#ITS NOT EVEN SUBTEXT ANYMORE

[notebookpapers]

so we all agree they fucked in that Honda Odyssey right

[snoikie14]

How dare people say we're crazy for imagining Destiel for all those years,, Dean is Bi, Cas is gay

You can rip this truth from my cold dead hands

[ezralva]

You know seeing all those cute fanarts about Geto, Haibara, and Nanami cheering Gojo's fight with Sukuna from up above always makes me wanna shed a tear and also all those teacher!Geto au where Gojo always looks so happy teaching alongside him...and how all that now turn out to be like foreshadowing next chapter...like I'm really sad rn especially when he said he wished Suguru was there to motivate him before the fight...damn Gojo, no need to worry cz your Suguru is definitely cheering you on, you just didn't see it back there... and like, man, it's okay if you wanna rest now and join your Suguru, you've done so much and worked so hard...

Once again we are reminded how for Gojo, it always always comes back to his Suguru, no matter how many other of his friends and allies still there with him or recently passed away or even the fact that Suguru's body is literally still up and about and very much alive as the man who sealed him. Yet Gojo's heart and mind are still always on the man who, he of all ppl knows best, has died by his own two hands...for a year.

I mean seeing his face while he lies there and 'meets' all his late friends hurt af but at the same time I want him to rest...

It also throws back to when he said to Megumi about winning by dying is different than dying for winning (or sth like that) and how you'd always die alone no matter how many allies you got... Kinda wanna point out as well about that q&a where Gege said Gojo basically couldn't be killed...but that was years ago...so idk myb things have changed in their mind... Anyway who knows myb it's not definite yet...

[violentlydefending]

genuinely always so shocked to see mirei hate. like literally god forbid women do anything.

[many-gay-magpies]

neil what the fuck

[some-murmurings]

now im not saying that this was the most cathartic thread ive ever read

Your personal triggers and squicks do not get to determine what kind of art other people make.

People make shit. It's what we do. We make shit to explore, to inspire, to explain, to understand, but also to cope, to process, to educate, to warn, to go, "hey, wouldn't that be fucked up? Wild, right?"

Yes, sure, there are things that should be handled with care if they are used at all. But plenty more things are subjective. Some things are just not going to be to your tastes. So go find something that is to your tastes and stop worrying so much about what other people are doing and trying to dictate universal moral precepts about art based on your personal triggers and squicks.

I find possession stories super fucking triggering if I encounter them without warning, especially if they function as a sexual abuse metaphor. I'm not over here campaigning for every horror artist to stop writing possession stories because they make me feel shaky and dissociated. I just check Does The Dog Die before watching certain genres, and I have my husband or roommate preview anything I think might upset me so they can give me more detail. And if I genuinely don't think I can't handle it, I don't watch it. It's that simple.

[yeehaw-razor-dirt-man]

Its 2025 and im out here crying about Dexter vex

[murphysiblings]

when i think about the changes the DEH movie made to the story & all the important parts that it cut out i feel like punching drywall

[meowmeowfication]

holy shit theres no way theyre NOT gay

i mean the scene of them alone in the office together and then playing the lyrics "we might kiss/when we are alone/when nobody's watching" is INSANITY

the middle age yaoi doctors make me want to kay em es

[hideousocean]

Many people are noting that Nimona isn't very subtle about its message and themes (cue the rainbow breathe weapon). And you know what, I think it's awesome. We're used to thinking subtlety is good, and even queer people frequently agree that queer stories should be "well made" and "not too preachy". That's not wrong in itself, but here's the thing: after spending millennia as "the love that dare not speak its name", we desperately need stuff that isn't subtle, but loudly, blatantly, obnoxiously queer... AND well made, because these are not opposites. Subtlety for its own sake becomes just another closet. After realizing it, I won't be comfortable writing queer subtext anymore -- not until I see queer text become commonplace.

[xyywrites]

Subtext Through Sentence Structure in Writing

Ever noticed how a character’s true feelings can be hinted at without them saying a word? That’s the magic of sentence structure—a subtle tool to convey emotions, tension, and subtext in a way that feels natural. It’s all about how you arrange your words. Here’s how you can use it to give your writing extra depth:

1. Anaphora (Repetition for Emphasis)

Anaphora is the repetition of the same word or phrase at the beginning of successive clauses. It can create a rhythm, emphasize a point, or show a character’s emotional state. It's like a mantra or a sense of growing obsession in thought.

