#It is what my soul craves
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Hello! I am back from the grave for a Six (Seven?) Sentence Sunday Post!!
Thank you to everyone that has been so kind as to include my in your tag lists despite my silence. @shrekgogurt @artsyunderstudy @ivelovedhimthroughworse @hushed-chorus @j-nipper-95 @martsonmars @ileadacharmedlife @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @palimpsessed @aristocratic-otter @cutestkilla @onepintobean @fatalfangirl @aroace-genderfluid-sheep and @ic3-que3n
It's been a chaotic few weeks - I won't get into the absolute soap opera levels of madness that is my life. But if you've been in my DM's recently, know that I appreciate you infinitely for putting up with me.
So, without further ado, have some sentences from six different projects I've been trying to make progress with :
COBB Project #1
Mordelia saw both her mother and sisters in the aftermath of everything. She has to live with that horror living inside her mind just like I do. I still can’t sleep through the night. It’s impossible to close my eyes and not see their faces in those final moments. The light burned their eyes from the inside as their skin pulled tight from the heat drying them out. Nothing but a husk of a corpse was left behind.
COBB Project #2
As much as mother wishes it were, my heritage is no great secret to me. I know that Malcolm is my father. Which means I know the whole reason we live in the mortal realm is to keep him from controlling our lives. If only my mother would understand that I don’t need her to control my life. Growing up, I quickly realized that the nymphs who I thought were my friends were really nothing more than my guards. Playing with me to ensure that I didn’t leave the land that was under my mothers protection.
Infinity In Your Chest Pocket
(No, this project isn't dead. Just taken a seat on the back burner because I don't know how to not sign up for events with deadlines.)
He has absolutely no table manners – just shoveling the food in his mouth. I want to shove my tongue in his mouth. To lick the syrup from the back of his teeth and get lost in him. The thought isn’t unusual for me. I spend a concerning amount of both my waking and sleeping hours thinking of Simon Snow. Fantasizing about all of the ways he’ll never touch me. It’s probably unhealthy - letting my thoughts run rampant all the time, but if it’s all I’m ever going to get I have to take it.
Mystery Gift #1
The absolute tease. I can't believe that he actually had the audacity to walk across campus with my spunk splattered across his face like that. (I can actually believe it, he has no fucking shame, and it's not like anyone could really see him.) But he knows how I feral I get with him. I hate it. (I don't, I fucking love it, but that doesn't mean I understand it.) Which means he knows exactly what to expect when I get back to our room.
Not so Mystery Gift #2
(I love you, I swear I'll get this done soon for you <3)
"I do believe that I gave you very clear orders today," Erwin practically growls. Pressing impossibly closer and forcing my lower back into the edge of the table. It's impossible for me to not let a sly grin cross my face at his mock fury. "You did." My response only serves to rile him up further as he grabs my chin between calloused fingers and forces my eyes to meet his. "If you can't follow basic commands, maybe I need to put you on a tighter leash."
Gravy
(How did I get here? How did I become a food kink pioneer?)
I'm never going to be able to face Ruth again. Not after having spent all afternoon asking her to help me make a thick gravy worthy of the queen. The gravy is delicious. The queen isn't worthy of it. It's warm and peppery - a deep brown color that stands out against my skin as it drips down my collarbone and chest. Baz doesn't let it drip far though before he's licking it up hungrily. I like to imagine that it's my blood he's lapping up so eagerly.
Tags and Hello's Under the Cut
@bazzybelle @bookish-bogwitch @buffy @captain-aralias @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @confused-bi-queer @ebbpettier @erzbethluna @facewithoutheart @foolofabookwyrm-activated @gekkoinapeartree @henreyettah @ionlydrinkhotwater @johnwgrey @krisrix @larkral @letraspal @moodandmist @mostlymaudlin @prettylightsbigcity @raenestee @skeedelvee @stardustasincocaine @stitchyqueer @tea-brigade @theimpossibledemon @upuntil6am @wellbelesbian @whogaveyoupermission @yellobb
#six sentence sunday#seven sentence sunday#carry on#simon snow#snowbaz#tyrannus basilton grimm pitch#baz pitch#baz#A touch or eruri in there#You think these are all my projects?#Never#I just want to write full time#Let me be an author and just live in the woods with a typewriter#Please#It is what my soul craves#If you're actually curious about the literal never ending drama of my life#There was a lockdown at work for multiple hours#Someone died#A car also died#Someone has cancer#Someone else is just very very ill#Plus I have COVID#And I've put over a 1000 miles on my car this month#Those are just the highlights#I really just need a nap
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won't you dance with this devil?
