#It's hard to work on two AUs at once so Im focusing a lot on Decoded rn since im actively writing it
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littlecrittereli · 3 months ago
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I very much appreciate the subgenre of guardianship Chris art where its literally just him as the TBH creature
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Mini chris robando calor mini chris robando calor
No se que mas dibujar, den ideas
Mini Chris stealing warm mini Chris stealing warm
I don't know what to draw anymore, give ideas
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cider-est · 1 year ago
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An Idea for a Talent Swap Au (Spoilers!!)
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Thinking about how similar Min and Xander both are + the paralels between the two, I realised that maybe, if they had different circumstances, they could've had each others talents.
And thus this AU was born!!!
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I'll just ramble about some of the ideas I had (feat. some doodles i made). Btw if you dont understand my handwriting, I put a description on each image for accessibility purposes :] (let me know if I fucked them up pls!!) (also Im not a native english speaker so if I fuck up the grammar let me know aswell!!!)
Backstory changes!
I was mainly focused on making this as close in character and canon as I could? Like imagine if they had made one different choice and their lives would have changed completely, butterfly effect and shit.
This means that I had to come up with how they even got the talents in the first place and who they were before the killing game. This is what I ended up with!
In this Au, the Chariton incident did not happen, so Xander's family is alive and well. This means he did not have his realisation that school sucks and that Gpa doesn't matter.
As for Min, for some reason or another, (I've been toying around with the idea that she got burnt out) was not able to achieve the Ultimate Student title. We've seen that she can get quite angry about the school system, so I'd imagine she could take her frustration out on similar unjust systems.
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Dynamic between both of them
I also think they'd have a very interesting dynamic! First impressions, probably not great! Min would definitely have a lot of pity and compassion for Xander, having been in his situation before. I don't think Xander would be a big fan of that though, after all, in his eyes, Hope's Peak is a great institution which has given him the opportunity to be an Ultimate. I think his position would take Min by surprise, but she could later on understand where he comes from.
Maybe it's just my "Ex Religious Vibes (tm)" but I like to imagine that Xander would eventually disilusion himself with Hope's Peak. Although since they are on a killing game, the odds are low as fuck. The only way for that to happen during the killing game would have to be for Min to talk about her backstory.
However for that he'd have to 1. be willing to listen 2. Min would have to be willing to share her past (which, she doesn't really seem like the type to ""trauma dump"") so yeah;; not gonna happen.
A shame because they'd have a really cute dynamic. Personally I think they would behave kind of like siblings, bickering and fighting, but still caring for each other quite a bit. Feel free to interpret them as you wish though :3c.
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Personality, Talent, and misc. changes
In this Au, I wanted them to mostly keep their personality but have them impact the way they tackle their new talents + have some changes due to their new backstory.
Min, since in this au she's very familiar with pushing yourself beyound your limits and its consequences, I'd like to think she would have a more gentle side to her, and remind her fellow students when to take a break (much to their surprise). She wouldn't want people to be as hard on themselves as she once was.
As for her talent, I think she'd definitely be more thorough with her research, and more careful as to who she'd expose and how she'd expose them. She'd read a lot of sociology, psychology and law books; essentially mastering the theory side of her talent. However, due to her intimidating and unrelatable personality, she'd have to work extra hard to rally people and have them join her side.
Because Xander having survivor's guilt is so essential to his character, I wanted to sort of pay homage to that. However, since his family is alive, I replaced it with other forms of guilt. Moreso with the guilt of not being constantly productive that comes from toxic work habits, plus the guilt and cognitive dissonance that comes with participating in Hope's peak's shady pratices and yet feeling like you should be grateful for their generosity.
He still has a very fiery and passionate personality, which he keeps under wraps to maintain his "Very Responsible Ultimate Student" persona. Being so determined, I figured he wouldn't have such a big problem with motivation and procastination like Min, although he, kind of like Eden, would have a problem knowing when to stop and take breaks.
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Story changes?
I've not yet given too much thought on how this would change the story and I'll need to do a little but of guessing work. So, if I were to guess, Min would have to be the one to recieve the "kill teruko tawaki" letter and attempt to murder her, while Xander would be the one to stop her.
Her murder plan would probably be much more elaborate than Xander's, but she'd be easily overpowered by an enraged Xander. I don't know what would happen after that? My ideal scenario would be Min giving up on murdering Teruko and they all stay alive but...yeah no. Someone's gotta die and narrative-wise it makes sense for these two to die.
I don't think Xander would try very hard to hide his crime. The solving would probably be mostly figuring out Min's murder plan. He wouldn't straight up admit it, but he wouldn't fight the accusations very much. I think David would be the one to defend him, he'd get really depressed, but hey! Atleast he gets closure in this au :').
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Dynamics with the others?
I've not yet thought about how their relantionship with the others would change aside from Xander would probs try not to get into fights (and fail) while Min could be more confrontational but still plenty antisocial. Anyway!!,here's an extra doodle on their thoughts on David.
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Anyways that's all I have for now!! If you liked this au, feel free to add on to it or borrow ideas, that'd be hella sick!!! Just give me some credit and it's fine.
Also as a reminder: [[Do not repost my art anywhere else]]
Thank you for reading!!
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amethystjewel01 · 28 days ago
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Yknow what fuck it, I don't need to draw IM JUST GONNA USE THAT ONE TWST PICREW FOR VISUAL AID (wouldn't be their full designs because I only use picrews just to get an idea across)
There's about 6 kids so buckle up (also I should say this is technically an au as no ship is canon or end goal for my Ramtrio, I can't decide one for them)
We're gonna go from oldest to youngest
Alois Schoenheit
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He/Him, 3rd year, 189cm
VA claim: Nicholas Thurkettle (specifically his role of Von Lycaon from ZZZ, but softer)
UM: "Enchanted Wish" After speaking the encantation "A wish you make, is all that is takes. May your wish become as true as your dreams." Alois will see various visions related to the whatever the person wishes for, though for only a few seconds before becoming fully conscious again. After recounting what he remembers it is then up to the person to work for that wish to come true. It takes up a lot of Alois' magic so he rarely mentions what it does.
"Oh hello...what do you want."
Alois is very much a calm and collected type of character, as he seems to have a lot of patience (probably because of his younger sister). He doesn't really show anger even when insulted, though things are different if his family is the one being insulted. Then you've truly unleashed verbal hell. He won't cuss, but you'll wished he just cussed you out instead.
He doesn't really care about the entertainment industry, so he's very private about his personal life a lot of the time. He doesn't have many close friends because of that but he doesn't really mind it at all. As long as no one gets in his way he doesn't get in others'.
Trivia: He can actually sing really good, like he could've been a famous child if he wanted to. He doesn't like for people to know this though so he purposely sings badly to get people off his back.
When he was little he used to be picked on for his clothing choices, but now no one says anything (most likely because two of his three parents are scary when angry)
He gets along with his mother mostly since they share a bond over wanting to live in peace (though that's hard when the other two are famous actors).
He regularly visits NRC to check in on his mom, Yuuki, to make sure her and Grim's classes aren't stressing them out. This is how he ends up meeting Ruby.
Animals seem to flock to him whenever he's alone and relaxing, he doesn't really mind them as he focuses on his reading.
Alois also actually had selective mutism when he was younger, he's grown out of it for the most part and able to talk softly. But it will come back if in a very stressful situation (like paparazzi hounding).
Malin Draconia
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She/Her, 3rd Year, 176cm
VA claim: Anne Yatco (specifically her role as Ei in Genshin Impact but more energetic and slightly higher pitch)
UM: "Spindling Wheel." Is able to put a person into a deep slumber that cannot be awakened unless certain conditions are met. Not even Malrin herself can undo the powerful curse even if she wanted to.
"Greetings humans! A-Ah wait! Don't be scared!"
Now Malin here is your typical kind crown princess character, though she does have a bit of a temper that not even her fathers can control at times. Though once calm she is apologetic and gives loads of gifts as she believes that's proper human custom.
She doesn't have much thought about the differences between fae and humans, so she's pretty clueless just how fragile humans can be in comparison to faeries. This is usually how her unintentional intimidation happens, though her status enough of a scare factor.
Trivia: How she was born is a bit...unusual, as both Yuuto and Malleus were fighting while in blot form and their combined magic somehow...became her. No one has that much explanation, but it ended up with her both having very powerful magic thanks to her bloodlines. Neither male wasn't certain on what to do but, they decided to raise her together. Though they aren't officially married.
Thanks to this powerful magic she possesses, she's actually the one that conjured her younger sister alive! Again no one had a total explanation, just one day Malin was having a tantrum on wanting a younger sister. And then the next, suddenly a healthy baby girl was sleeping in Yuuto's bed. You can imagine the confusion when the dna results came in.
She actually uses her magic to hide her horns, as she wanted to blend in more with the general population. Sadly it didn't help as her first day at NRC she had nearly smited someone with lightning in anger, which cemented her heritage.
Thorn Rosehearts
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He/They, 2nd, 191cm
VA claim: Alejandro Saab (specifically his role as Yuri Leclerc from FE3H, but slightly deeper)
UM: "Curiouser and Curiouser." Must first be activated by the phrase "Who. Are. You." and when the person answers with their name then Thorn can gain access to their memories and abilities for a short time.
"Hm? Well look what the cheshire cat dragged in~ What's a pretty face like you doing here?"
Thorn is your typical playboy flirt, his usual target being Malin and Malorie. He doesn't really discriminate who he flirts with, though he's never heavy handed with it. Other than his flirting he's pretty chill, usually not one to express anger much either. Which surprises people when he mentions who his father and twin are.
As his twin, Ruby, is the dorm leader for Heartslabyul. Most think he's vice leader because of the family closeness but he refuses the position every time Ruby brings it up, as he doesn't really enjoy being in a position of authority.
Trivia: He has a small scar on his cheek, it came about when he and Ruby were young. They had founded Riddle's old school pen (hc that they get to keep them after graduating) in his office and Ruby had accidentally sent a small whirlwind within the room. Causing a lamp to break and a shard cutting Thorn's cheek. Ruby cried over it but Thorn just thought it made him look cool.
The reason why Thorn is tanner than Ruby is mainly because his mom's genes hit him hard, so he tans easier than his twin. It had to take some explaining from Yuuna that they were part mexican to make the twins understand when they were younger.
Occasionally Thorn and Yuuna share a laugh as they watch their family members struggle to each anything close to their spice level.
Surprisingly he gets along with his father super well, even if they have disagreements on certain views they're both very respectful of each other. Though he does like to push Riddle's buttons at times, mainly because he always found his red face funny.
Ruby Rosehearts
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She/Her, 2nd, 160cm
VA claim: Erika Harlacher (specifically her role as Ann Takumi from P5, but slightly lower pitch)
UM: "My Way." When activated whoever Ruby aims her magic at will fall under her control, and will follow her every order until the spell is lifted. The more under the spell and more blot accumulates rapidly.
"Welcome to Heartslabyul! Care for a game?"
Ruby is very much like her father, though she prefers to the follow the rules loosely. For example if she weren't up for lemon tea after a meal she would still drink a different kind of tea with two sugar cubes. She believes there must be a balance, something her mother taught her many times when she was young whenever Riddle had a moment of unnecessary strictness.
But one thing that didn't change in their likeness is that she has the same temper as her father, maybe even shorter. While she's able to remain calm once an argument ensues, she's not able to keep her voice down once her face has turned red. Once she's beginning to threaten to use her magic is when only Thorn can calm her down.
Trivia: Ruby likes to write letters to her parents every month or so, updating them on how she and her twin are doing. She knows she could just text, but she finds it relaxing and fun to write. If you were to somehow get your hands on the letters between them, you may have a hard time reading if you can't read very intricate cursive.
She also has a massive crush on Alois, so whenever he visits she's always can be seen admiring from afar. Once she's managed to talk to him (Thorn practically pushed her into him) she's a blushing mess, but over time she can usually hide her blush.
She wouldn't tell anyone about this, but she actually slightly prefers blueberries over strawberries. She doesn't dislike strawberries, she still loves them! But usually she leaves the blueberries for last whenever they're on a tart.
Malorie Draconia
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She/Her, 1st, 148cm
VA claim: Cassandra Lee Morris (specifically her roles as both Morgana from P5 and Sothis from FE3H, but slightly lower pitch)
UM: ???
"Hmph, what?"
Malorie is very...antisocial, not in the anxious shy way. But...she just very much likes to keep to herself, unless that is being with her older sister. It's not that she's unkind to just humans, she's the same with other fae. She actually forces her way to stay at Ramshackle, as she knew most wouldn't stay there. She does appreciate the nightly visits Malin does to check on her.
While she doesn't get into fights to get people away from her, she's not afraid to use what little magic she has to intimidate them. Luckily her parentage already helps cause otherwise it would be found out that she doesn't have as much magic reserve as the average person, meaning she could blot very easily.
Trivia: Neither her nor her elder sister know abut her true birth, as both their fathers believed it would be better to keep it a secret.
She's obvious about her disgust for Thorn whenever she sees him approaching, not above insulting and intimidating him at every chance. She only gets angrier whenever her intimidation doesn't work, it doesn't help when Malrin is there as well and stops her from being rude. Malorie tries to explain what she believes his intentions are but her sister doesn't understand.
The angrier she gets the more of her draconic traits show, with her horns growing bigger and her eyes becoming sharper.
Naomi Schoenheit
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She/They, 1st, 168cm
VA claim: Kate Higgins (specifically her role as Lissa from Fire Emblem Awakening)
UM: "A Million Diamonds Shine!" Can conjure jewels out of thin air, takes various amounts of magic depending on the size and amount.
"Hihi!! Have you seen Alois around? No? Oh okay, bye!"
Naomi is a giddy excitable kind of girl, she gets along with pretty much everyone (even Malorie when they eventually meet) and just loves to hang out with her brother. Though she has a tendency to get lost, which is how she makes friends so quickly as usually someone will help her find her way.
While her brother, Alois, doesn't want to be a part of the entertainment industry, she actually wants to follow her father's and papa's path of becoming an actor! She usually has fun playing with voice acting protagonists in cartoons or video games the most, but she does have some small roles in movies and TV shows.
Trivia: She has a weird sixth sense about where Alois is, so while she does get lost she usually ends up finding him pretty quickly. This sixth sense also applies to her other family members, which can freak Vil out when she unknowingly wanders into a set because she had a feeling he was there. Neige actually finds it adorable and just laughs whenever she pops up by him on set. Yuuki is just used to it and lets Naomi do her thing whenever she pops up at NRC accidentally. Her ahoge will actually jump a bit in a cartoonish fashion when she detects a family member.
Because of how she acts, most for some reason assume she's a boy at first. She doesn't bother correcting them because she just doesn't honestly care. Though even when she's smiling it's obvious she's miffed when someone realizes and underestimates her.
Usually a common sight is seeing her yapping at Alois somewhere on campus while he's reading his book with various woodland critters around them.
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that-starry-freak · 1 month ago
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NEJENSUDND I've been thinking about my Project Refuge au so hard
And not even about the main characters. I love everything that happens before the main characters meet, and the stuff happening in the background after they do
I've been seeing one my my mutuals (sillymoonboi, go check them out their art is GREAT) posting about their planet-based ocs, and its been making me think about my own
Denjeneres so of course I'm going to yap about them (TLDR AT THE BOTTOM!!!)
So the au they're from, the Project Refuge au, or Pr au, is an au that kind of is an rp by me and my friend. Its based on Dusk Lounge by KriimHild (and I have their permission to post about my au!), or at least the base concept of it! (Afton having a club that staffs and helps bots in need, I mean. Anything else similar to DL is purely a coincidence, and often was made by my friend, who knows nothing about DL!)
In the PR au, Afton, a man who used to own a large business with his partner which he ended up selling, runs a club for Animatronics only. Its staff contains (in order of them coming to the club):
Ivy, a human mechanic. She joined Afton's cause as soon as she heard about it, wanting to help any bots she could, hating how they were treated in society
Vanessa, Afton's right hand man. She came in after Ivy, yet Afton listens to her a lot more than Ivy. She's quiet and cold, and the animatronics rarely ever see her
Julia, shes... complicated. She did household chores and ran errands for her owner before, and once he died she ran away. She now does whatever to help out around. She does Sun's makeup, orders supplies, helps to clean up around, and just generally helps to take care of the other staff
Sun, a former sex bot who now is a stripper. Afton sees him as practically his child, and if everyone in the club is his children, then Sun is absolutley the favorite
Glitch, a former body gaurd who now is the bartender. He's defiently the one with the most complicated relationship to Afton.
Virus, a former nanny who is now a janitor. He has a very, very complicated relationship with Glitch, and is the only one in the club who dislikes him (other than A, but he hates everyone)
Andromeda, a guy. He does music stuff for the club? Idk, he's my friends character and he genuinely has 0 backstory im pretty sure. He's jsut the love interest to Virus
Deitrack, a shark animatronic (the only non-celestial animatronic at the plex) who works as secuirty at the club. Idk, he's my friends character. He's a giant shark guy, he freaks out at the smell of blood and tries to attack people. Idk
Luna (deadname Moon), a former daycare attendant who worked at the mega pizzaplex who now is the singer for the club. He has the biggest character arc in the au and I LOVE him
Eclipse, a former secuirty guard for the mega pizzaplex who now is a little waiter for the little dining area they have in the club. He's so forgotten about, he's important in the beginning of the au and then he's gone
Echo, a human who used to work at the mega pizzaplex but now is now Afton's personal body guard. He joined after sneaking in to check on Luna and Clip, who he heard were now there, and after he got caught the two pled his case and he was allowed to stay. He was a security gaurd for awhile, before switching role with Nova as Afton found it would make more sense, and they both agreed.
Nova, a former body gaurd who is now a secuirty guard. He has a.. complicated backstory with Glitch. He was Afton's personal body guard for awhile, before switching role with Echo as it made more sense
Okay so those are the club characters
I'm going to be focusing more on Sun, Glitch, Virus, Nova, and a few background characters and their intertwined backstories in this, as well things happening behind the scenes in the au. I'll post a timeline and relationships and stuff for the actual contents of the au at- some point
this is also about the creation of celestial animatronics in this au!!!
Okay, so-
Glitch, Virus, and Nova were bought and costumized by a rich couple, Martha and William (not Afton), along with three other bots, named Orbit, Rosie, and a bitch named Violet that isn't important shh.
Martha and William had 2 children, a little girl (~10) and a little boy (~6). Virus took care of these kids, being a Nanny for them.
Glitch and Nova were body guards by day, hitmen by night. They protected Martha and William, and did their dirty work. As well as often being used by an organized crime group that practically ran the city, a group that Martha and William supported, being close with their leader
Rosie was the only android, and a sex bot for the two. I'm not going to go into any detail about it because honestly, there isn't much as I dont like thinking about it.
Orbit was the maid
Violet was the grounds keeper and gardened
Rosie and Glitch were close, being best friends. Glitch and Nova were also close, but uh- in a very different way (they were gay)
Uhhhh
Rosie ran away a lot but was always brought back. One day Martha and William were tired of it, and on her next escaoe attempt they set out Glitch to hunt her down
Glitch was coded to obey their commands, he was a killing machine.
So he did as told. It was a fitting, storming night as he chased her down. As he killed her and shoved her in an alleyway to die (or be decommissioned, i guess, as she is a robot still)
Glitch was distraught, even more so that he had been the one to do it. He never really enjoyed killing much after that
Martha and William barely even cared about Rosie's death, just getting another bot, this one a celestial animatronic named Sun. None of the other animatronics ever met Sun while at the mansion, and they didn't even realize that Sun was the new sex bot long after they finally met at the club.
This was normalcy for awhile, just living with him as the new bot, yada yara idk. Until one Sun tried to escape
This time, Glitch didn't listen to orders. Instead, he lashed out at his owners, killing Martha and William.
Nova freaked out. After all, this could get them decommissioned. Virus was also panicked, what about the children??
Nova and Glitch fought, Glitch ran away. Nova and Virus stayed to take care of the kids till the police got there, then high tailed it out of there. Orbit also left at some point, Violet- uh- yeah idk what happened to him he probably died
And uh yeah thats how they all left the mansion a day went to the club.
Well.. some of them. Orbit isn't at the club!
He was instead found by two bots: Meteor and Comet (twins)
These two had been part of the crime group (it wasn't really their choice, they had no where else to go), but was unhappy with how they, yknow, weren't good people. And they hope the "mafia" or whatever tf would get better once two animatronic dons (Dusk and Dawn) stepped into power, promising change, but they realized they didn't have good intentions and high tailed it out of there.
They set it out to be their mission to stop Dusk and Dawn from hurting people.
So with the help of Orbit (who was honestly just happy to have a place to stay), and 12 other animatronics, they work to counteract the harm the group causes
Now you may be asking who are these other 12 people? Well, time for a (fictional) history lesson!
The first Celestial animatronics were made for a cirus
Not just any circus! It was practically a world-renowned one. With dual ringmasters, a sun and a moon, as well as 9 animatronics that represented planetd, and another younger bot.
These were N. Moon, Red, Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Urie, Neptune, Pluto, and Nebula.
(Okay chat I took a pause for about half am hour and now were back and explaining this again. I'm tired and my anxeity is fuckimg with me so were gonna speedrun this cause I want to draw)
They were the performers of the circus. Their designs were unique and inspirational.
And then one day the circus burned to the ground
It still isn't known how, but it did. And every animatronic inside was damaged in some way, and all scrapped.
Luckily, the legacy lived on and people made more and more celestial animatronics in hope of copying that magic.
One day two of these new celestial animatronics (Meteor and Comet!) Found these scrapped animatrinics and brought them back to life
But they weren't able to find Pluto do he's dead/he was decommissioned long before the circus burnt down when Pluto was decided not to be a planet (idk I haven't decided)
And uh... yeah! Thats that- ill probably be explaining stuff about the Pr au a lot- im currently thinking about it quite a bit, so expect character introductions and relatioship explanations and things!
