#Idk who would think this kind of message would hit anyone over the age of 12 my god. this was such a laugh to get thank you anon

[tezzbot]

hi i've got a question

how do you manage to get your art looking so bad? my sister who's 8 seems to do a better job drawing with more detail and she does it with actual pencils and not digitally which gives you a major advantage yet you still somehow managed to look worse than hers?

Bro good for her!! That's really impressive at her age, tell her to keep at it I'm sure she'll make it big as an artist one day :D I'm only really drawing for myself so it's fine if it's that bad, I'm just having fun, I hope your 8 year old prodigy sister is having fun with her art too ^_^

[compassionatereminders]

i don't know what i should do but i distanced myself from some people (mentally too) bc I've been overwhelmed with trauma and getting tired of even speaking of it.. so I just say things are fine. I used to speak to one person whom we always shared thoughts with, understood me and what not, that was until their mental health got bad so I didn't really want to speak on my stuff to overwhelm ofc and offered support. we don't speak daily but we reply to each others messages whenever we can which became the norm.

the person did come across someone and got along with. they started dating within a few weeks and moved together. its been over a year they are and seems very happy. now, i already have some issues with people leaving or some kind of change occurring, which i noticed slowly, on top of that I can admit I feel toxic, in the sense of jealously. for context, ive never been in a relationship or anything. do I want to? Ofcourse. I think I deserve to be feeling loved. It never really bothered me until last year, its like my life was crumbling down and everyone was getting what they wanted, happiness, wishing I could as well.

ive never dealt with this emotion of jealously before, i just for some reason never cared and got on, but for some reason it hitting me more, maybe bc I'm slowly giving up on many things, even finding love.

this person has been someone who i would share my mind with (it was reciprocal) but ofc bc of things i couldn't anymore. I guess I couldn't share it with anyone so it felt bottled up, however I did share before of a friend who got in a relationship and doesn't even put effort in friendships.

anyways, once they got into one we still spoke. but I noticed a difference, they wasn't sharing much of themselves nor partner in the sense of i dont know much of a person he is, just a general overlook. idk I felt we used to speak on these things a lot when they was single so I felt weird how I dont know much of him as I thought. their replies began to get shorter, the time frame of replying back was a month later. we used to do that when times were hard for us, understanding and generally had long messages to send. but as I said, things were far short. So idk a month to send something little was a bit weird.

i also have this fear of friends sharing your personal information with their partners which make me super uncomfortable. I've had it happen before and its just a no. idk, I guess that stops me from sharing anything now bc maybe theyd do the same.

i guess I did notice a shift and whenever I do, I always distance myself. It is what it is. I feel incredibly alone and I feel like a negative person to be around with bc of these feelings I have inside. And I can see theyre happy and I dont want to make then feel uncomfortable with how I am feeling.

I sent a message at one point, addressing my mental health only. I wasn't fit to even speak, it was be unfair if I didn't respond at all so I said how things are quite rough so I won't speak for a while, it wasn't a goodbye but just I dont have the energy for things anymore. They respected how I felt and hoped things went well for me.

Its been 6 months and I haven't spoken to them. They posted on social media which I wished them happy birthdays and so, as they did for me. They say they pray for me things go good and I become happy. Which I appreciate. Normally I always wish them new years First, like every year but last year I did not. Partly bc I felt super depressed and also bc I dislike how I am always the one who says things first. After ages, they did wish me a happy new years message which was nice for once not being first too. However this year nothing so far, and I'm contemplating whether I should shoot a message right now.

It did make me feel a way when they kept mentioning, "so anything happening in ur love life?" Its like no, there never has. I guess I felt like things were being shoved in me so whenever I responded I would just be trutjful and say I dont see it happening and I'm okay with that. Which would say wait for ur time itll come. I understand when people say that but as a person who's been alone all my life that message doesn't help at all. It feels tiring to hear this constantly, I've waited for 25 years, I've waited enough, so please. I guess these little things made me feel bitter about them too, once I felt like it was shoved lowkey in my face I can't remember what exactly but like oh haha I dont have to worry about that now I have someone or something, which irked me. So yeah.

I have always appreciated having them in my life, our only form of contact is texting since we met online. We have been together some rough shit and have were there for each another too, also happy times too. But idk I guess I noticed a difference and it just made me step back.

I do feel sad bc I liked speaking with them, but I guess every since someone they came across they've just become private. And i guess I don't have much to speak about then. I'd rather not trauma dump bc I'm sick of my own shit too, but I just don't know what to do . I even thought maybe we should keep in contact here and there (not regularly as we used to) but I don't know what to do. I feel conflicted.

Okay I'm just gonna be completely honest with you, with the risk that it'll be a bit tough to hear. Because what I read is that YOU chose to distance yourself, YOU stopped sharing your life with this person, and then YOU said YOU didn't want to talk to them and didn't get back in touch. And now you're using the fact that the relationship didn't work out as proof that no one will ever actually care about you. And that's bullshit. And I get that there's trauma, and jealousy and insecurities and that you are not in this pattern on purpose, but what seems to be happening here is that YOU took a step back for whatever reasons, and then you used the fact that the relationship changed accordingly to you keeping your distance and asking for a break as proof that no one actually cares and no one ever will. And I have been there, and I have been in similar patterns. But it's bullshit. And it's toxic. Because this is not a story of a friend betraying you. This is a story of you sabotaging a friendship and then using the fact that it didn't last as proof of your insecurities. And that's something YOU need to work on if you want to feel better.

[soulsow]

textual frustration

words: 1581 rating: e (18+ readers only)

this one is inspired by the "would your wol take nudes" wolqotd. sorry about it. a few things to note: sam is left handed and this is set in me and egg's university AU!

It hadn’t started out as a particularly remarkable evening by any means, but Sam had been learning a lot—and not from the textbooks that sat forgotten on his desk across the room, shrouded by the darkness that extended past the piercing glow of his cell phone screen.

First off, he learned that sexting felt super weird (and a little embarrassing to start) but also felt super good, if the stiffness between his legs was anything to go off of. Euphie seemed to be into it too, unless she was lying about what his words were doing to her—but what reason would she have to lie?

Normally instead of texting all the things they wanted to do to each other they’d just actually do those things, but Sam had been insistent they spend a few evenings apart as finals week was rapidly approaching. Clearly his plan to study quickly went out the window as he was in bed with one hand on his phone and the other on his cock, too wrapped up in his budding sexual frustration to focus on study guides and notes.

Secondly, Sam learned that sometimes girls do want dick pics.

He’d never sent one before. Sure, he could be oblivious sometimes, but he wasn’t that stupid. Anyone who existed in this day and age knew that unprovoked photos of penises were almost always looked down upon. Besides, until just an hour ago he’d never sexted! He’d never had a valid reason to even think about taking a picture of his dick until now, as he looked back and read and reread the last couple texts he and Euphie had exchanged.

Euphie 💖: are you as turned on as i am right now?

im texting with my right hand…does that answer ur question lol?

Euphie 💖: show me~

He wasn’t about to leave her wanting, though. Kicking the blanket down a bit and pulling his erection fully out of his boxers, Sam aimed the phone in the general direction of his groin and tapped the camera button. The flash went off and the camera app clicked and Sam was presented with…probably the worst picture anyone could have taken of a dick in their life.

Sam didn’t really think that penises looked great to begin with, but this photo (blurry and washed out due to the flash, no less) was doing his member zero favors. Making a slight face at how ugly that first attempt was, he deleted it and pondered for just a moment before pulling up the web browser app on his phone next.

“How to take a good dick pic” wasn’t something Sam thought he’d ever have to Google, but here he was doing just that. Too much reading would make the boner go away, though, so he skimmed a few articles (and went through his texts with Euphie again to harden back up) before trying again.

Reaching over, he turned on the lamp on his bedside table, squinting as his eyes adjusted to the warm light that filled his corner of the room. The blanket was fully pushed to the end of his bed and his boxers followed suit, his t-shirt pulled up to expose his stomach and the happy little trail of hair that climbed from the base of his cock to his belly button.

Speaking of bases of cocks, that’s where one of his hands settled, holding his member up at what he hoped was a more appealing angle than almost laying flat against his body. With all the pieces in place all that was left to do was take the picture—making sure the flash was off this time.

The final product was better than the first, though it was still a little blurry, but maybe it just looked…artistic? Sam wasn’t good at these kinds of things and Euphie knew that, so he assumed she knew what she was getting into when she asked for a nude picture from him.

Attaching the photo to his next message he typed a quick message and hit send.

sorry that took a sec, idk how to take dick pics lol

The typing bubble showed up and for a split second, Sam was awash with an unfamiliar anxiety. They’d seen each other naked plenty of times and Euphie always told him how attracted she was to him, but maybe the picture wasn’t what she was expecting. Maybe she didn’t actually want a nude? His mind raced for a moment until her message finally popped up on screen.

Euphie 💖: oh my god sammie that’s so hot

The anxiety washed away and he was left with an incredibly strange sense of pride, though his face felt a bit flushed. It was a little embarrassing to keep seeing the picture of his own penis on the screen followed by her praise, though he didn’t have a chance to reply before the screen was filled with a photo from Euphie this time.

They had seen each other naked before, many times—but that didn’t stop a pang of need from coursing through him when he saw Euphie’s nude form on his phone screen, the hand that wasn’t holding her phone buried between her legs. His hips thrust forward almost involuntarily before he began to pump his left hand up and down his length again while his right fumbled as he attempted to text back.

fuck

so r u

Not poetry in the slightest, but Sam tended to get a bit of a one-track mind the closer he got to climaxing. Pulling his hand back for just a moment he spit in it (not a moment he’d be proud of in his future post-nut clarity) and continued to jerk off, trying to pretend the wetness from his own saliva could even compare to what it’d feel like to be inside of his girlfriend right now.

Euphie 💖: i wish you were here sammie

my fingers and toys dont feel as good as you

His eyes kept retracing her words as he continued to pleasure himself, thinking about how Euphie was doing the same, yearning for him as much as he wanted her in this moment. Scrolling back up a few messages his eyes locked onto the picture she’d sent, feeling that familiar tension building in his core.

euph im guna cum

(He didn’t care much about typos right now.)

It took only a split second before another series of text messages from Euphie showed up on screen.

Euphie 💖: show me

please

Slowing his hand for just a second he managed to pull open the camera app once more and flick the output to ‘video’ instead of ‘photo,’ hitting record just moments before he finished. Angles and lighting and whatever else be damned, he didn’t have time to try and make this aesthetic.

With one hand on his dick and the other on his phone Sam couldn’t suppress the sound that escaped him when he came, something between a whine and a growl that rumbled in his throat and devolved into heavy panting. As the orgasm faded and the last spurt of cum landed on his stomach, he stopped recording and sent her the video before he could get shy and second guess himself.

It took a bit for Euphie to respond, and it wasn’t with text but a video of her own. It was too dark to see much of anything but there were two things he could certainly hear—Euphie breathing his name over and over and the undeniable wet sounds of a very aroused woman touching herself.

If that wasn’t enough to get him horny again, the sounds she made as she approached and hit her own orgasm certainly were. Sam couldn’t help but play the video a few more times, relishing the sound of his name on her lips as she came. The video was interrupted by a new incoming text, however.

Euphie 💖: i just want you to know i came again but it happened so fast i couldnt record it for you

if it was anything like the one you sent me then i bet ur feeling really good

Euphie 💖: im still shaky and quivery sooo yeah. feeling amazing right now 💗

god dammit euphie, that was so hot im gonna get hard again and u kno i can only cum once lol

Sam was trying to will his rebound erection away to little success. Falling asleep after all this was going to be next to impossible, he just knew it.

Euphie 💖: heehee 😁 sorry sammieee~ guess you’ll just have to take care of it in the morning

might have to skip morning class and have you help me with that

Euphie 💖: what about getting ready for finals, huh??

yeah, because i did SO much of that tonight lol

Reaching over, Sam grabbed a handful of tissues to clean himself off before turning the lamp off and pulling the sheets up over himself once more (the tissues would be properly disposed of after getting up in the morning…probably). The banner across the top of his phone screen read 2 a.m.—definitely later than he wanted to stay up, but the warmth of love and satisfaction that filled the spots in his chest vacated by desire and lust just moments prior made it all worth it.

(And the thought of seeing Euphie in the morning to finish off what they’d started over text. That made it worth it too.)

[i-am-the-ass-admiral]

For A Laugh (Benny Miller x gn!reader)

Summary: It’s Benny’s first time at a gay bar and you ask him out the worst way possible; ~1.4k

Tags: humor, colloquial writing style, lust, teasing, flirting, implied bi!benny and reader, bad jokes (like terrible impeccable taste), alcohol consumption, excessive use of the word ‘baby’, soft benny, first date (sort of), au, meet-cute

Rating: Teen

Note: look i’ve never done this before, i just really really got stuck on this idea and i really liked benny. might not be your idea of him but god i think he’s a huge dork and a giant softie so here we are. wanted to throw a queer reader out there since you just don’t see them all that much and do something maybe a little off the wall? idk have fun, i think i’m hilarious XD

--

By some stroke of fate, you pick Benny up at a bar the first time you meet. 

He’s not hard to spot in a crowd as tall as he is and you’re just buzzed enough that your eye keeps coming back to him as the night goes on. He slides from corner to corner with his shoulders slightly hunched and the proverbial tail between his legs, following two shorter men who obviously know what kind of bar they’ve walked in to. Benny though—you didn’t know his name at the time so you called him Baby in your head—darts around with a kind of deer-in-headlights expression. It’s cute.

And annoying.

At first, you roll your eyes at him. Great, another straight dude to hit on your friends and get mad when they say no. 

Then you watch him a little longer.

You can’t help it, he’s pretty and looks more than a little lost and even from the end of the bar you can see how wide his tentative smile gets as he looks around. He likes what he sees; you’re just trying to figure out exactly what it is he’s liking. For a while Baby sits at a table with his friends. Holds a fruity cocktail between his knees almost as if he’s scared to be seen with it. Then after a couple drinks his smile gets wider and his voice gets loud. Boy’s boisterous—you can tell by the way he talks with his hands and throws his head back to laugh. He’s actually really fun to watch and it makes you smile. His buddies look almost out of place too until they get up to dance and—wow, talk about snake hips and floor sex, you haven’t seen anyone dance that good off the drag stage in ages. Baby stares at his empty drink for a bit, lost again, then heads to the bar. Not far from where you are, actually. Watching him walk with a couple drinks in him is a world of difference to how he first came in. There’s a swing in his broad shoulders, a confident cocky tilt to his head and you’re not sure if you want to punch him or if it’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen.

Despite your better judgment, you’re leaning to the latter. 

You make a bet with yourself as he pulls up at the bar—he got the fun drink to please his friends, he’ll order something boring now—and you’re pleasantly surprised to lose your own bet. Baby orders a whole-ass mai tai and looks overjoyed at the gigantic slice of pineapple and cherries garnishing the top. He turns to the stage. Avidly watches a few performers and even starts cheering. That’s when others folks start to take notice. A couple men make a pass and, wouldn’t you know it, Baby plays nice. Smiles and nods politely even though you can tell he’s not really into it. Not totally but it makes you think…

Maybe Baby’s a little bendy and not as straight as you thought.

