#It's been 39 days of so much rendering | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

crescencestudio · 8 months ago

Text

๋࣭⭑ Devlog #39 | 3.27.24 ๋࣭⭑

Happy March!!

This devlog is going to be a bit shorter, but...... it's for Exciting Reasons that I will share later in the post. heh.....heh.....HEH.....

Let's jump in ^^

This month, writing was mostly dedicated to Etza's route! We have officially entered the Developmental Editing part of Etza's route, which is super exciting!!!

There were parts of Etza's route I wasn't completely satisfied with, so I spent a lot of this month tinkering, adding, fleshing out, editing, etc. for their route. I'm happier with it now compared to where it was when we entered this month, and especially with Wudgey's help, I'm excited for Etza to get the love they deserve!

I had a small, optional goal for myself to start Kuna'a's route, but honestly, I felt like between work with the Enhanced Demo, Etza's edits, and just generally feeling a bit tired after being Super Productive in January and February, I decided to give myself a break. That being said, I'm relatively confident I'll be getting started with Kuna'a's route next month, and I'm excited to dive into their route (and the Fae routes in general, teehee!).

Vui is on the very last of the BGs I need from him..... So I am in mourning.......

Kidding but not kidding. Vui has done an amazing job of putting the backgrounds for Alaris together! They're absolutely stunning, and by the time we get to the next devlog, he will have finished ALL of the BGs for Alaris! It's been about a year and a half in the making, which is kinda crazy to think we have been together for this long (and working on the full game for this long), but it's definitely A Moment.

In celebration of him reaching this milestone, I wanted to highlight some of the BGs he's made for the game! The theme is early morning; some of these BGs are in the demo, and some are in the full game hehe. You'll have to guess the context of the mysterious full game BGs :')

Sneak Peek: BG Showcase, morning strolls around the world of Alaris

I also thought it's been a while since I showcased a CG here. While I don't play on showcasing many of the full game CGs on public devlogs (I do show them on my Patreon!), I wanted to show a little snippet of this specific CG.

Why, you ask? Well, for the OGs, you might remember I showed a sketch of the CG during the Alaris Kickstarter---whenever the hell THAT THING happened.

I finished rendering it now that I got the BG for it, so I wanted to show a peek of that sketch that I showed oh-so-many-years ago.

Sneak Peek: Kayn Full Route CG I want to lick him

Generally for art progress, I've been working on CGs as well as some promotional materials, which I'll be getting to in the next section \o/

Now for the Exciting News!!!!

I have two bits of exciting news. The first is...

Sneak Peek: Selection Screen for Alpha/Beta Access (OUUUUGGGGGHHHHH)

I STARTED CODING KAYN'S ROUTE!!!! The first act is already "done" and ready for beta access. And I'm hoping to finish the other two acts within the next couple of weeks. It is crazy to finally be able to code some of the full game routes. Even if they're not at the "final version" or early access stage, it is Extremely Rewarding to finally experience the scripts I've been writing in the game!!! With the CGs.... Extended Screens..... Just seeing the script with visual assets and not just a Google Doc is SOOOOO FSEIKLFJSEILE

Sneak Peek: Chapter Character Cards (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA)

The second piece of Exciting News is that I have a release date for the Enhanced Demo. YEEEEAAAAAA. It's finally happening!!! Please stay tuned over the next couple of days...... An Exciting Announcement is on its way...................................

I didn't do much market research this month. If I'm being honest, I actually struggled a little bit this month with like...... burnout and workaholism guilt. I wanted to take a break after getting the demo ready for public release, but I just couldn't bring myself to fully rest. It felt like there was so much to do (not just with Alaris, but also with real world/work obligations) and all these looming deadlines was starting to get to me.

I'm hoping next month because I'll actually be Releasing the demo (oops, sneak peek of general release date teehee!), I'll be able to feel like I can take a break. But it also sucks a bit that I feel like I have to Earn It. I think with Alaris being a Kickstarter project, I want to get the game in your hands as soon as possible, but of course it's not to anyone's benefit if I burn myself out in the process and end up with either a worser project or taking even longer to finish it.

I did...... start Stardew Valley again since it is the ultimate dissociation/break game for me. So far it's been working! But we'll see how it continues <3

LOOK AT MY FARM!!!

Should I marry Sebastian or Elliot.

Anyways, hope you all have a great rest of your month, and I'll talk to you Very Soon with an Exciting Announcement! <3

#alaris #devlog

49 notes · View notes

lonestarflight · 1 year ago

Text

Skylab Missions: Skylab 3

"These three men are the prime crewmen for the Skylab 3 mission. Pictured in the one-G trainer Multiple Docking Adapter (MDA) at the Johnson Space Center (JSC) are, left to right, scientist-astronaut Owen K. Garriott, science pilot; and astronauts Jack R. Lousma and Alan L. Bean, pilot and commander, respectively."

Mission Duration: July 28 - September 25, 1973

Time Duration: 58 days, 15 hours, 39 minutes, 42 seconds

"The Skylab 3 mission started out as routine, but was not without in-flight high drama of its own. Shortly after docking and entering the Orbital Workshop (OWS), all three crew members experienced motion sickness, delaying the activation of OWS on-board equipment.

A more serious concern was raised on Mission Day-5 (MD-5). An apparent failure of two of the four thruster quadrants of the Command Service Module (CSM) reaction control system was detected.

Not only could an actual failure like this create an early end to the mission, it also could conceivably render the CSM incapable of supporting a safe return of the astronauts to Earth.

Launch crews at the Kennedy Space Center were placed on a 24-hour per-day, seven day per-week work schedule to prepare the Skylab 4 Saturn IB launch vehicle for flight in case an early launch was needed for a rescue operation."

The Skylab 4 Saturn IB (CSM-118/SA-208) launch vehicle is rolled to Launch Complex 39, Pad B.

"A decision was made to continue the mission, and although the Skylab 4 launch vehicle had been rushed to flight-readiness, the CSM performed flawlessly during re-entry operations.

On August 6, 1973 astronauts Garriott and Lousma performed a spacewalk which lasted 6 hours, 31 minutes. During this spacewalk, the astronauts were able to extend an external twin-pole thermal shield to replace the parasol thermal shield installed by the Skylab 2 crew. They also retrieved and replaced film from solar telescopes housed outside the OWS.

A second spacewalk by astronauts Garriott and Lousma was conducted on August 24, 1973. This one lasted 4 hours, 31 minutes. During this spacewalk, the astronauts retrieved and replaced film from solar telescopes housed outside the OWS and installed a cable for a new rate gyro package. They also performed some maintenance activities.

The third and final spacewalk of the mission was conducted on September 22, 1973. This one was conducted by astronauts Bean and Garriott and lasted 2 hours, 41 minutes. During this spacewalk, the astronauts retrieved and replaced film from solar telescopes housed outside the OWS and performed maintenance activities on other external experiment packages.

Scientific experiments, including the observation of unanticipated dynamic solar activity, continued for much of the 59-day mission. The crew participated in classroom-oriented educational demonstrations regarding weightlessness.

The Skylab 3 crew set a new manned space flight endurance record. Their in-flight health fared markedly better than the Skylab 2 crew, with the exception of the amount of bone calcium loss.

A significant demonstration of long-term space flight and the long-term viability of the OWS was successfully achieved."

* Due to a NASA management error, crewed Skylab mission patches were designed in conflict with the official mission numbering scheme.

An interesting side note, the wives created their version of the patch. I've covered the NSFW bits just so the Tumblr staff doesn't mark my blog as NSFW.

"The main feature on the second Skylab crew patch was Leonardo da Vinci's universal man, slightly retouched to make it 'G-rated'! Without their husbands knowledge, the astronaut wives also had a patch made which was a joke version of the official crew patch. The universal man figure had been replaced by a 'universal woman'. Instead of the astronauts names; Bean, Garriott and Lousma, their wives first names were shown: Sue, Helen-Mary and Gratia. The crew first became aware of the wives patch when they found stickers of them in their lockers on board Skylab."

source, source

NASA ID: S72-51123, S73-28714, 72-HC-90, SL3-108-1288, SL3-109-1345, S74-15583, SL3-111-1505, S73-34369, SL3-117-2109

114 notes · View notes

mithliya · 1 year ago

Note

Bro killed an abusive piece of shit and everyone is talking about ‘what a tragedy it is’ smh….this guy was beating the shit out of his sister and he thought she was dead, no wonder he did what he did

Simon Birch killing: Adam Jenkins jailed for Newbottle manslaughter https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-66221528

Simon Birch killing: Adam Jenkins jailed for Newbottle manslaughter

A man who killed his sister's violent boyfriend at the end of a Christmas Day party has been jailed for eight years.

Simon Birch, 39, was fatally wounded in the neck at the home of Adam Jenkins in Newbottle, Sunderland, at about 23:20 GMT on 25 December 2021.

Jenkins, 36, was cleared of murder but found guilty of manslaughter by a Newcastle Crown Court jury.

Mr Birch's family said he was beating his "demons" and his devastating death had "stolen the joy of Christmas".

Jurors were told Mr Birch had been in a relationship with Jenkins' sister Emma for two-and-a-half years and there had been multiple incidents of domestic abuse and violence.

The couple were invited to Jenkins' home to celebrate Christmas with the rest of the family, but at the end of the party Mr Birch launched a violent attack on his girlfriend.

Jenkins had told jurors he believed Mr Birch had killed his sister after multiple punches left her unconscious and bleeding on the living room floor.

He said he had got locked in the kitchen while Mr Birch was pushed outside, but he could still hear shouting and screaming which made him fear for the rest of his family.

Jenkins, who ran a successful bricklaying agency, said he could not remember picking up three knives from the kitchen but assumed he would have done so to arm himself, Ms Jenkins and his partner Natalie Shaw against further attacks from Mr Birch.

He also said he could not remember inflicting the fatal wound in the driveway but did recall trying to perform CPR on Mr Birch.

Prosecutor Francis FitzGibbon KC said the "large family gathering" had been a "very happy occasion" with "people enjoying themselves", although there appeared to have been an "undercurrent of unpleasantness" and "tension" between Mr Birch and Ms Jenkins during the day.

He said a number of people drank a lot of alcohol during the day including Mr Birch, who was found after his death to be more than three times the drink drive legal limit which rendered him "vulnerable".

In statements read to court, Mr Birch's two teenage daughters said they had been devastated by his death.

They said while a lot of the focus in the trial had been on his "negative" parts, including his drug abuse and violence, there was much more to him than that.

They said he was "loving and generous" and would do anything to help anybody, adding he made his family feel "loved and protected".

Mr Birch's mother, Jennifer, said he had "brought love and laughter" into the family and had a passion for motorbikes, football and music.

She said life was "never dull" when he was around and he had the "strength to beat his demons".

Mrs Birch said her son's killing had "stolen some of the joy" of Christmas.

Jeremy Dein KC, representing Jenkins, read parts of a letter written to the court in which the killer said he was "truly and utterly sorry".

He said his client left school at 16 and "worked tirelessly" to build a successful bricklaying agency employing dozens of people and apprentices, adding he was a "man who gave to society in so many different ways".

He said "regrettably" Mr Birch had played a "pivotal part" in the "tragic situation" as he had "launched an unprovoked and violent attack on the Jenkins family that evening".

In a letter sent to the judge, Emma Jenkins talked of her "ongoing love" and "fear" of her partner, adding she thought he might have killed her that night.

Mr Dein said Ms Jenkins was "overcome with guilt" about bringing Mr Birch into a "hard-working, decent and honest family" and "feels strongly she is responsible" for her brother's incarceration.

