#Joshua Bassett imagine

[fubureaders]

he was a nerd, she did ballet, what more can i say? | joshua bassett au imagine

summary: it's a university AU in nyc, cuz what better place is there for a rom-com moment? lucky for you there's a really cute guy standing up at the podium in the latest student government meeting... who seems to like learning more about pirouettes and lifts. or maybe he just likes the way you look in pink. 🩰🩰🩰

wc: 1.7k

note: happy belated golden (22nd) birthday joshua!!

masterlist

it's your second year of university, and your dance classes are getting more intense than what you've ever done before... and you're loving every minute, even if your feet are killing you. but you're studying your passion in the most beautiful city in the world. even if new york was recently named the most expensive in the world... your grandma's got a rent controlled apartment in harlem that has in unit laundry, a dishwasher, and rooms for both you and your childhood friend to sleep in. plus central air. there's no way in hell you're ever passing it up, regardless of whether or not your downstairs neighbors hate it when you stay up late practicing.

for their luck though, your friend and now roommate is looking to work in diplomacy and international relations, after having seen that queen amelia mignonette thermopolis renaldi of genovia went to the woodrow wilson school in princess diaries 2: royal engagement. she said, and these were her exact words, "it's either i become mia thermopolis and marry a chris pine type, or become an elle woods type and marry a luke-wilson-as-emmett-forest type." she's a sweetheart though, and you both have a love for pink. so when she has these movie-based ambitions, you go with it because this girl will probably end up taking over the political world while you're taking over the dance world.

so anyway, because this girl's plotting pink-filled world domination, she's been getting her start in the university student government, and she's doing a great job. she lost the election for sophomore class president, but she says the guy who won is really nice and working with him as sophomore vice president hasn't made her sick yet, which is high praise from her so you're not entirely annoyed at the idea of attending the next meeting with her. besides, you've been meaning to branch out more and make friends who aren't in the dance program, because let's be real... most of the girls taking ballet are thin, white, wealthy and it can be difficult to have a variety of discussions with them, no matter how much you love talking about the professors with them. hopefully there are a couple more people of color (besides you and your friend) that you can talk to, and befriend.

after a long train ride down to campus and grabbing some food at one of the trucks outside from your favorite vendor who always serves you extra for the same price, you and your friend head inside and rush to catch the elevator. thankfully, a (really cute) guy holds the elevator open for you both, and as the doors close your friend seems to recognize him and so she begins talking to him about some school issue being brought up in tonight's event. while you're looking at your email to check if any professors are suddenly assigning work due at 11:59, you feel the guy's curious and intrigued eyes glancing towards you. in such a short elevator ride, you've never felt so flattered.

so when the cute elevator guy asks for your name, you can't help but feel sad when the elevator doors choose that exact moment to open up. of course the cute elevator continues to be a gentleman and once more holds the doors open for you and your friend, so you tell him your name in a quiet tone as you walk past. not accounting for the chatter going on, you don't realize that he couldn't hear your reply.

the room begins to quiet down as your friend makes her way to the front of the room, so you quickly find a seat near the wall and set your bag to rest on your chair. and as you look up to focus on the meeting that your friend was so excited about, you're happy to see some members of the black student union, and make a mental note to talk to some of them after the meeting. but then your eyes focus on the podium at the front of the room, and are surprised to see "cute elevator guy" standing there, talking about starting off the student government meeting as sophomore class president. so this is the guy who won. does it make you a bad friend to say you would've voted for him too, based on that smile alone? wow, you could get used to these meetings -- and now you feel put on the spot, because all of a sudden he's making eye contact with you.

he's making eye contact with those glittering brown eyes of his (how in the hell are they glittering, bro? that's some magic right there)... and he's talking all pretty and passionate about mental health initiatives he wants to propose for students. and wouldn't you know it, not only is the guy cute but he seems to know what he's talking about. he's got a whole slideshow talking about mental health issues that students are facing, unprecedented issues that this university and many others have never faced before, and how he plans to aid students through his term. he's talking animatedly with his hands, talking about some of his own experiences, and even talking about how he knows that he can't speak on how it impacts each individual because he recognizes his privilege. you're finally understanding why vulnerability and honesty can be so damn attractive in a man.

he then brings up a group of students with whom he's been working on a plan to present to the university, and this group is comprised of majority students of color and those with disabilities. it's a necessary meeting, and you even see some people from the school paper writing down their responses, giving these students a platform to discuss what mental health means to them at a PWI. it's beautiful, and you feel grateful that your friend pushed you to come out tonight.

so when the meeting ends, you're a little sad because the discussion was getting good. only reason why it ended was because "cute elevator guy," or as you've now found out it's joshua, ordered pizzas for everybody. the man is considerate, kind, intellectual, and has money to buy all that pizza for a bunch of broke & hungry college kids? yeah, he's definitely got your vote in more ways than one.

you and your friend regroup, and are talking with some of the students from before about classes and fun things around the city, when you get that same feeling from the elevator that the class president is still checking you out. you feel your cheeks warm, and you start to play with your jewellery, getting your friend's attention as they know it's a telltale sign of you being nervous.

"what's up? you've been weird since the elevator... with josh... ooooh, you finally have a crush!" they exclaim, and you give them your best 'i will cut you if you raise your voice by one more decibel' stare. they grin mischievously as they glance over to joshua, who was looking at you until getting caught by your friend, causing him to blush and go on his phone as a distraction from you. as your friend turns back, you begin to explain to them, "listen, i would totally approach him because, i mean... look at him," you say as they nod along in understanding, "but i'm just so tired of always having to approach guys. especially at this school, not one of them has ever approached me first, i'm always starting the conversation. so if mr. president wants to talk to me, he can talk and i will gladly listen."

you had hoped that was the last of it, and for a minute there it truly seemed like your friend had just let the whole thing go, left it in the past and moved on. until they so innocently said they were throwing away trash, took your plate along with theirs, and quickly walked over to joshua. the other students you've been talking with see this go down and try not to laugh, otherwise they'd give it all away. but you turn around anyway, to find yourself being pointed at by your friend, who's looking all too happy while talking with the lanky student advocate... who's now holding eye contact with you once again. you try to play it off cool, hoping you weren't outwardly drooling and praying your melanin is enough to hide your blushing.

then, a hand gently touches your arm. that same hand that was waving around animatedly while the cute elevator guy was talking at the podium, with the amateur black-polished manicure and a couple rings in addition. your friend reappears on your other side, still wearing that mischievous grin and watching you over the brim of their cup. you turn, and lo and behold, there's mr president now, smiling at you again like he wants you to have a crush on him.

author's note: finishing this off with bullet points, will probably come back to this and rewrite the whole thing so it's fully fleshed out

you guys talk, and people are trying to talk to him about more campus issues, but he's asking you about your favorite restaurants and ballet-related memories

you mention your favorite pizza shop to him, and your friend just so happens to have an exam early tomorrow morning (you're so buying them coffee as a thank you for saying that)

so you take him to your favorite place, while you talk about seeing performances of the dance theatre of harlem and the american ballet theatre growing up, and being too scared to audition for the production with solange's music attached being put on recently

he talks about wanting to go into advocacy for the queer community and in general those who deal with mental health issues (maybe you mentally think "great another broken white boy" like black panther... maybe you even say it, and he actually gets the joke/reference?? either way it's a funny thought and a fun time)

anyway at some point, your friend texts you asking how your "date with mr president" is going, but you don't even notice your phone buzz, because you're just talking about everything with each other. after a little while he sees how few people are left in the restaurant, and you guys see how much time passed. so he pays and walks you home, giving you guys the chance to talk more, and you're loving every minute of it

you get to the doorway of your apartment, and tell him that next time he can show you his favorite music shops around the city that he'd mentioned, and you'll even let him talk your ear off more about advocacy. he laughs, and ends up successfully getting your number

the next day, you wake up and see that he sent a message telling you how much he had last night. you guys end up talking as you make your way to class, but you're not paying too much attention to your professor. only because as you were walking into the room, he sent you a text asking you out for a real date

bonus: real date where he takes you to see the solange ballet, and once you guys get outside by the lincoln center fountain, he tries to recreate some of the moves with you. then you guys go back to the pizza place and talk some more

okay so i don't know how to end these but i hope you like it, and that it makes sense. sorry i couldn't fully finish it out, it's currently 4 am (merry christmas eve by the way, and happy holidays otherwise). but i really liked this idea, and i hope you do too. happy belated birthday joshua (if he ever sees this i want him to say in an interview what his thoughts are on solange)

ok love you bye, happy holidays, drink some water, get some rest (very hypocritical i know)

[lisacameron99]

who i will write for

requests open

btw: i do and will write smut if requested

criminal minds

spencer reid

aaron hotchner

luke alvez

bridgerton

colin bridgerton

anthoney bridgerton

benedict bridgerton (depending on the request)

mcu (all characters over 18)

peter parker (tom holland and andrew garfield)

bucky barnes

steve rogers

thor

one tree hill

lucas scott

nathan scott

q

outer banks (all characters over 18)

jj maybank

john b routledge

rafe cameron\

topper thorton

supernatural

dean winchester

sam winchester

john winchester

pretty little liars (all characters over 18)

jason dilaurentis

mike montgomery

noel kahn

caleb rivers

shameless (all characters over 18)

lip gallagher

harry potter (all characters over 18)

draco malfoy (post order of the pheonix)

remus lupin (post hogwarts)

sirius black (post hogwarts)

james potter (post hogwarts / no lily)

fred weasley (post hogwarts)

station 19

jack gibson

grey's anatomy

andrew deluca

mark sloan

alex karev

lucas adams

amelia shepherd

random celebrities (all characters over 18)

harry styles

shawn mendes

niall horan

joshua bassett

andrew garfield

[crushculture03]

hey everyone! i hope you’ve enjoyed my imagines so far! i love writing them so much! i wanted to say i’m taking requests for one-shots/imagines ! i’m not sure how to use the ask feature on here so i made a google form which i’ll link in this post! or if you want you can comment on this post a request or dm me! thank you again for reading my work it means the world to me!

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdYCVuWazFm_fCFYL7TqKEkvDFOj93OW8vWKbh-ttsqHSU6rg/viewform?usp=sf_link

[writingsfromhome]

The Golden Years

A/N: really liked this song the first time I heard it and decided to write something based off of it!!

——————————————

5 years ago:

The halls were noisy with the rush of the bell; the day had ended and everyone was eager to get home on the spring Friday. I sit in the music room with my guitar, strumming softly trying to get the tune out of my head.

The music room had the familiar woody smell, I never really knew if that was from the furnishing or all the instruments but I never got tired of it.

The only other people here are Thomas who’s napping after skipping his last class and the music teacher who’s setting up the class for next week’s lesson. He liked me and by extension allowed me to linger in his class after school. And sometimes let my mates stay hidden from hall monitors.

I wave goodbye to him as he finishes up, wishing him a good weekend. He just misses y/n walking in.

Y/n y/l/n. She moved down the road from me a couple years ago and she was always fascinating to me. She’d made friends her first few months here and stuck with them—those same friends hated my friends for various reasons but they always gave me an excuse to interact with her albeit in an annoying way.

Y/n was known to win out the lead for any play our school has put on. She had an infectious energy and I’d spent every moment she caught my eye gazing at her—not that I’d admit it if anyone ever asked.

She spots me and smiles, I remember to smile back at the last minute, shocked that she was acknowledging me with one. We hadn’t been nice to each other in a while; the circles we ran in loved to hate each other.

“Hey Harry,” she walks up to a nearby desk and perches there. “Whatcha working on today?”

I try to compose myself, “hey. Y/n. Uh I’m just trying something out. Something new.”

“Can I hear it?” She asks, her eyes alight with a genuine interest. It catches me off guard again.

“Really?”

“Yeah! I asked didn’t I?!”

“It’s really rough.”

“That’s okay,” she shrugs. She makes herself more comfortable.

“Really rough I-“

“Please?”

With a bat of her eyes I’m putty. I take in a deep breath—here goes nothing. Or if anything this would just be one more thing her friends could make fun of me for. Maybe that’s why she was here.

I strum her what I’d been working on for the last hour and hum along. She listens intently, her expression shifting and opening up as the chords change. Being me and nervous, I end it on the wrong note and nearly poke my eye out with the neck, making an awkward save as I set it down on my lap.

She sits quietly after the production, back straight and gazing out the window with a relaxed smile.

“I know you said that’s rough but that was amazing.” She says to me. “You’re actually bloody talented Harry.”

“Aw uhm well thanks,” I mumble. My cheeks feel on fire. I rarely played for people like this. If they were around while I worked on pieces that was alright but I’ve never had an audience of one.

“No really! You have a gift how long you working on?”

“The day.”

“The day!” She shouts and her enthusiasm makes me laugh. I don’t know why she was being so nice to me but it fills me with a buzzing joy. “You have such a way with your music like each strum is a new part of a story. It’s good! I can imagine it in a movie.”

I blush harder, “Thanks I um…I really enjoy it. Sometimes it’s easier to express myself with this than with…with like a conversation?”

She nods in understanding, “Y’know you should share your music. Start a channel or something online and post stuff! Like covers—people love covers-“

“I don’t really like to sing.”

“But I bet you’re good at it too?”

“Uhm nah I’m-“

“Don’t get shy on me now!” She nudges me and I swear I feel it linger even after she moves her hand away. “You’re such a tough jerk in the halls when you’re picking on my friends don’t go soft now.”

I laugh until I’m doubled over, part overjoyed and part embarassed because it was true. I don’t know why I was suddenly being shy.

“I’ve got to warm up my vocal cords,” I touch my throat once I’m done laughing. She grins. “I can’t sing right now.”

“I’ll hear it one day. I’m holding you to it.” She points a finger at me. “You should be performing this stuff.”

The idea of performing outside the walls of the music room felt both exciting and daunting. But the earnestness in y/n’s eyes give me a sense of courage.

"Maybe," I shrug. "I've never really thought about it.”

"Well, maybe it's time you did," she suggests gently. "Don't let your talents stay hidden."

“Yeah,” I smile. “Makes sense coming from you.”

“What’s that mean?” She raises a brow.

“Our year wouldn’t be blessed with all your productions, you’ve got natural talent too.”

“Yeah well,” now it’s her time to blush. “I really enjoy it.”

“I know.” I say. She catches my eye and a tender fondness passes between us.

“Anyway, I promised Clara I would braid her hair before her football match so I’ve got to go. But…it was nice talking Harry.”

I watch her go and I can’t wipe the dopey smile off my face the rest of the weekend.

5 years later:

I didn’t think I would see her here. After all, she lived across the pond these days and had rsvp’d as a maybe.

But there she stands with the same group of friends that surrounded her even back then. They’re all a little older, grown into people their secondary selves could only imagine becoming. But even now, they’re faceless next to her; she commands all my attention.

She looks stunning in a simple blue bridesmaid dress and her hair grown down in waves. The wind lifts her hair and she looks as majestic as the first day my eyes landed on her. As radiant as every day I’d been with her afterwards. She was golden sunshine and every minute I got to spend with her had been golden too.

Four years since I last saw her. Those four years had gone by in the blink of an eye; it had been fun ‘til it hurt.

I feel a surge of emotions—longing, regret, and the tiniest speck of hope. They compete for dominance as I indulge studying her for a moment longer and just as I look away her head lifts, catching my gaze for the briefest second.

My heart races.

I turn and wander to where my mates pass a football around. Just like we used to. Some things never changed.

Some things did.

“You see her yet?” Thomas asks.

“D’you not see the look in his eye?” Abe, his twin brother, asks.

“Yeah I saw her,” I interrupt before they wheedle me for how I looked. I could imagine it, the regret and sorrow etched into my face. “It’s been four years I’ve already told you lot I’m over it.”

My friends glance at each other.

“I am.” I insist.

“The lady doth protest—ow!” Ramo rubs his chest where I’d tossed the football.

“Where’d this even come from?” I nod to the football.

They shrug, “Some kid had it. We stole it from him.”

I sigh and look around the space. One of our best mates from secondary was getting married to Hailey, one of Y/N’s mates. That’s why half of our class was here a short walk from where we all went to school.

The reception should have started a half hour ago but the couple were stuck in traffic. Apparently. So all the guests have been entertaining ourselves and that meant stealing footballs from children.

“What happened to that lady you were supposed to bring along?” Abe asks.

“Lady?” I ask.

“Yeah wasn’t she a few years older than you?”

I repress the urge to sigh, the same as when we were school boys these friends never stopped teasing each other. Of course I also did my fair share but the trick was to never let them know it cut too deep.

“We ended things a while ago,” I say as if it doesn’t poke at an old wound to say.

A while ago was two weeks ago when she found out my ex would be at the wedding and I had sent a text to the best man clarifying if she would be there. She had seen the message and gone batshit, talking about trust and about being emotionally closed off. It was hours of arguing into the night before she’d left home. We’d broken up the next day.

The old wound was feeling like I was never going to find love like I did with her. With Y/N. Every relationship I’d had since crashed and burned worse than a Nascar vehicle with faulty mechanics.

If I would've known those were the golden years, I would have done things so differently.

But for the last two weeks instead of pathetically staring at pictures with my ex and wondering if I should call her to make up, I was pathetically looking at the polaroids of Y/N and I that I kept in an old box. I wondered what happened to the ones she had, if they had gone up in flames or if they lived in a shoebox under her bed.

My attention’s snagged by the boys elbowing each other and glancing at me and then behind me. I turn just in time for y/n and a couple of her friends to walk up to us.

I try to play it cool but I don’t know how I look; probably like a deer in headlights, and y/n is the bright stark headlights.

But her eyes slide off of me and onto the group and it feels like I’ve become the deer after the headlights have blinked out of sight.

“If it isn’t the poor four,” one of y/n’s friend uses our nickname from school. “And who’s this?”

“Dinis,” Dinis puts the football down and extends his hand to Clara. We watch them flirt.

“Didn’t you know Dinis in college?” Abe asks.

“Clara moved away in college,” y/n says smiling at the interaction happening in front of us. “Obviously she hasn’t felt the Dinis-effect yet.”

Her friend and her laugh.

“Oi Y/N haven’t seen you in a minute how’s the Angel City?” Ramo asks.

“You mean the city of angels?” Y/n raises a brow and the group laughs again. I’m too mesmerized watching her talk, seeing her alive and in person in front of me to catch the joke in time so I smile along with the group. “It’s cool, always something to do. But I don’t actually live there anymore I moved out of the city last year. Get some breathing room.”

