#Loser boy has to be one of my favorite genres of character

[yoongsriverandme]

✩︵ 주문 — MIROTIC!

❝ You want me, you've fallen for me You're crazy about me, you can't escape me I got you under my skin (Ooh) … ❞

⤑ pairing: like crazy!park jimin x shy fem!reader

⤑ genre: smut, fluff, angst, rom-comy vibes, friends-with-benefits, s2l2f2l (they did some things out of order), idiots to lovers, college!au, fuckboy!au, reverse harem, mutual pining, "unrequited love," she fell first but he fell harder.

⤑ wc: 9.3k

⤑ summary: sleeping with your long-time crush was not how planned to confess your undying love to him, but if it was the only way you could be close to him then so be it. jimin's had a lot of lovers, and you're one of them, but why the fuck is he so bothered by the thought of you being with someone else?

⤑ rating: nsfw/explicit - proceed with caution!

⤑ warnings: fuck boy!jimin, popular "it" boy!jimin, shy "loser" girl!reader, lowkey toxic!jimin (i'm not sorry!), making out, bathroom sex, public sex, exhibitionism, vaginal sex, vaginal fingering, A LOT of dirty talk, kinda shitty aftercare sorry, protected sex (pocket condoms 😓), JEALOUS jimin like holy shit, possessiveness, angst for a min, heavy pining, feelings realization, miscommunication, arguing, emotionally constipated!jimin, love confessions, angst with a happy ending (sorry nammy :/), not everyone gets a cameo this time sighs sadly.

⤑ date posted: march 9, 2025

⤑ authors note: HEY HEY HEY!!! bet you guys didn't expect this one!!! (i didn't either, random inspo struck me), but literally every single idea i've ever posted about IS sitting in drafts, and this one has been halfway done for weeks, so i figured i'd put it out there as i work on some of my other bigger pieces!

i ALSO just wanted to pop in here and say WOW, thank you so much for your support like... the feedback for my account has been phenomenal, and i want you all to know how touched i am!

with that out of the way, i hope you guys enjoy this fwb!au because wow was this a big one!

𓈒 ꪆৎ masterlist

⁘ preface: i only use bts as face claims! they are my muses, so anything they say or do, do not reflect their real life character!

The first time you ever talked to Jimin was when you had sex with him.

Now you know that sounds bad! 

But you had no idea what to do when he had come to you as you hovered awkwardly against one of the walls in the house party you had been forced to attend.

You were the designated driver for all intents and purposes, so the red solo cup that you had clasped in your hand was nothing but plain sprite, which was used as a mixer. 

‘Quite the devilish combination’ You couldn’t help but think as you swirled the carbonated liquid around boredly.

The room was stifling, filled to the brim with inebriated, sweaty bodies.

You were surrounded by sex, drugs and alcohol, some couples impatiently groping each other in the corner closests to you, and you forced yourself to look down, your cheeks warm at the blatant show of… affection.

It stunk, the music was too loud, and there were so many places you would rather be than here, like back home in your dorm studying, or watching an episode of your favorite show.

You didn’t fit into places like this, and you were one-hundred percent sure you had that fact stamped to your forehead.

The only pleasant part about this whole experience had been being able to see Jimin.

He was quite popular, and worlds away from you, but you couldn’t help but harbor a school yard crush on the pretty boy. 

He was just… tantalizing, with the way he spoke to the way he always held himself with a slight air of seduction. Boys and girls alike were ready to drop to their knees with so much as a word from the man, and you’re ashamed to say that you’re no different.

It was embarrassing, really, with how hard and fast you fell in love with somebody you barely knew, but he shared so much of himself, you felt as though you knew enough.

You know he’s funny, and kind, despite the… whorish, reputation that precedes him.

You’re in no place to judge, truly, because if he were to come up to you right now asking you if you would like to have sex with him, you would say yes.

“Lame party, right?” Sounds a voice from beside you.

You jump ten feet in the air, a bit of your drink spilling out over the edge of the cup as you fumble to keep the damn thing still in your hand.

“Uh – yes?” You answer with a slight grimace, your stomach drops to your ass when said host appears next to you.

Park fucking Jimin.

This was not what you meant! Not so suddenly! Not like this!

You stare at him dumbly as you spiral, and a small smirk tugs at the corner of his plush lips.

“You think?” He asks teasingly.

You instantly stumble to recover from your mistake. “No! Yes, no, I… I just –” You’re blubbering like an idiot, and Jimin seems to take great pleasure at reducing you to a flustered mess, but he relents with a laugh.

“”M just kidding.”

“No! I just… I’m not used to going to this sort of thing.”

“Oh?” Jimin questions with a raised brow. 

You put your drink on the small refreshment table next to you so you can wring your hands together as a nervous tick.

“I’m my friend's designated driver for the night, and they knew I wouldn’t be doing anything, so…”

“That’s selfless of you.” He compliments, and warmth spreads from the roots of your hair all the way to the tips of your toes. “Ah,” You try to wave him off. “It’s… it’s nothing. I don’t mind.”

“But also that makes sense.” Your brows furrow. “What makes sense?” You ask.

He bombards your space, hooded eyelids giving you a once over.

You’re suddenly very aware of how dirty and scruffed your converses are, and you fidget a bit under his scrutinizing gaze.

“That you haven’t come to one of my parties before, because I’d recognize your pretty face anywhere.”

Your eyes widened.

Holy shit. Was he hitting on you?

“Oh!” You laugh nervously. “That’s… that’s very sweet of you.” You gulp.

His smirk only gets deeper, and he leans closer so that his breath caresses the shell of your ear. If his intention is for you to be able to hear him over the music, he’s doing beyond a wonderful job at succeeding.

Your eyelids flutter rapidly, and your hands shake, and you have no idea where to put them as you lean back slightly.

“What do you say we go somewhere else?” He asks with a purr, pulling away just enough to gauge your reaction to his proposition.

Now, you’re not an easy girl. Jimin may sleep with anyone he wants, but you’re just not into that sort of thing, and you know better than to –

“Yes, please.” It comes out as a slight whimper, but he hears you nonetheless, because he takes you by the hand and pulls you through the throngs of people.

Your stomach is tied up in knots, and you’re not even sure if you’re still connected to reality.

Instead of taking you upstairs and into his room like you thought he would, he redirects you into the hallway and into the door, and your stomach drops slightly when he turns on the light to reveal a bathroom.

‘It’s nice’ You try to convince yourself, but your train of thought is cut off when a pair of heavy hands lay themselves on your jean-covered hips, pulling you closer to his body and trailing his lips up the side of your neck.

Your breath hitches and you let out a small, “Oh.”

“Do you still want this?” He murmurs into your ear once more, and you find yourself nodding rather enthusiastically, much to your embarrassment. Jimin just chuckles.

He spins you around, and your eyes land on the slope of his neck that disappears into his leather jacket. Fingers tuck themselves under your chin and force you to look at him.

“You’re a shy one.” He coos, and you shiver when his thumb caresses the corner of your mouth, dipping into it just a bit.

“I’m not used to this.” You admit with a self-deprecating grimace. “What a shame.” Is all he says before tilting your head back and connecting your lips.

The kiss is soft, softer than you would have expected from your soon to be hookup.

You’ve heard through the grapevine that he’s rather ferocious with his kissing, with spit and teeth, but somehow still making sure it's nice for his partner.

He cups your wrists and guides your hands to tangle themselves in his black mullet, and you’re relieved to be able to do something with your hands.

A whimper escapes you when his palms press you to him by the lower part of your back, turning you to the nearest wall for balance.

Soon, the kiss turns hungry, and you can feel the strain of him against his tight black pants, and you tremble, like putty in his hands.

You try your best to keep up with him, kissing back with a lot more fervour than you’ve ever done before.

You’ve had sex once, and that was just because you wanted to lose it before college, just so you could say you did it.

It was awkward because it was with one of the guys from your English class, and he looked like he didn’t know what he was doing either. It was stiff and it burned, and you weren’t sure if you were even turned on enough to participate in penetrative sex.

Well, the same can’t be said for you now, because you can feel the material of your panties grow damp with arousal, sticking to your folds and causing slight friction.

It’s when Jimin finally rolls his hips into yours is when you finally let out a true, loud moan.

“Thought you were going to be quiet all night.” Jimin teases, and you flush. “I - I’m sorry.” You mutter against his lips. 

He pulls back and strokes your cheek with the back of his knuckles. “Relax. ‘M just teasing.”

“Right, right.” You laugh demurely.

He lowers his head to the skin of your neck where he takes the skin of it between his teeth, and your hips buck into his on accident.

“Shit!” You curse, and you slap a hand over your mouth. “You like pain.” He says almost to himself. “Definitely noted.” 

You’re not sure what he means by that, but your mind seems to blank when his hands sneak their way to the button of your jeans, fiddling with the metal. That cursed thumb presses into the skin above the hem.

“Do you still want this?” 

“Yes, please.” You whimper. Jimin grins and you can feel it, because he places a gentle kiss on the surface. “How polite.”

You swallow a whine at his praise.

He pops them open with practiced ease, and pushes a hand into your pants, hissing when he comes in contact with your wetness.

“Fuck, you’re this wet just from kissing?” He asks in awe.

Jimin finally finds himself in your panties and you gasp when the tips of his fingers press on your clit.

“There it is.” He says to himself triumphantly.

He’s quick to flatten his hand, replacing the tips with the pads of his fingers, drawing quick but fast circles over the pleasurable bud.

“Jimin!” You cry, and your nails rake themselves through his hair, drawing him into you.

You hold him close as he rubs at you, and his free hand keeps himself balanced on the wall just above your hand, completely enveloping you with his body.

“Feels so good.” You mewl, and he nearly growls.

“God, you’re so cute.” He groans.

He takes his hand away and your eyes furrowed in confusion. Was it something you said?

You don't have much time to think because you’re being spun around and bent over the counter, and you’re face to face with your debauched features. 

“Jimin?” You ask, but you’re cut off by him snatching your pants and underwear down your hips and they pool at your ankles. 

You threaten to turn a scarlet red when he spreads your legs as far as they can go and just stares at your sex.

“Such a pretty pussy.” He rasps and you shiver.

He looks up and meets your gaze in the mirror, making to take his leather jacket off.

“‘M gonna fuck you with my fingers, then I’m actually gonna fuck you. Sounds good?”

“Amazing.” You squeak.

He presses his hand on your lower back to keep you anchored to the marble counter, while the other slips a finger in till he reaches the knuckle.

Your jaw drops in a silent moan, the slight stretch of it hurts for a moment, but your body soon adjusts to it, because he draws it out, no wonder noticing how it glistens in the dim lighting.

Then, he thrusts it back in, over and over and over again until a second one finds its place next to it.

The sounds that escape your cunt are disgusting, and you cross your arms to bury your head in them. 

You’ve never felt pleasure like this before, and when he curls his fingers just right, you all but wail.

“Found it.” 

He abuses your g-spot with a certain kind of cruelty, and an arm slips out from under you to scratch at the surface of the counter. Of course you don’t leave any marks, but the bluntness of your nails make it a makeshift anchor to this earth.

“Just listen to you.” He huffs. “She’s so sloppy.”

“Don’t – don’t say that.” You whine in humiliation. 

“Why not?” There’s amusement in his voice, and you hate how it makes another of arousal leak around his digits.

“‘Cause that’s dirty.” 

Jimin laughs. He actually fucking laughs and all you can think about is crawling into a hole forever.

“There’s a lot about me that’s dirty, sweetheart.”

You shake at the nickname, and he notices.

“Oh? You like it when I call you that?”

The condescension in his voice pushes you closer to the edge, and you can feel that familiar knot form in your stomach, the one you’re only able to create by yourself.

You clench around him and he gawffs.

“It seems like I’m not the only one that’s dirty.” He remarks. “What else should I call you?” He acts like he’s thinking as he twists his wrist into you without mercy, your legs shake.

There’s tears threatening to stream down your face.

“Hm. What about babe, or baby? Oh! Better yet, how about darling? Hm? Would you like that darling?”

Hearing him call you such sweet names does something to you, because before you know it, you’re catapulted over the edge. You spasm around him, and he just hums.

“There you go, good girl. That’s it.”

You shake as you come down from your high, and there are hands stroking the outside of your thighs, up your hips, and back down again.

Your eyes flutter open from where they squeezed themselves shut to find he’s already looking at you. His gaze is dripping in dark black molasses sticky with lust and want.

“Can we keep going, or are you at your limit?” Jimin checks in ever so gently. 

It makes you feel good knowing that he likes to make sure you know you’re still in control, and despite just having orgasmed, you find yourself painstakingly empty.

“‘M really good.” You slur, and a proud smile takes over his face.

He fumbles with the back of his jeans, and retrieves his wallet where he pulls out a condom from it. You eye it warily.

“I just put it in there yesterday, I promise.”

He makes work of his jeans, and you notice that he’s so so hard, and you almost feel bad for the poor man. Almost being the keyword, because when he releases himself from the confines of his boxers, you gape.

He’s averagely long, maybe even a little moreso, but god, is he thick.

He catches you staring and winks.

“Think you can take it?” He pokes and you huff. “Of course I can.”

He raises a brow at you, but rolls the condom on in a tortuously slow pace.

“Hurry up.” You whine, and he swats your ass.

“Be patient.” He chides with a hiss, but you’re still reeling from the sting of the slap to even comprehend what he just said.

Jimin settles a hand on your shoulder, the other helping him line himself up to your sopping wet entrance.

“Ready?” 

“Mhm.”

You both watch each other as he splits you open on his cock, and his head falls back as he groans through his clenched teeth.

“Oh!” You quiver on his length, reaching back to grab one of his hands and breathing out a sigh of relief when he meets you halfway.

He’s twitching inside of you, and you appreciate the few moments to gather your bearings.

“Move, please.” You mewl, and he doesn’t hesitate to listen to you.

Jimin drags himself out, breaking your eye contact to look down at where you’re wrapped around him. You’re so wet, the velvet of your gummy walls are making him feel a little faint.

Then, he thrusts back in until his hips are to your ass, and then he repeats, just for a few slow moments before picking up the pace.

The hand on shoulder pulls you down to meet his thrusts, and you cry out.

“Shit, Jimin!” 

“I know, I know – Fuck, you feel so good.”

His plowing is brutal, the tip of his cock spearing and bullying your g-spot with a pace that you can’t quite keep up with.

He releases your shoulder to grab each arm to help his leverage, and your eyes roll into the back of your head. You’re sure you’re drooling, but you can’t find much shame in it because it feels so good.

You know that Jimin has ruined you for anybody else, mind, body, and soul, and you’re not sure how you’re supposed to escape him now.

His grunts and groans are guttural, and you know he’s close. You encourage him by clenching around him.

“God – what happened to the shy girl I met in the living room, huh?” He pants. “All I see now a cock hungry slut.”

You let out a surprised moan at his words.

“Oh, yeah? You like when I call you that? Like when I let you know exactly what you look like?”

“Y-yes.” Is your garbled reply.

“Aw… is my baby too cock drunk to even respond?” Jimin tuts meanly. “That’s okay, because I’ve got you, right?”

He’s giving you whiplash with the mix of his words, and you miss the way he calls you his baby.

“Oh, shit I’m close.” He announces. “You gonna let me cum in this tight little cunt of yours?”

“Mhm! Mhm! Gonna –” You hiccup. “Gonna let you do whatever you want.

That seems to soothe something possessive inside of him because he finally cums, and the pulsing of him against that spongy spot inside of you grows to be too much, because you follow right behind him.

It’s quiet in the bathroom as you both stop to catch your breaths, but he pulls out after a few moments of silence, tying up the condom and tossing it into the trashcan next to the toilet without a care.

“You okay?” He asks as he makes to pull up his jeans, and you’re kind of just… stunned.

Is that it?

“Uh… yeah, I’m alright.” You try not to let the disappointment show on your face as you reach down and tug your pants on as well.

Your arms ache from the strange position they were forced into, as well as your stomach from where it had been digging into the ledge of the counter.

“Good.” Gently pushes you out the way so he can wash his hands.

You just stare at him flabbergasted, kind of at a complete loss at what to say.

Do you ask what you are now? Did this mean anything? Were you just another hookup? Were you –

You’re cut off by soft lips meeting yours, and your stomach flutters something pleasant.

Maybe he did like you back and this was a complete misunderstanding, maybe he –

“Call me if you’d like to have some fun again, yeah?”

He speaks against your mouth.

Somehow he’s managed to scribble down his number and hand it to you, which you take somewhat blindly.

He’s already out of the door before you can blink, sending you a cheeky wave as he disappears into the crowd once more.

Your experience with him already feels like a dream when one of your friends drapes themselves over you.

“Finally found you!” She says with a giggle. “Where were you? Me and Sana have been looking everywhere.”

You cringe as you remember your duty, but before you can respond, her nose scrunches up.

“God you stink. Did you have sex?” She asks in disgust.

“No.” You say with a few blinks. “It’s probably because of the party.”

“Oh… okay.” She giggles.

You’re ashamed to say you’ve met up with him a few times after that, finally having the courage to give him a call after a particularly hard day of finals.

