#If anyone has different thoughts on them I’d be super interested to hear

[paladinsbrainrot]

hello just wanted to say I think you’re really cool and I love your art!! I also LOVE romike too, super excited for their dynamic in s5

I’d love to hear your thoughts on them and if you have any predictions/theories/things you’d like to see with them next season :]

OHHHHH MY GOD thank you this is such an amazing question !!!! so sorry it took me so long to answer however i have very many Thoughts™

the idea of robin and mike being friends is soooo dear to me you don't even understand. romike has been on my mind since before s4 even came out #Tbh I just think that they are so similar and tethered and it's just so shocking that they haven't properly interacted yet!!!

obviously I think romike first came to fruition through the idea that robin would act like a gay mentor to mike and kind of guide him to realize his feelings for will, but they're so much more than this mentor/mentee relationship. not only would it be an interesting dynamic to explore as they have barely interacted, but they are literally both Anxiety As A Person and their personalities would compliment each other so well. mike's reluctance to open up to people & robin's willingness to ramble to anyone she meets? sign me up. both are bottling up their emotions in totally different ways. i would live for them awkwardly bumping into each other and mike finding her annoying at first but then realizing she is literally his carbon copy and that they are so much more alike than he first thought. (I would argue that they are literally madwheeler 2.0 sans the bitchiness.) them both bonding over the fact that they have trouble expressing their emotions and that they feel like outsiders????? them both realizing they are stuck in the same boat and using each other as an outlet to open up (+ it would be way easier for them to talk about these things because they aren't super close)????? hEllooooo duffers Are u seeing this?????? their dynamic would be so interesting if they don't write it I'm going to have to do it myself.

as for general predictions/theories..... oh boy I have Lots!!!!

I think that the writers are leaning more towards a rowill focus than a romike one this season so I don't think we will see as much as them as I would hope for. BUT this post gives me the idea that we will get a bunch of romikewill scenes on the farm with maybe a dash of one-on-one romike content sprinkled in there for the wellbeing of the people (the people being me and the other two romike fans on this app). as much as I love romike I think will and robin are the characters who Need to talk to each other the most because they're both still closeted. though as I said before I pray that the duffers will realize the potential that romike has as well 🙏

so I've basically done a whole lot of rambling and haven't even answered your question so I'm just gonna get straight to what I want for them this szn if this were my perfect world 🎉

I have this one recurring dream that mainly only exists because of a fic I wrote an extremely long time ago but basicalllyyy the essence of it was that mike and el were in this weird phase in their relationship where they were distant, awkward, and were almost uncomfortable around each other? so mike, incredibly frustrated and fed up with this, starts acting moody and withdrawn from everyone else. also bc this is s5 lets just add the fact that his sister is missing, he just got beat up by the school bullies, and maybe he and will got into the painting fight or something. so just imagine mike being almost reclusive and reserved on the farm set. maybe robin notices his lack of exuberance (that's probably not the right word but whatever) and decides to take matters into her own hands. she asks what his deal is and if he's doing all right with everything going on. mike pretends he's super annoyed by her because of all the questions she asks him but maybe she makes some offhand remark about how they're stuck on this stupid farm and it'll only get worse if he keeps acting like this. (and also, they have bigger issues to worry about!) so mike, quickly realizing that robin is literally the only person on this farm that is there for him to talk to, opens up to her a little reluctantly about everything going on with him. it's important that this is a slow process and that he doesn't dump everything on her at once. maybe he says that he doesn't know what he's doing with his and el's relationship and how will's not talking to him and that he feels he keeps screwing things up with the people he cares about the most. insert moment of robin being robin and clearing up the air, relieving the tension off mike's shoulders, and also giving him some very valuable advice!! obviously there's much more here to explore upon but the general gist of it is that they become much closer after this. robin learns that she can open up to mike too, about how some "person" that she's interested in is giving her mixed signals and how she is actually very scared about the end of the world but feels like she has to deflect everything with humour. they learn they are able to confide in each other and boom romike world domination!!!

I kind of what them to be like a mix of steve & robin and mike & nancy and mike & max, if that makes sense. like steve and robin's closeness, mike and nancy's worry about each other, and mike and max's bickering and (loving) malice. Idk mike is very irritable and snarky and robin is very direct and straightforward and also very tentative so I think their dynamic would just feel natural and compliment each of their personalities!!

I also think their dynamic could be veryyy beneficial to discovering the key to destroying vecna once and for all !!! these two are arguably the smartest characters on the show and work in very like minded ways. robin figured out when blue meets yellow in the west (cough) and that music is the key to getting out of vecna's mindscapes. mike has had wayyy too many clutch moments during the show that I can't mention here otherwise this post would get too long, but you get the point. putting both of their brains together might help our characters figure out how to end this battle. this script that maya hawke posted a while back that features both of mike and robin's names makes me very hopeful that this will be a possibility in s5. (potential st5 spoilers incoming ->) my current running Theory is that mike and robin discover that the military or hnl (is it still running in s5? idk) are running experiments on kids again and use the mccorkle farm and subsequent tunnels underneath to help the kids escape. (mayhaps this is how derek ends up on the farm after being spotted with the military??? idk.)

I am trying not to get my hopes up about robin and mike being spotted at hawkins lab together (potentially with el and will too 👀) but I have a feeling that this is related to whatever was going on in the tunnels. I have No Clue about what is going down at hawkins lab but one can only hope that they are there because the gang realized they needed two of the smartest people as well as the two strongest/most powerful to figure out the situation with the gates. great minds think alike or something like that!!!

this is more leaning towards romikewill territory but Idk I would just liveeeee for a scene of robin picking up on the labyrinthine circumstance that is will & mike's relationship and teasing mike about it !!! and in return I would like a Lot of mike teasing robin about vickie. I think (key word Think) vickie is on the farm with them so I need lots of scenes of robin not so subtly flirting with vickie and vickie flirting back and giggling like a maniac and mike noticing out of the corner of his eye and smiling. i want him to go up to robin later and just whisper shout that vickie is soooo into her. something similar happening with byler and robin noticing would also be very plausible. i just think it would be so sweet for mike and robin to see themselves in their friends and the people around them to help guide them towards their self-acceptance arcs, and learn that there is some hope for them after all ☹️ the only thing I don't want to see is only one of them being used just to further the romantic advances in the other's story. like I don't want the only reason robin interacts with will and mike in s5 to be to help guide byler towards e/o or for mike to do the same thing with rovickie!! it's important that they both realize that having queer friends is just as significant, and that they both are able to confide in each other about their struggles and worries, whether it's about their relationship or not.

there was also this one leak from early 2024 (another leak warning if you haven't clicked off this post already) that stated that mike and robin had a few scenes together because mike was worried about will, and robin was worried about vickie, and bonded because of this. I think this is a much more plausible way for them to start talking to each other than that scenario I mentioned earlier lol. I really hope that vickie is related to derek or the turnbows in some capacity; it would make her such less of a random character and also give robin a reason to be worried about her (and would also tie into them helping derek escape and the fact that he's on the farm with the rest of them). romike confiding in each other about the fact that they feel like they are useless/can't save the people they love AUGHHHH give it to me now . (edit: the leak is mentioned somewhere in this post you just may have to dig for it)

this post is very long and a total incoherent ramble so I am Very sorry but unfortunately I will never be normal about romike a day in my life. @willelworld (my lovely fellow romike enthusiast!) made a very great point in this post that I would like to end off with because it just sums up what is so perfect about them:

I really hope that my favourite adhd losers will be able to bond over their social incompetencies and sexualities and suppressed emotions and so much more in st5!!!! they just have such best friend material so I hope the duffers do not waste this absolute perfect opportunity to write a queerplatonic friendship ^_^

[hawkfawun]

Since I’m still thinking about it still. I’m trying to figure out what I think the “you belong to me” parallels are communicating. Obviously Farnese’s possessive behavior stems from an extreme fear of abandonment. Serpico is not only the one who protects her physically, but is the only person she’s connected with emotionally in her entire life. Similarly Guts has a “hold over Griffith”. Griffith has intense feelings for him that cause him to act irrationally. He asserts that Guts belongs to him when it goes both ways.

Farnese has also grown up in an environment where one slip up means men, woman and children can end up burned alive. So she deals with it by “becoming the thing she fears”. I think it’s less direct with Griffith- but he fears losing men so he claims they aren’t his friends and still keeps fighting battles.

I think that mentality is present in other characters too. Guts fears abandonment just like them, so he leaves first. A lot of Berserk characters try to take control of their insecurities and fears in ways that are ultimately harmful to themselves and others.

Another little thing that both Farnese and Griffith have is feeling dirty and impure, yet both have animal motifs associated with holiness and purity. A white bird, unicorn and angel wings.

[theamityelf]

any thoughts on how makoto’s yandere S/O would react to finding out that he’s been restricting food due to not feeling like he’s at an attractive weight? i’m asking with nagito, izuru, and mukuro in mind, but if there are additional/different characters that come to mind instead, i’d love hear what you think!

(I see that you sent this ask a second time, so for the record this is the first one! 😁 I was working on it in my drafts, lol.)

Ooh, interesting prompt. I'll do the specific ships you asked for first, then see about some others, lol!

As far as the premise itself, Makoto having body image issues could make a lot of sense, whether it's at Hope's Peak (lots of Olympic athletes and movie stars and supermodels) or at the Future Foundation (just imagining their propaganda images of him are super photoshopped to make his body look "more heroic"). Now, for the ships:

Komaegi

I feel like in this case Makoto would be distinctly ashamed of the reason for his bad relationship with food, since Nagito is so focused on principles and virtues. I think Makoto would somewhat expect Nagito to be disappointed by his "vanity".

