#LOLOLOL THIS WAS JUST SUPPOSED TO BE A CUTE LITTLE THING | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

bitbugbites-re · 1 year ago

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𝙳𝙰𝙼𝚂𝙴𝙻 // 𝔠𝔞𝔯𝔩𝔬𝔰 𝔬𝔩𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔦𝔯𝔞 𝔵 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯

As summer comes to an end, you’re desperate to get some pool time in while you still can. However, since it’s now October, you’re pretty much out of luck. Luckily for you, there’s an indoor pool at the Y. Not to mention, it comes along with a cute pool boy!

a03 link

word count: ~8.6k

gender: fem! reader

cw: NSFW, FLUFF // drowning // ktober

a/n: literally supposed to be reading the bible for class rn but god be damned, this lady knows how to write erotic fiction !!!

p.s. -- if you're only interested in the smut, you can scroll down until you reach the thin black bar lololol

You’re not crazy. You just want to swim.

Frowning, you stared down your phone as you read the most recent messages from your friends. They were replying to the flurry of texts you had just sent.

The first response read: “Girl. Lol.”

The next was: “You didn’t think about this in September???”

And the last response wasn’t even a response. It was a TikTok link leading to a video about things to do while in Vegas. You didn’t even live in Vegas. You’re on the East Coast.

You sighed, placing the phone down for a second before popping a Keurig cup into the proper machine, waiting for it to finish warming the water. When the buttons lit up, you pressed 12oz and leaned over the counter, one of your hands resting on your cheek. With your free hand, you picked your phone back up and re-read your initial texts as you listened to the liquid pour a straight line into your mug.

“u guys”

“I wanted to go swimming at least once this summer but I forgot”

“do u think there are any pools still open??? I don’t even care if its cold im desperate”

Yeah, so maybe you are a little crazy after all. It was October, and there was no way that even one pool would be open. You felt a little defeated, your desperation morphing into disappointment. Suddenly, the whirring of the Keurig slowed before spitting out the last bits of bitterly strong tea, a burning droplet jumping out and landing on your hand. You wondered if that was the Keurig��s way of calling you crazy as well.

Shaking your hand before wiping it with the opposite sleeve of your shirt, you stood up straight and leaned your back against the counter. With your phone in hand, you tapped out a string of shushing emojis in the group chat. Fuck it. You’re crazy and you’re proud.

You then pressed the video on, “Fun Things To Do In Vegas” which was accompanied by three exclamation points and a couple of emojis with their tongues out. The emojis implication almost made you a little scared of what “things” were going to be listed in the TikTok.

Before you could actually watch the video, though, a notification from your group chat popped up. It was from the friend who sent the Vegas video – they likely just now actually read the chat.

“Claire: Wait, what about the YMCA near your house? Doesn’t it have an indoor pool? Probably not the same kind of swimming that u were thinking of, but it’d be swimming lol.”

Oh shit. That’s a good idea. – Is what you both thought and simultaneously typed in response. Not missing a beat, you opened the search engine app on your phone and looked up the YMCA closest to you. Just under the images (which mostly consisted of it’s pool, oddly enough), you noticed that it was open from 5 A.M. to 9 P.M.

It was only 6:30 P.M. right now. Meaning, it was still open.

You switched back to the group chat’s tab and typed away.

“guess who’s going to the pool tonight”

“(it’s me)”

“anyone wanna come with?”

Surprisingly, the responses flooded in pretty quickly. They said:

“Claire: I wish, but I’ve got a class in an hour. I knew it was a bad decision to pick a class at 7 at night smh. Can’t ever meet up with u guys on weekends anymore :/”

“Ada: Can’t. Lots of work. Maybe next time.”

“Jill: Sorry, I’m at work right now. Had to pick up my coworker’s shift again. How about on the weekend?”

You groaned out a whine, throwing a mini-tantrum. You didn’t really want to go alone, because what fun would that be? Nonetheless, you didn’t want to wait for the weekend either. It was rare you guys ever actually had the same schedule, so you were sure the plans would just end up getting canceled or be pushed back even further. You’d just have to go alone.

You typed out a message informing your friends of your plan before placing the phone down with a heavy hand. Dragging your way down the narrow hall to your room, you plopped yourself down on your knees, opening up the dresser drawer that stored your bathing suits. You had an idea of which one you were going to wear, as it was a black one-piece with a deep-wired V down the front – It was appealing in the way that it wasn’t too revealing, but not unattractively modest either. Perfect for a venue that was family-friendly and not as free as the beach.

After a couple of minutes of rummaging, you slumped down to a hunch and huffed. You couldn’t seem to find the swimsuit. Not even after pulling out each bathing suit one by one. You searched, and searched, and searched, but it was nowhere to be found.

You caved to your frustration and picked out a bikini instead. You didn’t have any other swimsuits, so it was either a simplistic bikini or nothing. And after all that hullabaloo in the group chat, you were not choosing nothing.

Changing quickly, you then grabbed your things and headed for the car. It was now already after 6:45 P.M., and you were running out of time before the Y would close.

Soon enough, you were turning your car wheel to pull into the YMCA’s parking lot. You found a spot fairly fast and quickly put the car in park, removing your keys from the hole with a twist and pull of the wrist. As the car’s engine whirred, shutting off, you observed the parking lot. You noticed there weren’t too many cars. Hopefully, most of the people would be in the gym or another section of the Y and not the pool, you thought to yourself.

Stepping out of your car, you held onto the handle as you got dusted in the face by the wind, your hair flinging all over the place. The wind was pretty bad, but the chill alone was enough for you to huddle your arms over your body before running into the building. You were starting to regret coming to the pool so late in the day, especially in October, nonetheless. At least the air smelled nice, though; there must’ve been a place nearby having a bonfire, as there was a heavy waft of burning wood.

You pulled the heavy glass door open, practically swinging it with all your might, and walked in heaving. Maybe you should be going to the gym instead of the pool – how could you be out of breath from only a short jog across the parking lot?

No matter, you walked up to the counter and paid for a day pass. You got to go in free since you’re a first-time visitor, although you felt a little guilty considering it was going to be wasted on a less than two-hour excursion. It was probably fine though – you don’t think you’d need to go to the Y again after this, anyway.

Walking through the building, you admired the decorative furniture and monotone walls contrasted with bright accent walls and signs. It had a clean, modern look and you were pretty impressed by how well-kept it was; it must’ve been hard for the janitors who worked there considering it was a pretty big community establishment. You appreciated how spotless they were able to keep it with this knowledge in mind.

Soon, you found your way to the pool after getting lost and asking a very tired-looking staff member. You almost felt bad interrupting them – their dark undereye mixed with the lighting made them look as if they were ready to be taken out back and put down. Not that you blame them – they must’ve been here for a while now. You were sure you’d look like that too if you had to work until nine at night.

As you pushed the door to the pool open, you were immediately exposed to the hot, humid air. Typical of a pool. You had to admit, though, it felt pretty good as compared to the cold breeze outside. Besides, you probably wouldn’t feel this type of heat again unless you decided to put your heater on full blast in winter. Although that would turn your room into what was practically an oven and not a fun chlorine-smelling paradise – so maybe it wasn’t the same after all.

You observed the area, your eyes immediately landing on the few kids splashing around in the middle of the pool. Great. In situations like these, you tend to sit on the side of the stairs to the pool – but that spot seemed to be occupied by a group of older men and women, so you crossed that option off. You didn’t feel like getting dragged into a conversation about retirement homes, or grandchildren, or…stuff. You weren’t really sure what the elderly chatted about.

Admitting defeat, you decided to just go sit on one of the pool chairs instead. You figured you’d just wait it out, betting that both the kids and the elderly wouldn’t stay for much longer. It was almost pitch-black outside, and seeing both children and old people at night was practically like spotting a leprechaun next to a pot of gold, you thought.

As soon as you sat and plopped your stuff down in the middle-most chair, you took in a breath and looked around. And that’s when you saw him.

You swore your heart stopped beating for a second. He was gorgeous.

Most of the men you came across on a day-to-day basis looked downright horrendous, dressed in sweats and backward caps with dumb labels like “GymRat,” so to see a fit man with a haircut that suited his looks and facial scruff that looked like it was actively trimmed was like seeing that your younger sibling didn’t pick all of the marshmallows out of your favorite cereal and eat them. A blessing, that’s what this is, you thought.

You figured he was the lifeguard, as he was sitting in the lifeguard’s chair, leaning back with one leg dangling and the other using his heel to support his placement on the seat. He had one arm lazing on the armrest, while the other held his tilted head in place as he watched the kids dash up waves of water at one another. Every once in a while, his lips would curve into an amused smile, and he’d shake his black curls out of his face, eyes not straying from the children at play. Cute, you thought.

Watching him for a while longer, you noticed three things about him:

His eyes stayed trained on the kids in the pool, not the elderly. Every once in a while, if they made a sudden movement, he’d sit up, as if he were ready to leap from the tall chair at a moment's notice.

He seemed to be pretty proud of his body, or at least his looks. His posture was confident in nature and he never covered up any part of his body with his arms.

He had a charismatic personality, or at the very least, was on good terms with the janitors. Every time they passed by, he’d quickly turn his head, see who it was, and make a comment of some sort. He always had a grin on his face as he did, and never showed a bit of discourtesy nor dislike, even if the janitor didn’t return the energy.

Of course, those weren’t the only things you noticed about him. You also noticed he had a great body. Did you mention he had a great body? He had a great body.

He didn’t even need to be shirtless for you to tell. His arms and thighs were fat with muscle, his calves fit for a marathon runner, and his chest with mounds big enough that you wouldn’t be surprised if he knew how to flex them one at a time, as a kind of party trick.

You also could tell that he was a pretty hairy guy, not that you were complaining. You liked that in a man. You wondered what it would feel like to run your hands down his arm as his legs brushed up against the skin of–

And then he looked in your direction. He saw you. As you were at your apex of wanting to eat him alive.

Your face burned with embarrassment as his eyes met yours, and before you made a fool out of yourself, you looked away. Grabbing your phone which now felt sticky from the humidity, you pulled up the group chat, pretending to be busy.

“guys”

“there’s a rly cute lifeguard here and he caught me staring”

“im so embarrassed”

You stared at the screen for a while, waiting for your friends to respond, but none came.

Damn. Why is it that whenever you need a distraction, no one is active?

It didn’t take long after for you to give up, slinking your phone back down. You picked up a book instead, sneakily glancing up at the lifeguard once more to see if he was still looking your way. He wasn’t. His eyes were trained back on the kids, which surprisingly, made you feel a little disappointed.

You read for a while until eventually, you received a notification.

“Ada: Lol. You have a crush?”

“Ada: You should go up to him.”

The longer you considered Ada’s suggestion, the more your heart raced. You seriously considered it for a moment, but abruptly shut it down after thinking about how weird it actually might be.

“I can’t do that”

“I don’t even know what I’d say”

Ada replied almost immediately.

“Ada: Then make him want to go up to you.”

It wasn’t bad advice. You thought about it for a bit, staring at the paved concrete below your pool chair. An ant scurried on by, passing your left foot, and once it was out of sight, you snapped out of your daze and returned your head to a forward position.

Once you did, you noticed the lifeguard’s gaze on you. He was looking at you first this time.

As soon as your eyes met, he flung his head to the side, pretending to rub his neck. It was pretty awkward to watch, as his hands moved aimlessly and unpurposeful, as there was really no physical reason for him to need to touch his neck. It was easy to tell that he was only doing it to play off the fact that he was caught staring, too.

His attraction – or at the very least, interest, was mutual, then. You felt a fire of confidence rising in your chest, and you now knew how you’d get him to come up to you first.

You stood up from your chair, keeping him in your peripheral view, pretending to dust yourself off before seeing his head move back in your direction. Good, he was watching you again.

Very slowly, you began to remove the regular clothes that rested atop your bikini. Once fully stripped to your swimsuit, you made sure to fold your clothes neatly. After each article was folded, you would bend over, your behind facing his direction, placing it flatly onto the pool chair. Each time you did this, you couldn’t tell if he was looking, but you were sure that he wouldn’t have been able to resist at minimum, a glance.

Once done, you began to walk towards the water. You felt a little conscious in your stride, your step heavy, but also determined to play it cool. When approaching the stairs of the pool, you grabbed onto the accompanying handlebar, creating a divide in the water as you were further submerged. You passed the elderly group, and once they thought you were out of earshot, one exclaimed, “I wish I still had a young body like that.” The others chuckled, agreeing with the notion. You blushed and continued your journey to an empty spot in the pool.

Wading through the water, you then came up near the area where the kids were playing. You went to the side opposite the lifeguard’s chair and leaned against the wall. It was a little noisy – no, very noisy being near the kids. On top of that, you were occasionally hit with splatters of water every time they tried to mimic professional swimmers, but at least your plan was working. You think.

You weren’t really sure because you were too scared to look back up at the lifeguard. But that’s OK. All girlbosses have their weak moments.

While lost in thought trying to figure out your next step on alluring the lifeguard (as, for some reason, he wasn’t already proposing marriage and offering a bride-dowry to your parents consisting of 400 sheep, 200 goats, fifty pieces of silver, a years’ worth of unleavened bread, and seven years’ labor), you noticed two children playing roughly, one a bone-thin blonde, and the other a brunette missing one of his front teeth.

The blonde child was in a small floaty, laughing as his friend tried to swim under the tube and get inside of it with him. Every time he dived under the water, the boy would swerve his donut-shaped float, swimming a few inches away, laughing. This went on for a while, until eventually, the blonde boy switched his tactic and began pushing his friend’s head away from his float while under the water.

You grew concerned as you watched, knowing they were starting to get a little too carried away, and you looked around for their parents. You then spotted a couple of adults on the pool chairs near the towel rack, busy conversing about something you couldn’t hear. You weren’t sure what to do and turned your head back to the kids, and then there was a stifled thump.

Your heart started to race as the blonde boy started to look worried, noticing his friend wasn’t coming up out of the water. You noticed what was happening when the child leaned over his tube, holding his reddened elbow, freezing in place.

The toothless boy was knocked out.

The child with scrawny arms somehow managed to deal a blow hard enough for his friend to lose consciousness. He whipped his head around to get the lifeguard’s attention, desperately screaming, “Help! Help!”

The lifeguard was already halfway down the chair even before the boy started yelling. It seemed like his gaze had been so focused on the children earlier because he knew something like this was bound to happen.

The child was now sobbing, looking around for his parents, of which the whole group was now running over to see what the commotion was about.

You saw the kid whose body started to sink downwards, your heartbeat stammering in your chest.

You had to do something.

Launching yourself forward, you began to swim to the child nearby. As you did, you heard the lifeguard jump in the pool, a loud splash of water mixing in with the cries of the children’s parents.

You made it to the boy under the water first, diving straight down. Once you got a hold of him, you yanked his arm up, pulled him to your body, and positioned his behind on your arm, so that his head would immediately be above the water.

Both of you came up, and you gasped for air, blinking rapidly so that you could see. The lifeguard was right next to you, hurriedly taking the boy from your arms, rushing him toward the edge of the pool, and plopping him down on the concrete. You followed over, as did pretty much everyone at the pool, watching the lifeguard push desperately at his chest.

After a short while, which actually felt like forever, the boy gasped, throwing up the water that was in his lungs. The lifeguard helped the boy sit up a little, rubbing his back as he continued his violent coughs and sobs. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” he whispered. “I got’cha, bud.”

Once the brunette had finally gotten a hold of himself, he ran to his parents, who held him and began petting his head. The other parents, who seemed to all be friends, began thanking the lifeguard profusely on both the boy's and his parent’s behalf.

The lifeguard was crouched, slightly hunched over, breathing heavily, simply shaking his head to assure them it was okay. “Just doin’ my job,” he smiled despite the apparent stress on his face, “Actually, you should be thanking the kind lady over there.”

His gaze moved from the worry-stricken parents to you. “She’s the one who saved his life.”

You blushed, your eyes moving from him, then to the parents, not sure what to say. You didn’t think you did that much.

The parents came up to you and began thanking you as well, telling you how brave it was of you to dive in after the boy. You were only able to stammer out a couple of “it’s no problem’s” and “thank you’s” in return.

Soon, almost everyone left the pool, deciding they had witnessed enough of the pool for the night. Even the group of elderly packed their things and headed towards the changing room.

You too had figured it was probably time to go, forgetting your entire plan of romancing the man who had just previously given you all the credit when he was the one to bring the boy back from unconsciousness.

However, as you turned and began walking back to your stuff, the lifeguard ran up to your side, trying to get your attention. “Hey, hey.”

You turned to face him, stopping in place. “Um–yes?” you said, a little taken aback at his greeting, not expecting him to have started a conversation.

“Ah–oh,” he said, tripping on his words. “I just wanted to thank you, for saving the kid.”

You smiled at his words. “Sure,” you said. You then tilted your head, quirking a brow. “I didn’t really do much, though. You did more than me, so–”

He quickly cut you off, a tint of excitement in his voice. “No, no! If you hadn’t gotten him out, he would’ve been under even longer. Every second matters–you saved his life. I only got the water ‘outta his airway.”

You blushed a little at his enthusiasm for your act of heroism. “Well, uh, thank you–”

“You were so cool,” he said, and you swore you felt your heart explode.“Thanks,” you mumbled out, and soon enough, silence grew between the two of you. You were trying to figure out what to say back.

“Well, I should–” the lifeguard started to say, turning his body to leave. You scrambled for a response back, not wanting him to go.

“You were cool, too.” You said, your voice sounding a little wobbly. You felt your face start to grow red, your blood rising in degrees with every millisecond that passed.

The lifeguard seemed shy now, too, raising an arm behind his head, rubbing at his neck like he did earlier. “Oh–really?”

“Y-yeah,” you breathed out.

There was silence once more before the lifeguard laughed a little and held out his hand to you. “I’m Carlos. It’s nice to meet ‘ya, Phelps.”

You took his hand, shaking it gently. He had a good handshake, and his hand felt huge in your own. “Phelps?” you said, not really understanding why he was referring to you as that.