Tldr:
The Project Refuge au is inspired on Dusk Lounge by KriimHild
The pr au centers around a robot-only club that was started by Afton, where runaway bots can stay there. The workers are Ivy, Vanny, Julia, Sun, Glitch, Virus, Deitrack, Luna, Eclipse, Echo, and Nova (in order of joining the club)
Sun, Glitch, Virus, and Nova used to work at a mansion together, along with Orbit, Violet, and Rosie (who died before Sun got there)
The concept of Celestial animatronics was created by a guy who had a circus. These original celestials were New Moon, Red Dwarf, Nebula, and 9 others who were based off the planets in our solar system. The circus ended up burning down
Two twin celestials named Meteor and Comet fixed these animatronics (-Pluto) as well as took Orbit in. They're like a little family. Their main goal is to stop a crime organization (THAT THE WORD I FORGET THE WORD THROUGH THIS ENTIRE POST TILL NOW) that runs the city
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ya-killin-me-smalls · 10 months ago
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i apologize for the text wall you are about to recieve i'm facing my fears of being an annoyance in the inbox
hey what do i do when i have several fixations happening all at once
my madcom keeps coming into the house because its cold but then goes back out because yay snow
the funkin won't leave the pantry because i keep coming back to the Tall Modded Men
deltarune deltarune deltarune deltarune
undertale is returning with a baseball bat because it refuses to be left behind in my elementary days (i promise you my AU content won't be based on fanon i've been tracking little details in the game i'm not cring pleas e don't sentence me to the swamp of sin)
im not sure if i'm going back to my fnaf phase i'm just very fond of the sundrop models i find on VRChat
MINECRAFT!!1!1!1!!!
and it doesn't help that i want (personally i have to i live off making silly little worlds with different stories and flavors) to make AU content the neurodivergent courses through my veins it will never end
this is a really good question that I don't see a lot of people asking so it's hard to find good advice for this
best advice I can give as a neurospicy individual is to not fight your attention span when it comes to hobbies. with school and work you don't have much of a choice but remember there are no deadlines or consequences in fandom
like I feel kinda bad for not having updated my two big fics in 2-3 months but y'know the juice just isn't there. I like quality and if I'm not interested it won't be quality. I try to keep my blog madcom focused because that's what people followed me for but trust me right now I'm all about my gta dude, sonic, batfam, mw2, and others I can't remember on top of madness combat
I can't give advice for artblock because I don't draw unless I absolutely want to, but for writing at least I find that outlining costs way less mental energy so even if I'm not putting together a new fic/chapter, I can still plan to with relative ease
but yeah neurodivergence doesn't always mean there's something wrong, sometimes it just means your brain works different and I don't think it's productive to try and force it to work another way. do what sparks joy. if your ideas are cringe, kill the cop in your brain because the entire premise of madcom would sound cringe if a 12 year old described it as their superhero backstory. what makes or breaks a story is the presentation of it, not the idea itself
also feel free to combine things you're fixating on. I was on a horror kick, decided to incorporate it with fandom (have not finished it because oh my god horror is so hard to write)
having people to bounce ideas off of is really helpful too because it can help you focus more on that one thing, as I'm sure you saw with the AU I'm working on right now. feel free to yell about stuff in my inbox if you'd like, don't know all those fandoms but I'm happy to listen
music also helps with focus, find a song that fits the vibe of what you want out of your work and set it to repeat. normal behavior I know but it worked for me
ultimately, don't stress. the mojo comes and goes, it's more cooperative if you are. fandom isn't a job or any sort of obligation and you can write, draw, headcanon whatever you want. sometimes multitasking is helpful because you can step back from something and then come back refreshed after working on another thing
hope this makes sense because it feels all over the place but yeah that's basically what I've learned to do
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popstart · 3 months ago
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hi can we get your heathney thoughts and hc </3 ur ppp fic was so good i read it all in one day i love the dynamic u gave them
talking about ppp in the past tense is kind of killing meee(i want to work on it again idk whats up i just have writers block infinity and health problems + phys disability flareups. blehhh) anyways once i get to it again is when its gonna get good. rn its just setup for setup BUT IM GLAD YOU LIKE IT SO FAR! yay ^_^! truthfully i see way too much wrong with it and want to fix a lot and thats part of why i havent touched it in like. um 7 months🤐. lemme retcon some things and fix the pacing and itll be GOOODDDD...
heathney is literally just whatever i feel like forcing onto them at the moment because when i was writing hcag and ppp there was like... 3 fics for them HELP😭 and i had a different idea in my head than the ones i half-read. i havent really touched ao3 in the same last 7 months so im not sure if its different now but bc it was bleak for a while i kinda just made stuff up and hoped it stuck with people (which apparently it did. im glad people like my work :3)
my thinking about them started when i was writing/drafting heartaches (im still writing for it too. auahghh🫠) it was all spawned by a random train of thought that i wish world tour was less focused on alejandro and more on the dynamic that could have formed around heather and courtney PURELY because of that 1 second scene where heather was comforting courtney. thats literally it that entire fic was spawned by two seconds and some anons egging me on bc it was an idea other people were interested in. I wanted to delve into the thought process of heather behind that. like how genuine was that scene to heather and how impactful was it to courtney. basically I just thought the idea of heather taking advantage of courtney when she was so volatile and emotionally clingy sounded evil and fun. i literally just didnt like that courtney got so into alejandro bc i hate that man so much so i swapped some things around and got hcag
sorry for being the ultimate tangent master im finally getting back to ppp heathney. anyways. Having been writing the sort of dynamic of heather and courtney being weird teammates that are only using eachother but also in it for their own emotional clingyness reminded me of my FAVORITE SHOW EEVRRR lps populaarr🙈🙈🙈🙈 and also aus of that show i love so i stole the concept. in my mind they became childhood besties for the resties until they got separated then hated eachother when they met up years later. With the way i was writing heather in hcag i was thinking soooo hard about how fucked up courtney couldve been if she had an influence like heather as a kid. this is also going back to my time in the amphibia fandom oops i hella stole everything for that fic and tweaked some things.
I dont think ppp is the heathney dynamic of all time because its literally shit i made up and stole and inserted into a really self indulgent fic, BUT it is a dynamic i love for them in the setting of the au its in. heather being so so so controlling to courtney as kids and courtney having no friends to base this behavior off of thinking its normal. aughh... they have opposite levels of social skills which makes their communication shit which entertains me. Heather knows what she wants from people and knows how to get it, and she doesnt notice (or care) how harmful she can be. Courtney doesnt know how to talk to people very well and has a very twisted grasp of what people think about her, in her eyes being the most well liked person on the planet and throwing a tissy fit every time thats challenged. im gonna say it 20 times but it just grasps me way too hard and it gets my brain thinking forever and ever about them. courtney as is very much a "i want what i want and ill get it" kind of person but in ppp heather is so good at manipulating her that the kinds of personality traits she shows in canon are very much suppressed (whether that was on accident or on purpose from heather is technically spoilers? for ppp i guess). theyre still there but hidden from years of being friends with heather as a child. LOL BASICALLY. i hope its obvious but despite their deep friendship as a child and how much love (and rose tinted glasses) they had for eachother and the past, that shit was NOT HEALTHY!!!! AT ALL!
so heather is really good at manipulating and courtney was the one that ended up on the brunt of it all. not surprising, we all know what heather is like, but COURTNEY.. ohh im so sorry about what i do to her im constantly fucking her up because i just love to see how she reacts to it. she is so reactive and emotional and i love it. i love seeing such an intelligent and confident woman be so weak to her own damn self UGH it kills me inside but i cant look away i need to mess her up constantly. Courtney in ppp has such an interesting perspective to write because i can insert some random ass idea into her head and play it off because she is emotionally STUPID! you can truly make her think anything thats at an extremely juvenile level of emotional awareness/understanding and you'll be able to play it off because she has way too much confidence in herself while knowing very little outside of academics and very clear-cut rule oriented things. the way it plays into her thoughts about heather too.. oohhhh. evil evil stuff.. she knows heather is considered a bad person and she also sees herself as being better than everyone in every way so she cant mentally stoop down to heathers level of brutality, meanwhile because of the way she sees herself shes constantly thinking bad of others and people see them very similarly. Courtney doesnt realize it but she is on a veryy similar playing field to heather in terms of how people see them. it would be gutting if she ever realized but her brain does Not let her see it that way. i just love courtney corruption arc ok orz. i need heather to play into it so damn bad. it grabs me so hard.
anyways this is quite messy and very spur of the moment but these are basically my thoughts on them. i want them to make eachother worse but in the most fucked up way imaginable. i want them to have the most deep and complicated history ever
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cielospeaks · 1 year ago
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it would be just. pure and utter fanservice. but
aime getting taros-style possessed by different allegrofaces in the unnamed crossover thing, and kinda being out of sorts the whole time (the focus is on kind of “lost souls finding their way home” which. to be fair is literally every one of my aus/stories/etc. but this ones focusing on being able to work through trauma to be able to live a somewhat fulfilling life in specific)
which under cut bc it can get rambly. i think is uh. lacking. in a lot of media at least thats been popular recently. ok ill say it im salty at f h and its consumer fans for acting like trauma is just something that can be “erased”. like (x character) being literally murdered by their parental figure but hey theyre wearing colorful clothing that means they have no depression now, or (y character) being tortured so hard that her “heart” went away and was basically a weapon, only to regain a slight bit of happiness after being spared by two people and befriended by another, but haha now lets make her act ooc and speak in full sentences and the fandom acts like “lol she has no depression now” its not that fucking simple you assholes.
anyways i think the whole main cast are both reflections of canon characters that have trauma and also their own thing, i noticed when writing up the bios. kr vel is very sal energy, like sal he’s partly a spiteful, violent person and partly someone who accepted responsibility and was the better person in a hard situation, and because of this merging he doesnt like to accept praise as being for him, since he attributes it to his “better half” but now theyre the same person. idk its hard to explain. i think its a bit fantastical but it is relatable i think to some extent to me personally. tbh i think its a feeling that anyone whos ever been objectified for like. one talent or skill and then hated once they showed other sides of themselves can feel. you like. have trust issues of whether people are being kind to you because they only know that side or whatever.
for laurie, shes similar to ai, she lost someone she was extremely close to (in laurie’s case her rival) and feels a lot of survivor guilt plus a feeling of wanting to sacrifice herself, but she tries to maintain a giving and optimistic personality on top of this. like she still thinks shed be better off dead/erased and still feels immensely guilty abt what happened to her rival.
for the allegros i think its a mixed bag. this was the only option for them that lead to all of them surviving, but its not the best. i mostly wanted ana to tell off someone or tell off the sort of trope at least, bc i feel like ana would tell off a divinity that tries to use people for selfish reasons, but would also tell off equally so any humans that claimed to be liberators and heroes when they actually just wanted to usurp said divinity in manipulating others. ana is a good boy. best boy. i also think ana possessing aime and doing a saisho kara saisho made climax daze would be hilarious (he instantly gets the copyright bonk w laurie)
tuley is more of a mentor to these idiots (affectionate). she can see theyre going through a lot and can sympathize but she also needs them to get their shit together also.
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spicedddrum · 10 months ago
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Hey Im fucking BACK
so. I love thinking about this kind of thing so I went a LITTLE hard when considering it.
First some notes- something I love about M9 and CR is the outfit details and keeping them to character.
M9 specifically seemed to do a really good job of keeping similar silhouettes across everyones looks. Calebs always got a trenchcoat scarf and tunic, beau always has a mid-riff, sleeveless overcoat and her Cobalt Soul sash, ETC
SO LETS LOOK AT MOLLY
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He has his coat, a very important piece to him. I think Matt and Tal had already set up that this was a gift from someone important. I think Molly is sentimental about everyone he's ever loved and keeps things to remember them by. His other design elements are obviously circus-y. His jewelry is costume jewelry and his clothes are hand-me-downs from circus-folk.
Design wise he is VERY harlequin. Which i fucking love. SO. MUCH. he is the most beautiful and genuine clown.
Right now he's so young, only two years old really! any memories he has is leftover nightmares of some sort of flesh city. He's happy to forget whatever the fuck THATs about am embrace these new families he's found.
SO. HIS FIRST REDESIGN LOOK
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I tried to keep the important details, open chested shirts are mentioned with him and lucien so its ESSENTIAL 👏 plus he needs some sort of skin showing to do his blood magic. The inconveniently tall boots are enough essential to his character. Even Kingsley has them.
He's kept the coat up to this point because it's important to him and he's worked so hard on it besides. He's also kept his circus leggings because theyre perfectly good and make his legs looks great why would he replace them?
Otherwise I focused mostly on mirroring Jester's second look. I think him and Jester would be terrible influences on eachother while shopping. I also bet that with new money and thieving friends he would finally get nice jewelry instead of cheap costume stuff.
I will admit i am fuzzy on the ENTIRE MIDDLE of the campaign but by the time they get their first updated art i believe theyve been to shadycreek which inevitably means more things about Lucien and the Tombtakers has surfaced. Molly is probably still fully in the boat of not wanting to know anything about any of that but I can almost guarantee beau would start digging in to those sore spots once they keep running in to more people who knew Lucien.
I think theyve also met Vess and been to Xorhaus by now?
Matt also mentioned that if what had happened hadn't he was interested in having Lucien be a reoccuring antagonist for them. I optimistically think this means Molly would be forced to have a face to face conversation with him at least once by now.
FINAL LOOK, AEOR RUINS
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This is my favorite one I leaned a lot on fanon Lucien for this as well as taking a bit of inspo from BG3 fashion lmao
I tried to keep the important silhouette bits I mentioned before, open shirt, tall boots, long coat. BUT i think its unrealistic that that coat makes it to the end of their adventure without being TRASHED either over time or all at once. I think Molly would do his best to salvage fabric and ideas from it (sentimental bastard)
I think that even if everything had happened differently they still would have ended up in the Aeor ruins in the end. All roads led north as it were. In this AU Molly's had to either face Lucien and his reality physically and/or mentally. this is MY reality so i get to pick my favorite outcome which is that Molly sort of talks Lucien down and sort of absorbs those fragments of psychology back in to himself, experiencing his memories from a second hand POV in a way.
Sort of how Kingsley refers to molly and lucien as his siblings I think Molly would end up with a similar sort of affection and empathy for Lucien.
I don't think Molly wants to fully let go of his circus past, that's him for sure but I also think he's not trying so hard to run from Luci at this point, allowing some of his influence in to his look 😌
EDIT: ALSO. THANK YOU FOR THIS. I FEEL LIKE IVE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK ME THIS FOR YEARS. I HAD SO MUCH FUN
Any ideas for potential Molly outfit changes we could have gotten?
lots actually. so many that i will be returning to this later in the day hopefully with sketches
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bbhyeoliskooks · 3 years ago
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i just saw that your reqs are open!! how do you think txt would react in a soulmate au (like those stuff where you would write on your body and your soulmate can see it) im sorry if this doesnt make sense!! have a nice day <33
꒰ “𝗛𝗼𝗺𝗲, 𝗦𝘄𝗲𝗲𝘁 𝗛𝗼𝗺𝗲.” ꒱
TXT as your soulmates.
◌ Genre: Lots of fluff <3
◌ Warnings: None!
◌ Song: Home
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ꗃ YE♡NJUN: a soulmate au where you see colors only after you’ve met your soulmate !!
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◌ In a world where you lived in black and white, you had no clue how lucky it’d be to live with color 
◌ You remember how your parents- who had fallen in love with each other years before you were born- would describe it to you; the color blue being the (currently) gray sky filled with white cotton candy clouds, the color pink fresh with love and pureness of romance...
◌ When you heard it at first, you thought it was stupid. You didn’t need a soulmate- you were fine by yourself and that’s what mattered the most at the time!
◌ However, curiosity prodded into your head and now you had the want to see these colors that were everywhere around you... Evidently as you grew older, this desire too grew stronger and you were dying to at least experience what every other teenager was seeing
◌ Usually soulmates met when they were in their teenage years but you... you hadn’t yet, causing you to grow discouraged. Did you even have a soulmate? What was the point of waiting if they were never going to come?
◌ You decided that focusing on your studies would be better, even if you heard the constant chatter and sudden burst of happiness once someone found their soulmate somewhere in public
◌ It didn’t weigh on your mind anymore that you hadn’t found your soulmate- a rare case since everyone mostly meets their one true love during their teenage years- but hey... like always you had yourself
◌ That was until one day you were strolling to the cafe, hoping to study there at least a couple of times to prepare for your exams
◌ Unfortunately (or fortunately!), you weren’t watching where you were going and you felt a body push forward into you, causing you to almost fall to the floor
◌ Just in time the stranger had caught you, his arms hurriedly embracing your back so you wouldn’t plummet to the ground
◌ Immediately your eyes caught his and you gulped nervously, accidentally dropping the books in your hands
◌ He smiled softly at you, his eyebrow raising in amusement and you swore you could almost die from how hard your heart was pounding
◌ “Wow,” he grinned genuinely, gazing right into your eyes with pure admiration and clearly love at first sight, “although the world is beautiful with colors, you’re far more better than I could’ve imagined, even in black and white.”
◌ “Yeah,” you agreed, mirroring his smile that you couldn’t get enough of. “No other color or painting could ever amount to you too.”
◌ And just like that, your first sight filled with color was the love of your life
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ꗃ S♡♡BIN: a soulmate au where your soulmate is warmer when they’re closer to you and cold when you’re far !!
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◌ In some cases, when you’re far away from your soulmate, sometimes you’d die from feeling so cold from the inside
◌ It’d affect your physical health slowly, eating you away from how much you longed to be with them, which is why destiny (as you called it) always put you two together ever since the beginning of time
◌ Fortunately, you and Soobin were literally close together; he lived as your next door neighbor for as far as you remember because your mothers made a promise to live next together when they were older
◌ Did that mean you were married and happily being smiley and all with each other?
◌ Well, no. Not quite from the beginning
◌ You and Soobin did not get along together easily, even if you were soulmates
◌ There was a difference in personality; he liked stuff like this and you liked stuff like that so activities or clubs would NOT work out well if he had to stray away from you at a distance
◌ Clearly, you didn’t like to talk each other much but! There was always this cozy warmness bringing you back to each other whenever things got rough and you knew you could make it work if he made an effort as well
◌ Your mothers saw this personality difference as a problem and hoped to make it work between you two themselves
◌ They decided to dedicate a whole week for the two of you, where you two could learn about each others’ interests by actually
◌ You loved it just as much as he did. The big grin on his face whenever he watched you do something stupid let you know that he cared about you just as much as you did for him
◌ On the last day- which was a comparably lazy day after the tiring but fun week- you were out camping and your parents allowed you to have a “sleepover” with Soobin
◌ After a lot of fun and games where the two of you had actually bonded together, you happily ran your fingers over his hair, smiling to yourself as you embraced this foreign warmness
◌ Honestly, it was nice just to be this close to him. For as long as you knew, you two weren’t the best soulmates, claiming to hate each other whenever there was a disagreement in opinion- as immature as it sounds. But now everything changed and you were so thankful for what your mothers did. 
◌ Quietly, you laid one kiss on his forehead before falling asleep yourself, holding him close to you since you too knew that he loved being warm as well
◌ The next day when your mothers were expecting you two to be at each others’ throats, you were sleeping peacefully in the tent beside them, just hugging each other as lovingly as you could
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ꗃ BE♡MGYU: a soulmate au where you’re born with a tattoo that only matches up with your soulmate !!
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◌ Growing up, there was never a day where you didn’t think of your childhood best friend, Beomgyu
◌ He was always right by your side, picking you up whenever you were down and holding your hand whenever you were afraid
◌ Of course Beomgyu’s actions were because he was a good friend and it was the same for you likewise... but it wasn’t until high school that you realized you had feelings for him
◌ Unfortunately, there was one other problem... your soulmate.
◌ Soulmates had the same birthmark- yours had a heart with two little stars on each side beside it (and it was located on your left rib cage) - and as far as you knew, Beomgyu was persistent not to show you his mark
◌ So even if he had feelings for you in return (which you highly doubted), it was impossible for you to be with him due to your soulmates
◌ Therefore, you decided to keep your feelings to yourself hoping that they would soon go away and for you soulmate to come once they were put away and done with
◌ That, however, was not the easiest. No matter what you did, you always thought of stupid Beomgyu and his stupid laugh with his stupid smile that could basically command you to do anything and you’d do it just for happiness
◌ So what could you do in your hopeless situation? Naturally you decided to confess, even if it meant damaging your friendship; you had to do it for yourself.
◌ As the two of you were walking home together, you pulled Beomgyu aside to sit at one of your favorite places as you were watching the pink and blue sunset together
◌ Somehow you ended up tackling Beomgyu on the grass after he teased you a little bit, and the two of you were like fools in love, just adoring each others’ company together 
◌ Your eyes caught a glimpse of a familiar pattern next to his stomach and you gasped with shock, not realizing that it was the same one you adorned
◌ “Beomgyu, wait... show me your soulmate mark. On your left ribcage.” You asked gently, lifting up your shirt as he did as well. To your surprise, it was the same pattern that you were born with, and you teared up immediately, so happy to know that the love of your life was in fact your actual soulmate
◌ “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe you’re my soulmate... are you sure fate gave me the right person?!” You cried out sarcastically- and he knew that you were kidding by the wide smile on your face
◌ Beomgyu softly smiled at you too, grabbing your hand so he could lay a gentle kiss on it. “Yeah sure, stupid. Why would fate make a mistake like this when it knows that I’ve been in love with you ever since the beginning?”
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ꗃ TAEH♡UN: a soulmate au where you write on your body and your soulmate sees it !!
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◌ Always the artistic child, you were happy to draw everywhere: the white walls of your parents house, homework your first few teachers had given you, and even yourself sometimes
◌ It was stupid things, of course. Maybe some stars and let’s sprinkle some hearts there too! All of your artwork considered with your skin wasn’t as detailed because it was only temporary
◌ You never knew it would have an effect on someone else, so you mindlessly drew over and over again on your arm that was covered by a sweater sleeve hoping that the teacher wouldn’t see
◌ It was a habit you kept up to your high school years, and since you never got a response... well, you assumed you didn’t have a soulmate and you were more than fine with that
◌ “Stop drawing on your arm,” it read, and you furrowed your eyebrows reading the neat handwriting, “I’ve put up with it for years and I’m surprised it still hasn’t stopped!”
◌ You frowned deeply. So you did have a soulmate after all. But you didn’t want this one! He seemed to be so grumpy and mean and you didn’t want the rest of your life to be consumed with that
◌ The following day you wrote back to him, jotting down words of warning since he bothered you so much: no, thank you very much <3 you should’ve said something earlier, jerk!
◌ From then on, the two of you exchanged words daily, and you were pretty fond of talking to him once you got to know him better. It even got to a point where most of your body was covered with words (they only lasted for a day or so before coming off completely) and you’d reread your conversations with a smile on your face over and over again
◌ Actually it was so funny that you had been talking for such a long time that you had completely forgotten to mention your names! So
◌ You guessed you were too concentrated by this soulmate stranger that you had completely abandoned your studies and needed to bring your grade up by help from a tutor
◌ His name was... Kang Taehyun? And he was helping you with your math! You hoped you got the name right and went to the local library where there was an agreement to meet up.
◌ Once you saw him, your eyes immediately glanced at his arms filled with black ink. “Oh, it seems that your soulmate writes a lot to you. It sounds so sweet!” You said with a nostalgic grin, your mind thinking back to your soulmate back... wherever
◌ “Yeah... sometimes she puts some equations to cheat on her math exams- wait, I think she’s failing and needs a tutor now- plus she always uses stars and hearts whenever she’s happy,” he recalled with a raised eyebrow of amusement. 
◌ You followed him until the last detail. Wait, that sounds... awfully familiar... you glanced to look at him with a confused expression. He seemed to catch on right away, taking hold of your hands to put into his
◌ “Y/N, how can you not know it’s me? When we were both in first grade, you would always practice your first and last name on your arm over and over again. That’s how I know you, and I’ve been looking for you ever since.”
◌ His eyes contained so much love for you that you knew that it was true. He was looking for you just as much as you looked for him, and that made you the happiest. 
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ꗃ HUEN♡NG KAI: a soulmate au where you have one eye of your soulmate and they have one of yours !!
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◌ You had always adored how beautiful your parents’ eyes were, ever since you were born
◌ Your mother had a deep, almost too dark to notice kind of purple with an ocean blue that pierced you- a contrast that you had forever loved
◌ Then your father, who also had the same color but with a different eye shape
◌ These eye complimented each other in several ways and every time they looked at each other, it was full of love that you wished to have the exact same feeling one day
◌ Everyone’s eyes were different; it wasn’t like you were just going to have several soulmates. So you knew that one day, since you weren’t born with the same color of eyes, you would meet your one true love as well
◌ All your life you had been patiently waiting for said soulmate to show up, anxiously looking around everywhere for their spontaneous appearance
◌ There wasn’t one day where you didn’t think of that person and how they could complete you in so many ways
◌ Those thoughts got quite consuming sometimes, so you would go into the lavender garden beside your house to keep them in check
◌ As you examined each and every flower, breathing in deeply to calm your nerves, you heard a cough ring out from beside you and you almost fell from the shock of someone spying on you
◌ “Oh, I’m sorry!” The boy said apologetically, and you almost gasped from how smooth his voice sounded- just as calming as the lavender field you were contained in
◌ “Oh, no...” You refused to look at him, desperate for the embarrassment to go away by itself, “it’s okay; I was about to leave anyway.”
◌ The mysterious boy laughed to himself and you swore you felt your heart flutter along with his adorable giggles. “Hey, it’s okay! Just take some lavender from me as an apology gift- this field is supposed to be my father’s anyway.”
◌ Glancing at his hand first which had plucked a fresh lavender plant for you, you bravely decided to look at whoever this stranger was before making a decision
◌ Your heart swelled with love when you finally looked at him. It was your eyes... he had your eyes which meant he was your soulmate! 
◌ “You have pretty eyes,” you shyly noted, staring deep into a reflection of yourself and hoping you didn’t embarrass yourself too much.
◌ He smiled back at you with that same type of shyness, quickly realizing the same thing with a faint, curious wonder. “Not as pretty as yours though.”
◌ And that’s how you met your future children’s father. 
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Released: October 28, 2021 (12:00am)
Thoughts: omg this was like one of the cutest things i had ever written omg :(( i’m like so emo here and it’s literally 11pm on a school night??? i was expecting it to come out on saturday or so when i was free, but luckily i was able to write more this week! thank you so much for requesting this little thing and i hope you enjoy it <3 it made complete sense to me so don’t worry abt that eitherrr 😭 ++ know that i enjoyed writing it too, and your love and support from this request is highly appreciated!
