#Ive made one of every race for fun

[xpiester333x]

"We should play Baldur's Gate together."

Say less, I've made characters.

[skitskatdacat63]

2009 European Grand Prix - Rubens Barrichello(ft. Lewis Hamilton & Kimi Räikönnen)

[hand-face-chan]

Uhhhhhhhh..... I have some........ thoughts.

Whoops! Sorry everyone!

the thomas thorne affair is clearly better than redding weddy. this is not a judgement on redding weddy but the thomas thorne affair is the third-best episode of the show and redding weddy is not

[moonshynecybin]

if you have the time or inclination, can i ask what the deal with motogp/those boys is about? i don’t mean that in a mean way btw, im just curious and i love drama

i will try to be brief (1/4358)

SO! valentino rossi (born 16 February 1979, aquarius. italian.) is one of the most iconic people in motorsport, CERTAINLY in motogp. he's a 9 time world champion, your favorite driver's favorite driver, and is generally credited with revolutionizing the popularity of the sport by: a. being insanely good at motorcycle racing, and b. in general having a lot of fun about it. lethally charming and charismatic. all time active listening face. just a fun and funny dude that everyone pretty much likes and MANY younger riders idolize. VERY good at handling the media and his legions of cult-like fans. sometimes treated more like a god than a person. i was in the store yesterday and saw one of his themed monster energy drinks despite him retiring two years ago. his fun retirement activity is racing BMWs and running his own motogp team/training facility/cult for young italian racers. (this is where cele and bezz and basically every italian rider not named enea bastianini come from!)

so in 2011ish valentino had won 9 titles, and he decided to leave his current manufacturer and move to italian manufacturer ducati where he generally had a stone-cold terrible time. EXTENDED flop era for a couple years. any time ive watched content that covers this period everyone is so sad. so sad. anyways he GOES BACK to his old manufacturer in 2013 and is much more competitive. kind of just happy to be winning sometimes and be on the podium. 2013 is also where marc comes in. what could go wrong.

marc marquez! (born 17 february 1993, almost exactly 14 years after vale which i'm sure means nothing. also an aquarius. spanish.) childhood sports idols include: dani pedrosa, VALENTINO ROSSI.

marc carved his way up through the feeder championships until casey stoner unexpectedly retired at the end of the 2012 season leaving a seat empty on a VERY good bike for his rookie season. rocked up and was immediately VERY good at winning and very good at being a crazyinsane person on track that made people mad at him lol. hilarious habit of pissing people off via on-track crimes that i really enjoy. motogp riders are already crazy (they do death sport) but marc is famous for taking risks no one else will. basically if he's not winning, he's crashed out or he's maybe crashed YOU out. he wins the championship as a rookie (insane) and the next year's championship as well. heir apparent to the throne. sweet and goofy but is now known as one of the more reserved riders with the press. probably because of all this drama tbh. undisputed GOAT of acting like a slut on camera

throughout 2013-2014, marc and valentino had a good relationship! marc very clearly idolizes him and is like. bowled over completely with delight every time valentino looks his way. vale likes him! theyre buds! truly an endless well of pictures of vale explaining something with his hands and marc babygirling at him. highly recommend checking out @pgaslys every rosquez podium tag for contextual brain damage. insane times.

(IT SHOULD BE NOTED: before the 2015 season marc visits valentino at his practice track in italy, where they compete to break the track record and almost kill each other bc they are so pathologically competitive. APPARENTLY, marc showed up with some official mechanics and valentino was a little pissed off because it was supposed to be a like. fun thing. and to marc winning is the most fun! if you dont come to win why come at all! anyways marc breaks the track record and credits that to cooling their relationship a bit. good post about it here.) here they are that day:

so what could go wrong, right? WELL. valentino has a chance to win his tenth title in 2015. marc is on a flop bike and crashed a bunch so he's not in the championship conversation but vale is leading the standings from the jump, with his main opponent being jorge lorenzo. i think he really wanted that tenth, and dedicated himself to the season in a way he hadnt really ever before (he was a very effortless competitor when he was young. gym-adverse. king).

marc and him start to get into some scraps along the way, notably in argentina (where they made contact and marc crashed out), assen (where they made contact AGAIN and vale won the race), and phillip island (marc won. GREAT race available here for free). phillip island sees vale finishing P4 and jorge lorenzo finishing ahead of him in P3, reducing his championship lead by quite a bit. no real indication of any tension during these races, and they are asked about it!

this is where valentino's delulu era begins! basically, ahead of the next race (🔥🔥SEPANG 2015🔥🔥) in the pre-race press conference, he goes after marc, saying he was deliberately sabotaging valentino in phillip island because marc wanted jorge to win. in valentino's mind. marc wants jorge to win because a. they are both spanish (??) and b. it would mean marc has to win less titles to equal valentino's total. record scratch. freeze frame.

everyone (including marc!) thinks valentino is joking at first bc that is bananascrazyinsane. he was not joking. (it should be noted valentino STILL thinks this lol.) anyways marc is completely blindsided. he thought they were good! yeah they've been chippy on track but that's racing!! truly like. 22 years old and your friend (AND CHILDHOOD IDOL.) is calling you a snake in front of your face with NO prior warning to the entire motogp establishment writ large including your coworkers and REPORTERS. valentino wont even look at him the entire time. the press conference is available here on vimeo. excruciating gifsets of marc's very stiff bewildered PR smile found here.

anyways so. the race. marc is uh. pissed off. he's stuck to valentino like GLUE the entire time and they trade places a bunch of times. now marc is kind of famous for being a little asshole on track anyways, but its not like he's gonna get out of valentino's way and just let him pass after what he said in that press conference so. hand in unlovable hand <3. truly very fun to watch imo even with the sword of damocles hanging over them. marc is fucking on one the entire race and basically refuses to give valentino an inch until vale gets so fed up with his antics that um. well. it certainly looks like he kicked him. vale says he didnt, and that his leg accidently made contact with marc's bike. marcs says. he fucking kicked me. judge for yourself here!

so valentino gets hauled in front of race direction and penalized for the next race (the deciding race for the championship). he has to start from the back of the grid and it kills his chance at a tenth title stone dead. vale places the blame squarely on marc's shoulders and his legions of fans decide marc is public enemy number 1. him and jorge have to get security at the next race because of death threats, someone tries to break into marc's childhood home back in spain, marc's mom throws away all of marc's valentino merchandise from when he was a kid. vale says nothing.

but the thing about marc. is that he loves very hard and chooses his people pretty carefully. didnt really move out of his tiny hometown until he turned 30 and also made his baby brother move in with him kind of guy. so all this is not really enough for him to let go of vale entirely! 2016 is where the pain lives! bc marc is still reaching out and vale himself stays pretty cold for a couple years. they seem to faintly reconcile for a bit but its not anywhere like it was before sepang.

the real nail in the coffin is argentina 2018. another insane race where marc has to start from the back and goes on a rampage through the field and crashes out like three people. i cant remember. this race is also available on youtube for free its very entertaining. every five minutes marc does something insane. vale is one of the people marc crashes out and afterwardshe goes on a big rant about how marc is destroying the sport and is actively dangerous. marc goes to valentino's garage immediately after the race to apologize and vale doesnt even look at him. he gets turned away at the door after vale's best friend/assistant/henchman yells in his face1!!! and thats kind off all she wrote in terms of reconciliation

anyways that's where we are! they are both very much not over it. vale goes on podcasts and is like. in 30 years i will still be mad, im literally never going to get over it it was such a big and unfair thing and i think about it all the time like it was yesterday. and marc (lying) says as time goes by i dont even think about it :) and i care about valentino less and less :))) but yes he hurt me deeply lol. CANNOT stress enough how much this entire thing is now inextricably liked to both of their legacies. the two arguable GOATs of a sport had an epic fleetwood mac-style beatles breakup divorce and everyone wants to talk about it allllll day long including me :)

additional context! really recommend checking out marc's little docuseries he put out this year about his recent struggles with injury. he is so not right in the head and it goes over the valentino drama in ep3. theres also hitting the apex (2015) which goes over the 2013 season (marc's rookie season) and is a really good introduction to all the major players at the time. its like less than 2 hrs long so its not too much of a commitment

also recommend following scholars @babynflames, @its-always-silly-season, @baking-soda, and @f1vegas as well as many others im forgetting rn bc its 2am!

[harryslittlefreakk]

bite me

welcome to the first post of fictober 🍁🎃 this month will be all about witchy, spooky, cozy blurbs - enjoy!!!

summary: vamprry realises that halloween means he can mark his girl without anyone suspecting a thing 🧛

warnings: violence (i guess? biting), mentions of blood, hints of smut

wordcount: 1.1k

a/n: this was SO FUN to write!! ive never played around with the spooky/supernatural in writing so please let me know how i did!

fictober masterlist | main masterlist

“My sweet girl.”

You turned at the sound of Harry’s voice, the low rumble starting a fire in your core. You knew what you’d see when your eyes met his.

The room was dimly lit, the moon casting silver beams across his face as you backed into the wall in front of him. His veins pulsed against the gentle skin of his neck, his eyes dark and glimmering with a blood-red shine.

His nose twitched as he looked at you hungrily, his body edging towards you as though your scent was physically drawing him in.

You studied him for a moment, your heart racing as he stared back at you. Your hand reached out to take his, your touch hesitant as his fingers gripped your hand with an unrelenting force.

“Let me in, Harry,” you whispered, sucking in a deep breath as you waited for his movement.

He’d let you in before, entwining your minds until you saw the world from his eyes, experienced yourself through his body. It was the only way you could see his reality, and you loved it.

To loom over yourself in bed, feeling the arousal that you caused flooding through his body, feel the pleasure of you both as he fucked you, coming together as one joint entity.

To hear the blood pounding in his ears, his heart hammering and pulse racing as he sunk his teeth into the neck of someone who’d never know how intimately they were handled by him.

Your chest grew tight, your lungs feeling as though they were crumpling in the depths your chest - and then you were standing a foot away, watching yourself hold the hand of the body you were in.

Your scent was intoxicating, more potent than ever. Harry’s throat burned, the familiar ache that came when he hadn’t fed for too long. He tried to focus on your voice, the softness of whatever you were saying, but every word seemed distant, blurred by the pounding of his heartbeat.

You raised a hand to your - his - throat as he swallowed hard, his jaw tightening. The hunger, the need was clawing at him, consuming him. He loved you, more than anything, and he’d promised himself he would never hurt you. But right now, all he wanted was to taste you.

“We have the party tonight,” you murmured, your voice coming from somewhere close and yet so far away. Your lips didn’t move, but the girl in front of you was speaking with your voice. “And neither of us have costumes. You could go as a vampire,” the mouth in front of you was morphing into a mischievous smile. “And I could go as your victim.”

Harry’s heart raced, a mix of shock, desire, and fear coursing through him as your words sunk in. He hadn’t ever expected you to offer yourself up as his prey. The thought of feeding on you, of sinking his fangs into you soft skin, terrified him - but it also excited him, in a way that made his entire body ache.

“I don’t want to lose control,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “I don’t want to risk it.”

Your blood was hot through your body, your core tight as you felt Harry’s brain ticking through the emotions. He was hungry, so hungry, so fuelled by desire that though he voiced them, he was barely even considering the implications.

He dropped your hand, and you found yourself back inside your own mind, shut out from Harry’s body. He didn’t want you to feel whatever he did. The adrenaline pumped through you, bouncing between every wall and surface under your skin. It was an arousal stronger than you’d ever felt before, a desire that coursed through you with an intensity that made you ache.

You moved closer, your breath warm on his cheek. “I trust you.”

His hands trembled as they cupped your face, staring into your eyes. Slowly, you tilted your head, exposing your neck to him, the pale skin beckoning, the rhythmic thrum of your pulse a siren’s call. He could feel the sharpness of his fangs, aching to break free, to taste the life that flowed through your veins.

For a moment, he hesitated, his instincts warring with his conscience. But then you whispered his name, soft and reassuring, and he couldn’t hold back any longer. With a gentle breath, he pressed his lips to your neck, his fangs piercing your skin in one swift, tender motion.

A sharp sting bloomed at the side of your neck, but it was quickly followed by a pulse of warmth, almost like the pain melted into something sweeter, deeper.

Your breath caught, chest tightening with the rush of adrenaline that surged through her veins. It was intoxicating - the heat of his breath on your neck, the way his body pressed close to yours. The initial shock of the bite quickly gave way to a strange, electric thrill, sending waves of tingling pleasure coursing down your spine. Your heartbeat pounded in your ears, fast and heavy, and each thud seemed to sync with the slow pull of blood leaving your body.

Your fingers curled into his shirt, gripping tightly, not out of fear, but out of the urge to be even closer to Harry. You weren’t afraid. The tiny niggling worry that the moment would terrify you, would transform your relationship into prey and predator, gave way to a pride that swelled in your chest. Pride that you could give him this, that you could be the one to quench the thirst that he had held back for so long.

