#Irrelevant Video Game Player

[kawaiiiuniverssse]

Ninjago Dragons Rising Season 2 Part 2 Spoilers

Uncle/Niece bonding time!

(Kai and Cole watching over each other’s daughters was one of my favorite little details)

[camellia-thea]

okay. 400 more words tonight and i'm done for the day. i've talked about player character and immersion, then the martian job and player character creation. i've also got the beginning of something about the cons of choice on immersion -- when a player can't push a barrier while playing. such as da2 not allowing me to beat the shit out of aveline and stop her from being the captain of the guard. i've managed to sneak a lion king reference in (lol)

[themindelectricdemo4]

After watching the second episode of tadc I was like man it'd be so fun to explore that concept with a new oc !then I realized I literally already have one. His name is fucking Nanda Otsuka.

[annabelle--cane]

"the magnus protocol had a whole ARG beforehand? what?"

yes! it did!

"oh so I need to have participated in this whole big thing to actually understand the podcast?"

not at all! from the official post-mortem put out by RQ, "while the ARG was not something that was necessary to participate in to understand the magnus protocol, it was designed to contain a wealth of background story and context that would enrich any player's listening experience."

"a wealth of background context that would enrich my listening experience 👀👀👀 how can I learn about this?"

SO glad you asked. sadly, many of the materials made for the arg have been taken down since the game ended 😔 (ex., the official OIAR, magnus institute, and bonzoland websites. (edit ii: I found partial wayback machine captures! see below) though @strangehauntsuk is still up!), so we're a bit low on primary sources, but in terms of learning about what happened:

for a starting point, I would really recommend this video by @pinkelotjeart

it's super accessible, it was made in real time as the game progressed and follows the solving and revelation of clues as they happened, it hits all the major points of the mystery and moments of community insanity while eliding some of the nitty gritty puzzle grinding, 10/10 would recommend.

here's the official summary put out by RQ, and I'd recommend reading through this once you've already gotten a basic handle on the flow of the story and the basic connections between major clues and events. it's got some fun behind-the-scenes info and lays out the thought process behind the puzzles in simple terms

here's the full masterdoc of all puzzles and resolutions put together in the statement remains discord server. masterdoc my absolute BELOVED, masterdoc my bethrothed, masterdoc my soul mate. I'd recommend this as a second port of call after the above video as it either contains all details about the puzzles or links to other expanded docs that do.

here's the narrative summary doc that lays out all the plot and lore discovered in three pages of plain prose. if you just want to get to the good bits as fast as you can and get blasted directly in the face by contextless lore bombs, this is the doc for you. if you don't want to start with the video, I'd say this is another good entry point.

once you've got the lay of the land, some of the game materials that I found particularly interesting include:

the in-universe east germany expat usenet forum, with all content translated into english. most of it is irrelevant space filler with occasional extremely sus lore, but I still found it fun to read through. love to soak in some fictional forum drama.

chdb.xlsx, the spreadsheet of the names of all the children the protocol 'verse magnus institute was studying/experimenting on. EDIT: here is a version of the sheet without any annotations and with all of the names in their original order, kudos to @theboombutton for catching that the commonly shared copy had the order swapped around.

klaus.xls, a (very corrupted) spreadsheet with what looks like the classifications of a bunch of old OIAR cases.

EDIT: have a few more saved materials from the game that I forgot to include.

an in-universe audio ad to apply to the OIAR that ran before archives episodes and kicked off the whole game.

an in-universe video ad to apply to the OIAR, this one is an official upload that's still up from the game itself. you can subscribe to the OIAR's official youtube channel today, if you so chose.

the robo-voicemail greeting from the OIAR's phone line.

EDIT II:

here is a wayback machine capture of the OIAR's official website.

here is a wayback machine capture of the bonzoland website.

(pretty sure both of the above captures just archived the home pages, though I haven't tried clicking all of the links. I'd say they're still worth looking at, the home pages give a good window into the vibes.)

once you start poking around in these documents, you'll find a bunch of links to others with further information, the materials I've included here just contain what I feel to be the most relevant details to getting a broad feel for the whole game. once again, huge shout out to the statement remains server, I was barely in there as the ARG was in progress and only ducked my head in every so often to find links like these. true mvps of the fandom.

[justsomeguypoll]

JUST SOME GUY: FINAL ROUND

Connecticut Clark (Flork of Cows) and Stanley (The Stanley Parable)

For the final round, our contestants deserve a little more detail than just the reasons they were submitted with.

Created with the sole purpose of being the least interesting OC possible, Connecticut Clark has been crushing his competition consistently in every round. He has nothing going for him -- no cool powers, no tragic backstory, no interesting appearance. The only notable thing about him is his cool, badass, goth wife, Malfina the Demon Witch, which in fact is one of the most Just Some Guy traits: being a bland character with a love interest who's way more competent than him. Get it, Clark.

