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hcneymooners · 2 days ago

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౨ৎ stargirl interlude: chapter v.

wnba!paige x pop star!azzi. men & minors dni.

⋆ 🪩 masterlist.

cw: fluff, suggestive content, paige vs her self control, love declarations.

notes: hello, hello. had to update before i got jumped. wanted to post before i was consumed by the met gala. the song lyrics used belong to "scar for love" by niki & the dove. i hope you enjoy yourselves. love you. can't wait to see what you think.

V: COHERENCE.

“wait, we have three golden retrievers? baby, how big is our house?”

azzi smiled radiantly from the smooth face of paige’s phone screen. she shrugged, her hair sliding down her neck and across her shoulder. it was practically buoyant, highly teased for the upcoming single that azzi planned to release. she kept everyone, including paige, in the dark, telling her that it would matter more if she didn’t know a single thing about it.

paige wondered if that was the ethos of her brand as a star.

“i don’t know,” azzi teased. “how many acres could that wnba money get us?”

paige laughed, her face twisting into mock-outrage. “damn, ma. and here i thought you really loved me.”

azzi’s face softened, and she rolled onto her stomach, settling deeper into the body of her bed. the motion made her chest push up slightly, her tits high and glossy with glitter-infused body oil. paige’s eyes glazed over slightly at the sight.

“i do love you, baby. besides, i think i got more money in the bank anyway.”

paige tore her eyes away from azzi’s chest, and met her mischievous gaze blushing fervently when her girlfriend cocked an eyebrow as if to let her know she’d caught her.

“i know, mama. ‘m just playing.”

azzi pursed her lips and then pulled herself backward into an arch, the small of her back flashing a momentary, perfect peek of brown skin before she sat back with her thighs spread. paige muttered a prayer under her breath, pressing her eyes closed with a slow blink. azzi tilted her head, her cheeks flushing a little bit at the small groan that severed itself from paige’s chest.

“you know what i saw the other day?”

“a vision of me flying you out?” paige asked, eyes still closed. azzi laughed, and she opened them in satisfaction.

“no,” azzi answered, drawing the ‘o’ in the word out. “i saw on tiktok that they keep calling me mrs. bueckers. isn’t that so cute?”

paige wanted to die. no, it wasn’t fucking cute.

“yeah?” she murmured. “they calling you by my last name?”

something in her tone was predatory enough to hook azzi, making the other girl look at her with wide eyes. paige’s blue gaze was low-lidded and dark, her bottom lip almost bloodless underneath the press of her teeth. azzi felt her throat squeeze, and her thighs followed.

“um, yeah,” she said with a slight nod of her head.

paige let her lip fall free, her teeth chewing on the inside of her cheek instead. she studied azzi, azzi only barely changed from being on set today. azzi with her baby pink tube top and thrifted lululemon v-waisted yoga pants (she’d made that clear.) she thought of the text she’d gotten last week when azzi said she was thinking of getting lip fillers, which paige responded to in the following manner:

sending a selfie of her side-eyeing azzi heavily in response.

a second text in which she said: » 1 ml at most, otherwise i ain’t allowing it

a third and fourth text to follow up, in which she said: » just thought of how good its gonna feel to kiss you fuck

then: » i mean it's good already but imma bout to be insatiable lol

azzi had responded with a kissy emoji and then promptly shattered paige’s player dreams by saying:

» i’m afraid of needles :(

paige had laughed at that. but now, paige wasn’t playing. she’d been on one for several days, made worse by the memory of what it was like to have azzi live with her in dallas. and now, azzi was telling her about how the world saw azzi as paige’s wife.

“p?” azzi asked hesitantly, and paige refocused on her.

“i’m with you, baby. went somewhere for a minute.”

“where did you go?” and the way she asked was so sweet, so eager to follow paige across every mode of time and space. she’d probably even take the pain of it, punish herself, though paige found her highly unpunishable.

“just thinking about you, mama,” paige told her, voice throaty and low.

azzi smiled, pleased. outside, new york sang its song of life. cars droned on in the late-night traffic, and azzi’s eyes looked out of her window for a moment. paige studied the soft shape of her face and tried to remember what azzi smelled like when she came out of her shower for the first time in texas.

“you’re so sweet f’me, princess,” paige said, and azzi slid back onto her side, shifting her phone so that it all traveled with her.

“what do you mean?” azzi asked, huffing out a laugh. “i’m not even with you right now.”

“you’re always with me, azzi,” paige said, her tone firming into something serious. “i never let you go, physically here or not.”

it was true. azzi’s name was written on paige’s wrist tape before every game. she’d even tailored her brand-deal-gifted aromatherapy set to smell exactly how it did whenever azzi tucked her into her arms. paige ached for her at every moment. her biggest indulgence was being azzi’s favorite baby.

she thought of when azzi was last here, how paige had draped herself across azzi’s lap like she belonged there, face pressed to the soft plane of her stomach. her hand had traced idle shapes along azzi’s side, fingertips dragging light over warm skin, brushing just under the hem of her tank top. fresh from the shower, azzi’s curls had spilled damp and wild down her back, and she’d smelled saccharine—like something honeyed. familiar. paige had nosed at her ribcage lazily, kissed the skin there without really thinking about it.

her brain buzzed now with the ghost of azzi’s hum, with the phantom movement of the one hand carding through paige’s hair, slow and soothing. they’d stayed like that for hours, half-watching a movie neither of them would be able to recall.

azzi was paige’s permanent aftershock, a nuclear vibration that mutated her into something different. someone she liked a lot more than the version of herself, to whom azzi remained unknowable. she wanted azzi under her, inside of her, on top of her.

“everything makes sense when i’m looking at you,” she continued, blue eyes unyielding as she gazed into the screen.

she watched azzi shiver, a flash of perfect teeth biting into her lip.

it made something lurch in paige, some organic thing inside her chest pulling tight. she shifted, suddenly full of everything she couldn’t say quickly enough.

“i like bueckers-fudd better,” she said abruptly, and azzi blinked. “like the sound of it. looks real good on paper, too. or on the inside of a ring. on a deed.”

azzi’s smile flickered wider, not fully following.

“i want your name next to mine,” paige continued, voice picking up steam. “not just romantically, i mean. like legacy shit. your art, your writing, your music. i want us to build a whole empire off our last names touching. i mean, i’m already planning to buy your masters over time. i’m tryna make sure you own every piece of you. you know? you worked hard for it.”

azzi didn’t speak.

“baby?”

her screen was quiet, the faint city hum behind azzi like a mechanical tide. paige leaned forward. “ma?”

azzi shook her head slightly, her lips parted. her cheeks shone.

“oh. shit, wait, are you—baby. what’s wrong?”

“i love you so much,” azzi said, so quietly that paige almost missed it, “and i don’t even know what to do with any of it.”

paige went still, breath caught in her throat, heart wrung out like a rag. she didn't know how to say me too in a way that could entail the way that the love she carried was the only thing holding her down. so she just said:

“can you come home? to me? like, now. please.”

azzi sniffled and shook her head. “i’m sorry, p. i have rehearsals tomorrow and the final filming day for my new music video.”

paige groaned, her head falling back to reveal the white belly of her throat.

“if you can’t come to me,” she said, voice gone light and teasing, “can you pull your top down a little instead?”

“paige madison,” azzi gasped, scandalized, but already smiling, cheeks warm and eyes brimming with new joy.

paige laughed, the sound crooked and golden.

and azzi just looked at her. she often felt that paige wasn’t real, that she couldn’t be real, that it was impossible to hold all of this adoration without being prostituted by it, and yet there she was, laughing, like the sun had no other job but to kiss her teeth when she smiled.

paige blinked, and for a moment, it felt like she left her own body. like she was floating, carried by azzi’s gaze alone. she dreaded when they would have to hang up.

she always hated the come down.

⟡

pbueckersofficial: my girl is such a fucking crybaby, and she looks so pretty with it too. it be making me wanna fuck her up till her legs shake. 7:03 pm • likes: 1.2m | retweets: 243k | replies: 301k ⤷ username: did we forget the password to the priv AGAIN or...😭😭😭 ⤷ username: be fr we are ONE more tweet away from another WNBA-wide media training day. ⤷ username: paige bueckers saying “fuck her up” with no warning is why the government wants to ban twitter ⤷ username: just 0 decorum on my wifi. ⤷. karnold: girl, boo. she ain’t live with you ⤷ username: she's so real for this bc i too would want to make azzi fudd see white repeatedly ⤷ pbueckersofficial: trust, you won’t be seeing the morning. #stayblessed 😇 ⤷ username: IS THIS A THREAT OR???

pbueckersofficial: hoes mad bc they didn’t lock in like me 🤷🏼‍♀️💍 8:10 pm • likes: 1.1m | retweets: 500k | replies: 432k ⤷ username: HOES MAD BC YOUR SOCIAL MEDIA ACCESS IS GONNA BE TAKEN AWAY 😭😭😭 ⤷ username: this that libra bullshit. fall in love and immediately start tweeting like future ⤷ username: don’t invoke that demon’s name in this loving home ⤷ username: isn’t that hoe a scorpio?

pbueckersofficial: y’all be tweeting “you my peace” to someone who gave you a UTI. i’m not the same. 8:15 pm • likes: 944k | retweets: 132k | replies: 346k ⤷ dallaswingspr: your account could be at risk for temporary suspension for violating community guidelines. ⤷ pbueckersofficial: my b ⤷ azzi35: paige 😭😭😭😭😭😭 ⤷ pbueckersofficial: baby imy, call me back 💔💔

⟡

count on azzi to drop her most public declaration of love while sleeping right next to paige.

the day broke, pink and orange like a heart on fire, and paige blinked awake far earlier than she usually did. something hummed inside of her bones, her marrow thick and something sweet tugging at her mouth. she stayed still, lying on her back like a felled animal, with azzi’s head pillowed on her chest. she hadn’t yet put her finger on the pulse of what had dragged back into the land of the living.

beneath her, azzi murmured something incoherent. they hadn't even lasted a week before paige flew her out again.

the bonnet they’d grabbed at a beauty supply store had slipped off, but her scarf held strong against her bush of curls. her face was marked by pillow lines despite her gravitating away from them onto paige’s body. paige absentmindedly stroked a finger along her cheek, her nail catching along the delicate bones of her nose and cheeks. azzi pressed into it, as if she was trying to find her even in her deepest dreams, and the thought of that made paige run warm.

after a few more moments, paige carefully slid the other girl to the side and swung her legs over the edge of the bed. her feet touched plush carpet, and she grabbed the thin body of her phone, making sure to tuck the covers around azzi before padding into the bathroom. she turned it on, letting it vibrate on the countertop as notifications flooded in, and reached for her toothbrush. it was only after a steady five minutes of vibrations that she figured something might be wrong.

tucking a strand of soft blonde hair behind an ear, paige tapped the sleek face of the device, the screen blurring for a moment before it stabilized. she was already distracted, fingers restless against the sleek glass, as notifications flooded in. but one, sitting there with a quiet power above the rest, caught her attention.

youtube: new upload from azzi fudd.

her heart stopped for just a beat, a strange knot tightening in her chest. paige didn’t even think to hesitate. she clicked.

it was the silence at first that caught her. she didn’t recognize the setting when the video loaded, the screen dimmed at first, only to be pierced by the sharp gleam of neon pink sharp enough to make her flinch. azzi’s face filled the frame, framed against that pop of color like a strange, beautiful ghost. her curls were soft, pinned upward, and despite their careful arrangement, they still seemed to carry a slight wildness to them, as if this updo was nothing more than an act.

every movement was cold and precise, her hands pulling the air into sharp, geometric arcs. it was stunning in its simplicity. azzi was everywhere, but nowhere all at once, moving like she knew every inch of herself. like she had to.

paige’s chest tightened as she watched azzi, this girl who liked to seem so small when they were together, this woman who was now reminding the world that she was a fucking popstar. the popstar.

she watched azzi’s body twist and propel itself across the stage, dipping and bending while azzi kept intense eye contact with the camera as it dared to follow her. paige licked her lower lip as she followed the soft sweep of the body suit, its thin cover as it dipped between azzi’s thighs.

there was an aching vulnerability in azzi’s movements, the way her body tensed and then unraveled, like a machine coming apart under its own weight. paige could see it in the way azzi moved. her eyes slipped closed for a moment, head tilted back just enough to expose the delicate line of her throat, vulnerable, but also so very controlled. she balked, stumbling forward on the balls of her feet like she was on the edge of a large cliff. her body strained over and over, always so close to breaking, but instead, managing to weave itself into a new shape.

azzi sang to herself. it was clear that she was alone in this, spinning like a solo planet even as she bled her heart out for the world to see.

it's either with or against you and nothing left to say / 'cause all you ever got was hurt.

there was a madness to it, a quiet destruction that paige couldn’t shake. she had never seen azzi like this, and maybe that’s what unnerved her most: how easily the world consumed her. how easy it was for azzi to give it all up, even when every part of her seemed to be begging to hold it together.

we mark each other’s hearts / with a scar for love.

it wasn’t just the vulnerability that caught paige off guard; it was how effortlessly azzi embodied it. how easily she could twist herself into something so raw and exposed, and make it seem like the most natural thing in the world. and maybe it was.

azzi had once told her that she despised her inability to be indifferent to anything: the critics, the fans, her mother, her management. azzi was a masterclass in caring above the norm. everything kicked her while she was still down, and sometimes she rolled over to let the world get a clean hit in.

