#Im jaebum

[multifanhoe99]

Kinktober Day 3- Lingerie

This is gonna be self-indulgent as hell and I am not sorry but also I hope you enjoy it!

Pairing: non-idol!JB x afab!Reader

Warnings: Pet names (Daddy, Princess, Baby), mentions of panty stealing, mentions of masturbation, oral (fem. receiving), PIV intercourse, creampie (fem. receiving), no condom (be safe out there y'all), spanking, hair pulling

=Please let me know if I missed any.=

PROMPT LIST

MASTERLIST

~18+ MDNI ~

It was not often that you wanted to buy fancy things. Even less often the fancy stuff you happen to buy turns out to be something sexy to wear for your husband. This time you couldn't help it. One day in your boredom you decided to do some online shopping and found a gorgeous lacey emerald green set that you knew would look amazing against your skin tone. Even better it was on sale! One night's bored purchase is another night's fun. Honestly, you had almost completely forgotten you bought it until it came in the mail today. It was a pleasant surprise, a gift from your past self and you couldn't help but be thrilled. Just then you got another idea. You were going to make an event of it. You had the day off to relax anyway why not make it worthwhile. With that determination in mind, you went to take a shower to get ready for what you had planned. After your shower, you applied some light makeup and fixed your hair into neat french braids that finished off as low pigtails. He liked your hair like that for very obvious reasons. Then you put on the new lingerie set you bought. On top of it, you put on the dress you know he loves seeing you in the most. It's a long red sundress with flowers on it and a slit that goes up the middle rather than down the side. Once you were all dolled up and ready you decided to head to the kitchen to fix up his favorite meal and to set the table like they would in a restaurant.

When you were finally done you sent a quick text to your husband, -I have a surprise for you when you get home! I hope you like it I love you. See you soon!- You knew he should be on his way home by now and the notification would come up on the dash screen of his car. A few minutes later you get his reply, - I can't wait! I am almost home. I love you too!- It was exciting waiting in anticipation for him to come home. Not even five minutes later while you were putting the finishing touches on the meal you heard the front door open and close. You went out to greet him, "Hello my love how was work?"

"Ah, you know same old-," he pauses when he finally looks up from taking off his shoes to switch to his house slippers, "Wow, what's the special occasion that my beautiful wife feels the need to make my knees weak."

"There is no special occasion I just felt like pampering my handsome husband because he's been working extra hard lately," you replied moving closer to give him a kiss. He instantly returned the kiss and placed his hands on your hips. Before the kiss could get any more heated you pulled away, "Dinner is ready in the kitchen. I made your favorite."

"Have I ever told you that I love you," he asks following you into the kitchen/dining room.

"Only every single day Jae," you respond with a giggle at his affection. No matter how long you two have been together Im Jaebum gives you butterflies like it's still the very first date. Upon seeing the spread you had laid out on the table he came up to hug you from behind and whispered in your ear, "So you did all of this just because I have been working extra hard? I feel like you are planning something, Princess."

"What I can't just want to do something nice for you," you ask trying not to give your true intentions away.

"Okay, I will believe you for now. Let's eat then," he says giving you one more kiss on the head before going to sit down. You both enjoy your meal together and he helps you clean up. When everything was cleaned and put away you went up to JB and wrapped your arms around his neck. He placed his hands back on your hips. You lean closer to whisper in his ear again, "There is more to your surprise. Join me in the bedroom will you?"

"See I knew you were up to something," he says with a smile but follows you to the bedroom anyway. You sit him down on the edge of the bed and tell him to close his eyes. Once you are sure he isn't peeking you remove the dress you were wearing and throw it into the hamper in the corner of the room. You let him know that he can open his eyes and when he does you don't fail to notice the way his eyes darken when they look at you. His expression shifts from one of pure admiration to something darker and full of lust. You can hear it in the timber of his voice when he says, "Come here princess let daddy get a closer look at you."

You can't help but do what he asks this was your plan after all and you couldn't be more glad that it worked. As you step closer he places his hands on your thighs. It is gentle at first and then he moves up higher. Wrapping his arms around your thighs and pulling you closer so he can see as he moves his hands up to your ass and giving it a firm squeeze. Then he lands a sharp spank on your left cheek and soothes it by rubbing his hand softly over the spot. "Look at you, baby. You look so good for me all wrapped in lace like this. I will try not to ruin it while I am busy fucking you into oblivion," he growls from his position below you. From that same position, he lifts you up with no issues and tosses you gently onto the bed so that you're lying on your back.

He takes his sweet time kissing and nipping at your inner thighs. He makes his way so slowly to the place you need him most. You can feel how wet you are just from this and he hasn't even properly started yet. You know that he is doing this on purpose and are sure this was his own plan ever since he became suspicious of you planning something. He was moving so slowly and so gently and you knew that he could see how much it affected you from the ever-growing wet patch on your new panties. "Da-daddy please don't tease me anymore I c-can't take it. I need you please," you beg gasping when he nips just a little bit harder at your most sensitive parts.

"That's it, baby beg for me. Beg for me to use this pretty little pussy however I want," he replies finally giving you some type of relief by rubbing a thumb up and down your covered folds. He continued that for a little while longer and then gave in at the sound of your desperate moans. He pulled the panties down your legs and once they were fully off he shoved them into the pocket of his slacks. You already struggled to think and he was only getting started. It only got worse when he finally gave your pussy the attention you wanted him to. He licked a long stripe up your glistening folds humming in satisfaction at your taste.

"What do you think princess should I take my time eating you out until you cum again and again on my face or would you just like me to get you ready enough to take my cock," he asks. It was getting hard to form words. The combination of his tongue and his two fingers that joined shortly after his question was blurring your mind with pleasure. He stops all movement to say, "Come on baby use your words. Already so fucked dumb and I have barely even done anything yet. What do you want you can say it."

"I w- I want to-to-to- wanna get ready for daddy's cock," you say barely able to string the sentence together. Jaebum had a way of doing that to you and you loved it. You loved being able to give yourself over to the pleasure he brought you and he loved it too. Hearing your answer JB dove in like a man starved. After so many years he knew your body like nobody else and he knew exactly what to do to bring you over the edge. His mouth licking your sensitive clit and his middle and ring fingers plunging deep into you. Every time you'd touch yourself when he wasn't around you could never get your fingers to go as deep as his. He brought you ecstasy like nothing else. You could feel yourself getting closer.

"Daddy I am so close please can I cum I really wanna cum on your face please please, please," you begged almost crying.

"Cum baby cum all over my face and then again one more time on my cock after," he said temporarily removing his mouth from your clit and then going right back. When he replaces his mouth you feel yourself let go coming all over his face and fingers. It feels so good but you know you aren't done yet. He wastes no time moving away to remove his own clothes and then flipping you over. He pulls your hips up and once he has the right position he slides right in. He gives you enough time to adjust to him and as soon as he's sure you're okay he sets a fast pace. At first, his hands are on your hips giving your ass harsh slaps every so often that make you yelp and moan at the painful pleasure. Then his hands move to your hair each hand taking one of the pigtails and then pulling back making your back arch and he is able to hit a new deeper angle. He can feel you tightening around him and he knows you're close again which is good because so is he. He leans down into your ear, "That's it, baby just a little more, and then let's cum together yeah?"

He keeps up this pace and it is only a matter of time before you're falling off the edge cumming all over his cock and he follows seconds after. Cum spurting out in thick ropes into you. It takes a moment for you both to calm down but when you finally do he goes to the bathroom to get a warm rag to clean you up. "That was amazing and you should online shop more often if this is what it leads to," he jokes.

"Yeah I will get right on that," you respond with a laugh. He helps you clean up, take your make-up off, and let your hair down. You both fall asleep in each other's arms after exchanging a sincere 'I love you' and you couldn't be happier to end your day with him.

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A/N: HOLY COW!!! I am so sorry for being so late on this one but like I said it was really self-indulgent and I definitely got super carried away. Luckily day 3 is done and day 4 will be out later today so as a bonus for this one being late you technically get two in one day! HOORAY!

