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yeah-alright-brill · 1 year ago

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Life on mars!!! (The TV show not the song!)

Life on mars is a british crime drama from 2006. Initially set in 2003, it follows detective Sam Tyler, a 'modern' police officer who wakes up in 1973 following a car accident. Is he mad? In a coma? Or really back in time? This show CONSUMED while I was watching it. Like dreaming about it, constantly reference it, crying at the finale consumed. Brainrot of the year for sure.

So in answer to your questions:

My favourite character is the one and only Sam Tyler, The Character Of All Time. He's cringe yet based, the most sensible one yet also the most unhinged. hes also definitely has poor little meow meow energy. He can flip from cool and collected to crying and shaking and John Simm absolutely delivers in the role. You asked about whether it includes debates on reality and morality and yes!!! YES like that is the core of Life on Mars. Behind the tense action, engaging mysteries, hilarious dialogue, imersive set and costume design and great acting that is what LoM is all about!! Like is he in a coma? Back in time? Suffering from a break from reality? Trapped inside a 70s' cop show? (Oh yeah important detail LoM is a parody of 70s British cop shows and as someone who's into media history that's fun but also you don't have to be super familiar with the genre to enjoy it though). Ahh god I really want to properly get into it but that would be spoilers!! Let me just say the ending was simpulatiosly one of the most confusing yet satisfying things I've seen, amd the show can dip into the slightly ubsurd from time to time. And If you want discussions on morality it's the right show. Like 'Does it condem or condone the police?' 'Is it okay to do questionable things for the 'greater good'?' And what is that?' 'Should marginalised people try to work within an unjust system?' 'Should you try to change or take down the system, and is they even possible?' Sam Tyler positions himself as a sort of 'unwitting crusader' for equal rights (especially women's rights), under the guise of being 'just a decent bloke', but how appropriate and sincere are his efforts, considering his privileged position in society both as a white man and police officer? Honestly please please just watch the show I'm doing such a bad job explaining it.

Music is very much important to Life on Mars (as the name might suggest). Like the song Life on Mars plays diegeticaly in his car as Sam suffers the accident than becomes non diegetic as he wakes up in the past. And the show is filled with 70s music, if that's your thing.

Honestly all the characters are so much fun. They're all some shade of flawed and some are like, downright awful people, yet the show still can make you enjoy sympathise for them!? I'd say by the end Sam's little detective squad is like the world's most dysphunctional found family. But they're all completely iconic, just so entertaining, and definitely some good pathetic guy rep. Oh talking about rep there's no explicit queer rep (since that was on your list), but there is some fun homoerotic tension between Sam and his dci boss Gene Hunt who I can't belive I haven't mentioned yet because he's like the most iconic thing from Life on Mars. Like if you know anything about it, chances are it's him. His deal is that he's bigoted against basically everyone except himself, which sounds like a recipe for some pretty cringe inducing comedy but he's never presented as in the right for this and its funny in its ridiculousness rather than making fun of minorities. Like there's a scene where he straight up tells Sam that he's gay for being in love with a woman, completely unironically.

That's like the basics, and I suppose there are some caveats. The show is approaching 20 years old and it hasn't aged 100% perfectly (although I wouldn't condem it as capital P Problematic). (Particularly, I think it could do better with its sparse poc rep). Also to be responsible I should say there's basically a content warning for every bigotry and phobia under the sun because my god these characters can be awful people sometimes. But the show never condones it and although it's made light of, you're laughing at the bigots. (Like for example I'm autistic and while a small part of me instinctively tensed up at the ableism, I never felt I was being made fun of). It's not a show for people who can't handle nuanced characters or themes. But I really don't want to put you off because I must reiterate how good it is.

Every episode feels like eating a really rich satisfying meal and I'd look at the time bar and be amazed I'm only like 20 minutes in each time. I think a testament to its quality is the fact that I watched it with my family and we all loved it despite the fact we tend to have differing views on what we like to get out of media nd how we enjoy it. Me and my sister would talk and talk about the show as we watched it and argue about theories and characters- it's incredibly engaging. If you initally liked BBC Sherlock for being complex and deep but ultimately left really dispointed (like I was) then it's definitely the show for you because it has all the reality bending, complexity, twisting plot lines and deep imagery that BBC Sherlock claimed to have but actually delivers on it in a satisfying, thought provoking way and treats its characters and audience with so much more respect. There were so many opportunities they could have dropped the ball but they always keep a firm hold on it from start to finish.

So on to the practicalities: there's two series (seasons) comprising 8 episodes of 1 hour each. So 16 hours of show overall (although it feels like more in the best possible way). In the UK (where both it and I am from) it's very easy to watch, being on bbc iplayer and also fairly easy to pick up on dvd second hand (that's how I watched it). But outside of the uk I actually don't know how you legally access it (of course you can find everything online illegally!). Also there's lots of other reigion specific adaptations, (including a US one) but I'm talking about the british one and haven't seen any others. Finally, there's a sequal show called Ashes to Ashes, which has some cross over. I've heard good things about it and am watching it soon (it's also on iplayer), but haven't yet.

