#LIKE YES. IT DID. WOULD YOU RATHER THE MOVIE TAKE A WEIRD TONE SHIFT WHERE JACK RUNS INTO THE FOREST FOR DAYS TO FIND THE DOORS AGAIN.

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

i have such an intense hatred for cinemasins-esque commentary on movies. where is your whimsy. where is your suspension of disbelief. do you hate fun.

[physicalturian]

[18+] Deranged Love - Hanma Shuji x F!Reader - Part 1

[Probably contains spoilers from the anime and the manga] [She/Her pronouns used for the reader, no physical description; Everyone is +18]

Words: 9403

Archive of our own

Warnings : Explicit! / Blood / Injuries / Guns / Bruises / Choking / Blood / Graphic depiction of violence / Killing / Murder / Crying / Trauma /

Summary : Wrong place, wrong guy. Wrong in so many fucking ways it only made the attraction more sick and twisted...Yet I wanted more of him and would end up doing anything for him, with him.

If you feel like I should add more warnings, send me a dm or and ask, I'd rather be safe than sorry

- - -

Routine.

This would be how I would describe my way of life, a routine. I liked it like that, it was safe, comfortable and I was sure of what would happen. Far from me the idea of only doing the same things over and over again, I would sometimes go out with my friends or see a movie—doing things on a whim was not off the table. But I liked knowing what I was signing up for. Surprises, however, never were a thing I enjoyed—seeing my friends in my house when all I wanted was to relax after work was something dreadful and annoying to no end. I would pull through and be a good host, nonetheless, making sure everything was enjoyable, but I would be drained by the end of their stay.

Perhaps that need for reassurance, for a safety net, was the reason why I never truly took an artistic path or even considered any artistic career. It was too free, too unpredictable, too risky. Never could I have imagined myself doing such a thing; those who did were in my eyes the boldest and I admired them greatly for following their dream, but I was not bold, I preferred the solace of a job I knew would always bring me money. A simple 9 to 5 job was fulfilling enough for me; for some it was not, but I enjoyed it. It was something I could do and found relaxing to do, even when there was more rush. It just made sense to me.

There was not much thrill in this job. The people were nice enough; the clients were a bit bitter from time to time, depending on whether the job we had done was in their favor or not. Some of my colleagues would tell me crazy stories about some firms they had worked on or with and I would have a hard time believing it, but perhaps it was because different departments would deal with different types of clients. I had simple people: homeowners, tax payers, easy stuff. I liked it.

Now, even if I was keen on this routine that I had of going to my job, using the same transports, the same paths, headphones in to ignore the people around, I knew when following that same path would bring me trouble. I knew when to break that routine even just a little bit.

Tonight was one of those rare occasions. As I walked back home from work after having had to stay one more hour to help my colleague Darren fix his mistake—I made sure to tell him he owed me for helping him this late—I saw a group of men surrounding someone on the street. With one glance around, the entire street was empty except for those seven men and their victim. The usually crowded place was completely deserted and as I wondered how it could have happened, I noticed bikes at the end of the road blocking any possible traffic. It did not take a genius to know this was something far above me, there was no way I would interfere with that. Turning around, I made sure my steps were less heavy, less determined and started walking back. I did not have time to think I was going to get out of there safely when I heard, “Miss! Call the police-“. A thud sound, followed by a pained moan reached my ear.

When I dared look over my shoulder, I saw the man on his knees, blood pouring from his nose. I recognized him, he was a creepy older man that would sometimes stay longer on the train to look at younger women. Glancing at the other people around him, I kept my face as neutral as possible. Should I call the police? The outfits they wore all had the same sigil on them, the same pattern, and since they did not look like high schoolers I hardly believed those were school uniforms. Which led to the conclusion that they were the ones the news talked about a lot. The city was filled with gangs fighting over territory, not hesitating one bit to kill anyone who would cross them. I was sure of myself, assertive, yes… but I did not possess a savior complex. Seeing that man on the floor made me realize how wrong the system was, but I could not risk taking part in the situation and helping him. There were too many and clearly a lot scarier and stronger than I was. Looking away, I kept walking and heard them laugh, “That’s the right thing to do missy, he deserved it-“ “I said I was going to pay as soon as I got the money!” The victim interrupted; he was speaking very fast, but the fist smashing his jaw was faster to tell him to shut up. “It ain’t about that, you know it!”

Playing my music again, louder this time, I walked away and let them deal with everything, taking a different route than the one I would usually take. It’s alright to not have helped, you wouldn’t have made a difference… But he deserved it… I can still call the police… A turmoil inside my head started as I kept walking. After a few minutes, I grabbed my phone and dialed the police department’s number; they picked up quite fast, asking me what the emergency was. “There are gang members beating up a man in-“ “I’m sorry ma’am we can’t help with that, have a nice evening.” And just like that, the person on the other end of the phone hung up. Looking at my phone incredulously, I called again, all while taking a turn and walking by a warehouse, “Hello, you must have misunderstood me earlier—it is not a joke, there are gang members in the-“ This time, I was not interrupted by the person on the phone but by my arms being grabbed suddenly.

My heartbeat picked up, I suddenly felt sick and my head started spinning. When things like this happened, we’d always think it only happened to others, so when I realized it was happening to me, I did not feel well. Blood drained from my face, from my entire body. It all happened so fast: one moment I was walking past the warehouse, then suddenly my phone hit the ground and I joined it when I was thrown on it with force. My cheekbone took all the damage as someone pressed the side of my face onto the wet ground and made sure to put weight on my back to stop me from moving. I was shivering in fear already, but that fear only grew when my hair was pushed out of the way by a bloody hand, its knuckles painted red and brown from fresh and drying blood. The action did not feel one bit intimate, it was scary, intimidating. With the pressure on my back, I was pressed against the hard floor and could barely breathe, but in a situation like this I knew better than to talk.

I knew that. Yes.

So why did I talk? Why were my nerves acting up in moments like these?

“I am sure you got the wrong person—I’m just an accountant-“ A gun was now pressed against my cheek, I took it as a sign to shut up and did so. The man on my back twisted the gun a few times against my cheek, making me open my mouth from the weird movements against my teeth, like someone forcing a dog to open its jaws to get food out of it. “Aren’t we noisy? Tonight wasn’t the right night to feel heroic, girl.” The man asked as he tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. I closed my eyes in discomfort, my breath hitching. Laughing sadistically, he continued talking, this time his tone lowered, “Rats shouldn’t snoop in businesses that aren’t theirs.” I felt the weight shift on my back, then heard him ask someone, “Keep beating him up, I’ll take care of her then we’ll continue having our fun,” His voice was stern but I still heard some tones of him being carefree, he was enjoying this. He then addressed someone else, “Sounds good to you?” The answer consisted of muffled cries, attempts at screams that were cut off by hits then a gun cocking. With a sigh, the man on me pulled the gun away from my face and tutted the man who was bound on his knees.

I felt the weight leave my back but did not dare move, I stayed right where I was. Steps on the humid ground were heard, getting away from me but clearly approaching the man who I assumed was being tortured. The gun fired soon after, startling me as I tensed up and closed my eyes a few seconds before opening them again. The crazy man that put me on the ground laughed loudly, “Come on, it’s just the thigh, you can still walk for now, yeah?” He had said. Turning my head to look at them, I saw the older man on his knees, hands tied behind his back and suit bloody. His tie was undone, and he had wounds all over his face and chest. “I said you can walk, yeah?” Recognizing the voice, I could put a face to my aggressor as I watched him remove his glove before grabbing the victim by his arm and making him stand up, only to force him to wobble a bit. “See! I am being nice! Talk and it’s all over, come on.” He cooed in something that could be seen as sweet if it wasn’t happening in a warehouse with violent people and a man bleeding on the ground.

“I told you! I don’t know anything I-“ The man with the long earring in his left ear did not think twice before punching the office worker in the face with enough force. I believe I heard his nose crack. I caught a glimpse of the tattoos adorning his hands but could not decipher, from how far I was, what was written on them. The crazy man laughed after the punch, “Wrong answer! Haha, you have one last chance, ok?” He said, leaning over so that his face was at the same level as the other man’s. From my place on the ground, I could only see the wicked smile on his face, and it made me feel uneasy. The tall violent man was clearly crazy, having such a man roaming the city did not seem safe at all and it scared me to think of what else was happening in the shadows. “Alright, alright, please Reaper-“ The man he called Reaper gripped his chin tight and chuckled, “Straight to point, I don’t have time to waste on vermin like you, you’re no fun.” He said as a matter of fact, as if they both believed this. His face had turned serious so quickly that I feared the moment I felt like I could escape, he would change his mind in half a second.

The bleeding man nodded quickly, tears streaming down his cheeks, “It’s Silas&Sons—That’s the name of the firm that discovered something was off-'' While I was left in shock at the mention of the firm I worked at, the Reaper grinned and brought the gun to the man’s forehead, “Wasn’t hard, was it?” the man tried to tell him not to shoot, adding that the violent one had promised he would stop. The latter shook his head, “I said it’ll all be over! Listen carefully next time,” He said the last part like a parent berating their child then winked and pressed the trigger, killing the man in less than a second as his body hit the ground, blood spattering behind him. The man with black and blond hair looked at the body on the ground and chuckled to himself, “There won’t be a next time, but you get the jest.” He huffed with a wave of his hand before handing back the gun he had been given earlier. Turning around, his eyes locked on mine. I widened my eyes in pure terror and turned my face to be in the position he had left me in; I was aware he had seen me, but I was hoping he would not mention it.

The other people that were in the room had gone silent and were probably all looking at me, the woman lying on the floor, shaking, dreading for her life. The odds of me coming out of this unscathed seemed to be decreasing the more I observed what was happening around me. A stinging pain reached my scalp making me hiss, as someone lifted my head from the ground to make me look at them. While turning my head their way, I saw two men sitting on a crate, one with two braids that were long enough to go down to his ribcage while the other had shorter purple hair and glasses. Boredom adorned both their features alongside blood stains on their outfits, and yet they were nonchalant about it. I saw a man leaning behind another crate but barely managed to catch a glimpse of his tattoo that the man called Reaper snapped his fingers in front of me. “Here, I’m your tormentor, not them, yeah?” He grinned. Meeting his gaze again, I forced myself to keep my mouth shut and kept my eyes on him.

“You’re being courageous, not even crying yet! You’re a fun one, gotta love it.” He said happily, his hand patting the cheek that had taken most of the damage when he slammed me on the ground. I flinched when I saw his hand approach my face then winced at the rough touch against the bruising skin. “What will I do with you little rat? Eavesdropping ain’t nice, tattling ain’t it either.” The latter was said in a more serious tone as his expression turned somber, any humor that dripped from his words a moment ago was completely gone and he was now looking at me with caution. “Get up, come on.” I did not have a choice, the grip in my hair did not slacken and I had to follow his movement to avoid most of the pain. My clothes were dirty and damp from the humid ground; I felt my legs shake as I got to my feet and hissed at the pain when he yanked my hair for me to follow him quicker.

Pushing me forward, he threw me against the crate where the two other men were sitting. Hitting my shoulder against the wooden item, I swore under my breath and was about to fall to my knees again when the man with the long braids wrapped his legs around my neck and somewhat choked me. Caught off guard, I gripped his shins tight and tried to break free, but his hold only tightened. I heard him mock me while he dug his heels deeper in my biceps from the position he was in, “Stop moving and it’ll stop hurting, fuck you’re stupid.” He sighed with disdain, bringing me closer towards him but it only pressed my neck against the wood. Gritting my teeth, I stopped trying to get him to let go and let my arms fall to my side, when I felt the choke weaken and took a large intake of breath while focusing my eyes anywhere but on the man in front of me.

The manic laughter I had now heard many times in those few minutes I was on the floor reached my ears again, “I can see you wanna live, what are you willing to do to stay alive?” He asked in a light tone. It was a real question, but I did not want to do anything. I wanted to punch them and make a run for it, but they had guns and strength, none of which I could match in any way. I kept my mouth shut again.

The Reaper chuckled again, “I don’t know if you keeping your pretty mouth shut is a curse or a blessing-“ he stopped himself and slapped my now undamaged cheek with as much force as he could, making me yelp at the pain. I kept my face turned the direction his hand had turned it, but he gripped my chin forcefully and made me look at him. His expression had turned almost sour as he stared right into my eyes, “Fucking answer the question, what are you willing to do?” he spat, his face only breaths away from mine. Keeping a frown on, I uttered, “I wasn’t calling on you, there were people blocking another road-“ His mouth contorted into a smile once again as he pushed my face against the crate before letting go as he threw his hands in the air, and turned around on himself once, “She speaks! God it’s so entertaining to see you’re—Still. Not. Crying.” He gritted through his teeth the last three words before leaning over once again, his face very close to mine just like before.

“You’re telling me it’s a coincidence then?” He asked in a playful tone, clearly mocking me.

Fuck I wanted to make a run for it and get away from here. My heart was trying to beat out of my chest the longer I spent time here, the only thought running through my mind was: I am going to die here. How else would I end up? He had killed a man that had told him what he wanted to know, so no matter what I said he would kill me, right? Stammering a bit, I nodded the best I could with legs still around my neck, “Yes, I hadn’t seen you were here, I-“

“You’re funny! I’ll give you that! God you’re-“ He pulled back and made a rapid movement of his arms approaching me, as if putting me on display, “You’re fun! Ran, let her go.” The first part was said in excitement, the latter in the utmost seriousness. The moment he had spoken those words, the man let go of my neck and I was about to stumble when the Reaper grabbed me by the shoulders. He was tall, strangely tall, way above average, and it only added to all the traits that already made him scary. My whole body tensed, I thought this was it. He glared at me for a few moments before speaking to one of his friends, his gaze never leaving mine, “What do we know?”

An unknown voice reached my ear, it was close, so it must have been the other man on the crate, “Seems like a civilian, said she was an accountant. She also seemed surprised when the vermin said Silas&Son.” That perked the Reaper’s interest.

“Oh, so the little girl knows things. Have they sent you?” He asked, forcing me to look up by gripping my chin once more. He did not care the amount of strength he used, he couldn’t care less if I was uncomfortable, to him I was just a puppet that he could throw around and play with. Clearly he was right since I moved along and did not fight back. If I did, I would die, I was sure of it. “I was walking home from work—I saw my usual path was blocked and people were ganging up against a man so I-“ “You ran? The rat isn’t one for conflict, eh?” He patted my head and smiled almost reassuringly before letting go of me, making sure I fell on the floor. “Then? Make this quick, this ain’t the time for a bedtime story.”

“I called the police so that they could check—they said it was none of their business so I tried again and you-“ Fuck I was stuttering, the stress was too much and once I had fallen on my back, he was a lot more intimidating. He could just pull out his gun and shoot me, I could not get up with how I was shaking.

“You tried to do the right thing, right?” He asked, his back now turned to me. I could not gauge his emotion, so I replied sincerely, “Yes, it was all that I could do-“

Suddenly he turned around and pointed a gun at me, grinning, “Wrong! You could have helped the poor, poor man on the street, yeah? But you didn’t, why?” I did not reply right away, so he waved the gun around before crouching right in front of me and taking a good look at me. “They were too many-“ “That never stops a hero, does it? It’s all about charisma, determination, letting your body act faster than your brain, no?” He asked rhetorically, but while I waited for him to continue he sighed and looked down, his gun dropping lower as his arm fell limp. He started mumbling to himself a moment, using the gun to scratch his hair. Perhaps it was not the most adequate time to do so, but I looked at his outfit and saw he was wearing suit pants and a white business shirt. Quite the outfit for a murderer, but he had made sure to pull his sleeves up to not stain it. He was right in doing so since all the blood from earlier was on his black gloves and his forearms.

“Tell me, rat,” He slowly looked up and gave me a wicked smile, “Are you a hero?” He brought the gun to my forehead and all I did was close my eyes in fear. A sob escaped my lips as I tried to back away, but I was only met with the wooden crate, accidentally bumping my head against the shoes of one of the men sitting on it. “Do you believe there is good in this world? That it deserves to be saved? Hm? Would you die for this pathetic excuse of a world?” He pressed the gun even more against my skin. I heard the click as he disengaged the safety and tried to close my eyes even more than how I had already shut them, but found it impossible. My entire body was shaking, there was no helping the sobs escaping my mouth even by covering it.

I felt a gentle hand push my hand away and opened my eyes in confusion, only to see that the man who was holding a gun against me was grinning, “Answer the question.” He turned the gun horizontally and rested his arm on his knee as he placed his head on his free hand, completely relaxed. Getting lost in thoughts, I stared emptily at him while he started counting down, “Three…” Am I a hero? How would one describe a Hero? None of the mythological heroes could define me, none of those famous franchises either. “Two, think faster.” What answer did he want? Should I give him what he wants, or should I just be honest? “One-“

“I’m not a hero, I didn’t call right away because he deserved it, I-“ Taking a deep breath, I tried to take a hold of myself and calm down the best I could. “He harassed people, no one ever did anything about it-“

“See! Wasn’t hard, was it? Good girl,” He patted my head before moving the gun under my chin and raising it with the end of the gun, his finger never leaving the trigger, “You’re also a bad person then, you’re like us, right? Some people do deserve to die!”

Shuddering, I took a shaky breath and inhaled, “I’m nothing like you-“ “If he died it’s because ye didn’t act quick enough, don’t you agree?” He inquired with a pleading look, the mockery never leaving his tone. “I don’t, no.” My words were followed by the gun leaving my person as the man stood up quickly and barked out a laugh before asking his friends if they had heard that, they only grumbled in reply. He tucked the gun in the back of his pants and I quickly let my head down in fear I had triggered him somehow, frightened it was the straw that broke the camel’s back. “I like you, accountant woman. I just wanna see one thing to know what I should do with you—well two, but I’ll start slow.” Bringing his arm behind his back, I tensed again but then felt the gun hit my ankle as he threw it at me.

“Shoot me,” He ordered as he crouched in front of me, his arms crossed over his knees while grinning broadly. “I killed a guy, right? I am bad, killing me should make you a hero.” His little speech was stupid, it only started a vicious cycle of death with no end. Killing a killer that killed one person? It’d make me a killer that killed one person, and so on. But he brought his hand to mine and wrapped my fingers around the handle of the gun before pressing it against his forehead. “Here, you can’t miss from this close, show me you got guts! Come on, do it.” That grin turned into something scary, manic, he was getting off on the thrill. But my hands were shaking, I had never held a gun before, never intended to, but tonight was nothing if not exceptional. When I tried to put my arm down, he grabbed my elbow and kept it up, “It’s you or me, come on, make this fun for both of us-“ “I’m not shooting you in the head! You’re insane-“

Hearing my words well, he barked a laugh then guided the gun to his heart, one of the men behind me sighed and told him to hurry up, but the Reaper only shushed him. “Here, then? Sounds better?” Nothing was right in his head; I couldn’t understand what he was doing. No matter how hard I tried, I did not know the point he was making, but taking all this time to think about it made me lose the position of power he had given me. Forcing my hand to let go of the gun, he took it and, at the speed of light, put it in my mouth, making a sob escape it as he did so. “That’s a missed opportunity, too bad.” He shrugged then as I saw him press the trigger. I closed my eyes, my hands gripping my thighs so tight, it must have left some marks under the fabric of my pants.

The click of the trigger echoed, and I felt myself jump on the spot at how loud the bang was—so this is it? That thought crossed my mind rapidly, but was shoved aside by the loud ringing in my ears. I then heard footsteps echoing around the warehouse. The gun was no longer in my mouth, there were no bullets, it was a blank; I felt my stomach churn and opened my eyes in panic before pushing my tormentor away. I was surprised when he let me do so, but it was better for him. Slamming my hands down, I was on the floor as I emptied my stomach on the concrete. Chuckles reached my ears along with the whispers of a few words, “Can’t even stomach a bit of gun play.” “Should have killed her, blood stench leaves easier than vomit.” The latter comment made one of them laugh.

When I was done, I thought for a second that death was quick, most of the time. And when it wasn’t, you expected it, you weren’t filled with stress. Hence why no one ever spoke of post-mortem vomit. It made me laugh only for a second until I was pushed back on my ass when the man with the earring pressed his foot against my chest, making me wince. “Your name, what is it?” he asked seriously.

Feeling some sort of confidence build up, I looked up at him and leaned over, using the hem of his pants to wipe my mouth, but did not answer. The seriousness on his face turned into the look of someone who had been challenged; he snapped his fingers, then I heard someone say my name, my birthdate and my birthplace. Looking at the person who kept reading out loud, I saw the man with a tiger tattoo on his neck approach before tossing my wallet at me. I did not know when they had found the time to pickpocket me, but they managed to. My cheeks were burning up from the sickness, the stress and the embarrassment this entire situation brought but I still tried to keep my head high, for what it was worth. Bringing my hands to my face, I only now felt the tears that had rolled down my cheeks.

“Okay little tattletale, I think I’ll let you go for now-“ “Are you not going to kill me? Isn’t this what you do?” I asked in a weak voice, not even attempting to get up after all the time you had been mishandled. Both the man with the earring and the tattooed one were standing in front of me. The former reached out for my hand to help me get up, I did not take it, so he sighed loudly and bent over to grab my bicep and forcefully get me up. “We only kill snitches and annoying fucks, are you one of those?” I was about to tell him no when he leaned over suddenly and pressed his index against my lips to shut me up. Startled, I tried to step back but he held the back of my head with his free hand and beamed, “No, you’re not. You’re gonna be useful, you’re just the right amount of malleable,” The finger that had left my mouth moved to tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, I shivered in disgust, “I can see it in your eyes that you’ll be a fun one to work with.”

I tried to pull away from him, but his hand gripped my hair tight and kept me in place, stopping me from leaning back when he approached closer, “Since you’re not a hero, we’ll make you a villain then—I mean, it’s not going to be hard considering your stance on killing.” He grimaced at that before turning it into a full laugh and letting go of me.

“Rindou, take her back to her place-“ “I’m not doing that, I got plans with Ran. Send the tiger boy, we’re done for tonight.” The one with purple hair and glasses said as he hopped off the crate, followed by the other man on it. It made the Reaper’s face turn sour as he gripped the one who had just spoken and tightened his hold on his shoulder, “I don’t do escorting, that’s your job.” He gritted through his teeth.

Seeing the tension, I put my wallet back in my bag and cleared my throat, “I’ll—I can walk home on my own, by now they must be gone-“ All of them looked at me with a threatening gaze, I felt like a deer caught in headlights. The man with the braids started walking off, Ran was his name I believe, along with the man with the tattoo on the neck, while the two others stayed right there and glared at me. When I took a step back, taking their silence for permission, the Reaper wrapped his arm around my shoulders and held me close to him, “Right, I’ll do it tonight. Just because she’s a fun one-“ “I can walk home alone, it’s no problem,” I tried to push him away, my hands were shaky and had a few scraps. Without the constant manhandling, not that I missed it, I could feel the dampness of my clothes and how cold it was getting.

Looking down at me without any expression on his face, the Reaper turned us around and waved everyone goodbye, his arm never leaving my shoulders. “We both know that’s not true, if we let you walk home alone you might get beaten up by—how did you put it? ‘Gang members’, yeah, that was what you said on the phone.” He hummed, shoving his free hand in his pocket as he guided us outside. I felt uneasy in his hold, I felt like he was walking me towards my execution. I did not want to lead him to my house, but what choice did I have? He would find it sooner or later; at least that’s what he said, but I did not know how much truth there was to it. In my eyes, it was but a small group of violent men that had killed someone.

“In the end you did get beaten up by a gang member, but it could’ve been worse.” He said lightheartedly as he stopped in front of a car. When I paused my steps and still did not look at him, simply waiting for his next move, I felt him grab my chin and turn my head towards him. My breath hitched in fear as I met his golden eyes. He seemed a bit bored now, but I couldn't care less how he felt, I wanted to bolt away from his touch. “You should disinfect that, and you’ll definitely bruise, but you probably have makeup or something to hide that.” He shrugged.

When he leaned over again, I brought my hands in front of me and closed my eyes to stop him from touching me, but I only heard him huffing a laugh next to my ear as he opened the door of the passenger seat. “Get in, I’ll drop you off.” Looking up at him, I blinked a few times then glanced at the inside of the car. I don’t know what I was expecting, something dirty, bloody, disgusting perhaps. But instead, it was perfectly clean, not a speck of dirt in sight. It looked like an expensive car, but perhaps it was just very clean, I did not know. Still unsure, I hesitantly got inside and was about to close the door but felt a certain strength holding it back. The man was leaning on the door and bent over to peek his head inside the car, thinking he needed something. I pressed myself more against the seat to let him grab what he wanted, but his hand reached for the belt and fastened it for me.

