#Logan is an animal and he'd fuck Wade like one

[justbr0s]

Logan putting Wade on his hands and knees, nudging his legs apart, making room for himself between Wade's thighs.

Logan pressing Wade's head down, making him arch his back, muffling that babbling mouth.

Logan driving into Wade from behind, leaning on top of him, heavy, leaving no room for Wade to even squirm.

Logan biting into Wade's shoulder hard, keeping him in place, rutting into him like the animal that he is.

Wade moaning loud, unable to help himself, so loud their neighbours can hear everything.

Wade chanting 'Logan' - not Peanut, not Wolvie - as he gets close.

"Logan.."

[twilightkitkat]

What if Wade died and Logan went batshit insane? I'm talking teeth gnashing, claws out, full-on feral murderous rampage. Mind blank with nothing but fear and adrenaline and unbridled fury.

Logan went through all that suffering, all that pain and loneliness and grief just to finally find a home. Only to have it ripped away from him in a moment.

He already went on a killing spree when the X-men died. He was full of anger and regret over their death, over how he never let himself get too close.

If he was that upset over the deaths of his makeshift family who he never truly opened up to, imagine how horribly he'd react to losing Wade. The only person he let himself be emotionally vulnerable around. The first person who actually understood him and wanted. The only person he thought he'd never lose. Someone he was prepared to spend centuries with, who his entire life and future and home was built on.

He'd snap. He rampaged and killed the culprits and civilians alike when the X-men died, before settling into a miserable, drunken state waiting to die.

He couldn't deal with another loss like that. He'd break.

And so he did. This time, it didn't just stop with civilians who got in his way. It was like his mind refused to accept Wade's death, tearing apart anyone in sight while looking around like a wild animal. Eyes somehow razor sharp and unfocused all at once.

He destroyed the entire city, running purely on instinct. He eviscerated and fucking tortured the people who snapped the ability-restructing collar around Wade's neck. And once he got the name of their boss, he crunched their heads beneath his foot.

He went on a single-minded mission to obliterate every single last one of the people remotely involved in Wade's death. He didn't just stop at villainous bases—he murdered their families, the suppliers, everything. His signature was the claw marks he left behind.

He stopped caring about everything. He didn't sleep. Didn't eat. Never took a break. The only person that made his miserable life worth living was gone now. He jumped into each fight with reckless abandon, a complete disregard for his life or any injuries he could sustain. The only thing he cared about was violence. Revenge.

The X-men tried and failed to stop him, to get through to him. He snarled and pinned them to the ground or incapacitated them. He managed to get away or evade them each time.

Logan was once called the Worst Wolverine. The people in this universe were about to find out why.

[misc-oneshots]

Trust me

Logan can't understand your sudden aversion to him and it pisses him off.

Deadpool and wolverine based Logan x Y/N

Curvy!Slightly insecure reader

(Written and posted on my phone waiting for an appointment trying to get back into writing , please be forgiving)

------

If you pushed him away again Logan was going to lose his shit. You weren't injured, he'd have found any injuries with his hands or mouth in the evening in your bed and yet you'd started to push him away.

Anytime his hands found your hips, you stepped away from suddenly insistent you needed to speak to Wade about something. On an evening as soon as you reached the bedroom the lights were turned off, and stayed off, and you rolled away from his grasping hands to your own side of the bed.

At first, Logan was sure it was your period, you hated him grabbing at you at your time of the month but your smell never changed. Nothing with you had changed, except your behaviour, so it must have been something Logan had done. What else could it be?

He finally clicked one evening at Wade's flat. Everyone had come, a monthly dinner where everyone caught up that sometimes acted as an intervention for Al and her cocaine use. Logan wouldn't admit it outloud but it was nice. He'd missed having a family.

Logan's paws found your hips to pull you back into his lap. You squirmed and wiggled in his lap and not in that delightful way that you did when he was overstimulating you but to try and escape his grasp.

"Lo stop! I'll crush you." You hissed, not trying to draw attention to you both. Logan growled in your ear but let you go. He watched you the rest of the evening, slouched in his low chair, and you'd never felt more like prey.

---

"Y/N" He caught your attention as he entered your bedroom that night. He was fresh out the shower, towel hanging low on his hips.

"Yes love?" You answered absentmindedly. You kept your eyes on the book in your hands but your mind had already left the pages, captured by sinful thoughts of your lover who was currently shaking his body hair dry like the animal he was.

"Put your book down and lie down flat." He instructed and stepped towards the end on the bed. You flustered, you didn't want him undressing you right now. Last week you'd split your trousers getting into Dopinder's taxi and the embarrassment had taken over your mind. Every touch, every glance from Logan made you panic that he'd suddenly see your curves, that he praised with his hands and teeth, as newly embarrassing.

Logan's voice pulled you back to the moment, "Just trust me." His voice was steady, he wasn't flirting, he wasn't mad and you did trust him.

Bookmark back in place, you put your book on the nightstand and lay down flat in the middle of the bed. Your towel clad lover crawled onto the bed until he was over you.

"If it's too much tell me and I'll move." He told you and kissed the tip of your nose.

"If what's too much?" You asked but quickly realised what he meant as he started to sink his body down onto you putting his weight on his forearms on either side of you.

Fuck, he was heavy.

He wasn't even putting his full weight on you and it was enough to push the wind from your lungs. Had he always held back his full weight when you'd been together? Always stopped his full power when he'd taken you in bed?

You tapped his shoulder twice and he pushed himself up on his hands. "I have a metal skeleton," He growled as he pushed his face into your neck. He kissed and nipped your neck as he continued, "You are delicious and full bodied and I'm not sure why that's started to bother you."

You wiggled and tried I'm vain to escape his mouth. "I split my trousers the other day, it made me overthink." You admitted and managed to lace your fingers through his hair and pulled his head back so you could talk to his face.

"I've never disliked my body before but I was so embarrassed, I started to worry you'd see something bad in my figure." You admitted. "The only thing that's bad is it's covered." He kissed your deeply as he large hands went your sides to your thighs and pulled your legs up around his waist. His hand yanked the towel away from himself as he pushed himself further the kiss.

