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kakusu-shipping · 4 years ago

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Emile Hides - He/She

Agender - Fray/Panromantic - Asexual - Polyam

23 years old

Autistic - OCD - Major Anxiety

Age Regressor (4-8 years old)

Proship/Comship

Art Tag: Emile’s Arts

Writing Tag: Emile’s Writing

This is my Ship and Let Ship blog, where I post about ships I like, Self Ship an entirely healthy amount, write X Readers curated to me and me alone, and ramble about my F/Os in the tags of other people’s posts.

PLEASE INTERACT IF WE SHARE AN F/O!!

I love self inserting, probably more than self shipping. Writing lore and weaving myself into the plot of my favorite media is the best part to me, so please ask about my Self Inserts and their plot because I love to talk about it! And let me know if you want me to ask about yours as well because I always want to know about other’s S/Is and love sending asks!!

Very long F/O list under the cut, along with some navigational links at the bottom. Thankyou for reading.

Romantic F/Os

Koro-Sensei - Assassination Classroom (+Friendship Irina, Karasuma)

Kazuaki + Hitori - Hatoful Boyfriend (+Familial Nageki)

Toko Fukawa - Danganronpa (+Familial Masaru, Jataro, Kotoko, Nagisa)

Hifumi + Celeste - Danganronpa (+Friendship Chihiro, Taka, Mondo)

Teruteru Hanamura - Daganronpa (+Friendship Kazuichi, Sonia, Gundham)

Ryoma + Gonta - Danganronpa

Shirokuma - Danganronpa

Mario + Luigi - Super Mario

James - Pokemon the Series (+Friendship Jessie, Meowth, Wobbuffet)

Guzma - Pokemon Masters (+Friendship Kukui, Molayne)

N - Pokemon BW (+Friendship Cheren, Bianca)

Drayden - Pokemon BW

Wilkstrom - Pokemon XY

Lillie - Pokemon SuMo (+Familial Molayne, Sophocles)

Molayne + Sophocles - Pokemon SuMo (+Friendship Kuikui, Guzma)

Milo + Gordie - Pokemon SwSh (+Familial Opal, Bede, Allister)

Clavell - Pokemon SV

Salvatore - Pokemon SV

Inteleon - Pokemon SwSh (+Familial Mincinno)

Chesnaught - Pokemon XY

Armarouge (Charlos) - Pokemon SV (+Platonic Koraidon)

Ghetsis’ Hydreigon - Pokemon BW2

Ted B. Grizz - Splatoon

Jel La Fleur - Splatoon 3

Papyrus - Undertale (+Familial Sans, Gaster)

Vulkin - Undertale

Spamton - Deltarune

Swatchlings - Deltarune

Dick Gumshoe - Ace Attorney

Raymond Shields - Ace Attorney

Phineas Filch - Ace Attorney

Ginko - Mushishi (+Familial Adashino)

Muta - The Cat Returns

Scorpia - She-Ra

Bismuth - Steven Universe (+Friendship Peridot)

Eda + Raine - The Owl House

Hieronymus Bump - The Owl House

Billions and Billions - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts

Tad Mulholland - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts

Alfur - Hilda

The Snork - Moominvalley 2019

Zenyatta - Overwatch (+Familial Genji, Mondatta, Ramattra)

BOB - Overwatch (+Friendship Ashe, McCree, Bars)

Maximilien - Overwatch (+Familial Ramattra, Mondatta)

Ramattra - Overwatch (+Familial Zenyatta, Mondatta)

Lynx17 - Overwatch (+Friendship Hana, Lucio, Jamison)

Iggy - Overwatch (+Friendship Lena, Emily)

Brooster - Animal Crossing

Toshinori Yagi - My Hero Academia (+Friendship Hizashi, Aizawa, Midnight)

Taishiro Toyomitsu - My Hero Academia (+Familial Tamaki, Kirishima, Tetsutetsu, Momo)

Atsuhiro Sako + Jin Bubaigawara - My Hero Academia (+Familial Tomura, Himiko)

Ojiro + Monoma + Shinso - My Hero Academia (+Familial Nezu)

Makarov Dreyar - Fairy Tail (+Familial Erza, Juvia, Laxus)

Jackpot - Fairy Tail

Toma E. Fiore + Mato - Fairy Tail

Chushaku Kometani - Komi Can’t Communicate (+Queerplatonic Naruse)

Riri - Romantic Killer

Junta Hayami - Romantic Killer

Otsu - Manly Appetites (+metamour Minegishi)

Anna - Dead by Daylight

Sun - FNaF Security Breach (+Platonic Moon, Freddy, Gregory)

Funtime Freddy + Toy Freddy - Five Nights At Freddy’s

Leshy - Inscryption (+Familial Magnificus, P03)

Magnificus - Inscryption

Candyman - Lethal League

Gabocha - Suikoden 2 (+Familial Ridley, Boris)

Mae Browski - Night in the Woods

Viktor Humphries - Slime Rancher

Sisu - Raya and the Last Dragon

Rockhoof - My Little Pony

Tadano + Haida - Aggretsuko

Takashi Morinozuka - Ouran Highschool Host Club (+Familial Kyoya)

Harunobu Nikaidou - March comes like a lion

Franky Franklin - Spy X Family

Tetsuo Takahashi - Interviews with Monster Girls

Lynn - All Saints Street (+Familial Ira)

Skull Boy - Ruby Gloom

Al-An - Subnautica Below Zero

Peter - Your Boyfriend Game

Robot Husband - 10 Billion Husbands

Zach Binspin - Moshi Monsters

Isaac - Castlevania the Animated series

Teddy - Bob’s Burgers

York + Grendan + Rose - Drawtectives

Allhands - Drawga

Leuvis - The Promised Neverland

Theodore DaCabe/The New Prince - Chzo Mythos

Kyle + Brett - Drive Time Radio

Andras - Hell’s Library

Reed + Leigh - Middle Game

Vermont + Kass - My friend Gabe’s OCs

Platonics

Toshimitsu Kubo - Baka and Test

Chihiro + Taka + Mondo - Danganronpa

Kazuichi Soda - Danganronpa

Shirokuma - Danganronpa

Winston - Overwatch

Peridot - Steven Universe

Grime - Amphibia

Queen - Deltarune

Entrapda + Hordak - She-Ra

Skull Boy - Ruby Gloom

Snufkin - Moominvalley

Flug Syls - Villainous

Irina + Karasuma - Assassination Classroom

Hunny + Reiko - Ouran Highschool Host Club

Hizashi + Shota + Nemuri + Sekijiro + Ryo - My Hero Academia

Nezu - My Hero Academia

Fafnir + Makoto Takiya - Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid

Taurus - Fairy Tail

Gildarts Clive - Fairy Tail

Samuel - Fairy Tail

Tsukasa Kazuki - Romantic Killer

Professor Elvin Gadd - Mario

Metal Mario + Gooigi - Mario

Doctor Mario + Mr. L - Mario AU

Cheren + Bianca + Hilbert + Hilda - Pokemon BW

Jessie + Meowth + Wobbuffet - Pokemon the Series

Hau + Gladion - Pokemon SuMo

Penny + Giacomo + Mela + Atticus + Ortega + Eri - Pokemon SV

Jacq + Raifort + Tyme + Salvatore + Dendera + Miriam + Hassel + Saguaro - Pokemon SV

Koraidon - Pokemon Scarlet

Jaques - Animal Crossing

Riou + Joey + Nanami - Suikoden 2

Nina - Suikoden 2

Klaus + Sierra - Suikoden 2

Chaco + Tuta + Yuzu - Suikoden 2

Hero + Ramiel + Claire + Brevity - Hell’s Library

Goobert - Inscryption

The Mycologist - Inscryption

Anghel Higure - Hatoful Boyfriend

Shuu Iwamine - Hatoful Boyfriend

Freddy + Gregory - FNaF Security Breach

Moon - FNaF Security Breach

Bon Bon - FNaF Sister Location

Helpy - FNaF Pizzeria Simulator

Steve + Dustin + Eddie - Stranger Things

Makoto Katai - Komi Can’t Communicate

Watanuki + Domeki - XXXHolic

Liontari - Children of the Whales

Ayato Naoi - Angel Beats

Familials

Tony + Pauline - The Mario Movie (Parents)

Entei + Heatran - Pokemon (Parents)

Ginko + Adashino - Mushishi (Parents)

Toadsworth - Super Mario (Parental Figure)

Captain Craig Cuttlefish - Splatoon (Parental Figure)

Iroh - Avatar (Parental Figure)

Gaster - Undertale (Parental Figure)

Nezu - My Hero Academia (Parental Figure)

Mondatta - Overwatch (Parental Figure)

Reaper Leviathan - Subnautica (Mother)

Opal - Pokemon SwSh (Mother)

Beware - Pokemon the Series (Mother)

Alder - Pokemon BW (Father)

Ganon - Legend of Zelda The Windwaker (Father)

Mr. Grizz - Splatoon 3 (Father)

Ridley Wizen - Suikoden 2 (Father)

Columbo - Columbo (Father)

Sekijiro + Mitsuki - My Hero Academia (Siblings)

Mirai Sasaki - My Hero Academia (Twin Brother)

2P!Canada - Hetalia (Brother)

Victini - Pokemon BW (Brother)

Molayne - Pokemon SuMo (Brother)

Arven - Pokemon SV (Brother)

Boris Wizen - Suikoden 2 (Brother)

Ramattra - Overwatch (Brother in the monk sense)

Genji Shimada - Overwatch (Close enough to be Brothers)

Kyoya Ootori - Ouran Highschool Host Club (Close enough to be Brothers)

Kaoru Toudou - Baka and Test (Grandmother)

Clavell - Pokemon SV (Grandfather)

Elvin Gadd - Mario (Uncle)

Burgh - Pokemon BW (Uncle)

Drayden - Pokemon BW2 (Uncle)

Sophocles - Pokemon SuMo (Cousin)

Ingo + Emmet - Pokemon BW2 (Cousins)

Mario + Luigi - Mario (Cousins)

Gooigi + Metal Mario +Robot Mario - Mario (Cousins)

Ira - All Saints Street (Cousin)

Snufkin - Moominvalley 2019 (Nephew)

Katsuki Bakugo - My Hero Academia (Nephew)

Sonic + Tails - Sonic (Nephews)

Masaru + Jataro + Kotoko + Nagisa - Danganronpa (Adopted Kids)

Luz + Hunter + King - The Owl House (Adopted Kids)

Tamaki + Eijiro + Tetsutetsu + Momo - My Hero Academia (Adopted Kids)

Himiko + Tomura + Suichi + Dabi - My Hero Academia (Adopted Kids)

Cohozuna + Horroboros - Splatoon (Adopted Kids)

Koopalings + Bowser Jr - Super Mario (Adopted Kids)

Juvia + Erza + Lucy - Fairy Tail - (Daughters)

Bede + Allister - Pokemon SwSh (Sons)

Neito Monoma - My Hero Academia (Son)

Inasa Yoarashi - My Hero Academia (Son)

Ichiban Natsuno - Mix; Meisei Story (Son)

Ryoma Terasaka - Assassination Classroom (Son)

Berdly - Deltarune (Son)

The Collector - The Owl House (Son)

Hastur - The Baby in Yellow (Son)

Black Hat - Villainous (Son)

505 - Villainous (Grandson)

Laxus Dreyar - Fairy Tail (Grandson)

P03 - Inscrypton (Grandchild)

Drayden - Pokemon BW (Trainer)

Wilkstrom - Pokemon XY (Trainer)

Salvator - Pokemon SV (Trainer)

Weavile - Pokemon BW (Partner)

Castform (Bozu) - Pokemon SuMo (Partner)

Mincinno - Pokemon SwSh (Partner)

Armarouge (Charlos) - Pokemon SV (Partner)

Shiintonic - Pokemon the Series (Partner)

Queerplatonics/Metamours

Aguri Yukimura - Assassination Classroom

Kendo Rappa - My Hero Academia

Rikiya Yotsubashi - My Hero Academia

Mei Hatsume - My Hero Academia

Shisuto Naruse - Komi Can’t Communicate

Reedus Jonah - Fairy Tail

Minegishi - Manly Appetites

Baron Humbert von Gikkingen - The Cat Returns

Peach + Daisy - Super Mario

Bowser - Super Mario

Prince Peasely - Superstar Saga

Cheren - Pokemon BW2

Nemona - Pokemon SV

Cobb + Doc + Raddle + Petri - Animal Crossing

Tom Nook + Isabelle - Animal Crossing

Rouxls Kaard - Deltarune

Genocide Jack/Jill - Danganronpa

Genji Shimada - Overwatch

Winston - Overwatch

Crushes

Metal Mario - Mario

Emmet - Pokemon BW/BW2

Hassel - Pokemon SV

Saguaro - Pokemon SV

Ash’s Sirfetch’d - Pokemon the Series

Lady Sneasler - Pokemon

CQ Cumber - Splatoon 2

Marco Pagot - Porco Rosso

Ryutaro - Pom Poko

Baptiste - Overwatch

Doomfist - Overwatch

Roadhog - Overwatch

Sid - Suikoden 2

Richmond - Suikoden 2

Humphery - Suikoden 2

Luca Blight - Suikoden 2

Hugo Oak - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts

The Nowhere King - Centaur world

Masaru Bakugo - My Hero Academia

Katsuki Bakugo - My Hero Academia

France - Hetalia

Souichi Nishimura - Baka and Test

Nokoko Inaka - Komi Can’t Communicate

Pantherlily - Fairy Tail

Gaster - Undertale

Siren Dogen - Ace Attorney

Iroh - Avatar the Last Airbender

Shigure Souma - Fruits Basket

Kyubey - Madoka Magica

Alastor - Hazbin Hotel

Exes

Neclord - Suikoden - Ex-Husband

Monokuma - Danganronpa - Ex-Husband

Mask Seller - A Whisker Away - Ex-Husband

Redd - Animal Crossing - Ex-Husband

Alan Ituriel - Villainous - Ex-Husband

All For One - My Hero Academia - Ex-Husband

Belos - The Owl House - Ex-Boyfriend

Jacques - Animal Crossing - Ex- Boyfriend

Big Mac - My Little Pony - Ex-Boyfriend

Hizashi Yamada - My Hero Academia - Ex-Boyfriend

Thankyou very much for reading.