Example: "I can’t do this anymore. I can’t keep pretending. I can’t keep lying to myself."

Here, the repetition of “I can’t” highlights the character’s frustration, their internal conflict, and emotional breakdown. The more it repeats, the more you feel their emotional weight.

2. Asyndeton (Omitting Conjunctions for Speed or Chaos)

Asyndeton is when you deliberately leave out conjunctions (like and, or, but) to create a fast-paced, almost frantic effect. This can be great for moments of tension, confusion, or a character’s overwhelmed state.

Example: "She ran through the streets—pushing past crowds, dodging vendors, barely noticing the rain."

By skipping “and” and breaking up the flow, the reader feels the character’s urgency, the rush of the moment. It mimics the quickness of their thoughts and actions.

3. Choppy, Fractured Sentences for Internal Chaos

When a character is dealing with inner turmoil, sometimes their thoughts don’t flow smoothly. Fractured sentences—choppy, disjointed—can show their disarray or emotional breakdown.

Example: "Why did I do that? What was I thinking? No. No, I—I can’t—I can’t fix this."

This kind of sentence structure mimics the chaotic, fragmented thoughts of someone who’s in distress. The disconnection reflects their internal turmoil.

4. Polysyndeton (Overuse of Conjunctions for Overwhelming Effect)

Polysyndeton is when you overuse conjunctions like “and” or “but,” giving a sentence a heavier, more drawn-out feeling. It can show a character’s exhaustion, hesitation, or even their growing tension as they try to process a situation.

Example: "He wanted to scream, and cry, and punch something, and tear everything apart until it made sense."

The repeated use of “and” here conveys the overwhelming nature of the character’s feelings, as if everything is piling on top of each other, adding to the emotional overload.

5. Ellipsis for Unspoken Thoughts or Tension

Ellipses (the ...) can be used to indicate something unsaid—unfinished thoughts, unspoken tension, or the sense that something is being withheld. This subtle tool adds layers to your writing, letting the reader feel the weight of what’s not said.

Example: "She looked at him... but said nothing."

The silence here speaks volumes. It’s not just that she’s not speaking—it’s the unspoken tension between them that gives this line its emotional weight.

TL;DR:

Anaphora = Repeating for emphasis, building emotional weight.

Asyndeton = Omitting conjunctions to show speed, urgency, or chaos.

Choppy sentences = Fractured thoughts or emotional breakdowns.

Polysyndeton = Overwhelming feelings through too many conjunctions.

Ellipses = Showing subtext through what’s unsaid or withheld.

[indigovigilance]

A Nightingale Sang in 1941

This is my inaugural meta (yay!) Eventually I will learn how to add gifs and whatnot to make this more interesting but today, I give you a wall of text.

I need to give credit where credit is due to three existing metas that I’m drawing upon heavily here:

A speculative continuation of the 1941 story, which includes an almost-kiss while “A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” plays on the gramophone,

A behavioral analysis of Aziraphale during the S2E6 finale (will find ref later if possible)

A meta-analysis of the way in which “coffee” is used as a symbolic equivalent for liberty and freedom of choice, a running theme of this show (will find ref later if possible)

I’m going to expand upon meta #2 and #3 and explain why I think there is are very compelling reasons to believe that #1 will be canonized.

At the end of S1E6, an instrumental version of “A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” plays diegetically, but the lyrical version plays non-diegetically over the credits (we hear it but the protagonists don’t). So we the audience could plausibly say “that’s their song,” but as of the close of S1, we have no reason to believe that they know that it’s their song. Even Aziraphale’s S1E3 (1967) suggestion that they dine at the Ritz could be a reference that only he gets, or just a fancy restaurant suggestion.

So when I was watching S2E6 and Crowley said “no nightingales,” I was jarred. What does that even mean? We know it has something to do with dining at the Ritz, but what does it mean to them? The reference only works if they know it’s their song. But we’ve only ever seen them hear it together after the averted apocalypse; if this is the direct reference that Crowley is making, it leaves our 1967 reference contextless and twisting in the wind.

If we assume that there was a romantic story beat in 1941, wherein “A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square” (which, incidentally, was written in 1939 and saw the height of its popularity at the end of 1940, so timeline-wise it’s spot-on) became their song, then a lot of events get renewed interpretations through this lens, in a way that makes this story much more cohesive and the “no nightingales” comment even more soul-shattering than it already was.

