#IM SCREWED !!!

[dsireland86]

I just freaking can't with this one! The amount of sweat that's coming off this man shouldn't be something that turns me and makes me weak AF! Holy shit!

[aleshfish]

oh no

[cupcake243]

Me: I like yanderes! 🤩

Also, me if they were real:

[honeygrahambitch]

Me when there's a plot twist in my life: well well if it's not the consequences of my actions

[girlintodust]

i need help/advice :(((

a few months ago a friend told me that he liked me, and at the time, i wasn't sure about my feelings. now i know that I like him, a lot, but he's been telling me about this girl he's been hanging out with and he thinks he likes her. he says that she likes him, and that it feels nice to be liked, so he might tell her to be her girlfriend. i want to tell him how I feel, but i feel maybe that would be... i don't know, wrong? i don't know what to do.

[dizzy1ife]

The ominous feeling when you do something guaranteed to cause a flare, but you don't feel the effects yet.

[anthonys237thfreckle]

GUESS WHO’S BACK GUYS

[bamsara]

what do you mean taxes are due in 4 days

[charcharrealsmooth]

Doing a project I had a year to do for bio in the 3 days before it's due goes crazy

Athena please help me gods I'm so screwed-

[sanestkanadefan]

Me when all the characters I want are 5 stars:

[kryptid-of-the-krows]

Guess who just started Hannibal

[dsireland86]

Dead. Fucking dead. 😳😵🤯🥵💀

[lexithwrites]

hate to be that person but im 100% using long song lyrics for a fic title lmao

[sheriffmango]

Mango moment:

I just bought a Phoenix Wright plushie for like 600 pesos (about 10 usd) but a few days ago before it came, the site told me that it was gonna deliver to my house tommorow however i would be in school for the majority of the day so the day before I had to force myself to tell my parents that I would have a 600 peso order that'lll arrive tommorow and they were like "huh what the fuck are you buying thats 600 pesos ?!" and me, humiliated beyond belief scrambled to come up with something and my dumbass told them that the item in question was actually a gift for a friend. I genuinely thought it was a more respectable thing to say. I did not want to tell them that I spent 600 pesos on a stupid looking plushie that's about the size of my palm. The day comes and I get my Phoenix plushie, all paid and good except for the fact that my parents asked me how my "friend" reacted to the "gift" so i just made up the most elaborate story ever that complicates things more than it should've and now they're mad at me that i've spent 600 pesos on a so-called friend (i have a history of spending ludicrious amounts for close friends) and now they think that i'm an irresponsible spender that are letting people take advantage of me. So throughout the time that i've had this damned phoenix plush i've been paranoid that they'll see the plush in my room and then ask me where I got it from so my solution has been being manic all day and hiding him by stuffing him in my school bag everytime I hear footsteps at the side of my room. This is. A mess.

[im-a-bit-deranged-me-think]

Now, you who has set foot in this world. Your journey has reached its end, but one final doorway remains. Step forth, if you have understood the meaning of your journey. Defeat me, command me to step aside, show me that you are worthier than I to rescue her. Then, the threads of all fate will be yours to re-weave. My memory has all but faded completely... But I will always remember how much she too, loved these flowers.

—Dainsleif, Teyvat Chapter Storyline Preview

BITCH NO. DAIN IS THE FINAL BOSS??? I AINT COMMANDING YOU TO STEP ASIDE SIR. I AM DYING. I WILL MEET MY DEMISE. DID YOU SEE HIM PUTTING THAT PROTECTIVE BARRIER AROUND US DURING THAT QUEST??? WHAT THE FUCK? I CANT FIGHT DAINSLEIF. HE TOO STRONG (and hot-) I WILL DIE.

anyways soo. who is she? lumine? she has inteyvats (“these flowers”) in her hair so is it her? also, the final quest of genshin should be called “The Sea of Flowers in the End” (did i capitalize that correctly?) who does dain wanna rescue? WAS DAIN IN LOVE??? his last sentence makes it seem like he may have loved “her”. My memory has all but faded completely… But I will always remember how much she too, loved these flowers.

it sounds like “she” may have been his lover or smth. dain in love? im actually kinda here for it tbh. or i might be overthinking cuz i know shit about the lore. i had to read about every. single. damn. thing. in every. single. archon. quest.

i wanna actually skip the entirety of natlan jus for snezhnaya cuz like, yess??? i want snezhnaya. i wanna infiltrate a few fatui strongholds (maybe meet pantalone i simp-) i wanna see the tsaritsa cuz we know what mauvika (pyro archon) or smth looks like. dont know bout you but i dont actually really like her design. idk why i dont like gingers (childe is an exception) her and aloy just arent it (nobody likes aloy anyway) also, arent her (pyro archon) and zhonglis japanese voice actors married? i will pull for her JUST to put her and zhongli in one team*. unless shes strong, ofc. if shes like, alhaitham level strong then bitch ill main her (ill just switch between her, alhaitham, and scara. simple.) but besides that, if she isnt strong and/or doesnt make exploring easier then i dont see a reason to main her. the archons should be strong, theyre fucking gods if theyre weak thats wrong. for ex, zhongli drops THE FUCKING MOON ON YOU for his burst, ei whips out an EYE??? and slashes you with the ELECTRO-LIGHTNING-POWERED-BOOBA-KATANA-SWORD, venti summons a LITERAL BLACK HOLE as his burst, nahidaaa… nahida, gives you… free housing? with furina you can turn into JESUS and WALK ON WATER (idk if this counts but neuvilette kills ANYTHING and EVERYTHING within like oh, i dont know! THREE SECONDS???)

*if guizhong ever becomes playable somehow (ik shes dead but still) then scratch that i will pull for guizhong and put HER and zhongli together just because, lovers shouldnt be seperated.

[smoooothoperatorrrr]

I'LL NEVER FORGET YOUNG CARLOS AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU!!!