#Kirkwall Noir

[athenasdragon]

In thinking about how the Dragon Age games have changed since Origins, I’ve been thinking about genre conventions and the inspirations for the series.

Dragon Age: Origins is very very heavily lifted from Dungeons & Dragons, and my impression is that this is because Baldur’s Gate was a big inspiration. I think it’s especially obvious when you open up your character profile. Like that is straight up a d&d character sheet. You can map the d&d classes onto the DA:O subclasses too (e.g. some of the warrior subclasses are champion [classic fighter], templar [paladin], and berserker [barbarian]). The heavy focus on tactics and the top-down combat option also evoke TTRPGs to me.

And of course, because we’re existing in the genre tradition here, we have a lot drawn from the Lord of the Rings as well. Darkspawn/Orcs are an unambiguously evil species that exists just to cause destruction! Humans are the predominant species, but we have nature-connected elves and subterranean dwarves! Our story takes place in among the ruins of a past civilization that existed in a distant age! We’ve got themes of history and faith and a little fellowship going on a journey to defeat an evil dragon.

So with that in mind, we have a pretty straight up and down medieval-inspired dark fantasy. It follows so closely in this tradition that we even see the writers struggling to break out of molds that they explicitly set out to avoid—for example, certain gender politics.

I really think the character who starts to break that is Varric. Not only is he a well-known author (requires not just widespread printing but widespread literacy and reading for fun—now we’re talking much more recent history in our world) but he’s writing (Kirkwall-flavored) hard-boiled detective fiction, which is explicitly an American* post-WWI tradition. This is a genre that explores the gritty reality of life in cities, interpersonal and systemic violence, and often positions a lone morally grey hero in small-scale opposition to those larger forces. Kirkwall (and DA2) isn’t a bad place to add that flavor.

Inquisition starts to feel more 20th century to me as well. We’ve got international espionage and geopolitics. We’ve got anxieties of a dramatic apocalypse brought about by man’s hubris. We’ve got, effectively, some variety of civil rights movement for both elves and mages.

What really got me thinking about this is that Neve and Lucanis feel like they’re some the same genre to me: the jaded, brilliant, but somewhat poorly-upkept big city detective and the heir-apparent of a powerful mafia family caught up by a betrayal both feel very interwar noir imo. Emmrich’s look is also SO 1930s. I can only speak for myself but I think that’s where a lot of the change in “vibe” can be traced.

It feels to me like Varric’s narration of the series has tugged the story itself into the genre he exists in.

Anyway, whether you wish the series stayed more straight up and down sword and sorcery or like the direction it chose to establish itself, I think it’s interesting to think about!

* I might ramble about how deeply North American the geography of Thedas is another time lol

[himluv]

DA Review Series: Hard in Hightown

<<< Previous Review: DA2 Character Stories

It's been a minute, but I'm back to talk about more Dragon Age Media Tie-Ins!

Title: Hard in Hightown Author: Varric Tethras (with Mary Kirby) Year Published: 2019 In-World Year: 9:33 Dragon Verdict: I mean, it's Varric doing what he does best — telling stories. At only 72 pages, why wouldn't you read it??

Hard in Hightown is a noir murder mystery set in Kirkwall. It follows Donnen Bren— look, I'm going to be honest, I can't remember character names because they're all just DA2 characters with the serial numbers filed off. Varric populated his most popular serial with his friends and I absolutely love him for it.

The main character Donnen is obviously guardsman Donnic, but with some Varric flare thrown in. Carver is the rookie Donnen's been saddled with. Merrill, Fenris, Isabela, Aveline, and Hawke all make appearances.

As do The Executors. Which is the one thing that REALLY caught my attention beyond all this fun whodunnit nonsense. When do we first learn about Those Across the Sea? If I'm not mistaken, THIS book is the first time.

Of course, there are chapters of Hard in Hightown spread all over Inquisition, and the Executors are included in a war table mission, "Unmask Those Across the Sea" but... Why is the first time we learn of them in a work of fiction?

And how does Varric know about them?

Sure, they're dismissed as a sort of myth or legend, and aren't ACTUALLY in the story, but still. That's weird, right?

Anyway, other than the Executors, there isn't any lore here. It's just Varric writing "Friend fiction" as Bela would say. But what I loved most about it is that it FEELS like Varric. It SOUNDS like Varric. He even breaks the fourth wall and bungles his own 3rd person POV because he didn't want to research boats, which made me cackle (big mood, Varric).

So, hat's off to Mary Kirby. Her brilliance really shines through on this one when you stop to think about it. She's writing Varric writing Donnen and it's absolutely stunning work.

And it's just plain fun!

[mikkeneko]

fic writer meme - 5 or 11? 👀

5) What's a genre that you'd like to try writing?

Hmm, I don't feel that I have a good answer for this -- I will occasionally branch out into a new genre, but usually in response to some kind of prompt or challenge, not necessarily because I want to do it for its own sake. Also I'm not necessarily sure what falls under the category of 'genre' here? I go back and forth between comedy, drama/adventure and horror on a fairly regular rotation, and have occasionally experimented with things like Noir (The Chained City) or Cyberpunk-ish (TTL Kirkwall Station) but I can't think of any one genre that I haven't done, that I'm particularly itching to do. Like, there are either so many that doing them all would be impossible?

