#Just STab Me Now

[onaslansside]

Excellent news! The novelization of the Fantasy Heroine youtube shorts series is out, and it's good! $3 for the pre-ordered ebook would have been well worth it just for Leo's POV. I mean, look at him refusing the Only One Bed scenario the author is trying to force her heroine into:

But there's so much more! There's Caroline's life, and the things that drive her to write the way she does! There's absolutely all of the characters refusing to act like two-dimensional fictional characters who only care about the superficial physical attractiveness of whoever they're supposed to be shipped with!! And instead finding partners who actually have compatible values and life goals!!!

And it's *also* still a fun silly fantasy romance adventure!

[cloudgremlin-art]

Faux book cover for Jill Bearup’s book Just Stab Me Now- I’ve always wanted to do some faux book covers and the release of this one was the motivation I needed. That, and a good concept sketch XD

Cover art without text/etc:

Concept sketches:

[artistsfuneral]

[supercheesecakemiracle]

Me, after reading a 300 page book cover to cover in one afternoon: Yeah I still got it

[thegreenleavesofspring]

Girl help, last time I read a story with this many male characters I ADORED it was Lord of the Rings.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Sometimes the Adaptation is the Book, Actually...

So, as I'm sure more than a few of you did, I enjoyed the heck out of Jill Bearup's fantasy heroin YouTube shorts series. And as I'm sure many of us have experienced, YouTuber books can be...distinctly hit-or-miss in terms of quality. So when Bearup announced that she was adapting the shorts series into an actual book, I was willing to give it a shot when it came out. So in Bearup's own tier list terms, I'd give this book a pretty good. Strong concept, a lot to like...but the TYPESETTING, my god. Let's talk Just Stab Me Now.

This is your spoiler warning for a book that has been EXTREMELY hyped on YouTube, and one who's story has already been told on YouTube. Here there be Spoilers.

So normally I like to start with the things I like about a book, but since I liked so much about this book and the one thing that I didn't like could have stopped me cold, we're going to start with the one thing that I think was actually bad. The typesetting.

To be clear: Bearup was extremely clear that using different fonts and margins to delineate between Caroline's world, the fantasy world, and Caroline's mind where she interacts with the fantasy characters was a considered, intentional choice. That's valid, and there is nothing inherently wrong with making that choice. It's also well done in the book, like it's consistent and well put together.

That said: Oh my god you guys, I hated it. It took me the first fifty-odd pages to get used to it, and even then, it AGGRESSIVELY snapped my editor brain's bra strap. I seriously considered putting the book down because of the typesetting, which would have been a crying shame because I really enjoyed the book overall. This might not bother some readers, but it was nearly a dealbreaker for me, so I wanted to mention it as a "your mileage may vary" kind of thing.

Other than that though, I think this book did a pretty solid job of adapting the fantasy heroine shorts into a full-blown novel.

Caroline Lindley is very much helicopter parenting her fictional characters, and the fact that they are by turns bemused and cranky about this is very fun throughout the novel. I also like that we get a lot more of Caroline in the novel than we did in the shorts series. Her story was just as compelling as Rosamund and Leo's, and I quite enjoyed having the extraordinarily modern cybersecurity subplot to balance the fantasy setting as well. I wasn't expecting that to work as well as it did, but thematically it resonated quite well, and I like the acknowledgement that while we don't use swords and political marriages so much these days, it's not like we've STOPPED having enemies and needing to protect ourselves, our homes, and our families. The relationship between modernity and "no particular historical era" in terms of thematic connections was really well done.

The general added depth to all the characters was also excellent, since we had time and space for characterization that the shorts series had to skim over for time. We really felt Rosamund's grief in the book, Leo had way more personality (and I loved that) and some of the plot stuff was smoothed and fleshed out in some really interesting ways. The caladrius was actually an inspired touch, and it tied together a bunch of slightly odd things in the series in a really elegant way. It also gave Baron Mabry and George an interesting parallel too, since they were both screwing over people for financial gain. The methods might be different, but the heart of the crimes and the harm they do are fairly universal.

As a writer, I also ADORED the conceit of Caroline being absolutely out of control in her process. She was trying SO HARD to write a standard enemies-to-lovers romantasy and literally nothing could get her plot or characters there. Every writer has been there, every writer has had little breakdowns over the story just not freaking doing what you tell it to, and there was something deeply vindicating about it. I loved the personification of the writing process.