Taglist: @chaoticdreaminisode , @dj-fart , @atinyyylove (if you wanted to be included in my taglist, send an ask or dm! Your support is always greatly appreciated <3)
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illfoandillfie · 3 years ago
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A Different Kind of Education: I Is For Impact Play (Chapter 8)
ADKoE MASTERLIST
Pairing: Professor!Roger Taylor x Fem!Reader
Series Summery:  After being broken up with for not being kinky enough, Reader seeks out her professor to give her some private tutoring so she can win her boyfriend back.
Chapter Summery:   A new week and a new lesson, but also a new challenge. How can you possibly find the courage to talk to your professor about your period?
Warnings: Modern AU, smut (18+), slow burn romance, dom/sub dynamics, dom!roger and sub!reader, professor x student sex, dialogue heavy, conversations about and mentions of menstrual cycles/periods, discussions of impact play including: spanking, kicking, slapping, punching, floggers, paddles, crops, whips, and canes
Words: 10,391
A/N: Better late than never, right? Big apologies for taking so long to get this one up! Once again I've had to split a single topic into multiple chapters lmao. This one is mostly the theory part of the lesson and a bit of an info dump, but the next part will focus more on the actual smut.
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Taglist: @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor @hannafuckingsucks @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely @ilovequeenmorethanyou @johndeaconshands @borhapbois @stardust-galaxies @cherries-n-rocknroll @rogersslave @scorpiogemini 
@80s-roger @libsterslobsters @okilover02 @cjand10 @dealorgirl32 @youngpastafanmug @onceuponadetectivedemigod​
You knew it was something you’d have to deal with eventually, that having your period would affect your lessons with Roger. But still you felt reluctant to broach the topic with him. It wasn’t something you generally discussed with people, especially not your professor (even if you were regularly sleeping with him). And you could already hear the lecture he’d give you about why you shouldn’t be embarrassed to tell your sexual partner about your cycle, and about how he’d taught reproduction enough to not be phased by it. The problem was you weren’t really sure how you felt about having sex during it and you knew even less about whether Roger would want to. You were definitely going to have to talk to him about it, no matter how much you didn’t want to. So, wondering when the best time to bring it up would be, you checked the curriculum he’d written for you. Impact play. That was the topic for the week. Roger might consider you clueless about kink (as you’d learnt during the previous week’s munch), but you at least knew enough to know that impact play meant spanking. For a moment you were distracted from your worries about the conversation you were going to have, rather excited by what you’d just read. Spanking was one of those things you’d been expecting to try. When you thought about BDSM, spanking was the second thing to come to mind after bondage. It was one of those things Dylan had hinted at being into. A couple of times during sex he’d given your arse a slap and, though you’d never really asked for it you also hadn’t told him to stop. He never hit too hard and it added a bit of excitement so there was no harm in it. And you suspected he might be interested in pushing it further if you ever suggested as much. So, to know that Roger was going to run you through the basics of it and show you how it felt, you couldn’t help but be a bit excited. And maybe you’d be able to keep things over the clothes to start and you wouldn’t have to tell Roger about your period after all. The good thing with having an implant was that it reduced the duration of your period. It would have been nice if it stopped it entirely but at least it shortened it and made it a little lighter. So maybe you could organise a second session later in the week for the more hands on part of the lesson, and not have to explain at all. You left your apartment feeling happier and excited to see Roger that night. But you didn’t have to wait so long to see him.  
You’d barely taken two steps inside when a familiar voice called out Ms Y/L/N and you found Roger walking towards you, his hand raised in a lazy wave.  “Hi Professor,” you smiled, surprised but happy to see him, “I’m just on my way to class, what’s up?”  “Oh, in that case,” he glanced over to a group of students ambling past you, “do you have time for a meeting before you leave this afternoon?”  Your heart rate sped up at the serious way he looked at you over his glasses, “Umm sure.”  “Good. I’ll see you this afternoon then. Don’t forget.”  You nodded but a new worry had taken over your mind. There was only one reason he could want to talk to you. Your degree. If it was anything to do with his tutoring sessions then he would have just said it when you got to his place that evening. No, it must be to do with your class work. Maybe something had been wrong with your last exam? Possibilities were turning over in your mind as you resumed your path to your first class, each worse than the other. Maybe you’d misunderstood a question and gotten it completely wrong. Maybe he’d had to fail you. Maybe your overall grade had dropped. Maybe he was going to call the whole tutoring thing off because you’d gotten too distracted and done so badly on your recent assessment. You spent the entire day trying not to get too worked up about it, trying to tell yourself that if your work had slipped even a little he would have called to talk about it earlier, that if it really was as bad as failing his subject you’d have discussed it long before now. By the time your last class of the day ended you were somewhere between terrified about what Roger was going to say and relieved that you were about to find out.  
Your hand was shaking as you knocked on Roger’s office door and pushed it open at his word.   “AH, Ms Y/L/N, shut the door please and take a seat.” he said, shifting a stack of papers to the side of his desk. It was only once you were sitting that he seemed to look at you properly, “Are you alright? You look a bit pale.”  “Professor I’m so sorry, I swear if something was wrong with my last exam then it wasn’t because of our lessons and I promise I’m not letting them distract me at all. I put so much time and effort into studying and if-”  “Woah, woah, hang on. No one said anything was wrong.”  Your breath caught in your throat and it seemed to take you twice as long as it normally would for you to understand what he’d said, “There’s not? Then....why am I here?”  “It’s about tonight’s tutoring session.”  “Oh?”  “I wondered if you’d be okay making a small change to the plan.”  “S-so nothing's wrong with my work?”  Roger shook his head, “Your work is impeccable Ms Y/L/N. Sorry, I didn’t realise you’d assume the worst. I had no intention of worrying you like that. I was intending to mention it this morning but you seemed to be in a bit of a rush and I didn’t want anyone to overhear so...” he gestured vaguely towards you with his hands.   You let out a relieved chuckle, feeling a weight lift from your shoulders, “What was the change you wanted to make?”  “Do you know what we’ll be focusing on this week?”  “Impact play, Professor.”  “Very good. And do you know what that entails?”  “It’s like spanking isn’t it?”  “Spanking is definitely part of it, yes.”  “Cool. But you’re not wanting to switch topic are you? Only I’ve been kind of looking forward to this one since it’s like proper BDSM stuff....or like, not that other things aren’t I just mean that spanking is part of what I initially imagined, y’know?”  Roger held up his hand to quiet you, “I understand what you mean Ms Y/L/N. And it’s not that I want to change the topic, I just wanted to change where the lesson would take place.”  “Okay...” you were a little surprised by that. Where else could he have in mind when your lessons were supposed to be secret.  “I thought we might have the first lesson here.”  “Here?!”  “Keep your voice down, Ms Y/L/N. Not here exactly, not this office. In the first-year bio room actually.”  “Why? Isn’t that kind of risky? What if someone saw?”  Roger shrugged one shoulder, “It might be, but I think what I intend to show you could be covered as a biological experiment. Let me explain,” he said upon seeing your confused face, “So, as you no doubt remember, first years do a lot of dissection of various animals, working their way up to human.”  You nodded, remembering hours spent bent over various carcases and cadavers.  “Well, I thought it might be beneficial to show you some of the impact play tools we can use, demonstrating how they work and what effects they can have, but I don’t want to demonstrate them on you straight away. Luckily, it just so happens that one of the animals my first years are studying right now is pigs, so I thought we might use a pig carcass instead. Pig and human flesh are quite similar so you should get a decent sense of how being spanked with various tools will look and the impact they would have on your skin. We can compare being spanked by hand to flogging to a crop and so on. All without experiencing any pain at all. Of course, it is a dead pig so it won’t be exactly the same and you probably won’t see the same levels of bruising you would on a living human being, but it’s a good starting point. Plus this way you could try wielding the tools too, so you can get a sense for how they feel to use them and how much force is required to make them work.”  You were taken aback by the explanation and had to stop your jaw from falling open as you listened. But Roger waited patiently for you to think it over and you quickly concluded it was a good plan. You could easily write it off as related to your dissertation if anyone saw and asked what was going on. It wasn’t at all related but Roger was about the only person who knew what topic you were researching so no one else would pick up the lie.   “Okay then, let’s have the lesson here.”  “Excellent. You really don’t mind hanging back?”  “Not at all.”  “Good. I think we should possibly wait until a little later before we start, just to let the place clear out a bit. Perhaps we could get some dinner and eat it in here before we head down to the room. You can tell me how you’re getting on with your dissertation.”  “Okay, I like that idea.”  “Shall I duck out and get us some food then? What would you like?” 
After what could only be described as a minor argument about the merits of Mexican food, you and Roger eventually settled on a nearby Greek place. He tapped the order into Uber Eats and then went to wait for the delivery out on the street so the driver wouldn’t have to find their way through the numerous carparks and laneways on campus. You ducked out to your own car to drop off your bag full of books, though you kept your laptop to make notes on. It would also make your story seem more legitimate if anyone did stumble onto the lesson and ask what was going on. The thought of the lesson made you smile. Partly because you were keen to learn about the topic but also partly because you knew there was no way sex would be part of it. Roger would definitely draw the line at fucking his student in his classroom where anyone could catch you. And if you were going to be spanking a dead pig then you wouldn’t be asked to remove clothes or anything like that. So you wouldn’t have to discuss your menstrual cycle with Roger at all. You’d just say you were busy until later in the week when your period stopped and organise the follow-up lesson then and Roger wouldn’t be any the wiser. It was perfect. That, in addition to knowing nothing was wrong with your actual schoolwork, put you in a very good mood and you could have whistled with joy as you made your way back to Roger’s office.  
By the time you’d finished eating, the sky outside the window had changed from a mix of warm pinks and yellows as the sun set and was gradually darkening the longer you watched. It was only when Roger glanced at his watch and saw that it was a quarter to seven that he decided the building would be empty enough for your lesson to start. He grabbed his own laptop as you grabbed yours and then led you along the corridor and down a set of stairs, taking you towards the back of the building where the hands-on biology lessons were held.   Roger made sure the door was shut and locked before dumping his belongings onto a desk. “Can you give me a hand?” he asked, before moving to the door to a walk-in freezer at the back of the room.  Together you hoisted a large pig carcass onto a cart and wheeled it out into the main room.   Roger then ducked back into the freezer returning, after a little rummaging, with what looked to be a child’s toy crate. It was made of yellow plastic and seemed light enough that Roger had no trouble hoisting it onto one of the desks, but it was not full of children’s toys. You couldn’t see everything immediately but poking out of the top was a long black handle with a leather flap hanging off the end.   “Is that what we’ll be using then?” You were eyeing the box warily.  “Yup,” Roger began pulling the items from the box one by one, laying them out on the desk, “I brought the box in earlier and hid it down here so no one would stumble onto it. I didn’t want any awkward questions. Or to have any of them stolen since they’re mine,” he added with a chuckle.  You looked over the collection with interest, some of the objects familiar to you and some only vaguely recognisable, “Is that a hair brush?”  “It is,” Roger winked playfully, “Kink can be very D.I.Y and the back of a hairbrush makes for a good makeshift paddle. The front of the hairbrush can be fun too actually. Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself. I’m going to go through everything individually, explain what they are and what sort of effect they have and I’ll demonstrate them on our piggy participant. There’s also a few things I don’t have which we can run through at the end, sound good?”  “Sounds great.” You sank into one of the nearby seats, pulling your laptop towards you, ready to take notes.   “Right well. Impact play is a BDSM practice where one partner strikes another for sexual gratification. As you rightly said earlier this includes spanking but there's a little more to it than just that. You can slap your partner, punch them, kick them, whip them or flog them. There’re numerous ways to play with impact and as with all BDSM it’s important to negotiate what you want before you start. Being struck can leave marks of course. Brusies, welts, scratches, right through to cuts that draw blood. For some people, the marking aspect is an important part of their enjoyment, and they might go so far as to intentionally make the marks more apparent. But whether or not you want visible marks might be influenced by your job or the season or your social life or any number of other things. Personally, the marks are secondary to why I enjoy the forms of impact play I partake in. But my feelings aside, the nature of our lessons and the secrecy required, means I won’t intentionally be marking you anywhere that isn’t easy to cover up. If you even want to try it out. You might see everything today and decide it’s not for you and that would be okay.”  “I don’t think there’s much danger of that Roger. Dylan’s spanked me a little before and I’m interested enough to try more.”  “In that case then, you should know that physical pain is part of impact play no matter what aspect you try. And it can bring up more mental pain too, depending on the individual. Which is why I want to start with testing some implements on this pig. We can go through a few things and you’ll get a sense of them and then we can talk about what you might actually want to try or if any of it seems wrong for you. I’m also going to be much more diligent with your safe word in these lessons than any before. So what is your safe word?”  “Pizazz, Roger,”  “Good. Remember you can use it whenever you need to, even today. If things get too much for you I want to know.”  “I know. I promise I’ll use it.” You were struck by how serious Roger’s tone was but understood it, after the conversation you’d had during your previous lesson. And, for the first time, you wondered if this would be a topic Roger would find hard to teach.  “Thank you. I’ll check in with you every so often, especially when we move onto the practical lesson and you’re experiencing it firsthand. So, if I ask you what your safe word is, I need you to respond as loudly and as quickly as you can. It’s a way for me to gauge how well you’re coping and to make sure you’re still capable of using it.”  “That makes sense.”  Having assured himself of your understanding, Roger took a deep breath and smiled again, “Well, I have a range of different implements you can use here today but we’ll start with the most basic,” he held his two hands in front of him, palms towards you, fingers wiggling, “Hands.”  You smiled at his showmanship but your gaze lingered on the offered view. His hands had always seemed quite lovely, even when he was just teaching you biology. The way they moved so delicately as he demonstrated necessary scientific processes for the class, or rapidly twirled pens around his fingers to impress new students. Of course, you’d felt them too since you’re first private lesson, the way he caressed you and held you. His fist tightening in your hair and his fingers plunging into you and making you moan and the way he’d gently stroke your skin as you were both regaining your breath. You were excited to feel the power in them as he spanked you.   “Spanking is entry level impact play. Everyone and their mother has heard of it. It’s a common thing to see in pornography and even in Hollywood movies when they want to show sex as kinky. And because you don’t need more than your hands it’s easy to experiment with. Do you want to see what it looks like?”  You nodded and Roger stepped closer to the pig, angling himself so you could see.   Suddenly there was the sound of a clap as Roger’s palm hit the pig’s flesh.   “See how my hand was open and my palm was flat?” Roger demonstrated again but slower so the hit barely made a sound, “But what if I do this?” He hit the pig again but changed the position of his hand. The sound of his hand colliding with the pig was deeper the second time around, “If you cup your hand, curve it slightly, you can change the way the spank feels and sounds. Just like clapping.”  You experimentally clapped your hands together, first with open palms and then with each hand cupped so that the fingers wrapped around the back of the other.  “Now you give the pig a try.”  Feeling a surge of nervously excited butterflies, you got out of your seat and took your place at the pig. With a breath and a swallow you quickly brought your hand down. The slapping sound seemed to echo in the quiet room but it wasn’t as crisp as the noise Roger’s hits had made. With a look to Roger for permission, you tried it again, creating a slightly more impressive sound.  “Good, now cupped?”  You did it again, curving your fingers in a bit and bringing it down again. It felt more awkward than the open palm hit had so you repositioned yourself to hit the pig from a slightly different angle and tried once more.  “Don’t be afraid to pull your arm back further. The more your rear back, the more force will be in the spank. Like this,” he pulled his hand back past his ear and swung down hard, the spank echoing around you. “Of course, you can also spank from a nearer point too. Spanking, and a lot of impact play, is best if you mix it up a bit, don’t stay in one rhythm too long, do some spanks with your fingers spread, or change how hard or fast they are. I might give a sub two or three hard hits each with a pause between but then I’ll switch to a more rapid series of spanks that don’t have as much force behind them but come faster.”  You nodded and experimented with taking your arm back further, testing out ways to change the strength of each spank, until Roger finally called you to stop.  “How did that feel?” he asked as you took your seat again.  “My hand tingles.”  “That’s normal,” Roger laughed, “in fact it’s one thing I really enjoy about spanking by hand. The sub isn’t the only one who feels the spanks, the dom gets some of the pain in his hand too, especially if the intensity ramps up or there's a section of quick-fire spanks. And that can a) help the dom understand what the sub is feeling and work out how long the scene should go and b) brings a sort of intimacy to the scene that is harder to achieve with a tool.”  You hummed as you noted down what he’d said, “Have you ever spanked someone so much you injured your wrist or anything?”  “No.” Roger shook his head, amused by the question, “My wrists are pretty sturdy. But a few times I’ve been left with a stingy, tingly hand for an hour or two. Which brings me to an important note about pain. There are two main types of pain you can experience in impact play. We refer to them as thuddy and stingy.”  “Thuddy and stingy? What is this, an afternoon kids show?”  Roger rolled his eyes, “The names are simple but they explain exactly what they mean. Some types of impact will have a stingy sensation which is usually superficial. It won’t go deeper than the first few layers of skin and probably leaves the skin feeling warm and a little tingly or like sunburn, y’know? It’s typical of spanks and slaps. Thuddy pain is deeper, it gets into the fat and muscles and tissue and aches more. And I’ll go through which tools cause which sort of pain as I get to them. Generally though, people who enjoy impact play have a preference for one or the other.”  “And your preference is what?”  “Thuddy. Definitely. Although I prefer inflicting stingy.”  You hummed thoughtfully.  “Now, I’ll go into details about ways to actually incorporate spanking into a scene later. We can talk about it while we’re negotiating our scene. Today is just about the practicalities and sensations involved in the different types of impact play. So are you okay to move on?”  “Yup, definitely.” And then, sensing Roger might ask, you added, “Pizazz.” feeling pleased when you saw him smile. 
“I don’t expect us to delve too deep into them but I think I should touch on kicking, punching and slapping. Kicking and punching are things I’ve not done. They can, obviously, be quite painful. But they’re pretty self-explanatory. From what I understand about it, and what I’ve heard others who enjoy that kind of thing say, kicking and punching can both be very intimate, similar to the way spanking by hand is, but in a more primal or animalistic way. Punching is, of course, done without any accessories but kicking often includes footwear of some kind. A lot of time it’s something like a steel-toed boot or something with a bit of weight to it.”  “That isn't something I want to try.” You’d learnt a lot about how far kink went so weren’t completely shocked that some people would enjoy something as forceful as kicking, but it did take you by surprise to hear Roger talking about it.  “What about slapping?”  “How is that different to spanking?”  “Well, you’re right, they are similar. But slapping generally refers to slapping on the face whereas spanking is usually on the, uh, derriere. Of course you can slap or spank other parts too. For clarity’s sake, if I say slapping assume I mean on the face whereas spanking is anywhere else on the body.”  You thought about it for a second, “I’m not sure if I’d be game to try it but I do want to know more.”  “Slapping can be fun. Again, it’s not one I do a lot but I have played with it in the past. It comes in handy for particular scenes and there’s a fairly bratty sub I’ve worked with who responds really well to it. The most important thing to know is that if you are slapping someone’s face only ever aim for the cheeks. There’s a lot of fragile places around the face and it’s close to the brain so you need to be careful not to do any lasting damage. Never hit the temples because you hit them with enough force and it can kill a person. Nose and ears are off limits too, anything that is important.  You knew enough about biology to know Roger wasn’t making those rules up for fun. Noses were easy to break and hitting an ear too hard could damage someone’s hearing. But face slapping did still intrigue you. 
“Well, I’d say the next – let's call it the next level – of impact play is paddling.” He picked up what looked to be a wooden plank with a handle. It was an inch or two longer and wider than his hand with small holes cut out in a repeating pattern over the flat side so you could look right through it. “They don’t always look like this. Paddles come in lots of different shapes and sizes. This is a wooden one but they’re also frequently made of leather and sometimes the leather ones will have one side that’s a little more padded than the other. That gives you a bit of versatility with the pain. You can start off lightly with the padded side to get you in the zone and then during the scene switch it to the firmer side that hurts more. Or, if you don’t have access to a paddle at all, you can substitute a hairbrush.” He picked the hairbrush up and waved it back and forth.  “And that-” you pointed at the hair brush, “will feel the same as that?” you pointed at the wooden paddle, not quite able to reconcile the two in your mind.   “Not exactly the same but close. Honestly you can get really creative with impact play and not spend any money to get nearly the same results. I mean a plastic hairbrush might take a few extra hits or a little more force to really bruise someone but they’ll still end up sore from it. Or, if the hairbrush doesn’t do it for you, dig through your draws and see what else you can find. Wooden spoons, cutting boards, rulers, leather belts, spatulas, rolling pins, ping pong paddles, anything you can get your hands on. Just be mindful of how easily they’d break or them causing more pain than you expect.”  Again, you weren’t necessarily surprised by the lengths people would go to for sexual gratification, as Roger had put it, but it was a bit astounding. Still, you noted it all down just in case.   “Now a paddle generally falls under the stingy category but you do tend to get a deeper bruise than with your hand. Different factors could alter the way it feels too. If you put less force into it the pain will fall more on the thuddy side, same goes for if your hits are slower. But the pain call also be influenced by the size of the paddle, the material it’s made out of, the texture of it.”  “Texture?”  “Sometimes paddles have added texture, so they aren’t just a smooth, flat board. They might have metal studs that are more raised than the surface of the blade – the part you hit with – or ridging that will imprint the skin. This one has holes in it which definitely changes the feeling, makes it more intense. As you strike and the blade hits, the holes do two things. They stop any air cushions forming that would lessen the impact and they sort of push the skin into the holes which means the pain isn't completely even along where was hit. Plus it also leaves these cool circle marks behind which is fun.”  You realised you’d held your breath through the explanation, eyes following the paddle as Roger waved it through the air and ran his hands over it unconsciously. You hoped he had something more beginner friendly at home, though you couldn’t pretend you weren’t turned on by the way he wielded his weapon.  “Using it is quite similar to spanking but your hand isn’t hitting, it’s holding onto the paddle handle. So you just pull back,” Roger’s arm went back and the paddle swung backwards,” and then hit,” he swung his arm forward, the paddle cutting through the air and landing directly against the soft flesh of the pig. It made a satisfying thwack sound on impact and when Roger’ brought it back again you could see the circular patterns he’d talked about.   He demonstrated a few more times before he handed the plank to you.   It was heavier than you’d been expecting, solid wood, but the handle fit into your palm comfortably. You ran your hands over the flat part, what Roger had called the blade, and felt the holes with your fingers. The weight made it a little hard to swing but not impossible. You managed to mark the pig as well, stroking the circular imprints with your fingers.  “Try the hairbrush,” Roger said, swapping it for the paddle.  Its handle wasn’t quiet as long, but it was lighter and you found your hits were harder with it, without you even trying.   “Something to be aware of if you use an ordinary household item, or even just a different sort of impact toy. Because it’s lighter you can pull it back further and swing harder. A dom has to be aware of how much is going into each hit and how much their sub can handle.” 