Few! That was a lot but I still feel I only scraped the surface. I hope that wasn't too much! Thank you for the opportunity to info dump. If you do check it out I hope you enjoy it. It was popular with the general British public when it aired (although I wouldn't know I was tiny and small at the time), but has not enjoyed the same fame and attention as other classic late 00's British TV like Doctor who or Sherlock, which I think is a big shame. The fandom is very little but incredibly passionate :)

ever wanted to rant to someone about your hyperfixations? now's your shot!

hi, i'm frey. and i'm interested in YOUR hyperfixations!

so, due to recent events, i will no longer be posting or reblogging our flag means death content. i'm trying to distance myself from the show in general, but i'm the kinda guy who can't survive without at least one hyperfixation. i decided that the best way to get over all this shit is to find something new to obsess over.

that's where you come in. yes, you. i know that a lot of my wonderful lovely dear mutuals have several hyperfixations that i don't. and i am interested in adopting your hyperfixations as my own.

reblog this post with an info-dump about your current hyperfixation!

information i need:

the name of your hyperfixation

what form of media it is

where i can find it

information i don't need, but would love to hear anyways:

your favourite character(s)

music you associate with your hyperfixation

headcanons

anything else you wanna say, i wanna hear all of it

sharing some of my own interests and preferences under the cut, if you wanna get a better idea of my tastes/make sure i don't already know about your hyperfixation :3

already interested in: good omens, the locked tomb, camp here & there, nevermoor, adventure time.

my preferred forms of media to consume are tv shows, book series, and fiction podcasts. i'm not interested in real life related hyperfixations, sorry :(

i have no genre preference, but i like a bit of humor mixed with mystery, horror, fantazy, sci-fi, all that good stuff.

shortcuts to grabbing my interest:

philosophy! does your hyperfixation include a bit of debate about morality and/or reality? tell me more!!!!

music! is music significant to the story? hell. yes.

queer stuff! bonus points for trans stuff!

pathetic little guy(s)! my favourite type of fictional guys!!

absurdism! i love when shit makes no sense!!!!

go forth, my beautiful mutuals and others who might or might not find this post. tell me everything.

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juniebuggs-blog · 2 years ago

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Love the world building in this chapter. Your writing is so imersive, I feel myself getting sucked in every time I read a new chapter. Great work!

| the paradigm complex | four |

pairing: ot8 ateez x fem! reader

genre: yandere!vampire!cult!poly! ateez au

warnings: yandere behavior, cursing, mentions of violence, manipulation, toxic relationships

They'll do whatever you ask. Anything you need. Anything you want. It's yours. They'll fulfill your every desire and whim. Give you the life you had always dreamed about.

And in exchange, you wouldn't just give them your soul. Oh, no. They weren't demons. What good was your soul alone when your purpose was better served alive and well? Your soul was nice, sure but it wasn't all they wanted. It wasn't all they needed. They needed your body, your mind. Your blood. You entirely. Every single fiber of your being was essential and would soon be theirs and theirs alone.

The moment you signed that contract, everything would change. For them and for you.

You just didn't know it yet.

And there was nothing you could do about it.

wordcount: 7.8k

a/n: i had lots of motivation to write this next part, so it's coming your way a bit sooner than normal. i actually meant to have it done earlier, but life got a little crazy. i hope you all enjoy and thank you so much for all your support!

| three | four | five |

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Even before you opened your eyes, you knew something wasn’t quite right; the bed and sheets were different from the one you were used to. They were stiff around you, not quite broken in, leading you to slowly become aware of the growing ache in your neck. But despite the subtle awareness something wasn’t quite right in the back of your mind, you did little more than switch to your other side and bury yourself deeper beneath the covers, hoping for just a bit more sleep before your alarm went off.

Your movement shifted your face towards the windows, however, and left you pulling the comforter over your head to block out the bright light. You groaned, wondering why the hell it was so bright in your room before realization finally dawned on you.

“Shit!” you cursed, yanking the blankets off and scrambling around for your phone. The fact you were currently inside the bed of your new apartment only briefly registered in your mind when the nightstand you instinctively reached for was nonexistent, much more concerned over the fact you were late for work.

Another round of curses rolled past your lips when you finally managed to find your phone tangled in the sheets next to you and saw that it was nearly two hours past the time your shift was supposed to start. You scrambled to unlock your phone, ready to type out an apology to your manager and let her know you would be there as soon as you could when you noticed the previous conversation above. Your brow scrunched as you read and reread the messages between the two of you, trying to not only make sense of her words, but your own as well. The conversation had taken place the night before, and yet, you had no memory of her texting you and letting you know you had been taken off the schedule, let alone that you had openly acknowledged this fact.

You looked up from your phone, briefly taking in your new apartment around you and wondering how and why you ended up here. You remembered coming over to unpack, including Mingi and Jongho coming over to help you, and then of the invitation of going over to Wooyoung’s for dinner, but things grew hazy afterwards. You had gone with full intentions of leaving early to head back to your boyfriend’s apartment, but that clearly hadn’t happened.

Why?

Why hadn’t you gone back? Was it because you had discovered you were being taken off your work schedule? Had you decided to just stay the night here and go back to grab the rest of your stuff later, when the sun was back out? But if so, why couldn’t you remember? If you focused hard enough, you thought you could pull fragments of a phone conversation with Felix, but anything more only made your head begin to throb.

“Oh, god,” you groaned, head collapsing down into your hands. It had happened again; another lapse in your memory.

