#Irish salmon fly

[papiermachecat]

Helloooooo anyone who still follows me! I figured I’d better do a writeup of my pilgrimage to Slane with some notorious fellow tumblr hags because most of THEM are headed to Wembley for multiple shows which is fine and I’m not jealous at all because it’s FINE.

Amongst other things, in this writeup I will address A) my first time flying internationally (0/10 would do again but did not enjoy) B) the very flexible meaning of “5 minute walk” coming from an Irish or British person, C) the Irish weather (glorious), and D) the personal shortcomings of everyone I met on the trip (this section WILL be lengthy)*

Anyway my last day of school with students was Thursday June 8, and yesterday I had to be at work to do summer cleanup & checkout. In between I flew to Dublin???? Met my friends?? Almost died(more on that later)! And came back home! It’s insanity. So I waved goodbye to the buses on Thursday, raced home, dyed my hair (? I was not thinking clearly), packed, and was at the airport by 5:45 PM. “Wow!” you might be thinking, “She’s clearly very efficient and organized!” Unless you’ve ever spent two (2) minutes with me, then you know better. So yeah, flight was uneventful, Aer Lingus is kinda crappy but if you were seated in the first 10 rows you had a chance of getting an ice cube in your water so there’s that.

Upon arrival at Dublin, I met up with the fabulous @aggresivelyfriendly fresh from Italy and we had the loveliest taxi driver chat with us through sunny Dublin and drop us at the door of our very hip boutique hotel and I thought wow, these taxi drivers are so nice! Can’t wait to meet more of them! HAHAHAHA anyway

At the hotel we met up with fellow Americans @chasm2018 and @accidentalharrie , soon joined by the best UK/Ireland team since Harry & Niall, the delightful @cantquitu and @justharried as well as the famed, Harry-endorsed Mr. Justharried, who not only endured our company but even gave a good show of enjoying it! A fine man indeed 😘. Anyway yes, we hugged, we chatted, we ate, it was GRAND. A plan was formulated! Pop down to early merch, see a few sights, have a little lunch, shop a bit maybe, then dinner…all sounded lovely. Bit of walking, they said. Not very far, they said. Just down the road! they said.

So anyway we get to early merch—just a 10-15 minute walk with lovely weather, and there was NO LINE. None. Walked in, walked up to the counter, bought stuff, done. Blew my mind tbh. Okay great! Headed over to have snacks (the authentic Irish delicacy they call “nachos” idk if you’ve heard of them) and drinks at a church in front of a bronze bust of Arthur (I think?) Guinness, tended to by a very charming waiter who seemed accustomed to crazy Americans who want ice in their water. 10/10.

Side note: I wanted to hear some authentic Irish music. You know, walk by a pub and hear some Celtic ballad being sung while emotional old men all hold up their mugs of foamy beer, right? Well. As it turns out, their musical selections in a bar are pretty much what you’d hear here and I saw NO emotional old men swaying with their pints up as they sang along :/. But we wandered and cantquitu told us tales of her misspent youth in the thrift shops and it was lovely! 10/10

Another “”5 minute walk”” and we were at dinner, which was so lovely. No ice water, naturally, but lovely nonetheless! I had a traditional Irish salmon and tortellini with edamame. FUN FACT: 75% of the world’s supply of edamame is grown in Dingle, Ireland, famously home to Fungi (pronounced FUN-ghee) the dolphin, may he rest in peace. (Parts of that fact are actually true btw, but not the edamame part.)

A quick jaunt (45 miles or so) back to the hotel for more drinks and then off to bed to rest up for HARRYYYYYYYY!! I began to have serious regrets about my footwear choices, and rightly suspected that Saturday could be worse, but HARRY!!!!

STATS: step count: 18K // Ubers taken: 0 // successful acquisitions of a beverage with ice in it: 2 // painful blisters formed: 3

So on Saturday I switched up my shoes and hopes for the best. A quick 5 minute/6 mile walk* to the coach pickup spot and shortly we were on a stifling bus to Slane!! Expect a 20-30 minute walk to the venue, Ticketmaster told me HAHAHA anyway we get dropped off in a cow pasture (FUN FACT: Irish pastures are the lumpiest in the world*), somehow adopt two Irish teenagers who didn’t know until day of that they were supposed to have a chaperone over 25, poor things (I better never catch Lenna & Lily—cantquitu’s beloved nieces—complaining about hags in the fandom!), and off we go! Anyway after the short cow pasture walk and a bridge crossing there was a security check and I thought gosh this wasn’t bad at all! Surely security wouldn’t be set up 46 miles from the venue right? So I strolled through this wooded area, pleasant weather, good company, nice breeze…for perhaps 2-3 hours? Idk might’ve been a bit shorter but I definitely at one point said “Do you think this is some kind of prank? Like just to see how far we’ll walk?” Genuinely, it was FOREVER. My footwear choices had not been sound, my blisters from the day before were so ouchy oh and FUN FACT: the average preferred walking speed of my companions is a 5-minute mile. Which is like a 3-second kilometer, I did the math.*

ANYWAY. The first sign of civilization we saw was a stone wall with a hand-painted sign that I will post here

Please note this is not my photo and must be older as there are now 23 KILLED. SO FAR. Cantquitu told me that is one of her favorite Irish traditions* idk seemed a bit dark to me but 🤷🏻‍♀️

So we’re clearly there, right?? Hahahaha no. Another few billion miles later there’s another security check, then a ticket scan, THEN we’re at the top of a massive hill with merely 6 more miles* to walk to get to our Hollywood pod. I’ve drawn you a map of our route which I will post here.

Once we were settled, it was as you’d expect. So happy. So much fun. I ~almost forgot about the death march I had endured and tried to forget about the inevitably worse one awaiting us���though turns out there was an easier path home—still ages, and done in a sea of people, but easier!

Anyway you all probably saw the show or the best bits of it on video but here are my standout moments that wouldn’t have been captured on a livestream:

• the ADORABLE Scottish couple next to us with the guy being THE biggest harrie—knew every word, every drum fill, every 1-2-3-4…his girlfriend was a sweetheart too but just may have been the lesser into Harry between the two lol—we hugged goodbye and I hope they have a wonderful life ❤️

• the absolute shock of hurrying back from the bathrooms (such as they were 😬) while I Wanna Dance With Somebody was playing and seeing like…nobody….dancing. The disrespect!!!!

• the fact that About Damn Time and 24K Magic were the favorites from Annie Mac’s set that’s RIGHT! YAY AMERICA!!!!!! Idk some other songs played that I guess people liked or whatever but let’s be real

• if you have seen a pic of Harry in his favorite little brown leisurewear up at the castle you can thank…I want to say justharried? Might’ve been the mister who originally spotted him? but it was 1000% justharried who played Paul Revere and soon the entire crowd was staring at him. He moved his arm in a gesture that was NOT a wave but looked at the start like it possibly COULD have been a wave and literally the whole crowd started waving at him…it was so cute but needless to say he retreated soon after before re-emerging for Mitch’s set

• During Fine Line I looked at aggressively friendly and she was crying and then I of course immediately cried as I do and then we swayed and cried and it was just…a moment. Telling myself that things will be alright has become very difficult in my life these past few years and it felt both cathartic and bittersweet and just…all the things ❤️

• My entire posse collaborating to get my feet OUT of my shoes and IN to cantquitu’s extra flip-flops she’d brought along (a size too big for her but two sizes too small for me—before you start picturing me as Sasquatch or something I wear a very normal size US 8!) which genuinely felt SO much better and I don’t think I’d have made it back otherwise, thank you ❤️

And I’ve thought of so many funny things to say but tumblr crashed the first time I wrote this and I had to redo it again and I lost it so just know, it was worth every bit of blood (and yes there was blood), sweat (soooo much sweat) and tears (Tam’s fault!!) and I’d do it all over again no question!!

[pubz77]

Orange And Gold Shrimp Fly A classic Irish Shrimp Fly

[coinandcandle]

Loki Deity Guide

Loki’s mythology is not as chaotic as you may think…

It’s even more chaotic than that!

Who is Loki?

Often referred to as the Trickster God of the Aesir, Loki is actually the son of Fárbauti a giant, or a Jötunn, and Laufey, who was said to be a goddess. Though Loki is often referred to using he/him pronouns, can change his shape and gender at will.

While many of the old stories involving Loki paint him in a negative light, the same cannot be said for Loki’s modern followers.

Parents and Siblings

Fárbauti (Father)

Laufey (Mother), sometimes referred to as Nál.

Býleistr (Brother)

Helblindi (Brother)

Lovers or Partners

Sigyn (Wife)

Angrboda (Lover)

Children

Nari or Narfi (from Sigyn)

Hel (From Angrboda)

Jörmungandr (From Angrboda)

Fenrir (From Angrboda)

Sleipnir (From Svadilfari)

Epithets

Loptr (Old Norse meaning “Air”)

Hveðrungr (Roarer)

Contriver of all fraud

Shape-Changer

Sly-One

Wizard of Lies

Thief of Giants

Evil Companion

Kinsman of Sleipnir

Foe of the Gods

Forger of Evil

Contriver of Baldr’s death

Wrangling Foe of Heimdallr

Notes

Loki was known to be mischievous and at times malicious, but he was also rather helpful in many stories.

At some point Loki’s name became conflated with Logi, meaning “fire”, however, Logi is a separate being and is the Nordic personification or god of fire. Many blame Richard Wagner for this mix-up.

It is also possible that Loki’s name means “knot” or “tangle”.

It has been debated whether or not the Finnish "Lukki" (the name for a spider with thing, long legs) came from the same root as "Loki" ("luka" the proto-germanic word for "lock") but this is not a very popular belief and there is very little evidence to back it up.

Though Loki is part Jötunn, he is seen as part of the Aesir.

My personal favorite story of Loki is Þrymskviða, in which Loki and Thor disguise themselves as women in order to get Thor’s hammer back.

Sleipnir, Loki’s son, is an eight-legged horse that came to be when Loki had to transform into a mare in order to drive away the great stallion, Svadilfari. While Loki was in the form of a mare, the two came together to create Sleipnir who was said to be the fastest and best horse in all of the nine realms. Odin eventually chose Sleipnir as his steed.

One of the most popular tales involving Loki gets its namesake from the god, the Lokkasenna.

Loki ends up punished by the Aesir for either killing Baldr or for the events that take place in Lokkasenna. He is bound in a cave by the intestines of one of his offspring, his son Nari is turned into a wolf, and a venomous snake is placed above his head and drips venom into his eyes. Sigyn holds a shell above his head to protect him from the venom but every so often needs to empty the shell and the venom drips into his eyes once more.

In myth, it is said that Ragnarök will begin when Loki breaks free from his bondage.

Loki has been conflated with Lugh, the Irish deity due to their similar prankster and chaotic nature as well as the slight similarity of their names.

Modern Deity Work

There is no evidence that Loki had a cult or large following until modern times, so many of these correspondences, offerings, etc are going to be based on Loki’s mythology and current Lokeans’ posts.

Correspondences

Rocks/Stone/Crystals

Bloodstone

Opal

Opalite

Pyrite

Herbs/Plants

Cinnamon

Birch (Loki is mentioned in the Norwegian Rune poem for Berkano/a, or Birch)

Dragon’s Blood

Mistletoe

Bentgrass “Loke’s Grass”

Dandelion “Loke’s Bloom”

Haircap Moss “Loke’s Oats”

Animals

Snake

Horse

Wolf

Spider

Salmon

Fly

Symbols

Snake

Air

Feathers

Kuanaz (Rune)

Berkano (Rune)

Offerings

Sweet foods

Sour foods

Cinnamon

Chocolate

Alcohol

Meat charred to ash

Mead

Acts of Devotion

Offering your time to Loki

Trying to understand the misunderstood

Don’t be afraid to go against the grain

Keep in mind that these are only some ideas for offerings and correspondences! Items and activities that connect you to her in a more personal way are just as good, and often better, than those you find on the internet. As with any relationship, feel it out, ask questions, and be attentive and receptive!