Nagito's actual reaction depends so heavily on when this happens (pre-Tragedy or post-Tragedy, pre-NWP or post-NWP) and what flavor of yandere he is. Overall, the possibilities exist on a spectrum between Brutal Nagito, who will think it's helpful to reinforce Makoto's insecurities so he can stop fixating on them (or that's the rationalization he offers himself; what he's really doing is keeping Makoto down out of fear that once Makoto knows how amazing he is, he won't need or want him anymore) and Worshiper Nagito, who's just all praise.

So, the former is like, "I see. You're worried you don't look as good as they do? But of course you don't! You're a completely average, normal person. You can't be expected to compare to anyone in a world of Ultimates. Hey, cheer up. Think of it more like this: You don't need to compare to any of them, because no one is looking at you at all! Except me, of course. I think your average build is cute. There's no need to compare yourself to Ultimates; I like you for who you are."

And the latter is like, "Ah, I should have spoken up sooner. How thoughtless of me, to let you waste a second thinking anyone here holds a candle to you. I truly regret my negligence. I would have been singing your praises from the rooftops, had I known you suffered from even the briefest of doubts." And from there he just keeps showering Makoto in compliments about his appearance and personality (and some trace amounts of shade for everyone else) until Makoto goes from ashamed-embarrassed to flattered-embarrassed. And he will be doing this regularly from now on.

Kamuegi

This one's cool because Makoto's attempts to regulate how much he eats will directly grate against Izuru's attempts to feed him good food. It wouldn't take Izuru all that long to figure out Makoto's reservations, but instead of going the way of overwhelming praise like Nagito, he's just going to reinforce the behavior of eating by giving him tasty food and showing him affection when he eats it all (positive reinforcement– providing a positive stimulus to encourage a behavior) and by scolding, insulting, or threatening anyone who continues to feed into Makoto's body image issues (negative reinforcement– removing a negative stimulus to encourage a behavior).

The first part is self-explanatory. The second part is lowkey funny, because all someone has to do is be shirtless in Makoto's presence and have a flatter stomach or bigger muscles, and Izuru is immediately like, "Put those away. You look ridiculous." He's giving everybody else body image issues to make Makoto feel better. And if Future Foundation propaganda is causing Makoto's discomfort, Izuru will be bothering everyone about it until they get the art right. (They probably wouldn't trust him enough to let him make the propaganda himself, especially if we're treating the anime as canon.)

If and when Makoto starts to gain weight as a result of Izuru's treatment, Izuru makes sure that he never feels self-conscious about it.

Naekusaba

For this one, I'm imaging Junko playing a role. Like, maybe when Makoto skips meals or just is hungry in general Junko says that he looks better than usual, and she comments on it like he's gorging himself when he does eat a normal amount. And Mukuro knows what she's doing and eventually has to actually make the decision to push back.

I don't have too much more for that, but it's already a pretty big deal to have her speak out against what Junko's doing, so.

Once she takes that step, she's a more militant (and also clumsier) version of Izuru's negative reinforcement strategy. She doesn't have as precise an understanding of what things make Makoto feel bad, so she's not saying or doing anything to guys who happen to be shirtless around Makoto, but she'll hold a knife to someone's throat for saying the word "fat" in a completely normal way/context.

Also I imagine her as more submissive toward Makoto than Izuru is, so where Izuru would be like, "Eat some more," when Makoto is about to stop eating, Mukuro would be more like, "Is that...all you're eating?" But both result in Makoto picking up his utensils again.

Naezono

Bringing this up just to say that I think that, as a person in the entertainment industry, Sayaka has perhaps also at some point had a less-than-healthy relationship with food, and seeing her own struggle mirrored in Makoto (and vice versa, for him) might help them both kind of climb out of it. She's encouraging him to eat by pretty literally cheering him on, and by doing the same herself. The yandere element comes into play only if someone directly insults Makoto, in which case Sayaka will smile politely and very sweetly post to all her social media that the person called her fat. They'll be getting death threats and other cruel DM's for the rest of their lives. #[ThatPerson]IsOverParty

Naehiro

Similar deal with Chihiro. They're both about to tackle their body dysphoria. It's very sweet, very healing. And if someone ever insults Makoto, Chihiro's challenging them to a physical fight (because I really think the "I want to get stronger!" thing would come out of them in weird ways, for a while). Similar to Mukuro, Chihiro would be shy and awkward about encouraging Makoto to eat, but it would be effective regardless.

Naegiri/Naegami/Tonaegiri/Naegamigiri

Ngl, I feel like Kyoko and Byakuya would be kinda bad at handling this, but in a way I find funny.

Like, Kyoko would notice Makoto's eating habits just as a matter of course, and Byakuya would notice it in an "I took you to this expensive restaurant and you barely ate anything!" way.

And if/when Makoto opens up about his feelings, I feel like both of them would be un-equipped to engage with them in a sensitive way. If he says he's insecure about how he looks, they'd pretty much be like, "Why? That's stupid. Stop being stupid." Any hint of Makoto being insecure or unhappy makes them (I think Byakuya more so than Kyoko) kind of frustrated that they don't know how to alleviate that. They don't really know how to give a great compliment. They'll tell him he looks good, and they'll say or imply that they're attracted to him, but they're simply not speaking Nagito's language.

Yandere-wise, probably the best they can do is seize control of the images he sees. So, they'll smack a magazine right out of his hand, change the channel when he's watching a superhero movie, etc. And he'll be hearing a lot of "Eat." "Finish eating." "You're not done." "You're not getting up until you finish that."

[lifeisabiscuit]

Darling.

Finally finished my first acotar fic. It's a Tamsand fic based on Rhys going to visit Tamlin in fas. I hope everyone likes it, I'm super nervous lol.

Link to AO3 or read below. Happy reading!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/58618741

Sitting in chairs too delicate for either one of them, Rhysand crossed his legs while staring at the blonde male in front of him.

“Well? What do you want Rhysand?” Tamlin asked, folding his arms.

Rhys glanced at the arms and shoulders of the other male, noting the loss of muscle “I just thought I’d come by and have a little chat”

“Since when do we chat Rhysand? Usually you just invade minds and make threats.”

Rhys smirked “Thought I’d switch it up today. Though, it's no fun riling you up without an audience. Speaking of which, I’m surprised Lucien isn’t standing outside the door waiting to fight your battles for you.””

Glaring, Tamlin said “He’s out hunting dinner for us. Not that I need him here. I can handle you on my own Rhysand”

“I’m sure you can. You used to handle me quite well . After the first couple times of course” Rhys smirked.

“Shut up Rhysand” Tamlin snapped, trying not to think of what Rhysand was alluding to “that was a long time ago. What do you really want?”

Rhys sighed “Not interested in a walk down memory lane Tamlin? Fine. What’s this I hear about you not protecting your borders?”

Tamlin stared at him then waved his hand “Do you see anyone here to do it?”

Rhys smirked “Ah yes. My mate sure did her job well, didn’t she”

Tamlin snorted “With plenty of instruction from you I’m sure. Or did you just use your special powers to control her?”

“Come now darling, do you really think that low of me?”

“Yes, I do. And don’t call me that Rhysand” Tamlin growled

“And why not? That’s what I used to call you. Don’t you remember, my darling? Back when you were following me around like a puppy and worshipping the ground I walked on. When I was sneaking into your tent in your Daddy’s war camp and teaching you everything you didn’t know. Surely you haven’t forgotten”

Tamlin glowered and looked to the floor while a hint of a blush showed on his cheeks at the mention of their previous encounters “Don’t call me what you call her.”

“Jealous are we? Don’t worry Tamlin, you’ll always be my first darling. Just like I was your first-“

“Stop. Stop bringing up the past. It means nothing”

“on the contrary pet, it means everything. You ruined my life the day you betrayed me and got my family killed. And then you abused my mate. I’ll never forget it and I’ll never let you forget it. I will haunt you everyday of your life. You’ll never know when I’ll come. You will pay for what you’ve done”

Gripping the arms of his chair, Tamlin gritted “haven’t I paid enough? You killed my brothers and your father murdered my mother. Was that not enough payback for you? Your actions forced me to be high lord something you knew I didn’t want and wasn’t prepared for and you left me alone! Not to mention all your sick games when you were working for Ama- for her. And then you stole my fiancé and turned her against me. Got her to destroy my court for you. You want to talk about harming Feyre? How about everything you did to her under the mountain? Dressing her up practically naked and having her dance for you. Just to make me what? Jealous, angry? Well congratulations, you succeeded. You’ve ruined my life just as much as I’ve ruined yours. The difference is I’ve left you alone and you keep showing up to bother me”

Rhys seethed “Do not speak about my mate. She was Falling apart while you sat there and did nothing! Everything I did was for a reason and she understands that. I didn’t need to turn her against you. You did that yourself.”

“I couldn’t do anything! You know that she was watching everything I did. If I reacted at all it would have been worse for Feyre.”

“and yet you did get her alone and what did you do? Tried to fuck her. Couldn’t keep it in your pants for one night to free your beloved?”

“And where would I have taken her?” Tamlin yelled “I didn’t know the ins and outs of the mountain. Ama-she would have hunted us down even if we had gotten out. And all I did was kiss her. She started undressing me. I thought that was what she needed from me. But you couldn’t even let us have that moment. Then when I’m forced to follow her back all I see is you with your tongue down her throat. You want to bring up the past? Then tell me Rhys, were you jealous? Of her or me? Could you taste me on her tongue? Did it remind you of us? Of how you sought me out and taught me things I had never even dreamed of? That first time we kissed? The first time I let you take me? The times after that?”