This wasn’t the first time something like this had happened to you; having experienced similar bouts of amnesia in the past few years. At least, you were pretty sure this wasn’t the first time it had happened. You were pretty sure you had experienced occurrences similar to this one before, but the longer you thought about it, the less certain you were. Any time you had questioned Jae about it, he had always brushed back your concern, saying you were just imagining things, but how could you imagine something that wasn’t there?

You had no time to ponder this last question, pulled away when there was a knock on your door downstairs. The sound had you jumping, wondering who was at your door and what it was they could possibly want from you. You hadn’t been expecting company, at least you didn’t think you were, but who knew at this point. You could have very well made plans the night before with someone and forgotten all about them.

When the knock repeated itself a few moments later, you realized that you couldn’t just continue to sit in bed. You needed to go answer the door, but in your haste to do just that, you knocked over a glass of water that had been set beside your bed. You cursed as the water spilled, setting the glass back upright and taking a quick note of the bottle of Tylenol beside it. A bottle that was most certainly not yours.

You had no time to ponder this new revelation or to clean up the water you had just spilled, and left both items as they were as you continued to scramble your way down the stairs and towards your front door.

It wasn’t until you swung the door open and saw Hongjoong standing on the other side perfectly immaculate that you gave any sort of thought about your own appearance. His hair had been styled to appear effortless, but you were familiar enough with the process to know it must have taken him a while based on your past experiences with Felix, and though his clothes also appeared casual at first glance, you knew they were probably worth more than you made in a month. It was a stark contrast to the sweats you still wore from the day before and the bedraggled state you were in from just waking up.

“Good morning!” Hongjoong’s smile faded as you opened the door, taking in your dazed state. “I’m sorry, I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“Oh, no.” You shook your head, subconsciously attempting to straighten your hair up as you shifted your stance in the doorway. What was he doing here? “I was already awake.”

“Oh, good.” His smile returned. “I didn’t think you had any food at your place since it was all a little last minute, so I brought you some coffee and muffins.” He motioned to the items in his hand, making your eyes widen.

“Thank you.” You struggled to come up with a proper response, taken back by his act of kindness. Why would he do something like this for you and why did it create a wave of warmth flooding through you, especially with the smile he was giving you right now. “Um, would you like to come in?”

Hongjoong nodded, returning his gratitude as he walked past you into your apartment. You closed the door behind him, doing your best to calm your racing heart as he approached the small kitchen to your right. You weren’t upset by his appearance, not really, but the timing had been impeccable, catching you completely off guard as you had tried to piece the night before back together.

“How’s your head doing?” He extended one of the cups of coffee towards you, but you hardly noticed, much more focused on the question he had just asked.

“My head?” Your head tilted, once again trying your hardest to recapture the memories you had forgotten, but coming up short once more. Had you hit it last night? Was that why your mind was so hazy and why you had stayed here instead of going back like originally planned?

It was hard to hide your panic in that moment, suddenly very conscious of the fact you had little memory of your time with him and the others last night. You trusted yourself enough to know you couldn’t have done anything especially crazy, but what if your actions had been purely accidental? What if you had hit your head? God, that was an accident you would have a hard time living down.

“Ah, I see. You don’t remember anything, do you?” It was hard to read his expression, but his smile felt teasing, leaving you more worried than you had been before. Oh, god, what had you done? “Well, if your head’s not bothering you, then I would take that as a good sign. I was worried the hangover would hit you hard this morning. Which is partially why I made the excuse to bring you breakfast. I wanted to make sure you were okay after last night.”

You barely heard his last confession, brain locking on to his reference before. Hangover?

What did he mean by that? You hadn’t drank anything last night, fully acknowledging the fact you still had a long drive back to your boyfriend’s apartment. And even if you didn’t plan on making the drive back anymore, you were certain you wouldn’t have drank much, if at all, not wanting to risk making a fool of yourself later on. His words didn’t make any sense, and yet, it had to be true, didn’t it? How else would you explain the black spots in your memory? You must have gotten drunk.

“Oh, god, I’m so sorry.” You could feel your face heating up, more embarrassed than you had ever been before. Not just from the action itself, but from the sudden fear of what you might have done in your drunken haze. “I can’t believe I did that.” Your arms wrapped around your chest, unable to quite look Hongjoong in the eyes anymore. What the hell had you been thinking last night? What had gotten into you to think that had been a good idea?

“No, no, it’s okay.” Hongjoong set the coffee back down on the counter and reached for your shoulder, shifting your eyes back towards him. “If anything, we’re probably the ones to really blame.” His expression was almost sheepish when you met his gaze once more, as though the situation embarrassed him just as much as you. “We might have encouraged you to drink a bit too much in the first place, but you were so excited at the prospect of breaking up with your boyfriend, that we thought it was a proper cause for celebration.”

“Oh.” Your lips twisted, mulling over the new set of information he had given you. What all had you said? How much information about your life had you given them? And god, what exactly had you done once you had started drinking?

You hadn’t… done anything with one of them, had you?

No. You shook your head, though it did little to stop another blush from blooming across your cheeks once more. You may have lost quite a bit of your self-control when you were drunk, but you wouldn’t have done something like that, and you couldn’t imagine any of them willing to partake either. They had been so kind to you so far, more than respectful of you and your boundaries. You wouldn’t have. And they wouldn’t have. You were certain…

…But still? What if?