As for his competition, Stanley has the honor of being the most submitted character when character nominations opened up. Just like Clark, Stanley has been consistently sweeping, and it's for good reason. Despite being the titular character in his own game, Stanley has absolutely nothing that makes him stand out. His appearance is that of a default video game character, he never speaks a word, and he has no personality or backstory other than what the Narrator occasionally projects onto him, and even then, those details are normally irrelevant by the next time the game begins. He is truly just a shell for the player and Narrator to puppet around, which is the whole point of the game.

While they are both truly Just Some Guy, for the final time, I ask...

[knuckleblaster]

On some level I understand the rejection or outright denial of V2's death: it was jarring and brutal, especially for a character who, at least in laws of traditional video game rivals and the rule of thirds, seemed like it'd stick around for longer. This said, inferring from in-game lore as well as dev statements, I believe V2's death, tragic that it is, is not unwarranted; and that it is commonly pigeonholed into a characterization it does not fit into due to its assumed role within the game.

This is long, so it's going under the cut.

Considering its name, it's easy to assume V2 is a new and improved version of its predecessor; but it is more heavily implied that it's simply a version of V1 with thicker plating, and nothing more. [1] V2 was an attempt at salvaging V1's design after war became irrelevant, to capitalize on the resources wasted on a highly advanced war machine by rebranding it as an adaptable worker, for security and (theoretically) other peacetime activities (...not an innuendo). This was a failure; there's no reason to invest in something so refined when a handful of lesser machines could do the same job [2].

If V2 is contextualized within its backstory, it makes a lot more sense why it ate shit so quickly. It is, out of any in-game machine so far, one of the least suited for survival in Hell. Sentries and Streetcleaners were created for war. Swordsmachine(s) and Mindflayers are scrapheads, constantly adapting to create (and protect) their perfect, lethal body. [3] If anything, it's on the same level as a Drone, able to defend itself in a limited capacity, but not intentionally programmed or built for combat. Faced with V1, something built for perfect, swift destruction, a machine made for peace would stand even less of a chance than normal, even with an equal level of mobility and build.

V2 is also doomed, in a very literal sense, by the narrative. In a meta sense, it does not matter to the game story whatsoever [4]. V1 is the butterfly whose wing flaps set Gabriel's story in motion, but V2 has no such connection to his story, and is thus irrelevant. Even its lore entry is overshadowed by information about V1/its connection to V1. A third fight, as well, was never in the running, not necessarily due to anything in the game lore, but because its first and second encounters are all it needs: a third rematch would be repetitive and messy [5]. The reason for its extremely violent death sequence is to ensure there was no question as to its fate [6].

In regards to its personality; it is oft-headcanoned as loud, irritable, and competitive, but this characterization is more likely due to its color as well as its assumed role as a "rival" to V1; rather than based upon its in-game actions. Although its initial intentions are up to interpretation [7], comparing its actions and mechanics to other enemies fully rationalizes its anger. Although it's fairly easy to enrage in-fight, the criteria for its enrage state is much more specific than other enemies, and it's quite easy to not trigger it at all. Cerberi will enrage after one of its kind dies, Malicious Faces and Mindflayers after a certain amount of damage has been dealt (on Violent). Most notably, as the only other character with a rematch, Gabriel begins his second fight enraged after his first defeat [3], which can imply by extension that even though V2 is taking its second fight more seriously [8], it is still not outwardly angry. Its enrage state is only triggered when its patience is depleted (the player avoids it for too long), or in its second fight when it has been punched with the Knuckleblaster. These can be interpreted as indicators that V2 likes it when the fight is "fair": when it's not being avoided and picked at from a distance, or being hit with its own arm; which is frankly pretty fucking mean. A side note: Returning to its creation, it can also potentially be inferred that V2 was intentionally programmed with a rational, controlled, and even marketable personality, easily suppressed or overwritten for ease of use.

In another game, or if V1 was the protagonist, perhaps V2 would not be dead. Instead, V2 is doomed by its creators, both in-game and in reality. It mirrors V1 in action and Gabriel in mind, but unlike them, it has no place in this story beyond a truly fantastic duo of fights. Although its story has any number of potential rewritings or epilogues [9], its doom was always intended. It's easy to mourn lost potential, and its end is intensely tragic; but I believe it is a tragedy that meshes nicely with the rest of the game's story. V2 is dead, and not a second too soon.

Footnotes:

1.

Along with the lore entry for V2:

V1’s planned production was cancelled and an updated model, V2, was developed instead, using the standardized plating, since durability was far more important during times of peace when no bloodshed was necessary.

2.

twitter.com/HakitaDev/status/1538313328715513857

3. in-game lore entries, can be read on ultrakill.miraheze.org or here in one document: steamcommunity.com/sharedfiles/filedetails/?id=2245904838

4.

5.

twitter.com/HakitaDev/status/1538336055681863680

6. "And then V2 dies as hard as anyone could possibly die to make sure people understand he's fucking dead and is not coming back" - dev commentary, 05:08:09 (youtu.be/kaImho5JioI?si=v4_m90nfLOY-DyEZ&t=18489)

7.

8.

