#I've had my current job for over a year which is a personal record for me so I'm kinda stoked about that

[neverendingford]

,

[taffywabbit]

idk if i'm way off the mark on this, but the way some people are responding to that Guillermo del Toro interview about the decline of studio animation is a bit frustrating to me. specifically the bit where he talks about "emoji animation" and how everything is over-animated and pushed too far and things are rarely allowed to not be ultra-cartoony (y'know, because animation always needs to be marketable to children who are never trusted to have attention spans, right?). like, i think he's generally correct about it! but some folks are taking the wrong message away from that.

i've seen people going off about how "soulless" and "corporate" various recent examples are, and talking about these pieces of media as though they're the result of some kind of personal failing or lack of skill/range on the part of the animators, and it's just like. do people realize that's the only animation you're usually allowed to DO in the industry, unless you get incredibly lucky and land yourself on a project/studio that's unusually cool?

when i was in college for animation it was literally drilled into us nonstop that everything had to be pushed more, that exaggeration was not a guideline or a sometimes-treat but a hard rule that always had to be applied regardless of what was going on, because the viewer couldn't be trusted to pick up on subtlety and we sure as hell couldn't be trusted to convey it. you ever wonder why there's such a specific vibe to a lot of self-directed student films, particularly ones that are focused on character acting/interaction or deep emotions and introspection (especially when there's minimal/no dialogue)? it's because for a lot of young animators, they haven't had the freedom to experiment with realism and subtlety up to that point and they're likely not going to have it again for a while (or at all, unless their career path leads to higher positions where they might have more creative direction over the things they work on. which also becomes a lot less likely if they're anything other than a cishet white dude, for what it's worth).

i would LOVE to see more nuanced, realistic, understated motion and acting in animation. i WANT more characters to be able to express what they're feeling through natural body language and facial cues and for scenes to allow me to breathe instead of spelling everything out in giant bold flashing text all the time. what del Toro wants to see changed in the animation industry sounds great, and i hope others join him in seeking to revamp what modern animation is allowed to be.

but as things currently stand, and as they've stood for a long while now, most artists doing the grunt work on the shows and movies you see are completely at the mercy of corporations and networks who have a vested interest in producing a very specific kind of marketable and cost-efficient media all the time. (and by extension that style is ALSO what's taught in most animation schools, because their job more than anything is to grind you down into a perfect little sweatshop worker who will bend over backwards to meet quotas and get your work approved and not question the higher-ups, even if you have little to no personal investment in the projects you're working on, so that the studios who employ you can maintain their good reputations or whatever)

anyways idk what my point was here, this really just sorta became a rant and my views have undoubtedly been coloured by my own personal experiences (this kinda shit is largely why i dropped out before my last year of animation school, for the record).

i guess just be kind to folks in the animation industry? they've had it fucking rough nonstop for well over a century (the majority of them are still not unionized and there's HUGE pushback against doing so in many places). i assure you they are doing their best to infuse the latest uninspired illumination flick or weird spinoff kids' show with literally any amount of soul they can. you don't have to like the stuff that gets produced by any means! be a hater! i'm certainly not gonna stop you. just remember where these creative decisions come from and why these conditions exist, and consider that when YOU watched something and thought "hmm that could've been done better", you can bet your ass someone actually working on it probably thought the same thing but couldn't do anything about it. these things WILL change as the industry itself improves, but in the meantime folks have to pay their rent, and that usually means doing what they're told and working in a way that will minimize revisions and meet quotas so they can keep their jobs. it sucks, but it is what it is.

[livefastdrivefaster]

We Aren't Friends | LN4

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Pairing: Lando x Fem!Driver

Summary: Finding out what Lando really thinks about you.

Word count: 1.7k words

Note: This is the first thing I've ever written so I hope it's not completely awful! Bit of fluff (some angst and swearing).

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Media duties were one of the most tedious parts about your job as a Formula One driver. Every race week, you were forced into doing hundreds of interviews, shuttled in front of one camera and then another. Today was a driver’s panel, and there were a select few of you in a room full of reporters waiting to ask questions. You sat on the edge of the stage, with Alex, Zhou, Lando and Valtteri filling the remaining seats. 

“Let’s open up to the floor for questions.” The host of the session states. 

Instantly, every reporter shoots their hand into the air, starting their voice memos, checking through their notes. Just as the actual racing is competitive, the media around Formula One is especially cutthroat. You need to fight for attention in these types of events. One woman in the second row stands out in particular, and the host singles her out to ask the first question. 

“My question is for Ms Y/L/N.” The reporter states. You lean forward in your chair, smiling at the woman. Reporters often direct their questions to specific drivers, and you were frequently asked questions about your experience being a female driver, or something similar to that general theme.

“In Formula One, they say the higher you rise, the sharper the knives. As your car is particularly competitive this year, have you found that rivalries with other drivers are also being felt off the track?”  It was an interesting question. It was true that politics were constantly rife in the paddock, but you never felt that scrutiny on a personal level. You smiled politely, and held the microphone to your mouth to answer the question. 

“I wouldn’t say so, no. It’s easy to think that with the amount of drama that happens during the races, it will follow us to the paddock. But in the end we are professionals, and we can handle the competitiveness maturely. Even with my toughest rivalries, I can assure you we are friends off track.” You smile, setting down the microphone to signal you had finished talking. 

There were murmurs of agreement in the audience, and your fellow drivers on stage nodded to affirm your statement.

“But,” the woman starts again, “currently, there is a battle between you and Lando Norris for third in the driver’s championship.” 

You nod, staring expectantly at the woman, wondering where she is going with this. 

“Yesterday in an interview with Sky Sports, he went on record to say,” she paused to look at her notes, before saying “‘With Y/N Y/L/N, I wouldn’t say what we have is a friendship, no.’” She finished. 

You feel your heart breaking into pieces.

“Really?” you ask, genuinely surprised. You look over to Lando across from you, noticing how he isn’t even looking back at you. He’s staring at his shoes, motionlessly. He couldn’t even look at you.

“Right… noted.” You finish, voice laced with venom.

Another reporter stands up.

“What do you think about that, Y/N?” He asks. 

You quickly snap out of your intense stare at Lando, turning to face the reporter on the other side of the room. 

“Well,” you say, forcing a laugh to diffuse the tension in the room “my feelings are hurt.” You shrug, maintaining a fake smile for the cameras. Thankfully, the room doesn’t linger on the moment for long, the host moving onto a new question.

You slouched in your chair, wishing you could just melt away to nothing. Your cheeks were burning a shameful red, which you hoped wouldn’t show up on the hundreds of pictures that are currently being taken of you. 

“Not friends?” The question swirled in your mind, plaguing your every thought. You couldn’t understand why Lando would say that about you. Everything seemed fine between the two of you. You never argue, you hang out whenever you can. And when you can’t, you’re texting or FaceTiming each other. You just didn’t get it. 

The rest of the room blurred in your periphery as you played with your hands in your lap. You felt a burning sensation in your eyes as tears threatened to fall down your face. But just as quick as the tears formed, they were quickly washed away by a strong sensation of anger taking over your body. All the time you spent together meant nothing to him. 

What a dick. 

___

As soon as the host called the session over, you put your microphone down and got up to leave. You were the first to go, storming out of the room as elegantly as you could. You exited into a service corridor, knowing that you could sneak around any media personnel looking for more questions from you here. 