[idolimagines]

I have a request. Will you do a oneshot where it's your wedding day and you have a flashback on how Jackson enlisted the help of all the members to help him setup a treasure hunt proposal? At the end the you're crying happy tears because you are pronounced as husband and wife?

Thank you for the request! I hope you like it.

Title: Mrs. Wang

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 1.5K

The fresh smell of orchids filled your nose as soon as the double doors opened and revealed your grand entrance.

The room was filled with guests consisting of your closest family and friends. It was an elegant and intimate wedding adorned with pearl and satin accents and highlighted with the most beautiful shade of Robin’s egg blue. Several gasps were heard and all eyes were on you as you gracefully began to walk down the aisle to your soon-to-be husband, Mr.Jackson Wang. He stared at you lovingly, tears pooling his eyes at first sight of you in your wedding dress. As you continued to make your way towards him, you couldn’t help but admire his handsome appearance. He was dressed in a classic tuxedo and his chocolate brown hair was swept to the side with gel. Jackson’s thick brows helped highlight the rest of his sharp features, from his deep, dark brown eyes to his plump lips that you were dying to kiss.

As you neared the altar, you spotted Jackson’s best man, Jaebum quietly handing him a small handkerchief as a sign to dry his teary eyes. Jaebum earned a thumbs up from Yugyeom and BamBam who were sitting in the front row along with Jinyoung, Youngjae and Mark. It wasn’t long before Jackson dried his tears and walked down the three small steps to meet you. “You’re so beautiful” he whispered just before taking your hand into his and leading you up the steps to the altar. In that moment you felt like you could turn to mush just seeing how he smiled at you so lovingly. Jackson remembered how nervous you were just the day before seeing as you wanted everything to go perfectly smooth. You had been planning this wedding for months and now that the day was finally here, you hoped your hard work had paid off. However, all negative thoughts instantly vanished as Jackson held both of your hands and gently rubbed his thumbs against your fingers, almost as if to give you that nonverbal reassurance you didn’t know you needed.

The officiant began reciting his usual script just after thanking everyone for coming together to witness the lifelong commitment you and Jackson were about to make. Before you knew it, you were suddenly drowning out the officiant’s voice and taking in every single word your fiance uttered before you. Jackson spoke from the heart, looking you in the eyes as he first mentioned how you took his breath away when he first laid eyes on you all those years ago. He made the crowd laugh when he briefly mentioned having to pull out all his smooth moves on you just to give him your number back in the day. You couldn’t help but let out a chuckle as well as you reminisced about your beginning and all the good times you’ve had that led up to this moment.

Jackson bit his bottom lip as he looked at you with tears growing in his eyes again. He bit down on his lip a little too hard, almost as if to stop his voice from shaking before taking a deep breath. “You are my everything,” he added. You looked up at him and smiled while you felt your own tears forming. “I admire you so much.” Jackson said, “You’re the kindest, most loving person I know and I wake up everyday wanting to be the best version of myself because of you. Thank you for always being by my side and I promise to always be by yours. I love you, _____.” 

By this point, tears were cascading down your face before you took a deep breath to begin exchanging your vows. Similarly to Jackson, you declared your infinite love for him and emphasized the impact he has had on your life just as you had his. You spoke of the many moments of laughter and love you two shared throughout the years and made sure to mention just how much he means to you before the officiant continued reciting his script and allowed you two to exchange wedding bands. You watched as Jackson gently placed the band on your finger before locking eyes with you again. After a few more moments, you were suddenly wrapping your arms around his neck as he dipped you and bestowed a kiss just after the coordinator said, “you may kiss your bride.”

The crowd erupted with cheers and chants in celebration of your new milestone. You stood at the altar with Jackson hand in hand, taking in the special moment as you both faced the crowd. You watched as Jackson’s best friends, or more like brothers in the first row whistled and cheered you two on. It brought a smile to your face as the sight of them reminded you of how you two got to this point in the first place - the proposal. 

You remembered how Jackson had recruited the boys to set up a sort of ‘treasure hunt’ like proposal for you. It started with a sly little note at home, with details and clues of where to find your dress, shoes and accessories Jackson had bought for you for the night. He then had Youngjae drive you to your next destination, which was one of the best hotels in the city. Once you arrived you were greeted by Mark, Yugyeom and Jinyoung and instructed to find more clues that would lead you to the ‘treasure.’ “Guys what is going on,” you would occasionally ask as you followed a trail of rose petals and made your way through the hotel and towards the back door. Throughout your search you would find short love notes and compliments seemingly from Jackson along the way.

“Is this what I think it is?’ You asked with a big smile when you saw Jaebum and BamBam. You could feel your heart pounding as you neared them and noticed BamBam’s mischievous smile. “I don’t know. Only one way to find out,” BamBam chimed as he opened the door for you and motioned for you to continue. You will never forget the butterflies you felt as you exited the back door and found yourself walking along the beach at sunset just before catching sight of Jackson. He was standing before the ocean with his hands clasped together, almost as if he had been just as nervous as you were. He was dressed in a white button down and khaki trousers rolled up to his knees.

“Jackson!” You cheered as you made your way to him a little quicker. “Come here,” he chuckled as he eagerly awaited your arrival. “What are you doing out here?” You giggled as he immediately pulled you in for a hug as soon as you reached him. “I know the beach makes you happy, so I wanted to bring you here,” he answered in a calm tone. You smiled at him before looking out to the ocean, admiring how beautiful it looked as the sun set over it. “Yeah there’s nothing quite like this view,” you hummed. 

“Or you,” Jackson added. “There’s no one quite like you, _____.” He said while admiring you and causing you to look at him once more. You watched as he swiftly reached into his pocket and pulled out a beautiful ring. “Jackson-” you gasped as he kneeled in front of you. “I mean it, ____. There’s no one else in the world like you. You’re one of a kind and you mean so much to me.” He confessed. Jackson gazed upon your beauty and suddenly became at a loss for words as he began to stumble upon his next thought. “To be honest, I had a whole script planned out in my head, but looking at you now. Wow.” He smiled. “I just can’t think of what else to say now other than I love you. Will you make me the happiest man on Earth and marry me?” 

You gasped as you heard those words come out of his mouth. You had dreamed of this day so long as it was one-step closer to marrying the love of your life. “Yes of course!” You exclaimed before jumping into his arms and kissing him tenderly. You were surprised as fireworks erupted from above and the rest of the boys appeared, shouting and cheering in awe as their best friend was set to marry the one who made his heart full. 

Those same cheers echoed in your mind as you came back to reality and smiled at Jackson’s life-long friends just before he whisked you up and yelled, “This is my wife!” To everyone in excitement. “Oh my gosh,” you laughed at his antics as more cheers erupted. “Already announcing it to the world?” You added. “Yes!” Jackson beamed. “Now, how about we get out of here, Mrs. Wang?” he asked with a grin and you nodded. “Let’s do it-” you barely uttered before Jackson took off with you in his arms and ran down the aisle. You nearly screamed in surprise and held onto him for dear life with your bouquet barely hanging on. You tossed the flowers aside to gain a better grip as Jackson neared the car outside. “Mrs. Wang,” you cooed. “I like the sound of that.”

[army-in-the-stars]

[dalamjisung]

✿dalamjisung's directory✿

Hello there! Welcome to my masterlist!

I'm a multi-fandom writer focusing mainly on Stray Kids and Criminal Minds right now, but my works expand to GOT7 and BTS too! From series to one shots, I do it all >.<

Minors DO NOT interact with content tagged 18+!

Currently working on:

✧ a muted shade of green series (Criminal Minds!Spencer Reid) ✧ summertime's special series (Stray Kids collab with @catiuskaa)

Individual masterlists:

✧ Stray Kids ✧ Criminal Minds ✧ GOT7 ✧ BTS

[ahgasefordayz]

Meeting the Family

"Hello! I really want to know if u could make one JB or Mark x reader when they are dating a foreign, and then he will be presenting her for the guys but she's is insecure if they will like her. (if she was brown I'll be so happy) ❤️ sorry for my broken English I'm trying my best haha"

Hi! It's been a while! I hope you like it! -Admin Izzy

Meeting family for the first time is scary, especially when you don’t even speak the same language. You have been stressing and running over the night in your head for weeks. You want, no you need to impress JB’s parents in order for this relationship to work. He has told you many times that if they don’t like you, which he is sure they will, that it won’t change what you both have. You know he believes that, but do you?