More stuff you should check out:

Fictional Foe List - Kin List - Ship List - Koro-Sensei’s F/O List - Fanfic Request Rules - Pro-Ship Self-Ship Discord Server

#Self ship #Self insert #F/O List #Introduction #Constantly updating so please check back #I understand it's long but please skim before interacting. Thankyou.#okay to rb #Asks always open!#Proship PLEASE interact #If we have any overlapping interests please feel free to DM me!!#Self shippers please interact #OLD Pinned post

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science-bastard · 2 years ago

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How's it like majoring in neuroscience? I love it and I'm considering it as a major but I'm unsure of it in terms of quality of life factors and actual experience and such.

i loved it! i’m not sure if your school’s program is like mine, but my experience was that we did our actual neuroscience courses at the very beginning and at the very end. in the middle were all the prerequisites (eg. molecular biology, organic chemistry) needed to understand the courses at the end.

the prerequisites can be a bit of a grind, particularly with (shudder) organic chemistry. once you get through those though, it’s much more exciting because now you can really learn some neuroscience!

if your school is similar to mine, you should be able to choose to pursue what aspects of neuroscience interest you most. for example, you could pick courses that focus on the overlap between neuroscience and psychology, neuroscience and computer science, the biological aspect of neuroscience, etc. it’s a broad and flexible major.

it is a good deal of work and requires decent time management skills. i personally have a hard time with executive dysfunction, but i set up a spreadsheet every week with all the stuff i had to do. it wasn’t perfect, and i did slip up plenty, but it was good enough.

as for getting jobs, it will be difficult with an undergrad degree alone. you pretty much have to get at least a masters in order to get a good job in the neuroscience field. please take this part with a grain of salt as i am young and inexperienced and likely to not have knowledge that someone older might. this is not to say that you shouldn’t do neuroscience, though: just something to be aware of.

if you do pursue a master’s or a phd, i would recommend taking a gap year (or maybe two) between undergrad and graduate school. i feel it’s something i really need since i’m burnt out after undergrad, but this might not be applicable for you. i’m searching for jobs in the meantime so i can get experience and get some money to pay for a grad program.

i’m not really sure what else to say on this, but if you or anyone else have any questions about majoring in neuroscience, feel free to dm me!

#neuro major #antiscarecrowism #research inquiry

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asmywhimseytakesme · 4 years ago

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Hi, I just saw your blog and I have to ask; do you have any recommendations for people who really, really enjoyed the Murderbot Diaries? Im kinda obsessed with it

Hi @extra-plus-ordinary ! I am so flattered to be asked this because I LOVE giving recommendations.

The first thing I’ll say is, there is a very active Murderbot discord server and if you aren’t in it send me a dm and I’ll get you a link! The lovely folks there can probably give you lots more recommendations than me. I’ll admit I haven’t been on there much lately because life be like that sometimes, but you can bet I’ll be active there plenty when the next Murderbot book comes out in a few months! The folks there also found me links to a couple Murderbot short stories that you should absolutely check out if you haven’t yet.

I have to admit, my first thought on getting this ask is... there isn’t anything else quite like Murderbot! Sometimes all you want is more Murderbot and we don’t have any (yet). The first time I finished the series I started over again at the beginning because all I wanted was More Murderbot Please. It took me awhile to be in the mood for anything else. I absolutely recommend indulging that mood because personally, when all I want is Just This Book, I end up disliking anything else I try to read, even when I normally would like it. But! If you are in the mood to try something a bit different with perhaps some overlapping appeal, let me offer a few suggestions:

The Queens Thief series by Megan Whalen Turner

I have to mention this first because it’s fans of THIS series that got me to read Murderbot. Also I’ve been obsessed with these books since I was a teen. Similarities between the series include:

Sarcastic first person narration—this is mostly just in the first book of the series, The Thief. If you, like me, fell in love with Murderbot because of its voice, give this book a try. Gen is a different narrator in many ways, but I find the appeal similar. There are also some similar character dynamics and interactions with a group gradually getting to know a character they previously underestimated, and forming strong friendships over the course of the series.

However, I will note that The Thief is notably different from the rest of the series in tone and pacing, and some people find it boring. That was not my experience, but many recommend starting the series with the second book.

The second book has a character that I feel is similar to Murderbot on many levels, but I don’t want to say much more about it because SPOILERS. Actually I don’t want to say any more about the series at all because it’s really best to just go in and experience it for yourself. Take my word for it—many people love both series, there is lots of crossover appeal.

The Mandalorian tv series

Ok I feel kinda dumb mentioning this because I feel like everyone’s probably heard of this show by now and has already decided whether they’re gonna watch it. I mean, it’s STAR WARS. So I’ll be brief here, but I really feel like Mando and Murderbot have a LOT in common and would get along really well, and people drawn to one of these characters might also like the other. Murderbot wishes he had as good an excuse as Mando for keeping a helmet on at all times. They’re both similarly good at their jobs (which involve fighting), and end up coming to care for characters weaker and less experienced than themselves. They then put themselves on the line to protect their new Found Family, while steadfastly refusing to admit that they have any feelings whatsoever. Also, so far? No romantic pairings. Murderbot would approve. There are more comparisons I could make but I’ll stop....So yeah, if for some reason you haven’t given The Mandalorian a try.... do it.

Digger by Ursula Vernon

Ok, so the cool thing about this recommendation (aside from the fact that it’s a super amazing story, which I’ll talk more about in a bit) is you can read the WHOLE THING. FOR FREE. RIGHT NOW. Don’t have to put it on hold at the library, don’t have to order it and wait for it to come in the mail, don’t have to track it down in a used bookstore. ITS ALL FREE: http://diggercomic.com/blog/2007/02/01/wombat1-gnorf/

That link should take you to the first page of the comic.

The first comparison I’ll make here is the VOICE. Digger has a first person funny/sarcastic voice that reminds me a LOT a of Murderbot. Different, of course, but..., I think Murderbot would really like Digger. She would be a good client. Practical, tries to stay safe and make good decisions, and she would 100% get Murderbot’s sense of humor. She gets thrown into a crazy magical world and takes it all in stride, making plenty of friends she’s ready to defend with her life.

Yeah, Murderbot would like Digger.

I’d go on, but seriously—did you forget I just said THE WHOLE THING IS FREE TO READ ONLINE so just.... go start reading it and get a taste for it yourself.

http://diggercomic.com/blog/2007/02/01/wombat1-gnorf/

The Vorkosigan Saga

This is a big one that will keep you occupied for awhile! I don’t remember how many books are in the series... 20 maybe? I don’t even know. This is the series I re read when I was coming off my Murderbot high a few months back, because in some ways it has a similar vibe.

Anyway, this is another Space Drama that explores some interesting potential economics, politics, and conflicts of a future of planets linked by wormholes. Some of the planets have a more Corporation Rim feel, others are like Preservation, with many others thrown in the mix. The main character, Miles Vorkosigan... he would love Murderbot. He’d recruit it on the spot—a competent person who shows initiative? Wonderful! On the other hand, Murderbot would HATE Miles.... no sense of self preservation, barreling into problems with no clear plan of how to get out... he would drive Murderbot absolutely crazy.

Personally, I started reading the series with The Warriors Apprentice, and that’s where I recommend starting. However technically Shards of Honor, which tells the story of Miles’ parents and how they met, is the first book chronologically.

The Winter Prince by Elizabeth Wein

This is a very short novel (so if the Murderbot novella length worked for you, give this a try). It’s a gripping take on Arthurian Legend told from the point of view of Medraut (Mordred). Medraut reminds me of Murderbot in many ways—he feels unworthy of love because of what he is, wrestling with a violent past and trying to be better, struggling to know what to do when he is loved by people who he doesn’t think should love him. Also, like All Systems Red, his narrative is addressed to a specific person, which affects how the story is read.

So those are just a few books/series I recommend for Murderbot fans! And everyone, really, because these are all excellent because my taste is impeccable ;-).

I hope there is something here to tide you over til the next Murderbot book comes out @extra-plus-ordinary 😁

#Murderbot #Murderbot diaries #queens thief #Vorkosigan saga #Mandalorian #the winter prince #digger comic

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itstjhammond · 3 years ago

Text

Please read before interacting!

Hello and welcome!

This is a roleplay blog for TJ Hammond from the series Political Animals. I would appreciate if you would read through this post, it’s long so I’ve put the info below a cut, but some important points are as follows:

NO MINORS. 21+ ONLY PLEASE.

No hate, racism, homophobia, sexism, etc. Basically, don’t be a dick.

Please read below for my limits and triggers, etc.

Asks and DM’s are open, please message me to discuss storylines, rp in DM’s, NSFW on dash, etc.

Mod is 30+

About the Blog

This is a roleplay blog. I make posts and interact with others as TJ, and also include aesthetic posts as if TJ was running this blog. I do this for fun, so please leave the drama and hate at the door.

Absolutely no minors. This blog is 21+ only. If you are underage, do not follow me, do not interact with me. It’s uncomfortable for me. This blog contains mature subject matter that children should not be interacting with. Please respect this.

Mature subject matter will include drugs, alcohol and sexual situations. There is a potential for discussion about suicide, etc, due to TJ’s canon background. I will tag for triggers as best as I can.

About the Mod

The mod of this blog is 30+

The mod works full time and has obligations outside of this blog. Please be patient!

About TJ

The events of this blog take place after the events of Political Animals

As such, I write TJ as having moved away to live his own life out of the spotlight and away from the drama surrounding his family.

Some of his interests now include piano, photography and books/history.

I play TJ as gay. An exception to this is an AU with the lovely @bibbidibobbidibucky where TJ is bi.

Interactions

Asks and DM’s are open, I’m okay with rping through DM’s, shoot me a message and we can discuss details!

Anonymous asks are SFW only unless you send me a DM to confirm you are 21+. Innuendo is totally fine and acceptable!

Current anon emojis: 🐠, 🦋, 🦄, 🕳️

NSFW situations are allowed on dash, but I do have some preferences as to what I like to do on dash. Message me to discuss if you’re interested!

Please no asks about self harm or suicide, or asking for real life advice.

Limits/Triggers

Non-con

Sexual assault/rape

Stalking

Heavy degredation

DD/lg, DD/lb

Abuse

Pregnancy/Children

Acceptable Kinks

Light bondage

Light daddy/mommy kink (ie: as a title for partners during sexual situations)

Light dom/sub

Choking, spanking, hair pulling, etc

A/B/O-verse

Breeding kink

Praise kink

This is not an exhaustive list, please message me to discuss anything that might not be listed!

Tagging

Commonly used tags:

#tj plays - rp posts and interactions

#tj answers - answering asks

#tj’s muse - aesthetic posts and things that give me TJ vibes

#tj’s playlist - music, songs, playlists, etc

#mod stuff - mod posts, announcements, etc

Ongoing Interactions

These, along with asks, are all separate storylines that don't overlap. They are very important to me, and I ask that you please respect my partners!

#ben • #my other half - TJ’s main storyline with @ben-curtis-anon

#my girl • #cute dates with talley - an AU storyline with @bibbidibobbidibucky

#daddy zemo - refers to @ask-sugardaddy-zemo

#tsb📸🎸👻 - an AU with @ben-curtis-anon and @rockstarsteve-anon

This is a long post, I know, but I wanted to include as much info as possible. Please feel free to DM me if you have any questions ❤

** Last but not least, a big thank you to @happygowriting for the gorgeous banner! **

#mod stuff #info post #please read #itstjhammond #tj's mod #tj hammond rp #tj hammond roleplay

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frostsinth · 4 years ago

Text

Royal Flush - Pt. 1

The prologue to this story can be found HERE. I plan to redo/redesign the picture at some point. UPDATE: Redid the picture HERE

A new story (because fuck me, that’s why). This time between a Goblin King, and a young human Prince. Something new and fresh I hope you will all fancy. And hopefully a line up for another fic I have planned for the future.

As always, please visit my MasterList to see my other works, and feel free to BuyMeACoffee while you are there. If you have any prompts, ideas, thoughts, or insane ramblings, I love to hear from you. Please send me all the notes, tags, asks, or DMs your little hearts desire.

Enjoy!

“… Nikostratus, I… I know you are ...conflicted,” He started, and I felt my blood run hot again at his words, “But that is no reason-”

“My life is doomed to misery, regardless of what end,” I snapped at him, anger lacing every word, cutting him off, “… At least this way, Morgana will have a chance at finding happiness.”

He fell silent, his face a mask of horror, and I turned back to face the Goblin King. Stepping forward, I placed one arm over my chest, then bent at the waist. Bowing deeply to him.

“Your Majesty, I agree to your proposal.”

“I am humbled, and honored,” The Goblin King replied, and I could hear the smirk in his voice, even as I kept my eyes on the ground beneath me. “Come, we can discuss the details further in my private study… alone.”

I stiffened slightly at his request. But realized that the word he stressed was less suggestive and more… cold? As I slowly raised from my bow, I saw his scarlet eyes glaring harshly over my shoulder. I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck prickling, and tightened my jaw. Resisting the urge to look back at my guard. Knowing now exactly whom that tone had been for and not imagining I would enjoy the expression waiting behind me.

“As you wish, Your Majesty.”

The King gestured for me to follow him, leading the way across the floor to a door set into the side of the great chamber. With my will steeled, I followed after. If Gareth attempted to follow as well, I did not know. Nor what would become of him, left alone upon my exit with the Goblin King. And with the anger at his words still hot in my blood at that moment, I didn’t care.

“Thank you, Your Majesty.” I tried not to mumble as he held the door open for me.

“Please, call me Grier. Assuming all goes well, we are to be married soon, after all.” I couldn’t help but wince at the word, and my mouth felt dry. I saw his scarlet eyes flicker to me at their corners. “And what are you comfortable with being called, Your Highness?”

I hesitated, unable to resist flinching ever so slightly as the door clunked closed behind us. “My name is Nikostratus, if it pleases you, Your Majesty.”

