#It's the poll I made a which S/I is best poll but none of you know anything about these three

[kakusu-shipping]

I’m making this post for me for my brain for my sorting little thinker

The Ideal Polycule is of course made up of three different Self Ships, of which have their own separate S/Is with different dynamics and personalities. I, the real human person who smooches the full polycule, am sort of the combination of the three of them.

This is just a quick summery post of them as separate S/Is and their story as it currently is in their own Universe. I don’t know how to summarize things so forgive me I’m long winded.

Does any of that make sense? No? Cool keep scrolling. If you somehow understood that and want to know more, keep reading. Uh also Spoilers for Assassination Classroom and Danganronpa

Doctor Emile Hides - Assassination Classroom

Age: 20-21

Gender: Agender - He/Him

Sexuality: Panromantic, Asexual

Self Shipped with: Koro-Sensei

Other Affiliations: Karasuma + Irina (Friends), All of class 3-E (Students)

Most Prominent Traits:

Klutzy

Comically Bad at Cooking

Still learning Japanese

Arrives Late to most everything

Classic “boy genius” trope levels of Smart

Emile came to be the stand in Nurse for class 3-E soon after their return from Okinawa, where his medical knowledge would have surely been useful during the poisoning incident. It was a decision made by Karasuma, and urged by Koro-Sensei. The kids do some dangerous stuff, they could use an on sight professional.

He is not an assassin, nor does he plan to try his hand at killing Koro-Sensei, he’s just a collage student studying abroad who was picked up by Asano as a “good enough” for E Class.

Immediately he was fascinated by Koro-Sensei, or “Koro-San” as he calls him, and began doing his best to study the unkillable teacher in between bandaging students. Emile’s focus was Biology, and he eventually filled an entire notebook with questions and drawings about Koro-Sensei and, without much thought, presented it too the teacher, asking if he’d be willing to answer them.

Koro-Sensei agreed, filling out most of the questions in the notebook.. in Kanji. Which Emile couldn’t read. He also swore the Doctor not to show the book to anyone else, which Emile had agreed too. This was Koro-Sensei’s way of helping Emile learn Japanese.

The two spent a lot of time together after that, Koro-Sensei offering to tutor Emile in Japanese after class, which eventually lead to Koro-Sensei flying Emile home most nights, as they’d study so long in the faculty room Emile would miss the last train home.

Emile eventually confesses his romantic feelings for Koro-Sensei after soon after Reaper Time, and while Koro-Sensei is hesitant for multiple reasons, the two end up an official couple, which Koro-Sensei then cannot keep to himself and blabs about to the entire class.

During Winter Break Emile stays with Koro-Sensei in the empty Class E building, and studying possible ways to keep him from self destructing. This becomes his obsession until mid February on his birthday when Koro-Sensei finally convinces him to put it down and spend what time they have left together.

Emile wasn’t on the mountain during Koro-Sensei’s final moments, he’s not an assassin, he couldn’t evade the military like the students. Instead he called Nakamura to his apartment the night the students where infiltrating the mountain and asked her to deliver to Koro-Sensei his Birthday Cake, the first successful thing Emile had ever cooked.

Post timeskip Emile has settled into being a Manga artist, rather than going fully into the Medical Field like he had been expected to with how smart he was. He joins class 3-E in cleaning up the mountain every year on Koro-Sensei’s birthday, and brings homemade sweets for them every year.

The Ultimate Collector V2 - Danganronpa 3 (Despair Arc)

Age: 16-18 (unclear)

Gender: Trans Man - He/Him

Sexuality: Frayromantic, Panromantic, Asexual

Self Shipped with: Teruteru Hanamura

Other Affiliations: The Ultimate Collector V1 (twin brother), Hifumi + Celeste Chihiro + Kazuichi + Sonia + Gundham + Chiaki (Friends)

Most Prominent Traits:

Socially Anxious to the point of occasional Mutism

Picky Eater

Comically bad sense of direction

Has everything one could ever need in his bag at all times

Very OCD and protective of his things

Emile is a very quiet, shy, introverted person who, upon being separated from his twin brother, tended to keep to himself as much as possible and blend into the background. Being an Ultimate at Hope’s Peak didn’t really matter to him, he’d preferred to stay in his room with all his things nearby.

Moving to the dorms on campus was extra hard for Emile. Despite his title as the Ultimate collector the school didn’t allow him to bring his entire collection with him. Being so far away from all his favorite things was just too much stress for Emile, causing him to shut down even more than he would have already.

Teruteru Hanamura was the only one in the class to notice Emile didn’t eat lunch and took the responsibility to keep his classmate fed into his own hands. Despite Emile’s blatant refusal to speak, he didn’t mind being spoken to, leading to Teruteru to slowly, through questions and trials and errors, to learn what things Emile could and couldn’t eat as he shared his lunch with his fellow student every day.

Teruteru got use to one sided conversations. He took pleasure in cracking a smile on Emile’s face with his jokes, or when he’d say something so awful the quiet student couldn’t stop himself from unfurling to give him a slap on the shoulder. The first time Emile had the courage to speak to Teruteru sent him over the moon.

Emile only got better through Teruteru’s friendship. Despite being easily everyone’s least favorite classmate, Teruteru was still able to worm himself and Emile into group activities, forcing the collector into social situations that slowly opened him up to the rest of the class.

The next year, when Emile’s brother joined the 78th class as The Ultimate Collector Again, Emile found himself opening up even more, mingling between both classes along with Teruteru. Even joining an anime club his brother, Hifumi, and Celeste had started. 

When the biggest most awful most tragic event in human history struck, Emile fell into Despair along side the rest of his class, but instead of becoming an ultimate despair like them, folded in on himself again, shutting down into himself, becoming an immobile shell of a person.

Teruteru ended up taking Emile with him as he caused destruction and despair throughout the world, taking care of the other like a doll. At some point, due to his new cannibalistic habits, Teruteru safely removed and ate one of Emile’s legs.

Because of this, during the hope Program, Emile was considered more of a victim than an Ultimate Despair, and was not put into the simulation with the other students, but acted as more of a beta test to see if the system could work to recover the rest of his class from despair. During the events of the game Emile watches along side Future Foundation, waiting for his friends to come back to him.

Home-Run Hero; Gumball - My Hero Academia

Age: 29

Gender: Agender - He/Him

Sexuality: Panromantic, Asexual, Polyamourus

Self Shipped with: Taishiro Toyomitsu (Fatgum)

Other Affiliations: Tamaki Amajiki + Eijiro Kirishima + Tetsutetsu Tetsutetsu + Momo Yoayorozu + Nirengeki Shoda (Adopted kids), Kendo Rappa (Taishi’s Stalker/Eventual addition to the polycule)

Quirk: Bubblegum - Gumball’s saliva has all the properties of Bubblegum. Upon being blown into a bubble, the gum will harden into a hard plastic ball, typically  around the size of a baseball.

Most Prominent Traits:

Affectionately a Bully

Extremely Agile

Will eat almost anything without question

Avid PDA offender on both Taishiro and their kids

Weak to Heat

Emile and Taishiro were classmates at Shiketsu High, their relationship started on one of annoyance, as Emile was far too touchy and nosy for Taishiro at the time. Emile sat in front of Taishiro, and took every spare moment to spin around and pester him with questions about himself, class, his quirk, the other students, and so on.

During their first sparring session, Taishiro was rather excited to have teacher’s permission to beat on the annoying kid who sat in front of him. However, due to his poor quirk management back in the day, Taishiro didn’t have near as much fat built up as he does now, and ended up on his ass at Emile’s hand multiple times.

After that, Emile was constantly offering Taishiro things to eat. Every time he turned around to talk to him in class, he’d come with something tasty and some tips on preserving fat cells. It took a while, but Taishiro eventually realized this was Emile’s attempts at being nice, in his own, slightly annoying ways, and slowly the two became real friends. Though Emile thought they were already besties.

Shiketsu is a very strict school, the students are to focus on their Hero Studies; No dating, no extra curriculars, strict curfews, ridged dorm expectations. Breaking the rules could risk immediate expulsion. But despite it all Emile ran free, broke curfew and snuck in and out whenever he pleased, typically dragging Taishiro along with him. He joined a local Baseball team without the school’s permission, and invited Taishiro to all his games. He had sleep over’s in his classmate’s rooms, and slept in the common area, and his contraband all throughout the dorms. The only rule he hadn’t actively broken was no dating.

Taishiro, slowly, found himself being thankful for that, because if that rule wasn’t in place, he’d asked Emile out right then and there. And if he’d found out his friend was dating someone, or asked someone out, Taishiro wasn’t sure his heart would ever recover.

Upon becoming Pro Heroes, Emile and Taishiro went their separate ways for a while. Emile falling more into the “Idol Hero” roll, as he joined a professional Quick Baseball League, where as Taishiro kept their high school streak of rule breaking alive and became an Undercover Hero breaking up fight clubs and chasing drug dealers under the radar. This is where most of their 20′s were spent.

They kept well in touch, back and forth whenever their schedules lined up, which was rare and always brief. Taishiro got better at saving up fat for his quirk, Emile became more and more of a heavy hitter, they grew older and wiser from their high school days of breaking out of the dorms at night, and eventually Emile confessed to Taishiro.

Soon after he joined the Fatgum agency, still playing Clean Up hitter for his own Baseball League, but mostly slowing down steadily into Hero Work, and apparently parenting as the Fatgum agency gains more and more interns every year.

[amourdivine]

💜 𝐃𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐘 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐅𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐄 ♡ 𝑭𝑬𝑨𝑻𝑼𝑹𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑬𝑿𝑻𝑬𝑵𝑫𝑬𝑫 18+ 𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑰𝑵𝑮 ♡

Hello lovelies! I hope you’re doing well today! Today, I bring you a different type of reading featuring an extended 18+ version. Since the extended reading option was the winner of my latest poll, I am really happy and excited to release this. Thank you so much for your endless support, I love you guys very much and I hope you’re having a wonderful week! ♡

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none of the images are mine unless stated otherwise

how to choose your pile.  take deep breaths for a few minutes & look at each and every one of the piles separately. see which one brings you to a feeling, a place or a memory. take your time and feel free to come back to it later.

♡ ♡ ♡     pick a card masterlist & information

disclaimer. this is a general reading for entertainment purposes. tarot is a divination tool & is not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i do not take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings.

amourdivine. 2021 - 2023 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

PILE 001 | DAY VERSION

judgement • page of wands • nine of cups • two of cups

Scorpio energy here - either one of you may have Scorpio in 6th, a stellium the 6th or perhaps you’re Pluto dominant. It’s a significant planet here. Your love for one another on a day-to-day basis will shine through in the way you handle the adversities thrown your way, how you wake up each day with excitement and gratitude for what’s to come. It may have been difficult for the two of you to finally come together, but I see two people waking up with extreme gratitude for getting to be with one another. It’s honestly quite sweet, you’ll feel as if all the roads have led you to this person, to spend your life with them in the big and the small moments.

The love will be shown in the stressful moments, hand holding when one’s having a crisis, calming down one another and facing the challenges together. For example, if you’re regularly waking up to nightmares, your person will calm you down, they’ll accompany you to a doctor’s appointment and do their best to ensure you have good dreams.I heard “through thick and thin” - you’ll be doing and planning everything together. You’ll be in sync, so if one’s doing the groceries, the other will be picking up the kids from school. It has a feeling of telepathy to it, like your thoughts and emotions will be picked up on by the other. It’ll be a very teammate-y kind of couple, the couple that does not let the other go without support. You’ll be very present in each other’s day to day lives and there’s an element of fun to it as well, of trying to keep things lighthearted and romantic as well, like going on weekly dates, making sure to lighten up each other’s mood, check in often and give keep the love alive through these small gestures, consistently.

Speaking of consistently, that’s how I envision your daily life with your FS, through constant commitment, effort, gifts and displays of affection. Your relationship will be a safe foundation for your daily lives, regardless of what happens, it will be so present that you won’t ever feel alone or doubt your FS’s love for you.

channeled song: Colors of Your Mood by Between Giants.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE NIGHT VERSION: YOUR 18+ LIFE.

PILE 002 | DAY VERSION

the sun • seven of wands • four of cups • the empress

Your daily life will have a lot of happy, positive elements. A lot of Leo and Libra here. You’ll make one another laugh a lot, cheer each other up. This person may be or may have been your best friend. I see an element of “inner child” here, a lot of dancing, giggling and nurturing one another. In your daily life, your person may help you stand your ground and you’ll be each other’s biggest cheerleader. Compliments and cheeky ways of flirting are ways where you’ll keep the flame alive, fighting together for a better future as well - you’ll stand up for one another a lot. If someone treats you poorly, like say, you’re walking by and you get catcalled or someone disrespects you at a grocery shop line, your person will say something. You’ll also naturally take on this role as well, because you’ll want to spoil one another a lot and fight to keep your love “young”. Perhaps family members or loved ones will be opposed to this relationship and the both of you will feel the need to prove everyone wrong, to show that you’re each other’s person and it’s the final say. 

You will fight off the boredom of routine by keeping everything interesting and unusual. You may travel a lot with one another before having kids or prioritize your relationship’s success and joy above everything else. Even if the two of you don’t have much money, I feel like you’ll be very creative and come up with different ideas to spark up your joy. Both of you may intensely dislike routine or boredom, so you’ll make sure that neither one of you is left unattended, unsatisfied or lonely. I also feel that either one of you may have slightly jealous tendencies towards the other, so it’ll be important for the two of you to never leave it unaddressed or dismissed, but I think it’ll be mostly harmless and may make one of you pouty, which the other will find cute. I see a lot of spoiling here, not just material, like I mentioned, but showering each other in love every single day, especially through words of affirmation and a lot of cuddling. This is the pile of the clingy, obsessed-with-each-other couple. Quite adorable, to be honest. You won’t be afraid of the PDA.

Random message, but if you have any motherly or love wounds, I think you’ll be able to heal through the love you receive from this person on a day to day basis. As if you’ll come at ease and your heart will finally rest once the days pass you by and you realize your marriage is not like your parents”.

channeled song: Chateau by Angus & Julia Stone.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE NIGHT VERSION: YOUR 18+ LIFE.

PILE 003 | DAY VERSION

the hermit • queen of wands • ace of pentacles • seven of cups

Your daily life will be busy in the pursuit of better opportunities. I think this person will encourage you to be your most authentic self with them. They’ll make you feel confident and in your power. This pile is giving me “power couple” vibes, like two people who own a business together and work tirelessly to make their dreams come true. It may be hard for you two to distinguish between one person’s dreams vs. the other, since you’ll both have very similar goals that will be aligned in the way you make choices. Your daily life together seems to be one full of really important decisions; you’re both perfectionists - and sometimes you’ll need each other’s push to simply do something instead of striving for perfection. I heard “done is better than perfect”. I also think you’ll both pursue a lot of intellectual stimuli together, maybe go to the movies or the theater together, museums and libraries. It seems that your daily lives will be very private, exclusive to the two of you, you may be the couple who doesn’t post much on social media but the people speak of a lot. I get the feeling you’re both important people, as I mentioned.

You may be in the public eye in some way. I’m guessing it has to do with your occupations. You can count on each other to only speak the best of one another. I think you and your FS will have a deep sense of loyalty and commitment that will naturally bleed into your day-to-day interactions and conversations. You’ll be the couple who plans the smallest of things together. It’s possible the two of you have similar placements or complementary ones, because the synastry here seems very easygoing, like it just flows naturally and two people are very committed to making it work, regardless. Even on a day-to-day basis, you’ll have interesting topics to talk about and you may be the kind of couple who ask each other’s opinions for everything, not out of codependency, but because they know that their FS has always something interesting to say. I see you spending time together in a more “lowkey” way. Your ways of demonstrating love to one another will be subtle but thoughtful, perhaps only noticeable to the two of you, almost like you’ve developed a secret language to speak to one another. You will get each other like no one else. Very clever and sweet. 

channeled song: Cardigan by Taylor Swift.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE NIGHT VERSION: YOUR 18+ LIFE.

PILE 004 | DAY VERSION

two of cups • four of wands • two of pentacles • ace of swords

Most of your day-to-day lives will be spent maintaining and looking after your stability, pile four. Regardless of how many times I shuffled, messages about money kept coming out. I think it’s possible you’ll either marry into wealth or become fairly wealthy after marriage and I feel like most of your routine will revolve around making healthy financial decisions with your FS. I think the two of you will be very, very protective over your family. Another message I got was about children, I think you’ll have plenty of them. It’s coming on very strongly that you’re possibly having big family - like three to five children, if that resonates for you, of course. I see it as a bit of a chaotic, but pleasant daily life regardless. Even if you’re busy looking after all that you have, I think you’ll aim to leave a good legacy behind and that will show early on in your marriage. You’ll be concerned about making good choices not only for the now, but for the future as well. You’re both very smart, witty people. I feel like you may also have a joint bank account, or some other way of holding each other accountable and looking after your material gains. I don’t see any “controlling” behavior here, but more so two people who are enthusiastic about how far they’ve come and how far they can go.

You’re both super hard workers as well. Honestly, it’s possible you may not spend as much time with them as you want to, but I think even when you’re away for a few hours, running errands or working, you’ll miss them. It’s got a feeling of two people who have never fallen out of love. I think you’ll be smitten with them for a very, very long time. I think you’ll also become an example of a healthy couple for your children as well. I’m sorry children are coming up so strongly (lol), but the energy of being busy, loving parents here is very obvious to me. You might become overwhelmed or overburdened by responsibilities at times, because I see here two people who sort of thrive in chaotic or busy environments and at times, you may have to delegate tasks or ask other family members for help. I think either one of you has always dreamt of building a big family and now that you have it, you want to do everything in your power to protect it, to cherish it. One or both of you is a natural provider and wants to give your loved ones all the best things in the world. 

channeled song: Still The One by Shania Twain.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE NIGHT VERSION: YOUR 18+ LIFE.

amourdivine. 2021 - 2023 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

[scribblesofagoonerr]

It's only up from here now on, kid

Since this one won in the poll that I put out, here it is ✌🏼

Thank you so much @alotofpockets for the help with this post!

Let me know what you all think & I hope you like it.

Ps. It's almost 2 am and I'm tired so I apologise if the last bit of this doesn't make much sense at all... 🫠

“It’s going to be fine, remember?” Beth tries her best to reassure you as she takes a gentle hold of your hand on her own, “Just breathe, you’re okay” she adds.

“I’m scared” You admit, barely louder than a whisper.

Viv glances at you and smiles at you sympathetically from the seat opposite, “It’s normal to feel like you do, kleintje” she tells you.

“We’re going to be right here for you the whole time” Beth promises you as she moves her free arm to wrap it around your shoulder and tug you in a little bit closer, “We’re not leaving you” she states in reassurance.

It was unfortunate for you that the day of your planned surgery came around quicker than you initially would’ve liked and you couldn’t avoid it any longer now.

The way that your uninjured knee bounced up and down anxiously and your hands that were ridiculously clammy was a clear indication of actually how worried and scared you were about this.

Both Beth and Viv could tell straight away that you were beginning to freak out the moment that you had stepped into the waiting room; You’d always hated hospitals, there was just something about them that made you always try and avoid them when it was possible.

However, this surgery wasn’t something that you could just brush under the carpet, because it was important and it was needed if you wanted to continue with your career.

Initially you thought the hardest thing that you would have to face would be dealing with the aftermath of it all, listening to the media drone on about how this injury would rule you out the rest of the current season and any international breaks for the next 9 months, like you didn’t already need enough of a reminder about your dream of the olympics being over.

It was like a virtual kick in the teeth.

You hated the fact you were sidelined from the games and despite how much you had the support of Beth, Viv, Laura, Leah and hell even the rest of the girls, it still hurt to deal with it all.

Even Kyra’s mischievous ways couldn’t put a smile on your face most days, nor the adorable puppy cuddles from Myle, Beth & Vivs’ new pup that you’d completely fallen in love with.

“Is it too late to just turn around and go back home?” You can’t help but wonder, glancing around the hospital waiting room apprehensively.

Beth lets out a small laugh, “We can’t do that kiddo, we’re already here now” she replies to your question.

Pouting quietly, you fumble with your hands which has become a trait that you’d do when you're nervous, “I… I don’t want to be here. I’m scared” you confess.

“I know kiddo, but you have nothing to be worried about” The blonde tells you in reassurement, doing her best to ease your worries about your feelings of the upcoming surgery, “The surgeons are good, they know what they're doing here” she reminds you.

“They have done it enough times” Viv chips in quietly, earning a small chuckle from Beth.

“I hate hospitals” You complain a few seconds later.

“I know that you do, kiddo” Beth smiles at you sympathetically, all but wishing that she could take your pain and suffering away.

It had hurt Beth and Viv so much to see you go down on the pitch in the way that you did, they’d not openly had a conversation about it but it was definitely understood that they shared mutual feelings about the whole situation.

None of it was fair for you, you were on the path to succeed and just like that, this cruel injury has wiped that all away in just a blink of an eye.

Life really was cruel sometimes.

“Can you… Can you run me through it again, please? Just so I remember what’s going to happen” You mumble quietly, but still loud enough for the two women to hear you ask the question, “Please” You whisper, sounding unusually vulnerable compared to usual.

“Okay” Beth exhales a sigh, she’d already run over the whole procedure of what would happen at least twice, or maybe even three times previously, but if it eased your own worries than she’d do what she could to help you out, “You want me to run you through the procedure, or the whole of it in general?” she wonders.

“All of it” You whisper, fumbling with the strings of yours– Laura’s hoodie that you had somehow stolen from her but you liked the way that it buried you and made you feel small enough to try and escape the world.

The blonde nods in understanding before she starts to explain it once more, “So in the next hour or so from now, your names’ going to be called and you’ll be taken to the room that you’ll be in before your operation” she pauses for a minute to let you catch up to speed, “You’ll have a hospital gown to change into that they’ll give you when you go into the room along with a pair of them snazzy socks, huh? So you just be able to pull the look off” she jokes with you, trying to keep the conversation light and jokey to avoid you getting any further worried.

“Nobody can pull a look like that off, well other than Leah I suppose” You mumble as you giggle slightly at the comment.

“Well she can pull anything off” Viv chuckles, shaking her head amusedly as she tries to bury her own feelings down to not have you feel any more scared than you need to be.

“Even a bin bag” Beth jokes with you both, “Alright, so your surgery isn’t until 4 o’clock, remember? So you’re going to have to wait a bit, but we’ll be right in the room with you to keep you company, up until the minute you go down” she adds.

You follow along and nod, somehow Beth running through everything again does a little something to settle your bubbling nerves, “What happens after that?” you ask.

“Before you go down to the operating room, there will be an anaesthetist that will come and see you beforehand to discuss the options of anaesthetic before you go down” The blonde tells you, pausing for you to quickly catch up on the last bit of information, “Remember how we spoke about the anaesthetist inserting a cannula into your vein as well? They’ll do that, so they’ll be able to administer any medicine that’s needed during the operation” she tells you.

“Will the cannula hurt?” You start to panic once more, you were vaguely familiar with the fact that a cannula was a sharp needle that would be painful and you absolutely hated needles.

“It will be just like a sharp string, but it’ll be over soon enough” Viv is quick to tell you when she notes the panic in your eyes, they both definitely knew how much you hated anything medically, and they’d definitely experienced their fair share of dealing with your panic attacks when you’ve needed any type of injections in the past, “They’ll give you the anaesthetic that’ll put you to sleep” she adds.

“Will it be a n… needle?” You absolutely hate needles, you’re terrified of them and every single doctor's experience in the past had always been disastrous ever since you were little.

“You won’t feel it initially, kleintje” Viv tells you as she places a gentle hand on your uninjured knee to stop it bouncing anxiously, “You’ll have a cannula in your hand. When you're down in the operating room, the anaesthetist will ask you to count backwards from 10 while they administer it and before you even get to finish, you’ll be completely out of it so they can begin the operation” she explains to you.

You slump your shoulders as you feel slightly more at ease, “Oh, okay then. That… That doesn’t sound too bad then” You mumble, swallowing the lump that forms in your throat, “So the doctors will know what they’re doing?”

“They do, they have done it enough times” Beth says as she lightly chuckles.

“And when I wake up from surgery then Leah and Laura will be here as well, right?” You ask hopeful, after all they’d both told you that they would be and you hoped that they wouldn’t break their promise.

“Yes, they have both promised that they will be here” Beth replies in agreement.

Smiling slightly, you nod in agreement with the blonde, “They can’t break the promise then, can they?” You quietly ask, fumbling with the strings again.

“No they can't, otherwise they’ll face a very unhappy girl after surgery” The blonde jokes, ruffling your hair, which earns a small grumble of protest from you.

“Feel less nervous now?” Viv questions, hopeful that you did feel at ease a little bit.

“A little bit, but I really hate hospitals” You huff in annoyance, shaking your head, “And I really hate stupid knees’ as well” You mumble quietly.

Beth can’t help but snort amusedly, “Don’t we all, kiddo… Don’t we all, hey?” she jokes, still trying to keep the conversation light still.

“Okay, we’re going to take you down now, Y/N” The surgeon tells you once they’ve finished spieling all of the medical jargon, which you didn’t really listen to too much.

