#Jisung scenario

[ch4nb4ng]

Expect the Unexpected

Pairing: Han Jisung X afab!reader

Word count: 9.7k

Genre: Childhood friends to lovers (stoned college edition

Warnings: 18+ explicit minors do not interact. Substance use, sexual acts under the influence of substance use, Kissing, naked bodies, mentions of genitals, fingering, handjob, orgasm, mentions of semen

Tag list: @seo--changbin @j-0ne25 @cb97whoree

@kpopsstuffs

Note: HEY guys, its been a while, and like actually a while this time.... Had this sitting in the draft for almost a year. Life has very much gotten in the way but i am back hopefully, with the aim of engaging in writing when I feel like and no pressuring myself. Anyways, it's nice to be back and I hope you enjoy.

Summary: There was a blizzard, resulting in your college dorm being blocked from all human interaction. Things are about to, however change when your childhood best friend, and wall neighbour comes over and has other things in mind to pass the time with weed included as one of them.

The first time living away from your family and by yourself was an experience that you very much valued. No curfews, no worrying about what your parents were going to say when you’ve had several drinks at a party, and definitely no nagging to make your bed everyday. Make no mistake, you loved your parents and siblings a lot, it was just nice sometimes to have the complete privacy that was your dorm room every now and then. 

There were moments that you did become homesick. On the contrary to having your own private, personal space, especially during the trying moments of completing long winded assignments, studying for exams, or even just having the feeling of familiarity when you hugged somebody that was your blood. There were always pros and cons to living an independent college life. At this current moment in time, you were experiencing one of the more annoying parts of living in a college building. 

Deep into the winter seasons of the year, while also living in a state that was known for having extreme weather patterns during this time of the year was your least favorite part. Once the news alerted ‘warning, blizzard storm approaching in the next 48 hours,’ you knew that the college would be sending an official email, urging students to stay in the dorms, and barricade all exits.

This was where you were currently at.

Lying in your bed, phone up to your face as you reassured your family through facetime that you were fine and had no plans of leaving anytime soon.

“You guys know the drill,” you smiled, “I’m fine, two days in and I am alive and well, just a little bored.”

“Okay well don’t forget that Jisung’s mother and I got those rooms next to each other so you guys always have a little bit of company.”

“Yes mom I know,” you laughed, “I might text him later. He had an assignment due this afternoon and I don’t want to bother him.”

“Okay love, we will talk to you later.”

“Love you too, bye.”

The sound representing the end of the call rang through the speaker of your phone. The object fell on your chest as you let out a loud sigh, your boredom growing with each second. 

Jisung. Han Jisung was someone that could be labeled as many different things to you. Friend, confidant, best friend, study buddy; home. Jisung was the jack of all trades in your book. 

Knowing each other since the two of you were 10, meeting at a weekend competition of playing mixed teams basketball bloomed into a relationship you didn't know was even possible to have with a man. Jisung was the friend that kind of just stuck, even planning to go to the same college as you. It was a packaged deal, you and him, but it made you laugh, because the two of you could not be more of the opposite. Jisung was the shyer type. Although you met through sporting engagements, that was more something that his parents put him into to see what he liked. He was very intelligent, a strong preference to have his head in the books rather than going out to a new party every weekend. Make no mistake, Jisung was a very polite individual, always talking to those that gave the time. However, he was much more comfortable with people that he knew. In contrast, you were a social butterfly, able to make friends every corner you turned. Parties and drinking every weekend; anywhere but the was where the majority of your time was spent. 

Therefore, when all the buildings on campus were closed, it drove you crazy. There was nothing that could be hated more than being forced to stay inside in your eyes. The confinement always made you reconsider why it was here, in this state, that you chose to attend college. But it was when you heard a knock on the door that you were reminded why. Leg flopping out of your bed sheets, they dragged you to the door, your body sprinkled in warmth when you opened it to your kind looking friend who happened to be smiling back. Your body turned to the side, hand out as he strolled into your apartment, plopping down on the couch like it was his own. You quickly followed, taking the spot next to him as you turned to face him.

“Are you bored yet?”

“Of course I am,” you sigh, walking in front of Jisung as you walk into the living room of your apartment and sitting on the couch, head in your hands, leaning forward so much that you could almost fall off the couch “as if it took you this long to realise.”

“Y/n, the email was only sent out 4 hours ago.”

“Yeah but there was supposed to be a party tonight at Changbin’s frat,” you whined, lips fully pouted, “I really wanted to go.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, placing his hands behind his head, legs kicked out on the small table in front of him, “it’s a real shame that the party is canceled.”

Your best friend managed to avoid eye contact, voice dripping with sarcasm. To be truthful, you knew that even though he would go with you, to make sure you're safe of course, and DEFINITELY for that reason only, Jisung would never choose to willingly go to such a party. It wasn’t that he was a complete prude little innocent boy, no. There had been a multitude of times where you could hear him, or the other girls that failed to stay quiet and not echo through the paper thin dorm walls. Jisung just simply wasn’t the type to go out to parties, especially when everyone there was a slobbering mess on one substance or another, especially you. There was a feeling that if you were merely a stranger to him, Jisung would most likely, outside of classes, be a ghost. A myth that supposedly walks down the hallways of your college. Seeing as the two of you were opposite in that regard, you tried to respect Jisung as much as possible. Not bringing your bong, joints, or excessive amounts of alcohol whenever he came over, because you knew if the shoe was on the other foot, he would also do the same. Jisung only had the occasional puff anyway, much less than you, so the need to have it around constantly felt unnecessary.

“Try not to ooze with excitement,” you raised your eyebrows, a fake smile plastering across your lips as you failed to see his attitude change. Good old Jisung for you.

“I’ll try my best.”

“Anyway,” you replied, leaning forward and grabbing the TV remote, pressing the small red power button in the top right corner, watching the plasma screen light up with the logo belonging to Netflix. You turn again to the man beside you, a warmth feeling in your chest at how placid he looked, patiently waiting for you to put something on.

“Is there anything you would like to watch for the next 12 hours?”

Yes, 12 hours. That was you being optimistic that this storm would be quick.

“Hmm,” Jisung hummed, bringing his index finger and thumb to his chin, thinking about what to watch, “there isn’t anything I’ve been keeping up with.”

“Ah I see. Shall we just scroll until we find something we like?”

“Sounds like a great idea.”

Clicking on your profile, the first row of TV shows were ‘Watch it again,’ followed by ‘Top hits for Y/n.’ Nothing really caught your eye, or his seeing as he would say something if he did. It wasn’t until your ‘continue watching for y/n’ that you gasped, loud. The word ‘Bridgerton’ has popped up in continuing. At first you were confused. Although you were an avid lover of that show, you had not watched it recently. It wasn’t until you selected it that you realized a new season had come out. Jisung remained puzzled, seeing as this was not something he had a remote interest in watching. 

“Oh my god Jisung can we-”

“No man,” he complained, “you know this is the last thing I would want to watch.”

“Please,” you begged, placing your hands in the form of a prayer, remote still in hand, “it’s so good I beg of you please to just consider. I’ll do anything.”

“Ugh fine,” he hissed, “but I cannot be 100% sober for this shit.”

Your eyebrow furrowed, displaying a look of confusion. This was the thing you would expect someone like Jisung to say.

“Hmm ok,” you hummed, still slightly confused, “I’ll get my stash of vodka.”

“Hmmm no,” he shrugged, a slightly suggestive glimmer on his face, “something that will be long-lasting, if you’re catching my drift.” 

Jisung raised his eyebrows repeatedly, leaving your mind to imply one substance only. Weed.

“You want to smoke, really?”

“Yes y/n, I want to smoke weed, is that ok with you?”

“Of course it is,” you reassured, “you know that if you were here or not I would probably do it anyway.”

“Okay.”

“Done.”

“Okay, and we have to watch from the beginning or I will go back to my room.”

“Yes yes okay fine,” you leaned over, pressing a grateful kiss on his cheek, “you’re the best. I’ll get my stash now.”

You scurried off to your room, quickly, opening the small draw on your side table next to your bed. Your stash, the prized possession that was the calm before the storm. Smoking in your downtime was something that you very much looked forward to, especially if you were unnecessarily stressed out. Your face lit up and the clouds of dark green hue clouded the plastic bag that was in your sight, fingers grasping the edge as you wiggled back to your original spot. Although you agreed, it was strange of your friend to want to just smoke out of boredom. The only time you had seen him do it was at small gatherings, and even then, it was one puff and done, usually followed by heavy chest hitting coughs. It always made you laugh. It also made you feel bad, knowing that if he didn’t hang around with you, he probably wouldn’t do these kinds of things. Jisung was an adult who could make his own decisions, but there was always part of you that thought about him, his family; would they approve of him doing this? It was a lot to think about sometimes. 

It was Jisung’s turn to hold the remote, flicking back to season 1 episode 1, before scooching closer to you. Jisung was keen to get in on the action, something you were definitely not used to. He went to reach for the paper, but you grabbed him by the wrist, making him pause for a moment.

“Jisung, are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes,” he smiled, unsure why you were asking such a question, “it’s not the first time I’ve done it y/n, relax.”

“Yeah I know,” you shrugged, “it’s just, I’ve only seen you smoke once, and you looked like you were about to cough up your lungs.”

“Oh,” he sighed, looking away in embarrassment, “you saw that?”

“Unfortunately, I did.”

“Yeah well I can do it,” he barked, somewhat getting defensive, pointing at the TV to deflect from his deficits “you’re making me watch this shit.”

“Okay okay,” you whined, letting go of his wrist, “but please let me show you how to roll and smoke a joint properly so you don’t actually hurt yourself.”

The two of you giggled simultaneously, resulting in Jisung reluctantly nodding in agreement. He watched closely as he watched you open both bags, paper on the right, weed on the left.

“Okay so,” you began to speak, “firstly,” you paused again, using your index and middle finger on your right hand to slide into the plastic, “I like to slide my fingers in like this, touching the least amount of paper possible.” 

Jisung pushed his lenses right up to his face, making sure his concentration was avid; missing a step was not an option for him. Once the sheet was out of paper, you placed it on top of the plastic. You like to take pride in your work, especially being a part time stoner, of your supplies. Seeing as it cost you a significant amount, it felt wrong to not get the best out of your product. 

“Then,” you continued, “you get the bag with the goods, and I like to,” pausing again, opening the bag and grabbing one cluster, “just crush it in my fingers as small as I can, and sprinkle it in a line across the center.”

He nodded again, observing how smooth your fingers were, fingertips sprinkling green across the white square placed in the table.

“Are you following?”

“Of course,” he nodded, furrowing his eyebrows to show his concentration. Jisung swallowed a nervous gulp, remembering that he really had no idea what he was going to do when he coughed his lungs up one more time. Yes, he was concentrating on how you did it, but he couldn’t help it. His cognitions were descending into the gutter, especially watching the two fingers he tended to use when he was in lewd acts himself. It made him nervous. 

Sure, there were intrusive thoughts about you being a part of his fantasies and desires, but Jisung knew better than to act on something that came from pure lust. Instead, pressing his lips together, attempting to stifle the giggle that threatened to erupt from his lips. You, however, were too smart to not notice him suppressing his laughter. Your elbow nudged his side, a sheepish gaze as you began to question him.

“What’s so funny?”

“What,” he questioned, puffing his cheeks and shaking his head, patting your arm, “keep going.”

You decided to shrug it off, not letting his immaturity obstruct you from your prized possession. Next was the rolling. Lifting the paper with the utmost precaution, the material was brought to your lips, tongue sticking out as your lips lay a thin layer of saliva to coat the edge of the paper.

“See what I did with my tongue?”

‘Oh god,’ was all Jisung could think, mind once again heading straight to the gutter. All he could think about was what your tongue, if it was positioned under a different appendage, how different it could be. His testosterone was raging, but once again, he knew better. To Jisung, nothing could be worse than putting his own selfish wants ahead of your friendship. However, the longer he stared at you practically making out with the joint, licking it up and down, side to side, making sure the two ends stuck together, the harder it became to push his thoughts away from such dirty crevices of his mind. The torture was over for him once you withdrew the now complete joint from your lips. You were satisfied with how it turned out, a smile of approval, and a hint of arrogance plastered on your face.

“And that’s how you do it. Now your turn.”

“Ok,” he sighed, “swap spots with me so I can do it.”

“Yes sir,” you mumbled, playfully rolling your eyes you obeyed, allowing your best friend to now sit in front of the two bags. He followed your steps with ease, using great precision with his fingers to eject the weed and paper from each plastic container. He was natural. Only the two fingers, being the same ones you, strategically rolling the two digits back and forth. He was swift, nimble, adjectives you normally liked to use when you felt the touch of a man. It was your turn to swallow nervously, a small pit of arousal brewing in your lower abdomen as the small pelts of green substance dissipated across the center of the paper, just like you did. Holy shit, how could something as simple as rolling a joint be so attractive? Jisung brought a hand to his hair, running it quickly through the brown mop to get it out of his face, aiming to let no obstacles get in his way. He gave you one look, a gaze of concern when he noticed your eyes glued to his hands. 

“You okay?”

Your eyes shot straight to his, attempting to not be mesmerized by the joyful expression covering his features. Fuck, why was his smile having such an impact on you right now? He chuckled, assuming that you were just playing around, but in reality, you were definitely distracted by the attractiveness of your friend with a sudden fresh washed mop of brown hair, glasses, and shining complexion of the side of his face as the light from the window cascaded across the high points of his cheeks. You faked a smile, nodding as you egged him on to continue. Panic began to settle in however when you saw the bare tip of his tongue coating the corner of the white material. Holy shit, he really was a natural. Licking the edge right across in one swift motion, not using too much saliva, yet still using enough. It was almost offensive how much better his joint looked compared to yours. But that was just what Jisung was: a perfectionist with little effort in trying to attain said perfection. He didn’t stray too much out of the norm, yet when he did try something, he was always good at it from the first try. Sometimes it made you wonder what other things he would be good at. But that was for another time, with a similar mindset in the fact that a brief thought of sexual fantasy was not worth more than your friendship. Especially if he didn't reciprocate, the awkwardness after would be something you most definitely could not handle.

“Woah,” you gasped, grasping the joint out of his hand, intensely observing it from each angle, “I knew you would be good at this.”

Your best friend beamed at your approval, eagerly waiting for the next step. 

“Oh my lighter, I’ll go grab it now.”

You forgot before, but this gave you time to completely subtract those devil filled thoughts of Jisung by not looking at him for a brief moment. It worked, because as soon as you opened the drawer and saw your lighter, all you could focus on was lighting that shit up. 

Coming back to the living room once more, you placed the fire breathing object on the table, offering Jisung to go first. He looked hesitant, unsure how or where he should start. It was adorable when Jisung was like this, because he was clueless not very often. You decided to pick it back up, pressing the flicker down once to ignite the flame.

“Do you want to go first, or would you like me to go first?”

“Uhm,” he hummed, “I think you should go first, you know, show me how to do this shit properly.”

“Okay,” you chuckled, letting go of the flicker on the lighter, handing it over to him, “well I usually don’t light my own joints so would you do me the honors?”

“Of course,” he purred, the smoothness of his tone delivering a sudden pulse to your core. You leant forward, completely forgetting that your clothing was completely revealing by all means. The looseness of your long sleeve white shirt was telling, the action of leaning forward exposing the subtlety of your cleavage. You could see Jisung’s eyes travel straight to them, but only for a brief moment. He was trying to be as respectful as he could, but it was impossible when your chest was right there. His thumb dragged with ease, flame luminous as he brought the orange tipped flame to the edge of your joint. The tip turned dark immediately, and the taste of the herb came with that. The sensation was immediate, as you grabbed the joint with two fingers, pulling the object away from your lips and letting the warmth of the smoke spilling, down your chest,  and back up again, eyes fluttering shut as you puffed the smoke from your lips, the feeling of nostalgia hitting you.

Jisung watched you in awe, amazed at how easily smoking came to you. He wanted to try so bad. He wanted to prove to you that he could do something that you did not expect of him. But he was patient, waiting for you to open your eyes before he started. 

“Mmmm,” you hummed in pure bliss, lifting your eyelids slightly, “that is some good shit.”

“Yeah?”

“Yessss,” you hissed, grabbing onto his hands holding the lighter, sliding it out of his hand “your turn. Place the joint between your lips and lean forward.”

Jisung did as he was told, adjusting his positioning to being abnormally close to you. You didn’t pay much mind, the small flame igniting once again, but you paused, almost forgetting that he in fact did now know what he was doing.

“Ok so once I light this,” you paused, using your free hand to squeeze his jaw, “are you listening?”

His eyes widened at your sudden touch, a small nod which was obstructed by your somewhat firm grasp.

“Ok so once I light this, take a small breath in, hold for a second, and blow it out.”

“Yes maam,” he smiled, looking deep into your eyes before you passed him the bud, waiting for him to grasp it between his two fingers. When he does, still keeping his eyes on you, simultaneously feeling your brain drop slightly at how intense his gaze was in this very moment, lips forming into the shape of an o as the paper came to his lips, taking the smallest puff, and blowing it out. You were impressed, seeing this was the first time he smoked anything without coughing his lungs out. A smile came to your lips, proud of your best friend in the moment.

“Woah,” he sighed, finally breaking his stare, eyes changing towards the blunt. His chest descended as he took another puff, turning back to face the tv as his back gently slid into the couch. 

“How was that?”

“Is it crazy that I already feel more relaxed than before?”

His response made you giggle, glad he was enjoying himself. 

“I told you,” sighing as you snatched the blunt from his grip, taking a long drag, “I only smoke the high quality stuff.”

“Sure do,” he growled, sinking deeper and deeper into the couch. Jisung grabbed the remote, pressing play on the TV, greeted by a girl in a royal style gown. He forgot that it was Bridgerton that got him here in this predicament. 

***

It did not take much for the two of you to feel the consequences of smoking. One thing you hated to admit was that you craved the presence of someone next to you when under the influence. But not just like in your orbit no. Like needing a lack of personal space. To be suffocated. Which is why the two of you were sitting the way you were now. Your legs atop of his own, head buried into his chest, with your arms wrapped around his torso. 

The intrusive thoughts always won when you were high, which is how your fingertips came to be not just on your best friend, but under his shirt, skin to skin contact. You couldn’t deny that the texture of his defined build, muscles budding at each ridge was hard to miss. 

Bridgerton had been playing, but if anything, at this point, it had become background noise, the main noise becoming the tension that thickened between the two of you with each passing minute. Although the relationship was close,the idea of  intimacy was never something that had come up as a thought. Sober you, and sober him, would never do such a thing. Feeling that maybe it would cross a boundary. 

But the usual thought did not cross your mind. Or his for that matter, Jisung’s digits generously spread across the outside of your thigh, dangerously close to your behind. It felt nice, honestly. Yes, you had your fair share of one night stands. Male attention followed you, easily, whether you were looking for it or not. With that being said, however, it had been a while since you remembered what a real man's touch felt like. Especially your best friend. Being a biology major, Jisung was consistently practical in the lab, using his hands in the most intricate ways. Whether looking at a small piece of bacteria in a microscope, or dissecting an organ of some sort, he was always using his hands, and boy, was that evident when you felt the texture of his callous palms spreading across the back of your leg. 

The puffing came to a halt, joint burning down halfway to its bud, but it was enough to heighten your senses. The two of you looked at each other, eyelids a little more droopy than usual as the both of you giggled, looking back at the TV. By the time the two of you were actually paying attention to the storyline, Daphne and Simon were getting married.

“So what’s the premises?”

“Premises?” You giggled, finding humor in your best friend’s speaking mishap.

“Yeah like,” he paused, maneuvering your body to be closer to his, leaving now no room on the couch between the two of you, “like what’s the show about.”

“It’s a period romance show based on a series of books.”

“Ohh, I thought you didn't like to read, you fucking nerd.”

“Oi,” you nudged him, completely missing the side of his arm and falling onto his chest, “I don't, that’s why I'm watching the show instead.”

“Right, anyway, go on.”

“Right, so Daphne and Simon basically pretended to be together so this other guy, creepy as fuck, wouldn’t have to marry her. But then they realized they developed feelings for each other but are both inendial about it so they're discussing the topic on their wedding day and just going through with it because it was too late for them to change their mind.” If either of you did not see the irony in this situation.

“That literally made no fucking sense,” Jisung sighed, using his free hand to scratch the back of his head, “but to be honest, I really can’t concentrate on anything you’re saying.”

“Damnnn,” you gasped, leaning up to look at him, “you’re high.”

“Yeah pfft,” Jisung hummed, keeping his glazed eyes focused on you, “I feel like I can just say or do anything right now.”

“That’s the beauty of smoking Ji,” you smiled, turning away and facing the screen. It was at this point that married TV couples were in their honeymoon suite. If you were being honest, it was hard to keep up with the dialogue due to the speed and the actual content being in old english. It was much less difficult to follow the visuals, their facial expressions, how they spoke. It was still captivating, watching the two actors get close and closer, right until their lips met. As they continued, the room felt silent yet tense. The two of you watched adamantly as things began to heat up, Simon assisting Daphne in undressing herself. It was then that you felt Jisung adjust himself under your legs, brushing him off of you as he sunk back into the couch. You thought it was strange, but you decided it was better to ignore it, remembering how mesmerizing the scene of Daphne and Simon making love for the first time really was. As they moved to their new bed, Simon hovering over Daphne’s innocent body, a new sensation was forming in your lower abdomen, but it didn't stop there, unmistakably flying right to your core, again. While recalling how mesmerizing this particular scene was, you also forgot how much it aroused you simultaneously. This was a mistake. Being high and horny was not a good combination, especially when Jisung, your best friend, was sitting next to you, previously with his hands on you. It was probably better to disregard these lustful feelings, they surely would pass.

“Oh shit,” Jisung mumbled, grasping for the small decorative pillow next to him, placing it over his crotch area, “this is um, wow, it’s uh-”

“Yeah I kinda forgot,” you replied before facing him, noticing the now pillow covering the beginning of his lower limbs. At first you were confused, eyebrows furrowed at why he would do such a thing. Instead of minding your business, and beating the paranoia of not knowing what he was doing that was amplified after smoking, you were now  holding the pillow, the sounds of Daphne’s moans and groans the only noise that could be heard. As soon as Jisung noticed your grip on the pillow, he resisted you, not wanting you to see what was happening underneath the soft object.

“Jisung,” you laughed nervously, genuinely confused at his behavior, “what are you doing with my pillow.”

“Nothing,” he hushed, attempting to dismiss your question with the tone of his voice floating thin into the air, “keep watching.”

He pointed at the screen, head nodding in the same direction as you let go of the pillow and focused on the TV. But that was the worst mistake you could have made, because it was Simon’s turn to undress, and once he did, it really was game over. The two of them there, completely naked as he began to thrust into his new wife. Simon’s grunts were short, staccato like, while Daphne was more graceful, each moan spilling into her husband's ear as the two of them went at it.

“Fuck this is making me really horny.”

As soon as your best friend said that, he brought his fingers to his lips, leaving your jaw dropped. Did he really just say that, or were you hallucinating?

“Woops,” Jisung mumbled, “the weed is really making me lose my filter. Sorry.”

You should have hated that he blurted that out. Letting the intrusive thoughts win, especially when high, was not a good sign. But it brought the ache that momentarily dulled right back. Looking back at the screen, Jisung now removed the pillow and revealed his full hard on through his thin fabric sweatpants: it was becoming too much. Now suddenly, the only thought that stayed consistent was wanting the same thing on the TV. Right here. Right now. With Jisung. Your best friend.

“Don’t be sorry,” you cooed, moving closer to him, “I would be lying if I said I wasn’t either.”

He said nothing, only gasping in a subtle manner as Jisung looked at you, all of a sudden your features projecting to him as illustrious, appetizing. Jisung wanted nothing more than to devour you in the current moment.

“Is this normal?” 

Jisung’s voice was so nonchalant, tone lacking concern or hesitation at your lack of proximity. It was kind of adorable, really. The normal friend you knew was one to freak out if he ever did something like this. Usually so prim and proper in every setting. In contrast, there was something sexy about the way he was acting. Sure, actions had consequences, but thinking with clarity was not a priority.

“I would say so,” you purred, voice soothing as your fingers crept onto the front of his knee closest to you, “weed makes me horny too.”

“O-oh,” his voice shook, suddenly a little nervous by the prospect of you touching him in a possibly arousing way, “Y/n.”

Jisung’s voice was breathy, chest heaving very slowly as his eyes shot down to your body. Suddenly, your best friend was amazed by every single curve and creativity of your figure. As he brought his hands to your behind, it suddenly felt so soft, hands unforgivingly slipping past the waistband of your shorts, making direct contact with your skin. The contact made you hot, using your free hand to fan yourself. Jisung took the hand of yours that was moving deathly slowly along his inner thigh off of him, body now on his side facing you as he withdrew his hand groping your ass. Instead, he moved it around to the front, but rather than dipping straight into your folds, he slipped in the layer under your outer layer, opting for the space inbetween, digits spreading across your core covered by the miniscule fabric.. It was better this way, he thought. The sensation of touch was much more sensitive under the influence as he wanted to feel every texture of your body that was possible. You giggled at the brush of his gentle touch, a small gasp quickly following up once you realized that his fingers, although not making direct contact, were feeding that arousal felt between your legs. Like scratching an impossible itch. His eyes were already on you when your neck turned, facing him. 

“Shit,” you breathed, “you’re really good at that.”

“I’m barely touching you,” he hissed, lips getting closer to your own. What is happening right now? You should be saying no; rejected his advances. Your best friend. Jisung. The shy, little boy you had known him to be all of his life. But the longer his fingers pushed around that sensitive button of yours, the more your legs spread open for him, hips gently bucking to reach for more surface area of his fingers. His confidence was charming, almost too much so. It made you want more and more, so much so that your internal conflict of stopping and telling him to keep going was disappearing with each lingering moment. Rationality, once a perplexity in your mind disappeared the moment his lips landed on yours. God they were sweet, soft; every texture that you know felt pleasant was coming to your mind the moment they moved against your own. His free hand came to the side of your face that was farthest away, index finger spread across your jaw as he moved his tongue, deeper and deeper, maintaining his dominance over you. Fuck he was a good kisser, a whine erupting from your throat at how flexible his mouth was, bending over backwards to make sure that you were happy with the pace.

“Mhm,” you hummed, pulling away from a brief moment to remove all bottoms, panties included. All your best friend could do was chuckle, deeply, the shade of his eyes turning as dark as you had ever seen when he saw your bare pussy out, for him. His fingers latched on immediately, using the index and middle finger on one hand to spread your lips, the other fingers on the opposite hand barely scratching your clit. The feeling almost made you wriggle out of your seat, mouth agape across Jisung’s cheeks in a sloppy effort to maintain composure of any sort.. Everything was happening so fast. All it took was barely one scene for the two of you to let down your guards. Pretending that your friendship meant nothing. It was never friendship. Jisung would be a ghost to you if the two of you had not been friends since childhood. Maybe there were in fact other reasons that the two of you stayed this way. The moans and groans of the girls he would have over, filling up the bare distance between your room and his, always had an effect on you. It was then when you started to question what he did to those girls to make them feel so good that you were doomed. It was easy to act like a crazy party girl in front of him, knowing that he would never want to be with someone like that, and by doing that, it would push those little feelings right down to where you had the ability to forget them. Avoidance was always key.

But then Jisung would bring you food while you were up doing an assignment, buy you a bouquet of flowers when it was your birthday. Even the way he would talk to your siblings back at home was enough. Jisung was enough and maybe now, by getting these hormonal feelings out, which felt like heaven, was enough to admit that this would not be just a high rendezvous for you, but something real. 

“You’re like really wet,” Jisung hummed, sliding his fingers closer and closer to your whining entrance, “always wondering how you would’ve felt like this.”

“You have?”

“Oh yeahhhh,” Jisung replied, sarcastic, as if it was super obvious, “all the time.”

“Fuck that’s so hot,” you moaned, gripping his wrist, bringing the digits specifically up to your lips for a moment,  taking his DNA into a deep thorating motion The two fingers he was about to use now utterly drenched in your slick before navigating them down your body, circling your entrance before effortlessly plunging them straight into your hole. Jisung could have creamed himself then and there. Due to the sensitivity of his first time being high, he knew that if he was going to fuck you today, he truly would not last long, at all. But instead of ruining the moment that way, he decided to make it all about you. Wanting to view you squirm under him, make his best friend: you feel good. It is something he has been patiently waiting for. Jisung was a giver, and if he wanted to give you a toe curling orgasm on your couch to make you happy, he was going to do so, whatever it took.

As soon as he fingers reached the end of your whole, the two of you moaned in unison, the sound of squelch that was your arousal already an intense volume.

“D-don’t think I’ve been this wet before,” you whined, waiting for Jisung to gently pull them out.

“Really,” he questioned, genuinely baffled, “no one ever made you this wet before? Find that hard to believe.”

Your hips wriggled, desperate to feel the friction of him moving back and forth. However he was so mesmerized by the texture of your velvety walls against his digits, that he used his other hand, coated in your slick, to relieve himself, the encounter resulting in Jisung becoming much too impatient to bother taking his pants off. Your eyes shot straight to the small motion you were witnessing of him moving his hand against his cock. Oh, his length must feel so good like this. Once Jisung began to move his fingers that were inside of you, a string of curse words easily fell from your lips, unable to control anything that came from them. The sensory overload was at peak, and if you were sober, feeling overwhelmed would be an understatement. 

With that being said, you were not, and neither was Jisung. The brooding tip that was his cock gently nudged your inner thigh. As he continued to grow, it had nowhere else to go. The simplest of touches felt like a million times more than when under the influence. But it had to be a culmination of things. Seeing Jisung dominate in something, take control. Fuck. Hearing those girls in his dorm had more of an impact on you than you originally thought. 

Your mind drifted to those memories for a brief moment, the faint moans of the girls, but it suddenly occurred that you never knew what he sounded like. Jisung was a silent fuck? There was no way. 

Your gaze drifted, Jisung immediately noticing and pausing his fingers with immediate concern.

“Y/n?”

Your head turned back faster than your eyes, deep in motion. It was silent, the TV pretty much non-existent as you grabbed him by the jaw, index finger and thumb strong on his mandible as your eyes fixated on his lips.

“How come you never moan when you fuck?”

Jisung panicked at first, a laugh following immediately after, the contagious sound making you laugh too. Your body was limp for a brief moment, falling off of your best friend's lap and next to him on the couch. Jisung ripped his glasses off his head, throwing them onto the table in front of him, allowing him to get a genuine look at how hot and flustered you truly were. Solely because of him.

“What are you talking about,” he giggled, fingertips immediately grabbing the flesh of your thigh, any part of you was good to him, as long as he could get his hands on it, right now.

“How would you know if I’m a silent fuck or not?”