At that point in the night, your friends are on their fifth dance, you’re on your third drink, and it’s getting way too loud in here for you. You were going to step out for a bit anyway—or so you tell yourself—so why not have some company? Who knows, you might get lucky. And if not, you’ll have an even better excuse to get some air and at least you can say you did it for laughs. Not that this is a casino but you’re feeling feisty. Might as well roll the dice. Baby looks like the kinda Midwest-flavored bite of beefcake that will either have great taste and love your stupid pickups or get scared and leave. Hopefully he’s not the kind to throw a punch.

You sidle up to the bar next to him. No doubt your outfit gets his attention first. It’s not risqué exactly but it’s got flavor, specifically your queer kind of flavor, and it draws the eye the way you wear it. You smile as you look him up and down, enjoying the red flush on his cheeks that trickles down under the collar of his fitted shirt. Wow, Baby is built. You ask the bartender for a couple drinks while part of your buzzing brain throws up red flags. Maybe you should try to land your mouth before it totally takes off but unfortunately for ground control your tongue is flying solo tonight. You get your drink. Pluck off the fruit, take a bite and shout over the music, 

“Can I get your name or should I just get you a drink?”

As expected, Baby looks confused as hell but he pastes on a polite, if guarded, smile. “I wouldn’t mind a drink.”

Without missing a beat, you give him the second glass in your hand. There’s something about the way that guarded smile doesn’t quite meet his eyes that makes you want to do something stupid. You want to see him smile and laugh and even though you don’t have the slightest inkling about him, you want to know why such a handsome face would ever look so afraid.

So of course you ask, “How ‘bout a bet then? I make you laugh, you tell me your name?”

He makes a considering face and takes a long sip. “Bet.”

“What do you call the sexuality where you’re attracted to people by no one is attracted to you?”

“What?”

Very off key and with all the drama you can muster, you sing, “Allll Biiiii Myseeeelf.”

Baby snorts a laugh in his drink, which you didn’t expect, and a little warmth grows in your stomach. His faux smile is turning to a real grin. Albeit still a confused one but delighted all the same and he shoots back, “So that’s you, huh? By yourself?”

You wince theatrically and shake your head. 

“Ouch, Baby’s got teeth! You got me.” 

“Nah, what you get’s a name.” He holds out his hand and you groan internally at the length and breadth of it as you shake. “Benny.”

Just like that Baby becomes Benny and you’re absolutely smitten. You give him your name. Maybe your fingers linger. You want to get him another drink. You want to tell him another joke. Hell, you want to take him home and stuff him full of food in the morning. He giggles a bit and it’s endearing enough you decide to press your luck. 

“How ‘bout this one? What’s the best N’Sync song?”

It’s not a fair question, dude might not have ever even heard a boy band in his life, so it takes you by surprise when he immediately pops back with a drawling version of, “It’s tearin’ up my heart when I’m with you?”

“Ooo, a little romantic! I see you!” you tease, pinching his thick bicep for just an instant. Because really, any longer than that and you’d melt. 

Benny doesn’t pull away like you were waiting for him to do. Instead he ducks his head, more than booze burning his cheeks, and—ah, hell. 

“That one is killer,” you admit, “but I was thinking of the one where they sing ‘Bye Bye Bye’ while we blow outta here for dinner?”

It’s a stupid line—one of the worst you’ve ever come up with—and it comes out more like a question than a joke. You throw back the rest of your drink to hide the look on Benny’s face but to your delight, he says,

“Wait, really?”

“Well yeah.” You lean against the bar next to him, trying and failing to be nonchalant and you shrug. “I’m hungry and even though you’re a Grade A snack I don’t think you’d appreciate me taking a bite. So how ‘bout dinner?”

Benny finishes his drink all at once. Wipes his mouth with the back of his hand as he stands. You sigh to yourself—this is the part where he walks off and you go get dinner alone, you suppose. But then he grins, like really grins, and offers you his arm to hold and suddenly your knees are jello shots. 

“I could go for a bite.” 

So you go for dinner. Text your friends, of course. But mosey down the street for 12AM tacos and end up laughing with Benny, shoulder to shoulder on the curb until your friends call for a ride.

And even though you didn’t get to take him home and feed him in the morning, your phone still dings through your snooze with a message under Benny’s name that reads: 

What did the barista say to his crush?

I like you a latte. :) 

Coffee later?

The warmth in your stomach from the night before blooms again and you laugh into your pillow before you text back:

Love to!

[mooshua]

hi uh it’s mooshua (aurora, moosh, whatever you want to call me). I’m so sorry about my sudden leave and everything and worrying some of you. that was really uncool of me to do and I really am so regretful for that. honestly I’m kinda embarrassed right now. explaining myself is rather difficult because, I won’t lie, I’ve been having feelings of inadequacy towards both myself and the works I put out. lol so I’m kind of having a hard time articulating my emotions because my mind is all over the place and I’m literally sweating as I type this out.

long story short: I got burnt out, started hating my writing with all my being, accumulated some Not So Nice messages, and then just did not want to be perceived anymore.

the long story: like I said above, I’ve been having Conflicting Feelings with regards to what I have been writing. anytime I read what I wrote I would just feel my gut twist and turn like I was going to throw up because I WAS SO EMBARRASSED. nothing about it was... up to my standard? nothing flowed right, I could point out a billion mistakes, and I wasn’t laughing like I used to. and it wasn’t just feeling embarrassed, it was like whenever I wrote something I would Not Be Having Fun With It because I kept thinking “deadline deadline deadline you need to finish this by the end of this week it’s only 5k words are you saying you can’t come up with a measly chapter in a week you used to be able to write 15 chapters in a month you dog” and I would just force myself to sit in front of my computer for hours and when I finally finished I wasn’t really happy with the final product I would just think “god I need a smoke break” even though I’ve never smoked in my life. and then I’d also get “please update!” messages/comments in the dry periods and, don’t get me wrong I really appreciate that people are reading my stuff, but I’d feel more and more stressed because then I’d automatically think “Oh My God People Are Waiting And I’m Letting Them Down.”

so with all these bad feelings welling up inside me I thought “I need a break.” and that’s what I did. I took like a 3 week break in september/october (I honestly don’t remember because the days have been bleeding together) in hopes that I just needed to rest to get my brain started again! after those 3 weeks I then did the usual routine of writing and updating, but again Things Just Didn’t Feel Right because it felt like I was diving back into that stress inducing spiral of the dreaded Weekly Updates.

I mean, I would get so hung over this stuff because in the back of my mind during my free time I’d be thinking “I could be writing and finishing up both series right now” and you know what? I’d do that. well, I tried at least. I’d force myself to sit and type whenever I had ANY free time because I already had everything planned, I just needed to put words to a page. well, doing that for nights on end was just mentally exhausting me to New Levels. everything I was doing was not sustainable at all.

AND THEN THINGS SLOWLY GOT WORSE because I would have zero confidence in my writing and every week or so I’d get a message in my inbox saying something along the lines of (or rather word for word) “your writing isn’t that good/special/anything new I don’t understand why people are reading it/why you get so many notes/you’re not as funny as you think you are” and at first I would kind of laugh at it and go “oh trust me buddy, I’m wondering the same thing too” and then delete it because I do Not Wish to entertain the thought on my blog, but then I was hitting a new all time low in my mentality and I got another message on the day I deactivated which was a Really Bad Day and it read “your writing isn’t good” and I went back to the chapter I was editing for the day, felt my gut do that twist and I thought “you know what? you’re right. it’s not. goodbye.” pressed the forbidden red button and honestly felt a weight lift off my shoulders because that meant I no longer had to deal with that stupid cycle of constantly updating in order to Feel Something.

I kept thinking “why is this not as fun as it used to be, why am I so stressed out all the time opening that stupid doc and going on my blog?” like I would literally sit down and think about this as if it was a math problem or something. my inadequacies kept rising within me but I would just bottle it up, go to writing and trying to answer messages like nothing was wrong because I really didn’t want to worry anyone or think I was a charity case who needed help, but now that I think about it I really should have talked this out instead keeping my mouth shut. I just thought this was something everyone goes through so I was like whatever it’ll pass. I kept thinking “this shouldn’t be as deep as I’m making it” and brush it aside, but then I kept thinking negatively about my ability to write and literally DREADED sitting down in front of my laptop that I would have to hype myself up in order to get a sentence in. I think the last time I actually felt really proud of something I had written was during the summer...... and then after that it was just downhill.

and listen. I know this is just a Fun endeavor and I really shouldn’t care about what other people think as long as it makes me happy, but along the way I stopped being happy because I started caring Way Too much and putting unrealistic expectations on myself. it’s weird. I know at my Big Age I should have a better mentality, but it’s been eating at me for a while and I just wanted to pull the plug.

okay now the part that a lot of people are wondering: are you going to finish your series? I plan to. I really want to. I think it’d be a waste not to. I’m still feeling pretty conflicted right now with my writing, but I already mapped everything out, and I don’t like to break promises since I already said I was going to do this thing. thanks to anyone who read my works and I’m sorry to have worried you. I just needed to take a step back and think about what’s good for myself.

yeah. so that’s my explanation. this whole thing is so long and for that I’m sorry. if you went through this then pat on the back for you. I don’t know when I’ll come back or how long it will take. I just want time for myself and to not think about anything with regards to writing. like at all. also I only have 1 request: for anyone who downloaded the series from ao3, please do not repost or reupload or redistribute them. please I’m literally begging. I deleted them for a reason and I really don’t like the idea of these stories floating around without my consent. when I do get back into it I’d like to make edits to what I have written. idk if any of my mutuals still want to talk to me after this but feel free to lmk lmfao sorry I know that I sound like I’m off the deep end but I really just need to cool it before I start diving back into a Healthy Relationship With My Writing Hobby lol. why am I so dramatic... SORRY. anyway. I hope you guys are staying happy and healthy during this time. don’t forget that.

[ickle-ronniekins]

meet you there

PLEASE DO NOT REPOST MY WORK WITHOUT MY CONSENT. likes/reblogs/comments are perfectly fine!

prompt: this actually wasn’t a request but it was a fic title prompt from my 4k sleepover that @accioxreparo sent my way -- the title she came up with was ‘meet you there’ and i’ve picked freddie. you can view the original idea here, if you please. general reminder that my requests are currently CLOSED

pairing: fred x ravenclaw!reader

word count: 2.6k

warning(s): character death

A/N: i’m real sorry

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Ages 8 and 7

“Freddie! Did you see? Did you see what I did?”

Eight year old Fred squealed with delight as you did a tiny little backflip on your broom in the air outside the Burrow. The pinks and purples of the sky were melting together, and he knew that night was growing nearer. “I did, Y/N! Can’t wait ‘til we both get to Hogwarts and can play Quidditch together. You’re going to make a fantastic Seeker. That was bloody brilliant!”

“Frederick Weasley!”

Molly’s voice was shrill, but she peered out through the window of her kitchen and shook her head, as if she were trying to guess how many times she’d scolded Fred already today. She sighed, choosing to fight a different battle than that of his language. “It’s supper time, Freddie.”

The both of you flew gently to the ground and landed. You tossed Fred the extra broomstick and wiped the sweat from your forehead. “See you tomorrow then?”

“Nah, later,” Fred replied. He nodded toward the other end of the large field in front of his house. “After dinner, let’s go up the hill and look at the stars for a bit. My dad says there are supposed to be wicked constellations tonight!”

You giggled before pulling your hair back off of your shoulders and turning to head back toward your own house just around the bend. “Don’t let you mum see you!”

“Don’t worry,” Fred told you with a mischievous glint in his eyes, “I won’t. Meet you there!”

Ages 11 and 10

It wasn’t fair. It just wasn’t fair. How come Fred would get to start at Hogwarts without you? Your mum told you it was because he was already eleven. You still had a few months until your birthday. But it still wasn’t fair!

You slumped on the couch next to the empty fireplace as Fred attempted to bring his huge trunk down the steps. They both hit the floor with a loud thump!

“Bloody help me, won’t you?”

“Not when you talk to me like that,” you frowned. It didn’t take long before the two of you were erupting into giggles, though.

Fred placed himself beside you and gently elbowed you in the ribs. “Hey, don’t be so sad. You’ll be at Hogwarts in just a year’s time. And besides, aren’t you excited that I’ll know my way around the castle, and I’ll be able to tell you all the places to avoid and the best times to sneak out of the common rooms?”

You huffed and kicked his foot before beginning to tug at the hem of your shirt. “You wouldn’t! You’ll get me into all sorts of shenanigans, and.. and.. probably detention.. and probably turn my hair bright green or something!”

“Only if you’re placed into Slytherin,” Fred grinned. The sunlight flooding the windows highlighted the dimple on the right side of his face. “So it’d better be Gryffindor.”

You rolled your eyes. “And how are you so sure you’re going to be placed in Gryffindor, mister?”

Fred pointed at himself, as if to say, isn’t it obvious? “The whole lot of my family has been in Gryffindor for years! George and I aren’t going to break that streak. What kind of Weasley d’you think I am?”

“The annoying kind?”

“That’s plain rude,” Fred replied before thwacking you with a throw pillow. The two of you began hitting one another incessantly before Mr. Weasley’s calls came from outside. It was time to go. You were embarrassed at how quickly the tears welled up in your eyes, and you turned toward the fireplace so Fred wouldn’t see.

“Hey, it’ll be alright,” his voice was softer than before. “When you get to Hogwarts next year, I’ll show you all the secret passageways and let you know what the best sweets are, and I promise to not turn your hair bright green. Even if you are placed in Slytherin.”

A gentle smile tugged at your mouth, but it didn’t stop the tears from coming still. Fred continued when you didn’t, “I’ll miss you, you know.”

You sniffled and bit down on your wobbling lip. “I’ll miss you, too. Have fun playing Quidditch.”

Fred’s eyes went bright as the two of you wandered outside to meet the rest of the Weasleys. “That reminds me! Be sure to keep practicing here, yeah? With Ron and Ginny. I reckon mum’ll let them play a little bit with you. Promise?”

“Promise.”

Fred tugged his trunk and placed it into the back of Mr. Weasley’s Ford Anglia before pulling you into a bone crushing hug. Mr. Weasley was calling his name again. Fred gently elbowed you in the ribs once more before bopping your nose with his finger. His grin was brighter than the sun. “Meet you there!”

Ages 15 and 14

You stared in the mirror at your very obnoxious coloured blue hair. It resembled that of your Ravenclaw tie. You so wanted to be angry at him. You wanted to be angry, but you had to admit -- he was kind of brilliant.

As promised, he hadn’t turned your hair bright green when you’d arrived at Hogwarts a year after him, especially after you’d been placed in Ravenclaw, and not in Slytherin. He forgave you for not being placed in Gryffindor, though. He’d said he was excited to pummel Ravenclaw to the ground in Quidditch, anyway.