In the following blissful moments you realised you never need doubt yourself or your Wolverine, but if you did then he'd always be there to crush you.

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

one free pass for the grumpy!logan and overprotective brother!wade plot bunny 🤝🐇

"So," Vanessa hummed, watching you stir pans, "how was the date you went on?"

"He stood me up," you shrug. "I did get some really good gyoza though-"

"Sweetie."

You shrug again. "It's not the first time. And let's face it. It won't be the last. I write romance books. I don't live them."

Vanessa gave you a look but kept her commentary to herself. The last few years had been hard on everyone. You'd thought your big brother was dead right along next to her. You'd been in the thick of it even though you were trying to start college. Still just a kid. And in a lot of ways you were her rock- and a link to Wade when he was gone.

"I don't want to spend my whole life like our mom. Just like Wade doesn't want to be our dad, Nessa." You shake your head like you're banishing a thought and turn off the stove. "Let's fucking eat. I'm starving."

"This looks incredible. I have sex dreams less erotic than this."

"I heard that, Ow," Wade said, clutching his heart.

Vanessa shrugged and poured stroganoff into a bowl before shoving it into his hands, "Go be useful. Y/N did the hard part."

"Logan," you call, "I know you probably don't do wine, I got beer if you want that instead?"

"I uh- thanks," he said, shuffling to the table, offering Trigger his hand to smell when the dog shot him a look. He sniffed it and shot him a distinctly dirty look before walking away to re-glue himself to your side. Good dog, he thought.

"No assigned seating here, Logi-bear," Wade said, taking a seat next to Vanessa as he finished putting portions on plates- leaving Logan nowhere to sit but next to you since he'd put Mary in the other empty spot.

He nodded and pulled out a chair and looked towards the kitchen. He could hear you still rattling around and the sound of a knife slicing through something. And then a clatter "Fuck!"

Wade was out of his seat in a second and in the kitchen, "What'd you do- Holy shit biscuits!"

"It's fine I just-"

"Where d'you keep you towels?" he asked, rifling through the drawers and throwing things around.

"Next to the sink, Christ, it's not that bad-"

When you walk around the corner with Wade's arm around your shoulder, Logan blinked, blood-spattered your shirt and your pants. For "Not that bad" it looked like you might have cut your fucking hand off.

"I'll get some Ice," Vanessa said, standing up, "Logan, keep pressure on that for a second?"

Logan nodded, "Easy bleeder?" he ventured. You weren't phased enough about it for this to be new.

You nod and sigh, letting him look at your hand. "I've done worse," you muse. "He's so fucking dramatic." A thud makes you look away from the wound and Logan wrapped it to press on it carefully. "I swear if they're fucking in my kitchen again-"

"We're not," Vanessa said returning with an icepack, "I dropped the ice cream trying to find the ice."

"And Wade is-"

"Debating on if You'd want the staple gun or just super glue," he answered.

"There's bandages under the sink you degenerate!"

"Ooo, secrets," Wade said, dropping the stuff he was holding and heading towards the bathroom.

"Nessa," you plead.

"I'll go get him," she said rolling her eyes.

Logan exhaled through his nose and adjusted the ice on your hand. "I think you'll live, kid."

"Probably. I can hold this, your dinner is getting cold-"

Logan snorted, "Not a complete animal. Wouldn't be polite to eat while my hostess is bleeding out."

[weapon-xox]

Anything Wade could have said would be an understatement when it came to how much Logan fucking loved the snow.

Like the sweetest little puppy Wade has ever seen, next to Mary of course, the Wolverine would run up to the window, chirping at the snowflakes, clawing at the glass in a feeble attempt to play.

How could Wade deny him? He couldn't, simply wouldn't, because that would be cruel and in Wades eyes, means for a nosey neighbour (or a blind roommate) to call animal control for Logans own protection with how fucking loud he whined up at the Merc.

Eyes wide and wet, the saddest pout on the plumpest of lips, it was rare for Logan to be so vulnerable and atuned to his inner animal. But on soft days like these where the pair could be lazy, not a care in the whole entire world, with the snow falling light but landing heavy on the ground, Logan seemed to mellow out.

Wades working theory was that the snow reminded him of the harsh winters of Canada, where he'd stand in a storm and howl for hours and never get cold. Maybe he missed the freedom, to play and pounce, to just let go.

He'd think back to warm summer days, too, where Logan would take his shirt off and lay on the floor where a warm beam of sunlight shone in, much like a cat he would soak up the sun, Wade would try hard not to squeal and squirm when he'd hear the man purr.

Now, Logan was sat on his knees between Wades legs, metal joints nestled into a pillow on the floor and his scruffy cheek pressed to Wades thigh, while strong fingers cradled his ankles and Logan sighed sadly.

"What's the matter, Peanut? Thinking about that barren waste land of hell frozen over you called home?"

Logan huffed from his nose. Wade scratched behind his ear.

"You wanna... Play? Huh?"

Logans ears fucking twitched, Wade was sure, and he looked up curiously with a tilt of his head.

"That it? You wanna play, boy? Wanna jump around in the sno-" Before Wade could finish Logan was up, boots on and laced, the new winter coat Wade had bought him on and zipped up. He looks so cute, Wade thought to himself, because Logan would probably argue-

"I ain't cute, bub. Let's go."

Did he say that outloud?

"Yes," Logan growled.

"Did I say that outloud?" Wade asked, and the Wolverine couldn't help but smile, small and barely there, but it was there, and Wade saw it and it was glorious.

"Gosh, everytime a Wolverine smiles, an angel dies. Or however the saying goes." Wade droned, on and on, Logan growing impatient, huffing and tugging at Wades arm to just get him to come on already while Deadpool took his time putting on his coat and shoes.

Wade gave Mary a treat, yelled a "goodbye bitch!" to Al, grabbed his keys and let Logan drag him outside.

They walked to the park, no one was there. Wade could hear Logan sigh in relief, watched him shrug off his coat and shoes. He furrowed his non-brows and mock scowled with his hands on his hips, said "you're gonna catch a cold!", and when Logan honest to god laughed Wade nearly threw up his heart.