Rhys glowered as visions of those times danced around his mind. Feeling his pants tighten as the memories resurfaced, he cursed under his breath as the scent of his arousal filled the air.

Tamlin smirked as the scent hit him “do you still think of it now? Do you picture me underneath you when you fuck her?”

“shut up Tamlin” Rhys gritted out.

“That’s what I thought” Tamlin smirked, standing up “I think it’s time for you to go. Maybe your mate can take care of your little problem”

He walked around the desk and started for the door when Rhysands hand shot out and grabbed his wrist.

Tamlin tried to pull his arm back but Rhys just tightened his grip “let go of me Rhysand”

Gaining his composure, Rhys stood up and quickly grabbed Tamlins other wrist, pulling him closer.

“I don’t think I will Darling “ Rhys crooned “maybe you’re right. Maybe you do cross my mind time to time. Mostly when I have my mate in my favorite position of ours. Remember? Bent over the bed or table so I can see myself pounding in and out of her. Just like I used to watch my cock sink in and out of your tight hole.”

Tamlin, still trying to get out of Rhysands grasp, blushed at the words.

“Blushing Tamlin? Weren’t you the one trying to rile me up with our past escapades? I know you enjoyed it Darling. I remember the way you used to scream my name”

Giving up on getting Rhys to let go, Tamlin muttered “too bad for you, it will never happen again”

“on the contrary, I think it’s going to happen again” Rhys moved both of Tamlins wrists to one hand, putting his other arm around his waist and pulled him against him “right now”

Tamlin shook his head, trying again to step away from Rhys. He stilled when he felt his erection bump against Rhysands.

Rhys leaned in and whispered in his ear “I can tell you want this Darling. You can’t deny it.” Leaning in, he started kissing down Tamlins neck.

Tamlin growled which turned into a moan when Rhys sucked a small mark into his neck “Rhys, please”

Rhys licked at the mark a couple times “please what?”

“Please, I don’t want..” his words cut off with a groan as Rhys took that moment to bite down, hard, on his neck.

Rhys moved the arm on Tamlins waist down to squeeze his ass and moved him closer so their elections bumped again. Tamlin bit his lip to stop the moan that threatened to come out.

“It sure doesn’t feel like you don’t want this. In fact, I think this is what we both need. Now” Rhys snapped and both their clothes were off, folded on the chair across the room “be a good boy and turn around” he said looking Tamlin up and down. He has definitely lost some muscle but he still had the body of a God “hands on the desk”

Tamlin, distracted by the sight of Rhys’ member, hesitated before making a decision and turning around.

Rhys groaned as he took in the glorious sight that was Tamlins ass “gorgeous” he said as he reached out and stroked one cheek. He definitely didn’t lose any definition in this area. Rhys wondered if he were still as tight as he used to be.

“Tell me darling” Rhys said as he groped onto Tamlins ass with both hands, massaging it while pulling apart to get a good look at the sweet hole in between “How many males have taken my spot behind you? Have shoved their cocks into your tight heat?”

Head hanging as he tried not to give in to the pleasure of Rhys just groping him, Tamlin muttered “No one”

“What was that? I couldn’t hear you. Louder, darling” Rhys said as he moved a thumb down to stroke over Tamlins hole, making him shiver.

“No one!” Tamlin said louder “I haven’t been with anyone like that since you”

“Good” Rhys said while lightly moving his thumb “I must admit that I’ve taken many others this way. Not since I’ve met my mate of course. Both males and females, but none have felt like you”. He gently pushed his thumb into the other males entrance, both of them groaning. Rhys at the feeling of tight heat and Tamlin at the sudden feeling of a dry thumb in his ass.

“Rhys…”

“Shh…Relax darling.” Rhys knelt down “let me have a taste”

“Wha-“ Tamlins words cut off with a moan as he felt Rhys open his cheeks wider and lick a stripe over his hole.

Rhys continued to lick around, making it wet before slowly pushing it inside.

Tamlin threw his head back and moaned loudly “Rhys, please” he begged.

Rhys pulled his tongue out, nipping one of Tams cheeks “please what?” he crooned.

Groaning at the loss of contact and the bite, Tamlin pleaded “please…more”

“Gladly my love” Rhys purred as he put his tongue back inside Tamlins furled hole, moving it in and around. Occasionally slipping it out and nibble on his rim, before shoving his tongue deeper.

Tamlin moaned at the feeling of Rhys moving in and out “Oh gods…That feels so.. good”

Rhys continued his actions until he could hear Tamlins breath quicken and his hole tighten.

Tamlin whined as he felt Rhys pull out “Why did you stop?”

Standing up, Rhys grasped his own erection, moving his hand up and down, distributing the slick gathering in the tip of his cock. “Don’t worry, I’ll let you finish if you continue being a good boy. Now” he said as he reached forward with his other hand and turned Tamlins face towards him with his fingers “get my fingers nice and wet so I can continue to play”

Tamlins eyes fluttered shut as he opened his mouth and started sucking hungrily on  Rhys’ fingers.

Rhys continued to stroke himself as he watched Tamlin.

After a minute or 2 of trying not to erupt just from Tamlins hot mouth and feeling that his fingers were sufficiently wet enough, Rhys removed them.

Leaning over and kissing Tamlins spine,  Rhys slid his fingers down to his hole and rubbed them around before slowly moving his pointer finger into Tamlins hot heat.

Though loosened a little by Rhys’ tongue, the younger males breath still hitched at the feeling of the finger moving inside.

Rhys, still leaned over him, added his middle finger feeling Tamlin tighten.

Kissing around his neck and shoulders, Rhys murmured gently “relax, Tam.”

Tamlin took a deep breath and relaxed as he got used to the feeling. The more Rhys moved his fingers, the more pleasure he felt. Soon he was grinding back on his fingers “mmm..Rhys, harder please”.

“Yeah? You like that?”

Tamlin nodded, moaning as Rhys started moving his fingers harder into him.

“You think you can take one more?” Rhys purred

Tamlin nodded “yes! Yes please Rhys” he begged.

Rhys smirked as he knelt down again and licked around where his fingers were pumping in and out. When he felt it was wet enough, he added a third finger.

“Oh gods!” Tamlin cried out at the feeling of fullness he felt just from three of Rhys’ fingers.

Rhys kept plunging his fingers in and out of Tamlin while occasionally licking around his hole.

“Rhys” Tamlin groaned “Rhys, I’m so close again”

Standing up while continuing to pump his fingers in and out of Tamlin, Rhys slowly stood up. He leant down and with a pointed tongue lightly licked a trail from the bottom of Tamlins spine to his neck where he sucked a mark into leaving Tamlin to gasp and moan.

Rhys moved his free hand around and gripped Tamlins member hard around the base, making the other male cry out “Rhys!”

“You’re not going to finish on my fingers. You can cum when I’m buried deep in your ass”

Tamlin panted “Put it in then. I’m ready”

“Patience, darling” Rhys cooed as he removed his fingers from inside and his hand from Tamlins cock “I’m going to need a little help getting more wet before we get to that. Why don’t you be a good boy and put those pretty lips around my cock. Get me nice and wet for you”

Straightening up and turning around, Tamlin made sure to keep eye contact with Rhysand as he slowly kneeled down.

Tamlin licked his lips and reaches out to grab Rhys’ hard member in his hand. He slowly leaned in and kissed fhe tip, making Rhys groan.

“cmon baby”

Tamlin furrowed his eyes at the Nickname but started liking the length of him before taking it into his mouth. He coughed and pulled back as it hit the back of his throat. But he tried again, swallowing down a little at a time before he could finally take the whole thing.

Rhys moaned as he looked down at the other male with his mouth full. He started slowly thrusting “Made for this my darling. With those lips of yours. You look perfect with my cock in your mouth”

Tamlin moaned around the length. Both at the feeling and taste of Rhys and at the praise he was receiving even though a part of him raged at Rhys being in control.

Rhys continued to thrust in and out of Tamlins hot mouth. At some point he gripped the blonde locks to help guide him along until he felt himself get close.

Pulling his member out, Rhys rubbed his tip over Tamlins mouth one more time. He stepped back, looking down at his lover whose hair was messed and eyes glossy. Rhys reached out and stroked a hand down one cheek before saying “Get up, hands back on the desk”

Tamlin rolled his eyes at Rhysands bossy tone but did as he was told. He got up and started to turn around until Rhys reached out and grabbed a hold of his wrist “Wait”

Turning back to face Rhys fully, Tamlin asked “What?”

Rhys was silent as he studied Tamlins face. The furrowed brow, his green eyes, the swollen lips and the flushed cheeks “Beautiful”

Tamlin flushed even more “Shut up”

“Never” Rhys murmured sliding his hand to the back of Tamlins head, fingers tangling in his hair. Rhys pulled him closer “Come here”

Rhys leaned in and softly kissed Tamlin on his mouth, lips still swollen from before. Softly moaning, he kissed harder as Tamlin tentatively grabbed his arm, kissing back.

Licking Tamlins mouth making him open, Rhys deepened the kiss until they were fully making out. Both grabbing onto the other, running their hands across the others body.

When Rhys squeezed Tamlins ass, he broke the kiss with a gasp “Are you going to fuck me or what?”

Rhys growled “With pleasure darling, turn around.”

Tamlin quickly did as he was told, putting his hands back on the desk.

Spitting on his hand, Rhys moved it up and down his cock before placing it onto Tamlins hole. He rubbed it around until he felt Tamlin relax and then he slowly pushed it in.

Both males groaned at the feeling. Rhys at the pleasure of the tight heat and Tamlin at the slight pain of the first cock in his ass in the centuries since he was last with Rhys.

