#Like I literally know almost all of the ppl that work there and vice versa

[jellyjamheadobb]

Not this being me at a local grocery store earlier :D

[realcube]

YOU GOT: KEIJI AKAASHI

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ matchup for @veggiesoupdumpling

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ if you would like a matchup, read this!

'i'm a leo!'

𓆩♡𓆪 i'm pretty sure akaashi is a sagittarius

𓆩♡𓆪 which means you are both fire signs :D

𓆩♡𓆪 which usually indicates a very passionate romance

𓆩♡𓆪 anyway here's a quote from some ppl who know a lot more about zodiac than me:

𓆩♡𓆪 'Together, they form a dynamic and fun-loving couple who can make all other signs envious of the greatness of the Leo and Sagittarius love compatibility. With both signs' elements being fire, they might experience the occasional impatience and intolerance of each other's grandeur. But, they will also exhibit endurance.'

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

'i'm a big fan of reading, especially when it comes to psychological thrillers like the secret history and classics like jane eyre.'

𓆩♡𓆪 omg i think akaashi is probably a very big reader too

𓆩♡𓆪 i mean, he does become a manga editor post timeskip soo

𓆩♡𓆪 he would really enjoy discussing those sorts of stories with you

𓆩♡𓆪 and i can imagine that being the EXACT sort of literature he reads too??

𓆩♡𓆪 like classics and horror.. and maybe mystery or fantasy too?? but horror n classics are probs his bread n butter

𓆩♡𓆪 yeah i don't really imagine akaashi being a self-help kinda guy or someone who is into those action mangas

𓆩♡𓆪 OMG y'all defo had a meet-cute in the library/bookstore where you reached for the some book

𓆩♡𓆪 and it's so funny bc you were probably both reaching for the same psych horror book and are blushing and stuttering messes and can't even look at each other because your hands almost touched

𓆩♡𓆪 literally being so cute and bashful meanwhile the book you were both reaching for is titled smth crazy like 'the graphic and grusome dismembering of gummy bears in the forest'

𓆩♡𓆪 yes that is how i imagine all psych horror book titled LMAO

𓆩♡𓆪 but yes , that is your meet-cute :3

𓆩♡𓆪 OR maybe you're reading your book at the store/library and akaashi notices bc it's one of his faves n approaches you

𓆩♡𓆪 or vice versa were you approach him

𓆩♡𓆪 although if you were the one to make the first move he'd literally be internally screaming and be sooo flustered

𓆩♡𓆪 just bc like your beauty has caught him off-guard

𓆩♡𓆪 however if he makes the first move at least he has had time to mentally prepare beforehand

𓆩♡𓆪 he is not well versed in the art of talking to baddies okay ?? 😞

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

'my love language is acts of service, both from me and from my partner.'

𓆩♡𓆪 tbh this is soooo akaashi coded

𓆩♡𓆪 maybe bc he knows you have a similar taste in books to him, he'd take on the secondary love language of gift giving (like letting you borrow/keep some of the books he has or just buying you some that you've mentioned wanting or that he thinks you'd enjoy)

𓆩♡𓆪 as for words of affirmation, especially early on in the relationship, he probably struggles ot give you compliments in person beyond 'you look nice' because whenever he sees you he is just at a loss for words

𓆩♡𓆪 so to combat that , he would start writing cute messages and slipping them in the books you read

𓆩♡𓆪 he'd try to put then with your book mark but sometimes when he's feeling playful and mischievious he'll put them at a random page

𓆩♡𓆪 so you'll just be reading a book on the bus/before you go to bed then all of a sudden find a note from akaashi with the most eloquent , well-written and sincere compliment you've ever heard

𓆩♡𓆪 he really does have a way with words sometimes

𓆩♡𓆪 then you'll text him like 'omg akaashi you are the sweetest 🥺'

𓆩♡𓆪 however he put that note in your book like.. a week ago .. so he is just like 'i am???'

𓆩♡𓆪 as for acts of service, he's the type to carry your bags , even if you don't think they are too heavy

𓆩♡𓆪 always will drive you places if you need him too , obviously he has important work commitment n stuff but if he's free n able, he will drive you where ever you want to go in a heard beat even if you can drive yourself

𓆩♡𓆪 ESPECIALLY IF IT'S NIGHT

𓆩♡𓆪 bro forgets how to act normal as soon as the sun comes down

𓆩♡𓆪 like if y'all have gone on a date and it's finished at 8 and maybe the sun hasn't even fully gone down yet but it's in the middle of setting

𓆩♡𓆪 he will INSIST on walking you home , or walking you to your car

𓆩♡𓆪 and let's say this is the first date and you say you don't want him to walk you home bc you don't want him to know where you live, he will order you a taxi and wait with you until it arrives

𓆩♡𓆪 and insist you text him when you get home

𓆩♡𓆪 you may think of it as being overprotective, and maybe it's all the horror he's read getting to his head, but akaashi knows how unsafe it is at night time, especially for women and he'd be damned if anything happened to you

𓆩♡𓆪 so waiting with you and staying by your side is the least he can do in his eyes

𓆩♡𓆪 he doesn't even really see it as doing you a favour bc he's benefitting from it too?? like he gets to spend more time with you on the walk / car ride home so why not :)

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

for @veggiesoupdumpling: hmm tbh akaashi is the first person i thought of for you ??? soulmate energy??? but if i had to say a different character, it would probably be ushijima

[celebrityskinz]

(callum turner,  cisman,  he/him)  ⎯ leopold “leo” pembroke has  been  a  resident  of  roseton  for the entirety of his living years.  around  the  town ,  the  thirty-four  year  old head of pembroke security firm  has  been  given  the  nickname,  the wiseacre .  i  think  it's  because  they  are eloquent ,  but  also  condescending .  echo  is  said  to  know  that  ! [ glasses, dark academia, loser bf ] 

FULL NAME   LEOPOLD " LEO" PEMBROKE. NICKNAME(S) LEO. AGE   THIRTY-FOUR. GENDER  CIS-MAN. PRONOUNS   HE/HIM. SEXUALITY   HETRO-SEXUAL.

PLACE  OF  BIRTH   ROSETON, MA.

OCCUPATION   HEAD OF PEMBROKE SECURITY FIRM.

EYES   BLUE.

HEIGHT   6’2.

BUILD   LEAN & LANKY.

WARDROBE LEO DRESSES WITH SOPHISTICATION YET CASUALNESS, HIS GLASSES IS ALMOST ALWAYS ON HIS FACE WHILE THE TONES HE WEARS ARE NEUTRAL.

SPEECH  +  CADENCE   DEEP VELVET TONE.

 BIO

leo, born and raised at the eldest pembroke son, he was always destined to be, that guy.

the last name leo and his family carries a family history that runs deep within roseton's own history when it comes to the conversation of the founding of roseton, ma.

growing up, he surprised his peers, peers who weren't on him and his family level, they'd find him hanging out with them more than most of his family's inner circles and he wasn't a bully, not a on-purpose bully because of his lifestyle.

despite the pressure of the family name, leo's large family is loving as ever and welcoming which can be surprising to residents every day on how lucky they are to have founding family who genuinely isn't evil to the bone, seemingly.

everyone except for his mom, she's just a no-nonsense woman and pretty much runs the family and gathers them together real quick if they're stepping out of the family's line, after all it's leo's father that took his mother's family name.

it was leo's own decision to invest into the town's security firm, give it up for mr. ceo.

PERSONA.

not the rich asshole who will tell you he's better than you directly but will talk your ear off and make it seem like he's better than you.

leo doesn't outcast anyone who happens to be not on the same level of wealth he has, he literally operates like it's his duty to prove how well-educated and how non-delinquent he is, due to ppl's conception on the wealthy eldest sons of big name families.

truly goes above and beyond to contribute to helping out the residents of roseton, which can mostly be overwhelming for some honestly.

there's no doubt of his attractiveness but when he talks, he sometimes ruin it for himself as he rambles on.

when he's drink, he becomes a clingy mess.

so in his sober state, he's not really a physical type of person because it never really works out for him, his history of relationships have all concluded with him feeling played every single time.

he's if stiles stilinski, deadpool, and bruce wayne had a child.

an adventurer, you can quite literally catch him in every spot in town.

isn't opposed to having a partner who either overshadows, matches, or doesn't match his wealth.

doesn't seem like it most of the time, but he wears his heart on his sleeves, i'm talking about his vulnerable emotions, bcz most of the time, he's being a sarcastic bum.

WANTED CONNECTIONS.

cousinnn or (s).

aunts and uncles. the family is big with traditional big lavish holiday dinners and such.

genuine friends he has from his family connections with other families.

someone who's a native or even new to town that he has what will be now a long-standing rivalry with, i'm talking real annoyed about this person's existence and vice versa, but then they actually start to give us slow-burn friends?

could have an adopted additional sibling.

boy bestfriend, ride or die, duo that runs the town in a chaotic sense but also helps the town with his security firm and the other occupation that his best friend takes on. these two together, spongebob and patrick type of dynamic.

exes.

this is what I have for now but give this a like so we can come up with something or talk about something that's not on the list so far <3

[privatelife]

not to be too online this is gonna read so embarrassing but my sibling wasnt available so i cant talk to them abt it lol

but ive been in a terrible mood all day bc sometimes RARELY i try to interact with my moots on various websites just little comments here and there. i dont do it nearly enough im very isolated in life and online but if i feel the need, i like to just say a couple words, yknow, human interaction. like if we follow each other i figure it's cool to engage in small ways ? anyway a twitter mutual hornyposted abt d*vid h*ward thr*nton and i thought it was funny and agreeable so i replied "REAL" i didnt think anything of it. i wouldnt have even given it a second thought if she ignored it entirely i was literally just taking a break from work scrolling twitter whatever not serious. but she responded almost immediately "i dont share..." and that was it. so then ive felt all day like i did something stupid and wrong lmao I KNOW IT'S SO UNSERIOUS she couldve been joking for all i know. but we've interacted maybe once before so i cant even tell. i kinda dont think she was joking tho 😭

if i may psychoanalyze myself for a second i think this tiny interaction triggered my rejection sensitive dysphoria real bad cause it like reinforced my idea that there's just something inherently wrong and unlikable abt me and that i shouldnt even bother interacting with other ppl. im at a point where i dont really believe that so much anymore but i still would like to feel "accepted" by cool ppl with similar interests to mine someday lol. i have one (1) real friend now and that's positively effected my view of myself immensely BUT we don't share a lot of the same interests so it's like, i can talk all day long abt certain things that are important to me and they'll gladly listen, but they don't get it the way others might. and vice versa! i love them dearly and wouldnt trade them for the world but i do at the same time wish i had Other friends who are into idk. horror movies, b movies, the music i like etc. you know. i think that's a perfectly normal thing to long for 😭 it seems like every time i reach out for that it never ever works in my favor :( ive mostly accepted im a weirdo with weirdo interests nobody gets me im too cool whatever blah fart sound... but why cant we all be weirdos TOGETHER. wheres the CAMARADERIE

i suppose a therapist would say keep trying! you're doing great! but oof it just really left my brain in tatters for the day. over something so dumb !!!! stupid and dumb !!! anyway at the end of the day i still can, should, must, and will fuck the clown man.

[redysetdare]

As another non-split aroace, you're so correct for saying that we're treated as the punching bags of both aro and ace communities. Like if y'all can accept and support straight aros and aces but are hostile towards aroaces, you're just aphobic. Yes even if you're aro/ace yourself. Aro spaces nowadays literally have the same attitude towards aroaces that exclusionists used to have towards asexuals, that we're weird freaks bringing purity culture into their "safe" communities just by existing and therefore need to be pushed out. And ace spaces still act like we're the bad guys and need to be pushed out of their "safe" communities because we can't romantically love other people, which makes us heartless monsters apparently. It's just exhausting. I've never seen aroaces being so hostile towards non-ace aros and non-aro aces, we're always trying to uplift their voices and bring awareness to their issues. But the moment we try to talk about our own issues in aromantic or asexual spaces we're told to shut up and let them speak over us because we somehow have it better than them. Not to mention the pressure to split your experiences into aro vs ace and prioritise one part of your identity over the other if you want to be taken seriously in those spaces. Like sorry but for some of us our aroaceness is interwined not split. But we're still aros and aces, still a part of your community. Stop trying to push us out of our own communities on the basis of aphobic stereotypes.