He sure did fuck the stress out of you.

This wasn’t how you imagined yourself finding your way into his world, but if sex was the only way you could have him then so be it.

But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

He still met up with other girls, still blew you off, still kept you as a secret from his friends. You were just another notch on his bedpost, and it made you almost sick to think about.

Time spent with him after sex was just… confusing.

Someday’s he would allow you to stay over afterwards, maybe even asking you to watch a movie with him, or sometimes he would talk around you leaving until you eventually caught the hint.

It was such a push and pull relationship, and you had no idea what all of this was for.

Were you friends? Acquaintances? Fuck buddies? Friends with benefits?

You had no idea what you were or who he wanted to mean to you, but it was slowly ripping you apart.

He had invited you to another party after a particularly long session, and maybe it was just the sleepiness in him talking, but it almost sounded as if he wanted you to be there.

He nuzzles his face into your shoulder, the black of his hair sticking to his forehead due to the sweat.

You nibble on your lip, tugging the duvet up to cover your bare breasts.

The tips of his fingers graze your arm gently even though his eyes were closed, and goosebumps rose under his ministrations.

It was moments like these that you grew fond of because of how few and far in between they were, when Jimin allows that vulnerable side of his to peek through. You found him beautiful.

You couldn’t stop staring at him, even when the muscles in your neck protested the awkward angle.

You could count every freckle on his cheek, every eyelash he had, and you had to bite back a smile at the sight of his crooked front tooth peeking out through his swollen plump lips.

“Mm.” He groans, and forces himself to crack an eye open. 

Your eyes flutter in embarrassment at almost being caught, but he seems none the wiser. 

“(y/n).” Jimin mumbles. You find a way to wind your arm around his neck, settling a hand in his hair, rolling the ends of the damp strands between your fingers.

“Come to this party ‘m throwing.” Jimin slurs.

You finally allow yourself to smile then. “Why? I’d like to think last time was a bit of a mess.” You tease. He just grumbles. “Never feels like a mess when I’m with you.”

Your smile quickly falls.

It was crowded once again, but you felt a sort of superiority at your fucked up relationship with him.

You went searching around for him; maybe you guys could actually talk this time! Maybe share a beer and talk about your favorite music!

Your body thrummed with all the different types of things you could do when you found him, but not in the way you wanted.

He had another girl pushed up against the wall, just like he had you in the bathroom on that fateful day.

‘But he wasn’t kissing her how he had kissed you’ You tried to reason with yourself, even as tears began to form in your eyes.

This was embarrassing. So fucking embarrassing.

You were so much better than this. You were a smart girl, you had things going for you, your life shouldnt revolve around a man who could not give any less of a fuck about you.

You find yourself stumbling away - backwards might you add - and you accidentally bump into someone, their liquor spilling over and down the back of your shirt.

You yelp, and it’s loud enough to catch Jimin’s attention, but you don’t notice because of how fast you spin around to face the person. 

“Oh God, I’m so sorry!”

“Sorry, sorry!”

You and the stranger speak at the same time, and you look up to find that he was quite… handsome.

He was tall, broad shouldered and obviously thick under that sweatervest he was wearing - which fuck it was too hot for that, even for you - and dimples settled into his cheeks and glasses that were raised high on his face, perched on his nose.

“No, no!” You wave away his apology nervously. “It’s fine! It’s my fault, I didn’t see where I was looking!”

“I shouldn’t have been carrying so many open drinks at the same time when I knew how crowded this place was, so it’s okay.”

You just watch as a genuine smile seems to spread on his face.

“How about this: we're both at fault, and we're sorry. Does that sound good?”

You find yourself nodding with a small smile. “Yeah… that sounds good.”

He stares at you, and you stare back, but then your eyes fall on a dark stain on his vest. His eyes seem to follow your gaze because he tries to wave you away this time.

“Hey, listen, it’s fine, it happens all the time! I’d say you took the brunt of it. How about you come with me, and I’ll get you a new shirt?”

Going with a guy that you’ve never met before to “get a new shirt” doesn’t seem like a good idea, but the image of Jimin plastered to that girl is all but tattooed on the back of your eyelids.

“Okay, yeah.”

The man’s smile gets bigger, but then falls as his gaze flickers to something behind you. Your brows furrow in concern, but before you can turn around, an arm slides itself around your waist.

“I think I’ve got it from here. Thanks man.”

You’re surprised to see Jimin next to you all but glaring at the tall man’s face, and there’s a prickle of irritation in your gut. The weight of his arm on you feels like a hot iron with the way it burns, and you step out of his grip just slightly.

The guy seems to notice, because his gaze narrows right back at him.

“Is this guy bothering you?” He asks.

Your eyes widen at the sight of the dog fight that might happen before you, and you just sigh.

“No, it’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure…” You let your voice die out, and the guy seems to make the connection.

“Namjoon. Kim Namjoon.”

You grin slightly. “(y/n).”

“Great. Bye, Kim Namjoon. Thanks for ruining her shirt.”

Jimin tugs you along behind him, and he’s silent the whole way to his room, and you’re half tempted to snatch yourself from his grip.

“What’s your problem?” You ask once you’re finally safe behind closed doors.

“What do you mean what’s my problem?” Jimin’s voice is hiding a thin layer of anger that you can hear clearly.

“You were such an asshole to him! And he didn’t “ruin” my shirt by the way. It’s just beer. It’ll get out.”

“That doesn’t matter. You were about to fuck off and go with some guy you didn’t even know!” He throws his hands up in the air like it’s obvious.

“Okay? It’s my business on who I go and “fuck off” with. The guy looked nice, so I trusted him.”

He scoffs. “Oh yeah, so you just trust any guy that asks you to leave with him? It’s so obvious he wanted to fuck you, and you were just going to do it with a smile on your face.”

You stare at him in disbelief. “You can’t be serious right now.” You breathe.

“Very.” He says flatly.

You encroach in his space, getting in his face and settling him with a glare.

“I came to look for you at a fucking party you invited me to, and then I find you with your tongue down some random girl’s throat.” You sneer. “So forgive me if I’m a little peeved that you’re bothered by who I might go fuck.”

Jimin doesn’t know why he’s so bothered. ‘Doesn’t know why seeing you laughing and smiling with that guy makes something in his gut twist in disgust.

“I don’t like him.”

You lean your face away from his.

“That’s what you’ve taken away from this.” You let out an incredulous laugh, and the amusement behind your eyes is fake.

“I…” You shake your head. “I can’t believe this.”

“You are not who I thought you were.” Something in you wilts. “You are a grade A asshole, Park Jimin.” You spit his name like it’s a slur, and something inside him dies.

“What?” It’s his turn to scoff. “Don’t tell me you like me or something?” He knows he’s being mean, but he’s hurt, and he feels as though he has nothing else left.

“Excuse me?” You look like a kid who got caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Guilty.

There’s a sickening pleasure that takes root in his heart knowing that you want him like that.

“You’re doing this whole weird, possessive girlfriend thing.” It’s his turn to step in your space. 

“Well, sorry to say, but were just fuck buddies. I don’t want to be with you. All I want you for is a booty call, nothing more, nothing less.”

His words are like a knife to your heart and you deflate.

The tears burning behind your eyes finally fall, and your hand twitches at your side.

“I fucking hate you.” Is all you can say.

You push him out your way and he lets you, watches as you leave.

‘Good’ He thinks.

He tries to convince himself that the quicker he cuts this thing off, the easier things will get, because he doesn’t like you like that.

Right?

Right.

Your head was pounding by the time you had found your way back to your dorm, your shaking hands made it near impossible to get the key in the lock, but you managed it.

You hadn’t expected Sana to be there, bed engulfed by books and different studying utensils.

“Hey.” She greets mindlessly, flicking through papers in a certain folder before huffing and closing it when she clearly doesn’t find what she needs.

Your grip on your keys grows weak and they clatter to the floor, and she looks up in alarm, just as you take in a loud, pitiful sniffle.

“Oh, (y/n).” 

She scrambles to get up and you fall forward, trusting her to catch you, and she does, even if she’s extremely confused.

You’re sobbing into her shirt, and your chest twists and everything just hurts.

Jimin’s words feel like a slap in your face, and your heart burns like you had actually been slapped. You would have preferred that if you were going to be honest.

“(y/n), please. You have to tell me what’s wrong.”

“I liked him.” You sob. “I liked him so much, and, and, and –” You’re close to hyperventilating at this point, and Sana just seems to grow more anxious, because she pulls away from you and cups your cheeks.

“You need to breathe for me.” She says with a nervous albeit reassuring smile. 

You attempt to take a deep breath. 

“Good, that’s good, just keep trying.”  

Eventually, your breathing evens out, and she leads you over to your twin bed, seeing as hers is a bit of an organized mess right now.

“Now, can you finally explain to me what happened?”

Your hands shake as you make to pick at your cuticles, but she catches the habit before you can get to it, encasing your hands in hers.

“There’s a lot of things that you don’t know.”

“Okay…”

“But you know I like Jimin, right?”

“Mhm, like… big time.”

“Well, do you remember that party that you and your friend forced me to?” 

“Mhm.”

“Well… while I was waiting for you guys to be ready to go, Jimin approached me.”

“Oh my god?” She says excitedly, but you give her a sad smile.

“Don’t get excited just yet.”

“Anyways,” You continue. “He talked to me, then invited me to… you know, sleep with him.” Your cheeks burn as Sana stares at you dumbfounded, but you keep going. “The sex was great, don’t get me wrong, but he was so distant after everything was done.”

“He gave me his number and asked me to call him if I ever wanted to hook up with him again.”

“Douche.”

“Sana.”

“Sorry not sorry.”

You laugh a bit and she grins, relieved.

“Well, I did.”

“(y/n).” She sighs, releasing one of her hands to rub at her forehead.

“I know, I know! I also know I’m gonna sound really stupid when I say that I thought he actually liked me, but he… but he said some things to me tonight that really broke my heart.”

“Before we get to that, what made you think he likes you back?” She wasn’t trying to be mean by asking the question, you knew better. 

“Because there’ll be moments after we are done hooking up where he’d be super sweet. Like, sometimes he would cuddle me, or ask me to watch a movie, just things outside of the common hookup aftercare.”

“But then tonight,” You sighed. “I went to the party he invited me to, and caught him making out with some other girl, and so I went to leave but then I bumped into this guy.” You smile a bit at the memory.

“His name is Kim Namjoon, and he was super sweet – spilled a fuckton of beer on my shirt though.”

“So that’s why you smell like that.” 

“Yep.” You laugh. “And then Jimin came up and acted all… jealous and possessive and shit. Took me up to his room, we argued, he accused me of liking him and laughed in my face and called me just his fuck buddy after I didn’t deny that I did.”

You look up to find Sana seething.

“I’m going to call Taehyung.”

Taehyung was one of Jimin’s best friends, and he was currently groveling at Sana’s feet trying to be with her. Though she likes him, she wants to make him work for it just to see if he’ll lose interest, even though you know it’d kill her if he actually did.

“Why?”

“To break it off with him in solidarity.”

“What?!” You asked incredulously. “No, absolutely not. Taehyung is a good guy. You don’t need to do that for me.”

She regards you with a raised brow.

“Are you sure?”

You find yourself nodding. “Kinda need some roomie time right now.” Your eyes fall to her studying materials. “But if you’re too busy, I –”

“Nope. Let’s go.”

You laugh joyously as she begins to put her things away, and you make for the small fridge in your room where your sweet treats are held. 

Maybe things are going to be okay.

The next week is like a living hell.

You’ve basically made it your life’s mission to avoid Jimin as much as possible. You had already blocked him after a few encouraging words from Sana.

She still ended up calling Taehyung in the end, putting him in the dog house until his friend got his shit together. You could almost hear his pout as he begged her not to. She hung up on him.

The weather was nice, with early spring wandering around, you could finally start to wear flowier clothing, as well as study outside again.

Your head is so immersed in your book that you don’t see someone approach your table until a finger gently breaches your line of vision and taps the page.

You startle a bit and look up, and you're greeted by Namjoon’s sheepish face.

“Sorry, I didn’t know another way to get your attention, you looked really focused.”

“That’s sweet, but it’s okay. You could’ve interrupted me.” He gestures to the seat across from yours. “Can I sit?”

“Yeah, yeah! Go ahead!” You begin clearing things out of his way, and he smiles gratefully.

“I didn’t see you again after you left.” With that guy, is what’s unspoken, but you caught it anyways. “Yeah… uh – something came up, so I had to leave early.

His mouth forms an ‘o’ shape and he nods. “I see.”

“Yeah.” You grimace.

“Well I –” Namjoon swallows nervously. “I wasn’t able to tell you, but I think you’re beautiful.”

Your eyes widen. “Oh.” You breathe in surprise, and the man visibly deflates. “Unless that guy was your boyfriend, then I’m sorry! Oh, God, I should have asked first.”

“No, no! He’s not my boyfriend.” You reassure him. “‘M surprised, is all; and very, very flattered.”

You know you should reject his advances, but you’re hurt, and he’s just… so sweet. A complete contrast to Jimin, and you think he’s the change of pace that you needed.

“I think you’re handsome if that makes you feel any better.” The words feel wrong coming out of your mouth, but you grin nonetheless when his cheeks warm an admirable red.

“I…” You meet each other's eyes, and look down at the same time, laughing shyly.

Maybe Namjoon could be good for you.

“You look pathetic, man.” Taehyung speaks through a mouthful of instant ramen disgustingly.

Jimin hits him upside the back of his head, and the poor boy winces.

“Ow!”

“Don’t forget you’re in the dog house too, idiot.” Jungkook mumbles from his side of the table.

“So what you’re telling me is that you want me to beat your ass?”

“I’m just saying.” He shrugs. “Hyung fucked up, and now you’re being punished by association. No (y/n) means no Sana.” 

Jungkook’s right.

Ever since that night, Jimin’s desperately been trying to forget about you, about how hurt you looked. He almost feels sick thinking about it.

He admits that he could have handled that situation a lot better, but it was like something had taken over him. As soon as he’d seen you with Namjoon, and how willing you looked, something inside him just… snapped.

“I’m just waiting for hyung to admit that he was jealous and go and fix it.” Taehyung says simply. “It’s obvious that he’s in love with her, and I have no idea why he won’t just go and tell her.”

“I’m not -” Jimin hissed, “In love with her.”

“Yeah man, you are.”

Jimin’s eyes narrowed, but his attention was stolen by your laugh.

You were laughing because of him.

You looked so sickeningly demure talking to him, wringing your fingers together and kicking out your legs as a nervous tick. You usually only ever did that when you were with him.

Jimin liked the effect that he had on you.

He liked how your eyelashes fluttered when he complimented you, how you held on to him when he fucked you, how you kissed him back like you meant it. Sure, your body was nice, but so was your personality.

You were kind, studious, selfless, and he wasn’t sure what drew you to him the first night he had met you.

He thought that your hidden affections were all for him, but it proves that he was mistaken. That’s fine. You could be with anybody that you wanted to.

‘Just not him’ Is supplied unhelpfully.

The thought shouldn’t bother him as much as it does.

It’s just… Jimin doesn’t do the whole commitment thing. The last time he had a partner, it blew up in his face, so he just finds that casual one night stands was just the easier way to go.

But things between you and him were never casual to begin with, huh?

“Listen,” Taehyung starts once more, and points his chopsticks at Jungkook. “Jimin-hyung, he'll realize what he wants when it’s too late. Girls like (y/n) don’t come around as often as they should.” Then, he dives back into his noodles.

Jimin’s eyebrows furrowed. Were they right?

He turns his head to look at them. “Was it ever casual between me and her?” He can’t help but ask.

“No.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Wow, okay.”

“I mean, you let her sleep in your bed, hyung.” Jungkook basically scoffs. “You’ve never let any of your hookups stay the night, or cuddle with you; yet somehow she’s different.”

Different.

That was the key word here.

You were different.

The last few weeks with Namjoon have been nice.

The man was smart, and kind, and overall just a sweet, gentle giant that deserved everything in the world; but you knew deep down in your heart that you couldn’t be the one to give him that.

You saw it in the way that he looked at you, starry-eyed on his worst day, and heart-eyed the best. You can’t find it within yourself to feel flattered by it anymore, because you know that you don’t deserve it.

You don’t deserve his chivalry, his affection, and maybe - hopefully not - his love.

You’re ashamed to say that this whole rebound business blew up in your face like you went ahead and personally strapped the bomb to yourself.

You didn’t know how to tell him you didn’t like him like that, just how you had no idea how to tell Jimin you loved him after months of sleeping with him; exactly how that fateful night you said yes instead of no.

The words on the pages in front of you bled together like a big blob of ink, and Namjoon’s large foot snuck over to yours under the table and trapped it playfully.

You tried not to allow the grin you gave him to look like a grimace, even as he acted like he was reading as well. You were sure both of your reasons were entirely different.

You needed to put a stop to this, you needed to tell him you didn’t see him that way and you just wanted to be friends.

“Hey, Namjoon –”

“Do you want to go on a date with me?”

“Of course.”

Fuck. 

