#Joe Willis imagine

[darknessisafriend]

Time for NSFW alphabet request! you can request any Joaquin's character ! any letter, several or all of them!

(starting to wrok on Commodus already 🤫🤫)

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

B = Body Part (Their favorite body part of theirs and also their partners)

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum, basically)

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying)

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment? Romantic or rough/dirty.)

J = Jack off (Do they masturbate and how often)

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

N = No (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? Like to try new things etc.)

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

T = Toys (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

U = Unfair (How much they like to tease)

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

W = Wild Card (A random headcanon for the character)

X = X-ray (Let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Z = Zzz (How quickly they fall asleep afterward)

[tawneybel]

Note: Request rules.

Imagine your lover Coach Willis requesting you wear a sheer, white t-shirt to school.

“What? You  want me to go bra-less while I’m at it?”

“That’d be great.”

He suggested wearing something buttoned or zippered over it, so you could discreetly high beam him… throughout the day. You were a little too demure to do something like that. At least while in a secret relationship. But you compromise by way of a dark brassiere under the sheer, white t-shirt. Underneath a cardigan. Allowing modest glimpses at the right angles.

It’s not enough. Later, when it’s just the two of you, Coach seems to be thirsting harder than usual. Not that you’d ever complain.

Getting caught would put a damper on-

Greedy hands slid your shirt up. “Hey!”

“Take your bra,” he huffed, “off. Or do I need to do it for you?”

“Yes, sir.”

Hopefully, this wouldn’t be like the time you got so wet, your arousal ran down your leg. Past your skirt. But Coach Willis insisted he needed easy access. At the beginning of the affair, you promised to be “always available.”

So you stood there, brassiere joining your neatly folded cardigan on an office desk. His tongue darted over his lips.

My eyes are up here.

Whenever he got that look, you knew your teats were going to be pampered. You started to raise your shirt again while the coach took a swig of water.

“No.”

“No?”

Before you could react, he emptied the bottle on your chest. Uncomfortably cool liquid completely soaked through the cloth. Further hardening your nipples.

“Um, didn’t know you were a fan of wet t-shirt contests, sir.” Your giggling was muffled by his hand. What? Ow!

Joe Willis’s wasn’t suckling so much as slurping, apathetic as to whether his teeth scraped your soft skin, or not. I may as well be topless, you thought, not daring to uncover your mouth.

What’s gotten into you, Coach?

[alecsv]

[rickallensbarefeet]

Okay since it's officially spooky season I gotta raise an important question to yall. If Def Leppard were universal monsters what do u think they'd be

[joeyfranchise]

𝟙𝟚 𝕕𝕒𝕪𝕤 𝕠𝕗 𝕗𝕚𝕔-𝕞𝕒𝕤: 𝕕𝕒𝕪 𝕗𝕠𝕦𝕣

a star on top…

boyfriend!joe x fem!reader

summary: joe helps you put up your christmas decorations… and a star on top completes all the scenery ;)

warnings: nsfw mdni!!! kinda sweet smutty fluff, riding, p in v (wrap yo willy!!), lots of kissing and cheesiness

word count: 2k.

note: ALAS! i made it in time. if it sucks i’m sorry. i listened to a nonsense christmas by sabrina carpenter, music for a sushi restaurant and santa baby by ariana grande & liz gillies while writing 🤍 (please appreciate the spongebob joke in the summary hehe)

you’d think six boxes full of christmas decorations would be enough for just two people. joe dragged them out of storage one by one so you could go through them and arrange them how you wanted, but here you were elbows deep in the fourth box while you chatted to him about more stuff you needed.

he wasn’t mad, not by any means, he actually found it cute how much you loved to decorate… but jeez. did anyone need this much stuff? anyone in the world?

“i realllllly need them joe!” you exaggerated, earning a sarcastic eyeroll from him. “they’re flocked nutcrackers! and they come in white, pink, red, black… and i even saw a disco ball nutcracker, and…”

joe crossed the room quickly and silenced your ranting with a kiss. “bub, i promise, this weekend we’ll go find the nutcrackers, okay? for now, let’s decorate with what we do have.”

you looked up at him with big, puppy dog eyes. he was right, you needed to use what you had. “sorry for sounding like a spoiled brat.” you apologized, looking down at your decorations in defeat. joe chuckled at your reaction.

you continued pulling things out of the boxes, there was an endless amount of garland and strings of lights. you set aside the garland and lights for the banister of the stairway, the set that went outside, and the final set that went across the mantle. joe finally began digging inside a box, pulling out a bunch of tiny christmas houses and store-fronts wrapped in newspaper.

it was a village set that once belonged to your mother, but now belonged to you. you quietly reminisced on hours you’d spend with your sister imagining tiny people living in the christmas village, what they did for work and how they spent their life. you two always had the wildest imagination. a smile crept across your face as you watched joe unwrap them and place them in the exact order you liked. to be loved is to be known.

you took a box to the kitchen next, getting out all of your christmas themed hand towels to set aside for washing, and placing all of your kitchen trinkets in their designated areas. joe finished with the village and started working on decorating the banister. the sight of him decorating was enough to make you feel emotional, you didn’t ask or expect him to help.

he always just did it.

you kept your eyes trained on him, watching as he worked. he wrapped the garland and lights so carefully before plugging them in to admire them. you smiled at him as walked down the stairs, happy with how it turned out. “looks great, babe!” you assure him as he pulls you in for a sweet hug. he kisses your forehead before looking around the kitchen at all the things you’d placed around.

there was a mischievous glint in his eye as he looked at your favorite cookie plate that sat empty in the corner of the counter. “soooo…. you gonna bake some cookies for us?” he asked teasingly, tickling at your sides gently with his fingertips.