Your body buzzed with the sensation, a soft warmth spreading through your limbs as Harry fed. Each pull of his mouth felt rhythmic, like a connection beyond words. Your vision blurred slightly at the edges, a soft dizziness creeping in, heightening your other senses as. You were more aware of the closeness between your bodies, of the way he trembled slightly as he fought for control.

The faint tug of Harry’s lips against your neck slowed, his tender kisses replacing his teeth, and as he finally pulled away, you exhaled a breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding.

You were light, your mind slipping into a strange, euphoric haze as the adrenaline mingled with your desire. A gentle exhaustion washed over you, but your heart beat steady and strong. You tilted your head slightly, catching his gaze as he looked at you, concern and affection in his eyes.

“I’m okay,” you whispered, your voice breathy but sure. Harry pulled you close, your head buried in his chest, his heart still pounding steadily. His thumb grazed over the bite, the blood already starting to dry onto your skin, his chin still warm with the last drops.

“That’s one hell of a Halloween costume,” he whispered, a gentle laugh lacing his words.

omg so fun!!!!

taglist: @angeldavis777 @softestqueeen @jerseygirlinca @palmettogal508 @drewsephrry @austiebuttbutt @indigo24hughes @peterparkerbae @im-an-overthinker @daphnesutton @loveableidioticweirdo @tenaciousperfectionunknown @swag13r @ashleighsss @tswiftsgf @chesthairrry @nikkisimps @hannah9921 @lilfreakjez @prettygurl-2009 @s-h-e-l-b-e-e @indierockgirrl @cicicavill7 @cohnfusedarling @ell0ra-br3kk3r @stylesfever @stylesbrock @harry-nialllover @triski73 @meetmeintheemeraldpool @harryshousewitnessprotection @danaehldy @fairytale07 @storyschanging @wannaliveinparadise @mrs-anna-styles211994 @mema10 @fangirl509east @devilsqueen722

[tetsuswaifu]

Beach Day with the Boys (Haikyu! x Reader) - Pt. 1

⋆ ♱˙𓆩☠︎︎𓆪˙♱ ⋆ feat: Bokuto Kōtarō, Kuroo Tetsurō (early relationship for both)fluff

word count: 988

a/n: i love the beach so much and i love the idea of what it would be like to go with them, so i will be writing for more of the guys soon enough, lmk if you would like to be apart for the taglist also if you have submitted a request recently, i promise ill get to them, ive got some nonserious family stuff going on thank you for being so patient w me 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼

likes, reblogs, and replies are always appreciated, thank you for taking the time to read my work :)

・❥・Bokotu Kōtarō・❥・

You and Bokuto are early to arriving at the beach, being the first one's there. Both of you wanted to stake out the best spot so you could set up the volleyball net. Bokuto was very insistent on it being in the perfect spot, making sure it far enough from the water and designated the seating area of the group. His focus about the whole thing made you laugh, you had never seen him so serious before. The guy even brought a rake to keep the area clean of anything that could injure anyone.

Once everyone arrives and unpacks their belongings, he’s eager to start a game. He chooses you as his partner and you are ecstatic. Together you dominate the sandy court with a mix of your amazing serves and his powerful spikes. After every point made, Bokuto can’t help but cheer loudly in triumph. His excitement rubbing off on others, making everyone smile.

After claiming victory, Bokuto pulls you up onto his shoulders, parading around the beach while chanting, “We are the champions!” His enthusiasm so infectious that onlookers start to clap and cheer for you.

Not surprisingly, Bokuto still has a lot of energy after the intense game so he suggests going swimming. He races you to the water; he lets you get ahead, and before you know it, you're swept off your feet and gently tackled into the waves. You laugh as you splash each other playfully. He challenges you to various water games, like who can hold their breath the longest or swim the fastest. Despite his competitive nature, he has very good sportsmanship. He will always cheer for you, regardless of who wins.

After playing in the water, you decide you want to relax and tan, while Bokuto gets in another game of volleyball. With every move he makes, his chiseled muscles glisten in the sun. You'd watch him play all day if you could.

After his match, he joins you on a beach blanket, taking a break to enjoy some fruit and cold drinks. The small talk between the both of you is enjoyable, talking about anything and everything you could think of.

As the sunset approaches, all the boys take initiative to get the bonfire going. Each person takes a seat on the logs surrounding the fire, taking turns roasting hot dogs and marshmallows, sharing funny stories about each other. Bokuto's laughter was joyful and loud, you couldn't help but smile at the sound.

When stars began to show up in the night sky, Bokuto and you excuse yourselves to take a walk down the beach. He reaches over and intertwines his fingers with yours, “I’ve had such an amazing time with you, today. You make everything so much more fun.. and I, um,” he pauses, his hand squeezes yours, “… I think I’m falling for you.” “I think I am too, Kou,” you give him a firm kiss, more than a peck but not too intense.

After his confession, you both head back to your spot and lay down on a blanket, gazing up at the stars. He pulls you closer to him, releasing a sigh of contentment. He couldn’t be happier to be surrounded by you and his friends on this wonderful, beachy day.

・❥・Kuroo Tetsurō ・❥・

When you get to the beach, Kuroo is eager and extremely prepared to get everything set up. He’s got a big canopy to sit under, a foldable table for the food, those reclining camping chairs, he’s got everything. Kuroo even brought multiple outdoor games like badminton, ladder ball, spikeball, and cornhole. He is prepared.

This man is so ready for the beach that he even brought water balloons. You didn’t even see him packing them so you were surprised when he pulled out a cooler full of them. “No, you didn’t,” you smiled as you started to grab some and back away. “Yes, I did.” He and you ran around the beach laughing, trying your best to hit each other with the colorful balloons.

After you won the war, you both sat at the table under the canopy, fixing up a plate of premade sandwiches and snacks. As you ate, you two discussed what your plans after eating were, with random conversation mixed in.

Kuroo suggests going for a walk along the shore to collect seashells. You each find some unique shells but the majority are common. Kuroo playfully pretends to find a super unique one, only to reveal another one of the common shells. You roll your eyes but still laugh at his antics.

Later, you go and swim by yourself to cool off, while Kuroo prepares to prank you. He digs a shallow hole in the sand, covering it with a towel. He lures you over, suggesting to sit with him. When you step on the towel, you sink into the hole as Kuroo laughs. He quickly gets up to help you out and apologizes, a mischievous smile on his face.

When sunset comes, Kuroo is already on top of making the fire. You expected to have to scavenge the beach for wood but, again, that man is prepared. He brought a whole case of those premade firelogs so you wouldn’t have to worry.

Kuroo looks at you, his usual playful demeanor turning serious, his features softly lit by the fire. He takes your hand with his, “Y/N, I know I joke a lot, but I want you to know I really care about you. Today was amazing because I got to share the day with you.” He hesitates a moment before leaning over to give you a soft kiss

Night arrives with beautiful stars shining in the sky. You and Kuroo lie on a blanket, gazing up at the stars. Kuroo points at various star clusters, naming them and sharing facts about each one. His passion and knowledge for the subject captivated you. You admired the smarty-pants side of his personality.

[day-drawn-blog]

Part IV: There is more to do and I still want to live

Pairing: Astarion x Reader -- This is set in Act I

Part IV - LOTS of angst and sadness and jealousy and fluff.

Tags: angst, fluff, sadness, angst, fluff, then maybe eventually smut because I do love that

Part I. Crowned light moon of mine - I found you too soon

Part II : Lace your heart with mine Let your sleeping soul take flight

Part III : maybe tonight I'll rest in peace

Part V: our futures bound, our bodies known

Part VI : these ain't my sins, I' broke my chains

Part VII: You are not mine and am I truly yours?

Part VIII: your blood like wine, invites me in

Part IX: I'll welcome my sentence and give you my penance

Part X : I can't go yet...don't let me die

----------

The next morning you woke up. It took you a while to remember last night. You gasped and turned around. Your bed was empty. You were the only one. Your nocturnal visitor had vanished into the night air. Was he even there last night, or did you dream it all? Somewhere in the corner of your turbulent heart, you knew, he had gone back to his paramour. Which was not you. Before the pain of that thought drove you mad, you decided to distract yourself. After all, he never made any promises to you.

Time to get on with it.

The day was weary. You were finding it increasingly difficult to ignore the air between Shadowheart and Astarion. Every glance they shared, every smile was laced with poison for you. You prayed and hoped this would pass. You were the hero. You were the one who would lead them to safety, to the end of this perilous journey. It was a quest for salvation for all of you. And then you were all ambushed.

Time to focus on violence.

That should get your mind off of them. Except, Shadowheart was cornered, and while Astarion was supposed to target another, he defied the plan - to shoot at her attacker leaving himself open to a powerful spell that inflicted several wounds on him. He fell from his station. Drops of his blood splattered on Shadowheart's pale pretty face, down from where he stood.

Your heart had stopped.

Shadowheart shrieked, naturally to see him in pain so. Instantly she cast Santuary on him and incinerated the enemy with her radiance spell. You could feel her vengeance in the intensity with which she cast her spell. They then proceeded to embrace each other, her trying to heal him, and him finding solace in her arms.

You felt your world go blank.

Was there really a point to any of this? What was it, again. Your vision blurry, everything seemed to have slowed down. Or maybe just you. Karlach and Wyll were nearby. Flashes of spells and clash of swords. That's all you heard. Reckless abandon. That is what you wanted to feel. To make it worth something. To be seen, maybe. To be valued, to be needed. Or not be needed at all.

You cared not for your spell magic. It was time to feel the rage delivered through your own hands. Slashing, kicking, swinging your pact weapon. The feel of hitting a mortal enemy, splattering of blood around you. you could hear Karlach yell. Why? Oh, is that blood? Is that yours? Somebody bludgeoned you. Because being able to hit, meant being able to take a hit. Another punch to your face. This one you felt. You lost your footing.

This was fun.

Bring it on. See what I got. I will give it back to you. I have seen worse. I have felt worse. I have nothing more to lose. I will take you down with me. That's what raced through your mind. You hit harder, faster and with more venom than before. Killing with your own hands. You never enjoyed it before. Where is this rage coming from. You were no barbarian. You could feel the Hellish Rebuke coursing through your own body. you hit. And was hit back. Thrown back. Several times you landed on the floor. And got back up.

And then you felt hot. Warm. You had been hit with a fire spell.

You heard Wyll yell out. You could feel Karlach going into Rage. You knew the battle was won. You smiled, and you fell. For the last time that day. The last thing you remember seeing was Karlach cradling you, and Astarion running towards you from the distance. You couldn't make out what his face looked like. "Serves you right. Watch your only source of food disappear." you thought. You smiled, even if you were in pain.

The next thing you remember is Karlach nursing you in your tent.

Everything hurt. Pain all over. Wrapped in badages all over. You wondered what went down after your...recklessness. Karlach seemed really sad. Worried. "Thank the gods you are awake! What were you thinking?!" You smiled weakly. "Laezel has been going on and on about how impressed she was with your battle field prowess. "Ah.. Laezel, she would be...I'm glad".

After much fussing by Karlach, and Gale, and Shadowheart and basically everyone, who came to express their concern and relief or awe in your battle prowess or chastise you for your recklessness, you were relieved to get some quiet time. In which you wondered, where was the man, who mattered the most.

Typical. A vampire, only thinks of himself. and then suddenly, you remembered the look of pure horror on his face as you blacked out. But was he impressed? Was he worried? Did you get, ....his attention at last? You needed to know, if you were seen, at last.

If you mattered. To him. At all.

You decided to trudge outside in the cool night air. Everyone was finally asleep from all the exhaustion. It was a clear sky. Perhaps it is a great time to find a nice little piece of nature all to yourself. To take in the solitude.

You walked, slowly in the quiet night.

A little away from camp, you saw a shadowy figure. Almost predatory, walking towards you. Unmistakable.

So there he was.

He wasn't with shadowheart tonight? Maybe he had gone to hunt since, you weren't available. Your heart skipped a beat. There he was, out hunting. Was he scared he almost lost you? Was he finally worried about you? You wondered how the conversation would go. You had no idea why you did what you did, nor how he would react. You braced yourself.

But he said nothing at all.

He approached you. His face shone briefly in the moonlight. His eyes were cold. His shoulders brushed yours but he didn't stop. His glance was smouldering. Steely. But he said not a word and walked straight past.

You watched his back, through the light and darkness. Wait. You wanted to know, what he felt... "Are, you ... okay, Astarion? I saw you getting hurt earlier." Silence. Then he stopped and turned. You could hear your heart beat.

"Me? I am very glad to be alive you see. I do not want to just, end it all. Despite what my life has been so far, I still want to live." he looked at you with disdain.