“Grier.” He corrected, and led the way down the smaller side hallway. I hardly took notice of my surroundings, feeling hollow and numb. “And it matters not if it pleases me. It is your name, no? Though I will admit it is a bit of a mouthful.”

I didn’t answer. I wasn’t sure how to answer. The weight of it all was suddenly dropping onto me, and I felt my palms clasped behind my back growing sweaty. I swallowed, tightening my jaw. There was still much to discuss before the arrangement could be finalized. I had to keep my head level, for the sake of my people. I could not let the goblins take more than an inch in negotiations. Couldn’t let myself be razzled by whatever life I had just signed myself up for. It was entirely possible that had been his intent! Perhaps the entire ‘marriage’ would be an endless attempt to manipulate me into breaking; to gain the upper hand. Just how far would a goblin be willing to go for one of their pranks? An arranged marriage certainly didn’t seem out of that scope. Would it lead up to the ceremony? Beyond?

“Do you have any other names you like to go by?” He pressed, opening a grand carved oak door and standing back to allow me to enter first. I stiffened, but nodded appreciatively and stepped past him as quickly as I could. “A nickname? Or perhaps you wouldn’t mind if I choose a term of endearment for you?” His voice was light and teasing, but it made a chill run down my spine. “Perhaps ‘sweetheart’ or ‘dear’. I have always liked the term ‘pet’, though I believe it would be ill suited for our… situation.”

I swallowed hard again, grinding my teeth quietly as I stopped before the grand desk in the room. I turned my head slightly to watch him saunter around to the other side after closing the large door behind himself.

“I prefer Nikostratus.” I hoped my voice didn’t sound too dry.

His crooked smirk didn’t lighten the burden of my nerves, nor allow me any relief from the notion this whole mess was simply some ploy. Some elaborate goblin mischief. But he didn’t sit in the ornate chair behind the desk as I had anticipated. Instead, he gathered up an inkwell, a handful of quills, and a roll of parchment and brought it over to the overly plush chairs set before the grand fireplace of the room.

I used that moment to take stock of the study for the first time since entering. It was large, with tall stone bookshelves filled to bursting with old tomes. The smell of their ancient parchment as well as the smoke from the fire in the large fireplace suffused the room. There were assorted knick knacks dotting every available surface, from a golden astrolabe to a pristinely painted globe and even a silver sundial propped against one wall. Aside from the huge desk and plush pair of armchairs, there was a small marble table before the fire, and a silver cart piled with various shaped decanters and glasses. The entire room was disheveled and cluttered, with heaps of parchments and quills strewn about, tomes left half opened with numerous different things from ribbons to dried flowers tucked between their pages, and the evidence of projects started but never completed.

The study was also vehemently colored, with no two fabrics matching another. There were glittering crystalline mobiles and diagrams and draped scarves dangling from the rafters. Various pillows in different shapes, colors, and sizes pooled off the armchairs onto the floor which was covered with several overlapping carpets that absolutely had no unifying color scheme. It was overwhelming, and I couldn’t help but cast an apprehensive eye about as he settled in one of the two chairs facing each other.

“Are you hungry?” He offered, simply sweeping whatever had been on the small marble table onto the floor with a clatter to make space for his parchment and quills. “Perhaps some tea? I believe I have heard humans like tea.”

It took me a breath to realize he had spoken to me. When his red eyes lifted to my face, I straightened sharply, but shook my head.

“No, Your Majesty, thank you.”

He scoffed, waving one green skinned hand. “Grier.” He corrected me again. “Now sit. We have much to discuss if we want to have a proper marriage contract drawn up tonight.”

I let out my breath slowly between tight lips. I could do this. Write up a marriage contract. A peace contract, rather. I knew how to negotiate. How to write contracts. And I needed to make sure the terms were in my kingdom’s best interest. Slowly, I walked over, glancing down at the plush chair facing his briefly before lowering myself into it. I sat at the very edge so as not to disturb the large quantity of odd shaped pillows there. This would be easier if I just was careful not to remember it was my marriage contract.

“Now then, down to business,” He drew up his quill, scribbling a long, over flourished sentence at the top of the parchment. “And I would urge you to speak your mind here, my young Prince. We must be able to forgo formalities and niceties if we are to complete a formidable and agreeable contract.” He dabbed a note. “As discussed, removal of my soldiers from your kingdom is first.”

I nodded, eyeing him as his long fingers deftly maneuvered the quill into forming short, neat little letters. “We will need to redefine the borders between the two kingdoms as well.”

One thin eyebrow raised, and he glanced up at me through pale lashes. “However do you mean?”

I placed my hands on my knees, back still ramrod straight. “The skirmishes over the last decade have allowed disputed territories to fall into your control. We would need them returned.” I cocked my head ever so slightly to the side. “As a sign of your good faith.”

He tsked, but seemed amused. “You will find I have treated your citizens quite admirably while they were beneath my occupation.” His quill scratched across the page. “Perhaps they may not wish to return.”

I paused, but decided it was just an effort on his part to get a rise out of me. “Never-the-less… They will be returned. And our borders will become defined and respected.”

A soft ‘hrumph’, and he leaned back in his chair, re-reading what he had just written. “Very well… though perhaps I was under the misinformation that our kingdoms would become united with our marriage? Forming into one?”

I resisted the urge to flinch at his words, feeling my knuckles clench slightly with the effort. “A kingdom cannot have two Kings. Royal marriages unify countries, but they do not become a single kingdom. Borders are open, allowing for trade and travel ease for citizens, as well as lower taxes for goods produced.” My voice sounded hollow and distant, even to my own ears. “There is also the expectation of allied forces, should a conflict arise for either kingdom.”

“My kingdom will.” He mused, penning a note.

I blinked. “Excuse me?”

“Have two Kings,” He glanced up at me, his crooked smirk forming again, “My Kingdom will. Unless I have your future title wrong. Would you perhaps remain a Prince by human customs?”

I felt heat rising around the edge of the collar of my shirt. “The title is not important.”

The goblin sat up taller in his seat. “It is important.” He insisted. “I want to be sure you, as well as your people, are comfortable with all terms of this contract. These are terms of peace, not surrender.”

Then why doesn’t it feel that way? I wondered quietly, but otherwise didn’t comment further. Clamping my lips shut. I reminded myself again why I was doing this; for my people. For Morgana. He waited for me to speak for a moment, his red eyes locked on my face. For my part, I made a point to focus on the fireplace.

“Alright,” He relented finally, impatient, “You tell me. What title would you have? If this was a contract between humans, hm?” He twirled the quill nimbly between his fingers. “I want to be sure to use the proper terms, so there is no confusion.”

My hands slowly curled into fists on my knees. “The title is not important.”

He sighed impatiently. “Oh come now. If it’s not important, then it should be simple enough to answer, yes?” He twirled the quill again, and my eyes darted to it from their corners. “If this was a marriage contract between a human Prince and a human King, upon their marriage, what title-”

“There is no such thing,” I snapped, cutting him off as my temper flared, “Of a marriage between a Prince and a King. It does not matter what title you choose, the concept is abhorrent to my people, and the marriage will never-” I stopped short, closing my eyes and slowly letting my breath out through my nose. “...While it will be accepted as a valid and legally binding contract of peace… It will never be accepted as a true marriage.”

A tense silence stretched between us, and for a long moment, I feared I had ruined everything. That he would no longer feel an arranged marriage between us would hold the same weight. I felt the sinking dread that the loss of my temper had doomed my sweet little sister. Or perhaps my entire kingdom. For certainly such a slight would never have been permitted in our court. A proposed marriage contract that was not a recognized marriage? Unacceptable. I sat with my eyes closed, my lips in a tight line, trying to steady my breathing. To regain my composure.

“... If I have misjudged you,” He began slowly, his previous arrogance and teasing gone from his tone, “... Or if I have been misinformed as to your… preferences...” I may have winced at the words, but I was clenched far too tight to notice “-We do not have to go forward with this contract. I will not sign anything without the clear consent of both parties.”

I slowly opened my eyes, keeping them firmly focused on the table beside me. Not daring to lift my gaze to his, though I felt his own boring into my skull. He sat silently, perhaps expecting an answer. But I did not have the strength to give it just yet. My fists were clenched so tight they were nearly white. For all his words… he didn’t seem to understand. There were no other options for me. We had to go forward with this contract. For the sake of everything I held dear. And yet, to do so meant … I struggled to keep my growing emotions in check.

“... I will expect this to be a marriage,” He informed me after the brief pause, his tone growing harsh, almost angry, “With all things that come with that. Including its consummation.” I did wince now, and internally kicked myself for doing so. “And I will not enter into a marriage where I am required to rape my partner-”

“Enough.” I boldly cut him off again, shaking my head. My voice quivering with my own anger at his vulgar yet casual language regarding such an intimate topic.

He paused again, giving me another moment to take a few deep breaths to calm my nerves. His voice, when he did speak again, was flat, but firm. And I recognized its authoritative nature. I was reminded again why this man, short of all his other faults and no matter his species, was a King of a powerful people.

“Am I wrong, Prince Nikostratus, in my judgement of you?”

I felt as a child, being scolded by their elder, and my throat was dry for that sake alone. I would have to admit it, I realized. I would have to admit it out loud, for the first time in my life. I would have to face a reality I had consigned myself to deny and carry with me to my grave. I was a Prince, after all. And a secondborn Prince at that. I would never have the power or freedom to act as I wanted; I would always be held to the responsibility of my station. The necessities of my kingdom. And despite everything, despite the deep longing I had always held to be able to love whomever I wished… I found my lips faltering to form the words.

Part of me believed it was a trick still. Some long, drawn out plan of humiliation. Of shame. Of deceit meant to ruin my honor and reputation among my people. To expose me to my family. I felt the familiar rage bubbling up inside me, and clenched my jaw in an effort to quell it. All the while, I felt his red eyes still staring at me. Waiting for the answer I had prepared myself never to give.

“... Make no mistake, Your Majesty,” I began slowly, my voice soft but hard, “If there is one thing I am sure of in this world… it is that I love my little sister with every fiber of my being. And I would do everything in my power to protect her from the evils of this world.” Carefully, I raised my gaze to meet his. “Whatever face that may take.” He opened his mouth, but I jerked my hand sharply up to keep him from speaking, lest I lose my nerve. “I understand what I am agreeing to. I understand fully what will be... expected of me. And whatever my… “ I dropped off, struggling to find what I wanted to say. I winced at the first word that came to mind, for I hated it most of all. But spat it out bitterly none-the-less. “... conflictions may be, I enter this contract with full consent. I beg your indulgence that this is enough for you for now.”

I was proud that I never broke eye contact with him as I spoke. His startlingly red eyes watched me unblinkingly, and even as I finished, he stared. Turning my words over in his head. I felt sweat beading at the base of my neck, but maintained his gaze. Stubbornly resisting the urge to turn away or drop my eyes from his.

“If I hear what you’re saying in regards to your people,” He returned finally, and I let out a little gust of air I didn’t know I had been holding, “Then I can hardly blame you for struggling to… accept our situation, such as it is.” He drummed his fingertips on the arm of his chair. “But you are sure? Once we move forward with this contract, there will be no turning back.”

I nodded without hesitation, and I saw his smirk return to the corners of his mouth. “I am sure.”

“You will be King Consort, then,” He replied, picking up his quill again, “As is the custom for my people.” He scribbled a few lines quickly before continuing. “Your authority will be more or less equal to mine, but the difference in title allows for differentiation when referring to us.” His long nose twitched as his smirk returned to its full strength. “Pronouns can be tricky in such situations.”

“...I can imagine” I said dryly, finally letting my gaze drop.

“And since you are sure, perhaps we should move on to the more domestic qualities of the contract, yes? Now, how many children?”

I blinked stupidly, my eyes jumping back up to him in surprise. “...Eh?”

“How many children?” His voice was light and cheery, and I saw the mischievous glint in his eyes that left me quite annoyed. “I’ve always wanted a large family, but I am flexible on the matter.”

“...You’re joking.”

“Hardly.” He twirled the quill again. “As King, I am expected to provide an heir. There are several options available to us, but it is best we make these decisions now. Just to be certain we are on the same page and have the same expectations. It avoids arguments down the line.”

I struggled to keep my composure, and saw his smirk grow by a few molars at the sight. “What… what are the options?”

“Well, we could adopt, of course.” He mused, tapping one long finger against his angular chin. “Or we could hire a surrogate.”

“Surrogate?” I echoed, dumb founded. I had never heard of such a term before.

He nodded, eyes shimmering with delight. “Yes! A female to carry our offspring. Typically of good stock; the screening process is quite vigorous. We can each lay with her and let the die be cast in whatever way it may land. Or, with your consent, I will impregnate her-”

“Wh-whichever.” I blurted quickly, feeling my face growing hot. I hated how easily he managed to keep me off balanced, and each slip of my composure left me feeling guiltier than the last and more determined to maintain it.

“Ah, but then there is of course the magical route.” He continued, almost gleefully ignoring my reaction to the less savory parts of the second option which had the blush rising to my cheekbones despite my efforts.

“The… the what?”

“The magical route.” He repeated, steepling his hands together with a grin. “A simple, temporary spell that allows one of us to impregnate the other and carry our progeny to term-”

“You’re making that up!” I snapped despite myself, feeling my face flush even more.

He pretended to look much more appalled than I was certain he was. “I would never! Producing an heir is a very important matter which I take with the utmost seriousness!”

I struggled again to return to the stoic face of a stately Prince I had perfected over the course of my life. But his words had my thoughts reeling, and I couldn’t help my mouth dropping open slightly. Looking pleased with himself, he stood, walking over to the cart of drinks.

“I am parched. Would you like something? Or I can send for tea if you prefer?”

I managed to close my mouth, staring at the seat he had vacated for a long moment. I heard the clinking of glass, and cleared my suddenly dry throat.

“...Brandy. If you have it.” I rasped, my voice strained.

His laughter was almost melodic, and I heard the continued clinks as he dolled out a second glass. “Excellent choice, my young Prince.” He purred, returning with both drinks in hand. “I see we are a perfect match on that front.”

