#I've only read 2 fanfics in my life
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#I've only read 2 fanfics in my life#but damn#i am hooked#I'm not even a reading person#tw nudity#<- just in case even thought is a famous painting but you know#I should recreate this when I'm motivated enought to draw it#lyna stuff
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So I stumbled upon a fanfic that has a lot of Etsy merch and decided to see what was going on... I do not like it. But boy am I going to read it.
#so ive been on ao3 more in the last month than on my entire life before now#and I've now read more hp fanfic than the orginal work and om only on chapter#2
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Classic Fiyeraba fic recommendations
So, with the new movie coming out, I've seen a lot of requests here for people to write Fiyeraba particularly happy Shiz era stuff, and like guys, guys, I did not spend my formative teen years in the Wicked fanfiction.net section for people to act like the amazing fics there don't even exist.
So here is my list of the fics and authors so great that I remember it over a decade later
Obviously, given we have never had a situation before where people know act 1 but not act 2, there will be spoilers and act 2 stuff in a bunch of these, but please check them out.
(a few of the authors I know are still around tumblr I've tagged, but feel free to tell me if you want me to take it off).
Authors in no particular order:
Tiggy the Hopeless Romantic - Honestly just read anything this woman wrote, I think if anyone said Fiyeraba fanfic this would be the first name I think of - bonus that a lot of the stuff is easily digestible fluffy oneshots
Merina Thropp @merinathropp on Tumblr - Writes beautifully, I remember getting very excited when she uploaded new fic. I particularly remember her Fiyero's Shiz era twitter fic and her extended As Long As You're Mine fic
HC247 @a-partofthenarrative on Tumblr - Writes such lovely fluff and I think double digits on alaym fics! Particularly remember her Once Upon a Kiss series and Masquerade. She mostly writes POTO stuff now but I see occasionally get an alert in my inbox from her.
alinaandalion - another fantastic Fiyeraba writer (god there are so many) I particularly remember her for her A Drop in the Bucket series, which are a lovely series of Fiyeraba oneshots.
CrazyBeagle - one of the people on the Wicked section who has made the transition to real life friend. But I knew her for her fics before we became friends. To Feel is post musical fic which is a lovely realistic continuation of Fiyeraba's journey. Unlimited is a modern retelling of Wicked which I really enjoy though I have been told multiple times it will never be updated no matter how much I threaten.
Scandalacious Intentions @scandalaciousintentions on Tumblr - Candy is the other Wicked friend who has become an irl friend (and I am most certainly the only person who still calls her Candy). She is much better known for her Tonks/Lupin stuff, but I always loved what she wrote for Wicked. Witchy Woman was her first Wicked fic I still very much enjoy it.
Girlscout4ever wrote ever so beautifully. Cheap Rented Room is such a fantastic expanded ALAYM.
ElphabaROCKS - wrote a lot of very good Fiyeraba fluff
Vinkanwildflowerqueen @vinkunwildflowerqueen on Tumblr - I imagine a lot of you know her already as she is still writing! She writes a lot of very good Fiyeraba au fics
Fermantoso - one of the funniest writers in the section! Chasing Elphie is the one I remember best, au but funny and sweet.
Danderson - slightly more bookverse than a lot of the other writers here but still great fics!
Kaylle - There are Nights, is always the one people (including me) remember as it's one of the most beautiful pieces of fanfiction on the Wicked section, but all of her work is lovely.
Lost Ozian - Well known for her humour, The Fiyero User Manual springs immediately to mind, my favourite is actually her serious au fic Different
Me - debated whether to add this, but I was also part of the section back in the day, and I know people enjoyed my fics too, though God knows I've improve my writing in the last decade and a half - in terms of Fiyeraba my strongest were probably A Moment and Living. Perfect Together is unquestionably the best fic I wrote for Wicked, although it's more Flinda.
Individual Fics:
Like a Swan on a Lake - this fic was actually well after my time but I happened to read it and I love love love it! AU of Fiyero if both girls defied gravity together and it does such a good job of showing his intelligence
Broccoli - I remember this one being very sweet Shiz era Fiyeraba
According to Plan - funny fic, fun twist ending
Sincerely, an annoyed Shiz student - not strickly Fiyeraba but you should read it. It is a very fun parody.
It's a long way to fall - This was actually the fic I created a fanfic account for, because I hadn't realised you could anonymous review! A fun arranged marriage AU
Please, please add to this list if you have other recs, mine are about 10 years out of date. Also apologies if I've missed any out as there's so many good ones and it is 2am.
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Updating mine
MY TOP TEN FAVORITE JJK SHIPPS!!!!
10. SHOKOHIME
They stole Jogo and Hanami's place because I got it into my head that Jogo is like the grumpy grandfather and Hanai is the vegan aunt of the curse family! I like them. I think it's a ship with a lot of potential. I need to consume more content, but I love the fanarts!!!
9. HIGUNANA
This crack grew in me and now I'm suffering for them after the last chapter. In a kind universe, Higuruma and Nanami adopted Yuji and they live happily and happily!!! I think the two go together a lot and the fanfics are adorable! These Old Yaoi will be the death of me!!!!
8. CHOSOYUKI
They've come down a little, but man I still love them!!! Even more so now because my thirst for Choso awakened and I started reading fanfics of him being a good big brother and I fell to my knees! I still want to write more and explore his relationship with Yuji. And God, YUKI IS AMAZING!!!! THEY DESERVED TO STAY TOGETHER, AKUTAMI YOU DAMN IT!!!!
7. HIGUKUSA
A friend on twt is feeding me higukusa art and, god, this crack (not so crack, because that "I'll protect you even if I have to die for it" from kusakabe hit me hard) has taken root in my heart! I'm also obsessed with Higuruma, so I combined the useful with the pleasant!
6. INUOKKO
THEY ARE CUTE OKAY!!!! I AM OBSESSED WITH CREATING HCS FOR THEM!!! I don't consume much of their stuff, but all the fanart I've seen is cute and their participation in the itafushi fics I read is always welcome!!! It's kind of strange to read something where they're not together…
5. NOBAMAKI
MY OPINION HAS NOT CHANGED, OKAY??? NOBAMAKI IS WONDERFUL AND I WOULD KILL TO HAVE MORE OF THEM!!! But since I saw Nobara's flashback I've been wondering if Fumi wouldn't be a good ship too? Does anyone have a fanfic/fanart of him, by the way??? ANYWAY, NOBAMAKI IS STILL MY FAVORITE!!!
4. KIRAKARI
I'M IN LOVE WITH KIRARA!!!! SHE AND HAKARI ARE THE ONLY HEALTHY THINGS IN THIS MISERABLE MANGA!!!! I love imagining what their relationship is like, writing hcs slice to life minis and drawing Kirara! But I'm getting worried because I saw someone saying that Kirara could appear in the Hakari x Urame fight to help her boyfriend and I know what's going to happen and I don't want it to happen! GEGE GET THESE DIRTY CLAWS AWAY FROM MY BABIES!!!!
3. SATOSUGU
YOU RUINED BLACK AND WHITE FOR ME, YOU DEPRESSED BITCHES!!! My friend is obsessed with them and boy can I understand! These two are tragic, with a beautiful dynamic and a happy ending(?). Plus they fucked up my Christmas Eve. I hope these two bitches are causing terror in heaven!
2. ITAFUSHI!!!!
If you've known me for more than a second, you'll know that I have an average of five outbreaks a day because of these two. This whole thing about always trying to save others even if it condemns them destroys me, okay??? Fanfics and fanarts also feed me! And I'm going to convince all my friends to ship this too so I can yell at 2am at them about little details of their dynamic! AND THEY MATCH SO MUCH!!! Of course, no more than our first place!!!!
.
.
.
EVERYONE X THERAPY!!!
Please let the deaths stop and this become canon
Honorable mention for _ Tojikuna (more because a twt artist is obsessed with them and that rubbed off on me) _ Hainana _ Toji x Mamagumi _ Okkofushi (Yuta was Megumi's first crush and you can't get that out of my head) _ Uraume x Sukuna (one-sided) _ Yuta x Maki
#First place is what needs to happen the most!#like#I really want this to happen#two weeks without an episode and I'm freaking out already#itafushi#fushiita#satosugu#nobamaki#inuokko#shokohime#higukusa#higunana#chosoyuki#kirakari
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hi i read your article on fanfiction culture changing and it reminded me of a comment i got on a fic in 2023. (i was going to say this year/recently but then i checked and wow time moves fast) it was phrased like i wasn't ever going to see it. which is weird bc there were only 2 other comments both of which i'd responded to. it was written almost to an audience that did not include me. idk what that says about the "culture" but i enjoyed your article!
Aw <3 thank you so much! (If anyone hasn't read it yet, this is in reference to "The Endless Appetite for Fanfiction.")
That's super interesting, and definitely relates to this broader ~thing~ imo. My first thought is about the (significant?) rise in people putting fic reviews on Goodreads. That's definitely part of the overall context collapse—and deeply annoys me!!—but it does make me think about the concrit conversation, and how fandom post-LJ has largely shut down critical discussion of fic, which was not a rarity back in the day. (I'm not opening that can of worms now lol.) Like, I have sympathy for the Discord fic book clubs, because you should be allowed to say whatever you want about a fic in private! But I feel like that needs to be just one component, especially if you have a lot of positive things to say about a work.
Funnily, I got a comment somewhat recently that felt, at least in one bit, like it was addressed more to the world than to me. It was a really nice comment! But I showed it to a friend in my confusion (and then just replied like it hadn't struck me as odd). I've also received comments in the last few years on older stories in which the commenter acts like I've long departed from my fandom—when I've published new works as recently as a few weeks prior, and post on my (linked from my AO3 profile) tumblr daily. Which seems related, too—like, me, the fan, is still right there, very easy to see?
I do think there's something to be said about depersonalization across social media, and the way people collapse "content creators" with their "content" (to be clear, I'm not calling fic writers or fic either of these things, but part of this whole situation is that a lot of readers are thinking of them that way). Like, the creator economy is structured to encourage people do that, even. And of course there's great commentary here on tumblr dot com and elsewhere about how people talk to strangers in ways they'd never dare to in real life. I mean, the digital disconnect led to plenty of...issues...back in the day, even when fandom and fanfic weren't as bifurcated as right now.
Anyway, I think this is all swirling together...and like, it's not great! (Haha this is like how I ended the article. "This sucks! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯") But thanks again for your message—this topic has so many interesting, if depressing, facets!!
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Stranger | Chapter 2
Chapter Links: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]
TW: Descriptions of Violence, Mentions of Cannibalism
Tags: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x Atreides!Reader, Arranged Marriage, Eventual Smut (still not in this chapter lmao), No use of y/n, Original Characters, Canon what canon
Word Count: 2k
A/N: So... this was posted prematurely a couple hours ago. This is the actual finished longer version. If you don't know what I'm talking about, thank god. Sorry this took so long, lmao
Just letting you guys know that my knowledge of the lore is purely based off of the movies and the Dune wiki rabbit hole I fell into right after watching part two. I also took a few liberties with the canon here.
I'm super open to constructive criticism, or any criticism at all (feel free to absolutely roast me). Like I mentioned, I've never written fanfic before so I'd love to hear your thoughts!
The evening of your first day in Giedi Prime was celebrated with a banquet where you were introduced to the most important people on the planet. You've heard many stories of the ruthlessness and brutality of the Harkonnens, hence surprised by the courtly welcome during the dinner. Although you did your best to politely ignore the Baron who floated at the head of the table being fed by servants.
You were sat beside his nephew who, despite your mother's education, has evaded your insight. You couldn't quite get a read on him.
Feyd-Rautha whispers to you amid the buzzing conversations of the banquet hall, "are you enjoying the food, little hawk?"
You shoot him a questioning look.
"I like your hairpin," he sneers.
You resist from reaching to touch the Atreides symbol affixed in your hair.
"We don't see such ornaments often here." He quietly laughs in his devilish way, only too amused with himself.
Ah, you realize. He means to torment you.
"Seems early for pet names," you say, picking at your plate, "we've only just met."
"Oh, and yet we are to be wed in less than a week's time," his raspy voice rings in your ear, "I should like to be familiar with my future wife, Lady Atreides."
The marriage pact had been signed when you were only a little girl. Inheriting your father's inclinations, you swore you would uphold your duty, undeterred by the gruesome and abhorrent stories about the Harkonnens—because you knew that centuries of conflict could end within a generation with this union. You were a willing bride.
And yet.
You give him a smile that, to those not privy to your conversation, would seem genuine, "You know nothing of me, na-Baron."
"I should like to learn," you doubt his sincerity but care not enough to discern it. He takes a smug bite of a forkful of meat, "perhaps tomorrow, you shall learn something of me."
The following morning Iassa helps you into another black gown, this time with a veil in anticipation of the black sun.
"Is it not dangerous for Feyd-Rautha to wager his life for a show?" you question.
"The na-Baron is a skilled fighter, my lady. He will emerge victorious," Iassa is straight-faced as she drapes the veil over you.
"Yes, I do not doubt it, but given he is the Baron's heir. Does it not seem a touch irresponsible to even risk it at all."
Not that you actually cared for his life, you just expected that the Harkonnens would be concerned with the preservation of their house regardless of their brutality. You recall your grandfather who got himself killed fighting bulls for sport.
"The na-Baron will be fighting war prisoners. They will be drugged beforehand. It is perfectly safe, my lady."
"Oh." You couldn't decide if you were disappointed or not, "I see."
Iassa seemed intent on dropping the subject, so you do.
You stand before a mirror and take a look at yourself. It is impossible not to be reminded of your mother. She was never one for vanity, but you like to think there was a part of her that always enjoyed the elegant dresses she and you 'had' to wear. You allow yourself a somber smile behind your veil.
"You look beautiful, my lady," Iassa curtsies.
"Thank you," you look at her bowed figure, gray robes made more dull by the stark black choker on her neck. You were sure she was at least 2 standard years younger than you are and it had only been a few months since you came of age. You wondered if she liked pretty dresses too.
Before you can ask her, there is a knock at your door.
The house steward, Jaromir, clears his throat when Iassa opens it for you, "The na-Baron requests your presence before he enters the arena."
Heavy doors open for you in one of the chambers beneath the arena. You are greeted by the sight of a half-dressed Feyd-Rautha being helped into his armor by a servant.
"Lady Atreides," he looks you up and down, "I hope you slept well."
You bow your head in acknowledgment.
"Your knives, master," a large man whom you assume to be the bladesmith presents Feyd-Rautha with two daggers.
The young Harkonnen takes one and caresses the blade with his fingers.
"I've come to wish the brave na-Baron well before his fight in the arena," you say in false earnestness.
He smiles at your inflation of his ego.
"Though I must say, I am relieved it is all for show. I would not like to see my groom wounded before we are wed."
"For show?" Feyd-Rautha tilts his head and you see his arrogant facade show the slightest crack.
"Yes, I've heard your opponents will be drugged will they not?" your voice dripping with innocence, "to ensure your safety, of course."
His grip on the dagger tightens, "and where did you hear this exactly?"
You sense the awkwardness and tension in the servants. The one who had helped don Feyd-Rautha's armor has quietly retreated to the far side of the chamber. There is a subtle tremble in the hands of one holding a plate of towels. You finally notice the three women piled upon a raised platform glaring at you.
"Just voices around the fortress," you shrug.
A deep breath recovers Feyd-Rautha's smug expression. "Call for the warden," he orders one of the guards by the door, "tell him to prepare new prisoners. Sober ones."
"My lord, you need not endanger yourself," you feign worry.
"Nonsense." The na-Baron walks closer to tower over you, "My lady bride deserves to see my true prowess."
He sees through your challenge, but you don't care. Seeing his self-satisfied smirk wiped from his face for even just a second was worth it.
"Besides," he turns away from you to inspect the second knife, "my darlings enjoy meat that's fought for its life."
The three women sneer at this and you see their sharp teeth as they hiss amongst themselves.
You've heard of Feyd-Rautha's concubines long before you arrived on Giedi Prime. Tales of their taste for human flesh were one of the things that tested your resolve in fulfilling the marriage pact. You didn't mind that the na-Baron would keep other women. It would result in less of his attentions on yourself, you figured. It was their perverse appetite that nauseated you.
A look of revulsion hides behind your veil which you sense they would be all too happy to rip to shreds.
"I will see you in the stands, little hawk," Feyd-Rautha whispers to you as he waves for a guard to escort you out.
You do your best to drown out the noise of what seemed to be a countless audience that came to see the na-Baron fight. You could understand now why they uphold such brutal traditions. The people are so excited for it.
On the other side of the arena, you sense Vladimir Harkonnen watching you from the Baron's Box that towered over the whole arena. The blazing sun only helps you avoid looking in his direction. You were sat at a viewing box, still for nobility and separated from the masses, but much lower and closer to the sands of the arena. Jaromir had told you that you were to 'give the na-Baron your favor'.
Before long, the master of ceremonies announces Feyd-Rautha's entrance in Giedi Prime Speech. They are celebrating his betrothal to you and the union of Harkonnen and Atreides, you translate in your head. You wonder if the people care for the politics of the Great Houses. They seemed no less excited to cheer at your name despite the centuries-old blood feud.
Massive doors open as the na-Baron walks into the arena. His arms outstretched holding his knives like an extension of his limbs. He riles up the crowd as he walks towards the Baron's Box and kneels to his uncle. He then rises and walks toward you, smirking under the stark light of the black sun.
You may not fear earning the Harkonnens' contempt, but you were the Duke of Caladan's daughter and you knew that the favor of the people was invaluable.
You stand and walk to the edge of the viewing box. The glowing smile you reveal as you lift your veil draws cheers from the crowd that rival what Feyd-Rautha received. You produce a pure white handkerchief from your dress pocket and make a show of kissing it and waving the cloth at the buzzing crowd. You throw it off the edge and it floats toward the na-Baron who had moved both daggers to one hand to catch it. He looks up at you with what you think could be the seeds of respect and tucks the cloth into the tight armband around his right bicep.
He turns back to the audience and raises his knives in a war cry. The crowd explodes in guttural cheers and applause. Feyd-Rautha takes his position in the middle of the arena as his first opponent is released into the white sands.
You've heard of the Harkonnen heir's aptitude in single combat. It's time to see if the stories were true or if it was just another part of their menacing facade.
You were handed a pair of spyglasses to observe with. The two fighters approach each other, the prisoner wielding a knife of his own. Feyd-Rautha holds a taunting stance. The prisoner was sober, you were sure, but even without the spyglasses, you could see he was weak. You surmised the Harkonnen cells weren't very hospitable. He attempts a swipe but the na-Baron parries with ease. Another and the na-Baron dodges. Zooming in, you could see Feyd-Rautha's twisted amusement. He was toying with the poor man—and the people loved it.
The crowds cheered at the clashing of metal, thundering when the na-Baron drew first blood by slashig his opponent's arm. It wasn't long before Feyd-Rautha's dagger had impaled the prisoner's heart. There was no pause before a second prisoner was brought out to meet a similar fate.
Feyd-Rautha stood unwounded, seething with exhilaration. He enjoyed this; the thrill of killing. He basked in the roar of the crowd. You had never ended a life before, but some deep part of you could almost understand how he felt in that moment.
A third prisoner enters the arena. He looked older than the first two, bearded and taller. He reminded you of Gurney Halleck, the Atreides Warmaster. This man certainly wasn't at his prime but you could tell he would not go down as easily as the first two.
The warrior holds his blade out in a firm fighting stance, refusing to make the first move. You notice picadors in black suits have entered the arena, circling the na-Baron and his opponent. Feyd-Rautha lunges at the prisoner and a quick series of parries from both sides occur. You see the finesse in the na-Baron's movement. He recognizes his opponent's skill and he is taking this one seriously. You were not sure what you expected of the Harkonnen's fighting style but Feyd-Rautha was vicious but precise. The crowd gasps when the prisoner disarms one of the na-Baron's knives. The warrior manages to get a grip on Feyd-Rautha's armed hand and aims to pierce the na-Baron's neck with his blade. The na-Baron struggled against his hold and the arid air was thick with anticipation.
You were unsure what outcome you desired as you stared through your spyglass. Perhaps this warrior kills your betrothed. What then? Would you really be able to go back to Caladan's windy cliffs again? Return to the arms of your mother as if it were all a bad dream? You wonder if when Feyd-Rautha becomes baron, and you his baroness, could you convince him to let you see your family.