Logan dropped his coat, shook his head when his soft hair had a little too much snow pile up, and slowly backed up, predatory, baring his teeth at Wade while getting down to his haunches and in position, hairy toes burrowed in the snow.

Wade grinned in return, rolled his neck, and opened his arms wide. If Logan wanted to play, he'd play.

"Come and get me, Peanut. Paint the snow red with our love."

The Wolverine snarled, pounced and drove his claws into Wade, who in turn laughed and shoved him off easily. While Logan was distracted, biting at the air to try and eat each snowflake, Wade tickled his sides and Logan crumbled, falling into the snow where he was wrestled with and roughed up.

He looked so happy, all happy growls and playful nips, fingers sinking into the snow for a firm grip but faceplanting when the snow turned out to be too soft for any real leverage.

They stayed outside for hours, Wade tapping out when he got to cold and just wanted to watch Logan play. The Wolverine, ever the gentleman he was, set his coat down on a bench for Wade to sit on. The snow soaked through fast, the jacket already damp from Logans carelessness, and Wades ass was now wet, but it was so worth it to watch his boy play, smile, have fun.

The Merc let him play for hours, face half buried now in his scarf, hugging himself for warmth because his personal space heater was rolling around in the snow, his clothes were soaked, and while the Wolverine didn't seem to bothered Wade figured soaking wet jeans just couldn't be comfortable.

He whistled, got Logans attention who perked right up and bounded over to Wade, shaking his head like an overexcited puppy, the water and flakes from his hair smacking Wade in the face. He just smiled, wide and bright.

"There's my pretty boy. Did you have fun in the snow, Kujo? I know, a little less blood shed and murder than you would've liked, but you really showed those snowflakes whose boss!"

They head back home, Logan shed his clothes at the door. Wade admired Canadas ass, whistled, and followed the feral turned domestic into the bathroom.

They showered, warm and comfortable, Wade washing Logans hair while the other washed Wades body. They got out, put on their comfiest pj's consisting of plaid pants with no shirt, and Wade wearing one of his longest, softest sweaters, nothing underneath because the bottom of the sweater made it halfway down his plush thighs and covered just enough to keep Logan guessing.

Logan growled, hands on Wades rear, and pulled him into his lap where the Merc yawned and sighed with content, cheek pressed against a forest of hair, the rythmatic thumping of what Wade would call a heart beating from behind the bushes.

Mary hopped up, did a little spin, then flopped and pressed herself up against Logans thigh, a hand on her belly that made her tongue lull out of her mouth. Wade looked awful similar, the same blissed out look on his face.

"That was... Fun," Logan muttered, eyes half closed in sleep. Wade looked up at him, felt his stomach clench with the aggression he felt for Logans sweetness, and pressed a hand to his cheek. Logan leaned into the touch.

"I know, baby. We can go out and play again tomorrow, deal?"

Logan smiled, closed his eyes, and sunk further into the couch with a gentle hum and a quiet "mhm..."

Wade fell asleep, dreaming about their day, and all the new ways he could get Logan to smile again.

Playing in the snow was just the start.

[striveattemptfail]

a cursed realization: wade and logan are old men. logan especially so.

they MUST have weird old man habits and general body weirdness. and not the endearing shit like preferring to use old school tech, or having a "get off my lawn, my favourite miscreants" kinda attitude, or being unable to keep up in sex, or any of that kinda cute stuff

i mean the unpleasant sweaty old man smell, having walking farts, snoring while awake, their stomachs just making noises for no goddamn reason bc their digestive systems are no longer 30 y/o

all of which they don't even realize they're doing bc they're old and either a) have more pressing things to worry about [at their age]; b) stopped giving a fuck; or c) both of the above

source: i live with two very old men (my dad and uncle). one is a few years away from retirement and the other is already at that age. they are family but they are still gross old men who act like drunk uncles given half the chance

and while neither logan or wade are in their 60s, these habits don't just magically appear once you hit that age. they begin long before that and accumulate over time until the stinky old man package is complete

"but jercy," you say, "they have perfect regeneration!! they can't have any health problems!! they're too self-conscious to be that gross!!"

1: (re: perfect regeneration) that is an even worse argument for wade, who has mega cancer and canonically does not smell pleasant or have a properly functioning body. he'd 100% have old man problems as a symptom of his cancer bc his mutation is physically keeping him in a constant state of dying. everything he does is out of sheer stubbornness and willpower to make a joke out of his life

1b: to play on a popular headcanon: any aromatic, artificial fruity skincare routine he has can easily be used as a reason for him to cover up his old man smell

2: see point B above for logan

2b: see the movie, logan (2017), or the comic, death of wolverine (2014), for the fact that logan can canonically age/die. albeit it's at a vastly slower pace than everyone else, but it means logan WILL eventually have these issues with his body too, if he doesn't have them already

2c: feral/animalistic logan who takes on animal traits would be so much worse bc wolverines are called "skunk bears" for a reason. wolverines (and any wildlife/animal that you can compare logan to) fucking STINK!! they have EVEN GROSSER ANIMAL HABITS!! you just gotta accept it

3: (re: self-consciousness) you got a point there, but once again refer to point B. most folks i know at their age are on their way to or have already stopped caring about what others think of them. and even if wade and logan are somehow the exceptions to this, i'm sure they let loose in private and probably indulge in their grosser habits when they're alone

4: if you want biblically accurate old man yaoi you're gonna have to contend with the fact that it comes with the non-sexy old man problems. i'm sorry i have to break the illusion but this is the reality we must face together

5: suspension of disbelief, friends. do engage with that once in a while lol

in conclusion: i unfortunately have every bit of confidence that wade and logan are not exempt from old man behaviours and bodily functions and i will die whining about it. thanks for coming to my ted talk

[wadewnstonwilson]

not helpin' your case.

summary: wade refuses to let logan sink into despair, constantly teasing him to lighten the mood. logan pretends to be annoyed, he secretly appreciates wade's presence, which keeps him grounded.

warnings: post deadpool & wolverine ("worst" logan!variant), none just fluffy goodness

word count: 1.4k

a/n: okay so i absolutely adore writing for wade because my adhd gets to go off the rails. tons of fluff, tons of dumb idiots being dumb idiots. i'll probably keep my poolverine fics to one shots because i just like little things of them here and there but enjoy!

