#It is not a sign of good mental health 😔

[daz4i]

thank god they're adding more divergent universe rewards next patch so i can keep doing it without feeling like i'm wasting my time

[sh1-n0bu]

Can u do yandere Beel-obey me with a impulsive/lil crazy mc/reader? In a minute she is calm and in the other she tries to kill a random demon. May u can do him a lil masochist too? Pretty pleaseee 🙏

✿ 𝙨𝙝𝙚’𝙨 𝙘𝙧𝙖𝙯𝙮 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙨𝙝𝙚’𝙨 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙚 ✿

characters: yandere!beel x fem!reader

warnings: generally darker undertones bc it’s a yandere, description of fighting, injuries, mentions of blood, yandere thoughts and acts, masochism, hinted that mc have signs of anger issues and bipolarity, some suggestive things

notes: ‘m so so so sorry for the late response hun. i just couldn’t rlly think of a good scenarios for this one😔 hope it’s to your liking!

everyone experiences bipolarity and anger issues differently. i am no mental health expert and i wrote this with my own anger issues experience and a friend's bipolarity. if some things seem wrong or unlikely then pls let me know.

since mc is literally living with demons, there definitely will be some darker/gruesome moments brushed off as a normal thing bc they’re demons

so with that in mind, being possessive, protective, a bit too overbearing or controlling is seen as a normal thing in a relationship for them

however beel is much more chill and softer when it comes to such things

it’s bc he has great GREAT amount of trust in you plus he knows no sane, lower demon would never dare and approach you

either bc of the pact markings of the 7 demon lords of devildom or

your impulsive self.

yep.

that’s the reason.

at first meeting and the first few days or weeks into mc’s stay in devildom, the brothers either find mc’s impulsiveness and anger issues relatable, amusing or just downright annoying

as for beel he didn’t really care. as long as you didn’t get yourself killed or gravely injured

if anything in the beginning it low-key reminded beel of his twin, belphie

mc’s dark humor, threatening back demons about how they will puck out their teeth, boil it into a soup and shove it down their throat while it’s still steaming hot were first annoying to most of the brothers

however to beel, it just reminded him of how his brother would always snap back at the other demons and more specifically, lucifer

perhaps that little resemblance is what led beel to be protective and possessive over mc

it started out slow and barely noticeable lingering hands over their shoulders, small worried glances, giving them ice package to put over their bruised knuckles

soon it developed into beel constantly hovering around mc, threatening to eat the other lesser demons who even dared to gaze at them to scenting

when scenting your partner in a demon relationship, it usually involves leaving visible marks on each other since demons all have different distinguishable markings

whether it be carving their marks into their s/o’s flesh with their claws, leaving a bloody bite mark or sometimes even their pact markings on each other

however, considering the fact beel is more gentler than the other demons and your a human, he simply decided that cuddling with you for so long to the point that others could smell beel’s sin and scent on you or just draping his large, fluffy orange jacket over you was enough

unfortunately, demons are beings that generally have a darker mindset than humans so one day some lesser, cocky demon mocked you for being “beel’s pet” while you were alone

mc paid that demon back with a broken nose and a broken arm that bent the wrong way (like this __^__🫴)

the terrified screeching of the onlookers and the anguish filled cries of the cocky bastard alongside the blood dripping from the claw marks the demon left on mc called upon the attention of the brothers

when arriving at the scene beel couldn’t help but feel an odd feeling within him

something hot, mushy and dizzying feeling pooling in his stomach, his mind getting hazy, eyes half lidded with the only focus of attention being on you

asmo sensed his brother’s sudden arousal and dragged him off from the crowd, sitting him down in one of the empty classrooms and having a talk with him. helping him calm down and explaining to his little brother that sometimes people get aroused by people who are stronger than them

since that little incident with mc and the cocky demon, beel has never went a day without his mind wandering to the scene he saw

you standing tall and proud with a bloody claw mark running from your chin to your neck with an odd triumphant grin while the lower insect screeched, holding his broken arm

and when he lets his daydreaming go wild, the sixth brother finds himself fantasizing about you sitting on him with the same grin, carving your initials on his chest

the scent of blood oozing around the room, the quiet giggles that would slip out of your lips as he groans and whimpers at the odd yet pleasant feeling

and when his imaginations go further than that, the avatar of sin of gluttony finds himself choking on his breath, pants tightening and the room feeling hotter than the usual

perhaps paying a visit to your room this night won’t be such a bad idea…

[scrumptiousstuffs]

yknow what i want for fk? more shows. PUT THEM IN INSANE HET SHOWS I BEG 😭 no more one bl a year i need them in a show in every part gmmtv announces shows in. i would literally pay for home school 2 for insane khao. i would pay gmmtv for insane first in a show. LET THEM PLAY INSANE CHARACTERS. FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH.

gmmtv's het shows are so underrated because those things are way more unabashedly queer even compared to a lot of bl's they produce <- preaching like im from the missionary of 'gmmtv het show are gay af' alliance

(i just love the het shows and will take any moment to talk about it. like yea ofc theres stupid ones but some of them are just so fucking good and made with so much love and passion and its so visible and it makes me so soft 🥺)

- burnsuncomet (they should really let me ask stuff from my sideblog smh 😔)

Go on. Tell me more about what het shows you like from GMMTV (and why you like them). And tell me what ideas do you want for your het shows for FK?

I personally enjoyed Home School (so I am definitely on board with Khaotung versus Gun for season 2!) , Midnight Museum, Enigma (for a horror show, this pack a lot more than just good special effects) and the currently airing Peaceful Property (which we are still debating whether it’s BL or not 😂).

And I cannot stress enough how much 55:15 Never Too Late is such an underrated gem (yes it has a side BL featuring our own Khaotung who nailed his role as SongPol/Paul) but my other fav storyline in that show was View’s character and the friendship between Paul and Piploy’s character.

I didn’t mind Summer nights but I got terribly bored by Phuwin (and whoever his love interest was) - and really just perked up when Dunk’s character White and Lookjun interacted.

And if you are asking me what het shows I’m looking forward from GMMTV - Hide & Sis (it has Jan, Piploy and Lookjun plus Chimon playing a sleaze ball? - sign me up!)

But I’m digressing - we are talking about FK hehe. I admit I was disappointed when they only have one project for 2024, which has yet to air 🥲 (especially after getting spoilt with 3 shows from them in 2023 😩).

I think FK is under utilised by GMMTV (but then again, don’t we all say the same when talking about our own bias CPs?) - I want them to be in reality show, talk shows, V-log ANYTHING really beyond just one BL cause they have so much potential (we are definitely in agreement with this. Although it’s of course not feasible to have everything for the boys cause they will burnout otherwise 🙂‍↕️). But we can all dream yeah?

Anyway, I thought this user from Twitter has the cutest idea ever for their YT content 👇🏽 (credit on the screenshot)

(Or I take the boys going camping together with us watching them cook and playing guitar and toasting marshmallows by the campsite)

In my alternate reality where FK gets to act more than one BL per year, these are my pick for hetero show/concept with FK in it:

The currently aired “The Judge from Hell”, k-drama starring Park Shin Hye and Kim Jae Young. I want a Thai remake - with Piploy as the devil in the judge’s body (she plays beautiful evil/anti-hero well! - her performance in Enigma was a good example of this) and First as our dutiful cop who joined force (literally selling his soul) to the devil after his mother figure got killed by a serial killer who also killed his birth parents. We know First can play tortured and devastation well, but truly seeing him fight to keep his morality? - 🤌 (also First already looks like a Korean movie star, so he will fit in well! Plus not going to lie - a tall First having to lean down on tiny Piploy while they bicker and fall in love 🤭 (these 2 have quite the chemistry in The Shipper)

As for Khaotung (we already mentioned Home School), but if I want to see him in a hetero couple - it will be with Ciize. These 2 were wholesome together in Tonhon Chonlatee (the show has flaws, but I still enjoyed it and Khaotung/Ciize being besties in that show was one of the highlights for me!)