“Y/N!” You hear a voice call from behind you. It was Lando. 

“Y/N!” He calls again, footsteps picking up in speed as he races to get to you. 

When he catches you, he gently takes your wrist, using the motion to turn you around to face him. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. About what happened back there, I’m sorry she embarrassed you like that.” He said breathlessly

“Oh, she was the one who embarrassed me?” You spat at Lando

“It was out of context, Y/N. I didn’t mean it like that, I swear.” He said, desperately trying to reason with you

“Then why didn’t you say something? You just sat there, staring at your feet.” You shot back at him

“I should’ve.” He sighed, searching your eyes for forgiveness.

“Oh. So you’re not only not my friend, you’re also spineless. Good to know, Lando.” You reply, shaking your wrist from his grip. 

Lando stands there, dumbfounded, watching your figure retreat down the hall. He wants nothing more than for you to look back at him, just for a moment, just to see your face. But you won’t, and the noise of the exit door slamming behind you snaps him out of his stare. 

“I’m such a fucking idiot.” He whispers to himself. 

_____

Throughout the rest of the weekend, Lando tried desperately to get you to notice him. He would watch you longingly as you fulfilled media duties, got in your car, out of your car, walked around the paddock, took pictures with fans. He would appear randomly while you were eating, or taking a break. He would include himself in conversations you were apart of. 

You rebuffed each of his attempts for attention with an incredibly polite cold shoulder. You were hurt, and he actually hadn’t apologised to you yet. He had texted you a few times asking to talk, but this race was too important to focus on resolving petty drama. You’d call him once it was all over. Maybe. 

Well, that’s what you had been telling yourself all weekend. But now it really was over, and you still hadn’t called him. 

The good thing about racing in Monaco was that you could actually sleep in your own apartment during the weekend, which was a rare and welcomed occasion. It was late, but you couldn’t sleep, your mind coming back to Lando every time you tried to close your eyes. It felt weird not talking to him, you kept each other sane during times like these. But now he wasn’t here for you, as he had been for so long, and you felt like a piece of you was missing. 

As you crawled out of bed to watch something on TV, you heard a sharp knocking at your door. You were hoping it was just someone at the wrong door, until you heard the knocking again. It was more desperate now, the rhythm becoming more sloppy. 

“Hello?” You called out, receiving more knocking as a response. 

You mutter obscenities to yourself as you put on more appropriate clothing, and trudge to the door annoyed. 

“Yes?” You say, swinging open the door.

It was Lando. He looked dishevelled. His curls were tousled and his eyes had deep bags underneath them. They were slightly puffy, as if he’d been crying. 

“Y/N, I can’t do this.” He exclaimed, stumbling into your apartment. You let him in, closing the door behind him. 

“Can’t do what Lando?” You ask, crossing your arms across your chest. 

“I can’t fight with you like this. I can’t not talk to you, I can’t be apart from you.” He stumbles over his words, and you see his eyes well up with tears. You instantly soften your gaze, pulling your arms from their defensive position.  “Lando…” Your voice trails off. You take his hand in yours and lead him to your couch to sit down. Even when you are both comfortable, he doesn’t let go.

“I am so, so sorry Y/N. I was so stupid in that interview, I got way too carried away with what I was saying.” He says slowly.

“What were you even trying to say, Lando?” You ask gently, appreciating finally receiving an apology from him. 

“Well- I meant what I said. What we have. It isn’t really a friendship, is it?” He responds, voice gaining confidence. 

“Something less?” You question, and he smiles in disbelief. 

“Something more, Y/N. We are so much more than friends.” You sit back in your seat, but he moves closer to you. 

“What- what do you mean?” You hesitate, watching Lando’s warm brown eyes glimmer in the moonlight. 

“You know exactly what I mean.” 

Something inside you clicked. All these years, there was an electricity between the two of you. You never let yourself think that way about him, worrying how a relationship with him would affect your career. But right now, you don’t care. You just want him. 

You didn’t say anything, but leaned towards him. He leaned in further, gently cupping one hand around the side of your face, and placing the other arm around your waist to anchor himself. His broad figure covered you completely, and you closed eyes while trying not to smile. His lips were so soft against yours, the scent of his cologne making you feel dizzy. His body felt warm as he pressed his torso against yours. You bucked your hips up, making him groan against you. He pulled his hand up, running his fingers through your hair as he moved down to kiss your neck and collarbones. You giggled at the tickling sensation, and he tentatively pulled away from you, taking a chance to fully admire your face. 

“I like this way more than being friends.”

[brightlypainted]

I went completely bananas and wrote a full analysis of Joker Out and JO fandom stuff and situation... idk

Hi baby boos!

I’ve seen some confusion regarding JO’s latest announcements and social media activity (or lack thereof) so I've tried to analyze the current situation with a critical eye 🤓

I don't use Tumblr much so you're probably more familiar with my Twitter but I got suggested to post this here for easier reading (and... better audience in general 👀)

Long rant under the cut:

Before I begin I must point out that these are my opinions and theories. I have no idea how JO’s communication and management is being organized right now, I’m just making assumptions based on my perception as a fan 🤷‍♀️

(also I’m a communication graduate but my studies and current job cover this sector only tangentially so I may not know how some/most of this works…)

Let’s start with comparing last year’s situation to the current one: one year ago the boys were riding high on the wave of enthusiasm, having had a successful ESC (despite the ending placement) and having gained a lot of attention as fan favorite competitors ✨

A very high % of the growing fanbase, esp the international one, was coming directly or tangentially through ESC and how do you maintain that attention once the contest is over? you increase your social media presence and you start planning international concerts. which they did!

This constant exposure to content made the fandom flourish: we were all witnessing how easily people from everywhere could join and already feel at the very center of attention, both because JO’s communication was being very active and successful and also thanks to fanmade organizations like JokerOutSubs, group chats, old time Slovenian fans sharing juicy pre-ESC content, etc. I'll be grateful forever

We had a past year that could be divided into 2 halves in terms of communication: it all went extremely well until more or less the end of 2023 (last tour dates in Spain) and then started gradually becoming very odd and chaotic all through 2024 until last month’s complete draught

We know that they mostly tend to manage their online presence on their own, so ofc during breaks and during very busy times is harder for them to find good content to share. They had also been very clear about needing time off their phones all through the London era and the album recording in Hamburg, so that didn’t come as a surprise for fans 🤷‍♀️

But having very sensible, personal reasons to quit/decrease social media presence has unfortunately no meaning in communication, where the laws are very simple: once you stop sharing, you stop existing

I don’t want to criticize their choices, because they are entitled to their privacy and offline time. I’m just pointing out that this very long, hiccup-y period probably could have been avoided with better management and with the presence of a smm/pre-planned sm communication 🙃

It also unfortunately happened concurrently to the new ESC season, which was bound to “organically” erode part of the fandom anyway, and to an EU tour that, although successful, has still highlighted a lazy/bad management and yet again a communication that made little to no sense at times (es. the whole campaign that subtly asked people to go to more than one concert, which clearly made fans with less financial and logistical possibilities feel ‘lacking’ and ‘inferior’) 🙄

In their defense, the tour was to establish a fanbase more than gaining more fans and exposure, so pushing for getting more of a loyal than an occasional fanbase wasn’t completely wrong an idea… it just backfired