My heart skips a beat. “I heard the city’s as rammed as ours.”

I anticipate her attention, us locking eyes, something passing between. When our eyes do meet I feel a rush of familiarity and uncertainty.

And she simply glances like I’m just another bloke to her, nods, and the looks back at the group. “Yeah sometimes even worse if you can believe.”

Someone else asks another question but my head is filled with a loud buzz. Reality feels like it crushes me down as easy as an aluminum can; I was spared a glance. She spared me a glance. That’s all I was to her?

“Where d’you think the newlyweds are?” Clara asks.

“Traffic,” Abe rolls his eyes.

“Think fast,” Thomas suddenly shouts and the football is whizzing past me towards Clara. We watch in horror as it hits her with a thwack in the chest.

“What the fuck Thomas!” Clara holds her hands out as she stares at the dirt staining her blue dress. “What the-“

“That’ll come off,” Clara’s friends assure her. “It’s not mud don’t-“

“Here,” suddenly Denis is beside her and holding out his hand. “I’ll help you clean it off.”

“What the hell mate?” I look at Thomas. He’s flushed and looking scared. I’m too busy looking at him to notice Clara’s pitched the ball back at him and it hits him in the side of the head, knocking some sense back into him.

“Nice one.” Someone mutters.

“I’m sorry!” He finally finds his voice as Clara walks away with Dinis.

“You’ve got shite all over your hair,” Abe points out to his brother.

“I’m outta here before I’m next,” y/n’s other friends starts to back away to the group they were in previously.

“Where?!” Thomas starts rubbing it off which only spreads it further into gelled hair.

“Let’s go,” Abe hauls his brother away with an arm locked around his neck, tussling the dirt in his hair as they go.

“So…” Ramo looks between y/n and me, scratching the back of his head. “That was crazy. I should return this ball to…”

He trails off, walking away from the two of us. Which wouldn’t have been as awkward except he just left a cloud of awkward in his stead.

“Y/N,” I say softly like I was approaching a feral pup.

“Harry,” she replies, her tone polite yet distant, a subtle barrier between us.

“I don’t think they’ve changed much,” I act like I wasn’t aware of everything unspoken.

She smiles politely. “Nope. Just as boyish as the day we all met.”

“That wasn’t our proudest moment-“

“Yeah you boys thought you could beat us girls at British bulldog.”

“Little did we know,” I shake my head. We’d been badly beaten and battered by the girls’ team. We didn’t take to losing very well back then.

“If only we knew then what we know now.”

I look over at y/n; it felt like she was saying one thing but meant something else. Something that sounded close to reminiscing about us.

But with how she was acting it made me feel like I’d made us up. Was it never that serious for her?

“Wouldn’t have fucked up so much?” I ask.

“Yeah something like that,” her lips tip into a half smile. She still hasn’t looked me in the eye for more than a second. I missed those eyes. I missed the way they used to look at me.

“How’s the acting?” I ask. I wait for her to look at me, acknowledge me more than she did. Wait to see if alone together there would be more meaning in the looks we exchange but she stays facing forward.

“It’s slow right now. I haven’t been booking much this season which is why I was able to make it to this.”

“Sorry to hear that,” look at me I want to say instead.

She shrugs. “It happens. Slow seasons then you find yourself booked back to back and burnt out. Nature of the biz as they say.”

“Very LA.”

We go quiet and I feel my heart explode at the distance she was keeping; I can sense her guardedness.

"I've missed you," I confess quietly, unable to hold back the truth any longer. "I think about you often."

Her gaze softens, a fleeting vulnerability crossing her features before it hardens into something stonier.

"It’s been four years," she notes in an even voice. “Surely you’ve moved on Harry. Don’t try to flatter me now.”

I don’t think I had moved on, I think with a sinking heart. I hoped tonight would be a night of reconnecting and exploring if there was anything left of us in the future. But it seemed that y/n had made up her mind about what her future was going to be long before this.

“Oh look Clara’s back,” she spots her friend walking back towards us. Dinis is nowhere in sight but she’s splotchy and windswept.

“I’m going to literally kill that prick. I’ve got a wet spot on my front like I’m still bloody breastfeeding or something.”

“It’ll dry up,” y/n pats her friend’s dress. “It’s sunny out don’t worry.”

“It better by the time we do photos.”

It’s like I’m not even there. They continue talking and slowly turn to walk back to their other friends.

“Nice talk,” I call out.

Clara’s still too busy ranting but y/n glances at me. Her smile is a reflex as she waves, unengaged and apathetic.

I feel a jab in my chest, I don’t know what to think. The last four years I’ve been so afraid I’d let go of the best thing. That I’d never find a love like hers. Meanwhile she’s moved on so much that I wasn’t even an ex any longer. I was just someone she knew in grade school. That hurts. It feels like lava dripping over my chest.

“Y’alright?” Ramo reappears at my side. He looks genuinely concerned.

“Yeah!” I put on a smile I don’t even feel. “Just wondering when this party’s getting bloody started.”

I feel Ramo’s eyes on me as I walk towards another drink but he doesn’t say anything more.

***

I sit with my arm around Y/n and her head rests on my shoulder. Sometimes the quiet moments we existed in beat out the others. They fed my heart and heightened every sense of mine.

“I wrote something,” I whisper into her hair. She turns her head to look up at me and I gently pull away. “A song…for you.”

“For me?” Y/n’s eyes are alight with shock and something else. “You wrote a song for me?”

My heart pounds as I confirm with a nod. “I’m halfway done but I wanted you to hear it.”

“Well go on,” she sits up and angles herself towards me. “I want to hear it!”

I pull my guitar case closer to me and open the familiar snaps, pulling the instrument out and close to me with shaky hands. Y/N watches with an excited attentiveness.

I began the melody that started as a few chords in my head the first time Y/N and I kissed under this tree and has continued to build for the 4 weeks since. This tree felt like it witnessed so much of the 5 weeks we’ve officially been together and I wanted to write an ode to it as much as y/n.

I couldn’t believe it was only 5 weeks but after a summer and a whole semester of flirting and hanging out I’d finally asked her out at the end of January. It was now March and Y/n had gotten her acceptance letter from across the ocean. She had told me last week with nervous hands and I wanted her to know we would always have this thing between us no matter what decision she made.

Y/n smiles as I begin but her eyes grow misty as I finish my final lines I had so far.

"And under the cherry tree, where love and laughter will always be," I sing softly, my voice cracking with emotion. "I'll cherish all these memories, even when you're not beside me."

“Oh Har,” she tips forward and I catch her against my chest, her head buried in my neck. “I can’t imagine living so far from you. Leaving you and everyone behind.”

“It’s the adventure you’ve been waiting for,” I reassure her. “You’re gonna make it big.”

“I don’t know if it’s worth it,” she whispers.

I pry her away gentle so she can look me in the face. I want to selfishly tell her to stay and never leave me. But even more than that I want her to do what she has always been passionate about, what she loves to do.

Love.

I love her, I realize with a clarity that cut so deep it tumbles out of my mouth.

“I love you,” I say. She freezes in my arms and I fumble to continue. “And I want you to live the life you always imagined. You’re destined for amazing things y/n I know it. I’ll always be here.”

“Will you?”

“Of course,” I kiss her on her temple and ignore that she didn’t say it back. That I said it too soon damnit we’d only been dating a month. What was wrong with me?

“I think you need to share your talent with the world,” she reminds me.

“That’s why I joined the talent show with you.” It was y/n’s idea, a final hurrah before we graduate and to prove to myself that I could get over my performance anxiety.

“We’re gonna crush it.”

I nod, the lump in my throat grows too big for words. She seems to sense it like she always does and pulls me into her this time.

It would take her a week to whisper the three words back to me, in the darkened corner of a house party right before she leads me home. It was a long week but so worth it.

***

The next time I catch y/n alone is when I’m talking to Hailey who’s thanking me for the few words I gave for her now husband Michael. The husband in question was doing the Macarena and Hailey was the sort to never be caught dead doing that sort of thing.

That’s why the couple never made sense to either group of friends. Yet they were the ones with a ring on their finger this many years later.

“Hailey oh-“ y/n is tipsy, I can tell with the sheen to her eye and the permanent half-smile etched into her lips. “Sorry didn’t realize-“

“That’s alright!” Hailey wraps her arm around y/n. “This girl is the best. She literally hopped on a last minute flight to be here! Can you believe that? I was crushed when she said maybe but ugh she always swoops in last minute saves the day. That’s always been her, back in the day during one of our school dances right, I got caught with…”

Y/n and I lock eyes as the bride babbles on and there. Finally there. The passing look of two people who know what the other is thinking without a single word.

She seems to catch herself and after an intense few seconds and a small smile she composes her face into an unengaged one and jostles Hailey.

“Hailey Harry doesn’t care! I just wanted to get a photo with you and Mik-“

“He’s too bloody busy doing cringe dances-“

“He’s actually having a drink looking for you now but look at this.”

“What?” Hailey’s head swivels around the room as y/n presents her phone with the groom doing a very serious macarena.

“And they say gen z get all the cringe dances,” I comment. Y/n snorts and then covers her mouth, her laugh falling away into a composed expression.

“You know you don’t have to do that,” I say before I can think. A part of me was getting desperate and a little irritated and another felt heartbroken all over again.

“Do what?” She asks as Hailey prances away from us when she spots Michael.

“Be all serious and composed around me. If I’m funny just laugh. My ego could use a lift.”

She stares with a tight lip and cautious eyes.

“You used to laugh the most at my jokes,” I say a bit softer. “Made me feel like the funniest bloke in the room.”

Her eyes lose a bit of their edge but her mouth is still hard-set and a wrinkle forms between her brows. That was new.

“I-I’ve gotta go.” She says. “Gotta get the picture.”

“Right,” I shove my hands in my pockets and watch her go back to the married couple. Right before she reaches them she turns slightly. When she finds me still watching, she jerks back around.

Hope siphons into my chest.

***

“This is the best song!” Abe shouts in my ear as he and the remaining wedding guests belt out Sweet Caroline.

It was late into the wedding party. Much of the older invitees had gone home and kids with their footballs were probably tucked into bed. What remained were Hailey and Michael’s school friends and a few stragglers that were too drunk to want to go home.

“Final song,” the DJ announces. “Time of my Life.”

All night I had been stealing glances at y/n waiting to see if she would come to me. Reciprocate even an ounce of anything I felt. But she hadn’t. She’d gone out of her way to avoid me even when we’d bumped into each other outside the toilets. She’d simply brushed past with a mumble of something I couldn’t make out.

I think what I said to her made her angrier. The anger, and the cold shoulder was new. It makes me feel small.

But I’d had enough drinks by now to feel confident. Enough to walk to where she dances with some friends.

“Y/n.”

She startles and plays it off with a laugh. “What d’you want?”

I motion my head to the side. To talk.

Hesitation makes her eyes weary but she follows after a moment.

Everyone around us sings along to the song. The irony isn’t lost on me.

“What?” She asks.

I stare at her openly, she allows me as she searches my face herself. I grasp at something to start this off with but I’ve had a few drinks myself.

“I used to think you were completely out of my league,” what comes out is a random thought in the speech I’d built up in my head throughout the night.

Her nose wrinkles, “what are you on about Harry?”

“Don’t do that,” I clutch my shirt. “Don’t act like we’re strangers, like we didn’t have something together.”

Her smile falls away, “we had something…like four five years ago. That’s…that’s ages ago Harry. Tell me you’re not still hung up on it?”

Her voice cuts right through me but it’s her gaze that doesn’t quite look at me that gives her away.

“Look me in the eye and tell me I mean nothing to you now,” I cut through the bullshit. It might have been the realization that I’d stayed hung up on this woman for years, sabotaged my love life on the idea I’d find nothing like what we had. And she stood here in front of me now undermining what we had. Making me feel crazy.

She looks me in the eyes, the eyes that haunted me in my dreams.

“I…it was a long time ago Harry.”

“Then why’ve you been avoiding me all night?”

“I haven’t. We’re talking now?”

“So I’m nothing to you?” I ask, hearing the hurt and wishing I didn’t sound so desperate.

“Look. We were young and free and what we had back then doesn’t actually translate to much when you look back as adults.”

“Is that what you tell yourself? So you can freeze away your feelings for what we had?”

She gapes, then turns away with her arms wrapped around herself like the freezing caught up.

“I don’t know what you want.” She finally says.

“I just…” what did I want? “I want to know if you ever think about us. If you have any regrets…if…”

She sighs, “Of course you cross my mind from time to time. But I wouldn’t have regrets. I can see why someone would have regrets, however, after they just let someone they called the love of their life go. Especially when she needed him the most.”

There it was. Her hot anger.

“When you needed…”

“Yeah!” She barely glances at me. “I was scared of leaving and losing you and being alone and all the unknown things. And you left me. You just…said goodbye to us.”

Woah.

Her eyes prick with tears and she turns back to the dancing crowd. The song was winding down and the venue being cleared. I feel the opportunity pass through my fingers.

If I would have known, I would have held her longer. I would never have left her alone. Especially when she needed me the most.

“Y/n,” in a desperate move I grab for her arm and turn her back around. Her lashes are lined with tears, her mouth open in an “o” as she looks up at me. My eyes can’t help themselves as they flicker down to them. This was the closest I came to holding her like before. Her eyes do the same and I feel my heart racing in my chest.

“I’m sorry,” I croak. “For what it’s worth.”

“It’s not worth much,” she says through a watery smile. Trying not to cry; trying to stay composed.

“I’m still in l-“

“Stop,” she puts her hand on top of mind and gently nudges it off her arm. She shakes her head and her hair falls gently to cover her face. “I can’t do this right now Harry. I travelled all this way to celebrate our best friends. But the distance between us was for a reason.”

“It’s been years-“

“Doesn’t change how you left me after I gave you my whole heart. Or the fact that that we ended.”

“I truly an sorry,” I say to her retreating figure.

The shame I feel courses through my body; I couldn’t have known better back then. I was young and stupid and I didn’t realize these types of decisions weren’t to be made lightly. That their repercussions would echo for the rest of my life.

I left her under the cherry tree in the courtyard of the school we’d graduated from. It was late June and it haunted my memories since.

—

Under the skyward branches of the blushing cherry tree, a solemn silence hung in the air. It was the last day of our final year, and emotions swirled between us like the spring breeze.

Y/N stood with her back against the tree trunk, her yearbook clasped tightly to her chest, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over. I stood before her, my hands nervously clenched in my pockets, heart heavy with the weight of impending decision.

"I can't believe it's over," y/n murmured, her voice cracking with emotion as she meets my eyes. "Four years went by so fast."

I nod, unable to maintain eye contact. It wasn’t school ending that was making us this sad but what would come of us as I would attend school in the country and y/n out.

This decision weighed heavily on my mind ever since I learned y/n was attending ucla across the ocean—a decision she had made long before we acknowledged our feelings for each other. Now facing the idea of long-distance, I couldn’t shake the fear that everything was changing and things would be different in an unknowable way.

"Yeah," I manage to reply. My voice comes out hoarse, my throat tight with tears I was pushing down. “I'm going to miss this... miss us I…”

Her lower lip trembles, emotions ripple across her features. “Harry god I’m gonna miss us, you…just getting to be together everyday!”

I scrub at my eyes, not wanting to cry right now. She notices and wipes them for me. “You've been my rock through everything this last year."

I take a step towards her, closer. She was the sun and I wanted to bask in her glow, always. Except today wasn’t a bright day, my heart breaks at the sight of the tears streaking her cheeks. “Y/N I…” I try to find the right words but they fail me again. In the meantime a hundred chords play through my mind, deepening the grief I felt.

Suddenly a surge of panic grips me, my blood turns cold like it usually did when I thought about her leaving me. When I consider the depth of what this meant.

Deep down I couldn’t bear the thought of losing y/n but at the same time the unknown was playing at my fears, my anxiety. Imagine a future where she’s thousands of miles away. Everyone I know who talks about long-distance always gets their heart broken…distance never makes relationships stronger.

What if, I think, what if I just rip the bandaid off.

Wouldn’t that be the merciful thing to do? Instead of continuing to a point of no return. I mean what if we try long-distance, y/n creates a life in America, and realizes I was holding her back? What if we end up hating each other?

My brow feels slick and my heart pounds away. I clear my throat.

“I love you y/n.” I tuck her hair behind her ear.

“I love you too,” she whispers.

“After this summer, after you leave-“

“We don’t have to talk about this right now let’s just enjoy now and-“

“How can we?” I finally break. “How can we enjoy now when we know there’s an expiry date to all this!”

“Harry,” y/n grabs my hands. Attempts to soothe my anxiety but I’d passed the point of no return. The words continue to tumble out.

“What if…maybe it’s for the best if we…if we let go now.”

“What?” Shock colours y/n’s face and her eyes fill with tears. “What are you saying Har?”

“I don't want us to... to hurt each other trying to make this work.”

Her mouth hangs open and I can see her heart breaking in front of me. It kills me inside.

“But Har,” her voice grows desperate. “We talked about…we could…we’ll make it work-“

“Y/n,” now my own grows desperate. I wanted to stop talking about this, now that I’d made the decision to let go I wanted to just cut this loose and run away. “We’ll only hurt more.”

Her lower lip trembles and tears coat her bottom lash as she looks up at me through her top lashes. She whispers, “This isn’t fair.”

“I know,” I hang my head. “I’m sorry.”

And I was. I didn’t want to be the one to break us up but what choice did I have? I was doing it as the best case scenario.

Tears spill down y/n’s face and her voice is barely audible over the rustling of the cherry tree, “b-but I love you.”

I close my eyes for a brief moment, the sway of the leaves now roaring in my ears. Or maybe that was just the blood rushing to my face. I feel my heart turn to dust and my entire body aches as the weight of the decision coats me. “I love you too y/n. I love you now and always.”

I clasp her hand and squeeze it. She squeezes back, a sob pulled forth by the contact.

“Y/n…maybe this is how we say goodbye. On our own terms. With space to…to heal.”

Y/n cries harder and I pull her in, tucking her into me because she fit so perfectly in my contours. A part of me couldn’t believe I was doing this, I always imagined our goodbye at a Heathrow terminal under bright lights and linoleum floors.

We both cry into each other but I pull away first, I had to be the stronger one.

