#Like sometimes I compare like freshman me and people I knew freshman year to the bad kids and I’m like “????”

[rooolt]

I’ve been trying to think abt why the bad kids don’t read as teenagers to me that much and I really just think they’re not messy enough. Like this is part of the reason I think the seven is so good bc there’s so much subtle infighting and passive aggressiveness while they all continue to be friends that reads so thoroughly as teenage girls to me, and that’s not to say that no teenagers have healthy relationships with their friends and that they all have to secretly hate each other, but idk the bad kids are like too polished to me. They don’t really mess up or say the wrong thing TO EACH OTHER (which I feel like may be an intrepid heroes problem across the board) and there’s really not that much interesting complexity of teenage relationships in them. The way they talk to where a lot of the time they’re like “ah yes I’ve identified exactly the problems with my actions and now I’m going to explain it as if I’m in a therapy session” that kinda just feels stilted to me sometimes. Idk, I love the bad kids, but they really are just like mini adults

[soullessduck13]

I think one of my favourite things to think about is the bad kids are all different races and can speak different languages, and how that affects them/the people around them, and maybe I just like thinking about them switching to a different language or not being able to fully speak one language when tired etc

Idk how it is for people who have grown up in one place but spoken a different language at home, at least not fully, but I do know what it’s like learning a different language at a young age and then befriending and talking to people who speak it as their native language.

Long post

Riz and Adaine are the most interesting to me, because I think Goblin is such a complex and different language compared to most others, it includes a lot of hissing, grunts, growls, ear movement and facial expressions and I think that it was the only language Riz knew until he started school, and he quickly picked up on common because Pok and Sklonda started speaking it with him too, I think it’s easier for goblin children to let out garbled noises than form full sentences and I don’t know if this makes sense but just hear me out.

Then obviously, Riz speaks more common than anything else, but during spring break Sophomore Year he hisses instead of telling someone to fuck off and it was much easier, basically meant the same thing to it’s just that no one understood, and then in Junior Year whenever he’s annoyed, stressed, etc etc he just hisses and growls and glares and I think the others tried to learn but it’s a complex language!! It’s very difficult to learn the difference between one hiss and another one.

ADAINE!! She has an accent (british) and had a hard time learning Common, not because it was hard to learn but because her family wouldn’t let her? She had tutors from Fallinel growing up and then around 8-9 she started learning common but didn’t get any real practice until around 11, the accent is noticeable when she talks but it’s not something anyone points out. She also loses her words a lot? Confuses how to word sentences exactly because it’s different in Elvish, mixes up different sayings, forgets words entirely too (me core). Sometime during Freshman Year she starts speaking exclusively Common with her family and now she only really speaks Elvish during combat and Aelwyn/sometimes Fig.

Fabian can’t speak Elvish, but he can understand it. Hallariel was most of time too drunk to properly teach him, but I imagine Cathilda tried and Bill would sometimes mention something to Hallariel in Elvish, it’s very like,, “Yeah I can understand all of it, but I can’t speak it fluently” and I think he wants to try after getting more connected to his mother’s side of the family.

Fig spoke Elvish growing up, but she started going to Daycare pretty early and speaks Common just as fluently as anyone else, but she slips into it whenever talking to her mom or Gilear. At least before the horns grew in, after that she stopped speaking Elvish as a form of rebellion, but she picked it back up in Sophomore year. I think she’s the least likely to confuse words and she often helps Adaine with words in Common whenever she loses them.

Gorgug cannot speak orcish, he can barely understand it. But he can speak Gnomish and it has surprised people more times than he can count. Again, he can’t fully speak Gnomish, mostly bc Digby and Wilma spoke Common with him growing up, but I think he can read it because a lot of their instructions and books are in Gnomish so he just learned how to recognise letters and words and string them together into sentences. Digby and Wilma stopped speaking Gnomish bc they cut the rest of their family off to protect Gorgug btw

Kristen can only speak Common and before going to Aguefort she was upset about it because she couldn’t preach to the people who could not understand, now she’s upset because she can’t properly gossip with her friends.

[silantryoo]

BONUS [ LIKEALOOK ] — jimin's y/n l/n.

yoo jimin, third year.

WARNINGS ; gaslighting, manipulation, anger issues, self-inflicted injury, self-harm, overworking, cheating, divorce, blood, violence, diets, verbal abuse(?) (3.1k)

yoo jimin hated the game she grew up loving.

at the ripe age of six years old, jimin had found herself playing in her backyard with her mom's deflated white and blue mikasa volleyball, the skin on it peeling and tearing from the years of wear prior to her use. though she loved the sting of the impact and the little dots on her forearms that would appear, there was nothing that could compare to the delight of her mother and father watching her from the house.

warmth, love, safety.

it was all jimin could feel back then, despite her arms aching and her lungs burning. the sweat on her back was nothing but a side effect of making them proud. the aching joints, the bruised arms, it didn't matter. all that mattered was them.

but to her father, all that mattered was pleasure, and in her twentieth year of life, everything would come spilling out like the lava from an active volcano.

jimin hated volleyball.

jang wonyoung smiled at the older girl, and jimin couldn't help but find it endearing.

she knew that the freshman (who was clearly younger than the rest of the other freshmen) idolized her. she had noticed it during tryout when she entered the gym doors, yeji's glare heavy on her. though all of the younger kids adored her, despite the year prior of her total silence, wonyoung seemed to shine through the crowd, diligent in a way that no one in her thirteen years of playing seemed to have.

the small looks of approval whenever she hit a particularly good spike, or the way she would listen to every syllable that jimin said pulled on the older girl's heartstrings. it was cute, and it gave her a sense of security that she often lacked when playing.

jimin was glad she convinced yeji to let the taller girl onto the team.

"sunbaenim!" wonyoung ran up to her, a tired smile on her face. "are you ready for the game tomorrow?"

yonsei was their biggest rival, as the two universities were always down each other's necks, waiting for one fatal mistake so they can swoop in and take the victory.

"maybe." jimin teased, her eyes dancing with a playfulness that she only managed to muster in front of her (not-so)mini-me. "it doesn't matter, as long as you're ready."

wonyoung whined, the younger not seeing through jimin's words.

"i'm joking." jimin patted the then shorter girl's shoulder. "i'm ready. don't worry."

wonyoung nodded, beaming up at the taller girl before scurrying off to talk to shin ryujin, hwang yeji's right-hand woman.

"you shouldn't be so nice to her."

the presence of hwang yeji was like an automatic surge of dopamine for jimin, and this wasn't any different.

"she's a kid." jimin tried to defend the girl, sensing the unwavering glare from her captain. "and she still has that drive, y'know?"

"only shit players don't have that drive." yeji looked at her as if the senior was talking about her. jimin pretending not to notice (even if her heart tore a little bit more). "she might take your spot in the future."

jimin smiled, watching as wonyoung made her way over to yujin, the latter throwing an arm around the skinny girl.

"i hope so." jimin spoke in happiness, ignoring the small ugly feeling in the middle of her chest. "she's a good player."

but yeji always had a way of knowing people's emotions before they knew it themselves.

"better than you?"

("is she better than us, dad?")

jimin looked at her captain, and all yeji returned was a smirk.

she loved hwang yeji, even if the girl reminded her of everything wrong in her life.

her mom would come into her room sometimes, crying about how her father had replaced them for a better, richer family. a chaebol of samsung who had left her husband for a nobody from a tech company, one who had a wife cooking and cleaning for him every day. a woman who would stay at home, who gave up her career to serve him and only him.

jimin's mom cried harder, apologizing for not being good enough, rich enough, to make her father stay.

it wasn't her fault, jimin knew it was her own.

maybe if she studied harder, suma would've given her a higher sum for her scholarship, taking the stress off the sole provider of the yoo household. if she had run a little faster, hit a little harder, and jumped a little higher, she would've been the outside hitter instead of hwang "free fall" yeji, instead of being the middle blocker who was too short to get her head above the net.

maybe, just maybe, her father would've been proud enough to stay. maybe her father would've loved her enough to love her mom, even if it was just for a little longer.

but jimin couldn't fly, and that was her biggest problem.

"jump higher."

jimin shook her head. it hurt.

"i can't."

jimin couldn't breathe, the pain with every impact making her legs beneath her crumble under her weight. her knee should be fine now, it shouldn't hurt.

why couldn't it stop hurting?

"jump. higher."

"i told you." jimin sobbed, hands on her knees. the pain was excruciating, like staring straight into the sun. "i can't."

"what the fuck am i even helping you for?" yeji mocked her, her voice echoing throughout the empty gymnasium. the volleyball captain leaned against the pole. "because if we lose, i swear i'll blame it on your shitty ass."

"we're not going to lose." jimin shook her head. it was impossible. never in history had they lost an opening game, and she wasn't going to start now. "look, i just need a break. my knee-"

"i don't care." yeji needed jimin's body, not her. "who gives a fuck about your knee? i'm trying to win."

hwang yeji was two things; methodical and manipulative, and her training jimin (which consisted of half of their 'sessions') was the former. she wasn't going to waste her precious time on a washed-out athlete, even if it was a great source of entertainment.

"yeji, please." jimin begged the way she did to her father. "i'm tired."

she was tired of hurting. she was tired of being the second choice, of not being good enough. she was tired of not recovering fast enough, being too weak, being too pretty, being everything but nothing.

jimin could see her vision blurring, the tears dripping down onto the court as the entire right side of her body burned with overuse.

yeji rolled her eyes, looking at the girl and walked up to her. putting a soft arm around jimin's waist, the cat-like girl leaned down. jimin's face was almost comical to yeji, and it took everything in her to not burst out laughing.

"don't you want this?" yeji asked, jimin's spine-tingling from the softness of her voice. warmth, love, safety. "baby, don't you want to make me happy?"

yeji already knew the answer.

"i know." jimin blinked her tears away, yeji pulling away to wipe her tears. "i'm sorry."

"just try again." yeji tried to hide the disgust as she felt the damp tears on her thumb. she pulled back. "jump higher this time."

jimin nodded.

ignore the pain. she thought. jump.

"i'll try."

jimin backed up from the attack line, the pain in her knee grinding her bones into mush. she ignored it, she had to. she couldn't worry about something so minuscule, not when yeji was expecting the most out of her.

all that mattered was yeji. she needed to make her proud.

jimin ran up to the net, jumping with all the power she could muster. she felt herself floating, like an astronaut up in space, waving down at the earth, or an angel, smiling down at their loved ones to watch over them.

her eyes didn't meet the top of the net.

she landed, her knee buckling under her once more, causing her to fall forward towards the center line. she could feel her ankle nearly twist onto itself, but nothing happened this time.

it hurt. it hurt so damn much.

"if i knew you couldn't do it, i should've convinced coach bam to put wonyoung starting." yeji shook her head, her eyes boring into jimin's.

jimin was pathetic, and yeji wondered if she had chosen the wrong girl in the first place.

jimin shook her head. she need this. yeji needed this.

"i can do it."

yeji scoffed, and it was like watching her father pack in the middle of the night, begging her to not tell her mom until he was gone.

"you can't." yeji stated. "why didn't you just quit last year?"

"i-" jimin knew the answer, and it was because of everyone but herself. they needed her to win, to play, to represent them. she was their pawn, and jimin never learned how to live for herself.

she glared at the ground, an unfamiliar rage burning inside of her. why couldn't she just be better?

she just needed to be better, for once.

"i'll do it this time." jimin stood up, clenching her fist. "i'm sorry."

"good." yeji nodded, watching the fire in jimin's eyes. she held back a smile, the glaring difference making the captain satisfied. "now again."

training finished in record time, but the sea of self-hatred never diminished in yoo jimin.

they were losing.

yonsei was a set ahead of them, 2-1, and jimin couldn't block a single spike from any of them.

her arms were tired from the day before. she couldn't jump high enough, and her knee... she couldn't ignore it any longer. the usual dull ache that she woke up with turned into a severe pounding, blood rushing to her head as she tried to persevere through it.

jimin hated it. she hated herself.

the whistle blew, and jimin looked over to the sidelines, ignoring the expressionless yeji, and the worried ryujin. she walked closer as wonyoung walked past her, and for the first time, jimin was irritated to see the young freshman do better than her.

that shouldn't have happened. she should've stayed. she should've done better.

"sit."

"coach, my knee." jimin bit her tongue. she couldn't cry, whether that be anger, pain or disappointment. "it hurts."

her coach looked at her, leaning down as the other girls on the bench cheered them on.

"does it look like i care?" coach bam looked pissed, squatting down. "look at me."

jimin's eyes locked onto the older man's eyes, his eye brows furrowed with a line in the middle. his faint 5 o'clock surrounded the frown on his mouth, and she could tell his neck was red and tense from yelling at her throughout the game.

"do you understand that you're are costing your teammates everything right now?" coach bam started, clenching his eyes shut. jimin swallowed back her reply. "you should know better than to be the reason we're losing this game. you need to get your head out of your ass and stop acting like you're special."

she knew that. jimin didn't need a reminder of what she wasn't. she already had a mental list of everything wrong with her, and she would survey it every morning an hour before practice.

"you know who's special?" jimin took a deep breath, zoning out as she waited for her coach to stop. "yeji. and you're ruining her chances of getting into the national team."

yeji was the center of the team, and anyone would be stupid to think otherwise.

"yoo!" coach bam shouted, making her flinch. "do you understand me?"

"yes."

he stood up, looking down at her like she meant nothing. "you're lucky wonyoung's around."

jang wonyoung was everything jimin lacked.

jimin hated it.

"ji..." alex whispered, passing her an ice pack for her knee. "are you okay?"

jimin could feel the tears starting to come. it was angry and hot, and it disguised the disappointment she felt.

"focus on the game," jimin could feel the anger building in her chest. "not me."

alex looked at her for a moment.

jimin was never an angry person, not even when they went to high school.

this wasn't jimin.

"but-"

"focus on the fucking game, alexandra."

yoo jimin played fifty minutes out of the two-hour game, all of which took place before the third set.

suma won with the help of jang wonyoung, ahn yujin and oh haewon.

3-2, in favor of suma.

yoo jimin was scared of many things.

she was scared of thunder, her house shaking as she ran to her parents' room. the thought of her death one day made her sick to the stomach, and there was something so unsettling about the thought of lake water to her.

losing yeji was another fear.

and losing her father was one she had realized recently.

"baby, i'm sorry." jimin begged, the hallway empty as most of the girls were in the multi-purpose room celebrating. "baby, please."

jimin grabbed yeji's arm, and the girl yanked her arm away, making the taller girl stumble forwards.

"who are you calling baby?" yeji asked her, her eyes cold and unfeeling. jimin hated when yeji was like this. "we aren't together, especially after that."

jimin could feel her stomach sinking. yeji was so far, and it was all her fault.

everything was her fault.

"my knee, i couldn't-" yeji began to walk away, and jimin lunged for her, her knee screaming at her to be careful. "yeji, please. i'm sorry."

yeji looked at her once more.

"be better." yeji pried jimin's hand off of her. "then we can talk."

"i'm trying." jimin could feel the tears starting to well up inside her. she was tired, and it seemed like yeji didn't care. "please."

yeji walked away without a word, leaving the sobbing jimin alone in what was dubbed suma's 'victor hallway'. the awards mocked her, her smiling face gleaming as if she wasn't currently drowning in self-pity.

she couldn't do this anymore. she couldn't think, her thoughts filtered with something akin to a red filter, skewing her perception in a way she had never felt before. all she felt was a hot burning rage that filled her to the brim with something so volatile.

jimin punched the cement wall, shaking the trophy case next to it.

she didn't care that her wrist wouldn't work the same tomorrow, or that her hand would sting with every contact with the ball. she knew her perfectly manicured hand would be bruised, and her knuckles would have the same fate, if not worse.

she didn't care.

she needed release, she needed to feel something aside from all the sadness, she needed something else, anything else.

jimin didn't know how many times she swung, but she knew it was enough to feel the shock through her shoulder and into her back, and for sores to open at the tip of her knuckles.

jimin sighed, sliding down the now red-stained wall. she would never hurt anyone, but she hated herself enough to hurt herself.

she wondered what would happen if she broke her wrist right there.

the volleyball player heard a small cough, accompanied by the rustling of paper, ice and plastic. jimin's head snapped to the sound, and she could feel the tips of her ears burn red.

"sorry, i was, um," the girl said shyly, and jimin deduced she was most likely a freshman. she was holding an ice pack, looking at the hunched-over volleyball player. "here."

jimin looked at it for a second, scanning the cat-like girl in front of her.

she was pretty, almost like a movie star. she had a beauty mark, though faint, on the tip of her nose, and her cheeks seemed to reflect her nervous fidgeting. her eyes glistened, a sense of innocence that many of the newbies held on her team.

"thank you." jimin smiled, the burning on her hand dying down at the contact of the ice.

the girl hummed, sliding down beside her, jimin's volleyball bag the only keeping the two apart.

jimin glanced at the girl once more. she looked at her, and jimin only felt warmth. she felt safe, like she was surrounded by the yellow-tinted lights of her house, her parents hovering smothering her with affection and love.

but jimin felt sincerity, a sense of truthfulness, and part of her had forgotten that existed until now.

"you're yoo jimin right?" the girl asked, looking at jimin's bloodied hand. she looked down at jimin's knee pads, almost like she was trying to decipher a code. "is it your left knee, or your right knee?"

when was the last time someone asked that? jimin wondered.

"sorry?"

"the ice." the pretty girl hummed, and jimin felt butterflies in her stomach. "use it on your bad knee after."

"oh, right." jimin forgot that there were many people who idolized her, too busy drowning in her self-hatred. "thank you."

the girl nodded, rummaging through her bag. jimin swore she saw a pair of slides in there, similar to the ones wonyoung had worn when she had arrived before the game.

"i have some chocolate if you want." the girl pulled out a ghana milk chocolate bar. jimin hadn't had once since she and her father decided it would be best to put her on a meal plan.

it had been about ten years since she had seen the familiar package.

"i can't eat chocolate." jimin smiled, the blood from her hands no longer seeping out of her hand.

"i won't tell." the girl brushed her hair out of her face, handing jimin the candy bar at her. "it'll be our secret."

("i can't keep secrets, dad!")

"i'm not good at secrets." jimin muttered.

"really? you seem like the type to be." the girl said, scratching her cheek as she zipped up her bag. "well, then i'll keep the secret for the both of us."

jimin nodded, looking at the girl as she checked her phone. the bright light framed her face in a way jimin had never seen before.

the girl's phone dinged, and jimin watched as she picked it up at lightning speed. the girl's face perked up, and jimin swore she had never seen anything cuter until then.

"i have to go. um," the girl stood up, bowing at the tear-stained volleyball player in front of her. "please take care of your knee. i hope that next time i can see you play."

jimin smiled, her chest light.

"i will... um-"

"l/n y/n." the girl smiled, her eyes forming into crescents. "i'm wonyoung's girlfriend."

wonyoung always had the best things in her life, jimin thought.

life was unfair.

"nice to meet you, y/n."

masterlist | next

taglist (CLOSED)!!

