#Leana may need some friends

[the-chemtech-medic]

“Jeez, what does a girl have to do to have some fun around this city, been dead for far to long.” She huffed and stretched as she sat on the bench.

[littlethyme]

I sometimes wonder how things would have worked out if Alicent told Rhaenyra that her father keeps pushing her to visit Viserys:

Alicent is very dutiful and I doubt that she would disobey Viserys (at some point he suggested that she kept their meetings a secret from Rhaenyra), so I think she would tell her  before this conversation (maybe at the very early stages of these visits). On the other hand, it is also tempting to think that she would tell her right after the conversation with the king, when she realized things are getting serious. I think this would be the moment to start panicking and thinking that she may actually become a Queen. This hits her like a ton of bricks. The situation is extremely difficult for her because a part of her feels happy that she can serve her house and do her duty, but on the other hand she feels more and more trapped and restless. She also knows that her marriage with the King will not sit well with Rhaenyra so she faces the loss of her precious companion at the exact moment when she will need her the most. Anyway, I imagine them taking a stroll in the garden, Rhaenyra still processing the trauma of losing her mother so their walks are quieter than usual, but Alicent offers all the support she can.

Then, we have the scene in the sept when some of this tension Rhaenyra carries is taken from her shoulders - she is in much better condition when they walk out. So much in fact that, before they return to the castle she envelopes Alicent in a hug and whispers ‘thank you”. And then, I think, it becomes too much for Alicent. She tries to smile but she suddenly starts crying, her emotions taking the better of her. Shocked, Rhaenyra tries to console her and asks what happened. Alicent does not want to tell, but the dragon princess, although usually respectful of her friend’s boundaries, has the urge to protect Alicent from harm, so she pushes the subject. And Alicent tells her everything. Now, I have a problem with imagining Rhaenyra’s reaction. I think she definitely does not interrupt Alicent’s story in part because she is too surprised for any words. I also think that she gets angry when her friend informs her that she visited him for the first time after Aemma’s funeral. She probably wants to walk away but Alicent stops her, she also gets angry: “Do you think I want to do this? What other choice do I have?” Rhaenyra stops, still visibly angry, considering Alicent’s words. “Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?” “I didn’t know how”. She also tells Rhaenyra that she didn’t want to lose her, which is something that makes Rhaenyra look away from her friend, to hide her emotions. She understands this feeling. Who else do they truly have but each other?

They returned to the castle separately, each of them needed more time to themselves. Alicent went to Godswood - she felt like one huge burden was taken from her shoulders, but it was immediately replaced by others: she had broken the king’s order, she had broken her father’s confidence and trust and she might have just lost Rhaenyra. She visited all their favorite spots, thinking if they will be able to enjoy them together ever again.

Meanwhile, Rhaenyra goes to the dragon pit to fly on Syrax. She flies, trying to numb her emotions and thoughts, but she keeps seeing her mother’s sad smile and her words “you will soon be in this bed, Rhaenyra”. Then, the images of her telling Alicent that she would love to take her flying - Rhaenyra was never able to convince her. But Alicent always waited for her to return. Rhaenyra was never able to do much in return, for anyone, really. She is conflicted about the whole situation, but one is clear - Otto is on her hit list.

Then, we have Leana x Viserys convo and Rhaenyra being restless, because maybe there is still a chance that he will not choose Alicent? Rhaenys misinterprets her restlessness and it leads to this whole conversation about men doing anything to prevent a woman from ascending the iron throne. Next, we have Viserys x Alicent convo, him informing her about Leana and Alicent having mixed emotions about it, but her heart’s pounding the beat of hope. And then we have Daemon egg and child crisis, Otto stepping up to handle it.

Rhaenyra goes to the dragonpit to fly, as usual when she faces any dilemma. She thinks about all of these conversations, all of these events, the ones she wants to protect, about Leana, so young, who also faces a very difficult path. And then she thinks that, despite not having more agency and real power, she was titled the heir to the iron throne. She had a voice. Now, not in the future when she may become a queen. When Rhaenys said to her that a woman will never sit on the iron throne, she responded bravely “When I will be a Queen, I’ll create a new order”. But it seems that she got it wrong. She needs to create a new order to become a Queen. She flies to Dragonstone, feeling better than she had in days. She of course handles the situation and hurries back to King's Landing. She needs to act swiftly, before Otto arrives. She goes straight to Alicent’s bedroom.

I love to think that in this bedroom, then and there, the fate of Westeros was decided - not on the Small Council meeting between the man who started the drama in the first place, but between the two friends who both got entangled in this game. Rhaenyra looks so happy and radiant that it makes Alicent feel better too, even though none of her problems were resolved. But Rhaenyra comes up with a plan: if the king chooses Leana, the problem is settled for now, but if not…what can they do? If Viserys chooses Alicent, there will be nothing they can do about it, things have gone too far. Alicent knew that and was prepared to do her duty, but she can’t help but feel her stomach drop. Rhaenyra sees it and asks if she wants her help - she will do anything: smuggle her across the narrow sea, hide her somewhere in Westeros, anything. But Alicent refuses (I think she is too down-to-earth to accept such a solution). “If I could marry you right now, I would”. “If it was possible, I would say yes”. They both look at each other, feeling this connection between them grow stronger, more tender. But also more fierce. Rhaenyra is furious as she feels powerless. She will be able to fight for her place, but what about Alicent, who is not able to protect herself in any way? She starts pacing the room, then stops and looks at Alicent intently. “This is what we can do: if you marry my father and have his children, I will name your first-born as my heir”. Alicent was caught off guard - they did not discuss the succession before, never wanting to even think about the possible complications. The possible conflicts.

“I don’t intend to marry” Alicent looks at Rhaenyra, waiting for her to continue. “After what happened to my mother” she blinks a few times, trying to get rid of unwanted emotions “I don’t want it to happen to me”. Alicent feels her heart break for her friend. There is truly nothing she can say to make it better, so she just takes her hand. They stood for a moment in silence. “If we do this” Alicent starts “it will be best if we have the support of my father”. Rhaenyra instantly scowls. “I hate him for what he did - don’t you?” Alicent is quiet for a moment. “I could never hate him. He is a difficult man, my father, but I know he means well.” “For himself? Most definitely” Rhaenyra can’t help herself but seeing Alicent’s distraught face, she sighs. “I suppose you're right - maybe he will stand by my side and help me not get married”. “I will support you as well, but Rhaenyra…” Alicent hesitates “ I don’t think they will allow you to do that. It is a beautiful plan, but they will definitely want you to make an alliance with someone, and…” “I know,” Rhaenyra quietly agrees. “I know it is unlikely, but if they named me the heir, maybe…” Seeing Alicent's sad countenance she knew that, although she wanted to support her and understood her fear, it would be another matter entirely to make her a sole ruler.

They stay quiet for a moment, trying to see the future they were trying to build in this room. “What if we prolonged it?” Rhaenyra looks up at Alicent with curiosity. “If we will not be able to prevent your marriage, then let's keep it away as much as possible”. Rhaenyra considers her words for a moment. “You're right - it will also give us time to prepare the ceremony for your child, to make the lords pledge allegiance. It will definitely satisfy your father.” “Agreed.” Alicent states, "so we need to buy a few years for you”. Rhaenyra nodded in agreement. “I think it would also be wise that the pledge would once again recognize you as the heir to Viserys and my child as an heir to you - to prevent any unwanted ideas and remove the doubts of some of the lords. And if you have children, then…” “They will be happier if they will not be involved in this political game, I was much happier far away from it”. “Do you not want to be the Queen, then?” Alicent’s voice is free of malice or impure intentions, it's just curiosity and the desire for Rhaenyra to be happy. “No…yes. I want to prove myself. Before my mother…I never dared to dream that father would recognize me in this way. Even if I am just a substitute for Daemon… I want to show them what I am made of. I want to show them that I can be a better ruler than any of the king’s before me. I want the girls like you and me to have a better future, better options - we are limited by so many things. Let them be free, even if we have to suffer for it now.” Alicent felt so many emotions - she was always very composed, very sensible. Now she just wanted to scream. She jumped to her feet and faced the princess. “Let’s do it, Rhaenyra. For us. For the ones to come, for the girls to come. Let's leave this world a better place than we found it”. Rhaenyra beams, and takes Alicent’s hand in her own. She knew that this was the only person who would understand her dream. Now they will make it come true - together. “Alicent, I vow to you to help and protect you in any way I can. I vow to help and protect your children and treat them as my own. I vow that I will never abandon you and our dream. I will fight for the ones that will come after us. And after I become a queen…I will have you by my side, let them think what they will.” Alicent smiles, feeling tears stinging in her eyes. “Rhaenyra, I vow the same to you. I will honor and support you every day, as I will your children. I will protect you from every enemy and when you become a Queen, I’ll be there for you. You will be a great ruler, Rhaenyra, I know it. I have always known it”.

The rest of the evening, they spent laughing and having fun, just like they used to months ago. They have allowed themselves this one evening of girlhood to cement the words and vows exchanged in the light of the candles, for only old and new gods to witness. The true work begins tomorrow, but oh, how much better it would be having someone by your side!

[tavi-hayes]

challenge six ~ family time

((hello hello! massive thanks to anna for the lovely rps @hugo-stanton and @/arin-schreave, and cassey @ladyreggiewright​ thank you for the rp too! uncle aran is such a joy! this fic is hecking long again (11k), i’m sorry. ignore the spelling/grammar mistakes as always. finally, if anyone decides to read this then enjoy! also there is a short bit written in the pov of tavi’s mom just because i felt the need to share her feelings))

The feeling of missing my family has become unbearable. It’s the first thing I think of in the morning and the last thing on my mind before I go to sleep at night.

During the day I can suppress the thoughts simply by focussing on other stuff. Music for example. Or the anticipation for the food we’ll have for dinner. But dinner reminds me of Brooke’s elimination and how quiet it is during mealtimes without her around.

Or my mind goes to Hugo and that kiss. The thought alone makes me feel all warm inside. I still can’t believe that happened. It feels like a dream. Or a fairy tale. Something unreal.

I trace the stitching on the hem of the tablecloth with my finger. There is a beautiful golden embroidery all over the fabric. It still surprises me how these royals live. Even their tablecloths look like a work of art.

There is only one other girl sitting at my table. A pretty blonde with a sense of calmness and elegance around her. If she is excited or nervous, she doesn’t show.

I glance around the room. There are 3 other tables with two girls each. All of them seem to be paired up with a friend, their voices filling the room. Leana is sitting at a different table, happily chatting with another girl.

There are eight of us left. Seven if you exclude me.

We are the Elite. How crazy is that?

One of us is going to get married to the prince. Become his queen.

I know for a fact it isn’t going to be me. And I’m content with that.

Even if the prince and I would be the last two people on this planet, it still wouldn’t happen. We just don’t get along. Perhaps trying to shoot him with a paintball gun had been the cause of that. Or maybe we just weren’t compatible. Who knows? Who cares?

For some miraculous reason I had stumbled upon the kindest person there is. Someone who listens and makes me smile nonstop. Someone who makes me feel safe. I can still feel the ghost of that kiss on my lips.

“Tavi!”

I jump up from my chair immediately, just in time to see my brother run towards me. I kneel and he throws his arms around me.

Some tears escape, running down my cheeks.

Another pair of arms join in. Aria.

I pull both of them into a tight hug. They smell like home, a little dusty but with a hint of pinewood and cinnamon. More tears fall down my cheeks.

A hand lands on my shoulder. I let go of my little siblings and stand up to give my mom a hug. She can’t hold the tears back either. They fall on the fabric of my dress on my shoulder. I couldn’t care less about the stain they’ll leave behind. It’s just water so it will dry eventually.

The only thing I care about now is my family. Here. With me.

*****

"Good morning."

All my muscles tense at the sound of that voice.

Please don't let it be directed to us.

Please go to a different table.

We've managed to not speak to each other for so long, why ruin it now?

But unfortunately the person stops walking, his presence looming over me as he stands still behind my chair.

The expression on my mom's face tells me she wished for him to keep walking too. A nervous laugh escapes. No she is definitely not feeling comfortable with the prince this nearby. I wonder if it's because of his royal status. Or maybe there is a different cause for her to not be at ease.

Because the man looking at her now may be the only person in all of Illéa who could do something for my dad.

It seems my little sister and brother are the only ones in this family who know how to properly act in social situations.

Aria gives the prince a friendly smile, "hello." Arlan waves as a way of greeting. I feel a tinge of pride at the sight of them. They're 12 and 9 years old respectively but they apparently know better how to be polite than us.

"How are you all doing today?" Okay so he is going to have a chat with us? What have I done to deserve this?

My mom manages to reply, "it's nice to see our Tavi again." Her eyes lock with mine. There is a hint of sadness there, but for the most part her eyes are filled with warmth. Just looking at her reminds me of home.

I reach for her hand and give it a little squeeze, letting her know she is not alone in this situation. Hopefully the gesture takes some of the unease away, even though I myself wish I could run away from this conversation. I don't understand why he felt the need to come over. Couldn't he go have a talk with the girls he actually liked?

I try to relax a little but that's easier said than done. Regardless of how I feel, I know I need to say something at some point. "Allow me to introduce my family. My mom Viola, my sister Aria and my brother Arlan," I say, motioning my hand at each of them even though it's clear who's who.

The prince takes a couple of steps in my family's direction. My eyes follow his every move. If he tries to hurt them in any way, I will ...

But he simply holds out his hand to each of them. My mom first, she shakes his hand. Her eyes shift to me for a split second, the unease is easy to read. Then she lets go of his hand. My siblings shake his hand in turn.

Then he turns to me. It's first time we've had eye contact since that date. "I think later today Hugo has something planned if that's alright."

My heart starts racing right at the moment Hugo’s name leaves his mouth. I can do nothing but stare at the prince. I blink my eyes at him. "Hugo?" I try to discreetly take some deep breaths, willing my heart to slow down. "What kind of plan?"

"I promised I wouldn't tell." I don't know what surprises me more, the fact that the prince is in on this mysterious plan or the smile that is now on his face. I blink my eyes again, perhaps I'm just imagining this? But no, the smile remains. And for some reasons it feels like he knows something. Did someone tell him about that kiss? Did anyone overhear our conversation in the garden? Or perhaps the conversation during our dance?

I glance around the room, scanning every face. But my eyes can't find Hugo.

"Who's Hugo?" Aria's voice fills the silence. How am I going to explain this? I turn back to find her looking at the prince. That's somewhat of a relief, let him explain then. My mom's eyes however have settled on me and when I look at her, I know she's noticed my looking around.

"He's my cousin. He and Tavi are friends."

My gaze immediately shifts to the prince. He's still smiling at my sister. I don’t understand how on earth he would know about this friendship. I know I have never mentioned it to him. So that can only mean ...

"How did you meet him?" Aria asks, her full attention is now on me.

"Uhm," I twirl some hair around my finger, "there was this photography thing."

She opens her mouth to ask more but someone else beats her to it. Arlan asks, "is this your house?"

My little brother, my saviour. I am not ready for an Aria interrogation. Especially not with the prince present. Oh dear god no, that would have been awful.

From the corner of my eye, I see the prince nodding his head at my little brother. "Yeah, it is."

Aria holds my stare. There is a challenge in her eyes, a mischievous grin on her face. I will most certainly hear about this later.

"Cool," Arlan replies, "it's so big."

Yeah especially if you compare to our little house back in Denbeigh.

My mom's voice makes me break the staring contest with Aria. I notice the friendly smile on her face. "I'm sorry, we don't mean to take up all of your time. Other people must want to speak with you as well." I know what she's doing. She's trying to make him leave. Whether it's for her own unease to disappear, or if it's because she's noticed that I'm not the biggest fan of the prince, I don't care. I appreciate the effort and I hope he gets the memo.

"A little too big, huh?" He replies to Arlan, followed by a light chuckle.

And now leave. Please.

He doesn't. He looks at my mom instead and shakes his head. "You aren't at all. It's always a pleasure to meet new people."

I can't believe my own ears. How is this the same person who asked me if I preferred to be called Queen or Princess? He had been such an asshole. Why is he so nice now?

"Do you also have lots of cars?" Arlan's voice is full of excitement and curiosity.

"Yeah we do, down in the garage. Have you been down there yet?" The prince replies, nodding along as he speaks.

Arlan's eyes grow bigger and bigger. "No. Are we allowed to?"

"Well, we should change that. Maybe Tavi and I or Tavi and Hugo can take you down there later." He turns his head in my direction.

I don't understand why he would even suggest that first pairing. Tavi and I. As if that is ever going to happen. You can’t tell me this prince wants to spend more time with me than he has to.

And that second pairing… Why is he bringing Hugo into this again?

I’m very capable of taking my little brother to see the cars without any help. But I do need to find out the general directions to the garage beforehand.

Arlan has gotten up from his chair and is now standing by my side, clutching my arm with his tiny hands. "Please Tavi please please."

My heart aches, I've missed him so much. I muss his hair, "yeah I guess."

The prince chuckles again. Seriously who is this? "Well, then I guess it's settled."

Arlan pushes my hand away and turns to the prince with a huge grin on his face, "cool." I watch him go back to his chair. Mom is smiling at him when he turns to her. "Mom, did you hear that? I get to go see the cars later?"

I turn to look at this friendly prince. I force a smile to my face, if only for making my brother this happy. "Uhm thanks, you just made his day."

He smiles in return, "no problem." He leans down, his head coming closer to mine. This may be the first civil conversation we've had, but that doesn't mean he can enter my personal space. "Hugo does need to see you in a bit though." His voice is a whisper only I can hear.

What is this plan?

I've never been a fan of surprises, or when things being kept hidden from me. Not since I've got the biggest surprise of my life. That day in the court room.

I just want to know everything that's going to happen. Always.

"I'll go find him later then."

I watch the prince nod his head. "Something tells me you'd rather have him meeting your family than me."

I don't tell him he's right though. This is not something I want to discuss with him. Not now, not ever. "What makes you say that?"

He smiles at me. "He's usually pretty straight forward with his feelings."

My cheeks heat immediately. What does this mean? Did Hugo talk to the prince about what happened? Because I'm pretty sure that what happened classified as treason. It doesn't make sense for him to discuss this with the person currently ruling the country, who also happens to be his family. The possibility of being punished looms over me. It feel like some scary monster is breathing down my neck. How am I going to get away with this?

And besides, Hugo never talked to me about whatever this is between us.

I think you make me happy.

That's all I got. Nothing more, nothing less. There are so many ways to interpret that sentence.

Like … Friends can make you happy too.

But he did kiss me back.

I'm overthinking this.

I blink at the prince who is still way to close for my liking. "Feelings?" I glance around the room again, but there is no sign of Hugo.

When I turn back, the prince has pulled away from me and I can finally breath again.

I vaguely hear the conversation between my mom and the prince. They’re talking about their rooms in the palace. Sounds like a safe and neutral conversation topic to me.

My mind keeps getting distracted, repeating the prince’s words over and over again.

Something tells me you'd rather have him meeting your family than me.

He's usually pretty straight forward with his feelings.

“Oh my god! Really?” Aria’s high-pitched voice snaps me out of my thoughts. She’s looking at the prince with heart-eyes, like he is some magical and wonderful fairy tale creature. I can’t help but roll my eyes at her. Sometimes she acts like someone way above her age, but other times I get reminded that she’s still a kid.

The prince laughs. He actually laughs. “Of course.” I take my eyes of my sister and focus on the prince instead. Who is this guy? He looks around the room and when he turns back to look at my siblings his voice is nothing more than a whisper. “Did anyone show you the playroom we have?”

“Playroom,” Aria and Arlan say at the same time. Their voices are filled with excitement.

I’m still watching the prince when he looks in my direction. “Maybe you can have Hugo show them where it is?”

I swear to god. How many times is he going to mention Hugo? If my mom hadn’t noticed it before then she’s surely aware of it now.

“Like now?” I don’t even see Hugo in this room. Do I really have to go find him just to show my siblings where the playroom is? I’m sure he has better things to do.

My siblings however will not let go of the promise of a playroom unless they actually get to visit it. Arlan’s attention is completely on me now, “please, I wanna go to the playroom.”

There is no way I can say no to his sad puppy dog eyes.

“Why can’t you show us?” Aria says to the prince, sounding very disappointed. “I like you better.”

I turn to face my sister, I can’t believe the words that leave her mouth. How can she like the prince? Sure, he has been nice during this chat, but this is legit the first time he’s been like this since I’ve been here.

Maybe he is just pretending to be nice. Trying to make a good impression on our families.

Or maybe he’s just in a good mood.

Who knows?

“I’m sorry, I have to stay here with the other guests. But maybe another time I can come with you.”

A feeling of relief washes over me. My sister however looks like she’s forced to eat the one thing she hates most, broccoli. “Oh okay.”

Mom runs a hand over Aria’s hair, trying to calm her down. I mean it’s not like the world is ending. “I can still take you,” I say as I shoot my sister a look, telling her to get her act together and behave like a normal human being. “If I knew where to go.”

“Oh, if you take a left outside the door it’s the third door on your right.”

I turn to the prince, nodding my head. “Okay thanks, will keep that in mind.”

Left, third door on the right. That’s not too hard.

“I guess we will go have a look,” my mom says, as little Arlan jumps up and down right next to her chair. “It was nice to meet you.” Her voice sounds genuine, but I wonder if she truly means the words.

“It’s been my pleasure. I’m happy you were able to come visit.” The prince has that smile on his face again.

I turn to face my mom instead, knowing very well what’s on her mind. I’m thinking the same thing, this family is missing a member. Two members, if you include my older brother. But I would have personally put Daniel on a plane back to Denbeigh if he would have come here when his wife back home had the flu.

Mom’s eyes become watery, she blinks a couple of times trying to hide it. “Of course, we wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”

My heart aches to see my mom like this. I reach for her hand and her eyes find mine. “I’ve missed you so much.”

“The last to reach the door is a loser.” Arlan’s voice is filled with mischief. Aria jumps down her chair, ready to start running.

Before either of them can do so much as blink their eyes, mom has gotten up from her chair and has grabbed them each by their wrist. “Definitely not.” She starts to guide them towards the door, out of the room.

I get up from my chair as well. When I pass the prince, I pat him on his shoulder, “great chat.”

My mom is waiting for me with Aria and Arlan on either side of her.

“Have fun, Tavi.”

I turn around to the prince one last time, “yeah you too.”

« POV switch to Tavi’s mom Viola »

I only let go of Aria and Arlan when we have left the room. They look at each other and run off together. Arlan is way faster than Aria, even though she is 3 years older than him. He would make a great athlete, if he hadn’t been born a Five. “Don’t go too far,” I call after them.

I fall into step with Tavi. My daughter who has always been so well at hiding her true feelings, all of her worries and troubles covered with a mask of calmness. She always tries to stay strong. There are only certain situations when her feelings are too intense to be controlled. Situations that bring back memories. Bad memories.

But seeing her now, she radiates joy and happiness.

Being selected and coming here really brought her back to life. A sparkle has returned in her eyes.

The sparkle that had disappeared 6 years ago.

The image of Caspar’s unconscious body being dragged out of that court room still haunts me every day. Shock had overtaken me then, freezing me in place. The only thing I could do was scream. If I could go back to that moment, I would fight and riot, anything to stop them from taking my husband away from me. But there is no way for me to go back. Not now, not ever. “You just need to give it time,” they all had said. “You’ll get over it.” It’s an easy thing to say if you have no clue what it’s like to lose someone like this.

“The prince seems like a nice guy,” I say, ending the comfortable silence around us.

Tavi scoffs, “yeah I guess.” The tone in her voice tells me that she is not too fond of him. I wonder why that might be.

“You don’t like him?” I ask even though I already know the answer. She had completely frozen up when he approached us during that family reception.

She shakes her head, “no, not really.”

“What about his cousin?” I turn my head a little. I keep my eyes trained on the little rascals running down the hall. I can’t lose them out of sight. They could get lost in this place. How would we ever find them again if that happens?

Her cheeks flush, “what about him?” The smile on her face gives her away. It warms my heart to see her like this, it has been too long and she deserves it.

When Caspar got arrested, he hadn’t been the only thing we lost.

I had lost the meaning of life altogether. Getting out of bed every morning is still a challenge, especially when seeing that the other side of the bed is untouched. It hurts. If it weren’t for my children, I don’t know what would have happened to me.

Tavi had lost her trust in people that day in the court room. Before, she had been such a social girl, always willing to help everyone. But after, the only people she trusted were her closest friends and family. Sometimes.

I reach for her hand, her fingers feel rough against my own skin. She must have continued playing her guitar here. Always striving for perfection.

It has been so quiet in the house without her despite the presence of two young children.

I missed the music she would play on her guitar followed by the occasional shit or fuck whenever she messed up a chord.

I missed the puddles of melting snow she would leave behind around the house, just because she never took of her shoes when coming back home.

I missed the mornings I would find her sleeping on the sofa because she couldn’t make it all the way to her bed after a night out.

I have missed my daughter.

But I know at some point Tavi is going to leave the safety of our home, to start her own life, independent from ours. Just like Daniel had done and just like Aria and Arlan will do some day in the future too.

The hall opens into a space with high ceilings, a wide staircase appearing right in front of us. I notice the hint of a smile on Tavi’s face as her gaze goes over the steps. A good memory perhaps?

“Mom?” Tavi says, as we watch Arlan run around the hallway. Aria is hiding behind one of the flowerpots and when her brother is close enough, she jumps into sight. They both show opposite emotions. Aria is laughing, content with herself that she scared her little brother. Arlan is on the verge of tears, his bottom lip already wobbling. But then he pokes her in the side, causing Aria to bend over. Apparently that was enough to please him because he’s already laughing again.

Kids.

“I think we’re lost.” Tavi chuckles softly. “Well maybe not lost, but we didn’t make it to the playroom.”

And now that she has mentioned it, I realize we were supposed to end in the playroom. The prince had made it sound like a short walk, just around the corner from the room that held the family reception.

“Let’s retrace our steps and start over,” I tell her. This place is very confusing, everything looks the same. And I know my daughter, Tavi is not that good at following directions. “Aria, Arlan! Come here.”

They come running to us right away. They’ve been raised well.

« Back to Tavi’s POV »

We’ve made our way back to the reception room. Okay, now what did that prince say again?

I remember the first part clearly. Take a left outside of the doors.

But the second part is one big blurry memory. Which door was it again? And on which side?

I look to my mom, but she just shrugs. She has no idea either.

Great.

I guess that means I’m going to have to try all the doors then.

The first five doors on the left are all locked. I remember thinking that the directions to the playroom sounded so easy.

The playroom can’t be more than 5 doors away. It just can’t.

I try the other side. The first door opens but to my surprise it’s just a cleaning supply closet. Yeah, definitely not a playroom for kids.

The second door on the right side is locked. What kind of secrets could the royals be hiding behind these doors? Must be something interesting, for them to all be locked. Or perhaps all the rooms are empty.

I open the third door and Arlan pops his head inside first. “Playroom!”

I sigh in relief. Thank god, no more searching. Arlan pushes the door open further and runs in, followed by Aria. I turn to my mom, “I’m sorry, this shouldn’t have taken me this long to find. If only I had listened to …”

She reaches for my hand and squeezes it softly, “Tavi, it’s okay.” She lets go of my hand and walks through the door. “And look they don’t seem to mind either”

I follow her and close the door softly. Aria and Arlan have already found interesting things to play with. Kids. “They could have put up a sign or something. Playroom, this way. That would have made things so much easier.” I sigh. If I had only paid more attention to what the prince was saying. “At least now you got to see …”

“Hi.”