The Honourable Mrs Justice Alison Foster said Mr Birch was a "young vigorous man" who "had much of his life before him".

The judge said Mr Birch was "very much loved and dreadfully missed" with the date of his death adding "extra poignancy".

She said she was "sure" Jenkins did not intend to seriously harm or kill Mr Birch and had "genuine horror and surprise" that he died.

The judge said Jenkins was a "peaceable man" of "excellent character" who tended to avoid confrontation but on Christmas night wanted to get Mr Birch away from his family "knowing what he was capable of".

his mom saying her abuser son had the "strength to beat his demons"... uh maam the only thing he used his strength to beat was his girlfriend!

if i saw a man beating my sister up until she was unconscious, i might react similarly. it sucks that his daughters are left fatherless, but i don't think the brother of jenkins is in the wrong for attacking a man after he thought his sister was murdered in front of his eyes. the only family i feel sorry for is the family who dealt with their daughter being severely abused by her boyfriend and another one of their children being jailed for defending his sister from her abuser.

#what a monster.

18 notes · View notes

1800duckhotline · 1 year ago

Note

OC questions! Kuobakhaya for 34, 39,30 and B!

Uncommon OC questions

34. How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt?

Very difficult. Kuobakhaya has a very hard time not feeling guilty about a lot of things, even stupid ones, both when she does need to feel guilty and when she doesn't. Being a recovering drug addict brings with herself a huge baggage of things and a lot of guilt regarding several different things, be it not being a good friend, not being a good enough girlfriend, not being pretty enough/in shape enough (body dysmorphia as a result of her eating disorder), not being funny enough, people not liking her enough in general, not being good enough at recovering, not being grateful enough to Tisha (even though he really doesn't ask for anything besides her trying to be ok!) and so forth.

She makes an effort not to let it shake her up too much but there are days the guilt will eat at her for hours. It is definitely going to be a long time before she will fully be able to handle it, but as it is now, it is very hard for her to do that.

39. How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people?

Honestly... ridiculously easy... For an example, personal history aside, the reason she was able to befriend Tisha the way she did when they were children was that Kuobakhaya very very easily will overlook people's faults and flaws, even when it is not beneficial to her or when she knows that they will end up causing her problems one way or another. This hasn't been the case with Tisha specifically, but with many other people she has met it was.

While she doesn't cut slack for her family, who she misses but doesn't regret leaving behind (I have to decide still if I want her to have a brother or two) when she moved to the UK she ended up befriending a lot of untrustworthy folk who took advantage of the fact that she was desperate to fit in and wanted to become as "cool" as possible as the other youngsters were. (She moved with Tisha to the UK when they were approximately barely 18, so they both had no clue what they were doing, just enough budget to rent a dingy apartment and Lots Of Dreams) So, in England Kuobakhaya unfortunately has ignored many people's many many grave flaws due to her being very desperate for some kind of approval, and her drug addiction (heroin) certainly did not help her feel any better even if she felt it did at the time. This unstable period of her life was rendered further chaotic by her awful three ex-boyfriends which in different ways made her life A Good Amount Hell, which I won't get into right now but you have to believe me that dumping each of them individually required Bakhya to build up a lot of courage and she gradually ended up raising her standards little by little.

Even back in their hometown, Bakhya ended up frequenting shady folks - one of the reasons she decided to leave her family behind was exactly because they'd found out about her drug addiction, which at the time was cocaine. Both her and Tisha unfortunately developed addictions when they were both pretty young (the living conditions weren't optimal for either and she used as an excuse the fact she was mourning for the loss of her family pet, which at the time she considered to be her only real friend). This partly also explains why she has a difficult relationship when it comes to her self worth and why she often let others walk over her hoping they would "approve" of her in some way or another. Obviously there is other factors at hand as well.

For reference at the age of 28 (when I usually draw her) to 30 she is actually getting help for her heroin addiction and annexed mental ailments that come from them (principally eating disorders) so she is on her way to recovery, though it is Not easy obviously. But even in a more stable state of mind Bakhya tends to blame herself before she recognizes others' flaws...

30. Who do they most regret meeting?

A lot of people... Though probably most of all she regrets meeting the second of her 3 exes because dealing with him made her psychic ailments a thousand times worse.

It was the kind of toxic situation where Bakhya was desperate for any kind of attention and ended up going to any length to try and make him happy, but unfortunately was not able to do so (the guy was just an asshole full of shit) even when she went as far as to dye her hair blonde since he liked to repeat "how much he likes blonde girls" out loud when she was around.

She knows he was a piece of shit now, but being around him only contributed to making her situation back then worse both with self-esteem, mental health, and drugs, so she will always feel remorse over having considered going out with him at all. Probably the only person in the world she actively always wishes harm against.

B) What inspired you to create them?

This issss a great question! I don't remember actually. Before I decided to rehaul her, Kuobakhaya used to be "Joan", and I made Joan all the way back in 2016 now I think. Crazy to think that it's been 9 years since I've had this OC and only now decided to give her a proper well-rounded revision. I've had to change a lot of things about her.

I think I made her not long after watching Trainspotting, I think, and I was really fascinated with the complexity of characters that are afflicted by addictions, as well as how complicated drugs can make one's life in like, real life, not just in movies. I went as far as to thoroughly research every possible symptoms a character like Bakhya's could have, researching the intersection that comes with switching from cocaine to heroin usage, what are the visible tics, the psychological effects, and so forth. I was further inspired to simply let a tulpa of sorts develop in my brain around the "what if she suffered this and that, how would she react, what would her thoughts be" and gradually it just... Happened.

What was really curious is that I made "Joan" before I ever even watched Twin Peaks, as I now consider Laura Palmer one of the inspirations for Kuobakhaya ('she's just like me fr' situation with Bakhya -> Laura) but trust me when I say I saw the show much later than she was created. Obviously Bakhya's story is not at all a carbon copy of Laura Palmer's (because I made her before I knew of Laura's character, but also because I feel it'd be in bad taste?) but the sentiments, the "philosophy" behind the type of character are both there, in a sense...

This question went sort of nowhere I apologize but I was really just inspired by the idea of a woman tortured by the Mundane demons, not supernatural creatures or anything like that, by how drugs can shape a person and feed into their insecurities and really try and feel how that can change them fundamentally; but not only that, I wanted to explore the idea of recovery, finding yourself again, trying to get back on your own feet after years spent trying to "fit" with the "cool crowd". I had a rp blog for the then-Joan, for like, years, you know.

And I decided to give her a little character arc where she went through recovery and everything. I spent so much effort writing it, too, like, it was really extensive (for my standards) and it involved moving blogs and everything just for that really clean slate feeling -- and literally nobody cared about it, like it was straight up ignored by many people who weren't my friends? I remember that moment completely disenchanting me from the oc roleplay community LOL. Anyway.............

#SORRY FOR THE LONG ASS ANSWERRRRR #THANKS THOUGH HEHE..#my darling bakhya. she is so troubled.#oc rambles #ask games #asks

2 notes · View notes

yhwhrulz · 2 months ago

Text

Charles Spurgeon's "Morning & Evening" Devotional: October 4th

Morning

“The Lord of those servants cometh and reckoneth with them.”

Matthew 25:14-30

Still further to warn us of his coming, our Lord delivered the parable of the talents.

Matthew 25:15

We have all some talent. It may be only one, but, we are responsible for it. Are we acting up to the measure of our ability? Many wish they had more talents, but this is wrong, for the Lord has entrusted us with quite as many gifts as we shall be able to give a good account of. Our great concern should be to be found faithful stewards of such things as we have.

Matthew 25:16-18

He probably thought that as he could not do much he would not do anything, and there are thousands of his opinion; they fancy that their little is not needed and will never be missed, and therefore they make no attempt to serve their Lord. Are we of that kind?

Matthew 25:24 , Matthew 25:25

Deep down in all unregenerate hearts there lurks the idea that God is too severe upon poor erring mortals, expecting more of them than is reasonable. Yet, if they think so they ought to be roused to greater carefulness to render to the Lord full obedience; their knowledge of what the Lord demands will make their disobedience the more criminal.

Matthew 25:27

usury or interest

Matthew 25:29

He was not rebellious, but only unprofitable, and that condemned him. How does this solemn truth bear upon us? Let us search and see.

Make haste, O man, to live,

For thou so soon must die;

Time hurries past thee like the breeze;

How swift its moments fly!

Make haste, O man, to live,

Thy time is almost o’er;

Oh, sleep not, dream not, but arise;

The Judge is at the door!

Evening

“Let Thy mercy, O Lord, be upon us.”

Matthew 25:31-46

May our hearts be earnestly attentive while we read our Lord’s own account of the Day of Judgment.

Matthew 25:33

Here we are mixed together, but the keen eye of the Great Shepherd will detect our real characters and place us in one or other of the two flocks into which all mankind will be divided. There will be no middle company, we shall be placed either with saints or sinners in that day. To which do we now belong?

Matthew 25:36

All these are deeds of love; not one of them consists of words, or ceremonial acts. The truest worship of God is charily to the needy: does not the apostle James say, “Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction and to keep himself unspotted from the world.”

Matthew 25:39

They were modest, and had never set so high a value upon their own virtues as to have seen that excellence in them which the Judge had long ago discovered, and which he now declares publicly before men and angels. They had only been kind to poor and afflicted men and women, and were surprised to hear that the Lord regarded their actions as rendered to himself.

Matthew 25:40

How this ennobles charity! “He that giveth to the poor lendeth unto the Lord.” Who would not show kindness to his Redeemer?

Matthew 25:41-43

They were not condemned for what they had done amiss, but for what they had not done. Sins of omission are glaring evidences of want of grace, especially the omission of those duties which common humanity requires of us.

Matthew 25:44

They were self-righteous and had no eye to see their faults. Fain would they have justified themselves. Those who deny their sins may be sure that they are of the goats.

Matthew 25:45 , Matthew 25:46

There is no temporary punishment any more than temporary reward. As sure as heaven is everlasting, so also is hell. Flee, O flee from the wrath to come.

Thou Judge of quick and dead,

Before whose bar severe,

With holy joy or guilty dread,

We all shall soon appear!

Our caution’d souls prepare

For that tremendous day;

And fill us now with watchful care,

And stir us up to pray.

0 notes

jdgo51 · 1 year ago

Text

Struggle and Chaos Today's inspiration comes from: God is With You Every Day by Max Lucado Struggle "'He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”' — Matthew 26:39 "We all struggle. But did you ever think that perhaps God may be using your struggles to change you? To shape you? Even to heal you? For two years I have been asking God to remove the pain in my writing hand. Even as I write these words, I feel stiffness in my thumb, fingers, forearm, and shoulder. The doctors chalk it up to thirty-plus books written in longhand. Over the decades the repeated motion has restricted my movement, rendering the simplest of tasks — writing a sentence on a sheet of paper — difficult. So I do my part. I stretch my fingers. A therapist massages the muscles. I avoid the golf course. I even go to yoga! But most of all I pray. Better said, I argue. Shouldn’t God heal my hand? My pen is my tool. Writing is my assignment. So far He hasn’t healed me. Or has He? These days I pray more as I write. Not eloquent prayers but honest ones. Lord, I need help… Father, my hand is stiff. The discomfort humbles me. I’m not Max, the author. I am Max, the guy whose hand is wearing out. I want God to heal my hand. Thus far He has used my hand to heal my heart. So that thing you’re struggling with, that you’ve prayed about over and over and over again… could it be that God is using it to heal your heart? ~Before Amen That thing you’re struggling with, that you’ve prayed about over and over and over again? God is using it to heal your heart. Chaos Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. — 1 Peter 5:7 NIV Imagine this scene. It is breakfast time, and the family is in chaos. The daughters are complaining about their brother who took too much time in the bathroom. As a result their hair isn’t brushed and makeup isn’t applied. Mom is doing her best to manage the conflict, but she woke up with a headache and a long list of things to do. The clock is ticking like a time bomb, ever closer to that moment when, boom! It’s time to go. Dad stops at the kitchen entryway and surveys the pandemonium. He weighs his options: Command everyone to shape up and behave. Berate his son for dominating the bathroom, his daughters for poor planning, and his wife for not taking control. Sneak out before anyone notices. Or he could turn to God with a simple prayer: Father, You are good. I need help. Reduce the frenzy in my house, please. Will the prayer change everything? It may. Or it may take another prayer, or two, or ten. But at least the problem will be in the hands of the One who can solve it. ~ Before Amen" Excerpted with permission from God Is With You Every Day by Max Lucado, copyright Max Lucado.