“So what’s after paddles?”  “Floggers.” Roger picked his up off the table, “This is a fairly typical flogger. As you can see it’s made of black leather. It has the handle which is the thickest part and then a number of smaller tails. The tails is where you get the most variation which can be a stylistic choice or just a side effect of its price and overall quality. There’s a trick for knowing if a flogger is good quality or not. It should be pretty evenly balanced between the handle and the tails, so you should be able to do this,” he held out a finger and balanced the flogger on it carefully, the handle pointing out one way and the tails dangling over the other.   You thought for sure it would tip forward onto the tails and tumble to the ground but it hung there perfectly.  “Sometimes there will be more tails or they'll look different but no matter what, it should be balanced.” Roger gave a practiced flick of his hand so the flogger leapt into the air and he was able to catch the handle before it fell. “From a more stylistic point of view, you could get a flogger with less tails but they’ll be made of braids of leather which makes them heavier and thicker. Braided tails are also likely to have knots in the ends which can be a bit scratchy and even draw blood. They don’t have to be made of leather either. Rubber floggers are also popular. The tails on them tend to be more rectangular in shape, still flat but they have more edges and it actually feels like you’re being hit with more tails then there really are. And if you’re looking to really fuck someone up you can get hemp floggers. Sometimes they’ll look similar to this leather one but hemp is fairly stiff material and sometimes the tails will be shaped so that they’re sort of squiggly rather than flat lines. The squiggles hurt like a bitch, especially if they have knots at the end. Definitely start off with simple leather and work up once you’re more experienced.” Roger dragged the ends of the tails over his hand as he spoke, “I’d say this falls into the more thuddy type of pain. It can cover a large area of your body since the tails spread out and each of them creates an individual pain point. And because you’re being hit six or seven or nine or however many times at once, you can build up quite a rapid movement over a short period of time.”  You eyed the dancing tails as Roger moved his hand through them, “How long are the tails? Isn’t it a bit dangerous to have so many bits flying in all directions?”  Roger laughed, “Well yeah, kinda. I mean, that’s BDSM for you though, it gets dangerous which is why we’re all obsessed with safety. It’s a good thing to have noticed though, well done. The tails on this one are on the shorter side but some floggers will have much longer ones which means the dom can stand further back and still inflict a lot of pain. But you’re right, you do have to be mindful of the length and where they’re flying because a longer tail can potentially wrap around to somewhere you aren’t intending to hit. For instance, if you’re standing behind a person and flogging the back of their shoulder, you don’t want one of the tails to fly past their shoulder and around their neck. That would be incredibly painful and probably not what they expected or wanted from the scene.”  “So you have to take into account the length of the tails when you’re negotiating the scene then? And know where on the body to focus the hits so you don’t risk causing the wrong sort of pain and ending it early.”  “Exactly. That’s why negotiating the scene is important. Then both the dom and the sub will know what they want to achieve, what they want to get out of the experience, and they can tailor things to fit better. A lot of doms who are into impact play are likely to have multiple versions of their favourite toys – I myself have a few different paddles at home, I just didn’t bring them all in with me today – so by talking through what you want they’ll be able to choose the style of toy that will best fit the scene.”  “So how do you use a flogger then? Is it the same as spanking and paddling where you just swing your arm forward?”  “Sort of. Floggers have a few different ways to use them. There is of course the single strike option where, yeah, you do just hit them like you would with a paddle. I find that you don’t need to bring your arm back so far though, the movement comes from your elbow more than your shoulder.” Roger bent his arm so his hand and the flogger were roughly head height and then brought it down on the pig, “And you can change the angle of your single strike so that you hit them overhand or underhand or from one of the sides.” He demonstrated each direction as he said them, first bringing the flogger down from above, then swinging it up from below, then from the right side and finally a backhanded hit from the left. “But you don’t have to just pick a side to hit from. Paddles and hands are limited in how you can swing them but floggers have more movement. One way to use them is to swing them in a circle.” He moved back towards the pig to demonstrate, standing side on so that the tails whipped around and struck the pig, “I like starting off with circles because you can keep the pressure quite light. The tails sort of brush over the sub as they pass and it can be a good way to slowly build up. And then you can move into a figure eight as you get a bit harder.” Roger shifted his circles so they made a sideways eight in the air, subtly adjusting his stance so that the tail swished over the pig’s skin on both the forward and back motion.   You watched, awe-struck by how easily Roger swung the flogger, falling into a rhythm quickly. It wasn’t hard to imagine how he’d suddenly change the speed or the force of the swing when you were least expecting it.  
You were brought back to the present by Roger clearing his throat as he stilled the flogger, “The figure eight is why you should practice your backhand swing as much as any other. Because the tails will hit the sub on both the forward and back swings and you want them to be as even as possible.” He flipped the flogger in his hands, holding the handle out to you.   It felt smooth and cool in your hand, lighter than the paddle had been. You swished it experimentally, trying to get a sense of how it felt in motion.”  “Show me your overhand hit.” Roger said, leaning back against the nearest desk to watch.   You tried to imitate how he’d swung it, elbow bent, flogger raised.   It must have been good enough because Roger nodded and said, “how about underhand?”  He kept calling out different directions for a while, testing your reactions but you felt it helped you get a better grip on the toy and you found yourself adjusting how you held it so your movements became more fluid.   Roger watched you as you tried to keep up, his eyes locked onto your hands. Had you been looking, you might have caught sight of him subtly adjusting himself in his pants.   Finally, he seemed satisfied that you could successfully single strike from any direction and asked you to try the circle and figure eight motions.  They were harder to start, more awkward as you tried to work out the best way to move the flogger, and you caught Roger chuckling.”  “Oi, stop laughing,”  “Do you want some help?” he was still smiling but his request was genuine and when you nodded he stepped towards you. One of his hands moved to your waist as the other lay over yours on the handle of the flogger.  You tried not to grin too much as he did exactly why you’d hoped, and you felt him so close behind you.  “Like this,” His arm gently directed yours, the flogger beginning to move in a smooth circle.   “Oh, not so hard then,” you laughed, half turning to face him, “Y’know if someone walked in now this would be pretty hard to explain.”  His eyes darted to your lips, “Good thing we locked the door then.”  You hummed, waiting to see if Roger would close the gap.  He did a few seconds later, leaning in to kiss you softly. But the movement caused you both to forget about the flogger, your hands falling out of rhythm, and the tails whacking against your outstretched arms as they fell.   “Ow,” you both groaned, Roger stepping away from you.  It was disappointing but the disappointment was a little confusing. Surely you weren’t hoping for your professor to kiss you when you had no intention of sleeping with him that night.   Roger laughed, “Maybe that’s enough of the flogger today.”  “Might be for the best. Good thing I was so bad at it, otherwise we might have been really hurt.”  “You weren’t that bad. You actually looked good with it before I brought in the circles. Quite sexy really.”  “Thanks,” you said softly, trying to hide how pleased you were at that praise, “What else is there then?” 
“There's only one more that I can demonstrate but then there’s a few others I’ll touch on quickly too. So the last one I own is a crop.” He picked it up off the table, his fingers sliding along the length of it’s handle as he spoke, “This one I would put in the stingy category. It’s fast and sharp. Again, you can get crops in a few different styles. They will all have a handle like this, long and thin and probably with a slightly thicker point towards the end that’s easy to hold onto. The difference will be in the bit you hit with. This one is based on the sort of riding crop that's used on horses, so it’s quite plain. There’s just this loop of leather which hangs off the end. But others can be more decorative. I’ve seen crops which had ends shaped like hearts or that had studs pushed into them. Some of them are padded and some have a more rounded shape. We like our variety.”  “It looks scarier than the others I think,”  “Yeah, they’re quite intimidating aren’t they. And if you do it right, it’ll make a noise through the air, which just adds to how intimidating it can be.”  “Can you show me how to swing it now?”  “Absolutely. Now, you want to stand a bit further back with a crop because there is such a long handle. And the magic is in the wrist with these. You just flick the wrist and...”  You could hear the whooshing sound of it flying through the air before it cracked against the pig.  “Now some crops are more bendy and some are more stiff so, if you get one, you’ll want to practice swinging it a bit before you use it on a person, to get a feel for it. The flexibility of it might dictate how you stand or how strong the swing has to be. Give this one a go though.”  You felt oddly powerful as you took the crop and tightened your fist around the end. For a moment a vision of you decked out in leather dominatrix gear popped into your head and you nearly laughed. Unfortunately, the intimidating whooshing noise Roger had achieved was not as easy for you to make as you’d hoped, and the imagined power soon dissipated as you struggled to make the weapon sing.   Roger however was not disappointed. “It takes practice,” was what he said when you lamented your inability to create the sound, “And you don’t have to have the sound to make a good hit. It’s just kind of cool.”  When you still seemed disappointed he sighed.  “If it’s any help, I can’t always make the sound either. And besides, I wasn’t intending to use that one on you, unless you really, really want to. I mostly brought it to show you as an interesting part of your theory lessons. And so you’d have a sense of what a cane is like, even though I don’t have any of them to demonstrate.”  “A cane? Like....caning? Like what Victorian kids used to have done if they misbehaved or whatever?”  Roger laughed, “Kind of, yeah. It does have a history in corporal punishment. Which, might I add, wasn’t just for Victorian kids. It was still a thing when I was a kid. We didn’t get caned, more likely to be whacked over the knuckles with a ruler, but still. I don’t think it really left schools until the 80s.”  “Jesus,”  “Yeah. Occasionally I do wish I could bring out a ruler to shut a kid up,” he winked in jest, “Anyway, caning for BDSM is similar and uses the same sort of tool. A cane, funnily enough. Canes are long and thin like a crop but without the leather flap at the end or the more padded handle area. Traditionally they’re made from rattan which is a type of plant, but you can also get synthetic canes which are covered in leather. In my experience synthetic canes are actually harder. Not to use, I mean in the way they feel when you’re hit with them. The traditional rattan ones require a lot of maintenance though. You have to water them between uses, literally soaking them in a bath of water so they don’t dry out and break. But the benefit with a rattan cane is that if you get it home and realise you’d like something a bit shorter, you can cut it off yourself and just sandpaper down the rough edge and it’s good as new.”  “So are there any different version aside from synthetic? All the other toys had lots of variety.”  “Hmmm, not really. Most of the difference will be in how thick the cane is, which can effect the feel of it a lot. A thinner cane will sting when it hits and the force will make the skin hug the cane so it leaves these long marks behind. A thicker cane though might sting less but it’ll still hurt a lot, just more thuddy. And you tend to get more bruising from the thicker ones.”  “And do you use it the same as a crop?”  “Mostly, yes. The biggest difference is that you can use a larger section of a cane. The crop has the specific bit at the end to hit with whereas a cane doesn’t have that limit. The most important thing to remember is to try and aim a little short of where you want to hit because if you hit with a part of the cane six inches down, those top six inches are going to hit as well, and with force behind them they will wrap around the person’s side or arse or whatever until they make contact. But other than that, it’s a similar motion from the wrist and uses a similar amount of energy. And canes can make the cool whippy noise too.” 
“Is that everything then?”  “One last one, really quick. Whips.”  “Oh yeah, I’ve heard of whipping in kink.”  “Yeah, it’s one of those things that gets mentioned a lot even if comparatively fewer people are actually into it. But everyone’s heard the phrase chains and whips in relation to BDSM. There's a few different varieties of whips but I don’t really know enough about them to know the difference. They all look like whips to me. Very cowboy. But they’re one of the more intense versions of impact play. The pain they cause is quite sharp and stingy and will be very localised to a specific point because they have the one tail, as opposed to floggers which have multiple tails. Whips are very capable of breaking the skin though and feel very intensely painful. I do not recommend them unless you discover you’re a masochist and you’ve tried everything else impact play has to offer.”  “No need to tell me twice, Professor. Definitely do not want to try whips any time soon.”  “That’s very reasonable. And that is all of the impact play options I wanted to go through. There’s a little more to cover regarding safety before I let you go for the night, but how about we put the pig away and hope no one notices it’s been marked by crops and floggers.”  You chuckled and quickly moved to help Roger push the trolley back towards the freezer, locking the dead pig away securely, and to help pack up his toys.  When everything was tidy again you re-took your seat, Roger taking the one beside you. It made the end of the lesson feel less like a lesson and more of just a casual chat, the topic of which happened to be BDSM.   “The most important thing to remember when trying impact play is which parts of the body are safest to hit.” He paused for a moment, considering you, “But you’ve been studying biology for a while now, Ms Y/L/N. Care to guess which parts are safe and which parts you should avoid?”  You hadn’t expected to be asked so took a moment to consider your answer, “Well, the arse obviously. Ummm.... I guess I’d assume the best places to hit are the bits with more meat on them.”  “Very good. Entirely correct. There’s a reason most people think about spanking on the arse and that’s because it’s one of the best places to spank. Well, that and the fact that spanking is used so frequently in punishment scenes where you bend the naughty girl over your knee. But, yes, hitting the arse is good. Hitting the thighs can also be good, though the bit just under the arse cheek where it connects to the thighs hurts a lot. Which isn’t to say don’t ever spank there, just be mindful that it’s going to hurt more than directly on the arse cheeks. The pecks or breasts can be good places to hit, even the upper back where the shoulder blade is can be good. What about places to avoid hitting? Any ideas what those might be?”  You hummed in thought, “I’d imagine you wouldn’t want to hit the spine since it’s so important.”  “Right again Ms Y/L/N. The spine is definitely something to avoid. I don’t like hitting on the back much at all because there's too much important stuff there but I do know some others who don’t mind using a flogger there, especially while warming up before things get too intense. There are also the kidneys to watch out for,” he moved his hand to press against the spot on his own back, “because, as you no doubt know, part of the kidneys stick out under the ribcage so aren’t fully protected. Then a little lower down, just above the arse, is the tailbone which should also be avoided.   “What about the neck? That would be bad to hit too, right?”  “Yup. And that’s something to watch for if you’re doing anything on the shoulder blades. The spine of course runs all the way up the back of the neck and hitting there can do some very serious and lasting damage if you’re not careful. I know some people who will only flog the shoulder blades if the sub is wearing a collar because that adds a bit of protection around the C5 and C6 vertebrae but even so, better safe than sorry in my opinion. The front of the neck is also not good to hit since that’s where the vocal cords and all that is.”  “Which is why you have to be careful with a flogger’s tails, right?”  “Right. But what about on the front? Is there anywhere else you’d avoid?”  “Pussy,” you said with a laugh.  Roger laughed too, “Actually, depending on how it’s done, spanking a pussy can be quite enjoyable.”  “Wait really?”  “Yeah. I prefer doing it with my hand since you can feel when it makes the sub wet but it’s not totally unusual to use paddles or crops or even floggers down there too. I’m sure some people whip as well.”  You gulped at the thought.  “The biggest area to avoid on a person’s front side is the diaphragm and middle of the chest. There’s a lot of important stuff in there and a lot less tissue than elsewhere.”  “Do people get badly hurt doing impact play?” you glanced over the list of places Roger said to avoid. It made it seem like almost any spanking was running the risk of more than just some bad bruising.   “Sometimes.” Roger said seriously. He paused for a moment, thinking, and then continued, “Things can go wrong. And when you’re playing with intentionally hurting someone, things going wrong can be very serious. I won’t pretend there aren’t stories of people trying impact play and ending up paralysed or worse. But if you’re careful, if you pay attention and only hit certain areas and are mindful of how hard you’re hitting, then you’re going to be fine. And that’s why we come up with safe words and talk through scenes before we do them. So that you can minimize those risks and have a chance to communicate any worries or concerns.”  “But how can safe words help if you say them after you’ve already been hurt too much?”  “Well, for one, even if you’ve been hurt badly, using your safe word can stop things from being made worse. But you don’t have to wait until you’re hurt to use the safe word. Yes, if I spank you four times in a row and the fourth one feels so bad you can’t go on, then you should use your safe word before I give you a fifth. But you could also use it after the third hit when you aren’t sure if you want the fourth. And safe words aren’t just about physical pain. If you start off excited but then feel anxious after two hits you are well within your rights to safe word. You don’t have to wait until the damage is done. And, obviously, it’s not always easy to tell if that one hit more is going to be enough to make you want to stop. You can’t always know if the next hit is going to catch your neck wrong and do serious damage. But if you feel at all worried that it might, speak up. Not just worried either. If you feel distracted or you think I’m not paying enough attention to how I’m spanking you, or if I move to spank and area you don’t want me to touch, tell me. There is no wrong reason to use a safe word, even if we’re only a few minutes into the scene. I’ve said before that I’d rather you tell me to stop than for us to go on and you not feel comfortable, and I mean it.”  “I know, I guess I just never really thought about it being for mental stuff as well as physical.”  “Mmm, I should have checked that.”  “Well, let’s face it, you probably tried and I just didn’t pay attention. But, y’know, you’re very good at reassuring me when I start to get nervous.”  “I hope that’s a good thing.”  “It definitely is. I think if I didn’t have the reassurance, I’d chicken out of some things.”  “As long as you’re aware of the difference between some healthy nerves and anxiety that could be a sign you should slow down. And that you keep telling me how you’re feeling.”  “Of course I will.”  “Good girl.” 
An understanding seemed to pass between you as you sat in near silence, eyes on the other. Until Roger drew in a long breath and stood up.  “Right well, I think that’s just about everything. Obviously we weren’t able to see the levels of bruising that different implements can cause but it’s kind of dependent on the individual anyway. Everything can influence the severity of bruises and other marks. Tell me what a bruise is.”  “It’s broken blood vessels under the skin which cause discolouration.”  “Bingo. Now, obviously being spanked with a hand will leave less obvious bruises than being hit with a crop will and usually a paddle will bruise less than....i don’t know, a leather belt. But there's lots of factors to consider. The sub’s age, diet, the colour of their skin, their hydration level, how much sun exposure they’ve had recently, stress levels, hormones. And the biggest of all is how much stimulus they receive on that part of the body. The more you hit a spot, the deeper it will bruise. So, don’t expect bruises and marks to appear exactly the same every time you make them. There are some ways to heighten or lessen marks left during BDSM, but I’ll go through those when you’re ready for our practical lessons. And we’ll also go through some ideas for popular scenes and positions before we settle on what our scene will look like.” Roger seemed to hesitate for a few seconds, “Of course, it’s not so late we have to stop. If you did want to start testing out some light impact play, or if you wanted to revisit a previous topic, you’re more than welcome to come back to mine.”  “No,” you said much too fast, the suggestion catching you completely off guard.  “Okay, no problem,” Roger said, his eyes downcast.  “I didn’t mean...just that tonight’s not great timing.” You’d really thought you’d got out of having to talk about it but you could see Roger was going to ask what you were talking about when on a regular tutoring night you’d likely still be in his bed. All the same you couldn’t quite make eye contact as you explained, “My period started last night, that’s all. Makes things a bit awkward.”  “Oh is that all?”  You shrugged, “Yeah.”  “Well there’s no need to feel awkward or embarrassed about that. And there’s no reason to hide it from me. Aside from the fact that I’ve been married and had kids, I’ve also been teaching biology for longer than I care to count, so I’m very familiar with the reproductive processes and the reality of the menstrual cycle.”  “I knew you were going to say something like that.”  “Because it’s true. And besides, periods are important to factor into our lessons because they can change how you’ll respond to various kinks. Fluctuating hormone levels can change how much you enjoy or desire sex, as well as the physical sensation of different forms of touch. A lot of women find breast stimulation uncomfortable in the lead up to their period because their breasts become tender at that stage of their cycle. It can also make vaginal sex undesirable, at least in the first couple of days if not longer, whether because of a physical discomfort or pain, or just because it makes sex messier and more annoying to clean up after. The hormonal shifts in a menstrual cycle can also effect libido too, either stopping you from feeling aroused or causing hyper arousal. And all of that is important to consider, especially when we get to other things like orgasm denial. So, don’t feel you have to hide your periods from me, okay? I want to know if something is going to effect how enjoyable these lessons are for you. And plus, I factored periods into the timeline, remember? If you want to postpone for a week we can.  His little speech did put you at ease a bit, the weight of admitting the truth no longer as heavy now that he knew, but it still wasn’t an especially comfortable conversation, “Well, I should be okay to go in a few days.”  “Would you be up for having sex on one of the last days of your period when your flow is a little lighter? Or would you rather wait until after it was finished?”  You tried not to cringe too much upon hearing Roger talk about your flow, “After I think. I don’t know. How do you feel about it?”  Roger shrugged, “If we were just having sex without the kinky stuff I’d be okay with period sex. It’s a little more effort since we’d need to put towels down and all that but I’m not completely opposed to it if we’re both in the mood. However, I think since we’re playing with BDSM it’s probably a good idea to wait.”  You nodded, glad the topic was almost settled, “Yeah, that makes sense. I think I’d feel too self-conscious to enjoy any period sex but you’re definitely right about the BDSM stuff. Just makes it easier for my first time trying things out if I’m not worrying about, um, bleeding everywhere.”  Roger gave you a reassuring smile which made your heart flutter, grateful he hadn’t made things too difficult or drawn out, “That’s settled then. We can put a pin in all of this for now and come back to it when you’re ready.”  “Thanks. Will Friday suit? I think I should be right by then.”  “Friday sounds great.”  “Really? You don’t have to, like, pick up the kids or anything?”  Roger shook his head, amused, “No. It is technically my weekend with them but they’re both staying at friend’s placed over night so I won’t see them until Saturday. Friday we can start testing some things and if we need to, we can come back next Monday and go through more. And I finish a bit earlier on Fridays so maybe we could start a bit earlier.”  “Yeah that works for me.”  “Great. I guess we should get out of here then.” Roger ushered you from the classroom and walked beside you all the way to the carpark, your footsteps echoing down the corridors. He chatted to you quietly about non-kinky topics, as if you’d merely ended up walking the same direction by accident, just in case anyone was looking.   You were almost sad to reach your car, drawing the conversation to an end, “This is me.”  “One last thing, Ms Y/L/M.”  “Mmm?”  “For homework-”  “Homework?”  “Yes. For homework I want you to watch some porn with impact play in it. You’ll find a few examples linked in a document I’ve dropped in our folder but feel free to find your own too. It can be spanking by hand or flogging or any other form of impact we discussed today, whatever turns you on most. Because I want you horny when I see you on Friday. I want you to spend all week thinking about naughty sluts who get spanks, knowing you’ll soon be one of them. I want you excited to be hit and wet at the thought of me spanking your arse and cunt while I fill your holes with cock. Is that clear?”  Roger had leant closer as he talked and your stomach did a backflip as he stood up. All you could do was nod, completely lost for words as Roger chuckled and walked into the dark towards his own car.   
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barnesbabee · 3 years ago
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𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂 𝓭𝓪𝓽𝓮 - 𝓽𝔀𝓮𝓷𝓽𝔂
|| ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ || ⇜ᴘʀᴇᴠɪᴏᴜꜱ - 20 - ɴᴇxᴛ⟿
⟿ ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: No sensible person would turn down their boss if they looked good as good as Seonghwa. But maybe they would wish they had…
⟿ ᴄᴏɴᴄᴇᴘᴛ: CEO!Seonghwa x reader, bestfriend!Yunho x reader || Social Media!AU || no gender specified for the reader
A/N: IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG
ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ: (send me a DM or an ask to be added) @ateezappreciation @shinyddeonghwa @lilithpooped @cloudyyeonnie@yeosangmystar @wooyoung-a @sanisms @mingismoon @lovelyvitamin @anawwyd @annasbannas @im-just-trying-to-survive-man @uglychildd @oddlittlefandomist @hwahomie @jin-neck-shaft @lovelyvitamin @yeosangmystar @skmoonchild @lovelymultiwrites @sunwooyoung
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The day was long and silent, and although no one had gotten any sleep, no one could close their eyes for more than a minute. The haunting picture of Yunho's dead body and splattered blood clouding their minds. The only one who hadn't seen the body yet was Jongho, but he was too busy trying to make sure Mingi wouldn't freak out again.
The five of you eventually fell asleep, when your bodies finally calmed down and gave in to the temptation.
You were, however, suddenly awoken by a loud noise of something falling. All of you sat up straight in the living room and looked around. There were only four of you. Mingi.
All of you stood up immediately and began searching the house in a panicked state, calling out for Mingi as you did so.
"Are you fucking kidding me!?" Seonghwa yelled, after a couple of minutes of looking.
You all ran towards where he was. You found Seonghwa holding a crying Mingi by the arm, in the attic of the house.
"What happened?" You asked.
Seonghwa roughly pushed Mingi towards you all.
"I got here and this dumbass had opened the skylight and was trying to get onto the roof!"
San held Mingi's hand and moved the man to stand behind him, angrily looking at Seonghwa.
"Hey man, take it easy." San advised.
Seonghwa placed his hands on his hips and widened his eyes.
"Take it easy? Take. It. Easy!? There's already a dead body in my fucking house, from a situation that I had nothing to do with, mind you, and I was about to have a second body to bury because of this fool's bad choices. I am helping you idiots out a lot and you're pushing me to the limits, okay!? I have a lot to lose here. I have a company to run and a lot of people that are going to lose jobs if the CEO goes down as an accessory to murder."
There was only silence, as it dawned on the selfish group what they were asking of Seonghwa.
"I'm sorry." San said, not even able to lift up his head and look Seonghwa in the eye.
The latter shook his head and walked away.