The look that Namjoon gave you was beaming, and you felt tears sting at the back of your eyelids.

You said yes to a date like the stupid, idiotic, selfish, terrible person you are. 

Namjoon had offered to walk you back to your dorm after your study session was over, but you couldn’t look at him anymore, the guilt crawling around in your stomach becoming something almost too much to handle.

“No thanks, Nammy.”

“Okay.” He pouts a bit. “But you be safe, alright?”

For the first time today, you gave him a true smile. “I will!”

The walk back to your dorm was slow, and heavy hearted, and you were so lost in your head, you couldn’t see that you were about to walk into someone until their hand shot out and caught you.

“Oh!” You squeaked, your head shooting up.

Your eyes widened at a very disgruntled looking Jimin.

He didn’t look as put together as he used to; his black mullet ruffled out of place and his black leather jacket rather wrinkly. 

“(y/n).” He spoke.

It had felt like forever since you heard his voice, and it took you everything in your power to not shut your eyes and bask in it.

You swallowed heavily. “I have nothing to say to you.”

“But I do.”

“That’s not how this works.”

“(y/n) please.”

You stare at him before huffing and crossing your arms. “Fine.”

“Thank you.” He breathes, and you finally notice how close you are, because you stumble back to finally put some space in between the two of you. If Jimin’s hurt by the action, he doesn’t show it.

You hate how much that bothers you.

“I fucked up.”

“No.” You instantly put a hand out to stop him. “You don’t get to say that to me.”

“What?”

“You started this whole thing, Jimin! I… I admit that I do like you, and I’ve liked you for a long time, but you don’t get to be the one to say you “fucked up” and regret everything you did.”

“Why not?” He asks, almost offended.

“Because you’ll never change!”

Jimin looks taken aback by your outburst. 

“You’ll tell me you’re sorry, we’ll fuck, and then it’ll be this process all over again. You don’t get to just do that! I need full commitment, and that’s not something you’re able to give me.”

“Plus,” You continue, taking in a deep breath. “I’m seeing someone right now.”

Jimin fucking snorts.

“Don’t tell me you have a date with the Namkim guy.”

“It’s Namjoon, and yes, I am. He’s nice.”

“Oh, is that it? He’s just nice?”

“And… and he’s smart too!” You exclaim almost petulantly. “He gives me flowers and tells me how much he likes me all the time, unlike you, who’s so emotionally constipated that not even laxatives would be able to help you!”

“Wha –” Jimin laughs in disbelief. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me! I’m gonna go on a date with a guy who actually likes me!”

You straighten your tote bag on your shoulder and brace yourself, straightening your posture.

“Now if you excuse me, I have a date to plan for, and homework to do.”

“What? (y/n)! Come back, I’m sorry!”

“No!”

You’re not going to lie and say you didn’t replay your entire interaction with Jimin for the rest of the week.

There was something about talking to him that gave you the energy to get through class, the haunting realization that maybe he was worth a damn. 

Wondering what would have happened if you had allowed him to apologize instead of cutting him off, of accepting his apology and allowing yourself to be with him in that way.

But you know, you know that if you were to go back to your old routine with him, it’d kill you. It’d kill you to watch him flirt with other people, or watch him take them home.

You fiddled with the strap of your dress, staring at yourself in the mirror and feeling awkward at the fact that the material only looked good if you didn’t wear a bra.

You were going to a restaurant with Namjoon; it was a nice, original first date idea. You’d talk over food, and get along just fine!

Namjoon was a nice guy. He was sweet, and he wouldn’t try to fuck you on the first date.

Oh, God, would he?

You really hope not.

“Damn girl.” Sana whistles from her spot on her bed. “You look sexy! You’re gonna blow that nerd’s socks off!”

“Sana.” You warned. “Be nice! He’s not a nerd. He’s just studious.”

“Sure. Every Philosophy major is studious.” She giggles to herself.

“Oh! Do you think he’s a virgin?!”

“Sana!” This time it’s a whine, but your arguing is interrupted by a couple knocks on the door.

“Oh, God, it’s him!” You whisper in a panic. 

You continue to mess with the front of your dress, pulling the hem up at the top to try and hide as much boobage as possible.

“Stop!” Your roommate hisses. “You look great!”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah! Now go!”

You waddle over to the door and pull it open, your heart melting at the sight of a good looking Namjoon in front of you.

His hair was tastefully rumpled, a button up shirt tucked into a pair of slacks that hugged his thighs deliciously.

Wow, you were really hogging this man for yourself.

There was another stab of guilt when his eyes fell on your figure and he swallowed, his cheeks painting themselves an adorable pink. 

“W – wow, (y/n). You look amazing.”

“Thanks.” You say shyly. “Should we go?”

“Oh! Of course, of course!” 

He offers you his arm and you take it.

The conversation between the two of you was kept light, even as you got into the Uber that he had paid for.

“I uh – I don’t have my license.” Namjoon had sheepishly admitted to you one day.

He usually rode his bike to places, so you were surprised to see that he had splurged for today.

Shame burns in your gut once again.

(y/n): 0, Guilt and shame: the winner.

The restaurant was nice as you were led to your table, and very quiet.

You shuffled around in your seat, sheepishly ordering water as Namjoon looked over the menu.

“I’m so happy we're doing this.” Namjoon says after you get your drinks, and you sip on the freezing tap water.

“Yeah…” You speak after a few hefty gulps of your drink.

“I meant it when I said you looked gorgeous tonight.”

“Ah…” You fluster. “Where did all this confidence come from?”

“It comes from me wanting to ask you a question that you’ll answer truthfully.”

Instantly your heart falls into your ass, because you know exactly what’s coming.

“I might be a bit of a stick in the mud, but that doesn’t mean I’m blind, (y/n).”

“I can see that you haven’t really been in any of… whatever we have going on. And I’m not even going to lie, I don’t even think we’ve had anything to begin with.”

“What gave it away?” You ask with a grimace. “That.”

“That?”

“That thing you do with your face when you lie.”

You blink at him in surprise.

“Oh.”

“And you’ve done it every single time I’ve tried to flirt or compliment you. I’m surprised you even agreed to go out with me.”

“I…” You feel like you’re going to throw up. “I swear I didn’t mean to lead you on! There’s just been this thing, and I can’t tell you what it is –”

“Yes you can.”

“Pardon?” You ask in surprise.

“You know exactly why you can’t commit fully to this.”

“I…” You deflate in your seat, fiddling with the napkin. “You’re right.”

“It’s that guy, right? The one from the party?” 

Namjoon’s words aren’t hurt, judgemental, or angry, they’re just factual. Like how he gets when he breaks down a piece of difficult text in one of his ancient little books he likes to read.

“I should start from the beginning shouldn’t I?”

“We’ve got all night.”

So you do. You start from that night at the party, over how you’ve felt these last few weeks, even as the food had come and gone, you two hadn’t stopped talking.

You had refused to let him pay at the end of the night, and you literally almost had to fight him over splitting the bill.

“This was supposed to be a date.” He speaks with a pout, and you just laugh. 

You two worked well as friends, because you nudged his foot. “Yah! We can go on another date soon, okay?”

He just laughs with a shake of his head.

When you guys leave, you offer to pay for your shared Uber when you spot someone you weren’t expecting.

Jimin’s in the parking lot, leaning against his car and looking around. When his gaze lands on you, his slouched position straightens, and your heart stutters in your chest.

“This guy is like the fucking boogeyman.” You murmur, and Namjoon laughs once more.

“I uh… may have sort of called him here.”

Your head whips around and you stare at him in betrayal. “What?!”

“Listen. You and him have some shit to work out, and - bless your heart - we both know you don’t have a backbone, so I think it would be better if you both fixed this, or ended it for good.”

You can’t help but just stare at him. “Where did you even get his number?”

“Taehyung. The poor man’s been practically begging me to leave you alone and let Jimin fix this because he’s been sexiled.”

You sigh, glancing over at a waiting Jimin who’s watching you hopefully.

“You won’t be here for solidarity, will you?”

“For both our sakes, I think you know the answer to that.”

You swallow, turning your attention back to him. “I really am sorry about how everything went down between us. You’re a great guy, and I’m sure one day another person will be able to see that. I’m sorry it’s not me.”

He shrugs his shoulders. “It’s alright, I need to worry about my studies anyways.”

You smile sadly at him, and he just chuckles and shakes his head, pulling you into his warm embrace.

“I mean it (y/n),” He starts when you separate, “It’s okay, but you need to go, because Jimin looks like he’s about to throttle me, and I’m not really interested in fighting someone tonight. I have a test in the morning.”

Your smile is a little less sad this time, and he waves you off.

The walk to Jimin feels like a walk to doom; it’s silent, tense, and you’re unsure about where you’ll end up at the end of the night.

“Hi.” You breathe awkwardly. You grasp onto your clutch purse like a lifeline.

“Hey.”

“Uh…” You begin, but Jimin just sighs, opening the passenger door, and gesturing for you to get in. “We need to talk.”

Your shoulders deflate. “Alright.”

Even though he said you needed to talk, the car ride is silent, even as you watch yourself being pulled into a parking lot, the man stopping and turning his car off.

“So, are you going to let me speak this time, or are you just going to cut me off again?”

You scowl. “Is that really how you want to start this conversation?”

“No, no, fuck I’m sorry. I’m already fucking it up.” His hands grip the steering wheel, twisting them around nervously.

“I’m not used to this.”

“Used to what?”

“Dating, feelings, that kind of thing. And I thought that if I hurt you, and never had to see you again, that those things would just go away, but they didn’t.”

He slumps back in his seat, casting his gaze out the window before turning his attention towards you.

“When I saw you with him –”

“Namjoon.”

“Yes,” He all but hisses, “With Namjoon, I felt sick to my stomach. Like something was wrong, like he was taking something from me.”

“But I was never yours to begin with.”

“Yeah,” He sighs. “I know, and that’s the issue.”

“You were right about me being an asshole, because I was. I projected all of my weird, little possessive feelings onto you and totally flipped out when I should have just talked to you.”

“But instead I pushed you away, said things I didn’t mean, and you still went with that guy, and I felt horrible.” Jimin hesitantly reaches out a hand – an olive branch of sorts – and waits for you to take it.

He hopes you take it.

You look at him and back down to his hand, before lifting yours and intertwining your fingers.

“What are you trying to tell me, Jimin? Because… because if we do this friends-with-benefits bullshit again, I think it’ll actually kill me.”

“I don’t think I could handle that even if I tried.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that seeing you with the other people that aren't me makes me feel sick to my stomach, and I’d rather have you all to myself like the nasty, greedy bastard I am.”

“Like a boyfriend.”

Jimin finally smiles.

That beautiful, eye closing smile that makes your heart skip a beat too many.

“Yeah, (y/n), like a boyfriend.”

“Does that make me your girlfriend?”

“I would sure hope so.”

You grin as well, happiness painting over your features as you watch him.

“What does this mean for us now?” He leans forward into your space, and this time you don’t move back, just gazing up at him with wide, curious eyes. “This means that you’ll hopefully let me kiss you.”

“Well lucky for you, I’m feeling nice tonight.”

He snorts and rolls his eyes, yet connects your lips together. Your eyelids flutter shut.

Euphoria. That’s the only feeling you could describe after feeling the plushness of his mouth after so long. It’s felt like centuries since you’ve touched him, and every nerve in your body lights aflame.

You tangle your fingers in his hair, and his hands cup your jaw, tugging you to him over the center console.

“I can’t go that far.” You pant with a chuckle, and he huffs a small smile.

“Backseat?”

“Please don’t tell me you want to have makeup sex in the backseat of your car in the middle of the park.”

“You want to have makeup sex?” His eyes glimmer. It’s your turn to snort. “I thought that was obvious.”

“Then no, we're absolutely not doing that here.”

“Then let’s get out of here.”

“Yes ma’am.”

© yoongsriverandme 2025-26

[animentality]

Tbh I think it's still legit if you read and like Blue Lock for being so gay (at least subtextually), despite being misogynistic Kaneshiro seems to have sympathy for queer people to a certain degree. Besides the gay sidekick, As The Gods Will also has some other queer side characters (a lesbian, a trans girl, a few more hinted gay boys and a non-binary villain according to my memory) even though not all of them are well-written, the good ones are good. Specifically my most favorite is the gay sidekick Ushimitsu, he's actually a pretty well-rounded character with very strong role as a co-lead in ATGW 2, I never feel like he was disrespected in the story (rather I think he's obviously Kaneshiro's favorite), sure he's got an open ending that can be seen as tragic but it's actually in line of the whole theme of the story and I respect Kaneshiro to commit to writing it rather than just give a copout happy ending and it also proves his gay feelings as real & deep despite heartbreaking.

Now I wish Kaneshiro can have that same energy in writing Bachira as he's in a similar position to Ushimitsu in ATGW but somehow poor bee boy got pushed aside in bllk after U20 arc (probably in favor of more popular Isagi ship with Rin or Kaiser 🙃), I hope he makes good on the promise that Bachira will be a key character later in the series and this time since nobody will die in Bllk I hope Bachisagi will get a deserved happy ending.

well that's the thing, anon.

I feel bad for liking blue lock because it has such a misogynistic creator but it's hard not to cling to something so obviously queer friendly.

like honestly.

there's definitely Japanese media that's queer neutral or queer friendly but blue lock actually feels like it's always on the verge of just being properly queer.

it's not fanservice like free or yuri on ice. it legitimately feels as close to canon as it can get without changing genres. and I think the creator having queer characters in the past gives him some street cred.

i know what homophobia in a manga looks like. it's that awful rapist character from one punch man. this hyper masculine but also hyper feminine muscly man who sexually assaults other men.

it's tokyo ghoul having its only queer characters being pedophiles, rapists, and sex addicts/victims who get sexually assaulted until they're "corrected."

it's having no subtext at all and only ever using gay men as a one off joke and gay women as a fetish.

at least blue lock does seem to respect its characters enough that it takes their hinted at sexualities seriously.

it really doesn't go for the obvious "ewwwwww we're both guys" jokes. it's kept very ambiguous. it's subtle (except when it's not, lol).

the only character who really fits the usual offensive gay anime representation tropes is Shidou, but even him I wouldn't count as bad rep (as the closest to canonically gay character, aside from Bachira).

Shidou might be super flamboyant but he also gets to have the coolest fucking moments in the series. he's not just some pervert, he's a badass. he doesn't just flounder around like some useless weird loser who only exists to be the butt of a joke.

he loves to fight and play soccer and feel alive. he has the coolest aura in the series and everyone is constantly in awe of the ridiculous things he can do.

he's a proper villain, who's out of pocket and insane, but who's also intensely lovable and silly. and honestly portrayed pretty sympathetically. for all his faults, he can be very kind.

there's a lot of depth to him, and honestly, I think Blue Lock is pretty good at not doing anything to suggest oh hahaha homosexuality exists. isn't that funny

plus I think Bachira is canonically gay. we know he's canonically in love with Isagi.

kunigami and aiku are actually confirmed bisexual too.

Shidou and Sae were also highly suspect during u20, to the point where even homophobes cant deny they have something weird going on.

so to me... that's a lot of queer characters who are taken seriously and actually have characters outside of being a joke or a gag. they feel like real people. they have distinct personalities.

the bar is in hell, but it's more than most manga/anime manage.

so I have to give Kaneshiro credit. he's doing as much as he can, without overstepping the boundary I'm sure kodansha has set for him.

it's just a shame he's a sexist. also, I hope Kaneshiro grows a pair.

just have bachisagi get married in the last chapter you pussy.

let Shidou officiate!!!

[rei-ismyname]

Hi! I have a couple of questions for you regarding a topic that comics have neglected to the point of being ridiculous: romantic couples!

To start with, how do you write a romantic couple without making the usual mistakes?

Why is there a character, referring more to mutants, that no matter how hard the writers try, they can't give them a lasting relationship?

Who's your favorite romantic couple?

Which couple doesn't convince you, even if the writers insist?

Who among the mutants should not have any romantic ties until they resolve their issues?

Hello anon!

Interesting question/s. Romance! *Rubs hands.* I'm not sure if I'd agree that comics have neglected romance - or at least not only that - in fact pre-Marvel Timely (and even after) focused on romance comics for a long time. Patsy 'Hellcat' Walker might be the oldest Marvel character simply because she originated in the romance comic genre.

While Marvel expanded to horror, war etc and eventually pulp-turned superheroes, those romance roots were sunk deep. The romance formula is less about romance than romance comic tropes. You can see it through the 1963 run of X-Men where everyone, (including Chuck) pines for Jean. She in turn pines for Scott etc etc. I would argue that these roots blended with the general melodrama of cape comics and shifted into soap opera. However, Marvel identified their audience as white boys aged 6-11 (which I doubt was ever true) and, presuming their lack of interest, pushed it to the background.

Maybe that's semantics. I guess my point is that didn't really know how to write romance that wasn't sexist pulp, and they stopped trying to. Certain writers were more interested in romantic pairings than others, but it always comes back to drama through violence and selling books. Weddings sell books, sure, but so do breakups. Also, one writer will set up a couple and the next will ignore it or undo it.