You knew the counter spell, but you kind of wanted to show off this new look of yours. Plus, wouldn’t he be absolutely floored if you waltzed into the Great Hall, not batting an eyelash at anyone who was brave enough to give you a look?

You plopped yourself down at the Gryffindor table during breakfast after making a few heads turn -- including three sixty head turns from the house ghosts. George spat out his tea and was not-so-subtle when it came to trying to hide his laughter. Fred raked his bottom lip through his teeth and smiled brightly.

“Ah, good morning,” he said before turning back to his porridge, “and how are we?”

“We are brilliant,” you picked a piece of his toast off of his plate and bit into it. When he threaded his eyebrows together and tried to get it back from you, you just stretched your arm back. “Oh, I’m sorry, is this yours? I figured, you know, since my hair now matches the colour of my robes, I was allowed to take your breakfast since you’ve been a foul little git.”

At first, his eyes widened in horror. But when he saw the faint smile on your lips as you continued to scarf down his breakfast, his shoulders relaxed. He raised his eyebrows, “Was worried you might be mad at me for a second there.”

“Mad? Never.” you replied. “Now if it had been green, well, that’d be a different story. But I’ve got to say, Weasley, I reckon blue suits me just fine.” You flipped your hair over your shoulder and started to laugh.

Fred yanked the half eaten slice of toast out of your hands and shoved the rest of it into his mouth. Your jaw dropped dramatically as he licked his lips and took a long slug of his tea. “Couldn’t agree more, Y/N,” he began and you rolled your eyes. Always the jokester, he was. But when he looked at you with a new type of admiration and serenity in his eyes, you froze. “You could have blue hair and purple eyebrows and I’d still think you were the most beautiful girl on this earth.”

It was just a small moment, one shared between the two of you, when he grinned so earnestly you swore he might spill out all his heart’s desires to you. But as quickly as it appeared, it had vanished, and he went back to wiggling his eyebrows at you teasingly and eating his porridge. “Hey, wanna run some Quidditch drills after this?”

“Sure,” you replied a little too quickly, trying to catch your breath. You stood up from the table to get some breakfast of your own. “Meet you there. Oh, but first, Freddie?”

“Yeah?”

You smirked. “Before anything else happens today, it’s my turn to dye your hair.”

He thought on this for a moment before reaching out for a high five. He loved how you’d come to negotiate with him over the years. He guessed it was from being on the receiving end of tons of his pranks. He swallowed down his nerves and replied, “Deal.”

Ages 17 and 16

“Fred! Bloody hell, what’s gotten into you?”

“Just have to get you alone, don’t I?” he smirked.

The two of you were stumbling giddily, alone in a back corner of the desolate girls’ dormitory in the Ravenclaw common room. Most everyone were either in lessons or out on the grounds on this gorgeous day, but the two of you chose to be locked inside, for you didn’t exactly know how much time you’d be able to spend alone before he left. Especially with Toad Face breathing down your necks every chance she got.

His lips were locked with yours for what seemed like hours. It was slow and easy and comforting before he reluctantly pulled away and started tracing circles onto your hands, trying as he might to lot let you see the glassiness in his eyes.

“Promise me something,”

“What?”

He sighed. “Next year, bring home the cup. You were robbed this year, love. Bloody Umbridge banning us from matches, and now the entire schedule is all wonky. Bring it home. But I swear if you tell any Gryffindors I said that, I’ll deny it.”

You raked your bottom lip through your teeth before poking him in the stomach. “You? A Gryffindor, hoping a Ravenclaw wins the cup? What would the other students think?”

“I reckon they’d think I’m out of my mind.”

You snorted. “Well, yeah, you are.”

The laughter faded away after a few moments, and Fred peered lovingly into your eyes. You could tell how much his nerves were eating at him -- leaving this all behind, not finishing school. The wrath of his mother. The unknown of how the shop will do. You traced the freckles on his cheeks and nose.

“You’ll be okay, you know. Actually, more than okay. It’ll be bloody brilliant, alright?”

Fred swallowed thickly before squeezing your hips. “You promise?”

“I promise. Do you promise to wait for me once you get there? I’ve got some exams to finish up.” You winked.

Fred laughed lightly and pulled you into his chest before placing light kisses onto your head. He took a long, deep breath and continued to caress your hair as you both tried not to think about the upcoming weeks. You squeezed your eyes shut and tried with all of your might to focus on the sound of his heartbeat, but each thump of his pulse was just another reminder that you were one second closer to him leaving.

“I promise,” he echoed you. “I’ll meet you there, won’t I?”

Ages 20 and 19

“Of course we’ll win! We’re bloody brilliant, aren’t we? Reckon Voldy won’t even be able to stand a chance, ruddy pumpkin head, he is.”

“Fred, please, just -- can’t you be serious for one moment?”

“Haven’t got a serious bone in my body, I’m afraid.”

“Freddie.”

His sigh had sounded different. It had a strange sense of urgency to it. He turned over in bed, took your head in his hands and pressed his lips together. He began to gently caress his thumb over your jawline. He’d never looked so serious in all his life. “I promise that everything will be alright. But you’ve got to try and get some sleep, darling.”

“But I can’t --”

“You’ve got to try. I’m right here.”

You swallowed down your tears and nuzzled your face into his chest. You breathed in the all too familiar smell of Molly’s washing detergent, and squeezed his fingers in yours. The two of you lay wide away in the darkness of the night, your breathing finally in sync with one another.

“When this is all over, we’ll be a proper family, alright? You and me. I promise.” He pressed a kiss to your forehead before laughing again. “You didn’t really expect one of us to leave without getting married first, did you?”

He groaned a bit when you teasingly punched him square in the stomach.

That was just last evening.

How had everything changed so drastically in less than twenty four hours? Why had those few precious hours in bed gone by so quickly?

Why hadn’t Fred been able to keep his promise?

You and George both had your arms wrapped tightly around one another, probably to help one another stay upright. You didn’t quite know how you were able to still walk, not when your body felt like all of the blood and oxygen had been drained from it. The two of you fell to the floor beside him; Fred’s body was still warm, his skin so soft, as though he were simply asleep.

You wanted to go back in time. Any amount of time, just to get more of it with him. Just to hear him say he loved you, to tell you he couldn’t wait until you both would get married, just to hear him say your name.

He’d managed to fight without gaining but a scratch. His hair was still perfectly messy, just like it always was, his hands folded neatly across his chest. It was miraculous, really, that there were so many others here, in this room, alive, who looked far worse than he did. And yet it was him who was dead.

It was him who’d had his life stolen out from underneath him, like a cruel joke.

You turned to George, blurry through your vision, and choked out the only few words you were brave enough to speak. “He didn’t keep his promise.”

George dropped his head and let his hoarse cries rattle through the Great Hall. He squeezed your hand and lay across his brother, begging him to wake up, just wake up. You tried to pull George back to his feet, but his body felt much heavier than it had just a few hours ago. Percy pulled him into a hug and let George cry, very similarly to the time when you were all very young and he’d fallen off of his broom and broken his ankle. And who had made him feel better? Fred, of course.

Fred looked so tranquil, it was almost terrifying to look at him. And yet, you couldn’t look away. You tried, through your blurry vision, to memorize everything about him -- the arch of his eyebrows, the way his eyelashes brushed gently against his cheeks, the spattering of freckles across his nose, the way his one ear was slightly crooked from the other. You wanted to remember the way his fingers felt interwoven with yours, like they’d been crafted that way because they were meant to be there, the way his lips always felt so soft. You ran a hand through his hair to try and push down that one stubborn part, but it sprang back up, just like always, and you managed a small chuckle. You couldn’t forget. You just couldn’t. You didn’t want to forget a single thing about him, and you were afraid that as soon as they took his body away, that you would.

You traced a gentle line over his freckles again. It must’ve been hours that you’d been lying there, because he felt cold now. Your body froze at the contact and you had to use every single ounce of strength you somehow had left to not crumble to pieces. But you managed to place one last, gentle kiss to his forehead as the sunlight of a new day flooded the Great Hall.

“I’ll meet you there one day, Freddie.”

[one-abuse-survivor]

before i start, thank you so much for doing what you do;this blog has given me good advice countless times and i really have to thank you for that.

my issues with my parents are that they don't take me seriously. i can literally go up to them and say: "mom/dad, i think i might be autistic or have ADHD (both would be quite likely) can i get that checked out" and list a bunch of examples why i think that and they'll just be "nah, that can't be, you don't seem like that at all" as of i didn't break my mind over it researching it and talking to people who have it to see if we've had similar experiences just to get some kind of reference as to why i feel the way i feel and why i struggle so much with things that so many other people find so easy.

but then, in the following weeks and months (after talking w them) they just randomly point out things about me that kinda annoy them, like me talking out of turn a LOT or me not looking at people or me having trouble focusing if there isn't also music and a movie going at the same time or mom saying that i seem hyperactive to her because i'm always moving my legs or pacing around or rubbing my hands or drumming on the table with pens. things like that (plus a lot more) were the exact things i was telling them about and they just put it off like it's nothing but as soon as it affects and annoys them it's suddenly very real. at this point i'm struggling to talk to my parents about anything even remotely more serious than generic smalltalk and i'm having a hard time believing myself that my struggles are in fact real and i'm not just making them up.

and also on a less related note; the thing i hate most about my parents: if i'm wearing headphones and couldn't understand what a parent was yelling from somewhere else in the house then it's my fault. but if it's the exact same situation but i'm the one calling and they couldn't hear me, then it's obviously my fault too (i kinda get the first one but srsly how could i not wear headphones when they're constantly arguing with my brother in the room next to mine) (either way if one of the scenarios is clearly my fault, then the other shld be clearly their fault bc that's how logic works)

hhhh, this got quite long. i would love to hear your thoughts about this

a continuation from the other ask about my parents not taking me seriously even when i ask them for help with my hardest problems. that ask didn't really go in the direction i had planned but there is so much going on between my parents and me that i really need to talk to someone about

background: i'm around 15-16 rn and have a brother who's 18. primary school was academically very easy for me (lots and lots of great and even perfect grades) but my brother didn't have it as easy (lots and lots of mediocre and meh grades) so my parents really just kinda let me do my thing while they were constantly busy with my brother. so i got really independant and did all of my stuff on my own bc a) i always had done it that way and b) my parents were already busy and stressed. but after my brother got his first computer and got into video games his grades dropped and my parents started constantly arguing with him and taking away his computer and stuff like that so there was always a lot of tension (and i got to a point where i can't handle people yelling; that's what i was referring to with the headphone thingy at the end of the last ask) i don't know if i can go that far and say that my parents kinda neglected me and my emotional needs in favour of saving my brother grades but that's pretty much the way it feels.

i'm now a sophomore (school works a bit different here but i'm the equivalent of a highschool sophomore afaik, here it's just 10th grade) and starting from about mid 8th grade (end of 2018) i've been struggling a lot with self care and upkeep of my already minimal social circle and academic stuff (i'm at the academically highest level of school you could be at my age without skipping any years) and also mental health.

i got quite depressive and started isolating myself and casting away friends and my grades went down a lot, which really disappointed me because my great grades were kind of my trademark thing. but i didn't feel safe talking to my parents because of the huge distance that we built by me "never" needing their help with stuff.

in that time (almost a year ago, our anniversary is in twenty days or so) i got a girlfriend and i'm hella glad that i can talk to her about everything but i feel like i can't just go dump trauma and parent issues on her forever

about last november or so i was at a pretty low point and was suicidal and that's kind of when i snapped and went to my parents to talk so being cast away and having my issues invalidated really really hurt then and made me spiral even deeper and my gf was the only thing keeping me afloat.

i'm kind of a bit better now but i have rebuilt my view of my parents from "idk we never really interact" to "trying to interact or talk is not worth the energy" and needless to say i don't like them that much

oh and i forgot about all the times i got panic attacks and sensory overloads @ school because there are so many people there (1700 students + 200 teachers) and it's loud everywhere and of course asking my parents for what to do if suddenly everything is too bright and too loud and you can't move or talk because of it didn't get me anywhere (and since i didn't know what it was called or how to describe it properly, i didn't really find any Information online either

and just typing this makes me think of so many more things that they did that aren't okay things to do (a lot of gender identity stuff for example because i'm also neck-deep in that) . but writing this has also helped a lot right now. thank you for being there and listening.

and just in case i'm ever gonna pop back in to say something i'm gonna drop a name for easier identifying

sincerely - 🌌 milky way anon

Hi, nonnie! Thanks for the kind words, I'm really glad my blog has been of help ❤️

I'm sorry your parents are making it hard to believe your struggles are real :( you deserve to be taken seriously and to get access to all the help you might need. Just the fact your symptoms are there and you're noticing them and they're interfering with your daily life is enough to get them checked, regardless of if you need a diagnosis/meds/anything else. No one deserves to live wondering if their struggles are worth discussing with a doctor or professional.

And you're right: if one of those things was your fault, then the other should be theirs, logically. But I don't even think it's "your fault" you didn't hear them because you were wearing headphones, to be honest. I think it's just something that happens from time to time and that doesn't warrant getting mad over; I think it's the kind of thing that simply needs to be talked about so everyone in the household knows how to communicate with everyone else without getting frustrated. It's as easy as saying "hey, whenever I put on headphones I'll just text the family group chat to let you guys know I won't hear you. If you need anything in those moments, just text me instead". I do this with my girlfriend sometimes—if we're wearing headphones and we're in the same room, we simply pat each other when we need something and wait until the other takes off their headphones to talk. It really doesn't have to be an issue where anyone is to blame. You're allowed to take steps to feel safe and comfortable in your house without getting punished for it.

But, of course, this doesn't work if the people around you choose to prioritise "being right" and proving you're wrong over a peaceful and healthy cohabitation, which is what most toxic and abusive people do.

As for your second ask, I would say if it feels like your parents neglected you and your needs because they were always focusing on your brother, then it's okay to say that they did. The fact alone that those feelings are there makes you deserving of talking about it and wanting to heal from it; the cause of those feelings doesn't have to be something major, or sound deeply traumatising when you say it out loud, in order to "count". And people whose emotional needs were consistently met don't feel like they weren't.

I've already shared this video before, but if you want some resources on identifying and healing from emotional neglect, I really recommend watching it. Please bear in mind, though, that the video says it's important to not blame parents for emotionally neglecting you, but I don't think that's the message a lot of people need to hear and I think you should allow yourself to feel angry at your parents for not meeting your needs and causing you trauma. That's pretty much the only thing I'd criticise about the video.

I'm sorry to hear you've been struggling with your grades and mental health lately, nonnie. I had a quite similar experience when I was in high school—I used to always get great grades, but my mental health and trauma put a lot of strain on them (as well as on my social life; I lost a lot of friends in those years) and it was really distressing to see the only thing that made me "worthy" crumble between my fingers like that. I'm still trying to unlearn this idea that your grades define your worth, and it's been really hard.