And it did because the greatest part of their international fanbase is made of very young people who aren’t financially independent and whose interests are bound to be fleeting and shifting ESPECIALLY when they aren’t constantly met with content production/consumption

Let’s also not forget that having completely shifted their attention to international waters at the expense of the Slovenian/regional fanbase has been very risky. We still can’t tell if the gamble was successful or not

It’s never a good idea to ignore/neglect your hardcore supporters, the very people that helped you raise to your current standards. it’s true they are the most loyal, but they are also very easily the ones that could feel more betrayed

I also think it’s very risky trying to shift the fans’ content consumption out of social media and into a (controlled, easier to manage, ofc) site like Openstage for two main reasons: as said before, complete disappearance from socials means communicational suicide and until now, the “dedicated content” directed toward fans on the site has been… too bland and generic (sorry)(they can learn how to improve that)

Openstage has other very interesting uses tho, firstly the early access to ticket sales and secondly the tracking of international fan presence, which was pretty clearly the main goal and reason why they opened the site in the first place... so it’s not ex ante a bad communication choice, just (until now) one that has yet to show its potential and usefulness

So what now? I think it’s time they make a few considerations and sensible choices to maintain what’s currently the status quo and in order to tackle festival season in the best way

They need to keep their international presence by opening their fanbase to a new kind of fans: festivals bring exposure to bands from a very specific type of fanbase, more interested in music than in contents. If they manage to capture the interest of Sziget people, for example, they could gather a new type of international fanbase less interested in the “social media” content consumption and more in the “I wanna see these guys play again, somewhere else, maybe a show of their own” way

(which, to be completely fair, could be the best choice to cure their current crazy/shifting/confusing fanbase state, giving them more peace of mind, more privacy and a more “normal” rock band experience than the one they had in the past year… that we can all agree has been pretty bad at times)

I personally think this summer season must go in the quantity direction (gaining more new fans) and at the same time in the quality direction (less shows, bigger stages) and this is why some of you are disappointed in seeing so little shows compared to last year or to the SYS tour... I get it

Many of us, me included, won’t be seeing JO live for the whole summer season, and I’m aware that is disappointing, but I hope this analysis has helped you put things into perspective and consider maybe one of the possible reasons why this next phase for Joker Out is being organized this way

I’m still hoping they’ll find a good compromise with their social media communication, because right now I really feel that being the main issue with the gradual but constant drop in traction (please boys hire a smm. i adore jan’s sad edits and the unhinged video and stories like the next person but serious work has to be done too)

Ending the rant on a note of hope: I wish to see you all enjoy the summer and the content to come and I hope for the boys to have a successful, fun season full of new experiences, new music, new people, fresh ideas for the future. I’m honestly very excited for what’s to come! 🌻

[wejusthereforthefanart]

I've Rediscovered Meet The Robinsons

And now I'm going to make it everyone else's problem by shoving my headcanons in your faces. *And you're going to like them.*

The Framagucci siblings have gone no-contact with their toxic parents. Evidence? Well, I don't have any, I just like the idea that Lewis yearned to be a part of a loving family and fell in love with a girl who grew up in a family with not-so-loving parents.

Art is the oldest, Gaston is the middle child, and Franny is the baby. I can picture Art having a job in high school in order to help pay the bills, which then shaped his work ethic and gave him a passion for his current job. Unfortunately, that also made him a bit of a workaholic.

Gaston was never considered a "forgotten" middle child, as he made sure he got the most attention from the whole town. He's even a record holder for "most banned citizen", as he's prohibited from most of the local stores and restaurants.

Franny is one of the only family members with a criminal record, after she incited a riot in a concert hall when the conductor tried to step on her frog, Frankie. Gaston insisted on putting a printed copy of her mugshot into the family scrapbook.

Bud and Lucille only argue about one thing during their entire marriage--the pronunciation of the word "pecan". It had gotten so intense that Bud spent a week sleeping on the couch, until they both forgot what they were fighting about.

Cornelius and Billie have bonded over their time spent in orphanages. While Cornelius shared his feelings about being abandoned as a baby and never understanding why his mother left him on the doorstep, Billie confided in him about how her parents had regularly dumped her at an orphanage throughout her childhood, whenever they "needed a break". Once she turned eighteen, she left their house for good and began train hopping across her home country.

Tallulah's love for history was Cornelius' original motivation to inventing the time machine, and he allowed Laszlo to help design the prototype so he didn't feel left out.

While Fritz' puppet, Petunia, is modeled after his late wife's appearance, her personality has since become angrier and more tumultuous due to his grief upon her passing. She has even scared off several therapists over the years.

Joe runs a fitness blog in which he reviews workout videos, offering advice to improve the instructors' lessons. While he didn't pursue a career with it, he has a master's degree in kinesiology.

Laszlo and Tallulah have a former step-mother, who the family avoids talking about to the point that Wilbur still has no idea she exists. Her relationship with Fritz ended poorly.

Wilbur started his own conspiracy theory about himself being a time traveler, which many people over the years have believed and discussed online.

Spike and Dimitri are, in fact, related to one side of the family. Which side? Doesn't matter.

[blackbackedjackal]

I've been fortunate enough to have a family that's generally supportive at best or indifferent at worst to my taxidermy/vulture culture hobby. I work mostly on roadkill birds as that's really all I can do in my city and in my current setup, and I personally believe it is far more respectful for these animals to preserve them or parts of them rather than just tossing their remains into the garbage. I love animals, and I have a special soft spot for pigeons, which is why I do the work that I do.

However, I will never forget that when I first brought it up to my parents, my dad thought it was appropriate to say "Guess we'll have to start calling you Jeffrey Dahmer."

My brother-in-law is the one who'll make the "don't go killing any animals" joke which I really hate :/! The rest of my family is pretty supportive thankfully. I can't stand the serial killer stereotype that gets so casually thrown around though. Like that's a serious allegation and nothing to joke about in general, let alone about someone's profession. Hell, several years ago, I was accused of skinning cats in the apartment complex I lived in and had to pursue legal action for slander. The complex had a terrible feral cat problem and any friendly cats I saw I would catch and take to the shelter I volunteered at, which I was on record for since I had to sign over every cat. It's just so insulting.

I care so much about every animal I work on. It's not a task I take lightly. Like I may joke or kid around sometimes (I'll admit the job does give you a morbid sense of humor), but when I'm focused and in the zone the only thing I care about is making sure the animal I'm working on is processesed with the utmost care. I don't care how big or small or rare or common they are, they all deserve some form of respect in death, and that includes respecting the people doing the actual preservation work.

[thelaurenshippen]

I'm just a starting writer, I did a little nanowrimo this year and wrote 39k words about a vampire gamer, I've always been a vampire girl, but here's the thing I don't know what to do with it.

Currently I'm unemployed for a variety of reasons but I'm lucky enough to have a partner who has a salary that can support us both.

But also I love writing, all my life I just wanted to write and being unemployed this year during nano gave me the opportunity to try and do that.

And now I'm curious is there a way to get paid to be a writer? Not as a marketing copy writer but a fiction writer, or essayist?

So what does one do?

Should I just publish whatever I wrote on a blog and put up a donation button?

Should I just publish on Tumblr?

Should I do it on AO3/Wattpad?

I'm at a loss.

I also don't have social media only use Tumblr and a little BlueSky after twitter exploded, and I really don't want to go and "build an audience on TikTok and booktok" (please gods no).

ah, yes, the eternal question: "how do I make money as a writer?"