“You know, Michael Phelps? The swimmer guy? Because you dove in to get the kid?”

You let out a long “ooooooh” as soon as you recognized what he was talking about, and laughed in response. “Pretty rude to call a lady Michael Phelps, dont’cha think?”

He laughed back before running his hand through his hair – which, miraculously, was able to stay dry since you were the one to reach the kid underwater. “Sorry, pretty lady. What should I call you then?”

You blushed a little upon hearing him call you “pretty lady,” a cheeky grin growing on your face. “You can call me Y/N. Or pretty lady, too. I don’t mind either.”

He laughed, shaking his head in an amused manner. He placed his hands on his hips, and tilted his head back a little, grinning. “Okay, pretty lady. How old are you? You in college?”

You nodded your head. “Yeah. What about you?”

“Yep. I’m a senior. You?”

You replied, and from there, your conversation began to take off. You talked about things as small as favorite colors, to medium things like what your majors were, to big things like how many dogs were too many dogs for a person to have. You both seemed to click really well, and you had to admit, you had never met someone as easy to talk to before Carlos.

As you both started passionately debating on whether or not the pool slide was white or beige, an announcement sounded over the speakers.

“Attention guests, the YMCA will be closing in five minutes. Please make sure to gather all your things and head to the exit. Those who are still in the building after closing will be escorted outside by staff. Thank you for choosing the YMCA, and we hope to see you again soon!”

You and Carlos looked at one another, not sure what to say.

You realized then, that all this time, you’d been keeping Carlos from leaving when he probably could’ve packed up early for the night. Embarrassed, you jumped up from where you both had been sitting. At some point during your conversation (before its interruption), you both had sat at the edge of the pool, your legs resting in the water.

“Shit, I’m sorry for keeping you–” you said. “I’ll go get my things so you can leave–I’m so sorry–”

As you turned in a hurry to go get your stuff, you felt Carlos’ hand rest on your shoulder, stopping you. “Hey, hey–you’re fine, you’re fine.”

You jumped a little at the contact, your face turning red, and once you turned to face Carlos, you noticed he had realized what he had done.

You were wearing a swimsuit. You had on practically next to nothing. And he, a stranger, was touching you.

He pulled his hand back, going to rub his neck, but pausing as he began to raise it. It seemed like he didn’t know what to do with himself now. “Uh–”

“Sorry, shit–I didn’t mean to–uh,” he stumbled. “Was that weird?”

You took in a deep breath and averted your gaze. “No. No, you’re fine.”

“Are–are you sure?” he pushed.

“Yes, yes, you’re fine. Don’t worry.”

“Well, I’m worrying. You can tell me if–”

You sighed and looked him in his eyes. “It’s fine. I liked it.”

Upon hearing the words come out of your mouth, you froze. Your frustration with his reluctance to accept your assurance must have gotten to you, as you didn’t mean to say the last part.

“You liked it?” he said. He seemed a little surprised, with a mix of something else. You weren’t quite sure what.

“Um. Yeah–yeah.” you asserted. And then there was silence again.

Unable to take the awkward tension, you cracked a joke. “I’m flattered by your desperation to keep me from leaving. Very, uh–flattering touch.”

Turns out you weren’t very good at jokes.

Nonetheless, he seemed to like it. He chuckled a little, which made your heartbeat increase in pace. He seemed to have good humor even in cringy situations. You liked that.

“Well, I’m glad you’re flattered, at least. I’d do it again if I needed to.” He smiled.

You blushed, and that’s when your mouth started to move on its own. “Then do it.”

“What?” he said, a little surprised.

“I’m on my way to leave. The building closes in…” You checked the clock on the wall. “...a minute or less. If you don’t want me to leave, then touch me again.” You looked up at him expectantly.

He paused for a minute and it was clear he was debating on what to do. You waited, watching him shift in place – going to rub his neck again, as he had been doing whenever he was nervous.

Suddenly, it was 9 P.M. and the announcement over the loudspeaker played, declaring it was closing time and all the guests who hadn’t left yet needed to begin their way on exiting the building. Your heart dropped a little, taking his lack of response before the loudspeaker’s interjection as a “no.”

You smiled weakly, taking the hint. You turned to grab your things off the pool chair and spoke. “Well, it was nice to–”

In a heartbeat, he grabbed your shoulder with a sense of determination, spinning you towards him. He placed one hand on your hip, pulling you in, before kissing you with wild passion.

You felt the roughness of his stubble first and then the softness of his lips. Slowly, you closed your eyes, kissing him back.

He was a fast kisser, constantly changing the way he sucked at your lips, alternating between tilting his head to the side so that he could press his mouth into yours, and tilting his head downwards so that he could pull your mouth while you struggled to stay connected. He was constantly desperate for more access as if he wanted to make sure you felt him all over your lips, not one spot untouched.

Your hands rested on his soaking wet shirt that clung to his skin from when he had jumped into the pool to save the kid. It felt a little cold, but you got used to it as your kiss continued.

The only thing the two of you could hear was each other’s heavy breathing, along with the smack of your lips as they collided. That was, until, the sound of the pool door opened.

Both you and Carlos separated immediately, your lips feeling cold at the sudden touch of air, missing the warmth of Carlos’ own warm lips. You did, however, still feel the tingle left from his feverish push-and-pull play.

With about a two-foot distance now between the two of you, you both looked over to see what the noise was exactly.

In walked an older woman, one you would’ve guessed was in her early 60’s. Her hair was completely gray, resting in a shaggy bun with little hairs falling out. She looked rough – and ready to go home for the night.

“H–hey, Mary. You almost done for the night?”

She eyed him suspiciously before replying. “Wouldn’t that be a damn miracle.”

She continued to go about her business, and you felt awkward watching their conversation.

Suddenly, Carlos’ head shot towards you and then back towards Mary. “Oh, uh, I was just about to escort this…young, damsel-in-distress out of the building. She didn’t know where the exit was, you see.”

You shot him a dirty look as if saying, “I know where the exit is.”

Mary didn’t seem to care. She simply took the mop out of the water in the cleaning cart and plopped it on the floor. It made an uncomfortably loud squelch sound in an otherwise silent room. “Mmm.”

Carlos grabbed your things for you, and put an arm around your shoulder. “Well, I’ve gotta maintain my status as a gentleman, so…we’ll be on our way! See ‘ya later, Mary!”

It sounded like she mumbled out an “I hope not,” but you weren’t too sure.

The two of you walked quickly to the door, and once it shut behind you, Carlos let go of your arm.

“Well, that was, uh–something?” He smiled, still holding onto your clothes and other items.

“Yeah,” you said, before looking up at him with an amused smile. “Damsel-in-distress, huh?”

He laughed and shuffled on his feet. “What, you the type that doesn’t like to be saved?”

You smirked. “Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. You wanna find out?”

He grinned as he looked at you, raising a brow in an amused fashion. “Only because you make it sound so alluring.”

After hearing his reply, you closed in on his body, wrapping your arms around his neck. You stood on your tippy-toes, whispering in his ear as your cheek brushed against his lengthy hair and scratchy stubble. “I’ll show you every part of me that you want, but you need to take me somewhere private first.”

You pulled back, and you saw that he was grinning. It was evident in his eyes alone that he was excited, although, there was a mix of something else, too. The other kind of excitement, perhaps – it was a very lustful look.

He held out his hand, and as you took it, he led you down the hall. You both laughed a little at the situation, adrenaline coursing through your veins. It was cold in the building, probably mostly because you still only had on a bikini, but you weren’t too focused on it. The warmth of Carlos’ hand and the anticipation for what you both were about to do were the main things on your mind right now.

Soon enough, Carlos pulls you into a room, and you look around, observing it. It was a locker room, although you hadn’t noticed whether it was for men, women, or unisex. You figured it didn’t matter all that much, though – it’s not likely that anyone would walk in.

Carlos twirled you around, pulling you into his chest again. He looked down at you, smiling before leaning down and kissing you.

This time, his kiss was soft and exploratory. He took his time, not making any wild moves, although still leading the pace like he did the first time he kissed you. Maybe you were a damsel-in-distress after all – it was starting to seem like you were swept up in his game with no escape.

After a while, he broke away from the kiss, looking at you with gentle eyes.

“I don’t have a key to lock the door. Someone could walk in. Is that okay?”

You laughed a little, smiling. “Let them walk in.”

He chuckled back, speaking in a soft voice as he pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. “You’re a bold girl, huh?”

Before you could respond, his lips were back on yours. His hands moved down your back before interlacing his fingers, keeping you pressed to him.

The kiss you shared was slow again at first, but it didn’t take long for it to pick up again. At the apex of your kiss, Carlos pulled his lips away, moving them to the corner of your mouth, to your cheek, and finally to your neck. It tickled at first due to his facial hair, and you let out a small laugh, but eventually, it started to feel really good.

He found all of the sweet spots on your neck, sucking and licking, desperate to hear the pleased moans that escaped you every time he touched you the way you liked. Once he seemed to want more, he began to travel further down your body. You smiled when he ventured over your breasts, gasped when he reached your stomach, and paused when he kissed your pelvic area.

Petting his hair, you spoke. “Carlos?”

“Hmm?” He mumbled, looking up at you. He was waiting for you to give the go-ahead.

You felt a little nervous asking, but you knew it was important. “Have you been tested recently?”

He paused, thinking. “I haven’t been sexually active for a while, so I haven’t gone to get a test any time recent. The last time I did, though, there were no concerns.” He then picked up your leg, throwing it over his broad shoulder. He placed a kiss on your inner thigh. “Is that okay?”

You nodded your head and returned to running your fingers through his curls. He smiled up at you and started kissing through the bottom piece of your swimsuit again.

Once he figured he had done enough teasing, he removed your leg off his shoulder, slipping the bottoms down. You stepped out of it, and he picked your leg up again, placing it in its former position on his shoulder.

“You’ve got a pretty pussy.” he said nonchalantly, placing a kiss on where the slit started.

You laughed a little, pulling his head back to look up at you. He let you do it. “And you’ve got a pretty face to look at while you eat my pretty pussy.”

He let out a small exhale of a laugh, and you felt his breath brush up against your clit. Your grip on his head shivered, and it didn’t go unnoticed.

Soon enough, he was licking and kissing your soft spot. He took his time, remaining very gentle and attentive. No tremble, no shake, no quiver went unnoticed while he worked.

As you started to get closer to orgasm, you pulled him by his hair, tilting his head up at you. His eyes were half-lidded, staring up at you, his lapping at your folds unwavering.

You rubbed yourself a little more forcibly into him, grinding against his face. He seemed to like it, as he placed a hand on your hip, bringing you down even harder onto him every time you pushed up against him.

You felt yourself getting close, and the moans you had been stifling were getting hard to hold in. “Fucking god, Carlos, I’m close.” you murmured.

Carlos didn’t respond, nor speed up, he simply shut his eyes and kept the pace he had been going at. You stared down at his eyelashes, admiring how long they were as you came.

Your body shook a little, and once the high was over, you were panting, relying on Carlos to hold you up. He slowly pulled away, placing your leg back down, running his hands up your body as he stood up with you.

He held you for a moment, placing your head against his chest, and rubbing your back as you calmed down.

Once your breathing was steady, you pulled away from him, grabbing him by the shirt. His eyes widened, and he gave you an amused look.

You clung to him for a moment, before running your hands down his body as you got onto your knees in front of him.

Panicked, he took your hands off him and held them gently. “Hey, hey– you don’t have to–”

You looked up at him, still panting a little. “I’m paying you back.”

He shook his head, and then let go of one of your hands to caress your face. “Nah. Not this time. You can pay me back another time. After all, if I let you pay me back now, you might just run away and I won’t get to see you again.”

He smiled down at you as he said it, and you blushed a little when you realized he said not this time. That meant that there would be other times.

He then helped you up to your feet and kissed you again. It was a gentle kiss, but after your last orgasm, you were feeling needy for something faster.

You took the lead from him, kissing him as aggressively as you could to show that you were ready for him to be a little more rough with you. He seemed to get the hint but pulled away from the kiss.

“I don’t have a condom,” he said, seeming a little downcast at the thought.

You smiled at him, your arms now around his neck. “I do.”

He perked up a little and smirked at you. “You’re a little too prepared for a damsel-in-distress, aren’t you?”

You laughed and replied as you went to get the condom from your purse. “I’d say I’m just the right amount of prepared.”

As you walked back over to him with the condom, he pulled you in and started kissing your neck once more. He moved from up, down, up, down, then up again before whispering in your ear. “Think you’re prepared enough to put it on me?”

You laughed at his smooth words, and you whispered back. “What, you don’t know how to put one on yourself?”

He chuckled, and pulled away, taking the condom as you handed it to him. He tore it open using his teeth, staring down at you as he did it. Once it was open, you made a smart remark. “You know you’re not supposed to use your teeth to get it out, right?”

He chuckled, placing the wrapper and condom in his palm. He made a closed fist and went to remove his clothes. You admired his body as he did – and in regards to your earlier comment about him being a hairy man, you were right. He had just the right amount of chest hair, as well as a happy trail stemming from his trimmed pubic area. “Guess you were right – I don’t know how to put one on, after all.”

You laughed, watching him slide the thin condom onto his shaft. He was pretty big – you were a little worried about being able to fit all of him in.

Once he was certain the condom was on well, he looked over at you before picking you up in a rush. You giggled, wrapping your legs around his hips and burying your head in his neck. After a couple of seconds, you felt the cold wall against your back, and arched into him a little, trying to escape from the freezing touch.

He made a hmm noise that sounded amused at your squirming and then began pecking little kisses on your neck. You slowly eased back against the wall, getting used to the cold.

Once you did, Carlos began to press his body into you. You could tell Carlos enjoyed getting as much skin-on-skin as he could when intimate because he was always somehow buried in your touch.

His hips ground his cock into your stomach, humping you slowly as he continued to suck your neck. You were starting to get a little impatient now, wanting him inside you already, and so the next time he ground into you, you ground back.

He didn’t seem to be expecting it, as he let out a throaty, closed-mouth moan. He got the hint, though, as he pulled back a little, and propped himself at your entrance.

Slowly, he lowered you down onto his cock. He inserted the head first, watching your expression to see if it was okay. You winced a little, and he noticed.

Whispering, he tried to encourage you while he eased into you. “You’re doing good, Y/N. Most damsels-in-distress would’ve given up by now.”

You laughed, feeling him sink into you more. He smiled, watching your face as you adjusted. “Want me to make some noise for you?” he said, lowering his voice.

You nodded your head, interested in what noises he was going to make.

He placed his head on your shoulder, beginning to make subtle grunts and moans the more his cock delved into you.

You started to get a little more wet from hearing his voice, turned on by the presumable pleasure he was feeling as he moved in deeper and deeper. Eventually, he was fully in, and you were more than ready to get started.

You tapped his shoulder, insinuating that you were good to go. He picked his head up from your collarbone, then pressed his forehead against yours as he began to pull out, then push back in.

Both of you gasped silently, gripping one another as a way to express how good it felt. He continued to move, alternating the way he did it, going from rolling his hips in a continuous rhythm to jerkily bucking into you. Carlos was proving to be a spontaneous lover, and you had to admit, you enjoyed being kept on your toes.

Eventually, things started to pick up, and Carlos was now thrusting into you with a feverish desire. You moaned into his mouth as he kissed you, hearing his heavy breathing every time he pulled away for air. You knew it wouldn’t be much longer until he came, and so you decided that you would start making your way to orgasm as well.

One of your arms reached down to your clit, and you began to rub yourself while Carlos buried himself in you. He pulled away from the kiss with a pop, which actually wasn’t as audible, since it was drowned out by the sound of both of your breathing, moaning, and collision of skin.

He buried his head into your neck, a slur of whines, grunts, and moans escaping his lips.

You listened to his voice, closing your eyes, and focusing on reaching your climax. It didn’t take long after he caught on that you were right there, and whispered in your ear, “Do it. Cum on me. Cum on my cock.”

As you came down from your high, you trembled in Carlos’ arms. You noticed he was starting to become shaky himself, and you were a little worried as you felt his hands wobble underneath your bottom. It was likely that his arms were getting tired from holding you up for a prolonged amount of time.

You pulled his head in close, whispering in his ear. As you did, you heard his breath hitch, panting as if he were desperate for air. “Carlos,” you said, “Let me help you cum. What do you need?”

He opened his mouth to speak, but only a moan came out at first. “My back…scratch up my back.”

You listened to what he asked, digging your nails into his skin, softly at first, and then a little more rough once you felt him shiver. He seemed to like it a lot.

He continued, which surprised you a little. You thought he would’ve stopped at his one request, but he didn’t. He must’ve been a needy man. “Kiss my neck,” he huffed, “please, Y/N.”

You followed what he asked, kissing on his neck as you clawed up the muscles on his back. It didn’t take much longer after that, and soon enough his entire body was trembling. He thrust a couple more times into you, grunting as he did, and you felt his cock jerk as he spilled his warm seed into the condom.

As soon as he came, his hands lost most of their grip on holding you, and you unwrapped your legs around his waist, jumping down. You felt him press into you, heaving as if he weren’t getting any air. You smiled and decided to comfort him as he did for you earlier after eating you out.

Pulling him into an embrace, you felt his head rest against the wall, trying to reach your shoulder, but failing as he was too tall. You chuckled and began to rub his back, talking to him in an endearing tone. “You good, Carlos?”

“Yeah–yeah, I’m good.” he huffed, and soon after his response, he pulled back, standing straight as he looked down at you.

“So, was it good? For you, I mean.” He said, running a hand through his hair.

You laughed, reaching up to caress his cheek. He leaned into your touch. “It was really good. The best I’ve ever had, I’d say.”

He smiled, taking your hand from his cheek and kissing it, “It was good for me, too. Turns out I really like saving damsels-in-distress. Who knew, huh?”

You rolled your eyes at his comment. The two of you then continued your back-and-forth witty remarks, while agreeing on going to wash yourselves off quickly in the showers that were a part of the locker room you just had sex in. As you both bathed in separate stalls, you continued to talk, practically yelling over the bustling of the shower head as the water fell.You hoped no one was nearby outside, because it was likely they would have heard you.