Honestly I've been kinda biting my tongue on it for a while because I understand why Aro and Ace ppl have been trying to separate the communities. it can be frustrating to constantly be paired with an identity that you don't relate to - but i feel like so many ppl have taken it way to far. They've taken the relatively understandable stance of "Aromantic and Asexual are not the same identity" and pushed it to the extreme of "Aro and Ace are so completely different they have nothing in common and NO overlap" and the worst part is i don't think anyone has particularly noticed.

Idk I was most active in the aro and ace communities when we still kinda shared communities. the idea that aro and ace were separate was still a thing (hell, aroaces were the ones helping to push that distinction. we wanted people to recognize our aro identities too, yknow.) but we recognized the overlap and similarities and supported each other... now it just feels like im seeing post after post reminding people not every aro or ace person is aroace and that people shouldt tag aro posts as ace and vice versa and "no ace people cant relate to aro experiences" "no aro people cant relate to ace experiences" because "They are so different they are completely not the same and don't have any overlapping problems at all" and as an aroace it sucks!

it sucks feeling forgotten in my own communities.

It's almost feeling like they are blaming us for there being this idea that people are are Ace must also be aro and people who are aro must also be ace. Like they know they cant get mad at the allos so they get mad at aroaces and act like we are the reason allos think this way. It's like aroaceness is only brought up to talk about how "Not everyone is aroace" or "aroace characters are so much more prevalent in media (Proceeds to only talk about ace characters)" or how aroace ppl must have an identity that means more to them - how their aro or ace identity must be more important or effect them more because they can't possibly intertwined and overlap and "hey you tagged your post with aro and ace tags but obviously its only about aromanticism/only about asexuality so remove some of those tags because it's annoying me" or worse I see aromantics being acephobic or asexuals being arophobic and it's like.... where do i fit in?

people think aroace ppl ran both communities as 1 community and they say it was bad and that we need to separate - but from my perspective it was two communities who worked together. the only difference now is that aroace ppl are getting pushed to the side. thrown under the bus. "you dont need rep you have tons of rep. society loves giving aroace rep!" and "not everyone is aroace. you're experience isn't universal and so you shouldn't talk about it" Aroace voices just got smaller. we got quieter. because our own communities decided we were privileged. we were more accepted than they were. or worse that we were actually the real freaks for not feeling both sexual and romantic attraction. we weren't palatable enough - there was nothing that could be used to normalize us. and besides, it was easier to just only fight for one set of rights, right?

and part of me understands it. it sucks. it sucks to always be a footnote. but guess what - aro and aces and aroaces are footnotes of the queer community. we're stuck here together and instead we're fighting over who's the more important footnote. we are all in the same boat and we're acting like we're not and trying to sink the ship forgetting we're all on it together.

[colgatebluemintygel]

sorry I’m all up ur notifs rn but thought this should be a separate ask - in ur response to my previous ask you mentioned that remus has this air of vulnerability to him which is part of what draws ppl in, and I’m curious whether u feel that that vulnerability is outwardly visible (to other characters I mean) in OAO? Or rather, clearly it is since u mentioned it in this context lol, but I’m curious how that shows through (or if it’s just his vibes)? Since we (so far!) only rlly see him through Sirius’s unreliable narration and he obv knows Remus so well but also describes him as rlly hard to read and hard to get him to show vulnerability, and I’m curious now if that’s something about Remus that’s clear to everyone (which might be what ur referring to about him being mysterious) or something Sirius sees bc he knows Remus so well - I guess I’m intrigued that ppl seem to pick up on his vulnerability when it seems like he’s working so hard to hide his emotions in order to avoid seeming vulnerable, yk? He’s such a fascinating character lol (I am just like everyone in the club fr)

PS. this is how I’m picturing the sandals, except with the leather even more beat up and cracked:

(PPS If there’s any way you’d be willing to share where we’re up to in the OAO playlist in terms of chapters/events………finding out the Remus POV was next totally upended my personal theories about which songs were part of his POV lol so I’m v curious)

omg never apologise!!! i literally love talking about them <333 SO YES i think in part the vulnerability comes through in his general appearance; sirius is constantly waxing lyrical about how sexy and beautiful remus is, but he's also this bird boned man who looks like he lives off porridge (aka the only thing he knows how to cook) and cigarettes. he has perma eye bags and always looks a bit sleepy. yes, he FUCKS but he could also do with a protein smoothie if ya feel me. sirius's very first impression of remus was that he looked like a well-loved teddy. comforting, but also something to be treasured and protected.

i do think a huge part of the draw for people towards him is his almost contradictory nature; on one hand, he's so very kind and gives off strong sensitive guy vibes (in the same way that all tall spindly men reading beaten up books on the bus do), but he's also elusive af. and i really think this combination of traits makes people go wild; it's like a tease. like you KNOW there is so much there under the surface, but it's all being kept tightly under wraps,, and people can't help but fall for that. they want to be the one to uncover it all! added to that, he's always willing to lend an ear to other people and their problems, but he becomes v dodgy when it comes to talking about himself. sirius always feels guilty for taking up room with his feelings, and definitely part of that (not that sirius realises) is remus using sirius's feelings as a bit of a buffer for his own. if that makes sense? he's not being intentionally manipulative, but he feels like his own feelings are a burden; i think tied to that is a desire to make sure that nobody else around him feels like a burden for their feelings, but also a desire to just feel useful.

also, what will be made particularly evident in the next chapter ;-) is that remus controls himself A Lot around sirius. more than anyone else. around sirius, he's both the most himself and at his absolute most vulnerable, and that combination absolutely terrifies him. and he works overtime to try and keep himself under control. it doesn't help that sirius always finds a way to slip under remus's defenses, so he always tries extra extra hard to guard against that. but sirius always finds ways of surprising him (and vice versa)!

anywho..... i think the essence of what i'm trying to say here is: at his core, remus is incredibly vulnerable, and he works overtime to try to negate that. but!!! we will see some of those walls fall... :-) eventually :-))))

YES YOU GET IT. THOSE ARE HIS SANDALS. THEY LOOK LIKE THEY'RE FALLING OFF HIS FEET !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAKEN FROM THE GRAVE OF AN OLD WELSH SHEEP FARMER. DUG UP AT AN ARCHAEOLOGICAL SITE AND PLACED DIRECTLY IN REMUS'S HANDS. THAT IS THE VIBE !!!!!!

oooh yes of course <333 remus's songs are house of cards - half the day is the night ;o)))))

[silkgonerough]

Astro Observation/Rants #3 (includes moral support for ppl with harsh aspects between their big 3)

🍰UNDERRATED ASPECT COMBO: Mercury sextile venus + mars when I tell you the amount of crazy situations I’ve talked my way out of and the amount of free things I’ve talked my way into is simply ridiculous.. The mixture of both I think gives someone a rlly nice and sweet way of talking but with a certain tact and persuasion with how their saying it if that makes sense? Which equals a real charmer in words but also someone very skilled in how to get what they want through what their saying. If you have this as well start using it to your advantage trust me it works!!!

☹️Does anyone else who has Pluto or Saturn on or aspecting the ascendant in a harsh aspect have an intense self awareness that kind of keeps them from doing certain things bc it gets to much be too much or you get too paranoid over what others will think of you?

😪Being a Sagittarius but with Saturn as my dominant/elevated planet is really not what I signed up for... I thought I was getting my fun carefree casual storyline but Saturn said it’s the struggle for me. RIP to young me who only looked at cookbook astrology and rlly thought I was doing something...

🙃Ppl who have their sun or ascendant squaring your own ascendant usually have habits or just certain things they do that tend to annoy you or make you judgemental in how they present themselves to the world and others around them. My virgo rising squares my moms sagittarius sun and I can’t take her anywhere 😕

🥵Venus square mars is so hot yet such a disaster in synastry😭 like maybe it’s because I attract relationships that tend to be as messy as something out of a Netflix original but I’m always so attracted to guys who’s venus’ square my mars... and then they open their mouths😪

📚If you know someone with mercury in an aspect to saturn compliment their intellect, writting skills or just knowledge in general!! Ppl with this aspect tend to feel insecure with being considered “smart” even if they really are! Most ppl I’ve met are able to articulate their thoughts rlly well and are like walking dictionaries almost? They way they talk when explaining definitions or concepts is also lowkey hot🥵maybe that’s just my Virgo rising talking tho...

💖Sun in any aspect to venus but especially the conjunct/trine as an aspect between two people is the official hype man aspect!! The venus person hypes the hell out of the sun person and vice versa!! Probs the loyal fan who’s always in your comment section😘I love this aspect sm tho you just love the entire being of the other person! one of my fave celebrities has her venus conjunct my sun and I am deeply in love with her🤪

😩WHEN WILL THE UNIVERSE GIVE ME ANYTHING OTHER THEN A DAMN PISCES ARIES OR LIBRA MAN ITS GETTING OLD give me my Scorpio or Capricorn man😭🙏 (except dont bc all of hell will break loose and it’ll be me invigoratingly opening the gates)

🌗If you have your sun in a harsh aspect to your moon (square or opposite) your childhood was probably not the most fun in the home life and you probably understood the harsh reality of marriage or just unhealthy relationships in general from the parents :/ the whole sun/moon inner conflict was also probs pretty prevalent and caused social issues with peers at school.. honestly such a sad aspect to have as a child bc everything’s so hard and you don’t understand why bc you don’t rlly understand yourself yet :( but once you grow into it and figure out how to balance your emotions/moon to your overall personality/sun one can become the strength where the other is weak and it creates a sort of wondrous enigma of a person and ppl can become rlly entranced in your personality! It’s called layers bitch😜

🤫Scorpio/Pluto in the 3rd house (I have both🤗) could be someone who has a lot of secretive hobbies or interests that they don’t share with a lot of ppl but may have a secret social media accounts for them👀 not the type to tell ppl if they like someone but the ppl who are close to them will catch on or honestly figure out just by asking them straight up bc once confronted we get all embarrassed and you can see it on our faces super easily! We love our mysteries, plot twist or literally anything that requires digging deeper or making theories when reading or watching something. No surface level shit here🙅‍♀️

💸Mars in 2nd house may have a shopping addiction or may be bad at saving money. They usually binge shop and are the types that went to a grocery store for more untensils and came back with a waffle maker and a bunch of baking supplies😅 stingy if you eat their food without permission... the type to freak out if they left their fave shirt at their friends house after a sleepover lol, probs has a thing for food and sex together or sex in a really luxurious place with candles and rose petals.. it’s go big or I’m going tf home with them. Have furniture in ur home their not fucking in a god damn roller rink🤣

🌟People with Mercury in Aquarius/aspecting Uranus seem to really like talking about scientific theories or futuristic concepts!! All the ones I’ve known have had really grand ideas and seem to like anything related to the mystical but also seemingly holds a lot of innovative undertones! One of my friends who has Mercury in Aquarius aspecting Neptune/Uranus has a thing for the Disney short films which honestly is like a mix of neptune and uranus in its art forms! I’ve always thought it was cute how eager she is to show me them☺️

🌊From what I’ve observed an aspect that can make someone kind of bad at confrontation or like vocalizing their feelings until it’s too late and their bursting like a freaking geyser is Pisces mars. It doesn’t rlly take a lot to have them feeling some sort of way either with or without a valid reason (this is just an observation from the ones I’ve seen I don’t want to generalize!!) but the way they get angry is like a baby’s tempter tantrum and because I’m a Sagittarius I can always see thru the bullshit and I’m like is anyone else seeing this? I think overall besides Scorpio having a water mars signs is exceptionally hard so I cut them some slack but at what cost😫

🤤Mars conjunct Jupiter people are yummy. The men and women both are so hot and the men are always exuding big dick energy and usually thats what their giving👀

🌎All my big 3 create harsh aspects to one another (sun square moon, moon opposite ascendant, ascendant square sun) I honestly don’t know how I made it this far without literally exploding from tension but to anyone with these I guess my advice would be to refrain from taking things too personally bc it’s usually never that serious we’re just already a bit insecure in ourselves and how we present ourselves to the world! Your perception of how others view you vs how they actually do are usually very different in a good way but we tend to self sabotage ourselves into acting the way we think others want us to! I think having so many conflictive yet different sides of yourself creates a very influential character. It’s kind of like living in many completely different places throughout your life. The change is always hard and you don’t always feel secure but your experience and perception on things are really unique and you can offer other ppl a whole new perspective on who they are bc you yourself are always looking through the world through conflicting yet contrasting lenses.

