#Jan 31st 2025 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

if-whats-new · 1 month ago

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What's New In IF? Issue 2 (2025)

By Bex, Dion, Briar and Peter

Now Available!

Itch.io - Keep Reading below

If you read the zine, consider liking the post: it helps us see how many people see it! And sharing is caring! <3

~ EDITORIAL ~

It’s time for a revival!

As you might have noticed, our Column section has been dead for a while. We feel like it’s time to do something about that!

Want to write 1-2 pages about a neat topic, or deep-dive into a game and review it in details? Share personal experiences or get all academic?

Send us a message and we will be happy to feature it in our future Issues!

There’s power in numbers!

Are you an IF fan and would like a way to give back to the community? We’re once again looking for new members of our Team!

Do you enjoy keeping up with updates and finding new gems? Maybe you even enjoy working with Google Sheets?

Then our Tracker of News position is made just for you!

BEX, DION, BRIAR AND PETER

~ ANNOUNCEMENTS ~

Most importantly:

WNiIF? is switching to a bi-weekly schedule!

Keeping up with news and releasing a new Issue every week is exhausting. We have decided to change it up a bit, hopefully preventing a possible burnout. We also hope that this will give us more time to make every Issue a bit better.

We thank you for your understanding.

What else?

Our X/Twitter account is no longer active. Please check out our other social media to keep an eye on releases and news.

We plan on releasing a special What’s 2024 in IF? Issue summing up all Issues that came out last year. This will include New Releases, Event Highlights, Columns, Game Highlights and more, making it easier for new readers to check out the Zine. The date of release is not set yet, but hopefully soon!

More exciting stuff is to be unveiled in the upcoming Issues!

~ EVENT SPOTLIGHT : Queer Vampire Game Jam 2025 ~

🦇 🥀 🕯 🪦 🩸

Queer Vampire Game Jam is a month-long interactive fiction game jam hosted by kit, nyehilism, that will run from January 10 - February 20th, 2025. The goal of this jam is to create more interactive fiction games about queer vampires, focusing both on queer relationships and queer experiences as told through a vampiric narrative.

Last year’s edition had over 50 amazing submissions. Give them a look too!

~ ENDED ~

The Queer Winter Game Jam is in full swing. Those interested can submit their work until January 16th 2025.

~ VOTING ~

Feeling nostalgic about the golden age of text adventures? Relive those days by participating in PunyComp 2024!

IF Short Games Showcase 2024 is a great way to shine some new light on projects made in the past year (Jan 1, 2024 to Dec 31, 2024). You now have until January 25th 2025 to vote.

~ ONGOING (SUBMITTING) ~

Media depicting healthy examples of polyamory isn’t that common. The PolyJamorous 2024 is trying to break the status-quo!

ShuffleComp is a musical interactive fiction competition where you make games based on songs, which are submitted by other entrants. Creators have until January 20th 2025 to upload their works.

Once upon a time, a game jam was held to create stories around the theme of fairy tales… and that game jam is the Once Upon A Time VN Jam. It’s running from October 1st to January 31st.

Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2025 is for all French-speaking enthusiasts. Submissions are accepted March 3rd 2025.

The Black Visual Novel Jam is all about working with creative professional developers who work in visual novels to bring more Black stories to life. The goal is to create a space where Black creators can show their unique storytelling through visual novels.

SeedComp! is a 2-round interactive fiction game jam, focusing on creativity and the growth of ideas and the Sprouting Round has just started! Check out the Planting round for inspiration.

BL stands for Boys' Love, a genre that focuses on romantic and emotional relationships between male characters. The Ultimate BL Visual Novel Game Jam is all about that!

Are you a fan of Vampires? Then lucky for you, because the Queer Vampire Game Jam is back!

Sealed With A Kiss Jam 2025 is a fantastical romance jam for all VN lovers!

The eighth annual Ace Jam is a game jam about creating games with asexual spectrum characters.

~ NEW RELEASE ~

Joyride To Hell (Ren’Py) After weeks of not hearing from your girlfriend she called you panicked, wanting to meet up with you. You want nothing more to do with her. But as they say, forgiveness is a virtue.