“I wish you nothing but the best,” I cup her face. “I…”

I didn’t know how to translate the dust of my heart. I kiss her one last time and then again on her forehead.

With that, I turn away unable to stand in the heartbreak. Every step away from her and the cherry tree feels impossible but I walk away from the girl who was my everything, feeling torn between the love I had for her and the fear of what the future would bring.

—

All I’d been thinking about was myself. About how I’d had friends who tried long distance and how their ending was more brutal than ripping the bandaid off from the get go.

That summer we avoided each other at parties, at our local haunts, and on the day she left I watched her car pull away from my bedroom window and leave forever with a leaden feeling in my heart. That I’d made a big mistake, too big to ever fix.

Tonight was the night I was supposed to set thing right. But things were just getting worse.

***

“After party!” Abe wraps his drunken arm around my shoulder. By then I’d sobered up with a quiet moment off to the side, smoking even though I’d tried to quit ten times in the last month. “I thought you quit that you cheeky bugger!”

“I’m going to,” I squish the cigarette against the wall. “You said after party?”

“After party!!” Ramo hollers coming up from behind. I take in the scene before me, the string lights were having their power cut, most of the tables were wiped clear of cutlery and tablecloths. Just like that the magical night Hailey and Micheal had been planning for months was over. Now they had their whole lives in front of them.

“Har?” Someone snaps a finger in front of my face.

“Huh?”

“Where’d you go?” A group had gathered in front of me, a mix of groomsmen and bridesmaid. Y/n isn’t one of them.

“What?” I ask again. “What’s this about an after party?”

“The party isn’t done,” someone replies.

“Please?!” I hear someone else say off to the side. Now that the music had also turned off it had gotten quieter in the venue.

I turn to the other conversation and see Hailey tugging y/n’s arms, trying to convince her of something. And just like that y/n’s eyes meet mine and something like resignation passes through them.

“-you in?” Michael claps my back and I’m jolted back to the crowd in front of me.

“Yeah,” I assumed they asked me about this after party. “Let’s keep the party going!”

Whooping ensures and everyone trickles out into the parking lot.

“Where is this again?” I ask whoever was closest to me.

“Schoolyard?” Clara answers. “If we don’t get kicked out for loitering that is.”

“We’ll just have to be quiet.”

Clara side eyes me and realizes I’m joking. She huffs a laugh. “It’s like hoping for your 1 year old to go to bed without a tantrum.”

“That’s right,” I suddenly remember. “You had a baby last year. Congrats on that Clara.”

She laughs again, “You’re sweet Harry. Thanks. It’s been a hell of a year but I’m a glutton for punishment because all I can think of is skipping the after party to bury my face in my daughter’s. She’s probably asleep though. I’d wake her up.”

I imagine Clara with her daughter, she was always mothering her friends when I’d hang out with y/n in school. “I can see you being a wonderful mum. Your daughter probably adores you.”

“Not as much as I adore her,” Clara sighs. I chuckle and another laugh comes from the other side of me. I startle to see y/n walking beside me.

How long had she been there? Our eyes meet and the smile she sends me is sweet and innocent. Like that day in school long ago when she walked in on me tinkering away on my guitar and asked me to play something for her.

It throws me off just like it did then. I turn away.

“We’re just gonna walk there!” Someone ahead of us shouts back to the group.

“In these heels?” Someone complains.

“The girls can take a car?” Hailey suggests. So some of the bridesmaids pile into one but Clara and y/n stay with Hailey.

“I’m sensible now,” Clara stretches her heel-less foot out. “Y/n you sure you don’t want the ride?”

“I’ve been dancing without these for the last two hours.” Y/n shrugs. “My feet can handle the walk.”

“Are we betting how long it takes to get kicked out?” I ask the remainder of the crew.

Bets start flying, I bet 40 minutes.

“D’you think the cherry tree is still there? That was probably the loveliest bit of our school every spring.” Clara asks. “I haven’t been back in ages.”

“Yeah!” Hailey pipes in. “We did some of our photos there when we did save the dates. We ended up using the ones at the garden though.”

I glance at y/n, I can’t help it. She has the same idea because she looks at me too. I didn’t understand what was happening tonight. I’d nearly given up on reconciling but here she was suddenly giving me softened looks, her hard edges dulling down enough for me to bump into her shoulder and try joking.

“Don’t get any ideas.”

“What?” She balks. “Ideas?!”

“Hey Har,” Hailey turns to me. “D’you still play? That guitar remembers guys? He was always playing that thing.”

I avoid y/n’s gaze now.

“Not really.”

“Harry’s a tight-ass finance bloke now,” Ramo says for me. “That creative spirit died after he and a little somebody-“

“I’m not,” I cut Ramo off knowing he was going to say something that would make all of us awkward. I continue to avoid y/n’s attention. “A tight-ass finance bloke. I like to think I’m a fine-ass finance bloke. And it’s because I just don’t get the time these days.”

“You were so good,” comes y/n’s thoughtful commentary.

“He was wasn’t he?!” Hailey continues. “Thought I’d see you on TV or something. That show with the contestants? I always thought if anyone from school went on there it’d be Harry.”

“Thanks Hailey,” I’m uncomfortable under everyone’s scrutiny. And the way Abe keeps wriggling his eyebrows at me and tilting his head to y/n.

By now we’ve reached the school grounds and watch as the rest of the girls scramble out of the car. I spot the cherry tree on the far side, no longer in bloom and smaller than I remember.

There’s a buzz about the group, like being together all these years later in the schoolyard brings with it some life-changing magic. Like time’s worn thin tonight and we can almost reach out and touch our school selves.

“Hailey and Michael!!” Ramo shouts incredibly loud. My 40 minute bet shrinks to 20. “Official Mr. And Mrs!! Let’s fucking go!!!”

They all take off down the field, open bottles dangling from their hands, jackets and gowns flying in the wind as they go.

I take off after them, laughing as a bubble of relief flows up from my lungs. It was just like before, running across the school field with my mates, laughing and shouting random shite into the world.

I glance to my side and y/n’s pumping her legs but falling behind the group. I hold out my hand without thinking but she comes to a full stop. So do I.

“These fucking heels.” She peels them off and sighs in relief, tossing them to the side and taking a swig of her wine bottle.

“You might need those later.”

“Fuck those heels!” She shouts louder.

I laugh and hold out my hand, “We’re falling behind. C’mon!”

She grabs it and we run to catch up, and I’m grinning so hard I feel like my cheeks are going to split. This might be an illusion of a moment I could only dream of but I didn’t care. Despite the night sky and nippy air, everything was sunny and golden.

The finish line was the cherry tree at the end of the yard and our friends pile around it, out of breath.

“Jesus I’ve got stitches,” Clara complains. “I’m never doing that again.”

Hailey giggles and wraps her arms around her husband. “I love all of you so much. Thanks for making this day so special.”

We all pour our love back to the couple. Alcohol and conversation begins to flow around the group and eventually I find y/n sitting beside me tugging at the grass.

“So you really don’t play anymore?” She asks softly after a while.

Her eyes are round and inquisitive as she asks, and I could drown in them. I think of everything I could tell her about not playing—how it made me think of her, how it hurt too much to play after a while, how that part of me was dead and I didn’t like to dredge it up anymore.

Instead I shake my head and leave it hanging, staring down into my lap.

“Why?” She whispers, edging closer to me so that our knees nearly touch. I wonder if she notices or if it even matters.

Again I think of all the reasons and my eyes fill with tears as I do. I’d shut away so much of myself because I had too much love for y/n that couldn’t go anywhere. I’d shut the love away and myself as well.

She taps my knee and I look up, her eyebrows scrunch together when she notices the tears.

“You were supposed to do big things with that guitar of yours,” she whispers to me. And it sounds exactly like something she would have said to me all those years ago. It’s too much. I take the bottle of wine sitting beside her and take a swig. She watches me with concern.

“Music,” I clear my throat when my voice comes out hoarse. “Music didn’t really hold the same magic afterwards. After we…I stopped…speaking in it.”

“Well fuck. That makes me really sad.”

“It’s alright—numbers became my new language.”

“How depressing!”

I laugh and cut myself short when it nearly turns into a sob.

I was sitting with y/n after all these years, under the cherry tree, and she was farther away than ever.

“I’m sorry,” I say again. “For being a chicken. Leaving before you left me. Then I just watched you go.”

Y/n opens her mouth and closes it after a second. Voices from the group drift over to us, Michael discussing honeymoon plans, Clara showing Dinis photos of her daughter, someone talking about a teacher we all hated.

“That was really sweet what you said to Clara earlier,” y/n says. It’s so random it takes me a second to recall.

“Oh yeah. Well she was always fussing over your friends like a mum. At least whenever I hung out with all of you.”

“She did. Makes sense she’s the first of us to be a mum. Although it wasn’t really planned—I’m really glad it turned out like this for her in the end.”

I nod, unsure where this was going.

“Har I-“ y/n’s voice sticks and she quiets again. It kills me to wait instead of telling her to spit it out.

“Y/n,” I say gently when she presses her lips together and doesn’t speak. I nudge her knee this time. “What?”

Our eyes meet and a galaxy of things rush between us. Memories, like distant stars, flicker with joy and pain. We’re caught between them—caught in the gravitational pull of the past and the very solid present of each other.

“I…I was hurting so bad after. After you said-after we broke up. I forgot you were probably hurting too. That the hurt could have always lingered too.” Y/n admits.

I forget to breathe as a constellation of emotions pools in our eyes, an ache from the unspoken admission that maybe we had missed each other all of this time.

“We were so young,” y/n continues. She picks at the grass. I imagine it helps feel in controls amidst the emotional storm happening between us.

“We were.”

“So free,” she laughs a little.

“Yeah. Too free. I don’t think I realized what I wanted until it was too late.”

“You had the whole summer,” the soft accusation cuts deep. I feel the gravity of how much it affected her.

“I was so scared of the hurt I…”

“Yet we hurt anyway.”

Those four words suck the oxygen out of my lungs, I couldn’t respond even if I wanted to.

We sit in another silence, I think about the version of us that didn’t leave the cherry tree separately. The version that kept holding on.

Maybe there could be a version of us that comes back to the cherry tree and leaves together this time. That thought spurs me into action.

I stand and brush the grass off my pants. Y/n watches me with a confused expression.

I hold my hand out to her for the second time that evening.

“Dance with me under the cherry tree?”

She flushes as our friends quiet down. But she grips my hand and I pull her up towards me.

“Really?” She whispers.

“Where’s the music?” One of our friends asks and as we begin our slow dance a phone breaks out in a slow number. It makes y/n giggle.

“This is incredibly cheesy.”

“Just embrace it.” I tell her. “The last time we were here-“

“We don’t have to keep talking about it,” she looks up at me. “It was so long ago. We can’t change the past. We really were young and we just have to-“

“Y/n,” I cut her off. “We were young but our love was real.”

This leaves her speechless. She simply furrows her brows and blinks away whatever emotion it pulls forth. And with her arms locked tightly behind me and my arms on her waist, we continue to sway. A quiet yearning defying time and distance fills the space between us; even as I pull her flush against me and she buries her face in my neck.

“That’s more like it,” I can hear Abe say in the back with a whistle before everyone laughs and goes back to chattering.

“So,” y/n says softly after a while. “When I blew you off at the wedding you were going to say something.”

I hardly remember. I was going to say a lot and I was probably a few drinks in.

“I lied.” She continues. “I tried to forget about you. I held onto the anger so I wouldn’t hurt when I thought about you. Then I looked you up every once in a while expecting some musical thing attached to your name but I never did see anything—now I know why.”

“Yeah,” I chuckle.

“So you really stopped after we broke up?”

“Yes,” I say again. “I tried that summer but everything sounded like…like a donkey trying to sing. I gave up on it ever sounding good again.”

“That’s a shame Harry,” she says and I know she means it but I don’t want to focus on me.

“So you looked me up did you?”

“Don’t start on that,” she flushes. I drop it but not the smile on my face. She notices and buries her face into my shoulder.

We continue swaying to whatever song was queued on our friends’ phone. It feels like we’re all 17 again and staying up later than our parents would like. It felt like we were all young and free, not 20-somethings sitting around our married friends.

“I can’t believe we’re all back here again.” I comment.

“I know. Feels fake. Especially being back here, with you.”

“I hope this is alright?” I pause but y/n tightens her grip.

“It is. Y’know no matter how many people filled the space after you.” Y/n says. “It was never you.”

My breath catches. Was she saying-

“Incoming!” Someone shouts and before I can ask where the group erupts in chaos. People run every way I’m surprised nobody bumps heads.

“What!?” I say just as a flashlight beam cuts across my face. The police. “Oh fuck! Let’s go!”

I grab y/n’s hand and we run away from whatever authority was stalking towards us with flashlights.

It’s just like the old days.

“Harry!” I hear Thomas yell up ahead and I veer to the right towards it.

“Ow! Shit!” I hear y/n shout behind me before she releases my hand.

“What? What are you doing?!” I rush back to her.

She’s picking a rock out of her foot, behind her the lights grow closer.

“Those fucking heels!” I shout.

“Bad decision!” She tosses another pebble off her foot.

“No time! Get on!”

“What?” She freezes but I turn around and crouch, tugging her arms around me so she can get the hint. She loops her legs around my waist and even though I’m slowed down we somehow make it, laughing and stumbling, towards Thomas and Abe. They wave at us from just beyond the school ground and once we make it in the clear we head back to the venue and our parked cars.

“That was insane,” they gush.

“Felt like the golden years,” I grin.

“The fucking golden years,” they laugh.

“Okay designated drivers,” Michael says when he catches sight of us. “We have to get out of here.”

There’s a final round of bidding the newlyweds adieu and waving them off. I look for y/n once they blink out of sight.

“I came with Jamie,” she wraps her arms around herself.

I take my jacket off and drape it around her. I’m transported to doing the exact same thing after house parties because y/n would complain that a jacket would ruin her outfit and then walk home shivering.

“What if you go home with someone else?” I ask.

“You’ve got a car?”

“No,” I regret not driving myself now. “I came with one of the boys.”

“Shite.”

“Yeah…”

“Where are you staying?” She asks.

“Uhm…I came from my flat. Near Shoreditch.”

“Oh right.” She looks away. “You live in the city…right. I’m staying at my mum’s.”

“That’s not too far. My parents still live down the road from yours.”

“I know,” she smiles. “What if you dropped me home? And I invite you in?”

“Y/n,” I tug her closer. “What’s this you’re suggesting?”

“Staying?”

The sight of her, the feel of her, her scent and her perfect hand on my chest envelop me. I couldn’t say no; I was under her spell.

“That would turn this amazing evening into an amazing weekend.”

“And who knows what comes next,” she whispers as I lean the rest of the way. I want to kiss her.

“I want to kiss you.”

She doesn’t respond. She simply stretches up and presses her lips to mine. My heart collects itself and explodes in an explosion of slime.

She feels the exact same, tastes the same, but the confidence is new. It makes me dizzy. I want her even more.

“Get a fucking room!” Thomas says from behind. “Are you two gonna need a ride or planning on shagging in the bushes over there?”

I flip him off and finish the perfect kiss, using every bit of my willpower as y/n’s hand trails down my neck and back to my chest.

“Go on,” I say without even looking at my friends. “We’ve got an after after party.”

“Gross,” someone grumbles behind us.

“G’night!” Y/n shouts and with our chests heaving we break apart, grab hold of each other’s hands, and begin the walk to her house.

We walk in silence—our hands swinging between us tells you everything you need to know about how we were feeling.

At her front door y/n smiles up at me. It feels like deja vu, standing in her doorway with her looking at me like that. Knowing we were going to her bedroom just to get in bed. Time folds in on itself as I press a kiss to her lips.

“I’m so glad I couldn’t stay angry tonight,” she strokes my face. “I would’ve missed all this.”

“Me too,” I whisper. “I’m glad my mug’s so handsome it wore you down.”

She rolls her eyes but she’s smiling. “It wasn’t the mug. Although it is even more handsome than the last time I saw it.”

I kiss her, “Mmm then what was it that wore you down?”

“I dunno,” she sighs. “You? Us?”

Us.

“Whatever it was, I’ll make sure to write it a thank you note. Now why don’t you open that door because my hands are not going to stay PG for very long. And I’m pretty sure your mum’s got one of those camera doorbells.”

“Oh god,” she whips around and laughs before slapping a hand to her mouth. “Sorry mum!”

We stifle our laugh and step inside. Deja vu comes rushing at me again at the familiarity of her home.

As we sneak up to her room I think about what y/n said. It was true, even though she couldn’t pinpoint it. Despite how we felt at the beginning of the night it was always going to end this way. Something about us was always meant to come back to each other.

You. Us. Her.

It was always her.

[fiapartridge]

different | kent johnson

"maybe this time it'll be different..."

kent johnson x hughes!sister

summary: when kent arrives to the lake house two years after breaking up with y/n hughes, he has so much more planned than wakeboarding with the boys-- he's going to get her back.

warning(s): cursing

a/n: i remembered someone requesting a kj fic so here we are!! it's my first one! so! try not to hate it too much! LOL

Kent hadn’t anticipated coming to the lake house like this: sopping wet from the rain that only seemed to pour when Kent arrived since all the days leading up to this were sunny skies with a chance of nothing– absolutely zero rain, except for the day he showed up. Great.

And to make matters even worse, he hadn’t even been invited to the lake house, turning up unannounced. Luke and the rest of the Hughes’ cut contact with Kent after his and Y/N’s breakup. I mean, he didn’t expect them to take his side or feel some sort of sympathy for him, but he also didn’t know he was gonna lose everyone because of it. 

Luke Hughes had invited Kent to the lake house every summer since meeting him, claiming him as the “cool older brother he never had.” (Jack and Quinn had of course taken offense from that, but he was right. Kent was cool.) But when Kent broke up with Y/N after the 2021 draft, making up the excuse of not wanting to “drag her along” while he was busy in the NHL, Luke couldn’t help but be there for his sister. At first, he hadn’t taken sides. Luke wasn’t a part of the relationship, so obviously their friendship would be fine— but once he heard how hurt and worthless she felt, he couldn’t be friends with him. He would never be friends with a person that could make his sister feel that bad about herself. 

For months, she wondered what she could’ve possibly done to make him walk out like that, especially on a day that was supposed to be so special. Maybe… maybe she was just a thing to pass the time with until his life really began. She wasn’t meant to be in his life, not the life he planned at least, she was just something that happened— and apparently he wasn’t one for spontaneity.