as if to drive the point home, azzi fell off-screen. she hit the floorboards with a tough thud before the camera spun to display her face twisted in electric pain as she crawled across the space. her voice never faltered, its pilgrimage from her throat to the outside world uninterrupted.

paige watched as azzi swung herself up into a crouch just before she hit a wall, stumbling dramatically back before gliding into a gorgeous moonwalk-esque promenade. she faced the camera, jaw strong and proud as she pointed mockingly with a bejeweled acrylic tip and then turned it back to herself, mimicking the action of slitting her throat.

draw a line, sister / draw it deep / do not stop until we bleed.

but there was more. a shift. the camera pulled back, the screen flickering, and for a moment, something different filled the space.

a video. a video of someone blonde. it took a few moments for paige to recognize that it was herself, but from behind. this was clearly a moment that azzi had captured when they were together because paige was laughing, unguarded and helpless in her adoration. it was clear that both women were slaves to love.

as it continued, paige glanced back in slow motion, her eyes crinkling with the softest smile, the kind of smile that made a heart stop in its tracks. paige watched herself stand there as the camera zoomed out, her face falling slightly with the smallest of smiles, the kind that only azzi could pull out of her.

and then, in a fluid motion, azzi stepped closer to the projected image of paige, the video shimmering against the dark backdrop. there was something tenderly desperate in the way azzi approached the screen, like she was walking into a game she knew she’d most likely lose. she sped up, tripping into an unbalanced run. just as she grew close enough to touch, she tilted forward and slammed into the wall with both hands, palming the projection of paige.

she slid down the wall, her body sinking to the floor with a tragic grace that made paige let out a small, wretched gasp. azzi turned and slowly began to curl into herself, leaving just enough time for her audience to see the blood snaking languidly down her cupid’s bow. it fell into her mouth with a sick drip, and continued as she ended it all with a head buried in her knees, as if she couldn’t bear to look at the memory she had just tried so futilely to keep for herself.

the screen went dark. and then there it was: nothing but the numbers 10.20 flickering softly on the black screen in baby pink, italicized serif. the numbers lingered like a kiss print.

the date. it took paige a moment to process.

10.20.

she blinked, disoriented, the weight of it sinking in.

the new album. azzi was releasing it on her birthday. the significance of it hit her all at once, staggering like an unexpected blow. she had watched azzi bare her soul, shed her skin, and now she understood why. this wasn’t just a love song. this wasn’t just azzi doing what she did best.

paige thought of the blood dripping down azzi’s full-glam face, the way she hadn’t wiped it but had hidden it so that the hot, crimson line could continue staining her. she thought of what azzi had texted her just a few weeks ago:

» i can’t be normal about you » i want to hollow myself out, so i can keep you inside of me forever » i don’t care if it sounds crazy, but i don’t want to be anything other than yours. every time i’m alone, every time i’m without you i feel like i’ve made a wrong turn somewhere. » it's like i'm supposed to be going home, but i missed my turn.

paige stared at the screen, the room feeling suddenly too small around her. her chest felt tight, too tight, and her fingers trembled as she wiped away the sudden tears that slipped down her cheeks.

fuck, she loved that girl.

just in the other room, azzi was sleeping deeply. the sunrise stretched like a fresh wound on the wall.

⟡

azzi35: for p. ❤️‍🔥 new album out 10.20 4:44 am • likes: 4.7m | retweets: 1.3m | replies: 828k

popcrushdaily: azzi fudd just released the most daring visual of her career. vulnerable, unrelenting, and devastatingly beautiful. this is a popstar who isn’t afraid to show her scars, both literal and metaphorical. “scar for love” feels like it’s pulling at the heartstrings of every single person who’s ever loved and lost. 10.20 can’t come fast enough. #azzifudd #scarforlove • likes: 6.8m | retweets: 2.2m | replies: 1.4m ⤷ username: oh so grammy secured iktr!

arvind__music (music critic): the perfect example of how a popstar can make you feel uncomfortable, moved, and seen all at once. azzi fudd is making history with this drop. her vulnerability is unmatched, her vision untouchable. we are witnessing the birth of something transcendent. #scarforlove • likes: 33k | retweets: 15k | replies: 8.6k

carmenintheclouds (celebrity choreographer): azzi fudd never fails to have a visual hand that is so on point. from the neon pink to the choreography, everything is tight. and that final scene? don't even get me started on the symbolism. scar for love is art, people. #azzifudd #scarforlove • likes: 12k | retweets: 4.6k | replies: 2.2k

pbueckersofficial (quote replying to azzi35): fuckkkkkkk i love her. 6:20 am • likes: 3.2m | retweets: 326k | replies: 999k ⤷ pbueckersofficial: she put my whole heart in 3 minutes and 47 seconds. what do i even do with myself now? ⤷ pbueckersofficial: i’m supposed to go to practice after hearing that? be fr ⤷ pbueckersofficial: i need to propose. like now. i need to propose TODAY. FAWK ⤷ pbueckersofficial: mind you she’s stil sleeping imma bout to [redacted] ⤷ pbueckersofficial: if this was the bachelor i would’ve given her the final rose S2E1, timestamp 0:30. ⤷ karnold: so you really said fuck that priv huh

wnbagossip: lmao paige bueckers never fails to be the realest out there ⤷ username: when she said “fuck i love her”... we all felt that. ⤷ pbueckersofficial: ain’t nobody got her like i got her, trust

bueckersfuddsourcebrasil: bueckers-fudd nation, how are we feeling now that miss “i’m private” just went PUBLIC?? • likes: 6.5k | retweets: 536 | replies: 1.3k ⤷ username: azzi said here damn! ⤷ username: first strap pregnancy is coming in october ‎‎⤷ ‎ pbueckersofficial: #realshit ⤷ azzi35: paige, please put the phone down and come out of the bathroom, i wanna give u a kiss ⤷ pbueckersofficial light ain’t got nothing on how fast im about to move

#mine ; 🐎.#pazzi popstar au.#pazzi fics #pazzi #paige x azzi #paige bueckers #azzi fudd #uconn wbb #uconn huskies #dallas wings

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777rare · 1 month ago

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THE Ahtkuymas METHOD~

How is each month going to be for you?

My Solar Return observation.

Imma a bit delulu but if this method is a success, please call it...The Ahtkuymas method~

(I'm wheezing😂😭)

!LONG POST AHEAD BY THE WAY!

THESE NOTES ARE ONLY A STUDY OF MINE AND HAS/HAS NOT BEEN PROVEN YET, SO IF IT DOES NOT RESONATE WITH YOU, FORGIVE ME AS IT WAS ONLY A STUDY/OBSERVATION OF MINE.

I DO NOT PLAGIARIZE, COPY OR REWORD ANY OF MY FELLOW ASTROLOGY OBSERVERS POSTS AND I DEMAND THE SAME IN RETURN.

A note:

So guys, before you come for me, telling me Lunar Return Chart is available for this monthly prediction, yes. I do know we read the Lunar Return Chart for that but I wanted to know how one could read their months in a yearly chart as well.

Lunar Return Charts provide an in depth prediction of one's month but Solar Return Chart also made me drawn to just generally understanding what a person can expect for each month overall.

Yes, the placements in a Solar Return Chart will function throughout the year but each placement reaches its peak in that particular month and works very actively in that month compared to the entire year.

I wanted to read my SRC a bit differently this time. I wanted to know how one could understand how each month would be for them in a year. I then had a thought...maybe I could try this method and study whether all of my past months in the past years have an accuracy with this method.

Yes, I did find a mind-blowing accuracy so I wanted to share this method with you all as well. It is very simple and anyone can read their SRC easily with this method but I do want to remind you that this is just a method I have observed so if it isn't accurate, forgive me as I'm not professional astrologer.

I really do hope you enjoy this though...i will provide steps and examples from my own Solar Return chart.

Also...

I named this the 'Ahtkuymas method' because I made this name up when I was a small child. So yeah, I'm honouring my childhood self rn lol. It's pronounced as the 'Ath-ku-i-maas' method btw.☺️❤️‍🔥

STEP 1:

First of all, you must know what zodiac sign you are by your birth date.

Zodiac sign dates:

Aries: March 21 – April 19

Taurus: April 20 – May 20

Gemini: May 21 – June 21

Cancer: June 22 – July 22

Leo: July 23 – August 22

Virgo: August 23 – September 22

Libra: September 23 – October 23

Scorpio: October 24 – November 21

Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21

Capricorn: December 22 – January 19

Aquarius: January 20 – February 18

Pisces: February 19 – March 20

Example: I am born on 16th of February so my zodiac is Aquarius.

STEP 2:

Now, see where your birth zodiac sign is sitting in the Solar Return Chart.

Ex:

In this Solar Return Chart, my Aquarius is sitting in the 3rd house.

Now, wherever your zodiac sits is where the months of the year begin. For example since my Aquarius is in the 3rd house, the months will begin like so:

3rd house = January

4rth house = February

5th house = March

6th house = April

7th house = May

8th house = June

9th house = July

10th house = August

11th house = September

12th house = October

1st house = November

2nd house = December

Also, please be sure whether Whole Sign chart or Placidus chart works accurately for you beforehand before trying this method. It is very important.

EVIDENCE OF ACCURACY (Observations):

Okay, I'll use at least 2 Solar Return Charts to explain few placements that fell in which month and what experiences took place for me at that time.

I will just give a few months cuz of the overflowing of tea 😂😭

My 2022 Solar Return Chart:

Moon being in the month of July was when I was so unsteady and so damn emotional. Like that was the month I kept crying and crying because of an incident that took place. I had Leo Moon conjunct Vertex in the 9th house and yes, a lot of my personal information was revealed to the public (my classmates and teachers) in this month (Leo effect along with vertex being the significant event). And uhh...I was the one who revealed it because I had too many sleeping pills which made me very unsteady and unconscious of my actions at that moment, I just blabbered my entire dark life to whoever was there.

August month being ruled by Virgo (mercury being the ruler in Aquarius 3rd house). wherever Virgo sits is where you are the most picky or have a lot of suspicion on and also where you have to work to be accepted, yes..that month I spent a lot of time trying to do things to be accepted by others, especially my friends. I feel out of a friendship which I a had for a very long time and I did make new friends whom I tried to fit in with and I knew they were hiding a lot from me, very suspicious of them.

September month being ruled by Libra and in the 11th house (libra ruler Capricorn venus in 2nd house) I did have a new crush here who was my friend's friend. I fantasized about marrying him and it was quite sudden (the Groom effect). This was a hard crush and it didn't end so well. Yes, I asked his number and texted him (11th house significance) once but he never really replied because he didn't like me back so I left it at that (probably the Groom squaring mercury effect).

Also Capricorn is a zodiac sign who is known for not taking shit from people whereas I am a person who takes others shit no matter how bad but this shockingly changed here.

☕ HOT TEA TIME☕ :

I once went to his classroom after my friend told me how bad she felt when he called her "Sam's body' which kinda meant I was sending her to get info on him which was not true cuz Im not creepy and I got hella pissed. Not because he told that about me, but because he hurt my friend. So I went to his classroom during his class, called out his name in front of the entire classroom and told him we needed to talk right that second and he gave a gesture saying he was doing his work and I told him I don't care. He came out and I gave him a sound scolding for doing such things. Not like that bad but I told him if he wasn't comfortable being my friend he could have just said so instead of spreading fake ass shit and talking down on my friends and he was speechless😭😂 (Capricorn Venus effect baby😂).

Scorpio being over the 12th house. I was in an extreme emotional turmoil in the month of October because of how my crush left me feeling Even though I scolded him (Scorpio ruler, Mars in 2nd house conjunct Venus and Pluto in 2nd house conjunct Mercury). I felt worthless and my self esteem dropped down so so badly. I was also very closed off but very emotional in private. Like I had so so much mental pain and emotional damage.

I'll jump to overall of December... there is Capricorn over the 2nd house and ruler, Saturn is in Aquarius in the 3rd house. Now, I met someone online in this month (Union in 2nd house conjunct 3rd house Aquarius mercury) and he was few years older to me, there was an evident age gap (capricorn). It was online mostly because the ruler of the 2nd house, Saturn, was in Aquarius with Aquarius mercury conjunct Union. Yes, this was the significant event that took place in this month. Yes, the connection was taboo and something I was sopposed to not involve myself in (union conjunct Pluto, Pluto conjunct mercury) The result is seen in the next SRC chart, 2023 where I check the placement of my Aquarius and count that as January and moving on.

My 2023 Solar Return Chart:

January being in the 12th house, having Pluto, sun and Mercury was the month where I was going to have a lot of my personal or taboo stuff exposed online (Capricorn Pluto conjunct Aquarius mercury). I was in a lot of drama and mess that month. I was going to have my reputation completely destroyed all because of some shitty guy online...the one I met on december and luckily I got myself out of it...with a lot of struggle (sun conjunct Saturn)

February was the month I began changing drastically as a person. Yes, I was more secretive and auspicious of people and I was very vulnerable and emotional that month (pisces over 1st house). I was also very much elevating spiritually.

March was the month where I paid a lot of attention to my studies and knowledge. I was also sharing my knowledge with others, like a guru does to his pupils lol. Yes, I actually had few People with whom I shared spiritual knowledge as a way to distract myself from the trauma and pain I had recently been through. This month was also the time I only spent time healing my wounds and had been wounded more.