Once finished, the two of you got dressed and grabbed your stuff. Luckily enough, the locker room that you went into was the men’s, so Carlos was able to grab his things from the locker he usually uses when on lifeguard duty.

The two of you then walked out of the building together, acting like a newlywed couple. You teased one another, laughing and joking around as you had the entire night.

Once outside, feeling the chill on your skin, you both paused, not sure where to go from there. You both didn’t really want to go your separate ways.

You desperately wanted to ask for his number, but you weren’t sure how to do so in a witty and playful way. You didn’t want to ask outright, because for some reason, even after all you just did, you worried it would come off as desperate. Even though you were desperate.

You opened your mouth to speak but was cut off by Carlos. “Hey, so, if it’s alright with you–you wouldn’t mind me asking for your number, would you?”

You giggled, happy that he was thinking of the same thing. “No, I wouldn’t mind at all. I was just thinking of asking the same thing.”

Carlos smiled, and the two of you quickly exchanged numbers. “Make sure to give me a cutesy name and contact photo.” He said playfully grinning at you.

And that gave you an idea. “Hey, why don’t we take a picture right now? That way we both get to have a cute contact photo.”

He smiled, ruffling your hair, and then let you hold your phone up, ready to take the picture.

“Cheese!” you exclaimed, and he laughed as you pressed the camera button.

After taking the photo, you sent it to him straight away. The two of you then realized it was getting late, and you couldn’t drag your time on with one another any longer. You said your goodbyes, and both went in different directions to get into your cars.

As soon as you got into your car, you started it and began to think about your night. Your cheeks blushed, and you immediately grabbed your phone. You had to tell your friends what happened.

Unsurprisingly, they all freaked out on you, exclaiming how they were wondering where you went. You laughed a little, typing out a quick summary. After hitting send, one of your friends began to ask strange questions.

“Jill: Wait, what does he look like?”

Puzzled, you typed out a relatively simple description. After a couple of minutes, your friend responded.

“Jill: Wtf I think I know him”

“Jill: He’s in my science class???”

“Jill: Dude sucks at science lmao”

You were a little taken aback by the revelation of Jill knowing Carlos, although you were a little more shocked at him sucking at science. He seemed like a science-y kinda guy.

As you continued to chat with your friends, you got a notification from Carlos. Your heartbeat quickened, and you wondered what he had to say so soon.

Upon opening the notification, you saw that what he had sent was a screenshot of your contact name and profile picture in his phone – it was the selfie the two of you took, along with the name “Damsel.”

You reply with your own screenshot, which also used the selfie the two of you took, while his name was set to “Phelps.” It didn’t take long for him to reply,

“Phelps: Hey, hasn’t anyone ever told you it’s rude to call a gentleman Phelps?”

You laughed out loud, and could already tell you’d be spending the rest of your night talking with Carlos.

Oh well. The night was still young.

For the official and original Kinktober 23 prompts, check here. Credits to @kinktober2023 for the ideas!

#carlos oliveira #carlos resident evil #carlos oliveira smut #carlos oliveira fluff #resident evil smut #resident evil fluff #resident evil #resident evil oneshot #kinktober 23 #kinktober #carlos oliveira x you #carlos oliveira x reader #instalove #pool boy #re3 remake #size difference #re fanfic #resident evil fanfiction #smut

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tarisilmarwen · 1 year ago

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Ahsoka "Dreams and Madness" Liveblog

Heeeeeeeeee.

My week has sucked, let's get into this already, this is some of the only true joy I'm deriving from life right now.

(I'm okay but legitimately, my week has sucked, lemme have this.)

HELLO CORUSCANT YOU'RE LOOKING PRETTY.

Ho daaaaayum, Hera bringing the fire to this meeting.

I am... annoyed by the emphasis on Hera as a maverick though, she was the Rebels character MOST beholden to the protocol and procedure of the hierarchy, the time she saved Kanan was the only time she ever really defied orders and dammit I have just patchworked myself my own answer okay so obviously she's normally very rule-abiding EXCEPT for times when her family and the people she cares about most need her help and no one else will give aid to her.

Curses upon my ability to iron out plot wrinkles I don't like.

Filoni must REALLY not like Xiono, he's giving him all the skeptic lines.

Course this is also one of the times the writing has to be hampered by trying to patchwork and salvage the Sequel Trilogy by explaining why the New Republic ignored the problem of the First Order until it was too late.

HI THREEPIO.

Man I am gonna cry ugly tears when we lose Antony Daniels, he loves playing Threepio so much, he's always up for it, never once complained that no one knows him from anything else.

Right so I get why they had Threepio deliver a message instead of trying to CGI frankenstein Leia into this but also Disney are cowards JUST RECAST THE MAIN TRIO I PROMISE NO ONE ACTUALLY HOLDS IT AGAINST ALDEN, TLJ JUST SUCKED AND SOLO WAS THE NEXT PRODUCT WE HAD TO TAKE THINGS OUT ON.

Seriously, the de-aging and CGI puppetry is starting to get uncomfortable and weird.

Chopper bout to throw hands in this courthouse lol.

I'm sorry, the emphasis on just how LONG this hyperspace trip is is absolutely making me reel with adoration for Ezra, he held the air inside the bridge of the Chimaera and the door closed and Thrawn in place ALL THE WAY TO PERIDEA IN ANOTHER FREAKING GALAXY.

YOUR FAVE COULD NEVER.

Loosen up a bit Rosario, you're stiff.

Oof that little bow between Ahsoka and Holo!Anakin.

Huyang begrudgingly having to remember to trust the Force lol.

Ohhhhh bastard, he put explosives in orbit to stop the purrgil!

.....Making the ring against the planet like that was supposed to be a visual reminder of the Death Star right?

The look of subtle but dawning horror in Thrawn's face when he realizes Ahsoka was Anakin's padawan lololol.

Like, "Ffffffffffffff--"

"Jedi are very good at hiding. They've been practicing that for years." Ah yes, excellent, another moment/quote I can add to my collection of "Thrawn barely containing his seething loathing of Ezra" bits lol.

*perks* Oh? Are we at the interesting parts now?

Ahhhh yes the minivan convoy with mom and dad Sabezra at the front.

There should have been waaaaaay more infodumping in this conversation, I need Ezra to boggle over everything.

Sabine still avoiding the question, but lol at Ezra's "The usual level [of complicated] or worse?" that's so cute.

THEIR BANTER IS ADORABLE I AM PILLOWING MYSELF IN IT AND MAKING A BLANKET FORT.

FRICK THIS IS PERFECT.

Ugh and he doesn't push her to talk about it, he's still so considerate of her armor and walls.

Someone, maybe multiple someones commented that they could see serious Two Towers aesthetics in this and... yeah no this is super LOTR-esque.

Lars Mikkelson continuing to kill it with his performance, as basic as it is.

[SIGHS HEAVILY AT THE CONTINUING INSISTENCE ON MAKING SABINE FORCE SENSITIVE] Okay, Filoni, whatever.

I'm ignoring this, I'm pretending she reached out to Ezra instead.

"Took me in when I really needed help." Ohhhhh do not do that, do not plant hurt/comfort ideas in my head ghgkasuhfkauhf.

He is so softly concerned about her aaaaahhhhhh.

I saw a few people confused by Baylan basically abandoning Shin to things here when he was acting so fond of her last episode so let me maybe shed some light on that situation. Ahem:

THE DARK SIDE DESIRE FOR POWER SLOWLY CONSUMES YOU UNTIL IT IS OVERWHELMING, UNTIL WHAT YOU WANTED THE POWER FOR NO LONGER MATTERS. THAT'S ITS NATURE THAT'S WHAT IT DOES. BECOMES MORE AND MORE OF AN OBSESSION UNTIL IT'S ALL YOU CARE ABOUT.

So yes, Baylan chucking Shin out to find her destiny or whatever because whatever it is that he's trying to seize power from is making him completely overlook her feelings.

"If Lord Baylan proves capable..." LOLOLOL BAYLAN DECIDED TO SCREW THAT NOISE HE'S IN IT FOR HIMSELF MY MAN.

GUNSHIPS! GUUUUUNSHIIIIIIIPS!

Ezra can't leave the one crashed one, awwwwww.

Frick, him being the Noti's protector is just so frigging cute. I need fluff fics.

I'M GONNA DIE FROM THIS BANTER, IT'S ADORABLE.

Battle Couple Sabezra now? Y/Y?

Baylan's whole demeanor is changing, it's like he's soaking up the Dark Side energy of this place. Once again, awed by Ray Stevenson's sheer presence. The man feels massive and he's just standing there.

LOLOL THIS WHOLE ARGUMENT OVER THE "OUR" LIGHTSABER.

I'm grinning.

But also I wanna see Ezra hold his lightsaber again, pretty please?

Ahsoka doing much better now that she has both her blades this time.

*pillows hands* Can I watch Ezra forever please. I missed you son. Never leave me again.

HUYAAAAAAAAANG! :D

Oh man, how much dread and chagrin do you think Ezra had when he saw the stormtroopers?

Ho ho Thrawn looks eager for this.

SQUEEEEEEEEEEE.

(They are this close to holding hands you guys.)

This is probably giving Ezra flashblacks.

Oh sue me I want some angst and whump and pain to have happened in the interim.

Ahsoooooookkaaaaaaaaaaa! :D

Oh for, please stop using the beskar as literal plot armor. It sucks a lot of danger out of the fight.

Thrawn being all Xanatos Gambit like the pro he is.

Shin looking like she might cry, oh wow actual emotions.

FRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIICCCCKKK THAT ADORABLE LITTLE LAUGH.

Oh gosh, don't jinx it don't jinx it don't jinx it...

Wheeeeeeeeee that was... fun, actually!

The Sabezra bits were adorable. I have quibbles here and there but I'm just so happy being Sabine being happy and content and seeing Ezra being... Ezra.

Nervous for the last ep though. Hhhgnghhhhh I am very much stressed and I do not wish to be.

#star wars #ahsoka show #spoilers #liveblog #ezra bridger #grand admiral thrawn #sabezra

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mera-k1 · 9 months ago

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continuing with the whole situation of kanata being inexperienced...

aw, poor guy. he's wouldn't know what to do, like, actually, what is he SUPPOSED to do? lololol. he's so cute when he's like that, clearly worried but not really knowing the cause of your discomfort bc is supposed to feel good! he may be asks what is wrong or if you're okay? he could feel guilty about it, but not really expressing it, like, verbally. he even hesitates to continue cause, what if he hurt you again? i love him so much 😭😭

he's honestly just such a secret sweetheart... he probably refuses to continue because he hurt you! like no matter what you say, he isn't gonna listen. he wants to do his own research just to make sure that it was... you know, normal.. i'm sure the only thing he really knew about sex was that he should put his dick in you (to put it bluntly.) so your first time with him might be held off for a little while after that

#♡ thirsts ♡#kanata yatonokami x reader #kanata smut

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dcviated · 1 month ago

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crimmas holiday prompts :: open!!

send a symbol/prompt for seasonal events

@cloudpools sent: ✧ — [Blythe] bumps into [Gurin] under mistletoe ((Do either of them even know what mistletoe means? Idk! Lololol BUT ITD BE CUTE

A foray into the manor of Zeyrfial Sorovan, feared and respected archdemon of the underbureaus... you wouldn't expect it to be so gaudy, would you? Gurin sure didn't. Not many have the opportunity to visit here, let alone trespass, so facts are murky and rumors are high. Gold tiles and mirror-like floors with streams of water and, of course, towering bookcases. Yes, Gurin saw some of that but. Uh. Who the hell put up all these human decorations?

Certainly not an eccentric lawyer who bartered with time.

Bits and bobs. Garlands. Sparkling lights. Clippings from evergreen trees. It's ... well, he's only tangentially involved in aesthetics himself, but it's not ... ehh... too offensive? Not to his senses anyway, but the concern borne of the stochastic environs compounds with his own unease being here.

An envoy from Ukolai. Zeyrfial used a store of magical focuses just like anyone else, if only to ... uh... something about extensions to his own capability? He's not supposed to need to say too much. Fortunately. Pitching to the other fiends is one thing, but an archdemon of this caliber is another.

Not to mention. That other thing. Just the little one. Itty bitty. Not a problem, but certainly a concern. One he figured he was bound to run into at some point, while being guided through by the nebulous water familiars or whatever they were upon arrival.

Gurin runs into Blythe in between the entry and the east wing corridor. Well, almost, an extended hand catches her before anything too dramatic can take place. The demon snorts in amusement, relief, and tension.

"Whoooa there- Blythe. Blythe!! Tch well maybe I do have some kind of luck to me." He bites back negative connotation to the remark before it can slip free. Letting relief instead soften his expression as the human girl smiles and lights up at his appearance. "We got a way of surprising each other, don't we? So.... what? What's the matter?"

Blythe doesn't seem to have relaxed in turn, not even to her fidgeting nervous nature he'd come to expect. No, she was looking... up. Eh? Gurin follows the gaze, a strange sprig of another piece of greenery hanging above them. A small red ribbon. It was cute, but... kinda random, wasn't it?

"U-h... uhm... mm... mmmmm!!" Blythe's face begins to tint in rose at the cheeks, and eyes dash away from Gurin's own questioning gaze once it drops back down to her.

"What?? What's the deal here??" His hands grip her shoulders, looking about with a growing panic (so much for that relief). When she does turn back, her lips are pursing. Eyes drifting closed and... she's leaning up? "UH... Blythe please. Tell me what're you doing?" Voice is dropping to a hissed whisper. This is really bad, couldn't Zeyrfial himself show up at any point in all this?

"We... don't you know we have to kiss now...? S-so..." She blinks innocently, almost pleading in expression before she half resumes that posturing of her lips. Now it's Gurin's turn to light up. Gold-tinted skin finding it's own rosy pigments. Have to what? KISS?!

"WHAT?!"

She's FUCKING WITH HIM. She HAS TO BE.

#cloudpools #inbox :: answered ic #muse :: gurin #the idea struck me and I couldn't stop myself

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peachyproserpina · 4 years ago

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Silk Shorts

Blaise (Del Taco Guy) X Fem!Plus size! Reader

TW: oral m receiving, anxiety, crying, weight mention, self harm, crying, yelling, dry heaving, vomiting, self hate, insecurities, clothes shopping, daddy kink, body worship, angst with fluff

If I miss a tag please let me know!

Blaise is the beautiful brain child of @glassbxttless who is spoiling me and letting me write for her AU. This was only supposed to be a cute little blurb and now it's a 4000 word brain child. Please enjoy this, it was super cathartic to write.

He’s heard you sigh for what feels like the fith time today, and jesus, he fucking loves you but it’s starting to get on your nerves. It’s barely noon and you're all spread out on the carpet in his office floor. Wearin that cute pink nighty set he’s seen you in and out of a million times by now. He watches your shoulders tense up and he just knows you’re about to let out ANOTHER sigh and he snaps his laptop shut a little too loud making you jump. Looking over your shoulder at him behind his desk all guilty.

“Sorry Daddy.” It’s a half assed apology but he can see that you’re still holding that tension in your shoulders. Blaise raises an eyebrow at you as he lights up a cigarette and pats his lap, wanting you to cuddle up to him. You shake your head and go back to lookin at your phone. He doesn’t like being told no, even if it’s coming from you. Especially when he can feel you too much in your own head. You’ve been together for a year now and he knows you, the whole emotions and ‘i love you’ part is pretty new to you both but he knows when you’re worrying over something just as much as you know the moment he calls you without a text or steps in the door he's had a shit day. “Honey, you know better.”

He exhales and watches the way you twist to look over to him again, admiring the way the little lacy shorts get eaten up by your big thighs and the way that soft patch of stomach can be seen when you’re all relaxed like this. He feels his cock stir in his pants and he palms it. Willing it to wait until he knows what exactly is going on.

You’re caught, you knew you should have stayed out of his office, but he’s been on the other side of the country and the big apartment he got for you is well… Too big, without him there smoking and taking up all the room and fucking you full every half hour. You worry your lip between your teeth and you get yourself up, cringing when you feel the way your thighs jiggle and your tits move when you walk over to him. Now that he’s home you don't wanna be away from him but you’ve been trying to go clothes shopping and it’s never a pretty endeavor. With the way you’re built and the way you’re bigger than most it feels like a fruitless impossible task, nothing ever fits right, if they have your size it's only online, and you can’t even try it on to make sure it does fit right! Let alone if you want something cute you have to pay an arm and a leg for it. Not that you couldn’t just ask Blaise for some extra cash, but as silly as it is, you don’t wanna bother him for it. Because if you tell him what it’s for he’ll wanna come with and that's a whole other thing.

Blaise sees the way you’re stuck in your own head and you get comfortable between his outstretched legs, you squish a cheek against his thigh, you’re so fucking close to his cock he might lose his mind. He takes a good look at you and the app you have open on your phone and when he sees the flashing lights for an ad “20% off when you sign up!” and the rows and rows of dresses he cocks his head again. Stubbing out his cigarette he wraps one of those big warm palms around your jaw and gives you a little shake, causing you to look up at him all starry eyed.