Logan’s healing factor made him damn near indestructible. No matter how many bullets tore through him, how deep claws or blades sank into his flesh, his body always knitted itself back together as if nothing had happened. But the pain? He felt every second of it. The tearing, the ripping, the burning. The scars may not last long, but the memory of the agony lingered.

The physical pain, though, was the easy part. Logan could take a punch, a bullet, or an explosion and keep going. What he couldn't shake were the emotional scars. Decades—no, centuries—of loss, betrayal, and endless fighting. It was a constant burden, a weight that settled deep in his bones, refusing to let go. The faces of the people he'd lost, the betrayals he'd suffered—they all haunted him in the quiet moments, in the dark of night when the world stopped and there was nothing left but his thoughts.

And then, there was Wade.

The walking contradiction, the human cartoon, the man who turned every nightmare into a punchline. Wade had his own trauma—probably more than Logan, though it was hard to tell with him—but Wade’s way of dealing with it? He laughed. He made jokes, crude, sharp, and relentless. Where Logan brooded, Wade cracked jokes. Where Logan tried to bottle it all up, Wade exploded with it in a constant barrage of sarcasm and humor.

And while it drove Logan insane, it also saved him. Wade didn’t let him sink into the darkness. Wade wouldn’t let him dwell on the pain for too long. No, Wade kept him tethered to reality, whether Logan liked it or not.

“Yo, Claws!” Wade’s voice cut through Logan’s thoughts like a knife. “What’s with that resting murder face? You’ve been staring out that window for, like, an hour. What, are you brooding about your tragic past again? Or are you just trying to figure out where your hairline went wrong?”

Logan, arms crossed, leaning against the window frame, didn’t even flinch. He’d gotten used to Wade’s voice crashing into his internal monologues like a freight train. He grunted in response, refusing to turn around.

Wade was sprawled out on the couch, his legs kicked up on the armrest, a katana in his hands that he was polishing far too enthusiastically. “Come on, man, you can’t be doing the brooding thing again. You’ve got more angst than a whole squad of moody teenagers at a My Chemical Romance concert. What’s going on in that big, furry head of yours? Still thinking about your tragic backstory? We get it—everyone you’ve ever loved has died, you’ve got an animal inside you, blah blah blah. Yawn.”

Logan’s lips twitched, though he didn’t give Wade the satisfaction of turning around. “I’m not brooding,” he muttered, voice low and gruff.

Wade sat up dramatically, hand on his chest like Logan had just insulted his honor. “Oh, really? And I’m not wearing pants!” He stood up, glancing down at his fully clothed legs with an exaggerated gasp. “Oh fuck, wait, I am wearing pants! Looks like we’re both liars, Lo.”

Logan finally turned, slowly, his arms still crossed over his chest. “You ever stop talking?”

Wade grinned, sauntering over with the swagger of a man who absolutely loved hearing himself speak. He tilted his head at Logan, his eyes glinting with mischief. “Nah. Someone’s gotta keep you from turning into a walking tragedy, and I guess that’s my job now. You’re welcome, by the way.”

Logan let out a long, slow sigh, rubbing his hand over his face. “I don’t brood.”

Wade poked him in the chest, right between his crossed arms. “Sure you don’t, Moody McStabberson. You just stand by windows staring off into the distance, thinking about all the people who betrayed you, probably playing sad music in your head. Real original, man. What’s next? You gonna write some dark poetry and start a Tumblr?”

Logan couldn’t help it this time. His lips quirked, just a bit. “You’re ridiculous,” he muttered, shaking his head.

Wade threw himself back onto the couch, dramatically flinging his legs back up as if the weight of the world was too much for him. “Ridiculously awesome, you mean,” he shot back, grabbing the TV remote and flipping through channels. “So what’s it gonna be tonight, claws? You wanna watch some depressing documentary about the fall of the Roman Empire or maybe something more your speed, like... I don’t know... a show about emotionally constipated loners who don’t know how to ask for help?”

Logan moved from the window, finally sitting down beside Wade, though he didn’t say a word. Wade’s constant barrage of sarcasm and jokes was like background noise now, a familiar hum that kept him grounded, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

Wade’s face lit up as he found some late-night talk show with overly enthusiastic hosts and an absurd number of bright lights. “Oh, shit, this looks good,” he said, grinning. “Nothing like watching rich assholes pretend to care about regular people. Warms my heart.”

Logan leaned back, rubbing his temples as the bright lights of the show flashed across the room. “You’re gonna give me a headache.”

Wade shot him a grin, clearly delighted. “Aw, come on, Logie Bear. I know you’re having fun. You can’t lie to me. I’ve seen that twitch of a smile, you can’t hide it. Admit it, I make your life better.”

Logan let out a soft, begrudging chuckle, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’re a pain in my ass, Wade.”

“Hey, I’m not the one who took a bullet to the ass last week and then said it was ‘just a scratch’,” Wade said, flipping the channel again. “Seriously, I had to fucking dig a bullet out of your hairy Canadian ass, but sure, just a scratch. How’s the ass feeling now, by the way?”

Logan snorted—a rare sound from him—and Wade’s grin widened like he’d just won the lottery. He leaned over, jabbing Logan in the side with his elbow. “Admit it, you love when I get all Florence Nightingale on you. It’s like a sexy version of a nurse, except with more swearing, fewer clothes, and zero actual medical knowledge.”

Logan rolled his eyes, shaking his head. “You’re not helping your case.”

Wade nudged him again, his voice full of teasing. “Oh, come on. You know I’m the only person who can make you crack that grumpy exterior. It’s like my superpower—breaking through the Wolverine angst. And trust me, pumpkin, I love using it.”

Logan finally gave in, a soft chuckle escaping him. “Yeah, you’re real special, Wade.”

