#ITS BEEN LIKE THREE? FOUR? YEARS
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im NEVER gonna forget shy baby jimin on his bday vlive all thanks to jeongguk… NEVER
AND NEITHER WILL I!!!!!!!! every time i think about how he like tucked his head into his hands and looked down and got all shy because jeongguk is coming army GOD!!!!! INSANE!!!!!!!!!!!
#how could he do that to us#also i was watching kookmin compilation videos on youtube (as one does) and saw rose bowl again and IM STILL SCREAMING ABT IT#ITS BEEN LIKE THREE? FOUR? YEARS#WHAT WAS THE REASON!!!!!!!!!!!
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yay! I drew these quite literally three years ago. dragonheart!milo and raihan! a knight on a doomed dragon hunt being lifted out of his station by a small village medicine man. together they become magic lawyers and overthrow the government
the main details in these do survive into the iterations I’ve drawn (instead of these actual designs I spent time to make el oh el): the “leaf” diamond quilt/gambeson and the plaited coattail for milo, the “atypical” weapons, long coat, and large number of scattered fake gold trims and accessories for raihan. I think I lost raihan the hat and added a cape for milo further down the line because like this their general silhouettes are too similar for my liking lol
#pokemon#swsh#applinshipping#dragonheart AU#gym leader raihan#gym leader milo#leon is the puppet king in this one (I never made a design for him lol. lmao) (its not about him!!!!) (it is just a tiny bit#sonia actually disappeared out to sea like just the year before raihan got sent off too. and the shows up where raihan and milo are later on#as usual the everything between those three are messy in a way that makes every one of them embarrassed to bring it up lmao#if u remember one of the october pieces I did last year. the applinshipping one. yeap thats from this AU too#lmao. also remembering the swordsman AU. in every AU where I bring up a king you can TELL I cant WAIT to get rid of that guy#(its usually leon)#anyways it's not about him this is about raihan and milo!!! iirc everyone in the village knows milo is Something. bc he has literally not#aged at all for four generations#he's like doing his therapy away from the dragon hierarchy out here and raihan crash lands nearby#laughs this is so hallmark movie romance I just realized. except the city girl is trying to#extract her family from the palace before stealing the declaration of independence#oh yeah the AU is named that Specifically because the 'artifact' the whole plot runs around is supposedly a 'calcified' heart of a dragon#and the magic lawyer part is so raihan will seize the right to the throne by haha. winning a living dragon's heart instead#I'm actually surprised I remember this much abt this AU lmao it's literally been three years! I don't even remember what Im#supposed to do tomorrow#it's gettign a USB stick isnt it. Im doin a canadian horror triple feature with the senpai#I gotta remember that. well I remember This so. maybe there's a chance#man there are actually a number of applinshipping things I wanna draw... theyre my Fuckin BoyS#well! there's this at least. have a good night lads! I'll have cake soon#it's time to put cinnamon in things.
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this post on pinterest has somehow made me start thinking about a comedy human au,, all the bots are siblings, ages are fucked, all the walters live in one big house,, the bots r all teenagers (imagine having six teenagers jc). their parents are iris and peter i. they have two adult siblings, ii and iii. mark, wanda and iv are their nephews and niece. peter i has an oc sibling that isn't around anymore but is V's parent, and VI is his son (the bot's cousin).
i dont think the original inspiration post fits in at all but its funny so im not removing it amen
anyways. ages i think would be like,,
II & III in their early thirties
V in his early thirties but younger than the rest of em.
rabbit and spine are 18 and twins
hmm my zer0 headcanon is that he was built first but powered on later so maybe hes like 19 but adopted/a half sibling that moved in slightly later? idk hes 17 or 19
next i think is hatchworth he is 15 and draws on a moustache every morning and tells everyone its real (jon is convinced)
jon is um uh 12 little boy 🫵
upgrade is 9
mark is 11
wanda is 9 (woah two 9 year old girls. yhey tell everyone they're twins)
realising that i cant keep the age difference the same as canon because iv would be -1. oops. hes a little baby
vi is also a little baby.
sorry i lied they're not all teenagers lawl. also realised zer0 couldn't be a half sibling because they have two way older siblings too oops
yeah this au makes no sense but i do think its funny. sitcom au. highschool au.