“You need some new clothes baby?” He asks, hand still wrapped around your jaw, making you pout in the cutest way. He watches your eyes flick down before meeting his and you nod just a little bit. You’re anxious, he can feel it beat off you in waves and you are biting your cheek, he can feel the way you're going at it through your cheek. You’ve never been shy to ask him for money before, for anything, not that you asked him for all that much before anyway, just to help you cover tuition and ubers, the occasional nail appointment. Now that he’s thinking about it he doesn’t know if you’ve ever asked him for clothes money, and now that he’s thinking real hard about it he’s trying to remember the last time he’s seen you in something new. He was usually too preoccupied with taking your clothes off to really notice, but it’s been a year now and even when he takes you out it’s usually the same rotation of those cute lil club dresses with different shoes. He feels like an idiot for not picking up on this sooner, you’re his girl, you’ve been his baby since he laid eyes on you. But you’ve got him so drunk on your kitty and wrapped so tight around your finger he didn’t pick up on this.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” He’s pulling you up closer to his crotch, and now he can see down your shirt and there’s not stopping his cock from getting hard now. You slip out of his grasp and lick your lips as you start to work his belt off, it’d be impossible to not notice how hard he was. You work his slacks down and press feather light kisses over his clothed cock before pushing your face down hard and starts working his briefs down as well. You wrap your lips around the head of his cock and he hisses while you give him those fucking puppy dog eyes that he knows is going to kill him one of these days. You work him deeper into your mouth and let out a noncommittal hum, Blaise drops his head back against his chair when you do that and groans. You’re nestled against the base of him now and he’s fucking panting, you’re sooo fucking tight for him, it doesn’t matter how many times he fucks your throat raw, you’re always sooo tight and- ”Fucking perfect sugar. Make me cum then we’ll get you dressed and hit the town.” He feels you freeze for a moment before you fondle his balls in that way only you do and he’s gone again.

You’re really nervous, you’re nervous when you get dressed, opting for something you can slip in and out of easily. You’re nervous when Blaises kisses you nice and deep, basically tonguing your tonsils while you both wait for his car. You’re especially nervous when you’re pulling up to the mall, you’ve never been to this mall before, knowing they probably don't carry your size in any of these stores. You’re trying to let on too much, Blaise actually looked excited for this, excited to go out with you, excited to ‘have such easy fuckin access to you Princess.’ But you can’t feel much beyond this dread you always get and how sweaty your palms are. Blaise helps you out of the car before you tuck your arm into his and follow into what might as well be your funeral.

The mall is, well a mall, no matter how many name brand and designer stores are crammed into it you’ll always be able to smell the pretzel place and there’s always some teens who should probably be in school around. You let Blaise lead the way, he can’t remember the last time he took someone shopping, must have been years ago, when he first started doing what he’s doin, when he finally got some money in his name and wanted to impress whoever was nearby. He’s chatting your ear off while he walks you into the first clothing store he sees. It’s chic, trendy, all neutral colors and boxy patterns. You walk around the store with Blaise at your side trying to fight off the rising panic in your gut, nothing is going to fit and Blaise is gonna finally realize you’re too fat for him and leave you. Even after he got that tattoo just for you, even after he’s whispered all those ‘I love you's' into your hair when he thinks you’re asleep.

You pick at some of the clothes, flipping over the tags and making faces. Blaise chalks it up to the fact nothing in this store looks like much your style and you’re thankful for when he kisses his spot on your neck and whisks you out of there and on a quest for something more your style. You’re in and out of what feels like 10 stores, with nothing more than some jewelry he caught you eyeing and asked him for. He tisked you but bought it for you, making you promise you’ll pick out some clothes once you find something you like. You’re on the other side of the mall by now and he feels you lag when you both pass by a lingerie store, nothing too gaudy or cheap in the windows. He knows expensive when he sees it and the lacework on the sets on display are just that. He’s watching your reaction, your eyes are darting over a lacy peachy set and he's imaging you in that set and he’s getting hard again. Leading you inside the store he feels you stiffen right before you both enter and he chalks it up to the wave of jasmine that wafts out when he opens the door for you.

Swallowing your nerves you enter the store you’ve been dreaming of going to for years, knowing damn well you wont fit into anything here, you’ve done the research, they don’t carry anything above a size 5 here and you’re trying not to cry as you walk in. You’re both greeted with a happy trill of a hello and she gives you the once over you’ve gotten your whole life, the once over that means ‘there's no way she can fit into anything in here’ you make your way into the belly of the beast.

Blaise is watching your intently, you can feel it and he knows you can, he knows you want something from this store and if he has to buy one of everything for you he is going to. All he wants to do is fucking spoil you like you deserve and he also maybe, might want to cum all over those pretty red shorts you’re feeling in between your finger tips. He steps up behind you and you jump a little when he nuzzles into your neck. His hands are trailing up your thighs, over your arms and feeling the silk between his fingers while letting out a little hum. You relax back into his chest, and press a kiss next to his Adam's apple. “I wanna see you in these baby, also wanna cover them in my cum after I tear through them to get to your juicy cunt.”

You gasp and turn around, your cheeks are heating up in embarrassment, not only for Blaise being so crass out in public, not that you expected anything less, but also because you know he’s never going to be able to see you in these. You press a hand to his chest and another to your cheek trying to stop and settle yourself.

“Daddy! You can’t say things like that in public.” You tap his chest for emphasis and roll your eyes when he gives you that look he always does before he eats you out for hours.

“Aw, you two are so cute! Shopping for your wife today sir?” The store attendant has managed to sneak up behind the both of you while Blaise was whispering filth in your ear. Blaise stiffens at the mention of a wife and shoots a glare at the attendant,

“Excuse me?” he turns fully to the attendant and she shrinks once he’s no longer crouching over you, you’re hiding behind him now, not wanting to deal with this just- wanting to go home. You know she’s about to say something stupid and you know you might have to pull Blaise out of here by the back of his suit jacket. She looks ashamed enough but she asks again-

“Are you two shopping for your wife today sir?” She gestures to you who is hanging onto Blaises arm, not only for your sake but also hers, Blaise runs a hand through his hair and you can see his shoulders tense.

“Do you see a ring on my finger? Do I look like im fucking married to you?” Blaise’s voice is starting to raise and the attendant takes a step back, raising her hands up in front of her, trying to diffuse the situation.

“No, sir I'm sorry- I just thought. You, she was your daughter you see.” Blaise goes stock still and you worry your lip between your teeth, you can feel the way he’s getting angry, you can see the way the red is creeping up over his turtle neck and into his face. He takes one big step forward and points at her.

“Now you listen here, she is not my daughter. Do I look old enough to have a daughter her age? You’ve got a fine fuckin establishment here and I don’t want to cause any fucking trouble so why don’t you get a fucking dressing room started for us and one of everything in her size.” He gestures to you during the last bit and you start to panic in full force. The attendant does that once over you’ve been getting at every store you’ve been into today and you know exactly what the next words out of her mouth are going to be.

“I- I can get that room started sir, but we don’t carry anything in her size.” She at least has the decency to look scared when she says it and Blaise blows up on her then.

“What the FUCK do you mean you don’t carry anything in her size? What like it’s fucking hard to do so?” He picks up those shorts you were eyeing and looks at the price. “You have the fucking nerve to charge four hundred and eighty fuckin’ dollars for a pair of shorts and you can’t carry them in my baby’s fucking size? What kind of bullshit is that?” He keeps going and you’re tugging on his sleeve, trying to get him out of the store, trying so fucking hard to not let these tears that have been building up all day finally spill over in public like this. Blaise is in full swing now, asking questions, and hounding this poor woman to death, digging his cell phone out of his pocket to start making calls, because he has a fucking number for every situation and apparently this is one of those.

“Can we just go?” You’re trying to get his attention, embarrassed and needing to go home before more of a scene can be made. The attendant has gone ghost white as he lays into her and this whole store and you just leave, you can feel the tears start to slip and you need to be out of this fucking awful jasmine induced nightmare so you can breathe. You make your way out of the store while you can feel the tears track down your face, knowing you look like a mess while leggy blondes and brunettes with arms full of bags point, whisper, giggle, behind their hands at you while you try to find the closest fucking place to cry. Closest fucking place to maybe drown yourself and never have to fucking go through this again, never have anyone ever have to deal with this again. You see a restroom and hurry to it, thanking whoever was listening that it was just a single room, no stalls, no way for anyone else to come in and hear you cry yourself sick yet again.

You shut the door behind you and lock it tight before you’re curling in on yourself, sobs tearing out of your chest while you try to hold it together. You didn’t want to do this, you knew it was going to be a fucking disaster. It always is, it’;s easier to stay home and order whatever online and hope it fits. You’re fucking fat and there’s no changing it, you pinch your thighs till you feel the sting of blood bubble to the surface, these fucking thighs that you hate, that make it impossible to fit into skirts, dresses, pants. You’re trying to muffle your cries as you drag your nails up up up over your stomach, round and big, and awful. You know you’re not worth his love of affection, worth anyone's love of affection with a body like this. You watch the red welts bloom from where you’ve dragged your nails angrily over your skin and you sob so hard you feel like you might throw up.

You’re so caught up in your self tirade of hate that you haven’t even noticed the banging on the bathroom door, haven’t heard the panicked yells of Blaise on the other side, he’s never heard you cry like this before and his blood is running cold thinking it’s his fault, thinking he’s made such a scene, embarrassed you so much he’s caused you to cry. He gives up on getting you to open the door before he’s trying to knock it down. It takes a good three times before he’s kicked the door in and he sees you and his heart breaks then and there. You’re dry heaving into the toilet, face puffy and eyes red from crying, he can see the little drops of blood running down your thighs and the way your top is rucked up with the welts peaking through.

“Princess. Comere.” He goes to pick you up and you hold your hand up, stopping him in his tracks, shaking your head back and forth as you try not to vomit in front of him. You look over at him start crying all fresh, you can see how fucking scared he looks, how concerned he is for you and it makes you sick to your stomach.

“Just, go home Blaise.” your voice is hoarse from all the crying and you're mumbling it more into the toilet then to him. His heart breaks at that, he won’t just leave you and he loves it when you say his name. But he never wanted to hear it like this, hear it between hiccups of sadness instead of pleasure like you usually say it.

“I’m not just going to leave you baby-” he takes a step closer and kneels down on the tile with you, you let out a huff and roll your eyes, mumbling a quiet ‘you should’. He hears it and places a hand on your back, you tense up and he almost takes it back before he thinks twice, knowing how much you love, need, want, beg him to always touch you. “I didn’t catch that honey.” You let out a sigh before you look over at him properly.

“Just, leave now Blaise. Leave me now and go get that tattoo covered up and find someone actually worth your time. Because I’m not.” You husked out, throat raw hoarse. How you manage to have fresh tears running down your face is beyond your comprehension, but they’re there and he’s wiping them away as fast as they come.

“Why would I do that bunny? I love you to death.” You stiffen at the admission and worry your lip between your teeth.

“I’m just not, I -” you struggle to find the words that have been in the back of your mind and the tip of your tongue since you started this arrangement. “I’m too fat for you Blaise, you need to be with some supermodel, teeny tiny Instagram influencer, someone who can fit into all the shit you wanna buy em. Not someone like me who ends up shopping at fucking second hand stores and Wal-Mart.” It feels good to get the thought out that you’ve been harboring this whole time, it’s like breaking a fever, ripping off a bandaid, it stings and hurts now but it’s better for everyone involved to know the truth.

This whole tirade Blaise has been listening, but he doesn’t know if he’s ever felt more lost in his life. He has no fucking clue what you’re going on about, he has never once thought about leaving you from the moment you wrapped your lips around his cock. He never once thought you were fat, he was always so caught up in the way you looked under and over him and how fucking hard you make him cum to think about anything other then how much he loves all of you. He pulls you in tight to his chest and presses kisses to the top of your head while you dig your fingers into him and cry anew. He sits and waits for you to finish, or the hiccups to stop, for your breathing to get heavy and slow, even. He pulls back cradling your face between his palms before pressing a tiny kiss to your lips. You close your eyes and enjoy his touch, committing it to memory, figuring it’s going to be the last.

“Your brain is too big for its own good, ya know that sweets?” Blaise breaks the silence in the bathroom with that and you feel like this afternoon hasn’t been real. You look up at him all puzzled, lost as to where he’s gotten that thought. You go to ask him about it before he shushes you with a tender kiss. “Baby, I- you’re not fat.” You roll your eyes and give him a look that almost makes him feel sheepish. He squishes your cheeks together making you pout before pressing kisses all over your face.

“Okay, yes you are fat. But that doesn’t change the fact I'm in love with you.” He laces his fingers together at the back of your neck and keeps eye contact with you. “I don’t give a fuck how much you weigh or what size you are. I love you, every single fucking part of you. I love the way you feel when you cuddle up with me. I adore the way you feel under my hands, I love the fact I can rest my head on you and feel comfortable. I-” he’s getting lost in the thought of the first time you trapped him between your pillowy thighs and he’s getting hard. You can feel him getting hard under you and you huff out a breath. You go to pull away and he’s pulled back to the present. He tightens his grip and focuses back on you.

“You’re not too fat for me. I don’t want anyone but you, I will never want anyone but you.” He says it with such conviction it makes you start to tear up again, finally, maybe, believing him a little. “Sorry for dragging you out here love, I should have picked up on the fact you didn’t want to come.” You shake your head and press a kiss to his palm.

“It’s okay. Can we just go home?” you plead, Blaise nods, helping you up and sending a text for his driver to be ready by the doors ASAP. Once your home Bliase sheds you out of your clothes before laying you down in the middle of his big bed and kissing what must be every fucking inch of your skin, paying close and tender attention to the spots where you dug your nails in deep enough to bleed. He’s never been this soft to you and before you both know it you’re out like a light, exhausted from all the emotions.

It’s not even a week later when someone rings the bell to your apartment, you buzz them in, figuring it’s one of your friends stopping by to say hi or needing help with homework. It’s not until there's a knock and you answer the door and what has got to be a small army of delivery people with so many packages you’re getting dizzy. You direct them to the living room, and they’re piling up and you’re starting to freak out a little. It isn’t until you see Blaise’s driver with a little envelope addressed to “Baby” in his chicken scratch. You thank him and sit on the counter opening the letter.

“Baby girl,

I know last week was rough on you. I went ahead and ordered you some stuff, well I sent my stylist out and ordered you some stuff to your measurements. I know that this doesn’t fix everything but I hope it’s a start and as soon as I’m home I will make sure you know just how much I love you and how perfect you are.”

#blaise x reader #peachy writes #blaise x plus size reader #plus size reader #tw daddy kink #tw crying #tw self half #tw selfhate #tw angst #angst and fluff #tw vomit #LOLOLOL THIS WAS JUST SUPPOSED TO BE A CUTE LITTLE THING

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ohmykazuha · 3 years ago

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♡ darling, i'm a cat!

♡ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: itto, childe, zhongli, diluc, xiao, aether, scaramouche, thoma x gn!reader

♡ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: fluff <3

♡ 𝐚/𝐧: darling catboys! the men of genshin wake up and find out that they've grown cat tails and cat ears. i thought this was really cute. <3 | please like/rb if you liked this!

ITTO is embarrassed, how's he supposed to fight kujou sara?! this is stupid, and he hates it! sigh... he really only accepts it when you tell him that you like it, and he lets you pat his head. it's actually quite cute, and they're fuzzy as well. black-brown cat ears and tail sprout from the two ends! he gets more cuddly over this period of time as well.. cat natures? he does end up knocking some stuff off the tables, but it's okay. it's really adorable. there's a lot of cuddling after that and definitely a lot of headpats going on. but he enjoys it anyways, so its a win-win!

CHILDE is kind of shocked, but he gets over it pretty quickly! he just lives and vibes with it, to be honest. childe lets you play with his ears and tail, and sometimes his tail curls around you when the two of you cuddle. it's quite sweet, really. he doesn't mind you playing with his new features and taking photos of it to keep as memories, but archons forbid Scaramouche or La Signora find out about it. he would simply pass away if his reputation as a dangerous harbinger got tarnished, no? but he allows himself to let a little looser around you, though. it's really very cute!

ZHONGLI is a tad embarrassed – but he really doesn't mind it. he just finds ways to live with it, you know? as a mortal, he doesn't really care since his status as an ex-archon isn't known by a lot of people, so there's truly not much of a high reputation to tarnish. he's quite alright with the cat ears and tails, and he likes how happy you are when you play with them. he enjoys headpats as well, so be sure to give him loads of them! he enjoys kisses on the tips of his ears sometimes. heheheh. it's really cool because you get to see him act a little looser because of this. 10/10 recommend, hu tao loves seeing him like that. she thinks it's hilarious!

DILUC is close to crying – he won't cry in front of you– but he'd definitely sulk about it for a few days. like the grumpy cat he is, he'd take a few days to mood around but he'd let you play with it! he honestly tries to pretend that it doesn't affect him that much, but you know that he genuinely doesn't like it. XD you do take a lot of photos though! he lets you play with his ears and tail, and would definitely indulge you in cuddles and things like that. it's really very cute and it's nice seeing diluc act a little looser and less uptight – even if it was caused by a strange mishap. XD he would probably wear a hat to cover his ears or something. lololol.

XIAO is embarrassed, and for the first few days, he wouldn't leave Wangshu Inn. not even to fight anything. he gets really embarrassed and pretty much prays to rex lapis that you would leave him alone so that you wouldn't have to see him in such a vulnerable state. however, after a few days, he kind of decides that it's not so bad! you get to cuddle him, he gets headpats, and he takes the chance to be a little more affectionate around you. xiao wouldn't admit it, but he likes how this situation allows him to be more cuddly around you; something he wouldn't usually do usually >< it's very very cute!

AETHER is shocked, but rolls with it! he's a tad confused as to why this is happening, and he definitely complains once or twice because sitting down feels strange now! but he truly doesn't mind, because he gets to see your happy face when you get to pat his eats or play with his fuzzy tail. it's worth it when he sees the childlike smile on your face, transporting you back to memories of playing with the cats in the neighbourhood when you have to pinch yourself and remind yourself that this is your boyfriend. honestly, aether doesn't really mind the feline-like features after a few days. he finds it really cool and even shows it off!

SCARAMOUCHE swears that he hates it, but you've seen him smile in the mirror, glancing at his new features. he grumbles and grumbles about it, swearing that he might cut it off if it doesn't go away by next week, but you notice the steps he takes to take extra care of his... uh... added features. he sits on cushions so he wouldn't hurt his tail and purposely shifts his hat so it doesn't get into the way of his cat ears. it's quite adorable, really – how he seems to like it. just like childe, he purposely makes sure that the photos of him are locked in a place inaccessible to childe and la signora. if they found out... he doesn't dare think, only shudder at the very thought of the taunts and playful jeers. but it's really very cute.

