#LIKE TRULY JUST FREE I WENT TO THE PHARMACY AND CAME OUT 15 MINUTES LATER WITH THE STUFF

[autisticaradiamegido]

day 16

so instead of a drawing todays art is Babys First Embroidery

it will eventually be a patch for my Cool Patch Jacket once i get the border all filled in

it is in reference to the fact that i recently found out my state has a program that provides free naloxone to anybody who wants to carry it, no prescription necessary.

if you aren’t familiar, naloxone (brand name Narcan) is a medication that can be used to reverse an opioid overdose almost instantaneously in an emergency. in my state it is provided in the form of a nasal spray, but similar programs in other areas might offer auto-injectors, or other subcutaneous delivery methods.

BUT what i want to get across is that there are A LOT of these programs out there! if you’re curious, just google “free naloxone [your location]” and you might be able to get your hands on free or extremely reduced cost doses of naloxone to carry with you. most programs will train you how to administer the medication, and how to recognize signs of overdose.

harm reduction for drug users is important to me, regardless of who is using them, or for what purpose. and you can be part of that effort in your community SO easily by adding this to your first aid repertoire. it’s a bit like getting cpr certified! only literally so fast and cheap and easy like in my case i was in and out of the pharmacy in 15 minutes!!! you can literally save somebodys life with this, it is so so worth it.

[15-dogs]

new hire |n.s.|

pairing: newt scamander x apothecary!reader

summary: you’re hired as the new apothecary at newt’s favorite establishment, and he finds himself attending the store more often to buy more and more ridiculous, unneeded items (all the fluff!! coffeeshop (technically apothecary) au, pining)

warnings: none

guide: (Y/N) = your name, italics = writing

word count: 3.9K

a/n: this is my take on a coffeeshop au!! i feel like newt would be more subject to visiting apothecaries than coffeeshops so i used all the basics of a coffeeshop au and changed it to an apothecary!! i hope you like it :)

Newt was positive that his Dittany was somewhere. He shook every drawer upside down, went upstairs to check his bedroom, back downstairs to turn every stone for the second time, then back upstairs to recheck his belongings before he admitted that he was out of it. 

He huffed, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet as he debated whether or not to pick up Dittany then. He ultimately decided that he didn’t want to risk getting into an accident where it was crucial to have on hand and come up empty so he threw on his vest and coat, making his way towards the apothecary store down the street. It was a small place disguised as a pharmacy on the outskirts of Diagon Alley. The building wouldn’t appear to muggles as it truly was, allowing for wizards to slip in and out unnoticed.

“Oliphant & Bailey’s Medicinal Supply” was painted onto a metal sign that swung outside the store, the metal sign bracket whining every time the wind would pass. Newt smiled at the familiar words before entering, being greeted with the smell of fresh herbs that were drying out on racks by the door. 

His eyes scanned the jars along the shelves, finding the Dittany hidden off to the side from everything else. He let out a content sigh as he attempted to snatch it off the shelf but it didn’t budge. Newt looked around the store with confusion and finally realized just how crowded the place was.

“Mr. Scamander!” a woman called out. Newt whipped around, finding Vancity Oliphant with a trail of boxes floating behind her, her dress robes pressed to perfection. “We haven’t seen you around here in quite some time. Where have you been?”

“Busy, mostly.” Newt shrugged, fiddling with his hands.

Vancity began to twist her wand, various potions flying onto the shelves. “Well, one thing’s for certain: we missed you. We’ve been getting an increase in business recently--” Vancity turned towards Newt, leaning in close “--the whole nonsense that that man, Lockhart, has spun has everyone panicked. He told them that if they don’t turn to holistic medicine, then there would be a greater chance that they would be attacked by a troll. Ridiculous, sure, but business has been outstanding! We even had to get a new hire!”

Newt gave her a placating nod, hoping that the conversation would be over soon. “Right, that’s fantastic-”

“Isn’t it?” Vancity rounded the counter and beckoned Newt to follow her, passing the people in the line who seemed to have been waiting for quite some time. “Anyway, how can I help you, Mr. Scamander?”

Newt nearly sighed with relief at the question finally being asked. “I tried to pick some Dittany up off the shelf, but it wouldn’t budge-”

“About that,” Vancity let out a low breath, dipping her head with disappointment. “With the uptick in sales, we’ve had an uptick in accidents. People were knocking our things off the shelves and it just took too much time to clean up and rebrew and whatnot. So we fixed everything down. Only employees can pick things off the shelf.” Vancity snatched a slip of paper, quill, and inkwell off the counter and slid them towards Newt. “We started to provide customers with these sheets so they can fill out what they need and we pick it up for them.”

Newt, knowing that the sooner it would all be over the better, simply nodded and began to fill out the form. Vancity chuckled before taking the form in her hands.

“One vial of Dittany coming right up, Mr. Scamander.” And just like that, she disappeared into the back room.

Newt glanced around the store and wondered if there was anything else he needed before he left. He spotted a few herbs off in the corner that might be of use but, as his gaze caught on the already irritated line, he decided it was in his best interest to pick them up another time.

“Mr.-...Sarmander?” a voice called out.

Newt whipped around, taken by surprise by the new face. Your face. He felt a strange sensation in his chest when he looked at you, like a sense of warmth had flooded through him. You raised an eyebrow at him, wondering why he had been staring at you for so long.