“You bet your sweet ass I am,” Wade said, stretching out on the couch, draping his legs across Logan’s lap like it was the most natural thing in the world. He flipped through the channels with his usual reckless abandon, not really looking for anything specific—just something to keep the noise going.

For a moment, the two of them sat there in companionable silence, the TV flickering in the background. Wade’s energy, usually a hurricane, seemed to settle, just for a moment. His legs were still draped lazily over Logan’s lap, his head resting back against the couch cushion, and Logan found himself relaxing, the tension in his shoulders finally easing.

“You ever stop to think,” Logan began, his voice low and thoughtful, “that maybe you’re the reason I’m not as messed up as I could be?”

Wade paused, remote still in his hand, his gaze flicking up to meet Logan’s. For a second, the sarcasm faded, the usual wall of jokes and bravado dropping. Wade tilted his head, a soft smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“I kinda figured that was the deal.” He winked, the sass returning full force. “But don’t go getting all mushy on me, alright? I’ve got a reputation to uphold. I mean, I’m an asshole, not a Hallmark card.”

Logan chuckled, shaking his head. “Yeah, wouldn’t want that."

Wade leaned back, kicking his legs up higher as he flipped to another channel. “You need me, Peanut. Admit it.”

Logan didn’t respond right away, but as he glanced over at Wade—at the way his presence filled the room with life, with noise, with something that kept Logan’s mind from spiraling into the dark places it so often wandered—he knew Wade was right. The man was a walking disaster, but he was Logan’s disaster.

“I guess I do,” Logan said softly, and for once, Wade didn’t make a joke.

Instead, he smiled, turning his attention back to the TV, his legs still draped lazily across Logan’s lap.

And for a little while, everything felt just a little bit easier.

[leviackermanstoes]

CHARLES XAVIER IS HOT? -WADE

Logan howlett x reader

-

DEADPOOL AND WOLVERINE SPOILERS!!! AND DAYS OF FUTURE PAST BUT I CAN ONLY HOPE EVERYONE HAS SEEN THAT.

-

Warnings: erm idk. Kinda a short one. All will make sense soon. God help me. Major Canon divergence

-

When i first joined the x-mansion as a student, Charles Xavier was old. Though I had heard from plenty of people who knew him as a young adult that he was rather good looking.

I refused to think of my old and wrinkly professor in that way. Mostly because he'd see it and be absolutely horrified I assume.

-

"Logan, I don't think there's anyone here," I stated as he approached the mansion.

Covered in vines and surrounded by rotting timber and splintering trees, the x mansion had Definitely seen better days.

"It's not looking likely that's For sure" he replied.

"Do you guys think Happy Wheels will be here? God I wanna see that old fucker"

Wade was trying to be funny, but Logan and I just glared at him and kept walking. The door to the mansion was rotting and chipping away.

"I think we're in the past" I said, guessing mostly.

Logan pushed open the door gently, and inside stood one man. He was raggedy and bearded.

"Who the hell are you?" I asked the stranger.

"My name is Charles Xavier," he stated, "the real question is who are you? All of you"

"Ho-ly fuck! Charles Xavier is hot?" Wade Gasped loudly with his hands to his mouth

"Was" Logan corrected

"I don't knooooow. I'd let old rolly hit it too"

Me and logan both made disgusted noises.

-

🧠

When Xavier first learnt, I could also use telepathy. It was when I tried to kill Jean. He stopped me and told me to find him in the office.

He tried to help me control it and tried to help me let it get under control so that I wouldn't go insane. But I did. I went crazy, and I would scream and cry and yell and rattle the walls.

And then, one day, without any warning.

It stopped.

I never rattled another wall again

-

"So, you're all from the future?" Charles furrowed his eyebrows.

"More or less, yeah, we're not supposed to be here" Logan spoke.

Well, we have been here before technically. We're just a bit out of time. I scratched my neck awkwardly.

"We didn't necessarily come here to find you. We just have to get back home" I said to charles

Wade's mouth was still agape. "Jesus, you are gorgeous, aren't you?" He was close and personal with Charles, he might as well have been inside his skin.

"Jesus man, have you ever heard of personal space or decency?" Charles scoffed and stood up, walking away from wades perverse self.

"And turn those fucking thoughts off" Charles groaned and pointed to Wade.

"Listen. I know how crazy we are from the future sounds. But to make things worse, you're also a professor in the future, and you teach" I pointed to me and Logan "us"

"I can't help you guys, i don't know what to do" Charles shrugged.

-

Why do you stick by him?

You love him, don't you?

-

🧠

By far, my weirdest interaction in the TVA was when i met a variant of Xavier, and he seemed to know me quite well. He could name my favourite colour, food, even my favourite candle and my favourite animal.

Upon closer inspection, i saw a ring on his finger. Sparkling gold with a small blue gem. I didn't bother to ask what the blue meant, I only knew that my ring on my finger was the same.

It became clear then that this was a Xavier variant I may have married in a way distant universe.

I called for the immediate expulsion of the variant instantly after.

-

Don't let him go

Do it I dare you

You love him

You love him

You love him

He's not yours

You can't do this

Don't do this

Don't do it

It's not right

-

"Charles?" I said.

It was nighttime. We were forced to take shelter in the mansion as we knew we had nowhere else to go.

"Yes?" The bearded man turned to me

"Can you do me a favor?"

-

[bravetimetravellingaussie]

Walk

Poolverine oneshot

Summary: they're making their way downtown, walking slow because their dog has very short legs

Warnings: foul language, deadpool and wolverine are in this, consider yourself warned

"I'm going out with Mary, might stop by the store or something, you want anything?" Logan asked as he clipped a leash on Mary Puppins.

"Oh, sure. Well, I do need some things, it'd probably be easier if I just came with you though."

"Hurry up then and let's go."

"Let's fucking go," Wade snickered under his breath.

As they made their way out of the apartment, they bumped into a neighbour, with whom Logan exchanged a polite smile and a 'good morning'.

"Hey, peanut, can you pinch me real quick?"

"Why?"

"Oh, nevermind."

"Hey, peanut, you looked so cheery earlier. I would've stayed home if you didn't want me tagging along on your morning walk."

Logan didn't ease up his frown. "You got a problem with my face, bub?"

