#LOINCLOTH THATS IT THATS WHAT ITS CALLED

[ask-eden]

Alaxia fills his glass practically to the rim, almost spilling it over. Alaxia: I don't particularly enjoy wearing black all that much anyways... Or silver accents either.. Not really my "thing". But you go with what the Boss wants. Alaxia's eyes flicker over to Amber, still somewhat visibly irritated Alaxia: and it's MISTER by the way. Just because I'm wearing a dress doesn- Alaxia catches himself, biting his lip in irritation. He needed to be nice.. presentable.. kind. If he caused a scene Etoile would intervene and god knows how little he wanted that Mew near him. So he swallowed down the laundry list of insults he was about to spew and forced a small smile in a vague attempt to be friendly Alaxia: ...You should be more careful when addressing others if you aren't aware of what they go by... Just a thought. Lest you really upset someone.. Alaxia turns back to his table, attempting to chug down what was left in his glass. Feebly attempting to drown out his irritation with wine. Meanwhile, suspiciously all the deviled egg trays have gone empty very suddenly...

-- -- -- [ @askpokemoncrossover ] [ Background by @/sinnohsiblings ]

[onskepa]

Unlista chapter 1

Hey hey hey!! here is where the series begins! Had to re-write this a couple of times! Hopefully this is good! Enjoy! <3 Uniltsa series

[first pov]

I expected a light, I expected some holy gate to heaven or if some miracle, the hospital. But instead, I opened my eyes to see metallic walls and floors, full of lights in weird styles. Funny enough I dont have a headache despite being hit by a truck. Still, looking around I immediately notice, this isn't some health facility. This doesn't look remotely like anything I know at all! Looking down at my hands and legs, its my body, I am still the same me, thats good. So, where the fuck am I?

Looking down, I almost screamed the top of my lungs. There is a big, blue giant thing in the same room as me. Quickly yet quietly I moved to the farthest part of the room. Honestly I should be screaming but who out there will help me? Am I being kidnapped?! Nothing made sense to me. My head was delirious and I am just assuming so much none sense in my brain.

Suddenly the blue thing moved and groaned and muttered something under its breathe. So it talks?

"ean...? up already? thats new" that voice.......there is no freaking way.....

I couldnt help it, my mouth moved on its own, "l-lo'ak...?".

The blue being sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning. The familiar hair style, the voice, the clothing, the FREAKING STRIPES!!

"yeah?" he responds. I just stared at him. Getting a good look at his face. He is real. Lo'ak is real. Getting closer to him I was just amazed. If lo'ak is real then.....

Quickly I ran out of the room and out into the unknown facility. Cold metal everywhere, high tech computers, holograms, sci-fi looking stuff everywhere! It was a lot in one sight.

[third pov]

The girl could help but laugh. Laugh like was some joke to her. Many of the science guys turns to stare at her. Confused, norm stepped closer to her. "hey....you ok? lo'ak said some joke of the century or what?" he asked but the girl kept laugh. Lo'ak stepped out of the room being just as confused as the rest.

"I take she had a good sleep??" another familiar voice was heard. Spider, walking up to the three. He looked down to see his friend laughing, not like something was funny, but laughing like there is something she cant believe.

She stopped laughing and quickly got up. "I NEED A MINUTE!!" she shouted and ran back in her room.

"is she having her-"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!"

"nope too early to deal with this" norm held his hands up and left. That left lo'ak and spider looking at each other in confusion. This is definitely out of the range of what their friend does. Spider feeling concerned knocked on the door, "hey uniltsa? you ok?" he asks. No answer. Turning to lo'ak who shrugged his shoulders. Before anything else is said, the doors opened once more, with their friend wide eyes.

"w-what did you say?" she asks nervously. "uniltsa? you know we call you that since forever" lo'ak provides.

[first pov]

ok ok. Uniltsa. A nick name. Same with spider. I can go with that. I dont know if my name is the same in this world. "y-yeah" i muttered out. Taking a deep breathe I tried to keep my cool. "haha sorry, I honestly dont know what happened to me. I guess I must have had a crazy dream last night" I laughed it out scratching my head. They seem to buy it. "just give me a another minute to change yeah?" I shut the door once more and looked around for whatever clothes there might be. In a box at the corner were....stuff? There were what I guess are loinclothes and tops with beads and feathers. Did this world me dressed like a na'vi? like spider? There were still things I am so confused about but I just gotta roll with it.