9. Notably, Dream's End Come True / v2isdead.com.

[ava-dreel-thinks]

Okay so like obviously I would choose Violet as Clem’s love interest (see above) but I just don’t think Louis can handle the raiders??? But I don’t want to be girlfriends with Violet and then not save her??? But also her ex is over there and that’s just a typical lesbian experience like I think she’d be fine. Louis is like, a softie. He can’t handle all that. And I think he can be annoying sometimes but I don’t want him kidnapped! But I don’t want to betray my girl!!

Oh dude I was pro Louis for Clem, like someone to balance out her serious side and Violet was good for Clem in the sense that they were both practical but hooooly shit. Louis is episode 1 and 2 is pissing me off. He’s so naive and unserious, even in the face of walkers and traps. I understand him being upset about Marlon. Can’t fault him for that, but not taking food seriously? Not being able to face serious issues? Not for my Clementine.

[lesbianralzarek]

boggles my mind how overused the term "playersexual" is. its useful for critiquing games where the devs had no interest in bi/pan representation, and refuse to work the characters attraction into it. "playersexuality" is the result of a writer's cowardice when faced with the task of incorporating any semblance of a queer experience into the actual game. it is NOT when a romanceable character is bi/pan for player convenience. of fucking course they are. theyre also willing to adventure with the player for your convenience. you can heal getting shot by going to bed for your convenience. welcome to video games. its also not when characters have preferences and talk more about one gender than another. thats actually, like, accurate to how most bi/pan people experience attraction. its fine. shut up.

ALL THAT BEING SAID, if you refer to any of the bg3 companions as being playersexual or "actually gay/a lesbian/straight" im killing you. no the fuck they arent. there is no run where wyll is straight and karlach is a lesbian. the player's gender is irrelevant. they are all bi/pan whether you like it or not. die about it.

[copperbadge]

My ADHD video game, Endeavor OTC, used to offer only one player character body type, which is understood to be a form of alien or possibly robot, the graphics are small and it's difficult to tell. I liked having an "Akilian" body because you also got numerous skins to dress them in, everything from "dinosaur costume" to "butterfly-themed superhero". My favorite was the dapper victorian cat followed by the 70s-themed skin with the disco ball head. It was mainly irrelevant anyway since you don't really see the avatar during gameplay.

They've just introduced new body types, and points for saying "Feminine" and "Masculine" rather than "Female" and "Male", not to mention setting it up so you can change avatar easily and frequently. That said, offering me the option to keep my Akilian body or go to a gendered body just makes it seem like they have some real weird ideas about nonbinary people.

Wake up babe, new gender identity dropped.

I suspect they're doing this because they just got bought by a bigger company that wanted "normal" gendered avatars, which is a huge bummer, but we'll see. The Akilian body type still gets the vast majority of the cool outfits, at least. I'm sticking with Akilian unless they really up their game for the gendered avatars' clothing.

[ID: A screengrab of the avatar-selection menu from Endeavor OTC; it shows three body type options, "Akilian", "Feminine", and "Masculine". While the Akilian body does look more cartoonish, the main difference is the hair, although the Akilian and feminine body types are also thinner than the boxy masculine body.]

[silentscrying]

🏀 buzzer beater | chapter THREE.

nba!gojo x manager!reader

summary: you thought you'd gotten rid of arrogant NBA star satoru gojo when he left the curses after your first year in basketball management. but when your contract is up three years later, you find yourself working with him once again as the manager for the sorcerers. as you navigate playoff season alongside long-time friend ieiri shoko and the sorcerers' insufferable star player, you start to realize his sudden departure from the curses may not have been what it seemed, and maybe gojo isn't exactly the person (or player) you thought he was, either.

warnings: language, alcohol, sensory overload, mentions of smoking. || sfw. 2.6k words.

FOR ALL YOUR reservations about Gojo, you can’t deny that he is electric to watch.

He scores 11 in the first five minutes, lobbing two three-pointers and then moving up closer, shooting right over Manhattan's massive guards. He passes to Yuji without looking to get him a lay-up, and Kento is getting a good deal of shots in too. The energy in the stadium is infectious, and by the third quarter the Sorcerers are up 98-67. Yaga pulls the starters and lets Yuta and Toge have their moment in the spotlight.

They always play better when they’re on court together, somehow anticipating each other’s moves without any kind of verbal messaging. Toge hardly ever talks, and Yuta isn’t very loud himself; on the court, they’re more in their element than you’ve ever seen them. Their synchronicity in play is mesmerizing, and the Phantoms can’t keep up. Kinji Hakari goes in after a successful Phantoms free throw and prevents Manhattan from getting anything through for a solid eight minutes.

You can’t help yourself—you’re on the sideline with Ieiri and Nobara, cheering the team on even as you make notes. Fushiguro comes off the court drenched in sweat but looking pleased with himself, and Ieiri throws a Gatorade water bottle at Yuji that he proceeds to spray right in his own face before swiping it dry with his jersey.

“Come to join the fun, huh?” Gojo calls to you and the girls as he swaps out with Hakari.