And again, I’m borrowing this from one of my favourite k-drama, Happiness (2021) featuring Park Hyung-Sik and Han Hyo-Joo. Beyond just a zombie flick, it’s a commentary on social class but also the desperation and the length people go to when trapped with no where to go. Also, I won’t lie, I just want to see Khaotung (now that he is so buff!) and Ciize (despite her tiny frame) being badass with guns- it also has a sweet romance line between the main characters 😂

And bonus - if I can make my own FK-centric drama:

I want them to play cross-lovers in the past but one of them was a woman.

They both reincarnated - the woman’s soul now in one of the boys (I haven’t quite figure out who I want to play this role between them 🤣). This soul remembers his previous life and lover but avoids trying to look for him (cause you know, she is now a he and thought his previous lover is straight)

While the other person - knows he is missing someone, he has a deep yearning for this one person. However, he can’t remember the face or really anything beyond vague flashbacks except he knows it is a she. So he keeps looking at girls of course not finding the one. Meanwhile, fate (of course) made them meet and they keep avoiding trying to not fall in love but fail 🤷🏽‍♀️. I have even thought of what jobs these boys could have, the side characters 🤣…but alas, this will stay in delulu land (and yes, if you think the plot sounds vaguely familiar, it likely is! Cause I just pick all the plots/tropes I like and meshed it up!)

[katyspersonal]

In today's SoTE progress: ARRRGHHH I am SO goddamn angry!!!! Gfhghmjm But also I am thinking about Messmer and Marika a LOT now.

1) So, I was getting mentally prepared for going to battle Messmer, and decided to visit just one last piece of fort associated with his location!

^ This shield was dropped by a Black Knight Garrew that acted like a boss but was no harder than a regular enemy. He was using a Crucible aspect that gave him chameleon's shooting tongue to attack with and I hoped he'd drop it instead hfhghgj I'm gonna assume it was somewhere in the game and I just missed it for a dumb reason :pensive:

^ A valid reference in case if anyone will want to draw/write certain grim scenes in detail or something like that

2) There was also a fairly well-hidden secret that I felt proud of discovering, but it was just a stronger version of the talisman that makes arrows stronger! And not only I don't use bows, but also it didn't even give lore! Goddamn it Fromsoft reward me with INFORMATION for my explorer's interest!!

3) Okayyyy sooo :/ I was soooo ready to get my ass kicked by Messmer that I kinda dreaded it, but needed to get this over with! Alas, DLC should end sooner or later...

And at first, I did get my ass kicked, sure. But..... ...not only he switched to the second phase halfway through his health bar and not after it was fully reduced like I expected.. but also I adopted OBNOXIOUSLY fast. :/ :/ :/ It didn't take me EVEN 15 MINUTES to fully adapt to him and just get closer and closer with every try. And!! I did kill him? Like are you JOKING. Are you KIDDING me. That was IT? It took me several days and tormenting @fantomette22 for useless tries to finally defeat Rellana, I had to try many strategies and be extremely smart and inventive with her!! I thought if she was so strong, Messmer would have been even WORSE, and yet I am just sitting here like:

Dude yeah no SHIT you needed Rellana to protect you :/ Guess I was not impressed by 18 inches of Messmer the Impaler 😔😔😔

4) Okay but I DID like his voice acting a lot hfhgv I was just sitting there like "stop sounding sexy you dunce, I already decided that I'm going to dislike you!" XD /j

5) His final words were "Mother... Marika... A curse... upon thee..." and.. hell if I know whether he cursed us or her. I am assuming he cursed her since switching to calling your parent by name instead is a kind of strong sentiment. Like defying them their status over you sort of. Besides all the statues of her in Shadow Realm but one being headless. So... yes, interesting.

6) It was not patched out btw! :>

7) Okay actually when I was about to beat Messmer's ass for good I've accidentally found the summon sign for Hornsent NPC! I was not seeing it during the fight, just happened to run into it, and if Igon taught me anything is that such summons are a good idea because they progress the questline. Maybe. So, he gave a dialogue after Messmer was defeated:

"We meet again I see, comrade-in-arms. Upon his end, did you see Messmer's face? Twas sublime - a very tangle of snakes! To think he dared to call us savages. When he himself was most base of all.

To say the least, I am to you indebted. Yet unquenched remains my thirst for revenge. The death of Messmer was merely the start. Now comes the piper to collect from Marika, her offspring, and all the Erdtree's denizens... In vengeance for the flames, my blade I wield... If Miquella's redemption soothes the ache... that throbs within, demanding blessed vengeance... Then I wish not to be by him redeemed."

Sigh... I just can tell that the guy will have to turn on us sooner or later. Honestly, rejection of anything that could help/heal/etc the pain that demands revenge is such a... real reaction? He is a very real character. He straight up doesn't want to stop even after achieving his objective and himself, ironically, fell for the path of punishing every associate including innocent people whose only sin is being "born in this culture". He became like Marika in this regards!

Honestly, this is a very good writing moment! Second favourite after Miyazaki's jab at horrors of believing in "sacred mission" in Crusader's Insignia! (I like the character even more now for very real negative character development, but I just can TELL we'll have to kill him gfhhgg)

8) .... ah, right, I forgot this post about Messmer

Again: hatred like what? Hatred coming from Abyss Serpent? His hatred for Marika? Hatred for all divested of her grace? Hatred for himself? Is this many things? Fromsoft spare me I am too autistic to read hfggjhgjgb

9) This is actually sweet:

So, the snakes were friends all along, and I suppose the counterparts/antagonists to the "evil" serpent within him!

10) *points at this like in the meme* Hey I remember that this bit was mistranslated! XD

It actually says that he did that for his mother's sake, and not by her wish! It makes even more sense with the following sentence, as if HE really wished for no single mfer to look weird at her. No, as if he INSISTED to accept all blame and hatred. Considering he curses her in his dying breath, after all (or at least calls her name which is a bad sign from a child), there must have been such a long build-up of unhealthy relationship between them to it...

He not only wished to keep her away from all fear and hatred that follows, and fulfill her vengeful desires, but also basically said to use him like a punching bag. But if she feared the curse within him in the end, then SHE is to blame that he gave up on any and all hope to be pure, good and loved. Like.. whose fault do you guys think it IS that his self-image centered entirely on being fear and dread, as well as someone to hate? I have an impression that he did want to take the blame and excile for her sake, but also resented that she actually accepted his request to use him. Like.. maybe he didn't even realize that what he, subconsciously, wanted was for her to refuse. I might be speaking from too much personal experience, but sending such mixed signals (requesting something with expectation that the person will refuse) is a sign of bad parenting at least, abuse at most. And knowing Marika's horrid parenting skills... yeeeeah.

Again, really good writing. They are saying so much with so little, as always. Glad that Mister Miyazaki keeps the mark with his stories only being readable if you have at least one PTSD ggbhjghbb

11) I have a bad guess that they did not elaborate on what exactly Abyss Serpent is, otherwise @val-of-the-north would've already spoilered me because we love worldbuilding xd

But seeing how Marika Had a Moment about Giants' Fire all because it's capable of burning the Erdtree, the reason is probably similar. She I with Fire like Gwyn is with darkness: it can end her era, maybe end herself, so it is terrifying.

At the same time, she was trying to love her children, at least at first. She created this eye for Messmer and created a lot of Divine Blessings to ease his burdens in the past. Then there were Omen Twins that she yet named with her initials and at least Godfrey and Godwyn were seeing them, although horned creatures would be her worst nightmare. I feel like the pipeline from this to "children become kings or lords or else you'll only be worthy of sacrifices" + "unwanted bastard in Mausoleum" was a long one. She tried to love even the children that were either a walking hazard or walking PTSD, but failing to overcome fear before Messmer set her down the spiral. God, I can see all of her snapping if Messmer asked too many questions, accidentally acting hostile if he tried to be physically affectionate unable to conceal her fear fast enough... She would not be the type to try again with anyone after casting him aside in the end, but, she would take the passive position of "kids, prove me that you deserve my love because ME putting in effort won't avail anything, apparently". The guilt but one that made a quitter rather than a better person.

