#LJ MY MAN WHY DID YOU FUCK THAT OLD MAN!!!!!

[the-acid-pear]

Like I swear to god idk how monkey rizzed up LJ. I don't know how else to say it I didn't know he had it in him. He's literally 80 years old. And he was fucking him standing too no less idk how his peg leg didn't give up on him like god. It's so fucking funny. How did we get to this 💥

[ladysarai]

@inception30daychallenge day 1: my favorite thing about the movie

I think my FAVORITE thing about Inception is how MUCH there is to it, as a movie. You can watch it a zillion times and get something new from it every time, and you can read one person's take and be impressed and amazed because you didn't even think of that take!

But what REALLY makes me sit up and pay attention to a piece of media is Characters, and Relationships. I love how MUCH the cast did with so very little... I want to know EVERYTHING about Arthur's relationships with Mal and Dom, (okay, ESPECIALLY Mal) just because of the way he calls Mal "lovely" and because of the way he PUTS UP with Dom and follows him around and has obviously been loyal through So Much Shit and then the way he SMILES in the end. Cobb himself is a hot mess, and given only the context of the movie, you have to wonder why anyone would put up with the things he puts Arthur through, so there has to be a history there, right?? And OF COURSE I'm here for Arthur and Eames and their shared history, whatever that may be (they're married okay). The fact that in the paper script, Arthur and Eames could have been played so differently by two other actors is... It's a little awe inspiring, and just makes you really appreciate what actors can bring to their roles.

I love that every single time I watch it, there is something new to notice, some new nuance to pick up on, a new piece of canon that can be used to spin out headcanon or fic from. And I absolutely ADORE that so much is open-ended and there's no real WRONG interpretation; I think that's what's given the fandom such lasting power over the years. We're give so little actual canon that very little fanon is actually contradicted. It's kind of beautiful that way.

On a personal note... When I say that I'm new to the Inception fandom, I mean BRAND NEW... like as of April of this year new. Which is not to say I didn't see the movie when it came out in 2010, because I did! I watched it more than once! But here's the thing... You ever have those experiences where OTHER PEOPLE ruin a thing for you before you give it a chance yourself?

That's what happened with me and Inception. I thought "hey, fun movie" and left it at that. Largely because my younger brother was in this weird "I'm a Movie Connoisseur/Expert and My Opinion is the One That Counts" stage and as someone with self-proclaimed "man crush" on Leo, he was All About Cobb, who is easily my LEAST favorite character. He was also All About arguing for the "it's all a dream" theory over the ending, which I think beautifully demonstrates the main difference between us: I am an optimist and prefer happy endings. So he would Not Shut Up about this movie and how GROUNDBREAKING it was and how the pessimistic viewing of the ending was the Only True Way to watch the movie. (May I say how much I fucking love that this has generally been disproved in the last 14 years? Because I have serious Schadenfreude over that.)

(I was also RPing in a panfandom LJ game at the time with people who were obsessed with playing characters played by Certain Actors and our game wound up with an Arthur and an Ariadne and I think they shipped them but it was full of ~drama~ and I wanted nothing to do with it so I kept my Barbies on my corner of the game and avoided theirs.)

ANYWAY, this is a very convoluted and long-winded way to get to my point. Which is that I largely forgot about Inception for the last 13 years-ish. Then I was rereading some old fanfics in March and because I liked an author, I went to see what other fandoms they'd written for. And somehow I fell into Inception and discovered Arthur/Eames, and HOW THE FUCK DID I MISS THAT????? After a few weeks of reading fic, I decided to watch the movie again and, well. Then I was watching it every other day for several weeks.

Moderation? What's that?

So another favorite thing about this movie is that I got back into fandom for the first time in... god. Almost ten years???? Because of it. Which is a little miraculous by itself.

[raina-at]

Fic writer 20 Questions

Thanks for the tag, @khorazir!

How many works do you have on AO3?

29 fics, three J2 RPS, 1 Supernatural, the rest is Sherlock.

What’s your total AO3 wordcount?

490,267 (though I have to add that a lot of my old fics aren’t on AO3, my overall word count must be well over a million.)

What fandoms do you write for?

In the past, Star Wars, Supernatural, Harry Potter, RPS. Right now it’s Sherlock, and has been for a while. And I don’t see that changing any time soon.

What are your top five fics by kudos?

Bakers with Benefits

Don’t Read the Last Page

Running Obliquely

Take Two

All I Want for Christmas (is Proof)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always respond to comments, or at least I try my best to. It’s only polite, people took time to give me feedback, the least I can do is to thank them for their time. 

 What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don’t do angsty endings, my fics all end happily ;-)

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hm. Well. All my fics end on a happy note, but for me, it’s probably Spare Parts because that happy ending was the one I felt was the hardest won. But I do have a soft spot for the last chapter of Bakers with Benefits, because that was also a long road, both for Sherlock and for me.

Do you get hate on fics?

Hasn’t happened so far. Granted, I only posted one of my many, many Wincest stories, so maybe if I had more of them on AO3, but as it stands, I never got hate on one of my fics, and I hope it stays this way. The odd rude comment, but no hate.

Do you write smut?

Yup. But not a lot of it. I find the older I get the less smut I write, probably because it’s starting to feel repetitive. Which is funny, because I’ve written hundreds of love confessions and I never get tired of those. 

Do you write crossovers?

Not yet. If the inspiration strikes, I might yet write one, but so far I haven’t.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of. I’m not on Wattpad and the likes, so there might be some stolen copies of my works out there, but who knows. Someone once told me about this person who plagiarized one of my J2 fics and re-wrote it as a Degrassi het fic, but the person had already deleted their account, so I couldn’t verify it. That was… bizarre. 

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, several. Speak Now was translated into Spanish, Bakers with Benefits into French and Without Complexities or Pride into Russian.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

My darling wife @nuttersinc and I co-wrote thousands of words of fic. We hosted fests and LJ communities, ran an online RPG together and co-wrote a huge fic series that we abandoned when we both fell out of that fandom at the same time. We haven’t been in the same fandom since back in our Supernatural days, but we did just about everything fandom spouses can do together except host a podcast ;-)

14 .  What’s your all time favourite ship?

I mean… Johnlock just has The Dynamic down to a science. You can do so much with them. You can do anything. They’re so wonderfully perfect for each other in all their fucked-up, flawed, deeply human glory. But having said that, I have a weak spot deep in my heart for Mulder and Scully, because they were so important to me as a teenager, and they led me to fandom and fanfic. They’re the first ship that truly owned my soul. So a part of my heart will always belong to them.

(They also led me to my second favourite het ship of all time, Peter Wimsey and Harriet Vane, because Mulder compared himself and Scully to Peter and Harriet in one of my favourite fics, so of course I had to go read the books, and man, that’s a Dynamic, right there. Two whip-smart, emotionally extremely vulnerable people both desperately wanting and being deadly scared of true intimacy. I eat that up with a spoon. Also love the ‘man totally besotted with the smart, independent woman cutting his ego down to size’ dynamic.)

15. What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh, so MANY. I never post WIPS because I want to feel free to abandon stories whenever, so I’m the only one haunted by my WIP folder, but there’s a few in there I would really like to come back to one of these days. But never say never, the first three pages of Nothing Gold Can Stay sat in there for MONTHS, gestating. You never know.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I can only say what I enjoy writing, I hope that joy translates itself to the page. I love writing dialogue and I think I’m pretty good at it. I think I’m good at pacing, and I think I’m good at making people Feel Things.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I sometimes lose patience with plot. Because I mostly use plot as a means for character development, I sometimes lose patience with my own plots. That mostly happens in the fics I don’t finish, and it’s mostly the reason I don’t finish the fic. I’m also not especially good at handling large casts of characters, many of my fics have very few characters.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic? 

Honestly, it hasn’t come up yet. I would only do it in German, because that’s my native language, otherwise I’d be too worried to get it wrong. I don’t generally like it when conversations aren’t translated. Othewise I have no strong feelings about it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Wrote? X-Files. Posted? Roswell.

20. Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Oh, that’s hard. The ones I loved writing the most are probably Take Two and my J2 highschool AU. I wrote both very quickly in a sort of fugue state, and it just feels amazing when that happens. The one I enjoy re-visiting the most? Bakers with Benefits.

Tagging @keirgreeneyes @jrow @discordantwords @thetimemoves and anyone else who wants to do this.

[slumped-in-the-arms-of-fiction]

N I C O L E

For the fic meme 😘

Ahhhh, you're so cute, I love you 😍😍😍😍 Thanks babe, excellent letter choices 😉

N: Any fic ideas brewing that you’d care to share?

Ohhh, so many. Too many. I tend to get a bolt of inspiration, start writing, and then get waylaid by another idea. But one I am making some inroads in at the moment is a weird little ✨time✨ fic, but I don't want to give anything away for that. We'll see if it works out LOL

I: How many fandoms have you written in?  Do you have a favorite?

*joints start creaking* back in my LJ days I wrote for Supernatural mostly, but d(r)abbled in a few others like True Blood. But yeah, three mostly – SPN early seasons, Gilmore Girls and Hellcheer, the latter two being the only ones on AO3. I got into writing later than most and also took a massive break. Hellcheer is my absolute 100% most favourite ever, in case no-one realised 🙃

C:  How did you come up with the title to [insert fic]?

I'm gonna just pick one, lemme see. "Those were days of roses" is a line from the Tom Waits song Martha, which I just adore – in it an elderly man contacts an old flame to see if she remembers him. The short little fic is just a chance meeting when Eddie and Chrissy are middle-aged and haven't seen each other in 20 years. I tried to imbue the sense of melancholy from the song into the fic, but gave them a little more hope, I think.

O: What are your thoughts on people writing fanfic of your fanfic?

Uhm, sure, go for it! I don't think anyone would, I don't think any of it would particularly lend itself to it, but inspiration strikes from anywhere!

L:  Which of your fanfics was the most emotionally challenging to write?

Most of my Hellcheer stuff is a bit of fun and not really emotionally taxing, I think. But my GG fic Not Time's Fool, maybe? I wrote the spaces between canon, so trying to see how Rory and Jess could move forward with those events took a bit of meditation on my part on why they would and how they could.

E: What character do you identify with most?  Is there a certain fic of yours that captures these qualities particularly well?

I don't know about identify, but there are some qualities in Eddie that feel like me. Or maybe that's just the Eddie I write – I probably write him lighter than canon tbh 😆 While I didn't stand on tables and act out so dramatically, I have always been someone who is a bit of a clown, who has a sarcastic comment or dumbass quip. Which fic shows that best? Fucked if I know. Maybe my New Girl fic, or Mary Jane?

(Also the sense of bottled up rage, or rage that simmers under the surface that Eddie has in some canon scenes. That's me too LMFAO)

Thanks for the ask, my love! If anyone else wants to read more waffle like this, check out the ask meme!

[wily-one24]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @rowark (If "anyone who wants to" counts as tagging, and I am going to, so there. If that makes you angry, perhaps you need a nap?).

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 56.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 1,248,713.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The main ones I have written for include Profiler, Buffy, Firefly, Veronica Mars, Once Upon A Time.

And most recently Law and Order: SVU.

I have delved into other fandoms such as The Inside, Rizzoi and Isles, Supergirl, and Heroes.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Memory Cloud - 1,413

Paint It Black - 1,320

The Blue Moon - 811 (it's the smut, isn't it? I know it, you pervs).

The Waning Moon - 783

Elmo's ABCs - 744

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to. I respond to as many as possible. Especially if the fic is fresh. But I have responded to comments on fics that are months/years old. I do miss some comments, sometimes I'm busy and my brain says "I'll get to that later", but then my brain is... not perfect... and it forgets.

However, I love responding to comments. I have made friends in the comments. I have the best discussions in my comments.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh, geez. Like, you're asking me, the Queen of Angst? There were LJ icons with "Jacqui + Angst = OTP". Maybe if I go by fandoms? Firefly's angstiest ending was "DIdn't Mean Nothin'", but also "Pieces" had a super angsty epilogue.

Veronica Mars' angstiest ending? I mean, they were mostly angst middles, weren't they? Super dark middles with hopeful endings. Veronica did bring out the optimist in me. She was so young, she deserves her life to improve after all the shit canon put her through. I guess if I had ever finished "Bitter Revenge" it would have been a tad angsty? But there would have been hope, becauses he would have had the baby!

Swan Queen, whoo. Um, OH YEAH, "You and Me (We Wanted It All)". HA, that was angst a'plenty. Even PIB and Memory Cloud had hopeful (if not happy) endings. But that one was... just some light angst for angst sake.

I mean I only have three fics with SVU, (two of which form part of a series), and only one of which is finished. BUT, I can with confidence say that "Wicked Game" ends pretty fucking bleakly and angstily.

(okay, so I went back to my VM fic masterlist on LJ, and whew, okay, so there's a whole bunch of "exploration" fics that don't necessarily change canon, just delve into it like "Neptune CA Mother's Club" deals with the shit poor mothers in Neptune, "Courting Disaster" devles into Logan's abuse, "The Tender Bruise" and "Bruises In the Mirror" were both angst fests that didn't end happily per se. Also, "The Ghost and Mrs Mars" was... not hopeful at all. Man, I *forgot* a LOT of them).

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

🤣🤣🤣

Ok, let me think. I'm assuming we're not talking smut fics? LIke, happy endings? 'Cause I have a bunch of PWPs which could be considered 'happy'. But... let's say what a reasonable person might be called happy...

I think "Sleep Perchance" was pretty optimistic and its sequel "... To Dream" was set to end in a much more positive place than it began. "Whisky Bears" was just a fun fic, drunken fun on a spaceship. What more do you want? And "Boobs" was just silly.

"The Best Deceptions"!! That was such a good fluffy sweet fic. It's a WIP, so no ending, but still. OMG, I forgot this one. It's my only real non-angst fluff fic.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I used the laughing so hard I cried emoji too early, didn't I?

I mean, I would say usually not. I have spent decades in fandom and Once Upon A Time was the only fandom I got hate in.