The Shadow Over Cyberspace (Ren’Py) From the same creators of Arcade Spirits. Time is running out, barter with gods, embrace the deathless aeons, or go offline permanently.

Full moon. Cold night. Dark shadow. Warm gun. The Beast of Glenkildove has stalked Ireland for centuries. Now, you must hunt it in Hunter: The Reckoning — The Beast of Glenkildove (CScript).

In Five Candles in the Meadow (Twine) even in the far flung future, penpals still exist. With a sea of stars between them, two young adults keep correspondence as best they can, with lone data relays acting as their heavenly messengers. @windsoflimbo

As always, don't forget to check out the submitted entries to the events mentioned in the previous pages. They deserve some love too!

~ NEW RELEASE (WIP) ~

After Mina Murray is reunited with her childhood friends Jonathan and Lucy Harker, they are all invited on a cruise to Transylvania with a mysterious man named Count Dracula. - Syndromedia's Dracula (Ren’Py)

Rite of Decay (Ren’Py) or, Sense in Self; The testimony of one Nastya V. Yarocz, Rot Physician, on the peculiar happenings at Pavia Manor following the death of honoured Guest Lord Kallistos of Arkhé. And on the even more curious romances she has forged therein.

House of Prestidigitation (CScript) is a school of magic game, a chance for you to pursue a specialty in the magical arts while competing in extra-curricular events, investigating clandestine clubs, and preventing a disastrous curse from carrying away the House before the end of term! You can also explore the strange history of the House itself, or turn your attention towards more romantic endeavours.

What will you do now that you find yourself in the captain’s chair of a starship tasked with exploration and diplomacy? Forge your name in the history of the Astral Alliance as a hero… or a traitor in Captain’s Log - Space Adventure (CScript).

In Time Fall (CScript) — Time does not wait for anyone, even for the one that controls it. Life in the undercity of Draeken, also known as The Depths, is brutal enough. But when an ill-fated encounter leaves you forever altered—your blood itself changed—you’ll soon realize that time is strange, and the thin fabric of reality a fickle thing. Even more so when it’s something you can no longer just witness … but may be forced to control.

Until the Dogs Come Home (CScript) is about war, though you play no part in it. Instead, you are the sole member of your hometown’s postal service, who must venture into fire and brimstone to bring the word of loved ones to the front lines. As the battle rages on and new truths come to light, your seemingly simple job transforms into a rescue mission, where the very lives of the people you were tasked to deliver to are in your hands.

In Velocity's Edge (Twine) as the adrenaline-soaked story unfolds, secrets are unveiled, loyalties are tested, and the pursuit of the checkered flag takes on a life of its own, propelling the characters toward the finish line which is only the beginning of the ultimate race. @velocitysedge-if

In the summer of 1984 you get a letter informing you of your mother's death. The first and only letter you get in ten years since you left your hometown. You stand in the middle of the old, tiny room that you can barely afford to rent and read it over and over again until the buzz at the back of your head quiets down. - There Are No People Left (Twine)

In Bride of Shadows (Twine) step into the tragic and fleeting existence of a Vestal of Dawn—a priestess bound by sacred vows of purity and an unwavering devotion to scripture. But when the sun goddess abandons you, your faith shatters. In your darkest moment, a tempting offer arises. A new covenant. A second chance at life... but at a cost. @bride-of-shadows-if

In Lecture Me Later (Unity) you wake up in a classroom way after your lecture concludes. The person who wakes you up looks familiar. Oh right, it's that one popular guy that everyone likes. With the light of the setting sun on your skin, you engage in conversation with the popular young man, realizing that things are taking a very scandalous turn, and that his interests are far more fascinating than you'd think. @lehxra-arts

~ UPDATES ~

A Shriek of Ash and Fire (CScript) added new content to their demo. @krogpile

Eldritch Tales: Inheritance (CScript) released second portion of Chapter 3. @darielivalyen

Keeper of Life and Death (CSscript) added new content to their demo. @keeperofthesunandmoon

Lightweaver: Chosen (CSscript) updated their demo. @lightweaver-chosen-if

My One and Only (CSscript) added new content to their demo. @reds-corner

Strings of Fate: Origins (CScript) released full Chapter 3.