“Are you Mr. Sarmander?” you repeated, shaking the bottle of Dittany in your hand.

“Scamander,” he corrected as he approached you.

Your cheeks heated up at the mistake. “My apologies, Mr. Scamander. I just read what was off the paper but apparently I wasn’t looking closely enough.”

“I have truly terrible handwriting.” That was a lie. Newt didn’t know where it came from. “Thank you.”

“Have a lovely afternoon, Mr. Scamander!”

He would have one now.

•••

Newt was having some trouble making progress on his novel in the next few days. He had barely drafted a page of anything because he was too focused on the interaction that the two of you had only 4 days prior.

He knew you were kind. He could see it in your eyes. Even if he only spoke to you for just a moment, he knew it was true. And you had a lovely smile. One that was so lovely you must’ve flashed it at everyone and left them thinking about it as much as Newt was.

Newt shook his head, breaking himself from the trance he was in to look at his blank page. Writer’s block was not faring well with him. So he stood up and threw his jacket on, realizing he could do with the fresh air. As he was leaving his house, he stopped short in the doorway, snatching some money from his kitchen table. He might as well grab some more herbs while he was out.

No more than 15 minutes later Newt was entering Oliphant & Bailey’s. The store was empty for once, but he figured it would be for a Monday morning. Newt made his way to the counter, rocking back and forth as he awaited an attendant. To his dismay, Rita Bailey revealed herself from the back room.

“Mr. Scamander!” she cried. Rita leaned over the counter, furiously shaking his hands in hers. “How have you been?” Newt opened his mouth but she didn’t give him time to answer before she was speaking again. 

“I heard you were in here a few days ago. It’s not often that we see you in here twice a week. Are you out on something?” Rita’s eyes widened as she seemed to beat her own question in her head. She leaned unbearably close over the counter and whispered, “Is your Swooping Evil not producing? Because Vance and I have some products in the back. Stuff on the side, if you-”

Vancity, who stood in the doorway of the office, cleared her throat, calling the attention of her partner. Rita’s head whipped around, a sheepish grin plastered on her face.

“Rita,” began Vancity, her voice stern, “I need you in back to help with the budget.”

Rita stood to her full height, motioning towards Newt. “Well, who’s gonna help Scamander, then?”

Vancity leaned into her office, speaking to someone with a jerk of head towards the shop. There was a muffled reply and the sound of shoes clicking against hardwood, pacing around the back room.

Newt’s heart began to beat just a little faster. He didn’t want to get his hopes up for nothing. Then he caught himself. What was he getting his hopes up for? He wasn’t expecting anything, and he certainly didn’t care if you were there or not. It’s not like the back of his neck flushed and his cheeks started to heat up when he saw you exiting the back room.

“Mr. Scamander,” you stated. Newt let out a shaky breath; your voice was so smooth, the words sounded almost practiced as they fell from your lips. 

You brushed one hand off on the little apron that was tied around your waist and the other was used to magic a quill and inkwell onto the counter. You reached into your apron to pull out a slip of paper, dotting your quill into the ink. “How can I help you today?”

“I need some ingredients,” he shot out quickly, looking down at the counter.

You chuckled softly as you scribbled in a box, drawing his attention upwards. “What kinds of ingredients?”

Newt took in a sobering breath as you finally met his gaze. For a moment, he forgot what he came there for. “Mandrake root and Moonflower Pollen.”

You gave him a dutiful nod as you jotted the items down. You tossed the quill and paper up in the air, the quill finding its place by the inkwell and the paper rolling itself up and flying into a cupboard below your legs.

You scooted out from behind the desk, walking up past Newt towards the racks of herbs. You picked up the dried up roots of a Mandrake, holding it up at him. “This one okay, Mr. Scamander?”

“Perfect.”

You moved to another counter, freeing a small paring knife from your apron. “I have to ask you, Mr. Scamander,” you began as you chopped up the root, “you seem to be buying a lot of medicinal supplies. Are you a Healer?”

Newt chuckled under his breath, shaking his head. “No, I’m a Magizoologist.”

You halted in your motions, looking up at him. “Is that so?”

“Yes.” His response was no more than a single exhale, the words barely forming as he stared into your eyes. He finally peeled himself away from your gaze to continue. “With the creatures I work with, some healing skills are of great use.”

You hummed in response. “I can imagine.” Flicking your wand, a small mortar and pestle flew to your side. With the blade of your knife, you scooped the chopped up root into the bowl and began to grind it to a fine powder. “You know, I was always interested in Care of Magical Creatures back at Hogwarts. I was never all that good at it, though. Not like I was with Herbology.”

Newt’s eyes were trained on the root being cut up, too afraid that looking would cause him to meet your occasional glance up and make a fool of himself. “I’m actually writing a book on magical creatures at the moment.”

“Really?”

“If you’d ever like to study magical creatures again, I could give you a copy.” Newt’s heart began to flutter at the way your eyes lit up.

You stopped in your motions of preparing his Mandrake Root, meeting his gaze with a soft smile. “That would be wonderful.”

After packaging up the now-crushed root into a small, beat up tin and handing it to Newt, you paced around the counter with another tin in hand. You approached a glass jar full of yellow pollen in it, using the scoop inside to portion out a generous amount.

“How’s this, Mr. Scamander?” 