I took the glass numbly, sniffing the amber liquid instinctually. I was surprised to find it seemed of higher quality, and sipped it experimentally. Grier took his seat once more, crossing one leg over the top of the other.

“Now, which method do you prefer?” He mused, taking a sip from his own glass.

I nearly choked on my second sip, and sputtered momentarily. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye to see his crooked grin. I shook my head, swallowing the burning liquid.

“...Umm, wh-whichever.” I almost winced at the improperness of my stuttering speech, gritting my teeth.

He raised one slender eyebrow, smirking. “Even the third? I hear it is quite the experience.”

I took another hurried sip of the brandy. “...Maybe not that one.”

He laughed again, and I felt my ears burning. I turned, focusing on the fire, watching the flames lick and pop. Trying to ignore the feeling of his eyes on me. Trying to distance myself from the idea of raising children of all things with this creature sat across from me. He’s just trying to get a rise from you, I told myself. Always, constantly. Poking and prodding. Trying to gain the upper hand in negotiations. Amused by my discomfort.

“We’ll write a ‘to be determined’ for now.” He declared, picking up the quill once more. “But we’ll discuss it again later.”

I snuck a peek at him while he wrote, studying him out the corner of my eye. His wild hair fell about his sharp features, and the way the light hit his green-grey skin it seemed almost warm to the eye. I found myself wondering at the thought of spending a life with him. Wondered what it would be like beyond this room. Beyond this evening. I took another steadying sip of brandy, pretending my hand wouldn’t be shaking if it hadn’t held the glass.

“How many then?” He pressed, glancing up at me. “I believe six is a good number. Even, but manageable. Yes?”

I looked down at the amber liquid in my hands. “I-I…” I dropped off, shaking my head, steadying my voice, “I had never thought about it.”

“Why ever not?” He quipped, dipping the tip to scribble another note.

I didn’t answer him, but felt my brow furrow. Of course, the real reason was because I had never expected to be able to choose. Had never expected to be married, and if I was, I would be grateful to be able to conceive at all. My marriage prospects had always been slim; the likelihood was of me being paired with a widowed partner whose late husband’s lands were in dispute, or an elderly monarch whose wealth would be our greatest asset. Whatever would best benefit the Kingdom. It didn’t matter the partner, not like my older brother’s, just what she would bring to the table. Therefore, planning children had simply never really been a thought of mine. And now that it was? I wasn’t sure what to think of it. Had no basis for what I wanted. Had no basis for what would be expected of me as a parent, nor how I would feel being so fully responsible for another life. My lips tightened, and I found myself at a loss for words again.

“Hmmm. Six it is then. But we’ll see where the tides take us when the time comes.” I almost sighed with relief that he let the matter go. A few more soft scratches. “Alright, lovers is next on my list.”

Again, I sputtered, nearly choking on the brandy halfway down my throat. “Lovers??”

He nodded, looking up at me with a coy twist on his thin lips. “Yes. Traditionally, human Kings take lovers I believe. But goblins tend to be monogamous in marriage, unless previously agreed before the ceremony. Do you wish to be allowed to take lovers?”

Again, it was simply not something I had ever considered. Nor had the foggiest notion of how to approach. Certainly it was not a concept boldly discussed in any capacity, regardless of the fact that it was common knowledge. High society dictated such things be carefully and politely ignored. Not discussed over a marriage contract. He waited, tapping his finger against the quill. Watching my face. I swore he was enjoying himself.

I shook my head. “I… I have no desire to…” I cleared my throat, then shook my head again.

He leaned forward, propping his chin on his slender fingers. Coy smirk playing about his lips. “You would remain completely faithful to me?” He purred, looking at me through his pale lashes. “I have no qualms allowing you to take lovers if it would make you more comfortable.”

I snorted faintly, burying it in my glass as I took another sip. As if anything about this conversation was likely to end with me being comfortable. The drink was already almost gone, and I could feel its effects curling tenderly about my insides. Warming my stomach, tickling the edges of my mind. I pretended it was the brandy making my cheekbones and neck flush, rather than the conversation. It was hard to separate the contract from myself when the bastard kept asking such personal questions.

“Monogamous.” I muttered finally, keeping my gaze fixed on my lap, even though it made no sense. My point was clear. After all, if I was going to do this marriage thing, I was going to do it right. Consign myself to my misery. And certainly not give this man any further ammunition against me in the future. Better to go it alone, as I always had.

His faint chuckle had me stiffening, but I pushed aside my discomfort. Reminding myself what this was all for. His quill scratched audibly across the page.

“Alright then, living quarters. Combined or separate?”

I nearly groaned. Another personal question? I ran my thumb over the lip of my glass. “Why is it necessary for that to be in the contract?” I grumbled, barely managing to conceal my irritation with his prying.

He tsked me, taking a deep sip of his own drink before flicking the feather of the quill at me pointedly. “We are embarking on a cross-cultural experiment, my young Prince. It is important all things be discussed. To avoid undue arguments and discontent down the line. No matter how trivial it may seem now.”

I almost snorted again but shook my head instead. “Kings and Queens traditionally have separate quarters.” I mumbled distantly. Would that notion matter in this instance?

“Really?” Breathed Grier, returning the quill to the inkwell and picking up his glass again. “I had heard such, but believed it more a formality than a common practice. How are conjugal visits managed?”

I glanced up at him, trying to discern if he was prying again. Trying to raise my ire. But he seemed genuinely curious, his red eyes sparkling in the firelight. I sighed deeply, raising one hand and rubbing at my brow.

“The Queen usually visits the King’s chambers regularly, until she becomes pregnant.”

“And after?”

I shrugged, raking my brain to remember how it had been between my own parents. “... Once an heir is produced, the visits are… less regular…” Likely because they were merely duty and obligation before. And once the coupling had produced a child? The King could return to his whores and the Queen to whatever her fancies.

He ran his finger over his lip, leaning back in his chair. “How absolutely odd. No wonder your people are so sexually repressed. You never see one another.”

Perhaps it was the now empty glass in my hand. Perhaps it was the fatigue from the long journey, or the emotional stress from the last few hours. But his words made me snort loudly, my facade of stoic calm dropping long enough to let a few short, soft laughs peter from my mouth.

When I looked over at him, he looked surprised. His eyes were wide, his slender brows high. My laughter faded, and I cleared my throat quickly, straightening.

“My apologies, Your Majesty, that was-”

“Please,” He stopped me again, reaching out one hand, “Just Grier. No ’Your Majesty’. And do not apologize.” He grinned, and for the first time, it seemed actually genuine rather than teasing or coy. “I am glad to see you are at least capable of laughter… Though I have yet to see you smile.” His smirk returned, and his eyes became playful. “I am not certain you know how.”

I rolled my eyes slightly, and a small scowl came over my lips. But I found myself not as annoyed as I had been at his teasing. I heard him stand, and his hand gently reached out and took my glass. I felt my heart skip a beat, though I berated myself for the foolishness as he returned to the cart with both.

He held my gaze for a moment too long as he passed me back my refilled glass, and I felt heat creeping up my neck. But I was careful to keep my face a careful mask of stoic indifference. It had been foolish of me to allow him to gain the upper hand thus far in negotiations. To let him put me constantly on edge with trivial questions that had nothing to do with the long term prosperity for my people. I was determined not to allow it to happen again.

Grier took his seat once more, swirling the brandy in his glass and taking a slow sip. Still, he watched me with those startling scarlet eyes. I felt my lips curving into a slight frown, but waited. As King, he should always be the one to speak first. It was not my place to address him unless I was first addressed. Perhaps he knew this, which is why he declined to speak. Instead fixing me with his unnerving gaze. Or, another part of me reasoned, perhaps he did not. Perhaps goblins did not have this custom, and he was waiting for me to speak first. As the guest. In which case, it was disrespectful for me not to speak.

I was still torn, debating which line of etiquette we were following, when he leaned forward in his chair and rested his elbows on his knees. My eyes flicked back to him at the movement, the only hint to my surprise.

“I find I am curious about you, Prince Nikostratus,” He said, sly smirk still dancing about his lips, “In truth, I did not expect you to agree to such an arrangement as this. And when you did, I was certain I would be able to call your bluff quickly.” My grip on my glass tightened, but I remained otherwise unmoved outwardly. “And if we are being completely honest, which I believe we should be, I originally proposed it to force you to trade your little sister for the sake of your own comfort and pride.”

I felt a chill run down my spine at his words, and my eyes narrowed sharply. “My sister?”

His expression faltered at the iciness of my tone, and even his smile shrank a few inches. The goblin quickly raised one hand. “Not for any untoward reason, I can assure you. More to gauge who you are as a person.”

I considered him, my gaze still chilled. A sinking feeling had grabbed hold of my nerves and dragged down the sensation from my fingertips with it. Leaving a tingling numbness slowly spreading through my body.

“Then you do not intend to keep this contract, Your Majesty?”

He chuckled nervously, finally dropping those scarlet eyes in the face of my cold, growing rage. “I feel we have regressed-”

“On the contrary,” I interrupted, eager to exploit his sudden off balanceness as he had so readily exploited mine, “I feel we have finally come to the end.” I started to stand, reaching out to place my glass on the table. “If you are quite done wasting my time, Your Majesty, I will return when you are ready to discuss a real contract for peace, rather than whatever sham you have attempted to ply onto me thus far.”

“This was not any kind of deception-” He jumped to his feet as I stood, quickly skirting over as if to block my path. “Your Highness, please-” I moved to step around him “-Prince Nikostratus!”

I froze, then looked down at him, his hand firmly clamped on my arm. His pronounced brow was knotted, his scarlet eyes narrowed. I found his grip surprisingly strong, despite his diminutive stature. The goblin was about a foot shorter than me, but it was a fact easily forgettable considering the square of his shoulders and the determined way he set his angular jaw.

We stayed like that for a breath, staring at each other. I fixed the King with as cold a glare as I could manage, and I saw him searching my face for a long, quiet moment. I wasn’t sure what he was looking for, but I was careful to keep up my stoney visage to be sure he would never find it.

“I have spoken too brashly,” He interjected finally, his voice soft, “And have thus insulted you… Which was far from my intent.” He gestured with his other hand, back to the arm chairs. “Please, Your Highness, allow me a moment to explain myself.”

I glanced back over my shoulder at the chairs, and my lips pinched tighter together in displeasure at the idea of returning. Disgust rolled in my gut, and I felt bile rising in my throat. But I worked hard to cool my anger. Reminding myself that whatever monster I was dealing with, I had to best him at his game. For everything I had left behind, and for everything that may yet lay before me. And perhaps, for the first time since we had met, I had him on the defense. It might be best to keep him there.

So I gave him a curt nod. “As you wish, Your Majesty.” I agreed stiffly.

He dropped his hand, relief flooding his features. I considered that for a moment as he magnanimously extended his arm. Leading the way back to the armchairs. I stood before mine, but did not sit, instead choosing to cross my arms over my chest. I had been told, due to the athletic tone of my body, that this was a rather imposing gesture on my part. Morgana had once told me it made my arms, chest, and shoulders look twice as big. My advisors had dryly followed up by telling me to never do so, as it hardly left the impression of a stately Prince. More, they said, a warmongering savage. But at that moment, I didn’t care. I wanted to make the goblin King feel small. I wanted him to be fearful and on edge.

I saw his eyes running me up and down, saw his narrow eyebrows twitch. He declined to sit as well, instead choosing to stand and face me with his three fingered hands lightly on his hips.

“When talk of peace between our two Kingdoms first arose,” he began, “I was the one who proposed a union through marriage. I had thought it a sign. My advisors have long been pressing the idea of my marriage, but I had always been hesitant. After all,” He smirked slightly here, “You only get married once.” He straightened, his smirk becoming a frown, “But I was told that your sister would be my prospective partner, as the King’s only daughter. The prospect of marrying a child, for any reason, left me ill at the thought.” He shifted, tucking his hands against the small of his back. “So when I learned of your lack of interest in the fairer sex,” He continued, and I stiffened slightly at the implications, “I was relieved. You are an adult, after all, only a few years my junior, able to consent to the marriage of your own free will. You would understand what the arrangement would entail, and my conscience would rest easy knowing it was a consensual contract.” The shadow of his smirk returned to the corners of his mouth. “Imagine my surprise when I learned that your people would take a direct proposal of this nature as an outright insult! That they would rather I marry a child than a Prince.”

“And yet, Your Majesty, you chose to lay the insult upon me nevertheless.” I mused, my voice still cold. My anger still pounding in my breast.

He raised his hands defensively. “I did not plan to pursue that course of action. Not until I learned it was you yourself who would be coming to the peace negotiations did I see the opportunity to even do so.” He considered me slyly. “I had heard tales of your family, of your pride and snobbery,” He raised his hands again as my eyes flashed, but his voice remained light and teasing, “Though I much preferred an arranged marriage with you, I had assumed I would not find you an appealing match in the least.”

“Your Majesty, if you intend to continue this line of-”

“I put you to a test,” He interrupted, returning his hands to the small of his back, eyes dancing, “It was childish, perhaps, and I will honestly say, I did fully expect you to fail. I proposed the marriage to your sister, to see if you would agree to such an outrageous pairing. Then I offered you an alternative.”

I considered him quietly, mulling over his words. I thought about speaking then, in the silence he let settle about us. But I decided to wait to see if he had more to say. Though it seemed less a defense of his behavior thus far and more of a confession. So I waited, eyes slightly narrowed, arms still crossed over my chest.

“... So you see, I expected you to offer your sister to me, rather than risk your own image and honor. As I said before.” He paused briefly, and his head cocked ever so slightly to the side. “... But you surprised me.”

I gritted my teeth, scowling at him. “I am afraid, Your Majesty, that your so-called honesty has only confirmed my understanding that you were simply stringing me along. Intending to dishonor and embarrass me without any intent of-”

“I have every intent-” He interrupted me again “-Of marrying you. I always have.”

That made my breath catch in my throat, and my composure slipped ever so slightly around my eyes as they widened. I quickly reset my features, swallowing the lump forming in my throat.