April was the month I suddenly travelled a lot (3rd house = short distance travel) and those trips also changed me for the better (Taurus ruler being in the 1st house). The trip was expensive and lavish which also explains the Taurus over this house. I traveled to another state in my country so it is just Short Distance Travel. I also had significant events take place Here that changed my life's course extremely. It was like a new chapter in the book and I let go of the old chapter.

The month of May was a struggle for me because I began getting into arguments and fights with my mom and my family in general. I began feeling very uncomfortable around my elder brother since this month too. I was not at all in a good mood in this month and had horrible mood swings. I was pissed of 24/7, was always getting into fights with others, and was always complaining for nothing lol. I had a lot of problems with my friends too (Gemini) but my friend humbled my ass and told me I was so draining to be around and this further hurt me and I felt the need to change myself.

This one is very interesting, I met my romantic suitor in the month of June and cancer ruler being in the 10th house in Sagittarius is really fascinating because the guy was a Sagittarius. Anyways, I was also very emotional in the month of June, I was very emotional and I began to change into a more caring and loving person towards others. Cancer ruler conjunct Fama is the reason I began becoming known by many and popular because of my change of behaviour and welcoming nature.

Funny thing is, I began falling in love with this romantic suitor in the month of July. Leo being over this house with Destinn in this house made me experience such fated events which clearly felt like it was destiny that I met this man in my life and began falling so deeply in love with him, it was a crush in the beginning of course. My health also changed again and I began losing a lot of weight. (Leo ruler, Sun in the 12th house, the house of losses).

August month was very significant and full of work for me (Vertex and Virgo over this house) and it mainly circulated around the love that kept growing into a deep internal commitment to this person [7th house] (meaning I didn't tell him). I also faced significant events with my open enemies where she was clearly trying to take the guy away from me and it seemed to work which I was sad about but didn't do anything about. I was suspicious of my open enemies and even this guy I was falling in love with because I was doubtful about being liked back by him. I was overthinking so so much this month and had gotten so many dreams about this guy...he deeply impacted my subconscious and I couldn't go a day without having him settled in my brain (Virgo ruler, mercury in the 12th house). I even began writing in my diary because of him and about him of course.

~ FEW NOTES:

✓Always check the months falling in your 6th, 8th and 12th house because that month will be kinda tiring and there will be some sort of struggle that month. In Vedic astrology we call these houses the Dusthana Houses. They are called that because of how much pain and suffering these houses hold:-

6th house has got to do mainly with physical suffering and pain such as health issues and diseases. All about one's health and everyday life.

8th house has got to do mainly with very very harmful obstacles and extreme transformation All about intimacy, depth and spirituality.

12th house is the house of mental suffering, painful losses, betrayal and a lot of suffering that seems endless. All about addictions, secrets, pain and spirituality.

✓Where your True Node sits is the month where you will face and extremely impacting event that will change the course of direction in your life or will be the main contribution to your path moving forward so do not ignore that.

✓Wherever Moon and Mercury sits is the month you will be very unstable in some way or that month will be very unstable for you. You will also likely be very moody during that month and the months connected to these planets and you can overthink a lot with the mercury and become very emotional and moody with the moon.

✓Vertex also plays a very important role in understanding the month you will have very evidently significant events in your life. Especially when they conjunct a planet.

✓ I always notice that I meet significant people who will impact my life or will be there in my life forward a long time in the month that falls on my 10th house when the 10th house has a planet. Even when another house is connected to the 10th house (ex: Leo 4rth house (suppose March is in this house) sitting in the 10th house, I will meet someone significant in the month of March.

>> How and in what way does the significant person impact you can be seen by where the planets ruling sign is placed. Example: I have Cancer over the 5th house (suppose April falls here) and my Moon is sitting in the 10th house, I will meet this person in the month of April or the month falling in the 10th house. Also, this person will impact my love life or romantic journey, even my creativity for that matter (5th house themes).

I mentioned 👇this👇 in my Solar Return Chart post last time, but I'll type it down here as well for those who need it. For the placement of the zodiacs, it indicates the month being:

ZODIAC AND ITS IMPACT ON THE HOUSES:

Where ♈ is, is the month you are brave, come first, are energetic and self-oriented. The month where you take a lot of action too.

Where ♉ is, is the month you are very stingy or when you are the most possessive of certain things or people, sensual, comfortable and dependable.

Where ♊ is, is the month you are fluent, curious, clever, seen as charming and communicate a lot. Will be very talkative. You can be spoken a lot about too.

Where ♋ is, is the month you will get pampered a lot, nurtured and protected or what/who you protect. You can even nurture and love the person connected to the house.

Where ♌ is, is the month you will have a lot of focus on you, when and where you tend to get creative, are adventurous, generous, have exciting experiences, and take risks (can also show who you take risks for)

Where ♍ is, is the month you try to be of service, when you are the most sceptical, doubtful and have to work to be accepted.

Where ♎ is, is the month you are cooperative, diplomatic, keep trying to find a balance, and are even competitive.

Where ♏ is, the month you feel compulsive or obliged to take care of certain things, when you get more into depth of the house topic and so on, experience a lot of intensity, when you keep secrets, what areas of your life you keep secrets about that month.

Where ♐ is, is the month you are more optimistic, crazy, fun, adventurous, and are liked by everyone. Also when and where you expand to new horizons.

Where ♑ is, is the month you are very serious, responsible, formal and even choosy and take no shit from others.

Where ♒ is, is the month you are quite the rebel, are independent, when you think a lot about the future, and when you are truly you.

Where ♓ is, is the month you are compassionate, sensitive, merciful, the month you dream of a lot, and possibly even wishes pertaining that area come true if you just dream about it.

For the significance of degrees (image from Pinterest):

✓The chart ruler is very important in the SOLAR RETURN CHART to know overall what does the events revolve around that topic. Example: Leo ascendant means the events in the year and months overall revolve around love, romance, fun, creativity, the heart, etc. The ruler (SUN) sitting in 6th house indicates these areas affecting your health or meeting new romantic suitors where you work.

A TIP:

To understand the events better always connect the house ruler into your prediction along with aspects and signs as well, just like I mentioned in my examples above👆.

Try examining a future chart and make note of predictions. Then let that year arrive and let the predictions unfold in front of your eyes. Let me know how accurate this works out for you guys❤️

ANALYSING MY FUTURE SOLAR RETURN CHART

I'll come back with my experience after I see how well the predictions manifested:

Okay, so January, February and March are already over...I mean we're almost at the end of March now so I'll share my experience and then I'll continue with the prediction. I'm so excited!!😆 I will return with my experience of the predicted months as well guys, so stay tuned✨👏.

EXPERIENCE:

Mind you, this method is used to just check how and what would happen overall during each month and does not go so deep as the lunar return chart does.

My chart has Leo ascendant and my Sun is sitting in my 6th house conjunct Mercury in the 7th house. So this year, all the events will revolve around romance, creativity, fun, etc. Themes connected to the 7th house being relationships, partnerships, etc. will also affect me and my health (7th Mercury conjunct 6th Sun). Overall health and romance are the main theme of this year for me.

January is in my 6th house having Pluto, Sun, Destinn and Libby. The minute my year began I got sick. I was really really sick and I was puking so much. The 6th house is one's physical health and Pluto being there just made me fall ill out of nowhere. It was like the Tower Card. I was so healthy and suddenly I feel I'll the next day, it was very unexpected. Pluto conjunct Destinn manifested as me knowing the sickness was a sign from the universe about a new beginning. In last year December I was getting signs and weird premonitions Outta nowhere and this was the final confirmation for me to let go of what has ended in the past.

February is in the 7th house with Pisces Saturn and Mercury. This was the month where someone confessed their feelings for me before saying goodbye🥲👏 (mercury in the 7th was the loving confession while Saturn was the goodbye lol). I tried getting over him because he was a long term love of mine and I met a lot of people online but it never worked out with any of them even if it was the shortest of the short connections lol. I downloaded a few dating apps (Pisces Mercury conjunct Aquarius Sun) and deleted them within a day I tried getting into a relationship and it never happened (Saturn in 7th).

March month is in 8th house with Aries Chiron, Venus, Fama and Pisces Neptune and True Node. This month I did travel for 3 days and this trip, even though short, had a massive impact on me and I learnt a lot of lessons (True Node in Gemini degree, 27° in 8th house). I was recognised a lot for my beauty where I was told I had a very photogenic appearance and I should go into modelling (Venus conjunct Neptune in 8th house with fama). I was very active and took a lot of action this month too (Aries effect). I met a lot of people in the trip too and they taught me these lessons (again, True Node impact). This trip was also an extremely spiritual trip, like a pilgrimage (8th house themes).

WHAT I CAN EXPECT IN THE NEXT FEW MONTHS:

APRIL - April month is in the 9th house having Taurus Uranus and Vertex. I will be traveling in this month and it will be long distance, like to another state or country. It will be sudden travel, like one I didn't plan and was suddenly taken to (Uranus in the 9th house). Significant events will take place this month which will make me level up when it comes to my beauty and femininity (Vertex in Taurus).

Even the Taurus sign ruler, Venus, being in the 8th house indicates my growing sensuality and also me having the fear that the events that took place on March would repeat again on this trip (sorry, too personal to share what happened). I will also be leveling up spiritually and will learn a lot of new things. I can also get new unexpected gifts and stuff, probably even technological devices (Taurus Uranus conjunct Vertex).

Uranus conjunct MC indicates literal change and elevation in my public image. Sudden breakthroughs are much likely and it can quite impact my personality uncomfortably though, it's the kind of change that makes me uncomfortable in some way (Uranus Square ascendant). Also since Uranus in 23° (Aquarius degree) I will most likely suddenly have significant events with people online and I will also elevate very uniquely.

I will definitely have extremely new experiences this month, probably even doing things I've never done in my life before. This house ruler in the 8th house does give me the feeling that I'm gonna be hella horny this month and I'm gonna be very intimate with someone or in general (idk who gurl, let's just see), especially since it's Venus and I will have or take some sort of intimate action because my house ruler is in Aries.

MAY - The month of May is in the 10th house having Gemini Jupiter and Groom. Since Jupiter is in the 10th house, I will be paid a lot of attention to in the public eye this month. It doesn't have to just be where I study or work, even while I'm walking in the streets, people will stare, it's like all the eyes are on me. This is because of the radiant energy I will vibrate in this month, it's very divine and pure, one full of life. That's why people will feel quite drawn to my energy and appearance, thus keeping their eye on me.

I will again travel a lot this month but it will be short distance (Gemini). I will speak a lot during this month or also be very influential online (Jupiter in 11°). Jupiter in Gemini also Indicates me being spoken a lot about by others this month, I'll be the topic of a LOT of Gossip. I will also most likely meet someone from my past (Gemini ruler in 7th house, a house that's falls behind this house which gave methe feeling of past returning back to the present and Groom falling in this house too). I can also meet a new romantic suitor or reunite with an old one but this is a man who will be very understanding towards me (Jupiter sextile Venus). I can also have wishes granted or prayers answered this month (Gemini ruler, Mercury in Pisces).

JUNE - The month of June is in the 11th house having Cancer Mars. I already know that this month is gonna be full of fights and arguments with my family members especially my elder brother (Cancer). I will also get into a lot of arguments and clashes with my friends and possibly even online drama (Mars in 11th house). Cancer ruler being in the 2nd house can also hinder my security, I won't feel safe this month. I will be very guarded and stingy even. Mars in Leo degree will make me very focused on my hair growth and my creativity, I will be very ambitious when it comes to this, this month. Although, Moon Quintile Mars suggests I will be very sexually active this month and can have extremely new sexual experiences (Moon in 0°). I will even probably have someone wanting to put their baby in me (Mars in Cancer aspect Moon effect). Not necessarily but we'll see...anyways, the month of June will be a very rocky month for me overall and I'll be pretty active that month. I will also have a lot of new experiences with my family and my mother specifically (Moon in 0°).

Well, thankyou for reading through this today, I really hope you all enjoyed this!! ☺️❤️

Also, even though you are born on the middle or last months of the year, you can move to the next chart and begin counting the months from January starting with your zodiac sign.

For example: If you are born on the month of November, your chart would start at November _date_ 2025 in your 2025 SRC, still, start counting January from your zodiac sign till December and then shift to the next chart. I have tried this method with my friends charts and they have shared their relatability as well. It has worked wonders.

I know, a lot of critics will come my way but every method we use today was once a 'first time' for the creator. If we don't expand our mind to new horizons like the creators of many astrological methods did, then those methods wouldn't exist today..I'd like to end it at that😊💝.

Have a wonderful day ahead!!✨

All the images used above apart from my Solar Return Charts are taken from online sources and do not belong to me. All credits go to the original creators.

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7s3ven · 10 months ago

Text

GREEK ROMANTIC. luke castellan

IN WHICH… luke castellan joins an exchange program to visit camp jupiter for sword fighting experience but ends up spending most of his time with a girl from said roman camp.

Warnings : lowkey loser! Luke, kinda long… so uh yeah, Luke kinda thirsts over reader (he’s 19 and has spent most of his time in a camp, he does not get girls), i worked on this for like a week (PLZZZ READ AND LIKE AND COMMENT AND SUBSCRIBE 🫡), less strict version of Camp Jupiter

—

idea inspired by @the-empty-refrigerator !

I literally do classical studies, this is perfect for me to yap abt my roman knowledge. I have no idea what Camp Jupiter looks like so imma just use my Roman architecture knowledge for this. THIS IS MY FIRST LUKE FIC IN A WHILE LOL.