Rhys worked in the first bit before stopping to let Tamlin adjust and to stop himself from losing control at the tightness swallowing his member.

Once he got used to the feeling, Tamlin started shifting his hips back, moving back on Rhysands penis.

Rhys moaned while tightening his hands on Tamlins lithe hips while starting to move deeper.

They both moaned at the feeling of their joining. Rhys continuing to go faster and harder as their cries of pleasure grew louder.

Tamlin could feel he was close as he took his hand off the desk and reached for his throbbing member.

��“Uh uh, put your hands back on the desk Darling. You will cum on my cock and nothing else.”

“I cant” Tamlin breathed while obeying and putting his hands back on the desk “I can’t.. I need to be touched. Please Rhys.”

Rhys stopped moving “its either you cum without touching or I pull out now and leave you wanting”

“No!” Tamlin cried “please. Please don’t stop. I’ll do it”

“you’ll do what, darling?”

“Ill cum on your cock. I wont touch myself. Ill listen”

Rhys smirked and with a smack on Tamlins ass, earning him a gasp and a moan from the other male, he continued thrusting “good boy”

Gripping Tamlins hips, Rhys started slamming into him harder and deeper than before. Looking down and watching himself enter Tamlin over and over, he can’t help but let out a moan at the overwhelming euphoria of being enveloped in his tight heat.

Angling his hips, Rhys knew he hit Tamlins spot when the males claws came out and dug into the desk as he called out his name “Rhys! Right there. Oh gods!”

 Tamlin continued to moan and scratch at the desk as Rhys fucked him harder and faster. Rhys thrusted a few more times until he felt his orgasm coming on.

Feeling that Tamlin was also close by the tightening of his hole, Rhys tightened his grip on his hips “Here it comes Tam. Are you gonna take it all?”

Tamlin, silver gathering in his eyes at the overwhelming pleasure of Rhys taking him, cried out “yes! Yes! Please Rhys!”

“cum with me darling” Rhys said as he continued to hit that spot. A few more thrusts and they both released together. Rhysand emptying himself into Tamlin while he came on the desk he was bent over.

Panting, Rhys leaned over and put his forehead on Tamlins back while he calmed down. A few minutes pass as both males catch their breathe.

Rhys rubbed his hands up and down Tamlins sides as he came down. Already thinking about how long until Lucien came back and if they had time for another round, maybe on the floor, Rhys missed Tamlin tensing up.

Tamlin, coming down from his high and realizing what just happened, what he let happen, started beating himself up over giving in to Rhys again. Tensing up as he already regretted his actions “Get out”

Blinking, Rhys straightened up, softening cock still inside Tamlin “What?”

Sighing and straightening up so Rhys had no choice but to pull out, watching as his seed dripped out of Tamlins rear until he turned around.

Crossing his arms , Tamlin looked blankly at Rhys “I said get out. You got what you’ve come for and now you can leave. “

“Do you always kick your bedmates out as soon as you’re done, Tamlin? Or are you worried we will have some company soon? We must have time for a second round, let’s just go to your room. It’s been a while since I’ve been in there. “

“No, Rhysand. It’s over. This will never happen again”

Staring at Tamlin blankly for a moment before snapping his fingers and having his clothing back on, Rhysand picked at the lint on his shirt “oh I think it will Darling. In fact, why don’t we make this a monthly thing. Every month, I’ll come and have you bend over and let me fuck that tight ass of yours where ever I feel like. Call it reparations for everything you’ve done”

“No. I don’t want to see you again, Rhysand. Don’t come back”

Rhys tsked and stepped closer to Tamlin, Gripping his still naked hips “That’s clearly a lie my love. Was it not you just screaming my name while my cock was inside you? You clearly enjoyed it Darling and you will continue to enjoy it. No one will ever make you feel the way I do. I’ll never leave you alone”

Leaning in, he kissed Tamlin on the lips, biting a little “now be a good boy and clean yourself up before Lucien comes back. We don’t need him seeing my property in all its glory”.

Pulling back and stepping away, Rhys ran his fingers through Tamlins messy blonde hair and stepped back “see you next month my darling” and winnowed away.

[inchidentally]

Why do you think Max f protect Lando like his children? Do you think he does it because he saw how Lando struggled in f1 and couldn't just stand there and watch?? 🤔

oh anon idk how much Lando/Max F lore you know but Max has been Lando's protector from day one. Lando was teeeeeny tiny for his age up until like 19?? so Max was bigger than him up until around then. I'm still learning a lot about them as I go but Max's protective instincts toward Lando run extremely deep. it's why I can't decide if they're more common law husbands, platonic soulmates or each other's weird gamer racing gremlin guardian angels.

I think for me one of the biggest standouts for me about their bond is how much Lando wanted to look after Max when Max left racing for good. because when you read about Max's particular struggles, it's like hearing Lando all over again:

Getting bad results each weekend was just having more of a knock-on effect on my mental health. Normally, I’d say that’s one of my strengths through a championship. That’s how I’ve been able to win titles, I’m able to stay calm under pressure and I don’t let many things get to me but when you have a bad qualifying result and you see guys up there that you know you’re capable of beating, it definitely takes a dig at you inside and it’s been a lot to process throughout the year. -- As soon as more thoughts come into your head, it gets worse, then you start panicking, over-driving, and it all goes wrong. I think a lot of the pressure is in your head, but it does get to a point where it just all piles on you. [source]

it's got to mean the world to have a best mate who can completely and openly identify with exactly what you're feeling - esp since they're each now looking at racing from the inside and the outside.

what I find interesting is that Max was just as much of a hyper competitive kid as everyone who came up through that system and from what I can tell he performed strongly enough to easily assume he could make F1 (but he doesn't seem to have assumed that) so him taking to this tiny kid with all these little quirks who was absolutely dusting boys older than him, idk that's just something special about Max. he comes across as kind of gruff or misanthropic at first but he's extremely emotionally intelligent and self-aware - he's always the one to open up and be vulnerable to Lando and unlike Lando he doesn't squirm or make jokes when things get serious. it sounds like I know the guy super well which obv I don't but idk, it just feels like Max is an easygoing but also extremely loyal guy - especially with Lando.

anyway I'm not enough of an authority on nortrell and if anyone wants to add to this please do <3 but yea

side note I always love how in this video we get a sort of funny confirmation that Max approves of Oscar as temporary guardian of Lando. but then I get a little emotional and serious about that bc Lando has cited precisely Oscar's ability to stay calm and not let things pile on top of him as something he's reminded to do for himself. and that Oscar quickly observed Lando and after only a couple months (or maybe even just a month) as his teammate realized that patience and loyalty are what make Lando feel the most relaxed and comfortable with someone. he's adorable and fun w the friends who make him laugh all the time and swat him down when he gives them attitude. but as a self-described shy kid who's also hyperactive, you can see the difference between Lando alone with Max and Lando with other friends. and well, Oscar spent years before his McLaren contract watching that dynamic so. makes sense he'd get the nod of approval from Lando's closest friend <3

[watercolor-hearts]

Please please please tell me about little Max and his daddy's heartbeat. It's a combination of our favourite things. ❤️

[Ask me about my stories based on the titles]

Aww, yes, it is. 🥺❤

It’s a really old (and kind of forgotten) idea so I needed some time to get my thoughts together about it. I still don’t remember every detail but now I can tell you some things about it.

Lullaby was my second heart-focused idea, the first one was the prompt for this amazing story. I put this idea in the F1 Kinkmeme because I wasn’t brave enough to write it. No regrets, I love that someone actually wrote a story for me based on it. (I have some more heart-related prompts in the second round of Kinkmeme with quite a lot of claims but it doesn't seem like anyone's gonna actually write any of them. 😞)

After putting my first idea in the Kinkmeme, I wanted an idea I could actually write to kind of introduce people to heart-focused stories because back then there weren’t really any in this fandom and I really wanted to write some but didn’t know how, because, you know, when you start writing about something that’s really close to you/important to you, you wanna do it in a way that won’t make people freak out and call you disgusting for it, so I thought I’d do it in a non-sexual way first, to kind of see what people think about it. (Things have changed since then. 😃)

The story itself starts with Daniel and Max cuddling on the couch after a stressful weekend, bad race, maybe there were accidents too, I don’t remember clearly, and Max’s on top of Daniel, his head is on Daniel’s chest, and after a while Max starts tapping a rhythm on Daniel’s upper arm.

“What’s this, Max?” Daniel asks, surprised.

“Your heart, daddy,” Max answers, “It does like this, lub-dub, lub-dub… I like it”

Daniel’s surprised by the “daddy” but tries not to see much into it, it was probably accidental.

“Yeah?” he smiles, petting Max's hair. He can sense some kind of change in Max's behavior. He is more clingy, he doesn't look at Daniel, his speech is different, a bit more child-like. He doesn't know what's going on, so he decides to continue, to see where this conversation will go.

“What do you like about it, baby?”

“Dunno,” Max murmurs, snuggling closer into Daniel’s chest, “Just like it. Lub-dub, lub-dub…” he continues imitating the sound he hears, “Maxy likes daddy's heart.”

Daniel doesn’t need more to figure out that the “daddy” thing wasn't accidental. It’s probably a comfort thing for Max. He lets Max be in his headspace and stops himself from wanting to ask him about it to get to know it. He’ll ask him about it later. Comforting him is more important now.

This is basically how their little & caregiver relationship starts. Daniel realizes that his heartbeat helps Max to calm down after stressful days and now he feels safe enough to regress in front of Daniel and tell him that he likes his heartbeat. Daniel doesn’t know about age regression, he has to do some research and they talk about it with Max, too, so he knows how to help Max and what to do when he regresses.