You tilted the tin towards him, Newt leaning in to examine the contents. Before he could answer, a quiet sneeze came from his coat. You pulled the container back, your brows furrowed as Newt became flushed. He hesitated to reach into his coat, turning to the side as he pulled Pickett, his Bowtruckle, out and scolding him just out of earshot.

“No, Pick, I didn’t forget about-...she didn’t know you were-...don’t blame this on her! She did nothing-”

“I’m sorry,” you interrupted. Newt froze, cocking his head to see you practically leaning over his shoulder. “I have to ask, is that a Bowtruckle?”

Newt exchanged a glance with Pickett before popping him into his pocket, Pickett’s head resting just outside of the heavy fabric to stare you down. “Yes, he is.” You fought a giggle as you leaned down to stare at Pickett in the eyes. “He has some-”

“Attachment issues?” you finished. Newt’s eyes went wide as he gave you a nod. A smile flickered onto his lips for just a moment. You looked up at Newt from your position then stood to your full height. “I’ve heard of that being the case with Bowtruckles before.”

Newt simply nodded again, too distracted by the fact that you were just inches from his face. For just a moment he could have sworn that he saw your eyes flicker down to his lips, his breath getting caught in his throat.

“I have just the thing for your Bowtruckle,” you whispered before moving away towards another shelf.

Newt shivered and let out a sigh, his chest thundering. Finally, he realized you had moved away and followed, watching with a close eye as you broke off the tiny fruit of a strange purple herb that he couldn’t place.

“What’s his name?” you asked while you pulled the fruit into halves.

“Pickett.”

You turned around, offering a half of the fruit to Pickett. Pickett perked up, looking up at Newt for permission. You chuckled at the interaction while Newt pulled Pickett out, letting him sit on his finger.

“Well then, this is for you, Pickett.”

Pickett shared one more look with Newt before taking the fruit and gnawing on it instantly. He let out a happy squeak and jumped onto your arm, crawling up to your shoulder as he continued to snack on the fruit.

Newt let out an impressed laugh at the sight. “Pick doesn’t quite like strangers,” he explained.

You turned your head to eye the happy Bowtruckle, petting him with the pad of your index finger. “Suppose we’re not strangers anymore, are we, Pick?”

“Newt,” Newt shot out quickly. He continued to stare at his fingers while he toyed with them. “You can call me Newt.”

Newt only looked up when he saw your hand come into his field of vision, all delicate and strong. He took your extended hand and shook with careful vigor, the corner of his lips quirking upwards.

“Then consider us friends, too, Newt. I’m (Y/N).”

•••

Newt began to frequent the apothecary more often than he needed to. He always seemed to be running out of something, and he always seemed to arrive just when the rush died down. His list of items he needed appeared to grow longer and longer with each visit, but you never once gave his service to another employee.

The thought of you ran tirelessly through Newt’s head at night. His heart would beat just the slightest bit faster when he thought of that gorgeous smile you would flash him when he walked through the door, almost like you were expecting him to be there. 

Oh, Merlin, and that disarming chuckle that tumbled from your lips when he would trip over his words. It instantly calmed Newt down, his stammer fading away slowly.

Distracted from his writing again, Newt decided to pay you a visit at the apothecary. He snatched the coat of the back of his chair and ran out the door, his heart getting lighter with each step towards the store. Once he arrived, he swung the door open and looked up, only to find that you weren’t there. He frowned, but approached the counter and waited.

“Mr. Scamander!” Vancity cried as she exited the backroom. “How can I help you?”

Newt leaned over slightly, checking to see if you were in the back before the door shut behind Vancity. “Is (Y/N) here?”

Vancity let out an apologetic sigh. “Sorry, Mr. Scamander, she’s out sick.” Newt opened his mouth to speak but Vancity predicted his next question, silencing him immediately. “She doesn’t know when she’ll be back, either.”

“Oh. Right.” Newt focused on the counter, trying not to meet that horribly embarrassing sympathetic look that crowded Vancity’s face. “Will she be okay?”

“She’ll be perfectly fine. Nothing she can’t handle. It is her job to supply medicinal supplements, after all. Now, is there anything I can help you with?”

“No, actually.”

Newt wasn’t sure what Vancity said left-- his mind was too full with strange thoughts about the nature of your relationship. You were friends, weren’t you? That’s what you said to him the day you met Pickett. So if you were just friends, why was he feeling so lost without you there?

Newt took his time walking back to his house, his mind off someone else. He couldn’t help but recall the way you made him feel with your kind heart and witty humor, your soft eyes and enchanting smile. Just remembering that made his cheeks heat up.

As Newt entered his home, he walked into the basement and opened a cupboard to prepare the food for his Glow Bugs when a few tins from Oliphant & Bailey’s fell onto the counter. That’s when it hit him. He didn’t need all those herbs. He never did. So why was he going?

It was so plain. It was all there, the facts laid out in front of him: Newt Scamander had feelings for you. It was so incredibly obvious that he wondered how he didn’t notice it before. And it wasn’t a normal attraction, it was a stupid schoolboy crush; the kind where he’d go through ridiculous measures just to get your attention.

He groaned and threw his head into his hands at his epiphany. What in Merlin’s name was he supposed to do?

•••

Newt revisited the apothecary day after day, awaiting your return. After about a week of the constant rejections, he decided to let it go for the time being. It was frustrating, to say the least, to not hear how you were doing. He was more concerned about you than he was about acting on his feelings, because Merlin knows when he’d do that.