0 notes

thisisafuckingassessment · 2 years ago

Text

POST 39

It's been a while...

What is going on? I am exhausted most of the time, but now I'll have 3 days to get my shit together. So what I am doing in my personal project: the prototype of the shirt is basically done I need buttons and I'll remake the collar since I hate it now it's too ugly. I am vectorizing the abstract from Eduardo again, because the one before was just to see on the renders, but now I'd like to send it for print, so it has to be perfect. I've decided that first I'll only make one color (bc it's pricy) and that color will be the red one, because it's the original one as Edu made it, and I decided to stick with his decision and don't change it.

My plan before finishing the master: - finish personal project - finish the ux google course (that I started a year ago and there is not much left to finish) - make a portfolio: this needs a lot of work. All of my previous works needs a review. - make changes on reflection book and process book, and decide which indicators need to be changed completely before project L starts, so I'll know what I still need to complete. - Make process book more detailed, previous works I can already do it.

0 notes

keefwho · 2 years ago

Text

March 02 - 2023

8:13 AM

I apologize to myself for sounding so CRINGE but my heart feels like a fire that ranges in intensity. The past few days it’s been the most barely lit candle but I know how hot it can get. It will get roaring again.

I think becoming more in touch with my memories and experiences could help me realize my potential for growth. It’s hard to describe my relationship with my memories lately but it’s like they didn’t happen or are completely irrelevant to me. I used to put a lot more stake into them and I thought it was a problem. I’m noticing I do that with a lot of things. I believe myself to be on the extreme end of something so I end up pushing myself to the opposite extreme instead of finding some middle ground.

2:45 PM

I’m starting to see a little hope. I’m likening what I’m going through right now to what I went through in June when I confronted my anxiety. When I did that, there was no more hiding from it. It was at the forefront of my mind non-stop. I HAD to deal with it or I’d keep suffering. It took a lot of work but I made a lot of progress. I think right now I’m confronting my self worth/meaning in a way that is rendering it much harder to hide from. I’m constantly thinking “What am I worth?” “What am I doing?” “Why am I doing it?” and it’s miserable. I’m struggling to feel meaning in anything right now but I’m aware it’s because I’m out of touch with my values. My way of improving that right now is to make sure I’m not falling into the same exact routine, I’m trying to break my own rules a little. I’m also trying not to hold back from anything I feel an inclination towards. I often want to stream on Twitch but I usually don’t for “reasons.” With stuff like that, I should start ignoring those reasons and just do it because I’ll enjoy myself. I have very little other direction right now. I’m sure I’ll find my way but it will be long and hard.

Maybe I’m still not as open with my emotions as I think. I might be suppressing them still, but it different ways. I’ve opened up a lot to feeling certain things but I think I limit how strongly I allow myself to feel in general. This behavior stems from so many “negative” outcomes to strong emotions. An obvious example would be anger while playing a game. I think most people know it’s easy for that to get out of hand but the solution isn’t to cut it out altogether. I miss feeling tested in pvp based games. I’ve had my fair share of getting a little TOO mad but I don’t want that to stop me from feeling a healthy amount of anger.

I also try to limit feelings of happiness just in case I can’t replicate whats making me happy or things come crashing down. I can’t think of one emotion I don’t limit because an extreme form of it can lead to undesirable circumstances. For a long time reaching a neutral and steady state in anything seemed like a good idea but for a long time I’ve known it’s not. Things seem best enjoyed when there is fluctuation, ups and down. I’m going to try to engage with stronger emotions and not avoid things I know will trigger them.

3:39 PM

I know I think too much about this. Maybe I should take a break. CONSTANT thought into stuff like this gets kinda reverby over time. And it means I’m not able to put some of the stuff I said into practice. Less thinking, more feeling tonight. And I gotta remember to defuse from negative self talk.

11:44 PM

I really am afraid this will be a long term problem. It’s a good thing but it’ll be a very difficult fight I imagine, just like fighting my anxiety. I really wish I had someone to talk to about it right now, I just want to get it off my chest. I’m afraid. Having to change so much is so scary and I need my friends through this.

I have to trust that I’m not alone. I think I sometimes lose faith in others because I’m trying not to get so close or reliant just in case they let go of me. I want to trust the people I know are always there and that they love me. I want to be close to them. I want to stop avoiding close connections.

0 notes

lovelyladyabsinthewrites · 3 years ago

Text

Love Song For a Vampire Pt.2

Pairing(s): Edward Cullen x Wolf!Reader, Edward Cullen x Bella Swan, Embry Call x Wolf!Reader, Jacob Black x Bella Swan

Warnings: Definitely angsty, pining, imprinting, established relationships, hardcore rejection

Words: 2050

Summary: Your packmates are quick to discover who you had just imprinted on.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37 Part 38 Part 39 Part 40(series finale)

They swarmed in from all sides like locusts; a plague of fur and snarling teeth. You were rendered down to your belly, unable to function anymore.

It felt like you were dying.

‘It’s not possible.’ Seth’s voice was quiet, uncertain as he crept from in between two trees. His head was low, a slight twitch on his muzzle as he wasn’t sure if he should growl or not.

‘Imprinting on a vampire?!’ Jared snaps at Edward.

They could all hear your pain. Even feel it. That was the thing about pack mentality. Anything intense, the others felt it as well.

Leah however wasn’t as cautious and leapt at Edward who is quick to step away. She was all snaps and growls. The hair on the back of her spine was completely erect as her ears were flicked back dangerously.

‘Leave, bloodsucker.’ Her voice was clear and vicious. ‘Your kind has already caused enough damage.’

You feel Seth’s nose nudge against you, letting out a small whimper as he tries to comfort you.

Dark brows scrunched together and honey eyes gazing at you with helplessness. “I’m sorry.” He’s slow in turning back to his side of the forest. Back to his part of the town.

Not sure if watching him go was more painful than him staying and looking at you with pity, you cry even more as your chest continued to hurt.

“I know it must be painful. I can’t even imagine how you feel. The only time I felt such pain was when. . . Was when I lost my temper and hurt Emily.”

It was weird hearing someone speak after isolating yourself in your room for so long. Everything after your encounter with Edward was such a haze. You didn’t keep track of the days and refused to go out except for school. Even then you were still doing poorly in your classes as you were unable to focus. Jacob had tried to talk to you several times about it. But his words went in one ear and out the other.

You just wanted to be alone.

As the alpha of the pack, Sam took it upon himself to try and get you out of your stupor.

Keeping your back to him you continue to stare at your wall that was riddled with pictures of every size. Swollen, tired, eyes burn as you stare at a particular picture.

“God. . . No one knew it was possible. . .” You hear your computer chair creak as Sam shifts his body in it. It was probably way too small for his bulky body most likely making him uncomfortable to sit in any position. “You know, there are some theories as to why we imprint on the people we do.” Sam goes on with a lowered voice, calm and so much like an older sibling. “The theory is that maybe shape-shifters imprint on the person who they have the best chance to reproduce with and make strong descendants with. A. . . A child between you and Edward would be the strongest of us all.”

“He doesn’t want me. He has Bella. He loves Bella.” Damn it still hurt to event think about it.

“Imprinting has never been wrong.” Sam sighs and you hear him lean forward. “Look, it’s weird. No one is denying that. But never has an imprintation been wrong.”

You bite your lip and shake your head. “Well it was wrong this time. Maybe this is why there has never been a female Quileute wolf before. Who knows who Leah will imprint on. God I hate this.”

There was a warm hand on your back. “I’m sorry (y/n). It’s not always easy. You just have to keep faith that everything will turn out okay. Your brothers and sister miss you.”

Brothers and sister.

Courage finally made you roll over and face him. “What do I do now though Sam?”

From the expression on his face you knew that he didn’t know either. That he was as clueless as you. There were no words of wisdom that he could offer you, but he tried. “Continue what you have been doing. Protecting the pack. Protecting the people of Forks from vampires. Jacob says the one that entered our territory was actually an enemy of the Cullen’s. Someone seeking revenge against them. There could potentially be more that follow. A vampire with a taste for revenge is a horrific monster.”

When you lift yourself up from your bed you reel back at the fatigue that made your head warm. You hadn’t really been eating well for the past couple of days. You couldn’t even remember the last time you had eaten.

Sam saw that and offered you a smile. “Emily’s making dinner tonight. Why don’t you come over. Everyone really does miss you.”

You remember how much fun you had with the others. Laughing and joking around, like a real family. You were an only child so it felt good to be around others your age. Eating Emily’s amazing food and just enjoy one another’s company before going out on patrol. It brought a smile on your face. “Count me in.”

Maybe that’s what you needed. Something to ease your heartache and keep your mind off of Edward. A good laugh with Embry, Jared, Paul and Quil would surely be enough to start the healing process.

Your parents were relieved to see you and Sam coming out of your room. Inside you regretted making them worry so much. You knew all this werewolf stuff must not have been easy for them to deal with in the beginning. Even now it must be weird for them to look at you and know that you weren’t just a normal teenage girl anymore. You were something from fairy tales and horror stories now. To their credit they never freaked out or made you feel even worse than you already did. They took everything in stride and tried to support you in any way possible. You wished you were a better daughter and didn’t make them worry so much. But they just smiled at you, saying they were so happy just to see you walking around.

Numbness washed over you the entire drive in Sam’s car. Both of you were silent as thoughts tumbled around your head. Even looking at the tall trees that fenced one side of the street made you think of Edward as he had emerged from the trees into the clearing. Beautiful and pale, devastatingly handsome Edward.

What kind of person was he? Apparently honest and loyal if he was still tied to Bella.

You turn your face away from the window. You wanted to erase him from your mind at least for a little while. There was nothing you could do now. Sam was right; you just had to keep hope that everything will turn out okay even if it was looking bleak at the moment. Fate didn’t make you imprint on Edward for nothing. You honestly didn’t know how everything would work out for you though. From the tone in his voice you could tell that he really did love Bella. A love like that didn’t fade any time soon.

“There she is!” Paul cheers once he sees you walking up the steps to Sam’s porch. The door was wide open and you could see everyone peering their faces through it. “We thought you had killed yourself!”

With a snarl, Leah slaps him upside the head. “Don’t say that.”

“What?! I’m saying I’m happy she didn’t off herself!”

Instead of being offended you laughed, clear as a bell. Just that made all the weight lift from your chest. It felt good to laugh again.

In Sam’s living room most of the pack was crammed in. The rest were lingering in the kitchen, hounding Emily for a snack or even a quick taste of what she was cooking. You heard her laugh and a small smacking noise that made the other laugh in return.

“(y/n), is it true you imprinted on Edward?” Jacob immediately stands up reducing the living room to silence.