When they placed the cannula, you can’t deny that it didn’t hurt. There were a few tears in your eyes, but you consider yourself to be mostly brave in comparison to not freaking out about it.

“O… Okay” You swallow the nervous lump in your throat that had formed, the nerves settling in once again.

Beth takes a gentle hold of your own when she can sense your worries, “Don’t be scared, kiddo. You’re in great hands” she reassures you, or at least tries to do that.

“We’ll be right here waiting for you when you come back” Viv chips in, trying to contain her own fears and worries in favour of yours.

You glance between them wearily, “Y… You promise?” You question in fear, although you know that of course they’ll be sat waiting in the room for you and they wouldn’t let you go through this on your own.

“We promise” Beth replies in agreement.

“We promise, kleintje” Viv adds in.

“Love you both” You tell them, it’s barely louder than a whisper but both women are able to hear it and smile at you fondly.

“We love you too, kleintje” Viv tells you, placing a light kiss on the top of your head.

Beth smiles and swaps places with Viv to be closer to you, “We love you so much, our wonder kid” she tells you, kissing the top of your head again, “We’ll be right here when you come back. We’re not going anywhere” she adds.

The very single second that you left the hospital room with the surgeons, it was like Viv completely fell apart trying to hold it together any longer now you weren’t there, constantly pacing the floor in the hospital room up and down as Beth watched her girlfriend, worriedly.

“Viv, you’re pacing the floor so much. You might put a dent in it” Beth jokes lightly, furrowing her eyebrows as she watches in concern as her girlfriend get worked up

“I know, I can’t help it” Viv admits as she still continues to pace the floor, not pausing to take a breath or speak to her girlfriend, 

“I think you might be more nervous than Y/N was before she went down” Beth jokes, trying to keep the mood in the room light.

“I am nervous for Y/N” Viv admits quietly, just loud enough for her girlfriend to be able to hear what she said.

Beths’ facial expression softens in realisation at just how worried Viv actually was about you and your impending surgery, “Why didn’t you tell me?” she asks.

“BecauseI was trying to be strong for Y/N, she was scared enough without seeing me to fall to pieces” Viv explains to the blonde, shaking her head and still continuing to pace the floor, “You’re not worried for her?” she asks.

“Of course, I am nervous for her but I’m trying to be brave for her and put my feelings aside” Beth replies to the Dutch womans’ question, “I know it’s hard to keep it all in though. You know that she’s going to be okay though” she tells her.

Viv exhales a sigh and shakes her head, “I’m trying, but it’s so hard and she’s still so young. None of this is fair, Beth” she mumbles.

“I know, leifje” Beth mumbles in agreement before she exhales a sigh herself.

“This is her first major surgery. You saw how scared she looked before, I just can’t help but be worried right now” Viv states, still pacing the floor continuously.

Beth frowns and moves to step in front of her girlfriend to stop any further pacing, “Viv, leifje. I know you’re worried for her but you know that the surgeons here are good and you know that she’s in safe hands” she does her best to reassure her girlfriends’ own fears.

Viv halts from her continuous pacing and exhales a loud sigh, “I know, and I know that too as well but I still can’t be less worried about her until I see her” she confesses.

“That might still be a while yet though, so how about we just sit down?” The blonde suggests, gesturing to the empty chairs in the room, “This pacing isn’t healthy either” she notes.

“What if something goes wrong?” Viv questions in concern.

“Viv, Y/N/N is going to be fine” Beth still tries to reassure her girlfriend, gently pulling her towards the empty chairs, “She’s going to be so brave” she tells her.

“But what if–” Vivs’ question is cut off.

“Viv, leifje” Beth interjects with a soft smile, “Listen, I know you’re worried but there’s nothing that we can do to control this right now. Y/N is in safe hands with the medical professionals, remember?” she reminds her girlfriend.

“You’re right, I know you are but what if–” Viv starts to speak again.

“Vivianne, all that we can do right now is sit down and wait” Beth cuts in, holding her girlfriends’ hand in her own, “I’m just as worried about her as you are, but all of this pacing the floor isn’t going to help ease your worries nor mine, so please just come and sit down” she tells her girlfriend gently.

“Okay” The Dutch woman nods in agreement and moves to sit down beside her girlfriend.

Beth smiles at the woman and joins her to sit down, “Thank you. Y/N/N is going to be okay, she’s our strong girl” she states, trying to remain positive for the both of them.

“We’re here!” Laura announces, rushing into the hospital room as fast as she could without injuring herself again.

“We made it here, finally. Traffic was a nightmare on the way here” Leah follows the younger girl in, shaking her head, disgruntled by the typical London traffic that made her get stuck in the middle of rush-hour traffic.

“You both made it here, that’s the main thing” Beth breathes a sigh of relief that she’d been holding in for a while, glad that both of them had made it to the hospital before you came back from surgery.

“The room was a little hard to find. Hospitals always confuse me still” Laura mumbles, moving to sit down in an empty seat in your hospital room.

“Baby England still down in surgery?” Leah questions, settling into the seat Laura.

“Yes” Viv exhales a sigh.

“They took her down around 4 pm, so hopefully it won’t be much longer now” Beth hopes as she takes a quick glance at the time on her phone, apprehensive to mention anything about complications in case that would make Viv panic all over again.

“Gotcha” Leah nods in understanding, glancing between the couple, “How’re you both holding up?” she checks in with them.

Beth can’t help but chuckle slightly, “Well I think Viv’s been a lot more nervous about this than I was led to believe, so it seems like I’m just trying to hold it together for the two of us at this point now” she jokes with the blonde, mock-teasing her girlfriends’ need to worry so much.

“Hey, Y/N is like our own kid. You’re just as worried about her as I am!” Viv insists firmly, shaking her head at her blonde girlfriend.

“I am worried, leifje” Beth responds in agreement, taking a gentle hold of her girlfriends’ hand in her own.

Leah chuckles slightly and shakes her head, “The rest of the girls all send their love, they’d be here as well but they didn’t want to crowd her too much. Steph had to pull Kyra back from her trying to get in my car to join us” she adds in, amusedly.

“We can invite them around when Y/N/N is up for visitors” Viv suggests, trying to chat now to distract any more nervous thoughts about you. Beth was right, you were in safe hands and there was nothing that she could do to change what happens in the operating room.

Beth smiles and nods in agreement, “I’m sure she’d like that” she states.

It felt like several more hours had passed before you finally made an appearance in the room, fast asleep still from the general anaesthetic that you’d been given.

“Here she is” Leah cheers quietly as she spots you still asleep  as they wheel your bed back into the hospital room.

“Surgery went well?” Viv checks in with the surgeon.

“Surgery went very well” The surgeons beams a wide smile in agreement with the woman.

Given the general post-op run down from the surgeons, they left the room and the ACL crew were now just waiting for you to wake up and come back around from the anaesthetic, which wasn’t too long afterwards thankfully.

“Ah, look whos’ finally woken up” Beth jokes when she sees your eyes prise open, “Hello sleepy head” she adds.

You groan as you come around from the slumper you were previously in, feeling slightly disoriented about things, “Ugh. Where am I?” You mumble, not completely aware of your surroundings yet.

“You’re in hospital, Y/N” Beth chuckles slightly and shakes her head, “Did you bang your head down there, huh? We’re all here for you, just like we said” she motions around the room the 4 familiar faces.

“Mhm, oh yeah. Had knee surgery-- Le, you're here, you came!” You mumble in realisation as you squint your eyes and look round the room, spotting Leah and Laura along with Beth and Viv, who had been strangely quiet still since you’d woken up.

"Ahem, I'm here too, you know?" Laura chips in, amusingly.

"Laur! You're here too!" You exclaim in realisation, excited to see the older girl, "Can I go home now?" You ask, eager to get out of the hospital as you thought you had already been here long enough.

“Whoa easy there, let’s just take it slow, huh? There’s no rush” Beth replies, laughing amusedly as she watches you try and climb out of the hospital bed, still very much under the anaesthetic so you couldn’t feel how much pain you were really in.

You can’t help but pout in disappointment, “My own beds’ more comfier than this one though” you note.

Leah can't help but chuckle amusedly, "Glad to see that you've not lost your sense of humour, baby England" she teases you lightly.

"Le!" You exclaim in glee, so high still from the anaesthetic that you forgot she was here again and you are just so happy to see her again, "You're here!" You add in joy.

"I am. I promised you that I would be here, didn't I?" The blonde defender laughs in amusement at your own expense, "It's nice to see that you're in the land of the living now, eh?" she still continues to tease you.

The second that you lie your eyes on Viv, it only takes a few seconds before the floodgate of tears is opened as you stare at her in shock, before you giggle slightly.

"Seriously, Vivi? You told me to not be worried yet here you are, balling your eyes out" You can't help but laugh hysterically, mostly from the anaesthetic making you feel so loopy, "This whole time you've been so worried yourself!" You add in.

Beth chuckles and shakes her head amusedly, "Oh kiddo, she's been beside herself with worry" she tells you as she gently squeezes you on the shoulder, "Remember now, it's only up from here now on, kid" she tells you.

"It's only up from here now on" You parrot the blonde in agreement, happy enough to be closer to leaving that dreaded hospital.

© scribblesofagoonerr

[whoreviewswho]

Your Evil is My Good - Pyramids of Mars, 1975

There are some things, though not many, that the Doctor Who fandom seems to universally agree on. Everybody seems to agree that the Weeping Angels are a great, iconic monster. Everybody seems onboard with the notion that The Caves of Androzani is one of the best stories of all time. Everybody seems to agree that the Hinchcliffe era is one of the most consistently good runs in the whole show. You can probably see where I am going with this. Pyramids of Mars has been forever lauded as one of the all-time great Doctor Who stories, a shining example of a show that appealed to all ages at the peak of its powers. 

Like all consensus opinions, there is obviously a clear logic to this. Pyramids of Mars is incredibly memorable and influential. It was, after all, the third serial to be released on the VHS line and it topped the DWM poll for most anticipated DVD release in 2003. Even if it were not so formative and prominent in fan's minds (the amount of times it has been selected for re-release and repeat is remarkable) it would still be one of the most influential and groundbreaking stories of its time. It is hard to challenge the claim that Pyramids of Mars is the single most important story of the Hinchcliffe era. Not the best (there are at least four prior to this that could more readily stake that claim) but, in an aesthetic sense, the pilot episode for the Hinchcliffe era or, at least, the one where everything finally falls into place.

Prior to Pyramids of Mars, Doctor Who had functioned primarily based on the approach pioneered by Verity Lambert and David Whittaker back in the early 1960s. Their vision of Doctor Who was as a programme defined by juxtaposing aesthetics and the storytelling had developed to facilitate that by colliding genres and styles of storytelling. What debuts in Pyramids of Mars is, in hindsight, the inevitable next step which is positioning the established aesthetics and logic of Doctor Who alongside specific pulp genre stories. The difference is the distinction between the Doctor walking amongst a space opera or a western and disrupting their logics and aesthetics and the Doctor walking around within 1971’s Blood of the Mummy’s Tomb and being beholden to its logic and aesthetic. 

In the 1990s, Steven Moffat infamously derided the Hinchcliffe era for comprising too largely of derivative pastiches and, while I ultimately agree with him, he is made to look a bit of a fool because of how much the approach does actually work. I like Pyramids of Mars. Of course I do. I'm a Doctor Who fan. This story is a blast to watch and it is the first in a really strong run of pulpy, gothic horror-pastiches that define the Hinchcliffe era in everybody's minds (I stress this is not the beginning of a run in terms of quality, just the start of an aesthetic period that also happens to be very good). This is a messy story but it is a very promising first showing. Pyramids of Mars proves that this model of Doctor Who can work and it lays the groundwork for better stories later down the track. after it to take this aesthetic and run into incredibly interesting places. So, as you have obviously concluded by now, this is not even close to my favourite of the Hinchcliffe era, let alone of all time. 

Yes, the production of Pyramids of Mars is spectacular. Probably the single strongest aspect of the Hinchcliffe era is just how good the show was at working within its limitations. None of the stories under his watch look especially naff and Pyramids of Mars is especially luscious. The serial is dripping in tone and atmosphere and I could not begrudge anybody frequenting it for just the mood it puts you in. The sets for the house are great and effortlessly evoke that classic, hammer horror tone of an old, creepy house with creepy old dudes doing creepy *cult* (we can replace that word with *casually stereotypically racist*) stuff. The visual effects are also excellent with particular kudos to that chilling bit where Marcus gets shot. I could watch that one sequence forever. 

This is not a script with a wealth of great material for the actors but there is no question that they are all exceptional. Paddy Russell even claimed as much herself, insisting upon finding strong actors to bolster material that she thought was lacking. Michael Sheard brings a lot to Laurence Scarman, the best part in the whole story from an acting perspective, but it is hard to look past Garbriel Woolf as Sutekh for the best guest performance in the serial. What a captivating voice and commanding presence. Tom Baker's performance is often praised for the seriousness and dread he brings to proceedings. He even has some particularly dark and alien moments such as his total detachment from the various deaths around him. In my opinion, however, I find his performance to be distant and disinterested, likely thanks to his frosty relationship with Russell. Luckily, it does serve this material well and offer an alienness to the role but he seems incredibly bored and pissed off every time he is onscreen.

As with this whole season though, Elisabeth Sladen is at the height of her powers and effortlessly wrings buckets of charm out of scripts that, again, serve her terribly. Following season eleven, it feels like nobody working on the show has any interest or even a take on the Sarah Jane that we were introduced to. Everybody who has ever seen this serial praises the scene where the Doctor leaves the events of the story for 1980 at Sarah's request and rightly so because it is a phenomenal sequence and possibly the most effective way to demonstrate how awesomely powerful the villain is in the whole show’s history. It's so good, of course, that Russell T. Davies had the good sense to nick it wholesale for The Devil's Chord. Everything aesthetically about Pyramids of Mars works. This is a great story to just watch and let wash over you. 

However, I think that this script is deeply flawed and definitely needed another pass before it could attain true GOAT status in my books. Perhaps that will seem unfair to those who will cry out in defence with the reminder that  this story was another late rewrite from Robert Holmes when the original scripts, from one time writer Lewis Griefer, were deemed unworkable. It is somewhat miraculous that this story even got made at all. It’s difficult to say now how much of the finished serial can truly be credited to whom. Greifer, was approached by Holmes, a former colleague, while headhunting new talent. Knowing he had a keen interest in Egyptian mythology, Holmes allegedly pitched the combination of science-fiction and a mummy horror film to him. Greifer’s scripts would have been radically different including the proposed final appearance of UNIT and the Brigadier, a scheme to solve world hunger with plantations on the moon year culminated in the Doctor uniting with Horus and Iris to take on the crocodile looking Seth and stop his plan to replace the grain and destroy the moon. It is from here that the development of the serial becomes very collaborative. Holmes met with Greifer and suggested a number of scaled-back alterations that were more in-line with what Doctor Who was suited to in 1976 as well as taking on suggestions from outgoing producer Barry Letts. 

Greifer revised his scripts further to what would be the basic plot of the television version, moving the detecting to Earth with an imprisoned Seth and his rocket-based plans, with the added addition of a fortune hunter seeking the world-saving rice in an ancient Egyptian tomb. Holmes remained unhappy with the scripts and, to make matters worse, Greifer fell ill after delivering a full script for the first episode only. Following his recovery, Greifer then promptly left the UK to take on a job her previously committed to leaving Holmes to do a page one rewrite with the consultation of director Paddy Russell based on what had already been put in motion. With all of this fraught pre-production in mind, I still think this story is an undercooked mess. The first episode is fantastic and I really love the third but there is so much padding in episodes two and four that really drag the whole thing down for me. The entire second episode is just spent cutting between Sutekh killing people and the Doctor setting up a plan to stop him that fails immediately: The foundations of this serial are really strong and it has some great dialogue, characters and moments but the whole thing fails to hold together for me especially in regards to pacing and the real lack of any interesting subtext to sink your teeth into. There is not much to love here that is not aesthetic.

But let's try and dig a little deeper anyway. Broadly speaking, mortality seems to be the theme that connects the various elements of the story. We are first introduced to the Doctor in what is probably my single favourite shot of him in the whole seven years he was in the show. We meet him alone, in silence and brooding in the TARDIS control room. Sarah enters in what will be a coincidentally appropriate Edwardian dress, our first indicator that this story is really all about aesthetics and flavour more than anything else, and we discover that the Doctor is in somewhat of a mid-life crisis, grappling with the uncomfortable realisation that his life is marching on and that he has no real purpose. This is a really well written and performed scene, one of the best the Doctor and Sarah ever had, and probably my favourite of the serial. While the original show on the whole is not know for deftness of characterisation and development, Pyramids of Mars proposes a potentially interesting starting place for the Doctor’s character which is simply to put him in a somewhat depressed mood and unhappy with the prospect of spending his remaining days at U.N.I.T.‘s beck and call. This a Doctor who has lost his sense of purpose and ambition. It is a great idea that could reveal a lot about the Doctor and challenge his character, as we later saw under Moffat's creative direction, but it never goes anywhere here. Pyramids of Mars is a serial about a villain who does have a defined purpose and ambition – to bring death to all of reality. Yet the person best poised to stop him is in a crisis himself about the prospect of that very thing arriving for him. The character-driven story of a wandering hero in a mid-life crisis versus the Lord of Death should simply write itself.

But it doesn't. The Doctor does not walk away from the end of this adventure with a renewed sense of self or really any semblance of change in the morose feelings he expresses in episode one. It would have been perfectly forgivable if his mid-life crisis was something that the production team set-up here and went on to develop over the season but that never happens either. The Doctor is more than happy to assist U.N.I.T. in the very next serial and yet once more before the season wraps up. The elements are all here to ie the themes and character beats together but it never really happens. For example, I would love to confidently read something deeper into the final visual of the house burning down. It is, after all, the Doctor’s defeat of Sutekh that starts the fire and we know from episode one that, later down the track, the manor is going to be rebuilt and repurposed as the U.N.I.T. headquarters.

The thematic implications of this are really nice. Sutekh wants to end everything, leaving "nothing but dust and darkness", but we all know that the manor's destruction is an ultimately necessary consequence to allow for something good to rise up from its ashes. Life always prevails and begins anew. This is a simple enough thematic beat that could have been teased out and made a lot stronger and it could even have been a clear indicator of some character resolution. With the Doctor inadvertently facilitating the conception of U.N.I.T., this whole image could represent his coming to terms with his place in the universe after combatting Sutekh and passionately redefining himself and coming to terms with a now mythic role as a defender of all life in the universe, a champion of change and renewal. It is something almost there in the script but not quite.

The use of Egyptian iconography in this story is very clever. We know that death was an incredibly important aspect of their culture. People's corpses were mummified to preserve them for the afterlife since death was very much believed not to be the end. There is some cool world-building in this story and I really like the idea that Egyptian culture is all founded upon the wars of the Osirans (Osiris being the Egyptian god of the dead and of fertility). Sutekh is directly mentioned as being the inspiration for Set, realised as well as one could expect in his final beastly form, and the whole premise of the story is hinging upon his previous eternal imprisonment at the hands of brother Horus. I love that the bringer of death is punished by having an eternally unlived life. I think that this context is intended to be paralleled with Marcus and Lawrence. The pair are brothers and, for most of the story, the former literally is Sutekh.

Or, in another sense, it might be helpful to take the Doctor’s advice and consider Marcus as already dead. That plays nicely into the broader subtext we are reaching for here of exploring different relationships with death. Lawrence is in denial of his brother’s death since he sees him walking, talking and breathing. The Doctor thinks otherwise, confidently claiming Marcus to be dead already and no longer Lawrence’s brother now that his mind has been overtaken. We should note the Doctor and Sarah’s later scene too where she expresses a lot of sorrow over Lawrence’s death while the Doctor more or less just shrugs, if anything he comes off mildly annoyed, and refuses to deviate from the bigger priority of stopping Sutekh. It is a very memorable and somewhat disturbing scene, the likes of which the modern characterisation of the character never lends itself to. Even the Twelfth Doctor at his most callous was condemned by everybody around him and served his greater character growth. In the case of this moment, it is Sarah who is framed to be in the wrong for imparting human values upon the Doctor which is a potentially interesting notion but not a thread Holmes ever seems interested on pulling on again.

But I’ve digressed. There is potentially something very cool in the parallel between the four brothers but, again, the story is in dire need of another draft to really pull it to the fore. Lawrence is ultimately killed by his brother in quite a genuinely tragic moment since he is such a well performed and written character but the actual implications and significance of the scene beyond just the sheer shock value are ultimately lost on me. Marcus ends up never even knowing he did this, presumably, since he is killed the second he is freed from Sutekh. If Lawrence could be read as a parallel with Horus, or perhaps more closely of Osiris if we are considered the actual Osiris myth, what is this actually supposed to communicate? To depict for us that Sutekh would kill his own brother given the chance, as we know he did? That there is no humanity to appeal to with this villain? I am not sure of the intention but the scene, like this whole story, is almost fantastic.

And then there is the final episode. Every critic of this story before me has already torn this episode to pieces but I will just take it on briefly and note that the whole story just kind of falls apart at this point. The opening scenes with the Doctor and Sutekh are awesome but as soon as we actually get to the titular location, Holmes starts playing for time really hard. The first three episodes are already padded out to the max with extended woodland chases, an awkwardly large number of scenes where the Doctor and Sarah are simply walking to the poacher's shed and the entire character of the poacher himself in episode two who interacts with none of the main cast (save Marcus) and is just killed anyway. None of this blatant stretching of the script bends to breaking point thanks to how strong the production is at capturing the horror tone and aesthetic but the fourth episode is not so lucky. What we have here, for most of the episode, is an extended sequence of the Doctor and Sarah attempting an Egyptian themed escape room. This could have been compelling and some of the puzzles are kind of cool but the presentation is actually quite awful and the whole logic of this situation kind of escapes me. I suppose that Horus set these up to stop Sutekh’s followers from getting into the pyramid but does he just have the same voice as Sutekh? Is that what is going on?

It also does not help the story that this section is all shot on CSO and, aside from some great model work, looks incredibly cheap and bad. The serial takes a really shoddy nosedive but the biggest insult of this whole affair is simply that the whole episode is a colossal waste of time. The Doctor and Sarah accomplish nothing in going to the pyramid and just turn around to go back to the house to save the day with a totally different plan by the end anyway. Neither the characters nor the audience gain anything at all from the whole sequence. 

Thus, this is the great conflict I have with Pyramids of Mars because I love watching it. I love the flavour of the story and the clear effort that everybody put in to make it the memorable, entertaining experience. For the most part, I am really sucked in by it. But it is not a masterpiece. In the end, there really isn't very much to say about it at all. This is a serial that feels like watching the tracks being laid when the train's already moving. It makes for a fun journey but the final destination is really shaky. Pyramids of Mars is exceptional in theory just leaves that little bit to be desired. 

It is still a cracking story though. After all, this is mid-70s Who we’re talking about.

[thewritingginger]

Fluff Alphabet - Taiju Shiba

The poll finished up and our big boy Tai won! 

So here's some Taiju Fluff to get you through your Thursday :3

Fandom: Tokyo Revengers Letters: S,H,I,B,A Warnings: None, Fluff, GN! Reader

Enjoy ~

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

If you want something he thinks you should go hard for it

He’s not too good with the emotional aspect of things, he’ll try to listen tho

Very much a ‘You want it? Go get it!’  type

The best he can do is just be there & be your backbone when you need it

He feels you’ve supported him so it’s only right he tries to do the same

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

It was hard in the beginning, when your relationship was uncertain, for him to even think about sharing everything with you

If he is in a serious relationship/ married he tries to be honest and not keep anything very important from you

He might keep little things from you at first but over time when he feels it’s time he tries to be open with you

I nspired - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helping them overcome personal problems?

Tai’s s/o softened him out a bit —he’ll still K.O. someone if they get out of line, don’t get it twisted

But he is… gentler?!

Mostly with you, obviously

But I think you helped him gain a bit more patience when it comes to others

You also made him comfortable enough to share his feelings and issues, which isn’t easy for him to do with just anyone

In a nutshell you made this rabid dog a bit less rabid :)

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He admires the patience you have for him and others

& your gentleness really amazes him cuz it was something he wasn’t all too used to before you came along

Tai just thinks you have a beautiful soul and he doesn’t know how he landed you tbh

A ctivities - what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

He really likes making dinner with you in the evening when he gets home early enough

You might even be able to wrap him up into going with you to one of those adult classes for cooking or painting

If he’s down bad for you on a good day you could drag him probably just about anywhere

He works out a lot—obviously, look at him— so he enjoys it when you join him from time to time and he might get you a treat after cuz this big guy is actually a sucker for you oop but don’t tell him that you know 🤫

Thank you for reading!

If you liked this and want to see more, let me now  Feed back & Interaction is always appreciated :)

💛 ~ 

~ Masterlist ~

[wjbs-aus]

Since this is having a resurgence kinda,

Reblog for a larger sample-size or something? Or not. Your call!

Context for each below.

Back in, like, 2016 or something, the Secondary School I was at did lifeguard training as part of its PE curriculum; one of the activities involved was rescuing a hollow plastic dummy. When it was my turn, I grabbed it, but it suddenly filled with water, and I was suddenly dragged to the bottom of the pool; eventually I managed to let go of it, and I was allowed to sit on one of the benches next to the pool for the rest of the session.