A small amount for "The Blue Moon", because apparently there was a second 'Emma as a stripper' fic and I was accused of plagiarising, but this was later rescinded because the fics were totally different.

And also when someone decided to get really spiteful and tell me they lost all respect for me because I dared to find Emma sexy instead of fetishisizing Regina for all eternity.

OBVIOUSLY, the most intense hatred I got was for Paint It Black. The vilest, most bitter things were thrown at me. In the comments, in private messages. I got death threats. I had rape wished on me. I was told my kids should be taken away. I was accused of trying to lure in lesbians only to give them 'straight cock filled depravity".

Because there was a man in one sex scene. Meanwhile, it was never listed as a purely lesbian fic, and the two ladies have canonically HAD male romantic and sexual partners in the past. So... not sure what the huge vitriol was about.

I sure did learn to TAG PROPERLY after that, though. My god.

Get a grip, fandom, get a grip.

No other fandom has been that unhealthy. At least, not for me.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, I do. I have written both F/M and F/F. I have also written F/M/F, M/F/M, and F/F/F.

There's usually at least ONE woman involved. I have not, nor am I interested in writing M/M fics (boy parts iz icky).

Most readers find the scenes pretty hot. I tend to be descriptive and emotional when writing smut. Unless it's a PWP, there's usually a whole bunch of motivation and emotion involved. Even when it's a PWP there's usually a whole lot of characterisation in there.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I tend not to?

That said, I have written one.

It was a Heroes/Veronica Mars crossover, in which Sylar mistakes Veronica for his recently murdered (by his own hand, natch) girlfriend Elle and perhaps loses his very unstable mind over it a little. Leading to a slight case of kidnapping, Keith and Noah coupling up Buddy Cop style for some cross country chasing, super powered hijinx, and UBER ANGST. The tag line reads "What Happens when a Serial Killer and a Serial Victim Meet".

To be honest, it was kind of amazing and I loved it. It was working up to be Super Dubcon, but hadn't quite gotten there yet. I am sad that this remains a WIP. I would have loved to have finished this.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I've had some fics put on GoodReads, but they took them down when I asked them to.

I did have one of my fic scenes pretty much plagiarised in Firefly. What makes it worse is that they used it for a couple I hate. I let it go, though. That fic never quite got the same steam mine did. There was no point giving it attention.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of. I think it has been asked before, but I am a little wary of that sort of thing. I lose control of it if other people change it.

That said, I have had comments on my fics in a completely different language and I used Google Translate to both understand and reply. I will make the effort.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No.

I am jaded. I am very particular about my fics and, as said above, I do not like to lose control over them (what, control issues? Who? Me?)

I am also heavily jaded for things like fic swaps. It's my own fault, I realise this, because I would put so much effort and write thousands upon thousands of words of fic and get a 500 word piece back and it really put me off. Again, I know it's my fault, I chose to put that much effort in, but still.

Wait...I am having vague recollections of something like a fic round-robin? I could not tell you what fandom (I assume Firefly, but not sure), and certainly could never link back to it or even know how to google for it. I guess that counts? BUt I doubt it, because I can't even tell you what the fic was about or what my contribution to it was. So... no.

Hmmm, I was also involved in a Season Rewrite for Profiler back int he day, but all those fics are lost to the internet heyday and you'll never find them. Huh, I htink my episode was called "Lady In Red". (omg, THE MEMORIES).

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Geez. Asking the hard questions. I don't know. All my ships hold a place in my heart, that's why I write them. So, the answer is... I guess... if you've seen me write for that couple, then THAT couple is my favourite in that moment.

(I like, I have had a few fic requests that I've filled that haven't really been my cup of tea, Veronica/Lamb for instance, or Jayne/River, or Simon/River. I don't like them, but I have written them).

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

All of them. ALL OF THEM. I mean, "Adam's Rib" had so many stories to tell and I could have gotten lost in "The Best Deceptions" world. Omg, that was such a happy, schmoopy fic. Let me go back up to happy fics for a sec...

"... To Dream", "Bitter Revenge", and "Girl int he Mirror" will be my sadness from VM.

and ALL my SQ WIPs. "The New Moon", "A Swan Is A Beautiful Creature", "The Girl of My Dreams (Is Giving Me Nightmares)", "Subject 3662", "Blooding the Water". *sob*. I'm sorry!!!

16. What are your writing strengths?

Angst.

Detail.

Lots of people comment on my phrasing and pacing. The way I string words together and have breaks and just bring forth the imagery. It's never just "and then this happened and then this happened and he put his hand here and she put her mouth there".

No matter where I am planning to go with a fic, i always start from a canon point and keep that canon history. I try to keep characerisations believable. They may get into plots and situations that they would never in canon, but I like to hope I keep their reactions believable and true.

I like to delve into the emotion of it. You know the tumblr meme "Put that guy into situations". THAT'S what I do. And then I examine the ever living fuck out of it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I don't have a beta reader.

Which is troublesome, because my hands don't work properly anymore. At least, not as well as they used to. I have what's called dupuytren's contracture. It's a thickening fibrous band around the tendons of the hand. My hands aren't restricted, so much at the moment, but it does slow down my pinkie fingers. Which means when I touch type, there are so many mistakes. And I can't NOT touch type.

These come out mainly in things like double capitals (ever wonder why so many times in SVU fics I have the name "LIv" and not "Liv", it's because that capital 'i' is harder to spot. If I type "THe" I see it and fix it. But my eye seems to skip over the "LIv" and "HIs" words.

It also comes out in the spaces in the wrong place. I will type t he instead of 'the', or 'ith appened' instead of 'it happened'.

I spend A LOT OF TIME, going back and editing sentences I have just written. The amount of times I have had to go back and delete/edit words just in this post alone is staggering. It makes things take twice as long.

I have had to work really hard to get back into writing. I stopped for a great deal of time, many years, because I was so bothered by this.

Add to that, the kidney failure gives me brain fog, so I have to spend a lot of time trying to remember the specific words I want to use. For someone who uses words INSTRINSICALLY, knowing there is a specific word I want and not being able to access it in my memory? FUCKING FRUSTRATING, I Can tell you.

Another great weakness is starting a dozen fics at once and being unable to keep up and then being overwhelmed and losing momentum.

This is how I have so many WIPs.

I keep that in mind now, which is why I am limiting myself to two ongoing SVU fics and THAT IS IT. No more until they're finished.

THough I have actually been writing SO MUCH lately. At least once chapter a week. So this is good. Makes me happy.

I get the feeling that I tend to homogenise my characterisations a little. But this doesn't seem to be a complaint of any commenters, so I try not to let my imagination run wild with me.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I have done it.

Firefly fic, by necessity, uses a lot of Chinese. I used to know the html to do the hover type and would have Chinese dialogue with hover type translations. It was fun, because as is the Firefly traditions, you could have the filthiest things in Chinese and the censors wouldn't pick it up. (My favourite thing I wrote translated to... something like "Your mother sucks rotten beef sticks in hell" if I am remembering correctly).

Alas, I have forgotten the html for that. I am sure it's just a google away, but... I don't really need translations for English fics.

I also did a bunch of research for Trigidasleng. I never really wrote The 100 fics, though I did write some drabbles. I probably did more research that necessary for the mount of fic I actually wrote.

But, yeah, I think if the source material calls for it, you should definitely put the effort in.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Who wants a laugh? When I was in primary school, 3rd grade I think, we wrote books. We got to type them on a computer, the teacher printed them out, then bound them and we drew the pictures and coloured them in.

I still have mine.

It's called "Bugs Bunny, Brooke, and the Giant Banana", which was a combination of Bugs Bunny (natch), mary sue insert of my friend Brooke, and James and the GIant Peach.

BUAH HAH HAH.

But truly? My first fandom was Profiler. This is the show that got me ONTO the net, introduced me to fandoms and message boards and fics. If it weren't for those people, I wouldn't be here now.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Don't ask me to choose a favourite child!

Are you kidding me?

I cannot. I can't even do it per fandom. I love them all, which is why I wrote them.

How could you be so cruel?

Tagging: YOU, if you want to.

[hotmonkeelove]

Revisiting an Old Survey

While looking through some of my old stuff, I noticed the "100 Excellent Questions" I answered. I thought I'd do an updated version to see how much my views may or may not have changed in the past eight years...

100 Excellent Questions

Because I miss the old days of doing these on LJ. Bold and italicised means no change, strike-through is changed, just italicised means a further disclosure, just bold is the new answer.

1. If there were one word which was automatically to your name in Google searches, which word would you want it to be?

Huh?

2. What is a goal that you recently met?

I dressed up as Torgo.

I ordered a wig for my Anko cosplay.

3. What is your favorite time of day?

Night.

4. Name a celebrity you find attractive.

Other than Micky Dolenz? Richard Burton.

Seeing as I've fancied Burton since I was 7, this has not changed.

5. What is one of the best pieces of advice you have ever received?

Stop being sad and start getting mad.

My aunt said this to me as I was cutting ties with my abusive father. I was angry, but I was also in the midst of a nervous breakdown and eating disorder. My dad also had eating disorders, in addition to his chronic criticism of women any bit overweight. He did that to my mother throughout their marriage and had started in on me during puberty.

6. What is the ultimate gesture of total trust?

Bondage.

7. What is the best compliment you have ever received?

That I'm a brilliant writer.

8. What is something you have changed your mind about?

Putting up with someone hurting me just because I love them.

9. What is something you’ve never changed your mind about?

Koalas are cute.

10. Rewrite the end of a fairy tale.

Snow White rejects the Prince and stays with the dwarves.

I suspect there's a video of that already...

11. Choose one: you will never misunderstand the meaning of what someone else is saying OR nobody will ever misunderstand what you say.

The latter.

12. If offered irreversible immortality, would you take it?

No.

13. In your opinion, what are the most important qualities of a good friend?

Honesty, intelligence, common interests, empathy.

14. If you could be a founding member of a space colony, with the caveat that you would never be able to return to Earth, would you go?

No.

15. What is your favorite superpower? Why?

Teleportation, because I can't drive.

16. If you were a book, which book would you be?

The Bell Jar.

17. If you found out that your life was a book, and you met your author, what would you say to them?

What the fuck?!

18. How would you prefer to die?

Snakebite. Like Cleopatra did.

19. What is your favorite paradox?

I don't have one.

20. Tell us five facts about your first love, or, if you haven’t had one yet, invent the story of meeting your first love.

He had long, black hair, a big nose, bedroom eyes, he was a Libra, and he treated me like shit. What an asshole! But god, he was gorgeous! (We weren't a couple. I just stopped hiding my feelings after the person I confided in blabbed to him. This was in 7th grade, mind you.)

The only guy my age I crushed on. Though I did have a very serious boyfriend (the only man who really wanted to marry me) who was a year younger than me, back when I was 30. He was also gorgeous! Kind of like Noah Taylor, only Peter Lorre's height. He was even more messed up than me and was off/on with my girlfriend, so I had to let go. And I know I can't just be friends with him. We had twice gone years without speaking, and each time he came back, so did my feelings. He's still the greatest male love of my life. Him being in Australia and me being here didn't help matters, either. God, I miss him. Hopefully, things are better for him now.

21. If you could live anywhere for a year, where would you live?

Wales.

22. If you could visit anywhere for a week, where would you go?

Barcelona. Enough time to see all of Antoni Gaudí's architectural masterpieces! The most beautiful buildings in the world!

23. You can only read one genre of books for the rest of your life. Which genre do you read?

History.

Or mythology. Or art. Luckily, this is only a silly hypothetical.

24. Define “love.”

Needing something or someone in order to be complete as a person.

And the need to fulfill this in another.

25. Define “justice.”

Ma'at.

26. Define “truth.”

What is, rather than what should be.

27. Define “art.”

Magick in a physical form.

28. Define “good.”

Severus Snape.

29. Define “obscene.”

James Franco. GOD, I HATE HIM!

I don't see him in things as much now, and I like it that way. That smug look on his face drives me up the wall.

30. What one thing in the world would be hardest for you to give up?

Diet Coke.

31. What is one thing you regret?

Nothing.

Everything I've done was a learning experience.

32. What is something that you have done that you are proud of?

Left my moronic ex.

Not my Aussie boyfriend. This was the controlling, emotionally abusive jerk whose trophy girlfriend I was, till my girlfriend came along and helped me to finally walk away. I don't regret the years with him, though. It was my only escape from an impoverished, dysfunctional family, and it allowed me to save up the money that I needed to start my new life here.

33. Is it easier to talk or to listen?

Listen.

34. When are you vulnerable?

Always.

35. If you met God, what would you say to God?

Nice to meet you, Tim Curry.

I met him, but sadly there wasn't enough time to talk.

36. Would it be harder to tell someone you loved them if you weren’t sure how they would respond, or have to tell someone that you didn’t love them back?

The latter.

I know from experience.

37. Excluding romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them? Who were they to you?

My mom on the phone after Christmas.

A few weeks ago.

38. What is your worst quality?

My temper.

But it's not nearly as short as it was in my youth.

39. What is your best quality?

My sincerity.

40. What is your most immediately noticeable quality?

My breasts. Hard to miss them. Even now.

41. What is the first thing you notice about other people?

Their eyes.

42. Describe one of your closest friends, and explain why that person is such a close friend.

My sister, because we just get on so well together and have so much fun with all our projects and opinions.

My sister and I fad a falling out, but are now on good terms again. I'd like to mention my bff, Natale. She's smart, talented, has a good heart, has been through a lot of the same things as I have, and has persevered. Plus, she's my Orochimaru. And she is so good at writing him!

43. What happened in the last dream you remember?

Something about the Monkees and I think it was Hallowe'en. The rest is a blur.

I was hanging out with Barry Gibb and he was so cool and fun!

44. What was your most memorable dream?

I dreamed I was the Elephant Man, wearing the robes and hood. Someone pulled off the hat and hood, but I looked like me.

45. Two truths and a lie.

The sky is blue. The earth is round. Gryffindor is a worthwhile House.

46. If you were having a baby with the love of your life, and they insisted that the child be named after a place, what would you name your child?