The warrior's blade was dangerously close to your future husband's throat when one of the picadors lashes at the warrior. The na-Baron growls at the offending picador as the warrior is weakened. Feyd-Rautha pushes him off and allows him a moment to recover, taunting him to try again. Blades clash once more and after a sequence of quick ferocious movements, Feyd-Rautha's blade slashes the warrior's throat. Blood made black by the infrared of the sun splatters onto the na-Baron. He licks the darkness that landed on his lips. Heaving, he takes your bloodied handkerchief off his armband and raises it to you and the roaring crowd.
You did not even realize you were already standing, breathless at the sight.
Chapter Links: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]
Taglist: @torchbearerkyle @austinswhitewolf @dreamlandcreations @emeraldsgirl @strawberryfieldsforevermore
#feyd rautha x you#feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha#feyd rautha harkonnen#dune#dune part two#baron harkonnen#baron vladimir harkonnen#house harkonnen#house atreides#giedi prime#austin butler#space-mango-company#fic: stranger
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ACCIDENTALLY YOURS !
WRITTEN PROLOUGE
—
" Thoughts on Balladeer? Well, he's okay.. but I think he's kind of overhyped, I mean all he has is his looks.. c'mon, lets be honest he wouldn't be famous if he wasn't good looking.. "
You said without any care, laughing at the chats reaction tons of debates starting up in chat, it was around 3am? a late night stream. You couldn't fall asleep so you decided to stream to your fans who were also up late at night, lazily playing the low quality game your viewers suggested only the sounds of keyboard smashing to be heard. You yawned, maybe it was the mood or the dim lights but you felt your eyelids getting heavier.
Yawning more, you apologized to your viewers saying that you were too tired to continue smiling at their goodnights and comforting words, you started lazily moving your cursor to click "End Stream," when, in your sleepy haze, you misclicked. A different tab opens up.. Your writing document, still open from earlier when you were editing the fic.
Except, this wasn’t just any fanfic.
It was THE fanfic. The fanfic you spend a total of 2 hours on every night to update to your small fanbase .. and the pairing? None other than Scaramouche, the very idol you just ridiculed on stream as “ overhyped "
For a solid few minutes, you stared in horror, unsure if you were dreaming or hallucinating. Then reality hit, and so did the panic.
" W- Wait?! No- No!! !" You fumbled for the mouse, your fingers shaky, eyes wide as you tried to close the tab. But it was too late. The chat had already exploded and damage has already been done..
Chat messages flew by at lightning speed..
h3izoufan: what.. what was that 💀
arcticmonkeyslover662: : LNFAOO WAS THAT A FUCKING BALLADEER FANFIC???
luumine_718: didn't you just say you thought he was overrated?? 😭😭
The chat keeps going, you couldn't even focus on a message before it disappears into the hundreds of others appearing
Your brain scrambled for an explanation, but the damage was done. You swallowed, looking at the screen into your chat.
" Listen. I- I was just.. I was just curious!! ," you stammered, your voice a higher pitch than usual. " Be serious, it's seriously just research?! I mean, everyone has read a fanfic once in their life— it's just curiosity! You guys are misunderstanding everything! " You said, eyes wide, stammering and a very, *very*, red face.
The chat wasn't buying it at all, having the time of their lives seeing you distressed
ree_1029: bro?? what research needs to look into " scaramouches smoldering gaze " 💀💀🙏 dpwm
yunjinslover: what the fuck are you writing LMFAOO 😭😭 ykw girl that's real tho can't even judge
Your eyes finally glanced at the page still open, horrified to realize just how romantic the scene was. There was no way of talking your way out of this one.
Just why did you have to write about his gaze multiple times?! Are you that fucking desperate?!
With a sigh and a very awkward laugh, you clicked out the tab. " Guys. I was seriously just practicing my creative writing skills. " You felt your face heat up even more as the chat continued the teasing,.
You sat there, staring at the chaos you had unleashed. The chat, a whirlwind of laughter, teasing, and judgment, was moving faster than you could process. Some were full-on laughing at your situation, others mocked and reminded you of your earlier comments, and a few seemed genuinely angry
You nervously fidgeted with your mouse, your face practically burning as you tried to figure out how to salvage what was left of your dignity.
"Listen… before you all go crazy, let’s not blow this out of proportion, okay? You guys are overreacting.. " you pleaded, feeling the words get stuck in your throat. " I've said it so many times, it's just creative writing!! " Your attempt to brush it off as a casual hobby fell flat, as the chat continued to descend into a storm of laughter and teasing, this has got to be the worst day of your entire career- not even career, your life!
yndefender: creative writing practice about ' his voice that compared to an angel's symphony ' ?? okay.. 🤔
You nearly choked on air, knowing the EXACT scene they were quoting from. Why did I have to write that part?? It wasn't even necessary in the plot! You cursed yourself internally.
As the teasing continued to flood the chat, the initial shock began to wear off, and reality hit you like a ton of bricks. You felt the weight of your earlier comments pressing down on you. Sure, you were putting on a casual front, but the embarrassment was still there..
“Okay. ” you said, your voice wavering a bit as you tried to regain some composure. “I think it’s time for me to end the stream before I embarrass myself even more. You guys are too much tonight.. overreacting so much for what.. "
The chat erupted in a flurry of reactions, with some pleading for you to stay and others playfully mocking your desperate need to escape.
realbeyonce3: nooo 🥺 don't leave dawg I still wanna know more about your thoughts on scaramouches smoldering gaze LMFAOOO
You could feel your face heat up again. “ Your all too cruel.. " Your voice was barely above a whisper, the shame creeping back in full force. “ I'm ending the stream.. it's already late.. "
As you scrolled through the chat one last time, you saw messages filled with laughter and teasing, but also support. Despite that, the overwhelming embarrassment felt like a heavy weight on your shoulders.
With a shaky breath, you forced a smile. “ Thanks for tuning in tonight.. Remember, it's just creative writing practice. ” The chat erupted again with laughter at your words.
“ Goodnight, everyone. I'll see you soon! Remember, just creative writing practice! ” you added quickly, your attempt at humor falling flat as you quickly clicked the “End Stream” button.
The screen showed the ended stream notification, and you exhaled deeply, slumping back in your chair. The laughter faded, but the shame remained, a dull ache in your chest. You could already imagine the videos that would circulate, you buried your face in your hands, feeling so nervous.
“ What the hell was I thinking.. ” you muttered, your face still buried in your hands as you tried to shake off the embarrassment. Recalling everything that happened, it was so. so. cringeworthy.
“ creative writing practice? Shit..” you whispered to yourself, trying to convince yourself that it was just a silly mistake. But deep down, you knew it was going to eat you alive for a while.
Putting your phone on silent and setting it aside on the counter you landed on your bed, looking up at the ceiling recalling every moment from that stream. Your face turned bright red again, grabbing a pillow and screaming into it as loud as you could. Violently punching the pillow until you tired yourself out and just laid there.. hugging the now messed up pillow as you started to feel your eyelids getting heavier.
" I'll just .. clear things up tomorrow. "
You thought to yourself as you finally fell asleep, falling into a relaxed state. Unbeknownst to you.. your phone began buzzing with notifications.. Wow. That's one way to go viral.
ACCIDENTALLY YOURS !
SYNOPSIS: You, a well-known streamer, have always kept your two hobbies separate. By day, you entertain thousands with your snarky commentary, but by night, you secretly write. fanfiction about your favorite idol, Balladeer. It was a guilty pleasure—until a late-night stream led to a slip of the tongue and exposed your secret to the world!
In a single moment of poor judgment and a misclick, which by the way was totally not your fault!.. I think.. clips and memes about you spread like wildfire! It was embarrassing enough for everyone to know about your fanfiction, but it spiraled down even further when they discovered you were writing about the very idol you constantly claimed was overrated.
Just as you wallowed in self-pity, a notification pings on your phone. A familiar username and a blue checkmark.
Oh.
accidentally yours master list // chap 1 ->
a/n: help!! I'm so embarrassed, I sincerely apologize if the writing seems horrible I'm still improving! Prologue is complete, really excited to start!
taglist:
@kaeuri @kazumiku @kyouzki @skyoverkill1 @eternallykira-143 @lalalaloveallmydays @simonisferal
#penelopeswifey#accidentallyyours#genshin#genshin x reader#genshin x you#genshin fanfic#genshin smau#self insert#smau#scaramouche smau#scaramouche x reader#scaramouche#kunikuzushi x reader#kunikuzushi#wanderer x reader#wanderer#social media au#genshin x y/n#scaramouche x you
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All the Drarry fics I have read and liked - Part 1
This is in no particular order; honestly, this list has no organisational method. I am only noting down the fanfics I've read and liked.
Grounds for Divorce by Tepre - Do I even need to say anything about fic? amazing fic. The emotions, the writing, the scenes. The angry Harry and the demure Draco. Ah! Love it.
Casting in the Dark by Flowerfan- Very cute post-war 8th-year Hogwarts story. Found it on Tumblr. The first time Draco, you know, experiences that with Harry, he doesn't even notice because Harry is that oblivious and apparently drunk. It's a cute read. (Another story - To the Beat of You - Harry has a secret and because of that does not stay the night at Draco's (his boyfriend's) place. Not a heartbreaking secret. Cute secret.)
Scenes of Surrender by Rasborealis - this story made me wonder if ever I will be able to give in to something or someone completely, just as Draco did in this story. A quick summary is that Draco is quiet and keeps his head down after the war. Harry cares that he is quiet and isn't speaking much. A mute Draco is common in 8th-year stories and this one is also nice. Anyway, Harry can't leave him alone (lol) and yeah. The way the author has written down scenes where Draco is surrendering is a piece of art.
Round Trip for One by Rasborealis - They are roommates and Harry is oblivious that he loves Draco. His innocent tries to get Draco to date better leads to fights and a very cute union. Would read again if I ever had a bad day and wanted to feel better!
9 times Harry kissed Draco and the 1 time Draco kissed Harry by aw_godusopp_no - Harry doesn't like that Draco uses swear words. He has a fun way to make him stop. Draco catches on, more like, Harry told him what he is doing and the one time, Draco actually does it on purpose to get Harry to kiss him. I love these 2 goofballs.
Say It with Flowers by SasuNarufan13 - Draco uses pureblood customs to court Harry. Harry is, like always, oblivious. (I love oblivious Harry). I couldn't complete it because got too sweet for me. But I still liked it a lot. Would read parts of it again.
knickers in a twist by technicolourbeat - I have already read it thrice. Draco wears skirts. Harry gets randy. Randy, randy, randyyyy boys. Love thissss!
The Standard You Walk Past by bafflinghaze - Harry has a sleepwalking problem and Draco just wants to repay his life debt. The author has a few other Drarry fics as well that are a good read.
Now I Wake Up In The Night and Watch You Breathe by hoko_onchi - Oh, it has unhinged Harry. Super unhinged but I still love it. Harry gets Draco because he wants Draco. Stalks him, manipulates him in a way? Read the tags, definitely. But if you love toxic love, this is for youuuuu! (This gives a lot of 'You' vibes - that Penn Badgley show)
Fantastic Flip Fuck with Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy! by hoko_onchi - Oh god, can't ever forget this fic. Such lovely, lovely written smut scenes. Both are p0r*stars and come together on screen. I said that and the author really meant it. Please read it. You won't regret it.
I will be back with another list.
Please read the tags before starting a story. all my love to the authors. Really grateful to them.
Keep writing, reading, and loving Drarry 🩶 💚
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Things you can comment on the fanfics you love when you have no idea what to say
From what takes less time to what takes more
~show those writers your love, please!! They do it for free T-T and they deserve better
1. Emojis
You know the vibe of the fic you're reading, chose the ones that suit it better.
❤❤❤
💔💔💔
🙈🔥🔥
You may think this is kind of stupid, but trust me, it is NOT for the writer. It shows you've read until the end of the chapter and that you liked it so much that you decided to say it publicly. Your presence means A LOT.
Also, leaving kudos or votes takes literally just 1 second, what are you doing NOT doing that?? 🤨🤨🤨
2. Simple phrases
I loved it so much!!
Can't wait for the next chapter!!
This was just so good 😍
Amazing as always, keep it up!! 🙌🏼
Writing is a lonely work if you think about it. When I'm in a writer's block, just one sentence can hype me up for the rest of the day and give me the spirit I need 💪🏽
3. The emotions you felt
Yes, you DO matter. That fanfic author cares more about your opinion than your stupid ex so you better write to them instead 🧐
The plotwist was so unexpected, I'm shocked 😱
You can't end with that cliffhanger, how am I supposed to wait another week??
Excuse me, I will now lock into my room and cry all night, thank you 💔
I've read some people saying they won't comment how they felt because they feel ashamed or shy. Take it as if you were about to post a tweet or comment on a friend IG's story 👍🏻
4. One piece of dialogue/prose that really amazed you
Oof 🔥 this happened to me a few weeks ago and that comment still lives in my mind rent free. There's no better way to compliment a writer's work than to highlight something they wrote that left a true impression on you.
And it literally takes no time:
[Insert piece of dialogue], oh she didn't just say that, imma throw hands 🤬🤬
[Insert piece of a description], I could really see it with my own eyes, loved how you described it!
5. Hopes and wishes for future chapters
C'mon, you're going to comment this anyway with some of your fandom mutuals or friends, why don't let the writer know that too?? COPY AND PASTE IT ✍✍
I just need Chatacter A and Chatacter B to kiss, how long is it gonna take?? 😩
Watching that scene in [Canon series name] would have been awesome!! Maybe in future seasons 👀👀
I hope [Ship Name] don't break up in the next chapter, they are so cute 😭
6. Character discussion
Okay, we're entering deeper waters here.
But the truth is: if you love that fanfic that much is because the characters really resonated with you. So express your first thoughts without any fear:
[Chatacter Name] is so important to me, like you have no idea. All the things they went through... But they still manage to be a better person ❤
[Chatacter Name] was so forgotten in [Movie/Series Name], I'm glad they're getting the development they deserved here!
7. Scene discussion
Again, you might think the comment section is no place to start "fangirling" over the stuff you liked. But IT IS!! And the writer wants to know your thoughts on their work, especially if your opinion is all positive 💞
This will take more time, sure. But if you're going to write it anyways for other people, COPY AND PASTE AGAIN, hon!
8. How this story is impacting your fan life (or even personal life)
You don't need to overshare, but simple comments like:
Your fic has really changed the way I think about [Character Name]'s decisions, I feel like I can understand them better now.
This story has motivated me to rewatch all the episodes again 😢 the nostalgia!!!
What you did with [Character's situation] was incredible! I've been there myself and I could have not explain it better 😔
... They will be the ones the writer will remember the most, I can assure you that.
9. A simple THANK YOU
At the end of the day, fanfic and fanart creators only have your feedback to rely on when the block or discouragement hits... This is about showing appreciation to someone you may not know at all, but that has brighten your day with their creations and efforts ❤
#fanfiction#fanfic#fan fic writing#fan fic stuff#fan fiction#fan fic author#fanfic writing#writing#creative writing#writers on ao3#writers on tumblr#writerscommunity#writers community#ao3#ao3 kudos#ao3 fanfic#ao3 writer#writers and readers#writer stuff#writer problems#writeblr#book writing#writers block#writer life#WriteWithMiri
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In regard to your 'dark logan' fic, why is it not marked more descriptively? I'm not trying to be mean, and I know you put warnings like 'dark', 'dubcon', and 'noncon' so people won't read it. But I feel like 'dark' and 'dubcon' are VERY different from 'noncon'. Personally, based on what I've seen and read, dubcon in fanfiction doesn't include any degree of noncon. Quote from a reddit thread that goes into more detail on the different types of consent levels typically recognized in fanfics; "1. stories where the characters' ability to consent is impaired and/or the power balance isn't totally equal, but they both enjoy the sex and are not traumatized by it (currently labeled "dubcon") 2. stories where the characters' ability to consent is impaired and/or the power balance isn't totaly equal, and the sex is upsetting and some degree of traumatic, but they DON'T recognize it as being non-consensual (currently labeled "dubcon") 3. stories with forcible rape where one of the characters is clearly not giving their consent and the other character knows it but they rape them anyway (currently labeled "'noncon')" link- https://www.reddit.com/r/FanFiction/s/o2xlRhpXtl
So why do you include dubcon/dark if there is noncon? Why not give more accurate warnings (like just putting noncon)?? I've been sexually assaulted multiple times throughout my life, and I will engage with dark or dubious consent fics on a regular basis, but they rarely have any events that are actually nonconsensual. And if they do, the author marks it very clearly and provides a way for readers to have a heads up and be able to skip the scene. It's literally only on Tumblr that I see these kinds of fics, and then the warnings are so vague/hint at there being some type of actual consent involved, and then the plot is just straight up rape. If it's just going to be rape, can you just mark it as noncon??? I know I'm responsible for what I read. But shouldn't you also be responsible in ensuring the very graphic and retraumatizing works you release to the public are marked with the most information possible in order to warn possible viewers with the most accuracy?
Idk, I'm just really tired clicking on stuff like this because the warnings/descriptors are so vague, and then having to deal with the fall out for however long it takes me to not feel retraumatized. I guess this is more of a word vomit of what's been on my mind ever since the Logan fandom blew up again, and these types of fics have been on my feed. Feel free to just ignore, thanks.
I give general warnings and they warn people that I do not offer a grocery list of warnings. There is a dead dove do not eat on every post shown below so I stand by my system.
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As a bilingual person who's been reading way too many fanfics with bilingual characters I reeeaaallly need to make a statement on how our minds work most of the time so people stop getting it wrong!
It's making me cringe so much 🥲
So I'm making a list of what I think is important to know when it comes to writing bilingual characters.
I've seen some simmilar posts on this topic, so some things might be repetitive but others are not, so stick with me. I'll be adding some personal examples to make it easier and more comprehensible.
So let's get started!
Master list to writing bilingual characters!
With no especific order os hierarchy.
1- This is the biggest mistake I see people making when writting bilingual character, so let's make this crystal clear: Bilingual people rarely mix their languages by accident!!!!
Especially if they've been living in a place where no one speaks their mother tongue and have little to no contact with their original culture.
Now, for the moments we do make those mix ups, it'll usually be with expressions we use all the time on our day to day lifes.
Let's work with examples!
I'm fluent in English, but my original language is Portuguese. In Portuguese, whenever someone is in a conversation we make this "éééééé" sound while we're thinking or unsure of what to say. It would be similar to the "uuuuhhh" people use in English.
I find myself and a lot of other Brasilian people saying "éééé" all the time even when speaking English, because that comes more naturally to us. It's an instict reaction that doesn't pass through the language shift that happens in our brain.
This also happens with more especific expresions. I don't talk to any foreign people, but when texting I catch myself trying to call people "amiga", which translates to "friend" and is normally used as an endearing term to call your friends or even strangers in a way to show friendliness. Now, not everyone in Brasil refers to their friends as "amiga", but I do, and I use it so much it slips in my vocabulary in English.
So, to summarize, there are expressions or words from our mother languages that come out almost as an instinct, but there usually aren't many of them and the frequency in which it happens is proportional to how much contact we have with speaking our native language.
2- Next up (and this is a funny one to me): it's easier to make math in our first language. If we were schooled in our first language, obviously. This could happen conciously or not.
So if you want your characters to have a funny moment, just have them do some math in their original language. This happens because we learned math and nurmbers in our mother language, and math is the same everywhere, so when we're learning another language we don't go through the same process with learning to use numbers practically like we do with words. So despite knowing what the numbers are called, it's still easier doing math in our language because our thought process is a lot faster and smoother in it.
3- We will revert completely to our mother language if we're emotional.
This could range from seeing a cute puppy and having a cuteness overload and instantly calling them cute pet names in our language to getting so mad that the only acceptable way to express our anger is to curse in our own tongue.
This sudden change happens naturally but they are intentional. We could totally curse and fawn in a different language but we choose not to because of the next point on this list.
4- Words are more meaningful in our own language.
I'll go straight to examples, because I know fic and romance writers are gonna have a field day with this.
When my dog was alive, I always talked to her in both English and Portuguese. But whenever I complimented her or told her I loved her in English, it felt fake. So I always repeated what I said in Portuguese and then I felt like I properly expressed my feelings.