References and Further Reading

Loki - Britannica

Loki - Wikipedia

Loki - Norsemythology.com

Loki - Mythopedia

The Poetic Edda - translated by Henry Adams Bellows (Via Sacred Texts)

Loki in Norse Mythology - World History Edu

Symbols for Loki - Lokeanwelcomingcomittee

Loki Devotees and Followers to check out:

@lokeanwelcomingcommittee

@skaldish

@the-fox-jawed-witch

@jasper-pagan-witch

@broomsick

@grumpylokeanelder

@elizatungusnakur

as suggested by the community <;3

[chaosnoirjpg]

cultivating joy list

Things that make me happy or think or whatever...[not limited to]

Fat babies

Tiny things

That boop sound from the mathematical video

Good music

Good poetry

Good art

good conversation

A genuine smile

A genuine laughter

Sunsets and sunrises

Cool rainy days

Cold rainy days

Sitting in my car while it rains

Jamming out to music in my car

Singing in the shower

Singing in my car

Being held by a loved one

Holding a loved one

Dancing with my dogs in the nighttime

Watching Ghibli films

Buttered bread

Reading Hannibal lecture books

Philosophical discussion

Breakfast food any time of the day

Coldwater on a humid night

Dancing in my room in the dark

Shitting in the bathroom in the dark

Baby cooing

Puppy's first a-wooo

Puppy hitching a ride on a duck

Baby hugs a puppy

Pizza.

Katsu curry.

Peach cobbler.

Banana pudding without the Banana.

Sweet potato pie.

Lovingly regarded without motive

Bear hugs

Gently petting

Loving caress

Being present

Mediating together

Writing love poems

Doing what you love

Doing what makes you smile

Paradoxical theories and ways of thought

Anthropology

Sociology

Social Science Ethnic Studies

The way people and the world think and move in the world

The light in your heart after you've processed and healed dense emotions

Creating for yourself only

Loving yourself completely

Inner knowing that you cannot deny

Child taller than their parents

Child taller than an adult

Younger sibling taller than older sibling

Musicians making music on the fly

Ppl saying birds aren't real

Horror movies

Comedy, drama, murder mystery movies

Ugly big mansions

Beautiful architecture

80's hair

Fucked hairstyles

Authenticity

Chill vibes

The color Teal

The smell of coffee

Soft and crunchy cookies

Chocolate long johns donuts

Waffles

Fried hard eggs

Pancakes

Buttered toast

Turkey bacon and sausage

Sausage and baked beans

Baked beans

Blackened salmon with veggies and mashed potatoes

Shroom tea

Clicky keyboard

Pill bottle sounds

Clicky pen/pencil

Pickles

Pickle juice

Cranberry juice

Moisturized skin

Dry brushing

Body tingles

Ant wars

Creatures in the sea

Conspiracy iceberg

The word sonder

The word moledro

Obscure emotions

Ambiguous colors: Teal, periwinkle, etc

Cool facial wipes

Made bed

Soft blankets

Soft pillows

Nice smelling candle

Fruit bowl

Houseplants

Flourishing garden

Sunlight

Starry night sky

Goya paintings

Orange juice

RnB soul

Emo rap

Alt rock

Common sense

The morning time

The night time

Soaking in the tub

Hot shower

Cool shower

Starting over

New perspective

Love songs from the 80's

Playing with their baby

Playing with their dog

Iridescent beetles

Iridescent bug wings

Iridescent anything

Not taking life seriously…bc the universe has a sick sense of humor my guy

Surfer dude accents

Scottish accents

Irish accents

Dinosaurs.

Vibing out

Chicago Architecture

Clean bathroom

Edibles

Tea hot and cold

River

Waterfall

Sense of awe and wonder

Sweet potato fries

Mom keeps buying off-brand cheerios by accident and now we have several boxes of non-brand cheerios

Ppl wearing glasses for aesthetic

Getting inebriated

Broad city

Flight of the concords

The office

Arrested development

New girl

The fountain movie and graphic novel

Shoulder massages

Tempura sushi

Good food with loved ones

Self-discovery

Hoodie

Big afro

Beautiful tattoos

Teeth

Rengoku

Demon slayer

Jujutsu kaisen

Nail art

Vincent Van Gogh

Vincent Van Gogh's brother and sister-in-law

Eyeliner art

Brain tickles

Hogwarts architecture

Indie movies

Indie music

Sagitterrorist lol

Scorpihoe lol

Thrift store

String instruments

Anime, dubbed teehee

Black boy joy

black men acting a dayum fool

titties

thighs

chicken thighs

flats

sweet chili sauce

thai food

spring rolls

Mothers approval

Dogs love

Animal affection

Pets love and affection

Nightmare core synthetic wave music

Puns like corny puns

Wednesdays

Thursdays

Fridays

Sunday risings

Skin care routines

Curly hair routines

Babies looking at themselves in the mirror

Babies being afraid of their own shadow

Musicians with beautiful minds and souls

Toothpaste

The right lipstick

Good hair days

Le twins

Twins in general

Black alternative gender-ambiguous beings

MUSIC:

RnB

RnB soul

Rap

Alt rock

Alt rap

Indie rock

House music

FOOD:

Thai food

Japanese tempura sushi

katsu curry

Chicken Tikka masla

Tea in general

Mac and cheese

Cheese toast

Chocolate chip cookies

Banana pudding no bananas

Peach cobbler

sweet potato pie

Jumex

Shrimp tacos

Blackened salmon

Lobster tails

Grilled chicken

Outback steakhouse

Strawberry banana smoothie

Egg rolls

Shrimp rolls

Teriyaki chicken

bourbon chicken

cookie dough ice cream

Caramel ice cream

Cookies and cream ice cream

Nachos

Loaded fries

Pizza

Sweet spicy chili wings

Crunchy fries

Honey mustard sauce

Caesar salad

Mediterranean sandwich/salad

Waffles

Pancakes

Ice coffee

Hashbrowns

eggs fried hard

peanutbuter and honey sandwich

tomatoe soup

Grilled oysters

Tuna salad

Pasta

ART:

Frances Goya

Vincent van gogh

LMJ works

Marc Rebillet

Kendrick Lamar

Kenny mason

Chris Fleming

Dave Chappell

bill hicks

Bo Burnham

Lakieth Stanfield

Le twins

Frankjavcee

whyt manga

Likelihood art

LANGUAGE//SAYINGS:

Think mark think

You got my head spinning out of control

Grief is love persisting

Everything the light touches is ours/our kingdom

Animals:

Quakka

Kasawari

emu

Ostrich

jaguar

cheetah

Jellyfish

octopus

squid

whale

Turtle

tortoise

dog

Cats on screen only

Crow

owl

frog

High animals From the vet

PLACES:

Africa

Australia

Japan

islands

Northern lights

The split sea

Nighttime glow Beach

Black sands Beach

Dessert

Mountains

redwood forest

THINGS:

Thighs

Titties

Clean teeth

sweet smile

Big expressive eyes

Sharp cat-eye makeup

Good lipstick

New purse smell

Purses that smell like a pleasant perfume or lotion

Cracking creme brulee

Dipping hands in a bag full of beans

Warm tea on a cool rainy day

Looking up at the sky to see the stars and moon

Feeling the rain on my skin

A warm bath by candlelight

Dinner by candlelight

Reading or journaling by candlelight

Sunbathing in a hammock

Sleeping under the stars

Genuine laughter

The look of love and affection

Completing a project

A job well done

Making it out alive

Dancing like no one is watching

Singing like no one is listening

A good book

Pillow fights

Intimate soulful talks at 3am

3am

Twilight

Dusk

Sunsets

Sunrises

Cold rain

Washed hair

Moisturizer

Body oil

Tea tree oil

Eucalyptus oil

Lavender oil

Intense burning

Lit candle

Oil burner

House plants

Clean kitchen

Hidden storage

Northern lights

Hot showers

Wine

Night drives

Pedicure

The clicking of heels

Keyboard clicks

Pills shifting in a bottle

Retractable pen clicks

Geometric architecture

Emerald windows

The color Teal

Looney toons

most ghibli movies

Afros

Edibles

Head massages

[zeldaseyebrows]

Graham Crackers and the Lunch Date from Hell 

Theme: Choking  AU: Modern botw. Scientist/Environmentalist!Zelda and Waiter!Link Word Count: 3.4k Rating: Non-explicit but with suggestive jokes/thoughts Warnings: Choking, non-graphic mention of vomiting related to choking, near-death experience, bullying/general assholery (not from Link or Zelda)  Happy Ending: YES Notes: Irish Accent Link dedicated to my conversations with my amazing, non-judgmental friend @ghostgirl19posts and Nerdy Scientist Zelda’s love for all things nature and bio dedicated to @newtsnaturethings who is my favorite naturalist and fellow outdoorsy friend.

All in all, Zelda thinks when she looks back on the fateful autumn day, dying had somehow not been the worst part of the date.

Which is really saying something.

The venue doesn’t give any clues to the disaster brewing. Golden afternoon sun streams through the ostentatiously large bay windows of the country club overlooking the sprawling golf course and vast ocean just beyond. Seagulls and birds fly above in the clear blue sky, cries carrying on the warm autumn breeze.

Zelda gazes out through the glass, wishing she could be a seagull. Or really any type of bird. Or even a damn bug if it would get her away from this lunch and the Polo Ralph Lauren popped collar wearing douchebag sitting across from her.

Said douchebag, Graham, tries to play footsie with her, bumping his sockless, boat shoe clad foot against her leg. At the nudge, Zelda yanks her leg back and ends up kicking her chair hard enough to bruise.

Well, a bruise is a sacrifice I’m willing to make, Zelda thinks. Unlike goddamn Graham, who wouldn’t even watch Doctor Who or Planet Earth with me but watches golf for hours.

Zelda frowns and resumes gazing outside. When they arrived at the country club, Zelda had wanted to sit outside on the sprawling patio dining area, but Graham had insisted on being inside. As Zelda agreed to this entire lunch for the express purpose of breaking up with him, she had conceded. But now she regrets even that concession.

Just one more hour, Zelda tells herself in a desperate bid to get through this hell. Survive one more hour, tell him during dessert, and it’s all over. You’ll never have to be with this pompous douche that your father begged you to go out with again. You’ll be free. No more popped collar polo shirts or salmon shorts or boat shoes or condescension about your hobbies and profession. Never again. You’ve survived a month with him, you can survive one more hour.

Zelda’s so immersed in the fantasy of breaking up with Graham and chucking her heels off to run across the golf course and onto the beach that she doesn’t even notice the server arrive at their table.

“Good afternoon,” a man with a low and lilting accent says, “my name is Link and I’ll be your server. Could I get you both started with some drinks?”

Zelda plasters on her best fake smile and glances up at the poor soul unlucky enough to be waiting on them this fateful day.

Oh, Zelda thinks as her smile falters for a split second. Oh my god, he’s attractive.

Link’s sandy hair is pulled half back with an almost artful sort of messiness from a face that could launch a thousand ships. Or maybe a thousand right swipes, to be more precise.

She can’t quite judge his height sitting down, but it’s obvious he’s not exactly busting his head on any doorframes. Though under his white button-up shirt, he seems quite well built. The way he’s rolled up the sleeves over his tan forearms is certainly doing him some favors.

Zelda gulps.