inspired by this collab:
#my art#love live#love live nijigasaki#setsuna yuki#nana nakagawa#ayumu uehara#setsuayu#nanapomu#ive been like super artblocked for the past month#its like ive forgotten how to draw...#ive been doing my best and ive recovered the drawing part but now it feels like ive forgotten how to colour ahahhah......#ive been doing a lot of small pieces instead of comic work to try to pull myself tgt again#im supposed to be drawing other things but devil ayumu is pretty hot!#anyways devil ayumu x nana is kind of nice#i wonder what kind of plot it'd be#ayumu craving the taste of her soul?#stuco president who has a contract with a demon?
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the dead one. yeah, i havent thought about her in a long time
#what do i need to do to find more angst petrigrof fanfic#i need it i crave it my soul searches for it#anyway its 7am and I havent slept yet#so yeah. not my best one yet but i like it enough to post it#adventure time#at#fionna and cake#fac#adventure time fanart#fionna and cake fanart#fionna and cake spoilers#simon petrikov#simon petrikov fanart#betty grof#petrigrof#art#might delete later
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I miss them
#RAAHHH#i get in these rodydeku moods#and miss them tons but its hard to get what im craving#you feel me#anyways its the usual unfinished bc this is the best i got#and I'll run out of motivation to make it pretty#rodydeku#izuku midoryia#rody soul#pino mha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha#bnha
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"A new tale told through frankly unconventional and doubtful means" - Ikora
"Be sure to suspend your disbelief, guardian" -Eris
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-" -Immaru
For the Fotl event hosted by @d2artevents !
#destiny 2#destiny#destiny art#destiny fanart#my art#destiny 2 art#I'm going to be real with you guys I didn't want to post this one#i opened twitter and saw the wave of layoffs of people being the heart and soul of the game and i just#what's the point#i loved this game and had faith in it because of these people#without them the game is soulless#and what I crave is heart and meaning#not dumb gun fighting#ANYWAYS it sucks
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ummm. my fic is done.
#I mean it still needs a bit of editing but like after almost four months#the hell (writing) is finally over#it's clocking in at around 61k words rn and im tired#time to relax ((cry))#actually you know what. fuck it I'm gonna overshare about this a bit.#I've never written fic before#and besides that - this is the first thing I've sat down to write seriously in about ten years#and ten years ago I was just writing poetry and papers for college#(I don't mean 'just' in a bad way - I only mean that it's been a very different experience for me personally)#very protective over this fic in that it's been sitting in my lap and in my brain for a few months and I don't want to give too much away#so I've deliberately been vague with the marketing of it. because I want people to read and be surprised and experience it firsthand.#and I know it's supposed to be self-indulgent and writing should be about the process and not the results but#I hope people read it??? I've poured my soul into this thing. a bit. a lot. and I'm a simple creature who craves validation.#it's very personal yet at the same time I feel like I haven't done anything new or groundbreaking which. okay it's self-doubt saturday so.#I should ignore that feeling. anyyyyyyyyway.#I hope to post the first chapter in two weeks. crossing my fingers that I don't abort mission before then aaaaaahahaha#also comparison is the thief of joy etc etc etc#danny.xls#danny writes
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thinking about the elections tonight... bad, cellbit, baghera, and forever are four candidates who are devoted to the island- more specifically, to the residents of the island. They care for the eggs, and they care for each other, and the way they exhibit that care through their primary presidential strategies is fucking fascinating.