I recognize that voice immediately. It makes me forget what I was even saying to my mom. I turn to find you Hugo standing there. The smile on his face is different from the ones I’ve seen before. He looks a little nervous, perhaps?

“Oh hello,” a smile appears on my face immediately. I can do nothing to stop it.

“How’s your day going?” Hugo glances in a different direction, a smile on his face. When I follow his gaze, I find my siblings sitting on the floor. Aria has all sorts of coloured pencils scattered around her, while Arlan is making vroom vroom sounds as he pushes some little LEGO cars across the floor.

“It has been alright so far, thanks.” I look back at Hugo and tilt my head a little. “How's life for you?” The soft smile on his face as he watches my siblings makes me feel all warm inside. I can’t help but smile myself.

“I’ve been a little bit busy helping my sister move into her new apartment but that’s been fun. How have you been? I’m sure it’s been hectic around here.”

Ah, that explains why I haven’t seen him in the palace lately. I open my mouth to reply, but before I can so much as form a word my mom gasps loudly. I turn my head in the direction of the sound, but she’s already moving in the opposite direction. I quickly turn my head to see where exactly she’s going to.

A new person has entered the room.

What the …

Sunken cheeks and short-shaved hair.

When my mom falls into his arms, tears spill down his cheeks.

I can’t believe my own eyes. He looks different from the way I remember him, but that is still most certainly my dad. A lump forms in my throat, I can’t swallow it down even though I try. My hands start shaking and I feel like I can’t breathe.

He has one arm around my mom, his other arm is still open for me. I run over and his arm closes around me. I rest my head against his shoulder as all the tears I’ve been bottling up for the past 6 years run down my cheeks. There is no use in even trying to stop them, you can’t stop the Niagara Falls either.

Within a second, little arms close around my leg. Aria and Arlan join in on the hug. We are one big emotional mess at this point. My mom is shaking next to me. My dad coming here might have hit her the hardest. She hasn’t seen her husband for 6 years. He tries to soothe her, even when he is having a hard time himself.

My dad doesn’t smell like home anymore, no pinewood and no cinnamon.

His skin looks so fragile, almost the same colour as a piece of paper.

Denbeigh isn’t a province with a lot of sunshine, but our skins look tanned compared to his. It looks like he hasn’t seen the sun in a very long time. 6 years perhaps? He has lost some weight, his cheeks are a little sunken. Same with his eyes. But the warmth and love in his gaze as he looks at us is still there. At least they hadn’t taken that away from him.

I feel the soft pressure of a hand landing on my shoulder, followed by a whisper. “I can step out into the hall to give you some privacy.”

Hugo’s voice reminds me of the prince’s words from earlier.

I think later today Hugo has something planned if that's alright.

Hugo does need to see you in a bit though.

I let go of my family and wiggle out of the tangled mess of arms. “You did this?” Tears are still escaping from my eyes when I turn to look at Hugo. I try to wipe them away, but there’s too many of them and they’re falling way too fast. “This was your plan?”

The tears make my vision go blurry so I can’t really see the expression on his face. But the concern is very present in his voice. “Arin helped make it happen.”

I quickly close the distance between us and wrap my arms around him. “Thank you.” My voice is hoarse and shaky as more tears run down my cheeks. I can’t believe someone would ever do something like this for me and my family.

Hugo’s arms close around me and it’s the nicest feeling in the entire world. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“It's okay,” I manage to get out despite the lump still being very present in my throat. There are so many emotions going through me right now. There is sadness as I realize how much I’ve missed my dad. I can still see his body being dragged out of the courtroom. I wasn’t able to do nothing but watch as a guard held me back. But there is also happiness flowing through me. It feels so great to see my dad, to hug him again. To know that he’s still alive.

Hugo keeps hugging me, holding me close until the worst of my shaking is over. When he lets go, I’ve got myself somewhat under control. The Niagara Falls running down my cheeks have dried up. I wipe the last of my tears away. My eyes are probably all puffy and red.

What a sight.

I don’t care.

“Do you want to be alone?” Hugo asks softly. I look up to find him watching my family. Mom is clutching on to my dad’s arm. She is not going to let go of him for the short time they now have together.

One final tear escapes, I reach up and quickly wipe it away. “But you haven't met them yet.” This may very well be the only opportunity for anyone to meet my dad face-to-face. My heart aches at the thought of him being locked up in St. George again. I hope we’ll get another chance to see him in the future.

“Octavia?” It’s the first thing my dad has said since he entered the room. He’s the only person in the world who calls me by my full name. The only exception being the people who called me Lady Octavia, but I had made sure to put an end to that as soon as possible.

Every time someone called me Octavia made me think of my dad and that was just too much to handle.

I go to stand by my dad’s side and he puts an arm around me. Why can’t he stay with us forever? I clear my throat softly, hoping my voice will sound normal again. “This is my dad Caspar, my mom Viola, Aria, and here's Arlan.” I place a hand on my younger brother’s head. His hair is still sticking out in all possible direction from when I had mussed it earlier.

Dad pulls his arm away from where it had been resting on my shoulder and holds his hand out for Hugo to shake. There is a slight hint of hesitation on my dad’s face, like he’s prepared for a rejection.

“I’m Hugo, it’s nice to meet you sir.” I watch them shake hands. The gesture may seem small, but it means a lot to me. And by the way my dad’s shoulders relax, I can tell it also means a lot to him.

He’s a well-known criminal, locked up for murder. I’d understand if people would feel uncomfortable shaking his hand. But Hugo does it anyway, without flinching, without hesitating. My heart swells with happiness.

“Likewise.” Dad reaches for mom’s hand and intertwines their fingers. “I can't thank you enough for doing this for us.”

A couple of weeks ago I had told Brooke that I believe in soulmates. Seeing my parents right here and now, holding hands with their fingers intertwined, is all the proof I need. Even after 6 years of separation, with no face-to-face contact, the love is still there. They are soulmates.

I nod my head in agreement, “same.” I keep my eyes on my parents. My dad is creating little circles on the palm of mom’s hand with his thumb. Her face lights up. There is nothing but love in her eyes when she looks at her husband.

“No thanks is needed. This isn’t about me at all.”

I shake my head, Hugo doesn’t seem to realize just how much this means to any of us. To me. We have been saving money for years, but we are still nowhere near the amount needed for the plane tickets. And now he’s here. “All thanks are needed.”

Dad lets go of mom’s hand and kneels on the floor. Aria and Arlan immediately throw their arms around him. “Look how much you've grown.” The last time he saw them, Aria had been 6 years old and Arlan had been 3.

He hadn’t been there to see them grow up. He had been ripped away from us.

I bite down on the inside of my cheek to stop myself from crying again. I don’t want to spend the little time we’ve been given with my dad, feeling sad and crying.

A soft touch on my hand distracts me from the feelings trying to drown me again. I look down to find my hand covered by Hugo’s. A small smile appears on my face. Again, such a small gesture, but it gives me the comfort I need.

“I've heard a lot about you, Hugo.” My mom’s words make me blush. What is she insinuating? That I talk about him all the time? Because that is not true. I might have mentioned him a couple of times during our phone calls, but I never gave her many details. “The prince mentioned you a couple of times when we met him. You seem like a good friend for our Tavi.” The smile on her face when she looks at Hugo is genuine.

I feel his head turn in my direction and when I look up, he’s smiling at me. “You've mentioned me? I hope it wasn't about what happened on the stairs.”

It surprises me that he’s bringing this up now. The memory of that day comes back to mind, it makes me laugh. One of my favourite memories of my time here. “Of course not. What would they think of you when they hear about my great victory?”

“What happened on the stairs?” Of course Aria is the one asking for more information. She has always been very nosy. If she hadn’t been born a Five, and if we hadn’t gone through such awful experiences with that specific profession in the past, she would have made a great journalist one day.

“I slid down the bannister with your sister but then I fell.”

From the corner of my eye I see my parents sharing a look. When I turn to them, their expression says it all. What did you do now? But they don’t seem to be disappointed or angry. The corners of my dad’s mouth are slightly curled upwards, while my mom has raised her eyebrows. They are surprised but they seem pleased to hear I’m having some sort of fun here.

Aria’s laughter fills the air, “you fell?” What happened to little miss I like the prince better? She seems to have forgotten about his existence altogether.

“And let's not forget to mention that it was a race and I won.” I tuck some hair behind my ear, smiling brightly. Winning that bannister thing has definitely been my greatest accomplishment here. That does remind me of something else, a minor detail that had somehow slipped from my mind. I turn to Hugo and softly whisper so only he can hear, “you still owe me a song for that by the way.”

Hugo laughs, a sound I will never get enough of. He whispers back, “I don’t think you’ll ever let me forget.” He turns to my parents, his voice at a normal intensity again. “She beat me before I fell.”

I can’t help but whisper something back. “I will remind you for as long as you'll keep me around.”

When I focus back on my family again, my dad is smiling at me. It’s nice to see him in a good mood, like he’s forgetting about the jail situation for a minute. I smile back but then my attention goes to my younger siblings. Aria nudges Arlan with her elbow before looking up at mom. “Can we do it too?”

Arlan clutches onto mom’s leg, “mom please?”

She looks down at the two of them. She also has a smile on her face. This is such a good day for the Hayes family. She softly bops each of them on their noses. “Maybe another time, okay?”

Aria and Arlan look a bit upset, but thankfully they don’t cause a scene.

A soft whisper only meant for my ears, “it’s okay, I’ll win next time.” As if. And then he says to my younger siblings. “The banisters aren’t going anywhere, don’t worry.” My heart might actually melt.

I shake my head to emphasize my whispered words, “no you won't.”

“Tavi.” When I turn to look up at him, I notice the hint of a blush on his face. “They're looking at us.” He murmurs the words, but I get the message loud and clear.

Indeed, when I look at my parents, I find their eyes on us. “Oh,” I take a small step away from Hugo, not wanting him to feel uncomfortable in any way. He literally just met my parents.

Arlan and Aria appear to be in the middle of a poking competition. I know how this is going to end, one of them will be upset while the other is feeling content. Mom knows it too. She breaks them up before they can hurt each other. “I think we may need to go entertain these rascals.”

My dad words my very thoughts. “Before this ends in tears.”

Arlan looks up at my mom, the poking competition with his sister has already been forgotten. He pats her on the knee. “Can we go do something fun now?”

Mom bops him softly on his nose. “Yes honey, we're going now.”

That’s all the information my siblings needed. They share a look and start running towards the door. Aria is the first to arrive and she sticks out her tongue at Arlan. “You're the loser now.” Kids.

“It was a pleasure meeting you.” My dad says as he reaches for my mom’s hand, intertwining their fingers again. I can only wish to find a love like theirs one day.

“You as well, sir.” And to my mom, Hugo says, “it was nice to meet you too.” That earns him a smile from her.

My dad’s eyes land on me, “Octavia, are you coming with us?” He raises an eyebrow, “or are you staying here?”

I feel my cheeks heat up again, understanding fully well what he’s insinuating. Staying here with Hugo. I shake my head quickly, “no no, I'm coming with you.” But not yet. “One second though.”

My mom chuckles softly as she pulls dad with her towards to the door. I turn to Hugo, “thank you, really. I don't know how I can ever repay you for this.”

This is by far the nicest and most thoughtful thing anyone has ever done for me and my family. It means the absolute world to me.

He watches my parents leave. As soon as the door falls shut, he reaches for my hand. “You never have to. Your happiness is all I could ask for.”

I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Or maybe both. At the same time. I look down, his hand has closed around mine. “I'll be grateful forever.”

“Forever is a long time.”

Those words make me question whether I said the wrong thing. I didn’t mean to make it sound like literally forever. I meant it just to show how much today means to me and that I will never forget about it. But I still feel like I said something wrong, so instead I go for a bit of a lighter tone. “Remember what I said about the afterlife? How my ghost is going to find your ghost to talk about the bannister thing?” I stop talking, trying to order my thoughts. I’m rambling and perhaps whatever I’m saying doesn’t make any sense. I need to get to my point. “My ghost will also remind you of how thankful I am.”

He laughs and relief floods over me, at least he understands that I was joking. “I hope that’s a promise.” Or maybe not?

I tear my gaze away from our hands and look up instead. The soft smile on Hugo’s face makes me forget how to talk. My mind goes absolutely blank. “Really?” My voice is barely more than a whisper.

He squeezes my hand and it reminds me that this is really happening. It’s not a dream. “Really. I promise.”

The smile on my face keeps growing bigger and bigger. I didn’t think it was possible for one person to make me feel this happy, but here we are. “Hugo.” I bring my free hand up and tuck some hair behind my ear. “I like you.” A lot. I swallow that last bit down. It’s stupid to even bring this up with the selection going on and that contract and treason. But I know in my heart that what  is true.

“I like you too.” His voice is a whisper and I wonder if I even heard him correctly. But the soft expression on his face supports the words I think I’ve heard. “And I like seeing you happy,” he adds as his eyes go to the ground.

My heart starts racing and I feel like crying again. But this time it’s not a combination of sadness and happiness. No. If I’d allow myself to cry right now, it would only be happy tears. But if I start crying now, I might never stop. “You cause most of my happiness.” I keep quiet for a second, giving myself the opportunity to realize what is happening. “You deserve to be happy too.”

Hugo looks back up at me again, searching my face for something. I can only blink, having no clue what it is he’s looking for. “Right now I've never been happier.”

I bite down on the inside of my cheek as the intense urge to kiss him fills my entire body. I really want to kiss him. But the one thing I want more is for him to kiss me first this time. I keep biting down on my cheek, that spot will be sensitive for a couple of days now. When I feel like I’ve got myself under control, I allow myself to speak. “I'm glad to hear that.”

He squeezes my hand, then softly says, “I wish I could capture the way your eyes light up when you're happy.”

I didn’t know my eyes did that. No one has ever mentioned it before, or maybe that’s because I can’t remember the last time I had truly felt happy. And the happiness surging through me now is a feeling I’ve never felt before. I chuckle softly, not really knowing what to say to that. I’m not used to these kind words. “Maybe you should take a mental picture then.”

Hugo squeezes my hand once again, “I already have.”

These 3 words cause an error in my brain and I don’t know what to say. My face heats up right away, turning bright red. That must be such a wonderful sight to see. I take a little step closer to Hugo and when I’m close enough I rest my head against his chest. “I don't know how to respond to that.”

He lets go of my hand and wraps his arms around me. “It’s okay, you don’t have to. This right here is enough.”

I like this, being here with him. I feel warm and appreciated and safe and all because of him. Any tension in body disappears, my muscles relax and I let out a breath. I don’t want this moment to end. But then I remember my parents, who are probably still waiting for me just outside of that door. “I should probably go and entertain my family.” I don’t move though, I’m not ready for this to end.

Hugo nods his head. I don’t see it, but I can feel the slightest movement of his body as his head goes up and down. The words he says don’t match his actions. “Will you wait just a little longer?”

“Only because you asked so nicely.” I chuckle softly. What’s another few minutes. And besides, my mom and dad get some nice one-on-one time now that I’m distracted elsewhere. Though that also depends on what Aria and Arlan are doing but, knowing them, they’re probably running around the hallways.

He huffs a laugh. “I don’t think there’s another way to ask. Especially when it comes to you.”

There are many ways to ask actually. All with a different vibe hidden behind the words, but I don’t point it out. I put my arms around him instead, holding on tight. “What do you mean? Especially when it comes to me?”

Hugo laughs a little, “I just don’t think there’s another way to ask. How could anyone every consider being anything but nice to you?”

“I can name a few people.” And right on top of that list would be the wonderful prince Arin. He had not been nice to me with his awful words. And I had not been nice to him when I had aimed that paintball gun at him, still hurt by what he had said during the car ride. Perhaps if I didn’t hold grudges like that, my life would be so much more enjoyable. I sigh, “but I haven't been the nicest to them either, even if some of them deserved it.” There were also a lot of people who hadn’t deserved my yelling. Leana for example. I had pushed my pride aside and apologized to her and now I might even consider her a friend.

“We all have our moments. No one is perfect.”

“I'd like to believe that yes.” I let go of Hugo a little when I realize just how tight I’ve been hugging him. “But I have those not-so-nice-moments at times.” Though I must admit that I haven’t been in a bad mood at all recently. I wonder why that might be?

“Not every moment has to be good.” He steps away a bit. “If anything the bad moments just make the good moments feel more special.”

“Yeah okay,” I nod my head a little, wanting to close this new distance between us. “I guess you have a point.”

Hugo reaches up and brushes some hair out of my face, tucking it behind my ear. My heart is racing again. “And right now is a good moment.”

I look up at him and my eyes lock with his. I feel so many things all at once. But I’m sure of one thing: today might very well be the best day of my life. “Hmmm I'm not so sure it's a good one to be honest.”

He raises his eyebrows and for a short moment there is concern in his eyes before he realizes I’m joking. “What would make it better?”

“Hmm,” I pretend to think about it, even when I already know my answer. I shrug instead, “I don’t know.” I have to bite down on my lip to supress the strong wanting to kiss him. I might very well repeat what happened during the ball if I don’t stop myself.

But I actually want him to kiss me first now.

A little blush spreads all over his face. He leans down and kisses my cheek gently.

When he pulls back again, I poke his chest softly with my finger. “Hm interesting.” I don’t know how I manage to keep my voice this calm, because there is utter chaos inside of me. I feel anything but calm. “All of a sudden the moment becomes a little bit better.”

Hugo lets out a small laugh. “I try my best.”

Hearing his laugh again makes me smile. I stand up on my tiptoes, no longer able to stop myself from kissing him. But then in the last moment, the destination changes and my kiss lands on his cheek.

When I stand down on the floor again, I look up at him. Hugo’s eyes have gone wide and he’s not moving at all. He looks like a statue. The sight of him makes me laugh, “what?”

His face turns a little bit more red. “I just wasn’t expecting you to do that.”

“Oh,” I raise my eyebrows playfully. “You didn't like it?”

The smile he gives me is a little bashful, but I like it. He looks so cute. “No, I liked it.”

“Okay, I will keep that in mind then.” I’m having a very hard time controlling myself, I don’t know why I even try. I just want to kiss him.

I softly poke his chest 4 times.

Please.

Kiss.

Me.

Now.

He leans down, placing another kiss on my cheek. When he pulls away, he has a weird expression on his face. I try to read it, but I can’t. I raise my eyebrows at him as I’m trying to make sense of the look he’s giving me. “What's that face?”

Hugo doesn’t reply. Instead he leans down again. I’m prepared for another kiss on the cheek but then his lips find mine. It surprises me but in a good way.

My hands stay on his chest as I kiss him back. I can feel his heartbeat right under my hand. Or maybe I’m wrong and it’s my own heart as it continues beating, the frequency increasing with every second that passes. I close my hands and gently pull him closer to me by the soft fabric of his shirt.

Hugo’s hands go up to cup my cheeks, holding me in place. As if I would go anywhere. Besides to the floor maybe if the muscles in my legs decide to go mushy.

But there honestly is no place I’d rather be right now.

He lowers one of his hands to my neck, while the other stays where it is.

His fingers softly touch the skin in my neck, sending a new sensation through my entire body.

He pulls away and that is probably for the better because I need to catch my breath. My heart continues thundering in my chest. “See, now that was a good moment.” I open my hands to let go of his shirt. The fabric is now wrinkled where my hands had been just a minute ago. I try to smooth it over, willing the wrinkles to disappear.

“Like all the moments I've had with you. Even when I fell,” he says, laughing a bit breathlessly.

The memory comes back. I had been an amateur without any experience. I had risked my life when sliding down that bannister. Yet somehow I had survived without a scratch. The same couldn’t be said about the supposed expert. I shake my head a little, laughing softly at the memory. “How was that a good moment?”

“We found your iPod, didn't we?” Hugo shrugs.

“Correction: you found my iPod. I thought you had gone crazy and you were seeing things that weren't really there.”

A weird grimace appears on his face, one I can’t quite place. “Maybe, but if it hadn't been for you I wouldn't have slid down the bannister in the first place.”

I poke his chest softly again, right above the still wrinkled fabric. “You were the one to challenge me to do that.”

He nods, “yeah, I was. But I think I learned my lesson.”

I drop my hands, letting my arms rest by my side. I fidget the fabric of my dress between my fingers. “No more bannister sliding for you?”

“Well, not after I let your brother and sister beat me at it.” Hugo raises his eyebrows at me.

My heart melts quicker than the sun could melt a snowman. I didn’t think he would have remembered that part of the conversation. Or that he would be willing to do that for my siblings. “Really?”

“Yes,” he nods his head. “It's frowned upon to beat children.”

Oh. Is it frowned upon to beat children? Whenever I play boardgames with Aria and Arlan, I never let them win. Maybe it’s because I’m a pretty competitive person and I always want to win myself. I prefer to lose a fair and honest game than to win because someone else lets me win.

I shake my head, because that wasn’t what I meant. “I didn't realize you would actually do that for them. And just so you know, they're very much like me. They will never shut up about their grand victory.” Aria legit brings up the times she beat me at Uno even though that has happened months ago.

“Well, I can admire their dedication I guess.” His eyes shift to something behind me. The door. “I think our just-a-little-longer is up.”

“Yeah you're probably right.” I turn to look at the door. I have no clue how long they have been waiting for me, but I do know it’s been longer than the one second I promised. “I should go.”

Hugo takes a step away from me, creating a distance between us. “Have fun for me?”

“Of course.” A smile appears on my face immediately. “Thank you. For everything.” I don’t think I will ever stop saying those words.

He smiles at me in return, a sparkle in his eyes. “I’ll see you later, Tavi.”

I turn and head for the door. Once I’ve reached it, I look back at Hugo one more time. “Bye.”

He raises his hand to wave, murmuring a bye in return.

I open the door and quickly slip out of the playroom, softly closing the door behind me. To my surprise the only one in the hallway waiting for me is Aria. She has mischievous grin on her face. “Where are mom and dad?” I ask her.

“Dad wanted some fresh air, so they went to the gardens.” She keeps smirking at me, “you said one second. But you were in there for at least 15 minutes. What were you doing?”

I start walking in the direction of the big entry hall. Maybe if I’m quick enough, Aria will be so busy trying to keep up that she forgets to ask questions. “Nothing, just thanking him for bringing dad here.”

My plan doesn’t work. My younger sister is practically running but that doesn’t seem to bother her, she can keep up with me quite easily. “That’s not what I heard.”

I grab her by her arm and force her to stop walking, turning her in such a way that she’s facing me. “You were eavesdropping?” Oh god, did she listen to everything? Did she hear everything?

She narrows her eyes, the smirk is still on her face. She purses her lips and makes multiple kissing sounds.

“Aria!” I glance around the hallway. If someone hears her, I might be in big trouble. I let go of Aria’s arm and start walking again, trying to remove myself from this situation.

“Tavi and Hugo sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S …”

My cheeks heat up, “Aria, shut it!”

She doesn’t listen to me. “… I-N-G!”

I throw in a desperate attempt to keep her quiet. “I will tell everyone about what you wrote in your diary if you don’t stop.” The truth is I had only read a few pages and not the entire thing, but she doesn’t need to know that now.

Aria crosses her arms, scoffing. But when I look in her direction, I notice her eyes have gone a little bigger and there is a hint of fear there. “That was private.”

I raise my eyebrows at her. She doesn’t seem to realize that she had been eavesdropping on a private matter too. But she does keep quiet now for which I’m glad. Though I’m sure this isn’t the last I’ve heard of it. She will definitely bring it up later again, but that’s a problem for future me.

We find the rest of our family outside, enjoying the beautiful flowers on this warm summer day.

“Can we go to the beach?”

We spend the rest of the day on the beach, enjoying the salty air. Aria and Arlan have taken off their shoes. They’re jumping over the waves.

Dad shows us his gun shot wound. It hasn’t healed nicely at all, he’ll have to live with that ugly scar forever.

“How did they get a gun inside?” I ask. It makes no sense to me. I thought prisons are supposed to have strict security protocols and a gun is not something you can smuggle in very easily.

“One of the officers got paid by an inmate to bring in all sorts of contraband.” There is worry in his eyes. “Drugs, cigarettes, cell phones, and guns.”

And that is supposed to be a maximum-security prison. I don’t know how my dad survived 6 years in that place. A lump forms in my throat as the realization hits me that he might not make it till the end of his sentence. Especially with those corrupted officers there. It sounds like hell.

I run my fingers through the warm sand. “Did they find that officer?”

Dad nods his head, “They did. Even started an internal investigation. Four other officers got fired as well. They forced inmates to deal drugs for them.”

I let out a breath. There is so much going wrong in this country. If only someone would do something about it.

For some time, the only sound we hear is the crashing of the waves as they wash up on the beach and the screeching of seagulls as they fly high above us in the sky. We watch Arlan fall face first into the water, his clothes completely soaked. Mom gets up to see if he’s okay. When she gets close to him, Arlan starts splashing water at her. Her laugh fills the air as she splashes water at him back.

I grab something out of my pocket. Something I keep with me at all times now, in fear of losing it again. I untangle the earphones and then hold them out to my dad. “Want to hear some of my band’s music?”

Five Whispers, our band, has been together for a little over 3 years now. But with my dad being gone, he has never heard us play. “I thought you’d never ask.”

He puts the earphones in as I switch on my iPod. I scroll through the list of albums until I find our own one. I select the first song, Back to Yesterday. It’s a song about wanting to go back to the happy moments in your past. Reliving those joyful memories over and over again.

I watch my dad as he listens to the song. He bobs his head on the beat. When the song ends, he looks over at me and he is silent for a second, tears in his eyes. “I’m so proud of you, Octavia. Look at all that you’ve achieved.”

Hearing him say those words, breaks something inside me. A tear falls down my cheek. I quickly reach up to wipe it away.

The next song starts playing, Toothpicks and Whiskey. This one is about friendship, how unusual things sometimes just work together. I think of my best friends, Lola and Gina. My bandmembers, Felix, Gill and Bjorn. I miss them all so much.

“Great bass riff,” my dad says as he puts his arm around my shoulders. “How long did it take you to master it?”

“Long!” I laugh at the memory of so many frustrations as I kept messing it up. I was so close to throwing my guitar out of a window. But I had kept going. Trying time and time again, until the muscles in my arms were so sore, I could barely move them anymore.

We spend the rest of the day at the beach. Talking, listening to more music, or just simply enjoying each other’s company.

Why can’t we stay like this forever?

Why does my dad have to leave again?

*****

I find myself in the library with a collection of law books piled on the table in front of me. My family is still here but given that my mom and dad also haven’t seen each other in 6 years I feel like they deserve some privacy. I left Arlan and Aria in the playroom on my way to the library. It’s all they seemed to care about anyway.

Now that my dad is here and he has told some stories about life in prison, my motivation to help him has quadrupled. He really needs to get out of that place. I don’t know how he would survive the remainder of his sentence. Another 39 years.

I’ve read the same sentence at least 5 times now, but the words still don’t make any sense. Why can’t these authors, or whoever puts these books together, write clear descriptions, instead of all these difficult and confusing words. What’s the point of writing books if no one is going to understand anything in the text?

“Hello! Octavia, is it?”

I quickly place a finger on the confusing sentence I had just been reading. When I look up an unknown man is standing near my table, his hands behind his back. There is a polite smile on his face.

“Uhm yeah. Hi?”

The man seems friendly enough, though I can’t say I’ve ever seen his face before. He extends a hand towards me. “Aran Jacobson, Reggie's uncle?” Reggie? Reggie? Oh right, Leana’s friend. “Sorry if I'm interrupting.”

“Oh it's okay.” I shake his hand. “Can I help you with something?”