You were taken aback.

You had been chastised by Wyll and to some extend Shadowheart, for your recklessness. But why did this one, cut through your heart?

"That's not... what I was ... "

But, is that what you were doing? Or is that what he thinks you were doing. Either way, you felt, ashamed. You would surely never. You had promised to be the Hero and Savior to others who needed saving. You wanted to love those that needed it. No. He was not right. It was not true. You won't let it be true.

You found your voice.

"Is that what you think I was doing? ha. I bet you got all worried, thinking your only source of higher blood would disappear. isn't it?" Your voice was laced with bitterness.

"And is that what you think of me?" His face was in the shadows. You could not see the glare in his eyes, but you could feel the disdain in his voice. "Well, in that case, maybe it is time for our nightly trysts to come to an end".

No. I didn't mean that.

You felt gripped by a sudden fear. No. Do not cast me aside. That is my only use to you. Do not take that away from me too. Please. That is not what I meant or wanted. That is the only time you look at me. You know of my existence. Only way I am needed by you. Only time I am wanted by you. No. You could feel tears choking you.

You couldn't speak. So he turned and resumed walking back to camp.

You turned too and then you broke down. You could not stop your tears. You felt so sorry. So very sorry for yourself. You almost lost yourself today, for this man. Why? Did you just want to be seen that badly. Only to be thrown away entirely. You watched the tears drop on your hands, and you knelt on the ground with your hands propping you up. Nothing you did would ever matter.

This was the bitter truth you so desperately wanted to deny. You never mattered to begin with. You were nobody to him. And you almost died for him. How could you hate yourself so much? Why would you not value yourself. Was he worth all that? You will never be Shadowheart. For it is she, who was in his heart and mind. You were just a convenient transaction.

You felt warm hands, from behind.

Hands that held you up. As you cried your eyes out. You were held in an tight embrace. As if the person wanted to take all your pain away. The harder your cried, the tighter you were embraced. You were found, by someone. Someone was there. Someone cared. That's all that mattered to you at that instant. You didn't care who it was. You were grateful it was...someone. You absorbed all the warmth in their body, and you felt the support of their broad chest against your back, as they buried their face in your neck from behind.

You felt his soft caress on your neck.

You felt so happy, that you started crying even more. You felt eternal bliss, you felt cared for, seen and you felt loved. You felt wanted. Your yearnings, came rushing out in salted tears. You wanted to laugh and smile, but you cried instead. Tears of joy, if only you could tell him that.

"I am sorry. I did not know. I am sorry. What can I do. How can I help you, please tell me a way." he whispered. "I cannot see you like this. I need you. Yes I need you. But not for your blood. You are our salvation. You protect us. From our personal demons. And in Wyll's case, quite literally".

You finally laughed a little.

He loosened his grasp a bit at that. Realizing, that the worst may have passed. but he did not let go entirely. Still resting his head next to you, kneeling on the ground with you, he held on. "I will one day, somehow, give you a reason to live on. Something you will want to hold on to. I promise you. Can't you wait a little bit. I don't know what that is yet. But you have my word".

Those were the last words you heard that night.

Because your pain and exhaustion and happiness came crashing on you at once. You felt your consciousness slip away. You felt swpt up, carried. You heard Karlach on the way. "What did you do to her Astarion! You better not have hurt her! she was already in bad shape. Did you make her cry?! Why are her eyes so swollen?" You drifted to a very sweet dream that night. Content somehow.

Part V: our futures bound, our bodies known

[i-rate-horse-games]

rating horse life for pc

this is the closest thing to a title screen i could find lol

the player character is shorter than the horse, i dont think ive ever had this pov looking up at a horse, it's scary, eyes right next to their teeth, short people are so brave, wow. this is my horse Ramune out at pasture.

she always has her ears back in the pasture and ignores me the first three times i call her but as soon as she comes over she seems happy? like she really hates socializing but is acting like she does to seem cool to her friends? i have no idea

this game is abandonware now and my copy of it seems to be poorly translated from french, so i'm not going to comment on the funny bits of dialogue, but the dialogue lines themselves were incredibly repetitive!

the game goes like this: you take care of your horse (feed, clean stall, sponge, or brush - not all at once though) which feels like it takes forever but might just be three minutes on average. you compete to win gold medals in show jumping, dressage, cross-country, and eventing.

jumping and cross-country both use the same jumping mechanic, where you change your speed between every jump to the one the game wants and then press the space bar when the ground in front of the jump turns green or white. dressage has you click the left and right mouse buttons to the beat of a metronome, except the beat of the sound and the beat of the flashing lights on the screen don't match and if you follow the lights, you're sunk. eventing is just all three events in a row.

whenever you win, the resident Mean Girl accuses you of cheating, and the Stud Farm owner says he’s so proud of you. there’s a morning-evening cycle and after the sun sets, the stud farm owner tells you the day is over and to go get rest and come back tomorrow. this happens instantly and changes nothing.

you get coins from winning, which you can use to purchase unlockable wearable items for your horse and your rider! although i don't think anything can save this outfit.

you can't customize this rider at all, either, and there's only like four horse color options and then a few custom markings.

next you go to Training in the Training arena, and the stud farm owner teaches you the one trick that distinguishes your competition level from the next, and then you compete at the next level. the mean girl is always competing in the same races as you, and she always scores exactly 85, which is honestly more impressive than getting 100, that's so specific. you have a childhood best friend who shows up every now and then to remind you to take care of your horse like you used to, and that you’ve always been such a better rider than her.

then, although i swear it’s not in the tutorial, you eventually realize you can click on the woods north of the map and go on trail rides, which get you involved in cutscenes that tiptoe around the idea of the game having a plot. so far the mean girl has been caught trying to tire out my horse & we got to chase her “to stop her from hurting herself” and then there was no resolution after she was caught. i was so surprised that she would do such a thing that i tried to take a screenshot and got this weird glitch where half of the stable turned invisible, revealing a second secret stable in the distance... so mysterious...

then we were ordered to ride out there and take a picture of the town using the camera function, which you can use at any time when on a trail ride which Is Fun! here's a picture i took of some sheep!

they're so smooth...

after that, a vet came along with a sick horse and made me ride the entire trail with him slower than a gallop, which is frustrating because the entire trail takes like seven whole minutes to complete, so i started watching videos some random kid fight a giant spider in Grounded while doing that. i also got tired of taking care of my horse ramune, but just feeding her boosts her health, and so far there's been no repercussions to just feeding her a lot and doing nothing else.

the game is pretty repetitive, but if I were still a preteen or younger and not yet aware of my surroundings and the world around me, my dreams of someday riding a Real Horse would elevate this game to a new level. you have to use your imagination and get yourself invested in it in order to have fun with it. and for some, that’s what you’re looking for. overall, it sure is a horse game, and it’s not actively bad, it’s just mid.

i'm rating this game 2.5 out of 5 stars!

★★✬☆☆

smooth cows

[noblesixjm04]

I can't get this out of my head. It's just something that ive had rattling around. If this doesn't make much sense I'm sorry lol but.

Do you ever think about if the Spartan ii's ever met one of those siblings without realizing it?

Like. John meeting a young female marine. She's quick witted and wicked smart. There is almost nothing she will back down from. At least not until she gets a "win." She will never leave one of her teammates behind. She's also known among her friends for her dry sense of humor.

One day she runs into John whiles he's out of armor. She never realizes that he's the Master Chief as they stare at one another. Blue eyes look into blue. The roots of her hair are blonde. Contrasted against a dark brown. They share the same smattering of freckles. Dusted along their face and down to their arms. Petering out along the backs of their hands.

And when she smiles there's a gap in her front teeth. (One tooth is chipped from a hard won game of King of the Hill.) She jokes that they match.

Apparently her brother had to. Her parents told her about him. How he had passed a few years before she was born. Her mother told her about her and her brothers shared a constellation of freckles.

Maybe Kelly runs into a pair of twin engineers. One is a girl. The other a boy. The girl has her hair cropped short. It's faded green. The boy has long hair. Held back in a tight braid. It's blue.

They strike up a conversation with Kelly one day. Mostly out of boredom. At one point talking about how they had been on their schools track team. Twin Terrors they had been called. They were the fastest in the entirety of their schools career.

They are the only two out of the group of engineers and scientists that could match her humor.

Kelly never sees them again after that. But she thinks about them often enough. About how they all shared the same accented voice.

About the day they all raced.

She won. Of course. But something about it made her feel like she was missing something. She matched it to the same feeling to her younger years with the rest of the ii's on Reach. On some of the few days they had true fun.

Linda was sent to therapy. Well. Not really sent. It was... Suggested. That she go.

Linda did. This time. For the first time. The last time.

She met an older man. Her elder by about three or four years. With the same red hair, that has streaks of white at the temples, and piercing green eyes.

Those eyes that looked at her like she does down the snipers scope. Those eyes that seemed to know her own.

She could see them widen. Hear the hitch on his breath as they flicker to a photograph and then back to her.

He...

Maybe she had seen him in passing once. Despite him never having been on this ship before.

He has been the one to pull the trigger.

"I don't think I'm the right match for you." His voice rumbled in a familiar way.

When she left. Linda tried to stop thinking about the worn, frames photo on his desk. The one with a boy. About eight or nine. With a shock of bright red hair. He held an archery trophy in one hand. In his other. The hand of a little girl. Close to five. With that same shock of red hair and green eyes that seemed to see you even through the cameras lense.

Fred meets a medic after a nasty injury. The Odst's and Marines in his company joke that he has as getting the best medic around.

He was a young man. Kind and deeply empathetic.

Those same Marines also joked about how the two of them could be siblings in a different life. With how they shared the same sloped nose and sharp jaw. The same, soft manner of speaking.

"Seriously Lieutenant. Just give the Doc the same hair cut. Could fool me that's for sure."

The medic said that he did have a brother. One that he has never met. That he had passed away a few months before he had been born .

But he and his parents visited his grave every year on his brother's birthday. And that this was the first year that he wouldn't be able to.

"He's be turning thirty three today." The medic had just finished Fred's stitches.

"Oh." Fred spoke it before it could be stopped.

"Oh what?" The medic had asked.

"I turned thirty three today." It was one of the few things he remembered. Something he rarely thought about. Because something around it had made his heart hurt.

"Here then. Happy birthday." The medic handed Fred a chocolate granola bar.

[iluvshinytwink]

"Did you just say you love me?" - Jude Bellingham

"Be my lover every night."

Synopsis: In which you're baking with Jude as a date where Jude plans to say his first 'I love you' to you !

Now Playing . . . Ruthless by The Marias

a/n: i may or may not have gotten this idea from a show ive been binge watching for the past month 🙄🙄

ITWASJUSTAREALLYCUTEIDEAOKAY..

This also may or may not be an escape to forget im a layout artist for my exam and i literally have nothing in mind.

When Jude wanted to bake in your house you were a little skeptic, well, a little nervous on the fact he might burn your house down. This was your 6th date with your boyfriend and every date felt better then the last! Not this one though since there was a probability your house would burn down.

With enough promises that your house wouldn't burn down from your boyfriend you reluctantly agreed to it.

"Jude?" You greeted confused over the phone.

"Hi! I'm gonna come over by 5, okay?" Jude's enthusiastic voice said from the other line.

"Huh? I thought your practice was until 6?" You asked, sipping your drink. "They'll understand." Jude laughed. "And you already have the ingredients set and everything?" You smiled. "Yeah, duh. I have cookie cutters and everything!" Jude giggled which made you roll your eyes out of embarrassment and a little amusement. "Okay, bye then, Pillsbury Doughboy." You joked with a smile.

"Yeah, bye-- I--" Jude stammered. "I?" You chuckled, waiting for him to finish his statement. "I-- I'll see you later." Jude quickly said before ending the call.

Jude dug his phone in his pocket with a sigh and a racing heart. Right there. He was gonna slip, right there. A sigh escapes Jude's lips. He was so close to saying the forbidden words: "I love you". He's been wanting to tell you those words ever since the first date ended and a few minutes ago he was about to say it, over phone of all places.

This date was about having fun and making cute things with his girlfriend but mostly, this was the date where he wanted to say the forbidden words to you. The words that's been on his mind every time he looked at you. The words he wanted to say to you then and now. The words he wanted to hear from your lips too.

Jude hops in his car, checking the time which read 4:35pm. Jude looks over to the passenger seat where a brown bag full of baking equipment laid on top. Jude spots a bright red shape peeking out of the brown bag and decides to take it out.

It was a bright red cookie cutter. Jude couldn't help but smile as his heart raced knowing that he bought that stupid little cutter just for this occasion. Maybe you'll laugh at him wholeheartedly because of the cutter or you were going to giggle uncontrollably because of how cute it was, either way, he'd enjoy it with every passing minute.