12) Also *points like in the meme again*

Yeah, every forge type of the dungeon in Shadow Realm has throwing weapons!!! He adapted!

__________

So yeah this post gotten EMOTIONAL ALL OF A SUDDEN when I expected it to be short. Damn, the girls didn't lie, he IS an interesting character!

[lowkeyrobin]

hey! (just wanna say I really love your writing and especially the ones on mental health)

could I ask for more of the reactions to an Australian accent, but with the cricket crew instead? (those who are okay with x reader ofc)

tysm!!! have a wonderful day!

ah omg thank you 🫶🫶🫶 I've been working really hard esp on those ones + the fact I've always kinda struggled w mental health stuff so I rlly pour my heart out into those ; and he's of course!! sorry if I misunderstood you on that last one by the way LMAO ; gonna keep this as a oneshot tho because it was way easier than a preference format for some reason ; also I wish we got more freddie, tommy, tubbo & ranboo pics while we could 😔🙏

HANDSOME BROS ; australian accent

summary ; youre the only aussie in a group of british kids (and an american)

warnings ; language, lots of ball jokes (sorry tommy)

word count ; 1.4k

masterlist

Showing up for Tubbathon 2024 was a wild one.

Having your hand duct taped to Tommy's was also a whole thing in itself. At least you weren't working with Ranboo, who had no idea how to cook, unlike their poor partner Freddie. Recipe For Disaster was probably a horrible idea to join.

You and Tommy, Green Team, versus Ranboo and Freddie, Orange Team.

You'd never really talked on stream before. You either communicated through Minecraft signs or in-game chats. If you did speak, however, you'd often use a voice changer to make you seem a little more understandable, as you knew your accent was a bit difficult to understand sometimes.

You'd also met with your friends in real life before, of course, but you made sure the entire trip you strained your voice to sound a little more understandable.

But, now cooking with one of your long-time friends, the big guy TommyInnit himself, you didn't seem as worried or insecure when you spoke. I mean, you'd barely spoken, but you were in a comfortable environment - Tubbo's house - and were accompanied by friends you'd known for a long time now.

The stream had started and Tubbo had explained your rules, leaving the two groups to get to cooking.

"Hey, mate, can you hold the bowl while I stir the eggs?" You kindly ask Tommy, wriggling a whisk out of the jar between the stations.

The blonde blinks in silence, staring at you, "Your accent went 0 to 100 very quickly, Y/n/n" He giggles.

"Wait, what?" You glance about, feeling a little nervous as you plop the whisk into the measuring cup, needing to stir the eggs.

"Not in a bad way! Like, I never noticed your fuckin' accent was so, like, heavy before? You didn't sound like that last time we met up, or talked" He shrugs as he explains himself.

"Oh" You shrug, watching as he secures his free hand around the handle of the glass measuring cup. You begin to whisk the eggs, poking at the yolks to make it go a little bit faster. "I mean, I usually use a little voice changer to make me a little more understandable"

"Ohhhhh, wait, that makes sense" He nods, "Ow! Calm down, I'm not trying to get surgery on my wrist now!" He quickly pulls his hand away, feeling something pop.

"Shit, I'm sorry! Are you alright?"

He bites his tongue, nodding as you reach for his hand. "I'm good"

You gently grab his wrist, quickly and lightly kneading the area for him.

Ranboo looks up, seeing you two distracted in your green aprons. "They're taking a massage therapy break already" they comment, tapping Freddie on the shoulder.

"C'mon, man up, Tommy! You'll be okay" Freddie lightly smiles, cracking a few eggs over the measuring cup, which they'd just struggled to find.

"Dude, I just had surgery on my crowned jewels, I don't think I will!"

"Good God, help me now" You chuckle

Ranboo and Freddie go silent for a moment before the boy with the red hair speaks up.

"You weren't kidding about the voice changer, were you?"

You shake your head no, "Why would I lie about that, mate?"

The two shrug, hearing Tubbo fake yell at them for cheating since they were conversing with you. The four of you jokingly plan a rebellion that you'd put into place for later, deciding to focus on the food right now.

"Tommy, Tommy, the plate, not the floor! If you drop that I'll actually kill you"

"It's on the damn plate!"

Tommy quickly sets the pan down to help you fold the guacamole together, using his one hand to hold the bowl while you rushingly mix it all up. From the avocados to the lemon juice, you got it to a nice consistency, and, with a struggle, get a dab of it on the paper plate you were given next to the burrito.

"I think he's gonna like it either way, considering most of what he eats, he orders." You shrug, setting the bowl of guacamole down.

Tommy lightly laughs, "Yeah, that's true"

You were finished before the timer, luckily, however, Freddie and Ranboo were still working, using each hand to do their own tasks to work a little faster.

"Tubbo, can you understand me with my accent this thick?" You shout into the other room, purposely making your voice and accent sound a bit thicker to try and mess wirh him.

It's silence until he answers, like he needed to translate your words. "Barely!"

You and Tommy laugh, chatting away while the other group works.

"What's Australia even like? Just like... giant spiders and kangaroos?"

"Holy shit"

"I'm serious! It's not like I'm going anytime soon"

"Well, it's not that. It's like the UK but much warmer, and yeah, kinda scarier. It's like a real-life Better Minecraft mod"

"You guys have armored skeletons attacking you??" Tommy laughs as he teases you.

"I hate you!" You laugh

"I love how you say 'you', it sounds so dumb"

"It sounds like how you Brits say it!" You smile, using your free hand to try and fight him in a playful manner.

"Dumb in a nice way! Dumb in a nice way!" He shouts, trying to use his free hand to protect himself from the cat fight. "They weren't lying when they said you Aussies fight like wild animals, what's next, you gonna kick the shit out of me?" He asks, egging you on.

"I'm gonna kick you in the crown jewels if you don't shut up!" You joke, making him scream in terror, probably killing the viewers' ears as well.

He yelps, falling back as he drags you down with him, having slipped on himself.

"Tommy!"

"Ow!"

"Jesus Christ, they've broken each other's backs off that floor, I heard it" Freddie lightly laughs, holding the paper plate up for Ranboo so they could put the food on it. "I think Y/n's dead"

"Tubbo! We need the ambulance!" Ranboo laughs, "Get Eryn back here, they actually can't get up! The tied hands have impaired them tremendously"

"Tommy, just stand up!"

"My balls hurt!"

"Then let me stand up, I can't when you're holding your dick together!"

Eryn quickly rushes over, helping the both of you stand up slash getting Tommy to release his tied hand from his crotch. You help him up and pat him on the shoulder with your free hand as Tubbo wraps up the time.

In the end, your groups nearly tied, you and Tommy one point behind Freddie and Ranboo. Honestly, they did deserve the win.

"I still can't believe you fooled us with the voice changer, even changing your voice in real life. I swear, you sound totally different," Freddie lightly chuckles, freeing himself from the apron.

"In a good way, though" Ranboo adds, "Your accent is really fucking cool, trust me"

You lightly smile, freeing yourself from Tommy's sweaty hands. "Thanks- ow, holy shit!"

"You think that hurt?" The blonde teases, having ripped the rest of the duct tape of your hands.

"Piss off"

After the stream ended, Tubbo turned on some music while you guys cleaned up. He and Eryn were sorting out the lights, cameras, and microphone while the four of you cleaned up the kitchen. You decided to clean each other's messes, trying to make it a little more enjoyable, which none of you minded.

The music, picked my Tubbo himself, was an early 2000s hip hop mix, titled something like 'Greatest 2000s Hip Hop Hits' or something. And of course, Ranboo and Tommy were getting down to it, mostly leaving you and Freddie to do the cleaning while you laughed at them singing and dancing along.

Tommy was bouncing around, not focused on cleaning whatsoever as he tugs on your hand, wanting you to join in.

"Y/n, Freddie, cmon!"