Bad is who I watch the most, so I know him best. He's a classic mother hen. He doesn't like to take risks with the eggs, and he likes to prepare. If there's any sort of variable that could hurt an egg then he wants to control it. They have a stable relationship with the federation right now- it's not great, but they know the parameters. Don't trust cucurucho. don't follow cucurucho. send the eggs to NINHO every time there's a threat. the time of day changing means you need to run. Other than that they're p okay and roughly safe. But adding a president could potentially change everything. What if the president makes a rule that makes it easier to kill the eggs? And what about the way a president could cause tensions between the players to rise even higher? The dynamics of the island could change drastically. It's safer to neutralize that threat before it ever becomes a threat. It's easier to stop a war before it can start.
Baghera's primary concern is the way the election is designed to pit the residents against each other. All of them know that the Federation is a threat and she, like Bad, is focused on not letting them hurt more people. But, unlike Bad, she's less resistant to change. If the power is spread to multiple players rather than just one, it will be harder for the Federation to corrupt any one of them. Each time before the Federation has gotten to someone it's done so by isolating them. Felps, Cellbit, Jaiden- they've all spent a lot of alone time with Cucurucho. A council isn't just to consolidate the ideals of the island; a council would protect the players themselves. Sure, there might be disagreements and arguments, but they've had those before (and they're having them now!) and there's no reason to think they wouldn't be able to get through them again.
I hit a bit of a wall with Forever and Cellbit's pov here. Everything I know about their plans are from the debates and paraphrased discussions that have been translated here on tumblr, I'm going to talk less about their explicit plan and more about what the result will entail- a single president who takes responsibility for the island. It seems to me like they've recognized the presidential seat as the powerful opportunity that it is, and they want to take advantage of it. Here's some extra personal speculation but, adding rules, adding or removing mods, proposing public works, enforcing laws- those are just the abilities that are listed. Those are incredible opportunities to make the Federation take action, which is more than they've had before. We've seen before that the Federation isn't perfect; the Federation makes mistakes.
By working with the Federation, by making them take action (in a semi-controlled, semi-predictable way) you open them up to more opportunities for them to fuck up (while benefiting you). And, maybe, one of those fuck ups will be the key to taking them down. Maybe they could reopen ender chests. Maybe they could open the nether. Maybe they could learn why the Federation is holding an election in the first place. It's possible to do all these things with Baghera's plan, sure, but that's not a guarantee and, if someone like Bad is on the council, there's absolutely no way to be sure it would get done. And, if there's a council, then that opens up everyone on the council to the Federation's wiles. If there's just one president, then that's where the Federation's focus will be. By using a single person to build a relationship with the Federation, they only risk that single person. By electing ministers instead of a council, they can ensure that the island residents' needs are being heard while placing the federation's focus on that one person. A point can be made that they've done that before- with varying results. like kidnapping. selling your soul. etc. But! overall, I think they've gained more than they've lost by singling out one person. Because of them, we know that Cucurucho can't be trusted. We know that the Federation has a series of tunnels underneath the island. We know that the Federation not only has some sort of cryo technology, but had some unknown reason to use it. We know that there was another person working with Cellbit to take care of Felps (theorized to be ElQuackity), so we know there's at least one more Fed that isn't Cucurucho + blank-faced workers. There's been risk, but there's absolutely been rewards. This is just a very long meandering way to say that their plan to sacrifice Forever to the presidential seat reminds me very much of Cellbit's plan to sacrifice himself to the federation. They're saving their friends by potentially damning themselves and I, for one, think that is cool as hell.