11) Do you have a favorite dynamic to write?

Based on how many times I've appended author's notes that boil down to "Sorry guys, the banter between these two characters just took over this chapter," I think I'd have to say that my favorite dynamic is Manzai Comedy Duo. 😂 Two characters who are either siblings or close but slightly vitriolic friends, who know each other incredibly well but still disagree enough to spark off each other, and without necessarily any kind of romantic chemistry. Most recent examples of Those Two Guys are Shang Qinghua-Shen Qingqiu and Jiang Cheng-Wei Wuxian, but I think I've also hit that note sometimes with Loki-Thor and Kurogane-Fai in the past.

[morrigan-disapproves]

My dragon Age Veilguard likes/dislikes/general opinions under the cut (with one major late game spoiler)

[ETA: Scream ok so i started writing this post like 3 weeks ago after completing the game but then forgot about finishing it. done now]

Stuff I enjoyed:

Faction backgrounds good concept mostly well executed, it was giving DA:O

Visually incredibly pretty game

Character creator best they've ever done it. The amount of options are amazing

The combat is fun! Fast paced and reactive. I played warrior and genuinely enjoyed hitting people with a big hammer and/or throwing my shield at them. Going to try mage next [ETA: this was a lie. I started a rogue playthrough instead and enjoy it]

Companion specific hangout missions are fun, I enjoyed walking and talking

Neve Gallus v compelling character, love to see a woman succeeding in a male dominated field (emotionally repressed noir detective). Her voice actress was also really great

Grey. Warden. Plots. I thought all the stuff with the wardens was compelling and gripped me, from the Weisshaupt mission to the creeping horror of the blight and the info about where the blight really came from

Cities are so back! Really liked Minrathous and Treviso as environments, they felt like deep and real places. Much better than completely empty Val Royeaux in inquisition. I liked Minrathous more bc it's fucked up: welcome back kirkwall da2!

Factions in general good concept, even if some of them had their edges sanded off a bit (more below)

Side quests always felt relevant to the overarching plot, this is another area they really improved on from inquisition

The endgame missions/content was good, a marked improvement in quality on the rest of the game overall. I found it very funny that even the negative reviews I read agreed on this point: gotta hand it to em I suppose!

Loved the Varric reveal. I had clocked that he was dead since the beginning but not that it was solas tricking you about it. I thought it was a cole-type situation, like where a spirit thinks it's a dead person. This is much better and crunchier.

Stuff I did not enjoy:

Mid writing on average

Slow start. Like I shouldn't be having to say "oh it gets really fun once you pick up all the companions" when that's like 15+ hours into the game

Twee music choices. Emmrich and Bellara especially fighting for their lives against this in their character missions

Companion characters don't really get to have flaws? Like not major ones - I kept waiting for more to be revealed but it just never came. OK they've all never done anything wrong in their lives ever. For a game supposedly about regret it's a missed opportunity

Same story re: the factions, especially the antivan crows. They are assassins! In the past games they were way more fucked up as an organisation - it would have been interesting to be forced by circumstance to work with them. Let there be some moral complexity?

Romance content felt thin. I guess a side effect of having every character be romance-able? Wait I counted and 7 is actually the same number of romances as in inquisition. I think my main issue is actually that the pacing was bizarre (very slow/late in the game)

Playing an elf was weirdly frictionless - I get they are trying to kind of clean up perceived more problematic elements of the series, but it was crazy to be playing an elf in Tevinter, elf-racism capital of thedas, who experiences no prejudice vs the experience playing an elf in the previous games set in the south. I think they got shit for their (admittedly poor and shaky) handing of fantasy racism in previous games but I think people (me) wanted them to do it better rather than cutting it all together

This is especially weird when the portrayal of the qunari still remains very orientalist. let's not get started on those lords of fortune armours

While I enjoyed the writing of the warden plots especially, I do think that having "blighted" be like a temporary status effect you can get but recover from (???) is insane and lore breaking. They should have made you have to undergo the joining if it happens too often lmao

???? Stuff:

The illuminati from across the sea made everyone do it in the secret ending? I saw the writers already trying to walk this back on twitter lmao but I think it's silly

Final thoughts:

Worth playing for me, I enjoyed the experience overall and already am halfway into a second playthrough

I think I will let the game marinate a bit and maybe write some fanfic to address aspects I feel they missed. If anyone has good (gay) fanfic recs already please send them my way, the situation was bleak when I last checked ao3 the other month

For me this has more replay value and I got on with it better than inquisition

[ETA: I since started playing bg3 as well and I think the first act plot pacing of that is markedly better vs da4 so far. However I find the bg3 combat to be so so tiresome and the cc options limited in terms of body diversity. Also im not that familiar with bg1/2 or dnd in general so if there's annoying lore change stuff that bothers diehard fans i have no idea lol]

Anyway I want to hear about everyone's thoughts!! and hear about their rooks

[princessshikky]

Just a thought

Neve with her noir detective vibes would've fit in well in Kirkwall. Whereas Fenris would've been a fine Shadow Dragon.