"This isn't High School Musical, dude" You reply

"You deserve a break!" Ranboo shouts, pulling Freddie into whatever fucked up dance trapezoid you guys had going on.

You sigh and set down the cups you were washing and turn the water off. You spray the water from your hands on Freddie, starting a war as you join their little dance party.

Freddie gasps and smiles, throwing the little bit of water in the measuring cup at you in retaliation.

"Australian versus Brit! Who will win!?" Tommy shouts with a little laugh.

"Hopefully not the American"

You fake shudder and nod. "Yeah, I agree with that, Ranboo"

[princess-of-the-corner]

The Lost Fic 😔

Okay, This is me just spewing what I remember of that fic I mentioned earlier, cause it was real good, and I want to share. If anyone finds the guy who wrote it, or a reupload or something, send the link/name, this thing was real good!

So, like, I forget the exact starting point, but in this fic, Emilie and Gabriel swap roles, so Gabe’s the one dying from the Peacock, and Emilie is the one left behind. So, Gabe uses the Peacock to impregnate Emilie, so they can have Adrien. I think there was a plot point of how Colt used it first to impregnate Amelie, and that’s how it got broken? Like Amelie and Emilie are thinking about using the Peacock so they can have kids, and Colt and Amelie use it first to see if it works, because Emilie had, like, a “weaker constitution”. It works, and they have Felix, but Colt ends up breaking the Peacock to do it, don’t remember how exactly (no one is actually aware of this until later). There’s also speculation in universe if the Peacock breaking while forming Felix is the reason he’s “like that”, but 1) the speculation comes FROM COLT, and 2) everyone else is of the opinion that, ya know, being ABUSED might have something to do with it.

So, Gabe uses the broken Peacock to impregnate Emilie, they have Adrien, and it’s all fine and dandy until Gabe starts to get sick. Like, REALLY sick, faster than Emilie does in canon. Emilie and Gabe are scrambling to figure out why, to find a cure (in this continuity, this is where Nathalie shows up, Emilie hires her to help them find a cure) but no luck. As Gabe gets worse and worse, he pleads with Emilie to try and save him, to do whatever she can. And Emilie at first is all for it! She uses the Butterfly to seek out anything and everything that could help them! But … there’s a middle bit here I think I’m forgetting, but  as time goes by with no sign of a cure, Emilie starts to notice a change in Gabe. Like, a bit of sanity slippage going on. Which eventually culminates in Gabe trying to steal Adrien’s amok, thinking he can use it to cure himself, at the cost of Adrien. Emilie is horrified, and manages to save Adrien’s amok, but in the altercation, Gabe swipes the Butterfly, and uses it with the Peacock to do … something, it isn’t clear at the time, because doing whatever this is causes Gabe’s life to give out, and Gabe dies. Just drops dead, and both Miraculous vanish.

Again, I’m missing some big chunks, but the long and the short of it is that, with the Miraculous gone and a better support system, Emilie goes to therapy to try and work out some of this. There’s a whole chapter dedicated to her working out her toxic upbringing, and how her parents insistence on “lineage” and “bloodline” led to using the Peacock in the first place, as opposed to adopting or something. Emilie has to learn exactly how toxic her upbringing was, and come to the realization that, as much as she loved him, she and Gabriel were feeding into each other’s issues, and they should both have seen a mental health professional at some point. She also has a lot of guilt about Gabe’s death, feeling like it’s all her fault, which she has to work through. For the main plot, it culminates in Emilie realizing she’s taken being protective over Adrien too far, and enrolling him at DuPont when “Origins” kicks off. Also, there’s a bit of drama in her beginning to date Nathalie, partially because she feels guilty for moving on, partly because she didn’t realize she was bisexual until her therapist spelled it out for her.

The plot is mostly the same, except now Hawk Moth wants the Ladybug and Black Cat to “restore what should be”, and Emilie feeling even MORE guilt because she was last person to have the Butterfly, she should have done more, etc, etc. Also, Emilie actually seeks out Fu to apologize and figure out if she can help. Then, around the Season 3 mark, we find out that Hawk Moth is Gabriel … ’s Sentimonster that he made in his image before his death. The Senti!Gabe’s goal, initially, was to steal the Ladybug and Black Cat so he could wish Gabriel back to life, but as time has gone on, his goal has changed, and now he wants to wish himself real. Also, because of the state Gabe was in when he made Senti!Gabe, Hawk Moth has a burning hatred of Adrien, seeing him as “stealing” Emilie from him.

Again, most of this is half remembered, I’m probably not doing it Justice.

Some other bits:

Adrien is about nine when Gabe dies

the reason we don’t have Hawk Moth earlier is that he was apparently “incubating”

Nathalie absolutely fell for Emilie first, and stuck around because she genuinely wanted to help her friend through a tough time

Nathalie and Emilie don’t start OFFICIALLY dating until sometime after Adrien starts school, but everyone agrees they were “more or less” dating already

Emilie’s coming out was her coming home after therapy, accepting a cup of tea from the Gorilla, and asking him “Did you know you can like both men AND women!?”

The Gorilla’s name is Henri, he’s actually Emilie and Amelie’s cousin and Adrien’s godfather

Because Nathalie came in earlier, Adrien has grown up with her. He calls her Auntie Nat, and was convinced from the ages of 5-8 that she was actually the Black Widow (Marvel)

The Agreste Fashion Company mostly belongs to Adrien at this point. Gabe left him most of the stock. It’s all being held in trust until he’s of age, and Adrien plans to either sell it or (much later) hand it over to Marinette

Amelie divorced Colt when she came home early to find him hitting Felix. She had to wrestle Felix’s amok off him - Felix claims it’s the most badass his mother has ever been. Colt is currently in prison at the start of the series, but I think it was hinted he’d become involved later?

Only Felix and Adrien are Sentimonsters.

Kagami’s dad is actually mentioned. He is currently serving time in prison for murder, which he committed in defence of his sister. Tomoe and Kagami visit him regularly, and he’s due out for parole sometime soon.

Chloé has a redemption arc, fairly well written, and becomes a permanent team member along with Alya and Nino. About halfway through, she goes to live with Adrien, (I think after Style Queen?) because her mom yelled at her on national television, and her dad’s response was “you shouldn’t have fucked up, then”. 

Felix and Amelie live in France with Emilie and Adrien, they moved after Colt got arrested. Felix goes to a different school than Adrien, something specific, because Felix was some kind of acting savant. I think it was mentioned he’d been in some stage plays?

Fu was married to his lady love, she used the Tiger to help him out

Marinette and Adrien are endgame

Chloé ends up dating Kagami

Sabrina and Felix end up dating. Chloé gives Felix a shovel speech that makes him terrified of her

Luka is mentioned to have a non-binary date-mate (I think an OC?) that we only meet briefly

After the Bourgeois Screaming Match, Jagged Stone and several other celebs refuse to stay at the Grand Paris

Alya’s mom is Akumatized into “Sue Chef” (it was both a pig pun, and related to legal terms), gets fired from the Grand Paris, and opens her own restaurant 

Lila turns out to be a Sentimonster created by Senti!Gabe, to drum up chaos and fuck with people. They have a father-daughter relationship, and were actually really sweet

The Order comes in as a secondary antagonist at some point after Hawk Moth is defeated, but I can’t exactly remember what their goal was

Hawk Moth’s defeat was basically proving that Hawk Moth didn’t need to use the wish to become real because he was already, and that all our Senti!Characters had been around long enough to become real. Senti!Gabe gets his own name (Can’t remember it) and identity, and officially adopts Lila as his daughter.

Lila has a crush on Alix

At some point, Senti!Gabe jokingly runs for mayor - he wins, because at this point everyone is sick of Andre. Senti!Gabe tries to argue privately that he’s technically only three or four years old, so he’s pretty sure he’s not old enough

That,s all I remember, If anyone finds this fic, send it my way!

-

Okay that’s all fucking GREAT and I hope someone finds this I’d love to read it!