The Eternal Library (CScript) updated their demo. @leiatalon

The Ultimate Magic Student (CScript) added new content to their demo

Thicker Than (CScript) updated their demo. @barbwritesstuff

Throne of Blood (CScript) released Zero and Cy’s aftermath Chapters. @throneofblood-if

Tri City Monsters (Ren’Py) released Akello Chapter 4. @tricitymonsters

Weeping Gods (CScript) updated their demo. @jcollinswrites

When Life Gives You Lemons (CScript) added new content to their demo. @when-life-gives-you-lemons-if

Chop Shop (CScript) released Episode 4. @losergames

Help! I Got Isekaied as a Lamia (CScript) added new content to the demo @succubus-interactivefiction

Marry My Stalker released Chapter 1.

The King's Hound (Twine) released the second half of Chapter 2. @the-kingshound

Hybrid (Twine) added new content to their demo. @heart-forge

~ OTHER ~

Mathbrush released Learning from the Best of Text [IF History Book], a collection of various historical essays about the history of interactive fiction as told through the lens of IFComp, the XYZZY Awards, and Spring Thing. (We thank Anon for bringing our attention to this release.)

When Winter Comes Again (Definitive Edition) (Ren’Py) is the fully remastered version of the romance visual novel originally released for mobile devices. Now available on PC, this edition brings an enhanced experience with improved visuals, and refined storytelling.

To Ashes You Shall Return (CScript) is looking for beta testers!

Sanguine Sky: Winter Special Collection of the short stories is out! @sanguinesky-if

let’s TEST IF#2: playtesting your game is also out! @golmac

As you might have heard, Dashingdon, a free ChoiceScript game hosting service, will be shutting down at the end of the month. All users and games will be permanently deleted. (Read more here)

If you know about a project that’s moving to an alternative hosting service, please consider updating the link in our Database. Our Team will be working on this in the upcoming weeks, but any help would be appreciated.

As always, we apologize in advance for missing any update or release from the past week. We are only volunteers using their limited free time to find as much as we can - but sometimes things pass through the cracks. If you think something should have been included in this week's zine but did not appear, please shoot us a message! We'll do our best to add it next week! And if you know oncoming news, add it here!

~ MAYBE YOU NEXT? ~

We did not get a submission this week. But if you have an idea for a short essay, or would like a special space to share your thoughts about IF and the community...

Shoot us an email!

~ HIGHLIGHT ON ~

A couple of games that we thought were cool.

Velocity's Edge by Amelia (Twine).

It's the first F1 based interactive fiction I've seen! Its very unique!

//submitted by anon//

Your favourite game here?

Do you have a favourite game that deserves some highlighting?

An old or recent game that wowed you so much you spam it to everyone?

Tell us about it! And it might appear here!

WE LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL! WHETHER IT'S GOOD OR BAD, OR EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN...

Have something to say? Send us a message titled: Zine Letter!

As we end this issue, we would like to thank:

our anons

For sending us a Highlight and news!!

And as always, huge thanks to all you readers who liked, shared, and commented on last week's issue! What might be tiny actions are huge support and motivators to us!

Thank you for cheering us on this journey!

See you in two weeks!

BEX, DION, BRIAR AND PETER

WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2025-ISSUE 2

THIS ZINE ONLY HAPPENS WITH YOU!

Want to write 1-2 pages about a neat topic, or deep-dive into a game and review it in details? Share personal experiences or get all academic?

WRITE FOR THE COLUMN!

Prefer to be more low-key but still have something to share? Send us a Zine Letter or share a game title for Highlight on…!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!

Came across something interesting? Know a release or an update announced? Saw an event happening? Whether it's a game, an article, a podcast… Add any IF-related content to our mini-database!

EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS!

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distantlaughter · 27 days ago

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Nico at the NDR Talk Show on 31st Jan 2025 in Hamburg

IMAGO Images / Michael Wigglesworth

#nico rosberg #media

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aylinisobel-week · 3 months ago

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Hello, everyone! Now that the interest check poll is closed, I am pleased to announce the dates for the Aylin/Isobel fanweek: January 27th to February 2nd, 2025.

