically vibrating with excitement. Hood kept glancing at you, a small smile at his lips and mirth in his eyes. Apparently, he took great amusement in your love for mediocre coffee.

Instead of attempting to corral all the kids in and out of the restaurant, Hood figured the drive through would be a more time effective option.

Kaykay demanded to order for herself, despite being on the wrong side of the car and in the back seat. Still, Michael rolled down his window obediently, just sighing and leaning back when she unbuckled her seatbelt and climbed into his lap to talk into the speaker.

You went next. You felt bold for no reason today. That was the only explanation for what you did. Mirroring Kaykay, you too unbuckled, leaning over Hood’s lap to rest your weight on the car door.

“I’ll have six shots of espresso, over ice, with a caramel drizzle, please.” You heard a scoff from inside the car, turning to find Kaykay gaping at you.

“That’s enough caffeine to kill a small horse.” Kaykay was a little amazed, and a lot worried. You didn’t even order milk. That was gonna taste like battery acid.

“Are you okay?” Sierra looked absolutely disgusted at the mere thought of your coffee order. Even though she was more of a tea person, Sierra liked her coffee as sweet as her personality.

“I think it sounds good. Can I have one?” Luke barely got the words out before five simultaneous nos were yelled.

“Luke, honey, I’ve only known you for a couple weeks, but even I can tell that you and coffee would not be a good mix.” You took sympathy on the child, who looked downright embarrassed by his chastisement. “How about a hot chocolate instead?”

Luke seemed to perk up by that idea, and when the car pulled up to the window, you wordlessly handed Hood your debit card.

“I have cash with me. How much was my drink?” Michael was the first to ask. You knew it was coming, the onslaughts of ‘let me pay you backs’ and ‘here's the money for my drinks.’ But that wasn’t gonna happen, at least not today.

“This one’s on me.” It was simple enough, but all the kids still looked suspicious. You rolled your eyes, a little offended that you had to explain being nice. “Think of it as a thank you. You know, for taking pity on me and allowing me into your little group.”

They still all looked like you were about to tell them their dog had died.

“Fine. My parents are loaded, I took the RA job cause I wanted my own room, and the way I communicate love is through gifts. Happy?”  You sighed and slurped down half your coffee in one sip.

“Isn’t it almost freezing outside?” Hood was the first to break the somewhat awkward silence. “Are you sure drinking an iced drink was the best choice?”

You grinned slowly. “It’s time I told you my life motto. If you can’t handle a cold drink during the winter, your bloodline is weak.”

Seeing as you had the only iced drink in the car, this caused a bit of an uproar.

…

“Hey.” Cal had turned down the music in the car. Aside from Kaykay, who had her headphones in, you and Cal were the only two people awake. So when he broke the silence on the ride back to campus, it startled you just a touch.

“Hey yourself.”

“I, um, I had fun today. It was nice to see you again.” You made a mental note about Cal: he reverted to CEO mode when he got nervous. Well, you assumed he was nervous. He wouldn’t make eye contact with you, so you figured you were probably right.

“You, too.” His nervousness was kind of endearing, you thought. Even if it made talking to him a little bit awkward and choppy.

“You know, I’m actually pretty grateful Ashton bailed on me.” Calum’s eyes widened a bit, but you ignored it. You had a feeling if you pointed it out, Cal might do something drastic like bailing from the car while it was still moving.

“Oh?” Hood attempted to keep his expression neutral, but there were all sorts of bells and alarms going off in his head.

“Yeah, it was fun spending time with all of you. Being part of a group like this…” Your tongue darted out of your mouth and wetted your lips. You rolled them together and then drew your bottom lip in between your teeth. They were such a tight knit group, and while all of them were welcoming and kind to you… it was still hard to not feel like an outsider. You didn’t regret it, of course, but there was a nagging feeling in the back of your mind that this was a honeymoon phase in your friendship. All good things came to an end. You just hoped it would be later rather than sooner. “It feels like a family.”

“We’ve only known each other for three months.” Cal looked at you out of the side of his eye, skeptical. He was close with his little gang, but family was a bit of a stretch in his opinion. Sure, he spent all his time with them and looked after them, and cared about them, of course. But that didn’t exactly mean they were family.

“Cal, you literally make them bring you their report cards so you can make sure they’re doing okay in all of their classes.” Was he kidding you? It was funny how the man in front of you was able to delude himself in believing that was true.

“I don’t give a damn about their grades.” Hood scoffed. He had his own problems that didn’t include the grades of a bunch of freshmen and sophomores.

“You give so many damns they’re visible from space.” The lies about not caring were probably to keep up his stone cold loner ruse. They were, of course, lies, but you didn’t want to spoil that for him.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” Hood was grumbling, but there was a slight chuckle behind it.

…

It was a couple of days before you had the time to speak to Cal again. The older kids used a ‘divide and conquer’ method to keep tabs on the troublemakers of the bunch, which was a lot more difficult than you remembered babysitting to be.

It was in the library. You had been in there for a couple hours at that point, desperate to get in some studying for your test in AP history. That table had been your best friend for a while now, so when Crystal started her shift and came over to chat, it was a welcomed interruption.

“Hey. What are you doing?” She motioned to a chair, sliding it out and taking a seat only after you waved at her that it was okay.

“Just doing some cramming before my history test tomorrow.” You sighed, marking your page in your history book before slamming it shut and sliding down in your seat. “You?”

“Luke asked me to pick some books up for him, despite having not yet finished the ones he’s already checked out.” Crystal made her hands busy flipping through the pages of the books Luke requested. They didn’t seem bad, just… tedious.

“Our own little genius.” You stood, pushing your chair back as you went. “I’m going to grab some paper from the supply closet.”

As soon as she was sure you were gone, Crystal pulled her phone out of her pocket and shot off a quick text to Sierra.

Sierra smirked from her own table at the library, hiding it just in time from Hood. He was ‘helping’ her study for english. Or so he thought.

“What?” Hood looked up from his own calculus homework. “You’re looking at me weird.”

“Nothing. Will you go grab more printer ink from the supply closet? I need to print off my rough draft, but the computer says the cartridge is empty.” Hood grumbled, but he rose and set off in the direction of the supply closet anyways. Sierra grinned at his back. Phase three was a go.

It only took Hood a couple minutes to cross the library to the supply closet. It was mostly empty as he navigated through the bookshelves. He gave a quick wave to Crystal when he saw her, but didn’t stop to chat since she had her headphones in.

The storage closet was small. It barely fit the few racks of supplies that had been stuffed in there, much less a person. Or two people.

Hood. And you.

Hood, once again, felt himself freeze. He really, really had to stop doing that. It had been a few days since he saw you last, and he wasn’t expecting to see you here.

That was when he heard the door click shut behind him.

“Oh, no.” Hood whirled around, pulling on the door as hard as he could. Nothing. Shit. Shit fucking balls. He had just managed to get the two of you locked in here. Together.

“Oh, no?” You sounded a little concerned and a little offended. ‘Oh no’ was never great, but there was raw fear in Cal’s voice.

“Um, I may or may not have just gotten us locked in here.” Hood rolled his lips into his mouth. Not good. He reached for his phone, only to realize that it was still back at the table with Sierra. He didn’t think he would need it. Apparently, he had forgotten to account for the fact that he was very dumb.

“ Oh. Oh, no.” This time it was your turn to panic and pat yourself down, also searching for your phone. You had yours on you, at least, but it wasn’t much help since the battery had died a half an hour ago.

“Yeah. Not good.” Hood exhaled slowly through his mouth, sliding his back down the door til he was sitting on the ground. “Well, at the very least, we know someone will come for us eventually.”

“We do?” You walked over and took a seat next to him, your shoulder brushing his.

“Yeah. I’m here with Sierra. She sent me to get an ink cartridge. It’ll probably only be a few minutes before she comes looking for me.” Hood glanced down at his watch. 7:38. He would guess they’d be out by 8:00. And that was being generous.

“Good to know. Guess it’s just you and me until then.” You sigh and tipped your head back, leaning it against the door.

“I can think of worse company.” Hood watched as you raised your eyebrows, leaving your eyes closed.

“Hmm. Like Luke hopped up on sugar.” You smirked at your own words. Luke was already hard to control.

“Have you ever met Luke on a sugar high?” Hood leveled his eyes at you, and you peaked the one closest to him open.

“No?”

“Then you will never know how true your words are.” Hood chuckled a bit at the memory of Halloween. They let Luke ration out his own candy. That was mistake number one.

“Oh god. I don’t even want to know.” You grinned, but it was a tired one.

“Can I, um, ask you something?” Hood fiddled with his own fingers, more nervous than he had been in a while. And for what? You were just a person. Okay, maybe not just a person. But there still wasn’t a reason for all the knots in his stomach.

“I’m an open book.”

“Why did you only start as a RA a couple weeks into the school year?” It bothered him to not know. He was an RA and still couldn’t figure out a reason after thinking about it for weeks.

“Oh.” That was not what you were expecting him to ask. “Um, I had applied. The old RA left to go to the public school. That’s pretty much it.”

Hood just hummed. He felt like there might be more to that story, but it wasn’t his place to pry.

“My turn.” After you felt Cal’s eyes on you, you sat up and met them. “You got to ask a question. Now it’s my turn.”

You studied Cal’s face for a second before deciding on your question. “What do you think is your biggest flaw?”

Hood chuckled. “This is gonna be ironic, but probably the fact that my sense of humor doesn’t exist.”

“Now that can't be true. We're talking, laughing.” That much was true. You were both smiling.

“Okay. My turn again?” After a quick confirmation nod from you, Hood asked his next curiosity. “What’s your favorite place on Earth?”

“Home.” It was so simple, just that one word. And yet, you sensed that it had somehow struck deep with both of you. You were sure for different reasons, though.

Your next words were forcibly bright, rushed. “My turn. Do you prefer when people call you Hood or Cal?”

“That would depend on the person, I suppose. Everyone calls me Hood, including most of my teachers.” Hood smiled down at you, as if daring you to do what you were both thinking. “Back to me. How about your favorite book?”

“I can’t choose just one. There’s all sorts of great crap out there.” You smirked. “The fact that I called it crap is meaningless. My turn again. Do you believe in ghosts?”

Hood gaped at you. “Really? You can ask me anything you want, knowing full and well that I have to answer with complete honesty, and you chose to ask if I believe in ghosts?”

“Just answer the damn question.”

“Fine. No, I don’t believe in fucking ghosts.” Hood wasn’t 100% confident in his answer. He believed in the possibility of ghosts, perhaps. But not the existence of the ghosts themselves.

“Look, I just asked if you believed in them. I didn’t ask what you thought about their sexual habits.” Hood pushed your shoulder playfully, chuckling again. He had noticed himself doing that kind of a lot around you. It felt...nice.

The frequency of the questions dwindled after that, most of them escaping as yawns through your lips. More than once you found yourself nodding off in the middle of both questions and answers. Hood found great amusement in it. You would scrunch up your nose and sway a bit, wiping at your face and trying to fight your own body. Eventually, you would succumb to sleep, your head just brushing his shoulder. It would rest there for a split second before bouncing right back, snapping you back to consciousness each time. Each time, your head would use his shoulder as a pillow for just a fraction longer, until eventually you didn’t wake back up.

You were just… sleeping. On him. Really, you were snoring a little. It was cute to him. Hood glanced back at his watch. 8:17. It had been over half an hour, and still no rescue. Hood reached behind him and gave the doorknob a little jiggle again. Still nothing. He sighed, not that he was expecting it to magically open. It was worth a shot.

It was five minutes later Hood heard footsteps. He didn’t even have time to turn around to knock before the door swung open. You and Hood fell flat on your backs without the door supporting your weight, waking you up. In Hood’s arms. He had put his arm around you when you fell to make sure you didn’t hit your head, although, now that he was thinking about it, that was a bit weird. You sat up before he could move, pulling him up with you.

“Sierra. Our savior.” You grinned up at her. Cal was already on his feet, offering you a hand to help you up. You took it, barely using any of your own muscles with the strength he used to pull you up. “Well, this has been a pleasure. I’ll see you around, Calum Hood.”

From there, you went back to your table to gather up your things. It was time to get some real sleep. And not on the shoulder of Calum Hood.

…

tags: @rbforsmileycal​ @whatthefuckimbisexual​

[niall-is-my-dream]

Something Beautiful - Part Two

2035 words

Monty was driving you crazy. He would not leave those stupid fucking ducks alone. You were sure if anyone from the council saw you near them you'd be banned for life for harassment.

You called Monty away from the lake and crossed over the bridge towards a more open space. Throwing the ball you watched Monty race across the Common, he was a lively young pup who needed his daily exercise even if it did look like rain was due any minute.

Watching him chase the ball across the Common you had an overwhelming sense that someone was watching you. 

And you were right.

Niall came walking over the bridge you had just come over, a baseball camp covering his thick wavy hair. The weather had been warming up as it neared the end of March but with rain imminent you were confused to see Niall wearing navy shorts. However, he still teamed it with a grey hoodie that looked incredibly cosy.

He smiled and waved when he saw you looking his way. How long had you been staring at him?

Who knows, but you needed to close your mouth which was surely wide open in shock at how gorgeous he could look while dressed so casual.

 "Hey." He said as he approached you.

 "Hey stalker." You joked.

 "Hardly stalking when you told me where you were going to be!" He smiled.

 "You asked me what I was up to today, I thought you were just making conversation." You smiled back.

Things were awkward between you.

Since you'd sprained your ankle five weeks ago, you had been texting back and forth, but he had ignored your last message that you sent nearly two weeks ago. He had been joking about something and you had replied with 'you're so cute." A completely innocent message, but it has obviously scared him off.

Niall had been all over the place attending some meetings for work, so you hadn't actually seen him in person since he left your flat the day you sprained your ankle. You had been annoyed, upset and embarrassed that he hadn't replied to your text. However, you were a big girl and had been ghosted before, you'd even done the ghosting. So you'd brushed it off and tried to forget about him. But earlier on this morning he had randomly messaged and asked what you were up to today and you had replied politely that you were off to the Common to walk Monty. You hadn't the heart to just ignore his message. You suppose you were clinging onto the hope that he might start messaging you again, as pathetic as that sounds.

It was a busy Saturday morning, lots of people were out walking their dogs or riding their bikes despite the imminent rain. So it surprised you to see Niall so casually seeking you out while you were walking Monty.

"I fancied getting out for a bit. Tried your flat but when there was no answer I assumed you were already here."

"So you are stalking me?!" You smiled politely but inside you were still confused by his appearance.

"Maybe...." He smiled back.

The text messages you had been sharing over the last few weeks were light hearted and full of banter and general conversation. He had messaged you initially a few hours after he left yours, checking to make sure you were ok. You had squealed so loud that you had scared Monty who had been asleep on the arm chair. Since that day you had got over the shock of speaking with him, he was a really humble and down to earth guy. But his radio silence had bugged you, he'd clearly had someone else's attention the last few weeks and you had been tossed aside. As positive as you had tried to be about the ghosting, it had hurt you. Your heart had ached a little at the thought of not speaking to him again.

"So, what are you up to today then?" You asked trying to make polite conversation.

"Well that depends." He replied not reaching your eyes.

Was he blushing?

Now he was making you nervous.

He had ignored you for two weeks and was now acting all coy?

"On?" You nervously asked him.

"If you're free? I have the weekend off and I wondered if you wanted to hang out?" He asked before leaning down and picking up the ball that Monty had dropped at his feet. Niall threw it across the Common and Monty ran off to retrieve it, both of you watching him and not saying anything.

"So do you wanna maybe hang out, if you're free obviously?"

Inside you were screaming yes, but you didn't want him to think you'd drop everything to spend time with him considering that he had been ignoring you. As attracted to Niall as you were, you weren't up for being someone he could pick and choose to converse with whenever he fancied or when he was bored. If he wanted to be your friend he could at least answer your message rather than leaving you on read.

"I have a few things to catch up on today at home, kind of neglected the house stuff while I was recovering from my ankle sprain."

This wasn't actually a lie, but it wasn't exactly the truth.

"Oh ok, yeah sure." He replied looking disappointed.

You nervously gave him a half smile before turning to look across the Common to spot Monty. He came bounding over to you and you reached down and attached his lead.

"I should probably get going before the rain comes." You said to Niall as you looked up in the sky. The dark grey clouds were moving closer to where you were and you didn't plan on getting soaked.

"Yeah, probably a good idea." He replied sounding deflated.

Now he was making you feel guilty.

You weren't going to cave and invite him for a coffee at yours though.

"Right come on Monty, let's go." You said leaning down to your suddenly obedient black and grey cocker spaniel. "Bye Niall."

"Bye Alex."

You weren't quite sure how you managed to walk across the Common without looking behind you. The pull you felt towards Niall was still there, even though he had ghosted you these last few weeks. 

When he had left your flat that day you had instantly called your best friend Charlotte to tell her what had happened. She hadn't been able to stop laughing at the thought of you making a fool of yourself when you fell over Monty's lead. She was also the person you had told about your texting over the weeks with him and she was also the one who had listened to you moan about him not replying to you.

As soon as you walked in the living room back at your flat you made yourself a coffee and decided to call her. Charlotte was always the voice of reason.

"Hi Alex."

"Hi Char. Got a minute?"

"Yeah, of course. What's wrong?"

"Nothings wrong. Um Niall text me this morning."

"And?!"

"He asked me what I was up to and I said I was off to walk Monty."

"Oh so you replied, I really thought your stubborn arse would ignore him."

"Didn't have the heart to ignore him to be honest."

"So what did he reply?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?! What an arsehole!"

"He came to the Common to find me instead."

 "Really?! What a fucking sweetheart!" 

"He was an arsehole a second ago!" You cried down the phone.

"Yeah, well coming to meet you in the park is super romantic! So what did he say when he came over to you?!" She said a little bit too excited.

"He asked me if I was free as he had the weekend off and wanted to hang out."

"So are you hanging out later? Are you ringing for dating advice because I'm not sure I'm qualified any more. Luke and I have been together for five years now."

"I told him I was busy." You mumbled.

"What the ...... fuck?! What? Why would you do that?!"

"Because he's been ignoring me for two weeks and then just shows up?!"

"Alexandra Fellows...... What the fuck am I going to do with you?! Niall Horan just asked you to hang out with him and you told him you were busy!!! BUSY! FUCKING BUSY!"

"Stop shouting woman!"

"He saw you fall over Monty's dog lead and twist your ankle like an idiot and yet he still helped you home and asked for your number!"

"But he's been ghosting me." You said trying to justify why you blew him off.

"He's a worldwide famous musician Alex, he's a busy guy. Luke said he also does something with golf too."

"So you think I should just accept that he ghosted me?!"

"Not accept it but just get past it. Come on, he came to meet you to ask you out."