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[uselesssomebody]

𝕗𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕥𝕙 𝕠𝕗 𝕛𝕦𝕝𝕪 (𝕝) - neighbor!joel miller x reader (pre!outbreak)

complete masterlist | joel miller masterlist

"𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕥𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖 𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕗𝕠𝕦𝕣𝕥𝕙 𝕠𝕗 𝕛𝕦𝕝𝕪 𝕞𝕒𝕝𝕥 𝕝𝕚𝕢𝕦𝕠𝕣 𝕠𝕟 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕓𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕥𝕙, 𝕞𝕪, 𝕞𝕪" - you can be the boss | lana del rey

words || 𝟠.𝟛𝕜

summary || in which the reader gets real friendly with one of her neighbors

next part || fourth of july (II)

a/n || in honor of that one deleted dvcree edit. may it rest in peace ➵ i became ghastly ill when i tried to write so apologies that it took a while. ➵ this is set before the events of the show, back when joel and sarah were still both alive and in austin, texas. i've never been so i dunno how accurate my descriptions are, or my accents, either. don't hate them please ➵ there is an age gap in this story !! if that makes you uncomfortable, i have many other non-age-gap fics you can browse on my page. reader is like 27 and joel is like 36. he's not old, though he is mentioned as such because he's old compared to her. also canonical dilf ➵ thinking of putting out a sister blog but with darker fics? what're we thinking, guys? ➵ send me requests if you have ‘em. enjoy!

warnings || fluff/smut ➵ unprotected sex ➵ piv sex ➵ oral (m receiving) ➵ fingering ➵ overstimulation ➵ facial & cum ig (tell me if i miss anything)

austin was hot.

she was sure that was one of her first thoughts as she’d stepped off the plane, quick to push her suddenly-heavy locks out of her face. lugging luggage and a young teen with her certainly didn’t make it better, but the light gust of fresh air when she stepped out of the airport left her sighing deeply in relief.

flagging down a taxi was simple enough, but getting her sister to help place their suitcases in the trunk was not.

“nicole - please get off your ass and help me!” she said it in such a sweet voice, that her harsh choice of words seemed to both mildly bewilder and amuse the driver.

no one called nicole ‘nicole’, except, of course, her big sister - and even then, only to frighten her. to everyone else she was just nicky and, if they were real close, nick.

swallowing sharply at the implied warning - the use of her full name - she did, indeed, get off her ass and help push the last suitcase into the trunk.

they piled into the backseat, the cool of the a.c. soothing the light flush on the sisters’ skin. she’s quick to give the driver the address, and he nods, setting off.

neither of them had imagined ever moving back to austin, but here they were.

it’d been about 13 years, as far as she remembers, and the scenery had changed significantly. more people bustled around the streets than there had been before, more businesses had seemingly popped up, and everything seemed fancier.

nicky wouldn’t have noticed the change, having moved alongside her family at the ripe age of a year old, but her significantly older sister could.

she still remembers how her parents had sat her down - on a pretty summer evening before her freshman year. they’d mentioned many things - how the family was due for a new start, how austin wasn’t so feasible for them anymore, and so on. the only thing she’d heard was change and loss.

and that's what it was for her. her whole life turned upside on its head, as the family of 4 made the move across the country to the cold state of michigan. and that’s where they’d stayed - for the rest of her childhood, and then her adulthood, too.

her parents had been young when they’d had her. very young, and she sometimes sensed the sadness that she caused them because of it. they never tried to be outward about it, and her life had been as happy as she could have realistically wanted it.

and, though she loved her young sister, she knew that she became less important in the eyes of her parents after nicky’s birth, taking the back-burner to make space for the family’s golden child, conceived with careful planning and meticulous care - as opposed to the case that she’d been.

now, though, being much older, she didn’t let that bother her, though she never felt particularly at home in michigan. in fact, the last place she’d felt at ease had been austin, and when her father had stated that he couldn’t continue to find renters for their old property there, and was thinking of selling it, she was quick to discourage him, swaying him by stating she’d be more than happy to stay there, renting under her parents. they’d been excited at the notion of being able to keep the house, she was happy to get out of there, and nicky was… well, she was, frankly, devastated at the thought of her big sister being several states away.

regardless of the tense family dynamic, the both of them had remained steadfastly bonded, with her providing the role of a caretaker as much as she was a sister to nicky when her parents found themselves unable to relate to or understand their young daughter. nicky’d begged for weeks to travel with her sister, and her parents had been - to put it lightly - hesitant, worried that the big change would affect their daughter’s development.

nicky was outgoing, for sure, and she had her friends and her school - but she knew all those came and went. the only rock she’d truly had in her life was her sister, and the notion of losing her had been too much to bear.

she’d gotten ill after that first week it was announced - it was as much a physical sickness as it was a psychological one - and the wallowing she had done at the advent of the news had only spurred the sickness to be harsher.

her parents had had to reprioritize after that, finally grasping the profound effect the separation might have on the two.

and that’s what led them here - just a few blocks away from her childhood home.

nicky wasn’t sure how exactly she felt about the suburban environment after their last few years in an apartment at the heart of the city, but when she looked over, she could see her sister’s happy - nay, giddy - face. that was definitely a big plus.

she had practically fallen out of the car in her excitement, and she spent just a minute marvelling at the fact that building hasn't changed a bit from when she last saw it.

it had transported her back to her teenage self, and, lost in the moment, the taxi driver wondered if he should remind her of her bags and his fare. nicky, who had been less of a help on the ride here, started unloading them herself, and it took until the second suitcase for him to help her.

“just give her a minute,” she mumbles, making him laugh lightly. hearing the conversation, she snaps her head back, realizing that most of the bags were already on the pavement.

“oh! sorry,” she fished into her wallet, producing his fare, which he accepted with a nod and salute. she smiled, the two sisters thanking him and waving him off, before turning back to their place, “excited?” she mumbles it to nicky.

“incredibly,” she said it with a faux-bored expression, but even she could appreciate the extra space this house would provide them.

she walks up the patio steps, slotting the key she’d so delicately carried the entire journey here into the lock, and hearing the distinct click it made when it opened.

the sound of a new beginning.

it'd been a few weeks, and everything was shockingly alright. the house felt more like home to her than anywhere she'd ever been, and though nicky was still adjusting, she felt infinitely better in a somewhat unfamiliar environment with her sister, as opposed to a familiar one without her. the house had three bedrooms, and nicky’d happened to pick her childhood bedroom out of the two offered to her, and, though nicky hadn't realized yet, she could see the love she’d put into the bedroom when she was younger: chipped wallpaper where she’d put her posters, a faint ring of liquid on the windowsill from where she'd kept her potted plant, the creak of the bed whenever someone would sit on it.

hey, she never said it was perfect, and they'd been quick to make their way to the furniture store closer to the city to find some new things for the place. all she was glad about was that there was no need for renovations in the old house.

they'd found a lot of time to spend together; having moved early into the summer, they'd hoped nicky would get acquainted with the change before going to school. that’d also left her to be a somewhat bored teen, so she did what she, as a younger sibling, did best: annoy her sister.

of course, she didn't mind, simply happy they had a chance to hang out, something that had been harder to do for her between work back in michigan, and her school. currently, she was also taking a break, having left her job, and having a new one lined up in another month.

that left ample time for them to catch up on all the movies and t.v. they'd had to watch, and for the older sister to teach nicky a thing or two about good music. she couldn't have her sister entering high school with a bad taste of music - it'd be blasphemous. she'd been brushing up on her housekeeping abilities as well, so the time also consisted of teaching nicky of how to cook, and keep everything in the house in order to minimize the risk of damage.

that time had begun to dwindle as of recent, with nicky being out of the house more often. she'd come into her sister's room sporadically, in order to ask her permission to meet with a friend. she'd tend to say yes, considering her sister was old enough to handle herself, though she was always a little shocked at the speed at which nicky made friends.

on one fine morning, she finally sat her down.

“so, who's this friend you've been spending all your time with?” it'd been in the middle of breakfast, and nicky'd become frozen, spoonful of cereal sticking out of her mouth. she’s quick to realize the awkward position, pulling the spoon out of her mouth, and hastening her chewing in order to answer the question more quickly.

“you haven't met her? oh my god, you absolutely have to. she's been showing me around the place - apparently she knows all the coolest spots, cause her and her dad - they've been living here for, like, forever, and-” the sudden onslaught of information made the older sister practically recoil, before it was replaced by an amused chuckle.

“well, mom and dad were worried about how well you'd adjust, but it seems like you're doing just fine.” nicky smiled too, though it was a little sheepish, “so, where did you say she stayed?” she was still slightly confused as to how nicky had met her, as she'd never exactly strayed very far from the house.

“oh, she lives next-door. didn't I mention?” the information was jarring for a moment, as it seemed a massive oversight on her part to not even notice her adjacent neighbors, but she suddenly found herself remembering something. there had been a young girl coming out of the house next door with a bag slung over her shoulder, and her hair pulled back and under a visor to protect her from the blinding texan sun. she’d been out to attend to some of the plants she had bought for the porch, and she had looked up when she’d heard the girl’s crunching steps on the somewhat gravelly pavement.

she’d smiled and waved at her, and she’d nodded back, just slightly confused by the encounter. of course, due to the nature of it, she’d promptly forgotten about it by evening, but she was quickly coming to realize that this must be the girl that nicky was talking about.

“wait - she’s the one with the big hair, wears band shirts?” nicky nods enthusiastically, and she smiles approvingly. the young girl seemed sweet enough, and she was more than happy that nicky had already found a friend.

the next week, nicky had been begging that they invite sarah over for dinner. it’d been a chill weekend anyways, so she was definitely not opposed to the idea, but she was quick to extend the invitation.

“okay, okay - invite her over on sunday. tell her to invite her parents too; it’d be nice to meet the neighbors.” nicky was quick to shake her head.

“parent, it’s just her and her dad.” she corrected herself quickly.

“right, ��f course. invite him over too, then.” nicky nodded excitedly, rushing over to her room to get on the phone with sarah along the street.

that sunday, she did join the sister’s for dinner, but, as she’d been ushered into the house by two friendly smiles, she seemed to putting off a phrase at the tip of her tongue.

“s’everything ‘lright, hun?” she was quick to notice her guest’s guarded appearance, as she’d sat on the couch with nicky.

“hmm? oh, yeah, yeah. it’s just - my dad’s working tonight, so he couldn’t make it.” she waved her off.

“oh, don’t worry about that, we’re just happy you’re here!”

nicky echoed the sentiment, and the two young girls spent their time talking and laughing, a couple miscellaneous snack bowls spread over the coffee table as sarah became more comfortable. they’d migrated to the dining table when they’d been served dinner. she didn’t tend to cook for guests, so she attempted to pull out all her makeshift stops and, considering the end product, she was quite satisfied with the result.

no one was more excited than nicky and sarah, though - the both of them practically scarfing down the delicious meal. the conversation had turned to include all three of them, and sarah was beginning to reacquaint the both of them to austin, while they entertained her with stories of their time in michigan.

though they’d tried their very best, neither girl came all that close to finishing all the food she’d set out, so she was quick to package it up, sending sarah on her way with the food as a nod to her father’s missed opportunity.

“are you sure? i mean, i don’t know if i can take this-”

“yes, you can. unless you don’t think he’ll like it-”

“no! absolutely not, he’ll love it, it’s just-”

“sarah.” the faux-strict tone made sarah’s face crack into a smile, before she nodded, tucking the packet under her arm as she turned to say her goodbyes to nicky.

once she’d left, she pounced on her older sister.

“isn’t she great?” startled, she laughed, before nodding.

“definitely.”

june passed quickly, and, by july, she’d finished the paperwork for the house, for her job, and for nicky’s school. she was glad to know that it was the same one that sarah went to, and, with the added comfort of her sister spending increasing amounts of time exploring austin, she’d sat her cramped joints down in front of the t.v., vying at the chance to enjoy some trashy reality or game show.

though the sun still provided sweltering heat, when she left the kitchen and living room windows slightly ajar, she could feel the hint of a breeze work in place of their energy-consuming a.c. - which she’d turned off for that exact reason.

she turned her head from the t.v., the contestants on the screen continuing to speak with the host, and she let her eyes drift over the sliver of scenery that she could see through the half-obstructed kitchen windows. some of her neighbors had put up american flags. some were old, new, tattered, printed, there was even one that seemed to be homemade. of course, she knew this behavior was really only reserved in this neighborhood during this time of year, as the texans prepared to celebrate the 4th of july.

reminiscing of her own experiences with the holiday: going swimming with friends, eating good meals, and the occasional barbecue at a friend’s place - she was caught off guard when she heard the doorbell ring. it made her jump, but she quickly composed herself, standing up and brushing off her clothes.

she ran her fingers through her hair and, hoping she looked presentable, she opened the door.

it was her neighbor on her other side, a woman by the name of martha. she was a little older - her and her husband - and they were absolute sweethearts. in fact, they were the first to greet the new neighbors, back on their second day here. she was looking up at her with an excited smile.

“martha, hi! what can i do for you!”

“well - i was just wondering if you’d join us: we’re having a little barbecue tomorrow for the 4th, and i’ve invited a few of the neighbors. we’d really love to have you and nicky.”

she was just a bit taken aback by the invitation, but she didn’t hesitate in her response.

“of course, we’d be happy to be there! shall i bring anything?”

“no, of course not, dear. we’re hosting, just bring your little one.” she let out a light laugh, agreeing. martha bid her a quick goodbye, and headed in the next house’s direction - the millers.

perfect, she thought, nicky’ll have some fun too, then.

july the 4th, and a neighborhood barbecue. it’s a nation-wide phenomenon, then.

nicky’d been significantly more excited than her, once again, proving herself to be the more social one. nevertheless, as the younger girl got ready the next morning, her older sister spent her time finishing a tin of muffins. martha’d assured her she didn’t have to bring anything, but it almost hurt her soul to show up empty-handed. if she’d calculated correctly - and she’d hoped she’d done - she’d made just about enough for the whole group.

by 11:30, they were both ready, and she’d placed two boxes of them in nicky’s hand, while she carried the other two. the both of them made their way over, and she noticed the large group mingling in their yard and backyard. she could see martha’s husband, john, commandeering their large grill, a corona in his hand. she looked around for martha, and caught the eye of the woman as she turned away from greeting another guest.

“oh, you two ‘re here, perfect.”

“hey, martha. look, i know what you said, but-” martha gasped in delight at the boxes as she neared and noticed them, lightly taking them off of her.

“they look great; you haven’t stressed making them, have ya?”

“no - no, it’s my pleasure, really.” martha smiled at her, a mix of graciousness and happiness, before turning her attention to nicky.

“hey, nicky. how’re ya holding up?” nicky nodded.

“good, pretty good. thanks for having us.” she waved her hand at the notion, ushering the both of them inside.

for the first hour, she got acquainted with martha’s husband, the smiths from across from them, and marriots from down the road. they were all very curious about michigan and she, in turn, curious about how much exactly austin had changed since she’d last been here. at the same time, nicky was talking to a pair of twins a year younger than her who lived about two houses down. they were pretty cool, and were going to the same school as her, so they were filling her in on some of the school-wide drama: stuff sarah never cared so much about.

speaking of which, by about 12:30, she hears sarah’s voice greeting someone, and she turns her head, waving at her. behind her is her father, two packs of cold ones in his hands, that he sets down as he greets the hosts. sarah’s quick to detach from him, saluting him goodbye, as she instead makes her way over to nicky and the two other girls.

nicky's older sister had been enraptured in a conversation about the new dog the marriots were getting next week, when she felt someone come up to her.

john had brought joel over to the group, and he integrated without interrupting the story, letting mr. marriot express his excitement for the miniature pinscher they were getting. once he was done, he notices the newest member of his audience.

“hey! joel, how’re ya doin’?” his words turned the attention of everyone in the group, and she realized that this was the coveted joel miller: the man she missed for that one dinner. she turned her head to look at him, flashing him a friendly smile, but it almost froze on her face as she drank in his appearance.

good god, was he fine. messy hair that he’d pushed back, a full beard and an intense gaze. jesus, he was piercing straight through her, his eyes boring into hers while his mouth reflected a polite smile. she averted her gaze for a moment, before john is quick to introduce them.

“and this is joel; him and his daughter live right next door to you guys.” she nods, reaching over to shake his outstretched hand.

“nice to meet you; you’re sarah’s dad?” he nods, smiling at the mention of his daughter. she made the mistake of looking up to catch his gaze, and she felt her breath hitch. the moment passed as she released his hand, but, when she looked back up at his face for a half-second, as ms. smith began talking about her daughter, she swore she saw a smirk in the corner of his mouth.

the lunch had been lovely, and the company had been better. she’d heard stories of four neighbor’s dogs, and seven neighbor’s kids, and then stories of john and martha’s holiday the previous winter, and she felt much closer to the entire neighborhood. nicky had been bustling between her and her friends the entire time, as had sarah, but with her father.

speaking of whom - joel was interesting. he seemed just a bit tired, and maybe bit quiet compared to the others, but he had managed to find a keen amusement in making her squirm. and how could she not? this attractive, sweet, hot, funny, hot, gentlemanly, hot single dad was meeting her eyes every few moments with a gaze that made it look like he wanted to make her forget her name.

did she mention he was hot?

as was she, after a few hours of this strange back and forth, where the both of them seemed to be enraptured in the conversations they were in, but couldn’t seem to take their attention off each other.

jesus christ - he’s your neighbor. and he’s 10 years older than you. and he’s got a daughter who is best friends with your sister!

she jumped when nicky had come up to her, shocked by the feeling of practically materializing her sister.

“hey, i was wondering if i could go over to sarah’s place? i’ll be home in the evening.” nicky seemed a little tired of the party, obviously not the absolute best scene for a teenager like her.

“huh? oh, um - is she and her dad okay with that?”

“i’m alright with it,” a deep voice came from behind her, and she whipped her head around. joel had a kind smile on his face, and he was looking over at nicky, nodding.

“oh, thank you mr. miller! i appreciate it.” nicky smiled back up at him, before looking at her sister with practically puppy eyes.

“alright, nicky. be home by 5.”

“by 6, see you!” nicky rushed off before she had a chance to argue, and she opened her mouth, stuck between bemusement and amusement at her gall. joel laughed behind her, a deep, quiet noise. she didn’t realize how close he was to her, feeling the vibrations of his body in her own. she turned to properly face him, taking a half-step back to allow herself a more comfortable angle to look at him.

“nicky’s always so excited to hang out with sarah, and i can see why: she’s really sweet.” he smiled at the compliment for his daughter, his eyes holding a far-away quality that indicated his reminiscing of her.

“yeah - yeah, nicky too. sarah’s always harpin’ me to be able to go out with her.” he took a breath as he snapped back to look at her, “you’re new to the neighborhood then.” she smiled.

“yeah, we just moved in last month.” he nodded, gesturing around.

“it’s not a bad place, when you’re used to it.” there’s a joking twang in his tone.

“it’s not a bad place, even when you aren’t.” a light chuckle fell from him, as he took another swig of his beer. she could feel the proximity heating her up, so she brushed some hair out of her face, “i think i’ll step out for a moment. d’ya wanna join me?” she gestured to the door, and he shrugged.

“why not.”

the yard was more empty now, as people had begun leaving the gathering, or entering the house as the food had dwindled. though, still placed on the table, were a few of the many muffins she had made. she walked over, him in invisible tow, and she took one, handing it over to him.

“do me a favor, tell me what you think.” he seemed a bit confused, but obliged her, eating the muffin with great care. maybe exaggerated, but the expression on his face made her laugh, so she didn’t mind.

“this is great! martha went all out for these.” she nodded at the praise, him oblivious that it should have been directed towards her.

“martha definitely did. those were mine, though.” he looked back at her, in a mixture of impress and awe.