Fanfiction, fanart, fanmixes, meta, edits, and all other forms of participation are welcome, as are NSFW works.

Please post your works, or links to externally hosted works, here on tumblr and tag them with #aylinisobelweek2025 for visibility. This blog will be reblogging and collecting all of them.

In order to give you as much time as possible to get ready and decide what you'd like to do, here are the themes and prompts for all 7 days of the event. The first list is a set of canon-referencing daily themes, while the other gives you four words a day to serve as inspiration. Feel free to mix and match as you see fit, and use the prompts in whatever way suits you best. Have fun!

Jan 27th, Day 1 Moonrise over Reithwin Mundane, formal, ritual, promise

Jan 28th, Day 2 A century of sorrow Vengeance, service, devotion, protection

Jan 29th, Day 3 The Moonmaiden's silver light Tides, cycles, healing, scars

Jan 30th, Day 4 Returned to the fold of time Hero worship, smitten, argument, anger

Jan 31st, Day 5 What could have been/in another life/AU Reunion, skills, training, bath

Feb 1st, Day 6 The task of steadfast faith Community, holiday, prayer, friends

Feb 2nd, Day 7 The road to Baldur's Gate - and beyond Courtship, romance, letters, bloodline

---

That's it for now! You'll hear from me again as the event itself draws closer. For questions and comments, contact me at @oathkeeper-of-tarth or here.

#dame aylin #isobel thorm #aylin x isobel #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #aylinisobelweek2025 #fan week #fan event #prompt list

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dreamsofbroflovski · 2 months ago

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yo…hear me out..

what the main four or others (as long as kyles in it..) are like for new years celebrations!

happy 2025 yall. let’s cook.

oh look its kyle bufflobster on that gif. my personal enemy.

Happy 2025!!! Hope everyone's having a great time already! As for me, I managed to drink cider that's been expired since 2021. It's going swell.

My first request for headcanons! I don't even know if I did these right, but I really did rack my brain. I also added some words about how they'd be with the reader because why not.

MAIN FOUR HEADCANONS - NEW YEAR'S CELEBRATIONS

𓆩♡𓆪 STAN MARSH

First thing that needs to be said: this man is pissed off days in advance over fireworks - if he has any pets, he has to make absolutely sure they’re safe and secure before anything else. He’s that guy who’s very vocal about how bad they are for animals (doesn’t really mention their effects on people), has probably tried to get them banned completely at some point.

Now that that’s out of the way. I think he’s the type to stay holed up in his home, order takeout and treat it as just another evening.

With the exception that he’ll have an excuse to drink a whole lot of cheap champagne without anyone being up his ass about it.

Avoids his family altogether, mostly due to his father wanting to go absolutely wild on the holiday, he needs to be far away from all that.

He’s not opposed to attending a party and being around his friends, but will not actively seek that out.

And if he’s partying, he’s gonna go blackout drunk and probably miss the actual turn of the year - only to try and drunkenly state his well wishes (or personal grievances) to everyone half an hour later when the whole thing has pretty much died down.

Thumbs up reacts to everyone’s texts on the afternoon of Jan 1st; no real response.

No resolutions at all. There’s no point - at the end of the day, the new year is just a continuation of everything that has been going on in his life. If he has to achieve anything, he’ll do so of his own accord, making a promise is just putting unnecessary weight on his own shoulders.

If he’s with you, however… He can be a little better and put more effort into it, because he sees how excited you are and doesn’t wanna burst your bubble.

Will do whatever you wanna do, but has a high preference for it just being the two of you somewhere isolated, with some food and music and the aforementioned champagne (which he drinks a lot less of if you’re present)

Will pull you into a kiss right as the fireworks start and try to keep you distracted for the duration, both because he wants to be as close to you as possible in that moment and also so that he can ignore the things entirely.

Will tell you all about how he loves you and how you’re the best thing that’s happened to him. Even if he sounds drunk, you know he means all of it entirely.

𓆩♡𓆪 KYLE BROFLOVSKI

He’s probably nothing special on NYE. Probably also stays at home, but not isolated.