[middlenamesage]

Sometimes I feel like an impostor Cancer because I’m just not drawn to caretaking/nurturing and don’t think I ever much have been. Sure, I’ve always liked animals, but the thing is, taking care of them just feels like WORK to me. I love my cats but there’s a good chance I won’t get more when they die because even with the new “automatic” litter box they still cause me more stress than most things in my daily life. Maybe it’s my intercepted 6th house- idk but it is true that I wasn’t properly shown how to be of service to others (or how to nurture others) in my youth.

Also though, mentioning the 6th house makes me think about how it might actually be the Virgo archetype that is the true biggest caretaker in the zodiac- as it relates to physical acts of service at least. Cancer relates more to emotional nurturance- which I also feel like I lack in being able to provide for others, but probably that’s because I still have a ways to go in learning how to nurture myself.

SOME CANCER TRAITS I DO RELATE TO: (even though I just wanna mention that I see the signs as less about personality traits and more about functions we’ve come here to learn or refine)

- How VERY self-protective I am (and Idk why this isn’t always one of the first things mentioned with ♋️ when you think of a crab and its shell). I’m very quick to put up walls. 🤷‍♀️ (it’s not 100% a bad thing though)

- My great memory especially for things about other people or sentiments they once shared with me. (I see this as especially a Cancer Mercury thing)

- My tendency to live in the past in general (way more than the future, but it’s the present I’m probably most engrossed in, at least emotionally). You can tell I only have my North Node in Aquarius cuz the future is a blind spot for me. 😔

- For all practical purposes, I am a major homebody. I might not be this way as much if my mental health was better, and also there’s a part of me that can find my home to be like a prison at times because there are always chores I have to do inside of it. Regardless, I don’t think I would do well without a homebase to return to at all times- both in an external and internal sense. I definitely don’t ever see myself being a wandering nomad in this lifetime. 😂

- I think I was ESPECIALLY sensitive to the dynamics of my family and mother, and I see it to be this way for most Cancers. The stereotype of Cancer being a momma’s boy/girl is definitely not always true, but the concept of a Cancer being especially sensitive to their family dynamics, particularly their relationship with the nurturing parent figure, I think is often true. This means that if you’re having a Cancer, you actually might have to be MORE careful with them than with another child to not give them reasons to resent you. 😉

- My emotions tend to inform my personal philosophies and decisions because I just can’t help but to place SO much importance on whatever emotion it is I’m currently feeling. I get so swept up in whatever emotion it is I’m feeling that once I’m no longer feeling it in the moment, I may actually forget what it was like to ever feel that emotion.

- I think I can be very persuasive (although most would probably not admit if I persuaded them to think a certain way) and this might be because without consciously trying, I know how to speak to peoples’ emotions.

- If you just take the somewhat flawed Cancer stereotypes out of the picture and focus on the ruler of Cancer, the Moon, well I relate to the Moon a TON. She is the master of quiet persuasion, influencing so much of what happens on earth, but she does her thing when there are less people out to notice her. I myself have been drawn to a nocturnal schedule most of my life.

The Moon is definitely more wild than she is domesticated in my opinion (although she does stick to a cycle, but astrologically speaking, the other planets always shifting means her journey each month is never quite the same). The Moon allows us to feel what is going on with the other planets, so in this way I can see why Cancer relates to support. But a Cancer’s support is not always obvious, sometimes it looks like being the reflection that gets another person to see something in themselves they didn’t want to see.

Also, people don’t seem to be thinking enough about what a crab is like when they think of Cancer. 🦀 So I figure that I’m actually just one of many Cancers who has a hard time relating to all the most well known Cancer stereotypes.

Hopefully this testimony has helped another Cancer out there to feel more understood. ♥️

[tadpolesonalgae]

okay, so this isn't a recommendation or like an attempt to sway what ur planning for the plot of cbmthy... more like, ik this will be very unlikely to happen but i like to ✨️imagine✨️ so treat it more like a silly au thought 🫢🫢

but anyways, i think it would be soooooooooo 🤌 delicious in terms of angst if, in cbmthy, az starts falling in love with reader and he realizes that. but before he can express his feelings or do anything about it, the mating bond snaps between them. bc you Know our insecure & high key depressed girlie is Not gonna ever believe he actually loves her. like i headcanon cbmthy azriel as someone who desperately strives for a romantic partner but he also doesn't think he's deserving of it for his own self esteem issues (and thus probably why he keeps going after "unavailable" females knowing that it will be unlikely to work out). and finally, FINALLY he gets the literal Sign From God™️ that he is meant to love and be loved by someone. and even though there was some.. not so great moments between them he'll still want to Try and make it work bc he's in love with her and they're literally mates.

but in reader's perspective it'll just look like he suddenly has an interest in her bc of the bond and she'll constantly question if he truly loves her (bc even tho i did perceive it as a heat of the moment slip up from him, the "if you were half the female [your sister] is" and "you think you're deserving of me?" comment would haunt me forever if someone said that to me, let alone someone i have a Crush on 😭). like az would do all these romantic gestures in attempting to convince her of his affections and it'll just upset her more. bc to her, the only logical reason he's acting like this is because of the bond, and she's convinced that if his mate was literally anyone else, he wouldn't bat an eye towards her. like.. combined with her insecurity about beauty (comparing herself to mor or elain) that we've alr seen, anything he does will just solidify her disbelief of his love.

can u imagine the devestation of hoping for a lover ur whole life and it turns out the person who was destined to be Exactly That will never believe ur love bc u (whether intended or not) fucked it up.... the mistrust. the miscommunication. the angstttttttt omg.

sorry im literally writing fanfic of ur fanfic at this point lmao 😭😭 anyways ty for listening to my rambling 😔

‘ik this will be very unlikely to happen but i like to ✨️imagine✨️ so treat it more like a silly au thought 🫢🫢’

Girl I’m going to be honest there have been quite a few points where the paths for cbmthy have severely diverged from my original plan and I’ve considered writing aus that explore them just to commemorate them (once cbmthy is entirely finished up, of course 🫣) so I’m delighted getting to hear your ideas on it!!

‘but before he can express his feelings or do anything about it, the mating bond snaps between them.’

Okayyy, so as the actual reader we would know Az’s feelings were true and were already present before the bond snapped into place, but because he hadn’t voiced them beforehand reader/‘you’ would doubt the sincerity of his feelings upon deciding to voice them? Poor reader 😭

‘like i headcanon cbmthy azriel as someone who desperately strives for a romantic partner but he also doesn't think he's deserving of it for his own self esteem issues’

I strongly agree with you there! I’m really hoping sjm treats his mentality well because I think it would also be a good chance not just to address mental health and self esteem issues on their own but also men’s mental health? Chaol’s arc in ToG (ToD) is probably one of my favourite because it felt so genuine to me, so I hope Az gets one like his, or Feyre’s, or Nesta’s 🧡💛

‘but in reader's perspective it'll just look like he suddenly has an interest in her bc of the bond and she'll constantly question if he truly loves her’

Nooo so she’d be living with this constant doubt and on top of all her own problems and she’d have be locked in a perpetual battle with her own mind on how genuine his emotions are? 😭😭

‘bc even tho i did perceive it as a heat of the moment slip up from him, the "if you were half the female [your sister] is" and "you think you're deserving of me?" comment would haunt me forever if someone said that to me, let alone someone i have a Crush on 😭’

He did kind of—intentionally or not—cut right to her bones with those comments huh? 🫢

‘can u imagine the devestation of hoping for a lover ur whole life and it turns out the person who was destined to be Exactly That will never believe ur love bc u (whether intended or not) fucked it up....’