“mhm. what kind do you want?”

“chocolate chip, chocolate brownie… maybe some of those chai cookies you made a few weeks ago. and something pumpkin if you can?”

“you got it, babe!” you replied. you pulled him down for a sweet kiss, resting your arms around his shoulders as his hands found your hips. joe pulled away after a minute.

“i’m gonna finish up on the garland and lights, that way when you’re done we can do the christmas tree together.” he said, grabbing another set and heading to the porch to wrap them around the rails just like he did inside.

you finished placing your decorations around the kitchen and you put a few in the guest bathroom too just to feel extra festive. you always enjoyed changing the toothbrush holders to holiday themed ones, and changing out your throw blankets for the holidays, you could go on… being festive was something you were insanely good at.

joe always helped you decorate, even though he sometimes had a grinchy reputation. you watched him finish up outside through the window, and when he came back in the tip of his nose was red. he pulled his beanie down a bit farther over his red ears and you chuckled.

you didn’t let him get too far in the door before jumping into his arms, and he held you close to suck up some of your warmth. you placed a gentle kiss to the tip of his nose, then to the corners of his eyes, and then to both cheeks. joe smiled up at you.

he let you down gently and walked over to the giant box that sat in the corner. he opened it up and began taking out the christmas tree pieces and you grabbed the base, opening it up and placing it where you wanted it to go. one by one you pieced the tree together.

it took a while to fluff the tree, but since you were both working on it, it took a lot less longer than you expected. joe helped you wrap the silver-white lights around it carefully, and then you hung silver and gold ornaments all around it.

you stepped back and admired your work, shimmying and doing a little happy dance as you took in all the decorations around you. everything was perfect, and aside from a few treat-related things, you were essentially done decorating.

joe reached his hand into the final box and pulled out the last decoration, the tree topper. it was a glittery silver star. you suddenly remembered the height of the tree. last year joe had to finish decorating it, and you weren’t sure how he got the star up there.

“you need me to get you a step stool?” you asked him, already turning to head for the garage. “nah,” he responded quickly. “come back, i have a better idea.”

you walked over to him slowly, recognizing that mischievous glint in his eye. “joey…” you start, your eyes widening. he crouches down in front of you, smirk pulling across his face. “get on my shoulders.”

“hell no! what if i fall?” you ask incredulously. you couldn’t believe he was suggesting this… but then again, yes you could. “get on, it’ll be quick. you just have to put the star on!”

you roll your eyes at him. “fine. but if i get hurt then i’m gonna be really mad. and if i die i’m haunting you.”

“i’m looking forward to that.” he jokes, laughing as you gently kick his shin. “what? then you’d be able to see my every move. and watch me when i’m naked. ghost perv.”

you laugh incredibly loud at his joke before throwing your leg over and sitting on his shoulders. suddenly, you felt like a kid again, riding on someone’s shoulders on a hot summer day. you weren’t surprised joe could carry your weight, of course he could. you were more worried about your coordination and afraid you’d topple the tree over almost instantly.

joe handed you the tree topper as he stood, his hands holding a firm grip on your thighs. he walked forward slowly until he was directly in front of the tree, and you leaned over and placed the topper on with ease. you were happy that it went so well, because you were honestly scared shitless. joe backed up a bit and crouched again so you could hop off his shoulders.

you did another victory dance, giddy at how beautiful your decorations looked. joe scooped you up into his arms quickly, laughing into your neck as he began to press kisses to your column.

“you’re so cute.” he said with mirth, walking over to the couch and plopping down with you on his lap. you grabbed his face and pressed your lips to his, kissing him lazily as his hands slipped under your sweater and roamed over the expanse of your back. the sounds of your smacking lips and laboured breaths filled the room as your kisses drew deeper and deeper.

you began to grind your hips into joe’s subconsciously, and joe moaned into your kisses as his length hardened against you. the friction of your movements felt so good even though there were layers of clothes between you, and you moaned back against his lips just as fervently. joe began pulling your sweater over your head and you let him, gasping as the cool air hit your naked skin. you weren’t wearing a bra and the chill of the room hardened your buds almost instantly, but joe didn’t care. he began kissing at your chest, his tongue rolling over one of your nipples while his large hands grasped at the other.

you tilted your head back, moaning as joe continued his ministrations on you, and you pressed your hips into his roughly. joe pulled you closer to him, moving his kisses from your chest to your neck again before nibbling on your ear. “let’s take this to the bedroom.” you whispered, looking down at him.