That's fine, of course, but it does get in the way of long term couples. Even then, having to consider a relationship and give it page space takes time away from punching.

1. Honestly, I'm probably not the best person to answer this question. I have certainly studied and written a lot of creative works, but in terms of craft it's not really my department. It's a different proposition from genre to genre but I try to treat romantic relationships the same as any other - believable and relatable.

2. I kinda answered this in my opening paragraphs - the genre and serialisation doesn't really lend itself to romance. Characters status as IP gets in the way too, as Marvel especially tends to play it safe. They've been in business for decades without changing the status quo all that much, and certainly not permanently. There's exceptions to this, but there's just so many factors holding romantic pairings down - or keeping them together if the couple has become super popular. Take Betsy and Rachel, for instance. I love them together but writers don't seem to know what to do with them. Their books keep getting cancelled and it wouldn't surprise me if they were broken up. They get put in B or C tier books in a hostile environment with little margin for error, which makes it a self fulfilling prophecy.

3. Hmm. Favourite romantic couple. The loser husbands if I can pick them, but otherwise either Scott/Jean or Scott/Emma. Bei the Blood Moon and Cypher have a place in my heart too. Not sure about her place in the bioorganic transhumanist polycule Doug has with Warlock and Krakoa, but she certainly doesn't object. I like to think she slowly builds something with Warlock but doesn't really like Krakoa's smell or something. She puts in the work for Doug but now the point is moot bc The Island moved to another dimension of socialist bliss and Doug's a C3PO cosplayer now.

4. I'm sure there's plenty of others but Kitty and Colossus, of course. Terrible idea from the start and didn't improve. Not a big fan of Rogue and Gambit either. Their 'courtship' worked for me but I feel like they've become less than the sum of their parts. Maybe it's recency bias but they feel like 1.5 characters to me.

5 LOGAN. Also, pretty much everyone else. Definitely Logan though.

I'm aromantic and don't really think about this stuff a great deal. I don't ship; I more react to what's happening at present. These questions were difficult to answer so I hope they make sense.

❤️

[rimurutempest]

Hello.....If you don't mind me asking, can I ask, what are your top 7 favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series/etc) and your top 10 favorite (fictional) characters from any media? Why do you love them all? Sorry if you've answered this questions before......

Interesting specific.......

7 media huh?

SLC Punk - live action movie from the 90s about Punks in Salt Lake City during the 80s. As a trans person that grew up in Arizona in a region populated by a ton of Mormons I sorta related to it kinda and nowadays I feel like it's actually a really funny, really scary, and really beautiful movie that gets overlooked a lot.

The Shining by Stephen King (book) - it's not my favorite horror novel and it's not my favorite Stephen King novel, but it was the book that got me to enjoy horror. The story is so scary and good, the characters are fleshed out, and there's a whole underlying dialogue about abuse and alcoholism that's very scary. Which is part of why I don't like the movie, cuz the movie adaption (erases the usefulness of the titular "Shining") sorta erases the personal story about alcoholism and abuse. And, it's definitely there still, it focuses more of its efforts on just being a spooky haunted hotel, it's style over substance to me. The connection of the personal and horror made me sort of see the true story telling value of the genre, and now I'm like. In love with horror.

Inside Mari by Shuzo Oshimi (manga) - the best way to explain this is, what if Freaky Friday were more of a psychological horror. Reading Inside Mari has been a very important thing to me as an adult, I sorta see myself in it and there's so much trans emotions in this (there's a whole thing that Oshimi is probably trans), this work is so dear to me I refuse to read to watch other people's take or interpretations, which sounds bad but I just want my special thing that I interpret my way to be interpreted my own way. It's amazing and I love it. All of Oshimi's work has hit me in a personal place.

Wandering Son by Takako Shimura (manga) - one of the first portrayals of a trans person I saw in manga, and honestly still one of the best. There's a lot of criticisms we could give it, but I love it and I related to it so much. It was nice to see a story follow such a young trans girl (and boy) and see them grow. Probably part of why I decided to finally identify as trans.

Puella Magi Madoka Magica the Movie Part 3: Rebellion (anime movie) - this one is largely just emotional stuff that's coincidental. The original Madoka tv show (and thus first two movies) were great but I never thought it was perfect, but Rebellion emotionally murdered me and as everything else mentioned, it felt so relatable. Came out in a very important time frame for bonding when my husband, so I got to see it in theaters with him (twice technically, we went a second time with a friend) plus I got to see it with another friend (three times total) hehe. It's just like, a very big date for my husband and I, I remember it perfectly down to what I had for dinner (my first bowl of professional made ramen lmao). The movie just, really hit, and the circumstances around seeing it were just really important to me.

Lateralus by Tool (album) - I'm sure some people are gonna be like "whaaaa how edgy loser" or whatever about this. But Lateralus was an important album for me cuz it introduced me to larger intellectual concepts I'd never considered before, made me really fall in love with that brand of music, and was one of those things I would put on repeat when I felt very depressed (read: dysphoric). I know the members have sorta grown into shitty people (namely Maynard) but this album is just very important to me.

I'm just going to say The Green Knight (movie), there's a lot I want to put here, especially a lot about Arthurian literature, but I think the best way to just, placeholder all the Arthurian shit I'm obsessed with. The Green Knight is a fantastic adaptation that's incredibly beautiful and well acted. Love it.

tbh w/ you I don't wanna do characters rn so if you swing back by later I might.

[victorspindrop]

Music Artists I think the HOA Characters (Season 1 Specifically) would listen to!

Note: First head canon type thing I am putting on here (yay!). This is something I have thought a lot just myself in my lonesome so Id thought Id share it here! If you have any other ideas of what certain characters would listen to I would love to hear!

Nina

-> I think we as a fandom have collectively decided that Nina would 100% be a swiftie (and I agree). Her favorite album would be either Speak Now or Folklore, however, her fav song would probs be "London Boy" off of the Lover album though (for obvious reasons)

-> I can see her listening to some other softer artists like beabadobee, Clairo, and Boygenius (shes a softie at heart what can I say)

-> "All American Bitch" by Olivia Rodrigo is her confidence booster song for sure

-> Her and Amber have 2000-2010's pop music dance parties in their room together (which make annoy some of the housemates from them jumping around and dancing; also get in trouble with Victor about it but its worth it to them)

->Ok I need you guys to HEAR ME OUT with this one, but...Nina definitely is a little (just a little bit) of a theatre kid. I mean let's be real, she wrote an entire play for the school AND performed in it,,,my girl def is a little bit of a theatre girl. So with that being said, she listens to some show tunes from musicals (mostly Waitress and Mamma Mia)

Amber

-> She would so be a Y2k pop listening type of girl

-> Favorite songs would be "Rich Girl" by Gwen Stefani, "Just Dance" by Lady Gaga, HEAVY ON "Stars are Blind" by Paris Hilton!!!!!!

-> Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, Gwen Stefani, Beyonce, if its an iconic pop girl, she listens to them

-> Marina and the Diamonds. IDK IT JUST MAKES SO MUCH SENSE TO ME I CANNOT EXPLAIN. Some of her songs just give that "it girl" energy and if there is an "it girl" of the Anubis house its miss Amber Millington. "Bubblegum Bitch" is blasted in her car with the top down (because she def has a convertible and its pink)

-> Ariana Grande stan. Probably had a stroke when Ariana came out with a makeup line and bought ALL OF IT.

Fabian

-> Fabian def listens to alternative music old and new.

->LOVES THE SMITHS! Like its almost the only thing he listens to

-> Favorite songs by the Smiths include "There is a Light that Never Goes Out" and "Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want"

-> Listens to the Arctic Monkeys for sure

-> Some other artists he listens to are Radiohead, The Cranberries, The Red Hot Chili Peppers, and TV Girl.

-> Fabian is my favorite awkward loser boy... he listens to Weezer

Patricia

-> Didn't Alfie call her like a "Punk rock/goth vixen" or something like that? (I can't remember the quote or the episode it is in for the life of me)

-> Regardless of whatever the quote was, this is our punk rock alternative queen right here

-> PARAMORE SHE LIKES PARAMORE (has a crush on Hayley Williams because I said so)

-> Had a Panic At the Disco and FallOutBoy phase for sure

-> Listens to the Smiths a little bit (because Fabian showed her some songs)

-> Also listens to some metal rock, loves Poppy and always liked her weird concepts

Alfie

-> Alfie listens to anything and everything I feel like

-> alternative, pop, rock, jazz, electronic, DISCO, hell even fucking dubstep.

-> If he likes it, that's all that matters to him. He doesn't care about the genre or style of music it is

-> I feel he would listen to a lot of artists from the 70s and 80s (idk if that's because of Jeromes quote about him being stuck in the 80s but it would make sense!)

->Loves ABBA, BeesGees, Earth Wind and Fire, and WHAM

-> When "Lets Groove" by Earth Wind and Fire was trending on tiktok, he played it every chance he could. That song has been banned from the house since.

Jerome

-> Like Fabian, he's an Arctic Monkeys fan

-> ADVID LISTENER OF I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

-> Favorite song by IDKHBTFM is Choke

-> I feel like he would also love Childish Gambino idk why I just feels right

-> Secretly listens to Mitski. That boy has been traumatized even BEFORE he was at Anubis, he deserves to cry to Mitski

-> The Neighborhood is a favorite of his (especially their song Daddy Issues because of,,, obvious reasons) Second favorite song of theirs would be Single (if you haven't heard that song highly recommend)

-> Hozier feels right for him idk

Joy

-> I think as a fandom we have concluded that she is also a swiftie. Her favorite album is Midnights and Reputation imo

-> HEAVY ON OLIVIA RODRIGO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-> The Sour album was life changing for her (same can be said for Guts)

-> Literally her top songs of the year were all from the album. Jealously Jealousy, Favorite Crime, Hope You're Happy, Good for You to be specific

-> I can see her being a Harry fan

-> Definitely forced Patricia to go to Love on Tour (Patricia liked it, but she definitely won't tell you that)

-> She was a One Directioner so naturally, the love carried on into the members solo careers (had to miss class when Zayn left)

Mara

-> LAUFEY LAUFEY LAUFEY LAUFEY LAUFEY!!!!!!!

-> Also just listens to old Frank Sinatra, Doris Day, Dean Martin

-> Listened to 5SOS during her brief "bad girl" era to help prove her point but she actually ended up really liking them!

Mick

-> Ed Sheeran and Jojo Siwa

*AUTHOR NOTE* I really hope you guys enjoyed this! Tbh it took a while because a few were tricky for me. Please fell free let me know if you have any you would add. Sorry some descriptions are longer than others

[cowboybrunch]

writerly questionnaire tag!!!

finally getting around to this, thanks a million @the-golden-comet (here) @harmonic-melodii (here) and @fortunatetragedy (here) <3

About You

When did you start writing?

as soon as i could hold a pen. i have notebooks FULL of little me's stories (i keep everything ive ever written. for nostalgia.) it was mostly silly escapism for a lonely child but now it's sweet to look at and giggle. from when i was maybe eight? nine?: "Pain and fear, like a perfect recipe. Pain and fear, milk and eggs"

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

mmm probably. when i say ill read anything, i mean ill read ANYTHING. i dont think ill ever write a hockey romance but im down to clown

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared?

poetry-wise Bhanu Kapil has been a massive inspiration for me. also Kaveh Akbar and Ariana Reines (Mercury sits in a place of honor on my bookshelf). for novels? i feel like i emulate whatever i last read. Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver did horrible (affectionate) things to the way i write

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

my office! my favorite place in the world!! cozy lights (that double as gamer lights), diet coke can graveyard, comfy office chair big enough for me to sit in a way that absolutely destroys my posture. sticky notes everywhere (a fun challenge! can i read my own handwriting?) AND!! i have an audience

What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse?

reading something else, talking to someone about whatever im stuck on, setting a timer and just dumping everything in my brain (something in there HAS to be worth pursuing)

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

HA!

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

overbearing parental figures that believe they're acting in the best interest of their kid... surprising when i realized that it's in almost everything i write characters that are good at heart but commit atrocities due to their circumstances... less surprising oh! and death. i write a lot about death (someone pointed this out recently and i was like huh. you right)

Your Characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.)

Missy and Theodore staring at each other like

sorry! Theodore is my favorite!! he got here first!!!! he's my precious loser baby boy who HAPPENS to be the heir of death but he's trying his best! he's pathetic!! he's doomed!! but he means well! he doesn't want anyone to die alone! he wants to be good! he wants to be good soooo bad!! he hates rivers but loves the ocean!! he lies to everyone, including himself! he's simultaneously full of self-loathing and self-righteousness!! AND... he's bisexual!!

Which of your characters do you think you’d be friends with in real life?

i would kick it with Robbie for SURE. snarky little smarty pants that can't sit still for more than five minutes, we'd be peas

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

*looks around nervously* ... Marcella (BOO!! TOMATO!!) im sensitive and she would be mean to me!! i feel like we'd warm up to each other eventually but not before she made me cry

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

they just kinda... show up. and reveal more about themselves as i write them

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

ougffff. lots of anger in these parts. most of my characters are angry, esp the women. as they should be

How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc.)

depends on the character! for main guys, they get listed descriptions but i cant picture them in my head (thank you picrew). but others? they're like. blurry shadows moving through the story (do NOT ask me what Uriel looks like! i DONT KNOW!)

Your Writing

What’s your reason for writing?

words in brain make story in head. need story out of head so i can focus on literally anything else no but seriously. that quote that's like "the only thing worse than writing is not writing." it's like. a maintenance activity. if im feeling especially wound up it's probably because i havent written anything lately

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

if you leave me ANY comment i am kissy you on the forehead. just knowing that someone read it let alone enjoyed it... waoh

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

i am... trying very hard not to fall into self-deprecation here. i think there are things that i do well and things that i can improve on, but even if i write something and think it's "bad" i can still learn from it. all practice is good practice!!! (said through gritted teeth)

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

yea! i would find comfort in it i think, same way i do now. have my little characters for company

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it’s a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

i am my own target audience. i am the conductor of the self-indulgence train but there's room aplenty if you wanna hop on

tag! @illarian-rambling @writingrosesonneptune @sarandipitywrites @mrbexwrites @mysticstarlightduck and a wide open tag if you havent done this yet. gimme a peek into your brain!!!

[v1rtualv4mp]

hello! I was wondering if you had any headcannons for the bloodpack from blade ii? Specifcially snowman but honestly a lot of them didn't get their chance to shine imo before being killed which is too bad :(

⋆♱ 𝐁𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 ♱⋆

Genre: Romance/fluff

Disclaimer: Ever so slightly suggestive but it's just a little bit

A/N: AAA u have no idea how excited I was when I got your request!! It caught me so off-guard, I didn't think anyone would be interested in other characters other than Blade and Scud. And I totally agree with you bro, how can they introduce a bunch of cool characters and just kill them all off. I wish we got to see more of each ones personalities, especially Snowman! He was my favorite :( It wasn't sure if you wanted romantic headcanons or just general stuff, so I did a little bit of both! And also, I am so so sorry for the long wait, I'm new at this 😓 Goddamnit I feel so bad.

☆ PRIEST

– Had the prettiest, most healthy, defined and smooth curly hair as a child but then he fucked it all up with chemicals

– Owned a boat in his teenage years

– Talks in his sleep

– Definently a little addicted to crack

– Is the type of guy who claims to be a player but actually doesn't even know where the clit is

☆ CHUPA

– Used to be a mama's boy, I feel it in my guts I can't explain it

– And he was definitely a little spoiled, too

– Hear me out, he has such a mean face but I BET he's in reality such a loser, like, he has absolutely no game

– He gets really shy when flirted with, then he just pretends to be annoyed by scoffing and walking away (screaming on the inside)

– Is secretly into men but he's in STRONG denial

– Is super sensitive please don't friendly tease him, that guy will take it seriously and lose his shit

– Loves animals, especially big dog breeds and ducks

– Purple is his favorite color

☆ LIGHTHAMMER

– As much as he acts all tough on the outside he's a sweetheart once you break his shell

– Wants to express his love for his partners too but has a hard time doing it so, ends up feeling guilty

– Used to have an underbite

– Is the oldest one of the group, being 279

– Has one of the most nasty, juicy and aggressive coughs you'll ever hear

– Hates the singing of birds, it pisses him off for no reason

☆ VERLAINE

– As the movie shows, she's really really affectionate with her loved ones

– I'm guessing she already had a lot of romantic partners during her life but they were all short-lived, Lighthammer was the only one who lasted for a long time

– I'm assuming they didn't know each other before the whole Damaskinos's training thing, so yeah, they fell in love during it ♡

– Cannot leave her hair alone for shit, is always dyeing it and getting new haircuts

– Is part of the goth subculture (mall goth)

☆ SNOWMAN

– I think Snowman would probably be kinda aromantic

– Like, I think he chooses to focus more on important things such as training. In my opinion, he looks way more experienced than the rest of the Bloodpack so I'm guessing that he has trained for a really long time.