Last year, around Halloween, my dad randomly phoned me up and asked if I wanted him to buy me an axe or scythe from the Halloween section of Tesco. I said I wanted a scythe, and he bought it; it was very plain, and consisted of a hollow plastic tube and a simple-looking, poorly-moulded blade that slid over the top. It eventually got pretty badly-damaged, and my brother - in a fit of sleep-deprived impulsiveness - secretly bought me a cooler, much higher-quality one (the blade is actually a skull wearing a mask with a long "beak" attached to it!)

Technically, I don't have all the Skylanders figures I got when I played, since at least one is still at the flat I used to live in, but otherwise I have all of them. Also I only had Giants, Swap Force and Trap Team; I missed out on playing Spyro's Adventure, and I only had a Wii at the time so I couldn't play most of the games after it (except for Superchargers Racing, which is literally just the racing minigame from the fifth game but released on its own).

Play Hard Reset. Do it do it now. It's short, kinda frustrating at times and has questionable writing and voice-acting, but the aesthetic is really cool and it has an interesting mechanic where the player only has two weapons, but can unlock different modes for them that effectively mean the player has ten. I haven't played much of Hard Reset Redux, but it seems to be the same, but balanced a bit better and with much better dialogue.

I got into ZScript late last year, but I've got pretty good at both the inheritence system and making original stuff (which is technically jus the same as using inheritence, but you have to define everything yourself.

I can't remember exactly when this happened, but it was around either Halloween or Christmas (since Nightmare Before Christmas was on TV) and possibly in 2018; I made myself a cup of tea, but didn't notice that the kettle had limescale remover put into it (aside from the colour being a bit off). When I started drinking it, I immediately spat it out, and since then it's been known in my family as A Thing I Did Once™.

I love Sea Power! They make good music! Check out Let The Dancers Inherit The Party, it is their best album in my opinion!

Yep, done this one. Haven't finished Quake 1's second expansion and I'm only on, like, map 2 of Quake II, but I've played all of Quake IV's story campaign. Also, if it counts, Quake III's "singleplayer campaign", which is just a series of increasingly-difficult bot matches.

When I got Reaper one of the first things I recorded was a scream, which coincidentally ended up being a scarily-good impression of the headless bombers from Serious Sam.

A while ago, I tried playing the Game Boy Advance version of Bionicle Heroes with an emulator, since I wanted to check it out; when I tried playing it with VBA, it crashed on the second screen, and while another emulator (namely No$GBA) allowed to, I had to make a DS4 controller-profile specifically for use with it, since it wasn't registering my inputs properly with my regular one. Eventually I just bought a Bionicle Heroes GBA cartridge online so I could play using my DS Lite.

Anyway here's the new scythe.

This picture physically hurt to take, like I had to lean really far back and stretch my arm really far out

[ourladyofwaysandmeans]

When I was fidgeting on my phone, instead of being "The World's Best Employee" or some such, I opened Facebook (almost always a mistake). On this sojourn to the site of regret, I saw a comic one of my old schoolmates posted in the wake of the recent Supreme Court decision(s) about the need to fight back against fascism using voices and protests. I'm not going to repost it here, mostly because I want to nitpick it to death despite agreeing with large swaths of it (not the thesis!). I'll just pull out one line:

"You deserve better than the lesser of two evils"

I can't say I disagree with that. We do deserve better than the hand we've been dealt*. I wish this wasn't where we are.

However, the people I went to school with are or will be 30 this year. And while there are steps we as a country could have made to improve our upcoming electoral choices, it is still incredibly likely that the path built 30 years ago would still lead us to the lesser of two evils.

The religious right rose up over forty years ago to protect segregated schools, though they claimed it was to be "pro-life"

Even after the Fifteenth Amendment:

The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of race, color, or previous condition of servitude— The Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.

was passed, Supreme Court cases have ruled against a "right to vote," which has led conservatives to inhibit the ability of people to vote for certainly more than four score and seven years.

There's also the societal belief that the best president who stands and acts a certain way, which partially led to Biden being the nominee, but that is not a can of worms I am fully opening today.

I'm not going to say that voting for the "lesser of two evils" is any fun. Looking down the ballot this year, none of my choices are going to make me feel great. The Democrat running for the House of Representatives in my district made some real bad choices in the month or two before the primary, when it was clear he was running unopposed and there was nothing we could do about it. I'm still going to roll up to my polling place and vote for him, and every single other Democrat on that ballot, because my choices are all bad but feeling like I wouldn't do the bare minimum is worse.** We don't have a choice between the lesser of two evils, and maybe we can't make it so future generations won't have a choice. Maybe it's too late. But we can do what we can to make the path smoother, and maybe make those lesser evils lesser than what we face.

I wrote most of this yesterday, before some dipshit in the New York Times put up an opinion piece titled "Why I Won't Vote," which they had to change from "Why I Don't Vote," because someone looked it up and this fucking guy voted in the last two elections. I didn't get past the paywall but it started with "Abstinence is having a moment" so I'm not going to try. I know everything sucks, but if dipshits in the opinion pages of the New York Times try to lie to you and tell you that voting isn't worth it, on FUCKING INDEPENDENCE DAY, I hope you know how to tell them where to go.

*This is not a post to argue that Joe Biden is not a "lesser evil," as the schoolmate was horrified by the genocide in Gaza that the United States still funds as of this writing and I'm not going to say believing that makes Joe Biden evil is wrong. If you think the presumptive Republican nominee was ever a "lesser evil", we have nothing to say to each other.

**I live in a state with early voting, where I've been in a kinda long line for voting once. You could say my vote doesn't count, that it won't affect the big picture, but my current representative is a Republican and that wasn't always true. My state government is making some real /interesting/ choices and I'm going to show up to primary the governor if she runs again. But I understand that voting isn't as easy for people in other states, and that's because people who don't want you to vote have made it hard.

[fun-with-colors]

Alright everyone, information after final results:

A vast majority of the additional ways in the tags were “mine and John’s” or “John’s and mine” or something to that effect; or “John and I’s.” Were I to make this again with the benefit of hindsight, I would have included those. As it stands, I may go through the tags and tally up the total numbers for those as well.

Regarding which option is right: there isn’t one. English has no way to discuss multiple people owning an object when one of those people is referred to with a pronoun. Linguists have seen 16 different ways that people have approached this, and none of those ways are entirely satisfying.

I and John’s pizza (“I is usually a subject, and this violates politeness rules)

John and I’s pizza (Again, “I” is usually a subject, and “I’s” is weird)

Me and John’s pizza (again, politeness. Also, there’s an idea that “me” should only ever be the object of a phrase. This one doesn’t technically break any actual rules, but it does break guidelines)

John and me’s pizza (same issue with “me” not being an object, and “me’s” is weird)

My and John’s pizza (technically, this *should* mean that both John and I have our own separate pizzas. Also, politeness)

John’s and my pizza (same problem)

John’s and mine pizza (“mine pizza” is odd on its own, and having “mine” last makes this obvious)

Mine and John’s pizza (again, politeness rules, and “mine pizza.”)

John’s and my’s pizza (this technically has a double possessive. “Me” is being made possessive within the phrase, and the phrase as a whole is being made possessive, like you would say “John and Joyce’s pizza.” It also technically implies two pizzas again.)

John’s and mine’s pizza (same issues as above, and “mine pizza.” Also, two pizzas.)

John and my’s pizza (only one pizza this time! Yay! We still have “my’s.”)

John and mine’s pizza (same as above, plus “mine pizza”)

John and my pizza (this technically follows all rules for constructing this possessive phrase, and has the same construction as “John and Joyce’s pizza.” However, it has no ‘s possession marker, and could be easily interpreted as “John, and my pizza.”

John’s and myself’s pizza (again, two pizzas. “Myself” has no grammatical reason to be here… other than to avoid “my’s.”)

John and myself’s pizza (only one pizza, but still has the out-of-place “myself”)

Myself and John’s pizza (politeness rules, and “myself” being out of place.)

Those are the 16 ways that linguists have seen used in corpora as of 2008 (credit to Arnold Zwicky on language log for summarizing the issue. This information is from there. The post title is “coordinate possessives.”

The three ways which are theoretically possible, but undiscovered in corpora:

I’s and John’s pizza

Me’s and John’s pizza

Myself’s and John’s pizza

So… yeah. There is no right answer. English doesn’t have a way to do this. I got that confirmed in Syntax class, and decided I wanted to make a quick poll and see what people were using, and it somehow turned into this. I really appreciate all of the answers; it’s been super fun.

And to everyone who said they actively restructure their sentences to avoid this conundrum: me too. I hate this situation so much. In normal conversation, I have said things like “My mom and I, our plans for today…”

And to all of the ESL folks in the notes: I’m sorry that our language is like this. The best way to sound like a native speaker when encountering this situation is to pick one option, hesitate, pick another, and then complain about English.

[little-strawberry100]

Can you do a kurt kunkle x Male reader who helps kurt murder his victims and instead of Jessie killing kurt the reader kills Jessie and then kurt kisses him

Kurt Kunkle X Male Reader

Summary: You've been best friends with Kurt about your whole life and he drags your into his get famous scheme to murder your fellow passengers and all was going well until one of them decided to fight back and nearly kill your best friend.

Warning: The following excludes, Cursing, Death, blood, Read with caution.

You were pinching the bridge of your nose as you listened to Kurt babble continuously about making love with none other than Jessie Adam's. It was very clear she had no interest in Kurt and was terrified for where he was taking her. "Where are we going!" Cried Jessie as she frantically looked around then looking back at you and Kurt in the front of the car. "I'm taking you home." Kurt replied simply shrugging with a small smirk on his lip that made your heart flutter a little. You had a major crush on Kurt ever since you met the guy, you admit she is very awkward and weird but you loved that about him and just adored it when he was shy.

"This is not the way to my fucking house Kurt!" Yelled Jessie as she glared daggers into the back of Kurt's seat as he glanced at her in the rear mirror with a look of realization. "Oh, not your home, my home." Said Kurt glancing back at the road here and there to make sure he didn't crash, you honestly felt jealous with the amount of attention Kurt has been giving Jessie all day ever since he picked her up with an asshole named Mario. You felt yourself fiddling with your fingers lightly picking at your nails and skin as you felt more and more uncomfortable with the thought of Kurt and Jeasie being together knowing she is not interested.

It wasn't until all of a sudden Kurt was forced back by Jessie wrapping the phone charger around his neck preventing him from breathing as he tried to drive, you quickly jumped up and tried to rip the cord from her hands to no avail. You then quickly punched her in the face stunning her which loosened her grip around the cord allowing Kurt to breath again as you tried to land another punch on Jessie for her yo beat you to it. You felt the impact of the punch land on your nose hearing it crack and feel a warm liquid flow down your face, you quickly landed a punch on Jessie's temple making her pass out as you panted and groaned in pain. "Are you okay (Y/n)!?" Yelled Kurt as he continued to drive as you slowly got back into your seat holding your bloody broken nose in your hand.

"I mean you're not dead so I'm fine." You mumbled feeling the pain grow worse as you talked, you felt Kurt's eyes quickly go to you after you said that as he looks at you with wide eyes. You just kept your eyes on the road not daring to look into his hazel eyes. You could practically hear the live stream chat going wild at what you said without even looking at the screen, moments later you hear the annoying voice of the Live stream voice boom from Kurt's Phone saying "OOOO, does (Y/n) like Kurt?!"

You felt your cheeks warm up at the comment sinking in your seat internally praying that you would just die to get away from all of this embarrassment. Eventually Kurt pulled up into a grassy field and started dragging Jessie on the ground a few feet away from the car with (Y/n)’s help and run back to the car to make a poll to see what he should do with Jessie the options being ‘FUCK’ ‘MARRY’ ‘KILL’. You felt your lips tug into a frown seeing as people were picking the option ‘FUCK’ but eventually the option ‘KILL’ was chosen reliving you slightly. “Okay.” said Kurt as he started adjusting his phone back into the phone holder. “So we're gonna run her over with the car?” you asked with a small smirk watching as Kurt continued to hold a stern face with him only nodding.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You watched in horror as Kurt started shooting his dad multiple times in the chest with no expression on his face, in the corner of your eye you could see Jessie trying to quietly climb into the front of the car in a panic. You quickly looked between Kurt and the car knowing exactly what Jessie was planning on doing. “Kurt get out of the way!” you shouted running up to Kurt and shoving him out of the way as the car came in contact with your waist and started shoving you back into the wall behind you letting a pained scream leave your mouth as you fought against the force. Kurt watched in horror as you were slowly getting crushed, he quickly scrambled to his feet still processing that you had saved him as he grabbed a nearby pencil and frantically climbed into the car startling Jessie as Kurt started stabbing Jessing over and over again with the pencil until her body went limp.

Kurt panted looking down at Jessie's now dead body laid in front of him then quickly shifting gears and reversing the car watching as your body slumped to the ground with a groan. Kurt was quick to run to your side catching you as you slid on your side landing on Kurt's lap, looking up at him with tired eyes. “Are we famous yet?” you weakly asked with a small tired smile on your lips as you watched as Kurt chuckled a little with tears filling in his eyes as he looked down at you warm-heartedly with his own little smile. “Yes, yes we did (Y/n).” Kurt's voice cracked looking down at you love struck as you watched his eyes travel down to your lips before fluttering back to your eyes. You sat up pushing all the pain you felt aside as you too were in a love struck state as Kurt’s and your faces slowly inched closer until both of your eyes fluttered closed lips making contact while one of your hands found its way tangled in Kurt’s hair.

When you both felt the need for air you pulled away and panted looking into Kurt's eyes as all you saw in them was lust as if he needed you right now. You chuckled, giving Kurt a small little peck on his lips making him pout. “We should probably leave before the police get here and arrest us.” you stated making Kurt’s pout get bigger as he stood helping you up with your arm around his shoulders to help support your weight, and then went to go find a safe place to hide from the police for the night.

Word count: 1,095

[espressokiri]

Can I request Aizawa with a popular hero s/o? Class 1-A loves them and goes crazy when they find out he’s married to their idol.

Aizawa x GN!reader

In which reader is Aizawa's married partner and is popular with crowds and loved by class 1-A.

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Note: (H/n) = Hero name

Being a man who savoured his alone time, mostly spending it catching up with sleep due to his hectic scheduling of night patrol and teaching students, he was surprised to have fallen for a colleague who fell into the spotlight and enamoured everyone they came in contact with. They were the prime example of ‘opposites attract’ and it was oddly endearing. 

Y/n always emitted a comforting energy around them, their soft and nurturing nature drawing admirers and fans, hence shooting their rank in the Heroes poll right under the popular winged hero. Despite their popularity due to their personality, their strong ability to maneuver their quirk and quick thinking under stressful situations had gained them respect with both civilians and heroes.

Because of the awareness that Aizawa does not enjoy the spotlight, Y/n had always arrived to their shared home in secrecy to avoid paparazzi and crazed fans from finding out their humble abode, a comfortable one bedroom modern apartment that was perfect for the pair of them. Their odd schedules seemed to clash but the couple always made it work, sometimes sacrificing each other’s sleep to be able to spend time with the other -usually Y/n as they know Aizawa lacks enough sleep already.

“Sweetheart, it’s time for you to wake up.” Y/n whispers softly, leaning over Aizawa and tracing their forefinger around his facial features, easing him awake. A groan rumbles in the man’s throat before he slowly opens his eyes, a soft smile taking over as he’s met with the worried gaze of his partner. “Good morning.” Aizawa’s voice rasps out, throat dry from just waking up.

“Morning, my love.”

Aizawa takes their hand that was on his face and places it on his lips, giving it a peck before letting go.

“Breakfast is ready.” Y/n informs before trudging out of the room, leaving a sighing Aizawa as he dreaded dealing with a bunch of chaotic teenagers. 

When Aizawa came out freshened up and dressed in his hero uniform, he was met with Y/n leaning on the kitchen counter in their pyjamas, sipping on coffee in their favourite mug and focussing on their phone. Y/n had a late start in the morning for their shift in the agency, so they tried making the most of their morning.

Aizawa walked towards them, placing both hands on the counter, confining them in between his arms. Y/n raised an eyebrow at his approach, placing their phone away and looking at him while having the rim of the mug on their lips as they took a sip. “Need anything?” A smirk played on their lips as Aizawa scoffed at their question, swiftly swooping down and placing a kiss on their lips. 

Y/n placed their mug on the counter, besotted in the affection their partner was showcasing. Aizawa brought his hands to their hips and helped them up onto the counter, slotting himself in between them with both hands on their thighs. Y/n ran their hand through his hair as they gazed at each other with deep longing and understanding. “You don’t have much time.” Y/n murmured, leaning their head onto his shoulder, placing a soft kiss on his neck, making goosebumps arise on the touched skin.

“I know, I’m enjoying while I can.” Aizawa sighed, grabbing the mug Y/n had placed aside and taking a sip from it. Y/n let out a sound of disapproval, “you have your own coffee right there!” They pointed at the steaming mug placed on the kitchen table.

“Just giving yours a try.” He shrugged, a smile on his lips as he grabbed his mug and leaned back against the counter in between Y/n’s legs. Y/n ran their fingers through his hair, untangling the knots he seemed to not have brushed out. “I have patrol till six today, I won’t be home when you come back from work.” Y/n spoke.

Aizawa had his eyes closed as he savoured the warm beverage and the calm feeling of his partner working on his hair. “That’s alright, be sure to eat dinner early. Stay safe.” Aizawa was upset that they didn’t even get weekends to spend together to do normal couple things, it was a rare occurrence for both their schedules to align.

When Aizawa did enter his homeroom classroom, facing the rowdy students of class 1-A, he stumbled upon a conversation between Mineta and Kaminari, “(H/n) is so cool! I can’t believe they aren’t higher up in the hero rankings, they have an amazing record of defeating villains!” Kaminari gushed. 

“Forget that! Do you see how sexy they look? With that sweet nature of theirs, I’m sure they must be so submiss-” Bindings wrapped around the short grape boy as Aizawa held a menacing glare, the class hushing with the sudden change in mood.

“It would do you good not to speak of my partner in such a vulgar manner.”

A beat of silence was held before the class erupted in excitement and confusion, “partner?!”

Ashido raised her hand up high and wiggled it around before Aizawa sighed and beckoned her to speak, “sensei! Are romantically involved with (H/n)?!” 

There he’s done it, Aizawa was aware of his class idolizing Y/n and now he’s gotten his privacy breached. “Yes, we are married.”

Ensue more shock and raised hands.

After a gruelling day of being interrogated by his students and teaching, Aizawa made his way home before he would start his nightly patrol. Shoving the keys in the lock, he opened the door and let himself inside, upset that he would be home alone for the remainder of his time.

“Ah, shit!”

Aizawa froze as he heard the sound coming from the bathroom, eyes glancing towards the clock in the kitchen. Y/n wasn’t supposed to be home yet. He rushed his way into the bathroom to come across Y/n with a gash on the side of their head which they were tending to.

“What happened?!”

Y/n jumped at the sudden loud noise, turning around and finding their husband with a worried gaze settled onto their wound. “Nothing serious, I got caught off guard because of that stupid birdbrain of a hero.” Y/n waved it off, scoffing when they mentioned Hawks. Aizawa held their face in between his hands as he inspected the wound, it wasn’t deep but it would need to be cared for.

As Aizawa cleaned the blood around the wound and disinfected it, he brought up the incident today. “My class also really wants to meet you.” 

Y/n was aware of how much Aizawa adored his class, despite not wording it and pretending they were a lot of work. “I’d love to meet them too! I’m free tomorrow if you’d like.” Y/n offered. Aizawa swallowed nervously, “tomorrow sounds good.” Y/n had never visited U.A. while Aizawa was working, and he was nervous about the whole ordeal. 

To say he was nervous was an understatement, Aizawa kept glancing at the classroom door as he was teaching, wondering when they’d come in and how things would go. It wasn’t like him to be nervous but perhaps he wanted to show Y/n how well he could handle kids like they could.

As he monitored the class doing their worksheets, the door slid open revealing Y/n holding a small bento in their hands. “It’s (H/n)!” The class were bouncing with excitement and squeals could be heard. Y/n gave a friendly wave to the class as they made their way to Aizawa, giving him a kiss on the cheek, riling the students up more, before placing the bento box on his desk.

“Hello class 1-A! It’s great to finally meet you!” Y/n gave their brightest smile as they were excited to meet Aizawa’s ‘problem children’. They seemed to be a lively bunch with unique appearances, it was very endearing to see teenagers with bright smiles and a strong heart. 

“How’d you meet Aizawa sensei, (H/n)?” Ashido had questioned, buzzing with excitement as she gazed over what the hero was wearing. “You guys can call me Y/n.” Y/n winked, “also we met back in high school, but we were acquaintances until he started working with an underground agency and I gained the courage to ask him out.” 

“If Aizawa sensei can get someone like Y/n, then there’s still hope for us!” Kaminari wailed, a glare pointed at him by his teacher.

Y/n snickered, “despite his rugged appearance, he’s quite the charmer.” They praised, causing the girls in the class to swoon at the sweet words. 

“So Shota, are you going to show me how strong your class really is?”

Ground Beta never seemed to get awfully torn down when Y/n was in U.A., but it seems that Aizawa’s class held destructive and strong quirks that left their mouth wide open at the power a bunch of teenagers held. Especially the three Aizawa had mentioned once or twice in passing; Todoroki Shoto, Bakugou Katsuki, and Midoriya Izuku.

“Here dear, let’s get you hydrated.” Y/n handed Uraraka a bottle of water as the girl looked nauseas from the overuse of her quirk. “T-thank you!” Uraraka bowed timidly before shakily grabbing the bottle, Y/n just gave her a gentle smile and ruffled her hair, “you were so cool Uraraka, and your hero suit is adorable.” A fiery blush erupted on the girl’s face at the compliment and affectionate touch.

“What do you think of my quirk?!” An overexcited Kaminari ran over to the two, seeing his idol praise Uraraka had him craving for approval from the hero. “It’s very powerful, Kaminari! You’re doing great with the limited usage as well to not overwhelm yourself!” Y/n pinched his cheek, a slight static grazing the pads of their fingers as the blonde was jittering with joy. 

“Stop hogging her Denki!” Jirou had shoved the blonde away, “Jirou! I’m so excited to be seeing more of your quirk in use! I love how calm you are while IN action!” 

“Y/n! Can we train together?”

“Yeah! I wanna see what it’s like fighting a real pro!”

Y/n grinned at their enthusiasm and agreed, all of class A seemed to have brightened up and tried their best to show off to their idol.

Aizawa was watching from a distance, a soft smile on his lips as he watched his partner interact with his students. They were always good with kids, especially teenagers, as they claimed all the kids ever want is someone to listen to them and understand their thought process. Maybe he would bring Y/n along often to training during their off days. 

[ameliajessicawilliamspond]

PART 2

----------------------------------------------------

A heavy kick to his ribs was Luke Skywalker's rude awakening.

"Rise and Shine, sweetheart!" A cruel voice mocked.

"Come on, Qiler." Someone responded, exasperated.

Luke looked around the room grogily. The jedi was surrounded by five men, his hands bound above his head to an old rusty poll in a cold, dingy bunker. His head was still spinning from whatever they had given him to knock him out.

"Hey, kid!" A man to his left slapped him across the face to get his attention. "What are you doing in our territory?"

Luke bit his lip, thinking. If they knew why he was here, they might kill him. If they knew who he was, they might kill him. If he said nothing, they might kill him. Either way, this was not an ideal situation to be stuck in. His silence earned him a punch to the stomach from the larger man to his right. "My friend just asked you a question. I suggest you answer."

"Haha! Good one, Keye!" Another laughed.

"I..." Luke began before biting his tongue once more. He had to decide how best to deal with this situation. He could use the force right now, break the bonds, take these ruffians out and be done with it. After all, Din was unconscious somewhere out there in the cold; freezing, dying, alone....

But these men may be their only help around for miles. Plus, they could be the smugglers who had found the holocron, which means it could be close.

He had to be smart about this.

Luke leaned forward, his mouth open as if he was about to speak, before sighing and leaning back against the cold metal behind him. "Nah, you guys wouldn't know what I'm looking for."

"What do you mean?" The man in the middle -Qiler, he remembered the skinny one say earlier- asked.

"It's just that...well," Luke looked them up and down, wrinkling his nose. "it's above YOUR paygrade." He said, as snoody as he could, earning himself another slap across the face. Qiler grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him close enough that their noses nearly touched.

"We are the famous Smugglers of Kajimi." He said, glaring into the jedi's eyes.

Luke blinked. "...Who?"

"The..." Qiler stuttered. "We're..." His grip loosened as he broke eye contact to look at his comrades. They all looked as surprised as he was. "You've never heard of us?"

"Sorry." Luke shrugged. "Must be local fame or something."

"Where are you from?" The skinny one asked.

"Ever heard of the Galatic Republic?" The jedi felt tension rush through the room at his words. "I was sent on a mission to find some artifact for them."

"What kind of artifact?" The big meaty one asked.