Family is so important to you, if you parents didn’t like JB it would crush you, so that’s what is troubling you. Growing up in the South, family is the focal point for any relationship to work, so this has to go well.

JB walks into the room after making sure to dry the laundry before you leave and sees you pacing back and forth with a frown on your face. With a smile he walks towards you and catches your attention.

You didn’t even know you were pacing until you looked down and noticed the way the carpet had moved to fit your trail. Stopping in your tracks, you look up at him with a sheepish expression.

“I didn’t know I was pacing..” you say as he stands tall in front of you with a small smile.

“I know you are worried, but you will soon think it to be silly. My parents are so excited to meet you, you need to know that.”, he says gently.

He knows that your anxiety has taken over you all week and has made sure to be extra gentle and caring to ease your concerns. JB knows how much you care and love him, and he is sure as soon as you and his parents interact, they will know too. He gets it. He felt the same way when he first met your family. Meeting people that know and love your partner the most is scary. He remembers sitting at the dinner table with your father at the head of the table dissecting his every move. He had never been around a big family, unless you count Mark’s, but he considered them family, too.

Southern families, especially African American families, are very tight knit, and he knew that if they didn’t see him to be worthy, then he was out. He made sure to talk about football with your father and uncles, and clean up the table and dishes with your uncle. At the end of the night, they were wishing you both could stay longer, and it gave him a warm feeling in his chest. He wanted that for you as well. JB knew that meeting family was also a big step, but he needed you to know that it was because of how much he believed in your love.

Taking your chin, he moves it up to where you are staring into each other’s eyes. He gives a long and firm kiss, letting you know everything is going to be alright.

“Do you remember when I met your entire family last month?”, he said with a smirk.

Watching your face change from a frown to a grin, you replied, “I do, and I’m so sorry. I told my mom not to tell anyone, but of course she has to brag at the church potluck that she had a Kpop star coming to dinner. That led to Aunt Kitty wanting to come and so on and so on…”

He then matched your grin remembering how your Aunt Kitty made it known she was single and if he had any single friends to let her know.

“She was very spirited, I’ll give her that.”, he chuckled, “but seriously, I was so nervous to meet the people that mean the most to you. Once I left, I felt like part of the family, and I know you’ll feel that way, too. Trust me, okay?”

You smiled and pulled him to you and gave him the biggest most reassuring hug you could muster and said, “I trust you.”

[gwldcnz]

🐈‍⬛ ❪ + 𝐏ℝ𝐈𝕍𝐀𝕋𝐄 ℂ𝐎𝕄𝐌𝕀𝐒𝕊𝐈𝕆𝐍 ! ❫ #348 gifs in 268x152px of the talented singer lim jaebeom / jay b (1994) in miscellaneous was delivered to its owner. if you want to commission me please, check the link in the source!

[kgyeomiex]

Distraction (M)

“I could not tell you if I loved you the first moment I saw you, or if it was the second or third or fourth. But I remember the first moment I looked at you walking towards me and realized that somehow the rest of the world seemed to vanish when I was with you.”

JYP has announced a new girl group in the company and you happened to be one of the members. The moment you signed in, that was the moment you were hoping to just focus on music and your career, but something gets in the way. A massive love triangle is what causes a bumpy road for you and your future.

Previous Parts:

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4 // Part 5 // Part 6 // Part 7 // Part 8 //

Part 9 is here~

Masterlist

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Regardless of what you say, you will always get distracted by these boys. Jaebum and Mark tend to show up out of nowhere when you try your hardest to focus on your music...

A normal person would stand by their group and show their devotion and full attention to the music however in your case it’s different...

“Y/N, I was hoping I would bump into you,” Mark says, smiling right at you.

Right now, your brain was telling you to get away and focus on the big day but for some reason, your feet weren't moving.

“M-mark, what’s up?” Why did you just stutter... Great not only is your body ignoring your command, but now you can’t even speak to the boy.

“I don’t know if you’re busy, but I was wondering if you maybe wanted to get lunch with me... Just me,” Mark wanted to go eat with you? How on earth can you say no to that?

Even though you knew you should reject his kind gesture you just spoke without really thinking about your answer.

“Sure,” as soon as you said that you realized what you said, and you tried your hardest to smile instead of showing your shocked face.

Shit...

“Perfect... I just need to return this to Yugyeom but if you’d like you can meet me in the front,” Mark suggests, and instead of saying anything you nodded your head and continued to smile.

Okay clearly speaking wasn’t helping you out... Instead, it was making things more complicated for you.

“Great, I’ll see you soon,” Mark smiles and takes off.

Instead of even moving you stood there frozen trying to figure out what your plan was... Just a second ago you were talking about devoting all your attention to your career and not on boys. Crazy how your mindset was so quick to change...

Okay... Look at the situation this way. Mark and you were probably just going to eat and then from there split off in your directions.

Hopefully after spending some time with Mark, you can then focus on your music and less on boys....

Yeah... That sounds like a good idea. Will it work? To be honest I have no idea, but a girl can hope and dream.

~

“Jackson did what?” You couldn't help but laugh as Mark was trying to explain how Jackson ended up kissing Jaebum on the lips.

“It was by accident though... Just know that in interviews they will make you do unexpected things like where you have to pass papers around to other members by only using your lips...” You’ve always seen other idols do that and to be honest you always wanted to try it but at the same time no...

“Have you had an incident where you accidentally kissed one of your members?” You asked Mark as you reached in for your drink. He silently thought to himself and then looked at you.

“Okay maybe once or twice... But the whole purpose of the game is to prevent the paper from falling... The paper that these people write is horrible material and always ends up falling at the end,” you smiled, and then a question popped into your head.

“So, Mark tells me, who’s a better kisser?” You asked Mark teasing him and he laughed.

“It’s not like that,” the two of you suddenly began to laugh.

“Even if I did accidentally kiss one of the boys, I didn’t enjoy any of them,” Mark defended himself and you just smiled.

“Sure...”

Sitting in front of Mark and having lunch with him wasn’t bad. The two of you were just spending time with one another and laughing, you know what friends do.

“Hey Y/N... I know this is random, but I have a question,” Mark says, and before you could answer you grabbed a napkin and wiped your mouth before replying.

“What’s up?” You asked as soon as you finished chewing.

“I know I probably shouldn't ask a question like this, but I can’t help but be curious...” At first, you were confused. What kind of question was Mark planning to ask you but then you had an idea... It’s probably going to involve what happened back at the studio when you were being put on the spot in front of everyone.

“Ask away,” you had an idea of what this question was going to be, and even though you weren’t ready to answer you had to face it eventually.

“Do Jaebum and you possibly have a secret relationship?” Mark asks, looking directly at you.

Well, that was straightforward... There is nothing to hide because Jaebum and you aren’t even dating or anything. When you told the boys back at the studio that you don’t have a relationship with Jaebum or Mark you were serious about it.

The answer would be beyond different if the boys were to ask what your feelings towards them but since they didn’t you are fine.

“No Jaebum and I are just friends,” you said as you looked into Mark’s eyes, so he knew you were telling the truth.

“That’s good to hear,” you were about to ask him why but then suddenly a memory replayed in your head...

For a second you almost forgot that Mark confessed he liked you... You looked down at your plate of food and tried your hardest to contain your smile.

Eventually, silence appeared and the two of you were now sitting there eating not saying a single word to one another...

So were you two planning to stay quiet now...

“M-”

“Y-”

The both of you stopped talking and just smiled.

Things were starting to become complicated... After talking to Sana and hearing her advice you looked at Mark and then back at your food. You came to JYP to live your dreams, not look for boys...

This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. You remember reading an article where DAY6 had 6 members in the beginning, but someone was kicked out after JYP found out he had a girlfriend.