[elftwink]

i’ll be the first to say that fic readers/writers often make completely wild claims about the quality of fanfiction overall but also it’s very weird that we’ve looped back around to the “inherently bad” argument wherein someone will literally just say “fanfiction can be good sometimes” and some of u start frothing at the mouth talking about how it makes you a worse writer and it could never possibly be as good as published books etc etc and it’s like... why are you so bent out of shape at the idea that someone can be a good writer and also use that talent to write something you consider kind of silly or wasteful. obviously there are bad fics; that’s what happens when anyone can publish anything at any level of skill and any point in the process. but just like law of large numbers some of those pieces of writing are going to be at least decent and if you haven’t found any that kinda sounds like a you problem

also while i fully agree that if you think you dislike published books you probably just don’t know how to look for what you like to read it is true that sometimes shitty books get published by bad writers who suck (at writing, not just generally) and that almost certainly there are good fics better than bad books. and frankly even the idea of trying to do a large scale comparison between the two (to claim that all or even most books are better than all or most fics, AND vice versa) is laughable because like... based on what? how you personally feel about the works? newsflash, that’s the same thing that the ppl claiming fics are better than books are doing! why are you trying to make an objective statement about the overall quality (already subjective even for individual works) of literally millions of creative works. you sound exactly as dumb as the ppl you are attempting to criticize. at best you could claim that published books are more likely to be good quality in terms of polish because they go through an editing process before they are in front of you and you see less works by total amateurs but u aren’t claiming that. u are trying to claim that by virtue of being fanfiction, it makes a work poorly written. you don’t have to like fanfiction but your taste doesn’t actually mean anything to anybody but you and im certainly not going to accept that all fics are inherently trash bc some blogger on tumblr dot edu personally dislikes them and stated that as a fact instead of as their own opinion. which is what it is.

if you wanna be a hater that’s fine and i support that but then just admit to being a hater instead of trying to find a way in which you’re objectively right. like just say you dislike fanfiction. a true hater would just hate shit without needing to justify it.

[scandeniall]

story of us

pairing: suna x reader

the story of ur relationship <3; alternatively (more) dating sunarin headcanons but this time is somewhat of an order and talks good and bad 2K+ worth lol

a/n: i had more planned but half of these have been sitting in my notes for months and its kinda fucking long already bc he lives rent free!!!

warnings: uh the usual aged up (in ur 20s time skip type beat), language, yeah

Meeting

Now when y’all met suna was not looking to love at all. That man was just living his life and so where you. The two of you pretty much meet through komori. You’re a friend and it’s his birthday so him and a few of his friends go out for drinks bc why not. Young hot pretty financially stable v-ball players. Nah no ones there for any type of hookups literally just there celebrating a great guy.

They rent out a section at a relatively nice bar tbh. Not the cheapest and you can actually hear conversation. But also not a super expensive one where the patrons are middle aged with jazz music and the occasional track to relive “youth.” Komori’s a sweetie and will come outside to get you when you text that you’re there. You’ve met washio and ofc sakusa Before so you greet them casually then you turn and there’s Suna and a few others you haven’t met.

That greeting isn’t anything special I promise. Just “hey I’m so and so” and vice versa. It’s one of those meetings where you just think “he’s cute” but it’s such a fleeting thought. Y’all don’t even really talk that first night tbh. At the next practice Suna mentions offhandedly that he didn’t know komori was dating someone and komori is like: huh? Yeah sorry. I love (Y/N) and all but were just friends. Suna just shrugs not really caring to be honest until Komori just asks what did he think of you.

“Don’t really remember much man. Seemed cool though” he didn’t think he’d really see you again. Yeah you were close enough to have been at Komori’s birthday but if that was his first time ever meeting you, he figured you weren’t from around there are present very much. Yeah he was wrong.

Suddenly you were on Komori’s snap story more often, or maybe he’d just been noticing more. Too bad he couldn’t even remember your name 💀. Then it turned into you occasionally popping up where he was. He’d been told your name at least 5 times already but wouldn’t remember it the next day. Whenever he’d see you again he’d get a strained look like: “what is this mf name again” just laugh and tell him again bby.

That changed at some random house party by another mutual friend you two apparently had? You two were the only people just around the fire pit trying to catch some warmth in the chilly night. He’s probably just on his phone head bobbing his head to the muffled music from inside. And you’re just like “remember my name yet?” All jokingly. This sparks the tiniest bit of interest in him and he lets out a low chuckle and just admits “not at all.” I also feel like this is the first time he really looks at you and he’s like 🤨, wait you’re actually kinda cute.

That night y’all just kinda talk and vibe. The conversation comes easy as you two jump back and forth from talking about the music playing to sneakers which he brings up to stuff that you like. He’s actually really easy to talk to. So easy that u can forget about him not remembering your name despite meeting several times. You mention that you’d hung around komori before while they were gaming and that he seemed pretty cool. That leads him to asking “how do you know him anyways?”

“I used to date Sakusa”

Mentally he’s just like— ‘yeah I’m not getting involved in this. Time to go.’ Until you just start laughing.

“I’m kidding. He’s not really my type. We met after being paired together for a project in school.”

The two of you spend quite a bit of time just talking that night until you are joined again by some friends and it’s deadass like y’all weren’t just talking for almost an hour straight.

Getting Together

The process of getting together is like a cat and mouse game. You two start getting closer than friends and then something happens and you’re not talking for weeks. Whether it be life just getting busy, and then someone ending up on some random tinder date or so be it. Definitely one of those things were somehow someway y’all end up just hanging on one of your couches watching a movie. At some point there’s definitely a hint of sexual tension but neither of y’all act on it (later on you find on his finsta that he used to post several “i wont you 😔” memes  Folks can’t tell if hes joking or not (hes not))

You probably gotta tell that man you like him so if that ain’t you I’m sorry. Y’all not dating 😹. It’s something casual, y’all going to pick up some snacks for a movie night and why this mf keep looking at you out the side of his eyes instead of the road. You def texting the groupchat asking if you should confess. They tell you to boss up and just do it baby.

You literally end up confessing in that parking lot. Like right when he shuts the car off and starts swinging his keys on his finger and you kinda just blurt “I like you. Like like you.” He just kinda nods before his eyes widen. “Wait are you fr?” Like no you’re joking tf. It gets a lil awkward so you just go to get out the car and he’s like “I like like you too.”

I definitely don’t think either of you ever officially asked the other out it’s just at some point the understanding that you two are a couple. Like when you’re hanging out just you two hes more touchy, and then y’all start kissing and holding hands at some point. Then when you’re with friends he almost exclusively sits next to you and your friends notice the whispers in one another’s ears at the loud bar that seem just a hint too intimate for ppl who are just friends. Then y’all start arriving and leaving places together and people just at some point get the message (it’s later confirmed by you tweeting some shit like: I hate Rin why is that mf my boyfriend)

As far as anniversaries y’all draw straws to pick a day in the ballpark of the time y’all both think you became official. That’s the day you stick with even if it’s not true.

Relationship Flaws

A fault in the relationship is sunas kinda poor communication when it comes to things that matter. How he feels. Arguments. Love sure as hell don’t come east with anyone but when your partner won’t let you in? Yeah that’s like hell. That’s something you struggle with. And then on your end, it’s the impatience with him not letting you in. You try to wrongfully rush it.

 There’s definitely been arguments that stem from him just being upset about something unrelated to the relationship then coming to you for comfort without actually telling you what’s wrong. He kinda just wants to lay with his head on his chest but at some point that’s not enough. Y’all are in a relationship and should be able to talk about your bad days too.

You’re not innocent in this issue either because sometimes it comes off too pushy. Yes it’s from a place of care but sometimes that silent comfort is necessary. The walls will break in due time and y’all both know that deep in the back of your minds But then there’s a part that’s like— yeah we can’t let this become the norm

“Rin, can you please talk to me”

He will have literally told you “whatever” and that he “can’t deal with this rn” several times as he just shrugs and is like yeah “I’m gonna just go home. I’ll text you later” with an awkward ass pat on your shoulder if it really ruined his mood. If he’s leaving before he gets super upset and uncomfortable just some half assed kiss in your cheek

Another thing is I feel like he could be passive aggressive and let’s be real other folks doing it causes you to do it to. Y’all probably drag eachother on your finstas where you can both see it lol

But when it comes to making up he cracks first and apologizes when he started it. Or as y’all get more comfy with communication. If it’s not anything major he’ll just hit you with a text like “I’m bored come hang”

More Relationship Things

I feel like he love/hates driving. Likes the ride not always driving though. So if you ever proposed a late night drive he’d be down (if you offer to drive). He does let y’all take his car though. He reclines the seat pretty far back. Alternates between just closing his eyes vibing w/ the music or kinda just looking at you (he the type of bf that makes u nervous no matter how long y’all been together)The way he looks at you makes you nervous cause that man is fine as hell and you can just feel his eyes on you.

He films you on Snapchat and sends the video to you like “you look hot”

If he’s not ‘resting his eyes’ he’s mumbling along to the music because he has the aux. if y’all music tastes are different he occasionally throws in something you really like bc he likes how you perk up at one of your fav songs

Moving on. Y’all dap eachother up after s3x because it’s “modern romance” (boy stfu). You two came up with a sex playlist together and it’s on both of your phones. Sometimes one of you will add a troll song that the other doesn’t know and put it in the lineup. (Stole my heart by 1D has definitely played before and you were practically in tears laughing at his reaction. That was one of those songs he was like ‘yeah alright i think we’re done).

At some point you two develop your own handshake and it’s cute. Whenever either of you have to travel without the other that’s always the last thing you do before you leave eachother. There’s vids of your friends daring y’all to do your elaborate ass handshake drunk and doesn’t matter what’s in your system, you both know it like the back of your hand.

I think he values quality time a lot so there’s so many nights where you’re both just chilling in his room just doing your own things. He could just be at his desk watching some game highlights and you’re just doing hw on his bed with your own earbuds in work all spread out and he’s content. He’s also attentive so if he calculates that you’ve been working too long he’ll just take ur earbud like “hey let’s go get something to eat.”

People definitely think he’s the lazy one in the relationship but it’s 100% not true. Like stated above, he’s very attentive and can pretty much gauge how you’re feeling in the blink of an eye. He knows when you need alone time but won’t go without reassuring you that he’s here whenever you’re ready. When you do just need him he’s there without a second thought. If you’re more touchy he’ll have your head in his lap his arm running up and down your as you tell him what’s wrong. He knows when to joke about a minor inconvenience and over the course of your relationship knows when to cut the jokes and be serious with you.

He’d never admit it but he knows your coffee order by heart (he keeps up his image my asking wtf do you get everytime. Just let him LOL). He the type to peek at what you plan on wearing and ‘accidentally’ color coordinate then pull some shit like “why are you copying me”

Y’all def shit talk together. See someone doing something completely out of pocket in public— straight to ur phones you go (pack it up shade room). To the public it just looks like you aren’t paying any attention to one another on your dates but y’all are. Just over the phone so u don’t piss off ur target 😌

Y’all are very comfy in your relationship that you just say stuff. Y’all don’t even think.

“Rin, what if i crashed us in this car rn 😹”

“Do it. Might be fun”

When you two finally move in together it’s almost like how your relationship starts. Slowly more and more spares of stuff for you end up at his. He does sorta make the move near the end of your lease and is just like “you’re here more than me anyways.” (hes nervous but swears he’s not. Bby you’re literally shaking). Him moving you in is like hell. This mf takes sooooo long to help with boxes. Picks up 1 then sits for like 15 minutes. You ask for help the first few times and he’s just like “I got you” while continuing to scroll his phone.

Sleepy Shoulder kisses in the mornings. Only form a greeting you get but it’s ok

this is like my 100th dating suna hc and im still going this is SICK. it was so hard to not drop old refs bc i still believe in them 100% yes i do!!!!