So if i said something like "You're the cutest little baby in the world! I love you so much!" I always had to follow it up with. "Quem é a coisinha mais fofinha desse mundo todo? É o amor da minha vida? É, você é o amor da minha vida! Eu te amo mais que tudo nesse mundo!"
Only then did I consider she understood the depths of my love for her.
This also works in more angsty ways:
My parents were always very distant, so during one especific Father's day, when I was a kid, my school, as usual, had us making DIY presents for our fathers. We were supposed to write messages on the gifts and all my classmates were writing "eu te amo" on theirs. I couldn't write it, but it still felt like I had to or it would be weird. So I wrote "I love you" instead, because it felt less like a lie. Now, let's focus on the fact that I was a child. I had barely started learning English. I was nowhere near fluent. But it still felt easier to write "I love you" than "eu te amo". I never said "eu te amor" to my parents again.
Now, we had some fluff and some angst. Now let's get to humor!
Swearing always feels better in your own language. Do with that what you will.
5- On the subject of swearing, we will talk shit about anyone right in front of their face in a language they don't know and use different languages to mess with people.
This doesn't even need to be done with our first language (although it would feel more satisfying). Any language would do as long as the other person doesn't understand it. Bonus points if we get to do that with a friend/group of friends.
When I was a teenager I had just one friend that was also fluent in English. We used to talk to each other mostly in English for three reasons: the first one was obviously to practice, the second was to gossip with each other without people understanding and the third was so we could pretend we were foreigners and see people's reactions. We were two little shits that talked about the craziest stuff and no one bat an eye.
6- Now, let's finally look in the correct and conscious ways in which we change languages in the middle of a conversation.
First one and the one that happens the most is when we forget a word in one language.
I do this all the time and it sucks! I constantly forget how to say "concealer" in Portuguese and go around asking my family what's the translation even though no one speaks English in my house. I can't even remember the translation right now! A few days ago I couldn't remember how to say "pulseira" in English. It means "bracelet". It's an easy word. I still forgot it. Although I would recognize it if I saw it somewhere or if someone told me, my brain wasn't willing to do that work on its own.
So when this happens in real life, we'll always ask the people around us for the translation, even if they don't know the other language we speak, just in the hopes that they will understand the ✨ vibe ✨.
It's also really funny when this happens and the other person does speak both languages and also can't remember the translation. And sometimes we forget the word in both languages and have to resort to describing "the thing", which usually leads to a lot of misunderstandings.
Another way in which we change languages is when we want to use a very especific expression or memes in another language.
I'm gonna use Brazilian expressions for this because they're pure gold!
One that I find really funny (and somewhat family friendly for this post) is "o que o cú tem a ver com as calças?" which literally translates to "what does the asshole have to do with the pants?". If you think a little bit, you can still understand the meaning, but not all expressions work like that. If anyone's confused, the expression means that the other person is trying to talk about two different subjects that aren't at all correlated. You're basically asking "what does one thing have to do with the other?" with more crude language.
When we do this we can either just throw the expression in a different language and not elaborate on it, or try and explain it to the people around. It can vary.
7- If you have friends or family that also speak the same languages as you, you'll be shifting languages all the time without any warning.
I have a friend that most of our hangouts consist of watching K-dramas together. We live in Brasil, so we speak Portuguese, but we watch the k-drama in Korean and the subtitles are in English. During out binging marathon, we will speak all three languages with each other, even if none of us speak Korean. Sometimes we mix the words in all the languages, sometimes we have a full conversation in one language then switch to another on another point in time. Forgeting words in one language doesn't mean a thing in situtations like this. We'll just say the word in the language we remember and move on with the conversation.
This is everything I can remember for now. If anyone remembers other quirks of bilingual people, feel free to add on. If I remember more I'll keep adding to this post.
If you read all the way to the end, thank you and congratulations!
#writeblr#writing#writing advice#on writing#bilingual#bilingual characters#creative writing#writers#writers on tumblr#most of these come from personal experience#if you don't agree or have a different experience it means you're a different person#people can have different experiences in life#don't be an asshole
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Why Spuffy
Decided to put this here so I can find it more easily. Originally answered on r/Fanfic: What is your OTP?
Why? There are a lot of assumptions made about Spike/Spuffy fans. Like, we're just whores for good cheekbones. We're blinded by Spike's abs. We're all just abuse victims waiting to fall in love with the wrong person. And honestly, after 2+ decades of this nonsense, it'd be nice to just say: "read this then get back to me."
So. What is your OTP?
Buffy/Spike from BtVS. They've owned my heart for more than 20 years and show no signs of slowing down.
At first, it was the enemies-to-lovers thing. I've always been a sucker for that. Especially for a villain who turns to mush for a hero in the falling process. That is still true, but my love for them has become more nuanced the older I've gotten. I just turned 39; I fell in love with Spuffy when I was 17. What I love most about them today is that their history as enemies means they know each other better than anyone, have seen each other's faults, have done the worst things they could do to each other, and have a very honest, non-rosy view of their relationship. Spike is also the only man in Buffy's life (on the show; I'm not counting comics) who owns the hurt he's caused without making it her fault or imposing his view of things and convincing her he's right. He shows her that loving her doesn't always mean sacrifice or suffering, the way it was with Angel or Riley, but that she can make someone want to be better. And he also knows her well enough to know she will assume the responsibility of the soul he sought for himself (the most effective and tortuous sentence for the demon who hurt her), so he first tries to hide it from her, then encourages her when she starts dating Robin Wood that she owes him nothing, that she doesn't need to consider his feelings. It's the first time someone she's been intimate with has not been petty or jealous at the thought of her moving on. And because he has seen the best and worst in her, when he says he loves her, it's with a view of the whole person Buffy is.
And for Buffy, loving Spike is about loving herself. He was her outlet for her depression, a representation of all the bad things she thought about herself when she was at her lowest, and she punished him for that. She was conditioned to believe her friends' acceptance of her had strings attached. By Season 7, after she has come to peace with the worst thing she went through, she is no longer apologizing for herself or making excuses. She is unapologetically in charge. Loving Spike means loving the parts of her she always thought were ugly or twisted or irredeemable, going all the way back to how she carried the burden of Angel having lost his soul when she was a 17-year-old girl in love and had no idea what was going to happen. Furthermore, how she was made to feel responsible (side-eyeing Xander here; Giles and Willow get a pass but Xander was the most egregious offender). She also assumed the responsibility for her relationship with Riley falling apart even after he negged, gaslit, and cheated on her. Spike showed Buffy that she is not the problem in relationships, and allowing herself to love him meant an acceptance of self she struggled to find throughout the course of the show. In the end, after bringing out the worst in each other when they were at their worst, they learned to bring out the best in each other. It's just beautiful.
And that's why Spuffy, friends.
#spuffy#spuffy is endgame#spuffy fanfic#spuffy prevails because we're better#buffy the vampire slayer#buffy#spike x buffy#spike and buffy#spuffy meta
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Have I earned it, mother? Chp. 5
Pairing: Avis Amberg x reader
Summary: working at the studio was a hard affair for you, but for Avis who had no idea how to run it it was even harder. Coming to find out she has been staying late almost every day you decide to whisk her away so she can take a break.
Warnings: smut (+18), affair, swearing, oral (Avis receiving), fingering (Avis receiving), slight praise kink, pet names, tit play, lingerie, outdoors sex.
Authors note: First of all, I'm very sorry about what's going on in Los Angeles right now. It's truly devastating to see so many families lost over the rubble of what used to be their lives; my heart goes out to all of them. This chapter is for them, so we will never forget its beauty even if the flames consume it all. Hope will sprout from in between the ashes. On another note, I'm sorry that this chapter has taken so long, but I've had to slow down a bit, I couldn't keep up with the way I've been dropping fanfics. I'm not sure if the last part is any good, it's like two o'clock in the morning and I need to sleep but I hope that you like it and as always, be gentle but tell me If I need to be more graphic, if I'm lacking on something. I am here for you, my dear people, I listen. I also accept ideas that you might have or things that you might want to see Avis and reader do. Also available on Ao3. Finally, let's thank Patti Lupone for giving us Avis Amberg.
Shoutout to @bravewithacapitalb for being my beta reader for part of the story.
Chp. 1 Chp. 2 Chp. 3 Chp.4 Chp.6
Word count: 20K (I have nothing to say. I have tried and failed.)
Kiss me in a field of lavender
The tension had been palpable in the air all day, people whispering and gossiping about the newest production that Avis had green-lighted, quiet conversations happening in the canteen away from Miss Kincaid’s or Mr Samuel’s ears. Meg was in everyone’s mouths, and by what they were saying it could be a total disaster for the studio if things carried on like this, but you knew that Avis would not have taken such a leap if she wasn’t perfectly sure, but you had not had the chance to talk about it with her yet. Since that night at the hotel, you two had decided to spend more time together, one way or another. She needed you, not only because you were a magician and always knew how to relax her and make her forget with your skilled fingers and mouth, but because you would sit with her and simply listen. She vented to you all her frustrations, from how she felt about Ace and their life together to how the studio was running her ragged, the productions that they were doing feeling like they were utter shit. They didn’t make her feel anything but disgust and boredom, like they were wastes of time and money, missing out on all those wonderful opportunities to make the people see how the world truly was, to give the spotlight to all those minorities that deserved to be heard. Meg was a breath of fresh air for everyone, you knew she knew, and she was willing to take this risk for the betterment of the country, if it helped somehow.
Sitting in your tiny little office, eyes reading some documents Miss Kincaid had handed you perhaps half an hour ago, you could feel the exhaustion of the day catching up. Your sight was becoming blurry, the words dancing on the paper as you tried to follow the paragraph, your shoulders tense and your back beginning to hurt, muscles stiff and throbbing under your skin. It was a rewarding job, most of the time, but the extra hours you put in almost every day weren’t really necessary, in your opinion, though the mountain of reports and files that never seemed to get any smaller begged to differ. The clock on the wall chimed eight, and after one more try you just couldn’t focus on the document anymore, so you decided to call it a day, putting the pages inside a brown folder and leaving it for tomorrow, on top of the rest of files, the chair scraping slightly over the tiles as you stood. You hadn’t realised just how dark it was getting until you walked past your window, the sky blending the last strokes of purples and pink into a deep navy blue sprinkled with millions of tiny bright specks that glinted high above your head. On one side light still lingered, bathing palm trees and houses with the last few yellowy beams of the day, on the other side a blanket of night enfolding the world.
In the few years you had lived here it still amazed you how different it all was and how it felt the same each time you looked up at the sky. In the distance the streetlamps were beginning to turn on, the stars above dulled by the world down on the ground. Hollywood at night was always so full of life but you had never been too interested in partaking, even if there were times when you did go out and simply had a drink or two enjoying the atmosphere. Tonight, though wasn’t one of those nights; there had been too many meetings, too many conversations and phone calls banging in your head loud as bombs. All you wanted was silence, even if it was for a moment, an instant maybe. Tearing your eyes from the window to grab your coat you stopped mid-step, turning your head to see that Avis’s car was still in the parking lot. Yesterday you had seen it still in its designated spot as you were leaving at seven, and the day before when you had left at half past eight, but you hadn’t been sure if she was staying late every day or if this was a Meg-related thing. Now you were sure it was a normal occurrence, wondering how late she stayed each day before going home; if she went home. It was quite obvious to you that she was giving this studio more than it deserved, in your most humble opinion, but you also knew just how rewarding all this must be for her. A woman who’s never had any power at all, who’s been a housewife for more than twenty years, though that didn’t mean she had to run herself ragged just to fulfil this dream. Once again you tore your eyes from the window, picked up your coat from its hanger, and walked out of your office, locking it once you had stepped into the corridor. You didn’t even notice as the wheels of your mind began to move, your feet carrying you down to the elevator as if you were on autopilot, used to doing this little trek every day several times, but instead of pushing the ground button, you found yourself pushing the one for the first floor.
It surprised you for an instant, but then you realised you had been picturing you and Avis laying over green grass with a few sandwiches and sweet treats along with a bottle of champagne or maybe wine. It was such a lovely idea, and you knew you could wait until the weekend to do it at her place, make it absolutely perfect down to the smallest detail, but something told you that it should not wait. The door chimed as they opened to reveal the floor where the canteen and bar were, hoping that Avis would just go with the flow and trust you as you stepped into the corridor and down to the still open doors. A few boys were having the first drinks of the evening, others a bit tipsy already in a corner discussing heatedly something about a trip to Colorado in what they thought were hushed tones, but you didn’t care much. Approaching the bar, you waited until the man in the white uniform was done drying and putting away a bunch of glasses, signalling with your head that you were ready to order.
-Hi, James. Busy day?
-Not more than usual. I gotta tell you though that if you want something warm better be quick, Nick’s about to turn off the stoves for the day.
-Oh, then could you maybe get me, like, a few chicken sandwiches with lettuce and mayo and two cut up steaks? I would appreciate it. Tell Nick that potatoes are not necessary if he doesn’t want to add them, a Caesar salad on the side would work just as well.
-All that for you?
-No. I’m planning something, but I’m not telling you about it.
-You can trust me not to say a word Y/N. Who’s the lucky guy?
-Sorry, but it’s top secret. Can you give me a bottle of red wine, and some cut up fruit as well?
-Sure, just let me tell Nicky here. It’ll be a little bit, so if you want a drink while you wait…?
-No, I need to do something first, I’ll just come down when I’m done and pick it all up. Watch him with the salt though, I’m not eating another sandwich dipped in the stuff.
-It was April Fool’s, that’s all I can say, hun.
-Still, keep an eye on him.
He was a good guy, you had known him since the first day you had started working here, absolutely terrified of everyone but needing the money. It seemed as if it had been only yesterday when you first set foot in Miss Kincaid’s office shaking like a leaf, a young little thing that only wanted to impress her boss and to not get fired within the week. When you had gone down to the canteen to get yourself lunch you had seen him serving Mr. Samuels and in shock you nearly spilled your glass of juice all over the bar, but James had grabbed it just as your elbow was hitting it, saving the day, and the man’s suit. After that he had been kind and had gently guided you all through the building and the main events in your schedule so you wouldn’t have so much trouble getting through the day. He told you that you shouldn’t be that nervous, that Miss Kincaid was a real nice lady and you wouldn’t have any issues with her, which had turned out to be more than true. You owed him for that, and maybe one day you would be able to return the favour but for the time being he was more than happy to simply be your friend and a server at the studio. It paid well he said. Tapping him on his upper arm you turned away and headed back to the corridor, hearing his loud voice telling Nick about a special order as if it were one of those fancy restaurants you had seen down Sunset Boulevard.
The building was quiet, not as much as it had been that night you had shared with Avis, but the ambiance was far more relaxed than it had been in the morning, hearing your footsteps as you entered the lift, hitting the button for the top floor. In the back of your mind there had been a headache brewing, but it seemed as if the silence was soothing it, slowly vanishing into a gentle ache that maybe would fade completely as the night went by. One could only hope, of course. The doors chimed, opening with a quiet scratching noise to reveal a completely empty floor; not even Miss Stinton was at her desk anymore, having probably left an hour or so ago. Walking over the carpet your shoes made no noise, muffled as you made your way to those big oak doors, noticing how they were slightly ajar, the gentle light from the chandelier escaping and bathing the corridor in warm orange hues. Peeking through the gap you could not help the smile that graced your lips, watching Avis as she rested against the back of her chair, a pair of glasses perched perfectly on her nose, eyes moving from left to right as she took in the words written on the pages, rolling them and huffing every few seconds as if what she had in her hands was utterly disappointing. Her slender fingers with perfect manicured red nails tapped over the wooden desk in a monotone rhythm, the sleeve of her asymmetrical pink and black blouse bunched around her elbow, the fabric clinging to her ample bosom, although in her current posture, you could not see the way they rose and fell under the gown.
It would be marvellous to slip into this room, close the door, and have your way with her, making her pant and moan as you dipped to your knees, spreading her beautifully while sitting in that exact same chair, ruining the leather with each orgasm you could pull from her depths. In your dreams her screams and sweet hushed whines and whimpers would make your body shiver and burn, almost as if you could still feel her tender kisses on your skin, lingering, tasting every inch of you, her fingertips ghosting over your hips, under your jaw, it did not matter. Her presence was ever-lasting, overwhelming when you would wake up in the dark of your room, sometimes alone, sometimes with her beside you, her expensive perfume mixing with her salty essence in a perfect mix that filled your lungs and warmed your chest. You knew that once her husband recovered, if he ever did, all those late-night conversations, all those times you had driven her to your place, undressed her and simply let her sleep in your arms, all of that would go back to the shadows, hidden in every corner only able to steal glances whenever she went to the studio, only sharing her time and bed whenever her husband went away, whenever he neglected her and drove her to tears and her broken down body showed up on your doorstep. It was all a matter of time, you knew, but until that moment arrived you would savour every second life would let you have with her.
Slipping quietly through the crack you tiptoed in her direction, your heels falling onto the carpet softly so as to not draw any attention, your eyes watching her body language that although tense was also calm, focused on whatever garbage she was reading. Her presence soothed the ache you had not realised had settled in your heart since parting with her a couple of days prior, the last kiss still lingering on your cherry lips. Coming to stand behind her chair your hands traced the outline on the top, feeling the stiches under your fingers as you gently moved them to the front, coming to rest on top of her dress. The fabric was soft, the heat of her body seeping through the pink material as you gently began to move them up and down her shoulders. Avis had been so lost in her own world, the words written on the page swimming before her eyes in boredom as she let her mind wander through senseless ideas and wonderful memories, that she had not noticed you coming in, the feeling of someone’s hands on her shoulders startling her in her chair, jumping slightly until she caught a whiff of a perfume well known to her, that sweet berry aroma enfolding her completely as the sudden fear and anger at the intrusion melted away in an instant, relaxing her body into your touch. Her hat laid over the desk next to her purse, forgotten there since this morning, allowing her gorgeous ginger curls to be free and on full display, neatly pinned on top of her head and perfectly placed and soft under your lips as you landed a kiss to the crown of it.
-Hello, darling.
-Hi. – it was melodious to hear her relaxed gentle tone, every muscle in your body reacting to her voice as if she was enchanting snakes, your head coming to rest over her right shoulder, lips pecking the soft skin of her neck as the hand that had been holding onto the script let it fall on her lap, nails scratching gently your scalp, the other one removing her glasses and letting the fall over the desk. She hummed at your tender ministrations.
-I thought you would have gone home already.
-I wish. – without noticing her head lulled to the side, granting you better access as your lips moved on to that sweet spot under her ear before tracing the shape of her jawline, your hands never ceasing their rubbing on her shoulders, the hard knots palpable through her dress. - Ellen gave me these scripts to read at lunch time and I was just trying to get through the second one before going home.
-Any good?
-No. They really are shit, Y/N. No feeling, no art, there’s nothing here. I’ve read instructions on how to build shelves that made me feel more than this!
-I know, I watched “All Hands on Deck”.
-I told Ace not to green-light it, but he was adamant. – she was beginning to heat up in frustration, but your skilled fingers rubbing those sore spots relaxed her almost instantly, her head falling back against the leather as you pecked her cheek, her eyes closing with a contented sigh. -He said it was good, that it would do well, and it’s one of the worst we’ve made. Where are the meaningful stories? – the way her hands moved of their own accord, emphasising her words even as her body melted against your lips, was a delightful sight. She felt everything so strongly. - Where are the tears, the suffering, the love, the betrayals, the passion… This doesn’t show life, it shows fairytales that are not even that. It’s just crap.
-They are not Meg.
-They are not Meg.
-People are talking about it you know. A lot. Good things, bad things, in-betweens.
-I know it’s a risk but honestly Y/N, you should read it, you should see it. It’s a breath of fresh air and Camille is marvellous, probably one of the best we’ve ever had. – every fibre of her being was practically beaming with pride, her body turning the chair around so she could face you, forcing your hands to slip from her shoulders, but it didn’t matter if the prize was seeing those sparkles of pride in her eyes, the way they glowed as her smile grew bigger with each word. - If Ace saw it, he would be red with rage, but I stand by this.
-I know you do. People here think that you are a scary tyrant, they expect you to be like him, but you are nothing like that. You know this is the right thing, that this film will matter, that some little girl in a tiny village will see someone like her on screen and think “I can do that. I can be anything”. You are changing lives as we speak, darling.