Babylon.

47. What is the last lie you told?

Not so much a lie as staying silent while someone said they watched Bill O'Reilly. Idiot.

Referring to my girlfriend as my roommate to a stranger? I'm not big on lying.

48. Is it possible for you to love someone you don’t trust?

Yes.

It's not a good thing, but it is possible.

49. What motivates you most?

Ambition.

50. What is your favorite narrative trope?

I guess the villain who turns out to be kind of good.

51. Describe the ultimate dystopia.

A world without the Monkees and Rocky Horror.

52. What story (book, movie, game, etc.) have you learned the most from?

Secretary.

53. What is something you wish other people could know about you without you having to tell them?

That I'm too shy to talk to people on my own.

I can in a professional manner, but approaching people as friends terrifies me. At least face to face. I can write to them just fine. Keep in mind I have a soft, high voice, a lisp, and dyslexia, in addition to social anxiety. Unless I'm in the spotlight/ playing a role. The pressure then disappears. Or in a very small group or one-on-one. Or even voice chat. The more intimate it is, the more I can open up. Hell, I let the floodgates open when I do have a friend or lover.

54. Describe a moment you experienced something unexpectedly beautiful.

Seeing this painting of Sappho in the Norton Simon Museum. It was so vivid, it floored me. I was having an episode of Stendhal syndrome.

55. What is the biggest challenge you face when trying to form relationships with people?

Talking to them.

56. How close do you think your perception of yourself is to how other people perceive you?

When I hate myself, probably close.

Depends on the people. Of course, with my disabilities, I don't get out much to interact with people nowadays. God, I need that nerve ablation. I miss being able to walk without a cane for more than 15 minutes. Or an hour, tops, with one.

57. What is something you used to be afraid of, but aren’t anymore?

Letting people hear my voice.

I'm still insecure about it, though.

58. What is the most important emotion?

Determination.

Love. Which was second choice back then.

59. Do you think humans are any different than very advanced organic robots? If so, how?

Yes, we have souls.

60. If you had to move somewhere else, what would you miss most from where you are now?

The foreign food. You can't get Greek, Thai, Indian, etc. in rural Texas, where I lived before we moved the Metroplex.

61. If you were a videogame character, what would your iconic weapon be?

Kunai, I suppose.

62. What is an aspect of your personality now that would come as a surprise to your younger self?

That I no longer feel guilty about being in love with more than one person at a time.

Also, the need to be jealous of others. Jealousy is a waste of time and energy.

63. If you could eliminate one event from the last month, which event would it be?

Getting this fever blister!

My dog trying to eat something very gross off the ground. I almost threw up.

64. If you had to forget the entire last year except for one 24 hour period, which day would you chose to remember? (Other people would remember, and you would have anything you wrote down or recorded during that time period - you would just have a form of amnesia.)

The night I went to see Suspiria at the Texas Theater.

The day we adopted Buddy.

65. What is the most upsetting thing anyone has ever said to you?

"Go kill yourself."

66. If you had to pick only one ideal or cause to work toward, what would it be?

My True Will.

67. Are there any unforgivable actions? What are they?

Cruelty to animals, because animals can't plead for their lives.

68. Under what circumstances is keeping information secret acceptable or morally required?

To save lives and giving presents.

69. What is one of your favorite ways to relax?

Stretching out and watching the Monkees.

70. What is something you find difficult to talk about, even though you know you should?

That I want sex.

That I need a nap.

71. What is an easy, default topic of conversation?

Monty Python.

72. What is your favorite sort of conversation?

An intellectual one.

73. What is a version of you in an alternate reality doing right now?

Micky Dolenz.

74. What was the last adorable thing you saw?

My dogs.

My dog.

75. Would you prefer for people to hate you or for people to be completely indifferent to you?

Hate me.

Because at least I'll know why they're not there.

76. Would you prefer to be yelled at or ignored?

Ignored.

77. What is your favorite word and why?

Yasashiku. It means 'gently' in Japanese. It's very poetic.

78. What is your dream job?

Famous poet and burlesque girl.

79. What is the most difficult thing you’ve done this month?

Trying to beat this writer's block.

Starting a new patio garden.

80. When was the last time you were really scared?

When some drunk was banging on my door in the middle of the night and wouldn't stop for over an hour.

When my sister went in for surgery. She had stage 2 breast cancer.

81. What do you want most?

Success.

82. Describe an ideal day.

I do a lot of writing, watch some favourite programmes or films, go out to eat, have an interesting conversation with someone, and get some cuddle time.

An orgasm would be nice, too.

83. If you could speak to any real (non-fictional) person, living or dead for one hour, who would it be?

Aleister Crowley.

84. In general, are you happy with the person you have become?

Yes.

85. Do you want to be a parent?

Hell no.

I'll stick will dogs, thank you very much.

86. What is something unusual about you that not a lot of people know?

I've only had two or three vaginal orgasms in my entire life. And they all involved kinky sex (spankings, humiliation, etc).

87. What makes you you?

Hmm, my DNA?

88. Are you lonelier when you’re with people or when you’re alone?

With people.

89. What makes you feel safe?

Cuddling.

90. What was the last bad decision you made?

To eat all that tiramisu.

Reading someone else's opinion of Saionji. No, he's not some shallow ego-maniac! He puts up a nasty front to hide how terribly insecure and depressed he is. He did care for Wakaba! Mikage explained that extracting the crystallised copies of the Student Council members' dueling swords required "people who have a hold on their hearts." So how could Wakaba manage to take his sword if she wasn't dear to him? And then there's the fact Saionji uses the money she gives him to eat lunch with on a kit to hand-make a gift for her; a barrette of a leaf, the meaning of her name. I'm not saying Saionji's innocent. He's deeply flawed, like all the major characters, including Wakaba. It's that he's broken-hearted, not heartless. And Wakaba is the only person who genuinely cares for him.

91. Who is someone you have utmost respect for, and what is it about that person that makes you esteem them so highly?

Joseph Campbell, because he was so right about everything.

He wasn't infallible, but his work has helped me so much in understanding life and the Divine. I am a Joseph Campbell fangirl!

92. What was the last thing you laughed uncontrollably at?

Mystery Science Theater 3000.

The Cinema Snob's review of that xxx Mortal Kombat spoof. Oh my god, the running gag of Shao Kahn snoring in the background!

93. Your friend tells you that they are suicidal, and asks you not to tell anyone. Is it more of a betrayal to tell someone, or to keep silent?

To keep silent.

94. What song speaks to you most? Why?

Sarah Brightman's 'Once in a Lifetime.' It's so submissive! "Show me the floor; Lay down the law; I need to taste you more." I couldn't put it better, myself!

95. What basic values or principles do you turn to when faced with moral dilemmas?

The Laws of Thelema.

96. If you had a tagline, what would it be?

You're saying, 'Whore of Babylon,' like it's a bad thing.

97. If applicable, what do you look for in a romantic partner?

Intelligence, shared opinions and interests, honesty, mesmerizing eyes, skill with a riding crop.

Or they should at least be good at spanking!

98. Who is your favorite author?

Sylvia Plath.

99. Who is the one person you know who is most similar to you (in terms of personality, beliefs, attitudes, mannerisms, etc)?

My girlfriend.

Second would be my bff/ OroAnko rp partner. Ever since we patched up our friendship, I've had a new lease on life.

100. What are you most excited about right now?

The prospect of seeing the Monkees perform again next year.

I did see Micky and Peter on the 50th anniversary tour! Now it's my current creative burst. I've got fanfics, three novels, and a final edit of my poetry book on my plate. I swear I will stop putting the poetry book off!

[kittenshift-17]

Hi! I've really been craving some snamione fics, and your writing has made me picky 😬 do you have any fic recs or authors you go to when you're wanting something good? (the spicier the better)

Girl, you came to the right place. My Snamione loving heart is all aflutter. MY TIME HAS COME!! 

*scampers off to fetch list to all her fave Snamiones in no particular order*

Self Slain Gods on Strange Altars by scumblackentropy What do you want me to say, Granger? That you are mine and I am yours? You are. I am. Let's not fuck around.

Pet Project by Caeria Hermione overhears something she shouldn't concerning Professor Snape and decides that maybe the House-elves aren't the only ones in need of protection.

FALLING FURTHER IN by kaz2 Hermione begins to learn something of the man behind the dark sarcasms of the classroom.

Chasing The Sun by Loten AU, from Order of the Phoenix onwards. Hermione only wanted to learn Healing; she discovers that Professor Snape is a human being after all, and his actions dramatically shape the course of the war as events unfold. Complete.

Pride of Time by Anubis Ankh Hermione quite literally crashes her way back through time by roughly twenty years. There is no going back; the only way is to go forward. And when one unwittingly interferes with time, what one expects may not be what time finds...

Inkspots by mezzosangue When you are a double spy with two masters, no one is a friend. But the war ended last May, and Severus is now his own man. An owl brings a letter of change, but is it a good change? Canon Compliant, disregards Epilogue. Eventual SS/HG romance.

Splintered and Broken by A plus He had watched as the thin wood snapped across her knee with a violence he had not known she possessed. He had been her teacher for seven years and had never seen this girl give up at anything. Voldemort wins, Hermione leaves, Severus waits.

The Tattered Man by Aurette I was once asked to write a Marriage Law Challenge fic by someone who loves a sad tale. This short story is it. Angst, Character Death. Tissues recommended. COMPLETE

Saving your life by lilmisblack  When Hermione is captured by Death Eaters, Severus knows there's only one way to save her. 'What are you doing? ' she asked, her voice shaky. 'Saving your life,' he said, just as he started kissing her neck.

A Murder of Crows by Hogwarts 91 14 yrs post-war: Hermione’s teaching at Hogwarts when an un-aged Snape awakens from stasis and returns to the school. Sparks fly when they meet. Can they learn to trust and love in time to defeat an evil plot bent on changing the wizarding world forever?

Advanced Floriography by Viridiantly Snape's first question to Harry about wormwood and asphodel in the Language of Flowers means 'I bitterly regret Lily's death'. Harry never gets the message behind the question, but what if Hermione does, years later? Mostly set in HBP, DH and after. A story of messages with flowers, the wizarding war, and different kinds of love. Slow-burn. Not canon-compliant, but canon-inspired.

Looking for Magic by Hypnobarb Severus Snape and Hermione Granger deal with traumas past and present and find they have more in common than they realize as they prepare for the ultimate confrontation with Voldemort. SSHG pairing. Not HBP compliant. This is a novel length story.

Synergy by Laurielove Hermione is being followed, and she suspects she knows by whom. But when they come face-to-face, how will she react to him and his startling request? SS/HG. M readers only, please. Written for the 2011 LJ SS/HG Exchange.

Post Tenebras, Lux by Loten "After Darkness, Light." A chance meeting ten years after the war may not be just a coincidence, and may prove to have very far-reaching consequences. A story of many things, but primarily of healing. SS/HG; rated M for later chapters. Complete.

For the Potions Master's Amusement by snape.submiss Now Complete! Severus Snape is not a kind man, but Hermione Granger is past caring. She wants his approval and will do anything to get it. How far will she go? Even she has no concept of the depths to which she will fall in her quest.

Latent Loveliness by Ladyreason Bellatrix gets in one last curse before her defeat which causes Hermione to fall into a deep sleep... She'll only awaken to one man's kiss. And boy, will she awaken. eventual SSHG pairing

Babble On by Aurette One person's nervous tic, is another's nervous joy.

Liminal by Cybrokat Severus Snape keeps running into a student playing piano. Why does he stop to listen, and how does she respond when she is asked to invite him when she plays? And what about Voldemort? Here there be fluff, romance, drama, and angst.

Sins of the Father by Emmaficready 9 Months after the end of the war, a destitute Severus Snape, practically living rough, gets news that will change his life forever. Severus Snape Lives! / POST DH / EWE WARNINGS: Abuse, Neglect, Character Death, Rape, Sensitive/taboo topics.

The Marriage Law by teshara 020 rewrite and update! When Hermione Granger and Severus Snape are thrown together by the ill-conceived Marriage Law, no one doubts they'll make a good undercover team for the Order. No one suspects that they'll find mutual respect, love, and a plot to destroy the world. A story in 3 parts.

A wizard s trial by snapeophil Hermione is out after curfew when she witnesses something that will change her relationship to her DADA professor forever.

The Prisoner and the Occlumens by duskywolfdaemon Hermione's plans to spend her seventh year on the run with her friends are shattered when Severus Snape shows up with a proposal she cannot refuse. *AU 7th year with Hermione attending Hogwarts. Eventual SSHG. M for reasons. ***COMPLETE***

Unintentional Inveiglement by onecelestialbeing Takes places during the summer after OoTP, the Golden Trio is forced to stay in hiding at Grimmauld Place. Hermione (who is of age!) begins gravitating towards Snape without knowing why, and he attempts keeping her at arms length, but will be able to remain doing so? AU

Innocent Shadows by IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse "You'll sort everything. Gods, Hermione, you fought five Death Eaters to a standstill *and* defended and saved Snape."/ "Professor Snape."/ Harry rolled his eyes. "Yes. That." He waved his hand at the bed. "So this? Piece of cake." /Marriage Law /ss/hg HEA...always *grin*

Turned Over by IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse Severus Snape inherited Hermione Granger at three o'clock on a rain-soaked Saturday morning in March. SS/HG HEA...Always :) COMPLETE

The Irony by awakethelion Hermione Granger gets stuck in her Animagus form and is put in the care of the only one strong enough to control her - Severus Snape. The over-achieving know-it-all Gryffindor, is, in the eyes of Hogwarts student body, home taking care of her ill parents, while in reality she is now living life posing as Professor Snape's familiar. J.K. Rowling owns all the characters.

Camerado by MillieJoan Hermione seeks knowledge from a reluctant Snape in order to help the War effort. What she receives is more than either of them expected. Set beginning in Hermione's sixth year, continuing into a slightly AU post-DH era.