“Because,” you smacked him lightly, letting him remove his hand from your skin “I can hear when you fuck other girls, pfft,” you huffed, lifting your legs in the air to discard your bottoms that were puddled around your ankles, “they’re always so fucking loud man.”

Jisung’s cheeks blushed in the tiniest form. It’s not that he was embarrassed. Okay, maybe part of him was a little embarrassed, completely caught off guard and forgetting that the walls in the dorm were paper thin. Part of him felt guilty that you had to hear that. He began to pout, but immediately dropped his lips when he realized that you were half naked. His fingertip immediately wrapped around each hip, forcing you to sit on his lap and face him. You lifted your hips, eyes signaling down to his pants that were overdue in needing to be removed. Jisung complied immediately, whisking his sweats and boxers off in one motion, causing his hard length to meet with your soaked core, his tip prodding gently at your folds. You bit down on your lip trying as hard as you could to focus on Jisung’s face, rather than focusing on how erect his cock was against you. Jisung tugged at your shirt, gawking when you lifted your arms to see no other material supporting your chest. Jisung was mesmerized once again. Another surface area that he wanted his hands on immediately.

“I can’t believe you heard me fuck other girls and never said anyti-”

“Shhh,” you hushed, pressing your folds firmer against Jisung’s cock. Your best friend reach for your hips immediately, in shock of your bold actions, “I don’t fucking care Jisung it’s fine just touch me, please.”

“You don’t have to ask twice,” he huffed, palms snaking past your abdomen and gripping onto your tits hard, firm, rough. Ugh. Nothing had ever felt so good in your life. All this time you thought Jisung was a stupid little pathetic boy, with the occasional fuck here and there. God, it would almost make you laugh at how incorrect your perception was of him in the bedroom. Truth was, he knew what he was doing, because your arousal was doing nothing but increasing with each longing moment that his wood was not inside of you.

“Soft fucking tits,” Jisung mumbled, almost drooling as he slapped one of your nipples, the skin imeediadtely turning hard as he brought his lips to to the bud. His teeth appeared, claws like, as he took the same one in his mouth, not returning for breath as he nippled, licked, sucked; you name it, Jisung was doing that. 

“Oh my god,” you groaned, head rolling back in pleasure, “how are you so good at everything you do?”

A chuckle escaped Jisung’s lips, the vibration felt across the entirety of your chest, “I’m not I-”

The two of you paused, freezing entirely when you heard Jisung’s phone ring. He glazed over, noticing the words “Mom” written across the top of the screen. He looked away as he turned back to you, that look of hunger dilating his pupils. The temporary freeze made Jisung long for you even more.

“Jisung,” you whispered, hands placed across his face and upper neck, “you should answer.”

“No,” he huffed, attaching his lips over your neck sporadically, “if it’s an emergency she’ll call me again. I’m busy.”

The phone was silent for maybe a few seconds, before it began to ring again. Jisung scoffed, removing his hands from you as he picked up his phone. 

Your joint and lighter were in arms reach. You ignored the conversation, bringing the material to your lips and lighting it up again, your body relaxing even more as you took a deep breath in, feeling the substance sink into your skin, blowing out the remnants after. Your eyes turned to Jisung, his already on you, eyeing the joint in your hand. He leaned forward, waiting for you to put the joining between his lips. You complied, bringing the flame in unison. Jisung mumbled his words for a brief moment before blowing out the air.

“Yes mom,” he answered, “I’m fine. Y/n is fine, I just checked in on her.”

A small giggle came to your lips, followed by Jisung covering them. Removing his appendages, you decided to stand up, letting go of Jisung on his lap as you dropped to your knees. Like a predator, you crawled over, eye level with his knees. Jisung’s brows furrowed, taking him a bit of time to realize what you were about to do. He was still on the phone, talking to his mum about god knows what. That wasn’t your focus for now. It was spreading his legs wide, Jisung’s hardness evident as it spread across his groin. Your lips curled upward as you situations yourself where you needed to be, Jisung’s eyes widening as he realized what you were about to do.

“Yes I am s-sutdying hard,” Jisung shuttered, the sudden touch being your hand wrapped around the base of him startling him, “j-just finished one a-assignment today.” 

A deep, lustrous chuckle escaped your mouth as you began to pump him, watching your best friend’s sensitivity, squirming at the touch. Jisung was doing everything in his power not to moan, prevent knowing how much effect you had on him, and form his mum knowing what he was doing.

“Mom can I c-call you back l-later, bit b-bust, busy right now.”

Jisung’s body jolts forward the moment he felt your tongue on the underside of him, making its way to his tip. He hung up the phone, tired of this torture as his hands found their way through your hands immediately. His sign of eagerness felt so good, the gentle tug from him begging you to go down on him completely driving you wild. The pain mixed in with pleasure immediately, traveling to your core and pulsating harder than it has ever felt in your life. Jisung was lengthy, but that was no problem. Beginning, slowly, you took him into your mouth, a guttural moan bleeding from his lips as his head rolled back with ease. 

“Holy fucking shit,” he gasped, almost running of out of room to breath, “you’re so fucking good at this baby”

A slight moan fell from your lips at the use of the pet name. Jisung’s head snapped back down immediately to you, catching your gaze in an instant. Your eyes looked bigger to him, doe like. It was driving Jisung wild; he could’ve finished right then and there. Being high and having the elevated physical sensation from your magical touch was something he could live with forever, maybe become addicted to. If this is what life felt like under the influence, he now wanted this all the time.

“Mmmh,” you sighed, a large pop and breath coming from your lips as you replaced your hand, “you taste so good Sungie.” 

Your free hand traveled down your body, descending to the apex between your thighs to satisfy that ache that was growing with intensity with every second passed. The attempt to hide your pleasure was amateur, biting down on your bottom lip as a stifled groan left your lips.

“Y/n, baby,” Jisung purred, leaning forward and grabbing your forearms, “come here.”

You did as you were told, helping him hoist you back onto his lap. The brush of him against you this time is 10x more powerful and intense. Nothing had ever felt like this before; you never wanted this to end. Jisung scanned you again, looking up and down one more time before seizing the hem of his shirt, ripping it over his head. You gasped, hands immediately clamping onto him as you leaned forward, reattaching your lips to his.

Above everything, Jisung’s lips felt the best. This symbolized so many times, conscious and unconscious, did you think about how they would feel. What they would taste like. How other girls thought Jisung’s lips tasted and felt like. Jisung smiled as he pulled away, the devilishly handsome smile on his face as he leaned into your ear, “sit next to me baby.” 

It seemed that the only thing you could do was be obedient to Jisung. His orders were like music to your ears. In your friendship dynamic, you tended to be the more domineering one. Making decisions for Jisung, whereas he was the more nonchalant friend. Always happy to go with the flow, as long as he was with you. This time, may things were different.

Jisung sat in the same place with his legs spread. Leaning over, he grabbed you by the thigh closest to him, fingers dancing across the skin on the inside of your thigh as his lips turned upward again. All of a sudden you felt nervous. Watching your best friend ogle you was a strange feeling. Jisung immediately noticed your energy shift.

“Y/n.”

“Yeah,” your eyes widened, looking directly at him.

“You okay baby?”

“Yeah? Yeah! Sorry, let me have another puff.”

Jisung saw you grab the joint and the lighter again, bringing to your lips before he reached for your wrist, pushing the objects away, forcing your attention to be on him only.

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to.”

“No,” you interjected, bringing the material and lighting the tip once more, “I fucking want you. I just zoned out for a second.”

You pressed a kiss to his lips, followed by his cheek, back of the ear and down to his neck, cascading hisdown to the middle of his chest. Jisung giggled at the feeling, the tickling sensation emitting fire throughout his body. He returned the favor, placing a kiss atop of your breast before he reached for his own joint, handing you the lighter, “Will you do me the honors?”

“Fuck yes I will,” you marvelled at his enthusiasm, lighting up the joint without a hesitation, watching him sit back and close his eyes, taking everything in. You did the same, wanting to embrace that feeling that resulted in you buying this in the first place. 

It was as if the last puff recharged your best friend, his eyes reopening, that dark, lustful caste creeping back into them as he reached for you, pushing your leg out of the way, hand clasping your inner thigh. There was no sign of his movement stopping, fingers already pushing your folds across, almost as if they were in the way completely. A sharp gasp fell from your lips the moment his middle finger touched your clit, the sensation overwhelming immense as he began to move in circular motions. Jisung’s touch was gentle, in reality, he was barely applying any pressure. But in this moment, the pleasure you were deriving from his fingers was tenfold. Eyelids were fluttering, it felt like you could barely keep up with him. It wasn’t until you saw Jisung’s cock twitch out of the corner of your eye that you knew what you had to do. 

It was time for your hand to snake around his body, but, in contrast to Jisung, you did not want to wait. There was no time to tease; you were simply too desperate. Fingertips found his weak spot fast, dexterity sloppy wrapped around your best friend once again as you matched the pace he found on you. It was slow, sensual, anything to build the pressure between your thighs, and between his. 

“Y/n, baby,” he whined, a deep groan following, “Your hands are my favorite part of you right now.”

A seductive chuckle escaped your lips, “Your hands are my favorite part of you right now too Sungie.”

“Fuck I love it when you call me that with your voice all fucked up and groggy.”

“Sungie baby, I always call you that,” you paused, bringing short circuiting from the finger that Jisung slipped inside of you, “what’s so d-different about it now.”

“You always turn me on Y/n,” Jisung grogged back, “always,” he smiled, pausing again, “especially right now.”

A small heat came to your cheeks, hips gently dragging across his fingers. God, was this what heaven felt like? Your hand picked up in speed, Jisung reacted immediately with a gentle whine. The noises he made to you were like an orchestra playing its grand piece. Another side of Jisung that you had not seen, but were mesmerized by. It was a whole new world. A whole new territory of risk that the two of you had decided to explore. However, all rational and logical decisions were thrown out the window a very long time ago. Jisung wrapped his free hand around your breast, clasping onto your nipple as he entered another finger into you, index and middle finger picking up their pace, adding the squelching sound of your wetness as another sound that filled your tiny dorm room. Dorm room. You forget momentarily how thin the walls were; but who gives a fuck? It’s not like Jisung was going to hear. He was the one that was making you moan over and over anyway.

“Sungie,” you whimpered, “feels so good.”

“Say my name like that again.”

“Sungie.”

“Fuck,” he growled, pushing deeper into your walls, “your pussies screaming for me.”

“It’s your pussy,” you breathed, the tremors of your release beginning to rumble, “no one has ever turned me on this much Sungie.”

Your best friend had a smirk of approval, curling the tip of his two fingers inside of you. A small shriek escaped your lips, hand flailing from his cock as your jaw dropped at once. Hips bucked up and off the couch, a sinister chuckle coming from Jisung as he watched your hips squirm for him. He was possessed by the way your body reacted to him, reacted to his touch, he did not pay two minds to the throbbing sensation between his legs. All he could see was that you were slowly losing it. 

You did not care. You were waiting close and closer, deeper and deeper, hitting a spot that has never been touched in your life. Your mouth was getting bigger, hips moving with less and less rhythm. There was an impending feeling that you knew was going to happen, it was only a matter of seconds. 

“Sungie I’m gonna-”

“I know baby,” Jisung cooed, eyes fixated on your face, pressing a gentle kiss to your jawline, “cum for me.”

A borderline scream left your lips when your hips plowed to the couch, an rupture of pleasure cascaded of the entirety of your body, legs shaking and howling in pain like they never had before. Your chest was breathing heavy, deep in unison with Jisung’s as he removed his fingers, your pussy aching from the lack of fullness. Jisung leaned over, pressing a kiss to your neck in several places before your lips. He waited until your eyelids stopped fluttering shut for you to see him bring those sinful digits to his mouth, and suck on them, hard, a deep groan leaving his lips at the taste. 

“Fuck you taste good,” he winked, causing both of you to start giggling. 

It did not take long for your eyes to travel to his still very hard cock. Your hands traveled immediately, both encompassing the majority of him before you began pumping, hard. To anyone with an outside view, this was not classy sex. It was sloppy, but the two of you were so high that it was perceived the former way. Jisung needed your touch, you needed to touch him. Jisung wasn’t far off either, and the fact that you were looking at him with vigor, with desire was bringing him closer and closer to the edge. 

“Y/n slow down, I’m gonna cum too quick.”

“No such thing,” you purred, adding your tongue into the mix, flicking your tongue along the slit of his tip.. You leaned over, Jisung resting his hands across your ass as you coaxed one moan after out of him. Jisung’s head snapped back, unable to comply with the amount of pressure he was feeling. In a similar fashion to you, his hips began to buck, tip slipping into your mouth as his sounds got louder, his pleading becoming stronger.

“Y/n fuck, s-shit I’m gonna cum, Y/n I’m gonna cum.”

Jisung’s voice became whiny, the tone music to your ears as you moved your mouth away from his length, bringing your lips to the crook of his neck and collarbone, gently nipping on the soft spot on his skin as his muscles coiled underneath your body, cock getting harder under his hands as he hit his peak. Ropes and ropes of him squirted across his stomach, a deep groan, one sounding of relief bursting from his lips as he gripped your wrist, chuckling to stop you from a sensory overload.

“Holy shit,” he breathed, regaining his compures as he grabbed you by the neck, pulling you into a deep, deep kiss. The pressure on your neck was comforting, a smile turning on your lips as you pulled away. 

“Wow,” Jisung gasped, “That was,”

“What took you so long?”

“Y/n, shut up,” Jisung spat, the fatigue hitting him suddenly, “woah, I’m fucking exhausted.”

“I tend to have that effect on people,” you smirked, the room erupted in laughter as Jisung laid back on the couch, pulling you into him as the two of you looked at the ceiling. Your substance affected mind was starting to wear off, causing your exhaustion tenfold. The two of you drifted off to sleep almost immediately. 

“When I wake up, you're gonna get it,” Jisung mumbled, but you were already asleep. 

Depending on how you felt when you woke up, that would change everything.

[mint-yooxgi]

Control - Yandere!Incubus!Jisung

Yandere AU & Incubus AU - First Person POV

Genre: Mature, Smutty Themes, Internal Monologue

Pairing: Jisung X Implied Chubby!Fem!Reader

Words: 1,658

Warnings: Violent thoughts at one point and implied murder, very smutty themes (he's essentially in the middle of the act with you while this is going on hehe). Mentions of potential kidnapping, but nothing comes of it. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: I'M BACK BABEEEYYYYYYYY!!!! Lmaoo it's been forever since I've posted anything, or at least, it feels that way, so I hope this can satiate you all for a bit. Things have been a bit slow, but I'm feeling good about this one, better than I have been with my writing for a while. Anyways, Feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy!~

The Tenth of The Feral Drabbles

You don’t know how long I’ve been dreaming about this… to complete ravage you and claim you as my own.

A blissful sigh escapes my lips as I look down upon the wondrous sight that is you, naked and spread out beneath me. Months of meticulous planning have finally all come to a head as I run my hands up your sides, caressing your body like I’ve always dreamed.

Finally, you are mine, just as I’ve always been yours.

Long since have I been watching you, keeping an eye out for anything and everything that might spark an interest for me in you. You see, my sort of clientele deserve a certain… care when I decide to take them on. The seduction is all part of the thrill of the game.

But you? Oh, you?

You are most certainly not a game. No… You are everything I’ve ever desired, and so much more…

All of the others were easy to figure out, some flowers here, some compliments there, and poof, I had them right where I wanted them. Yet, you made me work for it. You made me earn it, and by the time I did, I could never hope to accept anybody else but you.

You are now my sole desire in this godforsaken universe. The only one I will ever want. The only one I will ever need.

You see, Darlin’, you have this smile… A smile that just lights up the entire room whenever its radiance graces your features. It’s brilliant, and the first time I ever saw it, I was captivated. The way your eyes crinkle during such an expression of joy set my heart racing. An odd, and rather foreign feeling, as I’ve never experienced anything quite like it before.

I had to have it for myself.

Sure, there’s been other times where my clients have smiled at me - smugly, flirtatiously, genuinely - but none of them were you. You have a certain charm that’s addicting, and I couldn’t help but wonder what that smile would look like gracing your features because of me.

I wanted to make you laugh. I wanted to make you happy. More than all of that, though, I wanted to know what that smile would look like pulling at your features as you gazed down upon me, my tongue buried in that tight, wet heat of yours. Perhaps, even what it would look like as I intertwined our fingers together, hearing you sigh in bliss, begging me for more as I made you come over, and over, and over again. For me, and me alone.

That smile would become a product of my love for you, in whatever ways it could. Soon, it would be only reserved for me, and not that fucking coworker of yours that seemed overtly friendly with you. They really enjoyed cracking jokes, didn’t they? Not so funny when it’s their skull cracking instead…

But, I digress… what I had to do to ensure you fell into my arms after all this time is my own business. You don’t ever have to worry about a single thing.

You even seemed to have a soft spot for animals, so it became nothing for me to start walking the dogs under our care just as an excuse to see you. They love you, almost as much as I do, you know. They know you’re mine, and they’ll protect you, and care for you almost as fiercely as I will now. They know that no one is allowed to touch you but me. We have to protect such a delicate being, after all.

Gentle… you’re always so gentle…

But you have a dominant streak in you, don’t you, Darlin’? You enjoy taking control, especially earlier in the night when I had you in my lap. 

Fuck- just thinking about those plush thighs around me as your hips shifted above my own has me twitching again in anticipation. I can’t get the feeling of your hands off of my skin, your fingertips having burnt trails of passion all over my shoulders as you attempted to ground yourself by holding onto me. I can still see the way your head tossed back in bliss, your movements stuttering as you came just from the friction alone.

You don’t need to be embarrassed. I came, too. I always come, even just to the mere thought of you.

That’s just the effect you have on me.

Oh, but I let you have your fun. I let you take control, and was it ever a sight to behold. To be able to indulge with you in these desires of yours has filled me with no greater joy. Seeing you take control like that…

I was made for you, Darlin’, and you were made for me. Never shall we be parted again. I won’t allow it. You are mine, and I am yours. Now, until forever.

The shock on your face after I told you that it was now ‘my turn’, well… it still has such a warmth building in my chest. It made me think, though, that perhaps you’re not used to receiving the love you deserve. I’ll deal with those other fools that dared make you believe you weren’t worth the same love and care you show them later. Right now, I want to focus on you.

Oh, the way my body comes alive at the feeling of your hands all over me. Every stuttered breath, every whimpered moan, is yours. Your name is made to fall from my lips, as mine is made to be graced by yours. You should know, all of my reactions are of the purest variety I can offer, for you and you alone.

I just hope you will do the same, and from the way your eyelids continue to flutter in bliss, I can tell this will be the case.

That’s it, Darlin’, feel my hands caressing every part of you. Let your body come alight beneath my touch, squirming and begging for more.

I will give it to you. I will always give it to you. Right now, though, I want to take my time.

To think, someone who’s always prided himself on his professionalism could be reduced to mere tatters at the very thought of you. For too long I have been fantasizing about what I would do to you if given the chance - an occupational hazard, if I do say so myself - but never have I ever felt anything this intense.

My life is yours, Darlin’. You own my very soul. Every breath, every thought, every desire I have is yours. Yours to fulfill, yours to own, yours to keep. It always and forever will be.

Yes, feel my lips against your skin, feel the way my tongue darts out to taste your pulse. This racing heart, that hitch in your breath, are all because of me.

I’ve only just begun…

Let my fingers trace over ever dip, let my hands map out every curve. I want to find all the spots on your body that have you gasping, and then I want to make you tremble from the slightest of my touches. Let me please you in all of the ways I know how, in all of the ways that I am known for.

Darlin’, you know my horns are sensitive…

Oh, but you did that on purpose, didn’t you? Your playful giggle says it all. You still want to be in control…

Just relax, Darlin’. Let me take care of you.

The hitch in your breath as you see my fangs only makes my cock ache for you that much more. And that full body shudder at my nails grazing your sides? Perfection.

My breath hitches. You- you’re begging for me? You want me?

Who am I to deny the most beautiful divinity I have ever had the pleasure to lay my eyes upon.

Don’t be shy now, Darlin’. You asked for it.

Just look at the way my fingers sink into those luscious thighs of yours. Fuck- you really are made for me… and this gorgeous, weeping cunt… is this all for me?

All because of me? Darlin’, you shouldn’t have! You know how insatiable you make me.

I swear, you were created just to tempt me. To make me succumb to the deepest of desires so I could please you to the fullest extent of my own abilities. Every lick, every suck, is for you, and I can never get enough of this sweet nectar that flows from your very core, intoxicating me with just a single taste.

Give it to me. 

I want your everything.

You like when I growl against this pretty pussy, don’t you, Darlin’? Well, what if I pull you closer and do it again? Oh, that made you clench around my tongue, didn’t it?

Do it again…

Again…

More…

More! Give me more!

Feed this beast inside of me who yearns for you! 

Yes! Give your all to me! 

Let me see you fall apart on my tongue…

That’s it, Darlin’, feel the way I suckle this sensitive little clit between my lips. Moan for me as I let my tongue delve through those soft, wet folds of yours. Make me drunk on you, and then make it so I can never dream of wanting another. Only you.

I’ll let you in on a little secret… you already do.

Such a luscious body, Darlin’, and all mine to hold. All mine to touch, to please, to sink my fangs into and mark you as mine over, and over, and over again.

That right, grab onto my horns, pull me in closer as your thighs shake around my head. Don’t fucking stop until you’ve taken everything you’ve wanted from me, and then some. 

My body was made to please you. 

That is truly my greatest desire.

After all, Darlin’, you’re the one that’s still in control.

[stay-corner]

im crying. jisung wearing a choker with a heart shaped tag on it. i need him so bad.

–🐿💕

warnings: nsfw, minors do not read! unprotected sex, creampie, hanji wears cat ears and a choker but they don't come into play much, he's desperate and horny and whiny and that's exactly how i like my men, he sucks on your fingers, u choke him, he cries, all that. he passes out a bit but he's fine. overstimulation ig? idk it's also pretty nasty and sweaty

word count: 1.1k words

a/n: hanji anon it has been almost two years since you cried in my inbox about jisung wearing a heart choker and i don't know if you're still around but i'll let you know the recent bow choker jisung incident made me let out an honest to god whimper. so here's a nasty drabble involving jisung, a bow choker with a heart shaped tag on it, and cat ears. jesus take the wheel

[05:31 am - han jisung]

"faster, faster, fuck," he chants in a desperate tone, hands slipping quickly from your hips to your thighs and back up, restless and greedy as he grips your flesh, nails digging in and squeezing painfully. all you can do is moan, whimpers stuck in your throat as you piston your hips on top of his own, legs quivering from both extertion and his needy pawing.

"i'm going... as fast as... i can, ji..." squeezes through your constricted throat between pants, jaw slack and eyes barely keeping open. jisung's so hard and thick for you, you want to throw your head back and fall prey to the enjoyment, but the image of him fucked out underneath you, cheeks flushed, pretty black choker resting on his neck, frilly bow and shiny heart glinting back at you, and the cat ears clumsily clipped in his hair... god, you couldn't have mustered a more erotic image even if you tried your hardest.

jisung bucks his hips up into yours at just the right time, the impact hitting a new angle that makes you keen and pulls an open sob out of him, head lurching off the pillow from the pleasure as his eyes squeeze shut. "oh, you're sopping wet, fuck... fuck..." jisung whines, his high voice reminiscent of the harmonious high notes he hits in the recording booth, now distorted with lust and want and desperation. "please, please, faster, wanna cum so bad," he runs his mouth stupid, brain shut off, and you feel your lungs burning.

"ji, you're so... fucking... insatiable..." you groan back at him, eyebrows furrowing because you're positive that you can't physically go any faster than you're going right now, the sound of smacking skin and wet squelches and unabashed moaning bouncing off the walls of jisung's bedroom. you already forgot how many times either of you came so far, brains gradually turning to mush the longer you pleasured each other, until you were reduced to the mindless animals bucking into each other now, fucking like rabbits.

one of jisung's hands moves down, brushes your clit in its pursuit of rubbing against his pelvis and your thighs, fingers becoming drenched in the mix of both of your slick and cum. he lets out an almost pained sound at the feeling, gaze watching how the substance webs between his spread fingers, and he almost grows cross eyed at the sight, head falling defeated on the pillow.

"that word's too big for me..." he remembers to respond, fingers returning to grab at your body, wherever you'd let him. "it's so sloppy, fuck, i'm... so numb, but it's so good... fuck... make me cum, make me cum," jisung rambles on and on, eyes squeezing and head thrashing from side to side, messing with the ears in his hair, choker straining at his neck. you think it's on a bit tight, but jisung probably likes it. it might leave a small mark, and you clench at the thought.

jisung is still wailing for you, the filter between his mouth and mind nonexistent, and before you think, one of your hands lifts from his toned, sweaty chest, up to his mouth, two of your fingers slipping in effortlessly. jisung responds with muscle memory, jaw falling slack and body relaxing, lids finally lifting as he shows you his beautiful doe eyes, growing glassier by the second. his hands don't flex painfully into your flesh anymore, fingers letting go as he begins rubbing over your torso and legs, mouth alternating between tongueing your fingers and sucking on them.

"that's it.. pretty and brainless for me, ji, hm?" you huff down at him, tone sweeter, sticky and soft for him. it's hypnotic to him - jisung thinks you'll be the death of him, and he's fine with it. "you're fucked stupid, baby," you add, and one of his hands runs over your tummy, catching onto your bellybutton before it descends further, soaked thumb making contact with your aching clit. it's gentle - even in his fucked-out state, jisung knows how to touch you, knows you're sensitive, knows this is enough to make you tighten around him, make your toes curl.

his other hand slips off your thigh, rubbing up his own torso, over his soft tummy, over his raised chest, and finally finds your fingers, coiling them in his grasp and pulling them up, towards his neck. jisung blinks up at you, gaze zoning in and out, and his eyes begin to well up with tears when you finally grab his throat firmly, the feeling of the choker's frilly fabric making the hair on your arm stand up.

"shit, jisung, you're fucking nasty," you mutter, fingers pushing harsher against his tongue as you grip the sides of his throat, and the new leverage allows you to angle your hips better, descending on him harsher, over and over and over again, the sound of smacking skin and wet squelches and muffled gagging echoing against the walls of jisung's head, and he only realizes he's crying when the cold tears roll down his ears, his burning red hot ears.

jisung wants to warn you, tell you he'll cum, but it builds up so fast in his lower tummy, and he sees only bright white behind his eyes as the sensation travels down his legs and up his body, feet clenching and unclenching, hands all but smacking down on you from the sheer force of the feeling, pushing and pulling at once, unsure of where he wants you - he shivers violently, thighs and ass and biceps burning and shaking, his lungs pushing all the air out in spite of the sharp clench in his chest, veins bulging in his throat and forehead and fucking cock, balls clenching as he empties inside you, the pull deliciously painful. your walls milk him too well, and he lets another sob out around your fingers as the tip of his dick throbs, each drag of your pussy sending electric jolts down his shaft, directly into his bloodstream.

jisung only comes around again when you brush his hair off his forehead softly, fingers working the cat ears out of his strands, and tenderly undoing his choker. his ears ring, and he has to relax his muscles manually, body still tensed and jolting every few seconds. you leave a peck on his temple, hand rubbing softly at his throat, down his chest, up to his cheek, and he has half a mind to tilt his head, kiss your palm. his eyes are closed.

"you're so good to me, ji" you whisper against his skin, body lying next to his. you're both sweaty and gross, and jisung is in love with you, so he tells you so.

"... 'm love you."

you chuckle and nuzzle into him. it only takes you two a minute tops to drift off, sweaty, and gross, and in love, and thoroughly satisfied. (for now - he'll agree with you tomorrow, when his brain can finally process more than three syllables at once, that he is insatiable, after all).

sick and twisted. thank u so much for reading, hope you enjoyed! here is my inbox, where you can leave feedback, thoughts, or request an idea! here you can find more of my writing, and here are my guidelines! :> i appreciate every like and reblog and sweet word thrown my way! have a nice (and wet and nasty) day hehe~ - lunar

[niki-phoria]

METAL MOUTH

pairing: jisung x gn!reader (no pronouns used) genre: fluff word count: 639

includes: reader has lip piercings (implied to be snake bites), nervous jisung, not proofread and i don't have any facial piercings so pls forgive any mistakes !!

summary: jisung likes your piercings - maybe just a little more than he likes you.

jisung is staring at you. you can feel it. his gaze never leaves your face as he watches you carefully adjust the thin metal rings piercing through your skin through your bathroom mirror. 

wide eyes meet your own when you turn around to face him, softly chuckling at the way the boy startles. “what?” you playfully cock your head at him; a smirk tugs at the corners of your lips. “is there something on my face?” 

“no,” jisung replies, softly shaking his head. he slips fully into the room, letting the door quietly shut behind him. despite now being face to face, jisung’s gaze still lingers on your lips for just a few seconds too long to be totally platonic.

hesitantly, he raises a hand up until his fingertips are mere centimeters away from the metal. “what do they feel like?” he finally murmurs after a period of silence. 

“i’ve had them for so long they just feel normal to me,” you shrug. “i only really notice them when other people bring them up - or when i’m doing something near my mouth, like brushing my teeth or something.” 

“i guess that makes sense," jisung hums. you ignore the disappointment that courses through you when he lets his hand return to his side - widening the space between you once again. "did they hurt?”

“not much,” you shrug. “cleaning them everyday was a pain, though.”

“sometimes i fall asleep without taking my makeup off,” he chuckles. “i don’t think i’d be able to handle the upkeep.”

“you get used to it,” you smile. “have you ever thought about getting any yourself?”

“sometimes. never seriously though.” 

you nod in acknowledgement, leaning back against the bathroom counter. in the momentary silence, jisung finds himself staring at your lips once again - more specifically at the thin rings looped around your mouth.

“you look really nice.” the words escape his mouth before he realizes what they are. you softly smile at him as his face flushes a bright red; jisung’s mind races to come up with an excuse. “your piercings - i mean.” 

“so you don’t think i look nice?” you tease.

jisung bites his bottom lip. “of course you do,” he finally murmurs. “do they affect kissing?”

you freeze. wide eyes meet your own before jisung quickly takes a small step backwards away from you. he stares down at his feet with overly flushed cheeks. 

excuses fall from his lips in waves before you take a step closer, limiting the space between you once again. jisung pauses when you reach up to cup his cheek with your hand. “i’m not sure,” you murmur. there’s a beat of silence before you speak again. “...i’ve never kissed anyone before.”

“do you want to?” his voice is so quiet you almost miss it entirely. the feeling of your heart beating so rapidly in your chest is almost overwhelming. 