"Like I said, you've probably never even heard of it." Luke said, sitting back again, nonchalantly. "I mean, it's common knowledge where I'm from, but maybe not all the way out here."

Qiler reached forward at lighting speed, grabbing his jaw and pulling him close once again.

"What. Is. It?" He demanded.

Luke stared the man down for a moment before yanking his face from the man's grasp. "A Jedi Holocron."

The men looked at each other. Luke shrugged, regaining his non-chalant demeanor. "Like I said, I'm sure you've never heard of it. Why would you?" He laughed.

"Oh yeah, smartass?" Qiler yelled, turning back toward the table behind him. He reached into a drawer and pulled out an odd cube.

There it was.

Din was right. The Smugglers of Kajimi did find it. But they hadn't sold it yet!

"What do you think of that?" He said, tossing it in the air like it was a ball and not one of the rarest artifacts in the galaxy.

"I think you better give that to me so I can return it to the Republic." Luke said, his whole demeanor had changed, his tone low and serious.

Qiler let out a hearty laugh, putting it down on the table with a loud thump that made the Jedi flinch. "Empire, Republic, none of them have ever done nothing for me."

Luke took a deep breath before shrugging and leaning back against the pole that held him there, trying to regain his charade. "Oh well. The Republic would have paid you big for that, as well as for me." He made his eyes go wide, feigning surprise. "...oops."

"What was that?" Qiler asked, rising from his seat.

Luke stayed silent.

"Maskter, run a search on him." He said and the group turned their backs on him. Maskter ran through the bounty database before finally pulling up Luke's bounty.

"A jedi?" Maskter read. The group looked between each other. The bounty on him was...It was insane.

Just as they were about to round on the jedi, Luke sprang into action. He snapped his binds and stood, extending his hand and shoving the group apart with the force. He pulled Din's scarf from his back pocket and rushed forward, grabbing and wrapping the holocron in the fabric before making a break for the door.

It flew open, intense cold rushing in and wrapping around his body like frozen fingers gripping at his limbs. A sudden memory flashed through his mind of --Cold, so cold, Ben? Ben was here. Degoba? Pain, pain, pain...Han?-- He shook his head, pulling himself from the awful memory and rushed into the snow, cradling the artifact. He didn't know where he was, and he didn't care. He knew he had to get out of the area first, find the waterfall, get Din and get the kriff home. His mind swam with the last image of Din he had; laying on the bank, reaching for him...

Engrossed in his own worry, he missed the sudden sharp warning in the Force as something tore through his abdomen.

Luke stopped in his tracks, the air sucked out of his lungs. With wide eyes, Luke slowly looked down, his hand touching his stomach. When he pulled it away, it was wet with blood.

A bullistic. And not blaster fire, a solid bullet had gone through his body.

So, his bounty was dead or alive, then?

Luke dropped to his knees, one shaking hand gripped over the wound and the other clinging desperately to the wrapped holocron.

Behind him he heard voices. The smugglers were gaining on him.

Luke screwed his eyes shut, trying, desperately trying to push past the pain spreading through his body. He stood slowly, ever so slowly, placing the holocron down next to him.

He stretched out his fingers, trying to stall their shaking with little results. The men got closer, their voice grew louder. He raised his arms high in the air before slamming them down. The earth beneath him shook and a huge flurry of snow flew up behind him, blinding the group pursuing him. They screamed in frustration as they stumbled and got lost in the sudden snow storm.

Luke bent down, letting out a cry as his wounded side protested the movement, then ran as fast as he could. He ran and ran and ran, not caring where he ended up, he just had to away. Away from the smugglers, the bunker, the violence, the pain. He ran until his body didn't allow him to run anymore. He found a large snowbank and rushed behind it, falling behind the freezing cover, hoping it was enough to shield him from his pursuers. Luke gasped in breath after breath, trembling hands gripped against his wound, dropping the holocron next to him so both hands could put pressure on the wound. His body wouldn't respond anymore, too cold, too hurt to move. Luke choked back a sob as another rush of pain went through him.

He really hated the cold.

"I'm sorry, Din." He mumbled, before slipping into unconciousness.

----------------------------------------------------

"Luke!" Din woke with a start, the jedi's name dripping from his lips. He sat up before instantly regretting it, his aching body bringing him swiftly back to the ground.

"Well, well, the sleeping beauty awakens." A gruff voice says from behind him. He turns to see a woman entering the doorway, a pile of logs in her arms. She looked to be in her late 60's with long blue hair and shining orange eyes hidden behind the markings of wisdom her age had earned her.

"Where am I?" Din asked.

"You are a guest in my home, even if as a reluctant one." She said, tending the fire.

Din's memory began to catch up with him and he remembered his last cognitive memory; Luke being drugged and dragged away by strangers as they left him for dead. "Where is my companion?"

"I didn't seen anyone else. Although there were a lot of markings on the ground from what looked like a scuffle." She told him.

"Who's out here?" Din asked.

The woman froze for a moment. "There's been some activity around the waterfall within the last week."

"Pirates?" Din questioned.

Her glowing eyes latched onto his helmet. "The Spice Runners of Kajimi."

Din's chest tightened. If the Spice Runners discovered who he was, Luke would be in a world of danger. His face was plastered all over the bounty boards, and from what he last saw a few of those were marked "dead or alive." He stood up, rushing toward the door.

"Hey, a thank you would be nice!" The woman yelled after him.

Din froze, hand hovering over the door handle, before turning back toward his host. "How did you know to check the lake?"

The woman's eyes became distant. "I just...felt like I needed to go there." She explained slowly, like she wasn't sure what had brought her there herself. "There was this...feeling. Like the heaviness of desperation was burnt into the air, a silent voice begging for help through the wind..."

Din sucked in a breath.

--Oh, Luke...-- Din thought.

"Thank you for saving me. I have to go." He said, turning back to the door.

"This companion of yours, must be pretty important." She said. Din didn't answer. The woman stared him down, studying him before reaching down into a bag and pulling out a metal cylinder. She tossed it to the Mandalorian. Din caught it, studying the tube. It was Luke's Lightsaber.

"Found that near the lake. This friend of yours. He's one of those jedi." She said. It wasn't a question.

Din stayed silent.

"I used to run with them. I know where their base is." She said.

"Why are you helping me?" Din asked.

The woman turned her head and bit her lip, contemplating what to say. "One of his kind helped me get away from those people when they turned on me. It's only right I return the favor."

"You knew a jedi?" Din asked, stepping toward her.

"A togruta woman. She carries two of those. She was looking for someone, ended up finding me instead..." She reminisced. "But that's a story for another time." She said, making her way toward a drawer against the wall. She reached in, pulling a holomap from it, then handed it to Din. He activated it, the place where Luke was being held glowing before his eyes. He wasn't far. He thanked her again, shaking her hand. She nodded at him. "Go find your jedi."

----------------------------------------------------

Luke's could feel hands on him, shaking him back into consciousness. One was gripping his shirt, the other tapping his face. Someone was trying to wake him up.

"Din?" Luke whispered out, hoping beyond hope.

"He's alive!" Someone yelled. Luke screwed his nose up at the sound.

That wasn't Din's voice.

He was pulled roughly to his knees, the movement jostling his aching body and pulling a cry from his trembling lips.

"You wanna treat us like we're stupid?" The voice said above him, hitting him hard across the jaw. "You wanna pretend you're better than us?" He said again, a knee entering his sternum, causing the jedi to cough, blood mixed with spit falling on the prestine white snow.

"Please..."Luke begged, his body screaming against the assault.

"Oh, now you want to beg? Too late!" The man mocked. "You make a mockery of us, you don't leave alive!" He yelled. Something cold and hard was pressed against Luke's forehead.

"Hey, we may get more credits if he's alive!" Someone yelled from behind Qiler.

"No! You saw that thing he did with the snow! He's too dangerous, I want him dead!" The man screamed, beyond crazed with anger. The barrell was removed from his head, the man grabbing him by the jaw, ripping Luke's head up to look at him as a knife was pressed to his throat. "The only question is if I wanna do it fast or slow." He growled.

Before Qiler could make his desicion, the earth erupted around them.

Single spikes from what seemed to be bombs set off around the perimeter. A row of them cut off Qiler from the rest, seperating the party. Qiler looked around at the disruption before turning his wide, crazed eyes back to the jedi. "What did you do!?" He screamed. Luke was too cold, in too much pain to respond, he tried to shake his head to convey this wasn't his doing this time. Qiler hoisted Luke up by the shirt and flipped him around so that his back was flush against Qiler's chest, knife to his throat as the smuggler backed away from the commotion. Scattered screams echoed incoherently through the blinding snow as whoever was hunting them made their way through the crew.

Using the diversion to his advantage, Luke shoved the man off him with the little amount of Force he could muster, his broken body crumpled to the ground.

Qiler recovered, letting out a frustrated scream as he barrelled after the jedi. He grabbed his ankles and flipped Luke onto his back, pinning his arms above his head and digging a knee into the wound on his side, mounting him. Luke screamed, his voice cracking in the process. The knife was pressed to his throat once again, this time, drawing blood. "Bye bye, jedi." He mocked.

But his threat remained unfinished, thanks to the blaster bullet the just went through his skull. The man fell off Luke with a thump, legs still tangled around his damaged torso.

Luke didn't move, he couldn't anymore. Any adrenaline he had left was sucked dry the second he landed on the ground. He lay there, staining the white snow red like the sands of Crait, shivering so violently it could be mistaken for convulsing. He heard footsteps approaching him. Luke pinched eyes shut, waiting for whoever hunted down the smugglers to do the same to him.

"Luke?"

The jedi's eyes shot open. That voice sounded familiar.

The man kneeled down next to the fallen jedi. Luke gasped, in spite of himself as a familiar helmet came into view. "You're alive?"

Din Djarin nodded. "I told you we were getting off this blasted rock, didn't I?"

Luke's wrecked body finally caught up to him. Every nerve seemed to be frozen over, except for his side which screamed at every movement. He caught a glance at his reflection in Din's visor. His blond hair was thick and frozen, little blond icicles dipped in red from the blood that had pooled around him. His lips were purple, chapped beyond compare. His neck leaked blood from where the knife had pushed in and Luke realized this was the first time he'd ever experienced a murder attempt that was actually a threat since... He couldn't hold back the sob that escaped his mouth.

"I'm so sorry, Luke, this never should of happened. I'm so, so sorry." Din said, voice shaken as he put pressure on the wound, pulling a cry from the younger man. Din shook his head. "Kark that blasted holocron, I'm taking you home."

The Holocron! Luke looked past Din, spotting the artifact still wrapped in the scarf. Luke reached toward it, trying to pull it with the Force. When the thing wouldn't budge, Luke let out a grunt of frustration, trying to sit up. Din pushed him back down. "Luke, enough, please, cyare, enough." He begged, taking Luke's shaking hand in his own.

"No, Din, please, please!" He managed to say, ripping his hand free from Din's, pointing a trembling finger at the wrapped box.

Din glanced back, spotting what had Luke's attention. "I can get another one, it's alright." He said about the scarf, continuing his field medicine.

"No, no! Please!" Luke insisted, wiggling against the pressure on his abdomen, shoving at Din's hands. Din let out a sigh as Luke stubbornly pointed at the scarf again.

"Okay. Okay, cyar'ika, alright. Put pressure on this." He instructed, guiding Luke's frozen hands to his side, pressing them into it. He stood, fingers lingering over the man's wrecked body for a moment, before turning to go. "I'll be right back." He promised.

Luke watched with greying vision as the mandolorian reached down and picked it up. With a sigh of relief, he looked back up at the sky, watching the snow fall lightly around him. He had stopped shivering, something that should have worried him more than it was. He didn't have the energy to care, he was too tired. His eyes slipped closed and he gave into oblivion.

----------------------------------------------------

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If there are any mistakes please let me know!

There will be a part 3!!!! Comment in the notes if you'd like to be tagged in it!

EDIT: Just went through and fixed a few buggy parts. Sorry, did not check this right the first time! Hopefully that's a bit better!

[sylvie-writes]

𝐀𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐦 ✯ 𝐒. 𝐑𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬

word count: 4,000

pairing: steve rogers x female reader

summary: If one had to live the same day over and over again, it would be most sensible of them to choose the best one. Well unfortunately for you, you didn’t get a choice.

warnings: angst

a/n: this was the one-shot i had posted a preview of and i apologize for taking so long to post it. i couldn’t decide how to end it so then i took a poll and it was a fluffy ending, which helped me a bit! thanks! btw sorry if the formatting looks weird. on my computer it looks weird, but on my phone it looks normal so idk. 

please excuse any mistakes!

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

For the first time in years, you awoke to notice the light of the sun and how it ever so brightly twinkled. The sun had never actually disappeared, but today you had actually taken the time to notice it in all of its glory. Just the mere sight brought a bittersweet smile to your face, along with the feeling of delight, something you had missed so dearly during the dark period of time that had finally ended yesterday. Half of the world had disappeared for what seemed forever and with that no longer looming over your head, you could actually live and enjoy life for what it is. It may sound cliche, but the sun did seem brighter to you now, and the world a happier place after being reset. Last night, you had watched the news and for the first time in forever, it was enjoyable. On the screen, images of people reuniting along with many others sending words of thanks to your crew mates turned family, the Avengers. 

Today, you were mostly relishing in the peace, but just a small bit of worry settled in your stomach as Steve was returning the stones back to their normal timelines. No matter how many times Sam offered to go with him, the stubborn man refused, still ready to take the risk on his own. Times like these made you miss Nat even more as she was probably the only person, aside from you, to be able to talk Steve out of anything. Instead of continuing to dwell on the matter that was out of your hands, you turned away from the sunny window and to your left. The sound of your shuffling in the sheets must’ve awoken the man beside you as his grip tightened its hold on your waist. He pulled you closer into his chest and then wrapped two arms around you, forming a warm and inviting hug. After some sleepy groaning, lips met the top of your head which you could only tell by feeling since your face was currently being squished into the man. 

“Good Morning, gorgeous. What time is it?” Steve picked his chin up from the top of your head, peering over to your nightstand where the clock sat. As he did so, he noticed you were squeezing your eyes shut and murmuring some silent “no’s” and “it’s not time yet.” 

He chuckled at your defiance and then unwrapped his arms so he could lean back and instead run his fingers through your hair. “I hate to break it to you, but we have to meet the rest of the team in an hour.” 

Turning onto your stomach, you threw your face into Steve’s pillow while also ignoring his annoying bright smile as if he was entertained. “Ugh, can’t they just wait. It’s not like the stones have suddenly grown feet and are gonna run away.”

“Hon, you’ve left me no choice.” 

It got freakishly quiet and next thing you knew, Steve had thrown back the sheets and thrown you over his shoulder.

“Steve! I was just about to get up!!” You quickly sat up to face the blonde and not his backside which caused him to somehow gently rotate you in a way that you were now being held bridal style. Steve simply shrugged and kissed your forehead before heading to the bathroom to start the shower, you still in his arms.

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

It was only supposed to be seconds. 

And as of now, it has been at least a minute.

All hell's breaking loose at the moment. Bucky, feet glued to the ground, looks around as if Steve is gonna magically appear and Sam is worriedly questioning Bruce who is anxiously messing with the buttons of his controls. On the other hand, you are still staring at the platform, the traffic in your mind finally halting which ultimately caused you to drop to the floor in shock. As you were out cold on the ground, Sam looked over for a split second and luckily caught you in his sight. 

About fifteen minutes later, you woke up in the infirmary. You looked to your right where Bruce was standing with a water while Bucky and Sam waved at you from the nearby seats. Your first reaction was anger as you saw the three here and not working on getting Steve back who was currently nowhere in sight. Rejecting the bottle, you sat up straight. With fire in your eyes, you stared at Bruce, “Where is he?”

The gentle giant just shook his head, urging you to drink more water. Immediately, you ripped the i.v tube from your arm, ignoring the slight burn and then the draft from the paper gown that clothed your body. Just as you made it to the door, both Sam and Bucky held out their hands, stopping you from exiting. 

“Woah woah, missy. Where do you think you are going?”

Bucky slowly reached out to place a hand on your waist in a way to make sure that you wouldn’t run off while Sam distracted you further. 

“To find Steve.”

Sam sucked in a harsh breath and folded his arms over his chest. “(y/n). We all care about both you and Steve very much-”

“If you did care, then you’d be out there looking for him!” Your emotions had finally bubbled over and now resentful tears were starting to emerge. 

“Think about what you just said because it doesn’t make sense! We are just as worried as you are and we’ve done everything, and I mean everything, we can. He’s gone.” Sam’s eyes softened and he put a hand on your shoulder, “Please get some rest. There’s nothing else to be done.” The stubbornness started to subside and in turn, reality seeped into your mind. You then looked to Bucky, seeing that he was looking at you the same way as Sam.

“Sam and I will be on the lookout. I promise (y/n). Steve wouldn’t want you up right now and you know that.” 

With a childlike huff you turned back towards the bed as the two men ushered you to it. 

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

Hours must have passed because next thing you knew it was morning again and you were back in your own bed. It was somewhat shocking as you felt as good as new, possibly even better than you’ve felt before. As you finally awoke, you felt something heavy on your waist and looking down, you noticed an arm slung around your torso. You blinked a few times to make sure it was real and your mind then ran to the most sensible conclusion.

Whispering, you stared at the hand as if it was foreign, “Bucky?”

Suddenly a voice replied in all of its deepend glory, “Sorry, doll, but it’s Steve.” 

The hand then moved and you heard sheets shuffling as Steve turned onto his back to stretch his arms with an overdramatic yawn.

You shot up faster than an eager student’s hand. With a soft gasp you brought a hand to your lips. It couldn’t be…

“W-When did-d you get back?” It was quiet, but Steve’s enhanced hearing picked it up just as he had done so a few seconds before.

“What do you mean?” He looked at you with pure confusion. 

“You returned the time stones. Yesterday… And you never came back.”

Dark blonde eyebrows creased together and a hand made its way to your forehead. “(y/n), you are worrying me. We aren’t returning the stones until today. Are you okay? What did you eat last night?”

Before Steve could mother goose anymore, you clumsily shuffled out of the bed, but not removing eye contact from the man. “I’ll-I’ll be right back.” 

You slipped on shoes, apparently mismatched ones, but you were too anxious to care. In a millisecond, the bedroom door was shut. You, running out like you were fearing for your life and Steve on the other side, concerned and confused.

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

“GUYS, THEY ARE REAL! WE ARE GONNA NEED TO GO INTO LOCKDOWN!”

Running into the kitchen like a madwoman, you screamed the words you believed to be true. The innocent bystanders, Scott and Wanda, were currently gathering the rest of their things, while Bruce stood in the kitchen making breakfast. Everyone had been ready to go off onto their own paths after the events of yesterday (including Tony’s funeral), but currently you thought you held some mind-blowing information that would stop time, so to say.

“(y/n) what’s happening?” Wanda threw down her box and rushed to your side as you were already talking a mile a minute. None of them could understand a single word for it sounded like absolute gibberish. 

“There is a shapeshifter in my room. You know, those things Carol talked about! I thought she was bullshitting us, but the Skrulls or whatever are real. What are we gonna do? I know there are some th-” 

“Darling, what are you going on about? There’s nothing in our room, I just came from there. You’ve been acting weird all morning.” Entering the common area, Steve leaned up against the doorway before beginning to approach your shaking form.

Absolute horror in your eyes, you looked at Steve in terror as he now tenderly held your wrists in his hands.

“It’s you.”

He titled his head like a confused puppy while the rest of the onlookers stood by. You weren’t sure what to say for if you said “it’s him,” that would be equivalent to standing in a bank robbery and calling the cops right in front of the shooter. Rather you went with what you thought was smart and uttered Wanda’s name. 

It took her a second, but she looked as if she had caught on once having invaded your thoughts. Although, your hope was lost when she ended up mirroring Steve’s perplexed look. 

Taking matters into your own hands (quite literally,) you roughly shook your hands free from Steve’s loving hold and walked over to the nearby side table, discreetly eying the lamp. From first glance, it looked to the team members as if you were simply going to turn on the light, but all of a sudden, the lamp was in your hands and ready to launch at Steve. A mixture of “stops” and gasps sounded when it flew in the air. The team was quick to act, but it all happened in slow-motion for you. 

The lamp froze in the air with a red aura surrounding it thanks to Wanda while Steve tossed himself at you to avoid the incoming object. Of course, by doing so he rolled to make sure not to crush you while making impact with the ground. Once everything stopped, the lamp was returned to its place and your teammates started to slowly approach, you went to stand up, but Steve’s grasp stopped you. In fact, he flipped you over so your back was now on the carpet, an aggravated blonde now hanging over your body. His hands were pinning down your once flailing arms and his eyes burned into your own.

“(y/n). Tell me what is going on. Now.” Rarely did Steve ever use this tone with you. Actually, he’s never used it with you. It also occurred to you that you probably looked a bit insane to your friends and boyfriend, so you figured it was time to come clean. If they thought you were deranged, then oh well. What else was there to do?

“If you aren’t a shapeshifter then what’s happening!?!” 

You reached out to grab the fistfuls of his shirt before beginning to cry quietly. Steve could sense you were really upset over whatever this is because you were never one to act in such an irrational way. At this point, Bruce, Wanda and Scott stood by, concerned for you and the current situation. Steve leisurely leaned down, pressing a comforting kiss to your temple before hovering by your ear. 

“What is wrong, my love? Tell me so I can help you.”

Stopping the tears, you peered up at the man who you trusted your life with. So far, you had managed to convince yourself that this was really your Steve, but that only left one conclusion, yet you didn’t want to believe it.  Not yet anyway.

“Steve, you disappeared...yesterday. I can remember it all, I swear.” Your voice died down as you thought of a way to convince them. “Bruce, tell them, you were there too! Please, I’ve already lived this day.”

Chiming in from the back was Bruce, “What day do you think it is then?”

You replied the date at which Wanda told you that it wasn’t, but rather that it was the day before. 

Steve had loosened his hold on you at this point and you managed to scoot up and lean up back against the side table. 

“So then what does that mean? I’m living the same day… over again?”

Everyone started to nod in acceptance like they were welcoming the idea and you just suddenly burst out, hysterically laughing at the ridiculousness.“Well that’s just great, guys!  I’ve lost my damn mind. It’s okay you all don’t have to play along, just ship me away already, will y’a?” 

“I’ve gone off the rails, Steven. How do you even put up with this!?” You motioned to yourself in disgust and Steve laughed, shaking his head. “Sweetheart, I’ve seen a lot, especially these last five years, so this doesn’t even sound remotely crazy.”

Scott moved closer to reassure you. “No, (y/n), you haven’t! This is entirely possible. believe it or not. In simplest terms, it’s like that movie,” The man paused to think before shining a boastful smile at you, “Groundhog’s Day. You know, the one with Bill Murray.”

Bruce piped up from his distant spot in the kitchen, “Not another movie, Scott! We’ve already discussed this, just because it was in a movie, doesn’t make it true.”

“Hey, don’t knock it till you try it. That IS how we found time travel after all. Thank god my parents let me watch Back to the Future or else-” 

The doctor looked at Scott with a face that practically screamed “fair enough and please just shut up,” which the rambling man took note of as he quickly piped down. (You took note of this situation and for future reference remembered not to ask them this question for the rest of the time you’d live this day.)

From there, you and the team spent the rest of the time trying to figure whatever it is before Steve had to leave with the stones. You only hoped that night everything would be normal or that this was really just a bad and very vivid dream. 

An extremely bad one.

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

Unfortunately, you awoke the next morning in the same position that you’d love to be in any other day, which was Steve’s arm cocooning you. 

Starting from today on and for the next ten days or so, you’d approach the day as such. 

In the morning, you’d try your hardest to convince Steve to not leave. 

He’d ask you why and you’d come up with some bullshit excuse, different from the day before, along with some puppy eyes that the man would just laugh at. As you pouted, he’d kiss your sulking lips and murmur “you’re so silly, doll.” 

No matter how many times you tried to convince him, he ironically always said that exact phrase in return.

Needless to say it was a bit annoying and you were tired of living the same day over and over again. Steve would never not do something for the world unless it meant hurting you. If only he knew that this simple act was like driving a knife straight through your heart. 

You tried to keep count of the amount of days on a piece of paper, but soon discovered that would be useless by day two since it just disappeared into thin air. 

Of all the days to relive, it just had to be the one where Steve vanished. Yet, no matter how many times you live that day, a pit of angst always settled in your stomach even though you knew what was to come later on that day. It was absolute torture seeing the love of your life perish  before you and you couldn’t do anything to change it. Sometimes at night, while you laid alone, you’d wonder why of all the days that it had to be this one. What had you done to piss off the universe so bad?

Finally, by what you assumed was day eight, you just accepted your fate and decided to just have some fun with it. If you were gonna have to suffer, you might as well make something out of the day. Granted you were gonna solve cancer or help homelessness because your efforts would be reset the “next” day. 

As the team prepared for Steve’s departure, you’d be out eating tons and tons of your favorite meals knowing that it wouldn’t affect you tomorrow. One day you even spontaneously caught a plane to some country you’d never even visited and just blew an unfathomable amount of money. On other days, you had also invested time and money into getting your hair done into impossible and whacky styles while simultaneously regretting not having painted your nails the day before. It was stupid to worry about or even bring up, but they were constantly chipped and it was aggravating to look at as you foolishly sped through the city in an expensive car that wouldn’t be yours tomorrow. 