“Wouldn’t want you to escape—ah, I mean, safety first.” He said mockingly before winking and slamming the door shut. My hands found their way to the belt and held it tight as I watched him walk around the car. His steps were too big for me to make a run for it, he would catch up on me in no time, I was stuck with him. As he entered the vehicle and fastened his own seatbelt, he pointed at the glove box and handed me his gloves, “Put them back and hand me a wipe, tattletale.”

His craziness was a lot more toned down, for a second I wondered how many faces this man had. The one I was seeing right now was intimidating from how put together he seemed, the other one was scary from how unexpected his actions were. “Why aren’t you killing me?” I asked without looking at him, focused on pushing the gun out of the way inside the glove box and grabbing the little pack of wipes. Giving it to him, his brow was quirked, “Because you’re a good girl,” He grinned, wiping his hands as he continued, “No one would ever suspect you’re working with the likes of a gang. You’re gonna be useful and that’s all that matters, you should be thankful I didn’t kill you. I hate people who eavesdrop.” He said, as he shoved the wipe in the door compartment.

“I didn’t eavesdrop.” I muttered, looking outside the window when he started the car. The laugh that erupted out of nowhere scared me, making me tense again, I dared to look his way and saw his manic smile again. “So, you’re an accountant, pretty boring. You should be thrilled I chose you.” He said in a mix of pride and humor before increasing the volume of the music then drumming his fingers on the wheel. Thinking about his words some more, I glanced his way and lowered the volume, catching his attention as he looked me dead in the eyes. “What if I don’t want to work with you?” I asked, measuring my tone to not piss him off, it did not take a genius to understand this man was unstable and that I needed to tread lightly around him.

Even with as much care as I put in my voice, his reaction was sudden when he turned the wheel and stopped the car on the side of the road. Passing cars honked in annoyance but the man did not care one bit while I had slammed my hand on the dashboard to stop my head from hitting it. Insulting him under my breath, I looked up and saw he had placed his arms on the wheel, his left cheek resting on his forearm. “Then leave. Get out right now, nothing’s stopping you.”

“What’s stopping me is that you’ll kill me, or you’ll run me over, multiple times,” I could see the smile on his face was spreading, but he did not move. The condescendence in his lack of reaction, of action, annoyed me but at the same time frightened me, was he going to slam my head against the window? Against the dashboard? I did not know, but I continued, stammering this time from how nervous I was becoming, “My life is on the fucking line, that’s what’s holding me back.” I spat. My eyes had never left his, even as his smile turned into a grin and his slender fingers gripped the wheel tighter.

When he did not look away, I did. At the same time, I turned on the seat and fully looked ahead instead of facing him. A silence set for a moment then I heard the car start and the man sighed, content, “You’re smart to stay, you’re only alive because I can use you. If you had left, I’d have shot you and left you on the side of the road to die.” He said in a light tone. The words he had spoken had the same effect of a bullet; my guts took a hit without being truly hit. I did not have a choice at all, I was stuck working for a man I did not know without even knowing what I had to do.

His hand rose and I closed my eyes, flinching slightly, “Type in your address, tattletale.” With the little confidence that remained, I lifted my shaky hand and typed it in while telling him that I had a name. Then added, “You should use it. Maybe there is a name I can call you by?” I was not asking for his ID, nor anything specific, if he had a codename in his stupid gang or something like that I would go with it, but calling him Reaper in my head sounded idiotic. “Sorry doll, I think nark or snitch suits you a lot more.” He hummed a moment, throwing me a glance from the corner of his eyes as his hands moved on the wheel absent-mindedly. Huffing in annoyance, I placed my elbow against the window and rested my chin against my fist, thinking he was done. After all, why should I care what he called me? I should simply call him an asshole if he was so keen on calling me a snitch. Or perhaps I should live up to the title and do exactly that, tell the police.

A hand wrapped around my wrist and pulled me out of my daydream with my head bumped against the window. Wincing in pain, I heard the man laugh loudly while being focused on the road, “That’s deserved for not paying attention.” He said through laughter. “Pay attention to what? The road? I’m not the one driving-“ “To me, you should keep your guard up, snitch. Who knows what I could do.” He said with a deadpan expression. Without looking at me, he brought his hand to tuck my hair out of the way, then glanced at me and smirked. His touch was light, almost gentle. It allowed me to get a proper look at his tattoo, but I could not focus on it at all, I only tensed up before feeling him grip my throat and bring me closer to him. I made a choking sound and complied to avoid as much pain as possible, “You can call me Hanma, as long as you don’t scream it from every fucking rooftop.”

I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. This night was not going as planned at all and every time I found any respite, it would be ruined, and the man would turn violent again. I could not let my guard down, I knew it but when he would just stay put, I could not help myself but think he was done. Clearly he wasn’t. His hold lessened a bit, so I took the opportunity to claw his hand away and pull myself back, my own hand around my throat in protection. “They called you the Reaper.” I croaked, wanting him to talk more so that I wouldn’t have to.

“They did, yeah.” He shrugged.

That was it. He did not add anything else. The matter was closed. When I asked him why they did that, he pulled the car on the side of the road again, startling me in the process. With how on edge I was, I did not realize where we were and thought he would be mad again, but instead he looked over my shoulder and nodded, “That’s you, get out.” He told me as his left arm rested on the wheel while the right one was on the back of the seat, casually leaning on it while looking at me. Looking behind me, I saw my house and felt some hope at finally being able to get home and yet… I did not leave right away and instead prodded, “The news talks about your gang, how many people did you kill?” His eyes traveled from my head to my hands then up to my head again, the arrogance never leaving his face as he leaned back against the car door and waved a hand dismissively, “Take a guess, I think it should be fun.”

I was about to give him a number when he leaned forward quickly, his face right in front of mine as he whispered, “Don’t forget those in comas or those at the hospital, they might not be dead, but they might as well be,” He chuckled happily then approached even closer, his lips right next to my ear, “They’re only alive because I said they could be, like you are. One wrong move and,” leaning back quickly, he clapped his hands, “Bang, dead.” He said dead meaning those in the hospital, but I fully understood he was threatening me, I was not an idiot.

Taking this as my cue to go, I unbuckled my seatbelt and when I was about to open the door, I heard the mechanism of the car locking it. Turning around to look at Hanma, I wordlessly asked if he needed anything else. His hand reached out towards me, “Your phone.”

“I didn’t record this or anything, I was not on a call with the police either, I-“ snatching it from my hand while I was rambling, Hanma tried to unlock it but instead was met with a locked screen. Hesitantly, I took it from his hand, mine being a lot shakier than his seeing how steady his were and unlocked it before giving it back to him. A minute passed and he handed the phone back to me, “We’ll be in contact. Things are gonna change for you, doll. Hope you’re ready for what’s coming.”

He was an unusual character, he was confusing, violent, and surely insane. All of those things added up in my mind, making me accidentally let it slip, “How can one be ready with you? Crazy man…” I said it all under my breath and huffed the last part as I pushed the door open. I let out a sigh when the door opened easily, part of me even thanked the man for not keeping me in any longer but I was still on my toes, certain he would say something else as I left the car, but he did not.

Grabbing my bag, I shuffled away from the car that still hadn’t moved and kept glancing over my shoulders until I reached the door where I struggled to put the key in the keyhole. At each failed attempt my frustration grew, the swears flooded out of my mouth easily and soon it turned into a stupid crying of frustration. “Fuck this, fucking shit-“ when the key finally fit, I hurried inside and locked the door behind me again but this time with the sliding lock, knowing full well I would struggle again too much to lock my door with the key seeing how tensed I still was.

The darkness of my home was what welcomed me. It was awful, it was cold and above everything it felt oppressive—my face was heating up, I was suffocating, my clothes were burning my skin, but I was also shaking. Fanning my face, I made my way to the bathroom with heavy steps, my breath was quickening, was it breathing or heaving? I needed to calm down, I needed to ground myself but I did not know how, this never happened but I felt like I was dying. I could not breathe, my lungs hurt at each intake of breath. “Fuck, fuck, shit, calm down“ I panted while taking off my clothes, I needed to take everything off, I wanted to burn them, it was filthy, disgusting and smelled wretched.

As I took off my top, I caught a whiff of the stench of the warehouse and let out a sob but did not let it stop me even if I could not breathe. I removed the rest of my clothes and knelt by the bath, leaning over to turn the shower on but did not wait for it to be warm to step inside and let it pour all over my dirtied body. The coldness made me take a deep breath that seemed to have helped with the panic attack I was having, but it did not help the crying, so I let it all out while I was washing up. What have I gotten myself into? What happens next? What am I supposed to do now? Is he going to ask me to kill someone? Am I going to have to use a gun? I didn’t want to do any of those, I only walked by something I had nothing to do with and—letting out a scream of frustration, I sat down in the bath and let the water rain on me. I ran my hands through my wet hair and placed my elbows on my knees, grunting again, “I don’t do gangs… I do numbers, I don’t have time to murder people…” I mumbled.

Letting my own words sink in, I let out a chuckle at first and focused my gaze on the wall in front of me then laughed again, shortly. I don’t have time to murder people, yeah… “Because if you had time you would?” I asked myself jokingly as I stood up, laughing again. Shaking my head, I shut the shower off and got out, almost slipping on the water that had splattered around the bath. I hadn’t taken time to put a towel on the floor or prepare anything, fortunately I managed to balance myself and took one from the closet. Once I was dry, I wrapped my robe around my form and stopped in front of the mirror, taking a proper look at the damage I had taken.

The scratch on my cheekbone was bruised, there was another bruise on my neck that I could probably hide with a turtleneck, the season allowed it, and if not with a turtleneck then a scarf would do the trick. Disrobing myself just to take a look at the rest of it, I had some bruises on my arms where I was grabbed to be moved roughly, without counting the pain on my ass but no one would see that. Passing my tongue over my teeth, I was glad as I still had all of them, but my jaw hurt, “Did I bite the inside of my cheek? At what moment could-“ A flashback of when the man slapped me with full force appeared in my mind, fueling me with a bad feeling of uneasiness as I put back my robe. “Bastard…” I huffed before opening the door of my bathroom and stepping inside the dark room again. Talking to myself, I continued, “Nothing’s stopping me from telling the police, who does he think he is? I could very well call them, yeah…” I paused in my steps and scoffed dryly, “Not that they’d listen.”

The news was always talking about the gangs in the city, telling us that the police were working on stopping them, but no one knew the people that were supposed to defend and help were a bunch of sellouts, bribed out idiots. The system we had put our trust in had decided to fuck us over and to leave us to ourselves, it was because of them that I was in this situation. It’s not like it had been hard to stumble upon one of their gang meetings. They might claim discretion, but if anyone could find them, it was anything but. “Who am I kidding? I am fucked,” I barked a laugh and turned on the light, “Guess I am a gang member-“ I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw the man my thoughts were plagued with, sitting on my couch, his legs crossed with one ankle over a knee. “Not exactly, you still need to prove yourself. But I love the enthusiasm!” He said while placing an arm on the back of the couch and looking at me with a satisfied smile, not even fully facing me, only to look right ahead once he was done talking.

Usually, one would say don’t turn your back on your enemy, but he was the predator here, he had nothing to fear, I was the one shaking in my metaphorical boots. Deciding to not be useless, I was about to shuffle to the kitchen discretely when I saw him beckon me closer by bending his index finger. Thinking I could play it off as not having seen it, I took one step towards the kitchen when I heard him click his tongue over his teeth, “I said, come here.” Stopping dead in my tracks, I did not speak, and silently opened my bag to pull out my phone and start recording. His hand gripped the back of the couch and I heard him chuckle mockingly, “Ran said you were stupid, but we both know you’re not, now come.” Putting the phone properly on the furniture, I followed his order and walked up to him to stand right in front of him, my arms crossed over my chest to close my bathrobe up to my neck.

“How the fuck did you get in?” I spat. He was not driving, which meant he could not throw me out of a speeding car. He was not surrounded by other maniacs either, and if he had a gun and decided to shoot me, I would have proof of it. There was a semblance of safety, even amidst the fact that the man had broken in without caring. It led me to have some confidence.

The man grinned and leaned over, his elbows resting on his knees. His demeanor was one of a man in control, he knew he could do anything to me because I would bend, he said it himself, I was malleable. But not for lack of will, simply by fear. And if he kept bending me this much, I would not last long, I would break. As long as I feared him, he had the upper hand… but I was not feeling fearless yet. With a low chuckle, he simply said, “Broke in with pliers,” then showed me the pair of pliers lying on the couch. I glanced at my door and saw the chain of my lock was broken as he had said, but that loss of attention directed to him annoyed him. Snapping his fingers, he brought my attention back to him, “Here, you should make a double of your key-“ “I’m not doing that. First, you’ll pay me back for breaking my lock, then if you want to meet up for whatever you got planned for me, you pick a spot but not-“

My breath hitched when Hanma rapidly stood up, his form towering mine as he looked down at me with his hair falling randomly on his forehead. “We got a lotta confidence suddenly, don’t we? Go ahead, finish your sentence, I’m listening.” He cooed in a condescending tone, his face approaching mine as he hovered slightly over me. Looking up at him, I looked down to his chest feeling my confidence wane slightly. When I tried to step back, not liking how close he was to me, he placed his hand on my shoulder to stop me. “Come on partner, let it all out, you seem to have a lot on your mind. Keeping it all bottled up ain’t gonna end up well. We should get along if we’re gonna work together, yeah?” He said in a fake listening attitude, we both knew he didn’t care but I was riled up and clenched my fists.

“I don’t want you in my house, you’re a piece of shit. I don’t want to get along, I want you to fuck off—Get out.” I managed to say everything without stuttering, but his grip tightened on my shoulder, making me tense up even if it was not painfully tight. Simply knowing that nothing was holding him back, not his mind, nor his ethics, nothing. His mood was the turning point of his actions, which means one change of emotion could make him go feral and hit me, it scared me. Hissing mockingly, he tilted my chin up to make me look at him, a smirk adorning his face, “Make me leave then, do something about it.” Grabbing both my shoulders, he pushed me back slightly then spread his arms wide, a huge smile on his face, “Go ahead, I won’t do anything—it’s free hits,” He taunted. When I did not move, he pointed at his face and licked his lips like an animal looking at its next meal.

“Do it, show me your guts, little rat! I hit you right? I put a gun to your head, that must be so annoying, right?” Biting the inside of my cheek, I could feel my frustration building up inside me again. He had done all those things, and no regret was written on his face, none. He had killed a man, broken inside my house, manhandled me and hit me. He had mocked me, humiliated me, mistreated me and while it all happened in a short time span, I already felt strongly about him. Reminding myself all that, I hadn’t realized the hit that flew from my person until it landed on his jaw, my fist feeling like it had hit a wall. His face turned to the side by the end of the action.

Using the heel of his hand to wipe the blood that dripped from his mouth, he looked at me with hooded eyes and grinned, his teeth colored red, “That’s hot, but ye shouldn’t have done that.”

[Part 2]

[henqtic]

Can you do a draco x reader with us watching a film and reader saying how they’re crushing over a certain character

𝘭𝘦𝘰’𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘦

pairing: draco malfoy x fem!reader

word count: 1.6k (1674)

authors note: just pretend that the battle of hogwarts never happened— that event ruins everything :/ and thanks for requesting !! it made me get a lot more inspiration to finish my other wips <3

masterlist. // taglist form. // request more works.

—————————

the room smelled of freshly buttered popcorn, soft drinks, and unhealthy snacks and for the same reason the night celebration was in place, strong mint gum. tonight was cleared, a time for you and draco to just relax, cuddle up within each other and have a break from everything going around.

the years after graduating a boarding school were life changing, even wizards themselves who could conjure up almost anything they’d ever want or possibly dream of but still, it was the time of realization for who and what you wanted to be.

and yes, there were the newts but they didn’t help much once you really got a look into the real world. many had found a passion in something that seemed wondrous— more fun. traveling and exploring the world, maybe even discovering more mystical creatures that hadn’t been learned in a simple care of magical creatures class and weren't seen in their own time because their parents didn't have the resources.

and some were set on everything but those test scores, a family business awaiting their sole airs take over and draco well, he was a part of that some. and surprisingly enough, even after all that time and all of those expectations set on him to live up to and stay in his family standard, he didn’t, and it was much to your encouragement.

his interest in healing sprung up in his last year of schooling coming to the conclusion that he’d been a prejudiced bully— not that he hadn’t already known that but, of course he did. but once he was left with less than five friends and a girlfriend who was steadily distancing herself further and further away from him, it set in.

so that’s where it started, him identifying nearly all of his mistakes and attempting to heal what had been broken relationships— which most never really did. but it was a change, and a good one at that, it brought him an inner joy, not for the factor of him getting things out of it like you wanting to be in his company more often but that he was mending the seemingly unfixable things.

it made him want to do that and not run a stuffy business that didn't do much but treat their workers poorly and customers even worse so he turned to medicine. observing how so many things lined up with potions, adding the right amount of this, and crushing that up the right way, to make a final product. a product that would soon heal the injured and bring a great smile to both of their faces.

but what he hadn’t realized was that being a healer took time and hard work— almost unusual to someone like him, being constantly handled things and easy ways out but with this, there was no fast tracking or getting anywhere if you didn’t have the right skill set or talents.

so to say he wasn’t ready for it would be a wrong statement. but to say he was exhausted, completely drained of all energy would be completely right. even after all of your cheering on, reminding him that it was only a few more months of studying and one big more test until he’d get to know if he earned his title of healer malfoy.

and usually, that worked, but after tonight after taking that so called big test, his mind was racked with anxiousness. if he didn’t pass, his father would be on his back, telling him how it was a waste of money and how he should've listened to him to that you’d even be disappointed in him— unlikely but as said before, there was nothing but anxious thoughts and anxious scenarios coming through.

so it was painfully clear that your natural remedies wouldn’t work, countless amount of neck kisses and back rubs and muscle soothing not sufficing so you both agreed on the last thing you couldn’t think about, a simple night with the television on, just in each other’s company to try and get his mind off of things—

“you said this was a muggle film, correct?” he called out for confirmation, eyeing the packaging of the movie you called.. the titanic?

“mhm, one of my favorite movies, i just know you’ll love it,” you said from the other side of the living room with a wide smile on your face, near close to beating a cheshire cats. the movie itself was beautiful, you couldn’t lie, the directing and acting brought tears to your eyes almost every time you watched it.

but there was ‘something’ else that could bring tears to your eyes, a gazing stare at the screen whenever his parts would come on.

draco handed you the plastic, allowing you to remove the disk and insert it into the dvd player. you quickly made your way back into the make shift bed made out of blankets and pillows and once the black screen turned green, copyrighted warnings started, you tucked yourself into his awaiting arms.

“why’d you say you loved this again?” he asked for the second time, limbs wrapped around your body as you searched for a response.

“umm, really eye catching.”

and yeah, of course, you were comfortable with him, growing up going to the same school for months at a time and then dating for a good fraction of those years. there was also the memory of a night where you two tirelessly played a game of dare or dare, multitudes of dares coming both your ways to say the most embarrassing, weird, or even azkaban worthy things you’ve done.

but it was something else telling him that you were crushing over a fictional character— who wasn’t even that since the story was true but you were crushing on the actor of that said fictional character that you had no chance with and that, well it was something better left unsaid.

and as it went on, he could see that too, the way your eyes were stuck onto the screen the other blonde was in frame— on the break of amusing how’d the only time your attention would shift is when he’d reach you another piece of popcorn, you offering a grateful smile before focusing back.

your mouth was slightly agape, opening for another piece just how the rhythm had been going, him eating one, him feeding you one, him eating one and so on but now he was beating it further and further away from before your body eventually gave up, falling on his chest.

“hey, why’d you that?” you groaned, annoyed that you were now looking at him from below instead of watching the film.

“why’d you say you picked this again?” his eyes were narrowed down at you, a sly smirk in place. you moved around, trying to remember your excuse and hide the growing smile arising to your face.

“I already told you, it’s eye catching.”

“no,no,no, who’s eye catching?” he asked again, this time correcting himself in order to get a more truthful response. you let out a half embarrassed, half astonished laugh before answering—

“if i tell you, you can’t laugh.” all he did was raise his eyebrows at you, positioning you on his lap, signaling for you to go on with two taps of his finger on your thighs.

“okay well—” you paused, a loss of words and a huff following, “all i’m saying is if jack were to run me over... i’d be the one to apologize.”

your tone of seriousness only made the barks of laughter from the boy underneath you louder, a small pout coming on your face as a response trying to not end up laughing at yourself—

“jack, are you serious? he’s one of the most basic people i’ve seen,” he said through breaths of air, slight tones of jealousy coming out making your head turn in feign sympathy.

“you do know that i’m dating you, right?”

“yea and what’s that supposed to mean?”

“your eyes are blue and hair is blonde and you’re the typical skinny wh—” you started, responding to his defensiveness in the best way possible.

“it sounds like you’re just describing him.” point completely missed. “and so what, what could a fictional character do for you that i couldn’t?” he asked with a smirk, your face saying nothing but unfazed and unamused.

“fine even though if you were listening you'd know that he’s not completely fictional, but everything. would you ever go down with me on an unsinkable ship and then let me survive only the door we could find?” you asked, sighing after like it’d been a dream of yours.

“no. love, take this as me caring for you but i don’t think we’d sink on an unsinkable ship— it’s in the name.”

“were you not listening? and stop, it’s romantic, don’t ruin this for me,” you scolded, lightly hitting his arm.

“they both could’ve gotten on, jack just wasn’t the brightest. and would you really rather date someone that daft over me?” his nose scrunched to further show his disgust, your scoff not failing to sound after.

“know what, if you were a fictional character, no one would like you.”

“sure, i bet i’d have at least two hundred of you treating me like him.” the smugness in his tone was apparent than ever. you loved him, more than anything in the world but, he wasn’t much compared to jack dawson. 

and then came the other obstacle, there not being a valid way to prove to someone like him, with such an inflated ego that no one would like a fictional character version of him. and when you repeated that, he was extremely butt hurt, still allowing his arms to reopen for you to snuggle back in.

single moments passed, another film starting to ease the argument before he spitefully grumbled, “i’d have people all over me.”

“no you wouldn’t!” you whisper shouted back tilting your head up to see his pouting face. 

“yes I would, don’t doubt me—”

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[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Avenger Things - Bucky Barnes x powered (f)reader

Summary: You’re just trying to make it through the day without breaking anything, or anyone.

Warning: language, fluff, bit of nonesense

Masterlist

Practically limping into the Avengers large kitchen you couldn’t believe how sore you were from, well, let’s just say you’re not entirely so sure. What you do know is that it’s the morning after a stealth mission and your more beastly self, if that’s even the correct term, must have done or gotten into something last night that might have knocked you out cold. 

Hence the memory loss.

Honestly you could laugh, it’s like trying to figure out what drunk you was getting themselves into. Problem is, this “drunk you” at the time was 2.4lb of absolute raging adrenaline with an apparent lack of safety awareness and good judgment skills. 

Not a good combination. Also you were a hawk.

So here you are, piecing together the jumbled puzzle of last night while you make an attempt at finding breakfast before the crowds come noisily shuffling into the temporarily quiet hang out room slash luxurious kitchen, of the famous Avengers Facility. Ah, the life of an Avenger who’s fantastical ability allows them to shift into any animal in existence.

Although it’s a blessing, you sometimes suffer the consequences of being an actual avenger, and shit, your left shoulder and rib cage are so sore right now you could scream. Your accelerated healing has already kicked in but alas that does not mean your body will spare you some soreness and bruising.

“Fuck what did I do?” You mutter grumpily while reaching for the fridge door handle, making certain not to pull to hard for fear of ripping the metal right off.

Soon your eyes scan over the multitude of various healthy snacks and equally as healthy leftovers due to Steve’s insistent attitude towards fueling yourselves with the best, to be the best or some cheesy hero shit like that.

Spotting your left over hidden burrito in the back of the fridge sends an excited thrill into your otherwise tired and achy self, you snatch it up quickly, and without thinking pull the metal door off its hinges while quickly trying to close it.

Shit.

Tossing the burrito onto the nearby counter top, you swiftly grasp the large food filled door with both hands as you hold it up with ease. Well this is just a fantastic situation isn’t it? Apparently you’re incapable of having an easy morning like just previously planned. Wait are those footsteps?

“You know, you can just have Tony buy you a mini fridge for your room.” Quips Sam with an amused chuckle as you quickly snap your head over to the startling sound. “I think he could afford it.” 