– Virgin

– Loves incense

– Eating sand was his main hobby as a kid

– Is a great cook

☆ REINHARDT

– Has difficulty forming actual bonds with people. As shown in the movie, he didn't even care that half of the people he knew for two whole years were all dead

– Maybe he's had only few friends during his lifetime, maybe 15 or 20 (not a lot since I'm assuming all members are 100+ years old)

– His mom forced him to go to church as a kid

– Second most old member (216)

– His favorite color is pink but no one can find this out

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Michael in the Mainstream: Top 100 Movies #50 - #26

Finally, we're in the top 50! These next movies are ones I have a little bit more to say about than the previous entries, though the real big fish to fry will be in the final stretch.

50. Cats

Bad movies like this don’t come around very often. Nearly every aspect of this movie is hilariously misguided to the point of insanity, with the special effects in particular turning what should be a campy romp into a bizarre fever dream. But this is precisely what draws me to the film! The flashes of greatness in the back half of the movie, particularly the genuinely great Skimbleshanks scene, really come together to create one of the most endearingly batshit experiences you could ever sit through.

49. Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

A movie that ruined an entire generation of women or something, this is a just a perfectly stylish action comedy with one of the most absurdly talented casts around. It's a fun, silly little live action comic book romp that manages to make great use of Michael Cera.

48. Eraserhead

Now this is the David Lynch we all know and love! This is one of the trippiest, weirdest movies ever made, and it has one of the greatest effects ever in the baby. I fucking love that baby. It is one of the most digustingly cute creatures ever conceived.

47. Hot Fuzz

Edgar Wright’s Shaun of the Dead is the far more popular of his genre parodies, but if I’m being totally honest Hot Fuzz is by far the superior film. It’s just funnier, fresher, and more exciting. It also has actual antagonists and some really great and memorable lines, plus it loves Point Break and, of all movies, Bad Boys II.

46. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl

Somehow, by some miracle, Disney managed to make a theme park ride featuring pirates (legendary box office poison) and make it into the most fun, exhilarating action adventure films of the 2000s. I think the bonkers premise combined with playful conviction from the entire cast is what really manages to sell this movie, but I must sadly give credit where credit is due: pre-dickhead era Johnny Depp, back when he was actually a good actor and not someone cast out of pity, brought the swaggering rock star pirate Jack Sparrow to life in glorious fashion, and manages to steal every scene he’s in. The only thing that could possibly make it better is if greatest character in the whole franchise Davy Jones was in this one, but they had to save something for the sequel.

45. It

While the miniseries starring Tim Curry as Pennywise has its charm, it is hampered by the restraints of television and its budget. With more money, we got a bigger, bloodier, gorier, and more impressive take on the iconic King novel, one that might be my favorite movie based on one of his works. The new, more horrifying and predatory take on Pennywise is certainly a big plus, but I think credit also has to be given to a young Sophia Lillis showcasing her acting chops early and Finn Wolfhard before he stopped giving a shit, as well as the rest of the kid cast. The Loser Club is the heart and soul of the story, and thankfully it’s the thing this movie nails… and it’s sadly where part two drops the ball a little bit. Grown ass adults in a secret club fighting an evil clown isn’t as cool as kids doing it, no matter how great it is to see James McAvoy and Bill Hader.

44. Kill Bill: Vol. 1

Speaking of movies where the sequel just couldn’t measure up…! This is one of Tarantino’s finest works, and certainly the one that most feels like the kind of movies that inspire him. There’s blood, ore, women going on a vengeful rampage… It really is a classic grindhouse movie with more polish. Uma Thurman truly kills it (along with scores of mooks) as Beatrix Ki—Er, I mean “The Bride.”

43. Predator

One of the manliest action films ever made, and also one of the greatest halfway plot switches of all time. You think you’re getting a simple macho 80s action film, and then halfway through, BAM! It’s a slasher movie and the macho men are the prey for a terrifying killer. Our final girl Arnold Schwarzenegger only wins by embracing those macho tropes and adapting them to a new foe. I think it’s a film where you can read it on the most surface level imaginable and deeply analyze it and still come to the exact same conclusion either way: This movie fucking rules.

42. The Batman

Live action Batman movies have been good, but too many of them miss core aspects of what makes Batman, well, Batman. Even the best ones like The Dark Knight, Batman Returns, or even Batman & Robin miss a few aspects and, while great films in their own right, just don’t feel like the definitive Batman. Then one half of the dudes behind Felicity took a crack at it and boy does he get it. This is what Batman should be. There’s detective work, there’s action, there’s car chases and gadgets, and most fascinatingly it’s an origin story but not in the way you think; rather than him becoming Batman, it’s him learning to become a symbol of hope instead of a symbol of fear. Robert Patinson proves he is one of the greatest talents of his age, and Paul Dano brings a deranged campiness to his Riddler that helps keep things comic booky even in a realm of grounded realness. And then there’s Colin Farrell’s Penguin, who is so good he got his own spin off show. It has never been a better time for Batman fans when it comes to cinema; we are eating good.

41. Guardians of the Galaxy

I was a bit skeptical at this film when I sat down to watch it. I mean, these were heroes I’d never heard of headlining a Marvel film when they seemed to be hitting their stride. Then the film opened with a crushing emotional moment, and then it goes into the opening credits as Chris Pratt dances like a goober to “Come and Get Your Love.” It all clicked for me, and it only got better from there as it morphed into the greatest “group of assholes become a found family” I ever saw at the time. I do think it’s the weakest of the trilogy now; Ronan is not a compelling villain and aside from that Redbone tune that opens the movie, the soundtrack kind of sucks (“Cherry Bomb?” Fucking seriously?). But when it comes to the Guardians, “weakest” is still “one of the best goddamn sci-fi action films you’ll ever watch.” It’s nice getting a reminder Chris Pratt is actually a good actor at any rate.

40. Raiders of the Lost Ark

I think even I can concede that The Last Crusade is objectively the best Indy film. I mean, it has Sean Connery in it, after all. But sometimes you just gotta let your nostalgia take the wheel, and when it does it tells me this one deserves the higher spot. No mattter what Sheldon Cooper says, this is one of the best and most thrilling pulp action movies ever made, and one of Spielberg’s finest blockbusters. If nothing else, it definitely has the best opening and arguably the best climax of the whole series. And maybe this is a hot take unless you’re Harrison Ford himself, but Indy > Han Solo.

39. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

It’s honestly amazing how this movie got me to give a shit about so many characters I wouldn’t ever have really thought about much otherwise. Miles Morales went from a cool footnote to one of my favorite Spider-Men, Gwen Stacy went from the dead love interest to a cool and alive love interest, Kingpin went from the best mob boss villain in comic books to the best mob boss villain in comic book movies… and that’s not even getting into how creatively this film uses the multiverse and the concept of variants. It’s really no big surprise just about every superhero movie in the coming years tried to crib its style.

38. The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

This movie is ass-numbingly long, especially if you’re watching the extended version (and I always do—weird bits that kind of rob suspense aside the death of Sauruman, the Mouth of Sauron, and Harvey Weinstein orc getting killed are too good to pass up) and it has about a dozen endings, but you can’t really say any of it is unearned considering what came before it. This is truly an amazing capstone to the most epic fantasy trilogy ever made, and not once in that monstrous runtime does it ever feel like any time is wasted.

37. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

This is the Western, and easily Clint Eastwood’s greatest performance ever. But despite how unflinchingly cool and badass he is, and despite how terrifying Lee Van Cleef is as the villain, it is Eli Wallach as the titular “ugly,” an all-too human lout, who manages to be the most fascinating character in the story. The final showdown is one of the greatest in all of cinema, and the Ennio Morricone score is iconic. If you only ever watch one Western in your life, make it this one.

36. The Prestige

Christopher Nolan may not know how to write women, but he sure knows how to take a batshit premise and deliver on it. This film about dueling magicians takes at least a half dozen turns, each crazier than the last, and makes rewatches oh so rewarding. Plus, David Bowie plays Tesla. That’s fucking rad.

35. Oldboy

When a film starts off with a man eating a live octopus onscreen, you know you’re in for something special. This might be one of the greatest “revenge really fucking sucks” stories ever made and one of the greatest downer endings of all time. The twist is genuinely a curveball of epic proportions, and the villain is one of the most heinous yet sympathetic you could ever hope to see. It’s a damn good movie that definitely should never be remade with Marvel actors.

34. Fight Club

I get you’re not supposed to talk about this one, but it’s hard not to considering how liking this movie can easily be misconstrued as being an endorsement of cult-like anarchism and chud ideologies. I like this movie because of its critiques of capitalism as well as its examination of the kind of guy Tyler Durden is, and also because this movie is super fucking gay. It also has Jared Leto getting his face caved in by Ed Norton. Literally every aspect of this movie is ridiculously appealing.

33. The Room

I fucking love bad movies, and this? This is the Citizen Kane of bad movies. Tommy Wiseau’s magnum opus is the sort of bad movie that comes along only once in a generation, something so spectacularly bad it must be seen to be believed. Hell, the reason I love Cats so much is it somehow manages to capture the absurd insanity of this film with a bigger budget, but this one is still better because rather than being an adaptation it is the singular vision of an egotistical blowhard who thought he was making great art. And you know what? He was right. This is the pinnacle of “so bad, it’s good.”

32. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

And you thought I was insane for preferring Glass Onion over Knives Out! Well, look here! I like the sequel so many “genius” animation critics derided as “incomplete” or “half a story.” I’m not the brightest guy on the planet, but even I understand the concept of cliffhangers and dark endings that set up future storylines; it’s like these people have never seen The Empire Strikes Back, which this is very much in the vein of. I think for me while the original film has a better and more focused story and a more interesting villain with Kingpin, the scope and the more impressive work done with the animation elevate this one above the first film in my mind.

31. Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves

A Guardians of the Galaxy clone based on a TTRPG that has famously had bad luck with adaptations and starring a cast of absurdly famous people you wouldn’t expect to give a damn about telling a compelling story in this setting… Truly, this was a disaster waiting to happen. But that’s just it: It didn’t happen. This is the best fantasy film we’ve gotten in ages, and a movie that is faithful to the concept of D&D. What I mean is that while it’s not literally adapting a specific storyline, it very much feels like the average campaign, to the point you can basically see where each character nat 20s and where they crit fail. You can see where the DM is like “fuck it” and has them conveniently solve a puzzle, and where they sat back and let the party fuck around. This movie gets D&D, and the entire cast is a blast to watch and they have great chemistry. We need more of these films, dammit!

30. Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

Speaking of movies it was easy to write off before seeing, here’s a sequel to a mediocre Shrek shrek spinoff made years after that franchise went dormant. But the movie is so fresh, funny, and vibrant it’s like that Shrek spirit was never gone. Puss is as fun as he’s always been, and the movie manages to tackle his insecurities and grappling with his own mortality with surprising grace for a family comedy film. It also has three of the most fantastic antagonists in Dreamworks history with the anti-villain Goldilocks, the relentless force of nature that is the Wolf, and the hilarious card-carrying villain Big Jack Horner. Truly, this franchise isn’t ogre yet.

29. Aladdin

For the longest time I called this my favorite Disney movie, and how could I not? Robin Williams and Gilbert Gottfried turn in some of the best and funniest performances of their careers here! The songs are absolutely fantastic! Aladdin is a great male lead and Jasmine is a really fun and compelling princess! It got a live action remake that’s actually decent and watchable! And, well, it’s obviously still pretty damn high up there. I’ve just come to realize there’s a couple Disney films I like a little better than this after all.

28. Seven Samurai

This is basically the birthplace of modern action movies, with tropes typical of the genre put on display for the first time and unbuilt at their conception. There’s a lot of commenatry on class and the nature of samurai, ridiculous feats of badassery, and one of the most poignant bittersweet endings imaginable. There’s a reason so many other films across the years have aped this one’s premise.

27. Terminator 2: Judgment Day

James Cameron’s magnum opus, and an action film that redefines cinematic action. It’s just a damn good film with stunning action, but I think there’s a few things that need to be addressed here. For one, as much as people love hyping up Sarah Connor as some feminist ideal or “one of the good ones” when it comes to female characters, she’s kind of a shitty person for most of the runtime, only regaining her humanity and her right to call herself John’s mother with the help of the T-800. And speaking of him, Schwarzenegger truly shows off his genuinely incredible acting chops, between his comedic attempts to emote and his delivery of the most tearjerking thumbs up in all of cinema. And then, finally, there’s Robert Patrick as the T-1000, easily one of the coolest and most intimidating villains in sci-fi, which is all the more impressive since he is scary and a believable menace when going up against a mountain of a man like Schwarzenegger.

26. Nope

In my opinion Jordan Peele has gone three for three with fantastic films, and this one is not only no exception, it’s my favorite he’s made so far. Such a wacky premise delivered in an impressive way, a truly breathtaking monster design, and two of the most unnerving scenes in recent horror history, Peele manages to cement his place as a modern master of his craft.

[blueindigo17]

WIP intro: Never Have We Ever

An introduction to my first WIP ever!!

Pinterest board -> Never Have We Ever

Spotify playlist -> Never Have We Ever

Summary: Liz has the best friends a girl could ask for. Harley, Mikey, and Natasha have been her people since elementary school, and Trevor and Amanda since middle school. Their whole lives, things have been pretty much the same. Same kids in their classes every year. Same streets between the same houses. Same, same, same.

At the end of her freshman year of high school, just about when Liz is wondering how much same she could possibly handle, she catches Trevor’s eye as he laughs at someone’s joke, and something deep inside her lights up. Something she doesn’t know what to do with. Something she can't push back down once it comes barreling up to the surface.

So much for same.

After that, things can’t stop changing. And not just in her own life—her friend group starts pulling apart at the seams. Harley begins withdrawing from everyone with no explanation. Mikey gets in bigger trouble with his dad than ever. Natasha only has a year before she has to move off to college. Amanda is stuck between the person she is and the person the world wants her to be. Trevor seems to have gotten off easy, but Liz can’t be around him for more than a minute without falling head over heels all over again.

In this collection of short stories, Liz has to wonder if the change of pace she thought she wanted is worth it. Sometimes it’s hard to be brave, and she’s never been the most open to change, but unfortunately, that does not stop it from happening. The only question is: what is she going to do about it?

Genres: short stories, realistic fiction, young adult, coming of age, contemporary

Themes: found family, first crushes, dealing with change, growing up, maintaining friendships

Character Introductions

(all photos found on Pinterest)

Elizabeth "Liz" Katelyn Stanton 🩵

"Emma met a boy with eyes like a man. Turns out her heart fits right in the palm of his hand." - When Emma Falls In Love, Taylor Swift

Nicknames: Liz, loser (from Harley)

Age: 15, turns 16

Gender: female

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: straight

Birthday: September 4th

Star sign: Virgo

Friends: Harley, Mikey, Natasha, Trevor, Amanda

Crush: Trevor

Family: Elle (mom), Kevin, (dad), Aiden (younger brother, 13)

Occupation: high school sophomore, summer camp counselor, works part time at Ivy Bookstore

Liz may appear reserved and quiet to the average person, but one could only dream of being lucky enough to witness her joy at describing her favorite constellations, or listening to her rave on and on about the book she just finished. She's only a sophomore, but she's already making plans for her future career in astronomy. She tends to get her head stuck in the clouds, but there's one person she always knows can bring her back down to earth... ❤️

Harley James Wilson 💚

“20 questions, you tell the truth. Been stressed out lately, yeah me too.” - It’s Nice To Have A Friend, Taylor Swift

Nicknames: loser (from Liz)

Age: 15, turns 16

Gender: male

Pronouns: he/him

Sexuality: aroace

Birthday: July 13th

Star sign: Cancer

Friends: Liz, Mikey, Natasha, Trevor, Amanda

Family: Jessica (mom)

Occupation: high school sophomore

As much as he tries, Harley can't help but wear his heart on his sleeve. He might not say it aloud as much as his friends do, but he would go to the absolute ends of the earth for them. The apartment is quiet most of the time--it's just him and his mom, after all--so he fills the room with music. "I don't know. Writing songs just... makes me feel lighter..."

Michael “Mikey” Andrew Miller 💛

“You wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking. If you knew where I was walking: to a house, not a home, all alone ‘cause nobody’s there.” - Dear Reader, Taylor Swift

Nicknames: Mikey

Age: 16, turns 17

Gender: male

Pronouns: he/him

Sexuality: irrelevant

Birthday: November 23rd

Star sign: Sagittarius

Friends: Liz, Harley, Natasha, Trevor, Amanda

Family: Jenny (mom), Neil (dad)

Occupation: high school junior

Mikey is wholly agreed as the funniest member of the group. He's got something clever to say in response to almost anything, and there are very few things he'd rather do than make his friends laugh. He's well aware of it too, because it's the easiest way to pretend that everything behind closed doors is just fine. It's nothing to worry about, really. He just has a... strained relationship with his dad. That's what he calls it. He's fine. It's fine...