they all care about each other so much. bad's plan means taking on no more risk. baghera's plan means spreading that risk evenly to stand strong together. and cellbit and forever's plan means taking the risk onto themselves so they can reap the rewards for others. am i reading too much into things? no this is tumblr and this smp is about LOVE and i really genuinely think that their election plans are a fantastic example of just how much they love each other
#qsmp elections#qsmp#qsmp analysis#again i haven't been following cellbit and forever's exact plan too closely but i've gotten the sense that their pushing of public works is#just to get people to vote for them and the true reason they want forever to be president is to infiltrate the federation#if that's not it tho feel free to let me know i'd love to know these cubitos reasonings#but with my interpretation i like the silly little extra headcanon of mr cell “sold his soul to the cops” bit#subconsciously sacrificing forever to the feds and pushing him into corruption#which ALSO makes the forever-killing-cellbit-to-kick-him-out-of-the-running plan Even More Tasty#'what if i let you kill me. what if destroying me destroyed yourself. what if i have already destroyed you on purpose and you forgave me#now what if i dont mean it when i do it again'#if anyone wants to examine the other candidates (or these same ones) and figure out how their election strategy is an example of their love#please do#i don't know enoguh about the others#but i know that gegg is love-turned-grief burn-the-world-down#and foolish is love for Item. love for cloud. love for being a silly#i don't know etoiles' plan for if he gets elected but i know he also deeply loves the island and the residents#him and his security <3 and the care packages for new players <3 and the way he Craves Violence but absolutely refuses to hurt anyone who#doesn't deserve it. most guy of all time#personally i want foolish to win because i think it would be really fun#but i think that any of them (even the candidates i don't know) would be a Fantastic president#we're going to get some good roleplay any way it goes so ill be happy :3#the only mechanic thing i want is for them to open the nether but that feels like a given for anyone so im not worried about it tbh#ty for coming to my tedtalk#hello if you're reading this tag. i see youre just as un-normal about these characters as i am. or you just like to read. respect either wa
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entering my witchy era y’all like actually and I’m so excited 😭
#excited to see what’s to come#excited to learn new things#and hopefully make some new connections as well#my soul has been craving this for a while now
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🤭🤭🤭🤭 PC Kyman
The immense joy and satisfaction I felt when I received this request 😎🔥🔥
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my indulgent version 2 for @yeonban
Xue Yang grimace as he grips the edge of the sink, hunched over as he closes his eyes. Great. The word is bitter and angry in his mind. This self-appointed mission had been practically pointless and to top it all off, it seemed like Jin Guangyao was passing through the city. So the whole place is the human equivalent of someone kicking a massive hornet's nest. Frankly, Xue Yang can't be blamed for not knowing about the other's traveling plans for some clan event even if they were announced - he never kept up with the cultivators when he was a guest disciple, let alone now that he's supposed to be DEAD. But as he likes to say, he's going to make Death fight tooth and nail to drag him to hell. He was supposed to be dead for years now. Xue Yang IS dead as far as the world is concerned. Most of the world hadn't ever known he existed in the first place.
MAYBE he'd taken a distant peak at the heart of the city just for a glimpse. Xue Yang hadn't gone close ; he'd observed from the safety of the shadows far away. Now that he reflects on it, maybe that could have attracted attention from an eagle-eyed observer. Most other people has surged to the street for a glimpse while he'd stayed away. It's the only reason Xue Yang can think of for suddenly having someone try to follow him later. It was a LAUGHABLE attempt, but it had been rather NICE to slaughter and mangle the unfortunate fool. The dogs on the street were having a nice feast tonight.
It doesn't matter. Xue Yang will leave before the sun rises and this place on the outskirts of town doesn't ask for names or information. Xue Yang shoves off his outer robes and shirt, eyeing the ugly bruises and scars - blood from his earlier slaughter staining his collarbones while a fresh, recovering injury on his lower back has seeped through the messy, sloppy bandaging. More than that, though Xue Yang watches when the door. Age and time has only sharpened his already uncanny ability to sense danger. The door silently opens but he's already waiting with a skull piercing nail in hand. He throws it when a hooded figure steps in and watches it embed itself deep into the wood while the figure doesn't flinch.
Xue Yang hates that it means nothing. Nothing, because Xue Yang knows who that is. Nothing, because they both know if Xue Yang really meant it, he wouldn't have missed.
" Oh? Is this one worth a visit from an old friend? " Xue Yang flashes his teeth in a dangerous grin, and nearly wants to bark with laughter at the insanity of this situation. Jun Guangyao's too smart for his own good. Suddenly the fool earlier seems like a greeting - or a test to see if Death would appear in monstrous violence, a telltale sign of Xue Yang. Damn. Well played. He licks his teeth, head cocked to the side with a smirk.