“well - you’re as good a baker as you are a cook, then.” she laughed at the reference to their lost dinner.

“oh, you did get it from sarah. perfect, what’d you think?”

“i thought that i regretted missing the chance to meet you then.”

suddenly, she felt the conversation had veered away from her ability to make food, and more towards - well, her. she went to retort, but heard her phone’s tone go. she snapped her head to her pocket, mumbling an apology as she did so.

it wasn’t anything important, thankfully, but it did give her an opportunity to check the time and, true to belief, it seemed that, very soon, she’d have overstayed her welcome.

“shit, it’s later than i thought.” she looked up at him, almost apologetically.

“you’re heading home?” though she wasn’t a master at reading faces, she could almost swear there was a hint of disappointment on his.

“well, joel, you’re a hard man to get a hold of. so, mind helping me bring these boxes back?” she gestured to the four boxes, and, in her own roundabout manner, made the bold move of inviting him over.

was it even bold? he lived a few meters from the place anyway. he smiled though, and, in his own gentlemanly manner, agreed immediately. he grabbed three of the boxes before she could stop him, and she almost sheepishly took the last box back up the street with him, pausing for only a moment to unlock the door to hers, before ushering him into the place.

he seemed almost hesitant to step too far in, but she waved it off, telling him to make himself comfortable as he set the boxes down.

“want anything? water, beer? something to eat?” he held his hand up, shaking his head, but did indulge in sitting at her dinner table. she ignored his gesture, taking out two cans for the both of them, before sitting in the seat beside him. he didn’t seem to mind, though, taking the cold beverage gratefully. it made her smile: at least the heat was affecting the both of them.

she took a long, almost wincing sip of hers, having almost forgotten how strong the liquid tasted in her mouth.

“sarah mentioned you’re a contractor?” it was a feeble attempt at reigniting their conversation; truly, she just didn’t want him to leave yet. he seemed to notice that notion, as he took a moment to answer, looking up at her between sips.

“yeah, yeah. me and my brother.” it was new info, and she nodded, rubbing at her nose lightly as she concentrated on the tab of the can, “so, how’d you find the place - the people?”

“they’re - uh, they’re really nice, i guess. everyone seems really friendly.” he nods.

“sure, sure. i’m sure it’s a little annoying though - everyone’s a bit older, right?” she looked up at him, and he had an unreadable expression on his face.

“well, i don’t mind older.” she maintained eye contact as she saw his smile twist, lip curling into a smirk, one he tried to hide behind his drink, “in fact, i think it’s better. older guys tend to be more mature - put together, you know?”

“guys?” his face betrayed his shock at her directness, and she suppressed a laugh.

“well, that is what you’re asking, aren’t you?” he held a hand up in surrender.

“and if i was?” she stuck her tongue into the side of her cheek, surveying the space between them.

“well, mr. miller. i’d tell you to stop beating around the bush and just take what you want.” he set his drink down with a light thud, something more desperate swirling in his eyes.

“and what would that be?” he wanted her to iterate exactly what she thought would happen.

“you tell me.” she didn’t give in, hoping the older man would break before she would.

he didn’t need much convincing, though, placing a firm grip on her arm, and pulling her closer to him, leaning forward and taking her cheek in his much larger hand.

“you’re asking too much of me, sweetheart. what’d the neighbors think?” his breath fanned over her face, and the tone of his voice indicated his teasing nature.

“what?” he laughed against her, shaking her body, before he gestured to the window just adjacent to him.

“only been here a few weeks, and already seducing one of your neighbors? it’s bold - i’ll tell you that much.” his cologne - a soft, but distracting smell - was overpowering her, and she couldn’t exactly think clearly as he sat so close to her.

“joel.” it came out as more of a plea than she had maybe wished, and he smiled, his eyes flicking across her face, “should we go upstairs?” she detached from his eyes for just the slightest moment, to look up at the staircase leading to her room.

“if you want to, sweetheart.”

fuck. being called sweetheart? by him? she was done for.

she led him up the stairs, her steps just slightly shaky as she walked up.

what was she doing? him, she supposed.

her bedroom was messier than she’d hoped as they walked in, but she didn’t have time to dwell on that as he pulled her towards him while she shut the door behind her, pressing his lips to her ear as her back hits his thick chest.

“you sure you want to do this?” his voice is huskier than it had been before, and it made her let out a shaky breath.

“please.” he smiles against her soft skin, turning her to face him. she doesn’t waste a moment, leaning closer to his face as he pulled hers closer to him, capturing her lips in his own.

his beard tickled her chin, his breath warm on her face as she closed her eyes against him. he tasted like an interesting mix between the barbecue, her muffins, and the beer he’d been drinking, creating a festive, american aftertaste in her mouth.

the kiss made her moan against him, as her hands finally began exploring the man in front of her. his shirt was flimsy against his torso, and that made her almost more inclined to pull it off of him, as she placed her hands under the thin fabric. he broke the kiss with an amused exhale, pulling her hands out from under it with a smile playing on his lips.

“think you owe me something, first, sweetheart.” she looked back up at him in confusion, but, noticing the fingers at the ends of her own top, she as quick to pull it off of herself. even he seemed a little shocked by her eagerness, but that didn’t stop him, pulling her into him with such force that the both of them fell onto her bed.

he sat back up in a heartbeat, redirecting her thighs so that they straddled his own, pulling her towards him. the angle left her neck at eye level with him, and his nose traced the skin of her collarbone, the ghost of kisses leaving a trail up her neck as she wrapped her fingers in his scruffy hair. she let herself get lost in his touch, the softness of his lips on her chest, the sharp sting of his teeth occasionally grazing her skin, the harshness of his fingers against the skin of her thighs.

before she - or he, for that matter - could get too carried away, she pushed away from him lightly, reaching back down to tug at his shirt.

“you got what you wanted, now come on-” he laughed as he pulled the offending cloth off of him, and she sighed happily at the sight.

god, he was hot. she pushed him further back until he was laying down, and attached herself to his jaw, placing chaste kisses in a similar manner he’d done, tracing the edges on his beard with her lips. he kept his hands firmly on her sides, squeezing gently as she made her way down his body, over his chest, where the hair tickled her nose, making her smile. then, over his stomach, until she’d gotten dangerously close to his rapidly hardening cock.

he gripped her tightly, making her squeak in shock which, surprisingly, did nothing to quell his arousal.

“you’re-”

“let me, c’mon.” she said it as though there was a measure needed to persuade him. that definitely wasn’t the issue; rather he was worried he’d finish far too quickly for the mature older man he’d portrayed himself to be.

but how could he not - this fucking gorgeous woman with her head between his legs looking up at him with those eyes. fuck, those eyes.

“please, joel?” he’d grunted in that moment, releasing his grip, and she had a smug smile on her face as she unbuttoned his jeans. he couldn’t see it though, his head thrown back as he tried to even his breaths.

she wasted not a moment to tease him, tracing the outline of him lightly through the thin fabric of his boxers. he’d groaned her name - almost in warning, and she smiled as she relented, pulling him out from the confines of the cloth.

she hadn’t exactly been proud of her expression in that moment - akin to an actress on a certain screen, if you caught her drift - except hers wasn’t a fake one. older men had always been a hit or miss for her in terms of dick size, but this one seemed to be the fucking hit.

he’d recovered in time to catch that look, leaning on his forearm to be able to reach his hand over and push her hair out of your face.

“shocked, sweetheart?” she didn’t take her eyes off him.

“excited, more like.” she pulled her hand lightly up and down his cock, spitting in her hand before continuing. the added lubrication made him moan through his teeth, and she didn’t give him a moment of reprieve, readjusting so she was at the perfect angle to lightly lick his tip.

he practically shuddered at the contact of the wet muscle on him, a hand going to weave the hair falling over her face away, and gripping her head maybe tightly than he intended to, as she placed feather-light, open-mouthed kisses from the top to the bottom of his cock. he didn’t say anything, his appreciation for the act moreso communicated through the squeezing and releasing of her hair, and his shuddered breaths and quiet, almost broken moans.

deciding she didn’t want to wait any longer, she wrapped her lips completely around him, taking him deeper and practically feeling him twitch as she sunk lower on him. he guided her movements slightly with his grip on her, pushing her down as he let loose to the feeling, and pulling her up lightly as she came too close to unraveling him.

breathing in deeply through her nose, she pushed down further on him, swallowing to suppress her gag as she felt her nose being tickled by the hair at his base.

“fuck, sweetheart.” the curse left his mouth almost aggressively, as he twitched behind her lips. her throat constricted around him, and she resurfaced, breathing heavily to make up for the lost air. he looks down at her, taking in her cock-drunk appearance as she sighed between his thighs. she lazily pulled her hand up and down his cock, as she caught her breath, “come up here, baby.” through both of their pants, she made out his request, getting up so that she was sitting on her knees, as he also rose to rest better against the headboard. he gestured her to some closer, and she placed a knee of either side of him, practically crawling up his legs.

the shorts she was wearing were his biggest obstacle at the moment, and he was quick to pull her up by the front of them, unbuttoning them in the process. a squeak emitted from her, shocked by the manhandling, and he was quick to pull them down her legs. her hands cover his, the both of them almost desperately taking them off and, once he’d finally done so, he focused his eyes to hers, his fingers sliding up her thigh and to her cunt. he traced her lower lips lightly, and she could feel her thighs tense, her breathing hitching.

noticing her reaction, he smiles, pulling her lips to his, and kissing her as he traced up and down her slit, placing the ghost of pressure on her clit. she almost jumps at the sensation, but the firm grip his other hand keeps on her hip stops her.

“don’t run away now, sweetheart.” it’s a whisper into the space between them, and she wordlessly nods, her hand going to his biceps and gripping as he applied more pressure, “tell me what you want.” she looked up at him, a mix of disappointment and frustration at the request.

“i…”

“you?” she cleared her throat, averting her gaze, and he used his free hand to direct her chin to look at him, “what d’you want?”

“i want you to fuck me.” she felt almost ashamed saying it, but he smiled in pride - a smug smile.

“we’ll have to get you ready, first; don’t ya think?” he dips the tip of his finger into her and she shudders again, her hips jumping lightly, causing him to squeeze her. she nods, humming, too focused on the movements of him fingers to properly answer. taking pity on her, he obliges, pushing a finger into her, and curling it up.

“oh, god.” the sensation makes every muscle in her tense, the sexual frustration piquing at the feeling, and simultaneous lack thereof. her head falls into the space between them, and he places an almost comforting kiss to the top of her head, before beginning to move his finger.

initially, he moved it in and out of her almost exploratively, as if he was trying to determine what exactly made her tick. it resulted in soft moans and cut-off breaths, before he heard something akin to a whimper when he’d found a particular spot inside her.

he pushed another finger in, making her noises only grow, gripping him tighter. he started moving in and out of her at a more rapid rate, his fingers curling, to the point where she was moaning so loudly that he was worried the neighbors would hear regardless of their relocation.

he took his lips to hers again, hoping to muffle her noises, and it worked, her mouth focused on feverishly returning his passion that she managed to swallow the majority of her moans. though, it didn’t help when she felt the knot inside her begin to tighten, her hips grinding against his fingers.

“y’gonna cum, sweetheart?” she couldn’t speak, worried she’d be too loud if she opened her mouth, so she nodded frantically, pushing more quickly against him as she chased her high, “that’s it, baby, cum for me, cum for me-” his encouragement almost made it easier, and she did cum, in something akin to a burst: her body fully stilled, as did his movements, and her eyes rolled into the back of her head, the hint of a squeal leaving her parched mouth. her voice sounded almost broken because of the intensity of it, and she practically leaped off of his fingers, unable to take the overstimulation as he had begun to move again.

“sorry - fuck, it’s too much, sorry-” he shook his head, assuring her immediately.

“it’s fine, sweetheart, you’re fine. ‘re ya ‘kay?” his accent came out more aggressively as he checked on her. she’d placed her hands over her face in an attempt to cool its warm flush, trying to catch her breath, as she nodded shakily.

“i’m - i’m, fuck, yeah, i’m fine.” she practically stuttered through her gasps, and he found it endearing, giving her a moment to compose herself. he adjusted the way she sat on him for her to be more comfortable, him fingers kneading the flesh of her thigh gently, hoping the contact would ground her.

it worked, with her taking her hands off her face after a few moments. her eyes had a far-away look to them, but she had a sheepish smile on her face.

“that was - uh, it was really good.” he smiled at her reaction, but it dropped after a moment.

“we can - we can stop, if ya want, sweetheart. if it’s too much-”

“no!” her response was so aggressive that it made him look at her in light amusement, “i mean, no. i don’t want to stop.” he surveyed her with an analytical eye.

“are ya sure?”

“joel, please?” she’d moved closer so her cunt sat inches from his cock, her warmth radiating onto him.

“i-” he went to say something, but seeing her flushed skin, her lust-blown eyes and the plea to fuck him, he seceded.

he pulled her up by her thighs, so she hovered over his cock. she used her hand to hold it steady, before he helped her lower onto him. it took a try or two, with his cock bumping against her clit and making her jolt. his tip caught her entrance in just another moment, though, and she took in a deep breath as she sunk onto him.

“fuck-” his response made up for her wordless one, her face contorting in pleasure as she tried to handle the size of him in her.

“joel-” she needed a moment to adjust, and it seemed as though he’d realized even before her.

“take your time, sweetheart.” she took a deep breath, sinking into joel’s arms further as she felt his thumb over her clit, trying to make the process easier for her.

finally, she mustered the strength to grip onto his shoulders, his hand finding a firm place on her waist, as she strained the muscles in her thighs to lift herself up. she felt a moment of aching emptiness, before she sunk back down on him, his cock catching practically every sensitive spot inside of her, making her moan.

it was a bit laborious, but along with his own effort, they came to a working rhythm seamlessly, and her moans began to be matched by his grunts at the feeling of her warm cunt, enveloping and twitching around him. she felt fucking amazing, and the warm breath of her gasps spurred him to push against her with just that bit more force. her eyes widened, her moans breaking as her breath caught in her throat. she felt her muscles turn to jelly with each thrust, practically being held up just by his hands. her head falls against his shoulder, her breath stuttering. his pace didn’t relent, though, with him readjusting just slightly to do the brunt of the work, fucking up into her as she tried not to let the pleasure consume her.

“joel - joel, you’re, oh, fuck-” she became a mess of mumbles as she attempted to just take it, but she felt her second orgasm oncoming, and way too quickly.

“c’mon, c’mon-” even joel wasn’t really registering what he was saying, focusing on feeling her cunt pulse again, like it had around his fingers. she didn’t make him wait too long, as her mouth fell open and her body tensed, clamming up as her orgasm crashed over her. his name came out in a squeak, and he resisted the urge to moan too loudly by attaching his lips to her neck, taking in the feeling of her pulsating cunt.

she slumped against him, desperately trying to catch her breath, before she was reminded her was still inside her. he helped her off of him and, before he could do anything else, she kneeled back in front of him, positioning her face right in front of his cock and stroking him to completion, his warm cum falling over her face in ropes.

“jesus christ, sweetheart.” he had to physically turn away from her, worried he’d get hard again at the sight, and she let out a tired laugh at his reaction. she rose from the bed after a moment of catching her breath, turning into her bathroom in order to clean herself up. it only took a minute or two, and by the time she’d walked back, joel had managed to pull his jeans back over him, and was desperately searching for his shirt. it was just by her feet, and she could give it to him.

but did she want to?

both of their heads snapped up when they heard the sound of the front door opening.

nicky - she’d come back at her sister’s previously preferred time, 5, and that had become increasingly problematic.

“shit-” she threw his shirt at him, and he caught it with one hand, trying to adjust the button of his pants with the other, “what do we-?” she questioned, as she pulled her shorts over her legs and shirt over her own head.

“just say ya were showing me around?” he suggested, and, through a shaky breath, she nodded.

“smart - smart, uh, do we-?” she gestured to herself, hoping she looked presentable, and the both of them gave each other a once over in approval that neither looked too disheveled, before they opened the door.

of course, those post-orgasm should never be told to rationally judge anything, as nicky and sarah could tell something was off from practically the moment their family members stepped out of the room.

“nicky? you didn’t have to be back so early, you know.” she said it quickly, without thinking, and, upon seeing joel’s what the fuck? expression, she realized how bad it sounded. nicky had, too, her brows furrowing as she turned to sarah, who simply shrugged in similar confusion.

“i’m sorry?” she watched as her sister - and then, to her surprise, mr. miller - came down the stairs.

“that’s not what i meant.” her sister mumbled, a sheepish smile on her face.

“dad, what’re you doing here?” sarah looks at her father quizzically, and he opens his mouth to speak, as she does at the same time.

“just - showing me around-”

“i’m giving him a tour!” they spoke over each other, and she glanced to look at him in slight embarrassment. he was trying his absolute hardest to keep from chuckling.

“anyways, sarah, we should get going. you two have fun?” sarah still looked between the both of them inquisitively, as nicky bore a glare at her sister, as if asking a question telepathically.

“lots of fun, dad.” it’s got an awkward delivery, so he coughs in an attempt to dissuade the tension, turning to her once more.

“it was nice meeting you, then - the both of you.” he smiled at nicky as well, before reuniting with his daughter.

“of course! it was great to see you again, too, sarah.” she mentioned, as she opened the front door for the both of them.

“see you around, sarah. good evening, mr. miller.” nicky spoke from behind her, and the millers nodded in goodbye. the front door shut with a click behind them.

there was a moment of silence between her and nicky, as she leaned against the door, before nicky broke into a big smile.

“i can’t believe you did that.” panic flashed over her face, and she whipped her head to face nicky.

“huh?”

“he’s so much older than you. and my friend’s dad, c’mon!” she sounded annoyed, but the exaggerated nature indicated that it was fake. she immediately tried to deny her sister’s completely true assertion, but the younger girl practically laughed in her face. she rolled her eyes at the reaction, brushing her off.

“shut up, nicky. he’s not even that much older than me.”

only a few meters away, sarah was trying very hard to suppress her own laugh.

“she’s really nice, right, dad?” joel, who had a faraway look in his eyes, hummed in response, prompting her to continue, “nicky’s sister. she’s really nice.”

“yeah - yeah, she is.” joel shrugged, unsure of how exactly to respond to his daughter. he looked down at her, and she had this glint of mischievousness in her eyes.

it worried him.

as he ushered her in when he’d unlocked the door, she’d made a beeline for her room. though, before she made her way up the stairs, she turned back for a moment, looking at him.

“and dad? you’re shirt’s on backwards.” she doesn’t wait for his response, walking up the stairs. shocked, joel looks down at his shirt, where the tag was practically looking him in the face. he sighed, closing the door behind him.

“shit.”

[the-knight-of-destiny]

FHJY Episode 17 Spoilers Big big big meta trying to place the Nightmare King plot and Ankarna Conspiracy, Jace Stardiamond and Porter Cliffbreaker's places in it. Short version? I do not think these plans started intertwined.