In this universe Max's main interest is hearts, especially his daddy's heart. But he likes to learn about hearts in general, how they work, things like that. He loves when Daniel reads him heart facts.

Once Daniel surprises Max with taking him to his pre-season medical so he could see how doctors check Daniel's heart and he could ask them questions Daniel can't answer because he's not a doctor. Max's super excited and he can't stop rambling about all the things he's learnt. Seeing his happiness warms Daniel's heart. ❤

Oh and once Daniel surprises Max with a stethoscope so he can play doctor with Daniel and listen to his heart.

And from then on, daddy is Maxy's favorite patient and Maxy is daddy's favorite doctor. ❤

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

In case your ask box is still open for sex questions (CN: mention of CSA)

Do you have any advice on how to reconceptualize yourself as a subject of desire? I was very much raised to consider myself mainly an object of other people’s (straight men’s) desire and this was violently inscribed into me as a child and teenager.

Now I’ve transitioned and I’m being read as male (I guess most people read me as a cis gay guy?) so this object-of-desire messaging has largely stopped. I find this pretty disorienting, both because of the loss of “positive” feedback and because I literally do not know how to be anything BUT an object of desire.

I’m looking for ways to learn what I want, develop intentions and follow through on them but I find this so difficult. Even just communicating about my desire with anyone fills me with existential dread and anxiety. I used to have this self-image of being a slut but after a lot of therapy work I’ve just sort of stopped having sex and I’m a little lost with this.

I wanna do (more) therapy about this but I’d be interested to hear your opinion if you have one!

Thank you so much both for taking the time to read this and for all you’ve shared so far! It has been really helpful and interesting for me!

Oooh great ask! (And my ask box is always open for anything always. If I'm not willing to respond to what I'm sent, I simply won't, or will post a brief "hey this asker, sorry I'm not the right person!" Or whatever lol)

Anyway lets talk about this because I was literally just talking to a partner about this yesterday:

Hmmm. Possibly a disorganized/incoherent thought pattern, but I think as follows: I am accustomed to offering my pleasure and pain to the desires of others and finding pleasure in the giving of power over me. I am left a bit unmoored how to offer service to someone who does not seem to want the power to instruct me in what I am to give, even if other aspects are desireable to you. It will be interesting to learn what it can look like to offer my own desires as service to another I think.

So every time my service top and I fuck, it starts the same way.

Top sits down in the cozy chair and I lay in bed and snuggle up into the blankets. We chitchat until one or both of us brings up an activity we'd like to do. If I bring up an activity, I tend to bring it up based on current interests or recent fantasies. My service top tends to exclusively bring up fantasies I have shared with them in the past.

This is difficult because I am *fucking petrified* of sharing my fantasies with people I fuck. I Do Not Want To Do That.

I understand how silly that sounds given all my tomfoolery recently, but the thing is: what I *want* is kind of fucking dark. Not like. Content wise (okay so sometimes cnc can get content dark too sure fine fuck) but emotionally. I am SUPER aware that the vast majority of my sexual desires are tied, in some way, into the way I blur love and abuse. I was actually talking about this at staff meeting yesterday too, naming for people the cognitive dissonance of needing to defend and normalize something in order to survive while also needing to eliminate it from your life entirely, and the wild swings of instability that can come as you flip between these.

Nothing is more pleasurable to me than pain. Nothing is more erotic than someone choosing to inflict extreme sensations until I sort of....reboot. When Wifey and I first got together, she had to sit me down and explain that while she was happy to play in the fetish with me, she NEEDED me to be able to differentiate between "fetish" and "self-harm using another human being as the harm". This is.....not really something I've mastered.

Cpnversations like this have been really important for me. In the moment that someone demonstrates the capacity to harm(not just hurt, HARM) me, I get intensely turned on. What does this mean psychologically? No fucking clue.

But over the years a few different partners have had some version of this conversation with me "I will happily do what brings you pleasure, but I will not allow you to use me to damage yourself."

It's a hard conversation I'm not gonna lie, but that's because it's important. And it gets to the conversation of object/subject of desire.

See, I have learned that my relationship to self-harming sexual practices was rooted in the inability to believe that I was loved unless I was in pain. Physical pain was genuinely pleasurable, but emotional pain wasn't, and I was utterly unable to tell the difference. The emotional pain caused by partners who were willing to harm me was slotted into the same box in my brain as the physical pain caused by partners who felt violated by realizing they had caused me harm. But it shouldn't have been.

Some people left me. I left others. Little by little I realized as partners came and went that I felt much worse around certain partners and sought sex and pain to stabilize, vs feeling much BETTER around other partners and seeking sex and pain to experience each other intimately.

Now my partners tell me no when I ask for something that they feel concerned about me not being thoughtful of myself in asking. My partners ask me to want things without first giving me parameters in which it is acceptable to want and sometimes I tell them a desire and it is fulfilled and ither times I tell them a desire and it is denied, and ALWAYS WITHOUT FAIL that is done with love.

My service top sits and waits for me to say how I want to be cared for, and if they realize I am unable to, they offer me a safe, pre-negotiated alternative to making a decision. This is power as a gift, not as theft. They take nothing that is not freely given, ever, even when they pin me down and fuck me.

I don't know when all this started turning into a genuine ability to discuss my desires with myself (let alone my partners) but the safety of no (not just mine, but MY PARTNER'S) has been so fucking mission critical to that shift.

So lets name some resonances here:

Self concept as slut despite cyclical episodes of sexual abstinenance and a genuine inability to measure up objectively to many of my best slutty slutty friends and role models

History of subjugation of self and denial of right to your own no

The message that if your partner gives you a no that means something is wrong, rather than embracing and reveling in your mutual right to an un-interrogated no

Difficulty conceptualizing oneself as autonomous in desire rather than an object to have desire enacted upon

Terror of communicating any successfully conceptualized desire secondary to either mistrust of others' ability to genuinely care for us and/or fear of real and perceived abandonment/rejection

Lets name the solutions my partners found:

Establish boundaries with me that both expect and REQUIRE me to be capable of identifying and expressing boundaries of my own

Collaboratively build a process of repair following a no that acknowledges both the distress of the rejection and the need for a boundary to not be crossed or pressured

Practice wanting - this is obvi gonna be different for everyone, but my partners have established a lot of different ways they ask me to practice wanting a thing and expressing the want to them in a low stakes environment

Recognizing that "wanting" and "continuing to want" are not inherent bedfellows, and often I will need to back out of a thing I wanted

Learning how to reconnect with my body - we really haven't talked about this one yet, but my relationship with embodiment is......bad. i have had suicidal levels of dysphoria since I was nine years old for a number of reasons, some related to gender, others to chronic health conditions, others secondary to physical abuse, and still others secondary to the coercive/traumatizing medical practices inflicted on my throughout childhood. I am largely incapable of remaining present in my body for more than about 30min at a time and this level of grounding has taken LITERAL DECADES to manage. Sex has gone from a way I further inflict this harm on myself to a way I learn to love and safely experience my body. The more memories I build of safe/secure pleasure, satisfaction, comfort, coexistence, etc, the more it feeds into and nourishes my trauma recovery. After all, how can I know how to want anything if I can't even feel its effect on me? Whether or not I enjoyed the experiment? My partners have each found their own way, through a careful balance of pain, communication, pleasure, withdrawal, etc., to keep me anchored in my body with them enough for it to ACTUALLY BE SAFE to fuck me or play with me. Friend, for 17years I thought I couldn't have an independent orgasm. In the last 2 years since a few major milestones of embodied restoration, I have managed a half dozen on my own, and am now near guaranteed orgasm with a partner. While I still ENJOY an overstimulation/lack of control induced orgasm, it has ceased to be my only option for pleasure, and I can't tell you how much that changes things

This got super long and my brain went all over so I hope I haven't gotten too confusing or off track here but I think the TLDR is probably this:

TLDR: for those of us whose subjugation was multi-layered and/or all-encompassing, we may simply never be done processing the ways in which we learned to subjugate ourselves in a desperate and subconscious attempt to survive. This sounds terrifying when you first encounter the idea. If you can persist long enough, it will begin to taste like freedom. Just because the panopticon lives inside us doesn't mean we have to help it continue to abuse us once our jailers have gone from our world. The fear is old and comes from a time when someone could and would harm you and you lacked any recourse. That time is dead, but you are not. For years you made yourself into the image of a survivor. Now you must learn how to make yourself in the image of someone who is truly living. You have never known any terror so strong as freedom in your whole life. You will never know a greater joy than abandoning that terror in the dust bin of your history. I love you. What happened should never have happened. It is part of you, and every day you persist that part becomes less meaningful as it is subsumed by the experiences of loving and being loved with abandon. You have survived. You will do so much more. I love you, but it doesn't matter. I love you and it's the most important thing in the world. I love you and I will never need to know you to justify that. I will still love you when I know you. I don't matter because this only ever deserves to be about you. You are alive. You are a glorious accident the world will never see again. You could not possibly be forgotten.

We will all be forgotten.

To be forgotten is to have been loved deeply enough to grow away from and to have changed enough to become something new.