“Hongjoong, I didn’t do anything… crazy last night, did I?” It hurt to ask, and yet, you needed to know. You couldn’t very well face any of them with the what ifs stuck in your head.

Luckily, he shook his head. “No. Once we realized you had probably had a drink too many, I brought you back here to sleep it off. You pretty much crashed as soon as your head hit the pillow.”

“Thank you.” His words served as a reminder to the medicine and water set beside your bed, finally discovering the origin to both. “And I’m really sorry about last night. It might be hard to believe, but that’s really not like me at all.” You shook your head, trying once again to piece the night together. “I don’t know what got into me.” You just wished you could remember something about last night. Anything.

“Don’t worry about it. We’ve all had our fair share of drunken nights in the past, so no one’s judging you for it.” He gave your shoulder a comforting squeeze, guiding you over to the kitchen island where the food sat. “But I’m guessing that means you don’t remember we had made plans to go back to your apartment together, do you?”

You graciously took the coffee he handed you this time around. Usually, you preferred tea over coffee, but you would never pass on a cup, especially seeing as Hongjoong had gone out of his way for you. And after the night you had just had, perhaps the coffee would do something to jumpstart your brain again, allowing you access to the memories that were no longer there.

“I’m so sorry, but you would be correct about that.” You paused, taking a sip of your coffee and wishing you could have made a much better first impression with them all. “To be completely honest, the only thing I really remember about last night is getting my ass kicked in Smash Bros.”

The comment earned a chuckle from Hongjoong, easing a bit of the tension in your shoulders. Despite your embarrassment, he didn’t seem to be judging you too harshly for it. “Well, if you’re still interested, I had offered to tag along with you back to your old apartment and help you grab the rest of your stuff.” He opened up the box he had brought, proffering it towards you and prompting you to take one of the muffins inside.

You grabbed one at random, voicing your gratitude as you were once again struck by how kind he had been. Not only had he ensured you made it back to your room unscathed last night, leaving you water and pills to help with the possibility of a hangover, but he had also thought to check up on you and grab you food knowing you had none. “And if you don’t mind tagging along, I would appreciate the help, but you don’t have to. I’m sure I can manage just fine on my own if I need to.”

“I don’t mind, really. After all, it’s the perfect excuse to get to know you better.” His words pulled you in, stopping you in your tracks. You had a hard time interpreting the statement, the smile that swiftly followed causing a strange pit to form in your stomach.

You fiddled with the muffin in your hand, not quite finding it so appealing anymore, as you struggled to come up with a response. “I hate to disappoint, but I’m afraid I’m not all that terribly interesting.”

Hongjoong leaned forward against the counter, propping his forearms up against it as he assessed you from the other side. “I find that very hard to believe.”

Something about his expression resonated within you, and you were struck with a sudden flurry of memories rushing through your mind of the night before. Or, at least, you had thought they were some of your missing ones; the innocent interactions you had with him and the others at the kitchen counter quickly fading to something else altogether. Your fingers fluttered to your lips before you could stop them, wondering why the hell you were suddenly picturing his lips encasing your own, let alone them traveling further downward, flitting over your racing pulse.

“Is something wrong?”

Hongjoong’s question brought you back to reality and you quickly dropped your hand. “No, I’m good.” You shook your head, doing your best to keep the blush the earlier thoughts brought and wondering just what had brought them on. He was attractive, there was no doubt about that, but you had never imagined something like this with anyone before, let alone something that vivid. “Just a bit out of still, I suppose.”

You observed him for a few seconds out of the corner of your eye, trying to figure him out. Hongjoong had been nothing but sweet and kind to you since you had met him, just like all the others, but that didn’t mean you knew him either. He had claimed nothing had happened the night before, and all the signs certainly pointed in that direction, but what if he was lying? What if something had happened? After all, you hadn’t been the only one drinking last night and he wanted to save both of you from the embarrassment.

But you smothered this thought as quickly as it came. There was no way that was true; you just couldn’t believe him or any of the others might have taken advantage of you in that way. The better solution was that you had simply dreamed it; your drunken state bringing your attraction to the man into full focus and into your dreams.

You excused yourself soon after, heading back upstairs to the bathroom to get ready once you realized your appetite had long left you. And one look in the mirror was all it took to further solidify your previous sentiments. Even if you were currently disheveled from sleeping at the moment, there was no way someone like Hongjoong would have shown enough interest in you to ever kiss you like that. He was in a completely different league than you, one you could never hope to achieve. Why would someone like him want you? Why would anyone want you? You weren’t pretty enough. You weren’t confident enough, and you sure as hell weren’t rich enough. And then, you couldn’t forget the utter fool of yourself you had made when you had gotten drunk off your ass last night. You were nothing short of a walking disaster. You knew it. They knew it. And if for some reason they hadn’t figured it out yet, they would. Jae certainly had.

You craved to take a shower and change your clothes, the anxiety of your current appearance creeping up on you, but you didn’t have the proper supplies to do either at the moment. Instead, you settled for simply rinsing your face off with some cold water and pulling your hair up and out of your face for the time being. You straightened out your clothes as best you could, hating that all you could do was wait until you got to your destination to change into something clean.

“I guess I’m ready whenever you are.”