So the Ratgrinders are getting their pre-existing anger spiked by Ankarna corruption, and Porter's motives have been very explicitly spelled out, but what is Jace getting out of this, why, and when did he start? This I feel is the point that cracks open how these plans eventually connected. I'm going to open by saying this isn't Jace apologism, because that'd be weird as hell, but it might look like it for a second. An important piece of the puzzle is he clearly died and was infected by a rage star same as the Ratgrinders at some point. Jace is noted/characterized as being very lax and chill in Freshman Year. He has not acted this way in all of his appearances in Junior Year. Now one may point to Jace and Porter in the cafeteria after the first combat in the series, but here's the thing. Porter WASN'T in on the plan of Kalvaxus. Near the end of Freshman Year he is one of the staff who is captured in a Palimpsest. But we do know someone was much closer to that plan, Jace Stardiamond. While Ragh's testimony about Porter and Jace has already been played, people forget that Jace was mentioned outside of just being with Porter. Ragh mentions seeing Jace AND ONLY Jace talking with Arianwen Abernant and a figure Ragh could not yet see (presumably Kalina), this is without Porter present, and as established Porter was actively targeted in the Kalvaxus plot.

We can safely assume two things from this, Jace was one of the only unaccounted for staff members at the time when the Nightmare King's crown disappeared, and he was seen talking with the people who later had it, so he's likely our culprit in swiping it from Arthur Aguefort's office. Also, Porter, while always plotting the Ankarna situation, was genuinely in the dark about Kalvaxus' plan. This leaves us with two questions. One we have pretty likely answers to, one we don't. Question 1. When did Jace die and get revived? He likely isn't acting entirely of his own will in the Ankarna plot, as evidenced by his red wound and heightened anger compared to previous appearances. This has a likely answer, he probably died at the same time as Kipperlilly Copperkettle, presumably in the Mountains of Chaos. I sincerely do not think this was planned, at least not by Jace though it could have been in some roundabout fashion. Question 2. When does Porter contract Kalina? We know he had been plotting Ankarna stuff for a long time, likely before he even met the Bad Kids. While it's technically possible he always knew about Kalina, I do not consider it likely. We know Kalina had a big hand in the Kalvaxus plot (she specifically worked with him to kill Pok Gukgak, and manipulate Aelwyn Abernant), but signs point to Porter not knowing about the Kalvaxus plot, he's explicitly taken out of the picture by Kalvaxus. But Porter later works with Kalina to attack Lydia Barkrock and infect Ragh Barkrock, pretty soon after. The only connection to the Kalina infection he explicitly has is his seeming friendship with Jace. I posit that Jace intentionally brought Porter into the fold. Soon after Kalvaxus' death. Jace can't object to the plan changing to Ankarna now, because he died and was resurrected by Ankarna and Porter sometime during Sophmore Year (most likely). (Side note, this implies Jace either gave Porter a blood transfusion or form of healing, implying his subclass is Divine Soul, or like, the two of them had sex at some point? This part of the timeline baffles me.)

[kayetra-spade-queen]

Danny Phantom

There's not much change in name, but I intend to use what the fandom come up for his middle name (at least I think that's what the fandom agreed on? I might be wrong).

Daniel James Fenton.

Daniel, his actual full first name.

James, is what I remembered the name the fandom agreed upon, or at least some of it.

Fenton, his family name. There's nothing for me to explain about.

Also, a friend pointed out that I have a habit of giving things dramatic names (I'd say the influence of Genshin is strong af-). I do have a habit of making something to be more extreme than it was when it was originally made, so please don't mind it.

Relationships:

Maddie and Jack:

They're still the goofy and quirky parents Danny and Jazz had, but was smarter, more understanding and compassionate compared to the original. Knew Danny turned into ghost and the portal incident, more like they were also witnesses of that said incident. The sound of his scream of agony and pain manage to pull out nightmares for the both of them on several nights. However, that doesn't waver their love for their son. Sure, he may become half of the being they're hunting down for the sake of studies or something, but that doesn't erase the fact that this ghost child is their child, their little baby who unfortunately fell into the abyss of their own mistakes and neglect. They assists Team Phantom many times when it comes to the supply and whatever knowledge they have currently and are still expanding beyond their current understanding for the sake of learning to find a solution that wouldn't harm either side of the plane.

Jazz:

Nothing much different compared to the canon, except she was also a witness to the incident. Her overprotectiveness tenfold, much to Danny's dismay, and it took a lot of time for them to find a common ground and for her to tone down. There's nothing much different in this version compared to the original.

Sam, Tucker:

Danny's friends since elementary. Their relationship is pretty much the same as they are in canon, but what's different is that Danny and Sam doesn't harbor feelings for one another (I apologize for those who ship Amethyst Ocean), and therefore they aren't in any other relationship other than best friends.

Valerie:

Danny's relationship with Valerie is very contradictive compared to their relationship in canon. First and foremost; Valerie listens to people more than just act out and shutting her ears out, yes she sometimes act out first questions later, but she had made pretty good judgements and know that nothing good happens when jumping to conclusions too quickly and taking everything at face value without knowing the full story. She and Danny became friends during freshman year of middle school, and although Valerie still somewhat in the 'popular' clique in their school, she'd prefer to spend time with the Team Phantom any time. She could be considered the hub of all gossips at school with how much information she gets from the most loud and chatty clique of the whole school.

Dani/Elly, Dan/Ozzy:

Dani: The first ever semi-success clone of Danny made by Vlad. Nothing really is different in their relationship, until Dani was in the most critical condition that had something to do with her unstable ectoplasm, which required her to have to be revert to a some sort of fetus and undergo a process similar to normal human pregnancy, but instead of putting the halfa fetus into Danny, it was put inside of a bottle first before a birthing pod when the halfa child became more mature and resembles a newborn. In turn, she'll be reborn back as purely Danny's child (think about Ben who asexually reproduced, but went through a completely different process) without any of her past memories in place. The art and technology of doing this process remains undisclosed. Her new identity became Eleanor Maria Fenton with the nickname "Elly", and she became the ghost princess by right of birth after her "rebirth".

Dan: Their relationship remains the same until Danny decided to properly take care of Dan (before the de-aging). Think of it like a Nahida-Scaramouche/Wanderer relationship. Although it was a painfully grueling process, Danny was patient and really think about Dan and his freedom and his disoriented characteristics at heart and tried to the best of his abilities to help Dan out through it all. However, it turns out the ectoplasm from Vlad's half in Dan was found out to have a corruption, making Dan going through an excruciating pain and suffering. In order to cleanse the corruption entirely, Dan have to go through the same process as Dani, reverting him back to that of a fetus, born now as a halfa, and restart everything from scratch. His new identity became Kalos Marcus Fenton with the nickname "Ozzy", becoming the ghost prince by right of birth after his "rebirth". He and Elly had became twins in this current life.

Cujo:

The ghost dog that Danny found outside the building of Axion Labs (no, he didn't went in and wreck the place, because I'm twisting some things in Shades of Gray because Valerie is part of Team Phantom from the start). The dog looked lost, confused, as if it doesn't know what to do, so Danny decided to take the dog in and brought him home. After a while, he realized the tag on the dog's collar, and figured that this dog at some point was a staff at Axion Labs or maybe someone related to someone who works at the lab, and decided to check what's the deal with the dog and the lab. Danny later found out that the ghost dog, along with other dogs before (he didn't know if the other staff dogs are also dead, but he'll have to check it up later) are used to be guards dogs decades ago, but they were let down when technology became more efficient. The dog canals, food bowls, and other stuff are being put in an abandoned storage space that was completely sealed off. But a single toy stood out to him, a squeaky toy. Since this is the only toy in the whole room, Danny assumed this might've belonged to the ghost dog he found, so he decided to go back home and hoping this is the item that the dog was looking for to the point of waiting outside the walls of the lab for, which thankfully it was. However, instead of going back to the Ghost Zone, the dog decided to stay, and Danny became his owner after asking Maddie and Jack (to which both agreed). Cujo became his name.

Vlad:

Good god, where do I even begin... Ok, I guess I should start that their relationship is a lot worse than in canon. Yes, he still had that hatred towards Jack, but he also hated Maddie as the miniature portal was also her creation as it is to Jack's. By extent, he hated both of their kids too (unreasonable? Yes, but anything goes for me-), but particularly Danny due to his status as a halfa and the many connection he had between the living plane and the Ghost Zone. Dani's creation wasn't because he wanted a perfect son, it was an attempt to use the clones as an army to attack Danny. Dan's creation was literally a succeeded version of Vlad's plan. Vlad figured that the only way to really hurt Maddie and Jack, was to hurt their beloved youngest, the more pain the better he said. Vlad was so deep into his hatred towards the Fentons, morality was completely out the window and down the drain for him. Every attempt was another way for him to destroy the Fentons of what they did to him, he wasn't willing to talk whatsoever, even an attempt would've been futile instead. Due to me completely erasing Phantom Planet from existence, Vlad was still roaming free under the facade of a good natured mayor while scheming to get rid of the Fentons by any means necessary. His ectoplasm became corrupted due to many times it was used to experiment dangerous creations and many mysterious methods. However, Vlad could withstand it due to his overflowing amount of sheer hatred, while Dan couldn't handle the corruption due to having Danny's DNA.

Manny:

A fellow member of the Nicktoons Team. Manny (alongside Jenny) joined much later. They started out as acquaintances then friends, then after a while, they both started a relationship. Manny's life became even more interesting by the time the twins came to the picture, and Manny wouldn't want it any other way. He's a great babysitter (and maybe even parent, someday).

Jimmy, Timmy:

Danny considered both of them as his troublesome younger brothers, particularly Timmy. It all happened because the Turners asked the Fentons if it's ok for them to leave Timmy under the Fentons for a while, and that's how Danny's babysitting career started (do not ask for details. If you know what the Turners are like, that should speak volumes enough). Danny met Jimmy a little later afterwards after seeing a lonely kid on the bench of the courtyard of Timmy's school, so he decided to approach him, and that's how they get to know each other. Danny was a bit protective towards Jimmy due to how many times he's been bullied and being treated as an outcast because of his high IQ, so Jimmy found a safe haven in Danny. Although Danny said he's more of their babysitter than anything, Danny turned out to be that of a parental figure of the team; slightly strict but responsible and gave out reasonable rules so no one gets into unwanted troubles even outside missions. Both Jimmy and Timmy viewed Danny is that of the 3rd parental figure who kept them grounded and the voice of reason and motivation for them. Although he is still capable of grounding them, like confiscating Timmy's video games and locking Jimmy's lab while taking the key with him. Jenny said it was a given considering many times those two caused trouble.

SpongeBob:

Danny's best buddy in the team. SB had always been the motivational one of the whole team and kept everyone in spirits. Literally the closet person he had in the team way before Manny and Jenny. Supports Danny through thick and thin, and was the first person Danny ever confided with whenever he had problems and vice versa.

Jenny:

Was the only person (robot?) Danny recognized in Center Shades, and the only one Danny talked with for a while until he got to know the other members (particularly Randy and Jake). Danny was Jenny's backup fixer whenever Jimmy is not available and/or wasn't with them altogether, hence the only person Jenny trust in the other team with her mechanisms.

Info Dumps:

I will be dumping a hella load of info in this column, so be warned if you don't want to read everything. I'm not really willing to make a separate blog about this topic itself, so consider it like a Danny speciality that you can't find anywhere except asking Danny himself;

The term 'ghosts' is an umbrella term used for all types of spirits that originates from all the realms of the Infinite Realms (commonly known as the Ghost Zone). Just because they're called ghosts, doesn't necessarily mean they are whatever that's left of a human spirit.

Ghosts aren't inherently bad natured; they're more driven by their obsessions more than anything, and doesn't really meant to cause harm, but their obsessions could clouded their better judgement, making them getting mischaracterized as 'bad natured' and 'pure evil'. They're not bad, they just need something to feed off of their obsessions to find a few specks of peace.

The Ghost Zone is actually named as Infinite Realms, but another name was also proposed when the realm was first discovered; Gap of The Sun. The reason for this naming is that it was once believed that this realm had been created from a sun that once exploded, and instead of turning into a black hole, it turned into a neverending realm filled with doors leading to many other realms. However, the naming and this theory was eventually dropped due to lack of evidence to support the claim of the exploded sun that created this primal realm.

The nature of ectoplasm is currently unknown, but it is theorized to be remnants of a spirit's will and their former drive when they were still alive. But due to the lack of evidence, there is no concrete info that the ectoplasm were remnants of the ghosts leftover living will. It was only left that ectoplasm are just what give these ghosts their shape after their soul no longer resides using a human vessel in the living plane.

There's a phenomenon between the ghosts called a "Death Day", where the ghost will have to relive the memories of their death, the feeling of pain they felt all over again. They would go completely paralyzed and won't be able to move at all as they relive the memories and pain of their death with nowhere to go as they couldn't move. The aftereffects when the day of their Death Day had passed are; extreme numbness, lacking color vision in their sights (everything is in black and white for them), complete blockage of their powers, and whatever that's left in their mood swings of their Death Day. The only way to minimize the pain during Death Day was when the spirit's living loved ones visit their graves or commemorate the death anniversary. Even then, that won't erase the pain entirely, as it won't affect anything in the aftereffects (although this is unclear for those who are born as a halfa). (This is inspired by that one DPxDCA fic on AO3).

Danny's ghost king title:

Ok, so I did said that Danny became ghost king in this version, right? Well, in version, Danny became ghost king a little later after the defeat of Pariah Dark. Technically, he was already crowned shortly after, but due to the fact he's biologically and chronologically too young to rule yet, it was decided that Danny have to wait until he was 20 to finally take on the big roles of being the king of ghosts. Until then, he was made to do smaller tasks that seemed a bit big to him at first, but once he became king, the weight was even more immense than what he had initially thought it would.

The Ghost Law:

A law that is absolutely mandatory to follow by all ghosts of every realm and every kind. Here are some examples;

Ghosts are absolutely forbidden to harm those who still resides the living plane by any means.

In terms of handling one's obsessions, it is absolutely advised to ask the Ghost King for any solution that wouldn't involved the living beings.

Killing a living soul or the environment of the living realm will be heavily punished.

In terms of living amongst the alive in the living plane, a barrier must be made around the property to prevent ghost hunters or unwanted guests from lingering the property.

When a soul from the living plane had lost its human vessel and could no longer resides amongst the alive (basically: someone died), it is an absolute must to inform the ghost king in order to conduct the 'White Farewell' ceremony for the now-departed spirit.

Personality:

Not much different, except he radiates mom energy all over. Well, no wonder. Along with Ben, Danny has plenty experience when it comes to hyperactive and/or rowdy kids, and had a huge sense of parental responsibility towards everyone. Both Danny and Ben would be fussing over those who would dive head first into trouble without a clear plan and getting injured in the process, or when someone did something incredibly stupid it ended as a huge problem (they're in the Overview department for a reason).

Danny is more... Elegant compared to the original. There's always an aura of grace coming from him, and sometimes his voice comes off a sort of a mystical vibes, even if he didn't intend to it. Although despite being king, his overall personality didn't change; humble, friendly, and approachable.

Battle attire:

Something like a royal outfit, but nothing extravagant. Ok, maybe adding a bit of claws on his gloves could be a bit extra, but you can't blame me, blame Ningguang-

The hair tho, I have been thinking like a Zhongli-style ponytail in battle form. But in normal form, like human form will varies depending on what Danny wanted. Majority of his hair would already be white even in his human form.

The design I came up with.

(Base: TheCherryMonsterLu (DeviantArt));

Weapons:

Polearm

Fenton Thermos

Flashdisk

Abilities:

Ghost powers

Ice powers (from his Ice Core)

Ectoplasm generating

Mind reading

Dream-jumping

Other Info:

Obtained the title or nickname as "Siren Voice", due to his mystical and beautiful voice. Think of it as those myths where sailors would disappear when they heard the voice of a mermaid/siren. This'll be hella useful for Danny in so many ways.

Ftm transgender, though he liked being called 'mom' by the twins.

Although he is a Fenton, he does not have the Fenton luck when it comes to driving (neither does Jazz). But he was usually being driven to by his ghostly staff/guards than driving himself. He still have a driver's license though.

Still can't get close to Blood Blossoms, otherwise he'll experience pain as horrible as the time of his 'death'.

Danny's body is sturdy but also hella flexible. He used to do gymnastics when he was younger, but his flexibility was greatly enhanced when he became a halfa.

Danny's eyes changed after the incident, not just when he's a ghost; originally icy blue, now blue on top half, and ecto green on bottom half. His eyes is still fully green when he went ghost.

The 2nd tallest in both at Nicktoons and the other team. Sorta thriving and suffering at the same time (the whole 'shorter people live longer' joke became a bit too literal than it was intended to due to Jake's longevity).

Danny would, quite literally, became a dictionary when someone would ask about ghosts, its nature and laws, etc.

Danny and June are actually pretty close friends due to their shared dreams to be an astronaut (even with their current circumstances).

Danny used to love eating sweets and desserts, but as Sam and Valerie monitored him and limit his consumption of sweet food ever since he had the twins.

Given everyone his protection seal, so ghosts couldn't really harm them, and it'll be much easier dealing with the ghosts like that because they're under the 'territory' of the ghost king himself.

At some point, Danny will start an orphanage for lost young souls who met their fate far too early. Randy might also do the same, but just with living children, and there will also be rescue shelters and such.

He, along with Jake are currently searching to find ways so that lighter energy-beings like Jake and June could enter the Infinite Realms due to having absolutely chaotic and mixed energies.

Danny's signature flower is Star Lit Orchid.

[yuri-is-online]

Cat Got Your Tongue? (MMO AU: Leona Kingscholar x Reader)

Master Post for AU: (x) please read for overview and links to other parts.

a/n: Sure Leona says he doesn't like video games but this is my blog and I choose the au. I ended up having to re-write this because the original premise wasn't working but this fits Leona's vibe a bit better. Side note, but I am thinking I'll probably write a sort of part 2 for each of these once I am finished with each of the main "routes" since there was some stuff I wanted to include in this fic but cut because it didn't flow.

notes: They/Them pronouns used for Yuu, loosely inspired by Love is Hard for Otaku and crappy otome games, Leona is a junior and Yuu is a freshman in American college years, some mild Ruggie slander? (he's hustlin and bustlin) Not a lot of gaming in this one sorry.

Sometimes Leona really hates having a functioning brain.  Maybe if he had been born comatose his family would have taken time to understand him.  Hell maybe he would have understood them.  And maybe, maybe if he’d been a bit more stupid, a bit more happy, a bit more inspiring and a bit less morose, someone would have looked his way.

Someone.  His bright green eyes settle on a desk strategically chosen in the furthest shadows of the classroom where someone sits.  They’re tired, fighting against the eight am death sentence of a class to stay awake and take notes.  Nose always at the grindstone with so little in the way of reward, just like always.  Sometimes he wonders if they’ve ever noticed his gaze, it’s been on them for a long time creating a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach he’d gladly brush off as disgust to Ruggie when pushed.  Not that Ruggie ever pushed hard over something he wasn’t getting paid for and he had enough sense not to laugh at Leona to his face.  They both knew it was worry.  It was written all over his face and twitching through his tail, they look up to meet his heavy gaze and twitch.  A smile works its way to his face involuntarily as he closes his eyes.  