He smiles again, shaking his head. “No, not really.” His gaze lands on the pile of books in front of me. “I just never know if I should warn people against getting into law, or not.”

“Oh,” I raise my eyebrows in curiosity. “Why would people need to be warned for that?” I can think of a couple of reasons, especially after everything that happened with my dad. I feel like the law was stretched a little thin when he got arrested that day in the court room. Or perhaps the judge found some loopholes he could use to his own advantage.

“It's just more fun on TV, trust me.” Mister Jacobson chuckles a little. He tilts his head, “but you're the musician right?”

I blink at him in surprise. I mean I guess he’s right, I just wasn’t aware that my entire existence can be summarized in two single words. The musician. “I guess I am the musician, yeah.” I shake my head a little as I continue speaking, “no career switch, I'm just trying to expand my knowledge.” I pat the pile of books I’ve collected. Some dust flies upwards as my hand comes down on the covers.

Mister Jacobson clears his throat. “I happen to be a lawyer myself. Mostly Pro Bono cases lately...” Oh. Oh. “I hope you don't mind me bringing it up, but I read about your father.” The smile he gives me is sympathetic. “I'm sorry that happened.”

“Oh.” I look down at the law books. This is not a situation I want to be in. Firstly, because the man is a lawyer. I can hear the rejections from all the lawyers back in Denbeigh again as they pointed us to the door. Helping you would hurt our reputation. Or it’s no use fighting a battle that’s already lost. And secondly because he mentions my dad. I don’t know what he has read but it couldn’t have been pretty. “Yeah.”

He pulls a chair out and sits down. “Is it alright if I ask a couple questions?”

I let out a breath. “Why?” The pages of the book move a little as I run my fingers over it. The paper is so smooth. No tears. No wrinkles.

“Well, I read the case. And some things didn't quite... add up.”

I look back up again. Some things didn’t quite add up. Could this man possibly be on my side? My dad’s side? “Like what?”

Mister Jacobson bobs his head. “Like, there was no trail. He just happened to be in the courtroom for an unrelated case. Not to mention there's no note of any reason why he should be located so far away.”

The things he’s saying, his words, are exactly what I’ve been wondering about for years now. I could never make sense of any of it all. And people had not been the most willing to help me. “No one wanted to tell me why he had to go to St. George, I've asked so many people.”

He frowns at that, “I see.” Something about his expression changes, “does he have a lawyer?”

I shake my head, feeling a little embarrassed. I’m aware that the first step, and probably the most important one, would be to hire a lawyer. But that was easier said than done. “No, he doesn't have one.”

I watch mister Jacobson as his hand goes to his pocket. When his hand comes back to the table, there is something in it. A business card. He smiles a little as he holds it out to me. “I would love to help.”

Why would anyone want to help us? Especially now. After 6 years. I don’t understand. I take his little card anyway and flip it over in my hand. “Really?”

“I won't make false promises, yet I think it's at least possible to get him relocated closer by.”

I close my hand around the card, I’m never going to let go of this. “That would already mean a lot.” A transfer. While I don’t know what the other prisons in Illéa are like, I’m sure they can’t be worse than the hell hole they have been holding him in for the past 6 years. A transfer would also mean my family would get the opportunity to go visit him. Perhaps that would make the remainder of his sentence a little more bearable.

“Good.” When I look back up again, mister Jacobson is smiling. “Then I suggest you discuss it with your family, or legal guardian,” he nods to his business card in my hand, “before giving me a call or sending me a message.” His expression turns a little more serious. “Then we can go over the files, the options,” his gaze goes to my pile of law books, “and any personal notes you might have.”

I’m not sure my personal notes would make much of a difference. “Okay, thank you.” A small smile appears on my face. I can’t believe there is finally someone willing to help us.

He pushes himself up from the chair. “I'll hear from you then.” He smiles at me kindly. Perhaps not all lawyers are insensitive assholes. “Good luck, Octavia.” A second later he snaps his fingers, quite a loud sound in the silent library. “And see you at dinner of course!”

“Thank you again.” I bring one hand up and tuck some hair behind my ear. “Enjoy the rest of your stay here.”

“Likewise.” He nods a goodbye with a polite smile on his face before he turns to leave.

I focus back on the book laying open in front of me, I’ve lost the part I had been reading before mister Jacobson arrived. My left hand is still closed around his business card.

He probably has no idea that he has just given me one of the greatest gifts of all time.

A glimmer of hope.

 ((All credits go to Anna, bringing Tavi’s dad to the palace was her idea!!!))

[evalinkatrineberg]

Family

A/N: In which @arin-schreave meets the Bergs. Only 10k words this time. Includes bad hand puns because Anna made a typo that I thought was intention. In conclusion, I am a dumbass.

It was almost too easy to be swept back into old family rhythms as we chatted at the reception. Half the time, it felt like I had never even left, like I had just been away for a night or two, sleeping over at a friend’s house, but at the same time, it felt like I was meeting my family for the first time, as if they had just adopted me, and were filling me in on the family secrets.

“You’ve missed a lot,” Lydia informed me, her face dead serious, but filled with energy as she looked at me. Behind her, our mother nodded, folding her hands in front of her as she looked around the room at the other families. There was an interesting mix of people in the room, I had to admit, though it seemed like most families were keeping to themselves, just as we were now.

“So, fill me in,” I instructed, rocking back and forth on my feet from my heels to my toes once as I looked at my sister again.

“Okay, well,” she began, pointing at our father, “we know it’s early, but Father packed some birthday presents for you, so don’t let us forget that!”

I narrowed my eyes at my father, who stood to my side, completely straight faced. “You didn’t have to do that!” I knew that more likely than not, I was still going to be here for my birthday, but there was always the chance I would be sent home before then. I was painfully aware of that, especially with Christina bringing back more and more rumors about the other girls’ relationships with Arin each time she came to my room. Somebody saw him kissing Lady Jen last night. Well, I heard that he and Lady Clemence were pretty cozy today. Do you see the way that Lady Leana looks at him? Somebody saw Lady Regina in his office earlier. I still can’t believe that Lady Idalia touched his face at the ball. Did you hear that he and Lady Melissa kissed? I haven’t seen him with Lady Octavia recently.

Every time she said something, I couldn’t help but look at my phone. I was beginning to wonder if asking for his number had been a bad idea. I was so used to being the one to leave others on read, that having his number, but him not starting any conversations felt like a complete turn of the table to me. Maybe we really were never going to be more than friends. I’d have to accept that and move on, if that was the case.

Yet, that kiss we had shared last week, before I had attempted to sleep again, hadn’t felt like something between friends. That had been something more, something careful, something intimate. I had never kissed someone like that, and then called them a friend, and nothing more. I didn’t think I had ever kissed anyone with that level of emotion tied to the kiss itself, either.

I was in so fricking deep over my head.

Lydia forged on, completely unaware of my internal turmoil. Waving a hand through the air, she fixed her brown eyes on me, cocking her head to the side. “What, like we’d leave you presentless on your birthday? No way!”

“Presents aren’t everything, Lydia,” I sighed, offering her a small smile despite myself. She meant well, and I knew it.

“No,” she agreed, “but we put a lot of thought into these, so at least take two seconds to open them, will you?”

“Speaking of your birthday,” Gabriel chimed in, looking over at me from where he stood a bit off to the side, next to Sam, “I’ll be here for it, if you want to do anything.”

“That was my next piece of news. Thanks for spoiling it!” Lydia rolled her eyes at Gabriel, crossing her arms as she turned her body to face him more. I raised an eyebrow at the both of them, waiting for their staring match to end, and their explanation to come. Family week would have ended long before my birthday, so there had to be a pretty good reason as to why he’d still be in Angeles three weeks later.

It was Lydia who broke first, turning back to me as she pointed a finger at Gabriel. “He got that job he applied for, at the chemical testing facility here, in Angeles.”

“I won’t be returning to Knoxville with everyone else, once family week is over,” he confirmed with a nod. “I just need to finish furnishing my apartment, and then I am good to go.”

“Gabriel!” How was this only the first I was hearing of this? I knew he had applied for the job - he had done it while we were all still home in May - but nobody had bothered to tell me that he had heard back, or was even looking in to moving out to Angeles. “Congratulations!”

My oldest brother simply nodded, keeping his same neutral expression, despite the great news he had just told me about. Having Gabriel close by would be very nice indeed, if our schedules ever lined up in a way that would allow us to see each other. He was like a piece of home away from home, steady and constant no matter the conditions, like a boulder breaking up the rapids of a river.

Still, there were logistics to consider, even if we were close by, that had me shaking my head. “My birthday is on a Wednesday, though. You’ll be busy with your new job, and I’ll have classwork.”

He rolled his eyes at me, flashing a frown in my direction. “You’re not doing homework on your birthday. I’m sorry, but I won’t allow it.”

“And who put you in charge?” I raised an eyebrow back at him.

“Anyway,” Lydia interjected, now pointing her finger at Randall. I dropped Gabriel’s stare, and turned instead towards my younger brother, who was looking around the room, rocking back and forth on his heels. “Randall has a solo in his competition a capella group’s lineup this year, and is competing for music scholarships!”

“Randall!” I whirled around to look at my younger brother, holding my hands up in my excitement. “That’s amazing news! Congratulations!”

“He’s not actually going to pursue a career in music,” my mother chimed in from where she stood behind Lydia. Her eyes narrowed at Randall.

Lydia frowned for a moment, but then turned back to me, smiling once more. “Now, onto the biggest news - me!”

I rolled my eyes, watching still as my mother came to stand behind Lydia, placing one hand on each of Lydia’s shoulders. As she did that, Lydia thrust her hand out towards me, the ring on her finger catching and reflecting the light from the room. “I’m engaged!”

“To whom?” She hadn’t even had a boyfriend when I had left Carolina! I reached forward, grabbing her hand in mine. I was by no means an expert on wedding rings, but I was pretty sure this was a big one. Whoever he was, he must have a good deal of money, and a lot of charm to boot, to woo my sister in such a short period of time.

“Devon Judge,” was her answer.

My eyes went wide. “Devon Judge? The one who plays for the Braves? That Devon Judge?” A professional baseball player - a Two. The size of her ring was beginning to make sense to me.

I felt a hand on my shoulder, and turned my head around to see my father standing behind me, nodding. Holy crap. This was happening. This wasn’t an episode of Pranked! or an elaborate joke of Lydia’s. My sister was engaged, to a professional baseball player, after having known him for a maximum of three months.

“Congratulations,” I finally managed to stutter out, still staring at her hand like a fool.

There was another tap on my arm before I could say anything more. I flinched a little at first, startled, and looked up. Arin. I couldn’t contain the smile that spread across my face as I looked at him, taking in his own smile. “Arin! How are you?”

Around me, the chatter of the rest of my family members ceased, and they turned to face Arin, various degrees of curiosity evident on each of their faces. My father and older brothers kept their expressions pretty neutral, the most reactive being Gabriel, who simply raised his eyebrows. My sister, on the other hand, was now looking at Arin like she was at the supermarket, and he was an apple she was inspecting for bruises. Randall only glanced at Arin for a second before something else caught his eye and his attention wandered. My mother just smiled, ever the polite, well-mannered woman of the house.

Arin glanced at each of them in turn, still smiling as he did. “I’m doing well. I came over to check on you, and say hi.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” I replied, still smiling as I gestured towards my family members, where they stood around me. “Let me introduce you to my family.”

Here goes nothing. I pointed to each of my family members in turn as I spoke, making sure Arin knew who was who before moving on to the next person. “This is my father, and my mother.”

My mother offered him a polite smile, while my father kept his face expressionless, simply nodding at Arin before I moved on. So far, so good. It was still early, though. There was plenty of time for someone to say something stupid, or for an argument to break out.

“This is my sister, Lydia. She’s the oldest.”

Lydia had withdrawn her hand, folding both of her hands together in front of her, and fixing Arin with a smile that looked a little too falsely saccharine for my own comfort. I had known going into this that Lydia was going to be the hardest for Arin to win over. The two of us had always told each other everything, and Lydia was also incredibly stubborn when it came to holding grudges. Already, she’d made multiple jokes about Arin’s behavior on our roller skating date, and she hadn’t even been at the palace for a full twenty-four hours. I doubted she would say anything outright, though. She was the queen of passive aggressive comments and backhanded compliments, her sweet words often so false in situations like these that they gave a new meaning to killing someone with kindness.

I moved on, not letting myself linger on my worries. Lydia would behave, especially with our parents around. I wondered if her new fiance could handle her as well as we had all learned to. He must have been able to, or else they wouldn’t have gotten engaged, right? I felt a pang of sadness as the realization of just how much I had missed at home while I was here washed over me like a wave, drowning out the rest of my senses for a brief moment.

I had been enjoying myself in Angeles, though. There would always come a point in life in which I would have to move on, and live without my family at my side every waking second. It was for the better that it had come sooner, rather than later.

I gestured towards my two older brothers, who stood a little farther away from my sister, my parents, and I, still facing each other, their heads turned towards Arin. “Then there’s Gabriel, and Sam.” Both just nodded once, their expressions almost a carbon copy of my father’s. Gabriel might be older than Sam by almost two years, but he still stood a full inch shorter than Sam and my father. Something about his build, the way he carried himself, still made it clear to me that he was the older brother, though. I knew it wasn’t something I had imagined, either. Many people often confused Gabriel for being the oldest out of all five of us, despite Lydia actually holding that title.

“And this is my younger brother, Randall.” I pointed over to the other side of my mother, where Randall stood, his head turned upwards as he analyzed something on the ceiling with apparent interest, seemingly having blocked out everything else that was happening around him. At seventeen, he was already a good four inches taller than me, and based on the broadness of his shoulders, which he hadn’t grown into yet, he still had a good few more inches to go. At the sound of his name, he looked over towards me, his eyes wide with confusion. Upon noticing Arin, he offered the prince a small wave, before turning back to whatever had captivated his attention before.

“Don’t worry if you don’t get all of our names right away.” By my side, Lydia inclined her head, smiling at Arin as if she was a lion sizing up her prey. “There’s a lot of us.”

I cut her a glance, but kept my mouth shut. Was this an insult - a jab at him, for having taken a while to remember my name, or where I was from, or anything about me, for that matter? If it was, she was being unnecessarily ridiculous. It had been months since I’d complained to her about that. Holding a grudge for that long couldn’t be healthy, and yet, I knew she’d hold on to all of his mistakes for as long as it took for him to own up to and apologize for them in front of her. Even then, she wouldn’t forget about them. Being the oldest hadn’t left her with the sense of responsibility and duty that many oldest siblings seemed to display, but it had made her extremely protective and defensive of the rest of us. It was a blessing, and a curse.

Arin didn’t waver under Lydia’s gaze. Instead, he kept his smile in place, extending his hand towards my mother. “Holly, right?” As the words left his mouth, he glanced at me for a split second, the question flickering in his eyes.

I offered him a small but encouraging nod, along with a smile. Where he had learned my parents’ names, I wasn’t sure, but at that moment, I couldn’t care less. He was going to make a good impression on them, at this rate. That was a good sign.

Lydia’s expression flickered towards one of surprise, her eyebrows darting up and down her forehead, but it didn’t last. As quickly as her expression had changed, it had returned back to normal, her sickly sweet smile finding its home on her face once more. A quick look at the rest of my family revealed that Gabriel was frowning, more at Lydia than anyone else.

My mother, bless her, commanded Arin’s full attention at the moment, the smile she was giving him genuinely pleased. “Yes,” she answered as she shook his hand, the motion light and delicate on her behalf. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” I knew what her hands felt like without even having to touch them. Those were the hands that had held mine when I was young, cold yet soft to to the touch. Those were the fingertips, calloused from years of playing the violin, that had wiped away my tears when I was hurt. It almost seemed odd, now - the little details that stuck with me, despite being apart from her for so long.

I felt my father remove his hand from my shoulder, and I looked back up at him to see him wrap his arm around my mother’s shoulder, smiling down at her, his eyes alight with contentment, before he turned to look at Arin.

Arin inclined his head, turning his attention to my father and extending his hand to him. “Harald.”

I watched their interaction like a hawk, noting the way my father nodded once at Arin, and then shook his hand, his grip clearly firm. I couldn’t believe I was thinking it, but Arin almost looked kind of short, next to my father. Then again, who didn’t? I always felt like I was tall, in comparison to many of the people around me on a daily basis outside of my house, but I was still the shortest one in my family by a good two inches. Giants, they were.

I caught my mother as she attempted to subtly elbow my father in the side, as if that would prompt him to say something. My father must have taken the hint, because within seconds, he pulled his hand away, replying, “Pleasure. I got your phone call to my work phone, the other day.” His tone was almost curious, like he wasn’t entirely sure how Arin would respond to that fact.

“Ah, yes.” Arin cut me a glance, before turning his gaze back to my father. “Sorry that I missed you.”

I shook my head at Arin, frowning as I considered what my father had said. Had Lukas told him about the call, or had he been there the entire time? Why hadn’t he mentioned it to me, either? The morning after Arin had called him, I realized that I had three missed calls from my father, but he had never left a message, so I hadn’t really thought much of it, figuring that if it had been so important, he would have at least sent me a text, asking me to call him back. I set my gaze on my father then, raising an eyebrow. We were owed an explanation, just for his last comment to Arin, at the very least.

“All calls to the landline are recorded for quality assurance,” he explained, fixing me with a frown. “I thought you actually read your contract when you got your internship.”

Did anybody actually read those contracts? I blushed a bit, answering, “I guess I skimmed over that part.”

“You? Not being thorough about something?” Gabriel’s tone was amused as he took a few steps towards where my parents, Lydia, and I stood with Arin. He shook his head, grinning ever so slightly as he placed a hand on my shoulder. “Unheard of.”

My father turned his attention back to Arin, paying no mind to what Gabriel had said. “Sorry about Mr. Bernhardsen.”

It was almost odd, hearing him refer to Lukas by his last name. I knew that my father hadn’t been overly fond of him since day one, simply claiming that he felt something was off about Lukas, but he had never been outwardly rude, or even cold, towards Lukas, whenever he had been over at our house with me and June. He had always called Lukas by his name, or simply by, “young man.”

Looking back at it now, it was almost comical how right my father’s initial impression of Lukas had been, without him even realizing it. Hindsight was twenty-twenty, after all.

“If you’d like to file a complaint for the way he spoke to you, I could make sure it gets processed quickly,” my father offered, keeping his face carefully expressionless, not revealing how he felt one way or the other. I knew him well, though, and could hear the faint note or urging in his tone. He wanted Arin to do this.

Had he really disliked Lukas that much? He had said that he never liked him, after he had watched me push him off our front porch the night before I left for Angeles, but I supposed I had never really considered to what extent he felt that way. Why did he feel that way? My father was generally good at reading people, so perhaps it was just a vibe he had picked up from Lukas, but he normally didn’t develop feelings this strong off of something so small.

Arin was silent for a moment, looking as lost in thought as I was. Knowing what I had told him, what I was still trying to process myself, I couldn’t blame him. I swallowed, watching as he turned his head to look over at me, and murmured my name, the sound soft, but still loud enough that my family members could hear.

Where was this going? A quick glance at my family members revealed that their thoughts probably held the same question as mine, or something very similar, as they looked between Arin and my father, question marks written in all of their expressions. Gabriel’s grip on my shoulder tightened, and when I looked up at him, I noticed his jaw was clenched, his eyes focused only on Arin. What had set him off? Was it the way Arin had murmured my name? This was a mess, already, and we’d all barely said more than a sentence apiece.

I bit my lip, hesitating for a couple of seconds before swallowing my apprehension. “Yes, Arin?”

He stiffened, but his voice was soft - almost distracted - when he spoke. “It’s nothing.”

It didn’t take a genius to realize that it clearly wasn’t nothing. He probably just didn’t want to say anything in front of my family. I didn’t know why that made me feel as relieved as it did.

I reached out, my fingertips lightly grazing his arm, my voice barely louder than a whisper, so that only he would hear. “Tell me later?”

He didn’t reply, so I forged ahead, a little louder this time. “I only heard half the conversation, so it’s your call.” Shaking my head, I looked from my father back to Arin, narrowing my eyes at both of them in turn. “Did he say anything bad?”

“He was pretty rude - not that that’s a surprise,” my father admitted, shaking his head a bit. “I don’t think many people would miss his presence in the lab.”

He did have a point there. Lukas has never exactly been popular amongst our fellow interns, but then again, neither had I, really. The professors and other staff had always seemed to like him well enough, though. How many times had they joked that he and I should get together, and become a couple? I swallowed as I thought back on it, coming to the realization that their seemingly innocent comments must have fed into his own desires. The lab’s Christmas party, the kiss under the mistletoe, stood out in my memory. Had he asked them to help orchestrate that? My father had been away for a conference in Waverly that week, meaning he wouldn’t have been able to put a stop to such nonsense. It was no secret in the lab that he was fairly protective of me, but I didn’t think anybody knew of his dislike for Lukas. They had probably seen it as an innocent, romantic gesture.

My mother’s voice snapped me back into the present moment, dragging me out of my thoughts before they could consume me whole. I had never been so grateful to see her glaring at my father. “This is no place for conversations about work politics, Harald.”

“I’d think this is the perfect place to talk about the political,” Randall argued, looking at the ceiling as he spoke, smirking.

Arin paid them no attention, instead glancing down at my hand, and then back to my father. “If it's alright with you, I'd like to think on it.”

“Of course,” my father replied, his eyes steely as they flashed towards me, and then towards the hand I had on Arin’s arm. I waited with baited breath for him to say something about it, but he only nodded. “You know where to reach me.”

I shouldn’t have been surprised that it was my mother who made the first comment on my gesture. Her smile was polite, but there was something weary in her expression as she looked at my father. It vanished when she turned her attention to Arin, though, as if her curiosity about me placing my hand on his arm invigorated her. “It seems like you and Evalin have grown pretty close, over these months.” There was no malice in her tone, only genuine joy, as far as I could tell.

Arin had passed my mother’s test. That was the easiest one, though.

Lydia’s expression hadn’t changed throughout this entire conversation, and the smile that dripped with poisoned honey wasn’t going anywhere now. “Yes, it seems there’s been a big change of tune since your first date.”

“Lydia!” My mother frowned, and I couldn’t help but agree. Of course she would bring this up. Lydia would forgive, eventually, maybe, but she wouldn’t forget. Right now, she had yet to do either, on my behalf. I loved my sister dearly, with all my heart, and would be forever grateful to her for everything she had done for me, but it was times like this that I just wished she’d choose her own battles.

She looked over at our mother, her eyes wide, the picture of innocence. “What?”

I really hoped Devon Judge knew what he had gotten himself into.

A quick look upwards revealed that Gabriel was now frowning at Arin, as if he, too, was holding a grudge over this date that had happened months ago.

Was I going to make it through family week without losing my mind? I was skeptical. I shot Arin an apologetic smile, unsure of what to even say to smooth things over. Sorry for telling my sister about our horrible date, I was really upset at the time! I had a feeling that wouldn’t do anything.

His back stiffened again, but he still smiled at all of us. “Many things have changed over the last few months.”

“That’s good to hear,” Lydia replied, her voice lacking any ounce of genuineness.

“I’m sure it’s been a wild ride for you, as well,” my mother offered, looking at Arin with a polite smile.

Randall frowned, looking at her out of the corner of his eyes. “It’s been quiet without Evalin - the opposite of a wild ride.” I could only imagine that it had been quiet, for him. The two of us were the last kids at home, and much of our time had been spent with each other, while our parents worked. There had been quite a few nights that we had stayed awake together, talking about everything from our worries about the future, to topics as simple as which childhood cartoon had been more entertaining. To have the house entirely to himself, now, when our parents were at work couldn’t be as fun as it sounded, I was sure.

“I hope there’s been some moments you’ve actually enjoyed,” Gabriel stated, his grip on my shoulder loosening a bit, though he kept his hand where it was.

Arin cut me a glance. “I can only speak to my experience.”

“I think it’s definitely been full of good experiences,” I offered with a reassuring smile, unsure as to whether in doing so I was saving him from my family’s questions, or setting him up for more. It was hard to tell, with my family. With there being so many of us, with very different personalities, it was easy for us to pull the conversation in separate directions, rather than working as a unit to move it down one path.

My mother beamed as she looked over at me. “Well, I’m glad to hear it, but -” She turned to Arin, her smile a little more subdued now. I had seen her use that look before, when a student was arguing with her over whether or not they deserved points off on a test, and she didn’t want to upset them by just outright saying that they did. “We are quite interested in hearing what you have to say. We would like to get to know you better.”

“Yes!” Lydia echoed, nodding enthusiastically. “Of course we’ve heard the stories, but seldom do stories do reality justice.”  

My mother frowned at Lydia, and I was inclined to do the same. Before either of us could say anything, though, my father swept in, turning to Arin. “Evalin’s told us almost exclusively good things. The only negative word I heard from her was after your first date, but well -” he cast a nostalgic look at my mother, and I knew immediately what story he was about to launch into “- I wouldn’t worry about that. Holly called me a Three with a savior complex when I first asked her out, and we’ve been married for thirty-two years now.”

He really had brought up marriage, after meeting Arin for the first time. Was this some kind of test that my father was giving him, to see what his true intentions were? The possibility didn’t seem unlikely, to me. I had never thought I’d be envious of a chameleon, but I wouldn’t have minded having the ability to fade away into the background of this room, camouflaging myself from both my own family and from Arin until I could escape this conversation, right about then. Lydia might be ready to talk marriage after three months, but Arin and I? We weren’t even close to that point.

Once again, Arin stiffened, glancing over at me. “I guess only time will tell.” It was a non-answer, sure, but it was one of his better ones, if I was being honest. It wasn't entirely untrue, either. Only time would tell if he was going to send me home, or if I was here for the long haul.

I felt my brother’s grip on my shoulder tighten once more, and looked up to seem him grimace, before he met my gaze. After a second, he looked over at Arin, pausing again before offering, “You survived a conversation with Lukas without yelling, it sounds like. Kudos.” With that, he nodded, as if that fact alone was enough for him to accept Arin into our family.

I had suspected that Gabriel wasn’t too fond of Lukas, but we had moved past that part of the conversation. I narrowed my eyes, furrowing my brows as I kept my gaze on him. I had expected more resistance, more push-back, from him, if I was being honest, especially given the comments he had made to me before I had left for Angeles. He had been the one to warn me not to be, “the royal rebound,” after all. Why the sudden change of heart?

“So.” Lydia’s voice dragged my attention to her. She was frowning, looking at Gabriel out of the corner of her eyes as well, a hint of betrayal tinging her expression. She must have expected the same level of antipathy towards Arin from Gabriel that I had, then.

Despite that, she turned back to Arin, her smile genuinely curious now. “What else have you and Evalin talked about, or done? Someone -” she narrowed her eyes at me, pouring every ounce of accusation she could muster up into that one word “- has been a bit too busy to call often, lately.”

I narrowed my eyes right back at her, a snappy comment already on the tip of my tongue, but the look on my mother’s face stopped me. I knew that expression. It wasn’t quite a death glare, but it was as close as you could get to one while still maintaining a pleasant, polite air. It was better for me not to start an argument with Lydia here, anyway. We were a family, a unit. We put each other before all else, even if we did tease each other incessantly, and bicker amongst ourselves often.

“Books, mostly,” I answered, doing my best to soften my expression, despite the frustration I felt coursing through me. “He also took me to the ballet -” I shot Arin a teasing smile “- and lived to tell the tale.”

He looked between my sister and I. “We did go to the ballet, and I survived - which I actually have some experience with.” He paused again, and then added, “But I’d say Evalin had been fairly busy with school.”