Jewish New Year isn’t on Dec 31st, but I still think his parents do a little something, like some nice dinner or a reunion with extended family members or friends.

If he finds himself at some party, he’s pretty well-behaved even there. I don’t see him raising hell - however, if anyone stresses him out, he’ll fight like it’s any other old day.

Is the one fucker who brought the expensive champagne that no one can recognize the name of - which got the same treatment as the other cheap ones from the supermarket.

I do unfortunately see him in the position of designated driver. Someone has to make sure his dumbass friends don’t kill themselves on the road. That doesn’t mean he’s ever happy about it, though.

Watches people partake in superstitions, but doesn’t do any of them himself.

Sends ‘Happy New Year’ texts to almost everyone he knows as soon as midnight rolls over.

Makes resolutions and sticks to them - writes them, pins them to the wall, the whole nine yards. Morning of Jan 1st he’s already making detailed plans about how he’s going to achieve everything he said he would that year (whether those plans actually succeed is a whole different animal)

If he’s with you… He absolutely tries to make it a special night, despite it meaning little to him in a superstitious sense.

He’s also in the position where your plans are his plans, he’ll follow you. However, if you do accept to spend NYE with his family and him the whole time, it sends his heart soaring because he knows that you’re choosing him above all the other stuff you could be doing, and he’ll make sure you have a great time even if his family is… difficult.

Brings you into a soft and tender kiss as the new year rolls over, holding you close as you both share a toast of champagne and sort of ignore the first fireworks in favor of being with each other.

At the top of his resolution list is the mission to make your year the best it can possibly be, and to love you through all of it. He hasn’t really written that down on his list, though - because it’s on his mind 24/7 anyway.

𓆩♡𓆪 ERIC CARTMAN

Leaves his mother alone - he’s at a party somewhere, for sure. Even if he was invited to none, he’ll sneak his way in. Since no one really has it in them to argue with him on NYE, he gets to stay.

Which shouldn’t even be a bad thing, because he actually brings the heat; he shows up with several beverages and food every time. The part of it that sucks is the fact that everything he brings is for his consumption, so he’s still an expense to the host.

He can, however, legitimately be trusted with the aux. Actual decent taste when it comes to party music.

That one guy making jokes about how he ‘hasn’t showered since last year’ or shit. Except he says them at 10pm still on Dec 31st and no one’s sure if he’s just stupid or if it’s really true.

Wears party accessories ironically; possibly brought them.

Buys whole boxes of fireworks. He’ll try to find some poor soul to do the work of lighting them up for him, but normally can’t, so he does it himself and probably needs to be taken to the hospital from the burns or sets fire to something else entirely.

Makes posts and stories on social media wishing a half-assed Happy New Year to ‘everyone’ - when in reality he got maybe like, two texts at most. (Butters and his mom, most likely)

Strangely superstitious? People will see him go through all the possible traditions that anyone said would bring him good fortune. If anyone asks him about it, he’ll deny deny deny - actually, he’s wearing full white ‘because it’s drip’ and eating those grapes under the table ‘because he doesn’t want to share them’, it’s definitely not that he fears for his own luck if he doesn’t do so.

Since he is a little ‘stitious, that does mean he makes resolutions. And they’re usually grandiose, full of bullshit, and don’t really signify any relevant positive change for his life - it’s mostly just material and physical gratification. Needless to say, they’ve never come to fruition.

If he’s with you, barely anything changes, really.

Talks to you about his plans for the evening as if they’re a done deal. Basically drags you to whatever it is he wants to do. (You might even be the reason he’s able to get into a party to begin with)

Doesn’t kiss you straight away because he’s busy with his fireworks, but if he manages to not hurt himself, you get a heavy makeout session afterwards.

He talks mad shit about how you’re lucky to have him and how you should thank him for spending this time with you, but in reality, there’s nowhere else he’d rather be.

Immensely grateful for your presence in his life and willing to do anything to keep it that way. However, you won’t hear a single word about it.

𓆩♡𓆪 KENNY MCCORMICK

Out of his house by sundown - the addicts around him don’t really need a special occasion for doing their shit and stirring trouble, but it still seems to worsen on the holidays, so he wants to avoid that.