Embry shakes his head and tries to make his friend sit back down. “Dude, not now.”

“You have the worst timing.” Jared scolds the younger wolf.

“Jacob, not now.” Warns Sam as he sits you down in his favorite armchair. “We talked about this.”

He wasn’t letting up though. In fact it seemed he was more excited than ever. “But if she’s imprinted on Edward that means he can’t be with Bella! He’s (y/n)’s soul-mate!”

“You’re just concerned about yourself. Face it, Bella is never going to be interested in you. She’s not even your imprintee so shut up. You complaining about Bella and Edward is obnoxious.” The one other female werewolf hisses, her dark eyes glaring at Jacob intently.

Jacob looks like he’s about to argue back, fury on his face, until Sam makes it clear that that discussion was over. Defeated, Jacob slumps back into the couch. Quil pats him on the back in an attempt to comfort him. You knew this was a big deal for Jacob too. But Leah was right. If he hadn’t imprinted on Bella yet, that meant he never would. His real soul-mate was still out there and it wasn’t her.

“(y/n)!” Emily’s sweet voice chimes in as she enters the living room, a glass of (favorite soda) already in her hands. “I’m so happy to see you.”

You smile up at her gratefully as she hands you your glass. “Thank you Emily.” Among your pack you felt the pain start to dissipate. You knew it wouldn’t go away, maybe it never would, but for now the pain being quiet would have to do.

Even though the wolves were miles away, Edward could still hear their thoughts. He heard every bit of (y/n)’s suffering, every ounce of hate that her pack felt toward him even more. Edward thought he wouldn’t have time to think of such things, but it kept nagging at his head. This deal with Victoria seemed even further away.

Her pain was so vivid. Utter devastation that crashed through her like massive waves. What was Edward supposed to have done in such a situation? Not even Alice could’ve ever predicted that happening.

Imprinting was such a curious thing. Vampires had mates, but it was nothing as intense as imprinting. The very moment (y/n) had imprinted on him he had heard it, like a scream from her heart. It had hit him hard, rendering him without any words. No one’s thoughts had ever been quite as loud as her’s. Just hearing what was going on in her head made Edward’s stomach light up with the same sensation she was feeling.

He shook his head, running a hand over his eyes. This would definitely complicate things between his family and the Quileute wolves. They would definitely need their help in defeating Victoria if what they heard from the Denali clan was true; that she had a massive army of newborn vampires.

Why did wolves seem to be invading his life?

Again he envisions (y/n), her face crushed and contorting into that of a (color) wolf, far larger than he was.

“Obsessing over it won’t change anything.” Edward lifts his head up to find Alice leaning against his doorframe, her arms crossed. Rosalie was behind her, disgust on her face.

“Is it true? One of those filthy dogs is in love with you?” Rosalie sneers; such a pretty face shouldn’t be sneering in such a manner.

Rolling his eyes he sits up in his bed. “She didn’t fall in love with me. It’s called imprinting Rose.”

“Regardless the mutt still has feelings for you.”

Ignoring her sister, Alice steps inside. “Did you tell Bella?”

“Why would I tell her?”

“Ed, you told me yourself that imprinting is a big thing among the shape-shifters. This isn’t something to just brush off. You may have rejected her but this is bigger than that. Fate or whatever chose you as her mate.” Tone low and serious, Edward knew what Alice said to be true. He couldn’t just ignore the fact that out of everyone in the entire world (y/n) had imprinted on him. That meant more than any human falling in love.

#twilight saga #twilight fanfiction #twilight fanfic #twilight #edward cullen x reader #edward cullen fanfic #edward cullen fanfiction #edward cullen x you #edward cullen x y/n

470 notes · View notes

mednerds · 4 years ago

Photo

More than 500 vaccine doses were left out to spoil on purpose by a hospital employee.

An employee at a Wisconsin hospital intentionally removed more than 500 doses of coronavirus vaccine from refrigeration third week of December 2020, rendering them useless, the hospital system said Wednesday night.

The employee’s motive is unclear.

The hospital, the Aurora Medical Center in Grafton, Wis., notified the local police department, which is investigating the incident, along with the Federal Bureau of Investigation and the Food and Drug Administration, the police said.

The person responsible, whom it did not name, is no longer an employee, the hospital system said in its statement. It was not clear whether any charges had been brought. The police department said it could not comment further on an active investigation.

“We are more than disappointed that this individual’s actions will result in a delay of more than 500 people receiving their vaccine,” the hospital system, Aurora Health Care, said.

Aurora said it learned of the incident earlier this week and was originally led to believe that the spoilage was accidental. But on Wednesday, it said, the employee acknowledged intentionally removing the vials of vaccine from refrigeration.

The spoiled doses were of the Moderna vaccine, which can be stored safely at normal freezer temperatures. The other vaccine authorized for use in the United States so far, developed by Pfizer and BioNTech, must be kept much colder in special ultracold freezers.

Wisconsin experienced a devastating surge of coronavirus cases in the fall, and at times was the hardest-hit state in the nation relative to its population. Transmission has since slowed a bit, but the state is still reporting about 39 new cases a day for every 100,000 people. At least 5,195 Wisconsin residents have died.

As of December 29th, 2020, the state had received 156,875 doses of vaccines and had administered 47,157 doses, according to the Wisconsin Department of Health Services.

Update, December 31st, 2020:

A pharmacist at a Wisconsin hospital has been arrested and accused of intentionally removing more than 500 doses of coronavirus vaccine from refrigeration. The hospital administered some of the doses before realizing that they had been spoiled, the hospital system said. The pharmacist, a man whom the police did not name, was arrested on recommended charges of first degree recklessly endangering safety, adulterating a prescription drug and criminal damage to property, all felonies. He is being held in the Ozaukee County jail.

By Kate Taylor (The New York Times). Image: Cooper Neill for The New York Times.

#science #medicine #medblr #news #covid vaccines

236 notes · View notes

honesthammie · 3 years ago

Text

Prompt 39: Death wants you to be terrified. But the scariest thing is wanting death.

13th Doctor x female curvy reader

Warnings: mentions of suicidal thoughts, alcohol and drug abuse, domestic abuse, fat phobia

I'm sorry for this. Its really depressing and I've been hesitant on letting you guys see it but I kinda like how it's written. I've made the abuser gender neutral as females can also be abusive. I promise the next one will be much happier!

"Come on (y/n), you can make it! Just jump across and reach for my hand. I promise you won't fall." The Doctors voice echoes across the widening canyon. If you looked down, you would only see pitch black. You didn't know how long you'd fall. Maybe this would be the perfect time to just go for it. Its not like you'd matter, you're only slowing the team down as is.

They wouldn't even be in this mess if you didn't slip and hit the world shattering drill, turning it on full blast. Unfortunately, you smashed the button making it unable to turn it off. Of course the only way you'd be able to turn it off is to actually go towards it. Everyone in the room screamed at you and some raised their tentacles to attack you if the Doctor didn't step in front of you. You know the Doctor noticed you flinching and your eyes gloss over and noticed you bracing for the impact.

You learned over the years to just accept your fate. You can't run from anyone when you weighed this much. You couldn't hide either, which often left you to just accept what was coming and hope nothing broke. Bruises were always easy to cover and so were any cuts but broken bones, that was always on display and you'd have to break your number one rule: never lie. You hated lying. The truth always comes out anyway so why hide it? If you hide it, you get punished worse anyway so why bother?

If you jumped and actually went with the team, you'd get questioned about earlier and about hesitating at jumping. But if you fell, would the Doctor miss you? As much as you hated to admit it, you were absolutely in love with the adorable alien. Why did you hate to admit it? Because she was a goddess and you were a waste of skin and bones. You weren't skinny and you didn't fit in with the team at all. You were only here out of pity.

You remember when you first met the team. You were the only person alive when they searched underneath the hotel. Even the spiders didn't want you. You were at the hotel because you heard about killer spiders and you wanted an out. You could never do it or something would come up stopping you from ending all your misery. You were the complete opposite of the Doctor. She was so brave and said whatever she wanted and didn't really care for the consequences.

You focused on the Doctors sparkling eyes. Despite the situation, she still sparkled with hope and encouragement. She wasn't upset with you. You really wished she was. This would be such an easier decision to make. Your head was pounding and your heart was going faster than her two hearts. Did you even want her upset? You couldn't tell, your head was spinning wildly, one thought going to another without a chance to process the last one.

You had come to a clear decision. You ran back and let momentum do its thing as your feet left the muddy gravel. You felt so free as you glided in the air for a few seconds. It was the most beautiful feeling. No punishment, no tears before going to sleep and no terror of going back home. Just you and gravity.

Then with a clearer mind you regretted your choice. You were horrified. You weren't ready. It wasn't time yet. Graham can't lose you. He'd only recently lost his wife. He'd feel the same as you and that thought terrified you. He'd survived cancer and gained himself a new family. He can't be like you. Ryan needed him, wether he was willing to admit that or not.

Suddenly you panicked and last minute reached your hand out hoping you'd grab something. Anything. You felt a soft warm object and latched on for dear life. You were then lifted up and onto soil. You focused on your breathing a moment and waited for your heart to calm down. You looked up and saw what, or rather who, saved you. You shouldn't have been so surprised to see the Doctors worried face above yours. She gave you a questioning look, knowing the question, you nodded your head and she straightened herself and helped you up.

"That was great (n/n)! So brave of you! Let's go gang, we've gotta turn this drill off before it splits the planet in half!" She shouted as she ran forward, seemingly knowing the way. She didn't let go of your hand until you reached the drill about 10 minutes later. You couldn't help the blushthat formed on your cheeks. The Doctor quickly opened a panel on the side of the drill.

The drill was massive, bigger than the Eiffel Tower and that what was on surface level, it went down much deeper that it had reached halfway to the liquid nitrogen that ran in this cold planet where our magma centre would be. The drill itself was purple and spherical. The panel box was the size of a human head which was about the size of the civilisations sucker pads. Inside were 3 buttons and 1 lever. You needed to type the pattern that would gain the access to the drill and force stop. If it goes wrong, it speeds up rendering this planet uninhabitable.

You watched as the Doctor quickly typed the pattern in. Red,blue,red,red,red,blue,black,black,blue. That was the pattern she quickly pressed in and held the lever down for 10 seconds. Soon the drill came to a halt and the planet was peaceful once again. You all let out a sigh of relief as it stopped.

You made your way back to the chief of the race and explained that they should dismantle and never use that drill again unless they plan to empty the panet of everything it has within. He quickly agreed and the fam made their way back to the TARDIS.

As soon as tye TARDIS was parked on the edge of your solar system, you got into your comfy clothes ready to nap or maybe play a few games to slow your adrenaline until you were tired enough for a full nights rest. You played a few rounds of uno and some poker where you used some bits of metal instead of chips. Eventually everyone had left except you and the Doctor.

You made your way to the doors of the ship and settled down just watching the stars in front of you. If the sentient machine hadn't already been aware of your darkest thought, you would have jumped out there and been amongst them. Just floating eventually turning to nothing but bones drifting, maybe to never be found. All the sights you've seen and yet this is where you were the most impressed. This was your home, your galaxy and because of all the light pollution, you had never been fully aware of how many neighbours you had because you had been literally blind. This was only stuff captured and faked and now, it's forever in your mind.

You heard movement and a shuffle next you. You knew who it was because she was the only other person awake and you knew she was going to ask and not let it drop until you tell her truth. And you were going to give her it but that doesn't mean you were ready to do so but you had to, someone had to know. Maybe you wanted help or maybe just someone to listen and know everything making you mentally naked in front of them.