With a roll of her eyes, Lydia turned her attention to me, placing her hands on her hips. “Of course you would come all the way here, and choose to focus on school. Would it kill you to take a break?”

I elected to ignore her comment, opting simply to elbow her in the side instead. Turning to Arin, I raised an eyebrow. “You have experience with the ballet? You never mentioned that.” He had seemed rather familiar with the layout of the theater, now that I thought about it, though. I supposed that would come from experience, rather than anything else.

“Ah, so you appreciate the arts!” My mother beamed at him, and I knew that she meant to take this as a golden opportunity to brag about all five of her children. “I made sure all of my children were involved in at least one music program when they were in high school!”

Arin turned to me first. “It never came up,” he said, his voice soft.

Never came up? We were literally at the ballet!

I kept my mouth shut, though, as he smiled at my mother and said, “I appreciate them, but not as much as I could. My sisters are more into the arts than I am.” He motioned to some of the paintings around the room, which my mother looked at as if she was seeing them for the first time.

“What are you into, then?” Randall furrowed his brows, looking first at the ground, and then at Arin.

I couldn’t keep from snickering at his comment - something I’d often wondered myself, when I had first been getting to know Arin - though upon seeing the glare my mother shot Randall’s way, I covered my mouth with my hand. Behind us, Sam sighed, and then walked over to Randall, ruffling his hair a bit when he reached him.

“I’m interested in reading, when I have time,” Arin answered, looking at Randall. He paused for a brief moment, and then added, “and running.”

“Oh,” Randall responded, looking over at me. “You’ve found a new running partner, then.”

I frowned. I hadn’t even known that Arin liked to run, and I definitely had never seen him out running in the mornings, when I usually ran. It was pretty empty in general around that time, which was kind of nice. We could all use a little reprieve from the hustle and bustle of palace life, sometimes.

“Randall, I doubt anyone is awake when she runs,” Lydia argued, as if she could read my thoughts just by looking at me. “Miss I’ll-Wake-Up-Before-The-Sun.”

“Yeah, I tend to run alone, these days. We have talked about reading, though,” I admitted, turning to look at my father. “I gave him the journals I published under Proctor.”

That seemed to pique my father’s interest. He hummed thoughtfully, turning his gaze to Arin once more, and raising an eyebrow. “Any thoughts on that?”

I had never seen Arin look so in need of a rescue. Either he had never read them, or he had tried to, but couldn’t understand what they were about. I really couldn’t blame him either way.

“Would you mind walking with me for a moment?” I asked, looking at him. I saw my father raise an eyebrow at me from where he stood, but he kept silent.

Arin shot me a confused look, but nodded nonetheless, motioning off to the side of the room. “Sure.”

I turned to smile at him as we walked, before casting a look over my shoulder at my family. They had formed a huddle of sorts, chatting with each other in a small circle, with little gesturing or animation. It was like watching a jury deliberate. They had to be talking about Arin, I was sure of that, but part of me would have killed to know what they were saying. At the same time, I was kind of glad I wasn’t close enough to hear, as if any negative opinions of theirs would taint the rest of my time here.

“Sorry,” I began, turning my attention back to Arin after watching Lydia and Gabriel leave my family’s huddle, walking off to the other side of the room. I pushed my curiosity about their actions out of my mind, wanting to focus solely on Arin. “I just needed to get away from them for a moment. They can’t be a lot.”

Arin simply shrugged. “I’ve experienced worse. They’re not that bad.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but before I could, I felt someone link their arm through mine.

“Good,” Lydia declared, looking over at Arin from where she now stood beside me. She must have snuck up behind us by taking the long way around the perimeter of the room, allowing her to avoid our direct attention. It had been a foolish mistake on my part for me to stop watching her. “Because as the oldest, and as Evalin’s only sister, I’m not done with you yet.”

“Lydia,” I sighed. I didn’t need a protector. I could handle Arin just fine on my own. I had been these past three months, with my family on the other side of the country. This display of hers was dramatic, unnecessary, and wholly in character, and I was beginning to get really fed up with it.

“Hush up, it's my job!” She elbowed me in the side, and then turned to her victim. I relented, giving her the silent permission to make her own bed, hoping that she was prepared to lay in it, too.  “Now, Arin, I’m not going to give you the whole, ‘if you hurt her, I’ll kill you,’ spiel, but -”

“Lydia, leave them alone.” Footsteps and a loud male voice sounded behind us, and I knew it could only be one person. I looked over my shoulder only to see Gabriel, his face a mix of apologetic and disappointed as he took in the scene before him.

Arin raised his eyebrows at my sister. “Then what are you going to give me?”

This time, I wasn’t going to give her the chance to respond. She’d done enough damage, as it was. “She’s going to give you nothing because she’s coming with me,” I grumbled, shaking my head and shooting one last look Arin’s way. “Sorry.”

Lydia rolled her eyes at me as I led her back towards where the rest of our family - minus Gabriel, now - stood. “He’s not good enough for you. You know that, right?”

“I could bring home a Nobel Peace Prize recipient, and you would still say that he wasn’t good enough for me,” I argued with a sigh. It wasn’t that I didn’t appreciate Lydia’s concern, but I was getting fed up with the way she was treating me as if I was a little kid who didn’t know what was good for her, or what she wanted.

“I’m just saying,” she began, coming to a stop in besides my mother. “You need someone who will help you lighten up, who will bring out that goofy side of you that we get to see when you’re with us. Arin -” she poked me in the side, looking over her shoulder at Arin, who was now deep in conversation with Gabriel “- is so uptight, and tense. Yes, you’re like two peas in a pod, but neither of you is going to help the other relax.”

I frowned, my eyebrows knitting together as I considered what she said. There had been moments with Arin, though, where we had joked around - like in the car, after the ballet. There was a more relaxed side to him, it just took some time for it to come out. How was she supposed to know that, though, without simply taking my word for it?

“Two things,” I decided, looking up from the ground to meet her gaze, “the first being that maybe, he was so uptight because you were about to threaten him.”

My mother’s eyes went wide, her hand coming to rest atop her chest. “Lydia Reidun!”

“The second thing, and you’re going to have to take my word for this, is that there is a more relaxed side to him. Even then, though, I wouldn’t be able to live the rest of my days with someone who was all play, and no work.” I shook my head. “I need someone who understands what it's like to devote yourself to your work, and above all else, I need someone who is going to make me happy.”

“Does he?” Sam asked, his face expressionless. “Make you happy, I mean.”

I nodded, looking over at where he and Gabriel stood once more. A part of my was tempted to walk over there and drag Gabriel away, but something held me back from doing that. He and Arin were around the same age - only a month apart, actually. Maybe they would become friends.

I turned back to Sam, nodding. “Yes.”

“Then he’s good in my book,” Randall decided with a shrug.

The rest of my family exchanged glances, shrugging intermittently as they did, as if they were all reaching the same conclusion telepathically. Only Lydia refused to join in, still glaring in Arin’s direction. “There’s more to him than he’s letting on, in more ways than one.” She shook her head, looking down at me. “Mark my words.”

--

Gabriel watched his sisters go, tempted to follow after them. He didn’t know the man before him - the prince - and he wasn’t fond of the power the monarchy held as a whole, which only made him more uncomfortable as he forced himself to stay put. There was a long list of things he should have done differently these past few months. There was an even longer list of things he would have liked to change about the past year. Having this conversation, as rough as he predicted it would be, was only the beginning to making things better for the future.

“Sorry about that,” he sighed, not looking at the prince as he spoke. “Lydia is just a little protective. We all are.”

He cleared his throat, stalling for time as he figured out how to best phrase his next words. It felt like he was talking to someone much younger than him, even though he himself was only about a month older than the prince. It likely had something to do with the fact that it was his younger sister that the prince was dating, for lack of a better word. Even then, though, Evalin was only two years and nine months younger than he was. It wasn’t as if she was a child.

Mistake Number One: not trying harder to persuade Evalin not to apply for the Selection.

“Evalin seems to trust you a lot, and she’s a good judge of character, so I don’t want to think you’d do anything, but…” he trailed off, grimacing at his own inability to effectively voice his thoughts without potentially offending the prince. He was his father’s son, through and through, his grandparents often reminded him. He didn’t know how to mince his words, and his temper had run hot for all his life so far. His father must have learned to hide it better than Gabriel had, though, because Gabriel was of the conclusion that his father’s temper ran as cold as ice. That didn’t mean that either of them was better than the other. They both still had tempers.

Mistake Number Two: letting Evalin go to that fraternity’s Halloween party last fall.

“You’ve spoken to Lukas. He’s…” Gabriel trailed off again, not for lack of trying. He had a feeling he was going to have to add this conversation to his list of mistakes sooner rather than later. “He did something bad, with Ev, last fall, and I don’t even think she remembers it, but Lydia, our father, and I were the ones who saw her after, and just seeing her like that…”

Their entire family had been home that weekend, for one of Randall’s concerts. His group had been competing for the regional title that weekend. Gabriel couldn’t even remember whether they had won or lost. All he remembered from that weekend was Evalin, sobbing, almost incoherent as he had put his arm under her shoulders, practically carrying her up the stairs. He knew objectively she wasn’t tiny, but in that moment, she had felt like the smallest child in his arms.

Mistake Number Three: Not being there for any of his siblings when they needed him.

He shook his head. “I think it broke all of us, a little bit. I guess what I’m trying to say is, we never want to see her like that again.” Another shake of his head, and then he took a step back.

Lydia had been the only one really capable of calming Evalin down long enough for her to fall asleep that night. Then Lydia had come downstairs, and unraveled in front of him and their father. Gabriel hadn’t been able to sew the pieces back together. Lydia had done that herself.

The prince was silent, his gaze locked in on Evalin, where she stood with the rest of Gabriel’s family, shaking her head at something one of them had just said.

“Evalin remembers,” the prince said, finally. “She told me what happened.”

Mistake Number Four: Never talking about that night, again. Until now.

He blew out a breath, running his hand through his hair. He watched his younger sister throw her head back in laughter, the look so full of freedom, of light, as if she didn't have a care in the world. She jumped up, reaching for something that Sam was now holding over his head. What it was, Gabriel couldn’t tell. He was too focused on the fact that Evalin, Lydia, all of them - they all looked as if they had never known any darkness or suffering.

She remembers.

“Shit,” he sighed out, not knowing what else to say. “Okay. We…The next day, she told her friend June - who had driven her home, that night - that she didn’t remember anything from that night, so we assumed…” He trailed off, shaking his head. That was where they had gone wrong. They had made assumptions, instead of gathering all of the possible evidence and data, and then drawing a conclusion.

Mistake Number Five: doubting his younger sister’s sense of judgement, despite knowing how good it generally was.

“Thanks for letting me know. The fact that she opened up to you like that…” Evalin told him, but not us. Why? “She trusts you a lot. More than I thought she did.”

It hurt him to admit. That his own sister wouldn’t come to him with her troubles, and instead had confided in someone she had only recently met, stung, but he could understand why that was. He wasn’t a warm person. He didn’t offer solutions. He was terrible at giving advice, and was quicker to anger than he was to hug.

He was beginning to see the prince - Arin - in a new light.

Arin swallowed, his gaze still locked on Evalin. It was clear to Gabriel that Arin cared about his sister quite a bit, though whether or not he thought of her as a friend or something more, Gabriel was unsure. He didn’t really care to ask, either. That wasn’t his business.

“I didn’t realize,” was all Arin said by way of reply.

Gabriel raised his eyebrows, looking at Arin as he spoke for the first time since they had started this conversation. “Did you think she would tell you something like that if she didn’t trust you?”

“I -” Arin paused. “I just didn’t know that she hadn’t told anyone else.”

Oh.

“So I guess I realize a bit more, now.”

Mistake Number Six: hiding his knowledge of that night from his sister.

Gabriel hesitated for a moment, almost not wanting to admit what he knew had to come next. “I’m not sure she knows that any of us know. She was in pretty bad shape, and it’s not exactly something you can bring up in conversation easily.” How did you even bring up a repressed memory to your little sister - the one who you were supposed to protect? Did you mention it around the dinner table? Did you sit her down after she had excitedly told you about her new project, or the A she had just gotten on one of her assignments? Did you wait until it was late at night and you were both still awake, reminiscing about childhood memories?

He exhaled through his nose, pressing his lips in a line and shifting his gaze back to the rest of his family. None of them had been able to answer that question. He, Lydia, and their father had lived with Evalin’s secret, and none of the others had been any the wiser. “I don’t know how our father manages to see him at work every day without doing anything.”

Mistake Number Seven: lying - often.

He knew how his father managed. His temper ran cold, icy, always latent. It made him a patient man.

Arin frowned, his gaze shifting to Gabriel’s father now. “He knows?”

Hadn’t they already been over this? Arin’s memory must not be stellar.

“Yes,” Gabriel answered, matching Arin’s frown with one of his own. “I did say that it was me, him, and Lydia who saw Evalin after, didn’t I?”

He shook his head, looking back at his family, at his father, who stood there, ever calm, ever quiet. Gabriel wasn't the only one guilty of lying, whether it was outright, or by omission.

“I think he almost can’t bear to tell her - like he can’t handle the thought of her being upset.” Evalin had been their father’s baby since the day she had been born. Their father loved all of his children, yes, but there had always been a little extra spark in his eyes when he looked at Evalin. It was the same spark their mother reserved for Lydia, and their grandfather for Sam. Gabriel and Lydia had always assumed that Evalin would remain the youngest, for that reason. Randall had been a surprise, though definitely not an unwelcome one. “It’s hard to be certain, though. He’s a very private man.”

Mistake Number Eight: not dealing with Lukas himself.

Arin pursed his lips. “And why is Lukas still around?”

It was a valid question, though it still left Gabriel frowning. “Let’s say, hypothetically, we filed a report. The victim tells her story when she’s highly intoxicated, and then doesn’t remember anything about it the next morning, and still actively wants to be friends with the alleged perpetrator. She’s not going to make a statement against him. I’m no lawyer, but a case like that doesn’t exactly sound like it’s going to hold up.”

There were other options, though, and he knew it. Gabriel sighed. “Alternatively, let’s say my father and I pursued a less legal route, and dealt with Lukas ourself. Where does that leave us? Jobless? Imprisoned? Plus, Evalin still liked Lukas as a friend, so she would be upset.”

A lot of it did come down to Evalin still keeping in contact with Lukas, as if nothing had happened. Despite being a sweet girl, she had never had many friends. She had always been a little peculiar. That was likely why. Still, that fact alone had left him hesitant to rip away the veil of friendship, to pull the rug right out from underneath her.

“In another scenario, let’s say we tried to tell her what she told us. Ev is stupidly stubborn, as I’m sure you’ve noticed, and her mind was clearly repressing the memory for a reason. Either telling her breaks her, or she doesn’t believe us.”

Mistake Number Nine: not doing anything.

Gabriel pursed his lips, looking at Arin once more. “Believe me, I may be the world’s shittiest older brother, but I’ve given this issue a lot of thought.”

“But she already knows,” Arin argued, his frown deepening with each word that left his mouth, “and how can you know what she wants if you never talk to her about it?”

Mistake Number Ten: knowing he was in the wrong, but not allowing anybody but himself to tell him that.

He raised his eyebrows at the prince. “This is the first time I’m hearing that she actually remembers anything from that night. None of us knew that she remembered. You asked why Lukas was still around. That’s why. I think the fact that she continued their friendship after that night is proof enough that she didn’t remember until recently.”

The prince just nodded. “Okay.”

It wasn’t. Gabriel didn’t have to be a mind reader to know that Arin knew that, too, but he was tired of arguing. He had done his job, and said his bit. He could make peace with that, whether or not Arin agreed with him. He had never been there for the prince. He was only there for the girl now walking their way, a small grin on her face. He was only there for his sister.

--

I was beginning to think that I had left Arin and Gabriel alone for just a little too long, judging by the frowns on both of their faces. It was almost comical watching them talk, though, even if I hated to admit it. The moment one made a facial expression, the other mirrored it, going back and forth for as long as I dared to keep sneaking glances at them.

“Hold on,” I whispered to my father, inclining my head towards the pair chatting by the wall, “let me go retrieve Gabriel.”

It didn’t take me long to make my way to them, grinning as I looked at their identical frowns. They were more similar than I had ever dared to consider, I realized, now that I actually allowed myself to ponder the thought.

I raised an eyebrow at Gabriel as I got closer. “Everything okay over here? It looked like you were having a pretty intense conversation.”

It took everything in me not to laugh at the tight smile Arin gave me as he nodded. “Your brother and I were just swapping opinions.”

Oh, how I would have killed to be a fly on the wall for that conversation.

I narrowed my eyes at the pair, looking from Arin to Gabriel, taking note of the details as I did. Arin’s answer was a bit vague, as per usual, his smile one of the most uncomfortable I’d seen from him in a while. Gabriel had on his pensive face, from what I could tell, his lips pressed in a thin line, and his eyes somewhere far away.

“Well,” I began, looking at Arin as I motioned to my brother by inclining my head in his direction. “Lord only knows he’s got a lot of them.”

There was no shift in my brother’s expression as he nodded. “Guilty as charged.” He began walking past me then, patting me on the shoulder along the way. With one last glance back at Arin, he nodded, and concluded, “Nice talking to you.”

I waited until I was sure that he had rejoined my family before turning to Arin, channeling all my self control into keeping myself from laughing at his facial expression.

“Are you enjoying your family being here?”

I nodded, placing my hand on his arm. “Yes, but that look on your face says you might not feel the same.” I shook my head, casting a quick look in my family’s direction, before flashing Arin an amused smile again.

When I looked back, his gaze was focused only on my hand. “I’m fine.”

I raised an eyebrow at him, grinning a little. “This looking-at-my-hand-whenever-I-touch-you thing is becoming a trend - and just when you’d stopped staring at me.” I shook my head, my curiosity getting the better of me. One of these days, I was going to have to formulate a list of all of the things about him that still mystified me, and go through it one by one.

On second thought, maybe that’s a bit too much.

He raised his eyebrows at me. “I hadn't noticed.”

I raised an eyebrow right back at him, the perfect pun popping into my head at that moment. “I guess you could say you’re a little out of touch.”

My joke landed on deaf ears, I realized, as his look turned to one of confusion. “Am I?”

Sometimes when talking to him, I couldn’t help but wonder how it was possible for someone to be so clueless. Laughing a little, I explained, “You seem not to notice a lot of things.”

In the silence that followed, it hit me, that my words might have been a little harsh. He had had the same reaction to my touch the night before, after I had told him about Lukas. Was he uncomfortable with having physical contact with me, now? No, that was absurd. We had kissed later that very same night, for crying out loud!

Still, it was only right that I ask. I hesitated for another second, then decided to go for it, keeping my voice as quiet as I could. “Does me touching your arm or hand make you uncomfortable? Is that it? You were so kind and understanding the other night, and I don’t want to mess this up either.”

“It's fine,” he reassured me, giving me a smile. “I promise.”

I promise. I didn’t take the weight of those words lightly.

I offered him a smile in return. “It was refreshing to talk as openly as we did then. Though, I -” I pressed my lips together “- I have questions, but now’s probably not the time or place.” A pause, and another smile, and then, “But thank you, for being a little more open with me, that night, and for handling my family.” I inclined my head towards them, laughing lightly for a second.

“No problem. It's what I do.” He followed my gaze towards my family, nodding once before adding, “and we can talk later.”

“I'd like that,” I admitted, smiling and nodding once, before inclining my head towards my family again, laughing a bit. “I should probably get back to them. You know, despite Lydia's thinly veiled threats, this is the most open I've ever seen them be towards anyone any of us have introduced them to.” There weren’t many precedents, but that didn’t make the statement any less true, or the sentiment any less real.

The news seemed to cheer him up a bit, as a small smile, genuine this time, flickered across his face. “Well, that's a good sign. I'm glad I made at least somewhat of a good impression.”

“You made a very good impression, I think. Not an easy feat, with that lot.” I chuckled. My family was big, and opinionated, and filled with strong personalities, but they were good people, truly. I could only hope Arin saw that too.

He chuckled a bit, as well. “You should see my family at Christmas.”

“That’s always the biggest holiday in our house,” came my immediate reply, accompanied with a smile as I thought about Christmases past. “It’s basically a month long affair - my grandparents always come over, and make enough Swendish Christmas cookies to feed an army, and Gabriel’s birthday is the day after Christmas, so that always becomes a celebration. My mother’s parents always used to come too, before…” I trailed off, wanting to stop at the happy memories. There was no need to dwell on the negative today. It was a good day. We were surrounded by good people.

“Some people are starting to stare I think,” he murmured, chuckling as he glanced around the room.

“Oh,” I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks, even as I took a few steps back, folding my hands in front of me. “Sorry, I hadn’t noticed. I’d love to hear what your Christmases were like, at some point, though.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he assured me, nodding towards my family. “You should go be with them.”

I hated the way he phrased that. He wasn’t going anywhere, of course not. This was his home. Me, on the other hand - well, he could force me out anytime he wanted to, maybe even after this week.

I didn’t let myself linger too long on the thought, nodding instead, and beginning to walk towards my family. “I’ll see you around, then.”

I hope.

[dandelionseedoutlier]

The hidden value of personal relationships for supporting educational change

Guest Author: Amy Cassata

Photo by: Jerry Cargill

It’s been nearly two months since our nation was first directed to work from home and exercise social distancing to decrease the spread of Covid-19.  Yet, while we have put physical distance between each another, the way we relate on a personal level is transforming. Ironically, in times of physical separation, the moment is ripe for nurturing one factor that research has shown drives change – personal relationships.

A recent Canadian public opinion survey suggests that many colleagues are indeed feeling closer to one another: 52% of respondents reported improved relationships with coworkers during the Covid-19 pandemic. Increased social interaction is also happening outside the workplace. Over the past month, numerous stories have documented rekindled connections among distant friends, extended family reunions, and strengthened connections between neighbors taking place now because people have the time and crave human connection.

We know from research that trusted human relationships provide tangible value to educational change efforts, particularly when it comes to diffusing new practices and enhancing learning and improvement [1, 2, 3]. For teachers, in particular, trusted relationships with colleagues can:

facilitate the development shared goals and understandings;

promote a sense of safety with experimentation without judgment;

provide opportunities for learning through exchange of information and expertise;

increase the likelihood that innovations will be spread beyond single classrooms; and

motivate individual action, even when it’s difficult.

The development and maintenance of close personal relationships is one of three basic psychological needs. Research has shown that environments that foster belongingness and connection with others can support individual engagement in and perceived value of activities, and in turn, promote sustained motivation in them [4]. Social encouragement makes trying new things psychologically safe, desirable to attempt, and achievable - especially if everyone is explicitly learning together and reaching for a common goal  [5, 6].

When it comes to change efforts, relationship factors are just as important as individual teacher characteristics and more technical aspects of reform. As educators are being asked to radically change how they plan, teach, assess, and work together in response to the Covid-19 pandemic, strong social supports are important now more than ever. However, with all their positive benefits, these collaborative behaviors aren’t typically measured or monitored, let alone rewarded, in educational settings [7].

Many working in education research may wonder where we might focus our energies as the nature of our work shifts. How can we best meet the needs of educators as they take extraordinary steps to ensure students receive continuity in academic and socio-emotional support? Our field may adjust in part by connecting on a personal level with our education partners and collaborators and encouraging our partners to do the same.  As time goes on, we might explore ways to work together to systematically study relationship changes so that we can better understand and capture their effects on teaching, learning, and instructional change.

Trusted relationships among colleagues don’t happen overnight – they require time, intentional effort, and ongoing interactions [8]. With “normal life” months away, the conditions are optimal to cultivate such interactions. While the future is uncertain, this historic period of social distancing will eventually be part of the past. When that time comes, and we inevitably slip back into our busy routines, we should not let ourselves forget the value of human connection to furthering our goal of educational improvement. Maybe, if we’re lucky, we will even see some unintended positive consequences from this very unusual social experiment.

In what ways have your professional and personal relationships changed during the Covid-19 pandemic?  Share your story with us at dandelionseedoutlier@gmail.com.

Citations:

[1] Spillane, J.P. & Thompson, C.L. (1997). Reconstructing conceptions of local capacity: The local education agency’s capacity for ambitious instructional reform. Educational Evaluation and Policy Analysis, 19(2), 185-203. [2] Seashore Louis, K. & Lee, M. (2016). Teachers’ capacity for organizational learning: the effects of school culture and context. School effectiveness and school improvement, 27(4), 534-556. [3] Bryk, A. S., Sebring, P. B., Allensworth, E., Easton, J. Q., & Luppescu, S. (2010). Organizing schools for improvement: Lessons from Chicago. Chicago, IL: University of Chicago Press. [4] Ryan, R.M. & Deci, E.L. (2000). Self-determination theory and the facilitation of intrinsic motivation, social development, and well-being. American Psychologist, 55(1), 68-78. [5] Hargreaves, A. & Fullan, M. (2012). Professional capital: Transforming teaching in every school. New York: Teachers College Press. [6] Bandura, A. (1986). Social foundation of thought and action. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice- Hall. [7] Quintero, E. (2016). The hidden power of our social worlds. In Daly et al. (Eds.), The social side of education reform (pp. iv-v). Albert Shanker Institute. [8] Leana, C.R. & Pil, F.K. (2016). A new focus on social capital in school reform efforts. In Daly et al. (Eds.), The social side of education reform (pp. 4-6). Albert Shanker Institute.

[timetrickster]

Aloha Oe X Edith Nox Crossover Episode 8: Ice + Fire = Emotions

So, this episode has music, I recommend you play the music.

@cometworks < author of her novel.

Tag: @coloursintheblur , @thelysstener

And here we go!

FADE IN:

INT. NEYDOLYA’S NEW HIDDEN LAIR.

The aftermath of the RAVEN MONSTER had passed. VODNIK, slimy and sneaky frogman and right hand to the disgraced Fate NEYDOLYA. He returns to his mistress’s side and gives full reports.

NEYDOLYA

Vodnik… your reports.

VODNIK

Mistress Neydolya, I’ve come to report that the ritual by the Necromancers brought him back.

NEYDOLYA

A successful mission, presumed. Do you have what is required of the spell?

VODNIK

Yes, mistress. (He presents her with a book with the ritual circle drawn and list of ingredients next to it.)

She grabs the book and looks over it.

NEYDOLYA

Good. The Empath Witch?

VODNIK

The news of the Black Beast’s return had sent her into a state of rage. Her mind fractured separating her core emotions.

FLASHBACK: VODNIK had followed JUSTIN & VIOLET holding a knocked out EDITH.

NEYDOLYA

Interesting. Empath Magic has that capability. Search the archives, there may be an item that has a similar ability. What shall we do with the Princess?

VODNIK

A demon of her own design, her ice, her fire, and her fear.

CUT TO:

INT. JUSTIN’S PRIVATE QUARTERS. MID-MORNING

It was mid-morning, the sun was shining, and JUSTIN was in his private quarters. He conversed with ENOCH.

JUSTIN

Enoch, open Diary Recording. Nox Universe. 582. New entry.

ENOCH

Diary Entry Number 8. Recording begins.

JUSTIN

It’s been a couple of weeks now in this universe. I made amazing new friends and a world full of magic and possibly beyond. Recently fought a raven mutant monster. Noemi and Argento have soul summoned him by accident… glad he found some new development in himself. I wonder what will happen this day. (He falls silent.) Stop recording.

VIOLET comes into his private quarters slowly.

VIOLET

Justin? I need to talk.

JUSTIN

Come on in.

They both sit down together.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

What’s up?