Let’s presume that immediately after this became their song and just as they were discovering their romantic potential, they were forced back into hiding. Forever after, references to the song serve as a macro for “I’d like to pick up where we left off that night.”

The 1967 suggestion of “dining at the Ritz” now becomes a directly romantic suggestion. It also gives better context for “you go too fast for me.”

Actually going to the Ritz in 2019 is not simply a celebration or even a callback to 1967, it’s a callback to their almost-romance of 1941.

When Crowley says “no nightingales” in 2023, this isn’t to say “we’re not going to eat together at the Ritz anymore.” It’s saying that the romance that began that night, the precious, fragile romance, is over.

I’ll give you a moment to dry your eyes before we move on to metas #2 and #3.

In light that this is what has been going on - they know they want a romantic relationship but have gotten so used to hiding and denying it that they are more comfortable keeping the status quo static and quo-y then trying to achieve their ideal - a lot of S2 behavior can get a fresh view.

Crowley’s reaction to Nina isn’t a realization that he’s in love - he knew that already. You can only ask someone to run away with you so many times before you are forced to admit some things to yourself. No, he’s realizing that trying to hide it (which was justified by survival), hasn’t been working, but despite failing at being stealth nothing bad has happened. He’s realizing that it may finally be safe to show it.

Crowley’s confession, then, is not a revelation. It’s making the subtext text. He’s not telling Aziraphale anything he didn’t already know. He’s saying it now because he thinks he’s safe to do so. Pin in that.

Lots of people have lots of theories about Aziraphale’s motivations in the S2 finale, which can more or less be divided into 4 camps: the genuinely held belief, the coffee theory, the lie theory, and the mutual trick theory (some version of the body-switching at the end of S1). Let me start by saying that I love all the fans and all their theories and I find their analyses to be insightful. The genuinely held belief theory, while I believe it to be erroneous, has been incredibly conducive to so many wonderful conversations and I love being in a community that has those conversations. But I’m going to explain why I think the lie theory finds the most support in canon.

Re-watch the finale (when you feel like you can) from 35:18 to 36:19 and then from 40:45 to the end, paying very close attention to Aziraphale’s words and his eyes. Michael Sheen is telling us a LOT with his eyes, and in the back half of the finale scene, with pacing.

For 60 seconds of footage, this setup is doing a lot of work. If Neil Gaiman wasn’t doing enough to beat us over the head with how evil the Metatron is, that glare at Crowley at the end with the non-diegetic ominous horns should convey the message. But again, focusing on Aziraphale. He initially refuses to talk to the Metatron; he’s made his position quite clear. There is no hint of regret or wavering; this is not someone who’s aching to return to the fold. The Metatron ignores his refusal and functionally forces him to accept a “cup of coffee.” The coffee isn’t spiked, but it is a metaphor. It is symbolic of choice. The Metatron is going to force Aziraphale to make a choice. Meta #3 does a great job of exploring the idea that a choice between anything and death is never really a choice. Hang onto that thought.

Notice I had you start up again 3 seconds before “The Conversation.” That’s because it’s important to note where the Metatron is right now. He is across the street, staring straight in through those giant windows to where our protagonists are about to have The Conversation. He is watching.

When Aziraphale returns, Crowley begins his “let me talk” riff. Aziraphale ought to be interested in what Crowley has to say, since the preamble is pretty compelling. You’ll notice that Aziraphale quickly turns to the window and back, through which he (but not we) can see the Metatron standing there, watching them. Aziraphale is then doing his best to get Crowley to STFU without raising the suspicion of the Metatron, eventually having to cut him off.

Because unfortunately, Crowley’s entire impetus for speaking up now is that it’s safe to do so. Only Aziraphale knows that they are in very real danger (or at least, Crowley is, but I’ll come back to that).

You might take something from the fact that he’s shaking his head while talking about “incredibly good news,” and seems to self-censor his criticism of Metatron (or more specifically, he takes ownership of any criticism of the Metatron, censoring out Crowley’s role in that, with the emphasis on I in “I might have misjudged him”).

Notice in the flashback that he begins the conversation reasonably relaxed. The Metatron also says a series of things about him that not only are false, but everyone, including the Metatron and Crowley, know are false: Aziraphale is not a leader, he’s a defector; he’s not honest, he lies all the time, in fact this entire season revolved around his one huge lie of hiding Gabriel. Not only does the justification not make sense coming from Metatron, but it shouldn’t make sense that Aziraphale would accept these reasons and it shouldn’t make sense to Crowley either. So is Aziraphale including these details in his recounting to Crowley so that he will get suspicious and figure out the jig? Maybe. Let’s continue.