[angeltrapz]

hhmmmmvnfj asks abt Lawrence? umm in a selfship way: what’s ur favorite gift he’s gotten u? — in a character analysis way, bcuz I’ve posted a lil abt it n u mentioned it in DMs too: if William had survived, bc Lawrence was handling new disciples at that time (like Brad n Ryan), how do u think Lawrence n William would’ve interacted? (esp bc we know William was at least vaguely aware of who Lawrence was pre-trap bc of their connections to John)

dfhskj thank u!!! finally getting 2 this

okay fr the selfship part: mentioned it a little bit when replying 2 the other ask u sent, but it’s a worry stone made out of rhodonite (which looks a lil like this), bc he knows how interested I am in gems + rocks n stuff like that but also bc he wanted me to have smth to fidget with in case I forgot my lil lanyard of rolling beads when we went somewhere! it’s smth I just run my thumb along bc it’s smooth n soft n fits perfectly in the palm of my hand. a lot of times if I’m in an uncomfortable situation I can’t get out of, having that w me helps a lot bc it’s grounding n it reminds me of him 💞💞

fr the character analysis part: KJSKFS YEAH I love getting 2 talk abt that bc I actually think abt it quite a bit. as u said, William and Lawrence have always been vaguely aware of each other on account of being connected thru their interactions w John, the doctor who he felt wasn’t kind/sympathetic enough n the insurance agent who denied his (EXTREMELY experimental, mind u) foreign treatment request. I’m not sure that they ever interacted face-to-face PRIOR to John’s death, but after William survives his test it’s just kinda like... who else does he have 2 talk to that might be able to understand even the tiniest bit what he went thru? he loves Pamela to pieces, of course he does, she’s his only family - but she didn’t see what he’d had to do, doesn’t rly KNOW like Lawrence would.

but I still think he’d absolutely be Cautious, bc even w the desire to be understood n maybe even have someone he could confide in, William knows now that Lawrence has been helping John for quite some time - as we see in 3D and as u said, Lawrence is the one handling new disciples, something that only John ever did; Amanda didn’t have her own apprentices, n Hoffman sure as hell didn’t either. that, n William doesn’t know how much involvement, if any, Lawrence had w his own test - that’s smth that wld haunt him a lil, I think. it’s hard to be comfortable around a person who is not only directly involved w the person who felt it necessary to put u in a trap, but who Also may have been the one to put fucking explosive bracelets/anklets n tattoos on u + SEWN A KEY inside of u, which is INCREDIBLY violating of his bodily autonomy. that could warrant a whole discussion of its own tbh.

but. Lawrence is the closest John ever got 2 having a TRUE successor (which I have conflicting feelings on; my reading of Lawrence in SAW 2004 was not someone who wld have joined up w someone who caused him so much pain, but fr the sake of exploring this, I think tht after going thru something as horribly traumatizing and irreversibly changing as he did, he sought that life of control n routine that he felt he had prior to his game, and well, John could certainly provide that,,,) n William would likely know this. Amanda’s dead, Logan is off doing who knows what n living his life, Hoffman is only doing it out of a weird sense of obligation?, and Jill isn’t rly a disciple, just some1 who’s been dragged into it too. (I think William n Jill actually would’ve gotten along tbh,, it’s a different thing entirely whether William would WANT to interact w her.)

I think Lawrence wld want to be able to reassure William that he had no hand in what happened to him (I don’t even know if Lawrence is the one who fitted the bracelets/did the key?), but he like. wouldn’t even know where 2 begin bc how can he explain that in a way that William could ever rely on? how could he ever convince William that he truly wasn’t responsible when all the other man wld have 2 do is look at all of th ppl he assisted John in securing/operating on? Hoffman was the one who put William in his trap, but Lawrence doesn’t know he’ll ever b able 2 prove that in a way William can believe. n I don’t think he’d expect William to believe him, not at all, but I think Lawrence at that point truly doesn’t have anyone - he and Alison are divorced and she has Diana, Adam isn’t around obviously, John + Amanda are gone, Hoffman doesn’t know he exists, so who does he have? I think he longs fr that sort of connection, even if it Is forged thru smth as terrible as what they were both individually put thru by John - they have tht common ground of being involved in his diagnosis + the way he responded to them (petty fucking grievances... kramer I will literally knock yr teeth in u fucker) n being ppl he considered partially responsible fr his downfall in a way (Lawrence wasn’t “kind enough,” William said no to a highly expensive and experimental international treatment that they weren’t even sure wld WORK). and like, not necessarily 2 the same extent, but they were both physically altered by what they went thru. Lawrence is missing his foot. William has scars + tattoos that he could get covered up, sure, but the experience isn’t going away. the scar on his side where the key was hidden is never going away. Lawrence’s prosthetic is functioning but the fact that he cut his fucking foot off isn’t going away. n that’s not even TOUCHING the lasting mental effects.

so I think William wld be feeling rly lost. he just doesn’t know what to do. he doesn’t know if he can even go back to the life he led b4 (if he does, it’s not for a very long time) n he has a hard time looking Pamela in the eye bc he feels personally responsible fr her having been there too + bc of what he’d been made to do to so many ppl. he feels alone, much more than he ever has before, n that’s saying smth bc his personal life was already extremely solitary bc he felt it was safer for him + his career. no one could possibly understand what he went thru, bc nobody saw it. nobody saw the way he tried so hard to keep every1 alive, the way he tried to help the people he worked with + CARED FOR even if he had 2 put himself thru pain to do it (holding onto those pulleys until his shoulders were almost DISLOCATED fr Addy n Allen, burning himself w the steam so Debbie could get thru the maze, the entirety of the shotgun carousel). Tara + Brent didn’t see him sacrifice himself fr his coworkers, n neither did Pamela. nobody knows. William wants some1 to connect with, n that just doesn’t seem like a possibility given that what he went thru in there is knowledge that only he himself + Hoffman carry.

but Lawrence knows. he understands n he's the one 2 kinda make that offer, to just be like “u don’t have 2 trust me right now, or even ever, but I understand n if u want some1 2 talk to, I’m here.” bc what does he have to lose? Adam is gone. Alison n Diana are gone. he’s by himself. and so is William, though he has Pamela. they’re both men who went thru smth unspeakably terrible bc a dying man wanted 2 play god n they came out of it much worse off than they ever were b4 John “helped” them. n William is just like. how much worse could it get? after Jigsaw, what could possibly be worse than what he’s already gone thru? so he’s just kind of like, “okay, we can work this out, I can’t say I trust u right now but maybe I can in the future. we can do this together. we can help each other.” n that’s how they end up meeting for coffee or breakfast/lunch/dinner every so often (coffee meets are at least weekly), n it’s just kind of like. the reassurance that some1 has seen the very worst parts of u and are still around. the relief of knowing someone sees u and knows how hard yr fighting to rebuild a life that’s been shattered into a million tiny pieces. n they’re struggling against that current together, and maybe it starts in a place of “I have no one else so I might as well chill w u,” but eventually William and Lawrence kind of fall into this uneasy friendship. they’re there for each other. William calls Lawrence when he has a nightmare that keeps him up fr hours after, shaking n w his heart beating out of his chest bc he doesn’t want to remember. Lawrence spends th night at William’s place every now n then bc he can’t be alone w his thoughts n the phantom pain in his leg just won’t quiet. they meet for coffee. they have breakfast sometimes. Lawrence has clothes n a toothbrush at William’s and vice versa. they’re in this together.

n maybe that escalates into more (which I believe wld only happen after they get 2 a point where they’ve discussed, at length, John’s legacy n who exactly would be continuing it + if anyone WLD be, n after Hoffman is “disposed of” in a sense), but even if not, they both know they Have Someone who looks at them n doesn’t see them as a monster, not the horrible person John thought he needed to “fix.” they both carry scars, both physically n mentally, frm what they went thru. they’re both struggling to get their bearings + Lawrence is still coping w what he’ll need to do after John’s (and eventually, Jill’s) passing. it won’t be easy, but they’re not walking alone. they’re wading thru the mud together, hand in hand, and fr William n Lawrence, that is enough.

[cherryonigiri]

Kuroo w/a confident + active S/O

@onedayiwillcreatecoolernickname​ asked: im a confident person, whats visible both in my looks and personality. i love standing out of the crowd, so wearing extravagant clothes and crazy hair colors is something that im well known of. but i dont have a particular aesthetic, so my clothing style is various (grunge, pastel, boho, sexy, vintage, tomboy; basically everything). even though im 170 cm tall, i like wearing high heels a lot and tbh, it doesn't make me feel awkward or insecure when i'm being taller than some boys. i often end up as a leader of the group and i think im a good one, because i have almost all the required qualities (creative patient helpful observant talkative), and every project that i take a part in is successful, so. but talking sbout ppl; i love taking care of them so much, seriously. youre cold? here, take my jacket. its getting dark already? dont worry, ill take you home. youre feeling anxious? lets talk and ill try my best to make u feel at ease. you need a hug? come here bby. as much as i enjoy discussing with other ppl, learning about their beliefs and exchanging my opinions with them, i also appreciate it a lot when we can be silent with each other, doing totally different things. but still, im happy the most when i have someone with whom i can have a deep conversation, because im not really into small talk. i need stimulation, the feeling that im constantly learning something new about everything. im just so fascinated and in love with the world haha. and maybe some facts about me. im cuddly and affectionate af with people that i like (and bcs of that other ppl that i must be in relationship with my friends, but its all platonic gay i swear). im ticlish and in general, touch-sensetive af. i identify as pansexual. i have 0 male friends, mostly because of my past bad experience with boys (bullying etc), but also because in my environment theres a lot more girls, so yeah. at home i often wear shorts and tshirts, because im quite hot ; ) im really into personal development and psychology, because people and their minds fascinate me and id want to know them better. i love learning new languages (im fluent in polish & english, less advanced in spanish and russian, but im still learning), writing both my own stories and letters, i also draw a little and i think im quite good at it. volleyball is definitely my favourite sport, but i enjoy running, cycling and matrial arts too.

A/N: Last of my matchup requests! Hope you enjoy 💖

Your matchup is

Kuroo Tetsurou

Loves that you are super confident + self-reassured. You know what you’re capable of and not afraid to assert that you’re good at what you do (he finds your confidence super attractive)

Another thing Kuroo loves about you is your undending curiousity - he loves that you always want to learn something new

Would totally flirt with you by texting/telling you fun facts about science or anything else - would pay attention to whatever you are interested at the moment and then go home and research fun facts to share with you

Enjoys studying together with you - he likes that you try to find meaning in what you’re learning + apply it outside of how to score well on exams

Studying together is something you look forward to because the two of you just being with each other - you don’t necessarily have to go out on a “formal” date to spend time with him.

You just enjoy having his presence around - since you appreciate + value silence I feel like a lot of times you would just lounge around in the house and not really do much 

That being said - you are both people who like to have things to do most of the time - so he makes the effort to take you out on regular dates 

You guys probably love going to museums + different exhibitions/galleries around the city since you both enjoy learning more about the world

Aquarium dates??? YES. 

I feel like Kuroo loves your sense of fashion/style and would love to try to coordinate outfits to match or pair well with each other. If you want he would be down to have you style him for the day

Would understand if you were uncomfortable around his friends/team at first - but hopes that you will eventually be able to get along with them 

If you are open to hanging out with/socializing with the boys’ volleyballl team he’ll be really aware of the situation/atmosphere and make sure that you aren’t uncomfortable 

If you get close with the team,yYou two probably co-parent his volleyball team - you’re probably the unofficial manager/mom of the team (sorry yaku)

Will often hold study/review sessions for his team and you always seem to have plenty of their favorite snacks/foods 

Vice versa I think Kuroo would put forth a genuine effort to get to know your friends - he is big on reciprocation and really appreciates how much time you spend getting to know his friends

Wouldn’t mind sitting with your group of friends during lunch and chatting with them - if your group of friends doesn’t mind + he isn’t intruding he’d be happy to hang out with you all on the weeekends

If you’re interested in learning Japanese he’d be more than happy to help whenever you need it. 

You’re good at getting a grasp on the basics but helps with the more complex stuff + stuff that is related to culture/history + idioms or sayings that don’t make sense when translated literally

Probably asks you to teach him English/Polish or you two decide to learn a new language together. 