THOMA is a bit grumpy since a lot of his co-workers at kamisato estate seem to be very amused with his new features, but he ends up living with it, honestly. he entertains the kids in inazuma with it, and it's really very very cute! he tries to play games with them and of course, you end up taking loads of pictures to keep the memories and as keepsakes. it's adorable. thoma genuinely doesn't mind the feline-like additions – it just affects his reputation, not his physical activities. you make sure to give him loads and loads of headpats and cuddles to make up for the shock, and surprisingly, his tail wraps around you! it's super cute. 10/10 recommend.

pls pls pls give this love i spent so much time on it TuT i'll write a part 2 of this with others if people want! totally sfw. | like and reblog if you want to support me and liked this!

taglist: @bookuya, @mikachuchu, @starglitterz, @cherubbic, @noirkkat, @the-gayest-sky-kid, @ajaxeology, @icecappa, @almondoufu, @gnyuvile, @yeetmeoffjueyunkarst. @simplyxsinned, @heaven-dissolution, @xiaoyksa, @yua1106, @cruxdou, @mayple, @rim0na, @kamitoge, @abyssheart, @hushyouu, @thaliastea, @chichikoi, @cxlrose, @xiaos-tofuu, @yuezhong, @kall-me-dreamer, @myluvkeiji, @melkxsh, @haliya-mori

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musclesandhammering · 3 years ago

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“Sylki isn’t even a m/f pairing cause they’re both genderfluid!”

↘️ I really really wanted Loki to be canon genderfluid, but the problem with that is that in Ep 5, they do everything in their power to make both Loki and Sylvie seem Very Very cis. All the Loki’s straight up say they’ve never seen a female version of themselves, and Sylvie says that she was born a woman (and never shows any sign of presenting as anything else). Even if Ep 5 hadn’t happened, though, the only mention of anything gender-related is a little Easter egg in Loki’s file that says “Sex: Fluid”. Easily missed by a casual viewer, so not much confirmation at all.

“You’re biphobic if you have a problem with Sylki!”

↘️ Putting aside the fact that I’m actually bi myself… In real life, it’s totally valid for a bisexual person to only date the opposite sex, but on screen “Show, don’t tell.” is the golden rule. There are plenty of problems with Sylki other than the fact that it’s a m/f ship. However, it’s extremely frustrating for queer people to see the writers patting themselves on the back for giving us one (1) throwaway line that can be easily edited out for homophobic audiences, and then to see absolutely no further acknowledgment of Loki’s supposed attraction to men, along with him being shown openly flirting with 2 different women. It just seems awfully convenient to be able to tell and not show where m/m is concerned and then to show m/f where it isn’t even necessary.

“You just hate that a woman got in the way of your two white dudes kissing!”

↘️ If Sylvie was the main character and she had pretty good chemistry with a woman, and then all of a sudden a male variant of her was introduced and a romance was forced between them, I’d be pretty pissed about that too. I don’t want Sylvie out of the picture! My ideal scenario would be her and Loki being Chaos Twins. And I don’t even want Lokius to be canon! Again, my ideal scenario would be Chaos Twins with their best friend/handler Mobi. This isn’t about her getting in the way of another pairing, it’s about how this pairing in particular is just Not It.

“You just want Loki for yourself, you’d be mad at anyone he was paired with!”

↘️ No I… really don’t? I’m gonna get mauled for saying this, but I don’t even find Loki particularly attractive. Tom? Sure. But Loki? Mmmm… not exactly. Aesthetically pleasing maybe. Intellectually I know that he’s pretty hot, but he doesn’t do anything for me :/ I also really really hate reader inserts sooo yeah lol. And if you’ve seen my blog you’d know I ship him with a lot of people, both male and female.

“Sylvie is her own person so it’s not really selfcest!”

↘️ Except the writers have gone out of their way to make it clear that they are the same person. Not exactly the same, but they’re similar enough that it’s clear that they’re versions of each other. Plus they canonically have the same parents, very very similar DNA, and essentially the same basic origin (adopted, Asgard, etc). They’re not exact clones of one another but they very much are slightly different models of the same person.

“Selfcest isn’t the same as incest!”

↘️ No, it’s even worse lmao. Imagine two people that share parents, DNA, and some life experiences, but they’re even closer than twins…. Lol yeah.

“Ok but you gotta admit selfcest is pretty in character for Loki lololol”

↘️ No it’s not… One of my favourite things about Loki in all 6 movies is that he never had a love interest. Never even a hint of a love interest. And even in this show he makes it clear that he’s never really been in love before- never had anything “real”. And, this considered, people saying that it makes sense that his first and only canon love interest would be a version of himself implies that he’s incredibly narcissistic. Which, despite what some shitty writers try to tell us, he’s not. His narcissism is performative. It’s posturing. He’s incredibly insecure and self-loathing and that ends up manifesting as violence in some instances, and that’s his whole problem. The exact opposite of narcissism. Quite honestly, Loki would never trust or even like himself enough to be romantically interested.

“You just want Loki whump, you hate to see him happy!”

↘️ I do enjoy Loki whump on occasion, but at this point we maxed out on the whump meter about 3 movies back… I absolutely want this poor man to be happy, for once in his damn life. And the show gives us everything but that. Just like people said Ragnarok gave us a happy Loki, when in reality all we got was a humiliated Loki that was beaten down even further to build other characters up and give the audience a laughs… which is pretty much exactly what’s happening here. Not all the time! There’s some super progressive moments for his character development and mental health, but overall? The show isn’t giving us a happy Loki at all, and Sylki definitely hasn’t resulted in a happier Loki so far.

“They have great chemistry though!”

↘️ I’m sure any two characters could have good chemistry if the writing team put 85% percent of their effort for the whole show into squishing a man and woman together and making them kiss, even going so far as to build the plot around it, when they could’ve spent their time and energy improving other aspects of the series.

“Ok you have to admit the blanket scene was pretty cute!”

↘️ Yes, I will admit that! It was adorable actually! But given the myriad of issues I listed above, one cute scene isn’t enough to make me hate the ship any less.

#an anti sylki response handbook #anti sylki #anti sylvie #to an extent #it’s not even really anti sylvie but I know her stans are gonna burn me at the stake if I don’t tag it #loki series negativity #loki spoilers #anti loki series #loki series spoilers #lokius #kinda but not rly cause I don’t even ship them in canon #in fanworks absolutely but do I want it canon? nah #anyway…#I’ll just leave this here and go #wanna also say that if you ship sylki then great! good for you #this is just an extensive list of reasons as to why I don’t #and also why the commen pro s*lki arguments don’t work for me

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the-himawari · 3 years ago

Text

A3! Mikage Hisoka - Translation [SR] Brilliance of Blooming (2/2)

*Please read disclaimer on blog; default name set as Izumi

---

Izumi: Can we start the stream, Hisoka-kun?

Hisoka: Yeah. …I’m a little sleepy though.

Izumi: D-do your best to stay awake! But a guest is going to drop in halfway, right?

Hisoka: Apparently.

Izumi: Alright, let’s start the stream then.

-pause-

Hisoka: …

Comment: “Hisoka-kun!”

Comment: “Hey there~”

Hisoka: …Ah, it’s started already. Hello. Can you see…?

Comment: “We can see!”

Comment: “His gestures are cute haha”

Comment: “Did you just wake up?”

Hisoka: No, I’m wide awake.

Comment: “Do your best!”

Comment: “I can’t wait to see what you’re gonna do!”

Hisoka: As for what I’m going to do today, I tried choosing from all of your requests.

Comment: “I wrote a request!”

Comment: “What are you gonna do?”

Hisoka: When I read your requests, there were a lot of people who said they wanted to know more about me—. So I thought I’d introduce some different things I like.

Comment: “I’m dying to know!”

Comment: “You like marshmallows, don’t you?”

Hisoka: Yeah, I love marshmallows. Thanks for remembering. Today, I’m going to introduce things apart from that.

Izumi: Your guest is here!

Hisoka: …Ah. It sounds like my guest is here. …Come on, join me.

???: And… there. That was heavier than I thought.

Comment: “Who is it?”

Comment: “That’s a huge box lolol”

Yuki: Phew.

Comment: “No way, Yuki-kun!?”

Hisoka: Today’s guest for the project.

Yuki: It’s Summer troupe’s Rurikawa Yuki. Hey there.

Comment: “Hello, Yuki-kun!”

Comment: “All we could see at first was the box lol”

Hisoka: Yuki… what’s with that giant box?

Yuki: What, you ask. I brought this over for you. Didn’t you hear from Arisu?

Hisoka: I only heard that you were coming.

Yuki: Geez. Even though I told him to make sure to tell you the details too.

Hisoka: But that’s for me, huh… What’s inside?

Yuki: Something you like. Hurry up and open it.

Hisoka: ! Oh, it is. I feel bad that it’s stuffed in a box though.

*ruffles*

Comment: “What could it be?”

Comment: “It’s a plushie!”

Hisoka: This is… something that I like. It’s a penguin plushie named Penpen. We’ve always been together ever since I got him from Itaru way back.

Comment: “Adorable!”

Hisoka: But how? Penpen was supposed to be in my room.

Yuki: Arisu gave him to me. He told me to bring him over as a special guest.

Hisoka: Without my permission… Well, it’s fine I guess.

Comment: “What do you like about him?”

Hisoka: What I like about Penpen… There’s a lot, but my favourite things are—. The fact he feels good to cuddle and that I can have a nice dream… Zzz…

Yuki: Hey. Don’t fall asleep while hugging him.

Comment: “Lololol”

Comment: “It’s cute, so let him sleep!”

Hisoka: I’m not asleep yet… Hey, Yuki. What else is in that box?

Yuki: Ahh. There’s a bunch of clothes that I made for Penpen in my spare time.

Comment: “Say what? That’s adorable”

Hisoka: Yeah… Yuki makes clothes for Penpen from time to time. And he also fixes up the ones that get frayed.

Comment: “That’s Yuki-kun for you!”

Comment: “He’s so nice~”

Yuki: Well, I have fun when I do it.

Hisoka: But I’ve never seen these outfits before. Did you make them and store them?

Yuki: Ahh… there were parts that I didn’t really like about those, so I shelved them. But, I mean, I just brought them over since I had the opportunity today.

Comment: “I wanna see them!”

Comment: “Show us!”

Hisoka: I wanna see too.

Yuki: Alright, alright. Err, this is a dress, and a Christmas-designed sweater and shoes…

Comment: “Woah, cute!”

Comment: “There’s so many”

Comment: “It’s all-you-can-dress up”

Hisoka: They look so fluffy and warm… There’s no need at all to stash them away.

Yuki: You think so? Well, when you make something yourself, you’re critical about the details, right?

Hisoka: Oh, really?

Yuki: I think I've also made a lot of cute stuff solely according to my own taste though.

Hisoka: I don’t mind. I like the clothes and accessories that Yuki made for Penpen.

Comment: “I think they’re great too!”

Comment: “I bet all of them would look good on Penpen”

Hisoka: I’d like to dress Penpen up in all kinds of different clothes.

Yuki: Really? I’ll give them all to you then. You can coordinate the outfits you like.

Hisoka: Are you sure? Thanks. I’ll dress him up a lot later.

Option 1: “Great for you!”

Comment: “Great for you, Hisoka-kun!”

Comment: “That’s great for Penpen too”

Hisoka: Yeah. Penpen’s in a great mood today…

Comment: “Eh, he can be in a bad mood?”

Hisoka: Yeah. He even talks to me sometimes…

Comment: “EHH!?”

Comment: “Penpen’s a stuffed animal, isn’t he!?”

Hisoka: …Fufu.

Option 2: “Which one will you make him wear him first?”

Hisoka: Which one should I use? Maybe something warm. Ah, penguins don’t mind the cold…

Comment: “It’s nice he’s putting so much thought in for Penpen”

Comment: “I really wanna see Hisoka-san change his clothes!”

Yuki: Alright, you were gonna introduce different things that you like, weren’t you? Anything apart from Penpen?

Hisoka: Apart from Penpen... Ma—.

Yuki: Everyone knows you like marshmallows. Wait, you mentioned that earlier, didn’t you? What else?

Hisoka: … Sleeping.

Yuki: Everyone knows that too.

Comment: “Yuki’s cutting him down quick lol”

Comment: “That’s Hisoka-kun for you”

Hisoka: Other things I like… Umm… …Once I think of something, I’ll report it on InsteLive again. Is that alright?

Comment: “Of course!”

Comment: “I’d be happy if you did another stream”

Comment: “I’m looking forward to it!”

Hisoka: Alright then, this is the end—.

Izumi: Take your selfie!

Hisoka: Selfie?

Yuki: Yeah, the one you’ll upload to Inste after. Everyone’s doing it, so you have to too.

Hisoka: Okay. What pose should I make?

Comment: “A cute pose!”

Comment: “Do a pose you like~”

Hisoka: I like… Ah. I remembered one more thing that I like.

*click*

Hisoka: …How’s this?

Yuki: Yeah, it came out great.

Hisoka: Alright, this ends the stream. …See you.

-pause-

Izumi: Good job, you two! I’m relieved it wrapped up.

Hisoka: …I did a lot, so I’m sleepy.

Yuki: Upload the photo to Inste before you sleep, will you? You’re gonna forget to post it if you go back to your room like this.

Hisoka: Alright, I’ll do it now. …Does this photo work, Director?

Izumi: Yep, it’s perfect!

Hisoka: …Okay.

My favourite animal. Cat pose.

Hisoka: Well then, goodnight. Director, Yuki.

*leaves*

Yuki: He’s just like a cat, huh?

Izumi: Fufu. Yep.

---

previous |

#a3!#a3! translation #mikage hisoka #act! addict! actors!

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oftenderweapons · 3 years ago

Note

Sooo, about the ask thing. First off all congratulations I love you and your writing 💜 you seem like such a nice, intelligent and funny person. But was thinking what if namjoon comes home drunk and guilty about something he did and vixen comforts him. Love u💋

Title: Drunk (&) In Love

Pairing: Namjoon x reader (nicknamed Vixen)

Wordcount: 2.6k

Genre: crack, fluff, (also, vaguely allusive)

Rating: 18+ cause THESE TWO ARE A MESS FOR EACH OTHER

Synopsis: apparently Namjoon's stag party went a bit too wild. Mostly since he was drinking guilt away. What could that possibly be about?

Trigger warnings: swearing, consumption of alcohol, horny!drunk Joon, he clumsily tries to seduce his fianceé in front of yoonjintae (second-hand embarrassment), stressing over vows, mentions of kinky letters, they discuss future and the fear of marrying young and pretty much out of the blue and they be mentioning the idea of having kids. Also, watch Vixen being the caregiver.

Author's note: Thanking the sweetheart @ironicarmy !!! I love exchanging WIPs and Beta reading! It was so fun and I AM LOVING YOUR WIP SO HARD IM GONNA EXPLODE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! can't wait for it to be out so I can fangirl in public LOLOLOL; also thanking @dopesportsoperatorzonk for this request! (I got your feminism ask, I promise I'm almost done, I wanted to have a quite thorough view before replying and I'm still thinking about some stuff, but it'll be readdy super soon!!!)

Here's my masterlist, btw, and enjoy 💜✨

You weren't supposed to wait up for him, but it was like your sixth sense was telling you to do precisely that. And your premonition turned especially accurate once you were met with the sorry sight of Namjoon hanging off Taehyung's and Seokjin's body, grinning as he saw you appear at the door, head to toe smitten, only to turn to his friends with a sneer as he realised you were wearing his favourite silk robe. The deep crimson colour seemed to spark the colour of your hair on fire, and make the lineaments of your face sharper, older, with a kind of allure he still couldn't understand. “Little fox,” he said, going grabby hands while his arms were still around his friends' shoulders.

You tried to keep your expression stern as you looked at the two men literally holding him up. “What is this? Didn't I tell you to bring him home whole and safe?”

Taehyung lowered his gaze to the floor.

“Is this your idea of safe, Seokjin? I expected better.”

“You know him. He did this to himself.” Yoongi spoke neutrally from behind the three.

“Yoongi. Him being a fucking grizzly doesn't mean he can hold his liquor. Bring him in,” you said, freeing the entryway for the triplet coming in, Yoongi in tow.

“We should have brought him to the dorms,” he muttered.

“Dorms?!? Aneeyo…” Namjoon babbled, shaking his head, falling with his ass on the sofa. “No babylove in dorms,” he said with a hiccup. “Hello, little one,” he purred, grabbing your hips and trying to pull you towards him.

You blushed and slapped at his wrists. “I'll deal with you later—”

“Feisty brat,” he spoke sultrily, making Yoongi shake his head while Seokjin and Taehyung snickered before being chastised by your scolding stare.

“How come he's drunk off his ass and the three of you are perfectly okay?”

“He's the one getting married,” Taehyung replied, matter of factly. “And yes, he was the one who swallowed a bottle of hard liquor without even flinching.”

You glance at Namjoon with a scornful expression.

He did some very drunk, very clumsy attempt at a wink that made you inhale as you desperately looked for a crumb of patient left.

“You'd better go home, before I smack you all on the head,” you said, shooing them off.

“You'd have to reach it first,” Taehyung muttered, making Seokjin giggle, Yoongi rubbing his face at the verbal violence that was about to come.

“Kim Taehyung. I may not be tall enough for your royal head, but your girlfriend is my best friend. I won't say much more because I'm sure your friends aren't interested in your ass getting bruised.”

Yoongi smiled smugly at that one.

“Hell yeah…” Namjoon chuckled from the sofa, one hand reaching for the back of your thigh.

“No. Not now.”

“Later then?” He asked with puppy eyes before they turned into a very tipsy version of his intense dragon glance. “You’re so sexy when you’re mean,” he rumbled, a hand reaching for your thigh underneath the robe.

“Kim Namjoon, if you don’t stop I will unwife you in this instant.” Still, the other three men in the room were a mess of embarrassed coughing and teasing snorts. “You can all go home right now,” you said with a curt tone.