Immediately upon being offered the job of Supreme Archangel, Aziraphale says “but I don’t want to go back to Heaven.” This is direct evidence against the genuinely held belief theory. If returning to Heaven and making a difference was a genuine motivation, we would have gotten a different response at this moment. But then we get something more.

“Where would I get my coffee?”

This is a beautiful response for a number of reasons; coffee should be trivial compared to the opportunity to be a Supreme Archangel, so it serves to highlight just how little interest Aziraphale has in returning. Taken at face value, it’s the Aziraphale equivalent of “not even at gunpoint.” But remember that coffee is a metaphor for liberty in this universe and this season. So what Aziraphale just said, in the language of Neil Gaiman metaphors, is:

I don’t want to go back to Heaven, I would rather have free will.

What does the Metatron do next?

He brings up Crowley.

Watch Aziraphale’s eyes before and after the mention of Crowley. He goes from confused to eye-flicking panic in the space of two syllables. Aziraphale already understands that his “no” is not being accepted, and that bringing Crowley into it can only possibly serve as a threat.

So the coffee, the choice, is a false choice. No one ever orders death. The Metatron has forced Aziraphale into a situation that looks an awful lot like a choice (it comes in a blue cup, after all) but it isn’t.

We definitely have some reliable narrator problems here. I’m going to presume for purposes of analysis that these cut-outs are accurate but incomplete, and that a more explicit threat about what would happen to Crowley if Aziraphale did not return to Heaven was made.

If we assume that Aziraphale has been made aware of a threat and is trying to hide that from Crowley, the rest of this scene reads very differently. Aziraphale cannot say, “you are in danger but you will be safe if you swear your allegiance to Heaven” or “I have to go, no matter what, and the only way we can be together is if you come with me,” but nonetheless he now has to convince Crowley to do the one thing he ought to know Crowley definitely doesn’t want to do all through subtext. Which we’ve spent an entire season establishing that they can’t communicate well when they are allowed to use their words. Disastrously, this is not a magic trick that Aziraphale can make work when it counts. Their failure to practice good communication means that, right now, when it counts most, they are not going to pull it off.

We see that Aziraphale is very hopeful that Crowley will pick up on his cues and play along. Obviously, he doesn’t.

If the whole riff about Hell being bad guys and Heaven being the side of truth and light is taken as genuine, it discards a massive amount of character development that we’ve witnessed in Job, Edinburgh, etc. (again, to all the genuine belief subscribers, I think it’s a compelling argument but it simply doesn’t account for the evidence). So if it’s not genuine, why say it? Again, to alert Crowley that something is Off, because Crowley should know that Aziraphale doesn’t actually believe that. They saved humanity from Heaven and Hell. They hid Gabriel from Heaven and Hell. Crowley knows that Aziraphale knows that Heaven and Hell are just two sides of the same coin. Notice again that Aziraphale glances out the window while he’s talking up Heaven; he knows the Metatron is watching, he can’t not defend the position of Heaven. I think it’s also worth noting that Aziraphale forcefully glances and gestures off to Crowley’s left (away from the window) when talking about Hell, and then turns his head to Crowley’s right (towards the window) to try to get him to realize that a representative of Heaven is literally standing right over there, just look out the window please dumbass!

When Crowley is asking Aziraphale if he said no, and we see the back of Aziraphale’s head, again we can see him turn his head to glance out the window. This is also when he changes strategies, and admits that Heaven could use a little reform. Because now there’s a problem almost as big as getting caught, which is that he won’t be able to get Crowley to go with him.

Which unfortunately makes the next part of this so much more heartbreaking. Because when Crowley begins his speech about being a team, Aziraphale wants to hear it. He can’t bring himself to shut down Crowley again, even though it could get them both in massive trouble. Notice that he glances out the window again during this, and the look of panic on his face. He begins to shake his head when Crowley mentions that Heaven and Hell are toxic; this can be taken a lot of ways but I’ll argue for the interpretation that he’s trying to get Crowley to STFU and stop saying shit that could get him destroyed.

After Crowley puts on his sunglasses we are in the “back half” and Sheen is doing a lot with phrasing here, specifically pregnant pauses.