"I don't think it was for a date, just to hang out."

"It was for a date." You heard Lewis say.

"Am I on speaker phone?!"

"Yep!" You heard them both answer.

"Oh god! Are you in bed?! Did I interrupt something?!" You asked.

"Yes we are in bed, but no you didn't interrupt anything." Charlotte replied. "We are just having a lie in. Some people sleep in at the weekend Alex."

"Well some people don't have a crazy arse cocker spaniel like Monty!" 

"Look Alex, just text him and say something like it looks like you'll be free later. That way you don't look stupid by saying you were busy today." She said.

"And text us and let us know what he says." Luke chipped in.

"Ok, I will. I can do this."

"Yeah you can!" Charlotte said a bit too enthusiastically.

"Ok, love you guys. Speak to you later."

"Love you to!" They both said in unison.

"Oh and don't say anything to anyone."

"We won't."

You ended the call and took a deep breath.

If you called him now it would be obvious you had lied about being busy and would look a little desperate. So you made yourself a coffee and began tidying up your flat. You cleaned the bathroom, put on a load of washing on and hovered through out. Monty had moved around the flat avoiding you as you worked, he just wanted to snooze without being interrupted.

The rain lashing against the window was loud as you stood in the kitchen composing your text. Deleting it for the third time you contemplated calling him instead. You were interrupted by the doorbell ringing, Monty didn't even bother to move. That was until he heard Niall's voice when you answered the door.

Niall was stood in the doorway of your flat, he'd clearly walked to yours as he was soaked from the rain. He pulled off his wet hat and ran his fingers through his hair. You felt the heat rise on your cheeks at his actions and knew he would notice.

"I'm sorry for being a dick." He blurted out.

"What....what are you talking about?"

"I know the reason you didn't want to hang out with me today was because I haven't message you in a few weeks. My cousin told me I was a dick and that I should apologise."

"Niall it's fine, honestly. I just had loads of stuff to do that's all."

"No, I could tell it was an excuse straight away but it took my cousin telling me what I'd done wrong for me to realise. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to just not text or anything. I'm not even sure why I didn't, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since I first saw you in the pub that afternoon."

You stood there in silence at his confession.

"Um do you um want to come in and dry off?" You managed to ask him.

He breathed a sigh of relief and moved to step over the threshold. Pressing you up against the wall his lips met yours and you didn't hesitate to kiss him back. 

"I'm sorry, truly I am." He whispered against your lips.

Tag list

@ihearthemcallingforyou​

[clifford5sosx]

5SOS Chat

Who:  The 5SOS Boys

What: Being themselves

Where:  A Hotel in LA

When: Aug 3, 2020

Rating:  Let’s give it a PG-13 for language and sex references

@famelukehemmings, @calumshoodstf, @latenightdemons

Ashton: Knock knock.

Calum: no ash

Ashton: I regret writing a song about you right now.

Luke: What did I just walk into

Ashton: Knock knock.

Luke: No Ashton

Ashton: I didn't write a song about you

Luke: Okay and?

Ashton: ???? Well I couldn't say I regretted writing one so I went with that.

Calum: you wrote a song for me??

Calum: it was best years, wasn’t it? you guys, you shouldn’t have

Luke: Shut up Calum

Ashton: Calum, please picture my eye roll.

Calum: ew don’t make me do that

Ashton: Mikey is about to be my favorite.

Luke: HEY

Calum: mikey is mine ash

Calum: malum all the way

Ashton: 🙄 fair.

Ashton: Shut up, Like. You've always been my favorite.

Ashton: Luke too.

Calum: Is like luke’s evil twin brother?

Ashton: Oh god.

Ashton: I don't need two of them.

Luke: I'll give you two of me out of fucking spite now

Luke: Trying to trade my ass in for Mikey

Calum: All mikey does is play video games, he’s the least problematic of us all

Ashton: I wasn't trading the ass, I was reading the whole human.

Luke: Fine! I'll trade you in for another Drummer

Ashton: You act like I could trade you actually.

Luke: It wouldn't stop you from trying

Ashton: .......

Luke: Yeah that's what I thought

Ashton: 🙄

Luke: Did you just roll your eyes at me?

Ashton: I did. Gonna do something about it?

Luke: You are so lucky I love you

Ashton: 🙄

Luke: Slowly that love is turning to hatred

Ashton: Is it?

Luke: Yes it is

Ashton: I don't even know what love is.

Luke: Well that’s a depressing thought

Calum: could you guys not

Ashton: Not what?

Ashton: Sometimes thoughts are depressing.

Luke: I'm aware of how depressing thoughts can be.

Ashton: I was also joking. I love my drums.

Luke: Your drums don't count they're inatimate

Ashton: Just break my heart, why don't you?

Luke: I would never break your heart!

Ashton: 🤔

Calum: yes he would

Luke: I would not!

Calum: I know, I know.

Mikey: Boys, what are you doing?  And who is breaking who?

Luke: No one is breaking anyone!

Mikey: What?  I was looking forward to some action.  Damn.

Luke: Well you've come to the wrong place

Mikey: What about Ashton's heart?

Luke: He said I was breaking his heart because he loves his drums and I told him that his drum don't count because they're inatimate

Ashton: He's breaking my heart.

Mikey: For him, that counts.

Calum: Ladies please

Luke: IM NOT BREAKING YOUR HEART

Mikey: I don't think he's had a real relationship since.... shit

Ashton: It's BROKEN.

Luke: I'm just gonna shut up now

Ashton: ..........I've had more fuck buddies then actual partners, yes. You're correct.

Luke: I don't want to hear about all your fuck buddies

Calum: I’m almost to the hotel, put on your happy face because I know you fuckers have missed me.

Mikey: I hope you aren't talking about drumsticks

Luke: I'll get right on that Calum

Mikey: Any word on our housing situation.  Do we get a beach house or what?

Ashton: Ew Michael.

Ashton: Why not, Luke?

Ashton: What's a happy face.

Luke: I'm working on it, I have to talk to Harry about it but I'm sure the offer is still on the table

Calum: Yes, let’s get a fucking beach house!

Calum: Please, I wanna play bass shirtless in the sunset while the waves are crashing

Ashton: A beach house.

Mikey: For us, it better be.  I'm gonna sit out on the beach at sunset and get shitfaced.

Calum: Yes. This will be fun ash

Ashton: I'm terrified

Luke: Listen I felt pressuered into doing this! The house was supposed to be mine not for all of us

Luke: But I love you all so why not

Ashton: I just kind of nod my head and agree.

Luke: Well if it brings us all together again I'm okay with it

Mikey: Plus there is Ashton's heart

Ashton: What about my heart.

Ashton: Awww Luke misses us.

Luke: What about his heart?

Luke: Shut up, Ashton

Ashton: Make me.

Luke: I'll pass

Ashton: 🙄

Luke: Why are you always rolling your eyes at me?

Mikey: I'm not

Mikey: I'm just saying

Luke: I think I should second guess actually living with the three of you

Ashton: My heart????? What about my heart?

Ashton: .........because rolling my eyes is fun.

Luke: I don't know! It was Mikey! I don't even think he knows what he was talking about

Ashton: 🤣

Ashton: I'm teaching myself tiktok dances.

Luke: Half the time I don't even know what he's talking about

Luke: NO

Luke: NO NO NO! You will not fall victim to that!

Ashton: ....But I look good.

Luke: I-

Luke: No comment

Mikey: His arms are big.

Mikey: Again - just saying.

Mikey: I'm also a great roommate

Mikey: Cal is too, and what will he do without us

Luke: I've noticed how big his arms are

Ashton: There's one that's like "come and fuck my life up" and then you push the camera down. And I'm kind of amused by it.

Ashton: Mikey has a point.

Mikey: Mikey - who, what?

Ashton: I said you had a pooooint.

Luke: See he doesn't even know what he talks about

Mikey: Yeah, that's what I thought.  Just checking.

Luke: You had a point Mikey

Ashton: 🤣

Ashton: Also it's nice to know "I look good" gets a no comment

Luke: I said no comment

Luke: Thats kinda a comment

Mikey: I said your arms were big and Luke agreed

Luke: No one wants my comment trust me on this

Mikey: I'm not sure I want to guess at that comment

Luke: No Mikey you don't

Ashton: I'm curious.

Luke: No Ashton, you're not

Ashton: 👀

Luke: You're not, Irwin

Ashton: 👀

Luke: Stop giving me those eyes!

Ashton: 👀👀

Luke: Ashton Fletcher Irwin!

Ashton: Yes?

Luke: Stop it

Ashton: But.

Luke: but what? there's no buts

Ashton: I have a butt.

Luke: Yes yes you do

Ashton: ......

Luke: Okay time to change the subject

Ashton: I'm learning a lot.

Mikey: Do you guys want to share a room?

Ashton: What.

Mikey: Also, what about Luke?  He's really tall, knows how to dress.

Ashton: He's basically a bean stalk with a good fashion sense.

Luke: Shut the fuck up, Clifford

Luke: Well gee thanks

Ashton: Was a compliment.

Luke: Calling me a bean stalk is not a compliment

Mikey: He's filled out a bit.  Five years ago he was a beanstalk.

Mikey: I'm just helping.

Ashton: Helping...?

Luke: Mikey, Mikey darling just stop

Mikey: I'm helping.  Come on, Ash, it's your turn.

Ashton: You've gotta tell me what you're helping with.

Ashton: Because what am I taking a turn on?!

Mikey: Okay what about him turns you on?

Luke: MICHAEL GORDON CLIFFORD

Luke: WE ARE NOT DISCUSSING THIS

Ashton: I just choked.

Mikey: Why?  I'm helping.  That's Doctor Clifford to you.

Ashton: And I'm highly amused.

Luke: Helping with what?

Luke: I swear to god I am going to hurt you

Mikey: Ashton, you did not answer my question.

Ashton: 🤣

Ashton: I love seeing him sweat. This is amusimg

Luke: Mikey! Stop it!

Luke: Oh my god I'm trading this whole damn band in

Calum: Hey! What did I do!

Calum: I walk back in this chat and I see you’re trading us in?

Luke: Okay I'll keep Cal

Luke: But you two are gone

Ashton: Because Mikey's helping

Calum: Thank you 😍

Luke: HELPING WITH WHAT?!

Luke: Embarassing me?

Ashton: And I have no idea what he's helping with

Calum: In other news

Mikey: Luke, his answer is everything, he just doesn't want to say.

Ashton: Calum.

Luke: Mikey stop it OMG

Calum: I might be a bit late getting to the hotel, I have a stop to make

Ashton: Are you getting laid.

Mikey: MAKE WHAT

Luke: I dont need to know about anyone getting laid

Ashton: Also how am I embarrassing you?!

Calum: Wow ash, you read me like a book

Calum: It’ll literally be like five minutes

Ashton:.......Man. I hope it doesn't take five minutes.

Luke: Not you, Ash! Mikey

Calum: Mate

Luke: la la la la I can't hear any of this

Ashton: I love fucking with all of you. It's fun.

Mikey: Sure you can.  He's behind you staring at you all night.

Luke: jackass

Calum: It’s been a hot minute, so I gotta do what I gotta do.

Calum: Text you all soon

Luke: MICHAEL STOP OH MY GOD

Calum: 😍

Mikey: Cal, you sound like you gotta piss, not fuck

Calum: Jesus mate, what do you want me to say??

Calum: I’m about to go to pound town on a girl I hardly know??

Calum: Luke is going to literally die of embarrassment

Mikey: I know what you meant, but never say it'll just take a minute

Mikey: Unless it will just take a minute

Mikey: and that is a little sad.

Calum: No, idk. I don’t know her.

Ashton: I'm crying.

Calum: Literally tinder over here is nuts

Calum: Aussie girls are hard to get but American girls??

Mikey: Sex first then you can get to know her.

Calum: EXACTLY

Mikey: See, Mikey solves everything

Ashton: ....this is the first thing you've solved all night.

Calum: Oh what the fuck

Calum: She dipped

Mikey: I'm working on the rest.  I think you and Luke should share a room

Luke: No Michael

Ashton: Why?

Luke: Did Calum get stood up?

Calum: I did... what the fuck man

Luke: Lets focus on that, K Mikey?

Luke: Focus on Cal

Calum: No, it’s fine. Damnit.

Calum: Okay, alright, I’m heading to the hotel now.

Ashton: Michael, answer me and then we focus on Cal.

Mikey: Wait, what?

Luke: Fuck

Calum: Let’s all just regroup. I’m hugging all of you as soon as I see you all.

Mikey: How?  Were you supposed to meet her?

Calum: Yes.

Calum: And she backed out.

Calum: I’m not mad

Ashton: She's a dumb shit.

Mikey: Oh shit, what was she doing instead?

Calum: Right? I’m a stud. How could anyone resist these curls?

Calum: Or

Mikey: curls?

Luke: Dude maybe she got nervous

Ashton: You're adorable.

Luke: And where tf do you have curls?!

Calum: Yeah, idk where curls came from

Calum: I used to have curls

Ashton: 🤣

Calum: Should I bring them back?

Luke: I have curls

Luke: NO

Ashton: Yes you should.

Luke: Thats my thing now

Calum: Remember that poll I did on Twitter

Calum: And I said no curls

Calum: Well

Calum: Now I’m gonna put a new one up

Ashton: 🤣

[tenaciousarcadeexpert]

Criminal Minds-The Good Ol Days

Chapter 9-Betrayal

Tagging: @marvelfanlife​, @itsmeedee​, @cynbx​, @jaqren​, @gabriellewritermua​, @princesswagger16​, @screaminginbi​, @tleighstone12​, @cosmicmelaninflower​, @ssadavieboy​

A collaboration fic with @princesswagger16

   The last two chapters may be bad, but this one gets worse. Be warned, more terrible things are happening.

  Elsewhere, Rossi was with the BAU agents, examining Stephen’s car. Nothing so far pointed them in the direction of something new.

“What do we got?” Rossi asked Agent Branch as they analyzed the wrecked car.

“Well, the damage seemed pretty extensive, but there’s no way he could have done this deliberately. According to medical reports, there was no signs of foul play, no drugs nor alcohol.” “We did, however, found this.” Agent Skye hands both Rossi and Powell a folder and a larger ziplock bag.

“Is that the…” “The brakes. According to the mechanics,they found some of the assembly bolts missing and I compared them to the ones that we found at the scene. They match.” “Are you saying that..” “Someone planned this, they knew Stephen would leave. We just need to figure out who it was and why?” “Well, we could always check the cctv footage from the parking lot, see who was there before Stephen arrived at the parking lot. What do you think Dave?”

Just then, Rossi hears his phone buzzing and pulls it out from his pocket. He then turned it on to see a notification from one of his former students.

Hey professor, it’s Derek. We found something, something big. Meet us at the classroom, room M208, it's really important.

"What's wrong Dave?"

"I uh, I'm sorry but." He puts his phone away. "Something came up at the campus."

"Want us to go with you?"

"Nah, this won't take long. I'll meet up with you guys at the precinct." He pats his fellow friends on the shoulder before heading out. 

                                           _________________ 

   At the Language department, Reid, Marissa and Kate were looking through some old news articles and photos that Blake retrieved.

"So that's who the Replicator was." Reid murmured while staring at the photo.

"His real name was John Curtis. He used to be a professor in this campus." 

"What subject did he teach?"

"Biochemistry, though he would later move to Criminology. He was one of the most brilliant teachers in this campus, though he was bit……eccentric.”

Reid raised an eyebrow. “How so?” “He tends to ‘act up’ whenever something doesn’t go his way. To tell you the truth, he never actually appreciated his job, saying that it was ‘beneath him’.”

“What’s so bad about being a biochemistry teacher? It sounds like a fascinating subject.” “Yeah well Marissa, he never really wanted that position. It was given to him because of his past experience. What he really wanted was a position for a criminology professor, he had an impulsive fascination for the study of the social and behavioral sciences behind criminal behavior and so on.” “How come he didn’t get the job?” Kate asked. “Well, by the time he applied, almost all of the positions were filled up, but mostly because the school found someone else who was more qualified for the job.” “Lemme guess, Rossi was the one who got it.” Blake nods. “Mm hmph, Curtis didn’t take the rejection well and expressed his resentment towards Rossi for the rest of the year.” “Damn, that’s so petty.” “Yeah well, it also didn’t help that some of Rossi’s students were formerly Curtis’s.” “Oh.” “Yeah, Curtis felt betrayed, accusing Rossi of taking everything that he holds dear and vowed to punish him for it.” “All for what, a teacher’s job? That’s stupid.” “Well, you don’t know him like how Rossi and I did. I knew something was up one day and when I tried to do something……..it’s was too late. That’s when it happened, and those students…….those poor students………..the campus had to close down for a while. Took them almost a year to recover, but still….the pain remains. Rossi loved those students as much as if they were his own and even with Curtis gone, it was never gonna bring them back.”  

“How did The Replicator/Curtis died?” Blake took a deep breath. “Eventually, the police surround him outside the campus. Rossi tried to convince him to surrender, but he refused and the cops opened fire.” She rubbed her eyes. “And that was it……..” “Except.” “Curtis left behind a wife and son…….Everett was his name. When news broke out about his father, you’d be surprised to see how much a person can change at the blink of an eye.” “He wanted revenge?” She nods, “Something like that. He said that as long as he was alive, he will never rest until he finds justice for his father’s killer.” “But that’s not fair, Rossi didn’t kill him, the cops did. If anyone should be to blame, it’s Curtis.” Kate complained.

“Well he doesn’t understand that, he was too full of rage and narcissistic like his own father. Since then, he was arrested several times for minor, unrelated crimes and even tried to stalk Rossi. Then later on, he…...vanished, went off the grid somehow. No one has seen him since, not even his own mother. But Rossi sensed that he was just finding the right time to attack, and considering all of the things that’s been happening, from Gideon’s death to Stephen’s accident, this is just the beginning and god forbid what his endgame could possibly be.” 

“What do you think his endgame could be?” Before Blake could answer, Reid, Marissa and Kate heard the sounds of their phones buzzing as they pull them out to see that they all received the same message from Derek.

“What’s wrong?”

“Derek found something, he wants all of us room M208 now.”

“Oh, I understand. We can finish this up later, you guys go ahead.”

“Are you sure you wouldn’t like to come with us? Maybe a set of fresh eyes could help.”

“Uhm I….” “Please? I’d appreciate if you come with us, plus we need a teacher we could trust so….”

“Okay, just let me grab a few things.” She says as she packs her bag.

                                      -------------------------------------

 Elsewhere, the group gathered at room M208, the same place they all met when Rossi took them on their special trip, where they ponder over the new evidence Derek could possibly have.

“You know, if Derek wanted all of us to meet, we would have expected him to be here right now. What’s taking him so long?” Elle asked.

