#IT WAS SO GOOD AND EXISTENTIAL
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good afternoon, good evening, and good night
#i watched the truman show for the first time today and AHHH#IT WAS SO GOOD AND EXISTENTIAL#anyways i knew i had to redraw this frame#so i f1shified it👍#please enjoy#my art#splatoon#acht mizuta#dedf1sh#the truman show
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I simply could NOT resist, okay?
I SHIP IT! I DON’T CARE! I SHIP IT :D
#main sponsors of your panic attacks and existential crisises#you’re welcome ehehe#they both are like#‘damn they’re so weird good thing I’m the only normal one in here’#let’s generate some DREAD together#we’re going to therapy with these ones#anxiety x fear#fear x anxiety#inside out#inside out 2#inside out fanart#inside out anxiety#inside out fear#my art#fanart
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It's interesting (if often frustrating) to see the renewed Orc Discourse after the last few episodes of ROP. I've seen arguments that orcs have to be personifications of evil rather than people as such or else the ethics of our heroes' approach to them becomes much more fraught. Tolkien's work, as written, seems an odd choice to me for not wrangling with difficult questions, and of course, more diehard fans are going to immediately bring up Shagrat and Gorbag.
If you haven't read LOTR recently, Shagrat and Gorbag are two orcs who briefly have a conversation about how they're being screwed over by Sauron but have no other real options, about their opinions of mistakes that have been made, that they think Sauron himself has made one, but it's not safe to discuss because Sauron has spies in their own ranks. They reminisce about better times when they had more freedom and fantasize about a future when they can go elsewhere and set up a small-scale banditry operation rather than being involved in this huge-scale war. Eventually, however, they end up turning on each other.
Basically any time that someone brings up the "humanity" of this conversation, someone else will point out that they're still bad people. They're not at all guilty about what they're part of. They just resent the dangers to themselves, the pressure from above, failures of competence, the surveillance they're under, and their lack of realistic alternative options. The dream of another life mentioned in the conversation is still one of preying on innocent people, just on a much smaller and more immediate scale, etc.
I think this misses the reason it keeps getting brought up, though. The point is not that Shagrat and Gorbag are good people. The point is that they are people.
There's something very normal and recognizable about their resentment of their superiors, their fears of reprisal and betrayal that ultimately are realized, their dislike of this kind of industrial war machine that erases their individual work and contributions, the tinge of wistfulness in their hope of escape into a different kind of life. Their dialect is deliberately "common"—and there's a lot more to say about that and the fact that it's another commoner, Sam, who outwits them—but one of the main effects is to make them sound familiar and ordinary. And it's interesting that one of the points they specifically raise is that they're not going to get better treatment from "the good guys" so they can't defect, either.
This is self-interested, yes, but it's not the self-interest of some mystical being or spirit or whatnot, but of people.
Tolkien's later remarks tend to back this up. He said that female orcs do exist, but are rarely seen in the story because the characters only interact with the all-male warrior class of orcs. Whatever female orcs "do," it isn't going to war. Maybe they do a lot of the agricultural work that is apparently happening in distant parts of Mordor, maybe they are chiefly responsible for young orcs, maybe both and/or something else, we don't know. But we know they're out there and we know that they reproduce sexually and we know that they're not part of the orcish warrior class.
Regardless of all the problems with this, the idea that orcs have a gender-restricted warrior class at all and we're just not seeing any of their other classes because of where the story is set doesn't sound like automatons of evil. It sounds like an actual culture of people that we only see along the fringes.
And this whole matter of "but if they're people, we have to think about ethics, so they can't be people" is a weird circular argument that cannot account for what's in LOTR or for much of what Tolkien said afterwards. Yes, he struggled with The Problem of Orcs and how to reconcile it with his world building and his ethical system, but "maybe they're not people" is ultimately not a workable solution as far as LOTR goes and can't even account for much of the later evolution of his ideas, including explicit statements in his letters.
And in the end, the real response that comes to mind to that circular argument is "maybe you should think about ethics more."