The Doctor waited a few moments. She was figuring out how to word it without sounding horrible. "Is everything alright at home?" She asked her voice laced with genuine concern. "Sorry if this sounds a bit abrupt but let me explain. You've been really weird lately. You hardly speak and when you its with as few words as possible, you keep going elsewhere mentally and Rassilion forbid anyone getting angry with you! I also noticed how you hesitated today when jumping and I saw your worry and panic when you jumped. I think I know but I can't help you if you don't at least tell me what is going on! And don't change the subject or anything, just answer me please. I lo-. I can't lose you too." Her voice raised a little as she panicked just speaking about it. Halfway through she grabbed both of your hands and continued her speech.

You looked deep into her eyes for any sign of a lie but there wasn't one. Just like at the canyon, her eyes showed nothing but love. Maybe you should tell her, just her. No Yaz, no Graham and no Ryan. Just you, The Doctor and the TARDIS. You looked away for a moment as you collected your thoughts. However, as you opened your mouth and tried to speak, you found no voice. You couldn't tell her about them. Lord knows what she's capable of. But you've been looking for an out for so damn long. Maybe this is it. She's your out, no death involved.

You walked towards a panel in the console and pushed your hands inside and focused. You focused on the worst time it happened. You concentrated on the fear and everything attached. You couldn't tell her, but you could show her. The TARDIS disappeared into the vortex but didn't seem so sure on landing. She was picking it all up, she felt everything you did and she did not like going. "Please baby girl, I need her to know. I need help but I can't tell her. She's my only out that doesn't involve death and that terrifies me! Please. I understand your hesitation but she needs to see." You spoke mentally to the sentient blue box. She made a sad sound as she gently landed in the moment.

The Doctor looked at you bewildered. Her eyes were wide and her mouth agape. You walked up to her and grabbed her hand reassuringly. You led her to the doors that separated her from your darkest secret. You took a deep breath and slowly opened the door.

You appeared to be in the basement of your house. You walked up the stairs and took her to a storage room where she could see it happen. You sat in silence for a few minutes only the sounds of breathing and your heartbeat could be heard.

You knew this day off by heart, it plagued your nightmares often. It all started to sweet and went sour so quickly. At this time you were currently on your way back from doing your weekly shop to Tescos making sure you didn't forget their vodka and gin on your way to pay. Thankfully, the shop was only 10 minuets away and you doubted that the TARDIS would make you wait longer than nessacary. Just as the Doctor opened her mouth to speak the door opened and in walked an 18 year old you.

You set the bags down and started sorting the items into their new places. The canned foods go in the cupboard and the meat goes into the fridge. There were loads of food and stuff to go through and place properly. After you placed the last can of baked beans into the cupboard, the door swung open, nearly breaking the door.

They came home from their dealers place early. They stunk of weed and alcohol and had a little white powder around their nose. They looked like they had a good time until they had to come home. It was their dealers birthday so he was having a brothel themed party meaning there were strippers, pole dancers and prostitutes as well. The dealer was a rich guy who practically ran this city. The cops couldn't do anything as he could always bail himself out of jail.

They looked you in your comfy clothes and scoffed. They looked angry. "Why aren't you in your normal clothes babes? I thought I told you to throw away all of that shit. Come on now. Don't tell me I wasted all my well earned money on those clothes I specifically chose for you?"

You shuddered, both in the past and now except now they only made bile rise into your throat. You were so young and vulnerable. Now you know better.

The past you quickly scampered off to get changed. After only 5 minutes you reappeared in what was sexy school girl. The blue miniskirt covered less than most underwear so you were forced to wear a thong. The shirt was a bralet that barely covered your nipples. Your hair was in pigtails and you wore thigh highs. The sight made you silently sick in your mouth. You looked pathetic and weak.

You looked at them expectingly. You were waiting for your next order from them. They seemed to drool at the sight of you. "That's better babes. Why didn't you go shopping like that? Show the world your fat ugly figure? I want you to walk out there and see that no one else wants you but here I am, loving you. I am the only one who will ever like you in the way we have now. Your lucky I've had some fun tonight. All I want is my vodka and a new blunt darling"

You quickly went and grabbed their stuff and walked towards them as they settled in front of the TV. They turned the TV on and put Love Island on. How you hated that show. It made you feel bad for being the size you are. The women on there were beautiful but you also knew that, that kind of beauty costs money. So while your partner had fun watching the show for the romance, you watched it to spot what part of them was bought and what was real. Almost all the women had fake teeth and breasts. You hated how your partner would make snide comments on how they looked compared to you.

"You should be looking like Becky ya know. Beautiful teeth, big perky tits and a fucking great ass. What do you have? Flabs!" And there was the first comment of the day. The first of 30, you counted.

"Yeah well you are fucking broke so I can't look like fucking fake ass Becky or the others!" You thought. Then the Doctor gave you a look of shock and pity and then you realised you said that aloud. Not loud enough for them to hear you but enough for the Doctor.

"Make yourself fucking useful and make me some dinner. I fancy a steak and chips." They ordered as you got up and waddled over to the kitchen. A few minutes in you realised you put too much oil in the pan for the steak but the steak was already in and cooking quick. So quick that it started to smoke just a little bit. You tried blowing it away from them before they realised that you fucked up their dinner but ut was too late. They were already on their feet a marching towards you.

"I'm so sorry. I accidentally poured too much oil in. I'm so sorry. I have a spare steak, you can have my meal for tonight, I could do with skipping a meal anyways, helps me lose weight!" Past you was panicked and present you wasn't much better. Even though you were safe from them, they still made you uneasy. If you were to ever see them again, you'd freeze. They made your blood run cold. Even their voice sent unpleasant shivers down your spine.

"You better make me another steak but I still have to punish you. You fucked up, a lesson needs to be learnt." They said scarily politely. They grabbed your left arm and marched you towards the sink. They also grabbed the burning pan and pinned you so you had no escape as they poured the boiling oil onto your skin. You knew not to scream do you bit into your other arm knowing a bite out of it is better than causing more punishments for screaming.

When they were done left to watch the TV and you knew what that meant. You had to cook the spare steak and make there meal before you can get proper treatment at the hospital. Through your tears of agony, you quickly ran your burnt and bleeding arm under the cold water of the sink. You bit deeper into your other arm and tasting blood, but thay didn't stop you until the left one had cooled down. Then you got an old shirt, ripped 2 pieces of fabric off and wrapped them around both arm Injuries. You then continued their meal.

Once they had the meal they kicked you and punched you in the stomach because the chips were slightly cold and then they drove you to the hospital as they promised. When you had left you didn't realise you had been crying until a drop fell on your arm. You walked out of the storage room and sat on the sofa, turning the TV off.

The Doctor looked shocked for a moment before walking over and kneeling in front of you. The Doctor went silent for a moment. Before she could speak, you decided to speak first.

"I couldn't tell you because I couldn't think if a nice way of telling you. I didn't want to appear weak to you." You cried as your voice cracked in the middle due to the tears and the strain. The Doctor looked at you in pity and disappointment.

"This does not make you weak. Being abused does not make you weak. Because being abused is like being tortured by someone who supposed to love you and cherish you. They are meant to protect you from danger not be the danger. I would never hurt you. I know that I put you in risky situations but believe me, I would never intentionally put you in danger. You mean too much to me" The Doctor softly spoke with tears making a little river down her soft cheeks and onto your black carpet below.

"Before I met them, I was like you or Yaz. I was so happy at everything. Very little could bring me down. But I met them and started dating them and suddenly, my world of sunshine faded to grey. There was no light. I wanted to die Doctor. When you found me at that spider hotel, I wanted to be free from them as I couldn't do it. I can't because they'd kill me. I don't want to be alive whilst I'm with them. I have so many scars from either them or me trying to end my own life and that the scariest thing. Death wants us to be terrified but wanting to die is so much more terrifying Doctor, I know that." You cried as you emptied all you could to her. The Doctor was silent for a moment, taking in everything you said. Waves of emotion flashed through her, anger, sadness, pity and something you couldn't quite place.

"You said wanted. That's past tense. You said wanted to die. What changed? What made you want to live?"

"You did. You saved me from the spiders. You gave me a temporary out of the relationship for a while. You made me smile for the first time in 3 years! You made me laugh. The world of grey is now full of sunshine and rainbows Doctor. You also saved me today. When I jumped across that canyon, I jumped to end my life. I made a mistake that nearly ended a planet! If I wasn't so fat and clumsy maybe i-"

"Don't you dare say that! You are not fat (n/n). Yes you have more plush to your body but you are not fat. I hate that word. Its such a nasty word. You are gorgeous, amazing and so brilliant. You can't see what I see and I really wished you could for just one moment. You are worthy of being loved and cared for. You are precious, rare, one of a kind. I've never met anyone like you. There's always some skinny, fake bodied and caked up women but there's no one with as much natural beauty as you! Let's get back to the TARDIS and we'll talk more when looking at the stars because I can see that being here isn't doing you any favours" The Doctor spoke with such passion that you started to believe that her words held more than those of a supporting friend would.

Once the TARDIS was parked in the Milky Way you settled by the door once again and found yourself accompanied by the sweet alien. You both sat there for a moment just content with wrapping your heads around what's just happened. You looked over to the blonde and noticed how the stars made her glow in such an ethereal way that you felt almost compelled to worship her. Maybe you should after everything she's done for you. Her eyes sparkled with si many emotions from the past senario.

"Are you still with them?"

"Why do you think I never left this place? I mean even if could, I wouldn't want to but it's mainly because if I go back home, I'll come back with more injuries. I feel safer with you. You are my sunshine and rainbows and they are my storm clouds. Whilst I'm here, I'm alive and mostly unbroken. Whilst I'm there, I'm as alive as a puppet and severely broken. I can't leave, not on my own anyway."

The Doctor looked at you in thought. "The starlight compliments you. You look so pretty and almost angelic. I just wish they never hurt my angel. My innocent angel had broken wings and I'm going to fix what the Devil broke, I promise. Just hold on, I'm going to take us somewhere."

You held the nearest crystal as the TARDIS transported you somewhere but it seemed like the sentient machine was determined to take you there as quick as she could. As you opened the doors you noticed a familiar smell of weed mixed with alcohol. You heard the familiar tune of Love Island and knew exactly where you were. You were home. The Doctor saw your hesitation and whispered softly, "I want you to pack everything you want. I've written a note for them to find. I'm going to put it on the bed. If they notice you scream for me and I'll be there. They will not hurt you much, hopefully not at all. I just need to do something in the TARDIS before I help you." She turned and left into the TARDIS and disappeared down a corridor.

The atmosphere sent chills down your spine and you were frozen. The TARDIS seemed to notice and words of encouragement were sent into your head which helped you move towards your bedroom. You quickly buy quietly opend your suitcase and started to fill it with clothing and hygiene products. As you entered the bathroom a bottle of their shampoo fell into the tub giving you away. You knew you only had so long before they came in and hurt you so you closed the door and barricaded it with whatever you could.

As you pushed the last cabinet to the pile they roared through the wooden door. "Let me in you fat dumb bitch. You've been gone for 3 weeks and you've got some balls coming back! You're lucky I haven't burned all your shit! Where have you been?"

Your heart ran at an extremely fast pace nd you knew only one person could help you now. And so you screamed her name so loud it hurt your throat bit that didn't stop you. You screamed until you heard talking. You couldn't understand what was said but suddenly a thud was heard and then silence.