Natasha Diana Knightley 💜

“I can’t let this go. I fight with you in my sleep. The wound won’t close. I keep on waiting for a sign.” - Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve, Taylor Swift

Nicknames: Tasha

Age: 17, turns 18

Gender: female

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: straight

Birthday: January 31st

Star sign: Aquarius

Friends: Liz, Harley, Mikey, Trevor, Amanda

Family: Isaac (dad), Nylah (younger sister, 7), Alana (younger sister, 6), Jonah (baby brother, 2), Kiera (mom)

Occupation: high school senior, summer camp counselor, part of a tutor group at the library

Natasha's got it all figured out. She studies hard and has the grades to show for it, she's mastered the art of getting her little siblings exactly where they need to go exactly on time, and somehow she is still able to spend time with her friends. Since her mom left the picture, a lot more responsibility has been put on her, but she's practically the poster child for taking things in stride. The one thing she hasn't figured out quite yet is how to do it all without stressing herself sick...

Trevor Steven Marshall ❤️

“Now he’ll be her shelter when it rains. Little does he know, his whole world’s about to change.” - When Emma Falls In Love, Taylor Swift

Age: 15, turns 16

Gender: male

Pronouns: he/him

Sexuality: straight

Birthday: August 13th

Star sign: Leo

Friends: Liz, Harley, Mikey, Natasha, Amanda

Crush: Liz

Family: Julia (mom), Adam (dad), Audrey (older sister, 18)

Occupation: high school sophomore, summer camp assistant

Trevor is particularly good at noticing things. It's probably what drew him to photography, and definitely why he's gotten so good at it, but the effect it has on his interactions with Liz are overwhelming. She could be simply existing in the same space as him, and he wouldn't even notice if the ground opened up underneath him. It's enamoring, but it's also pretty inconvenient given that, well, he's him. He couldn't possibly be her type, right...?

Amanda Felicity Renee Hamilton 🩷

"And they tell you that you're lucky, but you're so confused 'cause you don't feel pretty. You just feel used." - The Lucky One (Taylor's Version), Taylor Swift

Nicknames: Mandy

Age: 15, turns 16

Gender: female

Pronouns: she/her

Sexuality: bisexual

Birthday: February 14th

Star sign: Aquarius

Friends: Liz, Harley, Mikey, Natasha, Trevor

Family: Nancy (mom), John (dad), Erick (older brother, 20), Mackenzie (older sister, 20)

Occupation: high school sophomore, works part time at Ivy Bookstore

Amanda doesn't know how she became, for lack of a better term, popular, but she would very much like to get off this ride. They all want their own personal Regina George, but all Amanda can give them is a girl in glasses and a sundress with paint on her hands. None of her friends blame her for associating with those people, but that doesn't mean they aren't pissed when Amanda is consistently stolen from them...

[nyandaah]

I'm like, nearly caught up on the manga for ranger reject (I refuse to call it go go loser ranger)

I picked it up because the anime's first two episodes really impressed me. I love tokusatsu and meta deconstructions of genres that I love (with the caveat that the work also has love for the genre..)

and I hate to say it but I. do not love it as much as I want to.

the manga has really impressive art and intensely engaging ideas.. but the storytelling drags on, falling on the genre's storytelling structures so much that the sentai angle falls on the wayside for entire chunks of the story.

it's compelling if you're a fan of those dark sci-fi action manga and the novelty of the premise makes it stand out... but i'm filing it as series that has promised me more than what it had to offer.

oh and the 4th anime ep has severely dimmed my enthusiasm for the adaptation.

(spoiler)

the battle with anxiety scythe boy in the manga was one of the few dragged-out fight arcs that I actually enjoyed.

the manga visuals sold how intimidating of a threat that divine artifact ability was.. and the set-up/payoff of how our two protags got out of it felt perfectly earned.

for the story going forward, it was a pivotal arc to establish D and hibiki's character and the trajectory of their development..

and the anime basically yadda-yadda'd over so much of it!

for the sake of the episode runtime, they cut out some important stuff from their initial conversation that I felt was important for us to get to know D, and the switcharoo ploy happened so quickly that a) it felt like a jump that scythe boy would assume they switched and b) hibiki's self-amputation did NOT have the impact that it did.

we didn't even get my favorite moment from that scene:

tl;dr- it was a disappointing adaptation of something that I was already sorta disappointed by..

[lauren-no-why]

For the character thing either Cobb Avery orrrrr my favorite sadsack loser Buck Vernon

Ayyyy it's Buck Vernon time. Okay full confession I actually don't spend a lot of time thinking about him but I do have thoughts. He's just not where 90% of my brain is at all times because he's not a World Ender. Sucks to be you, Buck.

First impression: LOL FUCK BUCK VERNON. I think he comes across as incredibly unsympathetic in the albums. Way more creepy stalker ex who is utterly clueless as to why he was ditched and unable to comprehend why Lee wouldn't want him. Entitled shitty asshole who needs to let her go so she can live her best life but he can't because he's an entitled shitty asshole.

Impression now: All right so I'm not utterly lacking all sympathy for the guy. He's delusional in multiple senses of the word, but also he's struggling the entire time with a massive problem that nobody actually has precedent for or should understand how to navigate, which is that he receives visions of his past and future all in a jumble with the present, that it can be incredibly hard for him to distinguish whether he's currently in a real situation or not, and that his relationship with Lee is something of a constant anchor, the one thing he can hold onto and feel is tangibly real (it isn't, but, he has nothing else, man). I'm fascinated by what happens after, too - how does he come out of this honestly incredibly traumatic journey and manage to have a musical career?

Favorite moment: The immense amount of cringe at Buck bullshitting his way into the recording studio with a shitty student acoustic guitar only to find out that Lee isn't there after all and immediately making so many enemies is absolutely hilarious. 10/10 work Ben. Amazing.

Also, maybe not top favorite but very memorable, Ben and the rest of the band cosplaying as the Buck Vernon Band during the Wait by the River music video is so goddamn funny to me with how Buck comes across as like, utterly cluelessly campy like he's performing for a low budget variety show aimed at kids. I love it so much.

Idea for a story: After everything that happened, he winds up alone, injured, penniless in LA, probably with some kind of jail time - and so left with absolutely nobody that he knows here but unwilling to go back to Detroit for whatever reason, he just. Goes to find Moonbeam again. Like hey. Uh. Hi. Remember me?

I just want so much more of them interacting because that's the other funniest thing in the world.

Unpopular opinion: This barely qualifies because of how few opinions exist but the only thing I can think of is that I just. I can't ship him and Johnnie. Does not work in my head. I think they're hilarious and Buck is just going to have to deal with occasional hauntings from now on but Johnnie has so much else going on in his un-life. Buck snapped him out of lying there dead on the concrete and that's great, but like, he has so much trouble to make that doesn't involve this pathetic white boy.

Favorite relationship: Oh definitely Buck and Moonbeam, yeah. Not romantic at all, again, but the obsessed miserable guy with weird visions who followed her bullshit advice because he's so clingy vs actual psychic who is tired of his shit is just so funny. I want lots.

Favorite headcanon: headcanon-slash-speculation: Quentin King is Buck Vernon in disguise as he tried to get a career going in a way that would let him be in Lee's vicinity now and then. He has an over the top invented abrasive personality, wears a wig, writes sort of pop folk americana in a very very similar genre to Buck's music, and Ben Schneider's painting of Quentin looks a hell of a lot like Buck.

Just saying.

[flurrin]

Just in general (because I don't know your mom), here are all my personal top anime recommendations:

Princess Tutu (2002) is a meta exploration of fairy tales and storytellers through the lens of a magical girl whose true form isn't the ballet student she poses as by day--she's just a duck. The seemingly simple story gets incredibly deep and dark as a deconstruction of the themes often found in fairy tales, but never to the point of despair or dissatisfaction. The animation style hearkens back to Osamu Tezuka's shoujo work, the soundtrack is nearly all classical ballet pieces, it's genuinely a work of art, if you've never heard of it, give it a try today, it WILL surprise you.

As prev mentioned, Mushi-shi (2005, 2014) is an atmospheric, episodic, dreamy show that dips into many genres such as romance, horror, and slice-of-life under the lens of speculative biology. It makes up little creatures that cause every day experiences and legends and draws you into how these creatures fit into that world. Highly recommended and brutally underrated. I believe only the first season was ever dubbed into English, sadly, because season 2 is even more amazing.

Summer Wars (2009) is one of my favorite films, period: a boy gets asked by a classmate to attend a celebration for her enormous extended family and is tricked into playing her boyfriend during the trip...and then his account on a Google/Disney/Amazon monopolistic website's security is compromised, and dangerous hacks begin to upturn not just the internet, but the lives of the real people whose information is stored in those accounts! Now he's doing damage control while balancing the precariousness of complicated relations with a family that has so readily accepted him into its vast herd. It will make you laugh, it will make you cry, it will warm your heart.

Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood (2009) is another classic. The pacing suffers due to adaptive conflicts with the original series, but once you get used to the breakneck pace at the very beginning, it's a riveting, violent fantasy series about sin, consequence, and love for humanity. The disabled main character's flaws drive and revolve around a gripping plot chock with twists and conspiracies. It infamously does NOT pull its gut punches, but balances them out well with comedy, charm, and beautiful, bright animation.

Steins;Gate (2011) is, in my opinion, the sci-fi series about time-travel. Populated by a cast of unforgettable losers, the series flaunts summery, dream-like visuals and a haunting soundtrack. The lead accidentally invents a time machine and hilarious hijinks ensue...and then he is hounded by the not-so-hilarious consequences. What was once a sitcom becomes a deadly game of timeloop what-ifs as he struggles to undo the damage of his own meddling. Trigger warnings for domestic violence, murder, and suicide. (True for all of my recs, but especially this one: watch it dubbed, the acting, writing and localization is fantastic.) (Also, additional, important separate trigger warning for transphobia in the portrayal of a transgender lead character. It was certainly making an attempt to be progressive in its time, but falls prey to old ideas of gender essentialism. It can be read somewhat favorably but this is generous, bring your own salt.)

If slice of life is more what interests you in anime, Silver Spoon (2013) is a coming-of-age story about a boy who decides to go to an agricultural high school to relieve parental pressures, and slowly falls in love with the world of sustainable farming. By the same author as Fullmetal Alchemist, Silver Spoon knows just as well how to balance dramatic moments with uplifting comedy.

Keep Your Hands Off Eizouken! (2020) is one of the best anime of the past few years in my opinion, really explores the medium of anime itself and has actual "cute girls doing cute things" taken seriously as human beings (and more importantly, Weird Artists) without the shitty fanservice. The animation is INCREDIBLE, pouring time into the sequences that will really ignite your interest in how these shows are made. (If you enjoy Eizouken, I can also recommend Shirobako (2014), which is about how anime is produced company wide. It's nowhere near as much of a labor of love but still has many excellent messages about creating art and balancing work. It goes into project managing, animation itself, 3D work, voice work, and many other small but vital aspects and makes them a natural part of the conflicts. There are also very specially produced animation sequences in Shirobako that are a treat to experience and make the fake show the characters are creating come alive.)

Everyone is going to mention Delicious in Dungeon (2024) because it's currently airing and pertinent, but let me recommend it because it's a breath of fresh fucking air in the somewhat stale "anime fantasy" genre. It's a dramedy that takes its world and characters seriously but puts them in fun, absurd situations that challenge their characteristics. If you liked Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves, it's a must-watch. If you like fantasy ecosystems, it's a must-watch. If you like characters who are just extremely passionate about niche interests, it's a must-watch.

I keep anime at an arm's length most of the time because I've been supremely let down by the industry's...common pitfalls, which is one reason most of these recommendations are safe for work/PG at worst (sans Steins;Gate and Brotherhood). But these are highly curated and I second all the recommendations in OP's post as well (Satoshi Kon's work especially, his movies were very adult and played into many different genres and all are worth experiencing) except for Frieren and Tatami Galaxy just because I've never seen those.

Enjoy!

my mom asked me for anime recommendations as someone who has never really thought about the medium and im trying to conjure up some examples that wouldnt be fucking embarrassing.

here's what i got so far:

Spirited Away

My Neighbor Totoro

Kiki's Delivery Service

A Silent Voice

Tokyo Godfathers

Perfect Blue

Paprika

Ghost in the Shell

Cowboy Bebop

Frieren: Beyond Journey's End

Tatami Galaxy

any others?

[asphodelical]

The Great Anime Rewatch of 2024 - Part I

(that technically started in December 2023.)

Suzumiya Haruhi no Yuutsu

First watched: 2007, during the height of Haruhi’s popularity Rewatched: December 2023

Original rating: 7 New rating: 5

I have definitely rewatched Haruhi’s first season at least once before; I just don’t remember when. Like almost everyone else who watched anime at the time, I got swept in this show’s popularity. 

A lot about Haruhi hasn’t aged very well. The facial animation often looks off-model, and there are also better stories within this genre that have come after it. But beyond that, I think Haruhi’s premise just isn’t suited to a long form story. A small group of supernatural entities and one normal guy have to entertain a blissfully ignorant teenage god so she doesn’t get bored and destroy the world. This also means that the other four main characters have no goals outside of their shared one of entertaining Haruhi. It would be fine if Koizumi, Mikuru and Yuki actually had relationships and interesting dynamics with each other, but they don’t. It also limits the cast to Haruhi’s whims and there’s only so much that can be done. I can’t believe there are twelve light novels, and the story still isn’t finished. 

As for Haruhi herself…she is so much worse than I remember. Assault, blackmail, extortion…oh boy. (Also, why didn't the computer club boys just, you know, destroy the fucking disposable camera?) She really annoys me, but has fleeting moments where I’m actually interested in her—like the whole monologue of her going to a baseball game and realizing how small she is in the universe. But she doesn’t really have a clear goal/motivation except to have fun. And that’s too vague. I feel like the message is to learn how to have fun being a normal regular person, but I can’t be certain. 

Thanks to Crunchyroll’s bizarre and inaccurate ordering of the episodes, I only watched the story relevant ones from the first season. Which, in total, is seven out of fourteen. And that’s all I needed. Haruhi is definitely no longer my thing, and this will probably the last time I touch anything in the franchise. (Fuck Endless Eight.)

__________________________________

Chobits

First watched: I have no idea. 2007 maybe?  Rewatched: December 2023

Original rating: 6 New rating: 3

This was never one of my favorite CLAMP works. Even when I first experienced this story as a teenager, its sexual content made me very uncomfortable. Now that I’m an adult, Chobits is possibly the single most uncomfortable anime I’ve rewatched. 

The whole story felt like How to Raise Your Girlfriend & Other Wish Fulfillments. Chi is so sexualized, but has the mentality of a toddler. So watching this character who talks like a six year old buying her male owner porn magazines is really fucking uncomfortable. It is not romantic, and it is not charming. The relationship between Chi and Hideki is closer to a father and daughter than lovers. Meanwhile, Hideki is a loser who can’t pay his bills, can’t cook, and can’t take the initiative in maintaining his robot-child-bride. He learns how to take care of her from just about everyone else and it’s pathetic. 

As for the sci-fi aspect of Chobits, it’s also aged a little weirdly. Humanizing and falling in love with AI is nothing new, and has almost always been used for wish fulfillment purposes. But it does ask the question of whether falling in love with AI rather than another human is okay, and the consequences of the spurned human partner. What Chobits doesn’t have going for it is that all but one of the named Persocoms are female and have male owners. Hideki is constantly warned not to fall in love with Chi, of course. But why bother trying to form a romantic relationship with a biological woman when you have a perfect, obedient android girl instead? The relationship is declared ‘pure’ since Hideki loves Chi despite being a Persocom, and because Hideki and Chi can’t have sex. If that’s what Chobits thinks is purity, then it can shove it up its ass. 

I lasted ten episodes, and realized the next three were all filler. I can’t do this to myself anymore. I would talk more about how the show’s sense of humor consists of Hideki freaking out about everything and Chi getting into contrived and sexual situations, but I really don’t want to think about this anymore. I’m absolutely baffled that this story was authored by four women. Fuck Chobits. I hate Chobits.

__________________________________

ARIA the Animation

First watched: April 2013 Rewatched: December 2023

Original rating: 4 New rating: 4

After the annoying disaster of Chobits, why not give one of these “healing” anime I used to despise so much another chance? I wanted something with minimal yelling and no fanservice. There are very few of the relaxing slice of life/“healing” anime that actually work for me. 

The weird thing about Aria is the most interesting part of its worldbuilding is also the most pointless. Humans found a way to terraform Mars into an ocean planet? That’s cool, but completely unnecessary. You could change it so that Akari is living abroad in Venice and it wouldn’t affect the story much. As a writer, it sounds like the author didn’t want to do actual research on Venice and took the fantastical route instead. The other worldbuilding elements are few and far between, and don’t pique my interest much because of how unexplored they are. Again, all the sci-fi elements could easily be substituted for real world things and not much would change. 

Everyone in the main cast more or less wants the same thing, and it all revolves around work. But the girls don’t seem to want anything outside of work. When we see them outside of work, it’s still for work related purposes. They don’t have friends outside of work. I barely know anything about any of these characters: what they fear, what makes them tick, or what they like doing aside from working. I understand that the gist of Aria is the calm beauty of life, and appreciating/experiencing it. (Only Yesterday is really good at this.) But if I have to slog through twenty minutes of uneventful storytelling only for the characters to tell me the moral of the story in the last two minutes, then why bother? You can still be a slow, relaxing story and have some sort of personality. (Here’s to you, Sketchbook: Full Color’s.) 