#i had a whole 'nother tangent that i split off into a separate draft#but i've been thinking about why the 'but shagrat and gorbag are still BAD people' thing seems so inane and missing the point#but yeah. i feel like people desperately want to find some justification in tolkien (and elsewhere) for the idea#that doing something wrong to a person will become doing something right if you can find someone who 'deserves it'#and that literally anything can be justified if someone has been defined as a valid target (i.e. less than a person)#(you see this a lot in the whole twitter main character of the day thing - the idea that the problem is directing the firehose#against the wrong person by mistake rather than the firehose itself)#but it's super weird for a novel built on a metaphor about how using the tools of evil for a good end or against existential enemies#is fundamentally corrupting and only further props up what it's meant to oppose#and i mean... the character most like tolkien literally says he could not morally justify lying to an orc and rejects the ring#it's not exactly a deeply buried theme of the book#anghraine babbles#long post#anghraine rants#legendarium fanwank#legendarium blogging#shagrat#gorbag#tv: lotr#jrr tolkien
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Mental Health Tip! Don't skip meals lest you be fighting demons
#Big Hero 6#BH6#Hiro Hamada#au stuff#uhhhh#cw existential dread#I guess? Not really the exact emotion expressed in this specific instance but it is the overall issue#something something Hiro survivors guilt he keeps avoiding because that's a whole nastier can of worms than standard grief#“I'm moving on from Tadashi's death so I'm almost good!” he says meanwhile the EVERYTHING ELSE is still waiting to be unpacked#Cus like fun fact about grief caused by loss bet money that grief is not going to be the only thing you gotta work on healing#humans brains are really funky about death especially when it happens spontaneously when you least expect it#Anyway reminder that self care and mental health is not linear there are days you think you're good and then you Find Out#but that's okay#so yeah this was supposed to be a quick warm up doodle for another drawing but I ended up messing around with it and now its a thing#I did find a new way of sketching I think I like so we'll see how it goes#been busting out the solid 3px pen I used to used back in 2018 when I started drawing art for the series that's been fun#god bless tags man great for yappers
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my little pony lawlight. thoughts?
light (unicorn) is a late blooming blank flank who only gets his cutie mark after he becomes kira and then has to hide it from everyone so he gets a fake cutie mark made up (notebook and pen to symbolise being really smart 😊) which he has to meticulously reapply every week or so when it fades. he is still committing real murders even though he is a pretty pony. equestria is rotten.
L (earth pony) has been sent to ponyville by princess celestia to investigate the disturbing pony murders, and hopefully make some friends along the way! 🥰 he doesn't. he (pony) does move in with light (also pony) allegedly to get light's scholarly help with stopping pony kira but mostly because he suspects light of being pony kira. also kira keeps being foiled accidentally by pinkie pie's random hijinks mostly because she's always delivering sweets to L pony.
oh wait also light pony's name is Light Turner because he turns things to the light! 🥰🌞 and his voice actor is nat wolff. from netflix. that whole plot with nightmare moon and also everything else in the show still happens btw L and light pony just have their own shit going on in the background and also ponies keep dying. i hope this helps
#asks#death note#mlp#there's something really funny to me about light being a prodigy pony but he just doesnt get his mark for ages#everyones like but youre so good at everything whats wrong with you#pony light is like (suffering a debilitating existential and depressive episode in his late teens) i used to wonder what friendship could b
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a good animated show must have at least 4 of the following:
- gay
- existentialism/nihilism
- morally grey lead characters
- horrendously depressing themes/messages
- psychedelic weird shit that highlights the absurdity of life
i don’t make the rules (i do make the rules pls recommend me shows—i’ll put the ones i’ve watched in the tags, feel free to add any you think of)