Until now. As he stands at the door of the Hughes family’s summer home, the memories of spending warm July nights huddled around the small table that sat on the front porch, littered with beer bottles and red solo cups, flooding back to him. Y/N sitting comfortably on his lap, her brothers making gagging noises every time they kissed, his UMich teammates picking her up and running through the house to the backyard, throwing Y/N into the pool and pushing Kent in with her. 

They don’t even text him anymore. And he thought that losing them would’ve been the worst part, but they weren’t the people that he told everything to; what he was feeling; how anxious he felt about the future; how excited he was after scoring his first goal at Yost. his frustration over his terrible gameplay the month before the draft, fearing that none of the teams would draft him if they saw how he was playing then. That was all Y/N— and he blew it.

He wasn’t even thinking, he didn’t know what to say, his actions spoke before him as he knocked on the door, hearing the loud chatter on the other side come to a halt. And before he knew it, he was face-to-face with his old teammate, Luke.

Stepping onto the porch and closing the door behind him, Luke’s face couldn’t be mistaken for anything but anger. 

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Luke spat.

Kent wasn’t expecting a warm welcome, but he also wasn’t expecting a full on war the minute he knocked on the door. He really should’ve thought out his words on the way here.

“I know that everyone in that house hates me,” Luke scoffed, muttering something under his breath as Kent cautiously continued. “But I need to talk to Y/N. I fucked up, I know, and it’s too late, but please. I just need to see her.”

“Even if I told her you were here, I don’t think she’d even want to talk to you.”

Ouch.

“I know you’ll never forgive me for what I did to your sister, and I have no excuse for that, but just— give me one last chance with her. I just want to talk.”

Luke stood there, processing it all. He hated Kent for what he had done. None of the other boys were there to hold Y/N when she would fall asleep with tears in her eyes, they weren’t there when she would stumble into his bed late at night because she didn’t trust herself to be alone in her room, they weren’t there to hear her beat up herself for what had happened, thinking that this whole thing was her fault, that she could’ve prevented this from happening if she was just… better.

But he also remembered how happy Kent made her feel when they were together. 

So he gave him a chance. One singular chance.

“Y/N,” Kent froze upon seeing her. She looked so different, yet so the same. She wore her hair down now instead of in messy buns or high ponies, she was taller, and her baby face was gone, her cheeks growing a bit slimmer. She still had that rosy pink complexion that she always carried around with her and she still wore the silver charm bracelet she had when they were together. She was still so beautiful, if not more than when he last saw her.

Her arms were crossed over her chest, closing herself off to him. She looked hesitant, apprehensive. She had spent the first year after their breakup hoping that he would come back and tell her that it was all a big mistake, that he didn’t mean to break up with her, that he was just overwhelmed, that he wanted her back. The second year, she accepted it; that he wasn’t coming back. So why was she feeling like nothing had changed, that all her progress meant nothing, that she would crumble and go back to the way it was that first year, hoping he’d make his way back to her, in her arms, on her lips, in her heart.

For him, she was a mess. That she never grew out of— as much as she wished she would.

“Why are you here, Kent?”

Hearing his full name come out of her mouth was like a dagger to his chest. But he did that. He ruined everything. Did he really have the right to feel bad for himself?

He licked his lips, trying to find his words. Any words, really. “I still care about you, Y/N/N. I never stopped.”

“So why did you throw it all away?” she asked, poking her finger at his chest. “And don’t give me the bullshit excuse of ‘dragging me along’ because you were three fucking hours away! That wouldn’t have changed anything!”

“I was stupid, okay!” he shouted back, his voice cracking. “I was overwhelmed, and I was lost, and I knew I wouldn’t be enough for you, that I couldn’t be there, and be the person that you deserved.”

She scoffed, shaking her head. This is not how she thought seeing him again would go. “Did you think you couldn’t have told me? That I wouldn’t understand? We could’ve worked through it! We could’ve been together through it all! We could’ve seen if it really was gonna work or not! But you didn’t even want to give us a chance.”

Backing away, her hand fell from his chest, slipping to the door knob behind her. It’s like he was losing her all over again. He couldn’t let that happen, not again.

Holding onto her wrist, he felt her stop in her tracks. Maybe she was just waiting for the right words, and while he didn’t know what the right words were, he decided to jump off the deep end nonetheless. 

“My biggest regret was walking away from you, Y/N. And I know this means nothing, that I put you through so much that you didn’t deserve, and you can hate me all you want, tell me to leave and I’ll go, but please— please just hear me out.”

Her forehead rested against the door. “Five minutes,” she mumbled before spinning around. “You have five minutes to talk.”

Kent didn’t waste a single second. “I’m still in love with you. I’ve been trying to convince myself that I’m not, but you mean the world to me, Y/N, and I shouldn’t have let that go, let us go, let you go. And if you give me another chance,” she pulled her wrist away from him, his chest speeding up. Please don’t go. “I won’t make the same mistake again. And I know that you’re scared, that we might end up doing this whole shit storm all over again, and I can’t promise that we won’t, but if you just give me a chance, just one chance, maybe this time it’ll be different.”

Kent’s words hung in the air as Y/N stood there, listening to his earnest plea. The rush of memories and emotions hit her like a tidal wave. The wounds of their breakup were still there, scars etched into her skin, a reminder of him every time she went to Yost and he wasn’t there, or when she would stalk his Instagram, swearing to her friends that she would block him this time, yet she always failed. 

She had spent so much time convincing herself that she was better off without him, that she could thrive on her own, but as he stood there, telling her the one thing she wished she heard from him years ago, that he still loved her, she wasn’t so sure anymore.

Her brows narrowed, her bottom lip stuck between her teeth. “Why should I believe you?”

“You can’t. But, Y/N, I have spent the past two years regretting everything, and wishing you were beside me. After my first game, I looked into the stands and when you weren’t there, I… I knew I fucked up, that you were the best thing that’s ever happened to me, that I’ve never been as happy as I was with you. And you can choose to not believe me when I say that I won’t walk out on us again, but please just think about it. Please.”

Y/N’s head was a whirlwind of conflicting emotions. She was torn between the fear of getting hurt again and the desire to give him another chance. Kent’s sincerity was real and honest, but could she really trust him not to run away when things got tough?

“No more running away. No more not talking about things. If we want this to work, I need to trust you again.”

“I’m not leaving. It’s you, you’re all I need,” he said, laying his forehead against hers. “I’ll do my best to show you I’ve changed, just make me yours again.”

In that moment, with their hearts racing and their emotions raw, Y/N’s gaze locked onto Kent’s nervous eyes. There was a certain vulnerability in his expression that echoed her own, and her mind battled between caution and the undeniable pull she still felt towards him. She’d felt that pull the second she saw him on the porch. It wasn’t something that could just go away, and in that moment, she was grateful for that.

As Kent’s fingers gently brushed against her cheek, Y/N felt a shiver run down her spine. His touch was gentle, hesitant, as if he feared shattering the fragile bridge they were building between them.

Y/N’s breath caught as Kent’s lips descended upon hers, a soft press that held a world of unspoken promises. It was a tentative kiss, a meeting of lips that carried the weight of the aching past, the hope that they could fix what was broken, and the need for his lips since the moment they broke up.

The kiss deepened, a slow progression that was both hesitant and passionate. Kent’s arms encircled Y/N, pulling her closer as her fingers curled around the fabric of his shirt, her heart racing as she surrendered to the kiss, allowing herself to be enveloped by the flood of emotions that came with it.

Their lips moved against each other with a tender intensity, as if they were trying to convey all the unspoken words and emotions that had accumulated during their time apart. In that moment, the world around them seemed to fade, the rain stopped, the muffled voices on the other side of the door were gone— it was just them. 

  When they finally pulled away, their breaths were mingled, their foreheads resting against each other. Y/N’s eyes met Kent’s once again, and she could see the genuine regret and love he still had for her. She knew he hadn’t seen anyone for the past two years, Blanks liked to remind her of that everytime he tried to get them back together.

“I’m not leaving,” Kent whispered, his voice laced with sincerity. “I meant what I said, Y/N. You’re all I need, and I’m here to prove it. This time, it’ll be different.”

[starrrbakerrr]

High School Musical: The Musical: The Series Bloopers (part 1/?)

[opheliahotchner]

i love you joshua bassett but i would absolutely hate to be you right now

[thatgirlstrawberry]

💛Sunshine💛 - The Scene

In which you all read about Spencer’s family life

Overall warnings: Overall warnings: mentions of sex, children, violence, regular cm stuff

Spencer felt dizzy.

He felt like his whole world was shattering as he walked up the pathway to the safe house that wasn't so safe anymore.

He pushed through dozens of policemen and FBI but stopped when he reached the porch

No one had been inside yet. They wanted to wait for the BAU to get there first and there was no reason to suspect that anything was still going on inside.

Spencer was the first one on the scene. Morgan had stupidly called him while he was on his way to get coffee before he headed into the office.

Morgan told Spencer that the officer they placed outside of the safe house was murdered and her turned the car right around and sped to the house.

His heart broke when he saw that the door was wide open.

He slowly stepped inside of the house. He looked around and his heart dropped.

It was a mess. There was broken furniture, blood.

Blood.

He saw a bloody handprint on the door to the basement. The keypad was also covered in the red substance.

Maybe she and the kids got down. He thought, walking towards it slowly. He punched in the 3 digit number that he remembered from a conversation with Derek.

The key pad lit green and he heard the lock click. He slowly opened the door and peeked down.

His feet carried him down the stairs slowly and quietly. He stopped for a second to try and hear anything down there.

~

Joey sat against the wall in the darkest corner of the basement. Sadie was sat in his lap and he had his hand over her mouth.

He had heard the door open and quickly scrambled to scoop her up and away from the box of cereal she was eating out of. It scattered and spilled all over the floor.

Joey knew that Sadie was scared so he did his best to keep a smile on his lips every time she looked back at him.

He shut his eyes when the footsteps of whoever was coming down the stairs got closer. Sadie started to let out whimpers and he shook his head.

"Sadie, please be quiet." He whispered, almost inaudibly.

~

An open, spilled cereal box came into Spencer's view as he stepped on to the cold stone floor. He accidentally stepped on a few pieces and cursed.

He sighed shakily and looked around but the sound of whimpering made him freeze.

It sounded just like Sadie when she fell off her kiddie bike three years ago.

"Sadie?" He whispered out hesitantly, trying not to sound scary. "Sadie, bunny, is that you?"

~

Sadie ripped her brother's hand off of her mouth and crawled off of his lap.

"Daddy!?" She shouted.

"Sadie, wait!" Joey reached out for her but she rushed out of the dark and around the corner.

Joey scrambled up from his spot on the floor and ran after her, stopping when he saw his dad picking Sadie up.

"Oh, dad..." Joey tried to hold in a sob.

Spencer sink to his knees as Sadie hugged him tight. He looked over the girl's shoulder and held his hand out for Joey.

He ran forward wrapped his arms around his dad. "Are you guys okay?" Spencer asked, rubbing his children's backs.

Sadie could do nothing but cry into her father's neck and Joey was trying to get words out. "What h-happened to your mom? Where's Charlie?"

"Mommy locked us down here!" Sadie sobbed. "She was so mad!"

Spencer shook his head. "No, baby. I'm sure mommy wasn't mad at you. Where is she? Where's your brother?"

"He took them!" Sadie cried.

Spencer pulled her off of him and held her at arm's length. "Who, Bunny? Who?"

They heard footsteps at the top of the stairs and looked up. "Marcus Gellar." Derek spoke, placing his hands on his hips. "Marcus Gellar, Audrey's brother, is the unsub."

Spencer turned back to the kids and glanced back and forth between them. "Is that who you saw here? Uncle Marcus?"

Sadie nodded and Joey looked up at Derek and back down at Spencer. "He hurt her. He hurt mom."

"She was bleeding from her back and she fell on her belly." Sadie cried. Spencer wanted to cry.

He wanted to scream and cry and run out of that house and go on a rampage to find his wife and son.

But he had to take care of the kids in front of him. "Okay." He nodded. "Okay, I'm gonna find mommy but we gotta go, okay? We're gonna go home for a little bit."

"We get to go home?" Sadie asked through tears.

Spencer nodded. "Yes, baby, we're gonna go home."

Joey shook his head. "B-but we need to find mom and- and Charlie." He said, his breathing picking up. "M-om and Charlie are mi-issing!" He shouted.

Derek walked down the stairs and scooped Sadie up out of Spencer's arms when he noticed Joey's rising panic.

Spencer spun to face his son on his knees and he pressed his cool hands on his cheeks. "Joey, I need you to take a deep breath for me." He nodded.

"I ca-an't, d-" He was now gasping for air.

Spencer unzipped the boy's jacket, hoping that the tight feeling in his chest would go away. "Joey, come on. Breath with me." He placed his hand on Joey's chest and inhaled deeply, nodding his head.

Joey's chest heaved as a tear ran down his face. His chest stuttered as he tried to match his dad's breathing.

"Breathe with me." Spencer nodded once again.

Joey was finally able to take a slow, deep breath. He shut his eyes as he exhaled and Spencer gave the boy a sad smile. "There you go, Joe. Just keep taking deep breaths."

"Spencer." The man looked up at the top of the stairs. Emily and Hotch stood there. "We need to talk."

He nodded and looked at Derek. "C-can you take them out to the car?" He asked.

"No, daddy! Don't go!" Sadie began to cry again.

Spencer tilted his head. "I'll be right out, okay? I promise." He nodded. "Just go with Uncle Derek and I'll be right out to take you home."

Sadie nodded slowly and Derek and the kids walked up the stairs. He followed them but walked over to the kitchen where Emily and Hotch waited.

Emily cleared her throat, clearly uncomfortable and straightened out her jacket. Hotch's face was the same as always, stone cold.

"How did you guys figure out that it was Marcus?" Spencer asked as he walked over.

Hotch crossed his arms. "We'll explain that later. Right now, we need to talk."

Spencer bit his lip. "O-okay."

Emily sighed. "After we went to Marcus' safe house when we found out it was him, he was gone." She nodded. "And we immediately thought to come here but on the way, PD notified us of a call they got from across the street from Lisa and Cole's."

Hotch cleared his throat. "Marcus unfortunately stopped there before coming here." He explained. "The neighbors saw the front door open early this morning and went in. Both Lisa and Cole were found dead in the kitchen."

Spencer's heart hurt.

He didn't know how much more he could take. His wife and firstborn were missing, his unborn baby might be hurt, his wife was injured, his parents in law were dead. He inhaled deeply trying to choke down tears.

"Oh, Spencer." Emily whispered. She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around his neck. "It's gonna be okay."

All Spencer could do was shake his head. "We just need to find my wife and my kid. Then it will all be okay."

Hotch sighed. "Spencer, we also need to talk about the case."

Spencer pulled away from Emily and looked at Hotch. "Okay...?"

"You can't be on it."

Spencer furrowed his brows. "I'm sorry- what the fuck did you just say to me?" He asked, taking a step forward.

"Reid-"

"This is my wife and my fucking child we're talking about, and you really want me to just sit around and if nothing?" He asked, not even realizing that his feet carried him closer.

Hotch tilted his head. "Reid, I would refrain from stepping any closer to me." He raised his eyebrows a bit. "Step back and we can talk about this."

He shook his head. "No, I'm taking my kids home. My kids need to go home." He told them.

Spencer turned away from them and walked outside. He saw Derek buckling Sadie into the car seat in the back of his car and Joey was sitting back there with her. Usually he would get in the front seat but he wanted to be with his sister.

Spencer nodded at Derek with a thin, sad smile as the man tossed him his keys. "Reid."

He paused and turned to him. "Yeah?"

"We're gonna get them back." He nodded. "I swear. If it's the last thing I do, we'll bring them home to you, got it?"

Spencer nodded. "Got it."

.•.••.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•��..

HELLLOOOOOOOO

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! (This is not edited)

Now obviously it would be boring as fuck if Spencer just sat at home while his team kicked ass so...

WHOS READY FOR ROGUE!SPENCER??? I know I am.

Also Sades and Joey are gonna be so traumatized and I feel bad but it had to be done for the sake of ✨drama✨

[perfectlywrongformend3s]

Shark Week-Joshua Bassett

(not my gif)

A/n: Thank you so much for requesting, I would love to write this one for you. I will be more then happy to write about Joshua cause I love him so much.

Taglist: @justagirl22

-Samantha

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your POV

I was in the kitchen making cookies when I got this sharp pain in my stomach. I steadied myself with the counter. When I felt good to move I walked right to the bathroom to see if my monthly visiter came and I was right. I looked around to find a my things for it, when I found them I noticed I was low on pads. I sighed but quickly finished in the bathroom and walked back to the kitchen to try and finish baking.

I kept feeling sharp pains which were bothering me, but I kept pushing through it.

Joshua's POV

I was in the studio today recording for my new album. I was taking a small break at the moment and couldn't help, but think of Y/n/n.

" Josh 10 more minutes than back to work." the producer said

I nodded and went through my socials until then.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was officially done recording for the day, which means I was able to go home to Y/n. I got to my car and started it and drove.

Your POV

I finished baking half the cookie dough when I got more intense cramps making me stop all together. I moved to the couch and curled up to help my stomach pain. All I could think about was Josh and wishing he was here with me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I finally heard the door open after an hour of silence. I then heard his calming voice.

" I'm home...did you make something?" he questioned

I just hummed in response. I had my eyes squeezed shut feeling another strike of pain hit me. I heard his footsteps coming over to the living room.

" You okay..." he asked with concern

I opened my eyes. " Just cramps." I whispered

He nodded walking closer to me. He sat next to me and said, " Need anything, baby." Pulling Me into his side while rubbing my arm. "I'm running low on pads, maybe some chocolate." I whispered

He let out a small chuckle. " Anything for you, love. But before I run to the store, why don't I run you a warm bath."

I looked up at him. " Really, you would do that." I said softly

" Of course, anything to make my girl happy." He said kissing the side of my head before standing up to set up my bath.

Joshua's POV I walked into the bathroom getting out some relaxing things to put in her bath. I made sure the water was warm enough for her. I light some candles, put her water bottle and one of her books on the tray lying a crossed the tub. I then walked back to the living room to grab her.