You went over to your kitchen and started preparing. Jude didn't specify what the two of you were going to bake as you didn't bother to ask.

You wiped a damp cloth on your counter as your heart started pounding. Even after all these dates you couldn't help but feel giddy whenever you knew he was coming.

You didn't know what specifically was gonna go through this date but all you knew was that your house was going to be filled with honey-dipped laughter and pounding hearts.

About 30 minutes pass and you hear a knock on your door.

"Landlord!" The voice shouts. You felt your eyes rolling to the back of your skull knowing who this voice was.

Your hand twists the doorknob, opening it.

Your eyes meet his and you couldn't help but feel a dust of pink powdering your cheeks.

"Hi." Jude breaths out with a smile, his pearly whites peeking. "Hey." You whispered with a bashful smile.

"I didn't know my landlord could be so cute." You said, breaking the silence. "I didn't know either." Jude laughs as he enters your house.

"What're we baking?" You asked as Jude places a big brown bag on your counter. "Cookies!" Jude says with a smile, you smiled back joyously. "All this stuff for cookies?" You said, looking over the brown bag which was filled to the top with whatever ingredients Jude thought may be needed for cookies.

Jude begins taking out the items from the brown bag and you immediately noticed the bright red cookie cutter along with other cutters. A blush dusted your cheeks as you examined it.

Jude looks over to you, smiling. "This is so cute." You breathed out. "You bought this for me?" You said, looking into his eyes. Jude nodded with a chuckle.

Jude stirred the batter in a pot while you watched. "I want to stir." You said. Jude giggles, continuing to stir. "No, you're in charge of decorating." Jude said, looking over to you. "I'm the brawn, you're the beauty." Jude says with a proud smile.

You and Jude sat on the floor, eyes glued on your oven as the orange light illuminated both of your faces.

"Do you think we added enough chocolate chip cookies?" Jude whispers to you. "I think we added too much." You whispered back.

You looked over to Jude, his eyes still on the oven. You could see the orange light shade his face and you could also see the orange light in his eyes as he stared with focus. His mouth was gaped a little as he stared.

A warm smile wrapped your lips.

Around 30 minutes pass and that was 30 minutes of Jude doing nothing but sitting on your kitchen floor as he stared at the cookies which slowly rose.

"I think they're done!" Jude shouts excitedly. An excited yelp was heard from you as you quickly got your oven mittens.

You opened the oven and soon came an aroma thag engulfed the both of you. Jude takes a big inhale before exhaling, pleased with the smell.

You place the baking pan on your counter as Jude followed the aroma like a hungry dog.

"Can we put the cutters in now?" Jude whispered with awe. "Not yet, you're gonna burn yourself." You laughed. "But it smells so good!" Jude exclaimed. "Just wait another 15-25 minutes, Jude." You rolled your eyes, dragging your boyfriend away from the cookies.

The two of you were situated on the couch, your knees hugged to your chest as a show played on the TV. Jude's head was on your shoulder as he was slowly drifting to sleep.

"Tired from baking already?" You whispered to your boyfriend. "No." Jude blurted. "Maybe." Jude whispers.

The two of you were now back in your kitchen as the two of you hovered on the fresh batch of cookies.

Jude quickly took a cutter and pressed it on the batch. You laughed at his excitement. You quickly took the heart-shaped one and pressed it on the pan.

Jude takes a small piece of the pan and pops it in his mouth. You looked over to him, waiting for a look of approval or disappointed.

Jude's eyes quickly light up and his lips tug into a pleased smile. "Mm!" Jude exclaims. Jude takes another piece and offers it to you.

Your hand was about to reach out for the given piece before you decided to open your mouth for Jude to pop it in.

You opened your mouth with a giggle. Jude smiled wholeheartedly, placing the piece of cookie in your mouth.

You took a piping bag in your hands which was filled with mild frosting to decorate the cookies with. Jude takes another piping bag and begins to decorate his own heart-shaped cookie.

Jude takes a deep breath. This is where his plan was finally going into motion. He was going to write 'I love you' on the cookie and hope you got the message and hopefully reciprocate the message.

"I'm done with mine!" You squealed, looking down on your cookie. "I'm done too." Jude sighs with relief. You face your boyfriend, eyes looking for his plate with his cookie. You looked at his part of the counter and noticed that there was no plate with no cookie. You looked over to your boyfriend who was also facing you and with his hands behind his back and a cheeky smile wrapping his lips.

You laughed, excited with whatever design he made that made him hide it from you.

"Close your eyes." Jude whispered with a smile, nearing you. You closed your eyes as you tried to fight your smile.

Jude takes a deep breath, heart racing and itching.

Jude brings the plate to his chest, he looked down at the cookie once more trying to see if there were any imperfections.

Jude's head then lifts to you where you were still smiling giddily.

Jude then thought if you weren't going to say the words back, his heart sinks. He looked back at you and he suddenly calmed down. Deep down he knew that you loved him even without even saying it. And he hoped that deep down you knew that too.

"Open your eyes." Jude whispered and you did so. Your eyes quick found the plate and quickly read the message displayed.

"I love you." The cookie read. Your mouth gaped open as your heart began beating faster. You looked up to your boyfriend to be assured of the message.

"I love you." Jude said a little weakly. Your eyes met his and his eyes displayed nothing but love, love that was for you.

"I love you too." You breathed out with a smile.

This was so detailed for what ☹️💔💔 i love making fluff ‼️‼️ with all the angsts i've made i think i've forgotten how fun writing fluff was WAGHHGGAGAGAG

I SWEAR BRO BEABADOOBEE AND THE MARIAS DOES SOMETHING TO YOU ESPECIALLY WHEN UR WRITING FLUFF 😼��😼

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

august 26, 2021 4:00 a.m. a balcony, somewhere

time somehow seems to simultaneously slow to a crawl and race beyond the speed of light. grant doesn’t remember when they’d ended up perched like lovebirds at the pinnacle of a staircase, peering out over the night-drenched landscape, but it must have been a while ago. customers have long since stopped streaming in and out of the restaurant on the street below.

he remembers in better detail the stream of their conversation–they’d shifted from food and a strangely peaceful, humorous discussion of kicking the bucket to movies, and at some point, paranormal stories came up along the way.

it’d be hard to forget talking to yunha.

there’s something curiously enrapturing about her, something that had drawn him to her when he first made eye-contact with her.

the look in her eyes, maybe. it’s piercing, like she’s baring right through your skin and into your soul, but not malicious or judgmental. it’s friendly, it’s curious, it’s playful.

the way she speaks, maybe. she’s the most engaged conversationalist he’s ever encountered. everything you say, whether she agrees or disagrees, is met with affirmations and a lot of nodding. yes, yes, of course. i see, i see. i understand. ohhh, wow! really?

she’s unraveling every shard of the puzzle that is his personality and piecing it back together in one whole picture, analyzing it. figuring it out. appreciating it.

or maybe it’s the sweetness that radiates off her. she appears unafraid to smile, instead all too happy to flash those pretty, crooked bunny teeth for the world to see.

“so, i'm going to guess you’re not accidentally good at singing.”

she seems not to mind revealing her own puzzle pieces either, and the more she says about herself, the more fascinated he is with her. with who she is. with what makes her tick.

“i hope it’s not an accident,” yunha replies, laughing, “because shit, then years worth of practice was a waste.”

“time enjoyed is never time wasted.”

the unabashed cringe of the line garners an immediate eye roll, but she still seems to find it funny.

they’ve definitely been sitting here a while. grant straightens his back, fixing his gradually slouching posture, and is is met with an immediate flash of pain, distinct from the chronic dull ache underlying every day of his life, that radiates down every vertebra.

“what got you into music, though?”

yunha’s rosy pink lips purse in thought as she dwells on the question.

“a lot of things. my parents like music. i listened to a lot of different kinds of songs my whole life, first with them, and then later with my friends. i had some time between classes and studying to spend having fun, but i couldn't spend any money, so my friends and i would go to this music store. we walked around and picked random albums to listen to on the headphones. we never bought anything.”

grant nods supportively. “what’s, like, the first album you remember really liking? or albums. you don’t have to pick one.”

“ah! i treasure so many albums. seo taiji and boys IV. i think that’s still my favorite nostalgic album ever. i also remember fondly, um, this girl’s in love with you by aretha franklin. i heard that at the music store, and i was so impressed by her talent. i still am.”

“i'm not a music expert. surprise! i know, i know, i'm sorry to tell you, i did not practice for centuries for that wonderful spice girls performance earlier. no, but seriously, i most often just listen to the same old emo stuff i liked when i was 13. so, unfortunately i don’t know the first album at all, at least not yet, but i do know the second one. you have fantastic taste, that’s a classic.”

despite his ignorance, yunha still smiles from ear to ear. “you should look up the first one! look up, like, seo taiji ‘come back home.’ that’s the most popular song on the album. i don’t wanna bias you, so listen on your own and make your own opinions.”

“wilco. and if you don’t mind me asking, how’d you turn the interest in music into a skill? you are talented, but i know it's very much a skill. it does take a lot of practice to become tangibly good at music.”

“to express myself,” yunha says plainly, “it’s easier to tell your story in art than talking about it, and singing is free. you don’t need supplies to learn it. but yes, i needed that kind of outlet, you know? i always liked singing, always did it, but i needed more than only entertainment from it over time.”

“oh yeah, art is helpful. i really should have gotten on that train earlier. i got on board about a year ago. it's much better for you than intellectualizing everything. or at least that's what i tend to do. do you perform, by the way? outside of karaoke, that is."

"sometimes. but also, not in a long time."

there falls a brief, but peaceful lull in the conversation. grant’s eyes draw to black night sky as he recalls the last haphazard art he’d created–the mushy-gushy attempt at processing the universe. seeing it hanging above him now, his thoughts are no less conflicting. light pollution washes out the shining sea of stars, but the sky still retains its beauty, its bewilderment. visible or not, an infinite chain of dimensions and celestial bodies exist in the vacuum of space, orbiting independent of him, yet factoring in the tiny fraction of his mass on the mass of the earth in their delicate ballerina dance across the fabric of spacetime.

the universe must have created me for some reason, for something other than anguish.

his own words. again. ever-present.

“i miss seeing the stars.” yunha’s buttery soft voice breaks his concentration. “you can’t see anything here.”

“polaris.” grant raises his left arm and draws his index finger across the sky until it hovers above the only star he’s seen thus far. “technically, that means we should be able to see sirius, too, but we don’t need to get all science-y and talk about magnitude and that polaris isn’t–”

“i would like it if you did.”

she was thinking of the stars, too.

synchronicity.

“aw shucks! well. i’ll say this, polaris isn’t the brightest star. we just talk about it way more frequently because it has the most cultural significance in the northern hemisphere for, you know, navigation reasons. but hey, give it about 12,000 more years, and it even won’t be the north star anymore. thank you, wobbly earth axis. but also boo, woobly earth axis, because it's a little sad to think about.”

yunha’s eyes glitter with fascination. “it’ll be something else?”

“yep! the next north star will be vega,” he explains, “come on down, you’re the next contestant!”

“maybe we’ll see it happen.”

“if my consciousness is still floating around as little dust particles, that’d be pretty sick. you know? forget fly me to the moon, fly me to vega. why not?”

“i don’t think i'll be dust,” yunha says, not missing a beat at all, even as her focus remains fixed on the faintest twinkle emanating from polaris, “it’s kind of troubling. you don’t want to be, like, stuck in the whole cycle of the universe, but if you’re still here, you can see some really beautiful things.”

“ah. reincarnation?”

“if you’re asking me, you’re not going to be dust. either you escape the suffering or you come back in some kind of physical form, human or not, and you try again.”

grant thinks about it for a moment. and then the feelings, like usual, spill out at once.

“i'm not going to lie, that idea has always given me the heebie-jeebies. i think it’s very cool as a concept, but i'm, like, man, i don’t want to do this shit again. also, look, we're doing the thing again. oh, and shit, that sounded judgmental. i just run my mouth too much."

"most people don't know they lived before. you can't really remember your other lives without a lot of study," she answers, "and no, you don't. i prefer to hear your real opinion. it's actually stupid when people tell you what they think you want to hear."

"do you ever wonder what you were up to last go-around?"

"not too much, but i always heard strange birthmarks and scars are signs from your last death. fears, too. things you avoid. so, i guess, like, a clown stabbed me in the neck with needles."

"are you afraid of storm drains, by any chance? if so, i think pennywise had it out for you."

"hahaha." yunha shakes her head. "wait, i have to ask. is it not worse thinking you can only live once? that's not uncomfortable? feeling like you have to make everything perfect in your one lifetime?"

"oh no, it's terrifying. dying and just being done with everything is eerie, too, because there are nice things to do and see here in the real world. you’re right about that. and yeah, there is a lot of pressure to get it all right. also, that's not even mentioning that there are people i love that i don’t want to be gone forever. i'd like to think they remain somehow. conscious or not. i kind of think they do, but i don’t know. am i contradicting myself? capital-P probably."