But even more than his objective physical blessings, the most attractive part of Link is that something about him just seems kind. Maybe it’s the slight crinkle lines by his eyes or how the smile he gives them is far more genuine than they deserve. Whatever it is, it’s something that Zelda wants to hold on to, grab to her chest, maybe cuddle with a little bit.

Her meditation on Link’s objective attractiveness and what she dubs his “aura of nice” is shattered by Graham’s nasal, affected chuckle.

“Link?” he jokes. “Just like sausage link, right? You’re from overseas; did your parents name you after breakfast food?”

“Really, Graham?” she snaps out to him. “Really?”

To call the name statement hypocritical would be to say that Zelda enjoys nature or that Graham has a fondness for Vineyard Vines. In other terms, an understatement of exponential magnitude.

Turning to poor Link, whose face has started to flush, Zelda says, “I’m so sorry. Please excuse him.”

“Oh please, it’s all in good fun.” Graham waves his hand at her in dismissal. Then, to Zelda’s absolute horror, Graham puts on a terrible mockery of Link’s accent and says, “O, ae’m sahrry, mate, I dedn’t mean it.”

Rage like nothing she’s ever felt before fills Zelda and there’s nothing she wants to do more than take the salad fork and stab it deep into Graham’s throat.

As she barely restrains herself from committing very justified homicide, Link’s face finishes its transformation into burning red. Lowering it and appearing lost for words, he stares a hole down at his shined shoes.

In that moment, Zelda decides that Link is getting tipped 200%. And Graham is going home in a body bag. Right after he gets dumped.

“You need to stop now,” she hisses at Graham. “I’m so sorry for this, Link. You have a lovely name.”

Link scratches the back of his head and glances up at her. “Er, it’s alright, you don’t need to apologize. Could I get any drinks for you?”

Zelda does not miss the slight emphasis Link puts on “you.” Nor how he is only talking to her now.

Graham butts in with, “I’ll have a pilsner and she’ll have some lemon water.”

“Bloody Mary. Strong, please.”

Link nods and gives her a slight smile. “I’ll make it extra strong, just for you.”

300%.

“Thank you so much.”

Zelda thinks Link winks at her before turning around and making his way back to the kitchen, but she can’t be sure, not daring to hope.

With barely contained venom, Zelda tells Graham, “That was unacceptable. You can’t talk to people like that. You can’t treat people like that.”

“It’s all in good fun, don’t worry. And he’s the help, it can’t be helped. Heh. Not like he minds.”

“I mind.”

The temptation to break up with him at that instant overwhelms Zelda. And the temptation to murder him with the salad fork. But she fights it down, knowing that it would lead to a more drawn-out spectacle. She needs to be strategic. And maybe not actually commit homicide, no matter how justified.

Drawing upon every iota of will she has, Zelda manages to keep it together until Link comes back with their drinks to take their food order. His face isn’t flushed anymore, but he only looks at Zelda. Not that Graham seems to notice.

“You look familiar,” Graham drawls, giving Link a once-over. “Where have we seen you before?”

“Er, I live around here. And I’m a park ranger so I’m out and about a lot.”

“A park ranger?” Graham snickers. “Well, that certainly doesn’t seem like it would pay the bills.”

Link gives a forced laugh. “That’s why I’m here.”

400%. Also he just got even more attractive. God, he probably makes even those dorky ties look good.

“I can’t believe we haven’t met before,” Zelda says, barely able to contain the excitement in her voice. “I’m in the park all the time with the clean-up crew.”

Graham waves his hand. “She loves all that outdoorsy shit.”

For the first time since the Accent Incident of Assholery, Link deigns to turn his gaze over at Graham. It’s only to glare. And if looks could kill, Graham would be six feet under hugging the Patek Philippe his father gave him in his lonely grave.

Sadly, Link’s glare doesn’t kill and Graham remains tragically alive. He also doesn’t even notice, as he’s too preoccupied with denigrating Zelda’s interests and work. As per usual.

“I do look a bit different out there, so maybe that’s why you didn’t recognize me” Link says to Zelda. “Lots of boots and waterproof overalls and dorky hats. Less aprons. Still a nametag, though.”

At the teasing tone of voice, Zelda’s lungs empty and her stomach scrunches up.

Is he flirting with me? Please for the love of everything holy let him be flirting with me.

Figuring she doesn’t have much to lose, Zelda decides to go for it and replies, “Oh no, do you wear those zip-off cargo pants too? How about those vests with all the pockets?”

“Yes and yes,” Link answers with a grin. “Even a fanny pack.”

Zelda gasps in mock horror. “That is delightfully dreadful. I love it. You know, Graham makes fun of me for wearing a camelbak when I’m hiking and running.”

“Well, I happen to love camelbaks. They are incredibly practical.”

500%.

With a loud cough, Graham makes his douchey presence known.

“I’ll have the oysters on the half-shell and the lobster dinner,” he orders with a glare to Link. “She’ll have the garden salad.”

“I’ll have the French onion soup and the mushroom gnocchi. Thank you, Link.”

“You’re welcome,” Link replies with a small smile.

When she grabs Graham’s menu since he apparently can’t be assed to muster up even a modicum of polite and hands them over to Link, their fingers brush against each other.

Something burns hot in the pit of Zelda’s stomach at the contact. Link stares at her for a moment before he leaves and Zelda isn’t sure if she’s imagining the slight flush that spreads across his face this time. But she definitely isn’t imagining the grin.

The warmth of his fingers against hers doesn’t fade.

“I really wish you wouldn’t undermine me like that,” Graham grumbles as he sips his pilsner.

“And I wish you wouldn’t be so rude and classless.”

Zelda takes a swig of her Bloody Mary and gives silent thanks to Link. Of course he had it made strong enough to knock a Goron off their feet. Which is perfect, since Zelda’s going to need an ocean of alcohol to get through this lunch.

When their food arrives, Zelda tucks in, trying valiantly to ignore the slurping of oysters and cracking of lobster across the table.

This is my personal hell. This is worse than having to listen to people be wrong about biology and mansplain basic physics to me. This is worse than when I gave myself food poisoning because I took a gamble on some meat and lost. Am I actually dead and in hell? What have I done to suffer like this?

“I do like a woman who can eat while still staying slim,” Graham remarks through a full mouth, gesturing at Zelda’s food. “Though I suppose that’s partly from your… outdoor activities. Well, whatever it is that you do outside.”

Definitely in hell.

Zelda valiantly tries to not grind her molars into dust. “I hike and run and ride horses. And I volunteer with local environmental organizations that do weekly clean-up treks in the national park. I’ve told you all about this before.”

Many times. When my father introduced us at the charity gala that was to benefit one of the organizations I chair. And when he talked my ear off for an hour to convince me to give you a chance. “He’s not a complete douche, Zelda.” Please, dad, he makes John Mayer look like a saint.

“Well thank god for all that, then” Graham chuckles and slurps another oyster.

Zelda barely refrains from stabbing him with one of the many extraneous forks for the hundredth time.

Trying to take her mind off the disgusting spectacle in front of her, Zelda gazes over at Link across the large room. He’s smiling and chatting with some diners while setting down plates with the grace of a pilates instructor.

Would Link help me dispose of a body? I bet he would. He seems like the loyal type. Maybe he’d even take a stab at Graham himself.

For some reason, Link also seems like he’d be good with a sword. Those hips and thighs encased in his tight black work pants seem powerful, able to move in ways both fluid and strong. And Zelda would like to see how he wields a blade, cutting into enemies like Graham. And maybe how Link would use those strong legs to sheathe that sword and thrust hard and true into–

The cracking and slurping of lobster breaks Zelda out of her horny fog.

But like all things, Zelda’s personal hell ends with Graham finishing his food and heading off to the restrooms.

Zelda lets her head fall into her hands. Just for a moment. The darkness envelops her, giving her a temporary respite. She’s so close to being done she can taste freedom. And it tastes even better than the admittedly fantastic gnocchi.

“Erm, I know it’s not my place to ask, but are you doing okay?”

Zelda raises her head and meets Link’s worried gaze. She hadn’t even heard him walk over.

“I’m breaking up with him,” she tells Link, needing to put his mind at ease as much as her own. “That is the only reason I’m here. This is explicitly a breakup lunch.”

Link’s entire posture changes, slumping in relief. “Oh thank god. I was worried about you.”

“I’m alright, but I appreciate the concern. He is the worst.” Zelda shudders. “I would have never even given him a chance if my father hadn’t been so insistent on setting us up. All that old money nonsense. I’m planning on kicking off my heels and running through the golf course to the beach after this. To celebrate my freedom, you know.”

The corners of Link’s mouth turn up into a sweet, soft smile. “That sounds lovely. You deserve that.”

Now or never, Zelda. He’s sweet, attractive, caring, and likes the outdoors. Don’t be a coward.

Mustering up her courage, Zelda offers, “You’re welcome to join me on the beach. After you’re done with work. If you’d like. My name is Zelda, by the way.”

The grin that breaks Link’s face reminds Zelda of the equinox sunrises she’s hiked to summits for. And it’s just as rewarding.

“I would really like that, Zelda. I would be honored to celebrate your freedom with you.”

Link shuffles a bit and wrings his hands together before continuing, “And um, well, next time you’re in the park during the week, you can stop by my station. I can show you around. Maybe take you on a guided hike and show you all the secret bio nerd stuff. You know, if you want to.”

“I’d love that. Meet you by the ocean after this?”

“I’m off at 3.”

“Perfect! 

“I guess I’ll sea you there,” Link says with a lopsided smile.

It’s a completely terrible pun, but Zelda cackles in laughter, tears beading at her eyes. Graham had always scoffed at the silly dad jokes she found hilarious, decrying them as “low-brow.” She’s liking Link more and more every minute.

Zelda replies, “Water we waiting for?” to Link’s absolute delight. When they finish giggling like teenagers, she adds, “And I’ll take the check now, please and thank you. I want this lunch to be over as soon as possible.”

“On it,” Link says with a wink and then speed walks to the back of the room.

1000%.

After a moment, Graham plods his way to the table and flops down in his chair. Zelda’s never been so happy to see him.

Almost done. Almost done and then I can be outside with a new friend who is extremely nice and cute and funny and nerdy and who might be interested in me. Just break up with him. It’s the perfect time. Do it.

Zelda steeples her fingers and sucks in a deep breath.

“Graham, I think there’s something we should talk about.”

“So do I. I’ll go first.”

Graham snaps his fingers and a waiter who is conspicuously not Link walks over and hands them two glasses of champagne.

Zelda’s face draws up in confusion. “Um, I didn’t want any champagne. I just asked for the check.”

“I think you’ll want this champagne,” Graham says with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

Zelda looks down. There’s a ring in the champagne.

No.

Her eyes snap up from the gaudy, gigantic ring to Graham kneeling and the entire restaurant staring expectantly at them. Her heart stops. Her breath stops. The world stops.

No no no.

From across the room, Link looks on with sheer horror. The check falls from his hand onto the floor with a dull slap.

No, this cannot be happening. They’ve only been dating for a month. She’s about to break up with him. She just asked Link out! And he subsequently asked her out! This can’t be real.

No no no no no–

Graham puts on his smarmiest smile and asks, “Zelda Hyrule, will you do me the honor of being my–”

Hoping that it will help her get through this absolute nightmare, Zelda takes the biggest gulp of champagne she can. But when she swallows, it doesn’t go down.

The ring, Zelda realizes as she starts to choke. The motherfucking ring.

Her fingers scrabble at her throat as panic sets in.

“What’s going on?” Graham asks, grimacing. “Are you being dramatic again? Come on, Zelda, this is my moment. Our moment.”