#bojack horseman#rick and morty#the midnight gospel#carol and the end of the world#fiona and cake#hazbin hotel#harley quinn#helluva boss#dead end paranormal park#bee and puppycat lazy in space#tuca and bertie#i’ve watched south park but i very much don’t need recomendations based on that specifically lmao#watched that shit for the cultural impact + the 1 in 100 times it makes a good point + tweek and craig lmao#also bc bom (musical) is a spin of mine so i was like welp rules of spin say you have to consume all media related to it no matter what#put it down was a good fucking episode though and for no reason like it just goes so hard#i relate to the pc babies and josh the marxist amazon package#yeet my deet#i want existential crisis shows#bojack horseman is my favourite show ever like it perfected every genre even the ones it isn’t in lol
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long hair marla long hair marla long hair marla lo
#fight club#fight club 1999#artists on tumblr#illustration#marla singer#she's my comfort character ok#I'm getting her face features better I feel so good#actually I felt kinda shitty all day#existential dread caught my ass again#me when I sleep only 3 hours#man what the fuck was I thinking back in elementary school when I initiated the blank nights sesh#I want to sleep so badly but my body doesn't want to#I just wanna have silly dreams let me be#anyways#drawing marla calms me down everytime#I love her the courteous love way#martyryo#won't be much active aside from posting art also
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Kirby deals with existential crisis and Bandana is a good friend
#kirby#kots#kirby of the stars#kirby fanart#hoshi no kirby#king dedede#bandana waddle dee#gooey#i like the fact that gooey is canonically Kirby's roomie and we never see him therr#i don't think even Kirby knows where he goes#he's like a wild cat you let live in your house but still manages to go out and returns when it wants#did you know gooey means everything to me#everyone's pal gooey#enough about gooey let's talk trauma#Kirby's existential crisis is my favorite subtextual overall narrative from the kirby novels#it's so good how Kirby is always a bit uncomfortable every time they find someone who looks like them#and no one makes them feel worse than void#i think Kirby understood more about void than we give them credit for#and if you ask me why does Kirby have nightmares despite being inside of Dreamland and around the fountain of dreams#the answer is idk#anyway bandana is really perceptive about it#marx is an asshole as always#i wish Kirby's fear and inadequacy could be explored more#they're only hinted at by the novels#but i know Kirby saw themselves in Galacta Knight#the novels confirmed Galacta used the allies sparkler when defeating void termina and the sparkler represents something objectively pure#so my favorite hc is that Kirby was born after the heroes of yore defeated void and star allies draws parallels to that giving you og Kirby#Kirby defeated void and got friends Galacta got imprisoned for eternity#i wonder if Galacta went through the same identity crisis Kirby went through but Galacta sealed with it worse#anyway nothing bad will happen to Kirby after all they have tons of friends to rely on
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I think finding yourself getting life advice from quark in his PJs in the middle of the night (and desperately needing it) is how you officially know you've hit rock bottom
+ just us girls together at the sleepover right. anyway get your life together bitch you're scaring the profit margins
#when garak talks in asit about how everything gets defined through relationship to something else he was thinking about Them#(no he wasn't he was having unholy thoughts about julian bashir. but you see what I'm getting at)#star trek#star trek ds9#ds9#odo#quark#I'm not sure this is quarkodo in my heart or if they simply share a connection deeper than what can be defined that way.#an existential bond.#quark is so good in this ep. 'yeah yeah you're a cold unfeeling logic machine of justice. can we cuddle now'#god the way kira smiles in this ep tho. I get it odo I get it you're not wrong
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i think a lot about how early-series, demigods are referred to pretty equally as "demigods," "half-bloods," and "godlings," - the last used particularly by gods at demigods - but after that "godlings" is almost exclusively used to refer to minor gods.