“you don’t know what to think.”

grant immediately bursts out laughing. “yeah, no, absolutely not. i do not know. i just kinda waffle around and hope some scientist throws out some numbers and whatnot that proves some explanation of everything correct. but that’s impossible. it’s literally impossible. we can’t even simulate or predict the wacky physics that were going on at the exact moment the big bang happened.”

“not to be, like, all quirky, but...” yunha reaches over, patting him on the shoulder. “maybe don’t think about it? you’re gonna go crazy. you can just not know? and it's fine. this doesn’t mean anything anyway. the answer to anything is already in you, it’s not out there.”

and then she, too, starts giggling all over again and her cheeks blush deep red from sheepish cringe.

another stereotypical line, but he doesn't mind. they sound better coming from her than him anyhow.

a second later and she checks the time on her phone. her cheesy smile erodes into a slight frown.

“ahh, i really need to leave soon. i have a schedule in the morning.”

grant checks the time as well, drawing the sleeve of his hoodie up just enough to read the minuscule roman numerals on his watch.

on the watch an ex-girlfriend gifted him. not päivi, but...

4:00 a.m.

fuck.

right.

you’re leaving the country in two hours.

[gizkasparadise]

2023 wrapped: cdrama edition!

taking a page from @dangermousie and doing an overview of all the cdramas i watched this year (i'll do one for kdramas later)! listed in order of least favorite to most favorite. favorite =/= objectively best/most well-made. just the ones i had the most fun watching.

15 have a crush on you. oh dear lord. this drama should be a case study for what happens when a bad drama has charismatic actors and they keep you trapped hostage. i watched this whole damn thing hating every minute of it on behalf of the poor female lead who definitely deserved better. the ending? absolutely batshit, and not in a fun way. one of the weirdest, worst endings ive seen since with you

14 back from the brink. too kitschy for me, i didn't last long on this one (i think 2 eps lol).

13 gone with the rain. i wanted to like this one because i love sean sun and troll general is exactly what i want out of life. but i didn't like the weird daydream asides, constant animal noise sound effects, and i found everyone kind of off-putting in a non-watchable way, so i peaced out really quick--ep 4ish

12 here we meet again. i love janice wu. i continue to try out her dramas hoping for something to grab me again. this one was pretty boring/too focused on the work element and not the rest of it.

11 exclusive fairytale. i have a secret weakness for youth-to-working-life dramas, so tried this one out. flat, not a lot of chemistry, and very color-by-numbers. the show was clearly made to vehicle jun, and that's okay, but not my thing

10 the starry love. i wanted to like this one because the side characters were fun and i loved the male lead/prince of heaven and all his awkward "please leave by 9" energy. but it bored me overall and unlike most folks i had no interest in the demon secondary ship. i dropped around ep 10

9 my journey to you. it kills me to rank this one so low because it was my most anticipated cdrama this year, but i just couldn't get into it. the pacing was too slow for me, and i couldn't stand how everyone talked to each other (long. pauses. and then. staring. and then. whispers. always the. whispers). i dropped this around midway

8 the love you give me. the chemistry between the leads was cute and it was a decent modern romance. started losing me around the midpoint when the paternity reveal hit and the ML got way into boundary crossing because of it

7 circle of love. objectively not a good drama. in fact, a toxic and batshit drama that has probably made me a worse person for watching it. but gd did my messy ass enjoy the trainwreck.

6 road home. you really got to be in the mood for this one, but it's a nice, understated and slow melo romance. but def not a bingeable show since it takes its time with everything

5 wonderland of love. another drama that i dont think is objectively great, but two competent schemers/martial artists trying to one-up each other is like ship catnip for me and this was a show that lived or died by its ship. surprisingly tame for the screenwriter, and had a happy ending! popcorn watch.

4 till the end of the moon. me and this drama were in a bad romance, which i suppose is thematically appropriate. i hated parts of it, i was super invested in others. the post-dream human arc was giving wuthering heights tragic obsession incredibleness. even with its flaws, i think most of cdramaland is in agreement that lyx/tantai jin stole the ML competition this year. great gowns, beautiful gowns

3 story of kunning palace. i adored the characters in this drama! even when the plot was losing my interest, everyone was cast so well and had so much charisma that i stayed pretty hooked from ep 10ish on. absolutely loved the mean high school theatre director wreck that was xie wei, as well as the other (imo) true love interest of the show, princess leyang. the desperate speech about being like iron is gonna live rent-free in my head

& then 1&2 are way ahead of the others for me this year/a very close race between them!

2 a journey to love. i love this drama so much!!! i have not skipped or speed watched a single scene which for me is a huge feat! great character work across the board -- even the side characters have a lot of nuance and interesting dynamics between them. beautiful fight scenes. great ost. one of the best, most balanced main couples ive seen in a show. it's gonna break my heart in a few eps when it ends, but i'll be happy about it

1 lost you forever (s1). this drama came out of NOWHERE and the vicegrip it had on me while it was airing!!! my favorite FL this year (although a journey to love's ruyi is a close second), and just a ton of fun while also being quietly devastating in parts. i loved how lived in and tired the FL felt, enjoyed the various flavors of mess from her love interests, and enjoyed how extra it could go while still giving us really grounded and complicated characters. this drama gets extra points for converting me on several actors i did not think that highly of before the show.

overall, despite how many i dropped (lol writing it out made me realize i dropped so, so many), cdramas delivered for me this year! my top two are on my short list for favorite dramas, period. everyone go watch a journey to love and lost you forever if you havent yet!!!

AWARDS

Favorite ship: definitely goes to ruyi and yuanzhou from a journey to love. it's just nice to see a couple that mutually supports each other's murders

Favorite FL: xiaoyao from lost you forever with ruyi from journey to love as a very close runner-up. i am here for this year's theme of competent, jaded ladies trying to reclaim their lives

Favorite ML: objectively, tantai jin from till the end of the moon should win this, but story of kunning palace's xie wei was just so entertainingly grumpy, petty, and unhinged which is a winning combo for me.

Favorite 2FL: princess yang ying from a journey to love. she's doing amazing and im proud of her!!

Favorite 2ML: technically third male lead, but xiang liu from lost you forever was my favorite to watch and had the best tuxedo mask exits

Best Cast: a journey to love, i literally adore all of them, even the ones i hate

Best Blood Cough: tantai jin, you beautiful bastard who needs a bib

[9private-rant0291]

Being fit , slim or just not have excess fat is freeing in itself . Ive seen and read too much of the Fat acceptance group whine about everything . Much to all their dismay

1.) No one will comply/copy your lifestyle unless its among your communities

2.) If you say Health at every size . Shut your yap when people are fit or have pretty/skinny/woman privilage

3.) We have a life outside Scarfing down Junkfood and process food

4.) Victim blaming isnt cute . Also saying its linked to racism your using other peoples race as a excuse How pathetic

5.) Health is acessable at many many ways

6.) Healthcare providers dont want to help your butts due to your bublering Selves

7.) Fashion brands wont comply to your demands get over it . Estimate cost per yard of materials and services to make the garments . If you have the skill then Make your own clothing

8.) Yes its your fault you went Fat (except thoes who had legit illness) but thoes intentional weightgain....you are all stupid not learning how Obesity is the gate way to many illnesses

9.) With your distruction , misinformation and bullying You are pushing everyone back then turning them stupid

10.) Being obese Leads to an EARLY DEMISE

11.) Sure its not our problem to care about your Your body . Just showing up as a slob , telling people #9 Your making people unhealthy due to you not putting effort

12.) Stop projecting your insecurities disguised as "Body Positivity" you all stole that community thats suposed to be for the amputies , victims of thoes who be hurt irl and have Scars or have scars that were made fun of!

13.) You all shouldnt have a word in anything about anyone who wants to lose weight to be fit, be pretty, glow up , want to take advantage of pretty privilage

14.) Everyone has Preffrences and when we say we dont like Fat people Get over it

15.) Instead of whining ...again Put in the work .

[scorpioracha]

Channie’s Room

I might be projecting justttt a little bit 🤪 but I know I needed this college student comfort so maybe others did too. If you like what I wrote don’t be shy and like,comment or reblog because they make my world go round. I hope you enjoy! Pls validate me

-Just imagine going straight to Chan’s studio after a long day of classes. All you have to do is send that man a text saying you’re having a hard day and his studio is suddenly empty of all members, a silly little coincidence

He threatened each member not to barge in via their gc

-Seoul is a busy and overstimulating place as is any major city and you didn’t necessarily go to school very close to the JYP building so Channie keeps you entertained your entire public transit ride by sending you texts about what the kids were up to during the day or how Chaeryeong whooped Changbins ass for the third time that week

-anything really to keep your mind of your own stress

-he would never say it but with the whole Eldest™ he has going on you being stressed stresses him out because why is one of his people stressed???

-while making sure you’re calm and okay his mind is racing with every possible outcome for why you could be having a hard time. Period? Sick??? Professor troubles????

-by the time you arrived at the studio he already has a plan made up in his mind to sue the entire department you’re studying in—students and all🤡

-he would set you up all nice and comfy on the couch while doing the quickest checklist for possible injuries or mental distress

-homie is fluffing the pillows next to you like ‘hmmm no bruises🧠📝’

-he’s a worrier and he’s not ashamed of it

-he’s great at keeping it all in his head

-until your eyes get all glassy and you’re sniffling

- be ready for an interrogation🤡 what’s going on? Are you okay? Who did it? Was it that Professor? He never liked that fucking Professor—

-he’s got himself so worked up you couldn’t help but giggle through your tears and you spend the next few minutes calming him down. No one did anything. The Professor you have is lovely. You were just feeling overwhelmed with the workload and knew his studio was a safe place to be, because he was there. now you’ve got him blushing and stuttering and his ears are hot.

-after he gets over himself he turns on Serious Chan mode and is asking you if you’ve had food and water for the day, If you’re sleeping well,etc

-he wants to make sure you’re physically okay and that your urgent needs are met before he gets into the mental with you

-it’s okay if you cry because he’s there to wipe your tears and he’s asking you how long you’ve felt like this, are you seeing an professionals? Because he would drop everyone dollar to his last dime to make sure you’re alright inside and out

-not doing well in a subject? Boom, he somehow knows another idol who aced that subject back when they were in school. Not sleeping well? Wowie the pharmacy is only a ten minute walk away and they have melatonin. He knows you’re eating because he’s made it a habit of you guys sending pics of your meals to each other 1)because it’s fun and 2)he knows how busy life can get for both of you and it’s a good way to keep you accountable

-you better drink your goddamn water because he has no problem dragging your ass into a hospital and asking them to give you an IV

-once you’ve cried your eyes out practically and your head is clear Channie always has spare towels for you to wipe down your face and he’s looking at you with a big grin asking if you wanna try out a new chicken place with him

-you’re always welcome in Chan’s studio, it days like this reminded you how appreciated you are

[effervescentdragon]

*holds out a mic like a reporter* what’s your opinion on the current state of the mcu?

my opinion is that it should have died a long time ago and that everything they do is just abusing the corpse of a frankensteined thing that should have been left and buried a long time ago.

now, i am not that much up to date. i have stopped engaging with mcu after endgame, with the exception of watching the forst season of loki and wakanda forever and i think the eternals, which is good if its taken out of the wider context. my opinion is that the mcu is empty and soulless and a perfect indoctrination into individualist capitalism, warmongering patriarchy and the greedy capital-driven urge of mega corporations and billionaires to replace any sort of humanity with artificially, computer made caricatures of something that once moght have been called art.

i remember that article that tom hiddleston wrote as a response to i believe scorcese sometime way back in 2012, defending superhero movies. i am too lazy to find any refetences so whoever reads this can do their own research and correct me if im wrong anywhere, but i do believe he gave sir christopher reeve as an example. he wrote about the thruths that superheroes explore, how there is not one, but many. how it is the mundanity and the pure humanity that gets amplified and therefore explored and understood through the characters of superheroes, and it all brings us closer to the human experience. that article has stuck with me through all the years ive spent watching these movies and believing in the message - we are all superheroes in our own way. we all make choices, no matter on how much of a micro scale, to do the right thing. to protect, to shield, to fight against injustice. art is, after all, inherently political.

there is none of that in the mcu. ive seen it being chipped away piece by piece over the years, seen the ethical and moral dilemmas we all face in day to day life brought on the big screen to make us understand that there is always a choice, no matter how tough that choice may be, and that every single one of us is capable of both the biggest heroism and the most depraved atrocities, because we are, in essence only human; i have seen all that be replaced with american capitalist war and conquering propaganda, girlboss empty feminism and whatever the fuck those shit "christians" are now pandering and paddling as "family values".

the only god disney worships is obscene amount of money. the only value they respect is how little they can pay and how much they can exploit to get highest monetary value for their shitty cgi-ed recycled propaganda movies. they have turned every character into a twisted version of themselves, assigned value to only those characters who help them propagate their imperialistic capitalist world order, and are fine to spit out dozens of same content (because by now, it is content, devoid of any artistic ideation) and stomp on all that superheroes used to stand for and all that they used to teach us. they also do it in a most insidious way, giving token "other" characters, be it by their race or faith or sexual orientation or gender, while counting on the systematic lowering of critical thinking skills in people to ensure people are dazzled by the shallow representation and never look further away from the rainbow cgi and explosions to understand that mcu has become just another cog in the us imperialist war machine.

i lied. i looked up tom hiddleston's article because i think a shakespearean actor classically trained who quotes tolstoy for fun might have written a better punchline than i could write, in my despondent, disappointed and despairing state of seeing something i've loved with my whole heart be ruined ny human grief. i was right.