This book also had a little bit of that Princess Bride feel where it is both a send-up of romance tropes and a deeply respectful nod to them. I don't know that pastiche is the right word here, but neither does parody seem to be, and I think we need a word for this writing mood, where you're both deconstructing and reiterating a series of tropes. I don't have a word for it, but this is a thing that pops up periodically (periodic because it's genuinely hard to do well; lean too far to one side or the other and it flops catastrophically) and we should name it.

Overall, for a book from a YouTuber--especially one who rather famously discovered halfway through the process that she does not enjoy writing fiction--I was pleasantly surprised by this book, and I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Bearup has told us not to expect a sequel, so I won't...but if one materialized in the future, I'd read it!

[shittygaypornmagazine]

Ok but what if I need a whole book about Caroline and Henry. Like what if I just. Need more.

[221bstrange]

why is being a student in Hong Kong so HARD? I'm studying for a minor test and I've cried three times?? 😭😭😭

[mer-acle]

Me: opens google

MC: please don't

Me: "does drawing blood leave scars"

MC: why would you even want to know that

Me: finds out that repeatedly drawing blood can indeed leave scars

MC: please keep that information away from my veins

Me: typing

MC: stop it

Me: it's perfect

MC: I want you ded even more than the villain

Me: that's two of us. I can offer you to use the torment I just invented for you as comeuppance against the villain in the final fight.

MC:

MC: okay fine

[iamfear]

NEW BOOK YESSSSSS

[artistsfuneral]

"I realise that you probably don't like me much right now, and I don't blame you, and I realise that this is a little forward, but... will you marry me?"

- Just Stab Me Now, p. 155

[510amy5]

Chapter 16

‘Don’t worry. If he snores too loudly, I’ll just smother him with a pillow again.’

Gotta love some terrible roommates lol. Caroline and Robin's plan has been set into motion. Caroline has arranged for the early arrival of the Baron and Robin is ready to have the conversation. Rosamund is, however, slightly suspicious.

Caroline? Are you planning something else?’ ‘Planning something?’ Caroline dropped a green tassel and looked up. ‘I think you have higher priorities at the moment than my aspirations for your romantic subplot.’

I find it interesting that Caroline has either come to terms with the fact that the romance is not main plot. She spent so long in the beginning pushing it as the framework for other plot point to hang withing but now the Plot has gotten too big it seems and she is ready to acknowledge that. Well done Caroline.

‘Leo? That was quick.’ ‘No, Uncle Robin,’ came the voice of his favourite not-actually-niece. ‘It’s me.’

This moment with Charlotte and Robin is so cute. Not least of which is because @marauderjojo is the not-actually-auntie (she's totally the auntie) to my little guy. Just makes me happy any time I see it happen elsewhere.

Unfortunately Caroline is having just as bad a time in the real world as she is writing. After some issue with the server at her workplace that she stumbled upon (possibly something criminal? I'm not sure I fully follow...) while doing assigned tasks that were NOT HER JOB she is getting hinted that she could get fired.

If that wasn’t a veiled threat, then Caroline was a triceratops. Stunned into silence, she could only nod blankly and try not to panic as she listened to the door click shut behind Annabel. Her mind was racing, but one thought stuck out in particular: Rosamund wouldn’t stand for this.

She is absolutely right about Rosamund and I can't wait to see where this goes!

We jump back to Robin and Leo. Robin correctly deduces that Leo is head over heels for Rosamund and gives the appropriate threats of make her happy or else. Every best friend's duty, but more threatening here by way of said best friend knowing how to use a sword.

I don’t trust her to think about herself at the moment. Which means that you’re going to have to do it for her.’

I can't wait to see how Leo approaches the situation and takes this advice. I'm rooting for you so hard my dude.

[thegreenleavesofspring]

Captain Collins was not a talker by nature, and with practice, he had learned how to turn this to his advantage: if he didn't say anything for long enough, people either assumed he was stupid or forgot he was there and so didn't watch their words.

Oh look, is me.

[inkwell-god]

this may be a romantasy, but I'm more interested in the IT subplot

[loopiesounds]

" You are allowed to have feelings, Rosamund," said Caroline.

Rosamond closed her eyes, fighting to retain the detachment. "Yes. They're just not helpful right now"

[spaceroadtrip]

Just got my copy of Just stab me now by Jill Bearup and I'm torturing myself because I really want to read the entire thing right now but I also want to save it for the five hours I'll be spending on the train on Tuesday because I'll need a good book for that. But the book is sitting right next to me...staring at me. I'm going to have to hide it somewhere so I don't break down and devour it tonight