they all go by their canon robot names, its unclear whether they were named that or if they're nicknames or a mix of both. five is older than four because of a mistake on his birth certificate, he should have been four but they all just kinda went with it and named the next one four
i think rabbit would come out to her [younger] siblings at 13 and come out/start transitioning at 14, partially in reference to the year she transitioned in canon and partially because i was that old when i came out teehee. i think maybe she always knew and expressed it though, she just didnt know trans people existed and didn't have the terminology for it
do they have all-through schools in the us? like elementary all the way to high school? we do in the uk but idk about over there. if they do then that could be funny i think
#saymbles#au where#spg au#long post#spg#steam powered giraffe#cba to do individual tags for literally everyone#idk where the beciles fit in#maybe just an overplayed soccer mom type rivalry between thaddeus and peter i that translates to all thr kids also disliking each other#whats the name of the becile that got incinerated by rabbit in 1950#i think maybe he bullied rabbit really bad one time and two and three went full on big brother mode to like beat him up or something#nobody actually dies but there may have been one or four major hospital trips#i reckon guy and norman werent involved bc they're both wandas age so literal like 4 year olds at the time#maybe in the future when that lot are teenagers theres a romeo and juliet style romance with a love triangle and its all very dramatic#in the way only teen romance can be#also i think maybe the becile bots could be there#as a treat#similar ages to their counterparts#slightly younger though i think#spg teen au
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about 30 hours into veilguard and while I have an essay worth of my problems w the game and how this is absolutely not ten year's worth of developing I do want to say what I do like. the maps (visuals/progression/exploration), combat, and the companions (only five of them. neve and taash annoy me and I would absolutely not recruit them if this game didn't force you to)... overall it's all right on its own but it's no dragon age game.
#i dont want to pass final judgement until i finish the main story but#trying so hard to not talk about everything i hate about this game#my main thing is how your choices do not matter. the three dialogue choices are essentially the same thing#absolutely no roleplay and no replay value aside from what. making a new character to look at and who to romance#which is fine i suppose but they should have said that this game is more linear instead of lying#dragon age 2 had more choices and that game was shit out in less than a year . embarrassing lol#i haven't really played origins properly so when i say this i mean the main four companions#but in every dragon age game ive liked all the companions. there were only very very few i didn't care for#but neve and taash bore me to death and i hate that you have to be nice to them especially when theyre being unfair#also i don't mean to be obnoxious when i say its no dragon age game . i genuinely felt like i was playing a ubisoft game#the dragon age identity has been stripped since the original writers were cut off thats just a fact#can i even say im disappointed when i never even had expectations to begin w#in the end the cons outweigh the pros and this game failed miserably to be a dragon age successor or whatever. its a complete sanitization#this franchise has always been a mess#dragon age veilguard#datv spoilers#bioware critical#six speaks
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#hey boss#u uh- u said i was working sun n wed- can i have more consistent days so i have days to block out for interviews?#.#uve been forewarned#ok so its four months into my gap year and HOLY SHIT JOB SEARCHING IS SO FRUSTRATING#so im working as a clerk at this law firm mon and wed (only 8 hours total tho)#n i THOT i had my reatil job in the bag but then boss goes “yea im really sorry but i cant give u three days - only sundays and weds��#so i was like great ok i need another job thats cool ill just bliock out sundays and weds for potential employers#THEN on sat boss texts n goes “ahhh i dont need u till next week- also can u switch ur wed to fri”. ??????? MA'AM#so i go#she says sorry kid i dont WHICH IS FINE I APPRICIATE THE COMMUNICATION#so i have an interview the next day at a coffee shop for a time THE MANAGER OFFERED#i show up after having pit my day aside for this noon interview#i walk in employees go “uh ho manager stepped out”#she camnt come back for the rest of the day AND doesnt apologize in her email- just “unfourntallyyyy i didnt have time to check my email”#MAAM YOU SEND THE INVITE#whatever#luckily last friday i was invited to this job fair by like four diff locations in san fran n was immeditaly hired#(first trial shift tmr yay!)#but the commute is gonna be KILLER#however im hopeful n i love coffee so yay#also my pet sitting is taking off ive got two sits booked for october#which is suprising bc im also traveling for half the month#manchester edenbrough st andrews milan lake como babayyyyyyy#also this thursday im heading to chicago and maine for a wedding (yay go love!) and to tenessee for another wedding in jan#so now ive got law firm retail associate barista dog sitter n i just KNOW when the holidays roll around n both retail jobs will be wack ill#be floored#but. ahem anywats good things frustrating thinsg stressful things but GOD am i glad i took this gap year#oh yea and ive been hiking tones! lands end trail#tilden park
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I wanted to make a visual for Soley's parents so I did
Left: Árni, right: Salka
A little lore I'm strongly considering under the cut
The two of them decided very young that they were very much in love and resolved to leave the forest in order to live their lives together. They travelled a little, and as both had a fondness for the sea they naturally found themselves gravitating towards sailing jobs. Whithin a few decades, they had amassed enough wealth to acquire a ship of their own, and set about establishing their business sailing passengers and cargo between otherwise-hard-to-reach locations, eventually finding their rhythm on a route that more or less spanned the globe - they would sail from Othard, to Vylbrand, and then on to Tural, and then back again, picking up passengers, crew, and cargo (and dropping off old ones) along the way. By the time Soley was born the Torunns and their ship, the Aalto, were one of the foremost names in the business.