"No, of course not. But your resting bitch face was a little less severe before we left the house."

"Keep talking like that and you won't have a face."

"Man I love our threat of great violence banter."

They carried on walking in silence. There were no more goodmornings. In fact, nobody gave them a second look. Quite on the contrary, they seemed to be avoiding looking at them.

"This is weird," Wade said, more to himself than anyone else.

"Well, I'm sorry I don't feel like smiling and engaging in small talk all the time, bub." Logan sounded increasingly irritated.

"No, it's not- I'm used to you being an off-putting grouch, what I'm not used to is-"

Wade looked back and forth between Logan and the people who quickly looked away the second they saw his rather threatening countenance. And they didn't look back. That's what was weird, Wade was so used to people staring at him or giving him a double take when they walked past, he barely noticed it until it was gone.

Wade gasped and let out a muffled squeal of delight.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, bub?"

"I've got scary dog privilege," Wade told Mary Puppins, crouching down to give her ear a good scratch.

"Mary is tiny, who the fuck could possibly be scared by-"

You could almost hear the cogs turning in Logan's brain.

"Did you just fucking-"

"You know, a lot of people could be scared of Mary Puppins, don't diminish the experiences of people with animal trauma, peanut, you'll make the proofreader feel bad."

"What are you talking about?"

"Now be honest, peanut, were you making yourself look scary on purpose?"

Logan's nose twitched and he bared his teeth a little.

"You were! Oh-my-fucking-rom-com, you were being scary on purpose, you big softie."

Logan humphed but didn't argue. Wade skipped along all the way to the grocery store.

"I have to pop by the pharmacy real quick before we can head home. Blind Al wanted me to pick up a prescription for her."

"I picked up Althea's meds for her yesterday."

"Oh, well these are different ones."

"Oh, OK. Well I might as well go in with you, say hi to the pharmacist, we've gotten quite friendly, seeing as how I always go get Althea's prescriptions for her."

"Fine! Enough with the mind games and light guilt tripping! I was going to- well the lemon and seltzer water weren't doing enough so I figured I'd try something else. I read on the Internet that-"

"What blood stains, Wade? You haven't gone on any missions recently."

"Yeah, well, remember how you warned you might stab me in your sleep, you did, and I didn't want to say anything because that seems like a touchy subject and the stabbing doesn't really bother me, it's not like we haven't stabbed each other before, and I was worried you might-"

"Shit, Wade."

"Logan? It's not a big deal."

Logan felt his nails digging into the palm of his hand. It was true that he'd beaten the shit out of Wade before, and vice versa, and they were both fine, but damn it, he hated not being in control. He hated lashing out at the people who chose to be there, the people who chose to care. He thought he'd been getting better at that, but he hadn't even noticed-

"Logan, snap out of it."

Logan bit the inside of his cheek so hard he could taste blood.

"You warned me, and I was okay with it. I still am." Wade gently placed his hands on Logan's shoulders. "Look if the nightmares bother you that much, maybe you can find a support group for veterans or traumatised superheroes - god knows there should be one of those, a lot of problems could be avoided if superpowered individuals got the emotional support they needed - or I don't know, I don't think we can afford to get you therapy, but you have people now Logan. You have Blind Al, and Mary Puppins. And me. You can talk to us. But I am not letting you push me away, no siree. If you want off the couch you're going to have to fight me. Understood?"

Logan's frown seemed more confused than angry now.

"I may have to start sleeping shirtless so you don't ruin and more of my t-shirts, though. I hope you don't mind. Tit for tit or something like that."

All of Logan's energy was being used on trying not to cry at that point, but he couldn't help a small smile at that last bit.

"Now that that's sorted. Let's go home."

[artemis-pendragon]

Logan and Wade Meet the God Killer chapter two electric boog-a-fucking-loo is up boys (gn)

CHAPTER TWO: GOING DOWN (BUT NOT IN THE SEXY WAY, YOU FILTHY ANIMALS) BY FALL OUT BOY

Wade loved saying dumbass shit. It was his favorite hobby, now that the thrill of near-death experiences had worn off. His hobby had cost him the structural integrity of every bone in his body at least once—yes, you freaks, even that one—and he could've filled an Olympic swimming pool with the blood he'd lost in the past few months alone. Which, yeah, seems like a lot, right? And it was. Unfortunately, for what had started as a mediocre jaunt into Human Trafficking Central, things had gone south faster than Wade's blood when Googling "hot pictures of Captain America". Any iteration, honestly, but he had a weakness for the big ol' softy in cashmere sweaters.

About half of the theoretical swimming pool could be attributed to the past 24 hours. He'd taken some beatings before—in fact, some of his favorite beatings had been at the adamantium-clawed hands of his roommate-slash-bestie-slash-super-hot-brooding-romantic-interest—but this one had gone on for fucking ever. He had to give it to these goons, they did not know when to quit. He could respect that. It was impressive enough that they'd bagged him in the first place, but managing to keep him down? Not bad for a bunch of one-dimensional side characters in villain-coded jumpsuits.

AO3 LINK BABYYYY

LOGAN AND WADE MEET THE GOD KILLER (100 TIMES!)

If being an annoying roommate were an Olympic sport, Wade would be decapitated by the weight of his gold medals. He's bad at cooking, he talks more than a late night host, and hate-watches shows because he thinks it's funny, even if Logan very much does not. He's a total dick who thinks he's funnier than he is, he's got a range of mental issues that would leave Freud foaming at the mouth, and he sometimes disappears all day without warning, most likely to go hang out with his maybe-kinda-girlfriend.

Logan stays anyway.

But after Logan has a weird dream in which he's accosted by some sort of nightmare entity asking after his location (which, yikes, stranger danger), Wade goes missing. And despite their joint reputations for being the cockroachiest men who ever lived on God's decreasingly green Earth, Logan gets the feeling that something is wrong. He's right, and ends up stuck in a time loop in some shitty D-tier timeline void where time repeats every time its anchor being dies. And this timeline? It's claimed Wade as its anchor.

This is the story of how Logan Howlett somehow has the worst day of his life, and then has it 100 more times. Hasta la vista, sanity!