“Come with me… to Heaven!”

“We can be together… as angels!”

Based on the pacing decision I am thoroughly convinced that the first half of each of these statements is intended to be the message to Crowley and the second half is always a qualifying statement to satisfy the Metatron.

Unfortunately, these pregnant pauses are completely backfiring in their effect on Crowley. The sentiment gives him hope and the qualifying statement crushes it again immediately. He is being taken on a horrible emotional rollercoaster with these declarations which are only further amping up his instinct to run away.

The only truly genuine, unaldulterated statement I think we get from Aziraphale is

“I need you!”

When it becomes clear to Aziraphale that there’s been an irreparable breakdown of communication between them and the subtext is not getting across, he says:

“I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you.”

He means this literally. Crowley has not understood that Aziraphale is offering him protection from whatever threat the Metatron has made.

Which makes this part extra-devastating and also absolutely in keeping with a major running theme of this season.

“I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do.”

Your understanding and my understanding are different understandings.

Crowley views the offer to return to Heaven through the lens of his trauma. He understands what life in Heaven would be like. But he doesn’t understand that Aziraphale is offering him protection.

But Aziraphale just heard Crowley say that he understood everything, and he’s still going to leave. There might be a little suspense of disbelief here to believe that Aziraphale really interpreted the statement this way, but we know that Aziraphale isn’t always the brightest battery-operated candle in the drawer. So under the assumption that Crowley did understand him and is still rejecting the offer, rejecting him—

“Well, then there’s nothing more to say.”

Please pay very close attention to Aziraphale’s body language for the next part. He’s active, agitated, turning side to side, arms swinging. This is a very fidgety angel.

“No nightingales.”

Aziraphale is now completely still. He’s feeling that feeling. You know it. The one where your entire body is getting sucked into the pit of your stomach. The aching paralysis.

This is their song, the one that began their romance in 1941, the secret code for all other attempts at flirtation. Crowley has walked out on him before, Aziraphale has been stubborn and obstinate before. But they always came back together, sometimes with an apology dance or other rituals that belonged solely to them.

But now the song is over.

By saying this, Crowley has broken up with Aziraphale. We can see in Aziraphale’s sudden transition from fidgety to paralysis that he has understood it this way.

Then he turns away from the window so that the Metatron won’t see him cry.

The kiss was heart-wrenching already. But we’re not done with this analysis.

During the kiss, Aziraphale has a choice to make between two very compelling bad choices. This is the Job dilemma. But worse.

If he doesn’t kiss Crowley back, he will let Crowley think that he doesn’t love him. He will have missed out on this (maybe/probably their first kiss?) and regret it forever.

If he does kiss Crowley back, in full view of the Metatron, they are in deep trouble.

He seems to do his best to split the difference. I would even go so far to say that the awkward arm waving is Aziraphale acting for the Metatron’s benefit, to try to portray that he doesn’t want this even though he absolutely does (just not like this). The anguish when they break the kiss is absolutely real, and the first thing he does is glance out the window. Through all this he has remained painfully aware of their spectator.

He wants to say I love you. He mouths it. He breathes it.

But the Metatron is watching.

He can’t tell Crowley I love you. So he has to say the only other thing that has always unequivocally meant “I love you” when he said it to Crowley. He has to hope that Crowley understands him now, even though he never has before.

Spoiler alert: Crowley doesn’t.

My forgiveness and your forgiveness are not the same forgiveness.

One more point against the genuine belief fans (I love you): if the offer to let Crowley back in is what changed his mind, then Crowley declining removes that incentive. Aziraphale should/would have consequently retreated to his last stated position of “I don’t want to go back to Heaven, where would I get my Crowley—I mean, coffee?” [post-publication nod to @theonevoice for a great little meta] It simply doesn’t hold up to scrutiny.

I think a lot of fans were already making these assumptions about the use of the nightingale song so this meta may not feel revelatory, however, it isn’t canon (yet), and I’m sure I’ll find company that agree that canonization of this connection would strengthen a lot of these story points, as evidenced by how it is already assumed by many fans.

If you made it to the end - omg thank you! Please leave a note and tell me your thoughts!