[thedastrash]

WIP Wednesday!

Now that my exchange pieces are waiting for Arlathan and Templartations reveals... time to pull out some huge WIPs I've been ignoring and see if I can poke at them until some plot falls out. Here's a chunk of Varric that I like, but I'm not sure where it lives yet. Tags below the cut as usual.

--

Wind howled over the Frostbacks, piling snow drifts against the windward side of every building in Haven. The tent Varric had been given was surprisingly large which meant it was also drafty. He was able to set up a small table and a stool within the canvas walls, but the wax wasn’t enough to keep out the wind. Snowflakes blew in under the walls, wind threatened to whip his papers out from beneath his quill, and his fingers grew numb from the chill. 

Perhaps that was enough writing for the evening. Placing his work away carefully, where snow couldn’t dampen its corners, he pulled on his leather jacket. Not the best for the weather, but he didn’t get a chance to pack up when he was forcibly hauled out of Kirkwall on a death march to this frigid rock. At least it was his favorite jacket. And it had nice runes. Thank you Sandal.

“Fucking mountains. Nothing but ice and death,” he grumbled to himself as he pulled his gloves on. He braced himself, but the wind when he opened the tent still made him clench his jaw. All his warmth seemed to evaporate from beneath the collar of his jacket and his ears immediately felt raw and miserable. He should find a scarf, or maybe a hat, from the supplies, but his dignity wouldn’t let him. He’d rather be fashionable than warm.

Cassandra stood like a statue in the training yard, watching Cullen work with the recruits. This was her fault really. She’d kidnapped Varric from Kirkwall and interrogated him for days. He made sure she knew it too. 

“Nice weather we’re having,” Varric quipped from behind her.

Cassandra didn’t even flinch, though she couldn’t have heard him approach. He was far too stealthy to be caught out like that, even in the snow. She turned her head and merely grunted her agreement with a slight furrow to her brow. Always suspicious, the Seeker.

“Couldn’t the Inquisition hole up on a beach somewhere? I hear Rivain is lovely this time of year,” Varric tried again.

Cassandra wasn’t having any of his good humor today. “You are free to go.”

“I will hold those words dear,” Varric laughed. “How I’ve longed to hear them from your lips.”

A small noise of disgust came from Cassandra’s throat before she stalked off to speak to Cullen. Varric wondered if she was staying warm through sheer stubbornness. Her armor seemed better suited to a lower elevation, less ice, more bodies on the ground. Maybe her wrath kept her warm.

Varric made his way into the warmth of the chantry. Appropriate to have taken over a chantry for the dubious organization of the Inquisition. The fires were banked low, but the sheer number of people inside helped warm it up considerably. The air was moist with evaporating puddles and the breath of huddled people in conversation. The camp had been fairly jolly after the last success on the Storm Coast. The Chargers had cheered things up with their irreverent celebrations and their get shit done kind of attitude. The Iron Bull and company were Varric’s kind of people - loud and drunk and bloody. It made him miss Kirkwall if he didn’t keep busy.

No pressure tags: @author-a-holmes | @silvanils | @noire-pandora | @knuttydraws | @raflesia65 | @retrowondergirl | @morganlefaye79 | @charlatron | @kittynomsdeplume | @kemvee | @a-shakespearean-in-paris | @jentrevellan | @isk4649 | @charmcity-jess | @cleverblackcat @dismalzelenka @sulky-valkyrie @dalish-rogue @pierogipie @anderstrevelyan @favorofthewater @anatidae-dragonage @midnightprelude @highwayphantoms @transandersrights @jellydishes @syrupwit @captaincadash @barbex @potatowitch @ocean-in-my-rebel-soul @glowing-blue-feathermage and anyone else who would like to share <3 Tag me so I can see what you're up to!!

[anneapocalypse]

first sentences of my last ten fics

Tagged by @skyeventide 💜 thank you!

Trust not a Herald's counsel. - A Hero Sleeps in Gwaren (Dragon Age, Briala/Female Tabris, current WIP)

It's been years since Shianni set foot outside Denerim. - What We Can Do Together (Dragon Age, Shianni/Briala)

Theron was still having the nightmares. - For You, Anywhere (Dragon Age, Male Mahariel/Tamlen)

The thing is, it has to have been there the whole time. - Objects of Wonder (Dragon Age, Lavellan & Sera)

In her oldest memories, the ones that fade more with every passing winter, she is little and hungry. - A Pot to Piss In (Dragon Age, Sera backstory, gen)

There's something different about Shepard, since Tali has returned to the Normandy SR-2. - Between Us (Mass Effect, Tali/Female Shepard)

He knows it now, the aroma of Sencha green tea. - Sencha Green (Person of Interest, Reese/Finch)

The problem with being a writer is you get a feel for how stories end. - Someone Else's Story (Dragon Age, Varric & Hawke)

The second attempt on Arl Tabris's life came upon her visit to Denerim for First Day. - No Woman Rules Alone (Dragon Age, Anora/Female Tabris)

"Do you miss Kirkwall?" - Far From Home (Dragon Age, Fenris/Female Hawke)

Tagging! @chocochipbiscuit @ziskandra @fivekoboldsinacoat @rosella-writes @warpedlegacy @rakshadow @inquisimer @nirikeehan @noire-pandora @darethshirl and anyone else who wants to play.