“I don’t know.” Hotch responded

“Maybe he got caught up with something? Or maybe he’s trying to get some sort of physical evidence over here?” Garcia shrugged her shoulders.

“Hey guys.” Reid greets the gang as he, Marissa and Kate arrived. “And Professor Blake is with us too.” “Afternoon students.” “Afternoon.” “Where’s Derek?” Kate asked. “I don’t know, apparently he and the other guys are late as well. Did any of you see them?” Emily asked.

“Nope, since Derek called us here you would think he’d be the one waiting on us.”

“Well, we can share with you some of the things we got from Professor Blak-” “Hold up Reid, maybe this can wait.” Hotch responds as he and the others see Derek enter the classroom, though they noticed that Matt wasn’t looking so good and Luke looked really mad and sad.

“Derek, what the hell happened to you guys?” JJ asked.

“Why don’t you ask Matt, although you may not get an answer. Trust me, we tried.”

“What do you mean?” Just then, Derek tossed the book on a table as the group and Blake gathered to see what the guys found. “Is that?” “Rossi’s journal.” Blake said as she picked it up. “How did this happen to fall into your hands?” 

“I’ll tell you guys the same way i told Derek and Luke. I DON’T FUCKING KNOW!”

“That doesn’t explain why it was in YOUR bag.” Derek glares at Matt while the rest of the gang pass the journal around to see if it was really Rossi’s. “So stop lying to us.” “Is that true Matt, was this journal happen to be in your bag?” Emily asked him.

“Yes it was, but I don't  have any idea how it got there. Or who put it there. I swear, that journal wasn’t even in my bag when I went to the gym.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “Oh stop with this bullshit, Matt.”

“Shut the hell up Derek!” Matt turned to Emily. “Please Em, believe me, I-” “I’m sorry Matt, but this seems pretty suspicious.” “Oh come on, I-” Before Matt could answer, he looked to see his friends muttering amongst each other.

“You guys! You all believe me right?” They were unsure about what to do next, though Matt noticed Kate giving him a blank stare as she hands the journal to JJ. “Uh Kate? Y-” Just when JJ was about to tap her friend on the shoulder, Kate slowly marched up to Matt, while Derek and Luke moved to the side. “Kate-” Just then, she swung her arm as she slapped him hard on the face, causing him to stumble. The whole group and Blake gasped while Derek pressed his lips, trying not to laugh.

“YOU HURT STEPHEN! HOW DARE YOU!!” She yells as she repeatedly tries to hit Matt, only to get pulled away by Hotch and Elle.

“I DIDN’T DO IT!!”

“KATE YOU LITTLE BITCH!” Marissa stands up and strides over to Kate.

“What did you just call me?”

“You hear me bitch. How dare you hit Matt like that!? He didn’t do shit! How about you look at the details before you go hurting people for shit you ASSUME! It’s not fair to anyone. I know you’re worried about Stephen, we ALL are. But that doesn’t mean you get to play victim and hurt people. So step outside and cool off before I beat your ass in front of everyone. And that’s not a threat Kate, that’s a promise.”

“Shut the fuck up Marissa, you just joined our group and think you know more about Matt than we do. You don’t get to decide if he’s innocent or not so stop trying to think you’re in charge, cause you’re not.” Derek snaps at her.

“You shut the fuck up Mr. Eyebrows!! You don’t know if he was framed or not! Look at what they did to Stephen! They planned a car crash and then tried framing him! It could be the same people trying to turn us on each other you dipshit!” 

“Pfft, yeah right, you go ahead and find the real bad guy. I’m sure they’re around here somewhere.”

“Yeah, I will. Meanwhile, try not to blame innocent people for shit they didn’t do. I thought having a big ass head meant you had a big ass brain. But as we can ALL see, that’s not the case now, is it?”

“Why you-” “Derek no!” Reid stops him. “Please, can we not make this worse than it already is?” “Worse? Who’s side are you on?”

“N-no one, I believe in finding the truth.”

“Well, here’s your proof, Rossi’s journal went missing in his cabin, a page was found in Stephen’s car and the rest of the journal was found in Matt’s bag. Who’s the real suspect.” Derek then turned to Matt as he rubbed his face. “ 

“Okay dick tits, ask yourself this. How was Matt with us at the time of Stephen’s accident, but still there to plant the page in Stephen’s car? Unless Matt can teleport his ass there and back in 0.223 seconds, Matt had nothing to do with this.”

“Doesn’t matter, all Matt had to do was loosen the brakes. He could’ve taken the rest of the journal after the accident.”

“OH MY GOD! Are you really that desperate for a lead that you’re willing to throw basic LOGIC out the window??”

“Come on Marissa, stop defending this TRAITOR!” Kate yells. “For the last time, I did not cause Stephen’s accident nor stole Rossi’s journal.” “Matt.” Derek snickered. “Come on man, give it up. There’s 13 of us, only one of you.”

Matt sighs as he looks at everyone else, seeing that everyone else were starting to doubt. “G-guys, you don’t all think I’m capable of doing this? Do you? Tara?” “I-I want to believe you, but this is really suspicious.” She shook her head, along with Elle and Ashley.

“H-Hotch?” He croaked, now trying to rely on his roommate and the one person who often keeps the group in check. Matt’s eyes start to water.

“I-I.”

“No more crocodile tears now Matt.” Elle crossed her arms, interrupting Matt. “It’s over.”

“I see.” Matt wiped his eyes. “Seeing that I’m not wanted here, I guess it’s best that I’ll leave.” He turned to Marissa. “Marissa, thank you for sticking up for me. You didn’t have to, but you did.” “Of course Matt, but please, don’t leave.” “I’m sorry, but I have to.” “Matt-” 

“Please.” He then walks away, in a slow pace, feeling rejected and humiliated by his former friends.

“Bye traitor, we’ll never miss you.” He turned to see Ashley, mocking him with a subtle wave. 

Matt glares at her. “And to think that I saw you all as friends......but I guess I was wrong.”

“No Matt, apparently we were wrong to even trust you.” “Oh, so that’s how it is. Well fuck all of you.” “Matt-” JJ pleaded.

“No, JJ, I can’t. I can’t stay here anymore if this is how all of you see me, I just can’t. Goodbye.” “Well, at least try to be safe, okay?”

He paused for a moment, though as he sees through her blue eyes, he saw that she was really honest about him. “I will.”

He took another glance at his now former friends and sighs before marching out of the room.

JJ and Reid then look at each other knowing that Matt wasn't a traitor. They just needed evidence to prove Matt's innocence, much to some of their friends’ dismay.

“So that's it, we're all just gonna leave him like this?”

 “Hell yea! He's betrayed us all!”

“Yeah come on JJ, the evidence all points to him.”

“I don’t think so. I think we're missing something here guys.” 

“So this is really funny to me.” Marissa claps in a sarcastic manner. “You have the nerve to call Matt a traitor but you turned on him in less than a minute without any real hard evidence against him. You should be ashamed of yourselves.”

“Well, smartass. Got something in your mind?” Derek rolled his eyes.

 “Well dumbass, I say let’s put this to a vote.”

“Really a vote? What, like Matt goes to jail or we turn him in?” Elle glares at Marissa.

“I mean, what’s the point, Stephen is in a coma, and Matt has Rossi’s journal.” Ashley crossed her arms “I think we all know what our stance is.”

“I know what I’m gonna vote for.” Kate adds.

“Hotch.” JJ whispered. “Aren’t you gonna do something? This is getting out of hand.” 

Hotch takes a deep breath and walks in the center of the group. “Alright, alright, before this gets completely out of hand, I must say that I agree with Marissa in which maybe we should vote on it.”

“Are you fucking serious?” “Yes Morgan, I mean it and we all need to be fair, regardless of who it is.” He rolled his eyes “Fine.”

“Okay, so who agrees with Marissa and her theory that Matt is not the traitor?” Hotch looks up to see Reid, JJ, Tara and Marissa raise their hands, as well as he does, much to Derek’s dismay. “Okay….and who believes that Matt is a traitor and needs to be taken in?” At that point, Derek, Kate, Elle, Ashley and Emily raised their hands. “Damn.”

JJ tilt her head to see Luke hiding his hands in his pockets. “Luke, you seemed a bit lost.” 

“Yeah, I’d rather stay out of this, I prefer taking the middle ground.”

Blake then steps in, “I agree with Luke. I don’t want to be on one person’s side.”

“What about you Garcia?” Hotch asked her. Garcia rubbed her hands, seeing her friends being divided over a journal. 

“I-I” “Garcia?”

“Uhm…..I’m sorry, but I have to go with…. Marissa. She just has common sense and I agree with her argument!”

“Come on Garcia, not you too.” “I’m sorry, but it’s what I believe in.”

“Damn baby girl, I didn’t know you’d turn on me too.”

“Well Morgan, guys. The jig is up, Matt’s the victim, not the suspect all we need to do is investigate.”

“Well you all can do your own investigation, and we’ll do ours. We’ll see who comes out on top.”

In the middle of their debate on what to believe, they see Rossi walk in the room. "He-woah woah w o a h." He yelled, as everyone in the room froze and turned to see their professor standing right in front of them.

"Hello everyone, how are we today?”

“Hi professor........” They all froze.

Rossi raised an eyebrow. “Are you all okay? You seem a bit off.”

“Uh yea, why wouldn't we?” Kate shrugged her shoulders.

“Yea right, you guys are acting really weird.” He sat on top of the desk.

“Well, funny thing happened.” He placed his bag and jacket on the table. “I could’ve sworn I saw Matt stormed out of this room. Looked like he was in a really sour mood today.”

The rest of the team stayed silent, much to Rossi's dismay, though based on their body language, he knew that something happened and he wanted to know what they did to him.

“Will someone tell what the hell is going on?” 

[violetsmoak]

Pieces of April [13/?]

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21099044/chapters/50202530

Summary: On the anniversary of his death, Jason’s second life takes an abrupt new turn and he’s faced with a challenge that neither Batman nor the All-Caste prepared him for.

Rating: PG-13 (rating may change later)

Warning(s): Past Jason/Isabel, kidfic, minor canon character death (pretty sure you can guess who), I’ll add more warnings/tags as I think of them.

Canon-Compliance: Takes place in between the two RHATO series, so after Roy and Kori and before Artemis and Bizarro. Jason and Isabel Ardila were in a brief relationship.

First Chapter

________________________________________________________________

“Have you seen this?!” Damian explodes, stalking into Tim’s office with all the fury of a pit-bull wearing a thousand-dollar suit. His somewhat bruised face is red with fury as he slams of a piece of paper down on Tim’s desk.

“Did we have an appointment?” Tim asks lightly. “Because otherwise, I need to call an exorcist about a demon problem.”

“Stow your inappropriate humor, Drake, I just received a memo from our lawyers—”

“You received a memo? You don’t even work here officially. You were probably just sitting in B’s office pretending to do your homework and then snooped in his inbox when his back was turned.”

“A technicality that holds no bearing on this,” the boy sniffs, waving the paper again. “The patent office is denying Wayne Enterprises claim for the personal water filtration device we filed for on Tuesday.”

“What?” Tim demands, snatching the paper and glaring down at it; that was one of the projects he’s been overseeing the past few months. “On what grounds?”

“LexCorp apparently filed for a similar product 24 hours before we did.”

“Bullshit,” Tim snaps. “As of last month, they weren’t even out of the developmental stage on that.”

He knows because he’d been to the factory chasing down a lead on a completely unrelated case as Red Robin and happened to catch sight of their prototype. It was nowhere near the quality that Luke Fox already perfected in the Wayne tech division.

“Apparently someone’s been helping them out.”

“Any idea who?”

“I can ferret out the traitor soon enough, and make them see the error of their ways,” Damian says, smiling unpleasantly.

Which could mean anything from destroying their legal existence, or a personal beat-down by Robin depending on his mood.

“No,” he says. “We’ll figure out who did it, and why. Then we take it to Lucius.”

“I would imagine the motive for the deceit is rather self-evident.”

“It isn’t always. Motive colors everything. For all we know, it could be a blackmail situation. I wouldn’t put anything past LexCorp, or their R&D team.”

“And the issue of the patent itself?” Damian demands, folding his arms. “This company has invested significant capital in developing the product; if LexCorp retains the patent, our profit margins this quarter will tank.”

Tim smiles coolly. “They’ve invested a lot more than we did. Especially if they’re paying off a corporate spy. I’ll talk to Luke and his dad, but I think if we circulate the story we’re placing the design schematics online to ensure anyone in need can construct their own unofficial versions of it—for humanitarian and innovative reasons of course—LexCorp will take the worse hit and with the good press WE gets, we can recoup.”

“You don’t actually intend to follow through with that, do you?” Damian asks, nose wrinkled in distaste. “That reeks of compromise.”

“Of course we’ll follow through. With the prototype designs, not the final versions. Profit was never the main goal of that project anyhow, so we can afford a delay on returns. With the sudden influx of bootlegged versions of the technology, owning the patent will no longer be the challenge, it will be providing the most efficient and functional model. Which ours is, given the time we spent developing it.”

“So even if LexCorp releases their version, it will continue to underperform next to ours,” Damian realizes. He thinks about it for a moment and then nods. “That’s a semi-acceptable solution. Not enough justification for you to still be here, though.”

A brief, shining moment of an almost-compliment…and we’re back to that again.

“You know, if you’re so concerned that the team in San Francisco is bereft of management, you could always fly down yourself.”

“This is my city. I won’t leave it.” Which is the same argument he used last night; odd, considering Damian likes to be varied in his attacks on Tim. “Besides, we have all seen the results of the alternative.”

Meaning their short-lived team-up where everyone compared them to each other and Damian split.

Tim raises an eyebrow at that.

It almost sounds like he’s…upset about that. Funny, he’s never indicated he minded leaving the Titans when I came back. And half the time he’s off doing whatever it is he does with John.

“Well, maybe if you hadn’t been such a jerk to them, they wouldn’t have been so eager to see the back of you,” he points out, even as he immediately knows it’s the wrong thing to say. Damian’s expression, on the cusp of showing vulnerability, shuts down completely.

“I have learned it is futile to argue with stupidity, and that includes a preference for subpar leadership. Which you should be getting back to and cease wasting company time on whatever it is you don’t actually contribute here.”

Tim rolls his eyes, counts to ten in his head, and replies, “I have a case here, you know. I’m not leaving until that’s done. And maybe if you stopped being such an ass about it and just came out and asked, I’d be happy to call the team and suggest giving you another chance.”

“I don’t require your pity!”

“That’s not what—” Tim groans and pinches the bridge of his nose; why does every conversation with Damian that doesn’t include weapons, always go pear-shaped? “Are you and B fighting again? Is that what this is?”

“Of course not!”

Twin spots of red indicate that’s exactly what it is, and Tim groans internally.

Exactly when did I take over from Dick as chief soother of family problems?

Probably shortly after Dick “died” and went undercover with Spyral. Which he thinks is patently unfair, considering Cass is technically second-oldest, and Jason gives off more of that brother-vibe despite his abrasiveness.

Not that that’s particularly helpful now; he’s got his own problems to deal with.

And of anyone in the family, Tim’s the only one Damian interacts with almost as much as Dick, so maybe it’s not surprising.

Before he can ruminate any more on that, his phone buzzes; it’s from an unknown number, but Tim can guess who it’s coming from based on the first words in the text message.

- Hospital called. Tests positive…

There’s more to it, but Damian’s trying to read it upside down, so Tim snatches it up and reaches for his briefcase.

Apparently, the hospital put a rush on the paternity test results after all. Jason is probably freaking out right now.

 “We can continue this whole you-asking-for-help-but-not-really-thing tomorrow.”

“I’m not—that isn’t—you presume—” the kid splutters as Tim closes his laptop, before recovering and demanding, “Where are you going?”

“Picking up Ives at St. Camillus,” he lies with ease and mentally apologizes to his absent friend for using him as a cover. “He’s had a hard go of it, so we’re doing pizza and a Mission Impossible marathon.” He pretends to pause. “You’re welcome to come, but I’m telling you now we’re not ordering vegetarian or vegan pizza for you. It’s going to be a no vegetable zone.”

In the past few years he’s discovered the fastest way to get Damian to leave him alone is to welcome him to spend time with him. The kid is so set in his ways of insisting he loathes Tim that he’ll go out of his way to refuse such an invitation on principle, even in cases where Tim suspects he wouldn’t mind sticking around.

Tim thinks he has another year or two of that strategy working before Damian finally figures it out. Which could potentially be fun—he wonders what it would be like to have a younger brother that isn’t constantly trying to cut the knees out from under him—but for now, he really wants to avoid it.

Luckily, in this Damian remains predictable.

“I’d rather not stunt my growth like you,” the boy sneers.

Tim pretends that dig doesn’t irritate him, the way it has been since he noticed Damian catching up to him in height. The kid is smug about it and likes to rub it in. Tim, however, has learned the best way to circumvent that is to make a joke of it.

“I thought everyone assumed it was the energy drinks,” he grins.

“I’ll be sure to keep an eye out on your territory since you’ve decided to engage in an evening of sloth instead of important work,” Damian grumbles and stalks out of his office.

“So that’s a ‘no’ to pizza night?” Tim calls after him, fully aware of the answer.

“You’re a disgrace, Drake.”

“Make good choices!”

He allows himself a moment to bask in the satisfaction of ticking off the younger boy, before growing solemn again. He unlocks his phone to scan the whole message.

- Hospital called. Tests positive. Pickup tonight. Legal stuff figured out?

Tim shakes his head; Jason might as well be organizing a stakeout for all the details he’s given. It’s a typical Bruce-ism they’ve all adopted for when they are too overwhelmed to deal with something. He wonders if Jason’s even aware he’s doing it.

He quickly types out a reply—I’ll pick you up and we’ll go together. I have papers you need—and heads for the company garage.

He remembers the process from when Steph had her baby and signed the adoption papers, and so has ensured the documents the hospital will require are on-hand. Social security and medical history forms, birth certificates, driver’s license—a surface survey of identification to prove that Jason Ardila exists.

All Jason needs to do is memorize them on the drive over in case anyone decides to ask questions. Which they won’t, since the fact of Jason being the baby’s biological parent cuts down on a lot of paperwork for them, and Tim knows from personal experience that when it’s possible to avoid paperwork, most organizations do.

Inching back home through Gotham’s usual rush hour madness, Tim wonders if Jason will still be there when he gets to the apartment or if this is the point where he gives up and makes a run for it.

Halfway to the Nest, he gets another text from Jason, this one informing him he’s not at Tim’s place. A follow-up message lists an address Tim thinks he might have read recently, and it’s only when he gets home that he recognizes it from the file he read on Isabel.

Guess he decided to go out today after all.