Bonus: somebody already made the song connection here

~~~

if you liked this, you may also like:

Book of Life and what it means for Crowley

The Erasure of Human!Metatron

Baraqiel and Azazel

~~~

Recommended related (lie theory) metas by other people:

making the subtext text by @theonevoice

Aziraphale's Decision Matrix by @yowlthinks

Nothing Lasts Forever: META by @phoen1xr0se

[yuutawe]

TAKE A BITE INTO MY HEART﹕yuta okkotsu. . .

when death strikes down those you love most, a desperate binding vow proves to be the salvation.

ꖛ warnings!‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎(overall) nsfw + angst with happy ending(?)‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎major character death !‎ blood and death (mentions + slightly described) + a bit of gore (hearts) ! cannibalism ! ‎‎‎‎‎‎‎yandere appeals (?) ! mutual obsession ! jjk manga spoilers for the end of the shinjuku battle arc ! i basically threw every rule from the universe out of the window (this is not how binding vows work and im nearly sure of it, lol).

ꖛ about. * reader is gender-neutral. no anatomy specified + they/them pronouns and genderless nicknames.

ꖛ inspired by‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎so, i went back to watching hannibal. blame the homoerotic subtext in the cannibalistic series for this idea.

ꖛ author's note * repost because i can't see my post in the tags (sob). originally posted this in nov 28th.

ꖛ word count ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎1.410 (1.4k)

‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎[ENGLISH IS NOT MY FIRST LANGUAGE.‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎ ‎NOT PROOFREAD!]

how do you undo what can never be undone? a person's comfort when someone dies is usually knowing that it was inevitable. this fate awaits us all in the end. soon, in a day or ninety years, we too will be hidden in large wooden boxes, burned and turned to ash, or left to rot in the darkest, most forgotten corner of the world. but death changes people. its touch is not meant for those who remain alive, but it changes them all the same.

as you changed when yuta died.

the flowers seem too alive when they arrive arranged in bouquets, tied with ribbons that are too vibrant. that color bothers your eyes. or maybe he seems too colorless. it's uncomfortable.

that body on the stretcher is uncomfortable. it's unfair and uncertain. when ieiri and the others left the room ── give them a moment of privacy. you know how important it is ──, whispering behind your back as if you were an abandoned stray animal. a homeless animal, with no place in the world. pitiful. like a creature abandoned on the side of a dirty road. everyone stops to look at the tragedy, but not to help. and how they mourn. they cry more than you.

poor things. they were so happy.

swear i don't know how it happened. one minute he was fine, and the next...

i didn't think he wouldn't make it. i didn't expect this.

i can barely imagine how they must be feeling. imagine seeing someone you love die in front of you, like this.

the sound of metal being punched takes you out of your thoughts. the idea of ​​people saying this now, with you right there with his dead body in front of you, just infuriates you so much that you punched the metal tray without even realizing it. simple as that. anger took over your muscles, and several sterilized tools were thrown on the floor. everything so fast. how can something happen so fast?

how did it all happen so fast?

he was fine. he said he was going to be fine. damn it, yuta promised he was going to stay. that he needed to fight, needed to help. your role was to stay here and give support to miss ieiri.

“asshole.” you can hear yourself mumble, your voice choked with tears. “you promised.”

when you touch his hand, searching for a familiar comfort, you find only an empty shell. normally, his long fingers would gently curl to hold yours. those warm hands would hold yours and yuta’s sweet voice would murmur it’s going to be okay, my love. we’ll make it, we always do.

lying son of a bitch. that’s what you want to scream, as the words mix with please, wake up. wake up and look at me. come back to me.

his body is so cold. not cold in yuta’s way ── warm hands and cold body, but cold like death. cold because the blood has stopped running through his veins, icy because his muscles don't move or contract anymore, his organs don't work.

just a few minutes. it's still surprisingly cool for a fresh body, but he's cold in a way that almost burns you. your aching heart can’t take this sight, no.

your body bends, and your lips touch his icy forehead. those closed eyes, those blue and depressed eyes need to open again. it's the only thing that's right. a dark whisper runs through your mind. he could come back, couldn't he? so many sorcerers have already cheated death. why did her scythe need to fall right on your boyfriend?

it wouldn't be like that. not if you're really here to change the course of history. a living and perfect heart beats in your chest — his, static and dead, is still red. it's still possible. it will be messy and completely crazy, but who's going to stop you?

who would try to execute you both? without the higher-ups, the sky's the limit and the new jujutsu society rises from the rubble of the old. and what golden age doesn't deserve its own champion? may he rise from the ashes and become the new champion of a sick society: recovering from the rot caused by the corruption of the old jurisdiction, yuta will overcome death and return to his place, by your side.