He watched quietly, then gestured again to the chair. “Please, let us return to our negotiations. If we can move past this strife… For the good of our people, if nothing else.”

I hesitated, watching him sit as if the matter had been settled. There was still a question burning on my lips, but I was not certain I could continue on with any semblance of a level head if I knew the answer. For that reason, I chose not to ask it; not yet at least. I gritted my teeth again, studying him as he waited patiently, gazing up at me with those scarlet eyes.

“Your Majesty, If I find this is some long winded prank-”

“It is not.” He promised, then smiled his coy, teasing smile. “And please call me Grier, I beg of you. I cannot suffer the titles and formalities much longer than I absolutely must.”

I glanced back at the waiting armchair, at the abandoned glass of brandy. “What assurance do I have that it is not?”

Grier lifted one long, slender finger, tapping his lips thoughtfully. “We shall put it in the document, if it would set your mind at ease.” He declared, reaching out and picking up the quill once more. “Should it be discovered that either party entered this marriage contract under false pretenses, it shall immediately become null and void, and the offending party shall secede to the ruling authority of the other.” He ended the sentence on the page with a fancy flourish of the quill tip, and raised one brow at me. “Is that satisfactory?”

I resisted the urge to give him an un-princely grumble, and settled for a scowl instead. But I did return to my seat, slowly, stiffly, and after a moment reached for my glass.

“I believe we should discuss the ceremony itself.” He proposed tentatively, watching me through his pale lashes as he took another sip of his own brandy. “To be certain it is official and legally binding for both species.”

I swallowed my sigh, and gave a small nod. “As you wish.”

The goblin did not continue right away, cocking his head to the side again and studying me as he took a deep, slow sip of his drink. I waited, rolling my own glass distractedly against my palms. It was smooth, and cool to the touch. Almost as soothing as the liquid it held.

“But perhaps we can leave that for a later date.” I glanced over at him, and he flashed me a charming smile of pointed teeth. “I would like to hear what additions to the contract you would like to discuss first.”

I took a sip of the brandy, nodding much more resolutely. “Very well. The taxes levied on the people-”

He waved his hand, cutting me off. “No, no.” He sat forward in his chair. “Let the understudies and scribes deal with such tedious ticks. We will review them before the formal signing, but need not discuss the specifics ourselves.”

I frowned. “I beg your pardon, I thought you wished to discuss my additions…. What other addendum would you mean to discuss?”

Grier sighed deeply, and his lips twitched with amusement. “Those of a more personal nature, of course.” He swirled his brandy with a deft wrist. “We discussed those issues I felt might arise through the course of our marriage; children, lovers, living arrangements. You must have your own expectations for this union as well. Something to put in ink.”

I stiffened, and my gaze snapped down to the drink in my hands. “... I do not.”

He scoffed, waving his hand again. “Come now, there must be something. Summer castles, hunting trips, gifts, anniversaries, retirement plans. Perhaps religious beliefs? Dietary requirements?” I shook my head, and he rolled his eyes teasingly. “You must have some thoughts or plans for the remainder of your life.”

I took another sip of the brandy, letting it sit in my mouth for a moment before slowly swallowing it. “... I have no expectations.”

That set a deafening silence upon the cluttered room, and we sat in it for an extended period. Grier watched me, and I watched the flames flickering in the fireplace. Keeping my stoney expression flat and void. I forced all other thoughts from my mind to keep them from my face. As I had been taught and perfected through a lifetime of necessity.

“... It is late.” The goblin replied finally, clearing his throat and shuffling the parchment on his lap. “Undoubtedly it has been a long day. If you are agreeable, I will take you to our guest quarters for the evening so you may rest.”

I looked at the papers he placed upon the marble table. “The contract-”

“Will be there in the morning, when we are both more rested and fresh.” He finished, tossing his head back to drain the last of his glass and standing.

I followed suit, brushing my hands down my abdomen to smooth the starchy fabric there. He gestured to me as he moved towards the door, and the weariness of the day dragged at my shoulders. I found I had not the strength to argue further, and simply fell in step behind him as he pulled open the grand door and stepped back out into the hall.

I had never had a head for floorplans or layouts, and the twists and turns he led me down quickly became jumbled in my tired mind. Give me a war field with troops and battalions and I could coordinate and execute the most stunning and creative of maneuvers. Place me in a castle hall and give me directions to the kitchen and I would get lost. So I stayed at his mercy, allowing him to lead me deeper into his underground castle until we came before a set of old wooden doors.

“Here we are.” He exclaimed, halting and turning to face me. I stopped short to avoid running into his smaller frame. Sharp teeth grinned up at me. “You should find everything you need here. And I shall have an attendant at the door, should you find you require anything additional.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty-” I noticed his brow twitch slightly at the title, and I quickly clamped my mouth shut over the last syllable.

I saw him hesitate, glancing at the door, then back to me. I sensed there was more, and waited patiently. Even though my palms itched to open the door and have the peace of my own company. Even though my spine ached from holding so straight and perfect for so many long hours. I was well versed in patience; in serving the will of another at the expense of my own. So I waited.

“I would request your presence for breakfast.” He said, cupping his hands behind his back. “... Socially. For the pleasure of your company and to get to know you better, if you are willing.” Now it was my turn to hesitate, my breath catching in my throat. “You may decline, if you wish.” He added quickly. “I do not mind sending your meal to your rooms, then we may speak later to complete the final details of the marriage contract.”

My besotted mind could not quite fathom the full extent of the offer, and I belittled a sigh that managed to sneak out with a soft gust from my nose. My lips pursed, I nodded to the Goblin King, feeling the hairs on the back of my neck prickle even as I did.

“Of course, Your-.... Ehm…” I cleared my throat, then looked down at the floor. “Of course… Grier.”

His name tasted strange on my tongue, and felt wrong to say. But the way he beamed up at me with delight made heat scratch at the edge of my collar. I shifted my weight slightly, glancing back at the stone floor.

“Excellent! I will see you in the morning then, Prince Nikostratus.”

...

UPDATE: Part two HERE

#mxm #oc #Royal Flush #monster x human #monster lover #monster boyfriend #monster husband #slow burn #two kings #monster romance #terato #exophilia #goblin #goblin lover #goblin boyfriend #goblin husband #arranged marriage #monster royalty

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amytabbycat · 4 years ago

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Art Commissions!

Heyooo!! I’ve decided to try my hand at commissions. I don’t have the physical means to get a job right now, so this could be a great way to have a bit of income. I’m rather new to this whole scene so please bear with me if I am awkward and inexperienced.

If you’re interested, I think probably the most effective place to discuss it would be Discord. Feel free to DM me here as well, I just may not notice it as quickly. You can find my Discord info at the bottom of the page!

Some disclaimers on my skill level: I don’t really know how to do backgrounds much at all which is why I left them off my pricing tiers, but maybe someday in the future I could try adding them. I may have difficulty with very complex designs or styles and I will try to be as up front as possible on whether something might be out of my wheelhouse. I am still learning how to shade and as such, I am generally rather sparing in my application. Mostly just small shadows around overlapping or folded areas to give subtle depth. So please don’t expect extremely fancy/advanced shading or lighting.

I tried to price my stuff at a rate that I consider to be on the cheaper end of artwork since I’m not the best out there by any means. The easiest payment option would be CashApp but I also recently made a PayPal so I can use that as well. We can discuss other options if you absolutely cannot use either of those, but I would greatly prefer to not have to create a ton of different accounts for various money apps if I don’t have to.

We can discuss specific details as closely as we need to during the art piece’s construction, and I can show concept sketches to make sure we’re on the same page with what you want. You do not need to handle payment until after the piece is completed, that way you don’t have to worry about your money simply disappearing. It also means that if by chance during the concept process, we realize that the idea you have in mind is beyond my capabilities, we can cancel the arrangement without a financial consequence on your end.

When the piece is completed, I will place a layer on top with a transparent watermark. This is basically a demo so that you can get the idea of what it looks like and get confirmation that it is indeed completed and ready for trade. I will not release the clean version until I receive payment. This isn’t a perfect plan, so if I encounter people that create a problem because of this, I may need to revise my payment strategy. But for the time being, let’s assume the best in each other and try to work under the honor system :]

And here is an example of what a watermarked demo piece may look like:

I’m still not sure what design I’ll put for it but it doesn’t really matter. The bottom line is it will be something transparent enough for you to actually see a glimpse of the piece underneath, but also visible enough that a clean version is required.

Congrats on making it to the bottom of the page! if you’re interested in pursuing a purchase and want to contact me on Discord, my account is AmyTabbyCat#3683

See y’all soon! :D

#digital art #art commission info #art commissions open

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finalvlog-a · 5 years ago

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SHIPPING INFO !!

ANSWER THE FOLLOWING FOR YOUR MUSE SO PEOPLE KNOW HOW SHIPPING WORKS ON YOUR BLOG.

REPOST DO NOT REBLOG!!!

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER?: Canon OTP is the trio from Inside Eden’s Gate in a platonic way. Found family is my JAM and I’m convinced Hannah, Sara and Alex are the OT3 of platonic goodness. So that’s my favorite! For Alex non-canon I haven’t had an OTP with him necessarily. I think the only one was with @sanctemony and that is a lot of messed up but super fun to write and I love Fox with all my heart so there is that. Damn that OOC bias.

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO WRITE WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?: I’m open to anything except for ships with underage muses/muns. This typically falls in the category of 21 and under for me, and Alex is 23. As a character Alex is more interested in people at his age or older rather than younger. With that said I really like ships with interesting dynamics to them that have underlying tension to explore. As of late I’d be very down for some wholesome content. Quarantine got me cravin’ the simple things.

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?: Wellllllllll. I mean. stares at @walridiing . I think Miles and Alex are the biggest age gap relationship I have here. Which is ~10 years. The only reason is because of my writing chemistry with Moss and our history of knowing one another and the way the characters ended up working together, I think to both our surprise. I’m not extremely picky when there are consenting adults, the ship has been discussed and there is an understanding between writers. I’ll never write underage Alex with anyone, or him with anyone as a teenager/borderline teenager either, regardless of the other muse’s age. 1. It’s not in his history and 2. I just get uncomfortable with it.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?: Not in the way this question is probably asking. I’m always down to ship. I just gravitate towards non-romantic ships with Alex. It feels like it fits him better as a character and I think that puts people off of shipping with him or discussing a ship. I’m EXTREMELY OPEN TO IT. Alex is just Like ThatTM with everyone. Being nice and easy to talk to and then there being a wall to get over as far as romance goes. TLDR; nope not selective, attack my inbox.

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NS/FW?: Uh. I’d say the moment there’s sexual nudity involved it is probably NSFW for the dash. I personally prefer things to be tagged NSFW when there’s explicit language/imagery. I think something’s nsfw if someone is describing in detail what they’re going to do to someone even if it’s not being actively written about, y’kno? I don’t really do the nsfw thing so uh you won’t be seeing this from me. *finger guns*

WHO ARE THE OTHER CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?: Alex is protective of all the good beans he’s come across. He’s probably going to die for @pocketknlves in some way. He’s a huge fan of Miles Upshur’s, ( @walridiing ) work as a journalist and of him in general. He’s usually got a default hate-ship as far as enemies go with any John or Jacob Seed he comes across, but I love exploring the nuances of it with the writers. Which, at the moment I’m exploring by beating the crap out of @absolveres and being the unfortunate soulmate of @only-we . Mmmm soulmate threads sustain me. @hopesecures is trying to worm his way in with bad jokes but Alex is staying strong. Meanwhile, @lambbled is someone he thinks could use a friend so he’s actively trying to do what he can to help her out – and will probably inevitably end up dying for as well. Almost all of the ships that take place with Alex are friends or enemies at this point. People for some reason end up protective of him which is hilarious to me. I love it. Y’all have chosen a doomed character to try and save but seriously, I love all ships. Ships doesn’t just mean romance for me.

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?: Please! Plot with me I love it. I have a much easier time shipping if I talk to somebody OOC even just the occasional DM (which I’m horrible about atm due to school) helps. I’ll accept all memes from people, and if I reblog a ship or NSFW one feel free to send it. Worst case scenario I’ll dm you and talk about it if I’m struggling to find inspiration.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?: Ship more-or-less. It’s never been a focus of this blog. Unless you consider character interactions to be ships then yes.

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?: Yep. All ships take place in their own universes. Character overlap only occurs at the agreement of all writers involved.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?: Points @walridiing

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?: If you see a meme, send it! Or if you ever want to talk to me OOC about it/our muses, just DM me! My inbox and chat are always open.

TAGGED BY: @lambbled bless u TAGGING: if you haven’t done it do the thing so i know who i can ship with

#➴ DASH GAMES … alex misc #☄ OFFLINE … ooc #// waowee this is the most i think #i've ever written about shipping #hope it clears up any misunderstandings #or uncertainties about me and alex

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she-who-the-river-could-not-hold · 5 years ago

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I’m so excited to have hit 800 followers over the weekend!!! I’ve definitely expanded what I post on here from my original fandoms and I’m so thankful y’all have decided to stick around. So many of you are rockstars and great friends, and have overall become such an important part of my time on here! The support you’ve given me really means the world. Therefore, it’s definitely time to do a celebration, don’t ya think?

To join in on the celebration, send me one of these emojis and a request:

🖤URL-Inspired Gifset or Moodboard (if it’s vague/not fandom please add an explanation so I get it right for you!)

🦇Make Me Choose (can be characters/scenes/seasons/etc)

🌿Characters/Ships Gifset or Moodboard (can be themed/specific or general)

🌙A Fic Moodboard or Gifset (include title + author, can be yours or someone else!)

For fandom content, I imagine most people are following me for either The 100 or Stranger Things, so obviously feel free to keep your request centric to that! But I’m totally open to any movies or shows that I post about (those tags can be found here and here) if we have overlapping interests.

Things Worth Mentioning:

We do not have to be mutuals

Please request it through your account, no anons please! If it's a main account just let me know your side blog's URL! It's up to you if you'd like to inbox me or DM me, but it'll be easier for you to be notified once I post it if it's through my inbox.

No abusive ships or characters thanks!