Oh my god, I’m not going to survive this lunch! Zelda realizes as her vision fades and her lungs burn. This pompous douchebag managed to kill me. I can’t believe this is how I’m dying– it’s not even something noble and self-sacrificing. I’m choking on an ostentatious engagement ring from the man I’m trying to break up with. This death is just insulting.

Something crashes across the room and Link shouts, “Shut up, she’s choking! You, call 911!”

“Oh, erm,” Graham stutters before giving the weakest punch to Zelda’s stomach in a Heimlich attempt that cannot even be dubbed “half-assed” because it is an insult to half-assed things everywhere. “Did that help?”

Zelda gurgles and fights for air. But she wishes against hope that she could get her voice back enough to tell Graham, “No.”

No, it didn’t help, you absolute moron. 

No, I don’t want to date you anymore. 

No, your shorts aren’t “Nantucket Red,” they’re fucking salmon. 

No, I do not want to marry you!

The last thing Zelda hears before everything goes black is Link yelling, “Move!” and the last thing she feels is Graham being shoved away from her. Good.

Then everything is dark and quiet and peaceful.

When Zelda opens her eyes again, it’s to Link’s worried face very close to hers and a sharp ache in her chest.

Wow, was I really that good to be sent here, her muddled brain thinks before she jack-knifes up and vomits the ring and her lunch right onto Graham’s pressed khakis.

Graham screams and scuttles away.

“This is dry-clean only!”

A little bit gets on Link’s shoe, but he holds her hair back and doesn’t seem to care.

Applause fills the restaurant as it becomes clear that all the wealthy country club members are not going to have to watch a young woman choke to death during their Saturday lunch in what can only be properly described as the worst proposal of all time.

Zelda’s throat burns and her chest aches as she takes in ragged pants of air, but she’s alive and still breathing. And Link saved her.

In the aftermath, everything hits Zelda at once. The fact that the asshole her father had pressured her into dating had been rude to a waiter was humiliating enough. The weight of everyone constantly questioning her choices, constantly thinking she’s strange and weird for her interests, not feminine enough for doing what she loves and pursuing STEM and the outdoors, having to always push back against expectations and rude douches like Graham. 

And now the absolute embarrassment of a public proposal she would have to turn down now since this was supposed to be a break-up lunch!

Zelda’s never been much a crier, but tears bubble up, unwilling to stay put like she wants. She blames it on the fact that she may have technically died before Link brought her back with CPR.

Fat tears stream down her face and she turns into Link, wrapping her arms around him and clutching him like a short, nicely muscled teddy bear. He smells nice, a small part of her brain catalogues.

Link holds her while she cries onto his shirt, stroking her hair and trying his best to soothe her. “Shh, just breathe, the paramedics are on their way and you’re okay. You’re okay.”

She sobs, finally letting out all of the stress and anger and shame that she’d been weighed down with. When she stops crying long enough, Link grabs a napkin from a helpful patron and cleans her face off. Thankfully, the worst of it got on Graham and they were spared. Small miracles.

“Goddammit, this sweater is cashmere, too!” Graham yells from a distance. “Congratulations, Zelda, you’ve managed to ruin everything!”

“Don’t listen to him,” Link says as he rubs her back. “He’s a complete prick with a personality like smashed arse who even the ocean wouldn’t wave to.”

Zelda chokes again at Link’s rather… descriptive insult. Descriptive and accurate.

Link wipes the tears from under her eyes and asks, “Here, do you mind if I take you outside to wait for the medics? So that you won’t have an audience anymore?”

“Yes, please.”

Without any effort, Link grabs Zelda under the knees and shoulders and picks her up off the ground.

As they pass a still sputtering Graham desperately wiping at his clothes with a napkin, Zelda gives him a glare that rivals Link’s.

“That was a, ‘No,’ in case you didn’t realize,” she tells Graham before they walk away. 

His mouth opens and closes like a dumb fish. A dumb fish with a popped collar.

The weight that had been holding Zelda down lifts. She’s free. She’s alive and she’s free and she told him “no” unambiguously. She’ll never have to watch golf or pretend to care about cyber currency or hear his rants about luxury cars or see him eat lobster ever again. 

She’s free.

“Good riddance,” Link mutters under his breath.

Another waiter holds open the door for them so that Link can carry her through. Fresh, crisp air hits her skin and lungs and Zelda can breathe again.

As the paramedics arrive and check her over, Link doesn’t leave her side.

“You are the best person ever,” Zelda tells him and squeezes his hand in hers while they sit on the back of the ambulance. “You saved my life from an awful proposal that tried to kill me. And the worst part is that I didn’t even get to give you a great tip for all that you suffered!”

Link has the audacity to laugh so hard he snorts.

“It’s okay. I don’t need any tips. I’m just happy you’re safe.”

“Actually, I’ll have my father make Graham give you a very, very generous tip. Poetic justice.” Zelda rests her head on Link’s shoulder and gazes up at him. “Do you have to go back to work now?”

“No, my shift’s over early.” Link glances over to a woman wearing a blazer who gives him a nod and thumbs up. “The owner approves. Conveniently.”

“Well, saving someone’s life should get you off work early. Good publicity, right?”

“Exactly. Do you want to go see the ocean with me? I can carry you if you’re too tired to walk.”

Zelda shakes her head. “No, I’m feeling better. Holding my hand should be sufficient.”

“I am more than happy to help,” Link replies as he helps her down off the ambulance and walks hand-in-hand with her across the sprawling green of the golf course.

Zelda kicks her heels off and takes in a great gulp of fresh air. She leaves them behind on the grass.

As they reach the ocean and dip their toes in, Zelda squeezes his hand. Cool water washes over them, lapping against their bare feet as Zelda recalls Link’s perfectly placed insult. She has a feeling that she’s going to hear a lot more jokes and bad puns from him in the future. And she can’t wait.

With a grin, she tells Link, “You know, I’m happy I came to lunch here today.”

[dreamsongsims]

Mullner Household at SFS or TS3 Exchange

Alex’s Hair Clara’s Hair

Alex at SDV

LTW: Superstar Athlete

Career: Professional Sports

Traits: Ambitious, Athletic, Dog Person, Excitable, Loves the Heat

Skills: Athletic, Cooking, Handiness

Favorites: Latin, Grilled Salmon, Irish Green

Zodiac: Cancer

Inventory: Gravestone of Clara Mullner (spoiler below the cut), football, flying disc

Stardew Valley Sims | Mullners | George | Evelyn | Dusty | Clara

Clara Mullner is Alex’s mother and George and Evelyn’s daughter. While nothing more than a memory in SDV, her creation in TS3 was necessary to establish the proper family ties between Alex and his grandparents. I turned her into a ghost (she became ill after eating a bad jellybean), and her gravestone is available in Alex’s inventory. I assume she was a young adult when she died, as Alex was probably 6-8 years old at the time. Clara will have her own post eventually.

[bywandandsword]

I was reading more about fili (ancient Irish poets) and I came across an article about Imbas Forosnai. As Cormac's glossary has it, the fili in question would chew the "red flesh of a pig, or a dog, or a cat" then puts it on their flagstone, chants over it, then passes out for until they get the answer to their question or attained imbas. According to this article, the "red flesh" is a euphemism for fly agaric (the red mushroom with white spots), which is a known hallucinogen. This person also thinks that other euphemisms were used as well, namely the spotted salmon

And of course that makes me think not only of Finn's story of gaining inspiration from just a concentrated drop of the Salmon of Knowledge, but also of the story of how Taliesin accuared his wisdom. It makes me think that maybe these brews that people are making in the mythology are just superpowered versions of brews that the fili were making regularly? It also bears a great deal of similarity to rituals held in many other cultures that involve hallucinogens, like peyote, soma (which is also believed to have a mushroom base), and maikua.

[nancypullen]

FRIDAY!

Yippee! We’ve made it to the end of another week!  That doesn’t really mean the same thing to me that it used to, but Fridays still make me happy.  Weekends are when fun stuff happens, right?  For us that means old people fun like grilling a week’s worth of chicken breasts and staying up to watch Saturday Night Live.  That’s right, we walk on the wild side.  Pre-covid we’d probably catch a matinee or even enjoy a meal out, now it’s takeout and an occasional drive-in movie.  I’m really, really okay with that.  Anywayyyy, I ran out to do my Saturday grocery shopping because our local forecasters uttered the word *s*n*o*w*.  We’re supposed to get a couple of inches tonight and I know the fine folks of Wilson County tend to clear the shelves before the flakes fly.  There’d be nothing left by Saturday. I ran to Kroger this morning and the parking lot was full.  I popped in and loaded up on bananas, apples, blueberries, broccoli, zucchini, avocados, romaine, peppers, salmon, chicken, ground turkey, eggs, and the three things we can’t live without - Diet Coke, chocolate, and cat food.  Let the blizzard rage.  I have food, books, and plenty of clay for making earrings and doodads.  I hope I wake up to a blanket of white.

In a sign that time has become a blur I noticed that my local Kroger was pushing green cookies, green cakes, green balloons, green carnations, green, green, green. Oops, forgot that St. Patrick’s Day is coming up. We don’t normally do anything special. I’d love to make a big pot of corned beef, cabbage, and potatoes but the mister is not a fan.  Interesting since he’s the one with the Irish heritage and I don’t have a drop.  My DNA proved it.

See that island left in the dark?  That’s Ireland and I’ve got no claim to it. You’d think that with that breakdown of my DNA  I’d have had a shot at being tall and blonde.  Nope, I’m a shrimp and my blonde comes from a bottle now.   I forgot to make a Goodwill drop off when I ran to the grocery store.  That’s my pattern. I bag or box it here at home and it sits in the middle of a room for a few days.  Then I move it to the back of the car and drive it around for a while. Eventually I remember to stop at Goodwill and unload it.  I’m pretty sure it drives Mickey bonkers but his slash and burn method makes me nervous, so we’re even.  State Farm is putting a new roof on the house next week so that will make it tastier to potential buyers.  Shortly after that we’ll be prepared to list and then things get really terrifying.  We don’t have a home on the other end yet.  We’ve got a Zoom call scheduled on Sunday with a realtor in Maryland - he’ll walk us through the procedure for making an offer on a home up there while we wait to close down here.  I’m not picky, but I am asking for certain things - no basement laundry, a window over the kitchen sink, and a sweet, safe little neighborhood.  If I could have everything I want it would include a walk-in closet in the master bedroom (that’s now politically incorrect, we’re supposed to say primary bedroom), a pantry in the kitchen, a two-car garage, and public water and sewer.  I don’t think that’s a ridiculous list but apparently we’re hunting unicorns.  It doesn’t have to be a showplace, I can make it pretty.  In a perfect world I’d move across the street from the grandgirl and her parents and they’d never have to worry about a thing.  She’d come to my house after school, if they worked late or got caught in traffic she’d just have dinner with Grancy and Grandpa, We’d have so. much. fun.  Given the limited inventory we’re trying to be happy if we can just find a home within an hour of them.  It’s so frustrating!  I keep telling myself that it will all work out, but there’s a part of my brain telling me we’re foolish to give up the security here for the unknown there.  Still, we want out of the south and there’s nothing more important to us than family.  Onward, onward.  Time for a new chapter. I think I’ll crank up the oven and make some earrings for my sister, she’s such a happy recipient of my wonky creations.  I’ve been on a gingham kick for spring.

And earlier today I asked her opinion on these...