As Newt ran through the possibilities of what you had come down with, a knocking came from his front that snapped his attention to the forefront of his mind. He opened the door and stared, slightly confused at the sight before him.

“Theseus?”

“Nice to see you, too, Newt,” Theseus scoffed, embracing his younger brother into a tight hug. Newt stood quite stiff in his arms until he let go.

The younger Scamander rested an arm against the doorframe, leaning against it to make himself look much taller next to his brother who just happened to tower over him. After settling into the awkward position, Newt asked, “What brings you here?”

Theseus reached into his pocket to pull out a small notice, placing it into the hands of Newt. Newt frowned before unravelling it and scanning over its contents.

“It’s a notice from the Ministry. Next date to get your international ban removed.”

“Ah.” Newt raised the note in the air, casting a silent spell to have the paper zip itself down to his basement. “I’ll see you then, I reckon.”

Newt tried to shut the door but Theseus put his foot in it, prying it open to face Newt once more. Theseus held out a hand as the other fished through his jacket pocket to pull out a few small vials of Dittany.

“Just in case,” Theseus added sheepishly. “You always used to run out of this, and I can bet you still do.”

Newt flashed a grateful smile at his brother before his eyes caught on the label of the bottle. That same label that was plastered on every herb in his basement.

“Did you get this from Oliphant & Bailey’s?”

“I did, actually.” Theseus snorted, an amused grin on his lips. “The Apothecary there, the new one, she knew you. Recognized my face and asked if I was related to you, ‘the more handsome Scamander’. Her words, not mine.”

“When did you get these?”

“Right before I came here, why?” That familiar devious smirk grew on Theseus’ lips. “Do you fancy the girl, Newt?”

Newt lit up instantly, regardless of Theseus’s teasing. He sucked in a sharp breath and turned towards his coat rack to grab his jacket, slipping it on with great haste. Newt pushed his brother aside, casting a spell to activate the wards at his house.

Newt practically ran to the apothecary, the door swinging open to find a mass of people in line. He didn’t care. He pushed to the front, resting when he got to the counter. He scanned the store, trying to find you but came up empty.

“Newt?”

The sandy haired man whipped around, finding you walking out of the backroom, boxes in hand. Newt sighed, a warmth spreading inside of him at the sight of you. He ran up to you and alleviated the weight from your hands, resting the box on the counter.

“How are you feeling?” he asked through labored breaths.

“I’m...fine. Were you just running?”

Newt was never a good liar. He always got caught one way or another. “Yes…? I desperately need some Dittany.”

A knowing smile toyed at your lips as you raised your brows at him. “Dittany? Did your brother not give you the two vials like he said he would?”

Newt Scamander: expert in magical creatures, failure in lying.

“...right. I meant that I need some of that fruit you gave Pickett a few weeks ago.”

You snorted with laughter before pulling out the form and filling it out with the items, name, and his home address. You cut through the throng of people, snatching a tin up and preparing some of the fruit for Newt.

He began to rifle through his jacket pockets in an attempt to find some money for the treats he didn’t really need.

“How much is it-”

“It’s on the house, Newt. I’m pretty sure you’re our best customer, anyway.”

Newt looked up at you for a moment, his lips curling upwards at your kindness. “I appreciate it.”

“Don’t mention it. You know,” you began as you labeled the tin, “being sick wasn’t all that bad. Kept me away from work and all. Let me take a break.” 

Newt nodded, feeling selfish for wishing you to be at work all the time just so he could see you. “Right,” was all he managed to say.

“The worst part”--you shoved the tin into Newt’s arms-- “was not seeing you.”

The tips of Newt’s ears began to heat up. He wanted to say something clever so desperately but all he managed to do was stare at you in complete shock, eyes wide and jaw slack. 

He watched as your eyes flickered down towards the tin, seemingly awaiting a reaction. Newt furrowed his brow before glancing down at the writing on there, blinking in shock. He reread it a few more times, only looking up when he heard you chuckle.

“Is this serious?” he asked.

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Because it’s-- well it’s-- it’s me, and you’re you. You’re just...you’re you and I’m me, and I just didn’t think that you’d feel that way-”

“Newt,” you cut off, laughter spilling from your lips, “I happen to like you being you. Funny how those things work.”

Newt couldn’t process what you had just said. It was like everything in the world had tipped in his favor all at once. Just that gorgeous, encapsulating smile on your face was proof enough for him.

“Reckon I’ll see you tomorrow night, then,” he finally managed to say, backing up the best he could towards the door.

“Tomorrow night,” confirmed. Newt was nearly at the door when you called out, “It’s a date!”

He slipped outside, getting a breath of fresh air for the first time in 15 minutes. He ran a hand through his hair, just then realizing that his heart was pounding out of his chest, his grin so wide that his cheeks began to ache. But he didn’t care. He couldn’t be bothered to. Newt looked down at the label one last time, chuckling at the note.

Thursday. 7 PM. Your place.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

general taglist: @pandaxnienke @lunalovecroft @for-bebbanburg

[chocoluckchipz]

Dance with Me, Chaton - 15

Read it on A03, WattPad, FF.net

Written for @ladynoirjuly2019

< Previous

15. Animal Tendencies.

Adrien was going to kill Plagg for forgetting to mention that his wonderful medicinal tea had a severe side effect. He woke up just before sunrise. His skin slightly prickled. A couple of hours later his whole body was on fire, burning, itching for a touch, and no matter what Adrien did, nothing helped. Showers and baths relieved pain for a maximum of ten minutes. An anti-itch ointment lasted half an hour at most. His own desperate scratching only made the situation worse.