Kuroo definitely is very physically affectionate (aka. Look at my cuddling hcs for him) but isn’t the biggest on PDA

He prefers just having some kind of physical contact with you - like holding your hand, arm around your waist/shoulder - occasional kisses on the cheek/pecks on the lips but nothing over the top

Would love it if you play volleyball casually with him - maybe a group of your friends + his friends together could spend a day on the beach playing volleyball together

I feel like the two of you would be a couple that likes to work out together/try new things together

Morning runs together are fun - it gives you the extra motivation + it’s a nice way to spend some time with Kuroo

[strvwberryblcnde]

👫 viktor lana :D

send a 👫 and I’ll write four headcanons i have about our muses’ relationship.

he he he he (me doing an evil little laugh tht daunts n unnerves everyone around me)..... i knew u would send this i already thought of this hc in advance when i rb’d the post. ahem. i will begin. tht time they went motel hopping n wreaking havoc bc they were both suspended from radcliffe i imagine one night a motel they got to was booked full n they’d got there rly late so they were jst like fk it let’s sleep in the car. viktor’s hearse. n if he happened to have fallen asleep first i feel like she wld have been like huh.............. he lks weirdly peaceful when he sleeps almost like he doesn’t wna bite the whole world into tiny little pieces fr once. she’d feel like she ws sighting a rare exotic bird in the wild like it ws some special privilege i think she’d smile to herself abt it like a loser. n lana is literally so physically affectionate she’s like a gross over excitable puppy so i cn imagine her wriggling up to him n carefully as possible plopping his arm over her as he slept. inspired by this image bt rly just.... in any form she’d tuck herself up w him n sleep tht way w the aim of somehow waking up first n moving before he realised she’d done it. idk if tht would have happened i wnt lie lana sleeps rly soundly when she’s cosy w ppl she likes so <3 mayb he ws disgusted by this when he woke up n saw it bt it’s ok <3 lana wld laugh it off n not care

i think i might hv mentioned this as a hc very briefly in a reply before bt???? i jst thought of it again now. i hv this idea in my head of a game lana wld play with viktor where she’d draw in biro on her thigh a grid fr noughts and crosses except she usually does like. stars and hearts or just a way more Lana version..... i cn imagine her making him play this w her when they were like. jst sat out on the beach in provincetown or in bed after 👀 except i think she wld let him choose what he drew for his turns. smthn to represent him. mayb she’d suggest a ram’s head like black phillip fr his sexy chaotic satanic goat aura n he’d be like ya sure i’ll draw a whole fking detailed ram’s head in this tiny square lana n she’d be like ugh ur talent ur mind jst ignoring the sarcasm n loving it instead. in a similar ball park i feel like she wld doodle things on his tattoos like a penis on his marble statue-esque one (if tht is actually canon i cnt remember if u said it was i won’t lie) n jst things like tht. rly all of these things r just an excuse to touch him n vice versa bt. the noughts n crosses game in particular is one she made up just fr him.

fr his bday i feel like lana wld give him a homemade coupon tht entitles him to an elaborately staged rouse where they entrap some loser man w a fake relationship / spat / whtever which involves her seducing him n viktor finding them n freaking out. like they hv before bt. maybe this one wld even involve sfx blood it wld be extreme n dramatic n scandalous. mayb lana wld at one point put in fake vampire teeth. it wld be ridiculous the guy wld be like what the fuck who are u people. he wld maybe get genuinely injured it wld be a lot. sometimes lana can b a bit immoral fr the drama of it all i feel like viktor brings out her most rogue side n honestly tht is sexy. bt anyway in addition to this she wld ask judes help n get him to do a drawing/piece of tatiana. she wld be nervous abt giving this to viktor bc obviously he doesn’t like talking abt / confronting vulnerable topics so i feel like she’d jst slip it into an envelope n leave it in his room as a silent gift from her n not be there to see his reaction or anything. i think she might not even sign her name she’d jst kiss a lipstick print onto the envelope n know he’d recognise who it was by the colour bc of tht time he said he’d know it anywhere. sighs n lks away...

ok so. fr the night where lana stole trent’s car keys n walked up to viktor at tht party n was basically like “hey wna steal a car w me :)” in not so many words.... this is hw i envision the night panning out. they went speeding. lana at various points was dangling way too much out of the window n holding her hands out bc she loves feeling the wind on her fingers when ppl drive fast. hair jst blasting everywhere truly no concern fr safety. viktor probably literally hd to haul her bk into the car by her ass at numerous points bc she almost flew out n died. she’d ask him to find an empty lot where they cld spin n skid around the place n keep being like AGAIN AGAIN CAN WE GO AGAIN like a giddy child requesting another go on the swings. after all tht fun i feel like she wld hv been like lets drive out somewhere quiet n they’d end up like. at some kind of lake in the woods. mayb they get out there idk bt after all the thrill/novelty wore off a bit i feel like trent’s car wld mke lana sad bc she has bad memories associated with it / him in general n she’d jst impulsively hit the bonnet n try to snap the windscreen wipers n struggle doing it bc she doesn’t hv the arm strength so she’d jst be like ERGH!!!!!!!!!! n try to kick the car after giving up n it wld be rly hard n hurt her foot n she’d b swearing like FK this car it’s so UGLY......... jst the worst tantrum bc her heart’s never Rly in it when she’s angry it’s always just very clear she’s sad n trying to make tht sadness seem braver. mayb his way of calming her dwn in this situation wld b like. let’s sink the fker <3 n lana is silent fr a bit before being like. sniffs. ok :) bt she’ll only do it if they’re in the car n drive it into the lake bc she wants to see all of trent’s shitty cds get wet n ruined frm the inside. anyway. it happens. they hv to climb out of the lake sopping wet n walk bk all tht way. is it cold? idk. this ws all a hideous idea bt that’s on brand. i won’t lie she’d maybe silently hold his hand on the walk bk fr a little while n if he commented on it be like ummmm if we don’t work together to preserve body heat we Lit Rally might get hypothermia viktor don’t b a BABY abt it i’m saving ur life if anything u shd thank me i dnt even wna hold ur big sexy hand i’m jst playing paramedic... bt in reality who r we kidding. she’d jst wna hold his hand. she’s sick <3

[translightyagami]

♡ Light x Misa

Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling/vice versa

Misa can’t work a door to save her life. she just runs into them full force bc she’s distracted thinking abt other stuff. everyone’s like “oh light why don’t you hold the door open for her?” and he’s like “uh. i’m. i walk too slow.”

Who doodles little hearts all over the desk with their initials inside them

Misa has a little decal on the back of her phone with their initials and shows it to everyone. she got one for light but found it in the trash later with a couple of strawberry candy wrappers. it was a crushing blow.

Who starts the tickle fights

Sometimes Misa likes to try and tease some fun out of Light. when she tickled him, its the one and only time he’s physically pushed her, like shoved her to the ground, out of pure reflex. they don’t talk abt it after that but Misa...uh...doesn’t try to do that again.

Who starts the pillow fights

no one. if there was a pillow fight, it might get a little too serious too fast and someone would end up with a bruise.

Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile

light purposefully doesn’t go to bed until misa is asleep bc he hates the feeling of her watching him. it makes his skin crawl, knowing she might see him unguarded like that. she doesn’t deserve to see light yagami asleep. he doesn’t watch her sleep either. its not like he hasn’t seen her face before, doesn’t see it every day. sometimes he watches television.

Who mistakes salt for sugar

oh the amount of bad cups of coffee the both of them have made. they both aren’t super morning ppl so its always like a little tussle over who has to get up and make coffee. then whoever makes coffee has to get out the sugar and milk but misa never has her contacts in first thing in the morning and light’s eyesight is getting a little worse so there’s been a number of times where salt has made an appearance and just decimated any good will during the morning.

Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1am in the morning

light, when he gets home from late cases, has been known to eat a 7-Eleven cup of soup at one a.m. and just let that microwave beep as loud as it wants. he doesn’t give a shit. he just wants to suck down some broth and then go have a nightmare abt failing his midterms or whatever.

Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines

oh i don’t think either of them talk enough to each other for pick up lines tbh.

Who rearranges the bookshelf in alphabetical order

light has a very precise way he likes his bookshelves arranged, which isn’t by alphabet but by subject. misa honestly doesn’t give a shit. she doesn’t like to read and its easier to just let light do what he wants then to fight him on where Moby Dick should go.

Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies

if one of them cooks, which isn’t likely, misa licks the spoon and light calls her disgusting so she chases him with the dirty spoon. it is one of her joys in life.

Who buys candles for dinners even though there’s no special occasion

misa just buys a lot of candles. like two years after they started living together, misa got rlly into aromatherapy and just bought a giant stockpile of candles and now their apartment smells like peaches which light just. Hates.

Who draws little tattoos on the other with a pen

its not a tattoo but sometimes light will take misa’s hand and write a note to himself for later as tho she is a literal notebook. she thinks its very romantic and he thinks its very practical.

Who comes home with a new souvenir magnet every time they go on vacation

light loves souvenirs tbh. he likes evidence of his travels, like how worldly he is. misa always buys those souvenir shot glasses and for some reason they love to take pictures. after light dies, the NPA finds a scrapbook misa made in their apartment filled with pictures of she and light on vacation. its almost bizarre how happy they appear in the photos. its like two other people dressed like light and misa, smiling for a camera until the true couple comes to take their place.

Who convinces the other to fill out those couple surveys in the back of magazines

misa fills out the couples survey but for both of them and what do you know? they always end up being compatible.

[herotheshiro]

ok i didn’t do a review of the phoenix wright trilogy but i’ll do a mini-write-up on apollo justice which i just finished earlier. this is mainly due to me looking up apollo justice/ace attorney afterwards and seeing ppl talk vaguely abt how and where the series and characters go after this... i wanted to add my 2 cents to the void of the internet i guess lol

spoilers for aa4 below

i think as a story, apollo justice is quite good but definitely a bit lacking in writing compared to the 1st trilogy. i feel like this is pretty much the common fan opinion, esp since the 1st trilogy was written all together as a 3-game-set and apollo justice has to conclude everything within 1 game. i think this game did real good at revealing info over time... i remember when they revealed the troupe gramarye poster and i was like WAIT... THAT’S SHADI SMITH... HOLD UP... personally though, i think the ending was not very strong for me -- i feel like we nailed kristoph almost a bit too easily at the end without much i guess concrete evidence linking him to everything even if basically everything was really pointing to him. [EDIT: lol ok reading summaries on aa4 and yeah apparently this is the point and why it being a jurist sys trial was so important… and the realization that he really could get nailed for the crime that he’s been paranoid abt for years made him break down at the end. Ok that makes sense I guess, I was just used to things playing out like the 1st trilogy where you would last min get decisive evidence lol] other than that, there was quite a number of loose ends that didn’t get tied up

so what happened to valant? i think the implication was that he was gonna turn himself in out of guilt even if he didn’t actually kill magnifi (sp?). and also w trucy having the rights i guess it would be complicated for the 2 of them to work that out. that whole aftermath wasn’t entirely clear to me esp since they didn’t give him a post-credits scene

so we’re not gonna get an explanation for why thalassa left her not-even-1-yo son to fend for himself? that was like my no. 1 thing i would’ve liked to get a reason for but the ending is just her being like oh yeah i remember now he’s my son and that’s it. no explanation for why she left him behind and returned to troupe gramarye w/o him. like at least a “oh it would’ve been complicated to bring a literal baby to raise back into that traveling group” would’ve sufficed, esp since we’re supposed to get the impression that lamiror is a kind woman. yet she left her damn kid behind with only a bracelet. were we just supposed to assume the explanation i gave above? i mean yes i’ve looked it up vaguely and i think we get more info on apollo’s growing up in later games but i’ve heard w very little mention of thalassa. which i mean i get, thalassa left him when he was around 1yo so he prob wouldn’t remember shit but man we never gonna get that explanation huh. it’s kinda messed up to leave this baby behind who i assume you care about; it’s another story if she didn’t want the kid and therefore didn’t care what happened to him but she left a bracelet w him which implies she does care

also the loose end of them not telling apollo and trucy they’re siblings. i’ll save this for a later paragraph though

also side note but when i was finishing the game up and before i saw the ending, i literally had a passing, very brief thought like “oh what if lamiror was actually trucy and apollo’s mom lol. what a crack thought” but then it actually happened... i mean it’s good to wrap up that mystery of lamiror’s past, plus they were insinuating so hard that maybe thalassa wasn’t actually dead lol so yeah you knew the mom was gonna pop up fr by the end

apollo himself as a character. now i’m not gonna nit-pick as much here bc he does show up again in later games w more backstory and character development as i’ve heard, but yeah he is very much a mystery character in aa4 i feel. he has basically no given history throughout the game, and the lack of detail made sense at first when you slowly started connecting the dots that he and the gramarye power were related, but then they never really shed any more light on him at the end. they really only reveal he and trucy are related just to explain why and how he has the power to perceive, not even to really indicate anything abt them as characters. i kinda forgot about this as i played the game, but i read a write-up by someone else being like “oh yeah phoenix you know his motivations as a defense attorney but apollo has basically none” and i was like yeah that’s right huh. bc the 1st trilogy reveals p early on that phoenix had a certain motivation to be a defense attorney but apollo you don’t get that, he’s just an attorney just to be an attorney i guess. which i mean is fine, you don’t always need a reason to do stuff sometimes, but it does make him a weaker character. i think maybe in the beginning they were like oh apollo respects kristoph as a lawyer but then they don’t really develop mpre  backstory there like how they met or why kristoph decided to take him on. i thought the latter was gonna be a point that was gonna come up, like maybe kristoph took apollo on as part of his large masterplan or something bc i think kristoph does mention being aware of apollo’s “power” but yeah they didn’t delve further into that. anyway i’ll go less on this bc i’ll just assume they had plans for him to show up in later games therefore they didn’t fully flesh him out here. otherwise that means they just didn’t bother on him other than him having the perceive power and having a personal relation to the whole gramarye case

how did drew misham or vera idk who painted it know abt all of apollo’s 3 cases? i thought it was gonna be like oh phoenix or kristoph saw all this coming and somehow told misham abt it who drew it but uh that didn’t happen. was that bc drew misham was following phoenix in the news and saw the stuff happening w apollo and was inspired to draw his cases? that was a dramatic reveal when apollo/trucy/ema found it out but i mean i guess it was just to show that misham was connected to them/the overall story more than just a simple jurist sys test case

the last writing thing i’ll mention is abt trucy and apollo being siblings. after the whole phoenix x maya crap in the 1st trilogy i suspected they were gonna do the same with apollo and trucy... thankfully they didn’t which was good bc i liked them a lot as a platonic duo, also since i actually thought apollo was 25yo for a while so that age gap is pretty weird too if you do it romantically. i suspected they were actually related p early on after discussing my playthrough w my sis who upon googling info said ‘lol i did say why not ship them but i will not say that anymore’ so i was like lol it’s prob bc she found out they were related or something. regardless i mean i would have suspected that anyway bc the game pushes the ‘oh this perceive power is really only seen in trucy’s family line’ so hard so it’s like not that hard to draw the line bw them, esp when they’re super vague abt apollo’s history and how he even got that bracelet in the 1st place. anyway i think it’s cute to imagine two siblings running all over town to solve shit. as expected tho, there are still ppl out there who ship them even after knowing the truth which is meh but i mean what do you expect of fandom/the internet.