I wish I had a good answer. I wish I had any answer. and I would love for other writers on here to chime in with their perspectives, because I am constantly struggling to answer this question for myself!

to answer the specific questions first: there are websites that post jobs for writing gigs - fiction, essays, etc. the one I'm most familiar with is upwork, though I've never gotten a job myself through there so can't speak to the experience. I will say that writing jobs tend to be in high demand and writing in general can be quite competitive, so working on your resume and improving your craft is an important thing to do whether you're just starting out or have been writing professionally for years.

self-publishing is absolutely an option! if you do, I would recommend getting a beta reader (or just a few friends) to read through your manuscript before you publish - it's always good to get feedback and to get other eyes on your work, no matter how complete or polished, for typos/grammar/formatting/etc. I'd also recommend reading about the best ways to self-publish - again, I can't personally speak to this as my three novels were traditionally published, but I know that folks publish through Amazon a lot and there certainly have been successfully novels (and especially graphic novels!) that have started out as blog posts/blogs. I don't recommend publishing an original story to ao3 or Wattpad if you're hoping to make money (if you're publishing for fun, go for it!) - ao3, my beloved, is an archive and therefore does not allow you to link to any kind of patreon/kofi/etc., so can be difficult to monetize. I'm less familiar with Wattpad, but I do know that they are actively trying to get into the publishing game themselves and sometimes pluck stories from their site to bring up to trad publishing, which I've heard can be....a mixed bag.

but there are a lot of authors on here and on their personal websites writing about self-publishing, so there's definitely better info out there about how to do it and how lucrative it can be!

a very good rule for self-publishing imo - whether that's through a site like amazon, your own blog, a podcast, a webcomic, whatever - is always give people the option to pay you. so, yes, put that donation button up. it doesn't matter if no one has read or listened to your thing yet, just making sure the option is there from the start is a good thing!

that's about the extent of the straightforward answer I can give you. if I were to give you a step-by-step guide of how I got to a place where most of my income comes from fiction writing, it would look like this:

write your own fiction podcast, get some actors from acting class to come over to your apartment and record for free, and produce the whole thing yourself

publish said podcast and then spend the next 2 years spending as much time on social media, at conventions, conferences - anywhere there are fiction podcast fans and creators - as you can talking about your show, all while writing and producing the show for free

get lucky and have the show take off. start to get some ad money that allows you to pay your collaborators. watch the show get better as a result. see the show take off even more. keep grinding away at social media

get a cold email from a book agent who wants to talk to you. convince that book agent to represent the YA novel you want to write in the world of your podcast

expend whatever leftover energy you have on ensuring that when people think of fiction podcasting, they think of you, even if other names are coming first. be everywhere. talk to everyone. keep grinding away at social media.

get a cold email from a fiction producer in England who wants you to write on his show. convince him to let you co-showrun it with him.

use your growing network of audio friends to get an agent and manager. use those people to get a pitch to marvel. convince marvel to let you write a podcast for them.

finally quit your day job, after doing 4 seasons of a successful podcast and selling spin-offs to a tech company, getting a 3-book deal with a major publisher, being hired to co-showrun a big budget mystery, and selling a show idea to marvel. then make all of those shows.

finish the podcast you started with, now seven seasons long. try to pitch out other ideas to all the people who wanted to buy that podcast off of you. watch them say no to anything new.

get lucky and sit next to a netflix exec at a dinner. convince her to let you write a stranger things show.

keep pitching. use the money from your other jobs to fund your indie shows. sell one show. lose another halfway through development. have your ideas optioned for television over and over and get used to hearing no's when you go out to pitch. produce and direct as much as you can to pay the bills. keep grinding away at social media.

????????

profit

that's obviously a simplification of my journey but I'm currently in that ???? stage. I don't say all of this to freak you - or anyone else - out. being a creative is hard. it gets easier in some ways and stays just as hard in others. I'm better at my job than I used to, so making shows is easier, but getting jobs and getting audience feels as hard as ever, even if I am several steps ahead than where I started. I thought I could build off the success of @thebrightsessions to make my other originals instant successes and that's just not how it works at all. you're building from the next step up after every success, not the top of the staircase.

but, like I said, I'm not trying to scare you - the thing that's positive in my weird crazy journey is the reality that there is no one right way to do something. there's a million different ways to make a creative career, especially in the age of the internet. which means that my advice to anyone who asks me how to start a career in audio fiction specifically is: just do it. don't wait for someone to give you a budget, don't try to cater to what you think the AD audience wants, just tell your story as you want to and get it out there. the best job application is being able to point to your own original work that's already garnered an audience.

I have no idea if that could as readily apply to prose writing/publishing. that is definitely beyond my knowledge base, but I'd say if you want to get a taste for what it's like to be a freelance creative, apply to jobs on upwork or similar sites, work on your original work, and find a platform that works for you on which you could potentially build an audience. and then get to know as many people as you can in your given field - I would not be where I am at all without folks like Gabriel Urbina, or Jeffrey Cranor, or Jenny Turner Hall. making friends in audio drama from the start who could recommend me for jobs - and being sure that I do the same now that I have more power - is vital. make friends with your peers (also bc they're great and you'll learn so much from them).

finally, I want to pass on advice that my uncles gave me when I was a teenager wanting to go to broadway--both of them work in musical theater (one conductor, one musical director, they are quite the power couple and my heroes) and when I was growing up, they told me "if you can think of anything else that will make you just as happy, do that instead". it sounds like harsh advice, but it's good advice. people don't pick creative careers because it's easy and stable--if there's anything else you're equally passionate about that could make you money and be more stable, there is absolutely nothing wrong in pursuing that and then writing for the love and joy of it, without the pressure of making a living. and that doesn't mean that that won't eventually lead to you being a successful full-time writer! but choosing to pursue writing full-time because it's what you want to do with your life is a very particular kind of path.

anyway, I've gone on way too long. I hope some of this was helpful - the last-last thing I'll say is that a) I obviously have a very limited perspective so nothing I say here is the be-all-end-all way of viewing things b) I had a very stable data entry job while I was making my first show that was very flexible and work-from-home (oh, to be able to get that job back now...since the pandemic, those types of jobs are obviously in high demand) and c) I got lucky. luck and timing are, unfortunately, a huge part of success in creative careers. if anyone tries to sell you on the idea that there's a guaranteed path to success that you can control if you work hard enough, they are lying to you and probably want you to buy something.

finally-finally, a vampire gamer story sounds so fun!! I love that idea!

[paulinedorchester]

A question for people who are on Facebook (which I'm not): Is it as bad as it looks? And how is Facebook Marketplace as a sellers' platform?

(This is a bit of a shaggy dog story. Please bear with me.)

When my mother died in 2016, she left a will naming me as the heir to all of her property, but which didn't spell out what that property consisted of. She also left a vast array of personal effects in such a complete state of disorder that I'm still making discoveries, the most recent of which is that I've inherited four burial plots at a cemetery in Woodbridge, New Jersey, more than 800 miles (almost 1300 km) from where I live, but only about 30 miles from New York City, where she was born and raised. (She inherited them from my grandmother, who in turn inherited them from my grandfather, who spent part of his childhood on a farm in that area. As I've mentioned, most of my great-grandparents emigrated to this country for the specific purpose of farming.)