" Are you ready?" I questioned

She smiled and nodded reaching for my out stretched hand. I helped her off the couch and led her into the bathroom.

" Josh..." She whispered when she saw it

I was gonna say something, but she interrupted me. " You didn't have to do all this." I could hear her voice crack. " Baby, don't cry...I just wanted you to be comfortable." I said pulling her into me

I rubbed her back and let her to get her emotions out. She pulled away after a couple seconds to look back at the scene.

" It's all for you..." I said gently taking her phone from her pocket to play her music on low. She turned to face me, " Thank you..." She whispered giving me a soft smile.

" You're welcome, before I head to the store, do you need anything else?" I questioned her

She fiddled with her fingers before asking. " Maybe some of the cookies that are ready." I smiled, " Anything for you angel."

I walked out of the room to grab her some cookies.

Your POV

I watched him leave before I then stripped and got into the bath carefully. I let out a soft sigh of relief. I heard a chuckle, and turned my head to find Josh walking back in. " I see you are already feeling better." He said placing my plate of cookies down. " Well it feels good on my muscles." I said

He smiled and kneeled down. " I bet, okay I'll be back." He said giving me a kiss

I smiled and nodded, kissing back. I watched him leave a second time before sinking more into the water to relax.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Joshua's POV

It took me an hour to get back to the house due to LA traffic. I walked up to our door and opened it. When I walked in it was eerie quiet again.

" Babe..." I said walking to set the bags down on the kitchen counter. I headed to the bathroom forty only to find it empty making me nervous. I walked into our bedroom next to find her curled up to her chest. I let out a soft sigh of relief walking over to her. I rested a gentle hand on her shoulder. She stirred some before her eyes fluttered open.

" Josh..." She whispered

I moved to sit against the headboard. " It's me Y/n/n." I softly said

She smiled and rolled over to rest her head on my chest making me smile. " Does you stomach still hurt?" I questioned with a little bit of concern

She snuggled into me a little more making me pull her closer. " A little bit." She whispered

I nodded and moved my hand over to her stomach and started making little circles hoping to ease the pain some. I heard her let out a sigh of relief. " Does that feel good?" I questioned

She hummed in agreement making me continue to do the small motion so she could keep the happy smile. I also pecked her head a couple times just to see her cuddle into me more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I really hope you like this one. I actually really love how this one turned out. I just didn't know how to end it so I hope the ending was okay. Thank you for the lovely request again.

-Samantha

[ktisherelol]

It Just Happened ~ Ricky Bowen X Reader

Summary: (You are aged up in this) You and Ricky have been friends since you were young, and you have a small crush on him. One day when he comes over, things get juicy.

Warnings: Cussing, fluff, alcohol, smut.

Pairing: Ricky Bowen X Female reader (you can change it if you'd like).

-----------------

"I'm bored." says Jenna, my friend since first grade. I sat down next to her, "What do you wanna do?"

"I don't know. Should we invite more people? There's nothing to do. And omg it's a great day outside." says Jenna

"Okay, I'll call Ricky." I say

"The one you kinda like?" asks Jenna

"... How do you know that?" I ask

"Your face lit up when you said Ricky."

"Well... Okay, maybe I kinda like him. But that doesn't mean I won't hang out with you."

Jenna laughs, "Come on. I'll leave, I have things to do anyway. Have fun with your boyfriend."

"Jennaa..." I say

"Y/nnnnn..." says Jenna

"Stayyy." I say

"No, I will be leaving, and youu are gonna thank me and that's that! Now byeeeee!" she says and leaves before I can say anything. Well, alright then.

"Fine. Love you!" I say

"Love you, too!" she screams back. Then I call Ricky after asking my mom if he can come over, which she says he's always welcome.

"Hey, Y/n/n. What's up?" he picks up

"Hey, Ricky. Wanna come over?" I ask

"What if I'm not in Salt Lake?"

"Ricky, we both know you are, I saw you two days ago." I say

"What if I moved away?"

"You didn't."

I hear him chuckle, "Alright, fine. I'm coming give me... 10 minutes."

"Alright, byeee!" I say, then hang up.

-----------------

After 10 minutes I hear the doorbell ring. I open it to see Ricky with a grin on his face.

"Heyy, come on in!" I say, and we go to the living room.

"How've you been?" he asks

"I've been, okay. You?" I ask

"Same here. I miss being drunk though." he says, we used to go to parties and drink almost every week. Then high school was over and we both just decided to get a job and not go to college yet.

"How long has it been since you last drank?" I ask

"Eh. About a month." he says

"Wow... How did you survive?" I ask

"I just did..." he says, then sees an alcohol bottle on one of the tables that my brother just forgot to put away after his 'experiment'... Don't ask.

"Ooo!" he tries to grab the bottle and opens it, but I stop him before he does.

"Ricky, no." I say, and grab the bottle away from him, kind of spilling it.

"What? I was just gonna drink a little bit…" he says

"I don't care. Don't drink right now." I say, as I grab a towel to clean the mess Ricky made me do.

"Fine." he says as he watches me clean it. After I'm done cleaning the table, I clean the bottle as well in case it spilled on it. As I close the cap and make sure it's tight I feel Ricky put his head on my shoulder, and his arms around my waist.

"Whatchu doing?" I try and hide my blush.

"Hmm, you're warm." he says in a childish voice.

"Alright." I say, "I need to put the bottle away, though."

"Just put it on the table where you found it." he says, I guess it makes sense. My brother needs to learn to clean after himself anyway.

"Alright, fine." I say putting the bottle back on the table. That's when I realized that Ricky smelled... different. Is he wearing cologne?

"Hey, when did you start wearing cologne--" I started as I turned around but got cut off by his lips smashing on mine, his arms never leaving my waist.

I pull away, "Are you sure you're not drunk..?"

"Yeah." he says, as he kisses me again. I don't say anything, just kiss back and put my arms around his neck.

I feel him sit down on the couch and get me on his lap as he pulls me closer. He pulls me so close that... Omg... I can feel it. I can feel his... Uh... You know...

It's getting harder by the second. He starts to kiss down my neck which gives me a chance to speak, "Ricky, what's gotten into you?"

"Do you know how hot you look right now?" he asks, stopping and looking at me. What does he mean? I'm just wearing a little oversized t-shirt and shorts.

"I'm just wearing a t-shirt." I chuckle

"Well, you always look hot to me anyway." he says. Is he really sure he isn't drunk?

"No, Y/n. I'm not drunk." he says… Shit, did I say that out loud?

"No, you didn't say it out loud, I just know what you're thinking." he says. I mean true, he's known me since first grade.

"Exactly." he says

"Okay, stop reading my thoughts." I say as I reposition myself on his lap because I was kind of crooked. He pulls me closer as I do so.

"Ricky, I don't know if you're in the right mind. You may not be drunk, but you're not thinking straight." I say

"I am. Y/n, I've liked you since... I don't even know, it's been a while. But you haven't paid attention to me at all, so I tried to date Alyssa and other girls to try and distract myself but they never got me the way you did. The way you do. The only reason I tried something today was because Jenna told me you kinda like me." he says

"Jenna said what?" I ask

He chuckles, "Was she right? I-is she right?"

I look him in the eyes trying to pull a prank on him. His slight smile faded, "Oh... Well, alright then. Sorry." he said as he tried to get up.

Then I smirk, "She's right. Don't worry." then I kissed him again, making him moan. I felt him harden even more under me as he pulled me closer, grinding me on him.

"Wanna take this upstairs?" he asks

I smirk, "Sure."

-----------------

The second we enter my room he closes the door and locks it, pinning me against the wall and pulling me close as he kisses me. My arms travel around his neck, then as one arm stays there just tugging on his hair, the other hand travels down to his chest, to his waist, and then I grab his crotch. I just feel how hard it is for a second and make a memory of its shape. He groans and pushes me on the bed, pinning my arms above me.

He kisses me again, grinding onto me making the both of us moan. I take off his shirt as he takes off mine and take a moment to look at his abs.

Holy shit they're insane…

I feel them as he kisses my chest after a moment of looking at them with lust.

His kisses trail down to my stomach, and to my thighs, before he gets to that one spot, he looks up at me asking for permission. But I smirked and flipped us around, "You've had your fun. Now, it's my turn."

He smirks as I start to kiss him again, then start to kiss down his neck.

"That's too bad. I wanted to taste you." he groans.

"You'll taste me some other day." I say as I start trailing kisses down his stomach, feeling his strong muscles, and then stop as I come across his boxers. I look up at him for permission to take them off, but he just smirks and flips us around like I did to him, "Some other time, babe."

His hand then reaches into my panties, and starts drawing circles on my clit, "Wow... All this for me?"

I chuckle, "Looks like it."

He inserts a finger in me, causing me to moan as he moves his finger in and out, then inserting another one.

"Ricky..." I say

"Hmm?" he says

"I need you." I say

"Need me to do what?" he smirks

"I need you inside me." I say

"As you wish." he says, then takes off his boxers, revealing his hard and red member. Without a second thought, he positions his member to my entrance, and slides it in.

It doesn't hurt as much, because I was really horny and wet. But I've heard that normally it does hurt if this is your first time.

"Holy shit. You're so tight. How are you so tight?" Ricky asks between breaths.

"’Cause this is my first time." I say, trying not to moan.

"Hmm, same here." he says

"Really?" I ask surprised.

"Yeah. Why are you so surprised?" he asks

"I don't know. I mean, look at you..." I say

He smirks, “I wouldn't rather do this with anyone but you."

He gets faster. And faster. And even faster. My hands dig into his back as moans fill the room.

After a while we both release as Ricky pulls out.

"Holy... Fuck..." he says while catching his breath.

"Indeed..." I say, he looks at me, "Please tell me we're dating now."

I smirk, "We are."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

[alisonwritesimagines]

Different ~Simon Riley Imagine~

Summary: You and Simon stay connected for the sake of your son. But events eventually lead you two back together in a way you both didn't expect.

Author’s Note: I've had this in my drafts and I was debating if I should release it or not. So I decided to free it from the drafts.

Based on the song Different by Joshua Bassett

Part One

Reader’s Pronouns: She/Her

Warnings: character deaths, spoilers for Modern Warfare 3

Do not repost this anywhere!

Simon wishes he could hate Mitch. In a messed up way he desperately wants to hate him. But he can’t.

He’s a perfect step father to his son and an amazing father to your daughters, he’s the perfect husband, and he’s able to be home with you without making you worry if he was going to come back dead or alive. Mitch is what Simon wishes he was for you.

Ever since Simon found out about his son, he wanted to get to know him. He didn’t never wanted to be like his father. He wanted to be better. So whenever he had the chance, Simon would go see his son.

“Did you see that soccer game the other day?” Mitch asked Simon.

“You mean football?”

“Right right. I forget you Brits call it football.”

“Makes more sense doesn’t it?” Simon asked.

“I guess in a sense.”

It was Levi’s birthday and Simon and Johnny came over to America to visit and celebrate. Levi was officially 8 years old and was now an older brother to two sisters.

“When do you guys plan on coming to visit again?” Simon asked.

“We’re thinking the summer. Might take the kids to Disneyland Paris this time too,” Mitch tells him.

“They’ll enjoy that.”

“How are you and Johnny?” Mitch asked him. The best thing about Mitch, he was never the one to judge. Sure he was upset at Simon for cheating on you but you had told Mitch that you had forgiven Simon and Mitch trusts your judgement.

“Good. Good.”

“Okay boys. I am in need to help now,” you say as you carried your youngest.

“I got her babe,” Mitch said before putting his drink down and taking his youngest daughter in his arms. “You can hang out with me and Uncle Simon.”

“Thank you darling,” you say before giving him a quick kiss.

It always stung in Simon’s heart when you kissed Mitch. It’s selfish of him to think this way but there was always a part of him that wanted you back even after all this time. It was wrong to think this way but he knew he would always love you. Even if he did love Johnny.

After the party, Simon and Johnny helped you and Mitch clean up.

“You know you guys don’t have to stay behind to help clean right?” You asked.

“You did more than enough for today and with planning all this. Go relax,” Simon tells you.

“But-“

“We got this Bonnie. It’s the least we can do for you,” Johnny tells you. You let out a sigh in defeat before walking over to your daughters.

“Okay girls! Bath time,” you say. You picked up your two girls before walking upstairs to get them cleaned. Simon watched with a sad smile as you kissed the top of your daughters’ heads.

—

Simon came straight to you after the worst mission he had ever been on.

You gave Simon a hug the moment he told you the news. Johnny was gone. Killed in action. The last time you saw him heartbroken was when you found out about him and Johnny and you had called him Ghost.

“Anything we can do for you?” You asked him.

“I just need something to distract myself,” Simon tells you.

“Levi has a soccer game tomorrow if you want to join us,” you tell him.

“Yes please.”

“How long have you been grieving?”

“I think long enough.”

“I don’t think so,” you shook your head.

“What-“

“You loved him Simon. It’s okay to be in grief for a long time,” you tell him. Simon hugged you again, not wanting to let you go.

“Thank you.”

“I’m here for you.”

—

Soon, it was Simon’s turn to comfort you. You had lost Mitch in a car accident when he was coming back from work one night. Simon made sure the kids were fed and taken care of while trying to help keep you fed and alive.

“I’m here for you love. I always will be,” Simon tells you. You cried into his chest, passing out from exhaustion on the couch in his arms only an hour later.

Simon was no longer in SAS but he did help with training new recruits after capturing and killing Makrov. Not as dangerous as before but he still had a steady job and was able to take care of you and the kids.

“What if we go out tomorrow night?” Simon asked you one night. It had been five months since he had been helping you with your kids.

“What do you mean?” You asked as you were cleaning up your kitchen.

“Just you and me. We can go see a movie or grab dinner together?” Simon suggested.

“Would this be a date?” You asked him with a look.

“No. More of a hang out,” Simon tells you.

“Okay,” you say unconvinced.

“I don’t want to force you into anything. I’m letting things go slow,” Simon tells you. You nodded before beginning to do the dishes.

-

Levi had reached the age where he was finally old enough to know that Simon was his biological father. You and Simon had sat Levi at the table before telling him the news.

“Do you have any questions for us?” You asked Levi as you sat across from him.

“Why did you leave him?” Levi asked you as he glared at Simon.

“Because he fell in love with someone else.”

“And why are you with him now? Aren’t you afraid he’ll hurt you again? This is bullshit,” Levi said angrily.

“Language,” you warn.

“So you hurt her, let her marry someone else, and once he’s gone you just think you can come back into her life like that?” Levi yelled at Simon who had been silent since the conversation started. He knew that Levi would be mad at him. He knew Levi would be angry. And he didn’t mine because he knew that this would be upsetting.

“Levi, I know I hurt her. I should have never hurt her but I did. We’re going through couples therapy together and it’s been helping us. Your mother has forgiven me enough for me to be back into her life,” Simon explains to him.

“What do I even call you now? My dad is dead and my whole life I’ve only seen you as Uncle Simon. Do you expect me to call you dad now?” Levi asked, still angry at the news.

“You can call me whatever makes you comfortable right now. I don’t expect you or your sisters to accept me now but I am here for you three and your mother,” Simon tells him.

Levi shook his head before getting up and heading towards his room. You looked at Simon with a sad look.

“Do you think we did the right thing?” You asked.

“Yes. He’s old enough now and he just needs to get use to it. It’s better to tell him now than later,” Simon tells you. You nodded before looking at a picture of the wall with you and Mitch.

“I wonder what it would’ve been like if Mitch was still around.”

“Could be the same reaction,” Simon tells you before placing his hand on yours.

—

The girls loved Simon on the other hand. They loved it whenever he caved into their games and how he would let them put makeup or nail polish on him. Mitch took care of Levi and now, Simon was returning the favor in protecting and caring for Mitch’s daughters.

“Uncle Simon?” Your youngest asked Simon one day.

“Yes?”

“How come I can’t see my daddy anymore?” Macy asked him.

“You’ll be able to see him again. Just not now. He’s somewhere where we can’t touch or see but one day in the long future, you’ll see him again,” Simon told her.

He loved the girls. He would protect them no matter what and was always weak whenever they would give him puppy eyes when you say no to them. Simon knew they weren't his daughters, but he can be the best father figure they needed as they grew up.

“Will you ever leave us?” Macy asked him.

“No. Not unless you tell me to leave you,” Simon tells her.

“I don’t want you to leave us,” Macy said as she hugged him.

“Then I won’t leave,” Simon said, hugging her back.

—

Simon had waited this for a long time. To see you in a white dress, walking to him, and saying your vows together. Even if it was in a courtroom with just your kids, your parents, Price, Laswell, and Gaz to witness you two. It was perfect for him.

So here you two are, having dinner with everyone at your favorite restaurant with close friends and family who you wanted at the reception. Neither you or Simon cared for a big fancy wedding. You had already gotten your dream wedding with Mitch and Simon wanted to keep things lowkey. So you both agreed for a courthouse wedding then dinner at your favorite place.

“Proud of you,” Price told Simon as he patted his back. The two were drinking a beer as you talked to Laswell and Gaz.

“Thanks.”

“I know Johnny would’ve been happy for you too.”

“He would’ve enjoyed this,” Simon added.

“She’s a good woman, Simon. Make sure you keep her this time.”

“I will.”

“Hey. Um dad?” Levi asked Simon awkwardly. Levi still had conflicted feelings in called Simon dad after calling him Uncle Simon for so long. But he eventually accepted the fact that Simon was his biological father.

“Yeah kid?”

“Mom wants to know if you wanna do the cake now,” Levi asked.

“Tell her yes. We can do the cake,” Simon told his son. Levi nodded before going back to you.

Simon walked over to you before wrapping his arms around your waist. Your mom brought out the cake for you two before she took a couple pictures of you both and then with you two and the kids.

"To Mr. and Mrs. Riley. We wish you two nothing but happiness," John said as he raised his drink.

"Thank you all for being here with us," you say before you and Simon cut the cake for everyone.

After your reception, your parents took the kids to watch them over the weekend while you and Simon got to enjoy the honeymoon. Simon and you slow danced in the hotel's garden. The staff didn't want to interrupt you both as you both had a moment alone together.

"Thank you for giving me a second chance," Simon says to you.

"I'm surprised you waited for me."

"You're the only person I'd ever wait for."

"Do you think they're happy for us?" You asked Simon.

"Knowing them, I'm sure Mitch and Johnny would've wanted us happy and safe. No matter what," Simon tells you. You smiled softly up at him before giving him a gentle kiss.