Putting some of the......clothes on, I felt super naked. I remember that na'vi don't care much of exposed body, but still! I looked at a mirror for the first time. I dont look all that different from real world me. Speaking of, what happened to my body? are my parents ok? Parents? do I have parents in this world? Taking a deep sigh once more I collected myself again. I think I look fine enough.

Leaving the room to see lo'ak and spider chatting. "So you finally calmed down with whatever was going on?" lo'ak asked me. So crazy he is talking me. "Y-yeah, I'm good!" I quickly responded. Not much of a reaction with what I am wearing. I take it that is a good sign.

"well ready to go? we're gonna miss breakfast" lo'ak said as he grabs my hand. The size was massively big. Seeing him on the tv screen is one thing, but to have him in front of me and really feel his hand. Wow.

[third pov]

Uniltsa, as they called her that, was confused but did her best not to show it. Lo'ak grabbed her hand and lead the way out. She noticed they were heading towards the exit of the laboratory. Remembering clearly from the movies, the pandora air was toxic to humans. Where as the masks. Why isnt spider getting a mask? Scared deep down, she took a deep breathe and the doors open to the outside world.

She closed her eyes, waiting for something, but that something never came. She opened her mouth, letting the pandora air flow in her lungs. Uniltsa wasn't gasping, not short of breathe, nothing. Nothing like how she remembered from the films. Something changed for sure.

Spider took a deep breathe, soaking in the sun and the fauna. "Damn, your invention never fails uniltsa. Come on, I know tuk is the gonna get the good ones before we make it!" spider says as he makes a run for it. Lo'ak shouted after him, and before uniltsa knew it, lo'ak picked her up in his arms and ran to meet up with spider.

Uniltsa make a squeaking sound. Lo'ak picked her up. Lo'ak is carrying her in his arms like she weighs nothing, Lo'ak who is real, breathing, living, his skin she can touch.

As he ran, uniltsa looked all over their surrounding. The trees, the plants, the insects, the sky, the water, the flower, all of it. It was real. Pandora is real. If this is truly a dream, uniltsa wishes to never wake up.

And that is it for chapter 1! chapter is definitely already in the works, wanna make this good for everyone! Hope you all enjoyed it! until next time!

Uniltsa = dream of, dream about, dream (that)

Taglist: @tojisleftarm

[sucrows]

knock knock o/ 👉👈 i have... many madara mikejima thoughts. and im still thinking abt mutual obsession with him so uhhhhhh cw unhealthy relationship? we know why we're here... excuse me being annoyingly longwinded orz this is barely sexy. this is just me thinking abt mama im so sorry crow aaaaa

madara mikejima is the guy who would be at your service at all times— no questions just pure devotion. for as long as he is around you, you might as well say you have your own personal assistant. theres so many examples of him doing stuff for others and i will never shut up abt his fs1 where anzu was like hey what if your exclusive outfit was just a loincloth and he was on board purely bc she likes it. HE HAS 0 SHAME IN DOING EVERYTHING YOU SAY. NONE. YOU COULD ASK HIM TO BARK AND HE WILL. when that guy loves someone, he craves them with his entire being and desires nothing more than to be in their life.

he's also not above just. asking for a fwb situation. he wouldn't be so blunt about it, but it'd be a slow coercing. mama isn't above lying about his motives either. maybe he sees you're stressed and hey. let him massage your shoulders. lay down. oh your back is just tense huh? and it escalates until he's just fucking you with reckless abandon. well your stress is gone now so he offers to make this a regular thing. no strings attached and no worries. he just wants to make you relaxed.

here's where it gets messy. mama is also out of town a lot for work. he goes overseas, just touring around. but bc he spends every waking moment he is in town attached to your hip, his absence is so. prominent. and god it feels so awful not seeing him. phone calls arent enough. good morning and goodnight texts are sporadic because he's so busy. you miss having mama around to hold you while you do work.