Unto Their Own by CRMediaGal The Light has fallen, Darkness abounds, and Hermione Granger is struggling to survive in a far more sinister Wizarding world. When she is sentenced into Snape's charge, Hermione begins to wonder if everything is truly as it seems. For better or worse, their worlds are about to collide, perhaps even unite them against a common enemy. AU, Post-Hogwarts, Rated M.

Vixen by SLovingLecter After her parent's deaths Hermione is bound and trapped in her Animagus form, first for her own safety, then to ensure the safety of others during the war. Who is she bound to? Severus Snape, of course.

Another Dream by dragoon811 Due to his injuries, Severus is unable to resume his old life. He's determined to be lonely and miserable, but the yearly Order Christmas party becomes a bright spot, thanks to Hermione Granger. Complete. 

The Prisoner and the Occlumens by duskywolfdaemon Hermione's plans to spend her seventh year on the run with her friends are shattered when Severus Snape shows up with a proposal she cannot refuse. *AU 7th year with Hermione attending Hogwarts. Eventual SSHG. M for reasons. ***COMPLETE***

Entangled by IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse No doubt, she'd been showing off obscure spells she found in the archives, again. Apparently, she did that whilst drunk. Hermione never yet had any memory of it. / SS/HG HEA...Always :)

Time Immemorial by FawkesyLady Hermione loses it after the Battle of Hogwarts. Unfortunately, she still had that time turner and she uses it, sending her back in time, a mystery for the denizens of Hogwarts, circa 1976. OC's are important. Please note, chapters 21-26 could be considered crossovers with JRR Tolkien's Return of the King. In for long haul, y'all. Nominee for Marauder's Medal 2018, Best WIP.

The Offer of Just One More by IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse The feeling in her chest twisted. Tightened. Ronald Weasley didn't want children. SS/HG HEA...Always :) This one's a slow burn.

Time's Hammer by IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse She was about to break the time stream. Not just break it, but take a bloody hammer to it. SS/HG HEA...Always :)

Clash of the Conjurers by llorolalluvia In a world where the mere flap of a butterfly's wing can cause a hurricane on the other side of the globe, can one simple glance save a man's life? When Hermione and her professor are forced together against their will, can they overcome their differences, find order amidst the chaos, and save the Wizarding World? not Cannon compliant. Rated M for sexuality and violence. DUBCON!

Turned Over by IShouldBeWritingSomethingElse Severus Snape inherited Hermione Granger at three o'clock on a rain-soaked Saturday morning in March. SS/HG HEA...Always :) COMPLETE

One Step Forward, Two Decades Back by corvusdraconis AU/AO: [HG/SS] What-if Story. Hermione Granger gets erased due to a badly phrased, vague, and bitter wish. She is Hermione Granger no more. Now, thanks to Ron, she is Hermione Ankaa Black, sister of Sirius & Regulus Black, & member of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black. Now what is she going to do? Multiple pairings in later chapters, and JP starts out as a rampaging jerk.

Absinthe by Aurette A dark deed on a dark night sends two lives spinning out of control. To forge a future, both must confront their pasts. AU, EWE, SS/HG, HEA

The Love You Take by Subversa Hermione is cursed by the Death Eaters, and Dumbledore believes Professor Snape is the only one who can help her and keep her safe. Hermione is 18 years old in this story, but she is still a student.   

[smutty-ki113r]

I woke up to my alarm tellin me to get out of bed and so naturally I checked your tumblr and I'm,,, concerned

There's a small anon war over what hoodie smells like and I have no sense of smell whatsoever so I'm not contributin, but, leafs.

Petition to change the plural of leaf to leafs instead of leaves. Leaves is an ugly ass word. Leafs just rolls of the tongue, its nicer, its what the people want

Also the same with sheep like what, why is the plural the same, I refer to them as sheeps cuz it makes me happy

Also I don't like the y/n either because "y/n" is usually a whole ass person all in itself. And they're usually a girl in most fanfic, along with the fact that they are the Mariest Sue That Ever Mary Sue'd.

I've been considerin why LJ is my favourite and I think it's purely because if any of the more sane (Masky, Toby, Slenderman, etc) took one fuckin GLANCE they would run away. I have hope that clown boy is too far gone to care about my mental state too much.

If you squint real hard my braincell count looks like a normal amount

I'm so exhausted I'm gonna talk to you, my favourite online human, because the blue light from my phone keeps me awake.

But I think my favourite dynamic ever is Rivals to Lovers™. Not enemies to lovers, cuz enemies have two different goals in mind; whereas rivals compete for the same thing.

I'm a sucker for medieval shit so,, a scene that's been annoying me all day is~

you're invited to a Royal Ball (because isn't that how all romances start these days, just roll with it brother) and you go, finding out it's a masquerade ball. You get there, you dance, being passed from person to person in a never ending loop of jewel-embeded skirts that were swept across the marble floor of the (obscenely) bedazzled castle, and suits that seemed more expensive than you were.

Regret never came because the wine chased it away; it flowed in waterfalls into your glass, the scent of it filling the room but not enough to drown out the everlasting smell of expensive perfume. Sometimes the odor of it clung to the women of the ball tighter than their corsets. The massive drapes were pulled back, latching to the wall in attempt to keep them from falling and blocking the view–of which captured your gaze immediately. The doors were swung open to let the air in, and ensuring that no glass got in the way of what lay beyond; the moon, full and impossibly heavy hung, stranded in the crisp night air. The moon was the only one that didn't judge the events that took place in the ballroom that night, the only thing watching the crowd of people with a pure, impassive gaze.

Because later that night, after multiple drinks had been passed around and a cacophony of laughter, dancing, and food had been consumed–after many glasses of wine had passed your lips and your body– of which was feeling tingly and impishly confident–had wandered to a far corner, darkened by the domed ceiling, seemingly on its own accord. In that moment you would give everything to stay in the Palace, to twirl until your feet blistered and you withered away into old gnarled bones and ashes that could still dance with the wind.

"I do hope that you know well what you wish for; not for clarity of the concept, my dear, but for clarity of consequence." The voice that spoke in your ear was deep, low, and held even darker undertones. It siezed your attention and captured it in both hands, strangling the curiosity out of you. It had come from your right, even further into the pitch-black corner, but as soon as you moved all the thoughts in your head sloshed about, banging against the interior of your head. It was either equivelant to that or a sledge hammer, one of the two. The wine was probably just twisting the voice's around you, making them appear. You tried to convince yourself but alas, even you deemed it vastly unlikely.

Turning around was more difficult then you planned. Just when you thought you would see the owner of the voice, nobody was there. Yep, probably just the abundance of alcohol making you dizzy.

Shifting back to dancing wasn't hard; it was as if you were floating down along a stream, merely following wherever the river took you. Voices pressed against you on all sides, soon becoming a background noise too, a faint buzzing sound. It rose and fell like the waves, ever-changing in volume.

You started to lose a grip on reality; eyes fluttering closed as you danced, just taking a breath of air, letting the delicate night wash away your worries, who you wer–

What the fuck!?

You did a double take, eyes now wide fucking open, because outside you spied someone that had to be atleast a foot taller than anyone else in the ball. The darkness seemed to congregate behind it, flourishing, and the only thing you could see was a wide smile and a pair of eyes.

It seemed that you couldn't get enough air into your lungs, couldn't focus; the voice's that used to be hazy surround sound was now piercingly loud the people were just too much, everywhere at once. Your breathing only picked up even more as you gripped your chest.

The.. Demon had disappeared by the time you glanced upward, you you scurried outside, barely making it before you collapsed on a golden railing. There were fine drops of rain scattered about, eluding to the fact it had rained earlier. Your masquerade costume was getting wet, leaning against the railing, but you were so dizzy you didn't care.

It was the wine, it had to be. Nobody could be that tall, it–it was humanly impossible. Moving was now akin to attempting to romp through thick syrup; a stagnant pace, uncoordinated, unsteady. Then it stopped. There was a hand on your shoulder.

You skimmed the person; they had a dark blue suit that sparkled with the occasional gold highlights, with a blue mask covering their face–it seemed that it covered all of their face, and didn't quite match what a masquarade mask should look like, but you didn't care. The support was welcomed.

"You seemed as if you required help, my Lady," He said, his voice deep and low, so much so that you questioned if you would even be able to hear him over the music blaring in the ballroom if the two of you were to venture back inside.

You looked back to where you saw the tall being, with its eyes and smile that seemed wrong, and wrong in a terrible, dangerous way.

"Care to dance with me?" You asked, relieved when he slipped his arm with yours and led you inside. The music had slowed to a waltz, nothing like the big parade of dancers that came in flurries of colour and left just as fast. His arms were solid and a comfort, welcome as the breeze on a sunny day. It felt like he protected you from everything that might have caught you off guard, in a way. Plus, he kept you from falling flat on my face, which is always a good thing.

The song changed and you were about to ask him for something else; his name, maybe, but fate had other plans. Both of you were bumped and somebody else had picked you up in their arms, hands landing on your waist as the dance consumed you. Your mystery man in blue was gone, it seemed, and you sighed. Being safe was a hard thing to ask. Instead, above you now was a man dressed in dark browns and yellows– he had a rather strange mask that curled around his mouth and eyes, leaving the centre free. His brown locks looked ruffled and messy and he jerked every once in a while, moving sporadically. It didn't stop and he didn't seem to be able to control it so you didn't mind. The slight jolts emitting from him caused you to wake up more, which was always welcome.

"Are you okay?" You asked, after his gaze had wandered elsewhere. It came back to you in a heartbeat, and you sensed be was smiling under the mask.

He twirled you, spinning you gracefully. "Of course I am," he said, coming in close again. "For now, I'm winning."

The night surged on quickly and you found yourself caught between multiple strangle figures; a woman with silky black hair and a mask that made her eyes appear the same colour, that offered you a drink that wasn't wine. A man that had offered you wine, that stood next to the big buffet table with a full glass and a white mask. He had stood with a black-masked man, but he weaved through the crowd until he was another string in a pile of wool. Your blue mystery man made another appearance, but not with you–he was talking in low tones with another man (you didn't mind that they were mostly men; seemingly just because it never occurred to you that they might be connected) who had black hair, like the other woman, and pale white skin. The palest you'd seen in a long time. However, at that moment, he had looked up and seen you staring, only for you to catch scars at the ends of his mouth. You crossed it down to makeup or a deformity of some kind. Through all this, you were atleast grateful you didn't see the tall being again.

And everything carried on. Until it didn't. Blood stained the carpet black and the screams were too loud to ever fade away, seeming to shake the walls. You had tried to run from it, from them, but you tripled in a hallway and couldn't even get up because of your many glasses of alcohol. Struggling was futile and someone easily pulled you back.

With horror you realised it was one of the men from before; you recognised the scruffy brown hair and occasional movements. He held you there, between life and death a moment more, a moment where all the men you'd seen that night, and the woman, came around the corner. Their voices were distorted to your damaged ears but your eyes focused on the tall being; he was real, and black and white, with hands that weren't normal and a nose that was even less so. They're all abnormal, your consciousness whispered to you, and you believed it. The man on top of you grinned, happy that he had caught you. Your stomach turned.

"Bring them to the Mansion," a voice ring out in your head. Your 'companions' seemed to hear it too. "And bring them alive."

As you can see I've never written anythin in my life so this is shit lmfao but I don't care an im just here to brainstorm anyways

Have my little scene, take it, because it was fun to do. It's not spellchecked, I've not read through it, because I can't be bothered, so if anythin is wrong laugh and move on brother. Also tryin to write without cuttin off the g from my words and shortenin them was so hard so halfway through I didn't bother lmao

I think this is my longest message yet so, sorry about that Red

Cheers if you actually made it this far.

–Kieran.

I agree. Leafs is better. SHEEPS- thats the cutest thing I’ve ever heard and I love it.

Y/n is a stereotype in itself so I agree, it’s usually ya know, the whole “im different” kind of chick who can do everything and anything (basically bella from twilight), when in reality the reader is human and humans have imperfections. Lots of ‘m …LJ is my fav for a lot of reasons, at this point he’s a comfort to me. Plus, I (oml) relate to him so much, and I can do a post about this- if someone cares or asks. And I have similar traumaaa

Oh geez, I’m your favorite online human, AGH my heart, again, its burning. I agree, RIVALS TO LOVERS SOUNDS SO SOSOSOOSO GOOD I LOVE IT. (I would say my fav trope is “lovers who ache to be together but due to circumstance one starts to lose feeling for the other and it’s an agonizing pain to the other” or maybe that’s just me because I find completion in sadness, which is horrific. But I really itch to angst.)

Here’s me reading your scene and also talking about it at the same time. ‘Regret never came because the wine chased it away’…that’s a good line, thats a good line. The way you just take one thing and mash it with another aspect like wow. Like as each idea were droplets of water on a leafs and you happen to tilt it, connecting them so effortlessly. I’m jealous. The descriptions are amazing, and how you make it the reader’s thought process-damn. I WANNA WRITE THIS GOOD, YALL OUTSHINE ME. And then you say this was shit. *slaps you* DONT YOU DARE UNDESESTIMATE YOURSELF MISTER

Also the way you just subconsciously cut off the g’s is spectacular. I try to, but it’s hard for me. SORRY? SORRY?! Nononono thank you, because the longer the message the better. Apart from the fact that long messages make me happy, especially from you, it means you put time into talking to me! Which makes me super happy too. Heheheh. Thank you love! This made my morning, along with that drawing submission from cam anon, you should check it out! It’s really good.

[morethanonepage]

1, 2, and 11 for the ask game! I'm super curious! :D

1. what's the fic youre most proud of?

talked about here, but i'm also going to put in a good word for a strong enough foundation, because it was gen so i knew it wasn't going to get as much readership, but i still wrote/finished it and still let myself get WAY more personal/self-inserty than i usually do when writing fic. like i'm usually way more subtle about kining w characters but here it was way more obvious (perhaps only to me until i told everyone about it LOL).