only by your side.

the blood is sticky, gooey. the bright red is so grotesque against yuta's pale skin that you wonder if perhaps god created blood to convince humans to kill less. it didn't work.

as the incision is made in his chest, you quickly put your fingers inside his body. a little searching, and with more effort, you hit his heart. great. with some difficulty, you cut a piece and brings it up to your mouth.

gulp. your swallowing is like the ringing of the death bell.

his blood stains your index and middle fingers — and greedily, you raise them to your lips and stain them with red. it's like lipstick. there's a certain romanticism in that.

the price to pay is not a debt that will be collected immediately. this could backfire very quickly, perhaps in a way that no one can stop. but if this gives him back to you—

the doorknob lowers, and someone grumbles behind the door. there's not much time. you don't have any more time. hey, did you lock the door? whoever is speaking, their voices seem like background noise as you lean in to kiss his cold lips.

may you share a life, may you share gifts and curses again. pure, mutual love overcomes every kind of mortal wound and lacerating incision.

you can almost feel a deep discouragement ── no answer. it didn't work? why? do you have to take a life to give another? it would make sense. bam. bam. open the door, they say. scared of what you might do to yourself.

a hand reaches up and grabs the back of your head, pushing you down once more. and yuta leans up, his lips wrapping around your bloody ones eagerly.

the salty tears run down your cheeks, and your hands let go of the scalpel to cup his face in your hands. it’s almost animalistic, desperate, as pure love invades you both.

he leans back, breathing heavily. oh, he is breathing. yuta okkotsu has returned from the dead thanks to you.

“what is going on— i can’t— my head hurts.”

the pain that hits you right after is almost unbearable. it's like being torn in half and then put back together in a completely different way.

he holds you, still trying to shoo away the ringing in his ears. “love— love, what’s wrong?” yuta asks, grabbing your hand to settle you. to push the pain away from your beating heart. 

the heart you two now share. two halves of your heart, shared to pump life through your bodies. you’re weakened, but he is alive. it was worth the price.

the door is broken down with a bang, but you can't make yourself care. your arms wrap around what used to be a corpse, but now is back to being your sweet, lovely boyfriend. he hugs your waist, his fingers grabbing at the flesh as if he wants to make sure you’re real. this is real.

“you’re alive, baby.” you sob, and he gently kisses your tears away. “it’s okay. you’re okay.”

and when the others enter the medical bay, all they see is yuta, who was dead less than a minute ago. he has a new scar on his chest, a vertical cut. the scalpel that was used to help you with the process has long been forgotten, thrown on the floor.

your chin rest at the top of his head, and it feels like you can finally breathe after drowning in grief for cold hours. — years, it’s what it felt like. he nuzzles into your warmth, stealing some for his own body.

his blood is flowing again, but he's still a little pale and the temperature is freezing in the medical bay. he rests his head against your shoulder, watching all the shocked and confused reactions from everyone else.

it's like walking straight into a sacrilege, something impossible, something that should never have happened. the breakdown of the natural order happened here, in this room. and yuta is alive.

alive, and staring at them with cold blue eyes for interrupting your moment.

© made by spiralryomen on tumblr. do not copy, repost, translate my works in this or any other site — inspirations allowed with credits.

[ladyinbl00d]

nat headcanons that i have created because i am so emotionally attached to her ♡

*notes

bold = script

bold w/ red = important or highlighting a detail

indented = script subtext

parentheses = (my thoughts)

its mostly precrash because i LOVE thinking about precrash nat :3

“basic” headcanons.

is bisexual (yes. idgaf. im right.)

was relatively good at school but didnt go to college because of how expensive it would be. (and plus seeing her situations its obvious her and her family didnt have a ton of money compared to the rest of the team so.)

(judging by her tone & the script’s subtext when talking to kevyn about nirvana during precrash: “i thought you didnt even like nirvana anymore?”) she liked nirvana but prefers other bands while kevyn was the one who really got into them (“theyre all right. its just- ever since they left sub pop theyve gotten so mainstream.”) and got nat into them because of him. (“its not their fault people love them.”)