The protection Stan feels towards animals, he feels towards his siblings. Before he goes do anything else, he has to make sure they’re accounted for, with their friends somewhere safe where they can enjoy the night.

When that’s dealt with, it’s party time. He does get invited to stuff, and tries his best to not show up empty-handed, even if it’s just a bottle of cheap alcohol. He might still fail in that regard, though, but it’s okay, we still love him.

Wears all the ridiculous party accessories unironically.

Has died, more than once, due to firework-related accidents. Still enjoys watching them, albeit from a very safe distance now.

Watches the ball drop livestream on the television with great interest, even if just because it’s in HD this time. Celebrates heavily when it finally happens.

His ‘Happy New Year’ texts come in the afternoon, because he’s always too wasted in the morning to tell anyone anything. People might receive a drunken nonsensical jumble of letters at midnight, though.

Says surface-level words about a resolution or two, but it’s mostly really simple stuff. Also doesn’t really hold any of that to heart, because he knows of his own bad luck.

Doing the absolute most for a new year’s kiss (or several), practically on his knees begging for it.

However, if he’s with you… You’re getting way more than a kiss. It doesn’t even matter where y’all are, he’s starting the year by doing his favorite thing with his favorite person.

He kinda drags you into his plans, but it’s not in a selfish way like Cartman does. He just wants to make sure the both of you have a great time.

If you turn out to invite him personally to spend time with your family or just yourself, words cannot describe how happy he’s gonna be. It’ll basically make his whole year. He’ll ditch any party for that.

Partying all night with his baby, watching the fireworks, making love and not having to worry about anything else? Count this dude in.

Dividers by @cafekitsune

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anhanezine · 2 months ago

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🎧 Preorders Open! 🐹

Preorders are now officially open until Jan 31st, 2025! Please take a look at our bundles! ✨️

Shop open worldwide!* https://anhanezine.bigcartel.com

*We are unable to ship to the EU due to GPSR policies. However, you can look into our digital zine bundle!

The first 20 orders can use code "VIVIDS" for 15% off!

All bundles are PREORDERS! We will begin production after preorders close. We will ship all orders (including digital bundles) after production is complete!

Production can take around 1-3 months, if not longer, should unforseen circumstances arise. Follow us here for updates!

Please see next post for information on our stretch goals!

The Everyday With You team is so excited to share everyone's hard work and love for An and Kohane! We thank everyone for your continued support! 🎧🐹

#an shiraishi #anhane #kohane azusawa #project sekai #vivids #anhane zine

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soundlesswind · 2 months ago

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🎀 Pikko x Bun with COPICs 🎀

These markers were one of my first loves. If you ever wanted to try out COPIC markers, now's a great time. Until Jan 17, COPIC has a promotion where you can get your first marker for only $1 (shipping included!) over at their official TRY COPICS page.

Or if you're already a fan and need to top up a set, you can Save 25% off your order with code HOLLEE25 (valid until Mar 31st).

It's quite a big discount, so save where you can. Personally, I love their liners, and would like to refresh a few. Maybe share the news with a friend you think might be interested?

Stay safe and healthy, and Happy New Years. Will definitely try to get back into traditionals in 2025. Cheers~

#art #pikkorin #1DollarCOPIC #copicwithus #copicacrea

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077gasoot · 2 months ago

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PREORDERS OPEN UNTIL JAN 31ST 2025

Ok i was so ill over them in the new movie i had to make charms of them. Theyre up on my kofi, leafpotion!

#agent stone #dr robotnik #stobotnik #sonic #sonic fanart #my art #fanart #077gasoot #charms #charm #keychain #keychains #acrylic charms

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hauntingsofafuturespast · 1 month ago

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Hopefully. ✌️

#Jan. 31st 2025

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cautionwetspiralstaircase · 1 month ago

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here's pili's end-of-stream rant from yesterday (right after killing ros for the second time) that i transcribed for fun earlier ^ ^ ft. him yelling at god (?) and freaking out about pangi

(source: Dtowngato 27/28 Jan 2025 PREPARING MYSELF TO FIGHT CLOWNPIERCE (im cooked) - Realms SMP ---- Main Account @/dtowncat, around 2h51min)