What you were doing was absolutely careless, reckless and just downright out of character for anyone, especially you. Yet when you knew it all wouldn’t matter tomorrow, you carried on with your disregard for the world. Numb from the pain you were just trying to feel something. 

When it finally came time for Steve to leave, you’d bid him goodbye and when he vanished, you would see Sam, Bucky, and Bruce’s shocked expressions for what felt like the thousandth time. Honestly, you knew they wouldn’t remember and instead you’d just walk away, trying your best to not let your emotions jump out once more. You figured that after the tenth day, you were just desensitized and that you should be unaffected by now, when in reality you were still hurting. At this point, even though you got to spend time with Steve, your hours hurting outweighed your hours enjoying life. 

There was no use in any longer faking to yourself. The logic of “what you think is what you become,” wasn’t helping so you instead swallowed the bitter pill of reality and moved on. For real this time. 

You had finally come to accept that Steve was gonna be gone and no one knew when he’d come back, but you knew one thing.

The pain of constantly seeing him disappear, knowing there was nothing you could say or do to stop him because boy did you try, was much more profound than that of the pain you felt when he was just gone. There was more hope for him to return that way than not moving on at all. 

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

Somehow, by doing so and accepting the truth, the universe reset that night. 

You woke up and Steve wasn’t there.

For having lived the same day on repeat for at least 3 weeks time, you knew with absolute certainty that he was gonna be there. 

These people you’d been living were practically programmed with a script so there was surely no way anything could change unless…

“Hey (y/n) glad to see you are awake. We have some good news.” 

At that moment Sam popped his head in from the hallway and you couldn’t keep a smile at bay. 

It was finally a new day.

The man gave you a confused look, but was happy nonetheless to see you. 

“Wow, you seem pretty chipper for someone who has been through a lot in the past few hours. You good?” Sam came to your bedside and gave you a blueberry muffin wrapped in a thin napkin. It was hard to come by muffins in the compound, let alone breakfast at all, and you felt a ping of joy when you noticed that Sam remembered your favorite snack. He’d always have your back whether it was a muffin or a bullet. 

“It’s nothing. I am just happy that today is a new day and I can start with a clean slate.” Taking a bite into the muffin, you relished in the fresh and spongy cake while your conscience scolded you for not indulging in these during your everlasting day from hell. 

“I don’t know what’s gotten to you, but I am loving the cringe-worthy optimism. Speaking of which, I have something to add to that.” You ignored the subtle dig at your newfound look on life and rather keened in on the last half of his words. 

“Did you-” Tears started to brim your eyes. Happy ones. Soon your muffin was long forgotten as you threw off the covers and stood from the bed. Sam was quick to stand as well, steadying you when your sheets got tangled at your feet and you spun a bit. 

☆════ ⋆★⋆ ════☆

There he was. 

Your Steve was standing before you with a look of adoration on his face while his arms were wide open, beckoning you to him. 

“How?” A gasp of question fell from your lips and at this point you were sure your body and mind were gonna explode from this extra case of surprise, as if you hadn’t been through enough of that. It was astronomical that you could even feel that emotion at this point. 

“Scott discovered that we somehow ripped time?” You furrowed your brows and Steve continued on. “ When you all sent me back to return, I guess it was a bit miscalculated.” 

So it wasn’t all a dream? Could it really be that you had lived the same day on repeat? It was like someone had accidentally hit the repeat button for a song one too many times, but instead of a song, it was your life?

“Now I am not good with all the technical things, but apparently it stopped time in a way. Dr. Banner even said that it could have caused for some to experience some type of repetitive time abnormality!” Steve chuckled, not understanding a single word that he was saying to you. It was like a foreign language to him. He blamed it on being from a time where technology barely existed, but you and the rest of the team were quick to reassure him that it was confusing for all. 

“Oh, if only you all knew.” Wrapping your arms around Steve’s slim waist, you nestled your face into his chest, inhaling his cologne and embracing his warmth. Steve placed his lips on the crown on your head and you two stayed that way for an eternity,

One day maybe you’d tell them the story, but for now you were gonna relish in the time you had with Steve. If you had learned anything from your experience, it was that time was a tricky thing and that you shouldn’t hold a grudge as life did on you for that day. You will never make any progress if you do. Live in the moment and roll with the punches life throws in your direction. 

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[penguinwithitsarseonfire]

It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Pairing: Tenth Doctor x Reader

Word Count: 1,839

Warnings: None

Summary: You and Rose apply makeup before The Doctors self proclaimed “theatre event” that he’s taking you to. When the Doctor comes in to complain about the amount of time you’ve taken, you and Rose pull a small prank on him. That’s it, that’s the plot.

A/N: This was completely self indulgent, I've wanted to be Rose’s best friend since I was 9, so that’s basically all this is.

You hummed along to the music playing softly in the background. It had been a fair while since you had listened to early 2000’s music; travelling on the TARDIS didn’t leave much time for nostalgia, what with the different planets, the aliens, and completely different time periods from when your existence wasn’t even a sparing thought.

Still though, it was nice to take a break every now and again.

“It’s not really nostalgia though, is it,” Rose said from beside you after you brought it up. “I mean, this song’s only a year or so old. We used to play it in the shop.”

“Before it blew up.”

“Ha yeah,” Rose grinned. “Before it blew up.”

“Although,” you raised an eyebrow at her and reiterated the year you were from. “It’s definitely nostalgia.”

Rose rolled her eyes good naturedly, then pointed to the vanity next to you. “Can you pass the eyeliner over?”

You hummed and reached over to the one she was pointing at; it was an eyeliner pencil, a black one with a little sharpener on the lid.

It sat on a vanity made of warm mahogany wood, among a myriad of makeup from foundations, eye shadow palettes, lipsticks, and rouge.

Beside it and in front of you and Rose was a large mirror that ran from the floor to the ceiling, on the only solid wall in the TARDIS’ wardrobe. You and Rose liked to think The TARDIS had made the area specially for you both, so you could do your makeup together.

You plopped back down onto the floor and passed the eyeliner to Rose, who was sitting cross legged and doing the finishing touched to her foundation.

You were poised to go to a theatre event - what it was exactly, the Doctor wouldn’t tell you. It didn’t matter if you often wore makeup often or not, right now, you were feeling it, and you figured a theatre event was a nice opportunity to change things up a bit.

You frowned at the eye shadow palette in front of you, trying to work out which colours would blend the best and how you could actually use it.

You jumped as one of your favourite songs from the early 2000’s began playing, turning to Rose with a grin. She was looking at you with an equally bright smile, her right eye only half painted with the eyeliner pencil left dangling in her hand. Almost instinctually you both broke out into song, singing along terribly.

Your voice cracked at one of the high notes, and Rose laughed, shaking you lightly as she continued. The make-up was forgotten as the pair of you danced, moving in a way that was particularly reminiscent of some sort of Tik Tok routine.

Not that you would tell Rose that particular tidbit, it was a bit early to explain Tik Tok to her.

At the end of the chorus Rose stumbled with her words over the lyrics. It was so surprising that it shocked you out of your exuberance, and the pair of you were left giggling on the floor. The song played in the background, a harmony to your laughter.

The Doctor cleared his throat, and you reached over in between your laughter to turn the music down. From this angle you could see him clearly, he was leaning against a poll behind you, sans coat, with only two of the buttons on his pinstripe suit done up.

You gazed at Rose, who raised her eyebrow at you and smirked playfully. “Did’ja need us Doctor?” She turned back to the mirror, applying her eyeliner and trying to stifle her laughter.

“Dunno,” he said. You looked up at his reflection in the mirror in front of you, locking eyes with you, and he winked, before heaving himself off the poll. “You two’ve been taking an awful long time.”

“What,” you said, and passed Rose her mascara wand, placing the eye shadow back onto the shelf. You’d keep things more natural and match Rose. “You’ve been bored?”

“What – me? Nah, I’m never bored.”

You let out a brief laugh. “Ah yep, that’s completely accurate.”

“Well, again,” The Doctor said. “You both have been gone for a while.”

Rose snorted and picked up your phone, glancing at the display. “We’ve only been about 20 minutes. You’re getting more impatient by the day.”

“Impatient, oh now that’s nonsense,” he drawled and crouched down behind you both. “Now, what are we doing here?”

You waved your eyeliner pen in front of him, and then began drawing on a wing. “You said theatre event so here we are,” you gestured at you and Rose with your free hand. “Getting ready for a theatre event.”

Rose said her thanks for the mascara and began applying her first coat, chewing on her lip as she did so.

You glanced at her out of the corner of your eye then back at your reflection as you filled your eyeliner in, before starting on your other eye. “How many coats of that do you do anyway?”

Rose hummed. “Dunno, however many I need until I think it looks good.”

You chuckled. It was just so early 2000’s of her. Sometimes, your eyelids looked heavy just looking at her eyelashes.  

Rose looked at you aghast. “What’s funny?”

“Nothing, nothing at all,” you poked your tongue to your teeth as you smiled at her reflection in the mirror. “I was just thinking of makeup trends, how things change.”

“Y’know sometimes, you can be as cryptic as him,” she gestured to The Doctor with her head for good measure, and set out a couple different shades of rouge as the next coat of mascara dried.

The Doctor gawped. “When am I ever cryptic?”

Both you and Rose paused what you were doing so you could stare down his reflection in the mirror.

“Alright fine,” he relented. “I guess sometimes I change the topic of a conversation.” The Doctor cocked his head to the side, watching you both thoughtfully as the pair of you continued on with your makeup. “Why do you both always need to do this, anyway?"

Rose was applying another coat of mascara when she replied. "Come off, you're not having a go at us for wearing makeup now, are you?"

"No, no, not at all, just curious really. I should start factoring this extra time in when I take you two places, because blimey you take a while.” He looked towards the vanity. "And that's a fair amount of it all too, do you really use all of that?"

You stuck your eyeliner pen out as if it were a rod. “Says the man with a collection of hair gel for his gravity defying hair – oh, and could you pass me those eyelashes over there?"

You gestured to the vanity and The Doctor’s gaze followed.

“Eyelashes,” he drawled, standing up and meandering over. You watched his reflection as his hands danced over the various products, until he landed on the pair of false lashes you’d been hoping to apply. He lifted it up, meeting your gaze through the mirror. “These ones?”

You hummed and made a grabbing motion with your hands. “Yeah, thanks.”

The Doctor resumed his crouched position behind you and Rose, and passed you the small box. Your fingers brushed over his lightly as you grabbed the small parcel. You felt a jolt run up through your fingers and up your arm and heard his breath hitch slightly. You took the box out of his grasp and swallowed, ignoring whatever that was.

“False eyelashes,” The doctor grinned, and ran his fingers over his cheek. You tried not think about why he was doing that, it was awfully distracting. “You humans I swear sometimes you do the strangest things. It’s bloody brilliant.”

Rose grinned, and locked eyes with you, holding up the her blush compact and a brush. She nodded her head to the Doctor and you returned her grin, giving her subtle thumbs up.

“It’s not that strange,” you said, distracting the Doctor so he wasn’t watching what Rose was doing. “It’s basically just experimentation, or just making yourself feel prettier.”

Rose swooped in, poking some of her chosen blush onto The Doctors nose.  “You could probably do with some pretty-ing up every now and again yourself.”

He scrunched his face up in protest.

You snorted, laughing at The Doctors reaction, and letting the magnetic eyelashes clip onto your eyes. You blinked a couple of times, letting your eyes adjust to the added weight.

Rose looked to you with a frown. “Wait, don’t you need glue with that?”

You winked at her. “They’re magnetic.”

“Could say the same about you,” The Doctor grinned that ever so charming smile at you, the one that would make you all flustered if you didn’t know any better.

You let a solitary bark of laughter. “That was a terrible pun. It’s a wonder anyone ever takes you seriously,” you grinned to match him. “You look sunburnt, by the way.”

Rose laughed and The Doctor’s hand flew to cover his nose. “Oi, that wasn’t necessary!”

He rubbed at his nose furiously and Rose fell into a pit of laughter. “I ‘spose I could have chosen a different colour.”

“Well Rose,” you eyed the palette, then turned back to her. “It looks great on you.”

The Doctor hummed, pulling his hand away. The rouge was gone. “Maybe I’m just not meant to be ‘pretty-ed up’ like the pair of you.”

“Oh,” you drawled. “So we’re meant to be ‘pretty-ed up’ then? Is that it?”

The Doctor spluttered, his eyes growing like saucers. “What? No, that’s – that’s not what I meant at all, you’ve always been pretty, still are of course, with or without the,” he gestured at your face. “Well, you know.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Are you alright, Doctor?”

Rose met your eyes and smirked playfully. “Looks like someone is a little bit flustered.”

The Doctor jumped up, suddenly, as if eager to get a move on. “Well come on you two, this is a time machine, we haven’t got all day!”

You frowned for a moment. “I think that’s the exact opposite of what the phrase ‘time machine’ suggests.”

Rose laughed, sticking out her hand for you to take. “Let’s humour him, shall we.”

“Oh I’m standing right here,” The Doctor said and turned around to take off. He spun back round just as fast, and met your gaze. “And flustered – me? Never,” he tapped against his temple. “I’ve always got a plan up in here.”

He gave you both a cheeky wave and shot off again, giving you no time at all to process what the hell he just said.

You clutched against Rose with one hand, fumbling as you placed the false lashes box back on the vanity. “What do you mean you’ve got a plan?” You called after him. “A plan for what?”

Rose just laughed beside you, and tugged you along. “Well come on, let’s find out then!”

A/N: This isn’t really what I wanted to post this week, but I haven’t had time to write anything new so here’s something from the drafts. I hope you enjoyed it!

[baekberrie]

paracetamol - bbh

Characters: Baekhyun x Reader

Genre: Romance, slight angst and fluff

Au!s: Single dad au, best friends au

Sypnosys: Baekhyun, a bright, kind and beautiful person inside out, had always found himself strong enough to carry everything on his own sturdy shoulders. But as his daughter one day finds him in the middle of a breakdown, he admits that perhaps, he's not completely fine- and not as strong as he thought. Baekhyun, a twenty-eight-year-old single dad that finds himself struggling to raise his daughter, gets a  proposal from his bestfriend to finally start letting in new people in his life, meeting women on dates you had set him up with. But just as things fall into place- they fall apart on the other side.

Making him realize that he had been trying to build the wrong puzzle all along.

Making you realize that the puzzle you were making him build was one you wouldn't be a piece of. One you couldn't help him build anymore.

If you took two paracetamol pills from 500mg, would it be the same as 1000mg? Would they ever be enough to ease the ache in your chest?

"Beware of butterflies, they'll break your heart."

Was it the extremely lonely moon that had smitten him with its melancholy? Or perhaps the gentle rain tapping onto the window, inducing him to feel just as small, just as vulnerable. The tears welling up in Baekhyun's eyes were small but full of sorrow. A sorrow that controlled his voice into subtle cries that he so wanted to swallow back down his throat, a sorrow that made his body tremble.

Baekhyun was someone that always smiled, for the people around him, for himself, for his daughter. As bright as the sun, he was. Cheerful like the summer, he was. He was organized and had everything under control.

But for tonight, he couldn't control his emotions. As much as he wanted to stop crying and be stronger, the sudden wave of overwhelming feelings had unexpectedly come crashing down upon him. Until now, Baekhyun had always done his best to be the greatest version of himself, so that he could give his only daughter the best life, even without a mother. In fact, he had to say, things had gone surprisingly well and nothing like what he had imagined when his lover had suddenly left him and their daughter without notice, without explanations. It would've been a lie if he said he hadn't gone through a harsh period where he'd constantly be tested by depression, loneliness, and hopelessness. But he had had his sources of light. His daughter that day by day grew so quickly yet beautifully, had always been was what drove him forward, what prevented him from giving up so many times. And then there had been you. You and your endless will to help him with his needs as a single dad, your strengthening friendship, and your comforting smiles.

Despite the hardships he had faced, Baekhyun always considered himself extremely blessed, for he had a beautiful daughter that he truly, loved with his whole being- a daughter that solely could bring him so much happiness to last for an eternity. A loving family and precious friends that took care of him, and he took care of them. With all of these things, he would never allow himself to feel sad, broken, or lonely. It felt extremely wrong and ungrateful. Baekhyun could just not accept the fact that he too, was not endlessly strong. Just like everybody else, he had a breaking point. Now, he had finally reached it.

The twenty-nine-year-old man did not hear the little girl silently pushing his door that had been ajar, open. There would be times where his daughter wouldn't be able to sleep and seek for her dad, and she was so tiny, so he would purposely never close the door completely so that she could come in without hinders. Standing on her tippy toes, she took tiny steps to the king-sized bed that really, wasn't too big, but looked immense in her tired eyes. A little clumsily, she climbed onto the bed and plopped down next to Baekhyun, tugging gently at the sleeve of his pajamas while rubbing her eye with the other hand. Shocked to be caught in such a vulnerable moment, Baekhyun almost jumped away from the child but visibly relaxed when he saw her.

"S-sweetheart, what are you doing here?" His trembling voice gave him away, but he didn't think that his daughter would catch on it. He was wrong, for before she could even think about answering, she had already noticed the salty stains of his tears reflecting in the moonlight. The little girl almost tripped when standing up, but stubbornly caught her balance again before walking to stand in front of her father.

"Why is daddy crying?" Came her small voice, full of concern, "Did you have a nightmare?" Her arms were stretched towards him, she obviously wanted to throw them around his neck, but they were too short. The sight melted Baekhyun's heart instantly and without making her wait, he pulled her onto his lap. She hadn't been too far from right when she mentioned a nightmare, although he had been awake, the painful feelings chasing his sleep away certainly felt like one.

"Dad is okay, don't worry, hmm?" Baekhyun made sure to sound the sweetest so that he wouldn't worry her, but sometimes he underestimated the maturity of his daughter. Sure, she was still incredibly young, but every day she showed him how intelligent she was, understanding many things right away. A confused frown made its way on his face when all she did was puff her rosy cheeks with air, a bit annoyed, for that matter.

"Daddy, you not so good at lying, you know?" Once again, he was to be astonished by his own daughter. The incredulous expression on her soft features alone was able to make him forget about his anxieties. He had no idea how to respond to that, much less to the way she had started looking at him so intently. He felt slightly awkward when her chocolate brown eyes that resembled his moved all over his face for a good minute. Soon enough though, a hint of hesitation began polling within them as she started fidgeting nervously with her tiny, chubby fingers.

"Are you missing mommy?" Her voice had been so small, almost inaudible when asking the question, always afraid that the topic would sadden Baekhyun further. Early in her life, she had learned that she was slightly different from the other children because she did not have a mother. At first, it had been hard to digest the fact that everybody she knew had a mother except for her...But it did not last long, she had immensely shocked Baekhyun when she with her slightly broken language told him that she didn't mind after all, since he had always been there and it was enough.

Baekhyun vigorously shook his head at the question. What happened had by now taken place a long time ago and you could say that Baekhyun had learned to accept the way his story with the mother of his daughter had ended. He taught himself that it would never be worth it to hurt for someone who after all, did not love them enough to stay. The feelings of sorrow and heartbreak in her regards had with time morphed into something a loving person like Baekhyun would not usually carry in his heart. Rage. In fact, there would be moments when in his thoughts, he'd go back to all the good times lived together until he reached the abrupt end, and despite himself, he couldn't help but feel so angered, so disappointed. Wondering whether he had never been enough to her? And their daughter? Hadn't she meant anything for her to leave like that? What hurt the most was knowing that none of these questions were ever going to be answered. Though maybe, it was better that way. He had let it go, so there was no reason for him to reminisce about it. Sometimes though, he couldn't help it.

He brought a hand to brush the wild locks of his daughter away from her face, adoringly cupping her soft, soft cheek. "Do you? Are you sad?" He murmured, searching for an answer in her demeanor, but it was not needed because just like he had, she shook her head fervently.

"No, daddy is all I need." Sparkling adoration reflected on her face while from Baekhyun's eyes dripped honey as his lips curled in the happiest smile. A certain feeling bloomed within his chest, as if there were two hearts swelling next to each other, a kind of love and adoration that would steal his breath away. Swiftly, he put two hands underneath each of her armpits and lifted her up slightly, bringing her closer. Excited gurgles were echoing in the walls at the sudden move. He pressed a chaste kiss to her tiny lips and hugged the child to his chest, to which she happily snuggled into.

"You're my angel. Dad is so lucky to have you, you know that right?" She could only nod on his chest, her tiny fingers tightened around his shirt.

"Can I sleep here with dad?" Her head tilted upward to steal a glance at the male. Despite the sleep threatening to take over, for her, he pulled the brightest smile he could muster. Placing another kiss on the crown of her hair, he whispered a gentle; "Of course honey."

---

The clock was nearing noon when you got a text from Baekhyun asking you to pick up his daughter from kindergarten since he would be late. A smile instantly crossed your lips upon seeing the name of his contact, but also because you couldn't wait to see the baby girl again. She was the brightest ray of sun and her smile would always succeed to melt you into a puddle, not to mention the affection she held for you, it made you feel so extremely blessed to have the trust of such a gleeful child. The excitement was buzzing through your veins and you were hurrying to the destination, impatient to see what Sarang's reaction would be upon having you surprising her. She didn't know that it would be you to pick her up, and any time you had done it this way, her happy shrieks had always filled the playground.

It wasn't much different this time either. When Sarang saw you walking through the gates of her kindergarten, your name had been shrieked from the top of her lungs and before you had even known it, her short arms were circling your leg for a hug. You neither could help the endeared chuckles leaving your lips as you crouched down to her level so that you could bring her into your arms. "And how is my princess doing?" You cooed excitedly while the two of you went to get her things.

"Good!" She exclaimed, though the bright smile soon died down and was replaced by a frown on her lips. "But daddy has been a bit sad," Sarang revealed, the concern for her father was extremely obvious on her soft features.

"Yeah? What has happened to dad, hm?" You were to be disappointed when the girl only shrugged her small shoulders. Usually, you would know better than to worry over things children would say, though Sarang, was extremely mature for her age. Something truly wasn't right if it worried her. "Will you help him?"She suddenly said, begging you with her glossy eyes that prompted you to plant a reassuring kiss on her head. "Of course," You said, "Best friend on a mission!" You formed your hand into a fist and brought it forward as if you were superman, sprinting the way to your car, happy to hear Sarang giggling at the thrilling feeling of the wind against her face.

You had only started parking when Sarang had already begun begging you to let her unlock the door herself since she found it so incredibly fun and fascinating to insert the key into the lock and twist it. With a grin on your face, you fished out the extra pair of keys to their home that Baekhyun had given you from the very start and handed them to her. The metallic gadgets noisily dangled from her fingers while she skipped her way to the front door, bouncing excitedly on her feet when waiting for you so that you could lift her up, she wasn't tall enough after all.

By now, you had spent so much time with Baekhyun and Sarang that you had basically seen her grow, and that meant that you also knew what her routines were every day. Grabbing the sweet flavored yogurt from the fridge together with some fruits, you made her an afternoon snack that would later do its magic on sending her into napping mode. Half an hour later, the little girl was falling into a peaceful slumber, scrambled on the couch while her favorite cartoon played in the background. You couldn't help the smile crossing your lips. She was utterly adorable. With the soft sneers leaving her pouty lips and her long eyelashes casting a long shadow down her rosy cheeks. Ever so carefully, you picked her up in your embrace and almost melted when she automatically nuzzled her face into your neck, fisting your shirt with her little hand. You wouldn't have minded having her nap huddled in your embrace like that, but you found it better for Sarang to sleep on an actual, comfortable bed. So that was where you brought her; to her bedroom, tucked safely in the comfort of her fluffy pink sheets.

An hour had finally passed, and somehow it had felt way slower than it should've, but you figured that it was probably because you had spent it doing absolutely nothing, in a house that wasn't yours. To your relief though, you heard the lock to the door click open and shuffling footsteps entered the apartment. There was no doubt of who it was, without exaggerations, you would always know when it was him. Even the pattern of his footsteps was recognizable to you.

You left the couch to greet him and as soon as you were visible, he discarded the exhausted look from his face, just so that he could warm you up with his smile. The action tugged a tiny part of your chest, he was back from an extremely long day at work and the dark circles underneath his eyes were revealing it all. But nonetheless, he found it more important to make you comfortable with a smile rather than letting you see his exhaustion. In all honestly, you weren't sure whether to find that admirable or scold him because he was putting too much pressure on himself all the time.

"Com' here," You chimed knowingly, gesturing for him to follow you. The man trailed with small footsteps behind you as if a puppy, silently obeying when you gestured for him to sit on the couch while you walked around it. A thankful sigh pushed past his lips when your fingers gently dug into his shoulders, melting the tensing knots underneath his skin that had built during the day.