Your eyes widen in surprise before narrowing in annoyance at his happily smirking face, Bucky and Vision right behind him to your great pissed-off-ness. “Fuck off I didn’t mean to do....this.” But of course it happens to me.

Eyeing you up with a face that practically says “I know but this is hilarious” Sam nods before sitting down on the bar’s stool, Vision coming to your aid as he phases through the counter to take the fridge door out of your hands.

“Thanks Vis.” You mutter with an appreciative nod.

Setting down the door onto the floor, Vision turns to greet you, “No problem Y/N, it appears you needed the help, I’ll just um....go inform Tony of this....fridge.” He says before turning to leave out the way he came. Guess he’s not one for awkward situations.

Watching him go you suddenly glare down at the two whispering Avengers seated in front of you on the other side of the counter, “Thanks for helping assholes.” You growl unenthusiastically, reaching into the fridge to pick up a water bottle.

“Oh doll, we would have helped you.” Assures Bucky with a kind smile as you force yourself to keep a stoic face. “Vision seemed to handle it pretty well on his own.”

“Yeah well now this fucking fridge is broken and I still feel sore.” You complain with a sneer as Bucky and Sam share a chuckle.

“What?” Laughs Sam, “Don’t tell me you both?....and after the mission too?” He implies with raised brows as you send him the most done-with-your-shit face you can muster.

Sensing your growing irritation, Bucky speaks up, “No, no....definitely not that..it was the mission.”

“Oh shit you’re right.” Realizes Sam as you roll your eyes at him, let’s just say that last mission was a rough ending one. Also you can’t remember much after shifting into a hawk, seeing some bright lights and then...

“Yes.” You grumble, “and I’ve come to the thrilling conclusion that I must have gotten hit by a car......so that’s fun.” You mutter with as much enthusiasm as a stick, causing both Bucky and Sam to begin laughing again. What the hell is so funny?

Listening to them lose it inevitably causes you to start chuckling which in turn causes your ribs to shoot with a hot flaring pain. Holding your injured side you use your other hand to pound against the marble table, “Stop laughing this shit hurts and neither of you dumbfucks are helping.” You grumble half-heartedly.

“Alright.” Says Bucky standing up, “Come on doll let’s get outta here and get a heating pad on that tire mark under your shirt.” He adds sarcastically with another laugh.

Letting out a quick snort you shake your head at his handsome face, “Okay smartass I’ll let that one slide.”

He smirks at your good humored reaction and admittedly adorable messy hair, “I’m thinking we get cozy, watch that weird pirate movie you like with the Sparrow guy, and then see where it takes us.” Suggests Bucky with a lazy smile as he stretches his arm causing his shirt to rise up and reveal a bit of toned tummy.

Sam whines, “What? We have sparring at three this afternoon and you’re gonna leave me hanging for Miss. Grouchy-pants over here?” Points out Sam to Bucky as you cross your hands over your chest while raising a brow.

“Yup.” Quips Bucky with a shrug.

Sam blinks, “Unbelievable.”

“I like Y/N more.”

“You suck and I need a new sparring partner now.”

“Just ask Steve or Nat.” You suggest, not caring much for Sam’s problems at the moment.

“No they’re hard-core and mean.”

“Spar with Clint then.” Adds Bucky.

“No he cheap shots.”

“And I got hit by a car last night we all got problems.” You sass, gaining their distracted attentions once again. “Try and steal Bucky from me and I will make sure you remember what getting a wet towel slapped across your ass feels like.”

“Very specific and greatly noted Y/N. He’s all yours.” Says Sam while raising his hands defensively, “By the way you look rather stunning today did I mention that yet?”

“Don’t press your luck bird boy I’m not known to be very forgiving.”

“Clearly.” Jabs Sam under his breath while you take a swig of water, though you’re increased hearing enables you to catch that loud and clear.

After twisting the cap back on you immediately chuck it at his head, conveniently nailing him right in the temple causing him to yelp in surprise. “Jesus!” He shouts before falling off of the stool and onto the wooden floor below.

“Nope just me.” You deadpan with a satisfied smirk, walking over to Bucky while Sam gathers his bearings.

Bucky immediately throws an arm around you, making sure not to squeeze you too tight in the process. Leaning into his warm side, Sam throws you a half annoyed glare, showing how much he’d like to retaliate but also knowing he’s outnumbered in more ways then one.

“As much as I’d like to see you two beat each other’s ass right now.” Suddenly announces Steve, “We have a mission report in five.”

“What?” You sigh in annoyance, “Really? Right now? Can’t this shit wait?”

Steve sends you an apologetic smile, understanding you’re still in pain and thus very grouchy, “It’ll be quick. The team just needs to go over some credentials about the mission yesterday. Then you can go about your day off.”

Holding Bucky close, you pull him in a little closer, eyeing up Steve defensively, “Bucky too.”

Steve gives you an unsure look, “Well uh...”

“That wasn’t a question Rogers.” You growl, causing Steve to take a cautious step back as Sam lets out a chuckle.

“Yeah Cap I wouldn’t.”

“Right.” Nods Steve, “Yeah, you two are off the rest of the day after the meeting. Uh, see you guys then.” Waves the man with a plan himself, smartly deciding not to linger for much longer or face another steely glare from you.

“Fine. Let’s get this over with.” You mutter, parting from Bucky to lead the way down the hall to the usual meeting room.

——

After nudging Bucky to go on ahead to claim your unofficial official meeting chairs, you swung by your room to put on a sweatshirt and now are finally, though begrudgingly, making your merry way down the hall and into the expensive meeting room. 

Hood up, you trudge into the brightly lit area, practically squinting as the sunshine hits you like a blinding wall through the obnoxiously giant glass windows. “Nice of you to join us Y/N. Get lost on your way here?” Quips Clint as the whole entirety of the Avenger’s turn their heads to face you. 

“No, I just didn’t want to come.” You deadpan with a humored glare, earning a couple snickers from your friends. 

“Yeah that’s fair.” He shrugs.

Plopping yourself down in the facility’s decently comfortable swivel chair, you slouch tiredly, leaning your body against the arm rest to keep your bruised side from bothering you more then it already does.

Bucky is already in the seat to your left, Sam opting to snatch the one across from you two, while Vision and Wanda have claimed the seats to Sam’s right. Natasha and Steve sitting at the two chairs at the far end to your left, while Clint stands. 

“So...” Begins Clint, the apparent leader of todays meeting, “Yesterday’s mission in Quebec was a challenging one, I won’t lie to you. We took a hit, some more then others.” Nods Clint in your direction.

“You’re fucking hilarious.” You mutter, rolling your eyes in annoyance as Sam and Bucky hold in their laughter, while the others ignore the obvious implication, keeping it professional and in your good graces. 

“Thank you Y/N I know. Anyways, I think our team training days have improved our performance and been worthwhile. Now, as usual, Steve and Nat...great leadership skills. Vision, Wanda, the whatever the shit you guys are able to do, amazing...keep it up.” Clint glances back down at his notes while you yawn, “Sam and Bucky, nice recovery at the end, things where getting heated and you both really pulled through.”

“Hell yeah.” Smirks Sam as he leans over to fist bump Bucky from across the table.

Practically lowering yourself deeper into your seat, you mentally prepare yourself for whatever smartass comment you’re about to get from Clint. He looks down at his notes then moves to pick up a thin metal remote that connects to the blank screen behind him. 

“Uhh lets see here,” He mumbles while clicking some buttons that inevitably turn the screen on, “Okay good it works.” Swiveling around on his heal, Clint points the remote directly at you, “Y/N.” He says with a mischievous grin.

“Clint.” You point back in confusion, side eyeing Wanda nervously.

“Let’s talk...” Stretching out his arm, he clicks the remote to reveal a PowerPoint, “about safety awareness.”

Okay fuck you.

Chuckling tensely you shake your head, “I’d rather not.”

“Which is precisely why we...meaning you all,” Motions Clint to all of you with both his hands in two circles, “need to be educated on safety in the field.” A second later he flicks the lights off with a swift click of the remote, Okay great.....slide number one, do you have a buddy?”

As Clint keeps droning on and on for the next five minutes you suddenly decide to scoot over to rest your chin against Bucky’s right shoulder that's leaning against the table. He immediately smiles, turning his head away from an obliviously jabbering Clint, “Buck I’m going to commit a crime in the next two minutes if I don’t get the fuck out of here.” You whisper, squeezing his shoulder for emphasis.

Biting his lip to refrain from laughing, he reaches to take one of your hands with his, “And what crime will I have to admit in the police report?” He quietly muses.

“Murder.”

Kissing the pack of your hand to help you try and relax for the moment, he smirks, “Y/N it’s going to be difficult to break you out of jail.”

“Not if I don’t get caught.” You quip smartly while resting your head against his shoulder, “I’ve been contemplating taking out Clint since 2012 but then Natasha always stops me.”

“What’s stopping you now?” Challenges Bucky with the tiniest snort of amusement.

“Natasha.” You mutter, “Also I’m god-mother to one of his kids so I’m morally not allowed to kill him.....but I’ve never been more tempted then today.” 

“Shh.” Whispers Bucky with an amused smile as you roll your eyes, wanting nothing more then to leave this boring meeting. Fine, but if it was just me and Clint I would pummel his ass into the wall without a second thought, you think to yourself.

A moment later Wanda lets out a random snort of laughter that causes the team to look over at her in confusion while Clint is in the middle of explaining why it’s important to (make sure the enemy is knocked the fuck out before walking away). She quickly covers her mouth in embarrassment as Clint abruptly ends the PowerPoint, clicking back the lights on as he sighs in disappointment.

“Come on Wanda I was almost done.” He whines, setting a hand on his hip as she bites her lip to keep a straight face. Parting from Bucky, you move to lean yourself against the table top and listen to Clink complain. She looks down then glances over at you while Clint fumbles to turn the screen off. 

Oh, shit did she hear me say that?

“Sorry.” Mutters Wanda as you quickly realize you’re the reason she started to laugh, resulting in the abrupt ending of Clint’s 30 minute presentation. 

Giving her a quick wink, you quickly stand, causing your friends to look over at you, “Alright, good work team, we’re the best huh,” You add sarcastically before looking directly at Clint, “also Clint fantastic work at being the most interesting 87 year old, I’m thoroughly impressed you even know what a PowerPoint is. Kudos to you, I’m out.”

Before anyone can stop you, you’re already at the door, “Y/N you can’t just leave we’re only taking a break. And I already know how to use a PowerPoint.”

“Yeah and you also know how to put someone to sleep even without an arrow.” You sass while the others start to get up as well. 

“What? Guys, come on.” Complains Clint as Bucky almost trips shuffling quickly to the door.

“Babe I’m with you wait up.”

——

“So you really did get smacked by a truck. Who would’ve thought.” Mumbles Bucky humorously as the two of you lay sprawled out on your shared bed, a heating pad on your side as Bucky’s head lays on the corner of your right hip. His hands absentmindedly holding your right hand to his chest while your other one presses the heating pad to your ribs.

You lazily stare up at the ceiling while he studies your face, “I guess it makes sense since I can’t remember anything after that. I didn’t even see the damn hunk of moving metal coming either, so stupid.”

“No.” He assures softly, “We all fuck up and miss things sometimes. It happens to everyone.”

Smiling you simply roll your eyes, “Bucky you’re adorable but I, who was a hawk at the time....to be real here, got bitch slapped by a truck.”

“I’ve been thrown off a car a couple times actually.” He confirms with a shrug, “But yeah, you’re way tougher then me.” He finally chuckles.

“I’m tougher then everyone.”

Bucky smiles proudly, “Fuck yeah you are.”

[ethereal-bang]

mutual

Request: “maybe some hyunjin + mutual masturbation? bonus points if they’re ‘just friends’”

Characters: Hyunjin x female reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Type: Smut

Warnings: Mutual masturbation, dirty talk, slight dom themes

This is intended for mature audiences. Do not read if you are under the age of 18.

Okay, this was probably the stupidest decision you had made in awhile. Or rather, the stupidest decision Hyunjin had made that you agreed to. You knew the moment your best friend invited himself over to your apartment for a “movie night”, that there was something going on.

Hyunjin: hey are u busy 

You: I mean, not really ? It’s 9pm jinnie

Hyunjin: right ok cool I’m coming over

You: Wait, what? Why?

Hyunjin: you’ll see, be there in five

Your eyes bulge out of your head at his boldness. Regardless, you made sure your apartment was visitor friendly, even though you knew he wouldn’t care. Hyunjin has been your best friend since junior year of high school. Now into your second year of college, the two of you have been through pretty much everything. 

True to his word, five minutes later Hyunjin walked into your apartment and dramatically flopped onto your couch. You watched him while you walked into the living room, the blonde haired boy making himself comfortable before turning to you.

“Okay, so why do I have the pleasure of being graced with your presence at this time of night?” You asked, taking a seat next to him. He looked at you weirdly, he was hiding something. 

“Look. Just hear me out,” he starts, and alarms immediately go off in your head. “Hwang Hyunjin what did you do?” You ask him, eyes narrowing. Sticking his hands out defensively, he sits up right on the couch. “I didn’t do anything !! I just… so the boys and I were talking about movies today, yeah?” He started. Unsure of where this was going, and why you were involved, you nod your head slowly. 

“And there’s this movie, called 365 Days? Have you heard of it?” He asks cautiously.

Yeah, you had heard of it. It was the biggest trend going around right now. Some movie about a guy that meets a woman, kidnaps her and wants her to fall in love with him within a year, and if not she gets to leave. Everything you’ve heard about it has been a mix of cringe and intrigue. The movie is extremely dirty, you’ve heard. 

“Yeah, I’ve heard of it.” You say nonchalantly, waiting to see where the conversation takes you. “Ah, well, uh.. Ha-have you seen it?” He looks too embarrassed to look you in the eye. “No, I haven’t, Hyunjin. What does any of this have to do with me?” You question. Hyunjin shifts around in his spot on the couch. “Well, the boys..the b-boys dared me to watch it and I don’t want to watch it alone! Will you please watch it with me? Please?” He says quickly. Your eyes widen, not able to believe that this was the reason he was in your living room.

“Wouldn’t it be weird?!” 

“No! Y/N we’ve been friends for so long and it’s not like we’re not comfortable with each other!!” He reasons. “Hyunjin, it’s basically porn!” You laugh, unsure how to correctly convey your emotions. “Look, let’s watch like half of it. You know I can’t back down on a dare, Y/N please,” he begs. You weighed the options. Would it be weird? Maybe a little, but he’s right. You’re comfortable with him. What could go wrong, right? It’s just a movie. 

Sighing, you see his face light up in victory. “Fine,” you say and grab the remote, searching for the movie.

Oh boy, were you wrong.

This movie was way more sexual than you had originally thought. Yeah, you had heard the rumors about the infamous Boat Scene, where the main character finally gives in to her male kidnapper and they spend what seems like the entire day absolutely railing each other, but you didn’t think it would be this...graphic.

You were basically sitting on your couch watching softcore porn with your best friend. If someone had told you that this was how you would be spending your night, you’d laugh in their face. But here you are, sitting five feet apart from Hyunjin on the couch, both of you too afraid to make eye contact with each other as the two main characters have yet another round, this time on the front deck of the boat. 

You were definitely hot and bothered at this point, how could you not be? You tried to be subtle, shifting back and forth on the couch to try and relieve some of the pressure you were feeling between your thighs. You couldn’t wait for Hyunjin to get out of here so you could take care of it yourself, his presence not helping you in the slightest.

Hyunjin is hot, everyone knows it. His long hair dyed a platinum blonde and always kept in a ponytail, except for tonight he decided to let it hang down around him. You tried taking a glance at him, afraid he’d catch you staring and make the atmosphere even more awkward than it already was.

Hyunjin was having a hard time. Figuratively and literally. He had no clue this movie would be like this!! He heard the rumors just like you had, but he figured that everyone was over exaggerating, wanting to seem cool for watching a “raunchy movie”, but no, they were all spot on. And to make matters worse, he was watching it with you. He had no idea why he decided this would be a good idea. Maybe get some laughs at how terrible the movie is, and then turn it off and order takeout or something? He’s really not sure. But now all he’s thinking about is the fact that there is porn playing on your tv, and your shifting back and forth has not gone unnoticed by him.

Would it really be bad if he...initiated something? It was getting hard to control himself, he could feel his resolve slipping. He knows the movie is doing something to you too, it’s too obvious. Maybe acknowledging it will make the situation less awkward. 

Well, you never know till you find out.

Hyunjin can feel his heart beating fast in his chest as he takes a side glance at you. Your eyes are still glued to the screen, most likely due to embarrassment, but partially out of lust. He can see your pupils get larger slightly as you watch the scenes unfolding on tv. You shift your weight once more, and Hyunjin takes a deep breath as he turns to actually face you.

You feel Hyunjin look at you, and you immediately feel embarrassed when you meet his eyes.

Hyunjin almost backs out, but opts to look back at the tv because he cannot make eye contact with you right now. “Well, this movie is...something..” he says quietly, and your face heats up. “Yeah...sure is,” you trail off quietly, unsure what to say. How could he be having a conversation with you right now?

“Look...now just hear me out,” He starts. Those words got you into this predicament, you can only imagine where they’ll take you now. You can still hear the characters moaning on the screen, and you try to block them out and pay attention to Hyunjin. 

“We’re both sitting here incredibly turned on, am I wrong?” He starts. You go wide eyed, and the blush already on your cheeks darkens as you realize you weren’t being as discreet as you thought you were. “All I’m saying is, why don’t we...help each other out? I guess?” He says quickly, trying to make it sound like a stupid suggestion. You could clearly see his hard on through his sweat pants, and you thought about it.

“Have you heard of mutual masturbation?” you ask him. Hyunjin almost chokes at hearing those words even leave your mouth. He thought you were going to yell at him, push him out of your apartment and never want to speak to him again. You surprised yourself by being so forward, but it’s Hyunjin. It wouldn’t hurt.

“I..yeah, I have. Do..do you want to?” He asks, finally looking you in the eyes. Your gaze meets his, and the lust is evident in his eyes as he tries to discreetly check you out. This would change your friendship in a way that you would’ve never expected it to, but you don’t feel worried at all.

“You’re not gonna be weird about it afterwards, right? I mean, it’s not a big deal right?” You ask, and he shakes his head. “No! Not a big deal at all, as long as you’re not going to be w- oh, okay” he says, cutting himself off because you’ve now angled yourself in the corner of the couch to face him, your hands already ghosting the edge of your sleep shorts. You giggle as Hyunjin moves to do the same, and the sound is music to his ears.

Hyunjin sweeps his eyes over your form, and feels something spark in him. You look so small all the way over there, the giant tshirt you had on was not doing anything to help the sight. Hyunjin was starting to have ideas, and he decides that he wants to test the waters. 

Before he can even get to it though, you let out a little sigh as your fingers tease yourself over your underwear. “H-hyunjin.. Can you like, say something? Maybe?” You ask timidly. You can see the mood shift in his eyes as he smirks.

“Oh, you want me to talk dirty to you, huh?” He chuckles, and with the way your chest hitches, he knows he’s headed in the right direction. You blush and nod your head, embarrassed to say anything else.

Hyunjin is palming himself over his sweatpants, trying to keep pace with you. He watches as you relax into your own touch, and decides that he doesn’t want to hold back anymore.

Sliding his hands into his boxers, he sighs in relief at finally feeling something. “Do you feel good baby? Talk to me,” he tells you, and for some reason the new pet name sets you on fire. Following his lead you finally move your fingers past your panties, dragging circles along your clit and letting a soft moan slip past your lips. “Yes, God, so good” you moan. You look up at him and the feeling is magnified. 

His sweatpants have fallen a little low on his hips, and the sight of his hips and the muscles under his tshirt has you wanting to see more. Hyunjin notices you eyeing him, and decides to take his shirt off, throwing it on the floor next to the couch. He’s absolutely gorgeous, muscles flexing as he works himself up.

“Now don’t let me be the only one getting naked baby, let me really see you,” he says, and the tone is just between demanding and almost condescending. This new side to Hyunjin instantly makes you want to give in, and you’d do whatever he asked you to as long as you got to look at him like this.

You watch his eyes go wide when you take your shirt off, and you had almost forgotten that you weren’t even in your bra. Chest completely bare in front of him, he doesn’t take his eyes off you for a second as he slides his sweatpants down farther. You now have a perfect view of his cock, long and hard in his hand. This was one of the most beautiful sights you had ever seen. 

“Jesus fuck-” Hyunjin groans, his hand moving faster on his cock. You match his movements, getting yourself worked up. At this point you take your shorts off as well, the two of you completely naked, on opposite sides of the couch.

“You can take a few fingers for me, right doll? Show me what you do when no one’s around,” He says, fucking up into his hand. You bring your hand up to your mouth and slide your fingers in, putting on a show for him. His eyes never leave your face, and you’re glad he’s as affected by this as you are. 

You insert one finger into your core and your back arches, finally getting a taste of what you’ve been wanting so badly. Its nowhere near enough, you decide, and insert another finger. Hyunjin thinks that you look so, so pretty like this. He could sit for hours and just watch you, wouldn’t even need to touch you and he would be okay.

 Getting lost in your own pleasure, you let your thoughts travel to the boy on the couch across from you. You still couldn’t believe this was happening. All of the times you’ve ever gotten off to the thought of your best friend flash behind your eyelids, and it only brings you closer to the edge.

Hyunjin is almost there, too, and wants to make sure you cum before him, or at least at the same time as him. “F-fuck Y/N I’m so close. You can go a little faster for me, right baby? Make yourself feel good for me,” he says, and the request has you keening. “H-Hyunjin,” you moan out, letting the feeling completely take over as your reach down to rub circles on your clit, your orgasm approaching quickly.

“Just like that baby, maybe next time I’ll let you cum on my fingers instead,” he says, voice getting breathy as he approaches his high. “Oh God, Hyunjin please,” you beg, even though you’re not sure what you’re begging for at this point. 

It doesn’t take too much longer until the coil that was wound suddenly bursts, your orgasm taking over your senses. You lift your back off of the couch, whimpers coming from your mouth as you ride out your own orgasm. Watching you cum sets Hyunjin off, and he quickens his pace. Ribbons of white paint his  stomach and his hands, and the sounds that leave his lips, deep and gravely are almost enough to set you off again.

The two of you sit there, basking in the afterglow of your orgasms, the movie completely forgotten. The credits were rolling in the background now, and Hyunjin has completely forgotten about the dare he was supposed to be doing right now. You look over at Hyunjin, his skin glowing and just looking absolutely ethereal. Hyunjin is thinking the same, taking in the way your hair has gotten messed up from running your hands through it, and the slight sheen of sweat on your forehead.

It’s quiet for a moment, and you make your way closer to Hyunjin. His eyes widen as you get closer. Opting to lean in close to him, you whisper in his ear.

“So.. are you gonna let me cum on your fingers now?” you tease.

And he does. And on his tongue, too. Y’know, for good measure.