If you continue to allow your feelings to get in the way you will get kicked out of the company before you can live your dreams.

“What do your plans consist of tomorrow?” Marks asks and you suddenly begin to move your food around not wanting to eat.

“Um well, tomorrow we will have our debut showcase. Then we have photoshoots and interviews so tomorrow will be a very busy day.” In the past couple of days, you have had a chance to spend time with the boys which led you to catch feelings for them... But after today you were going to be busy.

Maybe being busy was going to be a good thing. You weren’t going to have the urge to want to spend time with Jaebum and Mark... Maybe you’ll even get over this crush of yours.

“So will I not be able to see you?” Mark suddenly asks and at that moment the both of you make eye contact.

“I’m not sure....”

Comments like this made it hard to forget why you liked him.

“Well... I enjoyed this lunch, but I think it’s time for me to head back and practice until my feet fall off,” you said dramatically, and Mark smiled.

“Don’t overwork yourself, you do have a busy day head,”

You got up from your seat, grabbed your tray, and left while you could...

Comments like this make it hard for you to just “forget” you have a crush on Mark. He was sweet and considerate.

But sometimes you must sacrifice something for something else... When you look at things it's either you choose your dreams or some boy...

~

Dance practice was going well; however, you would be lying if you were to say you were distracted even if it was the slightest. What was worse about all of this was that you couldn’t talk to your members about it.

You were trying everything you could to ignore your thinking about Mark and focus on what was important... Tomorrow and your busy schedule.

“Okay everyone let’s take 5,” your leader says as she tries to catch her breath.

You all agreed. You walked over to a wall and instantly sat down.

“Y/N!” You looked over and noticed your bandmate Daeun sitting beside you.

“You know although we live together and practice, I feel like I haven’t spoken to you in forever,” it was true but so much has been going on. . .

“I know. But I mean with this debut coming up we’ve all been tired and busy,” you said, and she nodded her head.

She grabs her water bottle and looks at you.

“I know it’s none of my business but lately I noticed you’ve been looking pretty distracted, is everything alright?” You looked at her and began to contemplate with yourself.

Should you open up to Daeun about your situation or keep it to yourself?

You didn’t mean to keep secrets to any of your bandmates, but to be fair you weren’t close to them. Also, this included something that could involve a scandal if you don’t play your cards right and this can affect everyone.

You wouldn’t know how Daeun would feel if you told her about both Mark and Jaebum and how you may like them. . .

“I have been distracted, but it’s nothing concerning. . . Just worried about failing and disappointing everyone around me,” you decided to keep it vague and simple with your explanation.

“Well, girl you have nothing to worry about. Honestly, one thing I always tell myself and I will share with you is that there is no need to stress about the small things. Life has a way of figuring things out, everything happens for a reason.” Daeun says and you nod your head.

“But what if. . .You know something you want to do can affect others around you . . .”

After blurting that out, Daeun looked slightly concerned but instead of asking me what was up, she shrugged.

“Well, only you know what’s best for you. Sometimes you must be selfish and take the risk to make yourself happy before others.” You were surprised to hear advice like this from Daeun, but she was right.

Min-Seo suddenly called everyone back up and we continued to practice. . . After speaking to Daeun, you felt a little less distracted. . .

Everything happens for a reason, right?

You weren’t expecting any of this to take place. You were stuck in a weird position.

When you auditioned to become an idol and even got ACCEPTED you were so happy words could not describe the feeling you felt. You felt speechless, you felt like this was either a mistake or they were probably confusing you with someone else or you felt like you were dreaming...

You remember before your auditions you slept so little to make sure that your routine for your audition went well.

Now here you are about to debut but now you are distracting yourself.

Instead, you are here suddenly getting swayed by boys in this company.

It wouldn’t be much of an issue if JYP didn’t have the dating ban... But if you want to continue being an idol you have to literally push off your feelings and maybe even stop talking to them.

You have worked way too hard to get where you are now. On top of that, you began to recall all the stressful moments you had to endure while training. The harsh criticism you would receive, the whiplash attitude your coaches would give, and the overwhelming feeling you had to deal with...

Honestly, training was probably one of the hardest times you have ever experienced. Back in the dorm, you remember calling your mom and breaking down. You remember the number of times you considered quitting and going to a new root, but you didn’t allow yourself to quit.

Instead, you put on your big girl pants and knew you were going to debut sooner or later.

You worked too hard to suddenly throw all of this away.

Usually, dilemmas like this were a no-brainer but as you began to think.... What if you never feel this way with anyone else you ever meet?

You knew that this was probably just an excuse to avoid letting go of the person you were starting to like...

Were you really going to throw away something you worked so hard for over a guy?

Thinking of Mark was not helping... And weirdly enough you caught yourself even thinking about Jaebum.

You got back on your feet and shook your head.

Now it’s time to focus on what’s important.

- 

After rehearsing the rest of the members were ready to call it a night to head back to the dorm and relax before the big day. However, due to all the distractions you have been experiencing, you decided to stay back to rehearse for an hour or two to make sure you got everything set for tomorrow.

After practicing the main track dance, you felt yourself out of breath. You sat on the floor and looked at yourself in the mirror.

“You got this!” you told yourself trying to tell yourself words of encouragement.

You can’t keep distracting yourself with the thought of these beautiful men. You worked way too hard to be where you are now... How are you going to let that escape through your fingers with just one minor mistake?

You got up and you heard your phone make a noise.

You walked over to your phone and picked it up.

To be honest you were expecting it to be one of your members telling you to head home and rest up for the big day but no...

The person who was texting you at 11 pm was Jaebum.

I heard you were still in the company, so I decided to come by and take you home :)

This text brought mixed feelings. One side of you was happy to receive a text from one of the boys themselves because, to be honest, you enjoyed having a conversation with them. HOWEVER, this is the type of distraction you were trying to avoid.

You brushed your fingers through your hair removing the hair from your face and took a deep breath.

Okay. . . What if you agree for Jaebum to walk you back to the dorm for one last time? That way once you debut you can forget about your friendship with the boys and look at the bigger picture. YEAH!

You texted Jaebum agreeing to his gesture and then put our phone to the side.

Let’s just practice one more time before you call it quits.

-

As you were dancing the last chorus you suddenly noticed a shadow creeping up by the dance studio door. You were going to stop to look back, but you couldn’t afford distraction. You assumed it was Jaebum so instead of looking back you continued to dance and lip sync not trying to miss a beat.

As you were on the floor doing a dance move, you noticed Jaebum walking in and then looked away looking at yourself in the mirror instead.

FOCUS.

Look at the bigger picture.

You continued to perform as if you were standing on stage in front of a big crowd, but you were tempted to look over and look at Jaebum.

Fortunately, the song was coming to an end.

As you were finishing the last set of dance moves, you posed as the music came to an end and you could hear Jaebum cheering.

You looked over and smiled.

You wanted to say something, but you needed to catch your breath.

Jaebum noticed how tired you were after that last dance, and he noticed your water bottle close by the dance studio window. He grabbed the water bottle, walked over to you and you looked at him.

“Thank you,” you grabbed onto the water bottle and then took a sip before you continued to talk to Jaebum.

After taking a sip, you looked at him.

“What brings you to the studio, shouldn’t you be home?” You asked him and he shrugged.

“We finished early with recordings, and I was told that you were still in the dance studio so I came to make an appearance.” you couldn’t lie you felt your heart warm up a little at the thought of Jaebum staying here to see you.

No.... You don’t like him. . . You think.

As you walked over to your bag you said “You didn’t have to stay, you could have gone home and rested. I’m sure you had a busy day,”

Jaebum shrugged and smiled.

“Waiting for you was no problem. . . I was hoping I had a chance to see you today,” as those words came out of Jaebum's mouth you looked over at him and couldn’t help but smile.

Comments like this are not helping whatsoever.

Sometimes you get curious and wonder if Jaebum was interested in you as a woman but then again maybe it’s better if you don’t know the answer to that.

Your brain and your feelings are in a complete battle. What the hell are you supposed to do?

You realized you were so lost in your thoughts you haven’t responded to Jaebum.