"I'm leaving the house. Keep an eye on that douchebag."
The sound of the front door slamming echoed in the house, and all of you felt incredibly embarrassed. Once you got back to the living room, Jongho surprised all of you. He sat Mingi down on the couch and stared down at him.
"I'm tired, Mingi. I really am. You made those two go out into the woods to fetch a dead body, you made them scrub blood off of walls and off the floor, you made Seonghwa, who doesn't even like you by the way, he's doing this for Y/N, hide a body in his house, and you were going to kill yourself!? Are you that much of a fucking coward!? Mingi you're not 16. You're a grown man, you're almost 22, it's about time you start taking accountability for your actions, we can't baby you forever, 'cause it's getting tiring. We're all desperate here, and we have to worry about yourselves, about dead Yunho, and now about an unstable manchild. Focus on the fucking reality Mingi."
Jongho was straight-up yelling by the end of his rant, eyes nearly bulging out of their sockets and face red, out of anger. He then stormed off, just like Seonghwa, leaving a very quiet and tense room.
San sighed and sat next to his friend.
"You know, he's right Mingi. Maybe should've worded it better, but you really can't do what you were about to do... You were about to screw us all over when we are risking our lives to help you. This isn't just about you anymore."
Mingi could only nod, and cry, as his aching throat wouldn't allow him to do anything else.
You sighed and stood up.
"I'm... I'm gonna go find Seonghwa, I need to apologize."
You picked up your coat from the coat hanger near the door.
"You know where he is?" San asked.
"I have an idea..."
You were sure he was back at the office. He felt comfortable there, it was a place where he could take his head off of all his worries. Also, he kept his best whiskey in his office... It wasn't very far from his house, but you were impatient, you needed some time alone with him desperately. You showed your pass to the security by the entrance and they let you through, as you hurriedly made your way to the CEO's office.
You could hear two voices chatting from the inside, you didn't quite recognize the other person, but you were pretty sure it was Hongjoong. You knocked on the door softly, ignoring the big 'do not disturb' sign.
"I- Hongjoong what the fuck didn't I ask you to put the sign outside!?" You could hear Seonghwa ask.
You heard his heavy footsteps walk closer to the door and for a second you were afraid, maybe you shouldn't have come...
The door opened slowly before you, however, interrupting your thoughts.
"My apologies but I'm currently- oh it's you baby." Seonghwa pulled you in a big bear hug as soon as he realized who you were.
You hugged him back, a little hesitant with Hongjoong seeing you two acting romantically. Seonghwa realized you were a little stiff and pulled away, then realizing what the discomfort was about once he saw you looking at Hongjoong.
"Oh, I told him... I hope it's fine. He's kind of known from the beginning."
You closed the door behind you and followed Seonghwa into his office, as you looked at Hongjoong with an 'oh really?' look, making him chuckle.
"Well I did try to call dibs on you when you got hired but he got salty about it, and then every time I made a comment about you he'd get mad. I still did it though, I knew something was going on and I wanted him to tell me." Hongjoong explained as he smiled brightly.
"Yeah yeah good times, why don't you tell them about 'wanting to bend them over your desk and making them beg'?"
Hongjoong's head perked up and his eyes widened, as his ears turned bright red.
"Seonghwa what the fuck-" He whispered, feeling a little uncomfortable in the room.
You were a little embarrassed, but also proud.
"It's fine, plus," Seonghwa got up from his chair and stood behind you, grabbing your hips in the process "they like it. They love to hear how they want to get fucked, isn't that right, Y/N?"
You pressed your thighs together and kept your gaze focused on the ground. Seonghwa gripped your jaw and forced you to look at Hongjoong.
"I- I do like to hear that..."
Hongjoong chuckled and got closer to you, inspecting your body from head to toe.
"You're one lucky son of a bitch, Seonghwa..."
Seonghwa rolled his hips against your ass, so you could feel his boner.
"Hmm, I am aren't I..."
You chuckled and decided to take the opportunity. You knew Seonghwa liked to relieve his stress with sex, and you owed him at least this much for helping you out.
"What's so funny, doll?" Seonghwa asked, curious about your chuckle.
"I was just thinking about all the times you called me a filthy whore, when you're the one practically begging to have a threesome with me and your best friend... Who's the whore now?" You teased, knowing you were pushing all the right buttons.
"Ooh, are you gonna let them talk to you like that."
Seonghwa chuckled as he gripped your throat.
"No, I'm not."
He turned you around and pushed your body against a wall, keeping you trapped by his own body.
"You know which buttons to push doll, maybe I'll reward you for that later. But now, you're going to take this cock in that pretty little hole of yours, and then you'll suck off Hongjoong. Wouldn't want him to feel left out, would we?" Seonghwa asked, with a devilish smirk.
"No sir, we would not." You replied, wearing the same smirk.
Seonghwa felt as if he was falling in love with you right there and then, he felt like he finally found the perfect match, but he could leave the sappy shit for later.
The man placed a short, but intense kiss to your lips before gripping your hair and guiding you to kneel in front of Hongjoong.
"Come on baby, show him what you can do, make me proud."
You smirked and looked up at Hongjoong, as you worked in taking off his suit pants. You slipped them off, along with his boxers, and his hard dick nearly slapped you in the face. It wasn't huge but damn was it pretty. You teased him a little, licking a long stripe, from the base to the tip, teasing the head with your tongue, causing him to groan.
"They always like this?"
"Yeah, they like to see me suffer, but it doesn't last long 'cause..." Seonghwa paused and knelt right beside you, pushing your head so Hongjoong's cock would be fully in your mouth "I'm impatient. But they like it rough."
Seonghwa sat on his desk, as he watched his best friend fuck your mouth, slowly. He pumped his cock to the same pace your head moved, and you'd soon start hearing small groans from both men.
"Shit, Y/N, on all fours."
You complied, pulling out of Hongjoong. He groaned at the cold air hitting his member, as he missed your mouth already. Seonghwa knelt behind you, and entered you very slowly. Hongjoong was about to put his dick back in your mouth, but your partner stopped him.
"Y/N, colour?"
"Green, very green."
Seonghwa smiled and slapped your ass lightly, then giving Hongjoong the green light to continue.
You had to hold off your orgasm a couple of times, as the feeling of both men filling you up and the sound of their needy moans was too much to handle.
"Do you wanna cum?" Seonghwa asked, figuring it out from how much you were clenching.
"I'm almost there baby, you can cum, cum for us."
A couple more thrusts and a spank from Seonghwa were all it took to take you over the edge. It didn't take both men much to 'cross the line' either, Hongjoong painting your face with his cum, and Seonghwa your ass. Their moans combined was something you secretly wanted to hear again.
Seonghwa picked you up, bridal style, and looked at you.
"Come on man, I wanted to kiss her." Seonghwa complained, as your lips were stained by Hongjoong's cum.
Hongjoong felt embarrassed, after coming down from the high he wasn't as confident as Seonghwa.
"Are you okay darling?" Your partner asked, brushing your hair away from your face.
You just nodded.
Seonghwa and Hongjoong helped clean you up and both got dressed.
"I guess you should go deal with the... situation."
You looked at Hongjoong with a confused face, as you zipped up your trousers.
"Situation?" You asked.
"Remember when I said I told him everything? I meant everything."
You widened your eyes once you realized what he meant.
"Seonghwa are you insane!?"
"Calm down Y/N, he's not snitching on anyone! Plus I needed to tell someone who was on my side. I was going insane with your friends constantly baying Mingi."
You sighed. You really couldn't be mad at him for it. You hugged him and kissed his cheek.
"You're right... I'm sorry I got you involved at all and thank you."
Seonghwa kissed the top of your head.
"It's fine, let's just get this over with so I can be with you."
Your bid goodbye to a (still) very embarrassed Hongjoong and left, so you could go back home and deal with the drama. You wished you could just take the car and run away, and live by yourselves until it all washed away, but it wasn't that simple. And it was about to get even more complicated.
When you got to the house and opened the door, a weeping Jongho stood over San's limp body.
"What!? What the fuck happened!?" Seonghwa asked as you and him rushed to check on San.
"I- I don't know! I left after you did" He said, hinting at Seonghwa "and when I came back Mingi wasn't here and San was on the ground. He's still breathing but I don't know what happened."
"What!? Why did you leave?" Seonghwa asked.
"Everyone was upset at Mingi for constantly behaving like a child and Jongho yelled at him and told him to stop expecting us to baby him and that he had to take responsibility for his actions, it got too much and Jongho had to leave for some air..." You explained.
"Responsibility for his actions?..." Seonghwa repeated to himself, trying to figure out what happened, and suddenly a sad idea popped into his head.
He ran into the garage, leaving you and Jongho confused, and holding San.
The man came back just as quickly, looking preoccupied and horrified.
"The body is gone."
69 notes · View notes
neonun-au · 2 years ago
Note
k, n, s, t!
K: what’s the angstiest idea you’ve ever come up with?
veeeeerrrrrryyyyyy timely question considering the fic i am beginning to work on now haha. i have some issues with angst in the sense that a lot of it is just....sort of like exploitative trauma porn in a way. angst for angsts sake vs actually for serving a grander story. so i tend to sort of try and straddle a finer line with it in my own stuff !
there are two, i think. both end with an inevitable ending: death. but both in very different ways. one is a prequel to a fic that i have had on my blog since winter 2021, from what i once was, and it's sort of....leading up to what that fic is sort of dealing with (without really giving too much away). the other one, the one that i am actively planning and embarking on now, is one part relationship drama like...falling, loving, losing, and re-finding but all with the backdrop of the end of the world. so trying to find that person you love and recapture that before its all over. it's inspired by this song and i am quite excited to stick this one out ! (i think its gonna be a dokyeom fic also...so thats fun, cause ive never written him)
N: is there a fic you wish someone else would write (or finish) for you?
i would like to just give all my ideas and thoughts to @97-liners and see her bring them to fruition because her writing is just deeeelicious. apart from that, nothing specific haha i just would like someone else to write nice big, well written fics for pentagon or onf (i havent either but.....i just want to READ them)
S: any fandom tropes you can’t resist
mmmm i dont think so. im very focused on quality and it takes a lot for someones writing to really pull me into a fic so there arent really any tropes that i go to regardless. there are some aus i have real soft spots for, like true slow burns, mafia, fantasy, historical...but those are far and few between haha
T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?
i dont know if theyre technically tropes but a LOT of things in smutfic really bug me and thats a big part of the reason i dont read much of it haha (apart from the fact that i just...im not really that hard of a fan LOL v soft). anything like...dom/sub dynamics (regardless of who is who i just think theyre misused and when they ARE used right, i just am not that interested in it anyway lol), anything hybrid, family aus, parent aus....i have no interest in them. that being said i will read most of these things if the writing is good enough to hook me regardless of the subject LOL
>fanfic ask game<
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heyitsyn · 4 years ago
Text
Manager!Seijoh OIKS ROUTE
a/n: this,,,, is probably the angstiest out of the routes and i seem to only write angst for oikawa and i think its a problem
this is for @what-a-creative-username​ bc oikawa is their favorite seijoh boy so this is for you 🥺
and actually buckle your seatbelts bc this is my longest work and its the biggest mess ever :’) also, this is kinda all over the place soooo
anon:
- May we have an x Oikawa ending to the Manager AU?
- okaayyyy so this is a request for the manager series. please pleASE PLEASEEEEE- make a oikawa ending! 🥺 cuz he’s my favorite and all those times with him in the story feel like more than just friends
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OMG IM SORRY BUT MY INNER OIKAWA SIMP THAT I NEVER KNEW WAS EVEN THERE STARTED TO PEAK THROUGH
so basically yea
as seen in a lot of the parts,
oikawa is very,,,, loving towards you
like his entire demeanor was just so different and so,,, authentic,,,, than the ones he shows to other females
maybe it was because you didnt want him in the beginning?
the moment he saw you, he did his first antics and he expected you to turn red and fluster and cutely shy away from him 
yanno the works
yet you gave him a stony stare and denied him
ofc he was hurt and a little offended bc were you rejecting him?
hes never been rejected before and he prides himself for that but you just did and continued to do that
so he made it his mission to make you at least feel something for him
like the period part or his random proclamations of his love for you
he did it all
it didnt matter if it would bite him in the ass later because he was impulsive and he wanted you to show yourself being affected with his charms
because he was the FREAKING OIKAWA TOORU
ong this is like his validation that he is still a ladies man and has a charm that couldnt be resisted by anyone
he constantly told you that he loved you to see a reaction from you and he always was touching you whether it was just the shoulder or your hand
oikawa wanted to see you as his own personal cheerleader and you reacting to his affections would really bring him over the moon
this brings us here in the gym today
‘y/n-chan, do you want to go-’
‘oikawa-san, i dont trust you wanting to go on an innocent outing without any hidden intentions’
the team snickered and he pouted, eyes watering and curling at your side
‘y/n-chan, please? oikawa-san really wants to spend time with you~’
he begged and you finally looked up from the notebook and stared at him
god hes been much more annoying lately but you knew it was his way of letting out his anxiousness and nervousness for the incoming interhigh
so you decided to indulge him just this once and made a deal with him
‘the moment you try anything, even remotely romantic or flirty, i will leave’
you bargained but he gasped
‘what?! then what’s the point of-’
‘so you DO have hidden intentions, oikawa-san?’
you raised your eyebrow causing oikawa to quickly shake his head and detach from you
‘fine. none of that stuff, just hanging out, okay?’
he was still fussy but he accepted it
oikawa had a plan to take you to a cafe that just opened up and take you shopping and basically spoil you because girls like that, right?
they fall for boys who give them everything, right?
nope
so i read a study that surprisingly most girls arent into shopping apparently and they prefer to buy something themselves because apparently they feel indebt and dependent on men if they let them spoil them like that
idk about you but i would let oikawa spoil me tho
his plans were completely crushed when you argued with him for nearly 15 minutes to take half of your tab with the food
‘y/n-chan! i invited you out so i should pay! and boys have to pay!’
he complained, holding the other end of the tab envelope thingy but you pulled it back towards you
‘oikawa-san. you should never listen to societal normalities and instead listen and respect my wishes of paying for my half rather than going by the rules of males paying for females’
im sensing a bit of a bokuto and akaashi typa relationship between you two
oikawa shook his head and slightly stood up to lean over the table, his face approaching yours and you were slightly surprised by the sudden closeness causing you to lean back and be focused on getting away so your grip on the tab loosened
he grinned as he snatched it away from your grasp and quickly placed his card into the slot before running up to the cashier
your mouth was slacked and surprise was still written on your face even when he returned and oikawa held up a peace sign to try and lighten up
but your shock morphed into being upset
‘oikawa-san, listen here. you had-’
but he waved you off with a smile
‘no, you listen here, y/n-chan. oikawa-san loves you therefore he will give you everything in the world and all you have to do is sit there and point at whatever you want because my love will bring it to you~!’
you rolled your eyes
‘please stop being like that, oikawa-san. im not your girlfriend so dont act like my boyfriend’
he lightly scoffed, disguising it with a cough
‘y/n-chan, i dont think you understand. oikawa-san is telling you to be his good little girl and sit down. i dont understand why youre being so stubborn’
he growled softly
wHAT iS hE sAYinG
you shook your head in disbelief and stood up collecting your things making the brunette to also stand up in curiosity
‘y/n-chan? youre leaving already? i wanted to go see other places with you! i wanted to take you shopping!’
you halted and looked up at him through your long eyelashes
‘oikawa-san, i’d rather you save your money and rest your injuries instead’
you reasoned but he raised his hands in front of him to signify his wish for you to stop
‘but i want to be with you, y/n-chan’
he whispered and you blinked
‘i dont want you to spend a single dime for me after this. just you and me, oikawa-san, no money, just us’
he nodded eagerly
‘we can go anywhere you want! just,,, stay with me’
then he found himself in a bookstore with you
it was a quaint hole in the wall bookstore that you both found as you walked down the street and you excitedly dragged him inside, hand still laced together
the rows of shelves that contained different worlds in the pages were your serotonin
he watched you excitedly run to the fiction section and browsed through the different spines for anything special to check out
‘y/n-chan, i’ll go use the bathroom really quickly’
you nodded and oikawa kissed your temple before he left towards the restroom
your eyes flitted across the different titles and you snatched a book of poetry
oikawa hurriedly walked over back to you but he didnt find you at the place you were before
so he continued sifting through the mini hallways of shelves and then he stopped
it was so,,, domestic 
seeing your bright eyes looking down at the book  on your hands and the way your mouth slightly moved with the words
it was such a simple sight yet why did you look so beautiful?
the shimmering eyes that flittered when you came across a sentence you liked 
the soft lips that kinda jutted out making his desire to feel it increase that he would give anything to feel on his own
you were so focused that you didnt notice him moving behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist, only noticing his head resting on your shoulder
‘’come, my darling, it is never too late to begin our love again’’
he mumbled to your ear and you released one hand from the book to grasp his arms that were around your middle
‘you read poetry?’
you whispered and oikawa chuckled
‘of course. a man as romantic as I am ought to be a poet’
he reasoned and you laughed
‘yet you fail to sway me, oikawa-san’
‘no, there is a difference. you dont want my love but i know you want to be loved by me, i can assure you!’
you swiftly placed the book back on its former place and you turned around to swing your arms around his neck
‘hmm,,,, love was never something for me. especially with you boys around’
oikawa looked down to see your shorter height and he caressed your hip
‘i love you, y/n, so let me love you the way you deserve to be’
he whispered not understanding the weight of his words and you looked down to hide the growing blush on your face before burying your face into his sweater-clad chest
‘so not fair oikawa-san’
you mumbled against the fabric but he heard it and he bursted into giggles
‘ehh~~ youre not being the fair one, y/n-chan! youre make it so hard to not fall for you when youre so beautiful~!’
he whines and you rested your chin on him so you could look up at him and your pout made him squeeze you tighter
‘hah?! that doesnt make sense! im nothing but a mess of-!’
you started but was cut off when he kissed your nose and whispered:
‘but what a beautiful mess you are’
okay so i know this is the saddest one out of the routes but ive just been serving fluff so the angst is coming soon!!!!!!
once you both were finished in the bookstore, you suggested going to this hill that allowed you to see the stars clearer
‘hmm, oikawa-san, there’s this place that natsu used to take me to whenever he wanted to see the stars so i think you’d like it’
you mentioned while walking on the sidewalk
oikawa’s hand was clutching yours and you were swinging it back and forth while lightly skipping and kicking the rocks
he watched you, amused, at how child-like you were acting right now but he was also touched, knowing your knowledge of his love for space
‘sure!’
the night sky allowed the stars to light up and you both shared giggles and laughs as the two of you stumbled over your feet with no light except from above
however once you made it to the top of the hill, oikawa pulled you close to him as you huddled on a seated position
‘how’d you know i would like this, y/n-chan?’
he asked and you gave him an obvious look
‘hah? its so obvious! you keep drawing the cancer constellation on your skin and you had an astrology book in your bag that you were also reading in the bus’
your answer brought warmth inside him and he never thought you were so perceptive of him
you noticed every little thing he does and hes,,,, never had someone do that before
except for iwa and his family and team, no one knows of his little ticks and the way he becomes obsessive of a topic once he gets interested in it
you noticed it all
‘that right there, its the big dipper!’
you pointed and he followed the direction of your finger before nodding
‘yep! waaahhh its much prettier seeing it higher up than my roof!’
he exclaimed and your gaze left the constellation towards the boy beside you
‘really,, pretty’
you absentmindedly muttered yet he was sharp and heard you
‘but its different to look at something much more beautiful’
this caused you to quickly go back to looking at the stars so you missed his love-filled eyes
‘i want to name my children by constellations. so that they can keep the oikawa legacy going forever like constellations being at the sky for all eternity. or naming it after the sky! then i can make sure theyre never going away’
he said and you nodded
you kept pointing out different shapes and laughing at his funky claims of what some stars connected to and created
‘oikawa-san, lets go to the star festival later’
you offered and he in turn looked away from you, turning red at the way the small lights illuminated your face and somehow making it more,,,, angelic
so he covered it up with his own teasing 
‘oh? the meeting of the two lovers?’
you dont know why but your cheeks burned at the mention of the ‘L’ word and oikawa noticed, quickly poking fun of your cheeks
‘oh, y/n-chan, dont be so shy!’
you pouted and turned away
‘never mind’
oikawa’s laugh rang throughout the space and he pulled you closer, practically sitting on his lap, while pointing out the stars and him pressing kisses to your cheeks
the intertwining of your fingers combined with the kisses made you feel as if you were floating with how free you felt
and you loved every moment of it
after that outing with your captain, you were conflicted
it wasnt the first time he’s openly said he loved you and his shower of affections have been there since the very beginning
yet how come you were just now feeling,,,,, different??
you were sure you felt an odd feeling inside you when he said your name with no usual suffix and it wasnt just the food that didnt agree with you
whenever his lips came in contact with your skin, it left blazing trails of red that spread out as far as it could
the heartbeat that quickened once he kissed your forehead at your doorstep and the grin you last saw when you closed the door
or the unknown smile that you didnt know you had on until natsu, who was visiting, pointed it out
‘darling, why are you just standing there? and why are you smiling like that? its weird, stop it’
you didnt even have the attitude to scold him and you giggled before twirling and holding his hand
‘oh, natsu~ i want to dance! and sing!’
you shouted, taking him with you and dancing around the living room
tbh natsu was very worried but he remembered you mentioning that you were meeting some guy today and it might be the reason as to why you were acting like this
he was happy
you deserved to be loved as you are and you were finally getting that love
but,,,,,,,,,
it didnt last long
albeit having a lot of fun, oikawa seemed,,,, off to you
it was,,, awkward
maybe it was because you were now aware of some type of growing attraction inside of you or every little thing he does to you could send you into shapeshifting and channeling your inner tomato
forget potato, youre now a tomato
but even his touches and affections were now limited
restricted
like the the next time you both saw each other, you shyly but happily bounded up to him and greeted him good morning
but his eyes widened, taking a step back before laughing awkwardly
‘ah ha ha, hey y/n-chan’
oikawa greeted then side-stepped to enter the gym
god you felt like you were slapped in the face
you remained frozen, staring at the spot he previously occupied and your mind was running quickly
was it because your senses were now heightened that everything made you extra sensitive?
usually, oikawa would squeal at the fact you were even greeting him this morning but he literally just walked away from you
no, you were just,,,,
overreacting
right?
yea, just,,,
overreacting
iwa noticed your downcast expression and he had a feeling it had something to do with oikawa’s off expression
you hurriedly placed your bag down and took out your notebook to start taking notes for their practice
big boy ace went up to you and placed a hand on your arm which caused you to flinch
he immediately backed off, letting go and stepping back
‘wh-hey? y/n? you okay? did something happen?’
he worriedly asked but you shook your head, not even bothering to meet his eyes
‘uh-yea. mhm, perfectly fine’
you lied and he wanted to press further but mattsun and makki called you over to check out their blocks so you ran to them
but he had a feeling you were just taking every opportunity to not answer his questions
while you were pre-occupied with the meme team, iwa marched up to oiks and tugged him around to fully talk to him
oikawa watched your interaction and he knew iwa would immediately start questioning him too
‘oi, what the hell did you do’
there was an underlying tone in his best friend’s voice that he didnt particularly like
oikawa did what he does best and plastered a smile on his face
‘hm? what do you mean, iwa-chan?’