AO3 LINK FOR THE GAY FREAKS LESSGOOO

[twilightkitkat]

Time travel GO!

OK let's go.

Like you said, it's a really interesting theory that Worst Wolverine is from the Origins Universe. It matches up with his story considering he seemed confused by Wade's existence, meaning that Deadpool likely wasn't an active vigilante in his universe. This would be plausible if Wade had been essentially "killed" (stripped of his free will) during the Weapon X program. Also, Logan in Origins was a little different than how he acted in the OG X-men films and his personality aligns a bit more with Worst Wolverine. Origin's plotline would account for him being extra cagey and distrustful of the world and the X-men, because his own brother and teammates turned against him in the past.

Logan always struggled with memory problems. Except in his world since he never joined the X-men, he never really fully "remembered" his past. He eventually discovered what Stryker did to him, but not the extent of his involvement in the Weapon X program. It bothered him, but eventually, he tried to move on.

Except he and Wade are up against a villain from another universe. With TVA's ability to time and dimension travel. Right as they're about to finish him off, he hits an emergency button on a device he has and sends them back in time.

Except he latched onto the point where Logan's memory was the weakest and sent him there in hopes that he'd fuck up the timeline enough to never come to Wade's Universe. So that he wouldn't fight them.

So Wade and Logan get sent back in time. Except that Wade remembers and Logan... doesn't. His memories were already spotty at best and were sealed behind a barrier.

The Origins Weapon X program was a little different from the one Wade remembered, but it was so nauseatingly familiar. When he sees Logan with his brother Victor, he damn near starts ugly sobbing. Except for the fact that Logan is ignoring him. He isn't looking at him or talking to him and he's acting like he doesn't remember anything.

It's only when he raises an unamused eyebrow and asks, "The fuck do you need, Wilson?" that Wade realizes how deep in shit he is. Time travel is hard enough, but without Logan's cooperation? In a time before Wade even had his fucking mutant abilities? No thanks...

Wade tries to get closer to Logan. To prod him to remember. Occasionally, Logan looks a little moved by his words, only to get a piercing headache and forget about it. He thinks Wade's schizophrenic and delusional and Wade can't do shit to change it.

So he switches gears. The best thing he could do right now is try to get buddy-buddy with past Wolvie, right? He starts following him on missions, separating him from Victor, and talking Logan's ear off. Logan is annoyed but it's also nice to be around someone who has a shred of empathy for civilians. Who isn't a bloodthirsty psychopath. So he reluctantly lets him in.

So they become close friends. Wade obviously feels more than that, but what can he do? This was a time when being gay was like a death sentence, and Logan was almost 200 years old. He'd had it ingrained into his head and it took years in modern society to undo that shit.

Logan starts feeling a little hot and bothered around Wade, but doesn't know why. The guy pisses him off but this isn't just that? He kind of wants to yank him closer and just... hold him there. But that can't be right. Firstly, Wade is a man. Secondly, Logan isn't Like That. He's a killing machine, an animal. He doesn't deserve nice things.

But Logan starts to have second thoughts. He starts to doubt what he's doing is right. And this time, with someone other than Victor around, he can share his frustrations. Occasionally he gets drunk enough let himself be vulnerable around Wade (only Wade). He tells him how he hates killing, how he just wants to live a peaceful life, how he can't keep doing this anymore. Wade listens to him and comforts him. Tells him he knows. (Holds him quietly when Logan finally lets himself cry. Logan might not say anything the next day, but he stays so close to Wade that their shoulders are brushing and that's all Wade needs to know he appreciates it.)

And so this continues until Logan decides to quit the Weapon X project. And Wade doesn't exactly know what overcame him in that moment, but he followed Logan. He knows he should let the plot run its course but he couldn't. Not when Logan was disappearing from sight and all Wade could remember was a much older Logan from the future about to walk away until he called out for him.

Logan turns around, angry and cautious and fucking terrified because he's leaving behind the only life he'd ever known. And there was Wade, who'd been there for him through all this shit, grinning awkwardly and holding out his dog tags.

"Twinsies?" Wade chuckles as he places them into Logan's hand. Logan can't decide whether to strangle or hug him, so he settles on a combination.

He punches Wade in the shoulder and mutters, "Asshole," and then wraps him in the most bone-crushingly tight hug he can manage. He clings to Wade like a lifeline, like he can't believe he's real, and it's only then that Wade notices he's shaking.

And... oh.

The realization hits him that it wasn't easy for Logan at all. To leave behind his brother who he'd been with his whole life, the only person who couldn't die like him and understood his instincts. To see Victor become someone unrecognizable, tainted by greed and bloodlust. To leave behind the only semblance of familiarity he knew because the guilt was eating him alive.

Wade can't just abandon him. Can't leave him alone to suffer and become the hardened shell of a man he should have become. He isn't thinking about the future ramifications when he takes Logan by the shoulders, grins, and says he knows a way out. Later that night, he manages to borrow a boat from a coastal settlement in exchange for a warning about Stryker. Logan looks dazed next to him as he easily manages to secure an escape route.

(How long would it have taken him before? When he didn't have a translator? How much did he suffer originally?)

And so they run away together. To Canada, where Wade knew Logan would choose to settle. And Wade meets the woman who would have been Logan's wife, in the original timeline. She's sweet and cute and reminds him of Vanessa in a way that makes him viciously homesick. He can see why Logan liked her.

But they don't end up together. Logan is oddly on guard around her, frowning as she chats happily with Wade. Wade might be a little wary because he knows she's a spy, but Logan should have no reason to be so cagey. When she turns to Logan to flirt, he shuts her down immediately and harshly. He storms off and drags Wade with him. (If Wade didn't know better, it almost looked like he was jealous.)

Later that night, Wade brings her up again. Says that she's pretty and seems interested in Logan. It pains him a little, but it's how the timeline is supposed to go. Logan sneers in response before schooling his face into an expression of indifference and asks him what he thinks of her.

Wade... doesn't know what came over him, suddenly, but he feels a sudden urge to be honest. Maybe it's homesickness or just being sick of bottling up his emotions, but he tells Logan that she reminds him of Vanessa.