Hongjoong was still in the kitchen when you made your way back down, taking a short detour to clean up the water you had spilled and grab the pill bottle that was his and return it. He was still leaning over the counter as you approached, munching on one of the muffins with his phone in hand. Upon hearing you speak, he leaned back up, giving you another one of his breathtaking smiles, though this time it did little more than deepen the growing pit in your chest. Why the hell was he so nice to you? All it did was serve to make you feel worse than you already did.

“Alright then,” he pocketed his phone, oblivious to the effect his actions had on you, “lead the way.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Hongjoong had never wished he could read someone’s mind more than he did now; your silent figure in the passenger seat making him yearn for just a small peak inside that pretty, little head of yours. Sadly, only the demons had that ability, and all he could do was attempt to coax them out of you, but that was a precarious and unreliable process. Without the proper concentration, you could very well just end up telling him what he wanted to hear and not whatever thoughts held you captive at the moment.

When you shifted in your seat next to him, his eyes once again trailed to the curving slope of your neck in the rearview mirror, now on full display with your hair being tied up. The majority of your scent was still covered up by the vampire who had previously taken possession of you, but it had grown stronger since last night, having now been a few days since you had last consumed his blood. It was this singular fact that had saved you the night before. If your scent had been any more prevalent, he knew he wouldn’t have been able to restrain himself, allowing himself to give in to his desires and sink his fangs into your fragile skin to take his fill.

It had been a combined effort of them all to erase your memories. Your cursed lineage might have made your mind weak to his kind’s manipulation, but without their blood flowing through you at the moment, they were limited on exactly what all they could do with you. Though your boyfriend was far weaker than them, really nothing more than a child, his blood did hold some sway over your mind, helping to keep you close to him and protect you from others’ who wished to manipulate you. And though it had been easy enough to cover their track and lead you to accept his tale of the events with little push, he knew something about it hadn’t sat quite right with you. He had seen the way you had looked at him when you thought he wasn’t looking, clearly taking note of the way your fingers had fluttered to your lips earlier. Something had leaked through their fog, but it didn’t concern him. The way your cheeks had continually tinted pink told him everything he needed to know.

He still wondered how the hell they had gotten this lucky. There weren’t many of your kind around anymore; your ancestors long learning how to protect and hide themselves from his kind, so to not only have you walk straight into their lives yourself, but to do so unbound was completely unheard of. No vampire in their right mind would ever let you walk around so freely, especially in another clan’s territory. He had been certain it was a trick when Yeosang had first made mention of it, certain you were there on behalf of your master, but one little taste of your blood was all it had taken for Yeosang to see otherwise. You might have been currently tied to someone else, but you weren’t bound to anyone, not by the standards of vampiric law, meaning you were more than fair game for anyone to take.

“It’s the one up there on the left.”

“Got it.”

Hongjoong’s eyes flicked back to the road when you spoke, taking note of the building you had just mentioned and maneuvering his way over. He had thought he could be patient with you, but the longer he was around you, the less patient he became. Your scent was growing stronger, sweeter than anything he had ever smelled before, and he was beginning to become well aware of the fact the following days of waiting for the other’s blood to leave your system wouldn’t just be tortuous for you.

“It shouldn’t take that long.” You straightened up in your seat, fingers fiddling with the ends of your sleeves and serving as a telltale sign of the nerves flowing through you. Whether this was caused by his presence or the fact you were leaving the relationship you had been tied to for years, it was hard for him to tell. “It’s mostly just clothing and books I’m wanting to grab, but there’s a few other belongings I’d rather not lose too.”

“Don’t worry about the time,” he replied. “I have nothing else to do today, so I’m in no hurry.” And he wasn’t, wanting to fully savor the time he had with you alone and in no hurry to be back at The Paradigm where his brothers would be vying with each other for your full attention. If anything, he would do everything in his power to prolong your time out together, taking full advantage of having you all to himself.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked, curiosity finally getting the better of him once he parked the car and the two of you were on your way upstairs. He could hear your heartbeat racing beside him, increasing the strength of your scent momentarily as your nerves got the better of you.

“Oh, yeah, I’m okay.” You nodded, but your hands fumbled with the keys you held, causing them to drop on the floor in front of you.

Hongjoong understood why your nerves had suddenly spiked. According to Mingi, this wasn’t the first time you had attempted to leave and you feared this time would end up just like all the others. And if you hadn’t happened to have stumbled upon them, it would have. If you had left for anywhere else, you would have just been tracked down and dragged right back to where you had started. But as terrifying as that aspect might have been for you, it was far better than the fate that would have awaited you if he or another vampire wouldn’t have found you in time.

But you didn’t have to worry. Neither of those outcomes would be happening this time around. Hongjoong knew this other vampire would try to get you back once he realized what had happened, but his efforts would be futile. Nothing he said or did would get you back, and would only serve to seal his own fate. He had his own fair share of crimes to pay for in due time, after all, the fact he had been turned illegally was the least of his problems. But, they would deal with that all in due time; they still had use of him yet.

And as much as he hated the vampire who had originally had you - if he had understood how lucky he truly was to have you, he would have never treated you the way he had - Hongjoong had to give him some credit; his former treatment of you making it all the easier for them to draw you in. It had left you with a deep craving for something more, desperate to be loved. Desperate to be wanted. You yearned for a deeper sort of intimacy, wanting to be seen. Wanting to be held. You were broken and desperate for someone to come pick up the pieces, and who was he to deny you such a request? He would do anything you wanted, anything you desired. He would give you the life and love you yearned for, and all he asked in return was you entirely.