________________________________________________________________

Masterlist

[semi-imaginary-place]

I started talking on discord about the rebuild of evangelion movies with some people so you are getting the same text wall as before just said in a slightly different way. I sadly can’t guarantee this is more coherent than the previous walls of text:

i just finished watching the evangelion rebuild movies and now im chewing on furniture like a dog. evangelion rebuild really be like: maybe touching grass would fix you. maybe if you touched grass you wouldn’t be like this. still going feral here. i started watching 3.0+1.0 at like 10 pm and didnt finish it until 3am

yes i really enjoyed the movies. i was rather confused how much world building the 2 continuities shared because they seem to share some parts but not others. overall an excellent experience. most of the changes i am in favor of. By different worldbuilding i meant how adam(s), angels, the seeds of life/wisdom all mean different things and have different relationship depending on the continuity. or how the whole second impact was different, in the anime it was contact with the one and only adam sealed in their egg in antarctica where as in rebuild there were 4 adams. and in the anime both angels and evas are made from adam (except 01) where as in rebuild there isn't that a direct connection angels are just prophesied. so what units 01 and 13 are doing is becoming adams/gods where as gods in the anime was probably referring to the first ancestral race. there's also stuff like how kaworu is only an angel in rebuild where as in the anime he's adam's soul shoved into a lilin body and the anime makes it clear that angel is an arbitrary label that nerv is using as propaganda to designate an enemy. there also doesn't seem to need to be the pilot's mother's soul fused to the eva, more just any soul in rebuild. there's various other small things but it meant i'd interpret a scene one way based on knowledge of the anime and then 5 minutes later have to rewatch it because woops i need to see it under a new perspective. confusing to constantly be analyzing what's shared and what's different worldbuilding wise. but its inline with rebuild's themes of this is all fictional and the story (and worldbuilding) belong to the audience so i do applaud the movies for pulling this off. The simpler remade worldbuilding makes rebuild accessible to new people and it makes the movies able to stand on their own with out 15 books of supplementary material.

rebuild went very post modernism with emphasis on how the interpretation by the audience forms the reality of the fiction, the acknowledgement of the characters that they are fictional. so it leans into the meta and takes the audience out of suspension of disbelief purposefully to remind us this is fiction. and this shift is reflected in moving the focus away from worldbuilding. on a conceptual level i don't think either concept is inferior. personally im a sucker for worldbuilding so that part of the 1995 anime appeals to me. however from an execution stand point rebuild did a far better job, not only with this theme but all of its other themes too. the 1995 anime was successful in delivering its themes too but wow was there so much other stuff in between to get through. Not to mention the actual production meltdown that gave us the infamous powerpoint slide show presentation. In the anime halfway through they just gave up on making events comprehensible and it was big shinji depression times for the rest of the show

the 1995 anime was really weird about women and it always felt really slimy having the female characters be defined by their relationships to the male characters, the strange obsession with pregnancy and a woman's reproductive capabilities and i am so happy rebuild toned that all down. while motherhood continues as a recurring theme its focus is shifted to human connection and family and like caring for one another instead of all the weird bullshit and impregnation metaphors like when gendo implants the adam fetus on his hand and sticking it in rei3 to fuse into one being and start instrumentality.

the shinji gendo fight very much was about the fictionality of the movie. the animation of the evas always made them bouncy and massive like they have a lot of mass but in this scene thye used live action capture so it looked like actors in costumes on set with a miniature town and then shinji crashes into the backdrop/greenscreen and oh they actually are on a set. big YES to the final "fight" of the big mecha action series being two emotionally stunted dudes having a heart to heart and talking it out (Even if i do not care about whatever comes out of gendo's mouth).

rebuild is more direct in its themes than the anime. in the anime shinji only really starts understanding right in the final scenes of end of evangelion that connecting and building relationships is extremely hard but worth it. the omedetou scene doesn't count because no one understood it. where as rebuild it happens in the middle of 3.0+1.0 so shinji has the rest of the movie to talk about how even though you can never truly know another person, its only as an individuals that we can get to know and compliment each other and that process is worth it. Everyone carries their own pain, its not just you. you are not alone. and the solution to pain and loneliness is reaching out to others about their pain and loneliness.

yeh... yeah idk what to make of the timeloops kaworu's been going through. there's so much massive unexplored potential. this and the time between the near third impact and the actual third impact we are teased and hinted at so much but shown like 5 lines. i remember like a decade ago (before i got into eva) when people were losing their shit over that one line in 3.0 where kaworu implies he's been on a journey through the multiverse to find a timeline and make shinji happy. and i mean anno more or less gave his creative blessing to derivative works with 3.0+1,0. but yeah interesting that it is shinji and the characters and evas as concepts that bind the timelines and multiverse together, it's not a shared history with diverging timeslines. I could say that evas are everyone's secret dead twin from the mirror universe that have crossed over and make asuka a talking dog and anno says that just as true an evangelion story a what was actually published. and the implication with the timeloops that by writing shinji’s name next to his in the book of life, kaworu made them and the other major character the constants in the multiverse, not the adams or the angels or any of the worldbuilding or the backstories of the characters. It's just them, the people holding the timelines together.

anyways i really liked rebuilt. I watched the 1995 anime a few years ago just because i was curious to see what all the hype was about and it was ok but i enjoyed thinking about it and reading wiki articles more than i actually enjoyed watching the series. but i actually really enjoyed watching the movies, it was fun, it was engaging, they're good movies. They’re Good Movies!

rebuild also adds environmentalist themes. in ... 2.0? when they visit the marine animal refuge laboratory the question of humanity's role is destroying, preserving, and rehabilitating natural systems comes up. stewardship of natural systems. In that marine species only survive in tanks now. this shows up is a couple more places but the biggest is when asuka, shinji, and rei visit village 3. theres also a discussion of purity and disease in relation to species of earth especially with seele's plans that impure life should be wiped out and replaced with pure lifeforms. the aquarium also acts as a character study for rei and asuka since they are both clones carefully monitored by nerv, their whole lives controlled just like the aquarium animals. rei literally can not live outside of her tank for long, and for asuka its about a place to belong and exist in or having no where else to go. also parallele to what happens to humanity later, in that they can only exist is non-corified areas that are maintained by a barrier.

asuka: the changes to her i find very interesting. they took away her parental issues of abandonment (mommy AND daddy issues wow) which drive her in the original anime to the point of breakdown and catatonia. Instead rebuild gave her existential angst cloning blues and hey wow she actually ended up with better mental health (most of the cast made it out better in rebuild actually now that i think about it). in the 1995 anime asuka is a direct opposite contrast to rei. moon/sun, color schemes, personalities, backstories. but here they gave rei and asuka the same backstory! and im still turning it over in my head (rotisserie style). also asuka shikinami was made for a purpose but made it her own in the end and found her reason to keep piloting. in the anime asuka is haunted by the abandonment by her parents. she tries and fails to weaponize her sexuality in an attempt to be wanted you see her try with kaji and again with shinji, she wants a boyfriend or at least the male attention without really understanding what it means to be in a relationship. and its implied this is partially out of her daddy issues. im not sure what to think about the asuka shinji relationship in rebuilt yet. hmmm i will need to think on this more.

[ka-writes]

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Notes: I had already started on the second chapter before I posted the first one, so don’t expect updates every day... I also had to do a lot of googling for this chapter.

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Chapter 1 in case you missed it:

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Inspired by:

Humans are Space Velociraptors

By:FreshRoses_InMyGarden_NeedTheRain

Some kids come from storks, others come from crashed spaceships

By: mmmajora

Home Again, Home Again

By: teeth_eater

All works can be found on Ao3

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Warnings: Cussing, needles, character conflicts, intentional poisoning, poisoning, Jaws reference

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“Humans are [and text here]”

Chapter 2: What is this, an interview?

Tommy was now restrained to a chair six feet away from the weird scientist alien. He had a dark brown lab coat with a fuzzy yellow sweater underneath, matched with black pants and black leather boots. His gold rimmed Harry Potter glasses slipped down his nose bridge a bit before he pushed it up and shuffled through papers. He wore a red beanie with a big whiff of his curly chocolate hair. His skin was a weird translucent grayish color with blue speckles decorating it. He had deep brown eyes with an odd electric blue circle outlining the pupil.

His tongue licked his finger as he turned the page. This was a habit that most of the weird teachers and counselors did. It always annoyed Tommy. This time fear was also mixed into that annoyance. His saliva was tinted blue and he had sharp teeth which immediately reminded him of a shark.

“You have shark teeth.” Tommy stated absentmindedly. Clearly, this caught the scientist alien off guard.

“I have what?” The alien asked, confused.

“Shark teeth.. ya know like the weird fish creatures that eat people.” Tommy started rambling causing the shark-alien to become even more confused and slightly alarmed. “I mean I think they eat people. That’s what the shark movie showed… what was its name, Jaws I think? I dunno, my foster mom freaked out in the middle of it and we went home. That lady was weird.. She made us wear itchy clothes and take weird photos before she sent me back to the group home.”

“What?..” The shark-alien asked. Tommy jumped a bit. He forgot he was rambling to a stranger. Alien stranger at that.

“Doesn’t matter.. What's the first question bitch-boy?” Tommy liked the way the alien jumped at the randomly timed insults.

“Er- right.. First off, what’s your name?” The shark-alien asked after collecting himself.

“Tommy Innit. Yours bitch-boy?” Tommy replied.

“Wilbur Soot. Stop calling me bitch-boy!” Wilbur huffed.

“Next question, bitch-boy!” Tommy emphasized the name, getting an even angrier expression in return. Wilbur’s weird blue circle flashed red for a second which caught Tommy off guard.

Wilbur took a shaky breath before asking the next question. “How old are you?”

“Old enough! I am a big man!” Tommy stated. Yet another thing that pissed him off.

“Age?” Wilbur asked, clearly irritated.

“18.” Wilbur raised a brow, “14.” Tommy huffed. His age should only be his business not some alien-bitch who didn’t even have his file.

“If you keep lying, I may have to get the truth serum from the back.” Wilbur half-heartedly threatened. Tommy, the big man that he is, did not get scared at that statement, only slightly unsettled which clearly showed on his face.

“Now, do you have a family?” Tommy tensed at the question. It was a touchy question and was not one that was asked often especially with his reputation.

“I am a big man. I don’t need a family to be great.” Tommy stated, happy with the answer. The alien-bitch shifted awkwardly.

“Right… What is your diet?”

“Umm.. I dunno, whatever I can find. I am allergic to nuts though..” Wilbur nodded in understanding and wrote things down in his notepad.

“What plants are poisonous to you?” Wilbur asked without looking up from his notes.

“Ermm, poison Ivy, poison oak… uh I think parts of rhubarb, and most wild berries. I am not sure other than that.” Wilbur nodded while adding bits to his notes.

“What was the place you lived like?” This time Wilbur glanced up to look at Tommy. This was again another touchy subject… How many times would this alien bitch get into the sad background?

“Shitty.” Tommy snapped. That was the only response the bitch was gonna get.

“Right.. Do you have music on Earth?”

Tommy scoffed, “Of course we have music, dumbass!”

“Can you tell me about the animals there?” Wilbur asked, almost hopeful.. which was weird. What was he hoping for?

“Erm I guess..” Tommy mumbled, trying to figure out where to start, “There’s a bunch of animals. Mainly on land. My favorite would be the cow.”

“What’s that?” Curiosity stained Wilbur’s face. This got Tommy excited; he was practically beaming as he started talking.

“Well they are these big ruminants that make milk and have horns. There are a bunch of types too like the highland cow, which obviously is the most poggers one. They are a Scottish breed with really long hair. I met one once, on a field trip his name was Henry.” Tommy rambled on for the next two and a half hours, jumping from topic to topic and explaining anything that wasn’t personal. He usually ended those paths with short insults.

——————

Wilbur hated to stop the kids' detailed story, but two and a half celestial hours had already passed, and Dream would be coming to check soon. Luckily, he had a couple new poisons that could pass off as a research development. He had even managed to send the distressed signal and no doubt Phil would already be there with the SBI craft ready to fly at any given moment.

“Alright Tommy.” His voice dropped to a serious tone causing the kid to stop his story of how he got poisoned by mushrooms on a camping trip. “You’re gonna have to trust me just for a bit. I am going to get you off the ship at the next stop but in the meantime I need you to tell me how allergic you’re to nuts.” The kid immediately tensed at the question.

“I am mainly allergic to tree nuts.. almonds being the worst. After a few minutes I can’t breathe properly and I usually pass out. The doctor said if I don’t get it treated within 15 minutes, death is most likely.” He took a moment to go through the information. The kid most likely has an anaphylaxis reaction to tree nuts. Meaning either he would have to know the exact time of landing and exactly where Phil was or he needed another poison that was less severe.

“Alright, here is what we’re gonna do. I have a chemical mixture that is similar to that of rattlesnake venom. I also have a chemical substance that numbs any pain you may feel. Side effects would include being very very tired and delirious over the next few days. Along with being knocked out for a good ten hours. To put it simply I am gonna fake poison you, in order to get you off the ship. It’s your choice if you’re willing to do it.” Wilbur paused to study the kid still restrained in front of him. It was odd how relaxed the kid seemed to be in a situation like this. He had no urge as far as Wilbur was aware, to fight against anything that happened. His complaints only being those that touched on personal matters. It was unsettling to say the least, and intrigued Wilbur. He really wanted to unravel the life the kid had lived before this and how he was actually dealing with the situation.

There was a long pause before the kid spoke, “I wouldn’t mind getting away from the weird smiley bitch.. plus you seem nice and to know what you’re doing so sure. Poison me bitch.” He said the last sentence with an enthusiasm Wilbur wasn’t expecting. He took a moment to rethink his plan, which was interrupted by a knock at the door.

“Dream says you better have advanced in your stupid testing. Otherwise he’s gonna kick you off the ship at the next stop.” Stated the rather rude blazeling, Sapnap. The blazeling never liked Wilbur and made a point to argue against any advancements at meals. That led to Dream installing a new system of emails and Wilbur eating meals alone.

“Yea yea, it’s going!” He yelled through the metal door.

“Better be.” The blazeling snapped before making a non quiet track back to his quarters.

“Stupid blazeling.” Wilbur grumbled as he sorted through vials and picked up new needles and measured out the substances. “We are going to start with the anesthetic then move onto the poison.” He softly addressed Tommy.

Wilbur swiftly disinfected Tommy’s shoulder and gave the needle. He then gave the second needle. Immediately Tommy slumped over. Wilbur swiftly took off Tommy’s restraints and moved him on to the patient bed in the back corner of the room. After the transfer was done he clipped the body restraints around Tommy and waited for the alert signaling landing.

After about five minutes the light next to the door turned blue. He moved over to his seat and clipped on the safety belts. The light turned green and the ship shook momentarily before a thud could be felt. Quickly as Wilbur could, he emptied the needles into the waste bin and waited for his soon-to-be-ex-boss to arrive.

Dream stepped through the door and glanced around the room before heading to Wilbur for his report.

“Report.” The dreamon commanded.

“The subject's body would have gone through a painfully slow death and have multiple organ failures if I did not intervene. The chemical mixes used created a conflict in the patient’s body which resulted in the patient falling into exhaustion as they recovered.” He responded in a monotone tone. Dream looked over Tommy. He flinched back in disgust as Tommy grunted in his sleep.

“Is that all?” The dreamon questioned.

“No.” Wilbur swallowed down his panic, “This is the last testing I will be doing with this crew.” The dreamon scoffed.

“I am assuming you’re getting off at this planet?” Dream spit. Wilbur knew he absolutely hated when people left his crew as he saw it as a direct violation of his loyalty.

“Yes.” The phantom stated, keeping his even tone apparent. With that Dream stormed out cursing in Siestian. Somewhere in the mess of words he told Wilbur to get his things.

Without hesitation he grabbed his bag from his quarters, which was held in a small room that branches off the lab. He half sprinted down the short hallway and straight to the bed Tommy was on. He swiftly unrestrained the human and sat him up. He slipped on boots and gloves then tied a cloak around the kid. He pulled the hood up and carried him off of the closest exit. There were faint yells from Dream down the hallway and reassurances from the only two beings that put up with him. And with that Wilbur was off to find the only craft he had ever called home. The SBI ship.

——————

Chapter 2- End

Words~ 1774

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End Notes: ‘‘twas to lazy to reread... sorry for minor mistakes. Also suggestions are always appreciated!! Please reblog...

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Chapter 3:

——————

Wilbur:

[silksandcravats]

Well well well... you're just in time Zimmermansbrat... Morby is sending out asks tonight...

You are a new follower and dont know me perhaps very well, but sometimes I like to send out litte challenges and stuff to you writers out there, and I have one you may like to sink your teeth into...

Use the following to write a story...

https://youtu.be/Tk46D1eFXZo "Dont Wanna Go The Other Way" by Cody Chesnut.

Yep I know, this looks totally nuts right?

It's a technique my mums writing group use to create new stories, or perhaps brain storm around problems in their work.

There are rules... you can add whatever you like, but you have to use the song and at least three pictures.

I'm gonna do one myself, so I can see if it works as a new idea to get out of my writers block.

Please dont feel obliged to answer, it's totally up to you if you'd like to participate... but it would be awesome if you did!

Have Fun and Thanks for the follow

Love

Morby

❤

Morby! So nice to hear from you again, thank you for this wonderful ask! This collage just seems so Sackler to me so I had to, lol. I feel like the final product ended up being a bit jumpy, I had a bit of trouble smoothly stringing along the different aspects into one imagine plotline, but I had so much fun with this challenge! I hope I did it justice!

masterlist

summary: y/n spends the day with her weirdo neighbour and nobody could have predicted how things pan out.

warnings: swearing, a poor understanding of New York geography

You stood by your front door, jaw clenched, keys gripped tightly in hand, ear pressed against the wood as you listened as closely as you could for the telltale sign of your weirdo neighbour across the hall retreating into his room. 

“Oh shit, fuck are you going speedy?” 

“Oh shit, fuck are you going speedy?” 

“Oh shit, fuck are you going speedy?” 

Your eyes squeezed shut and you cursed silently. You didn’t have to look up to know who was speaking, the booming, goofy, tone. You took a deep breath to compose yourself before pulling backwards, at least as much as you could with his vice rip on your arms still present.

“Hey Adam, ugh, I was just going to run some errands I-”

“I was wondering what the fuck everyone’s been up to? It’s been quiet as shit down this whole hallway, felt like I was in a ghost town or some shit.” He interrupted you.

“That’s great um.” You tugged your arms slightly and he got the message, he released your arms finally with a quick ‘sorry’. “Anyways, um I was just headed out, I’ve got some shopping to do so.”

“Yeah so do I, that’s just where I was headed we can be like shopping buddies or whatever.” He offered, showing off a toothy grin, big eyes meeting yours. He was attractive, with his big strong nose and his long floppy black hair, you’d be lying if you said he wasn’t. You’d found yourself rather drawn to him in the beginning, but that had only lasted until the first few times he had opened his mouth. He turned out to be rather strange and awkward and it just wasn’t something you could get past, and so you had begun avoiding the pretty weirdo at all costs. 

You were ready to turn him down and be on your merry way but you were tired of avoiding him and you didn’t know how much fight you had left in you. Not to mention it was well into winter now, which meant the sun would only be up for another hour or so, and you never fancied walking through your part of New York alone after dark. And so you found yourself agreeing, how long could a few groceries take after all?

“Great but you’ve gotta come along to some to do some of my errands too.” He said, turning and walking ahead, making it halfway down the hallway in just a few long strides.

“What like drycleaning?” you asked, trotting along to catch up with him. 

“No, not really.” He answered vaguely, hurrying down the steps two at a time. 

You started with your shopping, which he let you get through without too much trouble. In fact, the whole ordeal had been almost pleasant, you were trying to pick out an onion when you looked over to see him holding two different zucchinis in his hand.

“Hey y/n. Do you think I’m more like this one or this one?” He asked rather loudly through the store, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

“I think,” you paused, settling on one of the freshest looking onions near the top of the stack, “that it’s a wonder you’re still allowed out in public.” 

“Oh shit,” his expression shifted, his grin deepened and he looked somewhat surprised by you, “You’re a little feisty after all.” he sounded impressed, “Well if you can guess which one is right, I’ll buy all your groceries.” 

“Ok fine.” You crossed your arms, pretending to seriously contemplate the vegetables, you decided to be generous, opting for the slightly larger one. “Left.”

“Actually the answer was neither, it’s bigger than both of these.” He winked, tossing the vegetables down and circling around to your side of the display.

“Oh, I’m sure that’s true.” You jabbed sarcastically.

“I can show you later if you’d like.” he teased, walking into your space.

“Shut up let’s go.” you tried to be serious but a little giggle slipped out anyway as you playfully pushed him forward towards the checkout. 

-

Adam’s errands turned out to be a somewhat chaotic stroll through a small corner park. You must have spent much longer in that little park then either of you had been expecting, you sat on a little bench for a while just talking. You told him about the work you had been up, and he turned out to be an actor, telling you about an audition he had recently been to, and how he thought he did really well but honestly he didn’t really like the movie’s concept so if he didn’t make the role then it was no big deal.

Never being one for small talk, you were sure that your little day out with Adam would slowly trudge by, loaded with plenty of awkward silences, but it turned out being with Adam was easy. He had no trouble keeping the conversation going, and he always managed to bring up things you actually wanted to talk about. And he was so funny, you’d be willing to listen to his jokes all day except that at one point he made you laugh so hard your stomach began to hurt and you couldn’t get a full gulp of air down your lungs for almost a minute straight.

It wasn’t until the sky began to turn a pinky-orange that you realised what time it was and suggested to head back. You had wound up rather far from your apartment complex so you both made the decision to take the subway home. It was rush hour by now so you had to push and shove a bit to get down the stairs and over to the platform you needed, and it was an even tighter squeeze when you got onto your actual train. You ended up shoved tightly against him for the first few stops, it was silly, but you tried not to let yourself dwell on the giddy feeling you got being so close to him.

As you made your way out of midtown, the car cleared out some, and Adam appeared to be growing restless, surveying his surroundings to find something to occupy himself before settling on the fire extinguisher by the door. He played with the features of it for a moment before pulling it off the wall to examine it closer.

“Adam, put it back.” you quickly scolded when you caught wind of what he was doing.

“Relax I’m just looking at it.” 

“You’re not supposed to touch it!” You insisted.

“If I wasn’t supposed to be touching it then they should have attached it to the wall better.” He continued playing with the extinguisher, pulling the tiny safety bar out, dropping it carelessly, letting it rattle against the floor.

“They can’t do that, what if someone needs it, Adam, please put it down,” you begged, trying to grab it from him, but he pulled it away quickly.

“Oh come on, this thing’s probably been in here like a kajillion years, shit wouldn’t even work anymore.” He continued, twisting it in his hands.

“Yes, it does! Now leave it alone, I’m serious.” You begin to panic at the thought of him doing something dumb.

“Wanna bet?” You could see the mischief practically glittering in his eyes as he suddenly mounted the extinguisher. You felt the blood drain from your face.

“Adam I swear to God if you-” 

But you were too late, suddenly a thick cloud of fire retardant burst through the canister filling the car with smoke and panic, the force sending Adam a few feet forward before his weight pulled him back to the ground and he toppled over in a fit of laughter.

“Adam!” You screeched humiliated as the car erupted in coughing fits and a few swears. You glared straight at the floor as you marched over to him, avoiding the heated glares and shouting, as you pulled him up quickly.

“Come on this is our stop.” You announced sharply, pulling him towards the doors as the train came to a stop.

“No, it’s not.” He looked at you confused, still halfway smiling, proud of his own stunt.

“Yes. it. is.” You say through gritted teeth, pulling him onto the platform. 

Of course, it wasn’t really your stop, and you could’ve saved yourself quite a few blocks of travelling time by staying on, but the thought of carrying on with those passengers, after what Adam had done, for even a second longer was too much to bear. It wasn’t until you were nearly at your building that Adam seemed to pick up on just how upset the whole thing had made you. 

“Hey look I didn’t know it’d be such a big deal to you.” He offers, kicking a small rock along the pavement as he trudged on.

“That was so embarrassing, you can’t do shit like that Adam.” You grumble, not willing to forgive him.

“It’s New York, people do fucking weird shit here every day,”

“This is the worst apology I’ve ever heard.” You stopped on the first step of the building, turning to look at him.

“I’m sorry? Ok? I won’t do shit like that ever again when we’re out together? Happy?” He said, moving onto your step next to you.

“When are we going out together again?” You asked, cocking your head slightly. 

“Have you ever been on the roof?” He asked back, ignoring your question entirely, backing up the steps.

“No? Wait I don’t think we’re allowed on the roof!” You followed him up into the building.

“Drop your shit off and meet me in the hallway, I’ll make things up to you I promise.” He winked.

-

“Do you keep your bike up here?” You tried and failed to hide a smile at the sight in front of you. Adam was in front of you twisting and turning his handlebar, trying to show you how he could lean back and balance on the back wheel.

“Sometimes I do, no assholes have tried to steal it yet so,” his speech comes out almost in grunts, as he focused intently on performing his trick for you.

“You wanna try it?” He asks, dismounting and moving some of his hair out of his face.

“That’s ok, I’m not a stunt master like you,” you excused, “besides, I’m not sure my feet would even reach the pedals, that thing’s huge.”

“Hey look at this!” He dropped the bike, moving to the ledge of the roof, “you can see for fucking miles up here.” You followed him over, pulling the hoodie you had grabbed from your place tighter against you as a cool gust of wind flew by. It was pretty much dark now, and you could see the lights of your city clearly from here. It wasn’t a particularly tall building you lived in, there was bigger on either side and across the way, but you could see clearly down both sides of the street. New York felt bigger with all the lights on if that was even possible. There was something about the bright city lights that set off curiosity in you. People really lived in every single one of those windows, they had a whole life, and family and friends and jobs and dreams and you’ll never know most of them.

“It’s amazing isn’t it.” you sighed, staring at as much of the world as you could possibly see from your little perch.

“Yeah, it is.” He said, watching you watch your city.

-

You really had meant to go back to your place after that, but Adam had coaxed you into coming into his apartment instead, insisting that it was only fair for you to see his place after the day you had together.