He is getting tired of waiting.

~~~

[FC] <Tempura Kun> I STG IM GONNA KERMIT A FELONY

[FC] <Granny Smith> fr?

[FC] <Granny Smith> where we pullin up?

[FC] <Tempura Kun> whatever hole my Algebra TA crawled out of this morning

[FC] <Granny Smith> we pullin out (´×ω×`)

[FC] <Tempura Kun> （πーπ）

[FC] <Tempura Kun> real brave

[FC] <Tempura Kun> ur such a big man 

[FC] <Granny Smith> HEY

[FC] <Granny Smith> I thirst for the glory of combat not suicide 

[FC] <Gloomy Samurai> whisper or get in a linkshell if you’re just going to bitch and braid each other’s hair

You smother your screams with a pillow as your discord lights up with a call from Epel, which you answer quickly enough it barely gets a chance to ring.

“Just not yer day, huh?”  Epel sighs sympathetically, but you know he’s making that stupid smug face of his.  “Whatcha do this time?”  

“I accidentally gave Dr. Crewel some paperwork dad had me working on and when I tried to explain that to Leona, he laughed at me before I got it all out.”  Epel whistles.

“Did you get the papers back?”

“Yeah.”  You glare at your monitor as you settle into your desk chair.  “Would have been nice to keep my dignity though.”  Epel has enough sense to not to tease you more, just inviting you to a party and shooting a message to the guild to see if anyone is up for running a few dungeons while you stew in your frustrations, squishing your pillow and try to avoid reflecting on your day.  Realistically speaking it wasn’t that bad.  You’ve been pretty lucky in life compared to some people, as your adoptive father is so keen to remind you, he is very generous.  He’s paying for you to go to a good school (that he works for so he’s actually just paying for books), he let you keep Grim when pretty much every other foster family you were placed with tried to get rid of him, and you have a pretty solid group of friends left over from highschool.  But still, you like to think you have a right to complain about things, what sort of father makes his kid go through zoning laws under the guise  of “father child bonding time”?  And what sort of teacher’s assistant says that’s not his problem and snarks about taking off points of your actual homework?

Leona Kingscholar apparently, it’s his idea of a joke.  By the day after tomorrow he’ll be back to his lazy self, slapping a half assed grade on your homework with a bunch of snarky commentary that’s surprisingly helpful when you go to amend your notes.  Assuming he doesn’t hijack your table in the library to take a nap first.  He’s a pain in your ass, and the worst part is you really don’t know why.  Leona’s a junior, you think anyway, and outside of his job as a teacher’s assistant you don’t have any shared classes.  Epel plays on the Spelldrive team, talks him up pretty much every chance he gets, so you guess he’s pretty good at that if nothing else.  Maybe he’s mad at you on Epel’s behalf?  He invites you to their games sometimes, but you never go because you’re too afraid of the crowds.  The thought makes you huff in frustration as Rex and Snake join your party and begin bickering about what to que for; that’s between you and Epel, what’s his captain got to say about any of that?  What does he want to do, show off?

[FC] <Snake Whisper> Tempura you still good to heal?  Gran said you were stressed.

[FC] <Tempura Kun> I’ll stress more if I make you heal lol

[FC] <Tempura Kun> Thanks for asking <3

[FC] <Snake Whisper> σ(^○^)

[FC] <Snake Whisper> You’re good

You stretch and do your best to pop your neck.

Vivat Rex >> You shouldn’t stress about making him heal if you’re tired.  It’s ok to take a break.

Tempura Kun >> lol I like heals I’ll be good promise

Tempura Kun >> ty for worrying tho &lt;3 <3

Vivat Rex >> <3 ofc can’t have our only competent heals falling over dead

Tempura Kun >> HA i’m telling Nautilus u said that

Vivat Rex >> (^_~)  punk ass bitch deserves it

The instance cuts off your reply and you settle into your chair determined to enjoy the hour and a half you set aside for yourself today before you have to go back to being an overworked unpaid student.  Before you have to go back to trying to convince your friend Ruggie that you have a friend named Rex who is real and not a figment of your imagination that lives in your computer caused by dehydra- wait.  Your eye twitches settling on the date and time mocking you from the lower right of your second monitor.

“Epel.”

“Hm?”

“I need you to go wall to wall or I’m gonna be late for work.”

~~~

“Finally.”  Ruggie gives an exaggerated stretch as he yawns.  You sigh to yourself in relief that he isn’t too upset that you’re a few minutes late, you know Ruggie’s a busy guy from the few closing shifts you’ve worked together.  He’s one of the few people you feel actually respects your situation, if the side hustles he kicks your way are anything to go by anyway.  You’d hate for him to think you’re ungrateful for his help.   “I’m practically dead on my feet here, took you long enou-”  You pause in tying your apron, unsure of why he’s staring into you so disapprovingly you almost swear he’s been replaced by Leona.  Almost.  His signature laugh is too unique.

“Stuff it.”  You scowl and his laughter gets louder and it’s a wonder his tail doesn’t knock any of the cigarettes off the back counter shelves.

“Oh you look disgusting.”  He fishes his phone out of his back pocket as he clocks out, checking it just out of your view as you try to salvage your pride and settle into your seat.

“You don’t look so hot yourself either.”

“Yeah at least I don’t look like a truck hit me and backed up to make sure it finished the job.”  He looks somewhat serious for a brief second.  “When was the last time you actually ate food?”

“Before I came here?”

“Instant noodles don't count.”  Your silence is speaking volumes you don’t have the strength to combat and Ruggie sighs.

“I know I’m one to talk, but you should really get some rest.”  His lips quirk into a grin for half a second, quick enough to have missed if you had blinked as if he remembered something amusing.  “Unless you’re angling for someone to force you.”

“Like a health professional?  You know the old crow will just look for a second opinion.”  Ruggie lightly flicks your shoulder while he continues to focus on his phone on the way out the door.

“You mean thirty-second.”  He doesn’t even look up to say goodbye.  “Well I’m out!  Try not to scare off the customers.”  If you had to regularly interact with customers you would not have taken this shift.  Epel had given you a hard time about that, something about personal safety being more important than sanity.

[FC] <Granny Smith> not what I said

[FC] <Granny Smith> u should at least have someone visit when ur alone on shift

And you did sometimes.  Ace likes to drop by after practice, and Epel hadn’t said that with the intention of not showing up himself.  Jack and Deuce probably would have visited even if you were on a daylight shift, not that Jack would ever admit to checking up on you outloud.  But it was still very much only a sometimes thing, not that they didn’t care or worry they just had lives.  Most of your time at the convenience store was spent alone scrolling through magicam on your phone, only looking up to ring up a hoard of energy drinks for whoever was just as tired as you were.  Though maybe not today, Rex had tried to convince you to just call out.  He always does, complaining about how he’d have to run things with Nautilus now, but he might have had a point today.  The chair you and Ruggie snuck behind the counter is not remotely comfortable but you swear it feels like a cloud.  You tried to focus on your magicam feed, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to care about the fan art Gloomurai posted of the First Fantasia Knight Commander.  If anything it just made you sleepier, like he was personally inviting you to take a nap on his lap or something.  Your eyes shut and your phone drops out of your hand.  When you finally wake up you swear it has only been a minute at most but the smug look of your customer suggests otherwise.

“Morning sunshine.”  Leona looks painfully out of place in this shitty college convenience store.  The dingey, twitching light barely bounces off his hair and you swear his clothes have to cost more than all the electronic equipment in the place combined, maybe even more than your computer back home.  An odd thought to have, he’s literally just wearing the same kind of athleisure wear you had been wearing almost twenty minutes ago while gaming, but you recognize the branding on that shirt from a rant Ruggie went on a month ago.  Something about wondering why anyone would pay that much money to leave the house looking stupid in cheetah print.  “Are you even listening to me?”  Leona drawls, lazy and the slightest bit disappointed, he has been talking to you since you woke up you belatedly realize and completely fail to hide the fact.  Leona sighs, tail thrashing in annoyance as he moves to join you behind the counter.  “Whatever, just move over.”  You almost fall off your chair.

“What?  No no no this is an employee only zone you cannot take a nap back here.”  You have no idea how Leona is expecting to fall asleep, even if you’ve tripped over him on the campus lawn before you’re sure the green has to be more comfortable than this questionably sourced tile.  And yet he seems happy enough, bracing his back against the concrete wall as you turn your confusion back to the counter and notice a thermos that you don’t recognize next to you.

“That’s yours.”  Your head whips back around but the fucker’s eyes are closed and he looks so incredibly unbothered your loud retort dies in your throat.  He doesn’t bother to meet your piercing gaze no matter how long you stare at him, you get more of a response from the thermos when you accidentally elbow it trying to get more comfortable at the counter.  It’s a nice thermos, one of those expensive insulated things that cost a ridiculous amount of money, in a bright yellow that nicely compliments the royal looking lion sticker stuck to it.  There are a few other stickers, the NRC logo, a Spelldrive team logo, and a reaper job icon.  The last sticker makes you smile, you’re pretty sure you linked a similar looking sticker to Rex in the guild discord a month ago, the design included a silhouette of the cowboy hat from the class armor set behind the icon just like this sticker.  Exactly like this sticker, you realize as your tired eyes settle on the artist’s signature.  The shop bell rings you to attention, a significantly less interesting customer enters the store and you try to shove your rising panic to the back of your mind and try to focus on doing your job.

Leona’s annoyed sigh goes completely unnoticed.

~~~

“You aren’t going to tell Crowley I slept through most of my shift right?”  You have to be pushing things, Leona hates repeating himself and this is the third time you’ve asked him.  Leona had insisted on staying with you until the end of your shift, you had insisted he had better ways to spend his night but admitted, when he had explicitly asked, that no you weren’t uncomfortable with his presence just didn’t want to be an inconvenience.  That made him laugh, not unlike the little exchange you’d had this morning, but this time he had actually entertained your attempts at talking to him.  Until the time came to leave and he offered to walk you home.  Leona seeing you asleep at your shitty job was bad enough, the thought of that ramshackle house made your stomach tie up in all sorts of knots.  “I know you probably don’t see it as a big deal-”

“Because it’s not.”  He snorts.  “Really who do you think you’re trying to impress?”  You wince, Leona swings the thermos with that taunting sticker just out of view, as you huddle into yourself and he sighs stopping under a street light and turns you to face him.  “No seriously, just who are you trying to impress?  You’re always working to the point you’ve practically stopped being yourself.  It’s annoying.”  

“Well what’s it to you?”  You huff and Leona doesn’t bother to immediately answer.  Your eyes drift back to the sticker on his thermos.  

“Maybe I like playing games with you.”  His voice and face are uncharacteristically soft, but still unnervingly intense.  He doesn’t bother specifying what he means, almost like he’s daring you to ask first so he can make fun of you for thinking Rex was anyone other than him this whole time.  “Maybe I like Yuu enough that I want to spend just a little more time with them and not this weird zombie who doesn’t know the way back to their own house.”  

“Oh please-” you roll your eyes and turn back to the road only for your retort to die in your throat.  You are not, in fact, headed towards the haunted mansion.  This road, this stupid street light, is next to a diner you know the college sports teams like to go to after games.  Leona, gently, tugs you by the sleeve of your jacket towards the door.  “Hey, I can’t afford-”

“Oh don’t misunderstand we ain’t here for you, I was just feeling a bit hungry.”  The smug bastard doesn’t even pretend to hear your protests as he pushes his way into the diner and doesn’t wait to be seated.  He just drags you towards the back of the diner shooting you a truly catlike smirk over his shoulder.  “Of course if I have something left over, we can share.  Maybe if you play nice you can get your own straw.”  He spins you into the booth across from him, and despite what he literally just said shoves the plastic menu back into your hands when you try to hand it back to the clearly amused waitress.  

“How long have you known I was...”  You feel stupid even trying to broach the topic, there’s a pretty clear line you don’t cross when making online friends.  It’s even in the guild rules, you’re pretty sure “don’t ask for anyone’s IRL info” is probably Gloomurai’s life motto.  But Leona doesn’t seem to care, which you suppose is in line with what you know about Rex.  His laid back attitude was what had made him the most approachable out of all your guildmates, not that you would ever have thought to apply such a description to Leona.  If anything he seems confused why you’re so shy about talking, like he’s known who you are the whole time and that’s why he spent so much time pinging you in game or why he decided to spend his night keeping you company. 

“Maybe I like playing games with you.”  Something starts curling up in your stomach at the thought that he just might have, if Leona notices you loosening your jacket to release some steam he pretends not to notice.

“Epel mentioned he was gonna try to get you into the guild.”  Well that’s news to you, looks like someone is going to get yelled at later tonight.  “I didn’t expect you to be so excited about healing, but I ain’t complaining, it was cute and now I don’t have to take Naut’s shit outside of raids.”   Cute.  You intake a sharp breath and Leona definitely notices your nerves, clearly planning to press the point unless you can cut him off from the chase.

“W-what exactly do you have against Nautilus anyway?”  With the way Leona’s face wrinkles you idly wonder if he knows who Nautilus actually is too, or if he’s just displeased that the focus is no longer on him.  “He’s not bad at his role.”  

“Naut pays too much attention to pointless shit.  Sure he’s good but it’s not like he does world firsts or anything.”  Neither does Rex but that does seem to be besides the point when he’s paying for your dinner, especially now that it’s in front of you.  Diner food might not be the healthiest but Ruggie really was right about instant noodle not counting as a meal.  “You know he and Snake used to bitch at each other while they were supposed to be doing callouts?  Had whole ass arguments over cooking instead of calling out shackle timing.  Gloom and Musclered never stopped ‘em either since it was ‘funny.’”  They still do, just in discord and not while you run things.  It’s hard to picture someone as professional as Nautilus doing something like that, but then again you know that Rex has known him longer.  “So just in case you thought I was just being nice earlier, you are the better heals.  If I could get the cards I want with just you, Epel, and Ruggie I would.”  It’s disturbing how clear the picture is in your mind: your lala, Epel’s roe, and Leona’s cowboy coded catman being joined by some hyper pink catgirl in the mini game bunny suit that you can easily see Ruggie using to scam some tech worker out of his monthly salary in Pirate’s Port wiping to an EX rank trial because Leona decided his logs weren’t orange enough.  It sounds like a good time, and you can’t keep yourself from blurting out:

“We should try to run something sometime anyway, it’d be fun.”  And before you can retreat back into your shell,  Leona smiles, smiles and burns away any sort of shyness you wanted to have over talking video games with someone as “normal” as him.

“If you can think of something just text me.”  You fish out your phone and can’t even bring yourself to cringe at the time with just how happy that suggestion makes you feel.

And Ace said playing MMOs would get you zero bitches.

~~~

This was a mistake.  It was hard to keep that thought from drumming away at your nerves the longer you stood in the station square; Leona had been the one to invite you out, not the other way around, so if he really ended up not liking this then that was his fault not yours.  You even took into account that Leona was a lazy bitch and suggested you meet up later in the day instead, but then again…  You try to resist drowning in a wave of self flagellation over the clothes you picked out as you somehow manage to sink further into the park bench you have decided to camp out on.  For someone who had been so insistent they were not going out on a date when their generous adoptive father asked where they were going during such prime father child bonding hours, you felt insanely self conscious.  That was normal right, people who actually went out with their friends to do stuff other than pal around the local big box store put thought into their appearance.  Not that there was anything wrong with that.  If this goes south you know you already confirmed you can have Jack over here in two shakes of his tail and that’s probably exactly what you would end up doing.  But when Mannon posted in the guild discord about a First Fantasia themed pop up cafe that was going to be A) running for a limited time within walking distance from your house and B) giving out a code for an in game pet-

Well admittedly your first thought had been to invite Epel, but Leona had texted you almost immediately after Mannon dropped the link.

[irl catboy] ruggie said you aren’t working this saturday

[irl catboy] come with me to the stupid cafe i never know what to order at those places

With such a gentlemanly request how could you possibly refuse?  And now here you were fifteen minutes early trying to keep yourself from going stir crazy, or from jumping out of your skin when an increasingly familiar deep voice whispers a sleepy “hey” into your ear.  

“Seven’s Leona!”  You’re half ready to hit him with your backpack but your indignation and fright are almost entirely wiped away by the sheer figure Leona cuts against the setting autumn sun.  Someone, Ruggie you decide, because there’s no way Leona decided to dress up to come see you himself, forced your upperclassman into a knit  black turtleneck with golden claw-like trim on the neck and rolled up cuffs.  He’s kept his usual tan slacks, but the ugly woven sandals have been swapped out for a more weather appropriate pair of ugly slip ons with similar gold claws to the turtleneck.  His hair’s still tied up like he’s been at spelldrive practice, not that you fully know what he looks like outside of Epel’s descriptions and your own imagination. 

“What, did I scare you?” you drawls, clearly eating up the attention you’re lavishing on his appearance.  Before you can collect yourself enough to stand up he leans down to cow you back into the bench.  “Maybe I should scare you some more?  The mousey look really suits you.”

“Oh shut up!”  You huff and stand, trying your best to avoid cracking your head off of Leona’s stupidly broad frame as you both go to head towards the cafe.  “Did you look up the menu online or are you just planning on winging it?”

“You really like to put effort into things don’t you?”  Leona doesn’t look or sound too upset but there’s a strange wistfulness to his look you do not really like, but it’s gone before you can pick at it too much.  “Nah I figured I’d just let you pick.”

“Are you sure?”  You try your best not to sound excited, you swear the only thing you admire about Ruggie is his work ethic, not his grift.  “I could just take advantage of you and force you to get a bunch of stuff only I’d like.”  As if he’s reading your mind, Leona's green eyes twinkle with mischief you know will bite you in the ass later.

“Oh no you would never do that.  I know for a fact that you are just too nice for that.”  The “unlike someone else" goes unsaid as Leona decides to really double down on the gentleman act when you reach the cafe, holding the door and not even pretending to look at the menu until you prompt him.

“Do you want to get the reaper soda?”  Leona shrugs. 

“Does it sound like it will taste good to you?”  It does but that’s sort of besides the point, you’re much more interested in the white mage one.

“I just thought you might want the coaster.”  You murmur and he smiles.

“I’d lose something like that real fast, you can just keep it.”  Your eyes have to pop halfway out of your head with how hard he laughs, other patrons shoot a confused look at your table as you try to resist the urge to self combust.  “Let me guess, they’re worth somethin right?  In that case all the more reason for you to keep em.”  The look in his eyes is practically daring you to ask if he’s really sure, but knowing Leona he wants an excuse to tease so for now you swallow your insecurities and point your awkward smile up at the server who comes to take your order.  

“Um can we get one reaper soda, one white mage soda…” your voice trails off and Leona pipes up with the name of a burger you don’t remember reading out to him but they apparently serve anyway with how quickly she notes it down.

“And is the check separate or together?”  She sweetly asks and before you can so much as breathe Leona cuts you off.

“Bill goes to me.”  You glare at him, well try to really Leona’s a hard person to stare down.  “Didn’t I say you could get whatever?”  Not literally, it was more implied along with the trouble that you weren’t expecting to catch up to you this quickly.  His smile widens, not quite wolfishly, more like a lion staring down a particularly foolish gazelle that’s stumbled weak kneed into his territory.  “Go on, tell the nice lady what else you want, she won’t bite you, that's my job.”  Flames aren’t enough anymore.  You need to turn into a particularly fine paste or particle dust to relive how fast your heart is beating.  Luckily for you the server seems amused, letting out a good natured laugh as she shoots you a wink.