And that wasn’t really asking much, now was it?

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“y/n!”

It had only taken a few seconds for Felix to notice your appearance, calling out your name and waving you over shortly after you had entered the small store with Hongjoong in tow. You had told the man there was no need for him to come in, that you would only need a few seconds to drop some things off, but he had shrugged your concerns away, simply stating he didn’t mind accompanying you.

You quickly matched the bright smile the blond gave you, taking clear note of the way Felix’s eyes had roamed over towards Hongjoong before slowly returning back to you. His left brow raised, quietly questioning you as to whose company it was you currently kept, all the while doing nothing to hide the sly smirk when his eyes roamed over once more.

You quickly excused yourself from Hongjoong, hoping for a few minutes of peace with Felix to straighten things out before he had a chance to embarass you. Of all the years you had known the man, he had never been known for his subtlety and this was exactly why you had wished Hongjoong would have just waited in the car.

“Who the hell is that?” He wasted no time as you came around the counter, excusing himself from the front to come take with you.

“That is Kim Hongjoong,” your voice was low, pausing for a second to make sure the person of interest hadn’t followed you over before finishing your statement, “the current owner of The Paradigm.”

“Holy shit, n/n!” Felix’s eyes widened. “You weren’t lying; the guy is a fucking god.”

“Felix!” You scolded, hands raising up towards his mouth and muffling the loud reaction he had to your revelation as best you could. You followed Felix’s gaze back to where Hongjoong stood browsing a nearby section of the store, hoping he hadn’t and wouldn’t hear the conversation that was sure to come. He didn’t appear to have noticed, but it was hard to tell if that was a smile crossing his face or not from the angle you were at.

Whatever Felix said next, you weren’t sure. words muffled by your hands still covering his mouth. You gave him a pointed look, but removed your hands allowing him to speak freely once more.

“And just what is he doing here with you, hmm?” Felix’s brows lifted, leaning back against the counter.

“He’s just here to help me out.” You crossed your arms, fighting the blush Felix’s smug expression brought. “I needed some help getting the rest of my stuff from Jae’s, so he offered to lend a hand.” Perhaps not the exact truth. He had been the one to offer without any prompt from you and had then taken you out for lunch afterwards on top of bringing you breakfast that morning, but Felix didn’t need to know any of that. Not when it was clear Hongjoong was just helping you. “He’s just being friendly, Lix. That’s all.” Because why would it be anything more than that?

“Friendly, my ass,” Felix snorted, merely amused by your explanation. “No man would go out of his way to help a girl out this much and just want to be friends, n/n. I would know.”

“Well, you would be wrong this time around. After all, he’s not the only one who’s helped me these past few days.” Though his words did cause your cheeks to tint, you didn’t put much merit into them. Despite what Felix thought, Hongjoong was just being nice. “Mingi and Jongho helped me unpack quite a bit yesterday and then Wooyoung invited me to dinner with them all. They’re just trying to make sure I feel welcomed into their community.”

Felix hummed, unconvinced. “Oh, you young, naive fool.”

“Felix, he’s my boss!” Your eyes narrowed.

“So, you’re telling me if that man cornered you and professed his undying love, you’d just what? Politely decline?”

“Yes!”

But the slight hesitation in your reply and the way your face fully flamed at the thought was all Felix needed to know your answer wasn’t completely honest. In reality, you knew you didn’t want to mess with another relationship at the moment, desperate for some time to heal on your own and not wanting to hurt anyone with a rebound, but you didn’t know what you would do if a scenario similar to the one Felix had just mentioned were to happen. Especially when your mind traveled back to the thought of his lips tracing down your neck…

“And let’s also not forget that I literally just broke up with Jae. I don’t want to date anyone right now.” And you didn’t, right? Right?

“So, you finally did it?” Felix’s expression lightened at the mention of your ex-boyfriend, giving you a much needed distraction from the person you had come in with.

You nodded. “I left the letter on the fridge.”

It should have been simple to write, but it had taken you forever to complete. No matter which way you phrased it, it felt wrong, leading you to scribbling things out and starting anew just about twenty times. The first had felt too harsh, but the second one not quite harsh enough, almost encouraging him that a second chance might still be on the table. Nothing you wrote seemed to work, and if it wasn’t for Hongjoong coming to your rescue at the end, you didn’t doubt you would have never been able to write something that had satisfied you and would still be scribbling away.

“And you blocked him?”

“Oh, no.” Your lips twisted, not quite thinking that far ahead into things. God only knew what he would try to do once he found the letter you had left him tomorrow. “I guess I should, shouldn’t I?”

You pulled your phone out of your back pocket, ignoring the message from Yeosang for now asking if anyone wanted to hang out later tonight and clicking on the conversation with your former boyfriend. Your eyes briefly scanned over the previous messages, feeling a tiny stab of panic. Were you really about to do this? Writing the letter had been one thing, but blocking his number felt much more permanent, officially cutting him out of your life completely.

Was that something you wanted?

It was strange. This was a day you had been looking forward to for so long, and yet, now that you were here, you didn’t know what it was that you wanted. You didn’t want to stay. You knew that, but he had been all you had known for so long. What if he was right? What if you did need him? You had never been on your own before, so what if you weren’t capable of it? What would happen when your life fell apart on you and you were left with no other choice but to go crawling back and praying he would take you?

