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swagvapor · 3 months ago

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vapesquard · 4 months ago

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cigma-vape · 7 months ago

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thevapepack · 11 months ago

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adamcopland1 · 1 year ago

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vapeorizeruk · 1 year ago

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deadcactuswalking · 6 years ago

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 20th January 2019

So, uh, I‘ve been listening to a lot of Aminé recently.

FEATURED SINGLE #2 – “BLACKJACK” – Aminé

This is our second Featured Single, and I’ve decided this will be before the chart so feel free to skip this if you don’t want something beyond the charts to check out. This recently got a hilarious video, with ridiculous attention-to-detail and impressive... “choreography”. That counts as a single for me, and God, do I love this one. There’s this maddening melody that immediately gets pounded by an intense bass thud, with Aminé rapping monotonously initially, but gradually getting as excited as his ad-libs, with his quick flow accentuating both his loveable voice cracks and some of the funniest lyrics I’ve heard from the guy, including those four lines in the second verse, which he spends just praising and appreciating Jack Black?

Rockin’ and rollin’ like Jack Black / Schoolin’ you n****s like Jack Black (Yeah!) / How could you not like Jack Black? (How?) / I put that on my momma, n****, no cap

That second verse is great, by the way, there’s something so charismatic and enthusiastic about Aminé’s pointlessly specific pop culture references that can either breeze by so you don’t notice them or, as shown above, essentially be a rake joke.

Said she wants a spot on my list (Please) / I told her, “Go pray to your God” (I need to go to Church)

Yeah, that last part’s an ad-lib – more people should be doing back-and-forth exchanges in their ad-libs, 21 Savage’s done it in “10 Freaky Girls” and so has, uh... Cal Chuchesta? Anyway, this is literally a minute and 57 seconds long, so it doesn’t waste your time. Check it out if you like stuff by KYLE or enjoyed Aminé’s one hit, “Caroline”, although this isn’t really in the same range.

Top 10

Pretty busy week, let’s get into it quickly, because there’s not a lot to care about. “Sweet but Psycho” by Ava Max is still at the top spot and has been for about five or six weeks now. “7 rings” by Ariana Grande’ll take this spot next week, although we do have competition.

These next three songs are the competition, including “Nothing Breaks like a Heart” by Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus up one spot to the runner-up space, number-two.

Post Malone’s “Wow.” is also up one spot to number-three – good for it, this is a great song and I’d love it to hit #1.

Now, our first top 10 debut this week, “Dancing with a Stranger” by Sam Smith and Normani, arriving at number-four. This is Smith’s 17th Top 40 hit in the UK, and his 11th Top 10, whilst this is Normani’s second Top 40 hit and first Top 10 hit, so congratulations, I suppose, even though this isn’t including Fifth Harmony, who were hitmakers in their own right. We’ll talk more about this later.

“Sunflower” by Post Malone and Swae Lee from Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse isn’t moving at number-five.

Collapsing down five spots to number-six is “thank u, next” by Ariana Grande.

Our second top 10 single that debuted in this spot is “Giant”, by Calvin Harris and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man, at number-seven. This is Harris’ 34th or 35th Top 40 hit and 24th Top 10, and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man’s 3rd Top 40 hit and 2nd Top 10 hit after his smash “Human”. We’ll talk more about this one later as well.

“Play” by Jax Jones featuring Years & Years is up three places to number-eight, becoming Jones’ 4th Top 10 hit and Years & Years’ 5th.

Once again, we have a debut in the top 10, this time at number-nine, as Gesaffelstein and the Weeknd collaborate once again for “Lost in the Fire”. This is Abel’s 17th Top 40 hit and 7th Top 10, while it’s Gesaffelstein’s first charting song as a credited solo artist ever, so congratulations. We’ll talk about this one more a bit later.

Finally, “Without Me” by Halsey is at #10, and it hasn’t moved from last week.

Climbers

We have two UK hip-hop songs gaining pretty highly here, one being pretty good - “Options” by NSG featuring Tion Wayne, up 11 spots to #14 – and the other being awful – “Gun Lean” by Russ splash is up five spaces to #34, but that’s it.