As of today's date (July 8th), this celebration does not have a closing date. I will update this post and reblog it with an update once I have one set up! Thanks again for all of the love!

#kat hits 800 #<-- block that if you'd rather not see all of this!

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narutaleseries · 5 years ago

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ABOUT NARUTALES This series is for us to really indulge ourselves in different ships of Naruto we felt like we didn’t get enough of or were written badly.

There will be one volume at a time. Each volume will feature either one zine, a cookbook, a tarot deck, or some other sort of format. If possible, each volume will be physical, with merch. All volumes will have an overarching theme of bonds, exploring relationship in Naruto. Some types of relationships that can be explored are: - familial (ex: Naruto/Iruka, Sasuke/Itachi, sand siblings) - romantic (includes LGBTQ+!!) - teams (inoshikacho, Akatsuki, the Sanins, etc.) - mentor-mentee (Sakura/Tsunade, Sakura/Naruto/Sai/Yamato, etc.) - and friendships (where can I start, there are so many!)

The tentative plan would be that each volume would concentrate on one type of relationship. Before each volume starts, there will be a vote to see which type of relationship will be the focal point of the volume.

My tentative plan for each volume will be as such: Volume #1: Physical zine with merch: Volume #2: Physical Tarot Deck with merch Volume #3: Physical Cookbook with merch and potentially more volumes depending on interest level! There is a possibility for maybe projects that have never been heard of before!

This series will be canon non-compliant, meaning they’re based on canon, but one can change and shift around events or diverge from canon. A rewrite of sorts. With that said, I’m also thinking of having these zines be story-focused, so more comics and fics-with-art kind of thing, but that is just a tentative plan. I also have a half-idea of how tales is a homonym of tail, referring to how Naruto was ostracized due to being a jinchuriki of the nine-tailed fox; how all the jinchuriki’s were isolated but that I’ll work on later with my mod team. if you feel the same way, or even just want to enjoy more ships in Naruto, please consider joining, and/or showing your support!

TENTATIVE SCHEDULE Nov 10 – 30: interest post Dec 1 – 22: mod apps -- Dec 24: results sent Jan 5 – 30: survey Feb 1 – 21: contributor apps -- Feb 29: results sent Mar 22: ideas/assignments Apr 12: check-in 1 May 3: check-in 2 May 31: final June: formatting June – July: preorders Aug – Sept: productions period Oct – Nov: shipping period

FAQ Q. Who is the current mod? What kind of experience do they have?

A. Mod Humanbob, pleasure to meet you!

(Website is currently under construction but it’ll be finished very soon)

Q. What will the current mod be doing for this project?

A. My major role will be organization, and my minor roles are communication! I’ll also be chipping in on other tasks, however, as I do have experience in all aspects of modding (other than graphic designing and formatting though. I can correct things but not make things myself - I’m hoping to learn how to do that soon 👀).

Q. Wait a sec - doesn’t Mod Humanbob have two other projects she’s working on? How will she manage them all?

A. Totally understandable concern! I’ve been staggering the schedules so the busy moments won’t overlap, as well as tried my best to place busy moments on holidays or times when I’m not busy with irl things. I’ve also decreased the workload by a lot by having templates of pretty much everything, which I can simply copy/paste for each project and adapt it. I also really like prepping everything before the project actually starts, so then a lot of the work is already done. For example, if you’ve noticed, all my projects have Twitter, Tumblr and sometimes Instagram already set up, with the theme and everything. I actually have most of the things sorted out, it just needs filling in with the help of my mod team and implementing. I have all the items needed for up til creations period - maybe the end of creations period even.

I’ve also been a part of 4+ zines at once, 2 of which I was basically head mod for. They are both completed or in the shipping phase as of now. Thus, I am not inexperienced in participating in more than 2 projects at one time.

Q. What mod roles will there be?

A. I will be taking in 3 - 4 mods, for a total of 4 - 5 mods. each with 1 major role (organization, marketing, graphic designing, or finance), along with 1 - 2 minor roles (communication, formatting, shipping, writer liaison, artist liaison, merch liaison). All mods must be able to chip in on various other tasks - things like participate in discussions, help make decisions and/or helping another mod out with a task. A more detailed description of what each job entails and how I envision the mod team to be will be posted with the mod app. I’ll also be taking on mod interns as well! Details TBA in the Mod App Post!

Q. Will the mods have to stay for the whole series?

A. Nope! You can decide to stay for all the zines, 3 of the zines, or just 1! So long as you let me know! I’ll be asking at the end of a zine whether you’d like to stay for the next one. The only rule for this that I think is best is that you cannot leave and ask to come back, ex. you mod the 1st zine, not do the 2nd, and then ask to come back for the 3rd.

Q. Manga or anime? What about the Rock Lee Spin-off?

A. All of them. They each have a special something that really adds to the story - it was so dope being able to not only read but also watch my favorite story in the whole fucking world. Rock Lee Spin-off is a fucking wild- Wait what? You weren’t asking about which ones I like, you were asking which ones will be included? Wow how rude. Hmmm good question - what would you guys want to see?

Q. What is the General Interest Post?

A. This is to quickly gauge everyone’s interest in this project ! If you want this zine to happen, all you need to do is reblog or like the post or follow the Tumblr/Twitter.

Q. What is the Survey?

A. The Interest Survey will be a Google Form with questions asked by the mods about what you want from the project. There will be one for customers and one for contributors.

Q. How will the contributors and mods be compensated?

A. For the time being, this project will be for charity - this means all profits made after shipping and product expenses will be given to a charity. I’d like to provide each contributor and mods each a free bundle, though, but that will have to depend on how sales go. If sales don’t go so well, then everyone will each receive at least the zine PDF, and a chance to buy everything else at production cost.

Q. What charity will you be donating to?

A. The organization has yet to be determined. I will discuss it first with the mods I hire, and then possibly ask in the interest survey which organization you all would like us to donate to.

Q. I have other questions - what do I do?

A. Feel free to message or send ask to @narutaleseries , or even through my personal blog @humanbobjeanpants ! You can also tag me or this zine in a post, or reply to any of the posts here. You can also email [email protected] , or dm or tag us on Twitter!

#faq and about #naruto #naruto shippuden #team 7 #team 9 #team 10 #akatsuki #konoha #sakura #sasuke #kakashi #gai

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groundramon · 7 years ago

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Mmmmm I got quite a few mutuals since I made my mutuals server sO if you have a discord and you’re interested in getting to know me a lil better or just wanna see me and my friends say dumb shit or even just play with our bots feel free to join us! No real limits on who can and who can’t join, you don’t even have to be a mutual (just someone I’m familiar with who follows me) but I’ll kick you if I feel like you’re causing trouble Link + rules/server explanation under the cut (if for whatever reason you can’t go to my blog, hmu in my dms or a non-anon ask)

Rules:

1. No rules, really! just be nice, don’t be gross, and if someone asks you not to do something then don’t do it again (if for whatever reason it’s something they have no right to be upset abt, like gay pda or some shit, I’ll step in - if i dont step in, assume they’re in the right, but if you’d like to take that up with me feel fre to). We don’t have any trigger lists currently but if you need triggers tagged hit me up, privately or in the server is fine! I may implement a channel for listing triggers as well as a general discussion if people want to bring up those topics for whatever reason.

*IMPORTANT NOTE: no visual nsfw or blood/gore/injuries is allowed since they trigger my own self and also nobody needs to see that shit. Some of the people in the chat, including myself, are minors. So yeah none of that will be present!*

Channel explanation:

I have a security system of sorts to keep stalkers, spam accounts, and any other nasty stuff out of my server. I mean I’m not really too concerned about that kind of stuff but I put it in just in case because I’m a paranoid bastard lmao. It also is all we can do to keep the bots in their own channel, lmao.

But because of this, when you enter the server, you’ll be unable to access the majority of the server save for “newb chat” and “intro”.

- Intro is where you introduce yourself! Just give your name, pronouns, and age/age range (I just need to know whether you’re a minor or an adult) and your tumblr username if it isn’t readily apparent from your discord! Once you post an intro, I’ll give you a role that

- Newb Chat has a list of explanations for (some of) the channels, and is also where you can talk if you’re not yet verified or trusted!

Once you get approved by me, you’ll have access to the following channels:

- general is for...general

- dab channel, dubstep channel, and ben 10 omniverse channel are all inside jokes. Go ahead and use them for relevant things though I guess

- pokecord - it’s for Pokecord! if you don’t know, pokecord is a discord bot that essentially lets you play Pokemon in Discord! We try to keep bots to two channels (boop can be accessed from all channels and pokecord is in the general bots channel, but otherwise the only other place they can access is intro and newb chat) so PLEASE keep pokecord-related matters to this channel as best you can! Don’t worry if Pokemon appear in other channels though (again they should only appear in pokecord, bots, intro, and newb chat) If you’ve never played pokecord before, type p!help or p!start.

- bots - its for bots! we’ve got an akinator bot, a phoenix wright bot, a casino bot, and a regular/general bot named Boop. We hate boop and aki. And pokecord. We hate all the bots except phoenix bot.

Extra channels:

- memes is for...memes

- art is for writing, drawing, artistic photography, sculptures, ect.

- serious-chat is for discussion or debate on tv shows, movies, books, ect. Analysis or recommendations. Pls warn about spoilers if possible. DO NOT PUT DISCOURSE OR POLITICS HERE IF YOU CAN HELP IT (I know there's an overlap but if its something you'd consider someone a bad person for disagreeing with, put it in the discourse channel. This includes stuff like shaladin)

- vent channel is for if you need to vent

- discourse is the place for politics and discourse. Be careful in there and mute it if you must. Hopefully we wont have to use that channel too much.

Welp that’s about it! Don’t be afraid to ask any questions, but with all that out of the way, here’s the server invite!

https://discord.gg/cuUWsyA

Don’t hesitate to drop in! You can leave any time, and there’s no activity requirements or anything!

#stormy speaks

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hidden-giggles · 7 years ago

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Story Time! A large compilation of IRL stories

So that “True Tickling Story Asks racked up a fair few requests, a great many of them repeats. The only people I can tag for this response are @crispysoultimemachine, @undermyfeather, and @lettheworldtickleyou. For all y’all anons, I hope you see these! Some overlap, so I may double up, don’t hate me?

Also shoutout to my FAVORITE Halloween film of all time Rocky Horror Picture Show. Oh the filth it involves. If you haven’t been to a live showing, go. I just went to another one and it just doesn’t get old. Pop that Rocky Cherry!

And so it begins! Click to see my adventures below the cut. Featured below, thought perhaps combined will be: 7. A time tickling went on longer than you wanted it to 8. A time someone held down your feet and tickled them 11. The most intense unintentional tickling you’ve ever endured 12. The most embarrassing tickling experience you’ve ever had 13. A time you were tickled in front of people 17. A time you tried to get yourself tickled 20. Your most ticklish pedicure 22. A time you were tickled in a public setting 24. A time you were asked to take off your shoes and it made you legitimately nervous 30. A time someone pulled your shoes off and tickled your feet 32. A time you tickled someone only to bait them into tickling you back

You’ve decided to brave this novel of a post? Well bless your heart. A portion of this will be out of order and covering parts of an 8 hour adventure with this asshole Josh I’m embarrassingly fond of. If you’re reading this, and I’m sure you are, try not to read into this too much or get too pleased. I’ll find a way to achieve revenge and you know it.

And so, starting this saga are numbers 7, 8, 12, 13, 22, and 30.

This summer in Paris, I had the pleasure of hanging out with Josh and showing him some of the sights around the 1st, 4th, and 12th arrondissements (sections of the city) and ordering the stuff we wanted in French. Bless his American heart 😛 But my foyer (dorm I guess?) was women only, and we weren’t about to bug his roommate, so for some 8 hours, we wandered some of my favorite and familiar parts of the city! Which also involved a lot, and I mean a lot of public play that flustered the hell out of me the entire time. And it was fun! But sometimes super duper embarrassing. For the first 45 minutes or so, we were chilling on the banks of the Seine in the 4th arr., just across the way from the islands in the center. We had some prosecco (Italian version of champagne), we relaxed, we chatted, totally surrounded by the dozens of other people doing the same on the grass and in the bars behind us. That did not, however, stop him from making me giggle like mad from head to toe, and I mean that literally. In a number of positions too, the worst of which involved me between his legs and leaning back, his thighs pinning my hands completely. He could reach everything, and I just about reached peak pitch in giggles. And then the ass made it worse. You see, my mouth ran rampant in France. I could say whatever I wanted in English because the kids didn’t know enough to be corrupted and only a portion of the adults knew enough English to understand. Even fewer cared. So when I begged calmly requested he cease fire, I was told to ask in French. The language people actually understood across the board. If people weren’t staring before (they were and it was so much worse knowing that), they were much more aware when I was, 1, begging en francais and 2, not getting my promised pause until a bit longer afterwards because he claimed he couldn’t understand me. I thought I might die, either from overheating with my massive blush or lack of breath for giggling and squealing myself to death. Oh god was I embarrassed, more than ever before, and more thoroughly played like a gosh darn fiddle. So I suppose the beginning of the evening covers numbers 7, 12, 13, and 22. Time skip like 4 hours. Apparently humans require food to function. I must have forgotten to read the “How to be Normal” manual because I had some bread at maybe 8 a.m. and then I didn’t really eat. But I had tea so I was totally hydrated! This is kind of common, my tum just doesn’t hold too much. But Josh, bless him, was less than pleased upon discovering that at midnight. And what’s open in Paris at midnight? Well, in the 1st arr. by the Hotel de Ville, it’s McDo, or McDonald’s. Bet y’all didn’t expect a cultural lesson with a tickling story, did you? And so, at midnight in the center of Paris in early August, we sat in a mostly empty McDonald’s munching on fries. And suddenly, my leg isn’t sitting still but rather being lifted, and shifted, and settled in his lap under the table. And my flip flop is coming off. And my heart stops. Oh god no no no no no, we are in an eating establishment, however casual it may be, being kicked out for disrupting the peace and being less than totally sanitary was not on my to-do list of rules I wanted to break while abroad (don’t follow my lead, learn from my example guys). I tried to pull my foot away, to put it back on the floor even without my shoe, but no such luck. I ankle was held tightly in place, I was stuck, even as his fingers started wiggling over my arches. I was biting my tongue, squeezing my eyes shut, shaking my leg and curling my toes, and I was still a squealing little mess. I begged, desperately, and after a short period of time I secured out exit from the restaurant and got my shoe back for the moment. But oh was I a nervous, flustered little thing. And that’s 8 and 30 for you! This doesn’t cover the entirety of the evening, and I don’t intend to, but those are some snippets to cover my bases!