I'm so sorry your parents weren't there for you when you hit that low 😔 I'm glad your girlfriend could help you stay afloat in that moment, but they absolutely should've been there for you all those times you reached out to them for help with your struggles, and the fact that they didn't is emotionally neglectful of them.

I'm glad you're in a better place now ❤️ I really hope you can find out all the information you need on gender identity and sensory overload and any other issues that might be affecting you. Know that you deserve for your parents to be there for you. You shouldn't have to face any of this on your own, or even with only the support of other people your age. You deserve for them to care. You deserve to have your symptoms checked out. You deserve adult guidance to find resources to help you better understand and manage your struggles.

Sending all my virtual support your way ❤️ and happy belated anniversary to you and your girlfriend!

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Hey!! 👋🏽😄 I know you said in your last rant about SK8 and Reki and Renga that you were one of those people that always looks up and learns from others, but after your last Langa edit, I just wanted to remind you how immensely talented you are. I might have not seen your first attempts at editing, but I know how it looks like when you're barely starting something, and I'm sure everyone is proud of the progress you've made and many people looks up to you as the level of skill they want to achieve. You're doing amazing! 💖💖💖

Hi, my love!!!!!! ASDFSDFGHG that’s soooo sweet, thank you so much for saying this, it really means the world to me <3 Oh, haha I’ve deleted most of my old videos so it wouldn’t hurt anyone’s eyes lmao T_T I’m still a bit nervous each time I’m uploading my vids to the day to be honest, even with so many subs rn, but at first I really didn’t have any supporters at all and my god I sucked at this, but I guess the love for my fav ships was stronger apparently haha. So I always get silly happy at each nice comment and feedback, so thank you seriously. 

I really love love love vidding, Idk why but when smth comes out the way I wanted it’s a super addictive feeling for some reason, but many times I just looked at the final result and just threw it in the trash and started over and my god how many times SonyVegas crushed and didn’t autosave the project. I’m like Suga now, I’m pressing the save button each 2 minutes, cause don’t want to lose anything xD Being someone’s inspiration is truly an honor to me, I’ve got some messages that hit me too hard. Still feels weird bc I’m like “but do you know that I can’t even use photoshop tho, how do u like me now then?” lol.

I’m always drawn to talented characters, bc they amaze me, esp the humble ones. Like those who hate Haru or Lanaga just buffle me honestly. I understand that they’re pretty and talented and everything, but they’re also the sweetest and loveliest human beings, so like...??? And I adore those who don’t whine and get what they want. I just can’t help it. I’m a strong believer in the fact that "you can do anything if you put your mind to it”. So far it worked in real life so suck it lol.

People are also saying like Langa doesn’t deserve to win this and Haru doesn’t deserve to be in Olympics, like Langa didn’t snowboard since he was 2 and Haru wasn’t swimming every day since he was born. I’m like.. and you need to check in the mirror if your face is a shade of green. BTW I’ve also been in a professional sports for quite a long time since I was a little kid, ballroom dancing and adored it back then, and I did not get jealous at ppl who were talented than me, I was watching the tapes actually with a popcorn. And oh god those large competition events when you sit there for days and give it all, but then you’re like 296 out of 1000. Why was I proud instead of being sad? Idk xD It was fun.

So thanks for liking the vid, cause I even regretted uploading it a bit yesterday. Sadly everyone already knows that we lost this fandom to the middle schoolers being extra, so they do not care for anything each episode except for this ship, so that’s what I got for posting a just Langa vid:

And etc. and that just made me sad, cause I do not like such fandoms, like it’s not even related to the video, that I’ve been making... with love.  Also thanks for the "sama” title, I’m flattered, but editor only wants to vid matchablossom for now, so like there’s no need for any warnings. I’ve been in such horrendoes fandoms, that I’m immune to this. I also in fact didn’t know some keep ruining Langa’s page and saying that he steals Reki’s screen time... cause he’s aparently the only main character...? ...lmao? I didn’t even know Langa can be hated tbh. I wasn’t really ready for all the drama that followed me making a vid about him.

I’ve already deleted some comments, cause I’m like what this even has to do with the vid about Langa? No, I am not obliged to make a vid about Reki, too. What if I post a matchablossom vid, everyone will only start commenting “do renga”, cause fuck your efforts? I’m like... I hate such fanbases, seriously. I do not even know where this is going, but their fans are already pissing me off. I’m still trying hard for this to not affect my point of view about the ship, cause it’d be kinda unfair to them, but its getting harder each week istg.

And I maybe can’t take requests, but I love when some try to get me addicted on their ship with passion and great arguments. It happened to me with some nice ppl. But def not with agression and stupidity haha.

Cause apparently its one of the fandoms where you can’t NOT care for the main ship, even if you accept it for the only possible Langa ship (cause he doesn’t give a shit for anyone else, so like what’s the point), but it doesn’t do anything for you. I’m like... thanks for threatening. This will make me on board ASAP. Like it’s not the epitomy of love to me... I’m sorry? LMAO 

Some anon even sent me a “you’re dense” (literally thats it) ask after that Reki ask. I was tempted to write smth like “oh I’m sorry, this is the most epic love story of my life and his character is the most complex in the world and he’s the best friend and the most inspiring human being that ever hit my screen. can I become undense now? xD”. But you know I do not know if they’d realise the sarcasm and my pride sadly never allowed me to sell my life values for a bunch of 12 years olds to love me lol

My sister always laughs and jokingly says “but you’d probably get much more subs if you made a vid about this or that, but at what price that would be lmao”. Cause yeah, I never could make myself vid smth I do not like, cause I love vidding and do not want it to be associated with things I do not like, plus it’ll most likely turn out ugly, if I do not care. My mom says that she can feel love I put in my shipping vids that’s why she loves them. I really don’t think she’s wrong. But that also kinda makes me an idiot technically, cause I’m not into many of the popular ships, and some popular animes I just find really basic. 

Also I’m like 100% sure it ain’t happening, but even if they miraculously suck each other’s dicks while sitting on a skate board, I can still have the rights not to care at the end. Like did I sign some form where I’m obliged to love each and everyone canon gay ship even if it’s not what I like? Like gay is not the type of love in relationships. You can only care about his ass like Lan Zhan for example or you can only care about your ass. Like that’s different types of relationships, and whatever you like you like. So get all the way of people’s backs, please.

Also do ppl know that you do not need to be blind to the bad sides of the characters in your ships? Or you just gonna be like “I suddenly can’t see” for forever.

So really thanks for such wonderful message and liking the video and for the boosts when I need them and not being an ass to me if I’m not being obsessed with smth, when you like it. (like I think we have different ship in bnha, right? but we’re still doing great tho, thanks for being an angel <3)

I still didn’t expect this becoming a Voltron 2.0. situation tho. We in our twenties see everything differently, I guess. I do get extra about “their love is everywhere”, but I do not get extra by anonymously attacking ppl, threatening creators and yelling “queeerbating psychotic blind assholes if these two aint fucking by the end of the season I’m shaving my head and jumping out of the window and shoot the director. you do not ship it HARD? YOU DUMB FUCK. THAT’S THE BEST LOVE STORY IN THE WORLD”. Like damn, take your blinders off and see the world, kid. Firstly, it’s definitely not, secondly, ppl see love differently in general and at each age too.

Ah, also you must kill Adam, cause he’s a pedo apparently. Like he ain’t even a threat to your ship, unless you’re blind, but they’re still at it, like they do not know that this kind of age difference is literally nothing for an anime? And that there are canon ships with a huger age difference left and right, too. It’s like its their first time approaching an anime or smth. Like in anime world character can literally kill 1000 ppl with his bare hands and bathe in their blood and we can still stan them, depends on their story, ok? Also Langa couldn’t care less for his advances, so like separate Adam from your ship pls. Like, fuck off, if someone is interested in his character. Yeah, he’s a weirdo for reasons, but anime kind of weird do not apply to real life. Stop acting like you’re some purist, when later you’re gonna ship smth else and it suddenly will not apply. Also rules do not apply to animes, everyone knows they do not apply. These are not western cartoons, my god. And 24 years old flirting with 16 year old is defiinitely not the weirdest shit anyone has ever seen in the anime. Chinese BL has characters who were 14 and 30 when they met and happily married. Also FICTION is not life. Literally no one cares. If you’re scared for your saint eyes, do not watch animes, you’re gonna have a heart-attack from what you can see there. Also we’ve seen gayer bromances in animes, who are just bromances, so pls do not shoot anyone if it’s not canon.

So basically I was kinda pissed yersterday, cause fuck them for ruining the tag, but after chatting with my hommies and your ask, I’m okay again, I just have to avoid this fandom and stick to a tight community xD. I just got used to my nice fandoms and forgot for a bit about the precautions you need to take if you’re in one of those. You know. Who make a circus out of lgbt, instead of supporting it, and make other ppl hate being in fandoms.

P.S. sorry for this partially unrelated rant, your messages really always make my heart bloom, so thanks for supporting me, and I know you’re proud of my progress, too <3 and this makes me happy. LY

[fbfh]

Light Up the Dark - [IV] Leo x reader

genre: romance + action + enemies to lovers kinda

word count: 2k

au: none

pairing: Leo x gothy!child of eros!fem reader

requested: nah

warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR HEROES OF OLYMPUS!!, normal reader being mean lol, mentions of abandonment issues, a breakup over skype call basically, reader uses  seduction powers for fun and profit, i think that’s it

summary: You pull some strings to get a hotel room and some cash, the boys get to know you a little better, and you overhear something you probably shouldn’t have.

listen to: bad liar - imagine dragons

a/n: since the reader is a daughter of Eros, the characters are aged to 18+ idk i think i forgot to put that on the other chapters lol 

also requests r open uwu

“What do you mean she’s not coming?” Leo asks, all the bad feelings quickly overtaking him. 

“She said she wanted to sight see more, and that she’d meet us back at camp in a few days,” Jason says, trying to break the news as gently as possible, “I’m sorry, Leo.”

He bit back his heartache.

“Yeah, it’s…” 

The door creaks and their heads turn to you, exiting the front door. 

“Who’s driving?” you ask.

“Jason,” Leo replies. You open the passenger side door, gently place the coffin shaped box on the seat, and buckle it in. You can feel their inquisitive eyes on you, and you counter with a blank, resolute look of your own.

“This one’s special.” 

You notice Leo seems… off. His whole mood seems to have plummeted. Leo reminds you of a buoy. Even in the worst storms, even if he gets caught under a huge wave, he always comes back to the surface. Based on his current vibe, someone nuked the buoy. Wheels turn in your head, and you hand him the trout mailbox. 

“Could you put this in the back?” you direct your words at him, hoping the heat flushing to his cheeks would distract him from whatever made him upset. His hand brushes yours and you can almost feel his heart spasm. You make eye contact at him through your thick, dark eyelashes and he almost chokes. He agrees and you pull Jason aside. 

“What happened?” you hiss. 

“What?” he whispers back.

“What did you tell him to make him all lame?��

“Oh, uh…” he rubs the back of his neck and you shake your head, waiting for an answer, “Calypso’s… not coming back with us.”  You wait in silence for him to keep talking. 

“She said she wanted to see the world more, and she’d meet us back at camp in a few days.” You process this for a second.

“So he’s-” you catch movement out of the corner of your eye, “driving?” you ask Leo, who just came back from the trunk.

“Jason, I mean.” you clarify. He confirms, and you all get in the car - Jason up front, you and Leo in the back. You reach into your bag and hand Jason a cd that says ’fun sad angry music :)’. He stares at you through the rear view mirror. You stare back. You sip your coffee. 

“Well?” you ask, “Are you going to put it in the player or eat it?” His eyes dart to Leo’s. “She gets to choose the music,” he explains. Jason mutters in agreement and fumbles the disk into the slot. A smile spreads on your face as the music plays and he starts to drive. 

Leo watches you as you nod your head and mouth the lyrics. He can tell you love this song. You vibe to the music for a minute before glancing over at Leo. He realizes he’s been staring when you give him an expectant look.

“What.” you ask. 

“Uh, this song is really good,” interest tints your face, and he’s relieved he recovered okay, “what’s it called?” You’re a little surprised he likes it.

“Mr. Doctor Man by Palaye Royale.” You two enjoy the music in silence, Jason focused on the road and GPS directions. A minute later, your curiosity starts to get the better of you. “How far is it?” 

“Not far, a couple hours.” Leo replies.

“Is everyone there all… campfire songs and friendship bracelets? Cause I’ve never been like, a summer camp person,” your eyes flick to the side towards him for a moment, and he can tell you’re listening closely. He smiles a little. 

“So what kind of person are you?”

“I’m more of a… cult documentaries and obscure unsettling 1960’s Czech animations type.” He’d never heard the words “1960’s Czech animations” sound so hot. 

“What about you?”

He paused for a minute. Part of him was deciding how to respond, and the other part was just flattered giggling that she had asked him back. You talk for the next hour or two, Jason chiming in periodically, until he points out that it’s getting dark and you should find somewhere to stay for the night. 

“Okay,” you reply, “pull over at the next truck stop.” 

They’re a little confused, but Jason complies and pulls over at the next gas station/convenience store you come across. They watch you get out of the car without a word and walk into the store. You approach a guy near a soda display. He has on a fedora and a shirt with a kids video game logo on it. He stares at you absolutely transfixed. They can’t hear what you’re saying, but he has a dopey grin on his face and nods his head a lot. Your hand touches his arm gently, and he laughs so loudly (and nervously) they hear it from the car. 

“Do I look that dumb around her?” Leo asks. 

You tilt your head and he blushes and nods again. He hands you something and a second later, you two walk to the counter. The cashier looks up startled, and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. She stares at you for a second, then says something and fumbles with a cellphone you hand her. She hands you a paper a few seconds later. You give the guy his phone back. He walks to an ATM at the corner of the store. He walks over to you, but you’re in front of a display so they can’t see anything until you come back out. You get back in the car and hand Jason a piece of paper and a wad of cash.

“Got us a room at a Best Western like, ten minutes away. And some cash.” 

They stare at you in silence. You lean toward Jason. 

“The room is under your name, Kevin Grossman.” Leo bites back a laugh. 

You finally get to the hotel, and Jason flips on his turn signal to get into the parking lot. “Park at the Walmart over there,” you point a block or two up, “under a light.” He turns his blinker off. 

“Walmart doesn’t care if you park overnight. If someone sees our car at the parking lot of a hotel, we’re just leaving a target on our backs.” you explain. They don’t say anything. 

“You said monsters are after us, right?” 

“Yeah,” Leo said, “good thinking.” Jason agreed and you exit the car, remembering to grab the duffle bag with your clothes and other essentials. You all walk across the street to the hotel. You talk your way through checking in pretty easily. When the hostess asks to see your in app registry you hand her the printed ticket. “His phone died.” you say simply. The three of you are about to head up to your room, when you turn back to reception. You hesitate for a second, before leaning in to the receptionist.

“Can you put us as unlisted?” you ask quietly. 

“Of course,” she replies sincerely, “let me know if you need anything.”