(CW suicidal ideation i guess)

Pili: I’m done. [Bad: Pili!] [laughing] I am done. I am done. I am done. I am so done. I- [laughs] I am so done! I can’t do this anymore. I- I can’t do this anymore. I am done. I am leaving this place. I’ll come back on the 31st, and you know what- you know what- maybe I do deserve dying, maybe I do deserve to get myself humiliated, [yelling] I am done! I am- [in a more normal voice, as he turns around and starts looting Ros’ drops] I- actually kinda need the armour, gimme a second. [laughs] Lemme- lemme- [in a loud voice] spare change... [stuttering] Spare- spare change... Spare- spare change- ooh, cobweb. Spare change... Spare change, anyone? Any- s- um. Um. Spare change... Um. [To BBH] Can you give Ros her tools? I’m just leaving this place. I am so- [Bad: Mm-hm] you know what, [laughing] I am so done. I am- [starts running out of spawn] I am so done! I’m leaving! I’m leaving! I’m leaving! I am so leaving. D- I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I am sick and tired of no one taking me seriously, I am sick and tired- I tell people things, they don’t understand, [laughing] they- don’t understand, I- am done. I’m done. I’m gonna leave Ros, one life, maybe she’ll start appreciating her life more. Maybe. Maybe- [indistinct noises]

[quietly] I’m done. I’m done. I’m so done. I’m so done. I’m- so actually done. [pause] [shoots a teleportation arrow] I’m so- you know what, I- I genuinely feel so bad about it- [falls from a height before getting teleported again] oh. Ouchie. [inhales] I genuinely- I genuinely- I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know. If I’m such a bother, if I’m such- an asshole that I’m gonna leave. Like no one ever wants me and I- I get why. I’m not playing victim here, I get why, but it’s just, I’m- I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I’m done. I’m done with this, I’m done with everyone, I’m- I’m- yknow what? [getting louder] I deserve this. And here’s the thing. [laughing] I’m not victimising myself, I’m a fucking asshole! And what?! I am! And what! I- This- is- literally happening, is gonna happen over and over and over again, and it’s just gonna get worse, it’s just gonna be worse than before, and I’m not gonna be able to stop it! I’m not gonna be able to stop myself! So I might as well just like actually leave. I might- I might actually just leave. I might actually- I’ll come back on the 31st, everyone fucking hates me probably. Everyone fucking hates me now. Like it’s done! It’s done! It’s not- there’s no coming back from this. There’s no coming- I- I do this to myself. Every single time. [hits the table] I deserve this. I deserve this. I deserve this. I deserve this. I deserve this. No, I deserve this. I- deserve this. I...

[inhales] I just- [pause] [laughs] I deserve this.

I actually deserve to die. [pause] You know- [pause] [laughing a little] when I get my fucking ass beat, I am so gonna enjoy every single second of it. When he makes me- actually fucking regret every single choice. I’m gonna be enjoying it so bad, cuz- I for sure deserve it now.

I’m just leaving. I’m- I’m- I’m just leaving.

I’m such a fucking coward. [inhale] I am such a fucking coward. [laughing] I am- I am such a fucking coward and I hate myself!! Oh my god! [inhale] Ever- [voice breaking, laughs again] Every single time! Dude. Oh my god! Every single time! I can never do it! I can- [frustrated yell]

Such a fucking- coward, dude. It’s crazy. Dude! It’s just- why do I keep killing- weak people?! Why?! I don’t understand! It’s actually a problem! Oh my god!