Perhaps cutting him off from your life wasn’t the best choice. Perhaps all you needed was a short break from each other, some time to think things over before finalizing them. Then maybe the two of you could talk things out…

Seeing your hesitation, Felix plucked the phone from you hands, using your distracted state to his advantage.

“He, give that back!” You reached for your phone, but he held it above him, just out of your reach. “Damn you and your stupid long legs,” you cursed, but you didn’t really mean it, not when you knew he was only doing what you weren’t quite able to do yourself, just like Hongjoong before.

“There, all done.” He was about to hand your phone back to you when it buzzed from an incoming message. “Ooo, who’s Mingi and why is he texting you?” Felix’s brows wriggled before opening it up to read. “Hey, just checking in on you to see how you’re doing. Did you and Hongjoong-”

“Give it back!”

Your face tinted as Felix read the message out loud, once again reaching for the phone in his hands. Thankfully, you got him unprepared this time around and were able to snag it back before he found any of the other messages you had on your phone from the rest of them. You didn’t know what you would do if he had found the group message you were in with them. None of it was anything but friendly, but he would find a way to make it seem more than it was.

“I’m so glad to see you’re feeling better,” you mumbled, locking your phone back up and putting it back in your pocket for the time being; you could text Mingi back later.

“Yeah, sorry about that.” Felix’s smile turned sheepish as he scratched at the back of his head. “I think it was one of those twenty-four hour stomach bugs or something. It came on fast, but besides some exhaustion this morning, I felt fine.” He shrugged, covering up a yawn with one of his hands. “But, I should be free after work in an hour if you want some help unpacking.”

“Really, that would be great!”

You brightened up at his offer, fully knowing having Felix with you tonight would help calm your nerves. While his teasing helped to distract you from the issue at hand, your mind never fully strayed from it. What would Jae think when he got home tomorrow and found the letter? Would he try anything? And if so, what?

Felix straightened up before you had a chance to go over any of the details for the night, and when you noticed his eyes straying to your right, you turned to find Hongjoong approaching.

You did your best to match the smile Hongjoong gave you, but you weren’t quite able to completely suppress the blush his figure brought from your earlier conversation with Felix. “Hongjoong, this is my friend, Felix.” You were quick to introduce the two when he got close, hoping once again that he had been too far away to hear anything Felix had said about him. “Felix, this is Hongjoong.”

“Nice to meet you,” Felix was the first to speak, a smug grin on his face as he extended his hand towards Hongjoong. “n/n here has talked quite a bit about you.”

You blanched, inwardly cursing the boy out in your head. You should have known better than to trust Felix around any of them, especially once it had been made known you found Hongjoong and the others' each physically attractive.

Hongjoong’s smile relaxed at Felix’s words, earning a soft chuckle that only served to increase your nerves and leave you yearning to disappear. “Likewise.”

“I’m sorry if I kept you waiting.” Afraid for where the conversation might go if you let them, you quickly rummaged around in your bag for the few items you were there to drop off. “Felix and I just got to talking.” You gave your friend a pointed look, hoping he would listen to your silent plea and not do anything else to embarass you further.

“Right, we were actually just discussing what we were going to do to celebrate y/n’s breakup.” You should have known better than to trust Felix to back down, and you inwardly cursed the boy once more, absolutely terrified for the next words that would come out of his mouth. “We were thinking about maybe going clubbing since it’s been a while n/n’s been out dancing and I know how much you love to.” Felix’s expression was smug as he continued, ignoring how embarrassed the conversation made you. “If you and your other friends are free, you should come too. The more, the merrier, after all.”

You opened your mouth to intervene, wanting to tell Hongjoong he didn’t have to nor should he feel obligated to, but Hongjoong beat you to it, answering Felix’s invitation before you could open your mouth.

“I’d love to, and I’m sure the others would be down as well.” Hongjoong’s eyes brushed in your direction, the smile he gave deepening the blush that painted your cheeks. And for a split second there, you thought Felix might have been right. Perhaps Hongjoong did harbor some attraction towards you. “In fact, I’m close with the owners of Illusion downtown, so I wouldn’t have any issue getting us in if you wanted to go there.”

For a moment there, you had forgotten just who Hongjoong was and the status he must have held in the city, but one mention of Illusion, the most sought after club in the city, was all it took to remind you just who he was. The waitlist for it was months long, and the entry fee far higher than you could ever afford.

“Oh, no. I wouldn’t want to put you out of your way.” Even Felix seemed taken back by the mention, catching him off guard for a split second.

“It’s no problem, really,” Hongjoong replied. “The owners actually owe me quite a few favors, so I pretty much have acess to it whenever I want, and if we’re going to celebrate y/n’s new status, then we might as well do it in style.”

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Wait, he was the one to invite us?” San asked, straightening up from the couch once Hongjoong had mentioned their new plans with you on Friday night.

No one had complained when he had first told them, as the idea had been nothing less than perfect. What better way to show you off to the others than at Illusion? But then Hongjoong had let it slip that your friend would be joining them in the endeavor.

Hongjoong nodded. “I think we might have misjudged him. He certainly seemed very interested in our relationship with her.”