"How are you?" You murmured, genuinely wanting to know about his day, about his feelings. Whenever you'd ask him this, it would never be out of courtesy. There was just something about Baekhyun's soft, soothing voice telling you about his adventures that made you want to listen to every single word he had to say. But today, your motive was different. As your hands massaged his shoulders, Sarang's words echoed in your head, making you wonder whether Baekhyun would ever feel comfortable enough to talk about it with you. The question was answered by the defeated sigh he let out when throwing his head back against the couch, the crown of his head coming to contact with your abdomen. The gel that had been brushed through his locks was now worn off, barely holding together the wildness of his hair, which only made your fingers painfully long to thread through those chocolate strands of his. Baekhyun's eyes were shut close in exhaustion as he forced himself to speak through the tiredness.

"Sarang caught me in the middle of a breakdown." He confirmed what the little girl had told you earlier, and although the tone in his voice was merely a breathy whisper, you still caught onto the disappointment he felt towards himself. Knowing the man, he was probably considering himself a failure for letting his daughter see him in such a vulnerable state.

"A father is supposed to be a strong figure in their child's eyes, someone who can be strong enough to support them whenever someone who is wise. And yet here I am, failing miserably." Dejection coated his words as he let out the burdens weighing down on his heart. His gentle and fragile heart that had been wounded so deeply. "What do I even do?" He exasperated, "I want to give her everything. I want her to feel safe. I want to give her the mother she has a right to, the peaceful and happy childhood she deserves. But things are just so damn complicated, I-" His breath got caught in his lungs when feeling a familiar overwhelmedness of emotions threatening to crush him.

"How am I going to handle all of that?" It physically pained you to see Baekhyun in such a despaired state. Solely the way he was leaning his elbows onto his knees, stressfully hiding his face in his palm radiated such an amount of anxiousness that could've made you fall into the same pit of darkness just by looking at him. Baekhyun had been there for you every time you had needed him. You were not going to let him down.

Not a second was wasted and by the time he blinked, you were already there next to him. Fingertips running soothingly through his hair while your other hand guided his head to rest on your soft chest, to which he complied immediately. A content yet trembling whimper left his lips at the warmth and comfort of your embrace, his nose traced its way to the crook of your neck where he could inhale the sweetness of your perfume mixed with fabric softener.

"I don't want to be so vulnerable. I'm sorry you're always here to witness me being so weak." Again, Baekhyun couldn't help but resent himself for his overflowing flaws and imperfections he couldn't get a hold of no matter what. "No, don't say that Baekhyun. I'm thankful to be able to be the one helping you in any kind of situation." Perhaps you had let on too much? But this was what you felt. As his best friend, just the thoughts of him being comforted by someone else would spark some kind of jealousy within you, because you wanted to be the one to anchor him at any time.

"Maybe it's time that you start letting new people into your life again?" You pondered out loud while your fingers twirled around Baekhyun's satin-like curly brown locks, earning nothing but a frustrated groan. "Minseok's been saying that for weeks, to try dating and all that." By the irritated undertone in his voice, you could tell that he was indeed not keen on letting new females in his life yet.

"I've been considering it, but I don't want this to turn into Sarang feeling neglected either," Baekhyun expressed his worries while lifting his head from your chest so that he could look at you instead, letting you view the worry swimming in his dark pools.

"It doesn't have to turn out like that, I'll be with Sarang whenever it's needed," You suggested, giving his cheek a gentle caress. With a sigh, he leaned into your touch. "You shouldn't have to do that as often as you already do, she's my responsibility, not yours."

"Baek, you also deserve to find your happiness." At that, all he did was bit his lips, the war in his head visible from his troubled orbs. "Everything will be okay," You assured, "I'll find some impeccable dates for you and we'll start simply, hm? How does that sound?"The male contemplated your proposal with a skeptical look on his face which made you roll your eyes dramatically.

"Oh stop it, you can trust me!"

"Fine, fine."

***

"Wow! Daddy so handsom!!" Came Sarang's high pitched gurgle at the view of her father. You had to second her on that. With his curls resting on his forehead in such a youthful way, the light jeans and the collar of a button-up peeking from the sweater made him look absolutely irresistible. With a chuckle, baekhyun kneeled down to pick the girl up, resting her comfortably on his hip and placing the sweetest kiss on her temple, making you almost squeal out loudly at the view. "Really?" he chimed sweetly, earning a few excited nods, to which he laughed.

"Thank you, princess." Although the fondness in his voice as he spoke to his daughter, the nervousness and distress were limpidly reflecting in his orbs, and you found yourself softening before him, you found absolutely no reason for him to feel all the worry he was feeling.

"Be confident Baekhyun," You said once he'd put Sarang down, letting her run off to play. "You're such a handsome and charming man, with beautiful qualities. You have it all." You murmured with so much adoration and sincerity, maybe even too much because your heart had started swelling in your chest upon speaking such words. The fact that you would always know what he was feeling before him saying it first would never stop astonishing him. Relief washed over his features and he allowed himself to step a little closer. For a second, you thought you had forgotten how to breathe, when his lips had caressed ever so gently to your cheek, pressing one or two kisses before leaning back and eyeing you with a  heartbreaking smile that neither you could run away unaffected from, while breathing the sweetest "Thank you," you had ever had directed towards yourself.

After one last brief goodbye, which was the thirteenth as well, he finally left the apartment, leaving you to sigh heavily and praying in your mind that everything could go well. That he wouldn't close himself if the first tries wouldn't work out. You knew that Baekhyun could turn out to be very sensitive after what had happened to him. While keeping him in your mind, you called out of Sarang, and the little girl appeared soon, giggling and smiling she jumped in your arms. "Shall we start our ladies' night!?" You cooed excitedly, prompting her to squeal and gesticulate enthusiastically, her happy antics would never fail to put your worries at bay, spreading nothing but warmth in your chest. The Barbie movie she adored so much had just started playing when she suddenly turned in her embrace, curiosity shining in her droopy eyes that were just like his. You quirked a questioning eyebrow and Sarang let out a small giggle, "Is daddy going to fall in love?" the thought of her dad going out to 'fall in love' as her sweet innocence made her see it, seemed to excite her a lot. A soft smile fell on your lips as a hand caressed her soft tresses gently. "Hopefully," You replied, only thinking that it would be beautiful if he could fall in love, it would be amazing if love didn't come with pain.

It really would be. And you hoped that for Baekhyun who deserved it more than anyone else.

30 minutes into the third movie was when you finally felt your eyes getting droopy. Initially, you had tried making the baby girl go to sleep already after the second movie, but she had insisted to stay awake until her daddy came back and wouldn't take a no for an answer. Until a few moments ago, she had been bouncing like an energetic bunny and you couldn't understand how she had all of that energy when you hadn't even given her any sweets yet. Though now, it seemed as if her body was slowly giving in to the tiredness, but obviously enough, she fought it as hard as she could to finish watching the romantic animated film. You suppressed the laugh at her funny expression, flushed chubby cheeks and brows arched into a frown, her eyes glaring really intensely at the huge TV screen as if it would chase her sleepiness away.

But you ended up being no better as you had ended up falling asleep with her on the couch. Her little body in a fetal position as she had in her sleep snuggled into your laying body. Sarang's head rested on your chest while her tiny fists grabbed onto the hoody enveloping your body, its scent was bound to make her lean closer into it. In fact, it wasn't even yours,  you hadn't been able to find a darn blanket in the whole house, and Sarang had been of no help either, but you couldn't blame the girl for not knowing where her dad hid things. And that was why you had stolen one from his closet, choosing the biggest out of them all, knowing that Baekhyun would probably not mind you doing that.

You did not know for how long you had been asleep when you were suddenly woken up by feeling Sarang being lifted from next to you. A loud gasp left your lips as you sat up abruptly, looking around frantically, your mind still numb because of the sleep.

"Hey, shh, it's me," Came a hushed whisper to which you recognized the voice. A gentle hand placed itself on your cheek, turning you to look in their direction. Your eyes were still wide with shock as you eyed the Baekhyun who was currently pressing his lips into a thin line so that he wouldn't let out the laugh in his throat and wake up Sarang. The mischievousness was a permanent glint in his eyes as he then patted down your wild locks.

"Go back to sleep, it's okay," He said with a smirk on his face although his voice was nothing but soothing and gentle. When he saw that you still wouldn't budge from your current position, he shifted the sleeping Sarang slightly in his embrace, reaching out with his hand to your shoulder, pushing you gently to lay back down. "Sleep," He murmured one last time while his hand had traveled from your shoulder to give your cheek that was by now, flushed by the hot temperature, a soft caress that induced your heavy eyelids to droop back close. All you could really decipher at that moment was the question swirling in your head, wondering whether you were going to remember these few interactions tomorrow morning.

***

The sound of your name being called by an angel-like voice reached your ears, though, you were pretty sure it was part of the beautiful dream you were having while basking in the warmth of the sun-rays peeking from the curtains, but most of all, completely immersed in a familiar scent, a homely and ridiculously good one. It wasn't yours, and at the moment you had no idea who it might've belonged to but you knew, in your state of sleepiness that you didn't want to get out of it. Eventually, you were forced out of your sleep when you were shaken awake. You had difficulty opening your heavy eyes but it soon passed when the first thing you saw was his almond-shaped, droopy eyes gazing down at you.  It was when a soft smile crept on his lips that you finally realized how you weren't in your own bed, nor the couch you had fallen asleep on yesterday. Mainly, that the sweet, comforting scent you had been engulfed in this time not only derived from the oversized hoody you were wearing but from the fluffy white sheets surrounding you on the king-sized bed you could've only wished you could ever afford.

"Baek," You sleepily whined with disbelief while rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. "You gave me your bed again." You stated. "Why did you move me from the couch? You should've used the bed instead!" First thing in the morning, you found yourself scolding Baekhyun for being overly selfless. You had felt how tense his back had been with knotted muscles just a few days ago, and there he was, giving away a well-needed sleep so that you could've been more comfortable. As much as this could be considered a good quality, you couldn't help but sometimes feel that Baekhyun was way too generous for his own good. The male sitting on the free space next to you on the bed did not even comment on what you had just said, letting your words fade into thin air.

"Did you sleep well?" He questioned instead, blinking his puppy eyes ever so innocently and you could only groan out loudly. "Nggh, I can't handle you," You lamented into the fabric of his hoody. "Don't be like that, you know I like doing these things." Baekhyun insisted.

"Yes, but it shouldn't cost you your health, Baekhyun!" You almost hissed, rasping your dry throat in the process. The slight harshness in your tone managed to quieten Baekhyun who only looked down in his laps.

"But you were so deeply asleep, I couldn't bring myself to wake you up or to let you be uncomfortable on the sofa!" Baekhyun continued to argue after a small moment of silence, his pouty lips tilting into a sulky frown. "Plus...You were starting to drool and that couch isn't exactly cheap, you know," he eventually admitted what might have been his main reason, leaving you to flush deep red with embarrassment, finding no other solution than to hide your face in his pillow. "Why did you tell me that, gosh." you groaned while suppressing the bubbling urge to scream into the pillow as well, but you decided that you had embarrassed yourself enough to do that too.

Baekhyun only giggled in response, muttering a quick: "Just kidding," To which you reacted faster than he'd expected when you threw your pillow at him, earning a girly yell from the almost thirty-year-old man. Suddenly, as if lightning had struck you, you calmed immediately down.

"How did the date go?!" You exclaimed excitedly as you crawled closer to him. Baekhyun seemed startled by your sudden mood swings for a moment but got over it quickly. You understood that something was off when Baekhyun gave you an uncertain cringe in response.

"It went well until I mentioned Sarang," He confessed, finally letting go of his usual worry-free facade and allowing the defeated look he'd been holding back take over his features, shoulders slumping together and eyebrows bent with frustration, forming a crease on his forehead. His pink lips pouty and begging for comfort, but you immediately took your eyes elsewhere to keep your thoughts about Baekhyun's lips at bay. And that, ladies and gentlemen, was the main struggle of having an attractive best friend, but that was a story for another time.

"Oh," You cooed, "Baekhyun, it's not your fault, please don't beat yourself up about it." You tried to console him but to no avail. Truthfully, there wasn't much you could do if women were scared away by the fact that he already had a child. But you still tried to ease his worries. Letting out a soft breath, you mustered a smile that you hoped could relieve him, your hand gently rubbing his arm.

"I believe that maybe, you should wait for a few dates in before speaking up about your family, so that the girl can get to know you for you, without any prejudices they may come up with beforehand. Hm?" The suggestion didn't sound illogical as Baekhyun contemplated it, eventually nodding hastily, "You're right," He agreed with a smile.

"Good, then I'll set a date with your next candidate later on today."

***

Every challenge in life was bound to be a bumpy road that would cause one to stumble, and even fall on the way. But never would it be impossible to go through. You had experienced that and strongly stood by that statement. Though, even you felt the tiniest hint of hope slip through your fingers when Baekhyun had one night returned from his date with a second match that you had found him, rather defeated. The girl had right after their first meeting rejected the idea of getting to know him further, and to your relief this time it hadn't been because of Sarang. Somehow, you found yourself appreciating the girl's honesty and confidence, she knew what she wanted and when she didn't find it in Baekhyun (which left you quite baffled because he was perfect) she ended things before they could go too far. It had taken a few tries to convince Baekhyun to not give up, trying to make him understand that sometimes it could take longer to find a great match. The whole blind date situation though slowly started to become less appealing to him. He had sighed heavily when saying that he didn't like to hurry and force such processes in his life that were supposed to take its time to come.

It was because of that when he entered the apartment with a wide grin on his face, you hadn't known better than to excitedly squeal and jump in his arms. You could feel his smile on your skin as he tightened his arms around you.

"Did you get a second date?" You questioned, loosening the hug ever so slightly so that you could take in the joyful expression on his face. The male gave you a dreamy grin and nodded with a childish innocence that made your heart swell with warmth. Something poked into your thoughts,  something you couldn't put a finger on. It didn't feel positive, so you waved it away and concentrated on the happiness that hadn't taken place on his face for a long time now.

"I'm so happy for you Baek," You smiled, caressing his arm affectionately, "How was she?" You wondered curiously and his smile seemed to widen at the mention of the amazing girl he had just gone on a date with. You were happy to see this kind of expression display so mindlessly on his beautiful features. He truly deserved to be happy.

"She's beautiful and easygoing, which was such a relief. I felt comfortable right away. All in all, it was like a breath of fresh air. Obviously, I can't either of us have feelings yet, but I think there's a potential between us." Baekhyun explained, and you found a part of his sentence rather relieving- for a reason to you unknown but you decided not to dwell on it.

"I'm glad you liked her, I'm rooting for you!" You cheered with the most delightful expression you could muster, you wanted him to know that whatever he would do, that you would be there to support him. You wanted to see him smile, like this, every day. And if this girl would be the reason for it, then so be it. Thankfulness and adoration swam in his oceans as he took in the bright smile on your face, his expression almost having a sad twinge to it, but perhaps you were just seeing things wrong. Without a warning, he pulled you into another embrace- a silent one and yet so incredibly emotional as he pressed you to his chest, making you wonder where the butterflies fluttering in your belly came from- you had never had them before.

"Thank you." He breathed out, and his long eyelashes caressed the surface of your neck, "I appreciate everything you're doing for me. I want to give you just as much back, I promise that I'll do it."

"Baekhyun." His name tasted as always, just so sweet on your tongue, but as you had a slightly warning tone in your voice, today it felt also a bit sour. "You don't have to do anything. I'm doing this as your best friend because I want to. It's not something you'll owe me later. Okay? Please don't feel that way when you're with me. Whatever I give, just take, take. Please." You could only beg him, for once you wanted to be one to be unconditionally giving to him- it was an urge, a sensation that surged from the deepest part of your heart. Something you had to fulfill.

Tickling. An intense tickling took place in your tummy once again when the male tightened his arms that were laced around your waist, making it possible for you to feel his heartbeat against your raging one. Soon, they melted together into one unstable melody as your heart was beating so incredibly fast- crashing and rebelling against your thoughts, without your permission skipping exciting beats. This hug had by long surpassed the line between friendly and something more.

"No." Baekhyun murmured soothingly into your ear and unwillingly sent shivers thundering down your spine when the tips of his lips brushed ever so slightly against the shell of your ear, leaving no space for interjections.

Why was he like this?

Why was your heart like this? Beating at a speed of a thousand, you couldn't keep up, you felt out of breath.

You couldn't keep up.

***

The third girl you had set up with Baekhyun was just a few years younger than him. The two seemed to have clicked just perfectly as one date had turned into two- and two into three, into regular meets almost every day. Often, you found yourself babysitting the little Sarang, these days barely getting to see the man as he'd be out by the time you'd reach his house. You should've been happy for him, that finally, he had someone who wanted to commit themselves to him, that there was someone who loved making him feel like he mattered, but why was it that there was not even a crumb of happiness in his regards? It drove you to despise yourself, never had you thought that you could've been so cruel, so cold at heart, and for what exactly? For what reason? You missed him, sure, but you didn't believe that explained the clenching fingers clawing at your chest whenever you'd enter his damned house. The joy of babysitting the ray of sunshine had dissipated into nothingness and you had no idea how to make yourself grasp at any kind of motivation to keep going. But a part of you still fought, at least for the little Sarang who deserved anything she could get, truly. You could see it in her now saddened doll-eyes, that she too felt unusually lonely.

The moments where you'd babysit Sarang had morphed into the most dreaded hours of the day. It was as if a part of your conscious insisted for you to fight against the longing toward Baekhyun, a sensation that begged you to stay in your home, telling you that if you refused to help him out- you wouldn't have to deal with that throbbing loneliness and darn pain suffocating your every other emotion. And yet, you couldn't find it in yourself to say no, not to Baekhyun who counted on you so much. After all, you wanted him to feel like he could count on you always, you wanted him to reach out to you like he always did. You wanted him to continue doing that, and then maybe... at some point, he'd remember you were there too.

Pathetic, weren't you after all? So much for denying when it was so clear.

Everything was so clear.

That you wanted him all to yourself. Baekhyun, Baekhyun, Baekhyun. You longed to have his chocolate eyes swarming with warmth directed to you again, you wanted his radiant smile to melt your heart and cover your skin with goosebumps. You wanted his voice calling out to you for more than just a brief greeting. A long, never-ending conversation with just the two of you, on the sofa. That was what you longed for. To simply have back the time the two of you used to spend together. To be that constant in his life.

You fucking missed him, and that was okay, wasn't it? You were best friends after all. Didn't he miss you even a little bit? Now that he'd been distant for so long, didn't he think of his best friend the slightest bit? You felt your heart crack the slightest.

He was just your best friend, but why did it hurt so damn much? When the fuck did things start crumbling above of you?

If you took two paracetamol pills from 500mg, would it be the same as 1000mg? Would they ever be enough to ease the ache in your chest?

Your train of thoughts was interrupted when the screen of your phone suddenly lit up, almost startling you out of your current position on the couch. Currently, you were in the comfort of your home. The device vibrated with an incoming call and a sigh tumbled from your already parted lips.

Speaking of the devil, you thought as you hesitantly picked the phone up, for a moment you considered not answering the call. To let it ring until it would hit the hotline. Would that keep you in his thoughts?- A frown creased your brows as you realized what in the world you were thinking and before you could even evaluate your choice, you had already swiped the green button, answering the call.

It was just a call anyway. Just Baekhyun, it wasn't like something had changed after all.

You had to take a deep breath to steady your unusually nervous heartbeat. "Hello?" You spoke expectantly, finally realizing that it had been a while since he actually called you instead of sending brief texts. "Hey," His voice sounded darker over the phone, you couldn't help but remark, longing for more, the grip on your phone tightened- fingertips turning white.

"I- I know I've been asking you to come very often lately, I know you're probably resting right now and I'm sorry, but I truly need your help- I don't know what to do," Baekhyun sounded so extremely frustrated and distressed as he rambled on insecure words to which you could only frown to as you barely caught a thing he said.

"Baekhyun, calm down," You called soothingly, your voice a mere hushed tone as you knew that if you kept a calm manner, he would too. In fact, not even a second later, you heard the man draw a long breath, and almost, almost, you could see him and his chest deflate slowly as air would escape his pretty lips before you. "Now, tell me what's the matter."

"Sarang is throwing a fit! I-" Baekhyun did not know where to start, his hand gesticulating although you were not there to see him. Disbelief cascaded on his words the more he spoke, you could tell that he was absolutely desperate. "She's in her room and won't talk to me, I don't know what I have done wrong." He sighed defeatedly, "I really don't know." A moment of silence took place before his voice that had shrunken into a small, breakable whisper reached your ears again.

"Please...I really need you..." Your throat went absolutely dry at the plea in his hushed, husky voice and you swallowed whatever was left of moisture in your mouth, but to no avail, as everything was parched. Only a defeated sigh passed through your parted lips as you knew, that you were going to lose yourself in that sensation again. The one that empowered your resistance against him. You felt so lost as your lips parted and spoke on their own, you were drowning. Your lungs completely suffocating when surrounded by the longing for him that was enveloping you like violent waves in a rainstorm.  

"I'll be there." The reassuring words had rolled off your tongue without your consent, but a part of you told you that it had been the right thing to do when you heard the relieved hum coming from Baekhyun on the other side. The smile spoke volumes in his voice as he thanked you hundreds of times.

***

Your gaze traveled along the pink door leading to Sarang's room. On its surface hung countless colorful drawings, to which each and all of them sparkled with childish happiness, a youth that manifested in the odd yet fantasy-filled representation of her little self holding Baekhyun's hand. In some drawings, you would even find yourself being present as well, which would never cease to provide you a lovely warmth in your chest.

Teeth dug into your lip while you contemplated your next actions. Baekhyun was standing just a few meters away with a worried frown permanently creasing his soft features while his eyes were unwavering from your figure and you could feel his gaze burning on your back. For some reason, his presence felt ever so slightly unnerving,  you were sure that it was because it had been a while since the two of you finally seen each other ever since he started frequenting the girl.

Deciding to not waste any more time, you shot your shot and brought your fist to the door, knocking gently, calmly calling out to the child. "Sarang, It's me, unnie." You started after a few knocks, "Will you let me in?" Your question lingered in the air thickly for a few moments until it completely dissipated. Your lips pressed into a thin line, a bit discouraged. But nonetheless, you insisted. "Why are you sad, baby? Don't you wanna tell unnie?" Coo found its way in your voice, sweet and understanding, inducing the angry child from the other side of the wall to give in. Relief washed over you when the pink door slowly creaked open. Quickly, you sent a glance in Baekhyun's direction from over your shoulder, only to see him smiling softly at the sight of you entering his daughter's room. It was a knowing smile, like he had known exactly what had been needed when Sarang had refused him. A sweet warmth crawled in your chest, eventually spreading lovingly into every inch of your body and you found yourself smiling despite the situation.

The child had her back facing you and her small shoulders slumped downwards while her tiny fists tightened next to her sides, fingers gripping onto her puffy dress. You felt the previous warmth in your chest immediately get replaced by a cold, heartbreaking pain clenching at your heart. Oh, how you despised to see the ray of sunshine burn out like this. If something had managed to take that toothy smile from her features then it meant something, or, someone had truly hurt her feelings.

With your legs crossed on the floor, you reached out of her fist and gently untangled her fingers from the tight hold. "Sweetie," You cooed, "Who made you sad? Who should I scold, hm?" Your voice was only a mere whisper as Sarang let her herself be guided to your chest, eventually nuzzling into it once enveloped by your arms, and your heart was to be broken when she burst into subtle sniffles, indicating that she was shedding tears. "Oh honey," You soothed while running your hands through her slightly knotted tresses, her little body shook in your arms and you could only bring her closer to your chest. "What's wrong honey, please tell me or unnie will cry too." The words seemed to convince her because when you leaned away to cup her chubby cheeks with your warm palms, she let you. Her droopy puppy eyes were puffy and red with tears as she sadly blinked her long, wet lashes at you. Her flushed cheeks crystalized by the salty water.

"D-daddy," She started but struggled to speak as the hiccups bubbling in her throat were strong and overpowering, shaking her small body. "Daddy don't play with Sarang no more, he dun love Sarang no more." Upon speaking the last sentence Sarang broke into tears again, letting out ugly cries filled with heartbreak and sadness.

"Sweetheart! Why are you talking like that, you know daddy loves you. He always will." You assured but deep inside you couldn't help but wonder what this whole situation was all about, you knew that Sarang wouldn't even utter such words if it wasn't for a valid reason.

She shook her head furiously, her eyebrows bending into a sulky frown, her lips pouty and pointing downward. "Dad only talks with other unnie, he forgets about Sarang." The tears were still pooling in her eyes and slowly trailing down her kissable cheeks. It pained you to listen to what she was saying, although you knew that she was innocently exaggerating some details. It didn't take a genius to realize it, children had strong emotions and experienced things very animatedly.

"I don't want daddy to fall in love anymore." A great portion of your conscious was screaming that this was your fault after all. It was only because of you if Baekhyun had met new people, leading him to spend lesser time with his daughter. But even if you apologized to the child, she wouldn't completely understand the connections, so you settled with caressing her cheeks, with your thumb, and brushed away the tear stains.