"Hey Starlight! It's only me. I've taken care of them. They're not dead but in a venishion aikido. They can't move, they're paralysed. You can come out and finish packing"

You moved everything out of the door and opened it to a view you expected. The Doctor with 2 fingers to their pulse point on their neck. The Doctor smiled at when they saw you. You finished packing and zipped the bag up. Then Yaz walked in with her police uniform on and arrested them for domestic violence and many other things. Now you understood why The Doctor left, it was to get Yaz as a back up option to completely take them out of your life.

The Doctor helped open doors for you as you got your room and you set the suitcase to one side to empty another day. You both sat down on your bed. The sound was filled with nothing but 2 lifeforms breathing and the TARDIS faint buzzing. You two stayed like this, staring into each other, trying to read the others emotions. But we all know what The Doctor is like, she can't stay silent for long.

"I had to save you because as long as you were with them, you weren't ever going to be truly happy. I didn't want my big bright star to turn into a black hole, I wanted her to be a supernova. My Starlight deserves to be happy."

"You keep saying my Doctor. And you asked if I was still with them and then when I basically said yes, you quickly, as in a rush, sent us home so I could leave them. You keep saying all these things about me. You held my hand from the canyon to the drill. You are always the first to check on me and you always make sure I'm OK first even if I'm the farthest person from you! Doctor, be honest, I don't want any more bullshit. Doctor why?" You spoke softly but with determination. The Doctor blushed and shifted her gaze to the stars and quietly gulped. She knew this day would come. The day her secret was revealed. And she dreaded her answer and she dreaded your reaction. And whilst she figured out what to say, you already knew the answer.

You gently grabbed her chin and made her look at you. Once her gaze caught yours, you smiled and placed your lips to her soft ones. Quickly she caught up and kissed you back with all the love and passion she could muster. She wanted to relay that she did love you and that she would do exactly as she said earlier, she would cherish you.

As for you, you smiled. You finally had an out that didn't end in death but instead ended with the same love that you yearned for, for years.

#13th doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader #13th doctor x reader #depressing post #im sorry

31 notes · View notes

aion-rsa · 3 years ago

Text

Squid Game: Best of the Cast’s Shows and Movies to Watch

https://ift.tt/39n8nzK

This Squid Game article contains some spoilers, though not the outcome of the game.

There are so many things to like about Squid Game, Netflix‘s Korean-language series about a group of desperate people competing in a deadly game, but one of the major ones is the stellar cast. Featuring some well-known Korean actors, as well as some relative newcomers to the acting scene, Squid Game‘s ensemble is more than ready to elevate the clever script and sharp direction. If you’re interested in checking out other projects from this cast after finishing Squid Game, here are our recommendations!

Lee Jung-jae (이정재) as Seong Gi-hun

Squid Game character: Leading the cast of characters is Lee Jung-jae’s Gi-hun, a man who has fallen on tough times after losing his job and his marriage. We are first introduced to Gi-hun in the context of his gambling addiction, as he desperately trues to get out of crippling debt in order to be a better father, son, and friend.

What to watch next: Lee Jung-jae is a 48-year-old actor who began his career as a model before transitioning into TV and later film. Notable projects include Il Mare, the 2000 film on which Hollywood’s The Lake House was based and 2013’s historical drama The Face Reader, in which Lee has second-billing as Grand Prince Suyang.

Jung Ho-yeon (정호연) as Kang Sae-byeok

Squid Game character: Jung Ho-yeon plays Kang Sae-byeok (aka the one who looks like ENHYPEN’s Ni-ki), a North Korean defector who decides to play Squid Game in order to get the money to get her mother out of North Korea and to create a stable life for her younger brother, who is currently living in an orphanage.

What to watch next: Jung Ho-yeon will no doubt be one of the breakout stars of Squid Game. The 27-year-old actress is a successful model, and has previously appeared on Korea’s Next Top Model. Squid Game is her first on-screen role, so we’ll have to wait to see what she does next. In the meantime, you can rewatch Squid Game or check out Season 4 of Korea’s Next Top Model.

Park Hae-soo (박해수) as Cho Sang-woo

Squid Game character: Cho Sang-woo grew up with protagonist Gi-hun, and is the success story of his neighborhood after going to a prestigious university and making it big as a businessman. Unbeknownst to Gi-hun and Sang-woo’s mother, Sang-woo has stolen money from his clients and is wanted by the police. He enters Squid Game in an attempt to make back the money so that he can save his mother’s business and house, both of which he risked to back his illegal activities.

Squid Game Ending Explained

By Kayti Burt

Squid Game: What Could Season 2 Look Like?

By Kayti Burt

What to watch next: Park Hae-soo is a 39-year-old actor who is perhaps previously best known, especially to international audiences, for his starring role in 2017’s Prison Playbook (one of our Best Korean Dramas to Watch on Netflix). In the drama, Park plays a baseball player who unexpectedly lands himself in jail days before his major league baseball debut. The show follows his life within prison, along with the lives of other inmates and guards, including his former best friend, who is now a corrections officer. Prison Playbook is one of the most popular K-dramas ever.

Wi Ha-joon (위하준) as Hwang Jun-ho

Squid Game character: Wi Ha-joon plays Hwang Jun-ho, who is a bit of an outlier character in a series that mostly features characters in the game as protagonists. Unlike Gi-hun or Sang-woo, Jun-ho is a cop who is investigating Squid Game after finding one of the game’s calling cards in his missing brother’s apartment. He does a pretty good job too, infiltrating the operation in diverse ways.

What to watch next: Wi is a 30-year-old actor with a solid filmography. If you’re a horror fan, check out Gonjiam: Haunted Asylum, a 2018 found footage horror film that takes place in the former Gonjiam Psychiatric Hospital, considered to be one of Korea’s most-haunted places. You could also check out Midnight, a 2021 thriller in which Wi plays a serial killer. If you’re looking for something a bit softer, Wi has a supporting role in 2018 romantic drama Something in the Rain, in which he stars as one protagonist’s younger brother and the other protagonist’s best friend.

Oh Young-soo (오영수) as Oh Il-nam

Squid Game character: Oh Young-soo plays Oh Il-nam, the oldest contestant in Squid Game, and someone Gi-hun feels some responsibility for as the game progresses.

What to watch next: Oh Young-soo is a 76-year-old actor with a filmography that mostly includes monk roles. His previous work has mostly included playing supporting roles, but if you want to see him in something else, check out 2003 feature film A Little Monk, about a generation of three monks living in one temple, or Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter… and Spring, a 2003 film about the life of a Buddhist monk.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

Heo Sung-tae as Jang Deok-su

Squid Game character: Heo Sung-tae plays Jang Deok-su, a gangster who enters Squid Game to settle his gambling debts, and who refuses to trust anyone in the process.

What to watch next: Heo Sung-tae is a 43-year-old actor with an extensive filmography. If you’d like to see him in a very different project, check out Racket Boys, a recent Netflix K-drama in which he appears as the coach of a boys badminton team in Episodes 10-12. If you’d like to see him in another dastardly role, check out 2021’s Beyond Evil, in which he plays a cold-blooded businessman.

Kim Joo-ryung (김주령) as Han Mi-nyeo

Squid Game character: Kim Joo-ryung stars as Han Mi-nyeo, a woman who will say or do whatever she has to in order to find her best chance at winning. Originally introduced claiming to be a new mother, we never actually learn that much about Mi-nyeo’s life outside of the game.

What to watch next: Kim Joo-ryung is a 45-year-old actress with an extensive filmography, though mostly in supporting roles. (Hopefully, her impressive turn in Squid Game will lead to more opportunities for the actress.) If you’d like to see her in a minor role in a successful drama, Kim appears in Episodes 16 and 17 of 2018 historical drama Mr. Sunshine. If you’d like to see Kim in a central role, check out 2012 feature Sleepless Night, in which she plays one half of a married couple working to get through daily life.

Tripathi Anupam as Abdul Ali

Squid Game character: Tripathi Anupam plays Ali, a 33-year-old Pakistani man who joins the game in order to get the money to support his family, including his parents and brother back in Pakistan and his wife and baby son, who traveled with him to Korea.

What to watch next: Tripathi Anupam is a 32-year-old Indian-born actor, who is another standout in Squid Game and a rare actor of non-Korean descent in the Korean TV and film industry. Anupam had a small appearance in Netflix’s Korean sci-fi feature Space Sweepers, in which he appeared as James Sullivan’s secretary. Most of Anupam’s previous roles have been minor, with Squid Game being a breakout role for the actor.

Lee Yoo-mi (이유미) as Ji-yeong

Squid Game character: Lee Yoo-mi plays Ji-yeong, a young woman who we find out entered the game immediately after having been released from prison for the crime of killing her abusive father. She becomes close with Sae-byeok, who recruits her to join her team for tug-of-war.

What to watch next: Lee Yoo-mi is a 27-year-old actress who has appeared in many TV shows and films, mostly in supporting roles. If you’d like to see her in another drama, check out 365: Repeat the Year, a time travel drama that sees 10 people given the chance to travel back a year to “reset” their lives, only to find themselves in danger.

Gong Yoo (공유) as The Salesman

Squid Game character: Gong Yoo appears in a minor role as The Salesman, aka the man who recruits Gi-hun into Squid Game by playing a game of ddakji with him on the subway

What to watch next: Gong Yoo is a very successful actor in Korea who is also known internationally. The 42-year-old actor’s most well-known movie role is Train To Busan, in which he stars as the divorced father and businessman protagonist trying to escape the zombie apocalypse on a high-speed bullet train. His most well-known TV role is in the uber successful Guardian: The Lonely and Great God, one of the highest-rated dramas in Korean TV history. In it, he stars as a 939-year-old immortal goblin and protector of souls. Longtime K-drama stans, however, probably know Gong from his starring role in Coffee Prince, a romance about a woman pretending to be a girl in order to get work and a young food empire mogul, played by Gong.

Lee Byung-hun as The Front Man, aka In-ho

Squid Game character: Lee Byung-hun plays the Front Man, aka the masked man who runs the day-to-day operations of Squid Game. He lives in a fancy apartment within the game’s facility, and maintains contact with the game’s supervisors via a landline.

What to watch next: If you’re looking to see more of Lee Byung-hun’s face than Squid Game offers, then you have a lot of options. The 51-year-old actor and singer has been a part of the Korean entertainment industry for decades, and has been one of the most successful Korean actors in that time, with five films on the 50 highest-grossing domestic films in South Korea list: Joint Security Area; The Good, the Bad, the Weird; Masquerade; Inside Men; and Master.

Lee is the only Squid Game actor to have some substantial Hollywood credits on his filmography as well. American audiences may recognize him from his role as Storm Shadow in the G.I. Joe franchise; he has also appeared in Red 2, Terminator Genisys, and The Magnificent Seven. A member of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, he was the first South Korean to present an Oscar at the Academy Awards.

Which Squid Game cast member were you the most impressed by? Let us know in the comments below…

The post Squid Game: Best of the Cast’s Shows and Movies to Watch appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3nRJEMj

#aion-rsa #Den of Geek

21 notes · View notes

murkierwords · 4 years ago

Text

YOU COULD’VE BEEN SOMETHING. ANYTHING. AND YOU RENDER YOURSELF TO THIS ?

DAKOTA is the disgraced daughter of the prestigious Wu family. After years of unfilial behaviour and a disastrous event that broke the camel’s back, Dakota is exiled from Singapore to a remote all-girls catholic boarding school in the UK during her adolescence and has been stuck in the dreary island ever since.

Now, an apathetic salesperson working day-to-day for a pay-check all while getting nagged by the only person from her family willing to talk to her, Dakota feels as though her life is nothing but static robotic motions and swirls of grey. That is until her old friend from university introduces her to Body Count. The next thing she knows Dakota finds herself taking an impromptu leave from her monotonous work and is impatiently waiting for the interviewer.