Fallers

These are a different story, however. “18HUNNA” by Headie One and Dave is down five to #11, “Rewrite the Stars” by James Arthur and Anne-Marie is down eight to #15, “Lost Without You” by Freya Ridings is down seven to #16, “Ruin My Life” by Zara Larsson is down five to #17, “ZEZE” by Kodak Black featuring Travis Scott and Offset is down six to #19, “Undecided” by Chris Brown is down six to #21, as is “Shotgun” by George Ezra to #22, and “Baby” by Clean Bandit, Marina and Luis Fonsi to #23, with the space of #24 being taken by “Thursday” by Jess Glynne, down five spaces since last week... but that’s not all. “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper is down six to #27, “This is Me” by Keala Settle and the Greatest Showman Ensemble is down eight to #31, “imagine” by Ariana Grande is down 13 to #33, “A Million Dreams” by P!nk is down 11 to #35, “Eastside” by benny blanco, Halsey and Khalid is down eight to #39 and finally “Woman Like Me” by Little Mix featuring Nicki Minaj is down 12 to #40.

Dropouts

“Let You Love Me” by Rita Ora is out from #28, “SICKO MODE” by Travis Scott featuring Drake and Swae Lee is out from #36, “2002” by Anne-Marie is out from #37, “KIKA” by 6ix9ine featuring Tory Lanez is out from #32, “Happier” by Marshmello and Bastille is out from #35, “I’ll be There” by Jess Glynne is out from #40, “Grace” by Lewis Capaldi is out from #33 and “The Greatest Show” by Hugh Jackman, Keala Settle, Zac Efron, Zendaya and the Greatest Showman Ensemble is out from #38. That’s all, and there’s no returning entries, so let’s get straight to the main attraction.

NEW ARRIVALS

Yup, there’s eight of them. Let’s just blast through them as quickly as possible.

#38 – “Saturday Nights” – Khalid

Khalid is a great singer, and I’ve liked a lot of what he’s put out, but a full project from him would put me to sleep, hence I didn’t check out his EP he released last October titled Suncity. Thankfully, thanks to a remix with... Kane Brown of all people, it’s here for us to review, and as Khalid’s ninth top 40 hit, I can’t say it really stands up to his others. I think the guitar strumming has gotten a little too cliché in chill-pop, and I think Khalid was above following trends to a T, but he doesn’t really add anything except his sultry voice to what is essentially anyone’s instrumental, with off-kilter trap percussion and deep 808s, high-pitched vocal samples and again, that damn guitar. For some reason that guitar infuriates me so much, maybe it’s just because it’s so slick and runs through the entire song? This is entirely too polished and aggravatingly boring in that respect. Yeah, this is Khalid’s worst one yet. It’s exhaustingly overproduced, and not even his voice can save it.

#36 – “Leave Me Alone” – Flipp Dinero

...Is this post-trap?

Okay, so Flipp Dinero has been on the rise, and this is his first top 40 hit in the UK... and I honestly love it. We have this cutesy piano lead that’s so twinky it almost forgives the awfully cliché lyricism. In fact, everything here forgives that. Flipp Dinero’s raspy voice is a great contrast, and the trap beat here actually works because of how he flows over this, as it barely keeps up with him to the point that it has to add the producer tag and the “oh!” used in songs such as Nelly’s “Dilemma” and Travis Scott’s “3500” just to remind us it’s there. Flipp Dinero is freaking fantastic on this, and every “yuh” ad-lib is like an injection of happiness. There’s that flute you don’t even realise until Flipp stops (and no, he doesn’t do this often at all), and I haven’t even got into the hook. Not only is it insanely catchy, but it’s hilarious as Flipp sprays his heart out, with so much passion put into being mildly inconvenienced by a woman who wants to spend some time with him after they broke up. This is beautiful, and that’s not even sarcastic. This won’t be to everyone’s taste, but to me, this is so much fun. Better than the Michael Jackson song, though? Don’t even attempt the comparison.

#29 – “Someone You Loved” – Lewis Capaldi

God, this guy’s boring, and he doesn’t understand how music works. See, the vocals on the song are supposed to make sense relative to the instrumental, and if they don’t, there has to be justification or purposeful juxtaposition (see: “Leave Me Alone”). On “Grace”, he sounded out of place, and on his 2nd Top 40 hit, he sounds bored over a repetitive, droning piano melody. Lewis Capaldi strains his voice to James Arthur levels of undeserved intensity, and while Capaldi is definitely a better singer than Arthur, he’s just as lacking in any compelling content, delivery or personality. Does anyone actually care about Lewis Capaldi and what he has to say? No. No one does, because he’s Lewis Capaldi. We only found out we existed in England, and we’ve quite literally made his songs interchangeable, as his last hit dropped out this week. God, this guy is a bore in three minutes and two seconds. Leave me alone.