-Many people don’t agree with you. More than a hundred theatres in the South have already written saying that they won’t show it and have pulled some of the other films as a boycott to try and get us to cancel Meg.
-But you won’t. – you knew that Helena Rubinstein made Avis’s skincare perfectly suited to her, but it still amazed you how soft her cheeks were whenever you placed your palms over them, your thumbs rubbing circles on her jaw before your fingers travelled to the nape of her neck feeling a few flyways that had escaped her perfectly coifed hair.
-Of course. I’ve put too much work and faith in this to pull it now. I might tank the studio but at least we’ll go with a film that will mean something.
-You won’t tank it; Ellen has already mentioned that you’ve sued Lawson, Daniels and McHadden for breach of contract and that there’s theatres in the North that have already assured they will have security so they can show it. People might hate it, but there will be millions who won’t. I have a feeling that this will only be the beginning of a promising string of movies made not by Ace Studios, but by you, Avis Amberg.
-You believe in me more than I do.
-It’s easy. – the red of her lips had faded somewhat since lunch time, her plump mouth calling your name, her eyes looking at you with such expectancy that it almost made you weak in the knees. You were tempted to bend over and claim them but for some reason you could not stray away your eyes from hers, so deep and wide, looking up at you without any barriers, no walls to keep herself hidden away from you. Your thumb traced her bottom lip softly not even smudging her carmine as you did so, but the action didn’t carry a sexual innuendo, as enticing and beautiful as Avis was, it was a simple caring gesture. - I know you and I know that everything you do, you do contemplating risks and prizes, rewards that will be at the end of the line. Meg is the start; it will be the hardest of them all just because of that, but once this one’s through, and I’m sure it will be, the rest will just fall perfectly into place.
-Assuming Ace lets me carry on with it all when he wakes up.
-If he didn’t, he would be a fool. There’s talent inside you Avis, there always has been but men are too blind to see it simply because one does not fall into their category of pretty or obedient. Ace will know just how good you are when Meg becomes the biggest hit this studio has ever produced. He won’t be able to deny that this success was all due to you.
Your words dug deep into Avis’s heart, burrowing and settling deep, almost feeling as if you were marking her very soul. She had been in the shadows her whole life; yes, everyone knew who she was and any time she set foot in a room she filled it up with her power and personality but whenever she returned home the halls were cold, silent, no comfort kisses, no sweet words murmured in her ear. She was a forgotten woman in her own marriage, and she hated it more than anything. She hated how insignificant Ace had made her feel all this time and how bitter it had turned her, self-conscious of her abilities as if she didn’t have the right to think she was made for something else than just staying at home. Every day of her life had been a miserable dance of biting words and fake smiles surrounded by an atmosphere of empty luxury until you waltzed in, and everything since that night had turned from a bleak void into something worth fighting for. She was unsure how you did it, but you did it anyway; you made her feel special, unique, as if she actually mattered, that she was worth a million dollars every day she woke up, every second.
Locking eyes with you she could see the truth that glazed them, the adoration and love seeping from every pore of your body and mingling with her skin, and like a teenager, she felt herself blush, a gentle smile painting her lips. You believed in her with every fibre of your being like no one had believed before and that meant more than all the jewellery and priceless pieces of art she had been gifted in more than twenty years of marriage. She would throw them all away if it meant simply hearing you say those words for the rest of her life. The script had fallen at her feet some time ago, but she hadn’t noticed, too lost in you to actually care. Her hands held onto your wrists, keeping them in place on her cheeks as she turned her head to place a kiss on your left palm, the red lipstick leaving an imprint that you didn’t want to ever part with. With the way you always responded to her every touch it didn’t surprise her with how much ease she could pull you to her, your body falling on her lap as each leg rested on her sides, coming to straddle her, your face barely a few inches from hers. Your brain barely registered the way your fingers were now playing with the hair on the back of her head, pulling pins here and there to let one single curl fall to her shoulder, twirling it gently, almost playfully.
-It’s not only me you know, there’s Camille, Ellen, Dick, Jack… There’s an entire studio behind this one.
-But you gave it the go-ahead. You trusted this story with the right cast, you took a risk that no one else would have done. This script is something, and you knew from the very beginning even if you didn’t think they would let Camille do it. This beautiful Jew I’m looking at will make history.
Her heart pounded against her ribs, her chest so full of love that she feared she might explode, her eyes blurry with tears for an instant, but she didn’t give you the chance to watch them fall. Her kiss was hard, borderline bruising even, and yet you could not pull away, her lips soft as her hands cradled your face. Your mouth opened of its own accord to grant her the access her tongue was begging you for, tracing the shape of your teeth and giving you the opportunity to scrape her lower lip, a rumbling moan sliding from Avis’s throat at the feeling. If magic truly existed you would have cast a spell so your body would be able to mingle with hers down to the last atom, feeling her completely under your skin, in your bones, in your blood, your minds dancing around in each other as a thin red thread built and wrapped around you both. To live as one even for an instant, not knowing where Avis ended and you began, so utterly connected that neither of you would ever feel alone, abandoned on the curb of some dark road without direction, would be as grand as letting yourself sink to the depths of the ocean with her hand holding yours, forever united. As your lungs began to scream for air she had to pull away, chests rising and falling fast, the sound of your breaths the only noise in that big office. Avis’s eyes were slightly dilated, and you would have loved to simply take her, she probably had the same idea, you thought, but she needed to get out of that studio, to smell fresh air and leave work behind, at least for one night.
-What would I do without you?
-Break records and that ceiling glass that keeps us from reaching the top. I’m not some miracle that has turned you into a new woman Avis; all that power and skill has always been inside you. The only thing I’m doing is loving you, showing you what I see so that you can realise it and see it for yourself.
-But you are a miracle, Y/N. Mine. – rubbing right under your lower lip she wiped your smudged lipstick with her thumb, her eyes moving from your mouth back to your eyes. There was a single streak on her right cheek where her tear had blurred her rouge slightly, but it didn’t seem to bother her, not with the way her eyes were glinting under the light of the chandelier as she looked at you.
-You are going to make me blush, Avis.
-Not a bad sight in my opinion. Your face all red and pink just for me. I wonder if I could make you red everywhere else. – her voice was all husky and quiet, whispered against your lips almost, sending a shiver down your spine as her hands settled on your hips to pull you closer. Perhaps getting out of this office was going to be harder than anticipated.
-None of that now, you and I have plans for tonight. Don’t get me wrong, I would love for you to leave all me red and bruised, but I think that what I have in mind in going to be a welcome change.
-Oh? Any hints?
-You are far too smart; you’d find out within a minute. Just trust me to take care of you and make this wonderful, okay?
-I would go anywhere with you, you know it, but right now, anything to get me away from these horrid scripts is more than welcome.
-And what are you going to do about them?
-Tell Harold and the other guy tomorrow to fix it or they’ll be out on the street by Monday next week. Ace might have liked these movies simply because they were money makers, which they are not now, but I’m running this studio, and I won’t accept this crap, not anymore. If they want to write shit like this, they can do it in the streets.
-Always so sure of your choices. They’ll learn soon enough that you have taste, but no more of that talk now. If we hurry, we might get to see the last few seconds of the sunset.
Removing yourself from her lap was a herculean task, her hands holding you in place with a harder grip than you had foreseen but of course, there was that lust in her eyes, that possessive tinge around her chocolate irises that was practically screaming at you to forget all plans and just ravish her right there. She would do anything to keep you close and yet your fingers let go of her hair, pinning that loose soft curl back before letting your hands slid over her shoulders. Her fingers wouldn’t let go as you stood, the tips still lingering over the fabric of your white flowy dress but as you took one step back, she was forced to let them slip slowly off your hips, though you didn’t leave her any chance of dropping her hand to her sides or over the armrests. Tenderly your fingers intertwined and with a surprisingly gentle strength, you pulled her to you, her heels landing quietly over the carpet. There was a childish curiosity in her eyes that thrilled you to no end; the fact that you had the ability to always keep her guessing without making her feel as if she was in the dark about what was going on in your relationship was a refreshing change from all those late minute invitations to parties or boring dinners that she had to attend with Ace without the chance of saying no. Rounding the corner of the desk Avis had to let go of one of your hands to grab her hat and purse, but she made no effort to place the first on her head, over her perfect curls. The people left in the building wouldn’t pay much attention to her and if they did take notice, they wouldn’t comment on of the fact that she wasn’t wearing it.
Grabbing your coat from the back of the couch you guided Avis towards the door, flicking the lights off and letting her push the heavy wooden doors close behind you. In the darkness of the office, next to the desk, the script remained forgotten over the carpet. Walking beside you, Avis chatted about how her day had been, the doors to the lift opened and you quickly pushed the button for the first floor once again. Avis raised an eyebrow at that, but you remained quiet, simply smiling politely at her, though a sneaky grin did make its way to your lips when you turned your face back to the doors just as the lift stopped. Stepping out Avis had to let go of your hand. She was getting better with the public displays of affection; a quick peck on your cheek, fingers touching but never holding, a hand on your lower back or yours resting on her upper arm, still she could not bring herself to hold your hand fully. She worried what people might say, how they might react, not towards her, they didn’t have the balls to even look at her when she walked past them let alone tell her off, but you were far more approachable and people could be cruel, not to mention that one slip up and your picture could end up on the front page of a magazine before she could stop it. There was an emptiness in your chest that you didn’t appreciate at all as her hand dropped to her side but there wasn’t anything you could do about it. Avis saw that sadness in your posture, a veil of disappointment shading your eyes, but it wasn’t directed at her. In an attempt to lift your spirits somewhat she looked at the door of the canteen and up and down the corridor to make sure that no one was looking or heading this way before she grabbed your face and kissed you gently.
Your entire frame relaxed into her lips, her palms warm against your cheeks and her fingers falling in between soft locks of hair that had escaped your braid and were now framing your face. When she broke the kiss, leaving you slightly dumbfounded, she was quick to wipe your once again smudged carmine, your neurons short-circuiting for a moment before you were able to function again. It was okay if the pecks were given while Ellen or Dick were in the room, or when Gertie and Mr. Breaton, the old man that worked at the gates of Avis’s house, could enter the room at any given moment, but a kiss so public was not a usual thing she engaged in. Thinking about it you realised that the only time you had kissed in a semi-public space had been on New Year’s Eve while you were still in the car in front of the restaurant, but back then many of the people in the streets were drunk, so they wouldn’t remember anyway. Kissing you at the studio in such a public area was a risk you had not expected her to take but the happiness it filled you with overshadowed the sadness of not holding her hand. With hushed words, you asked her to wait there as you turned and entered the canteen watching joyfully as James placed containers of food on top of the bar as Nicky handed them to him through the tiny window connecting the room to the kitchen.
-Just in time, Y/N!
-I couldn’t have done it better if I had timed it, eh? Did you leave Nick alone with the salt?
-Not for one second. – he had a bright smile, one of the things his wife loved the most he had told you one day when you first started having lunch there, apart from his plumbing skills, and he flashed you one full with teeth as he pulled out a mesh bag from under the bar and placed the bottle of red wine you had requested along with a bottle of champagne, winking at you. It was obvious you were going on a date but there really was no need for champagne, but you were not going to say no to the guilty pleasure you knew Avis had. From underneath the coffee machine, he pulled a wicker basket, placing it on top of the bar so he could start placing all the containers inside along with some cutlery and a couple of paper cups. – Nicky has added some roasted potatoes he had left from some dish or something, hope you don’t mind.
-No, not at all.
-Then that’s all, I think. The sandwiches, the steaks with some salad and potatoes, the drinks and the fruit.
-Yeah, that’s everything. Thanks a bunch, James. How much do I owe you? – you pulled your wallet from your coat pocket, but he shook his head and pushed your hand away from him.
-This one’s on us. We would have thrown the food away anyway. You and your secret love enjoy it; but don’t get too drunk.
-You know I never do. Are you sure you don’t even want a twenty?
-I’m sure. It was actually Nicky’s orders, and you know him, no taking back. Go and have fun.
-Thanks, James. See you tomorrow. Bye, Nick!
From the tiny window the face of a big man with beady blue eyes popped out, his deep rumbling voice wishing you a goodnight as you picked the basket and the drinks, waving back to them both. When you stepped into the hallway Avis wasn’t anywhere to be found, a sudden fear that she might have stood you up, leaving you looking like an idiot with all that food, or that someone could have come and given her some news that had required her to leave, assaulting your mind as you headed one way of the corridor looking for her, but when you reached the ending of the foyer she wasn’t there, so you turned the other way. The despair that had bloomed just a few seconds ago growing exponentially. Rounding the corner your eyes caught a glimpse of a pink dress, registering after half a second her frame leaning against the wall, next to a window smoking a cigarette. A relieved breath escaped you, drawing her attention. She wasn’t the sort of woman that would leave like that, you knew so, but you had had partners that had behaved like that or even worse, making you wait for hours in a restaurant until closing time, drink after drink filling the table as you had cried in silence, and maybe, you thought bitterly, some of those issues were still lingering inside you. It made you feel quite bad the way you had reacted, as if you didn’t trust her enough, as if you believed her capable of doing such a thing when you knew perfectly well that she would never hurt you like that. Releasing the smoke she had inhaled, Avis noticed the fear in your eyes, the way you clung to the basket and the mesh bag, her body suddenly completely alert and rushing to you.
-Hey, are you okay? Did something happen?
-It’s nothing. I’m fine now, let’s go.
-Y/N, talk to me. – she flipped the butt of the cigarette out the ajar window before placing both hands on your forearms, thumbs rubbing circles through the fabric of your coat and dress. - You know you can trust me.
-You are going to think it’s stupid, which you wouldn’t be wrong about, to be honest.
-I promise I won’t. Did someone say something? I will fire them immediately.
-No, no. I just didn’t see you when I came out of the canteen and… I thought you had left.
-Oh, doll, I wouldn’t leave you without telling you and if I had to, I would take you with me if I could.
-I know. It was just my mind playing tricks on me.
-It’s happened to you before, hasn’t it?
-A few times. I know that you would never do something like that but for some reason, I thought you had. Which makes me feel really bad now.
-Don’t feel like that. – the carpet all of a sudden seemed the most interesting part of this entire hallway, but Avis didn’t let you keep your glance downcast, she placed her fingers under your chin forcing you to look up at her. It struck her hard how vulnerable you looked, how much like a scared child you seemed to be with those sad eyes, and she internally cursed about how little she actually knew about you and your past, only a few snippets here and there. Your love life was not something you divulged or talked about while Avis’s conquests were well known to you, and she couldn’t help but feel as if there were pieces of you she still had to find. But she knew that the only thing she had to do was ask you for them and wait until you were ready to hand them out. - You are the best thing in my life, Y/N; I won’t ever leave you. I would never simply walk out on you when you go to such lengths to make me happy, going out of your way to grant me wishes I didn’t even know I had. Don’t ever doubt my love for you or how much you mean to me.
-I don’t, it was just a moment when my demons took the best of me. Relationships like this are still something relatively new to me, but we’ve been through too much for me to lose my trust in you. Still, I appreciate your words Avis, truly. I’m fine now, let’s not let this ruin our plans.
She needed to make sure you were a hundred percent okay, to know that this wasn’t deeper than you were letting on. With a gentle grip around your biceps she stopped you before you could turn away from her, bending to kiss you tenderly, pressing her forehead against yours for a few instants. Just as she didn’t know how you did it, how you made her feel this way, you weren’t sure how she managed to always make you feel safe, protected, and cared for, as if her hands could shield you from every single horrible thing in the world and keep you both inside a bubble where nothing bad could ever happen. Where she could love you forever and always. The heat her body expelled wrapped around you in the silent corridor, the sun casting waves of pink behind Avis in gentle halos that bathed her frame as you separated slightly, the pastel colour moving around her as if a painter was applying brushstrokes all around. Without a word she took the mesh bag from your right hand, intertwining her fingers with yours, and pulled you back down the corridor until you stood in front of the lift once again. No one was there to see you, no one would have cared if they had, and a little bubble of happiness enfolded your heart as she never let go of your hand, not even when you both stepped out onto the ground floor and headed for the front doors to set foot out into the world.
It was a small gesture to show you just how much she truly loved you, a promise that she wasn’t leaving you even if the universe fell apart. You couldn’t truly understand why she was so against holding your hand in public, after all she had been seen touching your back or your arm, even with her hand on your shoulder, your bodies never more than a foot apart from each other. You were even sure someone must have seen her kissing you on the cheek at this point, and yet she still drew the line at holding hands. But despite it all she was crossing the hall knowing that the few people left would see, her action a statement to you but mostly to herself that you were far more important than gossip or a few pictures. You were her friend, her partner, her therapist, her doctor, anything and everything, and if she could have had it her way you would have been her wife already. So, if people wanted to talk, let them talk, they were bound to find something to gossip about anyway, and she wasn’t going to push her happiness to the back of her mind and heart anymore, nor yours. Her grip was strong but never painful, the warm breeze that greeted you both as you stepped out of the building carrying a soft aroma of the first flowers that were beginning to bloom, perhaps a bit early, but nevertheless beautiful in between the deep green grass and moss. You walked to the parking lot and towards her car, but you quickly pulled her arm in the direction of yours, meeting a raised eyebrow.
-I know a place that you will love.
-You don’t want to have dinner at home, in the garden maybe?
-I would love to, but you need to see this spot, believe me. Come on, I won’t crash the car or anything.
There it was, that melodious loud laugh of hers that made your every limb tingle. It rang as clear as glass, echoing ever so slightly in the nearly empty parking lot, and you could not help but join her with quiet chuckles as you pulled her to your Packard. You met no resistance whatsoever and made quick work of the basket by placing it in the trunk along with the drinks that Avis kindly handed to you. Whatever you had planned was bound to be good taking in account the bottles she had taken notice of; an expensive bubbly that she adored with its fruity aftertaste and its smooth flavour, and a rich, slightly sweet red wine that she had every once in a while with her meals, never on its own, and that was a perfect companion for meats and desserts. Just before you closed the trunk Avis caught a whiff of the delicious aroma of roasted potatoes and gravy, her stomach rumbling quietly as she realised just how hungry she was, not having had a bite since lunch time, only coffee and a glass or two of whiskey to keep her running.
Being out of the office was already doing her some good, the tension in her shoulders slipping down her arms as she rounded the side of the car to get into the passenger’s seat but not before closing her eyes and simply taking in a deep breath of fresh air, the last few beams the sun cast down onto the ground warming her face. An instant later she was settled beside you. The car already smelled liked you, that precious berry perfume that you sprayed on each morning clinging to the leather in transparent rivulets that filled Avis’s lungs as you turned the engine on and began to back out of the spot before heading to the gates, the comfort of it making her relax in her seat, resting an arm on the back of it and using her hand as a perch for her head. With her cheek on her palm, she was able to take you in, never tiring of simply staring at you. It felt as if every time her eyes landed upon your perfect face, she found a new feature she hadn’t seen before, like tiny little freckles on your high cheekbones or a beauty mark on the tip of your nose that was almost invisible unless the person was extremely close to you.
But the ones she had engraved in her memory were the ones she loved to take in again and again. She adored the way your full lips curled inward just a bit when you smiled, the way your cheeks dimpled ever so slightly, or how you scrunched your nose when you were concentrating on something. Every little aspect of you was like a wave of mint in her veins, overwhelming and overpowering the rotten stench of her life before she met you. She knew that you were young, younger probably than most of the boys she had had at the gas station, but you were far more mature than any of them and there was something so utterly intricate and beautiful in the way you always seemed to find joy in everything and everyone. She had no desire to destroy all that wonderful happiness that you carried with you wherever you went. People like you are what was needed in this world, and she hoped you would never ever lose what made you so special, so unique and interesting to her. You weren’t some passing fancy though, no, she had had plenty of those in twenty years and it had always ended quickly and messy; with you, it was something true and real and she wished to never be parted from your side until her last day on this Earth.