He needed someone else to touch him. Someone other than him to run their fingers on his skin, get them in his hair, to caress his itch away. Adrien didn’t know how he knew that, but his mind kept wishing for Ladybug to be here and save him from the agony.

Adrien: What the hell, Plagg? What was in that tea?

Plagg: Some ancient Chinese crap. Why?

Adrien: I itch all over, and it won’t stop.

Plagg: Never happened to me, and I drink that stuff all the time.

Adrien: What do I do to stop it?

Plagg: How should I know? I told you, it never happened to me.

Adrien: What was inside that tea exactly? Maybe I can Google the remedy or ask at the pharmacy.

Plagg: Ugh. Kid. You’re making me work. :unamused: Give me a few.

Adrien: You got me into this in the first place, so don’t complain.

Plagg: Hey! Don’t point your finger at me. Do you still have a cold?

Adrien paused and thought. With the itching problem, he hadn't paid attention if he was still sick. But, no. The headache was gone. So were the stuffy nose and a slight cough he'd developed just before bedtime. Weird. Apart from the driving-him-crazy itch, he was healthy.

Adrien: No. The cold is gone.

Plagg: There. See? I helped you. Your body’s reaction to my help isn’t my liability.

A few minutes later he added.

Plagg: My doctor said it’s a rare side effect. It’ll pass in up to twenty-four hours by itself. You’re welcome.

Adrien: What am I supposed to do until then? It itches all over.

Plagg: Find someone to scratch the itch. :grin:

Adrien: I really hate you. I hope you know that.

Plagg: Good. I’m glad we’re honest. I’ll see you at eight.

Adrien: You said you were busy today.

Plagg: And so, I am. But I'll be free at eight and you don't have a cold anymore, so see you at eight. Now I must depart. My business is waiting, and it’s delicious. ;)

Adrien groaned and put his phone away, dropping his head into his hands. Why did he think the treacherous glutton would help him? He was probably snickering right now, imagining the hell Adrien's been ever since this morning. Though it did get a little better as of now, so perhaps, Plagg didn't lie and this itch would pass with time. It better, because if it wouldn't, Adrien was going to hunt that devil down, tie him to a chair, and slowly eat all of his stinky cheese in front of him. He'd even pretend to enjoy it because Adrien suspected that was the only thing that could truly hurt Plagg.

He glanced at the clock, an idea popping into his mind. This was crazy, but maybe he should go to work? He’d be a little late, but it’d be a great distraction and would make this itch easier to get through. Adrien had class, after all, and would never scratch himself at a public place, and everyone knew that if you don't scratch an itch, it'd go away faster. Adrien nervously chuckled. He was insane. He knew it. But this insanity was on a genius level. He had to admit it.

He regretted his decision only an hour in. The itch didn’t stop. It didn’t get any better. In fact, it got worse, but now, being in public, Adrien could neither take a shower, not apply ointment, nor scratch himself. And on top of everything, his urge to ask for someone’s help skyrocketed. He only hoped no one would enter the office he was hiding in because he wasn’t sure he wouldn’t be begging on his knees for help.

Gathering his last strength, Adrien stood up. Coffee. He needed some coffee and go home. He couldn’t take it anymore. This was a mistake.

He was quickly walking down the hallway towards the break room when Kagami caught up with him.

“So, are you up for that lunch, Adrien?” she asked. “I see you’re feeling better today.”

He nervously chuckled, quickening his steps. “I’m sorry, Kagami, but not today. I thought I was well enough for the work, but I might have overestimated my strength.”

“Alright.” She smiled at him. “Then we reschedule for later. Let me know when you’re up for it.”

"Sure," Adrien said, stopping at the elevator and pressing that button repeatedly. Get here already! He needed coffee.  

Kagami raised an eyebrow. "Maybe you should see a doctor. It could be more serious than a cold."

Damn Plagg!

His eyes locking on Kagami, Adrien paused. What he really needed was not a cup of coffee or a doctor. He needed… maybe… should he ask Kagami for help?

“Are you alright?” she tilted her head to a side, frowning.

Adrien pushed the thought aside. No way. Even from what little he knew of her, Kagami would think him crazy if he were to ask her for that kind of help.

“I’ll be fine once I get coffee and go home.” He smiled politely and bit his farewell as the elevator had finally arrived.

When Adrien practically ran in the break room, he found another person he knew there.

“Hello, M Agreste.” Marinette smiled at him. “How are you today? Feeling better?”

His breathing quickening, Adrien stared at her wide-eyed. Marinette!

She frowned in concern at his lack of an answer. “Adrien? What’s wrong? You don’t look so well.”

Adrien’s throat went dry, his heart pounding. Marinette would understand. She came to work rocking pigtails and jean shorts overall the other day. She was just as silly as him. And compassionate. And kind. She would understand and help him.

“You’re scaring me, Adrien.” She came closer, gently touching his shoulder. “At least say something.”

Adrien almost purred from the pleasure her touch had brought him. He was right! He needed someone else to do it for him… but… there was still something… Losing all shame, Adrien took her hand and put it on his head, closing his eyes in bliss.

Right there. Yes! That was good. That was perfect.