“yeah,” you finally whisper. “i’d like that.” 

your eyes flutter closed as jisung slowly begins to lean in. your breath hitches in your throat from the anticipation before he finally presses his lips against yours. 

jisung’s lips are soft - softer than yours. your bodies move in an unconscious rhythm as you slowly continue to limit the amount of space between you. his touch is gentle as he rests his hands on your waist; your arms snake around his neck, just barely beginning to tangle into his hair.

you only pull away when the lack of air begins scratching at your lungs. you’re all but panting as jisung leans in, resting his forehead against your own. “so?” you whisper with a shy smile. “how does it feel to kiss someone with piercings?”

“it’s better,” he breathlessly chuckles. “way better.”

your rebuttal dies on the tip of your tongue when jisung leans in, pressing his lips against your own once again. 

if you enjoyed this fic, please consider leaving a like, comment, feedback, or rebloging !! and if you want to support me, consider checking out my nct dream masterlist <3

[rrxnjun]

liebestraum [park jisung]

if anyone asked park jisung if he believed in ghosts, he would say yes– for he saw longing grow legs and follow him.

pairing: park jisung x fem! reader genre: summer break au. coming of age, slice of life, angst, fluff warnings: mentions of parents' divorce, swearing word count: 11k (11.190) playlist: liebestraum - franz liszt / the gold - phoebe bridgers / our summer - txt / could cry just thinking about you - troye sivan / burning love - elvis presley / if not for you - maneskin / we'll never have sex - leith ross / christmas kids - roar / raindrops (an angel cried) - ariana grande / ceilings - lizzy mcalpine / the loneliest - maneskin / about you - the 1975

a/n: this is mainly for you, liebestraum anon <3 thank you so much for being the most supportive friend, i really enjoy talking with you. hope the wait was worth it and hope the fic doesn't disappoint. i think that if it wasn't for you, this fic would never see the light of day HAHA

Laying on the floor of his aunt’s living room, listening to the vinyl his aunt popped into the record player just a few minutes prior to leaving the room to get some tea for the guests that are arriving soon, Park Jisung wishes for the ground to swallow him whole and for the ceiling to fall down and bury him in the deepest depths of this house. His head starts to spin as he dives in deeper to the music, the classical tunes almost making him overthink more than he has before. He wonders what would happen if he just left the room, left his aunt’s house and ran away so far no one could ever find him. 

He finds himself fantasizing about stuff like this a lot lately. Listening to classical music– because of course his aunt listens to music from the 19th century, she’s almost as old as the composers themselves– he wonders what came through the mind of the author of the song when he wrote such trivial melodies.

Laying on the floor of his aunt’s living room, listening to the vinyl his aunt popped into the player just a few minutes prior to leaving the room to get some tea for the guests that are arriving soon, Park Jisung drifts away to a soft slumber, deep enough to make him more tired, but light enough to wake him up when the doorbell rings and the obnoxious laughter of his dear aunt pierces through his ears.

His aunt wakes him up with a screech. Frankly, it hasn’t been that long since he’s fallen asleep and he truly doesn’t really know if it was his position on the floor that made her scream, or the fact that he’s embarrassing her in front of the guests by sleeping on the floor in the living room, but nonetheless, he’s quick to stand up and bow to the guests, trying hard to be respectful. 

His aunt nervously chews on the inside of her cheek. Her smile is a little too forced when she introduces all of them to him, but he tries hard to ignore the fact that she looks like an utter clown, pretending her house is a beautiful, welcoming shrine, because laughing out loud at her antics would surely do him no good. See, Jisung doesn't like to anger his aunt. It’s not that he doesn't enjoy the silent treatment she gives him, finally letting him breathe in the quiet– the feeling of suffocating escaping him for once in a while– but he simply just doesn’t enjoy it when she only glares at him and doesn’t speak more words than a single sentence announcing when the dinner’s ready. It only serves to make him feel more alienated.

“Jisung, these are my friends from university,” his aunt recites, sounding rehearsed, and he bets she acted out the scene in her head a thousand times before falling asleep last night, so it’s all perfect when the actual moment happens in real life, “their names are Jinyoung and Nayeon, they met in university and got married a few years later.”

He hums, scamming the adults from head to toe, noticing the neat way they present themselves. He wonders if this is how his parents looked to strangers when they used to visit their old friends. The truth is, they never looked as neat and as in tune with each other as this couple does in his eyes– but maybe he just wasn’t able to perceive them this way due to the image he made of their marriage when they were at home. 

Eyes traveling to the person behind them, the fringe falling to their forehead, he gets captivated by a mysterious look in their orbs, hands hidden in the pockets of their jacket. Jisung’s not too sure if his aunt caught him staring at the unintroduced guest– now, he will admit that he stared at the person, for they were a stranger to him and for no other reason– but he know for sure that they did, from how they squint their eyes at Jisung and offer him a teasing smile.

“Oh, and this is Y/N,” his aunt says, nudging the person closer to his nephew, as if to present a thing meant to solve all of his problems, “their child. They are staying for the summer, so I expect you two to hang out often, since you’re the same age and all!”

Looking at his aunt, a dead look mirroring his eyes, he hears the person– you– with a voice sweet but a little prickly, just like the smell of a Christmas tree his family used to have in their living room during December, ask a question that is easily able to beat him down to the ground in one second, despite not really knowing you long enough to be this affected by a single strand of words plastered together.

“Does this mean we have to be friends?” you say, eyeing his aunt. Jisung doesn't know if you two have met before, because he himself hasn’t been around his aunt this often, but the familiarity in your eyes tells him that this shouldn’t be your first time being around his aunt. He has no way of proving it, and since he doesn't care enough to ask, he may never actually know.

“That’s- that’s not what I was hinting at, but I’m sure you two would make good friends!” his aunt chirps, making him suddenly wonder if her friends even agreed on letting their child spend time with a boy they just saw for the first time, sleeping on the floor of his aunt’s living room. He doesn’t think his aunt actually cares about their opinion, though. He thinks she just desperately wants him out of the house sometimes. Truth be told, he doesn’t blame her. It wasn’t her fault that he had to suddenly waddle into her house, eat her food and sleep in the spare bedroom for the summer– if he was in his aunt’s shoes, he’d want his comfort back as well. She didn’t ask for this. And he doesn’t even know why she agreed in the first place. “You are quite similar and have a lot in common, is what I meant,” his aunt finishes, and Jisung cringes under her gaze, because in reality, how could she even know? 

A sigh escapes your lips, eyes rolling as you look over at your parents and snicker. “Am I at least getting paid for hanging out with this loser?” 

“Y/N, watch your mouth!” your mother snaps, an apologetic look in her eyes. 

Truth is, though, the comment doesn’t affect him. At least not in the way it should– it doesn’t offend him, it doesn’t hurt. Instead, he grins, looking you dead in the eyes, already liking the foreign excitement in his bones that dares to make his life feel much more lively than it has while he was locked up in the spare  bedroom of his aunt’s house.

“I’m Park Jisung.”

Your lips widen into a cheshire grin, Jisung’s surroundings suddenly disappearing into thin air, the adults in their own universe now, not heard of and not seen. Staring you into your eyes for a heartbeat, another few words escape his mouth as a premise, unknowingly setting the tone for the two of you already.

“Let’s hang out. Show me around. If I have fun, you get a tenner. If it sucks, you’re not getting paid for being friends with me. Deal?”

He doesn’t know if it was the money on the line, or if you saw something in him that interested you enough to keep on giving in. And after all this time, he doesn't think he’ll get an answer– it’s too far out of his reach, too far back in history. But somehow, in that moment, you took his hand and shook it, starting off something that made Park Jisung who he is today. The contact of your hand with his felt like electricity to the boy, the sudden courage disappearing right as he feels the softness of your palm, and when your eyes lock, he physically feels his knees buckle under him– that’s the effect you have on the boy.

Your roles are soon reversed when you’re brought back into reality by an adult’s voice, your hands losing contact as you break away, looking at your mother with a glare in your eyes.

“Look, Ms Park has a piano! Go and play something for us, sweetie.”

A pained sigh escapes your lips, seemingly already knowing you won’t get out of this no matter how hard you try or plead, slowly walking over to the instrument settled in the corner of the room, cracking your knuckles and humming to yourself, thinking of what song to play.

“Jisung plays too, actually!” his aunt chimes in, and he sighs, halting in his movements,

because one, he can’t play the piano, and two, the song rolling off your fingers is so beautiful, so melodic he secretly starts to hope that he did.

Park Jisung can’t believe himself in the very moment when he’s standing at the rocky beach with you, clearing his throat and scratching the back of his neck every few seconds in a poor attempt of calming down his nerves and the erracting beating of his heart. He’s only 18 and has no experience with girls, so he thinks this is the sheer effect of the fact that he can’t swim well and he’s afraid of embarrassing himself in front of you– he bets you’re not strong enough to bring out his drowning body out of the depths of the lake anyways, so it really must be fear that’s holding him down from undressing in front of you and jumping into the refreshing water. 

“Come on, Park Jisung, what are you waiting for?” you jab at him, a sharp finger pointing straight to his ribs. Your top is already off, a peach-colored bikini top catching Jisung’s attention that he instantly averts and focuses on the shiny water instead, worried he’d get caught if his eyes lingered a bit more. Again, Park Jisung is only 18 and he barely leaves the house– the only girl in a bikini he’s ever seen were the actors in the movies he watched on TV or the characters in the anime he once binged watched in the middle of the night, and those curves were drawn-on, on top of that. He doesn’t know what to do around a girl, and holding a conversation is suddenly that harder when his eyes keep drifting towards your body.

“I- I can’t really swim,” he mumbles out, another set of scratching his neck taking place, the slowly burning skin on the sharp sun making him shift in discomfort.

“Fuck’s sake,” a curse escapes your mouth, the word catching the poor boy off-guard even more, since he’s not used to anyone speaking in that tone around him– with the exception of his parents when they argue, of course, but he’d rather not bring up the memory– and his big eyes scan you again, surprised and almost a little worried of your next actions, “well, I’m not getting 10 pounds this way, am I? Didn’t know the uptown boy can’t swim…” you mutter under your breath before you shake your head in disbelief and shrug off your shorts, throwing the clothing towards the beach towel sprawled out on the shore.

Now, Jisung tries really really hard not to look at your bum. That would be really embarrassing– truly humiliating– and he’s a gentleman, of course. And it doesn’t make it better that the whole journey here, you were rambling about your day and about how bored you are in this little village, and he found the scrunch of your nose so adorable, because now he has the crushing reality dawning up on him that he’s 18 and finally having a sexual awakening. No, he won’t stare at your body. He’s simply not allowed.

“What are you waiting for? Are you gonna go into the water in your clothes?” you ask again, looking him up and down when he doesn’t move. 

“Oh, I was just thinking I could… you know, stay here and hang out by myself until you’re done swimming, or something…” he says, and the more words that spill out of his mouth, the more embarrassed he feels, because your gaze suddenly locks with his and you seem so amused by his rambling, you find his words so hilarious, he doesn’t miss a heartbeat before he sighs more-so to himself and takes off his shirt, clearing his throat awkwardly when he finds you staring at his naked skin.

“Glad you got the memo,” you muster up, shaking your head in disbelief and tying your hair up into a neat bun. “I swear it’s not that deep from the corners, you’re not gonna drown. Your aunt would kick my head off if I left you here to fry,” you mumble and Jisung hates how it sounds like you’re truly only here because you have to, because the more seconds he spends staring into your eyes trying to predict your next move, the more he wishes you were here because you were only slightly interested in spending time with the new kid in the village– him.

“Alright,” he mumbles, and when he’s finally only in his swimming suit, taking cautious steps and following you towards the water, he finds his anxiety levels rising, because the truth is, he’s never swam in a lake before. Sure, he’s been in pools– but those aren’t so scary. He can almost always feel the bottom of it under his feet and he knows they don’t get as deep. Surely, there is a little to no possibility of him drowning in a swimming pool. Lakes, however, are a different thing. He can’t reach the bottom, and if he does, the surface is disgusting and slippery and won’t help him to his feet– if he really got too stiff and panicked, he could die. And that’s perhaps what scares him the most as he takes the first step on the slick rock at the very edge of the water, the slight stumble of his feet only making him more aware of the reality that’s in front of him.

“You’re such a scaredy cat,” you tease him when you look at him from behind your shoulder, a grin on your face acting like a sucker punch towards Jisung’s gut. And the truth is, he’d be more relaxed if you just gave him a minute– to collect his thoughts, calm his erracting heartbeat as he’d tell himself that there’s nothing to worry about and that the water here truly isn’t as deep yet and the worst thing that could happen is that he lands on his ass, but you don’t give him a chance to do so as your hand slips into his– trying to steady him, as you walk deeper into the water.

Your soft hand in his, fingers intertwined, he finds himself holding on to you like a lifeline– because in his tragic imagination, you might as well be one– and the beating of his heart only gets faster when he gets painfully aware of the sweat pooling in the palms of his hand and the very apparent hesitance in his step. If you notice it, you don’t mention it– to which Jisung’s equal parts surprised and glad, and suddenly, his figure is waist-level in the water before he even has a chance to register it and your hand lets go of his, the momentarily hypnotization of your hold escaping him when he has to face you as he stands still in the cool liquid.

You’re staring at him with a flashy smile, expecting eyes waiting for him to react to you in any way– and when nothing comes, you must realize that he’s too starstrucked by your appearance to muster up anything coherent enough. 

“You alright there?”

He finds himself nodding, a hum escaping his throat to accompany his response. It’s not enough for you, though, and the truth is, Park Jisung should’ve been prepared for this, since even the two days of knowing you must be enough to get to know the true intentions of your actions– because you tease him again, and even though the boy gets sulky easily, he doesn’t seem to find himself paying it much mind.

“A cat got your tongue?” you snicker, shaking your head at him. 

For a second, Jisung debates on acting dumb– maybe more silence or a shrug of his shoulders would rile you up more, get you more annoyed– but he should’ve learned already that you’re always one step ahead of him, in more cases than one, when a splash of cold water hits his heated skin, making him hiss in shock.

Your laughter fills his ears as he watches you stand still in front of him, presumably not expecting much threat from the boy that’s barely able to move in the lake, but the angelic look on your face acts like a dopamine kick for the boy, vitamin D flowing through his veins as he reacts to your teasing with another splash of water, feet delicately chasing you around the lake, screeches coming out your throat like music to his ears on the sunny summer afternoon. 

The water fight ends with him tripping over a stone as he tries to run away from you, and the shock on your face is evident– Jisung finds himself feeling endearment at the hint of you worrying about him– when you rush towards the boy and lean over his body sitting in the water, Jisung’s worst-case scenario coming to life right in front of your eyes. 

“Are you okay?” you ask, a hand offered to him to get him back up on his feet.

And Jisung takes it, only to tug you down towards him, his body shielding you from the impact, but still hitting the ice-cold water of the lake. With your face only centimeters away from his, your annoyed, yet amused face causing him to grin, he finds himself laughing at your next remark.

“I take it as today’s worthy of a tenner then, Park Jisung. Having too much fun, aren’t you?”

To Park Jisung, summer feels like sleep and the humid air in his little room back home. He’s never really been anywhere on vacations or holidays, because frankly, with his father’s nature and his mother’s low income job, there wasn’t really much space to go somewhere and explore what it’s like to enjoy the summer heat instead of constantly angrily swearing at the weather. For that matter, Park Jisung never really enjoyed summer. He was always locked up in that small room, sometimes listening to his parents’ arguing– which he so desperately tried to ignore every time, but his heart did that weird hammering each time his father broke a glass or his mother raised her voice a bit louder than usual– and when his parents weren’t arguing, the house would be too quiet, making him overthink. 

To Park Jisung, summer feels like overslept afternoons and boredom. He doesn’t know any better, and he would even pity himself, but the truth is, he thinks that’s embarrassing. People have it worse, after all– he’s just a teenager with no life purpose. Just like any other, right?

So when Jisung arrives at his aunt’s place for the summer– no longer having to listen to his parents’ arguing, because after 18 years of his life, they finally decided to call it quits and drag their son to the only relative he vaguely knows for the time being, until they figure everything out– he expects nothing more from the old house than what he experienced his whole growing up. He expects overslept afternoons and sweaty pajamas clinging to his back, humid air everywhere and the weird hollowness in the pit of his stomach. 

To his surprise– and believe me, he didn’t really expect this at all– the summer before university is completely different, and he’s pleased with the change. 

He wakes up late one afternoon, because he doesn’t expect anything exciting to happen in the time he spends asleep anyway, and when he drags his feet to the kitchen, body tense and hurting from the weird positions he found himself sleeping in, his mind is instantly sweeped of all the haziness when he founds your figure in his aunt’s house, laughing at the radio host babbling through the device.

“Good morning, sleepyhead,” his aunt greets him from the corner of the room, and he’s suddenly too aware of his bed hair and the fact that his clothing is all wrinkled and his face is puffy, because he feels your eyes on him and he hates to know that you see him in such state. Not that he’s any eye candy any other day, of course– he just thinks you could’ve seen him in a more presentable light, that’s all.

“G’morning,” he mutters as he scratches the back of his neck and looks around the room, trying to grasp the events of 1PM– barely morning anymore.

“If you woke up earlier, you could’ve gone with us,” his aunt chirps in from the stove, swirling something sweet-smelling in a big pot. Her face is fawned over with a glaze of sweat and even the wide-open window does nothing to get the air to clear out– Jisung thinks that’s just the magic of summer. It’s always too hot, and the only thing you can do is complain.

“Where did you go?”

“To the forest,” you smile at him, seeing as he takes a few hesitant steps towards your figure, “we picked berries and now your aunt’s making jam. A classic village-like summer activity, don’t ya think?” you chirp, tugging your hair behind your ear as you pick through the big bowl and put away the berries that don’t look as good, choosing to not include them in the jam. 

Jisung hums in agreement, still a little confused, as he takes another few steps around the room. Looking over his aunt’s shoulder, he sees the blood colored liquid boiling at the stove, the air even sweeter right above the steam, and he suddenly wonders if this is today’s activity. Looking over his shoulder at you, dressed in shorts and a tank top, he shrugs to himself– if it means that you’ll be over at his house the whole time the jam’s being made, he doesn’t mind helping out in the kitchen. 

“Can you wash these?” you ask, pointing towards the bowl full of berries. He nods to your order and takes it over to the sink, carefully splashing water over the fruit and making sure each piece is clean– he doesn’ want to embarrass himself in front of you. Frankly, he doesn’t know what’s going on or how exactly jam is made, but you seem like you’re a regular in those activities– he doesn’t want you to think he’s a city guy with no knowledge of how the world works. Because that’s kind of true, but you don’t have to know that.

Bringing the bowl over to the table again, he watches as you look up at him from the next bowl you’re currently sorting through, raising your brows in question at his stare. The boy almost wants to look away from being caught, but he figures it’s too late anyway, so he challenges you and waits for you to jab at him or roll your eyes. 

Instead, you pick up one berry from the bowl and press it up against his lips, an innocent smile playing with your features as you wait for him to eat it, looking at him with expecting eyes.

“Delicious, isn’t it?”

“Absolutely magical,” Jisung replies, overly-exaggerated, seeing you grin. He steals himself another berry from the bowl, escaping from the playful slap you want to give to the palm of his hand, before he sits on the chair opposite of yours, silently watching you doing your task.

“Now, today’s events might not be as exciting, so you can save your next 10 pounds, but once your aunt’s hands get tired, you can take over and stir the jam while it cooks,” you explain, teasing him with your little inside joke– you’re not actually getting paid for hanging out with him. Not really, although Jisung did buy you ice cream on your way home from the lake the other day. So in a way, you are. Just not with real money.

“So fun!” he says, watching you as you roll your eyes.

The truth is, he doesn’t care much about what he does during the day. As long as you’re present, he’s satisfied.

To Park Jisung, summer feels like overslept afternoons, his little humid room back home and boredom. This afternoon, the smell of berries, the sound of the radio and your bubbly laugh when you tease him joins the mix– and he thinks those overpower the grudge he has against the season with such measures he prays every day feels like summer from now on.

The room is kind of chilly when Jisung rests his back against the tall bookshelf– the side of the furniture, so the shelves aren’t uncomfortable against his back– eyes glued to the pages of the book. He finds himself too immersed in the story to notice anyone coming into his aunt’s living room, too occupied with the sentences to hear the shuffling of your feet as you drag your legs across the house. His aunt always lets you in with no questions– you only knock on the door and smile at her when she opens it, slickly jumping inside and finding who you’re looking for in one of the few rooms of the house– more often than not, you catch Park Jisung off guard, but he is starting to get used to the euphoric surprise.

Jisung is an avid reader. He’s liked books since he was little, and it was the only thing he found himself spending money on growing up. When the amount of books he could read in one month became too big for him to keep buying more and more prints, his mother took him to the town to get him his own library card.

After looking through the bookshelf in his aunt’s house, he was surprised– and a little annoyed– at the fact that there were only romance books in store. He already finished the copy of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy he brought with himself when his parents sent him off, and he didn’t really think of bringing more. Finding his aunt’s bookshelf was like finding a treasure, only if the contents weren’t so disappointing. Still, a romance book is better than no book, he thinks, as he picks a familiar one up and sits on the floor, immersing himself into the story.

“What are you reading?” he suddenly hears, head snapping up to see you watching him from above, eyes skimming through the words.

“A book,” he responds, voice low, before his eyes are back on the pages.

“I can see that, genius,” you snicker, situating yourself next to him and resting your back against the bookshelf, “what book is it?” you pry more, and even though you are almost always the main object of Park Jisung’s attention and thoughts, this time, you are set to the second place as he continues to read the novel.

You are rewarded with silence, a thing that makes your brows furrow and a sigh escape your lips. You’re not used to this kind of treatment, it seems, and when the interested teenager doesn’t give you his time of the day, you have no other choice but to ask for it yourself, no matter how embarrassing it might feel. You’re okay with biting it down– you know he won’t try to tease you about it anyways.

“Jisung, give me attention,” you simply say, jabbing your finger to his thigh.

“I’m reading.”

“I came to visit you!” you act offended, an over-exaggerated sigh escaping your lips.

“I didn’t ask you to,” Jisung mumbles, still reading through the pages, although his focus is now a little thrown-off.

Giving yourself a few seconds to think, chewing on the inside of your cheek, you shrug. “Okay, then. Read it out loud, so I’m entertained too.”

“It’s the middle of the book, Y/N–”

“Come on, I read The great Gatsby before anyway,” you say as you nestle a little in your place, resting your back flush against the shelf again, “read for me so we don’t sit in silence,” you order.

Jisung spares you a glance, a second of eye contact enough for him to be convinced, huffing before he averts his eyes back to the book and clears his throat, reading aloud. 

He doesn’t like to be the center of attention. He doesn’t like it when everyone’s eyes are on him and he feels them watching, he absolutely despises the fact that he’s the only thing you’re focused on as he reads through the words and his voice shakes a little at each passage. He feels his face heartening and sweat slowly forming on his forehead, each of his fingertips tingling with the fact that he’s the only thing you’re paying attention to right now, your only object of interest.

“He knew that when he kissed this girl, and forever wed his unutterable visions to her perishable breath, his mind would never romp again like the mind of God. So he waited, listening for a moment longer to the tuning-fork that had been struck upon a star. Then he kissed her. At his lips’ touch she blossomed for him like a flower and the incarnation was complete,” he reads, and when he feels your head resting on his shoulder, your soft hair tickling the sensitive skin of his neck, he almost jumps out of his own skin and crawls under the ground, because somewhere along the way, he admits in shame, in his imagination, you turned into the main character.

Laying on the floor of his aunt’s living room, listening to the vinyl you popped into the record player just a few minutes prior to leaving the room to get some tea from his aunt, Park Jisung no longer wishes for the ground to swallow him whole and for the ceiling to fall down and bury him in the deepest depths of this house. He listens deeply to the music– the loud guitars and the ringing of the drums, so dearly reminding him of the beating of his own heart that involuntarily matches the song somewhere between the verse and the chorus– and when you slip back inside, carrying a tray with two mugs in the very middle, Jisung’s eyes unconsciously watch you as you walk through the space. It’s a weird parallel that makes him snicker.

“Why are you just laying here?” you nudge him with your leg, his figure limp on the floor. “We didn’t come here to lay around, little boy.”

“Just give me a few more minutes,” he hums as he nods, looking at you from below, the curves of your face and the glow on the tips of your cheekbones making his heartbeat stummer for just a beat, an excited glint in his stomach making itself known when you grin at him and your eyes bear into his with an uncertain feeling of mischief and playfulness.

“Are you mentally preparing, or something?”

“Something like that,” he admits, sighing to himself when you offer him a hand and beg him to stand up with your eyes, your skin soft under his touch when he hosts himself up and stands aimlessly in the middle of the room.

You stand in front of him, stiff, for only a few seconds. The eye contact you share makes Jisung feel electrified, but he doesn’t find himself averting his gaze– he’s too scared that you’d find him cowardly, or too shy to meet your glances. And even though it might be true and your whole existence is of exciting importance to the boy, he doesn’t want to show it to you so bluntly, so he chooses to bury those hints and stand his ground, waiting for you to look away first. He didn’t expect you to take it as a challenge– but when his still body annoys you a bit too much, he earns himself a bump to his shoulder, the contact of your tightened fist making him break into a victorious grin.

“Move!”

Jisung takes a step to his left, seeing as you roll your eyes at his teasing manner– normally you’re the one taking the lead in playful banter, but he’s feeling bold today, energized with whatever spirit– and you notice, hating the way he has the upper hand over you for once, deciding to once again take the matters to your own hands and lead him through the situation, grabbing him by his hand and strongly pulling him towards either side of the room, rolling your hips in your place and jumping around, laughing when he doesn’t seem to obey your strategy.

“Jisung-ah! You promised,” you pout, the soft demand in your tone making the boy sigh in defeat and roll his eyes at you, because if you’re good at something, it’s using your words and taking advantage of his weakness for you. And so he does what you want him to, finally holding you more firmly when his hands miraculously find your waist and he dances with you to the rock music– jumping around and twirling the two of you in the middle of the room, because there aren’t many dance moves you can do to this kind of music unless you’re really skilled– and there it is, the wide grin settling onto your face, like a sweet, sweet reward to the boy.

Because even though you really wanted to have fun with Jisung– to get the promised tenner, you said– your mum didn’t let you go to the party in town, no matter how hard you pleaded and tried to reason with her that Jisung’s gonna be there with you to protect you. His aunt knew better than to believe the claim– if there’s someone needing protection, it’s her nephew, and being the one that’s supposed to do the job might be too much pressure for the poor boy. 

And when you pouted and mourned about the fact while breaking the news to Jisung yesterday afternoon, he found himself promising you that you can have your own party at his house, dancing around and having even more fun listening to his aunt’s outdated records and drinking chamomile tea that’s surely better than whatever alcohol they are serving in the town.

He’s not a good dancer. The music is not his cup of tea. But hearing your laughter piercing through his eardrums whenever he dips you down or does a silly dance solo just to impress you with his playfulness, he finds himself being content.

He hasn’t laughed this hard in a long while. He says it’s because of your outrageous ideas.

Deep inside, though, he knows it’s because of your sole presence.

“You already finished The Great Gatsby?” you ask, your soft voice cutting through the solemn wind. Jisung glances up at you from his spot next to your figure, the two of you sitting under the tree behind his house, silence enveloping you two like a blanket, only disturbed by the chirping of birds and cicadas in the distance. 

He nods. “I’m a fast reader,” he snickers.

“You must have liked the book,” you mumble, your head falling to his shoulder as you nestle in your place a little, the book in your lap still open as you engage in the conversation with him. You’re wearing a summer dress, your bruised knees on full display, and something about the air smelling like strawberries makes him think and wonder of the fact that this feels a little too much like a date, but he’s too afraid to let the thought ring out loud.

“Not really,” he states, “I don’t like romance novels.”

“You don’t?” you ask, the statement taking you off guard.

“No.”

“Why?”

“They’re not realistic,” he mutters under his nose.

“You don’t believe in love?” you ask, your eyes locking with his in a curious manner. The more he bears his eyes into yours, the more he watches as the glimmers in your orbs swim around and hypnotize him, the more he wishes he could say yes, the more he yearns to tell you that he does, he always has and he always will believe in love, but smiling to himself, more out of despair than out of anything, he shakes his head in disapproval and sees the shadow casting over your face, breaking him.

“Why?” you ask, the tone of your voice almost hurt, as if it was a question of life and death.

“Because… it doesn’t seem real. It’s all an illusion, a chemical reaction, even, it’s- it’s not forever, you know? It messes with your brain and makes you feel dizzy for a while, and then after a while, you realize you don’t feel the same anymore and it was all just a lack of judgment. I don’t think love exists,” he says, “or at least, I don’t think it can last.”

Your eyes watch him with a newly found sense, something in your brain turning fast as you chew on the inside of your cheek, and he can see it in your eyes– you want to disagree with him, you want to tell him that he’s stupid and silly and he doesn’t know anything, he’s just too burdened with what’s going on in his life and that he judges everything by the image of love that was fed to him by his parents; the love that didn’t last, the love that didn’t exist– but you don’t say anything along those lines, maybe in a quiet understanding, knowing it won’t change his mind, knowing it’s not your place to tell him otherwise.

Instead, you only bear your eyes back into the pages of your book and sigh. “I disagree. Because, Jisung, tell me,” you say, sighing before you continue, “how could it not be real, when everyone writes about it? When everyone sings about it, yearns for it and so desperately wants it? How could it not last when this book is older than any of us, yet it’s still considered one of the most trivial parts of romance?”

He watches you from above, the crown of your head now in his point of view when he listens to your voice. “You should be kissed often, and by someone who knows how,” you read, “isn’t that beautiful, Jisung? Isn’t that love? Don’t tell me it’s all an illusion.”

Your eyes don’t meet his when you speak those words. Not able to focus back on his own reading, he becomes painfully aware of your head on his shoulder again, the soft tickling of your hair against his neck– and he finds himself thinking that if love is an illusion, a chemical reaction, a lack of judgment, even– if love doesn’t last, if it’s all just a drunkenness that makes him dizzy, he doesn’t mind. 

At the end of the day, what matters might just be the present moment. And if this doesn’t last, he’s content with how he’s feeling for you now– even though it might fizzle out, he’s grateful for the things you’ve taught him.

Park Jisung’s summer is filled with him staring at you in your summer dress, with him watching you when you ramble on and on about something that makes barely any sense in his brain, with you dancing around the room and playing the piano in his aunt’s living room, the melodies sometimes lullying him to dreams filled with your scent and your voice calling from him when he wakes from his slumber.

Your face is the image that fills his brain when he thinks of sunny days, and somewhere along the way, he stopped trying to conceal the subtle infatuation he has over you, for you no longer tease him for his gentle stares and allow him to admire you in silence.