XUE YANG. He hasn't heard his own name from someone else in YEARS. His smirk freezes, eyes focused intently on the man in front of him. His jaw clenches, unclenches, and clenches again. He's not mad though, or else violence would have already revealed itself. He doesn't know what he feels. He ALMOST wants to plead to hear his name again, and isn't that pathetic? It digs up the ugliness in his chest - the wrathful resentment that even temporary happiness hadn't been able to crush. Xue Yang didn't exist in Yi City until he was synonymous with death and disaster descending. It wasn't XUE YANG that was happy, just a nameless stranger. Now Xue Yang is alive, brought back on gilded tongue.
He couldn't care less about the blood or injuries that the other can see in the mirror or on him. There's no way he'd actually be here. It's probably just an illusion or talisman or something. Meng Yao is probably very comfortably lounging in some overly extravagant bed in one of the fancy buildings and whatever else clan leaders do. Xue Yang never has and never will care. Maybe he should be envious, but he'd never taken well to formalities even when he'd been with the Jin clan. A wild animal is still wild even in a sanctuary. So when Meng Yao says something about tending to wounds that Xue Yang waves off, ( some things never change ) , Xue Yang merely rolls his eyes. An illusion or projection can't do anything other than lecture.
Except Meng Yao can touch him and illusions can't do that. The warmth of fingers on his skin almost feels like FIRE. Xue Yang's head snaps towards the other and stares dumbfounded when the stained, messy bandages are yanked away and cold fabric washes away the blood at the injury he can't reach himself. ( Another eventual scar most likely given Xue Yang's lack of care to it. ) His mouth is suddenly dry. He's not afraid even though this is a DANGEROUS spot to be in. Part of him wants to shove Meng Yao away, to grab his few things and flee. Part of him just finds RELIEF that someone knows him. He wants to talk. He wants to run. He's suspicious. He's.....tired. In the end, Xue Yang finds himself just standing there and letting Meng Yao do as he pleases with a sharp eye following his every move.
" Ow- Ow! Hey! " Xue Yang is all skin and bones and raw power packed into muscles. His lower back muscles twitch under the cleaning and it fucking hurts. Yet even he knows better than to reject this help. ( Because who willingly helps Xue Yang? No one. And who does Xue Yang allow to help him? No one. Except, evidently, one lone soul who is the answer to both. ) " This is MY room you know. Showing up here and immediately in my stuff. " He scoffs and glares at Meng Yao in the mirror but he doesn't stop him or make any move to hurt him. He clicks his tongue. " You shouldn't be here you know. " Pot calling the kettle black, really. Neither of them should be here. It abruptly brings back a much earlier memory of them slinking around Jin Guangshan's hidden rooms where they shouldn't be, plotting a demise. He shakes his head slightly, knuckles white as he grips the counter. Fine, maybe it's a bit worse than he'd care to admit. " Guess this is rather fitting a reunion though, huh? " He grins, sharp again. He can't exactly imagine a TYPICAL reunion. Not for them. Xue Yang wouldn't ever change that.
#yeonban#i had the scene in mind#but then GETTING to that i was like 'ah that needs exposition'#and uhhhhhh here we are#IDK CHRIS I WAS JUST THINKING#during the like what 8 years give or take between everything and then yi city arc just reuniting#and also the different kind of dynamic even something as simple as washing blood away can be#xy had improved his self-care exactly 0% since they were younger#to no ones surprise#hearing his name really shook him#he v much just Yearns to hear it again and TALK#with someone who ACTUALLY knows its him#in my defense i apparently wrote most of this while half asleep#and too much work to just erase#i had something else to say but i forgot hgjfdg#᛭ — [IC] poisoned soul craving the taste of blood [XUE YANG]
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Arcane is so good, i often wish it actually had a story based game, instead of whatever LOL is...