he shook his head no before lifting you up and sitting you on the couch next to him. “let’s do it right here, i don’t wanna wait. plus i love the way the christmas lights look on your skin.”

you blushed at his comment and watched as he pulled his pants and boxers down his legs. his cock sprang free, the tip was angry and red. you leaned over and took him in your mouth, bobbing your head up and down a few times to get him wet enough to slide into you. joe fisted the couch pillows in his grip as you hollowed your cheeks.

you pulled off him with a loud pop and quickly shimmied out of your shorts before throwing your legs back over his and hovering over his cock. he used his thumb to push himself forward and you sank down onto his length slowly, taking a few moments to adjust. while joe sat fully sheathed inside of you he began kissing you again, his hand finding their way into your hair as he held you close.

the intimacy of the moment ran a shiver through you.

you finally lifted yourself up slightly before quickly moving back down, beginning to ride him at a tantalizingly slow pace. joe hissed at your teasing but you kept going, moving to your own liking.

his hands found your hips and they gripped you firmly but he made no attempt to push you to go faster, he wanted you to enjoy this too. you continued your slow, soft, steady movements as joe let out quiet moans beneath you.

your legs started to feel a bit weak but you pushed through, yet joe sensed your uncomfortability. he finally began moving his hips upward, pressing his tip right into your sweet spot as his thumb gently rubbed circles into your clit. you gasped suddenly, the feeling of your orgasm finally taking over.

warmth spread throughout your body as you shook slightly above joe, and seconds later he came too, resting his forehead against your shoulder as he spilled into you. neither of you were quick to make a move. joe looked up at you and giggled and you tilted your head wondering what was funny.

as if he read your mind, he gave you an answer to his amusement. “guess you were my star on top.” he said with a wink. you pretended to gag at his cheesy joke before kissing him again, raking your nails through his hair.

“i guess we should shower.” he said softly, looking into your eyes and waiting for an answer. you nodded slowly, pulling off of him. he carried you to the shower before turning on the hot stream.

“after this we can have hot chocolate and watch a movie. plus, you owe me cookies.” he joked, leaning down to kiss your forehead.

“yeah, and you owe me flocked nutcrackers.”

photos and dividers used are not mine. all cred to owners.

taglist: @slimshiesty @starsinthesky5 @kykysinlovewithafairytale @burrowdarling @bengals-barnesbabe @joeyb1989 @loveyatopluto @toterry @unhingedfangirl @superheroprincess22 @burreauxsworld @definitelynotdomanique @samanthamark5 @superstarshitblog @fa1ry03 @wickedfun9 @xbriexx @venic-bxtch @burrowdarling @angels555 @idbe-theman @yelenasbraid @ladyluvduv @joeburrowshaircurl @joeybisbootiful @livinobx @blairsworld22 @jarring-behavior @joeyburrrow @yomamaslays4lyfe

[isa-loves-you]

Telling People, You're a couple. | The Group Chat Head canons | Pt.2

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Soft willy- you and nick have been dating for almost 2 months now. It's still crazy to you that you have this man, I mean come one look at him he is the definition of what everyone wants to be or be with. respectful, good height, nice built, the funniest person you have ever met, sweet and caring nick was all these things; which is why you were kinda scared of telling people you were a couple.

It's not like you were the most horrible person to look at but you in your mind you just thought you were okay nothing special just your average joe, but to nick you were the most beautiful person he'd ever met so of course he wanted to show everyone how special he is to have you in his life. Ever since you guys started dating he's been trying to get your approval to tell his fans but you still felt a little anxious on the idea so nicked eventually stopped asking to respect your decision. 

One day you and nick were at a burger place eating lunch talking about his new album. “I don't know what I really want for the cover but I was kinda thinking if you would be able to pose for it?” Nick said looking hopeful at you “Nick I don't know, what if people connect the dots? I'm already on most of the tracks. It would be weird if I am also on the cover.”. He had to admit it would be kinda obvious but that was the whole point, he was happy that you were there to help accomplish the album and it would just be even more awesome if he got to see your face on the front of it all

“Here your refill sir” the waitress interrupted yours and nick conversation with a smile “oh thanks” “if you need anything, and i mean anything else just let me know” the waitress was basically eye fucking nick while saying her little beg of attention from nick. This mad you fucking livid like who  does she think she is talking to a random man like this and in front of his girlfriend out of all people.

“Thanks but i'm good” Nick let out an uncomfortable laugh while trying not to look at her anymore. You had to admit this girl was pretty but you were definitely better looking than her and that's all you needed in the moment to make a decision that went against your words. “You know what?I will pose for the cover "what do i have to hide” for the rest of the day. Nick couldn't stop thanking you and asking if you were sure about this but you already agreed and can't go back on it now.

Two weeks later you and Nick were drinking and  trying to think of all the different types of ways to take pictures. Since the songs on the album were based off of video games more specifically the games you could only play on the Nintendo DS you came up with  the idea of taking them on a DS. After three hours  later you and Nick finally captured the right picture to put on the album.

A couple of days passed, and Nick had posted the cover as a promotion which was the picture of you on a DS with a bold light blue font that read “Digital Dreams”. 