something something i am literally always chewing on the concept of the line between immortals/demigods/monsters/etc being thinner than it appears
#pjo#riordanverse#we should bring this back i want more ambiguity between demigods and immortals#and where they stand between mortals and immortals#ESPECIALLY with the TOA worldbuilding of ''oh yeah inverse of immortals fading - if enough people believe hard enough it becomes true''#and people canonically leveraging that to become immortal through that means#like WHAT that is FASCINATING WORLDBUILDING#and is potentially really cool for how the gods function#but also SO MUCH EXISTENTIAL HORROR POTENTIAL ON THE DEMIGOD END#jason and percy getting idolized so much they literally start to become warped by other people's perceptions of them...#jason being accidentally immortalized because almost everyone who knows him puts him on such a pedestal#AND INVERSE TOO. demigods who are so looked down upon they LITERALLY begin to be warped into monsters#tbh we just generally need more of modern demigods being turned into monsters#like how many myths are there of mortals and heroes being turned into monsters and animals#wheres that for demigods. its gotta happen sometimes. especially since we know other curses are frequent enough#also. how much we're told the greeks interact directly with the olympians (field trips to solstice meetings etc etc)#and how willing the gods seem to be to curse demigods/mortals#heck Mr D is constantly threatening to turn people into dolphins. he's gotta have made good on that at least once
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There is only one thing I thought of after seeing The Fudge:
(The Greedy from Raggedy Ann and Andy: A Musical Adventure)
#the amazing digital circus#the episode was so good but the existential dread almost killed me lol#raggedy ann#raggedy andy#raggedydoll#raggedy ann and andy#a musical adventure#ann#andy#the fudge#pomni#tadc pomni#tadc jax#tadc ragatha#jax#jax the amazing digital circus#the amazing digital circus ragatha#kinger#kinger tadc#kinger the amazing digital circus#tadc gangle#the amazing digital circus gangle#gangle#tadc zooble#the amazing digital circus zooble#zooble#bubble#tadc caine#the amazing digital circus caine#the greedy
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SEVERANCE ✦
#beep boop you want fries with that#in stars and time#isat spoilers#2hats spoilers#loop#siffrin#<- hes very tiny.#idk i just wanted to draw an angry loop and it devolved into this#the composition and everything isnt verygood but i had fun making it so whatever#making bad art is good for the soul 👍👍👍👍👍#once again. happy anniversary to the game that gave me a wonderfully refreshing and soul searching existential crisis.#<- my all time favorite thing for a video game to do to me#this is actually a crop the original image has an even larger amount of negative space. i just wanted to make sif look small.#but it probably makes the comp look like shit. though like i said. making bad art is good for teh soul so idgaf too much#weh.
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approaching my birthday today with this in mind.
#my friend baked me cookies for my gift so all is good so far#saw my crush as well 😌#the existential crisis is gonna hit soon just wait until it’s 8pm
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Asagiri and Harukawa could not have delivered a scarier Halloween chapter if they tried because what the fuck was this—
#bungou stray dogs#bsd 120#bsd spoilers#bro i was already chuckling nervously with Fyodor so casually breaking the fourth wall and HOLDING THE PANEL IN HIS HAND#while essentially referencing BOOK CHARACTERS AND THE READERS (LOOKING RIGHT AT US!!!!!)#AND THEN SEEING THE TITLE OF THE CHAPTER BE /AN ACTUAL PANEL/ AND THE LAST PANEL NO LESS#MAKING ME FUCKING SCROLL BACK TO THE START ONLY TO REALIZE THE TITLE NEVER ACTUALLY SHOWED UP AT THE START LIKE NORMAL#when i tell you that put the fear of god in me. oh my god. ohm y god-#legit shivers down my spine. looking out my window...... fyodor if you're there..........#thanks asagiri i didn't need an existential crisis tonight it's fine!!! hahaha i'm good!!!! *SCREAMS*#bros we are literally on the cusp of this shit going full bore meta i'm not even joking anymore. asagiri is COOKING and i am SCARED!!!!!!#in a good way but still!!!!! aaaaAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH#what else. oh yeah akutagawa died again ig lol that happened.
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“What if I did have feelings for you? I have spent so long trying to feel less, trying to be the kind of man society expects me to be. And for a moment, I thought I had succeeded. But these past few weeks have been full of confounding feelings. Feelings like a total inability to stop thinking about you — about that kiss. Feelings like dreaming of you when I’m asleep. And, in fact, preferring sleep because that is where I might find you. A feeling that is like torture, but one which I cannot, will not, do not want to give up.” (Bridgerton, Colin)
#I'm sorry i'm having another existential crisis with this gorgeous confession it's the most perfect#Luke Newton was so good in this scene holy fuck#bridgerton#polin#luke newton#colin bridgerton#nicola coughlan#penelope featherington#colin x penelope
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hihihi
have eepy kiwi sniper and happy engie !
Jsjsjsjsjs
How I’m feeling rn:
#tf2 art#tf2 fanart#tf2 medic#tf2 sniper#team fortress 2#kiwi sniper#tf2#doodle#art dump#life so good rn#I’m def not having an existential crisis#art
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