—> her & kevyn totally watched them on mtv unplugged though. (“i guess i liked them better when they were just ours, you know?” she nods; yeah she gets that.) (for my own personal date counting, nirvana’s unplugged was november 18th, 1993 so thats what kevyn couldve been referring to when them going mainstream) (even though nirvana did get their break through smells like teen spirit which came out august 27th, 1991 on the radio and september 10th, 1991 it was released as the lead single from nevermind)

thrifts most of her clothing & cassettes.

has her license but prefers getting rides from other people. (i see it unlikely that she wouldve waited until being an adult to get it.)

has ran away from “home” a couple times to see if her mom (and dad) gave a shit. (newsflash they didnt)

the night her dad died & the days after headcanons.

the night her dad died was the night she first bleached her hair as an attempt to drown out the reflection him when she looked in the mirror.

—> she first tried alcohol that same night by stealing some of his. (mostly unsure... somewhere in that timeline… she was confirmed to be 14 when it happened because of the script so im willing to bet it was sometime after that.)

skipped a lot of school after that day but eventually went back to realize it was a good escape from home and gult she felt.

unintentionally picked up a lot of his body language and sometimes the way he spoke which frustrated vera.

she hallucinated him a lot when looking in the mirror, when she was alone, and occasionally in public. (id like to think thats why she was confused when she saw misty in episode 1, yes i know she was high and drunk but that adds to why she was confused) (in my opinion)

being in the presence of guns or even holding a gun trigger her memory of that day. (pretty much canon)

gets high and drunk to numb out the pain. (duh.)

playlist ive made for her: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5zrT6q6sCllToP8JG7QpHj?si=KU9YrjxsS5yGYvyAnlZOXQ&pi=xij_GDeOT2GZU

thank u for reading!!!! im probably gonna make more so lmk if u want a part two when i do so!!

[eddiegettingshot]

despite this just being a stupid tv show something that is actually baffling and genuinely concerning to me is the rampant anti-intellectualism and serious pushback against thinking critically about what we're consuming. any sort of negative response, criticism, or even expressed desire to see something different is written off as entitlement. wondering at the writers' intentions or wishing they'd gone about something a different way or disagreeing with them or thinking about a story differently from its creators is being hostile and demanding. don't consider subtext or symbolism or themes or really anything other than what's being put right in front of you because that's delusional. the characters are just characters and the writing is just writing and the show is perfect the way it is because the product is what its makers wanted it to be and as the audience you're supposed to just sit and bask in it without having any real opinion other than "yay! love it! thank you!" like can we get real please. what is even going on anymore

[reason-with-the-underdog]

kaveh's voicelines aren't even subtle about his loneliness

kaveh's voiceline: "haha if you're not me and you dont share my trade, i wouldnt expect you to understand. mmm… it'd be nice to meet someone who did understand, though"

kaveh's sketchbook entry about mehrak: "more than anything, i hope it really can understand what I'm saying"

and then one of his hangout routes is about how even if you can't be understood, companionship is just as valuable

…the takeaway being kaveh might never be understood by the masses despite how he longs to belong to the crowd (chara story 5), but maybe he can have a companion

more fun lines:

"You're not… making fun of me, are you? I've gotten so used to sarcasm that I can't tell what's genuinely a compliment anymore."

:') kaveh...

(also this is why sarcasm sucks for actual communication! this is a PSA from your local ND who doesn't always parse sarcasm well)

"it's best that we go and join him for dinner. sigh That means I'll owe him yet another meal now…"

🥲 he'll get there one day.

the way that he immediately pivots to reassuring traveller in his voiceline about his troubles like "whoops didnt mean to bring the mood down, srsly dont worry about it!!"

^ that is a man who keeps accidentally trauma dumping in public and feels incredibly bad about it

his voiceline about "You might unlock something that can't be put away again" sounds like kaveh's talking about his & alhaitham's fight after all, who else does he truly know as a person?

and then "even if all my hopes and dreams are built on pain and suffering" 🥲🥲

kaveh's so unfamiliar and uncomfortable with the concept of someone being worried about his wellbeing (tbf alhaitham does not phrase himself nicely)

the way that i went from "hehe kaveh cant find a way to politely reject a gift" to "o right kaveh thinks that no one will ever understand him and that he's such a burden on others that it's prob for the best to never be understood anyways"....

its not even subtext he actually says it

sometimes i think about how lonely and alienated kaveh must have felt, probably ever since his father's death...

and how resigned he is to being unknowable, yet unable to see that he also pushes away others (him holding scores and assuming that compliments must be jokes, etc)