(This is sorta what I was going for. obvious if you don't like it you can totally imagine something else. Also credit to whoever these beautiful people are , I am jealous.)

In the caption of the post Nick had credited all the people who worked on the album including you but did it a completely different way. “I also want to thank my amazing partner for helping me throughout the process and even being on the album front and in the song @ ur username  i love you.”

You were surprised at the amount of people who were so supportive of you guys, of course there were some people who weren't, but you couldn't care. You were just happy that Nick was happy.

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Larry-  you were getting some food for you and Larry because he said he hasn't eaten all day. You and Larry have been dating for almost a month and it was the best thing that has happened to you in a while. Everyday with him was so much fun and the group was accepting of you for dating their friend.

You had gotten him and you something small because Nick and Tanner wanted you and Larry to go with them to dinner later but since Larry didn't eat you just grabbed something while you were out so he wouldn't be so hungry later. You had stepped into the house looking for Larry but he was in his room doing the podcast with the others.

You knocked on his door which he called out for you to open “dude you didn't have to do that thank you so much” “no problem it wasn't a bother to me”. You walked up to his desk to set the food down “hi everyone” you waved to all of the boys in the call which they waved back. 

You stood there for a couple more minutes talking to them before you left to go be on your phone and leave them back with their work. Almost 45 minutes later Nick, Larry, and Tanner came out so you guys could go to dinner and have a fun night out. 

You woke up the next morning in Larry's bed since you didn't want to drive home  last night. You see Larry at his desk looking at the podcast comments, you walk up to him and put a hand on his shoulder “so do they love me” you let out a small laugh. “They love you alright, it seems like they love you more than me” “well in that case switch me jobs, i would love to make dumb jokes all day “. you guys shared a laugh and a few more while looking at the comments. You were glad that the people who loved him were happy that he was with you.

[thenightling]

Willy Wonka misconceptions

As Charlie and the Chocolate Factory / Willy Wonka has become weirdly popular lately because of the successful prequel film and most recently that really botched / rip-off Wonka event in Glasgow Scotland, it felt like a good time for this post.

Here are a list of popular misconceptions about the book and films.

1. Much of the Internet thinks of Wonka as a "Serial killer of children." I pointed out that at the end of the 2006 film and novel you see the children alive, though altered. And in the 1971 film that version of Wonka says that they will all be fine, but a little wiser. Someone tried to argue with me that he was just trying to placate Charlie. Really!? Since when did that Wonka ever lie to make people feel better?

Based on his previous behavior we have no reason to believe Wonka would lie just to make Charlie feel better. It's just a dark, edgy, annoying headcanon to pretend Wonka killed those other kids when every version tells you they survived.

____________________________

2. Grandpa Joe was not "Faking it" or "being lazy." It seems ironic to me that so many rant and even get genuinely angry about the character Grandpa Joe. It is especially odd to me when the rage is in regard to the depiction in the 1971 film, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory.

The reason it is odd to me is because in the 1971 film Grandpa Joe very clearly was suffering through severe depression, possibly a long bipolar depression phase.

The depression is clear in his "I've got a golden Ticket" song.

"I never thought my life could be Anything but catastrophe"

"I never had a chance to shine Never a happy song to sing"

It seems weird to me that today people shame characters like Cinderella for not being assertive and empowered when she's a live-long abuse victim. And then you have the people against Disney's The Little Mermaid who say she gave up who and what she is for a man but ignore that she had a song number from before she ever saw Eric, where she expressed body dysphoria and made clear she wanted to be human even then.

And you have a large part of the Internet shaming Grampa Joe for being "lazy" and "faking being sick' while he's literally telling us that he he's been in a severe depression.

It's almost like watching a generation that supposedly respects mental illness and understands depression in ways previous generations didn't... suddenly having a justification to shame someone for having all the symptoms of clinical depression.

Hell, even the song "I've got a Golden Ticket" kind of indicates Grandpa Joe is entering a manic phase. If Grandpa Joe's illness is psychological why do we treat it as not-real? I get so annoyed at how many people mock the character or act like he's a con artist exploiting Charlie.

________________________

3. The Oompa Loompas were not slaves.

It's true that the earliest depictions of the Oompa Loompas were little African people (before the novel was revised) but in all versions he tells the kids that he pays them in coca-beans. That might sound like he pays them in fallen acorns he found in his garden but it's made clear that to Oompa Loompas, in their society, coca-beans are worth more than gold.

Try to imagine you got a job working for aliens who offer to pay you in large bars of gold if you just help him make some gold jewelry. But because gold isn't worth THAT much to these aliens they think you're a pathetic slave, even though Lofty (the Oompa Loompa from the new Wonka movie) probably now has a palace on Loompa Land that he uses as a summer house.

Interesting bit of trivia: Charlie was originally going to be black.

___________________________

4. Wonka (2023) is NOT a remake. A lot of people mistakenly think this is yet another remake. No. It's a musical prequel to the Gene Wilder Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory movie from 1971. ________________________

5. Lots of fans have "figured out" that the shoe shine boy Wonka sees early in Wonka is Charlie. One small problem with that. This is twenty-something Willy Wonka. Wonka was supposed to be pushing fifty or sixty when he went looking for an heir. The timeline wouldn't work. The director has confirmed that for this reason the shoe shine boy is NOT Charlie Bucket.