“Do you want like juice or anything?” He offered, trying to be hospitable as he closed the door behind you. 

“No thank you.” you smiled, taking in the place. It was messy for sure, but you’d seen worse, there was a lot of open space in the middle of the room, there was a couch at the far end of the room, but it was covered with clothes and things at the moment.

“You like music?” He asked, messing with something that must be sitting on a small table by his front door, he moved slightly and you could see the device he was hiding.

“You have an actual record player? That’s crazy, I didn’t know people still had those.” Your feet were ready to give out after the day you’d had, so you decided to sit down on the floor, watching him shuffle through records before settling on one and moving to put it in place on the player.

“You know what they say, no music, no life.” He moved the needle, letting it drop near the edge of the vinyl. An R&B artist you vaguely recognised began playing through the apartment. 

“You listen to this stuff?” You asked, watching him sit next to you on the floor, moving directly to a lying position on the floor.

“Come on, it sounds better down here.” he insisted, patting the empty wooden panels next to him. You obliged, leaning back against the hardwood, shuffling slightly to get more comfortable. 

“I really am sorry,” he added after a while, another apology filling pushing into the brief silence of the room as you both waited for the next track on the record to begin. You kept your eyes trained on the ceiling, but you could feel his gaze move to you. “Guess I’m just a shit flirt.” Your eyes grew as you took in the weight of his words as if on cue the opening lines of the next song began softly through the apartment. You held off on laughing at him for the song choice, focusing on holding onto the words which had just come out of his mouth.

“You’ve been flirting with me all day?” You ask, turning on your side, propping yourself up on your elbow, staring at him.

“Oh fuuuck yeah,” he shrugged, turning to look at the ceiling again. “I flirt with you all the time kid,” he added casually, tapping his foot against the wood as the chorus began to pick up. 

“W-what?” you asked, dumbfounded. “You were flirting… with me?”

“Of course I was, you’re funny and I think you’re pretty smart.” he listed off easily, still staring at the ceiling, “ also you’re fucking so hot, I fucking just wanna look at your face all day.”

“Why didn’t you ask me out of something?” You hummed, looking down at the floor.

“I guess I thought that was kinda what today was.” He rolled over, suddenly his face was only an inch or so from yours.

“It can’t be a date if I don’t know it is, it only counts if we both agree that-”

“Can I kiss you?” he cut you off, eyes darting between your eyes and your lips. 

“O-okay.” your face suddenly felt hot, but you had little time to dwell on it before he leaned in, kissing you eagerly, nose prodding against yours, his hand coming up to cup the side of your face. He nipped and nibbled at your bottom lip for a moment before wiggling his tongue into your mouth, kissing you more eagerly. His other hand came up to your side, and in one swift motion, he tugged you on top of him. 

You got lost in kissing him for the tiniest moment before you mentally re-entered the room, ears perking up at the sound of the song entering its second chorus. 

“Can we redo all of this in about 2 minutes?” You giggled, pulling yourself off his mouth slightly to stare down at him.

“What? Why?” his face scrunched up in confusion and then he gripped your face, pulling you down again.

“Becaaaauuussse,” you groan, pulling back again. “Don’t wanna go the other way by Cody Chesnutt cannot be our song.”

“Too late now kid,” He hummed pulling all of your weight down to him, tucking you into his chest. “Too late now.”

[hsinliu]

talk to me (ichirou moriyama)

there was a loud screeching sound, a tire nearly burning against asphalt, the car, a matte black expensive sport style one, abruptly stopped at the front of the building. ichirou, the current lord moriyama, walked out of the drivers seat and tossed the keys to the valet parking muttering a comand in rapid japanese, the valet parking bowed his head and held the keys close to his chest before hurrying to park the car.

ichirou was wearing his usual attire, a black fitted suit from some fancy designer which now had a fresh blood stain on the right cuff of the dress shirt, the thought of it irritated him, he walked to the elevator in long strides not making eye contact with anyone but everyone stopped walking as soon as they saw him and bowed his head. ichirou swiped the key card to his room, punched a code, did a retina scan and only then the door swung open with a beep.

the penthouse was illuminated briefly as a lighting struck outside and some seconds after the thunder coated ichirou's ears. ichirou rubbed between his eyebrows and changed his clothes into something more comfortable, not that he dislikes wearing suits but tonight he wanted to relax and didn't feel like dealing with curious eyes. ichirou walked out once he was ready.

"oyabun, where are you going? do you need to be scorted?" one of the guards outside his room asked, using the honorific freely as the building was secured.

"no, i'm just going to the convenience store. you can rest." this time ichirou made eye contact with the kobun, dismissing them with a slight hand movement.

now ichirou was wearing a dark blue baggy tracksuit. despite having his face half covered with the hood everyone bowed his head as he walked out, again.

next to the moriyama building there was a convenience store from a japanese chain since everything from american chains tasted like cardboard. ichirou crossed the door and the employee greeted him in japanese. walking down the aisles he picked some items to have dinner, he picked a potato and egg salad sandwich, yakisoba noodles, a cup of microwaveable rice, strawberry mochi for dessert and ice americano, he walked a bit more wondering what else he needed for the night and lastly picked a face mask that claimed contains colagen.

he dropped the items for the cashier to scan them. "i will take them." the cashier said, he was a young man, couldn't be older than 23 "it's 22.8 dollars."

"you're good looking." ichirou said looking directly at him.

"excuse me?" the boy asked, his cheeks blushing.

"do you take yens? i didn't bring any dollars." ichirou took out his wallet and then continued the previous conversation "like an idol, are you one of these?"

the boy's cheek were now an angry red, his eyes open wide in surprise. "huh? yeah we take yens, it's two hundred-" ichirou put a few five hundred yen bills on the counter before he finished the sentence and the boy hurried to give the change.

"keep the change." ichirou interrumpted his action and train of thought.

"it's too much, i can't-".

"keep the change, don't make me repeat myself again." ichirou said with a more serious tone but polite eyes who did not help the boy's blush.

grateful the boy bowed his head "thank you, lord-".

"don't. just call me ichirou." ichirou took the bag with his items "come sit with me " he suggested with a head tilt before walking to the sitting area, he dropped the things on a table and microwaved the rice, then he muttered 'thanks for the food' to no one in particular and finally began eating.

"am i in trouble, lord-" ichirou gave him an accusatory look "am i in trouble, ichirou?" he corrected himself.

ichirou spoke after a few mouthfuls of rice "what makes you believe that? and how did you know it was me?" the tone was friendly but the boy didn't feel any more comfortable.

"the- the tattoos." the cashier pointed to his own chest and ichirou looked down on himself, he then noticed the zipper was a little too low so his chest and a glimpse of his tattoos were visible. "i wasn't- i wasn't staring." but he was. "and i see you everyday, i mean, you always come back around this time, i always have the night shift."

ichirou zipped up the hoodie with a slight smile "ah, that makes sense. you didn't reply my other questions, tough." now he was mixing the yakisoba noodles with his chopsticks.

the boy gulped, his mouth dry. "i'm not an idol, i'm a college student. i thought i was in trouble since you requested me to come sit with you."

after eating half the noodles ichirou spoke "really? what college? maybe we're on the same campus. and no you are not in trouble i just wanted to have your company, you could have refused." ichirou spoke in a calm voice, pronouncing each word with delicacy.

"why are you asking so many questions about myself? i'm just an employee in this convenience store." the boy was fidgeting with a strand on his clothes.

"to answer your question, it's just as i told you you're good looking, isn't that reason enough to want to have your company? i like to be around beautiful people." ichirou took a sip of the ice americano and then bit the mochi "would you rather ask questions about myself instaed? we can do that, i know the surveillance of the store doesn't have audio, you can ask whatever you want." the boy didn't immediately speak and kept fidgeting not quite making eye contact "hey, look at me" ichirou said with a gentle voice touching the boy's chin with his index and middle finger so he would look up "i know i'm intimidating, i would feel insulted if you didn't think i am. i can stop talking if that's what you want, i'm just going to finish this" he pointed to his food "and then i'm going to walk out that door. if that's what you want." ichirou repeated, in hopes the boy didn't want that.

a few minutes passed and ichirou was almost finished with his food, he was on his last sip of ice americano when the boy finally spoke again "i'm going to OOO university by the way, and mmh i wanted to ask, why were you angry today?"

ichirou was both pleased and surprised by the question "oh, you noticed? well i was angry because a certain business didn't go as planed and because i don't like this weather." he flexed his right hand remembering the way he had broke someone's nose just a few hours ago.

the boy wanted to ask if he got into fights frequently or what kind of business was he refering to but instaed asked "what kind of weather do you like better? i like when it's cloudy but only when i get to stay home and watch movies." now he was more relaxed, he rested his elbows on the table and put his hand against his cheek, enhancing his boyish looks.

ichirou let out a laugh "yeah, this kind of weather is for people who can allow themselves to spend the whole day at home, it's not good for going to work, i like when it's sunny with a clear sky."

the cashier got a mental image of ichirou on a park or a garden enjoying the weather but then remembered something "i've seen a little girl around the moriyama building, is she your sister?"

"i don't have siblings." ichirou replied with a polite smile.

"oh? she looks like you, i was sure she was somehow related to you." the boy elaborated, not giving up on his theory.

"that is because she's my daughter." at this confesion the boy's eyes widened "she isn't usually in the country, you know for safety reasons, but she has been behaving like a brat lately so she comes back almost every weekend, the other kobuns say i spoil her too much but she's just a little girl, am i supposed to tell her no?, she can learn about the family business when she grows up there's no need for me to be rough with her from the start."

"she's going into the... business too?" the boy asked carefully, it sounded like ichirou is fond of her daughter so he wondered why he would want that for her.

ichirou removed his hoodie and ran a hand through his hair before putting it back on "i had her out of... tradition, i needed a successor and i ended up loving her, that's not how it should have been, that certainly didn't happen to me and my predecessor. but yes she's going into the business, i hope she doesn't hate me for it."

"did you? hate your- your predecessor for it?"

ichirou let out a humorless laugh "of course i did, i was ripped out of any normalness i could achieve before i even had it. maybe i'm doing it wrong, maybe giving her a normal life and then taking it off of her is going to do more harm than good. mmh? don't you think?"

the boy was startled by the sudden question. he didn't expect to be questioned on his opinion on ichirou's decisions on how to raise his daughter. he gulped and then spoke "i don't know what to tell you, i've never been in that kind of situation."

ichirou sighed loudly, finished his drink and threw it on a trash can "yeah, that was a weird thing to ask, sorry." he glanced sidelong at the cashier and smiled. "do you think it's pathetic that i came to some convenience store seeking for a friend?"

the cashier dropped his gaze fidgeted with the hem of his uniform and quietly said "i think you are... sad."

ichirou got up from his seat "i think it's time for me to go."

"we can be friends, if you need one." the boy got up too.

"i think it's best if we don't."

ichirou walked to the door and when he was about to walk out the boy spoke "you're so weird, did you know that? you literally said you were looking for a friend and when i suggest it you act like it's me the one pushing it."

"you are right but i really have to go now. i'm sorry."

the boy stood there for a while, then a group of teenagers entered the store making a fuss about what kind of food to buy. after they were gone the cashier refilled some aisles and finally sat behind the counter "did i accidentaly fall asleep at work and had a dream about having a conversation with the head of the moriyama family? i think so."

[miraculouscontent]

Askplosion #11:

(note that I know I mentioned a “Voiced Askplosion” last time in the tags for anyone who put a 🎤 in their ask, meaning they wanted to hear me respond verbally to it, but I only got one and it wasn’t anything serious - just a tease from someone I know - so I either won’t be doing it at all or will be holding off)

Asks responding to previous posts:

ALYA NO!!!

(the idea of Sabrina avoiding not only Ms. Mendeleiev, but also Alya, is very amusing to me)

The fact that the special focuses on the love square instead of Sabrina and Delmar is a crime.

(also note that “Need some help?” is rhetorical in this context; Alya doesn’t care)

Highly recommended, honestly, otherwise it just turns into a big shame because there are shows I really like but with some content that I don’t like, and why torture myself with it when I can cut it out instead?

Just to give a rough idea, here’s my cut of “Desperada”; mind you, this is just my quick cut of it (basically a “beta” version where I just removed everything I disliked without much care for transitioning/having everything make sense; some of Marinette’s friends talking, the guitar scene, Aspik, etcetera), as I’m not comfortable handing over my “perfect” cut of it since it’s like my personal copy.

Yeah, that’s a super awkward scene. As much as I’d like to imagine that Adrien just doesn’t understand the “guy time” thing (which I still hate), the fact that they use the word “guy” specifically is--ugh.

I wasn’t aware of what he said in the French dub, so thanks! It’s really painful to see her throw so much love his way, openly and publicly and obviously, then be so humiliated for it, only for Adrien to feel nothing for her.

Say whatever you want about Chat Noir’s advances and how sAAAAAAD he is when she rejects him, but her rejections are just that; in private. There aren’t other heroes who are around and Chat is never really humiliated. Even in “Prime Queen,” Chat wasn’t the target - Ladybug was, and then Ladybug shifted it to Nadja - so Marinette is the one taking all the heat in love while Chat gets to sit on the sidelines (plus, then “Oblivio” happened and now people probably all thing they’re a thing).

Yeah! That’s the group I was thinking of!

Thank you!

I’m so sorry that happened. ;—;

I’m not aro but I am ace and I’ve gotten the whole, “oh it’s just because--” stuff before, so I know what it feels like to have people put on the pressure/invalidate you.

YES.

IT’S GORGEOUS.

I’m not really familiar with how holidays are celebrated outside of the bare basics of Christmas/New Year (which I am trying my hardest to forget lol), so I couldn’t say.

Sorry!

New Asks:

10/10 thought, would fantasize again.

Though would also accept MC Audrey just doing some “spring cleaning” of the whole staff in general. I have no idea how she’d replace Jeremy since he’s the company’s poster boy but most of the writers have to go at the very least and Jeremy should be given less power.

I think MC Audrey would appreciate how Kagami carries herself, though potential bonus if - while Tom and Sabine just openly trust whatever Marinette wants - Audrey does a bunch of digging to make sure Kagami is “worthy” of being with Marinette (she takes this all very seriously).

Double potential bonus if Kagami takes it just as seriously, so here’s Audrey and Kagami acting as if Kagami dating Marinette is like some sort of job interview.

Kagami handing over a “resume” of her accomplishments to Audrey. Audrey has already looked all of it up herself but appreciates the effort put in.

If the question in Miraculous is, “Do we really need a--” and the thing being introduced is something the staff came up with then the answer is usually “no.”

The movie will look pretty and that’s all I’ll expect. It’s just Jeremy’s take on Miraculous. Luka and Kagami probably won’t even be around so I’m not even interested.

I’ll watch it, but I’m also not interested lol.

Honestly, I’d rather turn into bubble froth.

oddly specific but... I mean, damn

I have no idea, and I try not to throw around words like “spite ship” because I know people could genuinely like the ship, though I will say that I went on AO3 and - unless I read from - the first Maribat fanfiction on there was posted after the airdate of “Chameleon.” I think it might’ve started with inspiration from “Marinette moves schools” ideas at the very least.

Non-Miraculous Asks responding to previous posts:

Oh, I understood, no worries! It was just funny for the split second it took me to figure it out.

My bad, that’s not how I meant to come off (especially since “magical girl shows” is a little broad; I mean, obviously I don’t think something like Cardcaptor Sakura is aiming for fanservice when Sakura’s--like... ten). I answered all those asks in the last askplosion in the same day so my brain was a little fried by the time I got to that ask.

I’m not even talking about Sailor Moon either; it’s just that I knew there are shows with fanservice and there are certain magical girl outfits where I kind of give the side-eye.

Absolutely zero problem with girls fighting in pretty outfits though. I fully admit that I’m a bit of a prude so sometimes I see fanservice where there might not be any. Super short skirts without shorts, for example, inherently throw me off (shout-out to Saint Tail - which I discovered while looking up “pretty magical girl outfits” - because the main character does have a skirt in “magical girl” form but also tights/boots and a cute hat, which is one of the more unique ones I’ve seen).

Non-Miraculous Asks:

Do you mean Sailor Moon Crystal? Yeah, the only reason I hesitate on Sailor Moon in general is because I’m not crazy about the transformed designs. It’s not really a matter of animation but more a design choice that takes me out of the experience.

I have seen all of Cardcaptor Sakura anime though, and then all of the Clear Card arc. I like the former, despise the latter, and I tried to keep up with the manga but once one of the big plot details were revealed, I officially dropped it.

As for Revolutionary Girl Utena, I looked it up a while ago and don’t remember what exactly turned me away. It might’ve been the darker tone though if what you say is accurate that it’s a darker take on a magical girl show.

Also, I may or may not have looked up the ending of at least Princess Tutu and I’m sorry, I’m sure it’s a great anime, but if there isn’t a happy ending then I give whatever anime a hard pass.

(note: yes, I realize the hilarity of saying that when I continue watching Miraculous)

-

(More Madoka Magica talk/salt below!)

Ohhh, it started a trend? I had no idea since I don’t actively keep up with every anime out there; descriptions need to really pull me in (the only current anime I’m keeping up with is Hanyou no Yashahime, Otherside Picnic, and Cells at Work (Season 2)).

The focus on specific--uh--body parts in magical girl transformations also reminds me that I think that’s usually what kills it for me, not because of the sexualization but because I expect transformations (especially ones that get repeated over and over) to be really dynamic with changing angles and such, which is harder to do when the camera is trying to draw focus to specific places.

Obviously you have to do it for some moments (I’ve always imagined Miraculous transformations like a potential sheep or another one for rabbit, then rabbit!Jean from Leave for Mendeleiev and fox!Juleka from LadyBugOut) because things will be weird if you focus on nothing, but I think there are ways to draw the eye without trying to sexualize.

Not having Ladybug-esque bodysuits is a good start. It reminds me too much of the Catwoman with just a bodysuit so it leaves nothing to the imagination.

How did I forget about that Sayaka scene? omg (though I dunno if the Bechdel Test is hard to pass if there aren’t really any endgame male love interests? are there rules about that? not saying a pass isn’t a pass but it feels like cheating)

It is nice when fans can respect the opinions of others without having to outright attack. I have had a few people come to me with, “I see your point/respect it even if I disagree,” instead of accusing me/others of--well, you get it.

Fandoms can be really messy, particularly as they get larger. I think there’s a certain balance between small fandoms that all know each other and a big fandom that’s out of control. Then there are things like “loud minority” and it’s just uggggh.

Anyway, back to the asks themselves, yeah, I’m not crazy about taking things that are just meant to be positive/cute/whatever and being like, “OKAY BUT WHAT IF IT WAS EDGY AND SAD.”

n o ,  p l z

Oh, I’ve never heard of that one!

Sayaka dying didn’t really do anything for me either. It’s hard to explain when I saw it so long ago, but it was just Sayaka’s attitude about the whole thing and it made it feel underwhelming. It was a shame too because I liked her and she had potential.

She was Madoka’s friend so I was just like, “Yeah, she’ll die soon.” Probably didn’t help since I knew what I knew about the show being “dark.”

Madoka/Sayaka is probably what I’d support the most out of all the potential shoujo ai ships. To my knowledge, none of them are really canon, though I remember a special song after the death Sayaka and Kyoko which I guess makes them the most canon and that did basically nothing for me since their relationship didn’t interest me (nor did I care for Kyoko as a character). The PSP game might have more intimate potential between the girls, but I never played them so I can’t make those claims (I only remember something about everyone potentially living and then a bad ending for Sayaka where part of her body was decayed when they didn’t get her soul gem back in time).

The tomboy argument makes me think back to a conversation with a friend of mine where we were discussing tomboys in anime and... we couldn’t really think of any? At least any that really qualify as “tomboy” for me.

Like, Misty from Pokemon, for example. I knoooooow everyone really likes Misty, but regardless of my opinion on her, it’s hard to see her as a tomboy.

I feel like they try to lean that way by making her super aggressive and violent (because... m E N) and I think Ash makes a comment once about her not being “like a girl,” but... I feel like that’s just how general “aggressive” female characters are written?

I mean, that’s tsundere female characters I’ve seen in general. Really loud (and not in a “gIrlS aRe sO lOuD aND ScReEcHY” way but like... the way anime gives them big heads while they scream at whatever male character they’re mad at), angry a lot, short fuse, etcetera.

But Misty is still crazy about clothes and dolls, she still gushes about cute things and romance, and both of those things seem pretty indicative of what “standard girl character” would be defined by, since they’re all “stereotypically girl thing” (I say stereotypically for obvious reasons since boys can like blah and girls can like blah and gender exclusivity is blah--). I get that she dresses differently, but that’s about it, and it comes off like, “she dresses differently and she’s ANGRY and VIOLENT, so she’s a tomboy,” which... yeah. They even gave her three beauty queen sisters with CURVES and BUSTS as if to say, “See?? These are GIRLS, not TOMBOYS.” (busty females can exist who are also tomboys, thank you have a nice day).

This becomes more complicated in magical girl anime since girly clothes are usually part of that so “tomboy” means that frills and skirts probably wouldn’t be a factor.

I mean, if you gave those sorts of outfits to me, I’d be like, “SCREW IT, I’M NOT A MAGICAL GIRL ANYMORE. IF LOOKING PRETTY IS REDUCED TO SKIRTS AND FRILLS, SOMEONE ELSE CAN SAVE THE WORLD.”

I’d also like to see some mixes between personalites and “tomboy” things. Like, non-stereotypical tomboy personalities doing tomboy things. Mix and match, y’know?

This was really rambly, but to answer the question... no, I wouldn’t count Sayaka as a tomboy.

All of this.

I think it also exemplifies the whole “dark and edgy magical girl show” thing because... ugh, how do I put this...

The “girls are overly emotional” thing is already bad, but then you realize that there not being any magical boys is also because that doesn’t hit the “shock value” threshold as much.

Y’know, because boys equal dark and edgy shows, so if there was even one magical boy it wouldn’t be as shocking when Mami gets her head chomped. They could’ve done, “emotional teenagers are the target because they’re in that vulnerable stage; smarter and more physically capable than children, but not as mature/stable as adults,” but having some boys in there for balance (it makes me feel weird saying that when I’m all for girl power shows with an all female cast, but in this show’s logic, it’s a different ball game) would make the show seem less bright and “girly” and thus lessen the shock value.

Does that make sense?

[elsanna-shenanigans]

April Contest Submission #10: Green Like Flowers

Words: ca. 4,000 Setting: Modern AU Lemon: No CW: mild angst

The train whistled as it left the station. A piercing scream, cutting through the dewy darkness of early morning. Birds, startled awake from their nightly slumber, took to the sky. Fleeing like their wings were on fire, up and away from branches that were all but safe a few moments before. Their small black bodies quickly lost to a sky that had not yet been kissed by an unforgiving sun.

The engine chugged, rhythmically turning large, cold steel wheels. Pulling both itself and its posy of railcars along with it. Quickly picking up speed, outside one of the windows; a dog ran alongside the tracks. His tongue hanging outside his large muzzle, flopping with each bounding leap. He ran on a well-worn path, a frequent activity. The further the train went, the more he fell behind until Elsa could no longer see him. So too did the path fade. Giving way to leaf-covered ground and sparse trees. The click-clack of the train melted into nothing, like the ocean waves when one lives by the sea.

Elsa Settled into her seat but dared not to rest. Her mind racing fasting then the landscape outside the window. The train was still mostly empty, many seats were vacant. She glanced around, taking everything in without fear of looking creepy. The floor was carpet tiles, frayed on every edge but free of at least large debris. The seats, two on each side of the aisle, were a worn blue fabric. Each headrest was adorned with stark white doctor’s table paper. Fluorescent lightbulbs of varying shades of white and yellow had been illuminating the narrow walkways, now dimmed. Allowing the high-backed seats to cast long shadows.

A few rows back an older man sat slouched in his seat, his fedora, which had seen better days, was pulled down to cover his eyes. The ghost of a beard was painted across a jaw held tight by clenched teeth. Next to him, an older woman sat, knitting with the speed of a youth long past. She was counting to herself or perhaps singing. Her thin lips moving in unison with dancing needles. So the yarn was tugged and so too the corners of her mouth.

In another row a small child was fast asleep, curled into his’s mother’s side. The woman’s head tilted back, mouth agape. She wore what looked to be a brand new hoodie, a large sports logo plastered across the chest. It wasn’t a team Elsa recognized, the child shifted slightly, and they too wore a matching hoodie.