“You’re not gonna be able to take him to bed by yourself.” Yoongi cocked an eyebrow as he spoke calmly.

“Mh, Vixen, take me to bed, please,” Namjoon murmured as he tried to seduce you, just as you looked at him and replied, “No need to take him to bed. He’s sleeping on the sofa tonight.”

“See? I told you she found out! She has a sixth sense for this stuff! She can sense it! She can smell fear! I told you!!!” Namjoon babbled, grabbing your wrist. “Little fox...” he cooed, making a fool of himself.

“Go home. All of you. Now.”

Taehyung was the first to leave without even saying goodbye. He knew he would pay for it. Seokjin was the next, saying bye to Namjoon very briefly before bowing to you — just slightly. “I’m sorry for the inconvenience, goodnight,” he apologised, making his way out.

“Yoongi?”

He rubbed his neck. “I’m sorry. Really. I— I didn’t do my job.”

You shook your head. “This is a mess I’ll have to deal with.”

“You know you’ll kind of have to deal with him for the rest of your life, right?” Yoongi looked at Namjoon, head in his hands, fingers tugging at it nervously.

You followed his gaze, meeting Namjoon in the poorest of states. “I know. He’s my business now. Go.”

Yoongi left without much resistance after that, the door of your apartment finally shutting for good.

“I’m sorry,” Namjoon said, staring up at you as you stood before him. “I fucked up, I’m sorry.”

You placed your hands on his cheeks. “What happened, Joonie bear?”

He shook his head, lip going wobbly. “I’m so sorry!” he babbled again, eyes glossy with unshed tears.

“Oh, no, baby…” you managed to whisper before he dove for your lap, burying his face there. “What happened, love?”

He shook his head.

“Nothing’s gonna change the fact that I love you, big bear.” You caressed his hair as his voice confessed, half-muffled against your tummy.

“I sneaked a look at the dress.” You could hear his words coming out from a pout.

“Joonie—”

“Please don’t unwife me!” He cried out, his voice way too high pitched. “I don’t want to sleep alone ever.” He hugged your legs and held you closer. “I want to sleep next to you until I die.” He got even more emotional as he went on. “I want you to always pet my hair and tell me you’re proud of me and cook for me and be my sweetheart and my babylove and my little fox forever, even when we’re old and I get bald.”

You smiled and invited him to let go of your legs before sitting down, your legs slightly parted laying across the sofa. “Come here, big bear,” you said, patting your stomach. He did as he was told, laying his head below your chest and stretching his long body all over the seat. He struggled a little, his sense of balance temporarily worse than usual. “Soon I’ll be lawfully your bride. Forever. We’re almost there, honey. Just a week.”

He nodded.

“And then I’ll be your little fox until I’m nothing but ashes. And then some,” you reassured him, petting his lovely head, digging your fingers into the knots in his upper back.

“Writing the vows was so difficult.”

“I know baby,” you kept rubbing at his trapezoi until he released a relieved grunt. “I know that must have been really stressful for you.”

“I had to rewrite them sixteen times. Sixteen!” His hand absentmindedly reached your thigh and started rubbing small circles there. “Everytime, they were too long, or too cliché, or something I just couldn’t read in public because you know our letters.”

“I know our letters,” you confirmed, thinking about his messy handwriting on cheap paper, and entire sheets of words that he sent you everytime something important happened, everytime he had to travel for his job, everytime he just needed to make love to you on a deeper level. And then, thinking of your replies, always heartfelt, emotional, with fine calligraphy on expensive ivory sheets often marred with rough spots where a tear fell — most of the time because of joy and gratitude and obliterating, overwhelming love. “Will you read to me the other sixteen versions too, once we’re alone?”

He nodded. “I’ll read them all. I’ll write new ones every day. Small, simple, absolutely mundane. Stuff like, ‘I’ll do the dishes tonight’, or ‘Let’s go out for dinner’, or ‘I wanna grow old with you’ or ‘I don’t wanna watch that porn tonight, let’s just stare into each other’s eyes while naked and have the best tantric sex ever performed’.”

You chuckled and placed your hand atop of his. “I like the last one.”

“But I couldn’t say it in front of your parents, therefore I couldn’t write it in our vows.” He scoffed and shook his head before planting it between your breasts, nosing at the lapels of the robe until he could kiss your naked skin.

“I might have written something along those lines in one of my drafts.” Having this conversation with Namjoon while he was halfway drunk off his ass was extremely entertaining; however, you felt sad at the possibility of him not remembering this moment.

“What else did you write in that draft?” He closed his eyes, waiting for your soft voice to calm him down.

You smiled and slightly teared up at the thought, his chin propped on your chest, one of his thumbs reaching out to dry up a tear. “I wrote that I hope I get to make you smile every day and see that insanely cute and sexy dimple of yours every morning after you wake up. And I want to be the only one listening to your deep bedroom voice waking me up. And I want to listen to you as you talk to our children. I wanna hear all the stories, and watch your smile shine on their faces.”

Namjoon hid his face against your chest, feeling tears roll down his cheeks.

“I want them to have your eyes. I want to see your complete wonder as they learn about the world, as you teach them about the world in that grand and beautiful way you see it.” You sniffled and he cupped your face, kissing your lips so slowly, the heavy tang of liquor barely tainting the moment.

“I want to walk by your side, until we’re too tired to walk and watch time pass by, without worries, without haste. I don’t care where we’re walking because you were the place I was destined to be.”

Namjoon couldn’t explain tenderness or love or devotion or faith as deep as the ones he felt for you. He probably wasn’t skilled or trained enough.

“I know we’re young. I know this is more of a bet than an actual marriage. I’ve seen people who have been together for years part ways so easily and I don’t even know why you said yes to me. Sometimes I doubt I’m deserving and I see in how many ways I’m lacking and I ask myself, 'why the hell did she say yes to me?' ” He snickered sarcastically. “I wouldn’t have said yes to myself.”

You shook your head and kissed his brow.

“But I’ve been with other people and you have too and… I don’t know, sometimes I feel like this will take a lot of effort but then I hear you laugh, I hear you calling my name and I know, I can feel that that’s what it is supposed to sound like.”

You smiled at him, fixing your position so he could lay on you without worrying about smashing your body.

“I’m so confused and so grateful for this. It’s like… Suddenly winning the lottery. One minute you’re just a person and next you realise you’re going to be a husband. And you don’t know what’s going to happen to you, how your life is going to change, but with you I’m not scared.” He chuckled. “Well, I am. But you make me braver than my fears. And I know I could lose you any day. I could fuck up, or we could just drift apart or something. But any moment spent with you is bigger. It’s better and brighter.”

By now you were a teary mess, face drenched in tears, his arms around your torso as he held onto you. “My soul has found a home in you and I will cherish it. I’ll take care of that home. I’ll make sure nothing damages it. I’ll help you work on it if you want to change it. I will make more room when our family gets bigger. I will fix it when I can. I’ll stay by your side when I’m not skilled enough to heal you. To fix you.” He sniffled, voice hollow and weak as he spoke through a lump in his throat. “And I’ll leave if you ever ask me to.”

You shook your head and hugged him, letting him sob in your arms. “I hope I never lose you.”

“Don’t be a silly bear,” you comforted him, lulling him, holding him close to your heart. “I’ll be your bride. Your spouse. Your wife.” You kissed his head. “And your home. Your relief. Your dirty, secret affair. Your devoted companion too. Your goddess and your toy. I’ll be your friend. And the mother of your children, when we want to.”

God, if he wanted to… But first, he needed to enjoy having you all to himself for a couple more years. Just to make sure you hadn’t been both bold and immature and absolutely stupid about getting married almost two years after meeting for the first time.

“So I’m not getting unwifed for sneaking a peek at the dress?”

You shook your head. “It looks completely different once worn.”

“Really?” His expression exploded with euphoria.

You smiled. “Really.”

His drunken grin was back. “So I’m gonna sleep on the bed right?”

You acted as if you were even thinking about it. “You’re really drunk.”

“I’m soberer now.”

“And you embarrassed me in front of your friends,” you reminded him with a cocked eyebrow.

“Not my fault my wifey’s so hot,” he said with a slightly more accomplished wink.

“Not your wifey yet,” you reminded him.

He tutted. “Just a matter of days.” He kissed your sweet spot, on the side of your neck. “It’s only a technicality.”

You looked at him suspiciously. “A technicality, you say?”

He nodded and held you tighter.

“This technicality could still leave you at the altar, waiting,” you teased.

“Come on, I want to sleep next to you.” He kissed your cheek. “On our bed.” He kissed you again. “Where we’ll be making so many babies.”

“Stop right there, mister.” You placed a finger against his plush lips before you shook your head no. “No babies for a few years. I want you all mine, hubby.”

He chuckled and pressed his forehead against your chest bone. “Okay, fine, but I just meant hypothetically. You know, for practice.”

“Yeah, I think I could use some practice. I want to be perfect at it.”

He smiled and kissed your nose. If only she knew how perfect she is, he thought, haphazardly sitting up and waiting for you to help him on his feet, the whole discourse sobering him up enough that he managed to sit on the bench in the bathroom as you washed his face and brushed his teeth, as you undressed him and helped him in the shower, undressing and joining him, his body too tired and unstable to initiate anything fancy.

And then you towelled him up, rubbing body lotion on his always-too-dry legs before helping him in his boxers.

And through the process, he understood how it was that you loved him so much anytime he got you ready for bed. He should let you do this more often. Especially when he wasn’t exhausted or drunk, so he could properly enjoy being cuddled and fondled and babied.

What he didn’t expect was for it to feel so comfortable when you slid up against his back on the bed, spooning his ridiculously large body with your smaller one. “Sleep tight, big bear,” you said before kissing his nape. “Eight more sleeps and we’ll be married.”

He smiled. “Goodnight, little fox.” And with that, he caught your hand in his and fell asleep.

#kim namjoon fluff #namjoon crack #bts fanfiction #bts fanfiction blog #namjoon drabble #houseofddaeng #52hertz #thebtswritersclub #thetruthuntoldnet #namjoon x reader #namjoon x yn #namjoon x vixen

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muggycuphead · 2 years ago

Text

weird flex but ok i guess pt.8

War… Hold up, do we really need a warning for this one? Dunno, but however, watch out for slightly disturbing and kinda…disgusting imagery, trypophobic patterns, as well as ‘necrotic’ designs I made while having funky fever bc o h m y g o d do I get a little crazier every new quarantine day (and at this point it’s coming to be an usual thing for me, big sad). However, most are made no other than for the sole sake of satire, so y’know, no need to get your underwear in a twist

Friday Night Funkin’ BoyFriend’s Hood – Missing Sketchdumps (VII-IX) [written: 02-08-2022]

Oh no forgot to write down about these ones

Oh well, gotta do it now here I guess (I’ll be as condensed as I can…unlike above)

PD: I don’t have any ‘digitalized’ versions of these either (I feel kinda silly for making the other ones, but oh well), so we gonna stick with the trad sketches

EDIT 26/10/2023: Updated the drawings with rescanned, more clean versions

Friday Night Funkin’ BoyFriend’s Hood – AU fanconcept sketches [VII]

1.-Rocky Bal-BF

Funny wrestling man

Not gonna lie, he looks kinda cute in that outfit I made for him

2.-Rocky Bal-BF but his balls dieded

>All males left the server

This be a case of Herodias’(? Law

You die, you get blueballed

You get through the first round, you get your jimmies turned into scrambled eggs

Goodbye

My penis

Nutshell

3.-Egypcian staff

Haha funny snake stick go zzzzz

4.-Egypcian…mic?

Custom mic designs FTW

5.-Hypnotized!Mummy BF

Free will? Not happening lololol

6.-BF’s bike

Yes please

Did this with references I had in my PC, but most the work was homemade so shush

7.-Rocky Bal-BF icongrid

He’s in a lot of pain right there, but can you really blame him?

No one told him that rocky bitch was gonna go torpedo mode with her fist…on his crotch :/

8.- Hypnotized!Mummy BF’s icon

You’re chicken now

9.- Helmet Pico

I was gonna say this is the part I didn’t want to reach…but time managed to kill off the shame I used to feel over this

Compared to what other people had done to Pico in the fandom, this is just vanilla

His design does look kinda different from this though (talking about the idea, I don’t have a sketch yet)

Still, if V’s somehow seeing this- I’m sorry

10.- The helmet, now

Watch it with those ginger peaks, fella

The zombeeps are already having it tough to keep some of his sanity with the blackout shit going on, you bring in your flame looking ass haircut in here, and you’ll lead us to real pain out there

11.- Helmet Pico

Stfu

Friday Night Funkin’ BoyFriend’s Hood – AU fanconcept sketches [VIII]

1.- BoneOilers Leader

Originally written to be a bad guy – now he’s just as confused as most of the human homies over what’s just happening in the hood

Proud of his design though, he be lookin’ badass

2.-Rockonna’s Coach

I love this fucker, he’s like the bastardization of an elf; plus, he’s pretty chill

3.- Terresa

She looks like a medical Carol Roll wot-

God bless her soul tho, she’s a sweetheart

I ship her platonically with BF, don’t ask why

4.- BF Roadkill icon

Drive with caution, kids, especially if you go on bikes

5.- Terresa icon

Scratch’d faez

6.- Freakystein Idle

Zombeeps go wee-woo, freaky bois go beep-bup-bap

7.- Heart

Probably BF’s, he got the undead sickie soooo…y’know

8.- BF’s phone

Wonder where those cheeky bastards took that photo at

Tip: comfy place where you go zZZZz

9.- Whisky

GF got stolen by who knows, time to go drown the sadness in a cup of alcohol

Friday Night Funkin’ BoyFriend’s Hood – AU fanconcept sketches [IX]

1.- Generator BF

Man, this didn’t age that well considering BF is supposed to not have any sensical fears…besides lighting

…Unless the feeling of getting electrocuted and posteriorly turned into a human energy tower could be somehow associated with it, then maybe

…Wait, BF’sH BF isn’t directly the main FNF canon BF…

Nevermind

2.- Crowbar BF

The way he posin there is like “Yo, when we droppin’ for the next robbery?”

3.- Sick BF

The zombie sickness’ finally kicking in, say your prayers

…or maybe not, who cares

4.- Roadkill BF

RIP

…nah

5.- Sick BF 2

Fuck, it finally got into his bloodstream

6.- Loose GF

Yeah, this was a thing in the main concept

Basically GirlFriend’s outbreak from her captors, the fact she looks like her mother was a sneaky bonus

Sadly it won’t stick fancanonically, so RIP

7.- Loose GF’s icon

Crazy bitch

8.- BF about to snap

Next line: b R A I N S

Nah just kidding

He just gonna growl-beep for the rest of the song

9.- Differences between Demon and Zombie glitters

Self-explanatory

10.- BF’s crowbar

Wait are the black tones the blo- oh no wait they’re the metal part

My bad

11.- PICO NO

Pico no

Please, no

He had one repair shop lost before by a madman’s fire, he doesn’t wish to go through that again, thank you

12.- Diagonal mechanic arrow holder revamped + Invert and Auto/Action arrow

Invert arrows do be looking disgusting af

Great

13.- Note+Action and Pico!Auto Arrow revamped + Zombie keyholder

Bloodbone and Stitches

…???

The zombie keys are also disgusting

And the effect when they’re pressed doesn’t make them any better

To put it in a single word:

**CHWICK**

14.- Health bar against a zombie

Lineal health bars? Nah, we do the flicky here, baby

#friday night funkin'#fnfau #bfsh #au #alternate universe #alternative timeline #alt universe

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storge · 3 years ago

Note

hi! i’m new to cdramas and honestly don’t know where to start. i was wondering if you have any recs, it can be any genre, ongoing or not too. thanks so much!

Hello friend!!! 💖💖💖💖 Ahhhhhhh okay sorry this took so long to answer. I go blank when people ask me to rec things. Let’s seeeeeeee..... I will give you 3 types of drama areas (85% of these are very popular and are at the top of MDL list for cdramas so sorrryyyyy I’m not original. I am a simple woman that watches wtver grabs me. Also plss try not to judge dramas too harshly by their synopsis on MDL lol.)

This came out longer than I intended so under the cut:

1) Short Less than 35 Eps. (95% romance)

The Romance of Hua Rong- I love this little one. Its cute and funny. People get annoyed by FL but I rather like her and don’t mind her voice. ANDDDD the ML is hot as alll everrrrr. its fun delciousnesssss and there is a supposed Season 2.

Fake Princess- a GEMMM. It’s cute and funny. The FL is great and the plot is pretty good.

Maiden Holmes- Nice little youngins and their found family. Both main and 2nd couple are very cuteeeee.

One and Only- Okay loook, It’s a heartbreaker but it’s sweeeet and there is a sequel coming out to mend your heart.

Put your head on my shoulder- they cuteeee and not dramatic.

The Eternal Love (S1,2,3)- Never gonna give you up type of couple. Cute, funny, and they have good chemistry

When a Snail fall in Love- Its a little gem. Deserves to be at least tried.

Hikaru No go- FRIENDSHIPPPP. RIVALRY. CHU YINGGGGG. one of the best live action related ones Ive seen.

Killer and Healer- Republican "bromanceeee”. Angsty and simple but deliciousnessss. + Painnnnn

QIng Luo- A nice little b-cdrama. Its cute. The cast is pretty good. couple is great.

Dating in the Kitchen- Age gap. They are cute, funny, and have chemistry.

2) Historical setting “more serious”

Nirvana in Fire- it's just GOOODD

Monarch industry (The Rebel Princess)- GOOOOOOD. IT’S a MUST try imo. the couple is everythinggggg

The Rise of Phoenixes- Rip you heart, a little messsy, but goo00od and chen kun loong lockssssss like hellooooo

The Story of the Yanxi Palace - WOMENNNN and GOOOD

Legend of Ruyi- WOMENNN + beautiful clothing + straight up SHADINEESSS but soo gooood

Goodbye My Princesss- PAINNNNN but Good. Great FL and ML.... but I’m ngl you are gonna wanna go 9 rounds in the ring with the ML.