Desperate for a change of scenery with the added chance of winning mad cash (and to feel something again aside from deeply repressed shame and anger), Dakota’s off to either worm her way into the hearts of the contestants and audience or die trying.

Metaphorically, of course.

The picrew used to make this is OC is done by @ummmmandy. Go check out their art!

This OC is my MC from the interactive fiction Body Count, written by @bodycountgame! Check it out if you like dating shows and murder mysteries.

Or click down here to read more about her!

NAME. Dakota Wu / Wu Lin Jie.

AGE. Twenty-seven ( 27 ) years old.

PRONOUNS. Her / She.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION. Pansexual.

IN IT FOR… What caught her attention, at first, was using any excuse to get out of her monotonous job. But what really made her apply was the prize money. With that kind of cash, who gives a flying shit if she’s a stain to society?

POTENTIAL LOVE INTEREST(S). Imogen. Nyra. Arthur.

PERSONALITY

Openness. 75%

Dakota has always been one for adventures and trying out new things. She’s usually very curious and, more often than not, open to new things she can experience. Especially, if it means she can her adrenaline pumping.

Conscientiousness. 28%

Dakota’s never been one to be careful. She’s consistently impulsive and not really a forward thinker. The future is a vague and ambiguous thing in her mind. And, she’d rather through caution to the wind and just do things to get things done. So, it’s not that hard to see how Dakota managed to be financially fucked right after getting her degree.

Extraversion. 39%

This is more beaten into her as the years go by. Dakota used to be the outgoing kind but it had never really served her as well as she thought it would. When she was younger, she would yap on without any thought and care and that would always end up biting her in the ass. As grew older, these words became more true: Hell is other people.

Agreeableness. 60%

Despite all her dislike of other people, Dakota is generally a friendly person. And even as the years go by, she can never let her habit of helping a stranger with a small task go. What luck, she’s an unfortunate little do-gooder.

Neuroticism. 43%

For most of Dakota’s life, she has never been one to let negative experiences wholly colour her entire world. And while Dakota is (and, she thinks she will forever be) bitter about her past, she tries to not let it affect her too deeply. She doesn’t really like to examine her emotions or feelings too deeply and instead has a tendency to compartmentalise her emotions. This usually leads her actively seeking out some sort of misguided stoicism (having a stiff upper lip had always been a popular thing within the Wu family- guess Dakota couldn’t really escape that) or do something new and exciting to stimulate her brain from actually reflecting.

BEHAVIOUR

Promiscuous / Committed

Dakota is in this to win it- well, kind of. She’s planning on, at least, winning through the highest body count since she doesn’t really believe you can find true love in a month. Much less find someone who’ll pretend to follow the couple’s act, and is good at tricking the audience and everyone else with her. So, she’s planning to bring out her old charm and tricks since she’s free to play the game. It’s her logical conclusion that she came up with and, hey, it’s been a while since she had any action.

Comedic / Serious

A bit of playful banter never really hurt anyone. And Dakota’s not really the type to be all serious when she’s around people. That screams vulnerability and she’d rather throw her own family to the hyenas than have an in-depth conversation about… ugh, her feelings. Though, Dakota understands there is a time and place for everything; she can be serious when it totally suits her. But all the same, having a joking persona makes her feel protected in a way that reminds her of high school and if smiling can force out dopamine from her brain then you can bet your ass that she’ll give you a mega-watt smile to feel something.

Bold / Reserved

Dakota has never been one to fade from the background. She likes to assert herself and make her presence known- she’s wasn’t the popular kid for nothing, y'know? And if a show where she can get attention and not be reprimanded for it by a vaguely intimidating authoritative figure that won’t tank her funds? Well, yes, please sign her up for that. Aside from that, Dakota has the mindset that she needs to be bold to win the game. Even when she hates surrounding herself with people, she’s willing to bring attention to herself if it means she’ll win the prize money.

Honest / Manipulative

From what she learned so far, her honesty has always been getting her into trouble ever since she was small. Hence, her tendency for… little white lies. Okay, maybe not so little. And maybe very big lies that come from trust issues and wanting to get what she wants from years of never getting it. Listen, Dakota’s just trying to survive and win. If that means hiding her true intentions and opinions from others, then so be it. She’s a manipulative little shit.

Friendly / Hostile

Being friendly comes easy to Dakota. While she thinks she needs to be friendly and charming towards others because it’ll make getting things she wants easier, it is also a principle-type thing as well. Dakota has always lived ‘treat others how you want them to treat you’. Well, as best as she can anyway.

APPEARANCE.

Eyes. Deep dark brown that borders onto black.

Hair. Original colour: ebony black. Dyed it platinum blonde. Wavy texture. Thick. Cut short, up to her chin. Though, her side bangs are kept long up until it reaches her shoulders.

Build. Short, 5'2". Lean and toned.

Distinguishing features. A splatter of freckles across her face only. Her eyebrows are not dyed, creating a sharp contrast with her platinum blonde hair.

Fashion style. Arty.

HOBBIES. reading. writing. running. kick-boxing. aikido. pub-crawling. online shopping. playing dungeons & dragons.

LIKES. books; murder mysteries, comedies, adventurous fantasy. movies; dramedies, thriller. podcasts; actual play d&d, true crime. sweet and sour food. sweet alcoholic drinks. the beach in spring. cozy libraries. flowers.

DISLIKES. computer science (while she will actively say she hates it, it’s definitely a love-hate relationship). her twin brother. being in a crowd. texting. overly friendly & touchy strangers. cramped spaces. hell is other people.

BACKGROUND INFO.

Singaporean-born Chinese, Dakota grew up in the bustling capital.

Technically, Dakota is the youngest in her family. She has an older sister and a twin brother, who is, unfortunately, a few minutes older than her.

Unlike the rest of her siblings, Dakota did not like the more academically heavy subjects (such as mathematics, biology, chemistry, etc.) and actively showed her dislike for them. Instead, she was more sports and the arts- she found joy in doing martial arts, Aikido and Kick-boxing in particular, and creative writing. As a result, she has a strained relationship with her parents, they marked her as a difficult child.

As a child, Dakota was boisterous, loud, and had no filter from her thoughts to her mouth. While she would soon grow out of this habit, it proved to earn the ire of her parents as it went against their image-obsessed and controlling nature.

Having this ill-repute, her brother was given the title of the Golden Child while her older sister was given the role of being the protector/guardian, responsible for doing chores within the household and setting a good example amongst her younger siblings. This also meant trying to reign in younger Dakota’s antics.

Dakota developed a crush on her childhood best friend as she grew up. She kept it a secret as she was afraid their friendship will turn to tatters. Though, despite it being one-sided, Dakota was happy and enjoyed their platonic relationship together. That is until her brother showed up and ruined everything.

During her final years in Secondary School, Dakota was caught in a physical altercation with her twin brother. Dakota, being the more athletic one, won the fight easily and seriously injured her brother and it resulted in him being sent to the hospital. This fight had resulted in Dakota being outed to her parents and community that her sexual and romantic preferences included girls. She was sent to an all-girls catholic boarding school in the UK, essentially exiled and shunned from her family. Dakota was told to stay away from Singapore and her parents would fund her education, when she graduated they would cut her off and leave her to fend for herself in the UK.

Her time in boarding school lead her to lash out more, believing that it will gain her family’s attention. It did not. True to their word, when Dakota graduated out of Sixth Form, she was left only with her saving funds, and her family- with the exception of her sister- cut off all contact with her.

Dakota used her savings to enroll into University, taking a Creative Writing course with the optimistic hope that this is a new start for her and that she’ll finally be able to pursue her passions without judgment or being belittled for it. After graduating, Dakota attempted to be a self-published author but as there wasn’t any luck. As the years passed by, her savings grew smaller and that forced her to finally find work as a temporary sales representative. She hated it.

A few years later, Dakota’s career path is shaky at best and objectively bad at worst. Dakota couldn’t hold a permanent job and, instead, jumped from one office to another and always as a temporary worker. Life has worn her down to the husk of who she used to be and now she keeps her mouth shut and only smiles when it serves her.

EXTRA

For a while now, Dakota is slowly growing to be an alcoholic.

Has a tendency to hide her true intentions without any actual ill will. It just kind of happens most of the time, a habit she picked up while growing up. Which results in her giving a white lie here or there.

Dakota knows how to play the cello due to her mother’s insistence.

Dakota definitely has it bad for Imogen. Like, really bad.

Dakota is an introvert- she’s more likely to do something reckless or be easily irritated if she doesn’t get her me time. Like, reading on her own, bundled up in a warm blanket with hot cocoa by her side.

Currently, D&D deprived and looking for a group to GM. She thinks Body Count might be a good place to try to recruit people to play with her.

#oc: dakota wu #bc mc #body count mc #what happens when preppy jock turns to angry punk to disatisfied adult #in another life probably fight club #next time picture aesthetics because fuck the coding fuckery #tried formatting this in html and i couldn't get the pictures to show up???#ChoiceScript #interactive fiction #original character #fun little exercise to figure out how tumblr works #did the exercise work? not really

38 notes · View notes

aconstantstateofbladerunner · 4 years ago

Text

101 Open MHA Gen Prompts

I had a very long ask game where people gave me fake titles and I came up with fic ideas to go with them. Multiple people asked to use some of them as prompts, and some of my friends have lately maligned the lack of gen prompts out there, so I decided to compile them all into a single post. Almost all of these are gen, aka not shipping, but you can do what you want I’m not your boss. Everything is free and open to use WITH CREDIT, so have fun with my word vomit.

1. In Dreams I Had the Sun - Being the number one hero isn’t all it’a cracked up to be, Toshinori realizes early on

2. The Chainlink Fence that Held the Ocean - In his new book post-retirement, All Might opens up about his regrets, struggles with mental health, and his issues with the hero system as a whole. The backlash is swift and intense.

3. Welcome to the Loud Silence - After an injury, Izuku is rendered deaf.

4. Water Since Turned Red - After a villain attack nearly kills All Might, the beach where Izuku used to go to find comfort now feels tainted.

5. all scrap left untouched is bound together - A group hero students who failed the provincial license exam for the third time, effectively ending their careers before they start, get together to take revenge on UA’s first years who beat them out.

6. You’ve saved more more times than you know - Times All Might saved people without his powers, just by being a cool, nice dude.

7. No Amount of Tragedy Can Justify Your Actions - A dying All for One tries to justify his centuries of cruelty to an uncaring Toshinori.

8. To Leave a Cage Locked - One for All is conscious and has a will of its own, one that doesn’t always line up with Izuku’s wellbeing.

9. Okay, who let in the Kraken? - Izuku is the reincarnation of an ancient eldritch horror.

10. keep us alive up above - Izuku and Shigaraki get trapped together somewhere. Izuku knows he needs the villain’s help to survive and escape, but the other would rather they both die.

11. The world will revolve around me neither less - The ebbs and flows of AFO’s influence over the years.

12. More Roulette, Not Russian - Kids get their quirks swapped.

13. Patron Saints - Toshinori teaches a class about pre-quirk superhero comic characters and their influence.

14. Don't Come Back - Touya Todoroki’s first few weeks after a severe injury resulted in his father abandoning him.

15. The Blessed and the Fool - Toshinori meets up with a few of his ua classmates after retiring.

16. Not Your Sacrifice - Some of the other kids have started adopting some of Izuku’s self sacrificing habits and the teachers are concerned.

17. Break in the Storm - Villains use a power outage as an opening to break into ua.

18. One Day Those Consequences Will Finally Catch Up - Even though the teachers don’t take her concerns seriously, Inko saves every piece of evidence regarding people hurting her son.