Today, much like all other days, he finds himself in your company. Sitting in the meadow, side by side– you convinced him he’d like the sight, but he finds himself watching you smile instead– the smell of strawberries fills his nose when you take out your lip balm and put it on, your soft lips suddenly glistening with the moisture, a pinkish tint like a subtle overlay over your smile. Indulged into the motion, Jisung can’t seem to look away, and he could play it off as him so desperately wanting to know if the lip balm tastes as delicious as it smells, but suddenly, all he can think about it how he wants to kiss you and how if he doesn’t look away soon, he won’t be able to control the urge.

But Jisung’s always been too weak when it comes to you. Eyes glued to your lips, still talking about philosophical themes the boy could never wrap his mind around, never in a million years, the stream of words is suddenly cut off your lips when he presses his against them, tasting the sweetness off your skin. And his suspicions were correct– the lip balm is as tasty as it smells, yet, even better than he could expect, tasting more of strawberries dipped in honey– but in his mind, the sweetness you and not the lip balm, and when your palm meets his cheek and holds him in place, he feels close to falling apart right in your hold, a fragile pot full of love and affection for you only, eyes pressed shut from nerves.

He doesn’t think he’s a good kisser. It’s his first time and he never really thought about the action before– never had the opportunity or the right person to prompt the thought into his head. He tries hard to ignore the thought of him being bad at the action, because he doesn’t want to ruin this memory for himself, and as you pull away for a heartbeat and then press yourself into him once more, he finds himself forgetting the time, space and the whole universe– there’s only you, you, you.

And he could lie to himself and convince himself that he kissed you just to taste the strawberries on his tongue, but it’s far from the simple reality– he kissed you just to kiss you.

Not thinking of the future this holds to him, not thinking of the fact that one day, you’ll have to say goodbye. Not thinking of much more, not expecting any difference in your dynamic. Deep down, he doesn’t even really want things to change– he likes the stillness, the security it holds. He kissed you just to kiss you– it was that simple. The desire was too strong to hold back. It was gentle, it was sweetness, and he found himself wondering how come it took him such a while.

Laying on the floor of his aunt’s living room with you, listening to the silence ringing in his ears and making his brain wander, Park Jisung wishes for the ground to swallow him whole and for the ceiling to fall down and bury him in the deepest depths of this house. He hasn’t felt like this in a while, too enchanted with your presence to realize the weight of the situation, too immersed in the blissful unknowingness than paying attention to the stresses that even brought him to his aunt’s house in the first place, but his head starts to spin as he dives in deeper to his thoughts, letting the fear swallow him. He once again wonders what would happen if he just left the room, left his aunt’s house and ran away so far no one could ever find him– it’s a familiar tale now, but he’s never really quite reached the end.

“What are you thinking about?” your voice breaks him out of the tense slumber, his eyes growing wide as he snaps his head to watch you next to him, your orbs filled with tender care and worry. The outside world is slowly turning into a little less vibrant one, the summer nights growing colder with the undeniable fact of the season ending soon, autumn taking its place and Park Jisung’s own departure slowly burning at the tips of his toes. 

He doesn’t like to think about it, but it’s inevitable. Maybe he should pay it more mind. 

“Home,” he mumbles, squinting his eyes as he turns his head back straight and watches the spiderwebs in the corner, the weight of his words making the atmosphere thicker. “It’s not gonna be the same,” he adds, chewing on the inside of his cheek.

The silence doesn’t go away as your hand envelopes his, your fingers playing with his in a calming manner, yet still having a playful aura to it as you tug on the joints of his fingers and wave them around in the air, eyes focused on the way his palm fits into yours. “Isn’t that a good thing?” you ask.

“I don’t know,” he answers. 

And it’s true. He doesn’t know– fights and anger and bad temper is all he’s ever known, all he’s ever been used to. The silent treatment and the petty arguments are what raised him, and now that it’s gone, he wonders if it’s gonna make him feel better. The truth is, sometimes, feeling like this can feel essential. It feels safe to be so miserable, for when the bright times of him and his parents being okay and getting along happened, he’s always felt unsure, like the storm was about to happen each time; like he couldn’t be happy for long, because it felt uncomfortably unsafe, having the hunch that it’s gonna get bad again any time. Feeling numb was safe. It couldn’t get worse than that– it’s what made him comfortable with his sadness. 

And if it’s true that it’s gonna be better now, just because his parents are gonna be separated and they’re not gonna be in contact, is it really okay for him to feel happy about that? Is it really the end? The calm after the storm of his childhood and growing up? And is it okay to feel secure in loneliness? To feel okay with seeing his mother wither away and his dad turning to alcohol every time he visits him in his new house? Because he can picture it now– he sees it clear as day, that this is how the situation’s gonna end up, and he doesn’t know if it’s a good or a bad thing.

“It’s gonna be okay,” you mumble, a poor attempt at soothing the boy.

He finds it hard to believe you. Sometimes he thinks you know everything– you’ve seen so much and taught him so much and told him so much about the world. But can you really know anything about a situation you’ve never encountered? 

Still, his hopeless heart swells at your words, the comfort of your hand in his guarding him to reality. He thinks he made you up sometimes– he longed for something to comfort him so hard and for so long that the longing grew legs and followed him around, brightened up his withering days. 

“I’m scared to come home,” he whispers, the tone barely audible in the so still room. He’s scared of what he’ll find. Sometimes he thinks he’s scared of the silence, for he was brought up in violent screams and doors always left a bit open– just in case. Is it going to be fine for him to find peace after the violence?

You lean up and watch the boy with eyes bigger than the whole universe, a soft smile playing with your features when your fingers trail the curve of his cheek. Jisung watches your lips and dreams of them on his, but there’s no use when you only trace the arch of his cupid's bone with the pad of your thumb, voice barely louder than a whisper, as if confiding him in a secret. “You’re gonna be okay.”

And with that, you’re gone. Like a dream. Your touch fades and your scent is forcefully dragged away from his nose.

After a few seconds, you play the piano for him again. He recognizes the song to be the same one you played on the first day you two met– and he wonders if it’s your favorite, or if you just don’t know how to play anything as well. The melody is often slow, romantic and idyllic, but builds into an intense complexity. Towards the end, the initial melody returns, bringing a sense of resolution and tranquility. He doesn’t know the name of the song– he’s never heard of it before meeting you– but in his soul, the feelings of love, longing and enchantment remain as he listens to the harmonies and passionate melody. 

Laying on the floor of his aunt’s living room, listening to the song you play for him on the piano, so many words unsaid but hanging in the air, Park Jisung closes his eyes and feels a stray tear rolling down his cheek. The air smells of autumn when the breeze flows into the room through the open window, making the hairs on his arm stand up in attention, and his head starts to spin as he dives in deeper to the music, the classical tunes almost making him overthink more than he has before. He wonders what will happen if you left the room right now. If he’ll ever find you, wherever you are.

Laying on the floor of his aunt’s living room, listening to the song you play for him on the piano, so many words unsaid but hanging in the air, Park Jisung closes his eyes and lets himself fall into a soft slumber, the same way he did the first time you walked through the door to his life. During the sleep, he dreams of love.

Park Jisung opens his eyes on the last day of summer and feels coldness seeping into his bones. It’s not cold yet, the season hasn’t even ended, but there’s something about the aura of the morning that makes him crawl in his own skin and dread the day in front of him. After today, he’s supposed to come back home– he’s going to leave everything the summer taught him behind, in this little village, with his aunt he’s grown to adore more than he initially thought he could. It’s kind of depressing, if you really think about it, but Jisung would rather not think at all.

He sits up on the bed, burrowing his head into his palms and huffs heavily at the thoughts running through his brain. He’s not a morning person, sure, but he thinks perhaps his sudden mood change is the result of something completely else– something he doesn’t yet know and can’t quite put his finger on, can’t quite name.

Standing up and walking out of his room, naked feet in contact with the hardwood floor, the clique of the door feels unusually cold against his hand when he reaches for it, opening it and getting ready to face the day. He hasn’t said goodbye to you yet, but he knows he’ll have to today. It’s the last opportunity before he walks out of summer break for real, the last opportunity to see your smile and to hold you in his arms like he always yearned for whenever you were in his close proximity.

Yet, as he gets ready to take the first step out of the room, his feet come to contact with something sharp, a block-like object waiting for him outside of the door. Squinting below his toes, he finds a book on the hard tiles, picking it up and moving it closer up towards his nose. Reading over the title and the author’s name, his heart drops to his stomach, an unreasonable feeling of fear settling in his fingertips as he turns the page and reads through the contents, something scribbled on the first, worn-out page of the book catching his attention.

To my Jisung. Think of me when you read through the pages. You said you didn’t like romance novels, but I know you’re secretly a sucker for them. Always in your heart, Y/N.

A kiss mark in bright red is settled below the inscription, the lipstick stain he rarely ever seen you wear does nothing else than makes his heartbeat quicken and his fear intensify. He doesn’t have it confirmed yet, but in the depths of his mind and soul, he already knows– he knows it’s too late and you didn’t say goodbye before you left.

Still, his feet act before his brain does, his blurry vision ignored when he runs out of his aunt’s house and makes a jog towards the one you were staying at through the summer break. He puts on the first pair of shoes he finds at the doorstep and takes off, his aunt’s concerned yells ignored as he clutches the book to his chest, something about the beaten edges reminding him of the fact that it’s the one you always read in the shade under the single tree in the whole meadow, and it’s confirmed when he gets to your house– your parents’ car nowhere in sight, the windows shut and everything so intensely lonely.

And that’s when he allows himself to break– to fold at the grass in front of your house, to open the book and randomly find the sentence you quoted to him once, breaking his heart into a million different shatters. “You should be kissed often, and by someone who knows how,” he reads, and when his eyes trail over the next pages, he sees each one annotated, words scribbled on the sides of the pages, pretty quotes underlined. You left a piece of you with him, for him to keep, and he should feel lucky, for he has something to remember you by even though you’re long gone, but he just can’t get past the melody you played on the piano replaying over and over in his brain, reminding him that 

you left without a goodbye and he doesn’t know what he’s going to do once he moves back home and you’re not going to be there, and oh how badly he wishes you kissed him for the last time yesterday, for he can’t remember how your lips felt against his anymore and he fears he may never feel the way he did when he was kissed by you ever again. 

Rustling through the book, there’s a lone sheet of paper tucked behind the last page. Slowly walking home, head hung low, his eyes scanning the music sheet, the title of the song sits unfamiliar on his tongue when he repeats it under his breath like a broken mantra made to bring you back. 

He promises himself to learn how to play it on the piano one day, just so he could hear it again. There’s an inkling feeling in him that the song might be important.

Wobbling through the classroom, happy that the bell finally rang and he can go home, Park Jisung hears his name called from the mouth of his Creative writing professor, much to his dismay, making him stop in his tracks and follow his voice with a low sigh. It’s Friday and it’s raining outside, meaning that if he won’t catch the last tram home, he’ll have to run through the rain without an umbrella, and that really wasn’t on his checklist for the week.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like he hates this class or his Creative writing professor in the slightest. It’s quite the opposite, really– this class serves good to his vivid imagination and the daydreaming he practices every night before sleeping and sometimes even when he takes a long shower. His professor is nice as well– young enough to understand the minds that are filling the classroom, only getting his master’s degree recently– but still mature enough to lead the class in a way that makes everyone respect him in a healthy way. But today, on a rainy, gray Friday, after the last class of the week, Jisung really doesn’t feel like talking to Mr Kim in the slightest.

“Did you want to talk to me about something?” Jisung asks as soon as the classroom empties itself out and he is standing face to face with his professor. The man nods, taking his glasses off and putting them onto his desk, quickly turning around to his student again and only starting to talk once he makes sure the classroom is completely empty, just to stay confidential.

“Yes, I did,” he says. Humming under his breath as he turns around again, he searches through the papers sitting on the desk, seemingly looking for the ones that belong to Jisung, and clears his breath as he faces the boy again and furrows his brows at the writing on the paper.

“Is something wrong?” Jisung asks, full of concern. The truth is that the Creative writing class is one of the only classes that maintain his grades below the lowest level– the one that gets you kicked out of the university– and the face his professor’s currently making is surely not a one that seeps of satisfaction. It’s only natural for Jisung to feel worried, because with how badly he’s doing in Physics, he surely can’t afford to get a bad grade even in a class that’s supposed to come easily to him.

“No, no,” Mr Kim shakes his head in a hurry to quickly calm his student down, “it’s just…” trailing off, his eyes swiftly moving across the letters Jisung finished writing a few weeks ago, just a day before handing the first part of his assignment in, reading the first few lines over one more time. Jisung finds himself feeling irritated and frustrated, for his professor should be the one that’s good with words, but in this situation, he feels like he’s not telling him anything. 

“What is it, then?” he asks, diving straight in. If he gets it out of him now, he might even catch the last tram, as long as he runs to the tram stop… 

“Look, Jisung. What I’m going to tell you now might not make you happy, but I think it’s crucial for you,” he says, looking kindly, yet still firmly at the boy, “your writing… I like it. Quite honestly, I find it phenomenal. You have a way with words that just… when you explain feelings, you go into depths and details, and I find that really interesting from a boy like you.” 

Jisung doesn’t know what the premise of his words are, and the sudden praise catches him off-guard, since he thought he’s going to get scolded. Furrowing his brows and muttering low words of appreciation, his professor continues with his little ment, finally clarifying his intentions. “But I have an issue with this,” he says, pointing to the papers in his hands, meeting eyes with Jisung again, “it’s not that it’s bad. Not at all, I said what I said, I really find your writing the best in this class. However, I think it lacks something.”

Stepping from one foot to the other, Jisung chews on the inside of his cheek, confused. “And what does it lack, sir?”

“Emotion,” he deadpans, looking straight into his eyes. The words surprise him, making him furrow his brows at the explanation, mumbling in confusion.

“But… but you just said I describe emotions well?” 

“That’s true, Jisung, however… Your works are full of emotion, but I don’t think those emotions are yours. You’re describing something you don’t feel, something you don’t understand, and that makes me feel like you’re trying to sell me something you’re constantly having to make yourself believe is real,” Mr Kim answers, switching his tone into a more considerate one, “I like your imagination, I like the plot, however, this all means that your writing lacks any real depth.”

Jisung gasps at the harsh words, the reality of them making him sink a little in his place. “I thought a lot about the plot and the intentions of the characters, I really don’t know what I did wrong–”

“If this was any other student in this classroom that handed in this work, I’d praise them for outdoing themselves. It’s good. It’s almost perfect, I’d say, and I mean that. But when it comes to you, Jisung…” he trails off again, trying to find the right words, “I think you can do better. I know you can do better, only if you actually cared a bit about the things you write. Did you enjoy writing this? Did you like this work?” 

“I… I did- I think I do?” he stammers, answer sounding almost like a question, 

Mr Kim stares at him for a while, almost as if he’s trying to make the boy realize the lies he’s telling from his own mouth right now, but when it doesn’t come, he just sighs and offers him the papers, watching the boy take them into his hold and stare at him, completely oblivious.

“Jisung, you’re writing like you have to do it. It doesn’t mean anything to you. At least this story doesn’t. And you know, I can see it in your words, it’s- you’re describing everything so deeply and so beautifully, but at the end of the day, you don’t like or care for anything you write, and that’s why it feels extraordinarily empty,” he says, watching the boys eyes widen and his lips form into a pout, nodding softly at his professor’s words.

“Does that mean… I’m gonna get a bad grade on my final assignment?” Jisung asks, lost.

Sighing, Mr Kim shakes his head and gazes at his student with eyes like an endless pool of honesty. “I want you to hand in something else. Don’t worry about getting in the deadlines, I’ll wait for you and grade this at the end of the semester. All I want is for you to write a story that means something to you. Don’t worry about the prompt, even, if that’s what’s making you feel limited. Just make me believe what you’re writing, Jisung.”

Nodding, Jisung finally understands the whole point of what his professor is telling him. Truth be told, Mr Kim is right– he does not care a bit about the story he wrote. While he can admit that he did a good job on it, he did well at writing about ghosts– the prompt for this semester’s final work (they focused on horror and mystery in literature this year)– he is ready to throw the papers into his drawer and never think of them again, for he just wrote what he was supposed to without giving it any minor significance. He might have described the emotions of the characters well, he might have used pretty words and astonishing abbreviations, but at the end of the day, if someone asked him how much the story he wrote means to him, he’d tell them that it mattered to him no more than a homework he had to complete.

“I understand, Mr Kim. I’ll… I’ll try again,” he says, nodding.

He’s rewarded by a gentle smile coming from his mentor, an expression full of understatement and honest care for his student. Taking a step back from him and leaning on the desk, the professor hints that he can go now, offering him one last sentence of condolence before he sets him out of the classroom.

“I’d hate for your talent to go to waste, Jisung.”

Smiling, although a little tight-lipped, the boy slowly walks to the door, nodding one last time before he leaves. “I’ll try not to disappoint, sir.”

The halls of the university are dark due to the stormy clouds shielding the sun from offering the light to the world. Sighing and checking the time on his phone, Jisung notices that he missed his last tram and the only way he can get home now is to jog through the pouring rain. Opening the glass door of the university building, grunting as he puts the hood of his jacket over his head, he runs through the falling raindrops, still thinking of the words his professor told him in the classroom just a few minutes ago. 

Not looking in front of him as he runs, his body bumps into someone, making him utter honest, yet quick apologies as he jogs off after making sure the person is okay and didn’t drop anything, hating the way wet clothing sticks to his skin, making him feel almost a little claustrophobic. In the frantic hurry to get home as soon as possible, the boy doesn’t notice he dropped something on the floor–

the papers containing the latest story he wrote for the final assignment of his Creative writing class. Sitting in a puddle, somewhere in the middle of the street, the letters wash away with the afternoon rain, metaphorically erasing everything he wrote and didn’t care about in the past, moving him forward into a new direction.

Still, he looks behind his shoulder, ready to collect them from the ground just in case he might need them for something in the future, only to find the back of the person he just bumped into running away, a stack of white, water-stained A4 papers in their hands. Their walk is all too familiar to Jisung, the back of their head reminding him of something he’s experienced in the past, the sway of their hips and the jolt in their step making warmth erupt in his stomach at the fond memory that makes itself creep back into the boy’s head.

“It can’t be…” he mumbles.

The thought still fresh in his brain, the speculations making thoughts run around his mind faster than the speed of light, he opens up another Word document on his laptop as soon as he takes off his shoes in his mother’s new apartment, fingertips on fire. To write about something he cares for? Putting his everything into words that would mean something to him? It doesn’t seem as difficult right now.

Ghosts. The topic he found difficult to write about, for he’s never experienced anything paranormal before. He only tried to mimic everything he’s read about. 

If anyone asked Park Jisung if he believed in ghosts, he’d tell them yes, however– for he has seen longing grow legs and follow him. 

To write something he cares about, he decides– he’ll write about you.

He’ll write about the summer that even now, after so many months, feels like a dream.

[scarletwinterxx]

please write more of dad!jisung 🥹🥹🥹

helllooo~ i actually got a few dad jisung requests , apologies it took this long but I finally wrote it😊 hope you like it!

For my other works you can check them out here, and for my other story series’ you can check them out here.

and if you want, u can buy me coffee(totally optional but any donation is very much appreciated!) thank you🥺💛

All works are copyrighted ©scarletwinterxx 2024 . Do not repost, re-write without the permission of author.Keep reading

"What if she cries?"

"Then do something about it?"

"Okay but what do I do?"

You look over your boyfriend and the baby girl in his arms, both looking at you with curiosity in their eyes. "Jisung, that's your daughter. You kept her alive for this long, you'll figure it out"

"Pretty sure we made it this far because of you. You're the brain in this relationship"

Jiwon babbles like she's the one talking to her father, this makes Jisung look down at the baby girl in his arms. Leaning down to boop their noses together, something he knows his daughter loves.

"Stop talking yourself out of getting groceries, it's only a few things and I really need to clean the house, your parents are coming over" you tell him as you put a few things inside her diaper bag, just the essentials incase she needs them while they're out.

When you got pregnant with Jiwon, you admit you felt lost. You and Jisung were still very young. You just turned 20 when you found out, everything that could go wrong already playing in your mind. The only one who talked some sense into you was your boyfriend. Jisung was the voice of reason during that time, he really stepped up and made sure you were taken care of.

First agenda on his list was to get a place for the two of you, the apartment wasn't too big but enough for your small family. The two of you worked remotely so it was perfect when the little one came.

Now your daughter is a year old, she's everything the two of you dreamed of. And even though she came a little earlier than planned, Park Jiwon is the light of both your universe's.

Jisung loved the little human with everything he is, his favorite part is that she looks like you in every way. He must have saved a nation in his past life to be blessed like this, living with the love of his life and the little life the two of you created.

"Here's a bag just in case she needs anything, she got snacks in there. Also packed some for you" you joked, putting the bag on his shoulder.

You laugh as you watch the 6 foot guy holding a pink bag and a baby with the biggest pink bow, "You two are adorable, now go I have some cleaning up to do"

"Wish me luck" he mumbles, giving you a kiss on the forehead before walking towards the front door

"Hey, when someone comes up you and says 'oh my gosh, you're baby's so cute' what do you say?" you call out to him

He rolls his eyes, a smile forming on his lips "She looks just like her momma"

"Damn right she does, now go. Love you both, see you later"

[goldendynastys]

now that we don’t talk | hjs

summary: you can’t help but feel upset and reel about the past after your breakup with han jisung. however, after weeks of reflection and loneliness, you come to realize that perhaps you’re better off on your own after remembering how awful it was being on and off with him.

pairing: han jisung x fem!reader rating/genre: 18+, Minors DNI | modern/college au, angst, some fluff, slight smut word count: 9.2k warnings/notes: 1989 taylor’s version is my new obsession and this vault track has been growing on me so here we are, long-haired jisung brought me here okay, stoner! jisung, explicit language, alcohol and marijuana usage, major angst, reader is going through it, mentions of sadness and loneliness, slight fluff, jisung is lowkey an asshole and a terrible boyfriend, mentions of sex and sexual activities, reader gets her shit together and finds closure, i’m pretty sure that’s it but if i miss anything please let me know (i’m new at this), hope you all enjoy reading! <3

disclaimer: all members of Stray Kids are faces and name claims for this story. this is entirely a work of fiction and by no means is meant to be a projection, judgment, or representation of real-life people. any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real life scenarios.

banner made by the lovely @babystrcandy <3

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It was Friday afternoon, and the last thing you wanted to do was meet up for a group project. You and a few other classmates were supposed to be working on some psychology project, analyzing different parts of the brain and how it applies to the work world (you had no clue, it was only assigned to you Wednesday). Your group was supposed to meet yesterday, but of course, one of the members canceled at the last minute, forcing all of you to meet on Friday. Everyone was pissed, to say the least.

The walk to the library was pleasant, if you were being honest. You always loved the spring, how the once dead trees suddenly sprung back to life with healthy leaves and beautiful flowers adorning the branches. The weather was starting to get warmer, which meant you didn’t have to carry around an oversized jacket and gloves all the time. Thank God, cause it came to a point where the freezing cold was starting to bother you. Now you could wear a sweater all on its own and be completely fine. 

You watched as some flower petals blew in the wind, smiling at the image above you. With an iced coffee in your hand, you walked through campus and made your way to the library. After walking in silence amongst the wind, you realized that maybe meeting up for the project today wasn’t so bad after all. The walk seemed to calm you, help you ground yourself after all the negative thoughts that ran through your head previously. You were more motivated to take on the project and get as much work done as possible before heading into a nice, relaxing weekend away from classes. 

Your group decided to secure a study room on the first floor, since you all could talk freely without people trying to quiet down every five minutes. You saw one of your members, Chae-Won, standing outside a room, to which she greeted you by your name and with a wave. “Hey, Chae-Won. Has anyone else come?” You ask her.

“Yeah, we’re all here. We were doing homework separately here earlier and it took us less than five seconds to find each other,” Chae-Won explained, knowing you would feel bad for being the last one to show up and keep everyone waiting. You both walked into the study room and took your respective seats.

The time you spent preparing for this project went by so quickly, as it was already three in the afternoon and everyone was starting to leave for the night. Your group decided to call it a night, after successfully setting up your slides and actually discussing what the project entailed. You were doing just fine until one of your group members, Alex, decided to mention something that took you completely by surprise.

“Of course I’m going to the party tonight. Han Jisung’s going to be there, and you know how fun he can be at parties. Plus, he has the best weed on campus, and I need to refill my stash,” Alex commented, to which your other group member he was talking to smacked his arm loudly.

You froze at the mention of that name. You hadn’t really heard it in a few weeks, since you didn’t talk to many people and honestly tried to forget everything associated with it. You awkwardly look at your surroundings, trying to change the subject completely.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry,” Alex apologized, proceeding to use your name in order to convey how deeply sorry he was.

You played it off by smiling and shaking your head. “It’s fine, Alex. It’s been a bit since we’ve broken up, so you’re all good.”

That’s right. Han Jisung was your ex boyfriend, and the mention of his name always made your skin crawl. You were trying to erase every memory you had of him. He wasn’t a terrible boyfriend, no, but certainly not the best. You couldn’t help but briefly think back to all of the fights you had leading up towards the end of your breakup, how angry and sad you were with him. You also couldn’t help but think about the good times you shared, cuddling and kissing and everything else that came with that. A flurry of emotions and memories swarmed your brain all at once, and you just had to get out of that damn library as quickly as possible.

“All right,” you clapped your hands together. “It was great working with you all tonight, I appreciate all of your hard work. I will get started on my part sometime this weekend, not sure when. I’ll see you guys on Monday. Have a good night, everyone.”

Everyone said goodbye to you as you darted for the exit. You stopped in your tracks, however, when you heard Chae-Won call your name. “Wait up!” She cried. “Hey, I’m sorry for what Alex said, he’s a complete idiot. He honestly wasn’t thinking.”

“No, it’s cool. Not a lot of people knew Jisung and I were together, so it’s not a big deal,” you reassured her, a small pang of sadness hitting your chest.

“I know, but it still hurts. Breakups are the worst, especially when the guy is a dumbass,” Chae-Won said, and you couldn’t help but chuckle loudly at her comment. “But seriously, men are idiots, and I’m sorry about your breakup. If you want, we should hangout sometime. I know some cool clubs downtown that play good music and have the best vibes. Or we can just stay in and watch movies, it doesn’t matter to me.”

A huge smile grew on your face. No one has spoken so kindly to you in a while, so to hear that made your heart feel warm. You placed a hand on Chae-Won’s shoulder and gave her a reassuring smile. “Thank you, Chae-Won. I really appreciate it. I’ll definitely take you up on that offer, but I honestly just want to hang out by myself tonight. It’s been a long week.”

“Of course. I was the same last week, and I’ll probably end up falling asleep at ten tonight because of how exhausted I am,” she joked, in which you laughed with her. “But I mean it, just text me anytime and we can work something out.”

“Absolutely, I will for sure. Have a good night,” you told your friend as you made your way to the door.

A bittersweet feeling sat with you as you walked out of the library. On one hand, you started thinking about your ex-boyfriend when you really didn’t want to. But at the same time, you had made a new friend, a friend who seemed really eager to spend time with you. The feeling stayed with you as you walked back to your apartment on-campus, stopping by the grocery store to pick up some dinner and your favorite snacks before heading in for the night. You were excited to have a self-care night, focused solely on yourself and resting after a long week of classes and exams. 

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Your night was going completely fine until you decided to redownload Instagram. You had come to realize that despite taking a long shower, doing your nails, and watching a movie, you were still bored out of your mind. Maybe it was because of how early in the night it was, or because you couldn’t stop thinking of Jisung and what he was doing right now. A mixture of both, probably. 

Quickly signing into your account, you became nervous as the screen started to load, getting ready to show you account. Immediately upon looking at your feed, your stomach instantly dropped. Not only was there a new post from Jisung, sporting a new haircut and outfit, but there was also a post on his story. You nervously clicked his icon, revealing a group photo of him and his friends at a party from a few months back, claiming he “wanted to show some love to his brothers.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the picture, as you were the one to take that photo, and you weren’t particularly fond of what happened that night. Jisung insisted you come to this party, since you had been locking yourself in your apartment every night for the past two weeks. You kept telling him no, but he only had to say a few words about how pretty you were and how much he missed you for you to change your mind. Looking back, you hate how much of a pushover you were, wishing you had a backbone to tell him no, especially for a guy who didn’t give a damn about you.

The entire night, you clung to Jisung while he completely ignored you, smoking blunts while trying different alcohol drinks and focusing on his friends. They were chatting about something completely stupid, most likely the new video game they all started playing or how many girls they had fucked in the past few weeks. It left you bored and irritated out of your mind, and when Jisung asked you to take a picture of him and his friends, you took the photo and stormed off.

It was a faint memory now, as they all started to blend together because of how similar they were. Jisung would tell you how much he missed you and how pretty you were, you’d hang out, and he’d ignore you if he was with his friends or at a party. The same routine, God knows why you stayed with him all that time when he treated you like shit.

But you were reminded of the good times when you “accidentally” clicked on Jisung’s profile to see what he had been posting. You saw photos of him hanging out at different places in the city, some of which were taken by you. You also recalled taking numerous photos together, some selfies of him kissing you or your cheek, others of you two just being a happy couple. Those days were the best, as it was just you two doing whatever you wanted and having so much fun. 

That was one of the reasons why you stayed for so long, because of how sweet and caring Jisung could be. You held onto the hope that he would start treating you like that whenever you were with his friends or in more public spaces, but that never happened, no matter how hard you kept trying. 

You couldn’t help but feel a small tear roll down your cheek once you saw some photos of Jisung hanging out with some girls, letting them cling onto him at parties and really starting to notice how much he had changed since you two broke up. His hair was longer, his wardrobe had taken a turn (for the worse, if you were being completely honest), and he just appeared to be having more fun. Especially with the girls on his profile, as you noticed there had been other photos of them together at different parties. You wondered what he did at them, or if he got anxious when he left (since he always told you he was afraid of leaving places at night).

You shut off your phone and you couldn’t help but start crying. You hated how upset you were over this, how you bottled up your emotions and pretended that you were fine, but in reality you were just sad. Sad that you had to break up with the boy you really liked, one that you wanted to have a serious relationship with. You wanted it so badly, and for Jisung to fight for you just as much as you fought for him. But he didn’t, he honestly didn’t care about you that much. Not enough to make him stay.

What got to you the most was the fact that Jisung was posting photos of him hanging out with girls, when he never even posted one photo of you two together. Were you really that awful of a girlfriend? Sure, you had your fair share of flaws, as you were human and humans were not meant to be perfect, but you didn’t think you were that terrible. You were loyal to Jisung, never once did you come off as too clingy or annoying, and you respected his boundaries, never questioning who he was hanging out with in an accusing manner. So why did he treat you the way he treated you when you were together?