Elsa turned back so she was facing forward once more.  She glanced out the smudged windows to see the faintest hint of light, peeking over the horizon. And she took a moment to marvel at the fact she had to travel North, then West, then South, then West again just to reach the opposite coast. All the years of human advancements and there still wasn’t a train that simply went East to West. Instead, it zig-zagged across rivers, over the plains, and through mountains.

A movement to her left caused her to turn. A man about her age sat restlessly in his seat. Large headphones completely engulfed his ears. One hand clutching a phone, the other gesturing wildly through the air - pointer finger and thumb fully extended with the remaining fingers ever so slightly curved inward. His voice was barely above a whisper, Elsa had to strain to hear the words which were choppy, loose, but forever moving forward like a rushing stream over stones.

Just then the door between cars slid open, spilling the outside in. Chains rattled, wind blew, the click-clack of the track demanded attention. And standing there, a young ember, sparking as intense eyes surveyed the nearly empty train car before settling on Elsa and finally flicking to the seat next to her. The door closed as if in agreement and the woman floated over. Two copper veins of braids framed a speckled face. She smiled and sat down without asking.

“I’m Anna,” she said, it wasn’t a comment or an introduction, it was a commanding statement. She was Anna and whoever she was, Elsa had no choice but to deal with the sudden intrusion.

“Elsa.” She replied, trying to match the other’s tone.

This earned a nod from Anna, her head tipping back, chin raised for a brief moment before landing in neutral again. Silence settled like a heavy fog. Elsa was never good at small talk. Through the defining silence, she heard the ticking of knitting needles and soft rap lyrics start again. Nothing from the mother or child, this new woman’s entrance had not been enough to wake them from slumber.

“Where are you headed?” Anna asked, keeping her voice low.

“San Francisco,” Elsa replied, trying to ignore how much the woman’s eyes stabbed right through her.

“Oh what?!?” she paused to take a breath and bring her volume back down. “I’m going there too, maybe we can be train buddies!”

And suddenly the flames that protected the young woman from the outside world parted and Elsa saw, not a commanding bitch of a woman, but an innocence - a kindness that she hadn’t seen in a person in a long time.

“Buddies,” Elsa repeated slowly as if tasting the word for the first time.

This earned another smile from Anna, who had either not noticed Elsa’s lack of enthusiasm or chose to ignore it.

“Well it’s what like, 15 days to get from here,” she pointed beyond Elsa to the series of trees whipping past the window. “Aaaall the way over to there. So I think, it would be nice to have someone to talk to, have meals with, maybe exchange playlists…”

“I mean I don’t know,” she pulled her arms in like pulling a trenchcoat closed. She dared not to let the demons out nor let any new evil in. She hated meeting new people, hated that period of time when stupid questions are asked. Hated, even more, when the friendship was temporary, formed for convenience rather than growth. Why spend all that time putting cereal in a bowl piece by price only to find out theres no milk.

Elsa was not yet old in the traditional sense, but she had lived many lifetimes. Broken enough hearts and had enough hearts be broken, both from love and friendship, to waste even more hourglass sand on the freckled book in the seat next to hers.

“No offense but I don’t really know you.”

Anna laughed, a full-bellied laugh that had her eye squeezed shut and her head tipped back against the paper covering the headrest. Elsa felt her face start to numb and fought the urge to bounce her leg. Her teeth sank into her bottom lip and she turned her head to study the trees.

“We can be train buddies while we get to know each other. Like, we might as well anyway, seeing as we’re going to be seeing a lot of each other anyways.”

Elsa didn’t turn her head, “It is a long train.”  

“Yes and no, the length? Sure. But there’s the cargo cars, the sleeper cars, the dining cars, the private cars, and THEN there’s the passenger cars like this one. Sooo I think I’m gucci when I say; we’ll be seeing a lot of each other.”

“Gucci?” Elsa turned, pulled by the odd choice of word. She was met with yet another smile from her unwanted companion and she regretted turning at all.

“Yeah you know, ‘it’s gucci’ or ‘it’s all good’ same thing.” Anna shrugged but otherwise didn’t move, oblivious to Elsa’s inner turmoil and discomfort, instead, she used this as an opening. Like a racer who finally found a way to pass the leader.

“So, let’s just get all the weird basic stuff out of the way. I’m Anna like I said. I’m from Tennessee, born there, lived there, and went to school there. My favorite color is green. I don’t have any pets or siblings. My parents are divorced but they kinda get along. And I fly drones and do photos for realtors. In my spare time, I like watching movies and pretending to read.”

Behind them, the child resting against his mother stirred, his muffed words, likely exaggerated, were somehow loud enough to be heard over everything else. When his mother didn’t respond, he yawned louder till she awoke will a start. Immediately the child leapt up and took off running towards the door Anna came through. Elsa feared he would open it but he waited, bouncing on his heels till his mother, groggy with sleep and not yet aware of the world, shuffled over. Together they disappeared through the door.

“Aaaand you?” Anna asked. Elsa sighed, the reprieve caused by the commotion had ended and she found herself backed into a corner. She had to at least give some answer or she feared the girl would never leave.

“I’m Elsa, I am from the East Coast. I have a master’s degree. I enjoy the color blue.”

  A few beats passed, the train clicking along the tracks. The sun was higher now, its warm beams reaching out at greedy fingers, casting golden whispers within the other girl’s braids.

“Wait, that’s it?”

“Yes.”

“I told you so much more. Are you one of the people who can’t open up and I have to ask a bunch of questions to get them to talk?”

Elsa flinched, she was one of those people. But she didn’t like being called out so directly like that.

Anna smirked, catching the flinch. “I’ll make it less of an interrogation and more of an exchange, so it’s not so scary, alright?”

Elsa nodded, it was actually a good solution to this trap she was in, as much as it pained her to admit that.

“I’m moving to San Francisco or the outskirts at least. What about you?”

“More or less, the same.”

“I have a job lined up with a big real estate firm downtown, I start at the end of the month. And you?”

“At the end of the month, I will be starting my job as well.”

Anna sighed and shifted in her seat, readying a new approach like a hunter with a spear. “So why the train?”

Elsa felt her face redden and she mumbled a quick “I just felt like it.”

And in the spear went, embedded deep within. Its jagged backwards teeth holding it in place. It wasn’t a good answer. It was a very bad answer, one that said too much without saying much at all.

“Oh come on, that’s not an answer!” Anna waited a beat for Elsa to answer before pressing further. “So I’ll ask again, why the train? And this time, no mumbling,  I need you to say it… out loud.”

Elsa exhaled through her nose. And opened her mouth to speak before closing it again. She was at the crossroads of telling a stranger a lie or speaking the truth into existence for the first time. Giving a name to the shadow of guilt that hung over her, maybe it would let go and take with it this spear. Maybe still the light that so gently clung, in a smooth loving caress to Anna’s skin would, if only for a moment, grant her one kiss of its warmth. And so she chose the path, and took a deep breath, and pushed forward.

“I left my husband at the altar. I packed as much as I could into a few pieces of luggage, and hopped on the first train headed west.”

For once, since their meeting, Anna was quiet and Elsa suddenly felt the need to fill the silence.

“I left him my car and anything I didn’t pack, like the dog and my piano. I quit my pointless job as an actuarial analyst via email right before I boarded the train.”

Anna exhaled loudly and blinked purposely a few times before speaking, “You.. wow. Just left everything behind huh?”

“I wanted to get out of town quickly. I couldn’t breathe.” Elsa tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“So you chose probably the slowest mode of transportation to go across the entire country, just because you ‘felt like it’?”

“I figured it would be a fun adventure and give me time to think.”

Anna laughed, “You mean to brood?”

“I didn’t say that”

“Come on Elsa, you weren’t seriously going to mope and look dramatically out the window for 2 weeks were you?”

“Well, when you put it like that, I guess not.”

“Meaning, yes Anna I was but you called me out on it and now I don’t know what to say. Right?”

Elsa made a face, she had known this woman for less than an hour and she was already so far in her head that Elsa might as well charge her rent. But saying her, what she now saw as reckless and impulsive plan, out loud was freeing.

She felt warmth on the back of her neck and turned back to the window to see the sunlight set fire to a field of corn. Brown wispy tops of long green stocks danced in waves, long endless rows bent and swayed. A lone tree in the middle of the field broke the pattern, the stalks that had come to worship at its feet paid the price for being in the shade. They were shorter and more sparse, yet the further from the tree, the more they grew. The further away from the city, the train went, the more Elsa felt like those corn stalks away from the tree.

  +++

The dining car was busier, packed full of life and people. All of whom were in various states of dress. Some sporting loose-fitting sweats, wiping sleep from their eyes. Others in formal business attire, already on their third cup of coffee and 7th morning briefing. The clicking of their keyboards and monotone voices of video calls faded into the conglomerate of sounds contained in the frankly small space.

“Can I get you ladies anything this morning?” a younger woman in uniform asked, she placed two small, single-page menus in front of Elsa and Anna, who each sat on opposite sides of a small booth.

“A coffee and some toast, please.” Elsa handed the menu back, she hadn’t bothered looking, it was a simple basic order that she never struggled to find anywhere she went.

“Umm,” Anna on the other hand was scanning the menu up and down, trying to decide. “Orange juice and a coffee and a bagel with butter instead of cream cheese. Please!” the woman smiled and took her menu, continuing down the row.

It wasn’t long before the food and drinks arrived. Elsa put one sugar in her coffee and sipped it slowly. Outside the large, clean, windows of the dining car, there were vast sprawling fields. It had been only a few days since Anna became her companion and nearly that entire time, the train had seemed to be continually chugging through the same boring field. So much for seeing the country.

Anna dumped several packets of sugar and a few creams into her coffee before taking a large swig and chasing the hot liquid with orange juice. She made a face and busied herself with her bagel.

This is how their mornings went, and it was a comfortable enough routine.

+++

“So listen,” Anna said. They were back in their seats in the passenger car. “The next stop is going to be a long one, apparently there’s a delay further up the tracks and they’re holding us at this next station for a few hours.”

“Yes, I know this. I heard the announcement too.” Elsa mused

“Yeah ok but listen, they said 4 plus hours right? So I googled things around there and I found this!” she handed Elsa her phone, on it was a photo of a waterfall with text below that mentioned a hiking trail.

“I don’t hike, plus I don’t think we have time anyway.” “We wouldn’t BUT! This,” she jabbed the phone screen. “Is a 10-minute walk from the station. See it’s part of a hiking trail but the station itself is a rest stop for the trail. So we’re going.”

There was that commanding presence coming out again. If the waterfall was so close to the station itself, Anna did have a point. So Elsa agreed.

An hour or so later they were stepping off the train onto a dusty brick platform. To call this a station was being generous. There was a small building, which contained two single restrooms, and one vending machine that looked like it hadn’t been serviced in years.

A soft hand grabbed Elsa’s forearm and she found herself being pulled away from the building and towards the beaten path to the waterfall.

+++

“You know, when I left home. No one checked on me. No one text or calls. Not even from my would-be husband.”

“Not text or even a Facebook message?”

“Nope.” Elsa left out a sigh. “I’m not surprised honestly. People say I’m difficult to get to know. At the wedding, the bride’s side was nearly empty. The few people over there just sat there because the groom’s side was full and they wanted a better view.”

Anna picked up a small pebble and tossed it into the stream, it made a soft plop sound before sinking below the surface. “Why did you guys want to get married then?”

“Well,” Elsa chewed on her lower lip for a moment before answering. “When you’re in business people expect things from you. It’s incredibly outdated and sexist too. But you’re expected to have a wife or a husband, expected to have children, expected to own a home, or at least rent somewhere nice. Have a good, clean car, new tech, nice clothes. All those things.”

She paused to copy Anna’s move with the pebble but missed the water completely, the small stone disappearing somewhere in the woods.

“We met at a company gathering and didn’t hate each other. Our drinks were the same, we watched the same evening news, had the same mild interest in the local sports team. It was enough to bolster a conversation. We started dating a few weeks later.”

“What about the wedding?”

Elsa laughed or at least made a sound that was like a laugh. “We had been dating for 2 years. And when I saying dating, I mean we were each other’s plus one to events, and we had dinner together at the nice restaurants. He was up for a promotion, asked if I wanted to get married and I agreed.”

“Wait what, he didn’t romantically propose?”

“No, we were never really intimate. A kiss here and there, maybe a night over to relieve stress. But if I’m honest, we spent most of our time apart and doing our own thing.”

Anna picked up a stick and picked at the bark, her brows pulled together and the ghost of a frown on her face.

“Did you love him?” she asked quietly

Elsa didn’t answer right away, choosing instead to turn her attention to the waterfall. Finally, after a few long minutes of silence, she answered. “No. No, I didn’t love him. And I would bet everything I own that he didn’t love me either.”

This time Anna sighed and scooted closer to Elsa. “You deserve to be loved, Elsa.”

“I’m not sure I even know what love is.”

Anna stood and walked in front of her field of view. Hands on her hips. “Sure you do!”

Elsa responded by standing and making a face.

“Elsa love isn’t a contract, it’s not a business proposal. It’s work and it’s hard but it also good and warm. Love is telling someone about your day and them listening and offering advice. Love is watching a movie together and laughing at the stupid parts. Love is holding someone while they’re sick and telling them dumb jokes to make them feel better. Love is a lot of things, but what love isn’t is convenient.”

“He was very convenient…”

“But was he love?”

“No.”

Anna reached out and took Elsa’s hand, giving it a light squeeze. “It’s okay, you know? You’re going to be okay. Fresh coast, fresh start.”

“Fresh coast, fresh start?” Elsa repeated, confused.

“Yeah, you’re moving to the West Coast, fresh coast, to start anew, fresh start.”

“Fresh coast, fresh start.” Elsa said again, “You know what, I like that.”

Anna beamed and that warm feeling prickled on the back of Elsa’s neck again.

+++

“So we have the colors all picked out, purple and green. And my dress is white but it’s ever so slightly green like it will catch the light, it’s so pretty.” Anna said. They were back in the dining car, having just finished dinner. About a week had passed since the waterfall adventure and train was rolling again. This time outside the window the fields were broken by large rocks and streams. Anna had her phone out, swiping through photos of her wedding prep.

“You sound excited,” Elsa commented, taking a sip of wine.

“Oh, I am! It’s going to be a lot of fun…” Anna looked up suddenly and stared right at Elsa. “You should come!”

“You don’t have to invite me.”

“Oh please, we’re like practically sisters at this point. Like I know what brand of tampon you used and I know that you snore when you sleep.”

“That’s… that’s a weird thing to know.”

“Elsa, everyone snores, pay attention, I’m forwarding you the rsvp so you can fill out what type of food you want.”

Elsa had to smile as she pulled out her phone to answer the email. “What a strange trip this has been. One day I’m running from my own wedding, and now I’m getting invited to a stranger’s.”

“Not a stranger, a friend,” Anna added, smiling warmly.

“A friend,” Elsa repeated, genuinely returning Annan’s smile.

“You know I was just sitting in the dining car, having a coffee and playing a pointless game on my phone. When I suddenly just felt this pull to leave. And I followed it blindly till I saw you. Then it’s like everything clicked. I think we were meant to find each other.”

Elsa was quiet for some time, considering this. Anna had swooped into her field of vision and hadn’t left since. And for once she didn’t mind the company. That warm feeling was back and with it, Elsa found herself agreeing. “I think we were meant to find each other too.”

+++

In the morning they would be arriving in San Francisco and would be going their separate ways. It was likely they wouldn’t see each other again. Sure, they had exchanged numbers - but in a city of 3 million people, it was easy to lose a single soul.

She didn’t want to lose Anna though. This blaze of a woman who dared to knock down Elsa’s walls with a bulldozer. She had never really had a close friend, and as Anna, asleep on her shoulder, stirred in response to a dream - Elsa couldn’t help but wonder if this is what it felt like to be loved.

Anna shifted, reaching out her hand, searching for something. Fingers moved with a purpose, slowly curling and uncurling until their ship reached the harbor. And she wrapped them around Elsa’s hand, holding firmly, as if she was once again reading Elsa’s mind and was too, afraid to let her go.

Elsa decided then and there, that this time would be different. This time she wouldn’t close the door on someone. She gave Anna’s hand a slight squeeze, causing Anna to nestle into the old woman’s neck.

Elsa turned to watch the lights from the city fade into the darkness of the desert. Her neck was warm and this time it traveled down and warmed her whole body. She ran a thumb over Anna’s hand and smiled.

[ramblingkat]

Fandom: Bleach

Characters/Pairing: Kurosaki Ichigo/Urahara Kisuke

Prompt: Doesn’t Realize They’ve Been Injured

I blame the UraIchi server. On general principle

Head aching, ears ringing, and an aching throb that spread across his back. The body lying twisted in a most uncomfortable position, having been thrown across a room. Kisuke knew the signs of an explosion. A part of his mind was trying to pick apart what could have caused the explosion this time. The rest was trying to process the world around him. How long had he been out, and was anything on fire? 

Something was laying on him, and he shifted to push off something heavy. It felt wooden, and Kisuke thought it might be part of the table. He needed to invest in lighter furniture. Then he registered that something was digging painfully into his chest. That was a potential danger, and he forced an eye open to see what it was. That hurt as well, dust making his eye itch as he tried to focus on….

Ichigo. 

That sudden recollection that Ichigo had been in his lab with him made him bolt upright, ignoring the way it made him ache, a flash of pain stealing his breath for a moment. He had flung himself at the other when he realized that his experiment was about to go up. Ichigo, in his fragile, -human- body. Gigai were designed to be tougher than regular human forms, even if they were modeled off them. If the explosion made Kisuke ache….

Ignoring his own pains, he checked on Ichigo, who was breathing, which was a relief. That was one thing off Kisuke’s nightmare list gone. The other stirred a bit as Kisuke checked his pulse, finding it there, steady and slow.

Closing his eyes in relief, Kisuke started the rest of his checks. No real damage to the ribs and he smiled at Ichigo as his partner opened dazed eyes. “Hey,” he said, voice rough, then turned to cough against his shoulder. There was too much dust in the air. It was making it hard to breathe. 

“Wha’ hap’n,” Ichigo slurred, looking up at Kisuke with eyes that were more dazed than he liked. Kisuke ran gentle hands through Ichigo’s hair so he could check the skull. A million horrible possibilities were flashing through his mind, and he rather hated his brain at moments like this. The wall had stopped their momentum, and neither of them was light. He couldn’t focus enough to properly do any diagnostic kaido, but he was pretty sure that nasty knot he just found was the result of Ichigo hitting the wall first. 

His chest felt tight at the idea, and he coughed again. That sent his back muscles into a spasm and pain shot through them. His back burned, but he didn’t feel the telltale sensation of blood, so Kisuke ignored it for now. 

He ran his fingers down the back of Ichigo’s neck. “Can you feel your hands and legs?” he asked, panting lightly as he tried to get a good look at Ichigo’s eyes. They seemed like the pupils were equal. But it was hard to tell when Ichigo kept looking around, not focusing on Kisuke. That distraction he didn’t like either. He was used to Ichigo being focused. 

After a moment, Ichigo seemed to register the question and nodded, fingers wiggling as he did. “What happened?” he asked again, words much clearer this time. The sense of relief nearly staggered Kisuke. He was light-headed from it and had to put a hand on the wall to keep himself from falling over from the sensation. 

“Explosion,” he said, coughing again as his chest protesting the talking. It was getting harder to breathe. He should get Ichigo out of here as soon as he confirmed that his spine was fine. Who knew what chemicals were lingering. “Dust in the air, be careful.” 

Ichigo’s eyes finally seemed to snap into focus, fixing on Kisuke. He shifted, moved to sit up, but Kisuke put a hand on his chest. “Hold still,” he said, words short as he tried to catch his breath from the last fit of coughing. Ichigo ignored him, still trying to move. 

“Kisuke, are you okay?”

That was a silly question. He had been the one to wake up first. If they should be concerned about anyone, it was the person who had been unconscious longer. “I’m fine. Just….” He trailed off into another fit of coughing, pain spiking through him again. 

One particularly violent cough sent his vision white, and then everything sliding sideways into a hazy grey. 

He could hear Ichigo talking, but it was as if from a distance, and Kisuke was trying hard to focus on breathing. It hurt, and he couldn’t think clear enough on why that was. All he could do was focus on that. After a few moments, he felt something prodding at where his back ached the most, and that got a flare of pain so strong that his brain retreated more from it. 

***

Ichigo knew that hanging out with Kisuke in a lab was a dangerous proposition. Though, usually, it was more in the line of “does touching this feel weird” sort of dangerous than explosion dangerous. But Tessai and Ururu were at a movie they’d been excited about and had dragged Jinta along with them. So it was the chance to have some nice quiet time with Kisuke. Ichigo liked the others, but they could pop up at the most...inconvenient times. 

Ichigo was happy that Yoruichi didn’t live here as well. He’d never get the chance to have sex with Kisuke if she did. That troll would make a game out of interrupting.

Explosions were now his least favorite interruption. He’d been watching with interest when Kisuke had jerked, then twisted and flung himself at Ichigo. Then the world had gone up in a flash of weird violet flames and he had seen half the table come at them before he had made contact with the wall.

Kisuke was looking grey when Ichigo had opened his eyes. It was really hard to focus, thoughts scattered and not wanting to come together. But he knew that grey was not the right color for Kisuke. Not that sort of grey.

His brain wondered when Kisuke had gotten bluish lipstick, and that was a horrible color for him. A random thought, but he knew it was important as well. That was what had snapped him back into focus, yanked all his wandering thoughts into line.

Then Kisuke had started to cough, face going pale under the grey. He gasped for air, slumping sideways.

Ichigo moved, bolting up and ignoring the way that made his head swim. He knew that sensation and dismissed it. A light concussion, but that was all. Yes, he knew he shouldn’t dismiss that, but Kisuke was struggling to breathe. 

“Kisuke,” he said, trying to get the other to wake up. He was looking the other for injuries, but when the other sagged, he focused on making sure the other kept breathing. He was, even if it was in short little gasps, and then Ichigo had called a professional. This was far outside his abilities, and it hurt to think.

Digging his phone out, Ichigo hit a number he rarely touched. 

“Dad,” he said, interrupting Isshin’s boisterous greeting. “Kisuke’s hurt.”

***

A hand in his. 

That was the first awareness that came back to him. Kisuke could feel the fingers laced with his. A familiar hand and he wondered why Ichigo was holding his hand like that. The grip was tight, and he could feel the agitation in the other’s reiatsu. 

He was on his stomach, and he could feel the warmth of kaido against his back. “Stay still,” came a familiar voice, and Kisuke blinked as he realized that Isshin was healing him. Hadn’t seen the other use kaido before, though he knew that Isshin had probably been trained. “You are both idiots.”

Ah, serious Isshin. It must have been quite serious damage. How had Kisuke missed that?

He opened his eyes and glanced up to meet Ichigo’s scowl. Ah, yes. That was how. 

Taking a breath to ask, he was cut off before he could start. “Don’t talk,” came the next order, even as Kisuke opened his mouth to ask how Ichigo was. “Ichigo is fine, other than you giving him a heart attack. I dealt with his concussion already. And now I’m fixing your ribs after I already fixed the punctured lung they gave you.”

He sounded annoyed, and Kisuke wondered just had nasty it had been to drive Isshin so far out of his normal behavior pattern. It usually took quite serious injuries to get that particular tone from him. 

The hand holding his squeezed, and he looked at Ichigo and smiled. He got a weak smiled back, and then Isshin sat back. 

“You need to take it easy it a few days,” he said. “Your reiatsu will finish the healing, and you just need some time to recover.” Isshin sounded annoyed. “Maybe have less explosions around my son.”

“Dad,” Ichigo muttered, rolling his eyes, helping Kisuke sit up. Though he didn’t move away from Kisuke until the older man took a few deeper breaths. Then Kisuke reached up to run his fingers gently though Ichigo’s hair. He didn’t feel the knot on Ichigo’s head anymore and that made him feel better. 

“Ah, Kurosaki-san, you’ve been spending time with Ishida-san,” Kisuke said, carefully as his chest ached. “You sound just like him.”

Isshin huffed at him. Then he stood. “I’m going, as I don’t need to see what Ichigo does next,” he said, sounding cheerful as he ignored Ichigo’s mortified “DAD!” “But I’m sure it’s going to involve looking you over. Seriously, don’t make me come back to help heal you again.”

Kisuke smiled at him. “Kurosaki-san. Get out of our home.”

There was a snort from Isshin, but he did leave, and Ichigo grumbled faintly. He curled forward and rested his head against Kisuke’s shoulder. “Don’t do that to me again,” Ichigo said softly, winding his arms around Kisuke and clung to him. Kisuke was still taking careful breaths, but he did return the hug. 