If the void calls eternal, than why not revel in the Noise And Joy of Living before it comes for us

[issteelballrunconfirmed]

good morning/evening tumblr user issteeleballconfirmed 😇 i’ve been holding my tongue on this bc i 1) didn’t wanna seem like a total dweeb (idgaf anymore) and 2) idk if anyone has mentioned this BUUUUUUUTTTTTT… also this is super long so feel free to ignore but i thought you would find it interesting (is that the right word)

according to my research 🤓. parts 3,5 and 6 were all spaced out and dropped within a year of each other (part 4 was released fully in a few months- like april to december of ‘16 i believe). after each part fully drops, there’s a two year space difference between them before the other part drops, ex.

sdc- 2014-2015

diu- 2016

gw- 2018-2019

so: 2021-2022

MEANING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! as long as we stay positive (or delusional) , steel ball run SHOULD be hopefully confirmed sometime in the near future..but, i do however think this part will break the two year pattern (minus the one year space between sdc and diu) .. BUT THEY WILL BE REAL! thank you for reading, if you did, and i’d love to hear any thoughts/comments/opinions :33

hi! don’t worry about sending long asks, i will read them (i’ll answer the other asks in my inbox too, just been busy)!

i do think you’re right about SBR breaking the two year wait cycle though, there’s been a lot of changes to how the jojo anime is produced throughout the past few years (batch releases, producers leaving and dying) that could stretch production time out, never mind the sheer amount of work that animating horses constantly is gonna take. much of SBR happens on horseback, so as you can imagine it’s going to take so much longer for it to be animated at the same quality of other parts. still, i think it definitely is possible!

[cerealboxlore]

i personally really like the idea of cap remembering the lives of past champions a lot

but like if he remembers those lives as his own then he’d have technically have killed before since back in the past champions times that would’ve been pretty normalised (also adam)

so i think it’d be pretty fun if cap mentions that he has killed before, whether it’s offhandedly or if someone says that he is one of the few who don’t kill and he admits that he has

or maybe even someone who does kill saying he doesn’t understand what it’s like to kill and his reaction to that

i’d love to see the angst it all gives billy

i actually love both billy who has killed and billy who hasn’t (honestly i love anything involving my boi)

like billy who has killed is great for him killing ebenezer (i honestly don’t even want him to kill anyone else just don’t like that guy)

but on the other hand billy who’s super against killing but technically has is a great source of angst

a billy who didn’t kill ebenezer because it goes against his values but then he becomes the champion gaining their memories and regrets it

a billy who struggles to seperate them from himself at times

a billy who desperately tries to hang onto his memories because otherwise all he’s done, all he’s believed in, becomes worthless

this can also be tied into my other angst idea where mary “dies” just to add some more flavourful trauma to the child ya know

I'm taking some time off with my assignments to finally answer my inbox mail and I am so excited to answer this one!!

Cap remembering the past lives he's lived through is such an incredible source of story potential and angst material that it's unbelievable there's not much content for this. 100% on board with the idea that cap has indeed killed before, and the only thing that holds him back or pushes him forward to kill is his host. The host connects him to what he will be and what morals he will have in that lifetime. It's really interesting and fun to play around with! Especially with cap having formerly been one with Black Adam before, that is an entire Rollercoaster of angst and emotions the two could go through together after having been the same person (technically) before.

As For A version of Billy who is not above murder and the other who isn't, these two interpretations of Billy are both good to me! Personally, I enjoy reading about a Billy Batson who doesn't see death as an option for punishment/last resort. He'd find another way to fix things, another way to offer redemption if possible, to prove his pure of heart soul. One that influences cap to not kill and bind him to the goodness in the world.

However.

Ebeneezer deserves a long walk off a short pier. Into a volcano. On another planet. That gets sucked into a black hole.

I'd honestly really would enjoy a fic where Billy desperately wants Ebeneezer to pay for his actions and crimes, but is too pure of heart to do what he wants to do. Cap hearing the voice of Billy's deepest and darkest thoughts and bringing them to life without Billy knowing, killing off Ebeneezer in an indrect way. A bit like the SQUIP from "Be More Chill" the musical.

I also really enjoy the concept of Billy having dreams about caps past lives, allowing him to peer through lifetimes of knowledge during a single night and view his predecessors for wisdom. However, it quickly turns into nightmares, as life comes with death, and the endless pain and suffering that he sees are horrors beyond his mortal comprehension, especially for a young child. Memories that arent his, haunting him, taunting him, making him feel scared and worthless. Different morals and personalities all clashing together to scream at Billy for what he does and doesn't do as the new Champion of Magic. Resulting in him coming to his classes exhausted and ending up sleeping during class, pushing forth a need to call his guardian, good ol' Uncle Dudley, to help save the day and help calm Billy down. I know Uncle Ebeneezer has traumatized Billy, but I believe Uncle Dudley will help Billy heal. He's not magical, but he's a better uncle than anyone else.

Billy truly is his own person, but with the constant stream of voices flooding his mind and dreams with their own opinions of how he should live HIS life is very intriguing. It could go further into his identity issues when growing up and cause some inner turmoil for him to resolve. I do love traumatizing this small child 💖

Bonus: the memories Billy relives through his dreams haunting him to the point they gain a portion of control over his subconscious, bullying him with forced remembrance of Mary's "death" in order to make him complacent and obedient to the morals of the former lives. An interesting antagonist/villain for a story. Maybe cap and Billy would have to pull an Avatar Korra and erase the former Champions and other lives' memories in order to bring peace to Billy.

[midnightsun-if]

Hi! I just want to say right off the bat that this isn’t a criticism or an attack on you in any way. I absolutely adore the world and characters you’ve created, and you seem like a delightful person based on how you respond to asks.

Anyways, I love Scarlett. My favorite archetype of all time is the Ice Queen with a hidden heart of gold. When I first found this if, she was the one I wanted to romance the most. Then I found out she’s gender locked and I’m not gonna lie, I was pretty disappointed. It just kinda sucks when one of the most popular romance options isn’t available to you, you know? It’s not like you can just ignore them either, they’re still gonna be present in the story and since they’re super popular a lot of the asks are gonna be about them too. I know I can always just create a female MC just to romance her, but it just doesn’t feel genuine to me.

If I had to guess, I’d say that that’s probably why a lot of people are simping for Cienna (even though I personally am not really interested). They share a lot of the same characteristics, and as far as I know, Cienna doesn’t have a set sexuality which means anyone can romance her (in this hypothetical game where she’s a romance option).

I guess at the end of the day I’m just curious why you decided to make only two of the romance options exclusive when the rest of the cast is more fluid. Again, I’m really not trying to sound insulting or like I’m attacking you, I’ve been following this blog since the very first post and I’ll still be a fan no matter what you do. I’m just a little disappointed and was curious to hear your thought process. Thanks!

A lot of my reasonings actually tie into her backstory (or a couple big ones, I should say)— so I can’t really go into that, but I will say that Scarlett, like Koda, just didn’t fit with the more fluid archetype like the other ROs. I knew that there’d be a possibility that same readers would either get turned off Midnight Sun because of that or grow annoyed due to it (not saying that you are, of course).

My choice mainly just boiled down to me understanding Scarlett, who she is, and what her sexuality means to her in a sense (I suppose). I settled on it because I felt, in my heart, that it was what was best for Scarlett, and what would make her character ring the most true (if that makes sense). Originally, she was going to be gender selectable, but I just didn’t connect well with the character and couldn’t figure out why— until I started writing for just Scarlett and fleshing out her backstory and the various nuances that make her who she is. In fact, the original character that Scarlett was is so far removed from who she is now that it’s almost a different person altogether. I’m happy with how much Scarlett has evolved and it may seem dumb to some people, but a lot of that had to do with figuring out her sexuality and what would overall work for her and for her involvement in Midnight Sun altogether.

I just decided to do what was best for the story, for Scarlett, and honestly for a lot of peoples reading experience in general, because if I felt disconnected from my character, I couldn’t imagine how you all would have felt interacting with said character.

And I know you’re not trying to be insulting at all! You’re curious, which is completely understandable. I hope that some of my reasons make sense in the grand scheme of things— I wish I could go into more of deeper ones, but I don’t want to spoil anything. Hopefully this’ll be enough to satiate some of said curiosity though! ❤️

[pvffinsdaisies]

May I hear more about your Fem! Finland? She sounds interesting, and I also portray my Finland as a woman 👀

Sure you can! ✨ I’m sooo happy to hear you’re interested in my silly little OC portrayals. And also especially relieved to hear you also see finny as a woman, I always get nervous talking about it due to some sexist comments I received last year for preferring female fin.

I won’t get into that!

Anyway, since I wrote so little about them last time, I thought I’d give you a list of my headcanons for Aino. Free to steal if you’d like, and if you have any headcanons for fem! Fin I encourage you to send me them. 😌✨🇫🇮.

Aino is an animal lover through and through, she loves all animals and is pretty knowledgable on most animal species that live in her country. She has a huge admiration and respect for bears especially. However, her favourites are by far birds. She’s such a bird nerd, she owns many books on them, she loves bird watching, and she actually makes and puts up bird houses in her garden every spring time.

She has a Finnish lapphund as a pet. She’s white, and her name is “lumi”, which means snow in Finnish.

They’re a bit of an old soul, in a sense. They older “old” people hobbies, like fishing, knitting and long walks. Aikkuli finds she needs slower moments in life to wind down and appreciate some of the simpler things.

However, they need to have their fast paced hobbies too, the things that make them feel alive. They’re a huge fan of ice hockey, but they also love rally driving, and can actually ride a motorcycle.

Speaking of rally, Aino loves cars! They’re so fascinated by them, they’re the type to ask someone 10 million different questions about what type of car they drive, they find it interesting

She adores moomin! Has a whole collection of moomin mugs. The animated series from the 90s is her comfort show, and they’re constantly relating things happening in real life to something that happened in either the moomin books, or in the show.

Aikkuli really enjoys skiing, and due to their competitive nature, they get upset when left out of “who’s the best nordic at skiing” debates, even though objectively, they’re not as good at Sweden, and especially not as good as Norway.