Nobara grins. “Couldn’t stay away.” Gojo winks at you as he readjusts his black headband, ruffling his hair. You raise a brow at his usual brazenness, and he smirks, and everything suddenly feels normal between you.

It’s possible you’ve missed it, just a little.

You’re grinning so wide by the game’s end your cheeks hurt, and Nobara is having a field day with her footage as the rest of the team floods the court and the fans go wild. If you weren’t sure before, this settles it: you’re going to sweep Manhattan.

The NBA playoffs are structured in seven-game series, meaning the first team to win four games moves on in the bracket. The Sorcerers have home-court advantage for the first round as a higher seed than Manhattan, so Monday’s game will also be at home. Then it’s off to the Phantoms' turf for the next two games, and if the Sorcerers win all four, they’ll have a break before semifinals.

“With 121 to Manhattan's 79, it’s looking good for the Sorcerers in round one,” Panda says in your headset. You laugh and tug it down around your neck, shooting Nobara a grin as she corners Gojo for a sideline video. In the short time she’s been here, Nobara’s amassed quite the TikTok following for the team’s page, and most of it is probably fueled by the player interviews.

“Zero casualties,” Ieiri says as she comes up to stand beside you. “Thank the sweet lord.”

“Aren’t you an atheist?” you ask dryly.

Ieiri scoffs and waves her hand. “Agnostic. Irrelevant. Players hurt, zero. Work for me, none. Metaphorical lord, thanked.”

Yuji is hooting and hollering and jumping on Fushiguro’s back, and even Fushiguro can’t fight the slightest smile as he shoves Yuji off. Nobara pulls Yuji off to the side for a video, and then you realize you don’t see Gojo anywhere.

“Hey, Kugisaki,” you call, and she spins to face you with bright eyes. “Where’s Gojo?”

Her brows furrow as she glances at where she just came from. “He was just there. I don’t—huh.” She shrugs apologetically and you wave her off, a no worries, but for some reason something just feels off to you. Gojo’s usually the last one out of the gym, and especially after how well he played today, he should be milking all the attention from the fans. Grabbing your bag, you slip out of the gym and beeline down the hall toward the locker rooms.

You’re done with his weird behavior. You’re going to get to the bottom of it, now.

Turns out, you don’t have to go far. Rounding the corner, you find your six-foot-three nuisance fumbling with a pair of sunglasses, leaned up against the wall.

“Hey.”

He jumps and the sunglasses clatter to the floor, and you nearly startle in return—it’s not often you see Gojo surprised, or taken aback.

“Uh, hey,” he says. “Hey. Sorry, I’m just. I—well.”

“Are you okay?” You feel foolish asking, because clearly he’s not. You find he’s come to a stop just down the hall from your office, and you scoop up his sunglasses and grab his elbow and drag him down the hall.

“Sit,” you say, and something twists in your gut when he doesn’t argue, doesn’t joke, just sinks down into the chair across from your desk. You close the door behind you. “Okay. What’s wrong with you?”

It sounds harsh, but you don’t mean it that way. He’ll beat around the bush if you’re not direct. Might beat around the bush anyway.

“It’s stupid,” he whispers, head in his hands, tugging at his hair.

“I’m sure I’ve heard more stupid, coming from you.”

Your bluntness seems to ease whatever worries he has just a bit, and he says, softly, “Can you—can you turn off the lights?”

Your brain is moving at a thousand miles a minute. And you suddenly, abruptly, get it.

The sunglasses indoors. You seemed off today. Gojo, subdued, quiet, avoidant. I can cover for you. Bright lights. Loud stadiums. One of those days?

Sensory overload.

You’re kicking yourself, because this isn’t new to you. One of your college teammates would get it bad, especially when some huge game was coming up and she was sent spiraling. You and the team had a system for it—dark locker room, noise-canceling headphones.

It makes so much sense you nearly curse yourself out right here for not seeing it.

You flick off the lights, flip the blinds to block out the light from the hallway. Then you cross the room and yank Gojo’s headband right down over his eyes and ears. You don’t have your headphones, so this will have to do for now.

“Oh,” he says.

“Yeah, oh.”

And then the two of you sit in the dark, in the quiet. You sink into your desk chair, resisting the urge to bounce your knee, tap the desk, anything to break the silence. You try to ignore him, at first, and then you give up as your eyes adjust to the dark and you just… watch.

Watch as the shadows and shouts of the team passing in the hallway make Gojo’s hands tighten over his ears, his breath hitching, his head down. Watch as he shuts out the world that’s abruptly become too much.

Watch as slowly, his breathing steadies, the tension bleeds from his shoulders, the grip on his headband loosens, until his hands fall to his lap and he exhales, the end of some great ordeal.

He tugs the headband-turned-blindfold down around his neck and looks at you in the dark.

“I’m sorry.”

It’s not often you hear those words from Gojo’s mouth, and you don’t really know what to do with them, with this entire situation.

“How often?” you ask.

He shrugs. “It’s usually fine.”

“That's not an answer.”

“It’s—I don’t know. It was bad when I was a kid, but I figured it out. I controlled it. It just flares up sometimes, when I’m… stressed.”