You rested your head on him as you both continued to dance to the music from your phone.

[littlethingsinlife]

i'm sorry (happier part 2)

A/N: I was not expecting the amount of positive feedback for the first part and I was even more surprised to see people asking for a part 2! It was originally created to be a one-shot but a part 2 really fit well with how the first one ended. Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you again for all of the love and support! I hope you all enjoy. I also want to thank my friend, @tummymoth, they really helped me flush out and refine my rusty ass writing (also let me word vomit at them till midnight sometimes).

Pairing(s): Past Lo’ak x Omatikayan!Reader, Ao’nung x Omatikayan!Reader, Slight mentions of Lo’ak x Tsireya

Warnings: Lo'ak's POV, Swearing, Ao'nung saying something sus ONE time

More Info: My vision for this part 2 was to create a reply in Lo'ak's pov. So we'll have a look at what he experienced and thought process (not too sure if any of that made sense) but I was inspired by Joshua Bassett's song "i'm sorry" and it played constantly as I wrote this. Hopefully I was able to do right by my idea haha.

Summary: 7,547

Part 1: Happier

Key:

(Y/N) = Your Name 

Lyrics = Bolded Italics 

Flashbacks = Italics

Na'vi Words:

Yuey - beautiful (refers to a person) 

Skxawng - idiot/moron

Marui - Pods where the Na’vi live

Ilu - sea creature similar to dolphins

Ikran - dragon-like creature 

Tulkun - sentient creatures similar to whales

Olo’eyktan - clan leader/ chief

I thought about what I would say

But I’m two years too late

I can’t imagine how you’re doing these days, hmm

Sure, it wasn’t perfect back then

I’ll be first to admit

But it was better than being strangers again, oh

It had been a couple of months since my interactions with (Y/N) dwindled to terse smiles and barely audible greetings. If you asked me to point out the moment our friendship started to change, I couldn’t tell you. When did our bond start to break? When did it even start to crack? We used to talk every day about all the things we did and planned what pranks to pull on everyone, but now? Now, she barely looked in my direction. Now, she wouldn’t even give me the time of day. 

I couldn’t remember when it started, but I knew that it was somehow my fault I grew distant once we arrived in Awa'atlu. I guess I was just so fascinated by the new environment and people, I didn’t even realize a rift started to form between us in the first place, much less that it started to grow. 

The night before we left to find a new home, I held (Y/N) as she let out sobs filled with fear and anxiety. It broke my heart, but all I could do was hold her and let her cry until she was calm enough to tell me what was on her mind. 

“I-I am afraid, what if the sky people come to find us again? I cannot lose any of you; it would break me into a million pieces,” she sobbed. 

“If they find us then we will fight and we will win,” I reassured her, gently rocking her back and forth. 

“You are an idiot, I was so close to losing you, to losing Kiri, Tuk, how do you think it would make me feel to lose the most important people in my life?” she sniffled. My chest ached at how broken she sounded, but the only thing I could do was assure her and offer her more words of comfort as I held her in my arms. 

“I promise that I will be with you throughout the journey as will my family. We love you, and even if you do not believe it, you are a Sully. And you know what my dad always says.” 

“Sullys stick together,” we chorused.

That night, I cradled her in my arms until she fell asleep. 

Fuck, I completely broke my promise to her, how could I forget? Shaking my head, I tried to reason to myself, “Maybe she just needs time alone. I’m sure she’ll come running back soon once she realizes that it's no fun without me, her best friend.” I felt a small, unfamiliar feeling in the pit of my stomach. “Right?” 

I’m drunk too late talking to the moon

Writing songs I can’t sing to you, ‘cause

“Bah! Stop lying, I know you (Y/N). You would have fought alongside me and defended Kiri. You are not the same girl I knew in the forest back home,” I muttered, rolling my eyes and getting up to leave. Honestly, who did she think she was fooling? The skxawng had the balls to insult Kiri, and all she did was sit back and watch. She didn’t even make a move to help until it was to help him by pulling me off. “Talk to me when you’ve come back to your senses,” I called over my shoulder, refusing to look back. 

“Lo’ak! Bro—” a hand roughly grabbed my shoulder, jolting me out of my daze, “why’re you just staring off like that?” I whipped my head to see who the hell it was that was bothering me, only to be met with Neteyam.

“Did you have to grab me that hard?” I hissed before my initial anger gave way to a heavy feeling. “It's nothing, just—just lost in thought” I sighed, shrugging his hand off my shoulder. 

“Right, sure, nothing.” he crouched down beside me. “Don’t think you can lie to me lil bro, you’ve been spacing out more than you usually do. I didn’t even think it was possible to be more empty-headed than you already are,” he stated. 

“Wha—no I haven’t,” I tried to argue, but of course, he wasn’t convinced. 

“Can you stop arguing with me for once and just tell me what’s going on with you, you skxawng?” 

I scrunched my nose in distaste and inhaled sharply, “(Y/N) and I have been…  distant,” I admitted, turning to look at him. “She won’t even look at me. She either only answers me with one word or doesn’t answer at all.” 

He nodded, motioning for me to continue. 

“I—the last time we talked, I said things I didn’t mean. Things that just came out because I was so frustrated and… and angry. It was the heat of the moment and I—” 

“What did you say skxawng, did you hurt her?” Neteyam interrupted, face twisting to show the beginnings of distaste.

“No, no—” I sputtered and raised my hands to calm him before he could go on an hour-long lecture that I absolutely was not in the mood to hear. “At least I don’t think I did… I just wanted to ask her why the hell she was helping fish lips, that’s all—” 

“You didn’t answer me Lo’ak, what did you say to (Y/N)? I don’t care why you did it, I want to know what you said to elicit such a reaction from her.” By Eywa, if he would just give me a chance to get to the point—

“I—I told her that she was not the same girl that I knew back in the forest..." my ears lowered as the weight of what I said slowly sunk in. “And that she could talk to me once she came back to her senses,” I whispered, internally cringing at my harsh words.. 

“You fucking skxawng—” 

“Can you stop calling me that? I already know, you don’t need to keep repeating it…” I scoffed, looking out into the ocean. I’m good enough at beating myself up over the hundreds of times I’ve messed up in this lifetime, I didn’t need another disappointed set of eyes on me.

My ears twitched at the deep sigh he let out. “Look, I’m sorry that I keep calling you skxawng but that is exactly what you are for saying something so hurtful to your best friend of all people. The two of you were inseparable the moment you were born. Even if you don’t want to, suck up your dumbass pride,” my ears flattened again. It wasn’t pride, I’m not prideful. It—it was me needing (Y/N) on my side. We used to always be on the same page, and when she said I was wrong for wanting to defend Kiri against those assholes, it felt like she was siding with them instead of me, and—

Okay, so maybe it was pride.

  “Admit that you were wrong, and go talk to (Y/N),” Neteyam insisted as he put a reassuring arm around my shoulders, jostling me around to prove a point. “Your friendship is so much stronger and Eywa knows that a heat-of-the-moment argument isn’t going to break that. You should have more faith in her.” His gaze sharpened before he schooled his expression into something calmer. “Just talk to her, yeah?” 

“...Yeah,” I mumbled, swallowing down whatever argument was trying to bubble up from my throat and prying his arm off me. “You’re right. I’ll just clear things up with her and apologize. Everything will go back to normal after that, thanks bro—for listening,” I agreed. 

Ever since that day

The things I didn’t say They haunt me, oh

And I know that I’m to blame 

So, go ahead and 

Blame it on me, oh

Our lessons on the ways of the Metkayina were finished, so it was rare for the entire group to be in the same place. But every once in a while, we all finished our chores at the same time and found ourselves near the shore where we first learned to ride the ilu, and sat around a fire hours before eclipse, laughing and exchanging stories. 

The rarity of these moments made me cherish them that much more, but two people continued to miss our not-so-scheduled gatherings the past two moon cycles. How was it possible that they were the only two to keep missing our hangouts? Were they together? Fish lips had better not be doing anything to (Y/N) or so hel—

“(Y/N)! Ao’nung! You guys made it!” Rotxo laughed. 

“Yeah, yeah, quit shouting will you?” Ao’nung shot back as he sat down next to Rotxo, (Y/N) smiling softly as she followed. 

“So, what’ve you guys been up to? We haven’t seen you in what feels like ten moon cycles.” Neteyam questioned.

“Teyam, you saw me earlier today, you literally helped me feed our ikran,” (Y/N) joked. ‘Teyam? When did she start calling him by anything other than his given name?

Ao’nung swatted her side with his stupidly wide tail and swung an arm around her shoulder with a remarkably punchable smile on his face “More like he was trying to make sure you didn’t accidentally give them your fingers for breakfast. They would’ve gotten indigestion.”

“Haha very funny Ao’nung,” she drawled, “I would’ve fed you to Tekay instead, but she would’ve gagged the moment she caught a whiff of you,” she scoffed as she quickly pushed him away by the chest.

“Wait… Do they even have a gag reflex?” Fish lips didn’t budge, he just had a dumb look of confusion on his face.

“No, but they would defy the laws of biology to gag just for you,” she quipped, sticking out her tongue and moving to push him away again, but the skxawng had the nerve to pull her into a headlock. 

“Oh, yuey, the ikran won’t be the only ones gagging on me tonight,” he argued with a smirk. 

Did I want to punch that smirk off his face? Did I want to gag? Both? Before I could make a decision, (Y/N) grimaced, pushing him away again and smacking him upside the head. 

“That’s actually repulsive. You’re disgusting.”

“Dude, keep it in your pants, her family is right there,” Rotxo laughed, doubled over as he struggled to catch his breath.

“Yeah, we’re right here,” I interjected with a smile—wanting to join in on the jokes that were being thrown around—but it was hard to keep my face from falling when I saw (Y/N)’s bright expression falter. 

“Anyway, what were you guys talking about before Ao’nung and I arrived?” she asked in a too-bright tone of voice she only used when she desperately wanted to change the subject. As if everyone came to an unspoken agreement to forget about the conversation before, one by one they all started talking about who they thought would win in a fight—Toruk Makto, or our Olo’eyktan, Tonowari. 

The sound of laughter and excited chatter faded as I replayed the previous conversation in my head. When did they start joking around like that? Why the hell did fish lips call her yuey like it was the most natural thing in the world? How come she smiled so easily with him but faltered when she sees me? She was probably smiling with him right now—

I looked over at her, a pit in my stomach already forming at the idea of her smiling at him, but she looked so distant, so withdrawn from everything around her. Before I could even blink, she put a delicate hand on Ao’nung’s arm to grab his attention and mumbled something in a hushed tone. After a few beats of silent conversation, Ao’nung nodded and gave her a look of understanding. 

Why did he look at her like that? How much time did they spend together to be able to understand each other with just a look? How much time have I wasted breaking my promise to her while she grew closer to someone else? 

 Standing up, I made up my mind that I would talk to her and clear up any miscommunication. There was no way in hell I was about to let fish lips ruin our childhood friendship. Before I could even get close, Neteyam pulled me aside. 

“Bro, why’re you glaring at everyone?” he asked with concern written all over his face.

“Glaring?” I tilted my head in confusion. “I’m not glaring, this is just my face.” 

“No, no.” He shook his head. “I’m your brother, I know your face. Whatever look you’ve been throwing at Ao’nung and (Y/N)? You may as well have been throwing knives at them.”

Behind Neteyam, I could see (Y/N) get up to bid everyone good night and slowly walk in our direction. This was my chance, I just needed this overbearing idiot to leave me alone. 

“Whatever look you think I’m giving to them, you’re wrong,” I denied. “Can you not act like this right now?” My tail flicked side to side impatiently, an obvious twinge of annoyance clear in my tone. I licked my lips nervously as I could hear footsteps coming closer. Leaning slightly to the side, I looked behind Neteyam to see (Y/N) and—

Ao’nung? What? Why is he there? 

“Good night,” (Y/N) muttered, not sparing us a glance as she walked past. I followed her every move and—as if everything slowed down—my eyes narrowed as they found Ao’nung’s hand placed on her lower back, leading her gently in the direction of the marui. 

I know that I’m too late

But I’ll say it anyway

I’m sorry 

I’m sorry 

I’m sorry 

Though it's far too late

“I did it! Did you see that Reya?” I shouted—out of breath—as I showed off the shell Tsireya threw. 

“Yes, yes you did it!” She exclaimed, excitedly wrapping her hand around mine. For someone who spent so much time underwater, her hand radiated so much warmth. So easy to hold. My heart swelled with pride as she continued to compliment me. “You’ve improved so much!”

“Yeah? Well, I had a great teacher,” I joked, nudging her softly with my shoulder. It wasn’t just her hands that were warm either, she just seemed to radiate it.

“Oh stop, you flatter me too much,” she denied, fidgeting with her hair. Was that a blush on her face? “C’mon, why don’t we catch up with the others? Private lessons are officially done for the day,” she announced as she led me to shore. Oh Eywa, she looked so pretty like this, with her hair flowing down her back and the way her eyes cast down when she became flustered. And her smile, it was a smile that could knock the air out of my lungs.

While we walked onto shore, we joked around and laughed with each other, talking about anything and everything. The ease of each reply and joke came as smoothly as gliding through the water on an ilu—as easy as breathing. Laughing at another one of Tsireya’s jokes, my eyes scanned the village as we approached it. Families were winding down for the day as they cooked dinner, although I didn’t see mine anywhere nearby aside from Kiri. 

My smile slowly dropped when I was able to make out Kiri looking frantically around as if she was searching for someone. Tsireya and I made our way to her, worry filling the pit in my stomach. As we got closer, I could see Ao’nung climb down one of the roots of the Mangrove trees and make a beeline toward her. My eyes stayed on both of them, making sure that fish lips didn’t do anything to Kiri. 

Ears twitching I was able to make out the words, “(Y/N)? Did you find her? ” from Kiri as they were carried on the wind toward us.

“Yeah I did, I was able to get her to eat, but she’s not looking too good,” Ao’nung replied with concern lacing his voice.

Brows furrowing, I pulled Ao’nung by the shoulder. “What do you mean she’s not looking good? Where is she? What did you do?” 

“What the hell do you mean? I didn’t do shit, freak.” I rolled my eyes at the insult. He couldn’t use that thick head of his to think of anything else to call me? From the pained look on his face, I could tell that my grip on his shoulder had too much pressure. Good. Served him right.

Before Ao’nung and I could continue our argument Kiri groaned, “Will the both of you skxawng shut up! I’ll go talk to her.” My eyes followed her retreating form as she went to talk to (Y/N)—tail lashing back and forth in agitation all the while—before turning back to Ao’nung.

Who the hell did he think he was? I’d beat his skxawng ass if he hurt (Y/N) in any way. He had no right to look so damn worried. They weren’t even close. What even happened? How long had she been missing for Kiri to go to fish lips of all people for help? Should I follow Kiri? Why didn’t (Y/N) come to me? She always came to me, and if she came to me now, I absolutely would have listened. Why—

“Lo’ak? Hey, are you okay? Lo’ak?” a hand softly placed itself on my arm. Closing my eyes in frustration, I sighed. 

“Yeah, perfectly fine.” 

Damn it, was that when it started? How idiotic and blind have I been that I didn’t even notice that her trust in me started to slip and die when it was right in front of me? Why didn’t I go to her and make sure she was okay? I should’ve punched that idiot’s lights out—

“Ao’nung! Stop pulling me you skxawng, you’re walking too fast, slow down!” a hushed voice chastised. 

“C’mon yuey, we only have about an hour before eclipse, we have to hurry!” His voice grated against my ears as he responded. 

“That’s plenty of time!” (Y/N) insisted. I could hear the laughter bubbling up in her voice as she chased after him. “Please Ao’nung slow down, I can’t keep up.” 

“It can’t be helped, you’re so short—” a whack could be heard. “Ow!”

“I’m as tall as Tsireya, you giant!” 

“Both you and my sister are short—Ow! Alright, just because you did that, you leave me no choice,” Ao’nung said, throwing (Y/N) over his shoulder with a laugh. 

The bickering voices got closer, and my eyes narrowed at the way he held her. My breath hitched as he whispered something in her ear that made her ears perk up and her eyes widen. What the hell was he saying to her? Before I could spring up from my spot, Ao’nung tossed (Y/N) in the water, her yelp quickly interrupted by the sound of her body hitting the water. 

I stayed in my spot as shock zipped through my body. Letting out a breath I didn’t know I held, her head popped out of the water, a playful glare on her face. 

“I told you, you left me no choice,” he stated, guffawing at her expression.

“Oh yeah?” she groused, spitting out seawater as she wrung out her hair. “Well fuck you too. Help me out of here?” 

“Only if you say the magic word,” he taunted, crossing his arms with a smirk. “Otherwise, I’m afraid my hands are tied.”

“Please, oh great son of our Olo’eyktan, help me out of the ocean,” she beckoned dramatically, sarcasm dripping from every word while she rolled her eyes. “It’s about time you recognized my proud lineage, forest dweller,”  he said as his chest puffed out with a hand reaching towards (Y/N). And there was that stupid smile on his face.

(Y/N) rolled her eyes, a mischievous smile spreading across her face as she reached for his hand, making sure to tug with enough force to unceremoniously yank him into the water. 

“So much for the son of a great warrior! Your instincts are shit!”

“My instincts are dull you say?” he questioned as his head popped up next to her. “We’ll see about that!” 

“Wha—AHHH—'' she wheezed. “No, please Ao’nung stop! That tickles!” Her arms flailed wildly in an attempt to free herself from his grasp. 

What the fuck.

  My ears flattened at an angle as I tried to process the scene unfolding before me. When did she start laughing with him? That should’ve been me she was laughing with. Not him, not the skxawng who had been nothing but rude to us since we arrived. What… what was I even saying—Fuck I didn’t know anymore. Why did I feel like this every time I saw them together… laughing and making jokes like we used to?

And it was me, it wasn’t you

It’s cliche, but it’s true 

I wasn’t thinking how I usually do, oh

And is your momma doing well? 

Or does she still hate me? 

But it was hard to watch me put you through hell 

I’m drunk, too late, talking to the moon, ooh

Writing songs I can’t sing to you, ‘cause 

Two weeks had passed since I started noticing the changes in (Y/N)’s relationship—friendship?—with Ao’nung. It was like every time I blinked, I could see her laughing loudly as Ao’nung tickled her with a triumphant smile on his stupid face. Since that day, I had been trying to find a way to talk to (Y/N), but she was never alone. She was always with him and when she wasn’t, she disappeared and I couldn’t find her no matter how hard I looked. 