And there you go. A list of popular Wonka misconceptions debunked.

[ripempezardexerox]

Dices Merzbow, yo digo Justin Beiber

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Dices cLOUDDEAD, yo opino que te calles

Dices Muslimgauze, ¡¡ YO GRITO POP!!

Dices Kaoru Abe, y te parto la madre

El 92% de la juventud está escuchando Avant Garde Noise. Si eres parte de ese 8% que aun escucha música de verdad, comparte este post a tus contactos de facebook.

¡¡¡¡ No dejes que el espíritu del POP muera !!!!

[hey-august]

Story Idea: Willy Wonka, but Bugg-ify it

Captain Buggy and the Pirate Ship. Probably best as an AU.

On the back of 5 Buggy bounty posters are invitations to tour the famed captain’s ship. Maybe to show off his status, or to gain new recruits.

There’s the risk of the Marines finding out, but it’s a gamble he’s willing to take. It seems like the chatter and excitement about finding one of the select bounty posters stays under the radar.

The day comes and there are 5 individuals waiting at the pick-up location. All adults, we don’t need a Grandpa Joe here.

The first is someone who’s obsessed with pirates but their severe lack of skill (or interest) prevents them from finishing the tour. Perhaps they can’t hold their liquor.

Second is a self-absorbed competitive individual who runs into trouble with carnival attractions and also doesn’t finish the tour. Getting stuck in aerial silks or sawed in half could do that to ya.

The aloof bougie rich visitor is third and wants to buy Richie the lion, who doesn’t take kindly to the idea of leaving home. Richie makes sure they don’t continue with the tour.

The fourth visitor was lured by rumors of innovative technical creations. A new type of sail transponder? Cannons that could be used for transportation? Who knows what’s hiding on Buggy’s ship, or which dangerous invention prevents this person from completing the tour.

The final visitor… They were the only one truly interested in seeing the ship without ulterior motives. Not that Buggy or his crew believed that to be true. But when they gave back the Muggy Ball handed out as a reward for finding an invite and making it to the ship, Buggy began to think otherwise.

This would be fun either with all sorts of other OP characters, or OCs / reader-insert.

You know that the 5th visitor would be Shanks. 

But if the 5th visitor was an OC or a reader-insert, I imagine that Buggy and crew thought they were a Marine in disguise. Something about the way the person moved and spoke gave off that vibe. In the end, it turns out they were raised in a family of Marines, but didn’t follow that career path. And maybe, just maybe, they were interested in the pirate life.

[eddieydewr]

imo it's very ironic that a show made for the marginalised kids and is very anti bullying has so many bullies who are marginalising the exact communities they claim to support.

what are ur thoughts on this?

i agree! people like them only watch the show, and “participate” in the fandom to bully and criticise, is because a lot of the cast are visually appealing. for them, it’s usually millie, finn, sadie, natalia, and joe keery.

their mindset is like this -> mlvn MUST ‘make love’ in s5 bc they need to be able to see fillee ~doing it too for their edits (and more) • they don’t want to see anything between joyce and hop bc they are hags (even though they are attractive people, especially winona) • st@ncy MUST be endgame bc they are pretty people and rich. impoverished jonathan who? • people who ship henderhop are LIARS and only claim to ship them so el doesn’t get in the way of byler (definitely nothing to do with being unable to see dustin/gaten in a relationship due to ableism. duzie don’t count, sorry. they don’t have a physical scene together so they’re easy to ship or disregard lol) • dirty and smelly trailer trash eddie munson is ugly and cringe because their fans are embarrassing the fandom (???) with their devil horns while being fat, ugly, poor, jobless, etc., just like their fav! but they (and non ST viewers) have warmed up to joseph quinn because he’s attractive and is making it in hollywood • and will! just like eddie, he is too obsessed with dnd, is chronically bitchless even though he canonically pulls girls without trying despite the fact he’s into men (and mike). like all the shitty CW shows they watch, will will die a very homophobic death or end up loveless and lonely like a f@g! homophobically. while mike and el get married in the village with the 3 waterfalls and have a son named willy in disgraced memory of some guy they knew once, idk. not to mention he’s portrayed by… drum roll pls… the zionist! gasp. imagine if byler happens and gamze’s precious baby finn has to put his lips on that (insert antisemitic and homophobic slur here) MAN.

it just doesn’t bear thinking about! it’ll be hellfire (heh) if things don’t go their way. they are normal, unlike us!!

conclusion: ST is a mid CW show with pretty actors and they watch it on a surface level to fulfil their flvn desires, with their fingers crossed that ugly will schnapp, wait no, noah byers?? gets pwned BIG TIME! and die horribly. it’s what he deserves for spoiling the El Show; they want to see el do her Scream and Save the Day thing again, while mike is dumbstruck by her powers and thus hero worship, due to his own feelings of inferiority; because of his dwindling mental health and being unable to admit that he feels something for his best friend but is lowkey aware of his attraction to men (eddie) and the fact that he felt like he died too when he saw will’s “body” in the quarry too corny? and steve… ah steve, we like steve! with his bouffant hair, and his outrageous levi’s clad ass. while getting beat half to death as a running gag. someone give him an MRI pls.

ps. it doesn’t matter what we watch the show for, but the people we’re discussing, i feel like they’re not getting it. which is fine ig. but that doesn’t excuse their behaviour in the fandom, they don’t even enjoy fandom and think we’re just delulu, breaking THEIR LAW if we ignore canon, whether it’s actually canon or not, lmao.