I hesitated to post that picture here for a number of reasons.  First, my sagging cheeks.  Then the zits on my cheek from trying a sample of a new moisturizer (why do I tempt fate?).  My profile is not flattering.  Then I thought...who cares?  Aren’t we tired of feeling bad about ourselves yet?  We’re all flawed and we’re all aging.  Society is just especially cruel to aging women.   Men are allowed to age, no one cares.  The craggier the better, their crow’s feet and creases give them character.  When was the last time you looked at a man’s neck and noticed the wrinkles?  But women are marketed every potion and procedure in the world to stave off the natural changes of time.  Men go bald, get bellies, liver spots, and grow beards to cover their jowls.  We’re supposed to spend and spend and work at staying forever young.  I refuse!  Oh, I’m not giving up my lipstick, but I refuse to feel bad about LIVING in the face I’ve been given.  Some of that is DNA and some of that is life choices.  I like the sun and it shows.  I’ve put some miles on that face.  It’s lived from an Inuit village in the arctic to steamy south Florida.  That face has expressed joy and sorrow and lived to tell the tales.  I’m not sorry that I’ve lived to be 58 and a grandmother, why does society expect me to feel anything but happy about that?  Won’t you join me in dismissing every ad targeting women that makes us feel insecure about what is natural?  Take care of yourself, stay healthy, and embrace everything that is wonderful about you.  Forget the rest.  You don’t owe the world an unlined face, but your talents and gifts will surely be appreciated. Let’s work on loving ourselves exactly as we are. Hmm. I didn’t come here to rant about that.  You probably didn’t come here to read it either.  Stepping off my soapbox now. If you need me I’ll be at my desk rolling clay and waiting for the snow to fly.  If I haven’t mentioned it lately, you’re fabulous. Stay safe, stay well, be kind to yourself. XOXO, Nancy

[stephanieromanoff]

Fun facts about Lena Luthor

(Facts from wiki fandom)

Her full name is Lena Kieran Luthor.

She was born on October 24, 1993.

Katie Mcgrath (who plays Lena) was actually born in 1983, ten years older than her character.

She’s a scorpio.

At the start of season 2, she’s 23 years old.

Lena hates flying, despite having a pilot’s license.

She takes her coffee black.

She hates salmon.

She likes scotch, but deslikes tequila.

She’s 5’5” tall (1,65 m).

Lena loves Big Belly Burger.

Her favorite movie is Titanic.

Some of her abilities are: genius-level intellect, master biologist, master chemist, master investigator, master scientist, expert pilot, computer specialist, skilled hand-to-hand combatant, expert medic.

She’s been implied being a Irish descent, like Katie McGrath.

[scotianostra]

April 16th 1746 saw the Battle of Culloden.

Today I wont so much be covering the battle itself as I have in previous years, I will post a bit about how Culloden became the site of the battle and the aftermath. By the aftermath, again I wont be treading over ground covered and the treatment of Highlanders, but will instead follow what was left of the Jacobite army and what they did in the days, weeks and indeed months after the battle.

Much has been said about the site of the battle and the Prince has been criticised for "choosing" the moor.

Three sites were scouted in the 48 hours leading up to the battle, they knew Cumberland's army was coming, their had been skirmishes in the week or so before this day, things were coming to a head.

The first site as at Dalcross Castle, which John Sullivan, the Irish adjutant and quartermaster general, rejected, because the distance across the ravine would have been too small to protect the Jacobite army from British musket fire from the other side.

The second was on the south side of the Nairn, chosen by Lord George Murray. This was poor ground, did not protect the road to Inverness and was vulnerable to British mortar fire from the other side of the river. It is clear that this site was a prelude to retreat and the dissolution of the army, because it was not an effective battle site.

The third site was about 1km east of where the battle was eventually fought, and John Sullivan drew up the army there on 15 April. It was on higher and less boggy ground than the final battlefield, and both wings of the army could see each other, which they could not in the next day’s sleet and rain. No one ‘chose’ the site of the battle on Drummossie Moor as a preference: it was the line closest to headquarters at Culloden House which could defend the road to Inverness.

Many of those soldiers who were asleep after the failed night attack on the 15th had retreated to the grounds of Culloden House, and there was little time to form them up as the British Army approached on the morning of the battle.

Some had urged the Prince to fall back into the hills and glens, split into units and launch a guerrilla campaign,  historians can't agree who ruled this out, some say Lord Murray, others Prince Charles, some a mixture of the two, no matter what it never happened, as we all know.

The battle began around mid-day, the 9,000 well-rested Government troops advanced downwind across the Moor towards their exhausted opponents who faced directly into the north-east wind and its accompanying sleet. The Prince’s forces numbered about 6,000 and were in two lines. The left flank of the front line was held by the three regiments of MacDonalds, highly resentful that they were not in their traditional place of honour on the right, held by the Atholl Brigade.

In the centre were some of the best of the Jacobite infantry, veterans of the victories at Prestonpans and Falkirk: Lord Lovat’s Frasers, the MacLeans, Mackintoshes, McLachlans and Chisholms.  Weak in artillery, the Jacobite frontline could see Cumberland’s gunners unlimbering and loading their batteries of cannon. Receiving no order to unleash the fearsome Highland charge, by far their best weapon, they must have known what was coming.

And come it did; Cumberland opened fire with roundshot across the unobstructed moorland. Behind his artillery, the Duke’s own front line consisted of six regular infantry battalions; the Royal Regiment on the right, opposite the MacDonalds, with Barrell’s Regiment on the left, facing the Athollmen. The second line contained six more infantry battalions, with yet three more in a third line alongside two squadrons of light cavalry. Out on his flanks were the feared heavy Dragoons: Cobham’s on the right, Kerr’s on the left. All was ready for the Jacobite charge.

Cumberland’s infantry had been given intensive training on how to deal with the onrushing Highlander, claymore in right hand, targe on his left. Having fired his Brown Bess musket, each man was to use his socketed bayonet to attack the opponent on his right front, trusting that his own comrade to his immediate left would do the same.

This was designed to avoid the parrying effect of the targe and inflict a disabling wound in the first shock of contact.

For a full half-hour the Government artillery thundered on unchallenged, roundshot and then grapeshot hammering into the Prince’s waiting battalions. Still no order to charge came as scores of men went down, thinning the ranks and producing frantic calls from officers and men to be released to the charge. Eventually they went off anyway.

The MacDonalds crashed in to Barrell’s Regiment, overrunning the front line before losing momentum and being shot and bayoneted by the upcoming second rank. Elsewhere the charge was even less successful; depleted by cannon fire and decimated by the rolling volleys of the infantry, Highland courage and dash proved no match for regular infantry discipline. The charge reeled backwards leaving up to a thousand dead in front of and among the Government positions.

Cumberland ordered a general advance and unleashed his cavalry. What had been a battle was now a rout. It had lasted an hour.

Jacobite casualties are estimated at 1,500 dead, with an unknown number of wounded and fugitives bayoneted and shot in the merciless pursuit that followed.Cumberland lost only 59 dead and 250 wounded, the only senior officer to die being Lord Robert Kerr, commander of grenadiers in Barrell’s Regiment and a son of the Marquess of Lothian.

It was over; the military neutralisation of the Highlands was about to begin. The ease in which the Government troops surprised Cumberland, and he surprised further when the Jacobites did not regroup and force another battle, he certainly expected another, but none came, around 1000 gathered the following day at Ruthven ­Barracks, where a written order from Prince Charles told them to “seek their own safety” and disband.  But, for many, surrendering was too dangerous an option.

As time went on, the risks of Jacobites handing themselves in became clear. The mood of the Ruthven meetings was downcast. Many fought on to avoid capture or because the risk of surrendering was high. In June, a number of Jacobites went into Fort William after the British government ­promised six weeks’ immunity. Captain Scott drowned them in a salmon net.

Jacobites engaged in low-level disruption, raiding and ­protection of vulnerable tenantry as well as recruitment to the Irish Brigade and probably Scottish regiments in French service, including Ecossais Royales.

Assassinations of unpopular ­government officers or sympathisers were also recorded. The British government still considered the Jacobite threat to be “major” at this time with around 12,000 to 13,000 soldiers deployed across the entire country – from Berwick and Stranraer to Elgin, Forres, Stonehaven, Inverbervie and Montrose – by the end of August 1746.

As government forces mobilised, significant units of armed Jacobites continued to appear in the field. At the end of April, 120 armed MacGregor men were recorded in Balqhuidder after marching home ‘colours flying and pipes playing’ with the Army unwilling to tackle or pursue Jacobite units that maintained discipline. 

One battalion of Lochiel’s ­regiment was still operational in May – as were 500 men under ­Clanranald. Orkney remained under Jacobite control until late that month and, despite British attacks, four local Jacobite lairds remained successfully hidden

Clans made concerted attempts to resist Cumberland and his men with around a dozen chiefs meeting at Mortlaig in early May. At the meeting... they entered into a bond for their mutual defence and agreed never to lay down their arms, or make a general peace without the consent of the whole,” according to an 1832 account by James Browne.

“By the bond of association, the chiefs agreed...to raise on behalf of the prince and in defence of their country, as many able-bodied armed men as they could on their respective properties.”

Around 600 men gathered later that month across the north and west but the clans “ultimately did not have the time or morale to raise or retain enough men in the field.

Although a unified response failed to materialise, Jacobites remained active across Scotland. Jacobite expresses – the non-stop delivery of letters by horse – continued until August. A British regiment was deployed across Banffshire in the summer of 1746 with insurgents reported in Argyll that September.

Arms were surrendered in the Mearns right into the summer of 1748. British atrocities were carried out against innocent ­victims, but there were plenty of continuing Jacobite threats and remained so for some time, this led to the building of roads and bridges, to make it easier for troops to be deployed into the heart of the country, many still used to this day, these projects and the act of proscription meant the end of the old Highland way of life. 

Many of us have made our pilgrimages to Culloden to pay our respects to those that died that day, and to the commemorations, both on the day, and at the one at midnight the night before, I hope you all take a moment and remember the brave men who fell that day and afterwards............

[art-thropologist]

A Portfolio of Recovery

If you’ve been following my entries, you’ll know that I recently had to go through some medical treatment. I am at a point now where I am willing to share some of the products of the art therapy that went along with that process. With each piece I’ll explain the prompt or the intention behind it and how I interpret the visual cues.

Please note that I will be talking about eating disorder behaviors, body image, and trauma. I use vague terms, but if these are triggering topics, then do not read. If you are in need of help with an ED, NEDA can get you support.

“Timeline” (2019). Color pencil on paper. Prompted.

The only instruction was to create a timeline that represents the development of my body image. Instead of using text I felt more comfortable conveying sentiments through line and color. The horizon line in the center represents the neutral base while rises indicate positive emotions and declines are negative. The timeline is divided into five stages with vertical lines; infancy, lower school, middle school, high school, and college. 

The main colors change as my favorite color changed over the periods, but also reflecting other experiences. I began with blues and yellows as a toddler. Open and wide like a shining sky. I was a happy kid. Who didn’t think themselves invincible back then? I first started having issues with self worth during Elementary school. I was picked on for being ‘dumb’, bullied for being too emotional. Most of the time I was told to ignore the bullies. That doesn’t work. So then I was told not to react. That didn’t work either. It just taught me that I was the one causing issues. I began suppressing displays of emotion. I liked myself, but I figured that I was just always going to be someone else’s punching bag.

Middle school was supposed to be a time of growth. You finally become a teenager. In my case, you have a bat mitzvah and are then an adult to the community. Kids were still relentless in bullying. Add in tween hormones and angst, and you have a powder keg. I hit a growth spurt but I didn’t ‘measure up’ to the other girls. When my parent’s got divorced I blamed myself even though there was nothing I could have done. I felt buried under the pressures of being the perfect daughter as shown with the brown curve. My sister (only 3 years older than me) was my parent; waking me up, getting me to school, taking me to Hebrew school, getting me dinner, etc. Over this period I was forced to become self-sufficient. I had to. I was complimented a few times for being so adult for my age. I latched on to that as a way to build up my self worth. If i couldn’t be pretty, at least I could be mature. I was looking forward to high school as a promised land of new beginnings.