He quickly changes from his business suit to something casual and unassuming, not wanting to draw attention if he goes into the hospital with Jason, and then hunts up the car seat from the piles of baby things Tam bought. Once that’s carefully installed into one of his less flashy cars, he heads out to the location Jason gave him.

He pulls up in front of a well-maintained condominium, and texts Jason about his arrival; though he knows he’s there, he’s still somewhat surprised when the older man materializes from behind the building, his face ashen and entire body pulled tight and tense.

As Jason gets into the car, Tim knows better than to ask him what’s wrong or if he’s alright.

Instead, he asks, “Have you eaten?”

Jason blinks at him like he’s speaking a foreign language, and then processes. “Not yet.”

Tim’s eyebrows go up at that because usually, it’s him that has to be reminded of eating; Jason’s one of those people that has to eat every three hours, or they become ornery.

He spares a moment to wonder where he picked up that bit of knowledge, and then suggests, “We can stop for food first if you want.” There’s a place on the Upper Eastside where Red Hood has been known to frequent. “We can take as long as you want.” 

“If I eat anything right now, I’m going to throw up,” Jason informs him. “I want to just get this over with.”

“Right.” He can understand that. “Okay, on that note—” Tim strains behind the seat, finagling the folder he stuck there with only the slightest pulled muscle, “—here.”

He hands Jason the folder of documents.

“These are all the official stuff they might ask you for, though I doubt we’ll need all of them today,” he explains. “I also included a list of social media sites you’re now registered on and tweaked your membership dates to exist retroactively, though that’s more for you and not the hospital.”

Jason makes a face. “You gave me a Facebook account.”

“Having one is almost more proof of your existence than having a passport these days,” Tim replies. “Which you still need to get, but we can hold off on that for a little longer. Everything here is just to throw off anyone from social services or the government if they decide to investigate you while we’re coming up with the long-term plan. And if we need an ironclad background, we can bring Oracle in on this.”

Jason’s expression becomes darker.

“Obviously I know you want that to be a last resort,” Tim says quickly. “But just keep in mind it’s an option. And O’s pretty good at keeping secrets from the rest of the family too, you know.”

The older man flips through the documents again and shakes his head. “This is pretty comprehensive considering the kid’s not hanging around here for long.”

“Trust me, if you want to get her out of the hospital, it’s going to have to be that comprehensive.”

It looks like Jason has a comment for that, probably about how he doesn’t want to take her from the hospital, but he visibly buries it and focusses on getting familiar with his new background.

The rest of the drive is silent and tense, and not for the first time Tim questions the wisdom in getting involved at all. Out of everyone in the family to help Jason through a tough emotional spot, Tim always considers himself the last resort; even Damian has more in common with Jason. On the other hand, with this particular scenario, maybe there is no right person to help.

Luck of the draw, I guess…

The tension in the car ratchets up tenfold as they pull into the hospital parking lot. Tim makes a judgment call to not simply drop Jason off on his own this time and even offers to carry the baby-carrier with him into the building, though Jason declines.

Probably needs something to do with his hands.

Tim feels a modicum of relief at that; the contraption is bulky and seems too big for the baby he held in his arms yesterday. Knowing him, he’d probably drop it and send Jason into a panic attack…

They head to the neonatal section in silence, and when they get there Tim’s the one who speaks to the receptionist. She hands him a clipboard with a bunch of release forms and waivers, then assures him the doctor will be with them shortly, before pointing them toward the waiting area.

Once seated, Tim divides up the forms and offers Jason a spare pen from his jacket pocket.

“This stuff’s all insurance and stuff,” he tells him. “I can fill them out for you.”

“I said I was going to handle it.”

“Did I say I was putting my information down on it?”

Jason scowls. “I hope you know how creepy it is you know so much about me.”

“Creepy, but useful,” Tim retorts and shoves a different form at Jason. “This is all family and medical stuff. That’s on you.”

“How generous,” Jason deadpans, though he takes the paper and reads through it.

Despite having the majority of the forms, Tim finishes long before Jason does. When he glances over to see what’s keeping him, he realizes that while everything else is filled out, he seems stuck on the name part of the questionnaire.

“You almost done?” he prompts, instead of asking if he’s alright.

Jason visibly shakes himself, jots something down on the paper, and practically shoves it back into Tim’s hands. “Yeah. All good.”

Tim glances at the form, noting that in a fit of inspiration, Jason has added Isabel as the child’s middle name.

As if expecting Tim to comment, he mutters, “Wherever she ends up, she should at least have a part of her mom.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

He takes the documents back to the receptionist to be copied and filed, before returning to sit with Jason.

“It’s a nice name,” he offers after a while. “Luisa Isabel.” He considers. “We can call her Isa. It works for both.”

“Shit. Jason blinks. “I didn’t think about that. Maybe it’s not too late to change it.”

“I wasn’t making fun, you know. It’s a decent nickname.”

Jason shoots him a sharp look. “What did I say about getting attached?”

“Why do you even care? Whoever ends up taking her might change it anyway.”

That comment makes Jason frown, as if he didn’t consider it, but if he has anything to reply, it’s cut off when a nurse appears and calls out Jason’s name.

“Right this way,” she beams at them, leading them to the hallway outside of an observation room; she promises to return in a moment.

Jason and Tim look inside, where there are rows of infants in clear cradles. The nurse stops in front of one of them—labeled Baby Ardila—and picks up the pink swaddled infant.

“Mr. Ardila,” a familiar voice interrupts, and they glance up as Dr. Kerry makes an appearance. He hesitates upon meeting Tim’s gaze, clearly wanting to keep to the privacy he requested yesterday. “Mr…”

“Draper,” Tim supplies smoothly, glad for the attempt.

“Right.” The man shakes his head and returns his attention to Jason. “As you’re aware, we did receive the tests back confirming the paternity. All that’s left is to release her into your custody, though I do have a few last-minute matters to discuss.”

“Sure,” Jason says tightly.

 “Don’t worry, there’s nothing wrong. She’s in excellent health,” the doctor assures them, as Jason fiddles with the baby carrier. He seems to be unsure if he should carry it by the handle or in his massive arms.

It would be kind of funny if he wasn’t so terrified.

“Her Apgar scores are perfect, she’s already had her Vitamin K injection and shots against Hepatitis B—all of which was arranged and signed off on before the birth,” he adds quickly, wary like he’s expecting them to rage at him for vaccinating the child.

“Good,” Jason says, probably because it’s one less thing to worry about.

Kerry appears relieved, and continues, “She’ll have a series of injections and boosters she’ll be needing, but her pediatrician will give you all of that information when you bring her for her check-up a week from now—" Kerry cuts himself off as if remembering the situation. “I can give you several referrals if you haven’t selected one yet.”

“Thank you, but that’s unnecessary,” Tim says. “We have a family physician.”

Kerry glances at Jason, as if unsure if he should be deferring that decision to Tim considering the kid’s paternity, but Jason nods. “I think that’s probably the only thing we for-sure have covered.”

Not entirely sure Leslie’s area is babies, but she’s still the only doctor worth trusting in this city. Jason knows it too.

“Very well,” the man says with a hint of doubt in his voice. He appears to debate with himself about something for a moment and then squares his shoulders. “We do have a social worker on-site if you change your mind about adoption.”

“No,” Jason says.

Kerry sighs. “Mr. Ardila, if you’ll pardon my input—you’re young. And given the circumstances, this is quite a shock. It’s admirable you want to do the right thing and step up to your responsibilities, but it would be remiss of me not to remind you to do what’s best for the child and yourself as well. If at any time you think you can’t do this, you have options. It’s better to figure out what you want to do now while she’s so young than once she’s had time to bond with you.”

Jason looks torn by either prospect, so Tim cuts in with a polite, “Thank you, doctor. We’re aware of our options. As you said, this has been quite a shock, and we have a lot do discuss. However, we would rather the baby not be left indefinitely in the hospital while we do that. I’m sure you understand.”

“Of course.” Kerry clears his throat, uncomfortable. “The attending nurse has a few papers to give you, commonly asked questions and the like. Just an overview of care for the next week or so, but if there’s any concern—anything at all—I’ve included my emergency phone number and email.”

“Thank you.”

He hesitates a further second, before excusing himself. There’s hardly any time to process that, before the nurse has returned, Luisa in her arms.

“Here she is,” she murmurs softly, almost a coo as she presents the baby to them.

When Jason hesitates a half-second too long, Tim immediately reaches out to pick up the swaddled infant. He may have done a little bit of research and YouTubing earlier to ensure a little more confidence when holding her.

Today, Luisa’s eyes are actually open—barely—though unfocussed. She has no reaction for Tim other than a slight scrunching of her nose and futile wriggle against the blankets keeping her wrapped like a baby burrito. Her skin’s blotchy and a bit greasy looking, and she still resembles a potato, though maybe a bit less wrinkled today.

Jason puts the carrier down, and while he appears intent on whatever the nurse is telling him—either congratulations or the infant care Kerry promised—Tim busies himself with figuring out how to put the infant in the carrier.

Does she really need that many straps and buckles to keep her in? It’s not like she’ll even have the coordination to escape for another two years…

Eventually, he manages it, however, and picks up the carrier by the handle; he sees now why Jason felt so awkward with it before, it doesn’t exactly feel convenient.

“…and that’s it,” the nurse is saying, while Jason nods.

I highly doubt that’s it.

He doesn’t say that out loud, though, if only for Jason’s sake; instead, he smiles and says, “Thanks for everything.”

“You take care now,” she admonishes. “The first week is hard on new parents.”

“No kidding,” Jason replies with a laugh that anyone else might call nervous, but which Tim recognizes as bordering hysteria.

Time to leave. “I’ve got no doubt we’ll manage. We’ve been in tougher situations.”

That seems to penetrate some of the panic the other man is working himself into. He blinks as if suddenly remembering who he is and how much they’ve survived.

“Yeah,” he agrees, a little shaky but surer. “We have.” He takes a deep breath, offers an actual attempt at a charming smile at the nurse, before turning to Tim. “We should get going.”

“We should.”

He still makes no move to take the carrier, but Tim doesn’t comment on it; he’s sure in the next days and weeks Jason will be easier around the baby. But right now, he’s not able to do it, and that’s the whole point to Tim being there.

They turn to leave, baby safely in her carrier between them; when the nurse calls out a parting, “Congratulations!”, Tim pretends he doesn’t notice Jason flinch.

⁂⁂⁂

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Next Chapter

[oscar-piastri]

lost soul [ben hardy x reader]

title: lost soul

pairing: ben hardy x reader

summary: ben helps the reader to move on after she got her heart broken. ben and reader are like 23 in this

words: 3.7k

taglist: @styles-charli

notes:  This has been in my drafts for a month. It’s very messy, but this is what happens in my head. Writing this is helping me to feel better and as I wrote that, I decided to throw away some stuff that reminded me of my crush, after he left me on read for the 29282 times. Every time I have a crush on someone new, I have all the memories hitting me in the face of how dumb I was and how heartbroken I still am after years.

masterlist

Feelings, memories, you wished it could all disappear as your eyes landed on a small piece of paper. It was lost in a box, almost torn but you knew what it was, as you remembered clearly what’s the story behind it.

It was a simple note, just the kind of notes you write to your classmate in class to communicate in a discreet way so your teacher wouldn’t see what was happening. You should throw it away, it was a useless thing to keep. But you heart and your mind couldn’t accept that, and you knew you’d keep it forever, only because he wrote it, more than 5 years ago.

He was your classmate and the closest friend you ever had. You fell in love pretty quickly, and you drowned even more in your feelings when he acted protective with you. For months you tried to tell yourself he was just your best friend, nothing more, but everytime he smiled, you knew it was love that you were feeling. And what broke you is that he never felt the same way. You moved away and you took that opportunity to forget about him; but it never worked.

Your phone rang, making you leave this state of nostalgia. The name of your best friend could be seen on the screen, making your curse when you remembered you were supposed to see her and some of her friends. Ever since you told her about this, she established a little tradition; going out once a week with her friends because “you need to move on”.

For a moment you thought it would be a great idea, but as weeks passed you realised it was useless. Your friend made her best to make it work, she introduced you to a friend of her boyfriend; Ben. Let’s say it, Ben is handsome, with beautiful vibrant eyes, he’s smart and funny, but it was just reminding you of your past and how your hopes got your heart to shatter.

God, if you weren’t obsessing over that stupid heartbreak, you’d probably be dating Ben by now. But everytime you think of more than just talking with Ben, you just think of your high school’s crush and just lose any confidence.

The sun was shining and meeting your friend at a park was a great idea, somehow the brightness provided by the sun made you better and happier. While your friend and her boyfriend Joe went for a walk just the two of them, around the park, you found yourself sitting alone with Ben. You felt good in his company but couldn’t help but hold back your feelings, sensing some doubts in your mind.

You felt Ben looking at you and you looked up from your phone to gently smile at him. You noticed he was about to speak and you put down your phone, so your whole attention was on the young man. “Y/N, uh… We’ve been hanging out together for months, and I’m starting to really like you. So.. Maybe instead of seeing each other with Joe and your friend. Maybe we could go on a date? Just the two of us?” Ben asked you, hesitantly. You blinked quite a few times, repeating his words in your head before you found the ability to speak.

To be fairly honest, you didn’t know what to say. “I don’t think I’m ready to see someone. It’s… Complicated” Complicated was the right words; you could be starting a new chapter with what seemed to be the perfect man, but you were still tied to the past, scared to believe in something that could never happen.

“Oh” Ben simply replied, and you could feel that he was disappointed. His cheeks were still rosy from his revelation and you couldn’t help but feel guilty about this situation, doing something that happened to you and fucked you up, this is not fair.

“It’s not you! It’s me… It’s really me! I have some love issues I’m trying to fix” you justified yourself right away. But it didn’t seem to make Ben feel any better.

“Never heard that one before” Ben mumbled, and you couldn’t help but have a flashback of the moment you found out the guy you liked had a girlfriend. You bit your lips, asking yourself whether you should give a better explanation to Ben.

“Do you remember your first love, Ben?” You finally asked, but you didn’t wait for him to answer “Because I remember mine. It’s a painful memory, but sadly, after 5 years, the memories are still haunting me, and I feel like I’m being stabbed in the heart all over again but I keep thinking about him. He was my best friend and to follow the cliché, I fell in love with him.” You told Ben the story, how you met him on the first day of school, how you became friends pretty quickly. Just telling his name; Luke to Ben made you feel a knife in your heart.

Of course, you couldn’t forget to mention that you used to share your lunch with him because his parents didn’t give him enough money, that you used to talk via notes during French class because he was always giving you great advices. On top of that, you ranted about how he was protecting you all the time; one you got hit by a water bottle someone threw and he got so mad he yelled at everyone. You didn’t leave the part where he was the shoulder you always cried on when you were on edge of breaking, because your parents and yourself were always fighting.

“He even played footsie with me, in class!” You continued, almost yelling. “No wonder why I got the wrong idea” you grunted, enraged at your own self. “He made me hope! He was flirty and my dumb ass thought he wanted to be with me! But I was wrong, he showed up with his new girlfriend and I realised I played myself” you couldn’t help be talking. At first you just wanted to explain the situation to Ben, but the more you talked, the more it brought back memories and the more you needed to let out everything. “I loved him and I thought he did too. In the end, he didn’t realise I was in love with him. What a dumb boy, everyone knew I loved him, it was so obvious”

Ben stayed silent the whole time, but he was staring at you and you knew he heard every word you said, he did exactly what you wanted him to do; just listening to you. But then, you looked at Ben and for a second, you didn’t see him, but instead you saw your old crush. You felt your heart beating way faster than usual. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have told you all of that. It was a mistake” you apologized, feeling the tears in your eyes that were ready to roll down your cheeks. You grabbed your bag and left in a hurry, not bothering to look at Ben one last time, as you let him alone in the park, totally unaware of what was happening.

When you got to your place, you threw your stuff on the ground and wandered towards the couch. You let yourself fall back on it, watching the ceiling and mentally cursing. You took your phone to text your friend, to let her know that you were back to your place, but unconsciously you opened the messenger app and scroll down until you found the conversation you had with Luke about two years ago. You remembered staying up until 3 am just talking, trying to help him choosing the right school for him but as you reread the text, you realised he only replied to be nice, clearly bothered by you messaging him.

Without realising it, you were now stalking his facebook page, trying to find him on instagram, and googling his name to have more information. Your heart dropped when you saw that he was dating someone. and you couldn’t stop the tears that were about to roll down your face. It shouldn’t be hurting you that much, but it does and there’s nothing you can do about it. You were relieved when someone knocked on your door, giving you the chance to move on from that just for a few minutes. You hurried to get up from the couch, and wiped the tears away before you opened the door, thinking you’d find your friend but you couldn’t hide the surprise when you noticed Ben was standing right in front of you.

“It looks like you weren’t expecting me, darling” he joked, putting a small smile on your face.

“N-no, I thought… I mean… How do you know I live here?” you asked, moving to the side so you could let Ben come inside. To be a polite host, you asked if he wanted to drink or eat anything but he declined and you moved to the living room.

“You left in such a hurry, I was worried about you. I texted your friend to get your address” he explained, sitting next to you on the couch.

“Thanks, that’s really sweet of you” you shyly replied, hiding your phone under some pillow to hide the fact that just two minutes ago, you were feeling miserable because of a dumb post on some social medias. But you weren’t great at getting rid of every evidence of your recent feelings, as Ben noticed your teary eyes

“Are you sure you’re okay Y/N?” Ben asked, placing his hands on yours, that were anxiously resting on your laps. “You seem...”

“I feel like I’m going crazy, Ben!” You sobbed, cutting him mid-sentence. Ben was quick to react, as he wrapped his arms around you in order to hug you.“ I want the pain to go away” you cried against his shoulder. “I want to erase those memories, but I can’t! I can’t stop my brain from thinking about him every time I feel lonely” you continued, your lips quivering. “I shouldn’t be thinking about him… I should be thinking of you… I really like you Ben” you confessed, nuzzling your face deeper in his shoulders.

“Y/N….” He whispered against your hair, his hands gently rubbing your back. He wanted to smile at the fact that you liked him, but you were feeling terrible, vulnerable and it made every inch of happiness in him fade away.

“I’m really sorry about earlier Ben” you muttered as he unwrapped his arms. “I know it’s dumb but I’m just scared to fall in love again, I don’t want to feel this pain again. I’m aware that you won’t necessarily hurt me, but I’m just scared of getting my heart broken. I still haven’t healed….” you confessed, feeling a sense of relief running through your veins. You did felt better, letting your emotions out.