Now here I was, wandering around trying to look for her as I rehearsed what I wanted to tell her. 

Where could she be? Dinner was in an hour and she wasn’t anywhere near our marui. I had to find her soon so there would be enough time for us to talk. I had to tell her that I miss her, that I was sorry for being so dumb, that I shouldn’t have let my pride blind me, and that I didn’t mean any of the things I said. 

There was only one place I hadn’t looked yet… hopefully she was there. 

As I was getting closer to the root Kiri stalked to, I could see two silhouettes beside each other. An all-too-familiar feeling bloomed in my chest once I registered that she was there with him. 

Her melodic laughter made my steps falter. I clenched my fists tightly, contemplating if I should go over there and pull her away, force her to talk to me, to listen. But I couldn’t, I couldn’t do that to her, not when she looked so content, so happy. 

Ever since that day 

The things I didn’t say 

They haunt me, oh

I know that I’m to blame 

So, go ahead and 

Blame it on me, oh

“Lo’ak? You said you were going to look for (Y/N) and never came back. She’s already in the marui helping mom cook,” Kiri stated, a twinge of annoyance lacing her voice. “Hey, are you listening?” She shook my arm slightly, making me jump out of my stupor. 

“Yeah, sorry, you said dinner was ready?” I asked as I stared off. 

The sand beside me crunched softly as Kiri made a move to sit beside me. “No, I said that (Y/N) is with mom helping her cook. Where is your head at?” she asked as she tilted her head to try and meet my gaze. “Are you alright?” The annoyance in her voice shifted to concern. 

“I’m fine, yep—just… fine,” I brushed her off, hoisting myself up to head towards Mom and Dad for dinner before Kiri yanked me back down. 

“Lo’ak, don’t pretend you’re okay when you’re not. Tell me what’s going on,” she urged. “Maybe I can help you with whatever it is that’s occupied your mind lately.”

I inhaled sharply, debating if I should tell her what had been muddying my mind, the reason why I had been so spaced out, why I had been glaring daggers at fish lips each time I saw his stupid face next to (Y/N)—how confused I was. 

“Stop with the thinking skxawng, you might hurt yourself,” she admonished. “Just tell me. It’s not like I can’t handle it.” 

Huffing, I rolled my eyes and turned away from her to look at the sea. I hadn't even said anything yet and Kiri was already making me feel idiotic. How was I supposed to tell her what's been going on like this? Maybe if I kept quiet for long enough, she would get tired of waiting for me to start talking and go on to eat dinner without me. 

A couple of minutes of silence passed. 

I could still feel her staring at me.

“I’ve—I’ve been conflicted,” I started, tongue feeling heavy in my mouth as I continued to stare at the shoreline. “I don’t know what I’m feeling.”

“What do you mean?” Kiri nudged my shoulder with hers. “Elaborate a little more, I can’t help if you don’t tell me the reason why you’re feeling confused.” 

“...Whenever I see (Y/N) with Ao’nung, it’s as if I can feel my heart aching,” I said, motioning toward my chest to prove my point. “There’s always a… a surge of anger that rushes through me. All I want to do is pull her away from him so then everything can go back to the way things used to be—for us to be okay.”

“Lo’ak…” If I was looking at her, I’d probably see Kiri tilt her head with sympathy. But sympathy isn’t what I needed right now.

“I want her to look at me and smile, to laugh with me, hug me—but now, whenever I get close to her, she’s next to him, laughing with him, cracking the jokes we would make to each other… I just—” I rubbed at my face in frustration. It wasn’t as if the words were hard to come by—I had spent so much time bottling them up that it was hard to stop talking. No, I just hated the fact that I felt this way in the first place. “I don’t understand why seeing them makes me feel like my heart is about to explode—why it makes me want to scream. It hurts.” 

“Lo’ak” she put a hand on my shoulder. “Are you—are you in love with (Y/N)?”

Love?

I sputtered in surprise and whipped my head toward Kiri to see if she was joking or not. What kind of a sick question was that? I wasn’t in the mood for any games. 

“What? No, she’s like my… sister?”

She rolled her eyes and sighed. “If you’re not, then why does seeing her with Ao’nung hurt you so much? Why do you care as much as you do?” 

“I shouldn’t!” I wrenched my shoulder away from her hand and stood up. The need to move around and do something—anything—was too much. There was too much energy thrumming right beneath my skin to sit still anymore. 

“That’s the problem! After everything I said to her, done to her? I don’t have the right to say I’m in love with her. She’s my childhood friend, Kiri. That’s all our relationship has ever been… I just—” I paused in thought and tried to calm down. “I didn’t realize seeing her have so much fun with someone else would make me feel so, so hollow—” 

“Let me ask you something, you have to promise to be completely honest with me, okay?”

I nodded, not even looking in her direction. 

“When (Y/N) tried to pull you off from Ao’nung that one fight months ago, what did you feel? Angry? Betrayed? Jealous?”

Jealous? Did she really think I was sulking for months because of such a petty feeling? I’m not a jealous person. I never have been. 

“Seeing her jump in to get me off him made me feel like she was siding with him and telling me that I was wrong. Her actions were clear as day to me, Kiri.” I started to pace around. “She was protecting him—caring for him when she should’ve been next to me, helping and supporting me. When she did that—I felt like the only person that’s ever been on my side—” I croaked and turned my head to look at Kiri as tears stung my eyes “The only person who didn’t see everything I did as some sort of disappointment or failure, abandoned me and chose someone else.”

“...”

“I know that I could’ve approached her a different way but how could I when I felt so broken?” I inhaled sharply, eyebrows furrowed. “ It’s all fish lips’ fault. If he wasn’t such an asshole, none of this would have happened, and (Y/N) and I would still be the same, she would still be by my side—supporting me, loving me.” 

“Why do you keep blaming it on Ao’nung?”

“Because it is his fault that things have turned out the way it has.” I threw my hands up, exasperated. What wasn’t Kiri getting? “He’s getting in between my relationship—er—friendship with (Y/N)! If he wasn’t there I would be able to talk to her and tell her I’m sorry, but she’s always with him—”

“Stop! Are you hearing yourself?” She nudged at my foot to interrupt and scoffed. “You’re unbelievable, you know that? (Y/N) told me what you said to her, how ‘she wasn’t the same girl’ you knew back in the forest. Do you know what happened when you told her that? Do you know how much pain she was in?”

Pain? I snorted, turning towards Kiri. “Now I know what you’re saying is bullshit. You know how (Y/N) is—if she really was pissed at me she would’ve come to me instead of running to someone else.”

“She wasn’t pissed. She cried because of you, Lo’ak. Because of what you said.” I stopped dead in my tracks to look at her. Kiri's eyes didn’t waver. Another heavy feeling settled on my chest and clawed its way up my throat. If you had asked me what it was, I wouldn’t have been able to tell you. Was I sad? Guilty? Angry? Was I jealous like she said?

I settled on anger.

“If you’re saying what I think you’re saying—”

“The person that found her that night, the one who comforted her? That was Ao’nung. He held her in his arms as she sobbed when I found them.” She stood up too, forcing me to stop pacing. 

“The last thing I want to hear about right now is him, Kiri. What the fuck—”

“Did you ever think about why she’s so comfortable with him now? Why they’re so close? While you ignored her for weeks, he made sure she was okay—made sure she ate every day. He didn’t leave her side until she finished,” Kiri pointed out, and before I could even think to open my mouth to remind her how shitty he was to her especially, she cut me off. “Yes, he was an asshole at the beginning, and yes he has a screwed-up way to show he cares, but he stepped up when you fucked up.” She poked my chest with a glare before she continued. 

“Oh, so I’m a fuck-up now?” I asked wryly. 

“You can’t put all the blame on someone that took care of your best friend. Stop being so blinded by your pride and hatred and see that you’re the real reason why your relationship with (Y/N) isn’t the same as it used to be.” 

My heart sank a little more as I scrambled for something to say. “How could you say that—”

“No, you do not get to interrupt me right now, Lo’ak.” Her eyes flashed with something closer to anger than annoyance. When was the last time I saw her angry? “Listen and listen well. When we couldn’t find (Y/N) and we were looking for her everywhere—he was the one that found her spot, the one she isolated herself to so she could cry alone, and no one would see how much pain she was in. And what were you doing in the meantime?” 

My ears flattened at her rising tone, and I was finally beginning to understand the weight stuck in my throat and chest. Not anger, not even jealousy.

“You were out there with Tsireya, stuck in your own little world.”

It was my fault.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m really happy that you found her but you can’t have both of them. You can’t be that selfish. From (Y/N)’s perspective, you’ve already chosen the one you want.”

“It’s not like I’ve actually chosen anyone yet,” I tried to interject, but all the fight had left my voice as Kiri’s words dug into my skin and sunk in.

“Don’t you dare play with either of their feelings. (Y/N) held so much love for you in her heart, she allowed herself to break to the point of no repair because she didn’t want to show you how much it hurt her to see you at your happiest with Tsireya.” She paused before continuing, her voice losing its edge. “Let her move on, brother. And if it’s Ao’nung that makes her light up the way she used to, then you suck it up and let him. He was there when your pride wouldn’t even let you apologize or even look in her direction. Actually think about how she feels for once.” 

I hated the fact that there wasn’t anything I could say to prove her wrong. 

“It’s all I’ve been thinking about nowadays,” I muttered.

I know that I’m too late

But I’ll say it anyway 

I’m sorry 

I’m sorry, hmm

I’m sorry 

Though it’s far too late 

“I thought I was already doing that,” a faint voice huffed in annoyance. Turning the corner, I saw Ao’nung and (Y/N) standing on the beach together— far too close for my liking. 

“You were, but you got sloppy. Here, you have to move your hips like this,” he said as he corrected her posture. My ears flattened against my head as he put a hand on her hip and gently directed her movement.

Why did he look so gentle with her?

“Ao’nung,” (Y/N)’s voice rang out, clear as crystal despite her uncertain tone. “Are you sure you should be teaching me this? This is a traditional Metkayina dance, right? I’m…” she hesitated, her voice becoming smaller. “I’m not Metkayina—” 

“Yet.” He interrupted, holding her face in his hands. “You are not Metkayina yet. Once you become one of us, you will have to learn the dance to celebrate the return of our spirit brothers and sisters, so why not learn that now?” I hated how reassuring his voice was. The thought of how either of their eyes looked as they held contact made my stomach turn.

“Yeah… you’re right,” she mumbled with an unsure look on her face.

“Woah, hey pretty girl, look at me,” he insisted, laying his hands on her shoulders and bending his neck so they were at eye level. “I’m serious when I say you will become Metkayina one day, so don’t worry yourself over it right now. Okay?” Ao’nung tilted his head to the side, an unbelievably soft expression on his face. “You have me here to help you.”

“Alright…” (Y/N) mumbled, not convinced. 

“If you don’t get rid of that look on your face I’ll throw you into the water,” he said as his face shifted from sincerity to something mischievous. “Or worse… I’ll tickle you,” he threatened.

“You better not Ao’nung, or I swear to the Great Mother herself I will hu—AHH—get away, you skxawng!'' She laughed as she tried to run away, but Ao’nung grabbed hold of her waist and pulled her into his arms. And despite her words of protest, it was clear as day that she was leaning into him while they scuffled on the sand. 

“No!” she shrieked with glee. “You can’t make me go in there again!”

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that, forest dweller!”

A thought occurred. Should I go up to them? We never got the chance to talk, after all. I took a few steps in their direction before freezing. When was the last time I heard her laugh like that? She had the biggest smile on her face, and the one who made that happen wasn’t me—it was him. 

And if you ever hear this 

I hope you know that 

I’m not proud of who I’ve been, ooh

And if I see you again

I hope you know that 

I wish you nothing but the best

And my biggest regret

The afternoon was quiet, relative silence only interrupted by the crashing of waves. Without much to do, I just sat in our marui and lazed around with Tuk until a horn blew. 

“The tulkun have returned! Everybody—our brothers and sisters have returned!” Tsireya’s voice rang out, and when I poked my head out to see what the fuss was about, I saw the megawatt smile on her face, as she swam by on her ilu. 

The village came to life as everyone mounted either ilu or canoe to make their way to the tulkun. From here, I could see little more than a large group of dark shapes making their way through the water. Payakan himself was dauntingly huge, but to see a whole pod of them show up like this? It was spectacular. I watched the commotion unfold from one of the walkways, lost in thought before I felt water splashing at my feet. 

“Come on Lo’ak! Don’t just stand there, let’s go see the tulkun together!” Tsireya urged, still smiling. Shaken out of my stupor, I grinned widely—diving into the water and clambering onto her ilu. lu may be lithe animals, but I could still feel sinuous muscle under velvety skin as it made adjustments in the water to keep balance. 

“I’ll come, but only if you’re offering a ride,” I joked, gently holding her waist and playfully leaning onto her. The cool water around us made her skin feel that much warmer. It was nice. 

Before I could see her reaction—I would’ve bet anything at that moment that her cheeks had become flushed—we began to quickly make our way toward the rest of the clan and the giant tulkun. 

The air around me vibrated with the excitement and happiness of loved ones returning, and Tsireya was no exception—the speed of the ilu gave away her eagerness to be with her spirit sister. As we leaped into and out of the water, Tsireya’s laughter was carried by the wind and reached my ears. That, and the answering whoops and bellows of Metkayina and tulkun alike, was almost contagious enough to get carried away by the energy surrounding us. 

“My spirit sister is down there,” she said as she dismounted, sliding off her ilu and into the water. “Wait here, yeah?” she smiled at me before diving down.  

I was more than happy to watch the Na’vi around me. Looking around, I was in awe of the sheer amount of tulkun gathered in one area, and how each Metkayina was able to identify their spirit sisters or brothers so easily. Looking down into the shifting waters, I saw Tsireya catching up with her spirit sister, waving her hands around and swimming through the water alongside her.

All around, I could hear people telling stories and the deep, booming calls of the tulkun as they responded with tales of their own. New parents were showing their babies and calves, and as my eyes scanned the horizon, I could see small children holding onto the tulkun’s fins as they were lifted to the glittering ocean surface.  

Not too far away, I heard the sound of a body hitting the water and the sound of grating, but familiar laughter along with an indignant (Y/N) sputtering. 

“Ao’nung, what the fu—” 

“Hey, hey, relax! It’s just some water. There are children here, yuey,” Ao’nung chided with a shit-eating grin on his face. 

“The parents of those children are going to have to explain what it means to return to Eywa once I’m through with you,” she retorted, treading water and becoming even more unamused when he raised his hands in mock surrender. 

“Woah there pretty girl, you’re talking to the son of the mightiest warrior in all of Pandora—”

“That’s funny, I don’t see Neteyam here,” she interjected, pretending to search the waters around them before turning back to Ao’nung and tilting her head, “do you?”

“Just because you said that you can have fun finding your own way back to shore,” he said as he turned his ilu around.

“Oh, c’mon Ao’nung, don’t be like that,” she rolled her eyes and reached a hand towards him. “You’d really leave me here to fend for myself?”

He turned and wagged a disapproving finger at her, “I’ll consider forgiving you if you say word-for-word that I’m the son of the mightiest warrior in all of Pandora. I can’t have you slandering my father’s name, yuey.” She groaned and leaned back into the water. 

“You couldn’t pay me enough to say that load of bull—”

“Nope!” he didn’t give her a chance to defile the ears of any nearby children and crossed his arms. “I wanna hear you say it.”

“...”

“I’m still waiting.”

With a sardonic smile, she finally caved. “Why don’t I do you one better? You’re the mightiest warrior to exist since the time of the First Songs,” she declared, sarcasm dripping from every word as she slapped at the water for emphasis. 

“That’s what I thought, was that so hard?” Even if I wasn’t able to see them, I still would have been able to hear the stupidly wide smile that made its way across his face.

“Don’t be such a big baby and let me meet your spirit brother!” 

“Just because he’s here to visit today, I’ll let that one slide for now.” Ao’nung rolled his eyes, dismounting his ilu to join (Y/N). “Now hold on tight and hold your breath like how we practiced.”

We? Who the fuck was we? Why was he allowing her to meet his spirit brother? Why were they looking at each other like that?

I watched both of their silhouettes submerge and breathed deeply, forcing my thundering heart to calm as I slowly sank my head into the water. At first, all I could see were blobs floating around in the water, but once my eyes adjusted, I could see the fluid movement of Ao’nung talking to his spirit brother. Eyebrows furrowing, I swam a little closer and hoped that I would be able to see what was being signed. With each movement made, it was clear that Ao’nung was translating the clicks and bellows of the tulkun to (Y/N), and whatever was being said made her smile widen by the second. 

I couldn’t watch anymore as my chest burned from the lack of air and I resurfaced to catch my breath. For once, I was thankful for the lack of lung capacity I had. I climbed back onto Tsireya’s ilu. Seeing as she wasn’t back yet, I sat back and leaned on its neck to face the sky.

Did she always glow like that when she smiled? Whenever she was with him—she always looked so happy, so vibrant. Would she have looked like that with me by her side if I didn’t push her away? If I was there for her like I had promised? I wanted to tell her sorry—that I was sorry for taking our friendship for granted, for making her go through it alone. I wish that it didn’t take seeing her smile and laugh with someone else to make me realize how I felt.

I willed my tears to go away. 

Is this how she felt? Seeing me with Tsireya? Great Mother… I was truly horrible, wasn’t I? I wished things turned out differently. Maybe in another universe, I did talk to her—realized sooner, made her happier—but now? Right now, my heart was torn in two, watching as someone else picked up the pieces of the heart I crushed. No amount of words could fix what we used to have, and even though I wanted to whisk her away, tell her I love her—that I see her—that seeing her with him made my skin crawl, I knew I couldn’t. I was no longer worthy to be part of her life, because of me and my actions alone. 

I had become nothing but a stranger. 