“You heard your man, what can we get for you?”  You take back every judgment you have ever passed Ruggie’s way.  With just how proud Leona seems like now he really is asking for it.

 ~~~

“You don’t really do things like this much do ya?”  Leona kept his teasing to a minimum after the bite comment thank god and kept his word about letting you keep the coasters.  Pretty much everything at the cafe seemed to have some sort of First Fantasia themed knick knack you were allowed if not encouraged to take back with you.  Leona had offered to walk you home once you both saw how dark it was, promising that would be your only stop this time much to your relief.  You weren’t sure how much more of his teasing you could take.

“I mean I’ve got Epel, but Ace, Deuce, and Jack don’t really like mmos.”  You aren’t sure if it has ever actually been established if you are friends with Sebek, but unless someone teaches Malleus how to use a mouse you doubt he’s going to be logging into anything other than a literal tree anytime soon.  “Sometimes Epel will send me links to merch he thinks I’d like, but he’s more into the…”  You pause to try and find the words for what it is you want to say, knowing your friend will kill you if you make him look lame.  “Sense of pride and accomplishment you get from beating high end content.”

“That sounds like him.”  Leona says proudly.  “He’s like that with anything mildly competitive.  One of his better qualities, just don’t go telling him I said that.  Wouldn’t want it goin to his head.”  There’s no way you’ll be able to keep his mild praise a secret from Epel forever, but what Leona doesn’t know won’t hurt him too much.  “But that’s not really what I was asking.”  Your pace slows as Leona lapses back into silence and you wrack your brain for what he actually could have meant.  “Do you like going out to cafe’s?”

“I… don’t really know.”  You liked tonight.  Talking to Leona, when he was awake enough to participate, was always fun.  Even when you were trading jabs back and forth in class.  “I used to dream about finally finding someone who I could do stuff like this with, but I kind of gave up after my last date said-”  you freeze in your train of thought and walk.  This had not been a date in any way shape or form.  Sure, Leona played a video game with you, and sure he’s been going out of his way to talk to you in real life more regularly since he came to visit your work.  But it’s not like he did that for any reason other than-  “said it was just too weird.  Said I was just too weird and I guess I just sort of got tired of not being able to talk about things that interested me so I gave up trying.”

“Then why not just date me?”  Leona’s eyes are a really strange shade of green now that you’re staring straight into them.  It’s like he’s got two neon lights shining a spotlight directly on you every time he speaks, judging and picking apart whoever he is looking at.  And right now he is looking pointedly at you, making it clear this isn’t a conversation he is going to let you run from.  “I told you before, didn't I?  I like playing games with you.  I want to spend time with you; I want to hear about your day every day, from what annoyed you to funny things you and your friends did.  I want to see you happy and know I made that happen, because you make my life a happier one just by being in it.  The only thing I have ever not liked about you is that you work too hard, and that’s not unfixable.  You just need to let me be a bad influence on you.”  It’s a confession you never really expected to receive, but somehow so very much him.  It’s insulting, honest, and just a touch demanding but it reaches into that small shrunken part of your heart that you’ve been burying most of your feelings in for who knows how long now and fills it with warmth.

“Would you-”  It feels like a silly question but with how intently Leona is hanging on your every word you feel a rush of power going straight to your head.  “If we were going out would you stop wiping things on purpose?”  He blinks, if he’s surprised by the request or shocked he got this far you don’t quite know, but he quickly recovers, moving into your space to offer his hand.

“If you ask nicely.”  You gladly take the offered arm and influence, squeezing his much larger hand with a soft smile.

“Then it’s a dea-”  Leona cuts you off with a kiss, swallowing your mouselike squeak along with most of your air with a speed you didn’t know he possessed.  

“Don’t use that punks line.”  He practically growls and you can’t hold in your happy laughter any longer.  It could just be the streetlights, but you don’t think Leona looks all that mad.  Quite the opposite really, not that you expect him to voice it out loud.  Instead he leans in for another kiss in a gruff effort to show just how much he means what he has been trying to say all along.

I’m happiest when I am doing things with you.

*if you are curious about Leona's outfit, I based it off of Lion King clothing items in Disney Dreamlight Valley (black and gold claw shoes, tan sunny slacks, and the gray claw top for those looking for specifics)

[mcu-fan-fics-blog]

Remember a Time XI

Series:  (Pt.1), (P.t 2), (P.t 3), (P.t 4), (P.t 5), (P.t 6), (P.t 7), (P.t 8), (P.t 9), (P.t 10) Wanda Maximoff x Fem! Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Fem! Reader ;) (High school Au ) No Powers Word count: 1904 A/n: Things are starting to get serious. I am trusting the process, everything will fall into place, hopefully. I hope you peeps enjoy the story so far I appreciated you all. Some love to the annon that sent me a message. (U know who you are <3)

Your first year of college was rather uneventful. Well that's what you liked to tell people, but in all honesty it was absolutely horrible. You and Natasha had entered this new chapter of your lives together and on the same page. You couldn't help but feel that by the end of the first semester you guys were reading two completely different books. Natasha was a go-getter she was impeccably amazing at everything she decided to put her mind to. She had chosen a very demanding Law major and on top of that she would give her all to train and practice to be the best. You didn't choose the easiest major, but it was lax compared to Natasha's 3 hours worth of reading each night. Business management was something that you felt somewhat passionate about. Your father had a somewhat large company that he built from the ground up. And you were fond of the idea of picking up the mantle when your time came. But you also had fun, a lot of fun. 

Once your mother found out you would be attending UCLA she made sure that you got everything in order to pledge to her old sorority. You'd never been the type to think that you would try out let alone fit in and thoroughly enjoy being a part of. You only pledged to your mothers old sorority and once the fact that you were a legacy came up you were welcomed with relatively open arms. "How's pledge week going, please tell me you're not being hazed by some weak blonde bimbo." Natasha said as you walked into your apartment. "No... I'm being hazed by a hot blond bimbo." You joked, chuckling at Natasha's disgruntled look. "Not cool.." She huffed "People don't do that anymore, but I think that I really like it there." She smiled. "I'm glad that we’re both finding our place." She said walking towards you and engulfing you in a tight hug and giving you a chaste kiss on the lips. 

That would be one of the last moments you had with her that didn't end up with the both of you fighting. You absolutely hated having arguments with her but the universe just seemed to want to pull you apart. Freshman year was a year of discovery, you learn a lot about yourself and your limits unfortunately sometimes you can get caught up in all that freedom to grow and and honestly lack of adult supervision. You'd become an avid party goer and maybe a tad bit of an alcoholic. Natasha was busy most days, her schedule was packed and you couldn't complain all the contrary you admired her dedication. But the lack of seeing each other was creating friction because when she could see and spend time with you, you were at a party or hungover, or busy yourself trying to catch up with school work. "We can't keep going like this Y/n what's happening to us?" Your tears were muted, you felt her sadness and yours. This was only going one place and you both knew it. 

Natasha was having a hard time. It took a long while for her to adjust to not being near her family, then it took her even longer to adjust to being with you in this new phase of her life. School was stress inducing to say the least of course she had things under control but that didn't mean she didn't stress all the contrary she only had it under control because she stressed. Soccer was as good as it could get. She only really pushed herself so hard because it relieved some of the stress she was feeling. All of her teammates were likable and trust worthy. There was one teammate in particular though that she could really see as a good friend and that would be Maria Hill, team captain. She had taken Natasha under her wing and taught her the ropes. There was something more there and she could feel it. A small wince or a clench of the jaw every time she mentioned you. There was something there and it was driving Natasha crazy. She'd promised Wanda and herself she wouldn't hurt you, and here she was considering it. 

It always came down to Wanda didn't it.

"I-i Natasha, maybe we should..." Your phone rang in your pocket with the last number you'd think would call you. It was Pietro, you were shocked to say the least. "I think that I should take this..." You motioned to the phone in your hand. Natasha nodded, wiping a tear from her eye too busy trying to compose herself to notice who was calling. "Is this Y/n's number? " The voice on the other end sounded unfamiliar. "Yes, I'm sorry but who is this and why are you calling from my friend's phone?" The person on the other end sighed. "Um, Y/n It's me Vision. Listen, you might want to take a seat or something." Your heart rate picked up and your shoulders tensed. Natasha noticed and she herself began to brace. "Pietro he um, he's been in an accident Y/n." Your heart ached, your hand moved to your chest, tears immediately welling in your eyes. "It's not looking good." His voice was heavy with sorrow. "She told me to call you..." Your heart broke at that, Wanda. "I'll get the next flight out, I'll be there as soon as I can. Please keep me updated." You urged. "I will just please come."   

The line dropped and your eyes finally met Natasha's. "Pietro's had a- He's been in an accident." You barely managed to get out. Natasha tried to step forward with her arms reaching for you. You moved back, your mind still reeling with what was about to come out of your mouth before you answered that phone, and the phone call itself. "I need to call Tony, He'll get me there in no time." Natasha's surprise was thinly veiled. "Y/n you're in the middle of the most important part of the semester, finals are around the corner, you can't just up and leave." Your eyes pierced hers. "I can, and I will. My friend could very well be dead right now." Calling him that felt wrong, he was more than a friend, sure things were rocky after Wanda. But you still cared immensely for him. You left her standing there in the tense silence you'd created. You dialed Tony he answered on the first ring. "Finally, my jet's waiting for you and Nat." You winced at her mention. "Just me, I'll be on the plane within the hour." Natasha drove you to the hangar, the drive was silent. It was uncomfortable, but you appreciated her being somewhat reasonable and not bringing up your conversation right now.

"I'll let you know what happens when I land." You said when you'd finally pulled up to the plane. "I think maybe you shouldn't." She said quietly, her eyes on the ground in front of you. You scoffed out a laugh, wiping the tears in your eyes. You nodded. "Noted, Goodbye" You didn't give her a chance to reply boarding the plane as quickly as possible. That flight was the longest four hours of your life. You weren't mad at Natasha you'd seen this coming just not like this. Never like this. It hurt but It would've hurt more if you'd both waited until it was too late. Tony was there when you landed . He gave you a crushing hug, which you returned. "What happened?" You asked, your voice breaking slightly. "Pietro was hit by a drunk driver on his motorcycle." You winced. "He's still in surgery. They're trying to stop all the internal bleeding." You nodded already trying to steady and strengthen yourself. Either way it was going to be hard. "Wanda, how is she?" In any eventuality it would be a lot to deal with. "No one thought this would happen, you never think something like this is coming." You only nodded. The drive there again was incredibly silent. 

Your eyes searched frantically for her, you definitely looked worse for wear no sleep and a prior maybe relationship break up was definitely taking a toll on you. When your eyes landed on her you knew she needed this... you. She looked pale, her eyes were dull, she was a ghost. You didn't look or feel any better but you knew she definitely was feeling it. Vision saw you first and quickly motioned you into the seat next to her.  He didn't bother stopping you for a greeting, he just let you be. Seating next to her was overwhelming to say the least, she still hadn't knocked out of her mind. Only thing you could think of doing was reaching for her hand. When you finally built the courage to, you reached out for her, her head barely turned to acknowledge you, but when she did it was almost an immediate her reaction. It was like the dam had finally broken and her breathing was erratic and her tears were overflowing. You pulled her up with you and into you. You put as much force as you could into the hug until she calmed down. You were just holding her. "It's not a dream..." She said into your chest. 

Your eyes watered. "It's not, but everything is going to be alright. Pietro is strong, he'll pull through." She nodded. "He has to be okay, You're here. He has to be okay." You could only hold her tighter.

Something had changed when you went back to California. Your apartment felt empty, it didn’t feel the same. It was hard to pinpoint at first but then you noticed it. Her things that were always somehow splayed in your apartment were gone. Even the most mundane things that she’d leave there were gone. Her drawer and closet space were empty. That’s when the dread came back. She'd left… 

Christmas was as bleak as it could be, it felt wrong to feel happy. You kept your word and celebrated with your parents. There wasn’t much to do, you and Tony spent a lot of time together during the month you had off of school. Surprisingly you survived and passed the semester. Things were grim, and Tony respected your space and left it alone as much as he could. Which meant that you third wheeled Tony and Pepper for the better part of a month. You avoided any and all contact with the Romanoff’s and they seemed to understand. Well all but one. “I told you not to fuck up.” You sighed. You were currently trying to open your front door. “I didn’t.” It angered you that she was letting this narrative run. You turned to look at her. “I came back, and she was gone.” You were about to continue when you heard the steps coming up behind Yelena. “I told you not to bother her.” Her voice washed over you like a bucket of cold water. 

Yelena was about to argue with her but quickly shut up when she met Natasha’s gaze. You didn’t bother shifting your gaze from your keys. Instead, you choose to turn and finish opening your door. You could hear Yelena talking from behind you. “You’re just going to let her walk away like that?” You closed the door before Natasha could answer, but you still managed to hear what she said. “Yes…”

Tag-List: @when-wolves-howl, @alyciaddict,​​ @username23345,​ @arixxxxxxxxa, @justyourwritter69, @picnicminded, @swiftdazer, @alphawolfchicago1124,​​ @sojo154, @xxxtwilightaxelxxx, @marvelogic, @wandasmistress, @alwaysgoodnight, @chickenlittlsblog

[starfruitgirlie]

guide for highschool to not suck

HEY GAMERS! I catch myself a lot looking at people younger than be and being annoyed or thinking "wow I know so much more than you" but when I was the age they were at I desperately wanted to be older and I wanted to know what I was doing and I sucked at life. Im 17 so I can only give life advice up to that point. I was absolute garbo at age 13-15. I was cringe, fowl, thought I knew everything, was experimenting with my identity and style, had acne, had access to the internet when I probably shouldn't have, the works. Instead of looking down on a reflection of myself I want to give advice on how to make things a bit better. Unfortunately, you can't avoid being cringe. However I was mentally ill and had adhd, and there are things you can do to make those things less sucky. (disclaimer I am not a professional and you should always reach out to a trusted adult or a therapist for help and not the internet!)

So highschool sucks it's awful it's absolute doodoo. I changed school districts so I went into my freshman year not knowing ANYBODY. I was also a cringe gender non-conforming queer kid with a bad haircut and bad fashion sense so I know what it's like to be picked on. so this is for anybody already in highschool or going into it or just wants to know what to prepare for.

I can't sugarcoat it highschool is so bad. It's not all bad, you can have nice experiences but ultimately it sucks because when your entire social atmosphere is insecure teenagers everything sucks. I just completed my junior year and I feel like I have made a lot of realizations just in that year alone. I'm not a senior yet so I'm just dipping my toe into college prep stuff so I am no where qualified for that so if that's what you want go somewhere else and if you get good advice tell me I need it. so this is starfruit's guide on how to NOT SUCK HIGHSCHOOL! (from someone with no friends and is lazy)

no one is looking at you as much as you think they are. I don't mean this as a "you're full of yourself" statement, it's an anxiety thing I still deal with. Embarrassing incidents are going to happen unfortunately. You forget deodorant, you have your period, you trip in the hallway, your pants rip, all the sucky stuff. There are going to be some assholes who laugh and make you feel bad but most people are going to understand. everyone knows what it is like to feel embarrassed and it won't be a disney-channel bully type scene if you mess up. even though social media doesn't show it, people make embarrassing mistakes and have accidents. It took some time, but I had to learn to laugh at myself and not take myself as as seriously. I don't spend my whole day hyperfocusing on other people or going out of my way to laugh at someone. It can be tough especially if you're as shy as I am but there will always be kind people who will offer help in situations like that. As you grow things will be less embarrassing. i am not at the point where that feeling is completely gone but I yearn for the day.

I was in my first AP class this year and at first I was super super self-conscious. I am a good student, but the people in that class made me feel stupid sometimes. They all took like 6 ap classes when that was my first one. reality check!! it doesn't matter. your future employer isn't going to go "So did you take 6 ap classes at once and get 5s on all of them?". highschool doesn't matter as much as you feel like it does. don't get me wrong, still try but be kinder to yourself. Don't compare your grades to somebody else's. A big part of this too is not asking people for what they got on a test even if you think they got lower. It's not done out of malicious intent, but I know for a fact a lot of good students ask other people for their scores to feel better about their own when someone answers a lower grade. When people ask I say "I don't tell people my grades, it's just a personal thing I guess" and people will move on. A big thing for juniors is the ACT. the day those scores came out it was awful. I had to delete instagram for a week when someone I knew posted their super-good score just to brag. everyone was asking what I got and everyone was comparing scores. "Oh I got a 34" and when somebody said "28" I heard "that's not that bad!". that is a phrase I hate. "it's not that bad!" SHUT UP!!! You can avoid this by not telling anyone your scores. the only people who know my act score are me, my therapist, and my parents. and I intend to keep it that way forever. I'm grateful that a lot of aspects of school come easy to me but this is applicable for students at any level. my grades don't make me any better of a person. What is important is to try your best and only compare yourself to yourself. if a C is your best effort, that's good! You tried and you put in hard work. school is not a true judgment of how smart you are what matters is you are trying and learning.

don't be on snapchat. my school used it for a long time to spread nudes and take pictures of alt people and make fun of them. and to also send threats. "what's yo snap" is not flirting. it makes me want to hit you with a metal bar. I can't really explain all that much but I just hate snap chat and I will never use it.

don't spread information you aren't sure is true. big and small highschools both can start rumors that get out of control. a kid who I never knew was talked about so much and the rumors kept spiraling I have no idea what is or isn't true. it's also just not that fun to talk about?? I mean there is a certain enjoyment in gossip but if you're just making fun of someone behind their back it's not cool and even if you're laughing in the moment that's not healthy behavior. and if your friends shun you for not wanting to do that and being uptight, get new friends.

ask questions. if you are confused in class, ask. even if it's a dumb question. I admit I have thought before "are you dumb" when someone asked a question but at the end of the day I'm just a hater and that person benefitted from hearing an answer and learned. if you can, email your teachers and go in during your study halls or lunch hour for individual help. I never would have passed ap calc without all the days I spent in my teacher's classroom during my lunch period.

set boundaries with your friends. you can still show your friend you want to talk to them and value their friendship and express you want to listen in class. also you're just annoying if you talk the whole time. that's the hater in me coming out I'm sorry.

stop following made-up social media teen rules you hate. that makes me sound old when I say that but I can't describe it any other way. an example of this is instead of asking for someone's snap, just say "hi I really like you do you want to go on a date and can I get your phone number?". have real human interactions. Just because Brady Smith and his friends always sit at that table at lunch doesn't mean you can't sit there if you get there first. just because it's "cringe" doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Be polite. shake someone's hand instead of dapping them up or whatever the hell. high five unironically. read a book in class instead of being on your phone. it doesn't mean you're trying to be quirky. it just means you want to read a book and people who make fun of you for reading probably should be the ones reading.

which leads me to: read more books. doesn't have to be something profound like a classic. it can be shitty YA vampire love triangle. it can be the series you loved in middle school about dragons. it can be something super long and profound. it can be non-fiction, it can be manga, it can be whatever!!!!! just read!!! just because someone to your left is reading jane austen doesn't mean you can't read warrior cats.