He remembered the way your friend had referred to him in the beginning, a reflection of the way you must have referenced them in the past. The way you had immediately freaked out and glanced in his direction terrified he might have overheard you all but clarification of it. Of course, your attempt at hushing your friend had failed. His senses were far superior than your own and he had caught every word that had come out of each of your mouths, even the ones you had whispered in return.

“And what exactly does that mean?” There was a venom in Yeosang’s voice, still clearly upset over the fact you had declined his invitation to come over in favor of the very man they were currently talking about. The very man who was still alone with you inside your apartment one floor down.

“It means he has far more interest in us than he does with her.”

You may have attempted subtly in your attraction to them, but your friend had not. Not only had Hongjoong been acutely aware of the way his eyes had traversed his figure more than once, but also of the way his pulse had quickened when he had finally approached; a telltale sign of the attraction he also felt towards him.

“Oh,” Yeosang chuckled, collapsing back down on his couch. It didn’t quite make up for the fact you had still chosen him over them for the night - something you would not be doing again - but it did help lighten the urge he had to go down the one floor to your room and toss him out, if he didn’t kill him first. “How does he smell?” He had gotten brief hints of the man’s scent since he had arrived hours earlier, but had been unable to exactly pinpoint it between the others that filled the building.

“Does it matter?” Seonghwa’s brow raised, swirling the glass in his hand. Haru’s blood had used to be his favorite, but he had gotten a strong whiff of your own earlier. He had gotten subtle hints of it the night before, but it was much stronger tonight; the former vampire’s scent slowly dissipated with time. It was enough to make his current drink now less than desirable, wishing he didn’t have to wait a few more days for your system to purify itself.

“I guess not.” Yeosang shrugged, mind trailing to a similar train as Seonghwa’s. Out of all of them, he struggled the most with your growing scent and fought the fangs that threatened to come out each time he caught it. “But it does make the experience all the more enjoyable if and when we find the need to get rid of him.”

“Perhaps, but our best use of him is alive at the moment,” Hongjoong replied, setting down his own drink. He had thought spending the day with you would be advantageous, and it was, but even he had been fighting the urge to take you right there in the bookstore. You had gotten so flustered in the end, your scent had become nearly overwhelming, even with the other vampire’s covering parts of it. “He’s made it quite clear that he’s attempting to set her up with one of us.” And the way his teasing had gotten you all riled up, told him you didn’t mind. Not really.

“Really?” Wooyoung’s head cocked. “That’s a new one.” Their very nature was designed to attract humans to them; everything from their physical appearance to the scent of their blood was created to lure in their prey with little effort. The man should have been fighting to get closer to them himself, not encouraging others.

“Does that mean we’re going to let him come?” Mingi looked up from his phone, growing slightly as he took in the latest text message from you in a new light with the information Hongjoong had just provided. The smiley face you had included in your goodnight message now very possibly having been done by the boy hanging out with you and not yourself.

“I don’t see why not.” Yunho shifted beneath Mingi as he replied, the smile he sent down in his direction clearly stating he had come to the same conclusion as Mingi had over the text message he had boasted over a few moments ago. “I for one, would be more than happy to see just how flustered we can get her through him.”

“I don’t think Yunjin and Jiwoon would mind either,” Hongjoong added, mentioning the current owners of Illusion. “They’ve always had a fondness towards pretty things.”

“I don’t know,” San wasn’t entirely convinced. “I don’t really feel like having to share her attention any more than I already have to.”

“Sannie, she’ll be so drugged up on our blood, I doubt she’ll even remember he’s there, let alone that he even exists,” Seonghwa replied, putting the younger vampire’s mind at ease. “And if he’s as pretty as Hongjoong says, then his attention will quickly be pulled elsewhere as well. Though,” his eyes flashed in Hongjoong’s direction, “I would make it well known another incident like the one before is completely out of question if he’s as useful as you say he is.”

“After what you did last time, I highly doubt they’ll make the same mistake again,” Hongjoong laughed, remembering the onslaught his oldest friend had gone on after discovering one of Yunjin’s members had accidentally killed Seonghwa’s favorite human at the time, only for him to return the favor tenfold. “He was their favorite, remember?”

“Are we settled then?” Jongho asked, face buried in the jacket you had left in Hongjoong’s car from earlier. Wooyoung was also curled up close by, head leaning against his shoulder as he breathed in what pieces of your scent he could gather from it. “Because it’s already late and we still have quite a bit more to discuss.”

The purpose of tonight’s meeting was supposed to discuss how exactly they were going to handle your transition over to them throughout the upcoming days as well as the vampire that was bound to come calling tomorrow night when he noticed the card Hongjoong had left without your knowledge, but one mention of the man currently with you was all it took to get them off track before the meeting had even begun.

For once, everyone was in agreement with the plan. San and Yeosang weren’t entirely happy with the idea, though the latter was just still upset by being rejected earlier, but there was little resistance from either when it came down to it. Yunho had brought up a great point, after all, and if that didn’t work, then they could just do as Hongjoong had suggested and use your friend to make you jealous instead. Nothing would leave you craving their attention more than the sudden loss of it. They knew that from experience.

But in the end, it didn’t matter. One way or another, come Friday night, the transition would be complete and you would be completely theirs. And there was nothing you or your little friend could do about that.

─── ･｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

taglists will be in reblogs :)

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