VIOLET

There’s this person… that I… I… I…

JUSTIN

Like a lot?

VIOLET already feeling awkward enough just shuts her mouth up. Shakes her head up and down answering his question. JUSTIN smirks with excitement. VIOLET felt a little awkward due to the fact she doesn’t open up to many people and with someone that’s an alien. She felt like the only person she could talk too was him.

JUSTIN

Who? Boy? Or Girl? (He looked at her as if he was inspecting clues written on her face ) Girl? Isn’t it?

VIOLET nods again.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

Someone new? Someone you’re close to?

VIOLET

Someone I’m close to.

JUSTIN

Oh, lovely. Uh, military officer?

VIOLET

She’s not in the military.

JUSTIN

Oh, okay, uh. So personal then?

VIOLET was silent but was looking at a plant in the corner of the room. JUSTIN realizing who she likes very much his jaw drops.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

Noooooo… No. No. Really?!

Drawn back from his words, VIOLET was scared.

VIOLET

WHAT?! What?!

JUSTIN

Is it… is it Edith?

There was a slight smile on his face, VIOLET became rather shy and had a pinkish red tone flushing her cheeks. The feeling of embarrassment and feelings of lov- lov- lo- liking someone a lot. Her face squished from liking someone a lot and embarrassment she tries to hide her face with both hands. A smile was finally formed on JUSTIN’S face as he goes to sit next to her and comfort her.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

Hey, no, no. It’s okay.

He was rather caring and supportive.

Dude, you like Edith?

VIOLET

Yeah…

JUSTIN

V! That’s great! It’s amazing!

VIOLET

Thanks…

JUSTIN

Look I know you’re nervous and like I told Noemi. I was so afraid and nervous too. I fell in love with Hoku since I attended high school on Earth. I… uh… it was her eyes. Those shining brown eyes that reminded me of the stars.

VIOLET

That sounds… sweet of you for Hoku. But I can’t express it to her, I’m afraid…

JUSTIN

Again I know how you feel. Even my daughter felt exactly the same way when she met her boyfriend.  

VIOLET

Wait you have a daughter?

JUSTIN

Adopted. But she’s still my little girl. Despite being a similar age to her.

VIOLET

She’s a hundred too?

JUSTIN

No, just a regular Panguan girl. She’s only 17. But anyways… let me help you out.

CUT TO

INT. LAPIS FORREST. MID-MORNING

Both VIOLET & EDITH with a picnic basket in hand are walking toward the Lapis Forrest. VIOLET felt the feelings of nervousness. Something she was unable to feel before due to the fact she is trained to face things beyond terrifying than this. As well as being both Princess and Commander, to an entire kingdom. But this… this was nothing compared to fighting other witches and wizards and facing an entire kingdom.

VIOLET has a quick flashback:

FLASHBACK:

JUSTIN

Ok! What does Edith like?

VIOLET

Uh… gardening, libraries, tea, people, puzzles, questions…

JUSTIN

I meant… on a date but that’s good. Where does she like to spend her time?

VIOLET

The Lapis Forrest.

JUSTIN

Maybe a picnic?

VIOLET

She loves picnics.

JUSTIN

Then great! Start off with a picnic!

CUT TO:

INT. EDITH’S FAVORITE SPOT. MID-MORNING

VIOLET distracted trying to remember what to do, EDITH had already set up the picnic set.

EDITH

Violet? Are you okay?

VIOLET was caught zoning out. EDITH motions her to sit on the blanket.

VIOLET

What? Oh, sorry a bit distracted. (She sits)

EDITH

You okay?

VIOLET

I’m fine. How was your day?

EDITH

I don’t know really, the day has just begun but I’m pretty much happy that you asked me to go on a picnic. Want to go the Bazaar later?

VIOLET

I’d love that.

VIOLET & EDITH are enjoying their picnic, filled with their favorite foods and drinks.

EDITH

Can you really believe it?

VIOLET

Believe what?

EDITH

Justin… him being an alien and all that. Space. There’s really more out there in the universe.

VIOLET recalls to a flashback of EDITH on Gaia. VIOLET recalls a memory of EDITH and LEANA both holding hands of LEANA. Being two big sisters to her, they had watched the stars while a night on the town.

VIOLET

Yeah… I couldn’t believe it either.

EDITH

You were quite harsh with him too.

VIOLET

I was still learning how to trust him. Plus a boy spouting about aliens and space and different universes isn’t exactly normal for us.

EDITH

True… but he turned out to be a good person.

VIOLET

He is a good man… he brought new experiences for us.

EDITH

Time travel! Universe travel! He took you to see Clementine…

VIOLET

I know… despite what happened… I know he was trying to be kind…

EDITH gets closer to her to comfort her. VIOLET'S inner thoughts made her blush.

EDITH

Sorry…

VIOLET

NO! Don’t be. I just miss her, ya know? Wishing I had more time and all but I know she’s in a better place.

EDITH

That’s good… and she’s probably watching over you right now.

VIOLET looks at her scars and smiles.

VIOLET

I know.

The feeling of happiness surrounded their soon to be a fun-filled day.

CUT TO:

INT. LAPIS BAZAAR. AFTERNOON

The Lapis Forrest was this unique beauty within itself. It was home to a species of tree that produces blue buds when flowering. Just like the color of lapis lazuli. The leaves are a very deep green. There were huge rocks of Lapis Lazuli everywhere as well.

In the Bazaar, there was filled with magical creatures here and there and humans as well. A peaceful coexistence, everyone acknowledges VIOLET as their princess with greetings and bowing.

EDITH

Famous as always.

VIOLET

Well… I am a princess. (She smiles with pride)

EDITH laughs and smiles, she sees something catching her eye and sees gemstones which make her overall happy. She eyes a simple and basic quartz crystal on the vendor’s table.

EDITH

QUARTZ! (A smile was glued on her face)

She holds it and sees it change color, to Mellow.

VENDOR

Are you an Empath, if I may ask?

EDITH

I am!

VENDOR

Then that is the perfect gemstone for you. That quartz is enchanted as a sort of aura looker. You can see their emotions.

The gemstone was imperfect but EDITH loved it anyway. She looks through the clearness and saw the VENDOR’S aura showing mellow.

EDITH

Cool!

VENDOR

That will be a 15 Units.

EDITH checks her wallet but was short on cash.

EDITH

Aw man… I don’t have enough units.

VIOLET sees her sad face and steps in, holding 15 units. Their coin currency were metal thin rectangles.

There were huge rocks of Lapis Lazuli everywhere as well.

VIOLET

Fifteen Units, here ya go.

The VENDOR shocked by her presence, he bows.

VENDOR

Princess Violet!

VIOLET

Hello, my lovely subject.

VENDOR

You have graced me with your presence, your highness. Please take the quartz in honor of you my princess.

She places the units on the table.

VIOLET

No. You are a hardworking man. You deserve to be paid for what you do. Please.

He bows and EDITH takes the gemstone and she holds it in both hands. Scrutinizing it and holding to her eye and looking through it. She looks at VIOLET and sees her current aura, it was all pink and with EDITH’S magic it amplified it. Seeing the emotion of love. The excitable EDITH curious as always smiles after the discovery.

EDITH

V? (She steps closer to her) You like someone? (She whispered)

Surprised and scared by the question, VIOLET had believed EDITH knew her feelings for her.

VIOLET

How did you know?

She was scared and embarrassed that her true feelings were revealed.

EDITH

Is it a prince?!

Showing some relief, she answers.

VIOLET

No. It’s not a prince.

EDITH

Knowing you no prince can win your heart. A Military man?

VIOLET

Uh… no.

EDITH

Oh my… a normal boy?

VIOLET nods and shows embarrassment.

EDITH (cont’d)

A NORMAL BOY! A princess and a simple boy. That reminds me of a fairy tale momma read to me once. TELL ME! TELL ME!

VIOLET

We met… uh… we met during a trip to a Blacksmith. Father was making a request for a blade to be made once I reached eighteen. He was the son of the blacksmith… and I thought he was handsome.

EDITH

That’s so adorable! YOU SHOULD MEET HIM AGAIN!

VIOLET

I don’t think I can.

EDITH

Don’t deny your feelings V… You’ll never know how he truly feels.

VIOLET

Edith… you know me… I’m not raised by my emotions… everything I am I was just… I don’t know! (She became emotional) I’m a Princess and a military commander… I trained myself to be serious and…

EDITH

You wear a heart of steel.

VIOLET

Yeah…

EDITH

But knowing you… determined as always. You’ll find a way to show that handsome… handsome boy love you.

VIOLET

Yeah…

CUT TO:

INT. JUSTIN’S PRIVATE QUARTERS

JUSTIN doing research as he has a plate of food and soda next to a fancy glass cup. VIOLET rushes in and was extremely worried. She hugs JUSTIN to which he responds to treat her like a big baby.

JUSTIN

Hey! How was the picnic? Was it bad?

VIOLET

Not it was good…

She sounded like a child as she said her sentences like a child.

JUSTIN

Then why are you upset?

VIOLET

Because… she… almost found out I liked her… (She pouts)

JUSTIN

Did she?

VIOLET

No… she saw my aura with this gemstone that amplified her magic. It was pink… I was in love.

JUSTIN smiles sits her down on a chair.

JUSTIN

That’s good! Did you tell her?

VIOLET

No… I made up someone…

JUSTIN rubs his face with his right hand.

JUSTIN

Are there any further plans?

VIOLET

I don’t know…

JUSTIN

I think you should tell her.

VIOLET jumps out of her seat grabbing JUSTIN by his shirt.

VIOLET

No! I can’t Justin!

JUSTIN

But why?

VIOLET

Because I can’t do it! I don’t think I can do it! (She starts to cry)

Tears were falling down her face.

I am just a princess… and a soldier… and I’m complicated! Edith wants normal! And simple! And everything else normal! I’M NOT NORMAL! I AM EVERYTHING COMPLICATED!

She cries in JUSTIN’S shoulder to hide her face. He caressed her back to make her feel better.

How can someone so beautiful have so much power over my heart?

JUSTIN

It’s called love… it’s the most complex feeling in the world and yet it makes you feel so happy. And I can’t believe you said that about her.

VIOLET

Said what?

JUSTIN

You called her beautiful.

Despite the tears, that little sly comment made her smile.

VIOLET

She really is… how can someone like that ever love someone so complicated as me?

JUSTIN

Love suffers long and is kind.

VIOLET

Where’s that from?

JUSTIN

A thing called the Bible. It’s an Earth thing.

VIOLET laughs.

VIOLET

What am I gonna do?

JUSTIN

You get her attention. How’s a dinner in the Lapis Forrest? Any good spots?

VIOLET

Um… there’s this spot that would be nice for a dinner date. It’s by a stream and it’s a huge space.

JUSTIN

Sounds perfect. Enoch, do you still have the Digital Construction Box?

ENOCH

Of course, Captain.

ENOCH makes the item appear on the table through digital transport. JUSTIN grabs the box and throws it in the air catching it.

JUSTIN

You ready?

VIOLET

I guess…

JUSTIN

No. (He kneels before her) Violet Choi. Look at me.

She does so and looks at him in the eyes. Her face showing a somewhat of wallowing sadness and shame. JUSTIN’S face held this slight smile but didn’t give off the sense of happiness. He held much of his breathe in as it was too raspy. His heart had opened to Violet as he spoke about the one girl that he honestly and truly loved.

JUSTIN

Again… I know what this feels like. You are beyond… terrified. Despite being something so impossible. That somebody so normal as Edith…  can make all the difference in our lives so much better. I was scared, afraid that I would mess up… but I told her because I couldn’t stand the longing and the aching pain of my heart. Now, she loves me… somebody I believed I wasn’t worthy enough for… somebody who always had their heart open just for me.

His heart was worn as if it were a crown and laid out for Violet to see. What he had spoken was all too true for her as well, as is with everyone else who experiences love, I guess in some cases.  

JUSTIN (cont’d)

So please don’t say, “I guess” say “I’m ready.” because deep down you love her… and somewhere along the way, you won’t know if she feels the same way.

VIOLEt had raindrop type of tears, she still held a serious face but had that sadness attached to it.

VIOLET

I want to tell her so bad… but I can’t. My heart feels locked… and it stops me from telling how I truly feel.

JUSTIN

I think I can help with that.

JUSTIN breathes in and puts both hands together, he breathes out and his eyes glow orange. Using his aura manipulation to unlock his Empath powers. He places his right index and middle finger on VIOLET’S forehead. Sending a wave of energy to her heart, as the orange energy zooms straight to her heart as it glows ever so brightly through her skin. Showing a little animation of a keyhole on her heart and it was magically unlocked.

VIOLET felt different, her heart was… lighter… no more steel, no more hiding behind the armor she built so long ago. She stood up from her chair and smiled.

VIOLET

I feel different… I feel… uh…

JUSTIN

Happier? (He smiles awkwardly)

VIOLET

I think so… (She turns to Justin) Huh… you handsome Jus.

JUSTIN

Thank you… (He laughs a little) Violet, I think it worked.

VIOLET

How?!

JUSTIN

You complimented me… you rarely do that.

VIOLET realizing this had her eyes prop up like a map being opened up and down.

VIOLET

You’re right… I… I am happy. I feel happy! And… I love Edith Nox! (She closes her mouth)

Realizing she said that aloud, she reached a new level of happiness. She jumps for joy and hugs JUSTIN.

VIOLET (cont’d)

I’m happy! (She says with glee)

JUSTIN

That’s amazing! Now… let me ask you this. What would Edith like on a dinner date?

VIOLET thinks to herself.

VIOLET

She loves music.

JUSTIN

Do you guys have any love songs? Like before the apocalypse?

VIOLET

There are several… but I don’t think they’d be good.

JUSTIN smirks again, now holding his phone in his hand.

JUSTIN

(He smiles) Luckily you have a friend, who's an alien, from another universe. Who also happens to live on Earth.

VIOLET

This is gonna be perfect. (She smiles once more)

CUT TO:

INT. ASTRIFEROUS GROVE. NIGHT

The stage has been set, no literally. JUSTIN had used the 3D Digital Construction Box and digitally built a wooden deck that filled the surroundings of the grove. Complete with a table meant for VIOLET & EDITH and a piano. JUSTIN had set up fairy lights along the surrounding trees to help with the lighting. To accent the glowing and enormous lapis lazuli rocks.

There were other lights to help brighten up the stage. The sound of the stream nearby made things seem so peaceful. Everyone was there, JUSTIN, NOEMI, PERIWINKLE, ARGENTO. They all had a hand in helping to make this date perfect. The Wooden Deck also came with a perfect kitchen, to which JUSTIN had the ultimate experience of knowing how to cook, having spent time with his adopted human father.

JUSTIN had prepared a series of Hawaiian foods, due to growing up in Hawaii for a few years of his life. From appetizers to dessert, it was all prepared. NOEMI & ARGENTO have dressed accordingly as waiter and waitress.

JUSTIN

You guys ready?

NOEMI

This is gonna be great! I still can’t believe Violet likes Edith!

ARGENTO

Ok! First Thanks for inviting me! Second, (She turns toward Justin) You’re an alien! I can’t believe that! Three, this is so friggin romantic! (She squeals joyfulness with each sentence)

PERIWINKLE

THIS IS REALLY PRETTY! I CAN’T WAIT!

JUSTIN

We’re all ready! Noemi, Argento! You are the waiters and you shall deliver the food! Peri, I want you to take them to their seats after that set the mood. (He whispers in her ear)

They all break, as the food had already been prepared and they take their places. VIOLET & EDITH had shown up with EDITH wearing a blindfold.

EDITH

Where are we going?!

VIOLET

It’s a practice dinner… when I meet with the boy again…

Having seen JUSTIN in the distance and PERIWINKLE on a stepping stool near her hand. She was the Restaurant Host. VIOLET takes the blindfold off of EDITH and both smile. EDITH takes her excitement to a new level, as her containment was held by VIOLET’S hands who she placed on EDITH’S shoulders.

VIOLET

Hi Peri! Our reservations?

PERIWINKLE

Right, this way you two!

She steps off her stool and holds both VIOLET & EDITH’S hands. Standing in the middle of both of them, leading them to the only table in the center of the huge deck. They both sit on the chairs, and PERIWINKLE had presented them with the menu of what’s to come.

PERIWINKLE

Welcome to… Astriferous Grove! Chef Justin has prepared an alternate universe main course from his universe. Your waiters will be my big brother, Noemi and the love of his life Argento.

JUSTIN had some lyricless music, play as it was a simple tune, a peaceful beat. (Play Monday Loop by Tomppabeats until you see stop) (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2z8CSRP_ok) PERIWINKLE summons her wind constructed wings and rises to the sky. She sets the mood, she manipulates the wind with her magic. Creating a light breeze having the trees sway to the beat of the music. NOEMI & ARGENTO show up as waiters, handing them the menu of what to expect to eat.

NOEMI

For your appetizers, expect a… (He grabs the menu from Edith) Spicy Ahi… Poke (Po-kay) and a Spam Musubi.

ARGENTO For the main course, Loco Moco. A bed of rice topped with a cooked burger patty and a sunny side up egg. Drenched with gravy with hints of chili flakes due to the liking of spiciness.

NOEMI

And for dessert. Malasadas, Coco Puffs, Chocolate Hau- Haupia… Pie. With Shave Ice.

ARGENTO

Let’s start off with drinks. Water?

EDITH

I’d love some water! (She speaks with a boyish voice.)

VIOLET

Water as well, please.

NOEMI with his wings flies over to the kitchen counter and holds a plated dish to carry the cups of water. ARGENTO placing them down on their specific side of the table. They both disappear to the kitchen leaving EDITH & VIOLET to talk alone. Having the uncaged excitement she bursts with such happiness.

EDITH

OH MY GOD, THIS IS SO FRICKEN ROMANTIC AS EDEN!

VIOLET smiles.

EDITH (cont’d)

DUDE YOU’RE SMILING! (She wiggles in her seat)

VIOLET

I know I am. (She laughs)

EDITH

Everything about this place is perfect! The glowing lapis lazuli! The little lights! The swaying breeze and the music! AND FOOD FROM A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE! AH!

VIOLET

I’m glad you love it! (She smiled)

EDITH

Love it? I’m infatuated with this! This is so romantic! Wish someone would do this for me.

VIOLET

Well… since you're my dinner date right now… I’m doing this for you.

EDITH

Why thank you, your highness!

NOEMI & ARGENTO return with the appetizers, a bowl of Spicy Ahi Poke (Po-kay), and a spam musubi. Both grab a fork and dig into the first dish. The forks stabbed into the dish, the prongs had easily pierced the raw tuna marinated with sriracha mayonnaise. Cutting part of the rice with it and scooping it up and taking the first bite. Their eyes brighten as their taste buds had taken the first bite.

The taste of the spicy ahi was unique. The cold and raw tuna had sent that chill, it was as if there was dance was going on. The combined spice from the sriracha mayo, combating with the chill and made it all too delectable. The crunch of the sliced up scallions was heard and the small bed of rice of its warm heat calms both elemental flavors of spice and chill. Leaving behind the everlasting heat, but the chill that was a simple breeze.

VIOLET

(With her mouth full and eyes closed) That’s so good!

EDITH had probably seen the face of God… well, in this case, she already has seen them. She was the same as VIOLET eyes closed and internally happy with her mouth full. They finished the bowl, holding their faces.

EDITH

OH MY GOD, THAT’S THE TASTE OF HAWAII?! I LOVE IT! (She had tears of joy.)

The move on to the Spam Musubi, this rectangle sushi like creation. This version is shown two spams, one of each on both top and bottom. Wrapped in the middle was a seaweed wrap, the spam had a lightish brown sauce underneath.

NOEMI

Justin suggests eating this with your hands. Better experience.

They do so, and their first bite was… well, it was delicious. The saltiness of the spam was laid out as a bed on their tongues. The sweet teriyaki sauce made the salt taste all to better. The moistness of the seaweed complimented the heat of the rice. They were in love all over again, knowing the taste of Hawaiian food made this dinner date all too delectable.

NOEMI & ARGENTO had taken away their appetizer plates and return to the kitchen. Where JUSTIN had been all too articulate with serving them their main course.

JUSTIN

Did they enjoy?!

NOEMI

They did!

JUSTIN

Awesome! I have some plates for you guys too. Peri is actually eating the ones made for her right now. (He points to his right)

PERIWINKLE had her eyes closed as she had gone to Food Heaven.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

Just finish serving them and you guys get to enjoy your plates.

NOEMI & ARGENTO both look at each other and grab the main course. Loco Moco. A dish with a bed of steaming rice topped with a cooked burger patty and a sunny side up egg. With gravy poured over all the dish. VIOLET & EDITH grab knives and forks.

They dig in immediately, the heat from the patty and rice sent the sensation of a fire steaming in their mouths. The yolk of the egg was cut open as the slice let the yolk runs down every inch of the dish. The yolk had made the gravy more delectable and the chili flakes kicked in the spiciness added to the dish. They felt the same feelings as before.

Dessert had arrived immediately, as NOEMI & ARGENTO were so eager to try JUSTIN’S cooking. They take away their dinner plates and immediately return to the kitchen. They see their plates dinners ready and rises up to Food Heaven.

Desert for VIOLET & EDITH was sugar galore. The Malasadas was like biting off a piece off a cloud of fluffiness. The fluffiness of the bread had released pockets of warmness on their taste buds. The sugar complimented the taste as the sweetness added an entire level.

They move onto the Coco Puffs, it was chilled to the point where the bread had this stale-ish taste. Although the cream filling inside chilled inside made the taste of it ultra better. VIOLET had taken a like to the custard coco puff, as it oozed custard filling. As well again, the chill of the desert. While EDITH enjoyed the chocolate cocoa puff as the chocolate filling was a different taste.

The penultimate one was this gorgeous looking pie with whipped cream covering a haupia layer and chocolate filling inside. IT too was chilling and the coldness of the desert was all too tasteful. VIOLET loving every single cold desert, she hadn’t noticed that her ice magic was crawling up on her. EDITH was a major sweet tooth and couldn’t stop eating and wanted more.

EDITH

THIS IS SO GOOD! (She cries out)

VIOLET

Can we just live in Justin’s universe?! I WANT HAWAII FOOD FOREVER!

Their last and final dessert was Shave Ice. A Hawaiian snow cone, but is way massive than what normally people expect. The colors of the rainbow surrounded it. Eating ice with different flavors was rather addicting, as the colors laid down on their tongues and the over sprinkled sugar had caused them to go into a state of insanity for the moment.  

The Dinner Date had ended, both VIOLET & EDITH were full. Sitting on their chairs like they eat half of a feast made for kings and queens from near and far.

EDITH

I’m so full… (She rubs her tummy as she moans in agony)

VIOLET

Me too… but it was all worth it.

EDITH

Yeah… it was. (She smiles a little but places her head on the table)

JUSTIN appears near their table. (Monday Loop STOPS PLAYING)

JUSTIN

I suggest you guys move around to help with the digestion.

He nudges VIOLET, motioning her to a dance floor near the stage. JUSTIN suddenly appears at the piano, ready to play a song. He speaks into a mic.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

Alrighty… this lovely night special night for a Princess and her soon to be the love of her life. Uh… what his name Violet?

VIOLET

Um… uh… Edward… Edward Lux.

EDITH

Aw, cute!

JUSTIN

Alright. Let’s dance.

JUSTIN places both hands on the piano keys, ready to play. Feeling the ivory material under his fingertips. He plays the song Your Song by Elton John.

JUSTIN (cont’d)

Uh… grab a partner.

Being that VIOLET & EDITH were the only ones on the dance floor. They realized JUSTIN meant the two of them to dance.

VIOLET

Oh… I think he means you and me.

EDITH

Oh, makes sense. Considering were the only ones on the dance floor and since I am filling in for Edward. May I have this dance? (she does a bow as respect)

VIOLET smiles and returns the bow and they begin to dance. JUSTIN begins to play the song. He sings the song which surprises everyone around, hearing a voice of what some would describe as an angel or an even a god. He didn’t prefer either title despite literally being a god himself. He was just a simple alien boy playing and singing music.  

 VIOLET (V.O)

Justin, you always surprise everyone, don’t you? (She smiles)

EDITH

OH MY EDEN! HE CAN SING TOO?!

They danced to the song, suddenly they see waves of colorful light of the sound of the song. They look at on and continue to dance. EDITH with her magic senses the feelings of happiness all around. VIOLET inside was having the time of her life. Dancing with the girl she deeply, deeply loves.

After the dance, JUSTIN speaks again.

JUSTIN

I’d like to make a mention of my little sister, Hathor. Who is an amazing artist and comes from a planet where art is taken to a whole new level. Violet… I think it’s time to say what you need to say.

VIOLET comes to the stage and is handed the microphone by JUSTIN.

VIOLET Ok… um… I’m not very good at this. But… uh… I never admitted something like this before… so please just… uh… bear with me,(She breathes in, then out.) I love you. I know that’s so broad and out there but… I really and truly love you. The first time I met you, I hated you. It was unreasonable and I… I’m so so sorry. I blamed you for the one thing I couldn’t control… and I felt so terrible about it. But over the course of our story, we became friends. You defeated the one thing I couldn’t and gave me a reason to keep going despite all the painful and aching memories. And that… after all that… my heart just longed for you. You filled the missing piece of me that was ripped away by that monster. And I held this in for so, so long, and I can’t wait any longer.

She steps off the stage and walks up to EDITH. Her eyes were teary-eyed, like shiny stars. Gleaming with the colors of the glowing lapis lazuli. Her heart of steel along with ice had been unlocked and melted away. It was gleaming every essence of “True Love” had resonated.  

VIOLET (cont’d)

Edith Nox… I love you.

EDITH’S heart had stopped for that one moment. Her magic revealed to her senses that VIOLET’S aura was glowing pink aka love. Actual and true love for her. JUSTIN plays the piano, playing song Can’t Help Falling In Love by Elvis Presley. VIOLET steps a few paces back and begins to sing the song.

EDITH begins to cry tears of joy after feelings of VIOLET even more through the song she sang. NOEMI, ARGENTO & PERIWINKLE dance in a circle with all hands together. The songs ends and VIOLET sees EDITH standing in the same spot, unresponsive.

VIOLET (cont’d)

Look… I know this was a huge surprise… but I don’t know… I love you and if you don’t share the same feelings I understand.

She begins to ramble but EDITH taking her by surprise gives her a kiss. NOEMI, ARGENTO, & PERIWINKLE cheer for them. JUSTIN sits on his piano chair and smiles at the fact this mission was a total success. With their heads pressed against each other and eyes closed.

EDITH

I love you too, Violet Choi.

She laughs which makes VIOLET give her a kiss in return.

Hidden within the darkness was the shadow of the slime and sneaky frog man, VODNIK. With his magic floating orb.

VODNIK

Mistress, we found them.