[princesssarisa]

Character ask: Willy Wonka (any version)

These answers apply to every adaptation – that I know, anyway – of the story of Charlie/Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, as well as the original book and its sequel Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator. I haven't seen Wonka yet.

Favorite thing about them: He's a fun character all around. I love his creative genius, with all the fantastical candies and treats he creates and all the fantastical rooms in his factory. I love his blend of weirdness, cleverness, mischief, and passion for his work. His hints of moral grayness and insanity make him interesting, but his underlying warmth and kindness, especially to Charlie, prevent him from seeming like a villain. (At least I don't think so: more on that below.) He's like an eccentric wizard from a fantasy story, but with a more modern, candy-themed twist.

Least favorite thing about them:

Original book: The whole story of how the Oompa Loompas came to work for him has unfortunate implications. Even after Dahl revised the text and changed the Oompa Loompas from black African Pygmies to light-skinned dwarfs from Loompaland, the concept is still very iffy. A businessman "importing" a tribe of people from a foreign country to work in his factory, where he never lets them leave the premises, pays them in food instead of in money, and tests his experimental foods and drinks on them, which sometimes cause them bodily harm... it wouldn't fly in a book written today.

1971 film: To a sensitive child viewer (as I was), his angry outburst at Charlie and Grandpa Joe for stealing the Fizzy Lifting Drinks is scary and mean, even if it is just a test.

2005 film: I don't like the subplot about his controlling dentist father. A character like Wonka doesn't need daddy issues to explain him.

Three things I have in common with them:

*I love chocolate.

*I'm at least a little eccentric.

*I often wear purple.

Three things I don't have in common with them:

*I'm not a chocolatier, an inventor, or a factory-owner.

*I'm female.

*I've never met an Oompa Loompa.

Favorite line:

Original book:

(Explaining why he won't let Augustus be cooked into fudge): Because the taste would be terrible. Just imagine it! Augustus-flavored chocolate-coated Gloop! No one would buy it."

"Whipped cream isn't whipped cream at all unless it's been whipped with whips! Just as a poached egg isn't a poached egg unless it's been stolen from the woods in the dead of night!"

And the full text of his "There's no earthly way of knowing" poem and the funny, creepy poems he recites in the Space Hotel to scare the White House in the sequel.

1971 film:

"We have so much time and so little to see!... Wait a minute! Strike that. Reverse it." (and the later variation with "...so little to do")

"A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men."

"But Charlie, don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he always wanted... He lived happily ever after."

And of course his various quotes from Shakespeare, Oscar Wilde, and other literature.

brOTP: The Oompa Loompas, and Charlie by the end.

OTP: None, he's happily single.

nOTP: Charlie or any of the other kids.

Random headcanon:

*In all versions, he's on the autism spectrum – it just manifests in different ways for each different Wonka.

*In the 1971 film, he's Jewish, just like Gene Wilder was in real life (and like Timothée Chalamet, for that matter). Maybe this is true in other versions too. I chiefly like to imagine this as a "take that" to Roald Dahl's antisemitism.

Unpopular opinion: The popular "Wonka is a villain" take is overdone. Yes, he has some moral ambiguity to him, but he's not evil. People often seem to forget that the fates of Augustus, Violet, Veruca, and Mike aren't "punishments" that he deals out. They're accidents that each child causes himself or herself by ignoring his warnings. Now, I don't mind it when adaptations imply that he deliberately sets up those accidents to occur if the kids disobey him, or at least show him as unconcerned with stopping or rescuing them. But I don't think either of those things are true to his portrayal in the book, per se.

Song I associate with them:

"Pure Imagination."

Favorite picture of them:

This classic illustration of him by Joseph Schindelman:

This illustration by Quentin Blake:

This book cover illustration, from the edition I grew up with:

This much-memed image of Gene Wilder in the 1971 film:

Johnny Depp in the 2005 film:

Douglas Hodge in the 2013 stage musical (the only Wonka I know of in an adaptation to have his signature black goatee from the book):

Timothée Chalamet in Wonka, 2023:

[twistpixel]

Where’s that post about “yeah I like Jason source my rich inner world” because that’s literally what you have to do for jaybin. Thinking about his timeline and it’s officially start with second chances and then double back and dip into pre-crisis but put your imagination into it. Yeah this is true with everyone (when something from a different era gets mentioned and recanonized but must have happened differently to mesh with current canon) but your honor in my defense he’s a whole separate person and his dead parents have different names. Can you tell which one of us is Hikaru but it’s pre and post crisis jaybin. Jason’s dead parents meet up and Trina and Joe are like you are horrible parents you weren’t there for our boy and willis is like yeahwell at least I never threw him out a window unlike you skylarks