and it's not great for him either. he's constantly worried about you. he can't get you out of his head. when he finally gets back it's like he's moved heaven and earth buying you various trinkets that reminded him of you (some even extremely rare and valuable since... he just collects those things anyway)

just. intense back and forth of hapoiness being with him every single day to devastating loneliness whenever he leaves. each time he comes back, ofc intense welcome home sex ensues. but it never goes past the fwb stage. any deeper feelings he's harboured are shoved aside and he grows distant when he feels like you want to get even closer. he always wants what he can't have. and he'd rather you not be caught up in whatever bullshit he goes through so he lies to himself saying he's content with meaningless sex and just doing things for you. even when you have consumed his entire thoughts. yet he's unaware that you are much the same. craving him more and more that you wanna get through to him. but HIS FUCKASS LONESOME WAYS MAKES YOU HESITATE. SO YALL JUST GO NOWHERE. AND ITS JUST A "what are we?" LOOP

mf.... madara just will not communicate. he can't go beyond superficial desires and acts of service because it scares him to face the fact these feelings have grown wildly out of control. it scares him because the moment he does, he fears his own self destructive tendencies will take over and he'll just ruin everything. whats more is that imo i think he would still unconsciously do things like distance himself, not speak to you for days even after coming back as like a way for you to grow to resent him. that way if things crumble he can just say oh the signs were there as if he didn't put those flags up himself.

uh yea 💚 thats all. uhm. unrelated i think youre super cool and i hope ya have/had a good day dependin on when you get to this 💚

minty i am going to become the JOKER if you do not stop apologizing for things i actively invited you to do and that is a THREAT /lh

anyways, this is soooo tasty idgaf if it's more angsty than horny i'm eating this up anyways, thank you for the meal 🙏

Madara Mikejima, King of Miscommunication. He adores you and puts you on such a high pedestal that it becomes nearly impossible to convince him to stand by your side as your equal. He believes that you deserve better so much but he's also too selfish to give you up. He's not worthy of you, but neither is anyone else.

He wants the emotional intimacy. He wants the domesticity. He wants everything. Hell, he probably indulges in these things pretty often in a FWB relationship, but he can't ever tie you down. The moment he gets the inclination that you're getting too attached, he runs. When you're truly in a time of need he will always be there for you but otherwise he's as fickle as the wind.

It's a horrendously painful but addicting relationship that neither of you can truly break off

[matchamabs]

I know you didn’t ask for it but- BOTW MONSTERS: RANKED BY HOW HOT THEY ARE,,,,

i do fuck all in the days lemme tell ya

ill admit i havent done EVERY enemy but like. i do enjoy making these posts so who knows, i might actually rank everything sooner or later 🤷‍♀️

,,,,, and if u want a specific ranking of botw/aoc stuff lmk 👀

ahh the ol reliable. the classic bokoblin. he is just a little lad! unfortunately they’re genuinely kind of ugly??? and the idk the singular horn in the middle aint a good look. i see cute comics abt these guys being domestic and thats adorable but also giving them so much leeway bc they’re really Not that cute. not sure what the loincloth is hiding and im not sure i wanna know anyway. 3/10 really kind of. not good. 

slightly bigger loincloth only means slightly bigger things to hide :( i rlly hate these guys noses and whatever the fuck toenails they have why do they have toenails?????? s’bad. the thing is tho they have the proportions of a potentially attractive gerudo which is probably what takes the edge off the general vibes of... u know... being an abomination. its also only JUST occured to me as im writing that these guys r just evolved bokoblins so. glow up i guess. 6/10 what that tongue do

ok bypassing whatever the fuck rule 34 has done to these guys, i actually dig them. i find the huge fat ones way cuter than the lil bug eyed ones. in their case theres rlly no, like... hotness about them. its just cute. i think they’re cute. any monster that is cute and also doubles up as a bed gets my vote 7/10 get urself a fella as flexible as these guys 

u know what, im gonna say it, these guys r actually kinda hot. proportions arent super bad, the face aint bad and generally they have good vibes. aside from, u know, when they’re tryna shank u. id say one of the most bearable monsters to have to look at. 8/10 im not a scalie

??????????? idk what to say. u could tie these little shits to like swingball poles and beat them with rackets thatd b good. aside from that these guys have like no redeeming qualities. they’re a pain in the ass and not in a good way. 3/10 cute but like. is it worth it?