On the way up to your room, you tell Jason and Leo that if anyone asks, you’re not here. They seem impressed. Your room has a small seating area with a couch, coffee table, coat rack, and a phone. Past the half wall are three beds, a desk, a TV, and a doorway you figure leads to the bathroom. You walk into the bathroom and touch the mirror. You notice the space between your finger and reflection, and move on. You call to Leo to turn off the lights. He and Jason share a look. You may be a little weird, and incredibly intimidating, but you haven’t steered them wrong yet. Leo hits the lights, and you said quietly, “Listen for any weird buzzing or beeping noises, and look out for any out of place lights,” you creep around the room very quietly. After a minute you turn the lights back on and look at the ceiling.

“What was that about?” Jason asks.

“Bugs,” you reply, not looking at him, “and not the fun kind,” you mutter. 

“Jason, can you reach that?” you point up at the smoke detector. He looked between you and the device on the ceiling. 

“Don’t think so.” You looked between him and Leo. Your head might hit the ceiling if you Jason gave you a boost, but you could probably access it fine with Leo’s help. 

“Leo,” you said, and he looked up from the wires he was fiddling with, “give me boost,” your gaze not leaving the smoke detector. He agrees, and you get up onto his shoulders. His hands rest just above your knees, and it takes all his focus to not burst into flames. You pop off the cover.

“This doesn’t look weird, right?” you ask him. He looks up and back at your face, hair angled down, and is reminded of the Spiderman kiss. He pushes away the thought and examines the smoke detector. 

“About as non-weird as a smoke detector can look,” he confirms, and helps you down. He’s incredibly impressed that you thought to look for bugs - even he hadn’t thought of that, and he’s a son of Hephaestus. 

“Where did you learn this stuff? The parking lot, being unlisted, checking for bugs?” You half exhale half scoff.

“When almost everyone in a five mile radius constantly wants to get in your pants, they can get… pushy… so you learn some stuff.” You grab your pajamas from your bag and head toward the bathroom. Leo and Jason meet eyes. It made more sense now, why you were always so intimidating. If he got constant unwanted attention, Leo would get pretty prickly, too. 

Once everyone had showered and gotten ready for bed, Jason pointed out someone should IM Chiron, but you were way too tired, and collectively agreed to update him in the morning. 

Right as he’s about to fall asleep, Leo feels like someone’s watching him. He opens his eyes, and sees Calypso’s face. His heart lurches. He pushes himself out of bed and sees the shimmery edges of the iris message. She opens her mouth and he holds a finger to his lips. He moves over to the couch, so he doesn’t wake the others. He sits down nervously.

“Hey, sunshine… I really miss you, what’s-” 

“Look, Leo, I… I can’t do this.” 

His stomach drops. 

He knows what’s happening. He had it coming, he knew that. He knew that this was probably inevitable. Still, that didn’t make it hurt any less. He tries to sputter out something, anything. Why, what, can he do anything to fix this, but he’s too choked up. 

“I need a break from this, from us…” she continues, “there’s so much of the world I haven’t seen yet, and you have your projects… I don’t want to hold myself back because I feel bad that you’re not with me. I want to experience everything.” He feels like he’s falling forward. His eyebrows knit and an unstoppable rush of memories of everyone who’s left him or kicked him out comes flooding back. 

“Calypso,” his voice cracks. He can’t finish the sentence. 

You wake up from the light sleep you had settled into, aware of an unfamiliar voice. You get up, throwing on the short black robe over your pajamas - despite their velvet material, the loose cami and shorts don’t provide much warmth. You tiptoe over to the seating area. Leo’s on the couch, staring at the floor. You walk up behind him and place a hand on his shoulder. 

“You okay?” you ask, your voice foggy with sleep. 

“Who-” you briefly see the unfamiliar voice is coming from a shimmery image of a pissed off girl floating in front of him, but he quickly swipes his hand through, and the image vanishes. He rubs his eyes and his hands come away damp. You stay quiet. You don’t want to make him feel worse. 

“Long day,” he mutters. He stands up and says goodnight without looking at you. You watch him get into bed, and you do the same. Even if you knew what was wrong, there wasn’t much you could do this late at night. You hope some rest makes him feel better, and tell yourself it’ll be dealt with in the morning. 

Maybe over coffee. 

You could use some coffee.

[sundowncryptid]

My HTTYD 3 Criticisms

This is gonna be a long one so I’m gonna put my criticisms under a read more

Just wanted to make a post listing all of the HTTYD 3 criticisms I have (this isn’t an attack on people who liked the movie, it’s totally valid if you did, I just want to list some stuff that I didn’t like and stuff that, in my opinion, didn’t work in the movie)

- The Light Fury logically shouldn’t have been able to cloak in the first scene when she’s caged up, she would have needed to fly through a plasma blast and there’s no way she did that whilst caged??

- Snotlout hitting on Valka was just really weird and uncomfortable

- There’s no way Grimmel killed all of the Night Furies, he’s just one man with a bunch of Deathgrippers and a crossbow

- The Deathgrippers are portrayed as an ‘evil’ species of dragon, but the dragons are said to be just wild animals?? How can a wild animal be ‘evil’ and have evil intentions if they’re just wild animals? It’s not their fault that their diet consists of other dragons

- The Deathgrippers are also being controlled, drugged and held captive by Grimmel too, just like the Light Fury, but they don’t also deserve to be rescued too??

- If the Light Fury is so scared of humans why did she decide to pick Hiccup up and yeet him?? Surely she would have tried to avoid being seen and especially being touched by them after being caged and drugged by dragon hunters?? If Toothless had looked like he was in danger I could understand her trying to intervene and get rid of Hiccup but she intentionally came towards him unprovoked

- The Light Fury tried to kill Hiccup twice and Toothless didn’t growl once?? (I know she’s scared and I don’t blame her for lashing out at humans after being drugged and caged but I would’ve expected a stronger reaction from Toothless) But in the third date scene the Light Fury steps on a line in his drawing and that’s when he chooses to growl at her

- it feels like all of the other villains in the movie were just dumbed down to make Grimmel look smart

- Grimmel’s Night Fury info contradicts what the franchise has said or shown about Night Furies previously:

1. He said that Night Furies can’t fly for long periods without rest, yet Toothless has one of the biggest wing surface area to body ratios in the franchise and his wings are soaring wings like an eagles, and so he should be able to fly for maybe 4-6 hours straight without rest

2. He said Night Furies can’t survive cold temperatures but Toothless has been living in Berk for 6 years without an issue, and Berk is supposed to be freezing for most of the year according to Hiccup

- New Berk is only accessible by dragon, so how does New Berk trade with other villages? And sail out to catch fish for food? After all of the dragons are gone??

- Night Furies having the ability to cloak is pointless, they’re nocturnal and camouflaged when flying at night so they don’t need to be able to cloak. Idk maybe it could be a leftover adaption that they retained??

- Hiccup is portrayed as ‘naive’ for thinking that Toothless will come back to him

Toothless and Hiccup don’t have a parent-kid relationship. That would suggest that Toothless wants to get away from Hiccup and be more independent, yet he never showed an interest in flying without Hiccup until the Light Fury came along, and that was only because she wouldn’t let Hiccup get near her. If Toothless never showed signs wanting to leave Hiccup or fly on his own in the past then why is Hiccup naive for thinking that he’ll come back?

- Just a small thing but I would’ve liked to see Valka discovering the Hidden World with Hiccup, it would’ve been a nice to see them bonding over the discovery and it could’ve shown how far their mother-son relationship has come in a year

- The Mushroom Forest in the Hidden World must produce spores, and long exposure to mushroom spores causes lung inflammation so surely the dragons living in the Hidden World wouldn’t be able to breathe properly and would get sick from breathing in spores??

- The Light Furies don’t seem to fit with the Hidden World’s bright, saturated colours, their white, pale scales would stand out against the colourful vegetation growing there

- What if a group of Deathgrippers infiltrated the Hidden World? Wouldn’t the Hidden World dragons be trapped and cornered inside?

- Toothless didn’t consider his flock at all when he disappeared with the Light Fury for a day, shouldn’t he have been with them to help protect them just in case, especially since Grimmel just burned down their previous home and may still be tracking them?

- How can Toothless be the king of the hidden world, a place he only discovered hours ago, and command it? Wouldn’t the dragons there already have an alpha dragon??

- It would’ve been nice to have a moment in the Hidden World where Toothless seems homesick and misses Hiccup, just to know he at least still cares about him and hasn’t forgotten

- When the Light Fury comes back to New Berk and smells Grimmel she flies towards him instead of the opposite way??

- Toothless sacrifices his entire flock (including hatchlings) and lets them be caged up by the dragon hunters to save a girl he only met 3 days ago (not saying he shouldn’t care about the Light Fury but he should probably care a lot more about the well-being of the flock he’s been in charge of and has known for a year)

- The Light Fury is somehow aware enough in her drugged state to be able to fly straight with Grimmel on her back in the final chase scene (same point applies to the Deathgrippers throughout the entire movie now that I think about it)

- The Deathgrippers that were still attached to Grimmel’s airship as it crashed into the water weren’t at least attempted to be rescued and were left to drown

- The Deathgrippers shouldn’t have been able to catch up to two of the fastest dragons species in the franchise in the final chase scene

- Coming to the conclusion of the dragons leaving felt rushed and out of the blue

- The message at the end of this film totally contradicts the other two films; the first movie was based around the fact that dragons aren’t the wild, savage beasts that they are thought to be, but beings capable of human-like intelligence and emotion. HTTYD 3 contradicts this by saying the dragons are just wild animals and they can’t help following and listening to instinct.

HTTYD 2’s end message was even though there are bad people out there, we will still fight for what’s right, even if we have to go up against armies and armadas, we will change the world bit by bit so that people and dragons can live together in peace.

HTTYD 3 scraps that message and instead of fighting for the dragons and changing the world for the better, the dragons are just sent away to hide in a hole in the ocean indefinitely and are just left to hope that someone picks up where Berk left off. They beat the warlords pretty easily, Grimmel is gone and the Light Fury has started coming around to Hiccup so why do the dragons have to go all of a sudden?? New Berk isn’t accessible by bad guys (unless they have control of a dragon) and Berk has an entire flock of dragons on their side controlled by a Night Fury so their island is easily defendable.

They are in one of the best positions to continue rescuing, saving and protecting dragons yet that’s when they choose to give up?? Hiccup didn’t even give up in HTTYD 2 when his dad was killed by Drago but he beats a bunch of warlords and an apparently famed Night Fury hunter and that’s when he gives up?? It doesn’t make sense to me

- Toothless was able to smell the Light Fury from miles away in the exodus scene but wasn’t able to smell Hiccup from the rock he was lying on in that decade time skip and almost attacked him and his family, even though in the first film when Toothless was an actual wild dragon he knew Hiccup wasn’t a threat if he wasn’t holding a weapon

- Kinda bummed that Toothless’ appearance didn’t change between the ages of 21 and 31 in that decade time skip, I expected more nubs (the Light Fury too)

- The Homecoming short just proves that if people and dragons aren’t united anymore things just kind of almost go back to the way they were in HTTYD 1 (making the whole 6 years of human-dragon companionship just kind of pointless), the new generations of Berk will never grow up with dragons alongside them and see with their own eyes that they are more than just wild beasts (and apparently they weren’t being taught about dragons either until they put on the show about them according to the short), and dragons will never grow up alongside humans to see that some are good and want to help them, not trap and kill them.

- How is someone in the future supposed to pick up where Berk left off fighting for the dragons and uniting them when the Hidden World is so hostile towards humans?? No human is able to enter without getting swarmed by dragons

If you made it all the way to the bottom thanks for reading :] and again, I’m not trying to attack anyone who liked the movie, I’m just listing the things I, personally, didn’t like about it and the things that I thought didn’t work.

[sincerelymarinette]

Life Swap - Adrien Agreste x Marinette Dupain-Cheng

Words: 2215 Summary: Marinette Dupain-Cheng is the heiress to her father's fashion house, Dupain Designs. With her talented assistant, the baker's son, Adrien Agreste by her side, will they come up with the right ideas and be able to meet their deadline? Author's Note: ahhhh i love this so much. It was so much fun to write! I got inspiration from @chocoluckchipz on Tumblr with their beautiful life swap art for adrienette April! They are aged up a bit in this and it still has superheroes but PRE REVEAL. Gabriel or Tom is not Hawkmoth. I love life swaps/reverse crush sm. I kinda have an idea for a part 2 but idk I wanna see how this goes :) let me know if you want to see a part two!

---

"Shit, shit, shit, shit," Adrien mumbled to himself as he rushed through the busy streets of Paris, trying to contain his bag and the few coffees he was carrying. He was almost late for work, which he was unsure how he still had a job from his constant shenanigans (possibly caused by a slight crush), but he was still thankful he had his job.

"Marinette!" Adrien huffed when he reached the Dupain Designs office, more specifically, the head designer and heiress. "I'm so sorry. I got stuck at the coffee shop and-"

Marinette shook her head with a small smile. "Adrien, careful! Are you alright?"

"I'm coffee- coffee's fine," He stammered out. "I mean, I'm fine. Here's your coffee," He said and handed it to her as she set her files down on her desk. Once he smoothed out his shirt with his free hand, he took a deep break. "Sorry about that. Can I grab you anything else right now?"

"Thank you," Marinette smiled. "But yes, my scanner is still broken, and I was up all night working on these. Can you go to the copy room and scan them to my email really quickly? Once you get back, we can go look at fabrics, and I can start a mock-up for the designs," Marinette explained and handed Adrien the files.

"Right away!" He said, his face still a bit red, and practically ran out of the room with the files. Marinette only smiled as she watched him stumble away, then went to sit behind her desk.

"I'm surprised you haven't fired him yet," Plagg flew out from his hiding spot.

"Plagg!" Marinette whispered-screamed. "My office is all glass, people could see you!"

Plagg crossed his arms. "Kid, they're all too afraid of you to even look your way. You are kind of in charge around here."

She laughed. "That's my dad."

"Yeah, but you're the heiress to the company and basically the world's biggest designer in the fashion industry right now," Plagg reasoned. "Now, explain to me why you haven't fired Mr. Spill Your Late Coffee?"

"That's a long nickname," Marinette commented and typed her password into her computer. "I don't know; I like him. He makes me laugh, and I like having an assistant my age. Most times they're either older and think they know more than me, or too young and don't want to do anything. Adrien may be a bit late and clumsy, but he's talented, and I like him," She explained. "Oh! And plus, his dad owns a bakery, so he brings me cookies sometimes. That's always nice."

Plagg stared at her for a second. "Do you like him?" He asked.

Marinette shook her head. "Just as a friend. You know I'm in love with Mister Bug."

"Blah blah blah, you humans and your love," He complained. "All I love is cheese."

"I know," Marinette sighed. "If only it were that easy for me."

In the copy room, Adrien was trying to pull himself together. "Why do I have to be such a fool?" He groaned.