[therecordchanger62279]

THE BEST WRITTEN SONGS OF ALL-TIME

     Because I have zero innate musical ability, the idea that someone can sit down with a musical instrument, and create an original song out of thin air is magic to me. Songwriting is a craft, but it’s inspiration that makes a good song into a great one. There are songwriters who seem able to turn out high quality songs in perpetuity. There are others who write maybe one or two great songs, and are never heard from again. So, I made a list of what I think are the 50 best written songs I’ve ever heard. These are in no particular order. I’ve listed the title followed by the songwriter or songwriters, and in parentheses is the performer I most enjoy hearing do the song – although most of these songs have been recorded countless times by a variety of artists. You can probably find all of these on YouTube or any of the streaming services. Most have lyrics, but some do not. But, it’s hard for me to imagine any of these songs being recorded by anyone with talent, and not retaining the brilliance with which the song was written.

Claire de Lune by Claude Debussy (Eugene Ormandy & The Philadelphia Orchestra)

Rhapsody in Blue by George Gershwin (Zubin Mehta & The New York Philharmonic, Gary Graffman, piano)

A Change Is Gonna Come by Sam Cooke (Sam Cooke)

Coal Miner’s Daughter by Loretta Lynn (Loretta Lynn)

Hello Walls by Willie Nelson (Faron Young)

I Left My Heart In San Francisco by George Cory and Douglass Cross (Tony Bennett)

God Bless The Child by Arthur Herzog, Jr. and Billie Holiday (Billie Holiday)

Eleanor Rigby by Paul McCartney and John Lennon (The Beatles)

Blind Willie McTell by Bob Dylan (Bob Dylan)

A Remark You Made by Wayne Shorter (Weather Report)

She’s Always a Woman by Billy Joel (Billy Joel)

Roll Me Away by Bob Seger (Bob Seger)

Margie’s At the Lincoln Park Inn by Tom T. Hall (Bobby Bare)

Angel From Montgomery by John Prine (Bonnie Raitt and John Prine)

Rainy Night in Georgia by Tony Joe White (Brook Benton)

You Never Can Tell by Chuck Berry (Chuck Berry)

Where or When by Richard Rodgers and Lorenz Hart (Dion and The Belmonts)

American Pie by Don McLean (Don McLean)

It Was a Very Good Year by Ervin Drake (Frank Sinatra)

Gentle On My Mind by John Hartford (Glen Campbell)

Early Morning Rain by Gordon Lightfoot (Gordon Lightfoot)

Book of Rules by Harry Johnson and Barry Llewellyn (The Heptones)

Highwayman by Jimmy Webb (The Highwaymen)

American Music by Ian Hunter (Ian Hunter & Mick Ronson)

That’s Entertainment by Paul Weller (The Jam)

Song of Bernadette by Leonard Cohen (Jennifer Warnes)

Jazzman by Carole King and David Palmer (Carole King)

Talking Back to The Night by Steve Winwood and Will Jennings (Steve Winwood)

My Favorite Things by Richard Rodgers and Oscar Hammerstein II (John Coltrane)

Don’t It Make You Want to Go Home by Joe South (Joe South)

Sunday Mornin’ Comin’ Down by Kris Kristofferson (Kris Kristofferson)

Heart Like a Wheel by Anna McGarrigle (Linda Ronstadt)

I Am a Town by Mary-Chapin Carpenter (Mary-Chapin Carpenter)

Footprints by Wayne Shorter (Miles Davis Quintet)

Pleasant Valley Sunday by Gerry Goffin and Carole King (The Monkees)

This Old Town by Jon Vezner and Janis Ian (Nanci Griffith)

Brooklyn Roads by Neil Diamond (Neil Diamond)

Thrasher by Neil Young (Neil Young & Crazy Horse)

Box of Rain by Robert Hunter and Phil Lesh (Grateful Dead)

Is That All There Is? By Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller (Peggy Lee)

Louisiana 1927 by Randy Newman (Randy Newman)

King of the Road by Roger Miller (Roger Miller)

America by Paul Simon (Simon & Garfunkel)

The Sound of Silence by Paul Simon (Simon & Garfunkel)

Children’s Crusade by Sting (Sting)

My Girl by Smokey Robinson and Ronald White (The Temptations)

Green, Green Grass of Home by Claude “Curly” Putnam, Jr. (Tom Jones)

Downtown Train by Tom Waits (Tom Waits)

The Whole of The Moon by Mike Scott (The Waterboys)

My Heroes Have Always Been Cowboys by Sharon Vaughn (Willie Nelson)

[rosesloveletters]

I understand that the entire character arc for Mr. Wilkinson is to fool the viewer with his false narrative and the guise of being Arthur Slugworth, Willy Wonka’s main competitor and business rival, thus furthering the plot and setting up Wonka’s final test of all the children to see if any of them will hand off one of the everlasting gobstoppers for riches beyond their wildest imaginings, but let’s think in terms of the story and universe of willy wonka and the chocolate factory as a whole, rather than as a work of fiction written with premise, each character crafted to move the plot along and nothing more.