2. what's a fic that took you to an emotional/dark/hard place?

oh man a real blast from the past from my Les Mis days, The Weight of Us. Which was for a fic exchange:

So basically, some dubious consent between Madeleine and Javert, even to the bordering of non con. (Depending on how far the filler wants to take this.)However, the catch is this. Throughout the whole thing, Madeleine is being really soothing, really “kind” and supportive, but firmly, firmly insistent. He continues to do this until Javert is overwhelmed and weepy, and Madeleine remains hushy and comforting. Because Creepy!Comforting!Madeleine everyone. Rating can be anything, and the content doesn’t necessarily have to be sexual. Just Madeleine as a charitable and yet deeply manipulative coercer.

because i made the PHENOMENALLY dumb decision to write it from valjean's POV, meaning, i was writing dub/non-con from the point of view of the person -- doing it.

i think it's a good fic. i think the writing is also pretty high quality (i got some really nice comments about it, even specifically from the original prompter. if you go and read the comments you'll see my embarrassing flailing about it). but yeesh. i still don't know how i did it -- i think a part of me was responding to the -- actual inherent ugliness of valvert a ship? like no doubt i DO ship it, still, and it's an interesting dynamic for me, still, and in their old age (in the post-seine everybody lives version) i think javert and valjean COULD be good for each other, COULD save each other, etc, etc, etc.

but the fact remains that javert represents (CANONICALLY) the institutional injustice and oppression that straight up ruins valjean's life. like it's at least somewhat clear (in the book/better adaptations) that he isn't sadistic, but he also just does not care about hurting other people if he thinks they're guilty.

so yeah. it's troubling to me, on some level. and for valjean to forgive him is also, on some level, rankles me. like it's a theme of the book that valjean IS a good person, that by the end on some level he has come to understand at least sort of why javert is the way he is and doesn't hate him for it but on the other hand like. maybe he should??

idk. it's the kind of tension that i find appealing in a ship, while fully understanding why other people wouldn't like it. (tho most people who don't like valvert just uh. don't care about the old mens fucking when there are cute interchangeable revolutionaries to throw together).

but anyway. i justified the POV and the actions and the whole thing of that fic also on the level of, the book is ALSO fairly clear that m-sur-m valjean ISN'T the best version of himself yet -- it's not until he sacrifices his life to make sure an innocent man goes free AND saves Cossette that he's fully formed as Basically A Saint. so that was a timeframe where he could be a little bit more of a jerk, a little more angry at javert, a lot more willing to mess with him.

i still didn't feel great about it tho.

11. Has a fic you’ve written ever caused issues/controversy?

i mean not CONTROVERSY (that i know of lol) but i have, like most fic writers who have been doing this since the LJ days or before (i was never on fanfic dot net but one hears things), gotten my share of comments i found upsetting, ranging from complaints about:

this ship isn't canon, why are you writing it???*

this situation is an alternate universe, WHAT is the point of that????*

why are you glorifying the US military, it's BAD**

the ending to this fic is unearned, Character A is TOO MEAN to Character B, they shouldn't've ended up together***

the ending to this fic is unearned, Character B is TOO MEAN to Character A and never apologizes, they shouldn't've ended up together***

*these were both going back to my Heroes writing days. so that was the first fandom i wrote for! what fun new things i learned about putting your very personal writing out into the internet to be judged. has this stopped me from judging other people's very personal writing? absolutely not but then again i don't leave mean comments about it. on the fics themselves anyway.

**i will give the commenter the US military one BUT i will also say i was writing characters who, i believe, in that situation, would see at least some of what the military did/offered to be good thing. so. that doesn't mean it's my opinion but it's an opinion held by a lot of people and depiction doesn't equal endorsement etc etc.

***obviously these were on the same story lmfaoooo. so i actually found that comforting, bc they like -- cancelled each other out, in my mind.

[beebubb]

Mending the friendship (LJ and isaac)

(This is a part 2 so if you guys haven't read the first part, where i explain how they reunited again)

When isaac and will would go out and spend time together, LJ would often stalk them from afar

Isaac kept his promise about not trying to convince will to harm LJ

It was kind of bittersweet for LJ to see them together

He wanted to feel happy for will sense he could actually be with someone from his family that was actually a killer and inspire him even more to be a killer himself

But he was also scared. Scared that will would like isaac more and would eventually move in with him

He couldn't stand the idea of seeing the boy he raised be taken away from him

Will didn't think of leaving though

He wanted to spend time with his grandfather but he wasn't going to leave his bestfriend

Will would also tell isaac to not call LJ an imaginary friend and would tell isaac stories of all the things that he did together with LJ

Which just made isaac realise that LJ isn't just a murderous "imaginary" clown

At first he would feel pissed but slowly his grudge against LJ started to soften up

As time went by, will slowly started trying to get LJ and isaac to talk or be friends again

It was a bit unsuccessful at first but will didn't give up

The two of them would go places together with will but wouldn't talk much

They would drop him off to school/institution, get food, etc

They had their first conversation while they were waiting for will to come out of the institution

Isaac: thank you for raising him

LJ: ! Huh?

Isaac: thank you for raising william to be the man he is today.

LJ: oh um....i mean, he was assigned to me by the rulers of hell so, i kinda had to

Issac: yes but, you could have still killed him if you wanted to. You obviously hated me and i hated you, so you could have easily killed him

LJ: it's hard to hate him.....he's been with me sense he was born and....i tried to push him away by trying to scare him but, he always stuck to me...

Isaac: *chuckles* brave kid

LJ: so sense then, we've been together and he never forgot or aban-...nevermind

Isaac: he never abandoned you like i did?

LJ: ! No! That's not what i meant to say!

Isaac: heh, it's fine, you're right to think that

LJ was actually surprised that he wasn't getting pissed off like usual so he decided to finally settle things

LJ: ....did you...actually forget about me?

Isaac: ...*sighs* no.....

LJ: ....then...then why did you leave me in that box?!?! I waited 13 years to see you again! I saw when you came back and i thought i would finally be free but you never let me out!

Isaac: i was only thinking about myself....i thought you wouldn't care if i left you there so..i did..

LJ wanted to cry but he didn't

Like, what did he mean that he thought he "wouldn't care" LJ was literally created for him, why wouldn't he care?

He wanted to cry because of sadness but also anger. But kept it in and just tried to remain calm

Issac: i was angry that you killed me in the most brutal way but, honestly, i don't blame you, not like i taught you or showed any better

LJ stayed quiet and let isaac explain himself

Isaac: and i admit, that i was ungreatful for everything you did for me. You were my only true friend in that hellhole of a house and made my childhood better

LJ: I'm.....glad i could do that for you....

Isaac: *slightly smiles* i know it's not easy but, could we maybe...actually try and get along this time? Atleast for william's sake?

LJ: i guess...we could try....but once you get old and fucked up I'm leaving you in a retirement home!

Isaac: i won't age! Dumbass!! I'm literally a damn corpse!

LJ: hahahaha!! I know! I'm just messing with ya!

[bad-bitch-beauchamp]

Songs About Me - Chapter Two

Chapter two is up!!! I started writing this all last night, and didn’t want to leave that chapter handing! I have the outline for this story all done and I’m actually pretty psyched about how it’s lining up. I want to take a minute to thank you all for all the kinds words and support yesterday, you’re the best and know how to make a girl feel welcome! Without further ado... Chapter two!

Read on AO3

Later that night, Beacon Hill, Boston, 21st Amendment Pub

“Claire! Over here!” Geillis was sitting at a high top table and stood up on the crossbar of the barstool to wave her over. As she stood up tall with an arm waving over her head, Claire noticed the two men sitting with her glance at her exposed midriff. One oggled her openly, while one looked appreciatively, and smiled down into his beer glass as he took a long drink. This must be Angus and Rupert, then. Claire smiled and wound through the crowd to the table. 

“Awright lads, this is my best girl Claire!” Geillis had clearly been here before her eight o’clock sharp deadline, judging by the way her Scots accent had thickened up. 

“Nice to meet you boys! Let me grab a drink and we can get to know each other!” Claire wove her way to the bar, ordered a few fingers of Laphroig whisky, and made her way back to the table. The 21st Amendment was the perfect watering hole for locals looking to enjoy a few bar snacks, and a lot of drinks. It had started to become a staple for their end-of-week blow offs between her and Geillis after a long week at the greenhouse. When he wasn’t stuck at the hospital, Joe often came out to join them, and tonight he had arrived in her absence and took her under his shoulder.

“I need to see you more than once a week! And now you’ve made it so I can only see you if I come to a karaoke bar?! What kind of joke is this, LJ?” 

“Blame our favorite redhead for this ingenious evening!” Claire jerked her head in Geillis direction. They laughed and hugged each other tight, and began to settle in for the evening. 

Aided by more than a few drinks, the four soon became fast friends. Claire came back from the bar for the third time to see Joe clearly entranced by the three Scots and their innate ability to make any story the best you’ve ever heard. 

“So there I am in bed, Chrissie on my left and Nettie, the butcher’s daughter, on the right. They get jealous of each other, start arguin’ about who I’m gonna swive first. Can ye believe it?” Rupert laughed through his oncoming hiccups; whether they was the result of the raucous laughter or the many pints of ale was anyone’s guess. 

“And then what happened, man?!” Joe leaned forward over the table toward Angus, and Angus leaned in towards Joe, slapping his hands on the table. Rupert opened his mouth to respond but before he could get out a single word, Claire quipped in. 

“I believe your left hand gets jealous of your right. That’s about all I believe!” 

For as loud as the pub had become, the little table surrounded with friends fell into an uncertain silence. Claire wondered if she could fit her other foot in her mouth, in addition to the one that was already there. Then… uproarious laughter. 

“I’ve… I’ve never heard a woman make a joke like that before!” Ruper was cackling now. “Christ, woman! Yer somethin’ else!” Angus was doubled over clutching his side, Joe choked on his drink, and Geillis was practically dissolving into laughter. Another voice, a different voice, came floating to her ear from behind on a warm whisper. 

“Yer a witty one, aye?” 

Claire spun around in her barstool, which was admittedly a mistake. Maybe one too many whiskeys, Beauchamp. She started to slide off the side backless chair when two hands steadied her by the waist. Once she -- and the room -- stopped spinning and came into focus, all she could see was ocean blue eyes. If her eyes were the color of her favorite burning whisky, his were the color of a cooling chaser. 

“Ye alright, lass?” The stranger smirked. She realized she was still holding on to his shoulders, and still staring into his eyes. She felt the muscles under his white v-neck shirt. His very tight shirt, she amended. His hair sparkled with all the same colors as the dark red trees lining the old brick streets outside -- shades of russet and gold, dark auburn and cinnabar. High cheekbones gave way to slanted eyes above and a jawline to cut her glass tumbler below.  Pull yourself together. He’s just a man, and one you don’t even know! 

“Oh, yeah, thanks, I’m fine, thank you,” she stammered as she climbed back on her chair, his hands never wavering from her hips. Why did she sound so formal? “I mean, I’m great!” She flashed him a big smile and then a thumbs-up. What the fuck is your problem?! Maybe find a middle ground? She sighed on a giggle as her eyes fell to the floor and looked up at him with crinkling eyes. “I’m -- ugh. Hi there, I’m Claire.” His smirk grew, his eyebrow rose. “Thanks for making sure I didn’t die just then,” she added hastily. He was watching her when she dared to glance up from under her lashes. 

The stranger waited until she was settled back on the barstool and went to extend his hand for a handshake, only to find his hands were otherwise occupied. He left them where they were, and settled in a little deeper. 

“Och, it’d be a right shame to lose ye to a swivelin’ stool and a dirty pub floor.” The smirk turned into an honest smile. “I’m James. Ye can call me Jamie, if ye like.” He glanced at his hands, one still on her hip and the other traveling up to her waist. Claire felt his thumb stroke her sides and glanced down to watch him unravel her with his touch. Who the hell was this guy? Ordinarily, she’d be offended by some guy holding onto her in a bar, but right now, she found herself hoping this one didn’t let go. She was still watching him trace his small circle on her waist when the hand on her hip reluctantly pulled away, while the one on her waist didn’t move at all. She glanced up to see a pink bloom appear in the tips of his ears and the triangle of chest visible through the dip in his shirt. It was her turn to smirk.

“Sorry ‘bout that, Sassenach. Got a wee bit distracted.” He shoved his free hand in the pockets of his worn jeans. 

“Sassenach--?” Suddenly she was cut off, by a loud voice behind them. 

“Jamie! Ye made it!” Jamie’s large hand pulled away from Claire’s side with a jolt and the absence made her shiver. Rupert and Angus were already making the introductions to their small table. The hellos and drink orders began and conversation between the group began again. Her head was dizzy, but not from the alcohol. She glanced up to see him eyeing her from over the top of his rocks glass, and her stomach flipped. Pull yourself together. Concentrating on the situation, she gathered that Jamie worked with Angus and Rupert at a small shop in the area, but missed the kind of work they did. 

With the addition of Jamie at their table, Geillis suggested they move to one of the booths lining the bar walls. The men blazed a trail forward through the crowd to secure seats, and Claire held Geillis back by the elbow. 

“I thought you said you only invited Rupert and Angus out tonight?” “I did! They asked if they could invite the third member o’ their party, and who am I to say no! Why, is something wrong?” 

Evidently no one else had seen her near fall, and Jamie’s rescue of her. “No, it’s fine, I just didn’t realize we’d have such a big group is all.” Geillis started to ask her another question but Claire nudged her friend forward. “Come on, they won’t hold seats for us forever!” 

Claire was the last to get to the table. Her step faltered for only a moment -- when the only open spot was next to Jamie. 

“I can move, if ye’d be more comfortable --”

“Do you mind if I sit here --?”

They spoke over each other quickly, and simply nodded in answer to each other’s questions. Jamie move down the bench as much as he could with Angus animatedly telling a story on the other side, and Claire filled in the vacant spot on the open end of the booth. It should have been awkward, being strangers forced into tight quarters… but she could’ve sworn he relaxed into side. 

Not a minute into settling down, the DJ at the front of the bar announced, “Next up we Claire, Geillis, and Joe!” 