"You're not a fool, Adrien," Tikki reminded him as she flew out of his pocket.

"I'm sure Marinette thinks so," He said.

"If Marinette thought that, you wouldn't be working with her. You've had this job for, what, almost a year now? If she didn't like you and your clumsiness, she wouldn't keep you around," Tikki reasoned with the boy.

Adrien sighed and grabbed the papers out of the scanner, waiting for confirmation. "I guess you have a point. "Maybe if I weren't so stupid around her, things would be easier. I can barely get out two words without stuttering."

Tikki flew in front of Adrien, ensuring she had his attention. "It's just because you like her. I doubt she even notices," She said. "Now, hurry up and grab the rest of the papers and head back to her office so you can go help her with fabrics."

Adrien did what Tikki said and hurried back to Marinette's office. As soon as he set the files down, Marinette grabbed her laptop, and the two of them headed to the fabric room on the other side of the building. Lining the walls were pictures from Marinette's modeling days from her childhood all the way through high school. Modeling all ended when she expressed her interest (and talent) in design, and practically blew up overnight when she was announced as the new head designer a few years ago. But that didn't mean her father would ever let her forget how successful she was in modeling, and those pictures would be there forever.

When they got into the fabric room, Marinette hooked her laptop up to the screen on the wall so they could view the sketches to their fullest potential. "I'm thinking of light pink silk for the one on the left, but it could also work with a pattern. What do you think, Adrien?" Marinette asked as she held the two fabrics in front of her. "The silk makes it more like loungewear, but the pattern makes it more office-appropriate."

Adrien stared at her, lost in thought for a minute. "Adrien?" Marinette repeated. "What do you think?"

Since Adrien wasn't getting the message through to his head, he was brought back to reality when Tikki hit his chest from his shirt pocket. "Oh! Uh, I think you could both do- I mean do both, actually. Use the silk on the inside, and the pattern for the outside," Adrien explained. "It could be reversible if you find a matching pattern, or just use it way one- one way," Adrien continued to correct himself. He was usually nervous around Marinette, but it was even worse when she was asking his opinion. He loves fashion, and it can take his mind off most things, but when it comes to Marinette...it's all a gamble.

"Do both? As a reversible jacket?" Marinette raised her eyebrows and looked at the sketch on the wall. A few moments of silence passed before she opened her mouth again. "That is an excellent idea. This could totally work for both professional and casual, and by mixing the different types of fabric, it won't be too heavy, or too light," Marinette smiled wide and turned back to Adrien. "You always have such great ideas! Now, I know I want to use this pink, so let's find a pattern that goes well with it."

---

It was dark out; most people already in bed. Marinette let Adrien go home hours ago, and her parents ducked out for a date night. Marinette, however, was still behind her sewing machine working on perfecting her jacket design and figuring out the best way to make it reversible. It wouldn't be perfect the first time, but she was going to try her hardest.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Plagg remarked from a shelf with a piece of Camembert in his hands.

"Yes," Marinette said, leaning back in her chair to give her back a break. "This could do so well, especially with the business line I'm working on. Go from business to casual in one easy swoop, Adrien really has some good ideas," She complimented. "See, I told you there's a good reason to keep him around."

"You do know what time it is, right?" Plagg asked and pointed to the window.

Marinette shrugged as she looked out. "Yeah, but, I have deadlines."

"Don't you make the deadlines?"

"And what kind of boss would I be if I didn't meet my own deadlines? I want my designers to meet them, it will be a bad example if I don't meet them," Marinette explained, followed by a yawn.

Plagg set the piece of cheese down and flew over to Marinette, blocking her sight to the sewing machine. "Kid, you've had a long day. The machine will still be here tomorrow. You need to get something to eat; all you had for dinner was an apple. Go pick up some food and go home," Plagg tried to persuade the stubborn Marinette. "Get a good night's sleep and ask Adrien to bring some treats tomorrow so both of you can work all day to meet your deadline," Plagg said. Most times, he was sarcastic and annoying, but he really did care about Marinette. Between her crazy designer job and having to save Paris from supervillains, she needed all the rest she could get at night.

Marinette took a deep breath and stood up from behind the machine. She ripped out a piece of paper and left a note: Marinette's. DO NOT TOUCH. It was one way to get a point across in case anyone happened to make it there before her.

After she turned off all the lights and collected her things, she went out of the back exit so she could grab some quick food from a random shop open nearby, then head back to her car right afterward. She wasn't worried that it was late; she could defend herself if anything were to happen.

Once she got her food, she took a slow walk back to her car. Though it was dark, it wasn't very cold, and she was enjoying the fresh air and the quiet streets. The moon was bright and let off just enough light, but the side effect of Plagg did leave her with pretty good sight in the night.

"Miss Dupain-Cheng?" She heard a voice from behind her, then a loud thump on the ground. "What are you doing out so late? Are you okay?"

Marinette turned around, not sure who to expect. Once she saw Mister Bug, she relaxed and mentally told Plagg to stand down. "Oh, Mister Bug, to what do I owe the honor?" She asked, a slight blush appearing on her cheeks. Thank god it was dark, he wouldn't be able to see.

"I was doing a late-night survey and saw you walking. It's late and wanted you on check- I mean, wanted to check on you!" He said quickly. "Are you okay?"

Marinette shook her head with a laugh. "I'm fine, just a long day and late night in the studio. Deadlines," She shrugged,

"Oh! Well-well that's good. Can I walk your car back to you?" He asked. "Agh! Can I walk you back to your car?" Mister Bug corrected himself.

Marinette tucked the few loose strands of hair behind her ear. "I would love that, actually," She said. "No bad guys you have to take care of, right?"

"Not that I spotted. But trouble seems to lurk around you," Mister Bug said as they started walking. "I mean! Because you're such a big name, you've had a few run-ins..." He cringed.

Nodding, Marinette thought. "Yeah, a few times, I guess. Normally it's at releases, or if someone spots me at a store because either my clothes are expensive or they didn't like what I created. But I can hold my own," She smirked.

"Oh, oh, I'm sure of it! I didn't mean to-"

"I'm just messing with you," She cleared up. The walk from the store to her car wasn't very long, and Mister Bug interrupted when she was already halfway back, so the walk didn't last forever. "Thank you for checking on me; you really are a great hero of Paris," She said. "I hope I'll see you around," Marinette smiled and got in her car, waving before she drove away.

Plagg flew out from his spot in Marinette's purse. "Bleh!" He pretended to puke. "You're so gross, Marinette! Both of you are!"

"Plagg, I'm only going to do it more because it annoys you so much," She joked. "Besides, you have nothing to worry about. I don't think Mister Bug particularly cares for Lady Noire so much," She sighed. "Let's just get home and end the night."

As soon as Marinette drove away, Mister Bug flew off in the opposite direction near his apartment. As soon as he landed on his bed, he transformed. "Tikki, spots off!" He squealed. "Ahh, I walked Marinette to her car! And I think I held myself together pretty well."

"Aw, Adrien, I'm proud of you," Tikki said. "Now only if you could do it at work, too!"

Adrien glared at Tikki, jokingly. "I'm trying, it's hard. She's so sweet," He admired, putting his face into a pillow. "When we get married, do you think she'll want a hamster?"

"Adrien, I think you're thinking too far into the future," Tikki giggled.

"You're right! We should get one before we get married!" He celebrated, but was cut off by his phone going off. "Oh my gosh, it's Marinette."

Marinette Dupain-Cheng: Hey Adrien, great work today. We've got a busy day tomorrow. Any chance you can bring some pastries from your dad's bakery? (Plus the coffee I like- we'll need it) I'll pay for everything.

Adrien Agreste: Hey Marinette! Of course, I'm sure my dad would spare some. He likes you, he won't make you pay. I'll be sure to bring extra coffee for the extra-long day!

"See Plagg, another reason to keep him around," Marinette said and set her phone down to start digging into dinner.

"Tikki, tomorrow is going to be awesome," Adrien said. "I have to be on time!"

[xxfanfiction-emo-trinityxx]

Serenade -  Frank Iero x Reader

Request: Hey could I request Trish? Frank Oreo asks reader to prom. Really fluffly and Funny maybe cringey? Idk Warnings: super cheesy, somewhat cringey maybe? I think it’s cringey a little. In a sweet way. Word count: 1 831

“Proms suck.”

“Yesterday you sounded a lot more enthusiastic about it,” Gerard giggled over his lunch.

“Yesterday I didn’t consider that (y/n) might say no,” Frank exclaimed.

“They won’t, don’t worry,” Mikey shrugged.

It was a not very well kept secret that Frank was terribly in love with you, and it was an equally bad kept secret that you were just as much in love with him too. The only people doubting that? The two of you. Frank thought someone as clever and pretty as you could never be in love with him, and you were convinced someone as talented and badass as him would never be interested in someone as ordinary as you. So both of you thought the stories the other students were telling you were just made up lies.

“You don’t know that,” Frank whined, unhappily staring at his pasta.

“Yeah, well, I think we do, but if it would make you feel any better, we could help you make a plan,” Gerard offered, not at all worried, unlike Frank.

“What kind of plan,” he now perked up.

“Dude, how am I supposed to know? I read comics and watch old horror movies all day long, I don’t know anything about being romantic,” Gerard shrugged, “we’ll just make something up.”

“Shush now, they’re coming over,” Mikey warned, just in time, pointing out that you were walking up to your group of friends.

“Does anyone want to exchange their chocolate pudding for vanilla,” you asked, sitting down next to Frank, who quickly exchanged your little cup with dessert with his.

~*~

It was still a week until prom, when finally the plan the three friends were working on, got finished. Frank had started to panic already, because how small would the chance be that you did not have a date yet? He even had heard other boys talking about asking you to prom, but when he had talked to you this morning, you had told him that you did not have anyone to go with. And so he slipped the red rose with the little note into your locker.

After the first two classes, you returned to your locker to pick up the books for the next class, but instead of your books, a red flower fell out of it. Surprised you managed to catch the rose before it tumbled to the ground. Curiously you unfolded the typewriter written note that was tied to the stem of it.

“Dear (y/n), I don’t want to reveal my name just yet, but I thought you looked very pretty today, I hope you have a great day.”

Confused you raised your eyebrows and glanced left and right down the corridor. The usual students were walking past, nobody paying you especially attention, except for Gerard who waved over from the other side of the corridor.

“What’s this,” he asked curiously, knowing very well that you had just found Frank’s first gift.

“I don’t know,” you furrowed your eyebrows, showing Gerard the note, “someone hitting on me?”

“Aw, (y/n), that’s cute,” he smiled, but it froze on his face as he saw that instead of being happy you still looked confused.

“I don’t want it,” you mumbled quietly, only for him to hear.

Yes, you were flattered, but you did not want anyone to be interested in you, if they were not Frank.

“What, why not,” shocked Gerard pulled you aside.

“Because-“ you looked up at the taller, dark haired boy, “Frank!”

Gerard had known about your crush for a long time, and now he was not even allowed to tell you that it was in fact Frank who had sent you the message.

“Maybe you can try to find out who it is, and let them down gently then,” he suggested, “Maybe don’t throw away the flower immediately, the guy surely knows you found it already, and would be really upset about it if you threw it away straight away.”

“But I don’t want it,” you argued. It even made you feel uncomfortable; having someone’s attention, knowing you would hurt them if you did not return their feelings.

“You can throw it away after school,” Gerard argued, knowing that if things went smoothly, you would have found out by then that it was Frank who was trying to woo you, “this way you at least show that, while you might not return their feelings, you don’t dismiss them, but care about their feelings.”

You nodded, even though you felt uneasy, and together with Gerard you walked to the next class. As soon as you had entered the room, you noticed something was off. The students already in the room, kept glancing over to your desk, and sure enough, there was a second rose. Confused you walked over, and picked it up, this time no note was attached.

Shooting Gerard a look, you collected the rose in your arm with the other one.

And so it continued, every lesson and every break you found a new rose, on your desk, in your locker, and once even a younger student ran up to you, and handed you a flower. You tried to ask him who had told him to give this to you, but instead the boy had just giggled, and run of again.

There were no further notes until you went to your locker after the last class. At this point you were carrying at least twelve roses in your arm, all together huge, beautiful, lovely smelling flowers with deep red petals. Once more a rose tumbled out of your locker, together with a note. Quickly you picked up the note, and added the flower to the bunch in your arm. By now you were not sure if you were feeling flattered or uncomfortable anymore. You thought that if you were not so much in love with Frank, you definitely would give whoever had made such an effort, a chance. Now you unfolded the note, once again typewriter written, not giving away the author by the handwriting.

“I think it’s pretty clear now, how I feel about you. Would you do me the honour and accompany me to the prom? Meet me in the schoolyard, I’ll be waiting.”

Quickly, forgetting even to drop your books off first, you slammed the locker door shut, and turned around on your heels. You were curious to find out who had sent you all these flowers.

When you came closer to the yard, you noticed the students that were standing outside, some giggling, most pointing at a person who stood in the middle of the yard. Quickly you walked outside, and carefully pushed past a few students, to see who the person was.

To you surprise it was Frank, holding a ukulele that hung from his neck. No, that couldn’t be. That had to be some coincidence, or a bad joke. But just in that moment his eyes met yours. You could see him swallow nervously before he spoke up.

“(Y/n), this one is for you,” he spoke, his voice loud, but slightly shaky. He played a few chords on his ukulele before he began singing. “Wise men say-“

You could hear people giggling, some even started laughing, most were looking between you and him. At the side of the crowd you could see Gerard hiding behind his hands. A blush burnt terribly on your cheeks. You had never expected to be the centre of such attention, or to get a song sung for you, not to mind in front of a crowd, especially not at school. But Frank’s voice was clear and beautiful, and carried well over the yard, the sweet words and quiet chords of the instrument making tears sting at the corner of your eyes.

Unluckily not everyone was as moved as you were. Around you people started laughing and bickering, but Frank continued playing, his eyes fixed on you, scared, but also full of hope. When people started talking louder and louder, making fun of him, and how you surely wouldn’t say yes now, he just played and sung louder, making your heart break more, before your feet finally listened to your head, and moved forwards.

Quickly you pushed past the people, and crossed the small patch of grass between the edge of the crowd and Frank. On your way you dropped the roses, which you had still been carrying, to the ground, and embraced him, interrupting his play. Confused his arms fell to his side, as you nuzzled your nose into his neck, trying not to squeeze the ukulele too hard between your bodies.

“Yes, yes, yes,” you whispered, just loud enough for him to hear, “I’d love to go to prom with you.”

Surprised he pulled away, a smile slowly creeping up on his face.

“Really?”

“I want nothing more,” you grinned, and following an instinct, you took his face in your hands, and kissed him on the lips.

Around you cheers and applause erupted, but you could not have cared less, because Frank finally reacted and copied your movement, placing his hands on your face too, pulling your closer, without crashing the instrument that dangled between you.

When you eventually were able to focus on something that was not Frank again, the yard had emptied, and you were alone. Brushing your nose against Frank’s, you pulled away.