I had about six weeks of wrangling with the cemetery staff, who were initially unwilling to admit that there was any record of anyone in my family ever having owned grave sites there. Last week I finally pulled out the big guns — that is, I used the word "attorney" in a sentence — and within ninety minutes they had miraculously located the record of my mother's ownership and acknowledged me as the current owner.

Now they're telling me that it will be impossible for me to sell the plots, and that I should either re-assign them to the cemetery (yeah, right) or donate them to a synagogue in their area. While the latter is a possibility, I want to try to sell them myself first. I've found sales listings for plots in the same cemetery on five different platforms. It seems to me that I'll need to list this property in at least three of them.

One of them will be eBay. (Of course!)

There are at least two platforms entirely devoted to the sale or other transfer of burial plots, mausoleum vaults, etc. One looks to me like a fly-by-night operation and charges sellers huge fees just to post listings; the other is a little more professional-looking and reasonable, and is a possibility.

The average Tumblrite might not... um, might be too young to remember that back in the 2000s and early 2010s, Craigslist had a reputation as being mainly a place to go to buy sex. I don't know to what extent they've cleaned up their act. In any case, the site seems to be organized so that listings posted in a particular geographic area are seen more or less exclusively by people in the same region, so that's not very useful to me.

That brings us to Facebook Marketplace.

As my followers may have gathered, I'm not a huge fan of social media, and a lot of that has to do with my perceptions of Facebook. To me, it has always looked like a 24/7 cesspit, run by people who simply don't give a shit. But in researching various topics online over the years, I've learned that there's a lot of valuable content on Facebook (content that apparently belongs to Facebook once you post it there? Is that right?), and also that, increasingly, you have to be logged in to Facebook in order to actually look at it. Which means that you have to have a Facebook account — complete with a dashboard and a feed, and people you follow, or whatever it is that one does on Facebook.

Such an account, of course, is something you need in order to use Facebook Marketplace. So I'm asking you: how bad is Facebook, really? And how good is Facebook Marketplace? What is their fee structure like?

And how much trouble is all of this? I'm on LinkedIn; It was a lot of trouble to set up that page, but I did it because I was hoping that it would be helpful to me in finding a job. It has been totally fucking useless, and I'm reluctant to put all of that effort again into something that isn't going to accomplish anything — or that will be, well, unpleasant.

So, what has your experience on Facebook been?

Thanks in advance, as always.

[thesiridahl]

What was your dream job growing up?

For most of my childhood, my dream job was to be a cast member on SNL. I was an EXTREMELY energetic kid (hello, undiagnosed ADHD!), willing to do a lot of weird, kooky stuff to make my friends and family laugh. My nickname in elementary school was literally "druggie," because a lot of kids saw my antics and joked that I must be "smoking crack." 😳 🙄 Ah, the 90s.

By the time I was a teenager, I was still very interested in performing, and I was indeed a theater nerd. But while I loved performing, I couldn't stand the politics of high school theater. I stayed in drama class all through high school, but eventually stopped acting in plays because the joy of drama was getting lost in all of the, ahem, "drama."

I grew up in a very musical household. My dad was a professional opera singer for years, and we had a grand piano in our living room. I sang in choirs all throughout my childhood (later on, I was even in choir for a year at the University of North Texas, which has a fantastic classical and baroque music program). I started taking piano lessons at 5 years old, switched to guitar at 13, and picked up mandolin at 17. I never excelled at any particular instrument, because I never cared much for the technical or music theory side of things. I understood the basics and I could read sheet music, but when I "practiced," I was noodling around with cool sounds and vibes, not pursuing some kind of Whiplash-esque level of craft in musicianship.

Thus, as my adolescent existential dread set in, my "dream job" morphed into being a recording musician. I was constantly writing songs. They weren't necessarily good, but I was prolific, at least.

My teenage years were also when my genetically-predisposed depression began to set in. I was a really, really depressed teenager, but I hid it very well. Except for in my music! All through high school I spent countless nights in school (yes, school nights🙃) where I would stay up until 4 a.m. writing and recording songs on my little digital 4-track. I played a lot of open mic nights and a couple ticketed shows.

This was back in the days of music myspace, and I had a teensy following on there. I made friends with other young indie musicians all over the country (Luke Rathborne and Samantha Crain are two who come to mind, and they're both recording artists to this day 🤗). Other musicians who gave me feedback would often compare my singer-songwriter sounds to some combination of Cat Power, Fruit Bats, and Elliott Smith. That probably gives you a good idea of the depths of my teen angst, LMAO. I stopped writing and recording music when I was in college. I didn't lose interest in music as a hobby, but I lost interest in making it my primary form of creative self-expression. As I got older I realized that music was incredibly personal for me, a tool I used to process my various life experiences, good and bad -- and once I realized that, I didn't really have any interest in pursuing a career in music.

Obviously the common theme with all of this is the element of performance! I've always been a creative extrovert, so to me it totally makes sense that I gravitated toward my current career - especially once I discovered that exhibitionism is a significant component in my personal sexual identity. Being in the adult industry is kind of the perfect combination of everything, because as an adult content creator I have the freedom and the fan base to (mostly) do whatever I want.

[kachawo]

A scp/magnus archives-esque au where Lan Wangji and Jiang Wanyin discover old cassette tapes of status entries, the voice in those tapes... none other than Wei Wuxian, who had gone missing 6 years ago.

This was not the strangest part alone, the entries, the contents-- it all sounds like a madman's dream.

Wei Wuxian spoke about objects or living beings in such a frightening perspective all the while maintaining a calm tone.

"Entry 0096 Subject: 4. Species: Type AD. Further observations have concluded--

Entry 0109 Subject: 12. Species: Type 0. It seems that The Busker is able to mutate--

Entry 0013 Subject: 25. Species: ???. The subject we call "Dean" has shown very interesting-- "

It's all a mystery to the both of them.

What's worse is this-- both Lwj and Jwy know that the man was not some sort of mad-scientist,

He was-- he was a doctor! Wei Ying held down a job in a rehab institute in Yiling for people who where born with deficiencies.

The same Yiling Institute that burned down after the said man had gone missing.

Jiang Wanyin was convinced this was some sick trick that his brother left behind, some fantasy story Wei Ying thought was cool. He knew his brother so well he--

He wasn't the person that Jiang Wanyin heard in those tapes, the voice is different. It's not cheerful or bright-- the Wei Wuxian he knew would not have such a dead voice.

Jiang Wanyin gave up on the hope of finding the man very quickly. 6 goddamn years, and all he got was this.

But Lan Wangji never did.

He hoarded those tapes like a lifeline. Listened to all 26 tapes over and over and over and over-

He felt like he had something. An answer, it was here somewhere he just couldn't find it!

Wei Ying was here, that voice over the recorder was him he knows it.

But Lan Wangji doesn't know why.

Listening to the tapes repeatedly, his hope started to wane. But he held out-- even when his brother called out to him, even when his uncle barked that he was finding a dead man-

And it ended up being very fruitful.

"To the dearest boy I knew, with him my heart grew...

Lan Wangji knew this song, had immortalized it in his heart.

When the voice in the tape sang this... he sounded soft.

How could he have missed it? So eager to devour every word that came out of that voice, he never really stayed long on one tape.

If the recording ended, it usually spared a few minutes of utter silence. He never waits until the end of that silence to switch to another tape.