Momentarily forgetting why they came here, the three friends jumped up from their seats and headed to the makeshift stage with two spotlights, a few microphones, and a small television screen. The men left at the booth watched them with confusion and excitement as they made their way up to the front, and ready for the show from their newfound friends. 

Claire, Geillis, and Joe each took a microphone and began to sing -- if one could really call it that. By the end of Like A Prayer, they were yelling the lyrics, howling with laughter, falling over each other with every repetition of “Just like a prayer, you know I’ll take you there!” The pub clapped and cheered, as a drunk bar on karaoke night often does, and the three friends made their way back to the booth still trying to get enough air back in their lungs after the ceaseless laughter. 

“I didna know ye could sing!” Rupert hugged Geillis into his side and Angus leaned over the tabletop to playfully punch Joe in the shoulder. 

“I think he means that we didna know ye were the type who can’t sing, but still goes to karaoke anyway!” Angus winked at Geillis, and she couldn’t seem to get her giggles under control. 

“Hey now! Joe and I might not be stars or anything, but at least we’re fun -- unlike ye three, who haven’t gone up once!” Taking a gulp from her pint glass, she narrowed in on Claire. “Besides, we sound okay because someone can actually sing when she wants.” The table’s attention immediately moved to Claire with a bombardment of questions. 

“Ye can sing, lass?!”

“Go on, get up there and sing for me! Make it a bonny one!”

“Are ye a pop singer or a rock singer? I’ll have a different opinion of ye depending on the answer, ken?”

Then, another warm whisper. A hand on her knee.  

“Ye don’t strike me as a singer, Sasssenach.” 

Claire turned to face him then, her voice equally quiet when his eyes met hers. “And what do I strike you as?”

“A lass who struggles with her balance, for one,” he replied, “and who’s bad with awkward introductions and saying thank you, for two.” His eyes never left hers, but the crinkles on the edges only deepened with his smirk. Claire scoffed and protested, moving her leg away from his under the table, but his grasp tightened imperceptibly and his thumb was stroking the inside of her knee. “Maybe one day I won’t have to save ye from falling, and I’ll get to hear ye sing a little better than what I just saw.” Taking a swig from his glass, he continued to watch her. Claire started to object to his ideas of her, but Jamie’s attention was called away by Joe asking questions about his work. 

An hour passed by with many more drinks and much more laughter, with plans to meet up again next week. Joe left the party first to get back to his apartment to prepare for work the next day, followed by Rupert who claimed he needed to be up early to go into the shop. Soon it was just Angus and Geillis, who were most definitely going home together, and Claire and Jamie, who were most definitely not. 

“So what is it you actually do? I’ve been sitting next to you for a few hours now without a single notion of who you are besides your name.” They were sitting facing each other as best they could, trading stories and getting to know one another while Geillis and Angus got almost too close for decency. 

“Och, it’s no’ much. I opened a little bookstore in the area a few years back, and Angus and Rupert are my employees. More than that, I suppose, since I’ve known them my whole life. The bookstore was more a passion project a few years back, ken? Then one day, I decided I loved it more than engineering and left it all behind to give my all to the books.” Jamie’s eyes sparkled with mention of the bookstore, and Claire wanted to see him look like that forever. 

“What kind of stock do you have?” 

Jamie’s eyes positively twinkled. “Lots of antiques and first editions. I learned how to repair and restore old books when I was in college in Edinburgh. We carry the Times best seller list and lots of newer titles as well, but there’s nothing I love like an old book.” He smiled at her, and she melted. “Actually, there’s a favorite of mine--”

“Claire, get on up here!” The voice from the front boomed again, and she sent Jamie a wink as she scooted out of the booth. He stared at her dumbstruck, but released his hold on her leg. 

“Since you said my last song was horrible,” she teased over her shoulder as she walked to the front. 

He gave a hearty laugh and yelled to her, “I never said it was horrible! I said it wasn’t good!”

Claire had been coming to this pub for years now with Geillis and Joe for drinks and karaoke night. She was on a first-name basis with the regular DJs, and everyone knew her regular songs. Tonight was different. Tonight, she had met Jamie. She whispered to the DJ, walked on stage, and pulled out the piano bench. In the time it had taken Claire to move up front, Jamie followed suit just behind her to a table at the front. He had noticed the piano of course, but paid it no attention. Who would play a piano in a pub on karaoke night?

Claire would, evidently. She sat down, rolled her head a few times along her shoulders, and looked toward their booth. Jamie saw her fear when he wasn’t where she thought he’d be. He gave her a small wave, hoping the motion would draw her attention. She noticed, and flashed him the most brilliant smile he’d ever seen. She took a deep breath, and without playing, began to sing. 

“Grab me by my ankles, I’ve been flying for too long; I couldn’t hide from the thunder in a sky full of song. I want you so badly but you could be anyone; I couldn't hide from the thunder in a sky full of song. Hold me down, I’m so tired now; Aim your arrow at the sky. Take me down, I’m too tired now, leave me where I lie.”

The accompaniment was simple and melodic, Claire’s voice strong and dark. Jamie watched her play, the lyrics not lost on him. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t move, he couldn’t do anything but watch her. His chin rested on his hand, his elbow propped on the table. In that moment, he wished the night would never end but if it had to, then may he have many more with the enchanting woman before him. 

Jamie didn’t realize she had stopped playing until the crowd began to cheer -- the only thing to exist for him, was her. She stood, pushed in the bench, and put the microphone stand back where it belonged like she had just done the most normal thing in the world. She walked toward him, slowing the closer she got to him. 

“Jamie, you haven’t moved once.” One step closer. “Well, you’d bloody well say something.” She folded her hands across her chest with a sigh, eyes downcast at the sticky floor. 

He blinked, stood, and brought a hand up to brush away a particularly unruly curl. A thumb caressed rosy apples, dark eyelids fluttered up to meet glittering oceans. 

“Christ, Claire. Yer the most incredible woman I’ve ever seen.”

[bedlamsbard]

Writing tag game -- tagged by @lessattitudemorealtitude

how many works do you have on Ao3?

Discounting podfic on which I’m listed as a co-author, 24.  My concept writing doesn’t go to AO3 and the vast majority of my Narnia fic was never cross-posted there.  (Or reposted there, actually, I think most of it pre-dates the AO3.)

what’s your total Ao3 word count?

1,050,810.  oh, huh, I didn’t actually realize I’d passed the one million word mark (probably with Crown).

what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

all of these ended up being Star Wars, which is not a huge surprise.  Morning will probably reach Dirt in the next couple of updates, I’d guess.

Immutable, or, Five Times Obi-Wan Kenobi Compromised His Jedi Ethics for Anakin Skywalker -- this is not the oldest Star Wars fic on there, but I think it’s the second oldest. people just really like 5 times fic.

Wake the Storm - did you know that when I started Wake I assumed it was a very niche trope in what was, at the time, a pretty dead fandom? the kudos count on Wake actually outnumbers Gambit by more than 1600 kudos, so the number of people who go from Wake to Gambit is a lot lower than you might think.

Queen's Gambit - a significantly lower kudos count than Wake or Immutable.  Gambit’s such a weirdo of a story, tbh, I can’t be surprised by anything about Gambit anymore.

On the Edge of the Devil's Backbone - about 600 kudos less than Gambit, so less difference between Gambit and Backbone than between Wake and Gambit.

Dirt in the Machine - another older fic.  I’d rewrite this one if I cared enough to do so, because it’s not at my current standards (Immutable isn’t either, for that matter) and I kind of wince every time I get comments on it.  this is the first one of the top five to have below 1K kudos.

do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I’ll usually respond to direct questions, but I very, very seldom respond to comments in general.  This is an old standing policy of mine that’s now more than a decade old -- it used to be I’d wait twenty-four hours before responding, then I��d respond right before the next chapter went up, and for a while I’d only respond to comments on the first few chapters of a story.  Now I just mostly do not.  The reasons for this are: (1) many, many years ago, I lost my temper pretty badly at a comment on a fic of mine (this was pre-AO3, this was back in my LJ days), and after that I moved to the “wait twenty-four hours” response so I didn’t say anything without thinking about it, (2) I do go back and reread comments but I hate rereading my own responses, (3) I prefer to know the comments numbers on my fic are all from actual comments and not from me saying “thanks for reading!”, (4) I can’t take that kind of responsibility for answering every single comment, man.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Of stuff I’ve written in the past ten years? (I can’t really remember before that.)  Maybe Backbone, because it ends on that pretty upbeat “yay team we’re going to be rebels now!” note.  or Devil’s in the Details (other side part 1), though I don’t really want to consider it a finished fic even though it’s technically finished; it has another “yay team we’re back together (minus Ezra)” ending.  I tend to end on complicated and reasonably open endings, not like...happy endings.

what’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

probably Gambit for the “everything is super fucked up” factor and also the fact that I never wrote the sequel. plus it ended with the entire Wake trio split up in a whole new universe, plus back in the Gambitverse Amidala not able to go back to Naboo, Ahsoka shunned, Palpatine’s new empire, Rex trapped in the Gambitverse, etc.

do you write crossovers?

I did in my Narnia days. I don’t anymore. Working in widespread fandoms like Star Wars or the MCU is basically like writing crossover fic within the same universe, anyway.

have you ever received hate on a fic?

*hysterical laughter*

...yes. yes I have. it’s the reason every time I get a comment notification on Gambit or Wake I freeze in absolute terror. people HATE Wake and Gambit.  I hate to say never, but I will probably never write those characters or in that series again.

do you write smut? if so, what kind?

not really?  I’ve done relatively non-explicit sex but it’s not something I’m super comfortable writing, especially in recent years. I’m much more likely to do a fade to black.

have you ever had a fic stolen?

I think Gambit got scraped once when it was still in progress and my response was something along the lines of “good luck, bro,” given the whole “still in progress” thing.

have you ever had a fic translated?

I’ve gotten a couple of translation requests but I can’t recall if anything’s ever been translated.  (Or if I responded to them...I know a few I forgot to respond.)

have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, back in my Narnia days.  Some SW concept writing and that ended so badly that I’ll never co-write again.

what’s your all-time favourite ship?

Kanan/Hera, of course!

what’s a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

gods, Dust in the Air, my Narnia Last Battle AU.  Back when I started it in 2008 or so I didn’t have the self-control or discipline I do now, even if I had a lot of the worldbuilding ability and the ability to conceive of if not execute long plot arcs, and I broke off more than I could chew.  If I ever went back to it I’d probably have to do a complete rewrite and it has the unique problem among my WIPs of being the last major fic I wrote in present tense -- I now write exclusively in past tense.  The bones of the story are good, I’d just have to go back to the bones and not just pick up where I left off.

what are your writing strengths?

Plot, worldbuilding/environment, action.  I also do genuinely think I’m very good at characterization too, but I think they’re all inter-related.  (Except the action, that’s me alone.  I love writing action and I generally get a lot of compliments on my action scenes.)  look, I know it’s conceited, but I’m good and I know I’m good, and I’m good in a pretty well-rounded way for the genre I write.

what are your writing weaknesses?

brevity. can’t do it.

honestly, there are others, but I don’t write stories where they’d come up.  I think I have a tendency to get to bogged down in dialogue in a way that I’ve never quite solved.  I also let my emotions take over too much and not in the good fannish way, in the “I’m having a fucked up relationship with canon or fandom and it’s affecting my ability to work” way.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

please stop having your Asgardians speak Latin for magic, man, that’s my feeling on it.

okay, my feelings on it for me -- I’ve sprinkled bits and pieces of Huttese, Twi’leki, and tee-tiny bits of other stuff here and there in fic.  I’d not be comfortable doing more than that because the only other language that I really feel comfortable doing anything significant in is Latin, and even then I’d hesitate. also, like, Latin! not a language that comes up in the fandoms I write in.  even then, like -- any extended dialogue should be intelligible to the audience, and I don’t expect my audience to be able read anything other than English; I’d rather just say “they switched to Twi’leki to say” or something similar.

what was the first fandom you wrote for?

like, online? Harry Potter. for things that I didn’t post online because I didn’t know what fic was yet? probably either The 10th Kingdom or The Mummy.

what’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

On the Edge of the Devil’s Backbone.  I think it’s the best thing I’ve ever written, I think it’s the most tightly plotted, I think it’s got the best worldbuilding, I think it’s remarkably consistent thematically, and it was, at the time, a fic that I was very devoted to finishing or dying trying, because I was going through it at the time and some of it was connected to the fic.

I don’t tag people, but please go for if you want!

[holydrawerart]

What If..

Theres a way where some people get affected by Creepypasta 'Curse'. Like being into one of them.

[Dark Content.]

My drunked points:

First on those Curse. Curses are more like "become into a Demon/Monster/Ghost/Error/Entity..

Idk if this is a HC. Just Thinking.

Relate Life about the cursed. Literally they end badly. Like, if the true Creepypastas have a game when they can make copies in different/paralel Universes, choosing people, Can be just for fun, or evil issues.

What Weird Freaks and misterious entities want of Us? Why y happens..? Are they watching us?.. Where they come from?.

Symptoms, like a Devil Disease.

Isnt cool. Just imagine you would get "Ender Curse" . No funny. Your body will change, your face deleted. Mind, Thoughts, those black tentacles shouting up your back. Any of them, and youre just a lil human, weak, it kills and you feel it.

Offenderman Point: Sexual Life will rotten you. You're inside a custom. Weakly faster your body shocked and then your "human mind" just figure the atrozz acts youve made. Nobody loves freaks anyway.

Mistake. Ending like a Science Project. Doctors said that youre so pretty kind of necessary to do "it/that"/ , then they fucked your Life as worst could happen.

Other Entities: Dimensional Freaks. Someone is watching the TV. Little hostage, you Dont know the hands of Him is satisfied by a Show he invented. Laughing. You're the clown tonight.

Rake Point: IDK where he could from.. But sees too sad be a lonely nonsensed monster. Humans like tonInvestigates and catch.

People having some Proxy stuff. Not by Slenderman. Things made by Toby, for example; you will understand what kind of pain he has. He wont needs you in the team, fuck u. Just get a littlebit "Living Dead".