“Ah so you just wanted me to bug you more, well your wish is my command,” you teased Jaebum, and he laughed.

You couldn’t risk being flirtatious with Jaebum. You don’t know what kind of outcome comes with and right about now you didn’t want to put yourself in any kind of predicament. Now that you were trying your hardest to stay on the right path you knew you just had to friend-zone the man.

“What can I say, life becomes a little bit more exciting when I am with you,” Jaebum blurts out, and after hearing that you instantly avoid eye contact.

Oh no... He is making it harder and harder to not like.

-

“Sometimes I wonder if becoming an idol is worth all this trouble,” you confessed to Jaebum as you two strolled along the street side by side. 

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I mean the restriction we have when becoming an idol. We have to put up this facade to keep fans happy. We have to give them this illusion that we are perfect and happy all the time when in reality we are human like the rest of them. . .” You weren’t even an idol yet, but you already started to feel like the fame life was going to be harder than most people realize. 

Right now, you seemed conflicted just because tomorrow was the big day. Although you haven’t been friends with Jaebum and Mark for that long, it’s felt like so much has been going on and you haven’t been keeping your eyes on the prize. 

“I know what you mean, I think it’s normal for anyone to have that kind of thought. But in the end, you always think and look at the bigger picture. What do you want?”Jaebum asks you and you look at him. 

“I really want to make sure tomorrow is a complete success. I didn’t go through blood sweat and tears getting criticized left and right just not to debut at the end. You know?”After getting advice from different people, you suddenly decided to make a decision. 

It was now time to put your foot down. Although the past couple of days you have enjoyed the presence of both Jaebum and Mark, you knew it had to come to an end. 

Well, you didn’t have to cut them off completely, but boundaries had to be made and you knew that you had to avoid ever letting things get deeper for example your feelings for each of them.

- 

Bzzz

You opened your eyes, and you looked up at the ceiling.

For some reason, it felt like you didn’t sleep at all. The moment you got home you had a hard time falling asleep. You were so nervous yet excited about your showcase today. . .

The day had officially arrived. You were finally going to debut and make a name for yourself.

You sat up and felt a mix of emotions.

Today is going to be a good day. You weren’t going to let anything get in your way.

Just as you were planning to get up from the bed you suddenly heard a knock on the door. Min-See opens the door and peeks her head through the door.

“Y/N are you awake?” she must have heard your alarm but hasn’t seen you step out of your room.

“I’m awake,” you told her, and she smiled.

You could see how worried she appeared to be. You couldn’t blame her; the feeling was mutual. Although to be fair you all should be confident for today’s showcase, especially with the amount of practice you guys had.

Day’s like today you couldn’t afford any kind of distraction. You walked over to your mirror and took one look at yourself. Right about now it was time for a pep talk.

Today is the big day. After all the rejections, all the struggles, and all of the hard work you put in, today was the day you were going to finally show what you have been working hard on. Today was the day you could finally show your mom that all those tears you shed during the process were worth it at the end of the day.

However, it seemed like in the back of your head you had a slight fear appearing making you think about the what if. What if your debut isn’t as successful as you were hoping? What if people don’t find interest in your group? What if this love triangle you seem to be in becomes far harder than it has been?

You could feel your mind filled with so many different thoughts, but you were trying your hardest to keep yourself together. This is fear talking.

Today was a big day for your group and you and you weren’t going to let anyone take that away from you.

-

As you were in the dressing room getting your makeup done, you were thinking about the lyrics to your own song and the choreography over and over. Today was the day you couldn’t afford any kind of mistake.

The makeup artist instructs you to close your eyes and begins to apply eyeshadow. Suddenly you hear the door open and the staff in your room saying hello to whoever came through the doors. Without thinking twice, you opened your eyes and there you see Mark walking in with a basket in his hand.

Seeing Mark gave you mixed feelings. One side of you was happy to see the fact that Mark cleared his busy schedule just to come down here and wish you luck. . . Like, let’s be honest what kind of guy does that? And then the other side of you isn’t very happy to see Mark just because you knew he could be a big distraction... Can you see the dilemma?

“Mark?” Your makeup artist pulled away from doing your makeup and smiled.

“I’ll give you a few minutes to talk to your friend,”

You thanked your makeup artist and then continued to look at Mark.

“Surprise,” he says as he approaches you with the basket in his hand.

“Surprise is right. . . What brings you down here?” You asked him and just as Mark was about to speak up, he was cut off when someone else walked through the door.

Another person you weren’t expecting to see was right there in front of you. Of course... Jaebum also made an appearance.

What the hell do you do now?

-

To Be Continued...

[onewmin]

snow on the beach | jaebeom | knj | 18+

Parings: Lim Jaebeom x fem!reader x Kim Namjoon

Summary: You reminisce on the memories about the most important men in your life after being caught in between them, your feelings put at stake.

Warnings: AU, SMUT (do not engage in my works if you’re a minor), non-graphic description of sex, mentions of oral (f receiving), friends to friends with benefits to friends to lovers (?), mentions of cheating, profanity, the reader doesn’t know what she feels (very elena gilbert of hers), a very cheesy thing in the end (pls I’m a sucker for such stupid clichés) and a cliffhanger of course; typos, a slight of angst

Author’s note: hope you enjoy this… whatever this is lmao. Let me know what you think!!

Pics are taken from Pinterest, if you know their owners, pls let me know!!

Disclaimer: My works are not for minors to read. All the appearances of real people are taken for inspiration purposes only. I do not own anything, except for my writing.

Masterlist

A summer breeze blew through your hair, hugging your shoulders with its warmth. There’s something about beaches, something that has always drawn you to this place. Is it the ocean, the small waves of which washed over your feet in the early hours of the days; is it the sand, that was always collected in your shoes after you walked around? You don’t really know, to be honest. You just know that you love being on the beach, whether it’s winter or summer, whether you’re alone of with someone else.

Five years ago, Jaebeom took you to the beach to teach you how to swim. Back then, you’d been friends for over a year, and shared the benefits for several months. The beach was secluded, isolated almost; so after his successful lessons, the two of you ended up making out on the sand. You remember sitting on his lap, arms wrapped around him, hands in his hair, tugging. You remember his grips on your waist, fingers putting hair behind your ears, slow kisses with sweet nothings whispered in between them. None of you had ever opened up to the other party of the mess, coming clear with the mutual feelings the two of you had developed. He never spoke of, and neither did you. You two just continued making love and acting like a couple until some months later you met Namjoon.

“Joon asked me to be his girlfriend”, you said to Jaebeom, when the two of you were smoking outside the bar.

“What did you answer?”

You shrugged your shoulders and threw the cigarette in the bin. “Figured I’d talk to you first”.

Jaebeom peered right through you, and then took the second cigarette from the pack. “No need to. He’s a great guy. You should go for it”.

Deep inside your head, you were hoping he’d snap, take your hand and pull you in his arms, whispering about you being his girl, like he did when you’d have sex. But he never did. And so the two of you were only friends again.

You grew to love Kim Namjoon quite quickly; he was always tender with you, gentle touches left on your cheeks whenever the two of you kissed. He fell for you first, having spent months dancing around you, trying to approach you the best way possible. He’d bring you flowers, take you on long bike rides and meet you after work. You’d go on simple dates, like movies or walks, but you were mesmerized by every little thing he did for you. However, Jaebeom wasn’t the bad guy in the story either: he was still you close friend. And prior to Namjoon, he had also done everything to make you fall for him.

But Jaebeom never acknowledged that. Namjoon did.

For your first anniversary the two of you rode your bikes to the beach to have a picnic, while watching the sunset. There were plenty of people there too, but you only saw Joon, and his ever glowing love reflected in him holding your hand and smiling brightly at everything you said.

And while the time was passing, Jaebeom had gotten in and out multiple relationships, you and Namjoon stood strong, facing every challenge together. Him and Jaebeom grew to be friends too, and you never touched upon you and him being an item before Joon. Because, no matter how friendly they’d been to each other, Kim Namjoon was overly possessive whenever he saw you and Jaebeom together.