Whilst they can’t see creatures, Aino is still quite interested in her old pagan beliefs, and owns a Kalevala, and other books about old Finnish mythology. In modern day, they’re not entirely sure what their religion is, but they also don’t often sit down and actually ponder it.

Their secret talent is that they know how to dance! They’re quite good at ballroom type stuff, but their skills don’t really translate to other forms. She’s a little embarrassed by this, and doesn’t like to tell or show people that often.

Whilst Aino is a very independent woman, who’s not super lenient on anyone, they can be really clingy with Estonia. Often choosing to hang around with Eesti as often and they possibly can. Sometimes it may feel like it’s a bit much, but truth be told? Estonia sometimes feels like their only genuinely close friend they can undoubtably trust.

Fin easily lets their competitive nature get the better of her, and it’s not uncommon for her to take it too far. Especially if Sweden is involved. Be cautious to play anything against both Sweden and Finland. If Aikkuli wins, they will not stop bragging and rubbing it in sve’s face for the rest of the week, and if they lose they can sometimes became extremely resentful. The atmosphere will be cold for a while afterwards.

Aikkuli lives for heavy metal music, they probably listen to some songs from other genres too, but is absolutely a metal head first and foremost. She goes to heavy metal gigs and concerts as often as they can. And they definitely blast their music as loud as they want when they’re in their car.

Ahh! There we go! Sorry this took a while to respond to, I don’t really touch Aino all that much so it can be hard for me to just list things about them on the spot. I have sooo many thoughts about them, but I always struggle to type them out. I partially blame the hiatus I took from her character, it feels like I’m tugging hard to get her off the shelf, but they don’t wanna move 😅😅

[prpfz]

Rewatching Avatar (2009/2022) has really inspired me and I’d loveee to play about with it, but do something slightly different with an ocxoc rp! I’ve been thinking about other clans and I’d love to play about with the idea of a cave Na’vi clan/population! I have some ideas on how they might look, their biology, their culture, how the caves might actually form, different animals, etc etc but I’d love to brainstorm and flesh out the world with you so we can both create it together! Plot wise, I’m thinking something along the lines of me playing one of these cave Na’vi, and you playing either a normal na’vi from another clan that somehow gets lost amongst the caves and stumbles upon my one, or perhaps you’re a human researcher - maybe just researching the environment and the caves and unaware of the na’vi underground, or specifically are looking for them too. Those are just a couple of ideas but we can chat together to figure something out and I’d love to hear your thoughts!

About me: I’m 21+, looking for anyone 19+ to write with. I’m a very detailed writer and my replies are usually around the realm of 1000 words (not characters!) and can go up to 2000 easily as well. I would like my partner to be able to match this. Not every reply has to be super long of course, it depends what’s going on and quality > quantity, but with all the world building I’d love to do and fleshing out nuanced characters, I don’t want to write paragraphs setting everything up for us to be given 1 that doesn’t move the plot forward:’). I can offer a writing sample and might ask for one to make sure we’re compatible because I will lose interest in short, semi-lit style writing, sorry. I love depth and complexity, fleshed out characters with flaws, situations that demand action that’s not 100% morally good. I love conflict and tension, hurt/comfort, angst and recovery, and I love seeing characters grow over the rp! I’m open to all types of pairings and trans characters, and also open to different takes on gender identity/expression considering the na’vi aren’t human! I’m open to dark topics, violence, and nsfw, but I’m open to fading to black and don’t rush/prioritise smut, nor do I like really strict roles like sub/dom and top/bottom. I reply usually a few times a week but can’t manage daily most of the time, and I won’t rush you either! I like to chat ooc and send art/aesthetics/tiktoks and bond with my partner, but I won’t push if you’re not comfortable with it.

I’d love a partner who’s down to world build and plot with me! Bring your own ideas and concepts and we can make a world and story together! I want to do it together, with you! So please don’t just say “sounds good, up to you” to everything I say lol:’) This is way too long now so I’ll round it out, but leave a like and I’ll reach out to you! 💙🌙

give a like and anon will get back to you

[novella-writers]

Rewatching Avatar (2009/2022) has really inspired me and I’d loveee to play about with it, but do something slightly different with an ocxoc rp! I’ve been thinking about other clans and I’d love to play about with the idea of a cave Na’vi clan/population! I have some ideas on how they might look, their biology, their culture, how the caves might actually form, different animals, etc etc but I’d love to brainstorm and flesh out the world with you so we can both create it together! Plot wise, I’m thinking something along the lines of me playing one of these cave Na’vi, and you playing either a normal na’vi from another clan that somehow gets lost amongst the caves and stumbles upon my one, or perhaps you’re a human researcher - maybe just researching the environment and the caves and unaware of the na’vi underground, or specifically are looking for them too. Those are just a couple of ideas but we can chat together to figure something out and I’d love to hear your thoughts!

About me: I’m 21+, looking for anyone 19+ to write with. I’m a very detailed writer and my replies are usually around the realm of 1000 words (not characters!) and can go up to 2000 easily as well. I would like my partner to be able to match this. Not every reply has to be super long of course, it depends what’s going on and quality > quantity, but with all the world building I’d love to do and fleshing out nuanced characters, I don’t want to write paragraphs setting everything up for us to be given 1 that doesn’t move the plot forward:’). I can offer a writing sample and might ask for one to make sure we’re compatible because I will lose interest in short, semi-lit style writing, sorry. I love depth and complexity, fleshed out characters with flaws, situations that demand action that’s not 100% morally good. I love conflict and tension, hurt/comfort, angst and recovery, and I love seeing characters grow over the rp! I’m open to all types of pairings and trans characters, and also open to different takes on gender identity/expression considering the na’vi aren’t human! I’m open to dark topics, violence, and nsfw, but I’m open to fading to black and don’t rush/prioritise smut, nor do I like really strict roles like sub/dom and top/bottom. I reply usually a few times a week but can’t manage daily most of the time, and I won’t rush you either! I like to chat ooc and send art/aesthetics/tiktoks and bond with my partner, but I won’t push if you’re not comfortable with it.

I’d love a partner who’s down to world build and plot with me! Bring your own ideas and concepts and we can make a world and story together! I want to do it together, with you! So please don’t just say “sounds good, up to you” to everything I say lol:’) This is way too long now so I’ll round it out, but leave a like and I’ll reach out to you! 💙🌙

Like if interested!

[futurequibblerjournalist]

I really really hope it's alright if I ask like,,, a 2n1

So 1st of all if Charity is like as obsessed w her friends as you make it sound,, do u think she's ever introduced them to Igor or vice versa?? If so what do you think it was like??

And for pt2 electric boogaloo LOL um I would really like to hear about your Avery :33 I hope thats alright

Aghhhh sorry for so many words and like,,,, anons,,,, you're literally flooded Nd I feel so bad for making more AGHH but I just love your blog

-Weed Anon LOL 🍃

Tw: talk of alcoholism and eating disorders further down.

You can ask all you'd like I promise I'm loving all the questions!! I feel very Debbie Ryan tucking hair behind her ear knowing you like my blog so much vjfnbjgnb

I don't think there's a universe where Charity doesn't introduce Igor to her friends. Perhaps a little sooner than she should sometimes too. I think they all react quite differently too.

Wilhelm would be all “oh my god you’ve got a boyfriend how exciting!” and then seconds later he’s all “is he really good for you though? Such a violent brute, if I were you I’d be worried he’d hurt me! What a horrible thought!” We’ve already established that Wilhelm and Igor do not get along and Igor would hate hate hate to have to be near him.

Aurora would be excited on her behalf but it would be very lowkey. She also doesn’t get the whole congrats on relationships sort of thing but she’d be happy that Charity is happy. I’m not sure how they’d react to each other, honestly I don’t think Aurora would say a whole lot to him but she’d have a little chat with Charity later on.

Severus already knows Igor, they’ve got a weird kind of friendship in a similar way as to how Severus and Charity has a bit of a weird sort of friendship as well. Severus got assigned to be Igor’s little transfer student buddy when he first got to Hogwarts and the two just sort of chill around each other tho Igor does annoy Sev more times than not lmao (I also have thoughts about these two in the context of shipping them soooo if you ever wanna hear about that ask me about crownest lmaooo). I’m not sure he’d care all that much but perhaps he might be in the group of surprised people because like,, look at them lmao

I don’t imagine Bruce to be particularly close with Charity so I don’t see him getting directly introduced though I do see him sharing a dorm room with Edmund and Edmund being the little complaining bitch he is would totally mention it. He’d probably be in disbelief at first and second he’d be a bit jealous because anyone with eyes can see that Charity is gorgeous though I doubt the feeling would last

Edmund is an interesting case. Charity thinks they’re besties but in reality Edmund has a fear for women and he would really just like to avoid Charity. She just doesn’t let that happen. Edmund also does not care for Igor. He thinks he’s stupid and obnoxious and loud and it’s incredibly unfair that Severus now shares a room with him after being assigned as his little Hogwarts buddy because Severus shared a room with Edmund first!!! (My all time favourite Sev ship is Sev and Edmund and with crownest also being a thing sometimes,,, well, let’s just say Edmund sometimes had a lot of reasons to not like Igor). Edmund’s main reaction to being told they’re dating is just “and I should care.. why??” Charity would giggle and say he’s silly and pat his shoulder and Edmund would wiggle off to the Slytherin showers like some worm while considering if he should burn the part of his uniform that she touched.

Look at this super fun sexy segue into the second question. Very mindful very demure.