I’m obsessed with this because:

How and why are Willy Wonka and Mr. Wilkinson so close? In the film, Mr. Wilkinson is the only human we see that spends any time around Wonka, getting close enough to the elusive chocolatier to help him with the golden ticket factory tour plans and the ultimate test to see which of the children are honest and won’t sell out his candy secrets to Wonka’s rival.

We know that Wonka is extremely wary of people and does not trust easily, having fired all of his employees and closed the factory due to theft of his recipes. Why wasn’t Mr. Wilkinson fired? How did Wonka know Mr. Wilkinson wasn’t the one who was stealing his recipes? Did they meet after the fact? How would that have happened, considering Wonka hasn’t left his factory in years (as far as we know—this man could be disguising himself and leaving the factory all the time, which is a personal headcanon of mine.)

Point is, I am obsessed with these two and their connection because it’s so strange if you really think about it.

Wonka must trust this man immensely, but why? How did they become so close and learn to trust one another the way that they do? Mr. Wilkinson is sent to confront each of the golden ticket winners and offer them money under the false pretense that he is Slugworth, so obviously Wonka sent him to do this, so he trusts Mr. Wilkinson enough to do exactly as was dictated to him. How did they build this level of trust in one another?

And in one of the final scenes, Mr. Wilkinson effortlessly helps Wonka into his coat before Wonka, Grandpa Joe and Charlie get into the Wonka-vator and the movement is so fluid, an extension of Wonka himself, like the two have taken these steps, done these things, for years.

I am just utterly fascinated and need to know why Wonka trusts this man, but no one else.

Did he test Mr. Wilkinson in the past, to see where his loyalties lie?

Wonka felt the need to test the children. He didn’t trust Charlie until he gave back his gobstoppers, so why does he trust Mr. Wilkinson? He doesn’t have any other humans working for him.

I need answers.

[cloveroctobers]

PART iii.

Here you’ll find all fall prompts written during autumn’s 2023 season 🪱🌩️ 🏚️🧡

MAKE MY DAY — Luca x the bear

TIPTOEING — Willie Jack x Reservation Dogs

DOPAMINE — Fezco x Euphoria

TRUST — Ruby Matthews | S*x Education

CITY IS A GRAVEYARD — Rio x Good Girls

PEARLS — Joe x Ginny & Georgia

METAMORPHOSIS — Carmen Berzatto x The Bear

TERRIFIED — Hector x Black Mirror

WE GET BY — Guero x Mayans MC

MUST BE THE PLACE — Leo Usher x TFOTHOU

IMAGINING — Evan Buckley x 911

LOOPING — Richie Jerimovich x the bear

TRUE ROMANCE — Tara Carpenter x Scream

PART IV.

[chocolatedreamer22]

I've read many fanfics that go like "Charlie goes to the chocolate factory but brings his older (usually female) relative with him instead of Grandpa Joe. After the factory, she and Willy Wonka fall in love and they (live happily ever after.)"

That got me thinking "Why hasn't anyone written that story but with a different family?" I did see someone start to do just that, but Charlie and Joe were still heavily involved in the story. What's the point of using a different family if you're still gonna have the Buckets be a main part of the story? Just imagine the difference. Wonka is in love with this person, but he can't stand the child in the family. And the child's parents don't like or trust him and disapprove if his relationship with the other relative. It could be really good for conflict and character development. It'd be way more interesting than how the Buckets always like him right away.

So that's what I'm gonna attempt to do. A cheesy (or should I say chocolatey) Wonka love story but without the Buckets. Honestly, I'm just tired of reading about Charlie all the time. Let's give one of the other kids a chance.

So I'm currently working on two OCs, and I've got some ideas for what kinds of stories I might want to use them in. I even plan on writing a couple stories with BOTH of them in it. I wrote some notes for their characters. I'm still working on them, so I might add/change/remove some things. Here are some of the notes:

----------

Julia Crystal Sugar (Veruca's Cousin):

23 years old, Tried to go vegan/vegetarian once but got sick, Curious, Observant, Dislikes total silence, Good at baking, Suggests the impossible as a joke, Secretly has a crush on Wonka, Quick learner, Is/Wants to be a veterinarian, Speaks 3 languages, Protective of Veruca, Likes writing, Likes scented candles, Plays piano, Friendly but vengeful, Mom died of cancer, Afraid of heights, Likes cherry flavor, Dislikes mint flavor,

----------

??? Grace Teavee (Mike's Cousin):

(I haven't picked out a name for her yet, but I know I want it to be gender-neutral.)

25 years old, Wears dark colors, Tomboy, Likes skateboarding, Likes loud music, Likes flame design, Gets nervous if people stare at her, Kinda emo-ish, Likes graffiti, Hates eggs, Likes spicy food, Swears/Curses a lot, Works at GameStop, Good at drawing, Has a bad temper/attitude, Dislikes girly things, Her dad's a jerk but not a bad person, Thinks tattoos are sexy, Might be named Alex,

Let me know if you have any thoughts or suggestions. :)