i mean,,,,,,,, someones probably into it. i dont like these guys for a lot of reason and surprisingly the thing that gets me is the fucking hair why does it have that hair its like he-man just went straight over the top with an electric razor its not a good look!!! stop trying to make it work! it wont! and again with the loincloth??? im not into it. the only thing i like abt these guys is the lil waistcoats. they have some amount of decency (but the implications it makes are Not Good). uh. 2/10. barely.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

,,,,,9/10. but if you see a lynel up close like that chances are you died about half a minute ago

again. ??? i dont rlly like. i mean. im digging the top heavy proportions? its got the same body type as kass so like. 4/10. bit plain around the features but what can u do. i dont understand how but the igneo taluses are like. sexier 

UGHGHHH I FUCKING HATE THESE THINGS okay okay okay like these motherfuckers lure u in by being quite cute and dancin around and then u get a look at their faces and its like fucking JESUS and its even WORSE when you see under their cloak and they have no necks????? and like????? they do that gay little fucking dance that pisses me off???? they’re wearing hoods that give the ILLUSION that they have necks and im im fumin ok i HATE it i hate it i have been betrayed and i will NEVER FORGET ABOUT IT UGHGHGHG I HATE THESE CUNTS -10000000000000000000000000000000000/10 die

hhhhh i just dont like em. theyre too annoying to be cute now. and whats gonna happen if i squeeze one? is like. water gonna come out? r they just gonna deflate? 4/10 tentacles are not hyrules forte it seems ://

trust kohga to send the twinks out on the front line. seriously. they’re not bad tho? kinda small and underwhelming :((( tho i give extra points for the good crazy laugh we love a good manic cackle 6/10 they dont really count as monsters but ah well where else am i gonna put em

now THATS what im talkin about babeyyyyy we love the muscles,,,,, the posture,,, the stride,,, we love it when u fuck up stealth and a torrential downpour of these motherfuckers come down to beat ur ass,,,,, 9/10 its raining men 😎

u know. u dont rlly like. get a good view of these guys when ur balls deep in a battle with them, but the more i get like closer looks at them the more i go ???? like idk. everything about them looks backwards and wrong. but as far as backwards and wrong goes its not a bad look and the boss theme is a banger so 4/10 maybe dont jump on my ass every time i step one foot onto the desert :/

i just. i dont dig it. idk why. aside from the fact they’re a monumental pain in my ass, and now everytime i hear a beep even slightly resembling a guardian i shit my pants, but. idk??? as far as robots go its not like. terrible. they’re like the milfs of robots. the milves, if u will. a rilf. except i wouldnt. so its more like riwlf. but even that leaves too much up to interpretation so im just gonna call em a cunt and go. 4/10 leg game strong

here we are,,, the big boys,,,, waterblight isnt too bad i will admit, but the spear hand is both annoying and mildly inconvenient. its got a rlly big chest but rlly thin arms?? also not sure how i feel abt the strap on beard but oh well its not like ganons got taste. 5/10 kind of average for a blight i think

a hefty motherfucker. a chunk of a lad. big large. the fact this is like one of the easiest blights makes it more forgiveable to me but like whatever its got going on with the 80s hair needs 2 be sorted out. i like its moves but it doesnt hang upside down like waterblight :((( 5/10 calm down kate bush

ok who doesnt like gun arms. and a gun back. this things like fuckin megatron. the whole face plate thing doesnt look bad either. honestly its kind of a look? but its dickheadery in aoc makes me wanna set shit on fire so :// 6/10 hot but will not leave u alone 😔

ok this one is by FAR the sexiest of all the blights. i just cant explain it. i like guys with bad posture. i had an easy time beating it but apparently its given other people a lot of grief and that makes it 10x more sexy to me lmaooo. also it can clone itself which is like. thats a win. 8/10 ganon spilt all the sexy juice into this one

ok i didnt realise how many arms this motherfucker has and the whole hairline behind the ears thing is not a great look. especially w the beard. in fact the longer i look at it the less sexy it becomes tbh. 3/10 they tried to make arachnophobia sexy and it didnt work

10/10 i will be taking questions in my inbox but i wont be taking constructive criticism and you cant make me