I guess I got what I wanted.

I’m not going into details about what happened. It was a traumatic event. That’s all you need to know. But it left me angry, broken, grieving, and hateful. Once again, I blamed myself even though what happened was in no way my fault. The way I was treated as a result only tore my self worth and body image to shreds. I was ugly. I was at fault. I wasn’t worth caring. I wasn’t good enough. Several years of therapy have let me process a lot of this period in my life. It was the start of my ED behaviors as I tried to make myself worth caring about. Black tainted my experience through a series of deaths. My lowest point was when I realized that I would be the next one if I didn’t get help for my ED.

Hope is purple to me. I began seriously writing in high school (nothing good. Nothing you write in high school is good. You think you’re the next Harper E. Lee or John Green with these big themes that you really don’t understand yet. But it was a way to get some of these big emotions out.) It gave me something to value about myself when I was still belittled as ‘stupid’. When I started college I began to get therapy for anxiety and my ED. Since then I’ve been building myself again. I am stronger. I am a survivor. I do not exist for the approval of others. It sparked a new light, a new fire for me.

“Dance” (2019). Colored pencil on paper. Free draw.

The three overlapping figures represent different dance styles that I’ve done. Red is Hula/Shawl. Green is Irish Step. Blue is Judaic Circle. It all overlaps to me.

“Movement” (2019). Oil pastel on paper. Prompted

Visualizing a group exercise where we were passing items across space. I’m the blue.

“Animals” (2019). Colored pencil and watercolor on paper. Prompted.

Draw three animals. The first is how you think others see you. The second is how you see yourself. The third is who you want to be.

Owl. The wise one. Solitary. Nocturnal. Independent. An omen maybe.

Salmon. Swimming upstream and trying to overcome the currents. Needs others to survive.

Fox. Cunning. Sleek. Adaptive. Wild.

I like the insular style of Tomm Moore and definitely took inspiration here. I wanted all of the animals to be connected in some way, so that style seemed best suited to that.

“Pondshore” (2020). Oil and chalk pastel on paper. Prompted.

What stood out the most during a walk outside?

“Nature walk” (2019). Crayon and oil pastel on paper. Prompted.

How did the nature walk make you feel?

I felt movement from the trees blowing in the wind, the grey sky over head, and my own body.

“How rare and beautiful it is to even exist” (2020). Pencil on paper. Prompted.

Create a mandala.

I pulled on the Tomm Moore style again with all of the components flowing into each other in some way. There are birds flying into the distance, a vine that becomes a raging sea, a woman before a fire, a sun in the sky and a half moon setting. Yes, the title is from Saturn by Sleeping at Last.

“Lyric” (2019). Colored pencil and pencil on paper. Prompted.

What inspires you?

I use sinuous lines of lyrics create my figure. I’m inspired by music and these are songs which have stuck with me.

Blue: “Hello, I've been waiting for you/ I didn't know if you'd recognize my voice/ Cause I've been whispering your name and I've been imagining this day hoping that I’ll say/ Welcome home/ Welcome home. (“Welcome Home” by Joy Williams)

Orange: “Well, I've been deep in this sleeplessness/ I don't know why/ Just can't get away from myself/ When I get back on my feet I'll blow this open wide/ And carry me home in good health” (“Who Do You Love” by Marianas Trench)

Red: “This is gospel for the fallen ones/ Locked away in permanent slumber/ If you love me let me go/ 'Cause these words are knives that often leave scars/ The fear of falling apart” (“This is Gospel” by P!ATD)

Yellow: “How do you write like you're/ Running out of time?/ Write day and night like you're/ Running out of time?/ Like you're running out of time/ Are you running out of time?/ How do you write like tomorrow won't arrive?” (“Non-Stop” from Hamilton)

Purple: “When I die/ I don't want to rest in peace/ I want to dance in joy/ I want to dance in the graveyards/ And while I'm alive/ I don't want to be alone/ Mourning the ones who came before/ I want to dance with them some more/ Let's dance in the graveyards/ Gloria, like some other name/ We kept on calling ya” (“Dance in the Graveyard” by Delta Rae)

“Billowing out a River from My Lungs” (2019). Watercolor, colored pencil, and oil pastel on paper. Free draw.

I’m actually working on a newer version of this. It was just something to explore mediums and a bit of meditative practice.

“Emotions (Sadness, Creativity, Loneliness, Hope, Grief, Sonder)” (2019). Watercolor on paper. Prompted.

Pick six emotions and represent them.

Sadness is dark to me, heavy, and spiraling. It’s a whirlpool that drags you down.

Creativity is spontaneous, bright and orange like flowers. I tried to convey that with different strokes and a golden spark in the corner. 

Loneliness is hard and harsh absence. That feeling of emptiness despite being surrounded by love and compassion.

Hope is green, a path in the forrest that is moving upward, forward.

Grief is red and raw at first and then the longing fades in, dark and deep.

Part 2 is coming soon

[neonsentient]

My Antihero Academia

This is the “Elemental” Team. Instead of having them control an element I rather have them be able to navigate through all terrains (except for Charro, I really wanted a fire user). But the girls are fit for terrestrial, aerial and maritime combat.  

El Charro Negro: Loyal and carefree.

Quirk: Infierno

Likes: Horse riding and playing the guitar. 

Favorite Food/Drink: Cochinita pibil, tres leches cake, mezcal and Coca-Cola

Birthday: November 2 

Preferred Drug: Hallucinogenic mushrooms.

Weapon of Choice: Lasso, charisma, obsidian knife, spurs, rifle (Winchester lever-action repeating rifle)

Car: Ram 1500 Limited 4WD Crew Cab Tungsten (in coal black)

Quote: "Burning is not “my sort of" thing, its my thing y punto. If some pendejos were to steal your fire, believe me, I would burn everything in my way until their culos were nothing but ash.” 

Trivia: 

Charros´s mother tongue is Spanish and he is fluent in English and Nahuatl. 

He is bisexual.

He once burned his town’s church because his cousin was molested by the local priest. His grandmother, a devout catholic, was mad at him for months. 

His horse’s name is Chamuco.

Gaia: Adventurous and romantic.

Quirk: Earthquake

Likes: The outdoors and mixing music. 

Favorite Food/Drink: Venison, tiramisu, tea and limoncello. 

Birthday: April 22

Preferred Drug: Propranolol

Weapon of Choice: Tomahawk, Beretta 92FS, misdirection. 

Car: Lamborghini Aventador (in forest green)

Quote: “Earth is strong, and I can make it tremble at will. What does that say about me?”

Trivia: 

Gaia is partially deaf due to a progressive hearing disorder. She sports hearing aids because of that. 

Gaia’s native languages are English and Italian, and she is fluent in ASL, LIS, Inuit and Mohawk. 

She is heterosexual.

She often has a crush on a different boy each month or so.

Gaia likes to flaunt her body.

Fay: Swift and briskly. 

Quirk: Fairy Wings

Likes: Camping and taking strolls (flying of course)

Favorite Food/Drink: Oatcakes, camp, fruit juice and stout. 

Birthday: June 15/June 24

Preferred Drug: Ephedrine

Weapon of Choice: Nets, bolas, Luger 

Car: She’ll rather fly. But she does have a Suzuki Hayabusa (in orange). 

Quote: “You know us winged fellas, we cannot be kept in cages.” 

Trivia: 

Fay’s first language is English, and is fluent in Irish.

Fay is heterosexual.

She’s been working since she was twelve. (Small jobs like dog walking and tutoring at first) 

Fay is a really fast flyer (as in head-to-head with Hawks)

She has Astraphobia. 

A hero once did something horrible to her when she was fourteen.....

Siren: Alluring and intuitive. 

Quirk: Mermaid

Likes: Singing and collecting seashells

Favorite Food/Drink: (Salmon) Smørrebrød , Karamelrand , mineral water and rum. 

Birthday: March 22

Preferred Drug: Benzodiazepine

Weapon of Choice: Trident, singing voice (allure), flintlock pistol. 

Car: Zenvo ST1 (in navy blue)

Quote:  "I can be the angry wave, or the gentle rain. But always water." 

Trivia: 

Siren’s first language is Danish and she is fluent in English, German and Faroese. 

She is bisexual.

Siren is adopted and does not know anything about her biological parents.

She moved away a lot as a child.

She is HIV positive and is suspected that she contracted it from her biological parents.

[pubz77]

Willie Gunn Probably one of the most popular tube flies of all and for good reason!

[angryharmonytimemachine-blog]

Best Food Restaurant in Dublin

The Ivy Dawson Street

One of the world's most popular cafés, The Ivy, West Street, has invited visitors to make the most of its contemporary food and unmatched assistance for over a century.

The Ivy Collection has crossed the Irish Sea to open its first worldwide brasserie in the core of Dublin at the new milestone working of One Molesworth, Dawson Street.

The Ivy Dawson Street carries a dash of Ivy enchantment to Ireland, offering easy allure and a shifted blend of works of art and privately motivated dishes including Dublin Bay prawns and Dungarvan shellfish.

With 200 seats and a wonderful private lounge area, The Ivy Dawson Street provides food for each event from breakfast and end of the week early lunch, lunch, evening tea, supper, and past, with a delightful bar serving mixed drinks and beverages until late.

Open seven days per week from first light until nightfall, the brasserie is available to all, inviting nearby inhabitants, organizations, and guests the same.

SOLE Seafood & Grill

SOLE Seafood and Grill embodies the genuine taste of Ireland in the core of Dublin, offering a definitive feasting experience for any event. An eatery like no other; the chic inside is supplemented by and a la mode bar and classy nourishment and beverages menu. Appreciate a warm Irish greeting right now where the delight of fine wine and incredible nourishment meets. From shore to soil, provenance is foremost in delivering a menu loaded with show-halting dishes, for example, the Captain's Seafood Platter; a two-level shared pinnacle of barbecued Irish lobster and steamed Roaring water Bay mussels, in addition to new clams, prawns and Howth smoked Irish salmon, presented with Guinness darker soft drink bread and customary fish backups and sauces; or the Sole Meunière; an entire Dover sole, which is filleted at the table for you. Whatever the event, whatever your needs, we can guarantee you a critical night of extravagance and chuckle at SOLE.

La Cucina

Covered up underneath the humming South William Street, in the core of Dublin's innovative quarter you will locate a valid Italian shrouded diamond, arranged in the first kitchens of Powerscourt Townhouse. Home to a natural, outdated style of eating in a personal domain, offering the individuals who eat a really critical Italian experience. The culinary group at La Cucina guarantees that the conventional Italian "Al Forno" cooking procedure is used all through the menu. The huge open wood consuming stove is key to this idea, alongside carefully assembled pasta. Generally, the nourishment is conventional in taste, current in the introduction, exemplary in the system and where conceivable of Irish provenance. Appreciate liberal sharing plates of Prosciutto, Bresaola and Roast Aubergines. Heavenly Crab Linguine or Pulled Organic Pork Pappardelle for the principle can be done off with an Affogato or a Cocktail from the incredible rundown in the agreeable easy chairs upstairs in sister bar Farrier and Draper.

Camden Kitchen

Styled as an 'area bistro' Camden Kitchen is actually that – a café frequented by local people living in the close-by neighborhoods of Dublin 8 however inside simple reach of the downtown area which serves to pull in a more extensive customer base. With its laid back, inviting climate, Camden Kitchen is the ideal spot to fly into for a glass of wine and something to eat on your path home from work yet it is likewise someplace to visit on the off chance that you are extravagant some first-class nosh in the straightforward environment.