( disclaimer : info will differ from this fic to the canon plot bc i don’t know much abt camp jupiter )

In all honesty, Luke was a little nervous. He had willingly signed up for an exchange program between Camp Half-Blood and Camp Jupiter but now that he was on his way to the latter, he was anxiously bouncing his leg.

Years ago, there was a thick mist between the two camps due to previous events involving bloody wars. Now, that mist was lifted and the campers were free to sign up for an exchange program to visit the other.

Luke was wondering why he had agreed to sign up in the first place. Chiron promised he’d gain further experience in sword fighting, but warned that it wouldn’t be easy.

Camp Half-Blood prided itself on its friendly approach. Camp Jupiter was anything but that. Their campers were rugged, harsh, and disciplined by Lupa, the wolf who raised Romulus and Remus. Of course, their war-like nature made sense because the camp was founded on bloodshed when Romulus slayed Remus.

Luke lifted his head, looking around to see if he could spot anyone in a purple shirt. He was waiting on the side of the road, looking rather pathetic and sad to those passing by.

A black car with tinted windows rolled to a stop in front of Luke, and the car jolted open. “Are you Luke Castellan?” The demigod inside asked. Luke slowly nodded his head. “Hop in.” There was a bit of awkward shuffling from Luke to squeeze past the unnecessary amount of swords in the car. “So, how’s Camp Half-Blood?” The demigod driving questioned, looking at Luke through his shaded sunglasses.

“Good…” Luke was secretly relieved that someone was talking to avoid an awkward car ride. “Probably less demanding than Camp Jupiter, though. I’ve heard horror stories of your training from campers.”

The boy laughed as he sharply turned around a corner. “Yeah. It’s pretty bad. Made me wish I was a normal kid when I had to do all those pushups.” He paused before starting a new conversation. “Do you workout? Because you’ve got some nice muscles. Not to be weird or anything.”

“Uh, yeah.” Luke cleared his throat, “I sort of have to. Being a swordsman and all that.”

The other demigod whistled. “Must be hard, man. I’m Sohan, by the way. Son of Mercury, Hermes for you.”

Luke leaned forward, “I’m son of Hermes. That makes us like… distantly related or something.” Sohan laughed and tilted his head back.

“I like you, Castellan. Mind if I call you Luke?”

“Go ahead.”

The rest of the drive was each demigod taking their turn to explain different parts of their camps. Luke realized that Camp Jupiter didn’t have all the fun activities Half-Blood had. Though, there was a more bloody version of Capture the Flag.

“So you know how you have camp councillors, right? We have something similar but we call them praetors. They’re basically the leaders of the camp.” Sohan explained as he bit into his sugary chocolate bar. “We have two at a time, one girl and one guy.”

“So there’s only two leaders?” Luke questioned while opening the wrapping of his cheeseburger.

“Praetors are the highest leaders. Other than that, we have centurions, augurs, and quaestors. It’s confusing, I know, but you’ll get the hang of it. You don’t really need to know what everybody does, just who’s who.”

It was all too confusing for Luke.

“Our current male praetor is also a son of Mercury, his name’s Jae. Our other one is a daughter of Venus, Aphrodite for you. I think.” Sohan paused before shaking his head, dismissing his doubt. “We all thought she was kind of crazy for going after the position. That’s when I learnt to never underestimate a child of Venus because they are brutal.” Sohan chuckled as the car finally came to an abrupt halt.

Luke peeked out the window, gazing at the tall trees. Past the thick forest, he could faintly see a river.

Sohan grabbed the swords from beside Luke, sheepishly chuckling. “New sword delivery.” He uttered, “Didn’t have time to put them away. Some are still in a box.”

Luke merely hummed as he hopped out of the car. “Need help?” He questioned. He took a handful of swords from Sohan’s pile, easily supporting their weight. Sohan carefully stacked a box on top of everything else before nodding.

“You know, if I was a girl or gay, I’d have a crush on you.” Sohan uttered as the pair walked through the forest. “How do the girls at Half-Blood like you?”

“I’ve been chased multiple times. That should say it all.” Nothing was scarier to Luke than a hoard of girls sprinting towards him on Valentine’s Day.

“That’s the Tiber River.” Sohan pointed out as Luke stumbled into a sunny clearing. “The river that Romulus and Remus were thrown into.” Sohan led the way towards small, slightly unstable bridge. He effortlessly walked over it, ignoring the way the rickety wood creaked.

Luke sighed, having no choice but to follow after Sohan unless he wanted to swim.

“I’ll be the one showing you around. I just have to drop these swords off with the praetors, or at least one of them, and then we can begin.” Sohan piped up. He was shorter than Luke with shiny black hair and olive skin. Luke assumed he was Asian with the slight accent peeking through and the red-inked tattoo on his shoulder displaying a dragon with Chinese characters.

“Praetor!” Sohan suddenly shouted. Luke spotted the H/C-haired girl as she turned around, in the middle of talking with another camper. Luke couldn’t instantly tell who her mother was.

“Oh, the swords. Soldier, go find Praetor Jae.” Y/N hurried the other girl off before jogging towards Sohan.

“This is Luke Castellan. The exchange camper.” Sohan said, trying to gesture towards Luke. The action caused the box on top of the swords to slip. It opened, a group of swords toppling out.

Luke was quick to react. Instead of attempting to catch every sword, he simply grabbed Y/N and pulled her side before the swords could skewer her.

There was a second of silence before Sohan spoke up. “I apologise for my clumsiness, Praetor.” He immediately crouched down to rearrange the weapons, his movements so fast Luke thought they were rehearsed.

Y/N pressed her lips into a thin line as she stared at the swords on the ground. Her gaze flickered to Luke, who still had a tight grip on her arm. “Luke Castellan, right?” She asked, lips curving into a small yet charming smile.

Sohan looked at Y/N then at Luke. “I need to talk to Praetor Jae about something important. Praetor, would you mind showing Luke around?” Sohan didn’t wait for an answer before clumsily hurrying off, dropping swords every two seconds.

“You forget these swords!” Luke called after him but Sohan wasn’t listening.

“Dump them here with the rest.” Y/N instructed with a shrug. Luke dropped the swords, watching as they hit the floor with a loud clang. “Let’s get started with the tour.” She formally clasped her hands behind her back, standing up straighter than Luke had ever seen somebody stand.

“This is the Praetorian Gate, the entrance to the main barracks. On your right is the bathrooms. This street is called the Via Principalis, it’s the central road lined with barracks, the mess hall, and other necessaries needed for our wellbeing.”

Luke was a little stunned with how Y/N was speaking. She was talking like her words were scripted and had been practiced a million times in the mirror. Luke usually free-styled his tours.

“Centurion Sohan will show you your room once he finishes with his errand. For now, all you need to know is that you’ll be staying in one of these buildings. Behind them is the compost bin. Please do not jump in there because we have had to go dumpster diving to retrieve Half-Blood campers.”

Luke let out a quiet sigh. “It was Travis, wasn’t it?”

“You know him?” Y/N questioned, looking over her shoulder in mild interest.

“Unfortunately. He’s my brother.”

Y/N silently nodded, holding back a comment. “Beside the compost bin, where your raccoon of a brother jumped into for a game of hide and seek, are the stables.” Y/N led Luke down a smaller path to show him the stables. He glanced at the bin, arching an eyebrow at a badly drawn version of Travis on a sign with a large X on it.

“We had to ensure nobody else jumped in again.” Y/N explained, “So we put up a sign. It’s not very well-drawn. All the Apollo kids were away so we had no one artistic around. Over there is the training centre. Feel free to use it whenever. We have plenty of new swords as you already know.”

“What about those buildings?” Luke asked in curiosity as they walked back towards the main entrance.

“That’s the Praetorium and Principa, used to hold meetings and act as headquarters. Those aren’t important to you.”

Camp Jupiter was bigger than Luke expected. There were two main areas for civilisation and even a university.

“This is the forum. This area of camp is basically a replicant of Rome itself.” Y/N piped up, “There’s the senate house, also used for meetings, New Rome University, the Coliseum where we sometimes train or host mock battles, Circus Maximum, again used for training, sometimes chariot racing, ceremonies, and so on. There’s a lake over there if you ever wanna spend your free time swimming, but I will warn you that if you ever take your shirt off, it will attract attention.” Y/N teasingly smiled, confusing Luke. She was strictly sticking to her job as a praetor a moment ago, reciting a speech about the camp.

“Uh… why will it attract attention?” Luke sheepishly asked, feeling a little embarrassed for not catching on.

“You’re a new boy, Luke Girls here love fresh meat, especially when they have as much muscle as you.”

Luke’s cheeks flushed light pink. “Right.” He uttered, suddenly aware of how a group of girls was waiting for Y/N to leave so they could pounce on him. “Let’s uh, go back to the bin. I wanna see that sign of my brother again.”

Y/N slightly chuckled. “They aren’t gonna hurt you, Castellan.” She said, referring to the girls behind her, “Unless you want them to.”

“I would prefer to keep all my limbs attached to my body, thank you very much.”

Y/N cracked another amused smile. “Suit yourself. I like my boys missing an arm.” She joked.

“Guess I’ll cut mine off then after all.” Luke wittily retorted.

“We have a game of capture the flag happening tonight if you want to join.” Y/N offered, “You can sacrifice your arm for me then.”

Luke grinned, happy he was actually getting along with someone from Camp Jupiter given their rivalry with Half-Blood. “I’ve heard your games of Capture the flag are a little more harsher… to what extent is that actually true?”

Y/N quietly laughed. “It’s Roman style, someone will probably lose an eye to be honest.” She said it in such a joking tone but there was a look in her eyes that alerted Luke she wasn’t joking.

—

Luke would definitely come to regret even thinking about joining this game of capture the flag. The teams weren’t organised by Cabins, instead each leader strategically chose their members months before the actual game to ensure a high chance of victory.

Luke ended up standing across from Y/N, dressed in golden armour and holding a sword that seemed to be a little too heavy. Sohan was with Luke, checking his arrows.

“They still allow you to use how and arrows?” Luke questioned, remembering how said weapon was banned from Half-Blood’s game of capture the flag because of an incident.

“What’s fun without a little arrow wound?” Sohan joked. Luke slowly turned his head, eyes wider than usual.

“Not being stabbed by an arrow seems more fun.” He muttered to himself.

He glanced at Y/N, who was carelessly swinging her long spear around. She met his gaze and paused for a second before lightly dragging her thumb over her throat with a patronising grin.

Luke gulped. “She’s gonna kill me.” He whispered.

“Oh, good! That means she likes you.” Sohan nudged Luke with a smile, “The harder she tries to kill you, the more she likes you.”

“That seems a little contradictory.” Luke replied, almost shaking.

“When the bell rings, and trust me you’ll hear it, just follow me. We’re paired together to hide and defend the flag. All you have to do is hide and jump out to stop the opponents. They’ll think it’s only me and then, bam! You come in.” Sohan explained the plan to Luke, who was listening intently so he wasn’t the one to lose an eye.

Sohan tightly gripped the flag in his grasp. “We have ten minutes to plant the flag somewhere. A second bell will ring and that means the game has started.”

Luke nodded, his heart pounding in his chest. A loud bell suddenly rang out through the clearing and Sohan immediately sprung into action. He sprinted off and Luke scrambled to follow him.

“This way!” Sohan exclaimed as he sharply turned to the left. Luke leaped over a log, landing heavily on the hard dirt. The forest should have felt familiar since Half-Blood also played surrounded by trees but this felt different. Luke had no idea where they were going until Sohan came to an abrupt stop.

“Here should be good.” He panted.

Luke looked around. They were surrounded by heavy vegetation and he was barely able to see past the thick tree leaves. Sohan lodged the flag between two stones and nodded in approval.

“The bell will be ringing soon. Hide over there.” Sohan ordered, pointing at a bush beside the flag. Luke sighed as he ducked behind the bush, the twigs below him scraping at his knees. “I hate this hiding place.” He muttered, “I feel like a Guinea pig.”

“That sounds like a you problem.” Sohan replied. “The bell should be ringing any second now. Remember to stay quiet.”

Luke silently rolled his eyes as he ducked lower to the floor in order to get comfortable and peek past the bush branches. In the distance, he could hear the sound of the second bell ringing followed by loud shouts varying in volume. Some kids at Half-Blood, mainly the Ares kids, loved battle cries but not to that extent.

Luke waited ten minutes and when nothing happened, he resorted to lying on his back. Twenty minutes passed and there was still no sign of any other demigods. Luke had resorted to seeing how many leaves he could count before he heard a quiet rustle. He paused, waiting.

Everything was still before Luke heard weapons clash loudly together. He peered above the bush, instantly recognising Y/N past her bronze helmet. There was another kid reaching for the flag while Sohan was struggling with Y/N.

Luke quickly reached for his sword, flinging it at the Roman demigod before he could grasp the flag. The handle hit him in the face, temporarily stunning him. Luke was swift to jump out and grab his sword, holding it in front of him.

“Sorry ‘bout that, man.” Luke uttered. He swung his blade at the demigod boy, who he later realized was named Nikolai because of the inscription in his helmet.

Nikolai counterattacked Luke, effortlessly pushing the Greek brunette back. Luke was reluctant to injure a kid he barely knew but Sohan continuously shouting “hit him” was getting annoying.