Ever since that day 

The things I didn’t say 

They haunt me

I know that I’m to blame

So go ahead and 

Blame it on me, ooh

I know that I’m too late 

But I’ll say it anyway

I’m sorry

I’m sorry 

Hmm, I’m sorry 

Oh-oh-oh-oh, I’m sorry

Taglist: @midnightliacr @immortalbloodhuntress @arminsfloll @whenercolorfulrainbowlol @dakotali @lexilander27 @zatarias-pandora @vanillawhale @kazupop @owaowaowawa @sopiasleeps @siabhshjsjsjsjshznzn @jimfiqs @ihave500hubbiez

[symp4nat]

𝕞 𝕒 𝕤 𝕥 𝕖 𝕣 𝕝 𝕚 𝕤 𝕥

Started: 01.07.24

Last Updated: 08.18.24

Total Works: 39

яισя∂αиνєяѕє - ρєя¢у נα¢кѕσи, нєяσєѕ σf σℓумρυѕ

Imagines/Oneshots

Clarisse La Rue

Deep Questions?

Training

ChatGPT wrote me a fic.

"Even Aphrodite envies you."

Bad Day

"More beautiful than..."

Crayons

Luscious Curls

"I'm not yours!"

No Pictures

Reyna Ramirez-Arellano

Annabeth Chase

Woodlands

Piper McLean

Smut

Clarisse La Rue

Reyna Ramirez-Arellano

A little extra help

Annabeth Chase

Piper McLean

Series

Clarisse La Rue

Unexpected Love (1.1)

Gentleman (1.2)

Nails (2.1)

Reyna Ramirez-Arellano

Sleepy sleepy Praetor

Annabeth Chase

Piper McLean

Other

Clarisse La Rue

Hcs1

Hcs2

Hcs3

Reyna Ramirez-Arellano

Annabeth Chase

Piper McLean

мαяνєℓ ¢ιиємαтι¢ υиινєяѕє

Imagines/Oneshots

Natasha Romanoff

Kate Bishop

Kamala Khan

Yelena Belova

Daisy Johnson

Melinda May

Crush

Smut

Natasha Romanoff

Kate Bishop

Kamala Khan

Yelena Belova

Daisy Johnson

Melinda May

Series

Natasha Romanoff

Kate Bishop

Kamala Khan

Yelena Belova

Daisy Johnson

Melinda May

Other

Natasha Romanoff

Kate Bishop

Kamala Khan

Yelena Belova

Daisy Johnson

Melinda May

O T H E R

Chloe Charming

Headcanons p1

Headcanons p2

Homework Help

"Nervous baby"

¢єℓєвяιтιєѕ

Imagines/Oneshots

Taylor Swift

"Don't... I swear.."

Hailee Steinfeld

Scarlett Johansson

Dior Goodjohn

Jealous Baby

Post Workout Nap

Muscles

Selena Gomez

Joshua Bassett

Olivia Rodrigo

Dylan Conrique

Chandler Kinney

Zendaya

Smut

Taylor Swift

Hailee Steinfeld

Scarlett Johansson

Selena Gomez

Joshua Bassett

Olivia Rodrigo

Dylan Conrique

Chandler Kinney

Zendaya

Series

Taylor Swift

Hailee Steinfeld

Scarlett Johansson

Dior Goodjohn

"What are we?" 1.1

Selena Gomez

Joshua Bassett

Olivia Rodrigo

Dylan Conrique

Chandler Kinney

Zendaya

Other

Taylor Swift

Hailee Steinfeld

Scarlett Johansson

Dior Goodjohn

Headcanons :)

Headcanons pt 2

Headcanons pt 3.

Headcanons pt4

Headcanons pt5

Headcanons pt6

Birthday Headcanons

Snapchat Posts pt1.

Snapchat Posts pt2

Snapchat Posts pt3

Selena Gomez

Joshua Bassett

Olivia Rodrigo

Dylan Conrique

Chandler Kinney

Zendaya

[thatgirlstrawberry]

💛Sunshine💛 - The Escape

In which you all read about Spencer’s family life.

Warnings: angst, cursing, blood, pregnancy trouble, crying lmk if I missed anything!

Spencer Reid x fem!oc

Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop. Drip. Drop.

"Mom, mom, wake up."

Audrey groaned, her eyes squeezing them tighter shut than they already were. She figured she must of passed out from the blood loss.

She felt her body shake wildly with hands in her arms. "Mom, please wake up!"

"Charlie?" She mumbled, her breaths shallow.

Her vision was blurry as she squinted. "Yeah, it's Charlie. Mom, come on, you need to wake up now." A figure of her oldest son was knelt in front of her.

"Char, did her wound open back up?" This was a new voice but it was oddly familiar.

Audrey felt her shirt being lifted up. "No, no." Charlie answered. "You did a good job, Emmy."

"My mom's a doctor." The girl, Emmy, sighed.

Audrey's eyes opened all the way and she let out a quiet groan. "Char..." She whispered. "M-Marcus? Where is he?"

She asked, trying to sit up. Charlie gently help her up and she leaned back against the cold stone wall behind her. "I don't know. He left hours ago."

Audrey looked around the room.

Nothing. No identifiers, no windows. Just a door on the far wall and a light fixture on the ceiling.

It almost looked like a laundry room in the basement of an apartment building. Only there were no machines.

She saw Emmy sitting with her knees to her chest. She looked dehydrated, starved.

God, this poor girl.

“Emmy, sweetheart, are you okay?" Audrey asked, reaching for her. The girl crawled forward and held her hand.

"I'm okay, Mrs. Reid." She nodded, trying to smile.

Audrey felt tears fill her eyes. "I'm- so glad you're alive." She nodded. "I'm so sorry that my brother did this to you."

Emmy pressed her lips into a thin line and shook her head. "It's not your fault." She looked down at Audrey's stomach. "You're pregnant?"

Audrey nodded and glanced down at her stomach. "Peach." She smiled weakly.

"You lost a lot of blood." Charlie told her. "That's why you passed out and then uncle Marcus made Emmy stitch your wound."

The woman's eyebrows furrowed. "But I don't understand- he wants me dead so why stitch me up?" She asked.

Charlie glanced at the ground. "He said he had a bigger plan. A better one."

Audrey bit her lips and looked around, shivering. "Mom, are you cold?" Charlie asked softly, touching her arm. "It's gotta be at least 80 degrees in here."

The woman swallowed. "I... I haven't taken my medicine in over 24 hours." She spoke lowly. Emmy tilted her head, taking off the cardigan she was wearing. She crawled forward and wrapped it around Audrey's shoulders.

"Thank you, sweetie." She smiled a little. She looked around the room before speaking again. "Do you know if Marcus locked that door?" She asked.

Charlie nodded. "Yeah. He doesn't leave without locking it."

"How often does he come back?" She asked, her eyes darting around the room.

Emmy cleared her throat. "Every two hours." She nodded. "I started counting when on the second month I was here."

Audrey tilted her head to the side. "I'm gonna get you out of here, honey. I promise."

Now that Audrey was here, she could get under his skin. She's known the kid since he was born, surly she could get him distracted so Emmy and Charlie could get the hell out of there.

"Okay." She nodded and shut her eyes. "Okay, when he comes back in, I'm gonna distract him and I need you two to go. I need you to run, do you understand?"

Charlie scoffed. "W- mom, no." He shook his head. "I'm not leaving you. I can't."

Audrey smiled a little. "Baby, I'll be okay." She nodded, her eyes filling with tears. "I need you to go and figure out where I am so you can get your dad here."

Charlie continued to shake his head but stayed silent. She looked to Emmy. "Have you been anywhere except for this room?"

Emmy sighed. "When he was taking me down here. I think I can remember which way to go."

Audrey nodded, her heart aching for this poor girl. Charlie still shook his head. "Mom, I don't wanna leave you."

The woman smiled, biting her lip. "I know. I need you two to get out of here and you won't make it far with me."

The boy sighed and looked down at the ground. She watched Emmy scoot closer to him and wrap her arm around his back, her thumb moving back and forth soothingly.

They sat there in silence until they heard a noise coming from beyond the door. She widened her eyes and waved her hand at Charlie. "Go, act like you're asleep." She nodded towards the other side of the room. "When I say uh... white— get up and go. Make it fast and silent."

They scurried over and collapsed on the ground. Audrey pulled her knees to her chest and sucked in a breath when she felt a sharp pain in her belly. She shut her eyes and let her head hang down.

The door opened.

"Shit, Audrey." She heard her brother's voice. "You're making me change plans." He shook his head and walked over to her slowly, kneeling in front of her. Audrey slowly lifted her head, a glare already on her face. "I was gonna kill you at the house but now... I want to make a show out of it."

The woman scoffed. "So you can get the attention you claim to have been deprived of?" She asked, her eyebrows popping up a bit.

Marcus chuckled and shook his head, looking over at Emmy and Charlie who seemed to be sleeping. "Say something like that to me again and I'm slitting little Charlie's throat." He looked back at her with a straight face.

"You will not hurt my fucking child or I swear to God—"

Marcus grabbed her chin and interrupted her. "Enough with the threats, Aud." He said, taking something out of his pocket. "Because I have the knife..." He clicked something on the small thing he took out of his pocket and the tip of it touched her throat. "And you do not."

Her eyes fluttered and she glanced at Charlie who's eyes peeked open. She bit the inside of her cheek. "So what's your plan, Marcus?"

He scoffed. "I want money, I want media coverage and I want people to hurt."

Audrey shut her eyes. "Listen to me." She whispered. "Let them go, Marky." She bit her lip. "Please. Take me. I will stay willingly but you have to let them go." Her voice broke.

Marcus threw the knife down and pressed his hands against the side of his head, squeezing his eyes shut. "You don't get it, Audrey. I can't just l-let them go!" He screamed.

Audrey's lips quivered and she hesitated to reach up and grab the sides of his face. "Marcus..." Her voice was quiet. She glanced over his shoulder at the wide open door. "You can't just tell white lies for the rest of your life. You have to turn yourself in. You'll get all of the media coverage you could ever want."

She glanced at the knife as she heard their bodies start shuffling. Marcus furrowed his eyebrows and pulled his head away from his sister.

"Hey!" He screamed. Charlie and Emmy were running towards the open door.

Audrey's eyes widened when she realized that he saw them. "No!" She shouted as she got up from the ground. She grabbed the knife next to her feet and did the only thing she could think of.

She pushed the knife through his side and scrambled away from him as he cried out in pain.

She saw Charlie and Emmy looking back at her and she scrambled off of the floor. "Go! Go! Go!" Her voice came out strangled. "I'm right behind you!" She called.

She ran towards the door as they disappeared. "Audrey!" Marcus raged. "Get the fuck back here!"

She looked back at her brother one last time before running out of the room and shutting the door behind her.

She ran in the direction she saw the kids go. "Char!? Emmy, where are you guys!?"

“Mom! Up the stairs!" Charlie called back. She noticed as she ran that the walls of... whatever this was were stone.

She saw the stairs and her chest heaved. Another sharp pain in her belly made her cry out and stop running. She clutched the bottom of her stomach and inhaled.

Audrey heard slow footsteps behind her and she whimpered, beginning to climb the stairs. "Char!?" She called again.

"Mom, hurry! The gate is closing!"

The gate? She grunted, feeling her legs burn as she ran faster and faster.

"Emmy, go! Run, Emmy go!" She heard her son scream.

She saw the end of the stairs ahead and started to run faster. Her eyes watered and her lungs burned.

She made it to the top.

She stopped and looked around and saw Charlie in front of some gate that was indeed closing. She pressed her lips together and started running again. She saw Charlie get between the gate and it's doc, pushing it back.

"Come on, mom! You're almost there!"

She saw Emmy already past the gate, on her knees in the... sand? It was sand. What the fuck.

Soon, she was there. She as right there with Charlie and he pulled her through, both of them collapsing in the hot sand.

Her chest heaved and she pulled Charlie into her, squeezing him tight. "We're okay, baby." She cried. "We're gonna get out of here, okay?"

Charlie sobbed into his mother's shoulder before pulling away. He looked at Emmy who was rocking back and forth. She was crying and smiling.

"Hey." Audrey and Charlie sat up. "We gotta go. Come on."

They got up from the ground and walking over to Emmy. "Come on, sweetie." She whispered, touching her arm.

Emmy looked up at her, tears rolling down her cheeks. "O-okay. I get to go home?" She asked.

Audrey smiled. "Yeah, sweetheart. Come on. Come on, we're gonna get home."

Charlie pulled Emmy from the ground and they began walking. It looked as if they were in some sort of huge garage.

The door in front of them was huge and wooden. "Come on, we're almost there." Charlie wrapped his arm around Emmy and grabbed his mother's hand.

His lips turned up in a smile as they reached the wooden door. Audrey walked forward and bit the inside of her cheek, looking for a way to open it. She couldn’t seem to find a handle or a button.

“It’s gotta be here— it has to be.”

“Mom?” Charlie spoke.

Audrey shook her head. “No, wait. There’s some way to open—“

“Mom—“

“No, Char we have to open it—“

“Mrs. Reid!” Emmy shouted. Audrey paused and turned around to face her.

She furrowed her eyebrows. “What?”

Emmy glanced down at the bottom of her dress with a scared look. “You’re uh… you’re bleeding.”

Audrey’s heart dropped when she looked down, seeing the blood pooling on the fabric of her dress. It wasn’t from her stab wound.

Her stomach pain increased and she looked back up at Emmy and Charlie.

“Mom, are you okay?”

His voice seemed to echo in her ears until the only thing she could hear was her own heartbeat.

——————————————

AHHHHHHHHH EMMY IS ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEE

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS CHAPTER :)

I know this had no Spencer in it but the next one will

Edit: I keep forgetting to add the taglist lol

Taglist: @mrsgweasley

@tuesday-yellowxx

@blue-willows

@monzarella

@winkev1

@criminallymagic

@mermateyepmatewithte

@lipstixstain

@urlovelydarling

@dreatine

@f-me-reid

@fantastic-fans

@aleyda5

@thatsonezesty13

@creativeuser101

@d0ntfeedaftermidnight

@jacksonms31

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@rintheemolion

@abbygraceasd

@buckyyyismahhlife

Love you bunches ❤️❤️❤️

[perfectlywrongformend3s]

Album-Joshua Bassett

(not my gif)

A/n: Thank you so much for requesting, sorry that I'm just getting to write this. 

Requested: Hii, can u write an imagine where josh is all stressed out and Y/n takes care of him?

PS I loveeeee and adore ur work

thankss 

-Samantha 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your POV

I was lying on one of the couches that was in the studio. Josh was recording his first ever album and I couldn't have been more proud of him. I heard the sound of paws hitting the ground so I looked over and saw Woody. I gently moved my left hand closer to the ground to give him some attention while we waited for Josh. 

" That was fantastic Josh." The producer said 

I looked over to the producer then to Josh who was sitting in the booth. Just by his expressions I could tell he was having a hard time. I got up and motioned to Tanner who was also with us that I was going to check on him. He nodded and informed the producer they should take a five minute break. 

Once I got the okay to walk in the booth I didn't waste another second. I gently pushed the door open. 

"Baby..." I whispered softly while walking over to him

He looked up and I could tell he was tired from the long studio days. I gently pulled him into my arms which resulted in his head resting on my chest. 

" Try not to stress yourself out baby." I whispered while gently running my hands through his hair. I heard him take a deep breath, but didn't make a move to leave the comfort of my arms just yet. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He moved out of my arms still taking small deep breaths to calm his stress level. " Maybe you should call it a day." I softly suggested while rubbing his back some

" I can't just stop, I have a deadline Y/n." He said 

I pulled my hand back to my side. " Josh, I'm not asking you to stop, I'm telling you to take a break. You've been in the studio for over two weeks now. You need rest, you're exhausted." I softly explained 

" I will when I get this song down." He said stubbornly 

I sighed, " Joshua, come on. Your voice needs a break. Just let me take you back to the apartment so you can rest." I said 

" I can't okay, you don't get it cause you're not a singer. It needs to be perfect so please let me be." He said annoyed and put his headphones back on.

I know he was stressed and it shouldn't hurt, but it does. I just left the booth and walked back to the couch and blocked out the studio with my headphones. 

Joshua's POV

Right after those words left my mouth I felt bad. I wanted to go out of the booth and comfort her, but I know she would rather have some time to calm down just like me because of my stress level. I went back to trying to figure out the song and how to make it better, but my mind kept wandering to the beautiful girl on the other side of the glass. 

" Hey, um can we pick this back up tomorrow?" I asked through the mic

" Yea, it's not a problem go get some rest man." my producer said 

I nodded and stood up and left the booth which made Woody run over to me. " Hey buddy." I softly said and gave his ear a couple good scratches. I then walked over to the couch. 

"Y/n/n..." I softly said 

She just gave me a glance. I sighed and got to her level.

" Can you look at me please." I asked 

I knew she was ignoring me, which I don't blame her because from her point of view it most likely hurt her feelings. I place one of my hands on her arm. " Hey babe." I said 

She looked over and I could tell by her eyes that was hurt. I frowned and said low enough so we were the only ones that could hear. 

" I'm sorry, can we head to the apartment?" 

She sighed but nodded, so we packed some stuff then said goodbyes and I picked Woody up. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your POV

I stepped out of the bathroom drying my hair with a towel. " Can we please talk now?" Josh said 

I looked over to him and nodded. I walked over and sat down. " Josh, I was just trying to help." I whispered 

He sighed and nodded, " I know and what I said I didn't mean it. Believe me please." he said 

I just looked over to him. " Still doesn't mean you should have said it." I whispered 

" I know and I'll keep apologizing. It's just this is my first album. I'm terrified no ones gonna like it and-" I immediately cut him off right there. " Baby....Don't do that. Your songs are amazing and if one likes them, then screw them. I'll be your biggest fan." I reassured 

He smiled. " You really mean that." 

" I wouldn't lie to you." I whispered 

He pulled me into a sweet soft kiss. " I love you." he whispered into the kiss

I smiled as well, " I love you more." 

He pulled away some, "Impossible." 

I let out a small chuckle making him smile more. He kissed me once again knowing that I would support him no matter what comes our way. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I really hope you like this one. Once again sorry for getting this out so so late. Thank you guys for the love and support. This one is a little shorter but once again I still hope you enjoy it. 

-Samantha

[columbo-of-narnia]

I t honk Joshua Bassett deserves to be motorboated. They’re at least a handful each. I think he’d laugh. He has a nice laugh.

He deserves a nice motorboading as a treat. Rpr him and me. Sometimes, i like to imagine he has a very sensitive chest that i can use to tease and playfully torture. And strictly for science, i need to see him do jumping jacks shirtless

And his laugh honestly brightens my day.