You think about him sandwiched between Fushiguro and Yuji on the couch, groaning as Yaga shut down the conversation about San Diego. “Since the playoff bracket came out,” you say.

He looks at you, eyes piercing even in the dark. “I—yeah, I guess.”

“Fushiguro knows, right?”

“What?” His eyes widen and you know you’ve got him off guard, and then something panicked lurches in your chest; you weren’t meant to see those texts. But Gojo’s moved on already. “I mean. Yeah. Kento knows some—not everything. Uh, Shoko knows.”

Briefly, a stab of irritation, or something, flares in your chest. She didn’t tell you.

But then, why would she? She knows you can’t stand Gojo. And it wasn’t her secret to tell; you can’t fault her for that.

You want to push. You do. You want to ask how close he and Fushiguro really are, you want to ask about Geto, about the draft, the blacklisting, the fight. You want to ask what exactly about playoffs has the Satoru Gojo so riled up he can’t focus.

But Gojo suddenly stands, pushing back his chair, and tugs off his headband, twirling it around a finger. “Well, I won’t keep you in the dark, m’lady,” he says with a dramatic bow. You are, you think. You’re keeping me in the dark.

But the mask is back up and whatever vulnerability Gojo’s shown you by mistake is gone, like it was never there. And you realize it’s this that bothers you.

Because you know there’s more than the ungrateful, unbothered NBA star in there, somewhere. Ieiri wouldn’t tolerate him if there wasn’t. You’ve probably, on some level, always known he isn’t truly that shallow. It’s just that every time Gojo seems like he’s human, he retreats faster than you can interact with it, this side of him.

He won’t let you. And that pisses you off.

He grabs the sunglasses you set on your desk and shoves them on before crossing to your office door, letting a flood of fluorescent light in from the hall. It casts him as a silhouette, untouchable as he lingers in your doorframe. Unreachable.

“See you tomorrow, Alley Cat,” he says, like calling you by one of his stupid nicknames will erase whatever softness might’ve come over the room in the last few minutes. He flicks on your office light, and just before he disappears around the corner, you hear him whisper, “Thanks.”

The next day, Gojo’s back to his loudmouth self, and you’re about to shut yourself in a dark office just to escape him.

But at least you know now the reason for his lack of enthusiasm the last few days. And there’s a pair of headphones locked in the second drawer of your office desk.

Satoru Gojo is back and more annoying than ever, and some equilibrium has returned to your chaotic world.

—

It's April 17, and you’ve never been less worried about a game in your life.

Halfway through the Sorcerers absolutely whooping Manhattan's ass, Nobara pulls you aside and points subtly to someone in the stands. “Who is that?” she mutters.

As soon as you register him, you wish you hadn’t.

About halfway up the stands, a man in a stained wife-beater tank and unreasonably baggy jeans stands with a beer in hand, shouting animatedly as the game unfolds. You swear the only thing holding his pants up is the worn-to-hell brown belt with a studded buckle, and you’re not sure how much longer it’ll last. He’s got black gauges in both ears and several tattoos snaking out from beneath his shirt, but at least his hair is impeccably gelled and styled, like always. You know precisely who this is, and you’re torn between laughing and groaning.

“That,” you say flatly, turning to Nobara, “is Yuji’s uncle.”

Her mouth forms a small O as she looks from the man to Yuji, right as he dunks on a frustrated-looking Phantoms player.

“THAT’S MY NEPHEW!” Sukuna hollers, nearly sloshing his beer over the edge of his cup as he throws his hands into the air. Yuji goes beet-red and runs back up the court, head ducked.

Sukuna probably means well. He shows up to Yuji’s games when it matters and he cheers, insanely loudly. You know for a fact he has a slightly-cleaner-than-the-other-shirts shirt for occasions like this one.

But he also has quite the mouth on him, and a temper, and no real sense of boundaries.

Then the ref calls a blocking foul on Yuji.

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?” Sukuna waves his arms and this time definitely splashes beer onto his shirt, but doesn’t seem to notice. He’s screaming like the ref has personally wronged him, and the people around him are either shrinking away with wide eyes or puling out phones with cameras ready. “YOU THINK THAT WAS A FUCKIN’ FOUL? I’LL SHOW YOU FREAKS A GODDAMN FUCKING FOUL—”

“He’s… done this before, then?” Nobara asks uncertainly, and you nod.

“Many times.” You give it another minute tops before security escorts him out.

To be fair, you don’t agree with the call either. Blocking, your ass. Yuji just almost tripped over his own laces.

Nobara tries and fails to stifle a laugh as Yuji drags his palms down his face in exasperation. Cameras are pointed at both him and his uncle. You imagine Nobara will have a lot of mentions to go through later. “And they still let him into these?”

You shrug. “He’s family, and he always starts out sober enough.” To be honest, you’ve always thought Sukuna is kind of funny. He embarrasses Yuji to no end, and he’s loud and disruptive, but the fact that he shows up with his weird perception of put-together and the persistence of his presence is at least entertaining.