Stop I hadn’t considered the angst from Azriel’s side!! I suppose I write from reader’s perspective so frequently and her and Az have been (in a way) quite cold to one another (maybe awkward is a better word?) that I hadn’t thought what would happen if a mating bond happened and what that would mean for Az 😭

‘sorry im literally writing fanfic of ur fanfic at this point lmao 😭😭 anyways ty for listening to my rambling 😔’

No it’s so fun to hear!! Really it’s such a heartwarming experience that you enjoy cbmthy enough to be so involved with it, it means so much to me so thank you ☹️🫂

Okay, so my thoughts on this—if I’m honest, I think I’m familiar for the most part with how cbmthy is going to conclude? There are still many things I need to fine-tune since there’s a large chunk of story still to tell, but for the most part the different paths I’ve taken up to this point I’ve chosen due to my own writing capabilities (or what I think they are)? Like you said, I think this would be great for a one shot, and it was a path I’d actually considered to some extent, but personally I don’t think I’d be able to successfully write reader recovering if a mating bond snapped before Azriel got a chance to tell her about his feelings which is why that won’t be happening in the main story :)

That being said, I would like to explore those sides of things on a smaller, more controlled level? For example instead of it being a mating bond, now that reader’s magic has come out so obviously I think that’s something reader will struggle with, plus one other subplot that’ll finally come to light at the end of Ch. 15 which reader might speculate is affecting how Az acts around her in future parts!

Either way I’m looking forward to when the next part is finally complete since it’s taking me ages 😭🧡💛 I’m also excited to see how you’ll react to it and what you’ll make of different character’s choices!

[actual-changeling]

I’ve checked @ /badaziraphaletakes and, even though I was already aware of their harassing behavior and had blocked them and much of the defense squad, I was shocked to see how many GO blogs like and comment on their posts. I would not have expected so many people to support harassment and bullying. Good Omens means a lot to me, but I have to distance myself from the fandom for the sake of my mental health. I've already been meaning to do this since I saw that Emma /nightingalecottage was bullied out of the fandom and she was one of the kindest people I've interacted with here. I hope they won’t do the same to you. I reported that blog to tumblr, maybe this could help. 😔

My account itself won't go anywhere, the tumblr execs are gonna have to drag me out of here kicking and screaming. It has lived through many fandoms and will live through many more.

For a show that is about celebrating the weird and people fundamentally being people there sure are many who still behave like they're in high school. Siding with the bullies won't get you anything except a big sign on your forehead that says "asshole person".

[gnawer-of-table-legs]

THE SEEKER (SOUL VOID) HEADCANONS, THEORIES, AND ANALYSIS

SPOILERS!!!! OI!!!

tw: brief self harm mention, car crashes, death, blood mention, mental health struggles (is that too vague?). Let me know if anything needs to be added.

Demi and pan

The guy ever ❤️

has a fear of failure. It’s pretty intense, but I’m not sure if it’s to the level of Atychiphobia since Atychiphobia will usually result in the individual avoiding situations in which they could fail, and he definitely doesn’t. But. It sure does come close.

if he ever played DND he’d play a neutral good wizard. It’s the research aspect for him.

probably died in the 1960s. Fedoras had begun to fall out of fashion in the 70s, so it would give him a good time period to be wearing those (the fashion died when he did 😔)

ALSO: Car safety regulations began to be a concern in the 1970s. There, manufacturers started offering airbags and anti-lock brakes, better seatbelts, etc.

quote from a source I ain’t citing: “President Johnson signed the National Traffic and Motor Vehicle Safety Act of 1966 into law on September 9, 1966”

I’d like to imagine he died right before those car safety regulations. For the Irony.

He canonically uses phrases like “post-haste” so I’m putting him in the humanities field. Maybe history major with a minor in philosophy. (Did they have majors and minors back then? Probably not in the same way we do now)

Because he died trying to get someone out of a car crash, I assume that he had been one of the people in the car when it crashed— otherwise, how would he have lost his life by just approaching the car and trying to pull people out? Sure, Fire/car exploding is possible. But since he’s shown to have glass shards stuck in the same places where his scars are, I assume that he died from the broken glass of the car -> over exerted himself trying to save others and bled out.

The Seeker is completely unaware of how many void residents stan him (we all saw the Husk’s mural of him)

(is it a mural if its on the floor?)

Probably has imposter syndrome.

bitchass motherfucker would cry at sad movie scenes (unless someone else is also crying)

some theories:

It’s been confirmed that a soul’s journey through the SV depends on the soul itself. There was a guy in the Respite Biome that described a starkly different experience than the player’s, and then came to conclusion that the journey was different for everyone. However, I still think souls can cross paths if they share something in common with other souls. So if each biome represents an aspect of the individual’s trauma, then the biomes in which the Seeker has been should give insights on his character, right? Because he talked to the Respite Entity and inspired them to make a change before leaving— and yet the Leech does not seem to have met him (with how lucid she is about her situation, she would definitely have been able to collaborate with the Seeker in some way, and yet he isn’t mentioned). Even though the Leech Biome (guilt, I think— guilt and being toxic/parasitic in relationships) is very close to the Respite in the player’s journey, the Seeker does not come across it because it is not a trauma he shares. His books do not appear there.

He and his books appear in the grasping forest (wanting something always out of reach, implied to be happiness, loss of self*), his books are in the enamel core and the veiny area (idk what these represent), the Sketchyard (feeling of not being good enough despite efforts to improve/bring joy to others), and the respite. *he is shown to be afraid of losing his sense of self, both in his journal entries and when he’s dying on the ground.

The glass shards area (before the Leeches and after the Respite) probably has to do with his death. Idk why the player can access it, unless they also have trauma relating to car crashes/etc— or maybe it’s more generic. Maybe that biome stands for broken glass or sharp things in general (sharp things and allusions to self harm appear throughout the player’s journey, along with a glass bottle that is so pivotal to their character that it is used as one of the three keys to access the Grim).

I think a big theme for his character is how talking with people who share your trauma/experiences or can relate to them can be helpful to both know you aren’t alone, and to share stories/coping methods. The Seeker is able to traverse many biomes (although not all) because he shares their trauma somewhat. This is further cemented by his ability to sense others emotions by touching them.

Not all souls who share experiences form healthy relationships, of course. Some can become unhealthy/manipulative/dependent (ahem ahem, Grim and Leech). The individual needs to take steps to maintain healthy relationships (as is with any relationship, regardless of who is involved).

@captain-will

Now that you’ve finished the game I have released the hcs

[notsofine]

Hi, I'm wondering how you juggle your mental health issues with being a parent. Were you unwell when you had children? Are you worried your mental health problems might have an impact on your kids? As someone with long-term mental health issues but without children, I often wonder about my peers who do have kids. I hope your new psychiatrist can be of some help

My mental health issues have been long standing but I was in a pretty good place before having kids. I worked 5 days a week, was at the gym or pool daily, had a good, solid routine in place that worked. It kept me on track, it kept me safe.

Something about pregnancy threw everything out of whack. I struggled through horrific post partum anxiety with my first but I made it out the other side after a year and my child thrived. With my second things were difficult from the get go (unprepared, difficult pregnancy and traumatic birth) and that is when I really started to struggle.

We had supports put into place pretty early for our well-being and my children are a huge protective factor. I would never ask for help for myself but knowing that if I am not okay it affects my girls makes me much more likely to reach out when I realise things aren’t travelling too well.

I had no clue how big a trigger having kids would be for me so I do a lot work with my psychologist and make a big effort to validate, co regulate and show up the way I want to; essentially try as hard as possible to make sure their childhood was nothing like mine. My therapist reminds me that having lived it means I am more likely be able to empathise and validate how they are feeling and work with them instead of against them and when it comes to my girls if I feel like I’m drowning and I don’t know what I’m doing, I stop and ask. I mess up, I own it, I apologise, no buts.

Do I worry? Of course I do 😔 I worry my “faulty genes” have been passed down, when I see them pick a fight or throw something I worry it’s from modelling me, when I see them unable to regulate I worry that I haven’t done my job at teaching them these skills, I worry that they will one day start wondering why mummy is different, I keep a look out for signs of neurodivergence, anxiety; so many fears. So many worries. Can I keep them safe, how do I explain that the world can be so cruel. It never stops.

Sorry I got a bit side tracked 😅

[havenmoodz]

A group of campers that are all yanderes?! Sign me up!