[ohmypawsandwhiskers]

Last Line Meme tagged by @the-rebel-archivist

Rules:  In a new post, show the last line you wrote and tag as many people as there are words.

From my mass effect Valentines prompt:

The look is unfamiliar to Kei. In all the time she has known Garrus, he has never shown hesitancy to be close to her, but she shrugs it off, counting it as something she is reading too much into as she plucks a silver streamer from his fringe and teases, “Between the blush and the streamer, though, it seems like you’re getting into the holiday spirit.”

Tagging: @curiousthimble @askweisswolf @athenril-of-kirkwall @astudyincontrasts @girlwondersteph @hanatsuki89 @kirkwallgremlin @roseategales @roguelioness @in-arlathan @ink-and-dagger @impossible-rat-babies @noire-pandora and anyone that wants to do this!

[deusexlachina]

Wannabe Warden Part 3 (Varric and Anders): Fail to impress a Grey Warden

In which I would like to perform a daring rescue for a Grey Warden but am far too weak and instead install my transition goals as chief of police so I can recruit powerful criminals without fear of legal reprisal.

A year into my mercenary life, someone decides to rob me. A clean-shaven dwarf named Varric comes to my rescue, and advises the pickpocket to find a different line of work where he doesn't pick fights with people he can't handle, life advice that would have immensely benefited me a year ago.

There were a number of Varric mods, but most of them took away either his beardless face or his tits-out chest, both of which are iconic enough to be the focus of his tarot card in Inquisition.

I am perverse but not that perverse. So I only give him a more OP-looking Bianca, which is a package deal with a blue shirt.

Varric introduces himself, saying he's heard the name "Hawke" a lot, presumably from Other Aveline, who uses the term insistently in a desperate attempt to avoid a situation in which I'm Aveline and she's Other Aveline.

Varric asks me to invest in an expedition to the Deep Roads, which I would suspect is a con, except he has a friendly face and the avuncular voice of Brian Bloom.

This is my chance! In the Deep Roads, I can not only fight darkspawn, but if I'm lucky, encounter some Grey Wardens who will be happy to have a new recruit. The Deep Roads Expedition becomes the focus of my life - my Main Quest, if you will.

Varric says that the expedition has everything it needs besides my help, fifty gold coins, and also a map to where the expedition is heading. So. It has everything except everything it needs. Fortunately, Varric hears rumours of a Grey Warden in Kirkwall. I hope it's Good Queen Morwen! She's a badass! I hear she's a better tank than a warrior. (I didn't take her name because everyone knows her and it would just seem arrogant).

Unfortunately, it is Anders, who is only not known as the goofy chucklefuck of the Wardens because he fought alongside Oghren.

However - despite the jaunty tuquoise-and-yellow robe I've put him in - this is a much sadder Anders than the playful little goblin in Amaranthine. He merged with his friend, Justice, a startling twist of events that is very impactful if you know either of these characters, as I didn't on my first playthrough and Aveline doesn't either. After Justice came inside Anders' body, their relationship changed forever. Without boundaries between them, Anders lost his mirth and Justice lost his cool head. Two noble souls become worse than the sum of their parts.

I'm just here for a Grey Warden to take me to the Grey Warden tunnels so I can drink Grey Warden juice to become a Grey Warden. I ask him for help on the Deep Roads expedition, and he offers it if I can rescue his boyfriend, another runaway mage. Unfortunately, this is a trap, and unfortunatelyer, I am not strong enough to fight my way out of the trap, because this is Nightmare Ultra. So before I can get stronger by having Anders on my side, I need to get strong enough to fight my way out of a trap.

I start with helping Other Aveline with her new job, which is being a cop, because the cops saved her miserable life and also because Other Aveline sucks. Aveline Cops Are Bastards. This is extremely punishing, but eventually, I manage to save Guardsman Donnic, who has a crush on me even though I've never seen him before in my life. The chaser fuck.

In a plotline that makes me feel like Varric wanted to write noir, Donnic testifies to corruption within the guard that goes right to the top. I use this as leverage to install Other Aveline as Captain of the Guard, giving me the exact sort of illicit connection to the police that got her predecessor fired, because, as we will see time and again, Kirkwall has not invented the Rule of Law.

[safereturndoubtful]

On St Ninian’s Beach

26th June 2023

I had booked the most basic accommodation on the overnight boat from Kirkwall to Lerwick, a reclining seat. But I had hoped not to use it, preferring the illegal option of staying in my van bed. I had researched on the internet and read that it was something truckers did do. An article from an incident in January of 2006 was easily found, when in stormy conditions three trucks had toppled over during the crossing. On arrival in Lerwick it was found 6 drivers had stayed in their cabs, one stuck there until he was rescued.