Across the court, Megumi’s laughing at Yuji’s bright red face.

Security is dragging Sukuna up the stands by both arms moments later, both of the guards looking incredibly fed up and resigned to their fate of dealing with a drunk, angry uncle for the remainder of the game.

“We still love you, Itadori!” a girl screams from the front row, and Yuji blushes and throws a peace sign her way.

“I love you too!” he shouts, and you swear the girl almost passes out. Megumi snorts and claps Yuji on the back as they move for a Phantoms free throw.

They make it, and you mutter a string of curse words under your breath.

“Okay, Uncle Itadori,” Nobara teases, and you elbow her and laugh. She glances down at her tablet and sighs. “They’ve already made edits. Of Yuji being embarrassed and his uncle yelling. They’re quick with it.”

She tilts her screen toward you, and you see a TikTok captioned YOU SHOW THOSE FREAKS A FUCKING FOUL UNCLE ITADORI LET’S GO.

The free throw doesn’t matter, not really. Yaga puts Junpei in for Kento, and because the Yoshino kid is pretty new and also weirdly short for the NBA—especially as a shooting guard—it might as well be a blatant nice try, but you don't stand a chance to the Phantoms.

You watch as Junpei gets the ball to Gojo and he proceeds to dunk, making the leap look like absolutely nothing. The crowd is going insane, and you almost feel bad for the Phantoms fans who traveled here to watch their own demise.

Almost.

“And that’d be Yuji Itadori’s uncle getting escorted by security once again,” Panda says in your ear. “Gotta hand it to him, he’s persistent.”

“Understatement of the year,” Zenin replies. “Oh, and there goes Satoru ‘Six-Eyes’ Gojo with the dunk! And we’re looking at another forty-point deficit at the end of the third quarter. If the Phantoms can come back from this, color me impressed.”

The buzzer signals the end of the third, and you stand back as the team meets on the sideline. Gojo catches your eye over Fushiguro’s head and grins.

Ieiri’s shoving water bottles at everyone while Yaga and Kusakabe tell them not to get complacent. “We might be kicking ass now, but next game they’ll be on their home turf. You get a handle on their habits now and you don’t let go until the series is over, you hear me?” Yaga shouts.

The team choruses an agreement of yessirs and hell yeahs, and then the fourth quarter is in full swing. Ieiri appears beside you and yawns.

“How many hours?” You know she can hardly ever sleep, but the bags under her eyes are more pronounced than normal.

She shrugs. “I dunno. Three? Maybe? Tell me we’re rooming in New York so we can smoke out the window and talk shit.”

You grin. “Per usual.”

Nobara will be in a room on the same level with one of the assistants, and you’ve paired the guys off the usual way. Gojo and Nanami, Yuji and Megumi, Yuta and Toge. You don’t care if they stick to it, but the names are at least there for the sake of record-keeping. And the team doesn’t typically drift from these arrangements, anyway.

One of the Phantoms’ bigger players seems to have it out for Megumi, and he’s getting more brazen as the score deficit gets higher. Megumi leaps over the player’s outstretched leg and throws his arms up at the ref, and thankfully the ref agrees and fouls him.

“Not slick,” Ieiri mutters, and you nod. Some of the most blatant tripping you’ve seen in years in the NBA.

Megumi takes the free throws and nails both, seemingly unfazed by his own success as the ball goes back into play. Yuji, however, is having a field day and grinning like an idiot.

“That’s our boy!” Gojo shouts, and you don’t have to look to know Fushiguro’s rolling his eyes. The enthusiasm warms your skin, blood humming as the clock counts down. In three days, you’ll all be in New York.

With under a minute left, they’re just having fun now. Itadori makes some obscure hand motion at Gojo and then lobs the ball high to the left of the hoop, and Gojo leaps to dunk. You’re very familiar with that move. It’s always been your favorite.

“A second win for the Sorcerers!” Zenin yells as the clock hits zero, and the guys hoot and holler and gather in the center of the court. “You know what that means, folks. Manhattan's really gonna have to step up their game at home Thursday if they want a chance at advancing…”

“We love you, Satoru!” a group of three girls shout from somewhere in the stands, and Gojo locates them immediately, winking and making a heart with his hands, sending them swooning. Dumbass, you think.

And then he turns back to his team, and somehow winds up looking right at you. Alley-oop, he mouths, and you roll your eyes and wave him off.

You’re pretty sure his smile gets even bigger.

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@shutuppeter @mikikkoo

[markrosewater]

Hey, Mark, I hope you're doing well! My partner is new to Magic and not as enfranchised as I am, so sometimes on our car rides I tell them about ongoing Magic/Blogatog controversies. We were having a discussion about the "trope" controversy from Duskmourn, and I realized you may be able to explain a feeling I had (note: I'm not asking you to change anything related to Magic or explain why it is the way it is; you've had enough of those asks) due to your long experience in writing and media production.