although one of my biggest disappointments is the fact that apparently even in later games, the two never find out they’re siblings. i mean i guess it’s not a major plot point that NEEDS to be addressed as covered in point #3 above, but come on? their mom is literally still alive? a mom and her children reuniting and developing their family relationship again? i mean she’s been so distanced from them for so long that a family reunion would be awkward sure but zak literally made phoenix promise to tell trucy apollo was her bro so i’m surprised he never told her even before his conversation with thalassa at the end of the game. like i thought for sure they were gonna reveal their sibling relationship in aa4 but sadly my imagined revelation scene never happened

(i literally thought up a funny scene too... them seeing thalassa and both being like “MOM??” at the same time and then looking at each other in confusion before thalassa confirms that yes she is both of their moms. although this makes less sense on apollo’s part since he prob wouldn’t remember what she looks like but i mean same bracelets)

otherwise, gameplay was pretty interesting this time around. music was bopping tbh, i played aa4 right after finishing trials and tribulations and wow the music quality improvement was so obvious. the perceive thing was pretty cool and their tutorial on how to use it was super cute lol (apollo: that’s cool but i’m freaking out a little here // trucy: yeah your eyes are kinda bugging out); although absolutely hilarious on how apollo "explained” it in court... imagine a lawyer looking real hard at you and then being like ‘actually you swallowed weird when you said this therefore you’re lying’... i cannot even imagine how that sounded the 1st time to the judge and klavier... anyway i also thought the MASON technologies chapter was really interesting, w phoenix going back and forth through time and using evidence from the future for the past and vice versa. fun time traveling stuff!

ok and that’s kind of all i wanted to say i guess. i’m prob gonna try to stay in the dark on fan content stuff like i was purposely doing before playing aa... i was looking some stuff up and i was like ‘huh... i didn’t get this impression of apollo or the apollo/klavier ship when i was playing aa4...’ i don’t want to get my own opinion of these characters warped by fan content/others’ opinions so i might just take a bit of time to solidify how i feel about/characterize each of the characters before i trek out into fandom land. also it’s prob bc i haven’t played apollo’s later games since he supposedly gets more character dev later. tbh idk if i will bc to be frank i’ve been using emulators to play aa so far and i don’t think there’s a rom out for the later aa games on 3ds. i mean if there really isn’t, i’ll prob just watch a playthrough on YT so i can continue the aa story since i did like apollo as a character despite his lack of backstory.

i was considering skipping edgeworth’s games to go right to dual destinies and continue on apollo’s story/the aftermath of that game, but tbh i’m less incentivized to since i’ve heard that the story/character continuity aspect kind of goes out the window in later games (also the point abt apollo and trucy still being in the dark abt them being siblings. even though yes it wouldn’t change how they interact w each other, i would also prefer the fact to be known officially in-universe so characters don’t be freaks as apparently there are some lines in later games that are a little weird). i mean i could end up having a different opinion abt the continuity, but yeah seeing those comments did put a damper on me diving straight towards dual destinies. so i might just play edgeworth’s games first as i originally planned anyway since they were developed right after even if they take place before aa4

[fitzykreiner]

To me, what really pisses me off is how Shamier was treated this season. Like you said he may have had other projects but you can work around it and not just have him appearing just to be in episodes but you can actually give him a storyline. And the thing is, they need him so fucking much, he saves the day almost every single time. Then he just disappears because he doesn't get any recognition for all that he does for everyone. There were so many opportunities missed. It's Problematic as fuck

yep!!!!!!!! that’s what i’m saying -- fine, the actor has other projects going on, that doesn’t mean you have to then half-assedly write the character. :/ 

im putting a cut bc im just gonna answer all these asks that y’all sent me like a week ago,

What I really hate about this whole situation is how hardly anyone is calling them out on their shit. Like shit how do people expect us to feel watching this show as POC's when the POC's on this show are treated like shit. Idc if they add another cast member and they're POC, it won't take away from the fact that one of them is a lead and constantly sidelined, one is now a villain and was treated like shit and one is only there for comedic timing and to give googley eyes at doc.

“one of them is a lead + constantly sidelined, one is now a villian + was treated like shit, & one is only there for comedic timing + to give googly eyes at doc” you........just hit it right on the fucking head there. im so pissed. dolls was treated like an actual nuanced main character, then he wasn’t. rosita was given an AMAZING story by having her be a revenant yet be kind and just tryna live her life, then they decided to somehow pull off the double trope of “poc sacrifices themself for white friends” + “poc is the villain”, like what kind of racist two birds w one stone kinda bullshit.......and then ya, jeremy. he’s never really been anything but comedic relief apart from the few hints that he’s got an interesting past + him saying that he never left purgatory bc he doesn’t fit in there but no one asked him to fit in anyway . 

What hurts even more is how all three POC characters have been used to prop up the white male character. Dolls has just been sidelined the whole season and am I supposed to believe that wynonna didn't give two shits about him in the finale when this is the same woman who fought so hard to save him in 2x01. Rosita was treated like shit from doc. And then Jeremy treats him like he can fucking walk on water. I didn't mind him but this and his fans have made me hate doc with a passion now.

it really feels like there’s a divide in the writers’ room between who likes wyndolls(+dolls) and who likes wyndoc(+doc) bc its just.......one or the other whenever either make an appearance. like i feel like when an episode is written by a person who prefers wyndoc, dolls barely makes an appearance or is mentioned maybe once, and vice versa lmao. i really wish they would make up their minds instead of having one wyndolls episode, then a wyndoc episode, then a wyndolls episode, ad infinitum. plus ya this season had way too much doc praise from everyone imo.................whoops

I know you don't hate doc but what makes me even more mad about him, is that he constantly makes mistakes and treated people like shit. Like how tf does he get away with this constantly??? Yet whenever Dolls makes a mistake it's the end of the world and he needs a talking to. I really don't know if I can carry on watching this I want them to pick a ship and just stick with it (hopefully wyndolls) because the whole triangle is convoluted as fuck and it's making me dislike the show.

i think doc has truly grown from who he was back before the well happened, but he still is an asshole and can be a shitty person (esp re: rosita lmao). i think he’s a flawed man and that’s... acceptable, but what i don’t find acceptable is that, like u said, he’s never called out on it. in order to deserve all the praise he got from every character this season, he really should have apologized to ppl abt things he’s said and done. 

lmao.......u know why dolls’s mistakes are treated more seriously and actually brought to his attention vs. doc’s mistakes.......You Know Why

I just wanna say thanks, it feels good to be able to rant like this, so many people treat this show likes it's perfect when it's extremely problematic at times. I'm fucking praying, like down on my knees praying that they don't carry on this romantic wynd*c bullshit in S3 and this love triangle because wyndolls is far superior and shit I think everyone knows it. I think a lot of the fandom is a lot more receptive to their relationship because it's so beautiful compared to that mess.

no probs im always here for u to rant to!!!!!

Coming from a hardcore wyndolls shipper this shit has really hit me hard. Trust me I know they're a fictional character and it's just a show but I've been through so many times of my fav characters (who happen to be POC) either getting sidelined or killed off and I'm not sure if I can deal with it anymore. And the person who I'm really upset for is shamier. Because shit man he deserves so much better. This has actually made me lose so much trust in the writers and I have no hope left for S3.

listen u don’t have to come here and justify why this has affected u so much to me, i understand completely. a lot of people (including me) cling really tightly to some fictional worlds & characters and when the creators fuck up it hurts. also ya shamier no doubt deserves better, tho im happy he’s out doing other things too, not just being wasted by wearp

I was just reading all your asks on the finale and I remembered wynonna telling doc that she never would've kissed dolls if she knew doc was back and I'm just like... what! That whole sentence just contradicts one of the main themes and relationships of S1. Listen I loved the moments that we got of wyndolls in S2 but this forced wynd*c relationship has me feeling so disappointed in the show. when S3 is back on I'm just gonna wait to see how dolls/wyndolls is treated before watching. I cba

rip i just had to look up what “cba” meant bc i thought maybe u ran out of characters and misspelled a word and i just never got the second message alkdfjalkdsalk

no really that so came out of left field bc like???? wynonna + dolls were being built up the entire first season, it was all leading to dolls admitting his feelings and them kissing. (remember when wyn dared dolls to admit that he cares for her?? and he couldn’t? so she called him a pussy and walked away???? then he finally did admit that he needs her in the finale? im crying) wynonna + doc was just them learning to trust each other and fucking in the forest that one time, there was nothing OVERTLY romantic abt their relationship compared to wyndolls. 

I just don't get how they expect me to believe that forced ass relationship. She literally looks at dolls like he's her whole world, and when he came back she looked so relieved and happy again. I hate love triangles in shows and this season especially has made me intensely dislike doc, especially after 2x03 with that whole "I ain't doing it for him" comment. And his treatment of Rosita and his actions during 2x06. I cannot deal with this shit and I really don't trust them anymore, not at all

oh ho hohoho boyyyyyy i forgot abt the “i aint doin it for him” which, first thing, is such BULLSHIT, doc cares abt dolls, it’s been established. anyway, im this whole ask,,,,,.