Something seems off, he’d think to himself, judging you male best friend silently, but I can’t grasp what. You had to reassure him a thousand times that there was nothing between the two of you, — at least, not anymore — and he’d cool down, coming back to that sweet persona of his.

And the time has passed almost invisibly, marking your fifth anniversary as lovers and second one as an engaged couple. Things were going pretty great, horrendously sweet the two of you are, your friends would say.

Jaebeom, on the other hand, four months prior to your anniversary, had broken up with his long-term girlfriend — probably, the first one in years that he had very serious intentions about. He called you in the middle of the night, his speech slurring, for you to find him in the alley, drunkenly unconscious. Having carried him to your car, you heard him mumbling to himself, lying in the backseat, while you were driving him home.

“Jaebeom, you’re heavy son of a bitch”, you huffed, after putting him in his bed, and taking his clothes off. You didn’t feel the wave of embarrassment seeing him in his boxers only; you only felt a tsunami of irritation growing inside of you.

“Stay”, he grabbed your wrist when you had put the blanket over his body.

“Jaebeom, you know I can’t stay”, your annoyance turned into softness the moment you heard his weak voice.

“I can’t sleep without you”, he looked you right in the eyes, “I think… I think about you a-all the time”, he stuttered.

“Oh god, you’re too drunk”, you replied and released yourself from his grip. He was obviously imagining his ex-girlfriend brought him home. That’s what you kept on telling yourself even when you heard him murmur your name when leaving.

The two of you never spoke of that. Not until two months ago.

Your friends would tell you about the most bizarre experiences of them finding out their partners were cheating: catching them red-handed was the most outdated one. Nevertheless, no matter how ‘boring’ it was, that what happened to you. Namjoon and the girl from his work, in your bed, in the bed the two of you have shared for the past three years.

“It’s not what you think!” Followed you as you flew out of the apartment, only to jump in your car and drive, drive, drive until you couldn’t feel your hands, which were gripping the wheel tightly. You stopped near the beach.

Sitting on the sand, you shivered from the cold spring wind as a harbinger of the heavy rain that followed shortly after you arrived. The raindrops fell on the water, creating ripples on its surface; and you didn’t know what really soaked the sand — the rain or your tears.

Soaked to the core, you tried to warm yourself in the car, bone-shaking sobs ripping your heart apart with every breath you took. You stayed in the car, in the parking lot of the supermarket outside the city, and fell asleep in the driver’s seat, head resting on your hands on the steering wheel.

You drove to Jaebeom’s house in the morning, just to cry more, being safe in his arms. He made you stay in his house even for longer, as you felt sick the next day, your beach experience being the fault. Namjoon was banned from visiting.

“She doesn’t want to see you”, you woke up to hear the words coming from the hall of Jaebeom’s house.

“Is that what she said?” You knew Namjoon’s voice all too well not to recognize him. “Or this are your words?”

“Both”.

“She’s my fiancée, not yours, Jaebeom”.

“Is she still?” Jaebeom chuckled. “Don’t remember her being ecstatic about your wedding since she caught you fucking someone else”.

1:0, Jaebeom won that round. Namjoon left but kept on bombarding your phone, texting and calling all the time. What could he possibly tell you? That it was a mistake? That him sleeping with his colleague was… What? What possible excuse could he ever given to make you forgive what he had done?

The anger has turned into resentment; you could no longer think of Namjoon without feeling sick to your stomach. Your engagement ring was in your bag, a lingering memory of the moments you were the happiest.

“Have you ever thought about it?” You and Jaebeom were sitting on the couch, watching TV in his house. You’ve just gotten better, but he insisted you stayed a little bit longer. You didn’t mind.

“About what?”

“About…” He hummed. “About us”.

“Us?”

He took a deep breath. “Like, if we… If you and me… Shit”. He ran his hand through the hair. “If I, uh…”. Jaebeom stopped for a moment again. “If I asked you to be my girlfriend back then, would you be mine?”

Gawking at him, you opened and closed your mouth, being unable to produce a sound or a thought. Just like that? Five years have passed!

“What are you… What are you talking about?” Your words came out as a whisper.

He moved closer to you, having taken your hands in his. “I-I just… I just want to know”. His brown eyes scanned you, pupils dilating every time his gaze stopped at your lips.

“It’s been too long for me to even remember-“

“I couldn’t forget”. His words firm, unlike the soft caressing of your hands by his fingers. “Because no matter how much time passed, I find myself still… Still drawn to you”. Your chest suddenly was heavy and the heartbeat was the only sound you could hear. “Don’t you ever think of… us?”

Your verbal answer came out as silence, but you quickly found yourself pulling him in for a kiss. Starting slowly, it escalated into a heavy one, tongues sloppily meeting in between moans. You never dreamt to be in his arms ever again, nevertheless, you were.

The couch was no longer enough as the two of you crawled to his bed, entangled in the sheets. His touches were the same, same as you remembered them: simply perfect for you. His head buried between your thighs, exploring your most sensitive spot once again, even more skillfully and satisfyingly this time.

And as you were riding him, head thrown back, both of you lost in pleasure, your personal Edem inside his bedroom. The way he tugged on your hair, gently and tenderly, when talking you from behind, open-mouthed kisses left on your back and shoulders. Every year spent suppressing your desire for each other turned into an erupting volcano; and there was no possibility to stop the disaster from happening.

You regretted it in the morning. You regretted it until Jaebeom woke up and grinned at you, lips touching your forehead in a soothing kiss, as if he’d felt the pain you were feeling. The said pain was relieved by the kiss, and then by another, turned into making out, turned into him slowly thrusting into you. For several hours you couldn’t even remember Namjoon’s name — as if the mere touch of Jaebeom’s erased your fiancé from your head.

However, not from your heart. No matter how good it was, no matter the suppressed feelings for Jaebeom coming back, you still had feelings for Namjoon as well. Torn apart, you were unable to leave Jaebeom, ‘cause doing it felt like leaving him forever. It seemed if you stepped out of his house, you’d lose him forever. But if you stayed? If you stayed, wouldn’t you lose Namjoon?

Did he think about that when cheating on you?

So you drove to the beach instead. Summer is in its full bloom, people walking around, swimming, laughing. Not many of them, but enough for you not to feel lonely. And as the weather seems perfect, you close your eyes to trust your faith to the only place you ever felt safe at.

“If it snows today, now, on the beach”, you speak to the ocean through your thoughts, eyes squeezed, “I’ll drive home to the man I love”. As if you knew. As if you had a clear vision of your future. As if you one whom to love.

And as you stand there, eyes still closed, several minutes pass. When you hear people’s voices suddenly getting louder, you lift your head to look at the sky. Opal colored just five minutes ago, now it was grey, clouds covering the sun.

Could it really snow on the beach in the middle of the summer?

[mayumicreation]

Im Jaebum

[hoodiejaebum]

where do y'all read your fics these days?

is it ao3 or like. bc I literally only see people with 25 notes and their fics are decent in the got7 tag so yall have to be going somewhere else or there's rly only this many ahgase here

[murderyoursoul]

oh he thinks this is funny 😀 i see 😀

[jae-daddy]

mode

one

genre: romance, mature, melo  plot: two married people fall in love a/n: i know its written dull, but trust me on this.

You wake up everyday facing the balcony of your apartment. 

You never wake up to sunlight creeping in through the space between the blinds in your room. You always wake up just before the alarm, your shoes always placed perfectly so your feet slip into it as you sit on the edge. 

Every morning seems the same. The same monotonous day; the same routine. The same twenty steps around your bathroom, the same cups, the same jar holding the teabags. The same toast and eggs, the same same same same same same same same same same same. 

The same man always wakes up twenty minutes after you. 

You always just happen you be halfway through the door when he enters the kitchen. 

It’s the same bus ride to the same glass building. The same cubicle, the same work, same fake smiles and laughs, same stories. Same everything. 

Tonight you decide to make stew for dinner. But is it really a decision when you make it at least five times a month?

He comes in at nine tonight. 

You tell him to put the dinner away. You get into your bed, and close your eyes. 

Sleep never comes easy, but you close your eyes anyway. 