I cant figure hows could be Smiledog curse.. Be sorrounded by a red Husky... Hm, maybe just.. Idk soeownf.

Laughing Jack? [Possibly you be the Witness of a lot of Children Murders by LJ. And Clownshitty].

Respecting Sally: See her.

Ben Drowned: Ok. I like a lot his Creepypasta and how at many ways you can.. Be a Video Game Ghost. So, you live somethings to finally ends inna way to "Play the Shit". Ben turns you like a Pawn. You're the Ben Drowned but just him has the "Control" by your acts like a Game Avatar. (In this, your Home/House/City/World is affected, turned into a Virtual Simulation. Infernal Loops. Bloody Ways to participate with your friends at Madness Tours.

Ben: Theres a Lot of players overhere. Wonder, what can u do with a new ruled enviro.

'Cria Cuervos' Points: I have to say i made the-HC-done Origin of him. This Entity usually stole or "vanish" Children, usually; Girls. "Nobody know where the children are or what he did. If he harms them, eats them. They, dissapeared after he cames at the room on night, looking them. Getting closer.. Showing his flaming eyes and Skully Distorted Face.

Maybe hes looking for Margaret.. but, shes gone. Where? [I have an idea about It on my HC.] — Whatever, you wont be a Scarecrow, but you can fatigue with his trauma. Crows Over. He tell them what to do. Eyes Out. Be aware. This Entity isnt the same. Before be caughted by Frederick, usually children have nightmares when some "thing" sorround.

I Dont know exactly his thoughts now. But, he used to be a sad man who people hate. Margaret make him feel loved and "normal". He was too depressed, i guess. His older Brother, Santiago De Mendoza was the worst fuck on that Spanish "tale". Santiago hated Margaret's presence/company at their old house. He decided "something" about what to do with the House Debts, he "have to take out that stupid little girl. He doesnt care about.

Eventually, his actions and, he.. Killed Frederick and turned him inna Scarecrow which Margaret could saw by the window on kitchen. It was outside hanging..

What If: Creepypastas Analizyng. Scent.

A Way to be what usually we degree.

Fear Study. Human Behaviour. How humans affords problems? Can the fkn World save itself of It?. What about Apocalypse?.

God.[Wichever you believe for]. No, can not save World. This is a Lesson, lets learn mdkfs.

FREAÆKS DO YÖÜ‽. Oh. Yes. Humans HATES A LOT OF "MONSTERS". Not all, but theres a way to see Freak Points.

Guillermo del Toro knows. We know.

//Will post some ideas and a Headcanon called CTHW. I rlly want to work in some story about Pastas.//

[If you want, ask]

[aelaer]

Uhh can I ask for BBC Sherlock fic recs? (Preferably friendship and/or familial fics, but romance is okay too)

Ooohh boy are you in for a list. I know you asked this like, at the start of quarantine or at sometime where I decided that I was no longer interested in communicating with the wider world, but hopefully this will still be of interest to you?

Throughout 2018 I did very little writing because I was busy consuming everything offered by the Sherlock fandom produced over 7-8 years. I definitely read well into the millions of words. A lot of them were from specific collections on both ff.net and AO3. I recommend looking in “collections” on ff.net in particular (as I still can’t really figure out how collections work on AO3 and how to find them easily... it’s really easy to find them on ff.net).

To my knowledge, these are all complete.

If there is any romance tagged here, it’s because it’s really, really fucking good as romance is my least favorite genre. I cannot remember all of them, but there’s a lot of angst, definitely humour, and definitely some great canonical bits. Also whumpy ones that are either really really good or a bit ridiculous but there you go.

It’s long, so under a cut. If the cut doesn’t work, I have tagged it as well.

From ff.net (alphabetical order) - NOTE: I did NOT include anything from the authors I recommended because the list was already too freaking long! But be sure to check out the authors, you can sort by “category” on ff.net on their author page and then go down to “Sherlock” to find their works:

Anything by A Wandering Minstrel (sooooo many genres)

Most anything by chappysmom (tons of genres, some are excellent, some I could take or leave, overall good stuff)

Most anything by Dayja (she writes in a ton of genres, so some I *adore* while others aren’t my cup of tea, but overall good stuff)

Anything by Gwen's Blue Box if you want angst up the wazoo.

Anything by ivywatcher for fantastic character studies.

Most anything by Jennistar1 (another multi-genre writer, both friendship and slashfic)

Anything by Radon65 - a mix of stuff. Canon IIRC.

Anything by Richefic for good, canon-friendly gap-fillers

Anything by StillWaters1 for good, canon-friendly gap-fillers

A Brief Account Of Life With Zombies  by Silver Pard Sherlock thinks it's all a bit of a nuisance, John is having the time of his life, and Mycroft is Not Impressed. With anything, but mostly his minions' inability to provide a good cup of tea. Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,384 - Complete

A House is not a Home  by selenityshiroi  This is a prompt fill from the LJ Fic Meme.  John and Sherlock got a flat share because they needed to split the rent.  But when John comes into money, people wonder 'why hasn't he found a place of his own'   The actual prompt is inside the story Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,190 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete

Annie's Song  by Berouge She has a second engagement with a man and his violin, in the park, at night. Sherlock's not going for it! ONESHOT! Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,869 - Sherlock H., Molly Hooper - Complete

Basic Training  by chai4anne Summary: A death at a boys' school leads to conflict and revelations among Lestrade's team, Sherlock, and John. Set between "The Hounds of Baskerville" and "The Reichenbach Fall." No slash. Rated: T - English - Mystery/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,851 - Sherlock H., John W., DI Lestrade, Sgt. S. Donavan - Complete

Breaking Point  by Haelia  When Sherlock and Donovan are abducted and Sherlock is grievously wounded, it is up to Donovan to get them both out.  "First things first, Freak.  You do not give me orders.  You are going to do everything I tell you to," Sally said sharply, "because we are getting out of here."  Can they both escape with their lives from the most dangerous gang in London? Rated: T - English - Mystery/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,401 - Sgt. S. Donavan, Sherlock H. - Complete

Firestorm  by Dustbunny13 Sherlock returns, but his friendship with John is damaged. Nevertheless, they embark on their final hunt to finish off Moriarty's net, but it ends in a catastrophe: Sherlock is shot and lapses into a coma. As John keeps vigil, he reads Sherlock's diary written during the hiatus. Slowly, he begins to understand and finds himself wishing for another miracle. Completed. Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Adventure - Chapters: 53 - Words: 133,754 - Complete NOTE: Probably my favorite novel-length multi-chapter you find only on ff.net for this fandom.

How To Accidentally Summon a Demon  by patster223 Sherlock is possessed by a demon. A damned, wicked soul that uses the kitchen table for blood rituals and experiments. John doesn't even notice the difference. Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,411 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete

Kidnapped! A Comedy by scuttlesworth Poor kidnappers. Kidnapping John Watson is like pulling on a thread tied to all sorts of crazy. It's enough to make a bloke get a job and go straight. Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,758 - John W. - Complete

Mobile Phones, Rubble and Shock  by prettybirdy979  In the aftermath of the explosion, Lestrade must work to keep Sherlock Holmes alive and make sense of his communications... with only a mobile phone and Sherlock buried under the rubble of the pool. Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,679 - Sherlock H., DI Lestrade - Complete

Mouth of Babes  by Morgan Stuart  Several weeks after the explosion at the pool following "The Great Game" episode, Lestrade visits the recuperating Sherlock and John at 221B Baker Street. He brings case files and food... and a visitor in tow. Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,495 - Sherlock H., DI Lestrade - Complete NOTE: This is a whole series. If you like it, look up the rest under the author. It’s super cute.

Of Surgeons and Soldiers  by EmRose92 Being a doctor has its advantages. He knows how to put people back together, and he knows how to take them apart. 221B is forced into a hostage situation, and John seems to be the only one who has the power to get them out of it. Includes BAMF John, protective Sherlock, and several unfortunate criminals who mess with the wrong army doctor. No slash. Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 9,695 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete

The Empty Home  by chai4anne Sherlock would always be haunted by memories of one particular case. The first body, its once-so-familiar features blurred by the passing of time and death, moved him more than he would ever have expected. But the worst was the skeleton he uncovered later, bits of hair and clothes still clinging to it—which had no effect on him whatever, until he looked up and saw John's face. Rated: T - English - Mystery/Suspense - Chapters: 28 - Words: 150,773 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete

The frigid trench  by Nova-chan Sherlock is badly hurt. And alone. And incapacitated. Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 15 - Words: 13,118 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete

The Hand You're Dealt  by Lady Sam Mallory Sherlock, John and several others are trapped in a building when an explosion disrupts the crime scene they are working. COMPLETE. Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,092 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete

The Secret Identity of John Watson  by scifigrl47  Taken out of context, John Watson leads a terrifying life.  You have to wonder what those poor women he dates thinks of it, especially if John decides to try keeping one away from Sherlock, and Sherlock decides that it'd be best if he could get rid of her Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 29,251 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete

This Is What He Does For Fun  by nyssa123   Sherlock and John go to the pub after a long day and Sherlock realizes that the man sitting next to them is a serial killer. He then proceeds to tell everyone how he knows. Written for a prompt on the LJ kinkmeme.

Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,147 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete

Totem  by IshkabibbleScribble  Rescuing Sherlock from the clutches of a violent terrorist cell forces John to rely on a long-unused, lethal skill. Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,752 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete

War Wound  by SoulfireInc  Set sometime after Sherlock's return, before John's wedding to Mary Mortsan. An old comrade of John's arrives at 221B Baker St, scared and desperate for the consulting detective's help. Perhaps, had Sherlock known the consequences he and John would suffer as a result of this surprise encounter, he never would have accepted the case ... [Written before season three aired.] Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 21,319 - Sherlock H., John W., DI Lestrade, OC - Complete

From AO3 (alphabetical order) - NOTE: Just like the ff.net list, I did NOT include anything from the authors I recommended because these lists are just ginormous.

NOTE: I did *not* include warnings, pairings, etc in these summaries (too many tags to try and organize in the messy copy/pastes). Read the tags if you have any sensitivities/squicks/etc for all links!

Most anything by CaffieneKitty (over 100 shorts, so some I really love, others I can pass. Well worth checking out)

Anything by dragonnan if you want a huge wallop of angst. Also illustrations. Also writes in the MCU.

Anything by Jolie_Black (You thought stories written in script could only be bad? You thought WRONG. Very very canon-compliant goodness).

Anything by sgam76 (another multi-genre writer)

A Freak Adventure   by  dioscureantwins Words:    13,719    Chapters:    1/1    Teen And Up Audiences Sherlock Holmes Sally Donovan John Watson Mrs. Hudson Oh Christ, the Freak will be like a dog with two tails if she turns to him for assistance. Sally can feel her hands curling into fists ready to punch the condescending smirk off his face as she glares at the lift panel, willing the lift to go faster. But this is about Susy, Sally tells herself, not about him or Sally’s abhorrence of the atrocious git. She’s still convinced he gets off on it but he can wank himself into a stupor over Susy’s disappearance for all she cares as long as he finds her.

A Smelly Affair  by  dioscureantwins  Words:    13,756    Chapters:    1/1   General Audiences Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mrs Hudson Greg Lestrade Molly Hooper Anthea Mycroft Holmes Sherlock had published an interesting thesis on the splintering of various woods on his website. As well as an equally fascinating treatise on different types of ropes and knots and the best techniques for securing someone. Obviously, his captors had followed those instructions to the letter; thereby disproving John’s theory nobody took notice of Sherlock’s website. A victory, perhaps, but one Sherlock felt he could have done without. Trust his readership to turn the tables on the author.   Morons.

Constantly      by thesignsofserbia Words:    4,530    Chapters:    1/1    Mature Sherlock Holmes Mycroft Holmes Mycroft and Sherlock have a tenuous relationship at best, but with Sherlock taking down Moriarty's web, they might need each other more than they'd care to admit.

Croatia-Water-Blue      by hollyesque Words:    12,117    Chapters:    1/1 Not Rated Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mycroft Holmes “I…” John licks his lips, twitches his fingers as though he wants to reach out, “I’m here, Sherlock,” he says; “I know I haven’t been, but…but I am now.” Sherlock wrinkles his nose. Haven’t been—? “What on earth do you mean, you haven’t been here?” he asks, “You’ve been living here.”

Getting to Know You      by  Dimity Blue (Arnie) Words:    4,605    Chapters:    1/1   General Audiences Arthur Weasley/Molly Weasley Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mycroft Holmes John picked up the kettle.  "Nothing from Lestrade?"Sherlock flipped himself over on the sofa and presented John with his back; John sometimes felt he was living with a cat.Clicking the switch on the kettle, John grinned to himself and, keeping his tone casual, said, "Maybe you could send him an owl."There was silence for a few seconds, then Sherlock asked, "Why would I send him an owl?"

Landscape With The Fall Of Icarus      by CaitlinFairchild Words:    4,572    Chapters:    1/1   Teen And Up Audiences Sherlock Holmes Mycroft Holmes John Watson Closing his eyes, Sherlock allows himself a brief swell of feeling--let’s not put a name on it, just call it a feeling--for his big brother. He knows that when Mycroft opens that steel door again, every man now inside will be a fresh corpse.The East Wind will take them all, Sherlock thinks fuzzily, before the curtain of sleep descends.

London Orbital   by merripestin Words:    13,642    Chapters:    1/1    General Audiences Greg Lestrade Sally Donovan Sherlock Holmes John Watson "I'm driving first," Sally said.  "Guv can take over after me. If we're all still mad enough to be at this after that,  John can drive third shift.  Then the freak, if we decide we can risk it.""John doesn't drive," said Sherlock."Then what's John along for?" Sally protested. Which Greg reckoned had to be just Sally trying to wind Sherlock up.  She knew better.  All night in a car with Sherlock was bad enough.  All night driving round and round the M25 looking for a killer, with Sherlock deprived of John Watson, sounded like a new circle of hell.   

