#Jack speaks.

[vivalavillain]

{It's been 3 years to the day that I made this blog, or so Tumblr tells me. Some of you have been with me since my geneticist days, days before this blog even existed, and that means more to me than I can say. Had you asked me when I first made this blog what I saw myself doing with it three years later, I'd never have imagined all this and I couldn't be happier. Thank you to everyone who's stuck by me, who's written with me, who's inspired me to keep going just by showing interest. It means the world.}

[pebbledrat]

"stop posting butch and femme jack manifold"

no????

[uncharismatic-fauna]

Friendly reminder to everyone to always fact check your work. Even when it seems like it's right.

Case in point: I'm making a short little post about Gambian pouched rats(!). Funnily enough, they're named not for pouches in which they carry their young, but for their cheek pouches. Apparently most other rats don't have cheek pouches like hamsters and gerbils do. Neat.

Anyway, some of the literature I was reading said that Gambian pouched rats can carry a lot of food in their mouths. Makes sense-- they're big rats. But how much food exactly? I started looking. More sources agreed that, yeah, Gambian pouched rats can carry a lot of food! Maybe even up to 3kg over the course of 2 hours! That seems like a lot, especially considering Gambian pouched rats only weigh 1.0-1.5 kg. So I do a little more digging. Every source agrees that they can carry a lot, and they all cite that very specific number of 3kg over 2 hours.

Finally, I track down an actual paper about Gambian pouched rat cheek morphology (yes I went down a wormhole. This is my HBomberGuy moment.) The paper cites 2 sources for that 3 kg/2 hr number! Great! I find those two papers, and read them. And.

Neither paper says that. In fact, they don't really talk about Gambian pouched rat feeding habits at all. One is just an observation on natural behaviors, with a brief section on their diet but no information on how much they carry. The second paper-- written by the same guy-- was about how Gambian pouched rat behaviour changes in captivity. There was a good-sized section on cannibalism, but nothing on transporting food. So that first paper, the one that cited those other two for that 3 kg/2 hr figure, just straight up lied.

Moral of the story: always do your homework kids, especially when it sounds too good to be true. Also, Gambian pouched rats can probably carry quite a lot of food in their mouths, but whether they really can carry up to 3 kg worth of food in 2 hours remains to be seen.

[arcanejude]

at least he looked good

[kamiraaah]

EDIT: Based on your guy's reactions about the families 👁👄👁

[painless-innit-colourful]

longest one yet but guys I really think this one was worth the wait

[rewrittenwrongs]

AU where John Constantine is Janet’s (or Jack’s) ex and still semi-regularly gets calls from Tim or Janet about cursed artefacts they accidentally found and/or brought home. Each time Tim calls him over he ends up teaching him a little bit about how curses and enchantments work while he removes the effects of said curses and artefacts. Occasionally Tim will call him about non magic related problems, like his homework or how to cook breakfast when Ms Mac is sick. And one day he sees on the news that Jack and Janet Drake were poisoned overseas, that Janet was dead and Jack in a coma, and he hightails it to Gotham with no particular plan beyond swinging by the house to say hi to Tim and maybe visiting her grave. And the first thing Tim does upon seeing him is tackle him in a hug, before promptly asking if he can pretend to be his uncle.

Constantine realising BATMAN is the guy who keeps sending him passive aggressive looks and tried (unsuccessfully!!) to claim him unfit for childcare takes years off his lifespan.

[ohyoufool]

this fucking sucks I'm going to [remembers suicide jokes are bad for your mental health] reinvent myself on a college men's hockey team

[kermit-coded]

paula absolutely writes 100k jack manhattan x cosmo chase explicit fanfic on ao3. i know it.

[hinamie]

every so often i have to relearn how to draw yuuji or he starts fighting me

[vivalavillain]

{You lot would start IC Star Wars talk when I'm unable to access my desktop for the rest of the night.}

[luvlyycy]

he jacks off when you make him angry.

(link is audio porn, lmao, also disclaimer the last 30 sec kinda ooc but you can still be delulu if u want)

he rips his gloves off and unzips his pants when he's alone, hand immediately wrapping around his fat cock— thoughts of the argument you had earlier, causing him to squeeze harder and move faster. his moans are static-y due to his helmet, leaning against the wall, almost melting against it. "fuck- fuck— so,,, annoying." he breathes, thinking about the words you had yelled at him.

you said you hated him, he groans— eyes shut as he pictures you looking up at him with tears in your eyes due to anger.

you spat curses at him, saying he was impatient, he was ungrateful, that he's an asshole. he lets out a soft chuckle, buckles on his pants clanking together as he rests his palm his chest— grunting as he continously pumps his cock, attempting to rub his own chest the way you would, forgetting his armor was in the way. "ohhh fuckkkk," he murmurs your name when he feels himself about to cum, "i'm close baby, fuck. g'nna cum s'much for you, bitch. ugh, fuck!—" he grunts loudly, before letting out soft whimpers then swallowing them.

cum shoots from the tip of his cock, landing on the wall and seeping into his pants. he bucks into his hand as he cums, rubbing his helmet against the wall like some sort of animal. he's never came that fast. what is he? a hormonal teenager?

"fuck, i gotta apologize." he mumbles, the mere thought of sorry exiting his lips feeling as if a snake apologized to a mouse for eating it.

[divineandmajesticinone]

JACK & JOKER: U STEAL MY HEART! (2024) I EP. 10

[uncharismatic-fauna]

Surprise! Did you know some toads glow under UV lignt? I sure didn't! This is a Couch's spadefoot toad (Scaphiopud couchii) showing off this fantastic ability.

[thisdudedoesntexist]

Danny has a problem.

It's been around two weeks after fighting vlad and removing his powers, the tension has been building between them for a long time.

First it was the crown, Danny had earned it after fighting Pariah but Vlad thinks that Danny isn't ruthless enough to rule saying that he's "too soft" and "too indecisive" to wear the (for all the title of Ghost King is worth) glorified funny hat. Then after a long time of arguing between them Vlad came up with a scheme. If he couldn't become the king he would become the regent, he just needed to possess Jack Fenton, have him divorce Vlad's "beloved" Madeline and then possess her into marrying him.

As you can guess this didn't work, Danny found him about two seconds after he tried to divorce Maddy cause he wasn't even trying to act (like a human sized Golden retriever) his dad. So he and mom beat the creepy incel out of his dad, in the process Danny was forced to transform and his parents accepted him (YAY!), he also got hit in the side of his head by Vlad, damaging his Broca's area just enough so he can only speak in Ghostspeak, but he can still understand human words and letters. After that mess they moved to Gotham so he could recover in a place with high ectoplasm without Vlad harassing them. ( Lady Gotham hates Vlad.)

Now you're probably wondering, "What's the problem, Vlad is out of the picture and your parents accept your half dead-ness."

The problem is that some guy dressed as a scarecrow released some weird gas into his school. He didn't get a lot of people cause the "Bats?" Showed up but his friend Damien got sprayed and ran off saying he was gonna kill his brother tim. So in Danny's infinite genius he ran off after him to make sure he doesn't hurt someone.

He's not sure why Damien speaks Ghostspeak though.

[86espresso]

oh my GOd. take it away

MAKE IT STOP