NEYDOLYA

Start the spell. (She says to herself) It has begun. (She has this malicious smile on her face)

FADE TO BLACK

END OF EPISODE 8

[orbemnews]

What to do if you're planning or attending a wedding during the pandemic “Everything was changing,” said Chalmers, a Toronto-based marketing manager whose nuptials were originally planned for May 2020, two months after her province’s coronavirus lockdowns began. “In March 2020, it felt like every day something would happen that was kind of like another nail in the coffin for our wedding.” The couple, who’d gotten engaged in 2018, quickly shifted gears, opting for a small wedding on their July dating anniversary in Chalmers’ parents’ backyard and rescheduling their big reception for May 2021. They ultimately canceled the latter, for good, in light of Ontario’s recent Covid-19 case surge. “We just realized it wasn’t going to be the day that we wanted,” Chalmers added. “With travel restrictions and the (slow) vaccination rollout, we just knew that people wouldn’t feel safe.” Having to plan a wedding during normal times “is stressful enough,” she added, but an additional burden was having “to worry like, ‘Oh, somebody might get sick and die as a result of coming to my wedding.'” The small, outdoor ceremony Chalmers and Mitchell had is one lower-risk way to get married during the pandemic. But as coronavirus restrictions loosen, some couples are opting for more elaborate celebrations, and opening the door to a host of new anxieties, standards and etiquette rules in the process. Either way, experts say prioritizing the safety of your community as well as your guests is paramount. That includes working with local health officials and paying attention to local regulations, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention advises. “Until things get better, I think we just have to find innovative ways to still be able to enjoy ourselves, celebrate the coming (together) of two individuals and do it in a safe way,” said Dr. Ada Stewart, a family physician with Cooperative Health in Columbia, South Carolina, and the president of the American Academy of Family Physicians. What pandemic weddings can look like The CDC has continued to recommend that people avoid large gatherings, regardless of vaccination status. Coronavirus spreads when infected people cough, sneeze or talk and others breathe in those droplets, and when coronavirus accumulates in, or flows through, the air. People can catch coronavirus on contaminated surfaces, too, but this is a much lower risk, according to the CDC. That’s what makes weddings — particularly indoor ones — potentially risky. Lots of people possibly packed into the same area, talking, laughing, eating, drinking and dancing — maybe even hugging and kissing — creates an ideal environment for the virus to thrive. A high or increasing number of Covid-19 cases in the area where the event is happening — or in areas where guests are traveling from — only heightens that risk. Ventilation quality is another factor that can makes indoor weddings more precarious. Outdoor weddings, like the one Chalmers and Mitchell had, of course naturally avoid that concern. “A totally outdoor wedding (is) very low risk, even with people who are of unknown vaccination status,” said CNN Medical Analyst Dr. Leana Wen, an emergency physician and visiting professor of health policy and management at the George Washington University Milken Institute School of Public Health. Chalmers and Mitchell said their vows under a wooden pergola, surrounded by her parents’ backyard garden. “Our florist put up a golden arch and decorated it with flowers,” she said via email. “Friends of ours who own a theatre company came earlier in the day and used their props to set up our signing table which had an ‘old train station’ vibe, which was really special as my husband loves trains.” Chalmers and Mitchell also livestreamed their small ceremony and reception so that other loved ones could virtually attend. Virtual weddings are always a safe option — and what the CDC has advised for those who can’t implement Covid-19 safety precautions. Chalmers’ wedding was intimate, but it left her feeling a bit wistful. “I still remember that moment after we got married and we walked back up our very tiny aisle in my parents’ back garden,” Chalmers recalled. “That really hit me … that I always imagined that moment with all our friends and family being there and that they weren’t there. And also, because of Covid, I couldn’t even hug my family members who were there.” Indoor weddings are riskier, but doable if couples modify tradition to be as safe as possible. Whether proof of vaccination is required at the wedding “changes everything,” Wen said. “If everyone is fully vaccinated, there may not need to be restrictions.” Weddings without full vaccination mandates may have guests who are unvaccinated or partially vaccinated, which is why it’s important to consider the setting, Wen said. The safety of a wedding venue may partly depend on the ability to modify layouts or seating so that people from different households can be at least 6 feet apart. “We create signage off of (the stationery that the couple has used throughout the planning process), reminding guests to socially distance 6 feet apart,” said Desireé Dent, the president and lead planner of Dejanae Events, a Chicago-based wedding and event planning company. “We’ve used, like, little animated people with the arrows with the words ‘6 feet’ in between the arrows. … It’s in a 8-by-10 frame so that they can see it. We usually set it up on a highboy.” Indoor air quality matters too. Work with venue managers to ensure measures for well-ventilated rooms are in place, including the ability to open windows or doors when possible. High ceilings, window fans and HEPA (high-efficiency particulate air) filters can help as well — as can properly functioning HVAC (heating, ventilation and air conditioning) systems that deliver clean air and dilute potential contaminants. There is no need for high-tech disinfecting systems, which the US Food and Drug Administration, Environmental Protection Agency, and other government agencies rarely have proven effective. Simplifying to reduce Covid-19 risk The more people and the more crowded together they are, the higher the chances of spreading coronavirus if someone is infected. Couples can pare down capacity by going through their guest list and deciding who has to be at the wedding, Dent said. Sizing depends on the venue, but the number “in 2020, when we were in the heat of it, was 50 or less,” Dent said. Even if you plan an outdoor wedding, you still “don’t want to over-invite,” Dent said. “If the weather does not agree with you on that day, you’re going to have to move people inside. And now we run into a situation of not having enough spacing.” Consider your most important relationships, “and then from there, really think about your friend group,” Dent said. “Is it your best friend? Or is it a person that you’ve befriended at work that could potentially understand that they are not necessarily invited to this ceremony?” The duration of the wedding also affects Covid-19 risk. “Being within 6 feet of someone who has COVID-19 for a total of 15 minutes or more (over a 24-hour period) greatly increases the risk of becoming infected and requires quarantine,” the CDC has said. So, longer events are riskier than shorter events. Cutting the event short could mean not having a reception — which might also address concerns around coronavirus spreading as people share a meal. The problem with eating “is people taking off their masks to eat if they are in close proximity with one another,” Wen said. “If everybody’s spaced at least 6 feet apart, not a concern outdoors. But if they are close together and taking off their masks to eat, that increases risk.” If you do serve food, seat housemates at their own tables and at least 6 feet away from others. Avoid buffet-type meals since everyone would be touching the same serving utensils, Stewart said. “The meals have been plated (and) brought to the guest,” Dent said of pandemic weddings she has planned. “Because we all have to remain seated when you are drinking and eating, the idea of passed hors d’oeuvres has been removed. … Each one of them are put on an individual plate, which has been covered in some form.” Dancing — and specifically breathing heavier while doing so — can also make receptions higher risk, Wen said. “The only way to do that safely is to ensure that everyone there is vaccinated, and if that’s not possible for some reason, to be quarantined and tested.” If you allow dancing, have people who live in the same household dance next to their own tables, Dent said. “The dances with parents, the couple’s first dance, the cake cutting, those ceremonial moments that you see in many weddings — those still take place because they’re, in a sense, one-on-one,” Dent said. “You just need to have a space within the environment.” Fully vaccinated people can take photos together outdoors and unmasked if they are at least 6 feet away from others. Unvaccinated and vaccinated people photographed together should wear masks. Avoid activities like bouquet tosses that could encourage people to crowd together, Stewart suggested. And instead of having a guest book that requires everyone using the same pen, have a small card and pen at every seat that guests can sign and leave to be picked up. “Now it becomes more of a scrapbook of small, little handwritten cards versus one guest book,” Dent said. Ensuring everyone is as safe as possible You can help guests reduce risk by providing “sanitation stations” at venue entrances and throughout, Dent said. Those could include hand sanitizer, disposable masks or custom masks made for your wedding. Providing on-site testing is also an option if you have the means, said Regina Davis Moss, the associate executive director of health policy and practice at the American Public Health Association. Some venues and hotels “are offering that, particularly when you have guests that are traveling from different places, and some states require a negative test before you return,” Davis Moss said. But know that test results may not reflect whether someone was just exposed to coronavirus but hasn’t been infected long enough for test results to be positive, she added. Some couples are hiring Covid-19 compliance officers to help politely enforce safety precautions like physical distancing, said Annie Lee, the principal planner for award-winning wedding and event planning company Daughter of Design. Plannie, founded by Lee, is an online platform through which people can book local planners to work for events on an hourly basis. “Through that, we also added on Covid compliance officers that you can hire,” Lee said. “It’s not the planner’s job (nor) the venue’s job to also then have to be monitoring the guests and their masks and whatever other rules there might be.” Managing expectations and pandemic wedding etiquette If you plan to limit your guest list or require proof of full Covid-19 vaccination, having those conversations might be awkward. “It is up to you, as the organizer, to set the rules,” Wen said. “You could very well say, as an example, ‘the health and safety of our wedding guests is our top priority. Vaccines protect everyone. We are therefore requesting that people attending must be fully vaccinated as defined by two weeks after their second dose of Pfizer or the Moderna vaccine, or two weeks after their Johnson & Johnson vaccine.'” To children and adult guests who are unable to be vaccinated, you could offer that they instead quarantine and test, Wen added. “One test in the 24-hour period before the wedding is probably sufficient.” “You can also frame it, if you wish, as ‘There’ll be people attending who are particularly vulnerable, and it’s important for us to help them attend. That’s the reason why we’re asking for your help,'” Wen said. “Make it about what it really is, which is protecting health.” Since invitations can give only so much information, Dent suggested communicating your Covid-19 measures via a wedding website. “You can address questions and answers on your website as well as if you are requiring proof of vaccination or proof of a negative Covid test. That information can be collected there, or you could give them instructions on how to send it to you,” she said. “I know couples that have sent (an electronic) waiver to their guests and requiring that they sign it.” As a guest, if you’d have to travel long distance to a wedding, you may have additional issues to consider depending on your vaccination status: Unvaccinated people are still advised by the CDC to stay home, but should get tested one to three days before their trip, for example, and three to five days after they arrive home. Regardless of your second test result, you should also quarantine for seven days. If you’ve been invited to a wedding that won’t have safety measures in place and want to share your concerns, how you do that depends on your relationship with the couple, Wen said. “If you are very close and feel comfortable with it, consider calling and having a frank conversation. … Perhaps they haven’t thought about the benefit of these safety measures. Perhaps they’ll hear from multiple guests and consider implementing new measures,” Wen said. “Think about attending a portion of the ceremony but not another — for example, an outdoor ceremony itself but not the indoor banquet. At the end of the day, you could consider telling them your true reason: that you are concerned about your own health.” Source link Orbem News #Areweddingssafetogotoorplaninapandemic?Aguide-CNN #attending #Health #Pandemic #planning #wedding #youre

[dipulb3]

What to do if you're planning or attending a wedding during the pandemic

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/what-to-do-if-youre-planning-or-attending-a-wedding-during-the-pandemic/

What to do if you're planning or attending a wedding during the pandemic

“Everything was changing,” said Chalmers, a Toronto-based marketing manager whose nuptials were originally planned for May 2020, two months after her province’s coronavirus lockdowns began. “In March 2020, it felt like every day something would happen that was kind of like another nail in the coffin for our wedding.”

The couple, who’d gotten engaged in 2018, quickly shifted gears, opting for a small wedding on their July dating anniversary in Chalmers’ parents’ backyard and rescheduling their big reception for May 2021. They ultimately canceled the latter, for good, in light of Ontario’s recent Covid-19 case surge.

“We just realized it wasn’t going to be the day that we wanted,” Chalmers added. “With travel restrictions and the (slow) vaccination rollout, we just knew that people wouldn’t feel safe.”

Having to plan a wedding during normal times “is stressful enough,” she added, but an additional burden was having “to worry like, ‘Oh, somebody might get sick and die as a result of coming to my wedding.'”

The small, outdoor ceremony Chalmers and Mitchell had is one lower-risk way to get married during the pandemic. But as coronavirus restrictions loosen, some couples are opting for more elaborate celebrations, and opening the door to a host of new anxieties, standards and etiquette rules in the process.

Either way, experts say prioritizing the safety of your community as well as your guests is paramount. That includes working with local health officials and paying attention to local regulations, the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention advises.

“Until things get better, I think we just have to find innovative ways to still be able to enjoy ourselves, celebrate the coming (together) of two individuals and do it in a safe way,” said Dr. Ada Stewart, a family physician with Cooperative Health in Columbia, South Carolina, and the president of the American Academy of Family Physicians.

What pandemic weddings can look like

The CDC has continued to recommend that people avoid large gatherings, regardless of vaccination status. Coronavirus spreads when infected people cough, sneeze or talk and others breathe in those droplets, and when coronavirus accumulates in, or flows through, the air. People can catch coronavirus on contaminated surfaces, too, but this is a much lower risk, according to the CDC.

That’s what makes weddings — particularly indoor ones — potentially risky. Lots of people possibly packed into the same area, talking, laughing, eating, drinking and dancing — maybe even hugging and kissing — creates an ideal environment for the virus to thrive. A high or increasing number of Covid-19 cases in the area where the event is happening — or in areas where guests are traveling from — only heightens that risk.

Ventilation quality is another factor that can makes indoor weddings more precarious. Outdoor weddings, like the one Chalmers and Mitchell had, of course naturally avoid that concern.

“A totally outdoor wedding (is) very low risk, even with people who are of unknown vaccination status,” said Appradab Medical Analyst Dr. Leana Wen, an emergency physician and visiting professor of health policy and management at the George Washington University Milken Institute School of Public Health.

Chalmers and Mitchell said their vows under a wooden pergola, surrounded by her parents’ backyard garden. “Our florist put up a golden arch and decorated it with flowers,” she said via email. “Friends of ours who own a theatre company came earlier in the day and used their props to set up our signing table which had an ‘old train station’ vibe, which was really special as my husband loves trains.”

Chalmers and Mitchell also livestreamed their small ceremony and reception so that other loved ones could virtually attend. Virtual weddings are always a safe option — and what the CDC has advised for those who can’t implement Covid-19 safety precautions.

Chalmers’ wedding was intimate, but it left her feeling a bit wistful.

“I still remember that moment after we got married and we walked back up our very tiny aisle in my parents’ back garden,” Chalmers recalled. “That really hit me … that I always imagined that moment with all our friends and family being there and that they weren’t there. And also, because of Covid, I couldn’t even hug my family members who were there.”

Indoor weddings are riskier, but doable if couples modify tradition to be as safe as possible.

Whether proof of vaccination is required at the wedding “changes everything,” Wen said. “If everyone is fully vaccinated, there may not need to be restrictions.”

Weddings without full vaccination mandates may have guests who are unvaccinated or partially vaccinated, which is why it’s important to consider the setting, Wen said.

The safety of a wedding venue may partly depend on the ability to modify layouts or seating so that people from different households can be at least 6 feet apart.

“We create signage off of (the stationery that the couple has used throughout the planning process), reminding guests to socially distance 6 feet apart,” said Desireé Dent, the president and lead planner of Dejanae Events, a Chicago-based wedding and event planning company.

“We’ve used, like, little animated people with the arrows with the words ‘6 feet’ in between the arrows. … It’s in a 8-by-10 frame so that they can see it. We usually set it up on a highboy.”

Indoor air quality matters too. Work with venue managers to ensure measures for well-ventilated rooms are in place, including the ability to open windows or doors when possible. High ceilings, window fans and HEPA (high-efficiency particulate air) filters can help as well — as can properly functioning HVAC (heating, ventilation and air conditioning) systems that deliver clean air and dilute potential contaminants. There is no need for high-tech disinfecting systems, which the US Food and Drug Administration, Environmental Protection Agency, and other government agencies rarely have proven effective.

Simplifying to reduce Covid-19 risk

The more people and the more crowded together they are, the higher the chances of spreading coronavirus if someone is infected. Couples can pare down capacity by going through their guest list and deciding who has to be at the wedding, Dent said.

Sizing depends on the venue, but the number “in 2020, when we were in the heat of it, was 50 or less,” Dent said.

Even if you plan an outdoor wedding, you still “don’t want to over-invite,” Dent said. “If the weather does not agree with you on that day, you’re going to have to move people inside. And now we run into a situation of not having enough spacing.”

Consider your most important relationships, “and then from there, really think about your friend group,” Dent said. “Is it your best friend? Or is it a person that you’ve befriended at work that could potentially understand that they are not necessarily invited to this ceremony?”

The duration of the wedding also affects Covid-19 risk. “Being within 6 feet of someone who has COVID-19 for a total of 15 minutes or more (over a 24-hour period) greatly increases the risk of becoming infected and requires quarantine,” the CDC has said. So, longer events are riskier than shorter events.

Cutting the event short could mean not having a reception — which might also address concerns around coronavirus spreading as people share a meal.

The problem with eating “is people taking off their masks to eat if they are in close proximity with one another,” Wen said. “If everybody’s spaced at least 6 feet apart, not a concern outdoors. But if they are close together and taking off their masks to eat, that increases risk.”

If you do serve food, seat housemates at their own tables and at least 6 feet away from others. Avoid buffet-type meals since everyone would be touching the same serving utensils, Stewart said.

“The meals have been plated (and) brought to the guest,” Dent said of pandemic weddings she has planned. “Because we all have to remain seated when you are drinking and eating, the idea of passed hors d’oeuvres has been removed. … Each one of them are put on an individual plate, which has been covered in some form.”

Dancing — and specifically breathing heavier while doing so — can also make receptions higher risk, Wen said. “The only way to do that safely is to ensure that everyone there is vaccinated, and if that’s not possible for some reason, to be quarantined and tested.”

If you allow dancing, have people who live in the same household dance next to their own tables, Dent said.

“The dances with parents, the couple’s first dance, the cake cutting, those ceremonial moments that you see in many weddings — those still take place because they’re, in a sense, one-on-one,” Dent said. “You just need to have a space within the environment.”

Fully vaccinated people can take photos together outdoors and unmasked if they are at least 6 feet away from others. Unvaccinated and vaccinated people photographed together should wear masks.

Avoid activities like bouquet tosses that could encourage people to crowd together, Stewart suggested. And instead of having a guest book that requires everyone using the same pen, have a small card and pen at every seat that guests can sign and leave to be picked up.

“Now it becomes more of a scrapbook of small, little handwritten cards versus one guest book,” Dent said.

Ensuring everyone is as safe as possible

You can help guests reduce risk by providing “sanitation stations” at venue entrances and throughout, Dent said. Those could include hand sanitizer, disposable masks or custom masks made for your wedding.

Providing on-site testing is also an option if you have the means, said Regina Davis Moss, the associate executive director of health policy and practice at the American Public Health Association. Some venues and hotels “are offering that, particularly when you have guests that are traveling from different places, and some states require a negative test before you return,” Davis Moss said.

But know that test results may not reflect whether someone was just exposed to coronavirus but hasn’t been infected long enough for test results to be positive, she added.

Some couples are hiring Covid-19 compliance officers to help politely enforce safety precautions like physical distancing, said Annie Lee, the principal planner for award-winning wedding and event planning company Daughter of Design. Plannie, founded by Lee, is an online platform through which people can book local planners to work for events on an hourly basis.

“Through that, we also added on Covid compliance officers that you can hire,” Lee said. “It’s not the planner’s job (nor) the venue’s job to also then have to be monitoring the guests and their masks and whatever other rules there might be.”

Managing expectations and pandemic wedding etiquette

If you plan to limit your guest list or require proof of full Covid-19 vaccination, having those conversations might be awkward.

“It is up to you, as the organizer, to set the rules,” Wen said. “You could very well say, as an example, ‘the health and safety of our wedding guests is our top priority. Vaccines protect everyone. We are therefore requesting that people attending must be fully vaccinated as defined by two weeks after their second dose of Pfizer or the Moderna vaccine, or two weeks after their Johnson & Johnson vaccine.'”

To children and adult guests who are unable to be vaccinated, you could offer that they instead quarantine and test, Wen added. “One test in the 24-hour period before the wedding is probably sufficient.”

“You can also frame it, if you wish, as ‘There’ll be people attending who are particularly vulnerable, and it’s important for us to help them attend. That’s the reason why we’re asking for your help,'” Wen said. “Make it about what it really is, which is protecting health.”

Since invitations can give only so much information, Dent suggested communicating your Covid-19 measures via a wedding website.

“You can address questions and answers on your website as well as if you are requiring proof of vaccination or proof of a negative Covid test. That information can be collected there, or you could give them instructions on how to send it to you,” she said. “I know couples that have sent (an electronic) waiver to their guests and requiring that they sign it.”

As a guest, if you’d have to travel long distance to a wedding, you may have additional issues to consider depending on your vaccination status: Unvaccinated people are still advised by the CDC to stay home, but should get tested one to three days before their trip, for example, and three to five days after they arrive home. Regardless of your second test result, you should also quarantine for seven days.

If you’ve been invited to a wedding that won’t have safety measures in place and want to share your concerns, how you do that depends on your relationship with the couple, Wen said.

“If you are very close and feel comfortable with it, consider calling and having a frank conversation. … Perhaps they haven’t thought about the benefit of these safety measures. Perhaps they’ll hear from multiple guests and consider implementing new measures,” Wen said. “Think about attending a portion of the ceremony but not another — for example, an outdoor ceremony itself but not the indoor banquet. At the end of the day, you could consider telling them your true reason: that you are concerned about your own health.”

[framedepth]

Return of the Living Dead and the Best Zombie Film of All Time

1985 is a year that has not yet been surpassed in terms of zombie cinema. Only one month apart, two movies came out that distilled just about everything great about these types of movies. They are on totally opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of tone (and zombie type), but that only serves to show the range of the genre that has gone totally in the direction of the more well known film, George Romero’s magnum opus Day of the Dead. But I want to make a case for the movie I prefer out of the two, but only slightly. Dan O’Bannon’s Return of the Living Dead is perhaps the most fun film I have ever seen, and it contains everything I love about zombies while also being maybe the most fresh take on them.

The general premise of the film is something that delights me all on its own. A psuedo-sequel to the classic Night of the Living Dead, but not the well-known 1968 movie. It is a continuation of the supposed events that inspired the original movie, which I find to be such a unique idea. According to this film, sometime before NotLD was made, an experimental chemical called 2-4-5 Trioxin was reeased in a morgue that made all of the corpses come back to life. The bodies were placed into barrels, and a shipping error by the military gets one of the barrels sent to a medical supply center in Louisville, Kentucky. A young punk named Freddie (Thom Matthews) is relayed this information whilst being trained for his new job by Frank (James Karen) and Burt (Clu Gulager). Outside, Freddie’s friends Suicide (Mark Venturini), Trash (Leana Quigley), Spider (Miguel A. Núñez Jr.), Chuck (John Philbin), Casey (Jewel Shephard), Scuz (Brian Peck) and his girlfriend Tina (Beverly Randolph) arrive to pick him up from work, and decide to party in a graveyard until he’s off work. Once the dead start rising, we also meet Ernie (Don Calfa), an eccentric mortician who works in the cemetery. The rest of the movie is simply survival as more and more people are zombified and turn on the living.

I am in love with every aspect of this movie. It seems like director Dan O’Bannon, more well known as the screenwriter of Alien, personally oversaw ever facet of production in order to make every element as entertaining as possible. Every actor does their job so wonderfully, from the younger, less experienced punks to the older and absolutely wonderful character actors who are clearly just letting loose. James Karen’s chemistry with Thom Matthews is so delightful that they had to bring them in again (to much lesser effect, unfortunately) in the sequel. The juxtaposition between actors like Clu Gulager and Miguel Núñez works so well to show the fact that the characters really have to overcome their differences in order to survive. The late Mark Venturini delivers his lines with so much energy and anger that every single one of them stick with you and instantly feels iconic. The actors are funny, appropriately terrified when need be, and sympathetic. I also find their wardrobes to be memorable and very well thought out, as they instantly show you who they are just at a glance.

But the real reason this is the best zombie movie ever made is because of the zombies themselves. Oddly enough, aspects of them have really stuck in the pop-culture due to the fact that this is the movie that created the notion of zombies only eating brains. Outside of this movie, that idea has been run into the ground by jokes and parodies, but it never feels hokey or played out in the context of the film. Each one is very well designed, with older corpses appropriately looking dried out while more recent ones still ooze blood. Their speech is incredibly eerie, each one having a strange, distorted voice that isn’t exactly human. They’re fast and completely unkillable, which makes them the most dangerous zombies in any film. The real star zombie is The Tarman (Allan Trautman), a gooey, lanky corpse that emerges from the barrel of 2-4-5 Trioxide in the beginning of the film. No matter which version of the movie you watch (his voice was altered in later releases of the film), he has the most fascinating voice. Trautman really sells being a twenty-year old corpse, and moves in this fluid, dance-like way that is just intoxicating. There’s no question in my mind that he is the best zombie ever put to film.

The other aspect of the film I cannot fail to mention is the incredible soundtrack. Return of the Living Dead is also a punk film, through and through, and therefor contains a soundtrack filled to the brim with some great songs. The Cramps, 45 Grave, The Flesh Eaters, T.S.O.L., The Damned, and a few others are all used in very memorable ways throughout the film, but the real highlight ends up being Roky Erickson’s “Burn the Flames”, which is used in the best possible way in maybe the best scene in the movie (and was a moment that was suggested by James Karen). The main theme composed by Matt Clifford is also incredibly catchy, creepy, and memorable. Whenever it is used in the film, it adds a great sense of importance to whatever happens to be going on.

In terms of themes of the movie, they can be somewhat hard to discern during a viewing simply because the events of the movie are just so overwhelming. But thinking about it afterwards, I find the movie to be a sort of deconstruction of the punk livelihood. From the fact that they want to party in a cemetery and their leader’s name being Suicide, it is clear that the punks deify and fetishize death. Trash’s fantasy of being torn apart and devoured by old men is sexually exciting enough to get her to dance naked on top of a grave stone. But when confronted with actual death, and people even beyond death, they realize that their attempts to existentially conquer death by embracing it do them no good when put to the flame. We see that Ernie, the mortician, may be the most prepared due to his familiarity with cadavers, but in reality none of us are prepared to face the realities of death. In the infamous scene in which the characters interrogate one of the zombies, when pressed as to why they want to eat brains, she informs them that it helps with “the pain of being dead”. According to this movie, pain does not even stop at death. Apparently when a person dies, they enter a state of pain that can only be satiated by eating human brains. The fact that this doesn’t exactly track logically is something that I love; death will always be impossible to fully understand or comprehend, even with testimony from a dead person.

The Return of the Living Dead is easily in my top five films of all time, due to its massively impressive production value, economical direction, and insanely lovable characters and music. It’s so re-watchable that the credits are run over some of the best scenes of the movie. It knows right away that you’ll want to rewatch it and saves you the trouble of rewinding. There’s no possible way to watch this film and not have the time of your life.

[saucymorps]

Betrayal and Redemption Part 12

@hymnsroleplayfun

It had been two months since that incident and Sam could honestly say it had been the happiest two months of his life. Sure they still had to hunt that wasn’t going to change but at least this time he truly had a home to come back to. He had been talking to Dean, not that he needed his brothers permission, but he was his only other family, he wanted to make things as official as he could with Leana. Leana and Sam seemed to alternate their time between the Bunker and her place, and he was more than happy to share his other home with her. Her memory about the things she read in the library had more than saved their skin on a few occasions. Bonus is they usually had it to themselves and that usually meant pants optional. Now he was trying to think of a way to ask her to marry him, asking his brother if he had any ideas. Sam had been looking at rings, trying to do it the non illegal way was a bit of a challenge he was finding the rings were either too small or just quality was not what he wanted for Leana. Every town they stopped in he did try to look around and see what he could find. Morgan had been extremely helpful too, he approached her in trying to get some help and finally started to get to know his brothers girlfriend better. She was a big help getting him a bit of an idea of what style Leana liked and a ring size all without Leana suspecting a thing. Sam came out of yet another store, it wasnt like he couldnt spend the money on something expensive he just didnt want to do it with someone elses money, it was kinda a pride thing now. “Seriously I may need to run a trip to a big city to look for something these smaller ones dont have anything im looking for,” Sam said getting back into the car with Dean. They were on a salt and burn finishing it up and getting outta town, but Sam had wanted to stop and just check. He struck out but at least tonight he would be home with her and not sharing a room with his brother for the fifth night, he shot her a small text saying they were on their way home.  