Your doctor told you to close your eyes even if you’re not sleeping. 

Let the eyes rest. 

But you can feel it moving underneath your eyelids, and now you can feel a migraine forming at the front of your head. 

You feel the bed dip beside you. You remain on your side, ignoring him. You even out your breath, you are asleep. 

I am sleeping. You say it as a mantra over and over again. 

It works tonight. He faces the other side, you hear his phone click open. 

He stays on that phone forever. 

The sounds of the clicking on the keyboard, the endless Tiktoks. Your head is about to burst, you are about to burst. 

And just when you cannot take it anymore, he lets out an obnoxious yawn. You ease, and he relaxes and sleeps. 

You close your eyes waiting for sleep to take you away, but it does last long. 

A few hours, and then you wake up to your balcony again. 

The slippers slide onto your feet. Your pink brush remains where you left it yesterday. 

The cup you sip your tea from as you stare out the window is the same one as yesterday. You got it as a gift from your sister one birthday. It was one of those horrifically cringe ones that says ‘The Greatest Sister Ever.’ 

You both had a fight a day before your birthday. 

You were slipping into your heels when your husband enters the kitchen. 

“Thank you,” he says just like every morning. You give him a small smile. 

Normally that is the end of it, but today there is more, “We have to go to dinner tonight.” 

You still in your actions and look up to meet his eyes. It was like looking at a stranger but worse, you couldn’t even tell what he was thinking. 

But he could read the confusion on your face, “It’s my mum’s birthday.” 

You nod, before looking at the calendar behind him. Even from the door you could see the pink marker around the date. You give him another plain smile, “I’ll pick up a gift on the way back.” 

“It’s okay,” he says, and you’re thankful for it. “I’ll pick up something.”

“Okay,” you say, and slip your shoes on completely. You stand awkwardly for a second, and he looks at you too. How can you live with someone for twelve months and feel like complete strangers with them?

“Have a good day,” he says. Your lips part, and the silence stretches for a bit too long, but you finally manage,“You too.”

You escape before anymore awkward pleasantries pass between you. 

The bus is busy like always. You find a space and smile at the girl already sitting there. 

You let out a deep breath, and then inhale. You do it three more times, and a place a hand on your chest. Your heart was beating so fast, but you didn’t know why. 

Apart from the mild heart-attack (it wasn’t actually a heart-attack, you googled it), the rest of the day was the same. The court room was the same, you had lunch with the same two girls, at the same lunchroom. The bus ride was the same; awful, humid and tiresome.

But tonight when you went home, you didn’t cook dinner. 

Instead you showered, and changed into a pretty pale yellow dress. You did your hair into a nice pretty bun. You put on makeup and the lipstick that matches you so perfectly you save it for special occasions. 

You get on your knees and pull out the box with your special heels. 

You were going to meet your in-laws, you had to look nice. 

Once ready, you took a look in the mirror. 

You looked pretty. 

How long had it been since you dressed up? 

Your husband came soon after. He gave you a small smile as he took you in. You took in the pink wrapped box in his hand, and then your eyes went to the bouquet of flowers in the other. 

He placed them both on the table next to the fruit bowl. 

He went into the bathroom, and you stared at the flowers. 

You wanted flowers too. 

Growing up you never wanted to live in an apartment. You wanted to live in a house with a lawn or the country-side, somewhere where you could plant an entire garden. You would plant every flower you could get your hands on. It didn’t even have to look pretty as long as they bloomed you were happy with it. 

You made a few attempts to plant in the apartment when you first moved in. The proof of that lies brown and dry in colourful flower pots outside on the balcony. 

You didn’t realise you were staring at the flowers the entire time until he emerged from the bedroom. 

He looked good. 

He was good-looking. 

The white shirt and casual blazer you laid out for him, hoping he would wear it, looked good on him. 

You didn’t say anything though. He didn’t too, only, “Ready?”

It wasn’t a question really, more like ready or not here we go. He picked up the keys, the gift, and bunch of flowers. You picked up the tiny handbag you prepared for the night and followed him outside. 

Maybe Uber rides were more comfortable than this. 

The last time you set in one, they asked how your day was at the very least. 

This was one of the few rare occasions you and your husband were made to be in each other’s company completely. Normally, the timings never matched up or there was someone else, or some other distraction. 

People said this is common in arranged marriages. Reassurances and promises of everything working out were passed out to you like candies to a kid on Halloween. 

You just stared out the window, you wished you could put the window down. 

You wished you were in an Uber. 

Your in-laws were good people. 

Your mother-in-law, Jenny, always was in good hopes. She shared the same smile as her son and daughter, but you saw it more on her than anyone else. 

Your husband handed you the gift and kept the flowers for himself. You hand her the pink box and she gushes, excitement evident in her voice, but she still reassures you that you shouldn’t have. 

You’re polite with them. You smile, you laugh, you talk. 

Whenever you’re with them or your own family, or whenever anyone else is around you and your husband, it feels like you’re outside your body. This woman is not you, it’s your husband’s wife. 

“My son,” she places a sloppy kiss on your husbands cheek, he grimaces but his smile is bigger making his eyes disappear. Your heart feels like a mini heart-attack again, but its nothing, google said it was nothing. 

You hug your sister-in-law Jae-e, instead. She hugs you back tightly, before complementing your lipstick, and your smile is true this time. 

Your lipstick was made for you. 

“Justin has come a long way,” you agree after Jae-e finishes her fifteen minute monologue about Justin Bieber’s highs and lows. She was a firm supporter of Selena, but she believes love changes and happens where it needs to, and Justin and Haley are together now. 

You didn’t know much about Justin, you did back in middle school. Your best friend was a die-hard fan. 

“Who’s Justin?” Your husband asks. 

“Justin Bieber,” Jae-e rolls her eyes annoyed with her brother. Your sister and you were the same, it was like you were always teenagers no matter how much time passed. 

“He only knows one JB,” she slides the comment towards you, you snort slightly, and her brother ignores it. 

Or at least he tries to because he begins asking her about her new book. 

The betrayal in her eyes is so funny, you had to bite your lip to hide your grin. 

“It’ll probably be done before I get the chance to play with mum’s grandchild,” she’s proud of her reply, but instantly regrets it when her mother’s head snaps towards you and your husband. 

You are frozen in place, your eyes on the sizzler plate. You wonder if it was still hot; and if so, how much would it burn the big mouthed twat. 

“Yes!” Your mother-in-law gushes, and you start screaming inside. You’re surprised no one can hear you, in a way you are lucky no one can. She continues her loud words and each word makes your ears bleed, “WHEN DO I GET TO PLAY WITH MY GRANDCHILD?!”

She goes on and on. Some other couple who got married after you already has a kid. Another just announced their pregnancy. 

You sat there staring at the plate, and then at the white table cloth. 

White table cloth is so impractical. It basically just highlights all the mistakes a person makes. This family of five does not know how to take out their dishes properly and now there’s stains all over.   

It was your father-in-law who finally stepped in, and said “That’s enough. This is not table conversation.” 

You liked your father-in-law. 

You bow and say goodbye to your in-laws. It was about time. 

Your stomach was so full you were going to explode, and the heel straps were cutting into your skin. You were sure your lipstick had faded away by now. 

All you wanted to do was go home and sleep. 

But you have work tomorrow- no, tomorrow is Saturday!

But you were still excited to feel sleepy, maybe you’ll actually sleep and knock out completely. 

Your thoughts got cut-off when you opened the door of your car. 

“Oh,” you gasped as you picked up a flower from your seat. You showed it to your husband who stood there on his side of the car. “This must have fallen out.”

He bit his lip and then nodded, “Must have.” 

He entered the car. 

You were smiling when you buckled into your seat. You hummed along to songs playing, and looked out the window. You were okay with having the windows up. 

The entire ride, you twirled the flower between your fingers, the yellow petals fluttering with each turn. 

You wanted flowers. 

When you get home, you head straight to the bathroom. The twenty steps increase by three as you place the flower into the cupholder. You stare it for a good minute. 

You strip, shower and change into your pyjamas. 