Which was an utter mistake.

"He sent me to the Lotus Lake, held my hand all day.."

It was such a silly lullaby, and it kept changing depending on its singer's mood.

Oh, how Lan Wangji loved it.

"Oh how it makes me woe, to see my dear boy go.."

"With him my heart stays, while here my body lays."

"Beneath the Lotus Lake."

Shortly after a sad chuckle follows the song.

"Or... should I say beneath the Yiling Lake?"

Lan Wangji's heart dropped.

Once he was sure the recording truly finished, he fished it out the holder and examined it.

"Entry 0123. Clouds." The title on the tape says. It was just the same as the others, Wei Ying would start by describing the subject and go on like he always did.

But now Lan Wangji looks closer.

The date underneath it says 08/24/1997. Exactly 6 years before Wei Ying went missing.

His eyes grow large at the realization--

Lan Wangji remembers very clearly, in the recording Wei Ying had said--

"It is currently 12 pm of January 23. I do realize that I've missed the chance to greet a Happy New Year but oh well--

Who am I kidding? It's not like anyone will find these tapes anyways. Devices like these are old to the new generation. In the 21st century no one's even gonna recognize these silly things."

21st century

Wei Ying had gone missing in the 20th

It filled Lan Wangji with hope and fear.

He's still out there.

But then how did this tape get here? These were retrieved from Wei Ying's old apartment, which has been restricted from being accessed ever since he had gone missing.

Jiang Wanyin and Lan Wangji were allowed to retrieve his stuff only 3 months ago.

The date today was October 30th, 2004.

Why is it that, of all the tapes Wei Ying had recorded, this one was the most up to date?

Especially when the other recordings were within dates that they knew he was still present in their lives?

This was the only recording of him during those missing 6 years.

And it's fresh.

Lan Wangji stumbled, he grabbed his phone on the desk and contacted the only person he knew at that moment.

The phone rang

And picked up.

"Jiang Wanyin, I've found him."

[reilleclan-blog]

Sooooo I gave immortals of aveum a chance and first of all the actor that plays Jak was on a show called "Never have I ever" and at the time I didn't even think about it when I watched the show but that man is currently 33years old. And the person he was kissing and being "sexual" with in the show is currently 22years old..

And yes she obviously is at the age of consent I was just kinda appalled how it was a good idea for casting to have her kissing some guy 10 years older than her.... especially in a acting setting that seems like such a way to take advantage of someone younger b/c well most times younger ppl don't know any better. ("Never have I ever" was also released in 2020. So what she was 20 while he was 30 filming that shit... that's still freshly an adult but she's just casted for kissing a grown ass man. That feels so weird to me.

Maybe the casting was done b/c maybe ppl wouldn't have given the show a shot if he wasn't in it but 33 years old.. holy fuck. And I think he's playing a senior as well and Davy has a crush on him.. (I'm not saying ppl can't date age gap but TO ME it feels super weird to have someone freshly an adult kissing on a grown man while others are recording and u know it's more vulnerable for the woman that's young) I had a 37 year old woman interested in me and at the time I was like 23 and I was so creeped out why she would ever want to date someone that's close to the age of her son.. like please ppl please be careful out there. I've had older women try to take advantage of me sadly.

But yeah yes it's an acting job but like it's so easy for the younger person in these situations to be taken advantage of.

Ok that rant is over, time to talk about the game I mentioned in the beginning. So when I first saw this game I didn't think it was gonna be good cause so many "high end" games have been straight ass. And was I right ? Uhhh I got "Immortals" for free on PlayStation so yeah it was pretty ass. (If PlayStation is putting a game out for free that only been out a year then most times that mean it wasn't good)

The story so far is very very generic like "arcane legends" story telling except arcane is more interesting and ur character has a time skip(in immortals. Side note I'm not a big fan of arcane but I'm just comparing it with this goofy magic shit) sorry lol but yeah the magic in the game is literally like "here's blue magic, ur magic depends on ur strength if u have all colors tri something ur like really special" and surprise the main character has all 3 magic colors?

Aside from the story which wasn't the worst? It's just very boring it felt like what Skyrim felt like except in Skyrim it's more interesting and yeah.. the combat is shoot shoot and "here's some abilities" in the beginning of the game they have u run thru this underground city like showing off the world but all u do is press the jump button a couple times and hold square. To make it feel "traversed" but that's all it was lol. The characters from the beginning were interesting too bad they all (SPOILERS) die

Ok fast forward Jak trains for 5 years and uh yeah. Ur fighting in a war and that's it. I would've loved if the game gave u some sort of fist fighting combat cause ur character has a cool ass melee but that was it. Also I was trying to just play the game for what it was but the game was super choppy on ps5 and there wasn't a setting to change "performance mode" or anything like that. And while in the middle of the story the game crashed.

Uhhhh yeah while running around the game the shit just felt and looked like it was held or made by spit and glue anddd um but it was a quality spit and glue. It gave a feeling of "open world" for like 2 seconds but most areas looked the same almost like "dungeon levels" but even more bland?

Idk uhh I only put like 3-4hrs into the game the limited amount of settings was also super surprising to me. I couldn't even take off motion blur and that was hurting my eyes while the game's frames drop randomly ,can't feel good.

For what I've seen I don't think this game has anything left that's interesting. I think the side characters make up for the game being bland and combat being a bit stale but I got bored fighting wave after wave of enemies, so I had to turn the game off. IF U LIKE THE GAME IM ALL HAPPY FOR U this is just my experience. Please don't start crying cause someone from a corner of the internet doesn't agree with u. Uhh 4.4/10

wtf is 4.4 idk but that's what I'd rate this game id say a 5 but whatever(also why didn't I use images from the actual game I was talking about ? Idk i didn't want to ig and the immortals game sadly didn't have a photomode idk and the game's shit so whatever)

[translucent-at-best]

Scatter-brained...

I can't find the post about the greatest movie deaths to reblog it, but I just want y'all to know that topping my list is Queenie the dog's death in Crooklyn. Also included is Sonny from The Godfather and Samuel L. Jackson's character in Deep Blue Sea.

Life been life-ing like a motherfucker lately. And while some of it is just happening to me through no fault of my own, there is some of it that's also just me dealing with the consequences of my actions. I'm trying to focus on the things I can control, but it's easier said than done.

Death been death-ing like crazy too. From family to friends to friends who are family... This shit don't make no sense.

I'm 33 now. I haven't had a birthday party since I was 9, but I'm planning a birthday brunch for myself next weekend and I'm excited for it. And grateful that I have people to invite and who I know will show up for me. I'm really out here with chosen family. I came out here knowing no one. I might sound like a broken record at this point, but I'll never stop thanking God for that.

Had to kick my roommate's boyfriend out of the apartment a few weeks ago. I'm still shaken up over it. She told me he's not welcome back until I say he is and I told her I don't know if I'll ever be comfortable with that again (read: I absolutely won't be). She says she understands and that that's a consequence he'll just have to live with... but I'm very aware that although she's saying that now, she may not be so understanding on a May 15th or a July 20th or... you get it. I hope I'm wrong, but if she's shown me anything thus far, it's that I can't always believe what she says.

This same boyfriend showed up unannounced at my place last Sunday night to "apologize." We talked through the call box and that was only long enough for me to say (and repeat several times) that I'm not in a place to accept an apology right now. He kept trying to convince me to talk, asking for "a minute of your time" and saying that he's really a good guy.