Luke grabbed Nikolai by the shoulders, shoving him away from the flag. Sohan was battling against Y/N, who had a spear similar to Clarisse’s. Compared to her spear, Sohan’s bow and arrows and backup dagger wouldn’t be of much use.

Nikolai swung his sword at Luke but every time, Luke managed to block the hits. Luke pushed Nikolai’s sword away, but he underestimated his strength and the sword went flying.

Both Nikolai and Luke turned their heads to stare at the weapon lying on the floor.

“Hit him!” Sohan exclaimed through gritted teeth as he held Y/N back by her arm.

Luke, on instinct, punched Nikolai’s shoulder and scrambled for his sword. He leaned over to grasp it but he was unexpectedly kicked from behind.

Y/N, who Sohan should have been holding back, had knocked the son of Mercury to the ground and made an instant beeline for Luke.

“Don’t chop my head off!” Luke yelled as he rolled to the left to avoid Y/N’s sword as she forcefully swung it down. Luke kicked her ankles, causing her to sway.

Nikolai made another reach for the flag but Sohan managed to shoot an arrow his way, luckily not hitting the boy but it served as a warning.

“You said this was an easy job!” Luke yelled at Sohan as Y/N made another attempt to hit Luke. He tried to strike her ankles again but the same trick wouldn’t fool the praetor twice. She effortlessly pulled him up and slammed his back against a tree, holding a smaller knife to his throat.

“I am literally so scared right now.” Luke wheezed as he wiggled around in Y/N’s surprisingly strong grip. Sohan shot another arrow, this time at Y/N. It barely missed her head. While she was shocked for a second, Luke grabbed her by both shoulders and pushed her back.

“We got a runner!” Another voice suddenly shouted. A member of Y/N’s team, sprinted into the area, followed by two boys from Luke and Sohan’s group.

Sohan scrambled to stop the runner aiming for the flag but Nikolai knocked him back to the ground. Luke made the executive decision to pursue the runner. There wasn’t much Luke could do with his sword so he tossed it aside and did the only other thing he could think of; he tackled the other demigod.

Y/N let out a laugh as the two boys toppled down a hill, each trying to let the other take the brute of the floor. Luke groaned as he spat out a mouthful of daisies. His helmet had fallen off somewhere and he had no energy to actively search for it.

The bell rung once more and the demigod beside Luke sighed as he removed his helmet, running a hand through his messy blond hair.

“You’re the Greek kid, right?” He questioned. “I’m Kato.”

“Yeah. Luke, nice to meet you.”

“Do you also feel like you’ve got internal bleeding?” Kato grumbled as the two boys made no effort to sit up, instead choosing to just lie on the floor among the flowers.

“Oh, definitely.” Luke replied, “Think I might be sick later.”

—

“You both have bruised ribs. Honestly, it could have been worse. Drinking this will help.” An Apollo kid handed Kato and Luke a foul smelling drink.

“It’s best to get it over and down with.” Kato whispered, “Cheers.”

“Not sure if I actually want to consume this.” Luke wrinkled up his nose but tilted his head back away.

The pair gulped down the liquid as fast as they could, both gagging once they had finished.

“Wow, you guys are almost like twins. If Kato had brown hair, you guys might actually sell it.”

Kato and Luke exchanged a look before they both grinned.

“I didn’t know there was temporary hair dye.” Kato said as he stared down at the box. Y/N sighed, placing her hands on her hips.

“Do you want it or not? Coloured hair spray might be easier for you.”

“Yeah, give me that.” Kato threw the box of temporary dye aside. Luke easily caught it, handing it to Y/N.

“Thanks.” She smiled before looking through a trunk of hair supplies. “Good game out there, Castellan. Are you always that quick thinking on your feet?”

Luke shrugged as he stood beside Y/N, leaning on the bunk bed behind him. “I guess? Most of the time we have to think quickly at Half-Blood. We don’t exactly have strategies for every little thing.”

Y/N and Kato stared at Luke in mild surprise. Y/N let out a quiet huff, “I guess you Greeks are disorganised like Lupa said.”

“She said what?” Luke stood up straight. “We aren’t that disorganised. We still have tactics.”

“Yeah, and they kind of, forgive my language here, suck.”

“At least my whole existence isn’t based on a brother who killed his sibling because of anger issues.” Luke muttered loud enough for Y/N to hear.

“You are so dead, Castellan.” Y/N retorted, leaning forward.

“I don’t really want to use the same threat as you because that’s boring. But I will kick your ankle again.” Luke replied.

Kato cleared his throat. “Don’t mean to interrupt whatever… lover argument you have going on but how does this spray work?”

“The cap’s still on. You gotta take it off first.” Y/N exasperatedly sighed.

“Oh, yeah, got it. Go back to your lovers quarrel.”

Y/N picked up an empty box of hair dye, tossing it at Kato. “There is no lovers quarrel!” She exclaimed.

“Really? Bc I felt something.” Luke teasingly piped up from behind her.

“I hope you choke.” Y/N mumbled, sending Luke a warning glare. “Maybe I should’ve cut off your arm. Would’ve taught you a reason.”

“I’ll just take my shirt off because like you said, no one can resist me.” Luke grinned as they bantered back and forth.

“Don’t rely on your looks to escape me, Castellan. Next time we play capture the flag, I’m kicking you down another hill no matter whose team you’re in.” There was a knock on the door and a rough-looking teenager peeked his head inside.

His body was covered in cuts, grazes, and purple bruises. He had a slit in his left eyebrow and an earring dangling from his right ear. When he turned to Y/N and said something in Latin, Luke noticed a shiny piercing on his tongue.

“Castellan, right?” The boy asked, pointing at Luke. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jae, the other praetor.” Jae stepped forward and reached for Luke’s hand, firmly shaking it.

“Nice to meet you.” Luke greeted him.

“I see you’ve already found yourself acquainted with the devil reincarnated.” Jae slyly grinned at Y/N, who could do nothing but huff and cross her arms over her chest in annoyance. “I’ve got to borrow Praetor Y/N for a second, hope you boys don’t mind.”

Y/N sighed as she followed Jae out the door. “This couldn’t have waited?” She asked.

“I was reluctant to interfere. You and the Castellan boy seemed quite close.” Jae replied with a shrug.

“I will literally feed you to the monsters if you don’t shut your mouth.”

“She likes you.” Kato uttered once Y/N was out of ear range.

“How can you tell?” Luke arched an eyebrow as he sat down on a nearby chair.

“She never argues with anyone. Not like that at least. When she argues, you have to listen because there’s no choice. That was more like… bickering used as an excuse to talk to you.” Kato said as he finally put down the can of hair spray. “Yo, we kind of do look alike. That’s freaky.”

Luke ignored Kato’s last point. “How do you know she doesn’t bicker?”

“Praetor Y/N is a straight to the point type of girl. You’ll know when she doesn’t like something. If she was really arguing with you, she would’ve had you shut up within your first two words.” Kato laughed, “She made me shut up once by shoving the words down my throat… literally. She wrote my words on a piece of paper and made me eat it.”

Kato paused, shivering as he remembered the chilling moment. “Anyway, Centurion Sohan, me, and a couple of other guys are going to the lake for a swim. You wanna join?”

“Yeah, sure, why not. I’ll act as eye candy like Y/N described me.” Luke sarcastically said, making Kato chuckle.

“Trust me, the girls will love you.” Kato only reassured Y/N’s point.

There were already a few smaller groups at the lake when Luke and the others arrived. As Luke combed a hand through his hair, he noticed a few girls looking his way and giggling. Kato nudged him.

“See? Told you they’d love you.”

Luke simply nodded. He lifted his shirt to pull it off but unexpectedly saw Y/N not too far away, locked in what seemed to be a serious conversation with Jae. Her eyebrows were tensely furrowed before her gaze suddenly switched to Luke.

He almost jumped at how fast her eyes moved. He quickly pulled his shirt off, giving Y/N a small wave. She slightly raised her eyebrows but never looked away. Slowly, she waved back.

Jae finished speaking and Y/N nodded, pointing to her right and uttering a few more words before they split ways.

“Wow, you two really do look like twins.” Y/N said as she looked at Luke and Kato. “You sure you don’t share a mother?”

“You out here for a swim too?” Luke questioned, squinting under the bright sun.

“No. I came here to check out the guys and pick my next murder victim.”

“How charming. And I thought what we had was special when you threatened to roll me down a hill again.”

“I’m saving you for last, Castellan. When the police find my victims, I’ll ask you to hide me then I’ll stab you in the back.”

“You know what I’m craving right now?” Luke switched the topic, “A pina colada.”

Y/N stared at Luke for a minute before furrowing her eyebrows. “Is that… some sort of drink?”

She heard Luke dramatically gasp. “You’ve never tried one?! Lucky for you, I’m a master at making cocktails. Just sit here, look pretty, and choose your next target. I’ll be right back.”

That was how Y/N found herself hanging around Luke almost every day, trying different cocktail mixtures he made while sitting under a large umbrella to avoid the heat.

“Why’d you put so much vodka in this one?” Y/N questioned, frowning, “It’s all I can taste.”

“My hand slipped.” Luke shrugged. He was lying on a towel beside Y/N, taking advantage of the sun to gain that perfect summer tan, as he liked to call it. “How come you never join your friends in the water?” He questioned, glancing over at Jae and a few other campers who were beckoning Y/N over.

“I don’t like water.” She covered her eyes with her shaded sunglasses, ignoring her friends. “It messes up my hair.”

“I’ll go swimming then. I think my back is turning red now.” Luke stood up, stretching. Y/N gulped down the rest of her drink, carelessly throwing the cup to the side as she jumped to her feet.

“I’ll come if you’re going.” She announced.

“Why the sudden change in attitude?” Luke teased, nudging her.

“I will force your head under water and let you drown.” Y/N deadpanned, causing Luke to take a small step back. Luke reached for his water bottle and took a large sip while Y/N peeled her shirt off. Luke’s eyes flickered to her for a second before his cheeks turned red and he spat out a mouthful of water.

Y/N looked at him weirdly, a judging glint in her eyes. “You good?” She asked.

“Yeah… fine.” Luke choked out.

Y/N didn’t believe him. She looked down at her bikini with bows and ruffles before raising an eyebrow. “Are you staring at my boobs?” She accused him.

“No! Are you staring at my abs?!” Luke tried to change the conversation but his attempt backfired.

“Yes. You’ve got nice abs.” Y/N shamelessly admitted like a true Roman, never scared to state the obvious.

“Well, in that case, you’ve got nice boobs.” Luke wanted to punch himself as soon as he said that.

“It doesn’t sound right when you say that to a girl.” Y/N scrunched up her face which only made Luke’s desire to be swallowed by the ground stronger.

“I realised that.”

“Praetor! Luke! Are you gonna keep chatting or finally get in the water?!” Sohan yelled from his position on a rock in the water.

“My makeup’s gonna get all ruined.” Y/N huffed but still dipped a leg into the lake. “It’s cold.”

“Lake’s are usually cold.” Luke retorted, not hesitating to jump into the deep end of the lake. Water splashed everywhere and Y/N shielded her face from the droplets.

“Watch it!” She yelled out a warning at Luke as he resurfaced, grinning.

“Oops.” He sarcastically apologised.

Y/N sat down at the shore’s edge, soaking her legs in the lake. “I’m good here.” She said, kicking her legs.

“You sure? The water isn’t that cold once you get used to it.” Luke swam closer to her and heaved himself up onto the warm rock.

Y/N kicked the water again, nodding. “Yeah… I’ll ruin my hair and makeup if I get in.” She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear but it slipped out again, much to her annoyance.

She frowned, reaching for it again, but Luke beat her to it. “You’re pretty without makeup.” He said as he securely tucked the strand away.

Y/N glanced at the boy beside her, suddenly feeling very small. Luke made her feel vulnerable, not necessarily in a bad way. His deep brown eyes made her want to pour out every secret.

Like how she secretly hated an Apollo boy because he kept beating her to the last piece of cake.

Or how she cheated on every English paper in school to raise her GPA because she simply couldn’t read properly.

Or perhaps about how she was afraid of love, despite being the daughter of Venus herself. That fear always made Y/N feel a little stupid.

Or… how she couldn’t swim and refused to swim because she almost drowned once while her so-called friends laughed at her.

“Castell- Luke…” She quickly corrected herself, realising how accustomed she had become to Luke’s presence. “I can’t swim.” She blurted out. “My hair and makeup don’t matter… I just can’t swim. And I don’t want to swim.”

Luke carelessly shrugged and for a second, Y/N was scared he’d dismiss her fear.

“I’ll stay here with you then.” He said instead. “I’ll keep you company.”

“You can swim if you want to.” Y/N replied, fidgeting with her hands. Her heart leaped in her chest and her stomach felt queasy. Was this a crush?

“Nah. I like it here better.” Luke shifted closer to Y/N, slowly slinging an arm around her shoulder. He was expecting her to immediately shove him away but she remained still. Her back was rigidly straight until she hesitatingly relaxed.

“Thank you.” She said as the sun began to set, hues of orange, yellow, and blue painting the sky and reflecting into the lake. Y/N was surrounded by laughing demigods and legacies but she could only focus on Luke; how his hair looked perfect despite being damp, how his skin glistened in the sun, and how his arm was wrapped tightly around her as if he was protecting her from something.

For once, she felt safe. There was no quest she was required to complete, no glory to seek for the Legion, and no heavy exceptions weighing her down.

It was just her and Luke sitting beside each other in comfortable silence.