You asked Ben to hang out a little bit longer. He texted your friend to let her know that you were feeling better, and he agreed to stay a few more hours, mostly because he wasn’t feeling like leaving you alone in your state. You ordered some food and watched dumb shows on the tv, but it all helped to cheer you up. It was only 9pm but you kept yawning, and even though it made Ben laugh, he decided to leave so you could have some rest. You escorted him to the door, where he gave you a small kiss on the forehead. “Call me if you need help”, he said and you nodded with a weak smile before he left. You went back to the couch, too tired to find your way back to bed, and collapsed on the pillows, falling asleep right away.

A few weeks happened since that day, and to be quite honest, spending time with Ben now that he was aware of your little issues, was easier than before and it made you believe you were in the right direction to finally move on from the past. You were taking things slow, hanging out as friends as long as you weren’t ready to try for more. You were doing great, counting the days where you didn’t go emotional about Luke, you were now able to see his profile picture on messenger without grunting or crying.

But a phone call from your sister crushed your hopes of doing better, when she announced that she randomly saw Luke and his girlfriend somewhere. You said nice words about him being happy while you felt your eyes watering. As soon as you hung up, you ran to your room and opened the box that contained your high school yearbook, where Luke wrote some notes inside.

You looked at his pictures and back at the notes, then back at the notes. You were completely zoning out after minutes, thinking of the day Luke told you he liked your hair down for the picture. And you listened and spent the following day with your hair down.

The loud knocks on your door made you come back to reality. You checked your phone to see a few texts from Ben, but also to realise that you completely lost track of time and wasted one hour. You mentally cursed when you realised that Ben was at your door, probably worried because you were late to movie night.

“It’s open” you announced, raising your voice so Ben could come inside. When he got in, he saw you sitting on the couch, a box of tissues next to you and the yearbook on your laps.

Ben’s eyes were wide open as he was quite surprised to find you like that. “Y/N, what are you doing?” He questioned a little bit worried.

“I don’t know what to do…. I know what I’m doing is toxic, holding on to those memories, it’s destroying me little by little… But I can’t control that” you replied, holding the book against your chest like your life was depending on it. “My dumb heart is controlling my mind and he makes sure that Luke is in my head non stop. But I swear I wanna forget about him, I just…. He’s no good for me, I’m well aware of that! I just wanna move on, but every time I take a step in the right direction, something is pushing me back and I’m stuck all over again.” you mumbled, your voice getting lower as the words come out of your mouth.

“It’s okay, love. I’m here” Ben said, offering once again his shoulder for you to cry on. He was sitting right next to you, and you were looking at him with puffy eyes, on the edge of crying again, but you bit your lips to make the tears go away, not wanting to show Ben how miserable you are. But what was making it more painful, was that the more time you spent with Ben, you realised he was the man of your dreams and that because of your obsession with Luke, you were gonna let an amazing relationship break, before it even happened. You shouldn’t let Ben put his love life on hold, waiting for you, when you know deep down that you’ll never get over the past, he deserved to be happy too, not wait years for something that might never happen.  

“You’re wasting your time with me! Waiting for me to get better, when you should be out dating other girls, who are ready to start a relationship” you blurred out, tightly squeezing the yearbook in your hands, making your knuckles go white from the strength you put in your act.

“No, I’m not” Ben replied right away, determined to put this dumb idea out of your head. “And I will wait as long as it takes, not because I wanna go on that date, but because you deserve to be free of the memories and let yourself move on” he continued, placing his hands on yours. Your grip soften at his touch and you eventually let go of the yearbook, dropping it back on your laps. Ben grabbed it and threw it on the ground, far away from your view, making you laugh, letting a smile appear on your face.

The two of you stayed silent for a few minutes, just looking at each other while you’re trying to make the sadness go away. But after minutes, Ben finally broke the silence that was weighting in the room. “This might sound stupid, because you already know that, but Y/N, you have to get rid of everything you own that reminds you of him.” He said, and you wished for a second that he never talked. You knew he was right, but it was still hard to hear. “The thought of him keeps dragging you down and you don’t deserve that. Let go, let go of the memories and allow yourself to find happiness and love, because you deserve to find love with the right person”

You listened to what he was saying, his last sentence echoing in your brain. Ben noticed you were chewing on your bottom lip, thinking about what he just said. He knew you might not listen to him, but it was important for him to try and help you, the best he could.

“I know we missed the screening, but we can still go out?” Ben suggested and you timidly nodded

“Some fresh air won’t hurt me” you concluded, before excusing yourself to get ready.

When you came home later that night, it was impossible for you to find some sleep. You kept tossing around in your bed, wondering if you were strong enough to get rid of everything. You didn’t know what to do: you wanted to destroy everything that reminded you of him but you also wanted to hold on to some of them, because it helped you feel better somehow. You finally decided to grab your phone at 3am, unlocking your phone and going straight to the facebook application.

You finally managed to sleep for like two hours. As soon as you woke up, you texted Ben, asking if you could meet for lunch. He didn’t reply right away, you were expecting that since it was just 7am and that he was probably gonna have a busy day. You went on with your day, checking your phone every minutes to see if he answered. You were over the moon when you saw his text, telling you to meet him after his rugby practice.

Sitting in the bleachers from the stadium where he was practising, you were waiting for him to leave the locker room so you could grab something to eat.

“I’m sorry you had to wait” Ben apologizing as he jogged towards you.

“I’m not the one who’s waiting for someone the most” you replied, giving him an apologizing look. Ben shut you off right away by telling you again that he was fine with waiting.

“By the way, I have another practice in half an hour, I don’t think we’ll have enough time to eat outside, so… I got us those” he explained, taking snacks out of his sport bag. “Vending machine didn’t had much choice, but I hope you’ll like some of those”

You both were eating, as Ben told you about his practice but you had to ask him to explain rugby because you were just a big stranger to this sport. But you knew it was an important thing in his life, and you felt like it was the right thing to know more about it. When it was your turn to talk about what you did this morning, you couldn’t help to feel excited.

“I deleted him from facebook!” you almost shouted because you couldn’t control how happy you were about this achievement. “I mean… I know it’s not something big, but I’m so fucking proud of myself”

“It’s okay Y/N, baby steps are still important” he reassured you. “And I am so proud of you” he continued before pulling you in a tight hug. You giggled when you felt his hair ticking your neck. For once in your life, you felt that things were finally moving for you and in the good way. And just like Ben said, baby steps are important.

You found yourself a few times wanting to see Luke pictures but instead, you always ended up on Ben’s facebook page. Things were going great with you, you loved every minutes you ever spent with him, and you knew for sure, that you’d never want Ben to be out of your life.

“What’s inside?” Ben asked as he walked inside your apartment, using his fingers to point the box you put on the table. You closed the door behind him and quickly followed him.

“Memories. I put pretty much everything I owned that reminded me of Luke: pictures, playlists, notes and stuff” you enumerated. “I’m ready to throw all of that away. I might just need help, like a mental support” you admitted, looking at Ben.

“You can count on me” he affirmed. “Hey, let’s do it now!” he suggested. He did not wait for you answer, he already grabbed the box and was halfway through the doorway. You hurried to grab your stuff and followed him.

Ben stopped at the nearest dumpster and when he found one, he gave you back the box.

“Do it when you’re ready” he reminded you, not wanting you to feel pressured to do it right now.

You actually waited a few minutes, you took this time to remember the happy moments you had with Luke. When you felt like you were finally ready, you threw the box in the trash, leaving your past and your memories behind. You were now more ready to move on and give a chance to Ben. You’ve never felt like this before, and you loved this feeling of being reborn, finally free of that terrible obsession and influence.

“Luke is my past, but you, you’re my future” you whispered, but Ben heard you and he interlocked your fingers with his before kissing your head softly.

[bards-witcher]

What if someone wrote a story for OhmToonz based around the song I know I’m a wolf by Young Heretics? Like Cartoonz would be the ‘wolf’ and Ohm would be the ‘rabbit’.

Okay so I listened to the song and read through people’s comments and there are some dark theories with the song which I decided to play on a bit XD.

Listen to the song here.

Warning: There is abuse/death in this so please don’t read it if it’s not your thing. 

Also, I don’t want to offend anyone with how I potentially treated issues in this fic, if I have grossly misrepresented something please tell me so I can fix it :)

.

[Ohm POV]

It was Tuesday evening, and like most evenings he had nothing special going on, so like normal he was lounging across his couch and trying to pay attention to the show playing on his TV, however, he’d long since lost attention in it and the plot was now far beyond his understanding.

As he was watching who he thinks is the suspect be interrogated, he hears a knock on the door, somewhat thankful for the distraction as he gets up off his couch to open his door.

He was expecting any one of friends to potentially drop by, maybe a neighbor asking if he had any eggs or sugar, but what he didn’t expect was to be looking up at his ex-boyfriend Luke, the same boyfriend who hadn’t hesitated to slap him around when he didn’t get what he wanted.

A spike of fear ran through him and immediately he tried to shut the door, only for Luke to step his foot in the way, keeping the door open no matter how hard he pushed against it in an effort to close it.

“I know I’m probably the last person you wanna see Ryan, but please can we just talk for a minute? I know I’ve been an asshole, and a bastard and every foul name under the sun but please can we just talk? I won’t try to come in I swear”

With a sigh he stopped his efforts in trying to shut the door, instead opening it slightly so that he could peer out, but that he could still somewhat shut the door if he had to, the hand behind the door pulling out his phone and putting 911 on speed dial just in case.

“Say what you want to say and leave, I want nothing to do with you” It hadn’t even been a minute and he could already feel tears burning behind his eyes, and it took all of his willpower not to let them fall.

“I want you back Ryan, I love-“

He couldn’t help his scoff as he tried to shut the door once again “You’ve got to be kidding me, Luke, did you honestly think I’d give you a second chance after what you did to me?”

“I know, I did the worst thing imaginable, and I hate myself for it more and more every day. There are no words to tell you how sorry I am for treatin’ you like that, but I’m better now, I-”

“Luke I want you to-“

“No please, just listen. Since you left me I’ve been a complete wreck, half the time I couldn’t bear to get up off the couch…”

“Oh, woe is you-”

“…But I realized how something was not…right with me. So, I sought help, I’m seeing a therapist, and I’ve got a stable job at a car shop, all that’s missing is you, Ryan.”

“You punched me in the face Luke, and for what? Because I didn’t clear your dishes?”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I had no idea what was goin’ through my mind, it was so so wrong of me to even think of layin’ a hand on you like that-“

“You broke my nose, Luke!” He tried not to let the visible wince from Luke affect his standing in the matter.

“Look, I’m not sayin’ we pick up where we left off or anything, but please, just give me a chance, the smallest chance you can so I can prove to you I’m different, that I’ve changed”

He let out a sigh as he rubbed at his eyes “Luke-“

“Please. Please, Ryan. Please, I know you still have feelings for me, just as I do for you, give me a chance to make things right, I’m beggin’ you”

Despite the part of his brain telling him to shut the door for good, to literally and figuratively close the door on this part of his life, he couldn’t deny the older man’s words. Despite his best efforts to put all of his anger and hatred towards the other man, he still loved him, still wishes he could wake up to version of Luke that had placed gentle kisses across his face to wake him up, and who’d be at his beck and call after a particularly stressful day of work.

He looked up at the taller man, trying to find any hint of a lie or malice, but all he found were the pleas of a desperate man, begging for anything he had to offer.

“One chance, you get one chance, or I’m gone. You so much as flick a finger at me then we’re done, for good, understood?”

He could see the relief wash over the man’s face and he allowed himself to feel the smallest spark of hope light up in his chest before they said their goodbyes, shutting the door behind him he fell to the floor questioning whether his choice was the right one.

**********

Things were tense at first, the first few times they met up he always made sure to have a friend with him and always made sure they were in a public place, just in case things were to go south, not that he expected Luke to be dumb enough to actually attack him in public.

Eventually, though, he gradually became more comfortable being around the older man, a few months after Luke had first turned up at his door and he was now inviting him over for dinner and to play some games, something that had been the norm for them back when things were good between them.

He feels some trepidation, in the beginning, making sure to tread carefully and to be aware should the older man's mood change at an instant, but no such change came. Instead, he found himself relaxing against the man next to him as the night wore on, laughing in a way he hadn’t for a very long time and genuinely having fun.

He allowed that little feeling of hope to grow when Luke offered to wash up the dishes, cleaning the kitchen as well, before saying his farewells. They were teenagers almost, standing shyly in his doorway as they determined what to say or do next, and he was slightly endeared by a blushing Luke who was trying to get out just how much he enjoyed tonight.

He leaned up to kiss the man’s cheek, noticing his blush get redder before they finally left each other for the night.

**********

Over the next couple of months, Luke started coming around to his more and more often, and it’s almost like the first time they were together, Luke devoted and willing to do anything and everything he could for him.

So, caught up in their ever-changing relationship that he paid no mind to the increasing pile of Lukes’ belongings making their way into his apartment, instead letting out a fond sigh before finding a place to put the item with the multitude of others.

Tonight, he and Luke are cuddled up together on the couch watching some show Brock had recommended to him, when in the corner of his eye he notices Luke swiping through his phone and tapping out a message, not long after the older man pried himself away from him as he made his way towards the door.

“Where are you going?”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll be back in about an hour, ‘kay”

“Luke, this is my only night off this week, you agreed to spend the night with me so unless it’s some kind of emergency-“

“I said it’s none of your business Ryan, so leave it” Just as Luke turned to leave he got up off the couch and ran after him.

“No, you don’t get to just leave without an explanation, so tell me what the hell is going on Luke”

Before he could blink he felt Luke slap him across the face, his face already burning hot from the impact as tears began to brim his eyes, all he could do was stare at the older man in shock before Luke seemed to come to his senses, apology quick on his lips.

“Ryan, I’m sor-“

“Get out”

“Ryan, please, I’m sorry I didn’t mean-“

“Get the fuck out now or I’m calling the police”

“Ryan, c’mon…“

He didn’t listen to what Luke had to say, instead turning his back on him as he headed towards the couch where his phone now lay, planning on going through with his threat, at least that was until strong arms wrap around him.

“Let go of me, Luke! I want you gone; I want you out. I never should’ve given you another chance” He only felt the arms around him get tighter, but with a well-aimed kick he was able to break free, quickly grabbing his phone before running towards his bedroom where he could lock himself inside.

However, just as he was closing the door, Luke came barrelling through it, a murderous look on his face as he wrestled the phone out of his hand and threw it across the room. He felt pure terror as he saw Luke stalk towards him, unable to stop the tears now streaming down his face as he begged Luke to leave.

Instead he felt a gentle hand come to rest on his cheek, thumb swiping along his cheek in an effort to get rid of some of the tears that had spilled, but he wanted to throw up, to smack the hand away, but it was his fear of the man in front of him that prevented him from doing so.

His breath got caught in his throat for a moment when said hand moved down the side of his face to rest against the bottom of his neck, and this time he did react, breaking himself away from the touch as he tried to move across to the other side of the room.

“Why couldn’t you be good Ryan? Why do you have to ask so many questions when it’s none of your business?”

“Luke, please…go, I don’t-“

He stopped when once again Luke stormed towards him, grabbing a hold of his neck and he clawed at the tight grip around it as he tried to breathe whatever air could.

“Why couldn’t you be happy? We were happy, weren’t we? I’ve tried so hard to be good for you but no matter what I do you always berate and snap at me”

He tried clawing, kicking anything he could to try and break the other man’s hold, but nothing worked, he could only plea on deaf ears as black spots started to appear across his vision.

“I love you so much Ryan, why can’t you see that? I’d do anything for you…”

He couldn’t hear the rest of what Luke wanted to say, a ringing in his hears getting louder as the darkness started to invade his vision, with the last of his energy he tried to scratch at the hand around his throat but still Luke took no notice of his peril, tears falling out of his eyes as he prayed for the wellbeing of his friends and family until there was no more breath to be had.

“..do you even love me Ry?” Luke looked at the man in front of him, failing to notice his limp frame and glazed over eyes as he shook him slightly, letting the man go so he could speak, only to watch in horror as he saw the smaller man's body crumple to the floor in front of him.

“Ryan? Nonononono, please no, you can’t-“ He collapsed onto the floor, moving the body so that he could try and attempt CPR, but it wasn’t too long before he realized that he was too late, the sight of the purple bruising around Ryan’s’ neck almost causing him to throw up. “Ryan, please. I’m so sorry, I love you, please don’t be dead. RYAN!”

He could only rest his head against the younger man’s chest as tears spilled out of him, pleading for Ryan to come back, but there was no answer, the only sound being his cries and apologies for the man he loved falling on deaf ears.

[highfivecalum]

The Bet {CH} 11

ooooof y’all get ready for this heartbreak

CLASS WAS a drag. It always was on Monday’s. You doodled all over the blank piece of paper that was supposed to be filled with notes. Your phone vibrated against your leg and you pulled it out of your back pocket to see who was texting you. You knew it wasn’t Peyton because she was in class as well and rarely ever used her phone in class and you knew it wasn’t Michael because he got drunk and dropped his phone in a puddle and broke it.

A smile made its way on your face when you saw the text was from Calum. You had talked and hung out nonstop since the night he slept at your house and you felt yourself falling for him harder. It was scary, sure, but you felt a little bit better about it since Calum liked you just as much as you liked him. Or that’s what you thought.

Cal: come over after class?

You quickly replied, letting him know that you would be over after class, and continued to text him for the rest of the class, which was only an hour. You packed up your stuff and shuffled out of the classroom and started the walk to Calum’s house. It was only ten minutes away from the building your class was in, and the weather was great, so you didn’t mind walking. He offered to pick you up, but you so nicely declined.

You texted Calum to let him know that you arrived at his house and knocked on the door, but no one answered and he didn’t text you back, so you turned the doorknob and let yourself inside. You had been to Calum’s house a handful of times so you didn’t think he would mind you letting yourself in. “Hello?” You called out and got no answer in return.

You walked up the stairs and turned the corner to Calum’s room, but stopped when you heard Calum and Ashton talking. About you. You had heard Calum say your name and you weren’t sure what he was talking about, or why he was talking about you, so you stood outside of his door and eavesdropped. You knew you shouldn’t have, but you couldn’t help yourself.

“I just- I don’t know Ash. This wasn’t supposed to happen.” You heard Calum sighed and you furrowed your eyebrows. What wasn’t supposed to happen? You continued to eavesdrop, not thinking it would harm anyone or anything, but you were wrong. “I wasn’t supposed to fall for her. This was just supposed to be a stupid bet and now, fuck, now I like her way too much.”

You pushed the door open completely to see Calum sitting on his bed and Ashton on the desk chair spinning around. They hadn’t noticed you yet so you made yourself known and braced yourself for what was to come. “I was a bet?” You barely whispered, your voice cracking in the process, and you cursed at yourself for crying. Calum’s head shot up from looking at the floor and his eyes widened when he saw you standing there. Your own eyes wide, jaw slack, and your eyes glossy.