In the end, I only lasted nine episodes. Some Aria reviews I’ve read say that this is a lovely show to watch after a long day of work. But why would I want to watch a show where the cast barely leave their jobs after working my own? Cheers to the people who enjoy this series, but I don’t understand what it excels at, even in the scope of slice of life anime. I genuinely cannot fathom how some people believe this to be a masterpiece.

__________________________________

Star Driver

First watched: December 2013 Rewatched: December 2023

Original rating: 7 New rating: 5

After the snoozefest of Aria, it’s time to bring some mind-numbing spectacle back into my life. What I remember of Star Driver boils down to it being referred to as “mecha Utena” and little else aside from its aesthetics. 

One of the things Star Driver got right is that the main characters aren’t trying to hide their special circumstances from each other. The mech fights aren’t a secret and they’re not afraid to talk about it and it’s treated casually. The same for the villains—they know who they are, or figure out each other’s identities. Good on the writers for these choices. But I really wasn’t feeling Star Driver this time around. I didn’t care about anyone or anything, and couldn’t even joy the inherent silliness of the show because of it. I’m supposed to care about the main trio. But when Sugata was so far removed from the other two and I barely know anything about him, why should I be worried that he fell into a coma that only lasted a single episode? 

Like Aria, I only lasted nine episodes. The spectacle is pretty, and I would actually love to cosplay Takuto, but there’s nothing for me here anymore. Which is sad, because I was really hoping I would still enjoy Star Driver. 

__________________________________

Welcome to the NHK!

First watched: September 2011 Rewatched: December 2023

Original rating: 8 New rating: N/A

Rewatching Welcome to the NHK! is extremely similar to rewatching The Tatami Galaxy. The basic premises are the same: a loser protagonist is trapped in a vicious cycle. However, I was much more invested in NHK, although it’s a very hard show to watch. It’s not entertaining in the usual sense. Everyone in the cast is massively flawed and are messy people. They make terrible choices, which makes it difficult to watch them dig their own graves. At the same time, I want them to do better. 

The few episodes with Satou’s former class rep stuck in the MLM scheme felt really unnecessary; this is reinforced by the fact she’s the only character not mentioned in the final episode. But the peak of NHK for me was the Off Meeting. Those episodes alone gave me more of an appreciation of life than anything in Aria. The beautiful irony of Satou near singlehandedly preventing a group of people from killing themselves, but then quickly regressing into his ways was incredibly well done. 

When I finished rewatching, I realized the only character I actually liked was Yamazaki. I also don’t know if I can rate NHK. It was much a mixed experience that’s both a painful reflection of the daily struggles of living, schadenfreude, and enormously frustrating. But I am glad I revisited it. 

[akamarulover]

Winter 2021 anime

It has been a while since I wrote one of these reviews! But this season was SO good I wanted to talk about these series. There was so much good stuff that I ended up dropping some shows I want to revisit later. So here’s all the anime I completed in the 2021 Winter season.

NEW SERIES

Sk8 the Infinity

My favorite anime of the season. One of my favorites in a while. The staff working on it is just stellar (Director: Free!, Banana Fish) (Scriptwriter: Code Geass) (OST: Initial D) and produced by Studio Bones (MP100, FMA) no less! I cannot stress enough how good the OST is.

It’s about Skateboarding! Specifically, secret underground, no rules brawls in the “S” arena. Reki (innovative, artistic, engineer, talented, cheerful, sweet, best boy supreme) is a skater through every cell in his body. He meets Langa (cute, Canadian, snowboarder, angel), who recently moved to Japan after losing his father. Reki quickly pulls Langa into his world of skating and the two face the trials and tribulations of the S arena, and the colorful cast that inhabit it. 

The energy of the show is captivating and funny and a bit nostalgic. The skating tricks (and fails) are cool, and funny, and ridiculous, and an absolute blast to watch. The characters are charming and well rounded, and the story resonated with me in a very personal, motivating way.  I can’t recommend this enough! 

Wonder Egg Priority

CONTENT WARNINGS (sexual assault, abuse, self harm, suicide. If you need to know about certain warnings please make sure to look them up before starting)

Don’t let the pretty colors and cute girls fool you! This is a psychological horror magical girl series! With a similar look and production quality to any Kyoani series. After the suicide of her best friend, Nagase receives the ability to traverse dreams in the hopes of saving her friend. In those dreams, she and the girls she helps must confront their greatest fears and traumas. The enemies she and other “egg” owners face are grounded in reality, but twisted into grotesque forms.

The series absolutely does not shy away from heavy topics. The girls themselves represent a variety of personal internal struggles as well. Including a trans girl and wlw. Very good but very heavy anime.

Horimiya

Horimiya is simply romance done well. The characters are charming and likeable and funny. The cast is colorful and well designed with good dynamics. The main couple is established very early on, so there’s not a lot of pre-relationship drama antics. Rather, Horimiya explores the growing relationship between Hori and Miyamura. There are plenty of side characters though, that do go through the pre-relationship fumbles and bumbling if that is your jam. The side characters are also great and often become the focus of an episode.

Kemono Jihen

Cryptid kids solving mysteries! The character designs are amazingly well done. The color palette of the series is a visual joy to look at. Their powers are really cool and interesting. And the personalities hold together the show well.

Cells at Work: Black

It’s Cells at Work, but edgy! All the same fun shenanigans and random facts and character designs of cells at work, except this time the body is actively dying nearly every episode! These cells have to save their host body from fun things like Carbon Monoxide poisoning, ulcers, and erectile dysfunction, oh my!

Mushoku Tensei: Jobless Reincarnation

I tend to be a bit wary of the highly oversaturated isekai genre by now. But this one actually caught my interest visually and with its characters. IMO it presents those tired tropes in a thoughtful way. It does explore a lot of the more unpleasant aspects of isekai genre (CONTENT WARNINGS). But the way it’s presented still feels organic and usually interesting. Also the main voice actor, Sugita Tomokazu, carries the show.

Rudeus was a very much worthless loser in his past life. So once he is reborn, literally as an infant, he decides to start from scratch and work hard at bettering himself. He still has much growing to do, however, and he does make bad decisions often. But he learns to be reliable when it counts, and hopefully will grow past his problematic shortcomings in time. 

Skate Leading Stars

Aka the other worse skating anime this season. It did have a strong opening episode, which is the main reason I kept with the series as long as I did. The main 3 characters have a strong and interesting dynamic. Their backstories are interesting and the drama and dynamics between them all was compelling. Unfortunately, the rest of the cast was not so much.

SEQUELS

Attack on Titan: The Final Season

A bit of a misnomer, since it’s not finishing quite yet with its split cour. I’ve been a fan of the series from the start, and I really enjoy where it has headed. Despite being in a new studio, I think they still adapted the story well, which is what matters most. I got used to the updated character designs pretty quickly too. Eren you’re one crazy bitch I love it. Can’t wait for the actual end.

Doctor Stone: Stone Wars

I liked season 2 even more than I did the first! Senku has really grown on me a lot as a character. Even more characters were introduced. Established characters grew their relationships and developed. The inventions were fun (and factual). I enjoyed this season a whole lot! I can’t wait for more.

Cells At Work

The original, also airing! The season ended up being pretty short, only 8 episodes, which was disappointing. I didn’t feel a lot of the same charm that season 1 had either. It was still good, and I would watch another season absolutely. But I was left wanting a bit more.

True Cooking Master Boy

Not much to say other than the same fun cooking buffoonery. If you enjoy food wars, or want to watch food wars but without the fanservice, this is it. 

CONTINUING SERIES (from last season)

The anime had a strong opening arc that I really enjoyed. However a lot of this season was kind of a dud for me. Everything up through where the demon Mahito was included, was great. Nothing special, just typical shounen with cool powers and a high budget anime. But I enjoyed it. 

Except, not really. I did not enjoy the school battles arc. I do not like any of the second years, or third years, or other schools. I only care about what the main 3, plus Gojo and Nanami and Sukuna were up to. I think the series is strongest when it is not at the school. The high school part of it really drags it down.

The mission they went on right after in the final episodes was fantastic. It really reminded me where the series shines. Which is in its demon investigations.

Black Clover

This is another hit or miss series. When it’s bad, I gotta skip episodes. I don’t care for filler and for a good handful of the cast. But when it does decide to step up, its great! The fights are engaging and visually stunning. The powers are interesting when they’re utilized well. The demon form in Asta is always such an interesting part of the story. The magic visuals overall are great.

Osomatsu San 3rd Season

Same show its always been. You should know by now if you like it or not. Some of my favorite gags and episodes ended up being in this season. 

Pokemon Journeys

I was falling a bit behind, but I did completely catch up recently because Gou has been snagging some pretty sweet catches. I love the Grookey he straight up stole from Team Rocket. And he got a hella sweet legendary. What a good kid! He’s so cute and I’m so proud of him! Also Ash just evolved his Sirfetch’d which is  one of my favss. I hope Leon comes back soon.

DROPPED

The Promised Neverland season 2

Once I heard from manga readers it totally derailed itself, I dropped out. I plan on picking up the manga. I didn’t want to be spoiled by a lackluster adaptation.

Otherside Picnic

I want to revisit this one. I kinda replaced it with Wonder Egg Priority, which was like a similar but better version of the story.

Yashahime

Not gonna lie, I totally forgot about it. Nothing major made me drop it. I just didn’t have enough interest to remember it lmao.

Re-Zero season 2

The haremy crap got too much for me. All the appeal of the first season is totally gone. The story wasn’t interesting and the new characters were bad.

That Time I got Reincarnated as a Slime season 2

I never actually picked up season 2 to begin with. I finished season 1 and it was good enough. But i wasn’t interested enough to continue the story.

And that wraps it up. Winter season was packed, and there was a lot of good stuff to watch. Spring will have a hard time measuring up, but I don’t expect it to. I dropped or skipped out on some series that in a less hype season, I probably would have watched. Not a bad problem to have haha.

[hanmabae]

WHEN YOU TEXT TENJIKU BOYS ,,I LOVE YOU, REMEMBER THAT” WHILE YOU WERE FIGHTING WITH ANOTHER GANG MEMBER…

―――――――――――――――

⤷ ♡ CHARACTERS :: Kokonoi, Kakucho x gn! gender (y/n)

⤷ ♡ GENRE :: ANGST, Drama, TW

⤷ ♡ WARNING :: Cursing, TW death, torture, blood moments with knife, it will be really depressing and sad one! I warned you!

⤷ ♡ A/N :: BRO KAKUCHO ONE IS LONG BUT THIS IS MY MOST FAVORITE WRITING T_T HOPE YOU GUYS WILL LIKE IT TOO!😭 hope u will enjoy it! Btw comment if you want me to add you in tag list! Pls make it flop cuz I put whole my soul in it! NEW PART WILL DEPRESSED ON ACTIVE ON THIS POST!

PART 1 — PART 2 ⤵︎

⚠️English isn’t my first language so if there will be any grammatical mistakes, sorry! >_< (But I don’t think it’ll be many so dw)

KAKUCHO ::

It’s been a while since you and kakucho knew each other. You and kakucho were the best couple in the world. You guys had a healthy relationship.

You were smiling while you were thinking about him and the time you guys had together. But it didn't last for too long cuz you felt that someone was staring at you. You looked around and saw one of your gang members, he was one of the leader of it. “Can you stop smiling while you thinking about your dumb boyfriend?” Raiden said with an annoying voice

He always liked you but he knew that you would reject him because of your relationship with Kakucho.

“Why are you always getting annoyed about everything what I do?” you rolled your eyes at him and took the phone to text Kakucho, after all, you had bad fillings for today’s fight.

“EXCUSE ME? Did you just roll your eyes at me??” he got angry. You were even impressed “you better roll eyes at your ugly boyfriend, who can't even defend you” the thing is he has never seen Kakucho and he didn't even know that he was Tanjiku’s one of the leader.

Before you could reply someone entered and it was the head of the gang, Ankoku AKA Koku or Ko. He was powerful and he was strong. I can't leave you guys without admitting that he had a crush on you.

“Guys we're going soon and make sure to be ready, I won’t wait” he looked at you and winked, you just laughed cuz he looked dumb.

After long driving, you arrived at the place where you guys have to start fight. Somehow your opponents looked big and strong, but it doesn't scare you at all, you know that you guys are stronger.

Despite the fact that you and KaKucho didn’t have secrets from each other, you actually haven't let him know that you were in another gang. You were scared that he going to pissed because, oh lord he would become a monster. After all, we know he is the most protective boyfriend on the earth.

You guys faced your competitors but they seem to be scary, you never felt this scared before.

Before everything started Raiden looked at you with a worried face, he knew that you did not expect them to be like this. Koku also knew that you got scared of them and made you stand behind him. Now he regrets that he bring you here.

“Well, well, well, who do we have here?” one of them asked. “Fools”, “dickheads”, “idiots”, “sluts”, they started screaming words and without noticing one of them get closer to you and touched your face “What this beautiful girl lost her?” he was quite shocked “You guys are such losers that you bring a girl?” you couldn't look at him, because he was massive and scary.

Before you could say or do something, you felt a hand on your wrist. You definitely knew it was Koku. He pushed you away and hugged you closer to him.

“Don't you dare to touch her” he said angrily getting closer to him “today you will fight with me” he smirked.

“Oh, so she is your hoe?” he laughed “it's getting interesting!” he smirked and looked at you. “Sadly but I want her and only her” he turned in your direction “I want to hear her scream while I torture her and I want her to beg me to stop, cry and scream my name” he laughed. You already knew that he was a psychopath and you knew that you can't leave this place anymore.

Koku got pissed about things he said about you. He tried to get close to him, so he could hit him but you stopped him.

You inhaled and get closer to him, you tried to show him that you're not scared of him, ask yourself how will you did that? You were just thinking about Kakucha and how he would be angry if you die there or got scared without defending yourself. You even smiled while you were walking to him.

This guy got interested in you because you don’t look scared after his words. This even turned him on. He also smirked and started moving in your direction.

You looked at his face and then you looked straight into his eyes. you thought that you already saw this person somewhere, but don’t remember when or where.

He put his hand on your cheek and smiled but this smile wasn't psychopathic or scary, somehow it was calm and lovely, which made you shocked and more scared.

“Do it, if you can” you smiled and touched the hand that he had on your cheek and held it. After you knew one thing, you were kicking his balls and the battle started.

Before you finished he was already standing and smiling. “I like you so much! Do you have a boyfriend?” he looked at me and smirked. It was strange because a minute later he wanted to torture you and now he’s asking you if you have a boyfriend. You knew that this guy was a psychopath.

“Sadly for you but yes I have” you kicked him but he dodged “and who is he? Is he koku or that guy who was looking at you with obsessed eyes? Tell me and I'll kill them all and after I'll make you mine” he laughed and started searching for something “aha funny but no they aren't, now can we start fighting?” you looked at him tried to hit him.

“SURE THING” he yelled and knocked you down.

When you woke up felt pain. But this pain was everywhere on your body. After you opened your eyes and saw him.

“Good you woke up” you looked around, fight still was going. After you looked at your body with tears in your eyes because, it was all in blood and it was scratched with a knife.

Then he started to scratch your face with a knife and you started screaming. It was painful, you have never been tortured or scratched with a knife like this by someone. After he got deeper and deeper.

"How do you feel about it?" He smiled “You hurt me like this when first time you rejected me!" He screamed at me. "Do you realize how much I adored you?" "How much I wanted to be your boyfriend, but you rejected me and mocked me" after he stabbed you in the hand, you screamed and began crying "please, PLEASE stop it! This is not funny!" You yelled as you choked on your tears and watched your hand bleed.

"Do you think I'll stop? NO, you deserve more than this," he said after stabbing you in the leg several times. You couldn't stop crying and screaming for him to stop this. "Oh, you want me to stop now?" He stabbed your left leg without a second thought. "AH!" you exclaimed, "WHY?! Why are you doing this!? I don't even know who you are!" He became enraged and punched you when you said those words.

"So now you're pretending you don't know who I am?! Do you want me to remind you middle school? Do you remember boy named Kurayami? Who had feelings for you?" When you looked at him, you realized who he was.

You remembered who he was while you were crying. He confessed to you in middle school, but you rejected him. He came from a poor family and had only one mother who worked a lot; additionally, you knew his mother very well. She was a lovely and perfect woman who worked tirelessly to provide for her child. You reject him not because of it, and obviously, you weren't that kind of person; you just loved Kakucho, and that was the reason.

"So now you remember me!" You looked at him with sad eyes, thinking, 'he changed a lot,' and you didn't know why or what changed him like this. "Why are you looking at me with this eye?" he grew angrier and shaped you.

"What happened to you?" Why did you change so drastically? "I remember Kuruyama, who would never torture a person," you said weakly, trying to calm down and forget the pain. "Wait, what did you just say?"