this might be more of an american thing but participate in dress-up days. this helped me overcome a lot of my social anxiety. even if no one else is doing it, I am going to dress like a cowboy because god damn it, it is dress like a cowboy day. i guarantee nobody cares. There's this kid at my school that regularly shows up in different costumes and I think its awesome and I also don't care. It could be some random tuesday and I could see Goku in the hallway and go "That's weird" and go about my day. Dress like Goku. End up on the school snapchat story with popular kids putting comments over it with a skull emoji. be free. The same kid also dressed up accordingly for holidays. Kids like that make you smile and you remember them fondly. my sister had a classmate who brought a toy thor's hammer to school everyday. i guarantee people made fun of him but thats awesome dude. nobody cares and if they do they need to get their priorities checked.

do your work in class so you don't have to do it at home. it saves time and you have more time to be lazy. if you have to work at home make sure to keep a planner. It's not cringe you're just being responsible. write it down or it will be gone from your brain in an instant and it will be 3 am and you will be writing a last minute research paper and not remember how to do citations.

make accommodations for yourself at school. for me this looks like dressing comfortably even tho I want to be stylish. It's also always bringing my headphones to school to have music on so I can focus. There's no reason to make school hard for yourself, bring things you might need, you don't need to raw dawg the day.

if you can, utilize time before school and after school to get help. I know so many people are busy so this might be tough but most schools will have resources like saturday school or they open early and have teachers who come in to tutor. at the end of the day though, prioritize you over your grades. You should still try but if you need the day to play video games and sleep, play video games and sleep.

to sum it up: stop comparing yourself to other people, compare yourself to you. only you know what you've been through and your level of growth. it's easier to be a happy teen when you arent worried what other people think. I hope this was useful!!!! thank you for reading if anyone made it this far.

[scoutbert]

Heyy idk if anyone here remembers me or cares but I figured I'd make a little life update just in case. And if not, maybe I'll just look back on it in a few years and smile.

I've had this blog for about ten years now. I was a freshman in high school when I began. It was memes, fandom, and the occasional depression. I even posted some pretty dark stuff a LOT of the time because I felt like I had nowhere else to vent.

Now I am 24. Twenty four!! I can't believe it. I lived!

I've been homeless, I've been traumatized. Went through a lot of stuff! If you like to feel sad and lurk, feel free to check out my tags for more context, haha. Some of it is pretty triggering and downright toxic so yeah take care of yourself.

But yeah. Twenty four. Sheesh. I am in a much better place now. I have an apartment with some friends and my partner. We have a little dog. I got a new car that I don't have to live in anymore. I work gigs like food delivery and dog walking. Money is always tight, but what else is new?

I still have a little problem with the booze and the weed, but I'm not searching for ways to destroy myself anymore. I don't seek chaos just because that's where i felt the most normal.

I'm learning to be okay with peace. And mediocrity. I used to- well, still do sometimes- compare myself to everyone I knew my age, people who had support systems I could never dream of, who went to college, and found their dream job. Who never wanted for anything. Always smiling.

I learned that it's not a competition. Life, that is. As long as I wake up every morning, I call that a win. It doesn't matter that this person from school makes six figures and already has a house and a kid. I get to wake up and walk dogs and look at trees and flowers, and I get to come home all sweaty and take a hot shower and make a sandwich. That's enough for me, for now. Much better than couch surfing and showering at planet fitness and eating gas station sandwiches.

Anyway. At the risk of overdoing it, I just wanna say thanks Tumblr. You were my anonymous diary for years. I received support from strangers I can never repay. I laughed at memes, made art, got in arguments about stupid shit.

I'm not leaving! Just expressing gratitude I never had. I am no longer full of hate. Just a morsel now, haha. There will always be a part of me that is bitter about everything I had to go through, and embarrassed at how I handled it. But I did my best and most people met me where I was at and accepted me anyways, even when I wasn't at my best. Thank you.

If I ever hurt you or exhausted you, thank you, and I am sorry.

Anyway. Yeah. Thanks. I'm doing okay. Good, even. Now that I'm not in crisis constantly- and I was in crisis for the better part of those ten years- I think I will find something I am passionate about, and work at exploring it. That sounds nice. :)

[registeredsinnertm]

Don't Look Away

Lots of people have told me about this “Hat Man,” often referring to him when I talk about my own hallucinations.  “He sounds like The Hat Man,” “Have you heard about The Hat Man,” “Maybe it’s The Hat Man.”  It got me interested in figuring out what everyone was saying about this entity.  So I did some research only to come to a dead end.  Everyone's experience with The Hat Man is the same.  He just watches, doesn’t talk or touch the person, no face but sometimes has eyes; he’s just there.  It seemed silly to me, that he just watches.  Especially when my hallucination actually interacts with me, he attacks in a way.  What makes things worse is that I don’t believe in the paranormal.  For some reason, not believing in it helps prevent me from experiencing what others have dealt with.  It’s a blessing, but also a curse from this experience.  He wants me to believe.

The first time I saw him was while I was getting ready for school.  I was a freshman in High School and actually had a good year, compared to the previous year in Junior High.  A group of old friends decided to torment me at the end of the year, all because I didn’t want to follow along with what the ring leader had to say.  I was lonely and desperate, made some imaginary friends along the way to cope; that’s something I regret.

Around this time of the year, the sun rose later and set earlier in the day.  Though the dark never bothered me, it gave me an eerie feeling every time I woke up.  I had a routine.  Wake up, change out of my pajamas, go downstairs for breakfast, and pack my bags.  Every time I went downstairs, something felt different.  There’s a feeling people get, like someone is watching.  I knew everyone was still asleep and none of the neighbors were out yet.  Our kitchen only had one window that faced the backyard and the backdoor, nothing people could really look through unless they’re a creep.  So when I went to look around to find out why I had this feeling, I’d be faced with nothing.

One Thursday morning, I got up and did my routine.  Wake up, change out of my pajamas, go downstairs for breakfast.  The feeling followed along like a shadow.  As I went to make my food, I had turned to get a plate from the cabinet when out of the corner of my eye I saw something different.  Snapping my head in that direction, I laid eyes on him.  People sometimes catch glimpses of things out of the corner of their eye only for it to disappear when they look back.  This wasn’t the case though.  I could see his silhouette so clearly outside the backdoor window, standing behind the tool shed.  He had no eyes, but I could feel them train on me.

The fear of him disappearing made me frozen in my spot, staring right back.  I was never good at staring contests, but it felt like my life depended on this.  No burn in my eyes could make me look away.  That was until the noise of plates clattering caused me to jump and look away.  I dropped the plate when I jumped, noting it was my dad who just was coming down to get some food as well.

“Are you okay?” He asked cautiously, raising a bushy eyebrow as he made some toast.  “It’s as if you saw a ghost.” Laughing at his own comment, I placed a crooked smile on my face and laughed dryly.

“Yeah…  I’m fine, just tired, I guess.”  Every morning after that, the same scene would play out; it’s as if a DVD for a movie was scratched.  Wake up, change out of my pajamas, go downstairs for breakfast, make sure he doesn’t move.  He never did for the longest time, but this became part of the routine now and I despised it.

While this kept happening, a few months later I had started going to a club at my High School.  We’d stay until 4:30 pm every Wednesday and I had to take the bus home.  By the time I got on the bus, the sun had practically set.  During my walk home, it was dark.  Since he hadn’t moved from his spot until someone came in and distracted me, I was never worried about dealing with him outside of that situation.  I’d walk home with headphones in, blasting some random music from my playlist and maybe dancing along.  On that Wednesday, I followed the sidewalk home and quickly stopped halfway there.  The feeling was there.  The feeling that someone was watching me and I could feel it right behind me.  Stupidly confident that it was my mind playing tricks, I turned to look over my shoulder to find him standing there; however he looked different.  His silhouette wasn’t clear, more glitched-out as he moved towards me.  The empty face was now filled with multiple eyes, all staring at me while I hurriedly backed away.  “If I look away, he’ll get me,” was the thought that ran through my head.  Not looking away felt like the only solution, but it didn’t work this time.

As soon as he reached me, his hand grabbed my shirt as his body grew larger; towering over me as I leaned back to look up into his eyes.  My shaky breathing came to a halt as one of the eyes suddenly turned to a mouth, opening wide and hanging over my body.  His mouth suddenly consumed me as I let out a horrified scream, finding myself sitting up on the sidewalk and panting crazily.  My eyes scanned the area, head swinging around frantically as I got up.  There were no more signs of him, but I could feel him staring at me.  Grabbing my backpack from the ground, I hurried home without hesitation.

One of the neighbors had heard me scream, only seeing me turn around and fall to the ground.  It raised concern, so they headed to our house and told my parents.  My dad already had suspicions, catching me staring out the window on our backdoor every morning.  So, he questioned me as if I was in an interrogation.  At this time, I had no idea what he was or what I was dealing with, only describing it as best as I could with words.  Words aren’t my strong suit, so I took out my sketchbook and drew out what I saw.  A glitched figure with multiple eyes.  This is when I first called him by the name I use to refer to him.  No, it’s not The Hat Man.  I called him It.

The only good news was that this didn’t happen every time I came home.  I’d still see him near the toolshed, just not on my walk home.  My parents decided to try and pick me up when they can as well.  We all worked as a team to get this fixed.  Even though there were still moments I dealt with him on the walk home.  Every moment was different.  Sometimes he’d just follow me or stare back.  I’d prefer those over the majority.  Most of the time, he’d attack me.  His new multi-eyed figure pushed me down to the ground either to rip out my throat or stab me.  It was always a different item too, not just a knife.  A glass shard, sharp stick, or even just his hands that morph into something.  The one thing that was always the same were his eyes and glitched figure.

I can’t remember if a month had passed or a year.  You lose track of time when you’re reliving the same moments over and over again.  All that was memorable was seeing a doctor concerning my mental health to try and get medication.  The hope was there only to be wiped away again.

“We’ll be starting you on a low dosage of Zoloft and raise it in about a month.”  She gave a smile to my mother and I, holding out the information for my prescription.  “If there are any complications, call me and we’ll try to set up an appointment.  Do not stop the medication unless another doctor states to do so.”  Once the medication had arrived at our pharmacy, my mother immediately started giving it to me as the doctor instructed.  Who knows how much time passed, it felt like a week when it most likely was another month by the time I’m sitting in her office shaking.

“The medicine has been making them worse, it’s not helping at all.”  My mother spoke through gritted teeth as her face twisted in rage.  “And you want to increase it?”

“Sometimes increasing medication works.  I think we just need to wait a bit longer as well.”

“No!  We are taking them off the medicine.”  She whipped her head to me and gave a worried frown.  “It looks like they saw a ghost.  They thought the mail man was going to kill them!”  Scoffing out a dry laugh, she leaned back against the coach and crossed her arms.  “I had gone to their room to wake them up for school only to find my child curled in the corner of the room in fear.”

“I’m sure it’ll get better if we increase the medication and-” “No, we won’t do that!”  As my mother quickly got up, she grabbed my arm protectively so I stood up with her.  “In fact, we’re not seeing you again.  You only caused more pain, so we’ll find another doctor.”  Before the doctor could reply back, I found myself quickly following my mother out the door.  Looking over my shoulder, my eyes landed on the nameplate on the doctor’s door and a small smirk found its place on my face.  Doctor Goodfriend certainly was not a good friend.

Whatever the medication had done to me stuck for a long time.  This time, the hallucinations turned to voices I could hear in the corners of the room.  I drowned in terror day after day, paranoia following me around like a lost dog.  It also kept glitching after me.  His face would be everywhere; I could see him on the bus I took, in the window of my lovely neighbor’s house, and soon enough in the silhouette standing at the bottom of the basement steps.  It’s oddly comforting to see him inside the house instead of outside.  That was the only area where staring at him kept him in his place.  However, it concerned my parents more as time passed.

As a few more months passed, the sun would start rising earlier and setting later.  I’d try to spend my days in the sunlight, hoping that It wouldn’t like that and leave me alone.  Although it worked more than I anticipated, the rest of my demons didn’t let go as easily.

“Did you hear me?”  My brother asked, causing me to snap back into reality.  His small hands held out a small video game that was clearly new, making me furrow my eyebrows and tilt my head to the side.

“No, sorry…  Could you repeat yourself?”  I asked with a soft smile which he gladly returned.

“That’s okay!  We got a new game for our DS though!  It’s the newest Pokemon.”  He chuckled out, turning the cover of the game to him and admiring it.

“Oh, did Mox get it for us?”  I asked, leaning against the kitchen counter as I reached for the kitchen knife.

“It’s sharp enough to get stabbed with.” A feminine  voice muttered from next to me.  Puffing up my cheeks, I tried focusing on my brother’s ramble on his new video game. “The water pokemon you can choose at the beginning is–” “He could easily push you and grab the knife.” Followed a masculine voice.  The other still there as well, just not as loud.

“– but I don’t like the new grass pokemon we can–”

“Honestly, I could see him killing you with it.  It would be worthless to call for help.”  The two took turns to talk about the scenario as my grip on the knife tightened.

“Oh!  There’s some new legendary–”

“Screaming would just get the rest of the family to come down and help him finish the job.  Would that be a better way for you to die?”  Shaking my head, I tossed the knife on the kitchen counter with a clatter and backed away.  Their voices kept bouncing around the room around me, making me feel way too dizzy but I didn’t want to grab onto anything.  Turning to face my little brother, I froze slightly at him as he reached out. “Are you okay?”  He asked worryingly as I backed up.  Swallowing the lump in my throat, I just nodded a bit before holding out my hand for him to stop.

“I just…  need to be alone for a second…”  Jogging upstairs, the loud slam of my bedroom door shook the house as I sat at my desk.  There wasn’t anything I could do to stop them from speaking and it was causing so much frustration to bubble up.  Leaning against the desk, I grabbed my sketchbook and pencil, quickly sketching out a few things to help.  Putting a face with the voices seemed like the best option and the noise of my pencil against the paper brought me back to reality.  As soon as the pain in my hand was too much, I pushed away from the desk and looked at the mess I made.  A page filled with eyes and two faces I could easily name as Andrew and Lexi; the two imaginary friends I made up when I was too lonely and anxious to talk to people.  Releasing a pained breath, my body slumped against the chair I sat at and I rubbed my eye.  Grumbling slightly at the sound of our family dog barking outside my room, a sudden wave of smell hit my nose, making everything in the world freeze for a bit.  My mom must have been preparing dinner and it smelled delicious.  Sitting up, I stared down at the new drawings in my sketchbook before closing it and standing up from my desk.  Food would be a good distraction, especially since I could feel the hunger in my stomach.  Our dog was still barking outside the room for whatever reason, so I prepared to hush him up as I opened my bedroom door.

So many eyes snapped to my direction and I found myself quickly pinned to the wooden floor underneath me.  As I panted heavily, my hand automatically reached to grab the wrist that belonged to the hand around my throat.  I looked up at It and tried to push myself deeper into the floor, hoping that I could get away from him.  My legs lifted up to kick him, but he quickly yanked me up a bit and pulled me close to his horrendous face.  While one of his eyes turned into a mouth, my face dropped in defeat as my other hand grabbed his wrist as well, fighting back to get released.  Despite knowing how this’ll end, I still tried to fight back instead of watching me once again get consumed by him. Replaying my inferno, his mouth hung open over me and snapped shut with a harsh chomp and I found myself gasping against the ladder that led up to my bunk bed.

I must have caused some commotion because my mom was crouched in front of me with a startled look.  Seeing her there made me push myself away from her and figure out where I was again.  I could hear her quiet comments, the best efforts of comfort from her.  The only response I could give was shaking my head repeatedly as she tried to reach for me.  Our dog came in and scurried past her, sitting next to me so he could lick my face.  The three of us sat there for a few minutes, waiting for me to calm down as my brother and dad ate their meal downstairs.  When my breathing slowed down and I seemed more stable, she gently grabbed my hand and helped me up.

“Let’s go eat and get a nice rest tonight…”  Caressing my hair, I looked up at her with tired eyes and nodded slowly.  “We’ll be seeing the new doctor this weekend, I promise.”  Leading me down to the dining room table, I sat down and tried my best to focus on the food she had spent making.  It was only then when I realized how different my hands looked; there was a small tint of darkness that I could make out, like ink.  Rubbing my fingers against the markings I made out, I figured it was from the drawing I had made earlier.  Art can be messy at times, especially if you do traditional, but my gut seemed to be saying that that wasn’t the entire story.

After we all finished our meals, it was time to head to bed.  Our dog followed me up the stairs, seeming to still show some worry about me.  As I reached the top of the stairs, I stared at the door to my bedroom as the encounter with It played again in my head.  Taking a deep breath, I pushed open the door and walked in with our dog close behind.  He sniffed around my room intently as I changed for bed and made sure my backpack was ready for school the next morning.  

Even though our dog doesn’t make a mess, I tend to close the door when I go to bed but decided against it this time.  There was a feeling that he knew something I didn’t.  Dogs have a sixth sense, as people say and that comforted me.  So he found his place in my room as I turned off the lights and climbed up the ladder to my bed.  Reaching the top, my breath caught in my throat.

There I was, sitting in my bed.  Staring at me with bright eyes and pitch black skin, similar to It and his appearance.  The only difference was that I looked normal with two eyes.  With the darkness of my skin, I couldn’t tell if there were any other features on my face besides those two.  Instead of just staring back, I decided to move forward a bit and sit opposite to my lookalike.  There was no way of telling if this thing would do harm to me like It does, so I just stared back.  My eyes furrowed as it adjusted to the darkness and I could see a small line of white where the mouth is supposed to be.  As I stared more, the line became more apparent against the silhouette.  It wasn’t until there was a full on smile on this thing that I also noticed another eye appear, right on the forehead.  My mouth opened to say something, but before I could even do that they jumped towards me and made me stumble back.

Shooting up from my bed, I looked over to my window to see it was now day and I had been asleep.  I didn’t remember ever laying down and tucking myself in.  Looking down, I took note that everything hadn’t been like how I remembered, that I definitely did go to bed.  But what caught my attention was the fact that the tips of my fingers were now black.  I lifted both of my hands to see it more clearly, only to be reminded of the interaction with It and the lookalike I faced last night.  It dawned on me that I finally touched It back yesterday when he tackled me.  The blood drained from my face as I thought about the lookalike.

Maybe the paranormal does exist.

[1d1195]

🎀-anon

So, how was your pedicure? What color did you choose? (If you did ask for manicure too)

You deserve all the cute stuff in the world😭🎀 I got up from a very long nap. My head is hurting, but that's fine. I'll take some painkillers, but anyway, so..oh! Yes! I have a lot of exams rn uni is very stressful and I'm only a sophomore😭 but I do care about every class cause I have a lot of dreams and I will hopefully achieve them one day. Btw I'm studying English literature and translation (Arabic - English). I'm an Arab!

Yk, sometimes I feel like I'm the mom in my group of friends, too but getting to know more people i learned that my bff is the mom shes always telling ppl off when they are being rude go me like the other day a colleague of ours was like twlling me that "i dont know anything about Hamlet" like literally 5 minutes before the exam (was she expecting me to help her cheat?)😭😭 so my friend was like oh and what should we do? She's so awesome.🎀

So my exams today went well, pretty well. I don't know why I stress sm when I do well, but I'm thankful. I STILL HAVE 3 OTHER 😭 I literally hate this lifestyle but I'm just a girl yk?