The ground floor lounge area is little however comfortable and gave ideal shelter from the tempest that was seething outside on the cold and extremely wet Tuesday night on which I as of late visited. The eatery ordinarily ranges two stories, the two of which are utilized on occupied evenings, however, we presumed that the extreme climate conditions had hindered potential coffee shops so just the ground floor lounge area was being used. Regardless of this, a large portion of the tables was involved and once we peeled off our downpour soaked coats we took a seat at our table close to the open kitchen and quickly requested several remedial Kir Royale mixed drinks made with Prosecco (€8.00).

We ate up cuts of a hard cluster style white bread which were presented with charming petal-molded taps of spread as we settled on what to arrange. An Early Evening menu and a Dinner menu are offered and we immediately chose to make our choices from the last mentioned. Crisp regular produce is to the fore on the brief however considered menu and we were anticipating tasting the nourishment.

1900 Bar & Restaurant

1900 serves current Irish cooking and offers a choice of customary dishes with a cutting edge wind. The café is situated on Harcourt road in Dublin's south downtown area. All steaks served have been matured for at least 28 days, this could in all likelihood be a central factor for steaks darlings. Other menu things that the Chef de Cuisine serves to his burger joints incorporate, a braised pork cheek with cured red cabbage and juice jus or a Trio of Enniscorthy sheep. For those burger joints who make the most of their wine - the extraordinary news is that 1900 has an awesome range.

BANG Restaurant & Bar

Blast Restaurant is one of Dublin's top of the line cafés with 2019 suggestions from The Michelin manage, Wine Spectator, Tripadvisor Certificate of Excellence. At BANG we highly esteem excellent quality nourishment and wine, served in a snappy and loosened up scene. Regardless of whether you go along with us for a night out on the town for two, a unique festival, or a private occasion we work to surpass desires and give an encounter to recollect. We are energetic about utilizing new, regular, Irish Ingredients thus our menu changes day by day. This energy is reflected in our Award Winning Wine List. At BANG we mean to make each experience one to enjoy and recall.

We have 3 special and lovely extraordinary to browse in our excellent downtown area eatery. Regardless of whether it's a casual birthday festivity, one of a kind and private wedding, or increasingly formal corporate occasion we have a space to suit your necessities!

Dani Son Travel provides a taxi service to and from Dublin airport. Pre-Book your airport taxi with us before your important journey. Book us online and call us at 0899728443

[purplesurveys]

570

Ahh, my true passion. Glad there’s this survey around.

Food

I crossed out what I’ve never tried before <- Might as well do this. Thanks for the idea, @justsurveys​! :D Will probs bold and italicize the food I love, bold the ones I’ve simply tried at least once and liked, italicize the ones I’ve tried at least once but don’t like all that much, and strikethrough the food I’ve downright never tried before. Lotsa rules, but food surveys don’t come around often and I’m excited for this one lmao. Let’s go.

Food: Your protein

pork steak lamb chops hamburgers vegan burgers chicken nuggets chicken fingers tuna shrimp salmon oyster

crab lasagna ravioli chicken soup beef jerky slim jims bacon spam buffalo wings sausage ham turkey meat balls

Foods: Your dairy

milk soy milk skim milk raw egg boiled egg sunny-side eggs scrambled eggs cottage cheese cheddar cheese mozzarella cheese swiss cheese bleu cheese cream cheese plain yogurt

Foods: Your vegetables and fruits

mushrooms tomatoes pickles olives carrots raw onion broccoli cauliflower green beans string beans peas black beans celery leek artichoke lima beans bell pepper asparagus spinach seaweed avocado eggplant zucchini corn cucumber squash/pumpkin/yam garlic ginger peanuts almonds sunflower seeds raisins bananas apples pears grapes oranges tangerines peach blueberries raspberries blackberries strawberries lemons (Only as a chaser haha. Tastes great when paired with tequila) pineapples coconuts (I only like it as coconut oil for curry) apricot cherries plums cranberry kiwi watermelon melon pomegranate grapefruit lime guava mango papaya

Foods: Your starch

French fries baked potato scalop potato mashed potato fried rice white rice bagel white bread whole grain bread French bread corn bread sourdough pancakes spaghetti macaroni & cheese oatmeal

Foods: Condiments

wasabi soy sauce cranberry sauce marmalade grape jam strawberry jam ketchup mustard relish mayonnaise whipped cream honey mustard sauce Tabasco salt ranch gravy caramel peanut butter salsa pepper honey maple syrup hummus butterscotch marshmallows icing

Foods: Junk food

Ugh, the most American list on this survey. Watch me strikethrough so many items, ha.

cheetos sour cream and onion chips barbeque chips vinegar chips wheat thins graham crackers saltine crackers cheez-its ritz tortilla chips Lunchables Milano cookies Twinkies popcorn fruit roll ups donuts ice cream sandwiches Poptarts pretzels Girl Scout cookies Oreos Nutter Butter Fig Newtons Jell-O rice crispy treats

Surprisingly not a lot of US stuff. Thanks for being inclusive somehow! Hahaha.

Foods: Cereals

Cocoa Puffs Cocoa Pebbles Fruit Loops Cinnamon Toast Crunch Frosted Flakes Raisin Bran Apple Jacks Corn Flakes Cookie Crisp Cap’n Crunch Lucky Charms Cheerios

Ok, I take back my praise. Tbf, most of the cereals I know are American brands + I don’t eat cereals all that much, so it’s not really this survey’s fault lmao.

Foods: Dessert

brownies muffins cinnamon rolls cheesecake donuts chocolate fondue pudding apple pie pumpkin bread pumpkin pie chocolate chip cookies sugar cookies gingerbread cookies biscotti fortune cookies shortbread cookies oatmeal cookies Angel food cake carrot cake cupcakes fruit cake cream puffs flan custard Meringue sorbet s’mores

Foods: Asian

ramen cup noodle sushi miso soup kimchi teriyaki eggrolls orange chicken

...Seriously? 8 items?

Foods: Fast food and restaurants

McDonald’s Carl’s Jr Taco Bell Panda Express Jack-in-the-box In-n-out Chick-Fil-A La Salsa Dairy Queen Baskin Robbin’s Pizza Hut Papa John’s Roundtable Domino’s Johnny Rocket’s Cho-cho San’s Hot Dog On A Stick Coldstone California Pizza Kitchen Red Robin Ruby Tuesdays Chili’s Wendy’s Burger King Kentucky Fried Chicken Subway Tommy’s The Cheesecake Factory Arby’s Quiznos El Pollo Loco TGIF Applebee’s Wienerschnitzel IHOP Islands White Castle Togo’s Sonic Popeyes Orange Julius Jamba Juice Coffee Bean Starbucks Del Taco Chuck E. Cheese Baja Fresh Macaroni Grill

Foods: Candy

Red Vines M&M’s Snickers Hershey’s kisses Kissables Kit-Kat Nerds Junior Mints Twizzlers Tootsie Rolls Jelly beans Swedish Fish Skittles Starburst 100 grand 3 Musketeers Airheads Almond Joy Baby Bottle Pops Baby Ruth bottle caps Butterfinger Reese’s Cup Fast Break Twix cotton candy chocolate coins Dots Hot Tamales jaw breakers Jolly Ranchers Laffy Taffy Lemonheads lifesavers Mike & Ike Milkduds Milky way Mr. Goodbar Nestle’s crunch Payday pixie sticks pop rocks Push Up pops Runts Smarties Snow Caps Sugardaddy Sweet Tarts Tic-Tacs York Peppermint Patties Warheads

Drinks: Non-alcoholic

Rootbeer Lemonade Orange juice Grape juice Capri Sun Coke Diet Coke Diet Pepsi Pepsi 7up Sprite Mountain Dew Hawaiian Punch Dr. Pepper Apple juice hot cocoa Kool-Aid cappuccinos frappuccinos lattes espresso energy drinks Vanilla Coke Cherry Coke Fanta Arizona Green Tea Squirt Gatorade Iced tea Green tea Chamomile tea White tea Oolong tea Jasmine tea Chai tea Snapple apple cider

Drinks: Alcoholic

Wine Sake Shochu Vodka Bourbon whisky Irish whisky Canadian whisky Bloody Mary Rum Absolut Brandy Scotch Cognac Tequila Gin Wine cooler Smirnoff Marc Sidecar Tonic Pina Colada Martini Alabama Slammer Daiquiri Margarita Cape Cod Flying Horse Kamikaze Screwdriver Rusty Nail Cajun Strawberry Soda Mimosa Champagne Cascade Fosters Sam Adams Budweiser Coors Harpoon Milwaukee’s Bes

[opalescentegg]

‘Princess Tutu’ and the Absent Fish:  An Informal Essay

Anyone familiar with Princess Tutu will recognize and appreciate its masterful melding of diverse fairytale and sometimes mythic elements --- may the record show that I’m no different.  Nevertheless, there is one particular sequence in Ahiru’s heart-shard-hunting quest that never felt quite right: the heart-shard of Curiosity (alternatively, the Desire for Knowledge).  Or, more precisely, it’s the River that always bothered me.

As a one-off magical narrative conceit there’s really nothing wrong with the River having the heart-shard.  Thanks to the episode regarding the heart-shard of Affection, it was already established by that point that non-human(oid) entities could become bearers of pieces of the Prince’s heart.  So the River as heart-shard-holder was at least consistent within the narrative’s internal logic.  What I think I was recognizing through my dissatisfaction with the River, though without even fully comprehending it, was instead a sudden break with what I will term the “chain of motif.”  To put it another way:  every other heart-shard, up until the final five from the town gates, is connected is some way to a recognizable fairytale motif and/or structure; all except for the heart-shard of Curiosity.

For an illustration of heart-shards and their associated motifs, with the specific elements that identify the motifs (where sources give different translations for the known heart-shard emotions I will provide both), I present the following:

1. Disappointment/Bitterness  --  Swan Lake: admittedly, this is mostly in the music and “set design” of the episode which, along with the short-lived (one-sided) dancing rivalry between Anteaterina and Rue, are probably mostly meant to serve as a introducing the central motif of the show.  Additional possible foreshadowing of the thematic conflict between Ahiru/Tutu and Rue/Kraehe later on, though this claim is much more tentative.

2. Loneliness  --  Hansel and Gretel: a house in the woods, a story revolving around food, fear (though here ultimately unfounded) of being eaten

3. Sorrow/Sadness  --  Giselle: taken directly from the ballet, which itself draws from the folklore of willis/vilas that, depending on the tradition, are variously described as ghosts, fairies, nymphs, etc.  I’d also like to point out that the design of the willis fulfills the visual requirements of the White Lady of so many European (and Euro-influenced) countries.

4. Affection  --  Not a single tale-type, but calls upon a conglomeration of magical light folklore, i.e. will-o’-the-wisps (leading people astray, as the Lamp’s riddles led Ahiru not so much astray, but certainly to where the spirit wanted her), the genie in the (oil) lamp, etc.  (I also recall someone once posting about an Andersen tale in which an old street lamp reminisces on all the things it’s seen in its life, much like the Lamp-spirit.  However, while a strong argument can certainly be made for this story being the inspiration for the Lamp, it’s a pretty obscure one from HCA’s repertoire, so I believe the strength of the lamp motif comes mostly from the examples I have highlighted.)

5. Fear  --  Sleeping Beauty: for obvious reasons.  (There are also shades of the Grimms’ “The Story of the Youth Who Went Forth to Learn What Fear Was,” but that’s a real stretch to fully justify, even for me.)