"Sarang," A soft smile blossomed on your lips as you thought about how much Baekhyun adored Sarang. "Daddy loves you so much, more than anyone else.  But sometimes he too can get caught with other people. It's normal, do you understand that?" She nodded hesitantly. "Since daddy is forgetful, and a bit dumb too," You playfully whispered the last part, prompting her to let out a giggle although her glossy eyes. "He needs someone like Sarang to remind him whenever too much, is too much. Would you do that for him, Sarang?" This time, the little girl seemed far brighter as he bobbed her head up and down, soon a smile taking place on her lips. "Then go tell daddy why you are angry now, go scold him. Grr!" You growled playfully and formed your hands into claws, to which she imitated gleefully, repeating the sound of a little tigress.

When her happy gurgles had died down, Sarang crossed her arms on her chest in a fierce demeanor and pouted angrily. You raised an amused brow and had to press your lips together so that you wouldn't laugh. "Do I look scary?" She whispered secretly, curiosity and question marks sparkled within her orbs and you nodded enthusiastically, ushering her to step outside where Baekhyun had been waiting all this time, probably nerve-wracked.

The man's face brightened like the sun when Sarang stepped out of her room with you following close behind. Without wasting a single second, he crouched on the floor and opened his arms for her to step inside them, but was caught off guard when Sarang intimidatingly crossed her arms over her chest just like she had done with you two minutes ago. " I am angry at daddy!" She spouted right in his face, not bothering to put it into a nicer way. Baekhyun was shocked, almost scandalized for that matter and you had to drill your teeth into your lip to not burst into laughter.

"B-baby- what?" He stammered, clearly taken aback. His arms that had been inviting her into a hug slowly fell limp next to his sides.

"Daddy, you always go out and forget about Sarang." The child pointed out to the father whose eyes widened with realization, regret slowly but surely taking over every inch of his being.

"I feel like daddy don't care about me no more," The anguish burst through the tough behavior that she had tried to pull off in the begging, the playfulness by now long gone and both you and Baekhyun saw how her already swollen eyes had started to water again. Baekhyun felt like her heart had broken right in his hands and he felt so angry at himself, disappointed. So much for being a better father, only for it to hurt the most important person in his life.

"Oh sweetheart, I-" Even he choked on the lump in the throat, tears immediately reached his waterline to blurry out his view. You felt like you weren't supposed to stand right there and witness such a scene, but it wasn't like you could leave either.

"I am so sorry," He gasped and desperately reached out for Sarang who thankfully did not move away and instead let her father embrace her. His face was nuzzled into her little shoulder while his beautiful hand was in a constant caressing motion at the back of her head, whispering sorrowful apologies to her ears.

"I- I just wanted you to be happier, I wanted to find someone so that you could have a mommy again. But instead, I hurt you, and daddy is so sorry, will you forgive him?" Baekhyun explained to his girl while rocking their bodies slowly from side to side, his voice by now weak and threatening to break at any second. Sarang abruptly leaned away from his chest, wearing a disbelieved frown on her face.

"But Sarang don't need a mommy! Sarang has daddy and unnie, is enough!" She scolded her own dad for not knowing any better although she had made it clear to him that having a mother wasn't a necessity at this point, yet not truly understanding that Baekhyun needed someone to love him that way. She was indeed, still too young for that conversation. However, the male tried to put it in a simpler way.

Ever so gently, he tucked a few strands of her hair behind her ear, a tender, an extremely sweet smile blossomed on his lips, and even just seeing him making that face was enough for the butterflies to wildly flutter their wings against the walls of your tummy.  You wanted to look away but you simply couldn't, he was like the sun, and like its flower, you kept yourself gazing at him.

"Sarang, sweetheart." He initiated calmly, "I know that is how you feel, and dad is happy that you are content." His voice was soothing, a mere feather running along with your ears as he pronounced each and every word slowly so that he was sure that she could understand all of it. Not so subtly, he looked up at you and met your magnetic gaze before continuing. "However, even people like daddy and unnie need someone who loves them as a mother and father does to each other," Baekhyun concluded and guided his eyes towards his daughter again, who seemed to get a hold of the concept he was. Although not completely happy with the answer, she nodded understandingly, looking down at her feet and in the process cast a faint shadow of her lashes down her apple round cheeks.

"Thank you for understanding, Sarang. I love you, baby." Baekhyun sincerely said before trapping the little girl in his embrace again, extremely joyful about the fact that she had wrapped her short arms around his neck back. She had forgiven him.

"What do you think about a movie night? Every day for the next week?" He then suggested enthusiastically, approving the thought of canceling a couple of dates with the girl. After all, he had every right to spend time with his daughter. It was about time that he started setting his priorities straight again. Little Sarang let out an excited squeal that made Baekhyun flinch back and painfully hold his ear while he cringed at the bouncing girl in his arms. Relief settled onto your heart while watching the forgive each other, not stopping the soft smile from crawling on your lips.

With a satisfied sigh, you excused yourself. "Well then, I'll take my leave." You announced briefly and readied yourself to reach the front door. Baekhyun and Sarang stopped playing with each other and unintentionally whined at the same time, in the same way, making you crack up the slightest. Baekhyun scrambled to his feet and hurried to stand in front of you, a shy look crossing his delicate face, making you want to just- cup his cheeks so bad and just shower them with lov- No. Contain yourself.

"No, don't leave."

"Huh?

"Stay. After all, it is thanks to you that we solved this matter." Baekhyun proposed with a proud smile on his lip, one that you couldn't reciprocate. You shook your head in disagreement.

"No, Baekhyun. It's my fault that this happened." You said dejectedly, finding a sudden interest in your shoes, missing the disapproving frown that Baekhyun had upon hearing your words.

"Hey," He had beckoned lowly, ever so slightly warningly as his gentle fingers had to your surprise, clasped around your chin, tilting your face upwards so that you could meet his sincere orbs. They were pooling with such raw emotions that overwhelmed you, crashed upon you even though you couldn't figure out a single one of them. The warmth from his delicate fingertips seeped into your skin and yet, that sudden proximity still managed to send shooting starts down your spine.

"That is absolutely not true." Baekhyun murmured, "Please don't feel that way." You had no idea if it had been your eyes playing hallucinating, but at one point, his dark, droopy gaze had fallen from your eyes to the south of your face. The action was subtle, perhaps could've been seen as innocuous, but it set your heart on fire, it went crashing against your ribs- rebelling against your thoughts and begging to burst through your chest. He was too close and you found yourself completely unable to get a hold of your emotions. You had felt how the tongue had tied itself into a knot in your mouth, cold sweat prickling at your skin. Why he was having such a dramatic effect on your body, you couldn't tell and it frustrated you so much- to not function properly in his proximity. Since when had things become this way?

"Just stay and watch a few movies with us, it's been a while anyways. We... I miss having you around." The pleading in his voice was genuine and it didn't fail to squeeze your heart longingly, you felt so damn wanted at that moment that despite your hesitant self, you still found yourself nodding at his request. You had waited for the moment he'd ask you to spend time with him again, where it could just be you, him, and the little Sarang. Maybe, he hadn't completely forgotten about you completely after all.  A relieved and thankful smile bloomed on Baekhyun's pretty lips as you agreed, his hands immediately reached for yours like it was all they had ever longed for, taking you to the living room.

The title of the movie appeared proudly on the Tv screen as you and Sarang entered the living room. Baekhyun had dragged you there right away, but you had insisted to get Sarang in her pajama before doing anything else. The man was already sprawled on the couch in his light blue pajama, its slight oversize made his portions shrink in the silky fabric, nonetheless looked immaculate. With his brown hair looking absolutely soft and caressive and a soft hue spreading on his shiny cheeks, a color that made your eager fingers twitch in the urge to reach out and touch them. His skin that always looked so flawless no matter from where you gazed,  you wondered if it was as soft as it seemed, or if it also was surrounded by a gentle scent of lotion-like his pretty hands often were. You knew because your skin was now bearing a certain fragrance that he had transmitted to you when holding your hand in his. For some reason, you couldn't stop concentrating on the flowery scent now emanating from your hands.

If you'd smell it from close- you'd probably get drunk on it. On him.

Had you just admitted that?

Sarang was radiating excitement as she ran to the couch, jumping on it like the bunny she was and snuggled immediately next to Baekhyun who wordlessly brought her closer, placing an affectionate kiss on her crown. Teeth were drilled in your lip as you took a seat, for your own sanity keeping a distance that usually wouldn't be there. Sitting by the end of the couch, you earned two confused looks from both Baekhyun and Sarang.

Baekhyun looked you up and down with an incredulous look, almost mockingly as he chuckled out loud. "What are you doing," He deadpanned, leaning across the couch to grip your arm. "You're acting weird today," Baekhyun pointed out, " just come here." He chimed as he with a gentle force dragged you next to him, throwing an arm around your shoulders so that you wouldn't escape. "There we go," He hummed contently, tightening his hold around you and Sarang who was in your same position but on the opposite side. For a moment you went completely frozen in your spot, the parts of your body that brushed his was all you could concentrate on. How scorching hot his skin was on yours, scalding you. As if you were the fuel, it took Baekhyun only a single touch for you to turn into a fire. It was as if the air in your lungs had been sucked out within a mere second, leaving you to gasp for oxygen. He- Baekhyun was so close, too close. He really shouldn't be so forward with you, putting his hand on your hip and gripping it casually, you wished you could tell him to take it easy on you, that you couldn't handle it if he did that kind of things. Your heart was weak, so extremely weak and already beating at such a speed, you feared it'd combust. You feared that he would feel it drumming and vibrating like a bass through your shaking body. And yet, you couldn't bring yourself to move away.

You couldn't bring yourself to even articulate a single word, there was a whole dance school going on in your belly.

You were melting in his embrace, and you wanted to.

"My princesses," Baekhyun cooed, his voice sounded as if it was dripping with honey and affection when he pressed another kiss to Sarang's head, and to your utter, beautiful disbelief, on yours too. Baekhyun's lips that you had never expected to ever have anywhere near your skin were now tenderly pressing a fond kiss to your temple. When he leaned slightly away, his candy scented breath melted into your skin before he closed the gap once again and pecked you once more, making you straight out tremble. Baekhyun's nape was right next to your nose as you had allowed yourself  (despite your nervous body) to cuddle into him like he had wanted you to, and you had to fight the urge to lean in and run your nose down his neck and breathe in the dazing scent coming from his fresh skin. There wasn't a single second where your whole being hadn't craved to drift even closer to him that night.

After a while, Sarang finally fell into a deep slumber in the arms of her father. It had been predictable that she wasn't going to last much longer, all that crying had for sure drained her energies. Baekhyun got up to put her to sleep, but soon returned and sat back on his spot. Not forgetting to make sure he could have his body in contact with yours, and so the two of you continued to watch movies until the late night.

***

As slumber was slowly leaving your body, all you could subconsciously remark was that you hadn't slept this well in a long time. A few parts of your body were aching due to the awkward position that you weren't completely aware of yet. A content, lazy smile was on your lips when your body became conscious of the comforting warmth provided, it was combining with your own and crawling soothingly to reassure every inch of your body. But the more you slipped into awakeness, although your eyes were still closed shut with sleep, you realized that it wasn't really a blanket keeping you warm as you had believed just a few moments ago. Frowning groggily, you slowly allowed your eyes to flutter open, meeting one of the most breathtaking scenes you had ever taken part of. For a moment all you could think was that there was an angel lying next to you, an angel was holding you in his arms and he looked beautiful as if he had stepped out of a painting and blessed you with his presence.

In the span of a few seconds, your heartbeat had sped up, only to sooner calm down, its excitement morphing into a warmth that allowed flowers to bloom in your tummy. Their petals were tickling you and their roots were carving the beautiful letters of his name into your heart. His wavy hair was messily scattered over his forehead, on his crown it stuck into every direction but nonetheless- beautiful. A beautiful mess. Baekhyun's lips were slightly parted as soft sneers tumbled out of them. The eyelashes were glittering in the golden rays of the sun peeking through the blinders, like small diamonds adorning a ring. Their length reached the flushed apples of his cheeks, kissing them and casting a sweet shadow. You smiled fondly at the innocent view, at the warm blush that traveled from his left cheek, up the bridge of his nose and onto the right cheek, a soft hue that made him look so gorgeously young. His face completely free of any frown, indicating that he was having a peaceful sleep. Like he wasn't carrying so many struggles on his own, he looked like a carefree kid having his afternoon nap.

You felt yourself melting before him, Baekhyun's limbs were hugging your hips close to himself and his hands lazily claimed your waist while his fingertips teased the exposed skin of your back. The organ in your chest swelled, filling itself with so much affection and raw emotions, it swelled and swelled until you felt it pounding against your ribs. As if it was begging to break free and intertwine itself with Baekhyun's. Your eyes traced his tender features as he slept, so peaceful and mild, you wished the world could stop in this instant so that you could forever share this warmth with him. So that you could forever be embraced by his strong arms, protected, loved. So that you could forever bask in his scent that was sweet and soapy, mixed with the freshness of wood.

Another smile found its way on your lips as you pondered.

Indeed, loving Baekhyun was as easy as hating the cops.

Indeed-

Loving...

Loving Baekhyun.

The realization hit you like an ice-cold waterfall cutting through your body, air hitching inside of your throat as your eyes widened like saucers. Suddenly the flowers blooming in your chest felt like thorns scratching and cutting your insides. No, oh fuck no.

You should've known that the butterflies had been a red flag all along. With your chest heaving for oxygen, you re scrambled from your laying position, making Baekhyun stir awake at the sudden violent movements.

You liked him... No, you fucking loved him. You loved Baekhyun so much and it was so fucked up that you were helping him get together with someone else instead of making your feelings clear for him.

You had no idea why you felt so unnerved all of a sudden, but your thoughts were swirling all over your the place into a jumbled mess, making you breathless and utterly confused, all you knew was that you needed to leave the house and just getaway. Get away from him.

The heart jumped all the way to your throat when his voice suddenly ringed through the walls. Husky and tired, it called your name questioningly, making you freeze in your steps as you saw him entering the hallway you were standing in.

"What's going on?" He yawned, "Where are you going?"He pouted, which you really couldn't handle at the moment. Even in your panicked state, your brain found a way to remark how unfairly adorable Baekhyun was at the moment, rubbing the sleep out of his eye, the paw of his hand peeking from the oversized sleeve while standing there like a confused puppy. In his question lingered an unspoken request for you to stay longer, but at the moment all you really needed was some alone time to accept this new realization.

"I..." You had no idea what to say for yourself and you hoped he wouldn't dig too deep. "I have to go to work! Oh my God, I am actually very late- shit!" The words that left your trembling lips were completely random and made no sense as you started wearing your shoes and picked up your bag. Movements were extremely messy and rushed. Stupid! You cursed yourself, it was a freaking Sunday and there was no way Baekhyun was going to believe that. Despite the confused (and adorable) frown causing a tiny crease on his forehead, he didn't question it. It seemed like your hasty behavior had been enough to fool his groggy self.

"Will you come by next week?" Baekhyun then asked before you could curl your hand against the handle. Suddenly it felt like the lump in your throat had grown inches- and kept on expanding as another realization dawned on you.

He had told you just last night how he would be having another date next week since he had postponed the one from yesterday to focus more on his daughter. And you had, with a smile, agreed.

You would be going to his house, only for him to exit it, to meet another woman, and this fact that hadn't given you more than a little twinge in your chest yesterday was now devastating you.

Baekhyun was already entering another relationship- and although you had known that, until today, it had never meant anything to you. But now all of a sudden, you did bother because you knew that you so much wanted to be that girl he would be smiling at- and perhaps even kissing every day. Gosh, you wanted him all for yourself but wishing was so fucking useless at the moment. You had already thrown away your chance and Baekhyun already belonged to someone. And that someone was not you.

Nothing had been established and yet it still felt like your heart was breaking. Even so, why was it so damn painful? Why did it need to feel like someone was ripping it to shreds, clenching it with no mercy? Perhaps, because as beautiful as love could seem, be and feel, it was bound to hurt you just as much when gone wrong.

Be aware of butterflies, they had said, because they'll break your heart.

To pieces.

It had always sounded ridiculous to you, but there you were experiencing the exact thing. Your heart was crumbling, falling in the pit of your stomach as your teeth drew blood from your lips to stop them from trembling. All you could offer the man was a nod before escaping behind the door because the last thing you could trust at that point was your voice.

Although now outside, the fresh air did not help your suffocating lungs as you gasped out the sob that you had been holding in for the entire time in there. Tears blurred your view but you furiously dried them with your sleeve as you hurried over to your car. The fabric of your jacket rubbing against your eyes hurt more than what you had thought and you found yourself cursing under your breath, cursing everything you had done and everything that came into your view. It did not make you feel better at all. What were you supposed to do when everything you had was crumbling upon you?

A weight had laid itself upon your chest from the very moment you had opened that door of his, and you knew, that it was going to be with you for a while.

***

The week was rushing by and although you had done nothing but immerse yourself in your job to forget and concentrate on other things that weren't the pain in your chest and the desperate longing for his presence, you still felt as if nothing had changed. It still felt like that Sunday where you had left Baekhyun's property with tears in your eyes had yet to come to an end. Indeed, the week passed by and you followed your routine, but no matter where your body would go during the days, your mind wouldn't budge from that one morning where for a few moments, everything had been so perfect and ever so ethereal, only for it to be like a window busted by a rock.

You were frustrated with yourself because you couldn't wrap your head around it and let it go. It was all you wanted at the moment, to just accept things as they were and end this pain. But your heart was stubborn like you had never asked it to be. So loyal to that boxy and toothy smile of his. Friday was nearing and your heart could just race anxiously at the reminder of babysitting Sarang. You were nowhere ready to face him again, the part of you who was a coward secretly hoped that Baekhyun would be out by the time you'd arrive so that you could indulge solely in Sarang's warm smile. It'd be just helpful if you could forget his at some point, that would hurt a lot less, wouldn't it?

What hurt even more, was how you knew, that he was clueless about all of this pain he was causing you, and you couldn't put a single blame on him.

It had been you, after all.

***

Friday, a little over 6 pm. Perhaps you had come a bit late on purpose, but you wouldn't admit that to yourself as you stood in right before his front door and swung nervously on the balls of your feet. Conflicted between knocking or just entering casually as you normally would. If you knocked, it wasn't like the little Sarang would be tall enough to open the door, but what if Baekhyun would supposedly still be at home for whatever reason when you went in? That would feel even more awkward and-

Your hand twitched and before you knew it, you had already swung the door open, as if your body was fed up with your overthinking and took matters into its own hands. Quite literally. Well, no turning back now, you encouraged yourself and walked in while muttering a small I'm here. It was odd to not have a bubbly Sarang running with all her might to latch her arms around your legs and give you the happiest greeting. Instead, you were met with deafening silence, though you knew that you weren't alone in the house as it had been unlocked. The more you walked your way inside, the clearer the noise of glasses clinking against each other became. Rounding the corner, you were met with the last thing you had expected to see. A defeated Baekhyun arranging liquors and alcoholic drinks on the table, a few shot glasses stood unused by the bottles and you supposed that he hadn't even gotten started yet. You completely forgot about the worries that had been eating you up just a few seconds ago and walked over to him, grabbing his wrist before he could pour himself the string liquid you knew he couldn't handle.

"What are you doing?" You regretted how accusing your question had come out, but soon your cleared your throat and spoke again, "Why are you here at home, what about Sarang?" This time you spoke softly and allowed your gaze to lock with his confused one that within a matter of seconds filled with realization. A groan left his lips as he buried his face into his palms.

"Sorry, I forgot to tell you, I dropped her at my mother's,  you actually didn't need to come." Baekhyun seemed incredibly apologetic and regretful as he explained himself, but you couldn't bring yourself to concentrate on those emotions when his droopy orbs were swirling with something far more sorrowful. His eyes were dark, and deep like oceans and anyone else wouldn't have been able to read him at this moment. But you had dived into those eyes of his so many times before, you knew better than to believe that those lines of lack of sleep tracing his features were merely because of his exhausting job. Worry crawled into you and you took a seat in front of him, hesitantly brushing your fingertips against his only to feel the urge to flinch because they weren't as warm as they'd usually be when holding onto you.

"Baekhyun, what's wrong?" The question on its own managed to crack the facade he often wore to not worry anyone around him and to make himself believe he was fine when in reality he was anything but that. His eyebrows bent in sorrow and his eyes turned ever so slightly glossy, making a lump grow in your throat.

"I messed up," He confessed under his breath, his whisper breaking in the middle of his sentence. Baekhyun's hands were frustrated as they gripped at his hair, pulling slightly as he puffed out a desperate breath. "It's over. " A small tear escaped his eye and he growled frustratedly, drying it harshly.  "As soon as she knew about Sarang she cut the ties. What am I going to do at this point?!" He was on the verge of shouting, "I am not good enough for anyone, I'm so fucking done." You could see his adam's apple bobbing, reasonably attempting to swallow down the sob threatening to spill from his lips because he didn't need another person to witness him being weak for the millionth time.  

No, please, don't ever say that. You wanted to tell him so bad, but you were such a coward, it was like your lips were sealed. When another tear traveled down his cheek, you finally found it in yourself to scramble out of your seat and sit next to him instead, taking his face into your trembling hands and shaking your head with disagreement.

"That is so not true, Baekhyun." You murmured brokenly. The fact that he would even for a second believe such a lie made you want to burst into tears. He was so beautiful, he was anything that someone could want in a person and more. It was so unfair that he didn't know. Baekhyun's expression was indecipherable even to you as he stared into your eyes with such seriousness, eventually tracing your features and you could feel his eyes dance all over your face.

Baekhyun cleared his throat after what seemed to have been five whole minutes, but really, had been a lot less. His hands gently pried yours from his cheeks and placed them back in your lap, eyeing the things he had set on the table before you had come. With a sigh, he uttered:

"Shall we have a couple of drinks?" The question was so out of the blue and yet managed to crack you up, and he smiled slightly too when he saw you doing it. You nodded.

Why not? He wasn't the only emotional one, and you had no idea what would be the outcome if the two of you got drunk together, but at the moment you couldn't care less. It finally felt as if that weight was slowly lifting itself from your chest, so all you could do was continue on this road you had ended upon.

***

Laughter and giggling were filling the once quiet walls of his home, Baekhhyun had just sputtered one of his stupid jokes that really, shouldn't have been as funny as it had seemed now that you were influenced by alcohol. Yet, you found yourself laughing intensely enough to have tears spring in your eyes. The man wore a proud grin on his face upon having you laugh so freely because of something he said. You weren't completely drunk just yet- but tipsy enough to have that warm hue crawl along your face, giving both of you a shy look, but that shy look secretly hid a sudden braveness that only came with the strong drink. One that made you feel the bravest you've ever been, at the same time as an enhanced version of yourself, possibly, a little out of yourself too. But it didn't matter anymore.

Your loud voices eventually died down and Baekhyun leaned his head onto the table when hit by a sudden wave of sleepiness and dizziness. His cheek squashed against its surface and in the process hid his eye as he faced you in his position. He looked at you and you gazed back, leaning onto your palm to take in his every detail, only to feel a sudden sense of unfairness surge within you, anger sparked in your chest as you picked up your beer bottled and swung it in the air while gesticulating.

"I don't understand!" Your loud voice made the sleepy male flinch back awake, he eyed you with big eyes and question marks popping above of his head. "You!" You pointed an accusatory finger in his direction and the confused male winced once again, not knowing what to expect from you, whether he'll feel offended or confused by the possible nonsense about to leave your mouth. But that wasn't really it.

"You're so beautiful." The statement was nothing like what he had expected you to say and the shock was evident on his flushed face. The more you looked at his pink cheeks, the more you wanted to squish his them together and press your lips to his plump ones that currently looked like your favorite lollipop flavor. "And I do not understand how three women in a row rejected all this good that you are! Like can't they see?!" You slurred and pointed at him once more. "

"Byun Baekhyun, if I was them, I would've already been your girlfriend, loving both you and Sarang. They are dumb. They are dumb, you hear me?!" Your voice was slightly high-pitched as you spoke, the words you were uttering were making your heart beat faster because you knew that you were basically confessing, but the sudden braveness was clouding your senses. All you could think about was that you wanted him to know.

"You are perfect- Byun Baekhyun," Your head dropped gently on the table right in front of his and the table felt cool on your cheek which made you feel more awake. Not enough to back away though. "Repeat after me," You ordered, without realizing the meaningful look that Baekhyun was manifesting in his starry eyes while following your every movement.

"I am perfect-" You felt yourself freeze when suddenly consciousness was knocked into you with the simple caress of Baekhyun's strawberry breath on your cheeks. Without a warning, he had scooted closer to you, his hand reached out for your own and thunders seemed to spark from his fingertips as they met yours, gently tracing your palm and intertwining your fingers with his beautiful ones. From a little more than tipsy to completely sober in the span of a few seconds, it was absolutely odd but even so, you couldn't find it in yourself to willingly move away. Because you didn't want to.

Butterflies fluttered in your belly- and the sensation brought you to fear, however,  Baekhyun's familiar scent fell on you like the warmest, most comforting blanket, and you soon forgot about anything that wasn't him. His face from this close was like the most precious treasure, you loved how you could count his lashes from this nearness, being able to see the texture of his skin or stare at your own reflection in his sparkling, adoring mirrors.