So my ex friend.. well she was toxic from the beginning but I don't know why I kept her I just think she wasn't as bad? Like well she is a bit of a pick me (I'm not trying to talk bad about her I swear I just can't find a suitable description other than that) so when the doctors started acknowledging me in classes she came up to me and started making conversations. So I noticed that she was toxic when she was convincing me to give her answers and when she took my notes without even asking and always, always turning the tables. I swear to God it took me a year and a half to make the decision of cutting her off. Even the prof who I was doing the presentation for and stopped her from ruining it noticed and she talked to me asking me what happened and that she always saw us together, but I didn't want to talk bad about her I just said that I think we're better now and that I don't want to get back to that state again (overthinking if I am the one who's being a lot and not respecting the other person's feelings) but to be honest the breaking point was when she said that I'm trying to show myself off in the presentations we did together I was deeply hurt and the next week she and her circle (one of them being the first girl I knew in campus) but they all sent me looks without talking to me I was with my other group of friends like usual and when I talked to my other friend, mutual friend, she said that the ex friend talked about me with all of them and told them that "I changed and I don't hang out with them anymore and that I am a lot of other stuff" so I decided to stand for myself and now I don't even care about her she's just being rude for no reason (idk why my haters are increasing by time😭 they're just being rude but when I don't act as kind as I did back as a freshman they just hate on me but I don't care that's how we should be right?)

So yeah.. that's the whole story💕💕💕

I STILL HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT THIS GUY WHO ACTS LIKE THE WICKED STEP MOTHER😭😭😭 HE'S AN ASSHOLE ALWAYS TRYING TO HARASS ME AND SOMETIMES MY FRIENDS I HATE HIM OHHH THATS GONNA BE A LONG ONE TELL ME IF YOU WANNA HEAR IT?😭

My pedicure was good! I picked like this light blue sparkly color. I'm a little bummed it smudged a little (I did a regular pedicure not gel).

I'm sorry about the headache I hope it's gone away since you messaged! As always, I'm so in awe of anyone that can speak two languages. I can barely speak English and it's the only language I know 😭 It sounds like your bff is the best! I love that for you! THREE MORE EXAMS?! You are a trooper.

As for your toxic ex-friend: the very first thing you said? You're not sure why you kept her around? I don't want to put words in your mouth (nor compare yourself to me, I know we're still getting to know each other). I for one have kept a lot of people in my life who I probably shouldn't have for much longer than they needed to be. I tend to naively see the best in everyone even if it's harmful to myself. Unfortunately, I'm wrong a lot. But on some level they WERE your friend, right? Like you did things together, had stuff in common, for better or for worse there was a connection and I don't think that's something that just happens and it's hard to just ignore that connection past it's prime if you will.

I'm glad you stood up for yourself, that's something I definitely DO NOT do. I'm glad you have a good friend group to support you and that you're pulling away from your ex-friend. It's natural to grow apart from friends that no longer help you be the best version of yourself so I'm glad you have a group of friends that are kind and lovely towards you 💕

You can tell me all the tea of whoever you want! Bring on the wicked step mother! 😈

xoxo

[uncloseted]

I found out earlier that someone I went to high school has a successful modelling career and is working runway and commercial abroad. However, that person wasn't really nice to me in freshman year. I can say the same about a few others I knew who are like living a good life and have graduated, travelling, working in cool jobs etc knowing that they weren't nice to me or the people that weren't as "cool" as them. Im still stuck in my hometown working at a bum ass job and I cant stop the comparison

and to add onto that, I'm sure they probably don't even remember nearly half or little or most of the behaviour in high school, I'm hoping they're grown from that and are nice and humble now, but watching people I knew in HS peak while I'm still kinda struggling financially and academically etc at 22 just makes me feel like shit. Like it sucks finding out your school bully peaked post-secondary, yk? I guess my brain is just telling me these things.

I think we all want to believe that the world is a just and fair place and where people who have been mean to us will face cosmic consequences for it. But I think the truth is that the world is kind of random. Sometimes people who are mean make it far in life for no other reason than they got lucky. All we can really do when that happens is focus on ourselves and working towards living the lives that we want to live. It's much less tantalizing to compare ourselves to other people when we're happy with who we are and where we are in life.

[tannieastrology]

Ranting about my crush

This is gonna be a long rant so be prepared! I’m gonna start by telling you our placements.

He is a Gemini Rising, Cancer Sun, Capricorn Moon, Leo Venus, Virgo Mars

I am a Libra Rising, Aquarius sun, Scorpio Moon, Capricorn Venus, Gemini Mars

So about three or four years ago in 6th grade I had met him in school because we had a class together for history. At first sight I never really thought much of him. He wasn’t my type (he’s very short) and we never talked much. He was just any other boy I knew in class and I remember actually liking an upperclassman at the time.

A year later in 7th grade the feelings for the upperclassman went away and I was crush-free. Me and him joined crosscountry for the first semester and we started talking a little more. It wasn’t much, I mean, I can only remember talking to him like 3 or 4 times, but everytime we talked he was always harsh and sarcastic. Maybe it was because I was a top athlete and student at the time so maybe he was bitter because he was struggling in athletics? I’m not sure because honestly, I’m still trynna figure that out. He was always supportive when I ran though and I can remember the times when he used to cheer me on. We had no classes together and we were not important to each others lives at all. Thats all I can remember from our interactions that year.

Now the third year, which was 8th grade last year, was when things started to change. I had about four classes with him and we also had extracurriculars outside of school like choir and athletics. I used to talk to his friends and they used to tease me a lot because thats just how we talk to each other. I guess he saw I was comfortable with their bickering so he got in on it and now, that’s our regular way of talking because that’s how we bonded. Our relationship is weird to say the least. Its like provoking the other gives a certain satisfaction. The constant insults, the competitiveness, the jokes, and time spent together all eventually made me fall for him. It wasnt until my birthday in January that made me realize I liked him. No happy birthday came through from him, but then again, we’re not close. After that, everything he did started to do upset me. It made me wonder. Why does he talk to me like that? Does he hate me? Or do I hurt his ego? It was just that he actually started to insult me and started to make sterotypical racist jokes even when I asked him countless of times to stop. Cause I’m Indian and he’s Vietnamese right, so he thought it was okay to make those types of jokes because he’s asian too. The fact that I like him made me more sensitive to what he said compared to other people. Because he never talks to anyone else like that and we werent even that close for him to be talking to me in that way. Each day my mood depended on how he talked to me. I got obsessed and I used to zone out wondering if he liked me back. What made everything more complicated was that he liked 2 other girls. The first girl was my friend. They liked each other in 6th grade but they were too shy to approach each other. When 7th grade came around he started liking the 2nd girl. He was really down bad for the second girl and still is. My friend had asked him out during the first semester but he said no because he like the 2nd girl more. Throughout the year all of our laughs and bickering eventually had alot of people shipping us including my science teacher because they think we have a enemies to lovers relationship. All I can say is that he had me on edge. Ive never felt this strongly about anyone before. He was nice one day when he needed answers and then the next day he was back to annoying me. I’m not gonna lie sometimes it was really cute but a majority of the times he crossed the line. So much happened within the year that I cant even explain everything but all I know is that I’m down bad.

Now freshman year has rolled around. I have no classes with him which is great because I’m trying to move on but its not working. The girl he’s liked for three years got asked out by his best friend to homecoming and I’m sitting here hoping for more. In the summer I talked to him over text and told him to back off the insults which clearly didnt work. I tried to ignore him and be nice to him so many times but he always comes back and bothers me. And this bitch always stares at me so intensely like he wants to kill me. Its frustrating that he got me stuck in this endless loop of mind games. I dont know how things are gonna end up. Ive held this in for so long I just needed to let it out. Thank you for listening.

Heres the synastry and composite chart in case yall want to see. He’s blue and I am red

I’d love to hear about your story of unrequited crushes! Please leave a comment and tell me what you think of him and why he acts like that!

-Simi

[maxineswritingcenter]

Short Stack - Stiles Stilinski x fem!reader

@nyotamalfoy : So, I was thinking, could you write a Stiles Stilinski x reader? Like the reader is short and the pack just loves to make fun of her (all in good sense) and could it include Derek too?

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The problem with hanging out with werewolves wasn't that they were werewolves. It wasn't that that they could potentially lose control and kill you (although that was a concern on the full moon). No, the problem was that they were all giants. No one was under 5'10. And being someone who was considered a normal height, maybe shorter, (Y/N) was the butt end of everyone's’ jokes.

Before the whole werewolf thing happened, it was usually just a joke here and there from Scott and your boyfriend, Stiles. But Stiles knew better than to say a joke more than once.

But now there were a gaggle of freakishly tall individuals around her all the time and they loved to point it out too. They all had their own nicknames for her, even Derek. The only person who could even understand her situation was Lydia, who was a whopping five-three. But no one made fun of Lydia about her height, mostly because Lydia was un-make-fun-of-able. 

Lydia and (Y/N) were sitting on the bleachers, watching a Beacon Hills scrimmage. It was one of the last few games that Scott would be coaching since he was going to college full time. 

Next thing you know, Liam and Theo walked past them, playfully shoving each other. 

“Sup Mighty Mouse.” Liam smirked as they walked by. (Y/N) sighed loudly in frustration. Lydia glared after the two and huffed. 

“Why do you let them do that?” 

“Because I’m not intimidating like you?” Lydia opened her mouth to retort, but closed her mouth and thought a moment. 

“Okay.” She shook her head, “Yeah. But still? So what if you’re short? I accomplished a lot being short.” 

“Like what?” 

“Being popular and surviving this hell hole of a town.” She said as if it were obvious. (Y/N) nodded after a moment. Maybe it was obvious. Being human in this supernatural town meant you a little underwhelming. You feel alone in your little world. 

-

After the game was over, Lydia and (Y/N) were standing around, waiting for Scott and Stiles to get done with the team meeting. 

“Alright, see you at morning practice, guys!” Scott waved to the players and made their way to the two. 

“What’d ya think?” Stiles came around, wrapping an arm around (Y/N)’s shoulders. 

“It was a great game.” She smiled.

“Sure you could see over the people in front of you?” Scott joked. Stiles chuckled, but dropped the smile when he saw the look on his girlfriend’s face. Lydia glared, smacking Scott on the shoulder. 

That was last straw. 

“That’s it. I’m done.” She shrugged Stiles arm off of her shoulders, making her way to her car and driving away. Was this dramatic? Absolutely! But everyone she knew was in the running for Miss Drama Queen Beacon Hills, the winner would be crowned by Peter Hale. 

(Y/N) was just so sick and tired of all of them making fun of her. Sure, it was all in good fun. But all the time? Enough was enough. 

The cliffs were a good place to go when you needed to think things over. Stiles had called a few times, voicemails apologizing with Lydia in the background telling him how dumb he was. (Y/N) just sent a text back saying that she just needed time for herself. But even that was too much to ask. 

(Y/N) sat on the edge, legs swinging. Footsteps made her heart jump, she turned, pepper spray in hand. 

“Back up fiend!” She shouted at the darkness. She heard a chuckle and the familiar figure of Derek Hale appeared in her sight. She relaxed, setting her pepper spray back in the spot besides her. 

“Fiend? What year are you from?” He looked down at her, “What are you doing out here by yourself?” 

“Being pissed. Would you like to join me?” She swept her hand out to offer him the spot in the grass beside her. 

“Being pissed is my specialty.” He sat down, staring out at the city below, he leaned back using his arms to keep himself up. Derek used to be the most intimidating person she knew, but after a while she saw that Derek was just like anyone else. But he had a real bad case of grumpy face. 

“What are you pissed about?” She asked, glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. 

Derek shrugged, “Why wouldn’t I be pissed? My uncle killed my sister, tried to kill me, etcetera bullshit that we’ve all been through for the past couple years.” He looked at her, “What are you pissed about?” 

“Well, now I would rather not say.” What she was pissed about didn’t compare to Derek. 

“C’mon, Short Stack, you can tell me.” 

She sighed, “It just that... I’m so sick and tired of being made fun of for my height. Every once in a while, sure, I can take a joke, but lately it has been constant. Just...” She looked at him, seeing that he was actively listening, “Never mind, it’s stupid to be mad about this.” 

“It’s not stupid.” Derek said, totally surprising (Y/N), “You want more respect from the pack. I understand that.”

(Y/n) blinked a few times, “Really?” 

“It’s only fair. You’ve done a lot, you earned your position in the pack, you deserve respect. I’ll talk to them about it.” 

She shook her head, “No, Derek, that’s-” 

Derek smiled, “I got it.” He stood up, helping (Y/N) to her feet. It was nice to see Derek smiling, especially after everything that had happened to him. 

“Besides, I’m grumpy face, aren’t I?” 

Her eyes widened, covering her open mouth with her hands, “Oh my god, who told you that?” 

“Lydia is loud.” 

-

Like usual, Stiles was at her house after having used the key he made to get in. He stared her down as she watched Xfiles reruns. He came around, standing in front of the screen just as they were about to reveal the aliens. 

“Is there a reason why you are interrupting Xfiles time?”

He crossed his arms over his chest, “Since when are you and Sour Wolf friends?” 

“I thought we were all friends.” (Y/N) moved on the couch to get a better view of the TV. Stiles sighed and fell down on the couch besides her.

“We are. But Derek basically called us together and told everyone to stop doing the short jokes all the time.” He titled his head to the side, “Then Theo asked if he was your guard dog now and lets just say he’s gonna need the night to heal the bones he broke.” A grin pulled at her lips at the thought of scary Derek Hale getting her the respect she deserved, even fighting the pack to get it. 

“What’s the problem?” She asked. 

“I guess... The problem is that you should have come to me first. I’m your boyfriend and that should be my thing. To defend you.” She guessed Xfiles had to wait. She turned to Stiles to fully look at him. He looked upset, a little pout on his face. 

“It’s hard to talk to you about it when you laughed at it today. I got angry with you. Derek just happened to be there and we talked.” She rested her head on his shoulder, “I know you would defend me with your whole heart. Derek’s just faster.” He mocked offense, his mouth agape. 

“Faster? You better be fast then, missy!” His fingers found their way to her sides, tickling at her ribs. She yelped and scrambling up, running through the house with Stiles close behind. Laughter filling the empty home as the TV played in the background. Maybe being around tall people all the time wasn’t so bad. Sometimes they defended your honor and sometimes they were the love of your life. Sometimes the tall boy you met freshman year, the one who tripped over his own feet, would be the boy you spent the rest of your life with. Through thick and thin. Through life and death. And that was worth it, right? 

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Thank you for reading!

[skippermelody]

Max and Steve are my favorite sibling duo now because of Stranger Things S4 and since no one is making content for them I did it myself.

Summary: Steve goes to check in on Max a few months after the Byers' move. Mentions of death, abuse, and absent parents

Steve had only hung out with Max a few times. It wasn't his fault that most of those times happened to be when they were saving the world. Although, if he was being honest with himself, he should have gone to see her sooner.

Him and Billy had never been friends. Far from it actually. But Steve could tell Billy had pulled the short straw compared to Steve's family drama. Steve couldn't begin to imagine what that had meant for Max.

After the Battle of Starcourt, Max had seemed...fine. She had continued dating Lucas, she hung out with the rest of the kids, she slept over every night at the Byers' with Eleven until they moved. Everyone else assumed Max was taking the whole thing rather well.

Steve knew better.

Steve had never known death so personally but he knew the struggles of hiding pain behind a happy face. Nancy herself had called him out on it the fall of his senior year. Instead of dealing with the pain of family abandoning him and not paying him any mind, he surrounded himself with so called "friends". He drank. He partied. He dated. He had a cheesy grin on his face and made sure his hair was styled just so.

Max was lucky the people she was surrounding herself with were people that did care. That would listen if she ever needed to talk. But for whatever reason, she never did.

That's why Steve had decided to go over to Max's. It would be her turf. It would be most comfortable for her. Steve thought himself more mature than the other kids as well. If she needed to talk, he may be able to give some advice as well.

Steve pulled into the neighborhood using the directions Lucas had given him. Steve had never been in this area of Hawkins even though he dated a few girls who had lived there. He had always invited them to his place since his house was always empty.

This neighborhood wasn't exactly bad it just wasn't Lake Nora. Steve lived a privileged life. His opinion on that changed on the day of the week. Sometimes he found himself sleeping in the woods behind his house because he couldn't stomach the idea of sleeping in his bed.

He pulled into Max's driveway and looked at the small house. From how imposing Billy was on the basketball court, Steve couldn't imagine living with Billy in such a confined space. He could only hope Billy turned down his temperament when he was at home.

Steve went up to the door and knocked. He waited for footsteps that never came. He knocked a bit louder. Still nothing. He tried to look in the nearest window. No lights seemed to be on. "Damn Sinclair. You told me she would be here." He would already seem like a creep. 20 year old looking through the windows of a freshman's house.

The truth was that Max was home. Or at least coming back to it at the moment. She was on her skateboard. The thing she did when she was alone. It was easier to skate outside than do anything inside that empty house.

She rolled up to find none other than Steve the Hair Harrington looking inside the windows of her house. Was everyone in this town a stalker?

"Hey Harrington! If this is your new strategy for picking up girls, you're going to go to jail."

Steve turned suddenly at the sound of Max's voice from the street. He sighed and put his hands on his hips, "Sinclair said you'd be home today. I assumed that would mean in your home."

Max hopped off her board, but stayed in the street, "Well that was very presumptuous of you, wasn't it?"

"Yeah I guess it was" when he realized she wasn't going to walk up to the house he walked to the street, "What are you doing anyway?"

Max could feel herself adjusting her stance as Steve came closer. He was obviously taller than her, like Billy used to be. Max had learned how to make herself seem taller when interacting with Billy. It was a defense mechanism. One that now engaged whenever a taller man was near. She knew Steve was harmless - even if he had randomly shown up at her place for seemingly no reason - but her subconscious would react this way no matter what. "I could ask you the same question Harrington."

Steve stopped a few feet back and looked at the girl in front of him. With that question alone he was reminded of Billy. Max had an invisible wall around her, stopping him from even thinking about putting a foot in the street. Steve wondered if the kids ever sensed that.

"I came to check in on you," he saw no reason to lie to Max. Although he already knew how she would respond to that:

"Well thanks a lot, but I don't need a babysitter Steve."

Her eyes were ice as she looked at him in disgust. Such a fiery spirit in that small body. He tried a different tactic, "What has you so attached to that board anyway?"

Max looked at the board she had leaning on her leg. It was her escape from everything. Her happiest memory was her first time riding a skateboard. She had gotten scabs on her knees that still had remaining scars to this day, "It's - it's just a fun thing to do on the weekend."

Steve stared at her for a moment. She still had that wall but there was a slight softening in her eyes, "More fun than hanging out with your friends?"

"As hard as it is to believe? Yes." Her eyes had hardened again. It seemed the skateboard was his safest form of conversation if he wanted a way in.

"Really? I've never tried it before."

Max scoffed, "I'm not surprised. Pretty boy like you probably couldn't handle a scooter."

"Probably not," he held her eye contact as he slowly stepped forward, "Could you show me?" He was giving her the option to be in control of the situation.  He'd leave if she asked him to, if he didn't he knew she'd threaten to get a lawyer, but he was putting the situation in her hands.

She scrunched her eyebrows together. There was no reason for Steve to be here. She knew that. He was the last person she'd expect to show up at her door. But here he was all the same. Maybe - "Are you sure you don't need any knee pads or a helmet?"

Steve smiled and chuckled, "With everything I've been through I think I can handle a few falls."

Max remembered the bruises and blood covering Steve's face from the Russians. And then there was that fight...

As Max handed Steve the board she started "You know, I know he's not here to... um... apologize for-"

Steve put his hand on her shoulder, "Hey, you don't have to apologize for him. He was his own person that made his own choices. And besides, he wouldn't apologize to me for what he did."

Max nodded along silently before saying, "Yeah, he probably would have told you what you were doing wrong the whole time."

"You know he actually did! After he knocked me to the ground."

Steve and Max shared a laugh before Steve motioned for her to get started on teaching him how to skate.

They hung out for about an hour. Keeping it light. Steve made dude to be dramatic when he fell to make her laugh. He hadn't seen her truly laugh before. He thought to himself If I had a sister, I think this is what it would be like.