Morgan had been doing better since everything happened. Work was a big help, it was almost her therapy I mean working with animals all day specially now when it was puppy and kitten season did help. When Dean was away she did tend to take more hours she just liked being busy, but when he was home it wasnt abnormal for her to spend most of the days with him. Leana and her were on good terms again, Morgan certainly got her ear full when they could finally be around each other but she didnt mind she had her best friend back. They grew closer too after an experience like that, so when Sam asked if she could help him plan a few things Morgan was more than happy to help. Dean and her were better too, now most of her fears of him leaving were gone. Most anyways, Dean was Dean she knew he wouldnt always tell her everything but she still worried one hunt gone wrong he wouldn’t be back. Still she was more than happy where they were she now felt comfortable talking about him at work and to her parents….and all involed wanted to meet him. Morgan was able to hold off on most of them, not that she wouldn’t be proud to show Dean off she just didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable…specially her parents. She didn’t even know if he had meet anyone’s parents and she didn’t want to scare him either. She knew he really had commitment issues so baby steps she could try skype first then go from there. Was kinda the same with the Bunker…since that day she hadnt set foot back in it either just wanted to forget everything that happened. Which is where she was now in her office doing paperwork her staff leaving over an hour ago but this was the best time to do it as she was still playing catch up from being gone for as long as she was. Her nerves had been getting the better of her, things lately at work had been more stressful than usual and left her completely exhausted when she got home and days off.  Wasn't that abnormal for her to lay around all day and sleep. Things were different but didnt feel like a bad different.

[tavi-hayes]

side fic three ~ lost and found

((hello, i present to you another side fic. i apologize in advance for the quality of this. i had written out almost all the rp on tuesday and i was quite content with the result (which never happens, my writing makes me cringe) but then when i switched my laptop on yesterday, the document hadn’t saved and all was gone, so i had to start all over again and i couldn’t remember what i had written and urgh... i just hope this fic is doing some justice to the rp which was so nice thank you anna @hugo-stanton​! anyhow if you decide to read this then enjoy, and maybe ignore all spelling/grammar mistakes. also there are some mentions here of the wonderful rps with itzel, brooke and leana but i still need to write them out i’m sorry))

“What is your photography project about exactly? I know it has something to do with the selection but...” I let my voice trail off a bit, I honestly don’t have any clue what the reason for the photos could be.

A couple of nights ago I was hanging out with Brooke. When I told her I found a friend in Hugo, she began to question his entire existence. Her sceptical attitude made me doubt myself, was he real or a product of my imagination? But when I showed up to dinner the next day, myself still being extremely hungover, my suspicions were confirmed. Hugo was there too, he was real. Thank god, I wasn’t going crazy after all.

He had knocked on my door a good 10 minutes ago, ready to show me some interesting places in this gigantic palace. During the photography thing I had asked if he could show me around. Perhaps it had been a bit bold to ask, but I was just sick of getting lost all the time. I hadn’t expected him to remember the promise of a tour. But here we are, walking in some hallway towards a destination still unknown to me.

My question makes Hugo chuckle a little, “people keep asking me that. But I guess it’s just that this is such a historical moment and at the end of this we’ll welcome someone new into our family.” There is a little silence before he continues speaking, “Arin isn’t the biggest fan of people having such an intimate view of his life. But what I’m doing is really just going to stay in our family.”

“Hm,” I nod my head. I can definitely see why the prince would feel that way. It must be annoying to have an entire country looking at you and judging every move you make. “So it's more like a memory kind of thing?”

“In a way yeah. Hopefully it can be something for Arin to appreciate. But if not then at least I enjoyed myself and made some new friends.”

“I'm sure he will appreciate it, if only for the effort you put into it.” I glance around the hallway, I don’t recognize anything here. Have I even been here before? “Good for you for making friends.”

That makes him chuckle again. “I'm enjoying it so far for sure. It's nice having someone here who has the time to talk to me.”

“Well I'm glad to hear you've found that person.” We’ve reached the end of the hall. There is a set of gigantic double doors in front of us, I don’t think I’ve ever seen them before. Or maybe I have and I just don’t remember.

Hugo points towards the doors, “that's the gallery- we can go in or skip it if you like.”

I nod my head, trying to see if I remember the way we’ve walked to get here. “You don't like the gallery?”

“Oh, it's fine! I just don't know if you're into art.”

“Let’s continue,” I look away from the doors and glance at Hugo instead, “I can always come back another time.”

“Alright,” he turns and motions to some other doors. “These are all empty rooms- there's a lot of those.”

I don’t quite understand the look he’s giving me. There is a hint of embarrassment on his face, “hm, so it's a matter of too many rooms, and not enough stuff to put into them?”

“Or just too many rooms.”

I nod my head as if I understand, but it sounds like a rich people problem to me. The strange expression is still visible on his face, “why that face?”

He shrugs, “I guess maybe I'm just not into the massive home with the servants and everything.”

“Oh I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ...” I clear my throat softly, unsure of how to continue that sentence. “So I'm guessing you don't have a palace of your own?”

His laughter fills the hallway, “I have an apartment- but if you squint enough I guess you can pretend it looks like a palace.”

“And your ‘servants’ probably listen very well to all your needs,” I raise my hands to place some air quotes around servants.

Hugo nods his head, “oh, yes. My manservant is very attentive. Although,” he leans a little closer as if he is going to let me in on a secret. “Between you and I he really could be more neat and better at staying organized. ”

That makes me laugh, “hm maybe you can just tell him? Or does he not take criticism very well?”

“I'm not sure, I've never tried to tell him off too much.” He chuckles a little more as we walk past the doors in this hallway. I can’t help but think about the empty rooms behind them. There’s so many of them, it’s quite sad.

“You know him best of course, just don't be too hard on him, okay?”

“I'll try- but I make no promises.” We reach the end of another corridor. “Okay, so that over there leads to the lower level but there's not too much down there from what I remember.” I look towards the direction he’s pointing in. “But over this way is the music room if you want to go there.”

I glance from one direction to the other, “the music room sounds perfect to me.” I’ve had some nice moments in the music room lately. First Leana and I had a great chat in there. It had made me realize I had been wrong for judging her based on her profession. And more recently Itzel entered the room when I had been playing some guitar. Even though that had been the first time we properly met, I think of her as a friend already. “But you're the tour guide, so it's really your call.”

“Well, you let me take all those photos so I think you've more than earned your say.” A smile appears on his face. “But if you want to go then let's go.”

I have to increase my pace to keep up with him. Why do tall people walk this fast? “Pfft, you were putting all the effort in and taking photos, while all I did was do nothing besides talking to you. Which I quite enjoyed actually, the talking part I mean,” I say, realizing I’m just rambling and it probably doesn’t make that much sense.

“You were patient though. Not everyone can do that.”

I don’t really know what to say to that, his kindness makes me smile. “What's your favourite place in the palace?”

Apparently that’s a hard question because Hugo is silent for another moment. It’s not that difficult for me to pick one favourite place: the music room. But then again there are only a couple of rooms that I frequently visit. And I’ve only been here for a couple of months.

“Promise me you won't laugh?”

I place my right hand right on top of my heart, “I promise I won't laugh.” Unless his answer is going to be extremely ridiculous, like the bathroom or something. But I refrain from saying that.

“Okay,” he says as he’s nodding his head. “It's the stairs.”

Now that is not the answer I was expecting at all, “you may need to explain that.”

“They're just calm- usually. But also they're a good place to see everything that's going on. Also, if you're feeling really brave you can slide down the bannister.”

I can’t stop myself from laughing. There are so many different ways how that can go wrong. “Have you ever done that before? Slide down the bannister?”

Hugo glances around before nodding his head, “I have, yeah.”

My eyebrows raise in curiosity. “How did that go? Did you land on your feet?”

There is a grin on his face. “Yeah, I did.”

“Hm,” I smirk, “I don't think I'll be able to believe you until I've seen some proof of that.”

“Well, only if you're willing to try it out yourself.” He walks over to a door and opens it.

I suddenly realize we’ve reached the music room, I’ve been so distracted by talking with him that I hadn’t noticed. But indeed, there is the weird painting of some creepy male person. The painting was a great orientation point, indicating which door lead to the music room.

“Deal,” I say before walking into the music room, mumbling a thank you to Hugo for holding the door open for me.

It looks exactly the same as the last time I’ve been here. It’s like no one, besides me, uses this room. But I know that’s not true, Leana had been playing her guitar in here not that long before today. Still, it looks abandoned.

“Have you been in here before?”

I hear the door fall shut behind me and turn around, nodding my head. “Yeah I have actually, this is such a great place to be. It's hard to stay away.” The acoustics in this room are close to perfect, of course I would come here all the time.

“You're still practicing then?”

“Yes of course, there are always new things to learn.” I smile a little, “would you like to hear some?”

Hugo nods in return, “I'd love to. If you're willing.”

“Of course.” If there ever comes a day that I’m not willing to play music, someone should probably take me to a doctor or something. I walk over to one of the guitars and pick it up. Normally I would practice on my own bass guitar, but with this tour going on I hadn’t thought about bringing it along with me. I take the guitar with me to one of the sofas and sit down, “any requests?”

He thinks for a moment before saying, “a song you love.”

Hm, that is not a good question to ask someone who loves music as much as I do. “A song I love,” there are so many song titles coming to mind. But after a second I know which one to play. To check if this guitar is even tuned, I play some chords. “Let me just…” my voice trails off as I start loosening and tightening some machine heads. I play a low E2 and a high E4, but it’s still slightly out of tune. I repeat the actions until I’m content with the result. When I look up I find Hugo smiling at me, “ready?”

He nods his head, “ready.”

I’m still watching him as he sits down on the floor a little away from me, the sight of him makes me smile. I shift slightly so I’m a bit more comfortable on the sofa and put my fingers in the right positions. I start playing Under the Bridge by Red Hot Chili Peppers, a song I know by heart. My fingers find the strings automatically, making no mistakes. When I’m done I look back at Hugo again, “tada!” I played the exact same song for Leana the other day and her reaction was nothing but positive. I can’t wait to find out what Hugo thinks.

“Tavi, that was amazing.” He stands up and starts clapping his hands.

There is a bit of an echo in this room, so it actually sounds like at least a dozen people are applauding. I can feel my face heat a little, a smile spreading across my face. “Oh stop, it was nothing.”

He shakes his head as he walks towards me, “it was beautiful.”

His eyes are on the guitar in my hands, my eyes are on him. “I'm glad you think that, thank you.”

I’m still looking at his face when his gaze shifts, meeting mine. “What made you pick it?”

“The song?” The movement of his hand catches my attention and I look down just in time to see him reaching towards the guitar. “I just think it's one of the best songs in the entire history of music.”

“I mean the guitar.” He runs a finger along the neck of the guitar. For some reason that specific action feels strangely intimate to me.

A shiver runs down my spine. “Oh,” I focus back on his face again, “the first instrument I got my hands on when I was a kid, was a guitar. It was like love at first sight.”

Hugo nods his head, “I can tell. I mean how much practice and time you've put in.”

He makes me smile again, “and it was definitely worth all the time and energy.” And by that I mean 15 years of practicing almost every day.

A smile appears on his face as well. “It really was. You're very talented.”

“Oh shush,” I can feel my cheeks heat again. I can’t handle all these kind words. “Do you play any music instruments?”

“I used to play violin but I stopped a long time ago.” The smile has disappeared, now there is a frown on his face.

“The violin is such a beautiful instrument,” both my mom and my brother mastered that skill. I wish I could hear them play again. “Why did you stop?”

He looks at me for a moment without saying anything, before swallowing once. “My mom was the one who kept me going and once she was gone it just didn't have the same appeal.” His eyes meet mine for a moment longer, before his gaze goes back to the guitar.

“Oh Hugo,” I don’t even know what I’m doing but before I know it I reach for his hand. His skin feels very soft, especially compared to my own calloused fingers, the result of playing string instruments for so long. “I'm so sorry.”

“It’s okay. It was a long time ago.”

“But that doesn't mean it's nothing.” I’m debating whether or not to ask what happened. I know how annoying it can be when someone sticks their nose in other people’s business that doesn’t concern them.

“It’s not, but it also isn’t a big deal.” He shrugs, “I don’t mind talking about it. It just usually makes people uncomfortable.”

I suddenly realize the awkwardness of the position we’re in. He’s standing while I’m sitting, not the nicest way to have a conversation. I let go of his hand and scoot over on the sofa, carefully placing the guitar on the floor so that it is sort of leaning against the sofa. There is now a place for him to sit if he would want to. “You wanna talk about it?”

“There isn’t too much left to talk about but sure.” He sits down beside me.

I turn to sit sideways so I can actually face him, “what happened?” So far for not sticking my nose in other people’s business.

“My mom left when I was a kid and I haven’t seen her since. I’m not sure it’s as exciting as you thought it’d be.”

“Oh,” I manage to get out, simply because I wasn’t looking for an exciting story whatsoever. If there is someone who knows what it’s like to have one parent leave your life, it’s me. I don’t know what’s worse, having a parent walk out of your life deliberately or have a parent ripped away from you. Both situations suck. “And she never reached out to you?”

“I think she might have sent a birthday card a few years ago but other than that there’s nothing that I remember.” Hugo shrugs.

I can’t stop looking at his face. “I'm sorry that happened,” I say, unconsciously twirling a curl around my finger.

“Don't be. It's not your fault. And anyway, I have my dad and my family here so it's not like I have too much time to dwell on it.” I can see his gaze shifting slightly, making me aware of what I’m doing with my hair. “What are your parents like?”

I don’t know what kind of an expression I had on my face, but it disappears as quickly as the sad feelings resurface. “Uhm,” I bring my hand away from my hair, scratching the skin around my collarbone instead. “My parents.” There are a billion ways to get that message across, each with their own amount of details. “They're kind people and we're very close.” I close my eyes, I’m debating which strategy to use. I decide to go for the ripping-off-the-bandaid one. “My dad is in prison and my mom has not been the same since he got arrested.” I open my eyes again and find my hands clasped together in my lap.

“Oh, Tavi, I'm so sorry. That must be really difficult.” His hand reaches for mine. I don’t feel his hand on my skin, my feelings are a bit too busy trying to drown me on the inside. But I do see his hand, now covering mine. “We don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. But if you do... I'm here for you.”

I force a smile to my face, but it doesn’t stay there. “Thanks, that is very kind of you.” I clasp my hands together more tightly to stop them from shaking. “I just wish I could find a way to help him.”

“Can I ask what happened?”

Maybe it’s the concern in his voice or maybe I just want him to get to know the real me, but I urge myself to start talking. “My dad got called in as a witness for a different court hearing.” The memories of that day all come back to mind. “But then when that was over, and we were about to leave,” I have to pause for a minute to calm myself down, “when the judge called out to him, saying he was accused of murder.” I swallow to get the lump in my throat to go away. “And the judge just gave his verdict, and he got arrested.”

“I'm so sorry, Tavi. That doesn't sound right.”

“It's not,” I shake my head a little. “That's why I applied to this selection,” I make myself look at him again, “to see if I could find a way to give my dad his freedom back.”

“Have you talked to Arin? He might be able to help.”

“He knows about the jail situation and my dad's sentence.” There is so much sadness in Hugo’s eyes and I can’t handle that right now, so I focus back on my hands again. “Do you think he would want to help me?” I honestly doubt it. We hadn’t spoken since that god-awful date, when I had tried to shoot him with a paintball gun.

“I'm sure he'd want to.” Hugo stays silent for a moment. “But sometimes he can't. They sort of keep him on a tight leash.”

“I can imagine,” I say, nodding my head. And besides, the prince is in the middle of a selection, while keeping the country running. I doubt he would have the time or energy to help another charity case. What would he even do? My eyes find Hugo’s again, “but thank you, I'll talk to him.”

His voice is a bit more quiet this time, “how long has it been since you've seen him?”

“6 years,” I have to swallow again. I can’t start crying now, what must Hugo think of me?

His face falls, “that's not fair at all. You should get to see him, Tavi. Especially if he wants to see you.”

I can’t even begin to imagine what I look like right now. “He's being held in a prison in St. George, so it's not exactly around the corner. And we have been saving money to go visit him ever since his arrest, but it never was enough.”

A dash of confusion spreads across his face. “Why is he all the way in St. George?”

“I don’t know.” I shrug. It has never made any sense to me, Denbeigh had a maximum security prison of its own. But no, my dad had to be shipped off to another province. “It's what the judge stated in his verdict.”

“What about lawyers? What did they say?”

“The ones we could afford, didn't want to help us.” Some lawyers had tried to explain why they couldn’t help us, but others hadn’t even allowed us to enter their building. “They said it was a losing game, and that being associated with us would not be good for their reputation.”

“That's not right at all. They should be ashamed.”

“They should,” I press my lips together. I don’t understand the point of lawyers if they don’t want to get their hands dirty. “But there's nothing to do about that.”

Hugo shakes his head. “There has to be. There's always a way.”

It’s that exact thought that has kept me going all these years, I can’t let my dad rot away behind bars. I try to smile, “I'd like to think that, yes.”

He nods his head now. “There is. And I believe it can be found. You were Selected after all. Isn't that a sign?”

“Yeah maybe,” I thought getting access to the palace library would be the key to solve all my problems. But as it turns out, life is never easy. And I still hadn’t found anything that could possibly help my dad.

I’m done feeling like Debbie Downer and pulling Hugo into my bubble of sadness and despair, so I decide to change the topic. “Don't take this the wrong way, but I don't think being a tour guide is your calling.”

The sound of Hugo’s laughter makes my sad feelings go away. “Is this a bad time to tell you that I only invited you to do this because I'm starting a tour guide business and I need a 5 star Yowl review?”

I can still see the concern in his eyes, but I’m glad for the change to a lighter topic. “Aha,” I even have to chuckle, “and here I was thinking we were friends. You just need me to do something.”

“I’m sorry you had to find out this way. I hope you don’t think badly of me.”

“Hm,” I pat his hand twice before getting up from the sofa. I pick up the guitar. “I can't promise a 5-star review now.”

“I can’t believe you just ruined my dreams. We had a deal, Tavi.”

I carry the guitar back to where I got it from and place it onto its stand. “I don't remember making a deal.” I shrug and turn around to face Hugo again, “I'm sorry, for me it's honesty above all else.”

There is a long and dramatic sigh. “Honesty? Even if it breaks my heart?”

It take all of my willpower not to burst into laughter. Instead I gasp, “would you prefer me to lie to your future customers?”

“Isn’t that what a friend would do?”

“Okay,” it takes me a second to come up with the perfect review. “’best tour I've been on in my entire life: the tour takes you to a lot of interesting places, the tour guide himself is very friendly and helpful, you get all the information you could possibly want and more. Easily 5 stars!’” I raise my eyebrows, “how does that sound?”

That makes him chuckle. “You left out the best part. ‘At the end he lets you slide down the bannisters.’”

“Oh right, how can I forget that?”

He shakes his head in disbelief. “I can't believe you didn't remember.”

“I'm sorry okay.” I pull the corners of my lips down to create an extremely sad face. “Can you ever forgive me?”

Another dramatic sigh. “Only because you said you're sorry.” His eyes go to the door. “So- should we continue on or do you want to go straight to me beating you at a race down the bannisters?”

Excuse me? I raise my eyebrows in surprise, “you beating me? We'll see about that.” I flip my hair over my shoulder, “let's go to the bannisters then.”

I can’t quite figure out the look he’s given me, but there is definitely excitement in his eyes. “You're on then. Let's go.”

Before I know it, we’re standing in the entrance hall again with the big staircase leading upwards in front of us. It looks 10 times steeper than all the other times I’ve been here.

“Okay, are you ready? To lose I mean.”

This guy. I poke him with my elbow in response. “You shouldn't say that so often, you might start believing you actually have a chance at winning.”

“I think I know I'll win.” Hugo has a confident smile on his face.

“Of course you do.” Meanwhile, I begin to wonder if I have a death wish or something. I don’t see how this is going to end well for me, especially because I have zero experience. “What will the winner get? What's the prize?”

There is a moment of silence, but then a grin appears on his face. “The loser has to play a song on the guitar?”

I don’t see how that is such a bad thing for me. Either I have to play the guitar again or Hugo will play a song for me. It’s a win-win really. But still I want to beat him of course, if only so I can keep reminding him of it. “Okay fine, deal?” I extend my hand for him to shake.

He shakes my hand. “Boy, I really hope I win now. I can’t play the guitar at all.”

I laugh, “I would love to see that.” I turn to face the stairs again, “do you wanna go first?”

Hugo chuckles in response, “this is a together or not at all thing.” He points to the bannister on the right side. “You take that one and I’ll take the other?”

I nod my head, “okay fine.” I turn back to look at him one final time, “good luck.”

“Thanks, you too.” And with that we start walking up the stairs.

I’m about halfway up when I decide it’s a good moment to turn around and look back down. I’ve never really noticed how far down the floor is. “All the way to the top?”

A chuckle reaches me from the other side of the steps, “all the way to the top.”

It feels like I’m climbing the Mount Everest, but eventually I make it to the top. I dare myself to look over the bannister. Yup there is the floor, all the way down there. If I lose my balance and fall, I have to make sure I fall to the left so the stairs will break my fall. If I fall to the right, the floor will break my bones.

I glance over at Hugo, he’s already in position and looking over at me. “You ready?”

No is what I want to say, but I swing my leg over the bannister instead. It’s a good thing I’m wearing some trousers today, doing this with a dress on would be impossible. When I feel as comfortable as I can be, given the circumstances, I call over, “yeah. You?”

“Yeah. Count to three?”

I nod my head. What am I even doing? “One? Two?”

“Three!”

I start to slide down very very slowly, but carefully. There are no disbalances yet so I allow myself to go a bit faster. This actually going pretty well. Maybe this is one of my undiscovered talents? But then I feel that I’m slightly leaning towards the right, the side with the floor. I hold on to the bannister for the life of me.

That actually helps and I let out a sigh of relief. I’m not dead yet.

I carefully slide onwards without any more troubles until the sliding stops completely, just a couple of steps away from the ground floor level. I jump down from the bannister, glad to have some solid ground under my feet again.

Then I hear a loud thud and I turn around. Someone did not land on his feet.

“I think I lost.”

I hurry to Hugo’s side, “are you okay? Are you in pain?”

He laughs, but I can’t decide if it’s a normal laugh or an omg-I-am-in-so-much-pain one. Maybe I should go get some help.

“I'm okay... I just need a second.” He takes a deep breath but then a frown appears on his face. “What's that?”

“Are you sure you're okay?” My eyebrows knit together in confusion. “What's what?”

“Over there.” I look over in the directions he’s pointing to. All I see is a little sofa, nothing else.

“Did you hit your head?”

Hugo shakes his head in return, “I don't think so.” At that he stands up and starts walking towards the sofa.

I truly wonder what it is he’s seeing. Has he gone delusional? I follow him just in case, perhaps he’s going to fall again. Not that I think I would be able to catch him if he does, but at least I will be nearby.

I watch him push the sofa aside before bending down and picking something up. Okay so he legit saw something, he’s not going crazy.

There is an amused smile on his face when he turns to show me what he has found. “It's an iPod.”

“Oh,” I move a little closer to get a better view. Could this be … ? No. Maybe. It looks like my iPod. But perhaps someone else owns the same one?

Hugo holds it out to me, “see. I wonder how on earth it got there.”

I can’t take my eyes off the silver device in his hand. My heartbeat increases slightly. “I think it might be mine?”

“Really? Wow.” He chuckles a little, “it's a good thing I fell then.”

“Definitely,” this might be one of the best days in my life. “Can I see it?”

“Of course! It's yours.” He holds the iPod out for me. I gladly take it and flip it over in my hand. The scratch on the logo is there, from when it had been in my bag together with my keys. And the little dent in the bottom right corner is present as well. My heartbeat increases even more.

To be 100% sure, I switch it on. It’s a miracle that the battery is still working. The title of the song and the name of the artists appear on the screen: Caspar Hayes & Jimmie Davis. This really is my iPod.

I clutch the little device close to my chest, I will never ever let go of it again. “Thank you! I thought it was lost for good.”

“So, then it looks like you really are the winner.”

I look up at Hugo to find him already looking at me with a huge smile on his face. I can’t help but smile myself, I haven’t felt this happy in a very long time. “And now you owe a song too. This is such a good day for me.”

He sucks in a breath, nodding his head. “I think after you hear me play you'll never want to see me again.”

I shake my head, the smile is still on my face when I’m looking at him. “I don't think I will ever think that.”

The tiniest hint of a blush appears on his cheeks, “really?”

“Yeah, I mean not everyone can be as talented as I am.”

That makes him laugh, “well, you're right. You're really talented.”

I shake my head a little, I was only joking. The smile remains where it is as I turn around to have another look towards the bannisters. “You didn't lose on purpose, did you?”

He shrugs, but his eyes meet mine. “I don't think I did.”

“Okay that's good to hear,” I notice the soft smile on his face. “Otherwise we'd have to do a rematch.”

Another one of his laughs echoes in the hall, it’s such a heart-warming sound. “I think after today I'm going into retirement.”

I can’t hold my own laugh back. “what a shame. The national bannister sliding team will miss its star.”

He shakes his head in return. “After that poor display of sportsmanship? I think they'd be thrilled to get rid of me.”

“One lost game doesn't define your entire career though.”

“Maybe not, but I'm glad that my last hurrah was witnessed by you- even if I fell.”

“I feel honoured.” I bring my hand up to tuck some hair behind my ear. “But are you sure you didn't hurt yourself?” I hadn’t seen the fall itself, but the thud was quite loud and the ground was unforgivingly solid.

He nods his head, “I promise I'm fine. The only thing injured is my is my unbroken winning streak at bannister races. So I think I'll live. And all in all you're not a bad person to lose to.”

I can’t stop myself from snorting, “wow thanks, what a great compliment.”

Last time he said my company was better than that of a garbage bag and now I wasn’t a bad person to lose to. Such considerate and kind words.

“Thank you, I really thought about that one for a long time.”

“I can tell,” I say with a smirk on my face. “Hey do you happen to know what time it is? My maids will scold me if I'm late for dinner preparations again.” Any other day I wouldn’t have cared for their mean words and angry glances, but I don’t want them to bring my mood down after the fun day I’ve had.

Hugo glances down at his watch, “it's 4:47. So there's just a bit over an hour until dinner.”

“Hmm,” I nod my head a little. According to Willa and Carla, they needed at least 50 minutes to make me look somewhat presentable for the royal family. Sigh. “Maybe I should head back to my room then?”

“Of course, I wouldn't want you to get in trouble.” He doesn’t look at me this time, his eyes are focussed on the floor instead. “Would it be okay if I walked you?”

The question surprises me, I’m perfectly capable of walking myself back to my room. And I know which way I have to go: just up the stairs and then to the left. It isn’t that difficult. But the sight of Hugo and the way he asked, I can’t help but smile. “Of course.”

“Then I guess I will lead the way- very carefully though. I think I've embarrassed myself enough for the day.” He offers his arm to me. It reminds me of my date with prince Arin. When he had offered me his arm, I hadn’t wanted to be anywhere near him, let alone touch him.

But this time, I don’t even have to think about it. I gently take his arm, “thank you.” I turn my face a bit so I can look up at him. “What are you talking about? Besides the bannister thing, when did you embarrass yourself?”

“It was mostly that.” He blushes a little bit, but it’s just enough for me to notice it.

I pat his arm a couple of times, hoping to take some of that embarrassment away. I truly don’t think the fall had been that humiliating. “Don't worry about it, that could have happened to anyone.”