You couldn’t help but wonder… had Jisung been seeing other girls when you were together? No, he was not the best boyfriend in the world, that’s for damn sure. But he would never cheat, he constantly reassured you that he wasn’t seeing anyone else and that you were “the only one for him” (which was a total lie, but it was reassuring nonetheless). That was the only thing you believed and remained true throughout the course of your relationship. 

When you two started having sex, you wanted to make sure he was clean and did not have any STDs. You both got tested (per your request) and it was something you took very seriously. Jisung constantly reassured you that he did not have an STD and wasn’t seeing anyone else. And he was right; from the numerous times you had sex or done other sexual activities, you never once got an infection.

Sex with Jisung was one of the things you missed the most about your relationship. Not only because he was clean, but because of how good he made you feel. Always letting you come first, pleasuring you in the right places and not stopping until you were satisfied. There was a day where your roommate went home for the weekend and Jisung stayed over, to which you two had sex basically the entire night, trying out different positions and entangling yourself in each other's arms. You even had sex in the shower, which was a whole other playing field you desperately wanted to try again. And you did, on multiple occasions. 

You missed the way he made you feel, how he made your body feel. And now that he was most likely doing the same stuff you two did with other girls, you couldn’t help but feel a piece of your heart shatter. You hadn’t really processed the breakup until now, throwing yourself into schoolwork and pretending like everything was fine. Now that you were seeing things for how they actually were, you couldn’t help but start crying.

You could feel the tears falling down your cheeks slowly, coming out rapidly and for no way for you to stop them. You deleted Instagram as quickly as possible as you realized you could no longer stay on that godforsaken app without getting upset. You continued to let yourself cry it out, the bottled up emotions finally exploding and flooding from your mind. You laid in bed and just let yourself cry; it was the best thing you could do for yourself at that point.

Once you realized that crying wasn’t going to make you stop being sad, you decided to call your mother. You two were very close and always had been since childhood. You were just so busy with school and her with her job that it was hard for you guys to talk all the time. Normally you try to call each other once or twice a week, more if you both had the time. This week you hadn’t spoken much, just because of your schedules. You figured she would from work, as it was the evening and she always got out early on Fridays. Sniffling, you opened your phone and dialed her number, waiting anxiously for her to pick up.

It took a few rings before you heard your mother on the other line. “Hello?” She spoke in a normal tone.

“H-Hi Mom,” you cry quietly, trying not to break down right in front of her. “Do you have a minute to talk?”

“Oh of course, what’s going on?” She asked, immediately knowing something was wrong. Mother’s instinct, you guessed. “Why are you crying? Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything’s fine. I’m not in danger or anything, but . . . do you remember Jisung? My ex boyfriend?” You ask, making yourself comfortable on your bed and hugging one of your Squishmallows.

“Ugh, yeah. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I don’t like him,” your mother answered, disgusted. You couldn’t help but laugh at her behavior, as you felt the exact same way about him. “Why? Has he done something to upset you?”

“No. Matter of fact, we haven’t spoken since I broke up with him. No I just, I was doing this group project for one of my classes and this guy Alex mentioned how Jisung was going to have this epic party tonight and . . . I don’t know. I logged onto Instagram just to see what he’s been up to and . . . he’s completely changed. He grew his hair long, and it looks like he’s trying out different lives with all the ‘cool’ photos he’s been posting at different places in the city. He even posted photos with some girls, and I guess it just hit me that we’re not together anymore. I’ve been holding it for weeks now and all the emotions are hitting me at once. So yeah, I’m just really sad. I’m sorry to bother you, I know it’s late and you’ve had a long day at work.”

“Do not apologize,” your mother reassured you. “You are completely fine. I’m your mom, I’m always here for you. Let me be the first to say that I think Jisung is a loser, okay? I never liked him, not since you told me about how terribly he treated you at that party and other times after that. In all seriousness, social media only shows one side of the story. I know you’ve heard this a million times, but it’s true. People only post the best parts of their lives to make it seem like they’re cool and interesting, when they really aren’t. Jisung is doing the exact same thing.”

“No, I know what you mean, and I agree with you. It just sucks because he’s posting photos I took of him and he wouldn’t even post a photo of us together, but has the audacity to post photos with two girls? It just makes me so upset. I know I was the one to dump him, but I did it because of how he treated me like garbage. He’d ignore me whenever we would hang out with his friends, get mad at me for being mad at him for being an asshole, and just gaslight me into thinking that he wasn’t treating me terribly, he was just ‘busy’ with school. I don’t know, it’s hitting me all at once and I don’t know what to do,” you vented, wiping the many tears that fell from your eyes with the sleeve of your shirt.

Silence filled between you as you cried, your mother soothing you over the phone by letting you cry. “Let it out, it’s okay. Just get everything off of your chest, I’m right here. You’re dealing with a lot, so just let it out.”

You continued to cry until what felt like forever, and you finally managed to take a deep breath and restart the conversation. “It hurts, and I don’t know why. I guess I still miss him, he’s changed and he didn’t have to. I miss how it used to be. I . . . I wish we could get back together. Start fresh, you know?”

“Of course. I get what you mean, I was the same with this boyfriend I had in high school. I wanted him back, he was a piece of shit, and eventually I got over it. Thank God, cause Ricky turned out to be a complete asshole. He’s also gotten really ugly,” your mother shared, to which you giggled at how she spoke about her ex. “I say all this to remind you that it’s normal to want him back. But Honey, it’s for the best. Jisung was not a good boyfriend to you. Every time you gave him attention and showed interest in him, he’d always blow you off or get annoyed. He wanted you less than you wanted him, you have to remember that.”

You nodded your head, realizing what your mother said was true. “You’re right, he did get uninterested and bored whenever I gave him attention and affection. And then he’d get mad and tell me that he missed me so much whenever I didn’t talk to him for a few days. Ugh, people like that are the absolute worst. You either want me or you don’t, you can’t have both.”

“Yes! Exactly!” Your mother agreed with you enthusiastically. “That’s how Jisung was with you. I mean, he basically faded away weeks before you broke up with him. I know you miss him, but it’s the idea of him that you miss and want back. Not actually him. This breakup is for the best, you’ll find someone who will treat you right and make you forget that Jisung even exists. I know it doesn’t help much, but trust me, it is true. And it will happen.”

“It does help. I’m so young, I have so much to look forward to and crying over a stupid boy is so pointless. Well, not pointless, but you know what I mean. I think I’m okay now, I’m just going to remind myself whenever I get sad that it’s for the best and it’s okay to feel the way I’m feeling. I just need to remember that Jisung is an asshole and I deserve better,” you told your mother, but mainly to yourself since you’re coaching yourself through your emotions. “Thank you for listening to me, Mommy. I appreciate it so much.”

“I’m your mom, Honey. I’m always here for you, no matter what. I’m glad you’re feeling better and that you’re actually processing your emotions. It’s not good to bottle them up, you know,” your mother reassured you. “Take it easy for the rest of the night, okay? Watch a movie, have some ice cream, read a book. I don’t know, whatever is going to help you relax. Call me if you need anything, okay?”

“For sure, I’m just so grateful for you and everything that you do for me. Thank you,” you thanked her. “I think I’m going to put on a movie and eat some ice cream. Should I watch When Harry Met Sally or 10 Things I Hate About You?”

“Ooh, they’re both so good. Um, I’d have to say When Harry Met Sally. Classic, can never go wrong with it,” your mother answered. “I gotta run, your father wants to watch a show before we go to bed. Call me if you need anything or if you still want to talk, okay?”

“Okay Mom, I will. Tell Dad I say hi and that I miss him! I love you, talk to you soon,” you answered.

“I will. I love you more, goodnight,” she spoke.

“Goodnight,” and with that, you both hung up the phone.

You took a deep breath before sighing. It felt good to get that off your chest, as it had been weighing on you for so long. You felt a bit better, a sense of clarity washing over you as you got organized for the movie you were about to watch. Of course, you were still upset about Jisung and a small part of you still wanted him back, but that was a natural part of a breakup. Of course you wanted him back, it had only been a few weeks since you broke up, so it was normal for you to miss him and want to get back together. You knew you would get over this eventually, you just needed time to let out your emotions and process them. 

You’d be the person you were before you dated Jisung and you started to look forward to finding yourself again. A small smile arose on your face as you turned on the television and got your movie ready, excited for a nice, relaxing weekend.

──────────────────────

The weekend was a relaxing time for you, a peaceful weekend you really needed. You finished that movie you told your mom you were going to watch (and it was amazing, as always) and then you decided to go to bed for the night. It wasn’t hard for you to sleep with all of your Squishmallows and stuffed animals surrounding you. You had a great night's sleep, to put it simply, and it prepared you for the nice weekend ahead.

You only had a little homework left to complete, just the slides for your project and a quick quiz to take (to which you got a one hundred percent, per usual). You did that fairly early in the day so you could have the rest of the day to do whatever you wanted. Rather than wallowing in your apartment all day, you decided to explore the city and go to different places you hadn’t been before. You had put on a cute outfit, one that made you feel confident and fashionable. You wanted that boost after how low you were feeling last night, and you hadn’t worn something cute in a while, so you figured this would be the perfect time to do so.

You traveled to different vintage shops and bookstores, looking for little trinkets to put in your room. Eventually you found some cool little plates and small, aesthetic photos to put on your wall and bookshelf. You even found a vintage vinyl record and a new book to read, so all in all, it was a successful day. You went to a new cafe you had been wanting to try for a while now, but hadn’t had the time because of school and . . . well, doing whatever Jisung wanted to do. 

You tried to block him out of your thoughts, especially since you wanted to heal from the breakup and move on with your life. And you were successful, for the most part. It was the little things that made you think of Jisung, such as wanting to tell him all about the new book you found or wanting to take him to the coffee shop and antique store you went to. But you quickly reminded yourself that the breakup was for the best, and that whenever you gave Jisung so much attention, he’d want you less and less. That helped you stop and reset your mind, and it worked for the majority of the day.

After your adventure, you decided to head home, get some good food from the campus dining hall, and watch another movie. You loved watching movies and rating them on your Letterboxd account, it was a hobby you found pleasurable. Being able to rate movies and see what others thought about it, especially the ones that left funny reviews. You tried to leave funny ones that you saw on Twitter and TikTok, but they were not nearly as great or creative as what other people wrote. Still, it was a fun thing to do.

You quickly placed your bags on your bookshelf and made your way to the dining hall. Though you lived on-campus, it was still a far walk because you lived on one side and the dining hall was on another, so you wanted to make sure you got there on time. And you certainly didn’t mind it on this gorgeous afternoon. It didn’t take you as long as you thought and you had plenty of time, but you wanted to make sure you weren’t being rude by showing up ten minutes before the dining hall closed. You just wanted to be courteous to the staff who worked long hours in the cafeteria.  

You noticed you had gotten a text from your mother, to which you pulled out your phone and tried to read what it said. However, you collided with someone, in which both of you stumbled backwards with a gasp. Luckily, neither of you had a drink in your hands, so no one’s clothes got stained with various liquids. That was always a plus. Nothing else fell, either, which was an honest relief. You could not afford to get your phone screen fixed nor could you buy a new one, so it was just a matter of running into someone while you weren’t looking.

“Sorry about that, I . . .” the voice trailed off, in which it belonged to Hwang Hyunjin, a friend of Jisung's who just so happened to be heading to the dining hall at the same time you were. He proceeded to say your name in a confused manner, surprised to see you out and about.

“Hyunjin? Hey, how are you? It’s been a while,” you asked with an enthusiastic smile. You always liked Hyunjin, as he was very nice and made you feel welcome within him and Jisung’s friend group. More than Jisung, if you were being honest. 

“I’ve been good, yeah just busy with school and studying. I’ve been trying to paint more when I have the time and it’s coming along really nicely,” he explained, which made you happy to hear. Even if you and Jisung were no longer together, you had a soft spot for his friends and wished them nothing but the best. “H-How have you been? None of us have heard from you in, like, weeks.”

A puzzled look arose on your face as you processed the question. Did Jisung not say anything? Why didn’t he tell his best friends that he and his girlfriend broke up? After all, all of you spend a good amount of weekends together, going out to dinner or hanging out at parties. Why wouldn't Jisung come clean? Unless he didn’t care to tell them and just assumed they would figure it out on their own, which hurt more than you thought it did, but maybe it was for the best. Let the boys think you turned into a mystery, it made you feel cool and interesting.

You took a deep breath before breaking the news to Hyunjin, wanting to prepare for the awkwardness that would come afterwards. “Uh, yeah. I got really busy with school and stuff, but um . . . Jisung and I aren’t together anymore. We broke up. That’s the main reason for why you all don’t see me around anymore.”

There was a pause, the Hwang boy taking in everything you told him. He looked shocked, to say the least, as he figured you were just busy with school and didn’t have the time to party. But he thought wrong and did not expect for you and Jisung to break up. He couldn’t help but let out a sigh. “Shit. I-I didn’t know,” he continued by mentioning your name in a serious and caring manner. “I’m sorry, that’s awful. Can I ask why? if it’s too much, you don't have to share—”

“No it’s okay, Hyunjin. Really, it’s fine. We just don’t have anything in common and I wanted to focus on school and finding an internship,” you admit. You couldn’t pretend it was for platonic reasons, as your relationship just ended and you could not fathom being Jisung’s friend right now. “So yeah, I ended things a few weeks ago. I’m doing okay, I just spent the day in the city and went to some really cool stores. You’d really like the antique shop I went to, they have a lot of paintings you would think are cool.”

Hyunjin nodded his head sympathetically. “That’s cool, I’ll definitely check it out when I have the time. I’m just busy between school and extracurriculars, it’s chaotic,” he commented. “But I’m sorry to hear that, you guys were cute together. Do you think you guys could ever be friends? We miss having you around and would love to keep hanging out with you.”

“If I’m being honest, I don’t think so. There’s just too much that happened and I’m not even sure if Jisung and I could even be friends given our history. And in general, too, since we’re complete opposites,” you sadly explained. It was true: you and Jisung were too different and you could not be his friend. If you couldn’t get along romantically, then how the hell were you two supposed to get along as friends? You’d rather play it safe and just not be friends with him. You wanted to be as far away as you could be from the Han boy, especially since you wanted to heal and prioritize yourself from now on.

You could tell Hyunjin was upset, since he liked hanging out with you and everyone else. It hurt your heart, but it was for the best. Who knows, maybe you could put this behind you one day and be friends with them again, Jisung included. But right now, it just hurt too much, and it would be better for your mental health if you kept your distance from Jisung and his friends. 

“I understand, you gotta put yourself first and do what’s best for you. I respect that,” Hyunjin explained. “But we’re always here for you if you change your mind. We can deal with Jisung, we can even kick him out of the house for the night and make him hang out with his other friends while you hang out with us. Only if you want though, it’s just an option in case you ever wanted to.”

You laughed at his idea. “Thank you, Hyunjin. I really appreciate it. You’re so kind, so sweet. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.”

“Of course. I always got your back,” he reassured you, adding your name to the end of his sentence to make sure you knew he meant what he said. “I have to run to the library before they close to print something. I’ll see you around?”

You nodded your head and started to make your way toward the dining hall. “Yeah, I’ll see you around. Bye, Hyunjin.”

He called out your name while he waved goodbye, and with that, you parted ways. You wanted to cry, the moment you shared was so sweet and it made you sad that you could no longer be friends with Hyunjin and the rest of Jisung’s friends. They were such a great group of guys, even when they were annoying, they always managed to make you laugh and include you in everything when you were all together. It was for the best, but you knew you were going to miss having a big group of friends who really cared about you.

It was almost as if a lightbulb had turned on in your head. You were sad about not being able to have friends, but you realized that your only friends were your boyfriend’s friends (you are an antisocial person who has had trouble making friends at your school). Meaning, you were sad about not having friends, but it was up to you now to go out of your comfort zone and start trying to make friends. Sure, people were probably settled in their friend groups by now, but you truly did not give a fuck. Surely there had to be people out there who were looking for friends too or simply did not stick to one friend group. You just had to put yourself out there and just find the right people.

It was going to be hard for sure, as you don’t make best friends five minutes into meeting them, but you were looking forward to the journey and who you would meet along the way. You decided to eat your dinner before making any action steps towards your plan because you were starving and had to get food before the dining hall closed. Once that was taken care of, you walked back to your apartment as quickly as possible.

You sat on your couch and decided to give Chae-Won a call. She had given you her number before you left the library on Friday, saying how you could reach out to her if you ever wanted to hang out. So, in honor of starting your journey to finding friends, you decided to act on it and dialed her number. It took a few rings before she answered, and you were nervous to talk to her, but ready nonetheless. “Hello? Who is this?”

“Hey, Chae-Won!” You greeted her and let her know your name. She excitedly said hello and was happy that you called. “Yeah, I am too! I was just wondering . . . are you going anything tonight?”

And from there on out, your world was about to shift on its axis for the better.

──────────────────────

Six months had passed since everything that happened, and you were in a much better place than before. A lot had happened in a short amount of time — some great things, the others mundane. It didn’t matter, because you were thriving. 

The phone call you shared with Chae-Won was what started it all, really. You had asked her if she wanted to hang out that night, and she was very happy that you asked her that. You ended up staying at her apartment for the night and had a blast, watching movies and drinking good drinks. You talked about what you both liked to do for fun and what other classes you were taking, and it turned out you two liked similar things. You loved watching movies and rating them on Letterboxd, you loved music, and you loved exploring the city. You both could tell from that night a special friendship had begun to blossom.

You continued to make friends through your classes while also prioritizing yourself and your mental health. You only did things you wanted to, knew when your social battery was draining and went home to recharge, and you started to journal to reflect on your life and try to better understand who you were. These methods have helped you greatly and continue to do so to this day. You have learned a lot about yourself and have grown in so many ways. You were proud of how far you had come, to say the least. 

In addition to Chae-Won becoming a very close friend of hers, you also met some friends outside of your major and in extracurriculars. It was a bit hard at first, as Chae-Won was your only friend and it was challenging to meet people when they already had their established friend groups. You were lonely, but making an active effort into meeting people. Eventually, your hard work paid off and you started meeting people like yourself. They had friends, but not a tight-knit friend group who did everything together. Turns out, the friends you were meeting were also friends with Chae-Won, and a little group formed between you four. 

You started doing small things, like going over to each other’s apartments to hang out and watch movies. As you started to become closer, you started to visit the cool clubs Chae-Won mentioned during your meeting for that group project (to which your group got an A, courtesy of you two working your asses off you make sure it was good) and other spots recommended from strangers you met on your outings. You always had a good time together, and even aside from them, you liked the girls and boys you befriended even outside of the friend group that you would occasionally do things with. 

Who knew that by actually leaving your bedroom and putting yourself out there would cause you to meet people and make friends! (Those were the exact words your mother used when you called her to tell her the news about meeting new friends and taking better care of yourself. You still laughed about that, even now, but your mother was absolutely right. When was she ever wrong)?

On top of learning about yourself and meeting new friends, you also acquired a summer internship in the city. You did some advertising work for a computer company, making sure their ads were effective and how to best get people to buy their products through the use of visuals. This was the reason why you were a marketing major and a psychology minor: to do work like this. It was the best of both worlds and you got to do something you loved, which was something you were very serious about. If you didn’t love the work that you did, then you would’ve been miserable and you simply could not have that.

Your new friends didn’t live too far from the city, so they came and visited you whenever they could on the weekends and you did whatever you wanted, since it was summer and there were no classes. The summer was perfect overall: you had a great job, you met amazing friends, and you were in a better place than you were in the winter. It was interesting to see how things became full circle, you honestly thought you would never see the day.

But even with this healing journey and getting to a better place, you couldn’t help but think about Jisung every so often. You didn’t miss him, no . . . did you? You couldn’t tell. You missed hanging out and being in a relationship with him, and he wasn’t the worst boyfriend on the planet, so it wasn’t like you were running back to a completely terrible situation. But then you remembered all the bad stuff that happened within it, and then you were torn. You were in a much better place mentally from when you first got together and broke up, so the idea of trying it again didn’t seem so terrible. You would only reconsider it if you were to run into him on campus and have an actual conversation. Perhaps that would give you the clarity you had been looking for. 

And that day surely came when you least expected it. It was around the third week of classes, and you were heading to one of your advertising classes when you heard someone call out your name. You looked up in confusion, as no one has ever yelled out your name like that before. Curiously, you tried to search for whoever said your name, which didn’t take you long because once you saw the figure of Han Jisung, with his long hair and interesting choice of clothes, you immediately knew it was him. 

Your legs and body froze as you watched him walk towards you. You did not know what to do — part of you wanted to blow him off and say you were running late to class, but the other side of you wanted to talk to him, to see how things were. You had no idea which choice was the right decision. You were scared you were going to immediately forgive him and forget everything that happened between you two, and you didn’t want that. At least, you didn’t think you did.

Your mind became filled with a tornado of thoughts once Jisung approached you. He had that signature smile he always gave you whenever he greeted you. Butterflies erupted in your stomach simultaneously, and it was almost as if you had forgotten how to speak.

“Hey, Sunshine,” he greeted. “It’s been a while, how are you? How was your summer?”

You stared at him for a brief moment before collecting yourself. You can do this, you said to yourself. Just talk to him how you would talk to your friends. “Jisung, hey! I’m . . . I’m doing well. Yeah, I stayed in the city to do an internship and it was great. H-How about you?”

“Oh it was great, I did some work for this tech company, mainly coding and shit. It wasn’t bad, but I’d much rather be listening to music and chilling, you know,” he explained nonchalantly. 

“Ah, yes. You always said music and relaxing were way more fun than studying and classes,” you commented, in which he laughed. You recalled many times when you would hang out with him on the quad after your classes while he skipped his and listened to some songs that you thought were just God-awful. You didn’t even know what genre they would be considered, that’s how bad it was.

“And I still believe it’s true. That and doing it with someone you like or are close with, those three things are what make it perfect,” Jisung laughed again. “Do anything fun over the summer?”

“Yeah, I hung out with some of my friends who live close to the city. They’re all in different majors, but they’re really nice. Other than that, I just went to visit home a few times,” you answered.

“That’s nice. How’s your mom doing?” He asked.

She thinks you’re a loser, you thought to yourself while you tried to hide your smile. You couldn’t help but think back to what she said all those months ago, and how she probably felt the same way today. You shook your head, “she’s doing great, I’ll tell her you say hi,” you reassured. “How was your summer?”

“Oh it was fine. Boring, but fun. Went to a few parties, smoked a lot and just had a good time with my friends from home. I missed the guys though, we only saw each other once. I’m glad we’re together again,” Jisung explained and you just nodded your head. 

You were happy his summer wasn’t terrible. Certainly you wouldn’t have wanted to have been together; him dragging you to parties and completely ignoring you while hanging out with his friends was the definition of hell for you. You were glad that he had his fun and you had yours.

There was an awkward silence between you, like there was something that wanted to be said but neither of you could say anything. You briefly glanced at your phone and saw that class was starting in ten minutes, and it was then that you decided to break the silence and speak. “I gotta get to class in ten minutes, it was nice running—”

“I miss you,” Jisung blurted out, which made your stomach drop. You could feel your chest tighten as you anticipated his next words. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot and I . . . I just miss you and being with you. I know we haven’t talked in, like, months, but I miss you. Do you want to get coffee this week and talk about this more?”

And there it was. This was what you were waiting for, now and when you two first broke up. You had hoped it wouldn’t, but it was inevitable at this point. You eventually had to talk about it. And you just stood there, staring at him and admiring his beauty. His hair was still long, hidden in a black beanie with a pair of headphones resting on his neck. Han Jisung was an attractive person, there was no denying that. 

He sounded genuine, with his words. He wanted to talk about your relationship and how to move forward, to get back together. He wanted to be with you. Your old self wouldn’t even give it a second thought and immediately say yes. She would have wanted this for you. But now, you weren’t sure.

You thought about the nights you spent crying over how he treated you at a party, or when he wouldn’t text you back but would post back-to-back on his Instagram and Snapchat stories. You thought about how every time you put so much energy into him and your relationship, he would give less back and would get annoyed. When you gave less, he claimed he missed you and wanted you to spend time with him. You never knew which Jisung you were going to get: the kind Jisung, who was the one who made you want to be his girlfriend in the first place. Or the asshole Jisung, who ignored you and got annoyed at you for simple actions. 

The whole relationship drained you. A constant battle of he’s such a great boyfriend, I love him or he’s the worst person ever and I can’t believe he’s treating me this way. Jisung seemed like he wanted things to be different this time around, with his serious face and tone of voice. But how do you know if it was sincere? Was he just saying it to get back together and then would repeat the same actions later on?

And when you thought about your relationship more, you realized there were some things you could stop pretending to like. Jisung’s music taste, for example. You always told him it was cool and unique, but you honestly hated it. Now that you weren’t together, you didn’t have to pretend to like his shitty music. And you also didn’t have to pretend that you liked going to parties with him, while he ignored you the entire night and focused on his friends doing the stupidest things ever. You realized you didn’t have to pretend to like things for the sake of making other people happy. 

And man, was that feeling life changing.

You couldn’t help but think about the good parts of your relationship, too. Your hangouts in the city, in your bedroom��s, watching movies and having sex whenever you could. They were all great memories most definitely, but memories that were not worth getting back together for the sake of being together.

The healing journey you went on (and were still currently on) made you into a better person. You turned into a shrouded mystery, completely reinventing yourself and changing your outlook on everything. You became unrecognizable, similar to how you were before you met Jisung. Turning into a shrouded mystery and going through that painful start of your journey was the only way back to your dignity. And that was simply something you could not afford to lose again, you couldn't risk losing all of that hard work you did.

You took a deep breath in before giving Jisung your answer. “Jisung, I . . . I can’t. We . . . the way you treated me was just awful. I really let you walk all over me and I am not going to do that again. I know you’ve probably changed and won’t do it again, but I just can’t. The breakup sucked and it took me a long time to get to where I am now, and I can’t destroy the progress I’ve made. I’m sorry, but I don’t think it’s a good idea if we get back together.”

You watched Jisung’s face fall as you explained your answer. You hated hurting people, but you had to do it for yourself. “I completely understand. I’m really sorry for how I treated you, I am. I feel terrible for the way I acted and how I made you go out when you didn’t want to. I don’t know what I was thinking, but you deserve a lot better than me. And I will forever be upset over how I treated you and let an awesome girl go.”

His apology warmed your heart a bit; it was good to have an actual apology for how awful you had been treated, it healed a small part of your heart. “Thank you, Jisung,” you thanked him quietly. “I’ll always be thankful for you and our relationship. You taught me a lot and it honestly helped me go out of my comfort zone. If it weren’t for you or our break up, I wouldn’t have changed and be the person I am today. So thank you for that, truly.”

A sad laugh escaped his lips. “Glad I was actually able to give you something great,” he spoke quietly, in which his words made you smile slightly. “Do you think we could be friends?”

You hesitated to answer at first, but you eventually found the right words to say. “Um, not right now, no. I think I just need to focus on myself and figure out what the hell I’m doing with life and everything. Being friends could turn into something else that I do not have time to worry about nor do I want to worry about. Plus, I am just really busy with school and homework, so I wouldn’t be able to hang out much,” you explained. “It’s not entirely out of the picture, though. Once I’m in a better place with myself, I don’t see why not. You’re a kind and funny person, Han Jisung. I want those kinds of people as my friends.”

Jisung nodded his head. “Yeah, I understand. Take as long as you need. It doesn’t matter if you decide by seventy-five that you are ready to be friends, I will gladly welcome you with open arms. That is, if I’m not in a nursing home by then. We’ll figure it out once we live next door to each other and have to figure out how to convince the nurses to give us better cafeteria food.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at his comment. Aside from your relationship drama, Jisung was a good guy who knew how to make people laugh and was very sincere. You were glad you were able to talk to him like this, even if it was for the last time, and leave things on a positive note. You looked down at your watch and saw that you only had five minutes until you had to get to class. “Listen, I really have to make it to this class, this professor is very strict on locking the doors right when the class starts. I’m happy we were able to talk, Jisung. I am glad you are doing well and thank you for . . . this. I don’t know how to describe it.”

“No worries, I get what you mean. I’m happy that you’re doing well, too,” he said. “I’ll see you around, Sunshine.”

And with that, Jisung turned around and made his way to another building on campus. You made your way into your classroom building and wandered the halls until you entered class and took your seat. Sitting down forced you to reflect on your conversation with Jisung, and how you were able to get the closure you needed.

You had been waffling earlier if you two should get back together now that you were in a good place. You could set necessary boundaries now that you were a more confident person. However, you decided against it and told Jisung that you did not want to get back together with him. From what he told you and your own realizations, you realized you would be better off staying single and focusing on yourself and your studies for a little while. 

And with that came a happy feeling within your mind and body. You made the right decision, a decision that was going to best benefit you in the long run. A sense of peace had washed over you, and you couldn’t help but smile as you opened your textbook and began to take notes on your lecture, knowing that everything was going to be okay no matter what happened to you in the years to come. 

[slytherinbangchan]

Inked Dreams (NCT Dream Tattoo Artist!Au) (M)

Chap 2 out of 6 -> Second arc: Tattoo apprentice Park Jisung x tattoo artist female reader.

>>Inked Dream's Chap 1 here

Summary: A NCT Dream Tattooist!Au where the Dreamies are college's heartthrobs and most likely will steal your heart whenever you less expect it.

Cute, shy but very hot, flirty Jisung. A deadly combo, I promise.

Inked Dreams Masterlist~ Blog's Masterlist~

[2nd Arc: Seven Days. ("A Week" 없어.)🐹 Chap 2.]

“Noona.” Jisung calls you. “You look worried.” He says as he looks at your phone and then back at you. “Ah, it's nothing. I was just talking to Renjun about our schedule.” You say, putting away your phone and he nods. “Okay.” “Unnie~ I'm done with my chores, can I leave for today?” Seonhui interrumps. “Why are you calling her unnie?” Jisung asks her before you can answer her question. He sounds a bit sulky about it. “She said it was okay since you call her noona too.” Seonhui informs him and he kinda pouts and scrunches his nose.

Ugh, cute.

You smile to yourself and sigh before finally answering Seonhui's question. “Yes, you can leave. I have something to do with Jisung anyway.” You say and he blushes lightly, so you chuckle. “Your piercing.” You clarify and he blushes even more. “Y-yeah, I know...” He says as he ruffles his hair and Seonhui rolls her eyes at him. “Well, see you on Monday unnie~” She hugs you goodbye before walking away and you chuckle softly. “She's cute, right?” You ask Jisung and he scoffs. “I guess.” He says, still a bit sulky, and you bite your lip not to smile. “I see. Well, let's get you your piercing, yeah?” You tell him, motioning him with your head so he follows you.

