EPISODE TWO
KURT’S BRAIN - INTERIOR
Kurt’s obsession with fashion went back a long way. It was part of a more general appreciation of beautiful and material things, which he’d had since he was a child.
Kurt suspected that this early aesthetic education was responsible for the direction of his own tastes. Things were beautiful to him in inverse proportion to their accessibility: a logic which struck him as childish for its fetishisation of impotence. But the 90s were about not growing up. The pages of the music and celebrity magazines that didn’t have Kurt’s face on them were filled with images of manufactured adolescence: teeny bopper twinks dressed in virginal white, A-listers doused with slime in studios resembling kindergartens, and an ageing parade of actors fresh out of high school drag.
He might seem like a kid to an industry obsessed with youth and its prophecies, but he was a grown up with a kid of his own. Even in earlier relationships he’d wanted the house with the picket fence. Tobi Vail used to say it was because of his parents’ divorce; they’d get into screaming arguments about his attachment to what she called the ‘bourgeois and patriarchal trap of success’. Kurt was hurt, but he did agree that he wanted these things as signs that he had made it. Not to the American dream that Vail despised him for, but to some indefinable sense of a future, and this was the only one he could imagine.
Such feelings were deeply unfashionable, and got in the way of the punk recklessness that had first attracted Vail, and which she held at arms’ length, an accessory to complete her image. Not that he minded them not interrogating these desires together. Kurt couldn’t put it more eloquently than this, but it felt both good and bad to dangle from her arm. To be used the way a man might use a beautiful woman. No one had read any Judith Butler yet, so Kurt could only say: Tobi’s riot grrl feminism made him feel like a woman, but it also made him know he wasn’t one. He was part of a group of people who obstructed people like Tobi, who’s desires stood in the way of her liberation. These wants stood for his involvement in patriarchy; women only wanted these things because men wanted them for them.
But Kurt didn’t care, he dreamed of being turned into an image, into an adornment for the grrls, the gyrls, the gworls of the future. He dreamt that his name would become a secret call passed between women in chokers at parties in lofts and warehouses in metropolitan areas of the United States. He dreamt of a teenage starlet gaining fame in a tv show where she wore his dirty bob for an audience too young to remember his music. He dreamt of the expansion of the internet and forums on which users would share photos of him and argue about what he wore and what he said.
He didn’t tell anyone these dreams. Unlike the house and family, these were just for him.
—Francis Whorrall-Campbell, from "[Digital Poetics 4.7] A Fragment on Kurt Cobain’s Transgender Ideas from ‘In Utero’" (The Hythe)
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@notwowee requested: Mettaton
There is so much to say about this robot but let me start off with my initial thoughts on him.
For like, a good good while I wasn't sure what Mettaton's gender was? In all fairness I was raised in a hella conservative country and Undertale was the first piece of media I'd ever interacted with that even depicted queer people, so for a bit I assumed the pink meant he was probably female. That wasn't helped when I discovered that Mettaton was Blooky's cousin with the locked pink house.
Luckily for me he was discussed enough that I eventually realized my mistake before I ever had to admit it. That would have been emabrassing.
Anyway I absolutely adored this robot and his style, his quizzes were cool and he had the most charming attitude that made me smile whenever he was there (not to mention the quizzes were funny, too). Don't get me started on the musical. Or when he hits you with the puzzle you've almost certainly forgotten the rules for. Hotland is very well done, even if some people dislike having to deal with Alphys's messages there (personally I thought those were neat).
Despite all this I have to admit that I initially thought he was a lot more shallow than expected. I didn't realize he was the type of person to actually care about his love ones, and I probably would've believed anyone who told me he treated Alphys like shit (okay maybe I'd have been a little skeptical, but you get the point).
Nowadays, I'm honestly pretty fond of his relationship with Alphys, as he's probably the one person she relied on the most during her various fuck ups. Also, his... his worries about Alphys in the ending where he becomes king... ah, that still makes me tear up a little. You can tell he cares and regrets not being a better friend to her.
This is only partly related but I dislike Papyton. For no reason, really, I just don't like it, and I disliked having to see it so often (until I learnt filters existed, anyway). I couldn't tell you why; the ship's perfectly fine. Yet if I see a fic with it I click out. Oh well, maybe I'll get over it one day.