The sun would set soon over the horizon; you had lost too much time at the studio you thought, but you weren’t about to be a driving hazard simply to get to that spot you knew, to risk both your lives for something that you could go up to the rooftop of the building and watch while holding each other close. If you got there in time, it would be wonderful but if you didn’t it was perfectly alright as well, as long as Avis was happy with what you had arranged in the five minutes it had taken you to leave your office and to go down to the canteen, you would be content. Swerving the car onto the freeway you rested comfortably against the back of your seat, watching from the corner of your eye as Avis turned the dials of the radio until she found a song she liked, returning her head to its previous position over her hand, her feet tapping to the rhythm while humming. There was a gentle tug on your coat, and you looked down for a moment to see her free hand playing with the hem of it absentmindedly, moving her eyes between you and the road ahead every couple of minutes. Those deep chocolate irises observing you, drinking your every movement, made you blush like a schoolgirl, cheeks and neck turning a pale pink even though her touches were nothing but harmless twirlings of the fabric in between her fingers, her skin never brushing yours as to not make you lose concentration on the road.
The spot you were driving to wasn’t really that far away, but the secondary roads were a nightmare to get through and Avis was about to find out as you took the exit that pointed out Runyon Canon. She sat a bit straighter when she saw the sign, dropping her hand to her side, and turned her head to look at you with a raised eyebrow. She hadn’t personally been there but the boys at the studio had mentioned that there were a few nice picnic spots with tables and everything, and as much as she liked the idea of having one with you she was also slightly disappointed that you had decided on some place where there would no privacy whatsoever. She liked being alone with you, no families with screaming children or passersby that would go climbing early next morning, she wanted it to be just the two of you, but she wasn’t going to voice her opinion. You had done things for her that no one else had, she could go through this for you. The first pothole got you both off guard as the light began to dim, your foot slipping from the brakes a little as Avis fell slightly on her side, having to use her hands to stabilise herself on your arm and shoulder. A curse echoed in the cabin of the car as she tried to sit back on her side, but the bumps were making her slide off the leather due to the fabric of her dress and without a second thought she pulled the black skirt from under her thighs hoping that her bare flesh against the seat would help her stay in place. Of course, you had not been expecting that and when you turned your head to see what on earth she was doing you were hit with the sight of the fabric bunched up around her hips, those shapely and delightful legs displayed in nude stockings before you, and oh God, those voluptuous breasts of hers were practically spilling out of her skewed blouse. Without thinking twice, you braked in the middle of nowhere, a cloud of dust enfolding the car, Avis’s body jerking forward before falling back against the seat.
-Y/N! A little warning next time. Is this where you wanted to take me? I’m not saying that it’s not pretty honey, but…
The words were drowned by your mouth on hers, the hand brake nearly forgotten in your hurry to get your hands on her body. You had been fighting hard against your better judgment, but it seemed that you had lost, though you could not say you were saddened by it, not when your hands were holding onto her hips under all that bunched up fabric, digging your fingers hard on her hot flesh, lips on lips pushing her back against the seat without realising it. Avis had not even thought of the fact that she would be half undressed in your presence and your reaction was perhaps a bit too forward for her at first, mainly shocked by it, but she wasn’t about to complain when she had been craving you all day and hadn’t had the chance to have a quicky in her office. When she parted her lips to grant you access, she was pleasantly surprised by the force with which you sucked on her tongue and bit down on her lower lip. The moan that resonated from her making her entire body vibrate, her hands digging hard into the leather to keep herself upright. Just as suddenly as you had assaulted her mouth you separated, eyes filled with such lust Avis thought she might drown in such passion, your body hovering over hers.
-If you want to actually get to the spot and have a nice date with me, I suggest you cover those legs or I’m going to bury myself between them and not let you out of this car until tomorrow morning.
-That’s not a bad prospect darling. That mouth of yours is quite talented.
-God Avis, I’m really trying here to not fuck your brains out, help me out, will you?
-Why would I? – her body pressed against yours, that delicious heat seeping though your thin dress as one of her hands lifted from the seat to rest over the one that was on her right hip, making it travel in between her legs until your fingers were barely an inch away from her centre. She was always warm, hot against your skin, but God, she was burning in between her legs, and your fingers could not help moving closer until they brushed the soaking lace. Avis’s head fell back at the contact, a groan filling up the cabin as you moved slowly up and down. She was absolutely drenched; this couldn’t have been just from now.
-You’ve been fantasizing about me have you not?
-Hmmm, yes. – a gasp escaped her when you pressed your thumb to her clit through her underwear, eyes rolling briefly to the back of her head. - Reversing roles, are we?
-You seemed to enjoy it the other day. – scrapping your teeth on her neck, Avis felt as if she might combust right there and then, your tongue licking the soft skin before your lips made their way to her ear. - How about we make a deal? You let me take you to that spot and we have a nice date, and I might be tempted to ravish you later. But only if those legs remain covered.
-Where are you taking me? – your hand stopped its motions over her centre, a quiet whine parting from Avis’s lips as she locked eyes with you, but your hand didn’t move from its spot on her inner thigh, ghosting over the flesh and drawing goosebumps and shivers that made her ache even more for you.
-I ask the questions today darling. Deal or not?
-Deal.
She could not lie, the prospect of you fucking her out in the wild with people barely a few feet away, hidden by trees or one of those big picnic tables, set her on fire and this whole act of her belonging to you, that possessiveness was just fucking amazing. Like the well-behaved lady she was she pushed as much of her dress as she could over her thighs, pressing them together without thinking to gain a bit of friction. Your body didn’t move away from her quiet yet though; the hand that had just been in between her legs when up to her collar, feather-like touches making the air in her lungs hitch, feeling how it moved down her sternum and over her breasts, bending your head until you could lick the swell of her left tit before you pushed yourself back into your seat leaving her absolutely flustered. She had taught you a trick or two on how to toy with people, and you weren’t about to waste this opportunity. Pushing the hand brake down and shifting into first gear the car began to move again, the potholes and bumps not helping Avis’s situation in the slightest, but you weren’t much better either, with the way her bosom jiggled and bounced you were actually finding it extremely hard to keep your end of the deal.
Finally, and you did send a prayer to the heavens for it, you saw the entrance to Runon Park and the designated area for picnics, but just before reaching it you swerved the car to the left and followed a slightly covered path for a mile or so, the trees tall and dense around you but allowing for the very last beams of light to still come through them, illuminating the way. Avis’s breath caught in her throat at the sight when you drove past the last tree, coming into a secluded clearing. All the lust and fire moved temporarily to the back of her mind as she took it all in from the way the canyon dropped into a deep abyss barely six feet from where you were parking to the vast green that seemed to go on into the horizon, endless and absolutely breathtaking. This… this was better than what she could have ever imagined. Without thinking, without command, her body stepped out of the car almost as if she was suddenly living in slow motion, the skirt falling around her legs properly, but she barely registered it with her hand on the warm steel of the hood, each step she took crunching twigs under her heels. How had she lived in Hollywood for over twenty years, and had never been here? The warm breeze caressed her face, its waves carrying the fresh aromas of pines and wood that melted against her skin as the floral accents from the very first violets and snowdrops danced around her in a harmony of fragrances that filled every cell in her body.
Under her feet deep emerald green grass grew up until the very edge of the cliff and in a need to see she stepped forward until she was barely a foot from it, the abyss deep and terrifying but so stunning that she could not feel fear. Looking to the West a waterfall burst from the rocks, its waters strong and transparent as they poured and fell down to the valley more than two hundred feet beneath her, where a river of powerful currents and acute meanders adorned the scenery, the sounds the wind carried kissing Avis’s ears in sweet gurgles and murmurs of water that filled her heart with such emotion that she could not even comprehend what she was seeing. Every tree, every rock and bush were placed almost strategically as if God had taken his time with this spot only for you both to see. She could not understand how the plateaus where she stood along with the one across the valley were so full of green, trees as tall as buildings gracing the world with a rainbow of greens and browns as they grew, while beneath them rocks as red as fire stood, the careful lines and topography of curves, columns and arches contrasting with the weeping willows and fragile riverbend plants that grew in between the rivulets of bluish crystal waters at the bottom of the valley. Looking down to the East the world was a song of fire, the canyon going on for miles with both gentle curves and acute angles that would have been hidden under seas of green had the river not carved its path deep within them.
Avis couldn’t steer her eyes from it all, observing the way the leaves swayed in the breeze, white butterflies dancing tenderly between the petals of white daffodils and red poppies, the splatters of colour spread throughout the grass in mosaics. There was a ruffle coming from some bushes across the valley, and Avis watched intently as a deer walked out into the evening sun, standing tall and proud with its growing antlers close to the edge as it almost held her gaze, its magnificence making her wonder if she had ever seen one in the flesh. Crossing the streaks of blue that still remained in the skies above, eagles cut through the winds, wings spread wide as their loud calls accompanied the flow of the waterfall. Her eyes had never seen such beauty; the world had always seemed like such a fast paced universe to live in that she had never taken the time to simply stop and step aside from the current of people, but standing here, where nature seemed to carry on without noticing humans even existed, was as if she was seeing her home for the first time, and she could only think about how beautiful it all was. There were eagles nowhere else but on this planet, bees and dragonflies could only buzz and sway over rivers and fields of daisies in this planet the same way that roses and pine trees could only grow and thrive here and she had never realised it until now, when the world was quiet and society laid miles away.
A pair of hands came to lay on her waist, startling her ever so slightly before they wrapped themselves around her as your head rested over her shoulder, and in murmured words you told her to look over to the waterfall. Her head returned to the West slowly, unsure of where her eyes should be, but upon landing them on the spot, both of you watched enthralled as the sun began its last descent. The sky was dressed in thin veils of pink and purple silk before the last golden glow of the day bathed the earth, it’s warmth melting against Avis’s face, only disturbed by the elusive touch of green beams that only a few handful of people had ever managed to catch, its perfect light turning the red sandstones and crystal waters into a world of molten gold and emeralds before it all turned dark and the sky above began to blend its indigo blue into a deep navy one. High up in the sky was now a full moon, lighting the world with white rays as to not leave it in a deep terrifying darkness, all the animals vanishing from the land to return home while others woke up to start their day. The world had turned silver.
-Was it worth the wait? – your voice whispered in her ear as your hot breath sent a shiver down her spine in a reflex response to your touch.
-Words cannot describe it Y/N. This place… how did you find it?
-When you are lonely and homesick you try to find places that bring you comfort, that make you feel as if you’ve never left. I found this one in one of those moments. I had been driving my old car around, getting familiar with the roads, and I took a wrong turn that turned out to be a right one.
-It’s beautiful.
-It was beautiful, now that you are here, it’s perfect.
Romance had seemed such a soppy affair, with all the compliments and shows of affection and love, but by George, was Avis absolutely adoring it all, red as a beet at your words and so very thankful that it was night, and you could not fully see it. Her hands were resting over yours, rubbing and gently moving her fingers over your soft skin as you both remained standing there observing it all, taking in the scenery for a moment or two. The waterfall seemed to have slowed down its incessant pour, the water falling gently from rock to rock, the once bright green moss now reflecting the moonlight as if they were diamonds framing the silvery currents, the grass vast seas of white as the breeze moved them from side to side. She could stay here forever, build a small wooden cottage and live with you, hidden from the world, not having to worry about whether people would approve of you, the doctors unable to call her and remind her that she had a husband in a comatose state, no Meg to think about, no studio to run, just you, her and nature. A most wonderful dream indeed. With a deep breath, the pine fragrance filling her lungs, she felt you turn her around, an astonished gasp escaping her parted lips when she saw a checkered blanket over the ground along with the basket and the mesh bag, a turned-off lantern resting on the side. You were quick, she thought, or maybe she had been truly lost in her surroundings, either way, she was pleasantly surprised by it all and let you guide her to the makeshift dinning room.
Your heels came off, resting on the side, away from the blanket, and in a similar manner Avis removed hers, letting her body fall as gently as she could onto the ground, tucking her legs under her while your flowy dress covered your crossed ones. It wasn’t supper by candlelight, but at least the lantern gave enough illumination when you turned it on, with the lighter that you had picked up from Avis’s purse, that you wouldn’t have to bring the fork an inch from your face to see what on earth you were biting on, the mesh bag falling onto the grass as Avis pulled the bottles and left the champagne over the blanket to work on opening the wine. You both worked in silence, containers resting in between you before you began to remove the lids, the wonderful smell of roasted potatoes covered in gravy and steak surrounding you both while the coolness of the sandwiches remained on the side, a big bowl of Caesar salad in the middle so you could share. Putting the fruit back in the basket so they wouldn’t be in the way. The cork of the wine came out with a pop, Avis pouring the deep cherry liquid into one of the paper cups and passing it to you before serving herself, raising it in the air.
-Cheers.
-Cheers. – it was utterly delicious. You were not much of a wine person if you were being honest, you were perhaps more modern or glamorous, always ordering cocktails, but the fruity aftertaste it left on your tongue was magnificent, simply delicious and lifting your eyes from the cup you could see Avis was enjoying it just as much.
-So, what’s on the menu for dinner tonight?
-We have Nick’s special, of course, steak with potatoes and salad, and on the side some chicken sandwiches because I was not very sure what you fancied. Maybe I went a little bit overboard, but my grandma used to say that it was best to have leftovers than to leave hungry.
-Your grandma was a very wise lady. Should I go first and try the salad?
-Whatever you desire, etiquette is not compulsory here, darling. – picking up her fork she stabbed a piece of chicken practically drenched in the dressing along with some lettuce and using her left hand as a barrier so the food wouldn’t satin her dress should it fall, she popped it all in her mouth. God, it was delicious, the lettuce crunchy and fresh, a crouton she hadn’t seen shattering in her mouth in a perfect balance of salty as the parmesan melted on her tongue along with the juicy chicken, her starving stomach taking it all as if it was a heavenly meal. She probably hadn’t noticed but she had moaned loud and clear, eyes briefly closing as she let the simple flavours assault her, but you had, and you could not say whether you were happy she liked so much or far too bewitched by her that even the slightest noise was music to your ears, as if you were listening to the London Philharmonic, a chuckle escaping your lips as you took some of the salad yourself.
-God, I can’t remember the last time I had something like this.
-If you are reacting like that to just the salad, I’m worried the potatoes and gravy will kill you.
-I’m not. You know how to resuscitate me with that tongue of yours. – she had said it with such a nonchalant tone before bringing another bite of the salad to her mouth that you chocked on your wine, a splatter or two landing on your cheeks. One point to Avis she thought, watching your flushed face as you wiped the specks of deep red liquid from your skin, a naughty smirk painting her lips that’s she hid quite well behind her own cup of wine. – Are you alright? Did something go down the wrong pipe?
-Don’t act as if you didn’t just almost kill me, but yes, I’m fine.
-Me? I haven’t touched you, honey. I think you know very well when and how I could send you to the heavens… or hell, whatever you prefer.
-Are trying to seduce me?
-Is it working?
That raised eyebrow was such a turn on for some reason, but Avis didn’t move from her spot, simply bent over to stick her fork on some of the steak, doing the same motion with her left hand as before but your eyes were clearly staring at another part of her body that wasn’t her face. You would have to get professional help to understand why you were so goddamn in love with her breasts; what sort of magic did they possess to make you shiver and burn at just the simple sight of them? It was playful banter, a game of cat and mouse that you knew she loved, but this time you didn’t answer, simply sat back and watched her chew on the meat, the sound of her humming in approval at the flavour reaching your ears. You could have prepared a better picnic, you could have brought candles and dried rose petals and made it all far more romantic but there was that spark in Avis’s eyes that told you it was perfect. With her hand left hand now resting over the grass she let her fingers rub and gently move in between the twigs and tiny little flowers, the moonlight reflecting on top of your head as the orange light from the lantern cast shadows over your face. She wondered for a moment who did you look like most; was it that grandmother you had mentioned or perhaps your father? Who did you inherit that nose of yours from or those blond locks that swayed in the warm breeze around the nape of your neck? A question assaulted her suddenly, out of curiosity more than anything else.
-When was the last time you talked with your mother?
-Oh. – it caught you off guard the drastic change of topic, but you couldn’t say that you were mad. It was natural for her to want to know more about you, after all, you had kept most of your private life secured away, afraid that she might find you too much of a foreigner or maybe simply lose interest since you were nothing like her acquaintances. But you wouldn’t have brought her here if you were not ready to share, you thought, knowing how much this whole place meant. – Well, I wrote to her last week, so I think that the response should arrive in maybe a couple of weeks.
-You don’t phone her?
-I can’t afford international calls. I do try though, on Christmas or birthdays, but sometimes I can’t. So, letters are the best method.
-Where are you from? You’ve talked about your home, but you’ve never told me. – grabbing a handkerchief Avis picked half of a chicken sandwich, eyes never leaving your face as your eyes glazed with memories untold, deep secrets you cherished in your heart, a tender smile growing on your lips.
-P/B. We are from a tiny village in the middle of nowhere, a couple of hours from the capital actually. I can’t say that we live on a farm but some of my neighbours do. It’s not as exciting as coming from New York, I’m afraid.
-No, but I’m sure is more beautiful. This place reminds you of home you said, and I can’t help but wonder just how much.
-Well, vast fields surround the village, and they seem endless as they go on and on into the horizon. – with your fork you stabbed one of the potatoes, biting down on it as steam curled in front of you, the thin layer of gravy mixing beautifully with the rosemary and the fat that coated the vegetable, swallowing before continuing. - In winter they are all brown and yellow as the farmers prepare the soil for the next sowing, although in some of the areas there are already tiny little sprouts growing before December is over. They might not look pretty at first, but if you go out early in the morning, when the sun is dawning, the olive trees rest among a thin fog that leaves very fragile layers of ice over the branches, and morning dew drops form over the grass that’s beginning to break from the ground. It usually doesn’t snow, but the very few times it has it’s a perfect scenery. White just never ceases to appear in front of your eyes and the air is so cold and crisp but so fresh and the smell of the chimneys just make it all so wholesome, so like home. - You were lost in a world of your own, the memories forming before your eyes as if you were standing right there, on the edge of the village seeing it all, hearing the loud voices of your neighbours and waving to the older married couples that were working on their lands, the cold almost numbing your fingertips. Avis had forgotten about the food and was simply resting her hands on the ground with her head lulled to one side observing the way your eyes were zoned out, your fingers moving gently as if you could show her where you were pointing at.
-In springtime though everything is gorgeous. There’s green everywhere, the trees that had laid naked amongst all that cold now blooming under the warm sun, flowers overtaking the grass as the cereals that had been planted grow tall, sometimes taller than me. There are red and white poppies, and so many four-o’clocks simply sprouting from the sandy grounds. My mother loves them and grows them in the garden in a variety of colours. Then of course there are the pines and olive trees that no matter where you look there’s mosaics of, and we use them for shade when we’ve been working out on the fields or in the garden, to cool down and have a bite. There are so many colours and so many insects. Our house gets filled with butterflies and bees that settle on my mother’s roses to rest and that drink from the tiny little yellow blossoms that will later become tomatoes. And the air… it’s so rich with fruits and vegetables and those wonderful floral fragrances that one could stay out all day and never get tired of it.
-It’s sounds like paradise.
-It’s far from it, but its home. We don’t have waterfalls or big deep valleys carved into the stone, but we have fields of lavender and hawks that fly high above, and slow-moving rivers where ducks and swans sometimes bathe. We can see roe deer jumping from between the trees and rabbits that rush around without a care in the word, building their burrows in those areas where the ground has not been planted so it can rest. Coming here makes me realise that there’s always a piece of home if you look for it, no matter how many miles separate you. It’s in your blood, in everything that you are and that you do. One might not realise it but it’s always there and it’s up to us to reject it and hide it or to embrace it and adapt it as we grow older, to never forget what makes us who we are. I did not grow up in big cities or high up on mountains, but I have lived surrounded by nature and dipping my feet into the warm sea, listening to the waves crashing against the rocks, filling my lungs with the salty breeze. I have walked among orange blossoms and lemon trees; I have been in nameless places in the middle of nowhere, but it was in those moments that I felt at peace.
-So why did you come here?
-Because one can’t stay stuck in the same place forever. I had a chance to make something for myself, to build a life that wasn’t the one my mother or my grandmother lived and as painful as it was, I took it. You left Northport to come here.
-True, but what I built was ruins. Nothing ever lasted before it was knocked down.
-I wouldn’t say that. People know you for you, not for Ace or Ellen or Dick. You have made a name for yourself even if the circumstances were not ideal or pleasant, but when they hear your name, they see you, not you with your husband or with a friend, just you. You might be standing over rubble, but you are not letting it keep you on the ground, you are picking up the pieces and making yourself a staircase to the top. You are running a studio and are going to release the best film in history, I think you have done pretty fantastic from that girl that you were back in Northport.