First off, anyone who calls themselves a "good" person, I'm wary of. I feel like that's the type of thing other people should tell me about you or that I should clearly be able to see for myself through your actions. Secondly, your solution to getting kicked out of some place is to show up to that place unannounced and try to force the person who wanted you out to accept your apology on your time and terms? Fuck all the way out of here. Thirdly, the lack of self awareness it takes to say you understand why what you did (not listening to us when we told you to leave) was wrong, but then to refuse to listen and leave AGAIN as you try to apologize is mind-boggling. Every time I think about it, I end up even more pissed.

I've been closing all my fitness circles nearly every day this month and I'm really proud of me for that. I even went and worked out on my birthday. Who is she?

The economy is a mess, the current job market is big trash, and the non-profit org I work for has fallen on hard times and informed us that there will be layoffs at the end of this school year. I'm applying and have been applying, but finding the energy to keep doing so is draining in a way I don't think I've experienced before.

And, on top of all that, my sleep schedule has been terrible. I thought it was just a side effect of my period this month, but that thing been gone for a minute and I'm still struggling.

April 13th (the day I promised myself I'd get back on a dating app) came and went. I downloaded an app. I created a profile. I consulted friends about which pictures to post and choose... but them fucking prompts? I know I'm supposed to show off my personality, sell myself, etc. I just ain't got the energy right now...

[crayonurchin]

The fact that as a nearly 27 year old woman, I can tell the anxious and depressed teenagers I work with that not only does it get better, but THEY get better, is wonderful. It doesn't fix their issues, it just gives them a view of a future where things have improved.

As a nearly 27 year old woman who's going through her first 'real' heartbreak and breakup, still lives at home, is terrified to try dating or exploration of sexualities and being more open, does not have a full time job or the ability to move out without moving so far away I'd have to quiet my part time entertainment job, has no clue if she'll ever fall in love again or get married or adopt kids and is still struggling with PTSD from stuff that happened in school, work, life and my own untreated for years mental state... Yeah I want the 37 year old me to reach out and show that it'll all get better and I will get better.

But 37 year old me isn't here yet, nor is 27 year old me. 26 year old me, at least, is trying to make better changes.

Yes, I have lost someone I thought I'd marry. It's sad. I miss her. I miss us. I am so happy she's moved on to bigger and better things and I am so sad it didn't go the way I so badly wanted. But one day, I think I'll be with someone who I love and who loves me back, in that intimate way I loved her. We'll geek over special interests, crave each others company without NEEDING it, help each other to keep being our best selves and live our own lives whist living a life together. She will hold me close and I'll feel at home. And I'll look on this experience as a sad but, as something that at least showed me that I can feel love. And that love I did feel was amazing.

Yes I am not in a career and I'm afraid of GETTING that career and not liking it. But I'm also lucky that I like my current weekend entertain work a lot, and it's shown me WAY more skills that I didn't know I even had! I wrote a god damn book. I'm still looking for a publisher but holy shit I wrote an entire book. And I want to write more! I might have freelance coming up and in April I'll be recording my audio drama, which will help me apply to voice based things. YES, it's not a career yet, but I'm so much more qualified than I used to be!

Yes I still live at home. Because fucking hell I have had a ROUGH 20s. I was so mentally unstable for so long and had no idea. I was genuinely ready to kill myself several times. And that's hard to admit. I'm autistic and have ADHD! I need legit help with things others don't! I look high functioning because of my socialising abilities but I can't keep my space clean. I can't do paperwork. I can't remember to talk to people without alarm set reminders. My OCD still rules so much of my life, my PTSD age regressed me. I'm only just learning to experience anger and jealousy without beating myself up.

Yes. It's hard to believe anyone likes me. I feel so unlikable and boring and annoying. And I know that's almost certainly not true. I have friends. I have new friends. I have a... sort of crush, maybe. I have family that love me. I have people asking to hang out.

I worry all the time I'm a selfish and evil and cruel and fake person. I want to become a better person and work on my flaws, but also the level of bad I feel is probably because of my OCD.

17 year old me thought she was a murderer. Spoiler. I wasn't. I was mentally unwell and suffering with OCD that gave me intrusive thoughts.

I know some of my changes are good. I've started feeling that autistic euphoria from a special interest again. Today I drove home from a gig, and the sky kept producing the most 'shaped' clouds. My heart went glowy. I have missed feeling glowy.

One day 37 year old me will be very happy 26 going on 27 year old me tried her best.

[homestuck-vocals]

What’s your opinion on the Broadwaystuck revival?

*I don't follow tags and have been in an "inattentive" phase for a couple months now so I'm not keeping up and idk how much of the following is ACTUALY relevant to this iteration. I do not know annnnything about Broadwaystuck 2023 other than it seems to be another 1:1 casted group. * I've been on record for years as not being a huge fan of the "Broadwaystuck model" where there's an "official cast" where each character is voiced by only one person, other than for a specific project with a deadline such as a musical or planned album. I think that it might result in:

driving away interested parties cause their fave is taken. It's exclusive by design

conflict over casting, which has historically been big drama

lagging collaboration because e.g. everyone wanting a Vriska* number depends on The One Vriska's personal course schedule and workload, not to mention interests and range

similar issues if someone goes inactive without telling anyone, anything regarding that character just comes to a halt and you have to put mod energy into that situation

which is a concern for a project billed as producing things on an *indefinite* basis. there will be turnover, and this model always looks like it struggles with that possibly because of point 1

lots of effort on advertising recasts, auditions, and callbacks, when The One Vriska drops out, *after* you've told all the other Vriska singers that she's taken and they've lost interest

IMO, self-duet like "Past Me, We're Going Down" and the Karkat x Karkat "Loathing" are so much better because there's two voices! I LOVE hearing VAs for the same character together. You don't get that if you've already told all the other VAs for that character to keep walking.

*just picked vriska cuz she's so popular

I have clicked through a lot of dead group blogs where the last dozen posts are repeat attempts to cast and re-cast, and I remember the drama in 2012 about who got to be e.g. Official Broadway Nepeta. And I remember personally applying for Broadway Kanaya in 2012 and then going o well didn't get cast :/ and never trying again. I mean I could have struck out on my own but there's reasons people like to be in a collaborative network for this sort of thing.

I got the sense that it kept being replicated in group after group not because it was functional (original Broadwaystuck lasted like. four? five months? end of 2011 to april? 2012?) but because of how bright it shone, and glittered with (some preexisting) BNFs, while it briefly worked. One of the most common reactions I see in the chat of a listen party I'm hosting is "we should remake Broadwaystuck!". It's undeniable that the project had huge impact. I'm not sure that means that its successor in *impact* will or should operate the same way.

to be fair we apparently did Not At All solve this with whatever we tried with Universe C# after 2019 SAHcon, i think (hope?) in part because Discord is such a clumsy and dark platform for what we were doing. I think it's great that the current project is back on Tumblr, which being on the clearweb (make sure those blogs are search indexed!) is much more accessible to curious passers by than a locked Discord. It's also better than Twitter because Twitter is outright hostile to audio creators. Anyway the ideeeeeea there was that you would record samples for as many characters as you wanted, creating a bank of actors interested in each character as reference for collaboration, plus whatever the hell you wanted to do as an individual, so theoretically you could @tag all the actors for a given character at once for a highly targeted casting call for the specific song you wanted to make!