Joking aside, I have one question for the summer campers:

How would each of them feel about the reader being a shut-in (prefers to stay in the dark playing video game or going on their phone etc).

Cause Why Not?

a/n: I LOVE YOU ANONNN/p

First up, Maven! He’d understand, but would drag you out for some activities once in a while. Like sports, crafts, talking about life, literally anything; he doesn’t want you to live that kind of lifestyle, even though he has nothing against it. If he thinks there’s something causing you to act like this (i.e. mental health issues, tiredness, etc) then he’ll find ways to help you out. That is what he’s good at, after all. If it’s just because you prefer it, he’ll respect your opinions and not push it too much. Although, he will lecture you on how unhealthy it is to be shut in a dark room all day. “I know you have to like at least some of these activities, don’t you?” 

Next is Dawn! Honestly, she’d probably do the same thing as Maven but just…more confrontational 💀 Would slide in your room, “Heya! You seriously aren’t planning to stay inside all day, right? C’mon, let’s go swimming!” and wouldn’t even give you a chance to say no. She doesn’t think of it as that deep, though, but if she realizes it is, she’ll just leave you to Maven and Evan. Will get the little ones to horde around you so you can’t get out of it. “gasp Is that a hermit crab shell?! Let’s go see! C’mon guys, it’s soooo cool, isn’t it?? I think I have a story about Mr. Hermit the crab! Anyone wanna hear?”

Evan would probably be the one most likely to give up after 10 minutes of trying to convince you 💀 The process of “Yo, let’s go chill near the lake…c’monnn…why not?” to “I didn’t have enough sleep for this. You do you 😒” Definitely would charm his way through though. “Hm? What was that? No? Well…I’ll be the judge of that ;)” (I’m sorry, I’ll pay for therapy). If he gets called along with Maven, though, these two will start bickering like a married couple of 9 years and never stop. “Hey- are you feeling alright? Maybe we could start off simple, like going for a walk! It must get lonely stuck inside this dark ro-“ 

“AWHHHH that’s no fun, is it now, mAvEn? C’mon darling, let’s go with ME. I have so many things planned :)” 

“Hey- you interrupted me! And stop trying to flirt with them, they’re mine. I get to take care of them, isn’t that right, darling?”

“Huh. Well, the last time I checked, I, EVAN, was the one who found them at the lake. So obviously, I should have them, right darling? Right.”

“You little…ugh…see, this is why you didn’t get counsellor of the month, you fucking suck.” 

“wha- EXCUSE YOU?? I SUCK? WELL YOU KNOW WHAT YOU CAN SUCK? YOU CAN FUCKING SUCK MY DI-“ (Okay, I think you get the point 💀) 

For Rina? Tbh, they would go ahead and chill with you. You can play video games together, talking about life together, make fun of celebrities toge- 

Hell, you can literally just sit there in silence, she doesn’t care! You can be shut-in buddies. Eventually though, Maven would have to drag the both of you out. Scolding Rina and leaving you alone. She’d sneak back in, though, and you two would go back to whatever you were doing. One of the other counsellors would end up having to sleep next to you to make sure Rina doesn’t sneak back in. Rina can no longer be nominated for counsellor of the month until she stops 😔

August would be hogged up in his own room, that they share with Dawn. Eventually, when he knows Rina isn’t there, he’d creep into your room with a pout, complaining about his boredom. “Mmmm, but whyyy? I wanna stay with you, your bed is definitely softer than mine :(“. Also one of the candidates that would have to get dragged out by Maven, but they won’t get as bad as a scolding as Rina ‘cause they’re sensitive 😭Would apologize gingerly, and then will immediately snuggle back against you, stating himself, that “I should be your new bunkie now”. 

[lisztomaniac-mp3]

okay so think about it this guy is struggling with self-inficted memory loss, his [lover] gets sucked into a portal and his [lover]'s twin brother is trying to rebuild the portal and get him back. Brother doesn't know jack shit about how to build a portal and reaches out to guy like "tell me how to do this" and then realizes that guy has memory issues and guy keeps forgetting that brother isn't [lover] and like personally it's not endgame for me but I think that the idea they found comfort in each other, especially with the idea that stan had a thing with another mad scientist (don't beat me up i could explain the correlation) and then I could talk a lot about fidds and just their whole relationship. My point is I was sceptical at first and I don't think it's endgame but like its so lesbian men y'know???

i wrote more 😔 (it got out of hand) ↓

First of all just like little silly headcanons stan is NOT cis he's def gender fluid but he just likes to present more masculinely. Fidds is a guy but I think he would love dresses. And rick is gnc transmasc no one will change my mind idc if it's cringe or smth. I had to get that off my chest 😭

Second of all I wanna talk about stan and rick and I know that it's like a silly semi-canon thing that isn't supposed to matter but it matters to me because yeah rick and morty is a comedy but rick is not a particularly comedic character, he is a character that understands comedy and is a funny person, but the idea of his character is tragic and depressing- he's kind of in a perpetual manic state doing whatever he can to be happy, and he somehow ends up in the gravity falls universe, and he falls in some weird way head over heels for the IDEA of stan. I do not by any standard think their relationship was healthy nor do I think it was built on real love for each other, but rather the idea of eachother. eventually they realize that they just weren't meant for each other, rick wasn't ready for a relationship and stan didn't care enough to uphold their possible relationship, and rick ended up just leaving. I think this happened a couple years before stan visited ford btw

I can't remember too much of what happened directly after the portal incident with stan, so please let me know if there are important details I missed lol but basically I think that after a few weeks of stan realizes that he can't teach himself advanced physics fast enough to fix the portal and decides to reach out to a guy who presumably worked with ford, a guy who's signed a lot of papers in the lab and was at the top of fords address book. I think that after the first portal incident, fidds went to live with his ex and his son. I think that despite his ex's remorse for his absent behavior in his son's life, she still understood (with the extent of her knowledge) that fidds was not mentally in a good place, and offered him some help. When fidds opened the door to Stan, he saw Ford's face and blah blah stuff whagever. He knew that stan wasn't ford, and I think that he liked stan because of specific similarities and differences that reminded him of ford in a comforting way but never really brought up a lot of fords specific negative attributes (although he came with his own). Their relationship was wishy-washy, and they never seemed to seek out each other but instead ended up entangled in each other's lives. fidds told stan he would tell him everything he needed to know, teach him the physics and science, but he stopped there. fidds refused to touch the portal, and refused to go down into the lab. After a long while, fidds' mental health went down again, spending too much time in a place that slowly triggered him into another episode, and he erased a lot of his memory. After this, stan realized that if he really cares about fidds, he would leave him alone, and their relationship fizzled out. I think that it wasn't just love- I think it was a trauma bond, and the comfort they found in eachother was solely because of their love for another person. from my experience, when you are closely trauma bonded with someone, you will likely end up in a romantic/sexual relationship with that person, and it is likely a temporary situation- a hello kitty band-aid trying to keep your guts from spilling out. it's comforting, and maybe if it's strong enough it could help for a minute, but you will have to realize that you need stitches eventually

Also I gotta talk about how Rick and fidds are correlated because I think that it's another case of stan finding comfort in seeing ricks positive traits in fidds and none of ricks negative traits (even if fidds comes with his own issues). Rick was constantly spouting science stuff that sounded like nonsense to stan, and often treated stan as a dog (remember that comparison he made with summer being a cat and morty a dog? Its like that.) while fidds treated stan as simply someone who was learning. Also, I think that when stan realized that Rick could've easily brought back ford, he probably had a breakdown because he didn't have any contact to rick. he often subconsciously compares rick and fidds. I don't have a lot more to say abt this lol

Anyways yeah that's my shitty thesis on why fidds and stan definitely snoozled at least once...