When he looks over at me, I suddenly realize I have been staring at his face the entire time. “Hey, Tavi?”

I like the way he says my name. “Yeah?”

“Thank you for doing this with me. I had a lot of fun.” His gaze shifts to the steps, his voice going a bit more quiet, “maybe we can do it again some time?”

The smile on my face keeps growing bigger and bigger. “I would love that.”

His eyes meet mine again, there is a big smile on his face as well. “Okay. Then it's a date.”

My pulse quickens. Did I hear that correctly?

I raise my eyebrows, “a date?”

His face flushes even more now. “As friends I mean. Friends of course.” Hugo’s eyes dart away from mine.

Friends.

Any hope I might have had is immediately crushed by his words.

How can I even think about anything more than friendship?

“Oh,” I have completely misinterpreted the situation. I feel so dumb. “Friends of course.”

I can’t help but feel a little disappointed. But I don’t want Hugo to see any of that in my eyes. As I focus on the wall in front of me, I suddenly realize we’ve already reached the top of the stairs. How did I manage to get up here without paying any attention to the steps?

He must have noticed the disappointment. “We can do whatever you want and I can play my awful song for you.”

Now that I think of it, a friendship with Hugo might be for the best anyway. Today has been one of the nicest days I’ve had here in the palace.

The promise of some music makes me smile again, “yeah sure, that should be interesting.”

“So we have a plan.” There is a short silence before he continues speaking. “I don't actually know which room is yours.” And then he just starts laughing.

I don’t know what to make of this. “Didn't you come to my room before this tour?” I say as I let go of his arm. “Anyway it's the first one on the left here.”

“Yeah, I should have memorized the room number but I think I was a bit distracted by you.”

“Distracted by me?” I don’t remember doing anything that could have distracted him. I’ve reached my door now, but when I place my hand on the doorknob I turn around to face him one more time.

He shakes his head, “I just mean it’s nice talking to you so I wasn’t really paying to where your room is.”

“Oh okay,” I nod my head. “Anyway thanks for today, it was fun.” I smile again.

Hugo returns the smile. “Of course. Any time. Though I think I should consider what you said... I didn’t show you around much for supposedly being your tour guide.”

That is definitely true. We had only been to the music room and I had already known what it looked like. And let’s not forget the stairs, that was a whole different experience. It didn’t even matter, it had been a fun day. “It's okay. Though a 5-star review,” I say as I crunch my face, “I'm not sure.”

I push the door leading to my bedroom open, but the sound of Hugo chuckling makes me turn around again. “There’s always next time I guess. I’m sure my awful guitar playing will automatically make the experience 5 stars.”

“Don't you dare think you can bribe me with music.” I narrow my eyes at him, trying to stay serious. But I fail miserably, I can’t stop the laughter from coming out.

There is a smile on his face again. “I'll find something else to bribe you with.” His gaze shifts to my door, “see you at dinner?”

“Yes,” I nod my head before I turn around. I push my door open a bit more so I can actually walk into my room. Before I close it, I smile at him one more time, “bye.”

He returns the smile, “bye.”

I close the door behind me. A quick scan of the room tells me my maids haven't arrived yet. Good. This gives me a little bit of time to get my head in the right place before I have to face other people again.

I sit down on the floor with my back towards the door. On the other side I hear the sound of retreating footsteps echoing in the hallway. I pull up my legs and lean my elbows on top of them.

Friendship. I need to keep that in mind.

Holy freaking shit.

[sherristockman]

Chasing the Dragon — America’s Struggle With Opioid Addiction Dr. Mercola By Dr. Mercola If you or someone you know is hooked on prescription drugs such as Oxycontin and Vicodin, or street drugs like heroin, you'll connect with "Chasing the Dragon," a raw 2016 documentary about the horrors of drug addiction. Produced by the U.S. Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), the film features ordinary Americans sharing personal stories of danger and destruction that characterized their lives prior to recovery from hard-core drug addiction. Because the documentary is filled with harsh language and disturbing images, parental discretion is advised. In 2015, 52,404 Americans died from drug overdoses; 33,091 of them involved an opioid and nearly one third of them, 15,281, were by prescription.1,2,3 Meanwhile, kidney disease, listed as the 9th leading cause of death on the CDC's top 10 list, killed 48,146.4 The CDC does not include drug overdoses on this list, but if you did, drug overdoses (63 percent of which are opioids), would replace kidney disease as the 9th leading cause of death as of 2015. Many of those featured in "Chasing the Dragon" are regular people from good homes and loving families. The one characteristic they had in common while using was a feeling of powerlessness to escape the spiraling cycle of drug use and abuse that dominated every moment of their lives. One recovering addict, a woman named Melissa, had this to say about her drug use: "It became my full-time job. The needle was my boss — a very demanding boss." To prevent you or someone you love from becoming addicted to prescription painkillers, I'd like to take a closer look at opioid abuse and offer several healthy alternatives to help you manage pain. How Bad Is Prescription Drug Abuse in the US? A 2015 study5 suggested 1 in 4 Americans who use opioid painkillers become addicted to them. Despite the drugs' high risk of addiction, a 2016 NPR health poll6 indicated less than one-third of people said they questioned or refused their doctor's prescription for opioids. Dr. Leana Wen, emergency physician and health commissioner for the city of Baltimore, recommends you discuss with your doctor any concerns you may have about receiving a prescription for narcotics. Due to their highly addictive potential, it's important, she says, to ensure such drugs are your best and only option:7 "Ask why. Often other alternatives, like not [taking] anything at all, taking an ibuprofen or Tylenol, physical therapy or something else can be effective. Asking 'why' is something every patient and provider should do." Wen's concerns are well placed. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC),8 2 million Americans abused or were dependent on opioids in 2014. On average, more than 1,000 of them land in emergency rooms every day as the result of abuse or misuse of prescription painkillers. "There's very little difference between oxycodone, morphine and heroin," says Dr. Deeni Bassam, board-certified anesthesiologist, pain specialist and medical director of the Virginia-based Spine Care Center. "It's just that one comes in a prescription bottle and another one comes in a plastic bag."9 Bassam, whose views on drug addiction are presented throughout "Chasing the Dragon," believes most drug dependency starts innocuously:10 "A friend offers you something at a party or at home. Or you're having a bad day, and you need something to pick you up, so somebody hands you a pill and says, 'Here, this will help you feel better.' That's how this problem always starts." Deborah Taylor, senior vice president and executive director of Phoenix House Mid-Atlantic, a nonprofit drug and alcohol rehabilitation organization operating in 10 U.S. states, notes:11 "The progression of addiction and the behavior that comes with it is pretty standard regardless of where you're born, how much money you have, how old you are and your race or nationality. You can be the smartest person in the world — and the minute that chemical hits your bloodstream, you lose control of what it does in your body. You can't control it. Nobody can control it. I don't care who you are. It's not controllable." From Prescription Opioids to Street Drugs The transition from prescription opioids to street drugs like heroin is a relatively easy one. When a prescription runs out, the cost to renew it becomes unmanageable or a physician refuses to renew a prescription, many addicts look for other options. Heroin, which is often cheaper and easier to obtain than opioids, is a popular alternative. Chemically, the drugs are very similar and provide a similar kind of high. Without additives, heroin is as dangerous as Oxycontin and equally addictive. However, when dealers cut heroin with other drugs, the results can be deadly. According to the Chicago Tribune,12 in just six days during August 2016, a staggering 174 heroin overdoses took place in Cincinnati, Ohio, a city that records, on average, 20 to 25 overdoses a week. The Tribune13 claims the unprecedented number of overdoses was precipitated by heroin cut with carfentanil, a drug originally developed as a tranquilizer for large animals such as elephants. Cut into heroin, it was meant to deliver a stronger and more extended high, which would presumably keep users coming back to buy more. Instead, it resulted in a string of overdoses and deaths that left law enforcement begging local citizens to not buy heroin until the ultra-potent batch was off the streets. Their advice made sense considering carfentanil is 10,000 to 100,000 times stronger than morphine. About the overdoses, Newtown police chief Tom Synan, who is also leader of the law enforcement task force for the Hamilton County Heroin Coalition, said:14 "[Dealers] are intentionally putting in drugs they know can kill someone. The benefit for them is if the user survives it is such a powerful high for them, they tend to come back … If one or two people die, they could care less. They know the supply is so big right now that if you lose some customers, in their eyes there's always more in line." Treating Your Pain Without Drugs Prior to leaving office in January 2017, U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) commissioner Dr. Robert Califf addressed the devastating effects of opioid misuse, suggesting it's time to find better ways to treat pain:15 "The public-health crisis of opioid misuse, addiction and overdose is one of the most challenging issues [the FDA] has faced during my time as commissioner. Solving this issue is critical to our future. It's time to put more resources into the development of non-opioid, non-addictive medications to help people who are in serious, debilitating pain. We need more research to define the most effective non-medication approaches to pain, and how to deliver them …" Califf is right; we do need better ways to manage pain. Fortunately, many natural alternatives already exist. While not everyone who takes a prescription opioid will wind up an addict, the risk is real. For that reason, I strongly recommend exhausting the many natural alternatives before you resort to an opioid pain reliever. The health risks associated with those drugs are great, and addiction and overdose happen far more often than you may realize. It's particularly important for you to avoid opioids when trying to address long-term chronic pain, as your body will create a tolerance to the drug. Over time, you'll require greater doses at more frequent intervals to achieve the same pain relief. This is a recipe for disaster and could have lethal consequences. Please don't risk it! Due to the many concerns around addiction and tolerance, opioids clearly have not lived up to the promises manufacturers have made. With so much focus on pharmaceutical remedies, you may not be aware of the many healthy alternatives to pain relief. Following is information about non-drug remedies, dietary changes and bodywork interventions that can help you manage your pain. Non-Drug Remedies for Pain Relief If you have chronic pain of any kind, please understand there are many natural, safe and effective alternatives to prescription and over-the-counter painkillers, including: ✓ Kratom Kratom (Mitragyna speciose) is another plant remedy that has become a popular opioid substitute.16 In August, the DEA issued a notice saying it was planning to ban kratom, listing it as Schedule 1 controlled substance. However, following massive outrage from kratom users who say opioids are their only alternative, the agency reversed its decision.17 Kratom is likely safer than an opioid for someone in serious and chronic pain. However, it's important to recognize that it is a psychoactive substance and should not be used carelessly. There's very little research showing how to use it safely and effectively, and it may have a very different effect from one person to the next. Also, while it may be useful for weaning people off opioids, kratom is in itself addictive. So, while it appears to be a far safer alternative to opioids, it's still a powerful and potentially addictive substance. So please, do your own research before trying it. ✓ Low-Dose Naltrexone (LDN) Naltrexone is an opiate antagonist, originally developed in the early 1960s for the treatment of opioid addiction. When taken at very low doses (LDN, available only by prescription), it triggers endorphin production, which can boost your immune function and ease pain. ✓ Curcumin: A primary therapeutic compound identified in the spice turmeric, curcumin has been shown in more than 50 clinical studies to have potent anti-inflammatory activity. Curcumin is hard to absorb, so best results are achieved with preparations designed to improve absorption. It is very safe and you can take two to three every hour if you need to. ✓ Astaxanthin: One of the most effective oil-soluble antioxidants known, astaxanthin has very potent anti-inflammatory properties. Higher doses are typically required for pain relief, and you may need 8 milligrams or more per day to achieve results. ✓ Boswellia: Also known as boswellin or "Indian frankincense," this herb contains powerful anti-inflammatory properties, which have been prized for thousands of years. This is one of my personal favorites, as it worked well for many of my former rheumatoid arthritis patients. ✓ Bromelain: This protein-digesting enzyme, found in pineapples, is a natural anti-inflammatory. It can be taken in supplement form, but eating fresh pineapple may also be helpful. Keep in mind most of the bromelain is found within the core of the pineapple, so consider eating some of the pulpy core when you consume the fruit. ✓ Cayenne cream: Also called capsaicin cream, this spice comes from dried hot peppers. It alleviates pain by depleting your body's supply of substance P, a chemical component of nerve cells that transmit pain signals to your brain. ✓ Cetyl myristoleate (CMO): This oil, found in dairy butter and fish, acts as a joint lubricant and anti-inflammatory. I have used a topical preparation of CMO to relieve ganglion cysts and a mild case of carpal tunnel syndrome. ✓ Evening primrose, black currant and borage oils: These oils contain the fatty acid gamma-linolenic acid, which is useful for treating arthritic pain. ✓ Ginger: This herb is anti-inflammatory and offers pain relief and stomach-settling properties. Fresh ginger works well steeped in boiling water as a tea, or incorporated into fresh vegetable juice. Dietary Changes to Fight Inflammation and Manage Your Pain Unfortunately, physicians often fall short when attempting to effectively treat chronic pain, resorting to the only treatment they know: prescription drugs. While these drugs may bring some temporary relief, they will do nothing to resolve the underlying causes of your pain. If you suffer from chronic pain, making the following changes to your diet may bring you some relief. ✓ Consume more animal-based omega-3 fats. Similar to the effects of anti-inflammatory pharmaceutical drugs, omega-3 fats from fish and fish oils work to directly or indirectly modulate a number of cellular activities associated with inflammation. While drugs have a powerful ability to inhibit your body's pain signals, omega-3s cause a gentle shift in cell signaling to bring about a lessened reactivity to pain. Eating healthy seafood like anchovies or sardines, which are low in environmental toxins, or taking a high-quality supplement such as krill oil are your best options for obtaining omega-3s. DHA and EPA, the omega-3 oils contained in krill oil, have been found in many animal and clinical studies to have anti-inflammatory properties, which are beneficial for pain relief. ✓ Radically reduce your intake of processed foods. Processed foods not only contain chemical additives and excessive amounts of sugar, but also are loaded with damaging omega-6 fats. By eating these foods, especially fried foods, you upset your body's ratio of omega-3 to omega-6 fatty-acids, which triggers inflammation. Inflammation is a key factor in most pain. ✓ Eliminate or radically reduce your consumption of grains and sugars. Avoiding grains and sugars, especially fructose, will lower your insulin and leptin levels. Elevated insulin and leptin levels are one of the most profound stimulators of inflammatory prostaglandin production, which contributes to pain. While healthy individuals are advised to keep their daily fructose consumption below 25 grams from all sources, you'll want to limit your intake to 15 grams per day until your pain is reduced. Eating sugar increases your uric acid levels, which leads to chronic, low-level inflammation. ✓ Optimize your production of vitamin D. As much as possible, regulate your vitamin D levels by regularly exposing large amounts of your skin to sunshine. If you cannot get sufficient sun exposure, taking an oral vitamin D3 supplement, along with vitamin K2 and magnesium, is highly advisable. Research by GrassrootsHealth suggests adults need about 8,000 IUs per day to achieve a serum level of 40 ng/ml, but you may need even more. It's best to get your blood level tested to be sure you're safely within the therapeutic range. Bodywork Methods That Reduce Pain Due to the inherent risks of addiction and the other unpleasant side effects of prescription painkillers, I recommend you pursue one or more of the following bodywork methods before taking a narcotic for pain. Each one has been demonstrated to be an effective treatment for lasting pain relief and management. • Acupuncture: According to The New York Times,18 an estimated 3 million American adults receive acupuncture annually, most often for the treatment of chronic pain. A study19 published in the Archives of Internal Medicine concluded acupuncture has a definite effect in reducing four types of chronic pain, including back and neck pain, chronic headache, osteoarthritis and shoulder pain — more so than standard pain treatment. The researchers stated: "[W]e found acupuncture to be superior to both no-acupuncture control and sham acupuncture for the treatment of chronic pain … Our results from individual patient data meta-analyses of nearly 18,000 patients in high-quality randomized controlled trials provide the most robust evidence to date that acupuncture is a reasonable referral option for patients with chronic pain." • Chiropractic adjustments: While previously used most often to treat back pain, chiropractic treatment addresses many other problems — including asthma, carpal tunnel syndrome, fibromyalgia, headaches, migraines, musculoskeletal pain, neck pain and whiplash. According to a study20 published in the Annals of Internal Medicine, patients with neck pain who used a chiropractor and/or exercise were more than twice as likely to be pain-free in 12 weeks compared to those who took medication. • Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT): EFT continues to be one of the easiest and most effective ways to deal with acute and chronic pain. The technique is simple and can be applied in mere minutes, helping you to overcome all kinds of bodily aches and pains. A study21 published in Energy Psychology examined the levels of pain in a group of 50 people attending a three-day EFT workshop, and found their pain dropped by 43 percent during the workshop. Six weeks later, their pain levels were reported to be 42 percent lower than before the workshop. As a result of applying EFT, participants felt they had an improved sense of control and ability to cope with their chronic pain. In the video featured below, EFT expert Julie Schiffman, teaches you how to use EFT to address chronic pain. • Massage: Massage releases endorphins, which help induce relaxation, relieve pain and reduce levels of stress chemicals such as cortisol and noradrenaline. A systematic review and meta-analysis22 published in the journal Pain Medicine, included 60 high-quality and seven low-quality studies that looked into the use of massage for various types of pain, including bone and muscle, fibromyalgia, headache and spinal-cord pain. The study revealed massage therapy relieves pain better than getting no treatment at all. When compared to other pain treatments like acupuncture and physical therapy, massage therapy still proved beneficial and had few side effects. In addition to relieving pain, massage therapy also improved anxiety and health-related quality of life. Final Thoughts About 'Chasing the Dragon' With respect to "Chasing the Dragon," U.S. FBI director James Comey said:23 "This film may be difficult to watch, but we hope it educates our students and young adults about the tragic consequences that come with abusing these drugs, and it will cause people to think twice before becoming its next victim." Every generation has its drug of choice, and Bassam suggests this generation's drug of choice is prescription opiates, which is far more devastating and addictive than anything law enforcement and the medical community have seen in the past. The current level of drug addiction in the U.S. is real and dangerous, says Bassam:24 "How do you know you're an addict? It's when you're doing something you know is not good for you, that's harming you, but you can't help yourself. When your relationships are starting to fall apart around you, and you don't care. When the only thing on your mind is how to get the substance and how to get to the next high — you're an addict. You can't maintain an opiate addiction and a normal life for very long." If someone you know is at risk for or is presently struggling with drug addiction, this raw and realistic documentary is worth your time.

[orbemnews]

A top health official warned relaxing Covid-19 measures threatens progress. A day later, more states said they were easing restrictions “The continued relaxation of prevention measures while cases are still high and while concerning variants are spreading rapidly throughout the United States is a serious threat to the progress we have made as a nation,” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Director Dr. Rochelle Walensky said Monday. “It’s really very much a race,” Dr. Peter Hotez, dean of the National School of Tropical Medicine at Baylor College of Medicine, told CNN on Monday. “If we can continue to accelerate the number of people vaccinated in this country… I think we’ll be in a much better position. But you have unfortunately a lot of governors releasing restrictions, people are traveling… and this B.1.1.7 variant.” “It could go either way,” he added, on whether the country could soon be facing another surge. Since the start of the month, at least a dozen state leaders have eased Covid-19 restrictions. And a day after both experts’ remarks, two more governors announced plans to relax some measures. Indiana Gov. Eric Holcomb announced Tuesday that starting April 6, the state’s face covering mandate will become a state mask advisory. Face masks will remain mandatory in state buildings and facilities as well as at Covid-19 testing and vaccination sites, the governor said. Also starting April 6, decisions about venue capacity will be in the hands of local officials, Holcomb said, and customers in restaurants, bars and nightclubs will also no longer be required to be seated. Six feet of spacing between tables is still recommended, he added. In Virginia, Gov. Ralph Northam announced that starting April 1, both indoor and outdoor gathering limits will increase and certain sports and entertainment venues will be able to operate with additional capacity. “While some capacity limits will be increased, we must all remember to stay vigilant and work together to protect ourselves, our loved ones, and our communities,” he said in a statement. With more vaccinations, Americans going out more Many state leaders — including those who have opted to relax restrictions — have in recent weeks expressed optimism about inching closer to the end of the pandemic, citing lowered Covid-19 numbers in comparison to the winter surge and increasing vaccinations. So far, more than 83.9 million Americans have received at least one dose of a Covid-19 vaccine, according to data from the CDC. More than 45.5 million are fully vaccinated, according to the data. That’s roughly 13.7% of the US population. At least two states — Alaska and New Mexico — have fully vaccinated more than one in five residents, data published Tuesday by the CDC shows. In New Mexico, more than a third of the population has received at least one dose of vaccine. Vaccine eligibility across the US As more Americans are vaccinated, the number of people going out is also increasing, according to a poll from Axios-Ipsos published Tuesday. Compared to a month ago, the number of people who have gone out to eat or visit friends and family are up 12 and 9 percentage points respectively, according to the poll — which was conducted March 19 to 22 and was made up of 995 Americans 18 and older. The number of people who believe that dining out poses a large risk to health and well-being has gone down to 23% compared to 33% a month ago. Those who have visited friends or relatives — 48% — is the highest since October. Additionally, 54% have visited a non-grocery retail store — the highest number since May. In some cases, it’s the unvaccinated who are driving the shift in behavior. For example, 52% of unvaccinated respondents say they’ve visited with friends or relatives in the last week, compared with 41% of people who have gotten the vaccine. The good news is that safety measures aren’t being abandoned. More than seven in 10 people still wear a mask whenever they leave the house and 80% said they will continue to do so even after being vaccinated. About 63% also said they will continue to social distance after vaccination. Experts worry AstraZeneca confusion may lead to vaccine hesitancy Meanwhile, AstraZeneca is soon expected to apply for emergency use authorization for its Covid-19 vaccine in the US, but some experts fear recent concerns over an announcement of its vaccine data could further contribute to hesitancy. In a Monday news release, AstraZeneca said its vaccine showed 79% efficacy against symptomatic disease and 100% efficacy against severe disease and hospitalization in a new, US-based clinical trial. But the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases said in a statement early Tuesday the independent board that reviews data from multiple vaccine candidates raised concerns about the company’s announcement. The board “expressed concern that AstraZeneca may have included outdated information from that trial, which may have provided an incomplete view of the efficacy data,” the NIAID statement said. Speaking on ABC’s “Good Morning America” on Tuesday, Dr. Anthony Fauci said the AstraZeneca news release may have contained misleading information about its vaccine efficacy — “an unforced error” that may create doubt about what is likely a good vaccine. The data is “really quite good, but when they put it into the press release, it wasn’t completely accurate,” Fauci said. AstraZeneca said in a statement Tuesday it will “immediately engage with the independent data safety monitoring board (DSMB) to share our primary analysis with the most up to date efficacy data,” adding that it intend to issue results of the primary analysis within 48 hours. One expert says she worries this may hinder confidence in the vaccines among Americans. “I am very concerned because there is already so much misinformation and disinformation out there,” emergency physician Dr. Leana Wen told CNN on Tuesday. “With this amount of public scrutiny, I think every company really should be aiming for full transparency and accountability and we really need to understand what happened here.” “AstraZeneca owes us an explanation,” she added. CNN’s Rebekah Riess, Deidre McPhillips and Naomi Thomas contributed to this report. 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US Coronavirus: A concerning variant is about to become dominant in the US, experts say, and how Americans act could help fuel or curb a surge The Transportation Security Administration said it screened more than 1.3 million people at airports Sunday — meaning about 5.2 million travelers flew since Thursday. That’s the highest number of people that have traveled by air during any other four-day period of the pandemic. It’s a combination of all those factors, officials fear, that could lay the groundwork for another spike. “We have seen footage of people enjoying spring break festivities, maskless,” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Director Dr. Rochelle Walensky said Monday. “This is all in the context of still 50,000 cases per day.” So is another surge inevitable? “We could go in either direction,” emergency physician Dr. Leana Wen told CNN on Monday. “What happens now is really up to us and whether we keep up masking and avoiding indoor gatherings as we should be until the point that we’re vaccinated.” You asked, we answered: Your top questions about Covid-19 and vaccines A dangerous variant will be dominant soon The safety measures will be especially crucial now that multiple variants of the virus are circulating — including the highly contagious B.1.1.7 variant that was first identified in the UK. It’s projected to become the dominant variant in the US by the end of this month or early April, Walensky said Monday. Cases of the B.1.1.7 variant have so far been found in 48 states, Puerto Rico and Washington, DC, according to CDC data. “The way the variants spread is by letting our guard down,” Dr. Richard Besser, the former acting CDC Director told CNN on Monday. “By not wearing masks, by not social distancing. If we can hang in there for a few more months, there will be enough vaccine for every adult in America to be vaccinated.” “Then we can truly let go of some of the restrictions that are in place. But if we do this too quickly, we could see an increase in cases, we could see a backslide that is occurring in many European countries and that does not have to be the outcome here in America,” he added.” Research published last week suggested that the variant was associated with an estimated 64% higher risk of dying from Covid-19. And another peer-reviewed study has linked the variant to a higher risk of death, according to a paper accepted by the journal Nature. This time, the risk of death from the variant was estimated around 55% higher than earlier strains after adjusting for a number of factors like age, sex, and where and when tests were conducted. A subsequent analysis in the study that accounted for missing and potentially miscategorized test results found the overall increased risk of death may be somewhat higher — around 61% more than earlier strains. The study was not able to factor in vaccination nor could it show why the variant might be more deadly than earlier strains. Daily vaccination numbers hit record levels But there is good news: Vaccinations are ramping up and experts are hopeful Americans will be able to see a semblance of normality by the summertime. Data updated by the CDC on Monday shows the country hit a seven-day average of about 2.4 million Covid-19 vaccine doses administered per day, a new record. That comes as more states expanded their eligibility requirements for vaccinations. In Mississippi, Gov. Tate Reeves announced Monday the state would be opening up appointments to all residents who are 16 and older starting Tuesday. Pfizer’s Covid-19 vaccine is the only one available for use by people who are 16 or older, while the Moderna and Johnson & Johnson vaccines are restricted to people 18 or older. “Starting tomorrow, ALL new appointments will be open to ALL Mississippians. Get your shot friends – and let’s get back to normal!” he wrote on Twitter. In West Virginia, Gov. Jim Justice expanded the list of pre-existing medical conditions that make residents eligible to receive a vaccine. “We’re on a glide slope to being able to get our lives back to normal, and that’s what we want more than anything,” Justice said. So far, more than 71 million Americans have received at least one dose of a Covid-19 vaccine, according to CDC data. More than 38 million have been fully vaccinated — roughly 11.5% of the US population. Most Americans are getting their second dose on time Also, most people who have received a first dose of a Covid-19 vaccine are getting their second dose on time, according to early data from the CDC. But the CDC researchers warned that the initial groups prioritized to receive the vaccine — healthcare workers and long-term care facility residents — have had easy access to a second dose through their workplace or residence. “As priority groups broaden, adherence to the recommended dosing interval might decrease,” they wrote in the report that published Monday. For the Pfizer and Moderna vaccines, it is recommended second doses be administered 21 and 28 days later, respectively, but the researchers noted in their report that up to 42 days between doses is permissible, if needed. The report includes data on more than 37 million people who received at least their first shot between December 14 and February 14. Among those who had received both doses, the researchers found that 95.6% received their second dose within the recommended time interval. They noted that severe weather events led to distribution challenges and canceled appointments during the time of the study and more research will be needed to examine the completion of second doses over a longer period of time. “Continued monitoring of series completion status across jurisdictions and by demographic characteristics is important to ensure equity in vaccine administration and vaccination coverage, especially as vaccination efforts expand to additional population groups,” they wrote. CNN’s Michael Nedelman, LaCrisha McAllister, Gregory Lemos, Deidre McPhillips, Pete Muntean and Jacqueline Howard contributed to this report. 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