—

“Are you sure you have to go?” Sohan asked as he tightly clung to Luke, fully prepared to force the son of Hermes to stay.

“My little sister’s waiting for me.” Luke said as he hugged Sohan back, firmly patting his shoulder. Annabeth. Luke had told Y/N about his sister; they weren’t related by blood but she was his found family.

“Make sure to visit and right.” Jae uttered as he struggled to pull Sohan away from Luke. Y/N stood silently next to Jae, holding Luke’s bag.

“Have a safe trip.” She told him, which wasn’t the goodbye Luke had been expecting. He envisioned a small smile, maybe a hug if Y/N was in a good mood.

“Thanks. Good luck with your praetorian duties.” Luke replied, nodding his head.

“You ready to go?” Kato piped up, throwing the car keys in the air and effortlessly catching them.

“Yeah… I guess.” Luke muttered, stealing another glance at Y/N.

‘KISS HER!’ His mind screamed at him. This would be his last opportunity to address the feelings he had caught for Venus’ favourite daughter.

Jae and Sohan looked at each other then at Y/N, who seemed to be restraining all emotions. They almost seemed like they were begging her to make a move on Luke before it was too late.

“Bye, Y/N.” Luke stuck out his hand and Y/N didn’t hesitate to grab it.

“Good bye, Castellan. Camp Jupiter will miss you.”

Luke knew Y/N was too prideful to say ‘I’ll miss you’. This was her alternative.

Luke and Y/N stared at each other with their hands still gripping the other before they finally halted the awkward exchange.

Luke followed Kato towards the car, somewhat hoping Y/N would chase after him. She didn’t.

Y/N watched with her head held high to conceal her frown as Luke walked away, waiting for the moment he’d turn around and run back. He never did. He passed the stone arch that acted as entrance to Camp Jupiter, most likely to never return and if he ever did, it’d be in a few long years.

—

A year had passed since Luke’s departure from the Roman Demigod camp. He was pleased to be back at Half-Blood, but there was someone who was missing. As expected, some Aphrodite girls showed strong interest in Luke, but he never paid them attention.

They were beautiful, but Luke missed the girl who would threaten to throw him to the wolves if he even looked at her. He found her guarded personality charming.

“Luke, Chiron needs you to show one of the exchange campers from Jupiter around.” Chris, Luke’s brother, said. “She’s the last one.”

“Oh, yeah, sure.” Luke spent months hoping Y/N would show up randomly one day but after three, he gave up. He had heard from Sohan’s regularly written letters, which often featured Jae and Kato too, that Y/N was busier than ever as a praetor. She had doubled her work load, working until she quite literally passed out. Sohan expressed his concerns but didn’t quite know what was wrong.

“She’s waiting in the strawberry field.” Chris told Luke, pointing him in the right direction.

Luke took his sweet time in walking towards the field, his hands shoved into his pockets. There was a figure standing amongst the strawberries, admiring the various flowers and berries.

“Late as usual, Castellan. How Greek of you.”

Luke’s eyes lit up at the sight of the girl in front of him. He cracked a large grin. “What can I say, Y/N? I’m a true Greek demigod.”

FIN.

A/N: while writing this, I was randomly reminded of an old classic book I read where the main characters are clearly in love but know they’ll never see each other again after they split ways. And now I’m sad.

PJO TAG LIST (will update later, I’m tired 😴): @lostinhisworld @julielightwood @jennapancake @evrybodydies1 @kkrenae @s0ulsniper @be-bap @kamiliora @2hiigh2cry @gisellesprettylies @ur-lacol-dsylexic @lilacspider @lukecastellandefender

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celestie0 · 5 months ago

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hi my friends! hope you're all doing well. just wanted to come on here and share a little updates w you guys (if you're still here lol)

i guess it's been like a month n a half since i formally went on hiatus, and it's been nice! i got kinda sick for a little bit lmfaooo which was tough to manage w school, but i'm better now

although i took time away from my blog, i still delved in writing here n there. i haven't written anything for kickoff since tbh i'm in such a slump w it. but i still have big plans for stuff that happens after ch13, so hopefully i can just push through this next chapter and get to a better place. thanks so much to anyone that is still interested in the story, it means a lot to me. i know i'm so slow w updates and the story has been going on for almost a year now, but the continued support is so sweet! even though i didn't work on writing it these past one n a half months, i still really love it and plan to finish it.

i'm not sure if many people remember that i had this sort of "apocalypse" gojo x reader au about an asteroid being set to hit the earth in three days, and reader n gojo are ex lovers n the impending end of the world makes them break no-contact...yeah i finished writing the first chapter for it and i really love it so far! it's like set in new york which is really fun haha i love stories where new york is kind of its own "character" if that makes sense...it will definitely be a limited series w only 4 chapters or so, but i kinda wanna finish all 4 chapters before i start posting it bc i don't want it to be a drawn out series in terms of posting since i think it'd be best enjoyed in frequent succession if that makes sense

as for ihm, i think i wrote the most for ihm during my hiatus. i finished three chapters for it, but they are shorter chapters (around 3-4k words). i kinda realized one of my biggest reasons for burnout w my fics were the reaaaaallly long chapters...like didn't i have a 22k chapter for kickoff or sumn lol. idk i can't remember. but anyways, yeah the mindset behind the longer chapters was bc i liked each chapter to kinda have its own conflict, build up, tension then resolution in a sense. but it was exhausting to write that way tbh lol. so i think moving forward, for ihm, i will have shorter chapters. i just don't wanna think to much about things anymore, and write from my heart, bc i have a lot of things planned for ihm, and among the criticism i've received for my writing choices vs my own vision for the story, i've realized during my hiatus that the only way i can finish ihm, or any of my storeis for that matter, is if i just.........stop giving a fuck about it. lol idk if that sounds strange to say, but like, i don't want to over-edit anything. i don't want to think too much about redundancy. i don't want to flower things up or cut stuff out. i'm at the point where imma just write a first draft, check for grammarly errors, and then post it. i guess the reason i'm sharing this is because idk if this means that people may enjoy my writing less since i will admittedly be spending much less time on it than i did before, but tbh i realized i find the most joy while i'm writing, and not while i'm editing. so i want to spend as little time on the latter as possible, and if that changes the quality of my work, then so be it.

anyways, hmm as for hiatus. i guess i'm off hiatus now? i really enjoyed being off of tumblr tbh this app has a lot of questionable content at times (esp in jjk community) and it also did wonders for my studying bc i wasn't spending time doomscrolling or shit posting anymore lmfaooo. but as for writing in particular, i think i will start to post ihm again exclusively. i can't say anything about kickoff or my other projects, but i feel comfortable to start posting ihm again.

sorry, i know that i have kept my replies and ask box off for a long time. but i will open them again once i start posting chapters because i really miss interacting with you guys.

anywho, these are my updates lol i'm like not sure how many of my readers are still here or which ones have moved on but that's ok, i'm grateful to anyone n everyone. hope to see you all soon again!

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dosshie · 10 months ago

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my mom, that studied african religion for more than a decade and is part of umbanda, live reaction to ororon and iansan:

"I don't care if you make them white with blue eyes, at least study the gods you're basing them from!!!!"

im too afraid of twitter so imma post this here, but for short: the skin color is not the only problem! lol

i asked my mom who is very knowledgeable of the religion for her opinions and this is what we talked!! please don't take this post as an flawless analysis, you should also hear the opinions of people from umbanda, candomblé, and specially from nigeria. i'm mainly doing this because this religion barely gets any representation at all, so this will be the first time many people will be introduced to this culture and while i'm happy that it's included in a game that i play, it's important to recognize its shortcomings, anyway enough rambling!

for iansan, her character is based on iansã, the orixá (deity/god) of the winds and storms, she is seen as a warrior and is associated with the color red

she said that they easily could've given her buffalo horns on her mask, since iansã's animal is the buffalo (tho i know some people may think this is insensitive since yknow, giving one of the few dark-skinned charactes an animal skull doesn't look very good), the other thing she said is that they could've given her some braids in her hair, because in history thats what iansã and her army used to wear when they were going in combat (which was like, VERY on point??? i didnt tell her natlan was the nation of war beforehand)

other than that she didn't gave much imput, probably because her design does look like someone who fights

now, as for ororon... he is based on olorum, the orixá closest to a god/creator, and is commonly associated with...... the color white..... and one of his visual features is his staff

she said that they could've easily given him light hair/eyes, for her ororon doesn't seem to resemble olorum in the slightest, i also asked jokingly what she thought about him being a wolfboy and she said that it was fine lol

she asked me what power (vision/weapon) they gave to him and i said that i didn't know, but from the leaks they said that he's a bow character, and she immediately said that they made logunedé, in her words: "HE'S A HUNTER AND HE LOOKS A BIT SISSY, IT'S LOGUMEDÉ!"

logumedé is the son of the orixás oxóssi and oxum, he is a hunter like his father and takes care of his looks like his mother* (that's why she called him sissy LOL), his weapon is the bow, his colors are blue and yellow and he's associated with the animal peacock, which was what made my mom make that connection, ororon's scarf reminded her a lot of a peacock feather

*the word used here is vaidoso but... that doesn't exist in english lmao?? the closest we have is "vain" but vain is much more akin to superficial, which is not a synonymous of vaidoso, so yeah, weird translation quirk here, vaidoso means that you care of yourself/your looks because they are important to you

erhmmm anyway 1 like and i'll redesign them based on the actual orixás (/hj i still have artfight attacks to finish lmao)

#genshin impact #natlan #iansan #ororon #genshin analysis #also if anyone wants to repost this feel free. i just ask you to censor my user if possible lol this isnt any sort of in-depth analysis #i wanna leave the good analysis to the people who are more knowledgeable than me

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freakshowtwopointoh · 1 year ago

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Hi!! Can I request jealous Jordan li where reader is spending a lot of time with someone else, maybe for a school project or something and Jordan notices and is like, nope, not happening, this one's mine bc they're so in love with reader and want all of the attention

Whew, that was a lot, haha,

Thank you!!!!

*not sure if u want established partners or situationship w feelings or something else, but i think imma go with situationship bc thats always the vibe for jordan lol if u want more established relationship lmk*

Debate club was a sensible extracurricular, and you had been doing it since your school stopped having model UN in 9th grade. It wasn't your favorite thing in the world, but you liked to argue, so it worked out. This week, you were arguing the "for" case with your teammate for the semester, Blake Mathers. He's a grating sophomore with floppy hair, and telekinesis powers you've only seen him use to enable his own laziness. The head of the club was nice enough, but he was insistent on "teamwork" when you'd much rather write alone. It was exhausting, trying to filter your thoughts and opinions, and allowing others to shine was not your style.

You try to pay attention to what Blake was saying about the topic, but all you were thinking about was Jordan Li. Ever since you made out at one of Dusty's infamous parties, they had invaded your senses and your thoughts. They'd catch you staring during class, or you'd wear a tiny skirt to a party, and you'd end up in a closet, or a car, or a bedroom, all limbs and heavy breathing.

"Um, hello? Did you hear me?" You shake your head.

"Sorry. Say that again?"

"The argument we wrote yesterday. It's gone - my computer got fucked." Ah, crap. This is the second time Blake's stupidity has made you re-do work. You'd done some research at the start of the week, and he'd forgotten to mention the topic had been changed. You sigh.

"Well, fuck. Alright, let's go back to the library then." You turn around and start walking, trying not to show your disappointment. You'd been hoping to "run into" Jordan at the JitterBean - hence the tight-ass skinny jeans.

Waste of an outfit, you think bitterly, pushing open the glass doors and setting up at the table that you and Blake had been using to do your assignments. Thankfully you'd saved your notes from yesterday, so you began reconstructing your argument while Blake screwed off.

You weren't paying much attention to what he was doing until you saw him fucking with Justine. Now there's some bullying you can get behind. You giggle, and watch as he makes another paper airplane fly around her head. She glares over at him and storms out, which makes you laugh out loud. The librarian glares, and you exchange a guilty look with Blake before getting back into writing.

The afternoon goes by easily after that. You were vaguely aware of other students milling about or studying nearby, but you were in the zone. Finally, at almost 8, the argument was done, and you saved it in multiple places just in case.

You wave goodbye to Blake, happy that the session went reasonably ok and the work was done. Saturday's debate was going to be a blast.

"Have fun on your little date with Mathers?" Jordan was leaning against the outside wall of the library, expression unreadable.

"Is the infamous Jordan Li jealous?" Their eyes harden slightly.

"Not jealous, just lookin out for you. He's a moron." They begin walking beside you, not acknowledging how unhinged they were behaving. Just looking out for you? If they weren't so damn hot, you might slap them. But the fact that they were asking meant.... something, right? You ignored how that made your heart swoop and just kept walking.

"We have debate club together, and he keeps fucking shit up, that's all." You say, in spite of yourself. If you were smarter, you'd let them wonder what you were doing with him. But you couldn't keep from looking at them, and feeling disappointed you can't make out any relief in their eyes. But then, their arm is snaked around your waist and their lips are at your ear.

"You wear those skin fucking tight jeans to just study with him?" You grit your teeth, forcing your mouth to not say what you wanted so desperately to say: 'No, I wore them for you, and you're clearly the idiot if you can't tell that I am so wrapped around your finger that I will dress up just in case I see you.' and just roll your eyes instead. They let their hand slide from your waist to your back pocket, daring you to stop them. And of course you don't. With every inch their hand travels, your heart skips another beat. When they squeeze your ass ever so slightly, a whimper sneaks out before you can stop it.