Marinette blinked but didn’t take her hand away. Instead, she ran her fingers through his hair. “It’s so soft.”

Her hand slipped to his jaw, as she brought the other one up to cradle his face and tilt him to look at her. “What’s wrong, Adrien?”

He opened his eyes in annoyance. His hair. He needed her fingers in his hair. It was weird and irrational and, gosh, he hoped she wouldn’t run away but…

“Are we friends, Marinette?”

She nodded. “Yes, I’d say we are friends.”

“Are we good friends?”

“I think so.”

“Can you do me huge but weird favour then? For a good friend.”

“Sure.” She smiled. “What can I do for you?”

“Can you…” Adrien inhaled and mumbled as fast as he could, “Can you pet me?”

Her eyes widened as she slightly leaned away. “You—you want me to—pet you?”

Adrien nodded, his gaze glued to the floor. He was already in deep. There was no reason not to jump in further. “Please? I know it sounds strange and weird and inappropriate, but as you know I had a cold yesterday, and my butt camp instructor gave me some tea and said it’ll cure my cold in no time, so I took it, and it did because obviously I don't have a cold anymore, but I started to itch all over, so I called him, and he said it’s a rare side effect and it’ll pass with time, but it’s driving me nuts.” He paused, inhaled, and finally raising his eyes to look at Marinette, added. “It’s so bad, Mari. I can’t soothe it myself, but when you touched me it felt like heaven, so I thought maybe you wouldn’t mind…” Seeing Marinette’s perplexed expression, he sighed and turned away to leave. “Never mind. I must be going crazy. I’ll just go home. Please, forget I said anything.”

His face was on fire as Adrien marched out of the room. What was he thinking? Marinette was a nice girl, and she’d understand a lot of things, but this? He’d think himself insane as well. She’d probably avoid him now like a wildfire—

“Adrien?”

He jerked around.

Her cheeks glowed crimson red as she looked to the side. “I can… help you. If you want, I mean… it’s a medical emergency… of a kind, right? And my break just started, so I have time to… help?”

His chest rising and falling rapidly, Adrien feverishly nodded. Who needed shame or decency? He couldn’t take it much longer.

She hid her hands behind herself, biting her lip. “Do you want… where do you want me to… help you? Somewhere private… maybe?”

Still speechless that she’d agreed, Adrien nodded. He knew a place. His father had a lounge for meeting guests. There was a couch. No one went there, ever. Saying nothing, he grabbed her hand and headed that way. It took them only a few minutes. He motioned to the couch.

“You can sit there. Do you mind if I lay my head in your lap?”

She squeaked Sure and sat down on a couch. Adrien lay down, his head on her lap as he looked at the door. “I’m so sorry, Marinette.”

“That’s okay,” she said, her voice gentle. “I understand.”

She let her fingers brush his hair. He exhaled a relieved sigh. Once she covered all of it with gentle touches, she dug in deeper, lightly scraping his scalp. Adrien couldn't hold in the delightful moan.

“Is—is this okay?”

“Yes, please,” he purred, his eyes closed, a satisfied grin on his lips.

“Okay,” she whispered, continuing her ministrations. She stroked and scratched, evoking sounds from Adrien he wasn't aware he was capable of. His favourite spot was just at the base of his neck. When Marinette reached out and ran her hand over his back, he flipped to his tummy and shuffled closer, leaning into her touch.

Marinette giggled. “You’re just like a cat.”

“It’s embarrassing,” Adrien mumbled. “But it feels so nice.”

“Does it help?”

“Immensely. I feel amazing for the first time since I woke up today.”

“Should we stop then if you’re feeling fine?”

“No.” Adrien pressed closer. “Not yet. A few more minutes. Please.”

“My lunch break will be over in five.”

“Just five?”

Marinette laughed. “Unfortunately.”

“Fine,” he sighed. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she chuckled.

Adrien closed his eyes to enjoy the last few moments in heaven he was promised to their fullest potential.

“How do you feel?” Marinette asked, once her break was over.

“Still itchy, but much, much better,” Adrien replied. “I’ll probably go home now and see if a cold shower will help relieve the rest.”

“You might want to pick up an anti-itch remedy in your way to carry you over until it passes.”

“I have one,” Adrien said, standing up. “I’m so sorry, Marinette. This is beyond embarrassing, but I couldn’t handle it anymore, and I knew you wouldn’t judge me.”

She smiled at him, her cheeks rosy. “No worries. I was glad I could help.”

“Thank you,” Adrien replied, taking her hand and placing a gentle kiss on her knuckles. “I promise I’ll make it up to you one day. Whatever you want.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” She laughed. “I have to go now, but I’ll see you around.”

“See you,” Adrien said, opening the door for her.

By the time he got home, the itch had subdued substantially, and a warm bath and lotion made it an ancient history. Flopping on his bed head first, Adrien groaned. How was he supposed to face Marinette tomorrow? She was nice enough to say nothing and even help, but he was sure their friendship was ruined beyond repair. He was going to kill Plagg. Ladybug… Ladybug would never find out about this.

***

Chat Noir: Good evening, my Lady. I hope you’re well and resting this lovely evening.

Ladybug: I will be in an hour or so. Finishing some work I took home.

Chat Noir: Didn’t have enough time to finish at work?

Ladybug: Nope. I found a stray kitten and spent a little bit more time with him than I could afford.