Northlink stresses how dangerous it is, yet they are quite happy to let my dog stay there.. do they value his life any less than mine? By circumstance rather than choice, I boarded last, and had to reverse on with the studious attention of all the boarding crew. At the appropriate moment I disappeared behind the curtain. They either didn’t see, or weren’t bothered. Before the boat sailed I was in bed, waking at 7:15 am as drivers returned to their vehicles. The coach driver next to me gave me a knowing nod. It was clear he had done the same.

By 8 am I was at St Ninian’s Beach, about a half hour drive away, in heavy rain and just 9C. Roja and I had breakfast, and I read while Roja dozed and the rain eased, and by mid-morning the cloud cleared and the sun emerged.

This is my second visit of the year to the Wild Atlantic coast, the first being the Costa del Morte in Galicia in February, equally impressive.

The first photo is of the ruin of St Ninians’s Chapel, which dates back to the 12th Century. Before that it was an Iron Age Burial Ground. It’s other claim to fame is that in 1958 a local schoolboy found a wooden box on the site, which contained 28 silver objects of Pictish treasure.

St Ninian’s Isle is quite a spectacular sight from the car park, with its jagged rock cliffs, strikingly green pasture, and it’s shell-sand tombolo, the finest example of one in Western Europe. It is occasionally breached, in storms and at high tide, but today it was at its best, a superb wander though Roja chose not to use it and swim alongside for most of the way.

The perimeter of the Isle is about four and a half miles, but most who walk as far as the island, then choose shortcuts. As with most of the ocean facing coasts here, the south and west headlands are the wildest and most spectacular. There were a few other visitors. I met the couple in the other campervan at the carpark, from Durham, and prior to that at Dentdale, and we chatted for a while.

We were back at the van for 2 pm, and spent the afternoon with the dramatic backdrop trying to concentrate enough to attend to a few business matters.

Last week here was the Shetland Noir Book Festival, attended by writers such as Martin Edwards, Val McDermid, Ann Cleeves and Elly Griffiths. They even had a session here at St Ninian’s Beach. Cleeves write the Shetland series, that has now been adapted for television. It strikes me that the literary body count here on the tranquil Shetland Islands is bigger than most places, with the possible exception of Midsomer.

These rocky outcrops put me in mind of Chris Cameron, who is currently mid-way through his 60 day record attempt for the longest stay on a remote uninhabited North Atlantic rock, on Rockall, 200 miles west of St Kilda, and 300 miles from the mainland. It says a lot about the teaching profession that a guy has to go to such lengths to get a peaceful break. Maybe he won’t return to his post, and stay on Rockall.

Roja seems unbothered by the various dive-bomb attacks from the sea birds he receives. They concern themselves with him rather than me thankfully. With my untrained eye, those who bombed him include, the Fulmar which comes off the cliffs and hovers in the wind, the territorial Curlew with its recognisable squeal and curved beak from the scrub land, and the much rarer Arctic Tern from its slumber in the grass.

And a ‘spot-the-van’ pic..

[ravioliage]

Honestly, Veilguard wrapped it all up nicely for me. I don't think I want another huge mainline game. My daughters are resting, because Rook did good. I do though really truly want spinoffs of small adventures in other regions. I don't want to save the world anymore.

Like, I want to play as a Crow chosen to take a contract against King Markus to see what the fuck is happening over there. Or a Shadow Dragon detective working with Neve LA Noire style where you have to use your brain. I'll fucking even take House Flipper in Kirkwall.

There is a lot of potential for a new game in a dragon age setting that isn't a 60 hr rpg, as much as I love those.

Unfortunately, EA.

I hope if there is a new dragon spinoff we get to visit Nevarra more in depth because what in the FUCK is going on there.

[redinkofshame]

Kirkwall Noir

I tried to combine traditional Noir with Hard in Hightown to bring us Varric Tethras, Private Eye. These thirteen codex-sized chapters are filled with drugs, sex, violence, and old timey slang. I’ll be posting one a day on tumblr, and then I’ll post them all at once on  AO3. 

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

Chapter 13

Thing slowed down after that, just a little. The coppers threw a big funeral for the boys in blue that had gone down during the drive by, claiming they had been killed in the line of duty. Apparently I’d made a clean sneak of it, because no one came calling with questions. Just to be safe, I moved out of my flophouse and into my office.

With Marigold’s information I was able to find Athenril, the smuggler that lead the lyrium distribution of Hightown. After that, with the help of the Hawke twins, I was able to finger a few of her lackeys.

Then came the waiting. The best bet was to make my move after the next shipment. It was almost two weeks before the next Qunari ship came in. I staked out the Police Captain’s house, camera in hand, biding my time.

It took nearly two days of watching, but wouldn’t you know it: the day after the ship pulled in to port an elf named Tallis paid old Jeven a visit. I recognized her from her little talks with Athenril, though I suspected she actually worked for the Qunari. Either way, she went into Jeven’s back entrance with a heavy package and left without it some time later.