“You know, you could have just asked,” you giggled, finally remembering the flowers you had dropped earlier, and went to collect them.

“I didn’t think you’d say yes,” Frank confessed, swinging the ukulele to his back, and helped you pick up the roses.

“So you wanted to guilt trip me,” you joked.

“Make you fall in love with me,” Frank corrected seriously.

“Moron,” you giggled, and got up, having collected everything off the ground, “I’ve been in love with you for ages.”

Frank placed the few flowers he had picked up, in your arm as well.

“Then we’ve wasted a lot of time, I’m afraid,” he shook his head, “because I honestly can’t remember the last time I haven’t been in love with you too.”

You laughed at his stupid cheesiness, and leant your head against his shoulder.

“Then we’ve got some catching up to do, don’t you think? How about we go out for coffee,” you asked boldly.

You knew he would not turn down such an offer, after all he was one of your closest friends, and you knew him well enough to predict his answer. Although you really had not noticed that he liked you.

“When,” Frank asks, slowly starting to stroll towards the school’s exit.

“Right now?”

Frank chuckled and nodded, throwing an arm around your shoulder.

“I like that,” he grinned.

“I like you,” you answered without missing a beat, making both of you laugh.

“I like you too, a lot,” Frank giggled, and nuzzled his nose against your ear quickly before concentrating on walking again; and together you made your way to your favourite café, arm in arm.

Taglist (if you want to be added or taken off, please let me know):

General: @justawriterinprogress @robinruns @jayloverthe3rd @lookalivefrosty @butterfly-writes @angelevansfalls @rene-royale @500240

MCR: @deadlovers

[ladybugsfanfics]

a different kind of torment | Peter Parker

Pairing: Peter Parker x read

Style: One Shot

WC: 1.8k

Warnings: Angst, idk 

Summary: After Green Goblin discovers Spider-Man's real identity, he threatenes the people Peter Parker loves. That includes you, and that includes a safe house where you can't see each other. inspired by the song Remember Me from the Coco movie as a part of @valkyriesride​ writing challenge

A/N: i made it within midnight (at least for me). I’ve been procrastinating this for so long, have no idea how good it is, but here it is and I hope you all enjoy. Peter and the reader are in college in this (not aged up for any other reason than the fact that the comics have Peter’s identity found out by Green Goblin in college so i got it from there) 

Despite the propped open textbook and the two notebooks in front of Peter, he can’t concentrate on the words in front of him. The letters swirl around the pages like alphabet soup. And though the sauna like air around him is making him sweat profusely, that’s not the main reason he can’t focus. 

There are two reasons. One of them being the fact that you’re lying on the couch, shedding one piece of clothing after another. Peter finds that weird, seeing as you were the one insisting on turning up the heater. But he also finds it highly annoying as you’re taking away his focus and he has an upcoming test in two days. There’s already enough keeping his mind occupied, his pants tightening isn’t helping. 

“Hey, Pete,” you tilt your head up from your phone. Peter raises his gaze from your bare legs to your face. “You done with studying yet?” 

He chuckles as he shakes his head. “Why would you think that?” 

You shrug. “Just that you weren’t exactly looking at the textbook.” The smirk that colors your face is unmistakable. Peter does his best not to indulge, diverting his gaze back to the pages before him. 

He doesn’t see you stand up and make your way to where he sits, doesn’t notice it until one of your arms trail down his chest and your warm breath brushes by his ear. “You sure you’re not done, yet?” 

Peter leans back to your touch, enough to see the smirk and lust in your eyes. You place a kiss along his jaw, and move the way to his lips. Peter’s hand instantly comes up to cup your face as he presses his lips against yours. He scoots his chair back, giving you room to swing your leg over his lap. Even with the change in position, your lips are locked together. 

It also makes for easier access up Peter’s shirt. Your hands move around the hem of it, fingers teasing the bare skin until your hands glide under his sweater and over his chest. Peter’s own hands move across your thighs, sliding up and down, and he can feel his pants tightening by every little movement. 

A stifled moan escapes when you press your tongue into his mouth and your hands slide lower and lower, teasing the lining of his pants. Only, the dread of a conversation Peter’s delayed for far too long―it’s been delayed two hours, but that is far too long considering the importance of the conversation―keeps him from indulging further.

“Y/N,” he says, pulling away you. 

You cock your head. “Something wrong, baby?” you ask, frown plastered on your face in concern. 

Peter swallows, because god he wishes something wasn’t wrong. But something is, and you need to know. “Uhh, yeah.” He presses his lips together and avoids your gaze. 

“Tell me.” Your voice is firm, and the finger that comes under his chin and moves his head back to you, is scorching. 

“Umm, okay, so… There’s this thing, that happened.” Peter bites his lower lip, but no matter how much he wants to, he can’t stop looking into your eyes. They sparkle as usual, but the power in your eyes holds his gaze. He takes a deep breath. “Something happened. It involves you.” 

You frown. “Spider-man happened?” 

Peter nods. “You remember Green Goblin, right?”

“That big green idiot you fought a while back?” Peter nods. “Yeah, why?”

“He found out my identity and he’s threatened everyone I love and that includes you and now you have to move to a safe house.” His mouth moves so fast he’s unsure you actually heard what he said. But when he sees the look in your eyes and the expression on your face, he knows you did. 

“I’m sorry.” Peter takes your hands in his, thumb running circles at the back of both. “Tony has a safe house ready. He’s already made the calls needed so that you can keep up with your classes and not get any absence during the time it takes until we catch him.”

You bite your lip, the frown back on your face. “How long?” 

“I don’t know.” Peter’s hand comes up to cup your face. “I’m sorry, babe. Does it make it better that MJ and Ned will be there, too?” 

“Isn’t it suspicious that we all disappear around the same time?” 

A small smile forms on Peter’s face. “MJ’s already there, and Ned’s going up there two days after you.”

You press your lips together. “Can you visit?”

Even before Peter starts to shake his head, he knows you didn’t expect anything else. “I’m not allowed to know where it is.” 

---

Probably for the first time in your life, you completely lose yourself in school. Peter said there wouldn’t be a problem to help you keep up with your classes, but you’re not just keeping up, you’re ahead by almost a chapter. 

Time runs by so slowly, and if you’re not studying, you’re still with your nose buried in a book. You barely sleep. Just toss and turn, constantly waking up in a cold sweat. Your heart keeps hammering and your thoughts fly out to every place they shouldn’t go. 

MJ and Ned are only helpful when they drag you out of your room and force you to eat with them, force you to watch movies you don’t pay attention to, force you to interact and stop worrying so much because…

...Peter will be fine, right?

“He knows what he’s doing.” Ned tries for a reassuring smile, but you’re not sure he’s even convinced himself of that. “Or, not always, but he’s got Mr. Stark.”

You swallow the remnants of your wine glass. “Not helping,” you say as you place the glass back down on its coaster on the coffee table. “Really, guys, all I wish to get was some kind of message that he was alright, or… I don’t know…”

The bottle of wine rests on the rim of your glass as the red liquid flows out like a waterfall. Only the sounds of the drink sloshing against the sides of the glass and liquid hitting liquid, interrupts the silence that lies over the three of you like a blanket. Your eyes fall to MJ, the reasonable one, albeit at times pessimistic. 

She shrugs. “The threat was for us, though?” 

You nod, but squint at her with eyes full of skepticism. The wine glass is back in your hand, the wine’s cool touch on your lips. 

“Then he’s probably not in that much danger. Green Goblin threatened to hurt Spider-man’s loved ones, not Spider-man. Because he knew that would hurt Spider-man psychologically. Now he doesn’t have anyone to hurt, because we’re not there and Peter’s already hurt. In a way, he managed to do the harm he wanted to without doing anything but issue the threat.”

“I don’t think that makes this any better,” you say. “That means Peter’s hurting, I don’t want Peter to be hurting. He’s the one I’m worried about.”

“What? You’re not worried that some green monster’s gonna come here and eat us alive?” Ned shakes his head. “Shocking. But that would’ve been kinda cool, don’t you think?” 

You try to suppress a smile as you lightly hit Ned in the back of his head. His hand instantly goes up to touch the spot and a small ‘ow’ follows. “Thanks, though,” you eventually say. “I know I’m not that easy to be with currently, but you’re… thank you for being such good friends.”

MJ smiles. “I’m just thankful I’m not alone. If I had to get stuck with someone, at least I tolerate you guys.” 

“Thank. I tolerate you, too.” You roll your eyes, but at least the smile’s actually forming on your face now. The worry is still a feeling at the bottom of your gut, and the nerves are still running at high speed, but there’s an ease to it that wasn’t there earlier. 

---

Three months, one week, four days, eight hours and twenty-three minutes. 

That’s how long it is since you last saw Peter. That’s the exact amount of time that has passed since he said goodbye the day after he told you what was happening. 

And now, as the car pulls into the garage of the compound (the secret compound that you, as a civilian, aren’t supposed to know about), your heart pounds louder and faster than it has all that time you’ve been worrying about Peter. 

The thing is, you don’t actually know what pulled you out of the safe house. MJ and Ned only knocked on your door and told you Tony Stark was there, and that you were getting to go home. 

But you didn't get know anything else, something that is killing you as the door to the car opens. Ned, MJ, and you are led by Tony to a set of elevators. Inside, Tony presses a button with letters on it instead of numbers. The silence is deafening and everything inside of you is buzzing. Energy that surges through your body, adrenaline flowing through your veins, and both there for positive and negative assumptions alike. 

Finally, the elevator doors chime open. (And a relieved sigh relaxes you a little seeing that you’re not entering a medical wing). The doors open into an open space with a comfort area to one side and a table with chairs surrounding it to the other. And that may be the first thing you see, but a moment later you see who you’ve been waiting to see for so long. 

Peter rises to his feet, and if you didn’t know him so well you’d miss the look of pain that crosses his face, but you see it. Your feet run on their own accord, your arms flinging around him and hugging him tightly, whatever hurt him be damned because you haven’t seen him in so long.

“I’ve missed you so much,” you say and pull your head away to look at him, grip still tight in a fear of letting him go.  

“I’ve missed you, too.” He smiles, one hand coming up to cup your face, and you lean into the touch. “But right now, you’re holding onto me a little too tightly and uhm… can you loosen the grip?”

Your eyes widen and you smile as you loosen your grip. “I’m sorry.” 

Peter smiles. “It’s okay.” 

And you nod. “You’re okay, that’s what matters.” With another smile, you lightly press your lips to his. When you pull away, you hug him to you and leaning your head on his chest. You can hear his heartbeat; a steady rhythm that soothes tension in your body after all the worrying. 

After being away for so long, you don’t want to ever let go of him again.

permanent tags:  @devilbat��� @adefectivedetective​ @gamillian​ @he-is-chaotic-she-is-psychotic​ @heartislubbingdubbing​ @wiczer​ @chillcan​ @geeksareunique​ @fandom-imagines1​

[brynnmck]

 Tagged by @agirlnamedkeith, @pretty--thief, and @samirant, thank you! <333

What is the colour of your hairbrush? Mostly black, with a green ring on it.

Name a food you never eat: I have quite a few foods I can’t eat anymore thanks to some random health issues I developed a few years back (friends, aging is great from a mental/emotional perspective, Not Great from a physical perspective) but in terms of voluntary stuff, green peppers. I’ve outgrown a lot of my childhood food dislikes but that one is in my SOUL.

Are you typically too warm or too cold? Too cold, definitely.

What were you doing 45 minutes ago? I was in a boring meeting!

What’s your favourite candy bar?  Probably Snickers? I really like 100 Grand too, though. And Butterfinger. And Twix. And I want Claire Saffitz to make all of them for me.

Have you ever been to a professional sports game? I’ve been going to Major League baseball games since I was a kid (it was my dad’s favorite sport), and the past few years, I’ve been to 20-30 games a season. I usually go for my birthday, too, which is in a couple of weeks, and it’s just kinda sinking in that there will be no birthday baseball for me this year. :(

What was the last thing you said out loud? Just saying hi to my husband. 

What is your favourite ice cream? Coffee Heath Bar Crunch. I can’t have caffeine anymore so this summer I’m gonna try to make a decaf version for myself. (WHY IS ALMOST ALL COFFEE ICE CREAM CAFFEINATED. There are so many reasons people can’t have caffeine! Sigh.)

What was the last thing you had to drink? Water!

Do you like your wallet? Sure? It’s a nice blue and it holds my stuff.

What was the last thing you ate? Fruit and Greek yogurt for breakfast.

Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? I didn’t! I actually ordered a couple of soft bras from TomboyX on Monday, but nothing on the weekend.

What’s the last sporting event you watched? A replay of an old Mariners game a couple of nights ago. If we’re talking live sports, I watched about half of a Korean baseball league game a few nights back, which was delightful.

What is your favourite flavour of popcorn? Butter!

Who is the last person you sent a text message to? @ajoblotofjunk 

Ever go camping? Not in a long time. My husband has been getting the urge to go lately, though, so maybe we will!

Do you take vitamins? I take supplements due to the aforementioned health issues. And vitamin B.

Do you go to church every Sunday? Lol no. My mother is very Catholic and she brought us to 6 am Mass every weekday when I was a kid. It was well-intentioned (her dad had a pretty volatile temperament and she always felt safe at church, so she subconsciously wanted us to feel the same way) but it did not sell me on the experience! Heh.

Do you have a tan? I live in the Seattle area and it’s May, so... lol no. I’m also pretty pale so I don’t get that tan anyway, but. I usually get a little something going in the summer, enough to have tan lines anyway.

Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? Tough call, but I’m going with pizza.

Do you drink your soda through a straw? I don’t drink soda anymore (though I drink a LOT of carbonated water), but I’ll drink my drink through a straw if I get it at a fast-food place. Otherwise I don’t usually use one.

What colour socks do you usually wear? Most of my winter socks for work are black. Otherwise it’s a pretty random selection of colors.

Do you ever drive above the speed limit? Sure. Usually 5-10 miles over, rarely more (or less) than that.

What terrifies you? Climate change. Global pandemics. You know. Just generally suffering (both mine and other people’s).

Look to your left. What do you see? Through window of the room I’m sitting in: my neighbors’ house, and a cherry tree in their yard.

What chore do you hate most? Cleaning the bathrooms.

What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? The hot Australian woman who’s been on Gold Rush recently, or a dear fannish friend of mine I haven’t talked to in years who is actually from New Zealand and I KNOW IT’S VERY DIFFERENT but it’s close enough to make me think of her!

What’s your favourite soda? I used to drink a lot of Diet Mountain Dew. I really miss ginger beer, too. I love a good spicy ginger beer. Root beer too.

Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? Drive-thru all the way. Isn’t that part of the advantage of fast food?

What’s your favourite number? I don’t really have one!

Who’s the last person you talked to? My husband!

Favourite cut of beef? Boneless ribeye. I finally bought a propane grill a couple of years back and I have now learned to make a badass steak, if I say so myself.

Last song you listened to? Eve 6 - Inside Out. A few months ago I suddenly remembered that this song existed and so I bought it and now I have to listen to it at least twice every time it comes up, ha.