But this other way of doing things didn't get going. It may be that one of the upsides to the casted model is that there is a sense of a Job To Do that motivates actually producing things more than a casual free for all. I mean, everything I have actually made was because articulatelyComposed needed one more mezzo for a deadline. save for my Candy!Dave "Edges Of The World" that i Do Not Have The Fucking Range For. Chaotic tenors, call me I think the new project has folks with experience on some of those old casted projects so maybe they will iterate on some of the shortcomings. whether my opinion on organization structure is *relevant*? no, i'm not in the group AND folks actually in the group have more direct experience with similar groups than I do. i'm just someone who does data entry as a hobby.

this does all make me want to brush up some of my old WIPs

edit: firsthand feedback on how BS23 works

"part of my job on staff for the project is to set out the base structure of our albums and when songs are released and how in certain cases. we set like… a skeleton of the album we're going to make with a set end point and certain things at certain points (you cant fight the homestuck being track 100 of volume one and thus the album's closing number, track 50 of the current album being beautiful [the song], stuff like that.)

we haven't had any conflict over casting as of yet, least not that I'm aware of. some people dropped out but people drop in too, and people shuffle around based on interest or might volunteer to do a part thats missing from a group number. we've got handling and rules for inactivity and all that. collaborations arent always quick, especially the bigger the group involved, but its not because anybodys got a line or whatever?

this isnt like an official statement but its all technical details so i think its fine."

[tppeportfolio]

Entry 3:

The importance of personal marketing, branding and your unique value proposition. What is your brand and what areas do you need to improve?

From my understanding the importance of personal marketing and branding is due to the increased competition there is when applying for a job, as well as giving yourself the very best first impression to a potential employer. Building a personal brand is a way to  distinguish us from the rest and especially with our unique value proposition we are able to establish a built reputation that we've created for ourselves over our years of experience making us more credible to hopefully advance our careers and build our self-confidence (Montoya, 2002, cited in Khedher, 2014). 

Unique value proposition that I wrote for myself is:

As a UVP in applying for a job  is about defining the value an  individual will create for the company they desire to work for (Harvard Business School, n.d.), I see the UVP I created for myself as a perfect summary of who I am and what I hope to be adding value to  in the industry. 

As mentioned in my previous entry there are still areas of what I consider my brand to be at the moment that need improving and also areas that need to be added to my brand to ultimately make myself the best candidate for the internship. 

My brand would definitely include being a strong people person, emotional and passionate about sport and also strongly valuing other sports fans emotions. My brand will also be about bringing  creativity in content I create  which ultimately is to tell a story of any kind. 

Personally marketing myself is something I also find Significantly more important for myself as I look out and compare myself to other peers in my current degree that may have more industry experience and are looking to enter the same role as I am in the industry in years to come after we graduate. Although I've had my experience with the Subiaco football club a few years ago I see it as only being a taste of what's to come rather than the current and relevant experience that my peers are receiving at the moment. I understand and fully realise the time I have to gain further industry experience before I go into my full-time career is of less time than this time last year. However I know that the first hand professional work experience that this internship placement will give me is unparalleled and will be significantly valuable for my future career endeavours. This is obviously an area that needs to improve In my brand as I can't quite yet say that part of my brand is that I come with a wealth of knowledge and experience.

As a step in the right direction to gaining said experience, I have just recently lined up an opportunity to work for a live sport broadcasting business, that live streams local support and would be the best way for me to gain experience in the operation of cameras and other recording equipment. This ideally will not only look better as the brand I'm presenting to the future employer but it will also give myself further self-confidence to complete my job to the best of my ability. 

References:

Harvard Business School. (n.d.). Unique value proposition. Unique Value Proposition - Institute For Strategy And Competitiveness - Harvard Business School. https://www.isc.hbs.edu/strategy/creating-a-successful-strategy/Pages/unique-value-proposition.aspx#:~:text=A%20value%20proposition%20defines%20the,value%20proposition%20expands%20the%20market. 

Khedher, M. (2014). Personal Branding Phenomenon. International Journal of Information, Business and Management, 6(2), 29-40. https://login.ezproxy.holmesglen.edu.au/login?url=https://www.proquest.com/scholarly-journals/personal-branding-phenomenon/docview/1511120777/se-2

[ray-talks]

1/31/24

today went mostly well.

i had a small portion for my meal and no side dishes. unfortunately though, nothing other than water came out when i tried purging it. i'm not extremely hung up about it because of the size of the meal.

something i've thought about -- and have struggled with in the past -- is being more conscious of liquid calories. it's almost like my brain doesn't register them the same. obviously, i don't go all out and drink anything without restriction. i only drink diet (or generally zero cal) sodas. my general substitute are sparkling ice drinks -- they are only around five calories each. my biggest concern is that i tend to drink too much coffee, which isn't necessarily bad if it is black, but i put creamer in it. sadly, i can't get myself to sacrifice it. it's such a big comfort for me and i have strong cravings for it. i probably crave coffee more than i do food, which i deprive myself of much more. maybe i justify it in my head, because i restrict my food intake just enough, so i can spend a little more on liquid calories and still lose weight. i suppose if this turns out to be hampering my ability to lose weight, i may have to cut ties. for someone like me who is so obsessed with suffering, it's likely ridiculous that i can't bring myself to endure the pain of giving up cream in my coffee (lol).

something i have yet to discuss here is that i have been referred to an electroconvulsive/ketamine clinic. i go along with this simply out of mild curiosity -- and to paint myself as someone who cares about getting help -- but i have full-confidence it will have little to zero effect on me. this isn't even me being pessimistic, and ultimately, hopeless. in fact, i have no investment in alleviating my depression, so it's not something i was hoping for to begin with. i'd rather prefer it not change me, otherwise, it would negatively impact my goal. i guess it could be argued if it did do something, i would not care as much about my goal. but as of right now, i do not feel this way. maybe this isn't how it works, but i believe if i have no desire to recover, that it will not do much. the reason this gives me pause anyway, is that i may not have any control over an utter shift in my brain chemistry -- so perhaps, there is a possibility i'll completely change. i don't count on it, though. i've been through countless medications -- i am even currently taking six (embarrassing, right?) -- and it is pretty evident that i am still mentally fucked. so, i've endured other things that change my brain chemistry with little to no traditionally positive results.

a question i posed to my therapist today was, "is it a win for me to be alive, even if i am perpetually miserable?". their answer was essentially no and that it would be quite terrible -- of course, outside of the slight chance of change that is only permissible with life. i wonder if this will be my fate, if i don't commit or fail to, that i'll still be alive in five years, but i'll be the same as i am now. i think i've become increasingly more apathetic about my lack of happiness, so this may not necessarily be the most nightmarish scenario for me, but it does make me worry about how burdensome i will be to others. i wonder about my capacity to be independent, hold a job, or not be in-and-out of the hospital. if these are an impossibility, that horribly burdens my family. i may sound like a broken record, because i think i've said this multiple times, but it conflicts me that my self-destructive nature is destructive to others too, particularly people i care for. then, i experience additional guilt that, despite this confliction, i do not resolve to change myself, like they are not enough for me to change. i must be a bad person and incredibly selfish for this. they deserve someone much better than me.

these are all my thoughts for today. if anyone reads this, i wish you a good day.