“Where do you want it? You haven't told me yet.” You ask as you chuckle softly. “Middle tongue.” He says and you smile to yourself as you wash your hands and get some gloves. “Oh really? Are you sure?” You ask as you smirk and he nods a bit confused by your question. “Okay, give me a second.” You poke around the cabinets as he watches you. “Here.” You hand him the antiseptic mouthwash. “Use it, I'll get everything ready in the meantime, yeah?” You tell him and he nods, leaving to the bathroom to be back after a minute. “Ready?” You ask. “Yeah. I'm a bit nervous though.” He confesses. “Aw, it's okay love.” You say in a soothing way, and he blushes for some reason. Making your heart flutter lightly. “It'll hurt way less than that industrial, I can tell you that.” You point at his ear as you chuckle and he shyly nods. “Okay, now sit down and show me your tongue.”

He does as you say and sits down, then you take some measures to mark his tongue before clamping it after spraying some anesthesia. “You okay?” You ask and he nods lightly. “Good.” You smile. “Now, close your eyes and take a deep breath for me.” You ask him and he does as you say while you quickly pierce his tongue. “Okay, we're almost done.” You say while placing the jewerly, then you carefully put his tongue back in his mouth while you smile. “Done~ How are you feeling?” You ask. “Good-Oh... Weird.” He says, making you chuckle as he struggles with his own tongue. “Yeah, it's better if you don't talk for a while. Also, no hot drinks, spicy food, beer... ” You tell him as you clean around. “And of course, no kissing and obviously no oral sex.” You warn him as you point at him with the marker you used for his tongue and he blushes profusely.

You bump into Renjun on your way out the shop as he just comes in. “You're leaving?” He asks looking at you and then Jisung. “Yeah, I don't have any more appointments for today, Seonhui already left and Jisung needs to go home so... Yep. Should I stay so we can talk though?” You ask and he shakes his head. “No, it's alright. Let's have a drink next time yeah? Monday after work?” He suggests and you nod. “Sure. Call me if you need me though, yeah?” You ask and he nods too. “See you later, Jisung?” He asks and Jisung shakes his head while gesturing. “What's wrong with him?” Renjun asks you and you laugh. “I pierced his tongue. He shouldn't be talking for a couple days.” You explain. “Oh, will you be okay this weekend?” He asks and Jisung nods. “Well, take some ibuprofen and call me if you feel sick. DON'T cook but also don't order anything spicy.” Renjun says and Jisung nods and gestures him to stop talking cause he's embarrassing him. You laugh softly and push Jisung so he starts walking. “See you, Renjunnie.”

It's already night time when you walk out but it's still early. “Hey, why aren't you allowed to cook?” You ask as you chuckle and he silently chuckles too, then proceeds to gesture the reason why, making you laugh in the process. “I'm gonna guess you're just a bad cook.” You say and he nods as he smiles and gives you a thumbs up. Ahhh, he's even cuter now than he normally is, ugh.

He points at you and shrugs, making you chuckle again. “Am I a good cook?” You guess his question and he happily nods. “Yeah, I'm okay.” You say and he nods one more time as you reach the bus stop. “Oh, it's coming already, lucky.” You say as you see the bus in the distance and he scrunches his nose. “What? Aren't you happy that we don't have to wait?” You ask, amused at his reaction and he shrugs, taking out his phone to write on the notes app. “I was having fun.” You read then chuckle. “Yeah? Me too. We can still chat in the bus though.” You say and he shakes his head as he sighs then motions you to jump in the bus first. You sit together next to the back doors like you normally do. “What will you do this weekend since you can't do anything fun with your mouth?” You ask and he chuckles then writes again. “That sounded weird.” You read, then laugh softly and lean over a bit to whisper. “Not weird, you just have a dirty mind.” You say and he blushes lightly. “Why do you think I was thinking about something dirty? Maybe is noona who has a dirty mind.” He writes, making you chuckle once again. “Maybe.” You tell him and he bites his lip, playing with his labret as he does so. “Can I have your number?” He writes and you raise your eyebrows at him. “Don't be dirty minded, noona~” He writes again and you chuckle softly. “Weird timing, don't you think? I have the right to be in this case.” You defend yourself and he shrugs as he mischievously smiles, showing you his phone. You scoff but look in your pocket for yours then hand it to him as you grab his phone to save your number and he does the same with his.

-----------Next day at night~

“Hey, are you really sure you can talk already?” You ask as you chuckle as soon as he answers the phone and he chuckles softly too. “Mhm, it hurts but at least it's not that swollen.” He answers, his tone a bit lower than normal since he's probably just lying down. You can slightly tell he can't move his tongue that well yet, but it's cute. “You dummy, if it hurts let's just text.” You say, kinda whining. “But... I can't look at the movie and write at the same time...” He complains and you click your tongue. “Okay.” You say, making him chuckle. “Don't be mad at me noona, I'm really not a multitasker.” You sigh at his words. “Maybe we should just watch alone...” You say and he laughs. “Ahh, whyy?” He's whining but you can tell he's smiling. “Does your tongue hurt too, noona?” He asks and you scoff. “Aish, whateverr, just play the movie.” You say as you chuckle and he chuckles too. “Mhm~ I'll start the countdown.”

~

1:30am

“Ah, seriously, the kid was too cute.” He says and you smile. “Mhm~ Ugh but I ended up crying a little.” You confess and he gasps. “No, but me too! It can't be helped with this movie, noona.” He says, making you chuckle softly. “Ah, seriously. Tears were running down my face, I didn't want to say anything though.” He confesses and you laugh. “So you're telling me that we were both suddenly so quiet while watching and neither of us noticed the other one was secretly crying?” You ask, chuckling and he chuckles too. “Yeah.”

~

3:23am

“Noona, did you fall asleep?” Jisung asks, whispering, and you whine softly. “Maybe.” You say, making him chuckle. "Was my story about what happened with that mean girl's post and my friends too much?" He asks and you scoff. “Of course not... Your voice is just too soothing Jisung-ah.” You kinda whine again “Ah, really? Is that a problem?” He asks and you giggle. “Yeah, I wanna be awake so I can keep listening to y-... Ah... I'm sleepy-drunk talking.” You say and he scoffs. “Cute.” He says in a quiet voice. “I heard that.” You point out, making him chuckle softly. “Mhm~” He says, making your heart flutter a little. You scoff as you smile then sigh and bite your lower lip before talking again. “You're cute too.”

~

3:45am

“Are you falling asleep now?” You ask chuckling softly, and he does too after a second. “Yeah...” He admits. “Well, I'll tell you about my new tattoo design some other time then.” You say and he pouts even if you can't see him. “You can tell me now, I'll stay awake.” He says and you chuckle. “It's okay, I'm sleepy too. I've had my eyes closed for a long time now.” You confess as you giggle and he does too. “Me too noona. You're a great story teller~” He says, pulling a smile out of you. “Yeah? You're falling asleep though. I must be boring.” You say and he chuckles. “Noo, I'm just tired from yesterday, noona. I promise. I love your stories, really.” He says. “I want to listen to everything you want to tell me.” He adds, and your heart flutters as you blush. “I see.” You say, chuckling at how cute he is. “Well, sleep well then and I'll tell you about it another day, yeah?” You softly say. “Mhm~ Okay, that's a promise then.. Sleep well noona.”

Chap1🐹....Chap3🐹

[neodreamzenie]

Imagine

Night Visits p.js

Genre: Fluff, Suggestive

Wc: 0.2k

Warnings: Adult(-ish) language

It was 3 am and you just woke up from hearing your phone ring. "Hello?" You say, rubbing your eyes. No Answer, so you look at the conatct name which is "..." It's your classmate, who keeps trash talking you everywhere. "Why are you calling?" You asked. "Can you... Maybe come over?" He asks with a raspy voice. "Why would I? Plus it's literally 3." You state. "Please..." "Okay" You say, quickly grabbing something wearable before heading out. You arrive at his house and ring. He opens thedoor, his eyes looking tired. You guys sit down on his couch. "I'm here. What's wrong? What happened?" "Y/n..." He moves, around, so he can face you. "What do I do?" He breathes out a bit heavily. "What do you mean?" You ask curiously. "I... I just can't stop thinking about you." You stop breathing for a second. "All the things I said about you. To you. I can't stop thinking about it. It's just... I wanted to get over my feelings. I want you to touch me, I want you to make me feel good. I wanna be the one making you feel good. I need to hear how good I can make you feel. I need to feel you. I can't help it. Help me..." You observe him before grabbing his face and smashing your lips on to his. You pull back to see his face. "You look so hot, begging for me, Park Jisung."

[jeonjungkookenthusiast1997]

Fuck why does this have to be so sad yet so beautifully written 🥹 I almost cried reading this, you can feel the pain Jisung feels as he calls out to her. Thank you for writing this beautiful work and sharing it for us all to read 💙

sacrifice ↠ han jisung

◦ genre: goryeo au, fluff, angst

◦ pairings: reader x jisung

◦ word count: 9k

◦ description: the king of goryeo issues an imperial edict for his personal physician, but the problem is, you haven’t found the secret to longevity yet.

◦ warnings: mentions of death + alcohol

◦ a/n: the gif is funky because this is a goryeo era fic (so imagine the hair) but I tried with the coloring to give it that effect // based on a few eps of ashes of love on netflix & historical accuracy—idk her

i.

Manwoldae Palace is truly extravagant in the eyes of a commoner like you, for every hall contained plated gold shrines for the gods and royal blue tainted celadon roof tiles on the ceilings. There is a stone astronomy tower in the center of the courtyard where royal astrologists analyze the stars, evaluating the alignment of the planets to assure that the timing for anything and everything was reasoned with, backed by the Heavens above.

You are dressed in your finest robes made with the softest linen and most expensive dyes, and a silk veil conceals the bottom half of your face, setting you apart from the servants and maidens tending to the flowers and the trees in the imperial garden. 

The title of “physician” lies heavy on your shoulders when you make your way to the king’s living quarters, your footsteps quick against the brick floors as the hefty medicine crate rattles with your every step. Fifteen years of studying medicine and pharmacology under the noses of your tribal elders, your efforts have not prevailed, the elixir to longevity still as arbitrary as it was centuries ago. Now, the king has finally called for you, and you have absolutely nothing to present to him.

Keep reading

[ch4nb4ng]

Over the 8 seas: Jisung

Pairing: afab!reader x jisung

Word count: 9.1k … (yeah we got off track on this one)

Warnings : dom!jisung, sub!reader, lots of mentions of breast, masturbation (m and f), titty fucking (?), intercourse, mentions of male ejaculation, praise, perv (jisung is a massive perv lmao), Inspo (warning: it’s literally porn), male aggression, mentions of intoxication and alcohol.

Note: welcome to another installment !! tagging @j-0ne25 bc they wanted to be tagged:) hope you enjoy :))))

Summary: One thing leads to another when Jisung admits to having his eyes on you when he definitely shouldn’t have.

Over the 8 seas masterlist

The salt of the air, the combination of the water and descending of the sunrise was not only the signal of the closing day, but the winding down of the summer season for another year. The peak was over, and that meant your stress levels could go back to what they were before this all started. 

Lifting a very heavy weight off of your shoulders meant there would be less things to do and people to worry about. Yes, Bondi was one of the busiest beaches, but as soon as March hit, most of the tourists were gone, and it was nothing but pretentious locals walking the dogs along the shore, or running along the beach line at 6:30am before the typical 9-5 office job. It’s not like you were judging all 9-5 goers, just specifically the joggers, because you couldn't remember the last time you had a decent interaction with one of them.

The back of your hand came to your forehead, swiping the precipitated skin as you took what felt like a seat in a long time. A sigh of relief came from your lips, exasperated from the variety of missing children, adults illegally bringing and littering alcohol bottles on public property, oh boy, the people who did not swim between the flags. It was a long day, meaning that you were looking forward to just slumping down on the couch and watching another episode of whatever HBO series you were watching with a heavy pour of red wine.

“What a fucking day,” Jisung sighed, scaring the complete shit out of you.

“Jesus Jisung,” you cried, almost falling out of your seat. Your reaction made him chuckle, throwing his hands in the air like a weapon had been pointed directly at him.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

Jisung was one of your oldest friends at the beach. He is one of the only people that have worked at the beach for as long as you have. Always keen, eager, motivated. Helping others was the joy he got from life. Jisung possessed many qualities that you wish you possessed. Patience, warm heartedness. It was easy to fall for Jisung, and you have a couple of times. It was just too bad that your job got in the way and the minute detail of Jisung having a girlfriend most of the time. You thought that maybe this was it for you. Time to give up.

“It’s okay Sungie,” you giggled, hitting his shoulder in a playful manner, “today was crazy, wasn’t it?”

“That’s an understatement,” he scoffed, turning away and opening the communal fridge, grabbing out a sandwich. He turned back around, sitting next to you. Your gaze became one of disappointment.

“Don’t tell me that’s your lunch?”

He shrugged in response, “It’s okay. Like you said, today was busy right?”

A hint of anger simmered in your heart. It was admirable yet frustrating that this was kind of the person he was. So selfless that he never put himself first. Taking care of himself last. This was something that he was adamant about. Something he always did from the day you met him.  

“Still,” you playfully smacked him again, “you have to take care of yourself first before anyone else.”

He took another bite of his food, resting the calloused palm that was his right hand on your right knee. He gave you a look. One that mixed gratitude, but there was something else, something that you couldn’t quite put your finger on. His lips almost trembled, like he was hesitant, nervous to say something. 

“Y/n, you don’t have to worry about me,” he whispered, like for some reason he was worried that someone would hear, like a big secret, “I know you do and I appreciate it, but I’m okay.”

Jisung’s body language was the catalyst for the tension in the room suddenly changing. He leaned closer, the hair on your skin rising with each movement. His gaze was to the floor, but yours was stuck on him. Was this finally the moment that you had been secretly hoping for? The gentle kiss of the perfect man that has been by your side the whole time? Your heart was practically beating out of your chest, really not sure what you were supposed to be anticipating. Jisung was a man that held his cards close to his chest.

“Y/n, I-”

You blinked a couple times, making sure that you were not dreaming and that it truly was a real moment.

“Yeah?” your stare practically glued to him, his features, any indication that he was giving to help you understand  any cognitions he was having. But he was like an actor: able to hide and convey his emotions when appropriate. There was not one flaw to this man, and it was slowly killing you on the inside how long this was taking, even this event was anything.

“I-”

“Summer is fucking over let’s go!”

For fucks sake. You almost fell out of your chair once more, having the second fright of your life when you heard the loudmouth that was Changbin walk into the tearoom with just way too much energy for someone who was at the end of their shift. He froze in his step, already seeing too much between you and Jisung.

“You guys okay?”

“What? Oh yeah,” you huffed, hitting the air with your palm, “just tired from a long day, right Jisung?”

Your eyes widened at him, sincerely hoping he would not blow your cover of whatever it was that just happened. 

“Yeah, super tired, only eating my lunch now.”

The smile on your face faded gently as you got up, placing your coffee cup in the sink. “Fuck,” you whispered, dropping your phone on the floor. Jisung, of course being the gentleman he was, noticed and dropped the floor with you in an attempt to pick it up for you. What you didn’t expect to see was where his eyes landed. It was only for a split second, but it was enough to make the heat in your cheeks rise. You were right, this particular lifeguard shirt was that little too big for you, however, what you didn't expect was Jisung, the man that could be by defined chivalry and dismantled the patriarchy taking advantage of said gap, with his eyes. They were wide too, like it was a kid finding their favorite flavored lollipop in a candy store. It really was enough for you to squeeze the fabric together as the two of your rose. It wasn’t that you were uncomfortable, if anything it was the opposite. It was more just to save face as Changbin was still lingering around with his very unwanted presence that the current moment. He still, between the ogling, managed to pick up your phone.

“Here,” he mumbled, now unable to look at you completely.

“Thanks,” you smiled, a silence filling the room as the two of you stared, unsure whether to mention the tension in the air coming to an all time peak. Did he know that he had been caught? Were you perceiving this completely wrong? It was one thing to accuse the guy of staring at your tits, it was another to embarrass him in front of his other colleague and superior when it may not have even been true. An objective perspective, however, could see that there was so much more, the layers of chemistry was an overwhelming revelation.

“What the fuck is up with you guys?”

Heads snapped simultaneously, a look of disdain causing your cheeks to turn upwards and the lack of manners Changbin, with his legs spread wide, chewing and talking, yelling, interfering with his mouth open. Crunchy flakes crusting on the sound of his mouth. 

“Jesus christ, Changbin,” your mouth was upturned in the most disgust, “ever heard of talking after swallowing your food?”

“Yeah dude” Jisung scoffed, “I love you and all, but you really have to learn how to act like you're not a neanderthal sometimes.”

The adult child scoffed, a large chunk of corn flake coming out.

“You guys stop deflecting, and just fuck.”

An audible gasp was heard from the bellows of your throat.

“Changbin,” Jisung growled, chest beginning to puff, “what the fuck-”

“It’s fine,” you interrupted, placing a hand on his chest to deflate him a little, “Changbin, that is so inappropriate. I understand this is a friendly environment and we are friends, but I will not be disrespected in the workplace like this. Don’t make this hostile, otherwise I will report you, do you understand?”

The young man nodded, small, suddenly closing his legs and off from the two of you, eating the rest of his food in peace. Wanting to evade the awkwardness, you nudged Jisung, signaling him to leave with you. He was flabbergasted, not used to seeing you talk like this. Maybe it was an overreaction from you. Maybe because part of you wished it was true. It was still unprofessional to say, especially in front of others.

Walking into the locker/shower room was fine, needing to grab yourself. So did Jisung too. Another silence fell over as the two of you packed your things for the day.

“Do you think I was too harsh?” you questioned, closing your locker door behind you.

“Not at all,” Jisung reassured you, following your actions with the locker door, “it’s super inappropriate to talk like that at work?”

“Right? And where would he even get that from?”

A forced laugh came from your lips. Definitely not from the way you were exchanging lingering looks for an abnormally long time. Not him staring at the gap in your shirt. There was definitely no reason for Changbin to come to such a conclusion.

“Yeah,” Jisung scoffed, way too loud to be convincing, “that’s crazy talk.”

“Definitely. Anyways, I’m going to have a shower and then go. Did you need anything from me?”

“Uh,” scratching the back of his head, he became stuck in thought, “not that I can think of.”

“Okay,” you smiled, heading into the stall, “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

He nodded, about to turn and leave, but it was when you forgot to completely close the stall, and he detected out of the peripheral vision of his right eye that your hands were above your head, initiating the process of discarding your clothes. Was this a test for him? He wasn’t sure. But he was willing to take the bait. Creeping to the side of the stall, Jisung had a perfect view of you, your bikini top resting atop your chest. He had never been so jealous of a piece of clothing in his life. He had to stop his breathing when it was then discarded next, the image of your breasts, almost like relieving themselves from a hard day of work,  they escaped the suffocating clothing, well in his mind they were suffocating.  He really had never been so attracted to someone in his life. Jisung could feel the tent in his pants approaching as soon as the water was turned on and you were standing under it. A simple hum escaped your lips as you allowed the cascading stream of steamy water to enclose your body, tiny droplets pitter pattering across your chest, the intensity of the water making your nipples hard; Jisung was in heaven.

The only part of you that he was focused on was your chest. Jisung did not even take a second to notice your glistening arms, legs or waist. He was so fixated that he truly forgot where he was. It baffled him that you failed to notice his presence there, hard, longing for you in an amount he never had before.

The water felt nice. It was able to help you relax from the intense situation you had found yourself in. Almost a little too much. Your mind couldn’t help but wander, traveling to the multitudes of scenarios that popped up from the various half and hour of being that close to Jisung. It was easy to take those times further, the storytelling part of your brain was exquisite. It’s what helped come to the visually pleasing image as you closed your eyes, hands roaming across your hips, stomach, waist, chest. Exactly where he was looking. You knew better than to do what you were about to do at this very moment; but you couldn't help it. Forgetting where you were was way too easy as your fingers attached themselves to the sensitive nubs, gently pinching and squeezing in such a comfortable way. A gentle groan came from your lips as one hand flicked, the other massaged the corresponding breast, now a multitude of soft whimpers and moans spilling from your throat, quiet in a poor attempt of making sure no one heard. But you didn't know any better. This was almost an everyday ritual, whether at home or here, it did not matter. When you have privacy (or so you thought) it was a moment alone when you were at peace with yourself. Your mind, however, is always racing, consuming thoughts of him. Jisung was the perfect man in your eyes. So care free and fun, while simultaneously respectful. It was almost impossible that such a man existed.

Or so you thought, because when the moment he saw you reach for what he considered to be those beautifully shaped nipples, his jaw was on the floor, slack in complete disbelief at the idea of you just touching yourself like that, in public, door open, anyone able to walk in at any moment. Maybe that’s the hottest thing he found about this. That you were so confident yet concurrently careless. Fuck, were you doing this on purpose?

It didn’t matter, because even when your fingers disappeared from your chest down to your core, the damp tingling in between your legs, he paid no mind, truly fascinated at how they got harder with each passing second. Jisung was careless about his own hardening body parts, truly in a trance of how beautiful he perceived your actions to be. He didn’t even think about it in a way that was nasty, hot, sexy, even though it was. He was in a truly mesmerized state, one that he could stay in forever. Even when you were leaning against the wall of the stall, hips caressing your fingers, getting closer and closer to the edge. It wasn’t until he heard footsteps vaguely close to the locker room that he shit himself, a quick step into the empty stall next to him until it was gone. It was only then he realized the ramifications of his actions. An immense level of guilt washed over his body at the epiphany. What made it worse was that he was still completely erect, cock far from cooling off even though the hurts that swiped across his mind were telling him how disgusting he was. He felt betrayed by his brain, like he was a massive hypocrite. If he was being honest, any chance he got he took the chance to stare at your chest. A split second when you’re talking to him. When you can see him, when you think he can’t. Jisung was a dirty boy with a pervasive mind. He even remembered the first time he did it.

You were standing there, back to Jisung, innocently taking your top off and turning around to him, bikini only as you were having a serious conversation about supplies or funding or some fucking irrelevant shit about the beach; his actual fucking job. 

Like yourself, he prided himself on being respectful, a gentle gentleman. Chivalrous, everything you described him to be, he was; on the outside; but Jisung truly, was a dirty boy with a pervasive mind.

Panic began to flood his limbs as he tiptoed as fast as he could, grabbing his stuff and heading for the door. He was whipped lashed, however, by Felix, the younger amateur lifeguard that he very much forgot he promised to give a ride home. He was way too distracted by a pair of boobs, but he was also very much in denial about it.

“Jisung?”

He said nothing, instead turning to the boy who had a confused look on his face.

“I’ve been waiting for half an hour for you. Didn’t you finish at 6?”

Fuck, 30 mins he spent staring at your fucking chest. To jisung however it still wasn’t enough.

“What? Oh, yeah I had to help Y/n with putting some equipment away, sorry dude I should have texted you.”

“Oh that’s cool,” Fliex shrugged, really unsure how to interpret Jisung’s face. It truly was like he had just seen a ghost.

What it really was, however, was the lingering guilt, disgust, repulsion he felt for himself in the moment. Even the drive home was quiet, unable to even comprehend the music playing. Jisung was really just going through the motions as he dropped Felix off, parked his car, walked into his apartment and threw his shit on the ground, falling in the shape of a snow angel on his bed.

He pondered as he stared at the ceiling, robot-like actions coming to a halt, the familiar feelings of disgust and guilt coming back. The way he opened your instagram late at night and jerked off to almost all of your pictures. You were his best friend, he really shouldn’t think of you like that.

You, on the other hand, were no better. The similar, perverted thoughts consumed your mind as well. You just fucking masturbated at your place of work, to your coworker, in a public space that anyone could have seen. Your extremely sexy and attractive coworker, but that didn’t make it better. 

A shower at home, again, was enough for the moment to rid yourself, quite literally wash yourself off your sin. Forget the mind boggling orgasm that was provoked by the thought of Jisung being close to you. It was back to grandma mode for you, glasses on, side lamp on and reading a book to help you fall asleep. Your mind was back at peace, partly wanting to forget today. It was always a lingering thought in your mind.

Your lids were shutting, on the verge of falling into a deep sleep, that was, until your phone buzzed, almost falling off your side table as you opened one eye, groaning in annoyance that you had to check it. Huh? J-han00 liked your post? You didn’t post a pic. Your curiosity got the better of you, clicking on the notification. But as soon as you did, opening instagram, it was gone. What an idiot you thought. Stalking you. The smile on your face, on the contrary, told another story. It didn’t matter, because it was time to sleep, and you did like a baby.

It was when you got to work, the calmness and lack of regret switched into full blown anxiousness and real regret, because your heart sank to your ass when you saw him. But you couldn't forget that you were a leader. You were the managing lifeguard of the fucking Bondi beach. You knew better than to let this little crush overtake your very serious work. A born leader does not walk away when the going gets tough.

Today, thank god, was an admin day for you. No active duty. This meant you got to sit at your desk, closed off from the others. A sigh of relief came from your lips from the fact that any necessary interactions with Jisung had not occurred. Your bag was on the floor, you sitting in your chair as you opened your laptop, connecting it with your desktop. It was somewhat annoying how long it took this ancient system to reboot. If anything you could fall asleep at the turtle pace. What did keep you awake, however, was the triple knock that came from the opposite of your door.

“Come in.”

Failing to turn around was a mistake, the familiar voice of your friend on the receiving end of your cold gesture.

“Hey Y/N,” Jisung mumbled, resulting in you turning around to face him. Fuck. He actually did his hair today. The gel pricked strands pushed up, exposing the bare skin that covered his forehead. Clothes looked together, a tank with the sleeves cut off. His shoulders had not been exposed like that for a while. Suddenly you were feeling hot, hastily grabbing the water in your bag,  sculling generously before actually acknowledging his presence with words.

“Jisung? Hey, how are you this morning?”

The sudden memory of your, well, activities last night flooded into your mind like an emergency tsunami; currently consuming all of your thoughts. You were unable to look at him straight. Was it him or was it you? Did he actually put in an effort, or did the lenses of your vision and how you perceive Jisung suddenly change? 

“I’m good. Uhm,” his voice was quiet, swaying his foot from side to side as he looked at the ground in front of him and not at you, “I just wanted to clear up something with you.”

Oh shit. This could literally be anything. But he did not look like his usual self. Jisung was far from the nervous type.

“What did you want to talk about?”

“Oh uhm, just the like on your profile by accident. It wasn’t me. I was with some mates and I-”

“Oh,” you replied, tone oblivious, “you liked my photo? I didn’t see.”

“Oh,” his eyes widened, face turning red at his unnecessary admission, “yeah, I, nevermind.”

“Is that all today?”

Your smile was kind, wanting to make him feel comfortable. The tension between the two of you since yesterday was tense, wound up if you will. It still, however, did not need to get in between your work. 

“I wish, “ he chuckled, posture now upright and returning back to the man you know, “there’s a couple of drunk people on the beach. We want to kick them off but they won't leave unless they talk to a supervisor.” 

An excessive eye roll took over your vision. Drunk people on the beach were the worst. Just always taking it too far and a complete hassle to get rid off. He felt bad coming to you also, knowing that this was your least favorite thing to deal with.

“ For fucks sake,” you scoffed, getting up from your seat, “Australian’s are just bunch of fucking alcoholics.”

Without thought, you grabbed the yellow shirt out of your bag, practically ripping off your current attire, completely. You were too consumed by rage to realize that you were now bra and bikeshorts only. Jisung quickly turned the other way, even though he really did not want to.

“Right,” he mumbled, not wanting to interrupt your vigorous rant, “yeah, crazy stuff.”

“Like it’s midday and they’re already smashed? Go to your fucking 9-5.”

The current oblivion was a disaster for you, because once again, you failed to realize that Jisung was still in the room with you, and now creeping those perverted eyes back to your body. A frustrated hand ran through your own hair, pacing back and forth as words continued to be spewed a consistent string of curse words. He knew it really shouldn’t have turned him on, but it did. Mainly because half your tits were out and you were cursing back and forth, easy to fuel his desires of what you would sound like under him, on top of him. It didn’t matter, it was not what was important right now.

It felt like years of waiting for you to dress yourself, grab a walkie talkie and head out to the beach to confront these losers. Ah of course, there they were. Two quite large, muscular men laughing their heads off, sitting right next to the water: idiots. It was easily audible how drunk they were by the mass slurring of words when trying to converse.It wasn’t a difficult task to kick intoxicated people off of the beach, but you were reducing someone from being unable to swim any day of the week. Jisung followed you in pursuit, not wanting to take over his supervisor. You approached slowly, unsure how they were going to react to the news of being kicked off.

“Good afternoon gentleman, how are we doing today?”

The two said nothing, instead bursting with laughter at the sight of you.

“What seems to be the entertainment here guys?”

They smiled again, looking at each other before the one closest to the shore line spoke.

“You’re the supervisor are ya?”

“Yes I am.”

The two laughed, again. Great. Two misogynistic, drunk pricks. Today was supposed to be the first day of relaxation, not even on active duty. But of course there had to be people that always made your job that more difficult. Jisung went to step forward, but you placed your hand on his chest, motioning that you’ve got this in the bag.

“Is there an issue with that?”

“We w-want to speak t-to a r-real s-”

“Well I’m all there is. My colleague has asked you nicely to please leave the beach as you are currently committing a crime or we will call the police and have you forcibly removed.”

It was the first time they had paid attention to you, the look of humor on their faces quickly dissipating, turning into anger. Their eyebrows were furrowed as they attempted to stand, swaying quite a bit before stepping closer, a poor strive at intimidation as they puffed their chests in an overbearing compensation of masculinity. Yes, they were much taller, and bigger, but they were certainly no match for you.

“You heard her,” Jisung grumbled, fitting in between the small gap between you and this hideous man, “leave or we will kick you off.”

“Wow you think you’re a tough guy huh,” he chuckled, now pressing his chest up against your fellow colleague. The last you wanted is for him to get into a fist fight with two very intoxicated individuals. You nudged him to the side once again, wanting to relieve some of the tension that was unfolding at this moment. You couldn’t help but let the small part of your mind admire the way he stood up for you. Like he would take a bullet for you in a heartbeat. Jisung really was the most urbane human you had the pleasure of meeting, so you would die if anything happened to him because of you.

“Let’s not be brash so we can all come to a single understanding.”

“Fuck that,” he scoffed, “we aren’t d-doing anything ill-iilegal.”

“Listen here buddy,” you growled, patience beginning to wear thin, “you are breaking the law by bringing a substance prohibited on the beach, as well as public intoxication, though I’m sure you’re not too capable of understanding a word I just said, did you?”

They said nothing, instead the quiet one pushing you into the water, head hitting the crushed up shells digging into the back of your head. The shore line washed over your face, eyes crippling with what felt like fire as the salt water took over your eyesight. Mumbled voices could be heard from the water. Tears threaten to spill from your eyes at the embarrassment and humiliation you felt at this current moment. The only thing you could concentrate on was the limbs, hands, fingers reaching out to lift you up, opening your eyes, you took the invitation, standing up next to them. Pulling out the walkie talkie, you pressed the button, speaking into it,

“Did you get that over?”