Ever Night- YOUNGINS with a hard knock life. goooood. The romance is a you like it or don’t but good regardless.

Joy of Life- GOOOD. Almost everyone I know seen it. (I liked it less as it got towards the end but that’s just meeeee)

Secret of the three kingdoms- A gooodieee

The Sleuth of Ming Dynasty- A gooodieee. a “bromanceeee”. foood is a languageeee.

Story of the Minglan- goooood. more like slice of life?

The longest day of Chang’an- its goooood and its pretty.

3) Random Dramas that are 50+ eps that don’t really fit other 2 but are very well liked.

Under the Power- okay a lot of people have seemingly not watched this, but its nice, funny at times, and has a some depth. the FL is Great and yeahhh just try it.

Meteor Garden- (2018 version) It’s the F4 that you probably know of from the other countries. The new one is better than what I thought it would be.

Go ahead- Everyone I know love lovedddd this. I don’t like childhood besties to lovers trope so i dropped it but that’s just me. From what I saw its goood.

The Legends/Arsenal Military Academy- Bai Lu and Xu Kai are just deliciousnessssss. The dramas are perfectly fine, but these 2 chemistry are worth watching them.

The Untamed- Come onnnnnnnnn. If you have even looked at cdrama tumblr you have seen thissssss. It really is worth EVERY BIT.

Love and Redemption- deep love + PAINNNN + tropeeessss + chengyi you make pain look delicioussssss + happy ending

Love better than Immortality- I feel shamed if I don’t include long haired Hong yi. Friend its not the best, but the plot works and the couple is deliciousnesssss. and cheatingggg but its only 40 eps.

Ashes of love- another everyone watcher. This drama got my mother back into cdramas so yeahhhh, try it lololol.

Only a few of these are in a Modern setting... sorry, it’s just not what I watch and enjoy mostly. I tried to be broad with the choices. I’ve seen all of these but 1. If you like any of these I can probably rec something close to it. And If you tried these and think they are all terrible than I’m sorry I got your hopes up.😅😅😅😅

#thanks for asking me friend!!!!#this seems long but i literally had to trim it #i talk to much I know i knoowwwwww #so many better dramas I missed but heyyyyyy i never promised taste #some of these I have no idea why they popped in my head but i just HAD to add them ololol #anywaysss #cdrama #*recs #*no anons only friends #words

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osakaso5 · 3 years ago

Photo

Nagi Rokuya Birthday Photobook Rabbit Chat Part 3: Nagi And His Senior Idols

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 4 | Part 5

Tsumugi: Thank you for gathering here today..! This project was created to show more of Nagi-san’s true nature as a way to commemorate the release of the Nagi Photobook.

Tsumugi: I’m sure you must be busy, but I’d like for you to talk as you usually do. I look forward to chatting with you!

Nagi: Feel free to discuss every one of my good points. Now, begin.

Ryunosuke: Hello, Nagi-kun! I was excited for your photobook!

Nagi: Hello.

Yuki: You're as cold as I heard.

Momo: Yoohoo, Nagi~! Mind giving us a little more of a warm welcome???

Nagi: I do not mean to treat you coldly. This is how I normally operate.

Yuki: Like a train?

Gaku: You're not like this when you talk to me. What's going on?

Nagi: Hm, is that so? Perhaps I must correct my conduct around you...

Gaku: Why? (lol)

Tenn: Gaku, are you done trying to act like the two of you are best friends?

Ryunosuke: Wait, Gaku and Nagi-kun are friends!? I want to be friends with him, too. Do you think we could make that happen?

Tenn: Ryu, you're veering dangerously close to flirty territory again.

Ryunosuke: Huh!?

Yuki: It's almost scary, how unaware of his own flirting he is. He and Nagi-kun are pretty much polar opposites.

Momo: I think you're a little like Ryu in that respect, too...

Yuki: Am I?

Tsumugi: Nagi-san, please say something ><

Ryunosuke: Did he fall asleep?

Nagi: Of course not. I was merely observing our chat log, in case any of you felt like talking about my photobook.

Gaku: Geez, you're really gonna keep doing this aren't you? (lol)

Tenn: Nagi Rokuya, your crying face makes you look like a child.

Momo: Ah, you mean in the social media pic~!? Wasn't that taken during one of his Cocona marathons? lolol

Nagi: OH, I was not expecting you to open with that. Cute, was it not? Although Mitsuki is the only cutie we need.

Gaku: I thought we were finally gonna talk about your photobook, but now you're just bragging about your teammates!

Nagi: Is that a problem? :-)))

Gaku: No!

Nagi: I do enjoy your banter, Yaotome-shi.

Momo: Nagi, you're so funny, lolololol

Nagi: Am I? :-P

Yuki: I didn't know you even could cry.

Nagi: ? What do you mean?

Yuki: Nothing.

Ryunosuke: That picture of you with the cherry blossoms was cool! I was completely drawn to it.

Nagi: I think you should take a photograph in front of the nighttime sakura, as well.

Ryunosuke: I'm not really the type who'd look good around sakura, lol

Yuki: You're more of a hibiscus kind of guy.

Tenn: Totally.

Nagi: Uminchu (1).

Tsumugi: Mitsuki-san just sent me a message saying: "Nagi's trying to mail order a ton of hibiscuses and send them to Yaotome Productions, I'll go pretend I'm Cocona until he comes to his senses"..!?

Ryunosuke: W-why!?

Yuki: That's hilarious.

Tenn: No, it's not...

Gaku: Yeah, it is.

Tenn: It shouldn't be.

Momo: Hey, Nagi! Why were you trying to send them hibiscuses!? lolololol

Nagi: So Tsunashi-shi may be photographed against a hibiscus background? He may not look as good as me, but I am sure they will suit him nonetheless.

Nagi: Consider it a thanks for his appreciation of the photobook Sogo produced for me.

Ryunosuke: B-but... I just said what I felt, are you sure I should accept the flowers?

Tenn: Don't look so happy, Ryu.

Yuki: Maybe you could send me flowers, too

Nagi: Will edible flowers do?

Momo: LMAO

Tsumugi: Um, I received another message from Mitsuki-san, this time saying "He's just got this creepy, serene look on his face! And he's not stopping, in fact now he's trying to buy edible flowers"...

Momo: He's actually doing it, lolololol

Yuki: How many were you planning to get us, by the way?

Nagi: 1100.

Momo: Figures!!! Are you rewarding us for talking about the Nagi Photobook or something!? lololol

Gaku: Is this some kind of reforestation campaign?

Nagi: You are to photograph yourselves in front of the flowers I send you, holding a Nagi Photobook, and then upload it on social media.

Nagi: On June 20th, at exactly midnight, of course :-))))

Yuki: That'll be one hell of a picture. Sounds fun

Momo: Let's do it! A handsome Nagi in bed plus Re:vale in front of tons of edible flowers equals a massive reaction, lololol

Ryunosuke: Now I'm getting nervous! It's a big responsibility, but I'll try my best to take a good picture.

Gaku: Ryu, if you're doing it, don't take the photo yourself. I'll do it.

Ryunosuke: Thank you!

Tenn: I don't care anymore.

Tsumugi: Before we get more sidetracked, here are some questions the others prepared for you...

Nagi: I was waiting for this. It is about time for me to free Mitsuki, who is still pretending to be Cocona for me X-P

Choices/outcomes:

1. Why do you like anime?

Nagi: It is a long story... But to put it shortly, anime is one of the things that saved me.

2. Meat or veggies?

Nagi: I like both. But if you mean my conduct with the ladies, I am more of a carnivorous type... ;-P

3. Do you do anything specific to maintain your physique?

Nagi: I watch Cocona. The sheer excitement is enough for me to break into a sweat, and it has a detoxing effect.

Nagi: I look forward to each of your photobooks, as well.

Gaku: Oh, that's nice to hear. Let us know what you thought, okay (lol)

Nagi: I think I will be able to judge them based entirely on how Sogo will be acting when they release.

Gaku: Why Osaka?

Ryunosuke: He did say he's our fan!

Nagi: Unfortunately, that appears to be the case ;-(

Yuki: Unfortunately?

Nagi: Sogo and Mitsuki are such rabid fanboys ;-(

Nagi: By the way, Kujo-shi, I hope you will look forward to the Riku Photobook, which I will be producing.

Tenn: ^^

Tsumugi: Aaaah, I'll cut this part out of the public version..!

Tenn: Oh. Okay then.

Tenn: I expect a cover portraying your center as the healthy and wholesome 18-year- old he is ^^

Nagi: OH, do not fret, Kujo-shi. I understand completely (V)o¥o(V)

Tenn: What is that kaomoji supposed to be..?

Nagi: (V)o¥o(V)

Momo: I knew this when I read your photobook, but you've gotten soft, Nagi! In a good way!

Nagi: What? But I have not gained any weight!

Momo: That's not what I meant, lololol I meant your personality and vibe, stuff like that.

Nagi: What makes you say that?

Momo: Just a hunch!

Nagi: A hunch?

Momo: You used to be like Yuki, when he was younger.

Yuki: Did he now? Does that mean I should get into Cocona, too?

Momo: Nah, I think you're good, lololol

Gaku: I kinda get what you mean. My image of him changed after we did MATSURI together, too.

Nagi: If that is the case... Then perhaps I have finally found a place where I can truly be myself.

Ryunosuke: Are you happy right now, Nagi-kun?

Nagi: Yes. More than anyone else in the world.

Ryunosuke: That's great!

Tenn: You've found something to hold dear.

Nagi: Moments of happiness, sadness, and anger. It is a routine we have come to share. I think it has changed not only me, but each and every one of us.

Nagi: Meeting all of you has changed us greatly. Thank you for paving the way for us.

Momo: He's finally warmed up to us..!

Yuki: That he has.

Nagi: Though we will be the ones paving the rest of the way for you :-P

Gaku: Nah, he's still his usual self (lol)

Tsumugi: We've changed because of you, Nagi-san.

Tsumugi: Thank you for keeping your cool. No matter what happens, I feel like we can always get back on track, as long as you're with us.

Tsumugi: Still, I know we can't keep relying on you like this... So I'll make sure to become the kind of manager you can even complain to!

Nagi: I thought a true man should never complain.

Nagi: However, I now realize that my feelings on the matter might be hurting you.

Nagi: Thank you all for coming here tonight. I was happy to talk to you.

Nagi: Though I do not dare wish for more, I have come to feel that maybe having 12 of us is even better than having 7 of us. I hope you will understand this feeling, too.

Translator’s notes..?

1) Uminchu basically means “man of the sea” in Uchinaaguchi/Okinawan

#idolish7 #nagi rokuya #birthday photobook #translation #i7 #rabbit chat

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tarisilmarwen · 2 years ago

Text

Rebels Rewatch: "Blood Sisters"

Enemies To Friends Speedrun: The Episode.

Fond of that detailing on the overhang there, look at it.

I think Sabine already knew the mission was meant for her, she seems a little bit flustered and agitated that Ezra's trying to insert himself into it.

And of course doesn't pass up an opportunity to give him a playful elbow jab.

Hera gives the two the mission, telling Ezra that Sabine's in charge, which he's perfectly okay with. Continuing with the previous episode it's obvious Ezra has sorted out his growing pains teenage angst and has returned to normal.

Normal being "adorable eager puppy", especially around Sabine lol.

I do wonder... from how she acts in the beginning here and some of the later dialogue it sounds kind of like Sabine is going through a bit of a midteen crisis too. Could be either triggered like Ezra's by the events of "Always Two There Are" or could just be her having One Of Those Moods.

Ezra's rambling suggests it's more the latter, that Sabine just sometimes gets All Up In Her Feelings and starts self-isolating and wanting space and pushing people away.

I do like the implication that Ezra's sought her out when she's gotten in these Moods to see if she's okay (and had to be told to go away because Sabine's in, "I don't have any problems, leave me alone." denial lol).

Him checking up on her in concern when he can sense she's out of sorts is a cute thought. :)

Sabine spies some of Ketsu's graffiti but doesn't bring it up and the two proceed to the mission, or as I like to call it, an exercise in secondhand embarrassment.

Someone help these poor children.

Still cannot get over how tiny Ezra was in the early seasons.

Kestu makes her appearance with a flurry of exotic-sounding percussion in the score. This new theme (linked because it's hard to hear under the dialogue) is full of drums and clappers and synth strings and a wild flute and sounds appropriately tense and dangerous for Ketsu.

Ezra nervous little glances between the girls aww.

A little bit of classic Western Gunfight with the shot choices here.

Subtle animation appreciation moment: Ketsu's reflection in Sabine's visor. (Reflections be a bitch to animate.)

Ezra's resigned look when the Stormtroopers stumble across them lololol.

Okay I GUESS the friendly way Ketsu and Sabine can banter in the middle of a firefight and how they wound up shooting from behind the same stack of crates with no issue despite being at odds literal moments ago was supposed to be a sign that they're still friends deep down but--*grumbles, mutters something about rushed writing*

"Bet you're glad you brought backup!" "Yeah, it's working out great! Exactly as planned!"

Ah nice to know the two don't change when it comes to stealing Imperial ships together. :)

She told you to hang on, Ezra.

I do have to laugh at this one poor trooper's veeeeeeeery close call ha ha.

Ketsu's flutes trill out again for this little chase. Which is decently staged, the blown airlock sequence does feel nicely harrowing.

Sabine looks very pretty this episode.

Chopper being a menace, per usual, lol.

Right so whose idea was it to have Chopper cover his eyes because that was a pretty good idea, definitely makes us believe he's scared.

Sabine calling Chopper her friend, aww.

Surprise! She's actually hella cute in a fierce way. I do dig that she has legitimately violet eyes, just a nice little touch reminding us we're not quite in our galaxy.

Sabine's speech here recalls some of Ezra's, about how she used to be out for herself.

"I forgive you." Ssssshhfjhhhhh okay. Okay Sabine. Sure. Seems a bit quick and this is definitely at odds and doesn't quite fit with what we know about her tragic backstory later but... sure. Whatever. We'll just... go with it.

Probably a good thing they established two episodes ago that there's an Imperial checkpoint out here in general Garel airspace, at least this interruption doesn't come completely out of nowhere.

Aaaaaaaand just like that they are suddenly friends again. Okay.

Well now that they've completely dropped all animosity they hash out a predictably explosive plan. One they kind of overexplain a bit.

"Contain the problem immediately!" Oh right, like it's their fault their reactor core's going to explode.

I mean it is their fault in this case but still.

This poor droid pilot though. He was just doing his job, man.

There is an awful lot of Telling instead of Showing this episode, it's kind of irritating me.

Dunno where this is but it's pretty.

Lol Artoo and Chopper's grumpy acknowledgement of each other.

I really can't praise the environments on this show enough.

"Last time I saw these two, they were gonna shoot each other." "If I recall correctly when we first met you, you were stealing from us." Yeah that's not even remotely the same thing, Hera.

Ezra still immediately attempting to befriend Sabine's friend, who's like, "Oh yeah Sabine told me aaaaall about you."

Help me he's so cute. <3

*grumbles in frustration at this conversation* Nothing about this is merited, there is no character throughline here hkfjhdkjhnn.

A very soft and gentle variation of Ketsu's theme here to close us out.

I... don't really rewatch this episode a lot, as you can probably tell. I always thought Sabine just blindly and unconditionally forgiving Ketsu didn't make sense. Not necessarily on her end, because Sabine obviously thinks meeting her new family in the Spectres is the best thing that could have happened to her and she's had a Jedi around probably teaching her a few things about letting go of grudges, but I never understood why it would make Ketsu turn and just... drop her apparently lucrative and desirable bounty hunter career. And it just seems even more weird with what we learn about Sabine's backstory later, that she'd already had her trust broken deeply by her family and then again some time down the line by her supposed best friend who escaped the Academy with her.

Ketsu really doesn't get enough actual characterization for her turn to be believable either.

Beyond those issues the episode is just... kind of dull? Sabine and Ketsu's interactions aren't really that engaging for me so as soon as we leave Garel my brain kind of checks out.

We do get a little bit of backstory stuff that informs and adds layers to Sabine and some other cute bits here and there. But it's not exactly one of my favorites.

Back to form next episode, though, for character arc completions and some "Zero Hour" relevant foreshadowing.

#star wars #star wars rebels #rebels rewatch #ezra bridger #liveblog #sabezra

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marindram · 4 years ago

Text

full transcription of Marin's blog from Omega Mart!

huge thanks to @b0chelly for recording a scroll-through, which i typed this out from. (and warning for Omega Mart lore/story spoilers. second half is in reblog)

Marinknows.best

Location: Seven Monolith Village

Last Login: 12/31/2019

Profile Views: 101,275

About me: I love listening to music and glitter

Friends (0)

June 26, 2018

Happy Birthday to meeeeeeeeee!

So 14 feels way different than 13. For real. I think it's because I was expecting 13 to feel different, but sometimes when you expect something it turns out the opposite ya know?

Plus, 13 is like, "I'm new to being a teenager!!"

14 is more like, "I'm becoming the person I want to be." At least that's how I want it to be. I wanted to start this blog as a record of all that.

I should ask Did you guys feel the same way when you turned 13 and 14?

But probably nobody's gonna read this because I'm just a weirdo in the weird dessert. I mean, I know my best friend Jesse is reading this (hi Jesse). Besides her, crickets.

But yeah, if you are reading this and you don't know me - I live in Seven Monolith Village, a teensy tiny town that you've only heard of if you're into aliens or homesteading. And I'm literally stuck. As in, I'm physically unable to leave. My first memories are of all the adults in my life (Charlie, my great-uncle/father-figure - Rose, my what? Roommate? Mother-figure? Pseudo-aunt? All of the above? and my mom, Cecelia. who doesn't live here) telling me that for some reason, there's something wrong with me that makes it so I can't leave a certain radius of where we live. I got older and thought that they were just exaggerating to keep me safe, but then last year I tried. And it was, let's just say not good.

Anyway. That part of my life sucks, but not everything sucks. This year is all about Marin Dram 2.0. Not new, but definitely improved.