They'd pledged their lives to one another young, though, long before either had really learned who the other was going to become, and the stress of parenthood and the natural isolation of a seafaring life wore on them over time. Salka in particular became bitter, and angry, mostly towards her partner. Her family and crewmates saw a side of her that nobody on land ever did; cold, controlling, and sometimes violent. This energy was never directed towards her son, who only learned the truth of his mother once he was old enough to understand how one-sided his parents' "fights" were. Árni, for his part, became ever more distant from those around him, especially his son - who so resembled the woman he'd once loved, and now hated - and devoted himself entirely and wholeheartedly to the maintenance of the ship as a means of creating time by himself.
The pair of them were lost at sea, presumably having gone down with the ship, shortly before the Calamity. Soley had stayed in Tuliyollal at the recommendation of a family friend and, upon hearing the news of his family's disappearance, found that he wasn't especially sad about the loss of his emotionally unavailable father and selfish, domineering mother. He still wonders, sometimes, whether that makes him a terrible person.
#c: soley#hc: soley#scrns: soley#(not really but they're his parents)#ffxiv gpose#if any lore fiends are gonna come for me about the crossing between tural and eorzea being an unusual one#it still can be. in my head it takes like three or four months to sail between the two and the Aalto was also incoroporating Othard#into its regular route#they were probably doing one major crossing a year and then the return trip the next year#especially taking into account regular dry-docking of the ship for maintenance etc#anyway that said and put aside#the lore is still forming i just thought soley should have some major parental trauma :)#i'm still trying to decide whether i want them to have been caught up in ketenramm & gjj's shenanigans a bit#for that sweet sweet fucked up childhood-friends-to-lovers solaal arc#but i don't know whether i can be bothered sorting the timeline out that far in my head#i hate to crunch numbers and what are years if not numbers
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when did you first realise you hosted a system?
sometime in 2020 if I remember correctly? had been experiencing very obvious osdd symptoms for YEAAARS but had no idea what it was before meeting some friends who did. learned a bit about it and went okay interesting! and then a few months later went oh fuuuuck.
#IT WAS REALLY FUNNY I DONT KNOW HOW I DIDNT REALISE PREVIOUSLY#like hey man.#you had full blown conversations with another presence inside your head every day on the way home from school for MULTIPLE YEARS#this presence didnt agree with me on everything either like.#dude arguing with someone else inside your own mind is NOT average 11 yo behaviour#anyway ya its been like three or four years. wow#also had an 'imaginary friend' named ivy at the age of like 7 who was mean to me and just. never wanted to play or anything#ask tag#and like. my interests and attitudes towards relationships and even the way I spoke changed almost daily#inchresting stuff ^_^#I DO WANT TO ADD that disorders involving being a system are VERY COVERT. you might not even HAVE symptoms#I was just. very special or something
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to pass the time quickly at work im just sitting here thinking about lu/ciel from elsword and how cool they are to play
#i havent played elsword in. oh my its been three or maybe even four years#good lord#yea i just like luciel so much. infinite demon death barrage#chris noises#elsword
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got a CANDLE that smells GOOD and also a few OTHER THINGS that ive been thinking about getting FOR A WHILE
#i also cleaned my bathroom and called the pharmacy and my doctor so i can pick up my meds this week#i ordered some stuff on amazon that ive been thinking about for a million#i literally never order on amazon either like i havent ordered something in three or four years???#but idk im soooo insane when it comes to buying things like its genuinely a problem#i have to tell someone usually my mom about every purchase i make so she can tell me that it's okay that i bought them#its kind of like catholic confession i need either reassurance or penance#i call my mom and list all the things i have bought or am thinking about buying and she has to sit there while i justify like buying#shampoo AND conditioner when im only out of conditioner and im changing my haircare cos my bleach has grown out#or like idk a CANDLE#txt
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[extreme frustration] I wanna move back to the city
#nyc#personal#vent post#I don't actually LIKE living in suburbia but it's been my life for like. Uh. most of it#I lived in Queens for five years as a kid and did four years in Manhattan (and a semester in Tokyo) for college#and spending three months in Novi Beograd recently just reminded me how much better my life is when I'm in a WALKABLE CITY#[frustration]#(also this doesn't count as NYC but does count as tempting mockery of it: I've spent a decade on LI which means two hours to nyc)#So I've basically been either in the city or in its suburban metro area for all except infancy (20 months)#and six years in Colorado for middle/high school#other than that. NYC and LI#and I *miss it*#*I need a good job*
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some ppl that work in healthcare... really shouldn't work in healthcare.