“Yup,” Hyunjin replied to the speaker, “the police have just arrived and are walking over to the two of you. Can you see them, over?”

“We can, thanks Hyunjin, over.” Luckily there were always people watching from the tower.

Jisung’s first concern was you, the police already over and standing in front of the two humans that you could barely call men. Jisung, seeing as you were a little bit out of it, eyes red from the acidity of the water, explained what happened. A police report would need to be filled out, but that was something that could be done later. Now wanting to interact or provoke them again, you fled the scene quickly, running back to your office and slamming the door behind you. Do not disturb the sign on the door. That sign was only used for when you were on conference calls or competing for confidential information about beach goers or staff. Today, however, was a cop out excuse to use it. 

A couple of tears choked you as you checked the back of your head in the mirror, making sure there were no lumps and cuts from the rough beach surface. It was one thing to be disrespected, it was another to be looked down on for who you are. It was always disheartening, and you don’t know if being a woman in a male dominated industry would ever get easier. 

A knock interrupted your feel sorry for yourself session, but you ignored it, not wanting to face any of your staff that all saw you fall flat on your ass. Your staff would never make fun of you for such a thing, but it did bruise your ego a little bit. The knock came again, followed by you continuing to ignore. It wasn’t until the knock was persistent, a small voice coming from the other side. 

You were thankful, however, that out of all the people that could be at your office door, it was Jisung. He stormed in, closing the door behind him. 

“Jisung I’m really busy I-”

“Shush,” he hissed, turning your chair in front of him, grabbing your arm, and sitting you down. He dropped to his knees, spreading your legs apart so he could scooch in between. A small torch appeared in the palm of his hands, the switch flicked and swiftly brought to your eyesight. Of course. A concussion test. Maybe it was just an excuse to be close to you. It didn’t matter, because Jisung’s closeness was something that you always craved, in any form.

“Jisung I don’t have concussion,” you sighed, “I’m not in the mood for fun antics.”

“I know but it sounded pretty hard when you fell. Look to the left, I wanted to make sure you were fine.”

It was unfair to be harsh to Jisung, especially when he was being caring and kind. He really didn’t need to do any of this. 

“I’m fine, just a little embarrassed,” you mumbled, causing Jisung to grab your chin with his thumb and index finger.

“You don’t have anything to be embarrassed about.”

His face was close, eyes boring into you while he attempted to console you. The feeling of the room was the same as the one yesterday, when your phone fell to the floor. It had to be an invitation. It had to be a sign.

“I don’t?”

Your voice was soft, fear that it would crack and ruin what was becoming an intimate moment.

“Never. Those guys are the ones that should be embarrassed. You’re a great lifeguard. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.”

It was this moment, the brief seconds of silence in between Jisun’s last words, and the way he was looking at you, that you lunged forwards, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing your lips to his. The kiss was short, because you pulled away, coming to the realization that this was crazy. Your jaw dropped, arms withdrawing from and and the left hand covering your mouth.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry I-”

Jisung took the hand from your mouth that was covering your mumble. His smile was big, giddy almost, as he took you in again, this time his hands cupping each side of your face as he returned the first unrequited kiss, much more vigor applied to your lips. Eyes fluttering shut, Jisung glided his lips together with yours, things heating up at a rapid rate as his tongue begged for entrance. You complied, a soft groan releasing from your throat at how good his tongue felt. The sudden sensation of touch was  imminent to you. His hands on your face, the texture of them felt so strong, and what you could equate to this longing of closeness that you always desired towards him. Your arms came to his chest, scrunching the material and you brought his body closer, any part of him that you wanted you could get.

“Wait,” he mumbled, pulling away in a sudden movement of desperation, “I can’t do this.”

Your heart sank, face heated at the new level of humiliation you didn’t know was even possible. Was he really about to shatter your heart into a million pieces? Even if he did, you knew that you wouldn’t be that sad, purely because he would do it in a way that was so polite and gentle. Unlike you.

“Can’t do what?”

The guilt was eating him up alive. He knew he had to confess to his sinful desires before doing anything. It felt unfair any other way. He took a step back, standing up with his hands behind his back.

“I have to be honest with you.”

“Okay?”

“I, yesterday, after the locker room, when I ‘went home,’ I didn’t go home.”

Your wrinkles in your forehead became apparent at the confusion in what he was about to say.

“Okay?”

“Fuck, I noticed that you left the shower door open and well, fuck how do I even say this?”

“Just spit it out,” you mumbled. The anticipation was killing you inside.

“I was watching you.”

At first, a swipe of anger coursing through your veins. Why the fuck would Jisung, the well known individual for gentleman like behaviours would watch you shower. You stood up,chest on your hand as you subtly walked closer to him. His eyes went straight to the digits that lay along there. He couldn’t believe he was still doing this. Confessing to you his dirty secret while also still partaking in it at the same time.

“You were watching me shower?”

Fuck he couldn’t even look you in the eye now. Full shame taking over his body, every fiber of him. This was the most humiliating moment of his life.  You weren’t far behind however, because when your mind traveled back to last night’s shower, you weren’t exactly using it for showering purposes either. Oh my god. You had to find out what it was he actually saw.

“Yes. I watched you shower. I saw you, taking your shirt off, bikini, panties, all of it. The way the shower water trickled down your body, over those beautiful tits. I saw everything.”

The vulgarity of his words took you by surprise. It was never the way you had heard your friend speak. Part of you is surprised that he would take it that far; but part of you is not. There were multiple times that you had caught him staring at your chest. You were still speechless however, unsure if you should still ask, did he see everything? You could tell Jisung was getting nervous too, seeing as you had no reaction or slight verbal communication. Honestly, he was dying on the inside, and if you didn’t speak now, he might explode.

“Are you mad?”

His voice came out small, but honestly, you didn’t know if you were or not. Your gaze left his eyes for a moment, consumingly drifting down to his shorts. Surely he wasn’t hard from this conversation? Oh my god he was fucking hard. The tent in his pants was impossible to miss. You took a step closer, Jisung biting down on his bottom lips, eyes not moving a millimeter as he watched you come closer and closer.

“Y/n, please,” he whined, desperate to know your inner thoughts, “are you mad? I’m really sorry, if you want to fire me-”

“Fire you?”

He hated that he found your tone of voice so seductive right now. It just made his eyes want to flutter shut, listen to your voice like an ASMR video that he found deeply pleasurable. He knew that you noticed his cock tenting in his pants, but he didn’t care. It was already out in the open that he was perv, hiding it would just be a waste of energy. The more you looked at him, the quicker the anger or any negative emotion of that matter faded. It made you curious. Almost like testing the waters. Using some force, you took a wrist from behind his back, opening up the closed fist and hovering it over your pussy. His jaw was agape, but you could tell that’s not where he wanted to touch you most.

“I don’t want to fire you, and no I’m not mad, if anything, I’m kind of flattered.”

Once you placed his own hand over your shirt, it was game over. Jisung’s lips smashed against yours, tongue begging for access as soon as the two of you collided. Hand that was free digging into your hips on one side, hands already placed staying where it was as he walked you back, the curve of your ass soft hitting the front of your desk. Jisung’s hard on was rubbing against the side of your leg. Sitting atop of the desk and spreading your legs, you invited him to come in closer, now able to feel it against your rutting crotch. The ache was already far from dull, but it didn't matter. You wanted this to last as long as possible. The do not disturb sign was up, and the walls were mostly soundproof, so it really could be dragged out as long as you wanted, no softness needed.

“Mhmm,” he hummed, breaking away to breathe for a split moment, “your lips are so soft.” 

He continued to break away, spreading a multitude of kisses across your cheek, down your jawline, to your  ear lobe. The Jisung you knew before was already gone, and you could see from the darkness in his eyes that this was who he really was.

“Jisung,” you gasped in between, his teeth gently nibbling on the peachy skiing texture, “what happened? I thought you were such a gentleman?”

“That’s just a facade,” he whispers, licking a thick stripe of the side of your neck, “I’m anything but a gentleman, and now I'm going to show you me, the real me.”

His teeth dove into the easily accessible skin that met your neck and collarbone. A deep groan, one of shock , bellowed your throat, Jisung sucking in the most sensitive skin you had. He kept his hand firmly on your left tit, kneading and massaging it as much as he could without losing control of himself. If he had a dollar for everytime he thought about wanting to do this, he would never have to work again. It was something that constantly consumed his cognitions. Even his subconscious if he knew what was in there. Jisung was a filthy animal that had nothing but brain rot for you and your tits. He wasn't endeavoring it, like you had planned to yourself, but the impatience was growing. You swatted his hand away, lifting your arms and giving him the single to take it off. The noise was loud when it hit the concrete floor, still wet from the tow douchebags. But Jisung didn’t care. All he could focus on was that fact that this was the first time you were voluntarily exposing yourself to him. The guilt he once had was gone, and the fact that he was in a way being rewarded is what baffled his mind. His face let your shoulder, giving you a look.

“Wait, can you, do you have, it’s probably too much to ask.”

Your chest was heaving up and down, very fast, symbolic of the past couple of minutes before you could answer.

“Is this something you think about when you think of me?”

“Honestly, yeah. It’s your bikini top.”

“Oh,” you smirked, reaching underneath your desk and grabbing the desired item out of your bag, “you mean this?”

Jisung’s eyes lie up like a christmas tree as you gently unclasped your bra, watching the way it elegantly fell across your waist and to the floor. Jisung was much more fixated on covering yourself back up with the flimsy piece of fabric rather than your actual naked upper body itself. Once the material covered the front, you turned around, pointing to the strings from behind.

“Could you help me tie them up?”

Your voice was low, seductive, putting the man beside you in a trance, hands sliding up the sides of your body until they reached your upper back. His fingers were delicate, the feeling of his calloused palms removed as he tied the strings to each other, perfect bows in length and strength. Once he spun you back around, he pressed another sensual kiss to your lips, this time completely intending to completely devour you and your lips. It was working, because the longer his lips were lingeried, the stronger the throb between at your core. Jisung was already attractive enough as it was, but it hit you again like a ton of bricks. The way his lips, hands, body, his whole being worshiping the ground you walked on. The sweet mixture of his care and attention mixed with the saltiness of his perverted desires was making your mind spin, and he really hadn’t even done anything yet.

He pulled away, another smoke coating his lips as he looked at you with heavy lust.

“I was going to make you get on your knees, but you can sit on your chair if you like, wouldn't want those pretty knees to get bruised do we?”

“Use me however you want Jisung.”

You wanted to comply, partly because Jisung’s lust driven haze was controlling your mind, but also because it was nice to have someone take control for once. The last thing you wanted to do after a day of work was take care of more people. It was honestly a fantasy of being marched around, told what to do, and Jisung was about to fulfill this perfectly. 

It was his turn to undress himself, taking no time to undo the drawstring on his yellow shorts, swiftly removing boxers in one motion as he stood closer. The way his cock sprung free, like it was beginning to release almost made you drool. You opened your mouth automatically, assuming that you were going to have the delight of tasting him, but he had other plans. Jisung gave himself a few strokes of relief before lining himself up with your chest; ah, now you understand. Lifting your hands from your side, you pushed your tits together, the contact of his tip with your chest making you gasp. His cock slid very easily in the space created by your hands, Jisung’s head rolling back automatically once he moved back and forth. This would not have been something you thought about doing, but you’re glad that Jisung has these dirty ideas of his own, because you were moving every second. Taking one hand away from your chest you placed it at the base of his cock, making sure that all of his cock was receiving the love that was the sensation of your body, your touch.

“Oh my god,” Jisung growled, voice deep in thought, “I can’t believe how good this feels.”

“I’m glad,” you giggled, enjoying with much innocence this was affecting Jisung, “I bet you’ve thought about this many times.”

Your whole body was moving with each thrust, Jisung’s movements increasing with stamina the more he lost himself in the pleasurable feeling. 

“Wait,” you questioned, making him come to a halt. You pumped his cock, not wanting him to lose any sensation as you used your other hand to pull down your top, now completely exposing yourself to him. His head snapped and his eyes looked like they were almost about to cry at the sight. His hands went for the automatic grab, palms grazing the hardness of your nipples as he pushed them together himself, cock running back and forth the cleavage.

“Hmm, your hands,” you moaned, chair beginning to creak at how hard he was pumping his cock, “feel really good.”

“Shit,” he hissed, “I’m gonna cum if I don’t stop.”

But there was a cognitive dissonance with his words and his actions, because he didn’t stop. The position was somewhat awkward,but you didn't care, completely infatuated and aroused by how fixated Jisung was on your tits, and using your body to get himself off.

“You okay baby,” Jisung groaned, “am I hurting you?”

“No baby,” you cooed, a soft moan and the flicking of your left nipple, “feels really good.”

“I want you to feel really good though baby,” he leaned down, pressing another sensuous kiss to your lips, “want to make sure you know you’re all mine.”

Mine, the word made your heart flutter.

“Well,” you hummed, keeping a hand on the base of his cock as you stood up and out of your chair, “you have your fantasies, I have my own.”

Jisung was taken aback by your statement. He thought he was the only one that was dirty minded, clouded by lustful and devil crazed things he wanted to do to you.

“You do?”

“Of course,” you huffed, letting go of him and pushing by the chest back into your seat. He couldn’t help himself, gently gratifying himself with his hands as he observed you taking off your shorts, now damp panties following, leaving you completely nude. Jisung took his bottom lip between his teeth, noticing how sticky the insides of your thighs were.

“When I was showering, last night, you know when you were watching me?”

You smirked, so easily resulting in him being embarrassed once again.

“Ha ha,” he mocked, still stroking himself. He was shameless at this point.

“I was thinking about you, you know.”

“You were?”

“Mhm,” you mumbled, taking a straddle seat on his lap, “exactly like you are now.”

His length pressing against the outside of your folds  a small moan leaked. This stickiness that was your arousal coating his shaft as you tenderly initiated the grind, pussy folds opening up and messing up his cock. The anticipation was killing you, as it was him, however, at the same time, it felt too good to stop, and you knew it wasn’t enough to make either of you cum in the moment.

“Yeah baby,” you whispered, a euphonious sound escaping your lips in between your words, “you’re not the only one that has a perverted mind.” 

And when Jisung smiled at your words, you knew that he was your person. He was you in the male form. It was disgustingly sexy how much of him being a sexual pervert for you turned you on, and you should feel ashamed, guilty for it. But the equally morally corrupt part of you loved it, thrived on it. You were so fucking dirty, and so was he, and it was something that you really fucking loved about him.

“Fuck, you’re so mine,” he chuckled, a deep growl to his voice as his hands stayed on your tits in any way shape and form. He went back to kneading, then using his mouth to suck on them, hard, pinching, flicking with his fingers. He was obsessed, and now he was worried that he needed to be touching them all the time; he was selfish and couldn’t help it. The use of mine, again, made your hips jump, the tip of his cock nudging at your clit, which singalled the moment that the tease, prolonged fest was over.

“Can I sit on your cock?”

He didn’t even take the time to reply, taking his hands off your tits for a split second, a hand guiding you to the tip of his cock, the other wanting a simple taste of you, dipping his index and middle finger taking an intense swipe from your hole, through your folds, and up to his tongue. Your breath became heavy at the extremely attractive behavior jisung was displaying. It helped speed up the process, hand on his base and you leisurely slid down his length, allowing yourself time to adjust to his girth. A simultaneous sigh of relief escaped both of your chests as he filled you up all the way, bottoming you out, before you rose again, yourself completely in charge of the pace. The start was slow, giving you the perfect amount of time in between thrusts to feel him buried deep inside your pussy.

“God you’re so wet,” Jisung scoffed, the sounds of squelching and skin slapping filling the room, “so tight too.”

Your hands were now wrapped around his neck once again, his hands on your tits as he did not massage them, letting them spring free and very, very thoroughly enjoying the bounce they showed as you rode him.

“Hmmmm,” you whined, unable to form a coherent sentence, “so good.”

“You like my cock baby?”

“Yes.” The mumble was low enough, but Jisung wanted to hear you. Wanted to hear how well his cock was making your crumble. How well he was filling your lustful desires. He needed the validation of knowing that he was doing a good job. It’s something he looked for when he did his job patrolling the beach. Even though he was just as experienced as you were. He valued you and your opinion that much, so this was very important to you.

“You’re doing such a good job riding me cock like that baby,” he chuckled, hand snaking up your back and around your neck as he brought you close for another deep, longing kiss. God, he just couldn’t get enough of you, and the feeling was mutual.

“I fucking love you cock Jisung,” you grunted, pulling away from his swollen lips, beginning to find it difficult to keep a consistent rhythm. He moaned at the way you said his name, beads of sweat forming on his forehead the longer the two of you sat there, inside of each other. Your head was on the verge of rolling back, the slight assistance of Jisung spanking your tit and completing the full action of your neck practically snapping back. Eyes screwed shut, solely concentrating on the small moans and string of cuss words escaping his lips as you brought your pace to a very slow rate, hips now in more of a rolling motion rather than straight up and down.

“Jesus fucking christ,” he spat, juices covering your tits now, the sight ver visually pleasing to him, “I die when you say my name like that.”

“Jisung,” you whined, “Jisung, baby, I want you.”

“You want me to fuck you princess?”

“Yes,” you huffed, almost out of breath.

“Tell me baby,” he cooed, pressing another soft kiss to your lips, “say it.”

“Fuck, please,” you begged, legs emerging into shaking as you became desperate for him, “please fuck me.”

“Hmm, okay, such a good girl for asking.”

Jisung’s hands reluctantly withdrew from your chest one last time, the pressure mounding on your hips as you forced you to a halt. Palms now moving to your hands, he stood up, legs wrapping around him without a thought to remain close to him. Another make out session has begun, and jisung had the smooth effort of walking you around, pinning you up against the wall. He kept you there, legs still wrapped around his torso as he began to move, however, an unforgiving pace was being set. It forces you to pull away, a face of shock yet desperation plastered across your facial features. This was impossible to last to, but maybe that was the point. Jisung was definitely sick of your antics at this point. Your chest eye level with his face as he leaned forward, moaning at the way your tits fell on his face with each thrust.

“I’m sorry,” he groaned, “I can’t handle it anymore.”

“Fuck I’m, I-” your voice cm out weak, slightly cracking at the last word, “I can’t hold it much longer.”

“That’s okay baby,” he puffed, practically out of breath at how hard he was working to please you, “just tell me when you’re cumming okay?”

You nodded, pussy beginning to unconsciously clench around his length. A high pitched moan escaped your lips as you felt the pit of your stomach reaching what you knew to be your peak. Jisung’s was becoming sloppy himself, not sure how much he can last, but the last place he wanted to finish, respectfully, was in you.

“Jisung please,” you cried, “I can't last any longer.”

“It’s okay baby,” he whispered, slowing his pace down to satisfy you, “cum for me.”

On cue, your body reacted in the exact way he wanted you to do, mouth wide open and eyes screwed shut as you came what felt like over and over. Jisung took you off the wall, soothingly hushing you and placing you on your desk, legs hanging on his shoulders as he allowed you to ride out your high. He, however, was on the verge too, and he was dying to ask you one thing.

“Y/n, baby, I need to bust,” he whines, making you giggle, “fuck.”

“You want to cum on my tits?”

He nodded vigorously, taking no time to pull out of you and pump himself with so much purpose. The loss of contact made you whimper, but you were easily distracted by the moans and groans that escaped his lips as the copious amount of white ropes were released, coating your, in his opinion, precious tits to a pulp. His waist shuddered, but nonetheless, Jisung was back to his gentleman self, carrying to your seat and getting the lucky tissue box on your desk, Jisung wiping the remnants of himself off your chest. You giggled at the motion, somewhat embarrassed at what had just occurred in the ‘professionalism’ of your work office. Jisung clothed himself first then grabbed your discarded items and helped you dress yourself. You had to stand, holding his hand as you stepped into your shorts and panties. 

Once the both of you were fully clothed, you pressed one more kiss to his lips, unable to rid yourself of the grin the was woven into your face. He followed, finally happy that he was able to get the girls of his dreams. Holding your hand, the two of you lingered, all of a sudden unable to look at each other.

“There’s something else that I lied about by the way.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. That wasn’t my friend. It was me.”

[seungfl0wer]

*Our Toy*

Paring: OT8 x Reader (Fem)

Genre: Smut (literally just straight porn no real plot)

Warnings: Multiple orgasms, Multiple partners (basically Polly), Restraints, slight degrading, Lots of pet names, Creampie, unprotected sex, face fucking, Double Penetration, oral (both M/F receiving), tit smacks, overstimulation uhm?? I know I definitely probably missed some

Side note wrote this 2 days apart cause of work and I was half asleep for some of it so I hope it came out not jumbled around like it seems in my head.

Kink(s): Free Use + Sharing is caring lol

˚ ༘♡Master List (Here) for the 1K Event

(The highly requested part two is here!)

-🩵

You have basically just become the boys’s fuck toy. What started off as a thought with bangchan ended up with you being free use for the rest of the members. What a good leader right? Letting them have fun with you to ease their stress, i mean in his own words “how can i keep such a beautiful thing like you only for myself?” Is Chan your boyfriend? Yeah. And the others? They basically are too. Are you complaining though? 8 attractive men horning after you wanting all your attention and love?

——————

You were sprawled out on the couch staring blankly at the tv as Felix laid on the other side of you. He had his arms lazily draped around you half watching the tv half asleep. As his eyes flickered open and close you moved yourself feeling yourself falling off the couch. You pushed your body back into the half awake boy, ass pushing firmly against his pelvis. He left out a soft whimper at the feeling, you not meaning it in anyway besides trying to get situated. He kissed your neck sweetly his arms pulling you into him even more as he slowly started to hump you. “Ah- lix” you said voice almost a whisper.

“I’m sorry do you want me to stop?” He asks his voice hazy. You shook your head no making him sigh out of relief. He placed his hands on your hips pushing his ever growing bulge against your clothed ass. His kisses were becoming sloppier as he started to suck at small spots. Both of you letting out barely audible moans at the friction. “Lix” you whimpered becoming needy. He ran his hands over your body, they caressed your breast playing with your nipples. “How do you get me so horny so fast” he whined against your skin.

His words made you giggle a little moving your hips back to meet his movements “same reason you get me soaked so fast” your words made his head reel. He pushed down his pants sprinting his cock free as he pulled yours down just enough to push his cock In. It nestled between your folds as he kept rutting into you. Your slick lubing him up as he moved. “Shit- there’s- there’s no way I’m lasting long.” He whined out. He gripped you tightly as he moved between your soaked lips.

As he slid in bottoming out you heard a door open, jisung rubbing his eyes as he came out for a drink. Felix didn’t stop though he started to move slowly but deeply into you letting out Low groans. Jisung raised an eyebrow, sipping on his drink he made his way to the living room. His eyes lit up seeing the sight below him “shit- you two are hot as fuck.” He smirked. “Lixie you sound like you’re bout ready to bust” he teased the other boy.

“Agh well- yeah she’s so- fuck- fucking warm” he said rolling his head back to look at the boy “she cum yet?” He questioned coming around to the other side. Looking at you both for an answer. “We just- started” you said breathily. Jisung smirk grew “let me help then. I mean Felix is already so close beautiful let me help you cum”

Before he even had an answer from either of you he was pulling down your shorts more. Greeted by the sight of how soaked you were, his band mates cock fucking into you so nicely. Fuck. Fuck did you look so good. He attached his lips to your clit quickly like a hungry animal he started to suck. Your head flung back giving Felix a better angle to kiss your neck. As he pumped harshly into you, the man below you eating you like a feral animal your high was approaching fast. “Jisung she’s close- god her pretty pussy is clenching so tightly around me- fucking hell she’s gonna milk me good.”

Jisung groaned hearing this moving his hand down to pump his own member as he kept giving your clit all the attention it needed. Felix pounding sloppily now into you as his high was close too. The scene unfolding was straight out of some porno. “Cu- fuck I’m cuming!” You practically screamed out cuming all over Felix’s cock as Jisung lapped up as much of your juices as he could. Felix was quick behind you as he reached his high fast feeling your warmth coat his cock as your walls clenched tightly around him. He came deep inside of you his body stuttering.

Jisung continued to suck at your overly sensitive clit before moving himself “want to stay in with me lix?” He asked the boy who was breathing heavily behind you. “Fuck yeah” he panted. He moved you a bit trying to keep Felix buried deep in you. As he got you positioned he let his cock rub against you spiting on his tip before meeting it at your entrance. Your head was spinning with so much pleasure and of course you weren’t gonna protest. He pushed into you slowly all three of you moaning out.

The feeling of Felix still inside of you, him being limp now but the extra girth driving you insane. Jisungs movements were fast and deep pushing around Felix’s cum with every thrust. “You two are so fucked out it’s so cute” he said his voice a bit shaky. “Y/n fuck you feel so good” he whined out. Felix brought his hand up to play with your clit as jisung leaned down to kiss you sloppily. His tongue instantly darting into your mouth as he sucked your lip between his teeth. Biting it ever so gently. “Jisung!” You moaned into his mouth. Your hands flung around him nails digging into his back.

“Feel good?” He said between kissed. You nod yes as he continued “gon cum on my cock next beautiful? Please- let me feel it” he moaned out letting his body fall to yours as his thrust were becoming erratic. “Ji- close ah just like that. Felix don’t stop” you barked out at the feeling. Body shaking intensely as your high crashed over your walls now clenching around both of the men. Jisungs body stuttered at the feeling dumping all his cum deep inside of you. It mixing with Felix’s and your owns.

Felix went to grab a rag to help you get all cleaned up the 3 of you sitting there heads still reeling. “How about I order some food?” Felix offers. You nod slowly laying your head down on Jisungs shoulder. “Food sounds perfect.” You said eyes half awake.

——————

Sitting in the kitchen arguing back and forth with Minho you rolled your eyes at him. “Oh whatever” you say getting up to walk out before he’s pinning you against the wall. “Excuse me?” He said eyebrows furrowed looking at you. “Is that how you talk to me now hmm? Has it been that long since I’ve punished you?” He spat brining his hand up to your face to make you look at him. You choked out a small “I” before he was pulling you down to the guest room.

He pushed you to the bed back hitting the soft mattress as he rummaged for something. Your eyes widened as you saw him pulling out the restraints. “Minho- I’m sorry” you stutter out “to late kitten” he said with a smirk “gonna ruin you till you remember who you’re talking too” he said restraining your limbs. He pull down your pants, ripping your shirt off before getting on top of you. He had already pulled his pants down you not realizing it until his cock was staring right at you.

“Open that brat mouth!” He growled making you whimper but quickly doing as he said. He gave you no mercy pushing all his length into you. He roughly fucked your face, his cock hitting the back of your throat. You gagged around his him making him chuckle “you can take it all I know you can kitten” he coo’d. He thrusted in and out of your mouth drool falling down your chin. “Fuck- there’s my kitten” he said in a low groan. His head fell back as he used your mouth mercilessly he could feel his high coming but he didn’t wanna cum just yet. Not before he could burry his cock deep into you.

He pulled out of your mouth with a popping sound, positioning himself at your entrance he looked up at you with hooded eyes. Seeing your face covered in drool made him smirk “such a messy kitten.” He said wiping it away. As he did so he slid his cock ever so slowly into you, hitting deep. He almost always could find the right angel to hit your G-spot. He started to fuck you sloppily knowing his high was already close. He slapped your breast slightly leaving a nice red print before he moved his hand to your throat.

You moaned at the pain, it feeling so pleasurable to you. Your walls clenched around him making him grunt in response “ah kitten gonna cum already?” He teased when you didn’t respond he let another smack to your breast. “I asked you a question” he growled out “uh fuck- yes m’sorry” you replied quickly this time. “Who says you’re allowed to?” He grinned that devilish bunny grin before drilling you hard. Your head was so empty at this point “p-lease” you cried out feeling yourself reaching your high.

He thrusted in a few more times before spilling his cum deep inside of you. His thrusts almost all but stopped making you whine. “Awe did kitten not get to cum? Maybe next time you’ll think twice about picking an argument with me.” He stated as he pulled out of you. The emptiness leaving you a whinny mess “no please-“ you cry out a pout plastering your face. “Don’t worry someone will come help you.” He said as he snapped a picture of you sending it to the group chat titled: Free Use.

“Maybe I’ll come get you when they’re done” he said as he shut the lights off closing the door behind him. You were so frustrated at this point pulling at the straps. A few minutes had passed before you heard someone enter the room it was hyunjin coming to see you. “Hey there my love” he hummed looking over your body. “Whatcha do to make Minho do this?” He said teasing you, he quickly leaned down to kiss your soft lips. “He said I was giving him attitude.”You pouted.

“He’s probably right you do, do that a lot” he chuckled kissing you again “he didn’t let you cum did he?” He asked now making his way to your heated core. You shook your head no looking as the man moved “ah want me to help you love?” He said his voice soft. You nod “please” your voice barely audible at this point. He smiled unzipping his pants he had on, discarding them somewhere in the room. “Gonna help me cum too?” He said softly as he ran the cock head up and down your still soaked folds. “Y-yes” you stuttered out.

“That’s my girl” he said getting his body underneath of you. He angled himself just right before pushing up into you. His arms wrapped around your body pulling you as close as possible before fucking you like som horny rabbit. “Ah hyune” you moaned out his body already twitching at the feeling. “Shit- the picture he sent out was so fucking hot-“ he said pulling you into a sloppy make out session. “I could- could have came just at the sight- fuck y/n you’re so fucking hot” he moaned out his words running together.

He moved his hands down to your chest playing with your nipples as he sucked one breast. Hyunjin was always so passionate and loving during sex. When situations were like this though? He was extra loving. His goals was always to just please you, make you cum first and then finish himself. Normally when you came is when he was letting himself go.

Hyunjin pulled away from the kiss pulling your bottom lip between his teeth with a soft bite. “God- y/n I can’t get over how perfect you are” he said through breaths. He ran a hand down to your clit now making perfect circles as he thrusted sloppily into you. He bottomed out hitting your g-spot swiftly. You both let out sinful moans, the sounds of you both filled the room in such harmony. “Gon cum on my cock pretty? Gon make a mess?”

You nod yes your mind completely and utterly (and literally) fucked. Your mind was so blank from the pleasure and over stimulation your body shook. “That’s it my love cum all over me, I’ll fill this cunt in return hm?” He rambled. He leaned back a bit as he watched you take his cock in and out so nicely. His high coming fast as he felt your walls clench around him. “That’s it- fuck yes- cum for me baby” he groaned.