[rbbtrd]

I Love Healing

i wrote this when i was tryin to vent but i have no idea how to fuckin vent so instead i. tried to write out healings entire bg lmao a lot of brain stuff was goin on so it might not b. the best piece of literature uve ever read

some misc facts and other htings might b missing bc (points at how fucked my brain was and also how fuckin VAST healings character is and how much development he has)

//warnin theres kinda crass and sensitive language or whatever and there will b mentions of diff kinds of abuse in his story and other not good things under cut so my bad but i wasnt in a good state of mind and tryin to tag n warn u abt it all is skjncfdvav plus this was a vent post for me originally anyways lmao

//another warning lmao under the cut is a Wall Of Text there is a LOT of stuff under cut like 6000+ words so like. warned ya my pals

healing is my favorite fuckin oc and p much. why i fuckin stay alive sknfsef he means so so much to me and has so much meaning to me and is very very very very very very very important to me i fucking Love healing okay i project a lot (i.e All Of Myself) onto healing so he is p much almost quite literally me and vice versa but also not rlly??? its weird and complicated lmao i Love this man tho no one will ever love him more than i do i will fuckin Fight you hes so improtant to me

he is 57 yrs old, his birthday is march 17 but also dec 5th (its complicated) but mostly march 17, his favorite color is red not only bc im projecting but his first loves fav color was also red, he is 5″7 ft tall, hes very silly and kooky and tries his best to become happy and heal and learn and atone for what hes done and expereinced, he LOVES the sea and the ocean and anything relating them like the sea/ocean is very very very important to him for multiple reasons, also loves rabbits and goats and has 2 pet goats (i like to call em his service animals lol)

healing was born to both pure blood tiefling parents, his mother was a servant/slave that belonged on a ship and his father basically just knocked her up, he never met or knew anything about his father other than that he was a tiefling and misc stuff his mom/other servants had told him. his dad is mordecai ahkrah and hes chaotic evil and genuinely a very fucking awful person, his mom is ariarei kallies and is just?? kinda a chatoic neutral, maybe more of a lawful evil, but she has a very bad selfish personality and nasty. she holds no maternal feelings for healing and only sees him as a nuisance and only takes care of him (taking care of him means. The Bare Minimum. i.e- makin sure hes just Not Dead) bc she has to and kinda forcced to. healing does not see ariarei as his mother, but “as the woman who birthed me / brought me into this world” and stuff like that and therefore holds no feelings towards her like a child would w their mother, over the years, healing considers the ocean/sea as his mother more than ariarei and is more emotionally connected to the sea

 healings mom actually never named him, he was nameless/had no name up until the age of 27-28. both his mom and the owners of the ship and whoever hired him always only ever called him “boy”, “child”, “it”, “thing”, “errand boy”, “chore boy”, and names like that bc he never had a name and no one bothered to give him one. both his mom and the owners/ppl who hired him treated him very very poorly and did abuse him frequently in many different ways and manners (lmao projects myself onto my oc) so he has a lot of feelings and experiences w lots of kinds of traumas and abuse

he most specifically received a lot of physical abuse especially from ppl and verbal abuse, some but not too much emotional abuse, and also a handful of sexual abuse. at the time, he thought it was fine and normal and did not realized he was being abused bc “this is just how life is” bc he had literally. never heard of or experienced anything else other than a shit life.

he didnt rlly think anything of the poor treatment or the abuse bc this was all he ever knew, he grew up this way, so he thought it was normal and thought everyone didnt feel anything and if they did OF COURSE theyd b negative feelings, bc thats all u (healing at the time) r capable of feeling. he doesnt get out of this mentality until hes around 18-22

he receives a handful of scars and marks from his time as a servant, he got his first scar when he was a literal Baby bc he was cryin out and his ma got mad and upset abt and scratched his face thus resulting in his lip scar. when he was like 5-7 he met this other servant kid who had The Very Opposite mindset he had and was v bright and optimistic and he dragged healing along when he played and he broke smth and healing took the cover not bc he wanted to save this kid but bc it would be less troublesome bc then the current owner would only have to punish 1 child and the other kid was well liked on the ship unlike healing so then the morale of the servants wouldnt be affected. the owner beat him up p bad but it Wasnt Enough so he smashed healings face into the wooden boards so hard it Broke The Board and also broke his right horn, this also gave his scarring above his brow and stuff up to the broken horn. another prominent scar he has that holds memory to him is the scar on his chest above his heart, where he got that from a case where he was sexually abused and his abuser threatened to tear out his heart if he kept bein a brat. he has NO SCARS on his tail tho, but thats literally bc up until he was w morgan, he was just Lucky in not havin his tail injured. from the time he met morgan and beyond, he then started to actively protect his tail from harm and from ppl touchin it bc morgan said he rlly liked his tail and how it looked and how cool it was and from then on hes liek Oh

he constantly worked when he was of age to and started w small things and worked up to doin manual labor and other things, he only stayed w his mom up until the age of 11-12, after that they were separately sold to different ships and never saw eaqch other again. from that point on, he was switched around a few different ships and buyers, but was otherwise was still  just treated as cargo and property like he had been the past few years. 

the ship he was on at the age of 17 was stopped and liberated by a man named morgan wake (also can be written as morgain), a  human sailor captain (some kind of good, leanin on neutral or chaotic) who specializes in trade, cargo, and just transportation, but also will sell his abilities to fight/go into war or battle and liberates slave ships on his free time lol morgan becomes a Very Very Very important person to healing and is ESSENTIAL to shaping healing into who he is now. healing slowly falls in love with morgan over the years, but never tells morgan abt these feelins bc 1) he doesnt kno what the FUCk hes feelin lmao this boy has only experienced negative emotions and feelings up until he met morgan and 2) he thinks morgan will think hes weird or wrong or gross or smth. healing had absolutealy NO PLACE and NO ONE to go to after he was liberated so morgan saw this and was like Hey. You Should Come Work Under Me For MY Ship. morgan is a BIG BIG BIG guy on justice and equality and stuff for ALL PEOPLE and EVERYONE so this is also a reason why he let healing onto his ship of mostly humans and half-elves and halflings and also this part abt morgan rubs off on healing so healing also becomes a big guy on justice and equality and stuff

the ship morgan owns is a Lil prejudiced againt tieflings so they arent jumpin for joy when morgan makes healing his first mate at the age of 19 bc theyre. Gently Racist over tieflings but morgan kicks their ass and makes healing his first mate and right hand man anyways. at this point, healing is still nameless bc morgan tells him “i cant give you a name, a name is really important, its your identity and what makes you YOU, its ur soul and ur dreams and ur hopes, its YOU, you hear a name and u think of that person etc etc etc” and rlly cheesy stuff like that pertaining to names so morgan is Vehemently against naming healing and instead calls him “buddy”, “pal”, “friend”, “best friend”,  “first mate”, “mate”, and other various nicknames made over the years. he was very adamant on having healing name himself and refused to call him by a name that someone else gave him bc healing told him abt his mom and how he said that his mom wasnt rlly a mother in the first place

morgan knows Everything abt healing and healing w him vice versa bc when they first met and healing was still in his Uhm Nothing Matters Ill Tell You Everything mindset, he told morgan the story abt all his scars and what has happened to him up until that point and what people have done to him. morgan is truly very genuinely heartbroken over this?? bc healing was just Born into this world of shit and awful things that he didnt deserve and also the fact that healing just spoke of his abuse so freely and casually as if it meant nothing and didnt matter and healings view on his own life and life in general due to how he has lived so far and morgan makes it his personal mission to help healing grow out of this and start to become more Alive and less :| and :/ abt life 

morgan becomes very important for and to healing bc like. he literally taught healing Emotions and how amazing and happy and good life can be. morgan taught healing how to Be Alive and Want To Be Alive and how to Feel. before when he was a servant, he was literally just a Shell and genuinely thought life was Supposed to just be inherently shitty and ur suposed to always expereince bad htings and ALWAYS feel ONLY bad negative emotions and feelings.he thought that if he died, it wouldnt matter AT ALL bc he would easily b replaced by another servant and his life had literally no meaning and he genuinely thought he would die before the age of 20 and he was Okay with that he thought it was fine he thought it was okay to not expect to live past 20-25 and etc etc etc. 

when he saved healing, morgain was already quite old-ish?? he was 30 yrs old when healing (at the time, age 17) met him. healnig didnt rlly start to fall in love until around age 19 just some time b4 morgan made him first mate. over the years that healing is on morgans ship, he becomes who he is bc of morgan and  he learns things abt himself and who he is and builds himself bc of morgan and he becomes who healing is in these very moments that he spends with morgan and rightly falls in love because of it bc morgan Saved Him from so many things. morgan took an empty husk and shell of a man that had Began as empty and put smth in it. he had breathed life into an empty bag and made music, he had taken a broken branch and carved a nice ass figure. morgan took something with nothing and gave him Everything.  healing has such a strong connection and attachment to morgan yall cant even begin to understsand it. Runs So Deep in healing, this lov and feeling and attachment he has to morgan

morgan also rlly rlly rlly Rlly likes and appreciates healing and actually also loves healing in the same way, but doesnt tell healing for the same reasons why healing wont tell morgan. they spend the next 10 yrs basically unknowingly pining over each other bc theyre too fuckin afraid to tell each other bc they think the other is gonna b homophobic and its Awful. but also like. sailors back in the day were Rlly Gay so healing and morgan have had their fair share of mutual masturbation and Very Gay Activities w each other bu they were never in the context of romance or in a relationship beyond like. Rlly Rlly Good Best Friends lmao like sex friends but better??

bc healing. was never fuckin educated lmao he doesnt kno how to read or write. over the years he spends with morgan, he BARELY understand the alphabet tbh. he can like,,,,,, understand certain words but he doesnt recognize those words as words they register kinda like symbols in his head. numbers r even WORSE for healing lmao. like he understands map terms north, east, west, south, map, longitude/latitude, etc etc but he recognizes the words as like pictures or symbols in his head that relate to object or meaning or smth, kinda how u see a lil pic of a tree and u recognize it as a tree, thats him w words. healing was morgans first mate and co-captain for 10 years, he often went with morgan to negotiations and business meetings and trades and etc etc etc healing is VERY good w his words bc of this and is actually rlly smart and intelligent and wise. he just cant read or write lol. he has a +0 intelligence on his sheet but a +3 wisdom

healing lives the next 10 yrs of his life after being liberated at the age of 17 to 27 w morgan and his ship and his crew and hes enjoying himself and livin it to the fullest and hes happy and its so good and all is well, but also keep in mind that healing, through out all of these 10 yrs, has STILL not have a name for himself yet. BUT morgan HAS given healing a seashell necklace as well as his ear piercings. he wears these items everyday and they hold like. a lot of emotional important and support for him

but then morgan dies LMAO morgan dies at the age of 40 when healing is 27 and he dies from both sickness from old age (bc sailors back then. died p early skdjfnwsndv) and also from an injury wound he had gotten when in battle earlier that month. morgans death strikes his crew very harshly but without a doubt everyone on the ship agreed that healing was the MOST hurt and affected and shaken from morgans death. morgans last words and also his will states that he wanted healing to become the new captain of the ship. healing doesnt rlly become the new captain bc hes too busy mourning over his death for the next yr.

morgan and healing NEVER tell each other abt their feelings for one another, so morgan dies with this regret of never saying anything and healing lives with the regret of never saying anything before he died. this plays into how healing chose his name

after his mourning and grieving period he starts to slowly collect himself and in this period of time, this is where he finally chooses his name. he thinks abt how morgan was never able to call him by a proper name despite how important names were to morgan, so as hes starting to heal from his death, he picks his own name for himself. he debated on choosing his name as love, bc he loved morgan but never told him despite the fact that morgan quite literally taught him how to love. but he decides on the name healing bc he also thought abt how morgan said how he wanted to help healing start to mend and heal from all the trauma and abuse hes been through and healing sort of just shoved love into that process of healing, therefore That Is His Name Now. his name is now like. an important memoir of morgan as well as like. His Name. his name now holds a very hefty important weight and meaning to him now.

when morgan dies, he makes a lot of vows to himself like how hell never love someone again and how he would keep up morgans work and how he would keep morgans policy of justice and equality and how he would never treat people the way he was treated as a servant and how he would never hurt someone on purpose. after morgans death, he starts to like. hoard items he thinks morgan would have liked and then eventually this just turns from “hoarding for morgan” to “depression coping hoarding” and he just hoards things he thinks has some use or worth of value (which is like. Everything lmao so he never throws stuff away)

the ship crew are not All That Happy that healing is their new captain, but they really did intensely respect and appreciated morgan both as a captain and an individual so they abide by his will and last words and let healing be captain despite the fact that they thought hed b bad at it. but Surprise Surprise healing is actually rlly rlly good at being a captain bc he spent 10 yrs by morgans side and he knows how to do everything rlly well and the crew r kind of surprised and apologize for sterotypin him and for being so prejudiced and not trustin him and etc etc etc and healing is happy for another long while bc now he has like?? a family?? this crew was now his family and he loved everyone on this ship and they loved him?? he was Rlly Good at what he did bc he took over morgans work of trade and also liberating ships and sellin his time to fight for ppl and he was super close to his crew and they grew closer over the yrs and they give him a seashell bracelet similar to how morgan gave him the necklace and earrings so now healing has like. a physical object to associate his emotional relationship and feelings and shit to like he did for morgan w the necklace and earrings

but ofc knowin me its time to Fuck Him Over Again lmao over the yrs while hes in his 30s hes gets like. Rlly Rlly Rlly well known for his deeds and his work and actions so he gets super popular and he has. A Lotta Sex and is Very Well Known for sex and also his dick lol and also sometimes got into. not so hot relationships. at current time right now, age of 57, healing has 5 children he isnt aware of bc he left the other person before they even Knew they were pregnant. he was rlly good with not letting his partner get pregnant but accidents happen lmao sometimes he let the fame and popularity get to his head so he was kind of a Cocky Narcissistic Dick sometimes 

a total of 5 times during his 30s he got himself into. very bad toxic abusive manipulative relationships. these 5 people were all very similar in what they did to healing and how they did it to him. in each of these 5 cases, both healing and his crew reacted the same. when u hang out w manipulative bad ppl, u kinda become manipulative and bad urself, and thats what happened w healing and his crew. these 5 ppl preyed on the fact that healing was emotionally very weak and vulnerable to romantic affection and intimacy and how he had a Rlly Rlly Big Fear of losing people he loved or cared about. they made him care abt them and threatened to leave him if he didnt do what they wanted, as well as abuse him in other different manners physically, emotionally (BIG TIME emotional abuse), verbally, and mentally. during the itme he was in these relationships w these ppl, healing was very much not like his usual self, hes a chatoic neutral but when w theswe ppl he was like?? lawful evil?? true evil?? he became Rlly Bad and did Rlly Bad things that, now in current day time he regrets deeply and feels.