(heavy heavy tw for medical situations & death/child death in tags, do not read if you're sensitive to it... I'll delete this later just had to vent)
#ceci speaks#nonsims#delete later#was just thinking about all the terrible things ive heard while being a hcw#from fellow hcw#and reporting it never helped because it was all shitheads all the way up#then i see more assholes going into that work and its like#really#ive experienced so much death since covid started and truth be told#it messed me up pretty badly and changed me as a person#im not the same person i was four years ago#and i wonder#would it affect you the way it affected me#would you change and grow some empathy if you had to see that many people suffer and die#even with some of them being terrible people it still hits you somehow#you think youre tough and youre hot shit when youre in school#and a couple years later youre not even blinking when youre trying to get blood out of a dead three month old#but when you go home you hyperfixate on the fact that it could be you or anyone you know at any time#i remember the christmas i watched three people code and die the same day#and the baby that already had rigor in their little feet bc theyd been dead in the crib way before they were even brought in#im not even a nurse im in lab for gods sake#but lab and rad dont escape this shit either#and i think if youre already a person with low empathy#the trauma must turn you into some of the people i worked with that just hated everyone they came into contact with#being cruel to patients or discriminating against them#why even go into that work if youre that kind of person#and i dont mean hcw have to be angels#its a difficult and grueling line of work that is underpaid and understaffed#but how hard is it to not be fucking evil#dont become a hcw if youre a discrimatory evil fucking piece of shit is what im saying
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I gravitate towards jobs and such in which I make decisions, and prefer to live alone which comes with many decisions, and then do creative hobbies that require me to make so many decisions, and I thought "Huh, decisions are hard, what would a nice day without decisions look like?" And then I realized I just meticulously planned out a whole day of no decisions by just making the decisions beforehand.
#im so tired of decisions#rn im pretty new at my job so not too many decisions but still aome stuff i have to do independently#but my last job was so many decisions. i coordinated so much and if i did it wrong evryone hated me#and before that i was a shift lead#and for the last four years at summer camp ive been an area director#and this year i applied for an office position which is even hugher than area director#and im trying to move out of my parents house which comes with so many decisions#why do i keep doing this to myself#i like leadership and independence too fucking much and then im burnt out on it#and i would love just one day in which i didnt have to make any decisions#unfortunately i know myself and i know that someone else would not make the right decisions#so i want to make the decisions beforehand#and then someone else just executes the decisions for me. if that makes sense#like i want to tell someone 'tomorrow we will wake up at 9am and go get coffee. i want aan iced mocha#after that we'll go to target and get a quick lunch at qdoba. one hour after lunch i would like an iced caramel coffee#i would like to drink this coffee while we go on a walk along the lake#then id like to go home and knit for two hours. you may do something in the same space but it has to be quiet and non-distracting#then we will have such a late dinner. pizza unless you are willing to cook one of the three things i am always okay with#then i will peruse my phone until midnight. then i will sleep#i want to lay that all out for someone snd then they facilitate it#like they just know 'okay its 9am get up we're going for coffee.' 'alright its midnight put down your phone for sleeps'#all damn day they just do the decisions for me. even though i already made them so i know they were made right#idk if that makes sense. im just so tired#i was laying in bed before sleeping and decided to plan my perfect day of no decisions#and realized that it was not decision-free because i had just made every decision#did i mention how tired i am
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genuinely do not get the point of replying to someone's gifset with 'I hate these characters. I stopped watching after they were introduced.' sorry you feel that way, but I don't actually give a shit. now get off my fucking post.