And maybe someday, somehow somebody will read this and care about what I have to say. Somebodies, even. Until then, this is Marin Dram signing off and sending my lame contemplations into the void!

July 1, 2018

Things I Want To Do Before I Turn 20 (and some of these will never happen like are literally unable to happen but JUST LET ME DREAM

1. Kiss someone (who???)

2. Meet HTB (kiss him) (jk he would never) (plus meeting him would be enough)

3. Go to Paris

4. Go to Rome (or somewhere cooler in Italy, look up where is the best pasta???)

5. Go to Greenland (why not???)

6. Go to New York City

7. Go to LA (with a dream and my cardigan lol)

8. Go to the Grand Canyon (this isn't mine, but 9, Jesse is sitting right here and she went to the GC when we were 12 and she's like blah blah blah it's my favorite place in the world and you'll love it. I'm doing this so she'll shut up.

9. Live in a normal house with normal rooms → ideally 12 of them: living room AND TV room, kitchen, dining room, 3 bathrooms, 3 bedrooms, study/library.

-plus an upstairs downstairs

-I'm willing to compromise on the number of rooms as long as there's more than ONE for TWO PEOPLE and I got my own

-plus an upstairs/downstairs

-I'm willing to compromise on the number of rooms as long as there's more than ONE for TWO PEOPLE and I get my own room with an actual door. Very into doors.

10. Go to a mall (Jesse says there's a bunch of bonkers ones in Vegas)

11. Make friends who aren't Jesse (no offense, Jesse)

12. Get Cecelia (my "mom") to teach me about business stuff so I can open my own cool coffeeshop/bookstore someday

13. Learn to drive (ask Charlie to teach me, he's obsessed with his truck) (Jesse says she can teach me because she's Little Miss Mechanic and thinks she knows everything about cars but news flash Jesse: you're you get than me)

14. Figure out my signature style- like I want people to send me pictures of things and be like "this just screamed Marin" and for that to be true

15. Liquid eyeliner??

16. I'm stopping here because I just read over all this and want to die/cry because easily 3/4 of these are literally impossible?

17. Kill me

18. Bye

19. Lololol Charlie just came in and I was complaining about this, not being able to leave and stuff, etc and he said that I should visit new places by... reading books?? And I mean I like to read. But dude. That's the dumbest thing I've ever head.

July 30, 2018

Okay so this is what I want my life to look like:

I want a pink room. Not just pink... P I N K. Cool pink wallpaper (floral? jacquard??), pink carpet, lots of pink flowers everywhere, a four-poster bed with a pink silk canopy, lots of cool pink throw pillows. Like, so pink that

people think I'm being sarcastic! Oh, and BOOKS. Floor-to-ceiling bookcases, and some of the shelves have, like, STUFF on them that isn't books, like gifts people gave me, or things I've collected on my JOURNEYS. You know, normal stuff that people who live on normal places and do normal things have.

If I lived in in this room, it'd be in awhite three-story house at the end of a cul-de-sac (did you know "culs-de-sac" is the plural? Not "cul-de-sacs"? crazy) and I'd wear very classic girly clothes and my hair would always do what I wanted it to. It'd be one of those towns that people call small, but it's actually a city. just one with a kinda small, cozy feeling. Somewhere that gets cold enough to wear cute jackets but not so cold I have to to like, shovel my driveway. Not a non-place with like 100 people where you can't even go outside without going crazy.

August 2nd, 2018

I guess I should explain where I live, for all my avid fans out there! (lol) (hello??)

So like... I don't live on Earth. At least, not the Earth you think of when you think of EARTH. I live in some some weird off-brand version of Earth called the Forked Earth where there are aliens and magic wells of magic energy and everything is MAGIC but like the crappy kind of magic, where the sun never fully rises and some goo called "runoff" has made everything wacky and oh yeah, my mom is responsible for that and everyone here hates her!! LOL

Also, I can't leave! Like, literally can't! Rose says I'm a "special child of Source" and that's why but that LITERALLY explains tells me nothing, in fact it just raises further questions that no one can seem to answer! AHHHHHHHHHH

Anyway, the last time I tried to leave I felt. When I try to leave I feel like I'm being pulled back by something, like you know those old cartoons where someone's on stage doing something dumb and then someone offstage pulls them away with a giant shepard's crook? It felt like that, and when I opened my eyes I was back in 7 Monolith Village. UGH.

I know this sounds crazy!!!!! But believe me when I say that I am the least crazy person here. Also, """here""" is C R A Z Y. Runoff has made everything the bad kind of psychedelic and then people here actually DRINK IT! Not only do I not DRINK THE STUFF THAT HAS MADE THE WORLD INSANE, I also do not talk to aliens (or whatever Nula are) like Rose or believe crazy conspiracy theories like Charlie, so I believe that qualifies me as the most normal person in the Forked Earth, thank you for this honor, I accept this award with humility and grace!

September 4, 2018

I had the weirdest dream last night?? I was swimming in a pool full of cereal, and when I came up for air, my mom was pouring milk on my head like she was rinsing my hair. She had her hand over my face like I was a little kid and she was shielding me from soap getting in my eyes.

Anyway I have no idea what it's supposed to mean. I went to bed hungry and I need to take a shower? Lol

October 16, 2018

I was trying to hide this entry from Jesse, but JESSE IS A NOSY PERSON. She says that blogs are for readers, and if I wanted something to be private then I should "Just write in a fucking notebook and hide it under your bed like a normal person, Marin." I'm allowed to have secrets!! Anyway, I'm making her a freaking playlist, that's why I wouldn't tell her what I was writing about. but EVEN STILL! I'm allowed to have secrets!! But I have this blog because I wanna get my feelings out, I wanna see everything in my head typed out all nice in a way that doesn't make it look insane. You know? I don't know who I'm asking.) Because, it's not like I go to a normal school or have a normal life where I'm surrounded by normal people I can talk to. No one knows about me! I'm trapped in this crazy place and This blog is my only outlet to the world outside. I KNOW that's heavy but it's true! The point is: Jesse's birthday is coming up. The central consistent thing in pretty much my whole life is sharing headphones with her and listening to music. The soundtrack to my entire existence is her. I wish I had money and could buy her the best presents of all time, but I can make her the best playlist of all time. I want it to be so good it feels like magic. I want her to think I'm magic. I had another dream the other night. I don't remember much, just glitter. I must be crafting too much. Or looking at festival makeup tutorials. Or both.

November 12, 2018

WARNING- Weird thoughts ahead, lol.

I can never tell which feelings are normal, and which are me being a giant weirdo. But for as long as I can remember, I've had this feeling like every part of my body that's possible to have a ribbon tied around it, has a ribbon tied around it. It's so weird. I can't see the other end of the ribbons - how far they go. where they're attached, nothing. And sometimes it's fine, because sometimes I can hardly feel them. I can forget about them for days at a time, weeks, months if I'm lucky. But then other times I can feel them like, pulling at me. It's freaking spooky, to have something pulling at you from somewhere you can't see. I can't tell if it's pulling me toward whatever it is? Or if it's trying to warn me? Or if I'm just insane??

Does that make sense? Does anybody else feel that way? (she asks into the void)

So idk I guess this ribbons-feeling is why I'm really careful all the time. Like I'm just a careful person. Charlie tried to give me a hard time about it, and I can't be like "I don't wanna pull back in the ribbons too hard without realizing it and wreck something!" because he'd be like "WTF Marin, do we need to get you help?" But also, more and more, I want to be the opposite of careful. I want to take a pair of comically oversized scissors and cut the ribbons into so many pieces that nobody can even tell what they are any more.

I don't know why I'm such a freak, only that I am. I don't know why I can't leave 7 Monolith, only that I can't. But there must be a reason, even if I can't see it, and I feel like it makes sense that the ribbons-feeling is part of that reason, right?

There's just a lot.

January 15, 2019

Happy new year! Lol I forgot to write on the actual first day of 2019, but OH WELL!

I got this new glitter nail polish, thanks to the monthly makeup subscription box my "mom" sends me as an outlet for her abandonment guilt. It has like, every color glitter imaginable without quite reading as "rainbow" which is fine just not really what I was in the mood for and it's vaguely halographic and shifts into all these different colors depending on the light. I'm obsessed. Anyway.

I was putting on another layer because I chipped it like 20 minutes into wearing it, and all of a sudden I had this feeling like I recognized the glitter? Like I felt this thing way deep in my gut and for a minute I couldn't breathe. It's the closest thing I've felt to how books and movies make Christmas look. Like I was home, with family, cookies and cider and all that stuff. Familiar and safe. I almost didn't recognize that feeling. And it came from the nail polish. How weird is that.

I mean, I don't want to make it sound like I've had this awful Charles Dickens childhood - Rose and Charlie are the best ever and always there for me and I love them a lot. But things never feel like...home. You know?

My mom always says this cryptic stuff about how I'm "special" and I wanna strangle her because I'm not, but you try getting my mom to stop doing anything she wants to do. Rose told me once that one day, I would "lead the charge into a new era of existence and access" because I'm "of the Source" and I was like uhhhh okay?? Charlie mostly treats me pretty normal, except when I ask him questions about our family. my mom or any Dram. He knows that I want to know more about them and he's my only real entrypoint, but apparently he's like the black sheep of that whole family. He and my mom were close way back right before I was born, but now whenever she comes to visit he barely even looks at her.

So that's to say: nobody tells me anything, ever.

January 16, 2019

Okay this is so weird. I wrote that entry yesterday about glitter and then last night I dreamed about glitter. Then I woke up with purple glitter in my bed?? Like not a lot, so at first I thought it was from my nail polish, but it was just a handful of purely purple glitter that looks nothing like my nail polish. SO WEIRD!!!!!!

February 14, 2019

Rose has an old book full of "ye olde" style fairy tales, and I flipped through it for the first time in forever today.

Not so weirdly, I've always been drawn to the story of Rapunzel.

Rapunzel couldn't leave the tower, or else she'd break her neck and die.

Same.

February 19, 2019

I was reading this article the other day in one of the teen magazines my "mom" gets me a subscription to and it was all about body positivity, which is great, but it was basically just like "wear a crop top if you wannna wear a crop top! it doesn't matter what size you are! You go, girl!" And like, sure. Yes. I am all for that. But doesn't it seem like there are some steps missing in there? Like, I can physically put on a crop top and wear it outside. But how do I convince myself that everybody isn't looking at me and making fun of me in their minds? How do I unlearn the last almost-fifteen years? How do I get actually positive about my body, not just put on a crop top and fight the urge to cry all day?

It's the same thing like when my mom sends me brochures from the CEO camp she ten when she was my age (her dad started the camp for her, which is an insane thing just by itself, but she did all the work, which is even more insane) and she's like "Marin, you lack direction for your life" and I'm like, cool mom. Yeah. I can see that. What I can't see is how to get there from here.

March 2, 2019

This is what I want my life to look like, volume 2:

The walls of my room are covered in Polaroids of me and my friends. There are lots of mirrors in all kinds of shapes. hearts and moons and stars. There's a record player and a lot of vintage records by Billie Holiday and Lena Horne and Peggy Lee and Nina Simone. And Christmas lights! Everywhere! Lots of of pink and purple Christmas lights everywhere.

If I lived in this room, I'd have so many friends and be part of so many clubs. My best friend would have a collection of vintage cameras, and every place we go to that has a photo booth, we'd get photos taken. Every time I'd look at myself in one of those mirrors, I'd feel happy at what I see and never weird or sad. (Jesse hates taking pictures, so even when I actually do normal stuff with her there's no evidence. What even is a life supposed to be without evidence? That's not an actual question you need to answer Jesse, it's just a question)

Anyway, if I lived in this kind of room, my mom would probably be like, an art history professor at a liberal arts college. That's how come everything looks so cool, because I would know stuff about art. My mom and I would love to try new recipes together. We get each other new cookbooks for every special occasion, and right now we're working out way through a Moroccan one. Moroccan Mondays.

In actuality, there's a dust storm happening outside and my eyes sting.

March 9, 2019

Here's what I'm obsessed with lately.

Can. You. EVEN???

February 3, 2020

Omg I totally forgot this blog existed!!

I lost the password and instead of just resetting it I got in one of my super stubborn moods (Taurus moon lol) and just kept putting in guesses and jokes on me, it locked me out. Anyway, that's a boring story.

But my friend Ximena is really good at hacking and stuff, so she got me back in. Yeah you read that right - I have friends. Obviously a lot has happened since my last post. Ximena moved out here a couple months ago (X's family used to live here but they moved away a while ago) and she introduced me to Lora who I sorta-not-really already knew, and Jesse and I have been hanging out with them a ton. Jesse kind of more than me. Which is fine!!

Anyway I'm 15 now? If I lived somewhere normal I'd be psyched about almost being 16, because I'd get a car and have a Sweet Sixteen and eat a huge PINK cake, but I don't!

February 16, 2020

I read this fanfic the other night that was written in the second person so everything was like "you." "you're doing this" etc you know?

So... You go to a drive-in movie with Heartthrob Boy, and he spills soda on you by accident. And you take off your shirt ( you have a tank top on, don't worry) to clean it up, bit you're still all sticky and self-conscious about being sticky and HTB like... used his tongue to get it off??? AAHHHHH I'M DISGUSTING

but also I wonder if a boy will ever touch any part of me with his tongue

March 2, 2020

Hi I don't know if you heard but I have friends :)))

March 15, 2020

I think I'm so into painting my nails and doing my hair because those are things that always fit. I don't have to worry about places not carrying about a size 8, or places that carry XLs but when you read the measurements they're actually size 8s too and it's like jesus if that's an XL what am I

My "mom" was confused why I needed new pants because mine still look new, but I showed her the thigh holes and she was like "that's a weird place for a hole, how did that happen" and I realized that when your legs are a certain size, you just don't know about thigh rub and what it does to clothes. Pants could just last for years.

No matter what, I can paint my nails with a different color nail polish on every finger, and I can always do a braid crown. And I know I'm cute as hell, etc, so this is not a Marin Needs to Learn to Love Herself thing. It's just an UGH thing

April 17, 2020

So Rose does all these Source experiments on plants and flowers and stuff. Tbh, it's just one if those things I hardly even register anymore because it's just always there. She's explained to me a million times what Source is/does/means, but the way Rose explains things sometimes is just a LOT to take in and she refers to me as a "child of Source" but I kinda figure that's like "child of God" right? What else would that mean?

But anyway, it's really annoying because dried flowers are a part of my new aesthetic and I pinned a bunch of them up on my wall but I woke up this morning to a freaking jungle of very alive flowers. I freaked out. on Rose, and she Rose said she didn't do it and I was like WELL THEN WHO DID and she said that I did??

Which like. Obviously that doesn't make sense. I asked her what she meant and She just shook her head and said " It's happening. We should have known" which is some horror movie shit that she refused to elaborate on. I love to feel safe and normal!!

Or maybe it's not a horror movie at all. But maybe it's a superhero movie? Maybe there's some kind of origin story I don't know about yet, and all of this will be worth it once I figure out my powers. I wonder what my costume will look like. Lol.

April 23, 2020

Is it possible to die from longing? I know that sounds melodramatic, but I'm also kinda serious?? Because it seems like one of those things that could fester and get infected and kill you. It's like when you fall down and bang up your knee, and you need to put a band-aid on the scrape for a while, but THEN you need to air it out - but how do you know when you're supposed to do each one of those things? And if you do either one too much, your knee gets infected. What if I smother my heart with band-aids for too long and it gets infected? This isn't about anybody. I just keep having these dreams about someone I never expected to have dreams about and they're so intense that they keep leaking into my life and I wonder if I need to do something about them.

May 2, 2020

So Jesse's gotten really into metal music, and I tried to get her to play me something since, AS PREVIOUSLY ESTABLISHED, that's what we've literally ALWAYS DONE with music and each other, and she kinda looked at Ximena out of the corner of her eye and said like "I don't think it's really your thing" And it was the meanest thing anybody's ever said to me.

So later I looked up Zenion, the band she was talking about, and I listened to every single fucking song they've ever recorded turned up as loud as it could go with my own headphones that are better than hers anyway, and I loved it. And I didn't love it just because she said I wouldn't. I loved it because it was loud and weird and wild and when I listened to it it made me feel like it's not crazy when so feel stuff so hard it's like my heart's gonna vibrate out of my body. And I would have told Jesse all this and we could have shared it, but I guess she thinks just because I like HTB and glitter and stuff, I don't have the capacity for anything else.

She clearly doesn't know me at all. So much for any kind of whatever, why would she ever want to kiss someone she clearly sees as like a stupid baby.

May 7, 2020

The dreams are getting weirder and they're happening more. I'm getting scared to go to sleep. Not that the dreams are always scary (they almost never are, or not scary like in a typically scary horror movie way). I mean, I've only ever been me. I don't know what other peoples' dreams are like.

The other night in one I was jumping on a trampoline, which is something I've never done in real life. I told Rose about it when I woke up, and she said "do you even know how to jump on a trampoline?" and I said "Rose, it's not like riding a bike. You don't have to learn. You just jump." and then we got into this whole thing about how some things we just know, and jumping's one of them, and how that's so weird. Sometimes I really like talking to Rose about stuff.

May 19, 2020

So, it's prom season in the real world. If I lived somewhere normal, my prom dress would be pink with lots of tulle and silk flowers at the shoulders, and it would fit perfectly and trying in dresses would be fun and not anxiety-inducing.

But since there are only like 10 teenagers currently in 7MV, were not having a homecoming. Cool.

May 27, 2020

So, mom came to visit this weekend, and I asked her about her prom. She was Typical Cecelia at first, very "Prom is a waste of time and money, Marin. It's a night when lesser people play dress-up to engage with their aspirations of grandeur." And I was like eyeroll forever and just stopped talking. BUT THEN she actually talked to me like a human being. She was like, "I actually didn't go to my prom" and when I asked her why she said that she didn't have a date, and was very self-conscious about it. I almost passed out at her admitting that she's ever been anything less than perfect.

(gonna continue this in reblog)

#omega mart #marin dram #omega mart lore

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