“Y/N,” Calum jumped up from his bed and stalked over to you, but backed away, your shouldering hitting the doorway, before running down the stairs and out of his house. “Y/N, wait!” He followed you outside and grabbed your hand to stop you. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”

“Oh, really? I wasn’t supposed to hear?” You laughed humorlessly. “You don’t fucking say!”

“Please, just, let-let me explain. Please.” Calum begged. He would have dropped to his knees and begged for your forgiveness if that’s what it took to get you to listen to him. To let him at least explain. He didn’t expect you to forgive him, but he wanted you to give him a chance to explain.

“Explain what, Calum? I was a fucking bet! What else is there to explain?”

“I-”

“What exactly was the bet, Calum?” You asked. You were curious, honestly. You wanted to know everything, even if it hurt you even more, you just wanted to know. Calum gulped and stayed quiet, just staring at you and how distraught you looked. “What was the fucking bet?”

“I-It was- fuck, okay,” Calum stumbled over his words and you stood there, an expectant eyebrow raised as he tried to find the right words. “Ashton and Luke bet that I couldn’t get you to sleep with me in a month. If I lost I had to pay them two hundred dollars and if I won they paid me.”

“Two hundred dollars?” You scoffed. “That’s all I’m worth?” Your bottom lip quivered and you tried hard not to cry, but it was hard not to. Finding out the guy you were slowly starting to like more and more, almost love even, was only with you because of a bet really hurt. Who wouldn’t cry? “Is that all this was to you? All that I was to you? A bet?”

“What? No! Of course not.” Calum exclaimed. He didn’t blame you for thinking that, but he really, really wished that you didn’t. “Did you not hear me tell Ashton that I like you? After hanging out and being around you so much, I really fucking like you, Y/N.”

“Yeah, I heard you, but how the hell am I supposed to believe that? This whole thing, us, it was just a lie, a fucking bet, Calum!” You let the tears fall freely, not even caring about trying to be strong anymore, the realization hitting you much harder the more you said it and reminded him.

Calum was still holding onto your hand, hoping that you would stay, but when you yanked your arm out of his grip and furiously wiped the tears off of your cheeks, Calum knew that you weren’t going to stay. He knew that he fucked up beyond belief and he wished so badly that he could turn back time and prevent any of this from happening. “Y/N, please, don’t go. Please let me make this up to you.”

“There’s nothing to make up. It was a bet, a lie, and it wasn’t real. There’s nothing else to it, Calum.”

That was a lie. You knew it and he knew it. It was real to you, there was more to it, but you couldn’t admit that you had fallen for him so hard and so fast when the only reason he even talked to you in the first place was to get into your pants and win two hundred dollars. You were humiliated and the only thing you wanted to do was get away from the guy that made you feel that like.

“It was real, Y/N. You know it was real.” Calum pleaded. “It wasn’t just a bet for me. Well, it was at first- but now? Now it’s real.”

“Even if that was true; how do I know you’re not lying to my face? How am I supposed to trust you, Calum?” Your voice was stronger than you felt and you hoped that maybe, just maybe, Calum couldn’t see how badly you were hurt. Calum stayed silent because he knew you were right. How the fuck were you supposed to trust him after that? After finding out you were a bet? “That’s what I thought.”

Without another word from you or Calum, you stormed off, leaving Calum outside watching you walk away from him and walk out of his life. He knew he fucked up and he didn’t know how to fix it. He wasn’t sure he could.

You didn’t go to your apartment, instead going to Peyton’s dorm, since you needed your best friend. You didn’t cry the whole walk to her dorm, which you were proud about, but once she opened her door for you and you swung your arms around her shoulder, all the tears came falling down.

“What happened, Y/N/N? Why are you so upset? What’s going on?”

You pulled away and wiped your tears away, only just noticing that Luke was sat on Peyton’s bed in nothing but a pair of jeans. He looked at you, frowning when he saw you crying, and then all the guilt that he was pushing aside came forward. He knew you were crying because of Calum and because of the bet.

He wasn’t sure how he knew, he just had a feeling that was the reason.

“It was a bet.”

“What?”

“Me, Calum, everything. It was a fucking bet, Pey.” Your voice cracked again.

Peyton turned to Luke, who was looking guilty like one would expect, and she narrowed her eyes at him. She could have kicked his fucking ass. “Did you know about this, Luke?”

“I-uh. Yeah I did.” He admitted and Peyton’s blood boiled. “But it wasn’t my idea! It was Ashton’s idea.”

“I don’t give a fuck whose idea it was!” Peyton yelled at him. “You knew about it and you knew Y/N liked him and you just let it happen! You’re just as guilty even if it wasn’t your idea. Get out, Luke.”

“But Peyt-”

“Get the fuck out, Luke!” You had seen Peyton mad before, but this was a whole new level of mad for her, face red and eyes filled with fire, kind of mad. Nobody fucked with her friends, especially you, so it didn’t matter that she was actually starting to like Luke for more than just sex, if he was even just partly responsible for you getting hurt, she was going to kick his ass to the curb.

Luke got his clothes on and gathered his stuff, but before he left, he apologized to you. You didn’t accept it, and Luke didn’t expect you to, but he knew he needed to apologize, which you appreciated. You laid down on Peyton’s bed and exhaled a shaky sigh. You didn’t want to cry anymore, but you couldn’t help yourself.

“I can’t fucking believe him!” Peyton went on and on, calling Calum every name in the book, and paced across her room. You knew she was thinking of a way to get back at him, even though you didn’t want her to, but you knew she would. “And fucking Luke was in on it the whole time and didn’t say a word! What an asshole.”

“I know you like him, Pey.”

“I can’t like him! Not anymore, at least. I can’t like somebody who is friends with somebody that placed a fucking bet on you, Y/N! You’re my best friend that would be like, betraying you. Whatever Luke and I had, it’s just it’s over with.”

You didn’t bother arguing with her about it, you didn’t have the energy to argue, you just wanted her to play with your hair while you rested your head on her lap and cried, like you did every time you had a breakup or boy troubles. Peyton let you cry to her about Calum and she felt herself wanting to cry, too. She knew you liked him more than you had liked anybody before and she was sad because you were so sad and she hated seeing her best friend in the whole world sad over a guy that didn’t deserve you.

“I’m going to kick his fucking ass!” Michael shouted as he slammed Peyton’s door shut. You figured Peyton texted him to let him know what happened and you were glad she did so you didn’t have to. You opened your eyes to see him standing there with a frown on his face at the sight of you. Michael wasn’t one to fight, he hated physical contact like that, but he was willing to beat Calum’s ass for hurting you. You gave him a sad smile knowing that you wouldn’t be able to muster up a real one. Michael had actually gotten to liking Calum, he thought he was a cool guy and all, but after finding out what he did to you, he hated him.

“It’s okay, Mikey.” You mumbled even though you all knew that it wasn’t really okay.

“No it’s not okay!” Michael huffed and plopped down on Peyton’s bed. He lifted your legs up and let them rest in his lap and you felt a small, miniscule, smile tugging at your lips. You were glad you had two best friends that loved you and would drop what they were doing to come to your aid. With Peyton and Michael by your side, maybe losing Calum wouldn’t be so hard after all.

❀❀❀

Taglist: @babylonshood @mysticalhood @friendly-neighborhood-michelle @peyton5sauce @honeycombcal @my-world97 @lukesflaredpants @backstreetbarakat @tothemoonwithclifford @grreatgooglymoogly @therainydays4 @lukespenguin-97 @lifeakaharry @akacalciumhood @ashtxns-hxe @rexorangecouny @fivewachinessos @visioninwords @pancahke @monster-among-michael @calumhoodslays @wantirwinback @cartiercalum @sumlariss @calumsbabydolll @juliabrghs @shawnsbooties @whosash @insecuritieeseatmealive @ashtonwahs @hopelessxcynic @werealrighthough @trinitychico @ghostofhood @comingcalum @calistajs @sleepysavya

[lavieendonna]

What A Shame || l.h. (Part 3)

Requested: yes! Thank you to everyone who did xo Pairing: Luke Hemmings + Y/N  Word Count: just short of 2.4K  Summary: calum is butt hurt that this is not about him 

part 1 | part 2 | part 4 | part 5 |  masterlist | ask

You pulled your beanie closer over your ears as you passed through the doors to the supermarket, grabbing a red basket on your way through the entrance and looking from left to right as you tried to remember what you’d come here for.

It was late – almost ten – and your sweatpants were three days old, the green oversized hoodie you were wearing hiding a large, questionable stain on the front of your t-shirt underneath. This was the first venture out of the house you’d made in what felt like forever, and you huffed as you dragged your feet through the bakery section.

You couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened between you and Luke – the conversation seemed to have been loitering in your mind for weeks now. You couldn’t sleep, you were missing work and classes. There were just too many things that you could list off that you’d done wrong in all of the years that you’d known him that lead up to this. Too many things you could have done to stop it.

You picked up a packet of donuts and inspected it before putting it back, opting instead for a box of chocolate cookies that seemed a little more appetising. You were almost a zombie as you sauntered through the store, not really sure of what you were looking for but knowing you wanted more than to be so numb.

You weren’t sure how long it had been but you found yourself half-way through the store without even realising, staring at the confectionary shelves blankly and wondering if anything you bought would actually fill the void slowly, but surely, forming in your chest. You knew it wouldn’t, but there wasn’t a lot left to do.

You grumbled to yourself, choosing a packet of chips and some M&M’s and stalking out of the isle quickly. You were frustrated that this was affecting you so much. You were angry that you were hurting, and you were hurting because you were angry. And it was all because of a tall lanky piece of shit named Luke.

“Y/N?”

You looked up and some ways down the aisle Luke was standing awkwardly with a pack of V in one hand and what looked like two snickers bars and a jar of Nutella in the other.

“Y/N.” He said again, though it wasn’t a question this time. He looked shocked to find you here, and for some reason it felt better than it would have had he really been looking for you. But either way, you didn’t want to see him. You weren’t ready to see him.

You shifted uncomfortably under the gaze of baby blue eyes.

“Luke, I…” You cleared your throat, already taking multiple steps back. “I gotta go.”

You’d barely made the words out before you turned on your heel, ready to sprint out as fast as you could. You weren’t even planning on paying for anything in your basket, you were going to just dump it and go home.

But Luke didn’t follow you, he didn’t come after you – he didn’t even call your name one last time. He let you leave, and you felt like that was almost as bad as if you’d come to blow with him for a third time.

You fought with sleep night after night after that exchange. After only three days it felt like a distant memory, seeing Luke standing in the middle of a frozen food aisle and staring at you like there were more than a thousand words to be spoken. As always, he haunted your dreams. His eyes stared back at you every time your eyelids fluttered closed and more often than not you would wake up in a cold sweat, one second short of screaming bloody murder.

You sat up panting with sweat dripping down the back of your neck. You were tired of this – one more night of restless sleep and you were going to start hallucinating during the day as well. You knew how to fix it, too, but you had too many reasons why you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

You reached over to the bedside table, grabbing your phone and dialling the only number that came to mind.

“Y/N?” Calum’s voice rang though and you breathed a sigh of relief that it didn’t sound like you’d woken him up, even at two in the morning. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I…” You swallowed, squeezing your eyes shut and rubbing them with your free hand. “I mean, no.” You corrected yourself honestly. “Can you pick me up?”

“Yeah, ‘course.” Calum said with no hesitation. “I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

You hung up the phone, not feeling any better but not feeling any worse either. You sat there between damp covers, waiting anxiously for that knock on the door from Calum. You’d spent far too long trying to do this by yourself, you weren’t sure how to do that anymore.

Calum texted that he was outside so you slipped into a pair of combat boots, grabbing your phone and keys on the way. Calum got out to greet you, but you just opened the passenger’s side door and got in the car.

“Where do you want to go?” Calum asked quietly when he slid back inside the driver’s side, turning up the heater before taking off down the street. The music in the car was low but comforting. It was already a little easier to breathe.

“Just take me to yours.” You mumbled, sighing almost in relief as you rested your head back against the headrest, eyes closed. “I just needed to get out of the house.”

“What happened?” Calum asked. You bit your lip, wondering if it would be a wise idea to tell Calum that you were dreaming about Luke again or if there was a chance that would make things worse again. You just shrugged half-heartedly, turning your face to look out of the window.

“Is this about Luke?” Calum tried again, and you stiffened just a little, but with a quick glance out of the corner of your eye you knew that he’d noticed. His hands gripped the steering wheel in intervals, knuckles turning white and then flushing with colour every few seconds.

“I saw him.” You said simply and quietly. “The other day, at the supermarket.”

“Oh.” Calum hummed a little dumbly. “That.”

You frowned, a little taken back.

“You knew?” You looked over at Calum and he glanced at you quickly with sheepish eyes before looking back to the road.

“Yeah…” Calum seemed to flinch – or grimace, even. “Luke told me.”

“You’ve been talking to him?” You questioned further and Calum nodded again. “What’s he been saying?”

Calum grimaced again, seemingly unsure how to say whatever he was thinking. Your frown deepened and you found yourself – surprisingly – desperate to know.

“He’s just confused, Y/N.” Calum said, and you couldn’t tell if he was defending his friend or, perhaps, throwing him under the bus. “He wants you in his life but he just… he doesn’t understand what he did wrong. And until he figures that out maybe this – you twotogetherlike that just isn’t the right idea… I dunno…”

When Calum looked at you, for the first time in forever, you felt annoyed. Angry even. Because that didn’t sound like the kind of conclusion Luke would come to on his own. Sure, he looked shocked to see you back in the frozen food aisle, but he at least looked like there was still more conversation to be had with you and not like he’d already made up his mind to stay away.

“What don’t you know, Calum?” You kind of snapped unintentionally, though you had no intention of taking it back. “What, you don’t know if he’s good enough for me? Is that what this is about?”

“I… No, Y/N, that’s not –” Calum hesitated, stammering and unsure. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It sure sounds like you did.” You shot. “Is that really what Luke has been saying? Or are you putting words in his mouth? Because I really, really don’t have the energy or the patience or the heartto be fighting with you too.”

“I’m not trying to fight with you, Y/N, I just don’t think you’re thinking about this enough.”

“What elseis there to think about, exactly?” You snapped. “What is it that you think I’m doing wrong?”

“It’s not that you’re doing anything wrong, Y/N, I just think you’re both just –” Calum almost sounded like he was begging at this point, but all you could hear was Calum trying to insert himself into parts of this situation where you hadn’t asked him to be.

“Just what?!” You wailed. You were so confused, it seemed like one minute ago Calum was telling you to go and talk Luke to sort out what was going through your head and now he was telling you to stop and smell the flowers. It didn’t make sense – you thought Calum understood.

“You’re fucking scared!” Calum seemed to yell back, desperate for you to hear it. “You’re too scared to think about what would happen if that really iswhat Luke wants!”

You didn’t want to be angry with Calum but that was exactly where this was headed. He’d basically just admitted that Luke never said anything about wanting to pause whatever it was you two had, and you didn’t even know how to respond.

You took a deep breath and held your tongue. You didn’t want to lose Calum too by saying something you’d regret. Calum sighed, and you were fighting the urge to cry. Your bottom lip trembled but you held strong.

“Y/N, I care about you,” Calum said, his voice quiet and held back. “Maybe, even, more than I should. But I don’t want to see you get hurt again. Luke is my best friend, but that doesn’t make it okay for him to string you along and make you wait for the slightest chance he’s going to catch on to these feelings that you’ve had for God knows how long.”

You didn’t know that Calum felt so strongly about this, and if you did then you never would have called him.

“Can you just take me to Luke’s?” You asked and Calum’s face twisted with the knowledge that he shouldn’t have said that. The rest of the drive was quiet and full of regret. Calum pulled up outside of Luke’s place, and you paused as you reached for the door.

“I care about you too, Calum.” You told him over your shoulder. “But you can’t just decide this for us.”

You got out of the car and Calum sat there until you knocked on the door, only driving away when Luke swung the door open. Your brain was swimming with everything Calum had said, and Luke’s eyes were piercing straight into you with an expression you couldn’t quite place. Overwhelmed, you took shallow breaths to try and hide the shivering of your hands.

“Luke, I uh,” You cleared your throat, not having prepared a single thing you wanted to say. “If this is a bad time…?”

“No, it’s not.” Luke shook his head, almost immediately, and held the door open a little wider while gesturing you inside. “Come on, it’s cold out here.”

“Thanks…” You murmured, stepping inside the familiar house and feeling like a stranger.

It had been weeks since the last time you’d been, and though you recognised every picture frame and every mark on the wall, everything felt colder and less welcoming. You were out of place and you weren’t really sure where to stand, feeling like if you even breathed in the wrong way you might disrupt what little familiarity this place had left.

“If I’d known you were coming I would have cleaned up a little,” Luke started with small talk as he made his way into the living room and cleared off the sofa where he’d clearly been writing again. He had journals and sheet music all over the place, his guitar resting in its stand next to the coffee table. You just shrugged, pursing your lips.

“It’s okay,” You said. “I, uh. I didn’t really know I’d be coming either.”

Luke stood, hands filled with miscellaneous papers and pencils. You both stood at opposite ends of the room, just staring. Not an angry staring like before, but a confused staring. Cautious and careful, like whatever you two had left was hanging by a thread.

“Was that Calum who dropped you off?” Luke finally asked, and you nodded with flushed cheeks.

“Yeah, I uh,” You finally moved through the room and sat gently on one side of the sofa. Luke sat down on the other side, the space between you both seeming like miles. “I didn’t know who else to call. And he… he said some stuff to me that I just… I needed to clarify.”

Luke nodded, and for the first time in what felt like forever he was taking the time to really stop and listen to exactly what you were saying. It was intimidating, but it was what you’d wished he’d done in the beginning.

“Me too, actually.” He said softly, eyes flickering over to yours. “I guess we’re both still a little lost, huh?”

You let yourself scoff light-heartedly, the quiet laugh sounding foreign coming out of your mouth.

“Something like that.” You agreed but looked down to your fidgeting fingers. “I don’t suppose we can really blame anyone else, though. We did this to ourselves.”

“Yeah, we did.” He said. “Y/N…”

You looked up to meet Luke’s eyes, and you were surprised to find them looking more sad than anything else. There was so much emotion behind blue irises that you felt your chest tighten and your throat close in.

You missed Luke, you couldn’t deny it. But you were still hurt from the things he said and the way he treated you. You wanted things to go back to normal, but you knew they wouldn’t. They couldn’t, not while things were so far up in the air.

“What’s happening, Y/N?” Luke asked. “What’s happening to us?”

You grimaced. You wanted to say that you didn’t know, that this was just as confusing for you as it as for him. But it wasn’t, you knew exactly what was happening. But you didn’t know that it was going to hurt so much to bring it up.