They could move in a bit. Right now, he just hugged Ichigo close and enjoyed the fact they were both still alive.

[cantgetoutofmyheda]

Falling in Love in a Quarantine: Part 10

OP | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 9.5

---

PART 10: Day 21 & Day 22

“This is weird,” Clarke leaned into Lexa’s hand that was wrapped around her. For the first time ever, she was actually thankful of her nightshift the day prior—after what happened the previous morning, neither woman was sure of what would be moving too fast or too slow, but the nightshift was a good buffer for that.

Lexa stiffened, “Oh, sorry. We don’t have to–”

“No, no,” Clarke reached for Lexa’s arm to stay draped around her shoulder. “Sorry. I just meant that I can’t believe this is happening.”

“Oh,” Lexa nodded. “Yeah, me too.”

“I’m happy it is,” Clarke rested her head on Lexa’s shoulder.

“Me too,” Lexa placed a gentle kiss on top of her head. “Did you sleep okay?”

“Mhmm,” Clarke hummed. “It’s astounding how my sleep schedule isn’t as fucked up as it should be, though. What time is it?”

Lexa looked down at her phone, “3:30.”

“Enough time for a movie before you have to start making my dinner,” Clarke suggested.

Lexa rolled her eyes, “You know, it’s basically like we’ve been dating this whole time minus the kissing and the leg humping.”

“Lexa!” Clarke sat up. “Ugh, can you seriously at least give me two weeks to recover from that?”

Lexa laughed as she reached to pull Clarke back in. She traced a finger down her jaw, stopping at her chin and hooking her face upwards. When she finally brought their lips together, she felt Clarke exhale.

“It was an incredible turn on, Clarke,” Lexa whispered against her lips, before connecting them again.

“Mmm,” Clarke relaxed. “Whatever you say.”

Unspoken words were shared through soft and sweet kisses. The two had talked a bit more before Clarke had to head to work the previous day, but there were still so many things that had been left unsaid, so many things both were left to wonder with. But this—being together the way they both wanted to be, though at a tentative pace, just felt right.

Lexa moved her hands to Clarke’s sides, pulling for her towards her. Quickly, Clarke moved to exactly where she knew Lexa wanted her. She was now situated on Lexa’s lap—her legs were suddenly straddled around Lexa’s and their mouths moved together to deepen the kiss. The kiss was hungrier than any they’ve shared in the past two days. It was fast, lips were being nipped at, hands were roaming.

It wasn’t until Lexa finally broke the contact, resting her forehead against Clarke’s and put her hand on the blonde’s chest to slow things down. “Clarke,” she said between short breaths. “Is this taking things slow?”

Clarke sighed, “Probably not. But do we have to?” She leaned in for another kiss in which Lexa willingly obliged.

“We’re moving at the pace of two horny teenages,” Lexa smiled against the lips that were hungrily engulfing hers again. “Not that I’m complaining,” She added, taking another breath. “Just calling it out.”

Clarke sat up, still in Lexa’s lap, and looked her in the eye, “Who cares about taking things slow? Fuck it.”

“It was your idea,” Lexa raised a brow. “I was just obliging by your rules.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and let out a defeated sigh. She dismounted from her position, climbing back to Lexa’s side where she was originally sitting, “Fine, fine. Slow is better. Test the waters. Make sure we don’t ruin our friendship.”

“What’s the worst that could happen, anyway?” Lexa smirked. “We have awkward and awful sex, can’t look each other in the eye for a few days, and then I move back into my apartment?”

“That sounds about right,” Clarke sighed again, at the thought. As badly as she wanted Lexa—wanting to really feel her, wanting Lexa to unravel, the worst-case-scenario scared the living shit out of her. “Put a movie on,” she commanded. “And stop with the talk of you leaving, my brain can’t even compute that.”

“Aye aye, captain,” Lexa pretended to salute. “Your wish is my command.”

---

“There goes my weekend off,” Clarke rolled her eyes as she set her phone down on the table.

Lexa put her fork down, “You’re getting called into work?”

“No,” Clarke sighed, taking another bite of the pasta. “Mom wants us over to grill tomorrow. She realized that it’s the first weekend we both have off at the same time.”

“What if we already had plans?” Lexa questioned.

She was met with a blank stare from Clarke, “Oh, yeah.” Clarke scoffed, “Big plans during a quarantine.” She pretended to type back, “Sorry, mom. Lexa and I are doing a bar and restaurant crawl with all of our friends tomorrow. Can’t come.”

“Jerk,” Lexa rolled her eyes as she took a quick bite of food. “What’s wrong with going to your mom’s anyway? I miss Abby, haven’t seen her in ages.”

“Maybe I just wanted to spend my day off making out with you on the couch,” Clarke shrugged. “But if you’d rather hang with my mom, then we can do that.”

“As lovely as an all-day makeout sounds, Clarke,” Lexa smirked. “We should probably go.”

“You’re probably right.”

“I am.”

---

“There are my girls,” Abby greeted them with the biggest smile and arms wide open. “Clarke, honey,” she looked to her daughter. “Why haven’t you come sooner?” She turned to Lexa, “And Lexa, it’s been far too long, dear.”

Lexa was first to make her way to the woman, “Clarke’s been keeping me prisoner.” She smirked back at Clarke with her exaggeration, “This is the first time she’s let me out in public. But I’m glad it’s to see you.”

“You’re such a kiss-ass,” Clarke murmured, loud enough for both to hear her. “And sorry that I’m the responsible one trying to keep everyone safe.” 

“Clarke,” Abby scolded. “Lexa is quarantining with a doctor who is in and out of a hospital everyday. I’d imagine I’m being as safe about this as you are, there’s no reason for you two to not be able to come here.”

“Well we’re here now,” Clarke shrugged, before finally walking up to the two. “Hi, mom.”

“Come inside,” Abby waved them in. “Lexa, I have the grill fired up and the food prepared. Would you do the honors?”

“Mom,” Clarke whined. “You’re putting her to work? You invited us here.”

Lexa brushed Clarke off, “You know I’d love to. Your daughter doesn’t even have a grill, this is going to be quite a treat.”

Clarke rolled her eyes at Abby’s knowing smirk and finally followed them both into the house towards the kitchen.

---

“Clarke,” Lexa called out from behind the grill. “We should really get one of these, it’ll be a game changer for dinners when you’re not working nights.”

“We?” Abby asked her daughter in a whisper with a raised brow.

Clarke shrugged her mom off and called back out to Lexa from her seat under the patio umbrella, “If you want it, you buy it.”

“What about a small table and chairs for the deck?” Lexa asked. Her focus was on flipping the pieces of chicken on the grill, getting the perfect grill marks.

“Sure,” Clarke called out again. “You’re buying, though.”

“But it’s your house,” Lexa replied.

“You’re the one that wants them, Lexa,” Clarke waved her off and turned back to Abby. She was met with prying eyes and immediately felt the need to defend herself, “What?”

“Nothing, dear,” Abby sipped her iced tea. “So I take it that it’s been going well having Lexa around?”

“It’s been great,” Clarke relaxed into her seat. “She’s been so helpful with Sandy and I’m sure you can imagine what she’s been cooking every week.”

“Yes,” Abby nodded. “You’ve sent many pictures. Looks like you’re being very well taken care of, which I’m happy about.”

“Well,” Clarke smiled. “It’s Lexa. Of course.”

“Of course,” Abby agreed, turning around to watch Lexa prepare their lunch.

---

“The chicken is magnificent, Lexa,” Abby smiled at her. The three were seated at the table on the porch, enjoying the nice weather and the food that Lexa had just set down.

“You prepared it,” Lexa laughed. “I just grilled it, but thanks. And thanks for having us,” she said while looking around at the backyard. “The change of scenery is nice.”

“You two haven’t seen any of your other friends?” Abby asked.

“Mom,” Clarke started. “Of course not. I’m at the hospital so much, I can’t chance passing any germs on to anyone.”

“Except for Lexa?” Abby quipped.

Lexa laid eyes on Clarke and showed an endearing smile, “It was my choice to go to Clarke’s.” She finally shifted her gaze to Abby, “I knew what I was gonna be in for, but just wanted to help her out around the house and with Sandy and everything.”

“You know, Lexa,” Abby started. “You’ve always looked out for Clarke, no matter what. I’m so grateful that she has someone like you in her life.”

“She’s my best friend,” Lexa shrugged. “I love her.”

Clarke tilted her head to the side at the sound of the words and couldn’t help but send a bashful smile in Lexa’s direction.

Abby took keen notice of the interaction, looking between the two sharing longing glances and fleeting smiles, “Well, I’m happy you both have each other. All feels right when you two are together.”

Lexa exhaled, acutely aware of the tone of the conversation, “So, Clarke. About that grill…”

“Lex, if you want one then buy it,” Clarke shrugged. “I don’t care.”

“Excellent,” Lexa smiled. “It’s getting delivered tomorrow. Thank heavens for next-day delivery.” Lexa took a bite of potato salad and chewed it before adding, “Along with a table, chairs, and umbrella.”

“Are you kidding me?” Clarke set her cutlery down. “Lexa.”

“What?” Lexa smirked. “You said I could buy it if I wanted,” she replied back, before turning her attention to Abby. “She said that, didn’t she? You heard her, Abby.”

“She’s right, dear,” Abby laughed in Clarke’s direction. “That’s the lesson I learned with your father. I stopped telling him that he could do something if I didn’t really want him to.”

“Two very different situations, mom,” Clarke tried to deflect. “Plus, whenever Lexa goes back to her apartment, I’ll be stuck having to keep everything clean and tidy all on my lonesome.”

“Clarke,” Abby offered. “Something tells me Lexa will be there for a lot longer.”

Clarke’s mind went into overdrive, potentially even a slight panic, “Mom, before you say anything, we–”

“Because of the quarantine, Clarke,” Lexa interrupted, sensing her spiral. “And Abby, what I think Clarke is trying to say is that we’re just taking me being a squatter at her house on a weekly basis. Watching how many confirmed cases there are and what the state of the economy is going to be like. Once I hear from my office on when they’re opening back up again, we’ll start to assess when I go back home.”

Clarke blankly blinked, then shot Lexa a thankful glance, “Right. Yes. That’s what I was going to say.”

“Oh-kay,” Abby nodded—her mother’s intuition had already given her an inkling, but Clarke’s reaction and Lexa coming to her defense was enough to solidify her thoughts. “Well regardless, it’s nice you two are navigating this together.”

[sanemreid]

tehlikeli oyun. — self para.

( feat. the spawn of satan elliott langham )

After locking up the studio — which hadn’t happened until a good little while beyond actually closing up for the day from classes and lessons, not uncommon for her to be the last one out whether staying late because of business related things, or simply to take advantage of the serene atmosphere to work on routines. Tonight’s reasoning stemming from the former — she’d popped over to her previous home in Goldfinch to asses a few things before officially putting it on the market. Would there have been a better time in the day to do this ? Probably, however this week proved to be busy for a myriad of reasons, thus for her this so happened to be the best allotted free moment, at least just to do an initial sweep. Luckily enough too her sister was out of town for a job so it could really just be a quick pop in. Regardless if she didn’t have a current ETA on the when she'd have it up for sale, more than likely after the wedding, she still wanted to be sure in the case anything might’ve needed to get revamped, it could get done sooner rather than later. 

 Truthfully though the place was in fairly as peak condition as it’d ever been since she lived here, plus the youngest of the Bayrak clan seemed to have the same trait of immaculate upkeep. The basement was probably the only feature that may need attention, seeing as it’d remained partially unfinished this whole time. Making her way downstairs after grabbing a forgotten item from the move into the manor, the plan was to raid the kitchen before actually heading home, when a knock resonated through an otherwise steady silence, halted Sanem on the second to last step. Weird. She’d hadn’t expected anyone obviously, maybe it was one of Damla’s friends, but wouldn’t she have mentioned she’d be gone. Maybe it really was old Edith coming back to haunt her. Brows furrow with a slight perplexity before continuing her movements, this time towards the entrance, another knock came halfway.

Opening the door – not fully – she was first able to catch a glimpse of the figure opposite’s profile against the front light, more features coming into view as he turned. There’d been an indistinct familiarity that the dancer was now trying to rack her brain over, all the while as his own vision landed on her a grin spread over his features that unnervingly could only rival the Cheshire cat. ❝ Sanem, hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time, ❞ Beginning with a tone that was saturated with far too much pleasantry, especially in the way her name fell. He knew her and yet she didn’t or — did she ? ❝ Mind if I come in, it’s kind of cold standing out here. ❞ Words fly in one ear and out the other as she continued to search for how and where she possibly knew him. Then like the cogs of a machine did the wheels start slowly clicking things into place, it might’ve been almost a year ago, but deep within her memory did she place him, outside the courthouse when she’d waited for Allison after a case. When she first laid eyes upon none other than the ghost himself.

Elliott fucking Langham.

Second passes when the realization hits, that she’s immediately moving to slam the door in his face, but is stopped before it can happen, his hand catching and pushes it along with herself, essentially shoving his way inside. ❝ Now that was just rude, here I thought we could just have a little talk. Guess there’s no need for formal introductions either then. ❞

Fleetingly stunned; she stood her ground just a short distance from him, almost rigidly on guard, arms crossing tightly over her chest. Attempting to keep calm though that bubbling ire was igniting beneath her skin, while he appeared rather cool and collected. ❝ Not sure what we possibly have to talk about — not unless it’s how you decided to force your way in here, ❞ A pause as dark hues narrow. ❝ Or maybe, you wanna talk about how you’ve been stalking around, making ominous phone calls like some d-list movie villain. Otherwise I suggest you walk back out the door and all the way to whichever hole you slithered out from. Better yet, straight into the ocean, please do the world a favor. ❞

One corner of his mouth twitched upwards, as if he merely felt amusement in every syllable uttered, smugness radiating the atmosphere around them. ❝ They were certainly right about you — you know you should be a little more respectful to the people who are supposedly about to become family, in what, a couple weeks now is it. ❞ nonchalantly his eyes dart around the interior as he speaks, inspecting, or more probably scrutinizing. All she could do was scoff, no surprise in the slightest to hear Rachel and Christopher were in the mix in conjuncture to him. Contempt curls on his features briefly as his line of sight returns to her. ❝ You’re a smart girl.. well, enough that I’m sure you already know what, or who, we need to discuss. I’ve been very considerate with Allison, letting her have her fun with — whatever this is, but now my patience is starting to grow a little thin. ❞

Again she hears his voice but she doesn’t listen, at least not anything beyond her partners name rolling off his tongue, sending a bristling sensation down her spine as embers ignite into full flames behind her stare. If only looks could kill. ❝ Don’t you ever fucking say her name again, ❞ She spat venomously first, a warning while she took a step closer. It may not have been the best idea to create a smaller gap between them, but the more her emotional level steadily rose, the less better judgement crossed through her mind. ❝ Let me be as clear to you as I was to them, there is nothing for us to discuss, much less my fiancée. I don’t care what kind of plan you have cooked up, or how you think attaching yourself to Christopher and Rachel like a parasite is gonna help and I’m just assuming you’re here because they ran and told you how mean I was to them at the gala. You won’t be getting anywhere near her again, I’m sure you’re smart enough to understand that. But maybe not, I mean really how pathetic do you have to be to resort to playing these games— ❞ One by one the words cascaded away from her like lava towards his direction, hoping to slowly engulf and vaporize his existence. 

Perhaps if she hadn’t been so focused on that, she might’ve caught the shift in his demeanor, to an extent her proclamation was working, maybe too well. It happened in the flash, before she could even react to Elliott’s movements, one hand reached out easily to clasp around her neck. While she feebly attempted to pry his arm away, he kept firm, sending her backwards till she was pinned against the nearest wall, wincing a bit as the back of her head made a thud. Sanem could feel his palm pressing against her trachea, though not quite hard enough to cut the airflow. Glint of fear was overcast by a grim determination not to give him the satisfaction of seeing. ❝ Has anyone ever told you, you have too much of a smart mouth for your own good. It’s cute what you’re trying to do but it’s only making things more difficult, and that’s over now. You really think you and that little dance studio are good enough ? I know what’s best for her I can give her the life she deserves. Allison is just a little confused, and I’m simply here to remind her of that, how good it was before, how we loved each other. ❞ Possessively menacing did he spit back.

Snorted laugh involuntarily erupts from her throat, humorless – mostly at least, because was he being serious, did he not hear himself right now ? Judging from the expression though he certainly wasn’t expecting to garner that reaction. ❝ You really are warped, ❞ Retorting against a partly strained voice. ❝ That’s not love, you sadistic fuck, that’s control. Of course you don’t know the difference... all you ever did and keep doing is hurt her, but you won’t have that power over her anymore. She is so much stronger and better than you know.. threatening me is only gonna make her hate you more.. ❞

Now; if just stepping closer had been a terrible idea, then antagonizing him was surely an even worse call — made evident by his grip squeezing harder as soon as the last declaration left her mouth. Was he just desperate or truly unhinged, both seemed the most plausible. Sanem never considered herself a fighter, not in the physical sense, in fact anytime her fight or flight response kicked in it almost always veered towards the latter. Nor had never found herself in this sort of situation before. Though in the same vein, she wasn’t clueless or weak, and if that’s the assumption he’d been under, the it was one on the list of mistakes made coming here. Adrenaline rushed through her system, induced by a mixture of fear and fury, between the belittlement that came from him and the Hawthorne parents, but importantly the negligent grief they all imposed on Alli. 

There was a futile attempt to pry his hand away, so in a less than thought out, survival instinct way, she reached out to grab his face, digging her nails in, before wildly kicking out a leg that made contact with some part of his body. Less than graceful but worked to release her as he stumbled back with a harsh groan, gasping for a breath while in the process of commotion did her temple managed to clip against a shelf. Hissing and silently cursing her choice of décor momentarily. Glancing towards him with sharp intakes of air, hazardous ire still beamed off both, but including her tempestuous emotional state, it drove Sanem to ball a tight fist and strike it across his face. Did the connection send an ache through her hand, yes, but it was worth it still. ❝ Stay the fuck away from us ! ❞ Shouting at the top of raspy vocals before taking the opportunity had to go for her phone sitting in the living room. 

She’d fully expected him to be close behind, but managing to secure the device her line of sight peered up, frantically glancing around to find no one. Scrolling through the contacts, in the back of her mind ebbed the notion that she should call the lawyer — knowing she would have to tell her no matter what — but aware of the frenzy it’d only send her in at the moment. Instead tapping the next name to flash in her mind, who’d luckily lived in this very neighborhood now, Lily. Shakily putting the phone up to her ear, she took tentative steps back towards the entrance, Elliott, for all she’d been aware, was gone, leaving just an idly open door, and affrighted Sanem, in his wake.

[alex-ruins-everything]

Being Human - Chapter 2

A werewolf, a vampire, and a ghost live in the same home together, going about their lives and cherishing the little spooky safe haven they have created for themselves. Until they get a new roommate who knows nothing of the monster world or what he's gotten himself into. Read the whole thing on ao3 here.

Roman would be the first to admit that his current situation was a little...strange. He had somehow ended up living with a married couple, but mostly...he found he didn’t mind it. The Doc was a little intimidating, but he seemed to always be at work so Roman rarely saw him. Patton was around much more often, but Patton was an absolute delight. Hell, Patton packed him lunches with good luck notes for audtion days. Roman was absolutely feeling spoiled, even if he assured the other that he didn’t have to do such things. It was an odd thing to think about his new roommates, but he felt like he had found a place he could feel welcomed in for more than just what he was, but rather for who he was.

His move-in day had gone great, but the second day Logan had given him the list of rules. Like...a physical list so he wouldn’t forget. The basement is locked because there’s nothing down there he needs to see. The shed is off limits because apparently Logan keeps some sorta hobby shit in there that’s super valuable. He was also warned about all the weird noises the house could make on account of its age. Roman found out very quickly that the house did make a lot of spooky noises, almost like it was haunted. Which was ridiculous because he knew ghosts weren’t real so that should be a calming thought. Right? It mostly reminded him of all the weird noses that would ring out back home, usually caused by his brother’s antics. Though, thinking of home was something Roman tried not to do too often.

He had his new home now! Someplace he was okay with coming back to after a long shift at the diner, Thai takeout in hand since Patton had said he wouldn’t be home to make dinner tonight. Apparently it was date night for him and Logan. Roman was more than okay with alone time. He had evening plans to watch a few Disney movies, loudly sing along to every song, and maybe search for a few auditions somewhere in between. He was humming to himself, digging his key out of his jacket pocket and turning it in the lock, flipping on a few lights once inside. The sound of the TV could be heard from the living room...Patton must have forgotten to turn it off before he left. Roman of course recognized the sounds of the Nightmare Before Christmas, it was a classic. Guess he was starting his marathon there.

He had planned to change into some pajamas before settling for the night but the sound of Jack Skellington singing about Christmas was far too tempting to ignore, so he took his takeout to the living room, pausing in shock at what he saw. There was someone sitting on the couch. Someone he had never seen before. The guy couldn’t have been much younger than Roman himself, but he paid the other no attention, eyes focused on the screen as he mouthed the lyrics to himself. He was pale as a ghost with heavy dark shadows under his eyes and stringy bangs that hung down in his face. Eventually he did spare Roman a glance, a confused look crossing his face when he realized Roman was staring right at him.

“Can you-” the guy started, backing into the couch for a second. Roman could have sworn he went through the cushions.

Roman didn’t get a chance to hear the rest of what the guy was gonna say because he dropped his takeout on the floor and went right back out the front door, dialing Patton’s number on his phone. Patton didn’t pick up the first three calls so he tried Logan, knowing the more serious man was always checking his phone in case the hospital called. Logan picked up on the second ring.

“Roman? Do you need something?” he asked, the sounds of a restaurant humming in the background.

“A guy- on the couch-,” Roman started, glancing back at the door in case this intruder decided to follow him and off him. Not that he couldn’t take the skinny guy in a fight, but who knew what dangers the other guy held.

“There was a guy on our couch?” Logan asked, his tone ever so slightly confused. Patton could be heard in the background saying hi.

“I came home from work and this really pale guy was just sitting on the couch watching the TV and then he looked at me all weird and I left.”

“Pale...oh my,” Logan said. “Hold on, Roman. I’m going to call you back in a few minutes, I’m being asked to stop using my phone in the restaurant. You aren’t in any danger, I assure you.”

Roman wasn’t too convinced, but before he could protest Logan had hung up. He glanced back at the front door with a frown before moving to the backyard, sitting on the bench by Patton’s garden. A few minutes later his phone rang again and he saw Logan’s contact name on the screen.

“So? You know the guy?” he asked.

“Yes. That’s Virgil. He’s another roommate, but he’s been away for a long time and hadn’t said when he was coming back. I suppose he wanted to surprise us. I’m terribly sorry for any confusion,” Logan replied. “Patton and I will be on our way home as soon as I pay the check.”

“Right, okay,” Roman said. “Should I go back inside?”

“There’s no reason for you not to. We’ll see you soon.”

With that Logan hung up again and Roman frowned into the lettuce bed before getting up off the bench. Well, so much for his nice happy evening alone. He made his way back inside, the other guy - Virgil - was no longer on the couch. His takeout was still on the floor so he picked that up and went to the kitchen to see if anything could be salvaged. He was untying the bag on the counter when he saw the reflection of another person behind him in the window.

“Holy- you’re quite silent, aren’t you?” Roman gasped, turning around to face the other.

“Yeah...I guess you could say that,” Virgil replied, looking at him like he was some sort of anomaly.

“Well I do apologize for our first meeting being..that. I’m Roman.”

“Yeah, I know,” Virgil said, pausing. “I mean, uh...Pat’s told me about you. He said you’re loud.”

“He did…?” Roman asked, having heard no such complaint from Patton himself. “Him and Logan will be home soon.”

“Good. I’m going to my room,” Virgil said, turning around to leave.

“And where is that?”

“The attic.”

Ah, yes. The attic. Another one of the places on the list that Roman wasn’t supposed to snoop around. He saw Virgil walk towards the hall where the door covering the staircase to the attic was but he didn’t hear the door open. Odd. Regardless of the weird feeling the other roommate gave him, his stomach growling was far more prominent, and he was happy to see none of his food spilled when he had dropped it. Roman took a seat at the breakfast table, happy to hear the door open and see Patton and Logan walk in.

“Roman! So sorry for the spook, are you alright?” Patton asked, immediately rushing forward for a hug. Patton was fond of hugs and Roman happily stood to give him one.