Film tucked away in my briefcase, my cane and I limped away from my stakeout position…

… and Directly into an ambush. I stepped into a plaza and found myself surrounded. A dozen heeled men poured out from the alleys and doorways.

No, not just men — cops, all of them.

Then Jeven strolled out. “Well done, Mr. Tethras. You’ve stumbled upon a case worthy of a real detective,” he sneered. “Too bad you won’t live long enough to collect!”

I was stuck— no cover, no time to pull out Bianca… I braced myself, squeezing my eyes closed. A few moments later when I was still alive and didn’t hear any gunfire I peek one eye open, then the other.

I was still surrounded by officers, but those officers were surrounded by other officers. Jeven’s men held up their hands as Aveline’s men pressed barrels to their backs.

Officer Valen herself strolled into the plaza. “It’s over, Jeven. Throw down your weapon.”

He hesitated, and she leveled her own gun at him.

“I said drop it!”

With a growl he did.

And, with that, it was over. She cuffed him, and read him his rights. Aveline made a successful coup over the corrupt cops of Hightown.

“You were following me? How did you know?” I asked her.

“Ask her,” Aveline answered, nodding to a figure walking into the scene.

It was Marigold, of course. I should have known. “I told her to keep an eye on you after the next ship,” she explained with a shrug. “Just in case. Sorry they took so long for them to get here.”

“What made you so sure I needed help?” I asked.

“Well, I wasn’t sure you would, but I figured this was the most peaceful resolution. If you’d come forward with the evidence first…” She shrugged. “I didn’t want anyone to get hurt.”

I shook my head. She looked so guilty I just had to pull her in for a kiss. “Thank you, Sweetheart. You saved my life today.”

She smiled that perfect smile of hers. “I couldn’t just leave you, after you decided to go through with this.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s not as if you’ll get paid for this, right? I don’t imagine Dulci will be happy with the information I heard Officer Valen found in Jeven’s office...”

I sighed. Yeah, I had thought of that. This was why I always asked for half up front.

After a few moments of watching cops dragging other cops away, she said. “I already talked her in to giving you a reward. It ought to keep you in business for a couple more months. It’s not much, but it’s the least she can do after you making the biggest drug bust of the decade!”

I pulled her in tight, arm around her waist. “I bet it’ll go a lot farther than that with you as our new accountant,” I said with a grin, and kissed her soundly.

[handers-time]

2022 Handers Exchange Round-up! 

Hi everyone, hope you’re having a fantastic day! The deadline has passed, and the Handers Gift Exchange 2022 has officially come to an end!

Twenty-eight of you beautiful souls signed up to exchange gifts, and with the aid of a further four participants who contributed treats/pinch-hits, we produced thirty-one Handers gifts for each other. Congratulations all around! On behalf of organiser Reikah (@faux-fires) and myself (@hollyand-writes), a HUGE thank you and well done to all! 

I’ve compiled a list below of all the amazing gifts shared over the course of this exchange, but before I share it I just wanted to go through some AOB:

Again, a huge thank you readers, artists, writers, commenters and kudos’ers! It’s people like you who make the Handers fandom a fun, hectic, frequently explicit but mostly supportive environment, and as the exchange moderator, thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the enthusiasm. This exchange could not have gone ahead without you and I’d love to thank you all for your hard work, enthusiasm and cheerleading – you’ve made this exchange a joy to run. A round of applause for you – you deserve it!

All that remains is for you to read and enjoy all the badass works of art produced for this exchange – and don’t forget to comment on any gifts you received, as per the rules at the exchange sign-ups: “You must comment on any gift written for you. For a full gift, this should be a comment of at least 3 lines in length.” 

Finally, I’d just like to remind you all that the AO3 collection will be open for another two weeks for any additional treats you feel like writing! The prompt list is available here as always. 

Under the cut is the list of gifts! Please note all warnings on original AO3 headers. 

F!Handers Gifts

Title: I Will Follow by @noire-pandora for @amervalk (Teen)  Summary: A fortress for you and me to hide in, Hawke insisted and when Hawke insisted, Anders followed. 

Title: The Last Light by @justcallmecappy for @highwayphantoms (General Audiences)   Summary: “Promise you’ll come back to me,” he said in a quiet voice. Hawke tightened her grip on his hand; felt reassured when he squeezed back.   

Title: In Allure’s Gaze by @amervalk for @dismalzelenka (Explicit)   Summary: Hannigram AU. Dr. Marian Hawke and Anders are assigned to work together by Grand Enchanter Orsino, years after Knight Commander Meredith Stannard's arrest for her crimes against the mages of Kirkwall. 

Title: You’re Home by @imperatrixvini for @tossasnake (Mature)   Summary: A reunion (of sorts), a date (of sorts), and some love and support. 

Title: Nothing But Time by @dismalzelenka for @noire-pandora (Explicit)   Summary: Hawke appraises him like a meal, like prey. He is helpless beneath her gaze, pinned like an insect, held under by eyes that remind him of cocoa and freshly turned earth. 