Logan's eyes are piercing when he asks who she is. Wade says that she was someone he loved, once. That he thought he'd be together with her forever. That he planned to get married and start a family with her. It tumbles out suddenly, like it was stuck in his throat and he had to throw it up or it'd choke him.

Logan tenses beside him. He stares at his hands blankly, and asks quietly, "Do you miss her?"

Wade hears it for the question it is: "Do you regret being with me?"

So Wade drops against Logan's shoulder and grabs his hand and answers honestly, "I loved her, once. But I'm here now. This is my life." The you're my life goes unspoken.

But Logan hears it anyway, and suddenly he's surging to meet Wade's lips, desperately and hungrily. He's pushing him down and looking at him frantically like he can't quite understand his own feelings but he can't stop them either. And then Wade reaches up, cradles his cheek, and kisses him back. Logan melts into him and clings to Wade so tightly he leaves bruises.

Things are different, after that. Wade and Logan unofficially become a couple, away from the public eye. They live a simple but happy life. Logan and Wade both work at the construction company, with Logan as the lumberjack and Wade as one of the builders. It's not the best money he's made, but it'll do.

Except for the fact that Wade is aware their time together has a limit. And he's even more aware that if he goes down the same road as he did originally, he'll die. Narratively speaking, he replaced Logan's wife as the "leverage to use against him." He knew that meant that Victor would come for his ass first. And Wade unfortunately doesn't have his healing factor yet, which makes him even more vulnerable. He may be stronger and more skilled than Kayla Silverfox, but he can't win against an infinite regen hack.

So he starts planning. He gets in touch with some of the black market channels he knew existed at the time. He gets into some shady mercenary work, just like his past life. It's a lot easier when he knows the ropes. He saves up money and hoards it under the floorboards, alongside a special gun he'd managed to get. One with adamantium bullets.

Here's the thing: Wade loves Logan. He does. He had no intention of "fooling" him with their time together. But here's another thing: Wade isn't stupid. He can't live in the delusion that he'll somehow be safe just because he isn't Kayla. He knows how the story goes. And he knows that if he tries to explain to Logan, he'll forget it immediately. He can't work to create a plan with Logan when the universe seems dead set on keeping him in the dark.

But Wade has hope. Maybe he'll be able to escape with Logan, as soon as Victor's time to shine comes close. And soon it does. He's been keeping tabs on his ex-teammates religiously, so when he hears about the first death he knows what to do.

He brings it up to Logan, prepared to flee with him, to fight together to break apart Stryker's plans, and Logan... looks at him blankly. Like he doesn't understand. So Wade tries again, more frantically, and Logan's brain refuses to let him register it. He asks why he's upset, what Wade wants for dinner, and Wade...

Wade collapses to the ground, shaking. The universe wouldn't fucking let him. It was like an immune system fighting against the intruder in the timeline to cut off the infection. It'd let him stay by Logan's side, for now, and change little things... but it refused to let him change the key events. The anchor points tying the universe together.

Wade goes through the motions numbly, after that. Logan can clearly see something's wrong, and tries cornering him a few times, but Wade brushes it off. He can't deal with that again.

Logan's mind is clearly being fucked with. His memories were sealed from the beginning, and his mind seemed to reject any notion of familiarity. Maybe it was the villain's fault, instead of the universe's. In which case, what could be his end goal? This would just cause things to turn out like they did originally, which would be bad for him. (Unless he had a moment he'd step in. A single moment to intercept. Like them meeting in the bar.)

Then, on the night before Victor arrives, Wade puts his plan into action. He grabs the gun and the money stuffs it into his backpack before he leaves for work. He kisses Logan goodbye at their parting point and walks off with a grim look on his face.

The air has a chill to it that can't just be explained away by the cold. The forest seems distorted. Wade can just feel that it's getting close. He hides the bag in a place only he would know to check that wouldn't be suspicious if Logan caught his scent.

Then he "leisurely" strolls out into the woods, whistling with his hands in his pockets without a care in the world. (He's very tense, actually.)

It's then that Victor pounces. Pinning him to the ground, grinning viciously. "Wilson," he punctuates with his claws pushing closer to his throat, "what a pleasure to know that my brother keeps you as company."

But just as Wade predicted, he doesn't kill him. He cuts him, letting enough of his blood spill to be assumed dead, and then hauls him over his shoulder when he's assured Wade can't move. Fucking figures, they needed an experimental subject anyway.

He wakes up later, in a daze, to being chained down on a table in the lab. Wow, so original. Never been done before. He'd wondered how exactly his role as "Logan's wife" and "Deadpool" would meet, but this was roughly what he'd expected. His genes were the next best thing to Logan's, a way to test out the product with room for failure before the next big thing.

(He wondered how Logan felt when he assumed him dead. Did he storm up to Victor, like last time? Was he more or less mad? Did he cry? Victor wasn't here, had that happened yet or not?)

Wade was no stranger to the fucked-up-experimental-torture routine, so when Stryker entered, he didn't act surprised at all.

"Damn, that's crazy," he said blankly. "So you were secretly running a mutant weapon experimentation program this whole time? Weapon X was so cleverly named after the X gene? What a plot twist."

Stryker looks... shocked at his nonchalance. He gets pissed, too, but it's the anxiety as he asks how the fuck Wade figured that out that clues him in. So people other than Logan can still hear him loud and clear... interesting. He can still influence the world.

He riles Stryker up a bit more, pushes all the right buttons (imagines him as Francis, speaking in the exact same way) and he gets what he wants. Stryker snarls at him, tells him he'll show him how to behave, and decides to torture him.

Now's his chance. "Hate to inform you but I already got a free trial of the kitty cat claws. The only way you'd manage to shut me up would be to strangle me," Wade snorts.

And bingo. Stryker mutters that he'll suffocate him just enough to be painful, putting on gloves and eyeing him with a sadistic viciousness only rivaled in Francis himself.

Wade ignores the instinctive panic at the thought of suffocation and focuses on the bright side. Under the same circumstances, he should trigger his mutation early, right?