Chat Noir: A kitten?

Ladybug: The most handsome kitten, yes.

Chat Noir: My lady. I thought you were a grown woman and could prioritize work over play.

Ladybug: It’s easy for you to say, but if you saw him, you’d never walk away. He was in pain, Chat. Almost crying. I couldn’t just leave him out there to suffer. And it’s not like I had to do much for him to feel better. Just a few scratches and pats.

Chat Noir: And now you’re working at home because of it?

Ladybug: It was all worth it.

Chat Noir: You’re too kind for this world, my Lady. I hope you know it.

Ladybug: LOL Thank you. How was your day, Chat?

She. Would. Never. Know.

Chat Noir: Perfect. Spent lunch with the second-best person in this company.

Ladybug: Second? Who’s the best one?

Chat Noir: Of course, you, my Lady.

Ladybug: Flatterer. You haven’t even meet me yet.

Chat Noir: I did, and it was the best moment of my life.

Ladybug: Oh, so now we’re flirting?

Chat Noir: Idk, are we?

Ladybug:  ☺️

Chat Noir: That dance you did was fantastic. I’m really looking forward to that party now.

Ladybug: Speaking of that. Why don’t we make it a little bit more fun?

Chat Noir: I’m all ears, my Lady.

_______________________________________________________________________

Next >

[pharmacyfollies]

It’s Only March, I Already Need a Vacation: Pharmacy Follies

-Fucktard: "My doctor was supposed to send over a prescription for Folic Acid for my dad."

Me: "We haven't received anything yet. If you just came from there, it can take a little while for us to receive it."

Fucktard: "OMG, he really needs it."

Me: "I'm looking in his profile and see he has a refill for it. I can fill it."

Fucktard: "Yes, fill it. He really needs it."

Me: "Ok, we'll have it ready at 2:15."

Fucktard: "You mean, you can't give it to me now?"

Me: "No, we have to fill it and we're rather busy today."

Fucktard: "But it's only for Folic Acid."

Me: "Yes, that's exactly why it's put in to be picked up later. Folic Acid isn't considered important like antibiotics or pain medication for someone who just got out of the ER."

Fucktard: "He really needs to take this! It's really important!"

Me: "He hasn't taken this since August and it's not considered an emergency life dependency medication."

Fucktard: "You know, I work at ********. If a patient wants a medication right away, we give it to them right away!"

Me: "You want to have it transferred to your pharmacy so he can get it right away?"

The look on her face was truly a Kodak moment.

Me: "So do you want me to transfer it out or do you want to get it at 2:15? I have other people to take care of."

Fucktard: "Just fill it! I'll be back later!"

Yeah, that's what I thought.

-Asshole: "I'm here to pick up my medication."

Me: "Ok, Medicaid didn't cover this. They consider it an OTC item. If you want to get it, it's $84."

Asshole: "What do you mean, they don't cover it?"

Me: "What part did I lose you at?"

Asshole: "How can it not be covered? I really need this!"

Me: "Hydroquinone is a skin lightener. It's not a medical necessity. That's why they don't cover it."

Asshole: "But I really need it!"

Me: "You can buy it, however, it costs $84."

Asshole: "I'm not paying for that! I don't have that kind of money! That's why I have Public Aid!"

And while she's running her cock holster, I"m looking at her ride up and down.

Asshole: "What?"

Me: "I'm just checking out that sweet Infiniti SUV you're driving. Oh, so what were you saving that you don't have that kind of money to pay for a skin lightener?"

She had a confused look.

Me: "Look, Medicaid doesn't cover this. If you want it, it's $84. If not, I have other cars behind you. What will it be?"

Asshole: "I'm going to call my doctor to have him change it to something that is covered."

Me: "You do that."

I need a vacation from this joint.

-It happened. I knew it would. I finally snapped at someone for showing me their expired insurance card. I truly can't take this level of fuckery any more.

Wank Pot: "I'm here to pick up my prescription."

Me: "Do you have a new insurance card?"

WP: "Yes."

Me: "I need to see it."

She hands me the old insurance card.

Me: "I need the NEW insurance card."

WP: "I haven't received it yet but you can use this one."

Me: "No, I can't because it's expired."

WP: "But I haven't received my new one yet."

Me: "So let me get this straight. You know you have new insurance starting on January 1st. You haven't received a new card. It's almost MARCH. Why haven't you called the insurance to get a new card or at least get the billing information?"

WP: "I didn't know I'm supposed to get that myself."

Me: "Well, who do you think is supposed to get that for you?! This is YOUR insurance. This is YOUR responsibility. I don't understand why it's going on 3 months and you have NOT gotten this corrected. What are you waiting for?!! Right now, your medication is over $500. I suggest you get on the phone and make a phone call to get the billing information unless you want to pay cash price!"

WP: "Who am I supposed to call?"

Me: "Whoever your new insurance company is."

WP: "I don't know who that is."

Me: "I can't help you. You need to find out that information and when you get it, come back and we'll update everything."

I had to walk away. I feel kinda bad that I snapped but for fuck's sake!! I deal with this shit ALL FUCKING DAY!! Am I the only person, if I discovered that I have NOT received a new insurance card by January 1st, that calls the insurance company or goes online to their website to get the billing information ASAP so it have it ready when I seek medical attention? What in the fuck are these ding dong's waiting for? Next year for that new card to come in?!! Jesus molested in a manger!!!