Last book you read? An as-yet-unpublished Rose Lerner novel, because I am very lucky! (It’s a wlw Gothic. SUCH A GOOD CONCEPT.)

Favourite day of the week? Saturday

Can you say the alphabet backwards? In this economy??? Idk, I could probably figure it out, but it would definitely be work.

How do you like your coffee? I love a caramel macchiato, especially iced so you get those weird globules of caramel coming up through the straw. But a nonfat decaf double latte with a little bit of some kind of syrup is my go-to these days--hot when it’s cold out, iced when it’s warm out.

Favourite pair of shoes? I have these 40s-ish heels that tie over your instep with a little bow and I love them. I also have some extremely cool red velvet with black cording peep-toe Louboutins that I bought off some discount site years ago, except I can’t wear them for long because they’re about a half size too small. But they’re SO PRETTY.

Time you normally get up? In isolation, I’m discovering that my natural sleep schedule is about 2 am - 10 am. But I have a daily meeting at 9:30, and I try to get my workout done before that, so I get up at 8-8:30ish. I am discovering through this meme that SO MANY of you are morning people! What is that like???

Sunrises or sunsets? I love sunrises but I am not remotely a morning person, so. I see a lot more sunsets, and I love them too!

How many blankets are on your bed? Just one duvet.

Describe your kitchen plates. We have some with blue perimeters and kind of a white/oatmeal middle that we inherited from my in-laws, and the ones we actually bought on purpose are white on top and either sage-y green or charcoal black on the bottom.

Describe your kitchen at the moment. Somewhat messy, or at least there are dishes to do. I made some pretty epic cauliflower mushroom risotto with shrimp last night, though, so it was for a good cause.

Do you have a favourite alcoholic drink? Perfect Manhattans with rye are my go-to, or a Quebecois, which is basically a perfect Manhattan with a little bit of maraschino liqueur added (and ideally a lemon twist, though we’re usually too lazy for those). In the summer, I’m getting really into gin these days: either gin and tonic, gin and some kind of citrus spiked seltzer, or a Last Word. I also really love a good craft beer, and sparkling wine too.

Do you play cards? Not really. We used to play a shit ton of gin rummy in high school, but I haven’t really played cards much since.

What colour is your car? Blue!

Do you know how to change a tire? Theoretically yes, though the one time I actually tried to do it myself, I had a hell of a time getting the lug nuts off. I was fortunately in my driveway at the time (good place for a flat tire!) and my neighbors kept coming by and offering to help, and I was like NO I WANNA DO IT. I think I did need help eventually, though. Stupid pneumatic tools at tire installation places!

Your favourite state? That rare, usually-brief phase of writing where everything seems to fit and flow and you’re a genius and you understand all the secrets of the cosmos. Also Washington.

Favourite job you’ve had? My current one. It’s not my dream job, but it pays well and I like my team and I get to learn new stuff fairly often and I can work from home in the midst of all this, so. I am very lucky!

How did you get your biggest scar? The summer after my freshman year of college, I was part of a summer stock theatre troupe, and we performed half the summer at my college, and half the summer in a very small town in eastern Oregon that had an outdoor stage. One of my entrances involved running over the grass to get to the stage, and one night the grass was wet, and my costume involved ballet slippers, and I slipped and fell onto the stage stairs in front of the whole audience. It hurt SO MUCH that I got very light-headed onstage while I was trying to get through the scene, lol. Anyway, my costume also involved harem pants that had elastic around the calf/ankle area, and I got a friction burn from those, which ended up scarring because the skin over your shins is very thin! (I also got a few massive bruises on my leg that didn’t go away for weeks, so eventually my mom nagged me into going to the doctor, who promptly started gently hinting to see if my boyfriend at the time was responsible for the injuries. Which was actually pretty cool of the doctor! But then I was like, lol no, trust me, a hundred people saw me bite it, this is 100% dumbass mistake.) And that’s my scar story.

Tagging, if you want to do it: @ajoblotofjunk, @snowymary, @halcyon-red, @it-may-be-dull-but-im-determined, @unadulteratedkr, and anyone else who feels like doing this!

[purplesurveys]

911

Do you know anyone named Walter? Not any real-life ones, but I do know of one Walter White. ;) What's your least favourite ice-cream flavour? Strawberry, mango, ube. Couldn’t pick just one. I don’t like chocolate too but I’d still eat a bowl of it if I was offered one. Did your last beverage contain caffeine? Nope. My next one will. What colour are your favourite shoes? All my favorite pairs are white. Do you have a friend named Alice? I don’t; I know of one though. One of my friends has had a crush on her co-worker named Alice for the longest time.

Are you missing anyone at the moment? Yeah. I don’t know how I managed to not see Gab for four months. I saw her three weeks ago and it feels like ages since then. Where is that person? She’s at home and we’re both getting really annoyed at not being able to spend time together. In your phone's contacts list, who is the first person listed under 'L'? Ahh you caught my phone being dead and me unwilling to charge it just yet, haha. I might edit this answer tonight once I’ve charged my phone, idk. How old is he/she?

What's your favourite Christina Aguilera song? She wasn’t the only one in the song but LADY MARMALADE is so good; it’s literally still a hit at bars/clubs in 2020. For her solo songs, I love Come on Over Baby. Did you get any friend requests on Facebook today? Nah but I got one yesterday; I know she’s a relative of my dad’s because all our mutual friends are from my dad’s side, but I honestly don’t know who she is or how we’re related. Still added her anyway. Who was the last person you said "sorry" to? Why? Gabie. I don’t really wanna get into it...she was in a bitchy mood and got mad over something she normally wouldn’t be angry about, so I just said sorry to get it over with because I wasn’t in the mood to argue. What's your least favourite song by your favourite artist? With Paramore I tend to skip Ain’t It Fun; with Beyoncé, I don’t like World Wide Woman. What colour is the soap in your bathroom? White. You're locked in a room with the person you fell the hardest for. Problems? No, I think we’ll both be delighted. What's the 6th song on your iTunes "Recently Played" list? The sixth album/playlist on Spotify is a lo-fi playlist Gabie curated. She shares her account with me so she must’ve played it while she was working. Name one of your favourite foods that starts with the letter M. Macarons. How does your musical taste differ from your parents'? My mom is stuck in the 80s and all her favorites are from that decade. She also likes love ballads, which I never enjoyed. I have no idea what my dad’s music taste is, or if he even has favorite artists or bands. Do you have anyone on your Facebook friends list that you've never met? Kind of. Most of them I bumped into either in high school or college, but I never MET met them. We just kept seeing each other and eventually knew each other by face and name. I certainly don’t add people who I don’t know at all. What's the surname of the last person you text messaged? Not giving that out. What was the last good news you heard? Some of my orgmates who have been delayed for a few years and stayed longer than expected in the university are finally graduating :) Let's test your memory. Where did your first ever kiss take place? On my bed on January 24th, 2015. What's your best friend's middle name? See my answer three questions back. When did you last have a deep conversation with the opposite sex? My best estimate would be about a month ago, with Andrew.  Who was the last person to comment on your Facebook status? That would be my kuya, which reminds me that I have to reply to him because so far it looks like I’ve ignored his comment HAHAHAHA thanks, survey How did you meet him/her? He’s my cousin, so he was literally present when I was brought home. How many vowels are there in your first name? One. Two if you count y. Is there anyone you used to be close to, but aren't anymore? Of course. That’s normal. I’d be very surprised if there’s anyone out there who’s been able to keep the same set of friends since kindergarten. Do you wish they were still part of your life? Not really, but I don’t dislike them. I just think that things like this happen for the best and for our individual growth. Who was the last green-eyed person you talked to? I don’t think I’ve done that before. If the person you miss turned up at your door now, how would you react? At how my hormones are doing rn, probably cry and throw my arms around her. Have you told anyone you love them today? I’ve told both my dogs.

[jamesmarlowe]

『ANTON THIEMKE ❙ CIS-MALE』 ⟿ looks like JAMES MARLOWE is here for HIS SENIOR year as a FINE ARTS student. He is 21 years old & known to be CLEVER, INVENTIVE, UNRELIABLE & EGOTISTICAL. They’re living in NOLAND, so if you’re there, watch out for them. ⬳ SLOTH. 25. EST. SHE/HER.

hi hello welcome 2 my twisted mind ☺️ marlowe is a character i’m still fine-tuning bc he’s brand-new, so this is unfortunately.... a bit of a mess.... and mostly made up on the spot.... c’est la vie!!

(a late addition but u can also peep his weheartit collection here 4 some vibes)

his government name is james marlowe but he only goes by marlowe & only introduces himself as marlowe like he’s madonna or sting....  most ppl who know him (apart from like close friends) probably don’t even know what his first name is. maybe he doesn’t have one!

hails from Appalachia, specifically a trailer park in a poor-as-dirt stretch of Virginia where he was born n raised, baby. he’s Appalachian white trash and not afraid to admit it. marlowe’s very casual about his upbringing and his dumpster fire of a family (no less than three relatives are currently incarcerated, one of which is his older brother who’s probably serving a minor sentence for whatever dumb shit Tim Riggins got got for in FNL or like, selling illegal fireworks out of his trunk :/ ). the only thing he’s a little self-conscious about is his twang which he’s mostly suppressed by now, but other than that, he’s got no shame in where he comes from bc lbr no authentic artist ever came from money anyway!

born sandwiched in the middle of five siblings, marlowe’s always been wild and creative and impulsive, a loud-mouthed kid with too much to say for his own good, prone 2 getting in trouble but learning absolutely nothing from it. it was his mission in life to be Different from all the other kids who grew up where he grew up, with the way he talked, dressed, acted, because he knew that he was destined for bigger n better things so it was just a matter of getting other ppl to believe it, & then seeing how far a little talent and a lot of charisma would take him >:)

from age 8 onwards, he told people he was an “artist” and that became his primary identity. when he was 16 he completed an independent sculpture project (called “Skyscraper”) where he constructed a 20-foot tower made out of junk collected from around the trailer park and then glued Barbies n other dolls all clawing over each other to get to the top, smack dab in the middle of Main Street and refused to take it down even when the local fire department showed up 2 threaten him with fines. it did eventually get taken down bc it was ‘structurally unsound’ and someone nearly got concussed by a falling mannequin head, but at least it got some attention from local newspapers and w/ that as the crown jewel in his portfolio, marlowe got into a few different art/liberal arts schools the following year. radcliffe was the only one who offered a partial scholarship and the east coast sounded nice n far from home, so anyways lets go ✈️ college 

FAST FORWARD its senior year babey and marlowe’s been making the most of his time here at radcliffe. he’s a fine arts major but specializes in mixed media sculptures (and probably is really shit at most of his other classes, like art theory where u actually have to read textbooks? still life drawing? boring. yawn. won’t do it.) his entire profile as an artist i’m cribbing from Rachel Harrison bc I saw her exhibition at the whitney a little while ago and her sculptures made me go ?????¿¿¿¿¿ which i think is exactly the kind of bizarre nonsense that marlowe is going for with his “art”. feast your eyes on these masterpieces. the joke of it all is that marlowe is the first to admit that his art isn’t like.... good. but his philosophy is that if people respond to it & praise it like it’s art, then by definition, it’s art. and if it gets him places (like it got him onto Cultured Magazine’s “30 Young Artists To Watch This Decade″ list), then yeehaw!

When he’s not busy creating new monstrosities, marlowe takes one fat nap per day (usually at a time when he has class) and is otherwise a very social creature who needs constant attention. he’s got a lot of friends and is always looking to make more, not in a #fake way but just as a person who genuinely likes being around people. he very quickly gets bored if left on his own, so he’s prone to following people around campus like a stray cat regardless of whether or not they tell him to shoo. he dorms at Noland but is almost always found in other houses, often crashing in other people’s rooms (needs to be close to his friends or He’ll Die), and he definitely frequents parties, bc marlowe never passes up an opportunity to drink other people’s booze and get a lil messy and Chaotic. he’s [jim halpert voice] not a slut, but who knows? he’s kinda a slut! he’s also definitely pulled another stunt similar to Skyscraper by taking over the quad for a guerrilla art installation with his sculptures (and without the school’s permission oops) which may be the basis for some connections if ppl know him from that particular exploit!!

in summary..... marlowe can be a bit up his own ass at times, but being around him is generally a Good Time bc he’s easy-going and friendly and always down for anything, always. litcherally zero impulse control so nothing gets in the way of a dumb idea that might potentially make for a good story. perhaps he’s not the most reliable person, so don’t expect a prompt text back if ur in a life or death situation, and he doesn’t care very much about anything, so ur setting urself up for disappointment if you do expect him to care about something (the fact that he’s never been in a long-term relationship... very telling). all he wants to do is just have! fun all the time! he’s trying to scam his way into the American Dream with his dumb art, so that he can live a good life and maybe get rich and famous and eventually party at Art Basel in Miami with Frank Ocean! is that really so much to ask!

appearance: marlowe’s very vain and a lot of thought goes into his appearance even when (especially when) it doesn’t look like he’s done anything but roll straight out of bed. all of his outfits are as outrageous as his sculptures are ugly. think mismatched prints and loud colors, silk shirts gaping open like he got tired after the first three buttons, a pawn’s shop worth of jewelry, weird dangly earrings w/ feathers or tiny charms, tinted yellow or pink sunglasses, sometimes a bandana around his neck, just for extra flavor. his hair always has to look perfectly tousled; u can catch him checking out his reflection in pretty much every mirrored surface. at least half the surface area of his body is covered in tattoos & he’ll suggest getting more during every drunken night out, which... is why he has so many by now!

connections: to be quite honest its 2 am and i feel all of my higher brain functions shutting down so i’m gonna make these very simple n straightforward, but we can always workshop!!!! pls feel free to message me even if none of these strike ur fancy :0)

peers in the arts - friends, acquaintances, rivals, probably some former group project members holding a grudge....

fellow party animals who don’t mind sharing when marlowe inevitably mooches off their alcohol and drugs :)

unlikely friends!!!!! it’d be fun to have a friendship dynamic with someone who’s very different from him!!

a roommate in Noland... possibly one he’s not on good terms w/... even tho marlowe hardly EVER sleeps in his own dorm room, he uses it as a storage locker for all his “found” art materials. i can imagine that living in that mess would try the limits of anyone’s sanity :)  

enemies - they can hate his whole Genius Artist shtick and they’d be valid :/

fellow insomniacs! marlowe is very much a night owl (regular naps during the day may be 2 blame but oh well) so he needs a fellow nocturnal to hit up the late-night McDonald’s drive thru with him and then lay on the grass lookin at the stars and contemplating life’s great mysteries while eating chicken mcnuggets 

exes - idk if u can even call them tht when his past “relationships” have all had a lifespan of six weeks or less, but hey there’s drama in that too!!

fwb - i don’t think marlowe’s the type 2 be juggling too many fwb/hook-ups at one time simply because That’s A Lot of Work. that being said... he never likes to sleep alone ;)