6. Curiosity/Desire for Knowledge  -- ??????

7. Devotion  -- “The Red Shoes,” Andersen: since the magical black pointe shoes Rue slips into seem to have a similar unsettling degree of autonomy to Andersen’s eponymous footwear.  The fact that they cause a transformation that slashes at Rue with thorny vines is also a nearly sadistic inversion (intentional or not, who can say?) of the Anderson story, wherein the sinful girl is at last relieved of her suffering when an angel, carrying a branch blooming with roses, finally grants her mercy and takes her up to Heaven.   I can also see possible shades of Pygmalion in Malen’s obsession with drawing Rue, though her fixation may be argued as serving more to highlight the themes of lack of control and destructive self-sacrifice implicit in the HCA tale, which I still see as the overriding motif here.

8. Regret  --  Cinderella: the episode musical motif, plus the element of the “ball,” or at least a gathering of multiple people (and crow demons?) in a single location.  Charon even plays the part of, first, the “step-parent” who refuses to let his ward attend that event, but eventually transitions into the role “fairy godmother” who furnishes the ward with the physical necessities he needs to go out and do what he wants.  (Amusingly, this makes Ahiru either a bait-and-switch/red herring Cinderella, OR makes her and Fakir a kind of composite Cinderella, each one fulfilling different aspects of the motif -- possible foreshadowing for later partnership, courage described as “two hearts as one,” etc.)

9. Love  --  The title of the episode introducing this heart-shard is “La Sylphide,” though it doesn’t have much in common with the eponymous ballet.  What it does have is the first very recognizable instance of full-on witchcraft in the show, which is undeniably a strong and instantly identifiable fairytale element.  The curse Rue places on this shard also positions her as the “false bride,” from such tales where one woman either kills, curses, or brings low and supplants a “true bride” in order to take that woman’s lover for herself.

10. Pride  --  The Flying Dutchman: In which a man is punished for his sins usually implied, and sometimes outright stated, to be a slight against God performed in a bout of hubris; and cursed to wander and/or continue their mortal duties without rest for all eternity.  Whether they were cursed with immortality or simply exist as spirits unable to enter Heaven or Hell varies between tellings, but the framework is essentially the same.  (This is almost certainly a later variant of a story type I would prefer not to call by name, but involves “Wandering”; though since that protagonist is always cursed with immortality and never becomes a spirit, it’s a tale-type that is at best tangentially related to the motif I’ve chosen anyway.)  

11. Hope -- Swan Lake; The Little Mermaid; The Ugly Duckling; etc.: for obvious reasons again.

Fairy tales and folklore rely heavily on patterns.  In adopting and adapting these stories to craft its own narrative, PT also inherits those formulas.  But the heart-shard of Curiosity does not fit the pattern --- in fact, it seems not to have parallels with any recognizable tale pattern at all.

What is particularly strange is the presence in the episode of many of the building blocks of a very famous folklore motif, and one made all the more conspicuous by its absence from the narrative.  That is: the motif of the ring in the fish.

As far as age is concerned this motif goes back a long way, along one of two variant branches.  One: the ring that is lost, despaired of, and miraculously returned to great joy (and often used as a token of recognition).  Two: the ring that is the catalyst, lynchpin, etc. of some undesirable future event, which the owner tries to throw away in an attempt to dodge destiny and which inevitably comes back to him, the ring here being a tangible reminder of the inescapability of fate.

Of these variants the first is by far the most common.  Arguably the most internationally famous tales of this variant is that of Solomon’s ring, which provides the basic structure many later tales of the branch: King Solomon’s (magic) signet ring was stolen by a demon and cast into the ocean, whereupon it was swallowed by a fish.  Years later, a fisherman caught a fish which was then cooked and served to Solomon, who cut it open to find his ring in its belly.  (The ring here also acts as an indisputable identifier of the true Solomon, who had been reduced to a pauper by the aforementioned demon after losing his ring, since the demon could shapeshift and had assumed the king’s form.  The retrieval of the ring restored Solomon to his true form, allowed him to vanquish the demon, and retake his rightful place as king.  Many ring-in-fish stories conclude with the ring acting as absolute proof of a character’s identity, often in a “recognition” or “reveal” scene.)

 In contrast to this story is that of Polycrates and his ring.  On the advice (and possibly prophecy) of the king of Egypt, Polycrates the tyrant of Samos is told to cast away that possession which he values post, lest his overabundance of success raise the ire of the gods and cause them strike him down.  Polycrates attempted to do so, casting into the sea his prized emerald ring, which caused him much grief.  However, not long after a fisherman brought a fish as tribute to the tyrant; when Polycrates had it gutted his ring was found in its belly, proof that he could not escape his disastrous fate (indeed, he was eventually overthrown and assassinated, possibly by being impaled and his corpse then crucified).

The object cast into the water (typically a piece of jewelry) varies depending on a story: a ring, a necklace, a bracelet, and anklet, etc., though I think the particular emphasis on encircling jewelry is an important detail.  Sometimes the object is simply a gemstone --- also important in this discussion, given the curiously jewel-like appearance of the heart-shards.  

In any case, the basic plot of “[thing] in water  -  [thing] in fish  -  capture of fish  -  [thing] back in hand” (or, even more simplistically: a valuable object lost in water and found later in an unexpected place), is found in sources ranging from Sanskrit dramas to Irish mythology.  Even Hans Christian Andersen famously refurbished it in his “Steadfast Tin Soldier.”  And speaking of Irish mythology, the Fenian cycle famously includes a tale about culture hero Fionn mac Cumhaill and the Salmon of Knowledge.  

(For the uninitiated:  A salmon ate nine hazelnuts that fell into the Well of Wisdom, gaining all the world’s knowledge, and the first person to eat of its flesh would likewise gain that knowledge.  The poet Finegas/Finn Eces, to whom Fionn was then a servant, caught the fish after many years and told Fionn to cook it while he attended to other matters, but not to eat it.  Fionn (surprisingly) followed this directive, until he poked at the fish to check its doneness and burned his finger in the hot fat --- a finger which he immediately stuck into his mouth to soothe, only to thereby ingest the drop of the salmon’s fat and gain the knowledge contained therein.  Upon learning of this, Finegas gave Fionn the rest of the fish to eat, and Fionn gained all the world’s knowledge.)

The motif of a fish associated with great knowledge lends itself well as a base element for a hypothetical holder of the heart-shard of Curiosity, especially when combined with that of the ring in the fish/returning ring.  The latter motif is essentially part of the episode anyway.  After all, there’s a clear instance of jewelry being cast into water --- when Ahiru throws her pendant (an encircling necklace) into the River so that she’ll no longer have to act as Princess Tutu and bring pain to Mytho.  While her necklace is never miraculously returned to her, she nevertheless recovers it, and so fulfills the bare-bones conditions of the tale type.  

The fact that this outcome was exactly what Drosselmeyer wanted would have paralleled the theme of inescapable fate we find in the story of Polycrates’ ring.  In doing so, it would have raised the stakes of one of PT’s central conflicts (do these people even have free will, and if they do can they exercise it successfully to escape tragedy?), making the push and pull that much more dynamic and the tension even more taut.  Because the returned ring motif would have (seemingly) implied an early answer:  No.  The “ring” always returns, and the fate it symbolizes is therefore set in stone.  It’s a pattern we’re all familiar with, even if our recognition of it isn’t always conscious.  But therein lies the problem.  For seemingly no reason, in this episode PT decides to disrupt the pattern.

These are the fairy tale element building blocks we have to work with in the episode:

Water

Something lost (two somethings, in this case: the necklace and the heart-shard; one is lost purposefully in the water, the other by happenstance)

The return of things lost

Later on (continuing into a couple of the following episodes), we are even given:

A recognition scene, brought about by the thing lost in the water

The heart-shard, once recovered and then stolen by Kraehe, leads to Rue’s eventual “recognition” of herself as Kraehe.  It keeps asking her who she is and why she wears black feathers, forcing her into a psychological conflict lasting two episodes.  Unlike a returned ring the heart-shard is not itself hard proof of her identity, but it nonetheless forces the question of identity to the forefront of Rue’s consciousness from the depths of her denial --- it is the catalyst of revelation, if not its direct agent.

(This isn’t even touching on Ahiru’s pendant becoming the element by which Fakir later identifies her as Princess Tutu, and which was also retrieved from the water.)

But, curiously, no fish to be found anywhere.  Very odd, considering that the fish is most often the narrative element that ties all the others together.  It’s the device that keeps the plot from stopping dead after the valuable “something” is lost.  

The closest we get is, well, Ahiru herself.  She is the one who retrieves her necklace from the River, after all.  One could say it’s also when she’s at her most fish-like, since it’s one of the few times we see her fully submerged in water.  But I find this an unsatisfying answer for the absence of the fish.  If nothing else, it lacks the gestative image of a shining ring (or necklace or jewel) sitting quietly in the cold of a piscine belly, generating all sorts of connotations relating to rebirth, fertility, protection, and so on.  While not strictly necessary to the function of a returning ring story, the image nevertheless strikes me as wonderfully evocative and symbolic, which may well account for so many returning ring tales coming down to us as ring-in-fish tales.  

No aquatic creature of any type is part of the encounter with the heart-shard of Curiosity.  (Unless we again count Ahiru, though her being in her mostly-human Tutu aspect --- the one most removed from her aquatic duck form --- strains this interpretation past the point of credulity in my opinion.)  Perhaps the most perplexing thing about this heart-shard is how the River itself is what holds it.  Not even a personification of the River, i.e. a nereid, nymph, kelpie, undine, rusalka, or a few dozen other types of aquatic folklore creatures.  Other aquatic animals were eschewed as well, though if the writers didn’t want to use a fish is would have still been a good opportunity to include a frog, already associated with retrieving golden balls from wells (speaking of valuable round things lost in the water).  And as far as I know, there just aren’t that many stories which feature sentient, non-anthropomorphized bodies of water; the element is obscure at best if it exists at all, certainly isn’t part of any recognizable tale types.  It does not fit the pattern presented by the other narrative building blocks.

It’s a conundrum I can’t quite parse.  If the writers were already including so many of the elements of a common and well-known tale type, why the glaring omission of the element second in importance only to the lost object itself?  The truth is, I don’t have any good answers.

I mean, I can still theorize of course.  For example, it’s entirely possible that the heart-shard was swallowed and held by an ordinary fish at some point (the show establishes that regular, non-anthropomorphic animals live in the town as well), but then the fish simply died and the heart-shard then reverted to the River.  The only problem with this theory is that there is absolutely nothing within the text of the show to support it, and in no way impacts the story we see play out in the show.

And so, what are we left with?  There’s a hole in the story structure with nothing to fill it; a fish story that, like all those tall tales that inspired the idiom, never produces a fish.  But perhaps that, itself, is the best conclusion we can draw from this incomplete tale; the definition of the colloquial “fish story”: a great big lie.  Whether as intentional foreshadowing or just a glitch of human error, by omitting the fish the show writers tipped their hand.  If a ring-in-fish story can so conspicuously become just a variety of “fish story,” then the credibility of all the fairytale structures we see in the show must be called into question.  If the fish is missing from its own tale type, what else might be missing?  If essential elements are missing from certain established story structures, how are those stories still progressing beyond their natural lifespan?  If fairytale plots, with all their adherence to patterns and formulas, are the “truth” of this reality, what might it mean when the pattern is so obviously disrupted?

If Drosselmeyer meant to trap a town in a fairytale for all eternity, he overestimated the sturdiness of traditionally oral story structures.  The tales they produce are narrative bricolage, held together with the spit and chewing gum of predictable conventions and the skill of the storyteller.  Lose one key element, and unless you can convincingly slot another in post haste the entire fabric of the story will unravel in your hands.  Drosselmeyer cast his Story’s net wide and strong, but I suspect even that turned out to be subject to degradation and decomposition.  Holes were inevitable.  This one was just big enough for a single fish to slip through, and with it the first hint about the truth of the Story, carried like a ring in its belly.