"Maybe playing superheroes isn't such an ignoble undertaking after all. "I still believe in heroes," says Samuel L Jackson's Nick Fury in Avengers Assemble. So do I, sir. So do I."

except. except i believe in real life superheroes. in the people protesting against the genocide in gaza. in the people on the ground risking their lives to tell us in the west, about sudan and palestine and uyghur muslims and armenia and congo, in a bid that we might turn our heads and watch the actual real life crises caused by the very imperialists who use these superhero movies to try and save their status quo of opression. i believe in a man who chose self-immolation over being party to the atrocity that is the us military. i believe in my friends in germany who go out every weekend and fight against the rising nazi regime. i believe in every person that has spoken out against the atrocities in the world, every person that has donated and educated and debated and wrote to the representatives and protested. and they still do it, and will continue to do it. these people are the real superheroes to me, and guess what? they are just humans. and those people comitting atrocities right now? they are just humans too.

this is what the superhero comics and movies that i used to watch taught me. that humans are those who have the capacity for the biggest heroism and most despicable atrocities both. we just have to choose. and that is not something that anyone will be able to learn from the mcu anymore.

[skateordiebitch]

PHOTOSYNTHESIS || EUPHORIA AU

CHAPTER IV: Sunburn

this is apart of a series, make sure to read the other chapters first :) I. PhotoWorld II. New Year's III. Babydoll

summary: elliot and indigo sneak off for their weekend getaway. giovanni's getting more suspicious. elliot's got a bottle for two, and feeling a lil' frisky... but, indigo forgets to hide something big.

IV. SUNBURN

"Have fun on your trip, baby. I'm going to miss you so much," Indigo said softly, smiling as she leaned against the doorframe, watching Giovanni pack.

The late afternoon sun filtered in through the window, casting a warm glow on the room. For a moment, it felt almost peaceful—almost normal.

Giovanni, standing by the bed, glanced over his shoulder, flashing her a brief smile that softened his usual hard expression.

"I'm gonna miss you more," he replied, folding another shirt and tucking it into his suitcase.

His voice had a tenderness to it that Indigo hadn't heard in a while, and it made her heart ache a little.

She walked over to him, resting her hand lightly on his arm as he packed.

"You've never been to Arizona before. It'll be a new adventure," she said, trying to keep the mood light.

He nodded, glancing up at her, "Yeah, it should be interesting. The team's got a few things planned. We're probably gonna see the Grand Canyon."

Indigo felt a flicker of something familiar between them, a memory of how things used to be—before the suspicion, before the constant tension.

"Awe, that's been one of your dreams!" Indigo exclaims, watching Giovanni smile.

"Yeah, good memory, babe."

It's strange; She hasn't seen him smile in so long, that it was making her feel emotional.

She smiled, leaning closer, her voice dropping to a playful whisper, "Just don't forget to call me while you're out there..."

Giovanni's lips curved into a smirk, and for a split second, the walls between them seemed to fall.

He turned, resting his hands on her hips, pulling her closer, "Oh, I won't forget. You'll be the first person I call when I land, baby. Promise you that."

The warmth of his touch sent a spark through her, reminding her of the chemistry they'd once shared.

It wasn't gone—not entirely.

But, it was buried under layers of mistrust and resentment, like something fragile trying to break through.

Indigo let herself lean into it for a moment, wrapping her arms around his neck as she kissed him softly.

For a brief moment, Giovanni kissed her back with the kind of intensity that used to make her heart race.

His hands slid down her back, pulling her in closer, as if he was holding on to the way things used to be.

Indigo could feel the pull, the magnetism that had once drawn them together in the first place.

But then, just as quickly, the tension crept back in.

Giovanni pulled away slightly, his brow furrowing. His hands lingered on her hips, but his gaze shifted, hardening again.

"How am I supposed to trust you while I'm gone?" he asked, his voice suddenly cold, the warmth from just moments before dissipating like smoke.

Indigo blinked, the air between them shifting in an instant.

"What?" she asked, her heart sinking. She could feel the familiar knot of dread forming in her stomach, "Where is this coming from?"

Giovanni released her and turned back to his suitcase, zipping it with a rough pull.

"You know how I feel about this stuff, Indigo. I can't just act like it doesn't bother me."

The warmth was gone, replaced by that familiar chill, the constant suspicion that shadowed every interaction. Indigo felt the sting of disappointment.

"Giovanni..." She trailed off, unsure of how to even begin defending herself.

She wanted to tell him that she loved him, that she wasn't doing anything wrong, but the words felt heavy on her tongue to even begin to say any of that.

Indigo's heart sank.

"I'm not—" She stopped herself, clenching her jaw.

Defending herself always seemed to backfire.

No matter what she said, Giovanni twisted it around, like her guilt was a foregone conclusion. She was so tired of it.

So tired of feeling like she had to constantly prove her loyalty, her love, when he never did the same for her.

"I'm not doing anything wrong," she said finally, her voice firmer this time, "I'm just going to be at home."

"Yeah? With who?" His tone was sharp, laced with accusation, as if she had someone waiting in the wings the second he left.

Indigo's eyes narrowed, her patience quickly eroding. "With my brother? My family?"

Giovanni turned to face her, arms crossed, "Watch it--" He stopped, for once, before finishing his sentence.

He had to admit that she had a point, there.

"It's just... you know how I feel about this stuff. How do I know you're not talking to anyone behind my back? You've been real secretive lately."

Secretive?

The irony stung.

Indigo fought the urge to laugh bitterly.

Of course, she had secrets—one big one, actually. But, not for the reasons Giovanni thought.

He didn't know about Elliot, about the growing connection between them, the quiet moments stolen in the backroom of PhotoWorld.

Giovanni didn't know how much Indigo wanted to run from this—run from him.

Indigo's heart clenched at the accusation, and she bit her lip, struggling to keep her voice steady, "I've never given you a reason not to trust me."

Giovanni's gaze hardened as he stepped closer, his voice low, "It's not about what you've done. It's about what you could do."

The knot in Indigo's stomach tightened, frustration bubbling to the surface. She took a deep breath, trying to hold back the bitterness rising in her throat.

"I'm not cheating on you, Gio. I'm not even talking to anyone else. I don't know how many times I have to continuously tell you that."

He stared at her, the silence between them thick with unresolved tension.

For a moment, it felt like they were standing on the edge of something fragile, something that could shatter at any moment.

Giovanni's jaw clenched, and he looked away, running a hand through his dark hair.

"Alright," he muttered, but the unease lingered in his voice.

Indigo watched him, her chest aching.

There had been a time when they didn't need to talk around each other like this, when the chemistry between them was enough to keep things easy and light.

But now, it felt like every word was a minefield.

She took a step closer, reaching out to touch his arm again.

"I know we've had... problems," she said softly, "But, I really don't want to fight right before you leave."

Giovanni looked down at her, his expression softening slightly. He reached up, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I don't want to fight either," he admitted for once, his voice quieter now.

For a moment, it felt like they could find their way back to each other, like maybe the tension wasn't insurmountable.

Indigo leaned into him, resting her head against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.

Giovanni wrapped his arms around her, holding her close, and for a brief second, it felt like everything might be okay.

But as she stood there, feeling the weight of his embrace, Indigo couldn't shake the other thoughts racing through her mind.

Elliot's face flashed in her head, the secret trip they were planning, the possibilities the weekend had in store;

She wasn't cheating, not technically, but she was lying.

She was sneaking away from Giovanni, from whatever relationship they'd built, because part of her needed to breathe.

And in that moment, she couldn't deny the growing rift between them.

The one that had pushed her closer to someone else.

-

The next morning, Indigo stood in front of her mirror, her reflection staring back at her, conflicted.

The chemistry with Giovanni still existed—buried beneath the mistrust and anger—but it's not enough to forget whatever she has with Elliot.

Not when things had gotten so toxic.

Not when every interaction felt like a test of her loyalty, a test she never knew how to pass.

Indigo watched as Giovanni stuffed his suitcase into the back of his car, trying to shake off the lingering tension from their argument last night.

The air was thick with unspoken words, and her heart felt heavy as she prepared to say goodbye.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come to the airport with you?" She asked, forcing a smile to mask her unease.

Giovanni shrugged, not bothering to meet her gaze, "I know how to drive myself."

Indigo took a step closer, feeling the urge to connect with him, to bridge the widening gap between them.

"I'll miss you," she said softly, hoping to invoke a flicker of warmth in him.

But he turned away, his jaw clenched, and for a moment, Indigo felt the familiar dread creep back in.

"Why are you so clingy all of a sudden?" he snapped, his voice sharp, "You think I need you to hold my hand while I pack?"

Indigo blinked, taken aback by the sudden shift.

"I'm not—Gio, I'm just trying to help you," she replied, her voice steady despite the rising tension.

He scoffed, throwing the last of his things into the trunk with more force than necessary.

"Help me? By worrying about who I'm with while I'm gone? You think I would cheat on you? That's not support, Indigo. That's insecurity."

The accusation stung, and her body filled with frustration.

How could he say that when he accused her of the same thing just last night?

"I'm not insecure, you're putting words into my mouth, now! I just want you to know that I care, all i'm doing is trying to help you."

"Caring looks different, babe," he shot back, stepping closer, invading her space, "It looks like trusting me, not acting like some paranoid girlfriend."

Indigo felt her pulse quicken, and she took a step back, trying to defuse the situation.

"You're making this worse. I don't want to fight before you leave, remember?"

Giovanni took a deep breath, his eyes darkening.

"Maybe you should've thought about that before you opened your mouth," he said, his voice low and threatening.

Indigo felt tears prick at her eyes.

"Giovanni, c'mon. You're being unfair. You can't say shit like that, when you were trying to accuse me last night."

"Oh, cut the crap," he interrupted, taking a step closer, invading her space, "You think I don't see the way you look at that guy at work? You think I don't notice?"

Indigo recoiled slightly at his words, feeling the heat of his anger radiating off him, "You're being ridiculous! Elliot is just a coworker!"

"Elliot, huh? More like a coworker who's been spending too much time with you. Who has his own plans for you, I bet," he accused, his voice rising with each syllable, "And here you are, acting like I'm the bad guy for worrying about you."

"You're not worried; you're being controlling!" she snapped back, anger flaring in her chest. "Why can't you just trust me?"

"Trust you?" he laughed bitterly, shaking his head, "How am I supposed to trust a girl who thinks it's okay to be friends with a guy who clearly has a thing for her?"

"We just work together, Gio... I have nothing else to say, because there is nothing to say."

"What's to say you won't run off with him when I'm gone? You have no idea how hard it is to be away from you and not know what you're doing!"

Indigo felt tears prick at her eyes.

"Giovanni, listen to yourself... You're being unfair. I'm not going to cheat on you."

"And yet here I am, wondering if I'll come back to find you in bed with him," he spat, his voice dripping with venom, "It wouldn't be the first time I've caught you in a lie."

The air crackled with tension, and she could see the shadows of doubt crossing his face.

"Why do you even care?" she shot back, her voice rising, "You're leaving me for a whole weekend! I should be the one who's worried!"

But Giovanni took a step closer, his voice dropping to a menacing whisper, "Don't think I won't find out, Indigo. I will always find out."

Indigo felt a chill run down her spine, but she stood her ground. "And what will you do? Hurt me again? Kill me?! Is that how this works, now?"

It took everything in her to not ask; Is this how our relationship works, now?

His eyes flashed, anger boiling beneath the surface, "Don't test me, Indigo. You know I don't play games. You're mine, and I won't let some guy come in and take what's mine away from me."

"Yours?" She laughed bitterly, the sound harsh in the silence. "You don't own me, Giovanni. I'm not your property! We aren't even together, like that."

In a flash, his hands shot out, grabbing her wrists with a grip that was too tight, too forceful.

He slams her against the truck, her tailbone impacting the car, hard enough to shake it.