“I’m tired.” You said carefully, and you refused to meet his stare when you said it. “I’m really, really tired… of trying to keep up with you.”

“What does that mean, Y/N?” Luke was almost begging now. “I thought… We’ve always been on the same page, I thought… I thought you were okay.”

You shook your head.

“You didn’t ask me if I was, Luke,” You said more sourly than intended. ��Youassumed I was okay. We were on the same page, and then things started going right with you and all of a sudden you took off without me. That… That girl showed up and I didn’t mean as much to you anymore.”

Luke was silent for way too long. You braced yourself, thinking maybe he’d blow up again and start yelling and screaming. You could barely hear yourself breathe, let alone Luke. You figured this was it, this was the end.

“So, this is about a girl.” Luke finally spoke, and he didn’t yell which was a relief, but you still held onto your breath. “This is about a girl that isn’t you.”

You finally met his eye again, feeling like a deer caught in the headlights.

[ramblings-daily]

A Little Too Late // Nine

Fandom: Criminal Minds Words: 6,148 Warning: mention of the word sexual assault Pairing: Luke Alvez / Penelope Garcia Characters: Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez, Derek Morgan, Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, Emily Prentiss, David Rossi, Tara Lewis and Stephen Walker

Chapter Nine [link to FF / Chapter One / Chapter Two / Chapter Three / Chapter Four / Chapter Five / Chapter Six / Chapter Seven / Chapter Eight]

Wednesday 8:00AM

"I'm sorry," Derek walked into the waiting room where the others are. "I didn't hear wrong through the phone, right?" He furrowed his eyebrows together in astonishment. "Daisy was in Penelope's room last night? The woman that we're all considering to be the original target in Jacob's stalking motivated life?"

Emily nodded her head. "I know, it's crazy." When she woke up in the middle night to Penelope calling her through the hospital's phone, informing her of this sudden appearance. She had thought Penelope was just imagining things from a nightmare but words from the nurses matched with Penelope. "She's still in there. Evidently, she doesn't want to go anywhere outside of the room."

"Why?" Tara asked.

"It took her a lot of courage to step out of her hiding spot," Emily said. "She's scared. If she steps out again, he'll find her."

Spencer fixed his tie. "Staying in the same room with the new target by the same stalker isn't the brightest idea in the world."

JJ sighed. "That's what we tried to explain to her but she's not listening to anyone else but Penelope."

"She feels connected with Penelope in some way," Stephen said. "As a victim herself, she probably doesn't trust anyone else with the exception of a group of people who went through the same horror."

"And considering that we don't know if there are any other victims," Luke spoke after staying silent since the others had met up with him. He had to wake up early and ask for Stephen and Rossi's help to get him onto the wheelchair. "There is no group for Daisy to run off to. Penelope is her only source that can understand the same pain." He glanced up at the team. "The same goes with Penelope."

Derek closed his eyes briefly as he sat down. "What are we going to do? If Daisy doesn't want to leave Penelope's side and the same goes with her, are we just going to leave probably the two most unstable people in the world together?"

Emily cleared her throat. "Yes, that's exactly what we're going to do." She took a deep breath. "Section Chief wants this guy caught. He has hurt two of our own deliberately while managing to get away with it. We're not going to work on any other case until we put the damn bastard behind bars."

"Has the results come back from the forensic team yet?" JJ asked. The team had stayed a few extra hours inside the house, trying their best to look for the smallest detail. Besides the diary, wall of photos and camera equipment - nothing much stood out for the team that could help them in the case. Of course, finding the bodies shoved into the back of the closet also adds the body count for the guy. He's a serial killer with extreme stalker tendencies. "There has to be something for us," feeling suffocated and lost for almost weeks now. JJ has been wondering to herself if she could survive this case. It's not for her own well being but for Penelope's. Knowing that your best friend was severely hurt by someone and always looking over her shoulders, JJ has never felt so useless than right now. "What about the diary?" Adverting her attention over to Spencer, her eyes practically pleading. "You found something?"

"Besides the obvious small handwriting," Spencer pointed out. "No." The diary was filled with nothing but sentences of how Daisy feared for her life. How every single walking moment outside her house, she felt as if she would get snatched up. It made him frustrated that Daisy never wrote down his name. Maybe it could be that she never got to know his name but it could've been used as valid evidence for the future court trials. "Did we get something for the M.E?"

"The bodies been dead for a least a couple months." Rossi informed the team. "Not as long as the grandparents and grandchildren that we found in the other house but it's still a family." He looked at the team. "A family with a house that he needed for a brief secret hideout."

Tara snapped her fingers before she turned around to look through her bag. "I forgot," she flipped through the photos that Emily had brought for her earlier. "I looked through some of the photos and noticed something." Laying out a couple of pictures on the nearby table for the team to have a full look at, she cleared her throat. "What do you notice?"

"Penelope." Luke answered.

"Yes but what else?" Tara asked further.

Derek leaned closer, narrowing his eyes at the photos. "Her hair." He pointed at two of the photos that were taken with a close up on Penelope. "Most of the photos are close ups her face but the main point is her hair." Moving his finger, he pointed out other photos where you can barely see Penelope's face but it seems as if the main attraction of the photos is her hair.

"Why would he do that?" JJ asked.

Tara took out some more photos. "These are pictures from inside her house," The team had found other pictures hidden in one of the drawers from yesterday's search. It seems as if he had managed to sneak into her house, taking photos of her bed and little figurines. "These are things that indicate who Penelope is."

JJ nodded her head. "Why would he take photos of just her figurines? Look. He even took pictures of her clothes."

"As if he was taking pictures to know more about who she is." Spencer said.

"Which is normal when you're a stalker." Rossi remarked.

"Do you remember?" Emily could sense that the team's about to reveal a big clue. "The first couple days when Penelope was in the hospital, she said nothing to us and only to the nurses." She crossed her arms. "One time, the nurse came up to me and said if Penelope was ever a brunette before."

"No." JJ quickly answered.

Emily nodded her head. "Exactly. The nurse had explained that Penelope kept repeating in her sleep that the Unsub kept wanting to change her. He wanted to make her perfect. We've seen the basement, the videos, the daises and the notes. Jacob's main goal besides wanting to force Penelope to love him was to change her from who she originally is."

"I get that," Derek said. "That's what we came up during the victimology. And that wouldn't make sense if we're all assuming Daisy was the original target. I haven't seen her but I've been told that she's a blond? Penelope and Daisy are blonds, right?"

"She's not." Emily said. "She has brunette hair, Morgan."

"Not blond?" Derek questioned.

Luke moved around in the wheelchair. "Our first assumption is right then."

"Not quite." Emily deduced. "We know that Jacob's somehow really good in what he does. What if Daisy wasn't his original target? What if there was never an original target in the first place?"

"That wouldn't make sense because victimology would be just mess up." JJ said. "We'll have to go back to the board and rethink everything about this guy. Victimology has to match. We have to find out more about Daisy and start comparing some of the things she does or loves with what Penelope loves. Maybe that's where their common grounds meet and how they became his target."

"I've seen her." Emily said. "She's brunette but she didn't originally have it since birth. Penelope loves changing her hair sometimes."

"Hair color," Spencer suggested. "Both women love to change their hair? I don't know. Statistically, it's a little insane to become obsessed with someone over just a hair color change."

Derek stood up. "I agree. Em, you're not making sense right now. What you're trying to say is that Daisy and Penelope had fallen victim to just being alike with some different woman?"

"No." Emily sighed. "For weeks, we were assuming that Penelope became a target because she matches with the original target in Jacob's mind. The hair, the unique personality - we were putting those in consideration while comparing to an invisible someone." She looked at the team, she knows they are the smartest group of people in the field. "What if all along it wasn't about a specific someone that he has been trying to stalk?"

Spencer's mind started to click. "As in there was something between Daisy and Penelope, detail or personality wise that attracted Jacob? It was never about the person itself. It was always about how he views them in his own mind." He started to remember the little flower notes that the team had found early on in the investigation. "What if he actually believes he can change them? That Garcia was never meant to be a quirky, outspoken, blond woman in his mind? What if he sees her as the opposite and is aiming toward changing into his version until he's happy?"

Derek knows that his mind hasn't been 100% into the case due to his emotions but right now, the team is making absolutely no sense for him. "Wait a minute," he held his hands up in the air. "What about the name? Daisy is Daisy. Penelope is Penelope. Why is he forcing Penelope to view or call herself Daisy?"

Luke nodded his head in agreement. "If we really do think that this wasn't never about stalking someone who is familiar to him but a different kind of stalking mission for Jacob. Why the name? And what does that have to do with the hair? If he's really not viewing them as a reminder of someone previously in his life, why is he obsessed with wanting to change their hair?"

"Assumption." Tara said quietly. All the team is doing is assuming and guessing, something out of the ordinary for them. "We can't just stand here and assume that Jacob is stalking them over hair until we know for sure." There is just something she feels different in her guts. "I still think Penelope and Daisy became targets because they remind him of somebody, not something."

Stephen took a deep breath. "I've never been so confuse on a case like this one." The only valuable information that he got from this conversation is the fact that the team still doesn't know why Jacob is doing what he's doing. Why the murders? Why the stalking? Why the hair obsession, if he even has one? Why the obsession of the name Daisy? It's more as if the team has become more confused and faltering in loss hope than before after this conversation.

"If we want to know or understand anything about this bastard, we have to go to the one person that seems to be the most reliable source here." Tara suggested. "All we're doing right now is assuming and we don't do that. Regardless if she is uncomfortable or not, she has to help us. With the help, the bastard can be put behind bars. Penelope and Daisy would be able to breathe freely again without worrying over their shoulders." She looked at Emily. "Hair, name, why them? Don't you think we should understand what each of them mean from her? Before we stand here and make assumptions." She shrugged her shoulders. "Regardless of whatever kind of stalking he is doing, he's still murdering people one by one and harming more people along the way."

Emily sighed. "You're right. I'm sorry. Maybe I'm just wrong on the whole thing because of the stress going on from the case. We can't make assumption based on pictures or conversations that nurses has heard before." As Unit Chief, she should've thought better. She shouldn't have assumed this or that based on little details that hasn't been proven yet. "JJ," she looked at her friend. "In order for us to understand why he's actually stalking Penelope, we have to know what attracted him to Daisy. If she does remind him of someone, you have to ask her. I want you to spend the day with Penelope and Daisy, slowly gain their trust and maybe with that, they can actually remember something helpful."

JJ nodded her head. "I got it."

Luke glanced up. "What do you want me to do?"

"Rest." Emily ordered. "You barely just had surgery. We shouldn't have even woken you up for this meeting."

. . .

Wednesday 9:10AM

"You can have mine," Penelope slid her breakfast tray over to Daisy. "I'm not that hungry."

Daisy glanced up. "Are you sure?"

Slowly nodding her head, Penelope reassured her with a small smile. "Go ahead." Although it's only been a couple hours but she feels horribly bad for this woman. Coming here out of nowhere, out of her own safety zone just because she heard that somebody went through the same thing? "You didn't have to come here, you know. Safety should be your first priority."

"Safety?" Daisy repeated as she bit into the piece of toast. "Hiding in the corner, wondering when will the door open and he walks inside? No. I rather stay here, knowing that you're here. I mean, your friends are cops right?"

"Agents." Penelope corrected her. "How did you find out about me? And why would you know if we went through the same thing by the same person?"

"Daisies." Daisy replied. "It's the flowers."

Penelope knit her eyebrows in confusion. "Flowers?"

"I turned on the television and every channel I was flipping to, it was talking about how you went missing. Details on how it happened and how the media is thinking that you were being stalked came up. They revealed that you had flowers sent to you every week by an anonymous sender. And it always happened to be daisies." Daisy stopped eating for a brief second and looked at Penelope. "I had the same thing. For weeks, my workplace and home kept having flowers sent there. At first, it was cute. I thought maybe it was a secret admirer." Daisy cleared her throat as her voice slowly became shaky. "It's cute. Secret admirers are meant to be cute and never known. Until it became so frequent and alarming that I got scared."

Penelope clenched her hands together. "What made you scared?"

"The notes from the flowers. It was always the same." Daisy took a deep breath. "You're as perfect as - "

"A field of daisies." Penelope immediately finished. She can forget those words. "How long? How long were you with him?"

Daisy blinked her eyes. "Four months."

Penelope gasped. She had only been with him for a week and the pain that he gave her, it's already tremendously awful enough to scar her for life. The mere thought of Daisy being stuck with him for four months, unable to get help or escape in that time - tears immediately brimmed against Penelope's eyes. "I'm so sorry."

"What? No." Daisy shook her head. "I should be the one that's sorry. If I didn't manage to escape, he wouldn't need to go out and find another person to stalk. What you went through, it's all my fault."

"No. Absolutely not. Why would it - " she paused and exhaled deeply. "So, that's how I sound like."

Daisy looked at Penelope with confusion written all over her face. "What are you talking about?"

"Always blaming myself when it's not my fault." Penelope said. "None of this is our fault. It has taken a lot of convincing for me to sit here and give you these words of advice but," she makes sure Daisy was staring at her. "This isn't our fault. Don't think that we were on the wrong place, wrong time. That's not it." That's when Luke's words repeated in her mind. "A wise friend of mine told me this." Penelope softly smiled as she repeated Luke's words to Daisy. "Don't think like that. It isn't your fault. Repeat after me. It's not your fault."

"You're lucky," Daisy slid both of the trays away. "You're surrounded by so many people."

"I mean," Penelope shrugged her shoulders. "They're friends of mine but they're also agents. I'd be worried if they weren't surrounded around me, no matter how annoying it gets when they keep asking if I'm fine." She bit her lower lip, wondering if she should ask or not. There's been a question hovering over her mind since she saw Daisy. "Did he..." Maybe she shouldn't ask. "Never mind."

"You wanted to ask if he did what he did with you, with me?" Daisy asked. "No." Feeling relieved that it never reached to the point, she briefly smiled. "I just barely ate."

Penelope narrowed her eyes. "That's it?" Feeling a little taken back, she cleared her throat. It's a good thing. What she went through is horrible enough, if Daisy never actually got sexually assaulted by him, it's good. A person should never hope or wish for such a thing to happen to a woman. "How'd you find me?" She understood the whole media part. Penelope has been trying so hard to not look through the trending topics on the internet or even the news on the television. She's not used to that kind of attention especially the kind that keeps calling her out as a victim.

"I wandered to different hospitals..." Daisy answered. "Until I found you."

"But how - " the sound of someone knocking on the door distracted her. JJ opened the door, with a small smile. "JJ..."

JJ cleared her throat. "I hope you don't mind but can I stay inside? Someone has to be on guard and today's my turn."

"Guard?" Daisy asked. "There wasn't one here last night. That's how I was able to get inside the room."

"There was," JJ answered. "Agent Lewis was just inside the waiting room since she didn't want to distract Penelope from her sleep." She sat down on the couch, her eyes glancing between Daisy and Penelope. Visual wise, they couldn't be anymore different than each other. Daisy has a sharp cheekbones and a slender body. The way she keeps adverting her eyes anywhere but toward people's eyes also indicates that she's either fearful or naturally hard to interact with. Penelope, she's a people's person. She's lively, quirky, and sassy. It seems as if their personalities are also different. "My name is Jennifer Jareau, what's yours?"

"Daisy."

JJ glanced over at Penelope, indicating that she needs help. They need an actual full name to start searching through possible missing person reports. Getting the message through JJ's eyes, Penelope looked over at Daisy. "It would help us if you can say your full name? It'll be easier for my friends to protect you if they know who you exactly are."

"Daisy Carter."

"Thank you." JJ said. "I know you probably feel uncomfortable and a little doubtful to be around me and my other friends. We don't understand the pain and suffering you went through. But I am just glad that you're okay and safe. The fact that you managed to get here, that's very brave of you." She softly smiled, trying to ease Daisy's uncomfortableness. "I know it wasn't easy for you to do."

Penelope could sense what was going on. The case has become more urgent and more in the public's eyes since Luke got hurt. "Let me do it."

Confused on what she meant, JJ stared at her. "What?"

"Tech analyst." Penelope said confidently. "Hospitalized or not, I am still BAU's relief of hope and dreams."

She knew that Penelope would do this. "No. You still need your rest."

"I helped big time last night." Penelope argued.

"Under circumstances, yes." JJ explained. "We were in midst of a - "

Penelope leaned over and opened the top drawer next to the hospital bed. "I'm doing it." Taking out a laptop, Penelope immediately started typing away on the keyboard. She could practically imagine JJ rolling her eyes right now. Feeling more determine than ever, Penelope glanced up from the screen - giving Daisy a reassuring smile.

. . .

Wednesday 10:00AM

Luke returned to his room after the meeting. As soon as he was alone, he wheeled himself over to the window for fresh air. He has been watching the cars go by for more than a few minutes now. Since last night, Tara's words has been repeating in his head over and over again. Has he started liking Penelope without realizing it? Does he feel more about her than he should be? And even if he does, what can he do?

He took a deep breath, his eyes glancing up toward the sky. Penelope would never like him. Sure, they've become closer in a span of a week than the seven months of teasing and joking that they had. But none of his feelings would matter if the feelings aren't reciprocated.

Slowly, he lift his hand over to his heart - feeling the rush paced irregular heartbeats that he's having as he thinks of Penelope. Before he knew it, a smile spread across his face. Seeing his own reflection on the window, that's when he saw it. The expression he has written all over his face as he keeps thinking of Penelope Garcia.

. . .

Wednesday 3:00PM

"She's smiling a lot," JJ informed the team as soon as they met up again. She sat down across from Emily and next to Spencer in the hospital's cafeteria. The team has no energy to be traveling for food. "I think the fact that Daisy is there with her eases her mind a bit. Penelope is trying really hard for her." Emily smiled. "That's really good. She just needed to motivate someone instead of us trying to do so with her."

JJ cracked a sincere smile on her face. "She's starting to be stubborn again." Can't help but wipe a few tears away from her eyes, she took a deep breath. "I've missed that stubbornness."

"How's Luke?" Rossi asked.

"His grandmother has to work today," Spencer said as he took a bite of his food. "She asked for us to take care of him on her behalf."

Emily took a sip of her water. "Did anyone know that he has only his grandmother?" Since joining the team, Luke spoke very rarely of his family. The fact that they found out that his only living family member is his grandmother, it was heartbreaking.

"It seems as if Luke keeps to himself a lot." Derek said.

"Not with Penelope." JJ said. "We've seen how he is around her. He acts differently with her even if he doesn't realizes it."

Rossi leaned against his chair and took a deep breath. "When do you think they'll confess?"

JJ took a peek at Spencer's sandwich, wondering if it's something she can eat. "Penelope and Luke? For him, until he realizes how he feels about her. Penelope? It's hard to say about her."