Title: he’s so pretty, when he goes down on me by @anatidae-dragonage / @anders-did-nothing-wrong for @raflesia65 (Explicit)   Summary: “Hawke? Did you make sure it was just us tonight on purpose?”  “Maybe," she whispered, endeared that the thought hadn't occurred to him until now. 

Title: lost little bluebird by @highwayphantoms for @daneel-the-sister-of-castiel (General Audiences)   Summary: A Champion rises... and quietly takes in a runaway magelet when no one is looking.  

Title: Ataraxia by @daneel-the-sister-of-castiel for @anatidae-dragonage (General Audiences)   Summary: Ataraxia - a state of freedom from emotional disturbance and anxiety; tranquility. Freedom has always seemed out of reach for Hawke and Anders. Years after leaving Kirkwall, they seem to have finally found it. 

NB!Handers Gifts

Title: Ghosts of Aeonar by @rusted-pipe-of-wisdom for @transandersrights (Mature)  Summary: Hawke and Anders arrive at Aeonar, a mage prison, to investigate the disappearance of its inhabitants. It gets weird. 

Title: Home is Where the Hawke Roosts by Temptingnoon / @tossasnake for @dreadwolfish (Teen)  Summary: Getting used to having anything is about ten times harder when you feel you don't deserve any of it, as Anders discovers. 

M!Handers Gifts

Title: Rainbow Kitten Surprise by @realace for @rusted-pipe-of-wisdom (Teen) Summary: They'd been exchanging, well, gifts, one could call it. 

Title: This is our war by @factorykat for Ashura (General Audiences) Summary: With Kirkwall behind them, Anders is struggling with how to feel, and what Julian must think of him. 

Title: One Good Turn Deserves Another by @pinkfadespirit for @laniardraws (Explicit) Summary: In which Garrett Hawke is a Fereldan noble and Anders is a healer working free of the Circle. 

Title: Sleeping Together by @goth-surana for @un-shit-yourself (Teen) Summary: Four times Hawke and Anders "slept together" before their relationship began. Oops one bed! With angst and pining! 

Title: Now we are happy by @raflesia65 for @justcallmecappy (General Audiences) Summary: Artwork. One day Varric received a painting with an envelope attached, inside there was a note... 

Title: Awaken and return to you by @transandersrights for @realace (Teen) Summary: Anders wakes up injured in an unfamiliar bed. The man attending to him claims to be a friend; Anders knows he's lying. 

Title: Best Laid Plans by Ashura for @hollyand-writes (Teen) Summary: Hawke has a plan to help his brother get a date. No really, it's a great plan. A brilliant plan.   

Title: as inseparable as fire and light by @glowing-blue-feathermage for @ser-thirst-a-lot (Mature) Summary: After fleeing Kirkwall together, Hawke and Anders are separated for months as Hawke works with the Inquisition and Anders hides in an isolated cabin on the Storm Coast. 

Title: for a moment we were able to be still by @pinkfadespirit for @clownygutz (Mature) Summary: Artwork. An evening at the Hawke estate. Anders and Hawke are happy and in love. 

Title: Rebels with a cause by @factorykat for @hollyand-writes, @faux-fires, @glowing-blue-feathermage, @noire-pandora & @un-shit-yourself (General Audiences) Summary: A fluffy little short, set in between DA2 and Inquisition, while Hawke and Anders enjoy some small celebrations amongst the rebels. 

Title: Battlemages by @legoprime for @factorykat (General Audiences) Summary: Artwork. Battle boyfriends on the Wounded Coast. 

Title: Source of Joy by @laniardraws for @glowing-blue-feathermage (General Audiences) Summary: Artwork. After Divine Victoria disbands the Circles and declares Anders officially pardoned, he and Hawke (and Justice) settle in a small cottage in Fereldan countryside with the orphaned kid they adopted along the way.  

Title: The Uses of Sorrow by @monsterthalia for @goth-surana (Mature) Summary: Anders is captured by the Templars. The entire gang swings into action to get him back.  

Title: The Gifts That Kept Giving by @hollyand-writes for @storybookhawke (Teen)  Summary: Four times Hawke spoiled Anders, and one time Anders spoiled Hawke. 

Title: Honeymoon by @storybookhawke for @faux-fires (General Audiences) Summary: Artwork. Anders never had a place to call home, until the love of his life asked to share his life with him. 

Title: Set on Fire to Keep You Warm by @ser-thirst-a-lot for @pinkfadespirit (Teen) Summary: With Justice, Anders had become much more sensitive to the presence of mana and pieces of the Fade in the waking world—and with Hawke’s help, even more so. 

Title: The Seamaiden Fair by @midnightprelude for @murderspice (Teen) Summary: Pirate AU. Garrett catches a stowaway on Isabela’s ship and quickly finds himself pining for the runaway healer. 

Title: Writer’s Block by @dismalzelenka for @murderspice (Teen) Summary: Modern AU. Varric drags the crew out to the woods for a weekend of live action roleplay to kick start inspiration for his novel. It's all fun and games until Garrett realizes everyone is taking this far more seriously than he is. 