My Edmund is to put it lightly a little bitch lmao. There’s so much to him. He’s a homophobic homosexual who’s engaged to an equally homophobic lesbian. He’s afraid of women and yet considers himself so much better and purer because he’s abstained from being with one for so long.

He grew up an only child in a Jewish home and he is a complete mummy’s boy. He copied his father in every way possible and he’s the spitting image of the man except for his mother’s light hair and her eating disorder. He dresses like he’s from a time twenty years ago and he speaks like he’s from the 1800s. He calls his fiancee a church bell and probably also a hedge-creeper. He wore round glasses and his hair slicked back like his father’s and his body is riddled with beauty marks. Picture Harold Lloyd with beauty marks and you’ve got him honestly.

He thinks he’s better than everyone else. Like the slippery little snake he is he constantly manages to escape trouble. His father has taught him that you are only as powerful as those you associate with and Edmund sticks to that so much!! This is seen in canon with how he evades getting thrown in Azkaban by claiming he was under the imperius case and getting away with it. Only when Voldemort rises again does he return to him because now power is once again within reach. It’s unknown whether or not Edmund escapes the second war without getting captured but I would not be surprised if he did.

It’s also noted in canon that he had an evil sense of humour seen with how he and Bruce tormented Mary together to the point of Lily bringing it up to Severus. In his adult life he’s cowardly and weak and slightly incompetent though I don’t think these are his only traits. I think those are just the ones that come out when he’s in a situation where he’s under pressure. Interestingly both Sirius and Lily have spoken about him with less disdain than they have for his remaining friends which makes me assume they does not consider him as much of a threat and perhaps more so a bother which honestly I think is so funny.

His favourite subjects in school were Arithmancy and Ancient Runes and he was an obnoxious know it all when it came to both. He’s got the most horrendous unreadable cursive writing that he got from his father and Slughorn curses to himself every time he’s got to correct his homework. He would carry around thick books everywhere he went and the fact that this kid was considered popular in any capacity is wild, but he had an aura of confidence and entitlement that allowed him to get away with much more than he should have been able to.

He was a whiny child, always sticking to his mother’s side rather than playing with other children despite his father having plenty of friends with kids he could have played with. He’d rather drink tea with his mummy or play in the pool with her. He hated getting dirty and still does and would come crying to his mother after getting a paper cut as if someone had chopped off part of his finger. He remained close with his mother for all of her life but their relationship was tainted by her alcoholism as he grew older and realised what was going on. Still, he named his first daughter after her.

And then there’s his relationship with Severus and his homosexuality of course which is,, oof that’s a whole other bag of worms. Maybe we’ll come back to that cause oh boy I’ve done it again this is so long lmao. Maybe once I’ve found a shipname for these two we can come back to them I can’t keep calling them emofaggot and calling it a day lmaoooo

Thank you so much for the asks and the kind words!!

[ellascreams]

You know I frequently think about what Magnus Archive entities different characters from things would be warlocks for but I don’t think I’ve ever really talked about any of my thoughts on it before. Maybe I should start doing that, just for fun. Someone might find it interesting. This one is for IEYTD because I don’t expect this hyperfixation to die very soon. Spoilers for all the games. Oh and if you want to use this as inspiration for some weird crossovers you can, but please tell me if you do, because I wanna see it.

Agent Phoenix: The End This one is especially fitting if you think of the time loops as being in universe, stuck dying again and again, but it works even without that. Constantly close to death, feeling the fear of death, but never actually dying. Causing others fear because their friends have to deal with grief and their enemies have to be terrified every time they survive something they shouldn’t have. You could make an argument for The Beholding, you can for most protagonists, but it doesn’t make as much sense to me.

Handler: The Beholding He watches his agents do such dangerous things and can’t do much more than watch. He can help in someways but not too many. I imagine it would also be uncomfortable for Zoraxis agents to know they’re being watched by someone who they can’t see, someone other than the agent in front of them. Alternatively, he could be The Web. (“A mere puppeteer, they only enslave you,”) I just don’t think that works as well since he also has to answer to The Agency and he doesn’t have any malicious intent with his manipulations.

Dr. Zor: The Web Constantly orchestrating schemes from the shadows, has no loyalty to anyone and will kill their highest ranks without remorse if they interfere with their plans, too clever to ever be caught, and knows what Phoenix will do well enough to leave messages for them. Could also make arguments for The Stranger, The Beholding, The End, and The Extinction, but I think all of those connect back to their plotting and masterminding.

Daniel Sans: The Corruption Very minor character but I felt like adding him here. He made a super virus. That’s it that’s all I’ve got.

Zoraxis AI: The Buried Specifically the one in the escape pod. Does this even count as a character? No idea, but you can’t tell me that escape pod doesn’t sound like it would be the subject of someone’s statement if they got out of it alive.

Hivemind: The Corruption He’s literally just bees. Like, a bunch of bees. His name is Hivemind. What else can I even say?

Solaris: Uh The Vast Maybe? Because space? I’ll be honest I’m not really sure about this one, if anyone has any ideas I’d love to hear them.

The Fabricator: The Desolation She seems to enjoy the pain she causes with her inventions, whereas some of the scientists in game seem more like they’re just hurting people for the sake of their science. I’d also definitely accept The End for her since death traps are kind of her main thing.

John Juniper: The Stranger He’s got the masks, the acting and lying, he impersonates people, it seems like a perfect fit honestly. I guess he could maybe work for The Spiral but that’s mostly because it’s so similar to The Stranger.

Gibson: The Beholding Ok this one might sound a bit weird but hear me out. Phoenix pretends to be Gibson for a reason, his radio allows him to eavesdrop and he probably does eavesdrop just so he won’t miss Juniper’s commands. Gibson is just a butler, but he hears all about these worldwide conspiracies and gets caught in the crossfire, and there really isn’t much he can do about it. Except threatening to share the things that he’s heard, which is very affective, because he’s heard a lot of important secrets.

Shawn in HR: The Beholding Honestly he really does give me archive assistant or object storage vibes. Just doing his job hearing about and sorting the horrors. The big difference is that the horrors in this situation are corporate espionage and conspiracies.

Dr. Prism: The Extinction Ok once again, this may seem a bit weird, but hear me out. Her main goal in game is to replace the agents with robots and there is an element of humanity being replaced to The Extinction, not just everyone dying. Then there’s Zor’s betrayal destroying all her robots at once. Then she helps Phoenix save all the agents in the world from death. Even if it’s never an extinction of humanity she certainly has experience with extinctions. An alternate might be The Hunt because of her obsession with revenge and killing Phoenix or Zor, and the Agency trying to track her down.

Robutler: The Stranger or The Spiral He just seems so friendly and happy to talk to you while he attempts to kill you.

Ollie: The Lonely I swear this isn’t just because Ollie’s voice reminds me of Alexander J Newall’s. The poor guy just got abandoned in the ocean for like at least a month. His coworkers and bosses seem to be pretty mean to him too.

Director Morales: The Web He really is just running The Agency behind the scenes. We really don’t hear much about him orchestrating anything but maybe that’s just because he’s really good at it. Out of all these characters, he would probably be the creepiest to me if he was actually a warlock for an entity.

The Phantom: The Web We really don’t know much about them but they manage to leave coins for Phoenix to find everywhere they go knowing that they’ll find them. Very Web like behavior. Maybe The Hunt. The coin thing is kinda like a scavenger hunt and they do have to track down Phoenix to leave those clues.

[olivieblake]

Hey Olivie!! Hope you’re well :)

I have loved and followed your big sis advice for years now, and I could use some of it now.

I have always been the kind of individual who has really close 1:1 friendships, but has always yearned for a friend group. I’m in my second year of college, and last year, I finally felt belonging with a group of people, but all of them are seniors and have graduated. I know I am a loved human being, but a lot of the people I love most are long distance now, and I feel lonely in my day-to-day life. I always have seemed to get along with people older than me, but my mom put it bluntly: I need friends my age. I can get along with anyone, but in terms of choosing who I actually click with and invest in, it is very few people. My friends who graduated were all individuals who had similar vibes and energy as me—we enjoyed art, philosophy, and just being silly together. Even now, I’ll look for people with similar interests, but it just doesn’t click. I wish I had something more concrete to go off of—I like a lot of people, but I wouldn’t call them “my people”. I found one girl I really click with, but she’s super flaky and doesn’t seem reliable. I want to love deeply and be loved back deeply, to choose and be chosen.

I’d love to hear your two cents on this. How have female friendships blossomed for you? Am I being too picky or judgemental? Am I doomed to be a floater, a social nomad never belonging to anyone?

Anyways. Thanks! Love you. Boutta reread masters of death, it’s that time of year.

man, I won't lie, finding and maintaining meaningful friendship has been harder in my personal experience than romantic love. there honestly shouldn't even be a distinction! it's a difference of texture, not process. finding someone you vibe with and can be vulnerable with and can trust with your intimacy and tenderness and care and also rely on even though there is no social protocol for friendship the way there is for romantic partnership is a real mind-bender. I think it just depends on how you choose to prioritize your relationships, energy, and time. finding friends is hard, especially if you're coming from a group that already had its own dynamic and fabric, but it just comes down to being open to connection and valuing people for what they bring to your life, even if it's just the possibility of something bigger. be open, be honest about yourself and your passions, and that will take you pretty far, but also, genuine connection is rare. which means it might be hard to find (that's the bad news) and you should nurture it when you have it (that's the actionable item). I meet smart, funny, kind, thoughtful, interesting women all the time, but my openness to them is often what determines the difference between friendship and acquaintanceship.

"I want to love deeply and be loved back deeply, to choose and be chosen" is a great way to put it, and something to hold onto, because knowing what you want is a great first step to being able to make the choices to honor it