I think "themed worlds" are fine and good. Put me on Rap Land or the Dark World or Video Game World any day of the week. I'm going to expect certain things in those settings, such as microphones, big moons, or extra lives. However, a lot of players felt like "Acrobatic Cheerleader" and "Bonnie Pall" weren't expected elements of the setting, but rather elements from other properties in that genre. If Video Game World had "Maron and Luis, Plumbers Extraordinaire," they'd probably lose their minds. However, such a reference in Rap Land would probably be seen as harmless.

I don't understand why this is the case (though I'm still trying to figure it out) fully. I figured you might have some helpful insight as to why one feels fine and the other sinful.

I hope this ask makes sense. Thanks for all you do, Mark.

We design not for any one player, but for all players. When we make a set, the reason we explore all the trope space is different players will associate with different tropes. Acrobatic Cheerleader might seem irrelevant to you, but is the thing someone else most wanted to see.

[kakishirocream]

Breaking down a bad Frisk and Chara analysis

Honestly, in my opinion this has to be one of the worst analysis on Frisk and Chara

Im not going to elaborate on the AU “Stand In” much. All you have to know is that its vile like all fr*ns aus are, convoluted, and a bland sci fi romance with undertale painted on. Anyways onto my point. And yes, this was made back in 2016 but the OP still believes in that fanon.

They arent a goody two shoes, theyre far from it and they can be sadistic and they dont do things because its good, they do things because “i need to know” “i have to” and does things for fun

Yes, the last image can refer to the Player but in universe it talks about Frisk. This isnt deltarune and undertale’s meta is completely different from deltarune because in undertale the player is non diegetic. while in deltarune the player is diegetic and the meta is more “in your face.” Yes you can bring up Flowey talking to “the player” but thats supposed to be ambiguous about who he is talking to and honestly it is kinda irrelevant if Chara is talking to Frisk or the player at the end of the geno route because again its a in-universe vs out of universe thing. Keep in mind that Undertale isnt necessarily a meta game (aka knows its a game, etc) its a game with Meta themes and things like resets, etc are an in universe thing that can be explained in universe.

Yes, Frisk and Chara represent a mindset of a player but not in that way.

Frisk is not “mercy” they are completionism, curiosity, emotional attachment (which can be perverted sentimentality), child like wonder, and the memories you cherish and the joy you have from playing the game, enjoying heartfelt stories and characters you grow to love. The memories you cherish and the joy transcends video game metrics and number based rewards.

However again like mentioned Earlier, Frisk has no morals whatsoever and does things because they're curious and does things for fun even things that are depraved and disgusting.

Chara not just “fight” they are your True RPG character and their name is whatever you want. Theyre the representation of the addiction to number based rewards and the desire to reach “the absolute.” Theyre represented by the number 9 the final single digit number.

Even in the pacifist route there is that feeling of wanting a number based reward. Even by just wanting more GOLD they are that feeling.

*sigh*

OF FUHCKING COURSE YOU ARE ALSO TRYING TO JUSTIFY YOUR BELOVED SHIP BY MAKING THINGS UP AND SEVERELY MISCHARACTERIZING AND MISSING THE POINT.

Again, Chara is the addictive feeling to numbers going up in games however they are not that’s doing the murders nor they even want to kill monsters until the end. Again, Frisk is NOT the innocent uwu bean, they are pretty much as just as responsible because they have the right mindset to even ensure the geno route is possible from the very start as mentioned. Also, i have to bring up the fact the player is non diegetic in UT AGAIN like i had to bring up previous points again.

Im not gonna bother diving into the au parts of the analysis, just the OPs thoughts on what they think the meta is. The last part just completely gets frisk‘s personality wrong. They are NOT introverted and Quiet

Thank you for reading, im concluding this thread. PLEASE do not harass the OP because it will cause more harm than good

These docs by @lazynickname would be useful if you want to know more about frisk and chara.

[theaceineverycase]

Everyone please go and watch this

Basically a former HER employee decided to react to the entire series of Everything Wrong With Nancy Drew videos and add her own perspective and some insider info

For example

Certain voice actors are not credited because they were random people connected with the company who didn't want their names used

Pretty much any time something interesting happens out of Nancy's view it really is "to save on animation"

A lot of completely irrelevant but humorous bits are left in the games specifically because they are humorous (such as the rehearsal recordings in LIE)

The reason we can open the Snack Shop at random ass times is because everyone complained so much about mandatory cooking hours in ICE

The reason Nancy can't just smash down doors is literally because of the ESRB (apparently having the player deliberately destroy an object breaks the terms of E for Everyone)

The ending to SCK remaster was affected by ESRB as well - the original game's ending had to be completely changed because E restrictions had tightened between 98 and 2010, and also this is why the culprit knocks Nancy out with the gun instead of the more logical option

A LOT of the common complaints are ones that she has as well and some of them and she even brought some of them up to the team before release

This certainly isn't everything so please go and check out the videos!

[sankakuto]

I have a lot of thoughts about the first Pyramid Head cutscene (in remake and OG) and I feel like I need to get them out. bare with me.