Title: And But For the Sky There Are No Fences Facing by Ashura for @faux-fires, @ser-thirst-a-lot, @glowing-blue-feathermage, @celemee, @noire-pandora & @justcallmecappy (Teen) Summary: After the end of Inquisition, Hawke and Anders take up the Inquisitor's offer of a home on the Storm Coast.  

Title: Celebrated Air by @un-shit-yourself for @celemee (Mature) Summary: Regency AU. Surgeon Anders Justice, the rebellious second son of an upper-class family, makes a reluctant visit to Tethras Gardens on the Wounded Coast, and keeps a record of the events of the holiday in his journal. 

Title: The Maker Laughs at Plans by @little--abyss for @monsterthalia (Teen) Summary: It's been written before: Anders comes with Hawke to the Inquisition. But what if Varric (and Carver, since he's the Inquisitor in this one) didn't stop there?

[musetta3]

Last Lines Monday

Thanks for the tag, @rakshadow! Tagging @in-arlathan @cleverblackcat @poetikat @tkwritesdumbassassins @fandomn00blr @thevikingwoman @noire-pandora and any who would like join in!

Here’s a bit of a DADWC prompt, where Sebastian and the Kirkwall Crew plan Hawke a surprise birthday party. Her injuries after dueling the Arishok forbid her from walking to the venue, but that isn’t stopping Seb and Fenris from getting her there!

They improvised a palanquin as best they could: two curtain rods became their carrying poles, a serving tray acted as a footrest lashed to the chair legs. A guest room’s curtains sacrificed their fringe and tassels to decorate the oversized umbrella Fenris had found in a broom closet; the two friends stepped back, admiring their work. 

“…Will she like it, do ye think?” Sebastian asked. “It’s…” he frowned as the stubborn umbrella tipped to the left again. 

“It’s the thought that counts,” Fenris replied, “we’re not carpenters. The only hammers we know how to wield are warhammers...”

[weaponizedvirtue]

Four different stories, four different fandoms. God, I'm a masochist.

What Lurks Beyond (Sterdew Noir)

Kidding the Moon (mafia story inspired by a friend and the Time Princess app)

Sing, O Muse (Dragon Age Inquisition - Elvish Bard Inquisitor)

[NOT YET TITLED] (Peaky Blinders female soldier x Thomas Shelby)

@mikhailvalhidris​ @straight-outta-kirkwall​

Thank you so much for the tag, @zablife! This was so fun!

Rules: reveal the titles of the documents in your WIP folder and tag as many people as there are documents. Let others ask questions about the ones that interest them and post snippets or explain the contents as you see fit!

I have a massive amount of WIPs, so I decided to list the ones that I've actually at least started writing, and not the ones that are currently only outlined:

Fashionably Late (Robert Fischer x OC)

Here, Kitty Kitty (Robert Fischer x OC)

Waiting for a Train (Robert Fischer x OC)

Forever (Robert Fischer x OC)

Accepted (Tommy Shelby x Grace Burgess x OC)

Lady of the Various Sorrows (Tommy Shelby x Grace Burgess x OC)

Moth (Tommy Shelby x Grace Burgess x OC)

In the Bleak Midwinter (Tommy Shelby x Grace Burgess x OC)

Tagging @unluckycat111, @moral-terpitude, @shelbydelrey, @eclecticwildflowers, @cillmequick, @call-sign-shark, @runnning-outof-time, and @confidentandgood

[inquisimer]

tagged (a while ago adsfjkl) by @queenaeducan to share some recent fics! tysm tas, I lost track of my tag games but I appreciate you💜

Shards of Glass - one shot, G, 3304 words

vignettes of Nika Brosca’s life in Dust Town, from discovery in the Deep Roads to conscription by Duncan

In Thousands of Agonies - one shot, T, 5412 words

In a bid to save her lover, Mari Hawke turns Neria Surana over to Kirkwall’s Circle, where she is made Tranquil assistant to the Knight Captain. Years later, Cassandra and Leliana come to Kirkwall in search of answers - and find some they didn’t know they needed.

Softly Uttered Curse - one shot, G, 2401 words

Post-Trespasser, Neria Surana Lavellan struggles with her missing limb and how she fits into Merrill’s plans for the upcoming Arlathvhen. Written for Dalish Week 2022!

Roses Into the Abyss - long fic, G (for now), 8 chapters posted, 32,989 words

Main fic for my Inquisitor, Neria Surana Lavellan. After a childhood in Kinloch Hold, years dodging Templars in Kirkwall, and a brief stint with the Dalish, Neria finds herself navigating a religious mantle she doesn’t want, as well as complicated politics, life-threatening oddities, and a past that just won’t stay there.

Deception to Come - one shot, T, 3125 words

Vignettes of the complicated romance between mage!Hawke and Anders, covering the entire game from recruitment to chantry boom boom BOOM. Originally written as a DADWC prompt fill for my best friend based on lyrics from Liar by the Arcadian Wild.

and sending tags to @roguelioness | @nirikeehan | @a11sha11fade | @brainworm-terrarium | @noire-pandora | @bluewren if y’all are so inclined!