‘what the hell do you mean what do i mean? you speak japanese dont you? so tell me what the hell happened during your date because it seems like shit happened and now youre both acting weird’
oikawa flinched at the blunt words but it was the truth
he was acting weird and this caused you to probably act weird too
god hes so dumb
but he,,, was going through stuff right now
it was a situation that he didnt want to involve you in 
and,,, seeing you dancing with natsu with the biggest smile on your face through the window of your house
okay guys dont think this is weird or stalker-ish bc i actually saw this in a kdrama ages ago and i thought it was just so sweet and cute and dont take it the weird and stalker creepy way :(
it certainly brought him pain
this was what he wanted though, right?
he wanted to see a reaction from you with his antics and he wanted to see you flustered and giggling like one of his lovestruck girls
but dear god that was when he became aware of your growing feelings
oikawa even saw it before you did with the way you gave him those longing stares and small smiles and the small squeezes of his hand when he would laugh
initially, he wouldve teased you for it but then he kept quiet
this entire time he knew you, he felt,,, love,,, for you
and by god, he was so scared
he wanted to run away
because he was well aware of his personality and him as a person 
he could make you smile the biggest and the happiest but he was also the type to make you feel the most pain and cause the deepest wounds on your already fragile heart
he didnt want that responsibility and burden
it was too risky
oikawa knew he was a ticking time bomb and he was afraid if you got even just a centimeter closer
you would be the one hit with the blast the most
maybe it was that sight that made him want to distance himself
it was a sight that made him realize that you deserved someone much better and that someone couldn’t be him
the happiness that danced in your eyes and the smile that decorate your beautiful face
can you imagine the irony?
the moment you notice of your growing feelings, the moment he decides to withdraw and pull away
.......
practice was,,, suffocating? 
the team knew of the tension these past few days and you both def were not the same
oikawa has not said he loved you or even pestered you once and as much as the guys hated seeing it, they were getting worried
did you both fight?
what happened?
when oikawa was talking with the coach and you were grabbing something from the storage room, they immediately took this chance to pounce on iwaizumi since he was the closest to the both of you
‘oi, iwaizumi, the hell happened?’
makki asked and the others nodded, wondering the same thing
but they were surprised when he shrugged
‘dont know. stupidkawa refuses to talk and i dont want to bother y/n bc she seems,,, weird about it’
if iwaizumi didnt know, then something serious did happen
you and oikawa continued this weird eggshell walking and you even gave up after trying to ask so many times on what was wrong and only to be answered with,
‘nothing~! y/n-chan should never have to worry her pretty little head about old me~!’
that answer didnt bother you
it was his smile
the genuine smile that you were so happy to receive as it was only for you
now seems gone and replaced with his fake one as if you now became one of his fangirls
what took the cake was his appearance to practice with a girl in his arm
they were both laughing and seemed trapped in their own little bubble to even notice the team’s wide eyes and concerned looks to you
you didnt even notice your teary eyes until mattsun quite literally picked you up and shouted he wanted to help you fill up the water bottles
he placed you outside, sitting on a bench by the gym
you were biting your lip and staring at the ground while he was leaning back and looking at the sky
‘the sky is very pretty today’
he complimented but it wasnt heard by you
you only came back to reality when he nudged you gently and you shot him a crooked smile but he sighed at the look of hurt written all over your face
‘oh, y/n, i am getting increasingly worried for our generation. theres so many sad eyes on happy faces’
he tutted and returned to gazing back up to the clouds
you scrunched your nose and scoffed
‘i dont understand you, mattsun-san’
you mumbled and fiddled with your fingers
mattsukawa issei shook his head and pointed above
‘y/n-chan, our eyes enables us to identify beauty and we have the urge to immediately capture it to remember that we did find something beautiful. yet, we feel hopeless as we cant to put the beauty on paper because we are only given one crayon to draw the sunset’
it felt all muddled
there was no sense in his words and you were sniffed, trying to understand
‘mattsun-san, did you eat any more of those candy makki-san bought from that one guy?’
he bursted into laughter and you couldnt help but quirk your lip at the sound of his joy
‘who knows? taka is my boy and i trust him so if he gave it to me, then,,,, it cant be that bad, right?’
you blanched
‘mattsun-san! im not about to go pick you up from the er again just because makki-san dared you to do something!’
mattsun finally wandered his eyes over to you and he tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear
‘thats the thing with you, y/n-chan. youre quick to love others but you lose pieces of yourself in the process. i have no right to tell you who deserves it but please ask yourself, is that sacrifice worth it?’
you knew he wasnt talking about your love for the team
but for the love for a certain setter that didnt go unnoticed by the middle blocker
leave it to mattsun to make you laugh and you were letting out your last giggles as you stepped into the gym
oikawa stopped talking and focused on the two of you, 
more specifically,
you
he watched as you laughed and swatted mattsun’s elbow as he jokingly made fun of your height by resting his arm on top of your head
yes this was what it was supposed to be
you deserved someone who could make you smile and only smile
he doesnt even hesitate but even imagine the tears that would fill those beautiful eyes and he knows it would all be his fault
no
he will stop that from happening way before it would occur
he will do anything to make sure you will never cry because of him so he will distance himself and now, he gives up
it could just be his stress and insecurities talking but he knows right now,
he wants you away from him
oikawa tooru, the boy who could get anyone he wants, couldn’t get the girl he wishes for the most
dear god was it laughable
after practice was finished,
you quietly and quickly packed up the nets and picked up the balls to get yourself out of there
these past few days made you feel so much confusion that it hurts
if there was anything worse than him not talking to you,
it was not knowing why 
that curiosity and desperate need for answers creates wild and self-destructive theories 
did you chew too loudly when you ate?
were you boring and not as fun as the others?
was he angry and humiliated of his pride as a man when you scolded him for paying for you?
has he gotten tired of you now that he knows who you really are?
that last question suddenly created a new set of tears to appear
throughout the day, you were so composed and distracted yourself with the lectures of your teachers and not anything of why this certain brunette was avoiding you
but a single insecure question made that wall crumble and you hurriedly shoved the trolley of balls into the storage room and grabbed your bag before rushing out of there
you sniffled and hurriedly walked home so you could go and cry on your bed in peace
but ofc 
hiroshi natsu exists so ofc he distracted you when you entered the house with a red puffy face
quietly, he led you to the couch and he wordlessly grabbed a tissue box from the coffee table to dab away the tears
you sniffled and clenched your fists to will yourself to stop these dumb salty water drops
‘i cant tell you its going to be okay because i dont want you to cling on to false hope. but i know it hurts. its worse that of all people, oikawa tooru had to be your first ever crush’
he chuckled
you took a shaky breath and wiped your face
‘this was why i shouldnt have liked him. god! all we did was eat dinner and look at the stupid fcking sky! thats it! so why-! why do i suddenly like him?! AM I THAT DESPERATE?!’
you wailed and blew your nose while natsu patted your back
‘i mean,,, to others it sounds like youre easy to sway’
you looked up from the tissue to glare at him but he continued
‘but to me,,,, it sounds like it was just the last push you needed to finally see oikawa tooru in that way’
you nodded, laughing weakly
‘i dont know why im acting like a lunatic like this. hes just a crush anyway so it’ll probably fade in a day or two so bear with me until then, kay?’
but his grim shake of his head gave you no hope
‘rather than fade, it will grow. and i might have to bear with this for the rest of our lives. now you be a bad bitch and sit there and look fine as hell while i go order 10 boxes of pizza and load up teen moms’
the impromptu movie night distracted you a little bit from it all but you still couldn’t help but think about it
GOD WHY WAS NATSU SO DRAMATIC?!
BECAUSE OF THAT IDIOT YOU ARE NOW SITTING IN CLASS, BAGS UNDER YOUR EYES, AND BREAKING YOUR PENCILS IN HALF
all you have to do is make sure you think of oikawa doing something disgusting to make that attraction fade away
oikawa licking his toes
oikawa licking his toes
oikawa licking his toes
oikawa licking his-
‘y/n?’
you snapped out of your daydream when kunimi reached out to you
kindaichi, who came over for lunch, and him were staring at you in concern and they shared a look
‘y/n, something must’ve happened that day with captain’
kunimi started but kindaichi snapped
‘see?! this is why we shouldve never let you go! the first time you go with him and now youre a mess! tell us! did he force himself on you?! did he-?!’
you stopped the onion top boy with a forced smile and a squeeze on the arm
‘o-oikawa-san would never do that, kindaichi. hes better than that’
‘but clearly not because look at you!’
he shouted and you flinched 
kunimi hurriedly knocked him to the floor
‘get ahold of yourself, kindaichi’
he mumbled and you stood up and walked to the bathroom at the west wing that nobody uses so you could freely cry without any suspicion
was it obvious?
was it clear that you have been a mess after a week of being ignored by oikawa?
nah, youre just being a dramatic little shit
youre sticking to your word of quickly forgetting about the whole ordeal
but you definitely cant if your nightmare was happening before your eyes
as you approached the bathroom from the end of the hallway, 
you saw an unknown girl but an all too familiar boy giggling and rushing to get inside the bathroom
and for good measure, oikawa looked around to make sure no one was there but then he saw you
despite the distance between you, he could see your glistening eyes from the sunlight that seeped in from the big windows
he saw the way your hand trembled and your eyes twitched when haruna poked her head out to see why he was still outside
‘oikawa-senpai~~’
she drawled out and reached a manicured nail to his wrist 
your eyes followed her touch and then you and the boy shared eye contact
through the watery eyes, he could clearly make out your silent plead
please dont go to her
please
stay with me
dont go
but he went in anyways
------
that was the moment you forced yourself to not think about him anymore
as if you werent even working your hardest lately, you will work your hardest now
everything between you and him was now strictly professional as practice that day signified the very first day of your moving on stage
you couldnt believe these past 2 weeks has been a real nightmare yet you were slowly waking up from it
there was nothing you could do about it bc oikawa obviously didnt mean anything he said to you and maybe thats what ticked you off the most
you were easily led on
he blindly tugged you along the moment you saw his smile
he definitely thought of you as just as a game and when he finally got tired and bored, he dropped you and went to another
kunimi and kindaichi noticed the coldness of your eyes and the stoic expression on your face and they were genuinely terrified of you so they didnt want to ask any questions
even with packing up, you aggeressively shoved everything in your bag and the blep boy finally gained the courage and nervously tapped his finger on your desk to gain your attention
you swiftly dropped in your pencil case and looked at him
‘what’
he flinched at the cold tone and his eyes showed concern
‘uh-i-are you okay?’
he slowly asked and you visibly clenched your jaw but you nodded anyways
‘never better’
you didnt bother waiting for him to finish packing up and even passed kindaichi by the door as you were walking towards the girl’s locker room to change into your manager outfit
your entrance to the gym made the noise die down and you noticed the third years with glares on and aggressively practicing
‘whats wrong with all of you’
you asked and iwa scoffed before shaking his head and opening his arm
‘cmere. i missed you’
he said and ngl you were a little confused bc this wasnt something iwa usually did but you still stuck to his side
‘why-’
‘he told me what happened’
iwa whispered and you stiffened in his arms
‘w-what?’
iwaizumi flung the boy to his own bedroom wall
he huffed, panting at both the weight of oikawa tooru and the intense anger that burned through his veins
‘you-you are a piece of shit!’
he shouted and he moved to grab oikawa’s collar and lifted him so the brunette could see the fire and disgust present in his olive eyes
‘you think i didnt see what the hell you did? fcking leaving y/n sobbing as you-you-! AGH!’
iwaizumi couldnt even finish his sentence as he was so angry that he harshly sent oikawa flying back down to his floor
oikawa was crying
not from the beating
but from his regrets
god he knew he messed up
he shouldnt have done it
but he did
iwa ran his hands through his hair and angrily sat on his best friend’s bed, eyes shooting daggers at oikawa
‘right now. tell me the truth right fcking now or so help me god’
he hissed 
oikawa tooru shuffled closer to the wall and brought his knees up to his chest
‘im so scared’
he sobbed
‘im so scared, iwa-chan’
his tears were pouring down and he brought a hand to muffle his cries
‘i-i just w-wanted to-to see something out of her. li-like a reaction! because she wasnt like th-the others! but instead i fell in love! me! and she did too!’
he pointed and quickly stood up, pacing and gripping his hair
‘it was all just for fun! she-she knows im like that! yet she still fell in love with me!’
‘how could you tell she-’
‘BECAUSE OF HER EYES!’
even iwa flinched
‘HER EYES SHOWED ME LOVE! HAPPINESS! AN-AND YOU KNOW WHAT SHE DID?! WHEN SHE GOT HOME?! THROUGH HER WINDOW, I SAW HER DANCING! SO HAPPY SHE WAS DRAGGING THAT BASTARD COUSIN OF HERS AROUND! I DID THAT! I CAUSED THAT!’
there was so much confusion in this poor spiky haired boy bc he knew oikawa was in love with their manager so why is he avoiding her now even though she reciprocates those feelings?
‘im missing something here, oikawa. youre telling me, she loves you, but youre here regretting that?’
his tone of disbelief made oikawa shut his eyes in frustration
‘DONT YOU UNDERSTAND?! YOU CALL ME A PIECE OF SHIT EVERYDAY AND I KNOW THAT! I FCKING KNOW THAT IM A PIECE OF SHIT AND A FCKING BASTARD!’
he shrieked
thankfully, his family wasnt home currently to see him breakdown
‘SO WHY THE HELL DO I DESERVE A LITERAL ANGEL?! A GODDESS?! A BEAUTIFUL PERSON FOR ME?! A FCKED UP NARCISSIST EGOTISTICAL IDIOT?! AN IDIOT WHO’S TOO PRIDEFUL TO GET THE HELP HE NEEDS?! I COULD HURT HER! I COULD DESTROY HER IN A SINGLE SNAP! THE SCARIEST FACT IS I COULD DO IT WITHOUT THINKING! I COULD SAY THE WORST THINGS TO HER AND IM SO SCARED THAT I WILL HURT HER! I DONT DESERVE HER, IWA! SHE DESERVES SOME-SOMEONE LIKE YOU! AND IT HURTS TO THINK THAT BUT I DONT CARE! A-AND WHAT IF WE GET TOGETHER?! HM?! HOW LONG DO YOU THINK IT WOULD TAKE HER TILL SHE FINDS SOMEONE BETTER?! HOW MUCH CAN SHE TAKE OF GOING THROUGH EPISODES OF SOME DEPRESSED, INSECURE, PRIDEFUL ASHOLE LIKE ME?! HOW LONG DO YOU THINK SHE WOULD REALIZE HER SELF-WORTH AND KNOW HOW MUCH OF A SHITTY PERSON I AM?! I CANT-!’
iwaizumi pushed himself up from the bed and rushed to grab his best friend before forcing the brown haired boy to his chest
oikawa tooru was having a panic attack
he heaved and wheezed and loudly let out his cries and iwa made them sit on the floor where he could comfortably cry
‘youre such an idiot, tooru. but she knows that, doesn’t she? she knows who you are, what you are, how you are, your flaws, everything- she knows all that. yet she still fell for you, doesnt that tell you something? for once in your life, consider other people’s feelings before yours. y/n is one hell of a girl and i wont allow you to let her slip past you just like that. i know- we all know- how much of a broken person you are, oikawa, and it hurts us all to know that no matter what we do, we can never fix you. but y/n-gosh, y/n is the only person to even have a chance to do that. and you admitted that youre depressed and you have a problem? well,, get some help for that, oikawa. the first step to be better is by accepting the only person who can accept you for you’
iwaizumi didnt reveal to the other third years of what happened but just said that oikawa did a really terrible thing to you and hes currently repenting for it
however mattsun and makki pretended they didnt hear oikawa regretting it and focused on the fact that the captain even had the NERVE to hurt you
iwa squeezed you tightly and you returned the hug
but he whispered something in your ear
‘everyone makes mistakes, y/n. the only thing we can do is to repent for them’
you pulled away, about to ask him what hes talking about but one look from his eyes made you realize what he was talking about
he mustve known what happened but hes defending him
you clenched your jaw and looked away
‘i destroyed myself for a stupid reason and its one of my regrets. im not going to make the same mistake twice’
you quietly hissed and moved to your station by the bench to begin taking your notes
you noticed that oikawa was late for practice today and although you kinda hate him, you are still a manager first and he was one of your responsibilities
you were about to go to the coach and tell him you’d look for the setter when the gym door slid and in came the devil himself
but there was a large bruise on his cheek and a cut on his lip
your feet moved quicker than the rest of you that you were in front of him in a second
‘what happened to you’
you worriedly asked and oikawa just stared at you
his eyes shook and watered at the sight of you
this was the first time you talked to him without any coldness in your tone and he missed it
he missed hearing you
his silence made you roll your eyes and you roughly grabbed his arm before throwing him on the bench you were sitting on
the team watched, on edge of whats happening, but was put back to practice when you gave them a side-eye
your fingers opened the ointment and your kit to treat the bleeding lip and the swollen side of his face
‘youre the captain. its not wise to fight before practice and be late. youre hindering everyone else’
you coldly scolded and oikawa shrank back
‘it was iwa-chan’
he mumbled and you stopped and quirked an eyebrow
‘what? why did he-’
then you froze
iwa knew
and he beat oikawa up for it
he fought his best friend for it
and iwa didnt look fazed at all
despite being a muscle freak, iwa was very soft and his iron defiency made him prone to bruising
yet why was he so clean
it was like iwa hit oikawa but in turn, the other didnt fight back
no
you must stop
youre overthinking again and youre over analyzing it and youll end up at the place you were before
however
oikawa noticed the dawn of realization on your face and he shakily reached out to touch your hand
‘i,,, didnt. because i deserved it. i-’
he sniffed and you knew he would start crying right now
the last thing he wanted would be to cry in front of the others so you immediately stood up and went to the coach
‘coach, oikawa-san needs treatment that i dont currently have with me. i would need to take him to the infirmary’
he nodded and waved you off so you had the clear
oikawa flinched when you harshly grabbed his arm and pulled him up so he could follow you out the door
it was such an awkward silence between you both but you bit your lip, focusing on the fact that you were just doing this bc he was your obligation
it was like you threw him to one of the cots then you rummaged through the medicine cabinet for an extra cotton ball and a better ointment
‘i fcked up, y/n’
your movements halted and your eyes drifted down, looking at the tiled floor
‘i messed up so bad’
he hoarsely said and you could tell how much pain he was going through by the way he let out a shaky breath
‘oika-’
you made a move to turn around but he stopped you
‘no! dont look at me! just-just dont,,, i cant-i wont be able to say it if i look at you’
he cried and you nodded
oikawa leaned his forehead on his intertwined hands with his eyes on the floor before starting
‘i want to say im sorry. because everything, all of this, it all started as a game to me’
you closed your eyes tightly, tears welling up in your eyes
‘you,,, you didnt bat a single eyelash at me. you didnt try to please me, you didnt chase after me, no, you didnt see me like that. it made me,,, i dont know,,, confused,,, that girls like you even existed. it,,, not gonna lie, ticked me off and i was offended that you brushed me away so easily like i was some,, some bug on your shoulder. so,,, i wanted to see,,, and try,,, if i could make you,,, like me. and i know! i know its messed up but god y/n i swear i didnt want to hurt you. i just,,, i wanted to see if i could ever make you look at me like the way they did but it backfired. i wanted you to chase me but in the end, i ended up chasing after you. i chased and i ran without knowing that you were slowing down for me so i could catch you. that,,, that date made me realize of how,,, how perfect and beautiful you are a-and how unworthy i am to even receive anything from you. i saw how happy you were after that, dancing, twirling that poor idiot around. at first,, it made me so so proud. and so happy that i made you do that. i put those stars from the sky into your eyes and somehow you made them shine much brighter. then,,,, i got scared. i started thinking about,,, about me. and how i am. ive been trying so hard to please other people that ive lost sight of the real me and how terrible i am. and y-you! i just- y/n its so hard for me to explain all this right now- my current mental state, the pain on my face- i cant,,, but at that moment i realized that you,,, you were better off without me. youre so kind, so beautiful, so smart, you could go do so many good things in life. and im just going to hold you back. i didnt want to hurt you so i,,, chose to just cut the string now and,, we wont get hurt later. but,,, i regret it. i regret it so much, y/n. all my life,,, everyone cooed and awed at this child just because of how he looked like and,,, he got used to it. everyone wanted me because i am oikawa tooru but they didnt want the entire oikawa tooru. iwa,,, iwa hit it into my head that,,, you,, were the only one who bothered to even see that side of me’
when he finished, he looked up but gasped at the sight of you standing in front of him
fat tears were rolling down your face and you wore the angriest expression
‘i-,,,i hate you so much, oikawa tooru’
you seethed
your eyebrows were scrunched up together and your nostrils flared as you cried harder and you let out a cry
‘i hate you, i hate you, i hate you’
you chanted and oikawa saw his vision cracking
his world was now falling apart
he did the last thing he would ever do and you were now at your most pained moment
‘youre so selfish, impulsive, and terrible’
you whined and punched his shoulder at each word
‘but i love you so much. i hate you because you made me cry and made me feel so hurt but i still love you. why-why cant you stop playing your games, tooru? stop playing with me now! stop it! stop-!’
you didnt get to say anything else because he grabbed your waist and held you in his arms
it was like you didnt even weigh a thing by the way he lifted you to sit on his lap and he gently led your face to his neck
‘im so sorry’
he repeated constantly while brushing your hair and rubbing your waist
you and oikawa tooru spent an hour sitting on that bed just crying 
after a while, you stopped and resulted to just hiccuping
‘youre selfish, tooru. you listened to yourself and did whatever you wanted rather than talking to me. i hate you but i,,, i love you, oikawa-san. i shouldnt say that but if i dont, im afraid you’ll go ahead and do something stupid again’
he chuckled but he squeezed you tighter
‘i dont,,, want to let you go, y/n-chan. let me be selfish a little longer and love you all to myself’
and by god did he become selfish
it took you a while to get over your defensive and guarded actions from him but you were slowly finding yourself forgiving him
YO IM SORRY BUT I WOULDVE DROPPED HIM LIKE PLEASE WHAT THE HECK Y/N REALLY REALLY LOVES THIS GUY
natsu absolutely despises him still and whenever oikawa even comes over, hes always glaring at him and oikawa would shift uncomfortably but accept it bc he deserved it
‘i didnt realize how badly i hurt you, y/n. i could never imagine you accepting me still. ill spend the rest of my life making it up to you’
he promised and you laughed
you were both lounging on your bedroom floor, mean girls playing in the background, while just staring at the ceiling
you brought your clasped hands up so you could look at it
then a goofy smile settled on your face and you turned to look at him
‘just continue loving me, oikawa-san. thats all i ask for’
then graduation came
of course the boys were all teary but oikawa seemed even more sad and he refused to look at you the whole day
you figured it could just be him being mopey over not seeing you everyday like he was able to before
then you both were walking home and he still hasnt looked at you
the silence was killing you but you just kept a tight grip on his hand and he would smile at you and kiss your hands
it still didnt wash away the odd feeling in your stomach but you would talk to him later after you gave him present
for the weekend, you were able to convince your parents to go on a beach trip at okinawa while you made natsu go over to tokyo and stay with katsuki
oikawa didnt know your family was out so he stood by your door, waiting for you to enter
you both stood there, staring at the floor, not knowing what to say
until you softly grabbed his hand
‘come in. i want,,, to talk’
you mumbled and oikawa’s eyes widened, silently panicking that you possibly found out
it was a secret not even iwaizumi knew so you couldnt have known
right?
you led him up to your room and pushed him down to sit on your bed
FLKDSJFLKDJ WHY AM I DOING THIS WHAT IS HAPPENING SOSOSOSOSOSOSOS
ALSO Y/N IS NOW 17 ON THIS YOU GUYS LIKE BLS SHES ONE OF THE OLDEST IN HER CLASS BC HER BIRTHDAY SITUATION SO SHES BEYOND THE AGE OF CONSENT IN JAPAN, RIGHT?
oikawa was confused and he watched you bite your lip and look off to the side
‘y/n-chan? why are you nervous? you said you wanted to talk?’
he asked
but you unzipped your skirt and let it drop on the floor
‘for graduating,,, and working hard for these years,,, im giving you this’
you finally met his eyes
then he knew
oikawa blanched and he quickly stood up and placed his hands on your shoulder
‘y-y/n! uh-i-are you sure? a-arent you-’
‘accept it, tooru. youre,,, my first love,,, so,,,, ill give you my other first’
KSDLFJSDKFJSDLK OKAY YALL LETS STOP THERE FOR NOW AND GO TO THE TIMESKIP OKAY?