"What the hell, Giovanni!" Indigo gasped, her heart racing as pain shot through her. She yanked her arm away, rubbing the spot where his fingers had dug into her skin and her lower back.

"Don't act like a victim, Indigo. It's a terrible fucking look on you," he hissed, stepping back but keeping his eyes locked on her, "I'm just trying to get through to you. You need to understand that this is how the world works. You're an adult, I can't be there to babysit you."

"Let go of me!" she shouted, her voice rising as panic surged through her.

She looked around, half-expecting neighbors to emerge from their doors, but no one seemed to notice, "You're hurting me!"

He hesitated for a moment, the anger flickering in his eyes, but then he relaxed his stance, his expression softening, if only slightly.

"I didn't mean to hurt you," he muttered, almost to himself, "But you need to get it through your head that I can't stand this."

Indigo took a deep breath, shaking with anger and disbelief, "Can't stand what? I'm sorry, Gio..."

Giovanni looked at her, his expression shifting, the anger flickering out like a candle's flame.

For a brief moment, it seemed like he might reach for her again, but instead, he turned away, taking a step back.

"Nothing, whatever. Just fucking forget it. I'll see you when I get back," he said, his voice strained as he grabbed his suitcase, slamming the trunk shut with more force than necessary.

"Just remember, Indigo," he said, turning back to her with a cold glare, "You're always one step away from losing everything."

She didn't even want to begin to think what that could possibly mean.

As he climbed into the driver's seat, Indigo felt a mix of relief and dread wash over her.

She forced herself to breathe, watching as he pulled away from the curb, the sound of the engine fading into the distance.

Once he was gone, she let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding.

The adrenaline still coursed through her, and she couldn't shake the feeling that this was a turning point.

-

Once the door closed behind her, Indigo shook off the residue of the encounter, determined to leave the toxicity behind—at least for the weekend.

She grabbed her bag and headed out, ready to meet Elliot for their trip to the beach.

-

As Elliot's car pulled up to her driveway, Indigo climbed into the passenger seat, a mixture of excitement and apprehension swirling in her stomach.

She could already imagine the scent of saltly ocean, and she felt a spark of hope as they began their road trip.

"You good?" Elliot asked, glancing over at her as he turned on the engine.

Indigo nodded, forcing a smile, hiding her wrists with her sweatshirt, "Yeah, just ready for a fucking break."

Elliot flashed her a grin, the warmth in his expression melting away some of her tension.

"Then let's hit the road!"

The two of them set off, the sun shining down and the wind tousling Indigo's hair as they drove down the highway.

The world outside the window blurred into a swirl of greens and blues, a vibrant backdrop to the excitement building inside her.

They chatted easily as they drove, music blaring from the speakers, laughter punctuating their conversation.

Elliot was infectious, his energy pulling Indigo out of her head and into the moment. She could feel the weight of her worries begin to lift as they traveled farther away from home.

After a while, they stopped for snacks at a roadside diner, the neon sign flickering overhead.

As they settled into a booth, Indigo glanced out the window, the sun dipping lower in the sky.

-

"I can't believe we're actually doing this," she said, taking a sip of her soda.

Elliot leaned back in his seat, a mischievous grin spreading across his face, "Just you wait until we hit the beach. I got us a hotel room that overlooks the ocean... It'll be amazing."

Indigo felt a flutter of excitement in her chest-- For all the years she's been with Giovanni, he's never once done anything nearly as romantic.

"Did you really?"

"Just you and me, babydoll."

"You better not be lying to me," she teased, playfully nudging him.

"Never!" he exclaimed, putting a hand over his heart dramatically, "You'll see. I've got everything planned out."

After they finished their food, they jumped back into the car, the anticipation building as they drove toward the coast.

The sun sank lower on the horizon, painting the sky in shades of orange and pink. Indigo found herself lost in the beauty of it all.

Elliot had the windows down, letting the cool evening air whip through the car.

His playlist played softly in the background, a mix of indie and old-school rock that made the journey feel like something out of a movie.

The tension that usually hung between them had evaporated, replaced with easy laughter and stolen glances.

"Wanna know something?" Indigo asked after they'd been on the road for about an hour.

"Yeah, sure," Elliot said. His tone was casual, but Indigo could hear the curiosity in his voice.

She sighed, resting her head back against the seat.

"Gio wasn't always like this, you know? Controlling. Angry. Jealous. It started out fine, normal even. We've been together since high school. So many years together, but so many lies. Over time... things just changed."

Elliot glanced at her, his brows furrowed.

"And now?"

"Now, I feel so stuck," she said quietly, "It's hard to explain, but it's like... I really can't leave. I've tried before. But every time, I get pulled back. I try to leave, and then I think about the old times we've had together. Where we could have a conversation without him screaming at me. Where he trusted me, loved me..."

She pauses.

"I don't even know if I love him anymore. Maybe, I love the memories of him. The memories of us at football games, at Homecoming," She can feel the tears prickle in her eyes, but doesn't let them fall, "When we would sing at the top of our lungs in his car, when he would surprise me with breakfast every morning..."

The tears fell slowly, one by one.

Elliot didn't say anything right away.

He wanted to tell her that he saw those moments between them.

It's as if she's so consumed by Giovanni, she forgets that they went to school together.

He saw them kiss in front of everyone at every game. He passed the couple every day during lunch.

But, he also saw when she'd come in late to class with puffy eyes. When she would sit in front of him with her head down. When he'd pass by their car and hear them screaming at each other.

Instead, he reached over and placed his hand on hers, his thumb brushing over her knuckles.

It was a small gesture, but it made Indigo's chest tighten.

"You don't think you deserve more than that?" He asked after a moment, "You deserve to be happy, not stuck with someone who treats you like a possession."

Indigo looked out the window, the highway stretching out before them, "I don't think I deserve it. But, it's never going to be that simple."

"Maybe not," Elliot said, not asking anymore questions, "But it doesn't mean you have to keep living like this."

They fell into silence again, the hum of the road and the music the only sounds between them.

Indigo could feel the tension building—this unspoken thing between them that neither of them wanted to name.

It wasn't just about sneaking off to the beach for the weekend.

It was about something deeper, something neither of them could ignore.

-

As they drove, the landscape began to change.

The buildings gave way to open fields and forests, the air becoming fresher the closer they got to the coast. Indigo found herself relaxing, the miles putting more and more distance between her and Giovanni, between her and all the things that weighed her down.

By the time they were halfway there, the sun had set completely, leaving only the faint glow of the dashboard and the moonlight guiding them.

Elliot was driving with one hand on the wheel, the other resting casually on his knee. He looked over at her, his face illuminated by the soft blue light of the dashboard.

"You ever been to this beach before?" he asked, breaking the comfortable silence.

Indigo shook her head. "No. I've never really had the chance to go anywhere."

"Well, you're in for a treat, then," Elliot said, his eyes crinkling at the corners with a smile. "It's one of my favorite places. Quiet, peaceful. We'll have the whole beach to ourselves. An entire room to ourselves."

"Sounds like paradise," Indigo murmured, smiling softly as she leaned her head against the window.

She could almost imagine it—the feel of the sand beneath her feet, the sound of the waves crashing against the shore, the freedom of just being able to exist without fear or worry.

The idea of the two of them alone in a hotel room, was occupying an entire other part of her brain. A part that sent her so much into euphoria to fully wrap her brain around.

Two hours into the drive, Indigo's phone buzzed. Her heart leaped into her throat as she glanced down at the screen.

Giovanni: I just landed

Her hands trembled slightly as she typed out a response.

Indigo: how was the flight baby?

She could feel Elliot's eyes on her, but he didn't say anything. He didn't have to.

The tension was palpable, like a third presence in the car. Giovanni had always been possessive, but lately, his suspicions had been growing. Indigo knew it was only a matter of time before he started putting the pieces together.

"You okay?" Elliot asked after a moment, his voice soft.

"Yeah," Indigo said, slipping her phone into her bag. "I'm fine. Just... nervous."

He reached over and placed his hand on her knee, squeezing gently.

"Don't worry. He isn't here. Tonight's about you. Us. Just let go, even if it's just for a little while."

Indigo nodded, but the knot in her stomach didn't loosen. She wanted to believe him. She wanted to just enjoy this night, to let go of everything and live in the moment.

But Giovanni's presence loomed large in her mind, like a storm cloud threatening to darken their stolen time together.

-

The sun hung low on the horizon, casting a warm golden hue over the beach; making the waves shimmer like diamonds.

As soon as Indigo and Elliot pulled into the parking lot of their beachfront hotel, the girl stepped out of the car, taking a deep breath of the salty air.

It was everything Elliot had promised—quiet, secluded, and absolutely breathtaking.

The rhythmic sound of waves crashing against the shore played like a sweet symphony, promising a perfect evening ahead. The salty breeze tousled her hair, and she couldn't help but smile, feeling a weight lift from her shoulders.

"Can you believe we're actually here, right now?" Elliot asked, his eyes shining with excitement.

He took her hand, pulling her close as they walked toward the entrance, their fingers intertwined.

The air was alive with possibility, and for the first time in what felt like ages, Indigo felt free.

As they entered the hotel lobby, the decor was a beautiful blend of coastal charm and modern elegance.

Light blue walls mimicked the sea, and the scent of coconut and sunscreen hung in the air, making it feel like a paradise just waiting to be explored.

They approached the check-in desk, and after a quick exchange with the receptionist, they were handed the key to their room.

"Room 304," Elliot said, grinning as he gestured for her to follow him.

They made their way up the stairs, the excitement bubbling between them with each step. As they reached their room, Elliot unlocked the door, and they stepped inside.

The space was cozy and inviting, with large windows that framed a breathtaking view of the ocean.

The sound of waves filled the room, and Indigo felt a rush of warmth as she looked around. A plush king-sized bed adorned with soft linens sat in the center, while a small dining table by the window overlooked the beach.

"This place is amazing, Elliot," Indigo said, her voice full of wonder.

Elliot chuckled, his gaze sweeping over the room.

"I figured if we're going to escape for the weekend, we might as well do it right."

He dropped his duffel bag on the floor and turned to her, a playful glint in his eyes, "Now, let's order some food. What are you in the mood for?"

"Anything, I'm not picky," She replied.

"Noted. How about pizza? We can go out for dinner tomorrow."

"Perfect!" she agreed, leaning against the table, her heart racing at the idea of a cozy dinner with him.

As Elliot placed the order, Indigo wandered to the window, the view taking her breath away.

The beach stretched out before them, the soft sand illuminated by the fading light of the day.

She could see a few couples walking hand in hand along the shore, their laughter carried by the breeze. A wave of longing washed over her—she wanted that.

She wanted the freedom to be happy, to enjoy this moment without looking over her shoulder.

A few minutes later, after ordering their pizza, Elliot slipped out, leaving Indigo to soak in the atmosphere.

She glanced around the room, taking in the little details—the soft lighting, the comfy furniture, the way the sound of the waves seemed to harmonize with her heartbeat.

It was all so perfect, and she felt a mix of anticipation and nervousness.

Indigo closed her eyes and pictured it;

Her and Janae living by the beach. Andre, too, if he wanted to. Being able to just step outside and see the ocean whenever things got tough. Building sandcastles and splashing around in the water;

Or even, being with Elliot.

The thought of her and Elliot together. Being able to do these spontanious trips, without having to hide. To be able to show more affectionate without the fear of anyone watching.

The more she thought about it, the more sad it made her.

When Elliot returned, he held up a dark bottle of wine in one hand and a bag of takeout in the other.

His eyes sparkling with mischief, "I got a bottle for two!"

She laughed, feeling her heart swell at his playful charm.

"You're spoiling me, Elly," she said, reaching for the wine as he set the takeout on the table.

"Only the best for you," he replied, his voice low as he met her gaze.

There was something in his eyes that made her stomach flutter—a promise of something deeper than just a temporary fling.

Elliot expertly uncorked the bottle, pouring two glasses before they settled at the table.

The rich aroma filled the air, intoxicating and warm, as they clinked their glasses together.

"To a weekend of freedom and fun," he said, his voice steady, "And a whole hotel room to ourselves."

"To all of that," she echoed, her heart racing as she took a sip. The wine was smooth and full-bodied, and she let out a content sigh, "This is delicious."

"Glad you like it," he said, leaning back in his chair, a satisfied grin on his face.

As they dug into the pizza, laughter and conversation flowed easily between them, the weight of their reality slipping further away.

"You know," Elliot said, wiping his mouth with a napkin, "I never thought I'd end up here with you, in a beachfront hotel, eating pizza and drinking wine. It's like a dream I never wanna wake up from."

Indigo smiled, her heart swelling.

"It feels like a dream to me too. I can't remember the last time I felt this... alive."

"Me neither."

Once the wine began to kick in, Indigo finally was able to let loose.