[yelling] Like- what am I supposed to do?! [frustrated noise] Like- they don’t even give a proper fight! Like- [pause] like- Tubbo died in two hits, Ros died earlier, Ros died now in two hits- like- I killed Piso for fuck’s sake! I killed Piso! It was Piso’s like first fucking day on the server in like a month. And I killed him! And I fucking killed him! I killed Fit! I- am the only person that I- really wanna fucking kill. I can’t! I literally can’t! I’m- [stuttering] always standing there like a stupid fucking idiot. I always stand there like a- stupid fucking idiot. And I’m [laughing] never- I-

[he walks past a skeleton horse trap and lightning strikes]

Oh. For fuck’s sake. [looks up at the sky] Can you please leave me alone for one damn time. I am. So done. I am so done. Like how much you want me to suffer, how much- how many times- how many times, cause you made me this way. You fucking made me this way and you know that I can’t stop, but you didn’t make me even strong enough- you didn’t have the fucking guts to make me strong enough, dude. That is- [frustrated noise] [inhale] I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I can’t. I need to- I need to take a chill pill. I- actually, hashtag chill pill. Cuz we are so chill. I am so chill I am so chill I am so chill I am so chill I- I am so nonchalant, I am so chill that if a fucking zombie just took- actually, no! Actually, you know what, maybe I don’t deserve to die in Clown’s hands! Maybe this entire time I don’t deserve it, cos I don’t feel like I’ve earned it. I am- I need to- I need to work harder, I need to train harder, I- [pause] I need- to work harder cause I- it’s so far not good enough. I have- [indistinctly] it’s so far not good enough, and I don’t know, I think this time I might take the L again [mumbling] I genuinely think this might be the one that I take the L. Yeah, I know, never gonna be good enough. [laughs] [inhales] My whole life is a joke! It’s actually baffling. [inhales] My whole life is a joke. [inhales] [quietly] Oh, no. Pangi’s so dead. Poor Pangi is so dead. [laughs] He’s so dead! [quietly] I- fucking killed him. Oh my god I’m so stupid, I’m so stupid I fucking killed him. Oh my god I fucking did it. [pause] Oh my god I fucking- dude. [exhales] It’s gonna happen again, it’s gonna happen again isn’t it, it’s gonna happen again! [inhales] It’s gonna happen again!! Ahh!! Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh- I wasn’t even thinking about him. Oh my god. I wasn’t even thinking! I wasn’t even thinking properly I wasn’t even thinking through! Oh my god I’m so stupid I’m so stupid I’m so stupid! I wasn’t even thinking through! Oh poor Pangi- ohh my god- [quieter] how many more times am I have to go through this, again- [laughs]. I- w- [frustrated noise] I genuinely wish that I never met him. I genuinely wish that I never met him. This is.

Oh my god... Ohh. That guy is gonna- [falls a short distance] oh my f- [inhales] that guy’s gonna kill himself, isn’t he. He’s gonna get himself killed, that’s crazy. [pause] [inhales and exhales, sounding like he’s almost crying] I can’t wait to be gone. I- you know what- [pause] there’s no. There’s no turning back. Things are done. I- am. Just gonna keep- going, til I die, and then- I’ll be in peace. [pause] I’ll- I’ll be in peace. [whispering] I’ll be in peace. I just have to die. I just have to die, maybe I’ll kill Clown in the attempt, but th- but then- but then what? [laughing] Then what?! I kill him once, he’s gonna wipe me off the server, he told me about this! [another noise] [inhales] Oh... He has four lives. He has four fucking lives, dude. Like even if I kill Clown, he’s just gonna come back and kill me again. And again. Until I’m dead, I’m gone.

[quieter, sounding tired] I’m just- you know what. I’m just gonna. I’m just gonna go. [inhales] I guess- I can at least try to kill him. [inhales] Maybe- cause I’m dying. That is a hundred percent real. I am so dying, and you know what? I- can’t wait for that to happen. But until then- I shall practise to at least- at least- um. [pause] Oh my god. I- I gotta at least kill him once, like- I could have some sort of legacy on me before I die, I cannot die like a fucking loser who killed people that had like- worse armour, worse stats, worse everything. [pause] I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna do it! I’m gonna do it. Non-stop training, for the next days, until the 31st, and I’m gonna kill Clownpierce, even if it’s the last thing I do before I’m dead, and I am gone forever. [laughing] I’m gonna do it! I am doing it!

#the realm smp #dtowncat #pili dtowncat #not expecting anyone to reblog this cause it's soo messy and i'm abusing the square brackets and hyphens so hard but #wooo that was a fun stream i mean fun VOD to watch #pili is the actual problematic fave right now i love everything he's doing especially when he absolutely shouldn't be doing it

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