And with that, you're being pressed against a tree and their lips are on your neck.

"Fuck, J." You curse as their teeth sink into your skin.

"You're mine, baby. Only mine." They murmur in your ear.

"Always have been." You say back, almost moaning as they continue their assault on your neck. They pull away at this.

"Yeah? That why you're spending all your time with Mathers and co instead of me, in such," They pause to run their hands on your hips, pulling you tight against them. "delicious clothes."

"I thought you weren't jealous." You murmur, sliding your hand up their back. "But I wore these, and what's underneath, for you and you alone. He's just a moron who's forced me to re-do my work twice this week alone."

"Oh, you poor baby. Let me take you up and make everyone hear who really owns you." You barely hold back a moan as they drag you up to your dorm to fulfill their promise.

#jordan li #gen v #gen v prime #jordan li x reader #gen v smut #gen v fic #jordan li imagine #request #reqs open

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romanticisingashislife · 2 months ago

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the burnout was soooo real

gang we failed this attempt :(

but its okay we got second attempt for a reason, after this attempt my ass could not do shitt for like next 10 days,

till now i have written down all the mistakes (which were alot lolll) and how to simplify them

some things i did to pull myself out of the burnout were-

set so small goals like mine were like study for an hr and thats it

give urself time to be mid at studies

pick out a playlist and then start just start

take a nap if ur bored jus dont go through social media

consuming too much media + burnout is DEATH. like it starts an endless loop of feeling guilt

yeah and thats all i mean i really dont have a choice but to continue lol i came this far , and i aint giving up now!!!!!!!!!!

plus it will be over in 3-4 months anyways, the time is gonna pass anyways why shouldnt i make the most of it? i jus dont wanna regret shit

so yeah now my study hrs have gone up to 5-6 hrs again :p ik its not a lot but it is what it is

imma try to update regularly on what i have done till now :p

take care cutiessssssss

mwahhhhhhhhh

(uff this limits has me testing my limitssssss </333)

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lazuli-starlight · 2 months ago

Note

What are your favourite characters in TSAMS?

Sorry this took so long to answer Anon, my brain has been made of Soup lately. Warning, this is LONG. I either say nothing or I write essays there is no in-between with me.

Anyways

From the very first video TSAMS I have watched, there has always been One Character that my brain latched on to like a deranged wrinkly pink leech and has refused to let go of.

The absolute edgelord theatre kid supreme turned soggy wet dorito, Eclipse.

I’m being serious when I say he is one of my favourite antagonist characters of All Time in any I have ever consumed. Hang on, imma see if I can find the tumblr post I made about half a year ago where I gushed about how much I love his character and copy paste it under the readmore, lol:

--------------

Been thinking recently about how Eclipse is not only my favorite TSBS character, but perhaps one of my favorite villian characters of all time. He's just so much fun to put under a microscope.

He's done terrible things. He's an absolute Edgelord Theatre Kid Supreme. He's a pathetic sad, wet cat of a man. He will kill without remorse. He's a sarcastic ball of prickles. He's so very smart and also so very dense. He's so overly serious it warps around to being funny. He's a grumpy bear. He's an absolute jerk and cares despite how much he pretends he doesn't. He's a liar, yet somehow authentic in a way other people often are not. He hates people. He is lonely. He is utterly terrified of vulnerability. He yearns to be loved, and perhaps also yearns to love others in turn. His ego is huge. He has been humbled hugely.

I have never been so strongly affected by a character death than Eclipse calling himself pathetic in his final moments. It hurt, despite everything he was, everything he had done. I thought it was a fantastic end for him, a wonderful conclusion to his story. I was still overjoyed when he was brought back. And now he is learning and growing. Everything I had been sad he had been unable to let himself do before his end.

Because, while sometimes bad things happen to people who don't deserve it, it is also true that sometimes somebody who does not deserve a second, third, fourth chance gets it. And sometimes, somebody who you never would think would use it, finally starts the journey to turn their life around. And sticks with it. And, that's something that makes me happy.

-----------------

In present day, he is a protagonist rather than an antagonist, but I still love his character. EAPS has fed me so much in regards to Eclipse’s character and allowed me to do more of one of my favourite things: Put Eclipses Psyche into a Petri Dish and Study it Under a Microscope. That And I admit to having weakness for the following tropes present in EAPS Eclipse: -Bad Guy is Not So Much Reformed But Rather Domesticated Like A Feral Cat -Bad/Mean Guy is Soft For A Specific Person/People -Villain/ Ex-Villain Adopts A Daughter -Ex-Bad Guy Uses Bad Guy Skills To Serve Good Guy Cause -Platonic Tsundere Cares Deeply For Friends and Family -Bad Guy/ Ex-Bad Guy With Friendless Background is Overprotective and Possessive of Their Loved Ones -Long-Term Redemption Stories Full of Character Growth and Character Exploration -Grouchy Person Suffering Played For Laughs -Snark

So yeah, even though EAPS Eclipse isn’t an antagonist any more he is *still* my favourite TSBS Character and I’m so grateful that EAPS is a Thing XD

(Also in the interest of honesty another reason I like Eclipse: I may be aroace but even I find the voice Davis gave him to be attractive. Sue Me.)

#ask answer #tsams #eaps #eclipse and puppet show #the sun and moon show #tsams eclipse #eaps eclipse #warning long post lol #lazuli talks at yall #in which I gush about one of my long-term blorbos

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rainy-days-and-nights · 24 days ago

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GET TO KNOW UR MUTUALS!!!! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

tagged by @just-prime

lets seeeee

What’s the origin of your blog title?: I like rainy days and rainy…nights….JLADNJNCADJACD not much thought into it, but my last username SeaKeeper was “supposedly” my name meaning which I liked tons fr fr but that name is no longer…JADNKJACDBKJSBHKDHBK

OTP(s)+ shipnames(s): here are some of them!!!!

Pendleshend – Henry and Murphy from silent hill games fr fr my one and only the one that fuels my soul and the character I auto tattoed in my skin lol, they have my life…..

Dreamling- Dream of the endless and Hob Gadling from The Sandman

Red x Green (originalshipping) – Reguri tooooo from Pokémon fr fr one of the few ships I have from uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu long ago fr fr

Vergil x Lady – from DMC, I found them cuteeeeeee nadjbasdkbfhkvbhdhbadckb

Superbat- Cos cos cos the original the supers auuaguwgauwauwaguawugaw

CurlyJim or JimCurly- Moutwashing has taken my soul into its hands and hasn’t let me go……

Bayonetta x Jean-BAYONETTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I love them and I wish to be with them too lol akjsckhdhbkdcbhkcadbhkcadbjca

Reed900- They…and since I could finally play DBH im happy to still have as ship fr fr

Taibani- From Tiger and Bunny….them…..forever and ever….

DanteLeon- cos why not fr fr

If I remember other one I will add it ajdjkankjbddc

Favourite colour: I LOVE GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN GREEEEN FOREVERRRRR

Song stuck in your head: Devils never cry from the DMC 3 ost

Weirdest habit/trait: Sometimes…one has the need to scream…literally…But my family is already used to it so no problem 💪🏽

Hobbies: I like to draw, and paint, and sing (?) Recently I have been trying to go back to sewing and embroidery so probs imma add those too soon 💪🏽

If you work, what’s your profession? I CURRENTLY DON’T WORK AAUUGHHAUUGHHAUUGHH NOOOOO AJAJJAJA

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be? I wanna be a daycare pokemon trainer…. Auughhauughhauughh baby pokemons….

Something you’re good at: catching bugs at my house could be(?) or maybe eating chilli dog cos I can eat a lot of it im the best of the best at eating chilli dog

Something you hate: The price of soluble coffee, that thang is expensive

Something you collect: MARBLESSSSS AIDNADNCJNCAJBCA ia hve three vases and counting 💪🏽

Something you forget: I forgot

What’s your love language: Giving …thingsss(?) idk much about love languages

Favourite movie/show: Suspira both movie, Possession, Solaris, watching baitybaits vods and videos

Favourite food: Chilli dog is my jam, I always ask for it on my bday

Favourite animal: atm the awuawua, The Hyrax, foxes, baby seals, cats, dogs, frogs, possums, baby possums, vaporeon

What were you like as a child: A bit more open, more or less, more naïve, more than the normal amount of naivety, I used to make friends more easily.

Favourite subject at school: Biology

Least favourite subject: Math, Physics, and anything related to numbers fr fr

What’s your best character trait? idk

What’s your worst character trait? I find hard to trust people and keeping friendships too

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be?: Probably made myself to study more things I liked back when I was younger, I could be something else ight now fr fr, like studying Japanese or something

iimmaaaa tags.... (but feel free to ignore frrr frr) @valeriianz @ilulustra @izzy2210 @baronvonriktenstein @celestialvexation @fkwmtzyy @carp302

#ilove....baby animals #a lot #JKABDCKABKDC STEEL BALL RUN CONFIRMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED #tag games

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dawneternal · 7 months ago

Text

The Benevolent | Eleven

☁︎ Eris x Healer OC

☁︎ notes: we will see Eris again next chapter I promise lol

Definitely pictured Nuan's workshop like Tinkerbell's workshop in the old pixie hollow books. (pic here)

Also the clock Nuan gave Aya is inspired by the Egyptian myth about the beetle that pushes the sun across the sky every day.

warnings: none for this one, just a little angst and Aya being hard on herself again.

☁︎ a drawing of Nuan to go with this chapter

☁︎ word count: 3.5k

☁︎ AO3 Link / Masterlist

☁︎ taglist (as always lmk if you want on or off): @cauldronblssd @teddyhoneybear @tele86 @mybestfriendmademe @imma-too-many-fandoms @allyjoe755 @milswrites @shadowdaddies @zenkindoflove @landofpetrichor @secret-third-thing @bookwormysblog @mal-adaptive-dreams @daycourtofficial @roseodelle @sbgal @adventure-awaits13

After Aya's visit to the Night Court, something within her began to settle in a way that she had never hoped for. Something ever moving finally stilled, tamed by the knowledge that what she was had a name.

But as lovely as it was, the quiet was unnerving. As much as she had hoped and prayed for it, now it served as a wide open space for other thoughts to invade.

Welcome or not, the stillness did not last long anyways, because where one ceaseless search had miraculously ended, another began. Before the battle of Hybern, Eris had occupied Aya's thoughts more than she'd like to admit. But now he was like a permanent fixture in her mind - a certain shade of red tinting every facet of her world. It was as if her heart had adopted a new beat, reaching for her mate with every thump,

Find Me Find Me Find Me

There was no call from the Forest House, for which Aya was grateful. There was no telling what impulsive decisions her heart may have made for her. What would it be like to bear her soul to him and tell him what she had learned about herself? Would he be frightened of her power? Or maybe even threatened?

To stave off the incessant pestering of the bond, she spent every spare moment pouring over the stacks of books Rhysand had lent her. So far, they did not offer any new information. But each one was carefully read, notes and references copied into a notebook dedicated to the cause. Each finished book was sent back with a snap, and once or twice over the days a new one was sent back with pages bookmarked with notes in Nesta's neat script.

Videmati Videmati Videmati

The other rhythm of her heart, competing for Eris's attention in her mind, filling every vein with the desire for more knowledge. If she could bottle the feeling of hearing that word for the first time, she would drink it one drop at a time, drawing it out for the entirety of her immortal life.

Perhaps this desire would not be quite so voracious if there were not an underlying feeling that there may be answers closer than she once suspected. This inkling began halfway through her tour of Velaris, in a tinker's shop somewhere in the rainbow. Vague whispers of memories and ideas pulled for her attention, but refused to reveal themselves fully.

One night, as Aya studied another book of magical history under the full moon, she finally understood. The grandfather clock beside her desk struck midnight, the mechanism clicking and whirring as a door below the shining clock face popped open. She watched the little mechanical beetle roll its sunstone orb across a painted pastel sky, so lovingly and painstakingly crafted. Miniature clouds drifted across the scene, fading to nothing as the minute passed, enchanted to return again in another twelve hours. One of her most treasured gifts.

As she thought of the hands that had created such an incredible thing, the book fell from her grasp and clattered to the floor. Nuan. The one who had made this clock. A clock whose mechanical song sounded just Lucien's eye, like a signature of her work. An eye that had abilities nearly identical to Aya's powers.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

Aya crossed the bridge to Nuan’s workshop as slowly as she could manage. Each level of the tower was comprised of open arches, obscured only by creeping vines and drooping flowers. In the upper levels, an enchantment turned the exposed arches into a mirror, reflecting an image of the sky instead of letting anyone see inside.

From the level that connected to the bridge, the clanking of metal and snap of magic was a quick giveaway that Nuan was home and hard at work. Each tall arch was also enchanted to keep out the weather, but it apparently did not keep any sound inside. The inventor did not care much if the outside world could hear the sound of her tinkering.

Aya had visited the workshop a few times, and admittedly held great admiration for it. But there was an uneasiness that crept up on her in Nuan's presence that caused her to avoid her when possible. Aya did not care to examine the source of that uneasiness. Any time she got too close, it began to look something like jealousy.

To Aya, and many others, Nuan was the embodiment of the Dawn Court. Beautiful, clever, and a force to be reckoned with. There was plenty to be jealous of. Face to face with the curtain of ivy that veiled the entrance, the healer chewed her lip. It would be worth any awkwardness, she reminded herself. She could survive this visit.