“Where is Virgil?” Logan asked, looking around the space.

“He went up to the attic,” Roman answered, pulling out of Patton’s grip. “He’s a little...uh…”

“Awesome?” Patton finished, watching Logan walk off towards the attic door.

“Yeah, sure.”

“Sorry we didn’t mention him sooner. We didn’t think it was going to be an issue,” Patton apologized, taking a seat at the breakfast table and taking off his cardigan.

“Not to worry, Padre. Just a little fright to get the blood pumping,” Roman waved it off, going back to his lukewarm food.

“I know it doesn’t go too well with noodles, but I’m in the mood for some coco. D’you want a mug?”

“I would love one. I think I’m pretty much done with these anyway,” Roman smiled, putting the lid back on the takeout container.

Patton made him his coco as he stuck his leftovers in the fridge to be heated up next time he wanted Thai food. Logan came down from the attic and assured him that everything was handled and that Virgil was back to stay for now. He then gave Patton a kiss on the cheek and retreated back to the basement where apparently he had very important work to do.

“So...any other secret roommates I should know about?” Roman asked, plucking a marshmallow out of the mug before it could sink into the coco.

“Nope! Just the one...and he isn’t much of a people person,” Patton assured.

Roman finished his coco, conversing with Patton about idle things like work and how he’s looking for auditions again and the other man’s fear of spiders. Eventually he couldn’t hold back his yawn and headed back up to his room thinking once again how strange everything was around here. Strange...but good.

[oliviaischillin1204]

teach me how

Pairings: Romantic Intrulogical

Word Count: 4,405

Warnings: brief reference to sex, v brief reference to non consensual kissing

don’t got nothing to say for this, it was just a fun idea i had!

In Logan’s defense, there was really no way for him to see this coming.

He and Remus had been planning on spending the day in bed together. Remus had made sure to announce this fact loudly at breakfast, causing Roman to gag into his bowl of cereal as Remus began to describe in detail what exactly he and Logan would be doing all day.

Well. There was some truth to what Remus had said. But really, they had spent most the day curled up under the covers together, watching true crime documentaries and murder mystery movies. Nothing says romance like a cheesy severed head or some aesthetically pleasing blood splatters on the camera lens.

At the moment, Logan was trying to pay attention to the TV, but he found himself rather distracted by the feeling of Remus’ legs intertwined with his own. The creative side could hardly sit still if his life depended on it, and even now he slowly and rhythmically shifted one leg back and forth, rubbing against Logan’s shin with his own. Apart from the occasional leg hair geting pulled by accident, Logan found his lover’s warm touch to be hugely comforting, to the point where he found himself struggled not to fall asleep in Remus’ embrace.

He had just snapped his head up for the third time in five minutes when Remus laughed.

“Gettin’ sleepy, Teach?”

“Only because you’re so boring.” Logan smirked at Remus’ affronted gasp.

“Ouch, Lo! Who taught you how to give a comeback?”

“I’ve learned from the best,” Logan replied, bringing a hand up to cup Remus’ cheek.

The creative side blinked wildly for a moment before pushing Logan’s hand away, a rare blush covering his face.

“Why’d you have to be all yucky and sentimental? Now all I wanna do it kiss your dumb face.”

“I certainly wouldn’t complain.”

The two leaned forward without another word, pressing their lips together in a kiss just this side of decent. It was Logan who pulled away, smirking at his boyfriend.

“Are you even attempting to pay attention to the movie?”

Remus’ jaw dropped. “Me? You’re the one that fell asleep! Besides,” he continued, “isn’t this much more fun?”

He leaned back in to kiss Logan again, but the logical side turned his head away.

Unfortunately, Remus redirected his kiss directly into the crook of Logan’s neck.

Logan felt his entire body jerk in response.

“Remus!” He said, his voice going suspiciously high pitched. “No!”

“No what? You don’t like my kisses?” Remus asked, placing another, and another, and another on Logan’s neck. He wrapped his arms around Logan’s torso, keeping him from squirming away.

Logan struggled a bit in his grip, feeling laughter bubble up in his throat. “Stop!”

Logan hadn’t meant to actually say that, but before he could even realize what he’d said, Remus had let him go and pulled away completely.

“I’m sorry.”

Logan blinked, a little dazed at the sudden mood change. “What?”

Remus groaned. “Don’t make me say it again, you know I hate that shit.” He fiddled with the bedspread for a moment before continuing, “I didn’t realize you wanted me to actually stop. I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable.”

Logan didn’t respond, his eyes wide. Remus shuddered.

“God, is that what it’s like being considerate for other’s feelings? So weird.”

“No, no, Remus, you’re fine!” Logan blurted belatedly, causing his partner to shoot him a quizzical look. He faltered for a moment, mouth opening and closing like a fish.

“I- I have something I want to tell you, as my partner,” he managed, willing himself not to blush. He had thought about telling Remus sooner, but he’d been too worried about how his boyfriend would respond. But they had been together for a while now, and despite Logan’s long list of quirks, Remus had never made him feel less than because of them. He knew he was ready to share this secret with his supportive, loving boyfriend.

“Is it a sex thing?” Remus asked, blunt as ever.

Logan gave a short laugh, unsurprised. “No, it’s not a ‘sex thing’. I just...”

Now he paused, his own fingers tracing the design on the bedspread as he worked up his courage.

Finally, without meeting Remus’ gaze, he muttered, “... I didn’t mind that.”

“Didn’t mind what?” Remus replied.

“What you were just doing.”

There was a slight pause before Remus responded, “The kissing? I don’t mind it either-”

“Not that!” Logan interjected, feeling a blush rise to his face. God, Remus was going to make him say it, wasn’t he?

“The- the... ugh.” He took a deep breath before just spitting it out. “The tickling.”

“What’s that?”

Logan looked at Remus, waiting for the punchline. None came.

“Excuse me?”

Remus quirked his head to the side. “What’s tickling?”

Logan opened his mouth to respond, then closed it. Opened it, then closed it again.

“There’s no possible way you don’t know what that word means.”

Remus shrugged. “Not my area of expertise, I guess,” he said, still watching Logan with a confused look on his face.

For some reason, Remus’ complete lack of understanding of what Logan was trying to say made his courage vanish quick as lightning. “It is unimportant. I apologize for bringing it up.”

He moved to lie back against his boyfriend’s chest, but what jostled rather roughly as the creative side sat up.

“No, no, wait a dang minute! You said you liked it, right? And I like to make you happy. So let’s do it!” He leaned over Logan, determination in his eyes.

Logan blinked at his surprising enthusiasm. “You would do that for me?”

Remus smiled again, shaking his head incredulously. “Why wouldn’t I? I love ya, Logan.”

He’d heard those words spoken so many times before, but Logan never tired of the butterflies he felt in his chest at Remus’ earnest adoration. “I love you, too.”

Remus’ eyes softened, before he rubbed his hands together with excitement. “Okay, well, just tell me what to do!”

Logan thought for a second. How do you teach someone how to... do this?

“... Give me a moment.”

He untangeled himself from their bedsheets, smirking a bit when his boyfriend whined at the loss of contact. He moved to the dresser, sorting through with slightly shaky hands before pulling out a pair of gym shorts. They were lightweight and slighty baggy; Logan quickly changed into them, out of the thick flannel pajama bottoms he was wearing. On a whim, he pulled off his t-shirt as well, turning to face Remus with his arms shyly crossed over his bare chest.

Remus wolf whistled. “Why are you stripping?”

“It’s... easier, and more fun, when there are less layers in the way.” Logan briefly thought of the fun that could be had with multiple layers, each one getting gradually removed as the tickles became more and more intense, but he shoved that scenario away for another time.

Remus titled his head, smiling in bemusement. “I still don’t even know what we’re doing.”

“It’s-” Logan gestured with his hands, sighing a little bit as he felt himself begin to blush. “I am sensitive to certain types of touch. That’s called being... ticklish. You are going to be stimulating my nerve endings in a way that provokes laughter.”

He laid on his back in the middle of the bed, Remus sitting criss cross applesauce next to him.

“You mean when I touch you, it’s tickling, and that makes you wanna laugh?”

“Not every touch,” Logan explained. “There are two kinds of t- tickling. Knismesis and gargalesis.”

“Wait, should I be taking notes on this shit?” Remus asked, only half-joking.

Logan gave a fond sigh. “Just give me your hand.”

Remus obediently held out his hand, and Logan grabbed his wrist, flipping it so his palm was facing down. He manuevered Remus’ hand above his stomach and gently lowered it so that Remus’ fingertips were barely tracing the skin.

“This is knismesis- meaning, uh, light tickling.” After a few seconds, Logan released his hand, allowing Remus to continue to drift his hand over his tummy, circling around with no rhyme or reason.

Remus frowned. “You’re not laughing. Am I doing it wrong?”

“Well, my stomach is not particularly receptive to knismesis- at least, initially, that is,” Logan said, switching into lecture mode. “After some exposure to the secondary method, gargalesis, I will most likely be more outwardly reactive to either method, due to-”

“Where should I tickle you, then?” Remus interrupted.

Logan bluescreened.

“Um. Um. Um. My sides.”

Remus moved his hand outwards, tracing the skin just as lightly as he had on Logan’s stomach. “Like this?”

Logan was going to respond, but he found himself exhaling in short, sharp breaths whenever he opened his mouth.

“Are you okay?” Again Remus’ tone was full of worry, so Logan quickly nodded.

“Yes,” he said, hissing the word a little when Remus’ fingers met the dip of his waistline.

“Does this hurt you?”

“No-” The word got strangled in Logan’s throat, and his lips stretched into a half smile, half grimace.

Remus chuckled a little at Logan’s bizzare outward reaction. “Your face just, like, went all screwy. Why?”

“It- it’s just an involuntary reaction my body does when I’m ti-ickled!” Logan’s voice cracked, his back arching in response a new sensation on his skin.

“What did I do?” Remus asked. Logan had to sneak a peek to where his fingers were tracing over his side: nothing had changed, except-

“Your fingernails,” Logan realized, eyes locked onto the way Remus’ fingers had curled slightly inward, causing his nails to drift over Logan’s skin as opposed to the pads of his fingers.

“They- they are- hmm, they add to the knismesis sensation.” He could barely get the words out through his huffs of almost-giggles, his torso attempting to squirm away from the tickles.

Remus stayed silent for a few beats before humming in understanding, and suddenly both hands were purposely spidering their nails along each of Logan’s sides. He let out a frankly embarrassing noise, jerking his upper body one way and another, but the way Remus’ was targeting both sides at once made it impossible to escape.

“Do they tickle more?” Remus asked, and something about the genuine  curiosity in his voice was making the sensations even more unbearable. “Logan? Lo, do the nails tickle more-”

“Yes yes yehehes!” Logan threw his head back onto the pillow, laughter quickly escalating as Remus experimented between spidering and scratching and skimming the skin.

“Wow, you’re laughing so hard, Lo. This is fun!”

“Stahahap-!”

Immediately Remus’ hands were off of him, allowing Logan the chance to breathe.

“Are we done already?”

Logan took the break to catch his breath. “No, I- I apologize, we should have discussed this before we started.”

He thought for a moment about how to phrase his next statement.

“I will occasionally say things that imply that I want you to stop, when in reality, I don’t.”

Remus tilted his head. “Why?”

“It’s another involuntary reaction to the sensations,” Logan replied. “My fight-or-flight reflexes are kicking in, causing my brain to attempt any and all ‘escape routes’, including asking for mercy or relief. However, part of the... appeal, for me, is feeling-”

He stammered slightly, feeling his face heat up as he forced himself to continue through gritted teeth.

“Feeling... helpless. So, when I say ‘no’ or ‘stop’, I don’t want you to stop.”

“Oh-kay,” Remus said hesitantly. “But how will I know when to actually stop?”

“I believe the implementation of the ‘traffic light’ system is the most efficient in this scenario,” Logan replied. ‘Yellow’ means I need a break, ‘red’ means stop completely. It’s a fairly common method of safewords for situations like this.”

Remus raised an eyebrow. “How much research have you done on tickling, teach?”

So much research, Logan thought. What came out sounded more like, “Hnng.”

He blushed even further at the snickers coming out of Remus’ mouth. “Your face is redder than a blood-soaked apple! What’s up with that?”

“Mhmm, I-” His voice cracked, God damn it.

Logan stared at the ceiling, doing everything in his power to keep his voice neutral as he continued, “I find talking about... this subject to be rather... embarrassing,” he ground out.

“Is that why you keep stuttering whenever you say the word ‘tickle’? And why you’ve been blushing like crazy this whole time? Because you’re embarrased?”

Damn it, damn it, damn it. Logan felt his face flush even further.

“... Yes.”

It was silent for a moment. Until Remus began to laugh.

Logan looked up at his Remus, who wasn’t even trying to hide his snickers as he looked down at his boyfriend.

“That’s the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever heard,” Remus said gleefully.

Logan pouted. “Shut up.”

“Oh, is that another one of those things you say, but you don’t actually want me to do?”

“Remus.”

“What? I’m just asking! Apparently I’ve got a lot to learn about this tickling shit. Lucky for me, I’ve got the perfect teacher.”

He leaned down to give Logan a quick peck on the mouth, whose petulant expression softened just a bit.

“Thank you.”

Remus looked back down at Logan’s torso with an expression that made the logical side more than a bit nervous.

“So, where to next with this kin-nemesis thing?”

“Knismesis,” Logan corrected.

“That’s what I said. Let’s see, we’ve done tummy and sides. Where else can I go?”

Logan actually pondered the question for a second. He didn’t want to push himself too far- nor did he want to give Remus complete knowledge of how to wreck him (at least, not yet).

“I believe right now I would prefer to limit this demonstration to my upper body only, but there are still several different areas that would be receptive to a lighter touch.”

“Like...?” Remus prompted.

Logan faltered. “My... hips...”

Remus raised one eyebrow at him, slowly lifting his hand through the air and hovering it right over Logan’s pantline. His eyes slid back to Logan’s face, who nodded at him to begin.

Logan’s entire body constricted the instant he felt Remus’ fingers touch down in that horrifically sensitive stretch of skin between his hipbones. His giggles fell out of his mouth before he could even try to stop them, and it took everything in his power to not curl up into a ball to protect himself.

It only got worse as Remus began tickling him with intention, using his nails to trace over the skin.

“I don’t get why this is so much more ticklish that your tummy? They’re right next to each other.”

Logan threw his head back and forth, unable to respond to Remus’ idle conversation.

“Mm, mhmm, R-Remus, nohoho-”

“Wow, you can’t even talk! You’re too giggly!”

Logan flushed. He opened his mouth to deliver assure his boyfriend that he was still perfectly capable of speech, thank you very much-

And of course, Remus’ chose that exact second to latch both hands to his hip bones and go to town, lightly clawing around each of the sensitive bones.

Logan squealed through his laughter, unable to stop himself from jerking his hips back and forth, desperately trying to escape from Remus’ torturous hands.

His boyfriend only laughed, easily following Logan’s movements as he refused to abandon this giggle goldmine.

“Stay still!” He warned playfully. “Or else I’m gonna have to tie you down!”

Logan was not resonsible for the noise that escaped from his throat at Remus’ tease. Images of Remus binding his hands above him, his legs tied to the bedframe, pulled taut and immobile as Remus continued his tickling lesson all over Logan’s restrained body, filled his head. Logan was sure his face looked like a tomato at this point.

Remus took in Logan’s reaction, his hands halting as his jaw dropped. “Wait, can we do that?”

Logan couldn’t even look at the shit-eating grin his boyfriend was giving him right now. “Not tonight, but... in the future, I- I wouldn’t be opposed.”

Remus continued to look at him with wide eyes. Logan couldn’t help but smile at the honestly joyful expression on his face as he looked back down at Logan’s body.

“I love tickling,” Remus whispered reverantly. Logan’s breath hitched. He’d been dreaming of this for so long, he couldn’t believe it was actually happening to him.

He cleared his throat, bringing both of them back to reality. “I believe I am ready to move onto the second method. Gargalesis.”

Remus nodded enthusiastically, scooting even closer to Logan’s body to have full reach over his torso.

“Where can I start?”

Logan flushed a little under Remus’ attentive gaze. His boyfriend’s unintentional teasing was almost as bad as if he were trying to tease him. It was infuriatingly endearing.

“My stomach,” he blurted out.

Remus nodded, placing his hands on Logan’s lower stomach. 

“How do I do this, Teach?”

Logan was having a little trouble speaking, because Remus’ hands were warm and his touch was soothing, but his fingers were curling inwards and his nails were barely grazing the skin and his thumbs were twitching and Logan was suddenly very, very aware of how much power he was giving his boyfriend, and how completely vulnerable he was making himself right now-

“Logan,” Remus said with a smile, and Logan was so worked up he almost didn’t notice the teasing tone of voice. Almost.

“If you don’t tell me exactly what to do,” Remus continued, “I can’t tickle you.”

He started rubbing his hands in circles around Logan’s stomach, and even though it didn’t really tickle, it did succeed in making Logan even more desperate than he already was.

“Just press into my stomach,” he exclaimed, his face burning. “Like- like this.”

Logan raised his hands, flexing his fingers to demonstrate.

Remus had barely taken a second to watch Logan’s hands before trying it for himself, prodding his fingers into the soft fat of Logan’s stomach.

Immediately Logan’s hands spasmed, jerking to drag Remus’ hands away from his sensitive stomach before Logan could get himself under control. He felt a rush of nervous giggles forcing their way out of his throat.

Remus’ fingers traveled all over his stomach, making sure to throughly inspect any particular spots that made Logan jump or squeak or otherwise imply it’s an especially ticklish spot. Remus cast a glance to him.

“Is this good, Lo?”

Logan could only nod, his laughter increasing both in pitch and volume as Remus’ fingers began prodding the pudge around his bellybutton. One hand clenched into a fist and began sporadically beating the mattress beside him, while the other flew to cover his mouth.

Remus narrowed his eyes. “Don’t hide your pretty little smile from me, Logan,” he warned, hands creeping closer and closer inwards. Logan realized he was shaking his head, which only seemed to spur Remus on.

“What, is this a bad spot?” he asked. “Your bellybutton’s too ticklish?”

“Nohohoho!” Logan squealed through his laughter, but Remus only laughed, his fingers spiraling ever closer.

“Are you green, Lo?” he asked. His tone was teasy, but he did keep his eyes on Logan’s face.

Logan tore his eyes away from Remus’ finger, now hovering over his bellybutton. He took a deep, steadying breath, and met Remus’ eyes.

“I’m green.”

As soon as the word was out of his mouth, Remus dug his finger into Logan’s navel. Logan gasped through his laughter, bucking his hips in a weak attempt to jostle Remus’ finger out, but the creative side just smirked and placed one hand on his hips, holding him in place.

“Remus!” Logan’s hands scrabbled against the sheets, looking for anything to hold onto so he wouldn’t try to push Remus away. His boyfriend only stayed in that spot for a few seconds before pulling away, swooping his hands up to latch onto Logan’s sides.

“Are you ticklish here, Lo?”

He squeezed once, his thumbs digging in below Logan’s ribs while his other fingers curled into the stretch of skin between Logan’s sides and his back.

Logan barely heard him over the sound of his own laughter, especially when Remus vibrated his hands against the spot, sending a new wave of wheezing giggles from his mouth. He abruptly realized that he was running low on breath, but as soon as he had this realization Remus’ hands were off of him.

“You need a break?” Remus asked. Logan nodded, hit with a wave of gratitude that Remus could tell what he needed before he even said anything.

“Just from that spot,” he replied. “You may continue ti- doing that somewhere else.”

Remus smirked at Logan’s stammer, but he did hold his hands over Logan’s torso again. “Where?”

“My ribs,” Logan said. It wasn’t his absolute worse spot, but it was up there; however, as Remus delicately ran his fingers down his ribcage it was almost relaxing.

Logan sighed, body arching slightly into Remus’ touch.

“You like it here?” Remus asked. Logan couldn’t tell if he was teasing again, or genuinely curious, but he nodded all the same.

Remus hummed in understanding. He shifted to get a better angle, but the movement caused his fingers to press slightly into Logan’s lower ribs. He jerked to the side, small giggles escaping from his mouth.

Remus tilted his head. “So both methods tickle you here?”

Logan paused for just a second, then nodded. “Well... the two methods impact me differently, but yes, they are both effective.”

“There’re so many options,” Remus murmured, almost to himself. Logan could practically see the gears turning in his head. It was endearing, but if Logan was honest, there was an infinitesimal feeling of fear in his chest, because Remus, by definition, could be very creative.

“Like, what would you do if I did this?”

Suddenly he was straddling Logan’s hips, eyeing him with extreme scrutiny. Logan’s jaw dropped, his cheeks flushing as he tried speak, but then Remus’ hands were on either side of his ribs, and whatever Logan was about to say died on his tongue.

“What if I tickle lightly over here...”

Remus’ fingers began spidering up the right side of Logan’s ribs, going almost to his underarms before spidering their way back down again. Logan’s giggles started anew, having recovered some of his energy from his break.

“... And hard over here?”

And then his other hand was clawing at the crevices between Logan’s left ribs, causing his laughter to intensify drastically. He immediately started leaning his torso as far from the touches as he could, but with Remus’ weight on his hips he couldn’t get very far.

“I can switch back and forth on each side,” Remus pondered aloud, “or I can go from really soft to really hard to really soft again...”

Something about the way he was narrating his process was making Logan feel even more flustered, and he whined through his laughter.

Remus trailed his nails down Logan’s ribcage, only to vibrate his thumbs into his lowest rib. Logan let out a couple snorts between his giggles, and Remus’ grin turned predatory.

“Oh, now that we’re definitely gonna have to investigate.” He repeated the motion, really making sure that he dug all around that sensitive bone.

“Rehehemus!”

His boyfriend chuckled, slowing his hands slightly.

“Yes, Logan?”

The two made intense eye contact.

Logan hesitated for just a moment before folding his arms behind his head.

“Try tracing down my forearms.”

Remus raised an eyebrow, but he did as Logan suggested. His fingers touched down on the skin below Logan’s elbow, and Logan fought to stay still as the gentle touch slowly trailed down his arms and closer to his pits.

Finally Remus reached his underarms, moving his fingers in small circles as he scratched his nails against Logan’s hollows.

“Does that tickle?”

Logan’s breath was coming out in faster and faster huffs.

“Y-yes, somewhat,” he managed.

Without warning, Remus abruptly dug a finger into the center of each of Logan’s pits, wiggling them deep into the muscle.

Logan would swear up and down that the noise he made was not a shriek, but Remus would say otherwise. Either way, it was obvious that Logan was caught completely off guard by the immediate elevation into rougher tickles.

His arms stayed up for about half a second before they came crashing down to his sides, which Logan instantly regretted, because now Remus’ hands were trapped in his pits and his fingers were still wiggling and fuck, dropping his arms shouldn’t have made it tickle so much worse but it does, it does, it does-

“Red! Red!”

Remus didn’t hesitate, yanking his arms back so quickly Logan briefly wondered if he’d hurt himself.

“Are you okay?” Remus asked immediately, practically crawling backwards on the bed to give Logan even more room.

Logan wrapped his arms as tightly around himself as he could. He curled inwards, body reflexively attempting to protect itself anyway it could. But he made sure to nod enough for Remus’ benefit.

“I am- I am fine,” he managed as he caught his breath. “Normally I would call ‘yellow’ before going straight to ‘red’, but that was- um.”

He cleared his throat, not meeting Remus’ gaze. “That was... much more intense than I had anticipated.”

Remus hesitantly crawled back towards him. He smirked. “You don’t have a lot of resistance built up against tickling, huh?”

Logan huffed. “That is not my fault. I don’t have any experience with it.”

Remus grabbed his hand, bringing up to his mouth and kissing his knuckles. “That’s gonna have to change,” he murmured, “because there’s no way in hell we’re not doing this again.”

Logan flushed yet again, but he didn’t have much energy to even pretend that he didn’t want that. Instead he merely nodded, pulling Remus by the hand as he fell backwards against the pillows.

“If you would be so inclined,” he muttered, “I believe cuddling would feel very pleasant right now.”

“Oh, hell yes!” Remus wasted no time in diving back under the covers, rearranging the two of them so Logan’s head could rest on Remus shoulder.

“Good?” he asked. Logan sighed contentedly, looking up at his partner’s soft smile.

“Exceedingly so,” he replied. He stifled a yawn, his eyes drooping shut.

“Thank you, Remus.”

He heard his boyfriend laugh lightly, and felt a small kiss against his temple. “Anything for you, Logan.”