I could totally see a world in which I become as attached to Mettaton as I am to Cagliostro from GBF. I'm not trans by any stretch (perhaps I'm non-binary, given I don't actually care much about my own gender in the slightest, but for now I'll stick with cis+ until I actually feel like I should consider it more) but I do have admiration for characters like them who strive to be their best selves in terms of appearance and are absolutely confident in it. I suppose if I was born a girl, I'd be more attached to Mettaton than Cagliostro, but eh. Who knows.
Mettaton's importance (or rather, lack of) in the genocide run is saddening, though I have come to terms with it because in terms of the game's writing it's a pretty damn good decision. I do love that he got fangames giving him an actual battle though, it's lovely to see him actually get that chance to fight back.
I feel the need to restate once more that I adore his relationship with Alphys, and seeing works explore that relationship is always great. I think Mettaton is one of the least fan-explored of the game's main cast, so it'd be wonderful to see more works. It's a shame I'm too busy thinking about Sans, Frisk and Chara to do that myself, though.
One more thing: Until I wrote this post, I always wondered why Mettaton didn't just fight the human in his indestructible body instead, especially in the genocide route. I mean, it's obviously because his other forms are the ones actually designed for human eradication, of course, but I also like to think it's because he likes those forms a lot more than his box form, as he sees them as a proper expression of who he truly is. I just think that's neat. Sure, he's indestructible when stuck in the closet, hiding who he truly is, but it's restricting, and wouldn't you prefer to simply be you? Even if it could mean you could get hurt? I think that question is somewhat inseparable from Mettaton's character as a whole, as his overly confident and theatrical personality could perhaps be one answer to that. It's fine if you get hurt a little, because in the end you'll be much happier for it.
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anyone heard of this show?
okay if anyone can help me find this i will love you forever bc i know it is not actually worth the hours-long effort it would take me to find this (if i ever did) so back in the day i used to just find random gay storylines on youtube and watch them, like you do. one of them had two guys in suits making out in the woods after one of them was supposed to get married and instead decided to make out with his best man-ish type person. the actual show was SO WEIRD (i watched it all the way through once, i think it was about six or eight eps and from the cut down with just the two dudes you would never know how strange it was. i think aliens were involved??? i can't remember if it was subtitled or not, my brain now wants to say it was uk - maybe scottish - but i don't know if we can trust that). i know they were work buddies first and it took marrying-dude until his wedding to realize he loved his friend as more than a friend.
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I made this blog mainly as a place to store art + memes for my fandoms and doodles of my original stories. I’ve posted a lot of the former, but none of the latter, so… Here you go? Have some goofy “incorrect quotes” inspired jokes of a project of mine called The Name-Oath.
Context is indented and italicized, but you can probably read through the doodles below without getting too confused if you skip it:
The first half of the actual plot is your standard fae romance starring a human woman who doesn’t realize the male lead is a supernatural creature, and just thinks he’s really into cosplaying alone in a mansion in some freaky forest. The second half is rom-com shenanigans between the divorced human woman and male lead after the world's ugliest breakup. He desperately tries to get back together at every waking moment and she just wants to hang out with her bestie Summer and raise her half-fae daughter in peace.
The human woman is named Eglantine, but goes by Egg. She got stuck with the nickname during high school and decided to start going by it in an effort to have a more "average" sounding name. This did not work as intended, but it certainly helped her avoid getting her name stolen when she first met the male lead. She's something called a skipwitch. This is a whole worldbuilding thing I'm not going to get into here.
The male lead is named Kieran. He is a drama king. He spent several centuries under magical house arrest. He can talk to rats. He has pretty hair. This is all you need to know about him, except maybe the fact that he's royalty.
Summer is Egg's best friend, and she is the resident fae expert in her and Egg's coven. Competitive and protective of Egg. She hates Kieran's guts, and the feeling is mutual.
Egg and Kieran's daughter is named Violet, but she goes by Froggy. She is a terrifying force of nature by virtue of being the offspring of a skipwitch and Unseelie prince. Enjoys microwave pizzas, her pet beta fish, video games, and getting her way.
Alois is Kieran's invisible butler. He's a surprisingly talented singer.
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