Your head flung back finally getting the release you so desperately needed. Gushing around his cock he spilled deep into you filling you with all of his. He wrapped his arms around you kissing you lovingly. “You ok love?” He asked trying to still catch his breath. “Mhm” you nodded giving his cheek a soft peck. The door cracked open “she still in there?” A familiar voice asked “I don’t know dude go in and check.” Another voice said. Hyunjin chuckled a bit “I think you have some more hungry men coming for you.”

As moved away from you, your head still in the clouds from him he kissed your forehead. “I’ll tell them to go easy” he said sweetly chuckling as he opened the door “be gentle guys” he said patting the two younger boys. “I will I don’t know about this freak though” Jeongin laughed poking at Seungmin.

“Look at what that bratty little mouth gets you into” Seungmin laughed looking down at you. “Maybe this was her plan?” Jeongin added. The other boy shrugged at his words “probably she’s a little whore” he said leaning down to you. “Didn’t ask Minho about the restraints?” He added. Jeongin nodded “yeah, he said to let her off but to make sure she’s ruined first” he grinned.

Jeongin went to untie your legs Seungmin having other ideas first. He dropped his pants straddling your chest like Minho had before. “Open up pup I got you a bone” he chuckled at his words. Your mind was still in space your mouth opening out of reflex. “Good girl” he said pushing the tip into your mouth. “Don’t you wanna untie her hands first?” Jeongin asked looking up at the other man. He shook his head quickly “no she can keep her hands tied until I have my fun”

Seungmin was using your mouth, fucking into you not as rough as Minho but just about. He was hitting the back of your throat precum dripping from it. He took your head pushing it roughly as he fucked into you. Jeongin on the other hand was leaving sweet kisses to your thighs as he pulled his own pants down. He grinned his cock up and down your folds “you’re such a mess baby, you’ve taken what 2 loads already? You really are gonna be full.” He said his eyes half open.

“By the time we are done she’s gonna be gushing with all of our cum.” He hissed. You moaned against his cock eyes fluttering open and close. The three of you letting out soft moans and grunts. Jeongin started to play with your clit making your back arch and legs shake a bit. You were so overstimulated already you didn’t know if you could take it anymore. “Fuck you’re taking my cock so well such a good little pup hm?” He said sliding his hand down your neck and back up.

“I can’t hold out any longer dude” Jeongin said as he pushed himself into you. You let out a muffled moan around seungmins cock making the man’s head fall backwards in pleasure. “Fuck-“ he spat out. Jeongins movements were fast and sloppy. His thrusts spilling the others’s cum out of you. The sound of his ball slapping your wet cunt filled the air. You were getting used so well.

“Ah fuck baby you’re so fucking wet” jeongin moaned out. “Yeah she likes being out little fuck toy huh? Like us using all your holes like this? Filthy little mutt” Seungmin babble on. You could only reply with a moan in confirmation. When people say your mind goes blank from pleasure this is what they mean. Your head was so empty only thoughts of them. “Fuck dude I’m close, let’s switch” Seungmin asked pulling out of your mouth. Drool ran down your chin, lips swollen from all the abuse to your mouth.

Jeongin nodded switching spots with the other man. Jeongin wiped the drool from you kissing your forehead softly. He removed your hand restrains letting your them fall to your sides. “Wanna open for me baby?” He coo’d. You were about to nod but Seungmin had mercilessly pushed deep into you fast. Bottoming out quick as he hit the back of your walls. Hit cock head hitting your g-spot as he pushed in and out of you. You left out the most desperate whine making jeongin smirk. “Give me your hands baby I’ll keep you here.”

Jeongin interlocked your fingers together as he pushed the tip into your mouth. He let you take your time with him knowing you were already through the wringer today. “My sweet baby, you’re doing so well” he praised you letting go of one of your hands to wipe away a hair.

Seungmin was in his own little world right now as he fucked brain dead into you. He was going stupid, pounding deep into you. “Shit- you gonna cum? You’re clenching so much around me fuck- gonna- agh- not gonna-“ seungmins words ran together as his high was at its peak. “Your pussy is sucking me so good. My dirty little pup gonna take all my cum?” He said tongue hanging out. He started to leave circles on your throbbing clit making your body jolt. As it did you took all of jeongin into your mouth deep. “Ah- fuck-“ he groaned out.

“Y/n!” Seungmin almost screamed out as he dumped all his cum inside of you. You could feel his ball releasing all of him inside of you. “Shit- I’m close” Jeongin said as he listened to you moaning from the feeling of being stuffed again. “Dude I don’t think I can move” Seungmin said his chest heaving. Jeongin nodded pushing in and out of your mouth a bit rougher now chasing his own high. “Fuck- listen keep playing with that perfect clit.” Jeongin demanded which Seungmin happily obliged.

You could feel yourself coming undone and in a matter of seconds your high was crashing around you yet again. This time it was more intense. Your body shook eyes pricked with tears as Jeongin came half way in your mouth the other half on your chest. “Shi- I’m sorry” he mumbled out. All three of you were panting trying to catch your breath. Minho had come to knock on the door “alright guys let y/n have a break” he said softly standing in the doorway now. Jeongin went to grab you a towel as seungmin wrapped his arms around you.

He peppered small kisses to your shoulder “such a good girl, you’re such a good girl” he repeated trying to sooth you from your high. After getting cleaned up and everything the boys laid beside you curled up into their arms. Minho smiled at the scene pulling the covers over you all kissing your head softly. “Get some rest kitten”

——————

You had surprised Chan at the studio with some of his favorite food. You both sat and chatted while you devoured the delicious food. “Chan you still here?” A voice asked as the door opened. “Oh hey y/n! Wait! You brought food and didn’t ask me to come down” he whined. Chan and you both chuckled “don’t be silly Binnie I brought you some too!” You said pulling a bag from the side. “I figured you were here” you said smiling passing him the bag. The three of you sat and chatted before the two men went about their work.

You sat there on your phone just scrolling until you saw something pop up. You giggled a little sending it to Chan who looked at it right away. He turned around with a shit eating grin “first why is this popping up for you and two come take your place princess.” Chan moved his chair back placing one of the hoodies he has draped over the other chair on the floor. Changbin tilted his head “what are you doing?” He asked curiously. Chan doesn’t say anything just shows him the picture. It’s a picture of someone on their knees under the desk with a massive cock in their mouth as the man above does work. The caption reads: Two Kinds of work loads.

Changbin shook his head chuckling a bit. “Y/n sometimes I think your sex drive can out match all of us” he laughed harder. You roll your eyes “so you’re saying you don’t want me to do it to you too?” You said teasingly. He coughed his words getting stuck in his throat “I- that’s not what I said” Chan laughed this time pointing at the other man “you got him all flustered y/n”

You got into position under the desk Chan having his pants down just enough for you to get to his half harden cock. You gulped back saliva your moth watering at the sight. “All mine” you said giving his head soft kisses. “All yours princess” he coo’d back at you. You slowly started to take his length as he tried to focus on working. Changbin had moved his chair close to you looking down at you with hooded eyes. You smiled letting your free hand lay on his bulge that was growing in his pants.

A few minutes went by Bins aching cock tight in his pants. He moved your hand softly to the side before pulling his joggers down his thick cock sprung out dripping with precum already. You moved from sucking Chan to sucking Bin letting your hand play with Chans long veiny cock. Both of the sexy men above you let out small grunts and groans as you had your fun below the table. A bit into this switching back and forth you were back at Chan. His hands reached down pulling your head fully down his cock, making you gag.

He let out the most sinful noise, your already dripping core clenching around nothing at the sound of him. You looked up at him eyes glassed over. He smiled down at you “c’mere princess let me make you feel good.” He said bringing you up as he cupped your face “lay on the couch” he said fondly as he stripped you of your bottoms. He licked his lips as he started down at your core dripping with arousal. “Shit-“ he let out softly before diving into your dripping cunt. He sucked harshly at your clit pushing 2 fingers into you.

He pumped his arm into slowly but deeply, arching his fingers in you hitting all your sweet spots. You left out sweet moans gripping onto his head. You looked over at the other man who was sitting there mouth open as he jerked himself off. “Bin- c’mere” you said voice hot. It took him a moment to realize what you had said before quickly getting up. He kneeled beside you “yes bunny?” He asked sweetly. You open your mouth slightly looking up at him with puppy dog eyes “wanna make you feel good”

Bin was slowly fucking your mouth, he was so gentle and tender as he did so. While he was doing that Chan was getting pussy drunk. He was devouring every inch of your body trembling under him. You pulled away from bin for only a second “close” you groaned out. Chan picked up his pace fucking his hand into you more as he felt your walls clench around them. You gripped onto bins hands making him melt into you as you came undone.

Bin sat on the couch holding you up as he moved you on top of him. His cock poking at your entrance, Chan also positioned himself about you. “Princess if you can’t take us both you tell me ok?” Chan said softly looking down at you. You nodded yes in agreement, you’ve done this before but with a different smaller member. Bin was really girth and putting it together with Chan long cock was, well let’s just say an automatic orgasm.

Bin pushed into you first moving a bit before Chan joined in. Both cocked filled your pussy so full. So so full. “Fucking hell” you moaned out grabbing onto Chan quickly. After they gave you some time to settle that was it. All three of you were so desperate, searching for you won highs as you fucked. The sounds of you pussy being violated like this were hot but not hotter that the sounds of the two men. God. Was it hot. They fucked into you good and deep hitting your g-spot stretching your hole.

You felt your body getting tight again feeling those wires about to snap once more. Your pussy gripped around them so tightly making them moan in response. “Y/n ah fuck close” bin babbled “gonna fill you” he said holding onto you tightly. Chan wasn’t doing much better every movement brought him closer and closers. His body shaking as he pushed deep into you. “Y/n- fuck I love you augh princess I love you so much.” He said with a long groan.

Chan brought down his hand to play with your clit as changbin started to play with your breast. At the stimulation you gasped nails digging into Chans back. Your body shook hard as those wires broke one by one. “Cuming!” You almost screamed out creaming around both of their cocks. The feeling making changbin buck his hips one more time before spilling inside you. Chan road out your high as his crashed, his cock twitching as he dumped himself into.

Changbins muscles gave out as you all tumbled to the couch. You all sat there panting, you feeling all the cum drip down your leg. “Here- princess” Chan breathed out taking tissues to clean you up. “My pretty bunny” bin said kissing your neck. “She did so well hmm?” He asked looking at Chan “she did so very well” he said kissing you cheek.

💙 If you’d like to read more of my stuff you can find it Here: Master List . Thank you for reading and if requests are open or you just wanna talk feel free to send me something🩵

[niki-phoria]

pairing: jisung x 8th member!gn!reader (no pronouns used) genre: nightmare comfort word count: 598

includes: reader is implied to be shorter than jisung, idk if jisung still sleeps on the couch or not but just go with it, written with male reader in mind

a/n: still debating whether or not i want to start writing for dream so until i make up my mind enjoy a fluffy jisung drabble bc i'm in love with him <33

it feels like a weight has been pressed against your chest. the air has been forced out of your lungs, leaving you desperately gasping for air when you’re finally released from the monsters plaguing your own head. a thin layer of sweat covers most of your skin - a physical reminder of the discomfort that still lingers.

you push the covers off of your body before glancing over at where renjun is still peacefully sleeping on the bed across from you. the familiar sight brings you a small amount of comfort, though you find yourself longing for something else. someone else. 

the floor feels cool against your bare feet as you swing your legs off of the side of the bed. you shake off the last of your doubts as you stand up, quietly making your way over to your bedroom door and disappearing from the room.

the trek through your hallway is a short one. you run your fingers along the wall beside you as you carefully make your way through the dorm, careful not to trip on anything that could be unexpectedly in your path. 

you find jisung laying on the couch, wrapped up in a thick blanket. despite his overly long limbs being curled up slightly to accommodate for the small amount of space, his limbs sometimes slip off of the edges. 

he stirs when you softly chuckle at the sight, rolling over to flip onto his side. “y/n?” jisung mumbles. blinking up at you through tired eyes he watches as you cautiously take another step across the hardwood floor in his direction. your steps are feather-light - almost as if you’re worried of disturbing him from his rest. 

jisung props himself up on his elbow, squinting at you in the darkness. despite the dim lighting, he can recognize the loose fit of a t-shirt you must’ve stolen from him. 

“come here,” he gestures. the blanket that had previously been wrapped around his body pools around his lap as he outstretches his arms towards you. catching your bottom lip between your teeth, you quickly make your way over to the couch. jisung shifts to the side before all but pulling you down so you’re sitting down on the cushions beside him. 

his hands feel warm against your skin as jisung brushes his fingertips against your cheek. you coil into his touch, eyes fluttering shut at the desperately needed comfort. “what’s wrong?” he whispers. his voice has dropped dramatically, barely audible despite the silence. 

“nothing. just a… stupid nightmare.” 

a slight frown tugs at the corners of jisung’s lips. he reaches out with his left hand, gently tugging your body even closer towards him. you’re quick to reciprocate, wrapping your own arms around his waist and leaning your head against his shoulder. 

you can feel the hesitation in each of jisung’s movements as he cautiously begins to rub a comforting hand against your back. you find yourself chasing after his warmth almost unconsciously - chasing after the safety that always seems to come with being wrapped up in his arms. 

a few comfortable minutes of silence pass before jisung speaks again. his voice is soft as it cuts through the quiet - the words quietly mumbled into the crook of your neck. “do you want to talk about it?” 

“no,” you murmur, relaxing further against his touch. sleepiness slowly begins to creep up on you once again as your eyes slowly begin to flutter closed. “just wanna stay with you. if that’s okay.” 

“of course it is,” he smiles, leaning down to press a chaste kiss against your forehead. 

if you want to support me please consider leaving a like, comment, or rebloging !! and if you enjoyed this fic check out my txt or enha works :))

[baby-yongbok]

Poly SKZ!Fake Texts - "Your nails are too long"

✧ Pairing: Ot8!Skz x Afab!Reader - explicit content [ MDNI ] ✧ CW: Themes of marking, Jeongin being a menace and Seungmin being a snitch

✧ a/n: I have writers block & burnout so another fake text post for you all! I write these the most. I'm usually just casually creating them soooo until I can actually finish a fic please enjoy these!❣️

✧ Masterlist ✧

MDNI & Support made by @strangergraphics

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@krayzieestay, @soulsbbg , @stay-bi , @yzsqu , @gho-ster , @lghtdarling

[jeonjungkookenthusiast1997]

This was a super cute read 😍 I really liked the radio phone in scene and the ending was just perfect 🥰 thank you for sharing your lovely work 💙

Hellfire | Han Jisung

✧ Genre: Soulmate!au, angst, fluff

✧ Summary: When you were still an innocent, naïve child, you happily dreamt of fighting dragons to save the prince from his tower and sailing on the sea with your pirate comrades. These days, you can hardly recall the last time you had felt happiness in the realm outside of your dreams - and when you start to feel the side effects of an antidepressant, even your safe space becomes a hellfire.

✧ Word Count: 3.4k

✧ Want to read other parts of this series? Check out my masterlist!

✧ Trigger Warning: mentions of depression, mental illness, and implied suicidal thoughts + side effects of prescription drugs

                                         ✧

 When, exactly, was the last time you felt relatively normal? Not in the sense of an establish lifestyle, per say, rather in the idea of your safe space of a bubble being sprinkled with meaningful emotions tied into your day to day life. You couldn’t quite recall the last time you felt truly… happy, outside of the dark nights in which you curled up into a roll of thin blankets and let your eyes flutter shut as the drowsiness swept over your senses, leading you into a deep sleep.

 Even now, as you flipped through the pages of your sketchbook in the middle of art class, much to the displeasure of the teacher attempting to show the quaint class a new technique in the form of oil paintings, you felt the lingering traces of joy running through your veins; but nothing that overwhelmed your brain with happiness. The art teacher paid you no mind, though, the younger woman knowing too well that a majority of her students interested in the arts had the odd habit of doodling away in their treasured sketchbooks - even in the midst of one of her own lessons.

 You stopped flipping idly through the tattered pages of the practically ancient leatherback book momentarily, pausing at the familiar sight of a drawing you had made a couple of months ago. The piece screamed something relative to a sort of childish innocence, the sandstone tower peaking out over a horde of spruce trees resembling one you might have seen in a storybook when you were younger. But you knew better than that, as it was only one of the many illustrations inspired by the colorful dreams you shared with the boy who was considered to be your other half by the widely expanding universe itself.

 Perched atop the pale, sort of yellowish fantasy tower was a swamp green dragon baring its stained fangs at the approaching shadow of what looked to be a woman clad in heavy plated armor, the delicate trim of the steel ridges visible even on the thick, tan paper. From the strange, singular window punched out in the sandstone mold resting under the body of the snarling beast there was the silhouette of a boy your age peeking out from over its edge in curiosity, his faint blonde hair dusted with the faint streaks of light pouring out from the sun that wasn’t even on the page itself. In the dreams that the two of you shared pretty much every night or then some, you and the boy who called himself Han would partake in various adventures; from slaying dragons to sailing across the stormy sea in search of buried treasure, the two of you were meant to be - quite literally.

 Unfortunately, the ache in your heart that never seemed to fade away for good had come back even stronger than it ever had before, only a few weeks ago too. Usually you tried to suck it up and settle with the events of each passing day, but the new wave left you with little to no motivation, as well as general exhaustion. You weren’t too sure why the exhaustion seemed to stop you from dreaming like you normally did, although you had a hunch that it was a way of the universe telling you to seek help before your connection to Han was lost permanently - and you most certainly were not about to let that happen.

 You had lost many a battle to depression, ranging from the love of painting on a blank canvas to dancing alone in your room to the sound of your beloved music - but you refused to lose Han, the boy whom you called your soulmate. Nothing could take him away from you, not even your own mind.

 Paroxetine, otherwise known as Paxil on the white label stuck to the orange cylinder containing the pills, had been prescribed to you about a week ago, give or take a day or two, by your doctor. Upon the concerns of your therapist, a kind and upbeat woman by the name of Barb [who was a foreigner that grew up in South Korea,] you had decided a while ago to ask your doctor about taking antidepressants. Technically you had been medically diagnosed with depression two years ago, though you opted to try and go through the motions of the mental illness by yourself instead of popping pills - up until now, that is. While there wasn’t a definitive change that you could pinpoint, you did feel a bit more relaxed and focused on the activities you adored.

 You were hoping that the pills would also assist in the return of your safe space - your dreams. You missed being able to go on wild, out of this world adventures with Han a lot; and deep down, you figured that he missed you, too. The first five nights were filled with silenced sleep, not even a hint of a fictional world brewing in your head at any given occasion during the night.

 Perhaps you shouldn’t have wished for the land of dreams to return so quickly.

 No exits. No end in sight. No perspectives other than your own haunting field of vision.

 Every twenty-seven years, an evil entity by the name of “It” would emerge from the bellowing shadows of the town of Derry, Maine. You had read the long novel pertaining the story countless times, spurred on by the delight of witnessing yet another of Stephen King’s pieces play out in your head with each word he scratched onto the paper of his desk. Just last year in early September the horror novel had been subject to a modern sort of remake, taking on the identity of both the book itself on the older television series broadcasting before you had even been born. The horrific tale was one you loved dearly, being an avid King fan for so long, but not once did you ever think you would so fall victim to the gruesome monster yourself.

 The Losers Club was nowhere to be seen as you stumbled down the empty street of Derry, not a sound to be heard other than your frantic screams and heavy breathing while your legs carried you down the pavement past the old houses and white picket fences lining their yards, strewn with yellow and orange painted leaves that fell from the trees dotting the landscape. It had been chasing you down the street for what felt like hours, the entity clad in its classic clown getup. You weren’t too sure why the clown hadn’t taken on some other terrifying form, since it fed off of fear itself and usually chose to scare its victims half to death before preying on their corpses - but that was the last thing on your mind as you continued to dart away from the nasty predator.

 Then, just as you turned a sharp corner to hopefully find solace in the woods behind town, an arm snapped out from behind the library and tugged you towards them quickly. Your head whips around to spot whoever had grabbed you, only your fearful eyes have caught an all too familiar gaze.

 “H-Han?”

 “Shh, he’s going to hear us! Be quiet and he’ll ignore us for now.” The blonde murmurs in a rush, gently planting the warm palm of his hand over your parted lips for good measure as he forces your body and his own to crouch down behind an overgrown patch of shrubbery. You will your racing heartbeat to slow down, both out of the sudden appearance of the serious boy and the undying fear of being caught by the clown, while you lean against said teenager for both physical and emotional support.

 Somehow the clown manages to miss you two entirely, sauntering creepily out of town and into the dense woodland; likely seeking you out so he could make you his next bloody victim. Han lets out a soft sigh of relief, dropping his hand from your mouth and letting his back relax against the wall of the white chipped library panels.

 Feeling a wave of similar relief wash over your exhausted body, you scoot backwards and rest your head against his shoulder. “I’m… sorry, about this, Han.” You whisper to the boy softly in apology.

 “Hey, don’t worry about it - you can’t control which mind we end up sharing. I guess I just pulled the shortest straw this time.” He chuckled in an attempt to cheer you up, letting one of his plush cheeks rest on the top of your head of hair. “On another note, I’ve been missing you Y/N - you’ve been sleeping well, right?”

 Of course he would notice your sudden absence from sharing dreams with him - every night since the day you both figured out the whole connection you both looked forward to being able to see each other after you drifted off into sleep. Neither of you could exactly decide which dream conjured you would share, and of course there was the random nightmare quite like this one, but in general it was still a fun experience - it was reasonable enough that he was worried that you hadn’t been dreaming recently.

 “I’ve been doing fine, Han,” you lied through gritted teeth, “just a bit stressed from school and all that bullshit. I guess the stress is affecting my head so much that I just don’t dream as often.” It wasn’t really a lie, but you knew too well why you’d been absent from the soulmate connection the past couple of weeks - your depression had happened to strangle you out of nowhere, and your head seemed pretty preoccupied in trying to fight it off instead of letting you get the experience of seeing your soulmate every night.

 “Well, on the plus side we’ll all be on break for a few weeks. I think I might have earned enough money to come visit you!” He breathes out, one of his hands coming to rest on your thigh as he squeezes it out of sheer excitement. “We can finally meet each other in person and - and maybe on our next break you can come to my hometown and meet all of my friends too!”

 “I would love that - oh shit, run!” You stumble as you try to quickly stand up, seeing that the fucking clown had to ruin the moment and pop up just feet away, staring creepily at the pair of you leaning against the wall. The once peaceful boy beside you followed your lead, only to grab your hand with his own and charge away from the back of the library.

 The rest of the nightmare was just like that single instance - the two of you would find a hiding spot from It and stay there as long as you could, chatting away and comforting one another with warm cuddles; then the cycle would repeat itself when the creature inevitably found you again and chased you around the town of Derry.

 When you finally woke up from the hellish nightmare that had only been somewhat bearable by Han’s presence, you realized that your forehead was covered in beads of sweat and your chest was heaving for air. With a startled gasp you push yourself up into a more relaxed sitting position on your bed, noticing how the sheets had ridden up to your thighs and the pillows decorating the comforter had mostly been tossed onto the floor below it.

 You glance down at your thigh, lazily tracing the skin where Han’s hand had been what felt like hours ago - he tried his best to comfort you whenever you were frightened or upset, but sometimes you wished that the two of you lived closer together rather than many miles apart. Then, he could actually comfort you in real life and you could go on adventures together in the real world. You just wished he was there with you.

 “Goood afternoon ladies and gents! You are listening to 3RACHA Radio this lovely day, welcome, welcome! Unfortunately SPEARB and CB97 could not make it since they’re college kids doing the whole adult thing, I’m sure some of you can relate~”

 “Oh, honey turn it up!” Your mom coos excitedly upon hearing the familiar voice echo through the stereo in the car, her fingers drumming lightly on the steering wheel as she drives you home from a therapy appointment.

 “God, sometimes I think you like these guys more than I do.” You snicker teasingly to the older woman, complying to her wishes and turning the volume on the radio station up so the voice of the host could be made clearer and easier to hear. You had discovered the interesting radio station just a few months ago, though you could’ve guessed that it had been airing a bit longer than the time you found it; they called themselves 3RACHA. They were radio hosts, producers, and regular students.

 “Shhh, J.ONE is talking-!” She hisses playfully, effectively silencing you while the pair of you listen to the host speak.

 “Anyway, I will run the show alone for now - so welcome to J.ONE’s solo talk show! To start things up, I was thinking that we could bring back a segment where we take the time to do some soulmate one-on-one, since a lot of you missed it while us three were busy doing other stuff. If you want to talk about your darling soulmate, whether it be hoping that you might find them here or just need some advice about your rather complicated connections, just dial the following number and I will pick three people to talk to-”

 You weren’t quite sure why you found yourself digging your phone out of the pocket of your pants, or why your fingers typed away at the keypad as you listened to J.ONE list out the phone number to the show. Maybe you just wanted to talk to someone, anyone besides your mom and therapist about Han - and who knew, maybe he was tuning into the radio show as well.

 “Hello, welcome to 3RACHA Soulmate Talk! Who am I speaking to right now?”

 “Uhh… Y/N, sorry I didn’t actually think I’d go through.” You breathe out, hearing J.ONE take in a deep inhale of his own after you’d mentioned your name. “H-hello?”

 “R-right, my bad, I just know someone with the same name is all! So what is up, Y/N? Is your soulmate giving you hell - does J.ONE need to beat someone up?”

 “That’s certainly reassuring, I suppose,” you giggle over the line, ignoring your mom’s wiggling eyebrows in the corner of your eyes, “um, well, it’s kind of the opposite of that - I feel really bad for my soulmate.”

 “What for, pumpkin?”

 “Well, our connection is where we share our dreams together, if that makes sense - his name is Han, by the way… maybe he’s listening. Sorry, I got off track! Um, basically I’ve been having a rough time the past two years. I was diagnosed with depression back then, and for the most part I could deal with it until recently - I got some prescription pills that sort of help, but one of the side-effects is more frequent nightmares.”

 “That - I’m truly sorry to hear that, Y/N,” J.ONE mumbles through his microphone at the empty studio, “I hope everything gets better for you.”

 “Thanks… well, when we share our dreams it’s kind of a fifty-fifty percent chance on which one we go to; for some reason the past three weeks have just been mine, but like I said it’s all been these hellish nightmares. I feel really bad since it’s technically my fault for putting him through all of this-”

 “Absolutely not!” The radio host roared, only to clear his throat awkwardly. “You have nothing to apologize to him - this Han guy, for. If - if he knows, or maybe he’s listening right now, he should understand that soulmates are bonded together till the end of your days, and that this is only one of the many experiences you will go through together as a team. So if Han is tuning in, why don’t you tell him how you feel, truly?”

 “Okay, I - Han, if you’re really out there right now, I can’t wait to actually meet you in person one day. You’re one of the people in my life who make me stronger, and… I love you.”

 “… that was beautiful, Y/N. I hope that Han is listening right now, because he is one lucky guy. Take care of yourself, alright? I’m sure that he can’t wait to see you, too.”

 “Yeah, I guess you’re right - thanks for listening to me ramble, J.ONE.”

 “No, pumpkin, thank you for calling in today. Alright listeners, we’re uh, gonna take a quick break while I go and get a drink, stay tuned for the next two talkers on the 3RACHA Soulmate Talk!”

 You fully expected yet another dreadful nightmare to conquer your thoughts during you nap - you hadn’t really meant to suddenly fall asleep after you got home from school, but then again you’d been so anxious to get home all day since it was the final day of school until fall break.

 But what greeted you as you opened your eyes in the state of sleep was anything but a nightmare.

 A field of flowers stood proudly before you, stretching across the green grass for miles upon miles from what you could see. Across the horizon, the dreamlike sun was starting to set behind a forest of trees, its yellow and orange rays dotting the landscape and casting faint shadows onto the ground while the sky dipped itself into a hue of pink and blue.

“Goood afternoon ladies and gents! You are listening to 3RACHA Radio this lovely day, welcome, welcome! Unfortunately SPEARB and -”

 You turn your head in surprise, hearing the same exact words from just days ago ringing out from what looked to be a lone stereo set on the field before you. Standing beside it was Han, his hands folded neatly in the pockets of a denim jacket while he rocked back and forth on the heels of his shoes.

 “Han?”

 “It uh - actually it’s J.ONE - okay that’s just my radio name, my real name is Jisung… Han Jisung, actually.” The blonde speaks nervously, his gaze looking anywhere but your own curious one that pierced holes into his skin. “M-my close friends call me Jisung, and I am kind of like… in love with you so if you wanna call me that you can and-”

 “Hon-”

 “S..meone at - f..ont door!”

 You shoot off of the couch in a flurry of sudden emotion and confusion, blinking a couple times while your mom frantically shakes your shoulders to help you wake up. It was clear that Han - Jisung had suddenly woken up from his dream, and at the same time your mom had caused you to wake up as well.

 “Hey, there’s a group of boys your age at the front door - one of them said his friend was looking for you!” The older woman insists, practically bouncing on her heels as she helps you stand up from the plush couch and walks you over to the cracked door, going to stand off to the side. Too tired and befuddled to think clearly, you slowly open the front door to be greeted by three boys, none of which you had the pleasure of meeting before.

 One of them, a boy just taller than you with cute freckles splattered across his cheeks, bowed a bit to you in greeting, appearing to be hiding someone behind him - how strange.

 “Erm, you’re Y/N, right?” He questions you, letting out a sigh of relief when you nod groggily at him in reply. “Thank god we got the right house - shit, this is probably super sudden, but uh… I’m Felix, one of Jisung’s friends,”

 “I’m Hyunjin!”

 “- and I’m Seungmin.”

 There was no fucking way.

 “Ta-da~” All three of them echoed at the same time, separating just enough to reveal the yawning, chubby-cheeked boy behind them.

 You had to be dreaming.

 “- h-hi, pumpkin… surprise?”

 You didn’t utter a word, too stunned to do anything but let your lips gape in shock and your eyes start to water in overwhelming emotions. Taking one look at you, Jisung chuckled softly and took a step closer to you, wrapping his arms around your neck and pulling you into his chest.

 “I’m so glad that you never hurt yourself, pumpkin - I’m so fucking glad that you’re still here, even after fighting for so long.”

 For once, you were happy that you weren’t dreaming.

                                         ✧

[neodreamzenie]

Imagine

Turn Those Tears Into A Smile p.js

Genre: Fluff

Wc: 0.1k

You and your boyfriend planned on hanging out at your place together, but before he could even arrive at yours, you texted him, saying, "Don't come over. I'm really not in the mood rn." To which he replies with, "Baby, what's wrong?" You text back in tears, "I don't want you to see me upset." ... No answer... About 10 minutes later, he shows up at your door with your favourite sweets, an iced americano from Starbucks and one of his favourite sweatshirts. "You know, I will always see you upset because I wanna be the reason to turn those tears into a smile." All of that really made you smile. "I love you, Park Jisung."