Emily felt her phone vibrate. Taking her phone out, she arched an eyebrow. "Uh, Penelope just sent me a text."

"What is it?" Derek asked.

"She said she wants to meet all of us in the doctor's office." Emily looked around at the team, wondering what could this be about. "Should I be worried?" "Do you think she found something about Daisy?"

Rossi stood up. "About time. Whatever information we get, at least it's still progress."

. . .

Wednesday 4:10PM

"What's the matter?" Derek questioned as he closed the door behind him.

Penelope sighed. "Something's off."

Luke looked at her. "What's off?"

"Daisy."

Tara crossed her arms. "What's off about her?"

"You know as much as I do, I know trauma really well. Not because of what I went through but because of the counseling I did every week with the group." Penelope shrugged her shoulders, feeling unsure about everything. "I can read trauma almost immediately. At first, maybe it was because I was thrilled to see Daisy alive but as she talked about her experience with Jacob - nothing fit right."

"Maybe the way he was with her was just different with how he treated you." Rossi suggested.

"That's what I thought too." Penelope agreed. "Until I started doing my keyboard magic and came up empty."

"Empty?" Emily repeated. "You never come up empty with you work on computers, Penelope."

"Exactly." Penelope turned her laptop around, showing the team the screen. "JJ was there when she told us her name. Daisy Carter." On the middle of the screen, a flashing number showcases how many Daisy Carter's are there in the United States. ZERO. "That's odd, right?"

Spencer furrowed his eyebrows. "Maybe she's just scared? Revealing her real name could mean harm for her."

"Yeah." Penelope said. "Until I did this." She quickly type a different name into the system and one picture showed up on the screen.

Stephen narrowed his eyes in surprise. "Carter Daisy?" A picture of the woman the team knows as Daisy is on the middle of the screen. "Her name's Carter Daisy?"

"Not her real name." Penelope clicked on another section. "Birth name is Carter Williams but she legally changed it to Carter Daisy a year ago." She took a deep breath. "She has a record." Penelope opened one of the criminal history folders.

Luke moved his wheelchair closer to the screen to read her past arrests. "Assault and battery? Identity Fraud?" He couldn't hide his shock. "Who is this woman?"

"Wait a minute," Spencer rummaged through his bag for the diary. Flipping through some of the pages, he stopped and read a paragraph out loud for them. "I think I'm going crazy. I can't walk on the streets without thinking that somebody is following me. The fact that I have to keep looking over my shoulders is driving me insane. Is this how a person should live their life? If it weren't for Carter, I think I might lose it. Thankfully, she was there today. Helping me walk on the streets so I wouldn't get hurt. It's weird. She has only been my friend for a little over a month but she understands me so well. It's as if she's my guardian angel. Being her friend must've brought something good for me. I should stop being paranoid now. It has been a month since I've seen him around."

"Carter?" Tara asked. "That has to be a lot more than a coincidence. Having a friend named Carter and the stalking suddenly felt as if it stopped?"

JJ narrowed her eyes at the picture on the screen. "What if that's not it? I'm talking about earlier in Penelope's room. When I was sitting across from her today, I thought that she didn't want to look at me in the eye because she didn't trust me yet. Maybe even uncomfortable." She snapped her fingers, her eyes alarmed. "What if she actually couldn't look at me in the eye because she knew that I would know something was off once she does?"

"What does that make me?" Penelope asked. "I spent almost twelve hours with her, telling stories of what I went through with Jacob because I thought she went would understand my pain, the tears I spent in the freezing cold. I just don't understand. I mean, I saw it. The look of pain on her face, those tears - " she tore her eyes away from the screen, visibly angry. "They were all a lie?"

Feeling as if something is definitely off, Emily leaned over and took the doctor's office phone. Dialing the number to the nurse's reception desk across from Penelope's room, she waited for somebody to pick up. "This is Agent Prentiss. Can you tell me if our visitor is still in the room?" She waited a few seconds. "Do not let her leave. Don't be alarmed or anything. Act causal." Hanging up the phone, she looked at Penelope. "Tara's right. It's too much of a coincidence that in the diary, it stated that she met a friend named Carter after being stalked."

"What does this mean?" Penelope asked, she's not as quick as her profilers.

Luke sighed. "It means that we were wrong on the profile."

Stephen nodded his head. "Jacob. He's not working alone."

"Are you seriously telling that I was in the same room with...." Penelope wanted to throw up. Feeling overwhelmed and dizzy over the sudden findings, she didn't know what to do. Just as she was about to stand up from her seat and run out of the office for some air, she felt someone intertwining their hand with her own hand. She adverted her attention over to Luke, the one who can only keep her calm at the moment.

"Stay here." Emily directed her words to Penelope and Luke. "Come on." Immediately, the rest of the team rushed out of the office.

As soon as they were alone, Penelope looked down at their interlocked hands. "I shared everything with her..."

Luke closed his eyes. "I know." He doesn't know what to say. "I'm sorry."

"Why? Why is she helping someone like him?" Penelope didn't want to believe all of this. Her eyes adverted over to the laptop screen, the picture of this woman looking back at her. "She seemed...."

"Relatable." Luke interrupted. "I think that was their goal. If she was never Daisy from the beginning, we have assume that the real Daisy is - " Penelope nodded her head. "Dead."

Luke looked down at their hands and couldn't help but think as if Penelope is probably uncomfortable with the hand holding. Slowly he tried to pull his hand away but paused once he felt her squeeze. "Penelope..."

"There is something I have to tell you." Penelope said slowly.

"Okay."

"Do you remember when I said that he got angry because of what I said?"

Luke nodded his head. "The truth about your feelings," he repeated what he remembered from the conversation. "Why are you asking?"

Penelope can't hide this fact anymore. If he has to know about every single detail on the case, he has to know the truth. Especially after he got hurt like this. He became a target because of her words. "What did you think I said? The truth."

"I just thought that maybe you said you don't love him." Luke explained. "It's something he would be angry about."

"No." Penelope finally looked up from the floor and looked straight into Luke's eyes. "You got hurt because of what I said. Since then, I've been sitting in my room wondering if I should tell you. Maybe a part of me is scared because of what you would say. I mean, for seven months, I've been nothing but rude to you. I never was nice to you when you joined the team. So what right do I have to feel what I feel?" She took a deep breath, trying to relax her nerves. "The fear of being rejected probably overcame me and I never - "

Luke blinked his eyes several times in confusion. "Wait - " he looked at Penelope, his eyes widened. "What are you talking about?"

"I told him that I liked you." Penelope finally confessed. "He showed your face on the screen and I became scared on what he would do to you. That's when I realized that I've liked you since the second week you joined the team. I just never knew or came to understand those feelings until I was kidnapped. The moment I was dying, I thought of you. The moment I was getting hurt, I thought of you. The moment I was freezing in the cold, I just kept thinking of you." Tears started brimming against her eyes, she could tell he's shocked. She knew that this would happen. He would never feel the same way as she does but that's not important. "These feelings may seem sudden to you but I don't care because these feelings don't matter. Nothing will ever happen, I promise. I just thought...." she shrugged her shoulders. "The fact that you became a target is because of me. I know you said to not think it's my fault and trust me, I've been trying. Heck, I even told whoever she is, the same words you told me on the rooftop. But as much as I want to believe in those words, I can't help but think that he's out to get you now because of me." She paused, waiting to see if Luke would react but he's just sitting there like a rock. "Because of the words of I like him, I like Luke Alvez came out of my mouth. Not only did you get hurt but the poor housekeeper died."

Luke pulled his hand away from Penelope, his mind processing her words as the next few minutes went by. "I - "

"It's okay. I don't care that you don't feel the same, it really doesn't matter."

"No," Luke shook his head. "Penelope, listen to me. I - " the office door opened with Rossi showing up. "She tried to run but we got her."

Penelope stood up. "Where is she?"

"Come on." Rossi opened the door wider.

Before Luke could get any other words in, Penelope immediately rushed out of the room behind Rossi. Taking a deep breath, he pushed the wheels over to the scene that has almost everybody on the hospital floor's attention.

"Carter Williams - "

"Daisy!" She screamed while struggling from Emily's hold. "My name's Carter Daisy!"

"You're under arrest." Emily continued. "Anything you say will - "

Carter stopped struggling once she saw Penelope standing next to the other agents. Her expression immediately changed. "I was good, wasn't I? Can't believe you also fell for my act." Emily tried to push her forward to bring her back to the BAU for questioning but Carter managed to fight her off. As soon as she was on her own, she rushed toward Penelope while laughing hysterically. JJ and Derek blocked Penelope from her but that still didn't stop her from talking. "He'll get you again. He never fails." Carter warned as she glared at the agents, her eyes stopping at Luke before she looked at Penelope again. "Haven't you wondered why you couldn't find her? Daisy?" She grinned with satisfaction. "She's dead."

"Shut up." Emily grabbed her arms. "Let's go."

"I can smell your fear from here, Penelope. Just know that when you sleep, he's watching. When you breathe, he's there! And once he's done preparing, he's not going to come here to just hurt your little crush! He'll be here to take you!!!" Carter eventually was pushed into the elevators but her laugh was still echoing through the hallways for them to hear.

Penelope took a deep breath. "What do we do?"

Derek turned around, his hands on her shoulders. "Don't worry. She's only taunting you."

"What if he does get me again?" Penelope's shaky voice almost broke everybody's heart. "I can't act strong anymore if he does. I can't be the heroine behind the screen to help you again. If he gets me again, everything I've been working on the past two days - learning to be brave, learning to not - " she stopped talking. "It'll be for nothing but failure."

"He won't. I promise." Rossi said.

Penelope suddenly felt tired and weak. Without warning, she fainted into Derek's arms. "Penelope..." Derek carried her, his eyes looking at the team. "We can't let her stay here anymore. If Carter's taunt does end up being true, we have to take her somewhere else."

Luke nodded his head. "I'm not staying here either."

. . .

Wednesday 4:40PM

Jacob leaned against his chair with a smirk plastered on his face. The team's faces were on his screen. He had managed to reboot his system and go through the hospital's new security. Everything that had just happened, he watched it with such amusement. Picking up his glass of water, he adverted his attention elsewhere. "Would you like some water?" Not waiting for an answer, he finished the water within seconds. "Ahh, too bad." Standing up from his chair, he made his way over to the corner of the room. "It's nice to meet you."

With her hands and legs tied up and a tape over her mouth, Bernice sat in the corner of the room. Her eyes filled with fiery and determination, she is not going to show this man fear.

"Quiet person, aren't you?" Jacob sighed. "That's alright. I don't need to hear words from you anyway."

She silently watched as he went back over to his computers. Bernice took notice of the building and room, mentally remembering every single detail. Showing this man fear is the last thing she'll ever do. She is not going down without a damn fight.

a/n: thank you for the support on the previous chapter! here is the next chapter, hope you all like it (:

[tran5rightsos]

You’ve Cut the Wrong Damn Wire - Chapter Thirteen

Tags and Warnings: Implied/ Referenced Rape/Non-Con, Nightmares

Word Count: 1837

Leave Kudos?

Calum rolled onto his back and cracked an eye open at the dark ceiling, wondering when he became such a light sleeper as he listened to Luke’s nonsensical mumbles. For a minute, they stopped and Calum wondered if the dream was over and it was safe to go back to sleep, but then Luke started talking again, clearer now.

“Needa finish m’homework,” he slurred into his pillow.

He was quiet again for a moment, but Calum felt him tense.

“No, I’ll get in trouble,” he protested, weakly shoving at the bedsheets, “No, stop.”

“Luke,” Calum said, cold dread washing over him as he sat up and shook Luke’s shoulder.

“Please don’t, I have to finish it.” He startled Calum with a loud, agonised noise, his chest heaving as he gripped his pillow. “It hurts, I’m not ready, it’ll bleed.”

“Luke.”

Luke’s eyes cracked open, darting around wildly as tears spilled over. “It’s due tomorrow,” he croaked, clawing at his pillow.

“Hey, it’s me, man.” Calum rubbed Luke’s arm, his own heartbeat loud in his ears. “It was just a dream, you’re safe now. I’m here.”

“I got a papercut,” Luke fretted.

“You had a nightmare,” Calum soothed, “You’re okay now.”

Luke frowned up at him.

“Do you wanna talk about it?”

Shaking his head, Luke reached for Calum to lie down again so that he could bury himself in his arms. Calum squeezed him tightly, wishing he’d asked Michael what he was supposed to do when Luke had nightmares.

“I’m sorry,” Luke said softly.

Calum could feel tears soaking through his shirt. “‘S okay,” he assured him, feeling useless. What could he say to comfort him? “Do you want me to call Michael?”

Luke shook his head.

“Water?”

“Can you just stay with me?” Luke whispered, “Please?”

“Yeah, of course.” It was barely dawn, Calum didn’t intend to go anywhere anyway.

“I wonder what Michael’s doing,” Luke mumbled.

“Sleeping, I hope,” Calum joked.

“We normally talk about kills together. Plan everything out, even if I’m not gonna be there.”

Calum traced his nails over Luke’s back. “Does that help?”

“Yeah. It makes me feel like he’s gonna be okay. I don’t want him to get hurt or caught.”

“You wanna go over to Ash’s later? See how they’re doing?”

“Yeah.” Luke turned over, but kept Calum’s arm around his waist. “That’d be good.”

“Luke?”

“Yeah?”

“Is Michael’s nan really sick?” Calum had been wondering if she was or if it was a lie to cover up what they were really doing, but hadn’t known how to ask. Now seemed like a good time for odd, distracting questions.

“Yeah,” Luke replied, “That’s why we came back. We’ll probably leave again once she passes.”

Calum frowned. “Is that what you want?”

“I keep seeing people I used to know,” Luke said softly, “It’s … really hard.”

Calum gave him a squeeze. “Keep in touch, though, yeah? I’ll miss you.”

“Yeah.”

As unsure as he was of the whole killing thing, Calum didn’t want Michael and Luke to go. They were some of the only people he still related to since getting kicked out, but he didn’t want Luke to stay and be miserable like he was in school either. He deserved better than that.

Calum didn’t think either of them had gotten back to sleep by the time dawn lit up the room. He wondered how long they were going to pretend they did, how much sunlight needed to fill the room before they pretended to wake up feeling well-rested.

Easing himself out of Calum’s arms, Luke was the first to give up on the charade and make his way to the bathroom to shower. Calum went to the kitchen, sending Ashton a text to let him know they might come over later.

Luke seemed better after his shower, eager to see Michael, the man he usually turned to for comfort after nightmares. Calum had to ask him how to help Luke on those occasions. They didn’t have a solid idea of how long Ashton and Michael would be living together and he was afraid it might happen again.

Walking into Ashton’s apartment, Calum was surprised to find that it looked no different from the way it had when he’d lived there. Had it actually changed when he moved in? At first he’d been afraid of taking up space getting in Ashton’s way, now Calum was wondering if the apartment had ever felt like anything other than Ashton’s, even as he got comfortable enough to call it his home too.

“Hey,” Ashton greeted.

“What’s up?” Calum returned.

“Mikey!” Luke exclaimed, hurrying into the lounge room.

“You been okay?” Ashton asked.

Calum nodded. “You?”

“I’m good. Michael’s been … better than I expected. I thought he’d be more impulsive and less careful.”

“Cool.”

Ashton sighed and gestured for Calum to come into the lounge room, looking like he regretted the awkwardness.

As Calum took a seat on the couch, he wondered if every conversation was somehow going to lead back to the killing thing. He missed having normal talks with his boyfriend.

A bespectacled Michael was showing Luke some pages of stuff he and Ashton, judging by the mismatched sets of handwriting Calum could see, had written. Luke seemed completely absorbed in what Michael was saying, something about routines and Ashton’s research.

“I didn’t know you knew how to do that,” Calum told Ashton as he came in, “Stalk people on the internet, I mean.”

Ashton shrugged. “It’s pretty easy. I, um … I would never do it to regular people,” he assured him, “It’s mainly because I always try to pick targets that don’t live anywhere near me so that if someone went looking they wouldn’t find patterns. There’s also just … a lot you can find out about people through the internet.”

“Fuck yeah, there is,” Michael agreed with a grin, “We’re almost ready to go with Giles.”

“Already?” Luke questioned.

“Yep. We reckon we can get him this weekend or the next.”

With a sigh, Calum got up and went to the kitchen. Maybe he’d never be ready for that part of his friends’ lives. Maybe Ashton was right and it wasn’t going to sit right or be understandable.

As he rummaged through the fridge for leftovers to snack on, Michael came in and poured himself a bowl cereal that was far too sugary to belong to Ashton.

“What’s up?” he greeted as he poured the milk.

“What do you do when Luke has nightmares?” What better time to ask?

Michael frowned. “Did he have one?”

“Last night. I didn’t know what to do when he woke up and … it sucked.”

Michael nodded understandingly as he chewed on a spoonful of cereal. “I usually talk to him about them? I don’t expect you to do that, though, they’re really … It’s not fun.”

“He didn’t wanna talk about it this morning. I don’t think he trusts me enough for that.”

“Yeah, fair enough. I’ll ask him about it.”

“How’s Ashton?” Calum asked lowly.

“In general or since you broke up?”

Calum shrugged.

“We’re getting along,” Michael offered, “I think we just get each other like that, you know? I think he misses having you around, though.”

“I miss him too,” Calum sighed, “I just … I don’t think he trusts me.” He gestured vaguely. “There’s just so much he didn’t tell me and I get that he couldn’t, but … I don’t know if I can understand him like I thought I did. Like you do.”

“It’s probably better that you don’t. Needing to kill people to feel okay isn’t as great as it sounds.”

Calum huffed a laugh. “I guess not.”

Michael texted Luke to let him know when they’d be going after Giles while he and Calum were out buying food. Calum had been about to ask Luke what kind of cereal he liked when he turned to see him gently ruffling the head of a bunny teddy on a shelf. He snatched his hand back when he realised Calum was watching, looking embarrassed.

“Soft,” he mumbled with a shrug before taking his phone out to see Michael’s text.

Knowing when it would happen felt like a countdown. Calum wondered if some part of Giles could feel that he was running out of time, even if he had no idea why. Another part of him thought he deserved that fear.

“I can never sleep when Michael goes out alone,” Luke confessed when the night came.

“He’s not alone this time,” Calum reasoned, though he knew what Luke meant. He didn’t think he’d be any help, but he wished he was there all the same.

Luke constantly checked his phone as they stayed up watching movies. Calum hadn’t wanted to know much about their plan, but Luke knew every detail, probably in part because of all the times he’d gone with Michael. He didn’t relax until Michael finally texted to tell him they were home safe and Calum marveled at the fact that, at some point, someone had died and they hadn’t felt it. They hadn’t noticed at all.