OKAY
-----
oikawa was running in the airport
despite the shouts of civilians he accidentally pushed, he made no sign of stopping and if anything, ran faster till he reached outside
the rush of his sudden trip home was clear as he was only carrying a duffel bag full of clothing he hurriedly stuffed inside 
when he met the orange ninja boy in brazil, he quickly caught up with his underclassman and got drinks to talk about japan the last 2 years of his career
they both got simple beers and some appetizer to share as they reminisced the past
hinata was excitedly talking about the reconciliation of kindaichi and kageyama and how they were still enemies on court but were now friends
‘eh~? tobio-chan making up with kin-chan? what’s next? flying sushi?’
he joked and hinata laughed
‘it was partly of your manager, oikawa-san! she helped them make up!’
the previous smile on oikawa’s face slipped at the mention of you 
‘hmm,,,, she always made the impossible happen’
he mumbled and hinata nodded
‘l/n-chan became close to kageyama through kindaichi and kunimi and she would bring us food and stuff too! but only on times she wasn’t busy’
the ninja said and dipped his chip into the salsa while oikawa stared at the liquid
‘you guys must be special for her to go all the way to karasuno’
then hinata said something that caused the brunette’s ears to fall deaf to the loudness of the bar
‘it wasn’t a problem since coach ukai took care of her son’
oikawa didnt even give hinata another word when he rushed out of that bar after overcoming his shock and straight into his apartment
there were tears that blurred his vision as he shoved in shirts and pants and other necessities for a trip to japan
he argued with the front desk lady to give him a ticket to the earliest flight to japan despite her saying that it was hard to give him a seat when the plane was full
but luck seemed to pity this baby daddy as someone pulled their ticket out and he was able to take it for himself
it was the longest journey of his life and his hour long layover gave him an opportunity to call the only person he thought would even know where you were
iwaizumi
oikawa paced at the waiting lobby with his phone pressed to his ear as he listened to the ringing of his call
he bit his lip in anticipation and ran his fingers through his hair for the upteenth time until finally it was picked up
‘damn you, shittykawa, do you understand what time-’
‘iwaizumi, is y/n still in japan?’
of course his best friend was startled with the question as the setter hasnt asked him any question related to you in a few years
‘wha-how the hell am i supposed to know that? im in california, oikawa’
‘dont lie to me. she still talks to you since youre probably the godfather of my son’
he hissed and iwaizumi was now fully awake and his heartbeat was beating quite quickly 
how did he figure out
‘oi, oikawa, listen to me she-’
‘please! dont!’
he shouted and didnt care if he startled anyone else around him
‘dont lie to me! of all people! you dont lie to me!’
‘why should i tell you when you were the one who up and ran? huh?’
oikawa fell silent and iwaizumi could hear his sobs through the phone
iwa sat up on his bed, leaning against the wall as he contemplated revealing this secret you begged him to keep since his best friend sounded like he was on the verge of breaking apart
poor oikawa tooru already suffered so much
‘i swear youre going to make me regret this. but y/n is in,,,, tokyo and,,,,, she,,,,,, didnt want you to know about,,,, about everything. well-she did want to tell you but she had her own reasons not to and,,, and its perfectly valid for her to choose whatever she wanted. and yes, i knew and yes, i am his godfather but please, oikawa, whatever you do, dont go to japan, you understand? shes still hurt by it, idiot, and shes angry and you sound angry and-’
but of course,
oikawa didnt listen and he hung up but continued his pacing but this time, tears blurring his vision
the taxi driver noticed his frazzled expression and quickly stopped in front of him
oikawa gratefully hopped in and quickly told the driver the address he forced out of iwaizumi (with great reluctance)
‘this is the last time, understand me, tooru? youve already hurt her so many times and i cant bear to see it all over again so you need to fix it. but you mess this up again, not only will you lose her, you’ll lose me too’
the old man felt sorry for the young lad and stepped on the pedal to get him to his destination in the quickest time 
the apartment building was several stories tall yet the elevator ride felt like a snap when he finally arrived at the floor your apartment was supposedly on
what the real kicker was when he stood outside your door and he hesitated
would you let him in?
would you even want to see him?
would you punch him?
would you cry?
he was so worried but didnt realize that he already pushed the doorbell and a faint shout from inside made his heart jump
‘UNCLE KYOOoooo,,,,,’
the door opened and the boy’s voice went quiet, knowing this wasnt the man he was expecting and he quickly and harshly slammed the door shut to his face
oikawa was stunned
was this the right apartment?
did iwaizumi trick him?
but those thoughts were wiped away when the door opened again and a girl was softly chiding the boy before turning around with a smile to greet the person but then it fell
similar to her son, she slammed the door shut and oikawa panicked
‘y-y/n? h-hey!’
he exclaimed and with a clenched fist, he stood there
you were hyperventilating inside
how did he find you?
why is he here?
does he know?
‘mama? who’s that oji?’
the bright eyes of yozora looked up at you and you blinked, briefly seeing the man behind the door at the face of your son
you sucked in a deep breath before smiling lightly
‘yoyo-kun, can you go play with dino-kun while mama and oji talk?’
yozora blinked back up at you before shrugging and nodding and running off to your shared room
once he was gone, you quickly composed yourself and opened the door again, shocked to see oikawa already half-way down the hallway to the elevator
‘would you like some tea before you go?’
you called out and he stopped, almost giving himself whiplash at how fast he turned his head
it was like his instincts took over when your voice started speaking to him
as if he was 18 again, oikawa found himself trailing after your voice and you nervously led him inside
his eyes were moving really fast as if he wanted to quickly soak it all in before it would disappear
this was where you lived
with your son
who was his son too
there was a picture by the door of you and the little boy from earlier
it was at the planetarium nearby and tooru’s heart bloomed at the sparkle in that child’s eyes
jesus, he was beautiful
‘yozora. thats his name’
you said, noticing him staring at the picture
KDFLJSDKFSD PRINCE NOCTIS LUCIS CAELUM BABIESSS!!!
‘night sky’
oikawa whispered
the teapot was still hot and you were able to pour him a cup so you both sat on the dining table where he sat across from you
‘n-nice place’
he stuttered out
you nodded, tracing the rim of your own cup
‘its natsu’s and katsuki’s actually. my parents kicked me out so they offered to let me stay with them’
you reasoned, not meaning to sound cold but it came out as if you were being passive agressive
‘o-oh? ho-how is he-’
‘oikawa-san, what are you doing here?’
he visibly flinched
calling him by his last name stung since you called him ‘tooru’ the whole relationship so returning to his surname is your way of cutting off the whole thing
‘i,,, i found out. a few days ago. from shoyo. he told me their coach looked after yozora and,,, i knew he is,,, mine’
you let out a humorless chuckle
a scoff
then you looked up to meet his gaze, oikawa gulping at the hardness in your eyes
‘what makes you think so? what makes you think that i wasnt angry and spiteful enough to give myself to someone else so they could have what the great oikawa tooru had? what makes you think that i would remain loyal to you despite you just running off to the other side of the fcking world without a word? hm? oikawa-san? what.makes.you.think.so?’
out of guilt, he broke the stare to his own steaming cup of green tea
‘nothing’
you whispered
he shakingly sighed and you could tell he was about to cry
but you rolled your eyes and crossed your arms
‘go ahead and cry, oikawa-san. im used to temper tantrums. i have a son for god’s sake’
‘you would never do that to me, y/n. you promised that you would always love me and only me and i know you take promises to your grave’
he reasoned but it sounded like it was him convincing himself
the dry laugh you let out made him fidget
‘and you promised that you would always talk to me and communicate. yours is a much lighter and easier promise than mine yet you get to break it and i can’t? no, oikawa-san. to me, its like that year never even happened’
you were now just trying to rile him up due to your anger towards him
you shouldve let him walk to the elevator and leave and never come back
but you still invited him in anyways
oikawa snapped his head up
‘you cant say that or mean it, y/n. that boy over there, hes a reminder of me. he looks exactly like me so you cant ever forget what we have’
‘what he had. it was simply the past, years ago, and everything has changed since then. dont you dare try to dig up buried secrets, oikawa’
‘but why did you keep him from me?’
he pleaded, desperate for any answer as to why
‘i had every right. the moment you boarded that plane, he no longer was yours. you left, i stayed, and you cant just come back here and-’
‘mama?’
a small voice from the corner halted your loud voice and you and tooru looked at him
oikawa yozora was exactly like his father
from his loud and obnoxious personality to even the brown hair and brown eyes
KFDSLJFKDS REMEMBER THAT KID FROM OLD UKAI’S VOLLEYBALL CLUB?! THATS WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE!!
he looked absolutely nothing like you and people even get confused when you say hes your son
um maam i think hes my son since he came out of me
so oikawa was right
yozora was your daily reminder of the mistakes of your youth but he was anything but that as he is the greatest thing to ever happen to you
yozora became your light when you fell into depression after oikawa ran away
sure, your parents absolutely loathed poor child as he is a child of a child
but you kept him because he means the world to you
and the world he holds are in his eyes
‘i,, i heard yelling,,, and,,, thought mama and oji were sad,,, so,,, i bring my,,, star book because,,, it makes me happy,,, and i think,,, mama and oji will,,, be happy too’
he mumbled out and you smiled at him before moving to go to him but oikawa stopped you
his eyes begged you and you glared at him, deciding to withdraw
if he decides to do anything, you could always knee him between the legs
he slowly approached yozo and kneeled down to reach eye-level
‘hello, my name is oikawa tooru’
he softly introduced himself and yozora just stared at him
‘you oikawa too? but i oikawa! mama is he me?!’
yozora shouted and you giggled, running to take him into your arms
‘oh, darling, how curious you are. oji isnt you, baby. he just,,, has the same last name as you. like mama has hers but you have,,, oji’s’
your eyes drifted to oikawa but he remained on the floor, staring at the spot where yozo stood on
you kept his last name
you listened to him from that night at the hill by naming his son after the night sky
my god, you are so,,, 
‘--the book. oji? do you?’
he was brought back to reality when your son was now back on the floor and poking his shoulder
tooru blinked and looked at him
‘huh?’
‘i ask if you want to read my book with me, oji. mama say she happy but you still sad so my book make you happy’
not even an hour of meeting him, oikawa tooru already loves him
the volleyball player nodded and yozora offered a tiny hand to which he accepted
‘this way. mama say to read so she make food. i like food, do you like food, oji? i like food. i like milk bread. mama say papa like it so i like what papa like. i want papa to come home. sit there’
tooru’s heart beat faster every word his child uttered and it even went faster when he saw yozo struggle to get up on the couch
the pair of big hands that brought him on the cushion made him happily sigh then uttered a small ‘thank you’
‘my mama say that my papa give me my book and say to take care of it until he come back. and she say he come back when im a master of space! so i study and read my book every day and know all so papa can hurry home!’
tooru didnt even notice tears falling down his face until yozo blinked up at him with his small hands grasping his cheeks to wipe it off
‘why you cry, oji? no sad! no sad! here! i read my book so you not cry’
he babbled and quickly pried the book open and read out the words on the page, not realizing he was saying most of it wrong
that book was oikawa’s
the book that he read all the time in the bus and now, it was passed on to his son
you leaned against the wall and gasped at the sight of yozo just babbling and oikawa crying
‘yoyo-kun? what did you do to tooru?’
you fussed and sat down next to oikawa
yozo worriedly looked at him and now his own eyes were watering and soon enough, you have 2 boys crying in your living room
GURL IM SORRY BUT I WOULDA KICKED OUT OIKAWA LIKE NOT EVEN OFFER HIM TEA OR ANYTHING IM SORRY IM TIRED AND IDK WHATS GOING ON
‘a-ah, y-yozo! yozo-kun! oji is,,, just,,, uh,, sad because,, because pluto isnt a planet anymore!’
yozo sniffled and he went closer to oikawa
‘me too, oji. yoyo sad too because pluto is just small. other planet are onii-chan and onee-chan but pluto is baby so they not like him’
he rambled and oikawa pulled him closer
‘mama, can we keep oji? nana-san and katsu-san will like him! promise!’
you couldnt even believe what was going on right now
not only did your baby daddy ex-boyfriend suddenly pop up, your son was now wanting to keep him
you made a move to of course deny his request but oikawa opened his mouth first
‘yozora-kun, of course you could keep me. im your papa, after all’
OKAY THAT WAS IT
YOU DID NOT WANT HIM TO SAY THAT TO YOZORA
out of shock, you slapped him across the face
causing yanno what happened
oikawa screamed
a/n: yoooooo SO LIKE THIS IS RIDICULOUS LIKE THIS IS BOOTY IM SORRY BUT THIS IS ALSO IN MY GOING TO EDIT LIST AND I CHOSE THIS OUT OF MY 10 OTHER VERSIONS OF THIS ROUTE AND I MAY OR MAY NOT RELEASE ANOTHER ONE JUST TO MAKE UP FOR IT. but try not to let this flop 🥺 👉👈
ALSO CHI THAT K+Y AND THE T+Y IS ON THE WORKS RN AND IM LIKE HALF WAY DONE SO I MIGHT RELEASE THEM BOTH AT THE SAME TIME
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normal-thoughts-official · 3 years ago
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I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOUR BEAUTY AND THE BEAST IDEA. But may I also propose: Magnus cursed from a young age (probably bc of Asmodeus) that anyone who touches him is hurt by a blast of magic he can't control. (This may result in his mother's death). He locks himself away of his own will. Alec teaches then that it's fear that makes him lash out. Featuring: touch starved Magnus.
this idea is GENIUS actually and i love it. tbh me and my friend have a similar idea that we talk to each other about (lol) but it isn't a B&B thing, its more of an adventure AU. anyway, lets go!
so in this universe i guess magnus banished asmodeus like in the original sh verse but asmodeus cursed him with the "everyone you touch will be in indescribable pain" thing. maybe just as revenge, maybe to try and use it as bargaining chip because okay magnus, is it freedom that u want? u want to be able to have ur own friends and ur own life? fine. get me back, and ill leave u alone, and ull be free to have friends again. if not, ull be still isolated just like before. so is it gonna be win-win, or lose-lose?
but magnus doesn't budge because he knows that if he lets asmodeus free things will only get worse not only for him, but for the whole world. he is too dangerous to be out there. so, magnus resigns to his fate
and i guess in this version he wouldnt have a lot of close friends because he had been with asmodeus his whole life before he was cursed, so he was just. alone in his self-imposed isolation with no one to talk to. maybe he enchants the furniture so they gain sentience but they can't really feel pain, so at least he has someone to talk to. god im so fucking sad already
so is the furniture his friends in canon? im not entirely sure how i feel about that but also the idea of ragnor as that clock from the original movie is great. thats my most important thought on the subject ngl
btw its 4 degrees Celsius in here so im typing with gloves on so ull have to excuse my typos i am a mere brazilian and i want death
anyway okay so i guess his friends are like pieces of furniture that he spelled into sentience and they aren't his servants or anything cuz that's gross but they just like, hang out. wow im actually managing to type pretty well all things considered
so at least magnus has people to talk to but he's still touch starved because you know... a clock can't hug you and that'd just be weird. maybe them becoming sentient was an accident? lmao like magnus just wanted to automate some functions like having the clock talk to tell him the time or something and it turned out that they became sentient. possibly his magic is a little fucky because of the curse so that's why that happened? or maybe he just is way more powerful than he realizes and we all know he invented the spells he used to try and automate the things anyway. but if he gets people to talk to, well, he's not complaining
im focusing too much on this. anyway. id also like to note that im making rapha the cook/stove thing because i mean, come on. it's right there
and ok i guess alec comes into this because he uhhhhhh no u know i might go with that izzy thing. so izzy ran away from home because of maryse's bullshit and alec was sent to bring her back. so he was going after her but in the middle of the path there was the whole wolf attack thing that scared off his horse and LUCKILY magnus' house/tower/whatever was right next!!! so of course they take alec and his horse in but also WHOOPS there's a huge snowstorm that lasts for days (par the course for where magnus lives, actually. he DID want somewhere people would avoid. but also i think maybe his magic being fucky has something to do with it) so i guess alec is stuck at magnus' for the foreseeable future
which is HELL for magnus because he is terrified out of his mind that they will accidentally touch and alec will be hurt. and like.... his Constant Crave For Touch is already bad on a regular day, but having someone who could actually hug him in theory just makes it worse, you know? he hasn't interacted with other human beings in so long, just having one there is enough to make his need for touch almost unbearable and just... completely constant. it's hell
so magnus is scared, which means that he keeps to himself. so he tells alec not to go into his room, he tries not to eat at the same time, and other stuff like that, bUT his friends keep sabotaging his plans because they want him to have another friend, jesus christ!! (rapha being like "come on now magnus, you don't want my soup to get cold, do you? i'll be deeply offended. i guess you have no choice but to eat with alec". so magnus goes but the first thing he does is magic his regular table into a gigantic rectangular table with 41908410 seats and seat on on the side opposite to alec. alec just sighs
so like he's constantly coming across as rude because he is trying to avoid alec, alec just doesn't know why
but alec is also a stubborn bitch who goes stir crazy and refuses to just sit around isolated doing nothing while they wait for the stupid storm to finally be over so he can go get his sister. and magnus saved his life, so it's the least he can do to repay him in some way. besides, this is what, the first time that he's been completely away from his mom? for such a long time too? and he's finding that he feels... weirdly free and just relieved and he doesn't want to waste that opportunity with standing idly around alone all day. he had enough of that at home, thank you very much
besides yeah magnus is being rude but alec is used to straight up assholes and abusers (jace. i'm talking about jace. also maryse ofc but mostly jace) and magnus is not that. in fact he makes very polite conversation and is actually pretty fun during dinner, all things considered. he's just.... super private, i guess
AND magnus' friends are all being a nightmare with the making them interact so you know. they end up interacting. and alec makes it a point to help him take care of his house because it is a certified Depression Lair™. magnus can take care of it magically but it's like... so dark and almost suffocating at times and there is stuff like bad painting and piping problems that he never bothered to fix because it isn't affecting the functionality too much but it DOES makes life harder and alec "everything must be at 100% always" lightwood is not here for it so for a few days they are working on fixing the house and... magnus actually feels a lot better when the place has actual sunlight and looks inviting and like a home, he has to admit. when he says that to alec it might be the first time he's given him a real smile and man, is alec smitten
sidenote i guess this means that magnus doesn't exactly... dress well in this au lmaoo i mean it makes sense too because canonically magnus uses dressing up as a way to convey an image of power and untouchability and he doesn't really need that in this AU since he is completely isolated. so i guess he is a bit more like twi magnus - bare-faced and wearing comfortable clothes and the like. this isn't a twi au i'm just saying that it makes more sense for him to dress like that in that context
anyway. after the whole house fixing thing, they officially become friends. it turns out that alec also knows a bit about what it's like to feel isolated and touch-starved (altho he's always had izzy to help in that department, but still) and also what crappy parents are like. magnus shows alec his little mirror that he's enchanted to be able to show him anything he wants and how he uses it to be able to see all the places in the world he'd like to visit - he loves people, he loves culture, and sometimes it's all he can do to watch what's going on in Mumbai and it makes him feel a little better, so, he does that. he also admits that sometimes he catches on some drama happening and uses the mirror to see the people involved and make sure they are okay. kinda like a soap opera of his own but he has the means to interfere and help because of magic, so he will have someone who's struggling with money suddenly find hidden cash or have an "unknown dead relative" give them a lot of money in their will, or something like that. and if he also watches some of their personal drama that unfolds, well. he is lonely and it's not hurting anyone
but magnus doesn't tell him about the curse, and he still makes sure to keep his distance. it stings a little to alec, but it hurts magnus the most because fuck, maybe he just desperately needs someone who will give him the time of day, but he likes this guy and that only makes it harder to keep his distance. he makes it a point to always be at at least two arms length from alec, which alec thankfully respects and doesn't try to get him to breach, but. shit. it's still so hard to not want to just rest his head on his shoulder or get a hug or even fucking touch pinkies like stupid children and he can't. alec even once jokingly suggests that they have a ball since magnus doesn't know how to dance and magnus is actually excited for a second before he remembers that he can't, it would have to mean that alec touches him, and he can't
someone - maybe ragnor - even suggests that maybe he could try gloves and heavy clothing so alec isn't really touching him but magnus refuses to try because he doesn't want to risk it not working and alec getting hurt, because he'd never forgive himself. besides, getting a taste would only make it hurt more. he can't. he can't
but it's alright because at least he has some human company - he loves his friends, he does, fiercely, but it's different when they kind of have no choice but to be with him and also are enchanted creatures. he doesn't even know if they aren't nice to him just because he enchanted them into life, even tho to be fair if he had a choice ragnor wouldn't be that grouchy - and alec makes him laugh and gets him and helped make his place feel more like home, a little bit. and he can pretend that he feels the warmth from alec's body when they are sitting by the fire and feed these crumbs to his desperate need for touch and company
and then the snowstorm ends and it's time for alec to go
honestly, alec himself is kind of heartbroken, but- he loves his sister, and he can't just leave her alone in god knows where, even if he dreads the thought of coming back home now that he's been away from his family for so long. but magnus doesn't want to keep him, and doesn't want alec to feel pity for him, so he's all but pushing alec out of the door (not literally, of course. he can't do that, it would mean touching him) all "go, go, you never know when another storm might start. go see your sister. take my mirror, you can find her more easy". and alec's all "but it's been the only thing-" and magnus waves him off, of course, all "i can always make myself another one. besides, you'll have something to remember me by. now go"
so.... alec goes
and hooo boy magnus is heartbroken and a mess because even tho he knew how much having someone else there helped he had almost forgotten what it was like to be the only human in the house. he just feels extra lonely and even kind of bad about it because hey, his friends are there - not that they begrudge him for it, of course. it's not like they don't also hope for the chance to get out of the house and do other things, but well. they can't. so they understand him. and they know how awful he's feeling right then, but what can they do?
meanwhile alec finds izzy pretty quickly - she's living with this one insufferable villager named clary that alec absolutely can't stand, but- she's happy. and she doesn't want to come back, which alec expected, but he finds that he can't actually insist for her to come back. how could he, when he himself doesn't want to go?
and izzy insists that he stays with her - there's no reason for him to come back. they can stay in the village, and work, and build a life for themselves. alec is the only thing she's been missing ever since she left, and in here the both of them can actually be happy. and do it together, like they're meant to
and when he first gets into the village is the first time since izzy ran away that he was hugged and fuck, it's hard to say no to her
but also... he misses magnus already
and he doesn't know if he can just stay and leave him behind
and of course izzy is like "who is magnus?" so alec tells her the story, how he was attacked by wolves and rescued by this house that miraculously was in the middle of the single most inhospitable placealec had ever seen in his life. and the kind but wary stranger who always keeps his distance but seems so eager for connection, who made alec feel welcome and laugh and feel like he built a life for himself there
and clary tells him that she's heard of the story, but she never knew it was more than a legend - no one really remembers what happened. some say that magnus made a sacrifice to rid the village of a demon, and it turned him into a beast, forever locked in his castle. some say that he himself is the demon, and it's the tower that's containing him and keeping the village safe. some even say that he died battling the demon, and it's his ghost that keeps watch on the tower
she wants alec to explain which one is true, but it's all alec can say that none of these are right and he knows nothing because magnus never told him. all alec knows is that he doesn't want to leave magnus behind
and clary is like... well, if he's not a demon or a ghost, maybe we could bring him to the village too. he has magic, right? he could bring the tower closer. and maybe the other villagers could, you know, visit him and hang out. and he wouldn't be as lonely, and then alec and izzy could both stay
driven by this failproof plan, they decide to go back to magnus and tell him their great idea
except they are IDIOTS and forget about. you know. the damn wolves
and like holy shit is this pack big or what? like no seriously why are there infinite wolves in that one singular pack in beauty and the beast. like holy shit dude there's more wolves near the beast's house than in the whole yellowstone park
anyway there are Many Wolves and while alec is a good archer, izzy is a fantastic fighter, and clary is Fucking Crazy if you give her something stabby, there's only so many wolves they can take on at the same time
good thing magnus is a pining idiot who did in fact make himself another magic mirror and was watching alec with it. so he knows that the dumbass is in trouble and for the first time in years, he uses the portal (his own invention, and he had never gotten to use it before!) to get to them and fight off the wolves
so magnus saves all their lives, at the cost of getting severely injured and passing the fuck out. izzy, who's the one closest, runs to get to him and help put him on one of their horses... and is immediately hit by a blast of magic that almost makes HER pass tf out too
which is when they finally learn that, oh. that is the curse
izzy is fine, of course - the pain ended as soon as she was away from magnus
but it does pose the problem of How The Fuck Are They Getting Him Back To Safety, because they can't exactly wait for magnus to wake up (it's freezing, for starters) but with this amount of pain it won't be physically possible for them to hoist him up and get him on the horse. shit, will the curse work on the horse?