Official Recruiter by Captain_Author Words:    49,469    Chapters:    21/21   General Audiences  Clint Barton Phil Coulson Sherlock Holmes John Watson Stephen Strange Crimes were so simple before aliens, gods, and supernatural abilities made themselves known. But Sherlock Holmes never enjoyed simple and these inhumans and mutants provided quite a challenge. SHIELD needed someone to find the superpowered. Funny how both their needs can be met.

Rigging screws, size 1 3/8 inch, galvanised  by  AJHall    Words:    15,250    Chapters:    6/6    Teen And Up Audiences Sherlock Holmes John Watson "How's a woman supposed to prove her husband's a murderer, dammit?" On the eve of a planned voyage to Brittany, Marjorie Jameson starts her day with no problems more pressing than forcing a boatyard to do an emergency repair to the family yacht.  A chance encounter at the Cowes hi-speed ferry terminal begins to unravel a web of conspiracy and murder, with her charming, untrustworthy husband Julian right at the centre and Marjorie as the next intended victim.But no-one's going to trust the word of an aging housewife whose complaints of abuse the police have previously dismissed as delusions.

Somewhere in the Dinaric Alps      by  drpepperdiva91 Words:    1,735    Chapters:    1/1    General Audiences Sherlock Holmes John Watson Sherlock is caught off-guard by a flashback to his time in Serbia, just before John arrives home from work. Sweet, but still semi-realistic, hurt/comfort.

The Case of the Missing Bus Ticket      by  Unsentimentalf Words:    10,543    Chapters:    1/1   General Audiences Dirk Gently Sherlock Holmes Richard MacDuff John Watson Mycroft Holmes When Dirk and Richard's new client inexplicably fails to stay alive long enough to pay them, their ailing finances mean that a certain amount of subterfuge is required to get them back to London. The sudden death of their client has, however, attracted the attention of another rather more famous (if less holistic) detective and the stage is set for a long distance bus ride of suspense…

The Green Blade   by  verityburns Words:    72,929    Chapters:    15/15   Teen And Up Audiences Sherlock Holmes John Watson Lestrade (Inspector) Mycroft Holmes Sally Donovan Anderson (Sherlock) Mrs. Hudson As a serial killer hits the headlines, the police are out of their depth and the next victim is out of time. With faith in Sherlock Holmes at an all time low, this is a case which will push loyalties to the limit... WARNING: COMMENTS CONTAIN SPOILERS!

The Holiday    by Scriblit Words:    18,962    Chapters:    9/9    Mature Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mycroft Holmes Mrs. Hudson Greg Lestrade Molly Hooper Mary Morstan ACD Canon Characters A month following an horrific, sadistic attack during a case, Sherlock is still physically incapacitated and emotionally damaged. A holiday is suggested, but even stuck out in the middle of nowhere, he and John happen upon a case that could make Sherlock begin to feel like his old self again - or could kill him.BBC Sherlock Reworking of ACD's Devil's Foot, with Illustrious Client in flashbacks. Scenes of violence and implied "off screen" sexual violence/sexual assault.

The Shallow End      by  hollyesque Words:    6,923    Chapters:    1/1   Teen And Up Audiences Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mycroft Holmes "I told you once that I don't have friends," he says to John's back, "Now you know why."

The Silence of the Bees  by  trappedinathoughtbubble Words:    14,169    Chapters:    7/?    Mature Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mary Morstan Mary Watson Greg Lestrade Mycroft Holmes A kidnapped teenage girl. A political conspiracy. Bees. And somehow in the midst of it all, John learns a few things Sherlock forgot to mention about those two years. Note: Not completed, but the author's around and one of the sweetest people ever if you want to give encouragement to take a look again at this story!

The Triple Bluff    by SarahKnight  Words:    28,331    Chapters:    8/8   Mature Sherlock Holmes Greg Lestrade Mycroft Holmes Sally Donovan Philip Anderson Sherlock annoys his landlord at Montague street, grows to hate Donovan and gets into trouble a lot on a kidnapping case involving a woman who bullied him as a child.The events leading up to A Study In Pink. A case fic that answers questions from the first episode such as why Sherlock had to leave Montague Street and find a new flatmate, why he and Lestrade both quit smoking but didn't know the other had, why there's so much animosity between Sherlock and Donovan, and why Sherlock hates traveling in a police car.

Welcome Home    by   thesignsofserbia Words:    3,435    Chapters:    1/1    Teen And Up Audiences Sherlock Holmes John Watson Mrs. Hudson Mycroft Holmes "All my nightmares escaped my head. Bar the door, please don’t let them in. You were never supposed to leave. Now my head's splitting at the seams."

And of course I have my own Sherlock/Doctor Strange crossover up on AO3 if that tickles your fancy, illustrations and all. :D

But if you haven’t delved deep into the fandom, this should tide you over for some time.

This list is by no means an exhaustive list of recs. I didn’t really include anything that concentrated on a romantic pairing, for instance. I left off anything explicit as well. But yeah, here’s a small amount of the overall goodness produced by the BBC Sherlock fandom over the last 10 years.

[asteralpine]

Just some musing on my laptop. Not interesting, lmfao.

So a few months ago I got my dad to give me one of his old laptops so I could use it at school because Chromebooks fucking suuuuuuuck to do Google Meets on. It's janky (that's why it's one he doesn't use anymore) and doesn't actually charge the battery so when the cord comes out, it shuts off. BUT it was way faster than my good ol' reliable laptop (less bloatware I think) so after school let out I started using it to play around on and write fics and stuff.

But then the cord started getting looser and looser and twice I lost chunks of a story I wrote when I moved wrong and the cord shifted and the computer shut off SO I sucked it up and booted up my ol' reliable computer (which mostly works fine even though one of the hinges is wonky and I'm always slightly afraid that I'm going to fuck the screen up) and uninstalled a lot of stuff (if you're as sick of Microsoft Edge Updates as I am but your computer ALSO won't let you uninstall it, you can use CCleaner to uninstall it!!) and defragged and did a bunch of scans on it and fixed a bunch of stuff and now it's fiiine.

And now I'm back on ol' reliable and the keyboard makes such good sounds and I just love this one. I'm still eyeing new computers with better hinges because I don't close this one ever, just in case I fuck up the screen, but man, it's really silly how attached I can become to an inanimate object.

There's really no point to this post. Maybe I'm just using my Tumblr like my LJ for a minute. But that's all! Shout out to the laptops I've known and loved.

[kayrogers]

to all the girls i've loved before ][ p. parker

a tatbilb au

Paring(s): LJ!tom holland x PK!reader

Inspo: TATBILB cause Peter is a total soft boi and also I'm a slut for rom-coms

Word Count: 1500+

Warning(s): cursing and Peter being an awkward bean

Part: prologue | part 1 | part ??

A/N: andddd we back what’s popping y’all

You sat outside the Parker residence, well the apartment building he lived in, tapping your fingers against the steering wheel of your car. Butterflies filled your stomach as you made your game plan. You were definitely going to confront him that was for sure, but you weren’t sure how. Pull a usual [Y/n] and practically yell at the poor kid or try to be as calm as he usually was? The entire situation freaked you out. Especially how much you... actually liked the kiss?

Taking a large obnoxious breath, you stepped out of the Jeep and made your way into the building. The elevator ride up was filled with more nerves than you thought possible. Once reaching his floor, hoping your memory of his apartment was correct, you found his door.

You ringed your knuckles against the door, almost gasping when it opened immediately.

“[Y/n]?” Instead of finding the strange boy you expected, there stood May.

“Hi!” You have an awkward wave only to be pulled into a surprisingly strong embrace.

“Oh my gosh! Little [Y/n]! I haven’t seen you since you moved. Look at how pretty you got. And tall!” The brunette gushed and pulled away from you with a large smile.

You blushed at her compliments, bashfully shrugging as she quickly ushered you inside.

“What brings you here? Want me to make you a chocolate milk or something? I don’t have the farm-made you used to like, but I have Nesquik!” May excitedly babbled on while you took a look at the interior of the place you once knew like the back of your hand.

It felt a lot... emptier. Sure, Peter had lost his parents when he was young, but there was always May and Ben. Now there was just May. You remembered Ben’s funeral, how hard it must have been for Peter. He couldn’t look anyone in the eyes that day, he could barely even get through his eulogy. You wished that the two of you hadn’t grown so far apart that day so you could comfort him. But life had different plans.

“I uh actually need Peter, is he home?” She stopped rifling through her cabinets at your question.

“Oh? In that case he is at Gugino’s, down the block. Can I ask why? Sorry I’m just nosy and excited, you have to come back for dinner soon!” You paused at May’s question, knowing the truth would be way too embarrassing for Peter.

“We’re working on an independent chem project for extra credit. I didn't see him at all in school today, so I just want to get it started.” Double lie, good job [Y/n].

“Then I will stop holding you here! Have fun on your little study date!” May ushered you out of the apartment in the same frantic nature she possessed since you were little.

Though hearing the word ‘date’ made your eyes go wide.

“It’s not a-... date.” She closed the door before you could even finish your sentence.

Peter would definitely be hearing back about this.

You couldn’t dwell on May though, you had a mission. Confront Parker’s scrawny ass. The letter? One thing. Looked like he wrote it in the eighth grade, weird but whatever. Him jumping you in the middle of gym?? Totally different story.

Stubbornness took over and you didn’t even have the time to think about how soft his lips were and how chills went down your spine when his hand touched your waist. Nope none of it. Absolutely not.

The drive to Gugino’s was indeed just down the block and you are thankful to see Peter inside from your car window. As well as his bike barely locked into the bike stand out front. You shook your head, that shit was bound to get stolen.

Gugino’s was a small Italian diner which primarily focused on pizzas and deli sandwiches, the smell that greeted you on the inside was pure nostalgia. Though you didn’t have time to bask in old memories, you had questions which needed major answers.

You took it upon yourself to join the boy at his lone table, not so gracefully making yourself a seat with a “Sup Parker.”

He gasped while taking a sip of his soda, nearly making him choke. “O- oh! Hi [Y/n].” He meekly replied, and you could feel just how much he was already panicking.

Even when he looked like he wanted to run away from you he was cute. How did you never realize this? You shook your head to dispel the thought line before it could get any further. There was a time and place for deciding on how adorkable he is and it is not right now.

A waiter stopped by the table and patted Peter on the shoulder. He was an older Italian man, grays occupying what was left of his balding head. He had a warm face though.

“Oh.. and anything for your lady friend, Peter?” He smirked while Peter put his head in his hands.

“She’s not with-“

“I’ll take mozzarella sticks and do you have cherry coke?” You interrupted the boy with a smirk.

The man smiled, “coming right up, Sweetheart.”

The two of you sat in awkward silence for the next few seconds, yourself actually choosing to wait for him because you knew he would make it even more uncomfortable. Well, make himself uncomfortable, you felt fine.

“So... uh what brings you here?” You nearly giggle at his question, but pull yourself together to put on that nonchalant attitude he apparently doesn’t like about you.

“Who? Me? I’m just here for some fried cheese sticks. Though I guess while you’re around I’ll ask... what the hell was that today?? See normally when a girl rejects a guy over a love letter he wrote when he was 14, said guy takes the hint. No instead, you made out with me in front of the student body and ran away!” Peter’s face turns more and more pink as you ramble, and you hate how cute you find it.

“[Y/n] [Y/l/n]. I am not trying to date you, I’m so sorry about today.” He says and you two both pause when the waiter brings over your mozzarella sticks and soda.

“Okay well, here’s the thing. Your mouth is saying something... but your mouth was also saying something today? So forgive me if I’m a little confused.” You dunked a stick in marinara sauce with a cheeky grin.

He shook his head, “I only kissed you because I wanted to make someone else think I wasn’t in love with them.”

Well way to make a girl not feel special, Parker. Then again, at least it confirmed that he wasn’t obsessed with you. Still weird, though.

“Oh.. who?” Your confused frustration quickly disappeared, changing instead to a devious curiosity.

He shakes his head, lips pursing as if to say he wouldn’t be answering that question.

“You know... I could just tell the whole school that you wrote me-“

“Fine! It’s MJ. And you’re not the only one that got a letter okay, so get off your high horse.” This time you did actually giggle at his frustration, finding the boy to be very entertaining.

“Damn player. Isn’t she like one of your best friends, why don’t you just ask her out?” His jaw dropped and Peter rapidly shook his head.

“She was never supposed to read that letter! None of you were. I can’t- me and MJ are so close, I don’t want to scare her away by saying I’m in love with her. Though I guess I already crossed that bridge.” To be honest, you felt for the guy.

Sure the letter thing was a bit strange, but it was clearly something personal for him. Maybe a diary type medium, and it really seemed like he didn’t want anyone to read them. Even as a kid he had been that sweet, emotional type. Which was welcome in the small friend group the two of you used to occupy.

Flash was an ass. MJ was aloof, mysterious, and not even there half the time. Peter was quiet. You were wild. Ned was a dork. And Harry was somehow the playboy who always butted heads with you for the leadership position. Though that changed almost immediately after he transferred to his fancy rich boy school. And then you moved out to the nearby suburbs, with Flash as your boyfriend.

MJ and you felt out of touch too easily. And Peter and Ned became just a ‘hi’ in the hallway. Though, that was just the way time managed.

By the time he finished ranting, you had already finished your mozzarella sticks and soda.

“That’s rough, Parker. I’m sorry these got out, just from mine... seemed really personal. I’m sure you and MJ will be okay though.” You comforted him, placing a hand on his shoulder before standing up to take your trash out.

“Want me to give you a ride home? Least I can do after ambushing you.” You add and he has a small smile on his face before he nods.

The ride home is silent for the most part. Both of your minds are too occupied to speak. Yours fills with thoughts of the day after that kiss. All your friends mentioned how word got to Flash and just how pissed he got. You hoped he wouldn’t lash out on Peter, but part of you was happy that he was jealous. Not that he had any right to be considering he was the one that fucked it all up.

Then, it was as if you had been struck with a stroke of genius.

“What if we just let everyone think we’re dating?”

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