"Who the fuck are you to say such things?" slap "how would you know about it when you were the one who made me like this?" slap "because I know who you are!" you yelled at him before anything he slapped you without even looking at you "shameless slut" slap “shut” slap “your” slap “dirty” slap “mouth” “OR ILL KILL YOU” slap.

“THAN KILL ME! Don't YOU WANT IT?” you screamed. He became angrier and stabbed you in the leg again, saying, "Oh no, baby, you deserved a painful and long death," as he licked the your blood from the knife. "Why did you do this to me?" He looked at you with sadly eyes "Why do you reject me?" he inquired. He began scratching your legs with a new, sharp knife.

You heard someone call your name, and when you glanced up, it was Ankoku, who was taken aback by the way you looked. "WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" He yelled, but one of the members pushed him down and said, "Shut it and leave them, she's already dead, can't you see?"

You knew he was right, and you wanted it. "Please put an end to it," you mumbled.

"Well, before you answer the damn question I asked," he paused, "why did you do this to me?" He looked at me with sad eyes and touched my bleeding face, saying, "This will not happen if you just accepted me and we could get married and have kids after school." He smiled and wiped your tears away.

"I didn't love you and I still don't love you," you admitted after he slapped you.

"Do you realize how much my mother loved you?" He has sad tone "I'm sorry but I don't love you and I'll never love you because I already have a person that I've loved my entire life," you inhaled. He lowered his head and looked at you, "was it an orphanage guy?"

"DO NOT ADDRESS HIM LIKE THIS!" You yelled. "I'm sure your mother would be upset if she knew what you're up to right now!" And he stabbed you in the stomach with the words, "Shut the fuck up and die!" He stabbed you once again. "SHE DIED BECAUSE OF YOU," he stabbed you. “You have no right to say things like this," he became angrier and began stabbing you with his knife.

You've just felt cold chills run through your body. You couldn't feel pain anymore, and all you could think was, 'I can't believe I'm going to die like this, this isn't the life I wanted or such a painful death.' All I wanted was to be by Kakucho's side! Am I asking too much?' Before everything came to an end, you opened your eyes and saw Kakucho standing in front of you.

"Kaku?" you questioned. "I'm glad you called me that! "I'm hoping we'll become good friends," he said shyly. You remembered it as if it were yesterday. It was your first day at the orphanage and the day you fall in love with Kakucho.

The next thing you noticed was an adult Kaku. You started crying.

"Would you please take good care of me?" He asked and I agreed "Can't believe you accept my feelings and the fact that you're my girlfriend," he said as he hugged you. This happened in middle school at our school.

And again you awoke in your bed, feeling as if everything had been a dream. Then Kaku opened the door.

"Good morning, sunshine!" He embraced you. "Can you promise me one thing?" He asked with a big smile "Will you always be by my side?" you agreed, trying not to cry. "yes I'll," but after you agreed, everything went messed up and everything went black, except for kakucho, who was standing in the darkness with open hands waiting for you to hug him.

You ran up to him and hugged him, but you were soaked. You looked down and saw blood all over your body; you knew it was yours and that you were bleeding.

When you looked up, you saw an adult kakucho who was unhappy and disappointed. "How come you lied to me?" He started crying suddenly, but with bloody tears, after you realized you had a knife in your hand and were stabbing him.

He was still was crying with bloody tears and asked, "Why did you kill me?" You looked down at your hands, which were covered in blood, but there was no knife anymore.

Without knowing Kakucho stabbed you and said while looking at you with his bloody tears and face “it’s your time to go” you looked at him with scared eyes.

You tried to say something to him but it felt like someone took your voice away.

He looked at you with sad eyes and said “I love you sweetheart and I'll miss you!” he kissed your forehead. “Goodbye” he looked at you one more time, with fake warm smile “Sweet dreams my love” and next everything went black.

Kakucho was sitting and conversing with Shion. When Izana slammed the door and announced, "We're leaving,"

His reaction astounded them. "Izana, what happened?" Koko questioned. Izana took his belongings and left without saying anything.

Boys exchanged curious glances and left. "Can you explain what's going on, Izana?" Kakucho summoned him. With angry eyes, he turned around. "One of my friends called and asked me to help him with something," he said, looking at Kakucho. "But what help does he need from us?" Sanzu questioned.

"He's also a gang leader, and he's had fights with other gang members, but they were stronger than them, so they need help," he smiled.

"How come Izana is helping someone?" Shino asked. "Oh, shut it, be happy, we're going to fight them." Sanzu burst out laughing.

They arrived but no one was there only members of Izana’s friend.

When Kakucho found a body, he began to look around. It was all covered in blood and beaten up. He could see that the body had been stabbed all over and that there was no place on it that hadn't been scratched or stabbed.

He looked around, but no one compared to her, and she was the only female in this place. He knelt and touched her. He becomes numb.

He realized it was his beloved girlfriend. He couldn't believe someone had done this to her. He began crying without realizing it

“NO! NO! Please tell me that isn't you! "IT CAN'T BE TRUE!" he cried. " he screamed through his tears. Boys noticed him and went to check him. They were shocked. Izana took a look at your body. He couldn't say anything or even comfort his old best friend. He was sobbing while he was looking at his best friend lying on the ground.

Kakucho hugged you while he was crying. "WHO DID IT TO YOU?" " "How come?" You do not deserve to die like this! " He sobbed even harder, "you don't deserve to be tortured like this," he couldn't believe you were dead. “You promised me that you would stay with me forever”.

He was hugging you for a long time and then he put you down and kissed your forehead “goodnight princess, I love you too and remember that” he looked at you once again “I'll find the person who did this to you and I'll torture him like he did that to you” he standup.

Izana was still shocked when Raiden and Ankaku showed up.

"So you're her boyfriend," Ankaku said, looking at you two. His and Raiden's eyes were both red.

Kakucho got angry he wanted to punch them but Izana and Shion stopped him.

"Calm down, we haven't harmed her," Raiden said. "After all, we loved her as well."

"Kaku, calm down, it's Ankaku, the gang's leader, and Raiden, the second leader," Izana told Kakucho. "They would never do this to their gang members," Shion added.

“Who did this to her” Kaku said with anger. "His name is Kurayami, and he is the leader of the Yakuza gang," Raiden explained.

“yakuza, also called bōryokudan or gokudō, Japanese gangsters which are members of what is formally and it's called bōryokudan translated as “violence groups”, or Mafia-like criminal organizations. That's why we called you, they killed our member and your girlfriend, we need your help to destroy them” Ankaku said with looking at Izana.

“We are in,” Izana said without thinking. “I will kill them all” Kakucho added with angry eyes.

That's how Kakucho tortured the leader of this gang and got on the top of the Yakuza.

(Ps I would love to continue but it will be off the topic so( ＿ ＿)ノ｜)

KOKONOI ::

You're going to fight with another gang today without telling Koko. He had no idea you were another gang leader, and you hoped he never found out.

You and Koko we're dating for two years now. And you were not only the most intelligent couple, but you were also the most clever in financial matters.

Today you will face off against the most repulsive gang, Moebius. They will still have more people than you, but you already knew you would win.

One of your members called you. "Blackhead, it's time," he said, and one of the guy who was sitting next to you remarked, "Can't wait to fight with these assholes."

Then you guys arrived. You have noticed that Moebius had a large number of teammates. Then you stood up beside to leader you saw a girl, who was glaring at you.

'This girl is creepy as hell,' you smirked. The leaders then began to argue, and the battle started.

You were fighting against a man who was physically weaker than you. You knocked him down, and the next thing you knew, this girl was standing in front of you.

"Well, hello," you said, smiling. She began fighting and slamming hands, but she was extremely weak.

"Can you fight normally, without acting like a chicken?" and you hit her in the face. She tripped and her nose started bleeding.

“YOU! "I'm going to kill you!" she yelled and got up. "You stole my man, and now you're hitting me?" "How dare you hit me, slut?" She screamed.

"Who's your man?" "Who are you?" you asked, smiling. you were somehow interested in her.

"Well, killing you will be easier than killing Akane," she smirked.

'Wait, did she just say the name of Inupi's sister?' It's not possible.' you were looking shocked. "Who the fuck are you to say things like that about Akane?"

"Oh darling, I'll get rid of you just like I got rid of Akane!" she laughed. "Can you fucking explain what you mean when you say 'I get rid of her'?" "I bet you messed up," you laughed. "Akane died in a fire, and only her brother survived," you claimed.

"Could you tell me how this fire started?" you looked at her and said "No one knows," she smirked, "but they said it was because of the candle."

“Oh come one don't tell me you believe in this shit” she laughed putting her left hand on her mouth and looked at you like you were trash.

( N/A- hope you know what moment I'm describing bahaha like in the manhwa’s villain woman with red eyes making fun of FL and she throw her on the ground and background went black and her eyes get darker or lighter and she put her left hand on lips while she making fun of her- idk I'm bad at explaining moments sorry-)

"And how did you find out—how her house caught fire?" You showed an interest. "Or what made you want to get rid of her?"

"Let me explain in simple terms, she was madly in love with Kakucho, and Kakucho was madly in love with her, but she deserved to die because I and Kaku are made for each other," she crossed her hands and hugged it. "After I went and burned her house, well, not her house, but her room," she said with devilish eyes, "her screaming sounds were music to my ears."

'It can't be true- how can it be- so she died not because of the candle- she died because she burned her room' With your hand on your mouth and a stunned expression, you couldn't do anything.

"Aww, he's so cute!" While you were thinking, she laughed and smacked you with her armored handle. She pulled out the knife and laughed, saying, "I was writing for two fucking years."

'Ugh, she's a psycho!' 'My head hurts so much.' You looked up and saw the knife in her hand, thinking to yourself, 'are you kidding me?' You were unable to move or do anything.

Before you could stand up, she stabbed you in the stomach, she went deeper and deeper. She was twisting the knife inside of you. You screamed and sobbed. The pain you've never felt and the pain you've never wanted to feel on you.

“Say hi to Akane!” she smiled and removed the knife away.

You collapsed to the ground, unable to breathe normally due to the pain. You tripped and fell down. Tears streamed down your cheek.

'I can't die like this,' she says. you thought ‘at last I texted Koko’ With a smile on your face, you began to cry, 'I miss him so much, please Koko, don't die as soon as I did!' Please, however, live your life for both of us’.

You remember how you met, and it was four years ago, when he was in pain due to the death of his crush. You both were good at math after he fell in love with you and you started dating, and you both loved money more than anyone else. You laughed as you remembered how you and Koko used to compete over who would get the most money and other things like this.

He's a sweet person, and you'd like to spend more time with him, but it seems that you haven't left enough time. You started crying and laughing at the same time. 'Thank you for everything, Koko; I love you; please don't forget about it and me.' And you left this world with both sad and happy memories.

Kokonoi was playing cards and UNO with the Haitani brothers while they were watching the battle of other gangs, after Izana and Kakucho arrived.

"I'm getting irritated," Sanzu admitted, and Shion agreed. "You're always irritated," Koko said as he looked at Izana.

“"Same, let's have another fight where Moebius gets ripped off," Izana said as he sat like a king/queen of Japan. "Bro, you knew about Moebius' fight and didn't tell me?" Sanzu shrieked.

"A friend just told me," Kakucho explained.

"All right, let's go." Koko agreed and they left. When they arrived, there was no one but people who had been beaten up.

"Oh man, it's nothing," Sanzu exclaimed, "so pathetic," Ran and Rindou responded.

They started looking over when Koko noticed the body of a female. He became intrigued and checked it out. He was taken aback when he looked down. It was you.

Koko didn't believe it when he touched your cheek, which was still wet from tears but white.

'There's no way it's true.' "Come on, wake up, stop joking," he thought, but you did nothing. "LET'S GO!" He shaked you and he started crying.

Boys heard Koko's scream and approached him, saying, "Can you not scr-" Sanzu was unable to finish his sentence because he was interrupted by Izana and after they all saw your body. They got shocked, how come you were lying there.

“Koko I'm sorry for your loss” kakucho said with a sad voice.

"Come on, you can't leave me like this," he screamed, "you said you'd never leave me," he hugged you.

He was crying like a baby because he realized he didn't say I love you back even though you texted him, he knew you saw the message he sent, he was in anger, he could just send you I love you too and now he can't even say it back. ‘Now you will never know that he loves you too’ he whispered thought about everything that he did for you.

"I'M SORRY." "I WAS A BAD BOYFRIEND WHO WAS SELFISH!" he yelled, "please, oh God, I love you too!" Just a open your eyes!" He sobbed. Boys never seen him crying like this.

After some time, he looked at you and kissed you on the cold forehead. "I'll find out who did this to you and kill them all," he said. "Sanzu, I think you'd like to be my partner in torturing people," he said, looking at Sanzu, who was surprised by his change. "Yes, I would love to," he smiled, Sanzu knew you very well, after all, you guys were good friends.

That's how Sanzu and Koko hunt down and torture the girl who stabbed you. The girl told them that she killed both of the girls because of him. And then Koko became extremely angry and tortured her with joy he had never known, even Sanzu became terrified of him.

(ps how much I want to explain everything in detail but I can't >_< )

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[tigermousse]

Under Maintenance

genres: otome, romance, comedy, slice-of-life

A visual novel about people, who are lost in love and life and can't find their course in the routine. MC is stuck in a small town on a temporary uninspiring job, the only thing that brings joy to her life is the otome gacha game Heavenly Love. So when one day she comes home to discover that the server of her favorite game is under maintenance, she decides to do something else for a change and starts looking for love in unusual places.

In the beginning MC is not looking for a serious relationship, mostly for a fling - or even a one night stand. But maybe if she decide to deepen the relationship with one of the boys, she will also discover what does she wants for herself in this life?

I like that the game is starting with casual sex in some routes, with a possibility to develop romance later. Definitely not your usual setting in otome VNs.

CHARACTERS:

MC

Name: changeable

Age:30

Occupation: temporary retail sails manager

Hobbies: otome video games, photography

MC is likable however somewhat air-headed. She is funny, flirty, easy-going, sexually active. She's pretty much lost in life and forgot what brought her real happiness. I like how unprejudiced she is about other characters.

She is into photography, but didn't practiced for a long time, because in her routine she gave up pursuing something that interested her earlier.

Of course, MC is relatable, because aren't we all playing this game exactly because we like reading otome visual novels?

My rating 5/5

Love interests (MILD SPOILERS AHEAD):

You can meet them through the dating app and check their profiles from home - or going to the local pub. As a result, the story slightly differs in the beginning. In my opinion, going to bar and trying to pick a guy by ordering his favorite drink is more fun.

Theo

I like how this route starts as something totally unexpected. If you meet Theo with an app, his profile says that he is looking for something without strings attached, however after meeting him in person, he appears one of the most serious characters ever.

Very old-fashioned also. Absolutely not the traits you are expecting from a muscular guy, covered in tattoos. He is very dedicated to his family. Though I find his route kinda bittersweet, because he had to give up his previous life in spite of the circumstances. I can understand it, but it doesn't make it easier for him. He's responsible and caring. And probably the only character which isn't lost in life, mostly because his family is his anchor. But at the same time Theo is probably the only character which doesn't change much during his route. With his busy schedule I'm surprised he can find time for dates.

My rating: 4,5/5

Tristan

A jack of all trades master of none, Tristan has so many hobbies. First we meet him in a bar, where he tries himself in a stand up comedy.

Tristan in fact seems like a nerd and somewhat of a loser without proper job and education, But I can understand why MC is interested in him. He is smart, funny, enthusiastic about everything. His honest interest with everything around him and the will to explore is contagious, I really love people like him (and nerds also).

And in the end it seems like pushing Tristan slightly towards further development, MC is moving forward too.

My rating 4,5/5

Luca

Luca is a kind of guy that draws attention of all local girls, and I don't like to be in competition. I'm afraid that in reality their one-night stand will end the next day. His story wasn't the most interesting too for me.

My rating 3/5

Mark

I have to say, that I'm surprised that MC is ever deciding to give Mark a chance. I see that at first Mark wasn't a dateable character, and it makes sense. Who in their right mind would develop a crush on a rude local drunk, who is talking nonsense and behaving like he's still in a high school?

No, seriously, especially after you played other routes, when Mark behaves like a complete douche. Also he seems pissed off by basically everyone in the game.

I could at least understand if he was looking like an eye-candy like Theo or Luca, or maybe dressed to nines, or had a lot of cash…but he looks ordinary, constantly drunk and also wears a jacket which is at least 13 years old.

Mark is the one of those dudes on dating apps who is proposing sex to you in their second message after hello, and if you decline, they're starting to insult you immediately.

Of course, in his past was something that destroyed his motivation and will to move on, but you can't justify your shitty behavior with something that happened 10 years ago.

On the bright side, I like how Mark is really growing as a character. Their relationship seems a bit rushed, because the novel is not very long. But still it is a nice touch that Mark is trying to understand and get into things that interest MC.

My rating: 1/5 in the beginning of route -> 3,5/5 in the end of route

Overall:

Visual: 5/5

Story: 4/5

Characters: 4/5

Romance: 3,5/5

Originality: 3/5

My Rating: 4/5

The game is free. You can get if from itch.io or steam