On 24, I’m thankful to say I don’t recall being explicitly instructed to remove my shoes for any purpose that gave me reason to fear. If my shoes come off, it’s usually of my own volition and conception both.

Numbers 17 and 32 are another combination because I both attempted and succeeded, naturally. I have this nasty tendency to get what I want. Oops 😘🤗 It was a casual day last year in my dorm, and I was in a lounge watching a movie with a couple friends. One was a sister/good friend, the other a a good guy friend. Both knew I was sensitive, but my sister totally isn't when she doesn't want to be (like WTF I still don't know how she controls it?!). However, my dear friend totally is. It's super adorable. I didn't start it, but I totally didn't stop her when she starting poking at his stomach and he started squirming and trying to catch her hands. I was initially staying out of it because I didn't have a death wish, but he was between the two of us and it was just too easy because he couldn't fight the both of us, at least not well. Eventually I got the threat: "You're way worse than me! Keep doing that and you WILL get it back ten times as bad." It was effective for a bit, getting me to stop. And then a little poke. And then a couple more. Casual, spaced out, sneaky. No repercussions. I thought I had escaped, which felt like both victory and defeat. My sister had to go to some meeting, so it was just me and my friend. There was about 30 seconds of silence, just watching whatever movie was on - I couldn't tell you for the life of me what it was. And then: "Okay this has been a long time coming." I've never seen him move that quickly, but his arms shot out and his hands were tickling my stomach and sides before I had time to move or block. And oh was he right, I did get it ten times worse than I gave. For like 15 minutes. Of course he was terribly pleased the entire time I was writhing and squealing - apparently I make entertaining noises and he continues to point that out. It was the worst great kind of thing to happen on a lazy Saturday.

I know I'm totally and completely out of order on these, but hey, why not go with number 11 now? It was a girl's night, with PJs and cookie dough and pizza and I may or may not have been a little tipsy. It was just a little teeny tiny bit of a floaty feeling, I swear! But now I must regrettably inform you, darling reader, how sensitive I can be. Not always! But sometimes it's really bad. So picture this: I'm lounging on the couch, surrounded by my three or four friends, and one casually comments she likes my toenail polish color. Which would be fine and dandy—I was pretty fond of my signature OPI Big Apple Red too—if she didn't touch it. She didn't touch my skin, or even near it. She rubbed the polish on my big toe nail. And I still squeaked, my eyes wide as saucers, my toes curled, and biting my lip hard. Everyone in the room stopped and looked at me, most surprised and a little quizzical. "Are you really that ticklish? Oh my god." And so she did it again, and I jumped. And again, repeatedly, and I started squirming and trying to hold back giggles. And then she touched my toes and arches and I lost any sense of what was going on except for the fact that my friends were figuring out, some for the first time, how outrageously ticklish I am and having fun with it. I squirmed so much, desperate for an end to my embarrassed and unavoidable giggling, that I didn't realize it stopped until my feet were very warm. I opened my eyes. I had literally shoved my feet underneath my friend while she was sitting because her as was protecting them. It was shocking and hilarious enough that she did stop, but the damage had been done. All too many people know about how sensitive I am.

And finally, number 20 is about a pedicure. Which I've already written about. Fairly extensively throughout my blog. No offense, but if you want it you’re welcome to go searching because I’ve written a ton here already. Cool beans?

Thanks for tuning in! If you're interested in me verbalizing any of these experiences, feel free to check out my commission guidelines as they currently stand and pop onto my Ko-Fi with your request! Or just message me your business proposal, direct and upfront about your intentions in my DMs or inbox.

#about me #irl #irl story #sfw #rip rosie #ask me meme #anon #ask #answer #crispysoultimemachine #undermyfeather #lettheworldtickleyou

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sophygurl · 8 years ago

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And now that I’ve written up the panels I attended*, I will attempt to write a little bit about the ones I was actually on. I’m not multi-taskented enough to take vigorous notes while actually panelling, but I’ll try and get some basics down at least. Please feel free to comment with additions and corrections!

(* - I did not write up the Leverage panel because 1) I was super exhausted, and 2) it was mostly a FEELS/SQUEE panel anyway, and 3) I figured (rightly) that it would be heavily live-tweeted anyway, so instead of my trusty notebook and pen, I brought my pillow and I got there early and took up two chairs - I apologize as I know it ended up being standing room only but I decided this was an access issue as if I could not put my feet up my gimpy ass was going to have to go back to bed - and I kinda hugged the wall while sobbing freely, cheering loudly, and generally having an exceptional time. Check the #LeverageFandom on twitter for actual accounts, including some of the show creators tweeting back at the fans awwwww)

Anyway, the first panel that I was on was Science Fiction on TV (#SFonTV) with moderator Carrie Pruett and fellow panelists Sigrid Ellis and Candra K. Gill.

I was super excited to be on this panel because TV is my JAM and also all of those panelists are excellent people that I’ve had the privilege of panneling with in the past.

It was primarily a squee panel and I recall raving about 12 Monkeys, Dark Matter, Lucifer, Orphan Black, Luke Cage, Colony, The Expanse, and Timeless among other shows.

Candra and I bonded over being some of the few who prefer Dark Matter over Killjoys (I like them both but DM is one of my absolute faves and I feel like KJ gets a ton more attention).

We discussed some SFF comedies such as The Good Place, The Last Man on Earth, Powerless, and my personal rec: People of Earth (seriously watch this show).

We chatted about the proliferation of superhero shows (”when is Marvel going to get in the game?” LOL), and also time travel shows - some that succeeded and some that failed.

OUaT was brought up and many of us agreed that it’s one of those shows we just can’t quit even though we want to.

And then we did talk some about how much more representation we want out of our TV - specifically out of SFF TV because if they can have magic and super powers and time travel and futuristic sets and space travel - surely they could also have more people of color, more fat people, more disabled people, more queer people, more people of all shapes and sizes and colors. Why is this so hard!?

A few recs that others gave that I wrote down include: The Celluloid Closet documentary (that’s been rec’d to me before, I should really get on that), following Vincent D’Onofrio on twitter, and the show 3%.

At the end, I did my usual “I love TV - come talk to me about it” spiel, and my MOM from the audience said some embarrassing thing about how I also write great reviews (I don’t even really DO that anymore mom!) so I waved my hand and said “that’s my mom everyone - don’t listen to her!” - and then gave her a big hug after because that’s just such a my-mom thing of her to do and it’s so adorable how she always wants to come to WisCon to “see me talk”.

The next panel I was on was Where Do We Dystopia From Here? (#WhitherDystopia on the tweeters), which had a pretty good turn-out for a 10:30 pm panel. Our mod got sick so we had a sub-mod who had to kinda jump in to the subject matter last minute. I had some issues with my fellow panelist which isn’t worth getting into on a public post but otherwise I think the panel was good and the audience contributed a lot, which was cool, especially since we were across the hall from the Vid Party!

The hashtag for this one got some good rep, so check that out for a complete idea of how the panel went. I know I started off giving some history of the terms dystopia and utopia because I am a nerd who looks these things up ahead of time.

I also brought up “whose dystopia? dystopia for who?” a lot as a theme because so many dystopias focus on specific privileged groups who are suddenly having to face conditions that actual real populations of people are already dealing with, which can be frustrating. Also a main theme of dystopias is that some small group of powerful people are in control and wielding that authority in horrific ways - so for that small group of people - it’s not a dystopia. Basically, I just really want to encourage people to be constantly asking themselves whose dystopia is this, for whom is this a dystopia - both in their fiction and in real life.

We talked some about the differences and similarities between post-apocalyptic and dystopian fiction. One thing I’d noted when looking at examples myself was that post-apoc. fiction tends to be in more rural settings with themes about survival, and dystopian fiction tends to be set in more urban settings with the main theme being resistance. Of course, the two can be put together - especially when a dystopia arises after some cataclysmic event. But another form of dystopia is the kind I related to the frog-in-the-pot analogy of it happening slowly and gradually around people so that before they realize they’re in a dystopia it’s already too late.

Themes of dystopian fiction we discussed included: those in power using propaganda to make citizens believe they’re in an utopia; that the totalitarian control of a dystopia can come from any direction - both socialist and capitalist dystopias, dystopias where religion is suppressed or used to oppress, governments taken over or corporations have or technological advances have, etc.; constant surveillance being either a reality or a belief held to keep people under control, dehumanization of the groups being controlled.

When defining dystopia, especially in relation to similar genres, I said it’s kind of like the old saying about porn in that “I know it when I see it.” There’s a specific feel to dystopias - they don’t always fit exactly, but we recognize these common themes and kind of settle in to it.

I talked some about real life examples including the often-used Nazi Germany one, but also stuff from our own history in the U.S. - slavery, conditions after Hurricane Katrina, and frankly what’s happening right now in Flint, MI with the water crisis.

We talked about what is useful about dystopian fiction - how it reflects a society’s deepest fears and hopes for itself, can draw attention to current real issues, and can provide us with hope and even ideas as to how to resist dystopian aspects of our current situations - or where we see things going in the future.

As far as limitations and problems with the genre, I know I talked some about how most dystopian stories only focus on one or two issues and then take them to a sort of ridiculous extreme which can undermine the multiplicity of issues actually facing us and make us take them less seriously. Also, a common trope of YA dystopias specifically is that one special person who alone has the power to topple the powerful regime and how that trope can lessen the idea that we can all fight back and overcome these things.

We talked some about the increase in sales of 1984 and BNW after Trump’s election and what that means. I specifically found it interesting that it was these classics written by white guys and not more recent dystopias that may be more applicable or female authors, authors of color, etc.

I remember being asked about dystopias from more marginalized voices and wondering aloud about examples of poc authors writing dystopias - I could think of Octavia Butler’s Parable series and posited that N. K. Jemisin’s Broken Earth series might fit (got some questioning looks there so IDK if I sold that or not), and someone in the audience reminded me of Alaya Dawn Johnson’s The Summer Prince (which I need to read!), but I don’t think we came up with anything else.

There was an audience comment about having trouble relating to urban dystopias where they just don’t have skills that could keep them alive because they feel like those would be fairly easy things to learn how to do. I talked about a common theme in dystopias being that either nature no longer exists because we’ve destroyed it or it’s being forbidden in some way - such as in The Hunger Games.

Some of the sources I referenced included: Brave New World, Nineteen Eighty Four, Woman on the Edge of Time, The Handmaid’s Tale, Parable of the Sower, The Hunger Games series, 12 Monkeys, Mad Max, The Matrix, The Purge movies, Continuum, Colony.

Recs from others that I managed to jot down: Paolo Bacigalupi’s work, Lois Lowry’s The Giver, The Roar and The Whisper by Emma Clayton, Jennifer Government by Max Barry, the Silo series by Hugh Howey, Red Rising by Pierce Brown, The Grace of Kings by Ken Liu, Underground Airlines by Ben Winters, and the Snowpiercer movie.

(I was pleased after attending the other Dystopia panel the next day that we hadn’t had too much overlap. Ours was focused primarily on fiction with a little bit about real life where the other one focused more on real life stuff as it pertains to fiction.)

The third and final panel I was on was The Age of the Scifi Cop Show (#ScifiCops) with moderator Candra K. Gill and my fellow panelist Samuel Steinbrock-Pratt.

This one’s got a lot in the hashtag too, so check it out! Candra and Samuel had a lot of cool stuff to say, as did our lively audience. Samuel especially had a great perspective because he’s a criminal defense attorney.

We discussed issues of surveillance and privacy as it relates both to tech-heavy sci-fi shows and more paranormal shows where, for instance, the zombie can eat a murder victim’s brain and gain their memories like in iZombie.

We talked a lot about superhero/vigilante shows and how they represent who is and isn’t allowed to break the laws and why. Samuel had some strong feelings about Daredevil, especially, as a defense attorney who 1) only wants to represent the innocent and 2) goes out and breaks laws all the time himself. I added that Luke Cage did some interesting things in regards to intersections with vigilantism and law enforcement, as well as race, class, and gender.

Person of Interest was another show we talked about a lot, both positive and negative.

One topic was why there are so many scifi cop shows, and just cop shows anyway. Part of the reason is that it’s a nice formula for a show to follow in a serial format. Another is the ability for lots of excitement and drama involved. Also examined was the idea of who profits from having a common narrative where the cops are our protags?

We talked some about how these shows, in a genre that’s supposed to be about stretching the imagination, still don’t address so many systemtic issues in the police such as racism and abelism. Some shows actively reinforce these things by having us rooting for cops who are corrupt themselves, where other shows just gloss over these problems by having active surveillance and yet not dealing with things such as stop and frisk laws.

Samuel and Candra had some great things to say about cop shows set in the future and how they tend to criminalize the same things we do now, but that what we decide are crimes changes over time. For example - drug crimes are a thing that a futuristic cop/legal show could show having been abolished. Or what about a future where there are no cops? What about reparative justice?

An audience member asked about an epidemiological approach to crime. They used the example of lead poisoning leading to violence, which another audience member refuted, but the issue of taking an approach of what health issues might be causing crime remained of interest. The Reavers from Firefly were brought up.

I talked about a Canadian show called Cracked, starring David Sutcliffe, which is not a Sci-fi show, but does deal with cops gaining a greater understanding of how mental health issues intersect with crime - from either the perpetrator or victim side of things. The show paired cops with psychiatrists or psych nurses in a unit specially created to deal with crime relating to mental illness.

We talked some about shows coming more from the outlaw angle such as Mr. Robot and Leverage.

Other shows I brought up included Stitchers, Limitless, Lucifer, Lost Girl, Minority Report, Continuum, and IDK a bunch more.