-How do you always see all the good, positive side of things?
-I usually don’t, but I have seen what sadness and hurt have done to you and I want to make it right. You deserve joy and love, not harsh words or bitter situations. You are doing what no one else has had the balls to do and I know that that girl who moved here years ago would be beaming with pride. – that girl that had been lost and miserable, Avis thought, would she truly be proud? She had had dreams that were shattered, a whole future shaped out before her that vanished into nothing when the talkies came, and then Ace and Claire happened and life just turned into a sea of habits and nasty looks, and that innocent girl became a not so innocent woman, but still filled with sadness and disappointment. And yet she felt as if you were right. That young thing from Northport would have never dreamt of running a studio or making a controversial film but foremost she would have never imagined she would find someone like you, the right person at the right time, just a bit later in life than what she had expected.
-I wish I could see the world though your eyes, I bet they are the most magnificent lenses anyone could wish for. Nothing is ever truly bad or horrid to you, there’s always hope and light at the end of the tunnel. With all those compliments you are giving me you are going to end up spoiling me if you are not careful. I might get used to this treatment. But how about you tell me what is it you want to build? What do you expect from life?
-I don’t know and that’s the beauty of it. My future is a blank canvas. I can be anything I desire, at least that’s what my mother says, from a secretary, as I am right now, to a nurse or a painter. I chose the paths I tread and admit my errors when I take wrong turns because that’s how one builds something worth fighting for. But if there’s one thing I know, it’s that you are the only person that I have painted on that canvas, the only thing that I’m sure I want as a constant for the rest of my existence. I don’t know where I might be in five or ten years, hell, I don’t even know If I will still be in contract at the studio in six months, but I do know that wherever I am, I will be beside you. – Had your eyes ever been this deep? Had they ever shone with such beauty and determination? Avis wasn’t sure, but under the warm light of the lantern they were open doors to your heart, to every feeling and desire that grew and wrapped around your chest, and she was suddenly pulled into them, falling and drowning in their abyss. Her hands moved the food gently to the side, the containers covered halfway to avoid spills, allowing her body to crawl on all four in your direction, knees digging hard onto the ground underneath the blanket leaving the imprint of tiny pebbles over the skin until she stopped right in front of you, the soft skin of her palms coming to rest on your cheeks as she drew your body to hers.
-And I want you with me. Forever.
There was no room for words anymore, your heart skipping a beat before it began to race as the feather light touches of her lips on yours, hovering but never actually pressing them, drove your hands to hold onto her hips, digging hard over the fabric of her dress as your bodyweight fell over hers. Gravity granted you a helping hand this time and as she pulled you even closer her mouth landed over yours in a tender kiss. Somewhere in the distance a loud coo was heard, echoing in the air around you both but Avis never parted herself from you, absolutely addicted to the way your carmine mixed with the rich tones of the wine and the saltiness of the gravy, leaving an aftertaste on the tip of her tongue that was simply you, your sweet essence. Breaking the profound navy blanket that covered the skies, a magnificent horned owl flew over the crystal waters at the edge of the cliff, flapping its enormous wings hundreds of feet above the ground, casting deep black shadows over the grass before perching itself high on a tree, observing in the night, protecting. Neither of you was bothered by its presence, you were all animals at the end of the day, creatures that had evolved up to this point in the history of the Earth forgetting that before cities and societies existed love was shown among the trees, on the edge of riverbends under the scorching sun or the coolness of the night. One of your hands moved to Avis’s back, the other one resting on the grass as your bodyweight pushed her gently on top of the blanket, the top of her head pocking from the corner of it and in contact with the now deep green that surrounded her.
The new position forced your lips to part, Avis’s chest raising and falling in hurried breaths, and as you moved your legs to straddle her, your foot accidentally kicked the lantern. The flame dying as your hands travelled to her sweet face, left you both bathed in only moonlight, the warm breeze caressing your bodies along with the sound of the flowing waters, crickets playing their quiet songs in the distance. Inching your fingers closer to the nape of her neck, feeling her soft ginger curls, they moved nearly of their own accord to massage her scalp, touching the cold metal pins she was wearing as you scratched your nails over her sensitive skin. It was delicious the way she hummed under you, her hands running up your back to your shoulders to keep you as close as possible to her, shivering as the heat of your body seeped through her stifling outfit. Your lips were torture on her neck, kissing the shape of it from her jawline to the hollow between her collarbones, licking and tasting her sweet skin as your fingers worked tenderly on removing as many hairpins as they could find, nibbling and scraping with your teeth. She needed you to mark her, to take her and make her yours. The way your light touches lingered on her flesh, delightful and thrilling as they drew goosebumps and gentle tingles on her limbs, made her brain slowly lose its train of thought and simply give into every sensation. Releasing the last pin, your fingers threaded deliciously in between her locks, pulling on her hair slightly harder than you had planned though she didn’t seem to mind. The motion had forced her head to lull back, a gasp escaping Avis’s ajar lips as the grip on your shoulder became stronger, her nails threatening to rip your dress.
You had never desired anything more in your life than to keep her in your arms for all eternity. That sweet spot under her ear was assaulted by your lips, the tip of your tongue tracing the outline of her earlobe, your hot breath tickling her skin and causing a mix between a giggle and a groan to slide from her mouth. Painstakingly slowly you moved along her jaw, lips delivering feather-like touches before you moved down to her neck again, sucking hard on her pulse point, delighted in the rumbling moan that she made as her throat vibrated beneath your lips. It was utterly gratifying to see how responsive she was to your touch, to the way your hands moved from her hair to her shoulders, fingering the neckline of her blouse, your fingertips barely brushing her skin and yet her pupils were so dilated that it was a miracle if you could actually get a glimpse of that gorgeous brown of hers. Dropping her hands to your hips her gaze was intense, watching your every move as you sat back over her thighs and began to trace the outline of her breasts and stomach through the fabric until they reached the hem, an obstacle that you had to remove, you thought. Avis felt you pushing the item gently off her abdomen, agreeing silently with you that it needed to come off. She desired to feel your skin on her skin, to have you as close as it was humanly possible, and so she pushed her upper body off the ground, resting its weight on her elbows as she guided your hands to push the garment off her midriff and arms until the blouse simply flew over the grass a foot or so away.
God, she was wearing a nearly see-through corselette. There was a deep groan vibrating in your throat at the sight, the translucent satin cupping her breasts so beautifully, so enticingly that the heat that was coursing through your veins nearly turned into fire, Avis’s rosy nipples stiff and fighting against the material. The boning of the garment hugged the curve of her waist as if it was made perfectly suited to her body shape, and perhaps it was, the olive kissed skin coming through the material that built the bodice, flowers and fallen petals embroidered in deep blues and greens, encasing her form. It was beautiful, you could not help but stare at it for a moment wondering how one came across such things, but your attention returned quickly to Avis, the heat of her body seeping to the palms of your hands from where they rested under her bust. Her heart was hammering against her ribs, bosom rising and falling in rapid breaths in anticipation, unknowing of your next move as your eyes bore into her skin, hot and cold shivers running down her arms and back. Your thumbs rubbed the underside of each breast causing Avis’s breaths to mix with her loud pants as your hands journeyed higher, cupping her tits graciously, the plump flesh overflowing from your palms as you began to knead them, dropping your lips to her now exposed collarbone, teeth scraping the flesh and leaving angry red marks that your tongue quickly soothed.
How could you drive her to such insanity every single time? It made no sense how well you already knew what made her mind go blank, mad with desire and lust, every spot in her body that could draw out moans and gasps, how much pressure to use, how much strength and roughness she required or wanted. Bruises on her body were a marvellous sight for her to wake up to, your lips sucking on the skin of her chest and the top of her ample bosom until the purple began to form, your tongue running over them to calm her flesh, but she would never ask you to stop, finding that gentle pain simply delicious, addicting as your head moved to the valley between her breasts, letting your tongue run over the translucent fabric until it reached her left nipple. The feeling of it rolling in your mouth alongside the friction the material provided was making Avis’s core burn hotter and higher, her left hand holding onto your hair while the other grabbed onto the blanket, her knuckles almost white. The stiff peak twirled around your tongue with ease, your lips sucking hard as your teeth scrapped the sensitive bud, a quiet scream making its way out of her mouth before she could stop it. She was always so vocal, so needy and ready for you. As your head was busy with her left breast your hand had been kneading her right one, but its mission had changed after noticing the way Avis moved under your weight, travelling down her side to the waistband of her skirt in search for the zipper, that was quite conveniently resting on her right hip.
Much to your dismay, and hers, you had to let go of Avis’s nipple, a gentle pop resonating from your mouth as you pushed your body onto the blanket to get rid of the black pencil skirt that prevented her from properly spreading her legs. The garment’s zip slid like butter, both of your hands pulling it down her legs as she lifted her hips off the ground to help you, leaving her matching knickers on display for your eyes to feast on. You were sure you had just had a mini heart attack at the sight of the translucent fabric, her folds practically exposed before you. There was a hunger inside you, a monstrous appetite simply for her, for every single inch of her that you could not satiate, both your hands crawling upwards on each side of her body, over the blanket, your legs moving in between hers to spread her open. Part of Avis was resting over the grass while the other was on top of the checkered fabric, but if the feeling of the cool plants on her skin bothered her she did not mention it, perhaps too lost in what you were doing to her as you hovered over her, lips so close to hers that she could taste the wine on your breath. Her eyes locked with yours, feeling the way her chest pressed against yours with each hurried breath she took, the moonlight reflecting and making her deep brown orbs glow even if deep inside them there was a light of their own, a veil of love and faith that made your heart swell with pride. You and only you had managed to do what no one else had; earn her trust.
Your lips landed softly over hers, your tongue dancing over her now non-existent carmine as you asked her silently for permission to explore her mouth once again, as if you didn’t have it memorised already, but she granted it, nevertheless. It was a battle for what little control you were willing to give to Avis this time, losing to her as she sucked on your lower lip, her hands holding you in place with her overheated palms on your cheeks. The air was filled with whimpers and whines, answers to your every little touch that only increased in pitch as you broke the kiss, one single drop of blood falling onto Avis’s own lips from where she had bit you down a bit harder, your mouth leaving a thin trail of the red warm liquid as you moved down her throat, vanishing as you pecked her chest. You had barely registered the way your blood was staining her skin, too focused on burying your tongue in the valley of her breasts, but the corselette was in the way and you could hardly reach that delicious skin that was calling out to you in whimpered whispers. Your hands were shaking slightly as you lifted your body from hers to work on the first few hooks of the garment, her ample tits inching closer to freedom as you unclasped each fastening, bouncing and jiggling under your working hands until they finally escape and stared at you in all their glory. You just couldn’t get enough of that creamy flesh and pink hard nipples. The mix between a gasp and moan that Avis produced was utterly sinful as you licked the skin and sucked around her right peak, small red marks painting her flesh before you devoured her, nibbling and pulling on her stiff nipple as your hand raked your nails over her left breast, to the point that only a score of screams could be heard from her.
-Please, Y/N.
To hear her pleading was such a thrilling sound, so unlike the Avis that everyone saw at the studio. And who were you to not listen when she was so sweet under your tongue, so responsive to the way your hands held onto her hips to keep her from thrashing around as you sucked and twirled her nipple until her pleas were finally needy enough, imploring even. You had made a deal after all. Under different circumstance you would have undressed her completely, drank her in until you were absolutely wasted in her essence, but this clearing was still a public area, anyone could come here; you doubted they would, but it could still happen, and you were not willing to let strangers see Avis in such a compromising position. Still, you released her breast after one final nibble that had her eyes rolling to the back of her head momentarily and began to kiss the fabric of her bodice all the way to her pubic bone, the material showing the wet spots you had left behind as you licked and pecked. If you took the lantern and gave it to Avis, she was sure she could light it with her bare hands from the way her skin and blood burnt high, scorching every cell of her being. You were inching closer and closer to where she needed you the most, your lips dancing from her left hip to her right, brushing your kisses so close to her clit that she thought she would go insane if you didn’t touch her, eat her alive. In a quick motion one of her hands held onto your hair, pulling roughly as if she could motion you to obey her, but you were quick to push it away and moved to hover your body over hers. With your hand you grabbed her face roughly, forcing her to face you.
-Do you want me to fuck you, Avis?
-Yes. – she was utterly breathless, lust filling every pore in her body as your domineering energy laced your words, sending shivers down her spine as she felt your other hand lazily moving between her ginger locks. Upon grabbing a handful, you pulled hard, a gasp muttered almost against your lips as the pain rippled through Avis’s frame, turning into such pleasure that she thought she might cum on the spot.
-Then behave. We’ve reversed roles, remember? I could have you writhing in pleasure for hours or I could refuse to touch you until you begged and cried for me to eat you out. – God, she loved you, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as your fingers traced the outline of her folds through her underwear, absolutely drenched and so impossibly hot to the touch. – Is this what you want?
-More.
-More? You mean something… like this? – your skilled fingers moved the lacy garment aside, freeing her completely to the warm air of the night. Dipping them properly in between her wet lips, you slid them up and down as slowly as you could, taking in the way her left hand shot out to grab your upper arm, the other one laid hidden under the bunched-up blanket, groans and moans echoing in your ears as her eyes fluttered close. Her neck was right under your mouth, a slow tender lick coming from the hollow between her collarbones to right under her chin, cleaning up the blood you had left there only a few minutes earlier, drawing out a quiet whimper. It was borderline torture, it had to be, the way you were moving at a snail’s pace, and she knew you knew, a smirk on your lips when she opened her eyes with a pleading look.
-Please, Y/N, don’t tease me.
-It’s not enough? Maybe I can do something about it. – your motions stopped completely, the frustration at the lack of friction making her whine. With your lips brushing her ear you whispered lustfully. - Apologise and I’ll give you everything you’ve ever wanted. Just one word, Avis.
-I’m sorry. I’m sorry Y/N! Please, please.
-Well done, darling.
She almost missed the pain on her scalp when you released her hair, but there wasn’t much room for her to think when she felt your lips on her inner thighs, licking the soft skin and kissing your way up to the joint between her hip and her wet folds, her breath hitching in her lungs in anticipation. The instant your tongue slid over them she felt as if she was about to pass out, her eyes rolling to the back on her head, ripping what grass she could grasp with her fist. It didn’t matter how many times you tasted her; she was the most delicious salty meal you could ever have, and there was a perfectly cooked steak maybe two feet from you both, but it could not fill you up the way Avis did. The laps you were doing on her drew out moans and yelps from deep within her, her legs trembling already, hips buckling to try and get as much friction as she could. To keep her still you placed a hand on her lower abdomen, reaching with the tip of your tongue the base of her clit. She was close, you could feel it in the way her thighs were beginning to shake ever so slightly, her moans higher and higher in pitch but they were still not quite there yet. There were wrinkles in the blanket that were digging on your knees, but you cared very little, adding your fingers to the upwards-downwards motion as to coat them in her juices and make sure you didn’t hurt her, though with how your face and upper thighs were practically drowning in her arousal you doubted it could happen.
-God, Y/N, more. Fuck.
Two fingers went deep inside her, pumping gently in and out to let her adjust, your tongue having moved higher until her swollen bundle was twirling lazily in your mouth, her fingers on your head out of habit and to keep you well in place. There was a thin layer of sweat covering Avis’s body that made her glow under the moonlight, her skin flustered and the most erotic shade of red your eyes had ever seen, her head lulling back with each movement from your fingers, pants and yelps echoing against the trees. You should keep her quiet, she could draw the attention of passersby, if there were any, but you couldn’t quite do it, it was just delectable to hear her lost in passion. Without a care in the world. Her walls clenched around you, a sign that you needed to increase the pace of your hand as your lips sucked on her clit, feeling how she was coming undone piece by piece at a faster speed that you had anticipated. She must have really worked herself up throughout the day to be so desperate for release. The hand that was holding her in place pressed a little harder, mixing with the third finger that you had just pushed in, adding to the pleasure that had been steadily building higher and higher, skyrocketing it. Her throat felt raw as she screamed over and over, losing her mind under your ministrations, the tension building as her toes curled and her heels dug onto the earth. With one hard nibble on her clit, along with your fingers curling, pressing almost against the one on her abdomen and she fell completely apart.
-Y/N! YES! AHHH! YES! YES!
There was fire in her veins, white hot flames spreading through every cell, every limb, electric shocks travelling from the top of her head to the tip of her toes and fingers, her head thrashing up and down as she held onto your head, buckling her hips to meet your pace as she rode out her orgasm. Her eyes were open wide for an instant, the sky above peppered with millions of tiny sparkles of light, but she was unsure whether they were real or simply brought on by the pleasure that was rocking her entire body. Either way, she didn’t have enough sense left to think, let alone differentiate between reality and dreams. Your punishing pace never faltered, pants and screams mixing until her juices exploded all over your face, her mouth hanging open in utter silence as her back arched of the ground. So the hand pressing on the abdomen really did work, , a little something you had read in a very inappropriate book, you thought as she squirted all over you, your tongue lapping up and down and around your fingers to make sure you were capturing every single drop until there was nothing left, drinking her in. Your mouth had left her overstimulated clit alone, kissing the soft skin of her thighs and knees as you gently helped her come down from her high, fingers slowing down after a moment or two until her legs stopped trapping your head, dropping onto the floor with gentle trembles, the hand on your head slipping onto the ground. She was completely spent, her head clouded in desire and afterglow passion that kept her laying on the floor panting for air. Pulling out, you used to blanket to wipe your fingers clean, crawling beside her until your head rested over your arm, rubbing Avis’s shoulder in an attempt to calm her racing heart and to let her know you were still there, that you hadn’t left her.
-Well, that was fun, wasn’t it?
-Hmmm – all that she could muster at the moment was to open her eyes lazily, turning her head to look at you as the waves of pleasure left her body, the hand that had been holding onto the blanket finally freeing it form its grip, rubbing your thigh over your dress. – It was fantastic, doll. And you say that Ernie didn’t put you on contract?
-I haven’t lost my touch it seems. And yes, there wasn’t much market for me, I’m afraid.
-Fools, all fools. Trust me, baby, if you ever do lose it, I’ll be the first to inform you.
-Good to know. I was wondering, honey, where did you get this underwear? It’s gorgeous.
-It’s actually tailored. I wanted something special, and I went to my favourite store to see what they could do, and we came up with this. I wanted the flowers in gold and white, but they didn’t stand out enough, so we settled on blue and green. Did you notice what flowers they are?
-I’m afraid not, I was too busy staring at your magnificent breasts. – a loud laugh burst from her throat, floating in the air around you as she tapped your thigh in amusement. It was a gift the way you made her adore herself the same way you worshipped her body, as if she was a work of art. After a moment it died down, leaving a small smile on her swollen lips.
-Thank you for the compliment, dear. As for the flowers, they are orange blossoms.
-Avis.
-I know, I didn’t have to do this, but I wanted to. I wanted to have something that clearly means the world to you as closer to me as possible. I couldn’t risk a necklace with your picture, so I settled for the next best thing that would still keep you near my heart.
Your hands took hold on her waist, pulling her body impossibly close to yours, needing her in your space, in your personal bubble. With your left hand you turned her face towards you until your lips met hers, a sweet tender kiss to show her just how much you appreciated the gesture. You would never met someone like her, there was no one like Avis in this entire universe and you couldn’t believe how lucky you were to have found her. She still needed a minute or two to go back to normal, the lazy patterns your fingers were painting on her overheated skin soothing the sensations that were still clinging to her skin. Breaking the kiss your head hid in the crook of her neck, smelling her perfume and the soft hint of sweat that laid over her flesh, but Avis’s eyes were staring up at the sky. The deep universe that laid up above was sprinkled with billions of stars, glinting and shinning like diamond in the firmament, coloured clouds of dust swirling between them, around them, all over, in bright pinks, reds and purples, brushstrokes of baby blue blending among them. They formed a perfect line that crossed from North to South, and as the seconds went by perfect white swirls appeared all around as if an explosion of the most beautiful colour palette had just happened before her eyes, the universe in constant change right in front of her. She could spend all eternity laying here with your body pressed against hers, eyes taking in every little detail of the world around her, the deep emerald trees blending with the navy blue in perfect contrast. A gentle cooing reached her ears, eyes moving from left to right until they settled on the owl that had perched itself high up on a pine tree a while ago, its piercing yellow eyes watching her for an instant before they returned to the deep valley beneath you all. She had lost track of time she realised.