You watch as your husband as he goes into the bathroom. 

Tonight you wanted it. Tonight you were not going to fall asleep. 

Tonight you watched the light beneath the door. Tonight you didn’t realise as sleep took over you. 

You woke up the next day. No alarm. 

Your slippers sliding onto your feet. Twenty steps around your bathroom. 

The cup- oh. 

You halted in your steps. 

The cup on the table, breakfast spread out and ready. 

Your husband putting on his shoes as he’s rushing out the door. He looks frantic. You want to call out to him, what do you call him? 

He catches sight of you before that, “Office emergency.” 

You nod, smiling, telling him its okay. 

He hesitates, and then the door closes behind him. 

You look over the breakfast. 

Same cup. Same bread and toast. Same egg. Same table. Same room. Same apartment. 

But somehow different. 

[cherylavatars]

avatars — im jaebum (400x640)

veuillez créditer @cherylavatars (ou @cheryl)

[liannyeong]

Polar opposites

Summary: Even amidst all the anger, he would never break the one he loves.

Word count: 1446

Pairing: Jaebeom X OC

Warning(s): Angst, minor violence

A/N: It's been a long time ~ I was clearing out my drafts when I stumbled upon this. This was written in 2018, and reading it again made me go "Oh? This doesn't seem like a bad writeup?" Heh.

Jaebum thought that their love would overcome all obstacles, just like in romance movies and novels where the couple would fight and then, make up afterwards. He thought they would live happily ever after as long as they are together. That their love could stand the test of time. That their love was such a strong force that anything was possible. But this was reality, not those made-up published fantasies of a romanticist's mind.

They were cosmic stars clashing which perfectly described their first encounter. They collided as she rushed for class while he skipped it. Papers scattered everywhere and profanities escaped his lips. She scrambled for her papers while he for his cigarettes. As soon as he collected his things, his fists were clenched and ready to land a punch on his victim's face, but she had already disappeared into the corridor. And that was the first time someone ever managed to escape the wrath of the famous delinquent, Im Jaebum.

He spent his days searching for the rude girl. In Jaebum's defense, she did not utter a word of apology for bumping into him and almost getting him in trouble. When he finally got her, she had been extremely clueless about him and that bumping incident. She blinked up at him with innocent and clueless eyes that Jaebum could not even argue anymore. Nevertheless, Jaebum found her as a new target, bullied her to no end. However, she never cared about his antics and ignored his existence. She never feared him as all the other students did. But that one time when Jaebum went too far and shoved her down the corridor, she had this flame in her eyes when she met his. For the first time, Jaebum felt scared for his own life. Nothing happened though, but she started to retaliate. She got on his nerves, but funnily enough, she always managed to get away with it. 

Amidst all the animosity, there was a change of heart. It wasn't a gradual evolution of emotion. Rather, it was something that was sparked on a snap. Jaebum had wandered into the field to taunt her. But a baseball was flying towards him unbeknownst to him.

"Look out!" he had heard someone cried out before there was a whoosh sound right in front of him.

As if time stood still, he could see clearly how each strand of her hair fluttered in the wind, how her hand was outstretched right in front of his face, how the ball slammed onto her glove.

It was stupid, Jaebum thought, to feel his heart skip a beat at such incident. But it happened and Jaebum thought she caught his heart along with the ball.

Afterwards, Jaebum became a blushing fool whenever he saw her. He still disturbed her, but no longer as extreme as before. He didn't know how or when he actually mustered courage to confess but the next thing he knew, they were a couple.

Nevertheless, couple or not, they were still two very different individuals. He still preferred streetwear -- leather jackets and dyed hair -- while she preferred smart casual. She was the epitome of a successful woman: smartly dressed, with an aura of confidence. He was violent and aggressive while she was calm and collective. He was fire while she was water. His foul temper always ruined the surroundings but never her. He ruined, she fixed. He was destructive, she was constructive. He explodes, she implodes.

Because of their contrasting personalities, their love was like hot coal. It was scalding to be held, but it spread warmth to the hearts.

Nobody understood why they were together in the first place. Their closest friends always had to deal with them barging into their place with tear-stained faces or fury. None of them understood how they manage to get married and settled down together despite the endless arguments. They were not the happiest couple. They never were. Never had anyone see them smile to each other. No one understood their love.

Except them.

"We'll be fine. We'll always be," her words rang in his ears. He scoffed. Who was she to say that? Indeed, he loved her so much. But she was not him. She could not understand the pain inside. He curled himself up on his bed, letting himself be consumed by sadness and guilt. He screwed up big this time. He had it all, but his pride just had to ruin it. Tears dripped onto the bed sheets that her scent still lingered on.

His endearment for her was too overwhelming. A month had past since the incident occurred and he missed her so bad. Jaebum hoped, every second, that she would show up on the doorstep of the apartment (he no longer called it home) with her bags. But time past by and she did not come. He laughed at the wee hours of every night. He thought to himself. He deserved it. He was a jerk who ruined everything and was a screwed up person himself. He got himself drunk with the little remnants of her in the house, in his mind. He played their memories over and over - her sloppy kisses in the morning and night, her sweet voice that was his favourite song, her soft touches on his skin. Every single little detail of her was etched deeply into his memory and onto his skin.

Every night, he roamed around the streets alone. As he drowned himself in the memories, he always ended up in the neighbourhood of his in-laws. He stood at the pavement, staring at the 9th floor of the building, hoping to catch a glimpse of the woman he loved. He stood for god knows how long, not tearing his eyes away from the windows. But she never looked out of the window.

It became a habit for him to come around everyday. He was too much of a coward to knock on the door. He was too afraid to face her. He knew he was in the wrong, but he never knew why he was not brave enough to face her. He wanted her back so bad, but his body just would not move a step closer to her. She was there: she was within reach, but he just could not take the step. He missed how her silky hair would easily let his fingers card through. He missed how his hands were so much bigger than her face. He missed how perfectly fitted she was in his embrace.

Then he saw her.

He could easily identify her even if she was drowned in the crowd, even in the darkest of the night. She wore the hoodie he recognized so well: her favourite (and his too), a present from him. She stuffed her hands into the pockets of the hoodie and she strolled down the streets, her back facing him. She was all alone, and very easily he could have approached her. But he did not. He followed as she entered the convenience store. She smiled at the cashier as she paid and he died a little inside. He yearned for that blinding smile to be directed at him again. He yearned to see the skin around her eyes to crinkle and her lids to be turned to crescents upclose again. He yearned for her so much. But he could do nothing, only to love her from afar.

The famous Im Jaebum, who never fled from a fight, was in fact, a coward.

So Jaebum came home, all drunken in his own misery and agony. What started as soft sobs escalated into fury. He threw a fit. He smashed the vases, the glass furnitures. He broke all the photos they smiled happily in. He punched holes into the walls. His skin tore and his blood dripped onto the hardwood floor. His head hung low and he rested his palm against the wall for balance, before he leaned his back against the wall. He let himself slid down in agony as he cried. He did not know what was more painful: his torn skin and dripped blood or her absence. Perhaps it was both.

Or perhaps it was the wrath he incurred himself for being destructive.

Everybody knew how bad his temper was. Him throwing a fit would mean the destruction of the world. He would break everything and anything he saw.

Even amidst all the anger, he would never break the one he loves.

The only one who braved the flames of fury was the one he vowed he would never hurt.

But he broke it.

So she left and he knew he deserved it.

[gaiaicons]

⠀⠀⠀ 𓈒⠀ 𓏲𓍢    __ ׄ  ⠀ ⠀ ⠀  ( 𝓲  )⠀ ⠀ ⠀  ⁎ 𓈀 ִ   𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕤 ⠀ ⠀ ⠀   ♡⃔ .  ⠀ ⠀ ⠀  ゐ” ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ jay b ⠀⠀ ⠀   ﹏ ⠀ຯ ⠀⠀ ⠀   𑁯 🌸⠀ ִ ۫⠀ ⠀ ⠀got7 ⠀⠀ ⠀   .⠀ 𓂅

[army-in-the-stars]

Jay B x GQ Korea