when he was in these relationships, they made him break a lot of the vows he took when morgan died or else theyd do smth to him or to themself ot to his crew or smth like that and it haunts him to this very day abt how he could have done those things to those people despite the fact that the same was done to him and how he NEVER wanted to do that to other people. it dredges bad things up in his memories and in his heart and he has nightmares abt both his traumas and abuse as well as the traumas and abuse hes made others go through.  these people hurt him very deeply in his 30s and scarred him emotionally and mentally more intensely than the people that mistreated him when he was a servant

his 30s was a. Rollercoaster tbh. he went thru very intense and frequent highs and lows bc the time when he was with these people they were his Very Very Low Lows and when he wasnt with them and just doing his job w his crew and livin life he was very happy and his life took on a Very Good High. as he got a lil older at the age of 37 he was doing good and it was a high during his lifetime and that point and when he was 37 he was actually on his ship hunting down a bandit/pirate ship bc someone had bought his ships and effort to help them track down this ship

he has a lot of adventures in his 30s and goes thru so many things and and thru so many situations and so many people and encountered just. A Lot Of Stuff in General. hes experienced probs like. 2 lifetime of experiences and shit by the age of 37 lmao but he wouldnt trade any of these experiences, good or bad, for ANYTHING in the world

but sadly (bc i love makin his life so full of angst) as hes chasing this ship, a Rlly Big Storm comes by and fuckin. WRECKS his ship. absolutely obliterates it. it catches fire and tons of his crew members r jumpin off and panicking and the ship is falling apart and hes so AAAAAAAAAAAAA rn. in the future, the imagery of a sunken or turned up or just in general not normal 100% functioning ship is very unsettling to him and triggers this rlly bad memory. also Rlly Rlly Rlly BIG BIG fires unsettle him very badly and makes him Extremely Uncomfortable but it doesnt rlly trigger this bad memory as much as broken ships do

healing is knocked from the ship and passed out and when he awakes hes on the shore with the remains of wood from his ship along the shore and he is. absolutely broken. he lost his Whole Family in one night and yet he was the one who didnt die?? he assumes everyone on his crew ship died (even tho some survived but he has yet to encounter them) and he was the only one who survived and at the moment he HATED this fact. he hated that he was left to live and he reverts back to his mindset that he had when he was younger how his life didnt matter and etc etc etc

hes also??????????? SUPER upset and heartbroken that the sea was the one who did this to him. the ocean, to which he was born and raised on (he has never lived on land in the past 37 yrs of his life, hes been on land and stayed overnight at inns or smth and stuff but hes never Lived anywhere on land and thinks houses r Weird bc hes lived on a boats and ships for 37 yrs kjefnvslefv), the ocean to which he considered his real mother, the ocean that granted him so much freedom from so much of the things that hes experienced, the ocean to which he was so deeply emotionally connected to and how much the sea had meant to him. he knows he cannot control the sea and accepts that the sea had sunken his ship but that doesnt mean hes not going to still feel sad and shitty abt it lol 

he Basically has a meltdown at this shore and cursin at how he should have been the one to die in this wreck and passes out bc. exhaustion and etc lmao. and then in comes Love Interest #2, noel, a neutral good wood elf monk who, just like morgan, is a very free spirit and very kind and reminds healing just enough of morgan to make his heart start to feel something again

noel sees this tieflin dude passed out on the beach and is like. Oh. Thats Not Good. and he goes to help him out and brings him back to his campsite to patch him up and heal his wounds and take care of him and nurture him back to health a bit until healing wakes up.

healing is like HWHA and is like uhhhh thnks but i gotta Go Now bc Yet Again in this mnoment he vows a bunch of other shit like how hell live a life of solitude and never involve himself w others bc he thinks of himself as a harbinger of bad things and chaos and doom and misfortune follows him and how everyone he loves or tells them abt his life/story dies

but noel is too friendly and caring to just Let Him Go and hes just rlly interested in healing just as an individual and just also wants a companion to travel w bc hes just like a wandering monk who weaves in and out of woods and forests and villages and stuff

fast forward- after a Lot of effort and A Lot of time and A Lot of trust and such, healing slowly Very Very Slowly opens up to noel about himself and his life and what hes gone though and all of the sort of bad and good things hes experienced and grows closer to him and they fall in llove with each other and its both mutual and healing is like “wow??? being in love is so nice?? this is such a good feeling?? i love noel and he loves me back and we can kiss and hug and do stuff and both of us know we are doing this out of mutual romantic attraction??????????” and this is like. A Brand New Feeling for healing bc his relationship and love for morgan was 100% unrequited

noel basically becomes healings teacher tbh since noel is a monk he teaches healing the way of bein a monk most specifically the way of the 4 elements. noel is a master of the way of the 4 elements, but is best w earth and air, healing has such a strong attachment to the water and a close relation with fire so hes naturally like. rlly good w those 2 lmao he catches on real quick despite the fact that. only noel is teaching him and neither of them belong to a temple or have a temple to go to lmao

as time goes on both healing and noel are like. kinda famous monks that travel through the land and are well known bc healing was already previously well known as a rlly rlly cool famous captain and now he kinda dropped off the face of the earth for like 5 yrs but now hes back w noel and he looks a lil diff now bc hes older and his hairs a lil longer but ppl are aware that hes healing

its all good and healing is enjoying life real nice rn and hes happy once again and hes in love with noel and noel is in love with healing and its so good and healing is traveling again but also like. up until he was 37 yrs old he was like livin at sea on a ship. so when he goes along w noel when they travel through the woods on land its kinda Weird for him bc hes like. Never Been On Land For This Long lmao

from the moment he was stranded on that beach to right now in his current time, healing ALWAYS has smth of the sea/ocean w him ALWAYS it is a must and he has to have it for multiple reasons and most of the reasons are for like. safety reasons?? theyre like his safety items it calms him down and soothes him in multiple ways like emotionally and mentally. he ALWAYS has at LEAST 1 (one) bottle or flask or SOMETHING filled w sea water he always has some sea water on him, he also just. collects a MASSIVE amount of shells and sea glass and any other things u could find on the beach or sea he always has some of this stuff on him for comfort and stuff

like with all of the deep and intimate and important and emotional relationships in his life, noel gives healing smth that he can attach noel to emotionally and etc etrc etc. noel gives healing tattoos that are like monk tattoos and symbolize what he does best on his back i.e fire and water and also a few like. just fun lil casual tattoos to make healing and himself happy like a boat and anchor on his wrist and stuff and healing is like Oh Gee Hope Nothing Bad Happens

but smth bad does happen lol. after 10 literal yrs (healing is now 47) theyre in the woods camping out and etc etc etc and its like the dead of night and theyre sleepin in their tents and its good and all but then some bandits or smth just pass by their site and decide “hey. lets fuckin loot this place and fuck shit up” and they do and engage in combat w noel and healing and its just a series of unfortunate events and bad luck and timing and long story short these bandits do lethal and fatal damage to noel but healing manages to fend em off and they go running and now healing is kneeling over the dying body of his lover

noel literally dies in healings arms and this event triggers all of his previous mental state and mindset from before abt how hes a harbinger of bad things and how everyone he loves does and he only brings misfortune and hes liike “y do the ppl around me die???? y cant *I* be the one to die for once??? wtf????” and he feels so many emotions and is so ANGRY at himself bc This Just Keeps happening and the people he loves just keep Getting Hurt and he cries and buries noel and makes a grave and does a lot of sentimental stuff and mourns and just stays where he is in the woods for like. weeks until his supplies runs out and he finally leaves the area of the forest hes in with a heavy… Everything slkdfnvsdkfs fvhesfdnviksfd hes RLLY intensely emotionally and mentally fucked now

he makes the same kinds of vows as before again plus some but now its even STRONGER. he Will Not EVER fall in love ever again, he will never tell anyone ANYTHING abt him thats not surface level info, he takes up his old vows like never hurt ppl on purpose and never treating him the way he was treated and how he will upkeep his code of justice and equality, and how he will NEVER EVER have any deep relationships and friendships and he will keep them very surface level and how he will keep everyone at like an arms distance and a half from him

and so he mourns over his lost loved ones and is just a fuckin angsty emotionally shut and locked up traveling tiefling monk and hes alone and just. travels bc he feels like if he stays in one place too long he might bring misfortune to the ppl around him and he just. BASICALLY keeps this up for ANOTHER 10 yrs dsfkjvnsenfvedv je travels around EVERYWHERE and the first few years he tried his best to avoid rlly thick wooded areas and the sea but eventually he grew and healed a bit more and allowed himself to get on boats again and go thru forests and woods

healing chose his name bc he wanted to heal and grown and change and become a better person and try his best to just be as happy as he could be and to atone for what hes done and just. try to get thru life at this point. and make sure he leaves people better than when he meets them and to make sure everyone he encounters have AT LEAST a Not Bad impression of him. so thats basically what his goal is after noel dies and he just travels on his own and in solitude and he nevers takes along a companion and is jsut by himself and quite literally isolates himself all the time. he keeps the people he talks to at an arm and a halfs distance, he never lets them know anything below surface level info abt him, he like?? basically puts on a front and all but he is still genuinely friendly and likes to talk to ppl he just. doesnt want them to know any like Substantial Info abt him or kno him beyond surface level and stuff

after some time tho he meets a man named elias aka MAN OF THE HOUR aka my datefriends oc and he jsut?? will NOT leave healing alone he just WILL NOT go away and he basically just. is forcibly at healings side as they travel and healing just CANNOT get rid of him and elias is just with him and hes trying to pry thru healings massive amounts of layers and walls and barriers and etc etc etc and ofc he does this respectfully hes not like. forcing his way into healings life and forcing healing to tell him abt his life he just. wants to kno more abt him and is very genuinely attracted to this man in many many ways 

healing realizes he cant force elias to go away and is just like (shrugs) ok w/e guess i cant get rid of u and tries to keep his walls and his front up but he just finds himself getting rlly comfortable w elias?? he finds his presence soothing and stuff bc hes been alone for the past previous yrs and now he has a companion again and its a rlly nice feeling and they grow a lil closer bit by bit over time

more time passes on and eventually, in the middle of a mental break/meltdown, healing just. Spills Everything to elias like. All Of His Life from the moment he was born until this current faction in time where hes sobbing into elias’ arm about his whole life and he feels kind of better and its okay for a while and he just passes out in elias’ arms but then he wakes up and has a panic attack and is like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I TOLD THIS MAN MY ENTIRE LIFE I HAVE TO LEAVE NOW OR HELL DIE I RLLY LIKE HIM THO I DONT WANT HIM TO DIE and he faces the facts that he 1) likes elias 2) is very internally and mentally fukt 3) is internally rlly fuckin secretive and tries to hide everythin abt himself and 4) is Dyin Real Bad for multiple reasons

elias tries to reassure healing and tries to tell him everything will be fine and he wont die and etc etc etc and stuff and from this point on forward healing and elias are much closer and continue to get closer until theyre basically in a relationship and its difficult tbh bc healing rlly wants to leave elias out of his fear but elias stays w him and its a long proccess and journey for healing to learn how to properly cope w all of the things hes felt and experienced and grow and heal and etc et ect

eventually fast forward in time, at the age of 57, healing is MARRIED to elias :’’) and they r in love and everything is okay and healing has and is continuing to learn how to accept what hes done and how to properly cope and deal w things and have less walls and barriers and be better and elias is one of his MOST important relationships to him, on par w morgan and noel, and its all good and happy and healing lives the rest of his life out w elias and dies happy and etc etc etc and its all just GREAT and also their shipname is heelies bc its funny lmao 

i left out a lotta details but fuckin. whatever lmao

anyways i love healing thnk u and good night