-This is EXACTLY how I be looking and walking when I start my shift. Pissed off and extremely hesitant about the fuckery I'm about to be involved in, LMAO!!!

-Just when I thought I experienced it all, this level of fuckery occurred....

Me: "Can I help you?"

Asshole: "I left my prescription at home so can you call my doctor to get it for me?"

Me: "Left it at home as in you're from out of town and you forgot it?"

Asshole: "No, I went to the doctor today. I went home and I forgot to bring my prescription with me. I don't feel like going back home so can you call the doctor to get it?"

Me: "Was it a new prescription or a refill for something you've had?"

Asshole: "It's an antibiotic. It was new."

Me: "Ok, I'll let the pharmacist know and when she gets a chance, she'll give the doctor a call."

Asshole: "How long is that going to take?"

Me: "Well, she's taking care of some other issues so she'll add it to her list."

Asshole: "Can you ask her how long it's going to be?"

Me: "She's on the phone right now so I'm not going to interrupt her until she's done with that conversation."

Asshole: "I'm asking because I have other things to do."

Me: "If you want, you can come back later. I'm sure we'll have the prescription by then."

Asshole: "I'd rather get the prescription before I do my running around."

Me: "As soon as she's off the phone, I'll let her know what's going on so she can call your doctor as soon as she can."

Asshole: "Can't you call?"

Me: "No. Only the pharmacist can take in a new prescription."

Asshole: "Can't you ask her how long it's going to be?"

Me: "You see that woman standing there with a phone next to her ear? That's the pharmacist. As you can see, she's engaged in a conversation. I am not going to interrupt her while she's taking care of someone else. As soon as she's off the phone, I will relay the message."

Asshole: "Since you won't call the doctor, I'll call myself!"

She steps away to make her phone call and I start taking care of the other patient's in line. As I'm taking care of someone else, she comes to the counter and says....

Asshole: "My doctor's office is on the phone!"

Me: "I'm taking care of someone else right now, it's going to be a moment."

Asshole: "How long is that going to take?!"

At that point, I put her on ignore. I'm not entertaining that level of bullshit. I'm taking care of my patient and she makes the grave mistake of saying....

Asshole: "Did you hear what I said?"

Me: "Yes, I heard what you said and I answered you. Do you need me to repeat it? I'll use smaller words if necessary. Due to patient privacy, I need you to step away from the counter."

Asshole: "My doctor's office is on the phone!"

Patient: "You can go and help her because it's obvious there's something mentally wrong with her!"

I damn near died when my patient said that but here's where the fun begins...

Me: "Put your phone on speaker."

Asshole: "You can talk on my phone."

Me: "I'm not handling your phone. You either put it on speaker phone or I'm not helping you at all."

After huffing and puffing, she puts it on speaker....

Me: "Can I help you?"

Nurse: "Yes, what's the issue with her prescription? She says you won't fill it."

Me: "The issue is we can't fill her prescription because she left her prescription at home."

Nurse: "Oh. So why doesn't she go home and get it?"

Me: "That's a good question. Why don't you ask her that? You're on speaker phone. She can hear you."

Nurse: "We gave you a prescription to bring to the pharmacy. Why are you calling us?"

Asshole: "I left it at home and don't want to drive back home to get it. Can't you just call it in?"

Nurse: "The whole point of giving you a prescription was so you can take it to the pharmacy. Whatever. As soon as the doctor is done taking care of his patients, I'll speak to him and see if he'll call it in."

Asshole: "How long as that going to take?"

Nurse: "It's probably going to be a while."

Asshole: "Can't you just ask him to call it in now?"

Nurse: "No. He's in with a patient. If you can't wait then I suggest you go home and get your prescription."

Asshole: "I don't have time to do that!"

Nurse: "And I don't have time to deal with you right now. You have a good day."

And that's when she hung up the phone.

Asshole: "I can't believe this! This is ridiculous! You all are USELESS!!!"

And she stormed off. Me and my patient are just looking at each other trying to wrap our minds around that shit. WTF is wrong with these idiots?! OMFG. I'm fucking done for. I can't no more. God help me.

-As a mother, I know it can be distressing when your child is sick. However, when you come rolling up to the pharmacy acting like your kid is the Golden Child and you're seeking the Sacred Crossdagger of Ajanti, it's going to go down like this....

Me: "Can I help you?"

Idiot: "I'm here to pick up a prescription for my son."

Me: "Ok, it looks like the doctor just sent it over. If you'd like to wait, it will be 20 to 30 minutes."

Idiot: "This is an emergency! He's really sick!"

Me: "Considering it's for Amoxicillin, I know he's sick. However, if it were a real emergency, your doctor would've sent you to the ER instead of the pharmacy. Because I have other patients ahead of you, who also wanted to wait, the wait time is 20 to 30 minutes."

Idiot: "Can't it be done sooner?"

Me: "If it could be done sooner, I would've told you a shorter wait time."

Idiot: "But it's for a child!"

Me: "You see all those little people in the waiting area? They're children too. They're also sick and waiting on prescriptions. If you'd like, feel free to plead your case to their parents. If they agree that your child is more important than their own, I will push your child's medication to the front. Otherwise, it's 20 to 30 minutes."

And $1000 says she waited longer than that to see the Dr. For those who work in Dr's offices, do you also deal with this bullshit? How does that play out? Inquiring minds want to know.