#25 – “Longshot” – Catfish and the Bottlemen

If I was still an indie/alternative rock-head like I used to be, I would be able to tell you all about Catfish and the Bottlemen because from what I heard, they were pretty damn good, actually. I’ve liked “7” and I heard their first album, it was okay, but I always knew there was a lack of a real hook to the band, that could blow them up, and I assume they’ve just found it, because this is their first top 40 hit in the UK, and, yeah, it’s pretty good. I like the intense build-up of that one guitar pluck until it just drops into a light pop-rock instrumental with enough power and distortion on the guitars and vocals to make it unique. There’s this ticking sound in the chorus that annoys me, but otherwise, it’s definitely a nice, catchy sing-a-long hook. Whilst I’ve never been all too fond on Van McCann’s somewhat nasal voice, I definitely think it works in the context of these poppier bangers, and like he says in the chorus, the little things do make me smile, as this instrumental is very intricately-layered without being cluttered. I love the passion in McCann’s “woo!” followed by a couple guitar strokes, I just think that’s a great moment you couldn’t exactly replicate with non-live instruments, as that chemistry between vocalist and band is important. This song overall? Yeah, I’m definitely getting back into these guys because this was fantastic. I love the mic feedback at the end and I’m actually really intrigued to what that leads up to on the album.

#13 – “Hello My Love” – Westlife

Why was this performed on the National Television Awards? Guys, you’re Westlife, you’re a music group. Talking about outrageous trivia, can you believe this, Westlife’s 28th Top 40 hit is literally just three minutes of nothing? It’s insane how popular these guys are yet they can get away with stuff like this when they reform for their first song in nearly a decade.

#9 – “Lost in the Fire” – Gesaffelstein and the Weeknd

The lyrical content on this one sucks. This is “Lost in the Fire”, and there are a few lines that are just really creepy, if anything, and really play up Bella Hadid’s sexuality for what seems like cheap views, because there’s really nothing else these dudes haven’t done that doesn’t sound exactly like this. They didn’t even make cover art, that’s how lazy these guys are. The groove’s semi-decent, I suppose, but there’s little to no build up and I feel like it really doesn’t have much of interest to talk about, which shouldn’t be true for a Weeknd song. The personality of Abel is obvious in other songs and albums, and his portrayal of this character is what makes him so intriguing. So where is he here? Is a Drake diss what the Weeknd would do, or what Abel would do? Now that is the question. Oh, yeah, and the synths here don’t exist. This song is boring as hell.

#7 – “Giant” – Calvin Harris and Rag ‘n’ Bone Man

Now, I like Rag ‘n’ Bone Man. Like Ed Sheeran, although I don’t like all – actually, a lot – of his music doesn’t mean I don’t like how genuine he is. He’s a normal, average guy who’s been releasing EPs, found a label and had the break-out hit written for him, so now he’s famous. There’s no nepotism, no cheap industry plant tactics, just pure talent getting him this far, and I respect that. So this sucks so much, like, wow, Rag ‘n’ Bone Man goes way too hard on this basic, lightweight synth-funk-inflected deep house beat. The trumpet drop is so pathetic it would make J Balvin and OMI laugh Harris off as an amateur. That shouldn’t be happening for someone 15 years and nearly 15 #1s into their career. I won’t be too mean on Rag ‘n’ Bone Man, though, he did his best, and he probably didn’t even hear the beat prior. What’s with the chanting at the end, though? That’s just odd.

#4 – “Dancing with a Stranger” – Sam Smith and Normani

So, some finger-snaps, Sam Smith humming seductively, and then that house beat kicks in and we get to pleasure our ears with a nice Sam Smith house track, because we totally need more of his entirely unfitting voice over slick, incredibly well-produced beats. Normani sounds absolutely amazing, and that subtle guitar in this beat is a nice touch, so nice it may just be essential to actually try and enjoy this song, because it’s not like these guys have chemistry (I mean, apart from the obvious reasons they wouldn’t have chemistry, guys, at least pretend this could happen).I guess this is okay, but its existence just tires me. Who wanted another one of these, really?

Conclusion

Since “Blackjack” is not applicable, we have eight to choose from (wow), and Best of the Week should be obvious, as it’s going to Flipp Dinero for “Leave Me Alone”. Yup, that’s right, that song’s a banger and a half. Catfish and the Bottlemen were damn close though, so they do get the Honourable Mention for “Longshot”. Worst of the Week goes to Gesaffelstein and the Weeknd for “Lost in the Fire”. Man, that just reeks of wasted potential. Dishonourable Mention? It could be a toss-up between any one of these guys. Pick your poison. Choose your fighter. See ya!

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