#do people just...not remember the phrase 'if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all?' because like...#now I just feel like shit.#and like...its happened three or four times in the past couple of months. where people will leave a reply on one of my gifsets that's not#negative towards the gifset itself its negative about the character or the episode or the series or the actor#and it's like...well okay you're allowed to not like it but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to like it yknow? but also I worked hard on i#and whilst you're not directly being negative about the work I put in#you are saying its less valid because it's characters that you don't like#it's also always been hidden blogs#which means that I get the email notification of the reply but I can't actually go to the blog itself and block them to stop it happening#I try not to let it get to me but honestly I'm really fucking tired of the userbase of this site right now#it's the constant stream of 'we've got to reblog gifmakers and artists otherwise they'll stop posting' posts being reblogged and then#gifsets that have a reblog to like ratio of 1:4#and it's been getting bad for the past five years or so#but now its getting to a point where it does really fucking bother me#because what the fuck is the fucking point#and like...I get it. I'm not great at reblogging every single gifset I see. Not everything I like is something I'm interested in.#but there comes a point where you start thinking... where are all these people that like this gifset but not enough to reblog it coming fro
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i don't know what it is about august/september (right around my birthday specifically) that always evokes some major change in my life. every year without fail, something big always happens, and i always get the annual, inescapable urge to completely turn my life around.
#within the last four years that big change has been packing up and moving to a different state (three times. once against my will OTL)#this year its packing and moving into a better apartment#but not only that but moving in with a roommate that will take some of the financial burden off of my shoulders#and then with that new extra income every month i will finally be able to afford the things i really want#and will make my life significantly easier and better#ya know. like actually having furniture in my apartment. or food.#or being able to start streaming again. or making time for my hobbies again. or having cute clothes i actually like to wear.#i just want to stop surviving and actually start living#for once in...about a decade now#shouting into the void
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#delete later#i have three medical appointments in the work day in the next three weeks#one on Thursday then two mid/late January and i know that its good bc i need these appointments but i get so#anxious that ppl ay work are mad at me for having so many#im also scared about thirsdays one bc its for my ankle and hand pain and ironically the hand is way better and the ankle is also#more stable. something clicked again a couple days ago and fixed the pain in half of ky foot. no idea what happened there but#the click itself hirt like a bitch which is new. most of my pain doesnt start with a click and most clicks are painless#so fun#im just in a permanent state of being afraid i wont be taken seriously. my physio wanted a scan on my foot so om gonna#relay that but like idk what theyre gonna say. also if they do want to swnd me for a scan that's gpnna be ANOTHER appointment#so fuck me i guess. at the very leasy its not like severe psin any more so they wont send me to a and e for an x ray like they did#with my hip that one time. that would fucking suck to explain tp my manager#hey julia im fine but ive been sent ro rhe hospital for a scan so i guess ill be back when im back?#fuck me im anxious. and i hace so much apprenticeship work tp do i want to scream#also was distracted by my aching hands bc often they just ache abd successfully triggered myself so bow time to play what#is actual acge and what is remembered ache oh joy#one of the other appointments is gender clinic appointment abd im hoping to get referred for top surgery now ive been on t#for 9 months. waiting list gonna be like four fucking years but debating saving like mad abd going private bc jesus Christ#i cant bind bc of sensory problems and constantly aching ribs and last time i taped i ripped chunks of skin off so kinda#think i shouldn't do that again but like it sucks. not as bad now that my voice is dropping abd shit but still not fun#we'll see!
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I’ve always hated how media needs to be “palatable.” I think it’s annoying because people and situations irl aren’t always “palatable” either. Hell, more often than not, real people don’t fit the narratives touted by media, and that creates unrealistic and often misleading expectations.
#personal#this is mostly in trailer to a lot of HB criticisms#but it applies to basically every fandom I’ve been in this past four years#which is basically DSMP and Batfam#some others but those three’s fandoms are the biggest offenders#like the creators and the stories themselves aren’t even trying to be Palatable#which is why I like them#but their fandoms always seem to try to make#everything more palatable and sanitized or shit#it’s weird af#like#a lot of fandom is embracing the weird and non-mainstream aspects#but somehow Weird also has its own expectations for palatability#otherwise it’s Problematic(tm)#people are complicated!#they fuck up!#they’re cruel and nasty#they don’t always lead with kindness and they may expect the worse from others#they’re not going to fit the picture perfect model you want them to fit#and that’s good because that’s what makes them compelling!#if you don’t like it don’t read it#or watch it#not everything needs to exemplify moral purity
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