#personal#idk all the terms asdfgh#but i always preferred story centric games#and i cant cope the 2nd season is also the last#like boi so many cool female characters the animation and art#netflix disappoints me a lot but from all streaming services#it at least still offers the most diversity in whatever form#idk what disney produces all but somehow it just feels like marvel and star wars alone#also yes i bawled my soul out#i swear i crave happy ends
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This meme except I get to choose the characters to smash my art block. Fun game, tell me what you think what I’m like (for better or for worse) based on these guys.
Friend-endorsed: "I don't know nausicaa or roxy but the rest are very accurate i think"
#other friends had other variations of ' i don't know all ylthe source media but based on the ones i do know...yeah '#what on earth do these characters have in common? they are Just Like Me FR#what could i possibly be like in real life? confused.#Is this what the kids call a kin list…#httyd#gravity falls#homestuck#studio ghibli#mlp fim#bobs burgers#family members have compared me to like paul pfeiffer. alex dunphy. george michael bluth. politely disagree.#because usually the extent of the comparison is that the character is Book Smart (TM)#Or sweet and fumbly/anxious#even if there's not much else there#however they lose their minds when we watch Bob's Burgers because i am Very Tina in many ways#not the boy crazy thing at all#but vibeswise im tina all the way down just quite a bit more personable#which is flattering bc i love her#i identify with hiccup very much in a lot of ways but i lack the impulsivity. i have a dipper/twilight need to plan everything meticulously#i think deep in my soul i crave novelty but i also have Quite A Bit Anxiety Disorders#if you put stock in personality tests im infj and 9w1#idk that any of these guys are either of those. maybe with their strengths and weaknesses combined#you could distill Me#so anyway i guess i have this instead of carrd. this actually is all you need to know#oh actually tina is infp and 9w1 so very very close#nausicaa is enfj and 2w1 which is close as well#i always test extremely borderline almost 50/50 on thinking/feeling#abd like 60/40 introvert/extrovert#i LOVE people. love them. just not all at once#are mtbi and enneagram definitive measures of a person? no. are they fun? hell yes
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I think Khai is the "Seat of Azem" WoL in his party, which means I have to come up with some reason why Zenos fixates on him instead of the sparkly pink murderpixie he travels with.
#khaidai gharl#lolovi lovi#lolovi 'MOTHER I CRAVE VIOLENCE' lovi#lovi wakes up every day ready to throw down#the dotharl stake a claim on her soul nigh-instantly; they are SURE she's either one of theirs or will be soon#so what on earth makes zenos look at khai's blossom-withering-in-the-sun ass#and think 'i will restructure my entire identity around the idea of an ultimate fight with this man'
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Friendly reminder to myself to not destroy things I make just because it feels embarrassing at the time of creation - one day I will want to look back on the things that took up my time in that period of my life
I will forever mourn the approximately one hundred pages of backstory I wrote by hand in several dedicated notebooks for my oc Auphelia when I was a teenager.
#i burned that shit like a madman over a bonfire and everything#reminder to self#creation is baring your soul and that's scary#but finding little pieces of yourself when you come back to it can feel so good#seeing where you were and what mattered at that point and comparing to the present is such a feeling#something i crave lately#i just want to dissect my brain okay#at this point it might as well be literally as metaphorically
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My stupid ass really thought Maksi was gonna drink water. Like my first thought was “What a kind and thoughtful fella to offer him a lil break”. 💀
#IF YOU KNOW YOU KNOW#nsft humor#ramblings#yes this is about crave saga#I was down for seeing everything else EXCEPT that XD#the artist did do a great job with CG if that’s what y’all are into#now excuse me while I look at makeup to cleanse my soul lmfao XD
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Getting into tos means that every time I see anything referring to Kirk, Spock, and Bones as the triumvirate, all I can think is "ah, yes, their trine"
#I'm sorry but seeker trines as a relationship type is too deeply ingrained in my head now#doesn't help i was reading the star trek wiki page about mind melds (as one does) and the term gestalt was used#i am and forever will be drawn towards weird alien bonds it's what i love it's what a crave#shoving two or more brains/souls/whatever together? fuck yeah I'm eating it up
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