-Y/N?
-Hmm? – with a tender peck on the side of her neck you turned your head to look at her, observing how enthralled she was by the sky. It warmed your heart to see that even after so many years of Avis walking on this planet there were still secrets you could show her, images that her eyes had never laid upon and that you had the power to engrave in her mind.
-Have I told you that I love you?
-Once or twice, I think.
-Well, don’t you forget it, because I truly love you.
-As if I ever could when I love you just as much, Avis.
Her hands slid over yours, a small smile on her lips as she closed her eyes, letting your heat seep into her skin and bones. A cool breeze swept through the clearing, a deep shiver shaking Avis’s frame. It was beginning to get cold, and as you glanced down at your wristwatch you saw that it was nearly eleven, too late for you both after the day you had had. You didn’t want to unwrap yourself from Avis’s frame, but you didn’t want her to get sick, your hands pulling her into a sitting position to hook the corselette back in place, being extra careful not to touch her sensitive nipples. As she adjusted her bosom you crawled around picking up her skirt and blouse, hissing as you felt your knees land right over the spot where all of Avis’s hairpins had landed, cursing under your breath. You had half a mind to leave them there but you didn’t want Avis to ask about them when you were already ten miles away from here and have to drive back to not find them in the dark, so you went around feeling the blanket with your palms and putting them in your pocket until you were sure you had most of them. She was waiting patiently on her knees, the pearly beams bathing her skin as if she was dressed in silver. Your eyes stared at her tussled hair and bruised skin for an instant, contemplating your handy work with pride before handing her the clothes. As you dealt with the uneaten food and spilt cups of wine, from the corner of your eye, you watched Avis stepping into her skirt, the perfect curve of her ass so tempting, the black garment hugging her perfectly as she zipped it before pushing her head through the blouse, smoothing the fabric best she could once everything was in place, running a hand through her slightly knotted curls. Standing up you were about to put the basket back in the trunk when Avis stopped you.
-We still have the ride home; all this doesn’t have to go to waste. Just give it to me.
She had a new lightness to her, her feet almost skipping barefoot over the grass as she rounded the hood of the car to leave the basket on the passenger’s seat, heading your way to help you fold the blanket once you had put the champagne bottle in the trunk. Nature suited her, it gave her a new look on things, it made her feel alive, as if there was something much bigger than her that she had the opportunity to contemplate. Maybe one day the both of you could live in a secluded spot without a worry in the universe, only the trees or the waves witnesses to your love. Once Avis had put her shoes on your eyes there was nothing left on the ground, no sign of what had transpired in the last few hours, and as you were about to turn towards the car you felt for an instant that you could not quite go, that everything had been too perfect to lose it, to only keep it as a memory. Avis had noticed your slumped shoulders and was quick to wrap her arm around your waist and pull you close, simply watching it all. She wanted to say something but was unsure as to what, she wasn’t sure if you even needed to hear something, feeling as if she had to let you go through this on your own terms. So, she simply stood by you, her presence comforting as you once more said a mental goodbye to your home. It never got easier even if it wasn’t really your land or your country, but the sky above was always the same, no matter where you stood the same stars shone bright and glinted in the night and you knew that no matter many oceans separated you from your family they were looking up at the same firmament, a point of eternal union. With a quite sigh you promised yourself that you would come by soon, with Avis if you could.
Nodding against her shoulder Avis understood the movement and gently guided you towards the car, letting go of your hand after opening the door for you. With the both of you settled over the leather seats, the warmth of the cabin a welcome feeling on Avis’s slightly chilled skin you turned the engine on and carefully drove down the same path you had used to get there in the first place. “In the Mood” was playing on the radio, a cheery tune that quickly lifted your spirts, a fork with a piece of steak appearing in your line of vision. With a chuckled you took the meat, chewing even though it was cold, not that you minded, the rich flavours still there, just dulled a little. Hearing some ruffling beside you, you turned your attention away from the road for a moment to see Avis battling with a potato that kept sliding off her fork, the gravy dripping in thick drops. Reaching the edge of the woods, the sign for Runon Park shone bright against your car’s headlights, showing the way to those awful secondary roads that you needed to drive trough to get to the freeway, but the ride wasn’t as back. Avis kept feeding you every few minutes, a light banter and chatter settling between you over the music that the radio was playing, a sip from the bottle of wine smoothing everything down beautifully until there was only a little bit less of the red liquid left once you got to the freeway.
At that time of night there wasn’t much traffic, and you could slip your eyes of the road just a tad bit more to look at Avis as she gave you the final bite of the Caesar salad, moving on to the fruit. There were strawberries, bananas and what you suspected were slices of oranges, not entirely sure from your current angle. Avis showed you the fork with some of it, asking simply by raising her eyebrows, but you kindly declined, full already and not desiring a night of tossing and turning with indigestion, she could have it all if she wanted them. The radio began to play a different tune, something a bit slower, the atmosphere in the car adapting perfectly as you took exit 56, your companion resting her back against the seat while munching happily on what you were now sure were oranges. The Amberg residence was only a few streets away already, swerving the car around the corner, the night inching closer to an end that neither of you wanted, reality settling in between you once again, those stupid social norms that kept you from simply walking into her house and never leaving. The streetlamps shone bright as you came up to the gates, noticing strangely that they were slightly open, Mr. Breaton nowhere to be found, but you didn’t think much of it, he was an older man and it was already late, he could have simply gone home.
Parking on the side, in your unofficial spot, you turned the engine off. There was no beating around the bush, she was home, and she didn’t want to part ways with you, she simply wasn’t ready; there was a voice in the back of her mind that told her that she had to stay with you. Avis had turned her head in your direction, but the words she was about to say never made it out, your body already out of the car, rounding the hood to open the door for her. You didn’t want to leave her, of course, but you weren’t going to cry about it either, you preferred to cling to the memories of this evening, stretching your hand to help her out after pushing the door out of the way. She was pleasantly surprised by the gesture and smiled up at you, a charming “thank you” leaving her lips. Maybe it wouldn’t be as hard to convince as she had thought. Accompanying her to the front door the breeze that swayed around you both was turning colder by the minute, a very slow fog forming around the streetlamps. The hairs on the nape of your neck suddenly rose, your body filled with goosebumps, the strangest sensation spreading through your body, but you were quick to push it away. The porchlight was on, glowing softly as you walked the few steps that separated the garden from the front doors, coming to stand under its roof. It was rather childish the way you were both simply standing there, like a teenage couple that had just returned from watching a film or having a milkshake, wanting to stay with each other but knowing that the best thing was to part ways. And yet your hands never left hers.
-Here we are.
-Yes, here we are.
-You can stay if you want. There’s more than enough room in my bed for you. – her grip was a bit harder, hope blooming in her chest that perhaps tonight she wouldn’t have to go up to an empty bedroom and lay awake all alone.
-I know, but your daughter’s home and you need to sleep. I’ve kept you out long enough already.
-She doesn’t have to know.
-I don’t want to ruin the relationship you are building with her. I don’t want you to lie to her and break that bond that you’ve been working so hard on.
-I don’t want you to go. – her voice was so small; it sounded so weak and sad that you were tempted to stay and throw caution to the wind, but you knew that if you stayed Claire would go nuts at you both if she found out, and you were more than sure that you would find it very hard to not sleep with Avis again and she really needed to rest. Letting go of one of her hands you placed it on her cheek, rubbing the soft skin tenderly.
-I don’t want to either but think about it this way. If I go, you will have something look forward to the next time we met. True that it won’t be in a week, we will see each other again at the studio tomorrow, but I’m sure that you will look forward to it.
-Will you have lunch with me then?
-Of course. Now, go in and go to bed. I think I’ve left you satiated enough that sleep will find you easily.
-Cheeky. Thank you for tonight Y/N. I’m grateful that you showed me such a special place. I didn’t know there was anything like that here.
-It was my pleasure, believe me. Perhaps when the weather allows it, you and I can go visit a few more of those secret spots.
-I would love to. I’ll see you tomorrow?
-Tomorrow.
-I love you.
-I love you too.
These bittersweet kisses were not your favourites by far, after all partings never were even if they were only temporary, but at least you would go to bed with the flavour of her and the acidity of the oranges she had just had deep in your lips. Separating after a few seconds, she flashed you a bright smile before pulling her keys put of her purse and opening the doors. From underneath the threshold she blew you a kiss, your hand moving to catch it and place it close to your heart. The darkness of the hall swallowed her, and you stood there until the sound of the heavy oak closing in front of you boomed in your head. Perhaps you had been wrong, maybe you could stay tonight, just once, you thought, but your musings were interrupted by the sudden feeling that someone was watching you. For an instant you thought it might be Claire, but the curtains of her room were drawn and there were no shapes near the windows. Turning around you inspected the garden but there was no one there and yet the feeling only got worse, the fog settling faster than you liked as you made your way to your car as quickly as possible. Avis heard the rumbling of your motor from the bedroom, removing her clothes as she stepped into the bathroom, that feeling that you should have stayed stronger than before but there was nothing she could do about it now. Backing out from the house and back onto the road you didn’t see the figures dressed in black that came from the shadows, slipping into Avis’s house without an issue, hands signalling onto the empty street, or what might have been an empty street if a black Lincoln hadn’t unparked out of the blue, following you into the night. Come the next day you would realise that its headlights never turned on.
#avis amberg#avis amberg x reader#patti lupone x reader#patti lupone#lilia calderu#lilia x reader#we thank miss lupone simply for existing#hollywood 2020
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I've been reading your fics, and I love them! I heard you wanted some long fic ideas, so a medic x reader proposal fic? I literally eat up fluff fics of these folk, even though there's a bunch everywhere.
Also, I'm really happy you can get the appreciation you deserve on tumblr! You definitely know how to write❤️.
A/n: AHHH THIS IS SO CUTTTEEEE!!!! Also thank you!! I used to write fanfic 2 years ago, but never really posted, just wrote them in my notebook like it was a little book.!
Proposal: Medic x Nurse!s/o.
“Ach! Where is it? She’s going to be back soon, where is it!
Medic was STRESSED.
First they were called for a battle last minute, ruining Medic’s plans that he had.
Then the Mercs kept calling him for stupid little insignificant injuries that could have waited!
Now here he was, looking, scrambling for the little velvet box he had bought.
“Ah! There it is!”
Medic reached his hand and pulled out the pretty pink velvet box. This was a pretty little thing that was made for another pretty little thing, his little Liebling, soon to be his kleine Frau.
You, Y/n. His pretty, nursing assistant turned girlfriend of 2 years now. Medic usually wouldn’t do dating, but the way you had him wrapped around your fingers. He was so in love, that even some of his fellow mercs noticed a slight change whenever you were around him.
He had overheard you chatting with Ms. Pauling, you chatted about marriage, and even settling down…with him of all people!
He remembered blushing at this conversation. Medic himself had never really dreamt of being a family man. But when he saw how you gushed about having kids and wanting to give your children a better life than you had.
Suddenly medic was ready to be a father and giddily planning your wedding behind your back.
“Now..All I have to do is ask her.”
“All you have to do is ask me what, babe?”
Medic jumped as he quickly hid the box behind his back, being started by you.
“Oh, mein Liebling! Do not do that, you scared me!”
You giggle as you sat your bag down, you had finished up your work early and came to see Medic. “Sorry~ But no serious, whatcha got there~”
Medic got flustered as you pulled him forward by his tie, you knew what you were doing to him. He could feel his cheeks warming up and he went to look away.
“A-ah..Well that is a surprise! You would have to release my tie and you will see what it is!”
You sigh and give him a peck on his nose before releasing his tie. He fixes his tie before sighing softly.
“Close your eyes for me.”
“You’re not gonna knock me out so you can surgically switch our hearts back, i got used to yours in here.”
Medic chuckles. “No, No. Don’t open them until I say so.”
You giggle and keep your eyes closed, you can hear Medic moving around, as well as him mumbling under his breath for a bit before you hear him clear his throat.
“Open them for me.”
You open your eyes and the sight before you is enough for your heart- well medics heart, to melt.
“O-oh..Ludwig..” You cover your mouth as you had to fight the tears that were going to build.
Infront of you, Medic, Your Ludwig, was on one knee, a box in his hand, opened, presenting a beautiful ring to you. You could see that his face was flushed, a small smile on his face.
“Will you do me the honor, Of becoming my wife?”
You nodded happily, and tackling him to the ground when he placed the ring on your finger. You placed so many kisses on is face, that had Medic giggling as he held you close to him.
“Oh you’ve just made me the happiest Doctor in the world~!, Not only are you my assistant, you are now mein wife!” He says as he hugs you, the two of you sit up, leaning against his cabinet.
“Mhm..and that means we should celebrate~’ You purr, by pulling at his tie. Medic blushes before smirking at you. “Oh really?..~”
Engineer was a walking with Pyro, they both had a question to ask Medic.
Pyro was walking ahead of Engineer and spotted archimedes had been placed outside of the Medbay.
Heading over to the bird, they were confused at why it was outside, and was about to open the door, but stopped, deciding to place their face to the door to listen in instead.
“O-oh fuck..~! Medic..Medic..~”
“Yes, Yes. Moan for your husband Darling.”
Pyro pulled away from the door and stood infront of Engineer.
Engineer tilts his head. “What the matta, Pyro? Is Medic not in there?”
Pyro shakes his head quickly “No” and Engineer then gives a small smile, “Well then that’s alright, Let’s go join the others, I’m sure the doc will be in soon.”
Pyro nods when he follows Engineer back to the common area.
Hope you enjoy!!!
#nova's writings 💻#tf2 fanfiction#tf2 x reader#tf2 fanfic#tf2 fandom#team fortress 2 x reader#team fortress 2#team fortress 2 imagines#tf2#team fortress 2 medic x reader#tf2 medic x reader#medic x reader#team fortress medic#tf2 medic
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In the mood for...
Oct 23rd
~*~
1. itmf fics where lwj (or even one of the other characters like nhs or the juniors) gets mad about what lxc said to wwx about being lwj’s only mistake?
Thank you for your help!
break by justdoityoufucker (orphan_account) (T, 3k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, LXC Critical, JC Critical, Canonical Character Death, Guānyīn Temple Scene, BAMF WN, Protective WN)
🔒💖 When has silence saved anyone? by Vrishchika (T, 6k, wangxian, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, post-canon, LXC critical, family feels, angry LWJ & LSZ, LXC gets scolded)
~*~
2. hello! itmf request for fics where lwj punches people. like we know he's good with the sword but his lan arm strength should also be used for breaking jaws with his fists. no jc bashing tho. i mean lwj can beat him up, but id rather the author not, yknow? thank you very much in advance and blessings come your way!
~*~
3. Do you know of any fics where wwx's ghost sticks around to help raise lsz? @dawnforger-fr
🧡 Lan Sizhui Sees Dead People Series by darkbrokenreaper (T, 30k, WIP, WangXian, LWJ & LSZ, JC & LSZ, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Kid Fic, Hurt/Comfort, lsz sees dead people, Paranormal)
🧡 Ghosts Shouldn’t by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 15k, WangXian, Grief/Mourning, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending)
From the beyond Series by apathyinreverie (T, 11k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Some angst, Ghost WWX, BAMF LWJ, BAMF WWX, Domestic WangXian, rogue cultivators wangxian, of sorts, Ghostly Sunshine Husbands: A Guide on Accidental Sect Creation by Hanguang-Jun, Cultivation World Critical, Fix-It, Oblivious WWX, Smitten LWJ, Time Skips)
A-Yuan’s first Inquiry by SaiaiSaiko (G, 1k, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX, LWJ Plays Inquiry, LSZ Plays Inquiry, Canonical Character Death, Spirits)
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4. (First part moved to FF) where wwx goes to the future (modern) if you have any fanfics like that, I would appreciate it @quwieiidkd
🔒Confusion by Vrishchika (Not rated, 4k, wangxian, time travel)
🧡 The Shade of Old Trees by Kryal (T, 363k, WangXian, Ridiculously Long Notes, History, Canon Divergence, Modern AU, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Slow Life, Action/Adventure, Magic Returns, BAMF WWX) which isn't tagged as time travel but has a canon-era Wei Wuxian frozen in a block of ice and, after being discovered in current times and thawed, he has to adjust to the future. / One of my all time top favourites
🔒I Got Isekai'd into a High School Romance But I Used to Be the Founder of Demonic Cultivation! by LizzyPanic (T, 20k, WangXian, Minor XuanLi, Canon Divergence, Modern AU, Reverse Isekai and Transmigration, High School, wwx is a cultivator, no one else is, Pining, Flirting, attempts at humor, gender nonconforming nhs, First Kiss, Good Uncle LQR, Light Angst)
~*~
5. Yilingwei type fics, some have protective commoners. I really wanna say murder of crows by cerbykerby or cradle by dragonesque had that element. I know I've read ones where the locals find the visiting cultivators sus and the cold welcome unnerves the visitors (cause they expected the locals to hate the "great evil") or where locals scam the voting cultivators by over charging for items they wouldn't be familiar with cause snooty & don't shop for themselves
~*~
6. In the mood for:
a) Canon characteristics compliant fics.
b) Fics where Lan Xichen is shady, mean, condescending, or doesn't like Wei Wuxian (Preferably with LWJ standing by his man)
c) modern Fics where WWX is disowned or kicked out of the Jiang but goes on to do well. (Preferably, confident!WWX)
Please 🥺 and thank you 😊 @myblurryreality
For 6B, I didn't mention it but it can be in canon or an AU.
6A)
It's Only Time by etymologyplayground (T, 8k, WangXian, Epistolary, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, It's About The Yearning., Getting Together, Love Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Humor)
and he sang about the stars by hauntme_then (M, 29k, WangXian, Brotherhood, Growing Up Together, Canon Compliant, Canon-Typical Violence, Angst, Grief/Mourning, Canonical Character Death)
Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Not Rated, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, WangXian, dad wangji, LWJ’s Questionable Parenting Skills, Grief/Mourning, Recovery, Injury Recovery, Hopeful Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses [podfic] by someplacelikebolivia)
Florescendo by flowercity (FaoriE) (T, 9k, WangXian, Sentient Burial Mounds, Canon Compliant, POV Second Person, POV Third Person, Introspection, there are wangxian scenes but theyre not the focus, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Kinda, poetic prose, the mortifying ordeal of having hope, Character StudyParallels)
6C)
crimson blue by cherrywhiskey (E, 138k, WangXian, Modern, Arranged Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, Marriage of Convenience, genius WWX, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Supportive LQR, Bottom LWJ, Eventual mpreg, Protective WWX, protective LWJ, Soap Opera, with plenty of telenovela tropes, like scheming in-laws, sizzling drama, Romance, AND SO MUCH LOVE & DEVOTION, Power Couple Wangxian, they're smitten with each other, WWX × LQR bonding, soft LWJ, but he also has a temper, WWX's debt & duty factor is heavily focused, baby is not having a good time im sorry, let me show you what Wei Wuxian's love looks like, comes with gorgeous arts) he doesn't get kicked out, more like leaves
Crazy, Rich Cultivators by ShanaStoryteller (Not rated, 13k, wangxian, Modern Cultivation, Idiots in Love, Misunderstandings, POV LWJ, īthis started as a crazy rich asians au but quickly got away from me, light moments of angst but mostly shenanigans)
🔒 Step by step by apathyinreverie (T, 12k, WangXian, Modern AU, JFM and YZY Bashing, not particularly Jiang family friendly, Guilt, Fluff, past angst, Flashbacks, Protective LWJ, Soft WWX, adorable a-yuan, Friendship, Family, Getting Together, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff)
Catharsis by Starfell123 (T, 9k, WangXian, Modern Cultivation, mentions of abuse, Mentions of Disownment, Swearing, Friendship, Attempted Arranged Marriage, WWX has gone through therapy, Catharsis, supportive friends, Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Genius WWX, Rich WWX, Bad Parent YZY, Bad Parent JFM, BAMF WWX)
you'll always know me (ana_cp) by anaphoricae (E, 127k, WangXian, Modern, Actor WWX, Teacher LWJ, Getting Back Together, Exes to Lovers, is it exes to lovers if you never quite defined your relationship?, for WangXian it is, Angst with a Happy Ending, LWJ being cute with children alert, WWX rides a motorcycle, LWJ writes as a hobby, ALL THE GOOD THINGS, Back hugs as a love language, Sharing Food as a Love Language, Really anything between them is a love language if you squint hard enough)
~*~
7. Hello! Could someone recommend some fics where wwx is believed dead at the burning of lotus pier/the burial mounds/the beginning of the war and everyone mourns him??? Thank you in advance, have a nice day <333
The Scarlet Lotus by rainbowninja167 (M, 137k, WangXian, Marriage of Convenience, Secret Identity, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Canon-Typical Violence, canon-typical war crimes, Yunmeng Bros, the mortifying ordeal of getting seduced by your own husband, nonlinear chronology we die like cql, just kidding nobody dies in this fic, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication) doesnt die, but everyone believes he's gone crazy
Lay my body down by tawaen (M, 48k, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, wangxian, WWX & JYL, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Eventual WangXian, No Golden Core Transfer, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, What if WWX saw the first siege of the burial mounds and said Nope to the war, OCs, OC point-of-view for one chapter for plot reasons)
Go Hiking With a Blindfold On by Hauntcats (Not Rated, 12k, WangXian, WWX & JC, WWX & WQ, Not JC Friendly, Time Travel Fix-It, No Golden Core Transfer, Canon JC Characteristics)
when you’re doing all the leaving (then it’s never your love lost) by tardigradeschool (T, 26k, wangxian, canon divergence, hurt/comfort, canon-typical violence, sharing clothes, sharing a bed, fix-it, golden core transfer)
The Fire Lapping Up the Creek by notevenyou (E, 66k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Injury, Injury Recovery, Blood, Respiratory Illness, Major Illness, Fever, Grief/Mourning, Burial Mounds, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hunger and food scarcity, Surgery, Fix-It of Sorts)
only the dead (have seen the end of war) by comforting_monachopsis (T, 42k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, temporary amnesia, BAMF WWX, sad LWJ, grief/mourning, loneliness, mild gore, secret identity, loss of identity, identity porn, angst, humor, crossdressing)
~*~
8. Hello 🥰!
Itmf:
A) Artist Lan Wangji and muse Wei Wuxian. Whether it's painting, photography, sculpture, I'm happy!