Nuan found her before she could get any further in her pep talk.

“Aya,” She called, pushing the leaves aside to reveal her smiling face. She had pushed her work goggles back, strands of dark hair sticking up beside them and framing her sweaty brow. Even with smudges of grease across her slender nose and round cheeks, she still looked beautiful.

“Hello,” Aya banished anything but warmth from her expression, “I hope I'm not interrupting you.”

Nuan waved a hand and tilted her head in invitation.

“I was just taking a break actually. Please come in, I haven't seen you in so long.”

Aya stepped through the doorway into the magic of Nuan's workshop. The space was utter chaos - workbenches lined every wall of the tower, each one covered in half finished projects. Cabinets and shelves overflowed with materials and scraps, a few dedicated just to salvaged parts from old clocks and machines. A miniature forge filled the room with heat and smoke, and an apothecary cabinet of enchantment components gave the air an herbal scent. Against the far wall, a set of stairs spiraled up to the second floor, covered in dishes from meals eaten in haste and set aside to be forgotten.

Nuan had a reputation of precision, elegance, and cleanliness. Which is why not just any visitor was allowed in this tower. The inventor insisted that this chaos was the secret to her success. But it may still come as a shock to those who had a certain image in mind.

Aya loved it. The space thrummed with hidden colors and the buzz of magic coming alive with the help of her power.

“I was happy when Thesan told me you wanted to see me,” Nuan began, filling a beat up kettle in the sink. Aya pushed down the pang of guilt that rose in her stomach. She should see Nuan more often, not just when she needed a favor.

“Yes, I had a question for you,” Aya said shyly, choosing an empty stool near the sink.

“Do tell,” Nuan sang, a note in her voice suggesting that perhaps Thesan or Zoren had hinted at some of the recent events in Aya's life. She set the kettle on the hot plate and then leaned forward on the counter, chin propped up in her hands.

Heat crept over the tips of Aya's ears and for a moment she considered indulging and confessing about the bond, but she feared that if she began talking about it, she wouldn't be able to stop herself. So she said instead,

“I learned something about my powers recently.” It was strange to say it out loud. She knew Nuan was aware of her powers, but Aya had never talked much about her magic outside of her family and her mentor. Though it had been Nuan who had delivered her daily dose of faebane to keep her powers hidden from Amarantha.

Her eyes stayed glued on the table, running her finger over a nick in the wood to hide its trembling.

“And?” The excitement in Nuan's voice hit Aya with another twinge of guilt. Nuan genuinely cared for her.

“I'm a videmati,” Aya raised her eyes, watching the inventor carefully. The word still tasted strange on her tongue, though just as delicious as the first time.

“A videmati,” Nuan breathed with heavy reverence, her eyes widening. “That's amazing.”

Aya’s finger stilled on the table as she stared at Nuan, an ache in her chest easing. So she did know what the videmati were. And she was not afraid. How was this the first time Aya was realizing that Nuan always spoke to her as an equal?

The inventor watched her with her chin propped in one hand, waiting with eager eyes for Aya to go on. Nothing in her posture to indicate that she was only humoring the girl before her.

“Please, tell me everything you know,” Aya blurted, spurred by this realization. Her fingers began to tremble again, this time in anticipation.

“I'm sad to say that I don't know much,” Her smile turned to a grimace, “Everything I know came from one chapter in a book.”

“And that was the inspiration for Lucien's eye?”

“It was,” Nuan's dark eyes sparkled, “Very clever of you to figure that out.”

“How did you learn about it?”

She turned and began rifling through collections of books and papers lining the shelves above the worktables behind her. Her long, glossy hair swayed as she moved, and loose papers fluttered to the floor as she carelessly shuffled the stacks around.

“It was a long time ago” Nuan answered, “During a visit to the Day Court, and I bought a copy of the book to bring home.”

She paused, and Aya felt her chest tighten with the hope that it was not a book that Aya had checked already. She had already returned over a dozen back to Rhysand, to be declared as dead ends. Even after checking the extensive references and footnotes of each one.

“It may be worth a visit there, if you haven't tried already.” Nuan went on.

Aya pursed her lips. It definitely would be. An expert could be invaluable. But Thesan was too busy to go with her, and she did not like the idea of visiting on her own. Helion had a way of working gossip out of the most unwilling of victims. He often proved to be a particularly difficult challenge for Aya's social anxiety.

“This may take me a minute,” Nuan moved to a different cabinet, a stack of spare parts clattering to the floor as she opened the glass door that had been holding them in place, “Feel free to look around. Window shop a little.”

Aya had already been skimming, eyes drifting over wooden crates of raw gemstones, jars of marbles, and spools of thick wire in every color. Finished suncatchers, wind chimes, and drying flowers and herbs hung from the rafters. Fae lights bobbed among them, painting the room in their pale glow. A canopy of beautiful things.

“How's the clock holding up?” Nuan's voice drifted over from behind some shelf.

The healer had slid from her stool and begun to move through the room, wings tucked in tight to avoid upsetting any of the precarious piles. The anticipation thrumming in her body would not allow her to sit still while she waited.

“Lovely as ever,” Aya smiled to herself, stopping beside a row of jars, each filled with colorful liquids and half-submerged sticks with crystals growing on them. That clock was one of her most treasured belongings.

“Has it slowed down at all?” Her voice was a bit muffled this time.

“Not at all,” Aya ran her finger over the edge of a small watercolor painting taped to the wall. “It's still very smooth-”

Her voice guttered out as her gaze moved to the next little painting above it. A sparrow sitting on a branch, enchanted to blink at the viewer, an invisible wind ruffling its feathers.

“This is beautiful,” She murmured. Nuan's head appeared again as she scoffed. “Will you paint me one like this? I'll trade you some tonics.”

“You can take that one,” Nuan waved her hand irreverently, “No tonics needed. Sit tight, I'm going to look upstairs.”

Aya was still staring at the painting as Nuan bounded up the stairs. Her boots rattled the ceiling above with each footstep, making a few of them wind chimes sway and sing.

Gingerly, she pulled the paper from its place on the wall and held it in her hands. As the little bird blinked at her, alarmingly life-like, Eris’s voice echoed in her mind. The moment he found her after the battle. Her skin burned as if it was only a moment ago that he had held her face in his hands. Seemingly the last simple moment between them before everything grew so complicated.

Would Eris react as Nuan had, if she told him what she was? What would he think, having a mate with such strange and rare powers? Her fingers tightened on the paper as she wondered - would Eris know anything about the videmati?

It felt like only a minute that she stood there, reveling in the memory of that moment, all of her wonderings whirling through her mind like snowflakes. But the next thing she knew, Nuan had appeared beside her again.

“I didn't know you liked birds so much,” She said softly.

“Oh,” Aya blushed, finally setting the painting aside, “It's a newer interest, I suppose.”

That twinkle returned to Nuan's eyes, like she knew a little more than she let on, but she said nothing more about it.

“Here,” She held out a leather-bound book, “This is it.”

Aya read the title hungrily, and her heart sank to the ground. A lump formed in her throat as hopes she'd forgotten were dashed.

“What's wrong?” Nuan's brows drew together and she tilted her head, trying to catch Aya's eye.

“I already have this one,” Aya swallowed hard and met Nuan's gaze, plastering on a smile, “I'm very grateful for your help.”

“Oh no,” Nuan frowned, “I'm sorry I don't have any more.”

“It's alright,” Aya mustered a small smile.

A moment passed and then Nuan asked, “Do you need someone to go to the Day Court with you? I imagine Thesan is too busy to go. Unless you'd want to ask Zoren instead.”

Aya looked up, throat sore from swallowing tears and the shame of her childish disappointment.

“Why would you do that?” She croaked, “I've never been a very good friend to you. I don't deserve your kindness.”

“What do you mean?” Nuan asked, bewildered. She frowned again and shook her head. “You've been a perfectly good friend to me, Aya. You're always so hard on yourself.”

Aya was quiet, looking down at the book in her hands. A single tear dropped from the tip of her nose and landed on the worn leather.

“You have nothing to punish yourself for, Aya,” Nuan said softly. Her hand landed gently on the girl’s shoulder, “You push people away because you think you didn't deserve them. But the truth is, that just deprives us, too.”

Aya shut her eyes tight, tears falling onto the leather cover with a soft patter. Aya knew she was hard on herself. Those feelings were a slog she walked through daily - a weight that was not as easy to shed as people made it sound. ‘Be easier on yourself,’ She heard many times. A command, as though her problem was obedience.

But the way that Nuan said it made Aya feel as though the inventor knew. It was not commanded, not even a chide. She was reaching through the fog in Aya's mind and placing the words there like seeds in a bed of soil. To grow and bloom.

Aya had not realized that Nuan had drifted away to give her a moment alone. Until she let out a frustrated groan, making Aya jump.

“Oh, Mother,” Nuan stood by the hot plate, frowning at the silent kettle. “No wonder the kettle never boiled. I never turned the hot plate on.”

Aya could not suppress her giggle, her already bubbling emotions promptly turning it into roaring laughter that would not make sense to anyone else if she tried to explain it. Nuan laughed with her just as uncontrollably, cheeks pink from embarrassment.

Their laughter faded into soft conversation, Nuan apologizing a few more times for not being able to help more. She recalled everything she knew about videmati powers just in case, and promised help in every way she could think of.

Aya determined to find some way to show her appreciation. For her efforts to help and also her friendship. Despite the aching disappointment, Aya was happy to simply bask in the presence of someone who cared for her as she was.

A long, comfortable silence settled between them. Aya cradled her tea cup in her hands, drinking in the warmth of it, trying not to let it remind her of certain fiery autumnal powers. Every once in a while, Nuan would hum to herself, eyebrows drawn close together as she was lost deep in the thought. Eventually, she returned to the present moment and drew the quiet to a close.

“I like your sash,” Nuan tilted her head, gazing at the beaded waistband of Aya's skirt. A pattern of lotus flowers was embroidered into the pink fabric. “Lotuses are often a symbol of new beginnings.”

She took a sip of her tea and murmured through the steam dancing above her cup, “And power.”

The words echoed, resonating with something in Aya's heart that she had not yet named, but had been making its way to the surface. And with that, she realized how tired she'd become. The sky surrounding Nuan's tower was slowly sinking into a gentle crimson as the sunset approached. She was ready to go home, to lay down and let her mind sort through everything she'd learned as she slept. Tiredness seemed to hit her so much faster these days.

Even still, Aya said farewell with a lighter heart. Even the disappointments of her visit could not weigh her down. Not with a new friend and so many possibilities on the horizon. Nuan's words continued to wind through her thoughts, both thrilling and foreboding.

As she passed back under the curtain of ivy, a sweet and almost spicy scent caught her attention. Something vaguely autumnal.

A pot of calendula flowers sat just outside the archway, surrounded by several other planters to adorn the main entry.

With that scent overwhelming her senses, Aya remembered something she had not thought about in a very long time. Perhaps it was fate, or the mother, or a mind preoccupied by new beginnings. She was not sure what exactly placed the thought at the forefront of her attention. But she decided to indulge it, wherever it had come from.

Peeking back into the workshop, she caught no glimpse of the inventor. She’d probably retired to her room upstairs. But anyways, Nuan was always so generous, she likely wouldn't mind one borrowed flower.

Aya plucked one of the lovely golden flowers from its stem and scurried away, heart pounding with anticipation.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

Chamomile for clarity

Chrysanthemum for hope

Calendula for the mother

The old wives tale had been nearly lost in Aya's memory. Her cheeks flushed as she stirred honey into her cup of tea, feeling a little embarrassed over what she was about to do.

But she'd heard others swear by it, that the little spell worked. A cup of chamomile tea before bed, a smear of chrysanthemum oil over the heart, and a calendula placed under the pillow as an offering to the mother. The combination would allow one to dream of the bond. And if one used the spell before a mating bond had snapped, whatever dream that followed would contain hints of their future match.

If it did not work, and all Aya woke up to was wasted oil and a crushed flower under her pillow, she would feel incredibly foolish. But no one would ever know, and the components were easy enough to gather.

And how was she supposed to make any sort of decision when she had no idea how Eris felt at all?

The healer breathed deep and downed the last of the tea before crawling into bed. The stolen flower was placed carefully under her pillow, and a dot of sweet-smelling oil applied above her heart.

Aya pulled her blankets tightly around herself, closed her eyes, and sent one last desperate plea to the mother.

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

Sleep carried her away faster than it had in weeks now, pulling her away to a world dappled in golden sunshine. Billowing clouds filled the sky, tinted lovely colors by an iridescent dawn. Aya stood on a bridge carved of sunstone, the structure seemingly inspired by the intricate architecture of the Autumn Court. Torches lit the bridge at intervals, filling the half-translucent stone with light, as if it was lit from within by embers and flames.

Aya could have sworn she felt the cool, smooth stone beneath her feet, too real to be just a dream. She remembered her ritual, but nothing of the time it had taken to fall asleep. Unusual, since that state of in-between was lately occupied with dark and painful memories.

But the spell worked. She was here, seeing the bond with her own eyes. And it was beautiful.

Drawing in a deep breath, she began the journey across the bridge before her, toward the tall, foreboding

#acotar #acotar fic #acotar fanfic #acotar fanfiction #eris vanserra #eris acotar #eris x healer #eris x oc #healer oc #acotar oc #dawn court healer #dawn court oc #dawn court #the dawn court #nuan acotar #eris fanfic #eris fanfiction #the benevolent

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