I'm going to be talking about the first Pyramid Head cutscene and whether or not it is implying SA so heres a TW for discussion of SA

I am a die-hard OG fan, and have been for a decade. I have been in this discussion for so long, and I feel like my take on this might be the less popular take for some reason? but honestly I believe that a player's individual interpretation of the scene is the one that is the most true. in the most simple words - if you see the scene as being s*xual or implying s*xual violence, then that is valid and is just how youve analyzed the scene based on the context you've been given or the life experience you have.

I KNOW Masahiro Ito has said that the scene involves nothing like that, no assault, just Pyramid Head trying to kill some mannequins... but is the creator's canon events of the scene really that important when as a player we see a sexualized monster being brutalized by a bigger, more imposing monster and are made to feel like we're a voyeur to something we shouldn't be watching?

and that feeling has to be entirely intentional as well, considering the scene is actually inspired by a movie called Blue Velvet (directed by David Lynch). the scene in the movie involves the character hiding in a closet while watching someone be SA'd, watching through the gaps in the door. and at the end of the movie, even shoots the perpetrator from the same spot in the closet. the cutscene in the game is a direct reference to this movie, and after watching the movie I can say it has some other influences on the game as well.

but even that is almost completely irrelevant, because as a first time player that doesn't have any context about the inspirations behind the game, and doesn't know about the things that the devs have stated are canon or not, we see something that is raw and uncomfortable and invokes a feeling of disgust. we are not given any other context besides what's directly in front of us. we see a creature that is all legs writhing in pain or agony in front of a thrusting Pyramid Head, who is desperately trying to hold the mannequin in place. and as we view this scene and hide, the Red Pyramid Thing turns his focus to us, and makes James feel like he has intruded upon something he wasn't supposed to see. there is a voyeuristic quality to the scene that adds to the feeling of unease and gives us this idea that something s*xual in nature has happened.

I think that video games are art, especially games like this, and an artist can definitely have a clear or direct implication of the message they are sending (and they can even tell you how it's supposed to be viewed), but ultimately the person consuming the art is going to analyze themes in their own way and find their own interpretation of the idea presented to them. in some way some might consider this type of interpretation to be "headcanon" because the actual canon of the game differs based on Ito's statements, but in my own opinion I do believe this sort of interpretation is just the player coming to a natural conclusion based on the context presented to them.

in other words, I think that it's completely fair to take Masahiro Ito at face value and trust his input that the scene is NOT at all s*xual, but at the same time it is presented in a way that can imply that it is and someone drawing that conclusion instead is also completely valid.

[rationalisms]

sorry to discourse about the sexuality of video game characters but re: the whole "playersexual" debate...

this idea that people always either subtly imply or outright state in arguments around this is this sort of snide "well why would any of these people caaaaare about something so frivolous as gender when they have Real Problems!" (which you can also swap as needed in sci-fi with "well obviously in The Future everyone would have learned to be bisexual").

which is like. wildly homophobic obviously. outrageously so. this idea of gay people as someone who's just hung up on irrelevant or superficial parts of a person unlike people who Care About Someone's Soul, OR the idea that gay people are not sufficiently progressive enough and need to get with the times, is not even a new or innovative strain of homophobia. and yet i constantly see people repeat it confidently in discussions around "playersexuality" or video game romances with zero thought or care to how insensitive and cruel of a statement they're making. it's bugfuck insane.

also, it's not even like bi people are winning with the current status quo either, because these characters are almost never actually textually bisexual, they're just whatever sexuality matches up with the player avatar's gender. very few of them are openly attracted to the same gender outside of the romance path, or at all part of the wider lgbt community. (and no, a few missable party banters here or there with wink wink nudge nudge style comments does not count as either of those things.)

i would rather there be characters whose orientation is incompatible with mine and whose romance path i therefore might never experience, than there be a world which either implicitly or explicitly features absolutely zero gay people.

(as a complete side argument, i find this obsession with having to Experience Absolutely All The Content in one go and it being somehow a bad thing if there's things you might not see in this specific playthrough of a game a really weird idea too. and it's imo also not a good philosophy for game design, especially crpgs which by nature are supposed to branch widely and allow the option to experience the story differently depending on the choices you make. but that's only tangentially relevant.)

anyway. lesbian party members or bust.

[olderthannetfic]

So FFXIV has been experiencing some intermittent DDOS attacks this past week or so.

I saw someone online talking about how upset it made them because the DDOS was interfering with timed windows for catching rare fish in the game. They patiently explained, addressing the people behind the DDOS, how the timed windows work and that the DDOS is very upsetting because it makes people miss the rare fish and have to wait (up to a month!) for the next chance.

Their tone was patient and polite, as if they genuinely thought that someone DDOSing a popular MMO would feel bad and stop upon learning that the loss of service was upsetting and inconveniencing players.

I don't know why don't get it. The reason people DDOS popular video games is to either harm the company (in which case the feelings of the players are irrelevant) or because they think it's funny to break other people's toys. In either case, they'd be overjoyed to learn that their attack was interfering with timed gameplay.

Don't feed the trolls. Don't assume that trols are only trolling because they don't know that trolling is annoying.

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