(I know I didnt mention bill I'm sorry it just never came up 😭😭 I'll add to this l8r)

EDIT : THIS IS A MEME DO NOT TAKE IT SERIOUSLY (and seriously just don’t be Rude????? Like wtf lol)

[infinityonimmortals]

Wish i had video of Shaun Morgan referring to lip syncing as "faggy shit"

It's kinda funny bc Skillet was like, "the government is trying to divide us and make us not like each other and I love Jesus and we should all be one people right now who like rock music yeah 🤘🏾✝️✝️🤘🏾🎸🎸🎙️🥁🎼🖤🖤🖤 And I wasn't fully enjoying the concert (bc i was freezing my ass off) but i enjoyed the sentiment, and something about christian rock makes childhood me feel like I'm okay y'know, even though I don't listen to it or believe it anymore.

Obviously a talented band but the "smoke-throwers" instead of flame throwers attached to each wrist and only touching like,,,? 2 peeps in the crowd was the most christian-rock-thing ive ever witnessed

I didn't record during their set (bc I was weirdly self-conscious) but they had some cool videos on staggered panels in the background, as well as lifting platforms that the members had to stand perfectly still on as they alternated up and down. They even had the cello player up there. (Side Note: STOP LETTING CELLISTS WALK AROUND. GIVE THOSE FUCKERS A STRAP AND CHAIR. i don't wanna see it 😔). Pretty standard set all around.

The lead singer (can't remember his name) sounds like he's going to lose his voice a little, I wouldn't be surprised if he needs a break in a few weeks. Talked a lot about how he likes Texas and especially the "don't mess with Texas" phrase/signs. He also did the classic throw-your-instrument-around-your-body-and-pray-to-the-strap-lock-gods-that-it-doesn't-go-flying . It reminded me of Pete Wentz and made me happy.

The real star of that band is the drummer/vocalist!!!!! SHE. IS. THE. MOMENT. honestly her voice was really clear and steady and if she sang every song, I certainly wouldn't be mad. Her drumming is powerful as hell and she honestly carried the whole show, if she interacted w/the audience from the kit mic it would have been lit (at least for me).

Now the opener, Royal Lynn-

The set wasn't bad... It was good. No it wasn't it was okay..mm nah good. Nope. Just okay. I guess.

Nothing about the set was really, wowing y'know. She's a great singer and can belt, almost no noticable vocal fuck ups, and was high energy all the way thru. I have no experience with her music and will definitely check it out to get a better feel for it, butt uh, not amazed y'know.

She also referred to her genre as "disco metal"? And.,, nothing about it was disco. Or metal really?? Idk man I feel cheated.

Also, before AND after. before and after every song. "We're gonna talk about mental health. Can we talk about mental health. This is about mental health if y'all don't mind. We👏🏾are👏🏾going👏🏾to👏🏾talk👏🏾 about 👏🏾Mental Health 👏🏾bc👏🏾 i👏🏾dont 👏🏾think 👏🏾its👏🏾talked 👏🏾about👏🏾enough 👏🏾in small👏🏾 towns👏🏾and we should 👏🏾do 👏🏾that 👏🏾more👏🏾 often👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾🧨🧨🧨🧨!!!" <- which promptly caught some ire bc,,,, uh believe it or not,,, she just messed with Texas lol. Idk 🤷🏾‍♀️nbd BUT it was a lil insulting y'know. It's a "big university" town that I live 2hrs away from but even I was like,,,,,, we ain't small BRUV. She also kept referring to herself as country/a hick and I think people forget that pandering to an audience also TELLS THE AUDIENCE WHAT YOU THINK OF THEM.

The shoe-horned/half-assed/virtue-signalling didn't sit well and just dulled the set man. Plus the over hype. Just let the set play and if we rock we rock I guess. BIG BUT, LIKE I SAID GOOD VOCALS GOOD ENERGY I WILL KEEP LISTENING (¿I guess?)

Fave Royal Lynn quote: "I made a country song so heavy, it went to rock radio."

Now girly 💅🏾, wtf is that supposed to mean

ANYWAYS,

SEETHER

Again, Shaun wants y'all (the people) to know that they (SEETHER) under no circumstances (ever ever) lip sync (aka. that faggy shit) lol

I say idk bc I really don't know man lol. Like I don't expect middle age men in rock bands to be patron saints of fagitude and faggotry or something but like he struggled to find an adjective in the first place and that's all he could muster. IT WAS NEAR THE END OF THE SET AS WELL, JUST STRAIGHT MURDERED THE VIBE.

I get it we're Texas™️ but I feel like rock shows are such a strange place bc you have a strong mix of gay alternative peeps and heavy metal head right-wingers who show up @ rock shows bc there's no real music scene, but we all have to share the space. It felt uncomfortable, at least for me (especially bc of the people cheering a little too hard in response). BUT BESIDES THAT,

HE KILLED THAT SHIT

The entire set was amazing quality wise. The most energy came from the bass player (I think, I wasn't close enough, nor did I care enough, to be studying the instruments) interesting and engaging set all the way thru, there wasn't a lull or much empty air. Absolutely NO FUCK UPS. They must rehearse like crazy. Shaun's vocals were gorgeous 💯💯💯 cd quality audio live on stage man. Some of the most stable live singing that I've ever heard honestly. If you get the chance, go see Seether live they won't disappoint (music wise).

Nothing much to say bc, the set was killer 🤷🏾‍♀️

[teatalkblog]

https://www.tumblr.com/teatalkblog/764055576443600896/october-10-th-is-international-mental-health-day?source=share I lost a friend of mine years ago because she ended up committing s**cid** over a relationship and we never knew what was wrong with her, she was always smiling She was light and pure joy always and didn't even have any signs that she was having a bad time. And in 2019 was when we found out what was wrong with her on a note that she left  and she never told anyone before did what she did  .We found out about it in a letter she left to her father, mother and me. She said she didn't want to tell us anything because she didn't want to worry us but it was all because of a relationship that led her to commit this act and she thought there was no other solution , we didn't notice was wrong with her  all that time not even the day before she did it. And I always wonder why? And I doubt even what kind of best friend I was that I couldn't tell that she was suffering in silence , even blaming myself for not being there for her and telling her that everything is going to be ok. Girls, please, we are seeing more and more of these men's behaviour and they are worse than ever, please don't ever let them take away all the will to live that you have. I have seen several comments on the case being discussed and I see so many men defending the aggressor knowing what his behaviour was like afterwards towards women and it is disgusting just to think what they are capable of . 😔

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a similar experience a few years ago. He wasn't really my friend but a friend of a friend who I spent some time with. He was the calmest person ever and never gave a sign, and he ended up taking his own life just before he graduated. It was shocking, but it was the moment I realised that depression is not always announced. What I want to say is that while it's normal to feel guilty or doubt how good a friend you were, if there was something you should have considered or been aware of, there are so many factors that lead to su*cide. You were probably the best friend she could have ever dreamed of having.

What I'm trying to say here is that no matter how difficult or unattainable you think it is, there is always a solution. Sometimes we feel more comfortable talking to a stranger than to someone we know, because we are afraid of being judged. Whoever you want to talk to, PLEASE TALK. Talking is so important. Two people have contacted me recently on here and although I know there's nothing I can do physically to help them, they really just needed to talk to someone, even a stranger like me online. I'm here, my DMs are always open. Just talk to someone. And always check on your loved ones, even if they look happy. It's important ❤️

[coochiecowgirl]

I’m not auditioning 😔

I was really excited about this but working OT right now is taking it out of me. I have not had the energy to do any practicing. But I am gonna sign up for the next chorus girls academy. They do them a few times per year. Maybe next year I’ll audition. There’s always next year. I’m just so tired and exhausted.

I also might talk to my Dr about switching from lexapro to prozac. My coworker said lexapro made her super exhausted and prozac has really helped her. and my Dr suggested I switch to prozac since it might help with my energy levels.

This past week has been bad. I haven’t brushed my teeth or washed my face since last Sunday I think. It’s been two weeks since I’ve showered. Doing normal daily things is so hard.

Two more weeks of working 50 hours and then I’ll be back to my regular schedule. The extra money is good but my mental health is not.