Some stuff that got rec’d that I wrote down to check out included: Ultraviolet (the TV show not the movie), and the book A Door Into Ocean for it’s portrayal of banishment and reconciliatory justice.

Phew! And so. Those were my panels. Or at least, what I can recall of them a good week later.

I always appreciate getting feedback as a panelist - so feel free to chat with me, privately or publicly, about how you think the panel went if you were at any of these!

#wiscon #wiscon 41 #sfontv #whitherdystopia #scificops #wiscon41 #wc41

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whitelabelseoreseller · 5 years ago

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How to Get a Customer to Edit Their Negative Review

Posted by MiriamEllis

“When you forgive, you in no way change the pas — but you sure do change the future.” — Bernard Meltzer

Your brand inhabits a challenging world in which its consumers’ words make up the bulk of your reputation. Negative reviews can feel like the ultimate revenge, punishing dissatisfactory experiences with public shaming, eroded local rankings, and attendant revenue loss. Some business owners become so worried about negative reviews, they head to fora asking if there is any way to opt-out and even querying whether they should simply remove their business listings altogether rather than face the discordant music.

But hang in there. Local business customers may be more forgiving than you think. In fact, your customers may think differently than you might think.

I’ve just completed a study of consumer behavior as it relates to negative reviews becoming positive ones and I believe this blog post will hold some very welcome surprises for concerned local business owners and their marketers — I know that some of what I learned both surprised and delighted me. In fact, it’s convinced me that, in case after case, negative reviews aren’t what we might think they are at all.

Let’s study this together, with real-world examples, data, a poll, and takeaways that could transform your outlook.

Stats to start with

Your company winds up with a negative review, and the possibility of a permanently lost customer. Marketing wisdom tells us that it’s more costly to acquire a new customer than to keep an existing one happy. But it's actually more far-reaching. The following list of stats tells the story of why you want to do anything you can to get the customer to edit a bad review to reflect more positive sentiment:

57 percent of consumers will only use a business if it has four or more stars — (BrightLocal)

One study showed that ~1.5-star rating increase improved conversions from 10.4 percent to 12.8 percent, representing about 13,000 more leads for the brand. — (Location3)

73.8 percent of customers are either likely or extremely likely to continue doing business with a brand that resolves their complaints. — (GatherUp)

A typical business only hears from four percent of its dissatisfied customers, meaning that the negative reviews you rectify for outspoken people could solve problems for silent ones. — (Ruby Newell-Lerner)

89 percent of consumers read businesses' responses to reviews. — (BrightLocal)

The impact of ratings, reviews, and responses are so clear that every local brand needs to devote resources to better understanding this scenario of sentiment and customer retention.

People power: One reason consumers love reviews

The Better Business Bureau was founded in 1912. The Federal Trade Commission made its debut just two years later. Consumer protections are deemed a necessity, but until the internet put the potential of mass reviews directly into individuals hands, the “little guy” often felt he lacked a truly audible voice when the “big guy” (business) didn’t do right by him.

You can see how local business review platforms have become a bully pulpit, empowering everyday people to make their feelings known to a large audience. And, you can see from reviews, like the one below, the relish with which some consumers embrace that power:

Here, a customer is boasting the belief that they outwitted an entity which would otherwise have defrauded them, if not for the influence of a review platform. That’s our first impression. But if we look a little closer, what we’re really seeing here is that the platform is a communications tool between consumer and brand. The reviewer is saying:

“The business has to do right by me if I put this on Yelp!”

What they’re communicating isn’t nice, and may well be untrue, but it is certainly a message they want to be amplified.

And this is where things get interesting.

Brand power: Full of surprises!

This month, I created a spreadsheet to organize data I was collecting about negative reviews being transformed into positive ones. I searched Yelp for the phrase “edited my review” in cities in every region of the United States and quickly amassed 50 examples for in-depth analysis. In the process, I discovered three pieces of information that could be relevant to your brand.

Surprise #1: Many consumers think of their reviews as living documents

In this first example, we see a customer who left a review after having trouble making an appointment and promising to update their content once they’d experienced actual service. As I combed through consumer sentiment, I was enlightened to discover that many people treat reviews as live objects, updating them over time to reflect evolving experiences. How far do reviewers go with this approach? Just look:

In the above example, the customer has handled their review in four separate updates spanning several days. If you look at the stars, they went from high to low to high again. It’s akin to live updates from a sporting event, and that honestly surprised me to see.

Brands should see this as good news because it means an initial negative review doesn’t have to be set in stone.

Surprise #2: Consumers can be incredibly forgiving

“What really defines you is how you handle the situation after you realize you made a mistake.”

I couldn’t have said it better myself, and this edited review typifies for me the reasonableness I saw in case after case. Far from being the scary, irrational customers that business owners dread, it's clear that many people have the basic understanding that mistakes can happen… and can be rectified. I even saw people forgiving auto dealerships for damaging their cars, once things had been made right.

Surprise #3: Consumers can be self-correcting.

The customer apparently isn’t “always right,” and some of them know it. I saw several instances of customers editing their reviews after realizing that they were the ones who made a mistake. For example, one rather long review saga contained this:

“I didn't realize they had an hourly option so my initial review was 3 stars. However, after the company letting me know they'd be happy to modify my charges since I overlooked the hourly option, it was only fair to edit my review. I thought that was really nice of them. 5 stars and will be using them again in the future.”

When a customer has initially misunderstood a policy or offering and the business in question takes the time to clarify things, fair-minded individuals can feel honor-bound to update their reviews. Many updated reviews contained phrases like “in good conscience” and “in all fairness.”

Overall, in studying this group of reviewers, I found them to be reasonable people, meaning that your brand has (surprising) significant power to work with dissatisfied customers to win back their respect and their business.

How negative reviews become positive: Identifying winning patterns

In my case study, the dominant, overall pattern of negative reviews being transformed into positive ones consisted of these three Rs:

Reach — the customer reaches out with their negative experience, often knowing that, in this day and age, powerful review platforms are a way to reach brands.

Remedy — Some type of fix occurs, whether this results from intervention on the part of the brand, a second positive experience outweighing an initial negative one, or the consumer self-correcting their own misunderstanding.

Restoration — The unhappy customer is restored to the business as a happy one, hopefully, ready to trust the brand for future transactions, and the reputation of the brand is restored by an edited review reflecting better satisfaction.

Now, let’s bucket this general pattern into smaller segments for a more nuanced understanding. Note: There is an overlap in the following information, as some customers experienced multiple positive elements that convinced them to update their reviews.

Key to review transformation:

70 percent mentioned poor service/rude service rectified by a second experience in which staff demonstrated caring.

64 percent mentioned the owner/manager/staff proactively, directly reached out to the customer with a remedy.

32 percent mentioned item replaced or job re-done for free.

20 percent mentioned customer decided to give a business a second chance on their own and was better-pleased by a second experience.

6 percent mentioned customer realized the fault for a misunderstanding was theirs.

From this data, two insights become clear and belong at the core of your reputation strategy:

Poor and rude service seriously fuel negative reviews

This correlates well with the findings of an earlier GatherUp study demonstrating that 57 percent of consumer complaints revolve around customer service and employee behavior. It’s critical to realize that nearly three-quarters of these disasters could be turned around with subsequent excellent service. As one customer in my study phrased it:

“X has since gone above and beyond to resolve the issue and make me feel like they cared.”

Proactive outreach is your negative review repair kit

Well over half of the subjects in my study specifically mentioned that the business had reached out to them in some way. I suspect many instances of such outreach went undocumented in the review updates, so the number may actually be much higher than represented.

Outreach can happen in a variety of ways:

The business may recognize who the customer is and have their name and number on file due to a contract.

The business may not know who the customer is but can provide an owner response to the review that includes the company’s contact information and an earnest request to get in touch.

The business can DM the customer if the negative review is on Yelp.

You’re being given a second chance if you get the customer’s ear a second time. It’s then up to your brand to do everything you can to change their opinion. Here’s one customer’s description of how far a local business was willing to go to get back into his good graces:

“X made every effort to make up for the failed programming and the lack of customer service the night before. My sales rep, his manager and even the finance rep reached out by phone, text and email. I was actually in meetings all morning, watching my phone buzz with what turned out to be their calls, as they attempted to find out what they could do to make amends. Mark came over on my lunch break, fixed/reprogrammed the remote and even comped me a free tank of gas for my next fill up. I appreciated his sincere apologies and wanted to update/revise my review as a token of my appreciation.”

What a great example of dedication to earning forgiveness!

Should you actively ask restored customers to edit their negative reviews?

I confess — this setup makes me a bit nervous. I took Twitter poll to gauge sentiment among my followers:

Respondents showed strong support for asking a customer who has been restored to happiness to edit their review. However, I would add a few provisos.

Firstly, not one of the subjects in my study mentioned that the business requested they update their review. Perhaps it went undocumented, but there was absolutely zero suggestion that restored customers had been prompted to re-review the business.

Secondly, I would want to be 100 percent certain that the customer is, indeed, delighted again. Otherwise, you could end up with something truly awful on your review profile, like this:

Suffice it to say, never demand an edited review, and certainly don’t use one as blackmail!

With a nod to the Twitter poll, I think it might be alright to mention you’d appreciate an updated review. I’d be extremely choosy about how you word your request so as not to make the customer feel obligated in any way. And I’d only do so if the customer was truly, sincerely restored to a sense of trust and well-being by the brand.

So what are negative reviews, really?

In so many cases, negative reviews are neither punishment nor the end of the road.

They are, in fact, a form of customer outreach that’s often akin to a cry for help.

Someone trusted your business and was disappointed. Your brand needs to equip itself to ride to the rescue. I was struck by how many reviewers said they felt uncared-for, and impressed by how business owners like this one completely turned things around:

In this light, review platforms are simply a communications medium hosting back-and-forth between customer people and business people. Communicate with a rescue plan and your reputation can “sparkle like diamonds”, too.

Reviews-in-progress

I want to close by mentioning how evident it was to me, upon completing this study, that reviewers take their task seriously. The average word count of the Yelp reviews I surveyed was about 250 words. If half of the 12,584 words I examined expressed disappointment, your brand is empowered to make the other half express forgiveness for mistakes and restoration of trust.

It could well be that the industry term “negative” review is misleading, causing unnecessary fear for local brands and their marketers. What if, instead, we thought of this influential content as “reviews-in-progress,” with the potential for transformation charting the mastery of your brand at customer service.

The short road is that you prevent negative experiences by doubling down on staff hiring and training practices that leave people with nothing to complain about in the entire customer service ecosystem. But re-dubbing online records of inevitable mistakes as “reviews-in-progress” simply means treading a slightly longer road to reputation, retention, and revenue. If your local brand is in business for the long haul, you’ve got this!

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theinjectlikes2 · 5 years ago

Text

How to Get a Customer to Edit Their Negative Review

Posted by MiriamEllis

“When you forgive, you in no way change the pas — but you sure do change the future.” — Bernard Meltzer

But hang in there. Local business customers may be more forgiving than you think. In fact, your customers may think differently than you might think.

Let’s study this together, with real-world examples, data, a poll, and takeaways that could transform your outlook.

Stats to start with

57 percent of consumers will only use a business if it has four or more stars — (BrightLocal)

One study showed that ~1.5-star rating increase improved conversions from 10.4 percent to 12.8 percent, representing about 13,000 more leads for the brand. — (Location3)

73.8 percent of customers are either likely or extremely likely to continue doing business with a brand that resolves their complaints. — (GatherUp)

89 percent of consumers read businesses' responses to reviews. — (BrightLocal)

The impact of ratings, reviews, and responses are so clear that every local brand needs to devote resources to better understanding this scenario of sentiment and customer retention.

People power: One reason consumers love reviews

“The business has to do right by me if I put this on Yelp!”

What they’re communicating isn’t nice, and may well be untrue, but it is certainly a message they want to be amplified.

And this is where things get interesting.

Brand power: Full of surprises!

Surprise #1: Many consumers think of their reviews as living documents

Brands should see this as good news because it means an initial negative review doesn’t have to be set in stone.

Surprise #2: Consumers can be incredibly forgiving

“What really defines you is how you handle the situation after you realize you made a mistake.”

Surprise #3: Consumers can be self-correcting.

How negative reviews become positive: Identifying winning patterns

In my case study, the dominant, overall pattern of negative reviews being transformed into positive ones consisted of these three Rs:

Reach — the customer reaches out with their negative experience, often knowing that, in this day and age, powerful review platforms are a way to reach brands.

Key to review transformation:

70 percent mentioned poor service/rude service rectified by a second experience in which staff demonstrated caring.

64 percent mentioned the owner/manager/staff proactively, directly reached out to the customer with a remedy.

32 percent mentioned item replaced or job re-done for free.

20 percent mentioned customer decided to give a business a second chance on their own and was better-pleased by a second experience.

6 percent mentioned customer realized the fault for a misunderstanding was theirs.

From this data, two insights become clear and belong at the core of your reputation strategy:

Poor and rude service seriously fuel negative reviews

“X has since gone above and beyond to resolve the issue and make me feel like they cared.”

Proactive outreach is your negative review repair kit

Outreach can happen in a variety of ways:

The business may recognize who the customer is and have their name and number on file due to a contract.

The business may not know who the customer is but can provide an owner response to the review that includes the company’s contact information and an earnest request to get in touch.

The business can DM the customer if the negative review is on Yelp.

What a great example of dedication to earning forgiveness!

Should you actively ask restored customers to edit their negative reviews?

I confess — this setup makes me a bit nervous. I took Twitter poll to gauge sentiment among my followers:

Respondents showed strong support for asking a customer who has been restored to happiness to edit their review. However, I would add a few provisos.

Secondly, I would want to be 100 percent certain that the customer is, indeed, delighted again. Otherwise, you could end up with something truly awful on your review profile, like this:

Suffice it to say, never demand an edited review, and certainly don’t use one as blackmail!

So what are negative reviews, really?

In so many cases, negative reviews are neither punishment nor the end of the road.

They are, in fact, a form of customer outreach that’s often akin to a cry for help.

Reviews-in-progress

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