19. a garden in their eyes - Izuku meets a fan who got injured after trying to step into a villain fight, just like he did, and it makes him question some things.

20. what could have been, if not for you - After Inko divorces him, Hisashi’s goes to the press to say All Might stole his wife and son.

21. Promised Misery - All Might finds out the severity of Bakugou’s bullying, and warns him he’s on thin ice with him.

22. Fly Up Higher, Blossom Brighter - Izuku has to write a paper for middle school about being positive, intercut with all the bullshit he has to deal with.

23. Libre Me from Hell - One of Izuku’s new quirks is spiral related.

24. No One to Blame but Yourself - Izuku’s kindness doesn’t extend to murderers, tragic backstory or not.

25. At Its Finest - Izuku accidentally gets involved in a hero commission coverup.

26. A Rising Issue - Izuku starts developing more severe side effects of his injuries. He’s convinced he’s under the influence of a quirk, while the adults thing he’s finally gone too far hurting himself.

27. What you are in the Dark - Izuku usually keeps most of his anger to himself until he can’t.

28. nowhere to go - Inko moves into UA after their home was destroyed.

29. Something Without - My theory about the 2 OFA vestiges that are blurred out is they don’t approve of izuku as a successor. Izuku tries to figure out why.

30. Walking with a Ghost - Toshinori joins the OFA dreams while he’s in a coma. He gets to reunite with nana, and is more open to Izuku about his past and feelings. Part of his starts to wonder if it’s worth waking up, since he will die and join the others eventually.

31. Death By Crying - Izuku is affected by a quirk that will suffocate him if he expresses any emotion.

32. Justice is Subjective - The hero commission gets to Shigaraki before AFO does.

33. Undo / Underdog - Death loop fic. Izuku keeps reliving the day he met all might after being killed by the sludge villain. he has to find a way to break the loop and survive, but he gets s little weaker every time he restarts.

34. Like Wildfire - A rumor that Izuku is All Might’s bio son picks up steam, and the characters have to decide whether to deny it but risk suspicion or play along and add a new layer to the lies protecting one for all.

35. Once Upon A December - All Might and Inko actually met in the past trope.

36. Some Legends Are Told - All Might’s first interview post-retirement.

37. Will The Real Mentor Please Stand Up - Aizawa considers himself the better teacher, but a lot of the kids seem to like All Might more.

38. I don't want the cure, I want the POISON! - Inko is killed in a hit and run, and Izuku becomes desperate to find the killer.

39. I will kill my heart before I dance on stage for these bigots - Izuku is interviewed as a rising star of UA, and the interviewer brings in some of his old bullies because they claimed to be his friends from middle school. Izuku does not play along.

40. Split Ends - A quirk gives Izuku brief visions of what would have happened if he made different decisions.

41. Dreamless Sleep - A One for All dream leaves Izuku with a cryptic half-warning, and he desperately experiments to try and figure out how to trigger the visions to get the rest of it.

42. toxic flowers and pretty blades - Young Inko escapes the constricting life of her cruel wealthy family by becoming a vigilante.

43. The Suns we Orbit - Some of the other teachers believe Izuku is too codependent on Toshinori, and separate them for a time.

44. Submerged - Similar to those buried alive fics only someone’s in a box at the bottom of the ocean.

45. Deprive - Izuku also loses his stomach to an injury, and struggles to adjust to the necessary lifestyle changes.

46. The ashes fall like snow - Post Kamino cleanup.

47. Home will always be here - Inko cares for Izuku after he’s sent home due to “trouble at work study” but he refuses to clarify what that means.

48. Playing Favorites - A look at several times where Izuku was punished, while Bakugou got off scot free.

49. Elusive Dreams - Some kind of training or issue forces the kids to stay away for several consecutive day, and they start losing it.

50. Fracture - Izuku struggles through physical therapy after a severe injury that leaves his hero career in question.

51. Starlight, Starbright - Space cadet au

52. Someone in Your Corner - Gran Torino looking after Nana, Toshi, and finally Izuku through the years.

53. I cast magic missile into the darkness - Generic “the gang plays d&d” fic.

54. One Month At A Time - Izuku breaks a limb, and has to let in heal naturally over the course of several months.

55. Head Above Water - Izuku runs out of his pain meds and can’t get access to more doses for a while, so he has to endure not only the pain, but the withdrawal symptoms.

56. Are you going to leave a path to trace - All Might uses a new strategy to try and get Izuku to be less self sacrificial: what about all the young kids who are going to look up to him?

57. The View from Halfway Down - Izuku realizes that a risky move has just landed him with a potentially life threatening injury, but the fight it still going.

58. The Dust Bites Back - A villain All Might defeated early in his career is back and out for revenge.

59. The Absence of your Worth - Nighteye thinks he’s put together a rock solid case for why izuku isn’t worthy of One for All. All Might’s response is to ask if he has something against quirkless people.

60. Behind the Screens Nobody is Afraid - All Might explains some of the context of his most popular hero videos to Izuku. They are much more tragic than the media has spun them in hindsight.

61. Under the Light of the Moon - Someone gets turned into a werewolf. And I ain’t talking the wattpad piss shit. I’m talking full-on back-breaking monstrous transformations into a bloodthirsty abomination set to Bad Moon Rising.

62. some dreams were made to be broken - Bakugou crosses a line and finally gets expelled.

63. You Say You're Into Closure - Izuku finally beats Bakugou in a one on one fight fair and square, but Bakugou is a sore loser.

64. Something or Someone Missing - AU’s memories of Izuku get wiped, but those closest to him can’t help but feel an absence.

65. Too Little Too Late - Izuku’s father returns to find he’s been replaced.

66. Collecting Dust - Inko goes through the stuff Izuku didn’t take to the dorms.

67. Where the souls of wanderers go - Toshi meets up with a retired hero support group.

68. Fragility of Trust - Suspected traitor au

69. no one answered - Izuku is trapped in a cell in a building that’s collapsing in slow motion due to a quirk.

70. Eye of the Storm - One of the other kids has a panic attack for the first time between public appearances. izuku has never seen from from the outside.

71. To Whom It May Concern - The kids find a mysterious collection of letters from previous students hidden in the ceiling of the classroom. Some are ominous, some are incomprehensible. Aizawa has no answers. They enthusiastically go to try and solve the mystery within, but that excitement quickly diminishes the more they find out.

72. Of Popsicles and Ponytails - All Might gets in a discussion with the other teachers about whether the Clark Kent glasses thing would actually work. All Might bets them it does, so he goes around town with no disguise other than his hair being up, and no one bats an eye.

73. All Men are Not Born Equal - Word gets out to the public that izuku used to be quirkless. Everyone finds out just how deep anti-quirkless sentiments run when some begin to question whether a quirkless kid should be at ua, regardless of whether or not he has a quirk now.

74. Childhood is the kingdom where nobody dies - Something about encountering death in person for the first time being the dividing line between child and adult.

75. Sins of the Father - All for One has had many children over the centuries, and has made numerous attempts to groom them into the ideal heir with several different methods. None of them worked though.

76. Where The Dead Come To Rest - The kids come home after a long, grueling mission where they saw some shit, and are too tired to process what they went through. They take off their gear for plain clothes, then sit in the common room in silence long into the night, not wanting to open themselves up but also not wanting to be alone.

77. Rivalry - Nighteye tries to pit Izuku and Mirio against one another. It goes right over Mirio’s head, but Izuku becomes convinced the other boy is in on Nighteye’s plan to wear him down until he gives up One for All.

78. A Subtle Language - All Might and Nana never said out loud that they loved each other, but little things told them that they did. All Might hopes to pass a similar love down to his own successor. But Izuku is very different than himself as a kid, and he needs to learn a new subtle language of affection.

79. It’s Gone - One for All stops working one day.

80. A Sight For Sore Eyes - All Might looking after Izuku in the aftermath of the second movie.

81. Loose Lips (sink ships) - Bakugou blurts out something about One for All during a rage, so the rest of the class jump on him and Izuku for answers.

82. No Expectations - Word gets out that All Might is going to choose a successor. None of the theories or speculation online resemble Izuku in the slightest.

83. Eden was Only a Garden - Izuku gets hit with a quirk that erases some of his most traumatic memories, but in doing so loses part of who he is.

84. Run it Down - With all Izuku’s new quirks and his incredible skill, some of the other students with similar powers (Iida, Sero, Uraraka) start to feel like izuku is upstaging them. And it affects their friendship.

85. Fool's Gold - Bakugou grows even more jealous of Izuku having One for All, and his relationship with All Might. He thinks that if he could just prove himself to be more worthy, All Might would change his mind and name him his successor. But in reality, he ends up jeopardizing the relationship they already have.

86. somewhere down the road - The final deadline for Nighteye’s predictions passes, and All Might lives. He debates telling Izuku, as even though it would be a weight off the boy’s mind, he doesn’t want to jinx it. He will still die eventually after all.

87. Just For You - All Might has certain rules and boundaries for fan interactions that he completely ignores for Izuku.

88. if these walls could talk (their whispers would be maddening) - Montage of training accidents in a ‘cursed’ ua gym

89. If Only I Could... - Nighteye tells Mirio about One for All, including that he thinks he’s more deserving than Izuku and he plans to pressure him into giving it up. Mirio struggles with the knowledge that his mentor, someone he respected more than anything, only saw him as a replacement for All Might, meanwhile watching Izuku strain under the pressure of that mentor’s impossible expectations.

90. This is a Test Designed to Provoke an Emotional Response - shameless Blade Runner AU

91. Once and for All - Retelling of the Superman story “What’s So Funny About Truth, Justice, and the American Way?” with All Might. Some new heroes use much more aggressive and violent tactics against villains while also upstaging All Might. That, and there general approval from the public cause All Might to question his moral code.

92. Sitting In The Rain - Tsuyu likes to just sit out in the rain sometimes. Not do anything, just sit there. Some friends decide to join her.

93. At Sundown - Mysterious creatures start attacking ua every night. The gang works tirelessly during the day to find the cause and a solution, while defending their school and each other at night.

94. The 1000th time's the charm - Uraraka has been practicing a new move in secret but they just can’t get it right. She wants it to be perfect before showing it off. But one attempt gets her seriously hurt while training alone at night in one of the gyms, and she’s too hurt to get up to the phone to call for help.

95. Sunflower Seeds - All Might attempts to start a garden as a new hobby.

96. What It Means To Be Human - Sun god Toshi starts living among people.

97. Eyes on Me - All Might teaches Izuku some unarmed fighting moves to defend himself from bullies.

98. one remains - Izuku has developed all but one of the quirks he’s slated to, and he has no idea what it will be. Anxiety ensues.

99. Come Back Home - Izuku vanishes from campus and everyone assumes he was kidnapped, but in reality he ran away to try and clear his head after a depressive spiral. He goes by train as far away as he can until he comes to his senses and calls the others.

100. I Won - Izuku accidentally managed to kill Shigaraki during a skirmish, and while everyone around him praises his heroics, he struggles to deal with the fact that he killed someone.

101. Ivory Tower - All Might grapples with how much izuku suffered as a quirkless person, how he could have done more for quirkless rights in his time as a hero, and how now people may not care as much because he’s retired.

Reminder to credit me if you use any of these prompts, and a special thanks to everyone who submitted titles!

#mha #bnha #mha prompts #bnha prompts #mha fanfiction #bnha fanfiction #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #dad might #all might #toshinori yagi #midoriya izuku #deku #bakugou katsuki #aconstantstateoffanfiction

346 notes · View notes