B) Wangxian (one or both) being acrobats like in Cirque Du Soleil. I'm talking aerial silks, those things in the air where performers throw other performers to each other, contortionists, etc.
C) One or both of Wangxian as dancers. It can be any kind of dancing (if it's sexual, I'd prefer it if there wasn't a lot of actual sex). Ballroom dancing, ballet dancing, swing dancing, whatever! (I've already read Unstrictly Ballroom by Ariaste).
Thank you!! @acebookdragon47
8A)
when you say nothing at all by sysrae (T, 4k, WangXian, Modern AU, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, artist LWJ, tattoo artist WWX, past angst, Getting Together, emotionally significant art installations, Soulmates)
🔒a reunion is made of words by spookykingdomstarlight (T, 2k, WangXian, Modern AU, Artist LWJ, Estranged Friends to Lovers, Reunions, Chance Meetings, Second Chances)
Muse by LadyVamp (E, 9k, WangXian, WangXianXi, Modern AU, Romance, Tragic Romance, Artist and Muse, Painting, Sex, Explicit Sexual Content)
8B)
fear you won't fall by anaphoricae (E, 87k, WangXian, Modern, Circus, Fire Dancer WWX, Trapeze Artist LWJ, Slow Burn, Rom com vibes, No Angst, Just an overall good time I hope, Come as Lube, Rimming, WWX and LWJ's 'mutual dislike' to 'let's get married tomorrow' pipeline, some scenes of WWX and LWJ being really cute with children. Beware!, Bottom LWJ) circus au with trapeze artist lwj & fire dancer wwx
8C)
Falling to the Rhythm by Selenay (E, 128k, WangXian, Modern: No Powers, Dance, Strictly Come Dancing Fusion, Ballroom Dancing, Dancer!WWX, Violinist LWJ, Pining While Dancing, Oblivious WWX, Gratuitous Costume Descriptions, Gratuitous dancing descriptions, Slow Burn, [Podfic] Falling to the Rhythm by semperfiona_podfic (semperfiona)) Both fics are explicit but I don't believe there're too many explicit scenes in either story.
varied my velocities by fantasiavii (E, 58k, WangXian, Modern AU, Ballerina LWJ, Football/Soccer player WWX, Enemies to Lovers, Top WWX/Bottom LWJ, Dom WWX, Angst with a happy ending, Internalized homophobia) Both fics are explicit but I don't believe there're too many explicit scenes in either story.
Pas de Deux by TriviasFolly (M, 62k, WangXian, Modern AU, ballet dancer lwj, Hip Hop Dancer WWX, dance teacher au, reference to career ending injuries, referenced injuries, Addiction, Drug Addiction, we attempt some pining)
Ugly Duckling by Witch_Nova221 (T, 57k, WangXian, NieLan, Romance, Friends to Lovers, Ballet Dancer WWX, Ballet Dancer LWJ, Theatre, Dance School)
🔒space, skin, muscle, bone by tombenough_and_continent (T, 23k, WangXian, Modern AU, Matthew Bourne's Swan Lake, Non-Linear Narrative, Dance, Background SongXiao, background NieLan, a surprising amount of texting, gratuitous use of ballet terminology)
~*~
9. ITMF where WWX's title is not yiling patriach. Like ghost flute or red lotus or something. It could be that his title was yiling patriach and he or someone change the title to something else. Thanks!
Hand in Hand Together (All Your Life) by sami (T, 41k, JC/WZL, WangXian, Asexual JC, Queerplatonic relationship, Implied future NMJ/JYL, Not Everyone Dies, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Honestly at this point you probably know what you're getting with me, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Slow Burn)
~*~
10. ITMF where LWJ runs away/defecting the lan sect and join the jiang sect. Like after his punishment, he feels trapped in the lan sect and leaves his forhead ribbon and then join the jiang
Bonus if JWY and LWJ become a reluctant partner in crime/coparenting
Another bonus if WWX is the only casualty
Thanks
The Price of Freedom by meyari (T, 32k, WangXian, JC/LWJ, Past Character Death, Grief/Mourning, PTSD, Post-War, Children In Danger, Past Rape/Non-con, Warning: JGS, Physical Abuse, Chronic Pain, Canon-Typical Violence, seriously a lot of grief and loss, no resurrections (yet), LQR Bashing, Execution, excessive discipline, Platonic Relationships) note that it's tagged for JC/LWJ but it actually is more platonic
Delight in Misery by nirejseki (Not rated, 44k, WangXian, JC & WWX, JC & LWJ, JC/LWJ, WIP, Canon Divergence, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Accidental Life Partner Acquisition)
First Love by Kaunakukko (Liitohauki), translation of Первая любовь by AlexVulpinus and Mathew, (M, 109k, JC/LWJ, Memory Loss, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Drama & Romance, Post-First Siege of the Burial Mounds, Translation - English, Original - Russian)
picking up the pieces by KouriArashi (M, 111k, JYL & LWJ, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Alternate Canon, Grief/Mourning, Angst, Regret, Family, Kid Fic, Families of Choice, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Politics, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Canon-Typical Violence, canon typical political bullshit, Eventual Happy Ending) is an AU where Jiang Yanli lives while Jiang Cheng dies. Lan Wangji takes Yuan to Lotus Pier to raise him alongside Jiang Yanli raising Jin Ling.
❤️ For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by sami (E, 65k, WangXian, Time Travel, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Yunmeng Shuangjie, Canon Divergence, Asexual JC, First Time, Getting Together, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, [Podfic] Cold read of For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by kisahawklin, Для нас обоих (И время лишь бумажная луна) (Russian translation) by nomuad) I'm not sure if this is exactly what OP it's looking for, as this is a) a time travel fic and b) LWJ defects to the Jiang sect after the Cloud Recesses lectures. But hopefully OP can still enjoy
~*~
11. ITMF a fic where lwj pines/crushes hard on wwx. light hearted and indulgent vibes, preferably modern au but cloud recesses arc also welcome. thank youu @f1sh1ng4gl0ry
every time we kiss i swear i could fly by sarahyyy (T, 2k, WangXian, College/University, Kissing Booths, Misunderstandings, Getting Together, First Kiss, Love Confessions)
How Wei Ying Went from Oblivious Idiot to Shameless Boyfriend in Three Days by misscam (T, 5k, wangxian, Modern, College/University, Getting Together, Humor)
💖 love on 35mm by fakeplasticlily (M, 26k, wangxian, modern au, college/university au, pining, LWJ is BFFs with JYL)
mating rituals by detectorist (E, 16k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, College/University, Humour, Pining, Getting Together, Idiots in Love)
🔒 you’ve ruined my life (by not being mine) by cicer (E, 132k, WangXian, Modern AU, Developing Relationship, Idiots in Love, Awkward Flirting, teenage romance, Shameless WWX, slowburn, Demisexuality, references to lqr’s a+ parenting, references to jfm’s a+ parenting, but we’re gonna get a happy ending ANYWAY, references to yzy’s a+ parenting, Background NMJ/LXC, hints of nmj/lxc/jgy, bottom LWJ in chapter 15)
r/relationships by vespertineflora (T, 8k, WangXian, Modern AU, Social Media, Viral Reddit Post, Pining, Crushes, Friends to Lovers, Awkward Flirting, Romantic Gestures, Romantic Comedy, Love Confessions, Kissing, Happy Ending)
it’s just (aah) a little crush (crush!) by sweetlolixo (T, 9k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Romance, Fluff, Pining LWJ, Humor, Courting Rituals, Teen Wangxian)
~*~
12. For the next itmf I wanted some time travel from post-Canon to the Sunshot campaign, I haven't been able to find anything like this but I'm fairly dure it exists 😢 thank u ♡
🔒 Forget Myself in Memories by geethr75 (T, 10k, JC& WWX, JC & JL, JL & LSZ & LJY & OYZZ, WangXian, LXC & NMJ, JYL/JZX, Junior Quartet Dynamics, Time Travel Fix-It, Juniors travel to the past, Post-Canon, Canon Divergence, double trouble, Past WWX meets future WWX in MXY's body, Past JC meets future JC, Sect Leader JL, Sect Leader OYZZ, Sect Heir LJY, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, JGY dies as Meng Yao, SS and JZN dies, JGS dies, WQ & WN lives, JYL & JZX Lives, Canon doesn't exist anymore, no golden core transfer, No golden core melting, The Juniors save the day, WWX saves the day too, Alternate Timelines)
Lynchpin by ShanaStoryteller (Not Rated, 103k, WangXian, JC & WWX, Time Travel, Fix-It)
Stubborn Shadows by secretlyteo (teobunn) (T, 24k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, comes in at the moment WC dies, Wangxian ducking around with their past selves, LSZ is tired and would like to go home)
Time Travel, Obviously by nirejseki (Not Rated, 1k, Time Travel, Crack)
Whatever it takes by Moonlit_dewdrops (T, 115k, JC & WWX, WangXian, JC & WWX & JYL, JC/WQ, JYL & WQ, WWX & WQ, WWX & JGY, WWX & JZX, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Not Everyone Dies, yunmeng prides, POV JC, POV WWX; WQ & WN live, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, WWX & JC actually communicate, Yunmeng Siblings fluff, But Also Some Angst, Lots of WangXian moments, Protective JC, Protective LWJ, JGS & JXN will die for sure, NMJ Lives, Twin Prides of Yunmeng Feels, Slow burn but not for Wangxian, Brotherhood, justice for the wen remnants, JYL & JZX Live, Wen Remnants Live, Cinnamon Roll WN, Canon-Typical Violence, Implied/Referenced Cannibalism, reference to wwx’s suicide, Established Relationship, Torture)
🔒 if you can’t beat them, recruit them by moeblobmegane (T, 228k, Wangxian, NHS & WWX, WWX & WQ, Time Travel Fix-It, Conspiracy, Spies & Secret Agents, Team as Family, Found Family, Burial Mounds, Temporary Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, Pining, Morally Ambiguous Character, Rumors, Politics, Developing Friendships, Good Uncle LQR, Demonic Cultivation, YilingWei Sect)
~*~
13. Hey do yall have any fic recs where wwx needs more recovery after the battle at nightless city at the end of the sunshot campaign? @turtleoftheabyss
Tether by WithBroomBefore (T, 40k, WangXian, SangLi, WWX’s passive suicidality, Canon Divergence, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, WWX Lives, JYL Lives, Golden Core Reveal, Minor Character Death, Canon-Typical Violence, POV JYL, Grief/Mourning, Sunshot Campaign, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Family Feels, LWJ makes friends, Fix-It, Happy Ending)
~*~
14. Hi so do you have any fix where wwx is like a mother to the juniors like he gives motherly advice and is a comfort to everyone and acts like a mother too and the juniors secretly refer to him as their mother or some kind of mother figure @constancebloodstone
~*~
15. Hello! ITMF a fic where wangxian spend at least part of the fic living far away from the cultivation world, something where wwx gets a chance to heal and live away from all the politics and drama.
Thank you so much for all the work you do! I’ve found so many wonderful fics scrolling though this blog, you’re amazing!!
💙🔒Away from Trouble by Ilona22 (M, 15k, WangXian, Not JC Friendly, LWJ/WWX Get a Happy Ending)
Discarded by teawater (E, 187k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Dying Lan children, Hurt/Comfort, YL WWX, Golden Core Reveal, Case Fic, Depression, Family Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Worth Issues, Angst with a Happy Ending, and it’s not always dark, POV Multiple, BAMF WWX, dubious morals in the Lan sect Feels, Pining, Grief, Fix-It, BAMF LWJ)
And They Have Escaped The Weight of Darkness by cosmicmilktea (T, 10k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Amnesia, Memory Loss, Grief/Mourning, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Screw the Cultivation world tbh, The Lan precepts deserves better, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, domestic life, Social justice boyfriends wangxian, Happy Ending) These next two may also work but Wei Ying develops amnesia in both and doesn't remember his past
🧡 the river brought you here by chilianxianzi (Not Rated, 11k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, POV Outsider, Amnesia, Past abuse, Strangulation, Found Family) These next two may also work but Wei Ying develops amnesia in both and doesn't remember his past
wide enough and wild by impossibletruths (E, 64k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Getting Together, Canonical Accidental Baby Acquisition, Families of Choice, References to Depression, Happy Ending, I Swear To God I’m Giving Them A Happy Ending, Overzealous Use Of Imagery, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Well Except WN But He Was Already Dead So, Fix-It of Sorts, [Podfic] Wide Enough and Wild by semperfiona_podfic (semperfiona))
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16. ITMF where peoplw found out/relized that the resentful energy is the one that keep WWX alive or functional. Thanks
The Core Issue by Hauntcats (T, 21k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not JC Friendly, Canon Divergence)
❤️ three surgeries and a mercy kill by MarbleGlove (T, 11k, medical procedures, fix-it, Demonic Cultivation, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Self-Indulgent, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies)
🧡 decay by antebunny (G, 15k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, Misunderstandings, Miscommunication, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, the fluffiest ending, Hurt/Comfort)
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17. Hi, I'm hoping that someone has recs of mxy being pregnant before bringing back wwx, so when wwx comes back he is pregnant
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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***
#wangxian#mdzs#wangxian fic recs#i'm in the mood for a fic#the untamed#wangxian fic search#wangxianficfinder#long post
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A GO Season 3 Fanfic Friday
Hello fandom fam,
First let's get a few things out of the way - I believe the victims, and always have - they deserve justice and what happened with GO S3, I hope, is only the beginning. Having a 90 minute series finale instead of an entire season stings, but if it protects vulnerable people and gives consequences for a sexual predator, then it is what HAS to happen. We can be sad, but we must remain enraged at the actual cause, and him alone.
NOW. This is a fanworks blog, so I feel compelled to shout from the rooftops - There are COUNTLESS SEASON 3 SPECULATION/POST SEASON 2 FANFICS OUT THERE. And I know there is a population of the fandom who avoids them because they don't want to be disappointed (I was this person) - but guess what! YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ANYMORE.
So dig in, let loose, read every bit of Season 3 fic as your heart desires and choose the one you love the most as your version.
Here are a few of my favorite completed Post Season 2 works that have stayed with me:
Please note - Now, I've not read as many post season 2 fics as others, and there are a few giants that are not on here, and that's not to say anything about the quality of those works at all. I am just a human, with my own tastes and things I gravitate towards and things I shy away from.
Most canon compliant:
Factory Settings - the original and the best with an air of mystery that makes it almost magical. This is the closest to canon season 3 story I've read. The gist is after Aziraphale returns to Heaven he finds the Starmaker standing in front of him in Crowley's clothes, with no recollection of his life as a Demon. It's a beautiful story that if you haven't read yet, you should.
Sexiest:
We Can't Keep Meeting Like This by @gingiekittycat - if you want to read the sexiest, angstiest, heart-breakingest version of Season 3 imaginable, this is it. I LOVED this story, but I love this type of angst, so proceed with caution. Aziraphale and Crowley meet once a year to discuss the Second Coming, but instead of planning they keep having sex. There is a fully blown plot driven story here that is so great. When you're ready to handle heavy angst and the hottest smut around, read this.
Funniest:
Trial & Error by @fellshish - Fellshish is my favorite author to read when I need to smile, and Trial & Error is a fantastic post season 2 fic if you need some levity and a lot of heart. The plot is simple - Crowley is brought to Heaven to face charges that he engaged in trying to tempt an angel. The way Fellshish writes Crowley is one of my favorites: carrying himself with both his heart on his sleeve while also maintaining an unwavering amount of self worth and confidence, even if it's fragile. Crowley knows who he loves, and he knows who he is, and I find the balance of the two is rare in post season 2 fics.
Fics by lesser known authors: I always like to highlight the works of a few lesser known fics because our fandom is overflowing with amazingly talented people. So here are a few I've read that stood out despite not being as popular as the ones above.
The Beginning of the End (Again) by @addledmongoose - a sweet post season 2 story that focuses on Crowley being employed by Hell to stop the Second Coming by showing Jesus around Earth and trying to convince him not to end the world. Supreme Archangel Aziraphale hears about these clandestine rendezvous and is...jealous? The characters in this are spot on, paying respect to both Aziraphale and Crowley. Some angst, but not much, and lots of sweetness. And BAMF Aziraphale coming in strong to save the day. I definitely hoped for some jealousy from Aziraphale around Crowley and Jesus' relationship in season 3, and since that's not looking likely now, this fic will always hold a special place in my heart.
A Place for the End of the World by @kitty-kat-undercover - another tender and unique take on a Season 3. The premise is, after Aziraphale returns to Heaven the Second Coming is happening fast, so Crowley heads to an old friend's house in deep rural Canada to spend the end of days time. The characters have a ton of heart with some really lovely OCs that rounded out the story nicely. The prose in this one are the standout, as well as the tender care and time that's taken to paint a picture of the beautiful landscape as well as Crowley's heart. Like a warm cup of cocoa, this one is a slower, sweeter take on a Season 3, but it could be what people need right now. Also, never seen a better take on jealous Aziraphale than in this fic. Raging, angry, jealous Angel.
And because life is short, I'll throw my own in here - Time Marches Forward. More of a sequel to Season 1 than Season 2, if Season 1 ended with the final fifteen. This story follows Aziraphale in Heaven and Crowley on Earth as they march towards the Second Coming. No book of life, no deconstructing what secrets lie in the final fifteen. In addition to Az and C, this story has an angsty and powerful teenage antichrist coping with the knowledge of what he is and how he fits into the world and the upcoming plans for everything to end, a witch contending with knowing she destroyed the key to saving everything, and a Messiah who's been left alone for 2,000 years, waiting for his "big comeback." Lots of plot, in-depth character arcs for everyone involved, an incredible amount of heart, and an actual resolution that includes justice for Heaven, Hell and humanity. This story is very dear to me.
AND IF NONE OF THESE SOUND GOOD - Here you go: Post-Good Omens (TV) Season 2 - there are over 1200 works under this tag.
Go forth and feast, dear fandom friends.
#good omens#good omens fanfiction#good omens season 3 fics#bellisimas fanfic roundup#good omens fanfic recs#cw: sa mention#neil gaiman allegations#tw neil gaiman
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