As much as those features of his were mesmerizing, nothing could even remotely come close to those pink lips of his that glistened under the dim kitchen lights has he darted a slow, and careful tongue across them, and the action made a foreign heat gather in your core. Unconsciously, your legs pressed together. You wanted them on yours so bad. His breath on your mouth was teasing and making you impatient. Teeth dug into your lip as you held back the urge to close the distance, Baekhyun was just taking his time studying yours as if he had to find the perfect way to kiss them with, eyes hooded with desire. A wave of disappointment washed over you when you felt his hand untangle from yours, but it didn't last long as he soon enough had already cupped your cheek with it. He wasted no time in bringing his thumb to your caged lips and released them from the hold of your teeth, letting them fall apart and vulnerable. They were pulsing eagerly, longing for his to devour them.

His thumb still held the fine edge of your lower lip as he inched closer, expanding it and feeling its soft texture with his pad. You watched his eyelids fall over his orbs as he gently licked the part of your lips that he was pulling and the gasp you let out at the sensation melted on his caressing tongue. His wet pillows stuck to yours like sticky glue as he finally pressed them against yours. A trembling sigh left your lips when you finally got what you wanted. He shifted from the table without parting your lips, keeping you engaged in the hungry kiss. You hadn't even noticed how he had dragged you up to your feet only so that he could press you against the nearest wall and press his scorching body against yours. Baekhyun's teeth dug softly into your lip before soothing it with a suck, later dragging his lips down your jaw, your neck, and painted your skin with his tickling kisses. The heat in your core could only grow as his hands traced every inch of your body, thumbs pushing the fabric of your shirt so that they could draw circles on your hips.

He panted against your collarbone at the pleasant feeling of your lips on his ear and your heart swelled when his arms hugged your waist instead of touching it sensually as he had done a few seconds ago. Without a warning, he kissed you square on the lips once again, but you complied joyfully. "Jump, please," He muffled against your swelling lips, and you did, lacing your legs around his torso. His hand traced the lower part of your thighs, coming to rest on your bum. Although your clothes were separating you, his touch still felt like it burned on your skin. It made you feel alive as it traveled underneath your shirt, spreading on your back. Taking its time to feel every pattern of your flesh, bones. Like you were the most beautiful canvas and his fingers' the brushed itching to paint it.

Everything that was happened felt slow, but at the same time like a blur. Your head was spinning around as you suddenly found yourself in his bedroom, shakily unbuttoning his shirt. Your fingers were trembling uncontrollably, barely pushing the buttons out of the hole. Warmth crept on your cheeks because you were taking so long, but you couldn't help the excitement buzzing so violently through your body. You thought Baekhyun had gotten enough of your incapability when he suddenly grabbed your hands, stopping you from continuing. But Baekhyun had always been full of surprises. Your heart squirmed affectionately when he brought your hands to his face. "It's okay," He had murmured ever so gently as he pressed feathery kisses on your fingertips, lips enveloping your digits.

"I- I'm sorry," You stuttered, completely out of yourself as you resumed unbuttoning, this time successful, "It just feels like I'm unwrapping a gift I've been waiting for my whole life." You admitted quietly, hesitantly placing your hands on his sturdy shoulders, slowly pushing down his shirt, stripping him of it. His body was warm and tense underneath your touch, muscles hard and strong.

A sweet chuckle resonated through the walls and you wished you could've replayed it a thousand times again. The sun had set hours ago, leaving the bright full moon to paint his features in its silver, glittering linings. He looked even more mesmerizing than this morning, he just never stopped growing beautiful.

Baekhyun found it impossible not to kiss your flushed cheeks at your nervous antics. Pressing his forehead against yours, he let your hands go, just so that he could trace his finger along your protruding collarbone, eventually hooking around your spaghetti strap. "Can I?" He asked carefully, and you thought he never would've. You nodded and he wasted no time, face nuzzling into the crook of your neck, he lifted the hem of your shirt. A kiss was pressed to your shoulders before he leaned away so that you could lift your arms, helping him.

"My beautiful," He breathed out at the view of your naked torso, eyes brimming with adoration and affection like you truly were the most wonderful person he had ever seen, "Beautiful darling."

You had no idea how a moment could be such a blur but at the same time feel like the while you've been more alive than ever. From when his hands had explored your naked body, bosom swelling in his tender palms, giving him the chance to feel your beating heart pulsating against his fingers. His lips whispering the sweetest nothing's into your ear as he made sure you knew that you were beautiful. The moment you had been able to do just the same with him, giving him sensations to remember and treasure. Sensations that only you and he could ignite from each other.  Becoming one important thing together, one wonderful thing.

One.

***

It was late in the morning, but you felt like you could sleep for another ten hours. You felt completely exhausted as you stirred awake, stretching your limbs ever so slightly, only to wince at the sore sensation taking place in the lower parts of your body. Of course, you remembered. Although you had been under the influence of alcohol, there would've never been a chance that you would forget such a moment. Hence, you were happy, so happy that you felt tingles crawling through your body, shooting stars flying down your spine. Your whole being was like a starry night as you woke up to Baekhyun eyeing you with those droopy eyelids hooding lazily over his orbs. His arm was hugging your bare waist and he was staying in the position that he had woken up in, that alone should've been to answer your every question, but still, you felt the need to hear it from him. Though, before you could even open your mouth, Baekhyun had already beat you to it.

"I have to apologize."

What? Your heart fell to the pit of your stomach and you felt how the anxiety was crawling at every edge it could grip.

"I, I apologize for making love to you when I wasn't sober- I"

Making love.

Not sex. Love.

"Baekhyun. I love you." It was like his voice had been sucked back into his throat as you interrupted him with the words.  "Do you regret what we did?" You continued, and Baekhyun looked taken aback, to say the least, but he recovered quickly and shook his head with a soft smile blossoming on his lips.

"As I was saying, " He chuckled, "It's hard for me to wrap my head around the way everything happened. But I don't regret a single thing I said, neither anything I did." What he was saying settled a blissful relief in your chest and your eyes couldn't find something to settle on his beautiful face. Whether to gaze into his endless oceans or watch his swollen lips speak, or maybe the tiny moles scattered all over his face.

"I've been feeling it for a while. That I was just fooling myself, and those women I went out with. Because as amazing as they were, I realized that there isn't anyone else I'd like to spend my days apart from you." Honey dripped from his lips, indeed his words were too sweet, but they were directed towards you, and that solely felt like you were stepping onto could nine.

"Nobody knows me like you do," He murmured as he pressed a palm to your flushed cheek, the pad of his thumb drawing lazy circles on it. "Nobody loves Sarang like you do,"

"How could there ever be someone else when you're here, loving everything I am including my flaws, probably knowing me better than I do myself." He chuckled with disbelief as if he couldn't believe that he had actually tried to chase other women when the only one for him had been next to him all along.

"And as I've realized that I...That I love you, I won't apologize that our first time wasn't when I was completely aware and sober." Baekhyun pleaded for forgiveness, shifting so that he could hover over you, the blanket slipped down his naked body, exposing him slightly. But the truth was that you weren't angry at all.

"And I hope you'll let me do it again, but this time I'll do it right." He dipped his head down to murmur against your lips.

"Will you let me?" His hand had caressed along the lines of your body, fingers gently prying the cover from your bodies. In his eyes shone so much love, so much desire to show it all to you, how much you meant to him.

"You don't have to ask," You replied sweetly, already welcoming the petals dancing in your tummy, loving the traces of warmth his hands left on you, how he took his time to explore every inch of you so that he could know you like no one else did. So that he could love you like no one else did.

"Daddy!!!" Sarang's high pitched giggle cut through the thick tension that had built up between the two of you, prompting Baekhyun to look down at you with a terrified expression taking over his face.

"Daddy I'm home! Let's play!"

"You should go," You teased while laughing at him, to which he gave you a playful glare, a bit disappointed to postpone things.

"Daadddyyyy! Are you hiding?" Sarang insisted from wherever she was wandering, and you couldn't help but think to yourself, that you were ready. Ready to indulge into this relationship, ready to take Sarang in your arms as if she was your family. You were ready to face it all.

A sudden affectionate swelling took place in your heart and you couldn't stop yourself when you grabbed Baekhyun's cheeks in your hands and pulled him down for a gentle, lingering kiss.

"You should go before she sees us like this." You ushered him to hurry and he nodded in agreement, stealing another set of eager kisses. "Will do, my love" He whispered in your ear teasingly before rolling over the other side and getting ready to greet his impatient daughter.

It felt like it was only you and me in the world.

I fell in love with your smile. After that, I just love everything about you.

I think of you every day,

Stupid in love.

Fin.

***

A/N

Phew! That was one long ride! I think this is the longest one shot I have ever written and it's currently almost 2am and all I want to do is post this quickly aaah >< I deeply apologize for all the mistakes you might find in here! I will do editing after posting.

I truly thank you all for sticking with me through this whole one shot! I am so thankful that you gave this your precious time and I hope it was worth the wait! I really invite you to express yourselves and tell me what you think of it. Comments and feedback are so motivating to me and I'd deeply appreciate it if you did.  As always, I send you all of my love and hugs, I love you all and please stay safe and clean your pretty hands! You are all precious, little flowers 💕🥰💖💌

P.S.

The ending was so damn hard to write and my brain Is fizzling right now haha, I hope it isn't as bad as it seems to me right now.  I might change it bit as well, just because I don't feel completely happy with it, but I really wanted to post this also.

Alright! That was all from me! Be kind to yourselves and spread love! Much love, P.💖💕

Tag list:

@bbyunz​ @soos-goddess​ @byunfirstlady​ @baekklove​ @christiandosworld​ @sunbyun21​ @milky-baek​ @changshapatrol​ @lalalala-lav​ 

[five-rivers]

Darkness/Poison

This is part of the ‘Doorways’ series (aka Danny is an eldritch abomination and Jack and Maddie have no normal friends so they decide to go on a road trip to make sure none of their friends from college have become semi-satanic soul-eating holes in reality AU).  

AO3 link to series.

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The Fenton Ghost Assault Vehicle did not have the smoothest ride in the world, but Danny was used to it.  Also, he had driven the Specter Speeder through the Carnivorous Canyon and ridden in Johnny 13’s sidecar.

Point being, if his parents didn’t want him to fall asleep, they should have told him.  Or, at least, not dragged him out of bed at four thirty in the morning (both to get an early start and to avoid the reporters and other undesirables who had taken to circling Fentonworks like vultures).

Look.  Danny might have been an unspeakable eldritch horror, a superhero, and one of the richest human beings on the face of the Earth, but he was also a teenager.  Not to mention sleep deprived.  

Besides, Mom and Dad had said their next Paranormal Research Club friend was miles and miles away.  They wouldn’t reach his town until much later in the day.  Danny had plenty of time to sleep safely.  

Which is why he was so disgruntled when Dad shook him awake with a cheery “We’re here!”

“Where’s here?” asked Danny, rubbing his eyes and noting sadly how far away his portal back in Amity Park was.  

“Breakfast,” said Jazz, voice heavy with sleep.  Apparently, he wasn’t the only one trying to take advantage.  

“’Kay,” said Danny, briefly wrestling with the seatbelt.  He caught Mom staring as he opened the door.  “What?” he asked frowning.  

“Nothing,” she said, unconvincingly.

Whatever.  Danny could figure it out later, when he was more awake.  He jumped to the ground.  

“I think you guys will really like it here!” said Dad, waving at the building.  “The food’s great!  An old friend owns the place.  Your mom and I used to come here all the time before you were born, when we were commuting between Amity and Chicago.”

Danny nodded along, staring up at the neon sign that read ‘Red Flower Dinner.’  Then his brain caught up, and he slowly turned his head to look at Dad.  

“’Old friend,’” he said.  “What do you mean old friend?”

Dad blinked at him, uncomprehending.  Jazz came to his rescue.  

“Dad, we’re doing this whole trip because all of your old friends are lunatics,” she explained.  

“They’re not!” said Dad, defensively.  “Besides, Marianne was never part of our club.  She didn’t even go to U of M.”

“She was a waitress at our favorite hangout,” explained Mom.  “She got enough saved to buy this restaurant around the time we graduated.  She’s few years older than us.”

“Saved?  I thought a relative died, and she got an inheritance?” asked Dad.

Danny groaned.  “Do you not see how suspicious that is?”

“Come on, Danno!  We can have normal friends.”

“No, you can’t.  If a normal thing ever interacts with our family in any way, it immediately becomes abnormal simply because of how unlikely it is for anything like that to happen.”  He dug the heels of his hands into his eyes until he saw stars.  

“He’s got a point,” said Jazz.  “Maybe we could go to a different dinner?”

“But,” said Dad, “she makes the best breakfast. And she really is normal.  She wasn’t involved in any ghost stuff.”

“Are you really telling me you never talked to her about ghost stuff at all?” asked Danny, suspiciously.  

“Well, we did,” said Dad.  “But we talk to everyone about ghost stuff.”  

“Dad…”

Dad inhaled and heaved a huge sigh, shoulders sagging.  “Alright, Danno.  I get what you’re saying.  We can go somewhere else…  Even if it won’t be as good.”

Okay.  Now Danny felt bad.  

Unfair.  

“Well,” he said.  “I guess we could check and make sure she’s not, you know, haunted or anything.  That’s why we’re doing this, I guess.”

Dad brightened immediately, and Danny had to grab the back of his shirt to keep him from running in.  

“But remember, if I say we have to go, we have to go.  That’s the deal.”

Dad nodded.  Danny let go.   He sighed as Dad disappeared into the building.  

“Is the food really that good?” asked Danny.

“Marianne grows a lot of her own herbs,” offered Mom with a shrug.  “Everything she makes is at least decent.  But, well,” she grimaced as she held the door open for her children. “The reason we liked her so much was that she always seemed interested in our research.  We liked talking to someone who took us seriously.”

“Wonderful,” deadpanned Jazz.

The décor inside the dinner was bright red and floral.  The seats and benches were upholstered in shiny, dyed leather.  A long glass counter displayed pies and other desserts under bright lights.  The air was warm and smelled faintly of cherries.  A radio station played quietly in the background, blurring the chatter of the other guests.  

Danny rubbed his eyes again.  Ugh.  He was tired. Sleeping in a moving vehicle was a special kind of unrestful.  Heh. Unrestful dead.  More like unrested dead.  That was him.  

(Someday, he was going to track down the first person to say, ‘I’ll sleep when I’m dead,’ and give them a stern talking to.)

“Marianne!” boomed Dad, waving at someone in the kitchen behind the order window.

There was a gasp.  “Jack Fenton!  Is that you?” A woman with greying brown curls leaned out, then ducked away briefly before reappearing through a door.  “I haven’t seen you in years!”  She threw her arms out, hugging first Dad and then Mom.

Danny bristled at the perceived threat to his parents but managed to control himself.  This was nothing.  Everything was fine.  Just because every one of his parents’ friends so far had something weird and potentially fatal going on so far, it didn’t give him the right to police their every interaction with other human beings.  

“Are these your kids?” asked Marianne, excitedly. “Oh, my goodness, you must be Jazz, and you’re Danny?  I’ve only seen you in pictures, but you’ve grown so much.  You’ll be as tall as your dad in no time.”

“Hope so,” said Danny, knowing there was no chance of that happening whatsoever.

Not with his human body, anyway.  

“I hope we’ll get a chance to talk,” she continued, “but I have things on the stove.  Why don’t you go ahead and find a seat?  We’ll get to you soon.”

“Looking forward to it, Marianne!” said Dad, waving again.  

“Is she alright?” asked Mom quietly as they slid into a corner booth.  

Danny wound up in between Mom and Jazz, which was good, because Dad tended to elbow whoever he was sitting by.  In this case, Mom, who could take it.

“I think so?” He rubbed his eyes.  “But I can’t just sense everything. Don’t forget that.”

“Stop rubbing your eyes,” said Mom.  

“They’re itchy,” said Danny.  “I think I got some sleep sand in them or something.”

Mom’s expression softened.  Danny blinked at it and wondered when he’d gotten so used to seeing an edge of suspicion on her face.  

“It could be allergies,” she said.  “It’s that time of year.  Or it could be that you keep rubbing them.”  She tugged his hands away from his face.  “Either way, it isn’t healthy to keep touching your eyes, sweetie.”

It wasn’t that she didn’t have a point, but Danny wasn’t entirely sure he could get sick.  Not anymore.  Maybe if he was far enough away from Amity Park, spread thin enough between his two major physical manifestations…  If his body was human enough…  Maybe figuring that out could be a fun family bonding experience.  Not.  

He yawned.  He wanted to go back to sleep.  Being in here, with the warm scented air and not-quite-white background noise, only made slumber more inviting.  

Still.  His family’s ability to protect themselves was lacking.  Danny at least had to stay conscious in case Marianne decided to channel the spirit of Locusta or something.  Ancients, wouldn’t that be typical?  

A waiter came, introduced themself, and handed out menus.  Danny failed to process most of the waiter’s prepared speech, and his eyes drifted down to the menu.  

It seemed… normal, for lack of a better word. Slightly worn, a couple stains on the paper behind the plastic protector.  The pages had a border of blotchy red flowers.  The items were all typical breakfast foods.  Nothing jumped out at him.  

He wasn’t even hungry.  Actually, if he thought about it, he was a little nauseated. Sometimes that happened when he didn’t eat for a while, though, so maybe he was hungry, after all?

Why did bodies have to be so complicated?

“What are you getting?” asked Jazz, who was morally unable to make a food order until she’d taken a poll.  

“I don’t know,” said Danny, folding his arms on the table and letting his head rest on them.  “I’ll probably just get whatever you’re getting.”

Jazz frowned at him and repeated the question to their parents.

The waiter came back after a few minutes.  

“I’ll have the Variety Breakfast!” said Dad, excitedly.  

“The number five, please,” said Maddie. “Sausage links, not bacon.”

“Um,” said Jazz.  “How about the Red Flower Special?”

“Excellent choice,” said the waiter, smiling. “Marianne grows all the seasonings for that herself, and the presentation is lovely.”

“I mean, it’s pancakes, right?” asked Jazz, nervously.  

“It is, it is.  What would you like for your side?”  It took just a few seconds for the waiter to get the rest of Jazz’s order, then they turned to Danny.  “And what are you having today?”

“Same as her,” said Danny, waving in Jazz’s general direction.  

“Good choice, good choice,” said the waiter.  “We’ll be back soon!”

“Thanks!” said Dad.  He reached over Mom to pat Danny on the shoulder.  “See?  This is just a completely normal restaurant.”

“Mhm,” said Danny, dubiously.  He’d believe it when he got out of here with his questionably mortal coil and squishy, murderable human family intact.    

Okay.  Maybe he was being a bit overdramatic, now.  Was it because he was too far from the Amity portal?  He’d been sure it wouldn’t significantly affect him, though. It wasn’t as if physical distance meant much in this context.  Sure, he wasn’t on his home turf, but still…

Of course, he was a teenager. Teenagers were supposed to be overdramatic.  At least, that’s what he’d heard.  Being a teenager didn’t come with a manual any more than being a half-ghost superhero did, quirky TV shows about middle school notwithstanding.  

Yeah.  That sounded reasonable.  He was a teenager who’d been woken early, and it was still early, and that meant the world was terrible.  Excellent math.  

He sipped at the water the waiter had left him, pleased with himself.  

Which is when his and Jazz’s orders arrived. Danny caught a glimpse of red on him plate, abruptly recognized the prickling feeling in his eyes, expelled the water he was drinking from his nose, and propelled himself sideways across Mom and Dad and out of the booth.  

“Ah!” he said, pointing at the red-tinted pancakes and the pretty little flowers on top.  

The plating really was nice.  Just like the waiter said.  

The whole dinner was staring at him.

“He’s got allergies,” explained Jazz, her voice just a little too high pitched.  “Just—Really horrible allergies.  To flowers like this.”

“Blood blossoms,” said Danny.  He was reasonably certain the things wouldn’t kill him, he wasn’t sure that anything short of something like Gula could kill him, but every encounter he had with them had been painful beyond belief, and he doubted that their being cooked would help very much with that.  

“Right.  Blood blossoms.  The name always slips by me…  Haha.”

“Oh my gosh,” said Marianne, rushing out of the kitchen.  “I am so sorry.  I didn’t know anyone was allergic to them!  It’s just, you guys always talked about how they were lucky, and they got rid of bad spirits, so I thought I’d incorporate them, and they’re red, which is also lucky, and they taste so good—”

“Marianne,” said Mom, poking at one of the flowers, “where did you even get these?  I thought they were extinct.”

“Oh,” said Marianne, “my uncle, the one who died, well I guess they’re all dead, now, but…  The one who left me enough to buy the dinner?  He worked in seed conservation.  I got his personal collection.”  She sniffed, apparently on the edge of tears.  

“Ah,” said Mom, glancing at Danny.  “That’s interesting.  Um.”  She slid out of the booth.  “I’m really sorry, Marianne, but,” she gestured in Danny’s direction.  “Food allergies.”

“He’s had breakouts just from being around them, before,” added Jazz, helpfully.  

“Oh, no, no, I understand.  Um.  One second, let me give you my number, I don’t want to fall out of contact again, oh, dear.  Tracy! Give me your notepad!”

It took several more minutes for all the Fentons to make their way back outside, most of which Danny spent staring into the dinner through the large front windows, keeping an eye on his family. Maybe he didn’t have ‘allergies’ in the typical sense but being around blood blossoms was making his skin itch and prickle unpleasantly.  

Eventually, however, after Dad had shoved most of his order down his throat in a single go, they all got back into the GAV.  

“Oh. My. Gosh,” said Jazz.  “You two have no normal friends.”

[loverofallthingssmart]

black swan! dex

okay so black swan! dex won the poll over neverseen! tam with a vote of 6:5 (not to worry voters! neverseen! tam is also coming!) and without further ado, here he is!

notes: same universe as black swan! sophie <3

[id: 3 edits of a young red-headed teenage boy. each edit has been edited to have a glitching effect. the first one covers the boy's eyes with a thick, black line. the text reads in all caps “black swan profile” in smaller font underneath, and crossed out reads “dexter alvin dizznee”.

the second edit is cooler and titled “background info”. covering the words is a huge, white confidential stamp. what you can see beyond the stamp is information listed out such as his abilities (technopath, alchemy), his family (mother: juline 'squall' dizznee, father: kesler dizznee, siblings: lex, rex, and bex dizznee, extended family: grady ruewen (maternal uncle), edaline ruewen (maternal aunt), sophie foster (adoptive cousin), and his status (“formerly exiled, now considered tertiary beneficiary of the company”). at the very top underneath the title reads "recommended for the agency"

the third edit is titled “status.” it reads in all caps, in order: “name: prattlebug”, “level five loyalty”, “liabilities: unpredictable, indifferent, underwhelming”, “training: accelerated”, “partner(s): "none, kesler dizznee, 'tinker'," (all of which have been crossed out) with “sophie foster” underneath", “mission: "material extraction” and "lab work" have been crossed out and “technical assistance” is in replacement. /end id]

also! i had soooo many thoughts on dex's backstory and what he did in the black swan so as per on course with eesha "needs to learn to shut up" loverofallthingssmart, headcanons under the cut!

first off:

(a tertiary beneficiary is the third person in line to inherit the assets of the company

(a tertiary beneficiary is the third person in line to inherit the assets of the company

i was gonna make him primary or secondary but then it makes more sense for actual family members of the nobility so like fitz and keefe .......

but sophies 'mom' is the ceo and sophie fought tooth and nail for her bff to get 3rd in line since he apparently wasnt allowed 1st or 2nd 🙄)

okay lets get started now.......

dex was in the black swan before sophie

kesler and juline both work in the black swan (juline's 'squall' and kesler's their head alchemist) because a spy family is the best family (proof: spy kids)

and dex's training says "accelerated" because kesler taught him all those skills such as breath and temperature regulation, and his levitation skills are like really good so he finished through the rigorous black swan training in record time

so his first mission was a field operation, just a quick in and out situation (according to the head of black swan)

that....decidedly did not happen.....

it was technically meant for an adult but since he finished his training quick, the head council was expecting an act of brilliance (which they were severely disappointed)

instead he barely made it out with the package he needed to bring and almost blew his cover and the location of the black swan (because dex rambles when he's nervous and he didn't notice that his mumbles weren't really...nonsensical...thank god he manipulated the camera system before he walked in

then, he was on probation for a month...

dex pretends like he cant hear the disappointment in mr forkle's voice when he announces dex's probation.. like he cant see everyone's looks of pity because they expected greatness from him

its a goddamn shame he's just mediocre.....

so he worked in the lab and was a junior alchemist under his father (which he was fine with!! i mean he loves alchemy and he's really good at it!! and with his dad there it almost feels like old times! ......doesn't stop the hurt he feels from being downgraded though)

then it was revealed he screwed with the electrical system and camera monitors on his mission which means he's a technopath (fuck he was trying to hide it)

and since then he's been out on tech assistance

he was previously just the second tech guy crunching the data and filling out the mission reports while someone else was the voice in the headpiece because he's the only teenager in this agency

until sophie joins

and then he's assigned her

sophie recognizes his voice immediately and since then they've been the best and youngest duo there since they already have an unbreakable bond of trust and familial and platonic love there

no one knows they know each others identity

and they plan to keep it that way.

ta-daaaaaaaa !! that's all i have so i hope you enjoyed!! <3