they bring alec's horse (by far the strongest of them because alec is huge buff mcgee) and try to get him to touch magnus and the spell does NOT work on the horse because in order to be dramatic asmodeus was like "you shall never feel human touch again" when he cast the spell, which accidentally gave a LOOPHOLE for non-human animals. so magnus could have had cats the whole time, which he had always dreamed of, but he didnt want to risk testing. besides, his house would be a poor environment for a cat and [self torture noises]
anyway thats one less problem to deal with, 99 to go, so they use some ropes to hoist magnus on top of the horse and bring him back to the tower (it's closer than the village) so they can tend to his wounds. thankfully, as the assigned Big Brother of a very irresponsible izzy, alec has experience with first aid, altho he never really dealt with anything quite this bad. and magnus' friends help, too, as much as they can. inevitably this means that alec ends up touching him even if by accident sometimes, but he knows what to expect so he Powers Through It because he won't let magnus die, damn. and as horrible as that is alec has experience with powering through pain, so. he's gonna bandage him up god damn it
izzy can't stand to see him dealing with that himself tho, so she helps, and clary ends up helping as well because they figure sharing the pain makes it easier and alec doesn't have to be too hurt. minimal touching accidents for alec! good
*narrator voice* And Then Magnus Wakes Up And Alec Hugs Him
full on launches on top of him and brings him into his arms and Magnus screams like NONONO OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING ALEC NO GET OFF ME YOU'LL BE HURT and his shock and distress at the whole thing sends another whole blast of magic that explodes that whole mf before it can touch alec and alec feels no pain and magnus is like.............. did i just COUNTER the spell? and everyone's like well! it looks like u did!
which earns him ANOTHER hug (oh my god alec stop he's so stressed out by this) (who knew alec was so touchy?) and this time he's paying attention to that gut reaction and because magnus is a Certified Magic Genius he realizes what it is that he's doing to counter the spell and immediately starts working on a way to turn this into unhexxing himself for good
which he DOES after some time idk how long but alec stays with him meanwhile and maybe izzy and clary do too, because magnus needs all the company he can get and besides, izzy has always wanted adventure and clary has never left the village before, so this is interesting to them at least. and magnus gets to meet new ppl which is nice
eventually the Begone Spell spell is performed and it works and turns out that when it does that it also unfucks magnus' magic and perfects his sentience spell turning all of his friends into humans WOW WHOD HAVE THOUGHT. so all of them are free to leave the tower as ppl at the same time and GROUP HUG!! and magnus cries like a baby in the group hug because holy shit hes been needing something like this so bad for so long and he never expected to have that with his friends but here he is :)
and then yeah they all move to the village to live a simple but fulfilling life and Magnus and Alec start living together in a little cottage and become husbands the end <3 this is so long too rip me
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rint4rous · 4 years ago
Text
hogwarts au! oikawa
a/n: wrote this with a bad headache LMAO so if you see mistakes no you didnt <3
yeah help
anyway
oikawa toru
sixth year slytherin
captain of slytherin quidditch team
this one. very popular with the girls.
always gets gifts and confessed to, he turns them all down nicely tho
he flirts with them a little but never goes out with anyone
thanks but no thanks, hes focusing on quidditch
mostly hangs out with hanamaki, matsukawa, and iwaizumi
you, sixth year gryffindor
a chaser for the quidditch team
actually you and oikawa had a bit of a rivalry thing going on
because oikawa was getting good grades AND is good at quidditch
and it doesnt even look like hes trying.
and he lowkey comes off as arrogant sometimes
and youre like i hate geniuses
the two of you met during first year when he tried playfully hitting iwa in the hallway but iwa dodged
and you happen to be speedwalking past and then next thing you know you get slapped???
you stop walking and turn to oikawa
hes like HOLY CRAPDFHJSHJR
“I AM SO SORRY-”
“it’s alright!”
“are you sure??”
“yeah, it was an accident, right? …. unless it wasnt?”
“NO I SWEAR IT WAS AN ACCIDENT”
“i thought so! see you ‘round!”
then you skip away
yeah. yall dont really start competing and shit until you found out your mom and his mom had BEEF??? WHEN THEY WERE IN SCHOOL????
you found that out at the end of first year
“i heard tachibana’s son is in your year. or i guess she’s oikawa now.”
youre like yeah what about it
“my dearest y/n, you’re a smart little girl, okay?”
“so make sure you’re better than that oikawa kid, alright?”
and little innocent you is like “ok”
so start of second year, you study and work extra hard
but here’s perfect little oikawa who always knocks you down to second place
at first youre like. i’ll just work harder!
and he joins quidditch and so do you
so you try hard at that too
you’re not like a sore loser or anything so when slytherin wins you shake his hand with a smile
but by the end of the year you’re just kinda :/ now because you never see him studying or practicing spells so how the fuck is he BETTER THAN YOU AT EVERYTHING!!! ITS NOT FAIR!!!!!
third year you come into school with like not very good feelings abt oikawa
and your mom was on your ass about your grades and you’re like omfggg im TRYING OKAY IM TRYING SO HARD
too bad tho thats when he starts liking you …
middle of third year is when you start expressing those feelings for oikawa out loud
“i hate self-centered geniuses. come back down to earth, will you.”
he heard you say when test results came back
and hes like is she talking abt me? lol nah shes probably talking about stupid ushijima over there
and then he finds out you were in fact talking abt him
hes kinda hurt lol
then when the new term rolls in
and the two of you just start talking shit about each other and start arguing all the time
“what’s the answer, l/n?”
“fairy wings.”
“oh my bad, i didn’t realize she said oikawa, and not l/n.”
“oh sorry, i thought you wouldn’t know the answer so i answered for you! i saved you from embarrassing yourself. you’re welcome~”
your seatmate yaku was holding you down with all his might and HOW IS LITTLE MAN ABLE TO HOLD YOU BACK HIS GRIP IS STRONG BRO
the whole class s ighs here we go AGAIN
the teacher doesnt even bother sending you guys out to hall anymore because this happens so much
you always try to sabotage each other in potions
one time his eyebrows almost burned off after his potion exploded in his face
makki and mattsun like LMFAOWFEHERGUYER
then when the year ends you’re like ranting to your mom like “i hate geniuses. who does he think he is? just because he can beat me at everything?? i’ll show him. i’ll make him eat dirt in the field. i’ll wipe that dumb smirk off his face. i’ll-”
your mom: omg my little baby so full of hate just like her momma
fourth year you’re so determined to beat oikawa at something
he sees you in the library, unprovoked, once and he comes up from behind you like
“aw, is l/n gonna try beating me again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”
you: hold it in hold it in hold it in YOU’RE MATURE NOW Y/N L/N. YOU SHOULD BE MORE MATURE THAN THIS DIMWIT IN FRONT OF YOU. inhale exhale inhale exhale
“aw, is oikawa gonna try beating ushiwaka in quidditch again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”
way to be mature
poor oikawa tho you pressed a wrong button so he just leaves silently
you kinda regret it after
so this year goes like the last and so does the next
“arent you tired?? of competing with oikawa all the time??” your friend semi asked you
“kind of”
“then stop?? you dont have to fulfill your mom’s high school revenge lmao”
“ughh eita i know but im too far in”
one time you were out breaking curfew #savage
no but seriously you couldn’t sleep so you thought some fresh air will help, the dorms were super suffocating right now
you were stressed after your mom’s monthly letter
beat oikawa this beat oikawa that
you turn at a corner and you see the man himself, ALSO BREAKING CURFEW
now the both of you are looking at each other like 👁👄👁
“GOD L/N I THOUGHT YOU WERE A TEACHER I NEARLY DIED FROM A HEART ATTACK”
“shush before we both get caught”
“right sorry sorry”
“so what the hell are you doing breaking curfew.”
“what are you doing breaking curfew.”
“i asked you first”
“so?”
“just answer the question, oikawa.”
he looks around, making sure the coast was clear before he motions you over to him and as you walk towards him
you see the door hes standing in front of
he drags you in there and what you see is
a bunch of practice dummies
“yeah i,, practice my spells here at night. contrary to popular belief i’m not a genius like ushiwaka or tobio. i’m flattered you think so, though.”
and youre like he... actually practices?? he is actually human?
“what’s with that look? you wanna join me practice at night?”
“as if-” and then you see the book of spells and you guys aren’t even learning any of this YET. and you are determined not to fall behind oikawa “sure.”
oikawas like pardon?
you: i SAID SURE.
and so now at night you practice spells together
only because you want to beat him as if
the arguing goes down a little because you get caught up in beating each other at who gets to do the spell right first that practice runs super late sometimes and you dont have energy to fight with each other that early
everybodys like ??? huh????
but then you’re back to the usual bs in the afternoon and everybodys like oh okay so the world isnt ending yet
so anyway !! yall are practicing again
you’re pointing your wand at a practice dummy and trying to focus so you dont accidentally do something dumb
"hey why do you hate me so much?”
LITERALLY CATCHES YOU OFF GUARD AND BREAKS YOUR FOCUS
“it’s not because i hit you when we were first years right? it really was an accident i swear-”
“you still remember that?”
“well yeah… because i cant think of any other reason why you don’t like me.”
“um… trying too hard to please my mom, i guess. what about you? why did you try so hard to beat me at everything?” you ask, regaining your focus for the charm
“idk, you never paid attention to me unless i did.”
you scoff, “why? you don’t like me or anything, do you?”
“i do tho??”
he literally said that just before you chanted the spell and you got caught off guard and
“stupefy!”
it almost hits oikawa
oikawa: WHAT DID I DO
you: SHITHEAD DONT SAY THAT WHEN IM ABOUT TO DO SOMETHFIBEFH
“HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN???”
“I DONT KNOW IT WAS FUN COMPETING WITH YOU WHEN WE WERE SECOND YEARS AND IT JUST DID?? I TRIED SO HARD SO I CAN IMPRESS YOU AND I GUESS MY PLAN BACKFIRED BECAUSE I DONT THINK YOU LIKE ME VERY MUCH”
now youre staring at each other and you’re both red
he kinda quiets down “and you’re a better rival than ushijima anyway. i don’t mean any of the stuff i said, i swear. i know you don’t like me but i just needed to let that out or i will go insane.”
and hes just looking down all shy
at this point you actually dont know if you like oikawa or not
i mean??? you spent like 3 years butting heads with this dude
and he liked you the whole time?? hes crazy this man is crazy.
maybe you were just in denial the whole time
because?? you could’ve stopped competing with him at everything
maybe you did enjoy it somehow
he did make your life at school interesting
“let’s go out on a few dates and we’ll see.”
his head just whips up and his eyes like light up and hes so EXCITED
in the time before you officially started dating
you find out from iwaizumi that even tho he smiles at a lot of girls its actually rarely genuine the only girl hes ever seen oikawa smile about genuinely was you
and that his mom actually didnt approve of him playing quidditch at first because he had a bad knee but he pushed for it because he really wanted to
he has like a smug and a flippant demeanor but hes very attentive and super caring !!
hes super passionate and hard working at what he does and
i guess now you finally realize you are falling
it takes five dates until the two of you officially start going out
if you tell third year you that you were dating oikawa she would never believe it but here you are, walking to class with him
when the two of you walked in the classroom talking
like TALKING NORMALLY AND NOT THE USUAL “i will choke you in your sleep” “ooh, kinda k-” “don’t”
it was already sus when the arguing toned down a bit but now that its like. REALLY GONE?? everybody is so confused
LMFAO matsukawa asks like “what happened?? are you guys broken?”
“no???”
“how rude! dearest y/n and i are dating now!”
everybody in this class: see now thats crazy. that is crazy.
makki: maybe we didnt hear him right. say that again oikawa
oikawa: me and y/n are dating.
everybody: oh okay bc we thought you said you and l/n were dat- WAIT SO YOU AND L/N REALLY ARE TOGETHER??? 
you: unfortunately
oikawa: h-hey :((((
everybody: SO WE DONT GOTTA LISTEN TO YALL ARGUE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING??? YOU HAVE TO TREAT THE WHOLE CLASS TO BUTTERBEER I THINK WE DESERVE IT AFTER THESE THREE YEARS OF CONSTANT YELLING
nobody was as SHOCKED as your moms
“y/n, baby, i know i did not just hear you say you’re dating the oikawa kid. repeat that for momma again.”
“i’m dating the oikawa kid.”
like?? MOM THIS WAS TECHNICALLY UR FAULT
“so toru, what did you wanna tell me?”
“i have a girlfriend now! her name is y/n l/n.”
“l/n? surely not THAT l/n’s daughter, right?”
“oh it is that l/n.”
when your families have dinner together for the first time
THE TENSION LMFAO
but they do try hard to get along. they try super hard.
they start getting along because MAN YOU AND OIKAWA WERE SOO CUTE AND THEY WANT YOU TO GET MARRIED AND THEY HAVE TO GET ALONG IF THEY WANT IT TO HAPPEN. THEIR GRANDKIDS ARE GONNA BE SO CUTE!!!
“ma, we haven’t graduated yet-”
your mom, ignoring you: THEYRE GOING TO HAVE THE CUTEST HAIR
oikawa’s mom: AND THEY’RE GOING TO BE SUPER SMART LIKE THEIR PARENTS!
your mom: AND WE’LL BE THE BEST GRANDMAS.
momma oiks: PERIOD!
steals your books from you in the halls so he can carry it for you
you tease each other with pet names and shit???
he’ll try to kiss your cheek in the hall but iwa grabs the back of his robe and pulls him away “you’re gross”
“you’re just jealous iwa!!”
when your houses arent playing each other, he goes to your games and vice versa!
tries to distract you in the field
“hey beautiful”
“toru don’t or i will make iwa knock you off your broom.”
“you're so mean”
so anyways yall r couple goals
"listen well, kindaichi, kunimi, your senior is showing you how to get girls.”
kunimi, without looking up from his book: what are you gonna teach us? accidentally slap the girl and get her to hate you for three years while you secretly pine over her during that time before confessing that you liked her the whole time and you go out on five dates and officially start dating? too much work
oikawa: LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT
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ready-to-obeyme · 4 years ago
Text
[OM!] (American) College!AU Demon Brothers
Scenario: Headcanons on the demon brothers as college students (specifically in the US because I don’t know how college works elsewhere), their possible majors, career goals, extracurriculars, ~GPA~ and whatever else I could think of + how meet you in college
Note: I’m hoping to do a Part 2 with the Undateables but honestly… we’ll see lol. This is based off something ~A~ and I thought of for our specific university but we’ve made it broad enough to share HAHA this turned out VERY long
Lucifer
Majoring in Political Sciences with a minor in Psychology
Pre-Law-- most likely immigration law or child custody (there’s definitely a backstory here)
Initially went to community college for the first two years to save up money to take care of his younger siblings
Rejected an offer to go to an Ivy League because it was too expensive; if his siblings ever found out they’d be furious that he’d give up on that chance, but he knows he can succeed wherever he goes (and besides, family is first) 
Transferred into a 4-year university his junior year 
Very high GPA-- VERY
In a professional fraternity with Diavolo and Barbatos 
He didn’t think he’d join one either but Diavolo was the vice chair when he transferred in and the president the year after so… ~nepotism?~ and also Lucifer is charming as heck so no surprise he’d get in
Also rooms with Diavolo and Barbatos
Goes to the gym regularly just to keep fit; gets goaded by Diavolo and Satan into joining an IM team with his frat brothers and actual brothers-- probably basketball or flag football
Probably meets you at a interclub council meeting and mutters under his breath how useless the board members are and you overhear 
“Never have I met more incompetent people.”
“Lmao mood”
“!!!”
Keeps sitting next to you at every interclub meeting then after because at least there’s someone that can keep his mind stimulated (thinks you’re hot if you’re competent btw)
If you somehow meet him on campus, he’s the type of guy to put his hand up and pretend he didn’t see you (just kidding, he always ends up saying hi anyways) 
Will Absolutely Lecture You if you are procrastinating on studying especially if your midterm is, like, TOMORROW
Always ends up studying with him because he’s actually focused on studying and glares at you if you get distracted (but hey you get good scores in the end)
Mammon
Majoring in Business Econ/Economics, Minoring in Statistics
(always ends up in the middle of the “is econ a humanities or a STEM major” debate that leaves him left for dead) 
Planning to work in Business as Finance -- probably has been treasurer or finance director for a club; can even see him being a banker if it suits his plans better
Goes to a four-year university
Decent GPA (or Lucifer would absolutely destroy him), and does REALLY well in mathematics classes
Would room with Lucifer and his posse if they all go to the same school 
Probably in a Business Frat as well because he’s pretty charismatic when it comes down to it but  was an RA for some of his years for the free rooming and dining hall privileges 
Is a very chill and understanding RA (as in he smokes weed with you when he’s off-duty) but is surprisingly well-versed in dealing with roommate issues
Works part-time (gasp) to buy stuff off of Amazon and go out to places 
Spends a lot of time exploring places with his friends, going hiking, rock-climbing, clubbing-- which is expensive, as it turns out, so he needed to be able to afford it somehow
Meets you when you’re eating your lunch outside somewhere and he asks you if you have a dollar he could borrow for a vending machine snack
You exchange numbers with him so he can pay it back (even though you honestly don’t really need it, but why not) and turns out he’s in your GE class
“Heyyy wassup! So glad I have a friend in this class” 
“Oh by the way, did you finish the homework? Haha, I forgot it.” 
Mammon always repays you for your help in food though so you aren’t complaining
Leviathan
Majoring in Computer Sciences
And honestly that’s too much for me already-- the man is doing computer programming, coding-- WHEW-- and they do NOT rest
Goes to a community college but honestly has no problems cinching internships. The computer is his domain-- online applications are EASY, doing projects NOT as easy, interviews? HARD-- REALLY HARD (someone help him)
Probably intends to work with a big company like Google if only to help supply his income so he can live his life going to AX and buying merch 
Most likely moved out of his house mid-college with his online friends (who are luckily compatible with him living-space wise) and visits home once a week 
There’s two potential sides you can meet first: 
Either you meet him at a convention and you both gush about the same character and anime and somehow find each other online (not college related) 
Or his favorite Ruri-chan keychain gets broken off in the computer lab, and you’re the one running after him to give it him
He may or may not owe you his life after that (and if you enjoy anime, well that’s a bonus)
Both of these meetings can happen if he doesn’t recognize you in class because you were in cosplay-- imagine the surprise
The two of you as friends are MASTER PROCRASTINATORS at every assignment the two of you have-- so low-key not a great influence-- but you have fun together watching animes, playing games, talking about life-- anything but actual work 
Always ends up scrambling to finish things-- but he keeps doing it because it’s been working for him so far
You help him prepare for interviews because he’s always nervous before each one regardless of how well his application looks
Satan
Majoring in Comparative Literature AND Anthropology (ya boy is doing the whole nine yards)
Planning to get his Master’s and then a PhD in one of his majors (whichever proves to be more engaging for him)-- visibly excited to become a Professor
College was meant for Satan-- like REALLY; the man is in LOVE with learning; most likely to go and be accepted to an Ivy-League after Lucifer but... truly believes you can get a good education anywhere so it depends on his financial standing (and how much scholarship he gets)
Does get a little disgruntled when his classes aren’t available but doesn’t mind learning something new-- if the professor bores him to death, he’ll read the book
Really good at tutoring people; someone suggests that he works as a peer-learning facilitator/writing tutor and he does-- might as well make bank doing something you always do anyways   
Joins a writing/journal club as an extracurricular and a club that provides tutoring services to the underserved community-- surprisingly good with kids!
He knows friends in high places, so if he wanted to, could get into any party without batting an eye and his favorite professors love him
Spends a lot of his time going out to the city and exploring places, similarly to Mammon, rock-climbing, hiking, paragliding-- anything
He is VERY well-rounded as you can see; competes with Lucifer to see whose GPA is better though
You probably meet him during office hours, and you can only stare in awe as he asks questions that you had in mind, but better; if you’re visibly confused about something, he’ll take his time to help you too (it’s habit at this point)
Ask him for his contact info and you’ll get it, and maybe repay him in coffee? (You always see him at the cafe on campus.) 
Most likely to have a specific spot in a cafe that he is always at that the workers actually save a spot for him or give him his usual order before he even arrives-- may or may not have helped them edit their essays or with their homework as a thank-you so you KNOW they’ll love him forever
The type of person to help you make flashcards and cram if you need it
Asmodeus
Majoring in Dance and Fine Arts (I HC going to NYU specifically)
Considering going for an Master of Fine Arts degree but he might just move to New York and go for being a Broadway Star
College is mainly just training for him and hoping to land gigs in local theater-- and the university theater if there is one-- and building his resume for his big break 
Has SO many extracurriculars, all pertaining to his career choice, but also because he enjoys what he does: drama, competitive dance team, acapella, fashion design
Makes an unbelievable amount of friends, incredibly good at networking
The first time you saw him was when he was performing for a local theater and you were in love with his performance, and the next time you saw him in the hallway of a classroom building, you told him how much you enjoyed it
Always accepts compliments about his looks with grace, but there’s something about truly being admired for his acting and singing that has him preening
Invites you to come out to his next performance, and if not his, then to another play-- and it can be a date, but up to you ;) 
The man is the KING of Multiple Talents and has big dreams to match 
Always finds a way to hang out with you and drag you to every club that he can use his fake-id for (and when he’s actually 21 and above, gets a little offended that he doesn’t get ID’d) 
A night in the town with you is always a good night! 
Sometimes when he has practical exams coming up, he asks you to watch him perform-- and he likes your compliments but actually takes getting all the moves seriously so you better pay attention!
Most likely to move far away to reach his dreams, but he would take you with him if he could-- his little star
Beelzebub
Majoring in Physiological Sciences
Pre-Nursing or Pre-Sports Medicine 
He’s a little undecided, but he’s definitely going to go into the health field because he likes the idea of being able to use his strength to help others
Gets a scholarship from the university because he’s part of the football team, which is actually pretty hard on him because Fall Semester/Quarter he has to keep skipping classes for games  
Always brings a snack to eat with him during lecture-- and is not afraid to bring his entire lunch and make it right in the front row, though he tends to stick to the back because they tend to have electrical plugs 
You most likely meet him during lecture: he offers you an entire sandwich (not a chip bag, not fruit snacks, an entire LUNCH) because he heard your stomach growl during class 
From then on, you collect notes for him when he’s gone from games and even go to games if you aren’t usually the type to just to see how he’s doing; it’s hard trying to find you among the huge bleachers, but he always asks you where you’re sitting anyways 
Really appreciate it if you help him study into late at night because it IS hard balancing sports and academics 
He most likely doesn’t really have any time for anything else so he usually makes up for it during the rest of the year when training is less to volunteer in the hospital or at the gym as a personal trainer 
If you ask him to teach you how to properly lift weights, he’ll definitely help out and the both of you can work out together-- though you feel bad when he has to add four extra weights to each side after you finish your reps
Belphegor
Majoring in Computer Graphics/Animation
Intending to go into making animation or game design-- is one of the brothers who doesn’t really know exactly what he wants to do yet because he’s afraid that doing what he loves as a job will ruin it for him
His family reassures him that they’ll support him whether or not he continues with his path in life, but he’s considering art school and then taking internships in places so he has a better idea on what he wants
Most likely to sell his own original work and become a full-time artist regardless
I think you already know how you meet him-- he’s sleeping in a lecture hall-- either against the wall or on the small piece of wood they call a desk when class ends and he’s still sleeping; and you wake him up 
Sleepily thanks you and continues to sleep through every class that you wake him up to; when you ask him why he doesn’t just go home and sleep, he tells you he’s too lazy to walk back and forth from his dorm/apartment to campus (mood) 
When you add each other on Snapchat or something, he sends you pics of ‘places to nap’ on campus
You always end up studying together because he’s actually pretty good at understanding lecture stuff despite not being awake for most of it-- apparently he’s used to teaching himself 
Will make you art for your birthday and will vehemently refuse payment so he just tells you to take him out for dinner instead 
If you talk about how you’re not sure on what you want to do in life too, he’ll probably say ‘mood’ but is most likely to encourage you to do whatever you want to do in life too 
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