"So, spill— Did you always like me, or what? Have you been plotting on me since high school?" The girl laughs.

"Oh, shit," Elliot chuckles, "I mean, you were a school crush. I knew you'd never say anything to me, so I never said anything to you."

"You sang the National Anthem at graduation," Indigo adds, watching the boy's face light up.

"So, you remember me a little bit then, huh?"

"You used to have brown hair. Less tattoos. Less muscle. You only used mechanical pencils; I never brought any, and you always used to give em' out like candy," Indigo recites, having realized she did remember Elliot after doing some stalking.

"I'm happy that you remember that," Elliot says, "Like, I was starting to think I wasn't real or some shit."

"I could only imagine what you remember about me..." She sighs, "High school wasn't my finest moment."

Elliot shrugs, "You never came to class on time, but I remember you used to twirl your pencil a certain way. And you would always have a damn drink with you," He laughs, "I should've talked to you... Or maybe it's good I didn't. I didn't know Giovanni was the same kid from back then."

"Imagine how different things could've been," Indigo says softly, running her fingers across his.

Elliot paused, his expression growing serious, "You know, I didn't just bring you here for the thrill of our fling. I wanted to show you that there's more to life than... well, whatever you've been going through."

His words hung in the air, charged with unspoken emotions.

Indigo felt a lump form in her throat, the weight of his honesty hitting her like a wave.

"Elliot, I—"

Before she could finish, he leaned across the table, his hand reaching for hers.

"Indigo, can I be honest?"

She nods her head slowly, anticipating the weight of his words.

"I like you, Indy. More than I should. More than I ever planned," His voice was low, earnest, and it sent shivers down her spine.

She held his gaze, feeling a mixture of fear and exhilaration.

"I like you too," she admitted softly, feeling the truth of her words sink in. "But, I don't know how to navigate this. My life is... confusing."

"I get that," he replied, squeezing her hand gently, "But maybe we can make it less confusing. Just for tonight. Let's forget everything else and enjoy this."

The sincerity in his eyes made her heart race, and she nodded slowly, "Okay. Just for tonight."

After dinner, they moved to the balcony, the salty breeze wrapping around them like a warm embrace. The sound of the waves was soothing, and the stars began to twinkle overhead, casting a magical glow over the beach.

Elliot poured them more wine, and they settled onto the soft lounge chairs, the tension between them palpable.

"I want you to meet my family; Janae and Andre," The girl says, "They would adore you. Especially Janae, she is the sweetest little girl I've ever seen."

"I would love to meet them. How do you feel about kids?" Elliot asks as Indigo's jaw jokingly drops.

"Geez, Elly. You haven't even proposed yet!" She giggles, "For my entire life, I never wanted kids. I thought I would just be a terrible repeat of my mother... But, Janae changed that. I still have my issues, but the moments I'm with her... Everything goes away. She's my breath of fresh air. When she's sitting in my lap, when she asks me for help on her homework; I feel like I could do it."

"She sounds like a great kid."

"She's the light of my life," Indigo sighs, "How about you?"

"I want nothing more than a family. I was the same way, I thought I'd be a fucked up father, but after I graduated, I dated this girl with a kid," Elliot admits, "And it changed my outlook on it completely."

"How?"

"Well, I treated that kid like it was my own. I'd take her to school, go to her soccer games and shit, babysit and make her dinner when my ex was working late."

"Would you want a boy or a girl?"

"Either. I'd want to name my child something cool as fuck, like something with one syllable. Fox is a dope name."

Indigo's heart grew warm, hearing him talk. He never struck her as a family man, but the fact that he is, it made her only think more about their future.

"Fox? Like The X Files?" Indigo laughs.

"Fuck, yeah. I fucking love that shit."

He leaned closer, his gaze locked on hers, the air between them charged with a sweet electricity, "You know, I can't stop thinking about how incredible this is—being here with you. It feels like we're in our own little world."

"It really does," Indigo replied, her heart racing as she leaned closer.

The moment stretched out, the anticipation hanging heavy in the air. "Elliot—"

Before she could finish, he closed the distance, capturing her lips with his. The kiss was soft and tentative at first, but as she melted into him, it deepened, filled with all the unspoken feelings they had been dancing around.

The world around them faded away, leaving only the sound of the waves and the warmth of their connection.

When they finally pulled apart, breathless, Elliot rested his forehead against hers, his eyes searching hers.

"This feels right, doesn't it?" he asked softly, his thumb brushing against her cheek.

"It does. It feels too right," she whispered, feeling the truth of his words resonate within her. In that moment, she knew they were teetering on the edge of something profound; "Maybe we're more than just a fling."

"Maybe it is," he replied, a slow smile spreading across his face, "I want to fight for you, Indy. I want to be able to do this everyday, not just for a night, for a weekend..."

Indigo's heart raced at the thought.

For so long, she had been held back by fear and uncertainty, but now, in this moment with Elliot, she felt a glimmer of hope.

And Elliot rambles on, not knowing if it was the wine talking or him-- Or both.

"I don't care if I have to fuck up Gio. I don't care if he tries to kill me. I will fight for us, Indigo... It would all be worth it, if it meant I got to call you mine in the end."

"Elliot," Indigo smiles as he cuts her off, "I'm sorry, that was too much," He apologizes.

"No... No, don't be sorry. I'm willing to try," she said, her voice steady, "I want you... Us."

"I was hoping you'd say that," he replied, leaning in to kiss her again, the world around them fading as they embraced the night, the promise of what lay ahead illuminating their hearts like the stars above.

-

"I've been wanting this all day," Indigo pants as she shoves Elliot down on the bed. She wastes no time pulling his shirt off, straddling him, and leaning down to feel his lips on hers.

"I've been wanting you all week..." He smiles against her lips, "You know how hard it is for me at work?

"Is that right?" She rhetorically responds, pinning his arms down on each side of his head, "What's so hard..."

"Not being able to touch you all day, not being able to feel you on me like this... You drive me crazy, Indy."

"That's all you got?" Indigo teases.

Her hips slowly begin to move against him as he easily releases her grip on his hands, dragging them up and down her waist.

"I want to bend you over that counter everytime I see you standing behind it, babydoll."

Elliot shifted beside her, his arm instinctively wrapping around her waist, pulling her closer.

As he drew her into him, Indigo felt the beat of his heart against her back. The intimacy was electrifying.

But as his hands began to slip beneath the hem of her shirt, she remembered.

She remembered being slammed into a car door just hours earlier.

"Wait! Elliot, stop--"

But, it was too late.

Her shirt lies in Elliot's hands, revealing the large, fresh bruise on her tailbone. It was unmistakable, a fresh mark that hadn't had time to fade yet, spanning across her like a harsh reminder of something she had tried to forget.

She had hoped to keep it all hidden; To cover her wrists in bracelets. To put the heaviest foundation over any black and blues trying to make their way into the light.

But, this time... She forgot.

"Indigo... what happened?" He asked, his voice low but sharp, as if he already knew the answer but couldn't believe it.

He ran his fingers lightly over the bruise, and she winced despite trying to hide it.

She froze, every muscle in her body tensing as his words hung in the air. She didn't want to have this conversation. Not now. Not ever.

"It's nothing," She whispered, pulling the covers up to her chest as if they could shield her from the truth.

But, Elliot wasn't letting this go.

Not this time.

She could feel his eyes boring into her, searching for an answer she didn't want to give.

"Nothing?" he repeated, his voice rising slightly in disbelief, "That's not nothing, Indigo. That's a fucking bruise."

He sat up fully now, turning to face her, his hands gripping the edge of the mattress as if to keep himself steady.

"Who did this to you? Was it Giovanni?"

Indigo's heart pounded in her chest, the name sending a wave of dread crashing over her. She wanted to lie, to say something, anything, that would make this go away.

But she couldn't.

Not with Elliot looking at her like that, not with the bruise already betraying her secret.

"Yes," she whispered, her voice barely audible.

She could feel the tension building in the room, like a storm about to break.

Her breath hitched. The room felt smaller, tighter, the air too thick to breathe. She swallowed hard, avoiding his gaze.

"Elliot, it was just a one-time thing... I upset him, and you've seen his temper--"

"A one-time thing?" Elliot's voice cracked with disbelief, his anger simmering just beneath the surface.

"It's not what you think," she muttered, but the words felt hollow, even to her.

She could feel Elliot's gaze burning into her, waiting for her to say something real.

He sat up straighter, his eyes narrowing in frustration, "Not what I think? Indigo, he hit you on purpose, didn't he?"

The room suddenly felt too small, the walls closing in. She bit her lip, trying to hold it together, but the crack in her composure was widening.

"It's not like he does it all the time," she said, her voice a whisper. "He just... he was mad. Stressed about his game, his trip. It wasn't on purpose."

Elliot blinked, his expression twisting in disbelief.

"Not on purpose?" His voice was unintentionally rising now, louder, desperate for an answer that makes sense, "Are you hearing yourself?!"

The sound of his voice, the sharpness of it, made her entire body flinch.

It was reflexive, instinctual—her body responding to a threat that wasn't really there, but her mind couldn't tell the difference. She squeezed her eyes shut, her entire body trembling as fear coursed through her veins.

And Elliot saw it.

He saw the way she recoiled, the way her body shrank back like she was bracing for impact. His heart shattered in that moment, the realization hitting him harder than anything Giovanni ever could.

"Indigo..." He whispered, his voice breaking as the anger drained from his face, replaced with something softer, more fragile, "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to scare you."

But it was too late.

He reached for her, but she pulled the blanket tighter around herself, her body trembling.

"It's fine," she said quickly, her voice shaky but firm, like she was trying to convince herself more than him, "You don't have to worry about it."

"Worry about it?" His voice softened, but the disbelief remained. "Of course I'm going to worry about it. Indigo, this isn't okay, this isn't normal."

She shook her head, refusing to meet his gaze.

"It's not like he's some monster," She said quietly, "He doesn't hurt me on purpose, Elliot. He just... He gets frustrated, so fast, and things get out of hand."

Elliot stared at her, completely bewildered.

"Indigo, listen to yourself," He said, his voice thick with emotion, "You're making excuses for him. You shouldn't be saying this."

"I'm not making excuses," she protested, her voice somewhat defensive, "I know how it sounds, but it's not what you think. He's controlling, jealous--Yes--But, it's not like he hits me all the time. I've never had to go to the hospital or anything. It's not that bad."

Elliot's jaw clenched, his hands tightening into fists as he tried to contain his frustration to spare her.

"Not that bad?" he repeated, his voice quieter but full of pain, "A bruise like that... and you're telling me it's 'not that bad'?"

She looked down, her fingers twisting the edge of the blanket nervously, "Do you see why it's complicated, Elliot? This is why I don't say anything more than I already do... You just don't understand."

"Then, I beg you to help me understand, all of it," he said, his voice softer now, but still urgent, "What's it gonna take before you realize that this is wrong? How many more punches are you gonna have to take to see this isn't what love is?"

She finally looked up at him, her eyes glassy with unshed tears, "Elly, I don't have a choice," she said quietly.

"You do have a choice," Elliot whispered, leaning closer to her, "You can leave him. You don't have to stay with someone who treats you like their punching bag."

Her lip trembled as she fought to keep her emotions in check.

"I... I don't know how," she admitted, her voice breaking, "He's all I've known for so long. I don't even know what I'd do without him. I love him."

Elliot's heart ached at her words.

He wanted to shake her, make her see that she didn't need Giovanni. Not even because he, himself, has feelings for her--

But, that she could be free of this pain.

Though, he could see the fear in her eyes, the doubt that had been planted so deeply in her mind.

Elliot sighed, running a hand through his hair, clearly torn, "Love shouldn't hurt like this. It shouldn't leave marks on your body."

He reached out and gently took her hand, his thumb brushing over her knuckles.

She didn't say anything, but the tears finally spilled over, trailing down her cheeks. She didn't want to cry, didn't want to seem weak, but the dam had broken, and she couldn't stop it now.

"I just... I don't know how to leave him," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "I'm so scared, Elliot... I am so scared."

"I know you are," Elliot reached for her then, pulling her into his arms as gently as he could, as if she might break apart if he wasn't careful.

His heart ached for her, but beneath that ache was a seething rage.

How could anyone hurt her?

How could Giovanni—someone who claimed to love her—do this?

She buried her face in his chest, her tears soaking into his shirt as she let herself fall apart in his arms. She hadn't realized how much she needed this—someone to see her, to understand the pain she had been carrying alone for so long.

For a moment, Indigo let herself believe that maybe—just maybe—things could be different.

And as much as she wanted to believe in the safety and warmth of Elliot's embrace, part of her knew that the real battle was still waiting for her.

For now, though, she let herself rest, let herself be held and indugled by someone who didn't hurt her, who didn't make her feel small or broken.

And for tonight, that was enough for her.